#and yeah im happy with it! im so much happier with it than without

[youreverydayfangirl]

KING OF MY HEART

pairing: max verstappen x singer reader

summary: the one where she loudly love him, she begins a new era and he never stops loving her

warning: self doubt

a/n: RAWRRRR

face claim: sabrina carpenter

f1 masterlist

main masterilst

series masterlist

y/nsprivate has posted

liked by jimmyandsassysdad, thatoneartgirlalex and 20 others

y/nsprivate I LOVE HIM SO MUCH GUYSSS

tagged: jimmyandsassysdad

jimmyandsassysdad 🖤🖤

-> y/nsprivate 🖤

thatoneartgirlalex IM SO HAPPY FOR YOUU

-> y/nsprivate AHHHHHHHHHHHH

keekslikestospammmm the cutest couple

-> y/nsprivate ❤️

livbereallydumb HAPPY FOR YOU

-> y/nsprivate NEVER BEEN SO HAPPY

itssabrinaaa UR TOO CUTE

-> y/nsprivate u too urself in the mirror

-----------------

It’s a rainy Sunday, and Y/n and Max are cozied up in his apartment, surrounded by a pile of blankets, snacks, and the soft glow of fairy lights. They’d planned to go out, but the rain kept them in, and neither of them minded one bit.

Y/n is flipping through Netflix, and Max has his head on her lap, eyes closed, looking so content she can’t help but smile. She runs her fingers gently through his hair, watching him relax even more under her touch.

“Y’know, I think this might actually be better than going out,” he murmurs without opening his eyes, his voice soft and relaxed.

“Oh really?” she teases, poking his cheek gently. “No big plans for today, Mr. World Champ?”

He opens one eye, grinning lazily up at her. “I mean, I could race anyone and anything, but nothing beats just… this,” he says, gesturing to the cozy setup around them.

She feels a warmth spread through her, leaning down to give him a quick kiss. “Good, because I think I’d still pick a lazy day with you over anything.”

He smiles, pulling her closer until they’re wrapped up together in their little blanket fort. The rain keeps falling outside, but inside, everything is warm, calm, and perfect - just them, soft laughter, and the feeling that they’d always choose each other.

--------

jimmyandsassysdad has posted

liked by y/nsprivate, leosfather and 42 others

jimmyandsassysdad valentines with my valentine

y/nsprivate 🖤

-> jimmyandsassysdad 🖤

thatoneartgirlalex WIFEYYY

-> jimmyandsassysdad WIFE MATERIAL FOR REAL

-> y/nsprivate 🤭

leosfather yeah your alright

-> y/nsprivate glad we finally got your approval charlie 😂

----------------------

As Y/n sat curled up on the couch, Pluto sprawled out across her lap, she caught her reflection in the dark window. It was one of those moments when insecurities tried to creep in. But as she started to fall into that spiral of self-doubt, a familiar voice pulled her back.

“Hey, what’s going on in that pretty head?” Max murmured, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pressing a gentle kiss to her temple.

Y/n hesitated, running her hand along Pluto’s fur as he settled in. “It’s nothing… I was just thinking, you could probably do better, y’know? I mean… just look at your exes.”

Max tilted his head, a gentle smile forming on his lips as he reached out to take her hand. “Look at you, love,” he said softly, brushing his thumb over her knuckles. “I’ve never been happier, and I’ve never been more certain of what I want.” He pulled her close, pressing a kiss to her forehead as Pluto snuggled against them both, purring contentedly.

“See?” Max chuckled, “Even Pluto thinks you’re the best.” He kissed her cheek, tightening his arm around her. “There’s no one else I’d rather do this with, okay? So don’t ever doubt it.”

-----------------------

f1gossip has posted

liked by 239, 956 people

f1gossip Tension rising between Lando Norris and girlfriend ExBsf. They were caught earlier in a heated exchange. Could this have anything to do with the new rumors which have been circling?

user1 NOOOOO

user2 i used to like her but shes been so sneaky recently

user3 shes creating so much drama for what

user4 I MISS Y/N AND LANDO

-------------------------------

yourusername has posted

liked by maxverstappen1, alexandrasaintmleux and 10, 948, 593 others

COMMENTS ON THIS POST HAVE BEEN LIMITED

----------------

---------------------------

hey its literally been a fat minute guys im so so sorry

but im feeling way better so thank you guys

im sorry it took so long but i had exam block which is for my grade 12 stuff so that was my focus and then we went to sydney for a holiday so ive just been so preoccupied

oh and it was my birthday a few weeks ago aswell

so sorry everything has been hectic but im on holidays now so ill try and post much more frequently

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[diorsluv]

casual , part 5

“ i thought you thought of me better ”

series m. list previous chapter next chapter

( socialmedia!au )

vivianliu

liked by yourusername, jackhughes, and 72,110 others

vivianliu she was better off without you 😘

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

username44 ethan slander goes crazy

yourusername WE LOOK SO HOT 🤭🤭

→ vivianliu ALL YOU BABE ITS ALL YOU

yourusername also idk about that caption..

→ vivianliu oh girl noooo

→ yourusername 😔

→ vivianliu HE CAN’T BE STRAIGHT UP WITH U BABE he’s always beating around the bush

→ edwards.73 that’s subjective

→ vivianliu “tHAtS sUbJEctiVe” stfu

→ yourusername VIVI STOP BE NICE

→ markestapa it is pretty subjective

→ mackie.samo i think the bush is just a decorative piece to further brighten up the room

→ dylanduke25 he is not a bush beater ❌

username27 MARRY ME PLEASE

username10 IDK WHO I WANT MORE

→ username67 BOAF!!!!

→ username78 BOAF?

→ username96 BOAFFFF.

colecaufield i second that

→ lhughes_06 i third that

→ _quinnhughes i fourth that

→ trevorzegras i fifth that

→ rutgermcgroarty i sixth that

→ mackie.samo i seventh that

→ jackhughes i eighth that

→ _alexturcotte i ninth that

→ markestapa i tenth that

→ luca.fantilli i eleventh that

→ dylanduke25 i twelfth that

→ adamfantilli i thirteenth that

→ yourusername i disagree

→ edwards.73 guys you’re supposed to be on my side??????

→ luca.fantilli we just wanted to fit in 💔

username72 so ethan and rosie confirmed????

→ vivianliu 🤐

→ username99 pretty much

rutgermcgroarty yeah bc she already had me 🙄

→ vivianliu she had me first

→ yourusername LADIESSSSS stop fighting there’s enough to go around 😈😈

→ edwards.73 but i’m better though

→ rutgermcgroarty hell no you’re not edwards.73

lhughes_06 i hope she knows plan b is called plan b for a reason

→ vivianliu LMAOOO

→ yourusername bro WHAT????

username14 I CAN DO BETTER THAN ETHAN I PROMISEEE

username49 yall r so hot

edwards.73 didn’t sound that way last night

→ vivianliu is sex all you think about with her 😐

→ edwards.73 no????

→ yourusername damn

→ edwards.73 I SAID IT’S NOT

→ lhughes_06 i swear to god ethan i’m going to beat your ass

_alexturcotte she’s too pretty for him

→ vivianliu RETWEET RETWEET

→ edwards.73 ????

trevorzegras i could treat her better fr

→ vivianliu ion know about that one..

username95 I THOUGHT THEY ALL LIKED ETHAN??? 😭

mackie.samo stop dogging on my boy

→ vivianliu “your boy” is gonna get my wife all hurt and shit

→ dylanduke25 TRUST IN HIM DUDE

→ vivianliu hell no

username12 please she’s so happy thooo

username80 i mean as long as he doesn’t break her heart idc fr 🤷‍♀️

_quinnhughes that’s what i’ve been saying but she won’t listen to me 😒

→ vivianliu she’s delusional

→ yourusername NO IM NOTTT

→ _quinnhughes yes you are stop lying to yourself

luca.fantilli who said he needed her??

→ vivianliu everyone

→ yourusername ☹️

→ edwards.73 i did

→ luca.fantilli oh

→ markestapa OH????

→ mackie.samo look at our eddy he’s so confident

→ edwards.73 i am after last night mackie.samo

→ jackhughes oh god please never say that again

dylanduke25 i can smell the pizza from the other room and you won’t share shit 😒

→ vivianliu she bought it to eat with the boy that just stood her up so no we aren’t gonna share

→ yourusername ‼️‼️

→ colecaufield why did she buy the food and not him 😭😭

→ vivianliu THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING colecaufield

→ lhughes_06 HE DID WHAT????

→ _quinnhughes he let her pay for the food then stood her up. that’s great, that’s real fucking great.

→ jackhughes i’m gonna fight him

→ yourusername GUYS ITS FINE

jackhughes our dad’s gonna be livid when he finds out what that asshole did to her

→ vivianliu AS HE SHOULD

→ yourusername oh my god it’s not that big of a deal it doesn’t even matter

→ lhughes_06 ???? OF COURSE IT MATTERS

→ _quinnhughes don’t undermine ts it’s not gonna help you rosie

edwards.73

liked by yourusername, rutgermcgroarty, and 99,312 others

edwards.73 then she said you make me happier than ever

view all comments

username77 is this him clapping back????

username46 there’s no way he and vivian are beefing rn

markestapa go bag your girl 🙏🙏

→ edwards.73 bagging my girl 🫡

→ yourusername “my girl” ?

→ mackie.samo LMAOOO

→ dylanduke25 this is definitely going in the gc

→ luca.fantilli ethan it’s over for u

vivianliu no don’t be pulling this shit

username80 is it just me who’s getting the tiiiiiniest ick

→ username51 i am too babe dw

jackhughes uh huh..

_quinnhughes ok i don’t know bout all that

username31 kissing in the rain oh my god i’m melting

username27 rosie’s so lucky

→ username12 ethan’s the lucky one here 🙄

lhughes_06 what if i bashed your face in

→ edwards.73 but why

→ lhughes_06 i told you and everyone else NOT to touch my sister and you quite literally did the complete opposite

→ edwards.73 hey i didn’t even pay attention to her at first man

→ lhughes_06 😒

username54 i want a relationship like theirs so badly

→ yourusername no babe find yourself a healthy relationship 🫶

→ username33 WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

→ username81 EXPLAIN?? yourusername

→ username20 UMM WHAT?

yourusername i don’t remember that one

→ edwards.73 i got the receipts baby don’t fight it

→ yourusername 😳

yourusername also wow she’s pretty

→ edwards.73 mhm she’s my gorgeous girl

→ yourusername oh is that her name?

→ edwards.73 yea got her saved as mine ❤️ in my contacts it’s nbd

username10 the candlelit dinner ☹️

colecaufield as much as it pains me to say it you guys look cute together

liked by edwards.73

_alexturcotte maybe i was wrong about you two and as long as you keep making her happy idc

→ edwards.73 i’ll keep her happy for the rest of our lives 🫡🫡

→ yourusername wow that’s a pretty long time!

trevorzegras oh ethan you crack me up

→ edwards.73 this one was a knee slapper wasn’t it

→ trevorzegras got me laughing and shit

→ yourusername oh so this post was a joke 😐

→ edwards.73 NO IT WASN’T I SWEAR ON MY LIFE yourusername

rutgermcgroarty why do i feel sick to my stomach rn

→ edwards.73 i think it’s called jealousy lil bro

→ rutgermcgroarty no i think it’s because you aren’t treating her right buddy

username55 even rut doesn’t like the relationship 😭😭

→ username79 99% positive he secretly likes her

→ username23 THATS WHAT IM SAYING

mackie.samo did you hard-ish soft launch simply because you were being scrutinized 😭

→ edwards.73 perhaps i did and what about it??

→ mackie.samo ok im usually on your side but bro..

username46 what happened to the “no labels”

username25 is this not lowkey toxic 💀💀

username98 whew lord save my girl please

adamfantilli you guys are so gross and icky

→ edwards.73 keep hating 🤬🤬

→ vivianliu i wholeheartedly agree

→ lhughes_06 that’s what i’ve been saying but no one listens 🙄

→ jackhughes CORRECT

username47 why are we all divided over this i thought we liked the relationship???

→ username53 but they’re kinda toxic af 😭

username9 this shakes me to my core

luca.fantilli is that the after sex pic

→ edwards.73 🤫

→ dylanduke25 oh god ew

→ colecaufield that did not have to be a question

username22 this is so cute it hurts

username28 SO ADORABLEEE

username91 new fav couple alert

dylanduke25 aw that’s cute

→ edwards.73 good to know ur not a hater

→ mackie.samo DUDE i was just stating facts

→ edwards.73 uh huh we’re kicking u out the gc

→ mackie.samo BROOOO

next chapter notes ) hey loves guess who didn’t proofread!!! I FEEL LIKE THIS IS LESS AND LESS ENTERTAINING IDKKK

tags: @dancerbailey3 @hughesfein @loveforaugust@alwaysclassyeagle@love4ldr@inhoodmood@bunting58@crazycat-ladys-blog@smoooore@bunbunbl0gs

[stemcellee]

november 25 2024

i haven't really put a lot of words out there recently but i think i finally have something to get off my chest after thinking about it for a while...and to avoid spam it's under the cut D:

happy holidays to everyone though can't believe the season is already here!!!

med school is so hard!! i admit when i first got in, i was like "im not gonna let it get to me. i have amazing stress management skills and i'll handle everything so well!!" and then i fought a lot with dissapointment in myself when i was struggling with things i never imagined.

stuff i feel like i wasn't prepared for:

the constant worry about not doing enough. you see snippets of other people's lives when they are productive and it makes you feel like everyone is so much more productive than you

how hard it can be to compartmentalized. both ways!! when i'm relaxing ("relaxing") i'm planning how to somehow be productive while relaxing. when i'm working, im wishing so bad i had spent my relaxing time ACtually relaxing

attachment. this feels like such a personal problem but when i'm doing practice questions the clinical vignette is consistently similar to people in my life who have been affected by the pathologies i'm about to be tested on. a 70 year old woman with hypertension and diabetes...succumbs to decompensated heart failure. a 50 year old woman has bouts of angina...and suffers a massive MI. a 60 year old male is rushed to the hospital for chest pain...and dies of ventricular arrythmia an hour later. it's so scary thinking about how your parents and loved ones could be those patients!! it motivates me to make sure i learn these things for my future patients but it's sad carrying this around. i guess this is part of why i went to med school anyways...

how easy it is to forget about yourself. i will have days of highly productive focused studying/work but suddenly will get slapped with an unexpected migraine. i am getting a lot better about this but i have to remember that working out, eating well, etc are not wastes of time. i need to preserve myself most importantly becasue without me, i can't even do any of this!!

last thing. projection. i find myself making up problems sometimes that i think is a coping mechanism for projecting my own frustrations into something to blame. like studying is tough and i get frustrated that it doesn't come as easily to me sometimes, so i feel upset that things aren't how i expected them to be, like if i had more support id be happier/better at studying etc. while that's true, i recognize it's also a coping mechanism to place the blame externally...

anyways yeah there are a lot of things i've been thinking about in the thick of it all. med school is not what i expected it to be, and i really cannot blame others for not knowing what to expect either because truly you cannot anticipate how you will feel. thanks for reading it's been a min

[starlightdreaming]

Lucifer x Fem!Reader!

Content warning: ANGST TO FLUFF! :3 REALISTIC themes of REALITY (FROM MY PERSPECTIVE) this is a vent fic but I added my delusions of fluff for comfort, theres slight starvation of oneself (eating disorders right?) (this fic been in the back of my head all week)

(this MADE ME CRY WHILE WRITING I KID YOU NOT)

Synopsis: dealing with reality isn’t easy for anyone, upon walking home one day, you found a mirror, hoping you could sell the mirror for some cash, you discovered something money can’t buy… happiness.

(im craving for fluff)

making a one shot for my delusions

(the song that supported my delusions)

ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭*Dancing within the mirror* ੈ✩‧₊˚

Your life wasn’t very pleasing to live, hell, life wasn’t pleasing to live at all, all the stress and endurance was so tiring, going to school, day in, day out was the least of your worries after you graduated.

Every kid has always said, “I can’t wait to grow up and do my own things!” at least once. once.

Now that you are an adult, nothing was as it seemed when you were younger. Yeah, you can do anything you wanted if you put your mind to it but it came with a price.. and that price was money.

Without money, you couldn’t do anything you dreamed of doing, without money, you couldn’t afford the things you even wanted- and to get anything you wanted, you had to get a ‘job.’ it’s the balance of life some say, but to you? it was control, it wasn’t about what you want or what you get, it’s all about having you work for the… them.

those people. the 1% some would call them.

Your mind deteriorated more and more from just not living anymore, just surviving.. you work, get the money, pay your taxes, pay your bills: your car, your electricity, your water, food, housing, insurance- everything.

You sat on the edge of your bed in your cold dark room, the moonlight twinkling in, it’s luminous rays escaping through the curtains at the window, you laid your head down crying and stressed, you can’t continue to survive like this, you just wanted to live.

You watch old shows and movies for comfort, wishing life would never change and forever stay the same, you wanted the world to stop revolving so you can just breathe. You watch cartoons and such, cause it seems they are living much happier than you ever will. Your mind always drifted off to just one day, you can lay in the grass and listen to the soft winds, the trees and grass rustling, dancing together as one with the wind.

You drew characters of your own, characters from your favorite shows and wrote everything your mind would drift off to, to cope with the bleak life that you had.

Sometimes, you wish reality could just.. shift, like if you wanted to live in your comfort characters universe? you could just poof! and then be there, talking for however long you wanted.

You sighed as you turned off your device, going to bed, too tired to do anything due to fatigue from nine hours of labor, you tucked yourself in, playing soft music to help you sleep with some sort of comfort, you closed your eyes to await another lifeless day of nothingness.

✧ • ✧ • ✧ • ✧ •✧

Another exhausting day at work, you walk home, your car broke down for the nth time, knowing how corrupt reality is, it was intentional by the people who you got it from. Another bill to be paid, just to get your car fixed, just to work more, pay more, just to feed them.

You barely made it through the monthly payments, saving enough to pay them all off but not enough to feed you. You silently walked in the grass, no sidewalks to be seen cause everyone used cars nowadays, never their feet and it made the people who are supposed to run the country (or states), neglect their ideals that they offered the people.

You sighed, exhausted, walking for a whole hour, you decided to rest. You worked nine hours that day, walking endlessly and now you’re here, walking home. You pulled a bottle of water you had with you from your pocket, taking a sip to refreshen yourself, it was less half than empty but it was enough for you to be hydrated for your next other hour you had to walk home. When you drive to work, it’s only eight minutes but walking? it was fifteen times longer.

You got up to your feet to walk again, stuffing the empty plastic bottle into your pocket to find a place to dispose it, not wanting to litter the earth than it already has been from neglectful people who could care less where their trash goes.

Walking past a dumpster, you neared your destination to home, you tried to put in the bottle but as you did, you saw something glimmering in your eyes, you took a second glance at what was shining in the dumpster, there, you see the sun reflecting off a mirror- but not just any mirror, a beautiful one. It looked old and antique but it was so mesmerizing to look at, it had unique designs, embedded with gold, at the top of the mirror, sat an apple, a white snake wrapped around it, it was in quite good condition, not even the glass was cracked, ‘who would throw such beauty away?’ you thought, you wanted to take it home but you hesitated, wouldn’t you look like a hobo if you were to jump in to get it?

You looked in all directions, seeing if anyone was watching, when the coast was clear, you jumped in to get it, trying your best to reach it, without falling in. After a few seconds to a minute or so, you managed to get out scot-free, holding the mirror with both hands, you looked at the distinctive details more closely, it really looked at shiny as gold, you couldn’t tell if it was, you were no genius to know, nor did you have the knowledge to know, all you knew it was dirty from the grime in the dump, it definitely needed a cleaning.

You held the heavy glass carefully, walking down your neighborhood to your home, you put it down gently next to your front door, trying to get your keys to unlock it, when you did, you happily tuck your keys into you pocket, picking up the mirror and walking inside.

The moment you got this mirror, you thought about how it could benefit you, ‘could maybe clean it and then put it on sale at an antique shop or mall?’ you thought, hoping to grab a bit of money to help you probably get something eat for once other than toast and cereal.

You put the mirror in your bathroom tub, getting towels and wipes to carefully remove the dirt from the lined details, sticking your nail covered by the wipe, to chalk the dirt out from deep corners, after a bit, you washed it off carefully with water, holding it gently as to not let it fall and shatter, you turned off the water, grabbing a towel to carefully dry it, not wanting to accidentally scratch the glass somehow.

You took the mirror to your room, holding it with both hands, you sat it down to the ground, making it lean against the wall, you stretched before you took off your work clothes, deciding you wanted to shower after today, I mean, after walking endlessly for two hours at work (not to mention the additional two hours, walking home), and dumpster diving? You definitely could use one. You began collecting comfy clothes to relax in, digging through your drawers, you got just a tee and some shorts and an extra pair of undergarments, you took your clothes, grabbed a towel and left to the bathroom, leaving the mirror alone in the dimly sunlit room.

While you cleaned yourself, unbeknownst to you, the mirror flickered in and out bright yellow auras, the little dust and dusk of yellow floated around the mirror like fireflies, it was glowing at that point, bright yellow, the gold designs that traced around the mirror began to glow as well, and it immediately went out as you entered your room, a towel on your head, you sighed as you jumped into bed, digging out your work clothes that you left on your bed to grab your phone, you tossed your clothes to the side as you laid back down, scrolling through what-not to distract yourself from the loathing pain of loneliness in your life.

From evening to dusk, you blinked lazily, tired of scrolling on social media for hours, you continued to do so until you stopped at a video, a video that was quite a little too relatable. You thought that - that’s when you know it’s time to put the phone down, it’s enough internet for the day, You plugged in your phone, placing it on the night stand.

You shifted under the covers, bringing your pillow to your chest to hold it, hugging it tightly as if it were to ever be your significant other, knowing full well that - that one day, will never come… but it doesn’t hurt to imagine it right?

You hugged the pillow tightly, nuzzling your face in it, looking at the mirror that faced your bed, you laid there silently, feeling the loneliness get to you again, the clock ticking in your room as you waited for sleep to consume you, you closed your eyes, resting your head in the pillow you held, before falling asleep. As you slept, the mirror began to glow again, the same golden aura surrounded it, little small dots of light floating around it again, the light began to glow more, the longer you slept, the small dots of light danced in the air, eventually making it to your bed, the small dots of light gently touched your skin, one even kissed your nose, it made your face scrunch as you scratched it, removing the tickling feeling in your sleep, you then turn the other direction of your bed, faced away from the mirror, the lights backed away from you, like curious little fireflies, they floated around you once again, raining golden dust onto your head as if it were sandman, raining sand onto your head, gifting you the night of pure lofty dreams.

✧ • ✧ • ✧ • ✧ •✧

You groaned as the morning light from the sun entered the room, waking you up from your dreams, it wasn’t often when you dreamed, usually they’d be nightmares or just plain weird.

You sat up on your bed, rubbing your eyes to wipe the sleep off them, you yawn as you shifted to slide off your bed, walking past the mirror to leave your room, with a quick glance while walking past it, it showed a different person in your reflection, you paused, you stepped back to look again, now puzzled, did you see that right? You look back at the mirror, seeing your reflection perfectly fine, you shook the thought off, thinking it was just you not being fully awake and your eyes were just messing with you, you left your room after that, not thinking anything further about it.

You brushed your teeth, brushed your hair, anything and everything needed to start the day, you grabbed your work clothes and your phone, glancing at the mirror again before taking a photo of it, later deciding to post it on the internet to see if anyone was willing to buy it. You left your house, locking the door, awaiting another repetitive day of your life… wasting away.

You had woke early for a reason, without your car (and the inability to afford an uber, nor risk spending any money), you had to walk to work, it was going to be a long exhausting day but that’s just life, the imbalance of it from what you could see at least.

After a long day of work, the painful exhaustion of walking home, you opened your door, dreadfully, today was worst than the last, you sighed as you went straight to your room, taking your work clothes off and jumping straight to bed, crying.

You curled up in your bed, grabbing your pillow to hold as comfort as you silently sobbed, the sun, slowly fading away from the room, dusking out that the day was nearly gone. You didn’t bother how hungry you felt, you just wanted to cry yourself to sleep, your co-workers were more aggressive today towards you, tripping you and telling you how you don’t seem to put more effort into you job as they do, it even got to the point where they’d report you to the manager, it was only worse when the manager actually believed them! You’d end up being scolded by your boss, not even he tried to listen to your side of the story, making this all the much worse to endure. You wanted to cry at work, you did during all of your lunch break, you spent the whole time crying silently in the restroom, forgetting to get at least something to eat during your time.

You just wished this whole nightmare could be over, you barely had time for your mental health, not to mention the time to do anything else to cope with the repetitiveness of reality either. You cried yourself to sleep that night, not the first of your many rests. It was however, noticed by the mirror you seemed to have forgotten about.

The mirror shimmered softly with light, the same as it did last night, unaware of it’s presence of magic, the light reached your bed, alluring you with comfort as you rested, dots of light danced around your exhausted body, giving you sweet dreams as it did last time, you smiled in your sleep, dreams overflowing in your subconscious as you slept, your body seemed more relaxed when the light tended and touched you, draining the soreness out your body, hoping you’d wake up feeling much better.

✧ • ✧ • ✧ • ✧ •✧

More often than not, you’d wake up exhilarated and refreshed from the nights before, it bothered you at first but you adjusted to it rather quickly, seeing as you always felt bursted with energy, you could take on the day and go home like you just went through hell to just sleep and wake up feeling alright again. You still haven’t had gotten any responses on anything about the mirror in your room, no one willing to offer for it, it just sat in your room collecting dust, it had been like about a month or so by now, your depressed mind never really bothered with time anymore, seeing as it was pointless, nothing really changes in your life, you don’t even bother with holidays, seeing as there was no one to celebrate with.

After many times and days going through the same thing, you crashed onto the floor in your room, laying next to the mirror. You couldn’t bother getting up into bed this time, everything just felt so tolling, your co-workers were at it again, excusing themselves with how they had families to take care of and you didn’t, they hated how you got paid the same as they did, expecting you to be rich or something by now. You hugged yourself on the floor that night, crying once again, you were facing the direction of the mirror, ignoring it in your vast of self loathing.

You just wished and craved for affection from someone, anyone, just something, anything to stop the pain you felt inside your heart but that would never come, no one cared for you as you hoped that one day they would, you fell asleep on the floor that night, crying yourself to sleep once again, no different than all the other nights that shared the same.

An emitting aura glowed softly again from the mirror, amongst your sleep, brighter than all the times than the last, this time, it didn’t try to comfort you in your sleep, no, this time, it was trying to wake you, wanting you see what it held within itself, the dots of light kissed your face, their bright auras bringing you to wake, you opened your eyes, curious from what the light source was, you sat up from the floor rubbing your eye, “what the..” you say as you blink awake now, you see the mirror glowing with a golden aura, you were bewildered from such a thing being able to happen.

You looked into the mirror before backing away, your reflection making you gasp in shock, you slowly leaned into the mirrors view, looking at your reflection again, it was so different than what you actually looked like, you looked more… demonic? it was creepy, it made your skin crawl, the light that was doting on you, floated around you, catching your attention. You raised your hand out, the little light landing in your hand, you looked and admired its radiance before it flew up and towards the mirror, going straight into it, “wha…” you said rather quietly im confusion and curiosity, the mirror glass sending waves against itself like a water drop landing into water.

You hesitated, you weren’t sure what to do in this situation, when you first got this mirror- you didn’t expect it to be fucking magical!

The mirror calmly whispered a tune, alluring you, you looked at your reflection again, it going from your human self to something else.. You reached your hand out to the mirror, touching the glass but when you did, your hand phased through it, you pulled your hand back in surprise as you watched the mirror glass ripple from movement, you shifted closer to the mirror, the golden light being the only thing that lit up your room in the dead of night.

You put your hand through the glass again, feeling more calm about it, seeing as it was safe, you smiled in fascination, it wasn’t long before someone or something grabbed your hand on the other end, you tried to pull away but it held your writ tightly, you saw a hand hold onto you, covered in black and claws that looked sharp as knives, it pulled you through as your yelp in shock and fear, closing you eyes as you expected to endure some sort of pain coming your way but you didn’t feel any, you felt the warmth of someone’s chest, your hand in theirs, his other on your back, ensuring your safety through the glass.

“Greetings, little duckling.” The man coo’d, you look up to the stranger who caught your fall in confusion, your eyes widened when you realized it was your major comfort character currently, the devil himself: Lucifer. You pushed yourself away from embarrassment, trying to look at your surroundings, seeing as you were in a massive ball room, the tiles on the floor were shining gold as the stairs were cloaked with red, “where am I?” you panic, looking at your body, seeing as your color was different and your body was less humane, “what is happening?” you ask, startled, looking at Lucifer.

He walked closer to you, “hey, it’s okay, you’re safe here, I won’t hurt you,” he reassured as he reached his hand out, patiently waiting for you to take it, you gave yourself a moment to breathe, trying to process everything, you looked at him as he smiled comfortingly at you, waiting patiently for you to take his hand, before long, you took his hand, he leaned toward your hand kissing it gently, a surge of golden light looming from the kiss to around your body. You blinked in surprise and look at your body, clothes had been changed from your work attire to something more extravagant and elegant, you were suddenly wearing a ball gown, you picked up a piece of the fabric of the dress, looking closely at the details it withheld.

“Through that mirror of yours, i’ve been watching you,” he says as he stands up straight again, holding your hand in his, you looked at him, slightly uncomfortable from that statement, his eyes widened at realization as he turned away before scratching his neck, “I mean- I don’t mean in a weird way- like- I was- I just-“ he sighed in defeat, unable to explain his situation correctly, “It’s not what it seems,” he attempts again, looking at you with soft eyes, “it’s just- that mirror is a portal, it’s a portal that only one side could see from, I don’t even have control where it goes but-“ He trails off, “look,” he says, taking both your hands now as you stare at him, patiently waiting for him to fully give you his explanation, “It was something I made long ago,” he attempts again, “I left it on earth for centuries but I still had access to it, from one end I mean.” he pauses as he turns both of you toward the portal, his hand trailing across the glass, changing the location on the other end, you watched with your mouth a-gap, in awe from how surreal this all was.

“I watched many humans through this mirror, good and bad,” he says as he shows many past memories the mirror seemed to hold, “It’s the only thing I have that shows the good in humanity… sometimes.” he says as he cracks a side smile, hoping you aren’t weirded out too much by the whole ordeal.

Letting go of Lucifer’s hand, you lifted both hands to your chest, intertwining your hands together as you walked toward the portal mirror, “so you’re saying..” you spoke as you stared at the glass, “I have a magical mirror in my room?” You ask, turning to him, your dress swaying as you turned, “yeah,” he smiles in relief that you aren’t panicking as he was, “we could go with that.” he says as he walked to you again, “I watched all the nights you cried..” he began as he looked away from your gaze, “I saw how much pain you endured everyday, it was obvious in your eyes and…” he explains to you, his demeanor changing to nervousness as he avoided your gaze, “I tried to make your nights better as you slept, hoping you’d wake up, feeling like your days would be better.” he confesses with a awkward smile on his face as he showed you the golden light in his hands, resembling the same as the light you saw glowing around the mirror in your room.

“So you’re the reason behind why I always felt better in the morning?” You ask, expecting he would confirm your answer, “Yeah.” he admits, rubbing his neck again, you walk up to him, taking his hands in yours as you raised both your hands up together with a smile and a, “thank you.” Lucifer eyes sparkled as he felt a flutter in his stomach, he sort of expected you to panic or something but this was way better, he smiled at you softly, “I saw you crying earlier, worse than ever before,” he says emphatically, he placed of your gloved hands on his shoulder, the other one held with his, his hand was placed gently on your waist as he leaned towards you, “so I thought maybe this time,” he pauses, turning you to a different direction and dipping you gracefully, “I could make your dreams a reality.” he spoke with an ever graceful smile, doting on your beauty.

Your eyes widened in wonderment as he began to move on his own, “wait- I can’t dance-“ you try to exclaim but your feet moved on your own as well, “don’t worry my dove,” he says as he looks at you with that sparkle in his eyes again, “I got you covered on that, just enjoy it, like a dream.” he comforts you, his voice soft and alluring.

He snapped his fingers and you saw a set of ducks with bow ties and orchestrated instruments appearing with them, they sat between the open space of the stairs, “fond of ducks, i see?” you ask, giving him a sided glance with a smile, he rolls his eyes playfully before taking your hands into his again, “not as fond as I am with you tonight,” he says back, smirking playfully as he guides you towards the center of the ballroom, “you’re absolutely stunning tonight.”

✧ • ✧ • ✧ • ✧ •✧

(prolly too dramatic but it was making me go insane while writing this (fluff is my kryptonite))

✧ • ✧ • ✧ • ✧ •✧

A melody began to play in the background as you let Lucifer take the lead, looking at him in awe, entranced by his charms and his smile.

He spun with you around the ball room, your dress flowing behind every move you done, you looked at your dress in wonderment, you then looked back at Lucifer who was still giving you doe eyes. You had your mouth opened slightly, still processing that this was actually happening… and with Lucifer of all people.

Watching and feeling every shift both your bodies had made, you both move left and right in circles, you yelped softly in surprise when you began to spin, one of his hands still in yours, bringing you back to him to waltz across the massive golden ballroom, you looked at him again as he gave you a toothy grin, making you smile in pure delight from this dream.

It wasn’t long until golden light began to ignite under his feet, each step he took left a trail of golden luminescence, ducks soon flipped up from under ground as if they went under water to collect food to eat, they swam across the ballroom floor as you both stared into each others eyes, lost within the melody.

You looked down at your own feet in amazement, your own steps were leaving a trail of golden light, those golden trails soon grew into buds that blossomed into lotus flowers, the flowers slowly drifted across the floor, gracefully, like they floated above water. You were mesmerized in such beauty of magic, it wasn’t long until you felt a hand trace under your chin, bringing your gaze back to Lucifer, “eyes on me, my darling.” he says with a soft smile, bringing his hand back into yours.

You felt flustered from his gesture as he sprouted out his wings, all in their grace and beauty, you looked away again as you heard him chuckle a light laugh at your reaction, he closed his eyes as he soaked in the moment, spinning you around again before bringing you in, your attention came back to him as he opened his eyes to look at you, you began to feel light, you looked away for the third time, you saw yourself floating in the air with Lucifer, you looked back at him in a little worry but it quickly vanished away as his gaze comforted you, “I got you.” he says, knowing what was running through your mind.

The golden light still trailed after you both, the ducks and lotus flowers floating up with you both in unison, you were so dazed by how pleasant you felt, your eyes locking with Lucifers, you both leaned into each other, your heads touching, closing your eyes as you began to relax and enjoy the moment, everything feeling so perfect.

You both danced in the air in sync, your steps finally moving as your own, adjusted to the dance, he reeled you out, you spinning out before spinning back in, back into his arms, his wings feathers fluttered gently as you danced in circles, in and out, left and right.

You both leaned out, hands locked as you laughed lightly, making him smile even more that you are enjoying your time with him, he brought you in before spinning you once again, back to him again before dipping you gently, ensuring you won’t fall from his grasp, his eyes were in awe as you smiled, your smile is all he wanted to see after seeing you cry so many endless nights.

He drifted you both back down, the golden lit ducks and flowers following you both as you both twirled around, heading towards the mirror, a trail of ducks and flowers blooming from you both, when you reached the mirror, he dipped you again with one hand this time, his other hand caressing your hair, a soft golden glow luminously flowed in your hair before he gently cupped your face, “until next time, mon chérie.” Lucifer says with a smile and loving eyes, kissing your head lovingly before pushing you carefully into the mirror.

You sit up quickly waking up, the sun shining through your curtains into the bedroom, you looked at your hands, your skin color back to normal, your ball gown gone, ‘it was all a dream.’ you thought, only to frown, believing it was too good to be true, you looked at the mirror on the floor, leaning on the wall as it had always been, you looked at it curiously, you threw the covers to the side, shifting out of bed to walk to it, you picked it up, seeing that your reflection was completely normal, however, a golden lotus laid in your hair, confirming that maybe, it wasn’t a dream after all…

You heard a ‘ding’ on your phone, catching your attention, you put the mirror on your bed carefully, grabbing your phone to look at the notification.

- Hey, that’s a beautiful mirror! It looks super old! antique even! How about $1,500 for it?

You smiled at the notification, that was enough for you to pay most of your bills for this month, you left a response before putting your phone back on your nightstand, picking up the mirror and leaving the room.

- Sorry but I decided not to sell it, thank you for your time though. :]

✧ • ✧ • ✧ • ✧ •✧

thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[gotham-daydreams]

Hi im so sorry if this has been asked before but in your not series, which i absolutely adore by the way, Since Alfred getting the batfam to see the videos and investigate is what kicked the batfam off on their yandere domino effect, what would have happened if y/n kept in contact with Alfred and only Alfred? Maybe giving him little updates, nothing that could really be tracked but enough to tell them how everything is going maybe like through letters with no return address or something. would he still have done what he did? Or would we still have something else to kick the batfam off on their yandere mode, or would they just never realize that the y/n was gone?

Hello!

Considering what happens in the series and everything- I'd say that Alfred still would try to get the Batfam to look for Y/n. Since, well, I'll let you on a tiny little secret; Y/n did sort of do something like that, but its gotten to a point where there is less 'character', and it's more to the point. It's almost as if Y/n is trying to further distance themselves from the family altogether, and I wonder why they'd go and do something like that 🤔

Though- for the sake of the ask, let's say that all of that has yet to happen, and Y/n has been pretty good about sending letters and such. Alfred would be happier than he is in the series, I'll say that much, but ultimately I think he'd still eventually send out the Batfam to look for Y/n.

This is because Alfred wants to talk with Y/n, and I think I may have mentioned this in another ask- but he basically doesn't want to have to further deal with this "one sided nonsense" as I believe I put it. With no return address, or really anything to go off of location wise- even if he did write something back (and he has), then there would be no way he could send it to Y/n. Not to mention that over the months Y/n has been gone did he get more... greedy as he began to miss them.

Yes the letters are nice, and he does deeply appreciate and love how they're trying to keep in contact with him and only him by using such means, but that ultimately isn't enough for him. He wants to talk with them too, he wants to communicate, and most of all- he just wants to see them again. (Which, that in itself includes a bit more than just simply seeing Y/n, but that's for later.)

He wants to be in their presence again, and just... bond and talk with them without the pen and paper. He wants things to go 'back to normal' in that way, since he doesn't necessarily care if Y/n stays in the manor or not (he does, but he can look past it under certain conditions), he just wants to see them. A want which can develop into an obsessive need- kind of like how it does in the series.

Really, the way to have a happy Alfred that won't send the fam after your ass, is to honestly just visit him once in a while. Which, in itself may be a bit hard if you don't like the Batfam, and aren't willing to even risk them seeing you in the slightest, or just generally aren't comfortable in the Manor at this point. But even if it's just helping him out a bit in the garden, or generally with outside work, or sneaking in just to snag a snack he left out, then he'll be a significantly happier camper that won't manipulate and guilt trip the rest of the family to come and bring you back home. Not right away, anyways.

Just make sure he doesn't ever know if you get hurt or something. Especially if you got hurt at home or because of someone close to you. The intention will hardly matter to Alfred, believe me. The happier you keep him, and watch what you say, the less likely it is that he'll begin to start looking for little things that he'll use as reasoning for kick starting the family acknowledging/worrying about you.

Overall, just through letters and essentially one sided conversations, yeah- Alfred will still basically kick start everything.

The little updates and such will be appreciated, and he'll be fine at first, but at some point he's going to get more greedy, and will want to see Y/n. The letters and such won't be enough, and even if he'll still hang onto them, he's too selfish to be fully content with them for long.

So, yeah! Everything still sort of goes down about the same way as the series! :]

I hope this answered your question!

[gojot-t]

Heloooo!

Can i have a 1 second chance romance with topping “I can’t imagine going back to a life without you.” “Then stay.” ?

Name is Sae Itoshi ❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️

from the valentine's day event! ⊹ ࣪ ˖

itoshi sae + second chance romance +"I can't imagine going back to a life without you." "Then stay." ˎˊ˗

tags :: probably ooc sae :(, gn!reader, this doesn't exactly follow the manga, a little angst but overall fluffy yayy, also probably grammar mistakes..

a/n:: anon im so so so sorry for the delay</3 i really hope you will like it nonetheless. on the other hand, this is almost 2k words :o

You remember the first time Sae asked you out.

You both were still children at the time, but in front of the ocean waves and ice cream dripping on the sand, no one had ever made you feel the way he did, so complete and loved.

That day, with the orange of the sunset illuminating his face, you almost thought he was an angel. When he looked at you so intensely and wrapped his hands around yours and whispered those words, like a precious secret between just the two of you, you already knew that he was the one for you.

"When I'm around you, I feel these strange things," he paused as if searching for the right words, "After a while I finally figured out what it was. I like you, I really like you, so... We should just date."

There were no fancy roses or chocolates, just an awkward confession of his way and the childish desire to always be there for each other.

"Dating? Like what adults do?"

"Yeah, like cuddles and stuff..." He looked away embarrassed as he spoke. It was rare to see Sae blush and the sight brought you more joy than you could explain.

"But we're not adults! And we already hug all the time..."

"Whatever, just accept it."

Sae's hands weren't much bigger against yours, but at that moment he felt as if he could hold the world in them.

After that, even though things had changed a bit, it felt natural, a good change. He had treated you well all along, but now he had turned into a complete gentleman. He would insist that you go to all his games to be his "lucky charm" even though he had always said that he didn't need anything but himself to win. "If I see you cheering for me, I'll definitely score another goal."

He would wait for you after school to go for ice cream together, walking hand in hand.

Once you insisted that you play ball together. Despite knowing nothing about the sport, you still wanted to share and support Sae's passion for it, but you just shamefully tripped over the ball and fell flat on your face in front of him, instead of laughing or mocking you, he knelt down beside you so worried that you were surprised. "Are you alright?? Does it hurt?! Do you want me to carry you??"

"I'm fine..."

"Good, don't scare me like that." He had given your knee a little kiss to "heal" and helped you up.

You wish you could cherish moments like that forever and everything was like a beautiful fairytale until Sae was offered professional training in Spain.

He had always loved soccer and that was no secret to anyone, so when the news arrived everyone hugged him and congratulated him. You couldn't have been happier for him and jumping for joy alongside him, despite his usual stoic façade, you knew that he too could barely contain his excitement.

There was just one small problem that you didn't have the courage to point out and apparently, Sae too.

When the day of his departure arrived, your heart was heavy with mixed feelings that you desperately tried not to let show. It was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for Sae, and despite feeling so, so happy for him, when his flight was announced, the curtain of tears in your eyes finally came down.

You expected to meet his angry gaze, for being so selfish and crying at such an important moment for him, but instead you saw kind eyes and a sad smile.

"Don't cry, you look ugly like that."

The tears just fell harder. The hand that had been patting your head moved to your shoulder and pulled you against him.

The sight of you crying for him - because of him - brought an uncomfortable feeling to the pit of his stomach that he couldn't describe, but knew he didn't like. He had no experience in comforting anyone other than Rin, and you weren't Rin, but for your sake he was willing to learn anything.

"You won't forget me, will you?" Your hands grabbed at any piece of him they could reach.

You knew that Sae's family was probably watching the whole interaction, yet at that moment it felt like there were only the two of you in the world.

Sae seemed even sadder. "I should be the one asking this, you know. Don't think you'll be able to get rid of me that easily, I'll still call you every day. There are the holidays too, I'm going to visit at Christmas. Nothing between us is going to change."

You desperately wished it were true, but it never was. Sae didn't come back for Christmas.

The daily calls he'd promised became weekly, stopping only once in a while until you were the only one calling and being answered by the operator's monotone, robotic voice - this number is unavailable. Try again later.

You were worried, then angry with him and then at yourself. You didn't know what had caused the sudden change, so you blamed yourself. No matter how much you wanted to, you had to come to terms with the fact that you'd probably never know if things really could have been different.

Like putting a bandaid on a deep wound, that scar would always be open in you. Sometimes the slightest gust of wind was enough to make it bleed, like passing the ice cream parlor on the corner where you made so many fond memories with him, or Mrs. Sae who still greeted you on the street.

The truth was that the more you tried to forget the boy you handed your heart to on a platter, the more attached you felt to him.

That's why when you saw him standing in front of your door after four long years, you almost thought you were crazy.

With your emotions betraying your reason, you found yourself in front of the ocean waves with Sae again. Your mind has imagined this situation many times and each time you would shout at him, beat your fists against his chest, answer him with the same coldness that he dismissed you from his life, but a simple "Can we talk?" was enough for your determination crumble.

With your arms over your chest – your only armor against the memories that came at you like an avalanche – the dichotomy between the boy with the gentle hands and soft eyes you knew and the man in front of you is so much that it seems to destabilize you.

With his hands in his pockets, Sae almost looks a bit embarrassed. The deja vu of the situation doesn't go unnoticed and you decide to be a little petty and remain silent.

"... Coach said recently that there was still something holding me back in Japan."

"..."

He scratches the back of his neck slightly. "You probably hate me, right? I don't blame you for that... But in the last almost five years there hasn't been a day that I haven't thought about you."

Hate him? You don't think you've ever hated Sae. Sure, there have been times when you've been angry with him, but hating him... You don't think you're capable of it and the thought haunts you. You'd like to hate him.

"..."

He sighs as if he's tired. "This is where it all started, remember?"

"...Just what am I to you, Sae?" You thought your voice would come out as loud as a scream, but only it shakes with anger. "You... You make me think that you're the only one for me and then you leave just like that! Now you come back out of nowhere, what do you think I'm going to do? Crawl at your feet and say I missed you?! Just what I am to you?"

He doesn't seem surprised and this increases your anger even more. There's just one second where only the waves of the sea can be heard.

"There was this one time in elementary school when the teacher asked us what we wanted for the future. You said you didn't know, but as long as you could see me play you'd be satisfied... That's when I realized I was madly in love with you."

His answer catches you off guard, this happened right at the beginning of his and Sae's friendship.

"I'd never had those kinds of thoughts before. Futebol is an individual sport for me, so I thought my life would be like that too. I'd never imagined someone always by my side before, but then you'd give me that stupid smile with that cute little window of yours and suddenly all I cared about was having you with me."

"S-Sae..."

"When I got the offer to train abroad, I wanted to take you with me, but I couldn't... Some things happened there, and I was no longer the same boy you last saw. I didn't want to disappoint you and I didn't have the courage to look at you again, so... I thought it would be better if you just hated me. I was a coward."

He interlaces your fingers against his.

"Despite everything, all this time that has passed and trying to convince myself that things would be better this way... I can't imagine going back to a life without you."

Sobs clog up the words in your throat and even when you try to reply, all that comes out are cries. with your face stained with tears, you're sure that if it weren't for Sae's arms holding you, your knees would have lost their strength a long time ago.

"Sae, Y-You idiot,” you whisper against his chest, voice heavy with the pain of finally knowing the truth. “Coward.."

He hugs you and caresses your head, his touch has never felt so right on your skin - like the missing piece of a puzzle finally falling into place. So many years ago you were the same size as him, but now his shape completely engulfs yours.

"I know, I'm sorry."

"Then stay." He opens his mouth but you stop him, you already know what he's going to say. "It doesn't have to be in Japan... Just with me, just be here, with me."

He rests his forehead against yours and hugs you harder. With a kiss salty with tears, he doesn't need words to seal this promise against your lips. Sae doesn't intend to make the same mistake twice.

[evelili]

I know it’s been ages since I sent one of these, I’ve been busy and I’m still busy so I don’t have time to read the full chapter BUT!! Here’s some of my thoughts and favorite lines from the beginning of this chapter. The Final Trial.

I really love how you write the memory sequences in this story. They all flow really well and don’t feel redundant!! The reveal of these memories twilight has hidden of Luna are so good!! God!! Her devastation when she realized she had forgotten someone as important as Celestia’s SISTER her AUNT is AMAZING!!

-

her hair pulled back into a ponytail, her legs bare below the knees of a ridiculous pink-and-purple skort that she’d have been mortified to wear past puberty—eight or nine, then, she decided. It’s probably summertime, too.

-

God this mental image is so cute!! I had to google what skorts are but yeah they definitely fit Twilight and her character, especially as a kid!!

-

Twilight waited for her younger self to voice the familiar retort she thought she’d known her entire life—magic isn’t real; magic doesn’t exist; magic is fictional and fantastical and lies. But instead of a rational dismissal she heard her voice ask something completely wrong instead:

“You’re really going to show me how?”

And Twilight didn’t hear anything else after that.

-

DAMNNN this sequence is so good!! The way twilights world is just DESTROYED by this is fantastic!!

-

“Well, I wanted to check in on the two of you.” The door swung further open, and suddenly Twilight was face-to-face with the Celestia of her childhood—younger by nearly a decade and yet still recognizable in almost every way. She hadn’t ever thought time had changed her mentor much, but the contrast between present and past was far more blatant when not viewed as a gradual shift. No laugh lines. No grey hairs. No ice in her eyes.

Just a Celestia whose very presence made Someone bristle in response.

-

This description of her is DEVASTATING. She’s both somehow unhappier and so much happier with Luna in her life. The way you write her is stunning and I’m loving the conflict between her wanting Luna to focus on the future and Luna who is focused on enjoying the present. It’s a very cool conflict and I love how you’re handling it!! Them both caring more about twilights emotions than each other’s is heartbreaking

-

It did—to both the Twilight of the present and the past. “Yeah,” she said quietly. “I get it.”

-

Fuck this line is FANTASTIC. The understanding twilight finds in her memories of Luna are fantastic and I’m very curious on how this will impact how she handles Nightmare going forward. Unfortunately I can’t read anymore tonight, but I love it so far!!

STOP THE CLOCK. I FORGOT THIS BANGER LINE: “You believe in magic, Twilight,” she said gently. “And so long as you do, that’s belief enough for me.” The way you write Luna and how much she and celestia both love twilight is DEVASTATING

(combined ur two asks together) WAHHHH thank u so much for the asks!!! and no worries abt taking ur time w the story, u only get to read once for the first time after all!

this chapter is definitely Up There in terms of how happy i am with how it turned out, im rlly glad u liking it so far! i dont know how much i can say without spoiling things, but a reminder to read on fimfic to get the Full Experience (epub missing images my nemesis), a rather important section will b missing otherwise!!

i think to me a big aspect of luna and celestia's relationship in the show that kinda got glossed over was that celestia may not have realized how her actions affected luna until too late. and, it's kind of the "road to hell with good intentions" thing, bc i dont think celestia is the bad guy (at least in tte) for believing that the best way to help someone is plan, prepare, try to think ahead and look forward, etc. but, this kind of mindset can clash with someone who, at that moment, finds the prospect of thinking about the future so impossible. writing from life helped a lot in this regard :)

also, completely unrelated but also related, have a meme :D and thanks again for reading!

[drifloonz]

I also wanna see hcs of Steven with an autistic reader (dating hcs ig, I'm also a Strangled Red simp and I'm autistic)

remember me. im alive . Im here to heal the drought . i am too tired mentally to do the whole format shebang maybe ill dress it up when i wake up ( it is currently 6:21 am for me and im not tired yet )

Actually i dont think i do anything that extra or fancy with my formatting other than the title which i added right now. so . Enjoy

steven x autistic reader!

♡ he's autistic as well ... like that "I hate people" type'a autism. at least nowadays! i think he used to have trouble with volume and tone before the incident and just generally get easily overwhelmed... and either freeze or start to go on a walk to take his mind off of things. stuff like that.

♡ He's also insanely autistic about battle strategies and its his special interest of sorts . like... not that much, he did ( in my interpretation and what is kind of implied? ) sweep everything with miki because she's a special charizard who just kind of. Is stronger in all ways.

♡ BUT! i think i mean this in the more pokeani style of battles - he's crafty and very observant of his surroundings and how to "Cheat" battles with it. wink

♡ anyways yeah autistic reader . hi . You came for dating hcs right .

♡ he tends to just live in his house, lurking, stalking, barely moving out of bed to eat - so you might have to help him with that. ... buuuut, if you're similar, then you two will simply just sit in bed staring at the ceiling all day . napstablook core

♡ he hasn't had much stimulation outside of taking care of his basic needs and like. i'unno. being alive in general. so if you have an interest he isn't too aware of, he's always very happy to listen.

♡ he's an extremely good listener- he'll be nodding and mostly silent, but he may ask questions once he's more comfortable with you. he is actively trying to engage with your interests, although his own autism makes his tone a little stagnant- if he sounds uninterested, it's not intentional. his voice just comes off like that.

♡ he particularly likes games and music although the interests and energy for them have wavered a lot for him personally - so if your interests align with those sorts of things, he'll definitely be on board. you being into something in a genre he used to like definitely gives him enough energy to try again.

♡ this eventually does end up with him having more energy to engage with things that used to give him joy in a similar way . mostly playing games... like, a pokemon stadium or battle revolution game if those existed in-universe? because he can't exactly uh. Battle for real anymore without hurting those around him. of course, he always has charizard on his teams front and center. it's not Her. but, it'll suffice as long as he distracts himself.

♡ truly, it's just like this. introduce things to him and he'll be eager to try or listen or talk to you about them.

♡ if you get overwhelmed anywhere, he is quick to move you out of the area and also maybe take away the overwhelming Element. if it's a person, well. he'll just basically glare at them. a silent 'Fuck Off'

♡ also he will personally appreciate it if you get him more clothes. having just a few sets is fine for his depression, but the more he realizes it, the fabric feels awful sometimes. mainly, his trainer outfit he usually goes outside with - it's very worn and torn and the material was always a little cheap... if you get him a replacement, he'll be all the happier for it.

♡ he'd also give the old one to you if you cared about that sort of thing, but he'd be tentative because. well. it's worn and torn...?

♡ unless you fix it up and sew it somehow. that'd be nice. Im getting offtrack

♡ if you draw, write, or do creative things - he's always happy to see them. he likes to simply wrap his arms around your waist, resting his head on your shoulder as he looks at what you're doing now and again... it's, calming? like, really calming. to be honest, he could do that forever and ever.

♡ until you two get hungry of course. but, until then.

♡ he does also of course engage and ask about things like your OCs ( if you have them ), worlds, writing, dynamics, headcanons - anything, everything.

♡ generally things like this are what he's happiest with . watching something with you or watching you do something as he lays back and relaxes. seeing you enjoy the things you like makes him feel a lot better even though its something so simple .

♡ ... S!3v3n is also similar, he's just much more quiet- basically nonverbal - about how he goes about it. those red eyes will always be watching intently though .

_____

sorry if these were barebones i didnt rlly know what to Go off of but yeah . he is autistic too !!!! the Tismry

[wronglennon]

thank uuuu @menlove and @dykebeatles for tagging me mwah writing tag game lets go

how many works do you have on ao3?

cumulatively over both accounts i have 13, but there are a bunch ive deleted over the years so the actual number is unknown lmao

what’s your total word count?

on takomtrmou it’s 109,153 and on saffrontea its 46,451. my other account is primarily anime/podcast stuff and i havent used it in a while but it was a lot more short form. if you like jujutsu kaisen i have a satosugu fic on there i wrote nearly two years ago now which i still stand by i love you satosugu

top five fics by kudos?

something you can hold on to (satosugu)

stop calling (it’s time to let me be) (satosugu)

if you think you can save me, i dare you to try (satosugu)

there’s a kind of music that reminds me of you (oakworthy)

an improvised guide to co-parenting in the workplace (mythic quest, vaguely braddavid)

do you respond to comments? why/why not?

yeah definitely even if it takes me a bit to get round to them sometimes i try to reply to them. partially because i want to say thank you but partially because when they’re sitting in my inbox it doesn’t feel like i can mark them as seen till i reply lol

what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

it’s between stop calling and if you think you can save me, but i think probably stop calling, just because i think you can save me is a scene that’s also included in something you can hold onto from a different perspective, and that one ultimately has a happy ending. i was very concerned with making stop calling as despairing and hollow as possible.

what’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

thiss is hard because it’s sort of like what quantifies something being happier than something else if it’s just, they both end well. is it that despite the angst the ending is happy? because if that’s the case it’s definitely something you can hold onto. i like the ending to love is a finder as well because it’s just very sweet and i liked writing it a lot.

do you write crossovers?

no, got nothing against them i just have never found two properties that i would be interested in writing one for.

have you ever received hate on a fic?

nooo not as far as i’m aware

do you write smut, if so what kind?

sure if it fits and i want to. most kinds really. i think the smut ive enjoyed writing most has been the trixie katya stuff ive written over the course of this year, esp dead but delicious.

have you ever had a fic stolen?

noooope

have you ever had a fic translated?

noooope

have you ever co-written a fic before?

nah but i would be up for it if its a concept im really into and someone i enjoy co writing with. the concept of the daemon au was very much a split effort between me and james menlove tho so it definitely wouldn’t exist without him.

what’s your all-time favourite ship?

it changes so frequently but ill always have a special place in my heart for satosugu. tragic friends to enemies will always get me and with kenjaku there’s just another element of pain.

what’s a wip that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

ohhhh banana-split lady i fear. i mean never is a strong word but i worry its not in the foreseeable future just because my passion for it kind of petered out, but i do still really love the concept soo maybe someday. just not someday soon

what are your writing strengths?

i have been told that i evoke scenery and emotion pretty vividly which is always so great to hear. more recently with the beatles my favourite compliment is hearing that i get their voices/banter down accurately because its sooo important to me when im reading a fic and its one of my favourite parts to write.

what are your writing weaknesses?

the planning stage definitely. i have a habit of throwing myself into the bit i want to write and then kind of painting myself into a corner when i realise i dont have any ideas for the wider plot. i’m working on it but yeah im a bigggg offender of just making things up as i go which also can lead to losing interest in a piece lol

what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

i suppose i’ve got no issue as long as it’s executed well, and yeah as prev said finding someone who speaks the language is always preferable to just google translating it lmao

what was the first fandom you wrote for?

wrote but not published was doctor who. i was writing self insert doctor who fanfiction from the age of nine. first that i published was voltron and i dont want to talk about that.

what’s a fandom/ship you havent written for yet but want to?

i have a dusty old poison ivy/harley quinn wip that probably i wouldn’t post but definitely piqued my interest in writing them because theyre a lottt of fun.

favourite fic you’ve written?

either something you can hold on to or love is a finder, always! love is a finder is recent but im very proud of how it turned out, and something you can hold onto still stands up remarkably well even tho i think ive changed as a writer quite a lot since i wrote it.

tagging: mmmmm @milfpaul @tritzie @jorkeryuri and whoever else wants to do this lol

[hackauthorairplane]

MY GOOD LADY I BELIEVE YOU’VE GRADUATED WHERE IS THE SHENCEST IDEA!!!!

PLEASE!!!!!

LMAO im just gonna write out my idea bc its too early along to be anywhere near a fleshed out fic:

so first i started with the idea: what if shen yuan transmigrated in way earlier and becomes a qing jing disciple at the same time as shen jiu, and becomes friends with him! He manages to make shen jiu's reputation a LOT better bc shen jiu is a lot calmer/happier, and they are in an happy, established relationship by the time luo binghe would enter the sect.

However, right before the disciple-picking day that lbh would be at (i dont remember the event name tbh), shen yuan is drowning in anxiety. yeah, he knows shen jiu is a different person than he was in pidw, significantly happier/at ease/healthier, but all the same he really really needs shen jiu not to gain the attention of lbh, or vice versa

the plan he comes up with: he will just suck and fuck shen jiu so often, so relentlessly, in so many different ways, that shen jiu will be too busy/tired to focus in any way on shen jiu, and then lbh will get no negative attention!!

but then i had a brain blast. what if it was shencest.

so shen yuan and shen jiu are brothers that went through everything and joined the peak together, and theyre attached at the hip. they love each other very much and having shen yuan around, a loving presence that will never leave him, has made shen jiu's reputation and personality much better!

Theyre pretty codependent, and if you really really get to know them you might realize that theyre kind of weird about each other. they get jealous of the others attention and hate the idea of the other having a romantic partner that could be more important to their sibling than them.

shen yuan loves his brother so, so much (too much), shen jiu is really loving and caring to him, and shen yuan considers him the toughest, best, and most handsome person in the sect. shen yuan can kind of tell that his feelings for his brother are...different than the feelings he had for his original siblings, but he is avoiding that as best he can.

with luo binghe-disciple-time fast approaching, shen yuan is starting to get nervous. How can he make sure that shen jiu doesnt focus on luo binghe? shen yuan's plan comes from his complicated feelings for his brother and the fact he very sleep deprived. for the last year, hes been having nightmares about shen jiu being tortured (and being castrated).

finally, the day before the disciple selection, he jumps his brother. he confesses his non-brotherly feelings for him and kisses him. and then sucks his dick and on and on

the next day, shen jiu just barely makes it to the disciple selection, limping slightly. nyy goes and picks a shidi without being asked bc sj is too out of it, and then when its tea pouring time he has to be nudged into drinking the tea bc the only thoughts running through his mind is "...my brother...my own brother..."

yeah so the rest of the fic is shen jiu going along with whatever deprived shit shen yuan wants. at first he tells himself its bc shen yuan is experimenting and he doesnt want to reject him or hurt his feelings, but as things go on, they both are enthusiastic participants

lqg doesnt die, partly bc sj's cultivation is better with a lack of heart demons (and also bc shen yuan gave shen jiu a lingering kiss on the neck before he entered the cave and shen jiu is running on very competent auto-pilot)

lbh doesnt get pushed, everything turns out ok, and no one finds out about the shencest bc theyve always been super sticky with each other

yeah. that was my idea! idk if ill ever write it a full fic ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[bluegekk0]

im just thinking about my pk, Rymer, meeting yours and just. being both appalled and SO jealous.

you get to give into your instincts??? you get to marry grimm without ppl thinking its weird??? YOU DIVORCED THE WHITE LADY?????

sorry i just. i think its funny lol

Hahaha yeah I think that, despite all, Vyrm got pretty lucky. That's mostly cause I just love him so much as a character and want him to be happy (gives me some hope that my life will also get all sorted out and I'll be happy eventually). Though saying that he's in a perfect situation would also be a bit inaccurate. His life was terrible for at least 3/4 of it, and that just doesn't go away the moment he finds himself in a happy marriage with a family. And I think taking into consideration how all that trauma affects him even now, where he's generally much happier, makes his character that much more fleshed out and interesting, which hopefully isn't just my own view of him.

But yeah if he met a version of PK who wasn't as lucky, it would be quite awkward. Especially since, comparing to many interpretations of the character I've seen, Vyrm's struggles are very different for the most part. And with his poorly masked autism*, he would really struggle to not make things even more awkward. Not to mention, I imagine that if he ever met an alternate version of himself, he would have a very difficult relationship with them by default. There's so much self-hatred in his heart that reminds him of the things he did, and I believe that if he saw another version of himself, it would turn nasty. Of course, he'd eventually come to his senses, especially as he realizes that the other PK is different to him and isn't just an extension of himself to be insulted and hated. But if said PK was more cold and uncaring than him, at least on the surface? Or if he was still trying to excuse his actions with that whole "no cost too great" thing, instead of just admitting he did monstrous things that didn't help anyone? I fear it wouldn't be as pretty, especially since it would also remind Vyrm too much of his version of WL. His self-hatred and all the trauma would combine into a very unpleasant reaction, if not an aggressive one.

Sorry for the longer ramble but I also think this kind of meeting would be very interesting, so I wanted to go over what things would seem like from Vyrm's side haha

Also, Rymer is a very unique name for a PK interpretation, I like it!

* - Funny side tangent about the autism part: many traits that I gave him were peer reviewed as very noticeably autistic by my friends, which wasn't even my intention since I wrote him based on my own experiences/things that I find relatable. Most of my reactions to their comments were along the lines of "wait, really?", since I didn't even realize that was a trait associated with autism. So it really made me take a look back and consider the possibility that I'm also autistic, which wasn't something that I ever really thought about before, but it definitely explained a lot (and still does). Just goes to show how much this character means to me, writing him like this is very cathartic and helped me figure things out about myself.

[lunar-years]

You're a sweet angel for tackling my RKJ reclist ask! I think reading what you said (and izzyspussy's addition about their ideas and what they put in their fic) helped me to clarify what I actually feel. Which it turns out is not so much that the fight itself was my problem, it was more that the fight and aftermath seemed to represent a narrative door-closing that I didn't expect the finale to have - like for me it rewrote this new interpretation of all of canon. It's as if the writers final intention was to say that that they (in particular Roy and Keeley I think in this case) were just fundamentally incompatible, and that everything the show has done with them so far was the story of a doomed trainwreck, that they were always messing it up, all along, and that this was never a relationship that was meant to work out? If that makes sense to you? (I know you don't AGREE, but hopefully the point I'm making makes sense?) That's what it's hard for me to find my way back from, and it's easy for me to end up leaning into it because in retrospect most of their s2 stories are quite fucked up, let alone s3 things. So I think the RK element is actually the toughest factor for me. I also really didn't read Keeley as interested in Roy during 3.11 or the start of 3.12 - it always felt to me like she was going to turn Roy down in Jamie’s room and wasn't happy with how he kept trying to make a move, and she seemed much happier when Jamie was in the mix. And that Roy's comment to Jamie about how he and Keeley were probably getting back together was like... deluded? So I'm definitely interested in the idea of the Jamie and Keeley getting back together first, with Roy having more work to do, so will check that one out first. But yeah, I think your post has made me realize that what my issue is, it's that we've basically got these people who we want to be together and then the show's final takeaway was that actually, we spent 3 seasons watching them basically being in a bad, dysfunctional relationship or ex-relationship. So while I definitely don't vibe with sweeping the fight under the rug exactly, what I actually don't vibe with is the idea of them getting together without tearing their issues apart and putting the relationship back together in a totally new way. Hopefully some of the fics do the trick communication wise. I really appreciate the reclist and the attempt to understand my ask, and I appreciate the additions of the sort of looser options in the hopes that once im sold on it again, I might enjoy some easier-to-please fun stuff! I really hope to read them all, that was a nice idea!

I do agree with you on some of this in the sense that yeah I do think roykeeley was written with the eventual plan to break them up (esp in s2, but obvs there is the parallel moment of their s1 encounter in the car park to Ted and Michelle calling it quits that in hindsight reads as Big Foreshadowing, so maybe it truly was always the intention from the go). And I do agree that their s2 storyline revealed a lot of deeply rooted issues in their relationship (mutual insecurities, bad communication, both of them feeling very adrift in multiple aspects of their lives). I also agree with you that the writers were intending to show Keeley was never going to take him back in Mom City (it's def very clear she was going to turn him down before Jamie walked in), as well as her deliberately steering clear of him in 3x12 to avoid having to have that conversation. Because of all of that I do think she's not interested in getting back together with him at the time we leave her, but I think where I interpret it differently is that I don't see that as meaning she's no longer interested in him. I read her avoidance of him/her shutting him down as more based in confusion and uncertainty than lack of love/interest. And because of that, I see the finale/ending as being totally ambiguous/open-ended in terms of the future of their relationship, as opposed to shutting the door on them entirely.

I think Roy obviously needs to put more work in to gain the communication skills and self-confidence necessary to make that relationship successful, but I also think s3 gave us a great Roy arc culminating with him opening himself up to that growth. He's made the decision to go to therapy, he understands more about who he is and what he wants (the fight being a definite setback, of course, but also the thing that prompts him to take the leap to therapy). It's not perfect, he's sort of stumbling his way along, but he is at least in the right headspace now to put in the work.

And I think in part...that scares Keeley? Like, whereas Roy develops throughout s3 for the better, Keeley is totally floundering. Her s3 arc is one about being utterly lost in life, in her career and her relationships especially. When Jack asks her about ex assuming she means Jamie, Keeley is sort of hit by the realization that she hasn't had even a moment of sitting with any of her prior "failures" or endings before launching into the next thing. Of course she's not processed the end of her relationship with Roy... hell, she's not even processed the end of her relationship with Jamie! And then she launches right into the new thing with Jack anyway because it seems like too much to deal with.

However, by the end of s3 I believe she's at least grown aware that she's sort of trapped herself in this unhealthy cycle of serial monogamy and other patterns of behavior she's avoided addressing in herself because she knows they will be hard to break. There's the sort of pining moments she has over Jamie in s3 that to me are soooo "...what if?" coded, but then she also has so much left unresolved with Roy and is STILL unable to express what she needs and wants from him (as when they sleep together), and then she has the crash of the fallout with Jack, and I think she's come to the conclusion that she's a bit of a mess! Also, she sees that Jamie has changed, that Roy is in the process of change, and it sort of makes her feel like she's the one suddenly in last place. Like she put her all efforts into fixing other people and didn't realize she needed to fix herself, too. So in that sense, i think s3 leaves both her and Roy in a position where they want to do better by themselves first, with an underlying hope that they then may reconnect again in the future in a romantic sense.

I also think I'm maybe in the minority in that s2 made me incredibly ready for roykeeley to break up, because I thought they very much needed that to prompt some realizations about themselves. By mid-s3 I was also actively rooting for them not to be thrown back together at the end, because the slow pace of their individual growth meant that no way were they in a position to make their relationship a fresh success, yet (and actually, I hated how they wrote Keeley's s3 arc, and I think it was a strange choice to spiral her lower in the final season instead of giving her the sort of growth they gave to Roy, so that none of what I wrote about in the prior paragraph is explicitly stated for her. I think that self reflection is there at the end, but it's farrrrr too subtle). Ultimately though, I see all of that and the open-ended finale as MORE hopeful for the future possibility of ot3. They're going to do right for themselves, work to be the people they want to be for one another, finally have the conversations they NEED to have when they are both at last ready to have them, bring Jamie into the mix, as is needed (😁) and do a hell of a lot better when they try the relationship over again! That's the way I see it anyway, as incredibly hopeful and full of possibilities, not doomed.

Anyway, I'm sorry the finale ruined them for you :( For what it's worth, I think "we've got these people who we want to be together, and the show's final takeaway was that actually, we spent 3 seasons watching them basically being in a bad, dysfunctional relationship or ex-relationship," is too cynical! The show's final takeaway to me was that we can all strive to be better for one another and for ourselves. Obviously these three ARE totally dysfunctional at many points of the show (which to me is part of the fun) but they're also trying, and they also ultimately care so so deeply about each other, and that never goes away for any of them. Sure, there are a lot of moments when the RK (or the RJ, or the JK) relationship was bad. But there were also many moments where they were so beyond right for one another, too, moments where they were good. And the promise of the final barbecue scene for me is that there are going to be more of those sorts of moments for the three of them in the future than the bad ones. 💕

[endangered-aquarium-fish]

Gimme ur opinions

theres an ongoing debate about captive bred vs wild caught fish in the hobby and both sides have valid points but personally i always try to get captive bred. but i wanna know what yall think bc i was reading abt cardinal tetras earlier and it made me question that a bit

basically captive bred fish are better adapted in almost every way to aquarium life, generally less likely to carry diseases/parasites, more resistant to sudden changes in water quality like ammonia spikes or pH crashes, tend to be more colorful, aren't a drain on wild populations, and the entire process of how they get to your tank is much more ethical and better for the fish. but they can sometimes be very inbred and all carry the same few v dangerous parasites and diseases if you get them from big factory farms (like guppies and neon tetras which have suddenly gone from super duper hardy to rlly sensitive in the last few years) so you have to be careful where they come from but as long as you are theyre generally better

Wild caught fish are more likely to carry parasites and diseases than most captive bred ones, they're a lot less adaptable to fluctuating water parameters, they may not know how to eat prepared foods, they can sometimes be a drain on wild populations (some species have become critically endangered from overcollection while others seem unaffected by it even when it happens on a massive scale so it depends on the species), and the most important part to me is that the whole process of getting them out of their natural habitat and shipping them across the planet is extremely dangerous and cruel to the fish.

But its more complicated than that- some fish like otocinclus come from pools that dry up seasonally and leave millions of fish to die. So even if the shipping process is horribly stressful and most of them don't survive, they would've suffocated in the forest anyway and those few that do live get much happier longer lives than they would've had. Also, some fish (especially cardinal tetras) are HUGE for local economies. Which normally I'd be like shush that is no excuse at all BUT we live under capitalism and its one of the only sustainable ways for those communities to find a livelihood. So it provides an incentive for them to protect the ecosystem bc without a stable population of these fish they would have no other source of income except for things like logging and poaching endangered species which are far more destructive to the ecosystem than catching the most common tiny fish. so those are the two situations where wild caught starts to seem like potentially a valid and good way to get fish

There's also the issue of the experiences of the fish- like i would imagine a fish that grew up in wide open rivers where it could swim for miles is a lot less happy in captivity than one that's descended from several generations that lived their whole lives in aquariums. ofc thats less true for some than others, like for example apistogramma pairs tend to set up territories in the wild thatre about the size of a medium aquarium and they never leave so im sure they prefer the tank where they get taken care of over living in the same amount of space in the wild but with predators and limited food. but for fish that move around a lot i have a feeling it matters to them

so yeah whatre yalls thoughts about this which one do you generally prefer and are there more nuances that im missing

[petrichoraline]

svt SERVED those mermen, or whatever they were going for, looks. never seen before sways, sauves and smolders. what did you like most about the mv?<3

aaaaa I'm so happy to see you in my inbox, hii🥰

this is long and rant-ish, i apologise <33

what WERE they going for, the cave and ocean scenes lead to mermen but the tarot concept was so detached from that..though if you think about it, if we're talking sirens I guess it all ties in together with the spell concept?

serve is an understatement, like you could put an idol in an outfit but you cannot make them WEAR the outfit the way it deserves to be worn. that jun fit (I can't find any gifs from the mv in the search bar yet) was made that much better because he knew how to pose and move to its benefit

chan absolutely left me speechless at his part and that outfit (though not smth im personally that big a fan of) created the interesting imagery to catch the attention which he had the task of keeping on himself AND KEEP IT HE DIDD

idk why im so happy with hao's tie dye shirt, tank top and loose pants combo, might be because it's different than the other flashy and intricate pieces or because he reaallly suits flailing oversized shirts. who knows :]

hoshi pulling out those wings had me like oh! I didn't know we were doing angels as well?? hahah, honestly I think the one thing that made me a bit uncomfortable was hoshi having a serious face on for the entire mv lol like he has the smoldering gaze and the sad expressions and I couldn't pinpoint it until now but I'm not used to seeing him like this for a whole song.. that being said, amazing presence as always

I'm still crazy about the outfits and omg the accessoriesss and jun's earring being the centre of a shot, insane

genuinely can't tell you which part is my fave because I watched it only once, I don't know what to do with myself. you know that feeling where something is so amazing you need to talk to someone about it (like quite literally yell and shake them) that watching it alone without the possibility to do that is too much..yeahh

I'm scrolling through hoshi's stories rn and a snippet came up and I started fangirling again 😮‍💨 ALSO he posted smiley photos and im laughing cause all is right again!! sorry that I can't post ss rn

I have to say my mouth was agape with the jun and hao shot, the props, the heart, the colours..beautiful, I love practical effects (if you can call it that?)..the shot of jun laying on the beach is so peaceful, I loved that as well

EDIT: I just watched it again.. im heated from punching the air im so hyped its insane

thing is this mv made me like so many things I usually don't enjoy for reasons beyond my understanding like icy landscapes.. I have some questions about the combo of sets but it's okay

turns out they all had the more casual fits as I suspected, it's just that hao had a parallel shot with jun in his slay coat-y fit

(I just realised how good joshua would look in this makeup...everyone else too oh my goodness now im even happier we got this..and also I wonder what they did for vocal team's mv)

honestly i started rewatching and went "it's gonna be most of the scenes, isn't it..yeah this one..and this one too..this one is also amazing" like I can't pick a fave 🥹💗 songwise, I loveee the spell part but that is also related to the fact I was already in need to get my energy out somehow and it gave me a reason to, it's so fun lol

please tell me what part you liked!! ☺️ i thought I was more normal about this but apparently nahh

[sukirichi]

Holy shit. Im usually at work when you post the updates so i got quite the scare when i saw your tag. I legit believed today was monday 😭😭😭

Dhshdhbsbbabbfbsnna in a way im so happy we're with rin but it breaks my heart how he keeps trying to push us away thinking we would be happier without him and how scared he is that we'll despise him later on for choosing him

😭😭😭😭 Baby, rin ill never despise you, love your stubborn ass too much

Team rin till the end uwu

The part where he thought we wanted to have sex made me snort so loud 🤣🤣🤣 poor baby, waking up to that 🤣🤣🤣

Kinda annoys me we keep saying 'that we' re leaving cause he's the only thing we have now' i understand his reaction its like we're saying 'oh if we had a choice we wouldnt pick you' i know we genuinely picked him and we even tell him but the insistence of keeping on saying 'because youre the only thing i have left' doesnt sit well with me

Also sorry omi stans but i felt absolutely nothing seeing him crushed and crying. I agree with the person that said it was really toxic of him saying rin never loved us and even 'manipulative' to an extent when he truly didnt know what was going on in rin's head and heart. So he can suffer a bit too 🙄

Hope he has his closure of wtv 🥱 i just want a happy ending with rin 🤣🤣🤣🤣 where we can finally have a genuinely calm happy life even without riches. Just us, rin kids (since he wanted some) and a dog (cause he also wanted one and honestly im more for the dog than kids ahahahha) like i dont need wealth just rin uwu

AFGHJKAA I get the confusion, I don’t even follow with my schedule anymore either because life’s just out of control *sobs* LMAOOO rin thinking we randomly wanted sexy time even after running away from the cops and him being game for it was like the only lighthearted scene in that chap AGHJSKA. and oooohhh that quote… I think we said that to reassure him that we do value him, like he’s still important to us and because he’s the only thing we have left, we’ll cherish him even further because we can’t afford to lose one more thing that’s precious to us </3 (in all honesty tho!! you’re right lol. if the situation had been different and if we had a choice, we probably would’ve still chosen kiyoomi if it meant rin was still safe. but he wasn’t. so.)

AS A KIYOOMI DEFENDER let me clear my man’s name HAHAHHA he said rin didn’t love us because to him, that’s not how love should be!! kiyoomi is a very simple guy. if you love your partner, you would never lie to them or cheat on them or do anything that you know would hurt them!! if you do any of those things, then maybe you didn’t love them at all – that’s how kiyoomi thinks, but you’re right, he didn’t know what was going on in rin’s heart. and YES rin did love us despite being horrible. he isn’t a black and white character at all. but yeah omi deserves his closure!!

[evildoombringer]

hi nakamura (i'm. not entirely sure which name you prefer to go by,,)

i. don't really know, personally, the depths of hurt that came from min leaving can't claim either. to understand what your going through right now

you both seem really close. it was always funny, to  read ur asks that you'd send i remember reading the "happy morning" one you sent and it had like this image of a smiling kid for some reason, for like a solid 5 months i just thought "oh cool, so that's what they look like:0" before i looked back and thought, "huh wait. they always added (very funny,  mind you) meme/pics to their asks. was that pic a meme too-?" and only then did i realize lmao

looking back on his responses, i can almost hear the amused tone or, however min would react. lol it was nice to see him talking to people who cared about him

im. not really sure what to say, without coming off as like.. pretentious.? but. if i can just assume for one second, from the asks they'd answer of yours, to everything i hear about min from all the people who know him, i. i. assume he really cared for you, and. i assume you cared for him as much.,

i dont. know your situation, at all. min had. already made up his mind when i even found his blog. so, just. i hope you'll be able to make a decision, you'll be. happy with

the future could get better. it could get worse i can't really see which one it'll be. i don't understand how close you and min were, at all but know. you arent alone im not sure, if you need to. understand or know someone to be there for them,but from the looks of it, min was. never really alone if he had you. so,i hope you also know your not alone there'are people here for you

im sorry. this is probably, meaningless to you in hindsight i just. yeah. in the end, whatever you choose is your decision but. your not alone im sorry if this comes off as assuming.  please. feel free to ignore this ask, if it oversteps in anyway or is just uncomfortable. i know sometimes one might just want- to vent and let it all out and the to have that acknowledged or responsded to might be. uncomfortable i. hope i didnt come off that way

but .yeah,

nice to. meet you by thw way. O(∩w∩)O (im sorry the kaomoji is so out of place jhsjsh i just remembered that one ask u sent hh)

hi custard

it hurts that he's gone, obviously, and i just haven't been on Tumblr for a minute, so seeing everything again is having a terrible effect on my psyche (ill live though haha). im just super weird about him and i realize that uhh nobody really knows that. but I'm super . . weird about him and uhhh yeah and um i regret everything lol

im surprised you thought i was a young chinese boy :sob: but. i understand how you could make that.... mistake.....

did you know the :smile: :sob: thing is a discord reference? :sob: is 😭 and :grimace: is 😬. if you're on a phone and u type the emoji out it should probably pop up, and the same thing happened on discord so he. um would do that when posting on Tumblr too out of habit, and i guess it eventually became a Min-Pal staple haha

and yeah he definitely cares about me, and im mad at him because he cares about me and left me his emails and shit to take care of and he did that because he knew im. weird and needed more than old messages and tumblr posts and i . m glad he did do all that and i love having some stuff to hold onto like his Spotify but. it's just upsetting i guess, since you know, id rather have him.

its really funny seeing how other people view him, to me, at least, i guess since i got to see not just him being bad-pathetic but him bad-bad in general (and I'm not going to explain further than this, as i, despite claiming to find it funny, am happier than not that he died with a t least a somewhat positive. Uh. Perception.)

idk I'm not like, a great persoj, and i did Just let him die instead of going to unimaginable lengths. and I regret that everyday, but he was so steadfast. he just didn't care anymore , and he had me to talk to but it was like he didn't care about trying (because once he decided he'd died, what really mattered past that?) Ssorry this is all so congested and contradictory and I make no sense

and, id love to believe you when you say stuff like "you're not alone" but it's terrible because I really am. like it's out of personal fault, but even the people I feel as though I could go to for help, I coukdnt bring myself to,, not when it's anything Too serious,, not to mention the fact I just got dumped because he said I was 'unhealthy' (after 10 months of reassuring me that its ok if I am cuz he'll help... but that's. A whole different thing and has nothing to do with min and I'm just bitter and bringing him up out of.... bitterness.)

and im glad u left the ask mikey i really am

idk it's just kinda sweet. now I feel more like angel and saki..... Auuuhhuhhh

i don't know what to do in any regard currently though so I think I'm just gonna continue mourning something that's been gone for a year now. Someone. and being bitter and upset, and reminiscing and trying his memory into music I like (and emailing my bf. [not considering him an ex] [email cuz he blocked my number] obsessively until he decides to take me back)