#and yeah i think him and mai would break up coz they never really loved each other

[coralpaperthoughts]

can we all agree, as a collective, that the comics aren't canon and the live actions are just remakes of the Ember Island Play episode?

[xanfeursel]

for the dark urge ask game, 1 10 11 21 for lophi and 6 7 21 30 for vyper?

HAHA... YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

for this ask game

lophi questions:

1. What circumstances led to your Dark Urge becoming their Class/Subclass?

so, lophi's a bard, and i have this tied very much into her durge-isms. music was something she was always very passionate about as a child, and her first violin was a gift her foster parents had worked very hard for her to get. however it seemed that bad luck would follow her whenever she'd play, as much as she adored to. at first it was inconsequential things, like things falling or breaking while she'd practice.

until that eventually evolved into her music causing others to get violent, almost as if she was puppeteering them to cause their own demise, if that makes sense. like a fucked up pied piper. essentially what i'd assume bhaal's version of a bard would be. as she grew older and fit into her role as a bhaalspawn this would be a skill she'd learn to harness much more carefully, often posing as a humble street performer who'd be the single onlooker of episodes of mass hysteria around baldur's gate. something like that :-)

she also ends up as a college of swords bard, if only so that she can still cause some bloodshed by her own hands.

(putting the rest under a cut because otherwise this post would end up long LOL)

10. What motivates your Dark Urge to either embrace or resist the tadpole? 11. What motivates your Dark Urge to either embrace or resist the Urge?

answering both of these because they both play into the same element of lophi's character-- her need for control over herself. she doesn't even dislike the idea of killing, she just wants to be certain what she does is out of *her* own accord. not some dream visitor's, not some voice in her head telling her to kill.

she may not know much about her own self, but she knows enough that she doesn't like feeling like she's only serving as someone's puppet.

21. What are 2-3 songs that your Dark Urge would relate to?

LOVE THIS QUESTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! using it as an excuse to share songs from her playlist. and share the lyrics that relate to her as well

Marionette - Scarlet Room

In a quiet heart Of a quiet wooden girl There's an imaginary box But it screams I am so sick of this world It owns me I am so sick of this world And she sings

2007 - You Love Her Coz She's Dead

Bang, bang goes a bullet to my head But it's already been eighteen minutes since I've realized I was dead Yeah, okay, so I've made a few mistakes in my life But I never knew they'd force me to pay such a heavy price

Flight of the Crows - Jharia

Well, I think that I've gotta go, and I don't know why But I need you to promise that you won't cry 'Cause you'll be fine, and so will I So just let me out of your mind In the morning you'll learn I disappeared off into the night so quietly That your love for me will vanish too

vyper questions:

How does your Dark Urge react to waking up with memory loss?

god. he's like a lost dog. he's desperate to find answers and just some sliver of familiarity. he believes himself to be a paladin, and plays the role of one as such, but he doesn't even know what god he was devoted to, if he ever had any. this was a whole thing for vyper especially in act one. it's why i like to think he had some form of admiration for shadowheart before really learning about what being a shar follower entails. he admires how strong her faith is despite being in a somewhat similar position to his own.

Did your Dark Urge recall any childhood memories? If yes, how do they feel about the revelations? If no, was it by choice or lack of options?

i think he gets the odd feeling of deja vu, but never anything concrete. it eats him up inside. he wishes he could recall Something, as he does with his memories just in general, though sometimes he thinks if theyre ever worth recalling at all with the image he's built up of who he once was. it's rough!

What are 2-3 songs that your Dark Urge would relate to?

another excuse for me to share playlist music... teehee ^_^

Howl - Florence + The Machine

A man who's pure of heart and says his prayers by night May still become a wolf when the autumn moon is bright If you could only see the beast you've made of me I held it in, but now it seems you've set it running free The saints can't help me now, the ropes have been unbound I hunt for you with bloody feet across the hallowed ground

Animals - Stomach Book

Pray for a change A cocoon about to break But now, you feel strange And the wings started to take shape Eat and then die All your siblings cast aside, too See with new eyes A world ready to despise you

Futura - Vylet Pony

Is it so sinister to draw blood for it? The future is now, the torch is lit Can it all fall in so neatly? Can we coexist? How can I have faith that no flower will be missed?

What are your Dark Urge’s intentions/goals after the end of the game?

i'm still midway thru act 3 with vyper, so i'm still brainstorming ideas in my mind... i plan for him to re-awaken his oath when he finally breaks away from bhaal though, or perhaps take an oath of devotion instead. something along those lines.

he wants to be able to give this whole paladin thing a real shot, and turn his craving for violence that, while a lot quieter now- i don't think ever permanently goes away, into something more constructive for himself.

he learns that he does not have to atone for the pain he's caused, but rather make a new better way for himself.

AND THATS EVERYTHING... I THINK . THANK U SO MACH FOR ALL THESE QUESTIONS

[luckyqueenreign]

major 🤡 alert!

Hey, HELP A GIRL OUT PLEASE i’m stuck in the love triangle with Suresh and Alfie. I KNOW! I’M DOWN BAD BUT hear me out. I actually really liked Alfie in the beginning and wasn’t even thinking about Suresh (hated him to be exact) but we all know what happened how the season progressed. Plus i’ve been reading y’all’s theories and everything on here and yeah that resulted in this. I literally tried to make myself hate Suresh over the past two months so bad but god dammit i just can’t do it 😭Every damn time when i was finally like okay there’s no way i’m taking him back (especially after i found out about Gabi coming in, their relationship and him switching to Lulu from the scripts) i open tumblr AND IT’S BACK AGAIN. Alfie looked like a way better option to me even after kissing Kat but recoupling with Meera after Casa was my last straw. Suresh on the other hand… we know damn well what was happening in the last 2 months. We all figured that in this season we simply gotta pick the least bad option so i feel like they’re both as bad as each other and i just don’t know who to go for. Plus their routes are literally 👏mirroring👏.These theories about them feeling like they don’t deserve MC break my heart even though they did her well dirty. Final recoupling is probably about to be next week and i’m over here on the biggest fence ever. I know it’s probably not a good idea asking this here (where a lot of Suresh stans are) but i would be beyond grateful if you could look at it objectively and try to find some advice 😭coz i’m dying over here. Thank you so much for reading this, have a nice day! <3

OK girly i'm going to try soooo hard to be impartial but I'm so not an Alfie girl so this may prove difficult for me 😩😬.

I also want to preface this by saying that when I was coupled with Alfie I took full advantage of that coupling to make Suresh jealous and I actually did start to like him. I found him super endearing and I felt bad that I was going to break his little heart...that is until he Cherrygated me 😡. And look did I kiss Suresh? Yeah I absolutely did! But Alfie wouldn't even wait two seconds to hear me out. And I've seen other girls post on here who did NOT kiss Suresh and when you didn't kiss him you had an option to tell Alfie nothing happened and he still didn't hear you out. BOO!!! I just also feel like with Alfie some of his words and actions don't line up. He tells you one day he wants to take things slow and the very next day is asking to do bits? He tells you two days in row he wants to end the summer with you, you're his only girl but then he kisses Kat and 2 days after that brings Meera back and is suddenly all about Meera. IDK for me... There just hasn't been enough of a redemption arc for Alfie like there has been for Suresh. And I'll get into his misgivings now. Suresh comes into the villa incredibly unapologetic and extremely cocky. It's clear he thinks that he's got this in the bag and he's going to win MC back, that these guys have absolutely no chance. But MC proves to be a bigger challenge than he originally anticipated and he's forced to deal with ALL of his demons. Suresh thinks he's changed before Arlo comes in but he obviously hasn't hes still acting the exact same way he was before. MC kisses/flirts with Alfie? He does the same with Arlo. He flirts with MC while with Arlo, which in it of itself is a dick move to both women (I mean I loved it...but im being impartial here It was a dick move) Then the whole casa speech. We all loved it but then NOTHING. We were all left scratching our heads confused like WTF happened to this man?? We all came up with theories to explain his odd behavior after Casa but then this week he confirmed our suspicions that he was hurting, he was struggling hard, but most of all he was SORRY. This man has never been this apologetic, this self-loathing without wanting anything in return. this man has properly changed, there's been growth and character development (I mean as much as there can be for a pixel game). I just dont feel like we see the same for Alfie.

But again take this info knowing I am not an Alfie girly. You may find an Alfie girly out there who will give you 845 reasons why he's redeemable and has had growth. 💖

[erodasfishtacos]

Just an idea for a concept but no pressure: cheating harry and y/n just finished having sex and they are cuddling (u know being all cute and I love) and Anna turns up at Harry’s door seeing if they can hang out coz they never do and he wasn’t answering his phone and she tried to just walk into his place like he did when she turned up and they were watching that movie (I’m not sure of the name of the concept) and he had to force her to stay outside and it’s really angst between them coz she gets really suspicious but eventually leaves and he just goes and cuddled in bed with y/n and they laugh about it

Disruptions

warnings: cheating, smut, brief mention of domestic violence, panic attacks, this could just be overall triggering if you have experienced trauma or family struggles.

if you enjoyed this blurb - PLEASE reblog, rec, like, and come chat with me about the fic!

—

“Puppy, yeah,” Harry murmurs encouragingly, she was almost there and she looked like an angel in the low light, “Y’look so pretty, give it t’me.”

YN whines in the back of her throat, her hips were slowly rolling forward as she sat atop of him - trying milk that friction of her clit.

“Sweet thing, c’mon,” Harry goads, gripping her waist with strong hands to speed up her languid rolls as he wants her to finish before him.

“Close, H,” YN sweetly chirps, letting him lead her motions until she’s halting and throwing her head back in bliss, lips parting and eye squeezed shut.

“There y’go, good fuckin’ girl,” He praises her before giving two more pumps before he’s releasing right after her.

As he is in the midsts of his orgasm, he hears a quiet ‘I love you’ from above him as she rubs at his chest as he rides it out.

Harry could have heard that whisper from across the fucking ocean, it has him sitting up and pulling her into a hard kiss before babbling against her sore lips.

“Puppy, I love you. You’re so perfect for me. Y’don’t even have t’wonder why you’re the only one I give it to,” He tells her confidently, panting against her mouth.

She doesn’t say anything but her smile is enough for him, he carefully pulls out and flips her on her back before grabbing a towel and wiping her down with adoration deep in his bones.

When she had just curled in to his side, pressing her bare chest against his warm skin, he kisses the top of her head, “You’re my favorite person, y’know that?”

“Harry,” She says, barely above a whisper with her face nuzzled in tight - shying away from what she really feels.

“Please baby,” He replies softly, she knows what he asking for and she will never say no to him when it comes to this.

“I know. I love you s-so much.”

“Whoa, pup. Don’t cry,” Harry chuckles sweetly, “I know, I know you do. Believe me I do.”

She nods, sniffling, she sometimes get emotional after they had intimate slow sex as opposed to the high intensity, lust-driven kind.

It’s quiet as Harry scratches up and down her back, soothing her like he always has and always will, no matter what.

He always finds inner peace when her breathing slows and her facial features relax - all worries and anxiety disappearing.

She had just let out a light snore when he hears a banging on his front door, loud and insistent, and it has YN sitting straight up in bed.

“Wha-Harry, I-who?” YN stammers, her chest starting to heave as she begins to panic from the sudden noise.

-

“Harry, you have to leave,” YN whimpers, the knocking deafening on the front door, “My mum locked him out and he’s going to break it down.”

“I’m not leaving you here alone!” He hisses back, standing up and locking her bedroom door, “Let’s go sneak out the window to my house.”

—-

Harry’s automatically furious with whoever it is, the love of his life triggered as he just knows she’s reliving one of her awful memories.

“Sweetheart, please breathe. S’okay, you know I’d never let anything hurt you. Never have, never will,” Harry coos, he’s standing up to walk to his closet, reaching up for the weighted blanket he keeps for her. “I’m gonna go see who it is.”

“Y-you can’t! You’ll get hurt! Don’t, please,” she begs, eyes wide in fear for him and his safety as she pants.

Harry wraps her like a burrito in the blanket before looking her firmly in her eye, “Remember what your therapist said for when you’re panicking. Do that, please baby.”

She searches his eyes before hesitantly letting hers close, focusing on her breathing and imaging a happy place away from here - a meadow with Harry is what she likes to think about.

Harry slips on his briefs and athletic shorts with annoyance - well absolute rage really. He’s stomping down his stairs with loud steps.

He whips open the front door to see Anna standing there with a pursed look, “Oh, look! So you are alive! What a miracle.”

Harry automatically glares at her, “It’s past bloody midnight, what are you doing here?”

She scoffs in disbelief, “You ditched me tonight! You were suppose to come to the bar with my friends and I! And then you just never answered your phone.”

Yeah, well he had forgotten because YN wanted to watch a new movie and he could never say no to YN.

“I fuckin’ forgot, shit,” Harry huffs, not moving aside to let her in as she steps forward.

“Well, I came over so we could hang out,” Her voice mellowing out a little bit, features softening as she reaches out to stroke his bicep.

All he could think about was his afraid little love upstair using her coping skills to deal with the panic Anna had set off.

“Why would I want to hang out at fuckin’ two-thirty in the mornin’?” Harry replies blandly, like she’s an idiot.

“We could cuddle? Watch a movie?” Anna suggests with a shrug, attempting to giving him a coy look, “Fuck?”

They’d never even done anything apart from a few pecks.

“S’late, I’m too tired for this bullshit.”

“How is that bullshit? It’s so fucking annoying Harry! I know if you’re little bitch of a friend wanted to do that you would!”

She was completely right.

When he hears the vulgar name being thrown at YN, he grits his teeth and says, “Watch your fuckin’ tone, I’ll text y’tomorrow, okay?”

“Fine,” Anna surrenders angrily, turning on her heel and storming back to her car.

Harry slams his door shut so she gets the hint but then automatically feels regretful as he knows it didn’t make YN feel any better.

When he goes up to the bedroom, she’s not in the bed, and Harry hears the shower going so he’s stepping into his bathroom.

It’s a glass door and he can see the beautiful form of her from behind it. There’s not steam in the room because he knows the water is cold.

Not ice cold but barely warm.

When the imagery and breathing didn’t help, usually a cold shower was next, and Harry carefully slides open the door.

“Hi baby,” He murmurs, keeping his eyes on hers and nowhere else - not wandering or curious like they’d be if she was okay.

“Hi,” She answers shakily, her eyes were a bit swollen and puffy but she was giving him a smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

“Do y’need anythin’?”

He wasn’t going to ask to come in because it wasn’t about him.

YN nods, “Will you come hold me? I-it’s cold so if you don’t want to-“

He’s already stripping, he’s hold her in the waters of Antarctica if she asked - he was so bloody gone for her, past the point of self-preservation.

Harry’s wrapping her up in his arms, trying to hide his grimace at the cold stream - colder than her usual but she rarely gets woken up like that.

Therapy had been doing wonders for her.

It may seem like it’s still an intense reaction but it had improved so much from where she had started before the help.

—

Harry had a key to her apartment and he had texted her multiple times that’s he was coming over but she must have forgotten.

She was cleaning her kitchen when he opened the door.

Luckily, he managed to duck as a plate comes hurling at him. This wasn’t the first time it’s happened - not close.

As it hits the wall and shatters, he looks up to find her guiltily meeting his gaze before mumbling out an apology.

He steps over it, meeting her in the kitchen, and kissing her nose, “S’okay, y��didnt get me. I just wished you weren’t so scared, pup.”

—

“It was Anna,” YN states against his damp skin.

“Yeah, I ditched her and she was pissed,” Harry shrugs, unbothered and coldly uncaring about the situation.

“Mmm,” She acknowledges lowly, her hands snaking around his waist.

“Please.”

It was simple, YN knew what he was asking.

Please let me break up with her.

It hurt YN just as much when she couldn’t do anything but shake her head ‘no’ and swallow harshly.

—

Whew doggy. Thoughts?

[tundrainafrica]

Why I love LeviHan (a rant)

So I'm pretty new to the LeviHan community and I just wanted to rant about how much of a work of art this fucking ship is even though I have no idea whether Isayama did it on purpose or not. But damn, this ship literally introduced me to the drama of shipping fluff and AUs --- two genres I used to avoid like the plague because never have I felt such adamance for a ship to set sail in YEARS since Percabeth back in high school.

To give some background about myself, the past five years, I was no fan of ships. Like literally, I tried to avoid shipping fics like the plague (for any fandom) because I was like "come on war racial war, zombie like monsters? Who has time to fall in love?" A lot of non romance shows don’t leave time for a relationship to develop and we literally just get a time skip where suddenly they pair people up together and I’m like woop good story but yo how the heck did they end up together.

In real life, I also did get into a healthy relationship with a guy, a slow burn after five years type and I thought yeah I've seen how I want a relationship to develop and now imma be picky as fuck with ships.

I did end up picky as fuck with ships but Isayama with the minimal screen time he actually gave this ship to set sail with probably minimal intention to actually confirm their ship got me climbing into this ship while it sunk canonically after chapter 132 because holy fuck ISAYAMA YOU MAD MAN.

Let's talk about how they were introduced. Trost is destroyed. Titans are impossible to kill then whoop. We get a group of weirdos and outcasts who can somehow kill titans like crazy.

Strong titan slayer dude.

Strong titan slayer girl. (Hange is female to me.)

Cool commander dude.

Cool interesting characters. Eren's dream team since episode 1. Two captains. Constantly together. Erwin is their glue. Nothing suspicious about that. They work together. They're too busy fighting Titans to actually be considering a relationship right??

Besides, Hange and Levi are just way too different like

Levi is like *slash slash slash I hate titans u ugly* *slash slash slash eww titan blood* *slash slash slash kill Titans they're all monsters* 

Hange is like *slash slash slash oooh titan blood* *slash slash slash dont kill them i wanna dissect them* *doesn't slash* titans make me horny.

Like sure we could argue opposites attract but there are more cases where opposite personality dating would probably backfire and with the idiosyncrasies of both parties at polar ends of the spectrum it just didn't seem possible for there to be a spark? Like logistically they would tear each other's hair out if they were stuck together in a relationship.

At that point, Erwin being the middle ground between both captain weirdos, I couldn't help but think shipping Erwin with either of them would have been the more realistic option.

Season 2 had its fair share the first two scenes with Levi picking her up and the carriage. Didn't see anything too sparky yet and yes the last scene where he could tell who she is by her knock. (but yes sparks flew in hindsight).

Season 3: Erwin the glue gets trapped in capital due to political reasons and only one arm. Two captains forced to combine forces to manage the survey corps in peril. They get their bonding moments like torturing some dude together and reflecting over the untimely deaths of Hange’s squad. (and maybe Levi’s squad too)

They separate while coup d'etat happens because their skills were needed elsewhere. They got to save Eren and like hours later in the cavern Levi was especially concerned about Hange when she got shot by the hook back in the cavern like you don't see that concern with any other character except maybe Erwin. (But it can be argued that maybe all the other people he ever loved died too fast he never got the time to be concerned.)

All the way until the battle of Shiganshina Levi is usually with Hange.

When he’s not with her, there’s a reason (usually Erwin’s orders.)

When he's not with her he's thinking about her.

Then Erwin their magical glue of a commander does die and the captains gotta stick together even without the glue because they're the last two surviving people in the old survey corps.

It's apparent Levi hates the changes made to the survey corps because he still keeps the green cloak which everyone kinda abandoned. So it can be argued that Hänge was also that last bit of fresh air Levi had of the olden days.

So

they're

together

in

almost

Every

Friking

Scene

Like you can't blame them. Levi is anti social and traditional survey corps type.

Hange is still reeling from the loss of Erwin and her quick rise to power as commander.

They may have differing personalities but they had the same history. They both know loss, bloodshed and battle the survey corps brings that no one else probably understands to the extent they do.

And we get the bombshell of this scene.

Hange literally proposes to him that they just run away to the forest and just build a life for themselves and the cold harsh brazen Levi doesn't outright reject it.

He instead acknowledges what he knows about her that she'll never do that. This only confirms that they know each other too well, that they have a bond that exists between them which cannot so easily be replaced by anyone else.

And then a few chapters later

Dead.

And sure yeah Levi didn't cry but like yo, the way Levi handled her death is worse than crying. We have never seen Levi react to a death like this.

Levi is holding on to the hand which touched Hange’s.

Levi just sits down in the middle of a pivotal scene and where he might end up fighting any minute coz like what's life he literally lost everything he could have lived for.

Like sure people who don't think LeviHan is canon would say “He’s injured. He’s tired.” 

Just a few chapters ago though we got him ready to fight

 "That’s the last person left of course it would break him more than anything"

That's the point. They're complete opposites they've been together for years and even if the chemistry wasn't there before, even if they would never have gotten along at all, personality and logistics-wise, they were placed in a situation where their glue Erwin died, everything of the life they knew before, all their loved ones in the survey corps died and now they were left with the responsibility of managing what's left and being the only two people with a shared history.

That literally set up one of the best places for a fucking romance to bloom. Yet the war and the circumstances just made it so hard for them to act upon it yet somehow the manga and anime were peppered with this cool understanding of

Yo I want you.

like maybe when we retire let's keep in touch and I dunno have babies or something

But yeah yo we gotta fight.

Then Levi be like “Yeah babies be a good idea?” (Titans don’t love you. I love you.)

Death foreshadowing

Then Levi

Is

Fucking

Broken

Like we've never seen him before.

Wow isayama the madman didn't need to build this masterpiece of a relationship from love at first sight, to confessions, to placing them in unnatural situations for sexual tension.

He built a subtle relationship out of necessity, out of the need for some humanity in this dark world. Two people placed at the lead at the forefront of this war, willing to adjust, willing to change and work despite their differences because they needed that warmth, they needed the reminder that there exists happiness and hope in this world which transcends all that bullshit they have experienced to that point until her death.

I really wish I could experience that epiphany again with another couple.

I applaud the subtlety of this relationship and the natural development of one of the best ships I have experienced in a long while.

[lucifermorningstark666]

Hello there-3😈( Lucifer x reader)

Hi darlings,

Please note that this is the third and final part of the chapter Hello there. Do let me know what you think about it. Please hit the like, if you enjoyed this piece of mine..❤. You can also find this on Wattpad( Megalomaniac_123, Book name: Y/N's Handsome Devil)

🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩

Maze showed you around LUX and gave you all the monetary transaction papers of LUX. You completed your accounting work and called Lucifer to ask regarding the lunch.

" Hello Lucifer, I have completed my work...shall I head to the restaurant or will you come to LUX now and we'll go together." You asked.

" Y/N, darling. I'll be arriving at LUX within 5 minutes and we'll go together in my Corvette" Lucifer said.

" OK, Lucifer. I am really excited." You said in a cheery tone.

" Me too, darling." Lucifer replied.

Lucifer arrived at LUX and you both headed to the restaurant in his car.

" Lucifer, I think all the tables are occupied. I can see people waiting outside" You said.

" Oh, not to worry, darling. I already made a reservation for two." Lucifer smiled at you.

" Oh...thank you, Lucifer." You said and returned a smile.

"No problem, darling. Anything for you." Lucifer smiled.

Lucifer had reserved a table facing the sea-side.

" So Y/N, how was the work today?" Lucifer asked.

" It was fine, Lucifer. I enjoyed every bit of it and well, Maze helped me a lot and showed me around LUX." You said with a small smile.

" I am very glad to hear that, darling. You must also have fun..OK.. doing work all the time makes humans boring...and I don't want you to be like that. And, if you need any other requirements you can ask, Maze" Lucifer said.

" Thank you, Lucifer" You said with a sweet smile.

" So..um..what do you want to have?" Lucifer asked.

" ( Favourite food) and ( Favourite drink)" You said.

" Great taste you have got, darling. I'll also, have that." Lucifer said.

Lucifer called the waiter and placed the order.

" So..um...do you have a boyfriend, darling?" Lucifer asked.

" No..Lucifer. I am single." You chuckled.

" Well that's great!..It's also very hard to believe that a beautiful  woman like you don't have a boyfriend." Lucifer giggled.

In your mind you thought, Sooner or Later I'll be having one.I want Lucifer to choose me.

Lucifer thought, I want Y/N to choose me as her boyfriend.

Your food arrived one by one. After having a delightful main course and drink, Lucifer asked " Darling, would you like to have dessert?"

"Yeah..sure, Lucifer.I would like to have one ( favourite dessert) " You said.

" Well, I'll also have it." Lucifer giggled.

After having dessert, you both planned to head back to LUX.

You got inside Lucifer's Corvette.

Before starting to drive, Lucifer said "Darling..um..I just wanted to..,um..tell you something. I  am not sure whether it is the right moment to say. But, I'll be relieved to hear..your..um..response.Y/N, I love you very much. I have been struggling to tell you this as I was not sure how you would react. And, today you saw my Devil face and I really don't know whether you can accept me or not. I'll not move with this relationship without your consent."

Lucifer took a small red box from his pocket and opened it. It was a beautiful  expensive diamond ring.

" Y/N darling, Would you do me the honour of being my girlfriend ? I'll never leave you and I'll always be there for you throughout your life." Lucifer said in a soft voice.

" Yes Lucifer, I love you a lot. You did choose me as your girlfriend.I know how much you meant it as you don't lie.I accept for who you truly are and you don't need to change for me.You really are an angel." You said, tears of joy stained your rosy cheeks.

" I am so happy to hear that, darling. I really can't believe it.You did choose me." Lucifer said and placed his hand behind your neck tenderly and pulled you closer to his juicy lips, for a passionate kiss.

You placed your hand on his face and massaged his cheeks softly, while kissing him. Your kiss became intense and your tongues started fighting for dominance. Lucifer slowly broke the kiss.

Lucifer took your hand gently and put the diamond ring on your finger.

" Lucifer, it's beautiful. Thank you so much." You said with a small smile.

" Oh..it's nothing, my love. I have planned better things for you. This is just a small token of my love." Lucifer blushed and kissed your hand.

" So..um..where to next, eh? LUX or a romantic afternoon at the beach or you have something in your mind?Dealer's choice." Lucifer blushed and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Umm...you can decide, my handsome devil ." You said and kissed his cheek.

" I want you to decide, darling. Whatever it may be, I am sure it I'll be dandy." Lucifer said.

" Um....shall we go..to..the penthouse...of a guy named Lucifer.." You said and giggled.

" Ah...wonderful choice, girlfriend. So penthouse, it is" Lucifer said.

Lucifer and you headed back to LUX.

" Darling, you can go to the penthouse...I'll join you within five minutes, my love...need to talk to Maze about the arrangements for her birthday party..." Lucifer placed a small kiss on your lips.

" Yeah..sure, Lucifer. Take your time.No problem." You said and went to the penthouse.

Soon, Lucifer joined you at the penthouse.

" Miss the Devil already, darling ?.." Lucifer said and placed both his hands around your waist and pulled you towards his chest. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him towards your lipstick smeared lips.

" Hmm..yes,  I missed you, coz you are now my Morningstar and I'll never give you to anybody" You said seductively, still standing in the same posture and traced his lips with your warm fingers.

" Hmm..you are now my Y/N Morningstar" he said in his velvety British accent and planted a passionate trail of kisses on the side of your neck.

You giggled as you found it ticklish.

" So my love, would you like to proceed to the bed?" Lucifer winked.

" I  would love to, my dear Luci...but..um....I need to go out and buy a party dress to wear for Maze's birthday party...and also her birthday gift...I really do want to proceed to the bed with you...it's a shame I can't now.." You pouted.

" It's totally fine, love. Only , when you are ready." Lucifer smiled.

"Thanks for understanding, Lucifer. By the way, it would be a really great help if you could accompany me to dress shop and I could really use your help for buying Maze's gift. Are you ok with it?" You asked.

" Sure darling, how can I say no to my lovely Y/N Morningstar " Lucifer said.

You blushed.

Lucifer and you headed to the dress shop. You bought a ravishing bright red sleeveless mini dress and got a customised knife for Maze, using Lucifer's help.

" Thanks a lot Lucifer for accompanying me. I am heading back home now and I need to freshen up. Will meet you at the party. Enjoy." You said and placed a small peck on his lips. Lucifer moaned.

" I'll drop you back home, Y/N" Lucifer said and dropped you back to your house.

" Bye, Lucifer." You said.

" Bye, dear.Take care" Lucifer said.

😀😍🤩😛😋🥳🥵😈💝💖💗💞💕💟��🍟🍕🍗🍩🍨🍦🍡🍷🍺🍻🥂🥤

MAZE'S BIRTHDAY

You got inside LUX. Lucifer saw you and came towards you.

" Ah...my Y/N looks so beautiful. Darling, you are definitely a wonderful sight..." Lucifer said looking at your red dress.

" And, you look so handsome, my darling Devil." You said looking at Lucifer's purple three-piece suit.

You looked around. Lot of people were dancing, drinking and shouting. There were pole dancers. A big banner with a gigantic text written " HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAZIKEEN" was hung. Party lights enhanced the look of LUX. There was also a  never- ending buffet of various food items, desserts, drinks etc.

" Lucifer, LUX looks just like you, stylish." You commented.

" Why, thank you, my darling." Lucifer said.

"Where's Maze?" You asked.

" Come with me, love." Lucifer said, holding your hand and walked towards Maze.

Maze was wearing a dazzling top along with black leather pants.

" Many, many, happy returns of the day, birthday girl"  You said and hugged Maze.

" Thanks a lot, Y/N. Come we'll dance together." Maze said.

" Yeah sure, Maze. By the way, I forgot one thing." You said and  gave Maze her birthday present.

" It's a customised knife, Maze. Lucifer told me how much you loved whips and knives.Thanks a lot for being a supportive friend, Maze." You smiled.

" This means a lot to me, Y/ N. And, if you want kick someone's ass or break someone's bones, you know who to call right?" Maze chuckled.

" That's true, Y/N darling, Maze will do it gladly." Lucifer giggled.

" And, Maze take care of Y/N, I have something to do..enjoy darling." Lucifer said.

You and Maze danced together for almost an hour.

" Let's grab some tequila" Maze said.

"Yeah!!!" You shouted.

" Hey man-bun, tequila shots stat, here" Maze shouted to a bartender.

You and Maze almost had 15-20 tequila shots along with some food served at the buffet.

You got drunk and shouted "  Hey Mazie, get your ass on the dance floor!!!! Woohoo. This is the best day!!!"

You and Maze started dancing again. You were completely drunk and started moving away from Maze.

" Y/ N, come back." Maze shouted.

You didn't hear.

You got on to the stripper pole and started dancing and shouted at the top of your voice " Hey ladies, I am in love with a fancy British man, Lucifer Morningstar...he is only mine..woohoo" .

Your head started aching and you felt dizzy. You fell from the stripper pole and fortunately, your handsome devil caught you in his sturdy arms.

" Oh my Lucifer...you know I love you to the moon." You said drunkenly.

" Darling, did you have too much tequila shots?...I'll take you to the penthouse..that's better.." Lucifer said worriedly.

" Hmm.,penthouse..my Lucifer's penthouse...Lucifer you are so tall...and I will not let any girl..touch my Morningstar." You said drunkenly and giggled.

Lucifer chuckled at your drunken behaviour and carried you in his arms to the penthouse.

He carefully placed you on his bed and covered you with a cozy blanket.

" Love, I'll give you a glass of water." Lucifer said.

" No...I don't want water...I want you..Come here, Lucifer..." You drunkenly moaned.

" Darling, I'll come to you...but have a glass of water now." Lucifer said.

You drank the glass of water Lucifer offered.

" Lucifer..I obeyed what you said..now you obey me, get your hot muscular body  over here...otherwise I'll punish you..."You shouted.

" Alright, alright darling...." Lucifer let out a light chuckle and layed beside you without his shirt...🤑..

" Hmm..Good boy..."you said in a sleepy tone.

You fell asleep quickly.

Lucifer looked at your cute sleeping face and chuckled.

" Good night and sweet dreams, Y/N..." Lucifer said.

He kissed your forehead and wrapped his arm around you.

" I love you, Y/N"

💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓

I love you all!..😍😍

[iheartbookbran]

in what world has Jaime done as many shitty things as Cersei... he's totally done shitty things, but Cersei is really out here having people tortured, abusing her children, killing babies, raping her teenage cousin, the list goes on? by all means let's hold Jaime to account but this saying he's done 'as many shitty things as Cersei' is honestly like comparing Theon to Euron

Hi anon! I think you’re referring to this post I reblogged about Cersei, in which I said in the tags that Tyrion and Jaime are objectively as shitty.

Ok listen, full on disclaimer here, but I’m not the biggest Jaime fan out there, and I’m by no means an expert on his character, so (in general) take everything I say about him with a grain of salt, but, while Jaime may not have as much blood in his hands as Cersei, I’ll concede you that point, he’s also not a king regent, like Cersei, with huge amounts of liberty—at least at first— to commit war crimes to his hear’s content. He really hasn’t had that much agency in general across the books, with him being a prisoner of war and then being dragged around the Riverlands by Brienne or being taken hostage... again. What readers trend to forget about Jaime is that when does have the agency, as of the start of aGoT, he’s more than a willing participant in Cersei’s schemes.

Yeah sure, he feels bad about it, and he justifies it by saying that he does it because he loves Cersei and wants to protect her, but to that I have to say...

Also I’m gonna disagree in one of the things you listed Cersei has done and Jaime hasn’t.

That is “killing babies” because Jaime doesn’t really show any qualms about harming children? Bran being the biggest example, of course. The only reason he isn’t dead is because he’s got big plot armor. Still, I feel this often gets ignored when discussing Jaime’s character because Bran didn’t die while ignoring the physical and emotional damage he’s suffering as a result, including deep depression. And just because an attempted murder failed doesn’t negate the fact that Jaime still pushed a 7 year old child out of a window with the clear intention of killing him.

He’s also not opposed to maiming children. He was more than willing to cut off Arya’s hand after the Trident incident:

"Do you see that window, ser?" Jaime used a sword to point. "That was Raymun Darry's bedchamber. Where King Robert slept, on our return from Winterfell. Ned Stark's daughter had run off after her wolf savaged Joff, you'll recall. My sister wanted the girl to lose a hand. (...) The king was passed out snoring on the Myrish carpet. I asked my sister if she wanted me to carry him to bed. She told me I should carry her to bed, and shrugged out of her robe. I took her on Raymun Darry's bed after stepping over Robert. (...) "As I was fucking her, Cersei cried, 'I want.' I thought that she meant me, but it was the Stark girl that she wanted, maimed or dead." The things I do for love. "It was only by chance that Stark's own men found the girl before me. If I had come on her first . . ."—aFoC, Jaime IV.

And yeah, he again justifies it on his need to please Cersei, but that’s not good enough for me, not by a long shot.

Same as this....

Edmure raised his hands from the tub and watched the water run between his fingers. "And if I will not yield?"

Must you make me say the words? (...) "You've seen our numbers, Edmure. You've seen the ladders, the towers, the trebuchets, the rams. If I speak the command, my coz will bridge your moat and break your gate. Hundreds will die, most of them your own. Your former bannermen will make up the first wave of attackers, so you'll start your day by killing the fathers and brothers of men who died for you at the Twins. The second wave will be Freys, I have no lack of those. My westermen will follow when your archers are short of arrows and your knights so weary they can hardly lift their blades. When the castle falls, all those inside will be put to the sword. Your herds will be butchered, your godswood will be felled, your keeps and towers will burn. I'll pull your walls down, and divert the Tumblestone over the ruins. By the time I'm done no man will ever know that a castle once stood here." Jaime got to his feet. "Your wife may whelp before that. You'll want your child, I expect. I'll send him to you when he's born. With a trebuchet."

Silence followed his speech. Edmure sat in his bath. (...) With a trebuchet, Jaime thought. If his aunt had been there, would she still say Tyrion was Tywin's son?—aFoC, Jaime VI.

Charming lol. Don’t forget that he’s doing all this while he tells himself that he’s keeping the oath he made to Catelyn about not harming her kin, and the riverlords as an extension, and at the same time defending and giving legitimacy to a hideous unlawful act that Jaime himself, deep down, condones, and yet there he is, waging war against the Tullys. And threatening to trebuchet Edmure’s baby while he’s at it.

I think that my biggest problem with Jaime is exactly that, his willingness to be complicit in all of his family’s wrongdoings and even rationalize his involvement. Like you also mentioned Cersei raping her teenage cousin, and that 100% should not be ignored (though funnily enough, Jaime uses Cersei “infidelity” if you can call it that to slut-shame her lmao, but their relationship is messed up like that). Now Jaime is one of the only male characters that acknowledge marital rape is a thing, that’s good, but at the same time his hold on concent is... shaky at best imo.

With his relationship with Cersei there are some glaring examples:

“Stop it,” she said. “Stop it, stop it, oh please…” But her voice was low and weak, and she did not push him away.—aGoT, Bran II.

“No,” she said weakly when his lips moved down her neck. “Not here. The septons…”

“The Others can take the septons.” He kissed her again, kissed her silent, kissed her until she moaned.—aSoS, Jaime VII.

This is a problem with Cersei as well. Both twins have issues accepting that no means no. And even going beyond that, there’s the whole Tysha fiasco and Jaime’s involvement on it.

"She was no whore. I never bought her for you. That was a lie that Father commanded me to tell. Tysha was . . . she was what she seemed to be. A crofter's daughter, chance met on the road."

Tyrion could hear the faint sound of his own breath whistling hollowly through the scar of his nose. Jaime could not meet his eyes. Tysha. He tried to remember what she had looked like. A girl, she was only a girl, no older than Sansa. "My wife," he croaked. "She wed me."

"For your gold, Father said. She was lowborn, you were a Lannister of Casterly Rock. All she wanted was the gold, which made her no different from a whore, so . . . so it would not be a lie, not truly, and . . . he said that you required a sharp lesson. That you would learn from it, and thank me later . . ."—ASOS, Tyrion XI.

Yes, Jaime, and she was also a teenage girl, who was gang raped on your father’s command, in front of your 13 year old brother who later was forced to participate (and people forget Tyrion was a victim here too).

I mean Jaime is a victim of his father’s abuse the same way his siblings are, but he’s also a full grown adult, more than capable of recognizing right from wrong, yet he still chosen to side with his family and be complicit to their crimes. Sometimes you can be guilty of what you don’t do, not only of what you do.

Of course, it’s kinda unfair to make a complete judgment just yet because his story is not finished, so he might make a turn in that regard, but that really hasn’t happened as far as the books go? Other than him deciding not to go to Cersei because he feels betrayed that she slept with other men. Oh the irony of him turning on her the one time she legitimately needs him to protect her from an actual injustice instead of him inflicting terror on others per her wishes.

I think it’s interesting that GRRM even gives Jaime this opportunity to grow, while he never extends the same courtesy to Cersei. That Jaime spents so much time away from his family—and by extension of Cersei—is a huge factor in that, but I do wonder what would have happened if he didn’t have the fallout with Cersei, if he had been in that position of power to continue the affair with his sister, to what lengths he would have gone to keep her, and that’s why I, personally, believe that he can be, or rather is, as bad as Cersei.

[damejanai]

Dameraji

2020.12.16

S: It's here

K: It has come

S: It's here. And did you know? Around the world now, there have been monoliths sighted?

K: As expected huh

S: And? The first one was in America or something, Utah huh?

K: Hmm

S: And then in Romania, Holand, and England

K: Those are the things that appear, disappear, and then appear somewhere else right?

S: Yeah, what, are they?

K: That, was me

S: Eh? You?

K: That was me

S: That was your, YouTube project?

K: That was for promotion

S: HAHAHAA Well well if you think about it sensibly it's probably it right

K: It's promotion for outer space

S: Ahhh for outer space. If people are behind it, it's probably not just one person right

K: Well yes, it's controlled by organisation by me

S: Hehehe, for you

K: HHAHAA

S: You are quick to reveal it then, if that's the case

K: I thought it was quite about time i reveal the information

S: This is, unexpectedly, my friends from university were also going on about it

K: Oh i see, they were helping to promote it?

S: Eh? You're still continuing that? Ahahaha

K: Coz, you casually brought the topic away, so i didn't know how long should i continue this

S: You know I like occult stuff, and many things happened in 2020 so, i was thinking, what, at the very last part there's something this mysterious happening too?

K: Me too, you know what shocked me most about this monolith talk was that, Yasumoto san was here before our recording, and I was talking to him. We talked about Hosoya san

S: Right

K: and how he is in ascension now. Of course he loves occult stuff and.... what? myths

S: Uh huh, yes

K: And Yasumoto san said, "Isn't Soma getting into that phase soon too?"

S: Hahhaa

K: We were talking about that and here you have it

S: HAHAHAA

K: I thought, whoa as expected you talked about Monoliths

S: First ascension after a few years break. But truthfully, like at one of the previous Damerajis, I said, "Ahh i feel like I'm going to go through ascension again". And honestly I think our moods for these few episodes were weird. Weren't we in rather high spirits?

K: Really?

S: Yeah so, it is starting

K: Just as expected huh

S: It's baddd eh?

K: We'll be going over together

S: You know it's the age where we can share our brains so

K: I know right, our databases are connected, by 5G

S: Totally....Can, we start?

K: Shall we

S: Saito Soma

K: Ishikawa Kaito's

S/K: Damejanai Radio

----

"in bloom"

S: We're gonna play one song later so it's not a bad radio

K: WooHOOOO Wowoowowow

S: You're reacting like that?

K: Hahhahaa

S: I've never even seen that on TV

K: Really? But isn't it common in anime?

S: No!

K: DoHYAAA!

S: What is that?

K: Album's out next week, DoHYAAAAA

S: AHHHH Ohooooi!

K: Such a happy thing~ happy~

S: So one song will be played here~

K: Come on if it isn't played here, where else would it be played?

S: Right? Dameraji has really been promoting it a lot for me

K: Amazing right

S: More than me promoting it myself

K: If i knew Dameraji was promoting this much I would think about it more.... Well I'll only THINK but that doesn't necessary convert into actions~~~ ahhaa So today we will be playing a song, and hearing some insights... but for the song, it won't be available in the archives

S: Yes, just that

K: So please just enjoy the insights

S: Yes~~

K: Only today guys~~ that you will be hearing the insights of the song while listening to it~

S: Well I've not really talked a lot about the songs.... well I have in interviews but in my own natural voice

K: Natural voice...

S: That doesn't mean anything... really.. it hasn't started (ascension)

K: Monoliths and natural voice....

S: HAHAHAA

---

~"Carpool"~

S: Ah yes, thank you, many have mentioned that, No Licence Driving

K: That's true right?

S: No no, all I did was sit in the driver's seat

K: Uh huh uh huh

S: I wasn't driving

K: But you know, those with no licence have no right to sit there

S: I was properly sitting in the driver's seat, not driving, but reading a book

K: Hahhahaha

S: Very properly

K: Seriously?

S: Uh huhhh. But this MV has been released and I've received quite a lot of comments.... many were saying that, " Isn't this a song about Kaito kun?"

K: Ohhhhh

S: I want to say it loud and clear, NO

K: Oh it's not a song from my point of view?

S: No no no, totally not

K: Hmmm

S: One thing was that, when i was writing the lyrics, i was thinking that i wouldn't like it but people might think that way

K: Don't say you wouldn't like it

S: wwwww

K: Whatever happened to the things you said last last episode?

S: www Well but you know, whenever i write songs, i don't really want to decide what kind of song it is about, and would like it to be interpreted differently

K: True

S: This "carpool" to me, is about youth. But it may be youth in your teens, or youth like us, before 30

K: Ho ho ho

S: So i think that hearing that the theme is "youth", you could still have different ways of interpreting it

K: Makes me want to hear the different interpretations

S: Yeah yeah yeah, at this point, it has one chorus and a little bit of the second part. But if you listen to the second part of the song, you'll probably think of it differently

K: Ohhhhh

S: Yes yes

K: That's interesting, so afterwards when we're not on air, you'll be telling me, "Actually I wrote it with this meaning in mind" (soma voice)

S: What, me secretly telling you stuff, sounds like that?

K: Huh?

S: No no

K: You don't realise it?

S: Nooo, "I wrote it with this meaning in mind"

K: "You know, I don't know how many people will get it though"

S: Don't do that your hair like that

K: That's what you do

S: That's true i tend to do that, well thank you, my album will be out next week

Song played: Carpool

K: I understand now, you know, when i was searching my name on Twitter, there were a lot of stuff that came up that made me go, "ah!"

S: Hahahaa, Like?

K: Isn't it about Kaito kun?

S: No

K: Ehhh!!

S: It's not a song about Ishikawa san

K: But you know, I don't mention it a lot but, my car is an open car, you know?

S: AHHAHAHAa..No.. STOPPP!! Doing what i'm good at

K: Screaming

S: STOPPPPP!

K: Ahhh that's when you really hate it, when your life's at stake

S: This song... when I wrote the song, the lyrics came to mind at the same time. It's true since I don't have a driver's licence, so the driver's seat is "your special spot"

K: Yes, my special spot

S: Hahaha! But if you listen to what comes after, the last chorus, you'll have a different interpretation of it

K: Don't tell me.. it's death?

S: Ohhhhhhh

K: Ohhhhh?

S: Kaito kun, how do you always know?

K: AHHAHHAA

S: It has begun huh

K: Right? Ahhh... is that it.... is that it...

S: That'll become like Kaito kun dies

K: So I actually recorded all of this before I died

S: You're a hologram? ( O.o! Just like one of the Mangas that Soma recommended on his daily recommendations)

K: I was told to record myself talking as if i was talking to Soma san

S: If that's the case then our conversations complement so well. Well rather than dying, well, I welcome everyone to have different interpretations but it's like singing about something you lost

K: Uh huh uh huh, I see

S: But youth, like what i mentioned earlier, at our age, we're still continuing to be youths but in a different form

K: I see

S: There's something you lost, but there's also things that are continuing, it's just singing it from a unique point of view

K: In "Date", you also went to the sea right

S: wwwww Right? I personally don't go to the beach at all

K: Because you get all sticky , you said

S: So, am I really going to the beach?

K: Oooooh

S: Well well, you can interpret it in many ways

K: This is scary....

S: Rightt www

~Dameraji Photo Studio~

Pose like a present box

Guests next week:

Nakajima Yoshiki

Sakakihara Yuki

81!

[swansstuff]

So uh, I've been thinking about a hypothetical Trucy Wright: Act Attorney and here is the very poorly written outline for it because yeah. No spoilers except the Apollo Trucy thing. Tw death, murder, blood and grieving so yeah.

Trucy's first case is literally her first ever case. This is a flashback case. We follow her as she wakes up, slightly stressed about today, Phoenix gives her cereal and a pep talk and a cryptic message. Trucy asks where Papa is, it is Miles, they are married. Phoenix is cryptic about that too. He stays behind as he "has to buy groceries" so Trucy heads into the office. Apollo greets her, it's clear they know they're siblings, and he hands her a case. Miles is prosecuting. She is fucking terrified. She goes to the crime scene, Gumshoe is the detective and he's educating his teenage sons, constant confusion of who's who, because they are twins and they look very like Gumshoe, it'll be kinda funny. Its a simple investigation. During the investigation, the player can check Trucy's profile and the profile system shows character's middle names now. We get some gems such as Klavier Hyacintha Gavin later on, the reasoning behind this is coz Trucy is nosy. The important one here is Trucy Mia Wright. She says something about how she chose her own middle name when Phoenix adopted her and she chose Mia after learning about her. Yada yada. Trucy wins the case. Edgeworth is very proud, Phoenix is in the gallery and there's a flash of him crying proud tears, Apollo hugs her afterwards, Athena congrats her.

Next case, flash forward three years later, we do not see Phoenix and nobody really mentions him. Thats because he's fucking dead but we don't know that yet. This case is a Fey case, we meet Maya who is married to Franziska and they're technically on honeymoon in Kurain and Pearl becomes the Maya to Trucy's Phoenix. Its another fey murder case. There are a few mentions of Trucy's admiration of Mia, mainly just a mirror of a few lines she's said and a conversation where her and Maya talk about her, Trucy says she would have loved to meet her and Maya explains how her spirit has been dormant for ages now and how she assumes she's moved on.

"If you want I can try and channel-"

"No no no no NO. Its ok!"

This is our first hint that Phoenix is no longer with us, but we don't know until later thats what she means. Sebastian is the prosecutor, the player finds out that Miles is taking a break from prosecuting work, Trucy already knew of course, and Sebastian is dubbed Chief until he comes back, Fran says

"It would've been me were I not on my literal honeymoon right now." We are not told why yet, but it is because of Phoenix. Kay Faraday is the detective, somebody murders someone and frames Maya, no-one is shocked by this. We also get an update on Iris, she's thriving. She wins yada yada.

Next case, a couple of months later, Trucy gets a call from a friend that the player can't identify at first. Its Katrielle Layton. She needs Trucy's legal knowledge because someone is sueing her detective agency because have you seen how they practice. This, of course, turns to murder and we get another surprise when we meet the prosecutor. Who probably has a licence to practise law in England? Simon Blackquill, he is British ok. Yeah, Trucy wins with Kat's help, we meet Ernest and Sherl and Alfendi and Flora if we have time. I miss them. Trucy and Kat have a conversation that cryptically addresses their fathers and their "whereabouts" and living up to their legacy. We see Trucy cry, but only a similar flash to AJ:AA and we do not know why. Yet.

Next case, flashback case. Trucy is the assistant on this case but we still play as her, even in the court sections since Phoenix is prepping her for the bar and getting her to give him the answers. The bar exam is only in three days. Klavier is prosecuting. The case somehow relates to Kristoph and there's the whole mirror dynamic thing of when Phoenix lost his badge. Kristoph is dead by now, but the whole thing is there was a plot inside prison to make Phoenix pay for putting a bunch of them in, Kristoph was the assumed ring leader until he died and the cops now dont know who's running it. Somebody (Godot? That would hurt big time) was their inside man, sent to figure that out, so when whoever it was turned up dead, the whole thing got exposed. We get a bit of a Mia moment in the trial where Trucy tells Phoenix to flip over the receipt (thats evidence for some reason). Phoenix says "I feel like that shouldn't be the second time someone has said that to me". The killer is found, by Phoenix, and put into isolation, as have most of the other participants. We then see Trucy get her badge. They have a conversation and Trucy says Phoenix basically forgot about it for a couple of months. The case closes with a foreboding "and I forgot about it too, until..."

Next case. Phoenix is fucking murdered. Trucy gets a phone call late at night, she hears laboured breathing on the other end and a "don't forget I love you" from Phoenix. Trucy pulls a simba and goes "dad? Dad?!!" And the line goes dead. The player is presented with a choice of who to call. They have two phone calls. Who they choose first makes no difference, but the second time they are forced to choose Ema who will trace Phoenix's phone call. They could call Apollo and he would comfort her, Miles would panic, Maya would say he was just messing around, Athena would sense her distress and say she's coming over etc. You could attempt to call Phoenix back but he would not answer and you would be allowed to call someone else. Ema then traces the phone call and we follow Trucy to the crime scene. We get a truly haunting cutscene where everything kinda goes blurry except Phoenix's face and the blood. Trucy doesn't cry. She stands there in shock. The WAA is there in various states of shock and upset. Return of grieving Apollo I guess. Miles turns up and the look on his face is haunting. Trucy and him make eye contact and they share the thought of something has to be done. And then. "The bar association took me off the case and Papa too, they said we were too close to it. As a result, we never found out who did it... Until now." And we see a determined Trucy face. We jump forward to where we last saw Trucy, she and Pearl are coming back from England and its a bit more cheery. Trucy sends Pearl on a train back to Kurain and heads on home. She enters the house and we see Miles pouring over Phoenix's case. He jumps up and runs towards her.

"Trucy! I think I have a lead, I-"

"Papa, you're tired, go to bed." (Or better dialogue along those lines)

Its clear he's been doing this sort of thing a lot.

"But I do! At least...I think I do..."

He trails off and rests his head in his hands.

"Do I? Or am I just a mess?"

Trucy gives him a sad smile.

"C'mon let's go to bed."

Miles returns the sad smile and fades out like all ace attorney characters do. The player is given the option to look around. There's probably some emotional dialogue and bits that give clues to how she and Miles have been fairing the past 3 years. Answer is, not very well. Examine the pile of papers on the table. Trucy will take a look and then realise her papa may have actually been onto something. Its a diagram of which prisoners knew each other, with an arrow from each leading to a defense attorney we have never met. Trucy is confused, but she calls for Miles anyway. He comes back downstairs and Trucy asks him about this lead he found.

"Well I realised all those prisoners would know this defense attorney (insert name?)"

"Why? And why would they be suspicious?'

"They (pronouns?) Were always the defense attorney who would take on the cases of those Wright had already accused. They gained a reputation of being the doomed defense attorney."

"So... They knew all the prisoners in the plot and they had a grudge against daddy... Papa I think you're onto something!"

And the case continues, since we already know who's been accused, it plays out more like an investigations game, Trucy has to prove it, with Miles' help of course, literally every other character we know and love plays a part in making sure this guy gets a guilty verdict. There is still a courtroom bit and a moment when all is looking dark, Trucy literally has a full on breakdown as the Judge threatens to remove her from the case again. Miles is by her side, they're both technically prosecution here i guess. Miles, however, is too deep in his own mental breakdown to help. Everyone else is in the gallery besides Pearl. Pearl channels Phoenix as a last hope sort of thing. Phoenix comforts her and tells her to keep fighting, he touches her badge and probably says some sort of bullshit about it. The Judge is about to bang the gavel when Trucy and Phoenix object at the same time. Miles looks up and realises whats going on and he objects too, a little later. The battle goes on until it finishes and the other attorney has a breakdown that steals little bits from every other murderer Phoenix has put behind bars.This is the one time seeing the word guilty on your screen feels good. There's a whole heartwarming celebration at the end, Phoenix sticks around for a little bit and everyone gets a bit of closure. Its assumed he's gone since Pearl passes out and Trucy dips out for a sec. She's away from the festivities, staring at the badge in her hand and we see someone coming up behind her. Maya is channelling Phoenix now. He gives Trucy a hug and utters the words "the only time a lawyer can cry is when its all over and, Trucy darling, my light, its over." Echoing both Diego and Mia.

And the screen fades to black with a final hug between father and daughter.

:)

[novantinuum]

Contact (Ch. 2/4)

Fandom: Steven Universe

Rating: T (No TW this chapter)

Words: 3.0K~

Summary: The first (and with any luck, only) time it happens, he’s almost 16.

Chapter Summary: Help arrives. Amethyst struggles to cope amidst the chaos.

So this fic is Steven and Amethyst centric, set during the 2 year time skip. It’s also kinda in conversation with An Indirect Kiss, and explores the idea of what could happen to a hybrid with a cracked gem. This chapter has no specific trigger warnings. It will be exactly 4 parts.

AO3 link and a link to the first chapter can be found in the reblogs! Support there or here (via reblogs) is very much appreciated! <3

____

Chapter 2: The Worry

A frantic phone call and a few minutes later, one of the decommissioned Roaming Eyes that’s been stationed on Earth carefully lowers through the gaps in the forest canopy. Amethyst lets out a sigh as it lands in the clearing with a solid thunk, her fiercely protective grip on Steven’s hand relaxing a little. Stars, she’s never been so relieved to see one of these clunkers in her whole life.

Those passing minutes are what really worry her, though. Transport will be quick now, but there’s still too many awful what-ifs hanging over her like an anvil to her gem. Like, what if they’ve already wasted too much of Steven’s precious time? What if he’s gonna be permanently damaged ‘coz of all this, since he’s a hybrid, so extraordinarily different from the rest of them? Or, what if there’s not enough water left in the fountain to heal him in the first place? Last she saw, its finite supply was pretty lacking. It’s why they’ve transitioned to healing the corrupted Gems at the Temple as of late, utilizing the Diamonds’ bottled essence rather than the scrap leftovers of the fountain water they anointed in person last year.

But Steven never bottled any of his. And now, with the source of his healing magic totally busted, there’s nothing they can do but visit the fountain and hope beyond all hopes there’s some of Rose’s tears still there.

Oh, if only they were closer to a warp. If they were, then Amethyst could’ve hefted him into her arms like she always used to when he was smaller, carried him there, then bam- they could be on location in an instant. No transport ship needed. Unfortunately though, the two of them hiked a good half hour before big ol’ nasty caught wind of their trail. Like it or not, the warp pad is simply too far away. And she’s not about to risk worsening his crack by jostling him as she runs on such a long trip.

So yeah, this particular Roaming Eye may be old, janky tech, but it’ll have to do.

The teen stiffens in her hold again, eyes growing bleary. “A… A-Amethyst?? I think I’m—“

The violent muscle contractions cut off his words as quickly as the slash of a whip. Knowing the drill by now she lightens her hold, allowing him just enough space to seize without hurting himself. She grimaces. It doesn’t even sound like he can catch a full breath as his body jerks and spasms against his control. The helpless, labored wheezing pouring out from him is almost physically painful to listen to, her own form glitching in sympathy for a split instant.

“Shhh,” she whispers, delicately dancing around the innate fear of the situation. “Don’t talk. Save your energy, remember? I-I... we’ve got ya’. Y’see there? They just landed!"

Blessedly, his seizures reach their end by the time the engines of the craft fully shut off. His whimpers slowly lessen, his eyelids fluttering shut in all his exhaustion.

Her fingers comb through his thick dark curls. “We’ll fix ya’ right up, buddy…”

She’s mopping the sweat off his forehead as the door slides ajar, and Pearl dashes out of the ship with Greg practically sticking to her heels. Amethyst braces herself for the inevitable chastising.

“What on Earth were you thinking,” the Pearl in her subconscious squawks, “letting him get hurt like this?!”

But the reprimanding she instinctively expects never comes.

Instead, the ivory Gem sprints to her side alongside the boy’s father, and— dropping to her knees— envelops her in what’s perhaps the tightest hug she’s ever received from her.

“Amethyst!” she cries, lithe fingers gripping at her long lavender hair. “Oh, thank goodness you’re okay! What happened?”

Clasped tight in her embrace, she allows herself a moment to catch her breath as the world ticks onwards around her. It’s but a small kindness. Admittedly, she’s still too shell-shocked about all of this to give a swift response, too distracted by the overwhelming reality of Greg’s anguished expression as he takes in the sight of his son lying prone before him, his paleness stark against the soft blue of his t-shirt.

“Steven!”

It’s hard to watch. Humans get so weirdly sensitive on the topic of injury— but then, she figures that’s because humans are so squishy and fragile, and always fixated on how short their lifespans are and how easily they can be cut short. Even if Steven’s special, even if in the end his crack will be fixed and he’ll likely be fine, (of course he’ll be fine, he has to be fine!), she supposes it’s only natural for Greg to worry. When the man collapses to his knees in front of him, he grabs Steven’s hand and babbles reassurances into his ear, words spoken too light for either Gem to pick up. Steven’s eyelids subtly twitch upon this appeal to his humanity.

Her glance flicks towards the Roaming Eye as Pearl waits for her to say something, anything.

“I…” she begins with marked hesitation. “I’ll explain everything once we’re on the ship. Gotta help Steven first, yeah?”

She nods, pulling away to stand. “Y-yes, of course. You’re right.”

Kneeling beside her, Greg’s voice quivers, ever so slightly. “You’re gonna be fine, buddy,” he whispers to the boy, his hand squeeze only barely reciprocated. “You’re gonna be just fine.”

Pearl interrupts his frantic reassurances with a nudge to his shoulder.

“We need to carry him,” she says, voice strained. It’s clear she’s only barely choking back her panic. “One mustn’t waste any time when it comes to cracked gems, after all!” Without skipping a beat, she leads the human’s quivering hands to the teen’s ankles. “Here, you can lift him by the legs like so, Amethyst, his torso, and then I’ll be at front supporting his neck and shoulders—“

Steven gives a soft whine, breath fast and shallow.

Amethyst swallows, drinking in the nuances of the scene. Steven’s jaw is clenched. Clearly, he’s holding back on expressing how much pain he’s in, bottling it up for their sake. Meanwhile, Greg— anxious single father that he is— is about one second away from breaking down entirely. She‘s almost scared what his reaction will be if Steven experiences another one of his seizing fits in his presence. And Pearl? Much as she loves her, uptight and fraying at the ends is most definitely not the sort of leader they need right now. Truth be told she’s not confident she is either, but hey, hard times call for unexpected solutions.

Gently, she stands to her feet and guides her away from Steven’s body. “Hey, Greg-o and I got this, P. No worries. Just have the ship ready for us.”

“I— are you sure?”

“Yeah, we can carry him no problem, right Greg?”

She turns to match eyes with him, every fragment of her being silently pleading for his agreement.

“Uh, I— sure,” he says, although he doesn’t sound so confident. “I think so. Let me just...” He huffs as he pushes himself off his knees, and shifts closer to his son’s head. “I’ll hold him up front, okay? I’m taller, an’ I’ve carried him before, an’—“

Amethyst’s tone softens. “Hey.” Straining to hold herself together for his sake, amidst all her doubts and fears, she moves to pat his forearm. Attempts to ground him. “Hey, you’re good. We can do this.”

She closes her eyes and inhales deeply to calm down her own unsteady form. No panic. Don’t let them see your panic. You’ve gotta be the mature one here. It’s gonna work out, Steven will be fine. You’ll all be fine.

Breathe. Just breathe.

“Pearl, start the ship for us,” she says once she’s balanced herself. Not a question, not a request, no hesitation in her tone. Not a confused, defective Quartz soldier waiting for orders, nor a naïve Gem clinging on the heels of the first living souls she ever saw, nor a loyal teammate constantly deferring to another’s judgement out of insecurity, out of the flawed belief that no one would ever take an overcooked runt like her seriously. No, no. Not today. Instead, as she rises above the shadowed, fettered memories of her past, Amethyst takes hold of the reigns of leadership as easily as grasping her whip.

Pearl offers a weak smile as she nods in confirmation, and starts to scuttle back towards the Roaming Eye’s door. “Yes, of course!”

Good, she thinks. One issue taken care of. Now, as for Steven and Greg...

The two shift in tandem around the cracked boy as they prepare to lift him. In his current state, it’s imperative that they’re careful. She clasps her hands around his ankles, feeling a twisting close to her gem as she watches him instinctively flinch at her touch.

“Shh-shh, it’s okay,” Greg whispers. “We gotcha.”

“Dad,” he croaks, the first words he’s had the strength to speak in a good while.  “Duhh- D-Dad, I... Ahm- I’m suh... sss-so sorry—“

Her hard-light form nearly spikes cold with fear as he continues to mindlessly babble. Shards, now his words are becoming slurred! He’s deteriorating. They gotta make this quick.

“Steven, we’re gonna pick you up on three, capiche?” She locks eyes with his father, her friend, seeking confirmation. “Ready?”

“One,” Greg mutters, solidifying his hold under his armpits.  

“Two...”

“Three!” they say at once, hefting the teen’s full weight up off the forest floor with a grunt.

He produces a sharp gasp in response. The sound makes her cringe. She knows they can’t avoid jostling him altogether if they want to transport him to the fountain, but... geeze, she really hopes they’re not hurting him any more than he already is. And she hopes he doesn’t seize up on them again while he’s off the ground. That could turn out disastrously.

Working together, they carry him across the grassy clearing and up the shallow incline of the ship’s ramp. Slow and steady, as careful as they can be... Greg’s breathing hard by the time they reach the entrance, but his grip holds strong. Meanwhile, Pearl sits at the cockpit, punching in coordinates for Rose’s fountain. Besides her, the ship is empty.

“No Garnet?” Amethyst asks as she leads them inside, finally seeing fit to bring up the obvious question.

She shakes her head in fervent stress. “She’s still away on her mission on the Niessea Belt worlds. I tried contacting her, but—“

Steven gives a painful, keening cry, his entire body shooting rigid in their hold. Her eyes snap open wide.

Shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, not now, not now—

“Greg- Greg, hold him!” she shouts, slipping into hysterics as he begins to seize again, limbs jerking and breath coming in quick shallow gasps. She can feel the muscles of his legs spasm in staccato bursts under her hands. “Hold him, don’t drop him, you—“

Pearl jumps up from her seat upon hearing all the commotion. “What’s wrong with him??”

“I’m trying, I’m—!”

“Set him down, set him down! Quickly! We gotta get him back on the floor where it’s safe, I can’t let him get hurt again, I can’t—“

“Sh-shta...” Steven slurs, face contorting as he rides this episode out. “Puh... please, I—“

“I’m starting the ship!” the ivory Gem says, punching the last few buttons needed to close the door and launch them on their way.

The Roaming Eye shakes ever so gently as it lifts up out of the dense forest. Amethyst stumbles, legs slightly wobbling as she coordinates with Greg to deposit Steven safely on the cool metallic floor, his head resting in his father’s lap. His spasms are more intermittent now. Hopefully this means this latest round of seizing has reached its end.

For now, she can’t help but fret, swallowing with a heavy gulp as she watches Greg comb back his sweat slicked curls. Until they can fix that crack in his gem, he’s gonna get worse and worse. She knows this from experience. Simply put, being cracked long-term is a nightmare. You can’t think straight, you can’t speak straight, you lose all control of your physical form... She’d willingly poof a thousand times if it meant she could avoid janking up her gem like that again.

Which is why it absolutely shatters her to have to watch Steven suffer through this too.

She watches silently as the boy lets his eyes slide shut for now, held safe in his father’s embrace. His rest isn’t exactly restful— as evident from how his brow and nose keep scrunching inwards as he seethes from the sensation of it all— but anything is better than nothing in this state.

“So you- you said he’s cracked?” Greg asks, looking up at her with dampened eyes. His hands are shaking now. The man is clearly a hair’s breadth away from breaking down in tears. It’s genuinely a credit to his strength as a father that he’s holding it together at all.

Gently, Amethyst lifts the hem of his shirt to reveal his gemstone. The deep gouge marring the diamond at his navel says everything her words cannot. The others’ reactions are immediate, their eyes blowing wide with fear. Even Pearl, even someone who knows the power of Rose’s healing magic firsthand. Horror clutching with a vice-like grip upon her gem, she notes that the crack has expanded since she last looked.

“We were just tracking down that corrupted Gem that tripped our detectors this morning,” she explains. “But it ambushed us! I... geeze, I thought we could like, poof it no problem, but...”

“It got the jump on him instead,” Pearl says in a blunt, grim manner. She balls up her hand at her chin, expression haunted by the very thought. “Stars, I can’t even imagine how badly this hurts! It must have taken quite the hit to crack a diamond like this.”

His father rubs at the boy’s shoulder, wincing at the sight of his baseline quivering, his jaw clenched like a knife to the grindstone and his eyes twisted shut. “Is there anything we can do right now to lessen the pain for him?”

Hmm. She curls her lip, musing on this. Good ol’ Pierogi probably has human pain killers stashed away somewhere in that pearl of hers. But there’s no guarantee that such a remedy would do a single thing to help, given the nature of his injury. It’s the Gem half of him that’s hurt, not the squishy organic half. So whatever they do it’s gotta be a Gem remedy, and the only Gem remedy she can think of for an injured Gem is...

“Well,” Pearl begins cautiously, her gaze drifting between the three of them, “when Gems became cracked during the rebellion, we used to poof them until Rose could return to use her healing magic, so they wouldn’t have to deal with the trauma of glitching out so badly. But of course, Steven’s different! He’s half human. We can’t expect it’ll work in the same way!”

Although...

“Can we poof him?” she shrugs, playing devil’s advocate for a moment.

The whites of Greg’s eyes expand as he gawks at her. “W-what are you suggesting, exactly?”

“I mean, he can fuse, right?”

“Well, yes—“

“An’ same as poofing,” she cuts back in, holding up a finger for emphasis, “fusion is a sorta... shifting of our hard light forms. His organic half goes somewhere during all that, yeah? If he poofed, maybe it’d be the same.”

The man’s sunburnt face drains just about as pale as Pearl’s as he clutches onto his son all the tighter. “Uh, I don’t think now’s the right time to test a hypothesis like that. Or ever.”

“Greg’s right,” Pearl says. “There’s simply too much we can’t say with certainty about his hybrid nature.” Tears building in her eyes, she brushes her slender fingers against his cheek. “But he’s a fighter, our Steven. He’ll carry through.”

Below her, Steven lets out a soft whimper. Realization hits her with the force of a quartz’s strike that she genuinely has no way of knowing for sure how much or how little he’s aware of his surroundings right now. Her face flushes dark with shame. Held taut at her sides, she clenches her fists tight, mentally pulling away from the conversation in which clearly her stupid half-baked ideas are unwelcome and instead fixating on the quickened thrum of the hard light running in channels through every square inch of her form. A pang of anger swells up within her, all putrid and stale. What on Earth was she thinking?? He’s in agony, he’s broken, and yet she has the gall to suggest such a moronic, risky idea anyways? When his very survival hangs in the balance? Geeze. What the hell.

She’s disgusting.

She hastily stalks away from the trio to catch some fresh air, slouching against one of the windows and pressing her cheek to the glass. A small sliver of her can’t help but admire the view through the Roaming Eye’s wide windows. The ship running on autopilot, they’ve long since lifted through the clouds and into the stratosphere. It’s all white and grey swirls as far as the eye can see. The reds and pinks of sunset edging at the visible horizon greet them with warmth.

With everything else plaguing her it’s a hollow appreciation, though. No matter what thoughts she tries to distract herself with, the memory of that ill-fated fight sinks its claws into her mind more and more by the minute. Every tangible stimulus— the sights, the smells, the sounds, the pains— it all plays on repeat. It’s insufferable, obsessive. Like some self-despairing sapphire she traces each and every decision that led her here, bolds and underlines every mistake.

And no matter how many times she tries with desperation to make up for it, tries to save him, no matter how many loops through recent past she takes, it all brings her to one single, overwhelming conclusion:

All of this... all of this needless suffering...

It should’ve been her.

[vanchlo]

The Assistant / Chapter Forty-One, “Finally”

*Gifs are not mine*

Clickable Links:

- *NEW* Becky Magazine Cover from an O.C. Tag Challenge c:

- Masterlist feat. all chapters and Character Surveys

- Inspo tag

- Hecky Playlist

- Read on Wattpad

Warnings: None

Word Count: 10.3k words

Song:  You’re Still The One by Shania Twain, bc duh Just Like Heaven by The Cure (click to listen)

A/N: I am SO excited for you to read this chapter, you’ll soon find out why ;)

                                 SNEAKYYYYYY PEEEEEK

For the fiftieth time in the last two days, I couldn’t be more grateful for how easy things are coming together. I couldn’t be more thankful to have him by my side. It still feels like a dream getting to live this life now, and getting to work with him on the daily, singing Spice Girls amidst stolen cheek kisses.

One puzzle piece at a time, and there’s only one or two pieces left in this puzzle of ours.

"And then my soul saw you and it kind of went ‘Oh, there you are. I’ve been looking for you.’"

                             - Iain Thomas, ‘I Wrote This For You’

There was truly nothing that could rock the waves I was currently riding, and I couldn’t wait a second longer to do the very thing that would make them even bigger. They had only climbed since telling Asher earlier this evening, and the smile that shared on our faces. 

Skye was sprawled out on the sofa when I opened the door, finding it impossible to hide the grin on my face as I read a text from Harry that had dinged a moment before. 

i havent been this excited for somethin in a long time bug. absolutely cant wait to see u on friday, idk if i can wait that long ;) good luck on ur case with Myles 2moro, you’ll do great Becks xo

“Well, look who has a pep in her step, all of a sudden. I don’t think I’ve seen you smile in days, since Harry’s left. What’s the occasion, Ree?” she teases, surprising me with the simple act of muting an episode of The Great British Bake Off that our nights consist of as of late. 

“I may have had a good day,” I suggest with a shrug of my shoulders as I put my coat away in the closet. 

“Since bloody when? You were in a shitty mood the last time we spoke, having ‘Harry withdrawals,’ or something. I’d say the only reason you could be happy right now is if you’d seen him, which would be impossible seeing he’s in Glasgow for another few days,” she mutters. I observe the look on her face change and how her eyebrows dance along her forehead after I turn around to face her, letting the smile lose. “Wait, he’s still there, isn’t he?” she questions, reaching a hand out as if looking for an answer with her body, too. 

My head shakes from side to side slowly as my lips part to show my teeth, a rarity among my smiles, and the expression dawning on her face tells me she recognizes it too. “He came back today, his case finished early, Skye. And I asked him out on a date!” 

“You didn’t?! Ree, you better not be kidding with me, or I’m gonna be really pissed at you!” she chuckles, feigning intimidation in her voice. Hints of the emotions buzzing around inside of me play across her face, meanwhile, my happiness keeps growing notch after notch. 

I don’t know if I can wait that long either, Harry, cause I can’t remember the last time I was this excited. Thank you so much xxx

“I’m not kidding, Skye, and he said yes! He didn’t even let me finish asking and he said yes!” I exclaim after sending the text I had been typing, feeling her arms come around me in a shock when I look back up. 

“I’m so fucking happy for you, Ree, it’s about bloody time!” she remarks excitedly, almost crushing me in a hug. 

“Me too, I can’t remember the last time I was this happy,” I admit softly, relaxing in her arms, even though part of me wishes they were the arms of somebody else. Only an hour later, and I already miss him. Wow, I’ve got this bad. 

“Did you kiss him at least?!”

“No, I’m waiting for the date, I guess. I looked like proper crap today, I’ve been up so late the last few nights prepping for the case with Myles,” I laugh, pulling away from her smell of peaches and chocolate when my pocket dings. 

“First kisses aren’t something you plan, Ree, they just happen out of nowhere. The sooner, the better.” 

“I guess you’re right,” I confess with a smile stuck to my lips. “We’ll just see what happens.”

+

Happiness and its synonyms still fill me to the brim an hour later, and whilst my thumbs flit across the screen of my phone. Her words stare back at me, and unbeknownst to me how, I wish I could see her again already. My footsteps wander down the main hallway, and before I know what I’m doing, I arrive at her door. Low and behold, it’s closed and my heart sinks into my chest when I find darkness waiting behind it. 

miss u already bug xoxo

My words are whisked off to her, and soon my legs are entering the doorway of a certain somebody’s office, although not the one I was hoping for.

“It’s about time you made your rounds and came to say hi to me. Should I feel offended I’m the last one on your list?” Myles teases from behind his desk with a grin lining his lips. 

“Oh, shuddup. Did Becks leave already fer tha night?” I question, letting my shoulder fall to the door frame as I watch the small ‘delivered’ appear under my blue text. 

“Yeah, I ran into her about twenty minutes ago in the break room when she was clocking out. What, didn’t you already see her?”

“Ya, she was me first visitor. I was jus’ hopin’ t’ see her ‘gain,” I shrug, well aware of the terrible job I’m doing of hiding the one hundred watt smile I’m wearing. 

“And does that have anything to do with you blinding me with that smile of yours?” he inquires, raising a sandy blonde eyebrow at me. 

“Maybe it has sumthin’ t’ do with me havin’ a date with her on Friday, as of an hour ago,” I reveal casually with a shrug of my shoulders, feeling the smile grow larger somehow. 

“Fucking finally,” Myles chimes with happiness spreading across his face, and I nod quickly. 

“I know, ‘s all finally comin’ t’getha fer us.”

+

It would be accurate to say that I was still in utter disbelief after yesterday, and rehashing it all to Skye the second I got home only made it all seem more real, and even better. Then again, that was an understatement, because I had been waiting for this for years. I had been waiting to feel this way for too long, and to be able to say and think that I have a date with Harry tomorrow. An actual, proper date. Several times, I cursed myself for not making the date on Thursday night, tonight, because although I had waited painstakingly for five days, another two felt like twenty years.

It was even bittersweet coming to work the next day and not seeing him there, confusing the habits and expectations I had come to know. I still had to finish up the case with Myles that he would finish arguing, with my help, for the next two days. I tried to think of it that way, that the date would be even better after finishing that case, and in a way, signifying my return to Harry. God, it was all too perfect, but it would be even more so if I didn’t have to wait another bloody day, well actually two, to see him. Yesterday wasn’t long enough, but when I think about it, no length of time ever is with him and that’s how I know I’m in trouble.

Also, that I’m walking right into one of my dreams.

+

After a morning spent in court starting off the case, I was back at the firm with Myles after lunch to work on it some more. He had given me more time to myself to work on my own than Harry had, but I preferred it that way. Harry was right, Myles was good to me, and I did learn a lot from him, but it wasn’t the same as being with Harry. Nothing has ever and never will be the same as being with him, certainly not. Also, the whole Family and Interpersonal side of court was depressing as fuck, I found out. The topic littered Harry and I’s conversations the last almost week, resulting in me taking after him and deciding to stay far away from it for now. 

I’m reminded of him everywhere I go, and it definitely makes trying to get my work done all the more difficult. I see his face in the succulent sat at the corner of my desk, behind my office chair where he would lean over me to help me on my laptop, on my sofa where he opened his birthday presents with explosive happiness, and in the reflection on the tall window where I now stand in the same spot as on his birthday when he hugged me against his front with a kiss to my head. A day later, and it all still feels so surreal to me, and I’m not mad about it. I appreciate its distracting qualities, leaving me to not worry as much about what the hell I’m going to wear tomorrow, and messing things up. Skye’s already picked out five outfits for me by now, I’m sure, but I was at a loss last night when I perused my closet. The pressure to impress somebody I’ve already met a hundred times, feels even greater than my second interview I had at the firm, and I tell myself I don’t know why, even though I do.

I want to wear the right thing, and feel beautiful. More than that, I don’t want to mess things up between us, again, no matter how stupid that sounds. No matter how premature it is to worry about right now.

With the happiest of sighs, I wander over to my bookshelf that now sits a dozen law books, gifts from Harry, Skye, Robbie, my dad, and Asher. Perhaps my favorite, to no surprise, is the Lawyer’s Dictionary that Harry got me. It has a section for all of the law jargon, another on many important laws, and lastly finishes with a guide for working the courtroom. I was just getting on my tippy toes to grab it when I feel a pair of arms surround my chest and pull me against theirs. 

“Hiya, brat,” a voice teases, tickling my neck. 

“Harry!” I exclaim with surprise, grabbing hold of his forearms. “Why do you love to scare me so much?”

“I dunno, ‘s fun, and coz yer a brat, so ya deserve it,” he giggles, and finally I relent and do too as I turn around to face him. 

“I am not a brat!” I argue, finding his flushed stubbly cheeks, taking a second to get used to the thick stubble covering them now. 

“Ya are, I reckon, couldn’t even wake me up last night t’ finish tha rest o’ tha FRIENDS episode on FaceTime, jus’ kept watchin’ along without me. If that doesn’t make ya a brat, then I dunno what does,” he tuts, clucking his tongue as he shakes his head at me. My giggles grow into a hearty chuckle as his folded hands settle at the small of my back. 

“Harry Edward!” I scoff, swatting at his chest once again hidden by his Northface coat, matching his black skinny jeans. 

“Hey, ya betta watch that hand o’ yers, bug, and that mouth too.”

“I’m not a brat,” I whine, all facial features falling into a pout that immediately grabs his attention. 

“Rebecca Ann, don’t even start with me. Put that bloody pout away befo’ ya regret it,” he insists, pointing his eyes at me with the smallest of smirks peeking through on his lips. It wins him over and soon his dimples accompany his deep laugh. “Stop, yer not a brat, bug, ‘m jus’ teasin’ ya. Y’know that. Jus’ can’t believe it didn’t even take a week fer ya t’ skip ahead o’ me in our show.”

“The episode was already three quarters of the way over!” I protest, earning a good finger wag at me. I fight back and push against his chest. “And I didn’t want to wake you up, you were so tired.”

“No, it was not! It was only half way through and ya couldn’t even wake me up! How rude o’ my Becks t’ be makin’ up excuses.” 

“Stop being mean to me,” I pout again, beginning to turn away with my arms crossed over my chest. 

“Hey, ‘m jus’ givin' ya a hard time, bug, y’know that. Yer neva a brat, and even if ya are, yer my brat,” Harry hums warmly, the honey returning to his voice in full force as he catches me around the middle with his arms once again. I can’t remember the last time I heard his voice absent of the honey, though. I don’t ever want to. “I wouldn’t want ya any otha way.”

“I knew you were only joking.”

“You li’l liar!” he laughs against my temple and mine joins his ever so contagious one. “Y’know, ‘ve always loved how ya neva take me shit and how ya can dish it right back, Becks.”

“Of course, I figured out at  the very beginning that I wouldn’t get by without it.”

“That’s me girl,” he coos, bringing me forth and round to find his gentle green eyes once more. They smile at me with a sparkle to them I haven’t had the pleasure to know before. I’ve yet to see him look at anybody this way, and I wonder if I have my own special look in my eyes for him, too. If I do, it was born long ago. 

“What are you doing here? I thought you had said you were going to take it easy until Monday, since your case got done early,” I wonder aloud, unsure of what to do with my hands until they venture to his coat’s zipper on their own, pulling it up and down distractedly. 

“I was, until My’ roped me into a partner meetin’ t’day, and I wanted t’ see a special sumbody,” he sighs with an accented roll of his eyes at first, and then they dish out their dazzle on me. “But that’s it, and ‘m off afta that. I hafta do a li’l work fer my case afta finishin’ it, but it’ll only take ten minutes tops. Then laundry, cleanin’, and tha like at home before grocery shoppin’. Only jus’ now got outta bed, tha bloody jetlag.”

“Ah, I see. The work of a lawyer never ends, it seems,” I comment and he nods above me, eyes watching my every move closely. “God, if I knew you’d be here today I would have tried a little harder when I got dressed this morning,” I laugh nervously, my eyes falling to his crimson button-up peeking out from his coat, decorated with gray flowers and foliage. 

“Ya don’t even hafta try and ya look gorgeous, Becks. Promise,” Harry disagrees, the molasses pouring out from his words and into my heart, pushing the very last chip away. Just like that, I’m all his again, but I think it happened long before this and I didn’t know. Daring a look up at him, the dimples couldn’t be deeper in his cheeks as his sunshine smile radiates onto me, the pad of his thumb rough against my cheek. “I sure missed seein’ that smile, ‘s me favourite.” 

My anxiousness carries away with the sunshine, and I’m left with red cheeks and a smile that makes them hurt. It almost pains me to look into his bright sunny eyes, but I wouldn’t want to be looking anywhere else. Finally, I let myself look and with that, I let him in a little further and start to let go. 

“You’re really laying it on thick,” I jest harmlessly with a smile, dragging my finger down the seam of his chest where the two sides of the fabric meet in red cloth buttons. 

“Ya, coz I finally can,” he grins, and the warmth spreading across my body in tingly waves finds an outlet in a soft laugh of mine. 

Anxious yes, but ever so happy while his hand spreads out flush against my back, fingertips moving lazily. I’ve already pinched myself once or twice today wondering if this is all a dream, and shocked that I could ever be this happy. There were so many times I doubted the existence of it and its possibility, and everything it had to do with having this with Harry. Predictably, an electronic twinkle interrupts our conversation, and I’m confused to find him lifting his wrist. 

“Woah, look at the fancy lawyer,” I tease, his already colossal smile growing taller as he flicks a finger across his shiny new Apple watch. “That must have cost a pretty penny.”

“Ya, and My’ dished out e’ry last cent,” he titters, pressing his palm to the shiny surface rounded by space grey edges, returning his eyes and hands to me. “It was his birthday present t’ me, sayin’ that I should be mo’ organized at me age, or sumthin’.”

“Talk about brutal honesty right there.”

“Don’t go bloody agreein’ with him now!” Harry scoffs, but his mouth open in disgust is no more, lined by joyous lips that soon attack my cheeks in kisses. 

“No, no, no!” I beg aloud in shrieks when his quick fingers dance along my ribs, sending jolts of electricity across my body. More exclamations and pleas escape them before I say the magic words, “Harry Edward!” 

“What d’ya want, hmm, Rebecca Ann?” he asks breathlessly, that adorable breathy laugh falling off of his glossy cherry lips. 

“I think you like saying my full name too much,” I contend, giving up and falling into the sage green abyss of his eyes for the hundredth time, or more. 

“Maybe I do. Maybe I like it,” he shrugs mischievously, that smirk glued to his lips that pull me in. 

“Do you like it, the watch?”

“Ya, ‘s nice. I thought ‘d told ya ‘bout it, sorry. Reckon it has helped me t’ stay organized. Speakin’ of, me meetin’ ‘s inna few, so I hafta take off, bug,” he croons with disapproving lips, his bottom lip soon jutting out from the top. 

“Harry Styles, don’t you even!” I threaten rather weakly, the sounds of happiness leaving my lips doing a good job of that. 

“Oh, and what if I don’t? Hmmm, Rebecca Holte, jus’ what will ya do ‘bout it?” Harry returns, wiggling an eyebrow at me that makes my chest rumble with harder laughter. 

“I’ll just have to stop you, but I don’t know how just yet.”

A devilish smirk is born on his lips before my eyes, and soon leaves my view while his face escapes to the crook of my neck, his voice soon tickling my skin, “Lawyers gotta be quick on their feet, bug. Reckon I can think o’ a way ya can make these lips stop poutin’, maybe ya can try it on me t’morro’ afta our date,” he hums against my neck, knitting up his sentence with a whisper of a kiss below my ear.

I feel like a fricken sixteen-year-old all over again, and I’m loving every second. 

“You better get going to your meeting, before you’re late, Harry,” I giggle uncontrollably,  sure that my face is blotchy with red all over because of what he just said. My suspicion is confirmed when he lifts his head of moused curls to look me in the eyes again, and the glint in them tells me so. I feel like I can read him even better now, all because he’s letting me. 

“‘s alright, they expect me t’ be late by now, ‘s a given,” he insists with a comedic shrug of his shoulders, hands wandering away from my back and to our sides where they invite my hands into his. 

“Will you stop and say goodbye this time?”

“‘Course, bug. ‘m sorry I missed ya yestaday, ya had already left afta I had made me rounds,” he assures me, receiving a quiet ‘it’s okay’ from me. 

“Try not to fall asleep at your meeting today,” I joke, watching his eyes roll into the back of his head briefly before he scoops me into his arms for a squeeze. 

“I won’t if ya promise not t’ be a brat anymo’ and skip ahead in our show.”

“Get lost and go to your meeting already!” I laugh, shoving him away by his chest, observant of his mouth relaxing into a disbelieving ‘O’. His laugh echoes mine quickly, only disrupted when my hand comes to his cheek to plant my lips on his other for a few seconds longer than necessary. “I’m so glad you’re back, Harry.”

“So am I, Becks, so bloody much,” he echoes, holding my hands a little tighter in his, even bringing one to his lips for a kiss. “Good luck on yer case, love, for tha thousandth time. ‘m so proud o’ you.”

With that, he leaves me in a puddle of my own surreal emotions, disappearing from my office with a look over his shoulder wearing that smirk. That very smirk I want so desperately to kiss off those cherry lips already. Tomorrow, I think, if I can make it until then. Just one more day.

+

I had been struggling with finishing this last part, or rather redoing it, for too long now. When my eyes again strayig to the violet clock, I was surprised to find that it had been almost an hour, and I hadn’t gotten much further. With my head in my hands, I sigh as feelings battle to be felt within my insides. After today’s argument, Myles and I had to shift our approach, and I still wasn’t sure of how to do that. He had been helping me, of course, but I still felt so lost. It doesn’t help that he’s currently caught up in the partner’s meeting that Harry is also at, and Jennings who is but isn’t a partner. I still don’t get it, even though Harry explained it to me a few times. The next time he does, I’ll have to remember to ask him to dumb it down for me. 

Even after pouring over our shared notes in Google Docs, and my several law books strewn across my desk, I’m at a loss for what to do.

I wish more than anything that it was already five pm tomorrow, and that the only thing I have to think about is my date with Harry. I still don’t know what the hell to wear, or to do with my hair, or how heavy to go with my makeup. 

“Why tha long face, bug?” somebody pipes up, pulling me away from my immersive thoughts. Blinking hard, I tear my eyes away from the laptop screen and look over to the door, but I don’t lift my tired head from my propped fist. 

“I don’t know what to do for my argument.”

“Still? Why didn’t ya jus’ ask, Becks?” Harry hums with an inviting smile, pressing the door to come just shy of closing. 

I shrug my shoulders with a heavy exhale, scrolling through what I have so far, quickly realizing how embarrassing it’ll be to show him. I can’t exit out quickly enough, hearing his footsteps arrive behind me. 

“Hey, what d’ya think yer doin’?” he teases when I switch tabs, quickly feeling the weight of his hand on top of mine, dragging the mouse along. “Don’t be nervous, love, ‘m here t’ help. Always am,” he coos softly, a hand settling on my adjacent shoulder, earning me an encouraging squeeze. 

“It’s embarrassing, Harry. I’ve been sitting here for over an hour trying to figure out what to do, and I have next to nothing to show for it.”

“Relax, ‘s only yer first official case yer arguin’. Don’t be so hard on yerself, Becks. It sounds like ya need a break, bug,” he insists, sending sparks along my left arm as he rubs stripes along the skin. It’s not long before I hear a familiar laugh and slowly, Harry’s dancing figure comes into view. “Yo ‘ll tell ya what I want, what I really, really want. So tell me what ya want, what ya really, really want,” he belts out, his phone blasting the song cupped in his hand. 

“Oh my God,” I sigh with an accidental laugh, my head falling into my hands. I’m too curious though, and so I peek out from behind my spread fingers to watch him sing passionately with his eyes closed while breaking out some amusing dance moves. “Please, stop,” I chuckle, but I’m sure he also hears the lie in my voice. 

“‘m not stoppin’.”

“Please, Harry. You’re going to make me die from secondhand embarrassment,” I confess into my hands, feeling brave and letting my fingers fall down to below my eyes. Mistakenly, his catch mine and they fly back up to cover my eyes, or for the most part. 

“Rebecca Ann, ‘m not stoppin’ ‘til ya come and join me.”

“Then you’re going to be there for a while,” I say with a shrug of my shoulders, certain of one thing and that’s the smile claiming my lips, and the forgotten document staring at me. I’m too preoccupied with the silly, dancing man in front of my eyes, and how somehow this makes me love him all the more. 

“Becks,” he insists, in between singing along to the song very badly. Oh no, I think as his steps near me once again. Before I know it, I’m staring into darkness as his breath tickles the back of my neck. 

“Stop,” I beg with laughs interjected among my pleas. They grow into near shouts and exclamations when his singing is accompanied by his fingers dancing across my sides, and along the slopes of my neck. “Harry!” I almost yell, and when my laughs couldn’t hurt my belly more, it all ceases. Only the singing remains and is joined by his stubbly cheek against my temple, and his arms coiled around my shoulders. “If ya wanna be my lova, ya gotta get with my friends.”

“Make it last forever, friendship never ends,” I continue for him, giggles heard at the end when his nose tickles the corner of my sensitive neck. 

“There’s me happy Becks, ‘m glad I found her ‘gain,” Harry coos, leaving a kiss on my temple before he helps me to tackle my argument. 

Five days did and didn’t feel very long when I think about it now, with his arms wrapped around me as his voice tickles my ear. Too easily, I can remember his absence over those long days, and how effortlessly they felt far longer. I barely survived with his texts and phone calls alone, and it hurts to think that if it hadn’t been for his case finishing early, I’d still be sitting here in my office all in my lonesome. 

Those thoughts are yanked away - thank God - when his voice brings me back, spewing legal mumbo jumbo that luckily nowadays I can understand, but I couldn’t have always said that. Harry makes quick work of what would be my best route to take and how I do that, and for the fiftieth time in the last two days, I couldn’t be more grateful for how easy things are coming together. I couldn’t be more thankful to have him by my side. It still feels like a dream getting to live this life now, and getting to work with him on the daily, singing Spice Girls amidst stolen cheek kisses.

One puzzle piece at a time, and there’s only one or two pieces left in this puzzle of ours.

+

The murmur of voices assaults my ears when I walk through the door, and feel my vision tugged towards the ceiling decorated with chandeliers. A song by Frank Sinatra floats around the entryway, hardly calming my overactive nerves, despite it being a favorite of my late grandpa’s. When I finally reach the host’s stand, the nerves topple out with my words, jumbling them.

“Reservation for H-Harry Styles, please,” I tell the towering, dark haired man. After a few moments tapping away on the kiosk, he grabs two menus and leads me through a maze of linen covered tables sat under the glow of the several chandeliers. 

I try to hide my disappointment when he leads me to an empty, round table, leaving with a few words about my server being with me soon. Another feeling bubbles up inside me, forcing itself to join all of the others mixed together within me. I had a feeling I was too early, I think silently as I shrug off my long pea coat to hang over my chair. Skye’s wishes of good luck and ‘lots of snogging’ float back to me, filling my sad cheeks with another wash of pink. ‘No, you aren’t driving yourself, I’m dropping you off so then you can get a ride home with him, and lay a big one on him when he walks you up,’ she had insisted, but the anxiousness years in the making is doing a good job of making me doubt myself tonight. 

My attention drifts to my phone that is silent with no new messages, but I still check our conversation. The last message was from him:

see u in half an hour for our date bug :) xxx

My thumb scrolls through our previous messages, straying to last night’s that brings a smile to my face. 

I have no idea what to wear tomorrow :/ 

meant it when i said u look beautiful in anything Becks ;) help what should i wear ? xx

I might be a little impartial to that gray suit you wore to my class lecture that one time ;) 

noted ;) i may especially love the color red on u if u wanna know 

Noted ;) Question....

shoot, love 

Skye was gonna drop me off tonight on her way to her boyfriend’s …. Would a ride home be too much to ask?

course not Becks. anytime u need a ride im here. id love to give u a ride home. perfect we can jam 2 some spice girls in the car then ;) 

I can’t wait

neither can i bug :) 

My reminiscing is interrupted when my eyes fall to my outfit of choice, tugging up the scoop neck that Skye insisted wasn’t ‘too slutty.’ Now, I’m not so sure about it, and I can’t decide if I wish he’d show up already, or if I’m not ready. Those thoughts are stolen away when the texts disappear on my phone, his smiling face claiming the screen with a jingle. 

“Hello?” I answer with a gulp, trying to hide the anxious tremble in my voice. I can’t help it, my eyes dart to my wrist, noticing it’s already 6:05 pm.

“Hi, bug. ‘m sorry but tha traffic ‘s horrendous and ‘m afraid ‘ll be late gettin’ t’ tha restaurant. E’rybody else ‘s comin’ home from work too,” Harry explains from the other side, a weird sound taking over his voice. Yeah, we’re not too good at this pretending thing anymore, are we? I can hear the nerves in his voice, probably just like he can hear them in mine. 

“Oh, it’s okay, Harry. I don’t mind at all, just be careful driving,” I respond, feeling a sense of relief at knowing where he is. I know he never would, but it squashes the tiny voice inside of me saying he wasn’t ever going to show up. 

“‘Course I will, love. Thanks fer understandin’. Reckon ‘ll be there in ten. Are ya there already?” he responds, just the sound of his voice doing wonders at calming me down. The only thing that could take it all away is a hug, one of his.

“Yeah, I just sat down.”

“Mmmm, d’ya mind scopin’ out tha menu while yer there? I won’t be too long, we can order once I get there, if that’s alright,” he asks, the sound of traffic sneaking into our phone call for a second. Then, I hear him sigh ‘finally’ and the subsequent thrum of the motor.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll see you soon then, careful driving.”

“I can’t wait t’ see you, Becks,” he hums before hanging up, leaving me sitting across from an empty chair that I can’t stop picturing him sitting in. 

This is really happening.

Finally.

+

The sound of her voice rings in my ears, and does nothing to stop the anxious shakes coursing throughout my body. Curses fall under my breath as I honk at somebody who pulls out right in front of me, making me slam on my brakes. With a sigh, I turn on my indicator before making my turn.

Pulling my keys from the ignition drenches my surroundings in silence, and reminds me of my heart beating wildly within my chest. Looking up, the decorative windows of the restaurant appear before me in shrouded light. She’s somewhere in there . . waiting for me.

Get it together, Harry. You can do this.

My eyes drift to the rear view mirror and I card my fingers through my hair until it looks decent enough. That’s as good as it’s going to get, I almost mutter while smoothing down my blazer underneath my coat. The bone chilling February night nips at my face once my feet touch the tarmac. Streetlights cast glows all around me, as well as the headlights of several cars. The thumping within my chest grows louder and faster as my feet near the door, and then the stand where a manicured man waits.

“Hi. I made a reservation unda the name ‘Harry Styles’,” I tell him, immediately casting my eyes to the tables within view, searching for her dark chocolate locks. 

“Right this way,” he replies, waving a hand to follow him and I do. He leads me past several tables, empty and occupied, and almost gets me lost in the process.

The last thing I feel is lost when my eyes finally find her.

“Thank you. I-I got it from here,” I tell him hurriedly, holding a hand out that brings us both to a halt. He walks away after a short ‘you’re welcome,’ leaving me there, right where I want to be.

I don’t remember the smile reaching my ears or my heart quieting within my chest as I watch her flip through the menu thirty feet away from me. The prettiest red dress dons her long body, falling just underneath her collarbones and draped over the curve of her shoulders. Her hair falls in dark, natural waves, almost hiding the round opal sitting above the scoop of scarlet fabric. A tingling sensation blankets my body from head to toe, and the image of Becks sitting there waiting for me is burned into my mind.

It feels like I’m meeting her again for the first time, but I’m not. This feels like a new first time, and I know it’s one I won’t ever forget, much like the very first time I laid my eyes upon her. 

It felt like a Monday. For the bloody life of me, I couldn’t remember if it was one at the moment. Is it Monday? I’m not sure, but with the way things were going today, it sure felt like one. The copier had a jam, I forgot the first lunch I’ve made in years at home, and my girlfriend had been annoying the fuck out of me this morning. To top it all off, I had applicants being interviewed today to fill the position of my personal assistant, ever since the last one bolted. She didn’t last more than two weeks, a big surprise. 

Pete had been blowing up my phone for the last ten minutes, and I finally had had enough. Without an announcement or a knock, I stride into his office, fully intent on finding out what the hell he wants. 

“I’m a little busy, if you haven’t noticed,” he retorts over the head of dark chestnut locks sat in front of him. Presumably, one of the new applicants for my personal assistant. Hmm. 

“Well, ya kept ringin’ me bloody phone, Pete. So, what tha hell d’ya want?” I insist, throwing up a hand that falls to my thigh with a loud slap. 

Suddenly, I wish the quiet little thing would turn around, and give me a look at her. Shy, she is, it seems. There she sits, tucked away into her little shell, dressed to impress in a dark dress. 

“I’m in the middle of an interview!” he exclaims, certainly making a good first impression with the applicant. It makes me wonder for the tenth time why I bother having him do the interviews, but then I remember that I don’t really give a fuck, as long as I don’t have to do them. 

“What fer, huh?” I tease, instantly getting a snappy response from Pete about it being for me, as if I didn’t already know. But, I did, and am only doing this to bother him even more. 

“Ooo, ‘s it now? Ya get me a good one? Huh, Pete?” I grin, taking a step forward as a hand in my pocket plays with the tiny, metal guitar attached to my key ring. Sticking my head out as I move forward, my eyes dance across her head, and her profile that soon comes into view. “Hullo, love. Gonna be me new one, are ya? Petey here says I can’t keep one fer tha life o’ me, so here he ‘s interviewin’ me anotha one. How’s she doin’ so far, Petey? Think she’s a winna?” I joke aloud, knowing full well the effect my words have on the both of them. 

My subsequent introduction falls from my lips after a retort from Pete, and then the stranger finally turns to look me in the eyes. I rack my brain, trying to put a name to her face from a prior conversation with Pete. Or was it going over her resume when it came in the other day? I can’t remember which, and I blame it on her captivating baby blue eyes, as well as the intoxicating smile that greets my own. Words float from her lips and grace my ears for the very first time, and I knew immediately that she was something else. 

“Hi, my name is Becky. Becky Holte.”

Little did I know how drastically she would change my life, sometimes I thought for the worse, but ultimately for the better. The better, always. I had no way of knowing at that very moment, how many times she would come to save me.

My Becks.

+

The sound of homemade ravioli filled with chicken and three kinds of cheese is almost making my mouth water. It also makes me wonder when Harry will finally be here, and habitually, my eyes lift to look for him. To my surprise, I find him standing a ways away with the sweetest smile stuck to his lips. 

“Hiya, Becks. Sorry ‘m late. Ya look . . absolutely gorgeous, by tha way,” he comments once he’s within a few steps of the table. He reaches across to squeeze my arm before sitting down across from me, a blush pinching his cheeks. 

“Thank you, Harry. I uh, like the suit you went with, you look very handsome in it. Good choice,” I return, failing to not focus on the fast thrumming deep inside of me. 

“Ya, a certain sumbody said it was their favourite on me, so I couldn’t disappoint,” he grins with a shrug, unfastening the button at his waist, exposing the satiny black button-up hidden underneath. 

“Good, I’m glad you didn’t,” I smile, sure of the warmth he can see filling my cheeks, because I can see it mirrored in his own. “I like that you kept the stubble.”

“Why thank you,” he comments, once again rubbing it with his thumb and forefinger, and like before, making me all the more jealous. “I trimmed it up a li’l bit, figured I betta.” 

“Oh, I hope you keep it. I think I prefer you with it.”

“D’ya now, Becks?” he teases with a lift of his eyebrows, his tousled curls almost tickling his forehead, but just barely. “‘ll hafta rememba that,” he smiles, and more than ever, it’s incredibly contagious. My cheeks are starting to hurt from smiling by now, but I don’t even mind. 

“The um,” I begin nervously, my eyes falling to the elegant paper menu opened in front of me. It pains me to look away from him and the sunshine emanating from his smile, but it’s not so bad when I feel his chelsea boot knock against my heel, remaining there against the back of my ankle. “Chicken ravioli sounds good, as well as the margherita pizza, and Cacio e Pepe. Lots of good choices for dessert, too.”

“Mmm, they all sound good, love. Thanks fer lookin’ fer us,” he muses aloud, head bent down to peer at the menu when I glance over to him. 

His habit returns and his bottom lip is caught between his teeth, and somehow, it makes my smile grow bigger. I didn’t think that was possible, but here I am with aching cheeks. I nudge his foot with mine and he looks up with a question on his face, soon relaxing into a sparkling smile. That effervescent look in his eyes from the other day returns, and if I hadn’t known it already, I truly could look into his eyes for the rest of eternity. The dimples haven’t left his cheeks since he arrived, and his raspberry lips beg at me from across the table. 

“Let’s give it a try then,” he remarks, closing his menu without breaking our eye contact. The words dipped in honey flow from his lips and tickle something inside me, and I want more than anything to hear another meaning in them. His foot nudging at mine in return only makes me give in to it, and so does his wink. 

Our server arrives at our table shortly, and I thank God for the champagne she pours into tall flutes, not taking the edge off fast enough. A conversation blossoms between us about his case, and then mine with Myles. 

“Ya did great by tha way. Congrats on tha win, Becks, ‘m so fookin’ proud o’ you,” Harry grins adamantly, sweetness pouring off of his words that come out with a shake of his head. 

“Thank you so much, Harry. Wait, how’d you know we won it? I was just going to tell you,” I ask with furrowed brows, and receive a measly shrug of his shoulders in return. The look on his face, as if a revelation is threatening to burst from his lips, teases at me until it abates when the server brings us waters and we order. 

“So so bloody proud o’ you t’day, Becks,” he whispers as she pulls out her notepad and a pen. Possibilities blossom within my mind after he sends me a coy wink and knocks his foot against mine again. It doesn’t leave my own throughout the rest of our time there, during our meal and the laughs we share over glasses of champagne, and a plate of Tiramisu that I somehow let him share with me.

+

“I knew it! You were there today, sitting in the gallery, weren’t you?!” I exclaim, mumbling a short ‘thank you’ when he opens the car door for me. 

“Maybe,” Harry shrugs casually, walking around the front of the car as I fall onto the leather seat. 

“Harry Styles!” I nearly shout, if it weren’t for my voice dissolving into a giggle as he slides behind the steering wheel next to me. 

“What? I had some stuff t’ do at tha courts, so I may have popped in fer a mo’,” he explains. 

“Sure,” is all I say as I pull the seat belt across my chest. 

“Hush, and play some music, bug. Here,” he insists, handing me his grey iPhone that looks normal sized in his hand, and then gigantic in mine. 

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming to watch?”

“Coz o’ that right there, Becks. Yer nervous ‘bout it right now afta tha fact, imagine how ya woulda been if ‘d told ya I was comin’ befo’ yer argument t’day,” he returns, pressing buttons on the dash and soon, waves of hot air greet my cold body. 

“I guess you’re right.”

“‘m what? I didn’t catch that,” Harry jests, cupping his ear. A scoff flies from my lips and I playfully swat his shoulder. “Hey, watch it. ‘m drivin’.”

“You haven’t even switched gears, so shut up,” I laugh, catching the eye roll he thinks I don’t see. “I see that eye roll, Styles, you better watch it.”

“You betta watch it, Becks. Betta pick a good Spice Girls song too, ‘m payin’ attention,” he jokes, soon his fingers diving into my side. A laugh escapes me unwillingly, and yanks my eyes over to his giggling lips. 

His name leaves mine in a near shriek, and after a blink, his tickling fingers are gone and lacing between mine. The dark flecks in his sage green eyes catch under the overhead light before it turns off automatically. He gives my hand a good squeeze as his eyes melt into mine, and a zing of electricity runs up my fingers and then my arm. The smile falling into his cheeks mirrors the one that’s been glued to my lips all night, and now grows higher and higher. I return the squeeze just as he looks to his mirrors, the click of the doors locking when he shifts to Reverse. 

It almost hurts to look away, but so many other feelings and thoughts are occupying me as my eyes fall to his phone. Disbelief washes over me as his long, ringed fingers sit between mine. It only grows when he lifts our intertwined hands up and over the middle console, to sit on his warm thigh.

An uninvited wave of pain hits me when I spot familiar sad songs amongst his music library, like the familiar ‘When She Loved Me’ that could make any Toy Story fan weep within seconds of hearing it. It intensifies when my eyes run over the songs Before You Go, Wish You Were Here, Say You Won’t Let Go, and With or Without You. Chancing a glance over at him, he stares straight ahead into the dark night, and a bittersweetness greets me. I try not to let it in, and the realization that perhaps those lost seven months were hell for him too, as were those five days apart. 

“Find it? I have Spice World on there sumwhere. I know I have loads o’ shit on there, sorry,” he comments, turning his head to check his left before pulling onto the busy road. 

“Y-Yeah,” I stutter, looking back to his expansive music library spanning from the 50’s to current music. His thumb drawing circles onto my knuckles brushes some of the sadness away as I bring up the album he speaks of. 

“Bloody hell, why ya choosin’ tha sad one, Becks?” he titters, glancing over to me when we come to a stop at a light. His smile shining back at me whisks away the last drops of the sadness, but hints of it remain with me, begging to be felt. I shrug my shoulders as the beginning lyrics of ‘Too Much’ fills the car, and I only turn it up louder. “I get t’ pick tha next song, if yer playin’ sad stuff. Bloody rubbish you are at pickin’ songs,” he sighs jokingly with a shake of his head, curls tickling his ears and the nape of his neck. 

“I am not!” 

“‘Kay, brat, keep talkin’,” he snickers, earning another scoff from me that he answers with a harder laugh. I cast my eyes to the window with an exaggerated whimper, soon hearing his profuse apologies. “‘m kiddin’, Becks, bloody hell. I already know ya have a good taste in music from all o’ our talks. I like this song too, jus’ thought ya’d go fer some happy songs, seein’ tha . . occasion and e’rythin’. Hey.” 

I answer him with my eyes returning to him, finding his wink before he looks back to traffic, and with my thumb coasting back and forth across his smooth skin. I listen to the lyrics, feeling another squeeze of my hand from him before I change the song. 

“Hey, don’t change it befo’ ‘s done!” he exclaims, and I just laugh, watching his shocked lips soon do the same. 

“Then stop complaining,” I argue, catching another roll of his eyes as the car slows to a stop in front of another light. Joy buds on my lips as the surprise unfolds on his features, meanwhile his eyes crinkle, the dimples fall deeper, and his raspberry lips thin out as a smile consumes his face. 

“I knew ya were sumthin’ special,” he notes aloud with a shake of his head, a giggle emanating from his joyous smile, right before he joins me to sing along to Shania Twain’s ‘Man, I Feel Like A Woman.’ 

His fingers laced between mine continue to send my heart into overdrive as we belt out the song between contagious laughs, and then another crowd favourite, ‘You’re Still The One.’ This one gets me and sometimes throughout the song, I can’t get myself to look at him with the sincerity held in the lyrics. As well as the words that hit too close to home. 

Finally, I can’t stand it anymore, and my eyes drift over to his at the end of the song, finding that his are already on mine. “‘m so glad we made it. Look how far we’ve come, my baby,” Harry finishes with his eyes dancing upon me with that smile dripping with molasses. As if his hand squeezing mine periodically throughout the song wasn’t already making me want to cry, now I really could. I return the gesture before looking out the window, blinking back the arriving tears from my eyes as those lasting words sing inside of my head. 

Yeah, we finally made it, Harry. Belatedly, but finally.

+

“‘s been years since ‘ve been here, hasn’t changed much tho’,” Harry remarks softly, only a few steps away from my door. 

“Yeah, the inside looks bout the same too.”

“‘m sure. Maybe I could see fer meself one o’ these days,” he remarks aloud, and when my eyes drag over to his nervously, I answer him with a nod. 

“I’d like that.”

“Me too,” he coos, rubbing the pad of his thumb along the back of my hand. A shy smile nudges at the edge of my lips as he stands in front of me, my right hand still safe within his. “Well, I had a wondaful time t’night, thanks again.”

“You’re welcome, and thank you too. I had a lot of fun . . with you.”

“So did I, bug. ‘ll um, text you later then?” Harry says, clearing his throat awkwardly, his bottom lip soon returning to its nervous spot. 

“Y-yeah, sounds good,” I mumble quietly, eyes falling to my hand that he drops. The absence of his warmth against mine feels very strange now, having been holding hands for the entire drive and subsequent walk up to my apartment. 

“Night, Becks.”

“Goodnight, Harry, careful driving,” is the last thing I say before slipping behind my door, finding Skye perched on the sofa. The monotonous, forced words echo in my ears and my eyes fall to the floor, disappointment flooding every inch of me. 

“So, how’d it go?! Did you finally fucking kiss him?!” she shouts the second the door meets its frame. 

“No,” I admit between shy lips, the steps I take seeming as if they’re from somebody else’s body, not mine. The entire last five minutes feels like somebody else had lived them, not me. No, it can’t end like that. “Not yet, anyways,” I rush, ignoring my shoes I already toed off, spinning around and ripping open the door. “Harry, wait!” I exclaim, finding his surprised expression waiting in front of the lift. 

“What?” he asks, eyebrows bent into a questioning mess. 

“I-I forgot something,” I manage, the words spilling out in a heap while he closes the distance between us, stopping right in front of me. Right where I need him. 

“Forgot what, bug? Did ya forget yer shoes in me car?” he titters, the fluorescent glow overhead picking out the few blonde hairs in his stubble. 

“No . . something else,” I finally admit, taking a step when there aren’t any left. 

The dimples remain set into his cheeks while his eyes fall to my lips and mine raise to his. His facial hair is prickly and dense under the pad of my thumb, and his coveted bottom lip is warm and pillowy. The golden hue of his olive green irises fills my mind when my lips finally meet his, and at last, I find his bottom lip between my own. His sweet giggle sounds against my lips as my fingers get lost in his buttery curls. I come to echo it when his hands shock me with their coldness against my hips, pulling me closer to him. One strays to the back of my head as his lips move against mine, the word ‘finally’ repeating incessantly within my mind. His barely there beard is scratchy against my skin, contrasting to the smooth tip of his nose grazing my cheek. The cinnamon and cocoa powder from the Tiramisu cake tickles my taste buds while his spicy vanilla smell covers me like a blanket. Zings shoot across my palm pressed to his smiling cheek, his facial hair prickly against the sensitive skin. 

Not feeling like what was actually mere seconds later, air fills my lungs when we pull away at the same time, sharp inhales filling the air. Quickly, his sweet giggle joins it, and ropes one of my own in. The tip of his nose leaves trails on my cheek as his forehead falls onto mine. 

“Ya have no idea how long ‘ve waited fer that,” Harry rasps, his warm breath dancing across my lips. His own press a whisper of a kiss to mine briefly, although after that, now I’m sure it could never be long enough. 

“I think I do know,” I mumble, my hand straying to his chin where I brush the tip of my thumb against the flesh of his bottom lip. 

“‘m sorry it took us so long, bug.”

“It’s okay, we’re here now. Finally,” I tell him and he nods, the twinkle in his eye bright as can be. For the first time, I let myself melt and lose myself in the greens of his eyes. Something I have wanted to do ever since the very first time I looked into his green eyes and knew I was fucked. 

“Yes, we are. And look at you, Becks. Ya beat me t' tha first date and tha first kiss,” he smirks with a decadent laugh adorning his words. I can’t help but join him while I twirl a ringlet of his hair around the tip of my finger against the back of his neck. 

“Oh, it’s okay, Harry. You got the first hand hold, and the first Shania Twain car duet.”

A roll of his miraculous eyes accompanies his continuing laugh, “Ya, well, so did you, but I got tha more romantic one,” he insists, words welcomed by my surprised scoff. 

“Wait, you don’t find ‘Man, I Feel Like A Woman’ romantic?!” I nearly exclaim in faux disbelief, my voice softening into a giggle quickly. 

“Only when you sing it, bug,” Harry smiles, thumbing circles into the small of my back. 

“Wait, you got tha first handhold, brat. Rememba, when I visited you at yer old work that day? Bloody hell, you beat me t’ all tha good ones, Becks. No fair,” he snickers with a sigh to his words, the two contrasting the other. I suffice my response with an obligatory nod, feeling my heart just now starting to settle into a regular beat. “Becks, there’s so many things ‘ve wanted t’ say t’ you, and now, I finally can.”

“I think I know how you feel.” 

“First thing ‘ll say ‘s I get tha second date and tha second kiss,” Harry contends with a smirk held in his eyes. 

“Oh, really?” I giggle and he soon nods. He quiets the laugh beginning on my lips with his own giddy ones, my lips molding against his effortlessly. Thoughts blossom quickly within my mind, including why I waited so fucking long to kiss him. If I’d known all of these years how wonderful it feels to kiss him, I never would have waited this long. Our kisses are slow although hurried, our lips searching for the other’s desperately, and somehow perfectly. Years overdue, and it couldn’t feel any more perfect. 

“Fookin’ hell, I jus’ wanna keep kissin’ you, Becks. Dunno if I can stop,” he chuckles, brushing his nose against mine softly. Shockingly, his eyes are even more gorgeous from this view, and I didn’t think that was possible. Evidently, anything is. 

“You don’t have to,” I laugh and he shrugs his shoulders while his eyebrows mimic the expression, his giggle soon vibrating against my tingling lips. 

“We have loads o’ lost time t’ make up fer,” he notes aloud. 

“Yes, we do. A couple years, give or take.”

“Mmmhmm, yer right there, li’l one. Fook, there were so many times I wanted t’ kiss ya ova the years,” he sighs with a sad shake of his head. His dimple is soft under my fingertip, hidden under the warm brunette facial hair. 

“Then kiss me.”

Too soon, his lips leave mine after a short peck, but I press at the back of his curls and envelope his laugh with my lips. My name falls from him in a delighted whisper before one more kiss. Our laughs grow louder only to be muffled, although weakly, when a figure walks by into their nearby apartment. My face runs to the crook of his neck, my very favorite song dancing along my ears as he holds me against him. 

“Nothing to see here, sir,” I joke, and the warmth filling my insides grows at the sound of his happiness. 

“No, I rememba I got tha first handhold that night we went out fer drinks tha first time. Tha night with tha Purple Hazes and all those shots,” Harry insists from above me, and I give him the funniest look when I come out of hiding. 

“You’re still going on about that?” I ask in near disbelief, watching his curls move when he nods his head, dipping to meet my lips with his for a slow kiss. 

“I don’t want this night to end,” I hum against the strawberry color of his decadent mouth. 

“Neither do I, Becks. ‘ve been waitin’ fer it fer so long,” he agrees, the wispiness of his eyelashes ghostlike against my forehead. 

“It’s getting late, and Skye is probably dying to hear how tonight went.”

“Ya betta go and tell tha poor girl then,” he responds, pulling my eyes towards his that sit just a moment away, sending all of the sunshine in my direction. 

“That’s okay?”

“‘Course. I may or may not ring Myles on tha way home t’ tell him all ‘bout it,” he shrugs with a telling lilt to his sing-song voice. The only sound that leaves my lips is an amused laugh that he echoes, and I know that he feels the same way.

At last, I know after over two years that he feels the same way, through and through. 

“We’ll figure out sumthin’ fer this weekend t’getha, sound good?”

“Yeah, sounds great, Harry,” I agree slowly and he nods ever so slightly, leaving kisses starting from my temple and down my cheek. 

“G’night, bug.”

“Night, Harry. Drive careful,” I tell him and once again, he answers me with a nod. 

“I promise, babe.”

“Goodnight,” I almost whisper, the very last breath of the word stolen away by his lips. I wouldn’t want it any other way, I barely am able to think as his lips massage mine between his. His neck is fiery beneath my palms and I’m sure mine is likened to it underneath his fingertips, surges of electricity passing below my skin. The skin is balmy against my blushing cheek when my arms come around his middle, surprising us both with a long hug, before I pull away first. 

“Night, my Becks,” he murmurs against my lips, a shiver running down my spine when he leaves with a final squeeze to my hand. If that didn’t do it, the song flowing from his humming lips sparks memories behind my eyes, but I still can’t figure out where it’s from. But, I know that I have plenty of time to figure it out, and to get all of the kisses that I want from him. 

Fucking finally.

[anothersillyfanblog]

These Days Part Five (Sanders Sides au)

Premise: Virgil is mute (oh and he lives in an attic, he’s always lived there) and life is kinda a tiny bit not right. He starts to realize this, of course, when he gets a secret “forbidden” friend who shares lots of cool (and slightly feral) ideas. There’s a lot more, but that’s the basic thingy. Warnings (some more-so for later parts, but still relevant): abuse, emotional abuse, burns, burn scars, scarring u!Logan, u!Patton, physical violence/injury

Ask me if I need to add any tags.

Part One | Part Six

Virgil was breathing too rapidly, he could hear it, but Remus had to ignore it for now. He squeezed his friend’s hand as they stood on the street corner together. “Come on. Let’s go.”

-

Answers… answers… how does one find ANSWERS in such a scenario as this? Remus was in his room, flopped on a large mountain of beanbags (and plushies) thinking think-ily of what he could do.

Normally, when Remus was actually trying to do something serious, he’d maybe bypass some of his plans by his brother, but… Well Roman was in on this- whatever ‘this’ was- so, he couldn’t. In fact he was actively working against his brother which, well it wasn’t really the first time (if pranks counted), felt kinda weird. And exciting!

Okay, brainstorm. Though every time he thought of the word “brainstorm” it reminded him of that scene from Sharkboy and Lavagirl- HE COULD SUMMON AN ARMY OF SHARKS!

No, Remus, be realistic. Roman would say. Roman- he could use his connection to Roman! Maybe he could disguise hims- nah, let’s be honest, that would never work. But it was still true that his brother knew the family well enough to know their secrets. He could, in theory, just introduce himself as Roman’s brother and ask them exactly what they’re up to.

So there he was. In front of the, well, front door and not climbing up a wall or round the back all sneakily. He didn’t pause to think of what he was going to say because he’s Remus. No, he immediately knocked quickly on the door, grinning ear to ear.

“Hello?” The-man-who-hadn’t-been-tagging-birds asked. Virgil had said that this was probably Patton. Whoever he was, Remus pushed his way in immediately, spying two more clearly shocked men. “Hi! I’m Remus, Roman’s brother? He must’ve mentioned me because I’m awesome.” “Ah.” The-man-who-had-been-tagging-birds (Logan, apparently) frowned. The other man… the mysterious third voice, huh? He had large burn scars coating one side of his face, some breaking out like scales in patches, and scraggly, unkempt hair on the lighter side.

He smiled becomingly, wincing slightly as he did so. “Of course he did. Please, sit down, let me get you a cup of tea.” “Uh, no liquid just bag thanks.” Remus called back, spying Logan adjust his necktie a little. “So… Logan, Patton… hey…” “Hi! Sorry if Logan’s rude (he’s science-y you know), but if there’s anything we can get you at all, let me know.” Patton smiled widely. Logan breathed sharply out his nose, then turned and left the room. “Ah it’s fine!” Remus grinned as he accepted a cup from the third man. “I’m used to being rude to people.”

The unknown guy sat down opposite Remus looking across softly. “So, Remus, you decided to bob down to our humble dwelling today?” “Yeah, thought I should eventually…” Remus fiddled with his sleeves. “Does your brother know?” Patton asked, from next to the sink. The strange man shot him a horrible look. “Yeah, course he does!” Remus grinned.

The man opposite him looked intrigued, then frowned. “You may call me…” he sighed “Prima.” “Can I aaaassskkkk??? Or no? Coz I can very much not ask?” Remus hovered his hands around, not entirely sure what he was asking about, but fairly sure that if it was what he thought- then he was being an ‘insensitive prick’ again. “About my scar?” Prima asked. In the background, Patton looked up from the dishes he’d mindlessly started. “Roman said you were blunt- it was a childhood accident.” He leant back. “Yeah, uh, shouldn’t have asked huh?” Remus fiddled with his sleeve. “No, I understand.”

There was a knock on the door and it burst open loudly. “Hello! Are we all as wond-” Roman stopped in his tracks, eyes wide, then smiled slowly. “Hi Rem, how you doing?” “Howdy BROTHOR” Remus waved “I’m good! Just stewing in ma juices!” Roman nodded, walking towards him and Prima. “Great, brilliant to know. Just wanted to come and say mom and dad want us home early so please, brother.”

Remus grabbed the teabag from the cup and popped it his mouth. “Okay” he grinned, munching. “On ma way.” Prima stood up along with Remus. “Let me show you both out.” “I was gonna do that!” Patton laughed from the sink. Remus stepped out, looking back to wave all friendly-like when Prima stepped closer sternly. “Do stop by again.” He whispered.

The door shut. Roman powerwalked on, expecting Remus to keep up. Remus, however, expected all hell to break loose.

Which it fully did.

“Remus,” Roman pretty much growled “what. The. Fuck?” “I thought it was about time I met your funky friends!” Remus grinned. “No, Remus, no. You don’t get it.” The older twin screamed “you have no IDEA what is going on and- and you just run in like the idiot you are, they’ll know, Remus, they’ll know you weren’t meant to be there!” The ‘idiot’ scoffed “Yeah, you right. I got no clue why there’s some kid locked in a fucking attic or, no, why you’re so pally-pally with the strange bird-tagging guys.” He looked his brother dead in the eyes. “But I’d love to.” Roman screamed into his hands in frustration “You don’t get it!” “I have no fucking clue what IT is! Kidnapping a child?” “No, it’s…” Roman bit his lip “you wouldn’t get it.” He spat. Remus laughed “Oh right, I never get anything, do I? Coz of the brilliant five fucking min-” “No!” Roman protested “You won’t get it because- because I don’t really get it.” He admitted. “Look, you know about this- which wasn’t meant to happen but whatever- you also know about Virgil-” “There’s more to this shit than Virgil?” Remus interrupted. “Yes! No? Let me talk, ok.” 

Roman sighed. “I don’t know, I know Virgil is a student. What’s important is he’s different from us, ok? And he lives with them and it’s a weird situation but I can’t tell you everything because it’s very sensitive to them and their household. Virgil has lived there for his whole life- he has been safe, he is safe and he always will be, ok?” “You know what I got from that?” “What?” “He, a young’un, has been trapped inside for his ENTIRE LIFE!”

Then, Roman crossed a little tiny line. He grabbed Remus’ shoulders. And, instinctively and without giving a shit about whatever his brother was about to say, Remus jerked back then immediately drove Roman into a wall. He heard something break, bones probably, and jumped back.

His older brother groaned, but tried to stand up “You… don’t. Please, Remus, just… leave this alone for once… don’t do what- what I think you’re about to.” “Yeah, I’m sorry- about the bones and for this.” He gestured vaguely “because yes. I absolutely AM about to do what you think I am.” “Remus… no…” “Remus yes.”

-

He climbed up, then knocked firmly (but quietly) on the glass window. Roman was right- they had just gotten suspicious. Which made this Remus’ last chance to do this and do this properly.

Virgil opened it. So what are we going to do tonight? I did maybe think Smash Bros but… Virgil then shrugged. “I need you to run away with me.”

—————————————————————

Honestly if you don’t know the “Brainstorm” scene, look it up. It’s GOLD.  Other notes of the day include the fact Roman and Remus are around 17 in this and Virgil’s age is complicated, but let’s say he’s about the same age. Also REMUS NO-

Taglist: @the-pastel-kitsune @night-luna @suicidaltrashbag @sarahx2802

[brownielocksstuff]

EMMA REALLY IS SELFISH. (RAY TOO BUT HE'S MORE SUBTLE)

At least, when it comes to Norman. Mainly, anyway.

Because darn it these parallels are here again wrecking havoc in my mind and showing, emphasizing what we may have missed before.

I didn't see it before. But this. This is really really selfish.

In this scene Emma was willing to throw away everything. She was risking every single thing they have planned for for months to escape.

It wasn't a heroic moment. It wasn't a moment where the main character was upright and courageous, doing the right thing for the greater good. Because it wasn't the right thing to do. Norman's shipment was the way to go. (Even Ray who loves Norman maybe as much as Emma did had accepted this) Emma's plan of letting him escape in front of mama wasn't.

It was a pure act of selfishness. She didn't want to lose him. And she was losing him. He was going to die and whatshouldshedo?

Emma is a smart girl. She knows what she was doing. She knew the consequences if she succeeded. And even then, she did it anyway.

She had been willing to expose the very device everybody needed to escape. Her leg, that was very much important if she ever hoped to make it out of GF. Ray's six years of planning.

All of it was negligible compared to Norman's life. She was willing to sacrifice it all: Her chances of survival, Ray's six years, Everybody's means for escape.

It was selfish. Stupidly selfish that even Norman snapped at her for what she tried to do.

She didn't succeed here. Norman was shipped out. And she believed he was dead.

I might be bias because I love Norman and everything, but reading the arc after the escape, I think a part of Emma died with Norman.

Even after finding out about Connie's, and those who were shipped out before death, Emma still managed to be herself. She was genuinely happy and hopeful and simply a burst of sunshine and kindness. All of them were going to escape. They would all make it out of there alive.

She was Emma. She was awake to the reality of this harsh world, but she was whole. Complete. She was strong. With him by her side, they would all make it out of GF.

They had lost many but they would move on. Move forward.

But his death hit her hard. Connie's and their other siblings' death couldn't compare. Norman was different. He always had been. It was like she lost a part of her. Maybe she did.

With Norman, the brain, the man with the plans, the stronghold, gone, they needed someone else to be their torch to guide them. While very tactical and independent, Ray was never a leader. He was a supporter. He was the ace. He was an important key but he was never the one to open the door. So, Emma had to step up to fill up Norman's role.

She had to fill Norman's shoes. Had to be strong. Had to be the family's new guide to this unknown world. But... was she still whole?

In GF, it was like she was looking at a future. A future for all of them to live on. To live happily with everyone.

But after his death, she was moving forward for the mere sake of her family. To keep them alive. It wasn't very optimistic anymore. It was selfless. She devoted her life for the sake of her family. For their survival. Maybe even for keeping her last promise to Norman. Not for her future happiness anymore.

Emma had to grow out of naiveity. Learned how to hunt. To gather neccesities. To kill. Because she loved her family. And they needed her.

Even in Goldy Pond, she knew she couldn't die. Her family was waiting for her. She had things to do. Cattle children to liberate. A future that would keep them all safe. A promise to uphold.

Time was good to the family. To Emma. Maybe sewed up wounds of the past. She moved on. With Ray, her family and his memory, she moved forward. But we never really see Emma catch her breath, do we? Never really do anything for herself anymore. Never act like her age and make cute little gestures we all loved back at GF. It was always for survival. And it's kind of understandable given the situation. But even then, we see the other kids being really happy, genuinely happy and living.

Even as a leader, she was entitled to do so. Back at GF, she did but now, it was all about plans and actions for Emma.

I think maybe it's because she never really had time to properly grieve him. Between planning for escape and surviving outside, there's little room to hurt. And with all these little kids looking up to her as a pillar of support, she can't manage to show her pain. It's always bottled up; her pain for losing him.

But that changes.

We see in chapter 119 the sweet relief, the explosion of emotion from our sweet little girl who had to mother all her siblings. A throwback to her old self. (We even see her clothes and shoes change back to her past. Can't put it here coz of 10 pic limit.)

The moment she sees him, something clicks. Something breaks and something goes back to place.

For a moment, she forgets. All her plans. Her family. Survival.

Everything. She drops the very pen that kept them alive for years. And rushes forward. Because suddenly, she was whole again. There he is. The part she was missing. Her ultimate regret. Right in front of her. Breathing, smiling, saying her name as he did in her dreams.

For the first time in so long. Emma finally feels. And she feelsfeelsFEELS.

And for a moment, she was herself. Whole, happy and carefree. He was there. And finally, she was given a second chance.

But then... she sees something else.

Something that binds him.

Something that reminds her of how she lost him in the first place.

There was a familiar tug holding him down again. A weight on his shoulders familiar to her own responsibilities but also so collossal in its difference to hers.

She sees him there, the same gentle person he was before, but he was buried in this obligation and desire to build a new and better world for every cattle children.

He was the same but he was so far away. He was here but he wasn't free. It was shipment day all over again. The entire cattle children's fate on his hands.

And she sees. Sees how probable it is for her to lose him again. Yeah. There's this fact that genocide is evil and there are other ways (pipe dreams) to liberate cattle children but in this scene...

Emma just doesn't want him to go away again.

And she may have to lose him again. For good this time. May it be his life or humanity there's a really big chance that she's losing him in exchange of complete liberty.(I've discussed this on my post about Norman's 0 love for himself).

She's a smart girl. She knows the consequences of her deliberately opposing Norman's plans.

Knows how little their chance of survival in her plans compared to his. But her plans doesn't include mass murder.

Her plans doesn't include him sacrificing himself.

To put it roughly, her plans saves cattle children less and Norman more and demons most haha.

Because, noone would lose anything in Norman's plan. There is only gain for their growing family. And everybody else approves. Ecstatic, even. Only Norman has to bear this weight. And he was willing to do so.

But Emma (and Ray) wasn't. She can't.

So Emma decides. She's selfish again. Wants for her happiness again. She risks everything again. For this pipe dream of hers.

Because she can't lose him for a second time. Can't sacrifice this newfound wholesome.

In chapter 130, she finally admits. She was finally able to be honest and carefree to show her family her feelings about GF escape. How it wasn't a success. Because he wasn't there.

Here, Emma was finally herself again. Her bottled up feelings are all out in the open. We see a different Emma. It's not just for survival anymore.

She sees a future again. Where Norman is there. She hopes not only for lives saved. But for smiles too. She's hopeful again.

That's why she leaves. She bears a little of his weight he carries because his freedom means hers as well.

Norman brought back Emma's sense of self again. It's more than just her family now. Because he's alive. The chain of regret she's carried for so long is cut down. And there's something to look forward to again.

And she's selfish enough not to let him give himself for the sake of cattle children.

She's selfish enough to fight for her desire to keep him. Selfish enough to fight even him to save him from himself.

Because Emma isn't having this. She's not losing him. Never again.

Emma is selfish. If it meant him returning to her with no new series of burdens and decisions to atone for, then she's willing to drag everybody and gauge this pipe dreams of her into reality.

And she repeatedly admits it.

This stubborn, bull-headed girl we love isn't gonna lose him. Not this time. Never again. So look out Norman.

I applaud this girl for giving much love to the boi who needs it as much as he deprives himself of it. (And that Ray loves both Norman and Emma to support her in this.)

[eddie-boii]

Never Let You Go (part 11/14)

Fic info: Both Eddie and Stan live because I do what I want. Multichapter.

Rating: Teen and up (may change). Language.

Pairings: Reddie, Benverly.

Ao3 link: here

Summary: The Losers prepare for a wedding. They’ve had enough of reddie’s antics.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14

*

By the time the Losers got back to the hotel, they were all shivering and damp from the snow, their noses red and cheeks flushed and shoes squelching on the carpet, but they were all still too elated to care and there was plenty of time before the second ceremony to dry off and warm up in front of the grand fire in the lobby.

“I can’t believe you two are married,” said Richie, grinning over at his friends who were snuggled up together in one armchair by the fire.

“Who do you think is gonna be the next out of us to get married?” said Ben.

“Ss-stan and I are already married,” said Bill.

“You are?!” cried Richie. “Why wasn’t I invited to the wedding? How could you?”

“Thirteen-year-old Stan would be ecstatic,” Bev giggled as Stan glared at Richie. He turned the glare to her instead.

“Ww-what?” said Bill.

“I had a little crush on you back then, it’s no big deal,” Stan sighed. “Everyone did.”

“E-everyone?” Bill squawked.

“Yeah.”

“Yep.”

“Definitely.”

“I’m mostly straight but yeah.”

“Oh, come on,” said Bill. “N-not Rr-Richie at least. H-he was too busy crushing on Eddie.”

“What?” Eddie blurted. 

Richie was about ready to deny everything, divert his affections to Eddie’s mom as he always did, but he was happy and warm, still on a bit of a high from the day’s events and surrounded by people who loved him, so for once, he didn’t bother.

“Okay, but there was a brief few weeks before Eds came along,” he shrugged.

“You’re not denying it?” Eddie said, his voice cracking adorably and his eyes wide as he turned to Richie. “You had a crush on me?”

“You were just so darn cute, Eds!” Richie said, leaning across to pinch Eddie’s cheek. He decided not to mention that that ‘crush’ was still ongoing. Eddie batted his hand away as usual but seemed too in shock to protest the nickname.

“So who will be the next to get married?” said Ben in a thinly veiled attempt to divert the attention off an embarrassed Eddie. “Mike?”

“Oh, no way, I’m not really the marrying type,” said Mike. “Not really the relationship type, either, to be honest.”

“That just leaves Richie and Eds,” said Bev.

“And they’ll marry each other, so that’s two at once,” said Stan.

“Will you guys give it a rest?” said Richie. Tired of his friends’ antics, he turned to Eddie. “They’re betting on whether or not we’ll get together.”

“What?” cried Eddie, who still seemed like he had yet to process Richie having a crush on him let alone this.

“Oh for fuck’s sake, who told him?” said Bill.

“Guilty,” said Bev.

“And it’s n-not a question of if,” said Bill, smirking at Richie. “It’s a question of when.”

“Stan and Bev reckoned you’d get together on or before the day of the wedding,” said Mike. He checked his watch. “So we have about nine hours before Bill and I win.”

“I’m sorry I had a little faith that one of them would grow balls,” said Stanley, rolling his eyes.

“I can’t believe you’re fucking betting on us,” said Eddie, face red and eyebrows scrunched up with fury. It was one of Richie’s favourite expressions of Eddie’s. 

“Yeah, and I would’ve won if Bev hadn’t kidnapped you and ruined my plan last night,” said Stan, turning to scowl at Bev. “You’re supposed to be on my side!”

“He’s my emotional support gay!” Bev defended.

“You guys aren’t ss-supposed to meddle!” said Bill. 

“None of you should be fucking meddling,” said Eddie. “My love life is none of your fucking business.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Eddie, it’s been thirty years,” said Stan. “I, for one, have had enough of this. You two have been pining for each other since you were twelve! You like each other, okay? Now can you please get a move on and bone already?”

Richie opened his mouth to retort but no words came. He looked over at Eddie who was staring right back at him, his flustered expression and red face probably mirroring Richie’s. Sure, Stan was right, Richie had liked Eddie since they were twelve. But Eddie liking him back? There was no way. Eddie was always mad at him, always fussing at him about his hygiene and how he was bound to get a bunch of infections, always complaining about his jokes. And sure, Richie loved watching Eddie get all heated and flustered, but that was out of annoyance, not anything else. Surely… 

No. Richie mentally shook his head. Stan saying Eddie liked him didn’t mean anything. The others were just on a romantic high from the wedding, just seeing things that weren’t there. Until Eddie straight up told him himself, Richie was not going to believe anything the others said. Because, honestly, he didn’t think he could handle it if they were wrong. He’d rather spend another thirty years pining then be rejected, then ruin what they had. He liked being Eddie’s friend, he liked poking fun at him and watching him get all red-faced, he liked their back and forth banter, and he liked those soft moments when it was just the two of them, when they could just exist as themselves, comfortable in each other. He didn’t want to risk losing that.

“Give them a break,” said Ben, interrupting Richie’s thoughts. “Twenty-seven of those years weren’t their fault, and they’ve been through a whole bunch of shit. We know that better than anyone. Let them take their time, okay?” He looked over at Richie and Eddie and smiled, forever the supportive friend. “We’re here for you no matter what. Even if you never get together. Right guys?”

He looked over at the other’s and they let out a series of reluctant but affirming groans.

“That being said,” Ben continued, turning back to Richie and Eddie. “Can you two at least promise you’ll have a talk about it?”

Richie and Eddie glanced at each other. 

“I guess,” mumbled Richie after a moment.

“Yeah, whatever,” grunted Eddie.

“Good,” said Ben, smiling. 

“Buddy,” said Mike, “please tell me you and Bev plan to have children, coz you are already the world’s greatest dad.”

Ben’s face flushed instantly but Bev grinned and squeezed his hand.

“All in good time, Michael,” she said which only served to make Ben even more flustered.

By the time the second ceremony was due to start, the real minister had arrived and Stan was back to being a man of honour and walking down the aisle with Mike, which meant Richie was walking with Eddie alone. He tried not to focus on it too much, which was exceedingly difficult considering the conversation the Losers had just had. Did Eddie really like him? Was this just as flustering for Eddie as it was for Richie? Had they really wasted thirty years thinking the other didn’t reciprocate their feelings? It seemed impossible, like something out of Richie’s teenage fantasies, but he couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Richie tried his best not to fidget during that second ceremony, but standing by the aisle while Bev and Ben repeated generic vows in front of a room full of people Richie didn’t care about was almost too much. He occupied himself by scanning the room. He spotted Audra and Patty seated next to each other, and Bev’s aunt sat in the front row beside Ben’s parents with his grandmother beside them. Then there were Ben’s colleagues, the odd work friend of Bev’s who hadn’t abandoned her after her divorce from Tom, and rows of random cousins and distant relatives that probably hadn’t all been together for at least twenty years. Richie tried to amuse himself by making up ludicrous stories for each of them, but eventually, his attention strayed to the other side of the alter, back to Eddie.

He was wearing a neat black suit over a pink shirt that reminded Richie of one of Eddie’s outfits when they were kids. They’d all been fashion icons back then. His hair was neatly combed back as usual and his face was cleanly shaven. And for once, he didn’t look angry or worried or like the world was going to come crashing down on him at any moment. He looked happy as he watched Ben and Bev, his dark eyes soft and shining and a slight smile on his face, his dimples on full display. He was beautiful, and fuck, Richie really needed to get a grip on himself. There was no way - no way - someone as perfect as that could have feelings for someone as much of a mess as Richie.

He zoned back in in time to see Bev and Ben kiss for the second time that day, actually managing properly this time. They walked back down the aisle together, holding hands and waving as everyone stood and cheered them on, then Bev held her bouquet of flowers aloft.

“Ready?” she called.

There was a shriek as all the single ladies in the room fought their way to the aisle for a good spot. Richie just watched them in amusement, but when Bev finally threw the bouquet, it soared over everyone’s heads - she’d always been pretty good at throwing - and right into Richie’s hands before he could even process what was happening.

A disappointed sigh swept over the room from all the ladies who’d missed out, but Richie barely heard them, still staring at the flowers in momentary shock.

“Nice catch, dumbass,” said Eddie, snapping Richie out of his trance.

“Told you you’d be next to get married, Rich,” Stan snorted.

“Yeah right,” Richie scoffed, ignoring his burning face. “You wish.” He tossed the bouquet back into the crowd and there was a scuffle as the women realised what was happening and tried to grab it first. It eventually ended up in the hands of Ben’s grandmother who was quite feisty for a woman in her nineties. 

The reception was the part Richie was really looking forward to; free food and cake and an open bar, and a dance floor for him and his friends to embarrass themselves on.

Music rang through the air as Ben and Bev took to the dancefloor for their first dance as a married couple.

“Close your eyes,

“Realise,

“It’s you and I…”

“Is this fucking New Kids on the Block?” cried Richie as Ben pulled Bev into his arms. “Why am I not fucking surprised?”

“Beep beep, Richie. Shut the fuck up and let them enjoy themselves,” Eddie said, elbowing Richie lightly in the side.

“If loving you is right I can’t go wrong,

“Girl we’ve known each other for so long,

“Chemistry between us has grown strong,

“You are the one and only meaning to this song.”

“It’s sweet,” said Mike, watching the couple dance. Neither were very good at it, stepping on each others feet and giggling, their smiles lighting up the room as they swayed around like they were thirteen years old again and nothing else in the world mattered. “It fits, you know?”

“So fucking cheesy,” said Richie, smiling as he watched two of his best friends dance together. “But yeah, you’re right.”

“You make me feel there's no such thing as too far,

“Forever's just enough time to show you, girl,

“That I'm not acting like I know,

“I'll never let you go.”

Bev and Ben twirled around the dance floor as the crowd of guests cheered them on. The music really wasn’t the kind of romantic melody couples tended to dance to at weddings - more like something that would play at a middle-school dance - but neither of them seemed to care. They danced like there was no one else in the room, gazing at each other fondly, laughing when Ben tripped over his own feet or Bev stepped on his toes, joking that they probably should have gotten dancing lessons. They were so in love and - call him a sappy romantic but- Richie could have watched them dance for hours.

Eventually, though, the song came to an end and a new one started, and Bev and Ben beckoned the other Losers onto the dance floor.

“Come on, we need the best men and men of honour to dance together,” said Bev. “You promised.”

Mike didn’t hesitate to grab Stan and start reenacting Dirty Dancing with him, and Bev pulled Bill onto the dance floor for what she called a ‘father-daughter dance’, despite his protests to the name. 

Richie hesitated, eying Eddie reproachfully. The prospect of dancing with him after Eddie finally knew about his childhood crush, plus what all the Losers had said about them, was almost too much to handle. He thought about what it would be like to dance with Eddie, pressed up close to him, his hands on Eddie’s waist as Eddie’s arms were draped around his neck, barely a breath between them. Just an inch away from-

Nope. Richie couldn’t handle that. He couldn’t trust himself not to do something stupid and embarrassing. So Richie did what Richie did best; made a huge joke out of it.

“Come on, Eduardo!” he said, dragging Eddie onto the dance floor before immediately releasing his hand and lurching into movement. “I believe this is what the kids these days are ‘the Floss’.”

“You’re doing it wrong!” cried Bev, releasing Bill to stand by Richie. “It’s like this. Watch.”

She demonstrated some weird movements and Richie did his worst interpretation of them before dabbing.

“You are such a fucking moron,” said Eddie, but when Richie looked up at him, he was smiling. God, he’d never grow tired of that smile.

“You ever heard of twerking, Eds?” he said.

“No one wants to see that!” Stan cried as Richie went into a squat.

“You do not have alcohol in your system to blame this on,” said Bev. “And that being said, someone get the cameraman!”

Okay, so Richie was stupid and embarrassing anyway, but he figured this was better than the alternative.

*

Previous Next

[chuffyfan87]

Growing Pains. Part 9b

"To look at her she seems all sweetness but I'm guessing she has to be pretty tough to do the job she does."

“She’s had to be pretty tough to get to the position she’s in, as Ward Sister really.”

"I'm just glad that she seems to like me."

“Mum definitely prefers you over Krystal.” He smirked.

"Yeh, Krystal's quite interesting..." Holly giggled.

“Did you see the look on my parents face when she announced over the dinner table she had her nipples pierced?” He laughed softly.

"I'm not sure your dad knew where to put himself and your mum was clearly horrified."

He laughed gently, “I wonder what her parents are like?”

"I dread to think!" Holly laughed as she caressed Peter's cheek. "I've missed this. Just chilling and having a laugh with you."

He moved his head closer to her hand. “So have I.” He admitted.

Holly brushed her lips against Peter's.

He smiled against her lips as he closed his eyes, returning the kiss.

Several moments passed before they parted and settled into each other's arms on the sofa.

“Dad always said when you meet someone important, you know about it.” He said quietly.

"Is that so?" Holly smiled.

He nodded and kissed the top of her head, running his fingers through her hair. “Yes.”

"Do you think you've found that someone?"

He nodded, “I think so.”

Holly hesitated slightly before asking her next question. "Is kids something you've always wanted?"

He nodded, “Yes but, at the same time, the idea of having children terrifies me.” He admitted.

"What terrifies you about it?"

He hesitated, “What if I’m a bad dad?”

"I doubt that. I've seen you with your little brothers. You're great with them."

“I went through a lot when my mum gave birth to my siblings. It was hard.” He said quietly, “What if the person I loved died?”

"Did that nearly happen to your mum?" She asked gently, squeezing his hand.

Peter nodded, “When she had Oli.”

"And she still had Paul?!" Holly asked incredulously.

He nodded. “I was there. When she gave birth to Oli, she was at home...”

"I'm guessing that wasn't the plan..?"

He shook his head and sighed. “The memories are still there sometimes.”

"I'm not surprised." She sighed, pulling Peter into her arms.

He didn’t say anything as he was hugged by her.

"We'll make things work."

“I love you.” He said gently.

Holly gasped. "I've never had someone tell me that before."

“You haven’t?”

"No."

He moved back from her arms to make eye contact with her. “I love you.”

Her eyes sparkled as she smiled broadly at him.

He stroked her cheek before kissing her tenderly.

"I love you too." Holly whispered after they parted.

He grinned and kissed her nose.

"Can I stay here tonight?" She asked coyly.

“I’d like that very much.”

"Its been awful lonely in my house by myself."

“It’s been lonely here without you to cuddle up with.”

"Nothing to warm those cold feet of yours on?" She giggled.

He giggled. “Exactly.”

"Have you eaten this evening?"

“No. Do you fancy going out for dinner?”

"Or I can cook something here?"

“Ok, yeah.”

"Hmm, now I wonder what you've got in..." She mused as she pushed herself up from the sofa and wandered into the kitchen.

“You know me, probably not an awful lot.” He got up and followed her into the kitchen.

"Which is why we normally eat at mine." She teased.

“That’s true.” He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her neck.

"Hmm..."

“We could go shopping?”

"We may need to. I do wonder how you ever survived three years at uni!"

“That makes both of us.” He chuckled.

"Did your mum have to send you food parcels?" Holly teased.

“Sometimes.” He kissed her neck again.

"We're not gunna get very far at this rate..." She mumbled distractedly.

“Am I distracting you?” He asked.

"You always distract me."

“I hadn’t noticed,” He teased gently in her ear before running his tongue over her earlobe. “You distracted me from the very first moment we met.”

"I honestly didn't think you were ever gunna come over." She snuggled back against him.

“I was still so hung up over my ex. But I realised I wasn’t living in the present. I’m so glad I came over to talk to you.”

"She really messed you up didn't she?"

“Yeah, a bit.” He admitted.

She tilted her head round to look into his eyes. "Good job you picked a medical professional, I know just how to mend a broken heart." She smiled.

He smiled, “Yeah you do.”

"I'm more used to working with dogs and cats but I'm sure humans can't be that much more complicated..!" She giggled.

“Hmm, I think cats and dogs are probably better behaved.”

"You'd think but have you ever seen a cat after he got into a fight with another cat who looked at his cat girlfriend in the wrong way?" She chuckled.

“No I haven’t.” He began to laugh as he imagined the cat.

"They're truly psycho!" She joined in his laughter.

“I remember when the twins were younger, they were obsessed with getting a cat.”

"Coz they don't live in a mad enough house as it is..!" She giggled.

“It’s like an asylum!” He giggled alongside her.

"Though your mum did seem rather taken by a couple of kittens we had in being treated when she dropped by..."

“I’m sure she’ll manage to convince my father on allowing her to adopt one.”

"I'm presuming she has a track record for that sort of thing?"

“Oh yes! I’m just glad I don’t live at home anymore. I don’t want to hear how she plans to convince him. It was bad enough as a teen!”

Holly briefly looked confused. "Oh... Oh!" Her eyes widened as she realised what he was referring to.

He laughed. “Some would say its rather cute my parents are still so into each other after all these years but it’s totally gross at the same time!”

"My parents have slept in separate bedrooms for years."

“I don’t think my parents would know what to do if they slept in separate bedrooms.”

"Mum says she hates dad's snoring but I never remember him ever snoring."

“Hmm, maybe he only snores around your mum?”

"Maybe." She shrugged. "They're just weird."

“Shall we go shopping?” He asked.

"I think we're going to need to unless we just go to mine instead?"

“We’ll go to yours.”

"You may want to bring a spare pair of boxers and socks. I kinda took some scissors to the ones you had left at mine..." She admitted sheepishly.

He gasped, “You cut up my boxers?”

"It seemed like a good idea after a bottle of wine."

He sighed, “I really hurt you, didn’t I?”

"It just totally took me by surprise. I thought I'd finally found someone I could trust."

“You can trust me.” He reassured, “It was a moment of madness that has come back and bit me right on the arse.”

"Well, maybe it has." She shrugged.

He sighed softly but didn’t say anything.

They gathered their things and headed over to Holly's house. Peter bringing some spare socks and boxers to replace the ones Holly destroyed.

Using her fully stocked up kitchen Holly was able to rustle up a tasty meal of pasta in a vegetable sauce.

They sat down at the table eating their food and engaging in small talk.

Across town Charlie and Duffy had just arrived home from the hospital and were making something quick to eat.

Charlie yawned. “What a shift!”

"It was." She hesitated before continuing, not wanting to upset her husband after such a long day but aware that the topic needed discussing. "Did you hear back from the rehab facility?"

“Yes I have.” He sighed sadly.

"What did they say?" She asked, taking a small bite of the rice they'd made.

“That they have a place available for Louis.”

"Have you spoken to Louis about it? What does he think?"

“I haven’t had chance to speak to him yet.”

"He seemed really agitated again when I popped by to check on him during my break earlier." She sighed.

He smiled sadly, “It'll be the withdrawal.”

"The school sent his attendance record over." She explained, pointing to one of the letters in the pile that she'd picked up off the doormat as they'd arrived home.

“Worse than we thought?”

"Yes. I'm cross that they didn't tell us that he wasn't attending so many lessons. We sent him to school, once he was there they need to take some responsibility for not keeping him there or at least not telling us that he wasn't." She huffed.

Charlie rubbed his neck, “Did he say anything to you when you went to see him on your break?”

"Not directly..." She frowned.

“What did he do?”

She sighed. "He asked the nurse to 'tell that fucking whore to piss off and leave me alone'."

He sighed. “I’m sorry.”

"Its ok. I've come to expect it."

“The sooner he gets into rehab and is able to deal with whatever he’s got on his mind, the better.”

[tellywoodtrash]

sanjivani 16.10.19 lb

OH SHIT SID HAS A BROKEN SHAADI IN HIS PAST!!?!?!!!! WHUTTTTTTT?!?!??! COZ OF HIS NAAJAAYAZ-NESS??? WHO WAS THE GIRL??? DID HE REALLY LOVE HER???? OMG YEH KYA BOMB PHENKA HUMARE UPARRRRRR?!?!

oh sis, this lipstick is not working for you in this light. it makes you look like a corpse.

asldkjldkjsaldjlaskdjla i am sorry but this is fucking hilarious man hahahahaha, what an idiottttttttt this girl is. 

sid is a much better human being than i am, coz he got concerned and moved to help her, instead of instantly bursting into laughter.

forceful face hardening. jab dil abhi bhi bada hi softtttttttt hai.

haaye, woh bhi kya din tha. aur yeh ek aaj ka din hai. sigh.

"yeh kaanch ki deewar hamesha rahegi humare beech. hamesha."

"yeh kaanch ki deewar, isse main humare beech patthar nahi banne doongi. main jaankar rahoongi ki aapko hua kya hai, dr. sid."

lord. y'all not even a couple yet and you already need hardcore couple's therapy.

"i'm sorry ishani, meri badkismati ke saaye se mujhe tumhe door rakhna hoga."

OH SIDDHU. YOU SILLY BEAN, THERE'S NO BADKISMATI KA "SAAYA" AROUND YOU. YOU ARE THE SUNNNNNNNN, BABY. *hugs him tightest, clinging to him like a baby koala bear on the back of its mom*

but just in case there is, mais suggests you contact the female lead of yehh jadu hai jinn ka coz she seems to have some kinda saaya repelling expertise.

do pal ruka khwabon ka kaaaaaaarwaaaaan, aur phirrrrrrr chal diye, tum kahaan hum kahaaaaaaan.....

it's kinda endearing how jiggy's adopted ishani as bff. honestly, there is no one purer than jignesh in this whole damn show. protecc him 4ever.

oh god, i can't watch this. i can't. it's too gross. and anyway i already saw the scene sayantani put up on insta.

I AM ACTUALLY ANGRY???????????? ANJALI IS SO HOT AND ACCOMPLISHED AND DESERVES BETTER THAN THIS THUMB LOOKING FUCKER, WHO IS ALSO SOME KINDA ACCESSORY TO MURDER (AMONG OTHER UNSAVOURY SHIT.)

also the abrupt cuts between very close moments and the bits where she's pushing him away making snarky smile are confusing me. are the close bits his imagination? ok either way, gross, fwding.

from one gross relationship to another icky one. ouff, give me a break showwwwwwwww. i want to see my baby doctors (any of them, at this poiint; not just sid/ishani.)

"wife ne kyun choda aapko?" lmao, direct to the point.

"kya faraq padta hai? meri beti mere paas hai aur woh mujhse bohut pyaar karti hai."

oh ho. there's that bit of backstory solved.

anjali sympathising with vardhan's daughter.

lmao she's like a dog with a bone.

ofc, work pressure nahi samjh paayi waala excuse. couldn’t possibly be coz you’re clearly a POS insaan huh????

HEY MAN COULD YOU STOP FEELING HER UP LIKE THIS DURING A CONVO???? THAT TOO ABOUT YOUR DIVORCE?!

"har aadmi mere paas bas ek hi cheez ke liye aata hai." anjali isn't here for your bs, vardhan.

and no it's not sex. it's access to her dad. this poor girl has sooooooooo many different facets of daddy issues, it's not even funny anymore.

he needs to stop jerking her around. it's not as romantic as he thinks it is.

also lmao he’s like idk about others, but i don’t want that from you. i don’t even like your dad.

oh anjali, no. don't make this face for thisssssss dude.

I HATE YOU. DIE.

bechaara rahil is stuck between ensuring mamu is dropped home safely and figuring out what the fuck is wrong with sid suddenly.

alllll those extra shaadi waali lightein you ppl plugged in overloaded the circuits. IN A DAMN HOSPITAL. let’s hope there’s no one on life support today.

oh god ab inka "romance" dekhna padega. yaaaaaarrrrrrr. I WANTED HOT ANDHERE MEIN ROMANCE FOR SID ISHANI. NOT THESE TWO!

man you ppl keep framing this relationship as rooted in "izzat" but like........ it doesn't feel very respectful.

oufffff spit it out shashank. do you want to bone her or not????? that's all we need to know here rn. i don't care about the izzat and dosti and falaana dimkaana. IS THIS ROMANTIC LOVE, OR FUCKING NOT? jesusssssssss.

"haan juhi, main tumse pyaar karta hoon."

OK I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND THO. COZ YOU FRAMED IT AS SOME KINDA PURE UNSEXUAL ROMANTIC LOVE AND.... I'M JUST CONFUSED. I MEAN I GET THE CONCEPT OF NON-SEXUAL ROMANTIC LOVE, I'M JUST CONFUSED AT THE WAY THIS SHOW IS CHOOSING TO FRAME IT HERE, IN THE CONTEXT OF THIS PARTICULAR RELATIONSHIP. IS SHASHANK DECLARING HIMSELF TO BE ASEXUAL? (UNLIKELY, CONSIDERING HOW MANY BACHCHE HE HAS RUNNING AROUND THE PLACE AT ANY GIVEN TIME IN THE MANY ITERATIONS OF THIS SHOW, MOST OF WHICH WEREN’T PLANNED.) BUT THAT'S THE ONLY WAY THIS DYNAMIC WORKS. MAKE A DECISION, SHOW. WHAT IS THIS FUCKING RELATIONSHIP????????

and what are we to make of juhi who was all smiley at the dosti and izzat part  of the convo, and keeps getting upset and cagey when he says "pyaar"??!?!?

ohohohohoh how the turntables. time for him to hound her for an answer.

lmao well. there’s your answer.

ok???????? why this random shot of anjali's shadow?

lmao was it really necessary for all the attendees to change outfits too? literally only the bride and groom and their fam needed to.

shashank bana siddhu. while siddhu is off bemoaning his phooti kismat somewhere. iss sab ke liye mujhe wait karwaaya itna iss episode ke liye????? ugh.

THE ONLY TWO I REALLY CARE AND STAN FOR IN THIS SHOW FILLED WITH CONFUSING IDIOTS. PURE, FLAWLESS, SASS BOIS.

lmao rishabhhhhhhhhhh man, where's your mumbai ka best pandit?????/ YOU'RE mumbai's best pandit??????

asha still upset about ishani's breakdown i guess.

awwww, sid's walking jessie down the aisle!

oh shit, while having bad shaadi flashbacks. hang in there baby, hangggg in there.

SHE CALLED HIM HER BROTHERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!! ACTUAL TEARS YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!

lmao @ rishabh getting huffy at that. i can't tell if i love or hate this petty asshole.

"main marrrr rahi hoon!!!!!"

"arre main apne dulhe ko dekhne ke liye marr rahi hoon yaaar."

this is exactly the kinda gallows humour i would keep doing in a sitch like this and i fucking love jessi for being a Dramatic Bitch like me.

here comes the groom. with his bestieeeeeeee.

the rejection phobia is mega real with this one. never thought we'd see anyone more fucked up by it than sonakshi rastogi, but here we are.

but also sid, how do you look at a girl like THIS and then act surprised when ppl tell you that you’re in love with her?????

yeah try to avert your eyes all you want bro, you gonna wife her eventually.

rahil and asha are every sidisha shipper rn; dying on the inside from the.......

OMG THEY'RE THE ACTUAL CUTEST. CAN THE SHOW JUST BE ABOUT THEM????? COZ LIKE.... THAT'S A SHOW I WANNA WATCH RN. PURE SUPPORTIVE MADLY IN LOVE BABIES GETTING THROUGH LIFE, CANCER BE DAMNED.

LOLOLOLOLOL SO WE'RE REALLY GETTING ZERO EXPLANATION TO ME WHY RISHABH'S THE PANDIT THO????????

oh babeeee.

vardhan is me. KISKA ROMANCE DEKHNE KO SHURU KIYA MAINE SHOW, AUR KISKA NAIN-MATAKKA DEKHNA PADH RAHA HAI. BHAKKKKKKKK!!!!!!

sid. hon. stay strong.

ah shit. maybe melt a little. see how she's crying cozza you! come on, man! 

why repeating the “badkismati ka saaya” dialogue from before???? ouff what a hodgepodge fuckingggggg mess this ep was.

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blah blah two of them and their opposing zidds, we all know ishani gonna eventually win anyway.