#and yeah i can read out of order or whatever but also ive been getting addicted to the chrono reads these past few months theyre so good

[themyscirah]

When you're in a Hal Jordan mood but don't want to read Geoff Hal before you read Rebirth and can't read Rebirth before you read Spectre and can't read Spectre before you read Day of Judgement and can't read Day of Judgement because it will spoil the ending to Spectre (1992) and you still have 40 issues left of that but you don't want to read them right now because they don't have Hallllllll (and also you need to slip LWAT in there but you don't want to read that now because you feel like it should be a bigger deal and also are worried about Spectre spoilers) SO basically is there any GL comic out there that I CAN read?

Anyways the real solution to this is just do something older like Emerald Dawn/Emerald Dawn II but also. Now I spent too long posting and the vibes are dead

[valentine-cafe]

I wanna see some of your characters (*any* of your characters honestly, i'm not that picky and theyre all attractive anyway😍) and their first time bottoming for dom!top male reader because ive been going through that tag specifically and i would just love more of that typa content with your characterss

(Ps. Ive been reading your works for a while now and i gotta say im a huge fan)

. ˚◞♡ 𝒕𝒐𝒑𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒇𝒊𝒓𝒔𝒕 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆◞ ₊˚

𖹭. a selection of characters when you top them for the first time /top male!reader

꒰ EEE we’re so happy that you like our content! we wanted to write this with all the characters but who knows how long that would take us sobs - might redo this req in the future with even more! BUT YES MORE TOP MALE READER <3 . . . might have gone a bit wild with rishen 1311 ꒱

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ ALESSIO 781 ꒱ is someone that people tend to forget is a switch. top-leaning, yes, but a switch no less. he’s gotta really trust you in order to let you take control though. but when you do? he makes you work for it. the first time you topped him was a late night in his apartment. both of you kissing and making out on the sofa after playing a few games. the last thing he expected was for you to actually fight him for dominance. it was thrilling - but what was even more thrilling was when you won.

admittedly he was a little nervous. it was so new. seeing the cocky merc now gripping onto your arms and looking at you with those glassy emerald eyes of his. “stop if I tell you to - okay?”

but oh he wouldn’t even dream of telling you to stop. he was squirming and creaming everywhere by the time you fucked the bratiness out of him. which took quite a bit in all honesty.

but when you had him there. pinned to his bed and pounding into him from behind. so that all he could do was cling onto the sheets and let out all sorts of noises of pleasure. his deep voice now pitched. whiney.

“a-amor - d-dios amoorcittooo,” he whines out as you milk another orgasm out of him. all while he whimpers for you to fill him up again. splutters about being a good boy for you. it’s like a complete switch up when you get him under you — and the poor thing cums like a fountain.

he wants you to manhandle him. to be rough. mean. put him in his place and make him feel vulnerable — because he let you. and he wants you to fuck him until he’s on a verge of tears. might as well make the most of it, yeah?

mercenary x reader, antihero x reader, enigma x reader

 

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ RISHIMA 781 ꒱ would be quite the surprise for you as well. one would think that someone of her demeanour is a top dom, right? she’s a switch — she can quickly flip between being the mommy making you hump her high heel or the pillow princess.

listen, she also needs some taking care of. especially with how hard she works. so when you offered to top for the first time she wasn’t too opposed. doesn’t mean she didn’t make you work for it a little.

she can be a brat too — but one who backs off immediately when they know they’ve met their match. needless to say, when you had her bouncing on your dick and digging her black nails down your shoulders and back, she had long since given in.

“f-fuck - fuck anh doll - please - please can’tcantt-” she’d bury her face into your neck to try and hide her noises. you’d have to stop her from rolling her hips down and trying to please you instead. murmuring to her ear about how tonight was about her.

you’d push her into the pillow eventually. letting her rest comfortably while you did the work. being mindful of how overstimulated she can get and making sure to eat her out nice and slowly when it was all over. all so she could gasp into the air about how perfect you were while clinging onto your hair and whimpering.

scientist x reader

 

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ RISHEN 209 ꒱ is another switch but god is this man a brat. he’s awful. riling you up in so many different ways because he wants to see just how far he can push you. because he’s in for it. whatever your kink is — so is his. he’ll go to the extremes and he wants to know just how far you go too.

so imagine his surprise when you pinned him over his examination table. pushing the dress he’d worn for work up and spanking his red-laced ass. how you tied his hands behind his back with his lab coat. pushing into him without a care and rutting his poor, bratty hole until he was creaming all over.

he’s sensitive. beyond sensitive. by the second climax he’d be whining for you. spluttering out apologies and trying to earn your favour. if only to grin at you all tiredly and splutter out a firm no when you asked if he was “really sorry?”

strap his wrists down to that examination table and make him fuck his hips back into you. make him work for it as he cries and whines to cum. because here's a beautiful thing about the scientist - he can’t make himself cum.

“p-please- por favor p-porr favv- hngh b-baby I - I’ll be good pleaseplease hnnhh need t-to cum so bad.”

be rough with him. force him to his knees and fuck his throat. he’ll look at you with pretty maroon eyes and beg even more. all so that you can ram him on your cock again and make him squirt until he’s seeing stars. make him feel helpless. make him feel like all he’s good for is clenching around your dick and cumming all over himself. he’ll love you for it.

mad scientist x reader, moth-mantis-spider monster x reader, yandere x reader, villain x reader

 

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ HAITĀO 99484 ꒱ is a bottom who was more than thrilled to have you top. he did inform you of his scoliosis before hand, reminding you that while he did have quite the stamina as a reaper, to just not overdo it because of the pains in his back.

as such you’d make sure to lay him back nice and comfortably. your first time with him was rather slow and tender. mostly because you were a little afraid of hurting him.

he’s whiney. vocal. making sure that you know just how much he’s enjoying it. the way he keeps pressing desperate little kisses down your throat and stirring his hips up into you tells you that he wants you to feel just as good.

might at one point beg to take a break just so he can suck you off for a bit. he loves the feeling of your hand in his hair and gently guiding him. and his mouth? fuck it was heaven, he definitely knows what’s doing.

would eventually offer to ride you after. which you were a little hesitant about because of his condition — but he assured you that he’d be fine. so the night would drone on with your back against the headboard and arms hooked around you. kissing and whining into each other’s mouths as he bounces at the pace you set for him.

“s-s’good gege - gege,” he whines, creaming all over your abdomen again as he rocks his hips sloppily. “m-more please - please gege, promise I won’t break, please?”

grim reaper x reader

 

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ YIZÉ 9948E ꒱ is another switch who really loves the rough treatment. he really likes the fighting for dominance. however, he might find himself in some conditions where he just wishes to be pampered and taken care of.

your first time topping was the former. he’s a mercenary and a reaper — he had you pinned and taking his dick first - if only for the tables to be turned before he even knew it. slammed into the sheets and forced to stay still as you snatched a pair of handcuffs he always seems to keep in his drawer.

oh he loved the way you took charge. how you degraded him. bit into his neck and shoulders. spanked and clawed and made his eyes roll back as you pounded him into his own sheets.

all so that he was drooling. all so that he could barely whine out your name. and when you’d slow - thinking he had enough?

why he’d grunt at you to keep going. maybe even call you a bit of a coward.

“wh-what? done? can’t fuck me right yeah?” would quickly turn into a series of gasps and sobs and - “s-sorryssooryy b-baby sorry I’m sorry nhhgfuck fuck! please!”

hes’s a loud one. that much you’d garner. until you fucked his mind numb and he was left to aimlessly cling to you. begging you not to stop. . . even if he blacked out. he’s a wild.

 

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ RISHEN 1311 ꒱ is a switch who just yearns to be taken care of. he wants it rough yeah, he’ll fight you for it a bit. but you know what? someone of his stressful work life and always having to be the one in control. . . he really wants to let go for someone.

he wants you to take it from him though. he doesn’t want you to be gentle — he’ll tell you that too. tell you that he wanted you to claw, and bite and take.

so when you yanked him by the hair and pushed him up against his desk - making him stand on his high heels as you leaned him over edge. pressing into his front and shoving your tongue down his throat. . . oh he was in heaven. how you gripped at his jaw and made him keep eye contact with you. ordered him too.

how you shoved his panties off to his thighs and mocked him for the lace. he’d be whining for you before you even put it in.

don’t expect him to be so pliant though. he’s got quite the sharp tongue. maybe he just likes the thought of riling you up too.

“that all you got?” “fuck hurry up.” just to see how he gets to you. but that would all fade the moment you’re fucking up into him. forcing his leaning body to steady itself on those high heels that are stained with the number of times both of you have come.

he’ll rake his nails down your shoulders. try to hold his sounds until you’re yanking him by the hair and encouraging him. make him ride you while you sit on his chair. fuck him until he’s squirming and telling you its too much. because it’s never too much. you can tell each time you try with withdraw and he instead pushes his hips down and forces his ass flush against your dick. squirming.

“f-fuck me - fuckmeeplease dios lo n-necesito tanto.” ( “god please I need it so bad” )

he’ll let you take him back to his apartment to go at it again. fuck him into his sofa, his bed, anywhere you want. he’s all yours. always. and god is he touch-starved enough to keep reminding you of that. even when he’s all covered in your cum.

assassin x reader, spy x reader, admiral x reader

 

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ DENARA 9819 ꒱ is a bottom who really wants to make you feel good and might tire herself out in the process. she’s so used to pressure and having to perform well so during your first time topping her you had to quite literally pin her down and tell her to stop. tell her that you were gonna take care of her. that she needs to relax and just let you fuck her the way she wants.

and oh once you got that out of the way she was all over you. denara is a freak. you got a kink? sure, she’ll try it out. her only request is that you fuck her dumb and drooling.

she was so loud when you took control and drove her into the sheets. admittedly she kept whining about wanting to ride you so eventually you let it happen. pulled her onto your lap and bounced her on your cock. didn’t even give her a smidge of control. watching as her tits bounced and her thighs jiggled as she whined for you.

“b-baby babybabyyy y-you’re sosooo mean angh- mnhhhhgg-”

she wants you to be mean though. wants you to pull at her hair. smack her. grab her. anything you want. all so that she can look at you with her black eyes all teary and her make-up all messy.

will probably beg to suck at your dick so give her that at least. you’ll end up fucking her throat anyway and making her cum untouched. if only to flip her onto her tummy again and fuck her until she’s drooling and whining.

she’ll probably hump at your thigh somewhere through the night when it’s all over. just desperate for more.

sorcerer x reader, healer x reader

[differentpostrebel]

Lost and Found: A Pirate's Promise

The first gif cause Sanji is fine in this Gif, and the second gif adds to the story also lmfaooo

Chapter 28: A Dangerous Gamble

A/N: We are back at it again with another chapter! Don’t worry you guys I’m still creating that masterlist. But when I tell you the next chapters are cooking! Like we getting, all of the action. also Ive been seeing alot of edits on TT with these guys along with a few more I have in store and when I tell you I went FERALLLL!!!! Like someone hold me! Thank you guys so much for the follows, the likes, the comments, the interactions just everything! I cant wait for you guys to read what I have in store! But without further ado, let the adventure begin!

Word Count: 6.2K 

Sanji X Reader, Sanji X Y/N, One Piece X Reader 

Sanji POV.. 

“Yeah, we barely escaped, both the Navy and Doflamingo,” I spoke to Usopp via the transponder snail, my voice tinged with frustration. “Also, have any of you guys seen or even heard from Y/N?” My heart raced with worry.

“Wait, why? What happened?!” Usopp's voice cracked with concern.

“I lost her... and no one knows where she is,” I admitted, my hands tightening around the snail. “Doflamingo has something planned for her, and it pains me that I’m not there with her.”

Usopp’s expression turned grave. “We’ll find her, Sanji. We have to. Don’t lose hope.”

“I’m trying not to,” I said, “but it’s hard when I can’t even get a lead on where she might be. Every moment counts.” 

“What's worse is we’re heading to Zou, so I won’t be able to kick some ass in order to find her,” I said into the transponder snail, taking a drag of my cigarette. My frustration was evident in my voice.

“What? Sanji, you’re not planning on leaving us here?!” Usopp’s voice came through, filled with alarm.

“Hold on a minute,” Franky’s voice interrupted, “What are Luffy and Law up to?”

As I was about to respond, I heard Franky’s question. “Zoro and Kinemon are outside the Colosseum trying to find Luffy so they can bring him up to speed. After that, they’re going to look for Y/N.”

“And Law?” Franky asked.

“Well…” 

Law POV… 

With the Sunny crew heading to Zou and the remaining Straw Hats carrying out their plan, I made my way to the bridge with Giolla. The blade was close to her neck, a constant reminder of the precarious situation we were in. My mind kept drifting to Y/N. I can only hope you are safe and far from Doflamingo’s grasp, I thought.

Footsteps echoed closer, the fog obscuring the figure’s approach. I tightened my grip on my sword, preparing for whatever was to come. As Doflamingo emerged from the mist, his mocking tone cut through the air.

“What’s the point in letting half of the Straw Hats escape?” he taunted. “The rest of them are still in Dressrosa. All I have to do is hold them hostage, and they'll hand me Caesar in exchange for them.”

“Many have underestimated them and paid the price,” I replied defiantly. “Do you really want to add your name to that list?”

“At any rate, my pirate alliance with the Straw Hat crew is coming to its natural conclusion. Do I have to spell it out for you? From the moment I met up with them, I was using them. They'll be destroying the SMILE factory, and as much as I want to revel in killing you, Kaido is going to do that anyway.” I retorted, gripping my blade tighter. “Beside, I want to make you pay for what you did thirteen years ago” I said, my anger evident. 

“Make me pay... for what happened to you thirteen years ago?” “Come on, Law. Holding Giolla hostage isn’t going to change anything.” Doflamingo’s laugh was chilling. 

“You're right. That’s not all you lost. With Caesar gone, you no longer have a hold on the SMILE factory,” I said, my voice dripping with contempt.

Doflamingo’s smirk widened. “My, you are still mad. Grudges aren’t good for your health, you know.”

“This isn’t a grudge,” I retorted, my eyes burning with determination. “I’m seeing his dream through to the end!”

With that, I launched a series of relentless attacks at Doflamingo. Each strike was fueled by the anger and frustration I felt

Sanji POV…

“You better protect my sweet Robin, understand, Usopp!” I said into the transponder snail, the urgency in my voice unmistakable. “And also, keep an eye out for my Y/N!” I added, as I took a drag of my cigarette. I hung up the call, letting out a long sigh. “This anxiety is killing me,” I thought, running my fingers through my hair. “Y/N could be hurt, injured, or worse…”

I shook those thoughts out of my head, trying to stay focused. “Is everything okay, Sanji?” Chopper asked, his voice filled with concern.

“I was just making sure that Robin is safe since she’s with Franky and Usopp right now. I wanted to let them know to keep an eye out for Y/N if they see her,” I explained, my voice tinged with worry.

“Okay, so if Kinemon and Zoro are with Luffy, that means they would need to find Y/N, right?” Chopper said, trying to piece things together.

“Well, knowing mosshead, that’s going to take 50 years, since he’s lousy with directions,” I grumbled. “Damn it! I knew I should have stuck with my gut and stayed.” I grabbed at my hair, a habit I developed when smoking didn’t ease my anxiety anymore.

“I’m awfully worried about Traffy and Y/N, though,” Chopper said, his voice low.

“Traffy is a big boy; he can handle it,” I replied. “Y/N, although I know she can handle anything, knowing what that creep wanted to do to her and what he planned on doing to her makes me sick.” I clenched my hands, the frustration and helplessness boiling within me.

 Momo began recounting a memory he had of Doflamingo, but my mind drifted away to thoughts of someone who wasn't Y/N. “Ahh, why are you happy?!” he exclaimed, breaking through my reverie.

“Don’t worry, being taken hostage isn’t all bad, especially when it’s a beautiful woman doing it,” I said, swooning with a blush on my cheeks.

“You’re obviously thinking about something else; at least pretend to care!” Momo chided.

“That reminds me, Violet said she’d be okay too,” I said, as my mind wandered to our last moments together.

Flashback

“I’ll be fine. I talked to my friend, and I’m certain the government will protect me,” Violet said, as we rode the toy horse together.

“Really?” I asked, still concerned.

“Just trust me,” she said with a reassuring smile.

“Okay, I’d feel better if I could go along with you, but as long as you’re safe, I…” I started to say before Violet reached for my hand.

“You’ve done enough. How can I ever show you my gratitude?” she asked, her eyes filled with sincerity.

I blushed at her words. “Well, you could give me a kiss on the cheek, and then maybe a little kiss on the lips,” I said, my voice tinged with shyness.

With that, I felt the warm impact of Violet’s lips on mine. The kiss was soft but filled with gratitude. I was about to ask for more when Violet suddenly pulled away.

“Oh no, it would seem your ship is under attack by flying fish!” she exclaimed.

“What! What are those?!” I shouted, bewildered.

“No time; you must go!” she urged.

As I skywalked into the sky, leaving Violet behind, I headed back to the Sunny, the urgency of the situation driving me forward.

Flashback end

I sighed deeply, shaking the memory from my mind. “I hope Violet is okay,” I muttered.

Zoro POV… 

Ten minutes before Y/N called…

“Hey!! I’m up here! You guys wanted to talk to me!” Luffy yelled, his voice echoing through the Colosseum.

“Luffy! Quiet down! We don’t want anybody to hear!” I yelled back, trying to keep my frustration in check.

Luffy laughed, clearly unbothered. “Wow, sorry! I was just happy to see you!”

“Ahh, so you met with the green-haired man. At first, I was apprehensive about trusting him, but he seemed quite eager to offer his assistance,” Kinemon said, his gaze scanning the area.

“Where is he now?” I demanded, trying to keep my focus sharp.

“I don’t know. He just, like, passed out…” Luffy said, sounding somewhat unconcerned.

“Passed out?! What the hell is wrong with him?!” I exclaimed, my frustration mounting.

“Hey, by the way, have you seen Y/N yet?” Luffy asked, changing the subject.

“Actually, yeah. She just called,” I said, trying to keep my tone steady.

“Really?!” Luffy’s eyes widened. “What did she say?”

“Something about her being safe and that she’ll call back in a few minutes,” I replied. “I’m worried about her, Luffy. She said she was chased down by three men block after block.”

Luffy’s expression shifted to one of concern. “Three men, huh? That doesn’t sound good. We need to find her as soon as possible.” 

“I agree,” I said, my voice grim. Just then, a call from my transponder snail went through.

“Hello?! Y/N?!” I said urgently.

“Y/N?! Where have you been?!” Luffy’s voice crackled through the line, his grin evident even over the transponder snail.

“Hey, Captain. How’s it going? I was checking on your fight. I wish I was there to kick some ass too!” Y/N said, her laughter coming through, which was oddly comforting.

“Same here, Y/N,” I said, trying to keep my voice calm even though my concern for her was growing.

Y/N began to explain that Doflamingo had been tracking her since she arrived and that three men had been chasing her block after block. My rage spiked with every word.

“Where are you?!” Luffy demanded, his tone sharper than usual. It was one thing to mess with him, but to mess with his crewmate was a whole other story.

“Don’t worry, Luffy. I’m safe. I’m with…” Y/N said, but I couldn’t quite catch the last part. Her voice was muffled, and it sounded like she was with someone, but the connection was poor.

“I have a plan, but I want to ask your permission first,” she continued.

“What’s the plan?” Luffy asked, his focus entirely on the call now. 

“I’m going to have Doflamingo take me to his palace,” Y/N said, calm but with an edge of seriousness that instantly put me on alert.

“Wait... AS IN KIDNAPPED?!” I yelled, my voice immediately rising. “ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR DAMN MIND?!”

“Yes, as in kidnapped,” she replied, unfazed. “I need to draw him away from the Colosseum. Once I’m in the palace, I’ll try to dismantle his operation from the inside. It’ll buy you guys time to get there so we can finish the job.”

“This is insane!” I snapped. “You’re not just walking into a trap—you’re running into it! How many things can go wrong here, Y/N? Do we need to pull out the list? You’re going up against a warlord who is psychotic, you could get thrown in a dungeon, or worse! And we won’t even know where you are!”

There was a pause, then Y/N responded with that annoying calmness. “I know the risks, Zoro. But it’s the only way to distract him long enough for you guys to make your move.”

Luffy, who had been quiet up until now, suddenly chimed in. “Y/N, this is risky, even for you...”

“I know,” she answered, her voice steady. “But I can do this. If I can get him off the streets and into the palace, it’ll give us the upper hand. You just need to trust me.”

“Trust you?” I scoffed, rubbing the back of my neck in frustration. “I trust you, but this plan is reckless even by your standards! Do you even know what you're up against?”

Another pause, and then Y/N let out a small laugh, which irritated me even more. “Zoro, I’ll be fine. Just make sure you guys get to the palace. I’ll be waiting.”

Before I could protest more, Luffy jumped in, cutting me off mid-sentence. “Okay, Y/N. If that’s what you want, we’ll trust you. But you better be careful! We’ll get there as soon as I figure a way out of this Colosseum.”

I clenched my fists, not fully convinced. “This is still a terrible idea... If anything happens to you, I’m coming to drag your reckless ass out of there myself.”

Y/N’s voice lightened, trying to ease the tension. “I know you will, Zoro. But you won’t have to. Just be ready when it’s time.”

The call ended with that, and I stood there, my frustration boiling under the surface.

“Damn it, why does she always have to make things difficult?” I muttered. 

Luffy turned to me, his expression serious. “We gotta trust her. She wouldn’t do this if she didn’t believe it would work.” 

I sighed, still irritated. “I don’t like it. But if Y/N’s already in, we need to make sure we’re ready to follow through. This is going to get messy.”

Law POV… 

I struggled to stay on my feet, each breath feeling heavier than the last. The pain in my knees throbbed with every movement, but the thought of Y/N—captured, helpless—burned in my mind like a raging fire. I couldn’t let her be taken. Not her. Not after everything.

Doflamingo’s laughter grated on my ears, his voice full of mockery. “You look like you’re about to collapse, Law. Just how much longer do you think you can keep this up?”

I glared up at him, blood dripping from my wounds, but my focus was elsewhere—on Y/N. She was out there, trapped in his twisted web, and I was running out of time to save her. My hands tightened around my sword, trembling from the exhaustion.

“You can mock me all you want, Doflamingo,” I growled, my voice low but filled with fury. “But I’m not done yet. I’ll tear you apart before I let you lay another hand on her.”

But my body betrayed me. I could feel my stamina slipping away, the strength in my legs faltering. “Room!” I called out once more, though my powers flickered, weaker now. I felt my ability straining to stay active, but I refused to stop.

Doflamingo smirked, casually flicking away my efforts like they were nothing. “Pathetic,” he said. “But keep struggling, Law. It’s amusing to watch you crawl while I’ve already won.”

His words pierced through the fog of pain in my mind. I knew what he wanted—he wanted to see me suffer, to see me broken before he took Y/N away forever. The thought sent a surge of rage through me. I won’t give him that satisfaction.

I tried again, pushing my body to its limit. My sword swung, aiming for him, but Doflamingo dodged it effortlessly, almost playfully. His string bullets followed, slamming into my legs again, sending me crashing to the ground.

The pain was blinding, but worse than that was the sickening feeling of helplessness creeping in. I bit down hard, forcing myself not to scream, but I could barely move.

Then, his transponder snail rang, cutting through the chaos. I looked up through blurry vision, seeing Doflamingo’s smirk widen as he answered the call.

"Hello, this better be important," he said, his voice dripping with malice. The words that followed made my blood run cold.

"Sir, we got her… we got the girl, young master!" came the voice on the other end.

I froze, my heart pounding so hard it drowned out the sound of everything else. Y/N. No. This can’t be happening. She can’t be in his hands.

Doflamingo's laugh cut through me like a blade. "I knew she couldn’t run forever. Tied up nice and snug, is she?"

“Yeah, she is. She's tied up. Meet us at the Colosseum at the front, so you can take her,” the voice said.

Doflamingo’s eyes glinted with sadistic glee as he hung up. He turned to me, relishing in my helplessness. “You hear that, Law? Looks like your little princess is mine now. And you? You’re going to watch me take her. Let’s head to the Coliseum, I want you to see her all tied up, broken, and realize that you couldn’t save her.”

The weight of those words crushed me. Y/N. My breath hitched, my vision narrowing to a tunnel of fury and desperation. I forced myself to move, despite the pain, despite the exhaustion.

But unfortunately, Doflamingo launched one more attack, his strings cutting through the air with deadly precision, and before I could react, my body gave out and fell to the ground, powerless. As darkness crept in, the last thing I saw was his cruel smile, and the only thought in my mind was that I had failed her. 

Zoro POV…

"Hey, mosshead! Any updates on Y/N?" Sanji's voice crackled through the transponder snail, sounding as impatient as ever.

I rolled my eyes at the snail, which mimicked his curly eyebrow expression. “Now you listen, curly brow…” I started, but then paused. “Actually, yes. She was able to get in contact with us.”

"WHAT? You did?!” Sanji's voice shot up an octave, panic immediately kicking in. “Is she okay? Did Doflamingo do something to her?!”

The transponder snail mimicked Sanji's frantic expression, and I could practically hear the others in the background, freaking out—Chopper, Brook, and Momo wailing in unison.

I sighed, trying to stay calm. “No, she says she’s safe. But…” I hesitated, knowing this was going to cause a scene. “She’s got a reckless plan.”

"RECKLESS PLAN?!" Sanji shouted, his voice nearly causing the snail to vibrate. "Mosshead, what did you say to her? Why didn’t you stop her?!”

“Tch, hey! It’s not my fault, curly brow! She decided this on her own!” I snapped back, gripping the transponder snail like it was his neck.

“Mosshead!” Sanji growled through the snail, his voice dripping with frustration. “What the hell is she thinking?! You didn’t just let her go, did you?! You know how dangerous Doflamingo is!”

I clenched my teeth, trying not to let him get under my skin. “She’s planning to go head-on with Doflamingo,” I said flatly, waiting for the inevitable explosion.

The transponder snail’s eyes widened comically. "SHE'S DOING WHAT?!" Sanji’s voice boomed through the receiver. "Why didn’t you stop her, mosshead?! Do you even understand what Doflamingo is capable of, what he plans on doing to her?!"

I gripped the transponder snail tighter. "You think I didn’t try? She’s as stubborn as hell you idiot! She’s doing this for a reason!"

There was a tense silence, only interrupted by the muffled sounds of Chopper and Brook still panicking in the background. Then Sanji's voice came through again, quieter but no less furious. “If anything happens to her, mosshead… I’ll make you regret not stopping her.”

I closed my eyes, feeling the weight of his words. “I know,” I muttered, my voice low. “But if it comes to that, I’ll be the one to cut down Doflamingo. I won’t let her fall.”

Before Sanji could respond, a deafening crash echoed in the distance. I snapped my eyes open, and the transponder snail mimicked Luffy’s frantic expression as his voice boomed through it. "Doflamingo! And Traffy!" he shouted. "What the hell is going on?! Traffy, why are you fighting Mingo?!"

We barely had time to process what Luffy was saying before we saw it. Doflamingo had his gun drawn, pointing it directly at Law.

Bang! The gunshot rang out, and Law’s body jerked back, blood spraying from the wound. “Damn brat,” Doflamingo growled, taking aim again.

Bang! The second shot tore through the air, hitting Law once more, sending him crashing to the ground. I cursed under my breath. “Not good!”

Just as Doflamingo was about to fire a third time, a sudden, blinding yellow light zipped through the chaos, cutting through the tension in the air.

"Get away from him!" a familiar voice yelled, echoing across the battlefield. The bright light morphed into a swift kick, slamming into Doflamingo’s chest and sending him flying into the nearby buildings. The impact was so powerful that the walls exploded into debris, raining down across the area.

As the dust and debris began to settle, a figure stepped forward, racing toward Law, who lay crumpled on the ground, barely clinging to consciousness. “I’m sorry, guys,” the familiar voice called out, softer now, filled with regret. “I was a bit late.”

The figure knelt beside Law, gently cradling his head, their voice trembling slightly. “I’m sorry, Law,” they repeated. “I couldn’t stop the first bullets... but I’m here now.”

As the last of the dust cleared, the blinding yellow light faded, revealing the face of the person who had saved him. My heart skipped a beat, disbelief and relief flooding through me.

"It’s Y/N!" I shouted, my voice filled with a mix of shock and relief.

Y/N POV… 

As I watched Zoro and Kin'emon from my hidden spot, my heart raced with anxiety. I knew the odds were against me—this plan had a 95% chance of backfiring—but there was still that 5% hope, and I had to cling to it. My eyes flicked to the Colosseum again. “Sabo should be in there by now,” I thought, trying to reassure myself.

I reached for the two small hidden blades strapped to my sides, pulling them out as I remembered the lesson King had given me about these blades. His voice echoed in my mind, calm and mysterious. 

Flashback…

“These blades, although they seem ordinary, can create quite a damaging effect,” he had said as he handed them to me.

I had stared at them skeptically. “So, what do they do?” I had asked, turning them over in my hands.

“They are meant to enhance your skills while helping you channel your abilities,” he explained, leaning back in his chair like it was obvious.

I had been frustrated by his cryptic explanation. “Well, how the hell am I supposed to use this?” I had muttered, annoyed that he was speaking in riddles rather than giving me straight answers.

He had simply smiled. “Once you channel all that energy, you will soon learn of their true purpose.”

End of flashback…

Now, standing in the shadows of the Colosseum, I gripped the blades tighter, trying to channel the energy within me, just as he had instructed. I could feel the familiar warmth building in my hands as a yellow light began to glow faintly around the blades.

Suddenly, a massive impact shook the ground, sending debris flying everywhere. I instinctively covered my face with my arms, the sharp dust and rocks pelting my skin. “Doflamingo must have arrived,” I thought, heart pounding in anticipation.

But when the dust cleared, my breath caught in my throat. Law. He was lying on the ground, bloodied and unmoving.

“Law?!” I whispered, shock and confusion hitting me like a tidal wave. "What the hell happened to the plan with Caesar? Did it fall through?"

The urgency of the situation took over as I heard two gunshots ring out, echoing through the air. Doflamingo had just shot Law again. My heart pounded as I saw him preparing to strike once more. Without thinking, I lifted my left leg, the yellow light around me intensifying, and dashed toward them.

"Get away from him!" I shouted, channeling all my strength into a kick aimed directly at Doflamingo’s chest. The impact sent him flying back, crashing into nearby buildings. Debris exploded across the area, shrouding everything in dust. As the light around me began to fade, I heard Zoro’s voice, full of disbelief.

"What the hell just happened?" he muttered.

Breathing heavily, I looked down at Law’s battered form. His lips trembled as he muttered broken words: "Cora... Y/N…" My heart clenched as I knelt beside him, cradling his head in my hands. My voice cracked as I whispered, "I'm sorry, Law. I wasn’t here in time to stop the first bullets... but I’m here now." The ache in my chest deepened, seeing him like this.

"Tell us what’s going on, please!" Sanji’s voice rang out through the transponder snail. I barely registered it as Zoro approached me, concern etched on his face.

“Y/N...” Zoro said, his tone more gentle than usual.

"What?! What’s going on?!" Sanji demanded again, his voice filled with panic as it crackled through the transponder snail.

Murmurs began to fill the air around us. I could hear the marine soldiers in the distance.

"She struck a warlord!" one of them gasped in disbelief.

"That’s Princess Y/N, she’s with the Strawhats!" another soldier pointed out, his voice trembling with both shock and admiration.

"No way... she actually landed a clean hit!" whispered another.

Kin’emon approached, bowing slightly in my direction. "It would appear that Lady Y/N has now arrived," he said, his tone filled with admiration and respect.

Before I could respond, Sanji’s frantic voice came through the snail once more. "Let me talk to her! Please!"

Kin’emon moved to hand me the transponder snail, but before I could take it, the sharp crack of a gunshot filled the air. My body tensed.

Doflamingo emerged from the dust, walking toward us slowly, a twisted smirk on his face. "My, my, that kick nearly took me out. I’ve got to hand it to you, princess," he sneered, his voice dripping with mockery. "I’m liking this side of you."

I stood up, my heart burning with anger. "Doflamingo…" I muttered, my grip tightening around my blades.

"Y/N, wait!" Zoro called out, his voice filled with warning.

"Y/N!" Law rasped, barely able to speak, his voice weak but desperate. “Tell me what’s going on?!” Luffy’s voice echoed from the Colosseum

I stared down Doflamingo, my mind racing. The tension was thick in the air, and everything seemed to freeze for a moment. Doflamingo’s smirk deepened as he approached, his voice laced with cruel amusement. "Princess, I was told you were captured, bound like a helpless little bird. It seems my subordinates were mistaken."

I grinned defiantly, reaching into the waistband of my skirt and pulling out a small momento I’d taken from the thugs. "Maybe you should hire better help next time," I said, tossing it at him. It struck his chest, and he glanced down, his amusement flickering into irritation.

"So, you’ve got some fight in you after all," he said, his tone mockingly impressed. "I thought you’d be running by now."

I held my ground, my fingers tightening around the blades, the faint yellow light beginning to glow again. "I hear you’ve been looking for me," I said, my voice steady. "Well, here I am."

Before he could respond, Luffy’s shout rang out from behind the bars. "Hey, Mingo! You’re gonna pay for what you did to Traffy!"

Doflamingo turned slightly, glancing back at Luffy with a smirk. "Law? That little brat used to work for me," he said, his voice dripping with malice. "Didn’t he tell you? Some ally you’ve got there."

My breath caught at his words, my gaze flickering to Law, who lay battered and barely conscious. But I couldn’t let this rattle me, not now.

Doflamingo’s attention snapped back to me, his grin widening. "Now, where were we? Ah yes... I was just about to capture you."

He moved forward, his fingers twitching as he prepared his strings. But I wasn’t about to let him think he had control. "Doffy," I said, smirking, "your subordinates—at least the one I knocked out—called you that. Funny, I thought you enjoyed the game of cat and mouse. What’s the fun in capturing me so easily?"

Doflamingo chuckled, clearly entertained by my defiance. "A game, is it? Alright, Princess, let’s play." His fingers twitched, strings flickering in the air. "But remember, I always win."

I clenched my blades tighter, the yellow light flaring to life. "We’ll see about that, Doflamingo. Let’s find out who’s really in control here." 

I gritted my teeth, the glow from my blades flaring even brighter. "Kinemon, Zoro, get Traffy out of here!" I barked, my eyes locked on Doflamingo. I lifted my left leg, ready to dash toward him, determined to land a strike.

But just as my blade was about to meet its mark, I felt an immense force slam into my arm, redirecting my attack into the sky. "What the—?" I gasped, trying to react quickly, but the same weight crashed into me again, this time with enough force to send me flying into the Colosseum wall. The impact knocked the breath from my lungs, and blood dripped from the corner of my mouth as I slid down to the ground, stunned by the sudden assault.

"Y/N!" I heard Zoro shout, his voice full of alarm as he turned his attention toward me. The weight of everyone's gaze shifted to where I lay, struggling to get back on my feet, the air thick with tension. "Y/N!" Luffys voice cut through the chaos, a note of alarm piercing through as he turned his gaze toward me. For a brief, tense moment, it felt like time itself had slowed, all eyes converging on my injured form. "Are you alright?" Luffy’s voice, filled with concern, crackled through.

I struggled to rise, my body shaking with pain. "Yeah, Luffy, I’m okay," I managed to reply, though my voice was weak. "But what the hell was that technique?"

As I fought to regain my balance, I saw Zoro and Kinemon charging toward Doflamingo. "Pirate Hunter Zoro and Foxfire Kinemon," Doflamingo drawled, his tone mocking. "I also noticed that Momonosuke is unguarded aboard your ship." Kinemon’s face tightened at Doflamingo's words. "Don’t listen to that bastard! We would never let him take Momo," Zoro shouted, his anger palpable.

But before Zoro could strike, the blind man from before intervened, delivering a powerful blow that pinned him down. "Zoro!" I cried out, my heart sinking as the sight of him struggling to break free filled me with dread.

Doflamingo smirked, his eyes gleaming with malevolent amusement as he shifted his focus to Kinemon. With a swift, unexpected move, Doflamingo struck Kinemon, sending him crashing into the ground. "Kinemon!" I cried out, my voice trembling with urgency and frustration.

I struggled to push myself upright, clutching my sides where pain radiated. My grip on the blade tightened, the yellow light and electrical charge flaring brightly. "Hey, Doflamingo!" I called out, lifting my left leg. "Forget about them. This is our game."

Doflamingo’s attention snapped back to me, a cruel smirk spreading across his face. "Ah, my defiant princess," he drawled. "Your spirit is truly something to behold. Once I capture you, you’ll discover just how much fun I can have with someone as spirited as you."

"That’s what you think!" I retorted, gathering all my strength. I dashed toward him, using the momentum to leap into the air and aim a tremor kick at Doflamingo. But as I extended my right leg, it suddenly stopped in mid-air, restrained by an invisible force.

I gritted my teeth, trying to break free from the unseen grip. "What’s going on?" I shouted, my frustration mounting. Doflamingo’s laughter rang out as he floated up to my level, his presence imposing and taunting.

As I tried to attack with my right hand, still clutching the blade, another invisible force wrapped around my wrist, pulling it back. I struggled against the restraints, my heart pounding in my chest.

Doflamingo floated closer, his face mere inches from mine. His gaze was cold and calculating as he gently grasped my chin, forcing me to look directly at him. "So close, my princess. The power of the String-String Fruit is quite remarkable, wouldn’t you agree?" he taunted, his voice dripping with mockery. "It allows me to control and manipulate anything I desire." Doflamingo’s smirk widened as he stared into my eyes, his malevolent gaze unwavering. Slowly, he moved his hands from my chin, trailing down to my neck. His touch was cold and commanding, the invisible strings still binding me tightly.

"Ah, such fire," he taunted, his fingers tightening around my throat just enough to remind me of his power. "You really are a fascinating specimen, Princess. The way you fight against the inevitable, it’s almost endearing."

He leaned in closer, his breath warm and disturbing against my skin. "You see, my strings can control everything from the smallest details to the most grandiose displays. And right now, you're tangled in my little game. You're not just my captive; you're my plaything."

I glared at him, the struggle evident in my eyes. "I’m not done yet," I said, my voice resolute despite the pain. "I won’t let you win." 

Summoning the last of my strength, I quickly maneuvered my free hand, still clutching the blade. With a swift, decisive motion, I cut through the strong bindings constricting my right hand. The strings fell away, freeing my arm. Without hesitation, I moved to sever the bindings on my right leg, slicing through them with precision. As I fell from the sky, my body propelled downward by gravity, I saw Zoro emerging from the debris, his face filled with determination.

“I got you!” Zoro shouted as he dashed forward, managing to pull me from the perilous height. He caught me in mid-air, his grip firm and reassuring as he guided me safely to the ground.“Thank you, Zoro,” I said, still feeling the tremors of pain as I tried to stand.

Kinemon hurried over, his expression a mix of concern and disbelief. “What’s a navy admiral doing with Doflamingo?” he asked.

My eyes widened in shock. “You mean to tell me that blind man is a navy admiral?” I asked, the revelation hitting me hard.

“Kinemon, is Y/N okay?” Sanji’s voice crackled through the transponder snail, filled with worry.

“Hey Sanji,” I said, trying to stay calm despite the sharp pain. “I’m okay. Sorry for worrying you.”

“Y/N…” Sanji’s voice choked up, filled with worry, but before he could continue, a sharp, searing pain tore through my left shoulder. I cried out, dropping to my knees as the pain overwhelmed me.

“DAMN IT!” I shouted, gritting my teeth, fighting against the agony. I looked down and saw blood trickling from a fresh wound—a bullet had struck me.

Doflamingo’s mocking voice echoed through the chaos. “Ah, look at you, princess. Already on your knees for me,” he sneered, his voice dripping with cruel amusement.

My eyes shifted to where Doflamingo was now holding Law,standing behind the Navy Vice Admiral, a smug grin on his face . “Don’t you dare!” Kinemon shouted, his voice filled with fear and frustration.

I managed to stand, determination burning in my eyes. "If he wants to fight dirty, then fine," I muttered, sheathing my blades. My body still ached, and the sting in my left arm reminded me of the situation’s urgency. Turning towards Zoro, I locked eyes with him. "There’s been a slight change of plans," I said quietly, still clutching my injured arm.

Zoro's brows furrowed. "What change of plans?" His hand was already on his sword, sensing something wasn’t right.

"I’m going to let Doflamingo capture me here." I leaned in closer so only he could hear. “I didn’t expect the Navy Vice Admiral to be involved, which complicates things. But the original plan stays. Capturing me here will still keep the plan in motion."

"Like hell it will!" Zoro snapped, his voice low but brimming with frustration. His grip on his sword tightened as if ready to strike. "You're not doing this alone."

Before he could make a move, I had already stepped forward, forcing myself into the spotlight. "Trust me, Zoro. We don’t have a choice."

“Doflamingo!” I shouted, trying to keep my voice steady despite the pain. “I thought this was our game of cat and mouse. Are you scared already?”

Doflamingo’s grin widened, his eyes glinting with cruel amusement. “Princess, such bravado. I must admit, I enjoy this side of you. It makes the victory all the more satisfying.”

As Doflamingo held Law like a puppet, I clenched my left hand, activating the power of my ring. I leaped into the air, raising my right leg, ready to deliver a powerful tremor kick. But just as I was about to strike, the navy admiral used his power to halt my attack mid-air. I was slammed back to the ground, crashing heavily into the dirt.

“Y/N!” Zoro yelled, his voice full of desperation. “Hold on! I’m coming!”

I struggled to rise. The air around me grew heavy, and invisible strings began to wrap around my body, lifting me off the ground. Doflamingo’s laughter echoed around us, cold and mocking.

“Wake up, Sir Law! Lady Y/N, are you alright?” Kinemon shouted, his voice filled with panic.

“Are you kidding me!” Zoro shouted in frustration, his voice crackling with anger and fear.

Doflamingo’s voice carried a sinister edge as he spoke to Fujitora. “Let’s take this conversation back to the palace. There’s much to discuss, and I’m eager to see how this little game ends.”

As Doflamingo’s strings tightened around me, I came face to face with him once more. His grip was unyielding, the pressure making it hard to breathe. I met his gaze, and despite the pain, a smirk formed on my lips. “Phase 1 of the plan is complete,” I thought to myself as the world around me started to darken.

As I began to slip in and out of consciousness, the smirk on my face remained, a silent declaration of our progress.

Zoro, visibly frustrated, prepared to make another move. But before he could act, the navy forces readied their weapons, their presence creating an impenetrable barrier. Doflamingo’s laughter filled the air, mocking and cold. “Look at that,” he said, his voice dripping with malice. “It seems your friends are in quite the predicament, princess.”

I fought against the strings, trying to regain some control, but it was futile. Doflamingo stepped closer, his face twisted into a sinister grin. “I’m going to savor this. I plan to enjoy every moment of it.”

As I was lifted away, the last thing I heard was Kinemon’s determined voice cutting through the chaos. “Both Sir Law and Lady Y/N have been seized.” The words lingered in my mind as consciousness began to slip away, leaving me with a mix of defiance and resignation.

[zelenbug]

i did the height thing again but for rayman 2, specifically the pc version (minus the ending uglette and polokus, got them from dreamcast bc the pc ending map didnt load but this shouldnt affect anything). and i didnt leave anyone out this time ! (EDIT: actually i forgot one guy but theres a separate comparison at the end of hte post)

full image uncropped (21.8 mb, 36506x3438) and also halved again because its A Lot (7.6 mb, 18253x1719)

and condensed. a bunch of guys have been cut from here for being WAY TOO TALL!!!

also full image (5 mb?, 11015x1560)

notes below read more again

-

this time i didnt let them be at their original y positions (relative to rayman with the same y coordinates) for convenience

otherwise i got the images the same way as with the rayman 3 height thing more or less, but was more lenient with y rotation for the ending cutscene and didnt relocate them to the same y coordinates every time bc rayman 2 maps are weird. i also let the upscales/downscales for some things still be a thing, both axel and foutch are at 2x scale (thats why theres a bonus tiny foutch) and jano during the boss fight is 5x

i didnt get everything from the dreamcast version because ive never played it but i did get specifically this image for bias reasons

these are all the same exact height unsurprisingly. all from dreamcast btw lmao i dont have an explanation for globu's hands

the babies are in hte order of their actual object instances so enjoy the fact that theres 8 of them (the lower poly one doesnt count thats a diff object technically) but oktette is not the eighth one. also enjoy these random tiny fish

the caterpillar thingy (that they used to represent black lums in rayman kart for some reason) is confusing so i made its height the approximate height of its segments here

now the important question? Whos taller ???!!!! ok yeah its reflux no competition

you see why i didnt include any of the much taller guys in the rayman 3 height chart ! i had way too much trouble with the r2 ones already!!!

and it turns out my sheets are cross compatible bc rayman ended up the same height on both of them minus ONE pixel. the r2 one is taller but its such a negligible difference im not even counting it

using this knowledge you can just directly copy paste and compare whatever you want!!! heres a bunch of comparisons idk its kinda interesting

i have to go stand next to a tiny angry robot to showcase how much taller i am

2024.02.29 edit i forgot about this guy sorry

would be around here

[finn-shitposts]

obSESSED W>ITH YOUR TAGS I HAVE to put order in my thoughts but i love the magic concept of it's same energy but just faster with the lace thing ? since i was little i was like SLAY fucking slay. ALSO ELVA????? ELVA??????????? anyway as an adult i like ertagon a lot he's just a fucking fifteen yo or whatever. I ADORE NAsuada. and Glaedr. and everything. anyhow ive been going down this hole because i wanna read the new book that came out last year so YEAH i guess. Also murtagh baby boy very zuko if i must be cookie-cutting him

REAL SO REAL nasuada fucking RULES!! elva being an enigma to everyone except angela is downright hilarious to me ,, they just have zero clue what to make of her. And glaedr and oromis!! I wanted nothing more as a kid than to learn from them (i used to try recreate that scene where eragon has to meditate on a tree stump and try and sense all the creatures around him. Id just sit in a field for 20 minutes and try and hear everything and identify all the sounds i could pick out.)

Also deeply loved seeing glimpses of the urgals culture in later books its so interesting to me !! And the dwarven clans and gods!!! Im just a sucker for that good good worldbuilding 😌

Murtagh my favourite emo *slaps his head* this boy can fit so much trauma angst :D and damn youre right he really is zuko...

Ive had The Fork the Witch and the Worm for years and the Guide to Alagaesia too, but ive not read Murtagh yet 😔 ive loaned my bookset to my friend in an effort to get them to read it after 4 years of begging xD so i have to wait till they finish so i can reread the whole thing before the new book unfortunately T.T (its been almost a year. To be fair i also borrow books from them for a year at a time sksjsj were both terrible at remembering to read them)

[softbutchthatlovesyou]

Anyway (im high but whatever im saying this) I have seen black women unironically speak about how androphobia against black men is very much a real thing, because black men are forced to be black before they're allowed to be men.

Their androphobia isnt any less systemantic when the best encouragement they get to be allowed to be men is if they are willing to help racist white men to punch down on women. It just also doesn't help to like let em get away with misogyny. Or misogynoir just because they also face racism.

They are only Men to like, a shit ton of people when they get violent so why wouldn't they make boys think they're doing it right when they internalize that racist shit.

We try again and again to talk about how black boys are told they'll never be a real man if they can't fight for themsleves and how quickly that morphs into toxic masculinity against them, and it gets written off by white women who want every man to be their personal attacker ao they can claim they chose to be like this.

They are quickly degraded down to boy or something less than a person when they fight these systems.

I have watched respected black men call out systems and become completely rejected for not being a Man before he is Black or Kind. I've seen people say to them they're "not enough of a man to get that women don't need to be working here" (real quote btw)

Men can uphold the systems that benifit them yeah, but they have to be seen as men by the ones who most wants every one of us to stay down. Sometimes they do it all correct and they're slammed anyway, told off for an appearance that will never change to a racist.

A lot of you talk about gender like it's the center of all issues when racism has been shown to be time and time again also a pretty main fucking source.

If you ever actually read about intersectionality on somewhere that isn't tumblr or a twitter thread you'd know what the fuck it means, but you all personally wrote some random fucking definition that paints you as a perpetual victim in order to save yourself the trouble of thinking in anything but black and white. pun not intended

.

anyway this isnt fleshed out but here ive been dying to get this point off my chest even half done but if someone (whos not picking a fight) wants elaboration i can answer more specific questions probably

[skyland2703]

HEADCANON YEET

Not only does Amelia only eat the bread’s crust, she eats French Fries sideways, says the most random shit and wakes Javi in the middle of the night to say the most concerning and/or disturbing things known to man, eats oyster shells but not the insides, sleep screams instead of snores, chirps like an Ankylosaurus, and always aims for the ankles for the pun.

Javi and Amelia are not allowed to babysit baby zords due to an incident with Baby Pacha involving a screwdriver, a wig, a jar of peanutbutter, a dictionary, and a very rude bird.

Javi once called his Stego Spike Zord a tsundere. Let’s say it did not end well.

If the destruction of the DinoHenge statues caused the souls of the dinosaurs to be released and said souls end up using the rangers as vessels, then Javi gets an instinct to “mark his territory” the Stegosaurus way, which is to use your tail spikes to scratch up tree bark, so this leads to Javi occasionally being found VERY INTENSELY rubbing his lower back against a wall or tree or whatever surface in an attempt to please said instinct. Walls are fine. Trees hurt. Amelia however, ends up being very finicky when it comes to her stomach and chest, as those are the most vulnerable parts of an Ankylosaurus’ body, so any physical with those areas will not lead to good things.

Amelia nearly had a panic attack when she found out pizza scissors were a thing a

HEADCANONS!!!!! I LOVE!!!!!!!!!!

OKAY SO YES I AGREE, Amelia just eats anything and everything. Like she wouldn't go for the middle of the bread, "no, that's way too soft." while eating the crusts. Same for Pizza. Javi is the most vanilla foodie in the universe, so while Amelia's chomping on chilli potatoes he's just sitting next to her with a carton of milk. It does make sense, because of course, they're complementary to each other :333 but yeah. Javi IS horrified every time he sees her eat anything out of the ordinary.

It ALL makes sense when they find out she's rafkonian btw.

THEIR FIRST DATE NIGHT AMELIA ATE OYESTER SHELLS AND JAVI ALMOST FAINTED because boy cannot even stomach NORMAL oyesters.

Javi also sleeps like a dead man and nothing can wake him up at night, so he always makes sure to fall asleep BEFORE Amelia, rather than after, just so he can have a peaceful sleep. Despite her sleep screaming.

....I’m curious to know what the very rude bird did, and if the screwdriver ended inside someone's ear or not.

Stego Spike can tolerate being called anything from Javi. just not a tsundere. Ankylo zord also calls him a tsundere. It's become a running joke and Stego spike HATES Javi for it.

Stego brained Javi... hmm.... does he scratch against Amelia too?? :D Also Amelia would definitely kiss all the scars on his back which leads to more shenanigans, so despite the bleeding Javi actually loves it (yes ive been reading twisted games DON'T @ ME). AND YES no mater what anyone says, Amelia is going to let Javi touch her most sensitive things. Belly rubs and soft kisses are order of the day!!!!!!!!!!!!

...Javi brought home the pizza scissors. he's a chef. Amelia started using it to cut everything. according to her, it looks very anime fox like.

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 7/18/2023

idk man i just work here

listening

not another rockstar, maisie peters. spotify

this is a little poppier than i generally prefer-- the first knee-jerk comparison i can make for the vocals is taylor swift, esp in the first verse? luckily for everyone, i was white-knuckling it down the katy freeway (26 lanes. never again) and did not have the extra concentration necessary to skip it on whatever autogenerated dance playlist spotify spat out for me. as a fellow woman with a Type, i must tip my hat to ms peters.

Hmm, funny I could pick 'em in a line up, line up Pretty certain I could do it with my eyes shut, eyes shut A little self-obsessive and I sign up, sign up Where's the pen? Where's the line?

@pasta-pardner has made a gorgeously lush electronic/indie pop cowboy playlist. my very favorite song (so far, still have it on loop) is Horsie by Twilight Circus Dub Sound System. it sounds like the opening theme to Samurai Champloo. it ripples and grooves. it lives somewhere between rock and reggae. the whole album is incredible music to hang out to.

-

reading

retractionwatch (my beloved) linked out to datacolada.org in a recent article and my ears perked up. data colada gets REAL deep into the investigative reporting of specific papers, including some fascinating excel sleuthing. they use CalcChain!!! i thought i was the only one who used CalcChain!!!

CalcChain tells Excel in which order to carry out the calculations in the spreadsheet. It tells Excel something like "First solve the formula in cell A1, then the one in A2, then B1, etc." CalcChain is short for 'calculation chain'.

one of my worst traits as a person is that i looooooooove an academic trainwreck. i love watching academia eat itself. i love watching people get caught for sloppy shit like "excel file sorted REAL weird, pointing to tampering with individual data points"

-

watching

new jennings motor sport!!! the oil change is. hough. impressively disgusting. oil does some funky shit when it's been sitting for ??? decades

-

playing

ive been playing genshi/n impact like it's my job. having a lot of thoughts about crunch, and content, and player expectations vs shareholder expectations and Line Go Up and if AAA free-to-play video games are at all ethical to play for anyone ever, but hey! look at this snarky catgirl!

also lol. lmao. this is a game for children. we are all aware of the restrictions and limitations placed upon games for children in the chinese and american markets so yeah the answer is going to be yes, every time

-

making

lately i have been going to my best friend's house after work (what an unimaginable sentence a month ago) and hanging out and watching whatever toddler shows are on tv while we shoot the shit and i knit. there's another half-repeat on the baby blanket for the baby who has just turned four months old, but it's in the car and the night is dark and full of mosquitoes.

i literally cannot do any life shit, even most doctor's appointments, until i have a real physical stable address so all i am really doing is knitting and playing genshi/n and opening and closing my email like the fridge. i have one security deposit back from the old mass apt plus one more paycheck (but, crucially, not the nearly $2k from the roach apt and we are rapidly approaching lawsuit time) so the cat and i are a little bit more stable/able to put down a security deposit on something else the minute it comes along. this would not have been possible without the incredible generosity of readers like you during that very bad first week here. thank you. i want to do some sort of thank you...stream? liveblog? series of posts about something? but i'm not sure what yet. stay tuned. tell me your thoughts. what would you like to see?

[mrs-monaghan]

Complementing this AMAZING anon https://www.tumblr.com/mrs-monaghan/716415440587456512/ive-read-a-few-asks-on-your-blog-and-other-blogs?source=share

Let's not forget that Jimin HIMSELF said that Jungkook behaves VERY differently behind the cameras - as we all would!!! Ofc he's not going to be all up on Jimin in front of everybody because 1: obviously they can't come out, there's a lot at stake, they cannot consider only themselves but the group as a whole, and it's literally illegal in MS. there's a lot of political shit involved too. 2: he knows he's gonna lose bc Jimin can outflirt him in a SECOND, and 3: like anon said, he's an introvert who probably prefers to keep their affections to themselves/private (even though he also slips up sometimes), so he gets really flustered. Even if Jk was dating someone else (even if it was a girl, like you all so DESPERATELY want it to be because GOD forbid he's anything else but straight), I still think he wouldn't be big on PDA. I think he has a very sweet, quiet personality and I don't think he'd be all over his partner in front of the cameras.

Back to the topic, Jimin and Jungkook have always been sus, it's literally why, to this day, they sometimes still get awkward, flirty and shy around each other (let's not forget how Jimin was all blushy and sighing when Jungkook said he'd be leaving the gym to come to join Jm's live on Jimin's birthday). Its why they're always gravitating towards each other, its why they can't keep their hands off each other, even if it's just their silly, never ending hand holding/shaking. It's even more obvious how differently they act towards other members! Their interactions have a much deeper meaning, and they know people catch onto that, so they're cautious. And they're being even more cautious now and I understand it completely. Just because you don't see them hanging out in public does not mean they don't hang out in private.

One: they don't need to prove anything to you. Two: do you even know how long-term relationships work? Sure, it's fun to go out with your bf/gf, but the years go by and, at some point you're just happy to be with each other, chilling at home, ordering food and just being around each other, comfortable and free to do whatever you want. Sometimes you can't wait to get home after a night out to be more comfortable with each other! Now just imagine Jikook, who can't be a normal couple since they are worldwide famous, going out in public, as they did a few times in the past and got caught. They wouldn't even be able to behave comfortably around each other or do anything without being spotted/photographed, and it's especially risky now. How is that fun for them? If they have to act stiffly around each other and can't have fun?

Do you get it now? Privacy is their best friend now more than ever. Jk doesn't need privacy with Taehyung because there's nothing but friendship there.

Oh, by the way, need I remind the taekookers of the hotel room jikook shared on their Tokyo trip? With the ser through bathroom? Yeah... Try and debunk that.

But its okay, taekookers, you just keep on eating your little crumbs 😘💕 (I love taekook as FRIENDS btw)

Love it

[transmandrake]

Feel like talking about art... I worry a lot that I've passed some kind of 'peak' in my art, not per se skillwise but productivity wise.

'I made a 65 page full colour full shading comic chapter and had it printed! Oh my god, I could never do that now', I think. But thankfully in this age I've seen this exact thing happen to so many artists slightly older than me... intense productivity in school, sudden drop in early 20's, figure shit out in late 20's. It makes sense, art was basically the only thing keeping me together for many of those productive years, and I was miserable.

And now, yeah, I'm back in a high stress environment, but this time I'm managing my own progress and am doing things I want to do on some level, that aren't art. Is it any wonder people go on massive hiatuses when theres no longer One Thing they want to do?

And well also. The classic. It is bonkers the amount of people I grew up admiring who crashed and burned in college and then get diagnosed with, well usually several things but especially ADHD. I'd like to think I'm "learning from other's """pitfalls"""" by nipping that revelation in the bud early (healthcare system tho... pls gimme anything... an appointment, maybe...) but I've been ruminating a long time on art advice and life advice and a lot of the time it's not possible to 'skip' on doing the 'wrong' thing.

So much art advice is like 'man i wish i learned anatomy or x thing when I was younger, so much time wasted' and yes it seems true in hindsight, learning anatomy is pivotal to my current art... but I think I had to *get* to a point art and well growing up wise where that was even something I could fully comprehend. Theres lots of things where, yeah, I'm sure sitting 12 year old me down and getting them excited about Bones and Muscles wasn't *impossible*, but there was like 100 mini lessons that have no names I had to learn first. It's like, a skill tree in a video game. You have to learn fireball I and II before great fireball IV or whatever. It's easy to say man, why didn't I learn Hard Thing sooner, I would have been so much better by now, when in order to be able for Hard Thing you had to learn all the smaller easier things it leads to. Going straight for the big guns isn't impossible, but you'll end up having to go backwards at some point. In fact I feel like that's what's happening to me now!

I'm like, why is my art shit conpared to a few years ago, why am I half-assing everything, and you know what I spent 5 years only doing full colour full shading stuff because that was The Inevitable Artistic Conclusion and doing Less would be Wasting My Time! And I think that was the right choice actually. *Because* it made me learn that thought process wasn't true.

Also ummm FFAK by kosmicdream who I am sheepishly not tagging basically rewrote my brain? A 6000+ and not even half finished comic drawn with maximum speed and not sweating the details? And its great? And at no point did I think the story was worse off for not being polished to 100% 'completion'? Preposterous!

Well, not really. Loads of comics are like that. I knew I didn't want to be like them. But hm, its a conscious choice now rather than a feeling of shame at not completing things. The reassurance that, it's okay to not finish things, and it's okay to do less in order to finish things. Balance. FFAK just really punched that lesson into my skull rather than the light jabs of comics I'd loved before. I can count the comics I read as a kid that actually *finished* on like, two hands max. I reevaluated, what do I want to be, perfect incompletion or finished imperfection. And chose both and neither because I'm a vile little contrarian.

Am I going to finish my comic? Finished doesn't exist, so no. Does that mean my tedious perfection is justified as long as the unfinished work is what I envisioned? Also no, because I am not the same person I was when I stopped lifting the pen and my idea of perfection is also always just out of reach. Also it's. A story. I want to tell it. Not look at it.

Like, just... do what you want. What you want will change, you can't put a box around it. But also develop discipline, because that box helps. It's always breaking and expanding and shrinking but the box has to be there. You have to try. But you won't succeed. And that's okay, because that's not the goal. It's a dance, not a house.

You might want to build a place to dance easier but you've gotta dance. And you suck at dancing but you love it. And if you don't love ot anymore, go work on the house until you want to again, and you'll think, why am I building this goddamn house instead of dancing, and you'll keep forgetting that the house exists to dance in. Then someday you come back off the scaffolding and realise, woah, holy shit, dancing here is going to be so much better.

And you think, why didn't I make the house like this in the first place? Well, because you only started building the house when you didn't want to dance, imagine if you made the house perfect, and then stopped liking dancing? Well you'd be me, you'd knock that house down, and you'd rebuild it all shit, because you didn't need the house to dance, you needed the process of building it. You can make that perfect house all the time, but you can only make a shit house once. No matter how you try, you're gonna figure out why the house is shit, and make it better.

And you'll say, why didn't I make this first before! I'm learning so much! And you'll remember why, it's because everyone said 'man, don't make a house like I made it. Look at my new house, its so much better, do that! I wasted so much time on the shit house!' But they didnt. They learned. You made their perfect house with no understanding of why it was perfect. You had to break it, to rebuild it, to retrace the steps, to learn.

[wifegideonnav]

well i… finished act 5 act 2. gonna have to rewatch cascade a bunch of times and probably read the act summary on the wiki but i have officially reached the end of the act

still enjoying it a lot but it’s getting harder and harder to read. summing up a rant i gave my friend, i’m not super in love with the sense of predestined futility - or more accurately, i don’t feel that the narrative has properly addressed that yet and justified why i should be reading about these characters who were like 100x doomed from the start.

there are so many characters and so much happening that nothing is lingered upon, which is nice pacing-wise but not so nice emotional-impact-wise. i also think the “everybody dies a bajillion times and it’s fine until all of a sudden it’s not” thing works against it in a sense, especially when the narrative doesn’t stop to mourn anyone who’s actually dead, bc by the time you realize hey wait maybe like. vriska or dad or feferi/nepeta/equius etc are dead for real it’s been like 200+ pages and you’re like well ok. what do i do here exactly.

and i know that that’s an intentional choice hussie made for how he wanted to craft his narrative - im wishing for things that he deliberately chose not to give. im not trying to say that these choices are flaws in his writing, just that as an audience member i tend to prefer the tlt method of dealing with death, where one main character dies and then the entire next book is about another ripping herself apart because of it.

im not giving up by any means, or even saying that this is what’s dominating my reading experience. like i said im still enjoying myself and appreciate most of the creative decisions that hussie is making. it can just feel very draining i suppose, watching these characters i’ve come to care about - almost all of whom are literal children - fighting so hard so futilely, and so far, imo the narrative hasn’t paid that off. however, with that out of the way, here are (some of, bc this shit was long as hell) my thoughts on the act, more or less in order:

i have literally no interest in johnkat. probably partially bc my friend is so into davekat that ive been conditioned to just wait for that to happen but also bc they have no chemistry. sorry to any johnkat shippers out there but idc it’s boring

i have slightly more but still negligible interest in john/vriska. probably bc i… don’t really care about john. sorry to any john stans out there but idc he’s boring

karkat and terezi sharing a keyboard to argue my beloved

rose my beloved. but also. sweetie :/

vriska my beloved. but also. SWEETIE :/

kanaya my beloved. you’re doing great no notes

oh yeah dave and terezi manipulated the stock market. still don’t 100% understand that but whatever good for them

yeah ok the dream bubbles. christ. like ok i GET it but they’re still annoying

i love jade’s dynamic with karkat she really goes from “teehee im just a silly little girl haha” to “im going to eviscerate this motherfucker”

bec prototyping himself was genuinely such a good reveal

is it just me or is john's power like. way lamer than the other kids' lmao. like it's still cool, def better than nothing, but come on

not too much to say abt the exiles but i love them

also with all the fucking timeline bullshit that's going on i literally can't wait to reach the end and reread with the uhsc mod that lets you follow a specific person's timeline. i canNOT keep track of what's happening when for who

it is literally so funny that vriska has been the cause of jade's narcolepsy this entire time. like wow girl you really took the opportunity to be a massive dick to her huh

LET'S BE SANTA

frogs. ok sure. why not.

fuck doc scratch all my homies hate doc scratch. i will say though. he is a fantastic character.

holy shit eridan and gamzee snapping and killing like everyone. that was buckwild what the fuck. not gonna lie idc that equius is dead, and nepeta, feferi, and tavros were never my faves. but got damn it sucks that they're dead. (ostensibly. still not one thousand percent convinced)

sad karkat :(

murderous kanaya :D

WV "DRIVING" AHHHH

oh god the ancestors. sorry but i simply do not care about that shit. like i know that they're actually relevant but. :/

also i don't like the trope of chains of events being echoed across generations. like damn get your own plot. also it ties into that determinism and futility that i'm grappling with

i will say though. mindfang mentally thanking redglare for taking her arm because then her battle against his honorable tyranny because it made it "a fair fight"? hot. i'm brave enough to say it.

aradia is cool as fuck. i wish we got more of her/her personality

aradia's ancestor is also cool as fuck. sucks that literally nothing she did to resist her fate worked or mattered

the scratch stuff is genuinely interesting narratively/in terms of a plot device. again it still sucks that the beta kids aren't actually going to get to win the game themselves. like i assume they'll be talking to/guiding the alpha kids but like. god it's so unfairrr i bet there'll be angst about this

rose going grimdark is so fun. also LMAO john trying to chat with her in that flash game portion

TEREZI god i love her. sucks that she killed vriska tho bc i love her and also i ship them. oh well murder is not necessarily a roadblock to them getting together. troll romance sure is weird. i have hope in my heart.

vriska isn't dead forever bc no she isnt <3

the betty crocker shit. is funny. and also stupid as hell.

SAD KARKAT :((

ok i guess the stuff about karkat's ancestor and the history of the troll race is kinda interesting. whatever.

everyone's in love/hate with gamzee all of a sudden?? literally why. troll romance sure is FUCKING confusing

that was a pretty anticlimactic climax to the gamzee situation, gotta say

cascade was confusing as fuck i don't have thoughts on it yet

so yeah that's it! if you're still reading, why? let me know what your thoughts on act 5 act 2 were when you read it, or your thoughts on my thoughts lol. just pls no spoilers for anything past cascade!!

[csmelody]

AAAAAAH sorry if this has been said before, or was meant to be an obvious thing implied by your work,

But i just keep thinking about the lore etc youve built up, and one of the things i end up wondering about is the healing magic (and now, how it interacts with magic resistance etc etc)

Bc like

Its Established that magical energy was left over in nats wound and severely impeding the healing process, but that it could be activated and set right (bc it was a magical injury? And was in the process of being healed?)

( Is essence/magic always neutral and potentially restorative like it is in the other place for spirits, and just applied to induce harm, or are there inherently different energies? [Electricity runs our hearts and keeps them beating, but can also stop them, or start them?])(Is essence inherently restorative?)

Its Established that going to the other place ptolomys gate style results in a) injury/aging/negative effects and slow recovery and b) an abundance of magical energy within the body upon return

Also established that kitty has resistant powers (reg and sword.), some sort of kinship with the amulet which has inherently similar powers, and shows resistance to meshing fully with bartimaeus (did she see less of an effect coming back from the other place than ptolomy due to this and not just bc of duration spent?)

So if nat went to the Other Place would he potentially have ptolomy level effects, negative ones but also in the amount hes suffused with energy? (Ptolomy "brighter" than kitty)

And more importantly given its a "magical injury" and energy is present, is it possible the energy is potentially stopping or slowing the healing/recuperation/relearning?

Is it possible that bart could do the same thing he did with the side injury, or similar, in order to fix/speed up recovery post dimension hopping were it a non magic resistant person in question? (Whether it can be done from the outside, or must be done from the inside)

Did kitty recover on her own more effectively because (along w just keeping more energy out longer) she wasnt infused the same way in the first place, and her sort of 'restorative temple', (as one has in a human body apparently,) was never accessed, and therefore never disrupted? (As we saw bart (who is made of essence, same as other place) couldn't really properly get into it?)

Does the body react badly to the other place because of a disruption to like, whatever is going on in there that makes it good for a djinni to be in there? Is it a similar disruption to what caused nats wound to get janked up?

If i understand/remember correctly the presence of the magic in nats wound allowed for barts healing, but its presence prevented/slowed natural healing. As time went on for both kitty and ptolomy after their adventures, they regained some of what was was lost, but kitty much faster and more fully. /but,/ she also lost the glow (energy/essence?) faster i think? (Resistance chasing it out? Continued exposure to the amulet?)

Ptolomy didn't seem to Really lose the glow and the healing was there but very slow paced, kind of like nats wound. (Magic not leaving, natural healing reduced)

All this leading to

If bart /could/ help w the effects of ptolomys gate field trips by activating the energies or something similar, (just not with someone resistant to magic like kitty who is our only other example of whats up w all that,) and bart /realized/ that,

Is it just oh fuck i could have helped ptolomy. I could have /saved/ ptolomy. Any advantage could have been the one that would have led to a different outcome?

Added onto whatever circumstances (honestly probably nats life being saved and him nearly not recovering. Again.) led to getting the knowledge that, yeah, you probably could have if youd known to, and known how (even if its impossible to know if it would have changed anything)

.

.

Uh. Sorry for rambling and ranting. All this to say thank you for the good fic, im clearly invested. Ive read it thrice.

It is very late though so i apologize for any eccentricities, faux pas, and/or inclarities in this here message. I probably should have slept on sending this but for some reason im worried ill forget what im thinking about now if i dont.

Oh also Please feel free to ignore this or respond without posting the ask itself for whatever reason

(eg not to clog dash, somehow ive gotten too close to a spoiler plot point idk, you just dont feel like it, its just incomprehensible, the government will find and dissappear one or both of us if they see this due to nefarious machinations we're yet unaware of... all good reasons.)

In general, No offense meant, and none will be taken if likewise. :)

First off, spoilers up to chapter 30 of The Lost Artefact. Probably not that far, but just to be safe. And I'm sorry it took me weeks, but I was just so focused on writing and not losing momentum. I hope you end up seeing this. Plus, I'm trying my best to say what needs to be said without spoiling the rest of the story. It's harder than you'd think. Okay, so, these are questions I want you to be wondering about, so I guess I did my job. 😂 And I'm not offended, I'm deeply flattered! I love chatting all things Bartimaeus.

The short answers for TLA are that magic is neutral, intention is the key, and ageing isn't a wound or a condition, so it's not 'curable' by magic. Here are some things I took into account:

Nathaniel wasn’t healing properly because the residual magic kept burning through the stitches and the meds.

Bartimaeus feels instantly reinvigorated when he’s summoned into Nathaniel’s body in PG, as does Nathaniel. So magic can’t be inherently bad to humans. In fact, it’s a symbiotic relationship when done right, and we get the sense that this is how it’s supposed to be with humans and spirits, actually, just like Ptolemy’s conversations with Bart foreshadowed.

Essence can burn through human flesh and skin (when the body is put through ‘unnatural’ circumstances, like eating a bunch of humans), as exemplified by Nouda. So magic isn’t inherently all good either. However, we don’t get a sense that there’s a timeframe exactly for this. Faquarl seemed to be doing well and he was in his host (Hopkins) for quite some time.

I took the Ptolemy/Kitty conundrum differently. Essentially, I based it on the fact that Kitty is a healthier individual, stayed in the OP for a shorter interval, and didn’t die soon after. Ageing, like I said, isn’t a wound or an illness, so it doesn’t function the same. At least that’s what I figured.

As for how Kitty and Bart literally didn’t mix, I figured that Kitty’s resilience should extend to magic in general. She resists the bad, but also the good. But it’s not like she totally cancels out Bart, and there are different types of resilience.

That's all I'm going to say for now. Otherwise, I think I'll just be giving myself away, hahaha. I should really get started on a Bart master list so these are more organised...

Anyway, feel free to drop a question anytime. (Or a prediction! Always fun.)

[nahalism]

did you ever need to take sth like antidepressants for anxiety or panick attacks? I recall you speakin about having dealth with them in the past & been wonderin if you ever tried medicating urself for it / would consider it if your nerves were getting too much 4 u at some point down the line or did you develop ur own way around those little&big pits of hell

xX

heyyyyy <3 (this will b long but this question deserves a thorough answer so hope thats ok)

ive been strongly encouraged to take various medications over the years, particularly for anxiety/mood stabilisation, and twoish weeks ago i ended up in hospital cause literally i lost my mind, and i felt so out of it that thats the first time i ever considered not just wanting, but needing medication in order to function. however, i didnt, cause i dont like making decisions in the moment (desperation leads to desperate decisions) and because before that experience and even during it, ive never felt convinced that medication was the solution to the problems i was facing. 1) due to the physical, mental and emotional side effects. & 2) because im not convinced the people prescribing the meds even know what is 'wrong' with me.— a lot of that has to do with the nhs being a mess, (its quicker to get meds than wait thru the referral time to get diagnosed & into therapy) but also, theres a lot of comorbidity in the diagnosis ive been given, so there are multiple things to treat & in their eye's medication gives a faster result than unpacking all of that individually. the recommendation was to put me on a cocktail of drugs that can fuck up my liver kidneys and endocrine system to 'see if it will work' .. :/.

the only thing that has ever worked for me is sitting with myself and my emotions, acknowledging them, doing things at my pace in my time, and structuring my life in a way that is tailored for me and my success rather than being successful in the world or in a socially accepted way. that means having a morning routine that caters to my mental emotional and physical health, (mindful practices, yoga, gardening, sound work etcetc), and finding ways to continue that throughout the day (working creatively and limiting my exposure to people or situations that are not for me/overstimulate me).

that being said, this routine (which is still being refined and altered) works pretty well for me, but comes with sacrifices and isnt fool proof. symptoms of my mental illness still persist & without being medicated people are less lenient when helping someone they feel isnt 'helping themselves', im also still working on how to be as sociable as id like to be, and often my spirals are triggered by the very system i have in place to help me. i often face feeling like a let down, like im lazy, like im a weirdo/recluse, like im incapable of being a normal person etc etc. for example, a lot of the friends i graduated with have experienced crazy growth in their careers and have a sense of social and financial security that i dont have because they can function year round, whereas i have months at a time where i dont feel myself and have to disappear in order to keep sanity and peace in my being, lol. that, and the fact that it takes me a lot of base maintenance and effort to function as a normal person makes me feel like shit if i let it, so i constantly have to remind myself on top of the work i do daily, that whilst there are things others have/experience, that i dont, the inverse is also true, and theres beauty to me being me in my way. and .. yeah 🤷🏽‍♀️. that part is hard. but its also worth it to me and has taught me a lot

all that being said, do your own research and decide what feels right and what is best for YOU. speak to your doctors, therapists, and friends who may be medicated, or look on forums online for perspectives from both sides. [*if anyone reading this has a helpful opinion 2 offer pls comment]. the feeling of helplessness when your in the throws of whatever mental illness you suffer from can be debilitating and if taking a pill everyday or when you need it can fix that, no ones opinion should sway you from doing what you need to do to function. some of my friends who are medicated swear by medication!! (particularly when it comes to adhd meds) cause not being able to process thoughts and function is horrible and ruins lives needlessly.

so yh.. i hope this helps. as long as you do whats best for you, i have no doubt you will find your way through this and that it will be worth it. above all, know that the power of your will, your mind, and your person, is what makes you special, and so even if it takes more for you to show up than it does others, that's absolutely fine. take your time with it, and know what nothing is wasted, because you have no idea the good that can come from working out the details. most of the advice i have to offer comes from making it thru an existential crisis or bout of depression. <3

blessings 2 u love

[iwashere666]

Idk why pero hanggang ngayon hindi parin ako dinadalaw ng antok.

Kahapon pa ako gising. Actually may pasok na nga ako ngayon pero puno parin ako ng gising.

Siguro dahil narin sa dami ng nasa utak ko? Di kaya?

So sorry in advance. Random thoughts lang tong mga susunod. In no particular order.

-----------------------

Im a lost cause. Ive given up on life already. Theres nothing more that I can offer you right now not even in the future. Dont get me wrong, I appreciate everything you've done. I just can accept it. I cant accept that you're wasting your time on me.

I thought highly of you. Maybe too high that I cannot picture you being with me..

I cant end this. Sorry. Im just waiting for the time that you realize everything and forget about me. Im not gonna change. I dont I can anymore. Ive tried, all my life to get better but look at where I am right now, back to zero. And still spiraling down to nothingness.

Please. Realize it asap. Im a lost cause. Theres no helping. Im telling you I tried, and have been trying. People are also tired of my bullshit.

Ayon. So yeah. Also siguro magupload ako sa soundcloud mga snippets? Ano ba tawag don. Mga lines ng songs na naiisip ko out of the blue. Baka kasi mawala ako bigla tas sa phone ko lng nakasave lahat eh edi wala nako legacy sa earth na naiwan.

Ano pa ba. Ayon. Fck I wanna do everything. And that makes me do nothing but sleep or stay awake like right now and just float away with time and whatever the fuck this situation Im in right now.

Fck I thought I was. I was doing good these past few days. Ive managed to talk to people and go out and be normal again. But fck.

Im here again. Wanting to end all these sht.

Ugh I wanna watch films while also playing games and listening to albums and reading. All at once. But I can't. And its frustrating as hell. I wanna explode.

[sankttealeaf]

Hey there! I hope you're having a good day 🥰 Can we do 1, 22, 23, 27 and 28 from the ask prompt list, if you're feeling up to it 😊❤

HI!!! i hope you're having a good day as well!! i've answered 1 & 28 over here!

writing asks can be found here!

22. do you ever worry about public reaction to what you’re writing? how do you get past that?

sometimes? especially with durgetash considering gortash is not the nicest egg in the basket and i do really enjoy writing things from his pov. i absolutely hate him as a person but he intrigues me so 😔

at the end of it all i just tell myself that it's not real. there are more pressing issues happening in the world than to get annoy about who's writing what!

if people don't like what i write or the way i characterise someone - the back button is there, so is the block button ykno??

i did have a dream once where someone got angry at me for my durgetash fic that they sent me an email saying they were upset i was writing about two horrible characters. that was kind of funny.

but yeah. i try not to care too much about it. easier said than done, and so far everyone has been lovely about my writing and i'm forever grateful for that <3 but if anyone did have a problem with what i write i hope they just block me and move on than try and make a big deal out if it.

23. pick three keywords that describe your writing

chaotic (im a chaotic writer)

commas (i use a lot of commas. too many sometimes.)

suffering (i like to suffer :D )

27. your favorite part of the writing process

recently it's been planning? which is completely unlike me. normally im a big "sit down and churn out 10k words and then lose focus" but ive been properly planning out let sleeping dogs lie (and its all planned out)

and also writing whatever i want, not worrying about doing it in order! i've got full scenes for future chapters written up, i have lines for previous chapters that's never made the cut! just writing whatever comes to mind! it's fun to see where it takes me and what changes when it comes to the final draft

also editing. i go back and read any dialogue in character voices (or the best attempt i can do) and it really helps work out if it sounds / flows right (fun fact: rue has tav 4's voice and thats like. easily mimicable for me / closest to my voice i think)

(please free jason isaacs from my brain!!)

[sl33pyperson]

threats on the table: solas (ofc, hes the name of the game), venatori (gotten stronger in power after inquisition apparently? ive frantically been reading wiki pages), red lyrium templars (meredith wants to Wipe Out tevinter.)

this rant got kinda long and im just spitballing so

super scared we’re gonna get the venatori/tevinter vs templars plot treated really similar to the general mage n templar war, “wow inquisitor you chose One Option and now its over congrats! dont think about the consequences or ripple effect of any of these actions it doesnt matter! you just have a different skin on your soldiers!“

solas taking the red templars and using them to cause general chaos? yeah? hes used the venatori for his own means before?? i might just be misremembering what solas actually wants, but tldr its tearing down the veil to bring back old days where spirits n magic was everywhere? red templars seem P Bad for that plan then

WAIT THE BOOKS ARE ACTUALLY IMPORTANT IM JUST. GONNA COPY PASTE ALOT OF THINGS FROM THE WIKI 

“The Carta assassin says that Solas wants the lyrium idol, retrieved from Meredith's statue thanks to a potion” “The Orlesian bard claims that he saw Solas retrieve the idol from an auction house“ “Their stories indicate that Solas has already started the ritual he intends to use to restore the elven empire, that it involves and has already started to affect the Fade, and that it requires the lyrium idol.“ theres another book where a venatori danarius has stolen the idol from something but the wiki says thats probably Before The Dread Wolf Take You

solas is literally using red lyrium to break down the veil!!!!! having meredith and her soliders everywhere would be so useful as conductors for whatever the fuck he wants to do???

screaming crying but its also the taint!!!! if theres another fucking archdemon im going to die!!!! but the wardens literally wanted to prematurely bring along the rest of the “blights“ by killing the sleeping archdemons so aoudhssdafiuhdf

bring along the world you destroyed previously by destroying the current world!!! fucking THANKS solas!!!!!

i got so fucking. distracted by solas i forgot the main bit of why i started this.

Who You Choose As Divine Is Really Important For How Many Templars There Are

also considering that REALLY good post going around about “why tf did divine justinia even make the inquistion in the first place“ “so she could destroy the mages and have the seekers as better templars but everywhere“

LELIANA: destroys circles as a whole, templars would still be around as a form of “security“ and shitty cop sbc i really doubt the chantries everywhere would give them up. theres still demons and possessions and ppl dont let go of the old ways. CONSIDER!!!! you can literally kill leliana in dao. she could be a spirit. shes also in the absolution mission scenes (still think she would do that even as divine but whatever) i really fucking doubt they would choose leliana as biowares canon, bc they hate mages, u can kill her, circles in nevarra are still mentioned in absolution.

CASS: reinvents a new form of circle and templar order. templars still around. she is STILL working for the inquisition tho, so like, i really doubt shes the canon one purely bc of absolution. if they didnt show cass giving those orders i would be less hard about this.

VIVIENNE: hardens up both circles and templars in the old way. oh my god. so many templars everywhere i bet, i forgot specifics its been a really long time but like. it seems like most likely at this point. vivienne is around no matter what, she doesnt care for the inquisition, shes the most “Eh, doesnt matter that much to other character choices“ one around

tldr oh my god if the red templars are actually able to go and infect other templars, and if vivienne is divine, they’re gonna have a huge fucking army and that makes them scary!!! i also hope who is divine changes the number or the tactics of the red templar army in game. but its bioware so prob not alas