#and women knowing that anger personally
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Marvel women, written by men: 🧍♀️I can’t have babies 👶🏻😫😢 I’m a monster 😢😢 yes this is the deepest my backstory can get btw 😉😨 isn’t it harrowing 😱
Marvel women, written by women: I will subject an entire town to my will if it means the chance to see you again. I will drink my grief, knowing I am damned and that I cannot protect you, and will still sing out my heart to crowds of thousands in the hopes they will keep you safe when I’m gone. I crave power so intensely that it has overpowered any sense of loyalty to anyone, and I will betray again and again and again, but I will still be wounded when you betray me because it was you. It was you.
#agatha all along#wandavision#age of ultron#agathario#lorna wu#agatha harkness#black widow#it’s the difference between men not realizing that women are actually very very angry#and women knowing that anger personally
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does anyone have ideas on getting involved in irl feminist activism in your community i literally think it's the only way i'm going to like. survive. and i'm completely serious about that.
#male violence + manipulation + harassment + sexist treatment from other women has shaped my entire adult life. every aspect of it.#isn't that fucked????#like i am literally not a happy person primarily because patriarchy exists#and i don't know what to do with all that anger. i feel like i have to put it somewhere
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i am glad drake is being called out and i’m glad kendrick is doing exactly that but i can’t help but notice that men are only quick to label other men they hate as predators and not their very own friends.
its a valid way to feel but when trying to analyze peoples actions possible political results i find its better off to try to lock away ones own feelings about the entire system. its unfair.
like ive seen many people upset along the lines of "so kendricks just coming out with these serious allegations just cuz theyre beefing. men only care about womens violence to dunk on other men" and while thats a valid way to feel about the culture, about the general, the majority, about men, cuz we literally see this happen around us, etc etc we literally cant apply it to individuals baselessly.
i have 0 idea what the circumstances were and what kendrick was thinking through this whole thing, WHAT I DO KNOW is that its literally historic someone with this kind of platform is so ruthlessly coming after someone else from the industry with very clearly stated accusations. its so ugly but in Hollywood, you have actors and directors revealed as sex offenders or in lawsuits of sexual violence OR EVEN COMPLETELY OFF THE GRID unacceptable behavior and no one breathes out a word on it. its tradition directors take advantage of women to give them roles. tradtion to write naked scenes for women they want naked. but everyones tail is caught in everyones mouth, so people whose brands are wholesome or "progressive" stay silent to stay employed. its all very hushed.
ive never seen a man this popular and widely respected openly call another man a misogynist. like i said before, its not that Kendrick Lamar is some Feminist Scholar King, its that the action, the angle is surprisingly pro-woman. in times feminist sentiment gets so much backlash and is so unpopular with general audiences i was pleasantly surprised by the way he spoke of women. thats it.
#mypost#kendrick lamar#drake#k.#like i HAVE to approach peoples behaviors with as much neutral grace as i can because...#i find when one let their anger about ''men'' ''patriarchy'' ''misogyny'' seep into judging any individiual man they sound like a terf...#cuz im so mad and so hurt and need everyone to ACTUALLY Be feminist scholars and ACT in womens sake#that i lose grasp of the common person. that we all grow up In A Society. with sexist coding. that it takrs so long to unlearn#thats if you are even somehow driven to do so by circumstances partially out of your control#so yeah. sadly if i judge men on having read at least one 1 single feminist book and understood it.....and i killed those who didnt?#id have to kill all men i know#so yeah! lets take our small dub. kendrick lamar killed that predator lol
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like i believe there can be a middle way, a golden mean, between tolerating "men are violent misogynists bc women aren't nice enough to them 🥺" and tolerating those users. i believe it's possible to just not give way to either
#tolerating transphobes and passing on their stuff. like i am personally not fine with the meaning hidden between the lines and i'd prefer we#made our own organic man-hating posts instead of terf-made ones#and i feel like. it's hard i know like it's bad that the general userbase is stupid and advocates for men's rights. and often women and#lgbt+ people who think of themselves and call themselves progressive and call themselves feminists#often act. out of misogyny. this is sad. i know! but i'm worried about being pushed towards the other side#NOT worried about too much feminism fucking obviously but let's not leave trans people behind. you know?? does anyone at all get why i'm#frustrated sometimes.. i'm a woman and i want to understand and respect other women's anger and concerns and attitudes and wishes#and know where it comes from#and let it have space because it needs space#but not so much that it's at the expense of trans women........
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how do i do it though. how do i let go of the bitterness and the hardness when they kept me "okay" for so long? does it come when i finally leave? can it ever?
#babes i actually relate to the frigid angry woman more than im comfortable with but this time there's no prince coming to save her and idk#i was never beautiful but i was and am angry and capable and that's served me well but being angry is exhausting#it's a birthright i can't give to a younger sibling. it doesn't transfer.#i dont inspire devotion. there's no version of this that ends with me waltzing with a true love.#im not the type you launch a thousand ships for.#so what's left?#who am i when i have no one? when ive spent my life making *me* less to make others more? when im nothing but a useful piece of furniture.#i know God loves me! i love Him! but it's not the same. i want *people* to love me. i want to be someone that theyd fight for.#im feeling that 'women have minds and hearts but im so lonely' scene from little women 2019 so much right now.#except im not jo. my family loves me but theyd never do for me what jo's would do for her. theyre also all focused on surviving.#i feel like a military ration. there to be consumed but cast aside the moment something more palatable comes around.#how do i become consumed with joy? how do i let go of the cynicism? its all thats kept me safe! but its choking me too.#its like tony stark in iron man 2. the thing thats kept me alive this far is killing me. i need to find an alternative but its looking like#ill have to synthesize a new element to make it happen and that freaks me out.#ive always been derivative. never an individual. how do i become a trailblazer when my job was always to hold the hand of the one blazing#the trail? how do i become myself happy and free?#because i WANT to be more#i WANT to be more than anger and coldness and a useful idiot. i WANT to be me and be so so happy#but i dont know how to get there#and if someone suggests therapy im shooting you. i dont want to listen to one more person pretend to care about me and tell me#all the things i need to change and spend even longer not learning how to think for myself#i want to be more than this. but i also cant stand the thought of taking up any more space than i do#anyway.#anyone who's read all this thank you and i promise im fine im just in my feelings today lol#im going to work out and get some happy brain chemicals flowing and then ill take a shower and itll all be good.#please dont worry about me! im just having A Moment TM#lilac rambles
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It's interesting to note how the Tabris Origin, which involves a wedding, kidnapping and attempted sexual harassment, and fighting your way through an estate full of guards, is the Origin where gender plays a huge role in what story you experience. M!Tabris will always storm the castle coming to the rescue of his cousin and his betrothed, while F!Tabris will always have to fight her way out because the men in her life can't fully protect her (Nelaros dies, Soris literally hands her the sword, Cyrion is powerless to stop the abduction. Okay, this may be a little unfair to Soris who does fight side by side with Tabris and counsels caution the same way regardless of Tabris's gender). I'd go so far as to say that Tabris is the only Origin where the gender of your PC has a definite impact on the story.
TLDR to the rant in the tags: Tabris is constrained on all sides by being an elf, by their gender, in part by their family, and by society at large (both the Alienage and the wider city).
#bumble our guys are occupying my mind again. the origin defines their roles and experiences so#a lot has been said about the superficial equality of men and women in dragon age: they are equal from a legal point of view#both can become soldiers inherit or assume a position of political and social authority#but that's pretty much it#that experiment aside i think for the tabris story it's interesting. tabris is so contrained#don't go out of the alienage at night. don't anger the shem#don't carry weapons. don't insult them. live in squalor & misery with no hopes of social mobility. get married to a person you don't know#this happens to you because you are an elf. and this happens to you because you are playing as a man or a woman#the other origin where gendered violence might crop up is brosca and idk to what extent bc i haven't had much contact with f!brosca's story#but it would be just like beraht to make weird comments. aeducan gets a weird comment by trian too but that's it#but the alienage is a pressure cooker and the violence dealt unto its inhabitants has a perverse amount of nuance#unlike the circle which is another pressure cooker but a different one the alienage has a better life and more opportunities paraded in#*front of its inhabitants at every waking hour. the mages don't have that jarring contrast (they are reminded of how bad they have it in#*other ways but violence is much easier to normalize in closed communities. there is a reason uldred was able to stoke a rebellion after#*having been at ostagar. one taste of fresh air and that stuffy tower must've been hell awaiting. even wynne takes ger first chance to gtfo#the alienage however knows with striking clarity what it doesn't have. and that hurts. that stings. this ramble went way off track#but my main point is that tabris is constrained on all sides while at the same time having a better life dangled in front of their nose#*every single waking hour. no wonder their origin ends in massacre at their hands#the dam has broken loose. the water is finally cooking over and the pressure cooker explodes#tabris has a body count comparable to that of a seasoned criminal (brosca) and of a knight defending their invaded home (cousland)#which is freaking impressive if you ask me#dragon age#dao#dragon age origins#tabris#warden tabris#f!tabris#m!tabris#astala tabris
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mizora fans are the only safe side of the fandom for me
#from most safe to less safe#mizora tag i can enjoy evil woman and the occasional hate post#but she deserves that and it doesnt overrrun the tag#m*nthara tag is ok but some fans see her as more evil and more masc than i see her as#weird to me - cant relate#love Lae but the shadowzel hatef*cking ruined my engagement with other fans of hers#mystra tag i instafollow mystra-defenders#instablock mystra haters#literally on sight#because i read the whole post in the tag and i deserve compensation#mystra aint on the same level as c*zador#shes a pompous bitch who withholds blessings not a fcking p*mp/ tr*fficker#love shadowh*art but shes disrespected constantly and stripped of personality in the fandom to be: the woman#i dont follow the tags of the male characters anymore because the amount people will woobify them is legit unsafe#man puts a bomb in his chest because he couldnt take no for an answer#but people want to say “poor baby girl” the fuck?#man is just stupid and a tad scary#honestly sexy but i would be mystra 2.0 if i got with him#larian woobified ast*rion by removing the nuance on whether or not he deserved redemption#fandom performatively “likes” w*ll only when someone makes a big enough stink about him#i feel bad for actual fans because they love something that isnt actually there#his writing literally removes all agency for him#larian infantalized a grown ass black man to constantly be humiliated and removed the rightful anger he had in EA#i need people to admit that the writing is bad and IS racist and enables people to be racist in being dismissive with him#sometimes i do dip into the ast*rion tag tho because those artists know how to draw s*x with women#like those girlies have had s*x before and know what they want and they are so right for it#the wlw art in this fandom has no idea how s*x works#or its so male gazey and prnified it legit makes me squeemish
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I’m actually I think maybe more mad about the treatment Ethan got in that film. People talking about him like he’s James Bond and I will not stand for it. He’s never disrespected or diminished a female agent and he’s NEVER let a GF die not even in MI2 which was so bad it was retconned (unless I guess you count MI OG?? Like I wouldn’t but). He’s just nice. Benji has played damsel in distress more than anyone in the series. Furious they would even TRY to paint him that way.
#lIKE???? he doesn’t NOT kill the blonde girl because she’s a girl!!! he didn’t kill her because she was incapacitated before being dead and#he’s a good person and he doesn’t finish people off when he doesn’t have to! he thought about it! but he’s a good dude! I HATE them trying#to act like he’s fkn James Bond he is NOT!!!! ahhhh!!!! he just does not love killing he’s nice!!!#the man is not DEACON st JOHN or smth!!! MI one happened and now NOT being his father is 87% of Ethan’s personality that’s IT!!!#‘he always does this w women he thinks they’re all over their heads and need rescuing’ go fuck yourself it’s literally a comedic line in MI#Fallout — THE LAST MOVIE!! that Ilsa goes ‘you don’t understand what you’re involved in.’ and he goes ‘/I/ don’t understand what I’m#involved in??? //I// DONT UNDERSTAND WHAT IM INVOLVED IN??? … what am I involved in?😅’#Ilsa is introduced saving his ass. Julie - a civvie - spends the end of MI 3 killing people and bringing him back to life#and he’s like ‘you did all this? wow. 🥺💙’ Carter and he are parallels. tf you bitches mean did you even watch the show#I just have so much anger rn you cannot say this shit about my little guy#and I know it’s the lesser bad saying it but the narrative was trying to reinforce it#mission impossible dead reckoning#mission impossible dead reckoning spoilers
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There's something so specifically infuriating when someone uses one of your experiences or your demographic in an argument, especially if said argument is about spreading hatred or is just so wrong. They "speak on behalf of the ___" to say such fucked shit.
"You're not thinking of the ___!"
"I literally am ___. You saying that adds nothing as you do not speak for me or for other ___. Shut up."
#I really really hate it. It angers me in such a specific way that just skldjf ksdl#...#vent below. idk. I'm really sorry#Mad rambles#Terfs will be like “oh think of survivors! 'MEN' can share women's spaces!” like shut the actual fuck up. SHUT UP. Shut your damn mouth#A terf is so much more dangerous than a trans person. Me. a tiny cis woman is so much more dangerous to a terf than a transperson is.#Because I will obliterate you. How dare you say you speak on MY behalf? As if I don't know what I'm fucking talking about.#as if you're “protecting me” by spewing such bullshit? by treating someone as a danger when they're not?!#Especially when they believe it's a fucking TRUMP CARD. Like mentioning it means they're right!!! when obviously they're not!!!#Or when they think the fact that I'm cis will make me agree with them! I'm cis simply because I am. I'm not better or worse because of it#being cis doesn't mean I'm fine with bullshit though!#I really hate feeling almost as if like...idk I'm “known” for talking about this but it's just so so infuriating. people will act like they#know when they don't. Obviously every experience is different and terfs who are survivors I hope you find peace and my heart goes out to yo#but you also need to get your fucking head outta your ass. Saying such things isn't the way to heal and you're hurting others with it.#It's NOT about hating men or trans people! the “men are always violent/women are always victims” mentality needs to fuck off#as if it's just the script of life and that it's inescapable no matter what. that it's the truth even if circumstances say otherwise.#...I'm going to possibly block the epic tag for a bit. I have the name of the saga blocked but like... It's just genuinely upsetting.#my story got picked apart too on how it wasn't actually that bad. that I'm actually the fucking worst. “Men are just like that sweetie”#BULLSHIT!!! Gender doesn't dictate a person's morals. Being good and kind does. It doesn't matter what form that takes!#not even saying HE'S good and kind as he's horrible and wonderful at the same time but about this stuff? Do what you want but#I DO think you're insane if you see it as otherwise and it makes me wanna lock my door. You're not a bad person probably but also 🙃#I get that there's history but there's also the fucking TEXT.#I don't know. I'm really sorry#tw trauma#tw sa mention#I'm not necessarily against reblogging this (I don't care) but don't post with tags. please
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theres this one guy that lives on my floor who really likes asking me weird questions just so that he can go "actually thats not true 👆" to everything i say. im at that point where i see him in the halls and i immediately turn around and leave ToT
#last time he asked me about my opinion on trans people#he then proceeded to say some extremely transphobic things about trans women#just 5 minutes ago he asked me about immigrants#and then again proceeded to call them diseased and violent#i think he knows that i have anger problems and is trying to get me to react#he only asks me things that are personal to me#the immigrant thing made me feel like shit tho so hes hitting the bad spots for me#university sucks man
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Brick and Mortar ohhhhhh
#yotsuyu goe brutus#ff14#stormblood#stb#nemiarts#blood cw#girls when they kill jifuya and other pdfiles as a warning to the doman state < 3333333#and frame it as Yotsuyu's ghost with a rag face covered tall yokai accompanying her#those thta survived bc they were more like- u know the person who cleaned and had nowhere else to work or a family who regreted giving up#their child. nemi was really the party helping with nuance to Yotsuyu's anger#but if it was an offender or someone who truly did not give a shit/a client who mistreated the workers and took advantage to abuse well#nemi took the bandages off and you're dead lol#im pro sex work btw the place where Yotsuyu was trapped is unethical as they took her pimped by her family and def so many other women#look up about how fucking poor children were bought by brothels and groomed into this life in irl japan that's clearly what the devs were#going off from. the houses in kugane seem to have protections and agency placed in contrast?#i do think that sex worker in ala mhigo working on her own saying she only takes locals and people of the resistance as clients def focuses#difference in systems#this whole thing is a rage against an abusive exploitative system lol#yes i know the shitty line by hien was inserted by localization. doesnt change they just moved jifuya than to consider making a ruling or#something to make sure such shit wouldnt be repeated. the way enw rolequests for doma are dont help this
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the tiktokification of weird girls makes me so angry having colored hair and lots of trinkets on your bag doesn't make you a weird girl btw
#sorry but i get really angry about this#as an autistic woman weird girl as a label feels strangely personal to me and its gotten appropriated by conventionally attractive straight#skinny white women and it pushes out the actual weird girls who are often rejected by peers and bullied for various reasons#okay i know it's not that deep but im 17 years old with lots of anger inside me
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I was gonna say "what's wrong with Weeknd's music getting played in gay bars" but then I remembered how homophobic the Black community can be (it varies obviously but still)
#saw somebody ask why Drake know this and someone else you already know#or how I've seen people be cool with abusers and rapists as long as they ain't do any 'gay shit'#or how people will use 'Diddy' to mean either something horrific/abusive (valid) or to mean something gay#I've seen the entitled anger and hate towards Black men and women who are considered let highly attractive but are gay#like people be mad as hell if you a fine Black person but gay
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Double Standard Dictionary: A Guide to Things That Are Only "Problems" When Women Do Them
Let's have an honest conversation about something that drives me absolutely crazy. You know those little comments and judgments that somehow only seem to apply to women? Yeah, we need to talk about that.
The Professional Edition
When men vs. when women do the exact same thing:
He's assertive → She's aggressive
He's focused → She's cold
He's passionate → She's emotional
He's dedicated → She's obsessed
He's confident → She's arrogant
He's strategic → She's manipulative
He's busy → She's neglecting her life
The Dating Double Standards
The classics that never seem to die:
He's dated around → She has "a past"
He's a bachelor → She's "left on the shelf"
He's selective → She's picky
He's career-focused → She's married to her job
He's a social butterfly → She's attention-seeking
He's "finding himself" → She needs to settle down
He's direct → She's desperate
The Appearance Police
The endless contradictions:
Look professional, but not too try-hard
Be attractive, but not attention-seeking
Wear makeup, but keep it "natural"
Be fit, but not too muscular
Dress well, but not too sexy
Look youthful, but not immature
Age gracefully, but never look old
The Emotion Edition
How it's perceived:
His anger is justified → Her anger is hysteria
His sadness is deep → Her sadness is dramatic
His stress is from hard work → Her stress is from "not coping"
His excitement is enthusiasm → Her excitement is over-the-top
His concerns are valid → Her concerns are paranoid
His anxiety is pressure → Her anxiety is weakness
The Family Chronicles
The never-ending judgment:
He's babysitting → She's just parenting
He's helping around the house → She's doing her job
He's focused on work → She's neglecting family
He needs time to himself → She's selfish
He's weighing his options → She's wasting time
He's figuring out what he wants → Her clock is ticking
The Office Politics
Things I'm tired of seeing:
Men get mentored → Women get hit on
Men network → Women "sleep their way up"
Men are busy → Women "can't handle it"
Men are thorough → Women are perfectionists
Men delegate → Women are lazy
Men need work-life balance → Women are uncommitted
The Social Scene
The ridiculous expectations:
Be fun but not too wild
Be social but not too friendly
Be smart but not intimidating
Be successful but not threatening
Be independent but not difficult
Be strong but still need help
Be confident but still humble
The Success Paradox
What we're dealing with:
Be ambitious but not threatening
Lead but don't be bossy
Achieve but don't outshine
Negotiate but don't be demanding
Succeed but stay likeable
Excel but remain modest
Win but make it look effortless
The Reality Check
What this actually means for us:
Constant second-guessing
Walking on eggshells
Energy drain from overthinking
Imposter syndrome
Reduced authenticity
Limited self-expression
Unnecessary stress
The Way Forward
What we can do about it:
Call it out
Name the double standard
Question the logic
Point out the inconsistency
Support other women
2. Break the patterns
Reject unfair labels
Define success personally
Set our own standards
Celebrate authenticity
3. Change the narrative
Share success stories
Highlight achievements
Create new networks
Mentor others
To Every Woman Dealing With This
Remember:
You're not "too much"
Your achievements are earned
Your feelings are valid
Your ambitions are worthy
Your standards are important
Your voice matters
Your path is yours
#double standards#feminism#women supporting women#gender equality#women in business#women empowerment#professionalism#career woman#working women#gender bias#breaking barriers#womens rights#equality#girl power#career#empowerment#feminist rant#speak up
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now i dont know anything about anything of course, but isnt it kinda fucked to implement restorative justice while leaving the systemic and cultural root causes untouched
#not saying it doesnt work cause i dont know#my point is you (the state) leave things that generate problems as they are and pretend to fix them on a personal basis#which again that could very well happen but it will never be the same as preventing the problem in the first place#but by not tackling the causes youre kinda implying that is is the same but that is. not true. its fucked actually#also the justice system cant do the same things the state does (is supposed to do) so it cant possibly take your place#im not gonna lie this stemmed from a personal feeling of anger rather than dispassionate analysis of the topic#but when its used in cases of violence against women by men isnt this just reinforcing existing imbalances instead of minimizing them#if applied to discriminatory crimes restorative justice ALONE feels like a discriminatory act because you dont fix discrimination#you should eradicate it#any other approach is bound to be insufficient AND indirectly reaffirms the logic of discrimination itself
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𝝑𝑒 synopsis. tired of the continuous bullying you’re receiving from the other concubines, you finally decide to stand up for yourself. the tension dulls when lord sukuna breaks the fight up.
tags. true form!ryomen sukuna x concubine!reader. sfw - angst kinda, little suggestive. mentions of bullying. violence. fighting. vile language. reader gets referred to as a ‘bitch, slut, whore’ by the concubines. reader gets referred to as ‘brat, woman’ by sukuna. not beta read bcs im sleepy. @ohimsummer, thank you for the idea LOL
you’re tired. tired of being treated like less by the others in sukuna’s harem. they’re salty—jealous—because of the shameless favoritism sukuna shows. you’re his favorite, the one he can’t seem to get enough of.
that’s exactly why you’re on the floor right now. you’ve fallen to your knees after tripping over a concubine’s foot. you were passing by to go to your headquarters, though apparently such a mundane thing can’t happen in this place without some woman interfering in the worst way possible.
“oops,” the blonde one laughs as she sees you on the wooden floor. you’re covered in food and some. . . gooey beverage. you don’t know what it is, but it’s making everything feel uncomfortably sticky. your clothes, your fingers, your skin. it’s starting to itch.
“should’ve looked where you were going,” another girl chimes in. the brunette. she feigns pity and throws a handkerchief in your face, causing the other concubines to giggle. there are three of them in total. they always stick together to bully you.
the one with green eyes speaks up as well, “now now, don’t be so harsh to the poor slut! she’s got no brain to use after all.”
the other two laugh as you try your best to stay calm. you’re always telling yourself to be the bigger person in difficult situations. you’re clenching your hands into fists, your body basically trembling in anger. you want to swing. to show them that you’re worthy of respect.
“aww, she’s gonna cry,” the blonde one pouts—a mocking pout that gets on your nerves. the laughs sounding from the trio are like nails on a chalkboard. you want to make it stop. you’re tired of keeping it civil, when they have never tried doing the same.
your eyes land on the serving tray next to your hands. the one they emptied on your head ‘by accident’. you take a deep breath and try to remind yourself that it’s probably best to go wash up. they desperately want a reaction out of you and you refuse to give it to them.
despite it all, you’re mad. you’ve gone through enough of this. all because of sukuna’s favoritsm. all because you’re you.
they’re salty that they can never be you. you’ve seen their pathetic attempts to put you down yet simultaneously try and copy your entire existence. thinking that would somehow get them in your position as sukuna’s favorite.
you’re sick and tired of it. today’s the day you show them exactly that. you’re going to show those women that you can and will beat some sense into them.
“oy, dumb slut, answ—” the blonde is interupted before she could finish her sentence. a loud bang reverberates through the hallway and everyone falls silent.
she’s the one on the floor now instead of you. you’re up, the wooden tray in your hands, the one you just used to smack the life out of her. she’s whimpering and holding her red cheek. a nasty bruise is sure to form on her skin; deserved.
“i’ll answer you, alright,” you mumble under your breath. you’re panting as the adrenaline keeps pumping. you stand over her and lift up the serving platter in the air once more—bringing it down over and over against her head, which she’s trying to shield with her hands.
the other two concubines are frozen in pure shock. you’re not thinking anymore. you’re on autopilot. the woman’s yelps and screeches are music to your ears. “hah. you sound as ugly as you look,” you spit on her, watching the blood trickle down the corner of her mouth. you lift your arms up to bring the wooden platter down on her body again, but you’re stopped.
the green eyed concubine had moved first. she grabs your wrists with one hand and smacks you across the face with the other. “have you lost your mind?!” she yells and raises her hand to slap you again. the disrespect you’re showing clearly was not expected nor is it welcomed.
“don’t you fucking touch me,” you kiss your teeth. you’re glaring at her with pure hatred. you push and slap her right back. you’re sure the blonde won’t be up for a while now—she’s done for.
you don’t know if you went a bit overboard with it, considering she’s barely conscious anymore, but you couldn’t care less at the moment.
you’re surprised when the third concubine yanks your hair. “oh, you little bitch!” the brunette grabs a bunch of your hair with both hands and tugs at it to drag you down on the floor. you wince in pain but quickly pull at her own brown locks. you struggle to keep your balance and your scalp aches.
you hate it when women go for your hair when fighting, though luckily you know your way out of it. you take a deep breath and bring her head down, lifting your left leg up at the same time. her forehead comes crashing down on your knee and she loosens her grip on your hair.
“disgusting,” you huff and take the opportunity to push her fragile body aside, making her trip over the blonde girl on the floor. you can’t help but think that your current state is quite similar to a certain someone.
the violence. the seething anger. you’ve seen this scene way too many times before. you’ve learnt it from him.
your thoughts are interrupted by someone pulling the back of your hair, causing you to stumble backwards. “a whore like you needs to be taught some manners,” the green eyed concubine sniffs and keeps a tight grip on your hair. she delivers a few punches to your face, which you actually struggle to block for a second.
the force hitting your nose makes it bleed. that only angers you further. you gather some saliva in your mouth before spitting it out right in the girl’s eyes. you take your chance and grab her hair, smashing her head against the nearby fusuma. the thin plaster the sliding doors are made out of breaks, and she falls right through into the other room.
“i think you all need to be taught how to act,” you pant and wipe the blood dripping down your chin with the back of your hand. you walk through the opening you made in the frail door, kicking the concubine right in the face as revenge for the nosebleed she gave you.
you crouch down, your fingers tangling into her hair. you yank her head up and stare her right in the eyes. there’s an eerie, dark look in yours. “why can’t you just accept that you’re nothing but trash in your lord’s eyes?” you sneer. you are pitying them instead of the other way around, like how it usually would be.
and they despise it.
“you fucking—” “bitch? slut? whore?” you finish her sentence for her with an exasperated sigh. you’ve heard those insults a thousand times before. it’s nothing new. it’s always the same nasty and repetitive comments. you slap the concubine in front of you again for good measure before standing up, “you should come up with something new. it’s getting boring.”
you walk over to the other two, who are still recovering. you add to your last comment with a shrug, trying to hit them where it hurts, “your repetitiveness explains why lord sukuna rarely calls for you at night. i bet your severe lack of creativity shows even in bed.”
“you’re just a boring and hopeless bunch,” you’re out for blood. the blonde and brunette are looking up at you with fear and the sight excites you for some reason. they’re crawling away, trying to go find someone who would save them. the servants are nowhere to be found. nor is uraume, who usually stops the petty arguments.
they’re terrified by how you’re acting right now. they’re clearly seeing sukuna in you. in your eyes and the aura you’re emitting.
you’re mirroring him, his merciless personality and all included. he’s subconsciously taking over your mind and it’s terrifying them.
your steps are heavy as you walk towards the concubines. you don’t pay attention to the blood trickling down your chin, nor do you care about the ache in your scalp from the earlier hair pulling. all you care about is getting revenge for yourself.
you could complain to sukuna and have him punish them in your place, but that wouldn’t be enough. you’re going to make sure that they don’t try you again any time soon. you grab the blonde by her arm, lifting your fist to punch her—
“oi, brat.”
your eyes widen and you snap out of your mad daze. sukuna’s voice shakes the floors with how loud it is. you whip your head to the side and see his tall figure standing at the end of the hallway—uraume being right behind him. it looks like they were the one that rushed to inform sukuna of the ruckus.
you drop the other concubine and look at the mess. the broken fusuma. the blood splatter on the wooden flooring. your disheveled hair and clothes. your bleeding nose. the crimson stained plate and spilt food that got everywhere.
it’s a complete mess.
sukuna doesn’t utter a word. he just glares right at you. you’re not sure if it’s because of your irresponsible behaviour or the mess you created. or both. he marches over to you and grabs you by the back of your collar with one big hand.
“m-my lord,” you whimper, nearly choking as you’re held up in the air like you weigh nothing, like one would do to a cat’s nape. one of sukuna’s hands keeps you up whilst the others hang limply by his side. his red eyes scan your body, moving up and then back down.
you don’t know what to say. you surely have overstepped a boundary - or multiple - with what you’ve done today. you’ve disturbed the peace in the estate and have caused damage to sukuna’s property. both to his women and the interior of his palace.
you cough up a bit of blood that was stuck in the back of your throat. you’re uncertain of how you should explain yourself. “i’m sorry, my lord. i didn’t know what came over me,” you apologise and look down at the floor below your feet. you’re too embarrassed to look the king of curses in the eyes.
sukuna stays silent. it’s nerve wracking since you have no idea what he’ll do in response to your outburst. his facial expression is blank, so you aren’t able to guess what’s going on in his head. it’s a complete mystery.
however, the tall man is secretly more amused than anything. what you’ve just done, is one of the most interesting things he has seen a human do. sukuna witnessed everything from the beginning to the end and thoroughly enjoyed it. from the way you used that serving plate as a weapon to the way you managed to get out of those concubines’ grasps each time.
it’s strange to sukuna; he felt something when he saw you in action like that.
pride? perhaps that’s it. sukuna can’t pinpoint the exact emotion, though if he were to describe it, the closest word would be indeed pride. he is proud to have discovered and witnessed that untamed side of yours. you’re always full of pleasant surprises that keep even a dangerous curse like him on his toes.
it’s why he will never get bored of you. he wishes to unleash your full potential one day.
sukuna finally breaks the silence with an amused snicker. one of his hands move to wipe the blood from your nose. you cringe when he slowly licks the red liquid from his fingers afterwards—clearly ravishing the metallic taste.
“y’ finally did something, huh?” sukuna grins wickedly. he knows of the harassment you’ve been going through and he couldn’t wait to see you snap like this one day.
it’s sickening that he allows the bullying to continue just for the sake of creating drama, but it’s also worth it to him, since he’s got to unlock a side of you he knew you had buried deep inside. sukuna is a selfish bastard. you know that much, yet you like it when he looks at you with a prideful gaze and grin.
it’s so obvious that sukuna took pleasure in what he’s witnessed. he couldn’t believe how much you actually resembled him in a way.
if he were to be honest: it turned him on like crazy. seeing how you fought back against those women and how nearly deranged you became. the degrading words you spewed. . . sukuna cannot get enough of it. if it were up to him, he’d have let you continue. but for your own sake, he decided against it.
as much as he loves that untamed side of yours, sukuna knew that he couldn’t let you go too far. not because he wants to defend those other women, but because he still needs you to stay sane. going down that path of violence surely will do you more damage than good.
he’ll fully corrupt you - your body and mind - one day. just not today.
sukuna lets you back on your feet after you nearly fail to breathe. he cocks his head to the side, still having a menacing smirk on his face. he roughly pinches your cheek, “it was entertaining, i’ll give you that, woman.”
you wince as sukuna pinches the exact cheek you had a bruise on. he’s never done so before, therefore you don’t have a clue about the meaning behind that gesture. though the compliment told you that he was pleased by the ruckus more than he was annoyed by it.
sukuna still hasn’t bat an eye to the other concubines. they are waiting for their lord to punish you for hurting them, but it all seems to be in vain. they know better than to speak up about that to him. they’re easily replaceable. they know that by now. it’s as clear as day.
you’ve drilled that into their head today.
the king of curses pushes your small body towards uraume and you nearly bump against their chest with how easily he moved you around. uraume catches you in time and helps you stand straight, awaiting their master’s orders.
sukuna checks you out one more time in that disheveled state, before you go back to your formal and reserved self. his interest in you has been piqued by today’s events and he wonders when he can experience that side of yours again. he nods at uraume, “make sure she’s properly taken care of.”
uraume doesn’t waste a single second after being given an order. “understood,” they reply curtly and keep you steady so you could walk with them towards the physician’s quarters.
you look up at sukuna, trying to catch a glimpse of him before you’re taken away. he’s staring right back at you, the corners of his lips twitching into another subtle grin. he’s surprisingly pleased and content with your actions.
however it’s also not so surprising, considering that he loves it when you show any hint of resistance or stubbornness. whether it’d be to him or to his concubines.
sukuna’s facial expression turns cold the moment you’re gone and he’s left with the mess. “she took the words right out of my mouth,” he stares down at the three women on the floor who’re still unable to stand. he’s not helping them up—that’s their own problem, “y’re a pathetic bunch.”
the concubines flinch as they hear the inevitable from their own lord. hearing it from you was frustrating, but hearing it directly from the man that’s taken them in is heartbreaking. they don’t dare look up at him in such pitiful states.
“all three of you,” sukuna addresses them sharply. his arms cross over his chest, a ruthless tone to his voice. the concubines tremble in his presence, though it’s partially still because of the fear you’ve implemented in their systems.
he would’ve killed them off right then and there, though you’ve done enough damage to them both physically and mentally for now.
sukuna however, still couldn’t care less about their wellbeing. their wounds and bruises are something they’ll need to fix on their own.
he points at the floor and broken door with his head before turning around to leave the miserable trio. sukuna leaves them with an order that’s usually left to the servants;
“clean up the damn mess you caused. it better be taken care of before i return. ‘nd i don’t wanna hear a single squeak from any of you about this.”
#sttoru writes.#jjk x reader#sukuna x reader#jjk x you#sukuna x you#jjk x y/n#sukuna x y/n#ryomen sukuna x reader#jjk angst#sukuna angst#bye this is also a crack fic to me
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