#and willy genuinely annoyed just going ''from /who/?''

[dysaniadisorder]

oohh boy. i cant do this

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#34: The Trapped (1.04)

gif cred: @machonnes

Who knew it would take getting trapped to help Richonne finally let some of that tension between them get released 👌🏽...

After Rick basically breaks Michonne’s heart far worse than he tried to do in ep 3, the two still have to work together to make it past these walkers. And one thing about Richonne is that adrenaline-heavy activities always seem to bring them closer together..and also get them in the mood. 😌

So Richonne is in a hall taking a bunch of walkers out like only they can but then they both go for the same walker at the same time. A rare moment of Richonne being in sync but not in sync.

gif cred: @perryabbott

Michonne looks at Rick and says through gritted teeth, “I had this.” And then Rick is all snarly and defensive saying, “I had this.” And I was like if this man does not fix his tone. 🙃 He already has eight strikes at this point. Plus I was like…Rick, why are you having this annoyed energy with her, when you’re the one who has been doing the most hurtful stuff?? 😑

gif cred: @perryabbott

And then Rick wants to try it even more by removing his blade from the walker and splattering some of the gunk on Michonne’s face. Now y’all, this was nawt funny to me when I first watched it cuz I was so in my feelings. 😂

gif cred: @perryabbott

I quickly could see the humor people see in it of course, but when I was in the thick of my feelings during that first watch my extra self was like excuse me Rick, didn’t Father Gabriel go blind getting that stuff in his face?? 😑 Out here all willy-nilly with your wife.

Lol, I was all out of strikes to give at this point.

But, now watching this, I smile because these two are genuinely comedians together. 😂

Michonne looks at him ticked and says, “Really?” And fortunately, Rick has enough sense to know he was wrong for that when he says “Sorry” and then quickly scurries away to kill more walkers. That was cute I admit lol. 🤭 Rick looks like for a brief moment he finally realizes he tried it and is in trouble with his wife.

gif cred: @perryabbott

I also like the use of clashing red and blue light in this scene both for the visual and because I feel like Rick has been associated a lot with red light throughout TOWL and Michonne with more of blue lighting - i.e the difference in their lights during the tunnel scenes in ep 3.

And the way these red and blue lights are making purple here (fittingly, the color of royalty 👑) it’s almost like it paints the picture of how Rick and Michonne are clashing but still somehow on the verge of merging and coming back together. That might be an extra-as-hell observation but hey I told myself I was gonna try to write out every observation I have. 😋

gif cred: @figmentof

So then Richonne run up these stairs as the building continues to aggressively buckle and crack. A walker nearly grabs Michonne and Rick tells her to hug the wall with that irritated tone again and I was very much not here for that, cuz like why does it sound like he's scolding her or something? 🤨

I get Rick is also antsy cuz he’s not trying to have anything happen to her but still I feel like this was giving early season 3 Rick when he’d occasionally have that little posturing sternness with Michonne...and we’ve done come too far to be reverting back to that.

Michonne retorts, “I know that” cuz she doesn’t need the reminder. And then that huge chandelier comes falling down on them. That chandelier ends up being a blessing in disguise y’all, cuz Richonne needed something that was going to snap them out of this funk.

And whenever I hear Michonne still yell that concerned "lookout!" I’m just like aw even when Rick is being mean as hell she still looks out for him. 😊

gif cred: @ricksmarlene

After the fade to black, it’s shown that the chandelier has trapped Michonne’s leg so she’s stuck. I do like that the first thing we see is Rick right by her side tucked away in that corner with her because you know he probably was real panicked thinking this chandelier hurt Michonne and of course, he wants to try to fix it.

At first, you just hear their breathing and then Nat comes to his girl’s aid once again when Michonne uses his lighter to see better. Rick asks if she can move her leg and Michonne softly says, “Yeah it’s just trapped. If I can just…” and she tries to lift it but this thing is heavy and it won’t budge.  

gif cred: @nerd4music

Rick says, “Okay on the count of three” and they try to lift it together but it still won’t budge. They can see and hear walkers coming up the stairs and so Michonne shows that she too can make unserious statements like Rick when she says, “You should go.”

But that’s not even remotely an option to Rick so he doesn’t respond to that and just tells her, “Grab that. Handle those, while I get this thing.”

Michonne says, “Rick, how? There’s no time. You’ve got to go.” And I knew no matter what version of Rick this is, no version’s leaving her here to die. He’d rather die 1000 times himself than let that happen.

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

There may be a part of Michonne that is genuinely telling Rick to go because she doesn't want the love of her life to die here on the stairwell if she can't break loose. But I also could see that, because Rick has been continually suggesting they have to just part ways and essentially never know each other's fate anyway, she might be feeling like 'What's the difference between leaving me here now or leaving me later?'

However, above all, she knew Rick would never just walk away from her here because they love each other and because - do I even need to reiterate it? - Richonne are...

I like how once again, Rick does not even address the idea of leaving her behind and just starts talking about how the bolts are holding this thing together. And when a walker comes Rick swiftly takes it out and then intently returns to trying to remove the bolts. Michonne turns some walkers into a kabob using her stick and when it gets particularly dicey Rick comes through to give her a knife to use. 

More walkers start making their way closer and so Michonne again tells Rick, “You’ve gotta go.” And this time Rick does respond to it and I love the response.

He just looks right at her and tells her, “That is never happening.” Y'all, I was so mad at him and then I heard him say this and was instantly smiling. This was a heartwarming line.😊

I like how Rick didn't just want to say 'that's not happening," but rather said 'that is never happening" because he knows there are literally zero scenarios where he'd ever abandon her in this state.

gif cred: @nat111love

Now, don’t get me wrong, I still felt some major apologies were needed from Sergeant Major Grimes after the gym scene, but it was nice to hear him say he'd never leave her here, especially because you know that’s what he was thinking in his head every time Michonne suggested he should go.

Rick immediately positions himself to be on the other side of her so he can shield her and take out the walkers. And Michonne is glad Rick was able to articulate that he’s never leaving when she says, “I just needed to hear that.” 

All along she knew telling him he needed to go was crazy and not something they’d ever do. She just needed Rick to see that. She turned this near-death experience into a helpful learning experience for him lol. And the lesson of the day: We don't leave each other behind. 😌

I love the way this episode uses Michonne being literally trapped by the chandelier to parallel Rick being trapped by the CRM. And just like Rick said he’d never want to leave Michonne trapped like this, she’s not trying to leave Rick trapped in his form of imprisonment either.

Honestly, Michonne should have a counselor certificate because all her methods this ep are slowly but surely helping Rick deprogram and see the light. 👌🏽

They keep trying to lift as Rick takes out walkers and eventually they’re able to get the chandelier off her together. I like how the only way it works is through Richonne working together and how with Michonne in a state where she can’t save herself, she’s able to have Rick here wholly determined to protect her. 😊

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

And while of course for us we have no fear of either of them meeting their demise in this scene, it is technically a life or death situation and it’s nice seeing Rick be so committed to either saving his wife from this situation or dying trying.

gif cred: @nat111love

Michonne stands up and Rick again checks on her asking, “You okay?” Michonne looks in his eyes and says, “Yeah. Thank you.”

gif cred: @machonnes

And then the Rick we know makes a return as he softly and sincerely tells Michonne, “You never have to thank me ever.” 😭 I loved this line so much when I first heard it and love it every time since. 👏🏽🥹

I appreciate how much Rick feels like protecting her is not a burden or obligation. He literally feels that it’s his design to do so. So to Rick, thanking him for this is like thanking him for breathing.

And it’s just really sweet to me that Rick who is known to thank Michonne every chance he gets for everything, doesn’t even feel Michonne needs to tell him thank you once. Like he really said never ever. 🥲

gif cred: @nat111love

He knows and reveres the absolutely priceless gift Michonne is in his life and in each of his children's lives and that’s more than enough to him. So yeah that line was great. 🥰

And Danai knew what she was doing because I wasn’t sure how she was gonna be able to get Rick back in good graces after the gym scene but “that is never happening” and “you never have to thank me ever” were very effective in reminding of the lovable man Rick is underneath who he's been presenting to be the last 30 minutes.

As disappointed as I was with Rick's gym behavior, those two lines on the stairwell made me check myself and say let me not forget that at the end of the day...

He's not completely in the clear yet, but these moments were signature Rick Grimes, loving and being there for Michonne and it was refreshing to see that undying devotion.

That bonding moment of nearly dying together on a stairwell brings Rick and Michonne more in sync as they run upstairs and take out walkers. It’s nice to see them a bit more in unison. It’s like getting literally unstuck from that chandelier made them start to get a bit more unstuck with each other as well. 

Rick notes they need to go back to the room since that side hasn’t started bumping and shaking yet…but honey, it will. 😏

And it will all be because of Richonne and their much-needed, highly anticipated, long-awaited, so-hot-it-could-melt-your-screen, unforgettable moment of reconnection. 😌👌🏽 

[magpie-murder]

Hello. I hope you don't mind I use your askbox to vent, but poeple calling MCU Loki "God of Stories" is really pissing me off. His official title is God Loki and mistagging him only clogs the tag for actual God(dess) of Stories Loki from the comics.

I don't know if poeple mistag because they think it's going to give them more engagement (hello, this is Tumblr, not Twitter or Instagram), but this practice is both extremely annoying and counterproductive. Poeple who use the Enchantricks tags don't want to see Loki/Sylvie content, and Loki/Sylvie shippers have their own tags so mistagging is absolutely useless and only brings negative engagement. Same goes for every characters who get mistagged. Sylvie fans don't call her "Lady Loki", I don't think a single B-15 fan is going to call her Verity in the long term (we all have our HC names for her anyways ^^), etc...

I really wish poeple understood that. I've only seen anti-series fans complain about that, but as a fan of both the series and the comics, when I go to the God of the Stories time, it's to look at pictures of AoA Loki. Mistagging is just like putting a mess on the library shelves, it is lazy and serves no other purpose than annoy the next user.

yes, holy shit, i hate it. i'm genuinely leaving the fandom over this, ditching this blog and making a new one and everything. the only thing that stuff like this does is demoralize people.

our discord server is trying our best to implement a new comic loki tagging system because of this crosstagging problem. not a lot of people are using it yet, but these are the tags we're trying to get people to use in addition to normal comic book tags (it would help a TON if people went back and added these to their old 616)

#the echo of a scream — kid loki (comics only)

#moon queen and magic theatre — god(dess) of stories loki (comics only)

#the magpie who whispers — ikol/agent loki (comics only)

#human lie detector. the best and only friend — verity willis (comics only)

[thenightling]

Willy Wonka misconceptions

As Charlie and the Chocolate Factory / Willy Wonka has become weirdly popular lately because of the successful prequel film and most recently that really botched / rip-off Wonka event in Glasgow Scotland, it felt like a good time for this post.

Here are a list of popular misconceptions about the book and films.

1. Much of the Internet thinks of Wonka as a "Serial killer of children." I pointed out that at the end of the 2006 film and novel you see the children alive, though altered. And in the 1971 film that version of Wonka says that they will all be fine, but a little wiser. Someone tried to argue with me that he was just trying to placate Charlie. Really!? Since when did that Wonka ever lie to make people feel better?

Based on his previous behavior we have no reason to believe Wonka would lie just to make Charlie feel better. It's just a dark, edgy, annoying headcanon to pretend Wonka killed those other kids when every version tells you they survived.

____________________________

2. Grandpa Joe was not "Faking it" or "being lazy." It seems ironic to me that so many rant and even get genuinely angry about the character Grandpa Joe. It is especially odd to me when the rage is in regard to the depiction in the 1971 film, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory.

The reason it is odd to me is because in the 1971 film Grandpa Joe very clearly was suffering through severe depression, possibly a long bipolar depression phase.

The depression is clear in his "I've got a golden Ticket" song.

"I never thought my life could be Anything but catastrophe"

"I never had a chance to shine Never a happy song to sing"

It seems weird to me that today people shame characters like Cinderella for not being assertive and empowered when she's a live-long abuse victim. And then you have the people against Disney's The Little Mermaid who say she gave up who and what she is for a man but ignore that she had a song number from before she ever saw Eric, where she expressed body dysphoria and made clear she wanted to be human even then.

And you have a large part of the Internet shaming Grampa Joe for being "lazy" and "faking being sick' while he's literally telling us that he he's been in a severe depression.

It's almost like watching a generation that supposedly respects mental illness and understands depression in ways previous generations didn't... suddenly having a justification to shame someone for having all the symptoms of clinical depression.

Hell, even the song "I've got a Golden Ticket" kind of indicates Grandpa Joe is entering a manic phase. If Grandpa Joe's illness is psychological why do we treat it as not-real? I get so annoyed at how many people mock the character or act like he's a con artist exploiting Charlie.

________________________

3. The Oompa Loompas were not slaves.

It's true that the earliest depictions of the Oompa Loompas were little African people (before the novel was revised) but in all versions he tells the kids that he pays them in coca-beans. That might sound like he pays them in fallen acorns he found in his garden but it's made clear that to Oompa Loompas, in their society, coca-beans are worth more than gold.

Try to imagine you got a job working for aliens who offer to pay you in large bars of gold if you just help him make some gold jewelry. But because gold isn't worth THAT much to these aliens they think you're a pathetic slave, even though Lofty (the Oompa Loompa from the new Wonka movie) probably now has a palace on Loompa Land that he uses as a summer house.

Interesting bit of trivia: Charlie was originally going to be black.

___________________________

4. Wonka (2023) is NOT a remake. A lot of people mistakenly think this is yet another remake. No. It's a musical prequel to the Gene Wilder Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory movie from 1971. ________________________

5. Lots of fans have "figured out" that the shoe shine boy Wonka sees early in Wonka is Charlie. One small problem with that. This is twenty-something Willy Wonka. Wonka was supposed to be pushing fifty or sixty when he went looking for an heir. The timeline wouldn't work. The director has confirmed that for this reason the shoe shine boy is NOT Charlie Bucket.

And there you go. A list of popular Wonka misconceptions debunked.

[melishade]

95 please

This ask game

Willy finding out about Optimus' library in the Chaos Timeline: Part 6: Willy and Optimus’ continued building relationship

Willy could tell that Optimus looked annoyed at seeing him in his library. He didn't mean to make him annoyed though.

This all started out of curiosity. Willy and the Marleyans have been building relationships with Paradis in response to the Decepticon known as Soundwave, dismantling the world governments to try and accomplish reuniting the Decepticon cause. At least that's what Matthew, or Megatron, had surmised. It's been an uneasy alliance, and Willy still found himself betrayed by Mat-Megatron, but Willy found himself getting along with the other metal titan, Optimus Prime.

The two had civilized conversations, and Optimus genuinely reminded him of what he believed Helos to have been if he was real. His talks with the Prime had allowed for the alliance to actually continue. During their alliance, Willy was speaking with Queen Historia in Wall Sina when he had heard some college students discussing returning books to the 'Metal Titan's library'. That obviously got his attention. What library could they possibly be talking about?

When the Tybur had some free time, he snuck away from the Marleyans and Paradis military investigate. He figured it would be safe since no one knew what he looked liked, let alone what a Tybur was. He ended up following some students and they ended up going to the library. Willy found it, and was surprised at the vast knowledge on display. However, he was still dumbfounded. Metal titan? What titan could they be talking about?

Willy had turned to leave, but froze when he saw Optimus' human form walking in with another student, thanking him for his donation before the student left. And now...he was face to face with the annoyed Prime.

"Optimus Prime," Willy greeted nervously, "Fancy seeing you here."

"How did you find out about this place?" Optimus asked bluntly.

"I...overheard some students," Willy admitted, causing Optimus to sigh.

"I tend to forget the public holding me in high regards," Optimus said as he set the book he got from the student down on the table.

"So...you own a library?" Willy asked him.

"This library was a gift from the Survey Corps," Optimus explained, "They gave it to me a year after staying on this planet."

"It's a very thoughtful gift, but I didn't think you were a scholar," Willy confessed, "Sure, a military diplomat, but..."

"You thought I shared the same profession as Megatron," Optimus concluded.

"You both are skilled fighters," Willy retorted.

"Before the war, Megatron was a gladiator, but I was an archivist," Optimus explained, "I had no knowledge of combat, but I had more knowledge on historical records."

"And...you've opened the library up to the public?" Willy questioned.

"I find it unwise to hoard this knowledge all for myself," Optimus reasoned, "Students are usually the most popular demographic who come into these walls."

Wily looked over at the shelves and couldn't help but admire the way everything was set up and maintained. There was clear dedication and love for his craft. From the way the shelves were set up, to the way the books were cleaned, Optimus truly cared about this place.

"Do not tell the Marleyans about this place," Optimus ordered Willy, causing the Tybur to turn to him.

"Excuse me?" Willy tilted his head in confusion.

"Do not tell the Marleyans of my library," Optimus repeated, "I know full well the Marleyans will take advantage of any perceived weaknesses in order to find reason to attack. I do not want Marleyans coming here to harass the people who seek knowledge. And I do not want the Marleyans to attack this place out of malice. These people come here for help, and this should be a safe place for them."

Willy knew that Optimus cared about the people on the island, but through this simple act, he could see just how much the public appreciated him and his work. They come to him to see help and guidance, and it's clear that they show respect to him. Who was Willy to take that away from them both?

"...okay. I swear I won't tell another soul about your library," Willy declared.

"Thank you," Optimus said.

(Optimus and Willy's relationship is something I don't explore too often in the prompts, so I'm glad that I did. #71 has been asked but the rest is free game.)

[3416]

the thing is, i wouldn't be nearly as bothered about mitch not being on the top line if it wasn't being treated as some kind of proof that he's never been good enough to play there and that it hurts the team or drags auston down when he does. i don't care about domi ultimately, he's an effective player (when he's not taking boneheaded penalties) and obviously it helps to spread out our best guys to make each line that little bit harder to play against by forcing the other team to decide how to matchup. whatever. i don't agree with keefe's choices there but i get the intent.

what i do care about is one of the best players this franchise has ever seen being treated like some kind of anchor holding the team (and auston specifically) back from achieving greatness and using domi's success with auston (BECAUSE of auston tyvm) to paint him as some selfish jealous (genuinely wtf @ this fanfiction in particular coming from an actual media guy) brat pouting over being ~demoted~ when he's never not done what has been asked of him (which is literally fucking everything) and has always been fully on board any time he's been paired with johnny!! or anyone else!! like these are all mitch's guys!!! he loves them and this team /so much/!!!! like i genuinely can't imagine the list of things he loves more than being a leaf is very long

i'm just so tired of so many (non-tumblr) fanspaces being dominated by people who have made an entire personality out of treating him like one of the worst things that's ever happened to the leafs (and, again, auston specifically) because idk they hate his dumb dad (welcome to the club weirdos!!!) and/or can't "forgive" him for his contract. even the critique of him in the playoffs is overblown in comparison to the rest of the team and the goalposts for what it means to be a ~playoff performer~ always seem to find a way to shift as needed to single him out as some kind of unique failure among the group which.. rme for all time

anyway sorry for venting lmao it's just such a bummer but WHATEVER here's to mitchell daniel marner having the best damn playoffs of his damn life!!!!!!!! go leafs go

ohhh anon. so many things i can (and will) say here, but you and i are totally on the same wavelength, lol. that's what has made this stretch so much worse imo... auston on a hot streak with two mid guys and workable chemistry (for now) all around, and we try spreading out the "offense" but actually... for the leafs... i think spreading the offense is less what we're doing w 1634 and more... shifting defensive responsibility off of our 'top' line and giving them easier matchups by putting the tougher ones with the mcmann-jt-marner line bc mitch is there now to take on some more defensive responsibility that isn't doable by players like willy/whoever else plays rw there. (which annoys me in it's own way bc it makes the 'top' line look more impressive stat wise while not even dealing with the most dangerous 'top' line on the other team, lol but.. it's still gonna require auston to be On Top of it all the time bc he's by himself defensively.. only reason it annoys me is the discourse afterward too like anyway). mitch and auston are our best all around players by quite a bit, lol, so i get WHY splitting them up works well too, but when people get mad that they're together so much... when they've proven to work better and be more dangerous year after year as a duo... i mean, peoples anger should be at the rest of the lineup that sometimes doesn't pull their own weight in that regard, lol. i get the experiment we're running rn. i'm not confident it will work, but we will see. i don't care if it does or doesn't... doesn't change the fact that ultimately, i know they want to play together the most and that hasn't changed bc of some randos that came in this year so. i genuinely think auston requests to play with mitch often after not being allowed to for a couple years, and this year he's sucking it up for the playoffs and trying something different for the sake of the team.

as for the way a lot of people treat mitch as expendable... it's so frustrating to me too... just the double standards abt him vs anyone else are insane. even tonight, seeing people lose their fucking minds over max reposting a fan's hype video without credit and assuming he made it (?? lol) and drooling all over themselves about how he "has the passion", but like... mitch had a video made last year and people were telling him to get off social media and perform better in the playoffs in the exact same spaces like. if he even comes on social media near the playoffs, it's always just hateful. honestly.... so many leaf fans don't deserve him and don't deserve to see a cup in their entire lifetimes either, lol. it makes my relationship with this team so much more complicated to have such a hate for the fanbase like that. like . this year, i just care so much less about the team as a whole too. i'm less connected to the overall results, lmao. i love the leafs and want my guys specifically to be able to win the cup in their lifetime more than anything, but i realllyyy don't care about some of these ppl on our team and i hate how the worst fans in this fanbase feel so vindicated over the dumbest ugliest shit. like i'd give anything to not have to see braindead opinions for a single day. as much as i'm rooting for them, if this isn't the year... well. we move, lol. i wouldn't die! (which is exactly why they'll prob do it this year lol) i'll feel competitive while watching the playoffs, esp vs the bruins, but like... whatever happens happens man. my men will be coming back and i hope some other ones won't, regardless of playoff results. sometimes it's even less about the player himself and more about the idiots attached.

all i literally care about this year is mitch's performance since we're going into a contract year for him. nothing he could possibly do would get people off his back but that, and somehow his points never seem to matter in the playoffs bc they're in games we're already winning ?? but yeah. the willy is our best playoff performer narrative makes me fucking laugh man........ like people will lower their standards and move their goalposts and do ANYTHING to make it seem like mitch is cancerous and the reason we keep losing and everyone else steps up when he doesn't and it's just a fucking lie. morgan is the only one with visible elevation in the playoffs imo, and . idk. maybe the way the team's structured rn and shifting players to different lines will work. maybe it won't. we won a round not doing it last year, so it's not like that's THE make or break thing and we haven't even seen this lineup play a single meaningful game in the last month fnlkdsjf or a singular playoff game so. it's all a LOT of big talk. at the end of the day.. if the leafs ever make it to the cup.. itll be 1634 passing it to each other and their names next to each other and that's all i want for them, honestly. leafs duo of all time regardless of the dumbasses the 23-24 season has emboldened.

[tauforged]

i genuinely want to study the brains of people on here who just reblog other users personal posts all willy nilly. like WHAT is compelling you, random online stranger, to wordlessly reblog a post in which i complain aimlessly about having to take my car into the shop and butting heads with my parents over where it should go. you don’t know me. i don’t know you. you aren’t adding a comment. you aren’t even saying anything in the tags. it’s really fucking annoying but also genuinely fascinating behavior. what are you gaining from this. please enlighten me

[fumblingmusings]

I am an absolute and utter fucking SUCKER for Scotland ×England sibling dynamics of older and younger sibling shenanigans

I love the idea of Scotland being the older brother who England can rely on. Whilst i believe the fandom mostly prefers Wales and England sibling dynamics bc the way Scotty is in the manga (he is a bit of a dick to England, which i believe stems from how the Scottish and English relationship actually is) , i believe Scotland is the one who looked after and raised England when they were wee babys, and is the one England inevitably runs to for just ab anything

(this can also be my unhealthy obsession with ScotEng but this isn't relevant to the ask so ignore it)

I loved all the moments England/Evelyn and her siblings had in SPE.

I wonder what they felt seeing their little sister slowly losing herself, constantly falling ill, if they worried she would slowly fade out of existence at one point or if conflicts between their governments made then cold towards her and anticipating the day she was gone.

What was their relationship as baby nations? You mentioned in your fic that Eva didn't remember her mother much, and what little she did, she believed her mother didn't want her at all. Does that mean Ali and Wales were in charge of raising England as a child? What was that like for them? At what point did they teach Eva what she was and what the would mean for her and them.

I hope your future fics could have more UK sibling moments, whether as nations or as humans, bc i love them deeply and i literally live for any uk sibling content.

In other words, where do i send you the monies for more England and their brothers sharing a single braincell. Bc the car scene had me dying

This answer is so long I'm sorry I completely rambled sorry sorry...

Scotland is a dick in the manga towards England partly because he deserves to be a dick towards England and partly because us Scots are the most contrarian annoying bastards on the planet where everything has to be a goddamn battle and it's genuinely exhausting because most English and Welsh people would let it go out of fear of being rude or confrontational but Scots just get a kick out of being the devil's advocate in the most inopportune times. This is partly England's fault and partly just a leftover from how stubborn the Highland-Lowland conflicts have been over the years. That Simpsons joke by grounds-keeper Willy?

They're right.

Anyway!

I love the idea of Scotland being the older brother who England can rely on. Whilst i believe the fandom mostly prefers Wales and England sibling dynamics bc the way Scotty is in the manga (he is a bit of a dick to England, which i believe stems from how the Scottish and English relationship actually is) , i believe Scotland is the one who looked after and raised England when they were wee babys, and is the one England inevitably runs to for just ab anything

I like the idea of England Scotland and Wales really only having each other for about a thousand years, with Ireland always keeping its distance where necessary. And those early memories don't go away easily, that human connection cannot be forgotten even after a hundred armies and a dozen dead Kings say they should.

A lot of the time, all they had was each other, when England was split in seven Scotland in four, and Wales in god knows how many tiny kingdoms. They were real wanderers. And no matter what they do to each other, they still can't get that first millennium out of their memories. Scotland is and was far more likely to intercede in English politics when requested by the government versus the other neighbours. Because we're nosey buggers who like burning York.

I go with Wales being the oldest (which I think is not a popular choice but... meh), then Ireland, then Scotland, then England, and then obviously wee Northern Ireland a thousand years later. I know Hima has the Irelands in a sort of two Italies situation where they were babies together, but I think that's the biggest piece of canon where I'm like... no. I can maybe accept him popping up during the late 16th century, but not prior to the 1000s like the other four.

I think in the fic I have the kids born around the time of Rome's arrival. But they aren't Rome's kids. I don't know... haven't thought it through entirely, but Britannia was never a particularly good mother by modern standards, even more so when it hit home that the children, but particularly England, signalled her death. Evie went from being her mother's little apple to a cuckoo bird. And Eva liked Rome, he was funny and made her smile and brought her nice things. Her mother didn't, clearly, and made her and Ireland watch the destruction of Colchester and St Alban's and London. Ireland was like ooft. alrighty. Then went on with her day. But England took it... poorly.

But when they lose their mum, they are still kids themselves. None of them are a day over twelve when Britannia dies, so they know what it's like to rely on fickle humans for protection only to realise they really can't stay too long with any of them. They raise each other for a while until they all go their separate ways. I mentioned in the fic that England was a clingy, weepy little girl. Honestly, her siblings, who were just kids themselves, couldn’t cope with her, and one by one, they decided to go and live with their own people.

I headcanon that England and Scotland were the last to split because the overlap of what's now Lothian, the Borders, Cumbria, and Northumberland were grey areas in ownership for such a long time. Edinburgh was after all technically English from 680 to 970, and in the 940s, Strathclyde stretched through Cumbria and into Yorkshire, so England and Scotland have always been overlapping with their people.

I loved all the moments England/Evelyn and her siblings had in SPE. I wonder what they felt seeing their little sister slowly losing herself, constantly falling ill, if they worried she would slowly fade out of existence at one point or if conflicts between their governments made then cold towards her and anticipating the day she was gone. What was their relationship as baby nations? You mentioned in your fic that Eva didn't remember her mother much, and what little she did, she believed her mother didn't want her at all. Does that mean Ali and Wales were in charge of raising England as a child? What was that like for them? At what point did they teach Eva what she was and what the would mean for her and them.

The UK siblings for me are interesting during the 16th to 19th centuries because they all lack control one way or another, and the way they try to take it back for themselves is toxic. Scotland and Wales throw themselves into the army and navy respectively, and England completely shuts herself away with stolen children. Like they just disconnect from their own people. The whole point of Slow Paced Envy was to write about dissonance. Dissonance between the character's actions, what came out of their mouths, what they thought and what they knew to be true. Everyone in that fic runs on contradictions that are either flat out toxic and dangerous or - at best - delusional. England isn't the only one in the fic like that. I hope I portrayed it well...

So England is their baby sister at the end of the day. And she is - to be blunt - such an anomaly. She's so much weaker, she's got far less fire in her, she's way more passive. Scotland loves to travel and see the world (and do all kinds of heinous or drunken things) - it's what he lives for. Wales loves to fight. England wants to have a wee farmstead with barn cats and her witch cauldron. Her brother's flip between resenting her and pitying her.

But she's still their baby sister. I think that colours their relationship with her more than if it were Arthur, who is just another boy, albeit the youngest. Again, I think gender messes with the dynamic. Ireland deliberately extricates herself from the 'oldest sister = caretaker' role, but England falls into the 'baby' role, definitely. Not spoiled particularly, but she does receive the most attention. From everyone. Not that it ever made her happy.

There was no chance of them being on equal footing with each other. Scotland wanted it to be him. It was his royal family after all the pulled them all together. He has the better temperament for power, is more book smart, is a better tactician etc etc... And yet it's all on baby sister who by the 17th century is addicted to Opium and probably has had TB for the past three hundred years. It's laughable. It's a joke. God is mocking them. Make it make sense.

It's that conflict of "I know my sibling and they personally would never lay a hand on me but their people will and sometimes I cannot look at my sibling without thinking about what their people have done in their name and I hate them for it."

That saying that makes its round on the internet: the love was there, it didn't change anything, but it was there. That's really how I understand Scotland Wales and England's relationship. Love cannot overcome, nor should it necessarily. But it's still there. And that's something.

I hope your future fics could have more UK sibling moments, whether as nations or as humans, bc i love them deeply and i literally live for any uk sibling content. In other words, where do i send you the monies for more England and their brothers sharing a single braincell. Bc the car scene had me dying

Ha! This ask was payment enough. I'm glad you enjoyed the car scene. The one bit of levity that entire fic had...

Thank you for the ask! I'm sorry this reply is so scattered and long but ah! It made me happy. Thank you!

[sleepymarmot]

Ocean's Eleven (2001) & Ocean's Twelve (2004)

Ocean's Eleven

This is basically the gold standard of modern masculine coolness, right?

I definitely saw this at some point, but that was so long ago that I remembered nothing of the specifics. I do remember Ocean’s Eight well enough to compare, though, and what I found out today is that Debbie wasn’t the only Ocean sibling to have a surprising amount of gay chemistry with their blond(e) right hand (wo)man. Good for all of them!

Danny/Tess made a valiant effort to keep up, but unfortunately, Tess’s entire character is the weakest part of the film. The story is male-centric to the extreme, and the only woman is a trophy for the protagonist to steal from the antagonist.

None of these people measure up in hotness to Cate Blanchett in Ocean’s Eight, but they did look nice. A special shout out to the bad guy, who suddenly acquired a dark brooding gothic demeanor when he realized his defeat.

Every review describes Ocean’s Eleven with adjectives such as “smooth”, “fun”, and “charming”, which is true, but in addition to that, an essential factor that makes it work as a “feel-good movie” for me is how non-violent it is, despite the hypermasculinity. The target of robbery is utterly unsympathetic, there’s little to no collateral damage, guns only enter the picture as a two second long fakeout. The viewers don’t have the reason to feel bad for anyone and can just bask in the good vibes. (Though personally, I still managed to get nervous a few times during the heist, even though I knew perfectly well that the job would end in success. I’m really not built for any kind of suspense, huh.) It’s extremely shallow, but instead of the common and annoying “pretends to be deep but fails” way, it’s shallow in the “our only goal is to make this as fun as possible” way, and that gets no objections from me.

Ocean's Twelve

I genuinely can’t tell if I’ve watched Ocean’s Twelve before in full or not. I remember the laser dancing sequence, and the Bruce Willis-Julia Roberts stuff feels familiar, but everything else feels totally new to my present self.

They Garak’d Brad Pitt so hard! Literally the first scene of the movie grabs the viewer by the shoulders and shouts “Oh you thought he seemed kinda gay? Here, look, he’s definitely attracted to women!” Also, God, Hollywood kissing close-ups are so obnoxious.

The thief/cop romance is not bad in theory, but felt forced in practice; now that Danny and Tess are back together, we need another obligatory white heterosexual will they/won’t they (that doubles as a no homo, see above). The “reveal” that the legendary thief who might or might not be dead, and the thief father who allegedly died around the same time, are in fact the same person, can be seen from miles away; the real surprise is that Isabel herself didn’t figure it out somehow.

Linus was only slightly annoying in the first one, but here he’s given prolonged scenes that are painfully awkward to watch. What was the point of making him the “immature SJW” if that didn’t even go anywhere?

Vincent Cassel is not as good of an antagonist as Andy García. Watching Terry Benedict threaten the crew at the beginning of the film was actually pretty fun, and the Night Fox just doesn’t have anything to be a worthy successor to that classic villain charisma.

Overall I have to say I was pretty bored. Perhaps it’s my fault for watching the second movie the day after the first, motivated more by curiosity than “I’m really missing the heist movie vibe right now”. Several times I thought “this can’t possibly be the real heist, it’s not good enough”. The final twist was decent if a bit predictable, but it wasn’t enough to justify the whole thing.

I considered completing the marathon with Ocean’s Thirteen (which I have no memory of, either), but perhaps it would be wise to leave it for later. I suspect movies like these work better as palate cleansers or light entertainment, and trying to be completionist with them like with typical series would be counterproductive. For now, it might be better to take a break from action movies starring white American men — I feel testosterone-poisoned already!

[zerolostwalks]

Kissing prompt 19 for Lalex and/or #12 for Willie/Reggie please!

Alex isn’t sure how he kept getting talked into attending these parties. They always ended up going the same way for him. Attempting to socialize, or more accurately getting dragged along by his more extroverted friends as they socialized, until he could find a decent corner, dog, or bookshelf to hide behind or with. Occasionally Julie or Bobby would tag along and they could commiserate their misery together. However Julie had a final to study for and Bobby couldn’t(didn’t want to) get out of his shift at work. 

This party was especially shitty as he’d lost track of the rest of his friends fairly quickly. Flynn and Carrie would occasionally show up to dance in the living room where he sat, people watching. The last he saw of Willie and Reggie they were causing havoc by the drinks. From what Alex’s gathered they had attempted to bartend while neither knew the first thing about mixing drinks. And Luke, who knew where Luke ever disappeared to at any of these things.

“Hey hot stuff.” 

Speak of the devil. Luke flopped into Alex’s lap seemingly from out of nowhere, arms almost immediately wrapping around his shoulders. “What’cha up to?”

Alex adjusted his position as best as he could without knocking the beaming Luke from his spot. The weight of his friend rather calming. Luke’s fingers found their way into the back of Alex’s hair, fidgety as always. 

“Wondering what kind of chaos Reg and Willie are causing.” Alex answered.

Luke snorted. “No need to worry there. I saw them making out near the pantry.” 

Alex’s lip twitched in that way they always did when he wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh at or be annoyed with a situation. Of course that’s where they’d vanished too, the same place they disappeared to every other party. 

“Feeling left out?” Luke leaned in, voice managing to somehow straddle the line between teasing and genuine concern. Alex honestly couldn’t articulate an answer to that one, not entirely sure where Luke’s question was heading. Honestly he was happy Willie and Reggie were enjoying themselves, and he was feeling better and less bitter with Luke here in his lap. 

“I’m fine.” Is the answer Alex eventually landed on, smiling as he admired the ways Luke’s ever changing eyes shifted in the dim lights. 

Somehow the two of them slowly leaned closer to each other. Only realizing they had been getting closer when lips connected, soft, unhurried. 

“Wait.” Luke suddenly pulled back, brows climbing up his forehead. “Do you want to do this?”

Alex swallowed his laugh, pulling Luke back towards him by the front of his shirt. His other hand found its way to the back of his neck, the other boy was wearing one of his silly beanies today so his hair was harder to get to. Alex pulled Luke’s lower lip between his teeth just long enough to elicit a very interested groan out of him. 

Luke looked utterly betrayed when Alex pulled back then. He didn’t stay very away for long, resting their foreheads together so Luke could hear his very pointed whisper. “I’d rather do this at home.”

Luke swallowed hard, stumbling to the floor in his haste to stand up. “Home, yes. Sounds good.” The guitarist fumbled his phone around, no doubt attempting to text the others to let them know. Alex was already working on his own message as Luke’s typing was barely better than his handwriting when his mind wasn’t distracted.

It was a small miracle Luke didn’t combust in the short wait it took to get replies and the go ahead to go from their friends. Maybe Alex could afford to go to a few more parties if it meant getting Luke this riled up. 

[hectormcfilm]

WONKA

When this film was first rumoured years ago I can't say I expected much and even as the film crept closer to its release date I had some excitement but still low expectations. The trailers look fun enough but I wasn't really convinced with Timothe Chalamet's performance and despite having some faith due to the director being known for both Paddington films I went in with lots of scepticism. The modern landscape of Hollywood has made me very pessimistic towards prequels and especially ones that feel unnecessary and like quick cash grabs merely using a famous brand.

HOWEVER... Despite all my trepidation I left the cinema kind of loving this film. Before delving deeper I want to straight away express that this is one of the most magical and captivating films I have seen in years. I was so engaged and for someone usually very critical I found myself just having too much wholesome fun to find issues.

One aspects of this film I adore is the worldbuilding, this is a world filled with magic and absurdity and everything is accepted as normality, allowing certain weird moments or contrivances to feel almost natural. The chocolate cartel, the floating chocolate, Oompa Loompas this is a world of pure whimsy and absurdity.

To get my few negatives out of the way, the opening act was definitely the weakest in my opinion, I thought the opening 15 minutes or so was quite rushed and predicable but with some still great character moments. I also believe there could've been a few less characters as some of them fade into the background like the actor who is more annoying then anything.

I genuinely has no idea this film was going to be a full on musical, it was a surprise to be sure but a welcome one. The music is consistently great and fun throughout, songs like scrub scrub feeling like a classic Annie song. There are multiple songs taken from the original but they are all altered and feel unique, giving them their own identity. Overall this film never felt like it was relying on nostalgia or pandering to fan service, it stands alone very well. Even with multiple great songs like Scrub Scrub, pure Imagination the standout song for me was For A Moment. The scene with this song was when I think I fell in love with this film. Noodle and Wonka are milking a giraffe to get the milk for his chocolate when Noodle begins to sing about how this is the first time she's felt happy in so long whilst Wonka sings any word he can think of that rhymes with noodle, it is very cute and exemplifies Willy's kind hearted wholesome nature. Then as they run off with the milk Willy grab a bunch of balloons and they begin dancing and floating through the skies, bouncing from building to building as flamingos fly overhead, its pure magic. The choreography lends to the songs greatly, each dance scene feels dynamic and full of life, this is helped by the amazing lighting and colour grading throughout making everything feel colourful and lively.

The main worry I had with this film I need to address is Timothe Chalamet as the lead. Now after watching the film I have to admit I firmly believe Chalamet is the best Willy Wonka, better than not just Johnny Depp but also Gene Wilder. I know this is controversial but I completely believe this. Chalamet perfectly captures the magic and childish energy of Wonka, his love for chocolate making and his overall kind-hearted and selfless nature is honestly inspiring and so satisfying to watch, making him such an engaging protagonist and very easily loveable. I really appreciate the subtleties of Chalamet's performance as well, Wonka is young and mostly fun and loveable but there are moments of madness, seconds where he might stare for too long or make a strange comment and these glimpses of insanity are perfect. This version of Wonka feels like a natural younger version of say the Gene Wilder version, I could see this Wonka delving into his madness and obsession as he leaves his friends behind to focus purely on chocolate making and inventing. This Wonka also has a large focus on his actual chocolate making and inventing abilities, in certain moments it can feel like he is an almost super powered genius but I enjoy how he is so smart with invention yet is illiterate, it create a nice message about how everyone has their own skills. Actually this film has a great focus on how every character has strengths and weaknesses but we are always stronger working together and helping one another, its a great message for the younger children the film is targeted at.

I was shocked at the cast and the amount of great British comedians in it. There were 4 Peep show Alumni, Olivia Coleman, Alan Johnson, Simon and Dobby which was great to see (Peep show being my favourite comedy of all time) as well as there being multiple horrible histories starts and even more British comedians like Phil Wang and Matt Lucas. This great cast adds to how genuinely funny this film can be. Similar to Paddington this film has a great emotional core, Wonka's connection to his mother leads to multiple emotional moments as well as Noodle's mistreatment and desire for a family.

Wonka is a magical, inspirational, imaginative gem with a sweet hint of madness.

[jostenneil]

Do you mind elaborating on what you dislike about Winick’s writing?

it’s a couple of different things, but where i think it stems from is the idea that some jason fans have of jason being turned into “the angry robin” as only a recent development, and that winick returning to the writer’s mantle would fix that issue, as if he didn’t ascribe to this version of jason in his own writing of under the red hood, and that influenced so many of the versions of jason thereafter. as much as i hate starlin and what he ultimately did to jason, i think there’s a distinction that has to be made about his writing. he didn’t think jason was a generally angry kid. in quite a few of his stories, jason is bright, nervous, insightful. he’s still very much a good kid. the central aspect to his writing of jason and how that eventually leads to a death in the family is his depiction of jason as reckless due to emotional involvement or naïveté, sometimes both (as can be seen in the case with sheila). and while that’s a bit annoying given the earlier issues collins wrote, where jason was capable of exercising restraint and patience, the part about him getting too emotionally involved at times is at least not all that far fetched given the issue where he learns two-face is responsible for killing his father. but that’s about as far as the portrayal goes, and even in aditf (which is immediately subsequent to the garzonas issues, the content of which obv deeply upset jason and that he also got emotionally involved in), the concern from bruce is that jason hasn’t had enough time to properly cope with his parents’ death, and that if bruce can help him then maybe he’ll be able to patrol normally. there’s never the idea that jason’s some angry kid with a mean streak, and while the thing about his “mean streak” is only a single throwaway line in under the red hood as a whole, i think it exposes the problem with winick and jason writers in general. they don’t want to acknowledge the fact that his issues pre-death were specific. he wasn’t hurling himself like an infuriated ballistic at every criminal. truly there were only two cases where that happened, and one involved his father’s murderer, obv a sore point, and the other a woman who hanged herself bc she couldn’t escape her rapist. (ig if you wanted you could also count him going overkill on the drug bust at the start of aditf, but that was the kind of temporary mental place starlin was leading jason to with the garzonas issues, rather than something that necessarily spoke on his character as a whole.) ascribing all of that to him having a mean streak and not just. . . the fact that he was a deeply empathetic person who was upset by these things that happened to good people is kind of bizarre to me. and yeah, i know winick writes jason killing people who harm children, but it’s the way he goes about writing jason’s attitude that bothers me bc it feels purely driven by rage as if jason’s feelings about certain criminals didn’t stem from a deep compassion for and personal connection to their victims. when you center so much of jason’s post-resurrection motivation around the joker and little else, you forget what drove jason to get emotionally involved with cases to begin with. more than self righteousness about what criminals deserved, it was compassion, and i think winick really missed the mark on that.

on another end, i also think ignoring the case with his father specifically has spelled a kind of disaster for his character. jason’s father worked as a lackey for one of gotham’s biggest crime bosses, and jason initially thought he’d been abandoned by willis until he learned two-face killed him. i think it’s crazy that his philosophy regarding who deserves to die and who doesn’t wouldn’t account for that deeply personal experience, esp since he loved his father. that’s not to say that every person he’s ever killed is suddenly in possession of a conscience and that every head, lackey, etc. was as sincere of intentions as his father was, but i think what winick’s vision lacks is the idea of jason having to contend with difficult questions. what is the definition of “bad”? how do you get to decide who lives or dies? what marks the point of no return for a criminal? it’s that lack of specificity that to me has harmed the character as a whole, not bc i think drug lords and rapists don’t deserve the absolute worst, but bc i think jason should come across situations where he’s forced to ask himself what gives him the right to play god, esp since a part of his philosophy is that he’s unperturbed with killing people who get in the way of him exacting what he calls justice (also this is not to say i agree with how urban legends handled this; while i enjoyed the premise i think the execution was lacking). people like to say there is a lot of nuance to jason’s introduction as the red hood but i don’t really think there is. the film version of the comic marginally improves on things but it’s still far from a genuine analysis on crime or the question of what criminals deserve what punishment, and how one would actually decide on that or on their right to decide to begin with

ultimately, i just don’t see how people believe subsequent writers are what drove jason to end up as the resident batfam psycho by the end of preboot, or as the angry robin in more recent years, when i very much think it’s a direct consequence of winick’s writing. so long as people hold that writing on a pedestal devoid of any criticism whatsoever, jason’s never going to improve as a character, and i’m still going to be of the belief he hasn’t been written well since before he died

[radioactivebowtie]

Okay! But Finn and Alpha-Beta could have a beautiful dynamic that just needs to be explored. RIGHT. NOW.

Warnings: I don’t think anything genuinely? Just the ramblings of me.

I do mention Willie! Go follow @outismisc because they made him, and I love them sm and that will probably be a better way to explain both Willie himself and his relationship with AB lmao.

OK, So I have had this thought for a while man. I think that their relationship could go in two ways. 

- AB could absolutely hate them and think they are super fucking annoying.

OR

- AB could tolerate them. He could think they are a little bit interesting, and they could just have some good banter!

So okay,,, AB would have known about Finn since he has started watching the cameras to try and get out. I think that it would be really funny if he saw them as a fellow camera watcher. Like Finn doesn’t know that he’s there Finn is just like-

“Lmao it’s kinda silly that there is a camera in my room when I’m the only one watching cameras lol”

AND LET ME TELL YOU I HAVE HAD IT WRITTEN FOR MY SONA SINCE THE BEGINNING! Finn? Nosy as fuck, when I wrote that BIO for my sona’s reference? It was supposed to be little notes that someone like Reagan had taken when looking into the pros and cons.

WHEN I SAID NOSEY IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE COMING FROM SOMEONE WHO HAD EXPERIENCE WITH THEM BEING NOSEY AS FUCK!

It would be known that when Finn watches the cameras they take it seriously. Like, they still fuck around just like everyone else in the company.

(We love the headcanon that Finn makes “Cognito’s Funniest Work Videos” or that they could absolutely be bribed to make a blackmail tape for someone if you give them just enough sugary shit on a good day.)

But all that being said? They like knowing what’s going on, and sadly there is a specific room inside Cognito that they don’t get to see from their desk.

Reagan’s Restricted Room.

Like okay, they try for sure. I think at the beginning I can see it being somewhat amusing to watch for AB. Like he isn’t going to mention it to Reagan, not without thinking through how it might go at least. But he enjoys watching them trying to break in and being thwarted, or bugging and wearing Reagan down time after time. It’s like a game of mousetrap! And if they win he has a chance to get out!

They try asking around when they realize that Reagan isn’t going to break. 

The puppy dog eyes and begging may work on JR, but they don’t work on Reagan. Tragic honestly.

They start with Brett. He immediately starts stuttering and being nervous. Man looks like he is ready to VOMIT. But they back out when they see how anxious he is, they understand that feeling. He says no when they give him the chance but pats them on the back and gives them a misguided but appreciated little, “I’m sure you’ll find somebody!”

Next target? Willie. They find him wandering the halls of one of the basement sub-levels. They see him, and they go into a full-on sprint toward him. They scare the ever-loving crap out of this man. When Finn asks if Willie knows some secret way to get into Reagan’s secret room, he starts sweating. And now HE IS ALSO STAMMERING! (Not to say that isn’t a normal occurrence with Willie when Finn scares the absolute shit out of them by just popping out at random but FINN CAN TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SPOOKED WILLIE AND ANXIOUSLY HIDING SOMETHING WILLIE!!!) Unfortunately for Finn Willie is loyal to his Robo-boyfriend and won’t give him away. And luckily for Willie Finn doesn’t feel like pressuring Willie until he breaks so he slinks away down another hall to escape.

It for sure happens eventually, but here we are! Finn finally gets to see inside the room. Reagan trusts Finn, and they may not be able to put a camera in there, but they do get to meet THE MAN. THE MYTH. THE LEGEND. 

He tries spooking them with the old, “You must be Finn, I’ve seen you around the building-” schtick but honestly. It doesn’t bother Finn at all.

Reagan is there to supervise and when Finn straight up ignores him to turn and yell out to her instead she snickers a little.

“YOU HID THE KILLER ROBOT YOU MADE INSIDE OF THE SUB, SUB, SUB-BASEMENT?! HOLY SHIT REAGAN! THAT’S SO HARDCORE AND SWEET?!”

Finn has a fucking field day. If they only get to be in here once- (They will absolutely try and bribe Kate from the cloning department to give them some Reagan DNA to get them in again but that is a topic for another time) 

They ask him all sorts of questions. I mean the only other time they had seen AB was when he was still going to replace the president and tried to kill... well everyone? But Reagan says he’s changed, even if it was just a little (and they would trust Reagan with their life honestly-) so if Reagan says they can trust him with some caution? Finn can do just that.

Finn asks what he’s been doing down here. He mumbles something about friends? and Joey Tribbiani? Finn never watched friends, but they think that’s what he is talking about. When Finn turns around and gives Reagan a look she shrugs letting out a little “What? He likes it!”

Finn shakes their head and turns back around, other than the show friends they talk about the other thing he’s gotten to know. NICHE THINGS THAT HAPPEN WITH THE PEOPLE IN COGNITO.

Honestly, if you need any tea from someone within the company you should go to one of these two. They could sit for hours and talk about the smallest details that they have seen. Like down to how many times someone has walked down a single hallway in one day.

AB is kind of shook that they can sort of keep up with him. Like clearly they can’t follow everything he says, they aren’t some kind of science genius like Reagan is but they do seem to be able to remember things that some would see as unimportant. They are good at reading people and seeing body language even through a monitor. They even had the gal to correct him???

Reagan is honestly too busy for this shit, she has let the two of them become friends and even if AB acts like he is super annoyed and would rather be anywhere else! Reagan can tell that he is having fun.

Whether it’s because he has someone else to talk to other than Reagan or because he is enjoying having someone who enjoys people watching and honestly probably roasting most of the staff at Cognito? It’s still highly up for debate!

But either way? Finn is back to begging Reagan to let them back in the next day, and honestly? Reagan doesn’t know if she wants to say no this time.

[unassumingpebble]

ESC 2022 Semifinal 2 recap:

(if you see me reusing my jokes for the final no you didn't) and once again also just a general warning for mean gay bitchy judging ahead, this is my one time a year that im mean it's like lent or smth, you have been warned. if you're not into bitchy shady opinions then uuuhhh i recommend reading something else for your own peace of mind tbh.

skits at esc still are so painful dear god opening: well that's 5 minutes of my life i'm never getting back laura's biceps HELLO???? and this look?? FAB!! the ruffles! the wet hair look!!!! the deep lip!! officially obsessed mika has now decided to be a LEMON realtor popsicle, go off i guess the presenters giving licorice rasperry lemon fantasy. or the flag of germany, i guess? if it's not in the right order don't bother me i can't read the fucking clock correctly it's nothing personnel

Finland - what the fuck is this yellow IT moment??  i either end up super biased for finland or holding them to a higher standard and this time uuuuhh i expected better. also i don't think a song about a toxic woman who clearly isn't good for you is particularly feminist (idk if they claimed it was or if it's just my announcer but???? nor using a kind of degrading word in that context? so that's kinda weird) also i'm curious to see if the board is unhappy with this one bc i heard that they had issues with albania and latvia ( :// ) and while i obviously don't want any numbers punished or censored but i'm expecting an annoying double standard tbh where showing skin and suggestive text is fine if you're a man or doing it through a male perspective, i guess :/

Serbia - i wish i could understand the text so i could know what's happening but i also appreciate the non-english. it seems so interesting and fascinating, generally im confused but interested and intrigued, ART. genuinely so into this

Azerbaijan - i really do like his voice and his beard is very pretty. and i do really like this song tbh, it gets the ballad pass although it's just barely not quite engaging enough for eurovision imo. a fantastic vocal performance tho that sounds genuinely sincere and a good song.

Georgia - i fucking love this, ngl. the looks, the sound, the aesthetic. love how odd it sounds. totally a dnd party vibes. we've got officer druid, punk pirate man, glam goth plague doctor, and steampunk willy wonka. this is a psychadelic mess and i'm living

Malta - ig model? doing a power ballad? groundbreaking. *insert miranda presley*

San Marino - love the cowboy hat moment. the song is absolute ass. i do respect rhyming cowboy with sex toy i suppose. bit hypocritical for me to say this and obvs måneskin doesn't own rock gender fuckery (hello, have you SEEN rock?) and it could just be being yourself and trying to piggyback for that purpose but it feels just. a little too derivative maybe. but like a soft derivative, i don't think it's anything worth making some hubbub about

Australia - okay ART. the met gala could NEVER. it's personal, it's honest, it's art, it's fashion, it's vocals, it's real, it gets a ballad pass any fucking day from me. i'm THROWING ballad passes. legit love it genuinely love everything, it's art, it's fantastic, and i fucking love that the song's about his experiences as an autisic person, bc relate. one of my favs now

Cyprus - okay art reference, go off venus! kinda love it with the stage fountains. obviously not the most over-the-top energetic but i appreciate that, still very full of life and a bop with a more lowkey energy, a whole moment tbh. lovely vocals

Ireland - esc back at it again with the pop a whole decade too dated.

North Macedonia - i legit forgot a number was on

Estonia - i usually say that i'm into folk music but not country because country's sound is just too polished and that won't be changing today

Romania - started with what might be the gayest interpretive cow milking in history, which might not seem as a particularly spectacular achievement but with all the farming in stage musicals, it is fairly impressive. i was going to say that i was into the cutout jumpsuits but the pattern is truly horrendous.

Poland - we have now arrived at my least favourite esc genre, which is man in suit on empty stage with a single spotlight and the singer's moody face agressively imposed in the background. just agressive crooning, endless belting, and high notes. not even being about water can save this song for me, which says a lot because i am a complete sucker for water songs.

Montenegro - poor girl got impaled by an umbrella, no wonder she's in pain

Belgium - i mean it's fine. he's clearly a good singer. i wouldn't be mad if it moved on, but i also don't really care if it doesn't

Sweden - i know it's moving on but i fully cannot stand it. it's trying so hard to be robyn. but no one will ever be robyn.

Czech Republic - i'm not mad at it tbh. like her look and the vaporwave inspired background. slightly less dated than a lot of other eurovision pop, giving kinda 2018. I do appreciate the man with the bow on the electric guitar

the world always needs more Mika, i've been saying this for years. also laura looks stunning it's giving decadent vampire retiring for the evening posed casually on top of a decadent staircase. I do think these kinds of songs might not be what her voice needs though, it's very strong and clear and clearly needs a bit more circumstance and force, unfortunately. Mika is giving the exact same suit but now as a polar bear realtor that fell into a strawberry patch. he really saw that suit on the clearance rack and said yeah i'll take at least three of it, thanks

I Do Not Care about these men in leather suits. a sentence i never thought i would say but here we are, i suppose

Laura serving an even more dimitrescu-esque look i love

Spain - yeah it's a dance song. you can do a lil shimmy. don't super care. for being as energetic as it is it feels weirdly lethargic

UK - well we've got a camp stage, i am stealing his jumpsuit.

Germany - looking forward to another german bottom placement, this is tanking for sure.

Voting thoths: "We have a valid result" yeah we'll see about that buddy

my literal reaction to belgium's qualification was 'who the fuck is belgium' LMAOO azerbaijan may not be the most eurovision but it might be one of the actual best songs this year POLAND????? finland?? finland gets a spot but latvia didn't????? RIGGORY.. thamkg god australia made it because i would have rioted ugh serbia is art and im happy to see it here, so deserved!!! very sad about georgia. was kinda expecting it, but i'm still upset. i am def checking out their other stuff after this tho.

For sure rooting for australia this year! <333 This one was less of a tragedy so i won't have too much trouble falling asleep tonight, even if a lot of things moved on that certainly did not catch my attention at all.

[outlander-babes]

Drums of Autumn thoughts*

*y’all know the drill

Jamie being there for his friends hanging is heartbreaking yall

Claire being absolutely terrified of Rollo is what I call consistent writing

Have I mentioned how much I love Duncan Innes?

Gayle is hysterical oh my god

Roger screaming “Tulach Ard” is everything I didn’t know I needed

Omg he told her what the Frasers would say so she could be a part of it if she wanted I’m going to cry

Joe threatening to beat the shit outta Roger is so funny

WHY ARE YALL MAKING SEXY PASSES AT EACH OTHER IN JOES LIVING ROOM STOP IT GET SOME HELP

Young Ian: I don’t know Greek

Jamie: oh my god he doesn’t even know Greek

Steven Bonnet sucks ass but then we could have guessed that

Stan Jocasta Cameron

Ah yes the age old American sport of antagonizing people and then lynching them when they fight back

Philip Wylie get kicked in the balls challenge

Am I a little bit in love with Mr John Quincy Mayers? Yes.

I’ll bet y’all $80 right now that that soldier guy murdered that poor girl

Pollyanne seems very nice I like her

Hey now Claire and Jamie are 2 for 2 they both killed a deadly wild animal!

Jamie making friends with natives and immediately trying to learn a bit of their language is very cute

Henceforth I propose as a nickname we call Jamie “strawberry”

If you think Roger MacKenzie is bad because he was upset Brianna rejected his marriage proposal you need to leave my blog

Also Brianna sweetie please go to therapy

Duncan Innes is my sweet boy and you can pry him from my cold dead hands

I love that we’re getting more into the magic/fantasy aspects of the story

Claire finally figure out you aren’t just a time traveler challenge

Every time she describes what happens when she heals someone I’m like “babes that shit isn’t normal that’s some Master Raymond type shit”

Roger I love and cherish you but sometimes you don’t make good decisions

CLAIRE WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT MAGIC WHAT DID I SAY THATS A FUCKING GHOST

Duncan Innes that’s it that’s the thought

I think Brianna should go to therapy

Rollo is goodest boy and Ian being so proud of him is so cute

Haha Jamie’s an old man (who can somehow still get some even with a busted back and a minor case of hypothermia)

God I’m in love with Young Ian

WILLIE THE BOY IS BACK

Nayawenne deserved better at that’s just facts

Young Ian and Willie are the duo I never knew I needed

Can Lord John PLEASE move on. It’s been over 10 years he doesn’t love you in fact the very thought of you being attracted to him makes him violently uncomfortable and thus makes me uncomfortable MOVE THE FUCK ON JESUS CHRIST

I love John and think he’s great but literally this is unhealthy and he’s starting to annoy the fuck outta me

Anyway

Jamie telling Willie that he loves his son but being unable to tell him that HE is the son is SO SAD

I hope the natives reach their new home safe

BRIANNA GO TO THERAPY

Geillis is ✨awful✨

JOE KNOOOOOOOWS

Fiona? Do you mean...baby?

Ian Murray is in fact one of the loves of my life

Roger accidentally screwing up because he wanted to meet his dad is both sad and amusing

Fiona dousing him in coffee when he shows up on fire? Queen shit.

Brianna punch Laoghaire in the face challenge

Lizzie’s so cute omg I’m in love with her

Hell yeah Roger save your great grandfather!

Steven Bonnet is the Worst™️

Oh Lizzie my sweet summer child

Was Roger in the wrong? Yes. Did he have valid reasons? Also yes.

No Roger hate in this household

Bree and Jamie are so cute

I find if fascinating that Lizzie remembered Roger was going by MacKenzie but Brianna who was also there is like ✨Roger Wakefield✨

Lizzie is baby and I understand where she was coming from but DAMNIT LIZZIE

Jamie my love you make some fucking stupid decisions sometimes

Kinda overshadowed by my worry for Roger is that the prose about Brianna attempting to overcome her trauma is BEAUTIFUL

Let Claire bitchslap her husband when he lets his 1700’s misogyny get the better of him

Listen I love Jamie but there are times where I genuinely wanna rock his shit

Brianna and Roger pining and trying to get back to each other is so sweet 🥺

Poor Roger he’s going through it

Why did Ulysses’ story make me cry??

Pére Alexandere deserves better!

Brianna and John are the power couple of the century

Roger is not doing good

Why does Jamie hate Roger so much ugh

OK YALL IS THE FUCKING “LOOKING OUT FOR NUMBER ONE” RANT IVE HEARD SO MUCH ABOUT ONLY IN THE SHOW BECAUSE I HAVE NOT SEEN HIDE NOR HAIR OF MY SWEET BOYS SUPPOSED MISOGYNY

He named the baby Alexandra excuse me while I cry

John and Brianna’s friendship is SO CUTE I LOVE THEM

Why do the show runners do this??? Why did they make my poor boy a misogynist??

If you don’t like Roger you’re wrong

Jamie being a grandpa that’s it that’s the thought

ROGER AND BRIANNA HAVE MY WHOLE HEAR OH MY GOD

They’re calling the baby Gizmo and I...

DUNCAN INNES MY MAIN MAN!!!

Ugh I love Roger learning about his family

Someone for the love of god PLEASE coldcock Frank

“Go tell them the Mackenzies are here” YALL WATCH ME SOB

[adultswim2021]

Minoriteam #20: “Behold Balactus! Part II: The Blackening” | July 24, 2006 – 12:00AM | S01E20

Did I already use that image for part one? I don’t even fucking care anymore. I just want to be done.

Well, I've done it: I've watched every episode of Minoriteam. And what do I have to show for it? This is unquestionably the worst show Adult Swim has ever aired. At the very least, it's the worst show Adult Swim has ever aired up to this point. Not sure how close we'll get to this sort of bottom again. I'll find out, I guess.

I didn't really talk about the first part, because I feel zero guilt being dismissive of this shitty show. But I DID watch it. I was just short on time that night and decided to do a big Mail Bag post instead, basically. Because this was a two-parter and also because my ability to retain anything that happens in this show, I did the unthinkable: I REWATCHED the first part just so I could “get” the second part. So here's what happens:

The White Shadow organization unleashes Balactus on Earth, he's like Galctus but black. He’s a destroyer of worlds. The bad guys seem to be under the impression that he'll just go after other black people because of “black on black crime”. When he starts destroying things willy-nilly and mysteriously starts collecting random items (turns out they're for a doomsday device), they eventually team up with the Minoriteam and other characters from the series storied past in order to correct their mistake and save Earth.

Meanwhile, Fasto learns his father is actually a space man, sorta like Superman’s origin. He goes back in time and learns Balactus' real name and I guess that's enough to make him go away? Because it's like, Jewy sounding or something? Leslie Ira something? Is this a joke I don't get or what? Or is it yet another case of an Adam De La Pena project marked by a case of “well we wrote what technically can be called 'comedy', time to go home!”

MAIL BAG

From KON!

In honor of Minoriteam’s death, I’d like to reiterate how pissed I am that AS deleted the show in the wake of the George Floyd protests, giving the show cover that it, like other shows deleted in the Fey Doctrine, was simply of a different time and just insensitive to current cultural mores. It obscures the fact that the show does and always did suck shit. It MUST be made clear that Minoriteam was just as awful at the slur-friendliest heydays of the George Jr era as it is today.

Thank you for saying this KON, because I 100% agree with it. Also: A video popped up on YouTube TODAY, on the day I literally finished the show. I uses that annoying modern YouTube reviewer style that grates on me, but it also SEVERELY soft-pedals on how bad the writing on this show truly is. Like, yes, in an ideal world, the show would be allowed to stay on Adult Swim's website forever, and there'd be generations of people who can click on it, find it unfunny, and abandon it until the end of time.

The aforementioned YouTube video seems to be saying that Adam De La Pena's heart was in the right place because he did make the villains of the show be stand-ins for systemic problems that keep society racist. And I agree with that, I guess? But that doesn't change the fact that De La Pena's writing blows, and this show sucks. It reminds me of listening to people defend the Star Wars prequels by saying they're operatic and deal with deep themes and point to respectable literary references as a parallel to it’s various supposed virtues. But this doesn't change the fact that when they thing plays in front of you it just lays there like a turd. Please don’t get me started on the Star Wars prequels. I’m not even particularly a Star Wars fan, so I don’t really care about how bad they are except for I genuinely believe that people who defend them, EVEN lightly, are suffering from severe mental illness.

Now, I'm off to write my Minoriteam fan fiction, where the White Shadow organization has it's own show removed from streaming in order to make Black Lives Matter protesters look bad, but nobody actually cares.