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#and when i do have the ability to binge i just dont have the room for it anymore
affectionatemud · 1 year
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TW: food insecurity
its crazy being broke and experiencing grocery day because usually these days i have half a meal or a whole meal a day and im good. but today is grocery day so i decided to treat myself and had both breakfast and dinner and i feel like ive eaten an entire buffet
tw for tags: diet culture? kinda. more food insecurity. slight discussion of past (and maybe a little current) ed
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cuppalevi · 4 months
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𝐓𝐨𝐝𝐚𝐲'𝐬 𝐂𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐚 # 𝟔 | 𝐋𝐞𝐯𝐢
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Today's Cuppa is cuppalevi's feature fanfic recommendations. See Cuppa Collections for list of fanfic recommendations.
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june 09 2024
aside from this is a story of the sea by shinzouing this one easily made it to my top fave eruri x reader fics. ok, tbh, its just two lovers and this is a story of the sea that's on there but ykwim.
the gist is; levi and erwin already have an established relationship and erwin wanted to bring a woman into the mix. well we can pretty much guess who that is!
i recently reread this fic, actually— binged read it because i could not put my phone down. i came across this when i was looking for eruri x reader fanfics and i quite liked the premise so i decided why not. i was in for a ride.
i love the way feelingthorny portrays levi and erwin's personalities through their decisions and actions throughout the stories. especially in times of insecurity, self-doubt, and emotions. seeing the two of them and the reader come to terms with their feelings felt like someone dipped through my chest and squeezed at my heart.
to see how far they've come from the beginning up to the current chapter, their prior struggles were alleviated through helping one another learn about themselves and also JUST SOLID COMMUNICATION MAN.
and levi squad (god i miss them so much) very much felt like found family. they're all so tightly knitted and devoted to each other im crying.
dont get me started on the dialogue and the inner character thoughts. feelingthorny's flow of delivering the story, the characters, the actions— were oozing with descriptive devices akin to specific character traits as well as the environment.
personally, i also loved that reader in this fic, is a visual artist. the ability to draw brings such an importance to the kind of world they're living in, where anybody who is in the military can be gone in a blink of an eye. the talent to keep images of people in paper, is one ive always admired, being surrounded by friends who are visual artists as well.
amazing read for those eruri fans like myself who also wants to be sandwiched between the commander and the captain. is looking for yearning the kate and anthony kind, the steamy sex, and above all, the delight of discovering more of yourself through the companionship of others.
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Kind: Series Content: canonverse, polyamory, throuple, romance, pining, bisexual characters, pining, smut, threesome, see more on ao3 Status: Ongoing
𝙏𝙬𝙤 𝙇𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨 by feelingthorny
It seems unreal when your Commander and your Captain suggest their bed might have room for another, but when the acts that were meant to be purely physical start to heal old wounds, the three of you wonder how any of you were surviving this whole time without the other two at your side.
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©cuppalevi on tumblr / icon by yomu DO NOT STEAL / header by me
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psychicbergara · 3 years
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This is completely unrelated to anything I’ve ever sent but I love your user name cuz before I even got into the fandom I was binging the episodes and I genuinely loved the idea that maybe Ryan does actually have ‘the vision’. Think of how funny it would be for Ryan to genuinely sense ghost/bad vibes but the ghosts don’t do anything cuz they literally can’t/don’t have the power. And since I love the spiderverse aus how cool would it be if he did have a ghost sense like how miles has electricity that the other spiderppl don’t have
ANONNNNN,,,,
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we are the SAME!!! you've completely read my mind, ive wanted to talk about this for forever like listen,,, LISTEN
i came up with this username because i am absolutely obsessed with the concept of ryan having 'the vision' or being psychic because there are literally so many moments where ryan is like 'oh i dont like the vibes of this room', 'it feels weird in here', or when he does actually see or hear something, absolutely no one else does!! i fell in love with this idea ever since that voodoo unsolved episode where ryan says he sees a little girl and the psychic confirmed it (she could be lying obviously) but the point is that ryan doesn't like making up any type of evidence, so when he said that, he genuinely meant it
i also watched that winchester house investigation where ryan and jake went by themselves and let me tell you anon,,, ryan was hearing things, feelings things that no one else was hearing (except for the footsteps and the whistling obviously) LIKE!!!! im not saying ryan actually DOES have the vision (he might have a weak version of it who knows hehe) but the concept is so so good that im kinda shocked no one else has made tons of fics based on this. like the potential is there,, like ryan unlocking his true potential with his abilities but not telling shane because shane won't believe him and would think he absolutely lost it... and in turn, it makes them more distant with each other and shane notices something happening with ryan but doesn't know what to do about it. LIKE ITS SO GOOD!!!
i also remember someone told me that shane said as an offhand joke, i think, that ryan may have some kind of psychic abilities and ryan was like 'ha absolutely not.' and that switch in their skeptic/believer dynamic just made me go a bit insane lsdkgjffg
AND THE SPIDEY SENSES YESSSS i was absolutely thinking about that too but i totally forgot to put it in my posts LIKE his psychic abilities as his extra spidey powers HITS SO HARD!! anon,, i could talk about this ALL DAY god you've unleashed something in me that i've wanted to talk about for so long and I THANK YOU FOR IT :D
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Clark Kent imagine
Author note: I cannot remeber writing this..and since i haven’t wrote anything for a while. I figure hey why not!!!!! So Sorry if it doesn’t make sense LOL 😂😂 I will be posting more soon promise.!!
Did i proof read: .... I honestly dont remember writing this soo.. you BET your tooth i didn’t proof read
Rating: fluffy!
Fandom: DC
God your such a big Dork!”
Laughing loudly your sides hurt , Clark just tripped and slide right into a lamp and somehow managed for the shade too be on. His head. You reached over helping him chuckling softly tracing your hands over his broad shoulders making sure he wasn’t hurt. Those Hurting Clark was physically impossible. You still worry.
He chuckled softly saying sorry, you just laughed giving him a quick kiss on the shoulder as you shifted too move too your sofa.
Loving Superman had it’s perks and downsides, the biggest one was that Loris Lane was Furious that you “stole” her profit. Clark always said that Louis never abused their relationship too get articles or too gain more popularity. But she was literally the Only reporter in the entire City that Had Full access too the most talked about man in the entire world.Getting raises left and right when She got a “in-depth “ conversation with Superman and ally he deets on a attack. Whatever way Clark spelt it out. You hated that she abused her relationship for gain at work. It felt wrong. She was literally Sleepign with the subject too information.
It didn’t help that your relationship with her was tense even before you knew she knew about Clarks double life. You were one of the few humans too know about Clarks ability before he became Superman. You grew up right down the road from Clark, same grade, best friends all thru school. Clark would show off his powers too you when you were younger and you were the only one outside he’s family too know. After he left and ran off too find himself you stayed and helped his mom and then Superman arrived and you reconnected with your oldest friend and you moved toot he city after a awful breakup and you just always were around. And Louis hated it. You tried too be friendly towards her. But once Clark discovered she was In bed with lex Luther. (Right in the middle of the Act.) he was furious And heartbroken and he broke up with her and you were secretly glade you didn’t have too pretend too be friends with her anymore.
Dating the man of steel happened so naturally you can’t even remember when it started or how it started who made the first move it just felt Right. Clark was smiling cupping your face looking at you “what you thinking about?”
Poking his stoumch you look up at him grinning, “how I’m so lucky too have my Dork.” He chuckled reaching over kissing your head. “I have too go surveillance with Bruce you be alright tonight?”
Nodding your head weakly. You were use too having too share Clark with the world. Honestly how can you complain when he’s Saving the literally world?
“Oh Ask Bruce How The Hell do you connect the light too the speakers? Too do that flashy thing.he’s instructions Suck!”
He chuckled saying okay.
He walked off. As you grinned excited too have the apartment too yourself. You walked over too your room getting out of your Jeans and into Shorts and a shirt of clarks you always steal it had he’s favourite football team. Making dinner for you, and a dessert. You grabbed your Tablet (making sure too put sticky tack on both lenses after reading how easily the cameras’ are hacked you always put Sticky tack on it if your gonna watch something in the tub.
Getting the Tub ready you started binge watching a the musketeers. When you finished having a relaxing bath you got into your cloths again and watched it on the tv. The actors were Hot as Hell. And the voices. Melting! Clark had that affect on you. He’s voice was smooth and deep and Hot. Those every aspect of your boyfriend is Hot.
You looked around realizing the place was empty as you went too the freezer as you pulled out your container of Icing. Before retuning too the sofa and warming it up as you had your spoon from your ice cream and mixed it as you watched tv. An hour passed when jumped gasping at some scenes. Then you heard the deep chuckle of your boyfriend.
“what are you doing?” You turned looking at Clark seeing him in his uniform as you had a spoon sticking out of your mouth as you spoke, “I’m- what are you doing here? I thought you were going too be late?”
“I came too check on you- what are you watching?” Getting up as you grabbed the icing container as you spoke, “Mustkeers.- what- aren’t you suppose too be hanging with a bat?” He chuckled walking over pulling you into a deep kiss it was unexpected as he pulled back as he spoke, “good icing.” You laughed hitting his softly as he grinned holding your head. “You smell nice.”
“had a bath with my good stuff.” He chuckled softly rubbing your cheek with his thumb.
“thank you.”
“For. Bathing?”
Clark chuckled kissing your forehead as he spoke, “No for being you.”
“thank you?”
He kissed you again before dashing off as you got ready for bed.
Standing in the shower in the morning getting cleaned you turned seeing Clark standing in the bathroom smiling as you spoke ‘what?”
Seeing him pulling off his Shirt, which even after a year of dating. Still left you breathless seeing him shirtless. He was curved and caved from the Gods! It still took you back that he was yours. That this guy. Who looks like a god, has powers As if he was one. Was your you giggled seeing him quickly undress and Joining you in the shower. Quickly pulling you into a deep Kiss,
Perfection can only last for so Long.
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It was wrong place at the wrong time. You were In a Church helping your friend choose a location for her wedding when a machine came Crashing into the Chapel destroying it. And the impact flung you backwards and you were pierced thru the stoumch by a pipe it slipped thru you like butter. You were pinned too the wall as you looked up seeing Lex Luther appear from the robotic machine he laughed loudly seeing you.
Superman arrived instantly you saw him just in time too loose vision from loosing so much blood. You heard him screaming No! As you drift.
Clark Dashed over too you seeing you impaled and pinned too the wall. He’s screams broke windows of the church as he fell down onto his knees realizing that you were gone. The girl who Never treated him like anything then a boy. The boy she has known her whole life. Who once learning about everything about him. Simply asked if she kissed him could she get the ability too be super strong. The girl who use too help him practice how too control who would sneak over too play with him. Who was his first kiss. The women who idea of a fun night in is. Watching a fantasy show and be bare legged and as comfy as possible. Clark felt his soul breaking seeing you. The Girl he was going too marry.have a family with.
“Opps.”
Luther said giddy seeing Clark in so much pain. Before Clark could find the strength too move. Luther dissapeared.
Clark screamed NO. You were gone..
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Weeks passed with No sighting of Luther, Bruce ended up going toot he funeral, so did Diana , and Berry who you once meeting the flash instantly wanted too bet that Clark was faster. And you and him would have in debut conversations about Harry Potter. Wonder women was close with you also. You worked in a museum , and she would telly you stories a bout the greek gods. And the Amazon women. Cyborg was amazed a girl of this time. Couldn’t figure out how too do anything technical. You were as clueless as a 80 year old man trying too make a call on a smart phone.
Arther arrived toot he funeral with the others as he stood up too talk.the funeral was beauitful, and the wake was Sad. Clark’s Mom invited all the justice league too her house. Where Clark was staying since Luther has been MIA.
“when I first met that feisty women. She asked if I could really talk too whales and asked what they liked talking about. Then she told me I this insane theory of whales being fictional. Apparently that girl lived on the coast for two years. And Never saw a whale.Clark took her too my dads lighthouse and I got a few too pop up too show them off. I never seen a happier person in my life. She acted like a kid on Christmas Day .she was- something special.”
They all chuckled as Clark was silent holding his hands tightly as Diana stood up. “When I first met Y/N. she was covered head too toe in dirt and Mud. She was playing football with Clark.- She looked like the happiest girl in the world. I knew excatly at that moment she was madly in love. I remember looking like that at Steve. She asked me too help scare Clark it was- apparently her mission in life too scare him Once.-“ Diana went quite Seeing Clark was stiff. She knew excatly how he felt. Hallow inside with going thru the motion.
Bruce was about too speak when the front door opened. Seeing Y/N covered in dirt. You stood in the front entrance covered in dirt wearing the dress you were buried in. You coughed loudly as Clark Rushed over too you griping your face tightly, “how- How is this possible?”
“what the hell happened?”
Everyone looked at each other stunned as Diana heard a fast beating sound.
“Y/N? Is that you?” Clark was crying too hard too hear anything as Diana stepped over as she kneeled down pressing her ear too your stomach.
“it’s a heartbeat.”
“WHAT?” Gasping loudly as Clark was too stunned too take any of that information in. But your ears were working. “Shut up no it’s not! I- I was. In the church wasn’t I when that bastered- how- I woke up in the graveyard what the fuck! Is going on?!”
“how did you get out of the grave.. you were just Barried this morning.”
Rolling your shoulders you shook your head, “I woke up up above ground.. I wans’t- you buried me? What the Hell why!” You hit Clark as he gripped your face tightly as he spoke, “you scared the Shit outta me! How- I don’t understand you were died.”
You rolled your shoulders, “Don’t look at me! The last thing I remember was being in the church.. what- what happened?”
“you died..But I think your baby protected you.”
That’s when Clarks ears started working as he turned too wonderwomen. “Excuse me? Baby?”
“Oh Boy..’
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theculturedmarxist · 3 years
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William absolutely loved getting COVID. His symptoms weren’t severe: lethargy and the loss of taste and smell. “My girlfriend somehow tested negative. She packed a bag and went to her parents’ house for like three weeks and it was amazing,” he said. “I had a great excuse to do nothing … It was the best. I feel guilty saying it. I just really love solitude. I ate Thanksgiving by myself. I binge-watched Boardwalk Empire on HBO. I got to set up the apartment the way I wanted. It was amazing. When I think about it, like you know how when you think back to a summer between grades when you were a kid or a vacation? Like, I want to catch it again on some level.”
It’s not like William is particularly proud of how much he’s loved his pandemic life. (He asked me to refer to him only by his middle name due to the sensitive nature of his job working with people who have substance-use disorder.) “I have COVID-love shame,” he said. “I don’t tell anybody about this … A lot of my dread is purely, for lack of a better word, selfish.” Pandemic life has been easy for him: He is in the business of conducting interventions, which are trickier on Zoom than they are in person — the interventionee can “just get up and leave the room” — but nevertheless, work has been mostly great. He got a promotion after the pandemic started. He’s in “the best shape of [his] life” because he’s been using “the extra time” lockdown has given him to ride his bike, box, and swim. “I’ve had explicit permission to just stay home and I have got my own self-sustaining ecosystem here … work, food, exercise, recreation,” he said. “I just feel so much more control of my experiences. I’m just dreading traffic, ‘meet me at the coffee shop at three,’ ‘I’m ten minutes late,’ baby showers, [gender] reveals. Like, I don’t want to do any of that fucking shit.”
The pandemic year has been hard for many, with all the sickness, death, layoffs, confinement, and isolation. But for a socially anxious and solitude-loving crew, it has been a sort of strange blessing. William is certainly not the only person who is worried about returning to a world of everyday in-person communication. According to a recent study by the American Psychological Association, many adults “feel uneasy about adjusting to in-person interactions once the pandemic ends.” (57 percent of Black adults, 51 percent of Asian adults, 50 percent of Hispanic adults, and 47 percent of white adults said they somewhat/strongly agree with that sentiment.)
“I’ve always been very self-conscious in public,” said Breanna Martins, a high-school art teacher and painter who lives in Boston. “I’m intersex, so I always felt like I got extra stares while I was out in public. I tried to compensate for that by being extra gregarious and outgoing.” It wasn’t until lockdown began that Martins realized she preferred a slower, less intensely social life. The pandemic turned out to be a boon for her art practice. “I’ve never been as productive as I was those first three months of quarantine,” she said. “I was able to segment off from the world and just focus on my art, creation without expectations and fear of other people critiquing it or seeing it because I knew there weren’t going to be any shows anytime soon.” 2020 was one of the best years of her life, Martins told me, and she feels guilty about that.
Arthur, who asked me to only refer to him by his first name, got sober in July 2019, and the world shutting down a few months later gave him space to figure out who he is without alcohol. When he was drinking, he always fancied himself an extrovert, using alcohol as social lubrication. His work involves a fair amount of wining and dining, which was really hard after he quit drinking but before the pandemic began. Being off the hook for those high-pressure social situations came as an immense relief. “One of the epiphanies I had was that I’m really an introvert,” he told me.
He’s used the extra time and solitude that the pandemic has given him for self-discovery. He’s learned that he loves to read, hike, and sit outside and daydream. The pandemic, he said, “has been like a cave for a hibernating bear.” Arthur doesn’t feel guilty about how much he’s enjoyed the last year. “I feel gratitude for it,” he said.
Not everybody who is dreading reopening had a really great year. For William Strecker, a 28-year-old who lives in Texas, the pandemic year allowed him to put his life on pause. After getting laid off from his job in March of last year, he moved from Austin to his parents’ house in the Dallas area. “It was the best-case scenario for me at the time,” he said. “I was kind of happy to get out of there, happy to get severance.” Moving back in with his parents has given him the opportunity to “build a new adult relationship with them.”
But his year of unemployment has been one of inertia. “I wanted to be a writer,” Strecker said, having studied English in college. “I was hoping that this would be an opportunity for me to kind of reevaluate things and start putting myself on a path [to the] career that I actually wanted to be doing. But I guess being in isolation all the time, I started drinking too much, maybe smoking too much, just kind of letting all of the bad habits that weren’t habits before COVID take over. Everything’s been kind of a blur.”
For Strecker, the prospect of having to play an active role in his life is scary. “I’m really worried whenever things open up again …” he trailed off. “I’ve spent six months just like in a void, in limbo. I’m not really confident what that will look like when things start to open up again … I don’t have a job lined up yet. And then I’m worried that some of my social skills have deteriorated a little bit with so much time being anti-social.”
Vinh Hoang, a 32-year-old attorney in San Diego, has a straightforward reason for not being excited about the country reopening: social anxiety. He moved back in with parents in 2020, and hasn’t really socialized with friends, as to not put them at risk. “The ability to be social in a public place with strangers, it’s kind of like a muscle I haven’t used for a year-plus,” Hoang said. “If someone asked me on a date or something, and said, ‘Hey let’s go to a brewery,’ I would definitely feel, not fear, but more anxiety. It feels like I’m rusty and out of practice because I definitely haven’t talked to anyone for a good length of time during quarantine.”
Whenever things go back to normal, Martins, the teacher, hopes that people don’t forget all that they learned over the past year. “We learned about what it means to have a home,” she said. “I think about all the people who started gardens or started baking or really leaned into things they were passionate about or found new passions. I know it’s Pollyannaish to say, but it worries me that people might lose that sense of what fulfills them.”
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sometipsygnostalgic · 4 years
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Halfway through umbrella academy season 2!
Tried to add a readmore but it doesn’t fucking work anymore.
Spoilers below
[[MORE]]
It is quite different from season 1. I feel like it has lost a lot of its style. However, part of that style was the characters staying as assholes forever, and in this season they DON’T do that. Thank god!!!
Favourite scene so far is when they all dance in the hairdressers in ep 5. Vanya being part of the gang for once is pretty fun. Allison is also waaaaay more compelling. I love that they brought up how weird the whole incest thing is.
Now, about the gay:
Improvement on dead boyfriend. Though, now he’ll be dead probably-never-comes-out boyfriend. Well done Klaus. I can’t blame him for trying to stop Dave from going to war. Then again it’s possible this is part of Dave’s original history.
Vanya and the farmer’s wife: Hmmm. I saw this coming very early, because farm wife was very attached to her. I cringed throughout the developments because it was all highly predictable, and because I have reservations about them deciding to make specifically ELLEN PAGE’s character into women - never part of Gerard’s comic, clearly chosen because of Ellen Page! Last time I saw media do this, it was with new trek Sulu because his old actor was played by George. George was extrenely unhappy with how they made Sulu gay (in a 5 second background scene) just because he was. It was cowardly of them. They could’ve made Kirk bi, but chose to do what was easiest for the audience to swallow and praise the writers for instead, against the wishes of a real life gay man...
However I look forward to hearing Ellen Page’s take. She’ll probably have encouraged this direction.
The romance itself? Pretty great. Proud of Vanya for not accidentally murdering the husband or blowing up the house. Her Moses moment was also incredible. And I too have fallen for the 60s housewife, who may or may not be connected to the apocalypse in some bizarre homestuck way.
Vanya: finally not left out of the loop forever, nor on the verge of mass murder. Theyre not exactly encouraging her to use her abilities though. Also she got a buff, if she wasnt ALREADY ungodly powerful. Nerf to follow. Maybe she isn’t quite as OP by the apocalypse as she was back when she repressed all feeling in season 1.
Luther himself: still sucks but i no longer hate his guts, it helps that hes taken a back seat from trying to aggressively lead and fuck everything up. He also apologised which is nice. He is a funny loser.
Diego: i might remember he exists by the end of this season
Allison: decides to go headfirst into racial politics. Her powers got a buff! I dont think she was capable of actually blowing up heads last season.
Klaus: slightly less kino than before because he hasnt been involved with much action and his jokes don’t hit hard (that solo drinking binge scene with the camera following him sucked). He also had several cringe moments so far (dave). However, I love him. I love that the 60s think of him as Jesus. He should be even more famous than he is, really.
Five: still a detestable little shit. Still smart. Wondering when he’ll become capable of saying nice things. I believe in the comic he was even more of a fuckboy, he was a tiny 10 year old there. He’s also good at fighting.
Ben: i wonder if it’s possible for ben to get a character arc where he sends messages to his other siblings in the blood from him punching Klaus
Reggie: only has room in his heart for one son - the monkey
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janellion · 4 years
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Hey babes!!!just realized i almost missed bokay thursday and i was so freaked bc i live for yalls dynamic :0!!! Ok so i have 2 questions (just for funsies but also if u have a lot of asks skip over this and dont overwhelm urself!!) 1) What do yalls weekends/ days off work look like together?? 2) What is yalls go to song to sing together in the car or in the kitchen??? -Lola 🌸 (hina-wit-da-glock)
LOLA BABE HI!!! omg you’re totally fine!!! every day is bokay day for me so don’t worry at all!!! send in asks anytime hehe (i was inspired by this so i’m answering it now i’m sorry to all those whose asks are in my drafts rn 🥺) tysm for requesting this!!!
bokay weekends and days off
so if i have anything to say abt it we will be sleeping in!! ik a lot of people see bo as a night owl just bc of the fact that he is,,, an owl,,, but i rly are him as an “up at any and all hours!!” kind of person
he can stay up w me til 3a but also just as easily be up at 6a w our bulldog for a walk (where bo carries him jshsh)
after we both get up (and after bo does his morning workouts if we are talking canon bokay) we have breakfast together!! usually cereal bc we love cereal in the bokay household 😌 if bo needs to be healthy for training he will have oatmeal or another less sugar alternative!!
weekends and days off go one of two ways: ADVENTURE!!!! or rest and relax
we like to go on day trips to new places we haven’t been before!! whether that’s the beach or a new city or town that we haven’t seen, we’ll go for the day or for the weekend and just see the sights and explore!!
if we stay in and rest and relax, we will binge a show or have a movie marathon!! bo loves building pillow and blanket forts so we get ELABORATE and build giant ones in the living room where we cuddle up all day and watch whatever we’re feeling that day (if it’s scary movies we have to watch them w the sun out bc i am a babie 😔🤚🏽)
we also rly like to go out to eat so we’ll do that when we have the time and ability!! especially when we go on the day adventures we will try new places and things to eat! when we stay in, we’ll either run down the road to our local favorite restaurant or order in!! relaxing days are for owl onesies only 🥰✨
go to car song(s)
sit next to me - foster the people
favorite girl - the icarus account
WYAF - pacific
coachella - lovelytheband
i really love you - griggs
go to kitchen song(s)
chai tea - aubrey
deep brown eyes - the bedside kites 
the first time - miki fiki
+++
🌻 bokay taglist (also my faves): @deadontheinsidebut @stcrryskies @sstardusty @zoni @kuronekomama @anianimol @the-kool-aid-man-is-real @nekoma-hoe @sugacookiies @churochuu @shoyosun @achoohq
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ofniko · 5 years
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✧ · ˚ . troye sivan? nah, that’s just nicolas “niko” palmer. you know, they’re the twenty-one year-old youtuber-turned-musician from petaluma, california… still doesn’t ring a bell ? come on, dude ! they’re all over ME.MIAMI’S homepage. it’s impossible for them to stay off of it because of the fact that they’re super mercurial & immature. they’re not all bad though, ‘cause they can be ambitious & warm-hearted too ! you can totally tell they’re a gemini… it’s almost scary. look, if you want to remember them, just think of a shiny pink vinyl skirt with pristine nails to match, designer shopping bags weighing down twiggy arms, and margaritas with extra sugar around the rim, and you’ll be golden. ( flexible pronouns, genderfluid. )
hello friends ! im!! so excited to be back 😭but for those of u i don’t know i’m lainie, she/her, cst, and i talk about stephen king too much :/ below u can find a very lazy intro with some summarized points and stuff (if you knew niko before there’s some changes to his bg, most notably his parents not being wildly wealthy), also bc it’d midterm szn i’m dealing w that this week/part of next week lmao but ill be around ! and i’ll def be here for plotting n stuff tonight so come smash a heart and ill slide up in ur dms or come hmu here or on discord (starslut#0877) whichever works best for you MWAH
background/history
niko was born and raised in petaluma, california. his dad was a wannabe entrepreneur whose tendency was to put all his time and investment money into projects that never worked or came to fruition before moving onto the next one, while his mom lazily strove to be an actress (like her sister, winona ryder) but never had the ambition or frankly talent to actually make anything happen. money from niko’s paternal grandparents as well as whatever his dad did manage to make with investments kept them afloat. they were by no means wealthy, but his parents liked to live as if they were. that meant a lot of fake china, fake brand clothing, fake diamonds, and otherwise cheap ostentation
they also didn’t pay a whole lot of attention to him. they were wrapped up in their own fantasy lives and overall, niko got a minimal amount of affection and attention from his parents who were much more impressed with their ability to find fake diamonds that looked real than their child
niko was not totally immune to the effects that kind of upbringing had on him (although it always struck him as a little weird), but the thing that saved him from becoming like his parents was his connection to his aunt, winona, and her family. as a kid niko only saw them at family events (mostly because his mom was always so bitter about her sister’s success that she hated seeing them) but as he began reaching adolescence he started making a habit of secretly going to visit a lot without his parents’ knowledge
he felt more comfortable there, more accepted (especially with his confusion surrounding gender identity and sexual orientation), and most of all, his cousin logan was his favorite person in the whole world and he looked up to her like a big sister
it was when he first started high school, around age 14, that niko finally ran away from home and showed up at the palmers’ house with a suitcase and asked to be adopted. and he was! winona took him into her home, made the adoption legal, and niko even changed his last name to reflect his new, real family
niko was so much happier in this new environment where he wasn’t brushed off as part of the furniture that he really started to flourish around then. he started experimenting with his femininity and non-gender-conforming dress styles, allowed himself room to figure out his sexuality, and even came to terms with his genderfluidity with a lot of love and support from logan and the fam
he also started his youtube channel around junior year in high school! it was mostly fashion and makeup stuff and it steadily gained a following until he had a good enough platform (and with huge help from the connections he had through winona) to jump into music, which had always been something he loved and wanted to do eventually
he released an ep the summer after he graduated high school (which was received pretty well) and finally a debut album with a major label a little more than a year later when he was twenty. the debut album was what threw niko into the real spotlight--it was all over the radio and eventually went platinum, solidifying his presence as a modern pop star with a devoted fan base
personality
gregarious and extraverted sometimes to a fault, niko can easily get on the nerves of people who don’t have the energy to keep up. he’s like a child who never quite grew out of adolescence, and with that boundless energy also comes a selfishness he’s usually unaware of. it can be very difficult for niko to be conscious of the way his actions affect other people and ends up hurting those close to him that way
in that same vein, when he does realize what he’s done, he’s more often than not consumed with guilt over it and will go to great lengths to try and resolve the issue
not that he always does a good job
he sleeps around a lot mostly because he enjoys it, but partly because he doesn’t know how to have a relationship. the lingering adolescence makes it so he doesn’t have the necessary awareness of another person’s needs to be in a stable relationship and he manages to a large degree to convince himself he doesn’t care and prefers being single anyway
besides music, fashion is his favorite thing in the world and though he doesn’t wear a lot of makeup on the daily, he definitely dabbles and has a lot of fun experimenting
catch him exploring the city and taking pictures, partying, clubbing, brunching, and shopping on the regs and if he’s in a Mood, you can usually tell bc he goes on shopping binges and fusses to an extreme degree over his appearance
also he volleys back and forth between dyeing his hair platinum blond and then going back to his natural brown
connection ideas
gal and gay pals :’) for fashion and shopping and instagram photoshoots
also a best friend ride or die pleaSE and thank u
i need enemies and angst and drama so give me everyone who hates niko/thinks he’s a fake bitch/can’t stand him/his music
high school connections are cute so maybe someone he didn’t get along w back then and does now/vice versa where they were rly close and something turned them against each other and now it’s world war 3 (assuming they grew up in cali!)
COLLABS ??!!!!!!! on music ofc but also possibly youtubers etc he worked with back when he was mainly on there before he released his album
umm!!!! someone who like they DONT get along usually and everyone knows they’re weird frenemies but they VIBE SO HARD when theyre drunk and partying
an ex or two who probably lasted maybe like 3-4 months and it didn’t work out either bc they cheated on niko (would love this angst) OR bc niko was too flaky for them and they couldn’t handle the way niko doesn’t rly understand intimacy and broke it off OR!!! they got really clingy and niko broke it off himself
those were probably referenced on his album and also i’d love to plot specific things that inspired some of his songs
someone who can challenge!! that!! and it’s freaking niko out bc he’s starting to catch Feels but doesn’t know what to do w it/doesn’t know if they feel the same way
PR stuff please thanks!!!!!
maybe like gyeurhus someone he’s a big fan of but they have no idea who he is
vice versa where they’re a huge fan of niko and he’s completely unaware of them
someone who produces his music P L E A S E bc i see niko writing the lyrics but someone else actually doing the sound production and helping with the music writing process etc
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thegeminisage · 6 years
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not to get overly personal on main but i think the absolute worst part of depression is not the crying spells or the intrusive morbid thoughts or the mood swings or the psychosomatic bullshit or even the executive dysfunction b/c i can deal w/ being sad or anxious or mad or achy or being unable to do shit like make my own dinner
what i rly can’t handle is the complete & total lack of ability to process any sort of pleasure at all
like no matter what fun activity u think of, it’s boring. name it. i don’t wanna write. i don’t wanna draw. i don’t want to eat or play with the cats or listen to music or play old video games or play new video games or watch tv or go to the movies or clean house or do jigsaw puzzles or drive or read fanfiction or open 100 tabs on tvtropes or youtube binge or play DDR or ANYTHING
and like when i’m hanging out with other people it’s not as bad it’s more stimulating and i can sort of have a little fun in the moment
but when i’m by myself? bored. i think at this point if you threw me out of a moving airplane sans chute or told me i just won a million in the lottery my reactions would be about the same. if i’m sad like whatever it sucks but emotions are temporary & you dig yourself out of the hole sooner or later? but like even when you get out of the low point it’s USELESS if you can’t get high enough to get back to “normal” let alone “happy” - these days if i’m by myself  “bored and not actively upset about anything” is the absolute BEST i can expect emotionally. that’s just all i got.
ofc, i am typing this in the middle of the night right before bedtime - i typically feel a little better right after i’ve woken up. but that’s the thing - normally i am So Fucking Involved with what i am doing i absolutely loathe having to stop and do things like eat and sleep and i don’t go to bed until the last possible minute. now i'm going to bed like 3-4 hours earlier than usual just because i’m bored stupid and can’t think of shit else better to do. almost my entire day (if it’s a GOOD day) is spent feeling like i’m in a hospital waiting room and that shit will wear anybody the fuck out.
and if you dont have access to meds (i dont even have health insurance lol) literally the only thing to do is just wait around until ur brain starts producing dopamine again. like............there are no options here! nothing works! it’s too boring! 
(reblog this and i’ll kill you myself lol)
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acidwaste · 6 years
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hey so it seems i’ve forgot to do a l o t of tag memes, and i’m lucky i drafted a big bunch of them! lots of questions overlapped so i did my best to answer in different ways, sorry for the lateness! also @ the people that tagged me here, i wouldn't hesitate to kill for you
@natcaptor / @gayspaced
name: leon or lionel!
nicknames: literally the only nickname I’ve been referred to is “big gay” and like. word!
gender: im pretty sure im a guy, i have been kinda 🤔🤔🤔 abt my gender identity since around november-ish though
star sign: sagittarius!
height: 6’1! i’m told that I’m tall but my uncle is 6’7 so...
time: 3:36pm rn! ive been watching video essays and binging music all afternoon
birthday: december 9th!
favourite bands: animal collective, beach house, camp cope, car seat headrest, death grips, fleet foxes, florence + the machine, gang of youths, glass animals, gorillaz, hop along, iceage, idles, kero kero bonito, mgmt, miike snow, modest mouse, run the jewels, superorganism, the avalanches, the cat empire, the go! team, the mountain goats, the wombats, xiu xiu
favourite solo artists: alex lahey, anderson .paak, ariana grande, billie eilish, bjork, cashmere cat, charli xcx, courtney barnett, cupcakke, d.r.a.m, eric taxxon, frank ocean, gfoty, hatchie, janelle monae, jeff rosenstock, joanna newsom, jorja smith, jpegmafia, kacey musgraves, kali uchis, kendrick lamar, khalid, kimbra, lorde, mac demarco, madeon, mick jenkins, mitski, oneohtrix point never, perfume genius, ravyn lenae, rina sawayama, serpentwithfeet, sophie, st. vincent, sza, vince staples
song stuck in my head: caramelo duro | miguel // kali uchis! its a bop, miguel is one of the few singers that can convincingly make sex jams
last movie i watched: deadpool 2! it was even better than the first, which is a feat in itself ngl
when did i create my blog: december 2016??? i only started using it properly in february last year tho
last thing i googled: “im in my mums car broom broom.” dont @ me
do i have any other blogs: yeah, plenty actually!! i have blogs for aesthetic (@moltenstar), general inspo (@wverns), flight rising (@szarising, kinda inactive?), and overwatch (@blackhardts) tbh the vast majority of my ‘sideblogs’ are just saved urls H
do i get asks: when i say stupid shit like “rung has the ass of a dilf but the dick of a cockroach”
why i chose my url: that one panel where kobd have a vacation at the acid wastes because fuck its finally canon babey!
following: 1,767, which is kinda horrifying!!
followers: 890?? somehow??? thats almost One Whole Thousand and i don't even make content
average hours of sleep: around 6 or 7!! n e v e r more though
lucky number: 43 and 64!!
instruments: i'm too poor to afford music lessons or instruments jsbddsjknfs
what am i wearing: a grey shirt and nothing on my bottom half so my [redacted] is hanging tf out, i should put on some damn clothes
dream job:  oooo uhhh, i’m studying to get an education degree rn because i’d love to teach children (around grade 3-4s preferably because i'm too jittery to handle anyone younger and older kids probs won't listen to me as much as i lack plenty of assertiveness), but!! i’d honestly love to be a musician, one of those underground ones that get lots of critical acclaim
dream trip: one day i wanna gather up some friends and just go on a road trip! idm where we go to, as long as we just have fun and just! adventure!
favourite foods: rare steak, mashed potatoes, eggs, and energy shakes made with like. fruit / cheese / yoghurt / oats / chia seeds ! protein is a large part of my diet
nationality: new zealand, but living in australia
favourite song right now: best part | daniel caesar // h.e.r - gosh i need to re-listen to daniel’s album again, i don’t remember this beautiful song being there and that’s a crime
@damndesi / @novarebel / @luciform-philogynist
APPEARANCE - I am 5'7 or taller - I wear glasses - I have at least one tattoo (but I am getting a tā moko in December, I believe) - I have at least one piercing (planning to get a nose ring, like a bull!) - I have blonde hair - I have brown eyes - I have short hair - My abs are at least somewhat defined (b a r e l y) - I have or had braces
PERSONALITY - I love meeting new people - People tell me I am funny - Helping others with their problems is a big priority of mine - I enjoy physical challenges - I enjoy mental challenges - I am playfully rude to people I know - I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it - There is something I would change about my personality
ABILITY - I can sing well - I can play an instrument - I can do over 30 pushups without stopping (barely) - I am a fast runner - I can draw well - I have a good memory - I am good at doing math in my head - I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute - I have beaten at least 2 people arm wrestling - I can make at least 3 recipes from scratch - I know how to throw a proper punch
HOBBIES - I enjoy sports - I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else - I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else - I have learned a new song in the past week - I exercise at least once a week - I have gone for runs at least once a week in warmer months - I have drawn something in the past month - I enjoy writing - Fandoms are my #1 priority - I do some form of Martial arts
EXPERIENCES - I have had my first kiss - I have had alcohol (tastes like shit) - I have scored a winning point in a sport - I have watched an entire TV series in one sitting - I have been at an overnight event - I have been in a taxi - I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year - I have beaten a video game in one day - I have visited another country - I have been to one of my favorite bands concerts
MY LIFE - I have one person that I consider to be my Best Friend - I live relatively close to my school/work - My parents are still together - I have at least one sibling - I live in the United States - There is snow where I live right now - I have hung out with a friend in the past month - I have a smart phone - I own at least 15 CDs - I share my room with someone
RELATIONSHIPS - I am in a Relationship - I have a crush on a celebrity - I have a crush on someone I know - I’ve been in at least 3 relationships - I have never been in a Relationship - I have admitted my feelings to a crush - I get crushes easily - I have had a crush for over a year - I have been in a relationship for over a year - I have had feelings for a friend
RANDOM - I have break-danced - I know a person named Jamie - I have had a teacher that has a name that is hard to pronounce - I have dyed my hair - I’m listening to a song on repeat right now - I have punched someone in the past week - I know someone who has gone to jail - I have broken a bone (do fractures count?) - I have eaten a waffle today - I know what I want to do in life - I speak at least two languages (not fluently) - I have made a new friend in the past year
@smstransformers
age: 16
birthplace: auckland, nz
current time: 4:19 pm rn!!!
drink you last had: i just skulled half a liter of water whoops
favourite song: jesus etc. | wilco if we're talking abt an all-time favourite
grossest memory: accidentally swallowing a bee when i was seven years old (somehow nothing bad happened?)
horror, yes or no: not unless it’s an incredibly tame horror t b h, my threshold for scariness is very low
in love: i believe so!
jealous of people: lots of times, over really dumb things
love by first sight or should I walk by again: i believe that infatuation can exist at first sight but true love not so much. wish that could happen tho :C
middle name: shane!
siblings: my sister is eight years old, and my brother is seven!
one wish: EZ, make my anxiety disappear, i’d have a much more productive life
song i last sang: jupiter | haiku hands
time i woke up: 7:13, woke up immediately because i usually like to wake at 6:30
underwear colour: blue + purble
vacation destination: auckland / kingston / sydney!
worst habit: not remembering to make my goddamn bed, it looks like garbage
favourite food: mashed potatoes….
zodiac sign: sagittarius !!!
@alyonian
relationship status:
at the moment i’m single! and while being in a relationship sounds brilliant, the last two relationships i was involved in? didn’t work out to say the least, lucky i’m still young
favourite colour:
it’s been emerald green for the longest time but orange seems to be dethroning it at a steady pace
lipstick or chapstick:
i haven’t used chapstick since i was six but i probably should use it again, water is my substitute rn fdghdgh - and i haven’t ever used lipstick in any capacity? so i’d have to go with the former
last song i listened to:
the space traveller’s lullaby | kamasi washington - i’m trying to get through his second album rn (i left off on the second disk yesterday) and while everything he makes is undeniably amazing, it’s? a three hour album? i don’t have the attention span for his spiritual jazz, as great as it is
last movie:
monsters inc is playing on the television right now, i’ll go with that! the animation aged kinda badly but it’s still such a fun movie! sidenote: james p. sullivan? a childhood crush, so this gives me memories
top 3 tv shows/podcasts/comics:
i rarely, if ever, venture into these forms of media but! if i had to answer, i’d say;
unbreakable kimmy schmidt / parks & recreation / luke cage
taz / mbmbam (i havent like. watched a full episode of either but they seem cool,)
tf idw / …………. yeah that’s it, i’ve never read anything else. probably should!
additional favs:
my friends, writing (in theory), listening to video essays, learning music theory + instruments and understanding audio production software
top 3 bands / artists:
HHH okay if i had to limit my choices to just three artists, uh. lorde, the mountain goats, and sophie. i couldnt even fit janelle in i hate th is
----------------------------------
@alyonian
color(s): light colors are always nice and pleasant, though anything peachy and sandy are the best! orange (specially pastel orange) is like. the best thing
last band t-shirt i bought: usually merchandising is very expensive and i dont have the money to accommodate that, but like. i do recall having a wiggles shirt when i was five. i wore it all the time, shjdjgsksd im sure that counts
last band i saw live: i almost went to splendor in the grass last year with family, which wasn't only cool since i’ve never been out of the state since i immigrated - the festival was in queensland, which is around a two hour flight from victoria - but the lineup was pretty fuckin lit too! the xx, haim, peking duk, tash sultana, future islands, vallis alps, a.b original,, i was p excited! unfortunately my uncle fell ill and so they had to give the tickets to extended family :( otherwise, i haven't been to a single concert in my life
last song i listened to: street fighter mas | kamasi washington - up to this song on the album and i really fuckin dig this! also the video is hypnotizing
last movie i watched: monsters inc is about to finish and up next is monsters university! which like…. honestly, this is an extremely unpopular opinion but, i like it just as much as the original? my opinion might be skewed because i’m a monster [hugger], but i like everything abt the movie! except for the finale of the scare games and the last five minutes of the movie, both were just. dreadful.
last three tv shows i watched: if aggretsuko counts that’s the last series i watched of my own volition, which is a miracle in itself considering that’s legit only the second anime i’ve watched to completion (the first being shirokuma cafe, which i probably need to re-watch). otherwise, the last two shows i had beared witness to were thirteen reasons why and queer eye bc my cousin put them on! that first show i could completely do without but queer eye is iconique
last 3 characters i identified with: grimlock (legit. all of them), urdnot grunt (mass effect) and vector the crocodile (sth), i’m not sure what this says about me other than Big
book(s) i’m currently reading: i’m reading ‘maus’ by art spiegelman at the moment, for the third time i believe? i believe my classmates are supposed to be writing an essay on this next term and shit, this novel is heartbreaking, i haven't been this emotional when reading a book than… ever, really. it’s a recommendation of the highest caliber
@victorion
name: leon / lionel, i picked up the second name because i was in a server with an admin that was also a Leon™
nickname: besides ‘Big Gay’ i also have the nickname ‘lemon lion’ which is! nice!!
zodiac sign: archer man
height: Tall™
language(s) spoken: english / some maori + italian
fav fruit: watermelons (only when in season)
fav scent: the smell of a freezer tbh? it just smells Nice i don’t know how to properly explain it
fav season: spring! the breezes are welcoming without being overbearingly freezing
fav color: ornge,,,,
fav animal: SHARKS + CROCS + FERRETS
coffee, tea or hot chocolate: tea! with some milk tho
average hrs of sleep: too little
fav fictional character: One character?????? uhhhhhhh……. like. biggest cc right now is either idw skids or oz from monster prom
no. of blankets you sleep with: depending on my mood but i’d say the average is like, 3??
fav songs: i quickly whipped up some songs i listen to
fav artists: i came to the realization that i like acts that are considered ‘bad’ like maroon 5/drake/lil yachty etc in specific doses… i wouldn't call them good yet, but! i have no beef and thats good
fav books: remember ‘where the wild things are’??? that shit was like. literal childhood, man.. :happytears: i really need to look for a copy again
@thonany-klieme
name: leon / lionel, interchangeable really
gender: male, im probs an nb guy
star sign: sagittarius!
height: 6’1
sexuality: gay??? im not sure, im mostly attracted to other guys but i have had very brief crushes on girls + nb people? sexuality’s confusing so im gonna just latch to the gaybel (gay label) for now
lock screen image: its the album cover of 1992 deluxe by princess nokia, tho it was “T Hanos” a few days ago since i change it often - my home screen is venom but his torso says ‘fuck machine’
ever had a crush on a teacher: no??
where do you see yourself in ten years: ideally i’m teaching kids math n english, realistically i’m probably going down with the political climate
if you could go anywhere, where would you go: new zealand!! or the netherlands
what was your favorite halloween costume: halloween is not big at all where i live, the only time i tried trick or treating was when i was like 7?? i threw a bedsheet on myself and pretended to be a ghost, though since there were no eyeholes + the sheet was blue, it looked more like i was just a moving lump
last kiss: never had one
have you ever been to las vegas: nah and i dont plan to?? how do you handle regular days of 40C wtf
favorite pair of shoes: i have this pair of jandals that ive worn for a fair bit longer than my other pair of shoes, tho i only wear them in summer + very warm nights
favorite book: ngl its. ‘the very hungry caterpillar’ by eric carle. i just, love it alot and i cant explain w h y
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cheesyramynry · 7 years
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tag time
mel tagged me in a lot thanks bro
aye aye aye thanks to he homegirl @starlightjeongin ily so much melly and you’re an angel <333 eskgetit!!!
also,,, there are like,,,, 4 tags in this so uhhhhh have fun
Σ੧(❛□❛✿)Σ੧(❛□❛✿)Σ੧(❛□❛✿)Σ੧(❛□❛✿)
i dont have a name for this tag
1ST RULE: Tag 9 people you want to get to know better
> so um if you read this you are tagged now congrats <
2ND RULE: BOLD the statements that are true.
APPEARANCE: - I am 5'7 or taller - I wear glasses - I have at least one tattoo - I have at least one piercing - I have blonde hair - I have brown eyes - I have short hair - My abs are at least somewhat defined - I have or had braces
PERSONALITY: - I love meeting new people - People tell me I am funny - Helping others with their problems is a big priority of mine - I enjoy physical challenges - I enjoy mental challenges - I am playfully rude to people I know - I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it - There is something I would change about my personality
ABILITY: - I can sing well - I can play an instrument - I can do over 30 pushups without stopping - I am a fast runner - I can draw well - I have a good memory - I am good at doing maths in my head - I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute - I have beaten at least 2 people arm wrestling - I can make at least 3 recipes from scratch - I know how to throw a proper punch
HOBBIES: - I enjoy sports - I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else - I’m in a orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else - I have learned a new song in the past week - I exercise at least once a week - I have gone for runs at least once a week in warmer months - I have drawn something in the past month - I enjoy writing - Fandoms are my #1 priority - I do some form of Martial arts
EXPERIENCES: - I have had my first kiss - I have had alcohol - I have scored a winning point in a sport - I have watched an entire TV series in one sitting - I have been at an overnight event - I have been in a taxi - I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year - I have beaten a video game in one day - I have visited another country - I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts
MY LIFE: - I have one person that I consider to be my Best Friend - I live close to my school/work - My parents are still together - I have at least one sibling - I live in the United States - There is snow where I live right now - I have hung out with a friend in the past month - I have a smart phone - I own at least 15 CDs - I share my room with someone
RELATIONSHIPS: - I am in a Relationship - I have a crush on a celebrity - I have a crush on someone I know - I’ve been in at least 3 relationships - I have never been in a Relationship - I have admitted my feelings to a crush - I get crushes easily - I have had a crush for over a year - I have been in a relationship for over a year - I have had feelings for a friend
RANDOM: - I have break-danced - I know a person named Jamie - I have had a teacher that has a name that is hard to pronounce - I have dyed my hair - I’m listening to a song on repeat right now - I have punched someone in the past week - I know someone who has gone to jail - I have broken a bone - I have eaten a waffle today - I know what I want to do in life - I speak at least two languages - I have made a new friend in the past year
alphabet tag
Rules: answer the questions in a new post and tag 10 blogs you would like to get to know better
> i dont know/remember enough blogs to tag im sorry <
A: age? > 15!!! <
B: birthplace? > californiaaaa <
C: current time? > 4:43 pm <
D: drink you had last? > water bc its good for you <
E: easiest person to talk to? > my irl homie @realmzenith , the most fantastic perosn i have ever met on this site and of whom my soul burns with affection for @starlightjeongin , and my rad friends in my got7 amino groupchat - selena, haru, apple, and emi :) <
F: favorite song? > oh boy i dont have a favorite favorite song bro i guess the first things i can think of is either danzon no. 2 by arturo marquez, martini blue by dpr live, and home run by got7 <
G: grossest memory? > asdf uhh when i went hiking with my pathfinder club and we went through a “long-cut” and went off the trail and we had to walk up this super long river, and then to get out of the river to land we had to walk through these riverbed plants and this gray mud stuff and i had to put on my socks and sneakers and it was disgusting <
H: hogwarts house? > i say that im a hufflepuff, lately i got placed in ravenclaw but i dont agree <
I: in love? > in love with the fact that im old enough to be a little free, in love with my kpop faves, in love with all of my friends who tell me they appreciate me, in love with the idea of being productive, in love with music and daydreaming <
J: jealous of people? > tbh i catch myself being jealous of other people’s artistic abilities, but i turn that into a need to become better/daydream about myself being that good so uhh???? yeah <
K: killed someone? > i was playing overwatch with a friend late last night and one of our comp matches there were these two dudes who played tank, one in particular imma call CTL who was rude to me and the whole team (my mic doesnt work so i couldn’t talk back but he was still a bing bond :( ), a few rounds after we left that one we got placed against the two mean tanks, and me, a mercy main with crappy aim, 1v1ed CTL who was playing mccree and i was HAPPY. we lost but binch i teabagged the heck out of his douchy body <
L: love at first sight or should i walk by again? > walk by again im staring at you either way <
M: middle name? > danielle!! <
N: number of siblings? > i have a younger sister!! <
O: one wish? > tbh to be better at what i want to be better at, like someone please give me like a stat 100 potion or something <
P: person you called last? > last person i called was my friend mikey of whom i was playing overwatch with lmao <
R: reasons to smile? > music!!! art!!! alan menken said that there will be a musical production of hercules in the future!! <
S: song you sang last? > the finale of newsies bc my sister left it playing on the tv as i ate nine (9) quesedillas
T: time you woke up? > techinally 6:30 am bc my dog was scratching my door, then 9, then 11 am <
U: underwear color? > mint blue and gray <
V: vacation destination? > i think i would love to go to the places in europe where composers lived, that or i would love to visit every place my internet friends live :D <
W: worst habit? > probably sleeping until noon, forgetting to do important responsibility things, reading a text message/email and then not responding bc i forgot about reading it
X: x-rays? > i got an x-ray on my right arm when i fractured it in kindergarten, some on my stomach when i ate like three whole mangoes with the skin on them, and some of my teeth before i got my braces <
Y: your favorite food? > thai food, stuff from panera bread, or pretty much warm foods with rice <
Z: zodiac sign? > im a virgo!!! <
✨ Fun Facts Tag ✨
Rules for this are:
Have fun with it!
Tag some of your mutuals
1) Favourite colours:
> green or purple!!! or like whatever im feeling lmao but those are my first choices <
2) Favourite song at the moment:
> asdkfjas;ldfkjsdlkfj bro i cant choose okay im going to shuffle my fav songs playlist adn put the first thing that comes up: damdadi by golden child
3) Last book you read:
> i think its my history textbook lmao finals are this week for me <
4) Last TV show you watched:
> my friend’s younger sister showed me clips from Stranger Things but i never have watch it before, i also watched a few dramas at a friend’s house but idk the names of them lmao
5) Last movie you watched:
> oh golly uhhh i think its enemies in-laws on netflix <
6) If you have a pet whats their name?:
> i have a doggo(?) named tucker <
7) If you have siblings how many?
> i have one younger sister!1! <
8) Favourite thing to do on a weekend:
> i think resting, getting up to date with my million notifications, just scrolling through the internet, or writing <
9) Best tumblr friends:
> on tumblr i have the amazing wonderful fantastic showstopping gravity-defying dabtastical @starlightjeongin aka mel aka melly aka melmel aka infant aka like the coolest and raddest person i have ever meet 
10) Favourite thing about yourself:
> idk if this is hard to explain but sometimes i do things people dont expect, like i was using my friend’s neighbor’s airsoft gun and like they were surprised that i have pretty good aim and that just makes me feel really good yknow <
11) Favourite memory:
> back in april 2017, during my band’s new york tour, in our hotel when i asked my friend what she was watching (it was got7′s m/v hard carry)
12) 3 weird habits:
> i turn on all of my nightlights in a specific order, when its dark in my room i like to dance to music and watch myself in the mirror, i tend to randomly scream i think <
13) What would you call your style?:
> i like to wear large clothes, even though im like a medium small bc ahaha i have slight body dysphoria, i also like to wear button-ups from the men’s section that have weird designs, suspenders, and i guess things that make me feel aesthetic and free < 
14) Odd talent:
> i can clap with one hand and me fingers bend weirdly <
15) Do you have a tumblr crush?:
> i have a big ol friend crush on my dear friend mel and a lot on the gr8 ppl of the aroha fandom <
the stray kids tag
Rules: answer the questions in a new post, and tag 10 blogs you would like to get to know better.
I’ve decided that in celebration of Stray Kids pre-debut album I needed to create a tag. The ultimate goal for The Stray Kids Tag is to learn about your Tumblr mutuals, and have fun answering the Stray Kids related questions! Here we go:
1: When did you decide to join the Stray kids fandom?
> lmao i learned about them when it was rumored that jyp was going to have a new boy group, and i followed the updates until the announcement of the webseries/release of hellevator. i didnt want more ppl to remember on my plate until december 30ish when i finally gave in to mel so here i am <
2: What is your favorite episode of Stray Kids? 
> im actually going to watch it right after i finish this tag post lmao ive never watched it before but i think ive seen clips??? when the boys were vlogging themselves packing idk if thats part of the webseries but thats cute <
3: Who would you say is your bias in Stray kids?
> I DONT HAVE ONE OKAY I DONT WANT TO TRY TO FIGURE IT OUT YET IM SCARED i legit like,,, dont know a whole lot about each member but i know their names but,,,,,, i think,,,,, before i start truly getting into them myself,,,, is probably seungmin,,,,, i think,,,,,,,, maybe,,,, whoops i just remembered woojin existed uhhhHHHH idk <
4: Who would you say is your bias wrecker in Stray kids?
> (im listening to ailee’s i will go to you like the first snow rn and im so emo while doing this tag) i love all of them!!!! probs chan or changbin or jeongin bc they are so sweet!!! <
5: What line would you want to be apart of in Stray kids? 
> idk the team compositions of stray kids so i will get back to you on that one until i watch the series lmao <
6: What is the first song you heard of Stray kids?
> of course hellevator lmao <
7: What is the first song you heard of 3racha? 
> FRICK actually i dont know bc melly showed me vids of them performing live but i dont know what the song was :( <
8: What is your favorite song on their pre-debut album?
> legit only have listened to hellevator and grrr so um ill say grrr?? <
9: What is a concept you’d like to see Stray Kids try in the future?
> SUSPENSE!!! idk if that ‘s hard to explain but like something with a story in the background, maybe like a spy concept with a nice orchestration i think they can do it <
10: if you could meet with the members of Stray kids for one day what would you say to them?
> ahhh!!! i dont know they all too too well but i would love to tell them that i feel that they are different from any other kpop group i have ever seen, bc they all seem genuinely happy and they are like the coolest bros and their friendship with each other is something that i could only dream of!! also ive heard that their songs have rad lyrics and they work super hard so i look up to them for that!!!1!!! <
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patchworktail · 7 years
Text
ITS 4:30 AM AND I DONT FEEL LIKE SLEEPING so I’m gonna do this meme that i got tagged for twiCE and totally forgot to do til now!!!! (i had 2 dig through your blogs to find them omg)
ANYWAY i was tagged by both @mooitstimdrake​ and @cynessie​ (I MISS U BOTH BTW ❤)
RULES: Share 11 facts about yourself, answer 11 questions provided by the tagger, tag 11 awesome people and leave 11 questions for them to answer!
(I’m gonna skip tagging people/asking 11 questions - 1) because I’m lazy 2) because a lot of people who I would tag either have already been tagged or woN’T DO IT and 3) I have to answer two sets of 11 questions anyway so I’ll let one of those sets take the place of my 11 questions!!)
11 Facts
I was supposed to leave to move into my college 3 days ago but since my college is in Savannah they pushed off move-in/orientation for a weEK BECAUSE OF HURRICANE IRMA AND I’M STILL UPSET/DISAPPOINTED
That being said I’m about to start as a college freshman at art school, planning on majoring in animation! :D
I binged all of Buzzfeed Unsolved in like 2 days and I fuckin LOVE IT
Also BNHA is like my current main obsession???? I fell in love w that anime and uhhhh I’d Die For My Kids
I almost never use skype anymore - I’m always on Discord now (mutuals may add me just message me if you want my tag :3c)
I loooove creating OCs and my main OC is a forest elf named Rally and he’s precious and I LOVE HIM AND COULD TALK ABOUT HIM FOR HOURS (also my best friend @/harpxer and I have a huge ongoing rp with him and her mountain elf oc, Kahl!! they’re really gay)
Hmmm fun fact I guess I’ve been involved with internet communities since I was 10 years old and I made my very first internet friend when I was 10 and we’re still great friends and talk p much every day to this day (hi @/fiishr)
I want a tattoo super bad but idk what I’d geT
I worked at a jewelry engraving stand at an amusement park this summer and one night I accidentally gave myself a 1st degree burn on my finger from the hot glue gun and it hurt So Bad
I had my graduation party this July and it was really fun but the best part was when 14 of us played this giant game of spoons and it got really intense, made worse by people randomly screaming during it, and then we collectively decided to blast hardcore rap music from the speakers and Let Me Tell You i have not been involved in a more stressful card game in my LIFE
I’ll always always always fall for the hero/happy character/protagonist basically....idk what it is about me but I’m so Predictable...I love cute optimistic brave characters who just wanna do Right.....I don’t cARE IF PEOPLE THINK THEY’RE BORING I THINK THEY’RE PERFECT AND AMAZIGN AND I LOVE THEM
AS FOR AN EXTRA 12TH FACT ABOUT ME AS U CAN SEE I WRITE WAY TOO MUCH AND ALSO I’M THE BIGGEST OVERSHARER E V E R IT’S SO BAD SOMEONE STOP ME
ANYWAY ONTO THE QUESTIONS :3c
@mooitstimdrake​‘s Questions:
If you were to make a new blog dedicated to one single thing (fandom, hobby/activity, etc) what would it be? Honestly, right at the moment probably BNHA!!!! it’s legit my most recent big obsession and I love it?? so much???
If you could have any kind of animal as a pet, what would you have? A RACCOON!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THEM SOSOSOSOSOS MUCH and some people actually do have them as pets! They can be difficult though but WORTH IT
Who was your favorite teacher and why were they your favorite? OH BOY......I’m gonna say it’s a tie between my AP studio art teacher and my AP US government teacher from this past year, my senior year! My AP art teacher because our class was super tiny, 12 kids, and it really felt like a family?? She was a-okay with letting us all goof around and say weird shit, she was really chill and funny and like. part teacher, part friend, which was always nice. As for my AP gov teacher, he was SO. FUCKING. FUNNY. OH MAN. NOT EVEN ON PURPOSE he just like? put up with SO MUCH? we had some real character kids in that class and my teacher’s reactions were HILARIOUS. he had a sarcastic streak too so his responses were equally as funny when someone did something weird. He would say the funniest stuff just ask @/harpxer I would tell her so many stories from that class sohboshrb. Aside from the humor that class was really interesting, and he’s a really good, invested teacher - he wanted us to learn, he’s super passionate about government and history, and he always started off each class with 2 current events which was really nice and helped me learn more about things happening in the world too!!! overall that was like my fav non-art class I’ve ever taken!!!!
What’s your guilty pleasure (and I’m challenging you not to say some kind of food)? HMMMMM. Honestly I’m gonna go ahead and say really cheesy or lame movies/shows (like, Disney channel movies, dumb shows - like the one summer I watched all of Glee LOL, stuff like that). Like yeah I know 90% of it is terRIBLE but it’s still amusing/lighthearted stuff that makes me happy KLSDJVLSDHB
Favorite pizza topping? EXTRA CHEESE IF THAT COUNTS, if not then pepperoni!!
What’s the last thing you bought (that wasn’t food)? I’ve actually been buying a lot the past few weeks in prep for college/spending a little money for ONCE since I worked all summer. I got a bunch of boring stuff but the things I’m most excited about are: two posters I got for my dorm (The Office is one and one is Lord Huron), a giant wall tapestry (it’s Up themed!!!), tWO BNHA/POKEMON CHARMS THAT CAME TODAY AND EVERY TIME I LOOK AT THEM I START CRYING BC THEYRE SO CUTE, and oh my GOD I BOUGHT THIS GIANT PILLOW FROM TARGET AND IT IS THE SINGLE SOFTEST THING I’VE EVER FELT AND IT’S HUGE AND IT IMMEDIATELY BECAME MY #1 COMFORT OBJECT AND TOP FIVE FAV THINGS IVE EVER BOUGHT!!!!!! I guess MOST recently though I just bought Clip Studio Paint online today (art program) since it’s on sale for 50% off and I’ve heard great things about it!
What upcoming movies/tv shows are you looking forward to? UHHHHH as for movies... justice league part 1, the incredibles 2, kingsman 2, the neW POKEMON MOVIE I CHOOSE YOU, probably a lot more I can’t remember rn. AS FOR SHOWS HMMM I’m...excited for the next season of the good place and izombie, and oh I’m excited for the punisher netflix show!! and the next season of voltron of COURSE!!! and next season of stranger things!! probably more I’m forgetting too tbh
Any recommendations (this could be anything just throw your best pitch at me)? JFISDJKLBJ I DON’T KNOW OMG tbh rachel you watch a lot of the same things I do already LMAOOO
What’s your favorite thing to wear that you own? OH FUCK I DUNNO HMMM I really like wearing my various leggings and scarves, but as like a Single Item....I like wearing....uhhhh I have this giANT sweater like it’s WAY too big for me but it’s so COMFY and I love it. I also love wearing my Star Labs sweatshirt bc it’s soft and comfortable
What was your first pet? my cat!!! we took her in as a stray kitten living in our backyard when I was like. 2 or 3 and so we’ve basically had her my whole life!!
If you could learn any language, what would it be? UHHHHHH honestly probably spanish - I took it 4 straight years and was okay at it in class but one year went by with me not taking it and I forgot everything LOOOL I’m...bad....at languages....
@cynessie‘s Questions:
Where is the coolest place you’ve ever been? I haven’t been many cool places :( I guess the coolest isssss I dunno it depends? Lake George is where I go on vacation every year, I LOVE NYC, I love Savannah too and it’s where I’m gonna be for college so?? ?? ?  ? I’VE NEVER BEEN OUT OF THE COUNTRY AND I’M SAD BUT I’M POOR AND CAN’T AFFORD IT
What was the first thing you remember wanting to be when you grew up? veterinarian!! 
Look to your right. What do you see? a dirty plate on my desk, my bed just past that, and my CHARMS THAT CAME TODAY THAT ARE SO CUTE I CRY EVERY TIME I SEE THEM
What are you procrastinating on? ajkldjboidj lik e 4 art commissions,,,, and 7 MAP parts,,,, and my pre-work for 2 of my classes,,,,,,,and cleaning my room,,,, and sending thank-you notes to relatives,,, SOMEONE KICK MY ASS AND MAKE ME DO SHIT
Which family member are you closest too and what is their name? UHHHH.... I guess my younger brother Luke? or maybe my mom? I’m not on bad terms with anyone though, I love both my older brothers too and we all have a good sibling relationship I just talk more with my younger bro I think - second closest would be with my second older brother Connor!
What’s the last song you listened to? I’m listening to Ultralife by Oh Wonder right now :3c I’ve been on a huUUGE Oh Wonder kick lately!!
What do you generally carry in your bag/pockets when you go out? my wallet (w my license and money and debit card and all), travel size lotion, phone, and chap stick!!
What is one thing you are excited for? FINALLY GETTING TO COLLEGE NEXT WEEK AND STARTING CLASSES FJIODFHINBDFHBNSBO
Do you believe in ghosts? I’m gonna hesitantly say YES but I’m not 100% convinced I don’t think
What is a skill you want to learn? MAYBE THIS IS WEIRD but I think learning how to act would be kinda neat. On a more realistic note I wish I could learn to exercise without dying
Tell me a joke. I’M BAD AT JOKES DON’T DO THIS TO ME NESSIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SO YEAH THAT’S ALL FOLKS it’s 5am now...Nice..... :’) I love my ability to stay up obscenely late while also getting Nothing Done JLSDNVDHAGHVDLAK
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rosawayneisawesome · 4 years
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Riposte: Answers to the questions from Babeworld
We were SO happy with the answers to the questions. They were so insightful and beautiful – exactly what we wanted. What made them even more lovely is that neither knew what the other was writing, so it gave us a sense of intimacy and insight into how they each viewed their friendship as individuals. There were also really beautiful moments where they both describe the same event, such as moving in with each other, yet from their own perspective which creates such an interesting narrative.
Georgina’s Answers
Alright lids
I tried my very very best to hand write my answers but I have acrylic nails and joined up writing. It was hard! And I kept misspelling everything which I guess could be like hehe how authentic and cute but I deno i dont even have dyslexia I just make up spellings cos I know my iPhone will correct me. I can handwrite like a few sentences here and there cos I do like the aesthetic and my handwriting is kinda cute ngl.
Anyway
What about Ashleigh makes you feel joy?
Her tenacity.
How do you think Ashleigh has changed you as a person?
Ashleigh's effect on my personal growth as boring as it may sound has been in like, practical ways. Like teaching me where to apply for mental health help, showing how to access benefits (actually she did the whole form for me) and like taking me to my first AA meeting and holding my hand. With patience and just overall validating my addictions and illnesses she’s given me the tools to make positive changes in my life. Before we met I hadn’t really had many successful friendships having one year expiration date on close relationships before they begin to break down or require distance because I’m so mentally messed up (plot twist-ours became the latter). Relationships are tough, yeno?
What’s one of your favourite memories of Ashleigh?
This is tough because what may be surprising to people is that we’ve only known each other like a couple of years maybe less (I’m terrible with numbers so this could be a lie) but like in the grand scheme of things it’s been brief. And within that time we’ve had so many life altering experiences and relationships and artistic opportunities and traumas and episodes and living situations and laughs. So much happens. I think probably being able to watch her achieve things like a first in her degree, a place at RCA etc where we can cry happy tears at the sight of personal and professional growth.
Has your relationship evolved since you first met?
Definitely. In the beginning I feel like we thrived in codependency spending every waking moment together and sharing a bed. There was comfort in this new found friendship where there was a natural give and take. We wanted to help each other excel emotionally and academically and creatively- seeing each others potential. We were also in between turning points. For Ashleigh it was education and for me it was work. Now our relationship has grown up and matured. I’m content in that our life events won’t always align and it’s okay to explore things as individuals whilst never failing to come back together and return to that sister-like dynamic that is always there.
What were your first impressions of Ashleigh?
First impressions were weird because I was looking for a room in a houseshare where the deposit wasn't crazy and they allowed cats. I was in desperation mode and looking to impress haha. Ashleigh was my point of contact and her facebook pictures presented a mysterious and arty character. I was intimidated by her honestly. I thought she was too cool for me. Cool and well liked, seemingly without trying, and I was shy.
If you could take an attribute from Ashleigh and swap it with one of your own what would it be?
Definitely her admin skills. Anything that requires like problem solving and logic. She’s a pure wiz at adobe, can make a spreadsheet, will keep on top of emails and is productive 12 hours a day. That kind of like natural incentive to work and organise myself and others is something I was not born with. And this extends into her personal life- she has successful interpersonal relationships and life long friends and I truly believe it’s down to her ability of knowing how to compartmentalise everything as well as being a good friend/daughter/girlfriend. Me? I’d lose a friend down the side of a couch or leave my two years late smear test at the back of a bus.
If you could sing a karaoke duet with Ashleigh, what song would you choose?
Break Up Bye Bye by the Frock Destroyers to live out our cock destroyers fantasy
What is your favourite way to spend time with Ashleigh?
As nice as meetings at big institutions, hosting lectures and performing at events are- we can’t wait to get home for a maccies *ashleigh’s apple music recently played playlist plays softly in the background* discussing ideas, stories, aspirations and discourse.
What is Ashleighs hidden talent?
It is her creativity. She credits everyone’s influence but often can’t acknowledge the independent creativity that lies within her.  Within art institutions it’s easy to feel boxed off as a practical person or a conceptual thinker- it’s always logic versus creativity and sometimes we aren’t allowed to believe they can overlap. Her hidden talent is her artistic talent. Hidden from her by herself and hidden from her by the people that are supposed to shine a light on it.
Describe Ashleigh in three words
Tall, Traumatized, Gay
Ashleigh’s Answers
What’s the best thing about being friends with Georgina?
It’s rare to find a friend who you can admit your wrong-doings to and not be judged. It’s also rare to find a friend who helps you use these wrong-doings to become a better person: G is that friend.
Describe Georgina in three words
Trauma, poor and under rated.
What were your first impressions of Georgina?
This girl needs help. Nah I’m joking to be honest the first time we met it was in a weird situation - she was coming around to try and find a house for her and her son (cat) and i wanted to help a fellow poor girlTM in need so she moved straight in. She seemed standoffish and cold, but later i realised she was just overworked and underpaid. She grew on me like a weird rash, I'm pretty sure I did the same to her.
Has your relationship with Georgina evolved since you first met?
Meeting G went from us both being like “who is this bitch.” to “she’s my bitch”. From then on she’s become my art wife, best friend, carer and collaborator, and I would probably have to throw myself off a cliff if she were to cut ties. I think i see so much of myself in her, she’s become of the people i do look up to the most- in a healthy way i promise!!
what’s one of your favourite memories of Georgina?
I think when we landed our first commission and i told her and we both sat and were like ‘we got this. we can do this” emphasis on the we. Being estranged from your family and feeling no one understands you is so isolating, so to feel part of a community, even if it’s just two of you, was such a big moment for me.
how do you think Georgina has change you as a person?
Before i met Georgina I was ashamed to admit i grew up on a council block, ate pasta and sauce and wore primark trackies. She’s basically helped me embrace my authentic self (ew cringe) - but for real! Since meeting G i’ve become more politically engaged, able to express my blackness and owned my disability. She’s taught me to be unapologetically me, and for that I am forever grateful. Babeworld wouldn’t exist without her, she showed me that being an artist doesn’t have to be this firm set of middle class ideals- but rather a safe space for me to express and vocalise my feelings. She constantly uses her privilege (particularly of being white and non disabled) to stand up for me, educate others and give me the support i need to do it for myself also. I’ll come in all guns blazing if you try and be ableist to me now, and I have G to thank for that.
what about Georgina makes you feel joy?
It’s so important to have that one friend who you can just fully vent to. She is a born listener, and a born learner. She takes it upon herself to continue to educate herself about marginalised groups and find ways to support them. the world would be a better place if we had more Georginas.
what’s your favourite way to spend time with Georgina?
I would say a codeine-binge but I don’t want to glamourise prescription drugs taking so: A three course maccies with the footy on sitting nowhere near each other because we have bodily contact. The occasional awkward eye contact as we reach for the last crisp.
what is Georgina‘s hidden talent?
I’d tell you but it’s a trade secret.
if you could take an attribute from Georgina and swap it with one of your own what would it be?
Confidence. I have a weird overconfidence which i wish i could slice in half and give to her because tbh, mines excessive and hers is massively lacking. Someone who actually has as much talent as her deserves to snap her fingers like a princess.
if you could sing at karaoke duet with Georgina what song would you choose?
You don’t want me to sing trust me. Think dying cat meets teenagers during the voice breaking phase of pubity. But if you really want to hurt yourself like that it would HAVE to be The Best- Giggs. It features a scouse rapper and that accent sends me sideways.
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adambstingus · 6 years
Text
4 Ways To Enjoy Weed And Avoid A Case Of The Munchies
With the legalization of recreational marijuana in four states and counting, smoking weed is becoming increasingly more acceptable in the mainstream.
In a recent survey conducted in 2015, 58 percent of Americans say cannabis should be legal.
Go America! Weve come a long way since the days of “Reefer Madness.”
Now that having an occasional joint after work is beginning to become as normalized as having a beer when you clock out, its time to discuss the implications this may have on your ability to maintain the body and health you desire.
Its true that smoking weed alone is not going to directly lead to you putting on body fat, but there is this side effect you may have heard of.
It’s called “the munchies.
That’s right, I said it.
As much as I am pro-marijuana, I want to address the elephant in the room that for me has led to a ton of overeating.
As you may have guessed, there is some science out there explaining “the munchies.”
Some emerging research points to a specific cannabinoid called tetrahydrocannabinol (or THC), which contributes to a increased sense of smell.
This can also often lead to an increased appetite.
When youre hungry, you want to eat more. Its as simple as that.
I know there are those among us who have been smoking so long that they now claim to be immune to the appetite-increasing effects of marijuana.
This may be true, and in that case, this article is not for you.
Personally, Ive been smoking weed for over 12 years now, and regardless of how high my tolerance gets, I still feel the need to eat everything in my general vicinity.
If you fall into this category,then this article is for you.
And within this article, my main objective is to answer the age old question, How can you smoke weed and not binge eat?
Way back when I weighed almost 250 pounds,I had not yet mastered the art of smoking weed and getting (or staying) lean.
It was the same old routine.
I would tell myself I would stick to eating a certain way or working out, but once I smoked weed, I immediately came down with a severe case of the F*ck Its.”
“The F*ck Its” is a term my old college football coach introduced me to.
It’s when you are supposed to do something, but then you smoke weed and say, F*ck it, I’m going to completely disregard my previous responsibilities.”
(For me, this usually meant going to get a monster-sized quesadilla and playing Guitar Hero for three hours).
He warned us that if we smoked weed, we would be especially vulnerable to coming down with a severe case of The F*ck Its.
Then, we wouldn’t study for our tests, we’d skip classes and we wouldn’t be able play on his football team.
Anyhow, over the years, I wised up a bit and was able to manage both smoking weed and achieving success in the areas of my life I cared about most.
Then, I eventually dropped down to my maintenance weight of about 190 pounds.
My personal physical transformation was made possible in combination with my recreational weed smoking habits by applying some very simple principles I’m about to teach you.
Here are four rules to follow to prevent yourself from binge eating when you smoke weed:
1. Dont rely on willpower.
We all feel super confident in our ability to stay disciplined right up until we eat an entire bag of Double StufOreos and a carton of Ben and Jerry’s.
Dont put yourself in that position. I
nstead, just get rid of all the unhealthy foods in your house, so if you do go on a little binge, it will be on healthy food.
Personally, I just dont bring junk food in the house because I know it will be eaten about 45 minutes after I smoke.
In general, this is a smart strategy. even if you arent smoking weed.
Research tells us willpower is a finite resource that takes both mental energy and motivation.
Get rid of the temptation, and willpower is no longer needed.
2. Be prepared.
Lets face it: Youre going to eat something.
Unless you are a part of the few people who dont experience the munchies, youre going to be at risk ofexperiencing a significantly increased appetite.
Be prepared with a ton of healthy and nutritious options for food in your pantry and refrigerator.
I usually have green juices, veggies sticks, fruit, beef jerky and occasionally some low-calorie Pop Chips on hand to keep me satisfied.
3. Get your workout in early.
I personally like to smoke and then workout, but many people dont.
If you know youre likely to skip a workout if you get high, make sure you get your workout in before you indulge in smoking.
Its simple, but this needs to be mentioned, otherwise you will fall victim to the “The F*ck Its” syndrome.
This also goes for anything else important that you have on your agenda.
If you need to get something important done, dont let yourself fall into the trap of, Ill do it later.”
You probably wont, so just do it before you smoke.
4. Have clearly defined, realistic goals.
Research tells us that if you have a clearly defined, realistic goal that has been previously established, it will bemuch easier to follow through with whatyou said you wanted to do.
If you decide you are going to be eating in a calorie deficit for the next week, then you know you cannot go off the hinges when you smoke.
Youll have a set amount of calories youre supposed to eat, and you can hold yourself accountable to that.
MyFitnessPal is a great tool to use for budgeting calories.
To make this all easier for you to follow along with, weve created an infographic that you can print out and put on your fridge.
If you have any other questions on how to live green and be healthy, drop them below in the comments.
from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/4-ways-to-enjoy-weed-and-avoid-a-case-of-the-munchies/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/175417621102
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allofbeercom · 6 years
Text
4 Ways To Enjoy Weed And Avoid A Case Of The Munchies
With the legalization of recreational marijuana in four states and counting, smoking weed is becoming increasingly more acceptable in the mainstream.
In a recent survey conducted in 2015, 58 percent of Americans say cannabis should be legal.
Go America! Weve come a long way since the days of “Reefer Madness.”
Now that having an occasional joint after work is beginning to become as normalized as having a beer when you clock out, its time to discuss the implications this may have on your ability to maintain the body and health you desire.
Its true that smoking weed alone is not going to directly lead to you putting on body fat, but there is this side effect you may have heard of.
It’s called “the munchies.
That’s right, I said it.
As much as I am pro-marijuana, I want to address the elephant in the room that for me has led to a ton of overeating.
As you may have guessed, there is some science out there explaining “the munchies.”
Some emerging research points to a specific cannabinoid called tetrahydrocannabinol (or THC), which contributes to a increased sense of smell.
This can also often lead to an increased appetite.
When youre hungry, you want to eat more. Its as simple as that.
I know there are those among us who have been smoking so long that they now claim to be immune to the appetite-increasing effects of marijuana.
This may be true, and in that case, this article is not for you.
Personally, Ive been smoking weed for over 12 years now, and regardless of how high my tolerance gets, I still feel the need to eat everything in my general vicinity.
If you fall into this category,then this article is for you.
And within this article, my main objective is to answer the age old question, How can you smoke weed and not binge eat?
Way back when I weighed almost 250 pounds,I had not yet mastered the art of smoking weed and getting (or staying) lean.
It was the same old routine.
I would tell myself I would stick to eating a certain way or working out, but once I smoked weed, I immediately came down with a severe case of the F*ck Its.”
“The F*ck Its” is a term my old college football coach introduced me to.
It’s when you are supposed to do something, but then you smoke weed and say, F*ck it, I’m going to completely disregard my previous responsibilities.”
(For me, this usually meant going to get a monster-sized quesadilla and playing Guitar Hero for three hours).
He warned us that if we smoked weed, we would be especially vulnerable to coming down with a severe case of The F*ck Its.
Then, we wouldn’t study for our tests, we’d skip classes and we wouldn’t be able play on his football team.
Anyhow, over the years, I wised up a bit and was able to manage both smoking weed and achieving success in the areas of my life I cared about most.
Then, I eventually dropped down to my maintenance weight of about 190 pounds.
My personal physical transformation was made possible in combination with my recreational weed smoking habits by applying some very simple principles I’m about to teach you.
Here are four rules to follow to prevent yourself from binge eating when you smoke weed:
1. Dont rely on willpower.
We all feel super confident in our ability to stay disciplined right up until we eat an entire bag of Double StufOreos and a carton of Ben and Jerry’s.
Dont put yourself in that position. I
nstead, just get rid of all the unhealthy foods in your house, so if you do go on a little binge, it will be on healthy food.
Personally, I just dont bring junk food in the house because I know it will be eaten about 45 minutes after I smoke.
In general, this is a smart strategy. even if you arent smoking weed.
Research tells us willpower is a finite resource that takes both mental energy and motivation.
Get rid of the temptation, and willpower is no longer needed.
2. Be prepared.
Lets face it: Youre going to eat something.
Unless you are a part of the few people who dont experience the munchies, youre going to be at risk ofexperiencing a significantly increased appetite.
Be prepared with a ton of healthy and nutritious options for food in your pantry and refrigerator.
I usually have green juices, veggies sticks, fruit, beef jerky and occasionally some low-calorie Pop Chips on hand to keep me satisfied.
3. Get your workout in early.
I personally like to smoke and then workout, but many people dont.
If you know youre likely to skip a workout if you get high, make sure you get your workout in before you indulge in smoking.
Its simple, but this needs to be mentioned, otherwise you will fall victim to the “The F*ck Its” syndrome.
This also goes for anything else important that you have on your agenda.
If you need to get something important done, dont let yourself fall into the trap of, Ill do it later.”
You probably wont, so just do it before you smoke.
4. Have clearly defined, realistic goals.
Research tells us that if you have a clearly defined, realistic goal that has been previously established, it will bemuch easier to follow through with whatyou said you wanted to do.
If you decide you are going to be eating in a calorie deficit for the next week, then you know you cannot go off the hinges when you smoke.
Youll have a set amount of calories youre supposed to eat, and you can hold yourself accountable to that.
MyFitnessPal is a great tool to use for budgeting calories.
To make this all easier for you to follow along with, weve created an infographic that you can print out and put on your fridge.
If you have any other questions on how to live green and be healthy, drop them below in the comments.
from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/4-ways-to-enjoy-weed-and-avoid-a-case-of-the-munchies/
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apsbicepstraining · 7 years
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Steven Caulker:’ I’ve sat here for years hating myself … This year was almost the end’
The QPR defender talks powerfully about his strives with mental illness, his addictions to gamble and drinking and why “he il be” thankful still to be alive
Steven Caulker has a fable to tell and, as hard as it is to hear, it is best plainly to listen. His stream of consciousness veers from scoring on his England debut less than five years ago and the excite at potential being realised to the frightening mental health issues a matter that have almost terminated it all in the period since. A actor who, from the outside, emerged consecrated with endowment and opportunity speaks of frantic nervousnes and self-loathing.
He entertained killing himself in his darkest instants with his path one of self-destruction. Endeavors at escapism rate him hundreds of thousands of pounds, compensations frittered away in casinoes. Then came the drinking is targeted at numbing the sting. The 25 -year-old notes himself recalling the times spent in custody watching CCTV footage of his misdemeanours, his lawyer at his slope, and not recognising the infamous being on the screen.
Football is still coming to terms with mental illness and Caulker, an international and a last-place linger remember at Queens Park Rangers of financially misguided dates as a Premier League club, has been an easy target. He is not was striving to make excuses or acquire sympathy. These are details he knows unpleasant to narrate. Ive sat here for years hating myself and never understand why it is I couldnt only be like everybody else, he says. This time was almost the end. I seemed for large spans there was no light-footed at the end of the passageway. And yet “hes not” residence a gambling since December, or stroked alcohol since early March. The healing process that can rehabilitate him to the top level is well under way, with this interview, one he attempted out, potentially another step on the road to recovery.
A little under a year ago Caulker had spoken to the Guardian about a life-changing week spent in Sierra Leone, of humbling yet invigorating benevolence work with ActionAid that had rendered him with a sense of view. He returned to be galvanised under Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink at Loftus Road and, having invested the previous season on loan at Southampton and Liverpool unfulfilling stints which fuelled his latent dangers was ready to give his all. Early season recitals against Leeds and Cardiff indicated confidence had been rebuilt, reward for a summer of incessant fitness work.
The trigger that they are able to mail him spiralling to rock bottom would be injury. He snapped his groin at Barnsley and played in pain for weeks, dreading a incantation back in rehabilitation, before succumbing to an accompanied hip objection. I owed it to QPR to try, he says, but I was naive thinking I could still perform with the weeping. He has not played since last-place October, with the period celebrated by personal ferment and, simply of late, resurgence. Talking publicly, he advocated, may place younger participates towards seeking assist if they find themselves trampling the same itinerary, or knowing the same gumption of desertion, in a merciless industry. The real hope is the activity, as gallant as it is, may eventually prove more cathartic for Caulker himself.
He recognises his football ability as a gift but likewise a swear. It took him from Sunday League at 15 into the Premier League four years later, to the 2012 Olympics with Great Britain and into Roy Hodgsons England side for a friendly in Sweden later that year. His talent has persuaded some of the most respected directors he is worth engaging. Yet, while he could still get away with it on the pitch, he lived in denial. It was more than six years into his busines before he admitted he necessitated assist. You always think you can rein it back in again and the money plies a inaccurate sense of security. But at Southampton I realised, mentally, I was extend. I wasnt playing, my job was going nowhere and I had to reach out to someone. Medical doctors there tried to help me but others were just telling me got to go on the tone and express myself.
There was no understanding as to what was happening in my leader. I know theyd returned me in to do a job and they werent there to be babysitters. Just like at QPR, I needed to justify the money they were paying me but I was in a state and, at some place, there has to be a duty of care. Football does not deal well with mental illness. Maybe its changing but the support mechanisms are so often not there. Ive spoken to so many actors who have been told to go to the Sporting Chance clinic and theyve accepted because they know, if they take time off, theyll “losing ones” neighbourhood in the team. Someone gradations in and does well, so youre departed. That dissuades parties from getting improve. You feel obliged to get on with things.
I would urge cubs to speak to the PFA, to speak to their director, and not be scared about being stopped if they are experiencing like I did. Be brave enough to say you need improve before its too late. The feeling Id ever involved something to take the edge off. Football was my flee as a kid but that changed when I was chucked into the first team as a adolescent and abruptly football came with distres. My behavior of to address it, even in the early stages of my career, was gambling. Im an addict. Im addicted to triumphing, which people say is a positive in football but certainly not when it extends to gambling. I was addicted to trying to beat the system, because you reassure yourself there is a plan to it and you can beat it. You can never get your brain around why you arent.
Steven Caulker, here celebrating after scoring on his England debut in 2012, says his football ability is a gift but too a affliction. Photograph: Michael Regan/ Getty Images
He has played 123 ages in the Premier League and for eight teams with the same, horribly familiar hertz of insecurity and self-destruction seeking him to each. There is always a catalyst to the nosedive. The sleepless darkness, sat up till 5am replaying every bad decision Ive ever became in my life, perturbing what will be next Tottenham moved me to Bristol City on loan at 18 and they set me in a flat in the city centre surrounded by nightclubs, two casinos opposite, the various kinds of coin Id never seen in my life, and no counseling whatsoever. I was plucked formerly by a member of staff and told Id been recognized in the casino at 3am but their posture was: What you do in your free time is your business. Just dont gave it affect your acts out on the pitch.
At Swansea a year later it was an injury which created it all to the surface, and Spurs communicated me to Boasting Chance to sort myself out while I was recovering from my knee but I wasnt ready. I hadnt experienced enough agony to form me want to stop. I was gambling heavily when I went back to Tottenham, biding up to crazy hours of the darknes in casinos. I guess never feeling good enough played a big part in that. I never appeared I was on the same degree as any of the first-teamers but a big win in the casino and fund in my back pocket might change that. Being stopped sounds me even more because football was what I had relied on to make me feel better. So then the gambling was every single day. The pain of forgetting all my fund, combined with the pity and guilt, ingest away at me. So Id drink myself into oblivion so I wouldnt have to feel anything. I was numb but I was out of control.
The chairman, Daniel Levy, eventually attempted him out on a post-season trip-up to the Bahamas. He just said: The room you act is phenomenal. You either sort yourself out or lead but I can assure you, if you leave, youll be going down , not up. I was young, stupid. I took it as a challenge, a chance to prove him wrong. I was so immature. So I went to Cardiff and, for six months, everything was amazing. I was chieftain, the manager, Malky Mackay, knew I had some issues but offered to be there for me. I experienced wanted, so there was no gambling , no heavy binges but the second largest he was sacked, all the beasts came back. Thats all it took. Even before we played the next game, Id persuasion myself good-for-nothing would be the same. Thats the kind of cataclysmic envisioning Ive had to address.
Steven Caulker, here playing for Tottenham against Arsenal in 2010, says he made a big mistake leaving Spurs. Photo: Tom Jenkins for the Guardian
I pointed up at QPR that summertime, 2014, trying to hold it together, but the prompt there came in the second largest recreation when we were pummelled 4-0 at Tottenham. That detecting coming off the tone at White Hart Lane, knowing marriage been humiliated and that Levy was sitting up in the stand thinking: I told you so There was no disclaiming it any more. Id made a big mistake leaving Spurs. I should have stayed and sorted myself out. I required the ground to swallow me up. It just pounded in my psyche: dejection, unhappines, bitternes. From that instant I was run, even if I never wanted to accept it, and there is nothing that intensified. Id go for days without sleeping. I dont known better I endured it. That time was an absolute nightmare.
It was a vicious circle. Wed lose at the weekend and the love would get at me, and Id be interrupting. I really wanted to help us get results but we werent good enough and Id walk away taking responsibility in my head for the whole crews flunks. I couldnt sleep, are concerned about what had happened. The only comfort I acquired was in booze. It would silence the tones of indecision and self-hate, temporarily regardless, but Id be too intoxicated to go into teach, and the blackouts Id have no remember of anything. It could be Monday and Id have no remembrance of what had happened since Saturday night. Id wake up, roll over and look at my phone, and thered be texts from people saying: Did you really do this last-place darknes? The director want to talk to you. It was petrifying because I didnt know what had happened.
There were occasions where reference is would wake up in a police cell. He pouts when asked how often he has been arrested, upset to admit the above figures, but the drunk and disorderly offences would flare up from London to Southampton to Merseyside. Sometimes Id be sat there with law enforcement agencies and my solicitor, watching the CCTV footage of what Id done, and I didnt recognise myself. I couldnt conceive the person or persons I was. Its so hard to accept I could be like that. In Liverpool I was waking up in the middle of the nighttime throwing up, people were blackmailing me, association proprietors and bouncers: Offer money or well sell this story on you. And I had no meaning what Id even done on those blackouts. I eventually told the sorority I couldnt function and needed to go back into rehab.
Things might have improved last-place season under Hasselbaink had the hip hurt, diagnosed as a week-long edition that became a complaint which induced five different diagnosis , not interpret him powerless is again. Id expensed the organization 8m, was one of the top earners and one of the few left from the Premier League, and beings had no explanation why I wasnt acting. Why I was absent. It ended up as my toughest year ever. I couldnt learn. My girlfriend lost her mother and was grieving while living with someone struggling with craving. My son, who lives with his mother in Somerset, is still in academy so Id go months without recognizing him. He had always been my safe place. There was no release.
QPR and my agent tried to push me towards Lokomotiv Moscow in January, saying it would be a fresh start. Portion of me contemplated the money they were offering could solve all my difficulties but why would being on my own out in Russia help? I had no feeling how to separate the cycle and is available on Moscow while still disabled only appeared a recipe for disaster. The director, Ian Holloway, was actually tell people to stand. Id been in his office close to rips, so he said: How anyone could feel sending you there would be a good theme is beyond me. You need to get yourself right. I realized him for that but, for the sorority, I can see why it was appealing to be shot of me but I was in no fit district to move and eventually pulled the plug on it.
Id had one last-place gamble and lost a blaze of a lot of money in December. A last blowout. It was at that point I lastly countenanced I could not win; that there was no quick fix , no more fantasizing I could save the world through one good nighttime on the roulette wheel. It was all a fantasize that took me away from having to feel anything. I entertained suicide a lot in that stage. A dark era. Everything Id gone through in football, where had it taken me? All the remorse, the shame, the shame, the public humiliation in the working paper and for what? I could cling to my son, to what Id done in Africa, or the dimensions Id bought their own families, but Id blown everything else. I calculate Ive lost 70% what Ive payed. When “were losing” that amount of money, the guilt thats so many lives you could have changed. There was no flee , no way out, other than to leave.
Steven Caulker says: In Liverpool I was waking up in the middle of the darknes throwing up, parties were extorting me, club owneds and bouncers. Picture: Sarah Lee for the Guardian
But, in the moments of clarity, I knew I couldnt do that because of my son. I havent gambled since but the drink crowded the void for a while. I was frightened and didnt feel like there was anywhere else to transform. Rehab didnt production before so why would it work now? I stupidly took convenience in the alcohol but it objective up deepening the depression. It was relentless from every slant. Until 12 March. Thats the day I lost my “drivers licence”. Thats when I realised my life had now become unmanageable.
Caulker was ordered to pay 12,755 in penalties and costs at Slough magistrates court at the end of March and was banned from driving for 18 months, having refused to blow into a breathalyser after police were called to a parking lot near Windsor Castle. I knew I was over the limit, I knew Id get the ban but I didnt want to tell my parents Id fucked up again. What if I had driven the car out of the car park and killed someone? No, that was it. Ive been up before a adjudicate four or five times. No more second probabilities. Its a incarcerate sentence next. I was still injured and unable to play, so I signed off sick. I went to see a specialist who diagnosed me with depression and nervousnes. He prescribed me medication and we put together a design where I would take some time away to sort myself out.
He and his lover travelled to Africa and India, is contributing to orphanages, homeless shelters and academies where the bear was exposed and obvious. He has attended countless Gamblers Anonymous and Alcoholics Anonymous gathers, and has reached out to support works in video games such as Clarke Carlisle for advice. He has not touched alcohol since his arrest in March. He takes medication, a feeling stabiliser is striving to match my high-priceds and lows, and address that substance inequality which draws my practices so cataclysmic, twice a day. Golf is a new, most constructive vice.
People say Ive done all this because Ive had too much money shed at me but I know teenagers without a penny who have the same addictive characters as me. Whether I played football or not I would still be suffering from this illness, precisely without the public pressure and mortification. Addiction does not care. I am a man of extremes. Parties dont find me doing the additional training, feeing right, going to the reserve every night to get fit, were represented at the anonymous convenes, doing the donation make. That is still me. That is who I am. But I get fucked by these other demons and I desperately necessary something in the middle. I feel like Im getting there now, that things have finally changed.
Im doing interesting thing merely to prompt me to stay on track. I could be relying on taxis to get me everywhere while Im banned but Im exploiting public transport. Im living in one of the owneds I own in Feltham, back where I grew up, to stir me recollect how hard I had to work to get out of here aged 15. Its a remember that, if I continue to unravel, I wont improve my statu again. Money considers the fissures. It can be evil. It prolongs the agony.
QPRs musicians reported for pre-season last-place Friday but Caulker, who has one year to run on his contract and has been improving all summertime with the former conference player Drewe Broughton at Goals centre in Hayes, had been signed off until July. Life at the golf-club had degenerated into an incessant flow of internal disciplinary hearings and, despite Holloway having become clear his desire to retain the centre-halfs business, his future will not is currently under Loftus Road. What happens next is all a bit perplexed, all a bit uncertain, he says. The manager has texted me several times offering his support and “says hes” misses me at the club but my brand-new representative has been informed by the owners Im not welcome back.
For too long Ive disliked everything about myself and I needed to learn to affection myself again. I miss video games like crazy. I dont detect as if Ive experienced playing football since Cardiff. I dont want to type my identify into Google and just see a roster of humbling narrations. I want people to remember I am a footballer who was good enough to represent his country at 20 and still has 10 years left in the game. At 40% of my ability, I was playing at the highest level. Now I feel good mentally and I want the chance to show people, including my son, what I am absolutely capable of. Wherever the opportunity starts, Im exactly appreciative still to be alive.
In the UK, the Samaritans can be contacted on 116 123.
In the US, the National Suicide Prevention Hotline is 1-800-273-8255.
In Australia, the crisis support assistance Lifeline is on 13 11 14.
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