#but now in the same situation as an adult its easier to slow down and spread it out a bit
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katesadventureworld · 1 year ago
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    The Grinder Experience
** DISCLAIMER this blog features topics words and language that may not be suitable for under 18s adult supervision advised.**
Hey boos…  so, this was meant to be a sort of lighthearted look into the world of using Grinder and other dating apps. but recently I’ve been hit with a reminder to why so many people like myself find it hard to find dates, or struggle with there mental health…
Before we get into that let me explain Grinder! I’ve been on grinder on and off for quite a number of years now in that time I’ve made 2 friends and had to block at least 200 people…. so why is this? Well in general My experience with grinder had been full of fake profiles creepy old guys and people who want to blind date apparently. ( There profile has NO photos and they then send a dick pic as an opening… ew.) It’s an extremely frustrating app trying to find someone close by and who is genuine. (I’m also very fussy. so that doesn’t help me personally) Though on occasion there are some lovely people who pop up who just want to chat or leave a really nice complement even though they know they aren’t what I’m looking for.  But for the most half I’m bombarded with messages such as ( And these are genuine messages) “ Fuck me ur hot I’d deffo smash ur tight little pussy” “come sit on daddys lap baby ill show you a good time” or my personal dis-favorite “Wow your hot Ide deffo bend you over with my hand on your throat and fill you up with my cum then eat your ass out you want that baby “ Safe to say anyone who sends me those as opening lines get blocked instantly like WHY would you send messages like that sometimes accompanied with the worst dick pics I’ve ever seen as an opening WHO IS THIS WORKING ON! Its so distasteful and disrespectful and makes the App a vile place to be.
Before I move on to the competitors (Tinder POF Hinge and Badoo ) lets address my biggest issue with dating apps, Mainly Grinder and why this isn’t the light hearted look I wanted it to be.
You see, I identify as a “Trans woman” as this is easier to explain my situation (Please read my previous Blog “Me and Him” for more..) This can give some people easy ammo to use if I ignore them or simply don’t reply and delete there messages, it seems if you don’t reply they take it as I must try again and again and each time get a little bit more ruder, in the past I’ve been called all sorts and perhaps there is another blog in there somewhere about that, But just today as I write this post I was on grinder checking my messages and I received a message from a guy I simply didn’t reply too from 2 days ago, - I’ve been busy!  So his simple way of getting my attention and ending our chat was this. again, this Is a genuine message “ You are an arrogant man” now, Those who know me know I simply do not and will not accept any slander like this aimed at me or to anyone I know that said this hit me hard I’m already struggling with my MH at the moment although I don’t talk about it, so this comment has sent me into a spiral.  I AM NOT A MAN. IM NOT MANLY IM NOT A CROSSDRESER I AM NOT A TRANSVESTITE I AM A WOMAN.  I do constantly worry that I don’t look beautiful or feminine enough something that’s led me to hide away at home rather than go out shopping this week or do something I wanted to do which was write up some blogs in a coffee shop for a change of scene. I’ve been unable to be free due to my own thoughts getting to me so when I received this message I just wanted to try and scream at them Ironically I did reply with “WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME” and before I had a chance to get a reply or block them they had blocked me, so I guess I won without trying but this isn’t the first comment of this type I’ve got on this app, And although its slowed down a lot it still happens and it’s really not right in this day an age..
It’s only fair I now delve into the other apps I use So how do the other apps compare with grinder?
-Tinder … YAWN… same type of “Fuck boys” over and over I’m tired of swiping left! But those who I have matched with seem genuine with only one “Bott” now and again but they are so easy to figure out and block it doesn’t affect the overall experience of swiping left.. 3/10
-Badoo …. Notification central… and my god it’s a bit weird it had the same features as tinder with more options to see people and chat or send likes on their photos, but it just seems a little confusing like do people see the likes or what?? You also can’t message unless you match so what’s the point of being able to see them off the swipe feature?  So far seem like lots of genuine people on there and although I don’t think I’ll find Mr/Mrs/Them/There Right I think it’s a great place to make friends. BUT MY GOD ARE THE NOTIFICATIONS ANNOYING!  1/10
-  POF… Perhaps the most legendary app who hasn’t been on it right! Well, it seems to have died off almost completely, The old features I once enjoyed are gone, and the profiles seem to be people who forgot to delete them! shame as it could be good but they ruined it ,  1/10
- Hinge … well they say in there marketing it’s the app designed to be deleted.  YES it sure is get it in the bin its awful. You get like 5 likes a day.  There is so many tabs at the bottom that seem to do nothing to help you find someone it really is crap. 0/10 would not recommend.
And as for grinder….. Well, what can I say, its got me some attention and I’ve met up with one bad person. (currently writing that blog but its very hard to write.)  but also met up with a handful of respectable people I’ve had fun with. It’s not an app I want to use. But at the same time where would I be without it, I check it daily and nothing ever changes, 5/10 for me…  
With all of this said I am still trying to find genuine people to date but I’m so exhausted with it all. And must add that if I get ANY messages from people on grinder that do not match what I’m looking for to save the hassle of potential spam/ Hate messages I do block them straight away… maybe one day ill find an app that works or who knows meet someone who makes me want to never use them again!
Thanks for reading boos be great to know what you think of my blogs and what you experiences on apps have been I’ve been Katie-Mae Ellis and this has been a Kates adventures blog.
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likeswallowstosea · 2 years ago
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@celestialxdancers
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Sometimes, Ches couldn’t help about how much simpler all of this was when they were younger. Back when they didn’t have to worry about finding an infected free place to rest their heads, when there was some place guaranteed to go back to. Maybe she wouldn’t say they didn’t have to stress most of what they did as adults. After all, the Fields weren’t too unlike the Elswoods were, forced to grow up way too young, the crushing responsibilities of adulthood thrust upon their shoulders decades before it should have been. But, even now she couldn’t shake the thought that maybe it’d been easier knowing where they’d be able to land when the adventure was said and done - just safe enough to recoup without the intense uneasiness that sunk its teeth into her every single time they slowed down for too long. What was the end goal of all of this? They’d never be able to go back to the way things were before Effie had turned, before Elliot had gotten bit. They’d never be the same people they were before. “Do you ever think about what would happen if we settled down someplace, stayed put?” She asked. Maybe not now, honestly she wasn’t sure she could stay still that long with everything still so fresh on her mind, and knowing that somewhere Cade or Emmett were still out there. They had to be, right? There was no way she was the only Elswood left, or maybe it was just that desperation to not be alone in the universe blinding her to the reality of the situation. She twirls a strand of red hair around her fingertip, taking a deep breath. With any luck, Jamie would just keep at the question - run off with a wild joking take, or maybe a serious answer that wasn’t too heavy. “Although, could you imagine us with a farm or something? You know… you might look good in a straw hat!” A nudge in the right direction, hopefully. After all, when in doubt, a lighthearted throwaway comment never hurt!
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giorno-plays-piano · 3 years ago
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Abominable Part 1
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Pairing: mage!Peter Parker x mage!Reader
Warnings: yandere, obsession, stalking, murders, possible gore in the future chapters, pretty dark story overall.
Words: 1543
Summary: An investigator of the Mage's Association, you are sent to discover the mystery behind a series of murders before more sinister events take place.
P.S. This was inspired by The Garden of Sinners particularly. I loved it dearly when I was a teenager.
To avoid any confusion, the reader is neither good nor bad due to the nature of her profession. Peter is an adult.
____________
Stepping on a platform with a vintage Samsonite briefcase in your hand, you looked at the people standing aside, most of them waiting for other passengers to leave the train. Although you knew the face of a magus who was supposed to meet you, it was hard to recognize him in the crowd, and you stared at all those people in front of you, clenching the briefcase’s handle. You hated waiting.
Of course, Lord Pierce wasn’t too happy with your arrival: the old fool thought he was untouchable even after a series of murders and an unnatural magic activity in Tombra that got the Mage's Association alarmed. You remembered the revulsion in Mr. Stark’s voice when he talked of Alexander. The old aristocracy, Lord Pierce was an outstanding magus who had long abandoned practicing any decent magic and instead preferred to exploit the strength of his numerous successors. While he still had some friends in the Association, Stark hated him greatly and was happy to remind him who was in control.
Naturally, Pierce knew why you came to Tombra, and the conversation between you two didn’t go well. You didn’t hide your intentions: you were the Investigator of the Clock Tower, and your job was to figure out what was happening in that megalopolis where Lord Pierce resided proudly. It meant you were going to be a great disturbance and a possible danger to many aristocratic families under Alexander’s protection. 
It wasn’t surprising he chose the most useless assistant to help you find out the truth. His name was Peter Parker, and he was class D+ magus who attended neither Clock Tower nor Atlas Academy. His role was to slow you down, you thought and sighed. 
Suddenly, you saw a familiar face when a young man hurried to you, his cheeks red, sweat running down his face: apparently, he was late. You snickered, looking at his formal attire - his black tie was so long as if he stole it from his father.
Once he was close enough, the young man stood tall, at attention, waiting for you to say something as he stared at you with awe and horror.
“Lady Ragna of the Clock Tower,” you named your rank coldly, and your companion nervously bit his lower lip, acting exactly how you expected of him.
“Peter of Tombra! Pleased to make your acquaintance!” He sounded too excited, and his hands were trembling a little, although he tried hiding it.
Gods, what was he good for in a situation like this, unless he possessed some extraordinary powers not stated in his file? Well, now was the time to discover that, you thought as you narrowed your eyes at the young man.
"Your primary magecraft?"
"B-bounded fields and healing!"
Nothing spectacular there, but bounded fields could be of use to you if you would ever be attacked while performing magic.
"Elements?"
"Water and wind!"
This was better: magi controlling more than one element were still rare, and the boy could make a nice apprentice if he were to be send to the Clock Tower. Besides, with Tombra surrounded by a river, a liquid manipulation skill Peter definitely possessed could be valuable, too.
"Magic circuit composition?"
"N-normal?"
"Any familiars?"
"None."
He was clearly feeling like a mouse in front of a snake, his face getting even more red with every second, and you found the situation rather funny.
"Your motto?" You stared him dead in the eye.
For a second Peter looked horrified, his mouth slightly open as if he were to say something, but you heard no sound coming from him. Then, as if struck by lightning, he gibbered with fear, "Live p-proudly?"
Oh boy. He really thought you were being serious when you talked rubbish with a stony face. If anybody was to talk about a personal motto, even the most pretentious magi of the Clock Tower would burst out laughing.
Rolling your eyes skyward, a gleam of deviltry in them, you smirked, "It was a joke. Don't ever use a motto, it's a terrible idea."
"Thank goodness! I thought it's something high magi of Clock Tower have." The next second Peter made a sigh of relief, and then the both of you laughed loudly, making other people on the platform throw glances at you.
Although you realized the young man had much less experience than you, you still felt he would be fun to have around. If he could make your life a little easier, you would accept his help.
Moving away from the platform and soon passing through the station's hall, you went straight to the city streets instead of catching a taxi. Peter hurried after you, still perplexed at your refusal to let him carry your bag - you guessed he expected you to boss him around, and it made you chuckle. What Pierce was doing with young magi here if Peter had such an impression about higher-ups?
"Lady Ragna, I was informed that the cottage where you chose to stay is in the suburbs. Did you decide to change it?" He asked, seeing you walking to a completely different place.
"No, it's the same cottage. If you wonder why we aren't driving there right now, I'd prefer to patrol the streets tonight to get to know the city. We can discuss the details of the job in the meantime."
You walked away fast, not looking at your companion anymore and watching the night city instead: you had never been to Tombra before, but many magi from the Clock Tower were born there, and their talk about the city always made you a little jealous. Born in a small town to a simple human woman who knew nothing of magic, you always wished to know what it was like to grow up in a true magic society like the one in Tombra, a home to many noble families, albeit smaller and less significant than those living in the capital. 
The city looked exactly like you imagined it: giant grey buildings stood besides the streets, and while they didn't look particularly pretty, you loved those countless neon signages and bright posters that were shining even in the darkness of the night. The streets were busy with tourists admiring the city, couples walking out of the fancy restaurants and cinemas, and young people, recklessly snooping around some nightclubs and bars, trying to get in despite the security glaring at them and requiring them to show their ID cards while the kids pretended they forgot them. There was also a small marketplace with colorful food trucks and booths, offering both local and international cuisine, and you blended into the crowd immediately, taking some crepes and then buying takoyaki - Peter, following you like a puppy, looked shocked.
"I can't do my job on an empty stomach," you smirked and handed him some takoyaki.
Funny enough, he accepted the second you showed the plastic plate into his hands, eating so hungrily as if he had been starving the whole day.
"Well, now since I feel a bit better, let's talk business," you motioned the young man to follow you, and turned to a narrow alley, leaving the noisy market that was going to be full of people for at least a couple of hours more. "Do you have any idea why I have been sent by the Association?"
Licking his fingers, Peter looked somewhat shyly at you, probably afraid he would say something silly, "From what I understand, the reason is some unnatural magic activity the Association couldn't trace, and the involvement of its user in several murders."
"Correct." Crossing the alley, you scratched the chipped paint from an old building in front of you and looked at your fingers, furrowing your brows. "To be precise, the reason why the Association didn't leave these murders to a human police is the method how these murders were carried on. Whoever did it pretty much sucked the soul out of victims' bodies."
Peter frowned, staying still while you kept examining the concrete wall in front of you, drawing strange symbols that started glowing immediately as you finished them.
"It may sounds funny, but the ritual necessary to prevent the soul of a dead person to come back to Akasha is known only to a couple of magi, and each of them is considered a great danger to the society by the Association. This alone is a threat, but Mr. Stark's other concern is the indefinite nature of magic practiced in Tombra. It is likely that the magus responsible for the deaths is planning something much more sinister, and we can't allow this to happen."
Finding what you were looking for, you nodded to yourself and moved further, Peter walking right beside you with a concerned expression on his face. He was probably surprised you didn't need his guidance, but you spent the last three days memorizing Tombra's map.
"Do you mean that the souls of victims can be combined to become a power source for some... dark ritual or something?" He asked nervously, licking his lips.
You smirked, turning to him and pointing to the wall of the next building that started to glow subtly as you got close, "Exactly, Peter."
__________
Tags: @finleyjayne @alexakeyloveloki   ​@helenaeisenhower @villanellevi @hurricanerin @inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @navegandoaciegas @rosalynshields @sllooney @angrythingstarlight @lookiamtrying @buckysbunny @soleil-dor @stargazingfangirl18 @dillybuggg @literate-lamb @cosicas-cuquis @sarge-barnes-sir @buckybarnesplumwhore @jaysayey @megzdoodle @gotnofucks @lux-ravenwolf @ximebebx @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @sourpatchspinster @biiskuitx
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blush-and-books · 3 years ago
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sun's gone // but you always liked this time of day
angsty, hurt/comfort with a happy ending, juke canonverse. title from Place In Me by Luke Hemmings. special shoutout to my dear @unsaid-emily who loves this lyric as much as i do.
warnings: luke is just going through a lot and its scientifically proven that anger destroys brain cells so just be ready
----
Finding out that Rose's death day was on the same day as his mom's birthday was... Not easy, for Luke.
Him and Julie both mourning different things. Both of them felt different things surrounding their mom situations, and Luke knew that his job as Julie's "Luke" was to be there for her. He had been there for Reggie when his dad was leaving home every night to go sleep wherever his mom wasn't, and when Alex's parents turned into apathetic losers post-coming out.
He should be a master at all of this parent shit.
Unfortunately, there's a difference between losing love for or from your parents, and losing that parent to a force out of your control. Luke was used to the tension that was easy to complain about; to criticizing what his friends' families were doing wrong.
From how Julie talks about her, it doesn't sound like Rose Molina was doing anything wrong.
He can't help the way that rage smolders in a deep pit of his stomach. He hates that Julie's sad, and he hates that he didn't have a mom like Rose Molina, and he hates that the universe was cruel enough to give his favorite person such a wonderful mother and take her away before Julie was even an adult.
Sometimes, especially today, he's reminded of the hate he felt for his mom. When he was fifteen and wrote her a real song, one of his first when he started to improve his writing skills, and he could see the twitch in her eye of disdain.
That night, she told him to start looking at jobs. He was old enough, after all.
He went to the closest place he could find - a local diner - picked up an application, and cried.
She didn't care about his art; she didn't realize how his art meant more than anything he could buy with money. What was starting to sting was the fact that she probably would never care. And as he got older, she made it increasingly clear, and...
Yeah. Emily's birthdays were bitter.
Luke was bitter.
Julie was depressed.
He went to see her that day, it was a Saturday, and tried to talk to her. His hand softly ran up and down her side as she curled under the comforter, and when she invited him under the blankets he gratefully accepted the invitation.
Maybe Julie, the girl that made them whole again, could heal this little extra wound, too.
They talk. Julie cries; he avoids it.
"It's just really hard to be without her, you know? Sometimes shit just happens and it feels like a time she needs to be here, and she's not, and I don't know what to do."
Luke misses feeling like that. But it stopped about a month after he left home.
"Well, I mean, I've gone this long without a mom, and I'm fine. You can live without her. You're gonna be fine."
He says it with the same apathetic tone he always uses when he shifts into Emily-mode, and it isn't supposed to be like that, but it is.
Painfully.
And his mistake is obvious when Julie's frowning lips part open in horror, and her eyes are welling fresh with tears that illuminate the red around her irises.
Carelessly, with his eyes wide open, he's torn her apart.
Under the comforter, he feels cold. Even Julie's body next to him feels cold, and-
"Julie-"
"Get out. Please."
"I'm sor-"
"Luke, please- Leave me alone."
When Luke finally sobs, he's alone. It's dark outside and the garage is empty because the boys respect that it's a rough day for many people in this household, but the sadness and anger overcome him until he's opening his mouth to scream and nothing comes out, and when he's so dehydrated that his body is void of any tears, he sits on the couch with a damp face and plucks the chords of Emily's birthday song from 27 years ago.
He tries not to feel the numbing depression very often. But you can only push down such strong emotions for so long before they choose to ignore your fighting attempts.
Julie made it easier to battle the fury he felt towards his mom. That woman will always have a grasp on him, a place in him - probably because he never properly processed it. He's stuck with all of it now. The internal playlists of songs that remind him of how mad he is or sad he is, for him to listen to whenever his temper towards Emily seethes.
Tonight, he doesn't have a choice but to face it.
----
The next morning, there's a note for him.
Please give me the day to myself.
No author claims their identity, but the loopy "y" is a dead giveaway that Julie wrote it, let alone the content. His chest does that shitty thing where his ribs feel as though they are compressing against his lungs and breathing is hard.
He feels like that all day, but he still waits.
But he barely makes it to sunset before he is poofing to the hallway and standing before her bedroom, fist raised to knock.
The sunset was pretty tonight. He hopes she enjoyed it. Her favorite time of day is dusk, when the air only feels fresher because it carries a chill with it, and the world begins to slow down.
Luke knocks.
Julie answers.
"I'm sorry," he rushes out before she has the chance to interrupt or he has the chance to say something stupid. "What I said- That was my stupid, stupid anger at my mom. It was her birthday yesterday." Julie looks surprised to hear this, of course she didn't know, but she doesn't say anything.
"I don't know what it's like to go through what you did. I wanted to support you yesterday, and I didn't, and I know that. My feelings got the better of me, and that isn't fair. And I am so, so sorry, Julie."
She remains still in front of him, but only for a beat. Eventually, she moves aside, wordlessly, and stares at him expectantly.
He takes exactly four steps inside, and plants his feet once again.
"It's not stupid," is the first thing she says. Her voice has a piercing edge to it that he rarely hears, and he hates it, but stays quiet. "How you feel about your mom. Don't call it stupid. I don't think it's stupid."
She takes a deep breath. A tear slips through her lashes.
"But what you said was really fucking insensitive. All I needed from you was to be there and hold me and let me ride this wave, not try to relate or compare our problems. How would you feel if I tried to guilt you for running away because 'at least you had a mom'?"
Shitty. He'd feel shitty, because they are two different situations and she has no right to speak on something that she hasn't gone through.
He answers with that, verbatim. And he throws in another apology for good measure, making it clear that he understands where he went wrong.
"Good. You understand. Thank you."
Her eyebrows twist together. It's a tell that she wants to say something too.
"If you ever need to talk about your mom, you know I'm here for it. I didn't know her birthday was yesterday."
Understanding, he nods. He didn't tell her it was Emily's birthday, because the day was supposed to be about Rose, and then it wasn't.
"Thank you."
The two of them fall silent.
Luke doesn't want to leave, but feels like he should; Julie hasn't asked him to leave, but he doubts she wants him to stay.
They're just two kids with gaps in their hearts, left by the absence of their mothers.
Sometimes - all the time - Luke feels Julie filling that gap. Not as a mom, of course, but as another person; someone to love him and support him and make him happy.
Emily might not ever go away in his head. But Julie Molina, over anyone, will always have a place in his heart, in his head, and in his soul.
She's just magic like that.
So magic that she finds it in herself to step forward, and he is roped in by her gravitational pull, and they're falling into each other's arms.
Luke imagines that if he ever went to a heaven instead of coming back to the modern day, that this, Julie's arms around him, is the feeling that would greet him at that end.
Everything feels better here.
----
tags: @bluefirewrites @lydias--stiles @sylphrenas @wlwcarries @ruzek-halstead @willexx @sirena-de-lunas @babydagger28 @phantomsandsunsets
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dennou-translations · 4 years ago
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Violet Evergarden Ever After: Chapter 3
Please feel free to message me about possible corrections. If you can, consider supporting the creators by purchasing the official releases. In case anyone is feeling generous: Ko-fi | PayPal. ( ╹◡╹)っ’・*
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No one would imagine that a single drop could be the start of something so big. However, it would earn itself great meaning after a while passed. Should it continue pouring, it could also summon boundless blessings and curses.
Love was almost like rain.
   The Journey and the Auto-Memories Doll
   That one was a rain of betrayal.
It started with a calm morning, the sky unfolding without any hints of being enshrouded in dark clouds. Regardless, it did not take too long for the capricious rain brought by the heavens to turn into a downpour rarely seen in recent years.
There was no longer any sign of the rain that had started to fall like gentle kisses from paradise on the black hats of gentlemen walking around town, over the backs of cats dozing under the sun or onto the cheeks of children who opened their mouths and burst into laughter. The current season was the end of summer, and it was raining for the first in a long while in Leidenschaftlich, where the skies were constantly clear in summer, but had the god that controlled weather gone crazy? With time, as if a bucket had turned over, the city was hit by a flood.
This story is about an uneventful day, which did nothing but pass, in the lives of people who worked at a certain postal company.
   The rain and wind struck the entire building as if attacking it. The doorbell rang loudly because of this, a man standing in place and staring at it with unease.
Creak-creak, the door moved. Ring-ring, the bell resounded. Since it was ringing despite there being no customers, he had become concerned and found himself coming down from his residence in the top floor.
In the previous year, the building had been shot with rocket artillery, and not only had it earned an enormous hole but a fire had also occurred – however, thanks to the quick skills of workmen, the hole was now closed and the walls had been neatly rebuilt.
The man was a stylish redhead. He was the president of this company, which he had named after himself.
Claudia Hodgins had been left all alone in the empty postal office. Still, it was normal for him to be there, as it was both his home and workplace. However, since he was by himself at a time that would usually still be within business hours, no matter what, he looked like he had been abandoned.
The postal office had been in great turmoil because of the storm. Surely, so had its peers. With the deliveries stagnated, complaints were coming from the clients. Nevertheless, the transportation was not carried out by machines devoid of feelings. It was something done by humans, who had been given birth to by someone and who had families waiting for them when they returned home. In lieu of the unpreceded disaster, as the president, he had notified all employees that business would be closed for today.
To begin with, the customers had stopped coming in the middle of the day. If he had to say so himself, this might be the expected. Deliberately going outside amidst such strong wind and torrential rain was an act of sheer madness.
Curious about what was going on outside, Hodgins had approached the entrance from the side. He felt like attempting to open the large doors just a little. He wanted to see how inundated the ground was. Just when he slow and carefully reached a hand towards it, the door opened with force despite him not doing anything.
“Ow...!”
“Oh, my bad. More importantly, we’re screwed; it’s just impossible, Old Man!”
Hodgins was teary-eyed as his precious nose took a hit. He was lightheaded for an instant due to the pain, but soon regained consciousness. After all, one of his employees had come back dripping-wet. Hodgins pulled him – whole body wrapped in rain gear – by the arm, bringing him inside and closing the door. Although it was only open for a few seconds, the entrance was already drenched.
The visitor took off the hood over his head, allowing his face to be seen. He was a splendidly handsome and fine man of sky-blue eyes and sandy-blond hair.
“Benedict...!”
Benedict Blue. One of the postal company’s postmen, who had been working in it ever since its founding.
“It’s impossible – actually, it’s absurd! Working under this rain is absurd! I look like I’m in the bath already. I wouldn’t have come here if I weren’t soaked... Making the staff pull out was the right choice,” Benedict said as if angry-yelling, shaking his head in the same way that a dog or cat would and splattering water splashes at Hodgins.
This wetted most of Hodgins’s shirt and face, but he was unable to reprimand his employee, who had been doing strenuous effort. He accepted it in resignation, wiping Benedict’s face with the sleeve of his shirt. “Okay, stay put.”
“Uoh, what’s with you? Stop.”
“Welcome home. I was worried. Good thing you’re all right.”
“O-Oh. What, hum... I’m back... You were worried about me?”
“Of course,” Hodgins said, to which Benedict turned away with an obviously embarrassed attitude after a moment of bewilderment.
Outside, vases and planters that may have been at the eaves of people’s houses, as well as shop signs, had been turning into weapons for a while now, dancing around the city along with the wind. Managing to come back unharmed and safely amidst this weather, where one could not know what would come flying their way, was something to be happy about.
“I’m just fine. This job’s easier than running around shooting guns. Anyway, I was left with the letters and packages of a guy who fell from his motorcycle and came back by myself. Was best to do that, right?”
“Aah, so someone got hurt?”
“That newbie, Clark. But he only scrapped his knees. He fell lots of times when he was learning how to ride, but for real, it’s surprisingly depressing when you fall off other than during practice. He was crying, y’see.”
“Aah~.”
Knowing who the person in question was, Hodgins pitied him. He was the youngest postman to join the company as of late. It was difficult to find human resources for postmen as they were quick to quit.
“He’s young, after all...”
“You call him young but... he’s already a grown man. I wonder if he ain’t lying to us about his age... I thought he was a baby or something.”
“You can’t compare him to a city boy fresh from the battlefield like yourself. I’m gonna get you a towel and a change of clothes now, so don’t move from there.”
“Why?”
“You’d wet the floor. Don’t tell me to go around cleaning up where you walked.”
“Clean it up,” he said while laughing, to which Hodgins’s shoulders slumped. He was a reliable companion, but also a young man who knew not how to show respect for his elders.
——Well, guess I’m a so-called doting parent for thinking that’s cute – no, doting boss.
Anyhow, they needed towels, Hodgins thought as he went back to his room. He grabbed a few large towels and held a pair of trousers and shirt that Benedict would apparently fit into under his arm. Then returned to the ground floor. By the time he did so, the number of people had increased.
“Uwah... Amazing, it’s like squeezing a rag.”
There were three more other than Benedict. If they were to be separated by types, one of them had evacuated after receiving a report of work, one had evacuated after finishing work, and one had been ordered to clock out, but all had come back halfway through, as their bodies were about to be blown off by the overwhelming storm.
“Please stop.” There was Violet Evergarden, whose golden hair was in Benedict’s grasp.
“Why? You said your hair was wet.”
“You just want to touch Violet’s hair, Benedict. Isn’t that right?” Lux Sibyl, who had given up on wiping her glasses and was glaring at the empty space.
“That’s not it. Don’t say weird stuff, Lux.”
“You knooow, my hair’s just as long as Violet’s.” And Cattleya Baudelaire, who scowled at Benedict with her arms crossed.
The members who had been there ever since the founding were Violet, Cattleya and Benedict, but Lux, having joined midway, was now a skillful secretary who covered up the schedule of the employees and president and moved them around like chess pieces. As the four people whose ages were close to each other’s came together, the conversation naturally livened up.
“You—You’re that kinda thing. If I touch you in a place like this, it’d be that kinda thing. This is our workplace, so there’s all that kinda thing. Morally speaking, it’s that kinda thing.”
“What do you mean ‘morally speaking’?!”
“I wish you wouldn’t say those things even if you think about them. Right, Violet?”
“‘Public morals’...? Benedict, what am I from your point of view?”
“V, you’re like a little sister to me... Aah, Old Man, gimme another towel.”
It was a terribly joyful thing that the company’s young aces had returned to it safe and sound.
“Everyone, don’t move from that spot no matter what. Hey, Cattleya! Don’t move!”
However, wiping all the water off the bodies of those four turned out to be a bone-breaking work.
   Out of kindness, Hodgins invited the four people who had gathered up at the postal company to his residence in the top floor.
The whole floor was his apartment, thus it was quite large. A family of five could live comfortably in it. The furnishings were arranged in wooden items and serene shades of dark brown and green. It was a relaxed, adult atmosphere, where was nothing particularly funny. It had a faint scent of the perfume that Hodgins always wore.
The invited four let out sighs of relief. The biggest reason for it, although there was also the fact that this was Hodgins’s apartment, was that they were able to escape the horrible situation outdoors. With the exception of Lux, three of them were tough enough to take part in the act of physically crushing other postal companies, but human beings could not win against natural disasters.
“Hey, what do we do? We can’t go home anymore, can we?”
“There’s nothing we can do. We got no choice but stay in Old Man’s place.”
“First time something like this happens, huh. But we’re all together, so... might be imprudent of me to say this, but... it’s a bit fun. Violet, are you worried about your home?”
“Yes, about the flowerbeds.”
“You should say ‘about the people back home’, V.”
“The two went on a trip, so they are away. I promised that I would take care of the flowers in their absence, which is why... I am worried about the flowerbeds. Besides, if that house were to be destroyed by this storm, this place would meet its end much sooner... We have little time left to live.”
“Don’t go from talking about your family to destroying the company, Little Violet. Hey, hey, everyone, you’ll catch a cold so get changed first. Put the towels in the laundry basket. Benedict, don’t throw the towels wherever!”
As told by Hodgins, the employees firstly decided to change their clothes.
Violet and Cattleya had just returned from a work trip of two days and one night, thus they had a change of nightclothes in their bags, but Benedict and Lux did not. Although there was a height difference between them, Hodgins had no issues with lending clothes to Benedict, who was also a man, but there was a need for careful selection when it came to Lux.
“Shirt... shirt, shirt; all I have is shirts.”
“Hum, President, I’m fine with anything.”
“Eeh... that okay?”
As a result, the boy and girl came into the scene wearing baggy clothes. Benedict looked almost the same as when he and Hodgins first met. When he was left to chance completely naked in a desert, he had borrowed a shirt and trousers just as he was doing now. He seemed pleased with it, however...
“Feels kinda naughty...”
...the problem was Lux.
“Benedict’s fine, but maybe it won’t do for Little Lux? Is this okay?” Hodgins asked everyone with a meek face.
They all had at last settled down, each seated in a place of their preference while sipping tea. The employees were relaxing as if they were in their own homes. Contrary to the peaceful state of the situation inside, there was still a sound of rain hitting the windows and a troubled noise of something colliding against the building outside.
“What is ‘okay’ supposed to mean?” Sitting on the sofa, Violet tilted her head. Being comfortably dressed in a dusty-pink nightwear gave her usually disciplined self a slightly soft and gentle air.
“Little Violet.”
“Yes.”
“Your nightgown is cute, huh.”
“The people from the household bought it for me. Well, what is ‘okay’ supposed to mean? Was there any problem?”
“Little Lux’s clothes.”
For whatever reason, they had the person in question standing in the center of the room. With everyone’s eyes on her, she seemed uneasy.
“Hum... why do I have to stand in the middle?”
“Little Lux, stay like that and don’t move.”
“All right.”
“What is wrong with Lux’s look? You mean to say it lacks adornment?”
“Why would that be the case, Little Violet?”
“You are the one who chooses attires for us Dolls and you have particularities regarding the clothing and accessories, so I concluded that you might deem the plain shirt as not enough.”
“No, no.” Hodgins flailed both hands. The things he was saying had a moral value to them, out of fear that her outfit was perhaps vulgar.
Benedict had dealt with it by securing her trousers with a belt, but as Lux had too thin a waist, the outcome was the belt falling off. In short, she was not wearing pants. Inevitably, she was dressed in nothing but a shirt. However, her short stature fortunately made it look like a shirt-dress.
As Hodgins explained his concern, everyone said, “I see.”
Showered with their stares more and more, Lux began to blush.
“It gives off a dangerous feeling when you think she ain’t wearing any, but on second thought, isn’t that the same for skirts? There’s actually an open hole in them, but it’s not visible, so they’re classified as clothes. No big deal, is it?” Benedict had been standing with his back against the wall just a moment ago, yet had suddenly drawn close to her and started examining her fixatedly.
“Don’t say ‘not wearing any’!”
“Well, I mean, you really ain’t wearing any... but that’s okay. No biggie. You’re probably not an option for Old Man, so no worries. Right?”
“That’s rude!”
“I’m saying you don’t need to worry about that kinda thing... Should I take mine off, then? I see; I’m fine with it. I’ll be the same as you. That all right? I’m gonna take it off.”
“Stop, stop, stop!” As Benedict put a hand to his belt while laughing, Lux repeatedly hit his chest with her fists to stop him. Lux was red up to her ears. “I can’t take this anymore! Violet! Take Benedict to over there!”
“Understood.”
“Owowowow, V, ouch, that’s not it; it was the Old Man who said weird stuff first. We’re friends, so I was showing that she doesn’t have to get hung up over something like...”
Caught in Violet’s arms, Benedict obediently sat on the sofa. Perhaps in order not to allow him to escape, she gripped his hands and sat next to him.
Cattleya cut through the silence, “The tea is delicious.” She was scattered over the bed. She must have been tired from returning from the Doll business trip. Her eyes were downcast. She might be sleepy.
“Cattleya, do you not have any comments to make? I want to hear lots of opinions.”
“Eeeh, me?” Cattleya joined the needless debate as if it were a bother. “Hmmm... if someone were making her wear this because it’s their taste, it’d be gross indeed, but there’s no other clothes for her... It’d also be horrible to leave her with just a towel wrap, so I think it’s valid. Speaking of which, President...”
“Hm?”
“You’re saying that even though you pick open-chested clothes for my Doll outfits? And the times you were choosing Doll attires for me, y’knooow, you were never so considerate to say ‘not this, not this either’ when discussing it with the people from the made-to-order store...”
Her manner of speech was somewhat thorny, but Hodgins did not make much out of it. “That’s because they look good on you.” Rather, he said decisively, with an earnest gaze and excessive confidence, “Because they look good on you. Is my judgement wrong?”
“E-Eh?” Being replied to so unapologetically, Cattleya’s reasoning jumbled up, to the point she found herself wondering if she was the one in the wrong.
The Doll outfit that Cattleya usually wore was composed mainly of a crimson dress-coat, so there was no mistaking that one could not wear it unless the person was remarkably stylish. In addition, there was also no doubt that it was lascivious. Whoever looked at her would find their line of sight momentarily going to her chest. Still, whoever looked at her would remember the woman named Cattleya Baudelaire at once.
“No... it’s not like your choices are wrong... but I only forgive you because you’re the boss. I was shocked when you first showed me that outfit! I didn’t use to wear something like that before.”
“Well, but y’see, an hourglass-shaped person looks more slender when the area around their collarbone is exposed, and it’s pretty.”
An evident question mark floated above Violet’s head at the unfamiliar word. Benedict pointed a finger at the tea set arranged on the nearby table. An hourglass used to measure the time it took to steam the tealeaves was lying there. Perhaps finding the similarity between it and a plump chest and dainty hips, Violet nodded as if convinced.
“You’ve got an hourglass-shaped figure with that slim waist, so I gave you a coat-dress that puts this on display. You can adjust it with the ribbon, so it’s not a pain, right? It has a wonderful line in mathematical terms, y’know? Plus, you also have a cheerful character, so it doesn’t look vulgar. That’s important. It means that outfit takes into consideration even the personality of the one wearing it. And the owner of that made-to-order store is famous not just in this country but abroad. The outfits of our Dolls are on a whole different level in comparison to other companies, aren’t they?”
“Y-Yeah.”
“I don’t want to bring this up, but they’re very expensive.”
“Eh, I’m sorry. S-Should I pay you back? Either that or you can dock my salary...”
“No, you’re my Doll, after all. Nobody waters a flower to get money off it, right? It’s fine, Cattleya. Just stay pretty. It’s exactly because I have obsessions over clothes that I don’t want to make a girl look vulgar. And it’s exactly because I like girls that I want to have them shine wonderfully. That’s also why I have a few complaints about Little Lux’s usual plain clothes, though...”
“I don’t know why you decided to run a mail service, President, but I accept that passion of yours. I’ll wear those clothes with care. But, President, I’m doing my best, so I want a new outfit. A cute one.”
Listening to the conversation of the two in silence, perhaps tired of going along with her superior, Lux looked at Violet and Benedict’s direction with a gaze that quietly asked for help. There was a gap on the sofa that seemed enough for one person to sit. Having locked eyes with her, Violet told Benedict to scoot over after a brief moment and patted the open spot. Lux sat next to them, looking happy.
“Violet, what’re you drinking?” Lux peeked at the teacup that Violet was holding.
“I wonder. I took the tealeaves that were in the kitchen. I do not know what type of tea it is.”
“Darjeeling.”
“Benedict, how did you know?”
“‘Cause that guy likes Darjeeling. All the tea cans he has are nothing but that.”
“Guess I’m gonna drink that too; my body got cold from the long time under the rain.”
“Heeey, the three of you who ended the talk before we noticed! Listen to what I have to say.” Hodgins put his hands on his hips, pretending to be angry.
“We were deviating from the main subject. We deemed that it was not a necessary conversation and took action prioritizing Lux’s rest,” Violet expressed with a clear voice tone.
“Besides, this talk’s about bedroom wear, ain’t it?” Benedict added a two-fold retort. The blond, blue-eyed duo that looked like siblings stared at Hodgins with questioning eyes.
“Ugh, I comply with you two no matter what you say when you both look at me at the same time, so cut it out. But I’m not giving up. I think she needs one more article of clothing.”
“Hum... President, I’m okay with this. I’m already thankful that I could borrow your clothes. Besides, when you make such a big fuss about it, things that weren’t lewd in the first place start to seem lewd, so to say,” Lux said, wanting to end this topic as fast as possible.
“The solution has come to me. Wouldn’t it be best if I took the shirt and trousers and had Lux wear this nightgown?”
However, Violet wound up rewinding it.
——Violet!
Lux hit Violet repeatedly in her mind.
“Ah~, that’s right. If that’s the case, I can do it too. But maybe my nightgown is too big? It’s a negligee just like Violet’s. The shoulder length might be the problem for this one...”
“Old Man, you gonna die if you don’t obsess over the stuff we wear? You ain’t. Give up.”
“No way. Days like this one don’t come by. All five of us are trapped in the company and we can’t get out. You’ve got no choice but stay here in my house, right? We’re having the best of parties, a pajama party. I want it to be a good one. But I can’t enjoy it when I’m worrying over Little Lux’s clothes.”
Benedict contemplated a reply to Hodgins’s words for a few seconds, but soon stopped. He was probably tired. He looked Violet’s way and asked, “Hey, you not hungry? I’m gonna take a look at the kitchen.
“Hey, don’t ignore me.” As Benedict stood up, Hodgins chased after him.
“Benedict’s gonna make something? Yay! You guys probably don’t know this, but he’s good at cooking.” Cattleya lined up behind them.
“I didn’t say I was gonna make anything, though... Well, if you’re hungry, I can do it.”
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“I shall assist you.” Violet raised her arms, rolling up her sleeves. Her prosthetics made a creaking noise.
“V, you can cook?”
“To some extent. In the military, I used to make preparations for the cooking. Mrs. Evergarden... Lady Tiffany also trained me on it.
“M-Me too... I can peel the potatoes, and stuff.” Lux hastily went after everyone. In a trail, a big move to the kitchen began to take place.
“Lux. You don’t usually cook, do you? I can already tell by just that statement. I’ll teach you.”
“Most things get solved just by peeling the potatoes... Benedict, you’re making fun of me, aren’t you?”
“Am not, Potato Demigod.”
“Violet, Benedict insulted me!”
“Benedict.”
“Owowow! V—! Don’t poke my sides! A hit from those crazy-ass prosthetics of yours ain’t no cutesy way to poke anyone! It just hurts like it normally would!”
In the end, Hodgins was able to find a light feather-print sweater in his closet and gave it to Lux. As she put it on, with her short stature, its length became the same as that of a long cardigan, which Hodgins was awfully pleased with for how adorable it was.
   The madder-red sky was not visible at dusk, the outside morphing into evening with no changes in the rainy weather.
Benedict made a soup at random with the vegetables available in Hodgins’s kitchen, which had seasonings in abundance, while Violet and Cattleya supplied it with cookies that they had brought back as souvenirs from their ghostwriting business trip. Lux brought over small candy marbles that she kept stored in her desk at the company, and Benedict, instructed by Hodgins, reluctantly took an expensive bottle hidden on the liquor shelf of the latter’s room.
“Hey, let’s rummage through the desks of everyone in the company. There are probably gonna be other ingredients in them.”
“If it’s Mr. Anthony’s desk, I think there’s definitely something in it. Mr. Anthony always gives me sweets... We’re in a state of emergency so I’m sure he’ll forgive us for it.”
“There were sweets in the reception guys’ desks. Would they get mad if we took them?”
“Definitely seem like they would. But this sweet... is one of the tasty ones... I wanna eat it.”
Lux, who was still growing, and Benedict, who had missed lunch and did not have enough with just the vegetable soup, procured more food. The sweets that the hungry thieves sneaked from the company employees’ desks turned out as what could be considered a big catch, and so, the five people trapped inside during a day of usual rain commenced a night party.
The five of different ages, genders and positions were already at a state where they could be deemed as a single family through the many incidents they had overcome and the time they had spent together. They laughed a lot, talked a lot.
“You remember when Violet brought Lux over? She went to negotiate it directly with Old Man with so much might, like, ‘I have picked up a puppy. Please give me permission to raise it here. Now, hurry’. They were holding hands and she wouldn’t let go of Lux, explaining the situation all at length as if to say she wasn’t gonna move until he gave the permission. The way Old Man acted so suspicious back then was a real blast.”
“I remember~! He was like, ‘Eh, “demigod”? Eh, “abduction and confinement”? Have you told the military police about that?’... President was so troubled, walking in circles around the two. It was the funniest thing of that year.”
“Hum... I’m sorry.”
“No, no, don’t apologize, Little Lux. You’re our main player now, so you did what you could to get where you are. You really exerted yourself in this unfamiliar land. Work for us forever, ‘kay? Rather, for me. Little Violet does some unbelievable stuff sometimes, but she generally doesn’t do anything wrong, so back then, her first-time deed shook up even someone like me, with plenty of life experience. Saying no didn’t even cross my mind.”
“I knew that President Hodgins would give you a generous treatment. If I had not concluded so, I would not have done such a thing. Thank you very much for that time, President.”
“Little Violet... Little Violet’s all grown up too, huh; you’ve become a wonderful lady...”
“Well, she’s got you as her example of guardian figure, after all.”
“I was raised by both Benedict and President Hodgins. You are my examples.”
“Eh, so I’m Old Man’s son...? Gimme the whole company.”
“No way! Actually, you’re taking a part of the company in the future, so that much should be fine, right?”
“You were serious about that? If you split the company...”
“Yeah, I’ll be the vice-president. V, call me Vice-President Benedict.”
“Benedict will be... the vice-president?”
“Violet, you haven’t been to the company too often because of work, right? I’ll stay as President Hodgins’s secretary, but some of the employees will go to Benedict’s side. That’s gonna be pretty lonely... Still, the company will be built inside the country, so it’ll be close in terms of distance. But it won’t be the same building anymore.”
“Other people... will also be gone.”
“Did I tell you that my role’s gonna change too?”
“I have not heard about that.”
“I’ll be transferred to training the newcomers. Violet, you’ll stay as you are. Well, between you and me, if we were to debate on which one should be the instructor, it’d have to be me. I’m good at looking after others.”
“Cattleya will be... an instructor...”
“I’ll be here like always. The Doll department that Little Violet and the others are in will stay in the main office and you’re largely in charge of the numbers in our Doll department, so your role won’t change.”
“Sounds like I don’t make money when you put it like that.”
“No, it’s not like that... I’ve been keeping the right people in the right places since long ago, right? I asked you to do this because I thought you could be everyone’s big sis. Besides, wasn’t it you, Cattleya, who immediately replied that you’d to it when I said your pay would increase if you became an instructor?”
“Well, that’s because I don’t know how long I could keep on being a Doll. It’s a job you can do even when you get older, but walking up mountains has been hard lately. Probably because of my high heels.”
They truly laughed a lot and talked a lot.
In their feel-at-home looks, they played card games, discussed memories of their trips and laughed holding their stomachs at silly stories. The night went on and on and the heavy rain outside gradually subsided, but no one said, “Let’s go home, then”. Days like these were a rarity. They all knew this much.
“I’m having lots of fun today. It’d be great if it were always like this.” The words that Cattleya muttered with a big smile spoke for everyone’s feelings.
Whenever a fun feast reached its climax, the loneliness towards the fact that it was going to end would cross the corners of people’s heads. That applied not only to this day that God had granted them but also to matters in the long run.
Perhaps the company named CH Postal Company itself could also be considered a feast to the people gathered in it. “May this dream, this fun time go on forever,” they wished.
The dream had begun with Claudia Hodgins. He then picked up Cattleya Baudelaire, Benedict Blue and Violet Evergarden.
“Make sure to just lick it. So, how’s that?”
They had built the company office building in Leidenschaftlich and started it together. As the postal business was a privatized one and the competitors were many, nobody could predict at first for how long this company would continue to exist.
“This stings.”
A local customer then came, earning them a large-scale contract in the delivery business.
“Eh~, you okay, Violet? You’re better off as someone who can’t drink...”
Their Auto-Memories Doll activities began to stand out.
“But everyone is changing.”
“Doesn’t that have nothing to do with drinking alcohol? I drink ‘cause I like it. If you don’t, then stop.”
“That’s right, Violet.”
“No... Major has a taste for drinking during meals, so I had been thinking of learning to do it one day as well. You are all changing one after another whenever I blink. I have started eating with other people quite often at work as well. I, too, shall adapt...”
Along the way, a girl who would later become a brilliant secretary joined them.
“I see... Then I want to try drinking too. I’m a secretary, after all. I have to eat out with other people. What kind of taste is it, if you had to compare?”
Despite the major changes in the personal life of each, all of them had contributed to the development of the company, to the point that they spent every single day being busy.
“Close to that of a perfume. In that it is hard to swallow.”
There would surely be many, many more changes.
“Hey, I can’t approve that opinion. Big Sis here will introduce you to delicious drinks. Rather than being taught by a man, you should learn from me. Lux, you can’t yet.”
Surely, their fates would twist further.
“Eh~?!”
“Benedict, bring another one. And something to crack it open with.”
For people to gather up, an encounter had to have happened. That was what it meant.
“Aight, aight...” Benedict stood up from the sofa. He had been dragged into Cattleya’s scheme, in which she had planned the conspiracy of attempting to make Violet Evergarden consume alcohol, because he himself had complied with it.
“O-Owah. Old Man. You were here?”
“‘Were here,’ you ask... this is my house.”
As they came across each other in the kitchen, Benedict had let out a brash voice without thinking. The reason might be that he perhaps was seen grinning as he walked in. Despite his nihilistic attitude, he was happy to spend time with his friends.
“I-I know. I was thinking you were taking too long in the toilet...”
“Cigar.”
With the kitchen’s small window open, Hodgins was smoking a cigar. All of the women despised the smell, so he rarely ever let them see him smoking. Just when Benedict was thinking about how he had suddenly stood up and disappeared, there he was, smoking in secret.
——He only smokes when he can’t calm down, though.
There was no better day to relax with their companions, and yet.
“Hey, take a look outside. It’s so quiet after the storm... like the wind. Even though it was so loud before.” Perhaps due to him being a little drunk, Hodgins’s face was red.
“True... Hey, need more booze. Ain’t there anything easier to drink?”
“Eh, why? You can’t give it to Little Lux.”
“Cattleya wants to make V drink some. Well, ain’t it okay? I think it’s about time she learns the ropes. Dunno when we’ll get to drink with her again... and it’s better to have people you get along with teaching you this kinda thing, right?”
“Eeh... it’s still too soon. If you insist, isn’t it enough to drip a drop of rum into her tea?”
“Can you even call that a drink? Make it a degree higher.”
Hodgins gave a strained smile. “Hey, hey, her big brother figure shouldn’t be saying this...”
“I say it because I’m her big brother figure. I mean, we’re getting more rookies. She’s the highlight of our Doll department. Eating with people is part of having a big job. Before she gets involved with someone who wants to make her drink...”
“Does this have anything to do with me telling you to be the branch manager?”
Hearing a slightly icy voice coming from the president, Benedict blinked. “No... sorta.”
“She’s still a child, and I’ll definitely always be with her in those kinds of places, so it’s okay. It’s still early to teach her how to drink. Nope, nope.”
“A ‘child’, you say... well, she’s got a childish side, but she ain’t one anymore.”
“She is – you, Cattleya and Little Lux, too, are all kids to me. Because you’re quick to do this kind of thing if I don’t keep an eye on you... My, my,” Hodgins said, blowing out the tobacco smoke. Mismatched as it was for someone with such a mature appearance, Benedict could get a glimpse of childishness in him.
“You’ll keep trying to do that from now on too? That’s impossible; face the reality,” Benedict bit out incidentally.
Silence.
Benedict’s words were not wrong. The CH Postal Company was growing rapidly as a business. The fact that the postal company led by Salvatore Rinaudo had withdrawn from the postal industry in the previous year had a major influence in this. They now reigned at a pivotal position in Leidenschaftlich’s postal service. The CH Postal Company would soon account for nearly all of the commissions from the people living in Leidenschaftlich. Other than being busy with work affairs, there were even discussions about relocating the head office because of problems with waiting areas and break rooms due to securing new employees.
“Like, you and I are gonna get damn busy. The Auto-Memories Doll department is gonna be the main organ of the head office and my place will be ordinary mail, right? We’ll be teaching people how things go, and I’ll be doing deliveries too. You’re the one with the busiest role. Anything and everything’s gonna be relayed to you. Getting to be close to your employees like until now while doing all that is just...”
It was natural for a company that had become bigger to do a corporative split-off and for one of their employees to manage the branch office. Benedict was still young but had the power to bring people together. The task would not be an impossible one if they put a veteran of the head office in charge of taking over it. They could do this, Hodgins had decided, thus he came up with the proposal.
“The regular meetings and other stuff that I take part in happen in the head office... It’s not like we won’t get to see each other.”
“Everyone will have a different post and position. We won’t get to see each other. Same for you, Old Man.”
“If it’s work, I can adjust it. I’ll do my best to administrate everyone so that the employees can get a time every now and then to relax like this...”
“Old Man, even if you do your best, V’s dating that nasty-ass military officer, so won’t they get married someday? Dunno ‘bout it, but... that’s why it’s impossible to always watch over us in the first place...”
Silence.
“Hey, don’t clam up.”
What was being thrust at Hodgins now was something that he did not want to look straight at, despite thinking about and readying himself for it. That was what he was being told.
“Hodgins – hey, Old Man.”
It was something that Benedict Blue had the right to say, exactly because they had been doing everything together from the start.
“Hey, don’t take it in a weird way. I ain’t saying this to be malicious. You left the Auto-Memories Doll department in the head office ‘cause your wish to watch over V is a big deal, right? I get it. She’s special to you.”
“That’s not it; I—”
“But she won’t be a kid forever. She’s different from back when she started working, with you teaching her everything. She’s someone who’s gonna let go of your hand one day. She ain’t your real daughter or your girlfriend. Then, if you had to say what she is, at the end of the day, she’s your employee. You’ll part ways one day. If you don’t get ready for that now, will you manage to get over it if she marries into that bastard’s family and he makes her leave the company?”
“Will you manage to get over it?” The question ruminated in Hodgins’s heart.
Benedict had shot him where it hurt without mercy. He was a gun expert. His aim was precise and the bleeding made Hodgins want to hold his own chest down.
——Will I recover if I ever have to be separated from Violet Evergarden? Hodgins pondered earnestly over the question. ——I don’t know.
He truly did not know.
Bonds were things that could not easily break off once they had connected, yet reality, time and busyness unpityingly caused the existence of “friends” to grow far apart.
——To the point that I don’t know, I...
Surely, a day like this would not happen five years from now. Their place to return to amidst the rain would be somewhere else.
——It’s not just her, but also you and everyone else.
To begin with, they might not even be working in the company itself anymore until then. More of them would fall for someone, nurture their love and move their places to be in life to their “homes”.
Twenty, thirty years from now, it might be hard for them to even work. Or they would not be alive – there was also that possibility.
The one who was more aware of this than anybody else was Hodgins, the oldest of them all.
——I’m the one who’s farthest apart in age.
That was exactly why he did not know.
“I have no idea.”
He did not want to see it. Did not want to think about it.
“I have too many things that matter to me, so I can’t make a move anymore. Y’know, you... you might aught at this, but... rather than when you’re young, getting hurt becomes scarier when you grow older. You start losing the energy to do your best and heal. It’s tiring. Still...”
Hodgins had thought that the youth in front of him, who referred to him as “Old Man” on a daily basis, was probably going to laugh, yet Benedict was expressionless.
“Still...”
He did nothing but listen. His posture of properly listening at times like these somewhat...
——...looks like Little Violet.
“Still, I know I’m the one who has to get moving the most. I’m getting everyone involved in the things I wanna do. That’s why I do what I have to. I also counted on you, because I trust you. I left it in your care. But... that and my feelings for her and you guys...”
“I get it.”
“...are different things, right? Y’know, you’re... mean. I’m like a foster parent to you, and yet... Even if you understand my loneliness...”
While Hodgins spoke as if bursting out, Benedict put a hand to his mouth as though to stop him. “I get it.”
Time halted completely.
Was he supporting the flustered figure of the one who was like a parent to him?
“My bad.”
Before he had noticed, he was carrying a load of things he must protect. Was he doing this due to realizing that he had left Hodgins to chance, thinking, “That’s because it’s him”?
“My bad. That just now was on me.”
Silence.
“I didn’t have to pick today to say this. Isn’t that right?”
“You think I’m being lame right now, don’t you?”
“Nah, you ain’t all that cool in the first place.”
“That’s a lie; I’m a generally-acknowledged beautiful young man... no, beautiful middle-aged man.”
“You might not be cool, but well, that’s what’s good about you. Right?”
Silence.
“The cool thing about my Claudia Hodgins is his uncool side.”
Since Benedict was speaking as if to comfort a child, Hodgins told him to “shut up”, slightly annoyed, yet burst into laughter nevertheless.
   The rain caused all sorts of things to pour. The way that people were drowned by the drops trickling down from the sky inevitably made them think about something.
As dawn broke, Claudia Hodgins sat up, body heavy from not getting much sleep. When he peeked at his room’s bed, Violet and Cattleya were sleeping wrapped in the same blanket. On the sofa, Benedict was scattered about, snoring in a way that made him want to laugh.
Hodgins looked for where Lux Sibyl might be. He went down from the third to the second floor, and then from the second to the first floor. She was nowhere to be found.
While thinking it could not be possible, Hodgins opened the front door, and sure enough, he could see the figure of a girl walking down the street towards him.
The clothes she had put to dry yesterday were surely half-wet. What was it that she wanted to do outside so badly to the point of going this far? He understood when he saw what she had in her arms.
“Ah, President.”
Lux was holding a paper bag with a lot of bread in it. The amount was enough that the small girl’s face could not be seen.
“Little Lux... could it be you went to buy us breakfast?”
Thinking back, this young woman was the kind of person who was always quick to act when she was trying to do something for someone. That was all it took to be a considerate person, but without kindness in their heart, they would not turn out this way. The reason why Hodgins had nominated her his secretary was not just that she could do any sort of work.
“That’s so nice.”
“Yes, the bakery owner is very nice. I woke up a bit too early, and when I went on a walk to see how things were outside, the bakery was just about to open and they were getting ready... I went to take a look ‘cause it seemed so delicious and they told me to come in.”
“Ah, hm...”
“I was so touched when they said they baked bread for people who were hungry early in the morning, so I told them many thanks for selling them and bought lots of it. It’s the bakery from that street around the corner.”
“As expected of my secretary. Did you properly get the receipt?”
At those words, Lux showed him a smile that resembled a blooming flower. “Huhu, of course.”
For Hodgins, who had spent the night deep in thought about all sorts of things, that smile was a soothing one. It was like the water of a lake for someone who was feeling thirsty.
Hodgins wordlessly took the bag from Lux. “Little Lux, I’m seriously glad you came to us.”
“Only in this kind of situation, right?”
“All the time. Always. Little Lux, you’re still young, will probably keep working with us... and you’re such a good secretary... I’m the happiest CEO in Leidenschaftlich.”
“Are you going to hire me for life?”
“Eh?”
“Is that a no?”
“No, I could. But that’d mean working with me for life, y’know?”
“Is that bad? I have nowhere else to go.”
When asked with such an innocent look, Hodgins faltered.
“I won’t say the stuff Benedict does, like wanting the company for me.”
“Well, I might... end up giving it to you if you say that, so don’t ever. Hahah... Of course, keep working for us forever and always at my place. Huh, this is kinda like a marriage vow... Wanna take this opportunity and marry me in the future? Just kidding...” Upon thinking that the jest that came out incidentally was an unsavory one right after saying it, Hodgins looked at Lux’s reaction, only to find her staring back at him blankly. He had made himself into a caricature of an old man bothering a girl. “No, it was a prank! But hey. Little Lux, you might be the only one who can go along with me, so having this kind of small talk is... I-I’m not looking at you with dirty eyes, really! We’re too far apart in age, after all! We’re c-close enough that we can crack this kind of joke to each other, right?”
Lux pretended to think for just a few seconds. “Huhu, I can tell. That it’s a joke, at least. But not happening. We’re not getting married.”
And then, she flat-out rejected him.
“Ah, yes.” Although Hodgins would have been at loss if she had accepted it, his shoulders dropped somewhat.
“But President, I’m prepared to nurse you if you ever become unable to work.”
“Don’t... suddenly thrust such a cruel reality at me.”
“Eh, is it? From my point of view... this is quite a deep form of love. President, you’re the first decent adult who accepted me. I’ll devote my whole life to you.”
“Little Lux, you sure like me a lot. Gonna marry me after all?”
This time, Lux actually grinned and replied, “I’ll take that one home and consider it.”
“Amazing; that answer’s like the business talk at the company.”
“Because you’re teasing me... even though you’re well-aware that I don’t even know love yet.”
“Don’t know love yet”. The destructive power of those words caused Hodgins to regret his lighthearted proposal a little.
“Then, I’ll ask again in about five years. I should be at a nice middle age by then.”
“You say that, President, but you’re going on a trip with some hottie next week. I know it.”
The duo, who somehow seemed like they would or other be hanging together for a long time, returned to the office with bouncing chatter.
   In order to make breakfast for everyone together, Hodgins and Lux stood in the kitchen by themselves.
Besides the already-baked bread, they would need drinks and vegetables. Those were merely simple preliminary preparations, but Hodgins felt that just this was somehow enjoyable, unlike doing the work on his own.
“President, you have yours with one sugar cube and a slice of lemon, right?”
“And for Little Lux, it’s two sugar cubes with milk, yeah? I know it.”
While arranging the bread on a plate, they also poured water over the tealeaves and left them to steam. Perhaps due to the scenery that could be seen from the kitchen’s small window being a blue sky with not a single cloud in it, it was awfully dazzling.
“Good morning.”
The next person who appeared amidst the morning sunlight was Violet. Her soft golden hair was just a bit disheveled. Hodgins’s hand naturally reached out to it.
“Morning... You’ve got a bedhead, Little Violet.”
“Excuse me...” Violet looked back at Hodgins as he caressed her head, seeming a little embarrassed. Her eyes were just slightly red. She might have not been able to sleep very well.
“Morning, Violet. Are Cattleya and Benedict also up?”
“Benedict was awake until a while ago, but when I got up from the bed, he began sleeping again by Cattleya’s side.”
“Morally speaking, it’s that kinda thing. I’ll go give him a warning.”
Hodgins laughed a little, seeing Lux off as she walked away while rotating her tiny shoulders. He then turned his gaze back to Violet. Her bedhead, which he had supposedly fixed with the caressing, had returned. For some reason, both of them being alone like this in a kitchen bathed in morning sunlight struck him as extremely peculiar.
Just the two of them, having such a tender time. How many more opportunities would they have for that?
They were already at it. He should talk about something. That was what Hodgins thought, but the words did not come out of him. Not because he had no topic to discuss. He could come up with as many things to talk about as he wanted, such wanting flowers to decorate the table or that they would surely have many customers today who were unable to come yesterday.
But he did not want to spoil this morning. He felt that it might crumble if he spoke even one sentence.
Violet was there. She had her blue eyes directed his way, looking at him. It was no longer awkward for the two of them to stay silent. That was their relationship.
Perhaps still sleepy, she was in a haze. He wanted to watch her standing amidst this gentle time for a little longer.
As she would usually always seem wide-awake, Hodgins believed that she was laidback to this extent due to being in the presence of people with whom she could be at ease from the bottom of her heart. That he had played a part in this feeling of security of hers.
——Will you forget one day?
One day, the position that Claudia Hodgins occupied in the life of Violet Evergarden would become smaller.
——She only gets bigger on my end, though.
Going to the hospital numerous times. Pushing her wheelchair. Giving her a notebook and teaching her how to write.
——I for sure can’t forget. These moments, days, everything like this with you.
The fact that he had not stopped her from fighting in the war. That he had thought they could use her.
——I can’t forget.
Delivering to Violet an outfit that could hide her prosthetic arms, yet that would also make her look her most beautiful.
——I’m sure I won’t forget about this morning either.
About that quiet morning, which was much like the one from before everyone was caught in the great storm and barged in.
Hodgins touched Violet’s hair again. Although she had told Benedict not to touch it, with Hodgins, she all but slightly left a strand in his hand’s care and let him take it, almost like how a cat would do.
——Aah, I want to hug you.
He was not in love with her. That would never be the case.
However, if she were his real daughter, on days like these, mornings like these, he would have easily said, “Good morning, precious” and embraced her.
“I had a dream, President Hodgins,” Violet whispered out of the blue with a freshly awake, faintly hoarse voice.
“Dream...?”
The stunning young woman, who was no longer a girl, talked about her dream like a child, “Yes; in the dream... you owned a clothing store.”
“Huhu, that so?”
“I cannot make clothes. You told me that you did not need me, President Hodgins, if I could not make clothes...”
“That’s horrible of me, huh.”
“Even when I said I could polish the shoes, clean up or do anything, you did not listen...”
Unlike the real one, the dream version of Hodgins had apparently chosen to part ways with Violet.
“Little Violet, what did you do about that?”
“I asked countless times. However, you rejected it countless times. I thought about standing in front of the shop until you allowed me in, but it started raining like yesterday.”
“Hm. And then?”
“Major Gilbert came to pick me up and told me to come home with him, but...”
“Hm.”
“I waited for President to come out of the store even as the lights went out.”
“Hm.”
“Despite waiting and waiting, President Hodgins did not come out, and at some point, a passerby told me, ‘This shop has moved’.”
“Even though it was open until just a moment ago?”
“It was a dream, after all... And then – and then, I asked where it was and went after it. Benedict and Cattleya also appeared in-between, but they seemed to have other things to do, saying they would come after me later... As for Lux, she was the only one who had been hired by you from the very beginning, so she also asked you to hire me again, but in the end, you said no could do.”
“Hm...” Suddenly, Hodgins felt so pained about everything that it was hard to breathe. “And then, Little Violet, what did you do...?” His hand reached out to Violet.
“I kept looking at the interior of the store beyond the shop window from outside.”
Not towards her head, but towards her eyes, where her golden lashes fluttered like the wings of a fairy.
“Inside it, many people – people that I know and do not know – came and left... showing how lively the shop was.”
A sea had silently formed in them, which dissolved and disappeared once Hodgins’s index finger touched it.
“Major came to pick me up for the nth time and said you had told him that my standing there was causing him problems. But, for whatever reason, I at the very least knew that if I stepped away from there even for a moment, you would never let me in... therefore, I could not comply. But I did not want to trouble you, President, so I was unable to make a decision... I attempted to ask Major for instructions, but he was also gone before I realized.”
The sea – the teardrop – turned into a pearl and slipped down her cheek.
“I... I... ended up crying.” Violet stared at the sky, the look in her eyes seeming almost as if the scene from her dream was there at this very moment. “To think I would cry like that...”
“Hm.”
“That was why President Hodgins would not hire me, I thought... And also why Major had grown tired and left.”
“Hm.”
“Then, without my notice, you came outside. You looked the same as that post-war day when you went to visit me at the hospital. You were very surprised with my appearance, as I was soaked with mud and rain. And so, you said this: ‘Guess we’ll start with how to hold a needle’. You told me that you had not invited me for the new job because it would surely be difficult with these hands of mine, so I was extremely relieved... Then, then...” Violet’s words cut off at once.
Unable to hold himself back, Hodgins pulled her into an embrace as if shoving her little head into his chest.
While being embraced, Violet said with eyes that looked as though she was still dreaming, “...with some effort, I could still be helpful. I was able to confirm this, after all.”
Hearing her let out a relieved sigh in his arms, Hodgins forgot about both his and Violet’s positions, clasping her to his chest very, very firmly. “You sure are helpful... Was there anything about me that made you feel uncertain?” Upon realizing that his voice sounded tearful, Hodgins allowed the tears to overflow at the truth.
——Aah, I’m such an idiot. Got caught up in it and ended up crying too.
As the girl whom he thought of as his own daughter, despite her being an actual adult, had shed tears, he found himself crying along with her. Almost like a child. Even though he was supposed to conduct himself as an elder in this situation.
“I do not know.”
“But, has anything like that ever happened until now...? You had that dream because you were uneasy.”
“‘Uneasy’... That might have been the case. Yesterday night, I came to know that many things were progressing while I was away, so I have the feeling that I was quite agitated.”
“Sorry; we were doing things on our own accord. Even though we’ve been together since the founding.”
“No, I am often absent, and it is only natural for some things to be decided in the meantime. I am an employee. I feel that your judgement is correct. Employees must correspond to the changes of a company. My surroundings are about to change significantly. I am grateful to you, President, for letting me be here like always. However...”
“‘However’...?”
“However, I do not know if I can cope with it. With the matters regarding Major, the ones regarding the company... with the fact that Benedict will be going to a different office building. When I think about these things...”
“It’s okay.”
“When I think about them, I realize that the number of things I should prioritize has increased too much.”
“Little Violet.”
“The order of priorities...”
“It’s all right.”
“I have to deal with situations of every kind as I live, and yet...”
——Surely, Violet Evergarden wouldn’t be alive if she didn’t do that.
Always, at all times.
She had been living through corresponding to her surroundings despite being at loss regarding its circumstances, putting everything she could do to use while looking for a place to belong and an adult who would take care of her. She was not allowed to waver. For beasts, hesitation was death.
Violet did not know unconditional love. She now had at last earned herself this warm place through her efforts, but it was about to suffer a rapid change with the course of time.
After running, running and running, Violet – previously one such beast – was watching the nest she had finally found crumble down. Even when people knew they had to prepare to start running again, there would come a time when they would be short of breath and unable to move.
Violet had gone from wild animal to person.
Her human parts and animal parts co-existed, occasionally revealing themselves. When she was the animal, she simply did not mind how much a place changed as long as she could live in it. However, it was difficult to live while holding something better, more important.
Now that she had become a person through the increasing of her emotions...
“I shall fight. I can always be of use. President Hodgins, please forget this aspect of me that I just showed you.”
...she had turned into just a girl who was a little bit scared of the future.
“Please... forget about it.”
Who had made her this way? Gilbert was likely the first, but the ones who had done the finishing touches were definitely all the people in this place.
“No way, I’m not forgetting.”
At Hodgins’s words, Violet lowered her eyebrows, looking troubled.
“Don’t make a face like that; I’m not teasing. I meant to say that you don’t need to worry about it. You indeed might’ve gotten weak. But is that a bad thing? You had nothing when you met me for the first time. Not even your brooch, right...? But now you have lots of things. You went on a journey for a long time and got more stuff to shoulder while you were at it, so it’s no wonder that you’d end up in a dilemma.” Albeit knowing that Cattleya, Benedict and Lux were looking at them in shock from the shadows at the doorway, Hodgins went on, “You know... life is a journey. Little Violet, you’ll go on this journey, won’t you?”
He had already forgotten about his anxiety. The feeling of frustration at such things and the overwhelming wish to cling to someone were now gone.
“You started your journey with a little less luggage than other people, so you’re staring at your bag now that it’s gotten a bit heavy, wondering what happened to it. You don’t know what to throw away anymore.”
He was able to think, from the depths of his heart, that he had returned to his usual self. While embracing her, who was indeed still young and confused in the middle of her journey, he was finally able to think so.
“You need clothes and money, of course, and good shoes are vital. Right, and an umbrella too. When you look into your bag and realize that you actually have nothing that you can get rid of, it’s indeed a problem. Even though it’s a hassle because it’s so heavy. What do you think you should do?”
He could still be useful.
“Train... my physical strength... No, calibrate my prosthetics...”
He was still needed.
“You’re such a fool... Either leave it in someone’s care and continue the journey or have someone take half of it.”
Even if it were only for a short while.
“Gilbert will probably take half of the luggage. I can take care of the rest that you can’t carry over here. I’ll be in Leidenschaftlich forever, after all. Little Violet, no matter where you go, I’ll stay here and wait for you to come back, and no matter when you come over, I’ll welcome you. I’ll take care of the contents of your bag with pleasure.”
——Even if you only remember me a few times a year someday...
“Listen up: whenever you’re troubled, remember that I’m here. And then you’ll be able to go on a journey again anytime.”
——...I’ll ready myself to welcome you at any time of the year.
“Am I really supposed to leave my luggage here?”
——I’m the kind of man who can do that, and you need it for sure.
“Hm-hm, that’s not it. Y’see, this is about memories. All you have to do is to know. That I’m here. This is the way to make your luggage lighter. Whenever you’re having problems, bam, remember me. If you do that, the worries you have now will definitely decrease a little. Y’know, at the end of the day... people’s place to come home to aren’t places, they’re ‘somebody’. You should know that much. You’d have gone to any battlefield if Gilbert was there, right? Someday, yes, you might quit being an Auto-Memories Doll. You might not come back to Leidenschaftlich.”
——It’ll be great if this “someday” never comes, though.
“But your current memories are with me. I’ll be a representation of them. So that you, my dear... will be able to open your memories anytime. When this moment right now becomes nostalgic to you, come see me. I’ll always be here. Waiting for you. You’re feeling ‘lonely’ right now. But... Little Violet. You have me. You’re not alone.”
——I want you to remember.
“I do not understand very well... However...”
——I’m always protecting you.
“...you have always guided me.”
——Waiting for your return.
“I never doubt your word.”
——I’ll be waiting here.
“But, President Hodgins, I have only one wish.”
——I want you to show up when your journey ends.
Deciding to deal with the sobbing coming from behind the door later, Hodgins opted for staying like this for just a bit longer. Her lover might get angry if he saw it, but he had the right to do it, at least to some extent. After all, she was Claudia Hodgins’s dear employee.
Hodgins asked with a particularly gentle tone, “What would it be, Little Violet?”
Violet blinked and looked up at Hodgins. The last drop spilled from her eyes.
“If, only if... there comes a time when you will quit the postal company and start doing something else...”
“Hm.”
“...please call me. No matter where you are, I will rush to you.”
“Hm.”
“I will definitely be of help... Even if not, should your luggage become too much, please call me when you need someone to carry it for you. I shall hasten to visit you.”
“For real?”
“Yes. I, too, will carry President’s luggage. You should know it. I am strong.”
“Huhu, yep, definitely. One day, you’ll understand what I mean by ‘luggage’. Hey...”
No one would imagine that a single drop could be the start of something so big. However, it would earn itself great meaning after a while passed. Should it continue pouring, it could also summon boundless blessings and curses.
   “Hiya, I’m Hodgins. What’s your name?”
Silence.
“This kid’s such a taciturn.”
“She... doesn’t have a name yet. She’s an orphan with no education. Can’t talk either.”
“That’s so terrible of you. She’s such a beauty. Just give a name worthy of her.”
   “Little Violet, thanks for meeting me.”
Love was almost like rain.
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miss-choco-chips · 4 years ago
Text
Favorite color
Ever since he was born, his world was filled with colors, a beautiful rainbow at his fingers. He’d look down at them at night, or when his parent’s leaving made him want to cry, or when a horror story told by a classmate in the playground scared him half to death, and find comfort in their silky touch and bright hues.
He was seven when he learned the meaning behind them. And the blaring lack of red signaled the first, but not last, heartbreak of his life.
Blue, green, purple, black… and bright yellow. A teacher, a missed opportunity, a first love, life and death… and friendship. No eternal love for Tim, it seemed.
Well. He hadn’t really expected any different. Who would love him forever, when his own parents didn’t?
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
He had forgotten it, and it escaped his notice for many years. Until one night, following Dick Grayson as he jumped from rooftop to rooftop, when he noticed his purple string moving in synch with him. Pointing towards his hero, the boy who had given him his very first hug that night at the circus. His First Love, his Not Meant to Be.
That night, Tim packed up early and went home. He just couldn’t stand the red uniform contrasting sharply with his purple thread.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
When Dick left, he thought maybe now he could go back to his old habits, to run the streets looking for flashes of the new robin without the baggage of avoiding to look at his own hand.
No such luck.
The green made a whole lot of sense when news of Jason’s death reached him, tough.
It wouldn't be the last night he’d cry himself to sleep, holding the frayed ends of his fated Almost.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Becoming Robin was both easy and painful. Comfortable, because the blue string pointing him towards Bruce meant this was always supposed to happen; heartbreaking, because it took a kid dying. Because Tim might not have a romantic soul mate, but his hands, that had made a green string break to grant him access to the blue path, were stained red nonetheless.
Wearing Robin’s red, with all the hurt and bad memories it carried, felt like a subpar punishment.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Meeting his Yellows almost passed his awareness. In the middle of a crisis, every adult missing, no mentor to guide him, he couldn’t exactly spare a thought for the kids looking shellshocked at him, each other and their hands.
After, when Young Justice was officially formed, he firmly avoided looking at Bart, Superboy and Wondergirl. Their eyes followed him, pleading, but he’d learned no good ever came from strings that weren’t red.
And the red in his soul wasn’t from love.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Despite himself and his best efforts, they grew closer. Life or death situations had that effect on people, after all.
His own reluctance, which had in turn provoqued Kon’s anger, Bart’s dejection and Cassie’s confusion, slowly began to crumble. He was helpless in the face of their unrelenting friendship.
The strings grew shinier, stronger, healthier, the yellow a stark contrast to frayed (dead) green, cold blue, distant purple. Scary black.
Tim still despised the rainbow in his fingers, but… he could maybe withstand the sparks of yellow he’d catch from the corner of his eye, knowing just who were at the other end.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
It wasn’t exactly team training. Greta, Anita, Cissie, Slobo and the others didn’t join them, for whatever reason. It was always the four of them, leaning on and learning from each other.
When Kon’s strength frustrated him, when the world around him seemed to be made of bubbles and sea foam, Tim stayed late at night every weekend to help. Every spare moment directed towards coaching him, again and again, through exercises he had to come by himself (Clark was no big help, here), until exhaustion made his muscles tremble and Kon’s anger had burned out from frustration to soft acceptance that he just wasn’t like the rest. Until he could hold still and let Superboy trace the side of his jaw with a careful finger, and exchange proud little smiles when his face remained unbroken.
Bart being raised by video games had the expected outcome; he had little to no practical, day to day life knowledge. He was the closest living thing to a Looney Toon. Which was fun and good when crime fighting, his crazy ideas often saved their ass last minute, but unacceptable if integrating him into society was to be considered. So Tim would take him out, hand in hand so he didn’t forget himself and ran on his own, to leisurely stroll down busy streets, arcades, schools, libraries. Talk to people in parks and visit recreational centers, barter with street vendors and ask the little boy selling flowers on Jump Street how his mother is doing. Whatever Tim could think of that would soften Bart’s cultural shock.
In that regard, Cassie was a godsend. With her own attentive mentor, and raised like a normal girl until she obtained her powers, she was the most well balanced member on their team. Tim had started to feel a little restless (how can he help her, how can he convince her to stay…), when he noticed her frustrated, sad face whenever Donna was mentioned on Tv, when any reporter or older hero compared the two Wonder Girls. Familiar as he was with imposter syndrome, Tim would rest his arm around her shoulders and turn to the rest of the team, loudly reminding everyone to ‘speed up guys, Cassie here’s already done with her training routine’ or slump tiredly against her while complaining about ‘how immature they are, I can’t deal, thank God you’re here to remind me competent people do exist’.
It was familiar, to help them along. To nudge them forward and watch their backs as they went, firmly making their way towards being the awesome men and woman he knew they’d become. Lending a hand here and there, working on steading their foundations, so he’d be remembered fondly when they inevitably took off and went on with their lives.
He was used to that, to looking for ways his fated people would want him around. Being a good brother to Dick, an eager student to Bruce (a good mourner for Jason).
What he wasn’t used to was reciprocation, though.
Tim had learned how to fly from the best, from Dick Grayson himself.The boy with no powers that looked at gravity and laughed, sayed “thanks, but no”. But there were some things only a true meta could experience, ways to move his body just so, to take advantage of wind currents to either speed or slow his movements. Kon also visited him in Gotham, unknowing or uncaring about its meta restriction, risking pissing off Batman himself just to spend time with Tim.
There was Bart, kind, cute, friendly Bart, who would stop eating and playing around to drag Tim to the training grounds and run laps around him, as silently as he knew how. Making Tim used to fighting against someone quicker than him, lighter on their feet. To count incredibly soft steps even when they made no sound, and use other senses to pinpoint exactly where the next hit was going to come from. And after they were done, there was always a warm smile and some sweet treat (always different, as if Bart was determined to figure out Tim’s preferences by trial and mistake), the new knowledge and delicious prize worth the dirt in unmentionable places.
As stated before, Cassie was an absolute godsend. But it wasn’t just because she was easier to deal with than the rest. Or because she understood the pressure he had on his shoulders, being raised in the shadow of two incredibly renowned heroes. When Tim’s position as leader had been taken away (after Bruce’s plans for taking out the league became known, and ‘what if he has the same for us’), she took him aside. Hugging him, promising him the team’s anger was going to pass, that she could see why those contingencies might be necessary, that even if she was officially in charge, she’d always defer to him when it mattered. Her trust in him and his heart was unshakable, firm as the arm he’d put round her when self doubt arose its head.
(It wasn’t supposed to be this way; if they reciprocated, they didn’t owe him, and then how was he supposed to keep them close? To convince him to stay, to love the boy with loveless fate?)
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Jason was unexpected, but Tim couldn’t hold it against him. Even there, bleeding out in the Tower, he felt… at ease.
His predecessor was back. Bruce’s son was back. The prodigal Robin had returned, by some miracle. Tim’s shift had come to an end; even if he died here, he had succeeded in keeping Bruce sane, and now that the real deal was in town, Jason could take over and everything would go back as it should have been. Everyone (B, Dick, Babs, Alfred) would be happier. Maybe they’d mourn him, for a bit, but with such a joyous occasion as a beloved one returning home, it wasn’t like grief could stay for long.
Someone yelled, near. Warm hands shaking as they touched his face infinitely careful, small fingers intertwined with his in a very familiar hold, a strong and slender arm around his back as he’s being held in a half hug. Cries, pleas, demands.
And while nothingness claims Tim, drags him to a well of black, yellow still clings to his eyelids. A touch that keeps him warm even though unconsciousness is supposed to be so cold.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Death and life. Damian.
Tim can see the first one, what with all of the brat’s attempts to end him. It’s the second one that has him stumped.
He knows not all strings go both ways. His purple one, for example; even if Dick was Tim’s first love, everyone and their mother knew Babs’ was his. Dick had a string pointing towards Tim, but it was a mentor-student one. Same as the one he and Bruce shared. Jason, too; Tim’s side of the string was the green of Almost, while the former Robin’s color was black (Tim taking his place as Robin, and being the only one in the family offering his hand again and again despite his murderous actions, was in some poetic sense the death of an old role, and the birth of a new family dynamic).
Damian, though… Well. He was almost sure they had the same color for each other (how else to explain such dangerous rage), but really, unless the kid was willing to share, it was only suppositions for now.
His only comfort remained the three beams of light, of a yellow almost golden in its healthy shine.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
When Tim changed his suit following Conner’s death, everyone thought it was an homenage. A way to pay tribute to a hero that was his closest, dearest friend. A way to never forget (as if he could, ever, with the lifeless line of pale beige, once yellow, dangling from his twitching finger).
They weren’t wrong, but it wasn’t just that.
Red had always pained him, in a deep, almost forgotten place. A thorn on his side, scratching against his heart. For the longest part, yellow had filled him to the brim, until hurt and yearning had no place inside him. With Kon’s warmth missing, red bleed in the place between Cassie and Bart, despite their best efforts to close ranks and keep it out.
Their sad eyes followed him during the funeral, knowing what the color meant to him. Just how much he was hurting himself, right now. But, lost in their own grief, there was little to be done.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
By the time Tim got the call about Bart, he already knew.
He ignored the ringing phone, holding a sobbing Cassie in his arms, both desperately clutching at their only remaining yellow string.
Between the two of them, color like blood seeped.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Every so often, when Ra’s voice in his ear became too familiar for comfort, where lines draw in sand begane to erode and blur, he’d raise his hand, eyes locked on the three yellow strings, and watch as Cassie’s moved, disappearing end pointing always in her direction.
He was fairly sure that, wherever she was, she was doing the same. Reminding herself he was alive as well, hadn’t left her behind.
Her absence from his life was necessary, finding Bruce a priority, and the red of his new suit (his new name) was proof of just how deeply it all ran. But it didn’t mean he wasn’t yearning for her lighter color.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
They were back, and he was hiding.
He wanted to run to their arms, hug them and never let them out of his view, far from where he could protect them (keep them). He wanted Kon’s hand on his face, delicate despite his strength, un-trembling when Tim’s own would softly join it on his check and held it there; Bart’s fingers between his own, too steady and constant for the boy who didn’t know how to sit still; Cassie’s arm on his waist, his own on her back, as they shared the weight of the world in their shoulders.
And because he wanted so damn much, he couldn’t do it.
He was covered in red. His first love discarded him, his Almost died so Tim could have his Teacher, his Life and Death was so heavily focused on the last bit… his hands lacked red, but oh, how much he leaked of it in his soul.
He couldn’t let them die again, be stained by his twisted fate; even if it meant he could’t hold them close any longer.
Letting go was more painful than holding on, but he was used to it by now.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
They find him. Of course they do; even without Kon’s senses, they all have beams of gold pointing them towards him, like Dorothy’s yellow brick road.
Tim knew it, was ready for it. And as such, had prepared the words that would push them away, to where it was safer.
Or so he thought.
“We are not leaving you.”
“Who cares about fate? You are ours, Rob.”
“It’s been long enough, Tim. Time to come home, we are done waiting.”
He denies them, shakes despite his usual iron clad control over his body, heart wrenching painfully at their decided expressions.
“You don’t understand. I’m Red Robin now. I’m not… I’m no good for you.”
“I could literally snap your back with the flick of a finger, shut up with that ‘I’m dangerous’ bullshit.”
“Yeah, even Bart could be dangerous given the right circumstances, you aren’t the only one here to watch for. It doesn’t mean shit to us.”
“That’s right, I- wait, what do you mean ‘even Bart?”
“Not the point, Imp.”
They don’t get it. He takes his mask off, wants to give them a good look at his eyes, to read his emotions there and finally realize what’s wrong about him.
“Almost all my strings have something to do with death, or were touched by it. Don’t you see it?” He raises his hand, despite knowing they can’t see his strings, only their own. “I have no red here, only blood. I can’t… I’m not safe to love. I’ll never be loved.”
Kon snaps, something he had rarely done since their Young Justice days, hands on Tim’s shoulders, seemingly torn between shaking him and pulling him close. The latter wins.
(As it always does)
“This is love, you idiot! WE love you!”
Tim chokes on something (saliva, his own breath, emotions). Gasps, tears coming to his eyes unbridled.
He feels two pairs of arms joining the first one, a cocoon of warmth and unconditional love forming around him.
Bart’s sad eyes watch Tim from under Kon’s hug. “I don’t have red either, Rob. Romantic, platonic, filial… who gives a fuck”, he shrugs, before hiding his face against the red of Tim’s uniform. Uncaring of all it represents for him or perhaps doing his best to defy it.
Cassie just holds them all in the circle of her own embrace, forehead to the back of Tim’s head. Her hold is the tightest, and he just realizes- she lost all of them, didn’t she? To death and grief, all too far to touch, and now that they’re back in her arms, there’s little chance of her ever letting go again.
“Love has more than one form, Tim.”
He shudders in the middle of this weirdly emotional dog pile, and thinks. About Bruce and Dick’s pride when they successfully taught him something new. Of Jason’s reluctant smile when Tim first tugged him along to some joined patrol, sneakily edging him closer to the family with every interaction. Of Damian, who would often look down at his own hands (and Tim would honestly kill someone to know just which color the young boy had for Tim) and then at him, with something like hope in his green eyes.
He thinks… yeah. And this one…
(He gives up, closing his eyes and snuggling deeper into Kon’s chest, knees buckling but staying up thanks to his three rays of sunlight holding him in place between them.)
This one’s shape might just be his favorite.
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enmy-writes · 4 years ago
Text
Baby Avenger
Summary: (Y/N) is one of the youngest avenger members and some government officials repeatedly let her know of “her position.” So, she lets them know exactly what her position is.
Word Count: 2100
Fandom: MCU Avengers
Pairing: Avengers x Reader
Genre: Fluff, soft, slight angst and sadness, & family love.
Rated: 18+
Content Warnings: profanity, death, abandonment, bullying, this is my first ever post of any fanfiction ever so it’s probably bad
**** This is my first ever imagine that I have ever finished and published. Please give me feedback and let me know what else I should write! I’m very excited and nervous so please let me know if you enjoyed this :) I’m thinking of making this Y/N character into a little “Baby Avenger” one-shot series, so let me know your thoughts ****
 _____________________________________________________________
Baby Avenger.
Baby Avenger.
Baby. Avenger.
 In her head, her stomping can be heard throughout the whole Compound and all of its residents and guests can hear her anger. They know she’s going right to the meeting room; not the team meeting room, but the meeting room they use when they have special guests in for a meeting.
The new government officials who are now “in charge” of the Avengers since The Snap Part 2 were in for the day to go over the general plans that the Avengers have been coming up with. They’re nicer than those in charge of the group from the Accords, but in no way were they nice to majority of the group as a whole.
(Y/N) (L/N) happens to be the second to youngest member on the team coming in at an age of 18, second only to her best friend Peter Parker
(Y/N) is an orphan, the typical origin story of any superhero. Her parents spent their last minutes pushing her out of their burning house in rural Pennsylvania. Actually, it was her father who got her out of the flames and by their fishpond 100 meters from the house. Her mother was inside, trapped under a steal beam in the basement.
(Y/N)’s mother was a scientist who worked in secret in a little band of scientists who tried to accomplish their own small victories in testing the alterations and limits of humans. The goal of these scientists is to stay out of sight of the CIA, FBI, S.H.I.E.L.D., and other government agencies. Most of them are left alone and those who get found are either immediately sent to a high security prison or recruited to continue their experiments for a certain country/agency.
(Y/N)’s mother decided to give herself her treatment she was working on instead of potentially kidnapping someone in the everyone-knows-everything kind of town that they had been living in. Her experiment and life studies were all in trying to find a way to unlock the rest of the human brain so that more than that small percentage is being used at a time. It has been hypothesized that humans could do a lot if their brains just used itself more.
The only problem is when she gave the treatment to herself, she was unknowingly pregnant, and the treatment attached onto that small lifeform instead of her own. She created a super baby.
No one knew the exact answer to what is on the other side of that tunnel of science. No one knew what opening the mind could do, there were only theories to support ideas. Plenty of scientific evidence, but it meant nothing with no legit proof.
Well, turns out that those on the team of “you will gain the ability to read minds and shit unlike any human” were the correct guessers.
(Y/N) can read others’ minds, move things with her mind, slow down time in her mind to be able to successfully breakdown a situation and perform the best possible reaction to anything that comes her way. Oh, and the color spectrum is broader for her, allowing her to see a significantly more amount of colors than a normal human (including seeing the aura’s and heat that people give off. Very useful in the few missions she goes on.).
But her parents are dead.
After setting small (Y/N) down, her father ran back in to save the love of his life. Or, well, that’s what the towns’ people say to romanticize the situation. A brave man trying to save his family.
In the end, her father had shaken his head, laughing at the moment like a mad man with tears running down his face. He pulled (Y/N) in for the tightest hug that he had ever given the girl—which is tight considering how close the two really were. They were just like two peas in a pod, the light of each other’s lives, basically soulmates.
But love makes you do crazy things.
“You listen to me, (Y/N).” He gripped her face in a painful grip, cheeks sure to be bruised later. “I will always love you. Don’t doubt that, baby girl, okay? I love you so so so so much” By this time, tears are pouring off his face, the neon flames coming from the house reflecting off his wet face. “Mommy… mommy just needs me now, baby. I need mommy, too. We love you so much.”
It had confused her, his words. Nothing could prepare her to watch her father run back into the house, leaving her by the pond with nothing but a small bag of little family things like pictures, little stupid gifts, and a notebook she had stolen from her mom’s bookshelf one day.
Her mother’s grandfather had been friends with Howard Stark, both science men having been in the same circle of famous inventors since before WWII. While neither her mother nor father personally knew his son, Tony, he was still listed as the godfather to the child. With no close friends allowed in their secret circle, old bonds and pacts that her grandfather had with the older Stark led to a blind trust in the man.
Tony Stark had agreed to be the godfather during a one-week bender in his 30s, and when he was yelled at about it, he chose to just keep it there because “the chances of this happening is very slim.”
But here we are, Baby Avenger.
The officials who are here now actually were the same people that used to do check-ins and such with them pre-Accords, so they knew the team better than any government official save for the rare union that the team members may have with government officials. (Y/N) randomly has one with the Queen of England (she did a favor for Her Majesty once, and now they have tea every third Thursday of every month).
They knew that Tony suffered from panic attacks, and they knew Steve was going through a never ending loop of an existential crisis, and that Bucky will most likely always be having an identity crisis, and that Sam cries to sleep a lot around a certain time of year that renders him almost useless in his sleep deprived state he puts himself into. They know EVERYTHING vulnerable about the team.
So, that means they know how when she first got to the team and to Tony that she wouldn’t speak to anyone unless absolutely necessary. It took her almost a year to be able to speak more than a sentence to every person she was around. No one was too upset, though, Tony was trying to figure out how to save himself and rebrand his whole legacy and the Avengers weren’t really a family family yet like they are now. (Y/N)’s shyness made it much easier on the adults to figure out their stressful situations.
The officials, though, never got why she wouldn’t speak to them. They actually pushed her progress back more and more with taunts and comments such as “Oh, the baby can’t speak?” or a “Get your phone out! She’s about to say her first words!” every time she did go to say something.
Tony soon got fed up with it and filed a lawsuit against them which threatened their agency enough to pull them out and let a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent be a liaison for them. After their presence was rid of, (Y/N) grew exponentially with her new family. She was still home schooled, but now she had Peter Parker as a friend and world geniuses as her teachers. She was an only child, but now she’s a big sister to Morgan and has plenty of people on the team that are dubbed her siblings (since they don’t act their age majority of the time to be considered aunts and uncles).
While she’s trained to fight, (Y/N) doesn’t go out on the field much unless they need her brain or her extended vision. She likes to remain behind the computer screen and help that way. She’s invented a way to make prosthetics like Bucky’s become more available to the general public and has started a school/home that’s three miles from the Compound for orphaned kids, mutants, super kids, and those who aren’t accepted where they come from.
In conclusion, (Y/N) is 18 and not useless in any way, shape, or form.
So why, why, do these absolute short dick idiots decide that they can come into here, her home, and push her around like she hasn’t contributed more to the Earth and society in the short 18 years than their middle-aged asses?
Eyes narrowed and seeing red, she stomps her way down the last hall, shoving herself into the door of the meeting room and throwing it open.
The team stays unfazed, knowing she’d show up pissed at some point. The officials, though, jump in their seat and turn to look at her.
It wasn’t the biggest meeting, the original Avengers plus Bucky, Sam, and Wanda sit around the table. Though, Rocket and Groot are here sitting along the back wall, looking bored as hell. Thor must have drug them along.
Fists clenched, (Y/N) narrows her eyes more. She’s been here since the first attack. Sure, she didn’t fight since she was like, 8 or so, but she was in charge of her man-behind-the-computer work. She’s been a part of the team since the beginning, and these assholes are too big of pricks to acknowledge that.
That’s what’s pissing the girl off. This could have been a meeting for every one of the fighters of the team, which she wouldn’t go to because that’s not her role. This meeting, though, was scheduled as “Originals plus the newly appointed leaders only.” She’s an original.
SHE IS AN ORIGINAL.
SHE. IS. AN. OG.
AND YET, they remained in telling her she wasn’t invited because “The Baby Avenger doesn’t need to join big kid conversation.”
She locked eyes with her adopted father and her best friend, aka Peter Parker, aka the only reason she knew this meeting was still being held.
Poor, lovely Peter. He grew confused when his best friend wasn’t sitting in between Mr. Stark and him for the meeting, especially when the officials referred to the meeting as they did. He was just there to take notes for Mr. Stark, not that the man wouldn’t remember it all. Pepper thought it’d be a good idea if Tony had written evidence to anything said in these meetings so that he wouldn’t be pouring statements out of his ass without proof, and poor, lovely Peter got elected to take such notes.
When he noticed you weren’t there, he had sent you a text asking where you were and that your drink that he brought you was right next to him.
“(Y/N)! It is so great to see you, my wonderful flower.” Thick arms wrapped around her as a golden man squeezed her tight to him. Thor and (Y/N) had a special relationship. They’re always close and do the most innocent of tasks together like flower crowns, step-by-step painting classes, and making those Tik Tok crocheted blankets made with that big yarn. He even had taken her to Asgard (back when it was a planet) for a royal ball where she was the guest of honor. They’re just soft together.
Though, rage blocked that softness that normally occurs between the two. Pushing off of him, she points her finger at the men in the front. The officials look like they’ve seen the devil and all of Hell and (Y/N) can see the fear pouring off of them.
“Let’s get this clear,” she says as she slowly stalks her way up to them. “I am an Avenger. I am an original Avenger. I know about 3,000 ways to kill you in this room at this very moment with anything. I drink tea with the fucking Queen on Thursdays, and I’ve created a better orphanage/school system in 2 years than this country has in the 250 years it’s been around. Don’t you EVER call me a fucking baby again, you fucking hear me?”
By this point, she’s right up in their faces, her glare unwavering and them sweating. The silence in the room was great and seemed to go on forever. The team held their breaths, some trying not to laugh and some scared of backlash that might be trust upon the girl.
With one last eye narrow (you could blindfold her with toothpicks at this point), she whips around and walks back to Thor, placing herself sideways on his lap and relaxing into his hold. Peter passes her (Drink Order) down the table, and (Y/N) takes it.
Clint, Bucky, and Sam try and hide their laughter when the meeting starts again as they look at their long-time teammate cradled and curled up in Thor’s arms, head on his shoulder and under his chin as she sips her drink with an angry look in her eyes and a pout on her face.
All wrapped up like a baby.
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ikemensweetheart · 4 years ago
Note
Hiiii I read your Ieyasu soulmate prompt, and was gonna ask if you could expand on it a little? Maybe include the warlords reacting to it? I just found it so adorable, but it’s alright if you’re not feeling up to it :))
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These two asks were along the same vain, so I decided to put them together... And ended up with a 2.5k fic.
A continuation of this post
_______
"Ieyasu, hey." You call out to the blond warlord when you see him in the hallway of Azuchi Castle. "Hey, Ieyasu!" You try to follow him, but he quickly disappears out of sight before you can catch up to him.
You let out a frustrated sigh as you slow to a stop. You had been trying to talk to him over the last several days.
It had been a couple weeks since your arrival in the Sengoku era and meeting Ieyasu, who as it turned out, was your soulmate. You hadn't said anything to him at first. You had been busy trying to adjust to your new living situation and the shock of your discovery, but now after having some time to process, you were trying to talk to him. However he was avoiding you like the plague.
"What's up with you, kitten?" You yelp in surprise at the sudden voice behind you intruding on your thoughts. You spin around to find Masamune and Hideyoshi standing behind you. "Are you alright, (Y/n)?" Hideyoshi asks. "Yeah. I'm fine." You say half-heartedly. "Really? Then why are you running after Ieyasu like a foal chasing its mother?" Masamune counters.
"Oh, um.. You saw that?" Your cheeks grew a little warm from embarrassment. "Yeah, it was kinda hard to miss, lass." Masamune chuckles in amusement at your reaction.
"So, what business do you have with him?" Hideyoshi inquires.
"Well…" You shyly pull back your right sleeve to reveal the zero boldly displayed on your arm. Its presence silently declaring that you had found your soulmate. Both warlords' eyes widen at the sight of it. 
Masamune then bursts out laughing. "I can't believe it! The porcupine finally found his soulmate."
"Interesting." Hideyoshi murmurs thoughtfully. Resting his chin in his hand. "Have you talked to him yet?"
"I've been trying," you explain. "But he won't even look at me. Let alone talk to me about something this life changing."
"Huh." Masamune mutters, he then casts a meaningful glance at Hideyoshi. "Looks like an intervention is needed here." 
"Indeed." the other man concurs. Your eyes widen as you look at both of them. "Wait, what?"
"Don't worry, lass. We got you covered." Masamune claps you on the shoulder with a huge grin on his face.
"Um… okay." You say reluctantly. Why did you have a bad feeling about this?
*****
The next afternoon, Hideyoshi and Masamune pay a visit to Ieyasu's palace.
"Ieyasu, we need to talk." Masamune declares, bursting into the other man's room and dropping himself in front of his desk.
Ieyasu looks up from the papers in front of him skeptically. "About what?" He asks, wary.
"It's about (Y/n)." Hideyoshi explains as he comes in and sits down beside Masamune. "Get out." Ieysu grumbles.
"Oh, no you don't, lad. We know the chatelaine is your soulmate." Masamune argues.
Ieyasu glares at both of them.
“Why haven’t you talked to her about it?” Hideyoshi asks calmly. “Not that it’s any of either of your business,” Ieyasu growls. “But I haven’t talked to her because I don’t want to. A soulmate will only get in my way. Now, leave me alone.” Ieyasu returns his attention to the work in front of him. Completely ignoring the other two warlords in the room.
The other men just stare at him for a moment, baffled by his statement. However, Ieyasu made it clear he wasn’t going to say anymore on the subject, so Hideyoshi and Masamune had no choice but to leave his room.
As they walk out of the palace, Masamune mutters. “I knew he had a stick up his butt, but I didn’t think it went that far.”
“This is troubling.” Hideyoshi concurs. “We need a way to get Ieyasu to at least talk to (Y/n). Preferably where no one can interrupt them.”
“But it would be easier to herd cats than get him to willingly go along with anything we come up with.” Masamune points out as they walk down the street towards the castle.
“What are you trying to get who to do?” Both men turn at the sound of a familiar voice. They see Nobunaga coming up the road behind them. “Lord Nobunaga.” Hideyoshi greets his lord with a bow. “We’re tryin’ to get Ieyasu to have a talk with (Y/n).” Masamune explains.
Nobunaga raises an eyebrow. “Why?” He asks.
Hideyoshi and Masamune give Nobunaga a quick summary of the situation.
“So, Ieyasu and our chatelaine are soulmates and Ieyasu is being his usual, stubborn self.” Nobunaga murmurs. “Interesting…”
“Any ideas on what to do, my lord?” Hideyoshi asks. “The solution is obvious.” Nobunaga replies. Masamune gives him a curious look. “Care to fill us in?”
Nobunaga gives them a wicked grin. “It’s really quite simple…”
******
“(Y/n), Lord Nobunaga wants you in the tenshu right away.” You look up from your work as Mitsunari comes into your room one morning. “What about?” You ask, this is an awfully sudden request coming from Nobunaga of all people. Mitsunari just shrugs in response. “He didn’t say.” He looks just as confused as you were. “He just said he wanted you to come to his quarters.”
This is suspicious. “Alright, I’m coming.” You get up from your seat and make your way up to the tenshu.
There, you find Nobunaga reclining in his seat. Across from him are Hideyoshi and… Ieyasu?!
“(Y/n), come in.” Nobunaga beckons you in when he sees you at the door.
Ieyasu’s head snaps around. He stares at you in shock before quickly turning back to Nobunaga. “What is she doing here?” He demands. You were wondering the same question yourself.
“I’ll get to that in a moment. (Y/n) come and sit down.” Nobunaga motions for you to sit next to Ieyasu.
You’re reluctant, but you obey. Walking over to where Ieyasu is, you sit down beside him. Tense and uncertain about the situation you suddenly found yourself in.
“Ieyasu.” Nobunaga begins to speak. “It has been brought to my attention that you have not been fulfilling your duties.” Ieyasu’s emerald eyes widen. “What are you talking about? I’ve been bogged down with paperwork, but it’s all been completed in a timely manner.”
“I’m not talking about your duties as a lord, I’m talking about your duties as a soulmate.”
Soulmate? How did Nobunaga know about that? The only people you had said anything about it were…
You glance behind you, Hideyoshi was still there. He had crept closer to you and Ieyasu while the latter was talking with Nobunaga. He just places a finger to his lips, signaling for you to keep quiet.
“Ieyasu, you are to spend the day with your soulmate.” You probably gave yourself whiplash with how fast you turned around to stare at Nobunaga in stunned silence. Could he really make that a command?
Ieyasu’s expression matches your own.
“I don’t have time for this nonsense.” He finally says after a moment. He goes to get up, but this is where Hideyoshi finally jumps in. With a clink, yours and Ieyasu’s wrists are bound together with about a foot and a half of chain in between you.
“What the heck?!” You yell.
“What is this?!” Ieyasu shouts.
“Since you won’t cooperate, you leave us no choice but to take extreme measures, Ieyasu.” Hideyoshi explains. “But don’t you think this is a bit too extreme?” You counter. “Not when it comes to this one, no.” Hideyoshi gestures toward Ieyasu. Who glowers at him in return.
“Ieyasu, this is an order.” Nobunaga gives Ieyasu a stern look. “You are to stay at your soulmate’s side until the moon rises. That will be all.” With a wave of his hand, Nobunaga dismisses the two of you with an annoyingly smug look on his face.
Grumbling under his breath, Ieyasu turns and leaves the tenshu. Dragging you along behind him.
“Hey, slow down.” You say as you nearly trip in the hall. It was hard to keep up with him in the kimono you were wearing. “Why am I stuck with someone so slow?” Ieyasu mutters. “If you had been willing to talk to me instead of hiding away like a child, you wouldn’t be.” You shoot back.
Ieyasu scowls. “I am not a child.”
“You’re certainly acting like one.”
“If you didn’t insist on chasing me around I wouldn’t have to.” He argues.
“I was trying to have a conversation with you about something that affects both of our lives. You know, like adults are supposed to do.”
Ieyasu huffs and turns away from you, but he slows down his pace to better accommodate you.
There are several moments of silence between the two of you as you walked. The cold shoulder clearly wasn’t going to get you anywhere fast. So, you decide to speak up. “So, um. Is there anything you want to do?” You ask, maybe it’s time to be a little more civil. “I have work to do, you can stay quiet and still while I do so.” Or not.
“Wait a second-” You start to say.
“Nobunaga said to stay by your side, and that is what I am doing. We’re not going to act like friends and I have no interest in a relationship with you.” Ieyasu cuts you off as the two of you enter his palace. “But that’s what we need to talk about.” You try to tell him, but he is having none of it.
He just goes to his room, sits down and starts going over documents. Leaving you with little choice in the matter.
You both sit in silence as he reads through the paper, until he reaches for another parchment with the hand attached to you. “Whoa.” You tilt precariously forward as he yanks your arm along with him. “Careful.” You tell him. He just grumbles and continues his work.
However, the same thing happens again when he goes for another document. “Okay, this isn’t going to work this way.”
“And I suppose you have an alternative?” he gripes.
“Yeah, actually.” You scooch yourself up closer to him and hand him what he was reaching for. “There. Now on one is getting yanked around.”
“Thanks.” Ieyasu mutters reluctantly and continues his work.
The two of you continue in this manner, Ieyasu going over his documents, scribbling on them, setting the ones he finishes to one side and you hand him the next one. Working in a more comfortable silence that you had been before.
Until your stomach grumbles. Ieyasu gives you a sidelong look. “Was that you?” He snickers. “No.” You turn your head away from him, your cheeks growing warm, but you hear him chuckle.
Just then, there is a knock at the door. “My lord, I have lunch.” It was one of Ieyasu’s maids. “Come in.” Ieyasu replies. The maid opens the door. “Lady (Y/n) is still here, I see.” The maid notes. “It’s a good thing we prepared an extra meal.” The thoughtful maid motioned to another maid that was carrying another tray of food. “Thank you, that will be all.” Ieyasu dismisses the maids once they set the trays down.
They bow and make their exit. Leaving you and Ieyasu to your food. “It looks delicious.” You comment to Ieyasu. He just hums in response as he tucks into his own food.
You go to pick up your chopsticks, but your dominant hand is the one attached to Ieyasu. “Oh, uuh…” You give him an embarrassed look.
Ieyasu sighs. “Here.” He takes your chopsticks from you and picks up some of the food from your tray. “Open up.” he tells you. You stare at him in shock. Was he serious? Judging by the straight look on his face, he very much was.
Slow and uncertain, you open your mouth. He places the food in your mouth. “Now neither of us are getting yanked around.” He says, quoting your own words. You blink at him in surprise.
As you chew, he takes a bite of his own food and then gets another bite for you. The entire time he does this with a straight face.
When the two of you are finished and the maids come back to clear away your dishes, you decide to put in a request. “Can we go outside for some fresh air?”
“That would be a good idea.” He replies. “I’m honestly surprised you’re capable of more than one of those.”
“Hey!” You give him your best glare, but he just chuckles.
Wait, was he teasing you? Maybe he wasn’t such a butthurt afterall.
“I have something to do out there anyway.” The two of you get up. Ieyasu leads the way to the kitchen to get a large bowl of leafy greens and the two of you go out to the garden.
You take a deep breath and do a small stretch. “This garden is beautiful.” You say. Ieyasu just nods absently in agreement. You cast him a curious look. He seems to be looking for something. Just as you’re about to ask, you hear some of the bushes nearby.
“Ah, there she is.” He says. “Who?” You shield your eyes from the sun to try and get a better look.
A fawn emerges from the bushes. “Aw, she’s so cute.” You murmur.
“Wasabi!” Ieyasu calls out. “Lunchtime.” The fawn comes charging towards you. “Whoa!”
“Yikes!” You cry out as Wasabi collides with Ieyasu, sending him stumbling backwards. The force of the collision unbalances you and takes Ieyasu down with you. He lands on his back and you fall onto his chest.
“Oof.”
“Sorry.” You mumble, looking up. “Pfft, hahaha!” You burst out laughing at the sight of several large leaves resting in Ieyasu’s fluffy hair. “What?” He asks. “You have- haha- something in your hair.” You manage between your laughter. Ieyasu sighs as he shakes his head. “You are such a strange one.” A small chuckle escapes him.
The two of you sit up and Wasabi starts nibbling on the leaves in Ieyasu’s hair. You're still giggling.
“This… isn’t at all what I expected when I found out you were my soulmate” Ieyasu murmurs. “Really? What were you expecting?” You inquire.
“Back home, matters involving soulmates are usually more.. Formal.” He explains. “I didn’t want to bother with something so stuffy, but... this isn’t so bad.” he reluctantly concedes.
You smile at him. “Well, we can keep doing it like this if you want. Just the two of us getting to know each other.” You offer. Ieyasu nods. “I think i would like that…” He stares at you for a moment and you stare back at him.
“Now kiss!” You both jump at the sound of Masamune yelling. You look up to see Masamune, Hideyoshi, and Mitsunari all standing at the edge of the garden.
“What are you all doing here?” Ieyasu demands. “We came to check on how the two soulmates were doing, but it seems we were worried ‘bout nothing.” Masamune answers.
Meanwhile, Mitsunari’s eyes go wide in realization. “(Y/n) and Lord Ieyasu are soulmates? That’s wonderful news!” He beams. “Whaddya say we have a feast to celebrate them finally being together.” Masamune suggests. “An excellent idea.” Hideyoshi agrees.
“We’re not together!” Ieyasu yells at them.
Well, nothing was set in stone just yet.
_________
Thanks for reading. I hope you all enjoyed!
Stay Safe
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lyssismagical · 4 years ago
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64 and 3?
3 - “You’re cute when you’re worried.”
64 - “Did they hurt you?” 
  Nine days.
Peter had been missing for nine days.
No trace of him anywhere no matter how hard Tony and Harley tried. He was just gone.
And Harley is losing his mind.
“Harley, c’mon, let’s get you up to bed, alright? You can eat and sleep and then, in the morning, you can keep searching, okay? You can’t stop taking care of yourself just because-”
He doesn’t even bother peeling his eyes away from the screen in front of him, rolling with security footage, cutting off Pepper’s concern, “No. I need to finish going through the footage. I’ve got twelve more blocks of footage, about four dozen security cameras.”
“How long’s that going to take you?”
“I don’t know!” Harley knows he’s angrier than he should be. He’s irritated and flustered and desperate because his boyfriend is gone. He’s gone and Harley’s scared and the world feels like it’s ending. “I don’t know and I couldn’t care less! I’m going to go through the fucking footage no matter how long it takes me!”
Pepper’s face falls with a sigh, moving to sit down beside him. She’s got this sad smile on her face, sympathetic and pitying. “Harley, sweetheart, I know you want to help but combing through security footage that FRIDAY’s already scanned, isn’t doing any good.”
“What do you want me to do?” Harley demands, throwing his hands up in exasperation. “I don’t know what you want from me! I can’t just go to bed like everything’s fine, Pepper. I can’t- I don’t want to-”
She’s there, hands gentle and easy on his back, guiding him into a hug when he breaks, tears curling down his cheeks and breath hitching. He’s not okay, he’s so miserable, he wants Peter home and in his arms and safe more than anything.
“I know you’re scared, Harley, I get it. I’ve been in this situation before with Tony, he’s gone missing plenty of times before, but I promise, we’re doing everything we can. You’re not doing any good by working yourself to death down here.”
Harley lets out a pitiful sob, wishing more than anything that Peter were the one holding him instead, that he could breathe in Peter’s cinnamon body wash or the vanilla shampoo he uses. He wishes that he could feel Peter’s warmth, arms always so strong and tight around him, shorter and lean and right.
“I want him home,” Harley says, incapable of stopping himself from the pleading desperation that leaks from his tone. “I want him home and safe and here and with me.”
“I know, sweetheart, I know you do, we all do. But right now, all we have to do is wait.”
* Harley spends the night in Peter’s bed where he’s been exiled until at least seven in the morning. FRIDAY’s watching him to make sure he doesn’t set foot in the lab or the office. He barely eats the food May offers, and eventually he can’t take the awkward small talk and locks himself in Peter’s room.
The bed still smells like Peter. Like cinnamon and vanilla and the vaguest hint of gunpowder and blood from the nights he drops into bed with his suit on after patrols. His blankets are all rumpled from the last time he slept in them, ten days ago, one of them on the floor, one pillow cover stained with what looks like blood on the underside.
It’s the closest thing Harley’s got to Peter.
He doesn’t sleep all night, curled up in Peter’s bed, alternating between crying and trying not to cry. He drifts off a few times, but never for long. He can’t stop thinking about Peter, wherever he may be, if he’s even alive.
Eventually, though, seven in the morning rolls around and he finally leaves Peter’s room, clutching one of Peter’s hoodies to his chest. It’s too small to fit him comfortably, Peter’s a decent half foot shorter and Harley’s shoulders are a lot broader, but he needs to be able to feel like Peter’s close, like he’s safe.
“Anything?” he asks as soon as he sees Tony, Pepper, and May in the kitchen.
They all look up, eyes sad and mouths set in firm lines, echoing expressions of misery.
May’s the one that speaks. “Nothing right now, honey. You want breakfast?”
“Coffee?” his voice is shaking and high. “I’m not hungry.”
“You didn’t eat last night-” Pepper starts but Tony shakes his head. A silent conversation passes through them and Harley assumes they’re arguing whether or not it’s worth it to try to make him eat breakfast.
Eventually, though, it goes quiet and May passes over a mug of coffee. Almost immediately, Harley has to put the mug down, breath hitching.
Peter’s Graduation Mug.
“Oh, honey, I’m sorry-” May says, already reaching to take the mug back but Harley’s quick to grab it first, cradling it close to his chest almost protectively.
“It’s ‘kay. Thanks.”
Tony goes to say something, probably to excuse himself back to the lab, when a cellphone rings.
They all go fumbling for their phones, but it’s Harley’s.
“Hello?” His voice is too high, too broken like he’s expecting it to be the worst news.
“Harley?” It’s Peter. He sounds upset, hurt, tired more than anything. “I, uh, I escaped but I don’t know if they’re following me still. I found a payphone and this lady lent me the coins for a call. I just wanna come home, Harls, please- I- I don’t know where I am, but I- I-”
Harley sinks to the floor, phone cradled to his ear. “Did they hurt you? Are you okay? You’re not- You’re not dyin’ on me, are you?”
“I’m okay. Just get Fri to track the call and come get me please. I want to come home and take the world’s longest nap with you. Please, Harls.”
He waves at Tony, who’s hovering over him with the other two adults, and points at his phone, nodding when Tony mouths Peter?
“Of course, honey, I’ll find you, don’t you worry. I love you.”
“Location Found,” FRIDAY says, voice a comforting lilt. “Coordinates have been uploaded to GPS systems. Near Wilmington, Delaware.”
Harley lets out a pathetic sob of relief, drawing his knees up to his chest, phone pressing harder into his ear. “Give us like two hours, okay? And we’ll be there. Can you do two hours?”
“Okay.” Peter somehow manages to sound even more miserable, voice trembling. “I love you too.”
“I promise. Two hours tops.”
It’s hard to hang up the phone on Peter. Peter who’s scared and alone, two states over, probably hurt and tired and alone. But the moment he hangs up, he’s quick to jump into action, the faster he moves, the sooner he can get to Peter.
“I’m driving,” Pepper says, grabbing the keys from the counter before Harley can reach them.
“I need- I-”
May settles a hand on his shoulder, shaking her head. “He’s going to be fine, Harley, but you’re not in a good headspace to drive. Let Pepper drive.”
He’s still holding his phone, Peter’s sweater bunched up in one arm and mug balancing in one hand which Tony gently pries from his grip, and he pulls the sweater up to his face, breathing evenly to try to calm the erratic hammering of his heart.
May guides him forward and he lets her, goes willingly, until he’s being pushed into a seat, buckle clicking closed. He gets passenger somehow while May and Tony take the backseat.
By the time they’re leaving New York, Tony and May have both passed out, sleeping soundly for the first time in over a week. Pepper’s back is straight, face set in determination as she picks up the pace on the backroads.
Harley finally feels like he’s waking up. “He escaped on his own. Ran away.”
Pepper looks over briefly, offering a small smile. “Yeah, I’m not too surprised. I’m just scared for the day people don’t underestimate him.”
“I just wish this would stop happening… Somedays, I wish I could just tell him to hang up the suit and not look back, to stop putting his life in danger, to stay home and stay safe. I don’t know what I would do if I lost him.”
“Trust me, we all wish we could ask him the same thing. But the truth is, he wouldn’t listen to us. Spider-Man is the most important thing in the world to him, we can’t change his mind as much as we’d sometimes like to.”
* Pepper barely has the chance to slow down before Harley’s throwing himself out of the car.
“Peter!” he shouts, voice rough and hoarse from the lump in his throat.
His boyfriend is laying in the grassy hill behind the payphone he’d called from. He’s only wearing a pair of loose grey sweatpants, chest and feet bare. His hair is greasy and tousled, eyes only half-open, heels digging into the dirt.
He lifts his head, though, when Harley calls for him, and he offers a lazy smile.
Tripping over the sidewalk, Harley barely manages to make it to Peter, racing up to the hill and dropping to his knees at his boyfriend’s side.
Up close, Harley can really see the damage, though.
Cuts and bruises paint their way up Peter’s torso, covering him in every hue of the rainbow. There’s a deep gash by his temple that steadily bleeds down the side of his face. His wrist is cradled against his chest, arm wrapped around his stomach, one eye swollen nearly shut.
“Oh god,” Harley breathes, hands hovering uselessly between them. “I thought you said you were okay! I swear to god, Peter, I- We should call a Quinjet, get you to a doctor, we should’ve just brought Cho with us, made it easier. Are you sure you can last two hours in the car? What happened? Does it hurt? I-”
Peter lets out a laugh, tapering off into coughs at the end but still there and just as bright as ever. “You’re cute when you’re worried. I swear, I’m okay, Harley. Tired, sore, starving, but okay. Look, the worst of it’s already healing.”
It’s true. The gash on his head is slowly stitching its way together, wrist straightening out again. His healing will take care of the rest by the time they make it home anyway.
Harley tugs Peter into his arms, wary of the wounds, and peppers the safe parts of his face in kisses. “Thank god, don’t you dare do that to me again, I was worried sick about you!”
“I’m okay, Harley, really. You can relax. I’m safe.”
Finally, Harley feels like he can breathe, holding Peter in his arms, being able to kiss him and breathe him in and feel his warmth, instead of the sweater he’d been using to pretend. He doesn’t smell like vanilla and cinnamon anymore, more how he normally smells when he drops into bed after a patrol, but he’s still Peter. He’s still here. He’s still in Harley’s arms, where he’s meant to be.
“How about that nap, huh? We’ve got two hours in the car to catch up and then all the time in the world when we get home.”
Peter smiles, a little dopey and too happy for somebody who’d been held captive for nine days, but Harley would give anything to see that smile for the rest of his life. “Sounds perfect, Harls.”
“I love you,” Harley says because he doesn’t want to go another minute without making sure Peter knows.
“I love you more.”
Harley laughs, pressing a long kiss to his boyfriend’s forehead. “I seriously doubt that, but I’ll let you win this one.”
He’d be happy if Peter won every time as long as he gets to hear it.
Taglist: @littlemissagrafina  @spidey-reids-2003  @romeoandjulietyouwish @c-artara @shadedrose01 @likeaphoenix13 @pj-hermes-tonystark-obsessed  @you-get-killed-walk-it-off @kitkatwinchester  @emo-girl10 @justme--emily  @hold-our-destiny @imalivebecauseirondad @spiderman-peterman @dykeragee @maryserrao @heeeyitskay @parknerandirondad @lilacsandlilies4 @loveliestdisappointment {Let me know if you wanna be added or removed}
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bakugous-bitch-boi · 4 years ago
Text
BNHA AND G/T STORY
So I wrote this back in January for Amino and thought "Hey I have a Tumblr now, why not post it there?" So yeah thats what I'm doing-
For reference the borrower in this story is my OC Thomas. He's not explicitly BNHA related but I just thought it'd be cool to see him in that universe so I slapped a quirk on him and did what I usually do with him.
Throw him into danger-
Anyways uh yeah so enjoy the short story- if enough people like this one I'll continue it and it can be a series UwU
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They were barely audible inside the colorfully decorated dorm room, the tiny steps only just being heard above the natural ambiance of the building's various series of ventilation. The source of the tiny steps was also similarly barely detectable, wirh the noise originating from the movement of a young borrower boy named Thomas who’s height only just reached a measly one inch. The boy also made sure to stay as low to the ground beneath him as he possibly could to eliminate the easy viewing of his silhouette against the cream colored wall behind him. Granted, the terrain the child was walking on was a flat one dotted with figures around three times his size at their smallest of a man he didn’t recognize, so their was ample space to hide in case the inhabitant of the room decided to return.
Thomas was used to this sneaking around, he had been doing it ever since he was born after all, it was just how borrowers made it in the world. However this time was different from every other living arrangement he had found himself in. His last travel companion had abandoned the young child in the bitter cold around a week ago, leaving the kid to fend for himself. It was something new for Thomas, and already seven days in he had made up his mind that he didn’t like it. The world had always appeared scary, again that was just a prerequisite for being a borrower born into a world where eighty percent of humans are born with the most terrifying abilities, however being near someone always managed to make it better for Thomas. Without that extra layer of an adult's protection, simple acts like going mere meters away from his hole-in-the-wall home seemed like the most daunting thing imaginable.
The child had tried his best to limit his borrowing activities due to this extra fear, however that was something a lot easier said than done. When Thomas had clambered inside the closest building for protection that stormy night, he quickly realized that no matter where he decided to make a home inside said structure he’d be without one resource or another. He found that the layout of the building was fairly simple, it was almost like a square ring that held a garden in its center with a open indoor room flanking this courtyard on the first floor which was followed by the floors above split into a hallway and several other smaller rooms, however no one place in the large building had everything he needed. His old traveling friends had shown him what objects were most essential to gather, and while some were easily found if he went to the right spaces like cloth or tape other’s like the basics of food and water were incredibly scarce no matter where he went. Or, in the areas where they could be found easily, they were guarded by “quirked” humans which essentially made them inaccessible unless he was able to wait for the human to leave. Some rooms were completely off limits in fact due to said quirked beings having particularly terrifying, in one case quite literally explosive, predispositions. This left Thomas’ options severely limited and obviously made his life ten times more difficult, however he had managed it so far and was able to get things down to a pretty consistent routine.
Thomas’ steps remained quiet and his body close to the ground as he reached his final source of resources for the day, after he grabbed this he would be able to try his best to fall asleep. Granted, this resource wasn’t necessary or even a particularly consistent one, however the child’s sweet tooth obviously couldn’t resist a lazily opened and forgotten chocolate bar when it was so close to his space inside the wall. He approached the candy from an untouched side still kept snuggly inside it’s wrapper, however tearing into said wrapping to get the freshest piece would make his presence incredibly obvious so doing so was completely out of the question. He was pushing his luck even going for the candy in general to begin with. His head swiveled towards the door as he slowly reached the opened side of the candy bar which lead him to leave the safe area behind the assorted colorful plastic figures and make his way out in the open. He noticed the sound of people approaching the room he had situated himself in, easily recognizing one of the voices as the teenage inhabitant of the space. His eyes grew as he heard the distinctive sound of speech, he had to make this as quick as possible. The fluffy haired borrower darted over to the exposed and somewhat mangled chocolate and bent down on his knees, his feet slipping the slightest bit on the slick wood of the dresser he had been sneaking around on. He grabbed a small piece of metal he had gathered in his travels from the sack strung over his shoulder which he then drove into a chunk of relatively untouched but still exposed chocolate. He used what little arm strength his young arms had built up to saw a lump of chocolate away from the rest of the bar which he then wrapped in a bit of shredded wax paper he had gathered from one of the rooms. He was quick about the whole action of cutting the chunk and then wrapping it up, so when he stood up and noticed that the voices were still firmly outside he was only a little surprised.
He took those few seconds of breathing room to look up at the wall behind him, his eyes trailing up the massive poster that spread across it which was slightly obscured due to his viewpoint. The poster was of the same man in a colorful outfit that the many figures and other posters in the room depicted, however despite him being so abundantly shown in the small space Thomas was always drawn to this one particularly large image. He didn’t know why, after all the sight of a human was hardwired in a borrower's brain to be like looking at death itself, but the aura the man gave off was similar to that of the adult borrowers he had been traveling with all six years of his life. Maybe it was just the smile of the man in the image or simply the colors he adorned himself with, but the past few seven days spent in the terrifying collection of horror filled rooms was made just a little brighter and easier when he was met with the warmth of this particular poster. His eyes were lost, so lost that the movement of him slinging the pack over his shoulder once more was slowed and without haste. As he looked up a childishly pure smile grew on his tiny face, a smile that was unaware of the motion of an opening door behind him and the sounds of rising voices and shuffling feet until the very last second.
When Thomas finally turned around after breaking himself away from the happiness of the poster, he was greeted with a sight that would take the smile off of even the most grizzled borrowers face. He saw the boy who inhabited the room standing in the doorway, and while his silhouette did not appear too imposing when considering the other people living in the building, he was still a human with a much more capable build than most typically had. At first Thomas’ heart hitched in his chest as he immediately assumed he was seen and therefore completely finished, however after a second of looking he noticed the boy was busily scrolling through his phone and thusly hadn’t noticed the tiny child staring at him in terror on his dresser. The tiny boy wasted no time after realizing he was safe, and with one push from his little legs he sprinted over to the zigzagging crack in the wall just big enough for him to squeeze through. He didn’t focus on keeping hidden, he didn’t focus on staying quiet, all he saw in those few heart wrenching seconds was his sliver of hope and safety. As he ran he heard an audible “Hmm?” from the freckled green haired teen who had apparently noticed the sound of rushing tiny steps and the puny silhouette of a minuscule boy sprinting for safety. While he heard the sound, Thomas didn’t stop. He kept running, pushing his speed higher and higher with every step, determined not to get captured. While he tried his best to stay calm, his breath couldn’t help but quicken and tears managed to loosen from the corners of his eyes. He could see the gentle glow of his quirk beginning to activate around him through blurred teary eyed vision, however he managed to push down his body's instinctual urge to protect his young, fragile self so he could focus on getting back into his hiding spot.
He launched himself into the cracked space cutting through the wall, his body scraping against the tight jagged sides, tearing at his baggy self-made shirt and cutting up his skin. He didn’t care about the slight pain in that moment however, instead he was concerned with making sure it looked like absolutely nothing strange or out of the ordinary was happening behind the small hole in the wall. The child gathered himself and the few belongings he had before pushing them all against the side of the tight space just out of view from someone looking in, he himself sitting against the drywall with his head tucked into his folded arms to look as small and inconspicuous as possible. The inviting shine of his quirk appeared once more as he felt the teens presence just outside his miniature room, the thought of him peering in looking for an intruder to destroy with glee only forcing out more pitiful tears from the young boys eyes and the continued growth of his quirks effect. He stayed quiet however, not letting a sound slip from his tiny mouth as he waited for the teen to either pass him by or try and find a way to get to the quivering borrower.
After a few tense moments, the massive green haired teen reluctantly decided that the noise he had heard shuffling across his dresser was just in his head, leading him to walk off over to his bed. In the new, less pressured silence Thomas was able to let his rising emotions out as much as he wanted to in the form of quiet stuttering sobs. By this point his quirk had fully activated and created a bubble-like shield around him as it was supposed to do when he was in danger, and behind the glowing force field the tiny child tried to calm himself down as best as he was able to after his perceived brush with death. As his hands trembled he went to grab his makeshift pack, his fingers nimbly curling around the small wrapped piece of chocolate he had borrowed mere moments ago. He didn’t want to waste the sweet substance so quickly, however the poor kid rationalized that he was scared enough to deserve munching on the cocoa flavored chalk. He took small, feeble bites, only stopping to let loose another hiccuping sob.
After all, what was a tiny kid to do under such heart-stopping pressure?
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redxblueihateloveyou · 4 years ago
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spill the yoi hot takes :o
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I’m really flattered with the amount of asks (I hope you won't mind that I combined at least 5, it's just easier this way), interested in my yoi opinions, I wasn’t planning to get into that honestly, until I mentioned it to my friend Alex (I’ve mentioned him here before without a name tho, he’s gay, he’s very into anime, he was also the one behind that 4am text “but how do u think Rin’s teeth feel on Haru’s dick” lol). 
I just didn't want to rewatch it, as I've said before, but something he said got me very intrigued and last week ended up with me staying until 7am for a virtual watch party that got pretty hilarious, but not for the yoi reasons lol.
So just know that to be completely fair we did it and I'm saying everything below with a very fresh impression, which hasn't changed really bc like I'm 25, I was watching it the first time when I was 21, not 14 xD. I think it got worse actually.
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Once again, I know that since they’re both gay sports animes comparisons are inevitable, but to me one has nothing to do with the other and no matter the fact that I adore Free! and don’t like YOI, I don’t want to throw words like smth is “superior” out there, bc I don’t want to be like those YOI fans back in the days, who thought that none other gay ships should exist after this (unless they say smth specifically for me to counterattack, then I can say whatever lol).
Like if you love stories like this, it’s okay. Like what you like. But to yell at everybody that they must think that this is how relationships should be and trash every other gay ship in existence, you maybe should not, especially when you don’t really have much to be proud of. Just like kisses don’t make a love story high-quality, full censorship doesn’t take away a good love story.
"Heaven official’s blessing” is also censored, but no matter how much you censor it, their love for each other is seen in their actions so clear, that it is in fact will not take anything away from the power of their feelings and the greatness of their love story if at the end they won’t show them kissing. Just like if I kiss a random stranger on the street, it won’t make us the best couple in the world.
Now I went into watching YOI unbiased the 1st time I watched it (I did watch it after Free, bc it was in “recommended”). I did not expect it to be “like Free”, I just wanted smth that’ll give me the same kind of emotion, investment in the story, ship, etc. It didn’t, so I just moved on.
I didn’t even think deep about why. I thought I just grew out of the “Cinderella” stories a long time ago or as it was here not very gracefully called “how to turn the pig into the prince”.
Like if you want the “she’s all that” but with the boy instead of a girl, you’ll probably enjoy YOI. But once again, love stories I enjoy are the opposite of those. It's really nothing bad, if you enjoy the stuff like “Someday my prince will come” in whatever age tbh, but I since a certain age just wasn’t invested in those anymore and began to obsess with stories like “Anastasia” instead, and I’m talking about love stories with less naivety in between and feelings out of nowhere, but more stuff like “yes, bitch, I find you attractive, true, but whether I fall for you unconditionally or not, only real life situations will tell later on”.
And I don’t mean stuff like going through war together or some epic journey, but grown ups must know those. Those life situations or even tiny things someone do, that make you not only fall for someone, but think “yeah, I can imagine my life with you”.
Like in my humble opinion, you can’t fall in love with someone bc of the way they swim or skate, for example. What ppl call “love at first sight” is in fact “attraction at first sight”. So yes, we do joke about Rin falling in love at first sight, bc he did in fact walked into the hall, saw Haru and was like “dat bitch is so fine”, even tho he was just standing there, but once again, he was just attracted to him. What happens after this is you can go on a whole beautiful journey with tiny Rin putting together the prettiest puzzle of why he falls for Nanase Haruka. In such little things like when Haru slowed down when he saw Nagisa feeling bad during running and Rin was like “omg you’re so uwu”, how he mentions that he always helps ppl, but never asks for help himself, he slowly gradually paints a picture of what kind of person Haru is, same goes for Haru about Rin. And then you have a whole story of them falling for each other all over again when they’re already adults, and you again watch it through their eyes, and once again I’m not in fact talking about some grand gestures like 1x12, I’m talking about stuff like them focusing on Haru’s eyes shaking, when he saw that Rin secretly helps Rei to learn how to swim. It’s the little things, that you watch and you get why they feel what they feel for each other. And that also makes you fall in love more with their characters by seeing how the other sees them.
YOI doesn’t have those moments. Not only they weren’t in any situations that would make them know each other for who they really are, they hardly even know the basic info about one another. Hell, the viewer doesn’t know anything about them. And this is why to me it goes into the category of those typical romcoms I can’t get invested in.
So I don’t think these two can be compared. And while some yell “bc you’re not canon, but yoi is canon”, I think they can’t be compared for another reason. Bc some ppl are trying to prove to me that a 27 years old man fell head over heels in love with someone overnight during a drunk banquet, then watched a vid of him skating and flew to another country and hey “if you win a gold medal, lets get married”. This is not the kind of relationship progression I’m looking for like at all. Between that time he started training him and their “censored kiss” there was nothing and I mean nothing that’d made me go “yeah, I see why he loves him”.
But anyways, lets live piecefully really, you can like one, you can like both, it’s all okay.
Like I know many have ptsd and it’s true that back when YOI was popular, most of their fans for real did annoy to death almost everyone, bc they yelled that No.6 is trash, when someone said “but you’re not the only one gay story that’s not based on sex”. They yelled that Free! has no right to exist bc its queerbating (LOL). By that time, I’m not gonna lie I was ready to poke my eyes out each time I saw smth YOI related, bc it was like: you make a multigay shipping vid -  “how dare u not include YOI”, you make a gifset - “you forgot YOI” like I HAD TO like it just bc it’s gay. There is no such rule to me. Just like I don’t care for some hetero romances, I don’t care for some gay romances. Simple is that. Once again gay has nothing to do with the relationships dynamic and the story.
Yeah, comments about fanservice. Like why should I watch Victor’s naked ass for several minutes every episode, but don’t get to see Haru or Rin’s at least once? So salty rn.
Free is more fanservice-y.. well, it’s hella fanservicy, yes, but like we can’t swim in shirts, you can tho not show naked ass in each episode, I thought you were skating. 
See, it’s all debatable.
But I do wish ppl stop putting yoi relationships on a piedestal, their relationship are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too far from being inspirational for many and not even close to the what love is in my opinion. If you seek smth of a very high standart of gay love, choose MDZS for example, idk. But don’t throw YOI at ppls faces as a “this is how should be”. Not everyone wants that.
I don’t need a half-assed engagement and esp the censored kiss (like either do it or don’t do it at all honestly). Also stuff like this should carry weight. I don’t want things for the sake of things.
Like to me Rin’s “the only thing that hasn’t changed in my life is how I feel about you” speech, considering the fact that he felt like that throughout all those years, means hella more, than this. 
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I think 1stly, it’s because of the “it’s like it was a destiny xD” factor and 2ndly, bc at least this scene gives a little more sense to the fact that he flew to another country to train him. Now it’s if “I fell MADLY in love in one drunk night and was pining my whole life after that and that vid was a sign for me to go see you again” makes any sense to you. At least that’s how some fans read it.
Once again it might be a good thing for a passable one-time romantic comedy. But plots and pairings like this is what made me turn to anime in the first place, so.. sorry lol.
All this mega tragic posts of “Victor was soooo in love for such long time, it’s so sad” made me laugh so hard. Like he feel in love so hard during a one drunk banquet with a guy who was so drunk he didn’t remember anything he did? WHY? HOW? what could he possibly do to make him fall that hard, no one knows. Like to me the only reason u can fall for someone in one night is if you saw him risking his life saving a kitten or a puppy from a car or smth.
I’m just not the kind of person who thinks you can fall for someone for no reasons. Again, you can find someone attractive and go from there, but there must be things along the way that will make me believe in the progression of it. It can of course all come in the future, but the story was what the story was. Whatever you are trying to add to it is already a fanfiction.
YOI is not boring per se, bc everything goes way too fast and sometimes with no reasoning, so I was more surprised that “this was it?” lmao. But their relationships are dull, yes. Bc there is nothing to even discuss really, you can only assume things, bc the whole thing didn’t give u much, esp in the characters department. It’s just really funny to me that someone would write a whole post of “I love this character bc I presume he’s like that”, usually it’s “I love this character bc facts, facts, facts”.
______
Now back to the beginning of my post and to the funny story that happened. We were randomly discussing shit, when I mentioned about possibly rewatching YOI, bc I didn’t want to start talking about smth in case I forgot some stuff (I didn’t btw lol) and turned out that he freaking disliked it a lot. I never even asked, for some reason, and we’ve been yelling about Free! and other stuff for ages and like his boyfriend is in love with Sousuke and they both adore rinharu to death.
And he has lots of gay friends who love Free (this made me happy the most, btw during our YOI chat I asked and it was 4:1 harurin:rinharu haha I win) and some ships from Haikyuu too, but turns out that literally none of them were into YOI. And the funniest thing he said was “bc it felt more heterosexual than some heterosexual stories I’ve watched”. Now I don’t know if it would make sense to anyone else out there, but I kinda did get what he meant.
I asked if it was bc of the “fairytale setting” and the fact that no one cared that they’re gay (bc “in front of the stadium?!” was the reaction, when I told them “there was a cencored kiss here” (btw not everyone got it lolz) and then “did they just write the story with a girl, but then changed it by the end?”), but they said “no, just the overall feeling”.
And like everyone knows that YOI targeted audience is hetero girls. It wasn’t made for the sake of the LGBT community and none of the homophobic ppl will watch it either, no matter what some think. So for whom they did it the way they did it is very questionable tbh. They say it’s the LGBT representation in anime, and yes, good, great, always happy about, but isn’t it kinda funny that some of LGBT representatives don’t even feel like it apparently.
Now I’m just saying some, I’ve asked him to ask around out of curiousity, and it was only 11 gay guys in total, who watched it, including our company and his bf who was forced into it haha, but 11 is quite a lot, considering the fact that not even 1 liked it. But then somehow stuff like MDZS and even uncanonical mikayuu was highly appreciated and loved, bc it accidentally made a dent in some extra conservative parents and dull ppl.
It’s just much more interesting to hear what guys who are actually dating guys think about all those kind of animes and ships, than some girls here who yell at me stuff like “why are you supporting queerbating”. Btw I asked Alex if he’s offended by that, he said “no, but we for real think they’re doing it” lmao.
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It is supposed to be funny. You didn’t get it wrong. But if you saw many ppl would aggressively disagree with you. I just thought that “analysis” was an “interpretive process that draws conclusions from a set of facts”, not “writing a fanfiction based on assumptions”, but then again to each their own. 
The problem is that I don’t even get what’s cute about it, it’s just absurd to me. Like it’s pulled out of an ass, for real. They’re not in the stage of a relationships, when I would find such thing romantic. And all the agressive denying of the fact that it was indeed wedding rings made this scene cringy, too. The whole thing is cringy to me idk. The “win the gold, only then we’ll get married”.... It all gave me a weird feeling. The opposite of “touching”.
So in conclusion, when you skip most of the important parts of the love story and jump into stuff just for the sake of it, then also make fun of it, it leaves a hella weird impression and aparently not just to me.
And once again trying to market some primitive story as an epic love story, just bc it’s gay is extremely weird to me. If you make 50 shades of grey gay, it’s not gonna suddenly become a pulitzer prize winning kind of book, it’ll stay the same dumb af story with dumb af characters, but gay.
So being happy about some representation (and btw they still managed to add stuff like “its not gay if you exchange rings with your hommies” here and there and make it “hahahaha joking”), I get it, but to say that this what all the gay ships should aim for, pls stop. We really don’t wanna. Sincerelly. 
We here stick to a motto “I can picture the kiss of the characters whose story is so amazing, that the kiss is the only thing missing, but if I basically have just a picture of two guys kissing, I won’t write a whole story myself.”
P.S. I will forever laugh now tho at the fact that calling your bf a “pig” and being an arogant asshole without any canonically established reasonings is a great relationships, but Adam with his past gets what he gets now for the “dog” comments even tho his bf enjoys it lmao like I did not remember this bits in YOI. I honestly thought it was like completely “unproblematic” one, but it’s like hilariously not. So what ppl are trying to even put out their as a “pinnacle of the lgbt representation” as you say, like there are for real older yaois that are much better than this.
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fullmetalscullyy · 4 years ago
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!! Could I have that “where’s the medic” prompt with riza and one of the kid characters? 🥺👉👈
hi anon!! i am so sorry that this took me so long to write!! i hope you enjoy it 🥺 and thank you for sending in the prompt <33
rated: t | words: 1896 | tags: parental riza, angst with a happy ending, gunshot wound, blood and injury, guilt
read on ao3
He shouldn’t have even been there. Riza had her reservations about allowing Alphonse to join the mission, however he was an adult and could make his own decisions. She chalked it up to her slight overprotectiveness towards him, after all he’d been through in life already. He could have easily hung back and remained on the side-lines, however Al insisted.
Her concerns were voiced, and the team readily listened and accepted them. They trusted her authority on security details. Riza was only concerned for Alphonse’s safety, however, she could recognise when to take a moment to pause and gauge how much of her fears may be erring on the side of being slightly irrational. Still, it was better to be safe than sorry, Riza thought as she dismissed her self-doubt.
It also didn’t stop her from being hyper aware of their surroundings at all times or on the look-out for any potential dangers. She kept quiet about her increased protective detail, shouldering the responsibility alone and taking it even more seriously when a bad feeling suddenly started to coil inside her gut halfway through the mission. Riza always trusted her gut, so when something did begin to feel off, she started walking towards Al and opened her mouth to suggest moving away from their current position.
But Riza hadn’t been quick enough.
When Riza saw Alphonse fall to the ground after a muffled pop there were no thoughts of ‘I was right’. Only pure horror. Bile accompanied that fear when she witnessed a red stain blossoming on his crisp white shirt. It spread like ink soaking into paper.
“We need a medic!” Riza yelled over her shoulder as she started to run.
People scrambled behind her and were barking orders but Riza was completely focussed on Alphonse. The world slowed and it felt as though she couldn’t get to him fast enough. The painful feeling of her knees crashing to the ground was never felt. Instead, all that was present was terror and the sickening feeling of Alphonse’s blood sliding between her fingers as she put pressure on his wound. She cradled the back of his head to protect it from hitting off the concrete beneath them repeatedly as his body jerked and heaved with choked breaths.
“Easy, Al,” Riza commanded firmly while encouraging him to lie as still as he could. Her tone was much calmer than it should have been. It sounded as if she was trying to soothe him after a small abrasion, something small and insignificant, instead of a gunshot wound. It was too relaxed compared to what was inside of her. Riza’s stomach was roiling and her mind was going into overdrive as it went through the motions of trying to stabilise Al as quickly and as best she could.
She’d been in the field and had seen her fair share of gunshot trauma. Riza was intimately familiar with the effects of those types of wounds, however it never got any easier to witness. It was exceptionally difficult when it was someone she knew. A close friend. A young man who’d gone through so much already and who was on the road to recovery. This would set him back and slow his progress. Guilt gnawed on her stomach painfully.
Riza put more pressure was put on the wound and Alphonse groaned. A whimper passed by his lips and Riza’s heart broke in two.
“Al?”
His head rolled in place and his eyes opened. They were unfocussed as he blinked slowly.
“Al, can you hear me?”
“Yes.” It was a broken whisper, almost a whine, but it was a response, nonetheless.
“Al, I’m right here, okay?”
“Lieu…” He couldn’t even finish the word.
“That’s right. It’s Hawkeye. It’s Riza.”
“It hurts,” he whimpered.
“I know, Al. I know.” Riza wasn’t sure what compelled her to reach over and brush his fringe off his forehead and place a comforting hand on his forehead, but she felt it was both warranted and needed for the two of them. “I’m so sorry.”
He groaned and his eyes closed.
“Al? Stay with me, please.” Her voice cracked as she spoke her request. She wouldn’t lose him to this. He had so much more to do and give to the world. He was one of the brightest boys she knew, and Riza refused to let that shining light go out. Not on her watch.
“Where’s the medic?” Her demand was an agitated yell this time. She was breaking down.
“Right here, sir,” a voice replied close by her ear. Riza didn’t even turn to look at them. She simply moved aside and let them in so they could administer treatment.
Riza latched onto Alphonse’s hand and gave it a squeeze.
“I’m still here, Al,” she called to him as the two medics efficiently worked over him. “Right here. I’m not going anywhere. You’re in good hands. They’re going to start working on you now, then we’ll get you to the hospital, all right?” Riza never even registered that her voice cracked while she spoke. Her relocation had resulted in Riza kneeling by Al’s head, so she placed her non-bloody hand back atop his forehead. She ran her hand over his hair to try and soothe him, watching critically as the medics worked to save him.
“Riza?” He sounded so small and childlike. Nothing like the grinning young man he’d grown into.
“Yes?” Her eyes snapped down to look at his golden ones. Alphonse’s face was drawn, and he grimaced and grunted in pain, but there was a tiny smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
“Thank you.”
Riza blinked down at Alphonse. His face scrunched up in agony and he let out a broken groan while his eyes squeezed tightly closed. Her chest tightened.
“Rest easy, Al. I’ve got you and I’m not going to leave your side.”
*          *          *           *          *           *           *          *          *           *          *
It was three days before she got the call.
“He’s awake.”
Relief washed over Riza in a wave. She exhaled slowly. It felt like if she moved too quickly she may unravel, so Riza kept her movements slow and controlled. Those two words were the ones she wanted to hear most, and it didn’t hit her until Edward told her just how badly she’d been waiting for them. Riza’s knees shook while standing on the phone.
“And?”
“He’ll be okay.” Edward sounded optimistic. There was a sprinkle of his exhaustion in there too, but overall he sounded pleased. “The doctors expect he will make a full recovery. It will just take a little time.”
Riza’s gut clenched. More time for Alphonse to spend in recovery. More of his life put on hold. If she’d been quicker, she could have spared him of that.
“Don’t blame yourself for this,” the Colonel had stressed, as if he could read her mind. Havoc had offered the same sentiment too. But Riza would. It was because of her that Alphonse was lying in a hospital bed with a gunshot wound. She had been tasked with his protection. She should have been more vigilant, taken more precautions, taken more back up with them to better cover the area.
“He’s been asking to see you. Al was wondering if you were all right.”
Riza took a deep breath. “I can come in, if he’d like?”
“I think that would be best. He’s worried about you, Lieutenant.”
“Me?” She scoffed in disbelief, wondering how on Earth Alphonse could possibly be worried about her.
“Yes. He wants to talk to you and see for himself that you’re all right. He –” Edward paused, and she heard him swallow. Riza gripped the phone tighter and wondered what could have possibly tripped him up. “Al remembers what happened. He remembers you talking to him throughout it.”
Riza’s heart thudded inside her chest.
“Well, I’ll let him tell you the rest. He wants to.”
“Okay. I’ll be there shortly. And thank you Ed.”
“For what?”
“For telling me that. And for phoning.”
“No problem, Lieutenant.”
*          *          *           *          *           *           *          *          *           *          *
Steeling herself, Riza took a deep breath and opened the door to Alphonse’s hospital room. Edward beckoning response was friendly and didn’t sound strained, so that counted for something. Still, Riza was unsure what would await her on the other side of the door. She’d seen Al malnourished and weak before but seeing him like that again… Riza didn’t want that for Alphonse. He deserved all the good things life had to offer him. He’d fought to get his body back and deserved time to live in it and use it to its fullest.
He was sitting up in bed. As soon as Al saw her, his face lit up with a grin. He looked tired and there were dark circles under his eyes, but he still had a friendly smile for her. “Hello, Lieutenant,” Al greeted warmly.
“It’s good to see you,” Edward added.
“Hi. It’s good to see you both too,” Riza replied.
“Come in, sit,” Ed beckoned. He stood from his chair and offered it to her. “I’ll give you two some time to talk,” Edward excused himself. The door was closed quietly behind him.
“How are you doing, Alphonse?”
“Doing okay,” he replied with a smile. “Getting better already.”
Riza couldn’t help but return his grin. It was always so bright and happy. But hers quickly fell as Riza’s guilt started to niggle in her mind. “Good, I’m pleased to hear it.”
“Lieutenant?”
She glanced over at him. Riza noted the look in his eyes. It was familiar, because she’d seen it on the faces of two of her co-workers already when they told her not to blame herself for what happened.
“I knew the risks going into this mission. I accepted that and still chose to go. That was on me.”
Riza wasn’t sure if she should be bothered by the fact that so many people seemed to be able to tell what she was thinking in regard to this situation.
“But I remember it all. I remember you talking to me and helping me through it, and I wanted to thank you in person for being there for me. It meant a lot to me.”
“Of course, Al,” she replied softly. “You’re welcome.”
“It was a big help and a nice comfort. I’m glad you were there,” he added softly.
Riza nodded, unable to offer him anything further.
“Make sure you get plenty of rest, okay?” Riza reached over and patted the back of his hand gently. “And go easy on your brother if he starts to fret.”
“Starts to fret?” Alphonse chuckled and Riza couldn’t help but join in. After witnessing Edward’s stress levels while they waited for Al to wake up, Riza didn’t doubt he’d already slipped into the protective older brother role once more and was hovering over Alphonse.
“He was worried about you. We all were.”
“Sorry to have kept you wondering for a bit,” he apologised sheepishly.
Riza shook her head with a quiet laugh. “You’re awake now. That’s all that matters.”
“And I’ll be out of here before you know it,” he nodded with determination. A confident smirk played on Al’s lips. He’d already accomplished the impossible with his brother, so Riza didn’t doubt that he would be.
That was all Riza wanted for him; to be happy, healthy, and living his life to the fullest.
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degenerate-yandere · 5 years ago
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Maybe something for yan Izuku's s/o pretending and humoring Izuku's delusions because she's scared of what will happen if she doesn't and hopes that if she plays along it'll build up good credit. Like acts like the perfect house wife, greets him when he gets home in hopes that she'll still be able to go outside to run errands outside.leans like a maniac to distract herself from how stressed and paranoid she os of him snapping. smiles, kisses, holds him, and hopes he stays happy and bubbly
Yet another great request that I was afraid to ruin. Hope you enjoy it anyway, Hun! 
A/N: This takes place after the main events of the story, when Izuku is the adult No.1 pro hero.
TW: Abuse, threats of violence, kidnapping, toxic relationships
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Deep breaths.
The taunting tick of the clock signaled the approach of that terrifying inevitability.
6:58 PM
You’d prepared dinner; two steaming plates sitting opposite each other across the table. It was a laborious task - not from the work of slaving over the stove, but the pure emotional toll of cooking for your captor. It was humiliating, an open submission to the domestic delusion he’d trained you to uphold. Just like now, as you waited by the locked door like a dog anticipating its masters return. He loved being greeted home with a peck on the cheek. It never failed to make his freckled face flush, uncaring that the act was performed with such rehearsed sterility. How hard it was to withhold the retch when your lips met his skin, or scream when he gently took your hand in his larger one as he guided you to the table.
7:00 PM
Any moment, he’d be back and you’d be forced to repeat that deranged routine - the one that ensured he remained nice and gentle. First hand experience had made you realize just how long a broken bone took to mend. Your leg still tensed with pain whenever you stood on it - a reminder of just how desperate you were to escape the psychotic hero. That was your first punishment. 
You hugged the frame of his bed, staring at the chain coiled around your ankle with eyes wide in complete terror. He just sat beside you, the mattress dipping from his weight. He smiled sweetly as you begged and pleaded; as a hundred confused questions flooded from your mouth like the tears seeping down your cheeks. He hummed in response - a despairingly unsatisfying answer to the suffocating situation you were in. Calloused fingers began tracing your leg as his emerald gaze devoured your petrified form. Violently, you curled inwards away from his sickening touch. He didn’t like that. Nor did he like your subsequent promises of escape. His mouth quirked into a slight frown, disappointment flashing in his eyes. To your utter dismay, his hand swiftly advanced to grasp your leg, forcibly yanking it outstretched. You winced in pain - tears intensifying as his gaze turned regretful; shifting into a silent apology. Oh god. Breath quickening to such a pace it felt as if your heart would spew from your mouth, his grip growing tighter and tighter and tighter. Words were held back by the insurmountable dread choking your throat.
“I’m so sorry, (y/n). I really don’t want to do this. It’s for your own good, promise.” You begged through frantic, painful jerks of your head. Placing his other hand on your knee only cemented the torturous anticipation. Izuku simply smiled and shrugged his shoulders. “I’m really, really sorry, honey. I just - I can’t let you get away with hurting me like that.” The irony was palpable, but your drowning fear silenced any retorts. “You’ll forgive me though, I know you will. You’ll see, (Y/n). Everything I do is for you.” Green sparks ran along his forearms. The sound was just as deafening as the pain was blinding.
Snap
The familiar sound of keys clicking into place demanded your attention. You breathed in and out slowly, a learned maneuver to be able to tolerate his crushing presence. A glimpse of greenery from the slither of open door was as tempting as it was fleeting. Hope was replaced with utter disgust as you met with his face. It was slick with a light sheen of sweat, bruises and dirt painting it with the usual consequences of hero work. He beamed so brightly when he saw you. It was blinding in its psychotic bliss.
“Hey, Honey! I’m so sorry I was late - got a bit held back at work. Y’know how it is.” He chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. His apologies meant nothing, you’d learned that much.
“Welcome home, Izuku.” Your pace was slow, a fragile string of words carefully repeated time and time again. You couldn’t afford to stutter. Izuku had to believe you wanted this as much as he did if you would ever be able to chance an escape. Make him believe this was real; that it was normal and reciprocated. The eager acceptance of his intrusive affections was what made him remove that damnable chain, he finally trusted you to wander the house. He didn’t bother to hide knives or makeshift weapons; almost taunting you with his power to overwhelm you. You leaned into him, lips slightly pursed as you thought of kissing anyone else but him. A finger met your mouth, causing your eyes to snap open with surprise. You didn’t rehearse for this.
“Hey, I was thinking, could you call me Deku, just for tonight?” his finger withdrew, opting for his gloved thumb to rub against your cheek. That’s when you saw it. That glint of lust in his eye. Izuku’s lips drew closer to yours, breath dusting against your face. “I’ve had a really long day. You could make it all better for me. You want that, right? To make me feel better?” Your heartbeat was deafening, thumping harshly against your rib cage. Without a second thought, your hands were pushing against his chest. A quizzical raise of his eyebrow sent numbing chills down your spine.
“I-I’ve made dinner, Izu - Deku.” His tongue darted to wet his lips as you spoke his hero name so adorably. You repressed a shriek as his hands snapped to your waist, pulling you flush against his body. His lips ghosted the shell of your ear.
“I’m hungry for something else tonight, (y/n).” Bile rose to your throat as his lips pressed fervently against yours. Pretend its anyone else - just pretend. You couldn’t take it much longer; you wrenched your head away, Izuku’s brows furrowing in response. “What’s wrong, babe?” He almost sounded authentically concerned, if not for the impatience that laced each word. You opted to look at his boots - it was far easier to compose yourself when you did.
“I-I cleaned the house today,” He let slip an infuriating ‘aw’, thumb tracing the bottom of your lip.
“That’s great, honey,” Izuku cooed.
“Maybe I should reward my good, little -”
“We’re out of food, I-I thought maybe when you’re working tomorrow I c-could go and get some more.” You were emboldened, electrified with newfound confidence. That soon proved fleeting, however, when he took a step back, fear filling its void as his eyes narrowed. His head shook as he scratched at his cheek.
“(Y/n)… that would mean-” Your hands trembled in front of you as you hesitantly placed them upon his chest, a plea for his trust.
“Leaving the house - I know,” Swallowing back your anxiety, your head arched to meet his concerned expression. “But you can trust me, ‘Zuku. I’ll come back, I-”
His hand crushed your wrist like a vice, your composure exploding into choking fear. “No!” He shouted. It was terrifyingly uncharacteristic.
Shots of pain accompanied the cracks from your wrist. “I-Izuku it hurts!”.
“Does it (y/n)!? Maybe it feels even a FRACTION of what I feel!” Hot tears slipped down his cheeks, as your pained ones did the same. With his free fingers, he rubbed his eyes harshly, wetting his fingers in the process. Those green eyes shot to you; furious and sorrowful. The muscles of his face moved erratically between the two extremes. When you tried to look away, his grip only tightened.
“Why… why is it so hard to just love me.” Izuku’s voice was riddled with hiccups and sobs, teeth clenched so hard that they threatened to crack. “What will it take, (y/n)? Why do you want to leave so badly? You hate me, don’t you?” Your head shook, fighting against the desire to tell him how right he was.
Izuku was completely crying now, no restraints upon those fragile emotions. His palm rubbed against his face as he grunted in pure frustration. It was when he grew silent, however, you became petrified. His eyes ensnared yours, solemn and terrifying. 
“It’s okay, (y/n). I can help you.” That voice, previously overflowing with provocation, was purposeful and strict. Against your pathetic resistance, he dragged you to the bedroom, shoving you upon the soft mattress. “You’ll learn to love me. I know you will. This is for you.” You could only cry as you knew what would inevitably ensue.
He cracked his knuckles.
“Everything I do is for you.”
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cottoncandyreaper · 3 years ago
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((More undertale story time that I did edit!))
"What are you doing down here? The underground has been vacant for a long time now...how did you, just show up?"
His hands were shaky as they ran over his face just for more questions to flutter into the line that was already forming in my mind. There was no way he could have just showed up out of thin air; was he in hiding? Was there someone that wanted to hurt him so he never showed up? Or was he an wanted criminal!? The possibilities were endless now and that made this even more of a scary predicament.
"I don't...remember much...I remember falling and pain...then blackness. My memories are not wanting to piece anything together just yet...I remember falling into the lab in dust and boxes. The scrap metal was not a comfortable landing pad...and then, you four showed up. You comprehend wingdings?"
I could only nod my answer for him choosing to start the healing magic once again working on his legs to hopefully give them the ability to carry some of his own weight when we start to moving.
"Well you figured out that Sans is my Dad, he made sure I learned Wingdings first. I didn't start learning English till I was three or four I think...so, ☠✋👍☜ ❄⚐ 💣☜☜❄ ✡⚐🕆 ☝☼✌☠👎🏱✌"
((Nice to meet you grandpa))
I didn't know what to truly think yet of this whole situation with his memories not helping us much in figuring out where he was for all the missing years. And then there was Daddy and Uncle Pap that weren't sure either about their own dad...it for sure wasn't adding up but I'd have to figure out where to start for sure later.
"You're so quick to help yet you barely know me. That isn't the safest mind set to have child."
"Oh don't worry about that...because I know right now I have more magic then you and can most definitely run faster too..."
"Just an observation, to think...I had a granddaughter and a human one at that."
As the glow subsided with the fading words spoken I stood with the help of Nicole and dusted off.
"We gotta get you out of here now and that's gonna be the tricky part. The walk hasn't been bad but you're still not one hundred percent and we can't rush in case something else is wrong that I can't heal."
"Speaking with the intelligence of a adult I see, another aspect of your father."
"Guys can you help me get him up?"
Nicole and Kloey were unsure of what to make of the situation just like I was but nodded a yes while Macie was reluctant.
"Can't you just use your magic to get him up and walking?"
"Sure if I had more practice and could focus like that but I can't. To move someone and not something you have to use their soul; Daddy can do it no problem but if I do it there's always a chance I could mess up and hurt them. So no, we're doing this the normal way so please, help."
I could tell she really wanted to argue me and really not want to be involved but Kloey was having none of it as she took her hand pulling her behind Grandpa while Nicole and I took a hand each grasping as tight as possible being careful of the holes. Would his hands break apart if we pulled from there?
"Okay; one, two, three!"
A pull here and a push there with some adjustments from behind as he stood to the same six foot statue of Uncle Pap he was officially standing and keeping balance even if I had to be the cane that assisted.
"How do you feel?"
"🕈☜✌😐📪 👌🕆❄ ✋💣 🕆🏱📬 ❄☟✌☠😐 ✡⚐🕆"
((Weak, but I'm up. Thank you))
"⚐✡🕆☼☜ 🕈☜☹👍⚐💣☜"
((You're welcome))
Looking over at the girls getting mixed signals from their features I readied myself for...well for Macie if she started complaining.
"Alright guys, back to the surface we go."
"You owe us a proper trip Font, remember that."
Macie wasn't a threat, she couldn't be but the ache of fear in my soul if the whole school found out about my magic, I wouldn't be able to handle that kind of chaos.
"Macie come on, we don't need to worry about that right now. Let's get out of here."
Kloey being the voice of reason as she grabbed her hand and started back leading the way now since I lingered in the back with my newly found Grandpa with Nicole as well for added support.
"Thanks Nicole."
"No problem."
The thought crossed my mind that I hoped Nicole would be one of my best friends throughout the school years, especially high school. She would make things alot more manageable havijg her around. Grandpa gave a small chuckle above as his hands grasped our shoulders tight securing himself more.
"Your soul explains your open mindness, green souls are open to all thanks to their kindness and willingness to learn."
"Green soul?"
Oops, one of the things I hadn't talked about yet; Kloey seemed to slow down as well to hear about the soul stuff that peaked her interest quickly.
"Human souls are different then monster souls since they take on the color of their owners dominate trait. Nicole's is kindness, Kloey's is patience so it's cyan and Macie's is...justice...which is, um, yellow."
"Why do you say mine like that?"
She stopped to stare me down, arms crossed and leaned to the side like the priss she was. Do I tell her the truth with it being that I was actually shocked since she only thought of herself most of the time or lie? The later seemed easier then the first yet Grandpa had other thoughts...I could tell he wasn't her biggest fan already just like me.
"Because it seems like you uphold justice just as little as you uphold friendship."
I didn't look up at him but the look on Macie as fear and unease began to float around her gave me a idea of what kind of look she was given by him. Turning on her heel quickly she walked without a word to us, Kloey lingered back and mumbling quietly.
"I know you two don't get along well Winny but...I promise, she isn't as bad as she appears. She can be, nice. She just has a hard time showing it."
I only shook my head tired of the conversation actually wanting the walk to be silent.
"✋ 💧☜☜ ☟🕆💣✌☠💧 ☟✌✞☜ ☠⚐❄ 👍☟✌☠☝☜👎 ✌💧 💣🕆👍☟ ✌💧 ✋ ☟✌👎 ☟⚐🏱☜👎 ❄☟☜✡ 🕈⚐🕆☹👎"
((I see humans have not changed as much as I hoped they would))
"❄☟☜☼☜ ✌☼☜ 💣⚐☼☜ ☠✋👍☜ ☟🕆💣✌☠💧 ❄☟☜☠ 👌✌👎📬 ✋ 👍✌☠ 🏱☼⚐💣✋💧☜ ✡⚐🕆 ❄☟✌❄"
((There are more nice humans then bad. I can promise you that))
Throughout the backtrack talking was minimal too none at all. Stopping was a frequent ordeal so Grandpa could catch his breath, I tried healing magic as much as I could but even that was starting to wipe me out.
"You'll be on the floor before me at this rate. I'll be fine, save your magic or you'll collapse."
Nicole gave a soft pat to my back.
"Want to trade spots for a bit?"
No was my response but Grandpa removed his hand deciding for me.
"Lead the group, we've been going so slow. I'm sure we'll reach the surface much quicker."
Nicole didn't even wait for me to respond or move out of the way taking my spot practically pushing me to the front. Macie didn't say a word as I did while only getting a small smile from Kloey. It seemed like a blur after that: elevator, the walk to and through the palace and then...the surface opening with bright blue sky and a beautiful view of the town below as the sun sat high in the sky shining its bright light down.
"Welcome to the surface Grandpa."
Looking over my shoulder at him where he stood frozen still with his hand lingering on Nicole's shoulder just gazing out at all before him; trees rushing around with the wind and birds chirping mixed with the distant sound of cars filling in the gaps from the town below.
"✋❄💧📬📬📬✌💣✌☪✋☠☝"
((Its...amazing))
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tiredcowpoke · 4 years ago
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TITLE: Should Have Seen It From the Start PAIRING: Arthur Morgan/Fem!Reader REQUEST: Anon requested an Arthur/fem!Reader where he tries to set her up with a “good man” in town and things don’t go as expected. BLURB: “Really, it was hard to hold his gaze as you spoke, dropping it away as you looked back off into the distance as you awaited his reaction. Though, you had to admit that the words had some weight to them, considering the light feeling that settled in your chest upon saying them.” WARNINGS: Some minor angst, mutual pining. Nothing too heavy. NOTE: I may not have set this up exactly to how the request was, as I don’t feel like Arthur’s the type to play matchmaker or force someone into a relationship, but I tried to keep a similar feeling behind the request. If that makes sense. Lmao Anyway, thank you for requesting and putting up with how slow I have been with these. This was also an uphill battle with writer’s block so I hope it doesn’t read too strongly of that.
This whole thing was just making you feel worse as the days went along, but this had come to a head.
Really, you felt like you should be enjoying the relatively peaceful stay in the area (at least, as peaceful as the gang could be) but this whole situation you found yourself in was souring the situation. It was hard to explain exactly how or why you decided to let it go to where it was. There had been a good amount of frustration, you had to admit, and...well, perhaps there was a touch of loneliness in there. How many times had you tried to clue him into how you were feeling? The number of times where it seemed like he had known but would then do something to toss that feeling out of the window? Seeing him with different people and wondering why it was never you?
You had argued with yourself several times about having to move on from it.
It was stupidly painful to deal with, and Daniel Lovette was probably one of the nicer men you had run into. If not the nicest, at least to you.
He was the son of the local fence, which gave you more than enough time to run into him when turning up with your (stolen) goods that wouldn’t do well in the general store. Considering the gang’s current plan of laying low, most of the money you did bring in was stolen jewelry and goods robbed from sleepy homesteads. The first few times, he had just given you a couple of nods and greetings when you would show up at his father’s still side business, which eventually led to a couple of conversations and...well, it seemed like he actually cared for your company these days. Returning to camp at that point was a different world. They were outlaws, you knew you would never quite fit in with the society that surrounded the gang. Still, it had been enough of a home for some time, but Arthur was always a bit of a source of frustration for you.
It had started slow, and you were somewhat used to him running a bit hot and cold. Sometimes it felt like you were as close as you knew the two of you were, then he would distance himself for some reason or another, before coming back around again. You got rather sick of the dance at points, but you hadn’t done much to put a stop to it. Hell, you had found yourself doing the same at points, almost as if you were following his lead.
During those points, you thought about maybe just saying something and getting it out in the open. That it could be dealt with instead of being this unspoken thing that you hoped would be mutual. You knew some of the women in camp had seen right through it and your dismissals. There had been some support in the beginning, but it wasn’t hard to see how they were growing frustrated with your refusal to address anything.
However, you knew you were scared. You knew Arthur enough to know he wouldn’t toss the admission back into your face, but...well, it could ruin things. The thoughts made you feel childish at points--you were both grown adults, you could handle talking truthfully. Yet, everything remained shut behind your teeth.
Yet, with all of that sitting on your conscious and Arthur switching back into his brand of cold shoulder (that it wasn’t one fully, you had noticed over time, but enough of one to get the message across) you had found yourself spending more time with Daniel.
However, it wasn’t hard to notice what he was looking for after a while. He wasn’t malicious or forceful about it, but there was a bit of hope in his eyes when you would give him more attention. At that point, you had started to wonder if it would be worth seeing where that went.
Which had felt like the beginning of the downward spiral of the situation.
Daniel knew who you were, what you did. He may not have been running his father’s business, but it wasn’t hard to figure out what with the fence seeing a number of people from different walks of life and he had been pretty intuitive in regards to what path you currently walked. The more you spent time with him, the more you thought about staying with him. He was understanding, too, having just gone through a rough courtship himself and it allowed you two to grow closer. Some of the gang members had seen the way you two interacted during the odd points where you were in town with someone (Daniel giving some subtly, thankfully.)
You should have expected word to get back to camp in some way, but people developing relationships out of it had happened in the past. Arthur was a prime example.
So it was damn confusing when Daniel had approached you one day at the fence, his tone curious yet his expression seemed somewhat troubled.
“This is gonna seem like an odd question, but do you got a brother or something?”
“Brother? No…”
“Well, I had been thinking along those lines because I just got cornered by someone who said he was lookin’ out for you.”
You had straightened up at that point. “What did he look like?”
“Ah, I dunno...taller than me somewhat, tan leather jacket, black hat.”
That had caused your stomach to clench, hands balling into fists. Oh, you had a good idea of who Daniel was talking about, you just didn’t want to believe it. Was that supposed to be some sweet gesture on Arthur’s part? All it did was make your blood boil somewhat.
“Don’t worry about him,” you had said after a moment, “I’ll deal with him.”
It was easier said than done, considering how Arthur had seemed to go right on the defensive about it. There had been some arguing back and forth about what you thought you were doing. (You really wished you had a solid answer to that at the time, but you had brushed it off easily enough.) How Arthur didn’t fully trust the guy, that you were putting the gang at risk by getting involved with someone outside of it. That it would cost them the peace they had found at the moment.
The last comment had made you scoff, your mouth somewhat parted in disbelieve.
“Oh, you’ve had no issue doing so yourself!” you had snapped, “I didn’t get involved once in your relationships but suddenly it’s fine when it’s mine? I am just supposed to watch you do the same and just stay miserable?”
The last question had been a bit of a slip up on your part, but it had been enough to keep Arthur from retorting as a somewhat confused look crossed his face. However, you had just pressed your lips into a thin line before turning and walking back off into camp. You had been expecting him to call after you with how quick he had been to jump into an argument when Daniel had been mentioned, but he had stayed away from you that evening and, for once, you hadn’t minded.
Things had seemed to subside after that, Arthur almost stepping right out of your business and getting caught up in the gang’s. It was a bit of a relief, honestly, giving you some time to figure this thing out. Yet, things didn’t quite seem to feel like they fit. Daniel was a sweet man, but something was keeping you back. It felt like it was gnawing at the back of your mind, leaving you taking steps back for each Daniel tried to take forward. It wasn’t hard to see where he wanted things to go, and...well, you had stuck up for the idea of that, hadn’t you?
Really, the more you thought about it, the more you realized it was the hypocrisy of it all that had you more angry than some attempt to block an opportunity.
The whole situation twisted and sat heavily in your gut as guilt made its way to the forefront of your mind.
You had to admit to yourself, and more importantly Daniel, that there wasn’t there. If it were the feelings you had for Arthur that lingered just out of reach with how far you had shoved them down, or if Daniel just wasn’t the right person, you weren’t sure.
However, it wasn’t right.
The memory of you telling him so still sat heavily on your mind as you sat on the top of your horse, riding rather slowly back toward camp as you could feel a tightness in your throat and in your chest. Daniel had taken it well for the most part, and you knew it could have gone worse if you had forced anything on your part, yet something he had said was lingering on your mind.
“If it’s because of that gang of yours, and I don’t know if it’ll make any difference, but that guy that threatened me before had come back to apologize about it and...guess he wished us luck? I mean, he looked conflicted about it, but I kind of expected that given the aggression before, but…”
You had been quick to assure him that it wasn’t because you were worried about what others thought, but rather something you weren’t feeling. Yet, his words kept circling in a way Daniel likely didn’t intend. Really, it felt like you were suffocating with the heat of the area and the way your mind seemed to be turning things over. A part of you felt like you were shooting yourself in the foot with a chance to get over this thing with Arthur, yet a more certain and louder part silenced that with the fact that you didn’t feel anything really there. You knew he would make someone very happy one day, but that person wasn’t going to be you.
Now it was just the strange feeling that had cropped up at what Arthur had supposedly told him.
Really, you just...needed to tell him.
Even if it went nowhere or you had been reading this whole thing wrong, it would at least allow you to close the book instead of leaving it open to glance back at whenever you thought about courting someone.
The day was starting to bleed into late afternoon by the time you had arrived back at camp, your mind a jumbled mess but you were certain of the goal you had in mind. You hitched your horse and glanced around the area, the camp lively with the usual amount of activity for that time of day. However, you noticed Arthur was, thankfully, writing in his journal under the canvas of his wagon. The sight of it put a nervous twist to your gut, causing you to pause somewhat in your approach.
Damn it, c’mon, a voice in the back of your mind hissed. It had you continuing to move as you decided to shove the feeling down for now.
Arthur glanced up at your approach, resting his pencil against the page as you came to a stop just under the canvas.
“We need to talk,” you stated, the words pulling a somewhat tense expression from him as he shut his journal.
“‘Bout what?” he asked as you crossed your arms, glancing down toward the ground.
“Some things I have been thinking about, I guess,” you replied, glancing back up at him, “About Daniel and...you.”
“Me? What’s that got to do with me?”
“It’s...it’s not something I want to talk about here. Come for a walk with me, will you?”
“Guess I got no choice…” Arthur muttered as he tucked his journal into his satchel, rising from his cot as you turned to walk toward the edge of camp.
The area was dry and hot, camp settling in a place that at least offered some form of shade from the trees but it wasn’t too much. So, you had wandered far enough out until you found a rock near a tree, far enough away from prying eyes and the heat wouldn’t stifle you any further. Really, you just wanted to spit it out but...well, you wanted to handle it better. Get some read on the situation from him before you took any sort of leap.
“You gonna tell me what’s gotten into you?” Arthur asked once you had stopped walking, causing you to raise an eyebrow toward him.
“Me? I’m not the one watching after your relationships.”
“...That man can’t keep a damn conversation to himself, can he?”
“Not when it’s about me, apparently.”
He shifted a little closer to you, stepping under the shade of the tree as you looked out at the area around you both.
“How’s that goin’, anyway?”
You let out a small scoff at the question, but the touch of amusement didn’t stay as you glanced over at him before shrugging.
“It’s not going anywhere,” you replied, leaning back against the tree truck as you crossed your arms, “He fancies me, but...guess I’m not all that interested in him. Where romance is concerned, at least.”
“So all them dramatics, they were for nothin’?”
“No, it got you to wise up,” you returned, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye, “I had also been hoping that something would come out of it so I could...well.”
“I still ain’t so sure how this involves me,” Arthur said as you let out a steadying sigh.
“Why’d you bother?” you asked, “Getting involved like you did. I know you said you didn’t trust the guy, but have you been doing what you did for the other people in camp?”
“I saw you two in town once,” he replied, letting out a sigh, “Guess I just...didn’t like the look of him, wanted to see what he was ‘bout.”
“He’s a good guy,” you assured, “Just...too good for me, I suppose.”
“That ain’t true, you’re one of the better ones out of us here,” Arthur stated, causing your heart to thump hard in your chest as you pressed your lips together before letting out a small chuckle.
“No offense, but that’s in comparison to the company I keep.”
“Sure, but...I dunno.”
“I told him I couldn’t do what he was hoping from me,” you replied, shifting as you glanced toward him, “Would’ve been nice, but...I think I’m still caught up in something.”
“Caught up?”
“Arthur…” you started, letting out another breath. It was now or never. “When it comes to things like that, I feel like I’m running into a wall because...I have feelings for you. I have for a...long time.”
Really, it was hard to hold his gaze as you spoke, dropping it away as you looked back off into the distance as you awaited his reaction. Though, you had to admit that the words had some weight to them, considering the light feeling that settled in your chest upon saying them.
You had been frustrated about carrying it around for so long, the feelings, the thoughts, even the odd dream. A part of you weren’t sure how long ago they had started, perhaps when you were younger even, but...well, things were complicated. You had legitimately thought it wouldn’t happen at points for reasons outside of the courage to admit to it.
“Me?” he asked after a moment, causing you to finally look back at him, “You’re tellin’ me this Daniel’s too good for you, but I’m sayin’ you’re too good for the likes of me.”
“Well, I can return your argument against my own thoughts about that,” you said, “If you’re going to try to talk me out of these feelings I’ve been carrying for years over just telling me you don’t return them, I wish you would do that instead.”
There was another pause as you let your response linger between the two of you, your heart hammering away in your chest now as you just hoped he would give you some sort of answer. At that point, you didn’t care what it was outside of it being some sort of answer to an unsaid question that had been sitting for quite some time.
Do you feel anything for me?
“I ain’t a jealous man, but...part of me was scared at the idea of you leavin’. I knew that much, but the idea that it was for someone who...well, I can’t lie and say I ain’t had somethin’ for you for a while too, but...I always thought you could do better than me. You can do better than me.”
“You could let me decide that for myself…” you returned, shifting so that you weren’t leaning against the tree, standing before him with that damn fluttering in your chest and stomach.
Arthur didn’t say anything in return, meeting your gaze with more intensity than he had been giving you throughout the conversation. There was a part of you that feared you might be reading the situation wrong, that taking a step toward him was the wrong move, but with the pause and the flicker of his gaze about your face, you found yourself chancing it. You reached a hand up and cupped his cheek, feeling the light prickle of his stubble that was growing out somewhat these days, Arthur accepting the touch after a moment.
You leaned up and pressed your mouth against his in a light kiss, ready to pull back if things didn’t seem right, but you felt his arms wrapping around your back. He pressed you against him as you pressed a more firm kiss against his lips, slipping your hands up into his hair and around his neck, Arthur pressing back into the kiss as you did so. Your mind seemed to relax for a few moments, taking in the feeling of his lips against yours and his hold.
Though, eventually, you found yourself pulling back somewhat as the need for air seemed to press into the forefront of your mind. However, Arthur didn’t release his hold, and you didn’t back all that far away from him as you pressed your forehead against his own.
“I’ve been wanting to do that for...longer than I care to admit,” you muttered, letting out a soft chuckle as you saw a small grin pull at Arthur’s lips.
“...Me, too,” he returned, your gaze meeting his own in the closed-in space between you, “I’m sorry I’ve been actin’ a fool, I just…”
“You’re not the only one,” you replied, shifting your hands down to rest on his shoulders, “I should have been more honest with you and myself.”
Arthur let out a small sound in the back of his throat, not much in agreement but you didn’t pick up much disagreement from it. However, you didn’t read too much into it, not knowing where his head was at most of the time, but you were glad you got to know this.
Looking into his eyes, and knowing very well it would be a fun time to address this with camp after everything, you couldn’t find yourself regretting the choice to finally say the words.
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saladejin · 5 years ago
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Call An Uber? | 04
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BTS x Reader | idolverse au, uber driver!Reader, translator!Reader |  Fluff, flirting, super slow burn, angst and hurt/comfort, mature themes and eventual smut
Summary:  Your normal life with a normal, yet inconsistent job gets drastically changed when your dreams come true. Sounds boring right?
What happens when all of this occurs, but you’re still doing something you love AND getting a large sum for it? Now there’s something to think about, and it’s definitely not what you’re thinking.
Warnings: Implied mental health struggles, anxiety and slight panic attack
Word Count: 2.9k 
< masterpost >
  »»————- <<prev | next >> ————-««
  Another three days passing brought forth another fresh steaming pile of emotions. 
I was due to start my job at Bighit in the following week, and had been dropping in to meet with Bang PD and the staff regularly since the initial signing of the documents. Its only purpose was just for me to get to know everyone, since I would start off in the company playing a major role, and for me to get comfortable in the environment. PD-nim knew I was not used to working for such large and renowned companies, and I was so happy he had taken that into consideration.
Another meet-and-greet done today, and I was trembling. 
I didn’t know why it had all suddenly decided to drop on me now, but my only solace was the splash of vivid crimson sitting out in the otherwise monochrome carpark of the building. I yanked open the car door with shaking fingers and all but fell into the familiar leather seat, my breathing uneven from the tightening within my chest.
Don’t get me wrong at all, the company was absolutely amazing, and so were all the staff and their immediate hospitality. Bang PD was like a second father to me already, and I’d even had him ruffle my hair once today after he’d somehow managed to laugh at one of my jokes. His assistant, which I now knew as Chang Soojin, or just Soojin-unni as she had told me to use, was becoming a reliable colleague and friend pretty quickly too. I had met many members of the staff, including the co-ordi noonas, managers, stylists etc. Even a group of interpreters who specialised in specific languages.
Hence why they employed me so quickly, I’d thought to myself after finding out they only knew English and Korean.
There was that one Spanish interpreter, who had been absent on the ‘fateful day’, but he was now doing fine and had profusely apologised to me afterwards. I felt bad for the guy, as I probably seemed like a warning replacement if anything of disarray was to happen again.
Bighit can be bloody scary, damn.
My breathing had evened slightly, but stress was still causing my head to become a mess of jagged scribbles. So much had changed in my life recently, and even if it had an overall positive effect, my mind was still left reeling. This was the kind of sudden responsibility that made me want to revisit my childhood days, to let go of being an adult and to be surrounded by nothing but carefree bliss.
A light rapping on my car passenger window tore me from my strangling thoughts. I gasped, squinting my eyes to glimpse at the darkly clothed figure before sighing. The person had thoroughly frightened me, and I wasn’t very happy about it. They crouched down to look in, and when they saw I was making no move to stop them, they pulled open the passenger door hesitantly.
“Is this Uber operating?” Yoongi softly asked.
I was still irritated that my precious alone-time had been ruined, after going through quite a bit of anxiety about my life in general, but I couldn’t bring myself to refuse the impassive man at the moment. After even more thought, I concluded that having someone to talk to would in fact help me the most right now. When I nodded slowly, sighing again in an attempt to regather myself, he lowered his head in gentle understanding.
“Uh, if it’s a really bad time I-”
“No, Yoongi. Wait is it even okay to not use honorifics? Should I call you oppa?” I shook my head, my voice steadily gaining life again from how croaky it sounded before. I hadn’t cried, but I was definitely on the verge before he’d made his appearance.
Yoongi settled into the passenger seat holding a lidded coffee cup. He was dressed in dark but flowy clothing, and I questioned his sanity briefly considering how hot it was outside. It was mid-afternoon at the moment, but we both didn’t seem to have schedules planned.
“Even though I’m not against it, I feel like dropping the honorifics would work better for you. I won’t get offended,” he hummed, sipping his coffee. I noticed how tired his eyes were under the cap he wore, and instantly felt bad for being annoyed with him before. He adorned a black mask too, but it was sitting under his chin to make talking and drinking easier.
“Did you also want coffee? I could offer to get you one.”
His sudden question caused me to blink in confusion. Then I realised I had been eyeing the cup in his pale hands quite intensely. His dark eyes were blank and his pale blue-white hair was slightly roughened from the breeze outside. Trying not to fawn over him, I broke out into a strained chuckle while my hands came up to slap my cheeks in embarrassment.
“No no no, I wasn’t…Ah I’m sorry, I just have a lot going on at the moment.” I decided to let the cat out of the bag with another sigh. He may as well know what was going on behind my outwardly apparent emotions. I didn’t even know how I was meant to hold a decent conversation when my insides were such a nervous wreck. I knew I would build myself up again eventually, but he just happened to catch me at a vulnerable time.
“Yeah, I could tell,” he started. “I followed you out because I saw you running out here shaking like a leaf. I guess it sounds kind of creepy when put like that.” He shrugged, eyeing the dashboard of my car while I just tried to take in his quiet observation.
“No, actually I appreciate it. You haven’t even met me yet…ugh why am I doing everything backwards right now?” I rested my head onto the steering wheel, positively exasperated. Yoongi and I had never even held a conversation before, but here I was acting like a total idiot and making him worry about my mental health.
“Don’t worry about it, you’re all I hear about these days.” He sighs with a groan, letting his head roll back to rest against the leather headrest. My own curiosity was tickled.
“Really? Let me guess, ‘the crazy Uber chick who somehow managed to get herself involved with shit that didn’t concern her’?”
He laughed silently at that, the gummy smile melting my bundling insides into a puddle – and suddenly everything was alright.
I didn’t have to have everything in my life figured out right now, I just had to make the most of my time with these amazingly driven individuals who had undoubtedly captured my heart. Alongside this job which was actually my passion to begin with.
I didn’t even know how I hadn’t freaked out over the fact that the Min Yoongi, worldwide famous producer and rapper, was sitting in my car. He was sitting in the same seat the Park Jimin had sat in about a week and a half ago. I needed to shut down my brain before it began to burn a hole into the back of my skull from overworking.
“That would be funny, but no, definitely not. I just wish the young ones would let me sleep, but they’ve been excited. I swear I’ve already met you ten times at this point.”
I snort in amusement, absolutely loving how blunt he was about the whole situation. Too many people, since I had arrived in the country, were overbearingly polite and careful with their words. I was not used to it at all, and it made the ‘foreign’ experience all the more jarring. Yoongi probably understood this to an extent, so I was grateful he tried his best to be more casual right away.
“Look, can I start driving? I just need to clear my head a bit. Maybe I can introduce myself properly.” I exhaled loudly, my nerves significantly calmed since chatting a little. Even though I felt terrible at the thought, I couldn’t help but be grateful that it was Yoongi who had paid me a surprise visit instead of one of the others. His presence was somewhat reserved and I had trouble reading the guy half the time, but his company was the type I needed instead of something loud and overwhelming.
“Sure, I did kind of barge in so you can continue with whatever you were doing.”
You mean almost having a mental breakdown?
“But I do want to actually meet you, because if I have to hear your name around the dorm one more fucking time without knowing who you are, I may just snap.”
I laughed loudly, his grunt-worthy words causing amusement to roil around in my chest. I figured I would question him about exactly what was said a bit later. For now, I just needed to relax and ease my worries, and driving was my channel for exactly that. I started reversing out of the carpark with silence finally befalling the car, grateful to finally leave behind the line of black company vans surrounding me. I found it ominous if I was completely honest. Engulfed by the view of several identical black vans was a little unsettling when the only car I was used to was Red.
When did I even decide to name my car? It’s such a boring name too.
“Well, I can start by saying my name is (L/n) (Y/n). (Y/n) is fine, and you already known I don’t care for honorifics. I’m from (Y/c), and I landed a job at Bighit Entertainment by letting two of your band members hitch a ride. Ultimately escaping their foreseeable deaths.” My dramatic tone increased the longer I spoke, and I could see the corners of Yoongi’s lips turning up gradually.
“That sounds about right. Jiminie told me you were a big fan, but it turns out you are really collected when you see us. I appreciate your efforts, but feel free to let it out if you need.” He tilted his head with a smirk, his ‘Genius Suga’ persona surfacing within the span of two whole seconds. I just bit my lip to contain another amused giggle.
“Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but I’m not one to freak out after the initial shock. Most of my extra-ness is of the internal type, I’m afraid.”
He shook his head in mock disappointment, eventually flashing me that endearing expression where his lips stretched across his whole face. I covered my cheeks with one hand to stop my bubbling amusement from erupting.
“Stop please, or I’ll crash!”
He simply sipped his coffee, smirking again at my reaction. I knew I hadn’t actually doused his ego, but his antics still aided in lifting my spirits higher and higher. As I tried to figure out where I wanted to drive, Yoongi pulled out a small notepad full of scrawled notes and scribbled out lines.
“Well, you already know who I am, that much I can guess. Now that we’ve met, I can tell those kids to shut up and do something useful,” he continued. Even though his tone was full of complaint, I knew he loved every single one of those boys wholeheartedly.
“Where are they now?” I asked through a smile, glancing down as the rapper flicked through his notepad to the page he had last used. “Practicing more, at least I know Jiminie, Jin-hyung and Jungkook-ah are. We’ve got a big concert and a comeback soon, so everyone is riled up.”
“Yeah, that seems like a packed schedule for at least a few months. I’m really excited for what you guys have in store though, it seems too unreal that I actually get to see everything behind the scenes for the first time in my life,” I sighed out in awe, thinking about a possible new album and new content. How could I even go about it normally when everything was different? Wait, was I going to get a discounted album? I surely hoped so.
Yoongi looked at me carefully before making a few notes in his notepad, his fingers working the pen deftly through long and hardened experience. His ripped black jeans were tighter than I initially thought they were, but my attention only went there because he was tapping his foot rhythmically as he wrote.
“Lyrics?” I questioned, raising an eyebrow in his direction and diverting my attention. I drove towards the outskirts of Seoul, hoping to find somewhere quiet and peaceful to settle for a bit. The time had essentially flown by, but I was sure the sky wouldn’t darken just yet.
“Yeah, just the usual. I help write a lot of songs, and lyrics always just flood into my brain at the most random times, you know?” he murmured, flicking backwards to another page and filling in another empty space.
The realisation that I was driving somewhere random and unknown hit me suddenly, and I briefly wondered if taking Yoongi with me would end up costing me my job all too soon. I was quickly reminded of a similar occurrence with two maknaes, one that caused the managers and Namjoon to lose their absolute marbles.
“Um, I was gonna drive randomly around the area, but I just realised that your managers would skin me alive if they knew I took you with me. Does anyone know you’re with me?”
Yoongi looked up, his eyes, which were once laser-focused on his lyrics, now scoured into my own and I gulped suddenly. His long, dark eyelashes were always beautiful, but they were even more mesmerising in person and this close. They contrasted so nicely against his milky skin that I almost lost focus on the road again.
I may just crash and kill someone one of these days. Customer or not.
“I texted a few people,” was all he said before returning to his notepad, and I shrugged indifferently. He was an adult, and he could make his own decisions. I just hoped I didn’t cop any roastings for it later on.
“Would I be able to show you something?” he then asked.
I glanced sideways, catching him picking at his nails with his teeth apprehensively. It seemed he was stuck on something to do with a lyric, but I didn’t know how I could possibly lend a hand. His lyrics were always so impactful and flowed so nicely. How could I form my own opinion when everything I’d heard from him so far was nothing less than beautiful?
“Yeah? Did you need another perspective?” I probed, willing my feelings of disbelief down into the depths of my subconscious.
“Well, I’m trying to tie together my verse in one of the new songs, and I almost have it. I want someone fresh to have a look.” He held out the pad and I pulled over onto the side of the smaller road. We were now definitely nearing the more ‘picturesque’ side of Seoul anyway, and the city fell away behind us as my eyes scanned over Yoongi’s handwriting. The last line struck a chord deeply within me.
“This is real you, and this is real me” – which one is “you”? Which one is “me”?
“Wow, this really hits hard,” I breathe, reading over the snippets of the verse he had written again to fully absorb what was going on. The whole thing was emotional, and raw. I could imagine his voice rapping hard to form these thoughts, the angry and hurt emotions seeping in.
“I can feel the struggle through the lyrics. It’s like you’ve been through a false love that you threw yourself into after believing it was true...a betrayal of sorts, I guess?” I met his eyes again and grew a little confused when a chuckle of irony fell from him. It must have been some joke I didn’t understand.
“I’m glad you feel so much from it.” He blinked. “I’m actually going to try a different technique with this track, so expect some changes from my usual style.”
He then smiled again, taking the notepad before I could catch any glimpses of the other notes. I couldn’t contain a soft huff of annoyance. “You’re not just gonna tell me?”
He deadpanned before parting his lips to respond. “Just because you work for Bighit doesn’t mean you get every special privilege.” I almost reeled at the thought of bothering him with my question, but he only smiled again while tucking his notepad away.
“Plus, you’re a fan, so my goal is to keep it a secret for as long as possible.”
“Mean,” I grunted, pulling out onto the road again so I could start to head home. The sky was darkening, and I knew there were only so many boundaries I could push before I crossed the line. Yoongi seemed to know this too, but he avoided addressing the subject for some reason.
“Where do you want to be dropped? I’ll have you know I’ve been charging you handsomely for this Uber service,” I muttered, still pretending to be pissed off at him for hiding information.
“I’ll buy you a coffee next time, I promise.”
          Copyright © 2020 by salade. All rights reserved
tagged: @l4life​, @joyful-jimin​
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