#and when I left he didn't say anything to me he's giving me Luke warm shoulder

[sensitivegoblin]

Ramble/update/vent

[wonuwrites]

Seventeen's Reaction When You Can't Sleep At Night.

Anyone else having a rough time sleeping lately or is it just me? Past few nights have been rough so I thought of this little thing. Also was inspired to write this based off the song "When You Can't Sleep At Night" by Of Mice And Men. Hope y'all enjoy it.

Warning: mentions death of a loved one, anxiety, nightmares, fluff/angst in some places, minor cussing, fairly sfw but Dino's is a bit suggestive so MDNI, oh also some pet names like: Sweetheart, Baby. Love, Babe, idk the cute names and shit lmfao.

☾ S. Coups:

Your mind was racing and you couldn't help but stare up at the ceiling. You felt a bit guilty because you kept tossing and turning when you were attempting to fall asleep. Seungcheol who was next to you didn't say anything but you made him turn slightly as well while keeping his arm loosely around your waist. He was sound asleep and truth be told you envied him. You wish you could sleep like him. As if he could hear your envious thoughts, you felt his lips on your shoulder before he pulled you closer to him. "Still awake, sweetheart?" You nodded before turning over to look at him. He kissed you and pulled you closer to him. He'd ask you what was on your mind and would do everything in his power to help you sleep. He wouldn't even close his eyes until he knew you were asleep for sure.

☾ Jeonghan:

You made your way into the kitchen to get a cup of water. You were almost 80% convinced that sleep was not going to happen that night because a random bout of anxiety was just eating you alive. What was the anxiety? You had no fucking clue but it just kept nagging at you and you hated it. You just felt so small and you couldn't find your center. You remember a luke warm glass of water used to help one of your friends back in high school so you decided to try it. You only took a sip before tears threatened to fall which made you take a shaky breath. You leaned against the kitchen counter and tried your best not to breakdown but that didn't work to well. Soon you just let it out. You didn't know how long you were there but you felt someone come up behind you and pull you into his embrace. Jeonghan noticed you were taking awhile to come back to bed and decided to look for you. When he found you crying in the kitchen he felt his heart break into a million pieces. He wanted to give you space at first but also felt that you needed someone at that time so he just came and hugged you. You started to cry into his chest harder which he just rocked you until you were done and ready to talk about it. Sleep could wait.

☾ Joshua:

The first few nights after Jisoo left for tour or various schedules were the worst. You had become completely reliant on him and needed to feel his side of the bed had something in it. You had done everything to make it seem that way with adding weighted blankets, books, or even a pet. Nothing worked long term and tonight you felt it. You thought maybe you could gaslight yourself and get some rest that way but no. Nothing was working. Your eyes were tired but the rest of you was not. You decided to scroll on social media and watch fancams of him and hope that would help and it almost did until Jisoo decided to shoot you a text to let you know that he had just got to his hotel. Instinctively, you called him which made him nervous and confused. It was nearly 2:30 am in where you were and you were awake? Before he could even scold you in concern you told him you couldn't sleep. His heart would hurt a bit because he knew that you struggled sleeping when he was not there. He just stayed on the phone with you until you fell asleep. Even then he stayed on a little longer just to hear your breathing. "I'll be home soon, (Y/N,)" he would whisper, "I love you, always."

☾ Jun:

You had a huge project coming up at work in the next week and you were struggling to sleep. Jun didn't realize how bad it was until he stayed the night and noticed you were no longer snuggled into his side. He walked around the house while rubbing his eye trying to find you but it was as if you vanished. He almost gave up until he found a light under a closet door and he found it weird. He knocked on the door while whispering your name which made you gasp in shock. Before you could hide the evidence of papers everywhere Jun opened the closet door and looked at you with an emotionless face. You looked down embarrassed which made him sit down on the floor across from you. He would slowly gather the paperwork, and when you tried to protest he would just shake his head. "Baby," he would whisper, "tomorrow is your day off, how about we practice your project tomorrow after a good night rest?" You tried to protest again but he just looked at you with a pleading look. You would then feel guilty before nodding and looking down. This hurt Jun's heart because he didn't want to be a controlling person but truth be told he was worried for you. He leaned over and kissed both your left and right cheeks before helping both of you up. He led you back into the bedroom while whispering sweet nothings to you. Once you got into bed, he left the room to "hide" your project before joining you.

☾ Hoshi:

You shot up in bed screaming after having the most realistic nightmare. This nightmare has haunted you for years but you thought it was over. Especially with you now dating Soonyoung. Soonyoung jolted up as well asking what was wrong while wrapping his arms around you. You starting weeping into his chest which made him scared as hell. He hugged you as you kept saying "no" and tried his best to calm you down. His eyes started water as he realized soon that you were mumbling apologies to your ex who had passed away in the past. He never asked any information about his death but he knew that it hurt you a lot. He knew the best thing he could do was rock you and kiss the top of your head until you calmed down. Once you did, he held you like that until you started to cry again and apologizing to him. You didn't want Soonyoung to think you loved your ex more because it wasn't the truth. He whispered that you didn't need to apologize and reminded you that he was there for the good, the bad, and the ugly. "Baby, you don't have to tell me a thing if it's too much, but I'm here to listen if you are ever ready. I want to help. I love you, okay?" "okay."

☾ Wonwoo:

Your best friend recently passed from a freak accident and it was just eating you alive. Why did they have to go? Why so soon? You didn't even get to say a proper goodbye and that's what killed you. You just missed them so much and your heart hurt from it. Work had be generous and gave you a bereavement period but staying alone in your thoughts somehow made this time worse for you. You didn't admit it to anyone but Wonwoo knew you were struggling really bad. He saw the signs and knew you weren't sleeping well. Which is why Wonwoo was staying over the night of the funeral so he could do everything in his power to help you. Not with words but with actions. He made you tea and put soft music while you sat on the couch in a blanket while scrolling through your friends instagram. His heart hurt for you because he knew what it was like to lose someone. He sat next to you and put an arm around you. You leaned up against him, "I miss them," you whispered. "I know, I'm sorry." He continued to hold you until finally went to sleep.

☾ Woozi:

After a hour of tossing and turning, you realized that sleep was just not an option. You didn't know why it was so hard to sleep but it just was. You sighed as you turned on your phone and noticed Jihoon had just sent you an instagram reel. You couldn't help but smile at his name and watched the reel with a smile across your face. When you reacted to the reel you got a call pretty soon from him which you quickly answered. "You're still up?" He asked before you could even say 'hello.' This made you scoff before saying, "I could say the same thing about you." "Eh, I have an excuse. I'm in the studio." You rolled your eyes before getting an idea. "Can I come by? I can't sleep and wanna be near you. I promise I won't annoy you." He chuckled and hummed a bit. "Sure, wanna spend the night too when we are both finally sleepy?" "Yes please. I'll be there in 10."

☾ DK:

One of your many quirks was panic baking. Whenever you were stressed about something you would bake. It didn't matter if it was brownies, cakes, bread, cupcakes, lemon bars, or whatever. So many of your friends loved this little habit about you but they didn't realize you would do this instead of sleep most nights. However, Seokmin did. He came home after a long day of schedules when he smelt some goodies come from the kitchen. Normally people would be excited to smell goodies but not at 1:30 in the morning. He would sigh and make his way to the kitchen. There he saw you taking out some cupcakes. He waited for you to set the hot plate down before he called out your name. You jumped and looked at him as if you were a deer in headlights. He gave you a concerned look and that's when you broke down and told him you couldn't sleep because you were nervous so you baked because that "was all you were good at." As you continued to breakdown in front of Seokmin, he quickly made his way to you and just rocked you while you fell apart. He whispered sweet nothings and stayed there for awhile before promising to clean up the kitchen so you could take a shower in hopes it would make you sleepy.

☾ Mingyu:

It was one of those nights where sleep was the enemy. You just kept tossing and turning to a point where you were just getting annoyed. You had tried everything from white noise to brewing some sleepy time tea. Nothing worked. It wasn't until you started scrolling through instagram and noticed Mingyu just posted a photodump. You liked it instinctively and automatically got a call from your concerned boyfriend. It was 2am and his royalty was still awake? Unacceptable. When you answered his heart broke when he realized that you were struggling to sleep so he did what any good boyfriend would do and came over to snuggle. Hopefully he could help you sleep.

☾ Minghao:

It was a sleepless night the night before and you promised Minghao to a brunch date. You were exhausted by the time you got there but tried your best to shake it off so he wouldn't worry. However, Minghao knew how to read you like a book so you were not able to fool him one bit. He would just order the food to go and take your cute ass home so you could get some proper rest. He would wait for you to tell him if anything was going on but would just take care of you by brewing you a tea or cuddling you to sleep.

☾ Seungkwan:

Sleeping was never one of your talents. Honestly, you never could get the right amount of sleep. It would either be too much or too little. To say this didn't concern Seungkwan would be a lie. He would often ask how your sleep schedule was and if you mentioned you got less than 3 hours the night before his heart would break. Unlike Minghao, he would ask if anything was bothering you or what was going on but that's just because he wanted to make sure you were okay. If you were going through something, he would try his best to work it out with you. He even would offer a shoulder to sleep on if you got sleepy throughout the day.

☾ Vernon:

To say you tried to sleep was an understatement. You were tossing and turning, counting all the sheep, and even tried to gaslight yourself that you were asleep. However, nothing worked. You still laid wide awake while your precious boyfriend was asleep peaceful next to you. You sighed as you turned one last time and surprisingly that woke Hansol up. He rubbed his eye before flinging an arm around you and pulling you closer. "You okay, babe?" He would ask with his voice all gruffy sounding due to the sleep. "yeah... sorry." He didn't believe you and would roll you over so you were making eye contact, he tried to figure it out telepathically but he couldn't so he kissed your nose instead. The gesture made you scoff before snuggling into him. "I'm fine, just can't sleep very well tonight." He'd hum while playing mindlessly with your hair. "We can put on a movie if you want?" You would smile into his chest before whispering an "ok." It was moments like these when you were thankful he was there.

☾ Dino:

You sighed before sat up to get out of bed. Sleep was just not in the cards and honestly there were other things you could do instead of getting a restless night of sleep. However, you momentarily forgot your adorable boyfriend, Chan, was cuddled up next to you and his grasp tightened as you tried to escape his grasp. Him being stubborn made you giggle which made him smile before he looked up at you. "You can't leave me yet, it's still dark outside." You would sigh before wrapping your arms around him as well in defeat. "Sorry babe, I just can't sleep." "Mmm, why?" "I don't know. I've tried everything." He then opened his eyes a bit and gave you a little smirk, "I mean not everything...." You could feel what he meant and giggled before kissing him and hoping he could *literally* wear you out.

It's finally out. Please lmk your favorite one. Personally I loved writing DK's part. (as usual. It's so easy for me to write for him,) Please lmk what yall liked tho <3

[holdmytesseract]

Hi love i wanted to request a drabble/blurb with tom hiddleston where he is getting ready with his pregnant wife for an event and she says something like i look like a whale or huge.....

Some reassurance, comfort and implied smut!!!!!!!

Nothing Less Than A Goddess

Tom Hiddleston x pregnant!Reader

Warnings: pregnancy stuff, insecurities, fluff, tiny bit suggestive smut

Word Count: blurb

a/n: Thank you for that sweet request, nonny! I hope you like what I came up with! 🤗

P.S. This gif is how I imagined him to look in that oneshot. 👀

You stood in the bedroom in your underwear, after just having stepped out of the shower. "Love, are you ready soon? Luke will be here in about twenty minutes." You heard your husband call out for you, from which you presumed to be the kitchen or living room.

"Umm, yeah, I, uh, need to get dressed and perhaps put on a little make-up, but beside that..." An answer came immediately. "Shall I help you, darling? Or do you get along alone?"

You wanted to think about Tom's offer for a moment, but your mouth was faster than your brain. "Yes, please!"

"Alright! Just let me take off my suit jacket and shoes again!"

Now you kind of had a guilty conscience.

"Babe, you don't have to get halfway undressed just to help-" But it was, of course, already too late. Tom appeared no minute later in the bedroom, just in a navy blue shirt and tie, matching navy blue suit trousers and - black socks. "Yes, I have to, darling. No excuses. It's my obligation to help you," Tom stated, while making his way over to you and pressing a soft kiss on your cheek; palms came to rest on your six-month baby bump. "After all, I'm this little bean's dad," he announced; wearing one of his dazzling smiles.

Well, that was true. He had a point.

You couldn't help but smile and placed your forearms on his shoulders; fingers buried in his long blond-brown locks. "Okay," you said; nodding. "Thank you." Tom smiled even wider and turned his head to press a soft kiss against the bare skin of your arm; his scruff slightly tickling and scratching you.

"Now, let me help you." You nodded and turned to pick up your matching white dress from the bed. Tom being the gentleman and caring husband he was, helped you even to step inside; making sure that you didn't lose your balance. Then he zipped the zipper of the dress up; warm fingertips brushing your skin. It sent a shiver down your spine.

Once you were fully dressed, you took a look at yourself in the full-length mirror. The dress was new. You had never worn it before. How could you, with the steadily growing baby within your womb? Impossible. That dress would fit you probably not even a month...

"And?" Tom stepped behind you; hands on your hips and pulling you against your chest. "What do you think?"

You bit your lip; giving yourself a once-over. You gently turned from side to side in his embrace; getting a look from each angle. "I-I, uh, I honestly don't know, Tommy... I mean, I like the dress. It's beautiful, but..." "But?"

You sighed; knowing that lying to your husband wouldn't work. "I... I feel like I look like a whale. I-I mean, I am huge..." You swallowed hard; feeling very insecure all of a sudden.

Behind you, Tom blinked in disbelief. "Apologies... What did you just say, darling?" "That, uh, that I look like a... whale..." Your voice was barely above a whisper. The words hadn't even left your lips entirely, when the Brit started to shake his head. "Oh, no, no, Mrs. Hiddleston. I see what you're doing - and it's not good. I won't let you walk down that dark path."

Tom turned you gently in his embrace; pointer finger and thumb cupping your chin. "Look at me, darling." You complied; your eyes meeting his stunning ones. "You are neither huge nor do you look like a whale. Do I need to remind you that you are pregnant and that it's more than normal for your body to change?" "Y-Yes, but-"

"Ah.Ah," Tom interrupted you immediately. "Apologies, darling, but no. No buts. If you are anything, then beyond beautiful. Stunning. The prettiest woman I have ever laid my eyes upon. Nothing less than a goddess." You gasped; feeling your heart skip a few beats. "A-A goddess?"

Tom nodded. "A goddess, yes. Your skin is glowing. You look more radiant than ever. Your curves are..." He took a short break; licking his lips and swallowing hard. "...absolutely delicious. Drop-dead sexy. To me, Y/N, you are even more attractive than you've already been. I can't take my eyes off you. Especially not since your pregnancy really started to show."

You were kind of overwhelmed by his words; not having expected this. "Y-You really think that?" You asked; still a bit uncertain.

Tom smiled; his other hand giving your hip a soft squeeze. "Darling, would I ever lie to you?"

Your eyes widened. "N-No! Of course not!" He kissed your forehead. "See?"

You blushed.

"Now do you believe me, or do I have to show you how much I desire your body, once we get back home tonight?"

You wetted your lips; suddenly feeling bold. Tom's words had finally gotten through. Especially the last ones.

"Hmm, perhaps, you should yes," you answered; hand playing with his tie. Tom chuckled darkly; his hand on your hip sliding down to give your ass a small, playful slap. "Gladly."

Tags: @muddyorbsblr @mochie85 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @multifandom-worlds @jennyggggrrr @huntedmusicgardenn @hisredheadedgoddess28 @stupidthoughtsinwriting @fictive-sl0th @loz-3 @javagirl328 @icytrickster17 @jaidenhawke @eleniblue @lou12346789 @lady-rose-moon @km-ffluv @herdetectivetheorist @lokiforever @crimson25 @simping-for-marvel @cakesandtom @vanilla-daydreaming @kimanne723 @glitchquake @lulubelle814 @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @buttercupcookies-blog @november-rayne @mandywholock1980 @lokidbadguy @smolvenger

[anthony-crowleys]

Ok but I can't stop mulling over this exchange in ep. 6 between Mae-Posing-As-Osha and Sol, "I had to lose a lot of myself in order to become a Jedi. [...]" And him responding "I'm sorry if it felt that way."

Like.

Number one, did he not felt this way too, even just a little?

I think that abiding to that strict moral code, trying to rein in strong emotions and finding balance would take a toll on almost everyone, more or less (some people are clearly more inclined to a lifestyle like that and are very proficient at it, like Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, Yoda etc., but clearly it's not for everyone, see Luke and Anakin and now Osha).

Is this an indicator that no, he was perfectly fine within the set rules of the Jedi lifestyle and what transpired on Brendok was just a natural slip up that could have happened to every other well-meaning Jedi.

Or… That he didn't felt like he had to change at all and never really did?

He grew up and remained an emotional man, prone to be led by his gut feelings, and nobody had a problem with that because he is a gentle and warm person that doesn't create problems and kinda decided to let it slide until it blew up in their faces but they don't know that yet?

(But the council acknowledged that he was still not mature enough to have a padawan, at least that is what I gathered in that conversation with Indara in ep. 7. They knew he wasn't ready. I also wonder how the whole "We don't think you are ready but oh look you now have a child you say you feel a strong connection with sooo ok you can be her master let's see how it goes!" thing went down.)

And then after Brendok he didn't felt that he needed to change that much, just "lesson learned now I'll be more careful" and that was it? And maybe being responsible for Osha is what helped him become more wise and controlled?

That line makes it seem like it's a foreign concept to him, having to shed and set aside things about your character in order to fit in a somewhat thight mold like the one the Jedi code requires. He was quick to confide that he left home when he was younger than her and that he felt different from his family, so I guess that if he also shared this sentiment, he would have said so.

And number two, worded that way it seems like this is news for him? Did he not notice that Osha struggled too much?

I mean, we don't know how/why she left the Jedi order yet, and that fact alone must have been a strong indicator that she was not in the right place, but still, how is Sol taking in these words?

As a further confirmation that she was unhappy there or as a surprise, because he thinks he failed her by not being a good master and that it's solely his fault that she didn't thrive in the Jedi order? This could tie in neatly with that "Perhaps I wasn't a very good teacher." line from episode two, that there is an underlying sense that he thinks he was not good enough and failed at the one thing that he cared about more than anything that defines this character.

And, at least to me, it's still unclear whether or not Sol knew at this point if this was Mae or he thought he was talking to Osha, because if he knew, this was just a "Let's give a vague but somewhat fitting answer even though I know this is not true" kinda thing and my time thinking about this whole exchange is being wasted ig.

[mykingdomforasong]

"You make a great pillow" for skysolo?

[morning after prompt list]

~

Luke always assumed that waking up in bed with Han was more of an inevitability than a fantasy. They flirted enough. Kissed a few times. Han had even beat him off once when he'd come back rock hard for a dicey run-in with Imperial fighters. That it took this long was the real surprise. Luke had thought maybe on Hoth, or after Endor.

It almost felt strange now, to be twenty-nine and find out for the first time that Han Solo, the pirate he met in a canteena ten years ago, liked to cuddle afterwards.

Luke was starting to sweat though, as his friend's body heat and the rising sun warmed the small room he'd made for himself on Yavin 4. Han's head was resting on his chest, an arm thrown over him, holding him close, and their legs tangled together under the thin blanket. Luke untangled his legs without waking Han and managed to kick free of the blanked, relieved to feel cool air on his bare legs.

A little less over heated now, he let his eyes close again, one arm reaching over to rest next to Han's. When it wasn't so hot, it was pretty nice to sleep next to him.

~

The sun was higher, brighter, and hotter when his eyes opened again. This time he was woken up by Han rolling and away from him.

"Good morning," was all Luke could think to say as he watch Han stretch his arms over his head, his back to him. It didn't feel strange being in bed with him. Sex with him had felt completely natural; they'd fallen into an easy rhythm together, as if they'd known the ins and outs of each other's bodies for as long as they'd known each other. Luke had expected the morning to be more of the same, but now, with Han actually awake, he found he didn't quite know what to say to him.

Han made it easy, like he always did. He turned to face him; his skin had gotten pale from long months of space travel, and it seemed to drink in the sun now, shining the light back in a pale gold glow. Luke bit the inside of his lip, waiting to see what Han might say.

"No need to be shy," Han said, rolling back into bed and on top of Luke, holding himself up on all fours. Neither of them had bothered to put clothes back on last night, and with the blanket pushed off of them ... Luke couldn't help himself. He tried to peak between their two bodies to get a good look at Han. But his gaze was noticed right away. No one had ever accused Luke of being a subtle person.

"It's not much to look at," Han said.

Luke reached a hand up, letting his finger trace the faded scar on Han's chin. "I like it," he said, "well enough."

Han laughed. "I'll take 'well enough.' You make a good pillow, you know."

"Yeah, well, you radiate heat like Dune Sea at midday," Luke said.

Han smirked and shrugged as best his could in his position. Han ran a hand through Luke's hair, gently avoiding the tangles they'd made the night before.

"You know," Luke felt a finger trace over his cheek, then down his collar bone as Han talked, "you should come with me when I take off. I've caught wind of some things you might be interested in."

Han's brown eyes were looking at Luke's chest as he talked, tracing over lines of muscles as he did. He'd made this offer to Luke before, more than once. Luke always had to give the same answer. But something about this morning was making Luke reconsider.

"What kinds of things?" Luke asked.

"Imperial remnants. Jedi activity. Black market goods." Han's finger traced his jaw, then settled on Luke's lip. Luke felt his heart rate pick up in anticipation of the kiss.

"That does sound interesting," he confessed. Han kissed him gently -- so gently it was almost frustrating. The delicate peck left Luke in anticipation. He felt his back arch up, his body searching for something Han wasn't giving him. If Han noticed Luke's needs, he didn't say anything.

"Come with me," Han said. "We'll have a good time. And the temple will be here when you get back."

"You're seducing me," Luke teased.

"I already did that. Now I'm just making an offer," Han said. But his hips started to lower, the skin of his upper thigh ghosting over Luke's.

"How long would we be gone?" Luke asked.

"Well that's the beauty of it," Han leaned down and kissed him again, longer and deeper this time. "We get to decide."

[mikomiproblemateke]

TW: CANNIBALISM

--------------------

The forbidden fruit is said to be sweet, but only for people. For holy beings like the archangels, the forbidden fruit is more poisonous and dangerous than fire, capable at best of burning wings or driving someone crazy.

After a certain tempting serpent got into the garden of Eden, feeding the forbidden fruit to Adam and Eve, all the archangels began to be wary not only of what surrounds them, but also of each other. Not to say that there was some kind of split in their team, but as if they were not telling themselves something, and this is already felt most strongly.

"Mr. Death!" Luke's playful nicknames somehow helped to cope with the situation. "Let me treat you to these fruits."

Morningstar passes over some juicy pale red apples. They look so appetizing that even Samael had a certain feeling of hunger. The temptation was enormous, to which Volkov, to his own regret, succumbed. Although he was young, by the standards of the archangels, he should have had some kind of willpower, as he himself believed.

Luke hurriedly left, not wanting to interfere with his friend, and Samael just twirls the apple in his hands. He decided to try it, why not?

The taste of the fruit was so sweet that I didn't want anything else. It is impossible to achieve such a taste on your own – the hand of God is clearly attached to this. And only one fruit had such a taste...

The forbidden fruit had already penetrated the archangel's body, was already poisoning his mind, was already beginning to beckon with more cruel, perverted temptations. Everything seemed so pleasant and inviting that Samael himself did not notice how he had killed one of the reapers in his office.

The wings were stiff and the feathers only got stuck in the teeth. Definitely not the best part of their body, unlike their warm flesh, which only grew colder in his hands over time. Skin, veins, blood... It's so delicious that it's impossible to break away. And even when the young reaper's body did not leave any tasty parts behind, Samael began to eat the remains of his darling. Ah, their soul... The Reaper got caught with a delicious soul that gave Volkov strength. He felt something pleasant pass through his body, but it was so little. One soul is not enough. He need more, more, more! Oh, he started to go crazy, but how fucking good it is!

***

"Killing about a hundred of your own reapers, Samael..." there is disappointment and hopelessness in Uriel's once neutral voice. He expected from anyone, but not from Volkov. "Do you have any excuses?"

No, there are none. He succumbed to the influence, which caused him to lose control of both himself and his powers. With just a glance, he could kill all the angels present, so he has a bandage on his face and shackles on his hands.

"It was good for me." he answers with a smile. He didn't seem to care how many mournful, judgmental, and anxious looks were on him. He felt good at that moment. He wasn't going to give up on the pleasure.

There was silence. Cassiel doesn't know where to put herself, Gabriel is afraid, Michael is desperate, and only Luke remained neutral. Suddenly Uriel breaks the silence:

"Samael Volkov, the former archangel of death and the commander of reapers, is guilty. As punishment for your crimes, you will be banished to hell with your wings torn out. The trial is over.

After that, Uriel is removed. No one else saw him. And Samael was taken out, and then the wings were really torn out. This is a really terrible fate for an archangel, literally one of the most painful things he can experience.

Before he was exiled, he muttered.

"I'll be back for you two."

After these words, even Luke felt uneasy. Even if Samael was exiled, his words against him can be convincing at least for Cassiel, and she, in turn, is not someone who is easily befuddled even by love and sweet nothings.

It's only a matter of time before the true culprit of the forbidden fruit case reveals their face.

--------------------

[yellowsugarwords]

You know how you did the ericson kids taking care of a severely injured s/o? Could you please do the same for the cabin crew?

THE ANGST I love it when y’all give me angsty things to write lol it fuels me

the original with the ericson kids is right here!

Luke: Luke refused to leave Y/N’s side. He couldn’t stomach the thought of leaving them all alone after all they’d been through. They had been beaten and bruised, but not bitten. As depraved as it sounded, that was all Luke could hope for. He was slipping in and out of sleep as the sun rose, he heard a groan to his left. His eyes snapped open, and he slid closer to Y/N, kneeling at the side of the couch where they were resting. “Y/N,” he said softly, brushing his fingers against their cheek. “Can you hear me?” Y/N groaned. “Yes,” they managed to say. “Here,” Luke hushes, propping them upright with another pillow behind their head. “I made you tea.” Y/N smiled weakly, opening their palms to accept the warm cup. “How did you know when I would wake up?” “I didn’t,” he said softly. “I’ve been warming it up every half hour since midnight.” Y/N0 smiled, cheeks gaining a flicker of color as the two smiled. Luke brushed his fingers through their hair soothing as they slipped away, the warm morning sun kissing their skin.

Nick: Nick wanted to sleep, but couldn’t. Every time he closed his eyes, all he could see was that scene. He was exhausted, but his mind wouldn’t let him relax. It was a good thing, however. It meant he could stay up and monitor Y/N’s condition. He sat in the corner of the room, watching over Y/N as they slept. Hearing movement, Nick snapped to his feet rushing to the side of the bed. “Y/N,” he breathed out, relieved to see their eyes open again. “Here,” he quickly grabbed the water bottle he had brought in for them and brought it to their lips, encouraging them to have a sip. “How are you feeling?” Heart the water aside, brushing some of their hair away from their face. “Can I get you anything? Are you hungry?” Y/N’s small, weak smile put his chest at ease. “I missed that smile.” Y/N chuckled lightly, trying to not laugh enough that it hurts their chest. “Take it easy, hun.” He said softly, giving their frail hand a small squeeze of reassurance.

Carlos: Carlos was bouncing his leg up and down: a habit to get rid of nervous energy. He had been up for hours - it felt like days - but knew he couldn’t leave Y/N’s side. Their condition was horrific, to put it lightly. Carlos had placed them by the window in the living room so they could still get some sunlight. So they could still hear the sounds of nature. Hearing them shift in their spot, Carlos’ head snapped up from his hands. “Y/N,” he said softly. He brought his chair closer to them, taking one of their cold hands in his warm ones. “Thank goodness,” “What happened?’ they managed out, their voice hoarse and quiet. Carlos smiled weakly, thankful they didn't remember the attack itself. “There was an attack,” he began gently, not wanting to scare them. “You got hit in the crossfire. But, you should make a smooth recovery.” “Recovery?” They asked, eyes weakly opening. “How long?” Carlos frowned, reaching a hand forward to brush their hair away from their eyes. “I’m not sure. A few months.” Y/N sighed, leaning back into their pillow, eyes closed and dejected. “Please,” Carlos said, drawing closer still. “Let me make you some breakfast and coffee. Then we can talk. But first, rest.” Y/N turned, eyes sad and broken, but managed to meekly smile at him and nod. “Thank you,” they said genuinely. Carlos could feel his heart quicken. “I’ll be right back.”

Alvin: Alvin nervously paced the room where Y/N was resting, waiting for them to come to after being given the medication Carlos had administered. “It’s to help with the pain and helps them sleep,” Carlos had explained. Both things desperately needed for them to recover. Alvin every few paces turned to see if Y/N had stirred yet. Then, finally, one time he turned and Y/N was staring out the window, eyes squinted, and brain foggy. “Y/N,” he said quickly, darting to their bedside and sitting beside them. “I’ve been terrified. How are you feeling?” He placed a hand on their forehead, adjusted their blankets and pillows, and brushed a hand against one of their cheeks. Y/N smiled, setting their pale, weak hand on top of his. “Sleepy.” Was all they were able to muster. “I’m sorry to have worried you.” “You’re sorry?” Alvin scoffed under his breath, chuckling at the idea. “I should apologize to you for letting this happen.” Y/N weakly and slowly shook their head. “Accidents happen. No one but them are to blame.” Y/N smiled, thankful for the company after emerging from sleep. They wanted, even needed, to talk to someone. Thank God her someone was Alvin.

Rebecca: Rebecca, at first, was shielded throughout the attack. The only moment she felt injured was when she noticed Y/N collapse. She felt as though part of her had been shot too; the part of her that loved them. All of her being. Every fibre and muscle felt as though it was crying. By the time Carlos had finished working on them and had allowed Rebecca into the room, they looked as though they had been hit by a train. “Oh, Y/N,” she hushed, eyes teary. Her voice caused them to stir, opening their eyes and instantly smiling seeing her. “There you are,” she smiled, tears falling. “Don’t cry,” Y/N said, lifting a hand, wanting to brush them away. Instead, Rebecca did it and took their hand between both of her own. “I’ve just been so worried about you.” Y/N chuckled softly. “I’ll be fine. Look at how much better I look today.” Rebecca smiled, more tears naturally falling, so happy they were comfortable enough to joke around. She brought their hand to her cheek and pressed it there, thankful she still had a hand to hold.

Bonnie: Bonnie was stationed outside of Y/N’s door, nervously pacing the hallway. Carlos was finishing up his work on them but insisted it just be the two of them in the room. He didn’t want anyone else to be horrified. He also didn’t want anyone in his way. Finally, the door creaked open. “How bad is it?” Carlos sighed, almost dejected. “It’ll take a lot of recovery, but they’ll be fine. You can see them now.” The sentence had barely left his lips when Bonnie rushed in, sitting on the edge of Y/N’s bed and taking their hand. “Oh my God, Y/N,” Bonnie said softly, using her free hand to brush at their cold, pale cheeks. “I’m fine,” they said through a pained chuckle. It looked like it hurt them to smile, let alone laugh. “Just rest, okay?” Bonnie said quietly. She rushed out of the room after reassuring them they’d be okay, then returned with soup, tea, and water. “This is the best I have for comfort food,” she said softly, returning to the corner of their bed. Gingerly, she helped them eat and drink, only wanting to make them comfortable.

𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘮 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 💌☕️♡

[not-krys]

85. Spiral (Simeon & Miri)

Happy New Year! I'm gonna try and keep going with my resolution from last year and continue with my 100 Themes Challenge. Only one OC was sparking ideas with this theme, but that's okay! It's progress!

Raw, unedited writing below. Takes place around the beginning of Season 3 of OG Obey Me. Forewarning that there is going to be some talk of suicidal ideation.

-----

The little bell above the door jingled a small tune, catching Simeon's attention.

"Ah, sorry, we're-"

He then sees Miri's pink curly hair bouncing behind her as she closes the door.

"Well, there's a familiar face." He smiles as he wipes his hands on a small towel. "Welcome to the shop, Miri."

"Ah, thank you. I was worried when I saw the closed sign."

"Just taking a break to clean up after the lunch rush. And I sent Luke on an errand, so we'll be back open again in no time."

"That's good."

"Do you want anything? It's on the house."

"N-No, I'm okay."

"If you're sure? There's some apricot cake that's just about ready to serve for the rush hour crowd though, and I think you'll really like it."

He could see the conflict on her face, weighing in the options and he grinned. The Miriam he knew would never say no to sweets.

"Well… maybe just a small piece… please?"

Simeon laughed gently.

"Personally, I would have given you the entire cake if you'd ask me."

"I couldn't eat an entire cake by myself!"

"We do have to-go boxes, Miri."

"No, no, just a small piece! That's enough for me."

"Very well, then."

Simeon slipped into the back of the little cafe, the smell of baked cake and apricots filled the kitchen and drifted into the main eating area. Just as promised, he cut a small piece of the still warm cake, plating it smartly with some sides of other small fruit pieces. The tea he had started preparing was also finishing up, so he poured his guest a fresh cup, the floral scent tickling his nose.

When he returned to the dining area, he saw Miri staring at her left hand, twisting the ring on her finger.

"One small slice of apricot cake, just as requested." He said after a pause.

Miri's eyes lit up briefly, taking in the sight of the delicate sponge.

"Thank you, Simeon. It looks so good!"

"Well, I hope it tastes as good as it looks!" Simeon laughed as he sat across from her, setting down her cake and tea cup.

"It is good! Sweet but not too sugary sweet. "

"I'm glad you like it!"

The two sat in silence as Miri enjoyed her little treat. Simeon smiled warmly, happily seeing her enjoying herself. It wasn't that long ago he had to pull her away from Lucifer, both having the Night Dagger between them. His heart still races thinking back to that moment, two people that were precious to him were so bent on destroying themselves for the greater good, both in a spiraling depression. It didn't sit well with him any more than it did back then.

When Miri finished her cake, Simeon looked at the ring on her finger again. Though magic had shrunk it down to fit her, it still was quite the statement, large and ornate, and in an older style not quite known in the human world.

"How have you been doing, Miri?" Simeon asked. "Since you've come back to the Human Realm?"

"Good," she replied, "I'm surprised Diavolo allowed for Lucifer and the others to have a vacation here."

"I'm sure they begged him relentlessly for it." Simeon laughed, imagining the look on the Devil Prince's face when he was sure six begging puppy eyes and an exasperated seventh set asking to see their beloved human again.

"I think… they might've still be worried about me… after what happened after exams."

"You did give all of us the scare of our immortal lives."

He still remembers the way Luke cried when he thought his best human friend was dead, the way Miri was passed out for days after receiving the Ring of Light, the ring gracing her hand now.

"I was scared too. Really… really scared."

Simeon placed his hand on top of hers.

"It was a scary time. If you want to talk about it, I'm more than happy to listen."

"You were there, though."

"I wasn't in your head, so I couldn't know what you were thinking then."

She paused, looking down at her hand again.

"My head hurt… so did my heart. Everything was hurting…"

She took a breath.

"Holding the Night Dagger… Lucifer looking at me like that… I just… I couldn't do it."

Simeon nodded, tightening his hand on hers.

"Then, I had a thought… If it was me causing all of this… that if it was me that was going to destroy all the worlds…. then maybe I should be the one…. who should… who should…"

"Take your time, Miri. I'm right here."

"I knew I wasn't going to kill Lucifer… I couldn't… but… maybe… if it was me that… that disappeared… then… then things could go back to normal again."

Miri bit her lip, closing her eyes.

"I was ready to help the Devildom in any way I could… Everyone… Lucifer and everyone… Diavolo… And you and Luke too… if I could save all of you… then…"

She shuddered.

"But…" her lip quivered, "I am glad that… that you stopped me, Simeon."

His thumb rubbed the back of her hand.

"Lucifer wanted to stop me too, but… he would have stabbed himself if I'd let go of that … that stupid knife! He… he wanted my pain to stop, that's all it was… he wanted to stop my pain, even if it meant sacrificing himself…"

"Lucifer cares a lot about you."

"I-I know he does. We care a lot about each other. But… e-even using the Stay command… I- I couldn't stop him, not completely. I couldn't concentrate and… he's so much stronger me… I was so scared then, Simeon."

"Why were you scared?"

"I… Is it bad to say… that I was more scared of losing him than of all the realms getting destroyed?"

Simeon shook his head.

"Not at all. You love Lucifer. You care for each other, like I said. It wouldn't have been selfish for you to think that, especially in a moment like that."

"I hated myself then… that I was thinking more of not wanting to kill Lucifer rather than the greater good of the three realms. It was selfish of me."

"Not especially," said Simeon.

"Still, if you hadn't had come when you did…" Miri wiped at her eyes with her other hand.

"I'm glad that I could have helped both of you. I don't regret saving both of you."

"Again… thank you, Simeon. For helping us."

"I'd do it a hundred times if it was asked of me."

"And I'll thank you as many times as you do save us."

Simeon smiled, reaching out to brush aside her remaining tears.

"You're both special to me, Miri. If I can find a way to help you, I will."

"And, I'd do the same for you too!"

"Just be sure to not get into any more world-shattering trouble. Once was enough for all of us, I think."

Miri giggled softly.

"I'll try not to. I'm still getting used to having magic at all, so I don't know what that's going to entail for the future."

"Well, you have plenty of support behind you on your life's journey. We're here for you if you need us, all you have to do is reach out your hand and ask."

"Thank you, again, Simeon."

"My pleasure."

Miri smiled again, putting her hand on top of Simeon's.

"And, if you need it, I want you to reach out to me too. I've still got a lot to learn, but I hope that I can be someone you can rely on too."

"You already are." he said gently, "Even if you don't know it, you do help me in ways that both warm my heart and set my mind at ease."

Miri nodded and pulled her hands back, taking the delicate tea cup in her palms.

"It's cooled a little bit."

"I can make some more if you want."

"No, that's okay. You'll need to get back to work soon, right?"

"As soon as Luke gets back, so I've got plenty of time."

"What kind of errand did you send him on?"

"Supply order. We some more things for the cafe and I think he wanted the excuse to go outside."

"It is a beautiful day outside."

"Do you have any plans with the brothers this afternoon?"

"…No, not really."

"You can stay here, if you want to. I'm sure Luke would like to see you too."

[floatyflowers]

The Adopted Princess| Dark! Targaryen and Velaryon Boys x Reader (Aegon II, Aemond, Jacaerys, Lucerys) Final Part

Part VIII

"I would prefer if you stay here with me, Daenerys might need you" 

You place your hand on the large book without hesitation, already made up your mind about your decision to escort Luke to Storm's end to ensure Lord Baratheon's loyalty.

"Mother, I swore loyalty to you, we need this to be handled carefully," you say, causing Rhaenyra to give you a warm smile.

Ever since you arrived at Dragonstone with Rhaenys and your daughter, you never left her side, always making sure she is safe.

Especially after Visenya's death, you have been by her side the whole time, comforting her and supporting her decisions.

The fact that you abandoned your husband, the father of your daughter, just to stand by her side, showed how you love her as she loves you.

"I swear to not fight unless Lord Baratheon starts bitching-" Rhaenyra is quick to cut you off.

"(Y/n)" Rhaenyra warns, yet, her smile does not disappear from her face

"I swear, mother," you say, this time with a serious voice and expression.

"Are you sure you don't want to come with me to Winterfall?" You chuckle nervously.

"I would rather not, the last time I danced with Cregan Stark at my wedding, I made him sad"

Indeed, the first time you met Lord Stark was at your wedding, he was infatuated with you the second he laid his eyes on you.

He offered that you run away with him in secret when you confessed by accident that you didn't want to marry Aemond.

Clearly, you turned him down without thinking.

"Don't worry, I will protect (Y/n)" Luke says confidently, even if he was scared.

He didn't want to appear scared especially in front of the girl he admired his whole life, you.

You pat Luke's shoulder, kissing his cheek which made him blush.

"My prince in shining armor" 

As you walk with your brothers to their and your awaiting dragon, Jacaerys confesses.

"Do you remember, the fight at your wedding between Lord Stark and Lord Lannister?" you nod your head at him.

"Jace and I caused to ruin the wedding" Luke continues for his older brother"

The two wait for your reaction, but instead, you chuckle at them.

"I know, and I forgive you both"

After all, Larys Strong was the one to inform you about that.

"Do you know that we also have fallen for you" your face heats up in embarrassment at Jace's words

"I will pretend I didn't hear anything"

𖣔𖣔𖣔

It was a shock to you and Luke to find Aemond already raced you there to Storm's end and earned Lord Baratheon's loyalty.

For the offer of marrying his daughters to very high lords.

Right now, Arrax and Quicksilver are trying to get away from Vhagar in between the mountains.

Aemond made his goal clear back at the court, he wants one of Luke's eyes as revenge and will bring you back home by force.

He already set a plan to have someone bring Daenerys back home.

You and the Dany are his family, and Aemond will stop at nothing to have you both returned into the safety of his and your quarters.

It took a few minutes to finally reach what you think to be the safe zone away from Vhagar and the storm.

You and Luke smile at each other, thinking that you two have finally escaped after Arrax attacks Vhagar's neck with fire.

But the happiness gets replaced by tragedy when the she-dragon suddenly appears out of nowhere.

"VHAGAR, NO, DON'T"

You didn't hear Aemond pleas as you watch Vhagar rip Luke and his dragon to pieces with her sharp teeth causing them to fall into the water.

Your mind is still trying to process that the boy you consider your brother and best friend just died in the worst and bloodiest way.

But when you finally realize that, you turn your teary gaze to stare at your husband, not allowing him to explain as one word escapes your lips.

"KINSLAYER"

A/n:This is the first part of this series, the second part shall be released when season two comes out, thanks for the support 💖💖💖

[beels-burger-babe]

Storm Clouds on a Sunny Day

***Oooooo Teen!MC! Thank you for the request @lovevictoire! Now, although I think I'm technically Gen z??? (I could be a millennial. I have no idea). I have like 0 sense of most pop culture and probably won't be able to write that classic gen z chaotic humour properly, so I'm not going to attempt. What I can do is the hurt/comfort aspect of this which I LOVE! So, let's do this. I hope you enjoy it. ((Oh and before I forget *hugs*))***

Summary: MC has always been a happy positive ray of light that brought joy with them wherever they went; at least that's what the brothers and the other exchange students would tell you. But when they suddenly start getting quiet and begin isolating themselves, everyone is concerned.

TW: descriptions of grief.

In the darkness of the Devildom, you were the sun.

Since arriving in the dark, cruel world of the demons, you had reminded them how to smile, how to laugh, how to love. With you around, it was like the brothers had another sibling again. For the other exchange students, you were a breath of fresh amongst all the horror and despair of the Devildom.

In short, everyone had come to love and be incredibly fond of the teenage human that; which is why they noticed instantly when you weren't acting like yourself.

For starters, you had skipped breakfast, which greatly concerned Beel. The friendly giant had to go up and bring you your food afterwards.

He gently knocked on your door with one hand as he held a plate with way too much food on it in the other. "MC? Are you awake? You missed breakfast."

There was a small curse from the other side before he heard some shuffling. The door cracked open to reveal you wrapped in a bundle of blankets. It wasn't until you looked up that Beel got a good look at your face and his stomach dropped.

Your eyes were tinged red with tear tracks stained onto your cheeks. Your bottom lip was still trembling from the effort of not breaking down into sobs. There was not a trace of the sunshine child that you usually were inside of your stormy sad eyes.

Beel's heart broke as you still attempted to give him a small smile and took the plate from him. "Th-Thanks Beel."

He kept a hand on the door to prevent you from closing it. "MC, are you alright? What happened?"

Your eyes widened a little and you quickly wiped at your cheeks. "I-I'm just not feeling that well. Can...Can you tell Lucifer I'm taking a sick day?"

Beel nodded as concern grew stronger and stronger inside of him. "Of course. Whatever you need."

You weren't actually sick, Beel could tell that much. What you were was heartbroken. Something had reached into your soul and shattered it into pieces. He to ask you what it was. He wanted to reassure you that everything would be okay. But instead, he let you close the door and hurried back to his brothers.

His brothers looked at him skeptically as he arrived, noting the lack of a tiny human alongside him. It was Belphie, however, who noticed the distressed look on Beelzebub's face. "Beel, is everything alright? You look upset."

Beel simply shook his head and looked over to Lucifer. "MC has asked me to tell you that they would like to take a sick day."

Everyone was instantly on their feet in worry.

"Sick? What kind of illness? I can get any medicine they might need and look up the quickest way for them to recover." Satan quickly stated as he began to move towards the kitchen.

Belphie nodded and picked up his pillow. "If they're sick, they'll need rest right? I'll go up there and help them sleep better."

Mammon moved to go with Belphie. "I'll come with ya. They'll feel better with if their favourite's there with them."

Belphie growled and shoved Mammon as Levi spoke up. "I-I mean, I doubt they'd want to spend the entire day with me, but at the very least I can provide them with some movies and games for entertainment. In fact, it might be easier if we just, um, m-move them to my room."

Mammon and Belphie were now snapping at Levi rather than each other.

Asmo scrunched up his nose in disgust and put up his hands. "Yeah, no thanks. I love MC, but I'll leave you guys to handle all the snot and vomit thank you very much. Tell them when they're healthy, I'll give them a spa day, just the two of us."

Lucifer sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Boys, Beel hadn't even told us what is wrong with them yet," everyone froze and turned to Beelzebub. Lucifer nodded and gestured for him to continue. "As you were saying, Beel."

Beel shifted uncomfortably at the attention. "Right. So, I don't think they're actually sick."

Lucifer rose an eyebrow at this as an air of defence grew around him. "You think they would lie?"

Beel huffed in annoyance and shook his head. "No. I don't think they would. But when they answered the door, they didn't look sick. They looked like they were grieving," everyone breathed in sharply at the statement, but Beel continued. "They honestly looked like they had been crying since midnight. I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't get any sleep at all last night."

Lucifer frowned and finally made a move towards the door. "I, and I alone, will go speak with them. We don't want to overcrowd them. In the meantime, someone please contact Simeon just in case they truly are sick and Beel misinterpreted it," he ignored the several shouts of protest as he walked to your room.

He knocked softly on the door twice before carefully opening the door. "MC? Beelzebub informed me that you aren't feeling-"

Lucifer cut himself off as he saw you hugging your knees to your chest in bed, sobbing your heart out. He quickly made his way over and sat down beside you, gently placing a hand on your back. "MC, what's the matter? I've never seen you this upset before."

You didn't answer. You merely turned towards him and buried your face in his chest as you clung to his shirt. Lucifer quickly wrapped his arms around you and held you tight.

It was almost as if he could feel your sorrow within the sounds of your cries. The way they shuttered and cracked with every inhale and vibrated with pure agony on every exhale. You were trembling violently in his arms in a way that he hadn't felt since-

Since he held his brothers after Lilith's death.

Realization came to him as he glanced over and noticed the lightly crumped picture of you and another human on your side table. His breath caught in his throat and he held you tighter. "Oh MC," he whispered softly. "I am so sorry."

He held you there, letting your tears stain his shirt without a single care. He held you as your sobs softened into sniffles. He held you as your head lolled to the side and you finally gave in to sleep.

Lucifer had been about to fall asleep himself when he noticed the door open. Simeon, Luke and Solomon stood there with equal expressions of concern.

Luke took one look at your tear-stained face before a flicker of fury and angelic protectiveness flashed across his face. He opened his mouth to shout at Lucifer, but was stopped as a hand came over his mouth.

Solomon looked down at him sternly. "They're sleeping, Luke, and clearly in need of it. You don't want to wake them."

Luke huffed and slapped Solomon's hand away before going over to the bed and climbing in beside you and Lucifer.

Simeon pulled out a bag that clinked and clattered from the vials within it. "Satan had said that there was a possibility MC was ill?"

Lucifer sighed and continued to rub circles into your back while Luke gently dried your face with a handkerchief. "Unfortunately it seems the only illness they have is a broken heart." He nodded to the picture on the nightstand. "They appear to have lost someone. Today must be an anniversary of some sort that reminded them of it."

Both Solomon and Simeon's faces softened at the explanation. Simeon put the bag away. "I'm afraid I don't have anything that can help with that."

Solomon nodded. "It's a feeling I believe we are all familiar with," he stood in silent thought before snapping his fingers and grinning. "I know what will cheer them up! Some soup! It most certainly cheers me up whenever I'm upset. I'll go make them a pot right away," he smiled proudly as he left the room, missing the look of horror on everyone else's face.

"Oh my," Simeon began, "I better go supervise and make sure he doesn't accidentally poison them. Luke, do you wish to come?"

He shook his head and hugged you. "I'm not leaving them."

Simeon smiled fondly and glanced up to Lucifer who shrugged. "So long as he doesn't mind being the presence of a demon, I suppose he can stay."

Luke grumbled and continued looking at your hand as he held his up to it and compared sizes. "If they were able to fall asleep around you and you were able to comfort them...maybe you're not so bad."

Simeon raised an eyebrow in shock and laughed a little. "Well there you have it," he looked back to Lucifer. "I'll be in the kitchen if you need anything."

He nodded and watched the older angel leave.

@thegrimgrinningghost

Although the day was a rough one for you, there was not a second where you felt alone. There was always someone to hold you, to listen to you, and comfort you when you needed it most.

On days when sadness and despair threatened to cloud over the Devildom's only source of sunshine, the lords of the Devildom and your friends would be there to keep you warm until the sun could shine again.

***I hope you enjoyed this cute little comfort fic! Thanks again for the request @lovevictoire!***

TAGLIST

@henry-and-the-seven-lords

@satans-beloved-riv

@cosmixbun

@sufzku

[lipstickstainz]

true lies - s. r. (14/15)

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Series Summary: Spencer is furious, when you rejoin the team after a year and after you left him, when he got arrested. Little does he know, that you leaving him was the only option to ever get him out of prison.

Chapter Summary: Leaving is the only option - right?

Warnings: angst, blood (but not much), break up, drug addiction (mentioned), alcohol consumption

Word Count: 3.3k

A/N: hello lovies. I'm back and my mind is full of ideas! I hope you like it! gif not mine.

Series Masterlist

previous chapter

You watch the coffee in your cup as if it has all the answers for the future hidden in the caffeine. It's eight o'clock in the morning, and this is already your third cup of the sacred liquid, and you're sure it won't be your last. The shadows under your eyes are a sign of your nightmares that haunted you last night. The fact that you have them doesn't bother you, after all, you've been going through the procedure for months. What bothers you is the fact that you couldn't wake yourself up this time. You've gotten in the habit of pinching yourself when it would get too painful, but something stopped you last night. And the fact that you don't know what exactly bothers you the most.

"Y/N." Emily's voice pulls you out of your thoughts and you have to tear your gaze away from your coffee. "What do you think?"

All eyes are on you and out of nervousness you'd like to slide around in your chair, but suppress the urge. You haven't been listening for the last few minutes, too busy with your own thoughts and problems that you can't answer her. The case is supposed to be your last, and you're trying hard to enjoy it and value the time with your friends, but really you're just waiting for it all to be over. Most of all, you want to pack your things and leave.

You barely noticeably shake your head for Emily to continue, and turn your attention back to your coffee, which must be cold by now, but that doesn't stop you from drinking it down to the last drop. Without saying anything, you get up from your chair to get another one, paying no attention to Emily's annoyed look. As you fill your cup in the precinct kitchen, she stands right next to you.

"You're not being very helpful, Y/N," she says coolly as you take a sip. You know her manner is all pretense, because in reality she's incredibly concerned. She only needs to look at your face once to know what's going on in your head, but she doesn't address it. She knows you'll talk to her when the time is right. But you're not sure that will ever happen. "I've already assigned the tasks. You stay here and work with Spencer to gather all the important information that may be relevant to Penelope's research." The look on your face says it all. You don't want to spend any time with Spencer, and certainly not alone, but Emily gives you no choice. Before you can say anything back, she disappears out the door with the others.

With your coffee, which you now wish had a strong shot of vodka in it, you make your way back into the conference room, where Spencer is bent over the table, passing pictures and notes back and forth. You stop in the doorway and watch him for a brief moment, and only then do you notice the narrow, red scratch on his face that stretches from his cheek to his neck. You squint your eyes. It hadn't been there yesterday after all.

"What happened?“, you ask as casually as you can as you sit down and set your cup down on the table. As Spencer looks at you questioningly, you point to his face. "Looks bad." Indeed it does, though it's just a scratch. There's bloody crust in a few places, contrasting in color with his pale skin. Something really got to him.

"Cut myself shaving“, he replies curtly, glancing again at the pictures in front of him. You haven't seen him in two years, don't actually remember who he is exactly, but you still know when he's lying. And when to stop asking and let it go. When Penelope calls, you discuss some stuff and you see Spencer scratching over the wound until it bleeds, which he doesn't seem to notice, which is why you stall Penelope on the phone and grab his hand as soon as the line goes silent. Astonished, he looks at you before looking at his fingers.

"Come with me“, you say briefly and don't even wait for him to follow you. You approach an officer and ask for a first aid kit, which is immediately made available to you. Spencer follows you uncertainly into one of the washrooms, where you already put on the disposable gloves from the box - you don't want any bacteria to get on the wound - and wet a towel from the towel dispenser. Reluctantly, Spencer leans against one of the sinks, waiting for your instructions.

"Tilt your head to the side a little, please." You take the damp cloth and gently dab along the scratch to remove the dried blood. Spencer has to swallow at the touch and you see his Adam's apple bob, and really it shouldn't be that attractive, unfortunately it is anyway. You have to concentrate because this is the closest you've been to him in years. You breathe in his scent, feel his warmth through your gloves, and can barely stifle a deep breath.

"How do you know how to do that?“, he asks softly as you disinfect the wound, and Spencer has to pull himself together to keep from reacting to the burning from the alcohol.

You look at him briefly before turning your attention back to the scratch. „Experience“, you reply, spreading some wound healing ointment over it before taking off your gloves and disposing of everything in the trash can. You then put the first aid kit back together. As you turn around, Spencer is standing right in front of you.

"You didn't tell me you were having nightmares“, he whispers, and confused, you look at him. There's concern in his gaze, and if you're not mistaken, a little affection too, but you push the thought aside, not letting yourself have hope. Hope has only harmed you lately you have not moved forward a bit.

You look once more at the scratch, and then into his warm eyes. "You didn't cut yourself shaving“, you count one and one together and clench your jaws. He doesn't need to answer. You did this to him, you just don't remember. The reason you didn't wake up is Spencer. He was probably holding you, reassuring you so much that your body turned off its protective mechanism. It had certainly been the last time he did that, and you hadn't been awake to enjoy it.

"Why didn't you tell me about this?“, he asks, wanting to reach for your hand, but you take a step back. You don't want him to touch you. You'd prefer it if you weren't in this situation at all. You'd prefer that you hadn't come back at all. None of this should have ever happened.

"It's none of your business anymore, Spencer." Your tone is cool and something in his face changes.

"I thought we were friends."

You have to suppress a laugh. Two years ago, you could have lived well with being friends with him. You were prepared for it then, wished it on him, and meant it sincerely. Only lately you've been through so much that you can't even imagine it anymore. The two years had been hell, but you are sure that you can't live next to him without being able to be with him. You can't watch him and Max be happy together, and even though his happiness is everything you want, you'd rather he be happy with you. But you can't tell him that, it would be unfair and selfish. So you just look at him.

Then you reach for the small suitcase and push past him towards the exit.

-

You're glad when the case is over and you arrive back at Quantico. It's been a week since you and Spencer spoke, and luckily for you, you've continued to be spared nightmares, for which you're quite grateful. Not that Spencer is going to join you in bed one more time to calm you down.

As you walk from the airfield back to the building, you fall back a bit, watching the team joke and laugh with each other despite their fatigue. Most of all, you'd like to leave right now without saying goodbye. Rip off the band-aid, without anesthesia. Short and painless. But your plan is foiled when Emily suddenly walks up beside you and puts a hand on your arm.

"We're going for a drink." She raises an eyebrow expectantly. Apparently she's waiting for you to decline the invitation, and all too gladly you'd like to meet her expectations, but it's almost certainly the last night you'll see each other, at least for an extended period of time, and short and painless wouldn't be fair to her - your best friend.

You smile at her. "You're paying for the first round."

Her eyes widen in delight, but before she can say anything back, Luke, who has overheard your conversation, interferes. "We're going out for drinks?" A grin spreads across his face, almost reaching his ears, and suddenly the rest of the team pricks up their ears. Luke's gaze is fixed on you. "I bet I can drink you under the table by now, Y/N."

„You can’t“, Matt replies, and you see Rossi smile to himself. "Last time you did that, you almost passed out after four shots."

"JJ got the drinks. Maybe she mixed something in“, Luke tries to defend himself, but the blonde raises her hands.

"I'm not responsible for your kindergarten drinking. But I'd love to see you try to drink Y/N under the table." She smiles at you and winks, and you can't help but grin. It feels good to know that all is well between you and the team, even though they know with a high probability that you won't be staying. You'd understand if they were mad at you, but that doesn't seem to be the case. JJ looks at Spencer, who is being less than forthcoming. "You coming, Spence?"

He risks a quick glance in your direction before adjusting the bag on his shoulder. He knows this will be your last night. And that you won't see each other again after this. "I think I'll sit this one out“, he replies curtly, but JJ nudges him and he gives her a dirty look.

"You can't avoid it, Spence."

You'd rather he'd gone home.

The first drinks are on Emily, as promised, and the ones after that are on Rossi, and it's actually not long before Luke is sitting at the table with a glass of water, wishing he'd slowed down. You grin at him from the dance floor where JJ and you are swinging your hips, and he sticks his tongue out at you before putting his head in his hands and sipping water through the straw in his glass.

JJ reaches for your hand and pulls you close before wrapping her arms around your neck. "I'm going to miss you“, she almost yells so you can hear her over the loud music. You smile weakly at her. There's a glint in her eyes, probably from the alcohol, and only now do you realize how much you're really going to miss her.

"I'm going to miss you too“, you reply, risking a quick glance in Spencer's direction. He's sitting next to Luke, looking completely out of place. You look back to JJ and without further ado, she puts her hands to your cheeks and presses a kiss to your mouth. When she pulls away from you again, she just grins at you. "What was that for?"

"I want you to know that we love you. We all do. Remember that when you're lonely, and call if you need anything. You are and always will be a part of our weird family."

You wait a brief moment before pulling away from her and disappearing into the ladies' room. As soon as the door slams shut, tears stream down your cheeks and you have to hold onto the edge of the sink to keep from breaking down. You were aware of how much the others would miss you, but hearing it from JJ only makes it more real. By leaving, you're not only leaving Spencer behind, but everyone else as well, and that's so selfish of you that bile rises inside you and you almost throw up. You wish you hadn't had those last two drinks.

"Y/N?" You don't have to turn around to know it's Spencer. You recognized his voice and can see him in the mirror above the sink.He's standing behind you, unsure of what exactly to do, which is why he buries his hands in his pants pockets and looks at you silently.

You wipe the smeared mascara from under your eyes before turning and leaning against the basin. "This is the ladies' room, Spencer. You're not supposed to be in here.“

"I'm right where I'm supposed to be“, he replies, but doesn't move from the spot. He watches you brush your hair out of your forehead and wipe at your hot face to get rid of the tears. "You don't have to go. You know that, right?"

You look up from your shoes, straight into his eyes. "Yes, I do."

You want to leave the washroom, but his fingers curl around your arm, holding you back. "Y/N ..."

"I can't stay, Spencer. I can't look at you without knowing that someone other than me is waiting for you at home. I can't watch you be happy without me. It's okay, really. It's just that I don't have the strength to watch it anymore." The words just bubble out of you, and for some reason you can't stop. But it feels good to say it out loud, even though you certainly shouldn't. "I love you, Spencer. I'll always love you. But I'm at the end of my rope." You shrug in exasperation. "I have to think about me. I can only think about me." Spencer's face contorts painfully, but you can't stop. "To think that you're about to go to Max's and do God knows what ..." You shake your head, as if it might drive the thoughts from your mind. "I feel like I - I - I can't breathe. Like I'm going to die. And I just can't take it anymore."

Spencer's hand comes away from your arm at your honesty, but only to grab your hand and pull you against him. You bounce against his chest, wanting to pull away, but he holds you tight and presses you to him with his other hand. Carefully, he places his palm against your cheek and gently strokes your skin with his thumb. "Please, don't go."

You look into his eyes, which have filled with tears. "Why not?"

You can practically see him struggling with himself. He wants to say something, but can't find the right words, so he presses his lips together and lets his forehead sink against yours. All he has to do is say it, and you'd throw all your plans out the window and stick around. Just a few words. But he doesn't say them. "I can't ..."

You take a deep breath before pulling away from him, disappointed. „Goodbye“, you whisper, before leaving him alone in the washroom.

-

Spencer sits uncertainly at the kitchen table, watching the tea bag with lemon balm in the cup in front of him. He doesn't actually like lemon balm, but he needs something to calm his nerves and get the trembling of his hands under control as he sits there searching for the right words.

The last time he had felt this helpless, Emily had just left his apartment and he had been about to make some phone calls. The first call would have been to a man who would have given him a different number. The second phone call would have been to a woman who would have transferred him. And the third number belonged to someone who would have given him what he was only too happy to get.

Many years ago, he had sworn to himself that he would never resort to it again. That he wouldn't need it. He would be stronger than the desire to feel nothing more. The only thing that had stopped him was that you would never wish that for him. That you had helped him then, had stood by him. He didn't want it to be in vain.

Spencer hates feeling so helpless, even though he actually knows exactly what he has to do now. That's why he sits in the kitchen in the middle of the night, cup of calming tea in hand, not daring to look at the woman sitting across from him. But he doesn't need to say anything either. She knows why he was at her door at such a late hour. They sit in silence, neither quite knowing what to do. Neither of them has been in this situation before. Spencer is glad she's the first to speak.

"So that's it." It's more of a statement than a question. Spencer nods silently, whereupon she purses her lips. "Because of her?"

Spencer looks up from his cup and looks directly at Max. Then he shakes his head. "No, not because of her."

She raises an eyebrow. "But what? Don't you dare give me that 'it's not you, it's me' tour. I've heard that one before."

Spencer has to think for a moment, find the right words, before he answers. "I've lost her so many times. I wouldn't survive it another time."

The two have known each other long enough. Max knows he's not exaggerating or meaning it metaphorically. He has told her about his addiction, and she had been very grateful at the time that he was so honest with her, even though they hadn't known each other long. Spencer knows that all of this is not healthy and psychologically quite far from reasonable and Maxine knows what she has gotten herself into. But no one could have guessed that it would end this way.

"I'm sorry." Spencer's voice sounds hoarse and raspy. He stands up and makes his way toward the apartment door.

"I hope you make it." There's so much honesty in her voice that Spencer has to smile sadly over his shoulder.Maxine doesn't deserve this. None of you deserve this.

The walk to Emily's apartment is short, but to Spencer it feels like an eternity. The train is late, which is why he actually starts running, afraid of missing his chance. He runs until his lungs are burning and his bag is banging painfully against his ribs.The few people left on the streets look at him askance, but he doesn't care. He's panting, barely getting his breath and wishing he was a little more athletic, but as he sprints around the next corner he can already see the building where Emily's apartment is located.

For a brief moment he considers taking a break, catching his breath, but he can't wait another second. Hopefully he's not too late.

He's not surprised that he can just walk into the building, even though he doesn't have a key. He sprints up the stairs, and runs down the hallways until he's gasping for breath and standing in front of the right door, his head high. He bangs on the door with a clenched fist, hoping it will open and he won't be too late. He can't be late. He can't be late.

Finally, the door opens, and for the first time in years, he can take a real breath.

"Y/N."

- taglist closed -

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[percabeth4life]

I 100% agree with you that it would be so cool and is a missed opportunity for the Greeks to react poorly to Hazel bc of her eyes, but I am also very glad that Rick did not write it that way in canon. It would have left a bad taste in my mouth to read a canonically white man (even if I and many others hc Percy as a poc) be wary of Hazel, a black woman, bc of a physical feature she could not change. Even if it is bc of trauma, Hazel wouldn’t know that, (at least at first) and I would hate to have her feel like one of her friends and her potential allies are scared of her bc of her race (bc she was FRESH from the 1940s she would assume it was race bc it couldn’t be godly parentage bc he wasn’t afraid of Nico). And Percy wouldn’t have even been able to tell her the real reason why bc he didn’t know it himself! It would come off like he was brushing her off or dodging the question if she confronted him about it. Idk, I’m kind of glad that the narrative doesn’t paint Hazel as someone to be scared or wary of

I get that, like 100% I hadn't even really thought of that twist to it. But honestly that just emphasizes why he shouldn't have given her gold eyes.

This is coming from me, who literally shoves shining eyes on every character because it's my favorite magic trope like ever. Glowing eyes rock and gold eyes? Stunning. But with Hazel-

He literally wrote her with Gold eyes and did nothing with them, they're just there to make her look special which... is a problem.

If he was going to give her gold eyes they should've had a narrative relevance. Gold eyes were too much of a big deal with their meaning in PJO for it to just be tossed in and not used for anything other than looks.

Even if Percy himself didn't have a wariness of her, because of no memories at all, other's in the Titan war should've felt something. And even if we put a pass on Hazel (maybe because Percy is clearly so comfy with her the others aren't bothered so much, maybe because when Percy gets his memories back he already knows she's safe and a friend, maybe because Annabeth doesn't even notice until long after the first meeting because her eyes were only for Percy and while she felt some small discomfort at Gold eyes like Luke's when he was Kronos Percy trusted her and she trusted Percy and maybe even she studies Hazel for a long moment and determines that the Gold is different it's warm and gentle and caring instead of sharp and cold and cruel), the eidolons should've been a panic attack in the making.

Those are literally spirits possessing people that turn their eyes gold. Like I'm sorry you're throwing in Possession with Gold Eyes and not bringing up Kronos????

Basically yeah I get what you're saying, a good point, but that point also emphasizes why the gold eyes were bad to give Hazel. She should've had lovely deep brown/black eyes that were filled with warmth and hardened like stone when she was determined and going into battle. Eyes with depths you could drown in.

Either make them have a narrative purpose or let her have eyes actually matching Hades and Nico and most POC. She's the only black person in the seven! Don't give her magic eyes if they don't have a purpose!

[furiosophie]

For the fanfic end of the year asks: number 12 and 23?

12. favorite character to write about this year

prob surprising absolutely no one but it's this guy:

23. fics you wanted to write but didn’t

i think i actually got all of the ones i absolutely needed to write out of my system but i do have notes for a couple of dinluke's - one F1 AU, one AU that starts as the "i'm an ex-felon who can pretend to be your thanksgiving date" craigslist post and ends up in "aliens are real" territory, and one in-universe polit thriller set like three years after mando season 2 that's mostly about both din and luke slowly losing it bc they fucking hate politics lol

I'll leave snippets for each under the cut bc why not

F1 AU

“Luke wait–” Din says just when Luke finally finds the conviction to get his feet to move down his side of the hotel room hallway. His tone is soft, worried, just like it was at the track. Soft just like the hand he kept at Luke’s back all the way up the elevator. Something lurches in Luke's chest. He puts on his best reassuring smile – the one he gives Leia every time he declines her offer to talk to their in-house psychologist before a race – and turns back around.

“I got it from here, really–” and then his brain decides to shortcircuit because Din has the hand he’s not holding Grogu with stretched out towards him holding his hotel room key. Luke stares at it, not comprehending.

"My room key," Din says after a while, and oh, Luke could have sworn his voice sounded a lot more sure a second ago. And that it’s really not necessary to hold a piece of cheap plastic firmly enough to make it bend in the middle.

"Don't you need that?" Luke says but slowly takes the key anyways before it can snap in half. The plastic feels warm against his palm. Din pulls his hand away immediately to scratch the back of his neck instead.

"They gave me two,” he says. “But the kid doesn't really need one. You know. Where I go he goes."

"Ah, yes," Luke says as if he understands when he really doesn't.

"I just–" Din starts and Luke finds himself absolutely mesmerized by how all the confidence from the track seems to have completely left him.

"I know what it's like," Din finally says and seems to square up a little, looking up to meet Luke's eyes. "To not be okay, I mean. I know what that’s like. If you need anything or if you just don't want to be alone, we're right down the hall."

"Ah," Luke says again because he can't think of anything else to say and because there is this tuck right beneath his heart that makes him feel like he might be about to cry again. "Thank you."

"Don't mention it," Din says and seems to relax a little, that soft smile back on his lips. "I'll see you on the track. Goodnight!"

"Night," Luke echoes, helplessly, and watches them disappear down the hall.

thanksgiving alien AU

"You stole a baby?"

"I did not steal a baby," Din says and pinches the bridge of his nose with his free hand. The other is occupied holding a toddler. Boba snorts at the other end of the line.

"Oh excuse me," he says, voice mocking. "You rescued a baby you were previously contracted to steal."

Din opens his mouth to protest, then closes it again. Boba is not wrong. "Look," he says, "Can I hide out with you or not?"

"I'm not exactly flying under the radar right now, what with that whole Hutt business and all. And you very much need to be flying under the radar. So no."

"What do you suggest then?"

"It's Thanksgiving, any ex-girlfriends you can reunite with for a turkey dinner alibi?"

Din sighs while the toddler in his arms squirms to get high enough so he can put the collar of Din's jacket into his mouth. "No."

"Anyone around you you can romance into taking you home with them?"

"No."

"Hold on--" There is a rustling on the other line, a hushed voice in the background, probably Fennec. "Actually, wait say that again--" more rustling, then, "Have you ever seen that one Craigslist Thanksgiving meme --"

polit arc

"Why didn't you use the Force?" Leia asks quietly, the noise of Chandrila's traffic nearly drowning out her words. Luke can feel her unease at the back of his neck, dense and sticky.

"They are already afraid of me," he says and shifts his weight, leaning further back against the balustrade, head tipped back and dangling over the edge. He closes his eyes, reaches out into the city, his mind brushing over the million specs of life. "Punching someone in the face is easier to contextualize than someone catapulted into a wall with barely a flick of my wrist."

"And you had to punch him with your non-dominant hand?" she asks and then, even though the question very much does not need clarification adds, "You are right-handed you know."

"Not for a while now," Luke grins easily, eyes still closed. The marble floor of the balcony is cold against his bare feet, a stark contrast to the warmth he can feel radiating off Leia, that fondness buried beneath her exasperation.

She is silent for a while. Luke knows what she'll ask next. He doesn't dread it. Not really. Maybe a little.

"When was the last time you talked to him?"

Maybe a lot.

"A rotation ago?"

"A full year?"

"More or less." More. He knows the exact number of days.

He opens his eyes, looks down at his left hand. His knuckles are still bloody but already scabbing over. They will be healed by tomorrow, he knows. The Force doesn't like to let him feel human for too long.

"Why did you stop talking?" Leia asks and there is something eerily gentle in her voice now. She can feel his emotions too. Luke forgets that sometimes. "You had the same goal, didn't you?"

"We differed in how we wanted to achieve it," Luke says. Not a lie. Not really. Leia titles her head at him. She has that look in her eyes, the same way she looked at him when she found him pulling their father's caved-in mask out of the ashes of his pyre.

"And yet you got your knuckles bloody today," she says and Luke doesn't know how to counter that.

[fiftyshadesgrl]

I almost do part 5

If you're new to this series my masterlist is here!

Part 4 here!

Part 5

Me and Luke finished breakfast around 9:45, jason had left the diner way before that. His presence had shook me all the way to my core. I wasn't really prepared to head to the garage and work with him all day but Luke's words rang in my mind. 'It is your responsibility now. Am I right?'

I hated to admit it but he was right, my dad worked very hard to get the garage to where it was now and I would be letting him down if I didn't do my part. Me and Luke walked the short distance to the garage, I spotted jason just inside one of the doors already working on one vehicle. Luke grabbed my hand the moment he spotted jason, he walked us toward the open bay door and cleared his throat.

Jason's head snapped up and smiled when his eyes landed on me. "There you are! To be honest I didn't think you actually show up." He said standing, pulling a rag from his back pocket and wiping his grease covered hands. "Chuck is waiting for you in the office." I nodded and turned towards the office door. I'm guessing Luke was trying to follow me when I heard jason speak up, "woah hot shot, I need you out here working with me and Chuck. We have a full schedule today and need all hands on deck."

I snickered when I heard Luke hesitantly agree, I don't think I have ever seen him work on a car. When I got in the office Chuck was on the phone fiddling through some papers. "Yes sir, we are fully booked for the next week or so but we can try to work you in tomorrow evening around 3." He held up one finger and I nodded and placed my wallet on the desk beside the picture of my dad and me beside the old road runner he rebuilt. His smile was so big as he held me upon his shoulder. A wave of home sickness washed over me as all the memories of the past came flooding back. "Kiddo? You still with me?" I turned quickly to where Chuck was standing behind the desk.

"Yeah sorry, it's just....being here again." I said wiping a stray tear from my cheek.

He nodded, "I know kiddo, but your dad would be so proud of you for helping us. You really are a life saver."

"Dont mention it." I waved his last statement off. "You just go out there and do what you do best. I'll take care of everything here." He patted me on the shoulder and then left the office.

In between phone calls and checking peoples cars in I got the entire office organized and all the files reorganized and put back in their right place. I worked right through lunch and if I'm not mistaken so did the boys. I hadn't seen them all day due to being so bust in the office but around 5:30 jason walked into the office.

"What a day huh?" He said leaning against the doorframe wiping his hands once again with the rag from his back pocket.

I nodded, "yeah, but I'm sure yalls was more stressful than mine. You guys done?" I had to turn away from him because that look in his eyes made my heart skip a beat.

"Just finished the last one about five minutes ago." He glanced behind him then made his way into the office and shut the door. "I know we were supposed to talk this evening."

"Jason, I think we both know talking isn't going to change anything." My voice no more than a whisper as I stood from my chair behind the desk turning the laptop off.

"Y/n, please. Just give me a chance to explain some things to you." He stepped closer to me we were a foot apart and I could feel his warm breath fan across my face, smell the oil and grease mixed with his manly scent. I closed my eyes as my heart began to race. I felt his finger run across my cheek down to my chin, lifting my head up so I would look into his eyes. "I miss you." He whispered and leaned down a fraction.

I was prepared for the kiss that was surely coming, not about to stop it. Those three words he just spoke is something I have been dreaming of him saying to me along with another three word sentence. The sure to be kiss was interrupted by the sound of the office door opening. I jumped back away from jason but he stood still. My eyes went wide as Luke's glared at me and then jason.

I felt a cold sweat break out on my forehead and upper lip, my stomach churned and I felt the bile rise in my throat. "Luke! Jason was just telling me how full you guys' day has been."

Luke raised an eyebrow, "uh-huh." He stood there his button up shirt covered in grease along with his jeans and some streaks on his face.

Jason turned towards Luke and clapped him on the shoulder. "I think this deserves a drink! What'd you say?"

"Oh no, jason we will probably just head back to the hotel." I say quickly but luke stepped up in front of me and smiled.

"A drink sounds great. Celebrate our BIG day."

"But luke-----" I try but he interrupts me.

"It would be rude to decline a generous offer like that. Besides, I deserve a night to unwind. Don't you think?" His eyes bore into mine, a threat behind his words that only I recognized. Jason glanced from Luke to me, his brow furrowed. Could he pick up on it?

I put on a fake smile, "of course honey." Swallowing the fear of remembering how he was when he would drink before. Hoping tonight would be different but somehow I highly doubt it.

"O-kay." Jason said, "does 8 sound good to you guys?" Me and Luke both nodded quickly as Luke kept glaring at me. "Luke, can you help me put up some of the tools we left out?" Chuck called from the garage, I watched as the muscle in his jaw twitch before he stepped out of the office leaving me and jason alone again.

"What the hell was that?" Jason asked as soon as Luke left the office.

"What?" I try to busy myself with moving papers around the desk until I felt Jason's hand on my arm, turning me towards him.

"That! Between you and Luke." He pointed with his thumb behind him in the direction where Luke went. "Something you're not telling me?"

"N-no, of course not." I stammered trying to look at anything but him.

"Y/n?" Jason whispered bringing my gaze to meet his. "What is it?"

I pulled free from his grasp, "Nothing. Even if there was something I sure wouldn't tell you. Don't pretend to care okay, it's cruel and it hurts." He began to say something but I made my way out of the office into the garage where Chuck and Luke were just finishing up. "You ready?" I ask Luke but Chuck spoke up first.

"Luke here was just telling me we are celebrating tonight." I nod as I feel Jason's presence behind me. "Y/n do you mind to lock up? I need these two to move a car to the back for scrap."

I smiled warmly, "sure chuck."

"Ill meet you guys outside, I got to use the restroom." Luke said before jason and Chuck left. I began pulling the bay doors down making sure they were locked, I turned and ran straight into Luke.

"Shit! You scared me honey." Putting my hand on my chest trying to calm myself.

"You should be scared, don't think I didnt catch that shit in the office today." He growled, backing me up farther into the garage. "From the moment he walked into that diner I knew there was something between you two."

"W-what are you talking a-about?"

"Dont try to pull that shit on me." Luke's hand wrapped around my neck.

"Luke, please." I rasped, pawing at his hand.

"You think I'm stupid? I've read your journal from when you were younger. I know who this guy is and what you two had before. You still have feelings for him don't you?" When I didn't answer he shook me hard to where my teeth chattered. I shook my shead frantically, feeling the tears fall down my cheeks. "Bullshit, I see the way you two look at each other when the other isn't looking. You fucking him?"

"No! I swear! Please Luke dont-" I tried to reason with him but it was useless. He backed me up against one of the tables that held different kinds of wrenches and parts.

"Dont lie to me!" His grip tightened almost cutting off my air completely.

I gasped, feeling the pressure behind my eyes that usually happens when you strain to hard. "Im....not!" My words were barely heard.

"You, are, mine. You think I'm about to let you leave me and make a fool out of me? Have everyone talk about how I lost my fiance to a no good redneck who changes tires for a living. I will kill you before I let that happen, and you know I will." He shoved me backwards, a loud clang rang out as the wreches fell from the table onto the concrete floor as I collided with it.

My back screamed as the sharp pain ran across my lower back. Then another pain on my right arm as I fell and hit the ground. A yelp escaped from my lips as I lay on the ground holding my back. I felt the warm wetness on my arm but that was nothing to the way my back was screaming in pain.

Luke kneeled down next to me and whispered, "why do you make me do this to you? You know how I am." Tears rolled down the sides of my face as I whimpered in pain on the ground, Luke's eyes ice cold staring at me. "Go clean yourself up in the bathroom. Not a word of this to anyone or itll be worse next time."

He left I'm guessing going to help jason and Chuck. I'm sure they didn't hear a thing due to them being on the other side of the building but I couldn't help but wishing that they did. I laid there another minute or two then slowly made my way to the bathroom. My legs shook from the pain in my back, almost buckling from it. I turned the faucet on, the water stung as it ran over the large gash in my arm.

As I left it under the water I searched the medicine cabinet for something to close the gash with. I heard the garage door open and footsteps quickly making their way towards me.

"Y/n!? Where are you?" The tears running down my face now were from hearing Jason's voice.

"Im- uh- in the bathroom." My voice shook.

He appeared in the doorway a second later, wore in his eyes. "Luke said you tripped over the air hose." I closed my eyes, of course he made an excuse for what happened. I wanted to tell jason everything but I remembered Luke's threat and how I knew he would follow through with it. Jason must have seen the tears on my face because he stepped closer.

"Hey, you okay?" His hands reached out towards me but I pulled away slightly.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just hit my back pretty hard and cut my arm. Do we still have those butterfly bandages?"

He grabbed my arm and turned it to where he could see the gash. "Fuck y/n, this is gonna need stitches. You need to go to the hospital." He grabbed a clean washcloth from the shelf behind the toilet and placed it on the gash before using the medical tape to wrap around it to hold it in place. "Let me look at your back."

I tried to turn away from him but he wasn't having it. He pulled my shirt up in the back, a shiver ran through me as I felt his fingers gently touch the place where I'm sure there was a bruise forming.

"Damn, you must have hit pretty hard there's going to be a huge bruise there tomorrow. You need to get it checked out too." His hand lingered on my back longer than it should have but I didnt make any movement or statement to make him pull away.

"Jason." I breathed out not knowing if I was asking him for something or trying to tell him what really happened. I turned towards him, his hand moving from my back to my waist. His eyes burned with intensity and I'm sure mine did but only for a moment until reality came back and slap me in the face. "I'm fine, but thank you."

We both heard the door open in the back of the garage and I made a quick move past jason heading into the garage. Chuck and Luke walking towards me and jason. I knew he was there because I could sense him.

Chuck surveyed the floor and all the wrenches and parts scattered all over the place. "I'm sorry I made such a mess. That hose came out of nowhere." I said as I looked at Luke a new anger boiling inside me.

"That's where you fell?" Jason's voice sounded from behind me, he was staring at the blood on the concrete in front of the table. I nodded and he spoke again. "You said you tripped over the air hose?" Somehow I knew that Jason was questioning whether that was what really happened.

A little shake of Luke's head and the look in his eyes made me stick to the story. "Yeah, I already told you that."

Before anyone could say anything luke chose that moment to ask, "how bad is your arm?"

Before I could answer jason said ,"she needs stitches. Her back needs to be looked at too."

"Well then let's go back to the hotel and get our car." Luke motioned for me to come with him.

"Here take mine. Jason can drop me off at home." Chuck handed Luke the keys and began cleaning up the wrenches on the floor.

"Thanks Chuckie. I owe you one." Luke smiled but didn't catch chucks grimace at the nickname. "Come on honey." We made our way out the door, I glanced back once and saw jason staring after me his fists balled up at his sides, anger was written all over his face.

Luke opened the door for me and helped me into chucks truck. "Well done." Luke whispered before he shut the door, he gave a small wave to Chuck and Jason before he climbed in and started the engine. I leaned my head against the window as we pulled out and I instructed Luke on how to get to the hospital.

@missamberv @an-unhealthy-obsession @vicmc624 @tftumblin @justanotherwinchester @jesseswartzwelder @holylulusworld @fangirl199812 @emerloveskate

[in-superbloom]

did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen? (a.i.)

right where you left me: prologue

pairing: ashton irwin x olivia jones (oc)

warnings: uhh a kinda grieving theme i guess? but no deaths. it has a sad tone overall, but nothing major (in this chapter hehe). foul language because i can't help myself. the tiniest mention of alcohol, but as a memory. think i should probably warn you that this contains a very sad ash. also not much dialogues. this is mainly for explanation and introduction, but very important for the story. if you find anything else that might be triggering, please let me know so i can add it here !!

author's note: oof okay. so. this is the prologue of a series very very dear to my heart that i've been working on for what it feels like my whole life but really it's been just a few months. but i'm in love with the story (which rarely happens with my own writing) so i hope you can enjoy it too !! this is also my very first time posting a fic since 2013 so pls keep that in mind <3 no i am not shaking as type this ofc not also: although i have the full story ready in my head, this is the only chapter that's written. i wanted to wait until i had at least a few ready before posting this but i'm too anxious for that lmao just saying this bc it will take a good while until i have any more chapters, so <3 (p.s.: i went over this thing a million times since may so if you find any errors pls look away, i'm not fixing this thing anymore. thanks <3)

another note: anna from the future here to say that i completely forgot about the playlist i made for the story lmao here it is in case you're interested k thanks bye <3

credits: title is from taylor swift's song right where you left me. model in the picture: paola locatelli. banner by me.

i also wanted to take a minute to thank some really nice friends that i've made here over these past few months & that i'm extremely grateful for @wastelandcth @suchalonelysunflower @littledrummerangie i cannot thank you babes enough for inspiring me the way that you do & for letting me yell about this to you && for encouraging me so much 🥺 i'll never be able to explain just how much this means to me, so i'll have to settle for saying thank you at any change that i can get <3 i love you all 💜 also gem my baby, thank you for the inspo with the banner 💚

@bluesdelis look babe i did it 😌 you know how grateful i am for you & for you letting me have a breakdown every week about my writing for the past 8 years so let's not dive into that or else i will write something bigger than this prologue jsjsjdjd love you 🖤

i hope you all have a good reading and a nice day ♡

let me know what are your thoughts about the fic ! ♡

word count: 4.1k

☆☆☆

Cold. That was the first thing that Olivia’s brain processed.

Still with her eyes closed, she buried herself more into the duvet, while her arm blindly reached for the furnace in human form that she calls boyfriend. However, as soon as her arm was only met with cold sheets, her eyes shot open.

Blinking the sleep away, she sat up on the bed, searching for the infamous red clock resting on Ashton’s bedside table that was supposed to look like a vintage alarm clock. Olivia had ordered it online at an auction website a couple of years back, as a gift for his 23rd birthday, since it was something he had mentioned multiple times prior that he was looking for, but still hadn't found. But when it finally came in (two weeks after the due date), it looked nothing like the picture she saw on the website. Feeling beyond frustrated, she wanted to send it back immediately and ask for a refund and maybe leave a not so polite review on the seller's page. But Ashton stopped her right away, laughing like the situation was absolutely hilarious to him, while saying, 'I like it, it’s quirky'. So, the clock stayed and found a home right next to him in their room.

Some days, however, she would wake up at some ungodly hour because of the blaring noise of the only ringtone the clock had. But whatever annoyance she could feel towards the object, it always vanished as soon as she felt Ashton's lips gently touching her face in a good morning kiss before he would get up to start his day, leaving her to catch some more hours of well deserved sleep.

As the furthest from a morning person as a touring musician could possibly be, Olivia had always feared that living under the same roof as Ashton would turn her into an early bird like him, but she's thankful that it never happened (not that he needs to know about that).

When she sees the red clock, she smiles at the sudden but welcome memories of them flooding her foggy brain, but frowns slightly when she realizes it reads 12:13 pm. Ashton rarely lets her sleep past 10 am.

Gathering all her strength and will, she rises up from the bed, smoothly picking up a grey wool sweatshirt from the chair (way too baggy on her slim body, but it smells like him), pulling it over her head and relishing on the soft material warming up her body. Making her way to the door and calmly going down the stairs, she can’t help but stop for a minute to admire the picture frames on their walls, one in particular catches her attention – probably one of the most prized pictures and memories they had. It felt older than it actually is, but it was around 4 years ago, she's sure – a little while after the two of them met. The picture was of their group of friends that still remains the same: Ashton and his best friend, Luke; Olivia, her best friend, Calum and their old hometown friend, turned into Calum’s new friend at college, turned into everyone’s friend, Michael; and her then newly band members, Suki, Eli and Ravi. Together, their group was the life of the party through all their college years, and it showed by the big smiles and drinks in hands they all had in the picture. It was a very special night, the first time Olivia’s little band played for the public – for a small audience sure, but it was a wonderful night nonetheless. What a long road it had been since that night.

Her nostalgic thoughts were interrupted by a shiver that went through her whole body, and it made her realize how oddly cold the whole house was, not only their bedroom. Which, granted, it was November in New York and the weather was just getting colder, but that’s exactly why Ashton always made sure to keep the house warm enough. As much as she loved the chilly season, the warm weather always reminded him of his hometown, and who was she to deny him that?

The smell of fresh made coffee could be sensed even before she reached the kitchen. Arriving there, the curly haired woman still found no signs of her boyfriend, so she went straight after the coffee maker pot sitting on the far left corner of the cream marble counter. Smiling softly at the tons of memories of Ashton's sleepy figure making their favorite beverage, she reached for a coffee mug on the cupboard on top of the counter and poured the remainder of the hot liquid on it (it's her favorite mug, if she must choose – it was a gift from a fan, and it had printed on it a collage of the pictures of her and Ashton that were posted on social media through their first year of relationship).

Moving to the glass doors that lead to the mini garden they cultivate, she didn't have to open them to spot the 6-feet-tall man sitting on a bench outside, looking oddly small in his oversized clothes, coffee mug tightly held between strong hands. Something about his figure made Olivia frown, however: he was staring with an unwavering look at her small but eye-catching pot of yellow daffodils that were almost as much of a pet to them as Stitch at this point. Sensing that there’s something definitely off about his semblance, she made a mental note to talk to him and find out what’s wrong later. So she goes back to the kitchen, knowing that he might need this quiet and private moment for himself.

She lost count of the minutes that went by (couldn't have been more than five) before she hears the garden's door opening and closing, and then his bare feet are dragging his brawny body to her. Except, he goes over to the sink, walking right through her, not showing any sign that he even saw her hunched figure over the counter table in the middle of the room.

Alright, someone's in a mood.

Olivia tries to swallow the annoyance already bubbling inside her – he knows how much she hates to be ignored, no matter how mad he might be – by trying to think of what she can say that won't piss him off. This is always a hard feat to accomplish when Ashton gets in these moods, but there’s a reason for them to work so well together.

“I missed my favorite body heater when I woke up,” she says in her best sweet voice, knowing how quickly his resolve crumbles when he hears that voice.

Still, no reaction.

That settles a worry at the pit of her stomach, because Ashton is never like this. Even when he's not in the mood to talk, he always gives some kind of reaction to her words; it doesn't matter how small, just enough to make her feel acknowledged.

When he's finished washing his mug and the few scattered dishes across the sink – she noticed that he already had lunch, if the lone plate in the drying rack is anything to go by –, he dries his hand in a towel, turns around and throws it on top of the same counter Olivia was leaning up against. Once again, he walks away not even sparing her a look.

Indignant, she leaves the now empty coffee mug on top of the table and follows him as he walks up the stairs, any determination to not aggravate his mood now well gone.

“Hey! In case you didn't notice, I'm right here. Whatever got you in this sour mood, I'm certainly not to blame, so can you stop being a child now and talk to me?!”

Ashton just keeps walking – more like sluggishly dragging his body – until he reaches their bedroom and suddenly stops just merely two feet inside the room, looking around with vacant eyes; like he was expecting to see something that wasn't there.

“Okay, that's really mature of you. Are you planning on ignoring me all day then?” Olivia questions exasperated, staring angrily at the back of his neck, where the condor tattoo lives – her favorite of his, but that sight doesn't bring her any peace today like it usually does.

Her glare only breaks when she hears the familiar sound of dog tags swaying on her right side. Shifting her gaze to the direction of the sound, Olivia notices Stitch, their small, black & white French bulldog – who she thought was outside in the garden – slowly trudging his way from around the bed until he stops at Ashton's feet, looking up at one of his humans with sad eyes. That realization only makes the worry in her stomach grow uncomfortably.

“Hi buddy,” Ashton's voice cracks a bit from the lack of use, but he smiles softly at the sweet dog, and crouches down to pet him.

Olivia can't help but gasp as she notices three things all at once that leave her overwhelmed: first, how she didn't even notice Stitch was in the room when she woke up – which never ever happens, in fact, most days he wakes her up whenever he deems her bedtime as finished and can't ever contain his excitement when she finally gets up; second, how the windows blinds are closed, which, again, rarely occurs under their roof, not if Ashton can help it. And third, how sad and melancholic the whole scene in front of her is – how sad and melancholic Ashton is. Pointless to say by now – that's also a very rare occasion.

A chill creeps up Olivia's spine, putting her body into high alert and also serving as a reminder of how everything looks out of place today. Trying to keep her head from spiraling down way too soon, she wraps her arms around herself and crouches down beside her two favorite boys, trying once more.

“Ash? Can you hear me?” even with her throat closing, she softly asks, purposefully putting her face in Ashton's point of view. Her only answer is the low whispers he's letting out to Stitch, while cradling the tiny dog in his arms, spreading gentle kisses on his head.

“I know, bud, I know. I miss her too,” is the only whisper she could understand and immediately wishes she hadn't. The weak wail that comes from Stitch's throat seems to fit perfectly with how the three of them feel.

Ashton then looks up and for a couple of seconds, and Olivia can swear he’s staring right into her eyes. But when he shows no reaction, she knows he’s just staring ahead and not at her, with that look that says there’s too much going on inside his head. She feels the urge to embrace him and get him to talk about whatever is on his mind, so they can share that weight like they always do, but when Ashton gets up from the ground and settles on the bed with Stitch, Olivia can physically feel the crack in her heart caused by the feeling she’s left with.

While Ashton is pulling the duvet over him and the dog, with clearly no intentions of getting up anytime soon, Olivia stands up on her feet with a new-found determination – she needs to figure out what the hell is going on.

This nightmare had to be just that, right? Nothing but a very vivid dream – she's had those before. Scary sure, but they always go away, and soon enough she's back into Ashton's arms, with Stitch jumping on the bed ready to lick their faces off. She just needs to wake herself up from whatever fucked up dream this is – right?

She's running down the stairs this time, frantically in search of something, of what exactly, she doesn’t know – but she knows she needs an answer. The more she looks for something, the more desperate she gets, not knowing what to look for. Then suddenly, something catches her eyes.

The white and blue calendar that's held up by magnets on the side of the fridge. She knows their calendar is red and yellow. They got it from their favorite flower market. Slowly, as if scared of what it might be there – “It's just a calendar, for fucks sake” – she approaches the damn thing. Upon inspection, she deems it as a normal calendar – she really doesn't know what she was expecting – until.

She knows what's wrong with it now.

It's November. She knows it, because the Asian and last leg of her first world tour is about to begin November 21st, eleven days from today. Right after Mike's birthday, she knows this.

Then why does the calendar say today is January 14th?

☆ ☆ ☆

Ashton woke up with a jolt. He quickly sat up, frightening the little Frenchie that was asleep right next to him on the bed. Trying to make sense of his surroundings, he roughly rubbed his face to get some sleep off of it and soon reached for the dog that was staring at him with sleepy but sad eyes. Ashton is sure Stitch understands far more than a dog is supposed to understand about their current situation.

The room is covered in shadows, almost pitch black, but he can see the sunlight even through the thick dark grey blinds covering up the windows. Ashton knows he won't be able to sleep again at that moment, so he gets up from the bed – much slower than he used to. His heartbeat is still out of control because of the nightmare that woke him up, but he can't bother to pay attention to it when Stitch is softly wailing beside him. Ashton lets out a ghost of a smile when the dog rests his head on his right upper thigh, looking up at him with an expression Ashton knows all too well.

“C'mon you little ravenous creature, let's feed you,” the bulldog excitedly jumps to the ground, already running his way down the stairs, not even waiting for Ashton to get up.

That gets a real smile out of him, but it vanishes as soon as he glances at the alarm clock on his bedside table. It reads 5:13 am, nothing out of the ordinary for him. But that small and inoffensive clock, with its red paint peeling off, holds a lot of memories for him. Memories that two months ago would bring joy to his heart, but now he almost wants to throw the object across the room.

It was a stupid thing, really. He had been wanting a vintage alarm clock and Olivia got one for his birthday. But the product they received was definitely not the one she bought, and if he's being honest, he didn't like it as much as he made out to. But seeing her so excited in the weeks before it arrived, and how disappointed she was when it did, he couldn't help but try his best to make her smile that luminous smile again. It's part of his nature by now.

That's also the reason why he lets her think that he doesn't notice when she wakes up at some ungodly hour (her words, not his) along with him, because of the annoying and only sound the alarm clock is able to produce. He always leaves soft kisses in every inch of bare skin he can find on her sleeping figure, so she goes back to the dream land and doesn't wake up before 10 am. No one wants to deal with that kind of bad humor, not even him.

As much as he likes being a morning person and absolutely enjoys her company in the mornings, he knows she'll take any and every extra hour of sleep she can get before starting the day. And that's why he loves that she's so stubborn that his early bird tendencies never got to her – he knows she feared that this would happen when they moved in together, but he met her like this, fell for her like this. He wouldn't change a single thing about her.

Ashton drags himself out of the bed, wincing slightly at how cold the wooden floors are under his bare feet. He doesn't bother putting some socks on, or a sweater – the cold weather in the house is uncharacteristically comforting to him. Nothing feels warm without her anyway.

While descending the stairs, he mentally curses himself for not being strong enough to look past the picture frames on the wall. One in particular catches his eyes – a picture from the night of Olivia's first concert with her band. The memories of that night are still painfully vivid in his mind: the laughter among their group that eventually infected everyone at the pub, Suki and Luke's first kiss and the silly smile that didn't leave his best friend's face all night, the standing ovation Olivia got after her three-songs set, and her captivating and breathtaking smile that made him realize right then and there, while watching her sway to the music, that he was definitely falling in love with her and there was nothing he could do to stop it – not that he wanted to.

So many memories held up on that wall, in the relatively short time since they met, that he can't help but wonder if that's all they'll get in this lifetime.

Ashton is abruptly taken out of his thoughts by Stitch's barks coming from the bottom of the stairs. He quickly jogs down the few steps left and goes straight after the dog's food in the kitchen's cabinet. After Stitch starts to happily devour his breakfast, Ashton goes to make his coffee, doing enough for two people like he always does, since Calum drops by most days for a chat or to drop Duke before going to work. Although all three of them know he just can't bother to make food for himself in the morning, while Ashton is the group's elected chef. Ashton always says he just needs a boyfriend – Olivia says Calum already has one who makes him breakfast every day.

He grabs an apple from the fridge and makes his way outside to their garden. Even though a lot of their memories took place there, the garden is the only space in the house where he doesn't feel like suffocating all the time. At least here, he can breathe some fresh air and look at the sky when he's feeling overwhelmed – which is basically all he's been doing for about a month now.

Yet, a lot of the garden has Olivia's name written all over.

He remembers vividly the day she came home after spending two weeks in LA doing some pocket shows, with a pack of daffodil seeds and the largest smile. She excitedly told him that a friend gifted it to her when she mentioned the little garden they were planning to build together at their new house. The friend told Olivia that daffodils symbolize rebirth and new beginnings, so as the good lover of symbolism that she is, Olivia loved the idea of having those flowers to symbolize their new beginning.

Ashton, on the other hand, wasn't a fan of the flowers at first – he just didn't see the appeal to them. But nonetheless, he indulged her, letting Olivia plant the seeds near the bench they used to sit during the quiet and unrushed afternoons, so they could admire the sunset, and she could happily look at the daffodils.

Pointless to say – the damn flowers grew on him.

Now, however, looking at them without Olivia and her contagious joy next to him, they were back to be as dull as they were before, if not more so.

Still lost inside his head without any sense of how much time went by since he sat down, Ashton doesn't hear the front door closing, and doesn't notice that he's no longer the only person inside the house until someone sits next to him on the bench. Yet, he doesn't show any sign of acknowledgement to them.

A few minutes go by before either of them speaks up.

“Luke said you didn't go to see her yesterday,” Calum starts softly, not wanting to disturb the calmness of the morning.

Ashton takes a few seconds to respond, “No point in doing that.” The black haired man licks his lips while thinking carefully about his next words.

“You know staying inside this house all day by yourself won't help either,” Calum turns his head to his left and takes a good look at Ashton's uncharacteristically hunched over figure, and immediately thinks that anyone can tell this man is not himself anymore. His second thought is that Olivia would hate seeing him like this.

“And what exactly do you expect me to do? Move on with my life like nothing happened? Like I'm not slowly and painfully losing the love of my life? Just because it’s easy for you doesn't mean it's easy for me.”

Calum closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He knows Ashton doesn't mean it, it's the anger and frustration talking. He knows it. Doesn't make it sting any less.

“I'm not telling you to move on with your life, because that's far from what I'm doing, and I certainly don't expect you to do it. I'm just saying you need to occupy your mind or else–”

“I'll go insane? Think it's a bit too late for that,” Ashton interrupts with a bitter tone that doesn't belong to his usual chirpy voice.

“You know it's not,” Calum sighs and drinks the rest of his coffee, moving his body slightly, so he's facing the blonde man, “I got a job interview for you at that school you talked about so much last summer, the principal said you can go any day this week. I went ahead and sent her your resume as well as explained everything that she needs to know about Olivia, so you don't have to. You just gotta put on some decent clothes and show up.” he sees Ashton's face softening a little and takes it as a victory. A few beats go by and then, “Maybe take a shower too. That's gonna make you feel better.” Calum leans in closer to his friend's personal space and takes a sniff, causing Ashton to deflect from him slightly, but not to push him away – another small win.

“Definitely take a shower, you stink. When was the last time your hair saw shampoo?”

“Fuck off,” is Ashton's only reply to the younger man's inquest. But Calum can see a smile creeping up on the blonde's face, which brings out a smile of his own.

“I'll send you all the details later today,” he checks the hour on the watch on his wrist and gets up, “Just please, Ash, go. I can't lose you too.”

Calum gently lays a hand on Ashton's shoulder and squeezes a little. The man doesn't look up, but gives a curt nod to his friend, who's satisfied enough. Calum stops on the threshold of the garden glass doors to give some kisses to Stitch – who came to make Ashton company as soon as he finished his food –, and then he puts the coffee mug on the dishwater. And soon enough, he's on his way out of the door. But not before snatching a tangerine from the fridge.

Ashton is left by himself once again. As he hears the sound of the front door closing, he thinks that this might be his life from now on. Just him and Stitch, trying their hardest to make it through another miserable day without the love of their lives. While everyone else comes by just to make sure he's still breathing. Breathing, maybe, but alive?

Swallowing the tears, he looks up at the sky. It's a deep, beautiful mix of orange, pink and blue, but he knows that it won't last long and soon the rain will be pouring down. He thinks about how much Olivia loves the rain.

God, he needs to pull himself together. She would hate to see him like this. Maybe he should take Calum's offer after all, he really needs to occupy his mind.

Making a mental note to thank Calum later, and also to apologize for how rude he was to him this morning, Ashton slowly gets up from the bench to put his mug on the sink and makes his way to the living room, with the small dog loyally following his every step. He puts on some cartoon that for once doesn't remind him of her (she always lovingly made fun of him for still watching those) and cuddles with Stitch on the couch. He can take a shower later.

Not half an hour goes by, he falls asleep and has a good dream for a change. He dreams of the days he spent with Olivia in the Philippines last February, right before her first world tour started. Some of the most magical days of their lives – surrounded by delicious food, a whole new culture to learn about and the warmth of the sun. Infinite counted days full of love and passion, where they were the only people in the world.

Even his subconscious knows to hold on to that brief moment of happiness, because he might never live that again.

[unlikelyempathpruneauthor]

Lovers at last

Calum Hood x Reader

summary: after years of being friends and even a band mate of the guys, you grow up and experience something you never thought you would.

a/n: this was definitely something from like 3 in the morning so hopefully you all enjoy. also this is during like youngblood era for those who like the timeframes. there are also some typos but i mean it’s okay lol adds on to the effect.

You and the boys have been together as friends since middle school, it was always the 5 of you, when the guys were creating the band and posting videos on youtube you helped them figure that part out and being the technical bandmate, especially when it came to social media. However as time moved along the boys were getting big and had gotten their own team, you didn't take this as a bad thing, it was good they were getting noticed and having their music heard. Even if they were away you were still a part of the band, it didn't matter if it was official or not, you were a part of the band.

You on the other hand, had gotten yourself in the music industry and started as an intern producer for a record label and making tunes for some starting bands. Your talent in creating these tunes eventually brought all types of artists from around the world to work with you. You later got into writing lyrics and started writing music for other artists. Of course this went around pretty fast getting attention from many artists. You had told the guys about this way before you started, they were all sure you were going to make it big as well. In the younger years you had helped the band before with lyrics and tunes or chords. Helping them find their sound.

Skip forward to knowing you were currently texting with Cal as he and the guys were on tour, while you were meeting or well about to meet the one and only Ariana Grande who needed to find some new sounds for her new album. Before meeting with her you were freaking out and needed someone to talk to and that's where this story leads us.

Meeting ariana grande was one of the things you have always dreamed of, of course when you were contacted for some help with producing you thought it was a joke because who would send an email saying they are ariana grande and would like to work with you on their album, that just doesn't happen, but in this case it did for you. You had everything prepared for her to give a listen to and let her decide on what changes needed to be made and for her to just be comfortable with the new samples you made for her.

Talking to her in text was something you were good at but now you were officially meeting her and getting her full opinion about the stuff you made. It was about an hour of you showing her all the stuff you came up with and she was just so fascinated with what you came up with. To be honest you were unsure what she wanted so you made a lot, and I mean a lot of material, so you were prepared for anything that she might need.

“These samples are crazy good! I've been trying to find a new sound and these three simple songs need these sounds, this is really amazing.” she said as you nodded being glad you were able to find her sound, “well i'm glad you like them, im happy to help, it's an honor really.” you said as she shook her head, “i should be saying that about you, you have crazy talent for this. Have you considered moving to LA?” she asked as you shrugged, “maybe one day, i'm not sure yet, i don't know if you know but i'm friends with 5 seconds of summer,” you said as she gasped and nodded, “oh yeah i've heard of them, but what do they have to do with you moving to LA?” she asked as you continued, “Well we grew up together here and i don't know i wouldn't want to leave them and the place where we all grew up.” you said as she nodded completely understanding, “yeah it's tough, but if they are your friends i feel like they would understand because they are growing, it wouldn't hurt for them seeing you grow too.” she said quite simply and honestly as you nodded taking that advice to heart.

You knew that maybe just one day you would move your career somewhere else, but you just didn't want to leave home. Yeah they leave you while on your but they always come back, even if it's just for a while, they come back. A part of you wanted to go to LA and pursue your dreams there, but your home was here. You didn't want to leave the place where you grew up. Of course this needed to be talked with. Not just your parents, but with cal and the guys.

…

Weeks later the guys had all come home and you sent them all a message that you needed to talk to them all together. The guys were slightly confused but they wanted to see you anyway so they all agreed.As you were in the old garage where they used to rehearse you were more nervous that you thought you were. You had made the final decisions and you were moving to LA, you had signed off with a good company and you were officially to move away from home. Everything was done, you just needed to tell the guys.They all walked in as they all saw you sitting down with a very serious face and began to worry.

“hey guys.” you said as they all smiled at you and gave you a hug as you looked at all of them and worried how they were going to react. “So why did you bring us all here?” Michael asked partly worried as the rest followed you to sit down, “Well i have some news i needed to share, and well you were on tour and i couldn't interrupt that.” you said as ash shook his head, “y/n, you know we're here for you no matter what, even if we are on tour.” Ash said as you smiled for his compassion, “what is it dovey?” cal asked probably the most worried out of all of the group. He was scared of what was going on and was prepared for any news that could change your life and his plans of telling you how he felt about you. To be frank he had always beat himself up for it whenever the days passed and he didn't tell you about his feelings, he was close to telling you, but with this news he might just tell you now. You two were close and you met cal first way before the guys, so it would be understable if you and cal needed some privacy with what you were about to say.

“Well, you remember when I met Ariana Grande and did some samples for her album?” you asked as they all nodded and luke spoke, “yeah those were amazing by the way, were sorry we couldn't be there to celebrate.” he said as you shook your head softly with a small smile, “its okay, i know you guys were out celebrating out there,” you said with a giggle as they all joined in, “Well we talk about uh.. about moving to LA and i've been considering it, but at first i didn't want to decide alone because well i didn't want to leave home but uh, what i'm trying to say is that basically..” you said pausing as cal spoke, “you're moving to LA.” he said as you looked at him with a sorry look and nodded looking at the rest of the guys. There was a slight pause but that was because the guys were processing this whole situation, you were moving away and that was okay as long as you were happy.

“Im sorry, if this is gonna ruin our friendship, but i feel like i need to go there. Things are good here, but LA is where I can grow and become better.” you said as they all shook their heads, “don’t apologize y/n, how many times have we left you? You didn't stop us, you empowered us to keep our heads up which is what we will do for you.” Ash said as Michael nodded, “as much as it hurts seeing you leave, we know they need you over there, our friendship isn't over, in fact it will grow. We might even create music together.” he said as you smiled and looked over at luke, “it's not the end is all i know, it's a beginning for all of us. I mean who knows we might all be in LA soon, so you won't be alone. We're here for you y/n we always will be. '' he said as you looked over at Calum who had a sad look, but he was happy deep down inside, but he couldn't believe that even more distance would separate you two.

“Cal?” you asked as he looked at you in a certain way and you looked at the guys to give you two some personal space and they nodded and left. You took one look at Cal and knew something was wrong the minute you spoke about LA. For you two him leaving was enough distance between you two, now he knew what you felt when he was leaving, but this time you were leaving for good.

“What's wrong cal?” you asked as he looked at you, this was his time he knew it, it was time despite the bad timing, “this is probably bad timing, but... i love you, i've always been in love with you.” he said as you looked at him in seriousness. You didn't know if this was him wanting you to stay or if these were his true feelings, but you felt your heart beating faster and felt it get warm as your eyes were on him.

“Wait what?” you asked as he looked over at you, “i'm in love with you dovey, always have been. I'm not telling you this to make you stay, I just needed you to know is all.. I just need you to know before you leave,” he said as you looked at him and your eye contact was firm, “what..what do you mean years?” you asked as he grabbed your hands and you didn't pull away. He knew this was a sign, “since we first met there was something about you that just pulled me in, it was everything about you, there wasn't one bad thing about you, i just can't stand keeping it in, i need you more than just a friend.” he said as you were nervous with what you were about to say next, “cal.. I'm in love with you too.” you said in a whisper as he looked up quickly hoping he had heard you right.

“You- really?” he said as you pulled him in for a kiss. Your lips had connected in need for one another's touch after years of thinking one another saw each other as friends. This moment that the both of you had dreamed of was happening. His hands were all over your waist as they traveled up to your cheek and yours were on his jaw and hair. Once the kiss broke you both stared into one another's eyes and you smiled, “i love you.” you said again as cal smiled and took you in for a kiss once again and this was definitely the start of something new.

...

Moving to LA had its perks, mainly for your job, you had met new people and even helped out starter bands or singers with their career and sending them off with a great bang. You have also been working with big time singers and bands and helping them out with some new sound. You were given some new material and had even created some for a band that your boss said would be coming in and wanting some sort of new sound for their album. You wondered who they were not knowing what band it was. All you were told was that they were working on their 3rd album and needed some help.

As you waited for their arrival you texted Cal to see how he was doing. Ever since you two started dating, texting around the day and being near your phone as a must. He missed you dearly and you missed him, so the small messages around the day helped. He also came over from time to time, but not a whole lot.

You were quick to get into the room and you were shocked with who was in front of you. Cal was in front of you and you were quick to run over to him and hug him tight. You gave each other a small peck as you enjoyed one another's company, “what? How and when?” you said as you heard someone cough as you turned around and saw the 3 other boys standing in front of you. “What are you guys doing here?” you said with a smile as you hugged them all in a group hug, you sure missed them after not seeing them for a year. “Well we are here to work on our album, we heard there's an amazing producer here.” Michael spoke and it hit you with the realization that it was them you were working with. “Wait seriously, you want my help? But I thought you were in europe?” you said as luke nodded, “yeah we were there a couple days ago, but we need your help. The album is going great but we still need more sounds and samples.” he said as you nodded, “well okay i can help you with that, but are you sure you want my help?” you said as cal grabbed your waist pulling you closer to him as the boys nodded, “yes we need your help, you know us better than anyone, and well you are the best in LA,” ash said as you smiled, “okay yeah i'll help.” you said looking at everyone and over at cal with a smile.

Before working you all hung out for a while and to also see the vibe they were wanting to find. You were just over the moon that they were here, you had missed them so much and just needed to see your friends again and of course your boyfriend. You were looking through lots of new material the whole day just to see what they like and seeing if you could place it all together and get them something they want so they can start with recording.

“These samples are all good, you could make something with that, but just, we want it simple yet complex.” Michael said as you nodded, “yeah for sure, I should have some stuff in here,” you said as Luke nodded, “yeah also if you want to, we have the lyrics set for these songs,” he said as he handed you the files with the lyrics. The songs titles in here were moving along, more, monsters among men, and one that was titled valentine but that one had no lyrics, “this one doesn't have lyrics? You're making a song about valentines day?” you said pointing it out as ash nodded, “well yeah, it's in a couple days and we were all thinking about how many people were going to make a song and release it as well, we want to make our own version of mariah carey’s all i want for christmas but with valentine's day.” he explained as you nodded. You then walked over to the computer remembering these two samples that were perfect for this song, “that's funny because i have this sample, well i have two actually,” you said clicking through and finding them both and laying them out in repeat as the boys all stood behind you watching you do your thing.

“Okay the first one is just a, “dum, dum, dum, dum, um.” over and over, and the second one is just, “valentine,” over and over again as well, but if you were to place it on top of one antoher..you get this.” you said as they all gave it a hear and it was so uncanny but perfect, the lyrics were already flowing in.

The guys were all happy with there they left things off leaving you to rest and of course spend time with cal. You two were walking out hand in hand into your car, you were heading over to the drivers side but he followed you and you looked up confused, “you wanna drive?” you asked as he took your keys and smiled, “yeah, i've got a surprise actually, so i was hoping we could make a stop there.” he said as you nodded, “okay cal..just don't kill me or anything.” you joked as you got on the other side of the car, “ dovey i would never kill you, i would probably kill for you though,” he said as you scrunch your nose and you had reached over for a kiss before leaving.

On your way there his hand was near yours, the most he missed about you was your touch and he just needed a part of you touching him making him feel safe. Ever since you left he had missed you dearly and well of course duke. You couldn't see duke as much which sucked, but you knew that you would see him soon whenever it was your turn to go to visit.

Once you made the stop, you were parked in front of a house, “who lives here?” you asked as he got out to open your side of the door and you two walked over to the front of the house as he held you in his arms hoping you could guess. “Well it's definitely someone,” he said as you frowned as you headed near the door, once the door was opened you saw duke run over to you as you kneeled down greeting the puppy and even picking him up missing the pup’s barks and kisses, you then looked inside the house. You had seen all of cal’s things and then it hit you. “You? You live here?” you said with a smile as he nodded with a smile, “yeah i do, i wanted to be closer to you and I know this is probably way too fast, but i love you so much and I just can't live without you, you are everything to me and i want you to know that i have no regrets and i will never have any,” he said as you started tearing up and smiled at him as you couldn't believe that the distance between you two was finally over.

“You did this for me?” you asked quietly as he nodded softly, “well i'm not gonna lie this is very surprising but im happy, i miss you everyday and this changes that..but what about your parents?” you asked as he sighed, “actually dovey, they were the ones who convinced me to move over here. They saw how much i missed you, i didn't even leave the house i just want to be with you and well they knew i had to move...look if this isn't what you want then-” he said as you cut him of quick, “no, stop, this is what i want, i just want you to be sure cal,” you said as he walked over to you and kissed you as he held you in his arms and had placed your hands near his heart, “dovey i already told you, no regrets. This heart beats for you only. I want this, not just for me but for us.” he said as you smiled and just knew this had to happen.

“Also i want you to live here with me, i wanna wake up with you and fall asleep by your side, i can't stand being away from you dovey,” he said as you smiled and nodded, “of course i will, you're everything to me.” you said as you kissed once again. This was meant to be. It was the beginning. There were no regrets on either side, you were all in. you and him are soulmates, it just took a while to settle.