#and whatever sve was doing

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

This is random, but, could I request the bachelors (+sve guys) discovering the farmer's like, half vampire (dhampir) but hates having to feed on prey, but they biologically need to and are starving and need to snack on a person, but can't bring themselves to do it for whatever reason.

Or is that a bit too morbid for this blog?

Anyway, cheers op ✌️

I don't think this question is too morbid, dear anon, as I have previously posted on more grimmer topics such as *checking my masterlist* the reaction to children turning into pigeons, the reaction to Farmer's death and them as the walking dead in Crimson Baldlans- you get the point. So yeah, thanks for the ask, and enjoy ☺️💕

_________________________________________

SDV/SVE bachelors discover that Farmer is a dhampir and refuses to feed on blood:

Stardew Valley:

Alex:

Alex has been slipping Farmer his grandmother's baked goods for about a month now, just so they'll have something to eat! Skinny as a twig...

But once the athlete found out the truth... Now it's clear why his friend was refusing - they can only drink human blood. Isn't that right? He doesn't know the thing about vampires and stuff.

But Farmer will die without blood, and that's not allowed! Alex urges them to drink some of his blood so they don't faint from starvation.

And then he promises to work something out so that Farmer can eat normally and not feeling guilty.

Sebastian:

While Farmer was telling him about his origins, Sebastian stood still, fascinated by such news. His friend is half vampire, that's... pretty cool.

But quickly came out of his state of admiration when he heard from Farmer their refusal to feed on blood, not wanting to harm humans and animals. That's what the local emo was worried about.

It's good that Farmer is kind, but this refusal to eat could conversely drive them into a wild obsession with blood, where they'll attack every person they meet.

Sebby is willing to lend a helping hand while he looks for some alternative way of feeding. Yeah, that's right, Farmer. You need to drink. Don't argue.

Shane:

Huh, nice joke, he almost believes Farmer. ...It's a joke, right? Tell him it's just a dumb joke. Sigh, fuck...

What's Shane gonna do with Farmer now? A dhampir (or whatever it's called) refuses to drink blood and slowly dies.

He doesn't care what they think, they need to eat! He doesn't want to lose a friend.

Okay, look. Shane thinks Farmer should feed on him for now. Don't fucking look at him like that! They need food! Let's keep it that way for now, and then he'll find some alternative for Farmer.

Harvey:

Although the very information about Farmer's origins clearly shocked Harvey, he still doesn't feel anxious or afraid around them.

But denying your body food is a very bad idea. The doctor realises that Farmer has no desire to hurt anyone, but torturing themselves isn't an option either.

Hmm, how about a blood donation? If he donates blood in the bag, would that be a good alternative?

Or just let Farmer bite him in the neck right away? No, Harvey's not afraid of them and we trust them. Please, listen to him, Farmer. He's trying to help you. And everything's gonna be all right.

Sam:

Wow, Farmer really is half vampire?! That's awesome! Although... They look skinny and sickly, so maybe it's not so cool after all.

Man, you can't starve yourself! Isn't there any way to feed Farmer without hurting anyone?

Sammy scoured every forum on the internet to find useful information. There was nothing but descriptions in fictional universes (Damn...).

So the young guitarist held out his hand to them with one word, "Bite." Farmer is outraged, but Sam stands firm on his decision because he doesn't want his friend to starve to death.

Elliott:

So many novels and stories had been written about vampires, but Elliott had always thought it was fiction... Farmer disproved it by their mere existence.

Though the writer was burrowing with the urge to shower Farmer with questions about the life of a half-blood vampire and everything, their weakness was unsettling.

Abandoning blood drinking in the name of not wanting to harm living creatures? Noble, but no creature would last long without food, Elliott though, even non-humans.

So Elliott unbuttons his shirt collar in one fell swoop and dramatically cries out "Bite me!". Um, well, a little dramatic.

Stardew Valley Expanded:

Victor:

Victor nearly collapsed to the floor from the information he was being bombarded with. So Farmer's.... not human?

The spaghetti lover is certainly glad his friend isn't going to eat him, but... Starving themselves won't do any good either!

Farmer's looking pretty thin and pale back then, and they're clearly getting worse by the day due to their refusal to hunt and drink blood.

Victor will immediately begin a search for an alternative feeder for vampires and dhampires and while they search for an answer - Farmer can taste his blood. He's a little scared, but he won't leave his friend in the in trouble.

Magnus Rasmodius:

Magnus is surprised. No, not that vampires and dhampir existed, but that Farmer had managed to hide their origins from the wizard's keen eye. Usually he can see right through those who aren't human...

Well, since they have such a problem with blood, he will quickly organise food for them. There are people who volunteer to donate blood and-

No, don't even dare protest, Farmer! They realise that by refusing to eat naturally they are putting others in even greater danger! Do they know what vampires and dhampires are capable of when they're insane with hunger?!

That's right. Now, Magnus will continue to contact his colleagues to provide Farmer with help. No buts.

Lance:

Vampires are creatures not new to mages and adventurers, and exist quite peacefully with each other. That's why Lance wasn't surprised after Farmer revealed the truth to him.

But the adventurer's face was clearly concerned about Farmer's condition, for starving was a very bad idea, even if their motive was noble.

Until he finds someone among his colleagues who is a blood donor for peaceful vampires (yes, such a thing exists in Castle Village), the pink-haired man will make a cut on his hand with a dagger and give food to Farmer.

"Please don't argue, my friend. Because hunger will drive you mad.."

[lilmothgf]

Poly harvey/farmer/Rasmodius

shy nervous introverts? sign me up!!!!!

absolutely crack pair but i've been playing SVE & romancable rasmodius and I feel like they'd get along well

if you disagree with me..well ur wrong. sorry

gender neutral afab reader, pregancy/babies mention cuz these guys are family men!!..not proofread we die like men

You managed to introduce Harvey & Magnus to each other during Spirit's Eve, they were both awkward and cute but eventually found some common ground between Harveys interest in Medicine and Magnus in the arcane

Harvey probably struggled REALLY hard at first trying to talk to Magnus, i mean, both of these boys would struggle, they are both just so awkward and not use to talking to people?? Thankfully they have you for a buffer but u can bet harvey is sitting there stumbling over his words😭

When you propose polyamory to them you set up clear ground rules and make it clear they can set rules with you too, you also made it clear you were ONLY interested in them but if they said no it's okay too..

Harvey & Magnus are probably the LEAST jealous bachelors of the town so I could see them giving it a chance.

They are also the most mature out of the singles in town...

They aren't interested in dating each other but they will get along with each other and probably form a close relationship. I can see Magnus trying to introduce Harvey to healing magic.

Also Harvey will try to give herbal remedies to Magnus for his Insomnia.. Which Magnus has BAAAD... Though he might also try to treat his chronic nightmares.

Though now that Magnus has you guys in his life the nightmares aren't so bad anymore :]

...still has a hard time sleepin tho.

ummm.. both of these guys want kids so I sure hope you want a big family!!

if you choose to carry their kids u bet these guys gonna take care and pamper you right up until the births, nooo doing farmwork in the last few trimesters!! Harvey will be ... heckin stressed to say the least tho. He has to deliver his own babies??? lort...

Of course adoption is a possibility too, they don't mind. Whatever farmer prefers.

Magnus often stays home to care for the kiddos since you and Harvey both have day jobs, so he makes having a big family easier.

They love being dads, they are so thankful farmer for u giving them this chance. ❤️❤️❤️

Both Magnus & Harvey are gentle parents :)

[reallyghostlypost]

Welwick is really suspicious...

Especially in SVE. Magnus calls her a good friend and visits her tent during the fair but she never visits him or talks about him. On the other hand she's constantly in Qi's casino, she basically lives there. (In fact she could broadcast her tv show from there, since both places have that space/starry sky theme. Who knows, maybe Qi gifted her a room.)

So what's going on with her? Is she helping Qi in whatever he's doing? Qi mentions that the casino is a place where he gathers people with unusual abilities and having a gifted diviner on his team would be really useful. He even lets her vomit in his vases!

I wonder if FlashShifter will develop her character more in some future update...

[nicegaai]

Do you have any midsommar headcanons?

anon i gotta be honest . no i dont ❤️ bc the most i know about the real life holiday / celebration (?) is from ari asters movie of the same name. and from other peoples het/alia posts. 😔 im a fake fan / history nerd / american w/o context

to make sm up on the spot, i think sve would like the structure of getting to host every year, at the same location, inviting mostly the same people, playing the same games. i always headcanon him as being a little autistic about routines and i think holiday traditions would fall into that :') not that things DONT change a little every year (FINE, dan can host, but im going to make sure everything else is done right) but its JUST NOT x until hes done y !!! no peter you arent doing that right it has to be THIS way or its JUST NOT midsommar. and then every year something minor goes wrong and he is So Good at being flexible and not having a freakout about it he can hold it in so well and not even be mean about whatever someone else did to ruin his day, mostly. kind of.

[noodle-shenaniganery]

Friendly reminders to all former and current SVE/ESE/Special Education/[whatever it is called where you live] students:

You are not childish for expressing your emotions.

You are not “defiant” for having boundaries.

Your stims and tics are not your fault.

Your emotions are not your fault.

Struggling with things other people can do easily does not impact your worth.

Your level of dependence on others does not impact your worth.

It is okay to not understand things.

It is okay to not try your very best all the time.

It is okay for your best to look different from other people’s.

It is okay to need more rest.

It is okay to have good and bad days, and to have them look different than other people’s good and bad days.

It is okay to be behind on things.

It is okay to want to be treated like everyone else.

It is okay to want to be treated differently.

You should be allowed to make your own decisions when you can.

You deserve all the support(s) you need/want.

Your efforts are good enough.

Your opinions and experiences are valid and important.

Your interests are valid and important.

You are valid and important.

I hope you have a good day. ❤️

[jerevision]

Thank you @sunnysideoflondon @tuituipupu and @invece-sto-sdraiato for the tag!

I don't have Spotify so I just made my Windows Media Player (or whatever it's called these days) shuffle the songs I have saved on my computer. I have... a lot lol. Although I have specific genres of music which I enjoy, if I like what I hear I will play it on repeat regardless of genre. So fasten your seatbelts:

Bastille - Skulls

The Travellers - Ħafi Paċi Kuluri

Röyksopp ft. Erlend Øye - Remind Me

The Postal Service - The District Sleeps Alone Tonight

Francesco Gabbani - In Equilibrio

Love Fame Tragedy - Multiply (the version ft. Dan Smith of Bastille)

Sydänpuu - Kahleet

Sonata Arctica - My Selene

Poets of the Fall - Fire

Sam Sparro - Black and Gold

Tagging @bisonaari @mariamourayoutuber @c28hunter @zomb1edude @sve-sto-znam @drugsforaddicts @mitamicah and anyone else who sees it and wants to do it!

[peppersjam]

My Top 10 Albums of 2022

Like I hoped/hypothesized in my Top 10 last year, moving to Austin (and COVID at least temporarily easing up) brought me back to live music. I saw Snail Mail, Jose Gonzalez, Bon Iver, Andrew Bird with Iron and Wine, Bartees Strange, a smorgasbord of amazing acts on one hot Friday at Austin City Limits, and a handful of delightful local artists. The Bon Iver show affected me in a completely unexpected way, and triggered a year-long obsession with i,i and 22, a million, two albums that I had filed away as somehow lesser than For Emma and the self-titled. Googles "Bon Iver tour" again.

Kendrick finally released a new album and I completely bounced off of it after a few listens. I guess having the insta-cortisol-injection of "We Cry Together" on the tracklist is a problem for me. The new Arctic Monkeys album was also a bit of a disappointment. As it stands, it's my least favorite album of theirs. I'm sure I'll give both of these another shot, though. They'll probably pop up under the heading of "what was I thinking?" five years from now.

My pre-2022 albums that should've made their respective lists were heavily influenced by my reading Dan Ozzi's "Sellout." - Against Me! – "Transgender Dysphoria Blues" (2013) rocks SO HARD and checks so many boxes for me. Where can I get more folk-punk? - Jimmy Eat World – "Clarity" (1999) in some alternate universe where I started blogging at 10 rather than slightly older than that. - Cory Wong. I'm cheating here. I don't particularly care for his albums as a format, but his shockingly highly-produced YouTube show includes compelling, virtuosic funk/bluegrass/big-band/whatever performances, like this one with Sierra Hull which I have watched a silly number of times.

I had 8(!) runners up this year but that stretches the definition beyond the editorial standards of this fine publication, so I've narrowed it down to 3:

Angel Olsen – "Big Time" (may have cracked the list if I didn't miss the AO/SVE concert for a last-minute vacation)

Beach House – "Once Twice Melody" (Beach House doesn't excite me at all as a music listener – call it a hangover of an uninspiring show several years ago – but this album, like most of their music, is irresistible)

Delicate Steve – "After Hours" (do I love Delicate Steve only because of the name? Absolutely not.)

10. Sharon Van Etten – We've Been Going About This All Wrong

Finally! An SVE album released in the era of me being a massive SVE fan. I wrote about this earlier, but she was my go-to through the first two years of COVID. We've Been Going About This All Wrong doesn't quite reach the highs of Remind Me Tomorrow, but I still find myself getting lost in the album every time I listen to it.

9. Plains – I Walked with You a Ways

According to my driver's license and my voter registration, I'm a Texan. To follow up Saint Cloud, this time as Plains (with Jess Williamson as a partner in crime), Katie Crutchfield is pushing even further in the Americana/Country direction, giving me the gift of a comfortable nest to curl up into in my new environs. Yes, I have played this album, several times, loud, while driving through hill country west of Austin. It works.

8. PUP – The Unraveling of PUPTHEBAND

It feels good to like an emo band that is still making (good) albums. I'm not sure why I hadn't heard of PUP before this year, but they started popping up all over the place as I started poking around during my read of "Sellout." The first 5 tracks here are my favorite 5 song run of the year.

7. MUNA – MUNA

The most magical musical moment of the year for me was in March. We were at Mañana getting a coffee one Friday afternoon, and we saw a stage being set up on its courtyard. It was during SXSW, so that much wasn't unexpected. We Googled and realized that MUNA would be playing later that day. We walked back after work and saw a tiny, free, incredible MUNA show. They played a bunch of songs off of the yet-unreleased new album, and it was obvious that the album would be packed with exquisite pop morsels. June 2022: it was, and it was good.

6. Big Thief – Dragon New Warm Mountain I Believe In You

Big Thief are not doing anything flashy. They're not reinventing rock. They're not subverting the indie folk moniker. Like virtuosic short story authors, they're crafting small, isolated worlds within each song, giving the listener only as much as they need. Adrianne Lenker is not just a genius writer (as I've mentioned before) but a ruthless editor. I'm saying this about an album that has 20 tracks. Maybe I need a ruthless editor.

5. Carly Rae Jepsen – The Loneliest Time

The title track, a.k.a. "The Loneliest Time feat. Rufus Wainwright," a.k.a. the one song that I drove around the block for to hear the end of this year (apologies Earth, the Prius c was mostly in EV mode), a.k.a I guess I like disco now?

With each CRJ release I prepare myself to be underwhelmed. It just doesn't seem like she could continue to release crisp, zeitgeist-defying pop albums. While I was intrigued that she worked with Rostam for "Western Wind," I was left feeling "meh" when the single dropped, which further reduced my expectations. The album releasing on the same day as Taylor Swift's Midnights was trial by fire, and I listened to "The Loneliest Time" on repeat for a total of twice as many plays as Midnights. Take that for data!

4. Black Country, New Road – Ants From Up There

The most significant musical discovery of 2022 for me is the UK Experimental Rock scene that is producing BCNR and Jockstrap. I don't think it's a cohesive "thing" to discover, but anytime I hear that some members of a band met at some artsy school in the UK (like the XX) and/or someone somehow shows up on multiple albums on this list in a single year (Georgia Ellery, how?), I take notice. More than any other album on this list, when I listen to this one, I want to talk or write about it. I wouldn't be surprised if I listen to and laud it 18 years from now the same way I listen to and laud Arcade Fire's Funeral today.

3. Bartees Strange – Farm to Table

If I write out a description of the styles of each song on this album, it doesn't sound like it would be cohesive or even compelling. Bartees pulls inspirations from bands like Bon Iver and The National so directly that it's practically pastiche. It's not though: Bartees injects so much of himself into the music that it's unmistakably him. The fact that he finds inspiration from so many places and is so excited to share them all with us is a feature, not a bug. I selfishly hope that his next album is more cohesive, but I can't argue with the results of his earnestness so far.

2. Animal Collective – Time Skiffs

Animal Collective's 2004-2009 run of LPs (Sung Tongs, Feels, Strawberry Jam, and Merriweather Post Pavilion) were pivotal to (a) the indie scene as a whole and, more importantly, (b) me in 2009 once I decided that I shouldn't just listen to The Beatles for the entirety of college. I did not expect to ever love or get lost in an AnCo album again the way I did with those 4. But here we are: "Time Skiffs" is inching its way toward the top of my Animal Collective tier list. This record does what all good Animal Collective records do: it absorbs me. It pulls me in with soundscapes and timbral oddities, and then dunks me in a pool of melody. If you're imagining an art rock shampoo ad, then you're on the right track. Every single track on Time Skiffs does this with a shocking efficiency.

Or, to put it in their own words, from their Bandcamp page:

Time Skiffs’ nine songs are love letters, distress signals, en plein air observations, and relaxation hymns, the collected transmissions of four people who have grown into relationships and parenthood and adult worry. But they are rendered with Animal Collective’s singular sense of exploratory wonder. Harmonies so rich you want to skydive through their shared air, textures so fascinating you want to decode their sorcery, rhythms so intricate you want to untangle their sources. Here is Animal Collective's past two decades, still in search of what’s next.

Why do I bother?!

1. Jockstrap – I Love You Jennifer B

I already explained my general fascination with this thread of music (see my notes on Ants From Up There above). It's my favorite album of the year, over the near-perfect Animal Collective album for reasons that I will try to explain but don't completely make sense to me.

Hearing "Glasgow" for the first time flipped a switch in my brain that is un-flip-back-able. I need to listen to "Glasgow" as many times as possible.

If "Glasgow" wasn't that song, "Concrete Over Water" would've been. It's incidental that I heard "Glasgow" first.

I have neutral-to-negative feelings about violin in rock music. "That's dumb and unjustifiable," this album screams at me, politely.

The songs on this album sound simple, hiding their depth. The album forces me to alternate between close listening (specific production choices, structure, melodic riffs, lyrics, and on and on) and a total immersion.

Ok, fine. The shift at 1:15 of Glasgow.

[velja976]

Thank you dear supporters for all the help you are offering the people of Gaza in this dire time. I am a father of four tender babies who are paying much of their childhood and innocence in this unfair war. Please do whatever you can to help me save my family till the war ends.

Despite the suffering and hardships of this fierce war , your support and assistance ease us and grant us power and patience. Your contribution keeps a whole family safe, that is why i am asking you to donate whatever you can of at least share my link so that other donors can know about my tragedy and pain.

Iz Srbije sam,

Nemojte mi se zahvaljivati, volim sve ljude ovog sveta... ali samo LJUDE...

♥️

[g0atmama]

Heehoo I remembered that I have an adter hours selfship sideblog so I might be rambling about doing such awfully naughty things to lance after I sleep

Uh. Um. Sve mutuals if you want it let me know in like asks or dms or whatever and I'll let you what what the url is

[ashmp3]

okej prvo činjenica da sam i na telefonu i na laptopu jer sam lenja da priključim miš i skorlujem... you did it again my chatterbox 🤭 1. parfemi angels share prelep ali 27.000rsd hehehehehehe.... jednog dana drugarice jednog dana će nam to biti laganini. dalje the only oneee moj zimski parfem! lep mi je l’interdit rouge ali ga previše osetim na drugim ljudima a imam taj kompleks da volim da mirišem drugačije booo booooooo meni se sviđa intense crni više je moj vajb ja volim vanila pačuli i biber miks ali lush...... moram ja to na sebi da isprobam drugarice videla sam neki lord of misrule (bukvalno biber vanila pačuli) šta da kažem videće me opet lush. e ovaj je basic može se naći u drogerijama ali lancome la nuit tresor je bio tako čudan promenio se milion puta ali probaj ga na koži možda lijepo ide sa tvojom hemijom 😁🫶🏼 2. šminka nemate sephoru ŠTA meni je ovo novost omfg..... come to serbia momenat. BTWWW kupila sam red flag evo peku me usta love it 🥰 meni usta prirodno crvena ali ovo ih dodatno iziritira i love it. nisam nikad probala tu maskaru stavila sam je na listu (ja sad koristim braon sky high vodootporna dobra je) nudestix nikad nisam probala okej okej sve screenshotujem hvala bogu... i znaš šta! mislim da je možda vreme at my big age of 25 maybe i should try out a concelear idk maybe. ALI MOJA FACA VKJEFSVSDFNV kad sam pročitala ime ne ali ugrizla sam se za jezik drugarice ne ali radi taj age rewind u dont look day over 21 ❤️ 3. whatever that was JAOOOOOOOJ bukvalno prvo i najvažnije činjenica da si razmišljala o ovome u šetnjici me ubija like i feel like parasite eating ur brain omfg..... AND IM DOING A GOOD JOB BC HELLOOOO WHAT AN ANSWER. okej prejako počinjemo sa periferijom kao da naravno da "a ja jak kao terijer" ulazi u top 5. naravno. I OUTFITIIIIIII AJDEEEEE znači ništa bez potkošulje i zlatne kajle + na nogama air maxice kako drugačije pitam 🤭 THE WHOLE NADRKANA ORDEAL OH MY GAWWDDDDDDDD no but this is like you with a whiteboard and me nodding like olivia wilde THE IDEA. THE CAMERA WORK LMFAOOOO no i am so happy you liked this ask literally peer reviewied by ana 🫶🏼 NE ALI JA IMAM IDEJUUU ZA NYOKOSUZI -> nju vozi benga, benza, bentley, b-b-bang chan pa ne savršeno. obožavam ovu pesmu podseća me na moju drugaricu koja je rekla "jedva čekam u odem u pariz da bih mogla da stavim sutra letimo za pari nananana deo na stori". Cant make this shit up. okej i will keep it short (said both by ana and teo.... failed by both ana and teo. only thing we fail at) nuči BI bio inspo chanu jaoj ali na najgori način pravio bi se da ima dubok glas onako kao kad momci snimaju glasovnu pa prodube glas ne mogu ubiću se. AND LASTTTT BY NOT LEASTTTTT oh i love the choice this is prime chan and changbin heartbroken loverboys oh i facken love buba and jala literally were part of my og party girl days... SIGHHHH now if chan was there with me.... no comment. i should go to BED. ANYWAYYYYYY thank you so much for taking out time to answer this + sorry it happened ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

top 5 perfumes, top 5 makeup products & top 5 songs you would play to bracha… 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🤭💘

ouhhh i haven’t actually gotten to smell very many perfumes that i liked 😔 i truly mostly don’t like anything (at least out of the things i’ve gotten to smell which is all like. drugstore available stuff like no niche perfumery things which i rly do want to get into!) howeverrr… i do have some that i like:

1. killian angel’s share (i WILL buy this for myself.. one day 🧿)

2. givenchy l’interdit rouge

3. d&g the only one = ysl libre intense

4. tom ford black orchid

5. fuckass lush honey i washed the kids LMFAO i really love it it’s my after-shower scent, doesn’t smell incredible upon first spritz but it develops into this gorgeous subtly sweet scent that i looove to go to sleep with. same goes for lush twilight but it’s a lavender scent so you’d hate it kfhskkd

makeup products well 🤭 i WOULD usually put l’oreal 24h matte foundation here prob as number one however i haven’t worn foundation in almost a full year now so!

1. fenty beauty gloss bombs yes they’re incredible yes they’re worth it. every single cent. i get one every time i travel somewhere w a Sephora LMAO i currently have fenty glow & fu$$y currently 💋

2. maybelline lifter gloss (currently own 5 tubes (moon, 2x silk, topaz, red flag and looking to get more i need one in every bag at every occasion. way cheaper but also way less thick/long lasting version of fenty)

3. maxfactor 2000 calories mascara in waterproof listen no matter how i flip it no matter which mascara i try (ive tried too faced, benefit, ysl, dior and soooo fawking ON) this one is just IT. the only one with such good separation and holding up a curl and lasting the entire day. my main girl always

4. nudestix! i have 3 shades rn (naughty n spice, bondi bae, in the nude) i use them depending on my mood for the day as blush & bronzer and they give such a beautiful sunkissed vibe i love them sm. longwearing too

5. maybelline age rewind (fuck you in advance teo) concealer in shade 5 brightener it’s so good stays all day doesn’t crease mwaaah mwah i also use it for spot concealing if i get spots 😌 gorgeous & cheap you gotta love it

BEST FOR LAST…. literally where do i beginnnn bang chan answer my calls i need you to HEAR my vision. this is just going to be off the top of my head bc if i really got out my playlists and started to get into this i’d need to quit my job to focus on this alone 🙏🏼

1. periferija by voyage & nucci i have already gone ON abt this and i want to show this to them with super selfish intent like to talk them into doing something similar bc i just really really truly need chan and changbin going STUPID on a balkan beat it’s actually crucial to me. lyrics gotta be in a similar vein too A JA JAK KAO TERIJER i know you know. these fits bc you KNOW i need the tank top + chain combo

2. nad****a by zera oh listen this is again selfish of me bc i have this VISION of all of them doing this and ofc felix starts the song what with ‘dragon’ being in the meaning of his name and it’s gotta be a super dynamically shot video kinda like aespa supernova only at the club. felix insane face to voice ratio has to shock your system within the first 5 seconds of a song for it to truly HIT so he goes ‘ko zmaj bebo ja sam tako nadrkana’ [slaps the camera away from himself] ‘oko nas samo momci s lošim navikama’ [an almost 360 spin of the camera wherein you see bracha and then it gets to hyunjin who gets the next line] ‘ceo splav noćas popunjen je barbikama’ [zoom out to see all of danceracha aka my pretty dollface racha w hyunjin in the middle] i could go on. what i personally would change abt the song though is instead of the prechorus/verses i would do a lot of rapping i know my bracha would devour the track i am 100000% sure of it. the one other line i would NEED to keep is chan doing ‘gde god dođem imam pratnju kao predsednik’ ofc coupled w a shot of them all behind him 😌 uhm can you tell this was ALL i thought abt on todays walk LMFAOOOO i need to be like. sedated

3. keeping it SHORT NOW PROMISEEE i just gotta show nyokosuzi to my channieeeeeee i know he’d love it i know he’d relate jebeni lider etc you know how it goes i would LOVE to see his flustered face LMFAO you know how he writes the most suggestive nastiest lyrics and then pretends he doesn’t know shit. Yes exactly

4. opanci - nucci LOOK the nasty fucking tone of voice this man has just screams changbin to me and the mix of traditional singing w the rap strikes a chord to me (loš momak by nikolija another good example) i just think they’d both love it anddd sound so good on the track it’s a win win situation

5. a classic.. GLUH I NIJEM ZBOG NJE i can’t explain to you how much i want a bouncy beat from chan i know he’s got it in him ive heard what he can do. if they WANT to be pathetic i neeeeed ‘bacam ruže sto i jednu ružu na kučku bez duše ❤️‍🩹’ energy over a delicious beat and not fuckass lose my breath with underwhelming vocals type pathetic shit (+ bonus something like Divljam w the bouncy beat and added balkan spice in the instrumental PLUSS kako gleda me ko vučica vuka no no now ive said too much.)

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

This is a pretty serious topic, so feel free to not answer if you don't want to.

How would the Sdv and Sve bachelor/ette's react to the Farmer (who's their partner) flinching when they moved suddenly? As in, the farmer subconsciously thought their partner was about to hit them

Oof...

Pretty dark topic, but I want pain and glass so why not 🥲 Thanks so much for the question, dear anon 💕

⚠️Warning: angst, mention of past abusive relationship/physical abuse, mention of domestic violence, swearing, and a lot of hurt/comfort

_________________________________________

Stardew Valley:

SDV bachelors:

Shane had never had such a desire to break someone's nose. To punch with all his might, to break a jaw, to knock out teeth, to make the bastard who dared to raise a hand against Farmer regret their cowardice and wish they'd never been born. Too bad they're somewhere far away... No, it's not a pity, let this fucking asshole die in their hellhole. What's important right now that Farmer's here, and Shane's gonna be right there with them. He's gonna suggest that Farmer go to therapy. It really helps, Shane's realized that himself. And he'll be there for Farmer, he'll never leave them. And would never hit them.

Alex knows all too well why Farmer flinched like that, and his heart filled with rage. The same way his mom clutched herself, hiding her face from the heavy hand of her alcoholic husband... The very thought that his dearest Farmer, the love of his life, had thought he would hit them, that Alex would be like his father, made him shiver with unbridled hatred for whoever had made Farmer feel that way. But the athlete will calm himself down, and do whatever it takes to help and protect Farmer. He would never, ever hit them. Never.

Sam has a look of utter confusion on his face. "Babe, what's wrong?" The young guitarist was just chasing flies, and now doesn't understand why Farmer hid their face in their hands. Is something wrong? Why do they look like they're crying? When Farmer tells him the reason (which they were previously afraid to tell), Sammy's heart just cracks to pieces. He will put his arms around Farmer and slowly rock them. If they are comfortable, Sam will listen to them carefully and try to cheer them up, showering them with kisses and affectionate words.

Elliott would simply become speechless. "My love, you didn't think I'd..." He can't even get the words out. He knows that Farmer's relatives treated them horribly, his partner have told the writer about it. He knows that recovering from such trauma will not be easy or quick. Elliott won't leave them alone with the trouble. But did they really thought that Elliott would allow himself to fall so low and raise his hand against them? The writer's in tears. It hurts him, but Elliott is in no way angry with Farmer. No, he loves them with all his heart.

Sebastian would never forget the moment in his childhood when his biological father was ready to slap him. Luckily, Robin managed to catch the man's arm before that, and Sebby never saw his bio father again. As he grew older, Sebastian realized exactly what that man had intended to do. He was disgusted to even think of doing that to anyone, much less the person he loves and adore endlessly. He would take the Farmer's hands, look them in the eye, and tell them that he loved them and would never, under any circumstances, raise a hand against them.

Harvey will put Farmer in a hug, but the doctor still won't be able to hold back the tears. Harvey knows that Farmer has only recently, on the advice of their beloved husband, sought professional help, that progress won't be immediate, and that it takes a very long, long time to work at it. But for Harvey, every time Farmer flinches at their husband's sudden movement is like the first time - shock, confusion, sadness, pain. And even worse when the Farmers began to blame themselves for this behavior. No, Farmer, it's not your fault. Harvey won't let their partner think it's their fault.

_________________________________________

SDV bachelorettes:

Abigail is hella confused.... Why are they flinched? Wha- What do they mean!? She loves Farmer, how did they even think of that?! Abby got angry, but would quickly cool down and start apologizing to an even more frightened Farmer. She didn't mean to yell at them like that, but the image that her partner thought she would take a swing at them just threw her off. Ugh, if those creeps who had hurt Farmer came to the Valley, then the amethyst lover would pelt them with such stink bombs that even the skunks would turn their noses away from them. Hehehe, good thing that made Farmer laugh. Right, fuck those bastards.

Leah can't believe her ears. Farmer, she is holding an axe! How could they think that their wife would dare swing at them with a sharp axe?! The fact that someone actually tried to swing something like that at Farmer made the blood in the artist's veins boil. She wasn't angry at Farmer, naturally, but at the bastard who'd treated Farmer like that. And don't let her partner worry: if their ex abuser dared to come in the Stardew Valley, Leah would definitely use her axe... Okay, maybe not so radical, but this person won't lay a finger on her precious partner. She'll defend them to the last, that's for sure.

Penny is a very peaceful, fragile and gentle girl. How can anyone imagine that she is capable of such a thing - to hit Farmer, love of her life? For a young teacher, family is sacred! Her spouse, her children, it's... She will never agree with the people who justify violence and abuse with "discipline" or "tough love". For in Penny's mind, someone who can easily hurt a loved one is not worthy of those loved ones. The red-haired girl bursts into tears. She cannot calmly see how Farmer is scared and hurt because of their ex. But she will find the way to help them. Together, they will overcome it.

Maru was upset at first, because she thought that the Farmer was afraid of her next invention (she could not forget the humiliating incident when they were electrocuted). Only after a couple of seconds Maru realized that they looked with fear not at her device lying on the table, but at herself. She doesn't understand what's wrong. It's not like she has any super dangerous wires or parts with her, see? What? The Farmer thought Maru was going to... hit them? She loves them! Never, you heard her, Farmer, she would never....

Emily is a person who values life and the comfort of every creature. Happiness and positive emotions for everyone around her, especially for her close people and friends. Because of this, the very thought of Farmer hiding their face from what they thought was a punch made the blue-haired girl upset. Farmer had told her about their... not-so-good relatives, who left her lover with this trauma. Emily tries her best to make the house as comfortable as possible for Farmer, and they know it and will always be grateful to their loving wife.

Haley had had partners in the past who, as she found out later, lived by the principle of "beats means love". She wouldn't let those pieces of shit around her anymore, and made a promise to herself never to get involved with such people and never to fall to their level. And Farmer flinched so much at Haley's sudden movement made her remember her exes. She is furious. But right now, the most important thing to her was her beloved Farmer. Haley apologizes for the sudden move, shares her experience and wisdom on how she handled the abuse earlier, and assures Farmer that she will never do to them what Haley's exes tried to do to her.

_________________________________________

Stardew Valley Expanded:

SVE bachelors:

Lance had many swordsmanship and magic teachers in his youth. Almost all of them were excellent and taught him many things that helped him in life. There were some that set impossible conditions for Lance, and when he failed, took up their tools to punishment... Lance had the guts to stand up to it, and there were also people who stood up for him. Farmer didn't have anyone to help then, and Lance won't let that happen again. He genuinely loves Farmer and he wouldn't dare let himself fall so low. They vowed to each other to share both joy and sorrow together. Lance will always love them.

Magnus faced various conflicts when he was married for the first time. Misunderstandings, quarrels, arguments - it's quite natural for a couple. But the wizard would never, ever raise a hand against his partner, and he would despise anyone who justified violence and abuse of authority. He would immediately calm the shuddering Farmer and begin to comfort them. If those pathetic excuse of humans showed up at their farm, Magnus would disintegrate them with a snap of his fingers. Ministry rules? There's a one rule in the Mage Law that allows the use of magic for self-defence and the protection of loved ones. So let the Farmer not worry about this.

Victor, overwhelmed with the good news about his bridge-building practice, raised both arms to hug Farmer, but immediately pulled back when he saw how much they flinched. "Honey, did I do something wrong?" "You didn't... You're not going to hit me, are you?" "What?...." If anyone heard the sound of cracking glass, know this - Victor's heart had shattered into a thousand shards. The spaghetti lover was confused for a few moments, but pulled himself together and cautiously approached the Farmer. Victor hugged them tightly, allowing his partner to snuggle into his shoulder and cry while Victor listened to them, slowly rocking and covering them with kisses.

_________________________________________

SVE bachelorettes:

Olivia is not mad at Farmer in any way. And quickly put a stop to all their attempts to make themselves look guilty for being so flummoxed by the sudden movement of Olivia's hand. Her partner has been victimized in the past by the simply disgusting treatment from the scum who dared to reach out their paws to Farmer has spurred Olivia to pull up all her connections in the city. She knows their names and all the information she needs to turn their lives into a nightmare. In the meantime, Olivia herself will devote all her attention to her precious Farmer and family.

Claire could not have imagined that her desire to show her partner a new ballet movement she had learnt would end like... this: Farmer shivers slightly and looks at the red-haired girl with a share of fear, while Claire stands still, motionless as if struck by lightning. The former Jojarmart cashier slowly and carefully walks over to Farmer and asks permission to hug them. The Farmer agreed, of course, and before launching into an endless stream of words about how it was their own fault, Claire only reassured them and continued to hug them. She was now too shocked that the Farmer had thought Claire would dare to injure them....

Sophia was completely unaware of what had just happened: the pink-haired girl raised her hand for her partner to high-five, but instead they covered their heads with their hands as if expecting a punch. Had she done something wrong? What, did the farmer really expect a punch? She... She... If Sophia tried to say anything, Farmer wouldn't understand anything anyway - the flood of tears on Sophia's face and the lump in her throat from crying interrupted all words. She would hug the Farmer, hold onto them like a lifeline and sob. She would say through her sobs that she loved them very much and would never be a monster like those who had hurt Farmer.

_________________________________________

[reallyghostlypost]

So, there are multiple magic shrines in the game. This post will be about the shrine where you can make your spouse forget all about you, since the other two are smaller in scope, only really affecting you and your family. The memory shrine on the other hand will modify the memory of every person that knows about the farmer's marriage. The shrine doesn't seem to rewrite reality, since you still need to write and submit the paperwork for divorce, and it doesn't erase the memory completely, since the targeted character will mention the farmer looking familiar. It also seems to force everyone to think about something else whenever the topic comes to their minds, since they don't realize obvious issues like someone not knowing who the farmer is even after the farmer lived in Pelican Town for years or a family member suddenly moving back into their old home. But we know that the spell is very strong, since there's nothing anyone can do to reverse or break the curse.

I'll try the 'read more' thing again, maybe it'll work this time:

In vanilla this all makes sense, after all the townspeople being helpless against the magic of the shrines is normal. And them not noticing obvious changes, like someone not knowing who the farmer is even if the farmer moved in the Valley years ago, can also be explained by the fact that they have no ability to protect themselves from magic and no way to even recognize the effects of a spell cast on them. At best, some of them have some sort of magical affinity, but without any training or experience it won't help much. In vanilla, it also makes sense that Rasmodius doesn't realise, or cares, that someone in Pelican Town got cursed. He almost never interacts with the rest of the town and doesn't seem interested in what happens there at all, so it's possible he won't even notice that something is off or that someone is behaving differently. It's also possible he can sense that the magic comes from his ex-wife's shrine, and he does his best to avoid her, so he might not interfere even if he can tell that someone got cursed. So, in vanilla the farmer is free to do whatever they want.

But it's more complicated in SVE. Unlike in vanilla, Magnus is now directly responsible for the safety of the community and can't avoid his ex if she's harming someone in Pelican Town, and it's hard to believe that the villagers having permanent magical induced amnesia will go unnoticed for too long. There are now wards around Pelican Town so magic passing through them would probably disrupt them, and Magnus visits the town occasionally and probably interacts with the mayor often enough, given his new duties. Even if he still doesn't know the residents enough to notice someone suddenly acting differently, it still increases the chance that the curse will be discovered. And SVE makes it clear that magic is not exactly subtle and that mages have a keen sense when it comes to detecting magic and other types of energies - Magnus and the farmer can feel small changes happening deep in the forest, Magnus and Lance can feel when a snowstorm is approaching or when nature is awakening in spring, and Magnus can feel the void shard the farmer is carrying. Marlon can too for that matter, which shows that dark magic is easily recognisable by those who know what to look out for. Even if Magnus is mildly affected by the spell, since he'll know about the farmer's marriage, it's harder to accept that the shrine's magic can go unnoticed for too long.

But SVE complicates this further by letting you marry Magnus and Lance and then wipe off their memories. They are not only highly trained wizards but are also surrounded by other trained wizards. Can't anyone around them sense that something is wrong? The farmer getting accepted by the mage/adventurer community and having their talents recognized hinges on the fact that both Magnus, and later Lance, realized their potential and vouched for their talents. All the adventurer and mage community (thousands of people) know about the farmer comes from these two and Marlon, won't one of them suddenly not knowing who the farmer is be suspicious? The farmer could have been part of the guild for years at this point, how could Magnus not know them? Besides, there are probably reports and other bits of paperwork detailing the relation between the farmer and both Magnus and Lance, paperwork that the farmer doesn't have access to so they can't destroy it. It would only take one person to notice the history of their collaboration on different projects or the reports on the farmer's abilities and progress written by these two to realize that some magical shenanigan has happened. Sure, the shrines are powerful in vanilla, but how strong is their magic in SVE? And at least Magnus is a trusted member of the Ministry of Magic, which apparently write rules and take decisions that the rest of the mages have to obey, surely there must some security measures in place, right? Especially against mind manipulation. The farmer only uses the shrine to wipe their spouse's memory of their relation, but it's possible that it can be used to modify any memory, the farmer simply doesn't need it for anything else. How much damage can it do if used by somone politically motivated?

Of course, then the question is why isn't the witch using the shrine this way to get her revenge. Maybe the shrine isn't that dangerous, or maybe she's not capable. After all, dark magic seems to corrupt the mind, and it's possible that she's too far gone to be able to think up this type of long-term plans. Also, we see Magnus cast a protection spell on his ancient fruits against her, so maybe he expects something from her and protected himself in advance. But he never suspected the farmer, so remained vulnerable to the shrine's magic. But still, the fact that he's this vulnerable is the problem. It's also possible that either she or the shrine aren't that strong. Nobody seems worried that there's an angry witch bothering Magnus and looking for revenge - Magnus acts annoyed and guilty, and according to Lance everybody else finds it hilarious. It's possible that she never was very powerful in the first place, so no one considers her a danger. As for the shrine, maybe making someone forget their marriage is truly all it can do. But the fact that a small shrine hidden in a swamp by an outcasted and corrupted by hatred witch can affect him this badly is pretty worrisome. After all, there is always the risk that another similar shrine is out there, more powerful or simply more dangerous.

And actually, we know there are, since Qi created a very powerful shrine just for the farmer to mess around with the mines. I wanted to write about both shrines, but this post is long enough, so I left it out for the time being.

[acealistair]

can i get some fuckin uhhhhhh validation

[outlying-hyppocrate]

it is later. now. like i was saying. the show in my head. it doesn't have a name. but it starts with bum-bum koma for whatever reason. (even though this is a song about like. Society. it sounds good and so that it shall be.) not sure what the intro would look like. but i promise it fucks. i only really have a beginning and an end to this. (the first season.) the beginning is. well. she goes to university. the end is. her friend kisses her while they're both listening to music and. misinterpretation !! friend leaves. magda tries to get her friend to come back. (little does magda know she is very gay. she shall realize that. later. season 2. if i don't give up on this.) also. they are listening to letnja (which is coincidental because. it is a summer song. and this is at the end of the first year. so. summer.) and. magda tells her friend (i keep saying "her friend" because i haven't given her a name. let's call her rose) to "wait!" when the song goes "da mogu sve!" which i think means. i can do everything. (ah yes. the absolute language skill i have.) so. just very.

oh do i have an absolute idea for a story.

[zecoritheweirdone]

For clarification about winning, you just need to get the goose to retreat

oh, then i could probably beat it. i’ve read a post on here that shows how to beat a goose(as somewhat-seen in the tags of the last post).

question is, would i want to beat it?

[yeehawbvby]

Falling Away With You | Ch. 16*

Sebastian x F!Reader and M. Rasmodius x F!Reader

Rating: Mature/Explicit

Chapter Summary: Let’s give it up for round 2!! Enjoy! >:3c

Author’s Note: Pls do not judge for the corny Legend of Zelda alternatives weunfjksdmcx. SVE continuity, and whatever

Speaking of which, y'all finally get to meet Victor! A wonderful bachelor from the SVE mod, imo.

Table of Contents + Work Summary

Check it out on ao3!

Prev | Next

“Nice to finally meet you.” The average-height (big day for short people!), Gotoroan stranger smiles warmly, reaching to shake my hand. 

“Finally?” I take his hand in mine, but rather than looking at him I turn to Seb and grin. A big, goofy, punchable grin.

He rolls his eyes. “I might’ve mentioned you once or twice.”

“All good things,” Victor reassures. 

I look back at him with a playful glare in my eyes. I don’t know him well enough to be an ass yet, but it’s tempting to challenge him. Interrogate him, even.

As we walk back down the hill from the train station, I’m sandwiched between the two men, but keep closer to Seb for comfort. I’d hoped he fucked the nerves out of me, but nope! They’re still there! Still just as bad with strangers as always.

While they catch up with each other, I take in the pretty surroundings, my eyes lingering on Linus. He’s sat by a small campfire outside of his tent, munching on a fish that he must’ve caught and baked over the open flame himself. 

I’ve been meaning to try and talk to him, as he seems nicer than the townsfolk make him out to be, but never have the courage or the time to follow through. Maybe if I can get him alone sometime — the less people around, the better, when it comes to my social abilities — I’ll have the guts to strike up a conversation. That’s an endeavor for another day.

When we arrive back to the basement, I shuffle through my bag for the character sheets I brought along. Thankfully, they didn’t get crumpled when I abandoned them for… a more noble cause.

“What class do you want?” Seb me asks from across the room, unfolding the playing mat.

“Whatever’s available, I ain’t picky. I just can’t DM.” 

“I’ve got that covered,” Victor adds. 

“You usually go warrior, yeah?” Seb asks him. I’m assuming he answered with a nod, because I don’t hear a verbal follow up. “That leaves us with wizard and healer.”

“Fine, dibs on healer then.”

I don’t bother bringing the other sheets to the table, wanting to save as much judgment as possible. I skulk over, holding the paper against me like a fucking gremlin bracing onto its treasure. I’m a little worried about this, and not just because my design is corny — think: magical girl, but with a cloak on — but rather because I’ve never done a campaign in-person before. Usually they’ve been with randos on the internet. No pressure to perform with people I’ll never meet.

Victor had a figure made of his character apparently, which I enviously eyeball while Seb flips through a lined notebook for his own. I know this guy is rich but I can’t help but imagine that lil’ model costing a fortune if he commissioned it. Or maybe he made it himself?

A quiet lil “ah” sounds from across the table as Seb settles on the page he wants. Maybe it was dumb to feel embarrassed about my own OC. He just has a… collage, we’ll call it, of a generic anime guy wearing various wizard-y garments, pointy hat and all. A real Hogwarts!AU Ravenclaw!Sasuke looking motherfucker. It is truly so poorly photoshopped, and appears to be taped into place next to the (surprisingly) neatly-written stats.

I stifle a laugh, which only goes noticed by Seb, who sneers at me beneath his hair. Modern!AU Sasuke looking motherfucker…

“Ready?”

Seb and I look to the source and nod, and Victor dives right into our plot, scattering some small plastic props across the board to set the scene.

The game lasts a short few hours, and goes a lot more smoothly than I’d anticipated. Once I got into the swing of things, and rolled a few lucky 20s, I felt more comfortable with myself and my character. The three of us absolutely crushed it, too. 

Victor and Seb were both downed during our final boss, and because of a pretty mediocre roll, I was only able to resurrect one. I asked them to roll for the opportunity, not really knowing who the better option of the two was – leaving up to fate, if you will. Much to Victor’s chagrin, Seb rolled higher. We won even without Victor, though, and with a good rating. 

It helped that the story was influenced heavily by a mish-mosh of The Legend of Lonk plot lines. Made things easier for me to follow, and helped me know what to expect from the mobs that weren’t canon to Solarian Chronicles. I noticed it during our game, but kept quiet, not wanting to mess with the flow. Victor admitted he took some creative inspiration after we wrapped up. 

“Fucking nerd,” Seb muses. 

“They’re good games!” 

“No, yeah, I agree,” I nod in Victor’s defense. “Lonk is a fucking masterpiece of a series.”

Seb groans while Victor excitedly asks, “Oh, you play too?!” I nod. “Which game is your favorite?” Yeees, ask me more about my hyperfixations! 

“Air of the Wild, for sure.”

“That one’s so good, maybe second or third in my books. I’m personally more into Skyward Spear myself.”

“God damnit,” Seb mumbles to himself. Victor and I both ignore him.

“Did you hear they’re remaking it?” 

Victor beams. “Seriously?!”

“Yeah! It might push Air of the Wild 2 back a year or, like, three , which sucks, but it should be out by Winter Star. At least, that’s what I’ve read.” 

“Are they only improving the graphics, though? Or is it a full, mechanics-based remaster?”

“I dunno, I think they’re just —“ 

“I’m gonna order some food,” Seb quietly declares, opening up a delivery app on his phone. He saunters across the room to his bong and starts, I dunno, setting it up? I’ve never Done The Weed, I have no idea what he’s doing with that thing.

“You’re not going to offer us anything?” Victor pouts.

“Oh, now you want to pay attention to me?”

I laugh, “Are you grumpy that we’re bonding without you?”

He sits back in his stool and glares at me while taking a hit. “‘Course not.”

“Fucking tsundere.”

Victor starts making grabby hands at the bong, and Sebastian reluctantly passes it over. Coughing through his words after a long rip, he asks, “Wanna get that greasy stuff you Ferngillians try to pass off as Gotoroan food?”

Seb shrugs, crinkling his nose slightly. “I was feeling pizza.”

They both turn to me, expecting me to make the decision. “Fuck. Uhh. Gotoroan sounds good.” I give Seb an apologetic shrug. 

_______

Victor fell asleep on the couch promptly after downing a full carton of fried rice, because munchies I guess? I dunno. I was having fun getting to know him, but semi-private time with Seb is nice. Super welcomed, honestly. My social battery was starting to feel drained, and Sebastian knows how to charge that shit right back up somehow.

We’re leaning on each other on his bed, with our backs against the wall, and watching those stupid, quick recipe/craft videos. You know, like on Buzzfeed and whatever. Stuffing the last piece of the communal veggie tempura roll into my mouth, I can’t help but choke on a little giggle, directed at how much Seb has been giggling. This man is delightful when he’s high. 

“It’s funny because it’s stupid!” he strongly defends.

“I didn’t even say anything!” 

“You thought about it.” 

He’s right. “You know you would fully hate this if you were sober,” I point out.

“‘You know you would fully hate this if you were sober.’” So high-pitched… Yoba, do I really sound that annoying to him?

“Mock me all you want, you know it’s true!”

He scoffs, “Fuck yourself.”

“I’d rather you do it for me,” I quip back half-jokingly.

He doesn’t respond for a few long seconds, seemingly zoning out on my screen as he tries to buffer what I said. Seb finally finds my eyes and sweet mother of god he looks like he wants to ravage me. 

“You wanna?” he offers, his voice quiet and husky.  

Tempting, but—

“Bro, Victor’s right there, why the fuck would I wanna?”

“Bro, the bathroom is right there,” he suggests, gesturing towards the door to our left. 

A fair point. I can’t tear my eyes from his stare, god he’s so fucking hot. My horny goblin brain is urging me to accept, but I dunno, it would be a little weird with someone right beside us… only separated by a few-seconds walk to the door… would it?

As if he saw the gears turning in my head, Seb decides for me. He scoops me up over his shoulder like I weigh nothing and carries me into the washroom. 

“Is this necessary?” I grumble into his shoulder blade. I could’ve walked myself in here but I can’t even be mad.

After taking care to shut and lock the door quietly, he settles me down, placing a towel on the counter for cushioning purposes before pushing my back against it. I can feel the slight flush of being upside down for a little bit removing itself from my face. 

Well, that, and I’m probably just rosy from being, like… tossed around.

“Yes,” he softly asserts. “Unless you don’t like being handled like that.” 

“I don’t not like it,” I confess.

The corner of his mouth curls up at my reply, and he takes my cheeks between his hands, kissing my forehead. Aww. 

I get on my tippy toes, and right before I can reach my lips up to his, he flips me around and leans over my form, forcing me to bend over the sink, just inches from my reflection. I shoulda known better than to trust so easily. His hands are firmly on top of mine, as if he’s worried I’ll leave. He probably doesn’t realize I wouldn’t give this up for anything.

With my ass pressed to Seb’s groin, I can feel how stiff he is. I tantalizingly sway my hips a little, eyeing him through the mirror. He sucks in his lower lip and fights back, his grip on my hands tightening as he lightly thrusts onto the back of my skirt, hiking it up a little in the process. Shit. Well played, nerd. I fight back, pressing my booty towards him just a little. 

He puts more weight on me, winding the breath from my lungs a little. But it’s fine, because he’s using the closer contact to nibble my neck, and holy shit this is making me feel tingly. His bluntly pointed canines piercing into my skin, just enough to not draw blood, send goosebumps across my body. 

Hm, I kind of wish there was blood…?

Fuck it, vampire kink. 

“S’that all you’ve got, emo boy?” I heckle.

The reflection of his dark eyes stab mine while I fiendishly grin at him. Without saying a word, he lowers his face back down. 

After gently licking and kissing the area, he bites again, in the same spot, hard. No blood, but I still wince, like, in a good way. A weird half-gasp, half-moan comes out at the feeling. I repeat the noise as he leans back, takes a fistful of my hair, and tugs it towards him like reins. While this is going on he cups his hand over my mouth. 

“Careful, (y/l/n),” he growls into my ear, “Unless you want Vic to hear you…”

I shake my head “no”, knowing damn well I look like a wreck. I love foreplay, but good lord I just want him to fuck me up already.

“If I move my hand, can you stay quiet for me?”

I nod again, pleading with my eyes. 

Seb slowly lifts his palm from my mouth as if he’s diffusing a bomb, claiming his other hand back as well. He begins removing his jeans — a sound I'm now happily familiar with — followed by his boxers. I reach back, desperate to feel him, but he bats my hand away. Lame . 

I turn away from his reflection to look at him directly, glaring as I shimmy my skirt off. Glowering back down at me with somewhat of a carnal look in his bloodshot eyes, he spits into his hand – I’m assuming it’s for lubricative purposes. 

I accidentally let out a blissful hum just because of how lewd that looked, and face forward again, but not before receiving a hard slap to my ass. He shoots me a wink too. Cheeky bastard. I bite my lip to hold back another noise and push my underwear to the side. I’m way too eager for him to be inside me. 

Seb smacks my ass again, catching me off guard and forcing out an airy, almost squeaky moan. I probably have fucking hearts in my eyes at this point, I think to myself, gazing up to his reflection. If this is my punishment, keep it coming, baby. 

“Off completely.” 

Staying bent over the counter, I slink the fabric down my hips, letting them fall once they’re past my mid-thigh. The moment they had gotten beneath my ass, Seb firmly groped my left cheek with his respective hand, stroking himself in preparation with his right.

He teases my entrance — pushing his head in enough for me to shiver with pleasure, but retracting it rather than going deeper.

Seb does this a few times, coating me with enough impatience, frustration, and primal need that I didn’t notice myself digging my nails into my palms. I see Seb lock onto the crescents on my skin, and he directs both of my arms behind my back.

Folding my forearms over one another, he locks his hands into mine. This is almost romantic.

“Just squeeze my hands,” he offers into my ear. “Don’t hurt yourself, darling.”

I tilt my head to face him, sneaking a kiss before mumbling a dreamy “Okay.”

Ok, fuck, it is romantic. 

Lost in thought and not entirely noticing that his cock was still up against my entrance, he takes me by surprise when he slips in. No hands needed, huh? Am I that wet?

“That wet for me?” he grins, more than satisfied with himself. Fucking telepath.

“Shut up,” I whimper, my grip on his hands tightening.

He slams into me, a loud smack filling the room. I gasp, do my fucking best to keep quiet by promptly sucking in my lips.

“Make me.” He punctuates his demand with another smack of his hips against my backside. I never thought it would be so hard to not make sex noises. 

“Oh, whoops,” he evilly chuckles, “Guess you can’t.” He wiggles my hands around behind me in the same way people make small animals “dance” by moving their lil’ baby paws around.

I defiantly shove myself back, knowing it won’t shut him up, but that it’ll definitely convey the message I’m trying to send: You’re a dick.

Seb lets go of one of my hands, takes both of my wrists in one of his fists, and he pulls, arching my back to meet his chest again. He firmly wraps his fingers around my throat — as he puts pressure onto those convenient arteries that’ll make me see stars, he tugs my face back far enough for me to see his.

A strangled moan escapes me as he starts moving again, still slowly, but with more precision and depth this time around. I try to kiss him, but the hand on my neck is firmly keeping me in place. His eyes are boring into mine like moths drawn to a flame, and he’s smiling madly. For fuck’s sake, the control he has over me is turning me on so much.

“Seb, please, I need more,” I struggle to plead out, blatantly due to his grip on me. “Fuck me.”  

“Hmm, should I?” he sadistically wonders aloud. He speeds up just a little, and I can’t help the noises that escape me. “You might have to try harder than that.”

“Mmn, please, dude.”

He takes his hand off of my throat to brush away tears that I didn’t realize were rolling out of my eyes.

“Oh, you poor thing,” he notes, rubbing his thumb across my cheek. There isn’t even a tiny smidge of real pity in his voice. It’s purely for his entertainment. Curling his fingers around my chin, he keeps torturing me. “But… ‘please’? That’s all you’ve got?”

Yearning for comfort, I bury my face into his neck to absorb the sound of my fucking agony while I let out a groan and hope he gives me what I want. Preferably soon.

“Sebastian, please,” I beg. “Just blow my back out, fucker,” I add on, the words coming out as a stupid, whiney, frustrated moan more than a command. 

Seb looks satisfied – proud of me, even – as he stops thrusting. 

He grins and tugs me by the chin to finally give the sloppy, passionate kiss I was yearning for when I was first pulled back like this, and then pushes my face down towards the towel. Before I know it, he’s annihilating my cunt. His hand’s on the back of my neck and holding me firmly in place. I’m totally at his will. There’s no way on god’s green earth that I’m going to be able to keep my mouth shut. 

I yoink one of my hands free so I can ball up some of the towel in front of me. I need to use it to muffle the yelps that are escaping my throat.

“Holy fucking shit, Sebastian~,” I yell into the towel.

“You want me to be this rough, babe?” I can’t tell if he’s talking dirty, or if the question is genuine. I can’t see enough of his face to determine it, either — the tears that were once trickling down from desperation are now replaced by those of pleasure. 

I lean up enough so he can hear me clearly, and lay my cheek on the towel that’s now damp from my saliva. Gross.

“ Yes, oh my god yes.”

“You want more?” 

I nod, desperately. “Please~”

Seb laughs sadistically, “‘Course you do… such a perfect little slut.” The insult, or term of endearment, or whatever the fuck that was supposed to be sends a chill across my skin. My boyfriend speeds up in the meantime, not sacrificing force by any means. “Shit, you feel incredible.”

Oh my god. With a death-grip on the towel, I break the other hand free from Seb’s clutch. Urgently needing to feel more, I snake my hand down to my clit. It’s not that Sebastian isn’t enough, but more that I’m feeling so much at once. This feels like the final piece to the puzzle, or whatever .

“Seb, harder.”

Moaning lowly, he firmly digs his hands into my sides, his hips moving more erratically with time. My head feels foggy with bliss, but I match my hand and my own hips to his pace the best I can. 

Completely overwhelmed, my body doesn’t even give me a fair warning before I cum. 

“Oh shit,” I laugh, sounding absolutely insane from the overstimulation. High off of it, even. “Holy fucking shit, I’m cumming Sebby~” I didn’t mean to call him that. But I think it flew right over his head anyway. 

Seb leans over, his tall frame towering over mine, leaning his face into my hair. He mutters onto my scalp, peppering it with kisses here and there. “So good, love, you’re doing so fucking good .”

I use both hands to lean up from my folded position, to help give him some more leverage, and our eyes meet through the mirror as we moan together. My arms and legs are shaking. It’s taking every muscle in my body to stay on my feet.

“Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease,” I whisper with each swift thrust. I don’t even know what the fuck it is I’m begging for, but Seb seems to.

He wraps around my torso, sneaks under my shirt, and grips the everliving shit out of my boob. A stress ball, of sorts. Seb then reaches his other hand around, effectively locking me in place, and strums my clit for me. I welcome the overstimulation with a heady mewl, making my partner smile down at my reflection.

Placing one small hand atop the larger one covering my tit, I wrap my other arm behind myself to pull him down, mumbling frantic curses into his mouth while I attempt to kiss his stupid perfect lips. Our sweaty foreheads are plastered to each other as he wrings another orgasm out of me in record time. 

“Fuck,” I practically weep, “You’re so goddamn good oh my fucking god!” 

He laughs, his voice lilting with pleasure. “Thaaat’s it baby, cum all over my cock.” Holy shit . “You feel so perfect, cumming around me with that tight little pussy of yours.” Holy shit holy fucking shit he is so hot.

Just when I’m starting to feel weak and eased from my comedown, Seb asks, “Fuck, where do you want me?”

What a gentleman, waiting for me to cum for the upteenth time today before doing so only his second. I owe him.

“Inside me,” I basically plead, hazy stars coating my vision while he continues stuffing me. “Please, I’m on the pill, please just don’t fucking stop.” I might snap again holy shit, is this guy actually a fucking wizard? I’ve never even managed to get myself off this many times in one session.

His dazed eyes scan mine, “You sure?” 

I nod, “Please, I need your cum Seb.” A bit dramatic, but it feels like the truth at this moment. 

He dips down to kiss me but winds up moaning, loudly , right into my mouth instead. He lets out a delicious, breathy laugh, and groans, “Fuck, I love you so much holy shit.” WHAT? “Mmmfuck~”

Shocked and full of butterflies, an unfortunate squeak makes its way past my lips — and we were doing so well today! A fog seizes my vision, while the combination of his confession and his throbbing length in me send me to the moon and back. This is some sort of fairytale shit. 

Our heavy breaths echo throughout the room as he pulses through both our orgasms. I fumble my back onto the sink for support afterwards, quickly wiping myself down before shakily pulling my skirt and panties back up. 

My eyes are glued to Sebastian’s, mesmerized. Inspecting him, I’m trying to decipher if he meant what he’d said, or if it was just his horny gremlin brain talking. 

He’s normally so… cool. Sweetest guy ever, but still your typical edgelord bad boy. Definitely doesn’t read as the type who would spill his deepest feelings while fucking someone’s brains out. 

He stares back, not much of an expression other than wide eyes on his face. “Fuck.”

“Sebastian,” I sing, raising a brow. Yoba, I can’t stop smiling.

“I didn’t mean for it to happen like that, I just got lost in the moment, it just like—,” he grunts, leaning his arms over the counter, placing his head atop mine. Locking me in yet again. He shouts “Fuck!” into my hair.

“Seb…” 

He backs up, hands on his face as he paces in what little space we have here. Before turning towards me again, he pulls his pants up. Thank god . It was getting hard not to let out an inappropriate giggle at a man free-balling a nervous breakdown. 

“I’m so sorry (y/n) that was so stupid. That is not how I wanted to—“ 

“Sebastian.” I walk up to him and take his cheeks in my hands, forcing him to look down at me. “Did you mean it?”

He takes a minute, scanning my face, and eventually nods apprehensively. “Yeah,” he whispers.