#and we were joking around and making TikTok references and he’s just a really cool dude I’m glad we have him

[adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy]

home from work

[thats-my-passion-right-there]

Also we could have made it SO MUCH GAYER?!?

I finally saw the mean girls musical (the movie one) I have so many fucking thoughts oh my god

[preciadosbass]

15/8/24 [1 DIY/2, if you concider the jacket diy due to the custom aspects + got 2 CDS!! key & significant photos at end]

reguarding the end of yesterdays journal, the update for when i actually went to sleep was 3:40-50. i woke up today at 8, fed boris and briefly said goodmorning to him, checked my socials, and got to adding a new addition to the things i post. i’ve decided to do weekly recaps/highlights to focus on the cool things i’ve done because i can imagine most people dont want to read the long journals i write and find out if there’s anything interesting hidden in there. i therefore started screenshotting parts of my previous journals to write it down and make a draft/drafts. at 9:20 i started making just random drafts, like unposted pictures ive taken at reptile experience, things like that.

AND saw the new gerard way sighting via my tumblr feed!! apparently he was at the cinema again XD — at 9:30 i started downloading drawing references of my fav musicians and got to drawing my killjoy oc again at the same sort of time. i finished at 10:30 and had to keep on redrawing stuff before uploading it to my phone because i couldn’t find a layer id drawn scribbles on so i could delete it lmaoo // i’m not really happy with how it came out, look for more than a quarter of a millisecond and you notice everything wrong with it. hopefully if i keep up drawing everyday i’ll improve.

i cant expect much from a second time drawing since like 4 years ago but i’m just disappointed. everyone else on here is so talented *cries /hj* i scrolled on scenemo-related posts on my tiktok feed until getting ready to go out. i didn’t plan on going out today, mostly because i thought i’d be sleeping all day, but i didn’t have the urge to go back to sleep so i tagged along to see some family with my parents. i got dressed into my dark cargo jorts [told you i’d be wearing these a lot] and my skinless shirt, as that and my silent hill shirt are the only ones that go with the cargos. i also accidentally forgot all of my bracelets, so i felt naked the entire time i was out. 11:20, i went outside with boris.

he was SO affectionate and spent the whole time i was out there circling around me while pressing his-self onto my back and then going over to my hand to nudge it, and prompt me to stroke him. he’s like this almost all the time but something about it today just made me more happy than usual. i literally couldnt stop smiling. like he was propped up on me that’s so adorable 😭. i must’ve looked crazy to all the people driving past though. i stayed out until 12:10 when i had to leave.

i went out to see my grandad at his assisted living facility, his daughter [my distant aunt], and my other grandad, of whom i didn’t know was coming until we got there. i listened to underoath and paramore during the car ride and we got there at 12:30. i was greeted by the care home’s cat and with my grandad [the one who lives independently] WITH LITERALLY JUST HIS FRONT TEETH AND NO OTHER ONES APART FROM HIS BOTTOM SET 😭 he talked about something to do with this when i came round his house not too long ago but i thought he’d have more than two?? just joking, he found it funny i was surprised too.

the care home had this outside music thingy on so me, my mum, and my mums dad sat in the garden while my aunt and dad wheeled my grandad down to our table. he wasn’t as unresponsive as he sometimes is today. it was clear he tried to make conversation and said a few things which were just so - him. [he has dementia and dosent usually speak/has little to no mobility to an extent/has been this way since i can remember etc. just tryna give you an idea of why this was amazing.] a few times he came out with like, full sentences, which was nice to hear. my aunt also gave me the can tabs shes been collecting for me. me and my dad left to go charity shopping [thrifting] at 2, while the others stayed. we went into at least seven/eight and in the third i found an evanescence cd RAA - such a good find. not even a minute later my dad pointed out an avril lavigne cd which i also took and bought.

i cant wait to play them both, i just need to find something to do while listening. i’m bad at just listening to music without another task, i end up focusing on my thoughts and not taking in or processing any of the lyrics etc. me and dad walked back to the home and sat with the others for a bit before my dad and aunt took my grandad back up to the living room area. to be fair it was getting colder and we had to head off anyways. he didn’t like the lift very much but they eventually got him into his signature chair around all of his housemates and i said goodbye to him. i gave him a hug and he kissed me on the top of my head without any prompt whatsoever, which was heartwarming. we starting driving back at 3 and i listened to gerard way on the way home before having not even a minute long nap.

we got home at 3:10 and boris was so happy to see me. he ran up to the car once we’d parked and meowed at me while lifting up his head for me to stroke it. i stayed outside with him and added the new can tabs to my tab bracelet. it was enough to finish it so i tied it off and it’s a perfect fit. its big enough to go down my arm a bit, but not big enough to fall off my wrist. at 4:50 i randomly sparked an idea to make an upcycled necklace with one of my favourite musicians on it. i didn’t have any pictures of jaime or chi that were small enough to fit on a bottlecap, so i resorted to a print of kellin quinn. my dad drilled holes through a corona bottlecap and once he was done i used mod-podge to still the picture onto it. i left it to dry on a book and went back outside with boris.

he came inside to sit on the table so i also sat there with him until around 7:20 as my phone ran out. while i was sitting with him however, i attempted to draw my killjoy oc again. its honestly embarrassing so i’m never letting anyone see it and i hope i neevr do again — but it’s a shame because i genuinely thought it’d turn out alright. in my room i checked to see if my necklace had dried [it had], doomscrolled on tiktok, and saved outfit inspo. this lasted up until 8:30 and at this time i got dressed again to try on one of the outfits in question, just so i knew how it looked on me so i can wear it the next time i do something.

the outfit was: [there’s a photo at the end but you can’t see a few things because of the lighting] a sleeping with sirens shirt, with a long sleeved burgundy shirt underneath it rolled up to just above my elbows. with my can tab bracelet, a studded single rowed cuff, a wooden bracelet, a string bracelet consisting of lots of shades of blue, an earth colour schemed crystal ball bracelet, ripped skinny jeans, and a sleeping with sirens band bracelet. after taking photos for journal reference and so i don’t forget anything when i wear it, i found a plain black zip up jacket. i took a few pins off my backpack and added them to the pockets and neck piece/line.

they consisted of: a saw pin, a paper clip with the gay flag on [again, not even really because i’m gay - i just love the colours, a paper clip with a black stone/crystal sphere attatched, a pin implying taxidermy, a kellin quinn pin, and a pentagram pin. i tried it on, and maybe it’s just because of the general heat [although i tried it on at night and my room dosent have a working radiator or anything] but it warms me up almost immediately. which is great because i haven’t worn a coat since i started dressing alt and im always cold. i did all of the above while listening to my new evanescence cd — my favourite song from the album hasnt changed, its imaginary. afterwards i went out to the kitchen table and sat with boris.

my sister suddenly [i say suddenly, she’s always like this - which is why it’s so draining.] started screaming at the top of her lungs and jumping and punching the floor [the ceiling above the kitchen] and it was terrifying boris and archie. boris was already panicking, and then it set off the dog because he must’ve thought someone was dying. it was deafening. i went upstairs, frustrated, because she genuinely acts like she dosent share a house with anyone else and screams while gaming everyday; despite also being told to quiet down everyday. she also knows how loud she’s being, and how sound sensitive me and the animals are. anyway, i asked her to be quiet because she’s scaring boris [in an slight angry tone, because it was angering. but not like, anywhere near shouting.] and she replied with something along the lines of ‘no im not, and i don’t care.’

i told her to stop again and she shook her head and continued speaking to whoever she was playing a game with. i just said her name, again, implying for her to stop and she smirked and started waving at me. i said ‘what is wrong with you?’, she told me she hates me, and i walked off. then i cried for like 30mins because i felt guilty about saying that. i’m just really sick and tired of my cat, who lives here, feeling scared in his own home because of her. aswell as me, i also feel on edge here because of the whole screaming thing, and how angry she gets over it when she’s told to shut her door or quiet down. [shutting doors dosent make a difference though, as our house is from the 1800s and the walls are paper thin.] i carried on accompanying boris and made a couple of gerard way gifs at 11.

i went into my room for a split second and when i came back i saw that boris was sitting in corner beside the doorway of the kitchen. which i immediately thought was really weird, and then i saw that he’d been sick. i called my dad because i don’t know how to clean stuff like that up from our old floors and tried my best to comfort him. he wasn’t really having it, which makes sense because he obviously couldn’t have been feeling good. it was a hairball, thankfully [and unkthankfully, of course], most likely due to him licking/biting out lots of his hair because of the bugs from outside getting on him. my mum will be giving him treatment for it soon, it’s just always trouble when its applied, because he gets very agitated and one he runs away, your not getting another chance. and if you do get through to him and apply the treatment, you can’t really fuss him for over a day.

which is such an obstacle for me because i try my best to spend a lot, if not all, of my free time with him. he kept on wanting to go outside afterwards, so i left him to his own devices as he was still quite skittish over being around anyone. at 12:20 i was in my room after checking if he wanted to come in, when i decided i was gunna nap. i slept on and off for 10 minutes before my mum came back from being out with her friend. i napped again, this time on and off for 15-20 minutes. she came back once id woken up and let boris in with her. he straight away had something to eat at the bowls outside my room’s door and was purring. my mum told me that it was raining outside so i felt terrible that id accidentally left him out there while i slept. hopefully he managed to get under my dads car/the bit over the front door but he was clearly wet.

i attempted to fuss him and apologise. i spoke to my mum about why i think he’s not okay and then got the yes to coming up and doing the questions. on the way upstairs, boris followed me round the living room and onto the living room table. he put his head back for me to stroke it and purred again. which sort of gave me the idea that he was/is feeling better, which i hope with every part of me is the case. upon going up to ask the questions, my sister got into a huge heated argument with my parents over some update that’s coming to one of the game she plays tomorrow. she said that it’s being released at 4am our [UK] time.

my mum said my sister could put an alarm on her phone, but she said that it won’t wake her up and started begging my parents to wake up at 4 to get her up. they said no and she started screaming and everything. she finally went into her room after my dad looked it up and found out it’s allegedly happening at 9, so she got her phone back for 10 minutes to put on another alarm and tell her friend that the original time is most likely wrong. i started doing my questions after my sister agreed she wouldn’t disrupt them and everything would still be okay, even though she’s not supposed to be awake when i do things like this. mainly because of change in routine.

i started doing my questions and she came into my parents room and i had to stop. she eventually left after kind of verifying that didn’t mess everything up and i finished doing my questions. i actually managed to get downstairs at 2:25, so that’s also when i finished them. it took longer that it should’ve because of the really long argument and after boris being sick, i had even more reasons to believe he isn’t okay. and, my parents didn’t ask me to do them until quite late. i went on to pour myself some icy water, feed boris, do my teeth, and then say goodnight to boris.

i showed him what i’d done today and fed him his treats like always. he was purring like crazy throughout the whole time i was speaking to him which made me feel really relaxed. i finished at an unknown time [i thought i logged it but apparently not] and went to sleep at 4:10.

🗝️ — boris/my cat, archie/immediate family’s dog, questions [about boris]/i ask my parents questions about my cat to verify he’s okay + will be okay in the morning. its a compulsive thing and i’m hopefully going to be tested for OCD in the future.

have a good day/night O_o

[vinniehackedmyheart]

You’re the exception - Vinnie Hacker Imagine.

summary: vinnie hates everyone but you

warnings: cursing, based on a scene in the Hype House on Netflix.

requested: no

-

You were sat around the kitchen counter with Mia and Thomas discussing new things for the house and how you can help, preferring to stay on their good side and film a few tiktok’s instead of doing nothing like certain people.

“I think we should go to one of those anger rooms that were a big thing a few months ago? That would be a fun thing we could do with everyone and the fans would love it” you say to the couple with a pen clutched between your fingers and a notepad between your elbows as you lean on the cool marble counter top.

Thomas scratches his chin in thought for a moment before opening his mouth to speak. “That would be quite fun actually, we can rent out a place for an hour or two and film a few tiktok’s as well as some youtube content.

“Get good click bait with it too” Thomas jokes at the end but his smile is wiped from his face when he sees the scowl you give him.

“i’ve always wanted to do that too and it’s something everyone would be interest in, like obviously we know the boys would and Kouvr too. Vinnie in particular might enjoy this more.” Mia says in thought and you smile slightly at the thought of Vinnie.

He and you have a really close bond, the both of you choosing to stay out of drama and youtube click bait. You share interests a lot and you both aren’t too keen on social media, not to mention you also love cats. So, no one would be surprised if you admitted to your feelings for him, but no one can know.

You feel bad for him recently as people in house won’t leave him alone for not leaving his room but you guess it can’t be too easy for him, given his fan base their isn’t much content that they will appeal to.

“Yeah exactly, it will be good for him to blow off some steam” you say.

“for all of us” Mia raises her eyebrows suggestively and you laugh slightly, referring to the recent drama with thomas and chase.

“who to blow off steam?” Michael says as he walks in.

you secretly roll your eyes at his voice, fed up with him for his comments made about your best friend last night.

“so writing that down?” you question thomas, choosing to ignore the arrogant male a few metres away from you.

“writing that down” the brunette affirms and you click your pen before adding your idea to the list.

Michael reaches into the fridge to pull out some juice before resting against the counter.

Thomas and him converse for a few moments while you rub your temples trying to brainstorm content for the house but also your tiktok, before you all hear some footsteps.

The people in the room go slightly quite as they wait for the arrival before sharing greetings with the man himself, Vinnie Hacker.

You smile sweetly at him and he goes to smile at you back before Michael pipes up from his spot.

“Oh look who’s come out of their room” He chastises to which causes a pretty furrow to nestle between your best friends eyebrows.

“What the f@ck is that supposed to mean?” Vinnie says throwing his hands up stiffly into a half shrug.

“Well you just aren’t out with us a lot man” Michael says, his voice still laced with self-entitlement to which you cringe at. “

“I heard about last nights dinner, no clue why you had to whine about me to everyone else instead of just not being a little bitch and saying it to my face?”

Vinnie says condescendingly, making you smile secretly.

You becoming proud of him for sticking up for himself now instead of being to quiet humble guy you love in the corner trying to keep peace all the time.

“You just aren’t here man whenever we ask you to be in tiktoks with us you bring that denial every time” Michael says, still not backing down.

“and with that attitude you wonder why? I’m f@cking pissed bro” Vinnie says before turning around and walking away.

“Vinnie-” Thomas starts but Vin sticks his middle finger up and carries on.

Everyone stays silent for a moment before you interrupt.

“i’m going to go and see if he’s alright” you say sharply, scowling at Michael as you briskly walk out.

You continue up the stairs of the mansion and down a few corridors before coming around Vinnies closed door.

You gather yourself for a moment before knocking a few times and stepping back.

All you hear is silence.

“Vin it’s me, may i come in?” you say hoping he changes his mind and let’s you enter once he knows it’s you.

Of course Vinnie recognises your voice and gets up from his slumped position on his bed to open the door for you.

You release a nervous breath of relief when he opens it and you immediately feel intoxicated my his strong cologne.

You stay quiet as you enter the room before shutting his bedroom door as he goes back to his position of lying face first on his bed, he head turned to the side to watch you.“i’m sorry” you say leaning back on your arm so you are slightly closer to him.

“perhaps i should’nt of told you what” you start but vinnie cuts you off, stretching his arm out to tap your hand that’s the closest to him.

You walk over and take a seat on the corner of his bed, slightly apprehensive on where you stand, literally and figuratively.

You are usually in his room keeping each other comfortable in the house but never when he’s been angry like this.

“no you should have, i’m glad you did. It shows someone has my back in here” he says in his deep, grumbling voice as he rubs his finger back and force over the back of your hand making your stomach erupt subtly with warmth.

“Always Vin, you know that” you say matching his quiet tone.

He stays silent for a moment before beckoning you over to him with a pat on the space of the bed next to him. “come here”.

You move yourself so you are lying on your back, your face turner to look at him as he rolls onto his side with an elbow holding his face up and an arm just a few inches from your waist.

“You know if you ever need me to be with you when you don’t want to display your feelings, unlike me, then you can just ask. I’m always here for you” he says after a moment of silence just staring at your face adoringly.

“i know” you whisper, feeling so comfortable now that you don’t feel the need to talk loudly.

he smiles before lifting his free hand and tucking some hair behind your ear.

“I appreciate you always helping me when i’m feeling like this you know, i don’t think i tell you how much it means to me to have someone like you in this house enough” he whispers back to you.

you mull over his words for a few moments in your head before rolling onto your side to face him, his hand moving to cup the cheek that isn’t in one of his pillows.

He holds you so gently. “me too” you say to him, leaning into his warm embrace.

he stares at your eyes before they drift to your lips, which are now open with a slight inaudible gasp.

he rubs your cheek with his thumb softly. “may i kiss you?” he says gently making you want to kiss him a million times over his face.

“please” you mumble with a soft laugh which he reciprocates before leaving in and kissing you so softly it almost makes you want to cry.

When he pulls away the both of you have to biggest smiles on your faces as your eyes meet.

“i’ve been wanting to do that for so long now” he says making you nod in agreement before settling in his open arms.

You let your breathing even out as he presses gentle kisses to your head as he hold you close to him, thankful he can finally show his appreciation for you in the way he’s always wanted to.

-

hey!! that was my first imagine so let me know how it was!! my requests are open and please reblog <3

[cowboyjen68]

hi there! i just found your blog and it truly puts a smile on my face and gives me hope. after years of repressing my sexuality i finally came to terms with being a lesbian aaand then i had to move home from college due to covid :/ my parents are mostly cool but my mom in the past has expressed discomfort around/about lesbians, even hearing her say that word sounds dirty to me. (i’m not out to her either) i haven’t had the courage to call myself a lesbian out loud to anyone yet because of the negative connotations i’ve associated with “lesbian” over my 22 years. do you have any advice on how to not hate “lesbian”? i rly want to like it but idk where to start

I am sooo sorry this took a while. First, congrats on seeing yourself, even if only you know. The cool thing about being a lesbian is only you need to be okay with it. The opinions of others are unimportant. You just are.

Likely your mom is less comfortable with actual lesbians and more uncomfortable with the why "lesbian" is used by men, in porn and how it is treated in the media. She is probably my age the the 80's and 90's were full of movies where lesbians were either there for the sake of men or as a joke (or both). The lesbian sidekick is a time honored comedy trick and can be funny, but it can also be gross if they are playing to men's comfort/gaze.

It took me over a year after coming out to use "lesbian" when referring to myself. I came out to Mom and Dad by saying I was gay and I used gay or "I like girls" to come out to others. What really helped me was my growing lesbian friend group. They introduced me to lesbians of all types and they unapologetically used lesbian (or dyke) out loud, in public, on shirts and in daily conversations. I had no problem saying "my lesbians friends" but when it came to myself I practically choked on the work. I am a" lllless......gay.. I am gay".

They cheered me on. Told me to love "lesbian" because basically, all those other people using it as a dirty word (ie men) can Fuck off. It is ours, it is who we are and "lesbian" is how we find each other and forge a powerful community. 

One older friend (and unintentional mentor) told me to practice in the mirror. And I did. I would walk through the apartment I shared with my gay man friend and say LESBIAN!! He would occasionally shout "I KNOW JEN" or "Yeah.. we all know JEN!". And that actually helped. Knowing that me NOT saying it was not going to change the fact that others know so why not own it?

I shot a tiktok about it because it is a universal experience to feel a disconnect from the word lesbians, or even outright distain for it. That is the affect of a society that hates that men have ZERO bearing on our sexuality. They  have no part in it. NONE. Men are not used to being left out. Many woman don’t realize it, lesbians included, that we are conditioned to make men comfortable and our sexuality in itself makes men so uncomfortable that they can ONLY sexualize us. So we hear lesbian used either as whispers in mixed company or in the context of a sexual act only. 

BUT you and I and other lesbians know,.. we are so much more than the act of sex. That our sexuality is beautiful and deep, it is powerful and  is part of our very fiber. Every thing we do is affected by being a lesbian and I would not change that.  

Say it.. You said it to me.. To those on my blog, even if we don’t know who you are. That is a step. Take your time. Refer to yourself as a lesbian in your head. Sounds silly but it works. You don’t have to rush to use it in public, but once you do you can begin to really find your community. 

Find lesbian friends. Let them surround you with lesbian positivity. Follow me on TikTok. I use lesbian so much my kids tease me. Hearing it in a healthy and happy way helps a lot. 

I am stubbornly lesbian. I don’t use any other word to describe my sexuality.

 I worked hard to love THAT part of me which is actually all of me and I am too important, my lesbians friends, community and future community are too important to ever be vague again.

[kindahoping4forever]

Yes, Sir // Ashton Irwin

This is definitely the fastest turnaround I’ve ever had for a piece of writing 🤡. Yesterday @spicycal​ sent me a TikTok of Ashton reacting to being called “sir” and as you can imagine, the inspo machine started turning for a lot of us. Pretty quickly, I jokingly pitched a premise to @pxrxmoore @cashtonasfuck and @feliznavidaddycal that served as a sequel to the fic I had just posted, You Were Digging Plants, I Dug You. The more I thought about it though, the more I liked the idea so I ran with it and here we are. Thank you to @cal-puddies for as always, reassuring me I was on the right track and to the anons who excitedly messaged me in anticipation for it. (And to @rebelwith0utacause for implying my writing was worth losing sleep over.)

Warnings: Boyfriend!Ash, Gardening!Ash, Home Repair!Ash, Dom!Ash (we love a multi-faceted man), references to bondage and cumplay, brief degrading language, sex in a public place, unprotected sex in an established relationship

Word Count: 3750

Masterlist // Taglist // Ko-Fi

Let  me  know  what  you  think!

————-

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were proud of what you’ve done,” Ashton accuses you with a smirk.

You drop your jaw in mock offense. “What I’ve done?! Ohhhhh, that’s right, that was my other boyfriend’s dick I was bouncing on that day. I’m sorry, baby, you’re correct. This was entirely my fault,” you offer with pouted lips, opening your arms for a cuddle.

“You were a woman possessed and your frenzied demon sex destroyed my relaxation zone,” he teases, pulling you in to first bite and then kiss your pout.

It had been a week since your spontaneous romp had ended in the untimely demise of Ash’s beloved hammock. He hadn’t let you hear the end of it since it happened and now the two of you were finally back outside, assessing the damage.

“I think I have a fabric patch kit in the garage but the framing is definitely fucked,” he mutters, picking over the pieces. “Gonna need new hooks… new spreader bar…”

“Been talking about getting one of those anyways,” you joke with a twinkle in your eye.

He gives you a look and shakes his head. “Jesus, already with you?”

You giggle and raise your arms in surrender. “I’m sorry, Ash, I honestly hate that I’m that girl but the manly man ‘lemme get my tools out and work with my hands’ act just does things for me.”

“Are you sure you want to go with me to get the supplies or are you gonna spontaneously combust right when we walk in the hardware store?” He teases, standing behind you and snaking his arms around your waist. “And you’re not that girl, you’re my girl.”

“Nice save,” you comment dryly and wiggle away from him; he chuckles warmly and you both walk back to the house.

While you’re getting ready to go, Ashton gets caught up taking notes on the hammock repair videos he’s found on YouTube so you end up heading out later than either of you intended. The home improvement store isn’t far but it’s LA so there’s still traffic and the car ride has a slightly tense air because of it.

You can tell how irritated he is by the way he’s relentlessly drumming his fingers on the steering wheel as you sit in the standstill traffic. You reach out and take his hand, both to calm him and to stop the noise. He looks at you appreciatively and gestures at the line of cars in front of him with his other hand. “40 minutes to go five fuckin’ miles,” he grumbles. “There’s no way this is getting done today, the sun’s gonna be goin’ down before we even leave the goddamn store.”

You kiss the back of his hand that’s tightly squeezing yours. “I told you, I’ll help you with everything tomorrow,” you remind him reassuringly. “It’s not a big deal, just relax, baby.”

“You know what would help me relax?” He turns to you with a smirk. “If I could go home and lay in a fuckin’ hammock.”

You finally arrive at your destination and enter the store. After his YouTube deep dive, Ash decided he should install wooden posts to hang the hammock on since your sexcapade uprooted the metal stand’s legs straight out of the ground. He heads over to visit the lumber department and you decide to browse through the garden center, thinking that if you pick out some new seeds for him, it might put a smile on his face.

Ash returns to you less than 10 minutes later, looking more agitated than ever. You raise your eyebrows to him as a silent question and he huffs, “They just happened to have sold out of what I need. Gotta order it, won’t be here until next week.”

You give him a sympathetic frown and rub his back. “I’m sorry I broke your oasis center or whatever you called it earlier,” you say, trying to lighten the mood.

He cracks a smile and starts browsing the seed packs in front of you. “I called it my relaxation zone and I’m sure I’ll forgive you someday.”

You two linger in the garden section, pointing out vegetables that could be helpful to have on hand and having a mild disagreement over which flowers would look best growing next to his sunflowers. 

“My phone is dying and I need it for my shopping list, baby, can you Google and see if we can plant marigolds right now?” He asks, turning a packet of seeds over in his hands.

You pull your phone out of your back pocket, happy to see that he’s calmed down and is interested in making the most of this trip. You chirp emphatically, “Yes, sir.”

Ashton hears your response and lets out a sharp, raspy exhale that you’ve never quite heard before and he immediately tries to disguise it as a cough. You glance over at him curiously but he appears to be intensely examining the package he’s holding so you move on.

“Depends on what type but these ones you can plant through the summer, so we’re good,” you inform him, pointing to the seeds he’s holding.

“Cool,” he breezes and tosses them into your shopping cart. “What about... basil?”

“Yes, sir,” you say again, fingers adeptly typing. You hear a similar noise come from him, though he deals with it much better this second time. You’re sure this wasn’t coincidental this time and you peer at him over your phone to see his jaw clenching in a way you’re very familiar with. Interesting.

“I’m just seeing ‘warm weather’... maybe just get one pack to try?” You suggest, eyeing him, trying to figure out if what you suspect is going on is really going on.

He shrugs, “Couldn’t hurt.” He flings the packet into the cart and moves down the aisle.

Ashton tosses out a few more things for you to look up and while you’re happy to help, you’re also glad for the opportunity to test the theory you now have. You vary your affirmations to him and as you suspect, “Yes, sir” is the only one that seems to get a reaction out of him.

The garden center is located outside and the afternoon sun is just starting to hit the area you’re shopping in. You notice Ash has begun to sweat and if you weren’t in a mood before, you absolutely are now, so you decide to rile him a bit more.  

“That sun is brutal!” You start, dramatically fanning yourself. “You’re lookin’ a little warm too, handsome… unless there’s another reason why you’d be sweating.”

He looks at you incredulously and you stare back innocently, eyes wide and shining; he stares you down as he briskly takes off his black button down shirt, leaving him in a white tank. 

“Are you good or does the sight of any bare flesh in the presence of gardening paraphernalia have you needing to excuse yourself?” He fires back, whipping his shirt into the basket pointedly, glare challenging you to push your luck.

You smile sweetly and answer, “Oh, I’m feeling just fine. But thank you… sir.”

Mischievous grin on your face, you start to make your way to the end of the aisle, scooting your body between him and the shopping cart. Sure, you could’ve gone around the other side but that wouldn’t have given you the opportunity to graze your ass against his crotch to confirm - yep - he’s losing the battle he’s fighting with his cock and he is definitely harder than he wants to be right now.

As you pass by, his large hand grabs your wrist and wraps around it tightly. “Watch it,” is all he says but the low tone he uses mixed with the feeling of his hot breath on your neck has your head spinning.

You lay off your teasing for a while but if you’re being honest, you both seem to enjoy the charged air lingering between the two of you now. Ashton grabs your waist to move you out of his way so that he can look at a display and his fingers dig into your skin just a little too hard, causing you to gasp sharply. You stop to read a tag on the bottom shelf and just happen to catch his gaze as you lick your lips, on your knees in front of him; you hear him curse under his breath as he turns away, adjusting himself.

The cat and mouse game continues and judging by the hiss you get out of him the third time you “accidentally” bump his crotch, you’ve pushed it as far as you can; you know you’re probably in for a long night when you get home but maybe that’s what he needs to take his mind off of how frustrated he is with this project. Or at least that’s what you tell yourself. It’s also quite fun.

You leave the garden section, cart full of various treasures, and start to head for the checkout. “Wait, baby,” Ashton calls out and you stop. “I wanna get a couple of the things I need for the hammock so when I come back for the wood I can just pop in and out of here.” 

He directs you to an area towards the back of the store; you follow him and wheel the cart down an aisle that’s filled with boxes of metal hooks and chains. He sees your eyes taking in the aisle and he makes a face at you. “Whatever obnoxiously horny crack you’re about to make, just do it now so you can help me look for what I need,” he says in faux exasperation, making a “come on” gesture with his hand.

You laugh genuinely, “I don’t have anything to say!” You walk down the aisle and peer into a few of the boxes on the shelves. “I do wonder if we might get a better price on some of these things at one of the other types of stores we frequent,” you say under your breath.

He ignores your remark and starts consulting the notes on his phone. He scans the selection of items and finds the types of hooks he needs, throwing them into your basket. He furrows his brow, unable to find the next thing on his list. 

“What are you looking for, babe? Let me help,” you ask, eager to speed things up.

“We need this,” He states, standing next to you to show you a picture of chains on his phone. 

You examine the photo and quip suggestively, “Yeah we do.”

He lands a light swat on your ass and you squeak. “Your jokes are gonna seem a lot less funny if you keep it up,” he warns quietly in your ear.

You look around and see that this section of the store is more or less deserted. Feeling emboldened by this discovery, you reach to palm him over his jeans. “Yes, sir,” you nonchalantly reply.

The words have barely left your mouth and his hand is already back around your wrist and dragging you to follow him down the aisle. Your logical mind says you should protest that his shirt, your sweater and all your intended purchases are being left in the cart unattended but the decidedly less rational section of your brain, the part that just told you to grab your boyfriend’s dick in the middle of a home improvement store, kind of wants to see where this goes.

You get your answer seconds later when he pulls you into a bathroom tucked away next to the employee break room; it’s small, only a couple of sinks and stalls, and looks infrequently used. Which is probably for the best because Ash does not appear to have any interest in taking you into a stall, at least not just yet.

He presses you up against the door, kissing you deeply with a bruising intensity. He pulls away and you gasp. “You’ve been acting up all day, sweetheart, you can’t be surprised we’ve ended up here.” His hand, large enough to reach across your entire face, grips your chin and turns you to look at him. “Is this what you’ve been aiming for, is this what you hoped would happen?”

His tone is harsh and his words threatening but his eyes glimmer with mischief, desire and excitement. You’re sure the look in your eyes matches his when you unflinchingly answer with a confident, “Yes. Sir.”

He smiles widely and leans in, kissing, nipping and sucking harshly at your neck. You groan against him, involuntarily, and then quickly wonder how thin this bathroom’s walls are and you start trying to recall if you saw anybody in the break room next door.

Ashton pulls back to admire his work on your neck and sees your concerned expression. His face softens for a minute and he asks you, “You remember your word, baby?”

You flash him a brief tender smile, appreciating how attentive he is, that he would pick up on even your briefest moment of apprehension. You nod enthusiastically and then your smile turns devilish as you think to once again answer, “Yes, sir.”

He hooks his fingers in your waistband and yanks you from the door, spinning you around and then pressing your chest into it. You hold your breath and brace yourself for the spank you’re certain is coming but it never does. You’re not sure if you’re disappointed but the way your core is throbbing hints that you probably are.

Instead of smacking your ass, Ash is rutting up against it, breath heavy against your neck, giving you goosebumps. “Feel this, baby? You knew what you were doing out there, you just couldn’t help yourself, could you? Gave you my cock this morning and you’re still begging for it, aren’t you?”

You bite your lip and wiggle against him, enjoying the feeling of his hard bulge pressing into you. “Yes, sir.”

Before you even realize he’s pulled away, that hard smack you’d been waiting for comes down on your ass and you cry out in surprise.

"That’s for being smart.” He presses his body roughly up against yours again and shoves his hand down your shorts, dragging his fingers through your folds, humming at the wetness he discovers there. “We’re on a fuckin’ shopping trip and you’re this wet for me? Even more desperate than I thought… and believe me, you were already very desperate in my mind.”

Ashton yanks his hand out of your shorts and pulls you away from the door, unceremoniously pushing you towards the sink counter. “Off,” he commands, gesturing to your bottoms. There’s not a lock on the bathroom door so he drags the metal trash can in front of the door, wedging it somewhat under the handle. “We already know you clearly can’t keep quiet, can’t have anyone barging in here to see who’s demeaning themself in the bathroom,” he taunts. “That’s only for me to see.”

You and Ash used to play like this all the time when you first got together but lately you’d gotten so caught up in your bubble of domestic bliss, it had fallen by the wayside. Things weren’t boring or unadventurous by any means but it’d been a minute since your last risky public romp or use of any degradation. Combining the two, plus the thrill of jumping back in after so long? Heavenly.

You hop up on the counter in your panties, shedding your tank top and spreading your legs, inviting him closer. “Yes, sir,” you tease with a sultry smile. “I’m your slut, no one else’s.”

He walks over and settles between your legs, kissing you hungrily as he unzips his pants and takes his cock out. “That’s right,” he growls. “Love hearing you say that… In fact, think I want you to see that too.” 

He grabs you down off your perch and spins you to face the mirror lining the sink, your hands fly out to brace yourself as he presses you up against the counter, kicking your legs apart. He makes quick work of tugging your panties down your legs and then reaching over to jerk the cups of your bra down. You watch your reflection as he exposes more of your body to himself and now to you; you don’t even process your nakedness, your only thought is of how blown your pupils look.

Ashton lines himself up and pushes his cock inside you and begins thrusting roughly. You were undoubtedly turned on but the stretch is still a lot and you find yourself gasping and white-knuckling the counter at the sensation. 

He sees your eyes start to close and he yanks your hair to get your attention. “I said I want you to see what a slut you are,” he breathes, already struggling to control himself. “Want you to see what I see, want you to see what everyone is gonna see if that door stop doesn’t hold up and someone comes in here and finds me giving you what you’ve been needing so badly.”

You whimper quietly at his words, at the thought of being caught. “Yes, sir… I love seeing how I look with your cock inside me…” You pant, “I already look so fucked out and we’ve barely started… I just wanted it so much.”

He slaps your ass again and the already loud smack sounds even louder given your setting. “We’re only at this fucking store today because we had to solve a problem created by your greedy little pussy and now that we’re here? You can’t even act right for a couple hours, got me hard looking at fucking flowers, now I’m having to bend you over in a fucking bathroom? How embarrassing,” he rasps at you through gritted teeth.

You love when he’s like this, you feel like you could almost cum from his words alone; you know it’s risking setting him off but you reach down and start rubbing your clit, you can’t help it. Ash immediately notices and laughs darkly. “Aww, baby, that time already? Go ahead and make yourself cum, sugar, the faster that needy pussy gets satisfied, the faster I can get on with my fucking day… until you’re back to begging me for it when we get home, of course.”

You’re aggressively meeting his thrusts now, throwing yourself back on him with pleasure being your only concern. You’d love to respond to his teasing with some sass of your own, rile him up some more but he’s hitting inside you just right and the only thing you can think to do is moan.

Seconds after you let out a particularly long moan, you notice voices can faintly be heard on the other side of the door, a pair of employees walking through the hallway. You catch Ashton’s gaze in the mirror and you can see the question in his eyes, letting you decide if you want to stop; you surprise yourself with how little you care and you stare at his reflection as you bounce yourself against him and rub your clit faster.

An amused smile paints his face and he whispers, “Starting to think you might want everyone to know what a slut you are for me. Is that what you want, baby?” His fingers dig into your skin as he drives his hips relentlessly into yours.

To keep from crying out, you bite your lip hard enough you’re almost sure you’re breaking the skin. You manage to gasp out, “Yes, sir,” before your orgasm completely takes your breath away.

The combination of you cumming around him and your breathless use of that phrase finally does Ash in and he thrusts into you only a few more times before his cock starts pumping you full of cum. Those voices outside the door are still somewhat present and you watch his reflection as he tries not to make a sound, fascinated by the way his jaw almost seems to be clenching in time with the pulsing of your pussy.

You both stand at the sink, catching your breath for a good minute, reality slowly starting to fade back in. You close your eyes and open them again, giggling once your mind finally starts to process the sight of yourself tits out, bottomless and bent over a bathroom sink in a hardware store.

Ashton smiles at the sound of your laughter and pulls out of you, hurriedly reaching for a handful of paper towels to help you clean up before things get too messy.

You accept his help and wryly ask, “You’re not gonna do the whole ‘no, put your panties back on, want you to feel my cum dripping out of you until we get home’ thing?”

He looks at you with amusement in his eyes and replies, “Gross, babe, we still have to go through checkout and everything. Jesus.”

You snort and pull him into you, kissing him sweetly before you both start the process of making yourselves and the bathroom look like nothing happened. 

You manage to exit both the bathroom and the store without anyone catching on; you notice he’s in a much lighter mood and much more affectionate and touchy than he was earlier. You like it.

There’s traffic on the drive home but it doesn’t seem to bother either one of you; you’re excitedly chatting about the purchases you made and trying to decide what to order for dinner.

There’s a lull in the conversation and you can’t fight the urge to comment, “So… you definitely can’t tease me anymore for getting turned on by home improvement because I’m pretty sure you’re not gonna be able to visit that store without getting just a little bit hard now.”

The giggle Ash lets out fills the car and it’s the best sound you’ve heard all day. “I think whatever sex demon possessed you last week got to me,” he shakes his head in disbelief. “I literally had to stop myself from eating my cum out of you. That’s how far gone I was.”

You playfully jab his side. “I can’t even get you to do that at home and you’re trying to do it in a public bathroom? And we call me the slut in this relationship.”

He laughs again and squeezes your thigh affectionately. “Well… we have fun, don’t we?”

You place your hand on top of his, turn to him and grin. “Yes, sir.”

—-

My tag list is breaking my posts atm so apologies if you get tagged more than once/don’t get tagged at all while I figure out what the problem is!

—-

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[stones-x-bones]

Classic Blunder || Ben and Bex

TIMING: Current PARTIES: @professorbcampbell and @inbextween SUMMARY: Ben finds Bex reading alone in the hallway and decides she’s quite a remarkable find. CONTENT: Brief Domestic Abuse mention

Being back at school was a strange feeling. Bex was eager to be back, she did love learning after all, but the strangeness of it came from sitting through hour long lectures about modern law and criminal justice systems, because despite trying to convince herself that she could still do this, she really didn’t want to be doing this. There was a meager acceptance as she sulked through her mandatory classes of the day, only to give herself the gifts of her electives-- A Timeline Of History Before Humans and, of course, Professor Beck’s class, Our Monsters, Ourselves: Recognizing the Other in Speculative Literature-- after them. She always came away feeling refreshed from them, especially now more so that she was living at Morgan’s. Going home to a place that didn’t feel...suffocating was nicer than Bex had ever imagined. But, that still left a lingering fear in her-- because, ultimately, she’d have to go home one day. And it was probably going to have to be someday soon. So perhaps the strangeness was more a feeling of bittersweet, because despite the bruises now fading on her skin, and the cuts closing up, the things that brought her joy also reminded her of the fact that they would not last. They simply could not. 

Morgan’s class had ended a while ago, but Bex still lingered in the hallway. She was reading one of the books she’d borrowed from Morgan’s library, about Ancient History and how the stories of the past influence modern literature. There was only one bench in the hallway and she’d curled up on it, letting the masses of students wander by, not paying much attention to them and they paid little attention to her. But she remained even after the halls had cleared and more classes had started, lost in her book. She didn’t even notice the footsteps in the hallway, or the man approaching her.

Shutting his attache case with a final sigh, Ben stood up from his desk and shut the door to his office. It had been a long day of grading, office hours, and a department meeting, but it was worth it in the end. Making the right appearances, maintaining a good work flow, ensuring that his end of semester feedback responses were just where they needed to be-- it was all a balancing act. And it was an act he excelled at. Locking the door behind him, Ben made his way through the winding hallways of his building towards the exit. As he made his way through the halls, his forehead creased as caught sight of a young woman lost in a book. “I hope you don’t have a class to be going to,” Ben commented loudly, slowing to a halt in front of the girl. “Not that I’d tell on you-- this isn’t high school, after all.” He said with a conspiratorial grin. “What are you reading?”

Bex nearly jumped out of her skin when the man spoke, snapping her book shut out of reflex. She looked up at him, trying to shake off the jitters that had suddenly crawled into her hands. “O-oh, no! I don’t! I just got out of class, I pro--” she stopped herself mid sentence and shook her head, “I just got done with my last class of the day, I just like, you know, the atmosphere here sometimes cause it gets real quiet and there’s usually no one around in the halls, so reading is easy, but I--” she needed to take a breath, to calm down-- “sorry. Sometimes I talk a lot when I get nervous. Not that I’m nervous! You just kind of...caught me off guard.” But he didn’t seem too perturbed by her frantic rambling and he looked like one of the nicer professors, unlike most of the ones who had permanent furrows in their brows. She looked down at the book in her hands. “Oh, um…” held it up to him, “it’s something Professor Beck lent to me. A-about the history of storytelling and how it influences modern literature and media. Do you, um, know her? Professor Beck? Are you in the lit department, too?”

Slipping his hand into the pocket of his trousers, Ben listened to her ramble with a patient smile on his face. She was one of those students. The anxious, over-eager, not yet self-assured children. Ripe for the picking. And his little gatherings, they were long overdue for a fresh face, for fresh blood. “I was only joking, I’m sorry for making you nervous.” He said with a laugh and apologetic shrug that he didn’t mean. “Or rather-- not nervous.” Ben corrected himself. Watching as she held up the book, his eyes flicked across the cover. It seemed… exactly like the kind of drivel Bitchy Fucking Beck would have in her personal collection. Modern literature and media-- what sort of study was that? Were her students analyzing movies? Or, he shuddered to think, TikToks? Disgusting. But, his expression remained politely intrigued, “Ah yes, Morgan and I are well acquainted. And no, I’m not a member of the literature department, but we work within the same college. I’m a professor of the Classics and not,” Ben let out a wry chuckle, “Literary classics. I teach Greek and Roman classics. I’m sure your book includes some references to the old mythologies and tales from back then.”

“Oh, no, it’s okay! Really! It was mostly my fault. I’m really bad at paying attention, sometimes. Especially when I’m reading a book.” Bex gave her best attempt at a reassuring smile, finding that innate part of her that needed to please adults surfacing again. She perked up a bit when he mentioned knowing Professor Beck. “You are? She’s great, don’t you think? I mean, I’m kind of struggling in her class, but it’s because I’m really bad at creative writing and critical analysis of literature, but I enjoy it! It’s interesting and I like learning new things.” She watched him eye the book before setting it down in her lap again, fiddling with the cover. “Oh, you teach the classics? That’s so cool. I’ve always been interested in studying them academically. I’ve read a lot of books on them-- like, a lot-- but I’ve never taken a class for it! And um, it sort of does, obviously! Story-telling was often used as the only means to pass on history and culture and it was such a large part of both the Greek’s and Roman’s society. I know it’s kind of typical, for people to enjoy Greek mythology, but there’s a reason it’s so popular. But, um, I don’t really have to tell you that, do I?” She chewed her lip anxiously. “Sorry, uh-- I’m Bexley, by the way.” Stood up, holding her hand out. “Professional rambler.” 

“Nothing wrong with getting lost in a good book,” Ben said with a nod, “I’m guilty of that particular crime myself.” Among other, actual crimes. But, that was neither here nor there. Watching the way her eyes seemed to light up at the mention of Beck, Ben offered a reassuring smile. She was one of these foolish children who preferred fiction to fact, hm? But, as the girl continued to speak, perhaps, he thought, not. “Ah, regardless of performance, the pursuit of knowledge is a wonderful thing. That’s why we’re all here, right?” He said. Listening patiently as the girl’s words took on a meandering, if anxious, quality, Ben regarded her with a practiced eye. She was young, she hardly looked old enough to order a drink. There was a nervous anxiety that practically bubbled over from within her-- he could see it in the way she played with her book, how she bit her lip, the skittish way she moved. Interesting, very interesting. “Oh no, I’m always happy to hear what fellow lovers of the classics have to say.” He said and shook her hand firmly, a broad smile on his face. “Ben Campbell. Professional Rambler of the Classics. If you ever have the misfortune of attending one of my classes, I can assure you, I have you beat in the rambling department.”

“Oh, do you like reading books, too? What kind? Do you have your own library? Professor Beck has a huge library at her place. She lets me pick whatever I want to read.” Bex gave the professor a genuine grin as he took her hand to shake. He had a firm grip, and she remembered all the times her father told her a man could be judged by how firm his handshake was. She still didn’t understand what that meant. “I’m trying my best, and, really, that’s all I can do right now, right?” Even if that fact still made her feel poorly. She hoped her inability to keep the waver from her voice wasn’t a dead giveaway. She shook it off and readjusted. “Nice to meet you, Professor Campbell! And, well, I mean-- who wouldn’t ramble about the Classics? There’s a lot to say about them, and a lot to, you know-- know.” She wasn’t sure she was making too much sense anymore, but the lack of sleep was getting to her. She really needed to sleep. Rubbing her eyes, she looked around the empty hallway. “Have you taught here long? This is my first year at UMWC so I don’t know a lot of the professors. Or a lot of the staff. Or...students.” She knew Mina, and she knew some of the weird kids in Morgan’s class, and she knew Frank. But that was about it. She really needed more friends. “Sorry! If I’m keeping you, you can go. You probably don’t wanna be stuck talking to some awkward student who’s not even in your class.”

With an amused smile, Ben replied, “Yes, I do. I have a rather large collection of books at my home, as well as in my office. Most of the ones I keep here are related to my classes, but my personal library at home is a bit more diverse. Still, I’m rapidly running out of room in my collection. A pretty common struggle for your average bookworm, I suppose.” He said with a chuckle. “Of course! And I’m sure your professors understand that. What are you majoring, if you don’t mind me asking?” He asked. She knew Beck-- quite closely too, it seemed. But, she’d also said she wasn’t the creative sort. Hm. So how did she know her? “It’s nice to meet as well, Bexley.” He beamed. “I’ve taught here for the past ten years. First as an adjunct but I’m now an associate. Though I doubt you wanted to know that-- suffice to say, I’ve been here for some time. How are you finding your classes? I’m always interested in hearing what students think of the matriculation process.” He said before waving off her concern. “Ah, no, I’m done for the day. Like I said. I value what our student body has to say about the university.”

Bex’s eyes lit up at his words. “You have a library here?” she couldn’t help but ask, not thinking much of it, really. She wanted to see it. Books were her only escape for the longest time. It sounded stupid and cliche, but when you were locked up in a room for most of your life, adventure was where you made it. In hallways, in blanket forts, in books under the bed. She couldn’t help the curious glow in her eyes. “Oh, yeah, I totally get that. Most of the books I have at home are stuffed in my closet, but my dad’s library is pretty big. Though, he really only has law texts and old books on, like, world wars and stuff. I never understood the appeal of them, but I guess some people just like different things. I, uh-- I’m majoring in law. Well, pre-law, but, you know.” She shrugged. “Ten years? Wow, that’s a really long time. You must know this place well.” She wondered if he knew about all the hidden secrets White Crest had. He seemed so normal. But, then again, she seemed normal, too, didn’t she? Sometimes? “Oh, no worries! I don’t mind! Tell me whatever you want, I’ve been told I’m a good listener and I never mind learning more about people. But, uh-- classes are fine! They’re-- I was out for a bit, cause I was um...sick,” she scratched at the back of her neck, “but I’m catching back up, I think. It’s nice to know a lot of the professors here care so much about the students. Penn State felt very...different.” And yet she missed it. Missed the freedom. “That’s where I transferred from. I actually grew up here, but I don’t ever really feel like I did, since my parents sent me to private school.” And there she went, oversharing again. She bit her lip. “Sorry, that was probably more information than you wanted from someone who’s not even in your class.”

“Library is a strong word to describe my office, it’s just a wall with some shelves. But, it’s rather comprehensive, if I do say so myself.” Ben said with faux modesty. Always better to play the bashful professor than to yammer on about how much time and money and effort he had put into his collection. Particularly the money. There were first editions in his collection that librarians dreamed of. “I can’t say I understand the interest in the world wars either, but again. I’m a professor of antiquity. Anything beyond 6th century AD is too new for my tastes. It’s a wonder I can even use a smartphone.” He smiled at his own little joke. “Pre-law, that’s got quite the courseload. How are you finding it compared to Penn state?” He asked, shifting his weight so he could stand more comfortably, his body language relaxed and open as he listened to her ramble. “No, no, it’s quite alright. I grew up in town as well, but I went to college elsewhere, so I can understand that sentiment.”

“Wow,” Bex breathed, “I’m a bit jealous. I think it’s my dream one day to just have an entire room full of books. I...guess that’s really just a library, but they wouldn’t even need to be shelved. Stacks on stacks would be nice. I would shelve the nice ones, though. I’m not a heathen, I take care of my books!” In a way, Professor Campbell almost reminded Bex of Morgan. Less wiccan, though, and more scholarly. “Oh, really? What’s your favorite period? And, well, smartphones can be confusing, but really they’re just small computers. If you ever need help, I can probably show you. I had to show someone else recently how to use her smart phone cause she couldn’t figure out how to change the background wallpaper.” She swallowed, nodding maybe a little too eagerly. “Yeah, yep-- heavy course load. Lots of reading and citing and making sure everything is exactly word for word. My whole family is lawyers and they’ve all got degrees from Harvard, so you’d think it’d come naturally to me, but I guess I didn’t get the right genes. I’m trying my best, though, you know? And UMWC is...smaller than Penn, but I guess it feels...cozier? I liked the freedom I had at Penn state, but it was really high pressure. A lot of the kids in my program here just seem really bored, though. This isn’t a top school for pre-law so you have to get really high scores in order to even think about getting into Yale or Harvard or Princeton, so I think a lot of them are resigned to just going to second rate grad schools. Where’d you go to college?”

“Sounds like the dream of a fellow scholar,” Ben said, voice kind and understanding. She seemed young, impressionable. Eager to learn, eager to please. Interesting. How very interesting. “I’ve gone through the stacks of books phase myself, I know how that is. But, having shelves just really ties a room together. There’s nothing quite like seeing all the spines laid out, the titles staring back at you. It’s a wonderful thing.” He said with a nod. “I’m quite a fan of the first century of the Roman Empire. Marcus Aurelius, his works still hold to this day.” At the girl’s offer, he let out a small laugh, though internally he wanted to roll his eyes. He wasn’t inept. “I appreciate the gesture, but I think I’ll be fine. Thank you for the offer, though!” He said. As she continued to speak-- on and on, about her family, about her inane observations of what the campuses were like-- Ben continued to mentally measure and weigh her. This Bexley girl, she was new to the university, still trying to find her footing. She didn’t know many people, students or staff, she’d admitted that herself. She seemed as though she was struggling with that critical jump that all students experienced when they entered college. And who was he to withhold aid from a student in need? “Ah, I went to Princeton actually. For both undergrad and my doctorate. But, UMWC is still an upstanding school-- it’s no Ivy League, but I can assure you, faculty here are providing just as rigorous of an academic experience.”

“Well, I mean, that would be nice,” Bex sighed, “I don’t think I’d mind teaching all too much, but I’ve already got my future career all planned out.” Not that she was all too excited about it, and she was more than sure that it was getting harder and harder for her to hide that fact. SHe laughed it off and gave a smile. “I can’t wait to have my own library, it really does sound like a dream come true.” Her eyes perked up. “Oh, that’s a good one! The rise of the Roman Empire really is one of the most incredible things to read about. I’ve always wanted to go to Rome and see the remains of the old empire. Have you been?” She smiled up at him again, shifting in her spot. :Ah, right, of course. I just kinda-- like to offer to help. I like feeling like I can help, you know? And, wow, Princeton! That’s a pretty prestigious school. I think my parents really want me to go to Harvard. Did you like Princeton? And yeah, totally! I-I know this school is pretty great and there are a lot of wonderful professors, it just usually helps being at an Ivy League if you wanna get in somewhere like Harvard. Or Princeton. So I’ll just have to, you know, try harder. Which is fine! I can do that.” And hopefully not run herself too ragged in the process.

“As cliche as it is, I can’t help but quote John Lennon-- Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” Ben said, shamelessly using the quote. It was very “motivational poster-esque” but it resonated in students, for one reason or another. “So who’s to say what the future holds? I never thought I’d be a professor either, but I fell in love with academics during my undergraduate degree. Once I figured out that I wanted to teach the coming generations, who all shared my passion? I never looked back.” He replied. “Oh yes, I spent the third year of my doctoral program across Europe, assisting in archeological digs. I must say, I was jealous when I heard they uncovered the tomb of Romulus last February. I would have given anything to see that.” Ben let out a sigh and gave a shrug. As she continued on, babbling away, Ben was beginning to put together a nice little picture of her life. Overbearing parents, who wanted her to be something that-- well, he couldn’t quite tell if she wanted to be that. But, there was a hesitation to her that seemed quite promising. “I enjoyed my experience there quite a bit-- the environment, my peers, the professors… All of them were incredibly influential on my professional journey. And I owe my success to the university.” He smiled, though it faded as she mentioned trying harder. Eyebrows knitting together, he replied, “You know, rest is a very critical part of growth. It never hurts to take a break from time to time.”

Bex felt her immediate reaction bubbling up her throat-- John Lennon was such a problematic man, but of course a white cis man would think his quotes were profound-- but she swallowed it back down, smiling sweetly. “Sometimes cliche is true, though. They’re cliche for a reason, right?” She didn’t like the implication of it, though. Was she so transparent? That she didn’t want the life her parents had laid out for her? She rubbed her arm absently. “I know that, though. That I should stop and enjoy life. But what I want is kind of irrelevant. My family has been lawyers for centuries and every daughter has always taken over the business. So even if I don’t wanna do that, I don’t really have a choice.” But her grievance was immediately dismissed. “Wait-- you’ve been on digs? Like real, actual, digs!? Where you found stuff and you got to-- you got to see it first hand? Which digs? Where were they? What did you find? Oh, god, I nearly cried when they found Romulus’ tomb! What an amazing discovery! Can you even imagine being there for that? Or the new tomb they found in the Valley of King’s? It always feels like we’ve discovered so much, but then we just keep finding more and it’s amazing.” She couldn’t help the sparkle in her eye or the shine in her voice-- this was her true passion and the worst part about being a lawyer was that it made it impossible to chase. “Wow, Princeton sounds amazing. I haven’t done a campus visit yet, but I’ve heard good things about Harvard. If I make it in.” She withdrew a little at that. “I-- I know. And I did! Take a break. Sort of. It was an unintended break, but a break all the same.” If being in a nightmarish dreamscape counted as a break. 

“Indeed.” Ben said affably, eyes still analyzing her every move. The way she shifted in place, the way she rubbed her arm, the way her smile seemed a fraction less genuine than it had before. It seemed she wasn’t one for John Lennon. Suited him just fine, the Beatles were vastly overrated and John Lennon was a musician, what bearing did he have on anything that mattered? “I’m just a professor, so… please, you don’t need to take this to heart. But, life is meant to be lived, is it not? And what’s more important to life than choice? The freedom to live as you please and to live without wondering how things might have been different, it’s incredibly important.” He said with a firm nod before easing back slightly, his eyes losing some of their intensity. It seemed as though his mention of his field work had piqued her interest though, which was something else he made note of. If they met again-- and he would make a point of meeting her again-- he would have to bring that up. “I did. Truly incredible, the discovery they made there was absolutely groundbreaking. Literally, given how the dig went.” Ben joked. “History is absolutely like that. Just when we think we know it all, our ancestors surprise us.” Glancing down at his watch, Ben raised his eyebrows, as though startled by how much time had passed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to keep you. It’s not everyday I meet such a remarkable student like yourself, though.” Reaching into his jacket, he withdrew one of his cards and handed it to Bex. “If you’re ever interested in talking more-- about archeology or the Ivy Leagues, please feel free to contact me. I also have office hours on Thursday and Fridays, my door is open to you.” He said with a bright, toothy smile. 

Bex went still when he started explaining. It was the same things Morgan always told her, that her choice mattered, her wants mattered-- but it wasn’t as easy as all that. She had duties, she had responsibilities. Leaving that life just wasn’t an option. Her parents had made sure to drill that into her from a young age. This was her life, this would always be her life. She had no choice. Her eyes sank to the floor, she no longer felt brave enough to look him in the eye, even as he described his incredible experience of being part of a dig, being a part of history itself. It should have made her heart flutter to hear about it, but something inside of her told her to stop letting herself believe that one day she might get to have something like that, too. She nodded slowly. “No, it’s fine! You didn’t keep me,” she said, trying to keep the smile plastered to her face as she glanced up enough to take the card he was offering her. She stared at the neatly typed words pressed onto the paper. Benjamin Campbell. Professor of the Classics. His information was included below the title. “Remarkable?” she repeated, unsure if she’d heard that word right. “But I’m not even--” in any of his classes. But as she looked at him, she knew the offer was genuine. Her smile came a little easier this time. “Thank you. Really. For-- for this.” She pocketed the card. “It was really great to meet you, Professor. I’ll um-- I’ll see you around. I usually tend to read here most days so, you know.” She chewed her lip before grabbing her bag. “Thanks. A-again.” She needed to stop saying thanks, Mina would kill her if she knew. “I appreciate you taking the time to talk to me.” And then with that, she scurried off, the business card, and a million questions, burning a hole in her pocket. She couldn’t wait to talk to him again-- maybe things really weren’t as bad as they felt. Maybe she could have a good life here.

[melissart]

Date Night

Terry x Korvo Solar Opposites fanfiction!

Rating: M

Warnings: Alien sex stuff, Korvo cries during sex a lot, NSF*W

Genre: romance, comedy, hurt/comfort

Words: 3,852

Summary: “Couples go to scheduled fancy dinners to help keep their relationship alive.“

Korvo paced around the backyard with his Element Detector.

Beep… beep… beep… 

Nothing. 

There were no useful elements on Earth! Of all the 118 elements that Earth discovered, everything just had to be carbon-based. Korvo had enough carbon to last the destruction of five planets. What he needed was the isotope Megeon-166--or as it’s called on Earth, Erbium. He needed at least 15 moles to repair the ship and, of course, nobody was helping him. What was the point in being mad, anymore? He knew nobody would help him but it never got any less frustrating. 

Terry slid open the back door while cradling a tray of Starbucks™ frappuccinos in one arm. “Korvo!” he called out. “Got your favorite--matcha frappuccino!” 

No, that’s not right--Terry did help. Just in a different way. Only Terry knew how to get everyone’s Starbucks™ drinks right. 

Korvo tossed the Element Detector over his shoulder and took his frappuccino. Oh, the first sip was always the best. The whipped cream was at the bottom just the way he liked it. 

Terry just… stood there and watched him drink the frappuccino. He wasn’t even going to sip his own untouched pink drink. He was waiting for a specific response from Korvo. Probably one that was two words and began with a “T”. 

Korvo sighed. He had to relent. “Thank y--” 

“--Do you know what day it is today?” Terry quickly blurted out. He was unusually excited. 

Korvo paused for a second. The effects of the Dumb Ray still hadn’t subsided completely. “Friday?”  Was he forgetting something? It couldn’t possibly be their anniversary. 

“That’s right! It’s the first Friday of the month! That means it’s date night!” 

“That is ridiculous. Every night occurs on a date.”

 Terry laughed and put his hand on Korvo’s shoulder. Everything was a joke to him. “That gets funnier every time!”

Korvo brushes Terry’s hand off of him. It seems that Korvo has forgotten what “date night” was. Ten blasts of a Dumb Ray does that to you. “Explain it to me again.” 

“Couples go to scheduled fancy dinners to help keep their relationship alive.” 

Evidently, Terry has explained this concept multiple times. There were no side tangents, no movie references, and no headaches. “I am satisfied with our relationship.” Korvo sunk into himself and slightly turned away. “Are… you… not satisfied?” 

Terry erupted into an even louder bout of laughter and slapped his knee. “Hah! That gets funnier every time, too! It’s for fun, Korvo. I already made reservations at your favorite restaurant for 8PM.” 

“But, I--” 

Terry was already heading back inside to give Jesse and Yumyulack their drinks. “Make sure you wear something nice this time!” 

Korvo racked his mind for any memories of going on a date night with Terry, but there was nothing. Korvo didn’t realize how harsh the effects of the Dumb Ray were. He felt like an idiot. Maybe it was like the NBC show Dateline. He had some researching to do. If Terry found out Korvo’s memory was still foggy, Korvo would surely get locked up again. 

Terry was about to go on the best date night of his short, pathetic life. 

--- 

It was 7:50 PM, Terry was already dressed in his favorite pink button-up with the top button unbuttoned and jeans, and Korvo was nowhere to be found. To make things worse, Korvo took the car so Terry couldn’t even go to the nearest Jack in the Box to drown his sorrows in a $5 munchie meal. It was uncharacteristic of Korvo to forget about date night, especially when he reminded Korvo just earlier. Perhaps, he wondered, the Dumb Ray effects had not subsided yet.

He went into the replicants’ bedroom to ask them if they knew where Korvo was, but they were gone. That’s right, they were at a party and said they wouldn’t be back home until midnight. Terry was alone at the house. Bored. Bored in the house and in the house bored--just as how that TikTok prophesied. 

There were three loud knocks on the front door. Terry groaned. “Coming!” He wasn’t in the mood to entertain the neighbors. 

Terry opened the door to find a bouquet of a dozen red roses being shoved into his face. It was Korvo, all dressed up in a tuxedo as if he was about to get married. 

“I have arrived to date night you,” Korvo declared. 

Terry happily accepted the bouquet. “Sick plants, dude! I didn’t know they came in red.” 

“Red means love.” 

“Cool! Should I plant them?” 

“No, you put them in a vase with water.” 

“Hmm…” Terry stared at the stems. “I don’t know, Korvo, don’t plants need dirt?” 

“Why would I--” Korvo stopped himself and took a deep breath. He had to be charismatic. “You put them in a vase, you look at them for a couple days, and then they die.” 

“Aww…” Now Terry was bummed out. He hated reminders of his planned obsolescence and inevitable death. “What’s the point of it, then?” 

“Because they’re red, Terry!” Korvo’s fury was quick to resurface. “Red means love!” 

“Okay, fine, but you don’t have to yell!” 

Korvo hated himself. Stupid. He was already ruining their date night. 

----

Jazz music played softly in the background. It would have been relaxing if it weren’t avant-garde jazz. It was times like these that made Korvo pray for the Pupa to eat everyone and terraform the planet, already. He had no idea how the cacophony he was hearing could possibly be classified as music. There was no discernible key signature, no rhythm, no melody, no dynamics--it was literally just a collection of instruments blasting away and competing with each other to see who could best resemble a dying animal. 

“What the hell is this?” he grumbled. 

Terry was busy looking through the menu. “‘Om’ by John Coltrane.” 

Korvo was taken aback by the answer. He didn’t know Terry listened to this kind of noise. Even TV static sounded more harmonious. “What’s the point of it?” The thought of someone sitting in a recording studio and blasting terrible screeches into a microphone was enough to make someone gloober. 

“Uh, to piss off people like you, duh!” Terry scoffed. “Just relax a little, okay, Korvy?” He reached across the table to put his hand over Korvo’s. 

Korvo stared down at Terry’s hand and pondered for a moment. He curled his fingers over Terry’s hand. “I see… So what you’re saying is that music acts as a medium not only to organize patterns and produce a conventionally pleasing aesthetic, but also to defy those same standards and redefine the purpose of music through an ironic lens?” 

“That’s jazz, baby!” For emphasis, Terry does jazz hands with his free hand. 

Korvo leaned in and clasped his other hand over Terry’s. “You know a lot about music,” he comments. A loving smile curled the corners of his mouth upwards. 

Terry smirked. “Well, I did major in music when we went to community college… Remember when we did that? That was fun.” 

Korvo’s smile dropped. “You did?” He had no idea. 

“Yeah, I majored in percussion performance. I was trying to get into a drumline, like in the movie Whiplash. Don’t you remember? I even invited you to my winter and spring recital.” 

Korvo genuinely could not recall anything after Terry referencing Whiplash. This wasn’t on the Dumb Ray, this was clearly on his own negligence. “Oh.” Now that he thought about it, Terry was really good at drumming. 

Terry withdrew his hand and crossed his arms. He sighed, slumped into his seat, and looked away forlornly. “It’s okay, you were probably busy working on the ship… The mission is always the highest priority.” He was already conditioned to expect disappointment when telling Korvo anything about his personal ambitions. It was Wetzel’s Pretzels all over again. 

“It is...” Korvo agreed. 

Terry felt his heart sink. 

“... but you’re a high priority to me, too.” 

Before Terry could respond, their waiter interrupted to take their orders. “Seafood platter for him, fettuccine chicken alfredo pasta for me, and your biggest bottle of wine.” 

“Of course, sir.” The waiter took their menus away and left to relay the orders to the kitchen. 

Fuck, Korvo loved it when Terry ordered for the both of them. It made him feel slightly lesser. He tugged at his neck collar. 

“You know… I didn’t actually want to be a Pupa Specialist,” Terry quietly confessed. “I wish I could’ve been a music major on Shlorp.” 

“You could’ve,” Korvo reminded him, “but you’d be dead.” 

“Yeah, yeah, I know...” 

Korvo watched Terry slump further into his seat. He was blowing it. Again. Discreetly, he took out his phone on his lap and pulled up a Wikihow article he had bookmarked on Safari: “How to Get Guys to Like You More when You Go on a date”. He skipped to step 3, “Be conversational.” Korvo cleared his throat. “Um… I wanted to be a biologist on Shlorp.” 

“Aren’t you already a biologist?” Terry argued. “Science is like, your whole gimmick.” 

“I’m an electrical engineer. I work with technology. I only got to take a few biology courses but my schedule was so loaded since I was a math/physics/engineering triple major, so I had no time to declare a minor in biology.” 

Terry laughed. “You sure dodged a bullet! Pupa Specialists had to take a shitton of bio classes, and let me tell you, the only silver lining is the sex unit.”

“There’s a sex unit?” 

“Yeah! Meiosis, DNA, best positions, tongue stuff… Jesse was conceived during that unit!” Terry smiled fondly, as if it were a normal sweet memory to be nostalgic of. “Ooh, ooh, how was Yumyulack conceived?” 

“With my right hand and a magazine at a lab.” Korvo didn’t realize there was anything more to it than that. “Tell me more about this unit,” he demanded. 

“Okay, so on the first day of class, our lab experiment for the day is to analyze genetic fluids, but wait! Our old tree professor forgot to order enough sample genetic fluids for the entire class! But, it turns out that collecting genetic fluids is the real lab experiment! Of course, I’m just sitting there with my lifemate, confused as hell, while the TA’s start to unbutton their robes…” 

------

Terry and Korvo laughed as they stumbled out of the restaurant together, holding hands and swinging it between them. When Terry asked for their biggest bottle of wine, they sure did deliver. Behind them, the warm glow of the restaurant faded away as they searched for their car. 

Terry wiped away tears of mirth with the back of his hand. “So I said, ‘You wouldn’t know one if you saw one!’” 

Korvo dropped the car keys as he erupted in more laughter. “Hohoheehoihoiheehoihoi! You sure told him! That was something that you told him, alright!” 

Korvo and Terry crouched down to reach for the car keys at the same time. They both groped around the spinning ground until their hands met. They looked up at each other with the same dazed, lovesick look in their eyes. 

Within seconds, they were sloppily making out. Terry had so much to drink that he couldn’t even feel where his body started and Korvo’s ended. All he could taste was wine and seafood. He felt Korvo topple over, putting Terry on top of him, straddling Korvo’s hips between his legs. Their tongues swirled around each other as Korvo moaned and dug his fingers onto the back of Terry’s shirt. The sidewalk was cold, but their bodies were hot enough to compensate. 

Terry pulled away and fumbled to unbutton his shirt. 

“Woah, woah, woah--I think we should, should go home first.” Korvo slowly sat himself up. 

“You can’t even drive!” 

“Of course I can!” Korvo declared, unintentionally flicking specks of saliva onto Terry’s face as he spoke. “W-We’re aliens! Our bodies… they got high tolerance… Alcohol sharpens our senses!” He pushed Terry off of him and crawled over to the car keys. 

Terry helped him up. “That doesn’t sound so right, but I don’t know enough to argue with that!” 

Korvo waved the car key fob in the air and pressed the lock button repeatedly, struggling to hear where their car was. “Beep beep! Beep beep! Beep beep!” he called out, as if it were a dog that could respond and come running over. “Fuck, where’d I park?” 

Terry turned Korvo around to face their car. 

“Oh shiiit, found it!” 

Korvo clicked the unlock button a few dozen times, then they let themselves in. Neither of them bothered to strap in their seatbelts.

-----

As soon as their bedroom door was shut and locked, Korvo and Terry started hurriedly undressing each other. Terry kissed Korvo’s neck as he loosened his bowtie while Korvo yanked Terry’s shorts down and began unbuttoning his shirt. 

“Fuuuck, Terry,” Korvo raspily moaned out. “I-I want you to dominate me! Dominate me, Terry! Make me your slut!” 

“Yeah, you’re a little slut, huh?” Terry palmed Korvo’s mound. “My fucking whore needs to be taught a lesson?” 

Korvo bucked his hips into Terry’s hand. “Yes, Terry!” he groaned. “Teach me a lesson!” 

Terry swept Korvo off his feet in one motion and carried him to the bed. As soon as he dropped him, he crawled on top of Korvo and tugged Korvo’s dress pants down. Korvo’s rootstalk was eager to be exposed, wriggling out of its hole to meet Terry’s tongue. Terry gave the thick root one long, slobbering, lick up the shaft and to the tip. “Alright, Korvy, pop quiz--what’s the powerhouse of the cell?” 

Korvo didn’t respond. 

“Wait, Korvo, you do know what the powerhouse of the cell is, don’t you?” Terry heard a small sob. He looked up at Korvo, who was covering his blushing face, wet and shiny from fresh tears. Terry crawled away from between Korvo’s legs and to his side. “Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” he whispered gently. He coaxed Korvo’s hands away from his face. 

Of course, being asked what was wrong only made Korvo cry harder and curl away. “I-I-I forgot!” he wailed. “I f-forgot what the powerhouse of the cell is! W-What is it? I have no f-f-fucking clue!”

Terry hugged him from behind. “It’s okay, baby, it doesn’t matter! It’s just the mitochondria.” 

“I-I just… I just feel so dumb. I’ve been waiting weeks for my intelligence to fully recover ever since you hit me with the Dumb Ray, but… but that’s it. This is as smart as I ever was before! And I’m fucking s-s-st-stu-stupid!” 

Terry squeezed him harder while he sobbed and wailed and gooblered all over the both of them. “There, there, Korvo.” He knew the drill. Korvo cried during sex all the time--something about the physical release of his genetic fluids seemed to trigger an emotional catharsis in him. This time was unusually early, though. They hadn’t even finished foreplay. “Do you want some ice cream?” 

“N-No, let’s continue having sex,” Korvo insists. 

“But you’re crying--” 

“--Well, I’m still horny!” He tried to dry his eyes, but it was a Sisyphean task. 

“Alright, fine, but talk about your feelings while I’m sucking you off.” Terry crawled back over to Korvo’s crotch and continued where he left off--licking the thick root all over, from bottom to top. He began sucking the tip of it, which wriggled slightly as it grew more. 

Korvo panted heavily. “O-O-Oh my g-god…” Hot pleasure took over him. “Well, I wanted to be a biologist on Shlorp, but…” He interrupted himself with a loud moan when Terry started deep-throating his root. “Hohhhmygod! Oh, Terry! Fuck, it feels so good!” He felt his root lengthening more and wriggle down Terry’s throat. “Terry, Terry, Terry… I’m gonna--ohhh, fuck…” 

Terry gave a small grunt of surprise when Korvo’s genetic fluids began squirting down his throat. He could just barely taste the sweet, floral nectar as he swallowed. There was so much to swallow down. Korvo was always so repressed--he was always too busy studying repair manuals to jerk off every now and then. 

Korvo felt dizzy from the waves of pleasure still crashing over him after his release. “Terry, I love y--”

“--What happened?” Terry interrupted. 

“Huh?” 

“What happened to being a biologist?” Terry asked again. “I mean, you could’ve just not majored in so many majors in the first place, right?” 

Korvo grabbed a spare pillow and put it over his face. “It’s not important anymore, never mind,” he said, muffled. 

“Korvo, c’mon, I won’t tell you my secret sex techniques if you don’t tell me your tragic backstory.” 

Korvo uncovered his face. “Tell me,” he demanded.

“You first!” 

Korvo took a moment to decide if it was truly worth opening up about his deepest, darkest insecurities just for sex. It was a very short moment. “I got a B+ in Intro to Biology my first year.” 

Terry waited for further explanation, but there was nothing more. “B+ isn’t a bad grade?” 

“I know!” Korvo snapped. “But I-I freaked out! That was my first B in a class, ever! And now we’re stuck on Earth and the Pupa could destroy us all any second and it’ll be all my fault because I wasn’t smart enough to fix the ship! And I’m not even smart enough to understand why the Pupa is 670C because I got freaked out over a B! And now we’re all going to die!” Gooblers danced all over their bedsheets. 

“Korvo, baby, relax!” He wiped away Korvo’s tears. “Even if you quadruple-majored in biology/math/physics/engineering, we’d still be on Earth because you couldn’t fix the ship. It doesn’t matter!” 

Korvo buried his face into Terry’s chest and gave out a strangled scream. 

Terry laughed to himself. “I mean, what’s the point of studying so much if you can’t even fix the ship?” He stroked the back of Korvo’s head lovingly. “I was able to fix a lavatic reactor in just a few minutes of reading one of your dumb manuals!” One of the gooblers popped straight into his eye. “Ow! Okay, I’m sorry! I guess the point is, uh… I’ll help you fix the ship. How does that sound?” 

The gooblers finally came to a stop. “You will?” 

“Anything to get you to stop crying during sex…” Terry grumbled.

Korvo began showering Terry with kisses. “Oh, Terry! Thank you! Mwah, mwah! Thank you so much! There’s so much I still have yet to diagnose in the ship--the catalytic nasprober, the psionic cholecystosanitizer, the carcino-fibrillator, the hexylgraph, the blinkers--” 

The list went on and on and on and on and on. Terry didn’t realize how much was wrong with the ship until now. He started to understand why Korvo was so stressed out all the time. Korvo had spent hours every day working on the ship for over a year, and this entire time Terry assumed that Korvo was just bad at repairing. 

There had to be an end to this. Terry slowly crawled back over to Korvo’s root, still wet with saliva and nectar genetic fluids, and began sucking at it again. It was only a matter of seconds until Korvo was back to being a squirming, moaning mess.

Korvo rested his hand on Terry’s head. “T-T-Terry, T-Terry! Oh, Terry!” 

After Terry deemed it wet enough, he finally gave his mouth a break. “Okay, don’t freak out,” he warned Korvo. 

“Why should I not freak out?” Korvo asked, freaking out already. 

“I’m gonna try a special Shlorpian sex technique on you.” 

Korvo has only ever had sex with Terry the traditional way--humping and twisting their roots around each other. “It won’t hurt, will it?” 

“Hmm--well--um---I wouldn’t say hurt?” 

“I do not like your hesitance.” 

“Okay, okay, okay! So, you twist up your partner’s root into a spiral-cone-thing, tuck that into their root-hole, and fuck it like a pussy, basically.” 

The image of it was vivid in Korvo’s head. It sounded so… demeaning and aggressive. “Okay.” 

Terry kissed him. “I love you!” He licks Korvo’s root and tries to coat as much saliva as he can on it before twisting the root as tight as he can. This, of course, is not the part where it hurts because their roots do not have pain receptors. With his other hand, he gently pries open Korvo’s root hole. 

Korvo groaned. He felt so violated in a way he had never felt before. It felt so lewd to have Terry stretch his root hole open. He bites his tongue when Terry starts fingering him. “Mmghh…!” It hurt so good. 

“Damn, Korvo, you’re so tight. Tighter than Honey Boo Boo’s training bra!” 

“Oh, shut up.” 

“Seriously, you make Terri look like a corner street hooker! Because you’re so tight, get it?” 

“Yes, Terry. I get it.” 

Terry lapped at Korvo’s hole, then stuck the tip of his tongue in. Breathy moans spilled out of Korvo as he clencher himself around Terry’s tongue. Terry went back to sucking on Korvo’s root while slowly pushing his finger inside of Korvo’s hole. Korvo’s moans crescendoed with every millimeter Terry pushed in. Terry tried to wriggle his finger and stretch out Korvo’s hole as much as he could before squeezing in another one. 

“Ahh… Ahh! T-Terry! Oh my god--Terry! Mmphh!” Korvo grinded his hips against Terry’s fingers. “Fuck, fuck, fuck! T-Th-That feels s-so good!” He was close to cumming all over again. 

Terry took his mouth off of Korvo’s root and began twirling the root around his finger. He wasn’t one to brag, but it was known that he had the best root-twirling technique in his class. Korvo’s root was, thankfully, very flexible and easily conformed to the twirled form. Terry quickly shoved the root as deep into Korvo’s hole as possible. There was a soft squelch underneath Korvo’s grunts. Terry got on top of Korvo, pinned Korvo’s arms over his head, and kissed him as he gently pushed his root inside of Korvo. 

Korvo wrapped his legs around Terry’s hips. He finally understood the human concept of “heaven” and it was Terry holding him down and jack-hammering away at his hole. Within seconds, he was already cumming. His root clenched hard around Terry’s and squirted more lubrication for Terry to penetrate even deeper and harder. 

It wasn’t long until Terry cummed, too. His hot nectar filled Korvo up and leaked all over both of their groins. He slowed down, then eventually paused. This was usually around the time when Korvo started to cry again. He rested his sweaty forehead against Korvo’s. “Korvo?” 

The waterworks came back. “Terry, I love you so much! I-I-I’m sorry I keep crying d-during s-s-sex!” 

“It’s okay, I love you too.” He accepted more tear-stained kisses. “Do you wanna keep going?” 

Korvo shook his head no. 

Terry got off of Korvo and hugged Korvo and patted his back while he cried. “It’s okay, Korvy… I love you a lot, too! We have a house and replicants and a cute little Pupa--we really nailed this whole family thing, huh?” 

All in all, Terry would say that it was a very successful date night. 

[wondereads]

Personal Recommendation (2/28/21)

Damsel by Elana K. Arnold

Why am I recommending this book?

I loved this one. I finished it in less than two hours and then spent an extra hour lying there thinking about how great it was. I think this is the first book I’ve felt this way about in a long time, so anticipate a very long, spoiler-filled review. (Please keep in mind, this review discusses things like rape, abuse, and extreme misogyny. If this is a trigger for you, please do not read this review! Also, if you’re looking to avoid spoilers, skip to the Overall section.)

Want something quick and short? Check out my tiktok

Plot 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10

In the land of Harding, it’s tradition that after the previous king dies, the prince will venture out, slay a dragon, and rescue a damsel. When Ama wakes up in the arms of Prince Emory of Harding, she has no memory of the dragon or anything before that. However, as she starts her new life as Emory’s fiancée, she starts to realize that life in the palace isn’t quite what it seems.

One thing you must understand is that this book is character-driven. There is no grand plan or kingdom-threatening evil. It’s all about Ama and how she deals with life in Harding. As such, the plot section will be a little short. The gradual transition that takes place in Ama from her arrival to the wedding is very well done, and the slow revelations that take place really begin to up the ante towards the end. Even if this wasn’t the most exciting book I’d ever read, I was entirely invested in Ama and her search for the truth.

There was also a very cool bit of symbolism in this book with the comparison of Sorrow, Ama’s lynx kit, and Pawlin’s falcon. The falcon represents what Emory wishes Ama to be, the perfect pet. An obedient creature that will always return to him. Sorrow represents what Ama actually is. A wild animal that was partially trained before eventually finding freedom again. Both Ama and Sorrow return to Harding with Emory, are trained to behave a certain way, and face pain and sickness before escaping.

Also, this was the most satisfying ending to a book that I’ve read in a long time. It’s a bit open in that we don’t know what the characters will be doing after or what will happen in Harding, but Ama gets what she wants and takes out the people who were keeping it from her, and even though I don’t know what will happen to her after, I know it’ll probably be something good.

Characters 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10

Now, this is the section that will be quite long. Ama has her quirks and traits, but I believe that first and foremost she is average. She has the sort of compassion that you would expect from any human being, and she doesn’t always speak out. Sometimes, she’s scared, and she ends up giving in. As the story progresses, Ama begins to lose some of her fire, she begins to give up. It’s very easy to see how her treatment is having an effect on her character, and that’s why I felt so strongly about her arc. Seeing her gradually lose herself makes me all the more insistent that she will win in the end. And she does, and it’s a very satisfying win at that. I’m particularly fond of how she turns Emory’s words on him during her escape.

Emory is an incredibly well-written character. The transition from savior to captor is very smooth and convincing. When Ama first meets Emory, he’s very sweet. He showers her with compliments, he prioritizes her comfort over his own, and he protects her fiercely. He was so nice that I at first thought that he would be Ama’s ally in Harding. However, once Ama and Emory enter Harding, a place where he is now king, he changes. He expects Ama to fit the mold of the perfect bride; quiet, docile, pretty. He humiliates her, does whatever he pleases, and he can get away with it all because he has undeniable power there. To put it simply, Emory slowly begins to show the classic signs of an abuser. He exerts his power in every way, he cuts her off from the outside world, he tries to deprive her of Sorrow, her only protector, and he and his friends gaslight her at every turn. And it’s slow enough that by the time Ama is exposed, she’s already under the watchful eye of an entire kingdom. A realization of Ama’s puts it in perfect terms - he likes her best when she’s in need of rescuing.

Ama and Emory at first seem like the perfect couple. It matches what we have been taught, the brave prince and the beautiful damsel, and Emory is dedicated to the show. In fact, Emory never once physically abuses Ama. He loves to give her compliments, and it’s obvious he genuinely wants to marry her. Unfortunately, the reasons for marrying Ama are probably due to his coronation and his belief that, as king, he needs a damsel as queen. The psychological abuse on Ama is profound, and, because of the culture in Harding, he can get away with it no problem. It’s only through Ama’s own strength and the help she receives from other girls, such as Tillie and the queen mother, that she is able to escape.

The last major character I want to talk about is the queen mother. She is very important for Ama’s discoveries, and she’s a classic abuse victim. She has come to accept what happens in Harding as the norm, and she encourages Ama to accept it as well so she won’t get hurt. However, she still is an important character to Ama, and she still, perhaps on purpose, helps Ama escape what she had to experience. I have high hopes for her at the end.

Writing Style 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10

This book is written in a similar style to a typical fairytale. It has similar language, and a lot of the descriptions, especially of Ama’s inner feelings, are rather abstract. It really does feel like an exceptionally long fable. Also, the pacing in this book, the way the revelations of Emory’s character and Ama’s memory are spread out, is perfect. It held my attention just enough, and once it began to pick up speed towards the end I was absolutely ready for it. It’s not hard to predict what the big secret is. Odds are, if you’re on Tumblr as much as I am, you could tell by the time you finished the summary. However, Arnold leaves it right up to the last moment to reveal what impact that secret will have. Although it was the ending I was hoping for, I wasn’t sure it would be right up until it happened.

Meaning 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10

There is some great commentary in Damsel on rape culture, psychological abuse, and the effects of misogyny. First of all, Harding is one of the most misogynistic kingdoms in the fictional world. The worst part is, most of it isn’t through actual physical threats to women. There is one scene where two men attempt to sexually assault Ama. However, her savior is Emory, her abuser. 

The big problem in Harding is the absolute dehumanization that woman face. Multiple times, women are referred to as vessels, having no worth beyond the children they carry and raise. It is so heavily ingrained into the damsels when they arrive that the queen mother believes it to be true. All of the girls that have lived in Harding, such as Tillie, agree with it as well. Women are expected to sit quietly and look pretty while the men around them make crude jokes and treat them like objects. This is why Emory can do what he does. He can almost rape Ama and literally lead her around on a leash because the entire society of which he is king is filled with enablers and bystanders. Ama knows throughout the entire book that the way Emory treats her is wrong. It goes against her very nature, but she submits to it. Why? Because everyone around her acts like it’s normal. Because it’s better than being held captive by a dragon. Because it’s better than being on the streets where much worse could happen to her. Because it’s just the way things are. 

Damsel has some pretty powerful statements on how rape culture can enable abuse and psychologically wear down women. It shows what horrible things a abuse victim can be subjected to. However, it also shows what happens when Tillie and the queen mother help Ama in the little ways they can. It shows that woman can stand up to their abusers and have a much brighter future; that they are not defined by what they have endured. And I think that’s why I loved this book so much.

Overall 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10

I was wholly invested in the book. I absolutely loved it, and I will definitely be getting a personal copy for myself. Ama’s journey of self-discovery (literally) pulls the reader in, and Emory’s quiet transition is so subtle and powerful. The social commentary is amazing, and you will absolutely love Sorrow. Please do keep in mind that this book deals with some heavy topics such as rape and abuse, so do not read it if you have issues with that. I would recommend this book to people who enjoy fantasy, fractured fairytales, and people getting what they deserve.

The Author

Elana K. Arnold: American, also wrote A Boy Called Bat, What Girls Are Made Of, and Red Hood

The Reviewer

My name is Wonderose; I try to post a review every two weeks, and I take recommendations. Check out my about me post for more!

[obsessivestar]

Steamy Love (A Tom Hiddleston x Reader) Part 21: ~Friendship~

Summary: You spend more quality time with your best friend and best man!

Warnings: None.

Read it on my Wattpad: @/HiddlesStar

Word count: 1715

Author Notes: Sorry this chapter took so long! Had to take a break to get the creativity back. Expect weekly chapter updates to resume again!

Tags: @theoneanna @midnightdragonzero @drakesfiance @kcd15 @ihthr @deviantsendbyreallife @bookgirlunicorn

"What the hell is 'Leg Day'?" Your friend asked, looking rather confused.

Your cheeks immedietly got a little pink. You had remembered in the last live stream you did with Tom, he mentioned the infamous High-Rise 'Leg Day' inside joke you two had created in regards to the first love scene where Laing lifts Charlotte's legs up. He had referenced the joke while talking about how Zero Suit Samus fights in Smash Bros. Ultimate. He didn't explain it, though, keeping the inside joke as an inside joke.

"Umm.." You paused again. You really weren't sure how to explain it, or even if you should explain it. It was a bit...personal.

"Well...it's..."

Before you could really give a response, Tom knocked at the door, walking in once he had permission.

"Are you ladies hungry at all?" He asked. You could tell your friend liked being called that from him. You weren't offended by their little crush. You understood how they were feeling, and it honestly made you feel even luckier to be with Tom.

"I am." You smiled some.

"Me too!" Your friend chirped. "I've barely eaten today."

"Shall we go out for lunch? Say, 10 minutes?.." Tom smiled some.

"In 10 minutes works!" You chirped, and your friend nodded in agreement. Tom gave a little wave and left, closing the door again. Surprisingly, your friend didn't ask about Leg Day again, thankfully. They probably just forgot about it.

After a couple minutes, the three of you left to go get some lunch. Unfortunately by now, the paparazzi knew what streets you and Tom go down to get to places like the grocery store and restaurants, so you'd spot cameras at specific areas. Tom tried not to acknowledge the cameras as you all exited the vehicle after arriving at a lunch joint, but you and your friend gave a slight wave before entering the building, knowing they couldn't follow you in. You were surprised to see that no one in this lunch place knew Tom or you, so you didn't see anyone watching you while you all ate.

"How did you two meet, again?" Your friend asked as you waited for your food.

"I'm surprised she didn't tell you.." Tom smiled, referring to you.

"No I told her. She probably just wants to hear the story again.." You chuckled, getting a little grin from Tom. "We met when he came to my hotel room asking for an extra towel. I didn't even know it was him at that moment.."

"I don't blame you. Me and Loki look nothing alike.." Tom smirked.

"Still, I should've recognized those nice eyes immedietly.." You admitted, getting another big smile from Tom. "It was actually (BF/N) that helped me remember who you were."

"Really?" Tom asked, a little surprised.

"Yeah, I had a call with her on that bus ride to the meeting. That's when she told me. After that, I met you at the meeting the director had set up. That's where I learned we would be costars.."

"Ooh, and the rest is history.." Your friend giggled, nudging you some.

"Do you think you would've realized it was me at the meeting, if she hadn't of reminded you?" Tom asked curiously.

"I mean, they said your last name in the meeting.." You nodded some. "My anxiety would've gone through the roof." You joked, Tom smirking somewhat mischievously.

"I hope you guys weren't having super obvious eye-sex at the meeting." Your friend joked with a chuckle.

"Oh not at all. Not until we got to his hotel room that day.." You admitted with a wink. Tom gave a little snicker.

"I was quite tempted to make a move then, I'll admit.." Tom smirked.

"So was I.." You grinned, seeing Tom's eyes darken and look you over.

"Hey." Your friend snapped their fingers some. "We're in public! Y'all are like rabbits. Jesus.." They shook their head, making you and Tom laugh.

"People would lose their minds if they heard this conversation, I swear.." Your friend laughed, leaning back against their seat.

It was nice reminiscing about your first couple days with Tom, before you had even begun to share a living space. You remember the dark fantasies that had been playing in your head when you went back to his hotel room with him. Now you've probably relived those fantasies twice as much as you expected in your bedroom, and now especially out of the bedroom.

"Let them hear." You shrugged, noticing Tom's slight surprise. You had started to come across paparazzi the more you and Tom have gone out. You wondered if any one of them had watched your streams to get any juicy gossip. Things have been amazing. Any gossip has been good and just excites fans.

During lunch, you talked a lot about your streams. Tom's been really interested in the technical side of it. He's almost been a regular guest. You guys can't even count how many inside jokes you've created.

Leg Day will always be your favourite, of course. It was practically the first.

After dinner, you all returned back to Tom's house. You all decided to stream together. It would probably be a while until the three of you get together again. Now's a good time for it. You all got to play a game together too, deciding to pick Smash Ultimate since it had just come out. Helping Tom figure out these games is one of the best parts of streaming with him. He could be so old sometimes.

"Oh my God, enough with the legs!" You chuckled as you fought against your best friend. They're good with Zero Suit Samus, and they use the Up B attack when you're about 100% to get a stock off you. They're really good.

"What, I thought you liked Leg Day?" Tom commented with a smirk, getting a shy but playful chuckle out of you.

"I don't wanna hear any of that shit, big dog." You chuckled. You could practically hear Tom's big grin as he gave out that iconic 'ehehehe' laugh.

"Y'all still have to tell me what that means." Your friend commented. You gave a slight playful glance to Tom, and he returned the expression. This is very entertaining.

Further into the stream, you were letting your friend teach Tom how to play. He wanted to get better with Joker.

"Joker is a pretty cool character." You admitted with a little smile, keeping an eye on chat while watching Tom and your friend play.

"He seems cool.." Tom smiled. He liked using the white school uniform skin, rather than the mask skins.

"I like his mask. It suits him." Your friend added. "Do you think Loki would ever wear a mask?"

"I don't think he'd want anything to cover his face.." Tom replied. "He may wear one to a Ball, as like a disguise.."

"Who would want to cover those eyes?" You smiled, getting a bashful smile from Tom.

"Very true.." Tom nodded.

As Tom was learning to play, you kept an eye on chat. In a quick moment, something caught your eye.

"Someone sent in a donation and just wrote in 'Nut Hiddleston' and it's really confusing.."

Your friend laughed. "Tom Nut Hiddleston.." They spoke, making you laugh as well.

"Nut? What? What does that mean?" Tom asked, a little confused. "Like a peanut?"

Oh God. That just made you laugh more. How can this man be so innocent in public, but a freak under the bed sheets?

"Sure. A peanut.." You nodded, though you could tell Tom didn't believe that's what it actually meant.

"What? What does it mean?" He asked again, getting all confused when you and your friend giggled. "What does nut mean?"

Him repeating the question just made you laugh more. Hearing it with such a concern tone in his voice was just hilarious. You were starting to notice that little small things he did were funnier than you'd normally think, like him giving little smiles or dropping something. It would give you a warm feeling in your chest, too.

You finally leaned in close to his ear to whisper what it meant. His expression went from slight confusion, to complete embarrassment.

"O-Oh my.." Tom blushed heavily, fixing his glasses. "I-I see.." You giggled again, shaking your head.

"How did you not know what it means?" Your friend asked Tom with a little laugh.

"I don't keep up with today's lingo!" Tom chuckled. "I just learned of what TikTok was the other day..."

"Oh God, TikTok.." Your friend cringed some, making you laugh. "Stay far away from that App, Tom.."

"From what I've heard, I can understand that.." Tom agreed.

After the stream was over, you all got ready for bed. You helped your friend get settled in the guest room, your former bedroom, before going back to your new room to lay down with Tom. You crawled into bed and nuzzled up to his half naked figure. He smiled and wrapped an arm around you.

"I nearly forget the times we slept in separate beds.." Tom admitted.

"I nearly forget what it's like not to wake up with jelly legs.." You added with a shy blush, getting a chuckle from Tom.

"It's not too much, is it?" He asked. "I'm a bit of an...adventurous lover."

"No, it's great.." You smiled, pecking Tom's chest. "You're great.."

Tom smiled, turning off the little side lamp so the room would get dark, laying down on his pillow and closing his eyes to fall asleep.

"...I'm gonna miss this.." You admitted, making him open his eyes again. "After March, you're headed back to the UK and I'm headed home.."

Tom detected the sadness in your voice. Truthfully, he would miss this too, but he couldn't possibly ask you to move in with him, or at the very least, spend another couple months away from home.

"...Hey now, that's not for another couple months.." Tom spoke up, trying to lighten the mood. "Let's enjoy the time we still have together.." He pecked your forehead, making you smile a bit.

"I know.." You spoke in a soft tone, nuzzling close before closing your eyes and falling asleep.

You can't keep delaying this conversation forever, though.

[survivormetaverse]

Rites of Passage

Elle: I never met you, here's a joke!Never trust a pirate duck.They have the power to unleash the quackin'.🦆🏴‍☠️

Amy: I wish I got to meet you! You seem so wonderful.

Jodi: Hey Bri, we never got to play together but you destroyed my guy Jared’s perfect game in the first tribal council and I thought that was pretty funny. Cheers!

Elle: I was SO sad when you were voted out 🥲 because I figured we'd swap into the same tribe or make merge and we could work together and talk about Stardew Valley, I also started listening to the Penumbra podcast (which I know you listen to The Magnus Archives, but there's a lot of overlap between the fandoms so I thought maybeeee you had listened to it too) Anyway! It doesn't really matter I just was really sad when you were voted out ❤️Here's a joke ^_^: I asked a French speaking man if he played video games.He answered, "wii".

Amy: I’m sorry I didn’t get to meet you. I loved your intro video and I had heard of you from past games. You seem so cool.

Jodi: Also never got to play with you, but Brayden told me you’re cool so hopefully I’ll meet you some time in a game!

Elle: I just know you from Kyoshi where you voted me out and we didn't really talk that much… so 😅 I hope you had fun in Metaverse?Here's a dad joke: My grandma started walking 5 miles a day when she was 65She’s 91 now! But we have NO idea where she is 🤷🏽‍♀️

Amy: I was so hoping to chat with you again because we barely got the chance in HB. You are wonderful and I hope to one day actually play on the same tribe as you!

Jodi: I heard you were my guy’s ride or die until you weren’t, you won the very first comp of the season so good job, hope to see you around in the community!

Elle: A truly unanimous vote, I never met you, but you dropped this, king 👑✨A joke: There once was a king who was exactly 12 inches tall!Terrible king, but he made a great ruler!📏🤴✨

Amy: The legend! All I know about you is you have some chaotic energy and I love that! 

Jodi: The truly unanimous vote of the season....we really wanted to give you your first W but you literally just did not show up even for your vote out. I still wonder to this day if you’ve found out you got voted out yet. Nevertheless, nice saying hi to you a couple times!

Elle: You were super nice and I'm sad that you were voted out as soon as you were 💔 we should've talked more when we were on the same tribe.You know every time I see a Jennifer Aniston movie, it seems like she's playing the same person.I guess she's a victim of Rachel profiling.

Amy: Girl I wish I got to know you better because once you came back online after the tribe swap you were so sweet. I really enjoyed your presence and I think the game could have been very different had we worked together. Wishing you all the best.

Jodi: I’m glad I got your vengeance :) Sorry you didn’t last longer in the game! Bye mittens

Elle: I don't know you, but here's a dad joke:Yesterday I spotted an albino dalmatian.It was the least I could do for him🖌

Amy: Oh Danny how I wish it would have worked out with us two! You were so fun and I loved working with you but I’ll never forget sitting on call for an hour when you ghosted our challenge. I’m sorry it ended like that, but I hope we get to play again together because I adore your vibe!

Jodi: All my Fools paragraphs are going to involve Jared since that’s the only relation I have with you all, but Danny I heard you’re my guy’s other ride or die and he told you about his idol. I grilled him when he told me about it at the merge because damn you were connected. You would’ve told everyone (but everybody knew already lol) hope to see you around!

Elle: Ginnyyyyy 💔 I'm sorry I didn't really want to vote you out but I wasn't trying to ruffle any feathers that early into merge, I truly did believe you when you said you were done being chaotic. Your lipsync TikToks are very fun🎶A joke for you: What do you call a singing computer?A Dell! 🎤🎶

Amy: I’m so sorry girl. I didn’t want to see you go, but it was decided. I enjoyed playing this game together through all of premerge and making it through the cursed Fools tribe with you and sitting in that hour challenge call just vibing. I hope we can chat more in the future. I am wishing you all the best because you deserve great things.

Jodi: Girl, you were my first comp partner and I wish we got closer and could play together more. I really thought you were super connected with other Stings players and that’s why I had to boot you before the Jury phase, because I wasn’t sure I could get close enough with you to work together. Regardless, you were fun to have on Phantom and I hope we can cross paths again!

Elle: My Libra rising sibling ♎️✨ I wish we got to work together more in this game, without that ‘no items’ twist round you definitely would've made it far. Thank you for talking astrology with me, giving Colin your items which ended up helping my game too, and just the existence of Neptune 🥰 big Brookyln 99 "I've only known [Neptune] for a day but if anything happened to him I would kill everyone in this room and then myself" vibes.Le joke: My partner just broke up with me. They're sick and tired of my constant zodiac puns.It Taurus apart, I'm in Pisces writing this.(a second one): Why did the nurse carry a red pen?In case she needed to draw blood!💉

Amy: Dennis 😭😭😭!!! I am so so sorry you were voted out that way. There were whispers the previous round too and I was able to squash that, but for your round it was decided before I could act and I saw Colin being villainized for sticking up for you. I am so, so sorry for how things went. I so wish we would have stayed closer in this game because we could have done great things together! I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for our conversations before you went because without them I would not have flipped to protect Colin. You were our guardian angel. Thank you for giving Colin your gifts and still trusting me to confide in me. I hope we can play in another game together because I wanted to work with you from Day 1! You are incredible and I wish you all the good vibes in the world!

Jodi: Dennis, you truly were the one to watch this season, because your reads and intuition were amazing. That’s why I aligned with you, because I like working with other thinkers. I’m really sorry that I voted you out that round, because I knew that if I were to strike, I could not miss with you. I rightfully knew that you had something really good, in not just 1, but 2 idols. After going for 15.5 hours on that Hunt, I knew that the only person that could’ve beaten me was you. You pushed me to be a better player and you definitely made it a very tough hill for me to climb to get to this point. I’m not sure if you gave me your vote this time, and I understand if you didn’t, but I adore your love for the game and I hope that next time we can align and blaze through some games. I give you props for figuring out my game so early on and you were the one that kept me on my toes and pushed me to play harder. I have lots of respect for you as a person and a player of this game, I hope we can be friends after this. 

Elle: From our first real interaction I knew you should be someone I'd work with. Unfortunately, I didn't end up reaching out really until it was a bit too late 😅 And we kinda ended up on opposing ends… whoops!I still think we could get along really well! ☺️ We're both creative and funny (though my humor is more an… acquired taste 😂 dad jokes aren't for everyone, I suppose) and have a lot of the same pop culture references from that one challenge lol.I hope your first ORG experience was still a good one, though 💖. Maybe I'll get to ally with you in the future?Un joke: Whenever my artistic partner is sad, I let them draw on my body,It's always good to have a shoulder to crayon.🖍✨

Amy: Babs! I don’t know how many times I wrote to other contestants and my host chat “I just want to be friends with Babs!” I wish we could have chatted more because I absolutely adore your energy. I had the best times on call listening to you. And like you said, great minds think alike. Our double tie was so fun! Hope to chat more soon!

Jodi: Babs, I truly adore you and you were the light of the tribe. I understand that your vote out seemed like a big betrayal, but I truly did not want you to go there. Colin and Elle both played things and everyone else was immune. I had to pick between you and Jared and I just could not vote out Jared due to our relationship. I hope you can forgive me on a personal level after this and we can talk because a lot of my joy in this game came from you. 

Elle: Well, this turned out better than Kyoshi did between us 😅 so at least there's that. It was fun being allies for a sec, and here's hoping neither of us gets swap screwed in the future 😂.Your joke: I have a friend who writes songs about sewing machines.He's a Singer songwriter, or sew it seams.

Amy: Brayden! Omg Brayden first I am so sorry I gave you that fake idol. I didn’t know it was going to you; I only knew it was going to second place. When Raffy told me it was you I was like omfg I accidentally gave a fake idol to one of my closest allies 🤦‍♀️. I want to see your creative challenge submission bc I think you probably deserved the win over me. Brayden, you were incredible in this game and I kept trying to see if you wanted to flip with me with some hints haha but you were closer with Jodi. Congratulations on graduating and on being Anastasia’s best friend! I loved getting to know you and working with you. I’m so sorry it ended the way it did. Hopefully I’ll see you in another game or mini! You’ll do great things!

Jodi: Brayden, I severely underestimated you in this game, even though I knew that you were going to be incredible since you’ve played before. When we met up at the merge, I was so grateful to have you be somebody I could bounce ideas off of. Anastasia and I said this later in the game, but you two and me and Jared should’ve come and done a 4-person alliance and rip through the late game. You were such a loyal ally and I really hope we get to play again some time. 

Elle: You have a very rational and sort of quietly analyzing mind that I noticed almost immediately and knew that I'd want you on my side, not only because I'd love to be allies with someone like that, but because I knew as an enemy you could easily be a death sentence.I appreciated your love for Survivor and lived in fear of a super idol since the first moment you mentioned their existence 😂. I really wish corn tribe could've made it to FTC 🌽💔, Ohioans for life! (I'm kidding I'm getting out of this state as soon as possible, but it was fun to bond over Ohio with you!)An edited! joke (see that was a slight joke right there… okay I'll see myself out): Did you hear about the guy trying out for editor for the sums series of Math Magazine?It was an addition edition audition.

Amy: JAY! My Disney buddy!!! So I didn’t know Raffy and Jay Bee were going to expose me in that all or nothing tribal for being at Disney lol I was trying to keep it on the DL. Otherwise I would have freaked out more with you over WDW and your trip and my upcoming trip the next week haha!!! We have to catch up after this! I adore you and our chats. I hope you don’t have to sleep on any more chairs and you are having a great summer at work! Love your positive energy. You are on your way to big things!

Jodi: Jay, I have so much to say to you both about the game and about you as a person. As an ally, you were so loyal to me even when people were not nice to you about it, and you stood up for me and always had my back. You played your role in the game to perfection and people are mad about it just because you were never actually on the bottom. I’m sorry I had to vote you out because they made me force my hand. I love you to death and I am so glad we got to play this game together. Having this opportunity showed us that we can absolutely do this again and I will be your goat next time we play together. I promise. 

Elle: Colin 🥺🥺🥺💗 When I say I literally almost gave up on this game when you left (Amy can testify). We were a little devious team and it was so much funnn, Amy was the double agent super spy, you were the person on comms with all the connections and gadgets, and I was the nerd in the van planning out the heist routes and typing really fast until I look up really dramatically and say, "I'm in".Also here's the list of book reccs you asked for✨:

The Truly Devious series by Maureen Johnson, it’s a mysteryyyy and it's a lot of fun! A fun little cast of characters to get attached to ^_^

The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde, I mentioned this one before, it's a classic but you can read it in one sitting And it's funny. We love to see it💕 Plus it's pride month and we love Victorian era gay poet/playwright/authors.

Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston, Look. This book is amazing, it is queer🏳️‍🌈 (mlm protag relationship but also way more queer characters), it is well written, it's romantic as hell, it's spicy, I don't know how to describe how good it is I'm getting emo thinking about it read ittttttt 💖 (Casey McQuiston also has a new book out with a wlw relationship and we also love to see thattt✨)

I'll Give You the Sun by Jandy Nelson. Okay soooo this isn't a mystery, but I feel like people into mystery novels would enjoy the way the plot unravels. Also I love this book. That is all ^_^ Also it is queer as well🏳️‍🌈, mlm relationship.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson. Haven't read it, but from what I know about it and what books you said you were into and it's acclaim/reputation, I think you'd be into it.

Generally speaking, I am more in the YA/romance/fantasy side of things but I tried to tailor the list to things I genuinely think you'd enjoy ❤️A joke ^_^: Everyone tried so hard to figure out why Mr. Edwards changed his name to Mr. EvansBut after all these years, it's still a Mr. E

Amy: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭!!!! I won’t even lie here before writing this I spent 20 minutes crying thinking about seeing you at FTC because I am just so sorry. I wanted to sit next to you as you won and I feel like I let you down. I am so sorry for how that round went. I was MAD mad after. When you said you, me, Elle F3 I was all in and when I lost you I made it my mission to get both Elle and myself to the end in your honor. I also regret not grabbing drinks with you in KC because that would have been absolutely hilarious even if our planned tribe fight didn’t pan out hahaha. I loved every second of working with you in this wild game. Your social game is incredible and I am so thankful to you for doing everything you did. I’ll never forget sitting on a 20 minute call with Brayden and Jodi about voting you out, hanging up, and immediately calling you to plan how to keep you safe. Sorry I didn’t tell you about the tricks up my sleeve, too. Thank you for making this game so fun to play that I ignored my family in Disney World. All my love ❤️

Jodi: Colin, I wasn’t quite sure what direction to go with this, but I’ll just be open and honest. I really did want to play this game with you, but after realizing the true threat of you having all of Dennis’ stuff (which was correct), I had to get rid of you not because I didn’t want to play, but just because I wanted my game in my own hands, and with 3 immune advantages, you were able to cruise from F7 to F4 with no risk. Sort of like James in China, you have to blindside them before they cruise to F4. That’s one less guaranteed spot for everybody, and I didn’t want to rely on whether you liked me enough to keep me around. For the same reasons that you were upset with Jared and Jay, I too, did not want to play somebody else’s game. I wanted to put my game in my own hands and that’s what I did. You were not supposed to go at F7, we were just trying to get rid of your idol. I was hoping you’d appreciate the gameplay that I was not willing to rely on riding coattails and be in someone else’s good graces to keep me around. Hopefully I’ve explained this well enough during FTC as well. I had no ill will, just wanted to play my own game, not somebody else’s. For the record, if I didn’t make it back into the game or got voted out again with you at the end, I was going to vote for you to win. You pushed me to play harder and be a better player because I knew you would not be easy to outwit and outplay. I’ve told many people this and I can respect and appreciate being outplayed. 

Elle: Joshhhh, my buddy 💔 I'm really sorry you got rocked out, Amy and I were willing to take the risk of being rocked out but we didn't tell you because you had voted for Colin the round previous. To be clear we were still willing to work with you, but the wound was kind of fresh and it seemed silly to give you sensitive information at the time. You did get past F8 this time! But I am sorry about going to rocks, didn't mean to lose you, king.A bit of humor: What does a panda use to make pancakes?A pan...duhI had multiple cooking themed onessss:A student baked a loaf of bread for home economics class.At the end of the class, his teacher returned the loaf and told him that he had gotten an A.The student said: “Thanks, that’s just what I kneaded.”

Amy: Josh I am so sorry you went out on rocks. I know that is the last way you wanted to go. You probably won’t forgive me but I really didn’t want you to go there. I was aiming for Jodi or Jared, but had already mentally prepared for rocks before the twist was announced. I truly hope you get to play again and not be victim to a twist or rocks. You are an absolutely incredible player which made me cautious and frustrated at times haha! Love your energy and I am manifesting that you get a new job that you absolutely love because you deserve it!

Jodi: We had such an incredible story arc to our games. We weren’t close on Phantom, got in touch on SEES, then grew apart again before my vote out, pulled off a beautiful move at F7, and continued to work together until you got rocked out at 6. You were the surprise blessing to my game. When you approached me at F7, I found light in my game again. You had the same agenda as I did, with the same intentions and same concerns. You gave me a real chance to reintegrate into this game and I’m so happy and grateful that you decided to trust me. On top of that, your energy and personality was super fun and I’m glad we got to have fun writing each other’s names down a couple times. I treasured your trust in me a lot and I really wanted to play to the end with you. I think you’d win the game if you were in my spot today. I hope we continue to be friends and good luck with your new game.

Elle: Thank you for remembering my birthday before Raffy reminded everyone 💛 that was very sweet and in my introduction I literally said if anyone remembered it I'd love them forever and then I proceeded to be on opposing sides with you… oops!

Granted, it wasn't really on purpose, I just happened to not be in that alliance of six people and that happened to kind of decide how lines were drawn for the rest of the game in a way.

Impressed with your sudoku skills, being on a tribal call during graduation (congrats again!), and with your coolheadness, if I had an idol while that chaos one was played you bet I'd be playing it 😂 you had a really good game and I hope you think so too ^_^

A fitting joke: If you keep trying the same sudoku puzzle, you willl eventually solve it.

It's just a numbers game, really.

Amy: Jared! You unintentionally became one of my biggest rivals because you are so good at this game! I envy your way to lie in such a believable way that I had to spend so much time convincing Colin you were lying even though I was copy/pasting your exact plan haha! You are great at challenges and frustrated me to no end when you would ONLY tell me lies. You are so smart and I can’t wait to see what you do next. For the cards that were dealt to you, you had an incredible game. Congratulations on graduating! I hope to see you in another game and actually get to work with you.

Jodi: Dear my beloved idol holder, thank you for being my in-game simp. Thank you for having your idol on deck at all times to use on me at my request :) Jared, by now I would’ve shared with everyone at FTC about our 10 year love affair, but I want you to know just how much playing this game has meant to me. After drifting apart for a good 7 years, I’m glad that Survivor brought us close again last year and that you signed up to do this. I couldn’t have played the game that I ended up playing without you despite you WANTING ME OUT AT F4. I’m glad we did this game before signing up for the show together. I cannot wait to do Blood Vs. Water 3 with you. Basing off of our track record this time, we’re going to kill it :)

Elle: Anastasiaaaaaaaaaa💔 I'm not sure how much left I have to say to you 😅 (I am writing this kinda right after tribal so I was talking to you like an hour ago). Congrats on graduating again!! And congrats on this game kinda jealous of your streak so far 😂 you've literally never done worse than F4 do you know how many people can say that? Not many!! Definitely not me lol.

Here's a dad joke!: How do you handle a redhead's temper?

Gingerly!

Amy: Anastasia you are absolutely incredible and I am so thankful Ginny put us in an alliance together on new Fools because I loved playing this game with you. We went back and forth on working together but every time I was glad we were both still together making it farther in the game. I truly meant when I said I would force fire for you, but I respect your decision. I am so sorry I had to keep things from you so much since you were closer with Brayden and Jodi. I hope to play another game with you because you make it so fun and you are such a great player and your social game is so good! I was so excited when you wanted to flip but I am sorry I couldn’t say yet that I already had. Congratulations on graduating and being absolutely incredible!

Jodi: Anastasia, you are the reason I got to the end, and I owe so much to you. In this game, I’ve had to play so dangerously, and my game heavily relied on having ride or dies have my back. When I came back in, we talked immediately about me throwing out your name and you writing my name down, but we got together instantly and made magic happen. You had my back and I had yours. We pulled the most iconic move in this game at the final 7 together (by now you’ll all have heard me talk about it, my plan to create immunity for 3 people) and I truly had you as my ride or die to the end. Thank you so much for playing with me, believing in me and recognizing the game that I played. I love you and can’t wait to be best friends with you and Brayden