#and we all know how much you all love disco!enjolras
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ilovemybarricadebabies · 2 years ago
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Just throwing this out there for those of you who didn’t catch on. Topher is meant to be in a tribe like “Hair”. That’s the reason for the costume, the hair, and the “let’s get naked” line from the trailer.
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and if not rent, then Les Mis! hehe all the same questions but change X to Eponine & Cosette. <3
Well, at least you know that I have answers for this one. You have an entire sideblog as proof. xD
Y) Have you seen the show?
YES. Not only I have watched the 2012 movie, the Madrid proshoot and a couple of the staged concerts, but also a few months ago I took a whole week off work to take a plane and go see in live with my dear mutual @pumpkinspice-prouvaire. And it was so good, I cried almost all the way through. I want to do it agaaaaaain. :(
Z) When did you discover the show?
Well, this is a funny story. I technically knew the novel before the musical (I watched the movie almost two years late because I was finishing the novel first), and I wasn't a big fan. Then I watched the movie, and I thought there was a good musical buried beneath the shitty sound, but I didn't bother to check. And then in 2021, I listened to the Original French Concept Album and I fel in LOVE. And here I am, a year and a half later, with 15 fics and an entire sideblog about it. ^^
X) Make me choose- Cosette or Éponine?
Éponine. All my respect for Cosette, who is a better character than we give her credit for, but I'm just too aro for this shit. Every time she goes "can someone fall in love so fast" I feel the urge to answer "no, no you can't". x)
And 'On my own' is AMAZING.
C) Favorite song?
Depending on the mood, it's a toss between 'At the end of the Day' and 'Bring him Home'. 'At the End of the Day' is amazing and it pumps me up, and 'Bring him Home' makes me tear up.
Unless we're taking into consideration the Concept Album, in which case the answer is 'L'Air de la MisĂšre', hands down.
A) Favorite character?
*side-eyes their sideblog, which is literally called @aromantic-enjolras, and the Enjolras cosplay they put on to go see the show* Enjolras. My dear beloved aromantic revolutionary. How much I love you, both you and your French disco singer alter-ego.
Special mention to Steven Hall's Grantaire, who lives rent-free in my brain just because of how weird his performance was. (In a good way, he did a great job, it's just not the Grantaire I'm used to)
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tomwambsmilk · 2 years ago
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2 8 33&34 for music asks <33
2. what's your favourite album
This is SO tough... but I think my all-time favourite is probably the soundtrack to the "Heathers" Broadway musical. I discovered it in 2019, and all the songs on it ended up at the top of my Spotify Wrapped list that year. I love showtunes in general but that album in particular is phenomenal; Barret Wilbert Weed has THE most incredible vocal range, and "Dead Girl Walking" just blows me away every time I listen. I also can't get over the potent combination of obsession and rage and borderline insanity in Ryan McCartan's rendition of "Meant to Be Yours", it gives me chills!
I do have to give an honourable mention to "Death of Bachelor" by Panic! at the Disco. I know it's not cool to like P!ATD's more recent stuff, but I honestly think that album is Brendon Urie's best work. It feels incredibly coherent as an album, and there is a sort of narrative - or at least character development - tracking from the first song to the last. I generally don't listen to albums as albums if they aren't musicals, but this is one that I almost always listen to in order and in one shot because it just feels wrong to do otherwise. I can't pick a favourite song because I love all of them equally!
8. tell me about your favourite band
As I answer these I realize how much of my musical taste hovers around musicals, lmao. I don't know that I have a favourite band per se, because my musical taste tends to be all over the map, and often I'll only like a few songs from a single artist. The only two non-musical artists where I've actually listened to a lot of their work deliberately are P!ATD and Set it Off.
BUT if we expand this to my favourite artist I'm going to cheat a little and talk about my favourite actor, Ramin Karimloo. I first came across him as the Phantom in the 25th anniversary performance of Phantom of the Opera at Royal Albert Hall, and I became OBSESSED. The raw charisma!!!! The energy!!!!! The amount of emotion he can pack into a line!!! I can't even pick a single moment in the show because every single one is so good. "Music of the Night" gives me goosebumps, though, and also the way he screams in the finale???? DELICIOUS. (At about 10:00-11:00 in this video if you want to know what I mean. I have A Thing for musicals where the lead male singers Just Fucking Scream at a certain point. "Jekyll and Hyde" did this A LOT.) Also the sexual tension in this performance he and Sierra Boggess did at the 2012 BRIT awards just takes me out at the knees. He got a TON of well-deserved critical acclaim for that performance. You used to be able to find the whole show on youtube, but it disappeared a little while ago and I haven't found another free version anywhere.
He also sang the part of Enjolras in the 25th anniversary concert of Les Mis, and is IMO the best Enjolras of all time, no exception. He played Gleb, the general guy, in the Anastasia musical, and even though I have mixed feelings about the musical as a whole his numbers, especially "Still/The Neva Flows (Reprise)" give me chills. One of the greatest nights of my life was getting to go to Toronto with my high school drama class to see him perform LIVE as Jean Valjean in the Mirvish Circuit Les Mis performances. I had a full crush just on his voice when I was in high school <3 And the craziest thing about him is that he has really minimal formal vocal training - his voice just DOES THAT!!! I'm in love with him I truly am
(A couple years ago when of the new guys at my work, who I'm now good friends with, casually mentioned that he knows Ramin Karimloo personally - his brother runs a children's theatre school in Toronto, and Ramin apparently loves to come in and work with the kids and then invite them to his shows. Anyways when he told me that I almost threw up.)
33 + 34. Do you collect CDs and/or vinyls
I don't, but I would if I had a little more disposable income. I'd LOVE to collect vinyl, really well-recorded vinyl has SUCH a gorgeous sound - one of my college roommates had a record player and a bunch of albums and I absolutely loved it. I used to collect CDs when I was in high school, and so I do have several kicking around - a lot of 80s stuff, which is what I was into then, so ABBA, Joan Jett, and the Beastie Boys. I also have a CD recording of "The Nutcracker" by George Balanchine that I love and listen to every Christmas season. Unfortunately I'm currently a hardcore spotify gal, if only because I listen to too much music to buy it all, but I do try to purchase the albums that I really love, especially with smaller artists.
send me some asks about music!
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thevagueambition · 3 years ago
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Tagged by @everyonewasabird - thanks!
1) how many works do you have on AO3?
48
2) what’s your total AO3 word count?
207,828
3) how many fandoms have you written for and what are they?
Let me go count 😂 I tend to write oneshots for random things then never write more for that fandom (when it even has what can be called a fandom lol)
Hmm, something like 24?
Les Mis and Harry Potter are definitely what I’ve written for the most. I’ve written a fair bit of Star Wars stuff as well, but most of that is unpublished wips.
4) what are your top five fics by kudos?
Oh god, I don’t like the first two anymore
1. Mr. Harry Potter, a trans guy!Harry ficlet (this was originally just a headcanon post)
2. Practice, a B99 bi trans guy!Jake ficlet
3. Aching for You, MDZS Wangxian porn with plot (that novel blue balled me lmao)
4. Just Like That, Disco Elysium Harry/Kim (I still really like this one, it was one of the first in that tag too)
5. Handsome as ever, Doctor Who fic where Thirteen and her companions meet Jack Harkness (written before his canon reappearance)
5) do you respond to comments? why or why not?
Usually, yeah. Not if it’s just a heart of a single word comment, though. Not that I don’t appreciate those comments, there’s just not really anything to respond to. If someone does it on every chapter of a longer fic, I might go like “thanks for taking the time to comment!” on one of them to show that I appreciate it.
6) what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
Hmm, I’m more of a hurt/comfort than outright angst sort of guy... particularly in terms of endings, I really like things to be really angsty but then end on that note of “things are going to be okay”?
That said, it’s probably In Other Circumstances, a fic based on the movie Joyeux NoĂ«l, which is already fairly angsty, given the subject matter (that time during WW1 opposing armies celebrated Christmas together). That, or the Dumbledore fic To Be At Peace.
7) do you write crossovers? if so what is the craziest one you’ve written?
Not really. I do have a little bit of a Les Mis/Order of the Phoenix mash-up where Dumbledore’s Army do a student activism after Dumbledore is sacked (Lamarque is dead!) lying around somewhere, but I think that’s about it. God, that was a good idea though. I should get back on that some day.
8) have you ever received hate on a fic?
I think I once got one from a terf on that trans!Harry one but it was pretty vague lol
9) do you write smut? if so what kind?
Yeah, occasionally. I have a lot of kinks in the bdsm area of things, so that’s always pretty apparent in the smut I write. I just think power dynamics are sexy lmao
A lot of the smut I’ve written is original work stuff though, so that’s not up in the same place as my fanfic.
10) have you ever had a fic stolen?
Doubt it
11) have you ever had a fic translated?
Yes, Just Like That was translated into Chinese.
I’ve also personally translated a Odin/Loki fic I wrote in Danish into English. Fun fact, it’s way harder to translate than if I’d written it in English in the first place. I like to write fic in Danish where it makes sense to, though.
12) have you ever co-written a fic before?
Nope. I’ve partcipated in events where I’ve drawn and the other person written, but never co-written. Frankly I’m not even sure how that works.
13) what’s your all-time favourite ship?
Gah, idk. All-time, huh? I shift between fandoms too much for that.
Obviously I ship Enjolras/Grantaire a lot and have for a long time, but then I’m also super particular about what I want that to look like lol.
I still really love Sirius/Remus even after all these years. Disco Elysium’s Harry/Kim deserves mention here as well, although that’s a lot newer, so it’s difficult to talk about in an “all-time” sense.
Despite not really caring about any aspect of Marvel anymore, I also still really love Matt/Foggy from the Netflix version of Daredevil.
14) what’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
A lot of unposted stuff 😂 Maybe once I finish Elysium I’ll pick one of those up again... If it’s a wip I care about, I won’t start posting it till I have a good sense that I’ll continue being able to update.
15) what are your writing strengths?
Hmm, I think I’m good at inserting myself into the mindset of the protagonist. This is also why I practically never write alternating pov, I’m filtering everything through that protagonist so shifting around would be harder. Dialogue tends to come easily to me as well.
16) what are your writing weaknesses?
Descriptions, moving characters around in space in particular. On a more meta level, plotting things out to the right degree where I still actually want to write it but I’m also going in a particular direction. Just... plot, in general, really.
17) what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
Generally speaking, if my character speaks the language in question, the dialogue will be rendered in the same language as the rest of the text with a dialogue tag like “he said in German” or w/e. If they do not, the dialogue will be rendered in the actual language being spoken.
Of course this is also hugely guided but what languages I personally speak. I will never use google translate for something like that because I personally find it infuriating when people do that lmao. It’s like saying “Hey, you, who actually speak this language? This isn’t for you. Fuck you. This is just here for flavor. Surely no-one who actually speaks this language will ever come across this.” I’m sure that’s not what most people who do that are thinking, but that’s what it feels like to read. So I won’t do that.
I can’t recall if I’ve done this in anything that’s up anywhere, but if I wanted to include a foreign phrase I would either use Danish, use triple checked German or ask someone I know who speak a given language about the phrase in that language. Or, you know, just use an established quote.
An exception is Latin, particularly for Les Mis fic, where I follow the brick’s habit of rendering Latin untranslated, despite the pov character understanding it (but again, these are always established phrases).
If I wrote something in Danish taking place in the modern day, I would render English untranslated as well, since that is just how young Danes talk and I can assume that 99.99% of potential readers will be able to understand it either way (this, I think we can assume, is also what was going on with Latin at the time Hugo was writing).
18) what was the first fandom you wrote for?
Probably Harry Potter. That, or Avatar: The Last Airbender. I don’t really remember. The first thin I put on FFnet was certainly Harry Potter, though.
19) what’s your favourite fic you’ve written?
Predictably it’s On the Path to Elysium. As I’ve mentioned before, I wasn’t really able to write long things before Elysium. Most of my fics are oneshots and while I really like oneshots, I had long been frustrated that I never managed to get any of my longer ideas off the ground. Elysium represents a lot of growth for me as a writer.
Apart from that, like I said, I’m still very fond of Just Like That, if nothing else then because I wrote it in an emulation of how the game itself is written.
I tag @thebearmuse @teddy-stonehill @antirococoreaction (no pressure ofc, just if any of you think it looks fun)
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discoenj · 5 years ago
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enjolras!!
First impression: how do i pronounce his name? can i just call him e? i can’t,,, pronounce his name. we need to google it. but what if that’s not the right pronunciation? is that... disco music???? oh my god he’s going to get himself killed  Impression now: he can be a bit... harsh doesn’t feel like the word i’m looking for, but it’s the closest one that comes to mind. but he’s also devoted, and a great friend, and puts his all into what he does. he genuinely wants a better world. also, i love him.  Favorite moment: does every moment count? no? okay, uh... i really liked when, in the movie, the national guard are like “who’s there” and he shouts “french revolution!” back. i also REALLY LOVED his “citizen, my mother is the Republic” you DORK. that entire scene is just. so iconic. i also liked the “be serious” “i am wild” scene, again, that’s just. great. and then there was when they shot jehan prouvaire and he turns to javert and says that because of that, they’re going to kill him. then there’s when he dies, everything with that. it’s just,,, very well done. heartbreaking.  Idea for a story: unfortunately, i don’t think i have any right now?  Unpopular opinion: i can’t really think of any, again, i don’t know of any off the top of my head Favorite relationship: i really really love his friendship with all of les amis, honestly. combeferre and courfeyrac? yes, wonderful, they all help balance each other out. him and feuilly? amazing, great, i love them so much.  Favorite headcanon: okay so you know that one where he like. doesn’t drink coffee that often, and it’s usually hot chocolate, but he lets people think it’s coffee? for some reason that one’s stuck with me, i don’t know why. i have a lot i like though
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capitanogiorgio · 8 years ago
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Random question about European musicals: - Your top 3 (+ why + did you see it live + any random anecdote about them?) - Des bons musicals en français? Parce que j'aime bien ça mais j'en connais pas des masses qui sont en français je me dis ce serait l'occasion d'en voir quelques uns
OOOOOH : I like that one ! Hmmmm
 Let’s exclude West End for this one, otherwise I’ll never get to a top three
Top 3 (in no particular order)
Notre Dame de Paris  (special mention Roméo & Juliette et Starmania)
Tanz Der Vampire
Les MisĂ©rables (I mean at the starting point it’s french, though I do admit I very much prefer the 1991 version with the additions of the West End adaptation) and although it’s an adaptation as well, I love Dracula Das Musical especially with Thomas Borchert and Uwe Kröger. (special mention : Rebecca das Musical | I’m only discovering german musicals tbh and I really like what I heard so far but I have not listened much to Rebecca even though I like what I’ve heard and read so far)
Reasons / Live / Anecdote
NDdP : First I grew up with this soundtrack. The first musical soundtrack I’ve heard was NDdP (and Starmania and then came R&J). I was basically in love and crushing over the whole cast. I did not understand everything and every word but I knew half of the concept album by heart. I think it’s a whole as well, I love the music, the lyrics and growing up and opening myself to the world I realized how the story was still relevant today (that’s why I love Hugo) and how the staging was incredibly smart in this way. I have not seen it live yet, but I have my ticket for when they’ll tour near my hometown in April so soon ! As for an anecdote. Hmmmm
. I find it funny that Garou first auditionned for Frollo. Idk why but sometimes I imagine this and I really have either a hard time picturing it or laughing too hard.
TDV : why I like it. Let’s be completely honest, the first time I heard about it was when they played it at Mogador. And there was this promo on TV and I was not really watching but then I turned suddenly “Wait, isn’t this Total Eclipse of the Heart ?????” I was really confused. I let it go for a while, not giving anther thought but later on I was skyping with my bet friend and it came to my mind again and went to search the summary and see if I could like it. I found some part really great so I read it aloud to my best friend and really he’s not a musical enthusiast but I was pretty curious and still to this day we have to watch it together (I mean I’ve seen it but not yet with him xD). What I like in this is the character of Sarah and her “yeah whatever” attitude towards Alfred, she makes her own decisions and I like that. I love the character of Herbet as well and I love the music as well. I don’t have any anecdote though I saw a picture of Christopher Lee and Thomas Borchert after the opening night of TDV in 2009 (?) and apparently Lee really likde the musical and I just like this because I admire Christopher Lee in many ways not only for his acting career and yeah. Oh and I’ve not seen it live either. Only bootlegs.
Dracula Das Musical : I discovered the musical only a couple months ago. I had heard Thomas Borchert in TDV and I really liked his voice so I looked up his other credits and I found a video of Die VerfĂŒhrung of the Graz production of the musical and I loved it a lot. Loved the music, loved the cast and since I don’t speak German but it’s still close to English I try to decipher and try to understand what they mean and whenever I’m correct or not far from the turth I’m just “yay \o/ !” and so it fuels my want to learn German. I have not seen it live either but there’s the pro-shot video of the Graz production on YT so it’s planned on my “to-watch” list for very soon. The only anecdote I know about this musical is that this song, Zu Ende, was written specifically for Thomas Borchert and Uwe Kröger. In the original version Dracula and Van Helsing don’t have a duet or a song together and Thomas and Uwe are two of the most famous names in the German musical industry and it would have been a crime not to have them both singing in the same song so here.
French Musicals / Musicals in French Rec
it really all depends on what you search in a musical, the story, the songs, the musics, but I’ll give a list of the ones I like, but bear in mind it’s only my view and that there are plenty others that can interest you ;) !
Notre Dame de Paris (x) : my all-time favourite french musicals and even in my all-time favourite musicals list period. Amazing songs and lyrics, great music, amazing cast, simple yet brilliant staging and choreography. I love this musical I know most of the songs by heart and ugh did I mention I LOVE THIS MUSICAL ????
Starmania (x) : the second musical I heard when I was very young. I love the story and the songs are really great. One of the very first musical in France departing itself from “opĂ©rette” (hence the “opĂ©ra rock” mention).
RomĂ©o & Juliette, de la Haine Ă  l’Amour (x) : After NNdP and Starmania I heard R&J. Someone had gifted it to my older brother but he never listened to it. So I sneaked into his room and took the CD and listened to it. I was in love. I listened to it all the time, knew all the concept album by heart and developped a crush on FrĂ©dĂ©ric Charter aka The Prince. I loved the songs, loved the costumes, the story, great, great I loved it.
Le Roi Soleil (x) : not amazing but not bad it’s okay I guess. I liked it when i watched the DVD a few years ago. I only know the singles for this one though. Beautiful costumes and some good songs (some that are not well known like Entre Ciel et Terre)
ClĂ©opĂątre, La DerniĂšre d’Egypte (x) : not on the same as the first three, but better than Le Roi Soleil for me. Great choreography, strong point of this musical and actual poc playing poc roles. Not exceptional but interesting to watch.
Le Petit Prince (x) : not as well known as the others but really poetic and Daniel Lavoie A++++. It’s really too bad it’s not known more. I bought the DVD recently so I can watch it again soon.
Oliver Twist, Le Musical (x) : it’s a new french musical, it’s playing now at La Salle Gaveau in Paris and I’d love to see it but I bought the cast album and it’s amazing ! Very broadway-like I feel the need to spread this musical whenever I can !!!
Les MisĂ©rables (french concept album 1980 & 1991 revival cast) : if I’m honest it’s my all time favourite musical (did I mention I love Hugo’s work ?). The french concept album is pretty interesting and otherwise known as Disco!Jolras (you’ll see why). The 1991 revival cast contains all the new songs added in 1985 for the West End production and the new arrangements. I really love the 1991 revival production and I’m so pissed it did not receive the success it deserved. The 1991 cast has my favourite Marius, JĂ©rĂŽme Pradon, he’s the cutest and Julien Combey as Enjolras is so convincing and good ! Great Javert too !!
Mamma Mia! (x) : don’t judge me but I love this musical, I’m always a sucker for ABBA and the french version was actually great ?? I think the translations were actually pretty good and JĂ©rĂŽme Pradon’s in it so that’s a plus. (I have the french cast album if you want, send me an IM and I’ll give you a link to dl it).
Special mention to Le Bal des Vampires (TDV) and La Belle et La BĂȘte as well that have good french productions.
Thank you so much for this ask !!
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thevagueambition · 5 years ago
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I was tagged by @antirococoreaction to talk about five male characters I love
(God, only five? However will I choose between my boys >_< ?!)
This is most certainly not going to be a literary as your offerings, lmao. When it comes to literary fiction I mostly like Kafka and Kafka, by the nature of his writing, writes thoroughly unlikable characters.
This got way too long bc I’m incapable of not gushing about my faves when given the chance lol 
Zuko from Avatar: The Last Airbender
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It is my enduring opinion that if you want to see a redemption arc done right, look at Zuko’s arc in The Last Airbender. He’s a scared, abused kid who managed to build up personal morals in a system that discouraged them, and was harshly punished for daring to voice them. He’s someone who always wanted to be good, but struggles with defining what good is, given that his culture and upbringing has taught him one thing, but his heart (and his uncle) tells him another, and his new experiences reinforces that. After he figures out what “good” looks like, he’s always held accountable for his past actions. He makes amends, and he accepts it, for the most part, when people aren’t ready to receive them. His anger issues, as well as how he sees himself as someone who had to be hardworking because he isn’t talented (however far from the truth that may or may not be in reality) are also aspects of him that appeal to me and indeed that I relate to. 
Anakin Skywalker from Star Wars
My love for Anakin is not dissimilar to my love for Zuko, though the quality of the writing in question certainly is. I love an edgy boy, is what I’m getting at, I guess :’D More seriously, Anakin’s story is ultimately one about control, which is a subject that interests me quite a bit. Anakin is never, at any point, really in control of his own life. He’s never really truly free. He’s born a slave, he joins the Jedi Order and he becomes Palpatine’s apprentice. He always exists within rigid systems of control, until his very lasts moments with Luke before he dies. With how Palpatine essentially groomed him, thinking of Anakin as equally a victim of Palpatine and a perpetuator of his (metaphorically speaking) abuse is also interesting to me. Certainly his clearly distorted thinking (eg convincing himself he can’t trust Obi-Wan, for instance) is also hugely important to his appeal to me. Also? He’s SO EXTRA I can’t with him lol 
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(That’s your LIFE SUPPORT SYSTEM you turned off, Anakin!!! I know you’re depressed and dissociated and also The Drama but damn!!!!!!)
Nicodemus Ravens from The Shamer Chronicles (Skammerens bĂžrn)
The Shamer Chronicles is a series of Danish fantasy books for kids, and probably the most popular books of that type (particularly the first book, The Shamer’s Daughter). Nico is a major character, though never a POV one. 
Nico was, essentially, abused by his father for not living up to the male gender role. He didn’t want to learn to use a sword, he didn’t want to kill, and his father hated him for it. As a result, he’s a teenage alcoholic and profoundly at war with himself. He constantly have other people telling him narratives about who he is/should be: first, he’s the younger son who should bring his father glory, then he’s the heir unfit for the throne, then he’s, depending on the political position of the character in question, either a monstrous murderer who must be killed by the glorious leader or the rightful heir to throne, a hero ready to bring war to his enemy and liberate his people, then rule them in benevolence.
Nico doesn’t want to be any of those things. He knows who he is, is stubborn about it, but also can’t shake the belief that his relative pacifism is really just cowardice. I’m just going to quote one of my favourite scenes here (forgive the translation, it’s my own, I don’t have the official one at hand):
“[...] They want a hero, I think.”
“Is that so bad? It’s better than being a monster, at any rate.”
“You think? Have you noticed how often heroes die in battle? Of course everyone mourns them afterwards and write beautiful ballads about them, but the heroes remain dead. Stone-dead. And I’m in no hurry to get on my white steed and start slaughtering people until someone better or luckier than I sticks a sword in me. No, thank you.”
He looked both obstinate and shameful, as if he thought he really should get on his white steed and all of that. I could understand why he didn’t want to die, and yet
 Well, I think I’d always expected him to return to the Lowlands to fight Drakan at some point.
“What do you want, then?” [...]
“I just want to be me,” he whispered. “Is that so terrible? I just want to be Nico and not a lot of other people’s hero or monster.”
Anyway there are Two Crimes when it comes to Nico: the fact he isn’t gay in canon and how so many adaptations turns him into the Generic Fantasy Hero he’s a very conscious subversion of in the books (the other principle male character is essentially someone who’s hurt by toxic masculinity as someone who buys into it, while Nico ofc is hurt by it because he doesn’t/can’t, so the series certainly had an opinion about it). 
Albus Dumbledore from Harry Potter
Dumbledore is, to me, someone who chose what was good for the world over his own happiness. He chose to be the one to dirty his hands, the one two make the terrible decisions, do the terrible things, that were necessary in the battle against facism. There is something very brave and admirable about that to me. It’s not that he never did anything wrong, he certainly did, but again, I think he was very aware of the terrible things he was doing, and part of the reason he keeps everything so close to his chest is because he doesn’t want anyone else to have to make those decisions, to have to feel that blood stain their hands. Dumbledore loves the people in his care profoundly, he loves Harry profoundly. And it kills him to have, as Snape puts it, “brought him up like a pig for slaughter”. 
Whether something is morally justified and whether it’s necessary to prevent evil are two different questions, and I don’t think Dumbledore feels particularly justified, but I do think he does what he perceives to be necessary to prevent facism. And hates himself for the decisions he takes along the way. And all of that comes back to, to some extent, his survivor’s guilt over the death of Arianna and the profound wake up call that was Grindelwald 1) turning on his family 2) being a very violent fascist, rather than just a theoretical one like teenage!Dumbledore was. In his mind, Dumbledore is already condemned for what happened when he was 18, so it’s better that it be he who takes the terrible things upon himself than an “innocent.” It’s better that he try to atone. Dumbledore is working towards a redemption he never (to his mind) arrives at. 
In regards to his sexuality, Dumbledore was certainly written with the trope of a “tragic old closeted gay” in mind, but of course JKR never made anything much canon aside from his “flamboyant” sense of style (that the movies have ROBBED us of >:( ) and hobbies, so to a certain extent, I get to ignore that homophobic intent. In the books themselves, the only thing you can really read between the lines is that Dumbledore was in love with Grindelwald, not whether it was 1) reciprocated 2) acted upon, so with only the canon, we also get to mitigate some of the Implications of “Dumbledore dated Wizard Hitler for a while”.... 
I mean I do Love Mess(tm) so Dumbledore having that terrible wake up call is certainly also part of the appeal for me. Personally I enjoy the interpretation that Grindelwald deliberately manipulated Dumbledore’s feelings. 
Captain Flint/James McGraw from Black Sails
BE GAY DO CRIME BE GAY DO CRIME BE GAY DO CRIME BE-- *coughs*
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As you might guess from my description of Dumbledore, a lot of the reasons I love Flint are similar to why I love Dumbledore (and Solas, but we won’t go in to Solas rn lol). Flint is also someone who chooses to do the terrible, necessary things, who chooses the fight over his personal moral cleanliness. In a more obvious and extreme way than Dumbledore, certainly, but the principle is essentially the same. Of course, Flint’s fight is personal in a completely different way from how Dumbledore’s is. Flint’s fight is simoultaneously his revenge, a fight against the corrupt system that ruined his life and a fight for something better. Dumbledore is defensive, Flint is offensive. 
The self-integrity he has is truly amazing. He’s cast aside by everyone but Miranda, and yet he never starts thinking he has anything to apologise for. To ask for a pardon would be to ask for forgiveness, and he doesn’t think he needs to be forgiven. Not for loving Thomas, not for anything he did while he was still English. He perceives the reality of the situation, he sees what is right and what is wrong, and he knows that he is the wronged party. He stares at the behemoth of the entire social structure of his world and says: No. You move. I am not in the wrong. England should apologise to me.
Flint is my angry gay dad and I love him. 
I tag (as always, completely optional ^^ ): @teddy-stonehill​ @thebearmuse​ @andvaka​ @solitarelee​ @gallifreyanathearts​ @sinni-ok-sessi​ @melle93​ @papanden​ @seimsisk​
I feel a bit dishonest leaving Grantaire off of this list, lmao, but I talk about him enough as it is. 
Other honorables mentions go to: Enjolras (Les Mis), Captain Jack Harkness (Doctor Who/Torchwood), Solas (Dragon Age), Fitzwilliam Darcy (Pride and Prejudice), Kim Kitsuragi (Disco Elysium), Harry Potter, Remus Lupin (Harry Potter) and my soap boys Robert Sugden (Emmerdale), Richard “Ringo” Beckmann (Unter Uns) and Ben Mitchell (Eastenders). 
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