#and uh like herbs for inspiring my LORD

[gonzodangerfeels]

Crystal Red Serpent though

Oh right the moon though.

Time is a fascinating vector

smh

This shouldn't be retired. Soon if autocorrect doesn't work

[mornyavie]

Explanations for the losing topics under the cut. And yes you CAN talk to me about any of these that pique your interest. I will be so happy to talk about them.

You may recognize the phrase The Riddle of Steel from old Conan the Barbarian stuff, but it was coopted for a TTRPG written in the early 2000s. The writers were avid reenactment/swordfighting fans, and their goal with it was to make a sword-and-sorcery game with big emphasis on the "sword" part of that - hence getting one of their martial arts organizations to put their stamp on it!

It has an incredibly complex and expressive system for melee duels; it really forces you to understand the strengths and weaknesses of your weapons and training. When it's good, it's really good, and I've had some of my favorite experiences at the table with it. But it was also written by a couple European-history nerds in 2000 who were eventually scammed by their shady publisher, and it shows on all accounts; the editing ranges from bad to atrocious, and the included setting from boring to offensive. I can't really recommend anyone play it, but the bones are good enough to inspire a community-driven rewrite after the publishers screwed them over; I haven't checked out Blade of the Iron Throne, but maybe do if this sounds interesting.

.

Lord of the Changing Winds has the distinction that no one I've recommended it to has ever finished it. Uh. I'll just go find a blurb.

Little ever happens in the quiet villages of peaceful Feierabiand. The course of Kes' life seems set: she'll grow up to be an herb-woman and healer for the village of Minas Ford, never quite fitting in but always more or less accepted. And she's content with that path -- or she thinks she is. Until the day the griffins come down from the mountains, bringing with them the fiery wind of their desert and a desperate need for a healer. But what the griffins need is a healer who is not quite human . . . or a healer who can be made into something not quite human.

What to say, what to say. It hits a lot of unusual points in the emotional and interpersonal journeys of the protagonists, and as someone frequently accused of unusual emotional and interpersonal behavior (<- aromantic) I like it a lot. And also there's griffins. Genuinely fresh and thought out magic system. Thoughtful portrayals of people with genuinely different priorities. It's good.

.

Look Moonscars is objectively, like, fine, but it's also on sale on Steam right now! So what's to lose!

You'll find more involved and challenging combat elsewhere, but the smooth, creative animations make for a very satisfying experience, and the story is fun to unravel, and the visuals are super pretty unless you're opposed to stylistic monochromaticism.

For some reason the community reviews used to tend to have a lot of hate, much of which I find undeserved, though it seems to have turned around a bit these days. Some people think it's too easy, others think it's unfairly difficult, a lot of people think it should be Hollow Knight instead (read: more platforming). I've run into a lot of that trying to find places to talk about the game, so I often wish I had more people to talk about it positively with.

.

um

So the universe is made of atoms, right?

And atoms are made of protons, neutrons, and electrons. You may also have heard that protons and neutrons are both made of quarks.

Electricity and magnetism come with positive or negative charge. A magnet has two sides, and depending on their orientation two magnets can either attract or repel each other. Protons are positively charged, so they're attracted to electrons, which are negative.

Quarks have a more complicated force system going on with *three* charges that can attract or repel each other, in addition to their negative versions. For lack of a better idea, they're referred to as colors - more or less in analogy with the idea of mixing primary colors together. Since there's three colors, protons (and neutrons) are made of three quarks each - one of each color.

like this

Color -> chromo -> chromodynamics. Large-N chromodynamics is when you pretend that instead of three colors there are a lot of them. It turns out that "a lot" is a much easier number to deal with than "three," so this can be used to learn some useful ideas about how collections of quarks should behave.

.

Look there's a lot of wierd and bad supplement books in the D&D Third Edition Ecosystem. Magic of Incarnum has the probablem that it tries to introduce an entirely new mechanic to the game - essentia - which means that it interfaces poorly with other material and has whacky balance. The esoteric vocabulary cements its place as a minor meme. You can sometimes invoke it to complete unexpected character ideas, but there's no way your DM will let you do it unless you are, for some reason, already playing with the roles from this single obscure supplement, so it's fun to joke about.

You use your essentia to shape soulmelds and bind them to your chakras.

(yes, it uses the word chakra for this)

Translation; basically, you get a pool of points you can use to either power racial/class features or make yourself temporary magic items. The magic item body slots are inexplicably recast as chakras, and if you bind one of these special "magic items" to that body slot you can't wear a magic item there, but you get extra benefits.

In addition to the whole chakra thing, it's a woefully underpowered supplement; if you use one of the provided base classes, it's basically pouring all of your class features into getting yourself magic items - leaving you with magic items basically equivalent to those of a normal character, and no class benefits. Ever wanted to be a wizard with no choice but to do kinda shitty melee? Now's your chance!

But you can pull a few neat tricks with it, like using the jump boots to get yourself evasion, which is otherwise tricky to do without rogue or rogue-like levels.

niche joke. ADHD cleric who can't cast abstinence spells because their ritalin counts as a stimulant-

post cancelled I just checked and according to the vow of abstinence feat caffeine DOES count as a stimulant. Unrelatedly ADHD cleric who can't cast Channel Celestial because they ate a chocolate bar yesterday.

[pseudofaux]

You! Are! So! Nice! To! Allow! Me! This! Fantasy! BLESS.

I'd be so happy to see (read) you bathe the King of Heroes™️ in spice (the most exquisite, 🔥🔥 you have to offer for Gilgamesh)? Perhaps a focus on how well he can focus on lording (cherishing/spoiling/gifting) over the one who has earned his favor, in bed? 🥰 Honestly, just here to read your take – in whatever shape or form – on his (A+++) horn over his beloved; HCs or drabble. Darker kinks or not, if it rocks your boat for him, I will gladly take anything. Thank you, thank you, pseu xoxo

For cough inspiration/cheering on for your entire pseu slings 🥳, please have:

Friend, I cannot TELL YOU HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS IDEA (and your brain) (and this gif). Thank you for giving me this incredible playground and vent for my own personal, uh, imaginings. 🥰 ilyssssssm!

(Requests are open through May 1 if you would like to get one in, reader!)

Perhaps the greatest benefit of pleasing a king so well as she has is the chance to feel his fine king’s mattress at her back. She is used to humbler surfaces and far fewer pillows. The mattress on his bed is soft and sweet-smelling, dried grasses and herbs and all the other stuffing practically sublime beneath her.

But above her is the king himself, and he is definitely sublime, and the amusement in his gaze is very warm and gentle and knowing, and it makes her hot. She is so glad her king is not a fake, that he does not boast things he cannot claim. When this golden being boasts, his words are the truth. He can claim anything of earth or of heaven; he is both. And tonight there is an unearthly warmth in his eyes, and every second she thinks she can be calm, that strange heat makes her skin feel like it is being gently tattooed with some great mystery. She will not look away. He told her to look.

“Afraid?” he asks.

“Honored,” she says immediately. If she was forced to go without grain she could sustain herself on her reverence for him.

“What a proper answer. Good,” he tells her, and lifts one of her wrists from her silk-covered belly to his mouth. She wears only a gold belt and the high skirt, split at both sides, in a rich blue. It’s the finest thing she has ever worn but he does not seem to care about it at all. He kisses her below her palm, then licks the kiss, and the gasp she sucks in through her nose makes him laugh. “Relax,” he orders. “You are here because I deemed you worthy. Do you question my judgement?”

“Never,” she swears.

He hums and keeps his eyes on her as he moves his mouth back to her wrist and lightly scrapes his teeth over her pulse. She can feel it jump so strongly she thinks he must feel it, too.

“You did well,” he says graciously, placing her arm back on her belly and leaning over her on his bed. He looms. “Few earn this. Know that you are free to enjoy everything that happens here tonight. I will not tell you so again.”

She stares into his eyes, and knows only a want to look at him and look and look, forever. It is as though two bloodred moons look back at her, vibrant from their place in the sky. Expectant. “Thank you, my king,” she says quietly. “I will keep trying to please you.”

“See that you do,” he mutters as he comes down to her mouth. He does not kiss her, exactly, but he sucks her lower lip into his mouth and gently presses it with his teeth. She already feels like swooning and does not hide the lustful cry that comes out of her open mouth. That is his. It is not her place to deny him.

He stays above her, sublime and regal. But he turns her what feels like every which way through the night: onto her side where he grinds into her, on her back where he holds her by the hips and blesses her breasts with suckles and teeth. On her stomach, where he hauls up her hips to come close to him in heaven and pounds into her so fiercely the pillows do nothing to muffle her cries of pleasure. He laughs when she finally stops trying.

“There it is. Let them all hear. My entire great city in every direction, you let them know who is king.”

“Gilgamesh!” she cries.

“Louder!”

“Gilgamesh!” she screams as he presses into her and grinds himself deeper, so deep if he were not half god she knows it would hurt. Everything should hurt, but he keeps touching her and it does not. His fingers are unerring and graceful, occasionally tweaking but almost always blessing her with strokes and circles and zigzig patterns that make her legs fall open like an unrolled carpet, something meant for him to walk upon. She can hear the way her body never stops slicking itself for him-- he never lets up, it is always his heavenly mouth or fingers playing her. She did not know she was a lyre but she shakes at his every pluck, whether he uses the fingers of his hand gloved in gold or the naked one.

In moments of rest they feed each other apricots drizzled with honey, bites of cheese and pistachios. There is cold water flavored with roses and sweet wine. He tells her “Do not swallow,” before he kisses some of the wine into her mouth and her head swims as though she has had a full cup too fast. Some leaks out one side of her mouth and he laughs again-- he laughs so often her heart is weak-- and makes great show of cradling her face and licking from her chest up to her lips.

The sky is more purple than black by the time his energy finally wanes, as though he has kept the world alive through the night by staying awake with her. She is ready to bow beside his sweet-smelling bed and stumble away when he tugs her back to his sweaty chest with a huff and tells her she is to sleep there if she does not want to sour his mood. She tells him she would never dare and promptly falls asleep, where her dreams will never be sweeter than the night she has just endured.

She wakes on her stomach at midday, alone. There is one of the king’s tablets, the ones he magics, under her shoulder.

“You are to return to me tonight,” it says. Every slash of the signs is kingly and without hesitation, so when the moon rises that night she does not hesitate, either.

[jazzistolkienfanfics]

Choose - Elves

Hi, I was wondering if you could do an imagine/oneshot with Haldir, Glorfindel and Thranduil. Sorry, I’m a sucker for elves. 🙈

@aduialel​ here you go! i’m sorry it took so long i haven’t had a ton of time and i was really stuck for inspiration (and i altered some of your request fyi)! question: what is your native language that you mentioned?

Type: Imagine Pairings: Haldir x reader, platonic!Thranduil x reader, Glorfindel x reader Summary: Y/N is forced to choose between the three people she loves most Warnings: weird timeline idk when this is set, Word Count: 1379 words

Y/N smiled widely in relief as the Elf’s temperature broke, squeezing a rag of cold water of his forehead. 

He opened his eyes on the white healer’s bed, the cold blue so unlike his personality, and smiled at the s/c face hanging over him.

“Hello, Y/N,” Glorfindel grinned, reaching up to pry the rag from her, almost holding her hand in the process (a thought that made the elleth blush) and spreading it across his head. 

“You need to take better care of yourself,” was her only response as she searched for more herbs in the drawers. “It seems every fight that you end up wounding yourself and then getting sick.”

“Eh, what can I say? I live on the edge.” Glorfindel swung his legs over the edge of the bed, smirking at the healer.

“If that’s what you’d like to call it,” Y/N rolled her eyes, though she flashed a wink at him as she spread a pounded-up mixture of herbs and medicine over a nasty slash on his forearm. “Go on, get outta here.”

“Anything for you, hiril vuin (my lady),” he teased, standing with an unfair amount of grace, tossing his brown-blond hair over his shoulder and sweeping away.

Y/N just shook her head, putting away the jars and bandages she’d taken out. She felt a sudden tap on her shoulder and dropped her store of athelas on the floor. The glass shattered everywhere.

“Goheno nin!” someone frantically apologised, dashing into Y/N’s view and beginning to pick up the pieces. The person who’d tapped her shoulder had been, unsurprisingly …

“It’s alright, Haldir,” Y/N smiled reassuringly. Haldir had no choice but to return it - Y/N’s smiles made everything better. He had been visiting Mirkwood, where Y/N and Glorfindel currently resided. “That was my fault.”

“No, I surprised you, and-” he cut off the word as he reached of the same piece of glass as Y/N, catching her hand instead of the shard. He realised it quickly, an embarrassed smile darting across his face, accompanied by a red tint on his cheeks. “Sorry.”

“Haldir, I don’t know how many times I should tell you, but you don’t need to apologise for everything!” Y/N laughed. She felt a small flutter in her heart as well - he was pretty cute.

Her laugh … Haldir loved it - it made him feel light and happy, as though there was not a worry in the world. They finished cleaning up together, Y/N putting the glass in a basket for the purpose, and turned to smile at Haldir again.

“So, why’d you come down here? Glorfindel just left, if you were after him.”

“I, uh, I actually came here to see how you were holding up,” he admitted. For all his capabilities in battle, he was helpless around this marvel of an elleth. 

Y/N looked down at her feet. “There’s gotta be another reason. Come on, now, don’t spare my feelings, spit it out.”

Haldir sighed. “I was coming down here to say hello, but then your father intercepted me.”

“My father?”

“Yeah, he’s visiting. He wants you to come see him.”

She blew a strand of h/l h/c hair out of her face, shelving the athelas in a new jar and offering Haldir her arm. He gladly took it. 

“Well, then, let’s not delay.”

—

“Ah, you’re finally here, Y/N,” her father said as she swept into Thranduil’s entrance hall with Haldir just behind her. 

“Lord Celeborn,” she said reluctantly, stiffly performing the standard hand-extending greeting. “Lord Thranduil.”

The King of the Woodland Realm winked at her from his throne, his business facade dropping for just a second for him. Y/N also briefly broke face, giving him a tiny quirk of a smirk before turning back to the visitor.

“You needn’t be so formal with me, daughter,” Lord Celeborn replied. 

Y/N just sighed. The last time they had parted ways had not been very pleasant, and she wasn’t exactly thrilled to see her father again. “Alright, Father. What do you want?”

“There is an easy answer to that question.” Celeborn, ever the dramatic, swept towards her, placing his hands on her shoulders. “You must choose a suitor.”

“We’ve been over this!” Y/N cried. “I don’t want to marry yet. And if I did - I want it to be for love!”

“Then I give you an ultimatum,” he said, any benevolence long gone from his voice. “Marry someone of your choice within the next week - or marry someone from Lorien and come back to us.”

With that, he strode from the room, leaving Y/N looking after him in utter shock and horror.

“I don’t know,” Thranduil drawled, one of his legs crossed over the other as he lounged dramatically. “I think that went well.”

Y/N turned very slowly to stare at him, her posture deadly still as she bored holes into his face. Everyone in the room averted their eyes, knowing exactly how Y/N was the only one who could have any effect whatsoever at this point in his life (apart from his son, who wasn’t even there then).

“You mean to tell me that me having my life ruined by my father, who wants me to marry not for love but for his benefit is an example of it ‘going well’?”

Thranduil winced, reconsidering his words. “Well, he gave you a choice.”

She scoffed. “Oh, please, don’t you talk to me about good parenting.”

Y/N wanted to take it back, but he was surprisingly not affected, perhaps taking note of her unfortunate situation. 

“Well, I suppose you’d better choose someone soon then,” Thranduil said. “Sadly, I’m unavailable. Only marry once and all that.”

Y/N had to laugh at him - the drama queen of a king that she loved as she would a brother. There’d been a point when she was younger when she had had a little thing for him - and he was still undeniably attractive - but Y/N was past that now. 

“Oh, yeah, because you’re the only ellon anyone finds attractive.”

He had no response to that but for an indulgent chuckle and a playful, “Out of my throne room, Y/L/N.”

“Whatever my King wishes,” she mock-curtsied, leaving the room.

—

“He made it sound so easy,” Y/N groaned, sitting with her head in her hands on one of the beds in the healing ward. “Find someone and marry them in a couple days.”

It was true - she only had three days left until she married some total slob from Lorien. 

“You’ll figure it out, I promise,” Glorfindel reassured her. 

Y/N stared at the ellon sitting across from her, giving him a weak smile. Next to Glorfindel was Haldir, spinning a knife over his fingers and staring at the shining blade. 

She sighed, standing and rubbing her eyes tiredly. “I’m going to take a walk and clear my head.”

The halls of Mirkwood were empty at the late hour when the moon was high in the sky, and Y/N’s shoes were the only sound echoing off the walls.

She leaned against one, sliding down it and resting her forehead on her curled-up knees, her arms wrapping tightly around herself. 

“What am I going to do?” she asked herself.

A choked breath later, someone raised her chin, and she found herself staring into Glorfindel’s blue eyes. 

“What you always do,” he said. “Figure it out.”  

Unable to stop herself, Y/N threw her arms around him and kissed him. He made a shocked noise, freezing for a second before wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing back with a gentle push.

Y/N pulled back suddenly, breathing rapidly. “Oh. Oh, wow.”

Glorfindel’s eyes were still wide with shock, but he gave a kind of nervous laugh and sweet smile. Y/N thought, with a pang, about Haldir, and about his evident feelings for her. She remembered some of the strange looks she’d caught the two warriors exchanging and realised each was probably as jealous as the other.

But as much as she like Haldir, she knew that her fate with him would be moving back to Lorien.

So she held out her hand to Glorfindel, and asked, “Will you help me figure it out?”

His tiny grin widened, and he accepted her hand. “Of course.”

A/N - I’M SO SORRY I HAD NO INSPIRATION I’M A PIECE OF SHIT IK IF YOU WANNA REQUEST SOMETHING DIFFERENT GO AHEAD

ALSO EVERYONE REQUESTTTTTT!

[eideticmemory]

EVER SINCE NEW YORK IV | MATTHEW GRAY GUBLER

Description: I was messaged saying: “If you don’t write a young Matthew enemies to lovers fic featuring an obsession with sucking on boobs then what’s the point 😔.” So, here it is, folks! The ultimate College!Matthew fic. Cover by @timey-wimey-lovi​!

PART 4! Read Part 3 here!

SOUNDTRACK:

Let Me Know - Clear Eyes.

Friends - Ed Sheeran.

Perfect Places - Lorde.

Word Count: 4,551.

Rating: M.

Warning/Includes: Sexual intercourse, drinking, recreational drug use, a bit of angst.

Fall, Junior Year.

Tisch School of the Arts, 

New York University.

New York City. 

“We’re going out tonight,” Claire said, plopping down on your bed. 

“Oh? We are?” You replied, a notebook in your lap, and your back resting against the pillows.

“Yes. There is a welcome back party on campus tonight and we’re going.”

“I don’t feel like partying,” you sighed. “We just moved back in. There’s still so much left to do, to unpack.”

“Guess what? It’ll be here when we get back. And we’ll have all of tomorrow to decorate. But right now, we’re juniors, we’re thriving, and we’re gonna party!” She did a little dance, her red hair bouncing on her head. 

You giggled, “Fine. Only until midnight! Then, we’re coming right back.”

“Geez, grandma? Midnight? Make it one!”

“Fine, one-thirty.”

“I’ll take it,” she smiled. She hopped out of bed, and turned on her heels, finger guns pointing at you. “Wear that red tube top. Step all the way out, kid. I mean it!”

“Yeah, we’ll see.”

You wore the top. It looked good. Abnormally good. Insanely good. It hugged your body, and accented your breasts, little ruffles handing on the hem. You paired it with a loose pair of jeans, leather boots, and sparkly jewelry. Your hair was pulled out of your face and you applied light makeup. 

“Yes, ma’am!” Claire cheered when she saw you. “For someone who didn’t wanna party, you sure snapped.” 

“Hush,” you blushed. “I just wanna be prepared, y’know, in case we take pictures or run into people.”

Person. Singular. 

You anticipated a high chance of seeing Matthew tonight, and if it was true, it would be your first time seeing each other in person in two months. After week upon week of late night phone calls — full of dirty words, quiet moans, and soft goodnight wishes. With his timezone being three hours behind yours, the two of you set alarms on your phone to talk in the early hours of the morning. Until you fell into this routine of talking every night. First, helping each other get off — sometimes more than once. And then having a sleepy, giggle-filled conversation about anything under the sun. It regularly lasted until one of you fell asleep.

So, yeah. You were eager to see him. Even more eager to get back to his place. Get back underneath him. It’d been a week since you last spoke, both of you being too busy moving back to New York. You ached for him dearly. And you wanted his first reaction to seeing you again to be lustful, intense. The outfit was perfect.

Claire and you walked across campus, arm in arm, skin glowing under the lights, hair blowing in the breeze. The music was palpable, and you could hear it from miles away. The two of you stepped into the dorming building, giggling at the sight of familiar faces, the smell of alcohol and weed, the sound of bass. 

For most of the night it was easy to mingle. You carried a solo cup of alcohol from each room — vodka. Everytime you drank rum, you got horny. It was weird. You couldn’t turn a corner without bumping into someone you knew, be it a dancer, an actor, film student. Being a double major, and active on campus, you knew way too many people. And everyone seemed to be there that night. It took you a good hour to rotate amongst groups. 

“[y/n]?”

You turned around, a smile instantly appearing on your face. “Alex! Oh, my goodness! How are you?”

The dashing boy smiled at you, his hand on your shoulder. “Hey! I’m great, how are you?”

“I’m good, I’m good. I’m currently trying to have a good time despite being tired as hell.”

He laughed, “Well, I see you’ve got some good time juice there, so you’re halfway to freedom. Hey, I forgot to tell you — your performance in the nutcracker last Christmas was incredible. I, uh, I actually went to the spring ballet after that because I was so impressed.”

“Thank you,” you grinned. “I like to inspire people to experience ballet. It’s cool.”

“I was very inspired,” he nodded. “Hopefully we’ll have some more classes together this semester.” 

“Yeah! If not, you know how to reach me.” You bit down on your lip to keep from smiling too wide. He gave you a quick wink, and walked away. 

You instantly began looking for Claire, rushing around the dorm for anyone resembling your friend. You noticed her in the threshold of a room, shoulder leaned against the wall, her arms crossed. You walked up to her, “Claire! Claire, you’re not gonna believe who I just ran into. It was definitely not the reunion I was expecting tonight.” 

Claire was dazed, staring in front of her with a face solid as stone. You very rarely saw her like this, and it freaked you out right away. “Claire? Claire, dude, what’s wrong?” You turned your head to follow her gaze, and your eyes landed on the couch. 

People lined the cushions, and dead in the center was Matthew. His hair had grown out a lot, and he dressed differently. All button down shirts and khaki shorts. With that damn chain tucked in his collar. And beside him was a girl. Hair jet black, a matching black mini dress, paired with sandals. They were kissing. Hot. Heavy. His hand gripping her hair, the other on his thigh. When they seperated, she touched his lips and you felt yourself having a stroke. The giggled at each other and Matthew kissed her cheek. 

“It’s about one-thirty, right?” Claire asked you, her sight not moving. 

You gulped. There was an ache in your chest that made it hard to speak. But you took a deep breath, and release the words, “Yeah. Let’s go home.”

Claire walked around you, heading towards the exit, and you followed. The two of you walked home, silent, arms over each other’s shoulders. In the room, Claire dropped her stuff to the floor,  kicked her shoes off and sat on her bed. You rushed into the space, approached your nightstand and rummaged through it. 

“What are you doing, [y/n]?”

“I’m packing a bowl,” you replied, grabbing your herbs, a lighter and the bowl. 

“Right now? In here?” She gasped.

“Is that okay?”

She sighed, “Yeah. Come share.”

The two of you sat on her bed, thirty minutes later, laying against the wall with your heads staring at the ceiling. Your eyelids were lowered, red, and your breathing was slow. 

“I’m hungry,” Claire said, texting on her phone. “Do we have gummy bears? I want gummy bears. But haribo gummy bears. Not those knocks off we used to buy. And some soda. Soda would be so good right now. My mouth is so dry.”

You stayed quiet, eyes focused on the lights overhead. You couldn’t get the image out of your mind. Matthew. And that girl. Kissing. Touching. 

“Her name is Veronica,” Claire said. 

You turned your hear to her, “Huh?”

“Her name is Veronica,” she repeated. “Or Roni for short.” She rolled her eyes. “She, uh, she’s from Vegas. She went to school with...Gube, actually. They dated.”

“Oh...” you nodded. “Are you...are you okay?”

“I — I, yeah, I’m fine,” she shrugged. “It’s just...really inconvenient of him to go back to her right now.”

“Back to her?”

“They’re together. They’re dating. Apparently they got back together this summer.” 

You furrowed your eyebrows together, a thousand thoughts running through your mind at once. “What do you think about that?” Claire asked. 

“Uh...” You shrugged. “I’m surprised anyone actually touches that boy,” you laughed, the sound coming out broken and sad. 

“Yeah...well...Misty says Roni is a big one for Gube. That, um, necklace he wears? She gave it to him years ago. He never took it off.” 

You nodded, “Yeah,” your voice cracked. “Well, that’s...that’s some heavy fixation there.” 

“[y/n]...”

“I should shower. I’m gonna shower.” You went to get off the bed, but Claire grabbed your wrist. You turned to her, and she pushed your hair out of your face. 

“I’m really upset about this, kid,” she said. “Can you...can you just lay with me for a bit?” 

You sighed, gave her a small smile and leaned in to hug her. She held you close, placing one hand on your head and the other on your rest. And she let you rest your head on her chest, as you let silent tears roll down your cheeks. 

Monday morning, you got up at 5 in the morning. You spent 2 hours in the ballet studio, twirling and dancing until your feet went numb. When you returned home, Claire was still asleep and you took a quick shower. You tried on ten different outfits, applied makeup, spent a long time on your hair. You made breakfast, checked for any assignments, surfed social media. And still had an hour before class. 

You chose to walk around campus, locate all your classes, grab some coffee, and then you headed to your first class. Walking through the building, you sipped on your drink, moving absentmindedly roaming the halls. Suddenly, a hand reached out and pulled you into a storage closet. Your scream was cut short, and you jumped as the door closed behind you.

You looked up at see Matthew staring at you, a soft smile on his face. “Hey.”

“I’m going to class,” you muttered, turning to exit the room. But Matthew put his hand on the door knob to stop you.

“Wait, wait,” he pleaded. “Um, do I see you at the party —“

“Yep,” you nodded, not making eye contact with him. 

“So...then, you saw me at the party with—“

“Yep.”

“Okay...[y/n]...”

“I really have to go to class, so, thanks for the detour, but I’m leaving now.” You removed his hand from the knob and left the closet, not looking back. 

You walked into your classroom, swallowing to get rid of the weird feeling in your throat. You set your bag down and took a seat. You attempted to shake Matthew out of your mind, the smell of him, the sight of him, the tension of being so close to him. But it was hard. It may have been the hardest thing ever. 

“Well, well, well,” a voice called to you. “Guess I got lucky, huh?”

You looked up to see Alex, giving you a toothy grin and a look of pure joy. “Alex,” you breathed. “Hi. This is awesome, you’re in here?”

“Yeah,” he took a seat beside you. “Haven’t seen you much since freshman year. This is nice.”

“It sure is.”

So. 

Remember number eight on your list of atrocities against Matthew Gubler? 

Fucked his friend. While said friend was supposed to help Matthew with his project. 

Alex would be the friend. He was gorgeous and kind and so good in bed. You first met in a cinematography class freshman year, where he very boldly asked if you wanted to hang out some time. You smiled, said yes, and that led to the aforementioned sexual encounter. It only happened a handful of times, until the semester was over. Then you didn’t see each other as often.

But he was here now. He was here and he was flirting with you. You were flirting back. You were hurt and upset and confused and so fucking horny, you could burst. So, after classes, you reached out to him and asked if he could help you with a pre class assignment. He told you to come over. You did. 

You didn’t work on the assignment though. 

Starting off pretty hot and heavy, it was a few weeks of meaningless sex until he asked you out. Claire cheered when she heard the news, causing you to give her a confused look. “Why are you so happy that I have a date?” You giggled. 

“Oh...I just — Alex is cute! He’s great, I always wondered what happened to him. You said he was good in the sack and he was always sweet to you. I’m just, so glad you’re happy.”

You gave her a faux smile, “Yeah. I’m happy.” 

Alex’s friend was having a birthday party at his apartment, and Alex insisted you come. Said it was the only way he’d be able to have any fun when everyone got too drunk. You agreed, and when he picked you up that night, you were dressed in a purple romper and diamond earrings. 

“You look beautiful,” he whispered, leaning in to kiss you. 

“Thank you,” you smiled. “You look beautiful, too.” 

He held your hand as he drove to the apartment, as you got out the car, walked up the stairs, entered the living space. He introduced you to everyone you met, his arm around you proudly and your head nuzzled into his chest. 

Watching you across the room was a very irritated Matthew Gubler, who sat with Veronica on his lap and a beer in his hand. You didn’t notice Matthew’s presence for a long time, considering the fact that he was avoiding you, and you were more focused on Alex. 

While talking to Alex’s friends, you excused yourself to go to the bathroom. You strolled down the hallway, searching for the restroom. 

“[y/n]!”

You turned around, confused. Matthew marched up to you, his hands in his pocket, his face determined. 

“I have to go to the bathroom,” you told him, and continued to walk. 

He followed you. “So, you dating Alex now?”

“That’s not really your business, now is it?”

He grabbed onto your arm and pulled your body into his, hiding you two behind a corner. “No, but it bugs me.”

“It bugs you?”

“It bugs me. I don’t want you with Alex. Alex is a dick.” 

“Well, not to me—“

Matthew leaned down and kissed you, his hands tightened on your waist. He kissed you like he was starving, mouth open, breath heavy. 

You pushed him away, your eyes closed in shock and ecstasy. No, no, you thought. “Matthew—“

“Let’s leave,” he interjected.

“Huh?”

“Let’s leave. Me and you. Let’s go.”

“No,” you snapped.

“Why not?”

“Because, I’m here with Alex! And you’re here with...her, so, no. I’m staying here, with the guy I came with.”

“C’mon—“

“Matthew, no! No! Are you deaf? Are you dumb? Leave me alone, and go back to your girlfriend.” You suddenly didn’t have to pee anymore, so you returned to Alex and his group of friends. Matthew watched as you took a seat in Alex’s lap, and you pretended not to notice. 

There was radio silence for months. Matthew even removed you on snapchat, and for your sanity, you ignored it. You continued a casual relationship with Alex, and he continued to worship the ground you walked on. A vast change in pace from Matthew. Claire pushed for the Alex relationship hardcore, saying hi to him when came over, giving you guys time alone, tagging alone with you two to parties. 

But every once in a while, you thought about Matthew. When you saw a particular movie, or heard one of his favorite bands, right after you would have sex. And especially on Halloween. Over the summer, he told you all about his costume plans, party plans, and movie marathons he was going to have. And for some reason, like a clown, you just assumed you’d be with him when it happened.

By the time final exams were over, you and Alex considered yourselves exclusive. You strolled into the end of the year party, holding hands and laughing. You’d fallen into a good groove with his friends. They all liked you, you liked them, and you enjoyed their company. While sitting with them, one pulled out a joint, lit it and began to pass it around.

“Want a hit?” Alex asked.

“She’s pretty tiny. Can she handle it?” A friend said. 

You glared at her and took the paper between your lips, inhaling and holding a large amount of smoke. She watched in amazement as you exhaled through your nose, “Well...I stand corrected, princess.”

You took in a sharp breath of air.

And that was just the beginning of the spiral. 

You stayed in rotation of the weed for a long time, until your thoughts were nothing but a mess of words racing everywhere. Your eyes felt heavy, so did your body. And you couldn’t stop thinking about him.

You were wondering was there ever really a connection or were you just highly sexually compatible? Did Matthew ever have feelings for you or did he just want one thing? Why does kissing him and fucking him and just talking to him feel so different? How come when everything falls apart, you want Matthew? How come when everything is going well, you want Matthew? Need to talk to Matthew. Where’s Matthew? Where’s Matthew? 

“[y/n]!” Alex called. “You’re high as fuck,” he laughed. “What are you thinking about?”

Matthew. 

“Come here,” and he pulled you into a kiss. And when you pulled away, feeling nothing, nothing at all, you realized you needed Matthew. You needed to feel something. But Matthew wasn’t here. And you wish he was here. Where’s Matthew? 

Tears were springing to your eyes, but you quickly began to cough, distracting yourself with a new sensation. You rose to your feet, and exited the room, much to Alex’s disapproval. He watched you rush past him, his face laced with confusion.

Everyone you passed by looked like Matthew. Why did everyone look like Matthew? You missed Matthew. And this was unfair. You wiped at the tears in your eyes, but they were already gliding down your cheeks. They burned your skin and it made you cry more. You were blinded. And way too high to notice Matthew - the real Matthew - entering the hallway. 

His eyes were redder than red, a lot like yours. His movements were slow. But something told him to reach out for you. Like a magnet. And you fell into his arms. It took him a whole second to realize it was you, but he did. 

“[y/n]?” he whispered. “Oh, my God, [y/n]. What’s wrong? What happened?” His hands moved to cup your face, his thumbs wiping the tears on your cheek. 

“[y/n]!” Oh, no. Alex. “What are you doing? Where are you going?” 

At that point, you looked up at Matthew. Focused in on him. Said his name. But his attention had turned to Alex. And he was pissed. You could tell. 

“Wait, wait, Matthew, wait,” you pleaded. 

“What the hell did you do to her?” He shouted, holding you close. 

“Wait, Matthew, he didn’t—“

“Gube, let her go, dude!.” Alex snapped, reaching for your arm. 

And that sent Matthew through the roof. He released you from his arms and moved towards Alex, delivering a swift punch to his face. You’d never seen Matthew so much as cuss someone out, so this. This. This was hard to register. Nonetheless, you screamed his name, attempting to push both of them away from the brawl. But it was useless. 

Two guys had to step in and separate Alex and Matthew, pulling them to opposing sides of the hallway. And you had to decide who to follow. It wasn’t a hard decision to make. 

You kept a good 100 feet behind Matthew the whole time, watching him stomp his way to his residence hall. You knew exactly how to get into the building, but weren’t sure you should. You’d never seen him so angry. So red. So primal. 

But, Matthew. 

Oh, God, Matthew. What would you say? What would you do? Did he want to see you? Did he want to be alone? Was his roommate there? You paced for 20 minutes, freezing your ass off outside the dormitory. Your mind was made up when you found the side entrance and let yourself in, marching up the steps. Now or never. Now or never. And you needed to see Matthew now. 

You perched yourself in front of his door, paused, and proceeded to knock with full force. “Be home, be home, be home,” you whispered. 

He was home.

He came to the door, shirtless, his face bruised, his hair tasseled, and that stupid, ridiculous gold chain around his neck. And you’d never wanted to suck a dick so badly in your entire life. You instantly imagined grabbing him, kissing him, pulling him close. But you didn’t do that. You stood there, looking like an idiot, until he spoke. 

“What are you doing here, [y/n]?”

You hadn’t even thought about it. It just felt right to follow him. “I—I wanted...I wanted to make sure you were alright.”

He shrugged, “I’m alright.” His face was stern. Stoic. No emotion showed on his features and it made you sick.

“Oh,” you said. “Okay.” 

You stared at each other for a long time. You just wanted him to say it. Ask you to stay. Ask you to come in. To admit it. But he wouldn’t. So you had to walk away. 

“Okay,” you nodded, sadly, and ducked your head as you headed towards the exit. “Okay.” You sniffled, patting at your eyes as they watered. 

Matthew watched you go. His bottom lip caught between his teeth, his shoulders relaxing as he exhaled. “[y/n],” he called. 

You’d stopped in your tracks.

“You...you were pretty stoned at the party,” he told you. “Are you sober?” 

You turned your body to face him. You thought about his eyes. How red they were. How slow he moved. How you had both been utterly and totally high as hell. “I’m sober,” you said. Honestly. After all of tonight’s events, and the sheer shock of seeing Matthew, being so close to him again, you had sobered up. “Believe me, I’m sober. Are you?”

Matthew licked him lips, nodding as he sighed. He stepped out into the hallway, and pushed the door to his dorm open. He signaled for you to enter. 

You gave him a quick and sad smile, and you avoided eye contact with him as you stepped into the empty room. He led the way to his private room, and let you in, closing the door behind you. You kept your back to him, arms crossed over your chest. 

He sighed, “I’m—Veronica and I broke up. Actually, she broke up with me...again. So, y’know, it wasn’t much of a surprise, but—“

“Matthew,” you cut him off, turning to him. “I need a favor.”

He hesitated, then his voice was strong, “Anything.”

“I leave for home next week for Christmas break. And since, I can’t seem to figure out what the hell about you is driving me insane, Matthew Gubler, I’m going to need time. Space. If you need time and space. So, you need to make that decision.”

“Okay.”

“But right now, take your clothes off,” you ordered. 

“Okay.”

He stared at you lustfully, just like you wanted, his body moving on autopilot to remove his shorts and boxers. You mirrored his movements, and took off your dress, subsequently tossing your bra and panties onto the floor. He grabbed onto your body and kissed you, one hand tangled in your hair and the other gripping your waist. He pushed you back onto his bed, falling on top of you and kissing your neck. You held onto his torso as he made way to your collarbone, nibbling on it lightly. He pulled away and gropped your breasts, massaging them with his fingers. 

He was practically drooling over them, his eyes focused solely on your boobs. He leaned down and sucked on your nipple, while his hand slid down between your legs. He felt around your core, and slowly slid two fingers into you. You threw your head back, and moaned. 

Matthew kissed a trail from your breast to your hips. He began to kiss your inner thighs, kneeling down in front of you and pulling you up to his face. He pressed his tongue against  your clit, working his muscle in an up and down motion. You moved your hips against his face and his fingers, gasping weakly. You forgot how good his mouth felt, but this was huge, huge reminder. You gripped onto his hair and swore under your breath. 

He noticed your thighs tightening around his face, and increased his intensity and speed. Your back arched off of the mattress, you whimpered into your mouth, and your chest was heaving. You let out a long groan as you came on his face, your entire body tensing up. He withdrew his fingers from you, and licked up from your core to your navel to your breasts. He kissed your neck, then your lips. And he sucked his fingers clean, holding eye contact with you.

Overwhelmed, you pulled him in by his face and kissed him passionately. He grunted against your lips, rubbing his cock on your core. He pushed into you, his jaw dropping and his forehead against yours. You wrapped your legs around his waist and this encouraged him to thrust into you. Matthew held you in his arms, moaning into your ear as he moved his hips. 

You kissed his jaw, sucking on the skin until you felt it pulse between your lips. You could feel his muscles moving under your palms, and his cock striking a sensitive spot inside of you. It felt like you were crumbling, getting weaker by the second. But when you felt the chain hitting your chin, you wired back to life. You gripped onto the necklace and twisted it around your fingers, angrily biting your lip. 

As he slammed into you, you muttered a soft “fuck!” and yanked on the chain. It popped off of his neck, and it was cathartic. You moaned and threw it to a far corner of the room. You reached down and rubbed your clit quickly, panting as Matthew’s body began to tremble. He kept his gaze focused on you as you let him fuck you into another orgasm, and your hips rolled against his in an eager rhythm. 

“Oh, fuck!” Matthew exclaimed, pulling out of you just in time. He released himself onto your stomach, moaning and gasping for air. 

The mattress creaked as he laid down beside you, collapsing with a thud. The two of you stared at the ceiling, naked and breathy and covered in sweat. You rested your hand on Matthew’s chest, and he intertwined your fingers. 

The next week, you were headed to the train station to get home for Christmas. Not knowing what to say to each, Matthew and you hadn’t talked since last week. You sat in the back of an uber, your suitcase at your side, when your phone vibrated in your lap. You picked it up and recognized Matthew’s name flashing on your screen. 

You sighed, swiped to answer, and held the phone to your ear, “Hello?”

“I don’t want space.”

“I—“ You stuttered. 

“I want as little space as possible.”

You were stunned, quiet, “Okay.”

The line went dead, and you set your phone down. You bit down on your lip. But the smile was still clear.

[PART 5.]

[mallowstep]

Thanks for the reply! I think I know what you're talking about with the factual errors. I'm reading it myself currently and made sure it was latest version (It's on so many websites!) It was a reddit post and someone else pointed out that Sorreltail's kits were apprenticed too early. Yet when I'm reading the file, that seems to have updated. It's Daisy's kits becoming apprentices now.

putting this up top bc it’s important - just to make sure we’re talking abt the same fic, i’m referring to “leafpool’s wish rewritten” by mellowix. i only brought this up because you mentioned reddit and i couldn’t find it there, which could just be that reddit search sucks, or we’re talking about two different fics.

hmm i’m rereading right now so i can write a proper review and i didn’t even notice that XD this is why i take notes when i want to do review/analysis

i can’t really blame mellowix for that kind of stuff though, lord knows i’m just as guilt and warriors does not make it easy to be good about that kind of thing. the one thing that got to me while reading that i kind of had to go “okay matthew avert your eyes” over was the honey/preserving prey thing. uh, an inspired idea, and it’s one of those things where it’s not just that it’s wrong, it’s how close it is to being right, that gets to me

but that has to do with an intersection of a lot of really small facts that all kind of combine to create a hole. but, like, it’s not a fundamental error, esp. because the cats in leafpool’s wish rewritten are much more anthro. like, when i do a rewrite, i’m usually leaning hard into how-real-cats-work, because (a) i like that and (b) i find it easier to smooth over story errors that way.

*story errors distinct from plot hole in that they’re explained in canon, that explanation just sucks/doesn’t make sense/etc

but anyway, when i write medicine cats, i try to focus on their spiritual side? over the healing. because ehhhh cats + herbs + healing = a lot of headaches for me. it doesn’t help that i’m pagan and have my own herbs correspondences for healing. they’re pretty similar (which is bad enough because cat and human biology isn’t the same), but then something like juniper is used to calm and i’m like “??? sure use a fire element herb to calm people down why don’t you”

anyway, all of this is to say, i avoid dealing with the questionable properties of medicine cats by not writing about it when i can. so i’m willing to overlook things like successfully tying a knot in a leaf wrap. that’s fine, it’s fine, not overthinking it.

but preserving prey in honey is...well the short answer is, the bacteria in cats’ mouths just won’t let that happen, and you would need to drown prey in honey to have any chance to begin with. the thing about honey is that it’s water supersaturated with sugar, so if you fail in using it correctly, you’ve just fed bacteria a shit ton of sugar.

that said, like, the time frame is fairly small and it’s cold and it’s not really derailing anything by existing, so i don’t care all that much. it’s just a minor thing. i certainly don’t have a better solution, that’s why the closest i got in my equivalent LPW rewrite was to kind of shrug and be like “everyone knows and no one talks about it okay??”

anyway yeah! i don’t actually have that much negative to say about it just a few tiny nitpicks. i’ll do a full review of it i swear because there’s a lot of really good stuff tucked away that i want to highlight.

[downwithwritersblock]

Happy Halloween! In honor of this wonderfully spooky month, my amazing and brilliant partner in crime @quills-and-golden-ink and I have decided to bring back the Monthly guide to monsters, so in addition to the monthly prompt sets, somewhere during the month there will be one of these guides to a mythological creature.  

Since I am a huge fan of demonology (which has little to do with my friends joking that I am one) and since demon/angel aus have been really popular in fandoms lately (*cough*thanks good omens *cough*), we decided to start this out with just that! 

***Please remember that these guides are just for fun! If for whatever reason something about one of our guides bugs you, please message me in my inbox before going off on a rant without full information, context and views.  These are meant to help inspire people in their writing pursuits and offer creativity, nothing more***

Enjoy! Have fun! and feel free to tag me in anything this might inspire! 

Demons

Definition: A supernatural malevolent being that is commonly found throughout different mythologies and history. The original greek origin word ‘Daimon’ does not actually have a necessarily hostile meaning. ‘Daimon’ denotes a spirit of great of divine power, and most likely finds its routes in the Greek verb for to divide or distribute. Demons are most commonly known as evil spirits of the underworld. In many religions/mythologies, Demons are thought to be angels that have fallen or have been banned for heaven due to their own sins. 

Demons can be summoned by a person or a horrific event but there is not always reason to why a demon haunts a specific location. Demons can also follow people from one location to another. 

Description: The descriptions of demons vary from culture to culture. Some have physical forms, some are only spirits that mortal humans can not see. Those that do have physical forms tend to be animal-like or ‘monstrous’ in order to further enforce fear. There’s also the common idea that demons can inhabit human bodies and blend in naturally or potentially give themselves away with ‘demonic’ traits like unusual eyes, horns, serpent tongues, sharp teeth or claws or other subtle/ minute ‘devilish’ traits. It’s also commonly thought that some demons have separate forms, one more human and one animal. 

Abilities: The abilities of demons also varies depending on the specific demon, but the most common belief is that demons can influence or possess humans in order to corrupt (and often collect) their soul. Demons, like ghosts, are said to feed off the energy of the living world around them. The more negative their environment the stronger they can get. In many cultures, Demons are what brings out humanity's worst traits like jealousy, envy, pride and wrath, and are bringers of things like disease, famine, and war. 

Signs of a Demonic Haunting: 

-Strange unexplained odors that come and go. Usually a scent of something rotting or dead. 

-odd, unexplained noises are usually the first sign of a demonic haunting. These noises often include whispers, scratches, footsteps, growling, thumping or knocking sounds. Particularly the sound of three consecutive knocking sounds, which is said to be the demonic spirit mocking the holy trinity. 

-Animals are said to be able to pick up on paranormal activity that humans can not. So an animal that is suddenly acting very strange or scared with no logical reason, it could be a sign of a haunting. 

-It has been said that Demons can communicate with people through dreams, or more accurately through their nightmares. 

-Unexplained, random surges of negative emotions. Demons are beings that feed off of negative emotions, so they often try to create or enhance whatever negativity they can find 

-Physical marks on the body. Many people who claim to have experienced demonic hauntings report finding red marks like scratches and burns or bruises on their body. 

-Sightings of ‘shadow people’ or human-like figure made of darkness are also common in demonic hauntings

-Demonic activity is most active at night, and supposedly between heightened between the hours of 3 and 4 am. 

How to stop a demon: 

-Bibles: Demons in western culture are said to be repelled by holy symbols from Christianity. The bible thought to be word of the Lord himself can repel demons. 

-Crucifixes: The cross is a holy symbol of Jesus Christ, and is also thought to repel evil. 

-Holy Water: Water blessed by a priest in the name of God can repel and potentially harm the western demon

-Rosaries: Rosary beads are an object(often necklaces) used to help mediation and prayer, it’s thought to bring you closer to God as you pray, which could potentially protect one from evil. 

-Cleansing: Many different cultures have different ways of ‘cleansing’ a home or person of evil. Smudging: The act of burning special herbs(usually sage) to cleanse is a sacred practice among many Native American tribes.  Many other cultures have similar practices. Frankincense, Myrrh, Amber and Dragons blood incense are also commonly used for cleansing. 

-Exorcisms: Most religions and cultures have some type of Exorcism, in which a spiritual leader of some kind goes through a sacred and divine ritual in order to purge something of evil. The most common examples are the exorcism practices of catholic priests. 

Demons in media: 

-Supernatrual(T.V show, 2005)

-Lucifer(T.V show 2016)

-The Mortal Instruments/ ShadowHunters (Book series/T.V show 2016)

-Wynonna Earp(T.V show 2016)

-The Conjuring(Movie 2013)

-Insidious(2010)

-The Exorcist(1973)

-Constantine(T.V 2015)

-Penny Dreadful(T.V show 2014)

-Good Omens(Book, T.V show 2019)

The list of demons in media is a very long one(especially in the realm of movies) so this is a very simplified list. For more check out last years ghost post!

Prompts: 

1. “You’re uh… You are not at all what I expected a demon to look like…”

2. “For the last time! I did not summon you! Go bug someone else!”

3.“That seems a bit excessive, even for a demon.” 

4.“Don’t you ever, ever trust a demon. Not even me.” 

5. “Getting rid of a demon isn't that easy, all you’ve done is make it mad”

6. “I am supposed to be a demon, but I no longer know what that means.”

[thecandywrites]

The Pink Panther

So this story is again, inspired from a crazy dream I had and again, like a woman possessed I JUST HAD TO WRITE IT. all my other wips and commissions be damned and just staring at my compulsary working on this going ‘uh, excuse me? Hello? You didn’t forget about us right? Right?!” and me going ‘but crazy idea that will drive me mad if I don’t get out of my head!’ in the same tone Hulk said ‘big monster!’ to Thor when Thor told him not to smash. And it’s a break from...well, everything I usually write. You see this is what you get when you watch count of Monte Cristo AND The Pink Panther from the 60′s. THAT PINK PANTHER and all those period dramas *cough* Harlots on Hulu *cough*. You get a nightmare fart of a story from three things that probably shouldn’t ever be crossed over. So I just need this out of my system so I can FOCUS on the other things and it was a really fun dream. Dashing lords in disguise, huge gems, a foul plot afoot and the promise of fortune greater than your wildest dreams. It’s fine it’s fine. 

Vidame Emilia Bellim sat in the back of her carriage with her best friend who just happened to also be her childhood friend and chaperon Fredrick as they rode to a strange palace in a remote area of Europe. Emily’s title and prestige meant that Emily was respected and sought after by nobles all over Europe, thinking that there was a great fortune behind her to be won when Emily’s adopted grandmother who was in poor health would pass and Emily had just gotten done being hosted by such a noble for such a purpose. While Fredrick on the other hand, his father was a scientist. One of the best but was eccentric, becoming at risk of being enemies of the state with his rantings. And while there was no romance between them, they were closer than siblings and the best of friends with Fredrick and his father living with Emily and her grandmother at Emily’s estate and Fredrick acting as her chaperon to make sure the nobles behaved themselves and only acted in the most gentlemanly like ways towards her and that Emily and her reputation would be protected at all times and that she would stay well above reproach.  

“So where exactly are we going?” Freddy asked after a while of traveling on the well traveled road.  

“To Count Sparta’s estate, his eldest son has been deemed eligible for marriage now and I am one of the few deemed worthy of being considered a prospect for him, apparently.” Emily answered sarcastically before Freddy snorted a laugh as his smile grew fond.

“My grandmother got a letter from Count Sparta himself and she promptly sent the carriage and another letter with it and sent me to go to this place. The first letter makes no sense, I’ve read it repeatedly and nothing makes sense. It’s like one of her many riddles.” Emily groused as she handed the letters over to Freddy to look over in the light of the lantern in the carriage next to him. Freddy frowned as he read them and tried to make sense of them too. He read them over twice and even to him it didn’t make a bit of sense. So he simply handed them back with a shrug before looking back out over the darkening landscape. When they stopped at an inn, they simply took a single room as Freddy helped Emily undress before the two crawled in bed together and cuddled close.

“I will always prefer to sleep with you more than anyone else.” Emily sighed contentedly with her head resting over his chest.

“Only because you know I’ll never grope you or worse.” Freddy teased.

“Precisely.” Emily smiled before she rolled over so that he spooned her and wrapped his arms around her waist before the two promptly fell asleep. After a long three days of travel on the road and staying at another inn only a few short hours away from Count Sparta’s estate the day before the letter demanded they arrive, they rested for the night, in the morning, Freddy helped Emily get ready into a new gown her grandmother sent her and helped her with her hair and makeup. Freddy always could make her look ravishing so that every other man seemed to fall in love with her with just a look at her and in return Emily got Freddy ready, making him look dashingly handsome. Her grandmother sent Freddy some new clothes as well so that he looked like a proper dandy and the two looked like a pair in matching peacock teal which did wonders for Emily’s fair complexion and natural dark red hair, something of a novelty all the nobles sought after but it was something she didn’t let get to her head so to speak, if anything it only empowered her to resist their advances and to be as picky as she wished about who she would keep company with and had rules about her person that most ladies in her status and circumstance could only dream of demanding but it was because of who was backing her that no one dared question it. Her adopted grandmother was a  grand duchess and was related to the royal families, some kind of great aunt who’s power and influence was great and whose fortune was famed to be unusually large and supposedly independent than that of the royal family and their monarchies, she had a fierce reputation for being a perfectionist in not just her home or her clothing but of others and had had no natural children of her own. And how Emilia got to be her grand daughter was something of a mystery but never questioned and that once the grand duchess named Emilia her only rightful heir, it was simply accepted as much and her adopted grandmother groomed Emilia to be practically perfect and poured all of her resources into Emilia’s education and talents to make Emilia the ideal in all things. Frustrating for a small child but as Emilia got older, she realized the value in such hard work since it now garnered her something priceless, respect wherever she went.

When they arrived at the sprawling and luxurious estate, their host did not greet them, instead the steward and his assistants did and Emily greeted them in graciousness and with the utmost respect in turn and soon realized she was in the company of some of the more keen minds but with checkered pasts and wild reputations of Europe’s elite and she felt right at home in such company for some reason and soon Freddy left her side as the two quickly gathered as much information from the other guests as they could as to why they were there. All of the other guests had gotten similar, perplexing letters as they soon began sharing them, Freddy and Emily quickly and easily memorizing the other’s letters as they gathered that the other guests were there for the same objective but varied incentives and motivations, a few felt they were being blackmailed to come here since their daughters were part of the pool of approved nobility that most royal princes would use to pick out a future queen out of. Others thought it was intrigue while most just thought it was harmless fun and a game as everyone was with a daughter of marrying age and knew that the estate had two sons of marrying age and all the letters mentioned the eldest and his quest to find a bride which is why Emily found herself surrounded by over a dozen of the most eligible ladies, dressed in gowns just as grand, if not more so than her own before they were seated for dinner. But again, their host did not join them, instead the steward and his assistants led the meal. Which was beyond delicious and Freddy and Emily happily gorged themselves. Not having had a good, decent meal in the last few days it took for them to get there.

“How do you like the meal Lady Bellim?” Rolf, the steward’s lead attendant inquired of her as he refilled her wine glass for her, having heard that her tastes were on par with royalty when it came to excellence and refinement.  

“Quite excellent, I’m very impressed, the variety of seasonings used is impressive, the techniques are a wonderful blend of the tried and true and new. I have yet to have an off mouthful. The cooks and all those tasked with helping to prepare this feast are to be commended, truly.” Emily praised genuinely as Rolf smiled proudly.

“Do you not think that the pigeon is over-spiced?” Viscountess Lucretia asked as she couldn’t help but cough as her eyes watered and she fanned herself and tried to cleanse her palette with more wine.

“No, not at all, I detect a wide variety of spice, particularly saffron, turmeric, chili pepper, coriander and cumin, is this your first time trying anything with any of those? Most feel the smallest fraction is too much because of how intense they can be, especially chili pepper.” Emily returned from her place across from Lucretia.

“That must be it then, I do not care for it at all.” She made a disgusted face before downing the rest of her wine before another attendant came and refilled her glass.

“You are from the mountain range of Italy are you not? There are herbs that grow in the mountains which are quite fine and should be just as esteemed as the silk road spices. Perhaps you would prefer the meal if it had more of those in it.” Emily pointed out and the Viscountess smiled appreciatively.

“Yes. Very much so, I have heard that you are very well traveled and prefer the silk road spices, no doubt why you were able to distinguish them so easily.” Lucretia returned fondly, appreciating Emily’s respectful esteem and making it so that her beloved herbs were equal to the famed silk road spices which was a compliment she greatly admired and appreciated.

“I appreciate all spices, no matter their origin, as long as they are used well.” Emily grinned as she continued to eat and thoroughly enjoyed the meal, trying some of every dish.  

“Now where does the title Vidame come from or mean? I don’t believe I’ve ever heard of it before.” Lucretia asked Emily curiously who smiled appreciatively as she wiped her mouth and cleared her mouth so that she could speak clearly.

“It is a title awarded by His Holiness the Pope himself, it was given to my father for commanding the Pope’s army and Bishop’s forces- not just in the Vatican but all over the Holy Empire. I inherited the title when my father passed since I am the only child of my parents and while I’m not expected to perform my late father’s duties, I enjoy the doting from His Holiness as perhaps any beloved grandchild would from a grandfather. In fact this cross is a gift from him for my birthday a few years back since my birthday falls in the Holy Week. I spend every birthday with His Holiness at the Vatican.” Emily boasted as she gestured to the outrageously gaudy cross that was encrusted with jewels that weighed heavily on her chest as all the other families gasped softly as they realized they should have risked breaking the rules and brought their sons to try to woo her too even though it was expressed that only chaperons, guardians and fathers be allowed to come to keep Lord Sparta from having to compete for any lady’s attention. But to have the Pope’s blessing was invaluable, no wonder she could go wherever she wished in the Holy Empire and beyond without a problem or could demand that no one touch her or invade her personal space because she had the pope’s backing and protection. They had all heard how the last poor soul who tried not only got stripped of all his lands and holdings by the king as demanded by the Pope, but excommunicated and promptly killed himself for the shame he brought on himself. So to be Vidame by the pope and future Grand Duchess when her grandmother would pass, would be a double honor to add to any family tree.

After the meal the guests were invited to roam the estate for one hour as they pleased without hindrance because all the staff from the estate would gather in the dining room for that hour and Freddy and Emily combed over every bit of it they could, Freddy going to the upper floors while Emily searched the lower ones, trying to find the basement and found a tunnel, shut by a metal door and once she used the key her grandmother sent her- she opened it and wandered inside before it suddenly flashed flame and she dove to the ground as a flame lit up the roof of the cave but only for a brief moment, barely a second or two. When the flame was gone, she stood up and wiped the dirt off her gown and noticed that the walls and ceiling were covered in black soot and that the ground had become like soft but charred saw dust, with dead beetle corpses blowing in an unearthly breeze within the tunnel. Her letter from her grandmother had said ‘go where death is certain to achieve the best life’ and now that sentiment suddenly made sense. Count Sparta was rumored to have unlimited funds, from family lines from all over Europe that even the kings of such lands drooled over and that if any king dare oppose the Spartas, that they would simply move to a new sprawling estate in another country, bringing their wealth with them and leaving the monarchs of said country financially devastated because of a lack of tax revenue that the Spartas would pay and that in return for Sparta’s patronage, the Spartas were granted not just lands but titles galore in every country they took up residence in. But only the father was known to only the royal families and rarely socialized outside of the King’s private court where he was considered a royal adviser- so his face was relatively unknown. His sons were even bigger mysteries, the only people to talk about them were the scholars who came from all over Europe to educate them for a small time until they passed all pertinent knowledge over then they sent away with more wealth than they could hope to use in a lifetime. Perhaps all that wealth was hidden down here. She knew her hour was coming to an end and knew that at the end of the hour, wherever the guests would be, they would be locked there for the night, their own rooms being the only “safe” spaces there were. She quickly gathered her skirts and made a run for her room that she would be sharing with Freddy, passing all the other guests who were leisurely going to their own rooms. Not thinking there was much of any haste to it and not taking their warnings in their letters seriously at all. When she got there and saw that Freddy was on the other end of the hall, also quickly going to their room and carrying something heavy wrapped in his coat.

“Freddy! Run!” She yelled down the hall before Freddy quickly slipped out of his heeled shoes and ran for her as she pulled him into the room right in the nick of time and once inside the doors shut and locked on their own and there were so many other guests left out into the hallway who were angry and demanded that they should gain entry to their rooms for the night before they went looking for other rooms that had beds to get some sleep.

“What happened to you?” Freddy asked as he noticed Emily was covered in soot, the black staining the gorgeous peacock teal of her silk and satin dress.

“I went where death was certain.” Emily explained with a bright smile.

“What?” Freddy asked as he helped her out of her dress and helped her clean up, miraculously with only a dab of a damp cloth, the soot came out of it and didn’t actually stain the dress because it was dry dust at that point.

“Under the manor, where a basement should be, I found a cave, I believe it must have been a bat cave, but fire soon lit up the cave and I had to fall to the ground to keep the flames from eating me. The floor is covered in what feels like charred sawdust. But I think it is charred sawdust on top of guano. There were beetle and cockroach carcasses swirling in an unearthly wind. What did you find?” Emily asked.

“A telescope that rivals any and all that I had ever seen before. I could see the moon and Mars from it. There was also this,” Freddy answered as he pulled what he thought was a giant pink crystal from his coat that he had used to wrap around it and what had made his run difficult.

“Wow, it is obviously a very pink gemstone, a diamond perhaps, and it looks like there is a panther in it. You must have taken a rare gem indeed.” Emily realized when she took the large gem that was the size of a pomelo and had to be held with both hands as she looked it over, it was raw and uncut and gorgeous.

“Oh, oops.” Freddy grimaced.

“Do no worry my friend, we can return it tomorrow. But something is afoot tonight, we must try to figure it out.” Emily realized as she went over to the desk and put the gem down and took out not only her letter but everyone else’s letter that she happened to steal from them.

“I see your fingers are just as sticky as mine.” Freddy teased as he came over which got Emily to grin at him again before they both sat down and compared all the letters. An hour later, a chorus of screams was heard and Emily and Freddy looked at each other worriedly before it just pushed them to work harder but then a deathly quiet followed. Emily and Freddy began looking around the room for anything that could help them but found nothing of the sort before Freddy noticed the letters were numbered peculiarly.

“Fibonacci.” Freddy breathed before he looked at the letters and found that the letters were numbered in the upper right hand corner and arranged them in the Fibonacci sequence before they read them again in that order, this time, they began to make a little bit of sense, it was a set of warnings of how to survive their stay in the house. But they were missing several pages still.

“We are pawns in a game.” Emily realized as she grinned wider.

“You smile as if you are enjoying this.” Freddy teased.

“Who said I wasn’t?” Emily returned.“Come, lets get some sleep, we can’t think clearly if we haven’t slept.” Emily offered as they got ready for bed. In the morning, Emily acted as if nothing the least bit disturbing had happened the night before and was delighted when she checked the doors to see them unlocked. When she and Freddy went into the hall, most of the other guests were already running for their lives and leaving the place, screaming at the attendants and servants to make sure they got all their things so that they could leave this cursed place as soon as possible; a few of them begging Emily to leave too, saying that the house was haunted and that they were there to meet their deaths and to write to the Pope to tell him about it although all their accounts about the ghosts seemed strange to Emily.  

“Do you not wish to go also Lady Bellim?” Rolf asked her curiously as he and his men were done carrying things down for the other guests so they could leave, although he personally didn’t wish for her to go. He liked her the best, since she was kind, gracious and respectful whereas everyone else seemed to be haughty and rude.

“I have played many games with many lords Sir Rolf, this is yet another one. Besides, I feel there is a prize equal to the task that perhaps hasn’t been mentioned in the letters. I’m staying.” Emily firmly insisted. “Fredrick Dear, you are free to go if you wish, please don’t stay solely for my benefit.” Emily offered but Freddy was just as intrigued as she was.

“I believe I will be with you until the end, whatever that may be Emilia Darling.” Freddy returned before he sat down at the table to get some breakfast.

“If I may be so bold and if you’ll forgive my saying so,” Rolf began and paused to see her reaction, she raised a curious brow but her facial expression was of ease, inviting and curious which only emboldened him to finish his statement. “You two make quite the pair.” Rolf noted as Emily stayed right where she was next to Rolf feeling she was safer with Rolf than she was with any of the other guests. Like she could be at ease with him without being offensive or improper, like she could be friends with him. He had such a warm and inviting manner to his person and he was unusually handsome to her and he had a gentle charm about him too which she found quite attractive.  

“We are no pair at all, simply the best of friends who’ve known each other since childhood, we are closer than siblings and are like family but never more.” Emily whispered to Rolf as she spread her fan to cover her face and conceal her conversation with him but still offered him a friendly if not playful and fond smile which Rolf found enchanting. Most ladies plastered on fake or polite smiles, hers was different. It was genuine because even her eyes seemed to glitter and glow with delight. Rolf could understand why half of Europe was infatuated with her. Emily was lovely.  

“Oh?” Rolf asked curiously, hoping to keep her company for as long as he could.  

“My Dear Fredrick prefers the company of other men.” Emily whispered.

“I see,” Rolf nodded in understanding, his brother Fits would be delighted to learn that.

“So you can understand, as a lady who is constantly trying to get courted, how refreshing his company is and how much I can trust his companionship.” Emily added and Rolf could only nod in understanding and offer her a smile, he supposed if he were in her shoes, he would be the same way. “So if you’ll forgive my curiosity, how long have you been in service to his Lordship?” Emily asked since he seemed more talkative than most servants would be which she actually liked and enjoyed. Knowing that servants were people too and she usually received better service from them if she was kind and respectful to them and treated them with respect and dignity, that and it made her feel better as a person to be polite to them. Not thinking so highly of herself that she would look down on anyone else, especially servants.

“Since I was a boy.” Rolf answered.

“How often does his Lordship like to play such games?” Emily inquired.

“More often than not.” Rolf answered and Emily nodded in understanding.

“Thank you for your candor Sir Rolf, I greatly appreciate it.” Emily graciously thanked him.

“Thank you for yours Lady Bellim.” Rolf answered in kind and Emily couldn’t help but smile and felt a kinship to him and sat down to breakfast herself as Rolf watched her appreciatively. Most of the other people there talked down to him because they perceived him to be a servant when in reality, his father was Count Sparta and Lord of the house and pretending to be the Steward and he himself was Lord Sparta, parading around as his assistant to weed out the undeserving of their guests. Rolf had expressed an interest in getting married and his father’s way of dealing with that was to have this charade, wanting only the most brave and clever girl to be his son’s wife and so far only Emily and a few other girls and their families remained, those ones however were the more despicable families in his opinion. He strode over to his brother to whisper Emily’s revelation to him, knowing his own brother also preferred the company of other men too, his brother absolutely delighted to hear the news and immediately traded places with one of the servants so that he could attend to Freddy himself.  

After breakfast they were invited to tour the gardens, which they did. Emily and Freddy however easily crept out of them and really tried to survey the grounds and when they got to the other side of the house, they found bare wilderness, black smoke billowed out of some craggy rocks every so often near a cliff and at the cliff, there was a waterfall, the waters coming out from deep underneath the manor. Rolf watched from a distance, having panicked that he lost her on the grounds and went looking for her and breathed in relief when he found her but couldn’t help but appreciate Emily’s tenacity and bravery for exploring where she was, even laying on the ground to try to look over the cliff safely. Also appreciating the fact that she was more than a pretty face. She had a kindness and a humility to her nature that he found very appealing. He had heard many rumors about her, how she was as uncommonly pretty as she was clever, discerning and brilliant, too brilliant for a woman. Headstrong and lively too. Which to him were exactly what he was looking for. He wanted a wife to excite his mind as much as his body while warming his heart, he also heard rumors she was skittish, rebellious and refused to be coerced into anything she didn’t want to do and so far she had lived up to her reputation.  He was looking forward to seeing how she would react to the next test.

At lunch his father got his own steward and his own steward’s sons to pose as himself and his sons, riding gallantly up the drive and making a grand entrance and apologizing that they had urgent business with the king that they needed to take care of at the last minute, Rolf and Fits carrying the large chest of gold coins as the ‘payment’ for their services to the king which worked like a charm as the other guests eyed the gold laden chest with the same hunger a starving man would look at a plated meal. Then the real Lords watched how all the other families would react to their replacements and to no one’s surprise, all the daughters were pushed to fawn over the fake heirs. Rolf was keenly delighted however when Emily was not one of them, even though she was amiable and polite, she didn’t throw herself at the acting Lord like the other girls did. Instead she seemed to be keen on observing him but the more she was around him, the more it was obvious to Rolf that she did not like his acting replacement and made no further bids for his time or attention. He watched Emily look out the window after playing a card game with his replacement and had won and cashed out the moment she got all the winnings instead of staying to continue to play as he came to stand next to her since the light in her brilliant aquamarine eyes had died a little and now she looked rather sullen and it pained him to see her so, usually any girl would be over the moon winning as much as she did but instead she was looking more sullen than the losers were- now that her back was to everyone else and no one else cared to see how she was.

“Are you alright Lady Bellim?” Rolf asked as he came to stand with her at the large window.

“Yes, perfectly alright Sir Rolf, many thanks for your concern.” Emily answered, her whole being lighting up and the warmth of her expression returning the moment she noticed him come near her.

“Do you not take delight in his Lordship?” Rolf asked, fearing Emilia had already seen through the ruse.

“Could I be honest with you without causing offense?” Emily asked warily but with hints of hopefulness.

“Please, by all means, you have a fantastic mind, please continue to bestow upon me the candor we enjoyed earlier.” Rolf invited and couldn’t help but let his own grin grow as hers did the same.  

“His Lordship is handsome to be sure. However I have heard rumors from his previous tutors that his Lordship is supposed to be uncommonly clever and brilliant and so far I do not find him to be so. All of his gambles were, and continue to be- reckless and stupid. The other ladies loose on purpose so as to make him out to be the winner anyway and it wasn’t because he was dealt bad cards, it was because he played good cards badly. If he were to loose so they would gain on purpose is one thing but what he is doing is another. It was too easy to win against him, that is why I do not play with him now, he would loose this entire estate and I do not like to take unfair advantage of him or any other stupid person, it’s just not right.” Emily answered softly so that only Rolf would hear her. “To be such a Lord and to know that all this rests on his shoulders, he would know since birth to be more careful. It is as if he lives in a fantasy of his own making just like every other Lord and Noble who likes to squander their resources I know- and I do not care for it. And his conversation is lacking. It’s as deep as a puddle. He’s supposed to have some of the best education in all of Europe and so far he does not live up to his reputation. I’ve made mentions and references of the classics and the well known riddles and rhetoric and he responds as if I am speaking gibberish. I am profoundly disappointed.” Emily explained and Rolf was ready to kiss her because she saw through it without realizing it and she was a woman who knew her stuff and when he had overheard her conversations over the course of the card game, he was inwardly groaning and fighting not to join in himself because everything she said went over his replacement’s head and Rolf wanted to know her opinions on everything because she was educated and informed about everything she tried talking about. To have anyone be as educated as himself, his father and his brother was a rare treat and delight and his stand in, while knowledgeable about how to run an estate and how to take care of lord and guest alike, was severely lacking in all other topics but she was the only one to make it show. And he could do nothing but respect her for it. And respect her for staying true to herself and not dumb-ing herself down to flatter his replacements like the other girls instantly had.

“So what can you tell me about the cave under the manor, unless you must be getting back to your duties.” Emily initiated since she had his attention for the moment, might as well benefit from it and enjoy it.

“There is a natural gas leak into the cave system under the manor that spontaneously combusts. You should stay away from it.” Rolf warned her but instead of shock and horror at that revelation, he found a smug grin meeting his statement which was intriguing him to say the least.  

“Too late, I found it last night, my grandmother wrote a letter to me- in it she told me to go ‘where death is eminent for the treasure of life’ along with a key to the door and I intend to do the opposite of that.” Emily revealed as she pulled a key out of her little purse, which was already stuffed with her winnings for the briefest of moments and Rolf blinked in surprise at her.

“Then if you insist on returning to that place, please permit me to join you, it would be improper for such a Lady as yourself to get injured on these grounds.” Rolf insisted- eager to leave the drawing room and the mindless banter and the disingenuous laughter. Even more eager to spend time one and one with her, even as improper as that was.  

“Could we go now?” Emily asked as her features lit up with excitement.

“Of course.” Rolf answered.

“I believe I’ll get changed into proper attire first.” Emily said as she left and dressed into Freddy’s lower clothes which were simply what he wore when he wanted to be comfortable before Freddy and Rolf’s brother Fits joined them as Rolf tried and failed not to look at the shapeliness of her legs and hips. Thinking that women in trousers, well her in trousers was quite becoming actually. He wondered what she would be like riding astride on a horse or better yet, riding astride him but he quickly tried and failed to push that thought from his head.

“So where are we going then?” Freddy asked.

“To the burning caves under the house, care to join me?” Emily beamed happily as she put all the letters and put them into a small leather satchel for later reference.

“But of course.” Freddy agreed as he changed into some lower clothes too and the four of them set off and Rolf watched in fascination as Emily seemed to know exactly where she was going as if she had grown up here herself as they took a lantern and with Emily once again opening the door with her key, they gained entry and started traversing the caves.

“How well have you explored these caves Sir Rolf?” Emily asked Rolf.

“Please, just Rolf, Lady Bellim.” Rolf corrected, he wanted her to use his name, that title would do him little good down here. He hated it down here and only came down here when absolutely necessary or from a direct order of his father to retrieve something in particular.

“If you are going to dispense with formality, in my case then I ask that you do the same. Emily, please.” Emily insisted as she shook hands with him as they were soon grinning happily at each other.

“So back to my question, how well have you explored these caves Rolf?” Emily asked.

“Not well at all.” Rolf professed as they trudged through, the lantern turned up so as to light up the caves better.

“And you?” Emily asked Fits.

“This is the first time in them My Lady.” Fits answered nervously, their father always threatened them with throwing them in here as punishment growing up and he was nearly pissing himself in fear, but as such Freddy and himself had already dispensed with formality and had talked all through the card game and Fits was already becoming loath to leave Freddy’s side.

“Please, Emily, we are all friends here are we not?” Emily asked.

“Indeed we are Emily.” Fits beamed. He could see what his brother liked about her. She had an ease to her that most girls did not before the gas ignited and they all dove down to the ground, Fits and Freddy falling to try to shield each other and Emily as Rolf shielded Emily completely with himself and once the flames extinguished the four got up and dusted themselves off.

“Well that was exciting.” Emily beamed happily, happy that Rolf hadn’t tried to sneak a feel of her at all, simply tried to protect her courageously, which she thought was sweet of him as he helped her back up to her feet.

“You are the only one who could think so Emily.” Fits grumbled, having nearly fainted when that happened.

“The breeze is coming from over there.” Freddy realized when he licked his finger to feel the direction of the breeze more keenly.

“Yes but our expedition earlier proved that there is nothing in that direction but a vent in a ceiling, I came to see if these caves are connected to the water.” Emily explained as Fits and Rolf looked at each other in surprise. She was smarter than they had estimated. “So in my experience, head closer to the humidity and downwards.” Emily suggested before they came to a fork. One leading upwards while the other went downwards.

“The gas likes to gravitate towards elevation, thus why it ignites in the ceiling, we will be safer if we head downwards if we were to head upwards the ignition line will only lower to our level and burn us up for sure.” Emily noted as Fits grew even more afraid and Freddy, took a leap and held onto Fits’ hand as the two clung to one another as Emily grinned encouragingly at Freddy.

“Do you know fear at all Emily?” Rolf asked as they went further down the second tunnel grabbing her hand to steady her decent as he went first before her through the deepening charred guano that was starting to get wetter in shallower depths.

“Of course I do, it is because I respect it so that I have gotten this far.” Emily answered. “Do you know why there was screaming last night?” Emily asked Rolf seemingly as an afterthought.

“I do not, when we came upon the other guests, they claimed they had seen ghosts.” Rolf only partially lied, himself and his brother and father and half the staff dressing up as ghosts to scare their guests away on purpose.

“Well it can be argued that most estates are haunted. The unspeakable acts usually unfolded within the walls of the wealthy and powerful make them such.” Emily reasoned.

“I do hope you have never been a victim of such atrocities?” Rolf ventured, appalled that she would be resigned to such a notion, wanting to protect her from such crimes.

“Of course I have, I’m an orphan and heiress to an estate, I have known nothing but. Talk seriously with any Mistress and she’ll tell you the horrors of every Lord. I am lucky in that I have a choice in the matter, most in my position do not.” Emily returned and Rolf found himself helpless to not respect such an answer.

“However, upon hearing statements from the other guests, I do wonder if perhaps several servants were simply under sheets with holes cut out for the eyes, based on the fact that ghosts cast neither shadow or make human sounds, like snickering laughter and loud thundering steps when they run. Surely if I see a ghost I am throwing my cross at it and if it goes right through, it’s a real ghost, if it makes contact with something solid, it is simply a joke-ster. I have heard rumors that Lord Sparta does enjoy a good ruse, it would not surprise me in the least if he put his own servants up to scaring his own guests.” Emily mused as she watched Rolf and Fits look away guiltily and narrowed her eyes playfully as her grin grew smug.

“Well surely if I get approached by such a ghost, there are plenty suits of armor in the halls, I shall not hesitate to grab a spear or javelin and run them through with it.” Emily professed.

“And Emily is quite inept at throwing things, like a modern David and Goliath.” Freddy boasted as Rolf and Fits looked at each other worriedly as they both made mental notes to not even attempt to scare her later and would be warning the others of that to leave Emily and Freddy alone lest something tragic happen.  

“I have heard rumors that you are uncommonly clever and brave. I am blessed to know these rumors are true, his Lordship would be a fool for not wanting you like all the rest.” Rolf praised, changing the subject.

“That buffoon upstairs? No thank you. Although being mistress of these caves would be a wonder but I doubt I shall ever get to explore them again. As soon as he chooses a bride and the real prize is revealed, I’m sure we will all be sent home. But this has been a most fun game and I’ll mourn it’s loss when it’s done.” Emily returned as Fits snickered a laugh at Emily’s bluntness as Rolf could only stare at her in awed amazement.  

“You would make the best mistress of these caves.” Fits praised.

“Thank you, that is the highest praise I’ve ever received.” Emily beamed happily before they heard the flames light up again and they all dove to the ground once again. Rolf, shielding Emily with himself again as Fits and Freddy did the same to each other and Emily true to Emily’s guess, the flames only hugged the ceiling this time and quickly running up towards the other passages. Knowing they all would have been dead for sure if they hadn’t followed her direction.

“Ha! I knew it! They do lead to the water!” Emily beamed as she found a stream as Rolf was careful with the lantern to only light up the stream, the mass of their fortune in giant chests on the other side of the stream along with the stairwell that led directly to his father’s room and he didn’t want Emily to see that part. Although if she was brave enough to traverse these caves perhaps she was entitled to it on that merit alone.

“Come on.” Emily urged them.

“Woah, woah, woah, what are you doing?” Rolf stopped her when she made a run for the stream.

“I’m going to ride down the waterfall it’s not that tall, I’ve jumped from higher. You go feet first.” Emily giggled and Rolf just smiled brighter at her. She was perfect.  

“Not without me.” Rolf said once he grabbed a firm hold onto her hand and they both made a run for the stream and jumped in together, both of them cackling with laughter as their splash extinguished the lantern.  

“Is she always like that?” Fits asked Freddy as they clung to each other in the darkness.  

“Yeah, come on, before the cave alights again.” Freddy said as he led Fits over to the river’s edge as they both jumped in hand in hand too.

“I have never in my life, done anything like this.” Fits admitted with a laugh as they felt the stream carry them down before, in an act of courage kissed Freddy before Freddy kissed him back.

“Isn’t this so much fun?” Emily asked Rolf as they floated further down stream as they both fought to keep their heads above water while still keeping a hold of each other.

“It is.” Rolf laughed despite himself before the mouth of the falls appeared.

“Ok feet first!” Emily laughed as she gripped his hand even tighter before they both yelled in delight as they plummeted to the lake below followed closely by Freddy and Fits who both hollered loudly as Rolf and Emily laughed before they made sure they were all ok before they swam to the shore and once on land the four of them laughed until they were crying and continued to talk all the way back to the estate.

“It would be a pleasure to be your friend Rolf and if I could ever steal you away from his Lordship, I would, in heartbeat.” Emily offered to Rolf once he dropped her off at her room while Freddy went with Fits to get some clean dry clothes in his own temporary room because that kiss ignited their own fire.  

“Only if you’ll allow me the same opportunity.” Rolf returned charmingly.

“Deal.” Emily grinned as she handed him her hand for him to shake again as he shook it before he kissed her hand affectionately and that kiss sent a shivering, delightful tingle throughout Emily’s body, the first kiss she had ever received to elicit such a reaction from her before she, out pure rebelliousness did the same to him which made him blush and smile bashfully. He really loved her now before she felt even bolder and used her hold on his hand and pulled him in to kiss him before he kissed her back, framing her beautiful face with his hands as she wrapped her arms around him to pull him flush with herself and felt the heat of his body come through their drenched clothes.

“You should get dressed for dinner Emily.” Rolf insisted even though he wanted to take things further but knew if he did, the jig would be up and he confess to everything and he would ruin it all.

“You’re right, forgive me for...” Emily began, slightly embarrassed that she wanted more. But not at all ashamed that she wanted it from him rather than Lord Sparta himself.

“Nothing to forgive.” Rolf cut her off and Emily just smiled wider at him.

Over dinner Emily naturally sat at the other end of the table away from her hosts to let the other girls and their families try their hand and wooing them. She was beyond disinterested and she ate quite a bit, as if it was her last meal there and the food was beyond delicious and so she gorged herself as if at any moment, Lord Sparta would dismiss her and Freddy- to bid them to go home as Fits and Rolf waited on them, sneaking the best and most delicious wine to them. But to Emily’s surprise, his Lordship didn’t bid her goodbye. However when she came back to her room for the evening, she found the #5 letter pinned to her door and Emily grinned when she realized the game was still being played as she took it and put it with the others and grinned wider when it started to make even more sense. Like a giant puzzle.

“Emily? Would you mind if I spent the night with another?” Freddy asked as he came to stand beside her.

“As long as it’s Fits, I don’t mind one bit.” Emily returned proudly.

“Then don’t mind.” Freddy grinned triumphantly as he kissed her cheek sweetly and got his things and left again. Soon after the doors locked again and Emily simply shrugged and sighed contentedly as she got ready for bed, adding another blanket to the bed so she would stay warm and she slept so soundly she didn’t wake to hear the screams of the other guests through the night knowing that it was a hoax and that there was nothing to really fear at all.

In the morning, she found she had actual attendants to help her with her hair and dressing along with a new necklace. Emily frowned as she allowed them to put the necklace on her. But at breakfast she saw one family leaving already, the girl crying that she wanted to stay and strolled right up to the young Lord Sparta, the one she was supposed to be wooing but had no interest in doing so.

“Lord Sparta.” Emily began as she curtsied.

“Yes good morning Lady Bellim.” He smiled charmingly at her.

“Is Lady Willowbe being sent home by your Lordship or is she going home of Lord Willowbe’s will?” She asked.

“Both, Lady Bellim.” He answered.

“Why? Did not your Lordship take delight in her? She seemed quite happy to compete for your attention. Why not send me home instead to allow her to stay?” Emily inquired.

“Because you are still playing the game. She sought to cheat.” He answered.

“Lord Sparta, I have already cheated, I’ve stolen some of the other guests’ letters.” Emily confessed.

“No, that does not break the rules at all,” he argued as Emily simply frowned in confusion at him.  

“Could you please tell me all the rules then? I would not like to break them by accident and forfeit my place in the game then.” Emily returned.

“No, where would the fun be in that?” He grinned before he walked off leaving Emily to think over his words. Maybe he was smarter than she gave him credit for and maybe he was playing dumb on purpose the day before.  

After breakfast they went to the drawing room as the girls showed off their accomplishments with the piano forte’s and songs and poetry and Emily begrudgingly participated only because Lord Sparta invited her to do so that flirted with demanded in tone as she was almost predisposed to tell him to ‘piss off’ before she indulged him and the other guests in doing as requested before she played another game with him and was surprised when he was a much better player this time but Emily still felt as if everything was wrong about him. After games, they went to the garden to try to get through the maze and Emily grabbed a hold of Rolf again.

“I do not wish to go through this maze with Lord Sparta, I’d much prefer to go through it with you.” Emily told him and smiled when he smiled in turn.

“Of course My Lady.” Rolf offered his elbow to her to escort her through it and smiled again when she hugged his arm and seemed to have a system to go through the maze reaching out and keeping her right hand continuously on the wall to her right. Another piece of advice given to her by her grandmother.

“I must confess something Rolf.” She began as they found a lonely corner of the maze, away from the gazes and ears of the others.

“Surely you have done nothing to be confessed to.” Rolf began.

“On the contrary I continuously do things wrong that must be confessed to. I am not playing the game fairly. I stole some of the other’s guests letters.” Emily confessed again.

“I believe that’s one of the ways to play the game Emily.” Rolf answered, albeit a little apologetically since he could clearly see she wasn’t enjoying herself around his replacement.

“Then if you have such knowledge, won’t you share it with me Dear Rolf?” Emily asked, giving him a hopeful yet pleading look and Rolf would have given every coin he had to continue to hear her talk to him so endearingly and affectionately for the rest of his life.

“I only know some of the rules but I will tell them to you.” Rolf answered before he told her all that he knew that his own father had told him.

“Would Fits know more?” Emily asked as they neared the center of the maze.

“No, Fits and I were told all of that together.” He told her and thought her pout of disappointment was absolutely adorable. “But his Lordship’s finery does look quite fetching on you.” Rolf praised as he appreciated how good Emily looked in his late mother’s necklace and had to laugh when Emily rolled her eyes.

“He is wasting it on me. While I do not wish to offend his Lordship by not wearing it. It does not endear him to me. If anything it poses to push me farther away from him because every other Lord tries to woo me with jewels. I suppose it was his late mother’s necklace, judging by how fine it is. I dare not take it with me when he sends me home.” Emily insisted.

“How can you be so certain that you will be sent home?” Rolf asked.

“Because I have no interest in his Lordship. I do not flatter him, I do not fawn over him. If he is the only prize in this game perhaps I should forfeit now. I simply do not care for him. Yesterday he was overly stupid, today he is trying too hard to be overly clever. He is all wrong. It is as if he’s a first time actor trying to play the role of his Lordship and he keeps getting his lines wrong. Besides, I’d much rather spend more time with you, I feel you’d play better games and provide better banter for me anyway.” Emily praised as she hugged his arm tighter before he stopped and couldn’t help but kiss her again, happy that she pulled him flush with herself first and leaned her head up to kiss him, having realized he wanted to kiss her and realizing she wanted to be kissed for once, if only by him though.

“Do not play the game for him then, play it for me, if you win, you can have me as the prize instead.” Rolf whispered when they broke for air.

“You drive a very hard bargain Dearest. Very well, only for you then.” Emily begrudgingly agreed before she kissed him again, feeling quite addicted to his kisses already.

The next day, they did some riding and shooting, Emily not holding back and hitting more birds than young Lord Sparta did. Rolf unbelievably pleased that Emily was the only one genuinely trying while the rest of the ladies refused to try more than once, Emily saving the dogs more than once because of how bad those ladies were at shooting. Emily was also the only woman to wear browns, tweeds and trousers so she could ride astride the horses and not spook the game while all the other ladies wore bright colors and pretty dresses and had to ride side saddle and could move no faster than a walk on the horses while Freddy, Fits, Rolf and Emily got to run and canter all over the country side as much as their hearts desired. Rolf put Emily on his own favorite horse which was one of the faster ones in the stables and watched as she rode it just as well as he usually did and in dead runs, she won out, leaping and jumping over logs and boulders with ease, not caring in the least if she got dirty because she was genuinely having fun and it was a sight for Rolf to see while his ears eagerly took in the sounds of her delighted laughter and conversation.

Over the course of the week, Emily tried to play more fairly and more nicely with her competitors and his Lordship and every other morning, another girl was sent home but that evening Emily got a new letter pinned to her door until the end of the week. She felt she had all but one of the Fibonacci sequence pages and understood most of it until it was herself and one other lady were all that remained, the other lady being Viscountess Eliza from England and Eliza stared cloaked daggers at Emily every time she looked at her. Emily however was undisturbed by this and Rolf simply watched with pride as Emily seemingly took it all in stride and let Eliza’s actions and sugar coated venom-ed words roll off of her like water from a duck’s back. While Emily did her best to befriend her host, Lord Sparta, she could not harbor feelings for him besides the polite platonic kind since her budding romance with Rolf bloomed more and more each day, he even came up with mini games just for the two of them to play which she was keen to play and win if only because she was playing with Rolf over everyone else. Usually he would have been scared she saw straight through the ruse but at the same time, he didn’t care. He really liked her and was starting to really love her and adored her and missed her when they parted for the night and it was getting harder and harder to play the role of a servant but his own servant who was playing his role took it with stride as the two tried to help each other with their reversed roles.

At the end of the week, Emily found herself walking through the greenhouse with Rolf, who seemed to be her constant companion when Freddy was no where to be found, the few times he did show up, was simply to tell her that he was fine and that he was currently getting lost in Fits which she congratulated him for and was happy that he was finding love and happiness, even as unintended as it was.

“Do you know if his Lordship will make his decision soon?” Emily asked as she wanted to smell every fragrant bloom in the greenhouse and was currently nose deep in the most fragrant roses.

“Why do you ask?” Rolf asked, not wanting his time with her to end, ever.

“Well Freddy is quite in love with Fits and I don’t want to separate them by loosing to the game too early and I do enjoy your company and I would be loathed to part from you and I’m prepared to make an offer for you from his Lordship but I do not know if he will part with you and Fits but this is proving tortuous for Eliza and I don’t wish for needless suffering.” Emily reasoned and Rolf was burning up inside, wanting to tell her everything but couldn’t.

“Are you missing home at all?” Rolf asked, trying to change the subject again.

“Yes and no. I miss my servants who are proving to be the few loyal friends I have anymore.” Emily admitted as she pet the petals of a lily before smelling it and smiling softly at the scent. “Truth is I have very few friends indeed. All ladies my age are my competitors, all men period are usually my suitors and they look at me and see a pretty face behind a large purse, a trophy to put in a glass case or a gilded cage, or better yet some kind of wild animal they hope to tame to stroke their own egos or the living embodiment of His Holiness that they can attain. Or worse yet, money grabbers who think I have a grand fortune and will receive even greater once my grandmother passes. But it’s all a lie. I live a very modest life, barely getting by some years. The estate took most of my inheritance and the wages of the servants and doctors and caretakers of my grandmother take the rest of it. All the finery I wear is actually “gifts” from all the other nobles and lords- payment for coyly flirting with them for a week at a time, feeding them crumbs of false hope that they are “wearing me down” to accept them. I hate it. It makes me feel like a harlot, selling my attention like that. Never myself mind you but still, far too close for my liking. I refuse to sell my pride or my self respect though. Perhaps it’s that- that everyone else is after and while I spend my birthday week at the Vatican with his Holiness, he barely remembers me anymore. That cross I wore is the only thing he’s ever bestowed upon me and I do not have the heart to ask him for anything. I’m not noble by blood, my blood is no more noble than yours is, I was just blessed at birth and my father got promoted to his station when the previous holder of it died. My mother was a camp follower for Christ’s sake and while everyone treats me like I’m royalty I know they only do so until I choose someone, then once the truth about me is found out, they’ll treat me like the trash I think they all secretly think I am. The only power I have is my ability to see things for the way they are and say no.” Emily confessed as she smelled the fragrant jasmine before sitting down to tea with Rolf that was just brought to them.

“Then don’t play to such horrible people Dearest.” Rolf said simply.

“I would love nothing more than to take your advice and simply quit it all but I have the livelihoods of many who depend on me. My grandmother is nearly senile and caring for her is very costly, that’s why I gamble, all my winnings go to actually taking care of myself and feeding and clothing myself because my living can not sustain myself to the degree everyone expects of me and my estate and my grandmother. Freddy’s father is about to be considered senile himself and is at risk of being enemies with the state every time he goes into a tirade rant. I don’t know how much longer either of us can hold out.” Emily worried, showing her rare vulnerable side, but only because she felt she knew she could trust Rolf with such things, he had never taken advantage of her and always waited until she initiated contact first.

“It sounds like you’re tired My Dear.” Rolf surmised.

“I am.” Emily huffed a laugh as she sipped her tea. “The tea is delicious today, what kind is this again?” Emily asked.

“You see that bright red flower on that bush right there?” Rolf asked as he pointed to the blooms in question as Emily nodded yes in confirmation. “That is a hibiscus, this is tea made from the flowers.” Rolf answered.

“Such a beautiful flower makes equally beautiful tea.” Emily grinned happily as she continued to drink it and savor it.

“I’ve noticed you have a healthy appetite. Most ladies pick at their foods like delicate birds, I know the cooks work hard on the food and it seems like you’re the only one who enjoys it and it makes me happy to see you enjoy the meals.” Rolf praised as he watched her try all the cakes, having asked the cooks to really outdo themselves to make something that she would deem as her favorite so he could lavish it on her.

“They do work very hard and I do thoroughly enjoy everything and it feels like a waste if I do not at least try all of it. I don’t care if I appear gluttonous with the others, back at home I usually eat whatever the servants cook for themselves because it’s more cost effective if I do. A lot of expense can be spent on just a meal for myself, my grandmother already needs such a special diet, I would prefer for her to eat well rather than myself. You’d be surprised how long I can subsist on soups and stews with breads alone.” Emily confessed before she continued to devour the special lemon and berry cakes, quite liking those. “Although I must say, this is exquisite, I could eat a case of these.” Emily noted as Rolf beamed happily at her as he made a mental note of that.  

“Maybe your fortune will change and you’ll be able to eat like you do here all the time, wherever you go, especially at home.” Rolf offered.

“Don’t curse me like that.” Emily returned with a frown.

“Curse? What curse? How is that a curse?” Rolf asked in astonishment.

“Because the only way that will happen is if I marry a Lord, one of the overstuffed buffoons who try to tempt me with such things. I would rather come here and serve as a maid and eat whatever the servants here eat if it means I can eat with you every day. I am not above such things. It would be honest work and I’d be happy making honest money for honest work. Granted in order to do that, my grandmother would probably have to die first and I’d have to sell the estate and that would probably pull my heart and soul from my body to do but if that’s how I have to survive then so be it. I can only hope the next mistress treats my friends well.” Emily explained.

“I will give you every coin I have to make sure that never happens.” Rolf offered.

“Oh hush, don’t speak of such nonsense. I would never ask that of you. You’ve earned your wages and you should use them to take care of yourself and your own loved ones, surely you have family outside of this estate who needs those funds more than I. I can get by, I obviously do. I know how hard life can be for servants no matter their master. Use it for those in a worse state than I. I just wanted you to know the truth of the matter. Every other man has their own fantasy of my fortune and I don’t have the heart to tell them it’s already gone. You have been honest with me, I need to be honest with you in return. You deserve more than the false hope I feel I have to shell out to everyone else. You deserve the truth. You deserve better than I could ever hope to give you.” Emily insisted and Rolf both wanted to break down and cry or throw up from guilt but at the same breath, confess to his own truth. Feeling she deserved it in turn and could barely stomach this charade any longer. He waited until she was done chewing and swallowed before he kissed her tenderly. Feeling bad for kissing her instead of telling her the truth. But kissing her was the best and easiest thing he could do for now.  

“And you deserve better than I could ever give you. If you truly wish to stay with me here, I’ll make the arrangements, if you want me to go home with you, I will, without a second thought or hesitation, the Count and his Lordship be damned. Just give me a little bit more time my dearest Emily.” Rolf breathed as he stroked her gorgeous face before she turned her head slightly to kiss his palm as her hands came to rest over his own. Usually she would have been on the other side of the greenhouse to keep space between herself and everyone else but she wanted to be close to him and she craved his touch and his closeness as much as her body craved breath and every moment they could steal away and enjoy their privacy like this, she cherished. Her own grandmother be damned for marrying ‘beneath’ her. She loved Rolf and since she had the power to choose for herself, she was going to choose him, no matter the cost.

“Alight.” Emily nodded in agreement.

The next morning however at breakfast there were still only two girls left, Emily and Eliza and his lordship did not come to breakfast instead another attendant came and made an announcement.

“Miss Eliza, you are the winner of the grand game, please turn in your letter to receive your prize.” He announced and Eliza lit up with excitement and quickly handed over her letter that she had not let Emily look at- at all and had horded and guarded this whole time as Emily blew out a breath of relief before she offered her congratulations to Eliza for a game well played and won.

“Miss Emilia, your prize for being the runner up.” The attendant said as he handed Emily the last letter.

“Thank you.” Emily beamed as she took it and added it to the others.

“Where are all the rest of them? I had page 144.” Eliza frowned.

“Have you ever heard of Fibonacci, Miss Eliza?” Rolf asked as he came strutting into the room, wearing his proper clothes with his attendant, who had been parading as Lord Sparta following behind him dressed in his proper steward in training clothes.

“Fiba- who?” Eliza asked in confusion as Emily did a double take and just gasped in shock and stared in stunned silence at Rolf, her mouth hanging open almost comically as her eyes were wide before she remembered to cover her mouth with her hand. Rolf looked so handsome dressed up before she realized all the signs that he had been Lord Sparta all along. No servant should have been so candid and conversational with her but she had been so desperate for his kindred companionship she hadn’t cared to notice the impropriety of it before she just couldn’t help but smile to herself before smiling adoringly at to him- her eyes welling with tears as she wanted to cry from her overwhelming emotions. She should have known all along, normally she would have been furious being tricked like this but she didn’t care. Her prize of Rolf- had not changed and she was happy to have him in whatever form he would take. Then she took her necklace off, the very piece that was the late Countess Sparta’s necklace and threw it at him jokingly to make sure he wasn’t a ghost himself which got both of them to laugh as he easily caught it.

“Fibonacci, is a famed mathematician, he had a formula for numbers, start with zero, zero plus one, is one again, one plus one is two, one plus two is three, two plus three is five and so on and so forth, adding the previous two numbers to get to the next.” Emily answered Eliza’s question as Emily showed Eliza all the letters and pointed to the numbers in the upper right hand corner as Eliza realized she was the victim of a cruel trick herself and stared hatefully at the very man she had been trying to ensnare all week.

“So are you my prize then? A servant?” Eliza sneered at the manservant.

“Of course not my Lady, your prize is this.” He answered as he placed a simple but small bar of gold in front of her. “Is this not what you have been digging and vying for all this time?” He taunted before she huffed and took the bar of gold and got up and stormed off to her rooms with it as she quickly got ready to leave before Rolf put his mother’s necklace back on Emily.

“Thank you for not actually throwing a spear Dearest.” Rolf gently teased as he touched her shoulders affectionately and kissed the back of her head.

“Next time.” Emily teased back as she looked up at him, looking at his handsome face upside down, the two laughed again before Emily turned her attention back to the steward in training.

“So what is your real name Sir?” Emily asked the manservant with a grin.

“Byron.” He said as he held his hand out to shake hers.

“Pleasure to meet you Sir Byron.” Emily greeted him. “And if I can just say, you make a terrible lord.” Emily teased which earned a laugh from everyone, especially Bryon and Rolf and his father- William as Rolf sat down next to her as William sat at the head of the table as Freddy and Fits finally reappeared, having done nothing but lay together and draw closer all week in Fits’ real room. Fits sat to the left his father and Freddy sat on the other side of Fits and sat in Eliza’s seat across from Emily as Freddy beamed proudly at Emily for being the real winner of the grand game.  

“This my dear Emily, is your prize.” Rolf said as he put a ring box on the table in front of Emily before Emily put her stack of letters down on the table between them to open it and found an engagement ring, a smaller miniature version of the pink panther diamond they had found and returned earlier that week before Emily offered her left hand so Rolf could put the ring onto her hand.

“And I am honored to receive such a prize.” Emily returned as she just smiled adoringly at Rolf before turning her attention to his father William. “And I must applaud you Count Sparta for putting together such a fantastic game, I see from the rules that you yourself are very well read, pulling from the great minds of the masters of the Renaissance especially.” Emily praised Lord Sparta who beamed happily at her.

“And I must applaud you for seeing so easily through the guises.” He returned. “You will bring much to this family, if you choose to stay.” He returned to her.

“I believe I will.” Emily grinned as she squeezed Rolf’s hand from under the table. “But I must also tell you that my estate is a mere fraction of what most think it to be. All the wealth I had has been put towards the upkeep of the manor and care of my own servants who I count as friends.” Emily revealed.

“And it is because you invested your funds as such that made you such an invaluable treasure, when my son told me as such I knew you had won the game and so I put an end to it today, not wanting you to suffer any more than you already have, especially at that horrid girl’s lack of manners. You are by far the most superior lady I have ever come in contact with besides my own dear Contessina and I know you will look after this estate with the same care you do your own manor. That is why I gave your grandmother the key to the letters and the key to the caves, because if you were brave enough to traverse them, you will no doubt bravely walk next my son through life.” Lord Sparta smiled appreciatively at her. “When Rolf said he wanted to marry, I devised this plan so that not only would a wise and brilliant woman figure it out, but a brave and courageous yet kind heart-ed woman would win my son. I understand you are quite the problem solver and the beholder of many fantastic ideas, I’d love to hear them if you will be so kind as to share them with us.” Lord Sparta invited as she blushed and smiled bashfully at such praise, but knowing it was sincere- meant the world to her.

“If you will send for Fredrick’s father, who is not just a brilliant scientist but inventor as well, I believe together we can find a solution to the gas problem, I think if you could manage to collect it and harness it safely and keep it from self igniting. It would prove very useful.” Emily began.

“Then please do tell.” Lord Sparta invited before Emily took a deep breath and began to tell him all sorts of ideas as she felt the same ease and free-ness she would feel at home.

That night after rounds of games and cards with the real lords and being thrilled to finally play them well with her fiance and his father, brother and Freddy and in return, be played well with. Rolf led Emily to his real quarters since one of the rules of the game were that no lady would lie with anyone for the duration of the game and now that the game was over, they were both more than eager to be together before her things were put into the room as well to stay with him until the wedding that would be planned the next day.

“At last, we can be completely alone.” Rolf breathed in relief once they were both undressed and redressed in their night clothes but Emily had quickly and easily stripped out of her night gown the moment they were under the covers as Rolf did the same.

“Yes, at last.” Emily giggled as Rolf had Emily roll on top of him and ride him just like he had imagined all week, wanting Emily to continue to have all the control she wanted, both of them moaning at finally being joined as they kissed each other very deeply and Emily felt no ill feelings at being touched and caressed, instead of feeling dread, she felt at ease and happiness in addition to be wanted but more importantly treasured and respected most of all as she put his hands to her body without a hint of embarrassment or shyness. “Please my Dearest Emily, tell me and instruct me how to please you best.” Rolf pleaded desperately, wanting and needing to give her every pleasure and Emily could have cried she was so moved by such a sentiment that she told him exactly how and was blown away when he was able to pull from her body and soul the sweetest of pleasured releases as she did the same to him.

“You will be the best Lady Sparta.” Rolf praised as he laid next to Emily and wiped the sweat from his brow as they both panted as they recovered, their bodies still alight with delight.

“Only if you’ll be the best Lord Sparta, forever at my side.” Emily returned as she found herself in his embrace once again.

“Always.” Rolf smiled before he kissed her again.

“And quit kissing me instead of telling me things. I realized you kissed me instead of telling me the truth all week, you must stop that this instant, please tell me everything from now on.” Emily insisted.

“I was under oath from my father! I had very little choice in the matter, I swear.” Rolf insisted as Emily gave him a playfully unimpressed look.

“I swear on my mother’s grave I told you all I could without ruining the game. If I did, the game would be over and forefit and I could never hope to see you or speak to you again, those were the rules placed upon me.” Rolf swore as Emily gave him a softened hard look but detected he was telling her the truth.

“Very well, but I have a favor to ask of you Dearest.” Emily began.

“Anything.” Rolf returned.

“My grandmother’s doctors have advised me that my grandmother can not be moved from the house. Would you mind terribly moving to my estate until she passes? It can not be long now.” Emily requested.

“I wouldn’t mind at all, we could leave as soon as you wish.” Rolf immediately answered.

“Thank you My Love.” Emily cooed as she kissed him again, in the morning, they did indeed plan for their wedding and even agreed on invitations while the servants got everything ready for their departure and the very next day after that Rolf had an entire chest of gold and treasure put onto one of his father’s very grand and very luxurious dormeuse, with his brother and Freddy taking another with yet another chest with them. Freddy already wearing some of Fits clothes while Rolf had already ordered loads of dresses for Emily so that she would always be the most well dressed woman in the room that would rival even royalty and once inside the carriage, Emily giddily closed the curtains so that her and Rolf could continue to enjoy maritals on the journey home.

[imustspeakmyheart]

I have a arum headcanon a friend of mine came up with after i introduced her to the podcast. She says that when he gets tickled or nuzzled under his neck frill, his tktktk's get really fast and high pitched and honestly I've never had anything melt my heart as much as that headcanon. if you can use that as a prompt thatd be adorable make the lizard boy blush plz

anon this was such a cute idea i had to make this the first request i filled, saints bless u. one flustered lizard under the cut, or find it on ao3 here

I still take SC requests, so feel free to send me anything else!

When she first heard it, Rilla was in the kitchen sorting out her various jars and pots of herbs. She’d left her boys in the living room area, since Damien was useless at helping her with this and during the Fall season Arum always liked having a warm body wrapped around him. Damien, of course, had been happy to offer himself.

She was humming to herself as she worked, opening each jar and making sure that the signified herb was really all that was in there, as well as checking whether she needed to refill any of them. It happened quite often now that Arum had different ideas about sorting things than she did, and well, chaos happened, basically. She did her best to combat that problem and it helped that she knew that Arum at least tried to keep up with her sorting methods. .

Suddenly, she heard a noise from the living room. A rising sound, not unlike Arum’s rattles but higher in pitch and faster than usual. Putting her work down she padded over to the living room to check, finding her boys as she left them, lounging on the small couch with Damien settled on Arum’s lap.

One thing was different, though. Arum’s frill was raised somewhat and from her angle she could just see Damien’s face nuzzling the soft skin that lay underneath. The rattling continued and when Rilla walked around the couch to look closer, she grinned. Both of them appeared to have dozed off and the sound was coming from Arum without him seeming to notice.

Saints, they’re so adorable, Rilla thought to herself, soft smile on her face. She watched them for a moment longer before leaning over them and gently nudging Damien’s head away from Arum’s frill. He made some vague noises in his sleep and wrinkled his nose in the cutest way, but he didn’t wake up. Neither did Arum; the rattling died down as soon as he wasn’t being nuzzled anymore. One of his arms shifted around Damien, but he remained fast asleep.

Rilla kissed each of them on the forehead and went back to her herbs, carefully filing this new bit of information about her lizard boyfriend away as something to research further.

..

She and Arum were watching Damien train in the little clearing of wood behind her cottage. One of her arms was wrapped around him, idly stroking the back of his shoulders as far as she could reach it. When her fingers ran past the edge of his frill, Rilla remembered what she’d been planning to test out.

Ever so carefully, as to not alarm her unsuspecting test subject, she nudged her fingers under Arum’s frill and lightly rubbed the softer scales underneath. The effect was immediate. Rattling filled the air, fast and loud, reminding Rilla a little bit of the purring of a cat in the way she could feel it rumble underneath her fingers.

Lord Arum seemed to not be noticing what was happening, though she did see him slowly close his eyes and imperceptibly lean closer to the touch. It lasted barely a few seconds before he stepped away from her, one of his hands flying up to the back of his neck.

“What was that?” He asked, narrowing his eyes at her and flicking out his tongue in that way she now knew to interpret as him being flustered. His hand remained protectively on his frill  .

Rilla glanced at Damien, who was still doing his exercises, seemingly not having noticed anything amiss. That was how he got when he was in the zone, nothing else existed but him and his training. She thought maybe this was a conversation they should all be having together, since it involved the anatomy of someone in their little relationship triad. She also knew, though, that Damien could get a serious dip in his mood if his training rituals got interrupted.

Arum was still watching her, but he’d moved closer again. As far as she could tell, his expression was inquisitive, not angry.  

“Uh, well. Remember the other day you were over and you fell asleep with Damien on the couch?” After an affirmative rattle from Arum, she continued. “In his sleep Damien was stroking you under your frill and you made that noise, and it was about the cutest thing I’d ever seen in my life. I just had to test it out a bit.”

She smiled at him fondly, remembering that night. They were both just so adorable, her boys. Arum’s tongue flicked out a few more times, before lowering his arm.

“I- I didn’t know that that was something…I did. Of course you had to try it again before telling me first.” Arum huffed a laugh. “Can’t have a reliable test if your test subject is in the know.”

He looked away from her, his eyes finding Damien, while his tail swung idly back and forth. When Rilla sidled up to him and took one of his hands he didn’t move away again, so she thought he was probably just processing the new information. He squeezed her fingers, watching Damien finish his last set of exercises.

“I’ll never do it again if it bothers you. It doesn’t hurt when you’re touched there, I hope?” Arum seemed to be taking it pretty well, but still some concern slipped into her voice when she asked the question. If her curious exploits had actually hurt him, she’d be pretty upset about it.

Arum shook his his head, another hand rising to pet Rilla’s hair. “No, Amaryllis. It’s just… Slightly embarrassing, I won’t lie. But it doesn’t hurt and it isn’t entirely unpleasant either. Rather nice actually. Sensitive skin and all that.” He spoke softly, looking back at Rilla and smiling.

Rilla beamed at him, then added slyly, “That’s good, because it’s absolutely adorable and I’ll need to show Damien at least once.”

“Show me what at least once?” Damien interjected at the most opportune moment, having strolled up to them with his wooden practise sword swung casually over his shoulder and a layer of sweat shining on his forehead. For a second Arum had actually forgotten that Damien was there and was overcome with the knowledge that if Rilla wasn’t going to let him live this down, then certainly Damien wouldn’t.

“Nothing,” Arum said at the same time that Rilla said, “Oh, something alright.”

Rilla’s grin grew tenfold and she held fast to Arum’s hand when she felt him pull.

“Come on Arum, let me show him, it’s cute!” Between Rilla’s enthusiasm and Damien’s overwhelmed confusion, Arum really stood no chance. He deflated, narrowing his eyes and flicking out his tongue annoyedly. Then for good measure he rolled his eyes before crouching down and letting Rilla’s fingers slip out from his.

“Fine.” He said, a petulant rattle sounding from his throat that stood in stark contrast to the high pitched sound he produced when Rilla tickled the underside of his frill immediately after he’d spoken. No mercy, that woman.

Damien observed the whole display with curiosity. Arum’s tail rustled the grass, his eyes were downcast and Rilla was so right, it was adorable. Most of all because he seemed so flustered about the whole thing.

He let out a surprised laugh and stepped closer. Arum narrowed his eyes at him when their eyes met, but he didn’t move away when careful fingers found their way under his frill to rub there.  

“It sounds like high pitched purring, how cute.”

“It does not!”

“You know what I must do now, Arum.”

“You are not going to compose an ode about this. Or a sonnet. Or a lyrical ballad.”

“When inspiration strikes, it strikes, my love.”

Rilla would say her experiment was a roaring success, the way their laughter mingled with Arum’s flustered rattles to create the most lovely sound for all the joy it signified.

[pokemaniacal]

Pokémon Moon, Episode 8: In Which I Am Given A Stern Talking-To By A Colourful Sisterly Figure

“So what you’re saying is, you almost killed my Totem Lurantis because your crazy great-grandmother would have wanted it that way?”  Mallow folds her arms as she waits for an answer. “…she had a drinking problem.  And a gambling problem.  And… several legal problems.  But she was pretty spry for 94.” “When did she…?” “Um… well, about eight years back, the law caught up with her, and she grabbed a shotgun, stole a motorbike, kidnapped the neighbours’ Heracross, and skipped town, laughing all the way.  Honestly she’s, uh… probably still kicking.  Somewhere out there.”  I idly dunk a spoon in the half-finished pot of stew from Mallow’s trial and taste it. “Mmmmmmmm, that’s so f%&£ing good. Good call on the Revival Herb, by the way.”  Mallow shudders. “Okay, well… I’m pretty sure you did technically pass my trial… somehow… so… take these, I guess.” She thrusts a sack of Nest Balls at me, then hands me her Z-Crystal, the Grassium-Z, and leaves me to explore the jungle on my own.  Now that I can encounter and catch wild Pokémon there, I am rewarded with three new ones: Bounsweet, Comfey, and Oranguru.  I’m not exactly inspired by these so far.  Bounsweet is a round, pinkish-red fruit Pokémon that brings to mind the phrase “oh, look, it’s Cherubi,” but it does evolve into something that might not be Cherrim, so we’ll give it the benefit of the doubt.  Comfey is a Hawaiian lei Pokémon, one of those Flabébé-like Fairy-types that really looks as though it should be a Grass-type and has a bunch of stuff that supports Grass-types; it’s nice and thematically appropriate to the setting but doesn’t seem to evolve, and so far doesn’t really look like it’ll measure up to a fully-evolved Florges.  The third Pokémon, Oranguru, is so far the most interesting-looking – a purple and white apelike Normal/Psychic Pokémon that fights from a cross-legged sitting position.  It too shares a Pokédex page with something else, so there’s a good chance it will evolve.

When I leave the jungle, Professor Kukui turns up to congratulate me on passing all three of Akala Island’s trials, and remind me that I’m not off the hook yet: the next step is to face Kahuna Olivia in battle, to provide amusement for whatever primitive heathen deity rules this island.  But first, he has a little diversion for me: he wants me to come and visit a facility known as the Dimensional Research Lab, back in Heahea City. “If this is your way of recruiting me to some wild goose chase of a research project that’s going to get me killed in a ridiculous sci-fi laser explosion, Kukui, I swear to Arceus…” “No, of course not!” he protests.  “At the very worst you’ll be trapped in an alien nightmare dimension with no hope of ever returning home!  It’ll be no worse than being hit simultaneously with Mean Look, Trick Room, Shadow Force, and Dark Void.”  I stare at him in silence for a solid thirty seconds. “Eh. Good enough.” 

Lillie is already at the lab when I get there, trying to teach Nebby to use Splash, of all things.  I see right through her (admittedly clever) deception, of course.  When your real goal is for your Pokémon to lay waste to a region with the most powerful move of all – Explosion – what better way of avoiding suspicion than by pretending to focus on the weakest move of all?  I’m wise to your schemes, terrorist girl.  I give her a suspicious leer, causing her to squeak in feigned shock, and we enter the lab together.  The Dimensional Research Lab is run by one Professor Burnet, who happens to be Professor Kukui’s wife (GOD DAMN IT HE’S STRAIGHT).  She is also a friend of Lillie, having… randomly discovered her and Nebby lying unconscious on a beach three months ago.  This was apparently not a significant red flag to anyone involved. Lillie claims that she had been looking for Burnet anyway, and had simply “gotten lost” on the beach before collapsing from exhaustion.  How convenient, that circumstances should align so neatly for her to gain the sympathy and enter the confidence of the very professors she had been seeking.  I squint at Lillie again, mouth the words “I’m onto you,” and start scribbling in a notebook.  She returns a look of utter bewilderment and pulls down the brim of her hat to cover her face.  More importantly, returning to the conversation at hand, Burnet is a physicist who has dedicated much of her career to the study of strange phenomena designated “ultra wormholes.”  These are, as far as I can glean, mysterious wibbly-wobbly spacey-wacey holes in reality that occasionally appear in the sky over Alola and randomly spit out powerful demon-Pokémon to terrorise the region.

…this, I point out to nobody in particular, is yet another thing that the tourism brochures mysteriously failed to mention.

Professor Burnet is evasive when I try to ask her whether she’s actually seen a wormhole, or one of these “ultra beasts,” but notes that several known Pokémon possess power over dimensions, and claims that the sensitive equipment in her lab should be able to detect the wormholes. She also explains that the four guardian deities of Alola fought against the demonic invaders in ancient times to protect their region… which suddenly makes me very nervous that Tapu Koko’s plans to ruin my holiday may go way beyond just making me fight Pokémon battles for its amusement.

Of course, the instant I leave the lab, a gigantic glowing rift in space appears briefly in the sky, as if to taunt me, before closing up a few moments later. I’m… totally going to get drafted into a war between dimensions, aren’t I?

Whatever. Not my problem.  I’m just going to get on with this trial nonsense and pretend I didn’t see th- oh, gods, what if Nebby is the vanguard of the demonic invasion???  No! Nope.  I’m not thinking about that.  Just… go find Olivia.

Kahuna Olivia lives in Konikoni City, on Akala Island’s southwest coast.  To get there, I have to travel through Alola’s take on the Diglett’s Cave, a tunnel system inhabited by Zubat and Alolan Steel Diglett.  Olivia herself is actually there when I arrive, but is apparently too busy for me and requests that I meet her at her shop in Konikoni.  What is she busy with?  Well… apparently working with some of those Aether Foundation conservationists. The Foundation rents space in an office building in Heahea City, next to Professor Burnet’s lab (and right above Game Freak’s Alola branch), though as far as I can tell they don’t actually do anything there.  Their presence in the tunnels is a response to some recent unusual Diglett activity that has been making the area dangerous for travellers and miners, which they blame on Team Skull’s shenanigans.  Well, their story checks out – further into the caves, I encounter two Team Skull grunts I don’t recognise, and battle them in tandem with Hau, who is gradually becoming almost respectable as a trainer.  That was simple enough… almost weirdly so.  Team Skull are such buffoons, and I’m not even sure what they were trying to accomplish by disturbing the Diglett. Could there be some greater design behind their nonsense…?

…nah, I’m just being paranoid.  Just because their name starts with “Team” doesn’t mean they’re going to open a dozen of these wormholes and bring about the apocalypse.

Once on the other side of the tunnel, I take a brief look around Konikoni City. It’s a colourful city with heavily Japanese-influenced architecture.  Like most big Alolan cities, it’s a hub for tourism, with markets that sell rare incenses, TMs and clothing.  Down by the cape, there’s a lighthouse, but I can’t access it (yet?), as well as a woman who not only offers to teach my Pikachu Volt Tackle, but even gives me a special Z-Crystal.  I thought these things were sacred relics!  The Pikanium-Z, when its power is unleashed by the absolute stupidest dance I have yet been taught, transforms Volt Tackle into a truly devastating super-move… Catastropika. Catastropika?  Really?  That’s the name we’re going with here, Alola?  Not, like… Pikalamity, or Pikataclysm, or just Pi-Kaboom? Seriously, the translators dropped the ball on this $#!t. Whatever.  Apparently the rules for Z-moves are a little different to what the previous crystals had led me to believe – some of them are related, like Mega Stones, to just one species, or even just one move used by that species. Then there’s Olivia’s own shop. Olivia, a Rock Pokémon specialist, sells evolutionary stones and fossils.  Contrary to her earlier promise, she’s not there, but has left her Probopass to run the shop (because… why not?) and given it a message, telling me to join her at the nearby Ruins of Life, the home of the guardian Tapu Lele. 

Ohhhhh no. No.  I’ve already got one of these ‘guardians’ lording it over me and telling me what to do, just because it… like… I don’t know, saved my life or whatever.  The last thing I need is Tapu Lele arbitrarily deciding to offer me “guidance,” or punish me for trespassing, or turn me into an attractive paperweight, or-

Ugggggggh, but on the other hand, I can totally see a couple of members of Team Skull heading for the Ruins of Life through that creepy cemetery outside town. If Olivia’s gone out there to fight them, or they’ve gone out there to attack her… well, then frankly that’s her problem, right? …right? “Zzzzzt! I dunno, boss!” the Rotomdex interjects. “Sure seemzzzz like it’d be a dick move not to at least go check it out!” “No one asked you, you cursed calculator-watch,” I mutter, but decide to go anyway.  If Olivia… somehow can’t handle those idiots, it’s bound to be my fault, one way or another. 

I do my best to pick my way respectfully through the cemetery on Memorial Hill, skirting carefully around each grave.  As I reach the other side, I spot the two Team Skull grunts – it’s “B” again, with another of his idiot friends.  But it’s not just them – there’s a Slowpoke with them, and they’re arguing with an Aether Foundation worker.  Beside her is a green-haired man with huge yellow-green glasses and a white lab coat, regarding the situation with strange detachment.  As I approach, I hear the Foundation worker shouting. “Team Skull!  Give back that Pokémon!”  The second grunt flicks a few random gang signs in her direction as he shouts his response. “Don’t give me trouble!  I’ll reduce you to rubble!” “Mmm, trouble/rubble; there’s an original one,” I interrupt, sidling up between the Aether Foundation worker and the man in the glasses.  “You know, I bet you’re the first in all the history of the English language to rhyme those two.”  I shoot the young woman a glance, and stage-whisper to her “Sarcastic enough? D’you think they’ll get it?”  She only stares at me, dumbfounded, so I shrug and turn back to the Team Skull grunts.  “Sorry, am I interrupting something?  You weren’t about to kidnap this Pokémon, were you?”  I feign a wide-eyed gasp.  “Tsk, tsk, tsk… You know, I really thought we were getting somewhere, boys, I honestly did.”  The second grunt just looks bewildered (I’m not totally sure whether I’ve met him before), but B looks like smoke is about to start pouring out of his ears.  I give him my most practiced look of sincere disappointment.  “Come on; I thought we were moving past this.  Can’t you let this one go?  For me?” I smile at him. “But- wh- you- NO!” he splutters.  “We’re gonna sell this Pokémon to get rich, and we won’t make no bones about it!  If you want it back, y- you- you’re gonna have to take it!”  I sigh and reach for a Pokéball… until the other grunt abruptly gets a look of comprehension and elbows B in the side. “Yo, homie?” he says quietly.  “This ain’t…? Is it?”  B turns to him and continues spluttering. “Wh-what you talkin’bout, dawg?” “Look, you don’t gotta let nobody step to you when your Team Skull brothers are around, ‘specially not this fool!  Take a chill pill, homie; I got your back!”  B’s gaze flicks back and forth between me and the other grunt for several seconds, then they both turn their backs to me and start arguing.  The Aether Foundation woman gives me a quizzical look, as though to ask for an explanation.  I shrug at her, but then inspiration strikes.  I hold a finger to my lips to signal for quiet, then crouch low and try to make eye contact with the Slowpoke.  It looks directly at me… then yawns and looks away.  I snap my fingers, glancing at the grunts to make sure they haven’t noticed, and the Slowpoke – with all the urgency of cold treacle – turns its stupid dopey face towards me.  I jab a finger at it and start beckoning it towards me.  A full ten seconds later, it gives a decisive nod, turns around, and begins walking directly away from me.  I roll my eyes, then glance around, grab a convenient rock, take careful aim, and throw it at the Slowpoke, striking it on the back of the head.  It turns around to face me again.  I jab my finger at it again, then point firmly at the ground beneath my feet and start beckoning once more.  This time, the blasted thing apparently gets the message and starts crawling steadily towards me.  I glance up again.  The Team Skull grunts are still deep in an animated argument about… something.  It’s definitely turning out worse for B, who is holding one hand to his face and cringing for some reason.  About a minute later, the Slowpoke reaches me.  I silently make a coo-ing face at it, and pat it gently on the head, giving a thumbs-up to the Aether Foundation girl with my other hand. “Sloooooooooooow…” the Slowpoke says, appreciatively.  This, unfortunately, gets the attention of the grunts again, who spin around to face me. “Right!” I say decisively, standing up straight and clapping my hands together. “I’m sure we all have other business to attend to today, so why don’t we all just-” but the second grunt is having none of that. “You ready?” he yells at me, grabbing a Pokéball from his belt.  “Cuz I was born ready, yo!” “Well…” I sigh, “worth a try.”  I send out my own (infinitely more responsive) Slowpoke… which turns out to be a mistake when his Pokémon is revealed as a Dark Raticate, forcing a hasty switch to my Trumbeak.  From there, though, Rock Smash makes short work of it. “That loss was pathetic!  Your moves were so kinetic!” the grunt declares, stunned.  B grumbles something under his breath, then shakes his head and shouts at me. “We don’t need that Pokémon anyway!  Take it then! Good luck and good riddance!” Both of them flee the scene.  The Aether Foundation worker breathes a sigh of relief and leans down to pat the Slowpoke. “Phew… thanks, kid.  I could’ve been in real trouble there…” “Now, now,” her companion admonishes her, speaking for the first time, “stand firm! Think of what the president would say!” “That’s what you say, Chief!  But you don’t lift a finger!” “Why, I am the Aether Foundation’s last line of defence!”  I frown at this comment, carefully scrutinising for any signs of particular competence, but he doesn’t seem to notice.  “What would become of the Foundation if something were to happen to me now?”  He tut-tuts her, then turns to me.  “You are a trial-goer aren’t you?  You’re a splendid trainer!  I’m deeply impressed!  I’d like to reward you by showing you something truly astounding.  Once you have finished your Grand Trial, come to Hano Grand Resort and I will take you to see a wondrous place.”  I accept his invitation with a shrug.  Can’t be any worse than whatever the Kahunas and the Guardians will want me to do next.

I continue along the path to the Ruins of Life, past a truly spectacular cliff side and up towards the ruins’ great stone gate.  Someone is standing in the path… a young woman… but as I get close, it becomes obvious that it’s not Olivia.  She has waist-length pink and yellow hair, black clothes, and… an unmistakeable Team Skull necklace, as well as the Team Skull logo tattooed in pink on her bare midriff.  Looks like I’m starting to attract all the wrong kinds of attention from these guys. I briefly consider trying to avoid her, but she’s clearly seen me first, and looks like she was waiting for me. “So…” she says, confidently strolling up to me.  “You’re the one Gladion was talking about?  Hmph.  You don’t look like anything special to me.” “Well… looks can be deceiving, right?”  I try to flash a confident grin back, but there’s something a tad unsettling about her. “…uh… is this about the Slowpoke, or…?” She looks me sternly in the eye. “I’m Plumeria.  I help keep Team Skull together.  I’m like a big sister to all those numskulls.”  Her expression softens a little.  “Look… you have realised what idiots all these guys are, right?” she asks. “Um. I- I guess?” I reply.  Obviously I have, but I’m a little taken aback by her frankness. “But… don’t you think some of those dummies are cute in their dumbness?  You know what I mean… right?”  Plumeria gives me a strange look that is somehow equal parts conspiratorial, teasing… and deadly threatening. “Um. No.  No!  I have no idea what you’re talking about!  What are you even implying here?  Who said anyone was cute?  Not me, that’s for sure.”  Plumeria glares at me coldly. “Is that so, punk?  Well, I gotta tell you – you picking on my cute, dumb brothers and sisters is really annoying me!”  She grabs a Pokéball and summons a Golbat.  Oh, thank Arceus, a problem I know how to deal with!  My Dartrix is a real champ in this fight, thanks to the affection bonuses we’re starting to accumulate; he dodges a Confuse Ray and an Air Cutter, and shakes off some nasty poison, to secure a win against the Golbat, and seriously injure the Salandit that Plumeria sends out in its place. Salandit finishes my Dartrix with Flame Burst, but its own weak physical defences leave it easy prey for my Trumbeak. Plumeria recalls her Pokémon, steps back, and looks me over for a second.  Even though I just beat her, her gaze is… still kind of chilling. “Hmph. You’re pretty strong,” she says. “I’ll give you that.  But mess with anyone in Team Skull again… in any way… and I’ll show you how serious I can get.” Without waiting for a response, she spins around on her heel and stalks off. “I’m not messing with anyone anywhere!” I call out after her.  “It’s not like I have a… a… a stupid ‘thing’ for one of your dumb little brothers.  Uh.  Or sisters.  Could be a sister; you don’t know me; you don’t know my life.  I mean, it- it’s not, because it’s no one, but- but you don’t know!”  Plumeria is long gone by this point, of course, but that’s no reason to let her get the last word.

Finally, I reach the entrance to the Ruins of Life, with Lillie suddenly right behind me, escorted by Professor Burnet.  Lillie is apparently here at Nebby’s behest, and doesn’t know much more than that.  Before I can interrogate either of them, though, Kahuna Olivia emerges from the ruins. She apologises for her earlier absence by explaining that Tapu Lele had summoned her to help “clean up” the ruins (wait… so the Kahunas have to do household chores for the guardian deities?  Okay, maybe I’m not really getting the short end of the stick after all). With minimal preliminaries, Olivia accepts my challenge… and promptly wrecks my $#!t.

I never intended my current team to be in any sense permanent – Raticate’s going to go at some point, probably Trumbeak too once I’ve finished exploring its evolution, and I’m not 100% on Pikachu or Slowpoke either – but even so, I have to admit it was a slight oversight to have three Pokémon with Rock weaknesses and none with a Rock resistance.

My Dartrix takes out Olivia’s first Pokémon, a Nosepass, without immense difficulty (though, again, a few affection bonuses help to seal the deal).  Then… in comes her partner Pokémon, Lycanroc, a creepy-looking red-and-white werewolf Pokémon that I can only assume is the evolved form of Rockruff.  Its powerful Rock Throw attack immediately knocks out my Dartrix and my Salandit, then as soon as I try to bring its defences down with Trumbeak’s Rock Smash, Olivia unleashes its Z-move: Continental Crush, which as far as I can tell is a move that works by dropping Australia on you. My poor Slowpoke flinches under Lycanroc’s Bite and doesn’t even get a chance to hit back with Scald.  Finally, my Raticate manages to bring it down with Crunch.  Enduring what would have been a finishing blow from Olivia’s final Pokémon, a Boldore, Raticate manages to do just enough damage before fainting to bring it within striking distance for my last Pokémon, Pikachu, to finish it off. 

Phew.  Okay.  Lesson learned.  No more underestimating Rock-types.  Especially weird, gangly werewolf Rock-types.

…what, you didn’t think I was actually going to lose that one, did you?  Listen, “wrecks my $#!t” is very much a relative term here.  Sure, it looked bad for a little while but I’m a former Champion (in multiple regions, if you count my… past lives, or… whatever… look, I try not to think about it too hard), and Olivia is, like, the head shaman of some backwards middle-of-nowhere hick island who does chores for a bird.  Of course I beat her; I’m amazing.  Give me some credit here.

Olivia rewards me with her Z-crystal – the Rockium-Z (did the Alolans listen to these names at all while they were picking them…?) – and sends me packing just as Hau arrives for his own Grand Trial. Hau has apparently received the same invitation from the Aether Foundation as I did, and is eager to get his trial out of the way so we can go and have a look.  Lillie is decidedly less enthusiastic, presumably since she knows the Aether Foundation is hot on her trail, and makes a stammering excuse. Well, whatever.  Sooner or later, Lillie… you can’t run forever.

Ridiculous quote log:

“Yo! I’m a herb seller!  I’m self-taught, but I sell good quality herbs!” Why does everyone in this region try to get me to do f#$%ing drugs!?

“There’s a faint smell of spices, sauces, and other fragrant things…” …okay maybe this is the time to admit that I… kiiiiiiinda have a thing for smelling other people’s beds?  Uh, I- I mean, it’s totally not a sex thing, not even a little bit; just, uh… if I come across someone’s bed, I like to… give it a good long sniff before I move past it.  Lots of people do it, probably.  It helps me feel closer to- wait, damn it, no, that still sounds weird.  That is, uh… I mean, if they wanted to sniff my bed I would totally let them, and- okay that sounds even worse.  Can we… just forget I said anything?

The team: 

Tane the Dartrix Male, Timid nature, Overgrow ability Level 28 Tackle, Razor Leaf, Astonish, Pluck 

Rhea the Trumbeak Female, Lax nature, Keen Eye ability Level 27 Pluck, Roost, Fury Attack, Rock Smash 

Ashley the Pikachu Female, Timid nature, Static ability Level 27 Volt Tackle, Hidden Power (Ice), Nasty Plot, Thunder Wave 

Hypatia the Slowpoke Female, Hardy nature, Own Tempo ability Level 27 Confusion, Yawn, Headbutt, Scald 

Soot the Raticate Female, Hardy nature, Hustle ability Level 27 Crunch, Tail Whip, Hyper Fang, Focus Energy 

Joanna the Salandit Female, Timid nature, Corrosion ability Level 27 Flame Burst, Sweet Scent, Dragon Rage, Smog

[hyperionwitch]

I got tagged by @nachtvater​!  Let’s GO

Name: Gillian/Hyperionwitch

Nickname: Gilly, Hype, GG, idk I have a lot of variations on these

Height: 5′1/2″

Hogwarts House: Ravenclaw

Last thing I googled: Centennial Bridge (looking to see if the bridge on my way home was closed)

Fictional character i’d like as a sibling: Oh lord, I dunno.  Uh...Iron Bull?  He seems like he’d be a fun brother to have.  Minus the Qun.

Favorite band/artist: lol I mostly just listen to movie/video game soundtracks or selected songs, so I’m not sure I have a favorite single band or artist.  Shrug!

When did I make this blog: Apparently in October of 2010, which seems unfathomably long ago.  Holy shit.

How many blogs do I follow: Around 320 blogs.  I’m not sure how many of those are still active, though.  I follow a lot of fashion/inspiration blogs and some of them have drifted off.  The rest are artists/fandom folks I like, quality memeing, and friends.

What do I post about: Art, video games, and memes?  Mostly the first two, probably.  Particularly related to Elder Scrolls, Dragon Age, Final Fantasy, and occasionally others.

Do you get asks on a regular basis: Not really.  I get more on my art blog, but even then it’s only once in a while.  It’s always nice when I do, though.

Aesthetics: Witchy things, plants (esp. succulents and herbs), loose drapey fabrics, cable knit cozy stuff, bottles and antiques, stars, deserts and forests, filigree and old gold/brass stuff, things that are fancy but old and worn.  I just like stuff, idk.  lol

I tag WHOEVER.  If this looks fun, please do it and consider yourself TAGGED.  Behold as I dodge the expectation to dodge people because I’m bad at it.