#and ty for looking into my intrests that means so much to me???

[madame-mongoose]

i finished watching the portal playthroughs and wheatley is so cute i canf get over him hes so silly AND GLADOS IS SO FUNNY i love them both. i understand now. theyre so. gshshgshd

IM GLAD YOU LIKED IT AAAA I was gonna draw you glados and wheatley now that im home but im too sleepy to do so, so have this instead

[kar1nsworldx]

Nerdy bloke ♡

pairing: ArthurTV x f!reader

Instagram!AU

SUMMARY: hard launching/soft launching(?) yours and Arthurs relationship - y/n used for reader as i thought it was stupid to just call her 'username' :)

requested: nope </3 but requests r opened for other youtubers (sidemen, chrismd, willne, calfreezy, etc.) as well for wolverine & deadpool PLEASE SEND REQUESTS

ˋ°•*⁀➷ 𝗠𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 🧸ྀི

ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩

arthurtv

liked by y/n l/n, georgeclarkeey and 52,632 others

arthurtv: 🏂

tagged: @y/n l/n @arthurtv @georgeclarkeey @chrismd @wroetoshaw

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COMMENTS;

user007: arthur is the kind of guy to tag himself in his own post

y/n l/n: yeah it's bc hes a weirdo

y/n l/n: arthur i hate you, kys

arthurtv: :(

us3r: LMAOOOOOO

wroetoshaw: outrages

userly: love to see this group together <3

user777: THE SECOND PIC OF Y/N FALLING???????

usermybeloved: the third pic of Y/N is so cute wtf?????

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y/n l/n

liked by miniminter, chrismd10 and 42,632 others

y/n l/n: almost died 2day because of these fuckers 🤦‍♀️

tagged: @arthurtv @georgeclarkeey @chrismd @wroetoshaw

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COMMENTS;

georgeclarkeey: we were so close to killing her lads, im sure we'll succeed next time

y/n l/n: fucking hate you clarke

chrismd10: did you really have to post the fifth picture???

y/n l/n: yes ofc xx

arthurtv: that first picture is really pretty, I wonder who photographed it?

y/n l/n: ah yes, my apologies mr.television, heres your photo creds for one single fucking picture 🤲 xx

arthurtv: ty darling

userxo: DARLING????

userumy: UMMMM EXCUSE ME 👀👀👀

wroetoshaw: you did not almost die calm down

y/n l/n: WTF DO YOU MEAN I DIDNT ALMOST DIE???? YOU AND ARTHUR ALMOST DROPPED ME IN THE 3RD PICTURE MATE

usermybeloved: HAAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAA

arthurtv: sorry doll x

y/n l/n: buy me hot chocolate and i'll forgive you

arthurtv: yes ma'am

xeuserxe: DOLL??? MA'AM????? SIR WHAT

user111: LMAOOOO SHE HAS HIM WRAPPED AROUND HER FINGER SJFBNCNF

freyanightingale: looking stunning girly xxx

y/n l/n: FREYA MY WIFE ILY!!!!!!

freyanightingale: ❣️❣️❣️

xeuserxe: whos that w you on the fourth photo??

y/n l/n: 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

xeuserxe: hmm...

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savinggracepod

liked by userly, y/n l/n and 15,672 others

savinggracepod: Can you guees who's on tomorrow's pod? 👀😘

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y/n l/n: can't wait to see!!

savinggracepod: cheeky x

userly: MISS @y/n l/n COME HERE

xeuserxe: AHHH cant wait!! Xxx

user007: ❣️❣️❣️

user777: this is going to be good!

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y/n l/n

liked by savinggracepod, userly and 21,652 others

y/n l/n: was my pleasure to be on the @savinggracepod!!! loved talking about crushes 🤭, social media and so much more! GO CHECK OUT THE PODCAST RNN!!!! new yt video coming out in 2 days xx

tagged: @savinggracepod

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COMMENTS;

savinggracepod: was a pleasure to have you!! xx

y/n l/n: 💌💌💌

usermybeloved: cant wait for the new vid! :)

arthurtv: your new vid is bomb, can confirm

y/n l/n: :)

xouserxo: what editing program do you use?

y/n l/n: final cut pro x :)

xouserxo: tysm!!!

user007: i'm intrested in who this crush is...

y/n l/n: 🤭🤭🤭

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y/n l/n

liked by arthurtv, zerkaa and 68,752 others

y/n l/n: @sabrinacarpenter i love you please marry me 💍 also photo creds to mr. television @arthurtv for the 5th pic x

tagged: @sabrinacarpenter @arthurtv @arthurnfhill @chrismd10 @georgeclarkeey

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COMMENTS;

arthurtv: can we get married if sabrina says no 💍?

y/n l/n: ya ofc xx

arthurtv: yay x

userly: OH?????

user777: WHAT

usermybeloved: DO YQLL SEE THIS!?!??!?!????

chrismd10: @arthurtv I better be your best man

georgeclarkeey: your obbsession with her is concerning

y/n l/n: "please please please" shut the fuck upppppp!!!! Xxx

georgeclarkey: rude :/

user007: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

us3r: y/n is an icon

behzingagram: you ditched a sidemen shooting for a concert.. great

y/n l/n: okay so maybe I wasnt sick... whoops! 🤷‍♀️ xxx I'll be there next week ♡

behzingagram: you better be you bitch

y/n l/n: oh shut up you fat prick

usermybeloved: LOVE THEM SJFNNCNCC

user111: 💀💀💀

arthurtv: thank you for the photo creds doll

y/n l/n: yea yea ur welcome xx

arthurtv: :)

us3r: 'DOLL' ?????????????

ooouserooo: ARE YOU GUYS TOGETHER OR SOMETHING?????

useredup: "mr. television" just say yall r togetger atp

y/n l/n: nuh uh

useredup: FUCK YOU MEAN NUH UH?????

chrismd10: you were so wasted after this lol

y/n l/n: literally was not idk what ur talking about 🙄

chrismd10: arthur literally had to carry you bridal style because you were falling every 2 minutes

y/n l/n: I just wanted to be carried stfu

arthurtv: next time just ask doll, you dont have to almost brake your neck for me to carry you

y/n l/n: ay bet 💪🤭

user505: NAH WHAT

userly: THIS IS INSANE???????????!????????

user007: EXCUSE ME???? SHE WAS CARRIED BRIDAL STYLE BY ARTHUR???? "DOLL"????? "I WANTED TO BE CARRIED"????????? I AM GOING INSANE WHAT THE FUCK???? THE EMONJI COMBO TOO????? AAAAAAAH

taliamar: looking good x

y/n l/n: says you! xxx

faithlouisak: fit

y/n l/n: ❣️❣️❣️

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y/n l/n

liked by arthurtv, stephen_tries and 72,637 others

y/n l/n: date night was a blast w this nerdy bloke <3

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COMMENTS;

arthurtv: did you enjoy yourself doll?

y/n l/n: oh most certantly mr. television

userly: EXCUSE ME WHAT

useredup: WHAT IS HAPPENING

user007: ARTHUR X Y/N DATING CONFIRMED??????????!??????????

user111: LITERALLY GOING INSANE AND FERAL IF THIS ISNT FUCKING ARTHUR AND Y/N TOGETHER IN THOSE PHOTOS I AM GOING TO MURDER SOMEBODY AND THEN MYSELF TOO WHAT THE FUCKKKKKK

y/n l/n: please don't murder somebody! or yourself! and if youre going feral pls check that you dont have rabbies!! xxx much love (:

user111: NOW IM GOING CRAZY BECAUSE YOU REPLIED TO HOLY MOTHERFUCKING FUCK AAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ksi: the flowers are pathetically cute

arthurtv: shut up

us3r: OH???????

usermybeloved: SCREAAAAMING

user505: ARTHUR THOSE FLOWERS BETTER BE FROM YOU

geenelly: cuties ♡♡♡

y/n l/n: says you! xx

bambinobecky: happines is a good luck on you girly! xxx

y/n l/n: stfu ur to kind 🫂🫂

chrismd10: about damn time

y/n l/n: oh shut up you inbred twat

taliamar: hope you guys enjoyed the resturant!

y/n l/n: YESSS we did!! double date soon? 👀🤭

taliamar: yess x

freyanightingale: the little bows are so cute 🎀

y/n l/n: RIGHT?????? ♡♡♡

user505: SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP DYING

georgeclarkeey: disgusting (said with love)

y/n l/n: literally die (said with love)

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y/n l/n & arthurtv

liked by vikkstagram, tobjizzle and 120,321 others

y/n l/n: IT IS FINALLY TIME!!!!!! NOT ONLY TO ANNOUNCE ARTHURS AND MINES RELATIONSHIP BUT TO ALSO SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARTHUR!!!!!!! Arthur, Arthur, Arthur, where to start? Well first of all I'd like to wish you a happy 28th birthday my love! I geniuenly hope you enjoyed it, that you liked all of the gifts and that you enjoyed your birthday with the people you love and who love you too! There are not enough words in the english language to describe how wonderful you are, and how much I love you. You're the kindest, most smartest and funniest person I know, with the goofiest smile and silliyest ideas too. The way you care for others and how you always try to include people and help everyone around you makes my love you even more. Arthur you're the Deadpool to my Wolverine, the Sun to my Moon, the fucking love of my life. I love you to fucking death Arthur. Thank you for everything you've given me, and once more I wish you a very very happy birthday my love.

tagged: @arthurtv

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COMMENTS;

arthurtv: Y/n youre making me cry and the guys are laughing this is not funny :( also i love you too ❤

y/n l/n: ❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️

tobjizzle: happy birthday man! 🫂 so happy for you guys 😇

ksi: happy bday 💪💪💪also congrats too

vikkstagram: 🌟🫂

stephen_tries: hes crying a river y/n

freyanightingale: AHHHHH YOU GUYS ARE SO SWEET!!!

wroetoshaw: atp that mans drink will become pure water with how much tears are falling into it

behzingagram: sap

y/n l/n: shut the fuck up

taliamar: 🫂🫂🫂

miniminter: happy for you guys, and happy birthday arthur!

bambinobecky: SO HAPPY FOR YOU GUYS AAA!!!! Happy birthday!

faithlouisak: 🫂🫂

geenelly: HDHCJCJCJC SO HAPPY!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARTHUR

arthurnfhill: y/n my shirt is soaking wet make the man stop crying

callux: did not expect to see arthur cry 😭

calfreezy: best couple in 2024??? 👀👀

y/n l/n: YESSIR

theburntchip: y/n get that man some tissues pls

user111: MOM AND DAD ARE FINALLY TOGETHER AAAAAAAA

user505: SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP DYING THIS IS REAL THIS IS ACTUALLY REAL

user777: HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARTHUR OHMYGOD

us3r: FIANALLY!!!!!!

useredup: YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!! HAPPY BDAY ARTHUR!!!!

usermybeloved: FUCK YEAAAAAH!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY 🗣🗣🗣

xeuserxe: HELL YEAAAAAAHHHHHHH BABY

xouserxo: ❣️❣️🫂🫂

user007: HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARTHUR!!! 🎉🎉🎉

user707: FUCK YEWAAAH!!!! ALSO THE COMMENTS SAYING THAT ARTHUR IS CRYING????? HDNDJCJJC I LIVE YALL HAPPY BDAY ARTHUR!!!!!

us3r: JDNFJCJC LOVE ALL THE SHIRTLESS PICS 😭😭😭😭

userly: DIDOWJCJDHCHHC THE FIRST PIC IS SO FUNNY TO ME JDNDJCJ HAPPY BDAY AND CONGRATS!!!!

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y/n l/n added to their story!

⤷ arthurtv liked y/n l/n's story! ♡

⤷ arthurtv: love you 2 (:

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[demonsword586]

Horn grinding headcanons! Niflheim

(I'm gonna be honest,this took way too long to write and I feel like I kinda missed the theme of this series with this work...I also feel like my writing was a bit off....I don't know how to feel about this one!)

Gusion

-bro paint those horns,it's impossible to find them

-he's already tired af and done with everything,so when you ask to grind on his horns....he just sighs

-he suddenly grabs you and puts you on his lap.He then puts his hand in your pants and starts using his long fingers on you while grabbing a pen with his free hand and going back to his math problems.

-He then tells you ''If you can survive a few hours of this maybe I'll let you use my horns''

-but a few hours for Gusion means a whole damn afternoon!

-That fucking tease is rubbing,pinching and fingering you with one hand while doing math with the other,looking absolutelly unfazed. Heck he's not even checking on you,even tho you're trembling in his lap after your 8 th orgasm.

-when the sun goes down so does his pen and he finally looks down at you. He gently cradles your body before throwing you on his bed

-you're still recovering from his previous torture,he's already pulling his tie off and tying your hands together with it.He lies his head on your lower stomach and looking up at you seducevlly

-you're in for a long night

Bathin

-Hmm....now he has an intresting horn.On one hand it looks pretty sharp but maybe it's just the angle...I bet the tips are actually smooth....the swirl also reminds me of a knife but I hope it's not like one....so this could either be painful or really enjoyable!

-Let's set the scene! You two are sitting on a comfy blanket on a field,moonlight shining on the two of you. As his head lays on your lap while he rambles on about a book he's reading,you stare at his very asteticlly shaped horn before getting a sudden horny idea.

-While he's talking,you sneak your hand from his hair to his horn,gently caressing it which get's a quick reaction out of him. He slowly stops talking mid sentence,his cheeks slowly turning a light shade of pink while he covers his mouth and looks away from you. ''My little star...you shoudn't touch someone's horn like this..it's very sensitive for us devils..'' he says with a meek voice,stopping a few times to cathch his breath.

-''Oh? You seem to like it tho. Maybe we could even use it for something more...intresting~'' You say in return,your voice lower then normal.

-With you touching one of his erogenous zones and suggesting something so perverted,outside even!.....let's just say he's not one to refuse you.

-The act in it's own is very sweet and fluffy. He does most of the work while also being carefull not to accidentally hurt you. He caresses your legs throughout it all. Just make sure to praise him and tell him how good you feel. He's pretty quiet,only making a few grunts and a slight whimper

-now imagine all of this but he's wearing a sailor moon costume

Andrealphus

-now I like this. Beautiful shape,rigged,long! That's what I want in a devil! Plus there's so much surfice and ways to grind on....

-Okay imagine that he finally comes home after being gone for days. When he returns he's all covered in blood,probably coming back from another massacre. As a good partner,you offer to help him bathe.

-Now you are running your hands through his long hair while he's soaking in the tub.As you are washing his hair,you notice his pretty horns and get an idea.

-You slide your hands down to his shoulders and softly whisper into his ear ''Andrealhus~ Can I borrow your horns please? I promise you'll enjoy it too.~''

-his breath hitches at your hot breath against his ear,he closes his eyes with a frown ''No...you'll get dirty with blood'' Now obviouslly he's just trying to make excuses! Why? Simply...he doesn't wish to hurt you. He knows how strong he is and since he spends most of his time hunting and torturing angels,he's afraid he might lose control and cause you pain.

-But you are not satisfied with that! You then slide one of your hands down his chest,softly caressing it and with the other one,you gently trace his horns ''But Andrealphus! You been gone for a week...you can't expect me to not be needy when you come back. Plus..I missed you so much! Please don't make me wait any longer~'' you whine sensually in his ear.

-Now you are really testing his limits. Screw all his morals! If you want it,you'll get it. Doesn't mean he'll be rough tho.

-As soon as he hears you pleading,he releases a long groan.He grabs your hips and gently places you in the water,right between his legs.

-Andreaplhus then starts gliding his fingers along your body. From your collarbone to your chest,down along your stomach and lower until he reaches your privates.

-When he touches your most sensitive area,which is now even more sensitive than normal cuz of your horniness,you get startled and yelp before jumping back on your feet.

-Your reaction suprises him a bit but then he smiles innocently and pulls you back near him.He grabs your leg and lifts it over his head. With his horn now between your thighs,pressed against you. With a husky voice he says ''Looks like you really did miss me. You're so sensitive today...let me guess,you been touching yourself a lot while I was out.''

-You whimper softly and nod before placing your hands on his other hrn and humping the one between your legs.

-he groans and gently holds on the flesh of your thighs,holding them firmlly enough to stop your movement. He then slowly bobs his head while making sure you stay in place

-Now you have this gigantic killing machine of a devil,melting under you,doing his best to be sweet and gentle with you while also melting uder your touch. His horns already slick with pre-milk.

-After a few minutes of soft passion,his movements start getting faster and sloppier,warning that he's close to climax.Seeing his blushing face,his quick breaths makes you feel your own orgasm approaching. You press yourself even closer to him which makes you cum first. Feeling your juices hit his horns and your knees tremble,he arrives as well,moaning your name with his soft voice

-imagine if he looked at you with that bloodthirsty smile in between the act

[turboautismrobot]

Hello! OK so I'm sorry if this is weird but I saw that post where you said "Anyone wants to hear me rant about Kokichi" I just wanted to say that, yes I want to hear lol

oh hi anon this is copy pasted from my notes app and i havent re read it in some weeks so excuse any weirdness lmao

ahem:

what the fuck does ultimate supreme leader even mean.

in drv3 the talents are at their most central to the plot, rantaro lies about his because he knows he'll be targeted for being the ultimate survivor of the previous game, maki lies about hers because she knows she wont be trusted with the title of ultimate assasin, part of shuichis character arc revolves around his insecurity over his ultimate detective talent, kibos comidic effect comes from him being an ultimate only in title, having his abilities as the ultimate robot be incredibly and sometimes even below average, we see the cast receive their talents at the start of the game, the fake narrative has them give their talents up in protest of the gofer project, the fiction plot twist places emphasis on their talents and struggles around them being scripted and used to dehumanize them into living fictional characters, there are whole talent labs for the students of the ultimate academy for gifted juveniles

even in previous games where the talents arent such big points theyre still pretty importaint, hajimes entire conflict coming from the fact that hes talentless and went trough so much societal pressure he accepted being lobotimized just to have something he can call special, nagito even poking fun at him for being from the reserve course

looking purely at antagonists nagitos shines with his talent, the ultimate lucky student title being given to him in a raffle to select a random talentless person to join the academy, tying into his inferiority complex. the title of ultimate luck also ties into the luck cycle that dictates and completly ruined his life, his luck is also used for plot reasons when he survives his plan to murder himself and gets twogami killed instead, when he gets a soundproof room in ch4 which alongside sonias is used to point out the holes in gundhams story, to obtain the hopes peak file trough russian roulette, and having its last hurrah when he literally kills himself in order to have his luck rat out the traitor

but kokichis talent is utterly meaningless, not only is "ultimate supreme leader" a random bundle of words made incomprehensible by the addition of the adjective "supreme", that doesnt tell you anything about him, but we also never see his supposed leading skills utilized in the narrative, only being TOLD by his motive video that hes the leader of a SMALL gang, making the adjective "supreme" not only meaningless but nonsensical. his talent is so incredibly underutilized in the game that for most of it i was convinced he was lying about it and would be revealed to be the ultimate prankster or theif or even liar because those are skills he actually uses during the game, which would have made him a massive fucking hypocrite for ratting maki out which imo would have added intrest to his character

its an incredibly odd choice to make kokichis talent meaningless in my opinion considering that for most of the game hes the main antagonist and conflic creator, unlike the previous antag nagito who uses his luck to his favor at every chance he gets, kokichi doesnt do shit with his own talent, its completly meaningless to the narrative of v3 which again, is the game that emphasis the talents the most in the entire series (dr2 has an emphasis on them but its only brought up by nagitos admiration of his classmates and at the end of the game with the izuru reveal, unlike v3 which is focusing on the talents the entire duration of the game)

[that-yandere-shit-archive]

Well hello 👋 it said that you will right for death note I was wondering if I could request a yandere Light Yagami x shy virgin reader can it be a oneshot ? can it also be nsfw

I don’t think I’ve gotten a death note request yet so this’ll be fun. Still in high school but after he found the death note.//

Warnings: yandere themes, nsfw, fem reader, manipulation he’s a bastard man what do you expect

Light Yagami was one of those kids in high school. You know the kind, hot and popular yet untouchable by those deemed lower than him. He’s never had a girlfriend so his rejected fan club started a rumor that he swung the other way, out of pure spite.

Regardless of the rumor you were intimidated by him. I mean someone that sought after, who also scored the best grades? Anyone with half an inch of common sense would avoid him at all costs. Who knows what his fan club could do to you should you show even the slightest bit of intrest in the guy.

So that’s what you did, kept you’re head down, kept quiet and out of everyone’s way. Maybe you conditioned yourself to be like this or maybe it was just you’re shyness. Regardless you knew better than to be seen with him, but did he know better than to be seen with some nobody like yourself? The current situation tells you no, no he did not.

Having stopped you in the halls, he had told you to meet him after class on the roof. Which you could only respond with a small nod, that he took with a satisfied smile. After that encounter his stupid fan club made the day a living hell for you. Going as far as to trip you every 10 minutes, one even poured her carbonated drink on you!

By the end of the day you were soaking wet and absolutely miserable. You didn’t want to have to deal with Mr Popularity, but if you didn’t at least give him the benefit of the doubt you’d feel guilty. So here you are in front of the door that leads to the roof, great.

Well better get this over with

Opening the door you step out into the sunlight. There stood Light in all his glory, leaning against the fencing of the roof. Awkwardly making your way towards him, he turns to face you. A polite and almost loving smile appears on his face when he sees you coming his way.

“I’m glad you decided to meet me here S/o. We have so much to talk about,” Light grabs your hands in his own.

“It’s, no big deal Light. Uhm, so why did you ask me to come here?” You softly pull your hands away and out of his own, and start to fiddle with them not really looking at Light.

His smile turns almost forced at the lack of your touch. “I’m in love with you. And if you just give me the chance to, I’ll make you so very happy.”

“L-love?! Light, we barely know each other! You couldn’t po-possibly be in love with me. I mean me? Out all the other girls who are so much more pretty and-” he grabs you by the shoulders and pulls you into a hug.

“But I do! You’re a goddess in this horrible currupted world, my goddess. And we can rule this world just the two of us, what do you say S/o? Be mine.” Light lilts you’re head up to capture your lips in a soft but demanding kiss. Pulling away he adds “and if you reject me I’m sure my stupid fan club will make your life worse then they did today. So you really have no choice in the matter.”

- - -

It’s been about a month since that day and since then the two of you have gone on multiple dates. Light has even protected you from his fan club multiple times and you’re actually starting to like him, he is attractive regardless of how intimidating he is. But how, how did you end up like this? Outside the Yagami household, holding Lights hand to keep calm as he turns the key.

“Light I’m not ready to meet your family maybe I could come over some other time?” You keep your eyes to the ground as your thumbs rub over the nails on your hands.

He looks up at you from tying his outside shoes. “You don’t have to worry about that, everyone should be out today. My sister Sayu will be hanging out with her friends until around dinner time, and mom went out for some groceries. So you have no reason to not come over,” he says in such a nonchalant way. As if he didn’t force me to accept his confession.

The hand holding yours tightens slightly to help calm you, as Light opens the door. Entering the house the two of you take off your shoes, Light then tugs at your hand leading you up the stairs.

Stopping at the first door by the stairs he turns to you with a smile, “My room.” A blush envelopes your face as he opens it. The two of you step in and you take a look around, it’s pretty average and almost minimalist. A desk in one corner, book shelves in the walls, and a bed and nightstand.

“Its nice,” speaking up and moving to look at Light’s collection of books, skimming your middle finger over the bindings.

Feeling arms wrap around your waist you stiffen at the sudden contact not used to Lights bold actions just yet. “I’m glad you think so,” his chin resting on your shoulder as he holds you close.

You shiver at the fact that his deep mellow voice is so close your your right ear. Light lets out a small hum and kisses your clothed shoulder.

“E-eh? Light?” He shushes you, one hand sliding down your arm to entwine his finger with yours, and the other wrapped around your waist effectively holding your body against his.

⚠️ spice starts⚠️

His lips travel up your shoulder to your exposed next. Kissing and sucking at the skin there his knee moves to open your legs from behind, your mouth falls open in shock. Letting go with a small pop Light stares at your neck and admires his handiwork of hickeys.

“Let’s move this to the bed shall we?” A wicked smirk creeps across Lights face as he gently flips and pushes you onto the bed so you face him. Light straddles your hips as he pulls off his tie and shirt, your face burns like an oven as you stare up at him.

He chuckles at your reaction, “So cute S/o. Do you want to touch me?” You shake your head no out of embarrassment and hide your face behind your hands. Blind from his actions, you feel one hand slide up the back of your thigh hitching your skirt up. While the other one slides underneath your shirt, his cold fingers digging into the side of your stomach. His hands move away from digging into you and start to unbutton the white uniform shirt you wear.

You feel Light shift above you and then cold air on your chest, your hands fly away from your blushing face and grab at his own to stop him. With a shit eating grin he purrs out “Are you shy S/o? There’s no need to be, you are a goddess, my goddess,” Light peppers kissss on your face moving downward towards your chest speaking in between the kisses. “Beautiful, wonderful, stunning, my love, my goddess.” He looks up from your chest and finishes with, “you are the beacon of hope in this dark dismal world.”

Nipping at the mound of your breast Light unclasps your bra with one hand and with the other unbuckles his belt. Sliding both your bra and shirt off. He lets his pants slide down and off his legs you’re face burns even hotter then before at the slight bulge in his underwear. Light grabs one of your hands and slides in down his chest and stomach stopping at the lining of his boxers.

Your hand freezes where Light left it as he slides your skirt off your legs. Both of you now only dressed in your underwear Lights eyes become lidded at the majority of your naked body.

Removing his boxers Light sat completely naked in front of you, he grabs your hand and presses his cock into the palm of it. “Move your hand,” doing as he asked you slide your fingers to hold it, trying your best to not hurt him.

“Mmm, good girl. Speed up.” Nodding you do so. “Hah....”

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Final Four!: The Lost Cargo of Kit Cloudkicker!

Hello You Happy People. SPIN IT! OHOHOHOHOHOHO LETS’ BEGIN IT!

After 10,000 years we’re finally at the motherducking Talespin episode! And only 8000 of those years were the last 14 months as Ducktales 2017 has been working toward this for a while with Cape Suzette being prominently mentioned in both the first episode and the season 1 finale, and Don Karnage being a regular part of the rouges gallery, voiced by the wonderous Jamie Camil. So this episode was less a matter of “If”, since Don’s presence meant Disney wasn’t really against it happening, and more a matter of “When and How.” The how, to a point was settled at the big NYCC panel for Ducktales that revealed Daisy and Goofy... as it also revealed aged up versions of Kit and Molly, meaning a proper tailspin episode was on the way.  I could not have been more pumped. While I didn’t remember the cartoon well, i’d always loved Talespin since I was a kid and as an adult my curosity only grew. Still need to watch way more of it mind you, I really have slept on most of the Disney Plus Libarary and that’s dumb of me, but what i’ve seen is impressive. The story of an irresponsible bear forced to work with a buisnesswoman bear after she buys his seaplane, his loveable kid sidekick and said buisness bear’s daughter whose cute as a button but suprisingly tolerable for a little kid character. Opposing them were masterful buisnessman Shere Kahn, who sadly does not show up here and could be friend , foe or neutral depending on the episode, and Don Karnage, a kooky sky pirate who as mentioned is already in this series and was Balloo’s arch enemy. The series was colorful, creative, had a great premise and cast and in general was just awesome and out of the Disney Afternoon shows is honestly my faviorite, though Darkwing is getting close. I even recently finally got the Shere Kahn funko, which is starring into my soul as I type this review! Hurrah! 

So I waited impatiently like I did for Daisy and Goofy, both also things I’d wanted in the series since the start. Thing was.. Goofy showed up in the second episode of the season, that was part of the premiere, and while the wait for Daisy was agonizing, she still showed up pretty early into the season at episode five. Gosalyn showed up at episode 12. This is episode  20.  

I do get it: This season was built to be the last just in case.. and ended up being the last so good job there. There was a LOT to wrap up in one season and on top of that they had a double and TRIPLE length episode taking up 5 episodes of the season, AND two holiday episodes. So that gave them only 18 normal episodes they had to place very carefully. So likely, given that they had some episodes important to the finale that couldn’t wait for the last minute in “The First Adventure” and “The Battle for Castle McDuck!”, as I highly doubt pepper was given such  a build up to not be important in the finale, still think she’s webby’s mom, we’ll see soon enough. And New Gods on the Block, while not as important was probably not swapped with this one because they wanted a lighter episode after three plot important episodes in a row, two of which are fairly intense and had lasting consequences and one of which, while a bit of a breather, was still indulging in the new FOWL status quo. This one ended up crammed into the last block.. because they likely really wanted to do this one, wanted it to tie into FOWL... and had nowhere else to put it, with Life and Crimes likely serving as one last break from FOWL, if it doesn’t end up tying into it, before the finale movie. Doesn’t make waiting forever for it any less grating, but hey it’s finally here. So how was it? Was it worth the hype? And how do the Wuzzles factor into this? Join me under the cut and spin it with me to find out and count down to 3!

So we open with an adult Kid Cloudkicker at work, voiced by Adam Pally!

If you haven’t heard of him, and one of my Patreons had not, he was on Happy Endings and the Mindy Project, and has a very distinct voice and is very funny, so it was a pleasant surprise to have him pop up here as Kit and given aforementioned roles were messes in some way shape or form, especially Max from happy endings whose essentially Oscar the Grouch, just as gay only not living in a trash can. Though if he had to he would. 

Since he was a kid KIt’s picked up the old family business, and is now running hire for hire.. and has also picked up his Dad’s old enemies as Don Karnage chases after Kit, his second greatest nemesis, who freely mocks him. It’s a lovely sequence but shows Kit isn’t the best pilot, and his fancy flying, while beating Don, also opens both crates, freeing the livestock he’s carrying.. and the other cargo, a mysterious stone that was in a F.O.W.L. crate that merges the chicken with  a goat, and scares kit, and he ends up causing his cargo to drop out of the plane.  Cue titles. 

Back with our heroes for this series, Della is recroding Dewey as he flies solo the first time!

That is so precious. Huey is along for the ride and is taking having his reckless brother with the attention span of a coked up ferret at the helm exactly how you’d expect. 

Of course his helmet says safety boy and of course he has a helmet on over his hat. Awww. Dewey, while good at it, he’s a 12 year old flying a rather sizeable plane with no difficulty that’s  pretty impressive.. he’s also Dewey so just flying a plane normally isn’t enough and he wants to Dewey it instead and do all the fancy stuff. He wants to be special as is usual for him, not realizing this is how you get to being good as his mom or Launchpad. And he’s 12 so that makes sense just on the basic level.. but it also makes sense on a comparison level: Dewey’s done a LOT of impressive stuff over the course of the series: rattling it off because why not, and this is just things he acomplished himself: he found the Lost Jewel of Atlantis (Getting it home was still a team effort but he is the one who identified it), is a golf pro better than his uncle whose played the game for centuries at this point,   defeated Don Karnage in a sword fight with little to no sword training, was crucial in beating Magica during the Shadow War, travled through time, by accident or not, consulted on a major motion picture, defeated a Gandra, even if she was going easy on him, BLIND, and biggest of all defeated the World Serpent Jormunngandr, by himself, a GOD that’s fought Scrooge evenly for decades. AND FINISHED HIM WITH A PILEDRIVER. To reitirate this was ONLY the stuff he did himself. So I get why he’d think just flying a plane when his mom and best friend have done so much more with it is boring and that being a pilot when two people he looks up to are already one is just.. boring. I’ts not special or unique and given his family name is built on the two, I can see why he’d chafe under this. 

Della for her part isn’t doing things wrong entirely, she wants him to start with the basics, the fact he can DO those basics at such a young age with minimal training shows he has a true knack for it, and it takes experince to pull off death defying stunts. The First Adventure backs this up as while Della was so talented as a kid she could land a plane herself.. that was all she did. And it’s still incredibly impressive a ten year old landed a seaplane with no real world training or hours in a full on flight simulator. The issue that’s never really adressed is while she’s mostly doing it right she dosen’t get that despite his talent, Dewey just dosen’t find this INTRESTING or get how impressive he is, and that dressing it up a bit migh’tve helped. It’s an understandable mistake though, teaching someone something in any context is hard. It’s one of many, MANY reasons like currently horribly hazzarodus conditions, long hours, having to buy their own suplies at times, that teachers are badly underpayed. 

Before we get into why their headed to Cape Suzette at long last, there is one notiacble absence in this episode I can’t really ignore: Launchpad. While he has been absent in every episode since Let’s Get Dangerous, not counting “How Santa Stole Christmas!” as the two holiday episodes were made to fit in anywhere story wise and timeline and production wise take place before the rest of Season 3 , which takes place during Spring given both the March note on Boyd and Huey’s photos in Astro BOYD, and Forbidden Fountain taking place during spring break. At most it’s currently running into Summer. I put too much thought into this with someone i’ve lost contact with. 

My point, I had one trust me, is that Launchpad has just been gone for the second half of the season . And up till now it wasn’t necesarily a bad thing: He was a major part of Let’s Get Dangerous and wasn’t really needed for any of the episodes so far: The Manor side of things in ImpossiBin was purposfully intense and while he would’ve had some thoughts on Beakly’s actions, it just worked better with him gone and the only other adult in the house at the moment busy doing other stuff for their protection till the climax. Split Sword was kid focused, New Gods didn’t really involve him at all, though I am sad he and Storkules never met as far as I can tell, The First Adventure was a flashback, Fight for CastleMcDuck was about the family unit more, and Beaks in the Shell is the only one so far I think he could’ve been included in at all and again shoving him in would’ve just cluttered things up. Like a lot of character ballance issues of the series, there’s a good enough reason.. this is just the one exception in the last batch I think would’ve been improved by having him. He’s Dewey’s best friend, he’s been there for him, he would’ve been a good counterpoint as a teacher and it could’ve been intersting having both he and della have constrasting styles but valuable things to teach and I would’ve loved to see him interact with Kit. It also just feels really weird to be down a pilot in the episode about the franchise about a pilot. \

The fact Dewey ends up crashing while landing after Huey applauds him on his safe normal landing, which ticks him off because he dosen’t want to be normal, hammers in it in a bit as he missed his buddy’s first crash. I get leaving him out as Kit is just as irresponsible and the episodes just as much about Kit if not more so as it is about Dewey, so I understand it but it dosne’t make it feel like any less of a lost opportunity. 

As for why their in the cape at last, it’s unsuprsingly another missing mystery, the stone of what is which can combine two things, the stone seen in the intro. Kit loosing it turns out to be a good thing as it meant FOWL didn’t get it, and they can find it, and are in town to find him. They pass the hire for hire offices which have a ton of notices on the door, and Dewey is entranced by the idea of cloud kicking, aka sky surfing, aka that thing kit did in the original. We also get to see updated versions of Baloo, Kit and Molly. Sadly no Rebecca. Can’t win em all. 

Our trio find Kit whose asleep, clearly having no customers and trying to pass it off like he does. It turns out he knows Della, as they went to flight school together, though she only vaugely remembers him at best. She does remember Molly though, wouldn’t be suprised if that’s another ex of hers either, and wonders what happen to her.. and not just because htere’s always room in Della’s harem.  Kit dodges.. and it’s likely in large part because it’s clear to anyone looking despite his statments he’s kinda stalled as an adult. It’s very clear from his surroudings, him being a pilot for hire, and him eagerly taking Dewey on as a sidekick when Dewey shows intresting in Cloud Kicking, that he’s trying to be Baloo. This idea was, according to Frank, the brainchild of the episode’s director, and one of it’s writers and storyboarders, Tanner Johnson. Tanner pitched “What if Kit never outgrew his Baloo fanboying?”. 

It’s an intresting idea: while it is sad we don’t get to see the old boy at any point and I do wonder where he is now and what he’s up to in his retirment, probably just flying about free as a bird would be my guess given how he never liked working to begin with, I applaud them for doing something unique with the Tailspin cast that fits into the themes of the season rather than just have them show up. By making it Kit instead of Baloo cargoing them, it gives us more of an arc to work with character wise as Kit has become so obessed with becoming his dad, he never stopped to consider if he was even good at it or enjoyed it.

  Using Della is part of what makes this work as she too grew up with a larger than life mentor and adopted dad.. but unlike Kit, she grew up a bit and saw the flaws in her dad. His greed, his selfishness, his tendency to hog the glory, his ego.. she stopped putting him on a pedestal. She still loves him, still wants his respect and admiration to this day, but she gets he’s not perfect and not who she wants to be.  Kit clearly never got this message. He never grew out of putting Baloo on a pedsteal and wanting ot literally be him instead of his own man. So he ignored the many flaws in how Baloo lived: Baloo started Talespin having lost his plane because he was so obessed with freedom and doing what he wanted, he didn’t bother actually paying on it and chafed under actually doing work half the time. He’s talented, fun to be around and a hell of pilot bar none, he honestly outclasses Della, but he was entirely irresponsible. Kit’s found himself in the same position Baloo was in: living alone, having not a lot going on, and on the verge of loosing his plane. Not only that he’s worse off because Baloo at least, while lazy, had enough talent. Kit.. isn’t a good pilot as we’ve seen and will see again, and clearly not only dosen’t have a knack for it, but is only doing it because Baloo did. He’s so obsessed with being who he THINKS baloo would want him to be, he never stopped to think that the actual Baloo would just want him to be happy and has probably told him this, or was probably too proud of what Kit was doing to realize what he was doing to his life. 

But Della dosen’t have time to get him a therapist, they need to find that stone before FOWL, and Kit offers to take them.. if they hire him. Della scoffs at this and insults the Sea Duck

Yeah Della your fantastic.. but you do NOT insult the Sea Duck and your very, VERY lucky it’s not Baloo you were dealing with as he would’ve turned you down out of principal. The Sea Duck is fucking awesome, and a national treasure. Thankfully Kit instead points out the Sunchaser isn’t in a better place after Dewey Dewed what he dew, so they really don’t have a choice. 

Della does draw the line at letting Kit fly as she eventually realizes he’s not good at this, mostly letting Crowby his crowbar do all the work, and finds he has a map to where he dropped the stone, so he dosen’t even have that leg to stand on and throws him out of his own cockpit before he gets them all killed. Okay that time on her side. Kit takes this time to try and train Dewey on cloudkicking... but despite being encaustic at the idea of it the reality leaves Dewford scared shitless.. and doubles up on bad things as Don Karnage and his crew are closing in on the island. FOWL hired them to get it for them, though why FOWL didn’t do so themselves I don’t know. Don’t get me wrong i’m happy to have Jamie back and it really wouldn’t feel right ot have a Tailspin ep without Don Karnage, I just find it odd Bradford would hire outside contractors for this given he has a full staff and not at least send Heron or Steelbeak along to supervise.  Regardless, Don puts pleasure before buisness spotting Kit.. and fully commits after finding out Dewey is ALSO involved. I also find it hilarous DEWEY outranks Kit on Don Karnage’s enemy list. So naturally he goes after him, int he personal plane he used in the series which also showed up in the cold open, and with Dewey not having the skill to take Don on, Kit is forced ot step in. He also calls him “Little briches” which while another sign of how much he wants to be his own dad.. is still too awesome not to apricate. Don cuts the line but thanks to Kit’s fancy footwork, they make it out alive and wash up on an island. Della soon joins them, thanks kit for saving her kid then rightfully slaps him for putting him in danger in the first place. Dewey also has to stop her from punching him when he explains he had no idea the stone ended up on this island, which granted she is justified in but Dewey , of all people, rightly saw this means they don’t have to drag a  unconcious bear around who probably hasn’t showered in a while. I mean the smell will be there either way but there’s less chance of accidnetlly inhaling too much while he’s conconcious. They also find out what the Stone’s been doing: combining the wildlife leading to rhino monkey hybrid trying to murder them. So at the last minute Frank also squeezed in another disney aftenroon show but one tha’ts not streaming and most don’t care about: the wuzzles, a bunch of hybrids of various animals... Frank couldn’t do much with that as is and just decided to rightfully play it for horror. 

Our heroes find Don, whose found the stone.. and is simply throwing most of hi crew  at it rather than doing anything productive, with them turning into just.. utterly horrifying combinations. Hands for heads and everything, bug legs, a non-anthro parrot head. it’s pretty tough to watch and I question why the episode did this as Don’s crew did not deserve this and this episode is mostly lightearted before and after this. A tailspin tribute episode episode should not pair well with the song no spill blood.. seroiusly you paid for all I do is win, and rightfully but you couldn’t get this?

Regardless the kids and manchild are told to stay put while the slightly more functional womanchild takes care of Don. Dewey and Kit naturally don’t, which is fair: what did della expect, the sugared up rabbit in a small duck’s body and the incompitent but charming manchild she’s insulted repedadtly to listen? Naturally they both beef it as Dewey can’t board and while Kit does get Don’s plane, he ends up crashing it instead of doing anything productive. I mean even Launchpad would’ve at least got back to the seaduck.. he would’ve crashed into it but still. Look when you make Launchpad look compietnet you really need to rethink your life.  Della has bigger problems though as it turns out the thing they were on.. was a coocoon.. for a butterbear. Oh no. Thankfully this goes better than you’d expect as she’s able to ride the thing and it tangles up some rope, taking the stone of what was with it and Don takes off after it with what pirates he has left. 

Our remaining heros return to the Sea Duck. Dewey and Kit plan to do the same thing again and expect diffrent results but Huey.. has some words for them. 

He’s fed up with this and points out they need to swap jobs. Dewey CAN fly, and Kit really is good at cloudkicking, it’s in the name, and he needs to return to it. While Dewey balks again stating anyone can be a pilot.. Kit finally admits that’s not true and he’s just not good at it and Huey finally snaps them out o fthier neurosis, Kit a bit late but better late than never given the state of his life, and points out the episode’s aseop: YOU make something special just by doing what you like to do and are good at well. I’ts been hard making these reviews, but I feel i’m getting the hang at it and it’s what I was meant to do, I just had to find it. It’s not always easy to find your calling but when you got it, go for it instead of some version of you you think you should be.  So we get pured distilled awesome for the climax. Besides Della again riding a bear that’s also a butterfly, Kit, also a bear I did not miss that gag, proceeds to finally spin it and begin again it as he tears through them with Crowby and easily deispatches the planes finally earning Della’s respect and finally back in his element, using his newfound size and strength combined with his still inherent acrobatics to easily take them out and land on Carnage’s plane and beat him. 

So the day is saved: The stone lands on the plane and our heroes properly secure it. Della releases her bear fly but it’ll find it’s way home i’m sure... so majestic. Or it’ll eat all the world’s seagulls. Good news either way. 

Back at the bay Kit packs up the stone safetly and gives them the bill. Which Della grumbles at but whiel he didn’t fly he did save their asses.. after endagenring them but still and does have a buisness to run. Plus he has to save his plane. 

But it turns out someone’s already bought it. And you can probably guess who. 

No not you sweetie.. though he is an investor for the person who DID buy it: Molly, whose taken being danger woman from a 4 year old’s play time to her career running an air stunt show. This is the other thing that cemented the whole aged up versions of these guys working for me: HIstory Repeating itself. Once again an enterprising young woman with a lot of ideas has bought the seaduck from it’s incompitent owner and hires the former owner to work for her.  But things are warmer this time: Kit wasn’t happy doing what he was doing, and it’s clear unlike Rebecca, who just bought the first plane she could get and hired baloo because he was who she could afford, they became friends with time and patience if not more but that’s still vauge... Molly did this out of love. She knew Kit was struggling and probably has as many fond memories of the sea duck and baloo as he does and didn’t want someone else to get the old girl. Her air show seems to be going fine, she apparently has a full crew, fans and enough money to purchase another plane on a whim from the bank to expand the show.. she wanted her old plane back and her old brother back. And wheras again Rebecca offered Baloo the job because he wanted to keep his baby safe from some half assed pilot she could afford and she knew it and thus could manipulate him with that. Plus he worked cheap so there. Here Molly just admires her brothers skills and hires them on it and he’s frankly more comfortable being a sidekick than the main star anyway. 

He TRIES to brush it off but gladly accepts. God another possible spinoff.. please make this Disney.. and if not at least Reboot tailspin I miss it. Still it’s a very satisfying ending. But what of Don Karnage? Well he’s lost everything as a result of this, unable to get back to his carrier, his crew mostly gone, and FOWL sure to be gunning for him. This is seemingly the end for him.. until he finds a chunk of the stone. “Or the start of an encore”. Wether this was a setup for a possible part of season 4, a possible spinoff or is going to come back in the finale.. we’re just going to have to wait and see won’t we?

Final Thoughts: I really liked this one. It’s not the best of the season: Kit’s arc is kinda telegraphed and Dewey’s arc while intresting isn’t focused on enough to really be that engaging. But the ideas at the core are solid and fit into the series well, the idea to age up our kid heroes from Talespin was really clever and paid off and as usual Adam Pally is a delight and as I said at the top was pitch perfect casting. Couldn’t figure out who played molly and the credits cut out on me, so let mek now if you do but yeah I enjoyed this one> It wasn’t the series at it’s best but given the last two are liable to get pretty intense it was a nice breezy break. And it got me wanting to watch Talespin again and there’s nothing bad about that. 

NEXT WEEK: In our penultimate adventure, Ducktales reinacts that one episode of Batman the Animated Series where all of Batman’s foes put him on Trial, as Scrooge’s Rogues put him on trial with Doofus as prosecuter and Louie for the defense. Well at least it’s not Lionel Hutz. 

This Week: Lots of Ducks! The lena retrospective continues as we take a detour for some comix, and we begin the Della arc as we go back to the start. It’s finally time to talk about Woo-Ooo!. 

If any of this sounds appealing follow my blog for more. If you like these reviews head over to my patreon, patreon.com/popculturebuffet, and become a patreon. At the 5 dollar level you get a review a month and even a dollar helps get to my stretch goals. I’m up to 15 a month so 20 is next and that means a darkwing duck review every month! And if you really like Talespin like I do, 25 nets you a tailspin review a month and a review of the pilot. Ohohohohohohoo. See you at the next rainbow. 

[antigoneidk]

Idea: (Stockholm Syndrome) y/n is peter’s enemy (you are dr octopus daughter) and Peter kidnaps you, you fall for him, smut in his spidermansuit, tying y/n’s hands with spiderweb, you have kink for spiders, Thank you! You are such a talented writer!! Love from Sweden

Confused|p.p.

a/n: thank you so much for your request your kind words and you patience...I'm so bad at being on time❤

this is my first time writing for peter parker × reader so excuse any mistakes

warnings: mentions of sex, smut, language

_

"I want him dead y/n. Do you understand that?" the man sitting on his chair looked at you, his eyes scanning every inch of your body before turning his back at you.

"Yes sir" you sounded determined, sure that you won't let your boss down like others did in the past. You knew you had the power to do everything, your dad made sure of it. And after all this was a battle you wanted for years, a battle against your worst enemy, Spiderman.

"Don't disappoint me. Now get the fuck out of here" you rolled your eyes at his fast mood swing and did as he said. You walked around the building preparing yourself for the big day. Everything was planned, even the smallest detail cause you needed him dead more than ever, to see him suffer, cry and beg for his life, just like your father did in his hands. Your lust for revenge was getting bigger and bigger though out the years and finally you had the chance to end this in your own way.

_

"What do mean he is not coming today? We had a deal" a man of yours shouted loud just so some of the Avengers on the other side could hear him. The man you were intrested in wasn't with them, but you had a feeling that he was just hiding somewhere. You held your guns in both of your hands tighter and kept hiding in your spot waiting for your team's signal and looking around in case you might see him. You huffed slightly annoyed that you had to wait. You had a vision of yourself just shooting at their heads laughing at them, and you only knew how bad your heart desired this vision to become true.

"I mean he is not coming. I don't have time to explain so just give me what I want and we'll leave in peace" You heard Tony Stark's voice and your heart started beating from anger as you felt your blood boiling and running inside your veins.

"No,if the kid is not here I'm not giving you anything" your disappointment started building up the moment those words came to your ears. You had to kill him today and you were sure he was here with the others but waited for you to make an appearance.

"Look I am not in a mood for fighting now" the Black Widow started walking towards your people"Give it to us now"

"I knew that you were here with them" you heard a voice behind your back and you turned only to find what you were looking for. You aimed at him but he was to quick to shoot with his webs and tie you against the wall. You smirked at him still holding your gun in the palm of your hand and slowly trying to hold it better.

"You think you can stop me with this?"you asked.

"I think I just did" his sarcastic tone made your veins to pop up in your head, turning to a really deep red.

"You fucking piece of shit" you screamed and fired at him, the noise interrupting the others too. Peter jumped trying to avoid your bullets, but his webs made it harder for you to follow him and even though you tried to break them, you couldn't. The last thing you remembered was his face right above you looking down at you smiling.

_

You opened your eyes looking around at the unknown place you were. Your body was laid at a big bed with big pillows around and blankets, all of them white. Plus the light coming from the windows all over the wall next to you made your eyes burn. You located the door across the bed and ran towards it, pulling and pushing in an attempt to open it but of course it was locked.

You huffed and placed your forehead to the door cursing everyone of your team and first of all yourself for letting Peter win so easily. You felt stupid and useless for a moment, feeling the need to cry from the frustration and the awareness that you had failed your mission in the most idiotic way.

"How was your sleep?"you jumped right in your place and turned to the corner of the room where Peter was standing with his hands crossed in his chest leaning against the wall.

"Where am I?"

"Somewhere safe don't worry about it"he said scanning you from head to toe.

"So when am I leaving?"

"You just came and you already want to leave?" he started to approach you with his eyes locked in yours. "We're having fun"

"You are the only one" you stepped to the side making your way to the huge window looking at the view outside, where the weather was cloudy and the wind blowing away, forcing the trees to move in its rhythm.

"If you're a good girl, I can promise you that you're gonna have fun too" you held your breath the moment his fingers touched your shoulder electrifying your entire body, yet you pulled your self away, disguised by his words.

"Can you just leave me alone? You're having me here trapped and you want me to be a good girl?" you moved your fingers at your last two words."If you want me to be good do me a favor and go kill yourself"

"No I'm gonna let you do it"

You jumped at him with your fists punching him in every place of his body you had access to, suprising him for a little with your unexpected moves and strength you had.

"You are the reason my dad is dead" "I want to kill you" "I want you to suffer" "I hate you".Those were mostly the phrases your mouth couldn't stop screaming at him with anger, bitterness, pain as long as you kept smashing him.

"Stop" he defended himself against you by throwing you with as much power as possible on the other side, with your head and back hitting the wall and every single bone inside you cracking. You moaned at the pain and you grabbed the back of your head, still looking at Peter kneeling down and analyzing your injury.

"Don't touch me"you backed off when you saw his hand trying to touch your head and you closed your eyes begging him to leave you alone and muttering words that didn't made sense. You heard his footsteps as he approached the door and finally leaving you in peace. You huffed leaning against the wall suffering from the pain he caused you and thinking of a plan to get out of a place you had no idea where it was located.

_

The past couple of weeks had you confused, first of all with yourself. Peter from the day of the accident had tried in so many ways to talk to you, make you feel better. At first you couldn't even look at him or listen to his voice. You couldn't resist your nature to attack him again and again with all of your powers, you even tried to trap him somehow so that you can escape, but nothing came out.

All of the sudden your anger fade away, sympathy took its place as you were listening to him, his stories, his jokes, his problems. Somehow Peter made you softer, a side of you came to the surface that you didn't even know it existed, it showed only when he was around you.

You tried to fight that feeling, convinced that it was something in the meals they served you that brainwashed you and changed your emotions. You got to the point of not eating for days, detoxing yourself from substance he might had put into the food. Yet, your point of view was unstable. You started questioning yourself if this was really you or not. If this was the start of something evil that was building up inside you slowly or if this was the start of something new, a weird experience.

"Y/n? Are you even listening to me?" he joked and you looked at your hands embarrassed.

"I'm sorry I-I zoned out. How was your practice?"you asked looking at him and mostly his suit that embraced his body perfectly, toning every muscle of his.

"It was good" he sat next to you while you turned to look outside your window for the hundredth time this day."What did you do?"

"The same as usual, trying to find a way to escape from here?"

"Did you came up with something?"

"Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"he raised his eyebrows and pressed his lips together with his brown eyes burning your entire soul.

"Why are torturing me like this? What did you do to me? I can't recognize myself anymore" you stand up running your fingers through your hair and starting to walk up and down the room which felt like prison.

"I can't understand you y/n. What do you mean?"

"I'm going crazy okay?"you yelled. "I am losing my mind and it's all your fault. You have me between these four walls for I can't even count how long, poisoning me and turning me to someone I don't like. Did you know that I can't think of you dying in my hands anymore? That my anger has completely disappeared? That I somehow started to like you as a person? I know you are behind this so please I'm begging you to leave me alone and let me find my sanity again. I'm so confused right now" you walked around the bed like a maniac, gasping for fresh air and having Peter in shock just following your movements silent.

"Say something for fucks sake you idiot" you slapped his face harder that you thought and the sound that came to your ears was nothing but heartbreaking to you. In a matter of seconds you felt your back hitting the cold wall and your hands tied up on the top of you with webs.

"Whatat the hell Peter?"

"Just shut it okay?"you wanted to feel terror from him but the only thing that ran through your mind was how fast his mood changed and how attractive looked to you seeing him being angry for the first time."I have no idea what is into you but I can't allow you to hit me like that y/n okay? I'm trying to make it less harder for you but you are not helping. You think that this was my idea? I didn't even knew that you existed till the last few weeks. And now you're saying that I am poisoning you and turning you to someone new? This is crazy"

"But what can I believe Peter? What would you believe if you were in my shoes?"

"Honestly I don't know" he leaned with his one hand to the wall looking at you.

"Why am I here?" he raised his shoulders and ran his fingers through his curls with his head turning to the side showing off his jaw."I'm sorry for hitting you"

"You have a heavy hand"you both started laughing, till you titled your head backwards and looked at your hands tied up."You have to wait for two hours"

"What?"you opened your eyes shocked and looked at him with opened mouth."What am I supposed to do for two hours? Can you find something with a sharp end to cut it off? I can't stay like these for two hours"

"No I can't. But I can keep you busy if you want to"he smirked at you checking you from head to toe. You bit your lip for a moment thinking of what he would do to you, yet you pushed those thoughts to the side. "I'd rather stay like this for days"

"I don't believe that" he licked his lips coming closer to you. "We can have a great time you know, just the two of us, all alone" his fingers touched the side of your face and slowly moved down to your neck giving you goosebumps and turning you on. Your eyes on his, you noticed how swift they changed into a darker shade and how both started breathing heavier. "Let me make up for everything" he responded to you leaning forward to your neck, giving kisses all over it. You held your breath at his touch and closed your eyes enjoying the sensation of his mouth finding your sweet spot and attacking it. His hands found their way to your waist pulling you near his body and pressing the skin down there with his fingers. On the other hand, you pressed your nails on the inside of your palms, imagining it was Peter's hair you ran your fingers into.

He moved lower to your collarbones biting the skin there as his right hand unclipped your bra and met your breast, rubbing your sensitive nipple there at a slow tempo, his suit offering you a new kind of satisfaction. You let out a silent moan, biting your lips with your teeth fighting the need to scream his name due to pleasure he was giving you. "Like that huh?" he mumbled while looking at you and placing his hand to your other nipple playfully, having you begging him for more than that. You tried to cross one of your legs around him but he was too quick to keep it down, pinching your nipple as a punishment, still taking your breath away and getting your knees weaker, making it hard for you to stay on your feet. "Fuck" you cried out closing your eyes once more, needy for his touch and mostly for his lips against yours. But instead he left wet kisses to your chest and slowly began to getting lower and lower, teasing you every now and then with his hands at the same time you felt soaking down there more than ever with his actions.

Peter knelt down smirking at you, his brown eyes focusing on yours and his hands getting lower little by little, with your anticipation rising.

You didn't knew exactly how to feel. He was your enemy, the person you hated the most, the man that killed your own father, the kid that took everything you had in this world. Peter was the one that your heart desired to have him dead in front of you.

Now? You had him on his knees ready to send you in places you had never been before, fascinated by you and your beauty. And even though you knew that he could never 'make up for' what he done in the past or for what happened days before, you didn't say a word to stop him, on the contrary you needed to feel him, get his taste.

You felt his hands pulling down your panties and underwear, exposing your delicate area to the cold air and his sight. You felt your cheeks heating up as your breath had stuck in your lungs at the moment Peter ran his fingers to your thighs and began to sucking leaving bruises and teasing the hell out of you.

"Damn I wish I had you like this sooner" he commented with a gruff voice, sending shivers down your spine.

"I'm gonna hit you in the throat"

You gasped for air exactly when his tongue reached your clit without any warnings, your nails leaving marks on your palms while he slipped two fingers into you, moving them in and out your heat. You arched your back despaired, being all over the moon. He grabbed your legs, in an effort to keep them open for him as he enjoyed watching your frail body accepting his touch in a way he didn't expect to and hearing you whispering his name with a breathy voice.

It didn't take much time to clinch around his fingers and cum into his mouth, your chest moving up and down and your knees not being able to keep you straight. Peter sucked the last drop of you before getting back on his feet again facing you with a huge smile on his face.

"I can keep doing this all day and night y/n"

[arkus-rhapsode]

Fairy Tail 100 Years Quest Chapter 12 Review

Oh my god... What the heck is even going on?

So our cover page is Natsu and Lucy, and Natsu I hope you enjoy that brain freeze.

So we open on Jellal confronting Touka. We learn like how Avatar was devoted to black magic there was a group devoted to white magic. Now this is cool, but literally if you watch the anime recently, that arc was done in 5 episodes. So this feels really odd on how much effort is being put into it.

Like if there was like something tying into Tenrou or hell edolas, that make more sense, given all thee time on it.

So Jellal describes White magic as a philosophy of nothingness, which that doesn’t make sense. Fans of yugioh gx might compare this the darkness and light in that series and how darkness led to creation while light was subjugation. But Black magic is clearly about ending life or manipulating life. I guess you could dumb it down to all life, but literal Ankherseram black magic is portrayed as nothing but death. So wouldn’t white be about life? I guess nothingness as life without personality isn’t wrong,  but this feels like a stretch.

Also, Mashima said anyone could learn any type of magic. So why is that an abnormality? Like if this was Black Clover where you are assigned a single affinity that be one thing.

Suddenly Laxus steps in, and want to make this clear. I don’t exactly hate the idea behind this. That Laxus wants to defend someonew ho is a part of his family, given his new found view on FT, and its using the family aspect of FT on its head. Someone bad could be using FT’s family mentality for personal benefit. Which is interesting.

Okay, well Jellal has a reason, she is  suspect and as a guild master he has authority to take her in. However, Laxus you of all people know that people in your guild will still harm it.

On the one hand im torn, the shounen loving half of my brain wants to see this fight. But the logical half says that these two are mature adults with enough common sense to take this to the run knights. And confrontation is over after this page.

Yeah for a chapter named after the two, its got very little to do with theem. Instead.... The worst thing in the chapter happens. We cut to Diablos’ ship and we see this.

Yes you are seeing this right. For people who were saying I was to harsh, calling this a submissive Erza fetish that Mashima is putting out, I ask you read this chapter.

You know I can’t tell if Skullion means this is temporary as in terms of magic, or temporary as Kyria will grow bored, but I do know that this is nothing but sick and tastess. Also props to Madmorel for having some class to be disgusted by the perv in the group. Like that is becoming a rarity these days.

We are guided down to the lower deck where natsu and wendy are being held, the motion sickness keeping them in check.

I’ve been putting this off long enough, its time to rant. This is bull shit. People told me, i was too harsh on mashima, but at the least I thought this was some sort of temporary thing that was meant so Kyria could get a win in a fight, but this might be some permanent magic effect feels disgusting.

Now, people say that this happened cause people would rag on Erza, called Erza fights awful, and that now Mashima is going in the complete opposite dirction. You didn’t like strong erza, fine! Here’s weak Erza, you happy cynics?

But that’s not the case. People didn’t like Erza because she was “too strong” she was someoone who went from this amazing badass female character, to this static friendship speech spewing tool that never truly got any development. Its painful for people to see a character like Erza not grow after she had developed so much in ToH, but it just was never followed through. All the times she won just felt like a poor spectacle without any character behind it.

Now you could say an erza who needs to get her strength back could be character development. No. Cutting away a person’s strength with “magic” is not character development, its forced regression. Its the author literally creating an unrealistic situation bcause he has no idea what to do with her  after ToH, hell he can’t even fully commit to a love story between her and jellal.

When Erza came onto the scene, she was cool, in control, yet could over react at times. To see her be pushed to her lowest by ToH and then recover and face midnight in OS, is peak Erza character shining through. That this is how erza’s development deserved to be treated. But Watching Erza crawl on the ground, be spanked, and cry for mercy like a hentai doll, all because of plot convince magic is so gross to me. Its ejecting the Erza that we all love and stripping her of all that personality just for this.

So if you blame this development on people who were too hard on Mashima about how he was writing Erza, I, a critic and very judgemental person, find this worse than any of the nakama power or skimpy armors.

Erza being trapped in Kyoka’s sex dungeon was bad, but you know what, EErza actievly resisted it. She didn’t want to be there aand tried to fight back. It wasn’t handled well, but that t least felt like whatt her character would do in this situation. But this was forced upon her and this is nothing more than an Erza made for this arc.

Also, lets step out of this and look at this from the meta perspective that this is also extremely lazy. In Eden’s zero there’s a villain who is all about subjugating women right now, and Mashima couldn’t be bothered to not let that bleeed into his other work. If that doesn’t scream creately lazy, than I don’t know what will. Also that frog thing in Eden’s zero is actuaally better giveen the fact he’s not mind bending away personality, he’s forcibly turning them in statues to do with what he pleases against their will.

Im not saying this cause im anti ecchi or that im anti  mashima, im anti such a hack story writting device that weather you stuck it out as a fan of erza’s till the end of FT or liked her at first but than soured on her, I ask, would you tolerate this? I’m not claiming ownership of the character of Erza, but I am asking do you think that this is worth a character arc because our author couldn’t think of anything better to do with her. You know if you knew Erza was so strong,Ad that in actuality she would sweep away most threats, why did you bring her? I honestly would’ve preferred Jellal and Erza being out of the action cause they had a kid or something. Erza having to pick between biological family and her guild family seems like a better direction to take her character in than this.

To see Erza cry because someone’s magic made her into a slave is so lacking in power than say the sheer emotional weight of watching simon die. Like this is shit is just awful.

We cut to Luccy and here is where I get to credit thee art. Sure Lucy is in a bikini, but what matters in frame is the wounds on her legs. Which is a nice us of having aa skimpy dress and not sexualizing it.

We get a flashback of Lucy realizing Kyriaa took her friends and this is where I give Caramille a big fuck you. Oh sure, this did happen after they showed up, but Diabolos clearly was going to find the place eventually and more importantly, you did fuck all. Like, go screw cause you have contributed literally nothing.

We find out that there is another ship in the area and that Gray is okay because he was saved by you can guess who...

Okay on the one hand, this definitely seems like Brandish’s kind of entrance, but on the other. Fuck you, Hiro. Like she just passed by and saved Gray? Hw? The entire ocean was either freezing or evaporating, what is your range? Also, who is in charge of Alverez? Yajeel? Oi...

Post Chapter Follow up: Its easy to say why I don’t like this chapter. I feel so sick by the sheer amount of laziness and disgust in the slave Erza plot. Like, my god this is so wrong. Not because of the subject, human slavery makes sense in a series aimed at teenagers, but the sheer disrespect that Hiro treated this character, made my blood boil. At the very least in Alvarez, Erza still seemed like she was the same character from beginning of the series.

People who follow me weekly on this review series are probably going to ask when I will stop harping on this Erza thing. Well each week, it  somehow get worse and more gross.  First time it felt like a cheap win, second it was bad use of domination, now this is full blown fetish material.

As for the brandish thing, I know why she is here, Lucy is literally not strong enough to handle 3 DE’s by herself with a few exceeds, and I’d accept that Brandish reentering the series. But maybe leave out Gray? I guess you could say that this is a subversion of the Musica captured by Doryu, but this feels lazier. You could’ve just made this a big “step up Lucy plot,” but no, had to save Gray, even though Skullion should’ve notice when his magic didn’t actually ash up Gray. Plus think about, if they save save Natsu and Wendy this arc and beat these three dragon eaters, wouldn’t some added bit of tension to the quest be finding diablos’s hideout and saving Gray from the “dinner table?”And I was cool with the kidnapped gray thing, but no, we had to have kidnapped everyone else.Also if he was made small how did he survive the water? Like he’s the size of a pin, he’d drown.

Now the stuff with Laxus and Jellal is actually fairly good Its an interesting take on FTs standards vs the consequences of their past when we are suppose to be rooting for Touka to be extracted. And involving two characters that really have been in the moral gray spectrum make them the most qualified for this subject matter. While i definitely didn’t like the Touka plot at first from how disconnected it was from everything (and it really is kinda shoed in on this point) it still is the more interesting plot. It has more intresting ideas than, “more dragons” and is involving the characters that come off as the most interesting.

Final Verdict: 3/10

There is clearly some interesting idea at work here

However, the way the plotline for the dragon portion of this arc has become a mess

I don’t use this phrase lightly, “Erza literally deserves better than this”

Plot convince playhouse at its finest

[mrsbakugo1]

The man with the crazy parts pt. 2

Doctor: Well....

Mom: THERE IS RIGHT!? THERE HAS TO BE!

Doctor: There is one way who's that kids father?

Mom: he dosen't have a father....

Leo: YES I DO! MOMMY STOP LYING ! MY DAD'S NAME IS RICHARD WANNABE!

Mom: stop talking like that abt ur dad...i knew i should've picked to live with my daughter than you...

Leo: w-what are u saying mom...?

Leo: U would rather be with that brat than ur best son ever!?

Doctor: HEY YOU TWO STOP FIGHTING THIS IS A DOCTOR'S OFFICE IF U WANT TO ARGUE GET BACK TO UR HOUSE!

Mom: were sorry doc , anyways what's the cure if we got richard back...?

Doctor: i need to take some blood from him..

Mom: That all it..?

Doctor: well yeah not that hard isn't it?

Mom: well yeah...if only richard wasn't so stubborn so much.

Leo: cmon! i wanna see my father!

Mom: okay fine Leo ur lucky i wanna save u...

Leo: whatever bratty woman.

Mom: don't talk like that to ur mother!

Leo: whatever.

Mom: ur grounded after this!

Leo: i would rather be dead.

at Richard Wannabe's house

Mom: - knocks -

Richard: Oh its just u how are u..?

Mom: idc. but now ur son needs help

Richard: How can i help...?

Mom: by giving some blood to the doctor and we need UR BLOOD.

Leo: yeah dad...pls...

Richard: Son is that u!?

Leo: y-yeah... pls help me... - faints -

they all screamed and called an ambulance as fast as they could

in the hostpital

Doctor: Dont worry guys his okay...u may see him now.

Mom & Richard: THAT IS NOT OUR SON-

Doctor: sorry but he is...he turned into some kind of blob...

Richard: this can't be happening! he's so ugly now!

Mom: ikr!

Sister: Big brother!

Sister: Pls don't hate big brother mommy and daddy!

Mom and Richard: HOW CAN WE NOT HATE HIM HE'S SO UGLY!

Sister: but i still love big brother...

Richard: He isn't ur big brother anymore!

Doctor: sir what do u mean by that?

Richard: I mean he is leaving this family!

Doctor: SIR U CAN'T DO THAT!

Richard: Already did!

Mom: DO U EVEN KNOW WHAT U CALLED U A BRAT!

Sister: Big brother would never call me that! Liar!

Mom and Richard: THEN LIVE WITH HIM! WERE GOING! HAVE FUN ORPHANS! - laughs out -

Sister: - cries - doc! what am i going to do now!?

Doctor: shhh shhh i guess i can adopt u two since i can take care of u both.

Sister: OH TYSM DOC!

Doctor: ur welcome dear :)

Sister: Look Big brother is waking up!

Doctor: How u doing son..?

Leo: what do u mean doc..?

Sister: Mommy and daddy left us and doc adopted us so u should thank him big brother!

Leo: thanks i guess dad...:)

Doctor: ur welcome son!

after a few years later they discovered i was an alien and well they found me very intresting by the years i had made lods of friends and with me and sister and my new dad we lived a happt future together :D and that's where the story ends folks! ty for reading it! ily i hope u enjoyed this series!

[nucl34rb0y]

It was January 25th, Tyler and I just got done watching some stupid sappy love movie in the theatre, his choice since it was his birthday. I paid no attention to the movie though, I was more interested in him. Ever since I moved in with Mark and started editing his videos, I’ve found myself becoming more and more intrested in Tyler, the fans were starting to notice as well, giving us the ship name ‘Tythan’ which I honestly thought was pretty cute. We walked down the street, on our way back home where the others setting up Tyler’s surprise party, since he thought the movie was all that was planned. As we walked it started snowing, a rare thing all the way in L.A. but a wonderful one at that. “Huh, snow, I guess the weather man was wrong yet once again.” Tyler attempts a conversation, it seems played out, like he knows something. I get a text on my phone and check it, it’s Mark.

PARTY NOT READY, KEEP TYLER OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR ANOTHER HALF HOUR

Well sounds like it’s going swell back at the house. Despite the snow, it’s a pretty humid day out, peope running, children outside laughing. It was only five in the afternoon so it was still a little bright out too, it had the resemblance of a game I played a while back, though the name is slipping away from me now. “Is everything alright?” Tyler asks, I assume he’s refering to the text. I cough, “Yeah, everything’s fine, just in my head about some things.” I reply, trying to play off the text and figure out how to keep us busy for another half hour. “You wanna talk about it?” He asks, I stop, thinking this might be a chance to keep him outside for longer. “Yeah sure, why don’t we sit and talk for a bit actually, I’ve been meaning to come outside for a while” I walk over and sit on a bench, kicking my legs back and forth underneath. “Sure, I don’t see why not.” He sits down beside me, laying back a bit so that his arms reach around my shoulders on the back of the seat. “What’s up, bluebird?” He asks, trying to play cool, he always does this when he’s feeling down about something. “Ty?” I ask, deciding to question him about it. “Yeah?” He asks, I try and figure out my wording. “Are you okay? Like, you’ve been talking about some serious stuff lately, and during the live stream you-” He sighs, loudly, as if to tell me he doesn’t want to talk about it, I push forward though. “Ty, if somethings wrong-” “Look, Ethan, nothing is wrong, alright? I’m fine, during the livestream? I was just answering the fans questions, alright? I’m fine.” Lies. “Ty, that’s not 'fine’ you’re acting differently, you’re acting like you were hurt by someone or some thing. Please, tell me what’s going on.” He lays his head back on the seat, sighing again. “Look, Eth, if something was happening I would tell you first, okay? Yeah, Marks my best friend, but he doesn’t take these things too well, as you know he’s gone through a lot in his life.” He says, I knew it. “So there is somethig bothering you.” I say, sitting back and crossing my arms on the back of the seat so that I could look at him better. He looks at me with his bright blue eyes and I smirk, knowing that I’ve reached his core. “Eth, look, yes, something is bothering me, but I know it’s too much for even you to handle. I care about you, a lot, but I don’t want to hurt you.” I look at him questioningly. “Ty, if it’s bothering you then you should tell someone. Not just me, anyone, I don’t want you to pull yourself down because of something. I’ve seen it too much.” I stand up, “Ty, I don’t need you tearing yourself apart because of something, please, just tell me what’s going on.” I feel like I might cry, I care about him too much and he can see that, I know it, I’m showing him too much. “Eth, calm down, I’m fine okay? I’m fine, I’m going to be fine for a while, at least.” He muttered the last part under his breath. He stood up and went over to Ethan, who now sat, arms wrapped around his knees, by a lake. He sat down beside him and looked at Ethan, seeing tears in the younger one’s eyes made him angry, he didn’t want to see Ethan hurt or scared or worried or anything. Ethan was his living ball of sunshine that he cared about and loved. He pulled Ethan to his feet and wrapped his arms around him, hugging him close. “Ty-” he muttered softly. “Yes?” I replied, not knowing that what his bluebird was going to say next would change him forever. “Ty- I- I love you-” Ethan said, looking up at the taller man. Tyler blushed and smiled, “I love you too, Ethan. I don’t have to think twice about saying that.”

ANYWAYSSSSS That took me like 20 minutes to write and I was supposed to be writing a sad thing and it turned out to be really fucking happy and fluffy and I want to fucking scream because jesus fuck man, that’s some cute shit right there.

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Reviews: The Phantom and the Sorceress

Ducktales returns! The Phantom Blot returns to animation after too damn long with a neat backstory, an infnity guantlet and a hate boner for anything magic related. And since Lena is magic related she’s forced to go to her worst enemy and local close up magician Magica De Spell for help. Also Gladstone is here because we missed him and for no other reason. But we missed him so it’s okay. Friendship Is Magic, under the cut. 

Woo-ooo! We’re back! Months later and in a new room, with new things to be depressed about because this year is groundhog day and everyone is bill murray, which isn’t as fun as it should be, Ducktales is finally back on screens and in my heart. And my galbladder.. he really likes ducktales.  But yeah with the recent cancelation of the venture bros, it’s nice to get it’s spirtual littlte brother back just a few weeks later to help fill the void, and while a comparison to it now I know frank’s a fan and noticed the simlarties between rusty and gyro thanks to a tumblr post, the same post for both things inf act, I might just do that one day. But tha’ts not what your here, for , iv’e had to rewrite this intro enough times, Pitter Patter, let’s get at er. 

This episodes opens with Scrooge sitting down for his morning tea when the kids pop out of the tv and hte bored way he figures it out is really hilarious. David Tennat is really good at selling just how Scrooge has both seen it all and has the deductive skills of Barbra Gordon. What eveyrone syaing “Of batman” gets old after a while and she’s just as smart as he is, especially as oracle. Point is it’s a good bit. As he correclty guesses the kids were playing Legends of Nerverquest or whatever that game Huey and Della played last season is called, one of them wished it was real, presumibly Dewey, and Lena’s magic accidently made it happen.  And since it’s her first spotlight episode of the season, and possibly only one since this season is kind of packed, it’s time to talk about Lena! Admitely I PLANNED to do at least her first episode and her two season 2 episodes before this, but life got in the way so here we are. Lena.. is easily one of my faviortes, the number of weblena chats have made that clear. She’sd got a compelling arc, the show tackles abuse well in her narrative, and she and webby have really sweet chemstiry. Plus she brought us Violet and i’ll always be greatful for that and she’s voiced by Kimiko Glenn in her first major voice acting role so that helps too. SHe’s a great addition to the cast and the canon. Same, as the previous comment made obvious, goes for Violet, and the three togther have a great dynamic and i’ts nice to finally see an episode with JUST the three of them post “Friendship Hates Magic.”. 

But yeah Lena’s magic’s been going haywire and I do feel the setups abit rushed.. hilarious but rushed. While Night on Kilmotor hill did establish her magic can run wild, it was also vauge if it was because of her, or it was because magica was messing with her head. IT’s still a plausable setup since we haven’t really SEEN her use her magic or have any intrest and doing so and she’s only done so either while working for magica, to undo something magica did, or to give her sister a mace so she could literally go midevil on some alien ass, it just feels a bit abrubt. And while Night on Kilmotor hill also set up a problem we hadn’t seen on screen, it felt like it gave us more time to ease into it and Lena’s issues, and made it clear SOMETHING was up instead of just telling us that. The rest of hte episode is still good i’ve just seen the show be way better at setup than this. 

But yeah Lena’s magic keeps runing their fun and she feels bad about it, while Scrooge ends up putting his foot and spats in his mouth by voicing his hatred of magic, with all his nephews giving him a “Grandpa no look” and Webby glaring at him.. and whiel I didn’t realize it while watching it.. whiel sh’es given him a disaporving look, the equilvent of shooting bambi in the face emtoinally, she’s only been THIS angry with him one other time.. and it was the time he said “Your not family”. Thankfully this time he’s not in defnstive arrogant bastard mode, so he meekly walks it back to exclude her and she shrugs it off: She hates magic too. And really.. it’s not hard to see WHY given that most times it’s enterted her life, it’s nearly got everyone she loves killed, and that the only spellcaster she knows personally is the absuive aunt whose gaslighted her on multiple occasions, most recently to try and renslave her.  Thankfully before Webby can make an old man bleed for his insesntivity, Della reveals some magical creature is there and Scrooge, while annoyed it’s more magic, is happy for another adventure and invites everyone along. And I jsut love that he dosen’t even show the slightest hesitation bringing Violet and Lena along. As far as he’s concerned probably their family too, maybe not as much as Webby but their still welcome. I mean granted i’m sure della and donald had an awkard conversation with Ty and Indy over all this to make sure it was cool, but still, it’s a nice gesture on his part and show’s his personality: He really dosen’t care who comes along as long as they can pull their weight and share his love for adventure, their welcome.  It’s also nice ot see him and Lena interact since the two really haven’t since the shadow war: Sure he’s been in the same room with her twice, btu they haven’t really spoken. Though my honest guess is they could’ve genuinely meant for Scrooge to adopt her into the family.. but when coming up with Violet found her family adopting her and them becoming sisters to be a better idea and went with that. And to be fair it is, and not just for  shipping purposes, I just wish we got some closure on that line, but i’m also aware the show has a LOT of ground to cover each season, so I understand it probably got squeezed out by all the other stuff going on and don’t really sweat it since we got something better anyway, her getting two gay dads and a sister, it just felt worth talking about.  And in universe.. I feel he didn’t simply because he didn’t either know she was back or have a chance to, though i’m also damn certain, at least in my own headcanon, he helped those men formally adopt her. I mean he owns most of the city, and they probably also had to make Lena legally exist in the first place since I doubt Magica bothered to put her on any offical records that weren’t signed in blood and written on paper made of avian flesh, which given SCrooge’s experince is probably not the first time he had to get a person into official records who came into being by way of magic or some other weirdness. 

Anyways, Lena opts out of the adventure because she’s worried about it going haywire and Webby opts out out of sympathy and while Violet is clearly keen to go, she gladly does so for her sister.. though this just makes Lena feel worse since now her girlfriend and her sister are missing out on stuff because of her, and suggests just going to sleep before she whoopsie daisy magics them to death.  The girls end up woken from their sleep however by a bang at the door. It’s Gladstone!

Yup it’s time to talk about another character I haven’t talked about yet. Gladstone is easily one of the show’s best overhauls. See in the comics while Gladstone is just as lucky and lazy.. he’s also just.. 

Okay i’m amazed it’s taken this long for me to refrence jean ralphio in one of these reviews but i’m glad it was for this.  Back on topic, while I know Gladstone in the comics has his fans, and is softend a bit in european comics, but in most stories i’ve read with him he’s an insufferably arrogant dick. Even BEFORE getting his luck, his first apperance, which I own in trade and read earlier this year, has him trying to take Donald’s house and kick him and the nephews out on the street over a drunken wager to take a polar dive, which Donald fials because life hates him and he’s a coward. Thankfully Daisy rushed in and saved the day because she’s great sometimes ,and turned things on him wiht his own drunken crap, but still, it says something when your first apperance is trying to force three ten year olds and your own cousin out into the cold. 

He .. did not get any better once his super luck came into play. Instead he just flautned it all the time and tried to constnatly win Daisy over from donald.. which had varying sucess based on how much of a shallow dick she was being that story, and in general was just unplesant. He really only works for me in comic in those aformetioned softer times: when a writer makes his luck ruin his love life or add actual depth instead of him just being the raincloud on donal’ds parade. The original ducktales and the going quackers game are the only places I can think of he showed up otherwise, prototype in the old disney shorts nonwithstanding, and Ducktales Classic made him a nice guy from what i’ve heard. Thankfully frank and crew knew exactly what to do to adapt him perfectly: He still retains some aspects from the comics: Donald and Scrooge still hate him, Donald for Gladstone always winning and always having it easy while Donald.. is donald and thus utterly miserable half the time and on fire the other half, and Scrooge because he’s a lazy asshole who gets whatever he wants with the least effort, which didn’t change. What did change was his attitude. While he still is proud of getting whatever he wants in life with no effort and being “the best at getting something for nothing” he dosen’t lord it over everyone else. Sure he’s proud of it but he dosen’t rub Donald’s nose in how much better off he is on purpose, and genuinely loves his family, something I really coudln’t say about most versions of comic Gladstone. While he’s self serving he’s perfectly happy to share his luck with whoever else: He can always get more money whenever he needs it because of course he will. The other factor helping is , as with this entire reboot, the voice acting, in this case the marvelous Paul F Thompkins of Bojack and so much other stuff fame, who really sells the “Sleazy vegas layabout” vibe this series gives him, updating his old aristocratic asshole vibe to something more fun to watch and really being a treat anytime gladstone comes up. Gladstone singing in season 2 was entirely something Paul Improvised during his first apperance they made sure to use eventually. He’s a delight any time he shows up and a total 180 from his utterly agrviating original version. 

As for why he’s here.. said luck. is gone. After being hit by some weird energy, Gladstone suddenly, since he didn’t see it hit him, finds himself living normally: going to a restraunt offers no free meal for being 100th custmoer or anything, his wallet dosen’t magically have 20 dollars in it, and the atm gives him 20 dollars.. which would seem normal except it’s actually usually a sack of rubys.  Naturally Gladstone having coasted his entire life on his magical luck, has no idea how to function as a normal human being and is utterly hilarious as he breaks down. Admitely he’s not the biggest part of the plot, he’s mostly here for comic relief and COULD have been eaisly cut.. but he’s so hilarious and seeing him utterly fail at being a normal person and whine about things as simple as walking or going up stairs is just groovy.  As for what weird magical bolt took it, Violet being violet figures it out quick: The Phantom Blot! For those unfamiliar, he’s a charcter from the mickey mouse comics, though I know him from one episode of house and mouse that adapted those comics that I need to read more of, a master schemer and old school villian par excellence and Mickey’s greatest foe. I was ecastic to see him come here and in the capable hands of Giancarlo Espisto. While I haven’t watched brekaing bad i’ve heard nothing but good thigns and he does his best with what little he’s given. But here instead of a master schemer he’s an infamous magic theif and is obviously the one who drained gladstone.. and unforutntely for scrooge the boys and presumibly everyone else... we see him in action using his fancy infnity guantlet esque magic draining gauntlet to drain the portal they took. Ruh Roh.  It gets worse when he mistakes Lena for magica, and charges after her, though Webby is able to hold him off with the axe she grabbed on the way to the door earlier, and damages his gauntlet. he retreats.. but it’s obvious he’ll be back and both Webby and Violet come to the conclusion Lena needs to grasp her magic in order to survive.. and both have the same unfortunate relization: They only know one person who can do it and Lena, once she realizes what hteir thinking, wnats nothing to do with her, and neither do they. But they have no options: they have to go to magica.  So they journey to her house on Dagobah, with Gladstone tagging along because they need a wacky comedic sidekick to help lighten the mood what with the serious, grim hunter wanting to murder a teenage girl inf nront of her tweenage girlfriend and kid sister, and their only resort being going back to her abuser for help.  Magica however isn’t all that helpful at first. Being Magica her first move is to make a grab for the Amulet to get her power back, which her running crew thwart quickly but naturally Lena still wants nothing to do with her and Magica just insults her for not using magic and because she’s a terrible person. SHe does however end up changing her tune when she hears the blot’s involved. She whisks them inside while we get a cutaway to FOWL headquarters where blot is working on his guantlet more on him in a minute.  We soon get the Blot’s backstory which is actually really inttresting and invovled even if it’s not a lot like who he is in the comcis or house of mouse: A long ass time ago before meddling kids got in her way, Magica took over a small vililage with the threat of destroying it and eveyrone in it outright unless they gave her tributes.. and when those got boring she just did it anyway. Problem was, as happens a lot when evil sorecerers calously destroy hometowns, one of them survivied. It’s even lampshaded by Magica as she points out Blot wasn’t the first. The problem was.. he was persitant. The blot never gave up, coming up with better tech to fight her magic each time and coming back stronger and likely more determined. I like this verson: While he’s not the bwahahah mastermindk, he’s still an utter threat, a force with an unyielding hatred and a burning mission to take out the target of his hate and anything like her. He reminds me a lot of toffee from star vs but if htey actually gave his backstory on screen. A meancing, somehwat quite, or mostly silent in the blot’s case, immortal menace who’s deterimiend to wipe out those who wronged him and anything related to them and has warped from what was once probably a decen tperson into a human engine of destruction with one goal and one goal only. He’s a good enoguh villian for the episode, I just hope if he comes back they give him better lines. his dialouge is really what dosen’t work for me as whiel his backstory and aura of meance work, Giancarlo is given nothing to work with line wise. He dosen’t need to be a chatty cathy or anything, just give him one or too really cool lines. Sometimes tha’ts all you need. Watch how the pros do it. 

I do like this verison, I jsut think they could do more, but given the show has a good track record for only getting better with their villians with every use, I have no worries about that and he’s still a cool enough threat. I also wish we got more of fowl or why he’s working with them. just a small scene with one of them was all I asked, because we’ve barely gotten fowl this season. It’s really one of the season’s only real problems so far: 8 episodes in and while FOWL agents have shown up twice, adn one of the episodes did advance that plot by showing off heron and steelbeak, we really haven’t seen any progress on their plans to both take the missing mysteries or kill the Clan McDuck. HOpefully this changes as we go and again, it dosen’t ditract from the episode itself, jsut the season as a whole.  Anyways, Lena is still relucntant because Magica is terrible and keeps slipping in how much she wants to take the amulet every five minutes. I love the show and catherine tate’s take on magica: just as hammy and nuts as before but when she does have magic, she’s the utter threat she was before too times ten.  But yeah while Lena’s relunctant.. neither of htem really has a choice> Magica needs her amulet secure to get her magic back, and Lena needs to not die. So they relucntantly agree to work together among more hilarous sniping.  Cue a training montage set to a hell of an 80′s tune. The show really has a good habit of making good incdental music to use in bits like this. Lena trains, uses gladstone as the training dummy, and it’s funny as it is creative and we even get some karate kids bit and the obvious star wars refrences. Meanwhile the blot approaches ever closer..  We also find out something important from Magica as she chastises Lena for having fun with her friends while training after Lena uses blue magic instead of purple: Turns out much like spellcasters in say owl house or my little pony each caster has a specific color to their magic, a Colur of magic if you will. Magica’s, and lena using hers is purple while the blue magic we’ve seen from her is her own powered by friendship and love. It’s a nice advancement of what we’ve seen so far: We’ve seen her magic powered by webby is stronger than her other stuff, and we’ve seen it come out during times their bond, or in the case of kilmotor hill her bond with everyone, is strongest. We knew something was diffrent with the magics and it’s now given a though and clearly well thought out explination why: Magica’s magic is hers and Lena was just borrowing it.. the blue stuff is hers and hers alone.  Magica does try to get her to master it by having one of her friends shoot her.. Webby of course strongly objects so Violet takes it up since it is for study after all and her sister can take a hit. Lena also wonders how she can even do magic without the amulet, but as Magica makes clear, and as I outlined above, the amulet is just help. The blue magic is her. Lena fails to use it though to deflect in time.. and to make matters worse the blot shows up after plopping gladstone down and wants to kill them  both.  We then get easily the best laugh of the episode.. as Magica tries stage magic and the blot wonders what the hell he’s looknig at. I mean this is his mortal enemy, the monster who killed everyone he’d ever known or loved... pulling out a bunch of colored rags and asking him to pick a card. It’s amazing. Lena attacks from the side and Webby and Violet quickly asist, with Magica joining in to use the rope to bind him and Lena’s magic kicking in, turning the rope into chain and summoning a snake.. but in a show of badassery the blot easily shrugs it off: he absorbs the magic, escapes and knocks them around while Webby asks the snake for help.. can she speak snake? She hopes so. 

Then things get dire as The Blot starts absorbing the magic.. and killing lena as she starts to fade away. Magica of course can’t even feign dispaointment in anything but loosing her magic. And that’s also something I really love here: The show makes no attempt to make magica better or turn around because it just isn’t who she is and even if she did after all the abuse she did, Lena would have zero reason to forgive her. It’s nice that they DON’T try redemeing her or shoing a brighter side: she’s a bad person, a worse caregiver and they only came to her because they had no choice. 

But as the magic’s absorbed magica does tell her to find the source of the power and we get a great scene: She first thinks of all the abuse magica’s done to her and it’s a harrowing montage to watch. But webby, breaks through that, since that obviouslyf ails and reminds her of where HER magic comes from: Her and webby. and we get an adorable,a nd shiptastic montage as we see more clips from past episodes.. but this time we see their adorable fistbump from “Beagle BOy Birthday Massacre”, their hug from “Jaw$!” and Lena’s return to the world and hug with her lady and future sister from “Friendship hates magic”. IT’s her friends, her sister and the love of her life who are her real source of power, and her magic connects to htem as lena ccccchanges.  And I mean entirely, her outfit changes and she gets these.. weird bright blue eyes. Like I like the rest of her outfits, a white and blue attire to show her change with a badass cape, looks like a superhero so naturally I love it.. her eyes just look really off. Like when Milo Muprhy’s law tried to give characters colored irses. Because no one else in ducktales has them it just loosk.. weird.. Otherwise though I like it. We then get a beam struggle, but with adde dhelp from her friends and her new power, Lena eventually beats the blot, as her sheer power overloads the guantlet and sends him running. However in the confusion the amulet was lost.. and Magica gets it back. Lena whollops her easily, pointing out her magic’s purpose is to protect the world from people like her. It’s a nice development too: Lena realizes MAGIC isn’t inherently evil... it’s how it’s used. Star Vs could’ve maybe taken this lesson, but regardless, it’s a nice bit of character development realizing that magic is a part of her IS Her, and she shoudln’t have to give up something in her nature because of her abuser. Magica, while repowered, is force dto lookf or her staff while Lena gladly floats team magic home. Also with the guantlet broken gladstone is back, as a rain of 20 dolalr bills he uses as tissues confims, and the portal returns, and with Lena you know, havin ga whole superhero outfit, glowing blue eyes and her hair streak now blue, they know something clearly happend and the episode just kind of ends. Still a good one.  Final Thoughts: This was a good one as I just said. While I had my nitpicks here and there as I also said, Lena’s strong character, and the game performances of Espisito, Thompkins, and Tate really add to our usual trlo, and as I mentioned before it’s nice ot see team magic get their own episode now their a full team. IT’s just a good romp and a good way back. I”ve made my complaints clear but their drowned out by good jokes, good character stuff, and good worldbuilding that makes this an utter thrill and a great one to come back to and i’tll also be intresting to see where Lena goes from here.  But wherever she goes she’ll have webby. They can be whot hey are, independent together, if theyt ry. And yes that’s my shiping song for htem and yes I have one. 

Quick bit before I go I dind’t get to, Gladstone flirts with magica when she lands in his arms, a little something for the shippers and a nice gesture on frakn’s part. Whle she rejects him and he dumps her in the sludge with a shrug. I mean.. their probably going to bang at some point. Gladstone’s powers mean he’ll likely find her when sh’es super horny and more than willing, and he’ll be like “eh why not boobs”. I mean I thought about this: I figure his powers allow him to find a willing partner, any gender or none at all I see him as pansexual, who happens to probablyb e loaded and diseased free, whenever he happens to be into it who naturallyw orks out perfectly because if he gets money whenever he wants it, why not sex? It’s not even a concious thing as we’ve seen things just work out for him so of course he probably gets laid, and as we see here it’s only if the other person consets. Good for him. Hope to see him again sooner. I want to see more of him and della interacting and see what she thinks of him. Freshe eys andall that. 

But yeah this was great to come back to. If you liked this i’ve reviewed the rest of the season up to this point and will be reviewing each episdoe every monday till they stop again, so keep an eye out for that.  You can check the tabs on my blogs for more reviews, come back this weekend for regular loud house coverag,e follow for more reviews or shoot me a pm if you’d like to comission me to do an episode. For just 5 bucks i’ll review any episode of any animated show of your choosing, and as i’ve only covered one season 2 episode of ducktales, there’s over 40 left ot choose from if you have any you want to hear my thoughts on. Until then stay safe, quack hard, and Go Team Venture! Play us out Steg .. and Co. 

[popculturebuffet]

Simpsons Review: Simpsons Comics #102 “Uncle Burn$” or Homercore Nudity!

Whelp out of all the commissions Kev has thrown me this one’s kind of a curveball. I mean it makes sense why cover it: It’s a pastiche of Donald Duck Comics done in the pages of the Simpsons long running comics. I cover duck stuff on here, and not only do I love the Simpsons but I tend to reference it for jokes a LOT. I just genuinely never thought of reviewing it till now, likely because earlier on in my new career of reviewing animated shows, I wasn’t really convinced I could do pure comedies. With my regular reviews of Darkwing Duck and as it comes out coverage of the Loud House (I still need to get around to Band Together), that’s no longer a real issue and I should consider doing the show in the future, especially since I have an unabashed love for the first 10 seasons and a few episodes beyond that. 

As you can tell, I love the Simpsons. While I do genuinely wish it would end and have no real intrest in the current seasons, though if you’d like me to take a look i’d be willing to. The show in it’s prime was funny, witty and each episode was crammed with jokes. And refreshingly for an adult cartoon show of it’s time,  the show genuinely wasn’t afraid to mix things up: Milhouse’s parents divorced and stayed that way for so long that them apparently getting back together decades later is itself a huge status quo shake up.  Lisa went Vegetarian which stuck thanks to sir paul mcartney, and then went Buddhist, both of which have never wavered since and both fit her well. Skinner and Krabbable started dating. Barney went sober for a few seasons. Apu got married. These are minor changes but the show does have things happen occasionally and doesn’t just snap everything back and it adds genuine tension to plots knowing they might stay the status quo They usually don’t but the occasional change gives things stakes. I could go on for days, but I couldn’t go on for 8 weeks, point is the Simpsons are awesome, and deserve the praise they get early on I just wish they’d stop as by this point people really have stopped carring and it’s time to pass the torch and Let Bob’s burgers be the wholesome family comedy that runs forever.. and even then that one should stop at 10 seasons. Or if not at least let the kids age dammit.  But that aside, while many of you simpsons fans looking at this probably have at least seen the comics, or a collection of them over the decades, many of you like me are wondering what the hell Bongo Comics is and how they managed to last so long. Bongo was founded by Simpsons Creator Matt Groening in 1993. Matt Groening had noticed that at the time there just weren’t any funny books on the shelves, funny books being comedy based comics primarily targeted for kids, with Archie and Disney being really the only ones left at the time. So he founded Bongo to rectify that, and given Fox naturally liked the sound of more merchandising dollars, the publisher was primarily used to produce simpsons comics, though looking at wikipedia there were one or two that weren’t including, of all things, a Coldplay comic tying into their album. Why did Coldplay publish a comic book at a primarily simpsons comic book company?

Though most series seem to be either short lived or one shots, there were a few exceptions: Naturally the company put out an annual Treehouse of Horror issue, there was a Bart Simpson ongoing focusing on him and the other kids of Springfield, I had a trade for that one once, and once Futurama premiered it too got a comic book that held through both cancelations. But standing above them all was Simpsons Comics, a 245 issue long runner that ran all the way up to the company’s closing, likely due to a combination of a lack of profits and the then upcoming Disney-Fox merger depriving them of the very heart and soul of the company. 

Naturally being a Simpsons fan I have a connection to these comics having gotten the trades out of the library multiple times as well as the collection of Bartman’s solo series, which was my favorite and I might cover some day. In addition to the Free Comic Book Day issues i also picked up scattered issues over my life since, much like Archie, Simpsons comics were a mainstay of bookstores and super markets and the decline of both comic markets is likely why the Simpsons comics started to peter out in the first place. The quality and memorability of the stories varied but they were a fun thing to have around and it’s sad to see them go, as well as see Disney not even make a remote attempt to bring them back or at the very least republish the vast library they now have access to. Also finally if your wondering yes, there indeed was a Simpsons/Futurama crossover. And no I have not read it.  So with that history, most of which I just learned some of which I already knew, in mind, it is very fitting the comic’s did a tribute to the Uncle Scrooge comics. Though it does feel very weird that I have yet to cover any Donald Duck or Scrooge comics.. yet i’ve already covered one of the Ducktales tie in comics and a Simpsons homage to it. I’m going to have to correct that but until then, join me under the cut as I dive into adventure with the Simpsons. 

This issue was written by Ian Boothby and drawn by John Delaney, I feel mentiong the writers and artists should be important in comic reviews and I kick myself for not having done that or gone into them as much before. Boothby was apparently the Ian Flynn of these comics, writing more simpsons comics than any other writer according to wikipedia and winning an Eisner for his work on the comic if sadly not this issue. He was nominated for an outstanding Canadian Writer award for it though so that’s good. Point is the guy is a decorated vetran of this series and it shows in how good this issue is and I felt he deserved some recognition as most Comic Book Readers, myself included up till now, likely weren’t aware he even existed nor took over the comic in the 2000′s. 

We open with Burns getting attacked by a mummy! Gotta say wasn’t expecting this as where we started out but the simpsons have started with wonkier premises to end up somewhere. I mean there was the time a bag boy strike ended up with them in Africa. Also i’d say Burns should call the police, being the kind of privileged white guy they actually care about protecting and all, but frankly the Springfield Cops don’t have the best track records with Mummies:

But no it’s just Smithers, who dove in heroically to save the company 15 dollars after Homer took a bet to see how many fire crackers he could jam in his computer’s disk drive. Lenny said 20 but he proved him wrong. And yes those are all actual jokes from the comic, this issue is very funny and feels very much like a Golden Age Simpsons episode. They also all gather to sign Smither’s cast.. which naturally is a legally binding contract.  Burns takes his loyal minion to get some quality medical care only to find an arcade because he traded the Medical Bay in for one during an outbreak of Pac Man Fever... again I really can’t top that and there may be a good reason why I haven’t covered the Simpsons till now. But yeah as Buns gives Smithers a roll of Pennies, he wonders who to have replace Smither’s on their annual summer treasure hunt.. which would come out of nowhere but we genuinely don’t know what they do most summers. I assumed Burns just road Smithers like a horse to play cricket while Smithers enjoyed it way too much. But a stray comment from Homer getting a Krusty Doll from a crane machine about being king of the treasure hunters leads to this. 

I mean it’s an easy joke but damn if it didn’t get a laugh out of me. So later at the old Simpsons place, because this comic is fantastic, Marge and Homer talk things over, but Homer insists Burns said he’d split the treasure, and Lisa wishes she could come along. And Marge says he should, especially for his own saftey.. and when Bart complains, says all the kids should go, she already packed their bags, she’s heading to Rancho Relaxo byyyyeeeeeee. Once again, this comic is amazing, and I would say this is out of character for Marge, but frankly that’s the whole point. Plus it really isn’t when she has to deal with 4 children on a regular basis, and her sisters, and a town gone mad.. yeah can’t blame her here. 

The next day at Burns Office, Homer is wearing his navy outfit.. or rather Donald’s Navy outfit. But given I did a quick google and found him having at least 4 different outfits during his time in the Naval Reserves, it’s not a stretch to assume the Simpsons Version of the Navy gave these out too. Seriously Ian Boothby has put more thought into continuity than most writers on the show proper. Also Simpsons Tide, season 9 episode, still very memorable and hilarious and not due to childhood nostalgia. Just looking up this bit had me laughing hard. 

I now  want to watch that episode sometime soon so thanks Kev. Anyway Homer seems to have misplaced his plants. Now I could spare you the image since I don’t do things panel by panel anymore and only use panels from a comic when relevant. Buttttt

This traumatizing of my audience brings me to a point about this issue and why it works. While there are tons of nods to the Donald Duck comics and what their homaging is very clear, the issue doesn’t REQUIRE you know them to enjoy it.  Knowing them I obviously enjoy it more, but most of the jokes aren’t reliant on you knowing anything about the barks comics and even someone with a passing knowledge of  the Original Ducktales can still get the reference if not why Donald is here. It helps this is less of a parody, with the exception of some jokes, and more of an homage, using stylistic elements of those comics while telling i’ts own story as a loving tribute to it’s predecessors. Speaking of one of those jokes poking fun at the source material, Burns is delighted Homer brought child labor, which kept me laughing for a good minute, and when the kids introduce themselves we get this bit. 

Not only am I 100% sure every version of Donald or Della did this to make sure they could tell them apart, very much including the reboot with Donald, but it’s a genuine hilarious bit. Donald’s response as they head off is “there’s somehting hooey Dewey and screwy about this. “ Also I will criticize the fact Bart isn’t the one wearing a blue outfit. For those wondering why, after all Maggie wears blue shouldn’t she get it, who haven’t seen this a LOT of merchandise early on had Bart in a blue shirt, due to early Merch being rushed out pre-show and since he wore one in some earlier concept art, he got to wear blue. He also wore it late into the 90′s. 

Sidebar: I just found this and while it isn’t a bad joke given his character it is  questionable to have a fourth grade boy tell you to buy him. Just saying. But the reason I bring it up is partly because the show itself referenced it at one point. 

As well as it’s sister show Futurama

And you remeber that Bart Simpson solo I mentioned? That one frequently, both in and out of story, had Blue Shirt bart show up for some variety. 

Also why yes each issue does have it’s own fun “Superman’s Pal Jimmy Oleson” Esque subtitle. And I love it so. Point is Blue Bart is part of the series legacy and this very comic company, so it’s VERY weird to not have that here. That being said there were  a few Green Shirt barts apparently as a printing error, so he could just as easily be 80 steps ahead of me. I just don’t know. 

Back at the plot Burns and the Simpsons show up at Frink’s lab, Frink rather obviously filling in for Gyro, with his own version of little bulb named F.L.O. who gladly shakes Lisa’s hand.. and releases a Pterodactyl but hey you can’t win em all. It’s a nice nod, though one only fans of the source matieral will really get, but the pterodactyl bit right after helps distract from it. Frink slotts into the roll well, as Frink has no reall affiliation with anyone and is basically, much like Gyro, there for various characters to go too when the story or joke needs him. Frink has two gadgets for them: Some Scuba suits that can go to any depth and a grappling claw that accidently gets him gripped to the pterodactyl. Also homer accidently switches suits with maggie, so we get an adorable shot of her serenely sleeping in a diving helmet while her daddy chokes to death. 

So the next day it’s out to the open seas where The Simpsons are doing all the work while Burns lounges.. which yeah this is a typical uncle scrooge adventure all right. While the man unlike Burns does work hard and do things for himself, he spent most voyages talking about the destination while putting all the hard work on Donald, in case you thought there was at least one universe where Donald isn’t miserable most of the time. Lisa wonders what he’s doing and we get this lovely bit. 

I just.. can’t stop finding that hilarious or a nice way to get the Uncle Scrooge bit in there while still fitting the Simpsons, and it at least explains what happened to Herb, whose been mentioned all of once in the 30 seasons since he last showed up. I checked. And yes for those unaware, which is fair, or who just now remembered Homer does indeed have a brother, one his dad had out of an affair who showed up twice, once with Homer unintentionally, and largely due to Herb’s own foolishness, ruining his life, the other time with Maggie helping him get back on top and him and Homer reconciling. He’s also voiced by comedic legend and your friend and mine, Danny Devito, whose still making us all laugh to this day and is a wonderful person from all accounts. Rock on Danny, here’s the only way I can think to honor you. 

But yeah it’s a good gag. Burns claims to be watching for a Giant Squid.. and turns out to be right. So it’s up to the simpsons to fight the giant squid, a sentence I genuinely didn’t expect.. I thought like the Griffins they’d just ignore it. 

I miss that show.. oh i’m aware Family Guy is still running but much like the Simpsons the show it USED to be is long gone. Anyways Bart tells a worried homer octopus suck out the innards and drink it first quipping “It’s not like you haven’t been drunk in the morning before homer. Homer chokes bart only for the squid to choke him which is easily the second best “Homer getting choked after Choking bart” gag i’ve seen.. the best being this one I found on youtube. 

Though personally my faviorite part of that whole bit is Bart’s proud “THAT’S BECAUSE I SOAKED HIM IN SLIME!” Anyways Lisa figures out a way to beat the squid, painting the likeness of each of them on it’s tentacles and letting the thing devour itself. Lisa lampshades it making no sense PHysics wise but with that she reluctantly accepts calling Mr. Burns, Uncle Burns and we’re off to our next location.  Next up is Mt. Donrosa, a very clear nod to Uncle Scrooge maestro Keno “Don” Rosa, an avid fan of Barks work who expanded on it and turned it into a solid continuity, most famously, and what got me into the ducks in the first place, with the epic “Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck” which I proudly own and.. well I did say watch this space didn’t I?  Enough hinting at the future as the Simpsons scale the mountain with Homer carrying burns up on a rickshaw. Burns however looses his lucky #1 penny, SUBTLE, and cuts Bart down to get it. We then get the best line of the issue:

Bart thankfully survives and we find out the Penny, much like Scrooge’s Dime is how Burns started his fortune.. for this issue and nowhere else but that’s standard for the Simpsons. Specifically loading it into a gun and threatning to kill Jasper’s grandfather with it during the gold rush, a nice twist. At the top of the mountain they find the fabled key of Strobl, which comes from the Taliaferro tribe.. more refrenes this time though I didn’t know them and had to google. Tony Strobl was an artist on the Duck Comics at one ponit  and Al Taliforino id forgotten about. He did the Donald Duck comic strip which I had heard of and weirdly hasn’t been collected yet despite Fantagraphics covering mickey, as well as reprinting barks and rosa’s respective works. 

The key is suspended in the air by what Lisa suspects to be magnetics, and while Burns plan is naturally “Have Bart swim in it and see if he surivives”, Bart, still pissed from the penny and not wanting to die today, grabs the Penny and uses his slingshot to fire it at the Key. The bad luck from the penny casues an erruption, but Bart once again saves the day and has them surf down, with naturally tons more great jokes.  The family enjoys some steamed Seafood, except Lisa whose eating Seaweed, while Homer enjoys a sting ray “It tastes as good as it stings, Ow, Ow.” ON to Goddfrodson Trench, an odd choice given Floyd Goddfrodson was barks equivalent for the Mickey Mouse Comics and not really a duck writer, but he still deserves the honor regardless.  Under the Sea, no accusations just friendly crustaceans here.. our heroes are close to the treasure but loose the map to the Jailbird Boys, aka Snake and his cousins, who found out due to Lisa’s blog. She didn’t want to loose any more readers to Sheri and Teri’s Olson Twin’s Fan Page.. which.. it’s 2004.. weren’t they dead by this point? Nope still alive? Still are today in fact? Alrighty then. Also this bit, and some of the other references are a bit heavy handed, I will admit that, but the jokes are high quality enough otherwise that it just comes off as a bit of an adorable wink more than laziness. 

Snake and co cut their air with Starfish used as throwing stars. 

The gang tie their air suplies to avoid dying, and Maggie, in a clever bit, talks with the starfish, since they communicate via sucking, to attack the Jailbird Boys. Again.. 

I genuinely don’t know, but our heroes find the fabled vault of Barks Billion.. named after Bark Barks, that polar bear from the sonic games.. no of course it’s named after Disney Duck God Carl Barks, who created the Duck’s share of Donald and Scrooge’s supporting cast: Uncle Scrooge himself, Daisy Duck, a fact I just learned but given he created her first short “Mr Duck Steps Out, shouldn’t of surprised me, The Beagle Boys, Magica DeSpell, Goldie O Gilt, Flintheart Glomgold, Gyro Gearloose, Gladstone Gander, The Junior Woodchucks as a whole, Neighbor Jones, John D. Rockerduck, The Number One Dime, Gus Goose, April, May, June and Whitewater Duck. Just the sheer impact he’s had on the comics on all continents cannot be overstated. He is also the one who refined Huey Dewey and Louie from hellraising little shits to the good little boys they are today.. well okay they were, thankfully the reboot has created much better versions. Point is what a man, what a man what a mighty good man, he is truly missed.  We get two great homer gags in the same page, one where somehow he’s put the giant key on a key ring and still can’t find it.. with Bart helpfully taking it from him, and then we get this, which I missed on my first read through. 

Naturally Burns betrays them, using a Gold Magnet, kay, to suck up all the gold and naturally planning to leave the Simpsons for dead to no one’s surprise. But thanks to Bart teaching Maggie how to use the spittoons, Homer gets one stuck on his head.. and starts getting sucked up with the Simpsons using them to escape. Naturally Lisa’s first instinct is obvious. 

But Burns weasels his way out by promising them free gold after their free lunch. Naturally the next day this turns out ot be a trick as their lunch came from frinks and thus, for now, their weightless.. but Karma gets Burns when he tries swimming in his new gold vault... only for the natural result of what happens when am an who never exercises and who doctors once described as having so many diseases packed into his body at once they tripped each other off and that a strong wind could kill him, trying to do with a similarly aged but still physically fit and well trained at swimming in money man does on a daily basis. 

We then close on a quick gag of weightless homer getting caught on fire and we’re out. 

Final Thoughts:  This was a really excellent comic. It captured the tone of the Simpsons at their best and while stiff in a place here or there, it’s mostly just really funny, entertaining and a nice and warm tribute to Donald and Scrooge’s long comics history, not really mocking it but instead just homaging it, while still throughly feeling like the Simpsons. It honestly feels like the Treehouse of Horor Segement on the shining, a bit that parodies something, but for the most part the jokes still feel firmly rooted in the simpsons and their cast. This was a treat to review and i’m glad Kev comissoned it and I may take a look at more Simpsons in the future. If you guys like this review, you can follow me on patreon at patreon.com/popculturebuffet, or if  there’s a specific simpsons or ducktales episode or a specific comic you want me to review, you can comission your own review for just five bucks. Just send me a direct message on here through Tumblr, or take a look at my ask box or submit. However you want to do it. I take payments through paypal and until next time: Happy Days are Here Again. 

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Reviews!: The Split Sword of Swanstatine! or Sometimes You Just Have to Punch Your Problems Away

The race for the missing mysteries takes Scrooge, the kids and a sorta hyjacked Lena and Violet to a mystical market to hunt down the pieces of the mythical sword of the warrior king swanstanine. Naturally a split artifact leads to a vignette episode as the kids pair up to find the pieces while Scrooge and Heron face off. Dewey and Webby face blindness, Louie and Violet face Louie’s reputation as an underworld kingpin, and Huey and Lena face Huey’s Feral Side. The race is on with full recap and spoilers under the cut. 

Not a lot of background here.. I was excited enough for this one as Steelbeak and Rockerduck came back, but I went from “This will be pretty good and oh look Flula Borg” to HOLY SHIT LENA AND VIOLET ARE BACK LET’S GO ALREADY. So yeah, there’s not a lot to get started here that can’t be done as we go, let’s get out there and talk about some ducktales.  We open in a vast marketplace whose name i’ve already forgotten.. it’s almost 4 in the morning here and I have terrible memory with name sometimes, I make no apologizes. Naturally given the big declaration at the end of the last episode the family is on the hunt for a missing mystery.. and Dewey is on the hunt for Street Meat, though Scrooge denies him any till they get the job done... I mean they can eat and go treasure hunting. They can do two things. Let him have some lamb dammit, spiced lamb is fucking delcious you monster! Or whatever that is the point is it’s larged, well seasoned and makes me hungry!  But starving his grandchildren aside, Scrooge has no doubt they can acomplish this as a family.. and then notices his future in laws are also there and his whole big speech game is thrown off by the question of why. To me it’s because we need more of them, quit old man your already 0-2 this episode, but turns out the explination is one of the funniest jokes of the season.. and this is a season that’s include “There now your susceptible to vampires”, “Yipiee Kai Yay Mr. Falcon!”, Darkwing’s Cookbook, Gene’s Soda Commerical, Gladstone having a mental breakdown over having to be a normal person, and Della trying to deflect the blame for traumatizing children. This bit is on par with that.  Violet explains that Scrooge told everyone to get on the plane. I assume Donald and Della are with their signifigant others, Beakly was getting some much needed therapy and Launchpad.. was flying the plane.. and also had Drake and Gosalyn with him because he double booked and had to take them with him to assist whatever ex of his is in trouble this week. Point is that bit’s freaking hilarious and Scrooge simply asks if they enjoy history and the answers are a predictable “Not really” from Lena, which given her own personal history is vast, terrible, and traumatizing up until the last year and her adoption by two gay men, relationship with a charming young lady, and gaining a beloved nerdy sister, that tracks. Violet of courser says it’s her life. Scrooge takes it: He’s used to having half his adventuring party either not caring about culture and history, the Saberwings just keep the average up. So Webby does the natural thing and tackle hugs her girlfriend and future sister in law while Scrooge smiles because why wouldn’t you. 

And I was happy about this: not just hte tackle hug, because that was precious, but Scrooge eagerly accepting them along for the ride. I was worried for half a second that as good as the gag was that’d be the episodes big underlying issue.. but nope, his confusion was more “Wait why are the extra children here”, than questions of worth and given their previous appearance had him willingly inviting them along, and Lena and Violet only opting out due to fears about her magic getting them all killed and to support her sister, it woudln’t of made any character sense for him not to, doubly so since their up against a shadowy organization of ruthless thugs. Granted Beakly likely sighed after returning from her midnight therapy and called the Saberwing parents by Ty and Indy are probably used to their daughter’s friends elderly Uncle taking them to strange places in the middle of the night by this point. I mean one of their daughters can turn bluper sayain now, the ship on normal behavior kind of sailed over a cliff a while ago. 

But Scrooge soon detects what he thinks is heron but is actually a woman who justifiably punches him. Turns out Heron was actually hiding in a stall though, and brought all her friends with her.. except Blot.. and while at first I was going to make a joke I realized they probably don’t want the guy who drains the magic out of everything near a magic artifact he’d probably destroy despite the consequences. So Bradford probably just sent him to murder the lucky charms leprechaun... he DOES have a life outside of trying to Murder scrooge... he can want to murder cereal mascots too. He’s a renascence evil mastermind. A sword fight ensues, with Scrooge telling the kids to pair up and go find the pieces while he keeps Heron busy. 

Cue Credits and cue the episode itself being split into three vignettes. I do love vignette episodes, episodes of half hour shows that split into 3 different stories taking place at the same time and break from the formula, with two of the best I can think of being the Avatar classic “Tales from Ba Sing Sei”, most famous for the really gutpunching bit with Iroh singing at his dead son’s grave.. jesus I teared up, not a joke or an exaggeration literally teared up, just thinking about it. On the opposite end we have the season 12 Simpson’s episode Trilogy of Error, which while during when the rot started to set in for the series is easily a classic on the sam tier as the first 10 seasons. It alfeatured an at the time young Daniel Radcliff as Lisa’s love interest, Marge getting accused of attempted murder after accidently chopping homer’s finger off, Bart and Milhouse turning informant ont he mob and  the tragic life of Linguo. It’s a classic. 

But yeah three pieces, three teams of two, and three story segments. So like last week I can easily divide the stories up and unlike last week I won’t be frontloading or forgetting anything since their divided up much more evenly and are played back to back to back rather than intercutting. So with that in mind...

Dewey and Webby: The Hidden Truths of Temporary Blindness and the Albino Snakes We Mistook for Cats Along the Way

The Dynamic Duo Returns! Seriously I did the legowork, I.e. went to google and despite the two’s dynamic being a sizeable part of season 1 and a plot point at the start of season 2, which also put the final nail in my shiping them coffin as it was very clear they were basically siblings in all but blood at this point and I wisely jumped off the ship and nuked it from orbit. But outside of Webby’s subplot with Dewey and Louie in “The Town Where Everyone Was Nice!”, it just.. hasn’t come up again. They’ve just had other dynamics to explore with the show and thus the two really haven’t interacted as much for the rest of the series thus far. They still interact, it’s just not really as a major part of any episodes plot till now. So while not a pairing I was expecting it was nice to have it back. For about ten seconds.  Yeah cards on the table this is the weakest of the three segements. While the other two have intresting settings, setups, and character dynamics we genuinely haven’t seen this one has.. a weird version of a dynamic we’ve seen done better, and an antagonist who feels oddly flat this go round. It’s just not THAT intresting despite some intresting moments but it’s best to just get into it to explain why. 

The basic setup is Webby is hoping to use bold de-ducktion to figure things out while flying under the radar while Dewey’s solution is naturally to ask everyone they meet, and then shout at Gandra when they do find the piece. This naturally gets a flashbang thrown at them, though we do get one great bit where Gandra asses their threat levels with Webby’s being high and Dewey’s being Eh, which tracks. And the thing that stings here is.. Gandra COULD’VE been an intresting opponent for Webby. While Huey and Violet, being fellow genuises as well as Huey’s personal stake in it for her hurting Fenton last year/season would be a better match, pitting Webby against someone just as focused and thought out in fighting, but who rather than use strength uses cybernetics and various gadgets would be really intresting, especially since the other two villian matchups are equally perfect. But instead.. it just feels like Gandra could’ve been replaced with a random fowl soldier. She just uses a flash grenade and some pakour, no real unique skills of hers or insight into her character or anything remotley intresting on her first Fenton-less outing just... “eh I use tech stuff because i’m the tech girl bleh”. The show can do better, and Jameela is given nothing to work with to the point I genuinely worried she’d been replaced.. she hadn’t, but it’s NEVER a good sign when you give an actor so little to do character wise I can wonder that. Also it’s a bit of a nitpick but it genuinely bothers me that Flula Borg, John Hodgman and Jason Mantzokus all got guest star credits.. but April Winchel and Jameela Jamil got nothing. And you could say April’s a long standing voice actor and all that.. but Tress Macneile also got a guest starring credit for next week’s episode solicit, so it’s clearly not that, and just comes off unintetionally sexist and obnoxious and has bothered me since the episode summaries came out. 

That out of the way the basic conflict is our heroes are flying blind, literally, with Dewey able to easily amble along, while Webby struggles as she can’t analize blind.. which comes off as bullshit to me. I HIGHLY doubt Beakly, paraoid mess she is, would not train her granddaughter to be able to fight without seeing. It’s one of the most basic training techniques in media. There’s a reason it pops up Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles a lot. To fight on instinct and with your other senses. And the instinct part is the lesson and insn’t a bad idea, it’s just the tool they use for it means they have to make Webby entirely helpless in a way that’s nonsensical to her character to make the plot work and it drags the bit down, thoguh we do get an utterly hilarious bit where Dewey mistakes a coiled white snake for a kitten. But our heroes make it through, Webby eventually saves Dewey with a leap of faith and Dewey has Webby hit a flash grenade back at Gandra which works somehow and blinds her optics despite you know.. someone who uses this kind of tech probably being smart enough to protect her own cybernetic eyes from flashbangs. But the kids have the piece.. and  a snake now even if it terrifies them. I wish one of them had taken it home a snake fits either of them and Webby’s dealt with worse.. which is the whole problem with this segment. That being said getting to see Dewey pull a hank venture and turn his normal near-suicidal reckleness into a strength was great I just with it was framed in a way that wasn’t “plannig and knowing things is stupid USE IMPULSE”. Thankfully we can move on.  Louie and Violet: The Silver Tongued Viper and The Violet Blade versus the Billion Dollar Man

Next up is Violet and Louie, a team up I didn’t expect at all but works well, and is a much better contrast. Webby and Dewey are similar enough, despite his rampant stupidity, that having a “one side teaches the other how to use something else and tap into their inner self”lesson didn’t work> Here it works perfectly: Someone who speaks frankly and seeks the truth through reason and research paired with someone whose greatest and most cherished talent is the ablility to lie and swindle. It’s a good contrast. Their headed for the underworld since, as I forgot to mention, each of the clues is framed as coming from the heavens (the first piece being on top of a statue), the underworld and the heart of the earth.

 Violet, and understandbly given her sister is magic and the general nonsense the duck family runs into, takes the underworld part literally taking an axe and some coins to pay the ferryman with her. Louie however figures it’s usually just a flowry way of putting a con..  and while he’s wrong about mythology given the ducks have met gods and the ENTIRE next episode (which likely features selene since i’ts now established they leave out guest stars if there’s more than three apparently) is about the gods they met... his instincts are not wrong and it is nice they aren’t. Sure some myths are real but sometimes a clue isn’t literal, and it’s clever that hte underworld here is the criminal underworld. 

Turns out center piece for the sword is an underground den for the criminal underworld focused around spice eating and general no goodnik shenanigans and Louie’s come prepared. In a bit of character stuff I REALLY love, Louie’s built up a rep as “The Silver Tounged Serpent”, with him bluffing that violet is his companion, having simply used a web of lies and word of mouth to build him up as the worst and most vile criminal imaginable. It’s not a bad plan and while Violet rightly points out he’ll have to live up to it eventually, and Louie naturally deflects that as “Future Louie’s” problem, not realizing in this case Future Louie is about 2 minutes from being present Louie, it’s not a bad scheme. Sure it’s risky as hell and he picked the worst place to use it.. but having an alias he can use to sneak into places like this where Scrooge would be made in an instant, and can easily come up with lies for the rest of his family minus Huey, whose useless not for being easily detectable but because he can’t lie to save his life and this very episode cements it. Most of his family is certified grade a badass, and can easily help him bluff or back up his claims or make him look like one. it’s just this time he happened to get Violet instead whose brutally honest and while badass, isn’t great at running con games nor pleased about any of this. That and Louie’s biggest weakness is forthought: While his brothers either don’t plan at all or overplan, Louie underplans: He has good ideas and good schemes and scams.. it’s just he has no real endgame for any of them and Violet sees right through that.  Still meeting the Spice Baron, played by Flula Borg who I mostly know from this song he did with Ninja Sex Party, though I also forgot he was in PItch Perfect 2...

Your welcome. But while he’d like to give our fake arch criminal his prize, someone else already offered him a literal, not figurative ton of cocaine.. I mean Gold. Got the wrong show there for a second. Unsurprisingly it’s Rockerduck whose done this and unlike the wasted opprotunity above this battle of wits is between the perfect opponents. Rockerduck is easily what Louie would become without his family: A shifty conman with a flair for lying, contacts in the criminal underworld and aversion to doing the hard work himself. He’s such a perfect opponent for Louie I don’t know why I never considered the two going head to head before, but it’s utterly fantastic. John Hodgman is also far and away the MVP of the episode guest villain wise, with some of the best lines too, my favorite being, after making a spice pun, demanding the assorted roughnecks “Laugh, LAUGH AT MY SPICE PUN”.. just the way he demands it with a mixture of karen and a whiny teenager is inspiried. But yeah, Rockerduck knowing who he’s dealing with challenges Louie to a spice duel, basically eating the hottest spices imaginable till one folds, winner takes all.  Naturally Louie’s ep included being a champion at this, and naturally his first instincts are to bail and when that fails, keep lying while Violet encourages him not to. I mean he’s ignored the pink and red angels on his shoulder telling him not to do bad things, why would the new purple one be any different. But Rockerduck has the edge as his taste buds were burned off in cryo.. though in another great line he laments he can never enjoy hard boiled eggs again. Which fair enough but.. you know two geniuses.. one of them can simulate taste buds. Regardless, Louie’s in trouble and his attempt to simply cheat his way out fails and the baron dosen’t tolerate Cheaters.. or Cheetahs.. or Cheating Cheetahs as seen in a great sight gag with a cheetah which requires the Baron to clarify it’s both. Point is Louie is screwed.. but Violet then downs all three, without a bead of sweat for reasons the episode explains at the end of this segment, but works since we don’t know violet well and the mystery of how she did it is a compelling question for a second. Our heroes have won but Rockerduck plays his trump card: that they aren’t who their saying they are.. but turns out the truth is even better than the lies Louie has, as Violet quickly spins Louie’s legend with the outright acomplishments he’s had, including defeating the bombie and defeating Scrooge’s entire Rogue’s gallery with a pen stroke.. both true. And unlike the last segement this bit of true strength feels earned: Louie’s other ablility besides lying is seeing all the angles.. and thus like Violet.. he sees the truth. He can see what a person feels, know them better than they may know themselves or the lies they might tell themselves simply through a keen eye. He can pick apart a million dollar defense system simply with a few glances as seen last episode. Louie’s lies may be useful.. but his biggest strength is inddeed his ablility to see the truth. Louie backs violet up as conquerer of the shadow realm (techincally true) and scourge of magica de spell (not even remotely true as Magica has the same problem with face blindess scrooge has with Darkwing and just Darkwing but with everyone). Rockerduck tries to complain but the crowd turns on him, our heroes escape, and Louie compliments violet. As for how she did it meditation, which fits her pefectly so I easily accept it, and a spice of the month club.. which is oddly specific but eh, this bit was really fun so i’ll give it to her. Plus her usualy steely demanor means she likely has a great poker face.. as seen by the fact sh’es soon guling a nearbye trough of water and screaming. Great.  As you can tell I liked this segment better, as it’s a clever duel that uses wit instead of strength ilke the others this episode, and forces Louie to find his real strength as his usual one backfires and really helps define Violet even more giving her a strong sense of truth, which fits her like a glove, and a nice dynamic with Louie. It was an odd pairing, but it worked wonders and brought the episode back to life after the last segment killed some of the momentum. And thankfully that momentum keeps rolling into the best segement:

Huey and Lena: Harnessing Your Inner Feral Goblin Child for the Greater Good

As you’d expect, our heroes are doing what they do best: Lena is trying to reign in a quirky nerd, and Huey is overthinking everything by trying to triangulate where the blade of the sword is. Naturally Lena just finds it as it’s embeeded in a compasss pattern on the earth, hence being part of the earth. Unsurprisingly Lena’s solution.. is to wack it free with a mallet... you know there’s a reson she’s one of my favorites and it’s nice to see two of my faviorites who haven’t interacted hardly at all have some time together. Naturally Huey objects to destroying the thing they came for and figures out how to remove it using the clues. Unfortunately for him, but happily for me, Steelbeak is back! 

I missed this feral asshole, and Jason while not getting a ton of lines sadly, does make the best of what he has, and is used less as himself on purpose. Also while he’s still kind of a moron, as I mentioned in my Tiff of the Titans review, this version is still CLEVER. He may not be book smart, but he can think on his feet and come up with plans and here.. his plan was the best of the three we’ve seen: Just wait for the ducks to come by and solve it for him and then beat them up and take it or as he puts it “Not the first time a nerd did my homework for me. “ Dumb dosen’t always mean incompetent, and he still has his classic self’s easy sense of planning.  Had Lena not been there he would’ve won his piece and been the ONLY member of his group to do so. But Lena is there and now fully trained, so she stops steelbeak by freezing time, Za Warudo! style. Though unlike DIO she can’t manipulate anything, or go get a steam roller though given her powers she can probably make something into one, so tha’ts still on the table. She instead enters someone’s mindscape and uses that to freeze time for a bit.. how .. I have no idea, but it’s an interesting concept and the white look of the void their in now is neat, with only steelbeak himself present in a black and white negative of himself.  Huey takes this as time to plan indeiftely till he finds one that works, shooting down actually fighting Steelbeak as “a cowardly brute’s way out”. We then get a great montage as Huey tries everything, from reasoning, to barganing, to crying, to a TON of hilarious and obviously ineffectual disgusies, to lying.. which as you’d expect is simply holding the massive sword blade behind his back and going “what sword.” It’s a really great montage that shows off two things: Danny Pudi’s talent, and that Huey.. can’t reason or trick his way out of this. He can’t plan his way out. And that’s why Steelbeak is the perfect foe to put him up against: Unlike Webby who faced something she could understand and Louie, who simply faced his evil counterpart, Huey faces his exact oppsotie: Huey thrives on logic and as we soon learns bury’s his emotions and impulses and dosen’t fight unless he HAS TO and even then it’s usually in a group. Steelbeak.. is a dumb, impulsive, thug who thinks out his plans on the fly, if at all, laughs at logic, and thinks the best solution to everything is punch it or blow it up. He can’t be reasoned with, Huey isn’t good enough at deception to trick him, and outrunning him was the first thing Huey tried and failed miserably. Steelbeak is made of huey’s blind spot, his inablaity to act without thinking. And he can’t fight it. 

While Lena’s humored him despite her annoyance with Huey’s stubborness, she finally breaks and tries to force him to admit he has to brute force his way out, with Huey refusing.. but his refusal brings out a door to “the duke of making a mess”. Naturally something this ominous and personal, and the fact they have no other options and she wants to prove a point, is catnip to Lena who lets the king out.. who turns out to be what you’d get if Bart Simpson’s evil deformed twin Hugo and the messed up Dipper Clone from Gravity Falls did a fusion dance. While also in a nice nod looking VERY similar, with his broad fangs and red eyes, to the evil version of mickey from runaway brain. It’s also somehow the SECOND TIME i’ve seen a child supress his negative emotions to the point they manifested into a person shoved deep inside our hero’s head. Lena naturally loves this feral goblin who Huey explains as all his impulses and emotoins, his spur of the moemnt ones anyway, funneled into one being so he can use logic and only logic.  So basically.. Huey is bruce banner.. get.. this kid.. some therapy. 

Point is Huey dosen’t want to embrace his wild side, while Lena points out he needs to, and that sh’es learned from experince being a part of ones self someone ignored entirely as Magica’s shadow he can’t just ignore this and hope it goes away. And given Bruce Banner eventually got several more split personalities which turn into hulking rage monsters, which are a sadist with a good core, a raging child and a las vega leg breaker, and that KO repressing TKO just lead to his other half killing everything he loved and only getting that snapped back thanks to god himself... yeah maybe Lena’s right. And this really brilliantly plays into Lena’s development: Her past two episodes have been entirely about her solving a problem, her nightmares and her wondering magic, that she’s been running from by facing it. She’s learned by now you can’t just ignore something and expect it to go away. Again, that’s how you get Hulks. You have to face your sometimes literal demons and yourself to get better and make things better. And now she’s learned that, it’s Huey’s turn. His entire problem has been that he functions entirely on reason and when reason can’t work, he falls apart. It’s something I honed in on last week and has come up again. The point Lena, and the episode, is making with this bit is that sometimes you just have to trust yourself and go with your gut.  Huey, reluctnatly lets the duke out who goes Donald on Steelbeak... seriously while the big team shot of the cousins and triplets at the end of season 2 showed Huey as Fethry.. he’s easily the most Donald of the group. He’s considerate, romantic, seriously the date he set up for Fenton really was sweet and Violet is in for some very nice evenings.. but also stubborn, prone to mental breakdowns, badly needs therapy (which donald IS getting so there’s hope), and when angry is a demon sent straight from hell. I REALLY hope this gets pointed out at some point.  However without focus the Duke is useless so Lena convinces Huey that he needs to not fight the duke as some evil demonic part of him but accept him: USE his rationality and strategy with his more violent and angry impulses. The two reunite with a hand shake, seriously i’m getting so many KO and TKO vibes this episode what the actual hell, and thei rmerged self easily beats steelbeak witha  wedgie and tied shoelaces. It’s beautiful to see and Lena is brought to tears.  Before we get to the finale, this was EASILY the best segment, using Lena’s character growth to faciltiate Huey’s that’s been going on all season: making him see he needs to step out of his comfort zone of logic and accept his own inner strenght, his complete self, to really function. It’s good well done stuff and the setting is really intresting.  THE FINALE: You are my Inner Strength

So naturally all the parts come together as Scrooge and Heron’s fight lands near Huey and Lena with Webby, Dewey, Violet and Louie all showing up soon after. Scrooge in a really nice moment is  utterly proud of the kids, having had the utmost faith in them to get the pieces, and having his faith validated. He may be a cynical, sometimes assholish, old man.. but he loves and believes in his kids and future kids in law, he trusts them more than himself and he’s come far enough to not doubt them when he needs them most. FOWL however has regrouped, and Scrooge.. just gives them the assembled sword. Unsurprisingly, if still awesomely this is a ploy: Heron tries using the sword.. but it flies out of her hand and into Scrooges. He out gambited them. Also getting JoJo’s Bizzare Adventure vibes this episode with all the planning and counter planning and I am loving it. As he explains the sword reponds to true inner strength,  while heron is all surface level: All malice and schemes and nothing beneath her character, as are the others. There 3 dimensional characters.. but their all pretty open with who they are and not really open to introspection, where as our heroes are and thus grew.. and Scrooge already knows his inner strength: The kids. THey helped him  become a better person, all of them except violet and she just joined the family give her time. They’ve all helped him let his walls down and let people in again after the tragedy of della destroyed him emotionally and put the walls up thick, with Lena being the one to finally get him to destroy them for good. They’ve all helped him be better and he’s helped them all be better in turn, giving them a live of adventure where there their best selves and becoming great kids who will become incredible adults. Their love for one another is what drives them. And thus activates the sword. FOWL seemingly decides to just book and our heroes have won.  Scrooge rewards his kids, new additons included, with some street meat cut byt he sword, and we get nice little shots of the lessons having sunk in with Huey knawing into his like a rabid wolf and Dewey and Webby sharing theirs blindly i’ts a sweet conclusion to a fun episode. But given we’re in the thick of the story arc now, FOWL naturally didn’t just book it for no reason.. this was all a setup. Heron calls back to Bradford with a mission accomplished and a lock of scrooge’s feathers. 

It’s genuinely impressive as there’s no way F.O.W.L. can loose here: They win the sword.. and they have both the feathers for whatever nightmare they have planned for the Ducks, and another Missing Mystery for their grand scheme. They loose.. and they likely already have a plan to get any mysteries the ducks gather, just like last time, and they still get what they want. Either way Scrooge and the audience are unaware of the real plan, and FOWL is still ahead. 

Dew-abolical! 

Final Thoughts for the Episode as a Whole:

While a bit weaker than the last two weeks, and almost entirely thanks to the first segment, this episode is still a fun ride and a great way to kick things off now the ducks and F.O.W.L. are both on the offensive. It was also a great way to bring the Saberwing Sisters back and give them some fresh dynamics outside of Webby for a change, bring back some old faviorite vilians and in general pack a fun, Barks and Rosa style adventure story into the myth arc while still dripping with the character progression and dynamics this show lives for. One dark spot aside this really is a great episode, and the other two segements are clever and fun enough to easily ignore that. This season continues to be the show at it’s absolute peak doing what it’s always done best: taking the past and making something fantastic with it.  Next Week: The kids, sadly minus my girls, audition to replace Zeus! Horay! Finally Zeus got MeTooed! It took long enough.. I mean they wrote entire sonets about his sex crimes. This isn’t a Bill Cosby situation where it suprised the general public, no one liked him since greek times to begin with. Also DAISY RETURNS! Horay! And so does the incredible storkules, MASTER OF COCKBLOCKING!  Also Horay! Seriously unlike the last two blocks of episodes there’s not a one i’m not excited about in the bunch.  Until then you can check my blogs for more reviews, and I plan to do the first episode this month and adjust my patreon rewards accordingly. You can follow said patreon at pateron dot com/popculturebuffet, comission reviews of other ducktales or cartoon episodes for 5 dollars an episode by shooting me an ask or message on here, and get out and vote tomorrow.. that’s not related to me but given how crucial this election is. Do it get out and vote. Until we meet again it’s been a pleasure.