#and tripp never felt the same way?????

[florida3exclamationpoints]

Bro did I ever tell yall my mom hates fitzsimmons as a couple 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

[garciafamlover500]

Javier Garcia HC's because why not? (Some things are most likely OOC)

Bisexual (Canon), Transmasc and Polyamorous (both HC).

Autistic + hard of hearing (My man shot a gun right beside the same ear TWICE)

Dating tripp and jesus (Tall, big muscles, beards, this man definitely has a type-)

Cat person all the way, can and will adopt any stray cat he sees

He has a massive sweet tooth and his favorite dessert is pudding. But he also loves latino cuisine with his favorites being nachos, Ropa Vieja, Arroz con pollo and Tamales

Can't cook for shit, never let him inside the kitchen

Lets clem and mariana paint his nails, and sometimes he even lets them doll up his face a little

One time, he lost a bet to tripp and conrad during a game and had to wear a dress for the entire day. At first he felt embarrassed as hell, but as time went by he actually grew to enjoy wearing it, heck some people (including david surprisingly) actually complimented him about it! Needless to say, this was when javi realized he was GNC

(Pre transition) Javi used to bind with ace bandages for awhile because he didn’t have enough money to buy a proper binder until David bought one for him

Started taking HRT when he was 16

Hates hot weather and prefers the cold, he loves snuggling up by the fireplace while drinking a nice cup of hot chocolate with his two giant boyfriends

used to hate his freckles because when he was younger some asshole kid called them ugly. However, after a little reassurance from david he started to grow fond of them. Tripp and jesus love planting small kisses on them whenever they get the chance

Had an emo phase when he was in middle school

Has a tooth gap

Taught gabe and mariana how to play baseball when they were little

Infodumps about baseball A LOT, stims in multiple different ways, and whenever he feels overstimulated mariana would usually lend him her headphones and tape player so he could cool off for awhile

Since he’s HOH, they’ll be times when he has difficulty hearing certain things, so he communicates through sign language sometimes

He also uses sign language to communicate whenever he feels over/under-stimulated, this is due to him going nonverbal when overwhelmed or underwhelmed

Does NOT fully forgive Eleanor, and probably won’t be anytime soon

GARCIA BROTHERLY FLUFF TIME!

He and David are slowly staring to rekindle their relationship, they’ll be times when they meet up on one of the rooftops of one of Richmond’s buildings at night and just talk about random stuff, be it from current events or past memories, while staring up at the stars and enjoying each other’s company

One time, some random douchebag kept bothering javi about his past with gambling, and David just walked up to the guy and fucking decks him in the jaw

David tended to tease javi from time to time whenever javi would gush about Jesus and Tripp. And when javi announced he was dating them, David couldn’t help but feel a little overprotective

He and David would speak spanish when having a conversation somtimes

David was the classic older brother when they were growing up: Pranking javi, putting things out of reach for him, calling dibs on everything first, you name it!

I HC that David was actually pretty good at baseball as a kid, that’s one reason why javi really got into it as well

David was the first person javi came out to as trans, bi AND neurodivergent

After the whole new frontier fiasco, David started to have nightmares about nearly killing javi back at the water tower and would wake up screaming his name with tears in his eye. One night javi caught him having one of these nightmares and when he was able to wake him up, David just broke down in his embrace while apologizing over and over again and javi would just hold him and encouraged him to let it all out.

(possible part 2! Let me know what yall think)

[pastelwitchling]

Hello darling! Trip Manes is a huge wasted opportunity (like so much else on this show) and it's just awful that they never brought him up again after S2. Would you write anything about Alex and Michael learning more about him and Alex really getting to connect to his memory more?

***

                Michael came home one day to find the house empty, and wondered if Alex was still at Deep Sky. His shoulders fell and he tried not to get disappointed, but he often made an effort to come home later than Alex if only to have the comfort of seeing his husband to look forward to.

                But the lights were on and it wasn’t like Alex to leave them like that. So before he started to panic, he dialed his number and waited. He’s fine, he thought. He’s fine, stop overreacting, he’s totally fine.

                Then he heard Alex’s familiar ringtone. Coming from inside the house. He frowned.

                “Hubby?” he called into the hallway.

                “In here,” Alex called back, and Michael followed the sound to their bedroom where Alex was sitting on the ground at the foot of their bed, knees pulled up to his chin as a chest sat open at his side. He was smiling fondly at a journal in his hands, his dark eyes warm and a mixture of the earth, the grass, the sun in the warm lamplight.

                Michael leaned a shoulder against the doorframe, hands in his pockets, admiring the sight before him.

                “Hey, beautiful.”

                Alex’s smile widened and he glanced up at him, scooching aside on the carpet in response so Michael could sit.

                “What’re you looking at?”

                Alex held out the journal for Michael to see an unfamiliar scrawl, though he definitely recognized the wording. “I forgot that I had Tripp’s stuff in here, and I don’t know why I started looking through it again, but . . .” he shrugged a shoulder, “I don’t know, I guess I thought I would find something I didn’t last time.”

                Michael considered him, the way his eyes ran over Tripp’s writing again and again, like he could almost remember meeting the man who’d written them. He needs this, Michael knew. Ever since Tripp’s name had been cleared, Alex had needed to know he wasn’t the only one that cared in that damn family. He needed to know there was someone else that had tried so hard.

                So Michael scooted close until his knee was bumping against Alex’s, kissed his cheek, and asked, “And?”

                Alex’s smile softened and his eyes turned sad. “And I really wish I could’ve met him.” He sighed, and shut his eyes. “So much could’ve been different.”

                Alex had said the same thing before, and Michael had said nothing at the time. He never stopped regretting it, those little moments and dark words that Alex had let slip, the need he’d felt, and how Michael had stepped away and ignored Alex’s pain because what could he say? How much had he been allowed to say?

                If he’d said what he’d wanted to say, if he’d done what he’d wanted to do, there would’ve been no question who he loved. Who he could only ever love. And he hadn’t been sure it was what Alex had wanted at the time.

                Now was different. Now, he was allowed to pull Alex in close and kiss his temple, his ear, his cheek. “I know he would’ve loved to meet you, too.”

                Alex rested his head on his shoulder, leaning into him and sighing what Michael knew must’ve been his first deep breath of the day.

                “I guess we do have a lot in common,” he grinned. “We both fell in love with an alien.”

                “Great taste,” Michael agreed, and Alex burst into laughter, hugging Michael’s waist.

                “I’ll start dinner right now,” he said, moving to stand. “What’re you in the mood for?”

                Michael hummed, and yanked on Alex’s arm, pulling him onto his lap with a gasp. “That’s a dangerous question,” he said, running his hands up Alex’s thighs, his hips, up to his waist. “Here . . .” he murmured, and stood, carrying Alex with him, using his powers to wrap Alex’s leg around his waist. “Why don’t you let me worry about dinner? Later.”

                He laid him down on the bed, between his legs, their hips grinding together, and Alex’s eyes fluttered. “Can’t it wait till after?” he breathed, even as he grabbed fistfuls of Michael’s shirt at his waist, as if eager to feel his skin underneath.

                And Michael smirked against Alex’s jaw. No, he thought, it can’t.

                I don’t want you to grieve anymore when I could make you smile instead.

                I don’t want you to hurt when I could make you feel good.

                I don’t want your heart to break over what you could’ve had and what you’ve lost when I could remind you every waking moment, like I’ve always wanted, how much love you have.

                But he didn’t say any of that. Not now anyway. Instead, what he said out loud was, “I’m not waiting another second to love you, Manes.”

***

Well, anon, much like the rest of the interesting plot points on the show, I imagine the creative process went a little something like, "Hey, that's a neat idea. Let's not do anything with it."

Happy malex Monday ❤

[beansoup3000]

Hell Bent Spoilers!! Very many of them

Okay, so the characters! I am a character driven reader and Miss Bardugo always delivers on character-driven plots. I was initially disappointed with Hell Bent because I felt that the breakneck pace wasn't allowing room for the deepening of characters that I was expecting (I had definitely formed some expectations based on the trajectory of SoC and CK and how CK comes with more backstory and development for almost everyone). But I think that we did get more insight into our main cast--it just happened as part of The Horrors that were plaguing them. Not-Hellie and Not-Blake and the others were really clever ways to maintain the action but add some emotional torment and give us some insight into these characters' worst thoughts about themselves.

I was absolutely broken by Not-Hellie's haunting of Alex and her flashback to Babbit Rabbit. Alex wants to be a protector of innocents. She might scoff at that if you said it to her outright, but she has the tendency. She carries a righteous anger against people who prey on the weak and the societally vulnerable. It is her self-identification with Tara and her anger at how easily she was disposed of that leads her to investigate Tara's murder. The same righteous anger shows up when she defeats Belbalm and extracts the souls of her victims. So to see her wracked with guilt about all the innocent people who have died "because of her" destroyed me. We see that there's a part of her that believes that she is just like Belbalm: selfish, willing to leave a trail of innocents in her wake to survive. We also have further variations on the theme of Alex Is Not A Good Person; when Mercy learns about Alex's murderous past and her lack of regret she does not offer absolution. Golgarot wants to take her soul in exchange for Darlington's because unlike Darlington, she belongs in hell. The first time I cried in Hell Bent was this sequence: the Babbit Rabbit flashback followed by what initially looks like Alex offering up her soul because she, too, believes that she deserves this. She deserves it not because of her five kills at Ground Zero, but because of the one that she didn't kill. Because of Babbit Rabbit, because of Hellie, because of Darlington. Because she fails to protect the innocents, and in the wake of her failure they are doomed. I let you die. To save myself, I let you die. That is the danger of keeping company with survivors.

But that isn't what happens. Alex is not offering up her soul and she never planned to. Because that's the other key to Alex's character: And wasn't that the worst of it? she did. She did want to live and always had . . . I want to survive this world that keeps trying to destroy me. Alex is desperate, Alex is stubborn, Alex has lived most of her life subject to the power of evil men who try to manipulate her understanding of herself and her place in the world (Len, Eitan, Sandow...). Her power is her rejection of those narratives and her stubborn, stubborn survival. Instead of giving in to the guilt of those that she could not save, instead of accepting her place in hell, she offers Eitan's soul. She saves herself and her friends. There's something so deeply meaningful to me about Alex's persistence. That's really all I have to say about it.

I also meant to write about Dawes and Turner and Tripp and Michelle and Darlington, but Alex stole the show as she always does for me. I will say that Alex and Darlington's new dynamic is fantastic. Leigh really wasn't joking when she said slow burn, huh? We'll just have to subsist on Alex calling Darlington her gentleman demon for the next few years. I would also like to note that as soon as Dawes said that to descend into hell they would need a soldier, scholar, priest and prince I knew that Alex would be the soldier and Dawes the scholar.

[asher-finch]

— INTRODUCING: asher finch.

felix mallard & he/him / cisman ‷ watch out , asher finch has crash-landed into roswell !! they look twenty-six years old and celebrate their birthday on the twenty-second of april. they are from roswell, new mexico, reside in tripp's trailer park and are currently working as a clerk at galactica gift shop and bartender at the wild pony. one thing you should know about them is that he actually can lick his own elbow and has worked hard on that skill.‷ 

The Basics.

Full Name: Asher Finch Face Claim: Felix Mallard Pronouns and Gender: cisman (he/him) Birthday and Age: April 22nd, 1996 (26) Zodiac: taurus ☉ cancer ☽ sagittarius ➶ Hometown: Roswell, NM How long have they been living there? All his life. Sexuality: fluid Neighborhood: Tripp's Trailer Park Occupation: Clerk at Galactica Gift Shop & Bartender at the Wild Pony Family: Edward "Eddy" Finch (father), Isabella "Bella" Finch (mother)

The Personality.

Asher is the definition of a slacker. He's a small town boy through and through who still hangs around the same places and hideouts as he did when he was a kid. He's someone who never really had any greater ambitions other than getting some deadbeat job so he could have enough money to buy booze and weed for his friends and him and just have a good time. He barely made it through high school, not because he's not smart enough but simply because he hated the system he was put in and never bothered to study properly. However, he does like to read, to skate, to just hang out and doesn't mind the fact that every now and then he has to work - aka do the bare minimum to not get fired. Asher often pretends he doesn't really care much about anything yet, deep down, he cares about the people close to him but has a hard time showing them or letting them know without turning it into a joke.

The Biography.

trigger warnings: mentions of child neglect, alcohol and drug use

born and raised in roswell, new mexico, for generations, the finches weren't exactly known as the most stable or white picket fence kind of family

eddy and bella had come from rather humble beginnings themselves, sweethearts who'd met in kindergarten and got engaged through buying each other ring pops while getting high together but ended up with a kid they didn't have the resources to care for way too early into their young life

being raised by two adults who were still kids essentially, paved the way for asher who, while loved to the moon and back, had never really known what it meant to grow up and take responsibility

he was a latchkey kid, left to his own devices more often than not while his parents stayed out late at a local bar but nonetheless, he felt like he had everything he needed, not knowing what he was missing

but the young pair tried their best to raise their son, not always succeeding but doing what they could and while asher always had a loving parent and a roof over his head, he lacked one thing - guidance

he never believed in rolemodels and he's still under the impression that he never needed any to begin with but following into the long gone finches' footsteps, he found himself in a life with little to no rules but a rather hedonistic approach

school was mainly a way to occupy himself, a reason to stay out and let his old folks sleep well into noon but frankly, he was never really good at it, mostly because he got bored and sidetracked easily

he'd rather skip school with friends and hang out in empty parking lots way past his curfew (but who checked really?), learning new tricks on his skateboard and smoking behind abandoned houses

now, years later, he works at the local gift shop, mostly because he gets to hang out there and talk shit about tourists

he by no means works hard enough to run himself into the ground but just enough to not get fired which to him is more than enough

he now lives in a small trailer near his parents' that he fixed up with a little help from his friends and is a plant boi™️ (do they die because he gets sidetracked and forgets to water them? absolutely but he's trying!!)

to most, he looks a little mean and will roll his eyes at most people to mark his territory but he's really just very chill and usually vibing either on his own or with friends

asher is and aways has been an outdoorsy type of guy and loves every kind of activity you can do in nature as in lay around in meadows playing card games or skating/biking around town

like a bunch of other kids around town, he doesn't really know what he wants to do in life but he's working on it

he's interested in a bunch of things but also has the attitude that things are fine the way they are and he makes enough money to live comfortably (for him) so it's all good and he'll likely just continue as it was since it has never broke badly for him

The Connections.

childhood/high school friends

neighbors/fellow trailer park residents

fellow latchkey kids that he hung out with either after or during school hours (oops)

coworkers

drinking/smoking buddies

skate buddies

anything and everything really

[rawrmeansilyindinosawr]

we ate chuletas on the floor of ur apartment when it still smelled like paint

and the first nite we spent there we slept with the mattress upside down. the movers installed it all wrong and it hurt our back so much n we both tossed and turned til we figured out why. ur windows faced the street and that made it hard to sleep. youd use a wooden stick to lock your window before we went out. it was a fixer upper, that apartment. someone had just died in there a month before you moved in and we joked we’d have to sage the place and hire a shaman. that week, we polished the bathtub together. it would take two days to dry. And when it finally did u ran us a bath ,measuring the water level so perfectly to accommodate our body weight. in the tub , we always sat across from one another and talked about what we ate that day or i sat in front of u in silence, against ur chest, soundly in ur arms. when u got that apt i called you crying one morning cuz i felt so alone, i was used to u being in mine and you came the same night to cook me 'reassurance rice'; arroz con gandules (rice with pigeon peas). those were the nights that u stayed up crying on ketamine cuz you told me you were afraid of getting alzheimers and forgetting about me. those were the nights that we would sit in my room and eat chicken wings and i'd save you all the drumsticks. those were the nights we dreamed about california together, the pacific coast highway, how youd teach me how to drive stick shift.

when you got that apartment , you packed your things within the timeframe that i was able to finish drinking an iced milk tea. you threw your clothes out of the third story window from that stupid shelter. the first time i snuck in there with you we ordered crab burgers and coca cola and you fingered me with one hand and covered my mouth with the other. you didn’t have a door, or a curtain. we shared a twin sized mattress and every time i went into the bathroom you had to follow me in case anyone caught me there with you. in the morning i ran out of the stairwell,dodging cameras, past security, towards the train station. you told me that you never thought i'd do that with you. but i liked challenging your beliefs of my boundaries. i let you take them all. and that was our love. all consuming. wrote you a poem about how i wanted you more like an enemy cuz i wanted u closer than just friends. u didn’t get it. but u liked to find the deeper meanings in my irony and i liked that you took all the time to decipher me. <we took molly on our first anniversary. we were at a concert and couldn’t keep our hands off of each other so we only stayed for only one song . you bought me a tripp skirt. i tried it on for you and twirled around for you in it. you cut it 3 inches shorter just so you could see my legs better.> one morning in may U brushed the knots out of my hair before i had to go to work and told me u were shocked i didn’t know what was going on back there. those may days were days that id sing to you love songs like bon iver's blood bank.

U apologized for ur many moods, u said it was the full moon. made u a zine called “loving a trans boy” after the first time u asked me to inject ur T shots for you. u told me no one loved you the way i loved u. At the end of june, u told me to leave u alone , to never ever talk to u. when the night prior to that we were trading hits off of a pipe, ur room smelled like filthy grime. it was all yellow. it was all yellow and we were so high. taking turns with our heads in between each others legs, we never made it to the bed. we told each other that we'd inject heroine into each others veins n we kept repeating that we loved each other over and over and over again like it was going to be the last time we were going to be together again or ever see the sun and maybe just maybe the world could collapse any second and just be done so we had to say it. and i promised you that i would be happy for you to be the last person i would ever say i love you too and you said that you've heard all of those things before, that u used to think like that too . but it just wouldnt b true.

i wish someone would have told me that letting go isn't just a one time thing. i wish someone would have told me that letting go isn't just demographically 7-8 times. i wish someone would have told me it actually is a thousand times. because i choose to let you go when i brush past your favorite food in the grocery store and decide not to pick it up. i let you go when i decide to still make my own cup of coffee in the morning, hazelnut creamer and whipped cream. i let you go when i decide that the 4th time will be the last time that i take your clothes to buffalo exchange. i let you go when i walk down the street near your job and decide to take a different route. i let you go when i decide to fuck someone new. i let you go when i decide to take your side of the bed. i let you go when i decide to stop hating the extra space. i let you go when i decide to take up all the extra space. i let you go when i stop asking why. i let you go when i acknowledge i still miss you but i decide no i dont want u back. i let you go when i decide to let you become a memory. like how we ate chuletas on the floor of ur apartment when it still smelled like paint. and how the first night we spent there we slept with the mattress upside down and it was so hard to sleep, and how ur bathtub wasn’t polished yet and how itd take two days……

[jeremy-ken-anderson]

Nobody Knows Anybody

Smoke was still rising from the crashed hovercar.

"People are really dumb about words, Tripp."

Officer Tripp felt a little out of his depth when talking to Oswell. Just, like, consistently. So this moment wasn't any more off-putting than when Oswell had raised a hand, as if to ask his turn to speak, and this had magically caused Renner to twist his steering wheel and lose control of his vehicle. Wasn't much less off-putting, either. He was still treading water, as it were. "Sir?"

"He spent how long monologuing at me about how nobody knows anybody? How you can never truly know a man? But here we are."

Here, indeed, they were. "I guess you showed him, sir."

"Not the point. Or only half, at best." Oswell waved off Tripp's appreciation with a hand. "The thing he misunderstood is what his own sentence meant to him."

"I." Tripp turned this over in his head a couple times. Nope. Still nothing. He started to shuffle his way down toward the ditch the hovercar had ended up in, hand moving to his sidearm. "I don't think I follow." Renner was unconscious.

"He thought not knowing him meant his mind was untouchable. But there's knowing like a god would know someone - being able to taste and comprehend every aspect of a person's life - and there's knowing someone well enough to guess if they've got the same kind of stupid tics in their behavior as practically everyone. Read history and you know what you'll find out?"

"What happened before?"

This got an approving nod. Tripp was pleased; Oswell didn't hand those out willy-nilly. "Yes. Also, you'll find out that people have always just kind of been people. Nobody knows anybody, but also, anybody who's paying attention kind of knows everybody. It's not hard."

"For you, mayb-" Tripp started, sullenly.

"Down!" Oswell suddenly tackled Tripp, as the horrifying br-r-ak of Renner's firearm sprayed white-hot death where Tripp had just been standing. Apparently Renner was not unconscous.

On his side and from his hip, Tripp fired off a barrage of his own, the plasma leaving clean, perfectly circular orange-glowing holes in the vehicle, the nearby dirt, and Renner.

"Damn it!" said Oswell. "I was really hoping we could question him."

"You saved my life," Tripp said numbly. "Again."

"And you mine, this time. Fine shooting. We'll call it a wash." Tripp could hear a bit of shakiness in Oswell's voice. He wasn't used to it.

Was Oswell just hopped up on the adrenaline of being shot at? Was he upset he'd misjudged Renner's level of fervor? Was he surprised at himself for risking his life to save Tripp?

Tripp didn't know. All this time with Oswell, and he didn't know him at all. And that was fine.

"Let's get some coffee. You're going to want to go through your notes, and firing my sidearm means I'll be filling out paperwork for the next couple hours."

Oswell smiled. "See? You know me plenty."

[jroycethethird]

“I…” He opened his mouth to speak, but nothing could come out. For a moment his jaw bobbed, as though he were attempting words but did not know how to properly form them. Tripp had wanted to say he asked her, that he had consulted with her and they came to the conclusion together… but as he thought back on it, he knew it wasn’t true. How many times so far had he placed a hand on her shoulder and simply said, “You’re not doing this one.” Apparently a couple times now, and he was likely to keep doing it as the games continued. He simply told her that she wasn’t to go out there and participate. In his heart it was all well intentioned — mental images of Cece fallen and hurt, bloodied and bruised, crossed his mind as the trust falls were announced. He knew how their family was viewed around town. He knew how he was viewed. It was the curse of telepathy, the knowing what crossed people’s minds when they saw him. He worried that their association would taint others’ view of the most wonderful person he’d ever known, that her carrying their cursed last name was enough for others to write her off. The fear that someone would let her fall, that an injury could have been sustained that harmed her greatly that she couldn’t just “walk off”, had him pulling her aside and demanding she not participate. The same went for dodgeball, another mental image of Cece being tackled down by hundreds of balls, thrown with such force, scared him to the point of once more directing her to the sidelines. And now looking back on it, he saw he didn’t give her a moment to decide for herself. Jaw tightening, he glanced away, half ashamed and half irritated by this overall argument. Part of him understood her, but another part felt she was taking this out of proportion. He was trying to protect her — couldn’t she see where his heart had been?

Before he could respond properly, she began speaking of their parents and how they had made all the choices for her. In truth, he wasn’t around much in her childhood. The nine year difference between them meant that he had been off at boarding school when Cece was first born, only having met her during spring break when their father permitted him to come home for a visit. Most of her childhood he’d only seen her during summers, or when he’d done well enough for JR to allow him home for holidays. Then he went to school in England and he hadn’t come home really until after graduation, and with a wife on his arm. She was already a preteen then, on her way to becoming a young lady. He’d missed so much of her life, continued to while being a devoted husband and business owner. Did he ever truly understand her plight or how overbearing their parents were on her? He wasn’t around much to really see, and he cringed internally at it. He should have known, he should have been more empathetic. They were from the same stock, after all. At least partially. He should have known how overbearing their parents were, and how much like them he was when he made decisions for her. Just like their wretched father, enacting his will upon them and forcing them in like the way he wanted. JR would pull her out of things no question, tell Cece what she couldn’t and couldn’t do — what she wasn’t capable of. He felt sick realizing he had been no different, and over inconsequential games no less. Disgusting, he thought, that this apple did not fall far from the tree and had a bit of the rot within.

After a beat, he let out a silent sigh, setting the ice pack aside. He turned his whole body then, straddling the bench they were on to fully face her. Then carefully, debating for the smallest moment whether he should before ultimately doing so, Tripp took a hold of Cece’s hand. “I do support you,” he said quietly, “And I’m very sorry if I made you feel or think otherwise. That was never my intention. I see now that maybe it was pigheaded of me… But I wasn’t here to truly see your struggles for all those years, and even when I was around I had always been occupied with other things to truly see how limited father and mother made you feel. Whether it was with work, the Coven… Eliza.” It felt weird, foreign, to say his ex-wife’s name out loud. Like he hadn’t voiced it in so long. His tongue felt fuzzy, but he pushed on, “I’ve seen you at such random spurts… it’s often hard to reconcile the woman you have become with the little baby I held for the briefest moment before going back to school all those years ago. Or the little girl greeting me when I’d come home for summer vacation between semesters, the little miss of Verdant Vale Hall when I graduated and officially came home for good.” He smiled fondly at the memories.

“I know it’s terribly unfair, but you will always be someone I will want to protect to the fullest of my capabilities. And that can cloud my judgement. I didn’t see it as taking a choice from you, I saw it as the only way to ensure you’d be okay. I’m sorry if I took your agency from you, Cece. I promise I wasn’t trying to hurt your feelings intentionally. I just…” His mouth twisted sourly, his eyes softening as he whispered, “…I don’t want to ever see you hurt.” His gaze briefly flickered to Altan, the memory of what had happened to him moments ago when the game came to an end at the hands of one of the banshees filled his mind. “Some people can be volatile and act without hesitation, or concern for other’s well being, sometimes out of impulse and wrought emotions,” he said, considering the moment that had passed after the game, “and I am prone to expect the absolute worst in others.” He expected it… Because he could be the worst of people. Tripp knew this, knew his greatest flaws. Self serving, too cunning and ambitious for his own good, callous when he wanted to be. He would inevitably disappoint, he’d always proven it. Even to those who mattered most to him. “That clearly doesn’t excuse me… But you are one of the few I deeply, truly care for in this world. I didn’t know how else to approach it. I assumed you would feel better off not participating, didn’t think it needed to be discussed. I didn’t realize it would affect you so. But I see that I was wrong, and for that I sincerely apologize.” Squeezing her hand gently, he gave Cece a small but guilty smile, “Can you find it in you to forgive me?” She was perhaps the only person he could ever truly be apologetic to, knowing full well it would upend him if she didn’t forgive him his folly. “I promise I won’t stand in your way of participating again, in this retreat or in anything else that comes in the future. I will let you make the choice, and I’ll support your decision… Even if it means swallowing my own fears and concerns for you. You are capable, I know this. I don’t want you to think I don’t believe in you.”

The was Tripp looked out at the gym, where others were starting to trickle out after the dodge ball game ended, Cece wanted to scream. She knew what he was thinking. They were in public, they were unable to engage in such a tiff just in case someone were to take note of it. God forbid comment on it, and it somehow get back to their parents. And of course the moment the idea passed through her head, Cece tried to relax herself and act as though she were not mere seconds away from storming out and walking home to have some time to calm down.

She understood why he wanted her to sit out. She was aware of her illness and all the prolonged effect it had on her body. She knew she was more prone to breaks and bruises and bleeding then the average person, but that did not mean she should simply sit out of every experience that could harm her. She had done that for nearly ten years of her life, and she was sick of it. Taking a deep breathe in an attempt to compose herself, Cece tried not to allow any tears to fall. Although she could feel the warm prickle behind her eyes. "Tripp, I will always appreciate you're willingness to protect me. But that is not what is upsetting me. What is upsetting is that you decided for me, that I would not be participating. You did not ask me. You did not advise me. You simply made the decision for me, and that is what hurts. And has me so furious."

Perhaps it had been her fault for assuming he'd understand how this would feel to her. How once more the people in her life were taking away her choice and deciding for her. But she had always felt the closest to Tripp, out of everyone in their house, so of course she had assumed he would have been able to see what this was all about. "I could give a damn if these events are fun or boring or anything in between. What I care about is my choice to entertain them was taken from me. Just like everything else in my childhood, someone else decided what I was going to do. I am no longer that sickly child, Tripp. I want to experience everything life has to offer. Even if that means falling into the hands of our neighbors." Her voice had started to get higher as she got worked up, so she attempted to steady herself once more. "I still have so many things I can not do, because mother and father would not approve. All I am asking is that you do not make my decisions for me as well. You are my big brother and I would just like to feel supported by you. You're the only one in this family I can turn to for that." Her parents would always be her parents. And her relationship with Kathy was not as strong as she had hoped it would be. But Tripp had always made her believe in herself. That's all she wanted.

[spaceskam]

woke me up from the longest dream

Summary: Alex and Michael follow up on a lead and find something powerful.

Tags: canon compliant (for the most part), visions, road trips, my deep sky still sucks agenda

ao3

"Why is it so fucking cold?" 

"Welcome to Montana," Alex said dryly.

Michael made a face and shoved his hands in his pockets. He was doing his best to be mature about Alex inviting him on this trip. It was another loose lead he found and he was irritated that he didn't find it until after he came back home. Michael had offered to help after a grueling time in self-induced misery and Alex had agreed and he had planned to use this time to show Alex how much he'd grown.

However, there was something about being alone with Alex that made him feel a little like he hadn’t. 

"Are you not cold?"

"Didn't we deduce that your species is from a really cold planet due to your body temperature and the clothing Tripp described they were wearing?" Alex asked back.

Michael was used to a vaguely snarky Alex, it was in his genetic makeup. This was a different level though. Alex was in one of the worst moods Michael had ever seen him in that didn't result in a fight, instead it was all icy silence and irritated answers. Michael wasn't sure if it was because of his breakup with Forrest or if it was something else entirely. Maybe it was the fact that Michael was here at all.

He decided to keep quiet.

"You got me," Michael said, taking slightly bigger strides to keep up with Alex.

They were in a small town that served as a hub for a few even smaller towns that surrounded it. It had one small stretch of road with all the local businesses in it, a shabby hotel, a diner, and a farmer's market being the three biggest options. There were a couple others buildings, but Michael couldn't say what they were by just looking at them from the outside.

Alex seemed to know where he was headed though and he waltzed up to a building that was only identifiable by a sign that was meant to say CORRIE'S but was missing a few letters and said CORE instead. He pushed the door open and Michael followed. The inside had the heater blasting in a way that immediately smothered him, but he managed to keep his face even. It looked like a convenience store with only three rows of shelves in the middle. A sign at the back door read GAS PUMP IN BACK. Michael thought that was bad advertising.

"Hello," an older woman at the counter greeted. She seemed to be the only one here.

"Hey," Alex said, approaching her and turning on an easy smile. Logically Michael just knew he was being charming to get what he came here for. Illogically, it felt like Alex could be nice to everyone but him.

How many times could he tell himself to grow up? 

"What can I help you two with?" she asked. 

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but this place is owned by someone who used to live in Fort Belknap?" Alex said, not even beating around the bush to charm her more. That was the only thing to convince him it wasn't just him. 

The woman stared at him, face unchanging. 

"Who's asking?" 

"Holt," Alex said, smiling and tilting his head a little bit, "Carla Holt, to be more specific."

She breathed in and closed her eyes for a moment before opening them a few moments later. 

"Their timing has always been impeccable," she said, gesturing towards a door behind her, "Come."

"Who's Carla Holt?" Michael whispered to him as they followed. Alex grabbed his arm and squeezed, nearly causing Michael to fully trip over air. 

"Just follow my lead. Stay quiet," Alex explained quietly, "I'll tell you later."

And Michael did as he said. 

"You must be the littlest Manes boy," the woman said as she led them into a little office. It was cluttered and didn't really seem like the top secret place Michael was imagining. 

"Yes, ma'am." 

"Corrie," she corrected, "I never did like the sound of ma'am."

"Alright," Alex said, laughing lightly even though didn't reach his eyes, "My mother told me the same thing." 

"I bet so," Corrie said, digging through messy drawers of a desk. She sat down heavily into the beat up chair and started digging through a file cabinet. "I kept telling myself it'll eventually come and bite me in the ass, carrying secrets for someone I only hear from once every few years, but you never know what you're getting yourself into until after you're stuck."

"Yeah, I know how that feels," Alex sighed. Michael's eyes drifted to him. He avoided eye contact completely.

"I'll be honest, I wasn't expecting you. Your brother, maybe. Part of me expected your father to bust down my door more than anyone," she went on. Corrie pulled out a small box and opened it, looking in and making a face before closing it and tossing it over her shoulder. 

"Guess I'm the sucker who agreed to clean up duty."

Corrie laughed.

Truly, Michael expected more danger and more difficulty. He expected a fight or at least tension. Instead, Alex and Corrie made small talk about their shitty affiliations while Corrie dug through decades worth of clutter. Eventually, she pulled out a box and opened it and took a deep breath. She closed it again before giving it to Alex and Alex didn't reopen it so Michael had no idea what was in it. All he knew was that it went into Alex's bag.

"Thank you "

"Keep it safe," Corrie said, "Keep yourself safe." Then for the first time her eyes drifted to Michael. "You too. There aren't many of you left."

It was hot in the building, but somehow Michael felt like he'd jumped in ice water.

"Thank you."

"Mhm. Now get the hell out of my store before somebody follows you."

"Of course. Thank you again," Alex said politely and then he did as she said, turning on his heel and walking away. Michael wanted to stay and ask more–if she knew what he was, maybe she knew things he didn't and they could get rid of Mr. Jones–but Michael simply followed Alex's lead.

"Alex," Michael said, nearly having to jog to keep up. Alex opened the door of the store and a blast of cold hit Michael in the face, colder than before due to the extreme warmth inside. It took him a moment to reboot his mind enough to finish what he was saying. "Alex, what's in the box?"

Alex managed to close his eyes and shake his head in disapproval without slowing his pace. 

"Can you wait until we get to the hotel?" Alex asked, cold again. Michael nodded despite the fact Alex couldn't see him, deciding that a verbal answer probably would be annoying in itself. 

The problem with silence was that it was a sure way to get Michael to spiral. He had discovered very recently that being alone when he wanted to be alone the most was the worst idea. Now, he didn't want to be alone as much as he wanted answers. Walking in silence down a street while wondering what was in Alex's bag, who Carla Holt was, why Alex was angry, etc, etc, etc, was only making his mind race.

By the time they stepped into the lobby of the hotel, Michael was sure that Alex had just borrowed a bomb from an old lady and he was going to explode himself and whoever Carla Holt was was going to hunt Michael down in revenge. He of course didn't say that. Instead, he tapped his foot as Alex requested a room with two queens and didn't realized that the worker snorted because he was assuming they were two queens until after they were already heading to the room. 

"Should I go spit in his drink?" Michael asked when he realized. 

"No," Alex said, "You'd probably make it taste too sweet."

Michael again found himself stumbling over nothing and he looked at Alex, wondering what the hell was he talking about. But it was the nicest thing he'd said to him the whole trip and Michael decided to take it very personally. 

"You sayin' I'm sweet?" Michael asked, grinning. A smile pulled at Alex's mouth that he very quickly schooled, slowing as he came to their room. 

"I'm saying your saliva, and probably your other bodily fluids, have a higher concentration of a glucose-like chemical," Alex said, "As proved by Kyle and Liz when we got drunk."

"You guys drunkenly tested our saliva's glucose levels?" Michael asked, laughing a little. Alex finally speaking to him made his brain stop wandering as much. Not completely–he was still wondering about that box–but enough.

"We were talking," Alex said, unlocking the door with the keycard, "And noticed we all thought you three tasted sweeter than other people we'd kissed and, well, you know. So we did some tests."

"That's... Interesting," Michael said, letting the door close behind them.

Alex walked over to the bed closest to the door and carefully sat his bag down. Michael watched him, staying near the door. He was still unsure about where they stood. He knew Alex cared about him and he knew Alex didn't hate him, but he was also still holding him at arm's length. And then there was that box. He didn't want to push.

But Michael wasn't known for his patience. 

"Alex," Michael said, "What's in that box?"

Alex swallowed and looked up at him for a moment before patting the bed beside him. An invitation. One that made Michael's stomach drop and twist in 11 knots. But he walked closer, sitting beside Alex. Alex stared at him, his features slowly loosening up to betray his feelings. His eyebrows pulled together in that kind of worry that meant he felt like he was drowning, scrambling to pull himself to the surface and never able to get a good grip. Which would explain the coldness, he supposed.

"You know you can trust me, right? I'm... I'm working on not being so self-destructive, and, like, knowing I'm helping you out kinda helps when I feel shitty," Michael said. Alex huffed a small laugh and shook his head, dropping his chin to his chest for a moment. When he looked Michael in the eye again, he was back to being serious. 

"I did something stupid," Alex said, softly like it was a secret, "I agreed to something without knowing what I was getting myself into. And I'm kind of stuck right now."

"Stuck? What do you mean stuck?" Michael said, following his lead and whispering.

"I'm figuring it out, alright? Don't worry. I'll tell you later," Alex said, reaching out to squeeze his arm before dropping it back to the bed, "And I checked before we even left that I wasn't bugged and I've kept my eye out to know that we aren't being followed. And my computer definitely isn't. We're good. They're tracking me, but only to the extent I'm letting them. It's okay." 

"That doesn't sound okay," Michael said.

"Trust me like I trust you, alright?" He said. Michael reluctantly nodded. "I need you to hold something for me."

Michael blinked. "The box."

"Yeah."

"Who's Carla Holt?" Michael asked. Alex smiled softly

"It's not a who, it's a what. It's a code from my mom's side of things. She knows more about the alien shit than she let on," Alex sighed, "I didn't stand a fucking chance not being involved with this shit. My dad, my mom, you. So, you know, if you ever feel bad about that, it's my fucking destiny." 

Michael swallowed and nodded, feeling more eager by the second to know what was in that box. Needed to keep hearing Alex say how fated they were to know each other. Needed Alex to touch his arm again and smile.

"Okay," Michael said, trying to stay in his own space, "So we're fated. Cosmic connection. Called it."

Alex broke into a wide smile, genuine and welcoming as he shoved Michael's shoulder gently. "Shut up."

"Show me," Michael said instead. Alex's smile faded just a little.

"Do me a favor and double check our surroundings," Alex said. Michael nodded and tilted his head, sending a chair to lodge itself under the doorknob and pressed the curtains tightly to the wall. His eyes slid closed as he did a mental sweep of the building, not noticing anything out of order. When he opened his eyes again, Alex seemed to be closer. "Thanks." 

"Show me." 

Alex sighed and nodded, hesitantly reaching into his bag and pulling out the box. It was clear now that it was made of really nice wood, intricate carvings covering it. Alex handled it with an extreme care that Corrie didn't have with it. His eyes flickered between the box and Michael a few dozen times before he hesitantly opened it and Michael leaned closer to see.

"It's just a ring," Michael said, almost disappointed. It looked like a normal, silver band that was old and unpolished after years of being tucked away. 

"Not just a ring," Alex said, he kept his fingers very precise as he picked it up. Michael didn't miss the way it seemed to ripple at his touch.

"Something alien," Michael acknowledged.

"Something alien," Alex confirmed, "Most of the glass and even the rocks that you've had so far all seem to be crafted and at least heavily altered by your people to be as useful as they are. This... This was passed down as a pure substance that was mined and cut into a wedding band to mimic human customs." Alex looked at him. "It pre-dates your mother landing here, Michael."

Michael let out a shaky breath, eager and hungry for knowledge for the first time in a long time. He'd poured over Tripp's journal over and over, poured over Caulfield and Project Shepard records, all of it painful and sickening with an unhappy ending. And now there was something new– old –that might actually give him something more. Proof that aliens were here before his mother, proof that there was a reason they came to Earth of all places. More secrets he craved to uncover. He missed the feeling. 

"It's powerful and, as far as I can tell, the last of it left. The rest was probably destroyed with your planet. But it's old and... and sentimental. One of the older women on the reservation told me the sentimentality powered it more. Because it's not just a ring that symbolizes love or a bond between two people, but it's a new start. Blending the past they chose to leave behind together with something new and different. Safer and secure. Together," Alex said. Michael swallowed, eyes unable to break away from Alex's. Alex cleared his throat and looked back down at it. "That's what she said anyway. There was probably two at one point, but I'm sure the other is lost to time."

"Yeah, okay. Okay," Michael said, agreeing without hesitation, "I'll take care of it and keep it safe."

He went to grab it, but Alex pulled it out of his reach.

"Michael," he said, "When I say it's powerful, I mean the moment you put it on, something's going to… happen."

Michael hadn't really intended to put it on, but it seemed Alex knew him well enough to know that eventually he would. 

"What kind of something?" 

"I don't know, Michael. I just know legend says it has unspeakable levels of power. So, please, be careful with it. I'd prefer you do it with someone around in case it overloads you or something," Alex said. Michael didn't point out what Isobel had before–he was the only one who didn't have a limit.

"Why not just put it on right now?" Michael said, "We're in the clear and you're here. Why not?" 

Alex breathed in and out, staring at him with that same worried, downing look. Michael selfishly enjoyed it for a few moments–enjoying that he cared that much. So he smirked and held out his left hand, feeling confident.

"Go ahead, Alex. Put a ring on it," he said. A smile pulled at Alex's lips that he fought, but he relaxed his shoulders and grabbed Michael's hand with his empty one.

Alex's hand was warm. Michael was sort of obsessed with the feeling of it. Why hadn't they been holding hands this entire time? 

"I'm right here, okay? So if you need me to take it off or if you feel like you're going to lose control, let me know. Try not to throw me," Alex said. Michael rolled his eyes.

"I don't give a shit how much power I have injected into me, I'm not going to hurt you," Michael said. Alex raised an eyebrow. "Physically. Come on now, cut me some slack."

"Maybe," Alex said, putting the ring closer. Michael could feel it now that it was millimeters away from his skin, the power of it overwhelming. And Michael was intrigued. "Ready?"

"Always."

Alex slid the ring onto his ring finger.

The wave of power hit him instantly and, before he could adjust, sent him into a mindscape. Or–he thought it was. The room was damp and dark, unwelcoming. Michael looked around for something, someone, but he was alone. It was crowded with things, though, inventions and technological structures. It looked like his own lair but significantly less familiar, less comforting. 

“Michael?”

Michael turned towards the voice and saw Alex at the top of a ladder, staring down at him with a face that said he was doing everything to stay calm. He had red stains on his clothes. Michael stared at him, unsure what to do. Alex was down the ladder and centimeters away from him so quickly that it could only be achieved by him seeing something that wasn’t happening just yet.

“Are you okay?” Alex asked, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” Michael said, instinctually, “Where are we? What is this place?”

Alex looked around the room, his face betraying his pain before he met Michael’s eyes again. Then his hand was on Michael’s cheek with a warm and grounding presence. Michael’s heart was about to burst out of his chest.

“My research,” he sighed, “Half of it’s destroyed anyway. Let’s go.” Michael didn’t really think that sounded right. This didn’t feel like Alex’s space. He’d been in enough of Alex’s spaces before to know what they felt like. This wasn’t it.

“Your research?” he said. Alex gave him a look and stroked his thumb over his cheekbone.

“I’ll tell you later.”

“Stop that,” Michael said, his voice sounding more irritated than he meant. He could feel the anger in his body, but he didn’t know the source. “Stop not telling me things. You keep doing that. You need to tell me.”

“You’re right,” Alex agreed, swallowing, “But we need to get out of here. I swear I’ll tell you once we get in the car. But we need to get out of here.”

“You promise you’ll tell me in the car?” Michael said. Alex nodded.

“I promise.”

They were upstairs just as fast as Alex had been downstairs. Michael saw blood. He turned his head to find the source, but Alex’s hand was back on his neck to stop him.

“Don’t look. Let’s just go to the car.”

“What, you tryna baby me?” Michael asked, “You know I’ve seen some shit.”

“Yeah, I know,” Alex said, still leading him towards the door as his thumb dug slightly into the muscle on his neck, “Doesn’t mean I have to show you more.”

Michael sucked in a breath and he was thrown back into his body, the power from the ring still thrumming through him and teasing a possible second surge. It was old and unused and desperate to stretch out some of it's pent up energy.

Alex was there, staring at him and holding onto him. He was so close, so real, and so was that memory that was just in the opposite direction. Michael stared at him, taking him in.

"What happened?" Alex asked, hands squeezing his biceps. His hand started to slide up, but stopped at his shoulder. "Hey, you with me?" 

"Yeah," Michael said, "I'm okay."

"What happened?"

"I think, uh," Michael breathed, swallowing. His throat felt dry again. The heat of the hotel seemed to work with the heat inside him; he was on fire in the best way. "I got, like, That's So Raven'd."

Alex blinked a couple times, his thumb moving in slow circles against his collarbone not too far from where it’d been moments ago in his vision. Michael wanted to let his eyes roll back into his head and just sink into the bed with Alex beside him and let this undeniable strength course through him.

"You saw the future?" he said, "Like one of Maria's visions?" 

"I think so," Michael confirmed, "Only… mine wasn't of something bad. I mean, not really, anyway."

"What was it?" Alex asked. 

Michael licked his lips, studying Alex for a moment. The ring on his finger fit perfectly as if it was made for him. The power it gave settled nicely in him, pulsing and eager to be used just a little bit more, but in a childish, playful way. It wanted to stretch after too many years being cooped up.

"Hey, I'm going to try to see something else," Michael said. Alex's eyes went wide as saucers.

"What? Tell me what you saw the first time," Alex pressed, his hand shifting just enough to cup the side of his neck. Michael layered his hand over his, feeling bold and unperturbed. At some point, they were going to get there. He was sure of that more now than ever. 

And he wanted to see more.

" Michael ," Alex said, but Michael closed his eyes and breathed in, letting the power in the ring take him somewhere else.

And he was somewhere else. 

He was standing at the end of a driveway. He looked around and tried to grab some sort of identifier, but all he saw was a house behind him and then a school bus headed towards him. It stopped in front of him, a kid stepping off and running towards him with a backpack almost as big as she was. 

"Daddy!" the kid yelled and Michael tried his damnedest to act like he was meant to be here as the little body slammed against his legs for a welcoming hug. "Is Dad home yet? Can you tell him to get ice cream? I think we need ice cream."

"Oh, you think we need it?" Michael asked, walking with the kid towards the house. It felt natural, oddly enough. 

"Yes," the kid said simply, running towards the door. She threw it open and Michael laughed and jogged the rest of the way. He could hear her already telling a story about school and he was trying to stay close enough to follow.

He walked into a foyer, pictures lining the wall. Family portraits.

Him and Alex. The three of them.

When Michael came back to his senses, Alex was right there again and staring at him without faltering. The ring was still alive, but it was at a sated hum now that it had been used a few times. He wondered how it would feel doing something he understood. He couldn’t wait to try.

“Hey,” Alex said, soft and comforting as he welcomed his weight. The vision he had was definitely not what he was looking for, he wanted to know more about Alex’s research and why it all felt so wrong and where the hell they were, but the second one… 

“Hi,” Michael said, breathing and his eyes drifting down to his lips. Michael had experienced a lot of urges to kiss Alex before. Somehow this felt more dire.

“Please don’t do that again,” Alex said, “Maybe we should take it off.”

Michael shook his head carefully, eyes scanning him, “No, it feels fine now. It just needed to be used after being in a little box for decades. It’s good. Feels good.”

“Okay,” Alex said, still clearly hesitant. His fingers played with the hair at the back of Michael’s neck. There were two beds, but Michael was trying to figure out how to convince him to share one. They could fit. They’d shared smaller. “What’d you see?”

Michael breathed deep, wanting to get closer. He kept his hands to himself no matter how much he wanted to touch. He was being good. To get to where those visions said he was headed, he had to be good. Good for himself and Alex.

“Tell me what’s going on,” Michael said softly, “What are you researching? Who are you working with?”

Alex blinked once, twice before dropping his hand off of Michael. Which definitely hurt, but the fact that Alex didn’t move away definitely helped. 

“What did you see?” Alex asked again, more pressing, “I know you saw that I’m researching something.”

Michael shrugged. He technically did, but he didn’t see anything identifiable. He didn’t know what it was. He would like to. Then again, he’d always wanted to know everything about Alex Manes.

“I didn’t see what,” Michael said, “I just saw that someone’s going to fuck with it. I think. I don’t know, we were in this basement looking thing and it felt really off and, and not like you, but you said your stuff was in it. And you had blood on you and when we went upstairs, there was more blood. But you said not to look. I don’t know what you did or what happened, but, like, if you told me, maybe we can prevent it getting that extreme.”

Alex stared at him for a long moment. 

“You saw that both times?” Alex asked softly. Michael hesitated before shaking his head. “What else did you see, then?”

“Um,” Michael breathed, trying to think of the right words to say, “Uh. I don’t think, um…”

“ Michael.”

“Family portraits,” he said carefully, figuring that was easier to start with than a whole person who called them dad, “Like, ours. Um. I know we don’t belong in suburbia, but I guess we fucking get it anyway.”

He laughed. It wasn’t funny, but it was easier to say it like it was a joke. Alex looked at him, face confused.

“Suburbia? Like. White picket fence kinda thing?” Alex asked. Michael took a slow breath.

“I, uh, I didn’t see a fence, I was too focused on the‒” he stopped, licking his lips. Michael rubbed his thumb over the ring. It seemed to purr at the attention. Michael couldn’t wait to get back home and see what he could really do.

“On the what?” Alex prodded, reaching out to rest his hand on his leg and reigniting the contact. It felt so good. Michael really liked when he was touchy, it was his favorite thing about Alex.

“Um,” Michael breathed, feeling drunk off the attention and the ring all at once. He thought about lying, maybe that they were babysitting because that was close enough, but he was so tired of lies and half-truths and I’ll-tell-you-laters. “On the kid.”

Alex froze for a moment, “The kid?”

“Yeah,” Michael said, shrugging softly, “I, uh, I guess she was ours. She was calling us dad. Do we have any water? My throat is super dry.”

“I… I don’t think you’re seeing the future then, I’m never having kids. Do you realize how awful of a parent I would be? Awful. Neglectful. That’s not… And after I clearly fucking hurt people?”

“Maybe not,” Michael said, not about to argue right now. He was too busy feeling good. Alex kept his hand on his knee. “But whatever it was, it was good.”

Alex stared at him, quiet and clearly thinking things through. Michael let him. It was easier to give him space and time now. He’d gotten better at it before his visions, but they solidified to him that they were on a good path. It felt like they were making good choices and taking good steps. This was just a part of it.

Alex eventually took a deep breath, looked him in the eye.

“I’m gonna tell you what I’m doing, but you have to promise you’re going to stay out of it and trust me,” Alex said, “You promise?”

“I promise.”

“And you’re gonna promise to be honest with me?” Alex said, “And stay safe. Like, seriously. Don’t be reckless just because. I know you.”

I know you.

“Yeah. I’m doing better now,” Michael said, stretching his hand out, “I am. But I’m… I’m tired of not doing shit together. Doing stuff separately always gets us in shitty situations, Alex, I wanna be a team. Can I be on your team?”

Alex swallowed and moved his hand up, tucking Michael’s hair behind his ear.

“Yeah. Be on my team. Let’s be a team,” Alex said. He shifted and Michael waited patiently, watching him. “Okay, so. Deep Sky. It’s… it’s got some good people, I think, but it’s overall fucked. I don’t trust anyone in there, but it’s where I’m doing my research. Sort of. So I’ll tell you.”

It almost felt too good to be true to hear, but he didn’t need the ring to know that Alex was being honest. It showed him anyway. Truthfulness radiated off of him in vibrant blues and whites. He didn’t even need to get in his mindscape to be sure of it. It was strange to feel like that was unnecessary, like his body didn’t need confirmation because it already knew.  It didn’t feel like he was stepping off a ledge. He hoped Alex had the same confidence, wondered what would happen if he put the ring on him.

If Alex still felt like he was stepping off the ledge, he was going to be sure to catch every inch of him this time. No piece would hit the ground like all the times before.

He was going to make this work.

“Everything?” 

“Everything.”

[nateserenas]

did you like the tripp storyline as a way of setting up serenate in s3 or would you have preferred their build up to be done different

i’m obsessed with it <3

on the same day serena finds a letter from her father who left her proving once again that he doesn’t want to know her, serena goes downstairs to find tripp. she’s in so much pain in that moment and all she wants is to be distracted from it and to get away from her mother who lied to her and shamed her in a way serena just found out was incredibly hypocritical. tripp is exactly what she wants in that moment. a whirlwind romance that will sweep her away but also not hurt her too badly when it inevitably fails. also it will piss off her mother. so serena goes downstairs to find tripp. but he’s not the only one waiting for her. nate is there and he’s looking at her and he’s so earnest and he’s asking her to take a chance and to just stay there with him. and he’s nate and she’s loved him, in whatever way, for most of her life. so she runs. she runs alway from the possibility of feeling the pain she felt that day ever again. her father had just broken her heart again. her father who left. and nate is nate and she loves him and he has the potential to hurt her so deeply. he has the ability to break her heart. and that terrifies her. so she reacts. like this scene is so short, none of this is conscious thought. for serena, there is just pain and fear mixed up inside her so she reacts. she gets in the car with tripp. she runs from nate.

and then she’s at the cabin. and she’s calling nate. and she’s slightly tentative at first because she left him out there standing, but then they’re smiling and he’s telling her to stay warm because he’s nate and he always wants to know her.

then she wakes up in the hospital bed and she sees him there and she smiles. he stayed. and then she goes back to sleep, secure in the knowledge that he’ll be there when she wakes up. that he won’t leave.

and i’ve always been like the jump between all that and them together in the next ep was too sudden but i was wrong. like it makes sense. what was holding serena back wasn’t her feelings, it was very clear that she had feelings for nate. it was her fear. fear of being hurt, of people leaving, of losing him. episode 12 is about her becoming more secure in the knowledge that nate won’t leave. and like, serena’s obviously still afraid. that didn’t just change. but nate is not like her father. his first instinct is never to run from her. it’s always, always to stay by her side.

[dreamer-of-ships]

I’ve been working on a fic over the weekend and I’m actually really excited about sharing it. I’m still working on making my AO3 account, so I can’t post it yet, but I wanted to share a sneak peak with you guys! I’m hoping to have it up by the end of the week. 

I’m still tossing up with whether I want this to be a one shot or a full blown fic, because I have so many ideas, but nevertheless,  if you want a glimpse into what Malex could be like a few months from now, then this will be the fic for you :)

I’m happy to post more exerpts if you guys are interested! Just send me an ask!

-----

"Thanks for making breakfast," Alex said, his voice still raspy from sleep.

"I know you've been busy at work lately, so I wanted to make some time for us," Michael said. 

Alex felt his heart beating in his chest so rapidly then. He couldn't believe how thoughtful Michael could sometimes be. 

I love you so fricken much. So fricken much it hurts.

He wanted to say it out loud; he'd tried to say it for months. But he always came up short when he thought of the words.

He knew it was stupid, but he couldn't help feeling that Michael needed to say it first. Not to affirm to Alex that he really felt that way, Alex already knew beyond a shadow of a doubt how the other man felt, and Michael knew the same when it came to him, but so many times before, Alex had always said those words for him. They'd always spoken of their connection in the past tense. 

***

What do you want to say, Alex?

That I loved you! And I think that you loved me!

...Yeah

***

My Dad said that an Alien seduced Tripp into trusting her so she could exact revenge. He once said that you were doing the same to me, but he was wrong. I know that you loved me. 

***

The first time Michael had actually shared how he'd felt on his own accord, it'd led to Alex storming out of the bunker, Michael left reeling at how hurt he'd been when Alex had thrown their past back in his face.

When we were kids, you thought people were good. And god I loved you for it. But what was charming when we were 17 is just stupid now.

I don't want to live in that toolshed for the rest of my life!

***

Maybe Michael had never felt he could say those words without fear that they were always destined to stay firmly planted in history, never to be shared in the present day. So back then, Alex had taken the lead. Now, when they were well and truly together, Alex knew Michael needed to set the pace.   

But when they had finally found their way back to each other, and when Michael had almost said those words to him for real, in the here and now, Alex hadn't been ready to hear them. Not when the danger had been imminent, not when they didn't know if they'd see another day.

He wanted them to share how they felt without fear of what would happen after. He wanted them to share those words when they had their future to look forward to and when the world was calm and their shadows were well and truly in the rearview mirror. 

As he paid attention to his boyfriend across the table, shovelling bacon and eggs into his mouth, Alex knew they were on the tip of his tongue. He knew they didn't need the words, and he didn't need to hear the words to know they were true. But it was driving him crazy not saying them, and it was just a waiting game for Michael to say them first, and for real.

To be continued...

[kailazlo]

darren barnet & he&him/ cis male ‷ watch out , kaito “kai” lazlo has crash-landed into roswell !! they look thirty and celebrate their birthday on the fifth of march. they are from roswell, new mexico, reside in tripp’s trailer park  and are currently working as veterinarian. one thing you should know about them is they love looking up new conspiracies about the universe.‷ 

aanya and ricardo lazlo were married two years before they had kaito lazlo (prefers to be called kai), the eldest of the two lazlo children. the lazlo family was always a very laid-back kind of family. as long as both children were doing well in school, nothing lower than a B, they were pretty much free to do as they pleased within reason. it was a perk that kai had always taken full advantage of; plus, it helped that he also loved school. from a young age, he loved learning, and he was quick to pick things up. he was speaking at a much earlier age than most babies did, and even in kindergarten, he was asking questions that a second or third grader should've been asking. he was a curiosity to his teachers and a proud example for his parents, but all in all, he was just kai.

despite how he could excel in school that never stopped him from going a bit overboard with gaming, comics, science fiction television, crime podcasts, and so much more stuff that he loved to indulge in whenever there was a moment. sometimes he would stay up all hours of the night going hard on a new level of call of duty with some mates, screaming so loud, he'd sometimes wake up his parents and then get a light scolding to get off the game and get rest. but when kai wasn't diving into games or books, he visited the local record shop in town. nothing fascinated kai more than music and its history. after school, you could often find him hanging around feel good records.

as much as he loved his life in roswell, kai often thought about what life outside the town was like. he dreamed of a day he'd get the chance to get up and leave. during his college years, his second year to be exact, he met someone who kind of made him feel like he had left roswell in a way. she captivated him from the beginning with her dazzling smile and warm gaze; it was safe to say that kai was a goner. unlike him, she had come from london and had traveled to plenty of places. egypt, paris, turkey, everywhere he could only dream of going. they would spend hours just talking about her trips around the world, the best and worst parts of it all, and she would often ask him questions about himself too. even though they had an off-and-on relationship after they turned twenty-two, they never had any ill feelings towards each other.

at the age of twenty-five, everything for kai changed in plenty of ways. both his parents passed in a terrible car accident during winter, it was all over the roswell paper, and that same year he found out his girlfriend (then off) was pregnant. it felt like he barely had a chance to process his parent's death before he had to put on a happy face and suddenly accept and focus on the fact that he was about to be a father. as stressful as it all felt, kai did not stop working hard for a future that could be bright for his family. what he didn't realize, however, was that his partner did not share the same vision. the moment little clementine was born and able to be taken home, kai awoke the following day to a crying baby and a letter from the mother stating how sorry she was. she had noted in the letter that her feelings were deep for her friend april. for that, he was not upset with her; he was upset that she could abandon clementine the way she did.

picking up his broken pieces, kai quickly stepped into his new father role. he had ZERO idea of what he was doing, but the man tried. it wasn't all bad. in all of this, kai had a good friend who helped him throughout everything (WANTED CONNECTION). even if sometimes clementine's piggy tails weren't precisely the same level, she was a happy little kid, and he wouldn't change anything for the world. 

NOW he lives in one of the bigger trailers in tripp’s trailer park. clementine is seven and attends the local roswell elementary school. he went on to become a vetenarian. another habit he had, one clementine seems to have picked up, is bringing home any animal in need and nursing it back to health. now he just gets paid for it. he's very laid back and gentle when it comes to handling all the animals in his care and delivering any sad news to the families of the animals. clementine can sometimes be seen hanging around the animal hospital whenever he can't find a babysitter for her and it seems as if she will also be following in his footsteps of taking on the business as she often enjoys being his assistant and caring for the animals in any way she can. 

personality:

 super laid back, chill vibes, peaceful kind of guy. he’s proud to be a papa bear and if you let him he’ll probably go on about clementine for hours. he loves a good party and will sometimes find a babysitter so he can go out to a local house party a friend is throwing or the local bars. he’s there for anyone who needs it, whenever they need it, and is always ready to lend a helping hand. 

sexuality:

bisexual. he thinks he is anyway. he’s never actually been with a guy in any way, but he hopes to one day explore that part of him. 

connections:

the good friend: the one’s helped kai with everything as clementine was growing up!

the best friends: squad gang! some close friends! maybe childhood friends?

the gamer squad: gamer friends! pew pew!

the ex: it can be the one that left him with clementine or just a random ex! it can be a good ex or one that maybe things didn’t leave off to well?

the hook-up(s): one too many to drink? maybe back in his younger days? the possibilities are endless!

the secret hook-up: we can plot this one out! seems fun!

babysitters club: mei xuan

father friends: any dad friends would be lovely!

first m/m experience: we can plot this out <3!

whatever else anyone else wants!

[coltenpierce]

algee smith & he/him/ cis male ‷ watch out , colten pierce has crash-landed into roswell !! they look twenty-seven years old and celebrate their birthday on the first of april  they are from queens, nyc, reside in tripp’s trailer park and are currently working as clerk at alien gulch. one thing you should know about them is he thinks we are all in one giant simulation.‷

Name: Colten Pierce Age: 27 Sexuality: Bisexual (closeted bisexual) Occupation: Clerk @ Alien Gulch + traits: loyal, adventurous, emphatic listener - traits: self-destructive, reckless, impulsive

tw: addiction mention, car accident mention, death mention

Colrten was born to a young mother who only ever wanted to love her son and give him the best life possible. Unfortunately for a young mother at the age of sixteen this was seemingly impossible, especially when there was little to no support coming from the parents of the mother or his father (who was just as young). When she was seventeen, Colten’s mother ran away with him and some random guy who promised her the world.

The guy turned out to be a real piece of work. One year into the relationship was filled with anything but the honeymoon stage. Two years into the relationship with his mother the man ended up leaving her pregnant with Colten’s little sister and disappeared from their lives entirely.

The older Colten got the more the tried to help his mother out. He loved her efforts in attempting to keep a stable income but it was not an easy upbringing to say the least. By the time he was ten Colten felt like a full grown adult, especially when it came to caring for his little sister.

His mother, bless her soul, worked two jobs and one odd one every so often in an attempt to keep the household afloat. For the most part, it was Colten caring for his little sister, Sophie.

(tw: accident, death) One day while Colten was out visiting the park with his sister tragedy happened. He normally didn’t get distracted from watching Sophie…except today. He was arguing about a basketball game score when one of the kids he was in the middle of arguing with pointed in the direction Sophie was running off to. By the time Colten turned to see what was happening all he saw was his sister disappear beneath a semi truck and the rest was a tragic story. 

Colten never forgave himself for that either. It showed in the way he became more detached from everyone around him, how he often woke up in a cold sweat and screaming, and it showed in the way he cried almost every night while holding Sophie’s favorite stuffed lamb.

And his mother changed after that. She no longer seemed as kind towards him as she had always seemed. When he cried for Sophie she would only roll her eyes and drink more. Her boyfriends got worse too. Overall, life got worse.

Much like his mother, Colten ran away from home at seventeen. Unlike his mother, however, he didn’t run off with someone who promised him the world. He ran off to find himself in the world and at the same time travel. He took his guitar and some clothes with him.

His guitar (Lucy), and singing, had always been a natural talent for Colten. It’s a talent he used to make money as he lived from city to city. He had always dreamed of becoming a rockstar one day, but that was just a dream

From eighteen up until recently the guy has been struggling with drugs. He has tried multiple times to lean off either, but in the end, as much as he tries, Colten always falls back into old habits. It’s to the point that the guy doesn’t see much light anymore and has accepted that this is who he was meant to be. Someone who is just  waiting for the next high in life in a lot of ways.

He found Roswell, New Mexico and honestly ended up enjoying the small town from day one. He found a home in Tripp’s Trailer Park & a job as  a clerk at Alien Gulch. It’s been  about a year now that he’s living in Roswell and he doesn’t see himself moving any time soon. Although he’s become more discrete with his habits, he still silently struggles with his addiction. He has a big heart and uses it to help any youth he see’s that may be homeless or in need of a helping hand. You can often find him voulnteering at the nearest soup kitchen or shelter. If not then he’s offering his spot to anyone who many need a place to crash in for a night or two. 

He really loves attempting to lift the spirits of today's youth and help them out as much as possible. He isn’t shy, either, to talk about his addiction to them and tell them the horror stories is has brought. Even if he doesn’t mention he still struggles with it on and off. He’d do anything to help the youth of today out as much as possible. Anything to prevent anyone from going through the path he went on. 

You’ll always catch him causing a ruckus somewhere over something. Always ready for a laugh and to bust out his guitar at any open mic night. 

He’s bisexual. He hasn’t opened up about it because he’s very shy about his sexuality. He’s never had a real boyfriend or gone all the way with a guy, but he’s often thought about it. He has kissed guys here and there but he’s always chalked it up to them just being drunk and it meaning nothing. 

Oh...please don’t get him started on how we all live in a simulation and glitches in the matrix. He WILL NOT shut up about it once you do.

[pastelwitchling]

moviesbuff asked:

So this one is kinda sad.

So the aliens have weird biology and once they love someone, that person can smell the love pheromone on them. ( which smells like rain.) And they have this pull toward them (like the cosmic connection that Tripp and Nora had)

The whole gang (+M*ria) are at the crashdown, and Liz and Alex and Kyle start talking about how the pod squad smell like rain, and Maria laughs "No they don't." And they're like "yes they do." And everyone realizes that Michael didn't love M*ria.

So Alex wants to move on with Forrest but Guerin wants to be with Alex. And mr. Jones finds out and tells Alex that he can sever the cosmic connection between Malex and that he can take them to the remains of their alien ship where there is sth he can use to do it.

So the pod squad + Alex + Mr. Jones go to the remains and on the way there, Guerin corners Alex and tries to change his mind but Alex is adamant about moving on and he tells guerin that he loves Forrest and that they're not good for each other and that he's saying no. (All the things Guerin told Alex in 2×01)

Bonus for Alex/Isobel friendship and Belmanes.

***

Liz smiled over her microscope. She’d first conducted this little experiment a few days ago, frustrated with the dead ends she kept hitting and eager to do something mindless and silly and fun for the first time in a long time. It had been a question, small but incessant, nagging at the back of her mind since she’d woken up to Max’s scent of a heavy storm one morning.

She couldn’t help the giggle that escaped her lips now at what she was looking at. The bloodwork and sample tests she’d had done confirmed it.

“I take it that’s good news?” Michael said from across the lab. He would come by sometimes, not often, to look through some of his own samples, and when he caught sight of Liz’s blush, he raised a brow. “Or great news?”

“Okay,” she shook her head, knowing Michael might find the findings as amusing as she did. “So. A few days ago, just during my free time, I started looking into the pheromones that you, Isobel, and Max give off. I noticed that Max smelled like rain, and then Kyle had said the same thing, and I suspected Isobel felt something for him for a while though she wouldn’t say it which I don’t understand why I mean –”

“Liz,” Michael pinched the bridge of his nose. “It’s too early in the day to sing Valenti’s praises. Back on track, please. You’re saying Isobel, Max, and I . . . give off pheromones? What, like, to attract people to us?”

Liz’s smile widened. “Not exactly. I compared your samples to mine, Kyle’s, and Rosa’s. Now, mine and Kyle’s carry traces of that same pheromone, but Rosa’s doesn’t.”

Michael, ever the genius, understood what she was trying to say right away. “You’re saying whenever one of us likes a human, that human can – can smell us?”

“Smell rain,” she said, “to be more precise. It’s a very innate and unnatural scent, but to me, to Kyle, it’s like you’re always wearing a special kind of perfume. And you have to do more than like, otherwise half the school would carry the traces after Isobel. No, you have to fall deeply in love. I’m talking true, Once Upon a Time forever-kind of love.”

Michael did not smile or laugh or share in any of Liz’s excitement. Instead, he fidgeted uncomfortably where he stood. Liz faltered. A year ago, she might’ve understood why Michael would react this way, but after Maria . . .

As if sensing her name, Maria suddenly came into the lab with Alex at her side.

“It is ten in the morning,” she said, a cup of coffee in hand which she set on the desk. “I have a business to run, there better be a good reason to call us down here, Ortecho.”

“I’ve been awake for five hours,” Alex told her, taking a seat on a stool between the desks. Liz noticed Michael glancing at him every so often. “This is basically the middle of the day.”

“Oh, well, aren’t you Mr. Perfect?” Maria said, taking a long gulp of coffee. “Super Alex, up before the sun is, how good for you.”

Alex winked, and Maria almost choked trying not to laugh. Liz smiled, noticing Michael subtly inching closer to Alex. He didn’t even seem to realize anybody else was in the room anymore. She cleared her throat loudly.

“I found something really cool that I wanted to show you,” she said, turning back to her microscope. “Come see this, both of you.”

“Uh –” Michael started, “Liz?”

Maria sighed and did as she was told. She straightened. “Okay, why am I looking at a bunch of squiggly little lines?”

“They’re pheromones,” Liz said excitedly, and both Maria and Alex waited. She quickly clarified, “I – well, I realized that whenever Michael or – or Isobel –”

“Liz –”

“Or Max, when they fall in love with a human, they release this special pheromone that only that human can smell.”

Alex blinked, and came to see through the microscope, too. “Really? That rain smell is a pheromone?”

“Yeah!” Liz said eagerly. “You know about that?”

“Yeah,” he scoffed, still looking at the sample. “I knew Michael was in here before I saw him, I could smell him in the hallway.”

That strongly? Liz thought.

She started to smile as she noticed Michael’s eyes on him soften, like he wanted nothing more than to hug Alex from behind and bury himself in his warmth. All this time, how had she never realized? “Really?”

But Maria only frowned, looking from Michael to Alex to Liz, and back again. “What rain smell?”

Silence. Alex looked up at Maria with furrowed brows, then to Michael. He looked just as startled and confused as Liz felt.

Maria rounded on Alex. “Alex?”

Alex cleared his throat, waking himself, glancing at Michael. “It’s – it’s this intense rain smell, like . . . like a storm.”

She shook her head, and her thought was clear; she had no idea what they were talking about. The only one that didn’t seem the least bit surprised was Michael.

“Not even a little bit,” she said quietly. Then she turned to Michael. “Never? Not for a minute?”

Michael shook his head. “I . . .” he tried, but trailed off, raising his arm halfway to gesture at Alex before it fell back down to his side.

Maria looked to Alex and something in her eyes shifted to resignation as the truth dawned; Michael had never really loved her. Not like he loved Alex, not for a second.

She cleared her throat and plastered on a smile. “Well, if that’s all, science geeks, I have a bar to run. Excuse me.”

“Maria –” Alex started to follow, but Maria turned at the door and said, “We’re still on for lunch, right?”

Alex, startled, seemed to only be able to nod. Maria’s smile turned warmer, more genuine. “Good.” She turned and held up a hand. “Later, nerds!” she called, and left.

Alex sat back down on the stool with a sigh, wincing as he rubbed his leg. He must’ve been a little more worse off this morning than he’d been willing to show, and after Maria’s exit, he seemed to simply be too tired to pretend he was fine.

“I’m sorry,” Liz said, shrugging a shoulder. “O-Or I’m not? I don’t know.”

Alex gave her half a smile. “That makes two of us. Except . . .” he looked to Michael who was tentatively kneeling at his side, squeezing his knee as if hoping it would help relieve him of any pain. “I may be a little more selfish than you.”

“Right,” Liz muttered, trying not to smile. She didn’t think it was right to, not after what had happened. But Alex . . . Alex was her friend, too, and she couldn’t help but be happy at the way he was looking at Michael, at the way Michael was looking at him. It was like how Max looked at her; like all the stars in the universe couldn’t compare.

She turned around as Alex slid a hand into Michael’s curls and Michael leaned into his touch as if desperate for it. Next time, she realized, when it had to do with Michael, Alex was the only one to call. He was the only one, after all, that seemed to matter.

***

I hope it’s all right that I deviated so much, I had to!

[avocado-hater]

My thoughts on AHS Double Feature E6 (Spoilers)

People in this town are insane as f.

GO COACH BESTIE!

I hate that i'm not american because all the characters this season only speak in pop culture references and methafors. I can't understand half the things Holden is saying.

Oh Harry, you're such a kind soul... i mean maybe, i think you lost your soul a few days ago when you treated your wife like trash.

I'm finally getting to understand Harry. He's just stupid and reckless.

"He wasn't bad, it was the pill!" "It was Doris fault, she wasn't talented" "He never meant to hurt people, you just don't understand how awful it is to not being able to use your full potential" I can see it coming. I get it tho, he's a DILF.

Alma calling Ursula a chicken bitch and Harry not reacting at all is just lovely. Great parenting skills.

Are the pale creatures eating Ursula? I don't think so.

That baby would be better in Belle's belly than under Harry's supervision.

Was this untalented/talented fight really necesary?

Leslie looking hot with that gun.

I KNEW THAT THE CHEMIST WOULD END UP TEAMING WITH URSULA!

Bye bye, Harry. You should've seen it coming.

Oh so now The Chemist and Ursula are fruity and they're raising the little devils together. This is gonna end well.

The characters evolution/development this season is awful.

The hustler joke wasn't funny, it was upsetting. Alma is a child.

Prodigy kid count your days.

That was some hell of a rushed ending. Very unsatisfying.

My thoughts on AHS Double Feature: Red Tide.

This is the first season i've watched weekly since Cult and it was kinda cool watching it that way. I was really excited about this season because of the cast and because everyone said it was very dark and very well written, well, i don't know about that.

Red Tide strong points were the score, cinematography, the aesthetic and the cast, it had some cool "social messages" and in some ways it felt really personal, it was upsetting and dark at times and i liked it, but the writing was not out of this world, most of the characters were annoying and awfully developed. It was very predictable and rushed and no, don't blame it on the number of episodes, i've watched limited series with 5 or 6 episodes and some of them are masterpieces. But it had its moments. it had a great premiere and episode 5 is in my top 5 of the best episodes in the AHS universe. I liked the tension at times, but it was messy and overwelming in a bad way.

Frances Conroy, Sarah Paulson, Lily Rabe and Evan Peters were the highlighst of the first half. Even tho Belle and Austin were villains, it wasn't hard for us to root for them, they were both very interesting and compelling and yeah, Evan might be playing the hot weird guy again but he does it so well and i kinda missed his particular voice. Same with Frances, the way she delivered her lines and how she made us empathize with Sarah was awesome.

We can't say a bad thing about Sarah Paulson's performance, plus she was playing Linda Tripp at the same time, no one is doing it like her, and Lily? She should be doing Oscar winning stuffs, the way she made us empathize with Doris in episode 5 only proves how much she loves what she does and how good she is at it, Doris might not be talented but Lily sure is.

Doris fate was one of the highlights of this half too, same with TB Karen's. The whole thing was very tragic and memorable and i really liked that.

I'm sure Sarah Paulson will be nominated twice next year (Lead actress (Linda) and supporting actress (Karen)) and i fear for Frances and Lily because they really deserve some awards, but horror is underrated and with the amoung of upcoming limited series this year, i don't see it happening anytime soon.

Finn Wittrock did really good as the lead and Leslie Grossman did great too but i'm kinda tired of her playing the same annoying bitchy character over and over again and i know it's not her fault. Lily and Finn have zero romantic chemistry, they could play friends or enemies or siblings but they aren't believable as a longtime married couple, mostly because Finn looks like he's on his late 20s.

Macaulay Culkin and Ryan K.A were amazing additions to the cast and i hope they come back for another season and i hope they play very different characters from the ones they got to play this season.

I don't have a lot to say about Billie, Adina and Angelica. Adina was doing great as always but they killed her off in episode 3 and i was expecting The Chemist to be darker and a more complex character.

I like upsetting, disturbing endings but i never got to connect with The Chemist or Ursula and it felt too rushed and even predictable. Cheesy at times, messy, kinda silly and where is the major plot twist? A very Murphy ending.

If you were expecting a redemption arc or justice at the end, i think you didn't understand this season.

I don't have high hopes on the second half but we'll see, right? I'm excited about Sarah and Lily playing historical figures tho.

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Top 5 Reasons Javier Garcia’s Pretty Great

Of all the games in TWDG, A New Frontier seems to get the most shit. Stick around this fandom long enough and that’ll become apparently pretty quick, especially on other platforms such as reddit and instagram... and y’know, I get it. ANF is far from perfect, parts of the storyline go no where and characters don’t get the development they should have, a lot of people were upset that Clementine wasn’t the main playable protagonist, and certain character models look like... well, they look like potatoes. 

Hell, I’ve talked to some people who flat out say they don’t even consider ANF as part of the canon and skip it when they replay the series, which.... harsh, but you do you. However, if you do skip over ANF for whatever personal reasons you have, you are missing out on what I would consider the best part of that game: Javier Garcia. 

I love Javi, and I will stand by the fact that he’s a pretty damn good playable protagonist. I just wish more love and time was put into developing ANF to give him an even better story but y’know... Telltale was goin’ through shit, so we got this... 

But, I still wanna talk about how great I think Javi is so c’mon, let’s take a walk. 

5. Javi’s relationship with David

Now this might come off as a weird one, especially if your Javi has a more hostile relationship with David. Even so, I find the dynamic between Javi and David to be one of the more compelling aspects of ANF and I wish it was more front and center than it is but y’know. 

So we got Javi, who is the younger, more irresponsible brother who became this hotshot baseball star only to lose it all by gambling. Then you got older brother David who is a military man with a couple kids and a second wife, and he’s always felt a little overshadowed by Javi. This creates this dynamic of brothers who do love each other, but don’t always know how to communicate and confide in one another and it can lead to a lot of tension or hostility.

The route I usually take with a Javier who tries his best with David, who wants this connection despite everything, who made the promise to their father to look out for David and be there for him, to stand with him when he needs it, y’know? 

Some stand out moments for me is during the baseball flashback when David’s trying to open up about something, but struggles because Javi isn’t taking a hint about the serious nature, when they stand together on the roof, and the last conversation we see between them if David survives. 

Oh, and ya can’t forget the “I love you”’s when David is two seconds away from murdering Javi... that’s the good shit. 

And y’know, on the flip side where Javi is against David every step of the way, you can still argue that acts as a more tragic yet compelling story of two brothers who never saw eye to eye, never tried to, and it ended in tragedy... I personally don’t prefer this route, but to each their own. 

Again, this is at #5 because it’s not handled the greatest and it’s a bit of an unpopular choice.... but I don’t care, Javi and his relationship with David is one of my favorites. 

4. He’s pretty charming, isn’t he?

I’m sorry, I can’t help it.... if a charming character can make me laugh, then I almost always end up loving them. Javier Garcia is so damn funny and I love him for it. 

Yeah, ANF is a mess but this dude makes it so much better with his dialogue, a great performance by Jeff Schine, great facial expressions, and just an overall charismatic air around him. 

He’s just super likable, okay? Even when you play him as a total bastard, I have a hard time not enjoying his presence. I’ll be honest, if Javi wasn’t the playable protagonist or if he was this bland, watered down version of himself... I might be one of those people who skip over ANF. 

He’s easily one of my favorite parts of this game and one of the few redeeming things about it. 

3. His growth as a character

Like I mentioned in #5, when we first meet Javi he’s this irresponsible ex-professional baseball player who wasn’t around, even though his father was dying from cancer. After his father dies and he runs to try and make it home in time... he’s too late and David and their mother are pretty upset with him. 

And then his father turns into a walker, and the apocalypse happens. Javi is now trying to survive with Kate, Gabe, and Mariana while everything goes to hell around them. But for someone known to not be around or to skip out when things get a little tough, Javi doesn’t abandon them. Nope, he stays with them for years, traveling around and surviving, making sure they have what they need. 

By the end of the game? Javi’s proved to be a leader, proved that he’s better than he once was. Again, this is ANF so this growth isn’t super smooth or the greatest, but damn it, Javi makes it work. 

He and his family, no matter the combo you got, are staying in Richmond and they’re going to try to start over and rebuild it, make it better than it was.... which I can only assume they succeeded because after that they were never heard from again. 

Also, Javi is constantly having shit thrown his way and somehow he manages to pull through. 

So good job, Javi, you did it. 

2. Javi’s got a lot of force

Listen... Javi is so fun to play as. Like okay, I know that Telltale games don’t have the most complex combat system... you literally just push the buttons as they appear on screen. But I don’t care because Javi makes that fun. 

Javi really puts all of his weight into each hit and you feel it. I don’t know how to explain it, but there’s something satisfying about the way Javi fights with a melee weapon, and it’s not something you feel when you play as Lee or Clementine. You do get it a few times when you place as Michonne in the mini-series, but even then, I would argue that Javi did it better. 

It’s especially prominent towards the end of ep5 if you go after David and Gabe,  and Javi’s on this motorcycle with his damn bat knocking over walker after walker until he finds them... then you get all this intense force when Javi is just gunning and beating down walker after walker to get to the vehicle Gabe and David are trapped in. I love it so much, it’s easily one of my favorite moments in ANF. 

Don’t get me wrong, I have fun playing as Lee and Clementine, but Javier Garcia hits different, y’know? 

1.  He’s really trying his best to care for everyone, okay? 

When we think of Lee as a playable protagonist, we tend to think about how wise he was, how he always seemed to know what he was doing and how much he was willing to sacrifice for Clementine... and when we think of Clem as a playable protagonist in S2, we’ve got this sad little girl who gets punished no matter what she does, she’s smart and often underestimated, but she makes plenty of mistakes which she learns from.

And then we have Javi who has a bit of both in him. He’s older and can have his moments of wisdom [like with Gabe and Clem] but he also has plenty of mistakes he’s gotta learn from and sometimes no matter what he does, everything goes to hell... but Javi does manage to stand out on his own among these two. 

Javi does what he can, he tries his hardest to look after these kids even though he never planned to be a father figure, he works with Kate to make sure they’re safe. When he fucks up, he tries to make things right... even though it doesn’t always work out. He loves Gabe and Mariana, and you can see and feel his heartbreak when he’s the one to bury Mari after she’s killed.... and now he has Gabe, who’s hurting, and he does what he can to make sure he doesn’t meet the same fate which.... sometimes doesn’t work out depending on your ending.

I just-- he’s trying, okay? Javi is trying his best and I love him for it.  

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Honorable Mentions

-Javi has some of the best deaths/fails moments... seriously, I could watch him confidently run right into those metal stairs and fall to his doom a hundred times. -He’s a literal disaster bi.   -He fucking loves pudding and I mean, who doesn’t? Y’know?  -His bromance with Tripp is pretty good until Tripp dies for death quota reasons. 

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So what are your thoughts on Javier Garcia? Do you agree with these reasons, or do you have any to add? Lemme know, it’s always fun to have character discussions.

Have any suggestions for future T5F’s? Feel free to send ‘em in! :D

Next week’s T5F