#and to really feel what you’re creating

[cowgirlvi]

Jinx who has sexsomnia…

mdni. needy sub-bottom jinx. fem-top reader. dub con. somno. sexsomnia. short blurb.

jinx has always had a vivid imagination. her creative yet chaotic mind is something she’ll never be rid of, so it makes sense when that transfers over into her REM state of sleep.

she used to have night terrors—relentless, haunting things that made sleep feel like a battleground. but since meeting you, she says the nightmares have subsided. as long as you’re sleeping beside her, jinx’s dreams are nothing more than a quiet, endless void—a darkness that, for once, feels safe.

but you have an inkling as to what she really dreams about now. because every night, once she drifts deep enough, her hips begin shifting, moving lazily against your leg. 

it starts off languid, almost imperceptible, but the further her dreams pull her under, her movements grow more insistent, more intense. soft whines escape her chapped lips, her breath hitching as she unconsciously seeks out friction. even in her sleep, she's desperate for something just out of reach, lost in a world of sensation she won't remember in the morning.

you can feel it—the heat of her pussy, the dampness seeping through her thin, pink panties, smearing against your bare thigh. she’s soaked, wet and sticky, sloppy in her haste to make herself come.

her fingers twitch where they rest on the sheets, grasping at nothing, moaning sleepily, “uhh, uhh, mmm.”

you tense your thigh, helping to create more pleasurable friction while jinx humps you like a dumb mutt, and you wonder what she’s dreaming about. is she remembering how you stuffed her needy pussy full of cock earlier that day? how you fingered her in that gross, grimy alleyway the other week, making her cry?

her slutty body is completely debauched while her face is peaceful with sleep, mirroring a fallen angel. the juxtaposition is amusing—funny almost—and so is the way jinx’s pussy always needs your constant attention, even in a state of rest.

she’s teasing you and she doesn’t even know it.

every night she only sleeps in a little pair of panties, her legs and torso bare, pink nipples pebbled due to the bite of chilly air. and right now, all you want is to push her panties to the side, to stuff your nose inside her cunt until her pheromones make feel drunk, to kitten-lick her little hole while her arousal soaks your chin like honey nectar, to feel her spongy walls cling to your fingers like dew on grass.

her nose is wiggling like a bunny, pink tongue sticking out between her parted lips. you imagine she’s dreaming of kissing you now, of how you fuck your tongue inside her mouth until she grows dumb, how all she can do is hang onto you for comfort while you ravage her sweet lips.

she’s such a needy little thing, always relying on you to make her grow stupid and mindless.

jinx looks so sexy like this; vulnerable and trusting, unaware of the depraved thoughts running through her own mind. the bed is starting to creak and shake with the strength behind her thrusts and you’re surprised she hasn’t woken up yet.

you know she’s getting close because she’s humping against you sloppy and staccato now. her panties are nothing more than a sopping, squelching mess every time they make contact with your thigh. you can hear the obscene sound clearly in the quiet of your bedroom, the way the soaked fabric clings and sticks to jinx’s swollen pussy lips, only to peel away with a lewd, wet schlick.

her eyebrows are creased and she’s panting with more desperation. your own cunt throbs in sympathy.

”that’s it, baby. let it out, there ya go,” you murmur, brushing her bangs from her eyes. 

and she listens to you—despite her unconscious state—because she comes against your thigh suddenly. her back arches like a drawn bow and her pussy is scalding hot like lava, a fresh flood of arousal gushing out of her tight hole.

her pink tongue lolls out, dripping down her chin with drool as she pants and mewls, drowning in the sensations that consume her dreaming mind. and as quickly as it began, it's over. jinx goes limp, collapsing against the mattress like a puppet with its strings cut. her little chest heaves as she gulps down air, her skin flushed in the darkness.

she settles back into the mattress, one of her thighs still thrown carelessly over your hip, pinning you in place. you don’t mind, finding a perverse sense of comfort in jinx’s claim on you, even in her sleep.

taglist; @marvelwomenarehot0, @marieeeluvsyou, @mxchi-mxxn, @el-amor-que-tu-quieres, @jinxvex, @mwahbabe, @teddybearbutch28, @stupendousbananasharkcop, @nahcala, @ellieslob, @idontwannabehereatm, @rhian88, @kyur1jinx, @vivispace, @girlbeatings, @blackdykegirlblogger, @thatgrlnany, @imfckngfantastic, @f3ralpuppyg1rl

(2/16/25)

[yaseraphine]

pick a card 5 - what are people's first impressions of you ?

masterlist / ko-fi

my last post : your 2025 main lesson and themes.

Pile 1

10 of cups, King of Swords, 9 of Wands, 7 of Swords, 4 of Wands, The Sun, The Lovers, Death

Mischevious, Cunning, Manipulative in a flirtatious way ??, flirtatious, funny, Victorious, Happy, Fun to be around, Doesn’t take responsibility for things, Playful, Too unserious, Hot and sexy, Hot n Fun, Short n Sweet, Wet n Wild, If you’re a woman, people might think you easily get super wet (what is wrong with people respectfully 💀), Femme fatale/fboy boy, You look like trouble pile 1 not gonna lie lmaoo, Too hot to handle, People assume you’re a cheater or just kind of sneaky but all of that dark energy comes out somehow really playful ?? At first glance you exude strong Gemini and Aries energies  : kind of childish and playful, really “oopsie daisy”. They’re impression is that you’re the type of person that plays dumb when you get called out for your misbehavior. People might think you are commitment phobic, A player but people don't even mind to be heartbroken if it's you : “I don’t care if I get played by them tbh” people lowkey want to get heartbroken by you (people are crazy 🤡) 

People’s first impressions of you is that you’re a firecracker. Pile 1 I keep on seeing Maddy from Euphoria and Megan Thee Stallion’s Realer era, Pimpin is a song that plays in the background when you’re walking in the street lmaoo You look like you're always in a badass edit

I am hearing the lyrics “she bad mix the ratchet with the classy ooh so bad i just couldn’t let her past me no i told her “shawty, you so right but you so wrong”. Pile 1, you definitely got that aaah (reference to that one tiktok sound of She Knows - Ne-yo feat Juicy J and T pain). You literally make people do double takes on you.

People directly assume if you came into their life, you would ruin them but they would consent to their own self destruction because of how hot you are.

People's first impressions of you is that you’re a master manipulator, but not a horrible one that genuinely leaves others traumatized forever. You’re flirty, sometimes on purpose, sometimes not, but it's mostly people's delusions and projections that hurt them more than anything. They just assume things when you never meant anything, and honestly I don't even think you give people mixed signals. People mix them up by themselves. Like you smile at them just out of politeness and people are like “ damn they're into me or what ?!” What kind of people are around you Pile 1 ? Never met this level of delusion in my life 😭☠️

Something extremely strange about those impressions is that I don’t think people think you’re toxic ?? Which is a bit weird because I have been only describing manipulative behaviors… Pile 1, your energy is really complex to grasp and it stirs intense and contradictory reactions inside people when they first meet you.

I am getting people make a lot of assumptions about you because it’s not just first impressions. People project a lot on you, probably because you are really attractive and people seem to not be able to think a hot and sexy person can be a good and kind hearted person ??? These people are projecting hard literally

People’s first impressions of you is that you are a really sunny person, a really bright and happy go lucky person. 

They also instantly get that you probably got a lot of suitors and people at your feet, waiting for their chance with you. 

When they talk to you, I feel like people get really insecure and they instantly start to compare your life (i mean the 1000 assumptions of what your life is like that they created in their heads on the spot...) and compare it to their own lives. They compare your eloquence, your energy, your aura, the energy and the vibes you exude with their lack of charisma and presence. I don’t know if you’re around a lot of insecure people but be careful, some of them are secretly waiting for your downfall because of how jealous they are of you.

The type of people that are jealous of you instantly when they first see you are generally the same gender as you. If you’re a man, they compare for example how healthy your hair are, how women are easily attracted to you and follow you everywhere you go . Not going to lie it’s giving Chad VS Nice guy/ Incel kind of dynamic. Like they're internal dialogue would probably something like : “ Nice guys finish last anyways… I am sure he treats girls bad and is a player and girls still love him…It's so fucking unfair.” (such a low vibrational energy yikes 🤢). If you’re a girl, they compare your body, your smile, your makeup and how your outfits fit you perfectly , how their own crushes seem to like you more than them YET you don’t even pay mind to them (the jealous people’s crushes) lol 

Pile 1, I would advise you to be extra protective of yourself and your energy. Your spirit irritates a lot of people’s demons.

I find it interesting because this pile is heavy on gender dynamics, power of attraction,... Most of you here are probably straight, or bisexual at least. I don’t see much queer action going on. You also have a really young and fresh energy so you are probably in your 20s.

You incite a lot of hate, jealousy and envy from the same gender. And you incite a lot of obsession, desire and admiration from the opposite. You incite so much jealousy just by your presence, and it happens almost systematically and starts right when people meet you for the first time. I feel like you might have lilith somewhere prominent in your chart, first house, harshly aspected with your ascendant, also Neptune dominance.

People look at you and they instantly think to themselves “this person should star in a movie, what are they doing working in at the local Walmart ??” or “they should be in the cover of vogue. Why are they in college ? They're too hot to be sitting in a classroom all day ?!!” 

Something I am getting from all this channeling is that people's first impressions of you are generally extreme, and mostly false 💀 Different people have different assumptions about you, but everyone seem to agree that you first come across as a heartbreaker and a player. Basically pile 1, you look like trouble at first glance.

The quote I got for you is a beautiful one from Carl Jung : “People will do anything, no matter how absurd, to avoid facing their own souls”

MUSIC : Pimpin by Megan Thee Stallion / Ne-yo feat Juicy J, T-pain - She Knows (Remix) 2014

Pile 2

Ace of Wands Rx, 5 of Wands, 4 of Wands, 6 of Swords, 2 of Swords, 8 of Cups, The Hanged Man, 5 of Pentacles

People’s first impressions of you is that you’re really closed off and standoffish. Really protective over your energy, your time and your space. You appear somehow aggressively defensive, really “get out of my way bitch” type of energy. 

People’s first impressions are that you’re holding on to a lot of pain and hurt which, in result, makes you really hostile. People can see at first glance that you have been through a lot of negative experiences in life, which made you in return cold and distant. 

Pile 2, you give the energy of a black cat, and you hiss at any person trying to approach you too closely. You really have that lone cat energy.

You have the vibes of someone that bites back. I am hearing the audio “Get your fucking dog bitch!! “ / “It don’t bite.” / ‘YES IT DO !!!”. People think you will jump on them at any given moment if they say something that you don’t like,...lol

When they first meet you, people try to be really careful with their words because they are scared that if they say something wrong, they will cross you. If you’re with a group or someone else when people first meet you, they will avoid, out of fear, to directly engage with you, and will observe how your friends or the people that are with you handle you so they can do the same. 

Pile 2, people’s first impressions of you is that you are scary as hell lmaoo

You give people the impression that you’re judging them in a way. You might unintentionally side eye people a lot. You make people uncomfortable with your standoffish attitude. 

Now, this pile is divided in two sub-types : 

you are perceived exactly like what I described above : really bitchy vibes, no bullshit energy. You’re protective of your energy because you have a lot of self-respect and don’t want people to disrespect the way some did to you in the past. 

The second type, you are like this not really because of self-respect but because there is an underlying insecurity, something particularly broken inside of you. It feels almost like you put up this front of confidence and assertiveness and people usually can see right through it. If you’re faking it until making it a lot of people upon their first impressions pick up on that. 

These two sub-types can be blended too, like you could be both at the same time or perceived as both at the same time. (I don’t know if this makes sense )

People’s first impressions of you is that you are really authoritative and controlling. You probably have a really tight schedule that you don’t like to change for anyone. You look like you don’t like to compromise or work in groups. Their first impressions of you are also that you don’t really like change, you don’t like incompetency, and that you have a really good skincare routine (??random as hell lmaoo). 

People think you eat healthy boring food, like bland porridge for breakfast and a bland salad with almost no seasoning, that you snack on overtly expensive cereal and protein bars that taste like grass (people are really funny i swear this is so hyper specific)

I think their first impressions get them to make a few assumptions on you for a few minutes, but then they move on with their lives like “well i don’t know good for them” or “let them be”. People don’t want to get too carried away in the impressions they have of you and the assumptions they make from it because they don’t want to disturb your peace. Like you have an energetic protection that gives them a limited amount of time to ponder on who you might be. Like I am seeing a system almost like the one in Inside out, a little creature, a fairy or a guardian angel, coming into the person’s mind and starting the timer the moment they stare at you or interact with you for the first time with their foot tapping on the floor and their eyebrows frowned, looking over their watch each second ticking with growing impatience. People feel like they have to go through tests to be allowed to think of you deliberately. 

Pile 2, you have really protective guardian angels damn ! They tolerate no bullshit congrats!!

QUOTE : healed people hear differently

SONGS : Focus - Saweetie / Plan B - Megan thee Stallion / Here - Alessia Cara

Pile 3

King of pentacles, The Star, 7 of swords, 10 of Pentacles, Ace of Wands, 10 of Wands, 5 of Cups, Death

When I first started shuffling for your pile, High Maintenance of Saweetie started playing. Pile 3, you’re standing on business ! It was especially this lyric that stood out to me : 

“See I'ma rider but nah I ain't a die

'Cause I wouldn't take a bullet for a n***a, that's a lie”

People’s first impressions of you is that you are a workaholic with all your life figured out. You have a clear path of where your life will take you. 

People’s first impressions of you is that you’re extremely busy and productive, but, despite that, you are not a robot that does things mindlessly and repetitively. No, you are your own unique person, you have a clear and  higher vision, you seem like a complex individual with a mind of your own.

People’s first impressions of you is that you are a complex individual, with many layers. Instantly, people want to get to know you and get closer to you. They want to know your backstory, and what led you to be so passionate about everything you do today. They want to know how you seem to manage everything in your life so gracefully. 

People’s first impressions of you is that you are a deep soul that learned to make peace with the lighter side of life. You know when to let go and have fun, and when to cling onto things and be serious about things. 

People’s first impressions of you is that you’re beautiful, I am even hearing “striking”. 

People perceive your beauty as being ethereal. It’s not an instagram model type of pretty or handsome, it’s more sophisticated, it’s unique, it is just “you”. 

Maybe a lot of you are not conventionally attractive, you have a particular physical trait, something that makes you stand out instantly. It usually disturbs people a bit when they first meet you like “Oh!...”. I don’t know if you get what I am trying to say lol It is like you’re a woman with really thick and black body hair, but, instead of hiding them or shaving them, you just let them be there. You don’t really care much whether people see them or not. It could also be that you have back acne, and this does not stop you from wearing tank tops or just let them be visible. You don’t try to make a bold statement by doing this, because you’re just like “It’s natural what can I do about this ? It is what it is.” . People immediately pick up on this type of mentality from you. People want you to teach them how to do it. I am hearing “Teach me your ways master” lol . You seem really wise and you know how to not take everything personally. Really an old soul. 

Back to the physical trait thing (because I think people scrutinize your face a lot when they first meet you), you might have a roman nose, or you might look really “ethnic” or “exotic” to people. Maybe you’re a POC in a predominantly white environment, or you just look quite different from your peers.

-> Ok guys, I am picking up on something INSANE. People who would usually bully others for that physical trait you have, sense your strong self-respect and energy and are instantly subconsciously afraid to make fun of you or to try to belittle you. This is actually so fucked up what… I don’t know what is going on in this entire reading but a lot of low vibrational energies were channeled. Anyways. I feel like you grew up being the weird kid that grew into your features and personality, and now, retired high school bullies (not the one that bullied you, if it happened, just general retired high school bullies) lowkey sense they would have bullied you in the past if you were in the same class as them but now can’t do it because it’s lame and not socially acceptable for adults to do shit like that.

People are kind of scared to sit in your energy for too long when they first meet you and have their impressions about you because they feel like their energies are not high vibrational enough for them to be allowed to sit in your powerful energy for too long ?? Lol You intimidate people a lot but they don’t know why, they just feel the urge to shut the f up in your presence and just bathe in your energy silently ?? Weird 

Okay Pile 3, keep it up , never let people dim your light ! Your soul has a powerful pure essence that will  take you far in life.

QUOTE : My soul has traveled long and far to find yours

SONGS : Froot - MARINA / High Maintenance - Saweetie / Icy - ITZY

[shuadotcom]

Strawberry Sunday (YJH & KMG)

->Summary: When your best friend is away, you and Jeonghan always find time to play. This time he invites his friend to play along and things get a little messy - in the literal sense.

->Pairing: Yoon Jeonghan & Kim Mingyu x Fem!Reader ->Genres/Tropes/AUs: Smut, best friend’s brother, fuckbuddies (is this a trope???) non!idol au, pwp ->Rating: 18+ MINORS & AGELESS BLOGS DNI! YOU WILL BE BLOCKED ->Words: 8.4k | ->Warnings/Content: profanity, threesome, dirty talk, oral (m & f receiving), handjob, unprotected sex, fingering, food play, nipple/boob play, begging, praise, teasing, cum play/body painting, biting/marking, pet names (sweetheart, baby, good girl, babydoll) and I think that's it 😮‍💨 ->Note: Written for the secret cupid event hosted by @ddeonghwa-s! Hiiiii @gyuhanniescarat, it's meeee I'm your cupid!! 🩷 Please enjoy this fresh freak nasty filth I’ve whipped up for you!! 👩🏽‍🍳💋 (and tbh for myslf too bc as a ShuaHannieGyu girly I very much enjoyed creating this hehe)

Thank you 37432987414 billion times to @shadowkoo for the perfect banner!!!! I'm still so obsessed with it! And thank you to my love @soongyeopsal for always being my favorite beta 🥰

The weekend. Easygoing Saturdays and lazy Sundays: the perfect way to end a stressful, fast-paced week.

You're halfway through your weekend and feeling wonderfully relaxed. On Saturday, you did some light cleaning that you were behind on and leisurely, at your own pace, ran a few errands, but most of the day was spent in your apartment, curled up on the couch with a book in hand.

Sundays are for sleeping in and when you do finally wake up, you take a long shower, complete with your favorite candles and a lo-fi mix as you scrub and relax under the warm spray. Once you’re in your comfiest lounge clothes and have taken the time to whip up a yummy brunch, you settle in on your couch, remote in hand. There are a number of dramas that are overdue for your attention, so you decide to pick one at random and get lost in it.

And you do manage to get lost in your show, cozy blanket, and your couch. Your brunch has been eaten and your eyes start to droop shut as you feel a midday nap coming on.

This is interrupted when you hear the chime of your phone from somewhere in your blanket cocoon.When you manage to fish it out, you see an incoming call from your best friend.

“Hey, Soo, what’s up?”

“Y/n! Please lend me your baking skills!” She sounds desperate and it makes you nervous.

“What? What’s wrong?”

Sooyoung sighs heavily over the line, the sound of the phone shifting is almost too loud and you have to ​​pull yours away from your ear a little bit.

“Are you busy? Can you come over? I’m trying to make cupcakes for Hyoseob for Valentine’s day, you know, but I fucked up the recipe because you know baking isn’t really my thing and now I’m panicking and don’t know if I’ll get them done by tomorrow and could really use someone who knows what the hell they’re doing in here, please?”

A small laugh leaves you at your best friend’s frazzled speech and you can hear the pout in her voice.You glance around you, taking in one more view of your lazy Sunday setup, before turning off the TV.

“Of course, I’ll get dressed and come over.”

“Oh my gosh, thank you so much, Y/n! I love you so much, thank you, thank you!!”

“Love you too. See you in a few.”

Once you hang up you sigh. You do enjoy baking and you always love spending time with Sooyoung so helping her won’t hurt. It’s not really the plan you had for today, but it could be worse, so you won’t complain. Not too much at least.

At least the drive to Sooyoung’s isn’t long and there wasn’t much traffic on the road which you’re grateful for. You get to the small house she shares with her brother and it only takes one knock to have her swinging the door open.

“Thank god, come in!” She grabs your arm, giving you enough time to at least take off your shoes, and parades you into the kitchen. As you pass the hallway, you can hear voices and the sound of a TV in the distance.

“Is Jeonghan here?” you ask, trying to sound casual. You do a great job at not making any indication that you’re actually hopeful that her older brother is here.

Yoon Jeonghan is the prettiest man you’ve ever had the pleasure of being around. And as of two months ago, he’s also the prettiest man who you’ve been lucky enough to have pleasured you.

It wasn’t on purpose, you always remind yourself. You just so happened to be over, drinking with Sooyoung and her brother as you all hung out on a Saturday night. Sooyoung drank a little too much and passed out. You and Jeonghan did your best to take her to her room and tuck her in.

Honestly, after that you’re not even sure how it happened, but you ended up riding Jeonghan on his bed and he gave you what you still think was quite possibly the best orgasm you’ve ever experienced in your life.

Since then, you and he have hooked up secretly here and there when given the chance, but nothing serious has come of it. He just has a pretty dick and knows how to fuck so who are you to say no when he offers?

“Oh, yeah sorry. He and Mingyu are here, unfortunately. Mingyu stayed over last night and wouldn’t you know, neither of them helped me at all!”

“Well, Jeonghan doesn’t really belong in the kitchen,” you joke. You also hide how you nearly choke on your spit when she mentions Mingyu’s name. You don’t know him that well, but he’s around enough that you can easily remember what he looks like (gorgeous) and how he’s built (like a greek god).

“Yeah, but Mingyu does! Remember he made that cake for my birthday last year! And the food he made at our housewarming. But when I asked, Jeonghan said ‘no they’re busy’ and dragged him away. They’ve been in his room all day doing whatever it is men do.” Sooyoung scoffs, rolling her eyes. “Anyway, that’s fine because now my bestie is here and is a better baker than all of us combined!”

You smile, genuinely appreciating the compliment, but also taking in the state of the kitchen. It’s a good size with a decent amount of counter space and great natural lighting. Said counter space now, though, is covered in ingredients and bowls and even some sprinkles and sugar and flour.

“So uh, what was the plan in here?” you ask, doing a slow lap around the room and eyeing two bowls of what looks like batter and fluffy, pink icing.

“Okay, so I wanted to make a batch of strawberry and a batch of chocolate cupcakes for Hyo, but then I burnt the chocolate cakes so those are a dud, and I ran out of sugar for the strawberry cupcakes and the chocolate frosting. I’ve been at this since I woke up at like 9 and all I have to show for it is a burnt tray and this mess you can see. The only thing I think I did right was the strawberry frosting.” She gestures to the bowl closest to you. You grab a spoon from the drawer and dip into the frosting, taking a small amount.

“Mmm. This is good.”

“Thank you! But now, I have to go to the store and get the missing ingredients and then try this again which is why I called you because if I go and get what I need and screw it up again, I think I’m going to have a full meltdown and cancel Valentine’s day.” Sooyoung lets out a huff, shoulders deflating as she sniffs.

You toss the spoon in the sink and rush over to hug your friend. You push away your thirsty thoughts for her brother and his friend and focus on her.

“Hey, it’s okay, girl! I’m here now, okay? I’ll help you tidy up, we’ll go over the ingredients you have left, make a list for the store, and get a game plan going okay? I’m here to help.”

With wide, shining eyes, Sooyoung pulls back and pouts at you. “You promise?”

“Of course! I got you.”

The brunette girl smiles at you, sniffling once more and then she lets you direct her to where to start.

It doesn’t take long to tidy up and get everything ready to start baking again. You toss the unfortunate batch of burnt chocolate cupcakes and place plastic wrap over the bowl of strawberry frosting, setting it aside since it’s the only success so far.

You help Sooyoung with the list of things she needs to grab for the chocolate cupcakes plus some extra ingredients just in case. After tidying up, you find out she has just enough of everything else for you to start the batter for the strawberry cupcakes while she’s gone.

“I shouldn’t take too long! I know the store closest to us is closed on Sundays, but there’s one like twenty minutes away so I should be back when the cupcakes are at least in the oven!”

You’re making sure you have everything in front of you that you need to prepare the batter so you nod, agreeing with her and saying goodbye. Once Sooyoung is gone, your borrowed apron is tied, you play some music on your phone, humming along, lost in your own baking world.

“If I had known there’d be a cute girl in my kitchen, I would’ve come out here to help a while ago.”

Jeonghan’s voice from the doorway makes you jump. You’d just added together the wet and dry ingredients and the sudden intrusion nearly makes you jump out of your skin.

You offer a wave as he and Mingyu file into the kitchen with Jeonghan coming to stand behind you.

“Well, your sister needed help and you didn’t come to offer a hand.” You hum, feeling Jeonghan’s hand ghosting over your hips and thighs.

“Yeah, but I’d much rather help you.”

“But what if I don’t need any help?” you shoot back, glancing over your other shoulder, seeing Mingyu hovering over the bowl of strawberry frosting on the kitchen island.

“Hmm, well I don’t know about that… It looks like you might need some help here.” As he speaks, his nimble fingers trail to the front of your jeans, ghosting over your covered crotch.

“Jeonghan,” you warn, “I have to get this batter in the oven while Sooyoung is gone. She’s gonna expect them to be baking.”

Normally, Jeonghan’s silky soft voice and skilled hands has your clothes off of you in no time. You and he had fallen into an unspoken kind-of friends with benefits thing. You don’t really talk for leisure over the phone or anything, save for a few flirty texts sometimes when you post something he likes online, but most of your communication is in person when you’re with Sooyoung or with each other’s tongues in your mouths when it’s just the two of you.

Sooyoung doesn’t know that you’ve been fucking her brother for the last two months, mostly because you don’t know how to even approach the subject. Plus, it’s just casual fun that you and Jeonghan have. It’s not like you’re dating or anything.

That’s not to say you wouldn’t date Jeonghan, but that’s an entirely other conversation to be had and feelings to unearth that you’d prefer to stay buried until that’s something you have the energy to dive into. For now, casually fucking him whenever you can will suffice.

“Hey, I’m not stopping you. Keep doing what you’re doing.” His voice is low, a smirk quirking at the corners as he places feather light kisses on your neck. His hands land on your hips, lightly squeezing as he brings the front of his body flush with you.

As best as you can, you finish adding everything to the bowl, grabbing the whisk a few inches away from you and starting to combine all of the ingredients. It proves to be more difficult than you thought when Jeonghan starts nibbling at the skin at the base of your neck, pulling your sweater collar aside to get to it.

A soft, breathy sound slips out of you when he bites down, the bowl almost falling out of your hand as you tilt it to get a better angle. Luckily it doesn’t, but you do spill some of the batter on the counter.

“Oops. You better be careful not to make a mess, sweetheart.”

He’s playing so dirty by dropping a pet name, and it immediately has your stomach clenching. Jeonghan reaches over you, his finger scooping up the splattered batter. He brings it up to your lips, waiting.

He doesn’t have to wait long, your mouth opening and the digit eagerly dipping inside, landing on your tongue. You close your lips and suck, eyes slipping closed both at the taste and the gesture itself.

“Good girl,” Jeonghan whispers and it takes everything in you not to turn and fall to your knees in front of him right then.

You and Jeonghan are lost in each other, you still lightly suckling on his finger while he peppers the side of your neck with kisses again.

“Um,” a third voice clears from behind you both and your eyes shoot open, letting go of Jeonghan’s finger. You had completely forgotten that Mingyu was less than a foot away.

You straighten up, focusing on the task at hand again, whisking the sweet concoction and trying to calm your wild heartbeat.

Jeonghan turns to Mingyu with an eyebrow raised, both hands resting on your hips. “What’s up?”

Mingyu lets out a nervous chuckle, hand moving up to push back his dark locks. “I mean… Bro, I’m standing right here.”

“So?” Jeonghan challenges. “What’s a little fun amongst friends? I’m always down for fun. What about you baby, do you like to have fun?” The latter part is for you, your eyes darting over your shoulder to Jeonghan, to Mingyu, then back to Jeonghan.

Is…is he saying what you think he's saying? Is he proposing you hook up with him and Mingyu? You don’t want to say it out loud, scared you’re reading the room incorrectly. You hold Jeonghan’s gaze for a few seconds, his smile softening just a little and eyes twinkling as he blinks.

“Y-yeah. I like to have fun.”

“See!” Jeonghan immediately says, reaching out to pinch your waist. “Baby is always so nice to me and she’ll also be nice to my friend.” A shiver runs through you at his words and it takes real work and concentration to focus on making sure you don’t fling cupcake batter all over.

Jeonghan uses the beat of silence in the room and your concentration on your work as an opportunity.

Soft hands are back at your waist, rubbing and squeezing lightly before his fingers practically dance to the front of your jeans. He plays with your zipper for a few seconds before pulling the metal down and easily undoing the button.

You can’t help the way your breath catches in your throat when he slips his hand into your pants, fingers immediately finding your covered clit. A squeak comes out of you as Jeonghan applies light, casual pressure, humming in satisfaction. Your mixing is paused as you close your eyes, relishing in the slow, meticulous circles he makes.

“Make sure you concentrate, sweetheart. Didn’t you say you have to finish this by the time my sister comes back?” His tone is teasing and he chuckles at the way you flinch when he reminds you that you’re on a timer.

It takes all of your resolve, but you do hone in on the bowl in front of you, finally deeming it smooth enough to be baked.

Jeonghan’s fingers stay pressed on the outside of your underwear, but he gives you enough room to reach over to grab at the cupcake pans that have been greased and sat waiting nearby.

Mingyu is now standing closer than before, not close enough to touch, but close enough that his eyes can see where Jeonghan’s hand is.

With shaking hands, you begin pouring the batter into the cupcake slots. It’s truly a feat as his fingers are still working at you. The task suddenly becomes almost impossible when said fingers finally slip into your panties, slender digits rubbing against your already wet folds.

A yelp comes from you which makes Jeonghan coo at you. “Look at you, baby. Already wet just from some teasing.”

“I - it’s your fault,” you manage to sigh out, faux annoyance in your words which Jeonghan already knows is a front.

“Not my fault you want my fingers inside you so bad. That is what you want, isn’t it?” His lips ghost over your neck again and you feel him hover so close to your entrance, but not actually making a move to enter you.

“Fuck, you know it is, Hannie.”

Jeonghan grins ear to ear - you only bring out his nickname when he’s making you feel good.

“Wanna hear you say it, baby.” The tip of his finger is right there - all he needs to do is crook his finger and he’ll push his way into your hole.

“Hannie,” you beg, “please, please, please put your fingers in me? I need you,” The words are breathy and your hands have stopped working, gripping the half empty bowl as you await his next move.

“Since you used your manners and said please, I suppose I can. Just make sure you finish your batter,” his hair tickles your neck as he leans down to kiss your neck again and he finally slips a finger into your pussy.

“A-ahhh!” You let out a breathy moan as he finally gives you what you want, immediately pulling you closer to his chest while you pour the batter, every single inch of your brain struggling not to fuck it up.

When you finally get the cupcake pan filled, Jeonghan has slipped two fingers into your cunt, his fingers working you slowly, the sounds of your own wetness mixes with the music you still have playing on your phone in the background.

“Hannie,” you breathe out, eyes fluttering closed as he finds your g-spot, massaging it with gentle strokes.

“Yes, baby?”

“I - the oven. I need to p-put these in,” the sentence is a struggle and Jeonghan chuckles, loving the way you go almost braindead when he’s touching you.

Jeonghan slips his fingers out of you and you whimper at the loss. He finally backs away, allowing you room to open the oven. Everything is quiet save for your music and your rapid breathing.

Once the mini cakes are in, the timer is set, and oven mitts are placed aside, Jeonghan strikes.

He spins you around, letting your ass hit the counter as he cups your face and leans in to kiss you finally. Soft lips work expertly over yours, drawing little sighs out of you. Jeonghan’s an excellent kisser, in addition to an amazing lay, so kissing him always sets your body alight. His hands eventually drift from your face, one inching up to the back of your neck to wrap around the base while the other slips down and behind you to grab a handful of your ass, pulling your body flush against his. You can already feel his half-hard erection poking against you and you clench your thighs together.

You and Jeonghan make out sloppily, the kiss nothing but teeth and tongue and little noises you both make. Eventually, he pulls away, both of you panting. He turns his head and gestures for Mingyu to come closer.

You shamelessly eye the very tall and very wide man that approaches. His black long-sleeved shirt hugs his chest in a sinful way and his loose fitting pants do very little to hide his obvious arousal.

“Mingyu already knows that we sometimes like to spend time together. I figured that since we’re all here and we have a little time, you can show him just how good you can be. I think you want to anyway.” Jeonghan pulls you away from the counter and maneuvers you into Mingyu’s surprised hold.

His arms wrap around your middle, loosely hanging there but making no move to let you go. Your hands land on his chest and you can’t hold back from squeezing the firm muscle underneath. He blinks down at you, eyes boring into yours in mild shock. He effortlessly recovers from his shock of suddenly having you in his hold, a smirk replacing the ‘o’ shape his mouth had taken.

“I’d love to actually,” you whisper out finally, gulping audibly when you finally catch a whiff of Mingyu’s warm cologne. “But your sister is only going to the store for a few things so we don’t have time.”

As if forgetting that you’re only this close because of her absence, Jeonghan pauses next to you, and feels the pockets of his sweats for his phone.

“Damn, I think I left my phone in my room. What time is it?”

“Check my phone,” you jerk your head towards the counter, directing him to where your phone lays charging a few inches away. You’re still leaning against Mingyu’s firm chest as the man rubs circles into your lower back that have your knees feeling like jelly at just how warm and gentle and big his hands are.

Your eyes are staring at his lips as he looks between yours and your eyes. It’s clear you’re both wanting to do something but are waiting for an update on the timing you have.

“Well will you look at that,” Jeonghan starts as he looks at your phone. He brings it to you, showing you a notification on your lock screen from Sooyoung. The words start with ‘I fucking hate traffic…”

Reluctantly you move one hand from Mingyu’s chest to take your phone and unlock it.

Sure enough, when you get to the messages, there’s a few texts from Sooyoung, complaining about traffic and an accident that’s taking so long she hasn’t even made it halfway to the store yet.

You send a few texts back and forth and she says she isn’t sure how long it’ll take to get there and back now, but she’s not going to give up. You reply that the cupcakes are in the oven now so everything is still on track and encourage her not to let the traffic win. You remind her of her boyfriend whom she’s doing all this for and how happy he’ll be to receive handmade edible gifts from her. You think it’ll give you enough time.

You make sure your ringer is turned on and tell her to update you along her journey and she agrees. Handing your phone back to Jeonghan, you fill him and Mingyu in on Sooyoung’s current location and the status of the trip.

“So…what does she think, she’ll take more than half an hour?” Mingyu speaks up, finally uttering more than a few words.

“Probably,” you guess, both hands now back, firmly planted on the man.

“If you ask me, I think that’s enough time for some fun,” Jeonghan offers, fingers playing with the tie on the back of your apron.

“I think you’re right,” you agree. It’s all you need to say before both men start to move.

Mingyu finally leans down and captures your lips in a rough kiss. His tongue immediately darts out, licking at your lips, begging for entrance. You allow him in, his tongue plunging into your mouth to taste every part of you.

Behind you, Jeonghan manages to untie your apron as his hands move to the waistband of your jeans and easily slide them down your legs. His fingers, a little cold, trace the front of your panties before he’s yanking those down too and helping you step out of them. Your body jumps at the sensation of being exposed like this, but Mingyu moves from your lips to your neck and that’s what your attention is diverted to.

Jeonghan’s hands caress your ass, kneading and handling your cheeks slowly but roughly.

“Sorry, Gyu, but I need to see her,” he warns before pulling you away from Mingyu and turning you so you can lean your upper body on the counter.

You let out a yelp at both the sudden turn and at the fact that you’re bent over the kitchen counter, naked ass and cunt on full display for them.

“Fuck,” Mingyu hisses before you feel a hand land a surprising smack on your ass.

“Right? She’s already fucking glistening, isn’t she,” Jeonghan agrees and you can’t help the embarrassment that heats up your spine, knowing your wetness is evident and being observed. There’s a moment of shuffling before you feel soft hands on you again, pushing apart your legs more. “Can you make room for me, sweetheart? Gotta show Gyu how good you look.” Of course you oblige, opening as wide as is comfortable and resting more on the counter.

“Just like that,” Jeonghan praises before he goes in, sinking two fingers back into you, a small, but audible whoosh of air is heard from both men.

Jeonghan, having been between your legs numerous times at this point, knows exactly where to apply pressure and the angle to piston his fingers to have you a moaning mess in his hands.

“Mmph, fuck, Jeonghan!” You can’t help the yell of his name, your knees shaking as he fucks you faster with his fingers. His other hand brushes upward, over your ass and up your spine until it wraps around the back of your neck. He applies the lightest of pressure to the sides of your neck then pushes you down, making your ass poke out more to make his actions more visible to himself and Mingyu.

“Fucking hell,” Mingyu breathes from next to you. When you can manage to lift your head and turn, your drooping eyes see him, hand shoved into his pants, pumping back and forth under the fabric.

Biting your lip, you manage to gesture him over to you with the flick of your hand. Mingyu doesn’t need to be told twice as he scurries next to you, within arm’s length. It’s not the easiest position, but you manage to reach out and shove your hand into his pants. You immediately find his generous length and you wrap your hand around it, squeezing a few times before jerking him off. You worry that your pace is too slow, but the way that Mingyu’s head falls back has you rethinking that. He lets out a low groan as you work him, one hand resting on the counter and the other reaching up to grasp at his own hair.

You marvel at him, this tall, hot man that’s scrunching up his face and biting his lip because of the way your hand moves over his dick.

Wanting to redirect your attention back to him, Jeonghan picks up the pace and eases a third finger into you, his other hand finally snaking around you to press hard against your swollen clit.

“Ah-ah! J-Jeonghan, please.”

“Hmmm?” he hums, already knowing what you want.

“Faster, please. ‘M gonna cum!” He makes a noise of acknowledgement and the movements on your bundle of nerves become harder.

“I guess I’ll let you cum. You’ve been good so far, especially helping Mingyu out with his problem.” His words sound sweet, but you also know if this was just you and him and you had more time, he’d still be teasing you until you cry. That’s not the case now though, as Jeonghan takes a moment to readjust the angle of his hand before he’s driving his fingers in and out of you with all of his force while his other hand still busies itself with your swollen clit.

Your grip on Mingyu’s dick falters, your eyes fluttering closed again as Jeonghan works to push you closer to the edge. Without missing a beat, Mingyu’s hand rests over yours, guiding you up and down his length which seems just as good as you doing it on your own.

Mingyu’s moans match yours in frequency, both high pitched and breathy. “J-Jeonghan, just like that, shit! Fuck!” When you finally cum, your face rests against the tile, yelps echoing in your own ears. Mingyu lets your hand go to allow you to grip the counter top, trying to keep your balance.

Jeonghan, being who he usually is when you’re together, doesn’t immediately let up his actions, fingers still tapping at your sensitive bud a few more times before you’re whining even more and attempting to close your legs.

With a snicker, he finally pulls back, sighing loudly as he dramatically licks his fingers.

“So fucking good as always.”

“Yeah?” Mingyu quips, his eyes locked in on your swollen folds, wet with your release.

“Yeah, you should have a taste too, Gyu.”

You don’t even get a chance to ask the time or check your phone, which is what you thought about doing first, because Mingyu’s got your hips in his grasp and turns you around. Your wide eyes stare at him and you think that he has to look just as ruined as you feel.

“Would you mind if I get a taste of you, babydoll?” Something about the way the pet name rolls off Mingyu’s tongue sends a whole other sensation rocketing through you.

You breathe out a ‘yes,’ and Mingyu immediately uses his strength to lift you quickly from around your waist.

“Mingyu!” you squeal, arms wrapping around his neck as he carries you to the kitchen island and places you down as if you weigh nothing. He winks at you before he’s sliding down to his knees and opening your thighs.

He lets out a low whistle which you want to ask the meaning of, but you don’t get a chance as he surges forward, wrapping his lips around your still sensitive clit.

He suckles the nub a few times as you whine above him before diving his tongue into your entrance. He wastes no time eating you out more frantically than you think even Jeonghan has. Within no time you’re a moaning mess, head rolling back and body both trying to run from his talented mouth and trying to push yourself closer. He keeps his hands positioned on your thighs, gripping you so that even when you try and flinch away, he can still direct you back to his mouth.

He makes small grunts from below you, some of satisfaction, but most are just from getting lost in you: sounds of pleasure as his tongue darts in and out of your entrance, his lips latched onto your lower ones. It feels as though he’s got his entire face buried between your legs, his mouth damn near enveloping your entire pussy. His tongue is stiff as it darts in and out of you, rubbing against your walls and licking every inch of you that he possibly can.

Your eyes are closed, but you still hear the soft sound of Jeonghan’s footsteps moving closer. “Fuck, baby I didn’t know how hot it’d be to see you get eaten out. Wish I had my phone right now to remember this.”

Somewhere in your foggy brain, you register his words and glare at him. Or at least you think it’s a glare - it’s hard to tell when you can barely keep your eyes open.

Either way, the older man gets the intention, chuckling and raising his hands. “Yeah, yeah I won’t.” His eyes sweep over your body, leaning forward to ease the apron from around your head, followed by your sweater and your bra.

Sitting completely naked on your best friend’s kitchen counter is the last place you thought you’d be today, yet here you are. Mingyu’s grunts between your legs can be felt through every part of your body, your next orgasm on the horizon.

“M - Mingyu! Fuck, ‘m gonna cum again!”

The man clearly hears you, making a sound of acknowledgement before his tongue moves up to suck hard on your clit. Two thick fingers slip easily into your twitching hole, moving fast and in time with his wild tongue.

Jeonghan grunts at the sight, his own pants now at his knees as he fists his cock, watching your body twitch and jerk. His eyes lock onto your tits, nipples hard and inviting and he almost leans forward to capture one in his mouth when his eyes suddenly dart to the bowl of frosting not too far from you all.

He’s reaching for it and taking the plastic off. He at least has enough decorum to grab a big spoon from a nearby drawer, scooping a hearty amount out. He takes a small dollop on one finger and reaches forward to smear it over one of your nipples.

The sensation catches you off guard as your eyes fly open to look, being met with Jeonghan’s almost cat-like grin. You don’t even get a chance to question his actions or scold him for dipping into the frosting before he’s leaning in, tongue lazily circling your areola and gingerly scraping his teeth over your nipple.

A single suckle follows and that’s all it takes for you to lock your thighs around Mingyu’s head, arching your back and letting out a long moan as you cum suddenly. Your eyes cross as the pleasure washes over you, letting yourself slump backwards on the counter, head hanging off as Mingyu snuffles against your skin and laps at your folds, cleaning up your release.

“Fucking shit,” Mingyu huffs when he finally decides to come up for air. “That was so fucking hot, you’re so fucking hot. And you taste amazing.”

You wheeze out a thanks, Jeonghan’s laugh ringing in your ears is the most evil yet sexiest thing you hear over your own breathing.

“Speaking of taste…” he trails off and doesn’t say anything else before you feel him on your other nipple and you jolt, head raising to look at him. He swirls another dollop of frosting on you, gesturing to Mingyu. The taller man doesn’t even question it as he leans down to pop your tit into his mouth.

“Oh!” you gasp as his tongue swirls around your nipple, moving round in a circle before sucking. Even when the frosting is gone, he stays latched to your chest and you’re squirming underneath him. Jeonghan attaches his mouth to your other side, smearing frosting from your nipple and up your breast, all the way to your collarbone. His tongue cleans up your nipple before his tongue is licking up, up, up to clean the sticky sugar off of you.

Mingyu sits up, letting go of your tit with a wet pop and reaches to grab the spoon of frosting from Jeonghan. He takes a glob and you watch as he draws a shape on your chest and sternum, mind too scrambled from Jeonghan’s licks to tell what it is. When Mingyu is satisfied with what he’s done, he gives you a once over with wide, blown out eyes and then his hungry mouth is on your skin again, cleaning up the mess he made on you slowly and deliberately. He makes sure his teeth scrape every inch of sensitive skin on you as he goes, ending right back at your swollen nipple.

You’re nothing but pants and cries and whimpers as both men do more of the same. Taking turns covering your chest in frosting then licking it off.

Between the heat of the oven and the heat of their mouths and hands that grip your thighs and hips, you’re feeling dizzy and are convinced you’re now dripping onto the tile underneath your body.

Somewhere in the distance you hear your phone ding, eyes snapping open at the possibility that it’s Sooyoung.

“My phone!” You squeak out, wriggling under their holds.

Jeonghan releases your abused skin, heavy lidded eyes look you over before he quickly turns to grab your phone.

“Looks like my sister is at the store. Says she shouldn’t take long and that the accident was clearing up as she finally made it through so she should be home pretty soon.”

Jeonghan reacts to his sister’s message with a thumbs up and rejoins you and his friend.

“Please, need you, one of you, both of you, just someone,” you plead to them. Between your desire to be fucked and the fact that the countdown is on until your best friend will be coming home, you don’t care who does it as long as one of them gets inside you.

“Normally, I’d make you beg for me more and make you wait, but we are in a time crunch,” Jeonghan agrees, looking over your trembling form. “Where do you want us?”

“Don’t care,” you sigh out when Mingyu finally pulls his puffy lips off of you.

He and Jeonghan share a look, clearly deciding who will go where. Just knowing that the two men are having a silent conversation as to which one of them will do what to your body has your thighs rubbing together in clear anticipation. Jeonghan glances at you, smirking at your movements before he’s moving around the island, laying your head back to hang off of it again.

“Here’s what we’ll do, Mingyu will stuff that needy pussy of yours since he’s my guest. Think you can handle sucking me off while he does?”

“Fuck, yes,” you nod eagerly the best you can from your angle, senses tingling at the idea of a new position you’ve never done. “Need something under my neck though,” Jeonghan leaves your side for a moment to grab what looks like his sweatpants. He rolls the fabric up and places it under your head and shoulders for support. Jeongha’s hands caress your face and shoulders, watching as Mingyu gets into position between your legs.

Knowing time is of the essence at this point, strong hands run down your thighs, settling behind your knees to spread them more. You soon fill the blunt, large tip of Mingyu’s dick nudge your entrance and you shudder.

He rubs the bulbous head against your folds, nudging your clit once before slathering himself in your juices and bringing it back to your entrance.

“Ready, babydoll?” he asks, readjusting his hold on the back of your knees.

“Yes, please!” The words barely leave your mouth before Mingyu is pushing in, inch by girthy inch, stretching you slowly as he goes.

“Shit, you’re still so tight,” he mumbles through gritted teeth as he goes slower and slower until he’s finally nestled between your silky walls and his pelvis is almost flush with the back of your thighs.

“She always is, no matter how many times I get her to cum for me,” Jeonghan marvels, eyes locked on where you and Mingyu are joined. He watches as Mingyu pulls back, cock sliding almost all the way out before slamming his hips, pushing a true scream out of your pretty lips. His friend wastes no time in building a fast-pace, sending your body jerking back and forth on the counter so hard, your hands raise above your head for something to find purchase on.

That something turns out to be Jeonghan’s thighs as he moves closer into your space. He helps you ease your head back until it drops back off the edge and he’s standing right in front of your face.

“Open up for me, sweetheart,” he coos down at you and you do as he says, mouth falling open in a loud moan as Mingyu’s cock hits a spot deep inside of you. Jeonghan’s dick, long, curved, and as pretty as the rest of him, eases into your mouth.

Mingyu slows down enough for Jeonghan to comfortably settle in your mouth, giving a few short thrusts. Both men curse under their breaths when they listen to the gagging sound that comes out of you as Jeonghan’s length hits the back of your throat.

“Tap my thigh twice if it’s too much, okay baby?” Jeonghan says to you and you tap his thigh once to let him know you heard him. “Good girl. Gonna fuck this pretty little mouth now, okay?” Your response is muffled, but it's affirmative and that’s all Jeonghan needs to begin moving his hips, the tip of his dick hitting the back of your throat again and again with slow, languid thrusts. The deliberate pace allows you to steady your breathing and shut your eyes to concentrate on taking him.

Soon enough, his thrusts are faster and Mingyu takes this as his cue to resume his movements as well. He doesn’t start as frantic as he did when he first slid into you, but his thrusts are so deep, you can also feel him in your chest. His dick is as big as the rest of him and you’re made aware of that as he stretches every inch of your walls to mold around him.

As soon as both men hear your whines around Jeongha’s length, they look at each other, nodding with a silent understanding of how they’ll fuck you together.

Mingyu’s pace goes from casual to anything but as he begins to drive his hips into yours again. His fingers dig into your hips as he fucks you, keeping you pinned in place as he does to keep you from sliding from the force.

Jeonghan’s gentle hands rest on either side of your head, stroking your cheeks carefully as he fucks your mouth, eyes falling closed as he does.

Your body feels like it’s on fire with both the sensation of your pussy and your mouth being used by both men. Your eyes stay wrenched closed tightly as you seesaw between them, back and forth, back and forth. Your ears can only pick up the wet squelches of your spit around Jeonghan’s cock and the sharp slap of Mingyu’s muscular thighs hitting the back of yours. He still has your legs up and open, pressing himself into you as far as he physically can.

“Fuck, your mouth is fucking heaven, baby,” Jeonghan grunts as he drives his dick back and forth between your lips. He watches the drool pool around your mouth and drip down your face. He thinks he sees tears prick at your lash line too and the sight is nearly enough to have him explode right on the spot, but he holds back, wanting you to cum first.

Mingyu lets out a string of curses as he buries himself deeper, eyes fixated on the sight of his cock disappearing and reappearing in you, covered in a white ring of both of your juices. His eyes slide over to the bowl of frosting, still sitting on the counter and he reaches over, scooping more out to rub on your chest again. His pace falters a little as he leans over your body to lick you clean again and you let out a long, drawn out moan around Jeonghan as his red hot tongue licks fire across your sensitive skin.

Jeonghan follows his lead, but instead of covering you in the pink, sticky sweetness, he pulls his dick out of your mouth and smears it on your lips and down his dick instead.

“Baby didn’t get to taste it,” he murmurs so low that it sounds as if he’s almost talking to himself. When he slides himself back into your mouth, the sugary sweet flavor mixes with the heavy, salty taste of his precum and you excitedly accept as he plunges all the way down your throat. You relax and relish in the broken, almost desperate cry that he lets out when you swallow around him. “Shit! Just like that, sweetheart. You’re so fucking good to me,” You preen under the praise and do it again, only getting sidetracked up when Mingyu snaps his hips particularly hard as the same time that he bites down on one of your nipples.

A choked squeal is heard around Jeonghan’s length and both men feel their ends fast approaching.

“Fucking hell, babydoll. You close?” Mingyu asks against your sticky skin, biting and sucking at any of you that he can get his mouth on.

“Mmhmm!” you attempt to answer, which you can before Jeonghan’s dick is obstructing your airway again.

They hear you, though, and both reach out to make you cum first. Mingyu’s fingers toy with your clit, the pad of his thumb digging in to rub harsh circles as Jeonghan’s hot digits wrap around one of your nipples, tugging and pinching.

Your body jumps at the dual sensations, the feelings quickly becoming too much when paired with the sheer fullness you feel on both ends and in every fiber of your being. You feel yourself start to twitch harder, your hands still on Jeonghan’s thighs gripping him tighter as your nails dig into his skin. He hisses above you, all of you hearing the ding from your phone across the room which can only mean Sooyoung is on her way home.

The thought only lingers for a moment before Mingyu gives you a thrust that is just the perfect amount of pressure against your sensitive walls to have your back arching, a yell of what sounds like his name garbles out of you around Jeonghan’s length. The vibrations from your sounds are like a switch for Jeonghan, his body reacting immediately to yours and the way you swallow him almost all the way down as you cry out and cum.

He snaps his hips once more before he’s releasing, cumming down your throat then pulling out, some of his release spurting onto your lips, chin, and neck. You don’t even seem to notice, your eyes open but your attention elsewhere as Mingyu continues bullying his cock into your hypersensitive pussy.

Mingyu cums last, pulling out of your messy folds with a whine. He strokes himself once, twice, and then he’s cumming hard, his release spurting onto your thighs, painting your sweaty skin in white warmth.

The three of you slump in silence, breathing heavily as you clear your heads and get a grip. You feel something prodding your leg and with a heavy head, you manage to lift far enough to see Mingyu rubbing his softening length in the mess he made on your thigh. Clearing your throat to get his attention, he snaps his eyes up to you and stops, smiling sheepishly.

“Sorry,” he coughs. “It’s just…that was so fucking hot,” he repeats again and you can’t help but nod.

“Yeah,” you croak, making both of the men snicker at you. You reach a hand back weakly to swat at Jeonghan who dodges your half-assed attack.

“Here, let's get you cleaned up while we have time,” he says, glancing at the timer above the oven. Your cupcakes have ten minutes left and if he had to estimate, it would take that time plus a little longer before his sister gets home. He and Mingyu both help you sit up with Mingyu grabbing your hands to pull and Jeonghan cradling your head and neck to lift you up. Your joints groan in protest, but you manage to sit up.

Jeonghan moves to grab a paper towel, wetting it with warm water before he’s in front of you, wiping his drying spunk off of your face. Mingyu does the same, and cleans up what’s dried on your thigh.

“Ugh, I feel like I have to take a shower,” you sigh, aware of the uncomfortable sensation on the rest of your skin. Dried spit from both men along with remnants of the now useless pink frosting still smatter over you and you crinkle your nose.

“If you want, you can take a shower and I’ll keep an eye on the oven,” Jeonghan offers as he and Mingyu help you stand on shaky legs. The two of them gather their pants and your clothes as you lean against the counter slowly regaining strength in your body.

“Taking a random shower doesn’t seem suspicious to you?” you question, raising an eyebrow as you gesture to your phone, which Mingyu grabs to hand to you.

“If Sooyoung gets home, we can just say you got stuff on your clothes and you had to shower. I have extra clothes on me you can wear when you get out.” Mingyu offers.

“Yeah, and we’ll even throw your clothes in the washer real quick and she’ll never know!” Jeonghan looks around the kitchen before grabbing the now infamous bowl of strawberry frosting. He stares at it hard before eyeing the kitchen floor and tossing the bowl with enough force to shatter when it hits the floor.

“Jeonghan, what the fuck?!” you scream, flinching at the sound of glass breaking.

“I’ll tell her I knocked the bowl over, it broke, got all over you and now you’re showering. Plus, the frosting was dirty anyway now,” he shrugs, a smile playing on the corners of his lips. Part of you is annoyed at the prospect of having to put more work in to recreate the frosting which was the only part of the whole baking process that turned out successful. “When you’re out, Gyu and I will even help you guys so you’re done quicker.” At his suggestion, you quirk an eyebrow at him. “Okay, well mostly Gyu will help, but I’ll help clean up and do little shit or whatever, okay?”

“Deal,” you decide finally, glancing at your phone. Sooyoung will likely be more than halfway home at this point so you don’t have time to think of another plan.

The three of you split up then. You head for the bathroom to shower while Mingyu starts to clean up the bowl and the frosting from the floor. Jeonghan takes your clothes to the washing machine to start the load, then grabs some clothes from Mingyu’s overnight bag in his room for you to change into.

By the time you’re clean, washed, and in Mingyu’s oversized shorts and t-shirt, you can hear Sooyoung in the kitchen.

When you round the corner into the kitchen, three sets of eyes fix on you and Sooyoung rushes over to you. “Y/n, are you okay?! These two morons told me what they did!”

“Yeah, I’m okay. No injuries to report.” You give her a small smile, ignoring the wiggle of Jeonghan’s eyebrows behind her.

“Good. I feel so bad. If you want you don’t have to help anymore. I’ve already taken up your Sunday and forced you over here to work for free and now my idiot brother has ruined your clothes.”

“I’m literally right here,” Jeoghan reminds his sister as he finishes laying out the groceries she brought home.

“Yeah, unfortunately,” Sooyoung grumps, rolling her eyes.

“No, really it’s okay. I’m happy to help and besides, you didn’t ruin my Sunday at all, I promise!” She has no idea how true that statement is, but you manage to reassure her and she eventually nods, believing you, but still saying you can leave at any time.

You set to work helping her begin the batch of chocolate cupcakes as she works on making more strawberry frosting. You truly don’t mind helping, especially if that means you get to share sneaky glances and secret touches with Jeonghan. Today has been anything but a lazy Sunday, but you can’t say you mind too much.

[chryso-poeia]

Intellectual processing and interpreting follows a sequence:

1. You interpret something like a loud noise or something you see, and the way in which you are able to do so (or get to do so) is the function of thoughts. (Prefrontal Cortex & Limbic System)

2. The thought then creates the sensation in the body, which is the same thing as emotion. (Adrenaline, Cortisol, Dopamine, Seratonin, Oxytocin, Endorphins)

3. And then that becomes a feeling when we make it subjective. (Prefrontal Cortex, Insula, Anterior Cingulate Cortex)

-

So you are experiencing a process anchored in the survival instinct. This is why it can be important to audit if you’re actually in danger or not when experiencing anxiety (Crocodile in the room with you… gun to your head.. etc). A traumatized brain will just keep misfiring here if you don’t. This is also why it’s important to understand that it’s the meaning assigned to what you are experiencing that gives it weight or severity. Because what is occuring, is occuring. There’s no way around that. However, it doesn’t have to occur the way you think it does. Again, because emotions are purely sensations in your body, it’s when you give them a distorted, generalized meaning that it becomes problematic. Because your brain naturally deletes what might be positive in the enviournment or in your life. So it’s not that, what is positive isn’t there. You’re just not focusing on it to the extent that you get to experience it.

A layer deeper would argue that everything you experience is only happening within you, due to again, the meaning assigned and due to how you wouldn’t be experiencing the world without your senses and those senses stop at the boundaries of the body. Whereas the meaning you ascribe creates the illusion of extending those sensory sensations out by projection into the future or back into the past, or out into your enviournment. But all you can really know is the present, which is just the present next moment and next moment. Hence also the importance of boundaries with others and yourself. Hence finally also, why it is said that wherever you are, there you are. The present moment collapses the past and the future into it. So lastly, if your survival isn’t directly an issue, your thoughts are just the past repeating itself.

One way to work with this understanding and to reframe it, is the following questions:

1. ”If i’m not directly in danger right now, what becomes irrelevant to focus on right now?”

2. ”What is now left and potentially of use in this reaction from the past repeating itself, in this situation for my greatest good?”.

Summary: ”If i’m not in danger right now, what becomes irrelevant and what does become relevant for me and my greatest good?”

[sinmartini]

"feels so right but it's just so wrong." // red!clark kent

notes: MDNI 18+ summary: clark kent is usually such a nice guy. what's gotten into him? wc: 1714 warnings: red!clark, face fucking with fingers, implications of oral (m receiving), clark being arrogant, pet names, fem!reader, not proofread.

“You are being so annoying,” Red!Clark told you, rolling his eyes as he tucked himself further into the couch settled in the loft. He had been acting so strange all day, completely unlike the best friend you knew and loved. There was a slight attitude in his tone, irritation radiating off of him, and pelting you with nearly everything that had come out of his mouth. It was almost like you were a human punching bag today; if an unkind thought passed through his head, he was more than willing to say it to you.

“What?” You snapped at him, finally nearing the breaking point. Your eyes pointed up at him, shifting your head in his lap to get a better look at you. It wasn’t uncommon to lay your head on his lap, the rest of your body taking up the other end of the couch. Actually, Clark typically liked it when you two did this together. Even though you were just best friends, there was an intrinsic need for you two to be in touch all the time. Hand holding, platonic cuddling, hugs that lasted a minute too long. Today, though… Today he looked frustrated by the way you were clinging to him, the physical touch he had once loved from you be damned. 

Not only had you just experienced something completely terrible, with Clark swooping in to save you at the last minute yet again, but he was being such a jerk.

“I just never realized how needy and clingy you are. What you did back there was dangerous too. Don’t you have any inkling for self preservation?” Clark’s words were one thing, but his actions were indicative of another as he gently stroked his fingers through your hair. 

Was he wrong? Not really. You were needy and clingy when it came to him, but that’s how it’s always been with the two of you. Hell, he was just as clingy most of the time. That’s what came along with knowing his secret; being one of the only people who actually knew the real Clark Kent. 

“Clark, you know I’d do anything for a story. The Daily Planet isn’t going to promote me if I only write boring headlines. I thought that’s why we work so well together? I can bust a crime ring and you’re always there to swoop in.” You were trying to reason with him now, get to the bottom of what was really going on inside of his head. Ever since this morning, it was like Clark had been stripped from all his inhibitions, most of the qualities that made Clark… Well, Clark, had somehow disappeared.

“Good writers can make a story out of anything,” Clark noted, his fingers still stroking through your hair. “They don’t have to put themselves in constant danger and despair to write a think piece.”

“You don’t think I’m a good writer?” You asked him, trying to lift your head from his thigh, needing to create some space between you and your best friend before he could say something that might kill your spirits all together.

“You could be better,” Clark shrugged, his shoulders lifting and collapsing in one cohesive motion as disinterest flickered across his face. You could tell he was done with the conversation now, dishing out that he didn’t think you were that great at what you do, then ready to move on like you weren’t going to have more questions for him.

It wasn’t often that you cried in front of Clark. On the off chance that you did cry in front of him, it was for good reason, and Clark had never made you cry. Until now. The tears that threatened the corner of your waterline were mortifying, and the more you tried to blink them away, the quicker they began formulating. 

Once more, you tried to move yourself off of his lap, but Clark held you in place. Finally, he looked down at you, his facial expression shifting from disinterest to amusement when he saw the tears spilling down your cheeks. There was no way you could have missed the way his lips curled up, just enough to show he enjoyed the sight of you messy on his lap. And there was absolutely no way to miss the way his eyes shimmered with delight, darkening at the sight of your bottom lip quivering.

“You’re crying? C’mon, it wasn’t that mean,” Clark scoffed as his hand found its way from your hair to your chin, holding your face between his thumb and his forefinger. Vulnerability flooded through you as Clark examined every aspect of your face with such intensity, you wanted to shrink under his gaze.

As you opened your mouth, trying to find the words to let Clark know he had been hurting your feelings all day, it wasn’t just this offhand comment that was contributing to your tears, a small sob released from your chest. The words didn’t come out, only heavier breathing and more tears.

“So fussy,” Clark said, his voice sultry and thick as he gently stroked his pointer finger from your chin to your mouth, placing it between your lips and forcing you to open up. You didn’t know why you were being so compliant with it, but Clark pushed his forefinger and middle finger into your mouth, pressing harshly on the middle of  your tongue and you couldn’t help the moan that stirred. “Let me pacify you.”

Your moans were vibrating off of his fingers as he worked them in and out of your mouth, his gaze fixated on you in a way you had never seen before. It wasn’t just lust that filled it eyes; it was carnal desire, like in this moment he needed you as much as you needed him. At least, that is likely what he wanted you to think.

There was something intrinsically hot about the situation as a whole— you laying there, crying on his lap as he hushed you with his fingers in a way that could be written in an erotica book. Nothing about it felt right, but it didn’t feel wrong either, and you could tell Clark felt the same way by the tent growing underneath his jeans, the length of him pressing against the seat of his pants.

Your mouth salivated at the thought of it, creating more lubricant to slide his fingers in and out of your mouth. His eyes traveled to where you were looking, curious as to what had stopped your tears in their tracks and distracted you. A chuckle, deep from his chest sounded, as he realized how desperate you were for it. Part of him had to know, this whole time, that you wanted him in a way that was less than platonic, right?

“Feels so right but it’s just so wrong,” Clark said, reading your mind as he pushed his fingers in deeper. The tip of his finger hit your gag reflex, causing your head to lurch, but he pushed you back down in his lap. The disinterest that flooded his features less than five minutes ago had completely evaporated, now replaced with sheer and utter amusement.

You were so wet, it was uncomfortable. Your core was dripping with desire, soaking into your cotton panties and clinging to you just enough to overwhelm you. With furrowed brows, you tried to talk around Clark’s fingers, and that prior expression of annoyance had returned once more.

“You’re not supposed to be talking, bunny, that’s the point of this. I want you to shut up.” Clark moved his fingers against your tongue once more, pressing and pushing on the insides of your cheeks, carefully grazing the gag reflex every so often in a teasing gesture. He couldn’t help but taunt you, just a bit.

You made a muffled noise, a whine mixed with a moan. Even with his fingers in your mouth, you were still being fussy.

“What?” Clark asked, his tone full of mockery as he offered a sympathetic expression that you knew to be just another one of his taunts. If you weren’t so turned on, you would be trying to figure out what the hell was going on with him, but right now you were too blinded by desire to care— even if that meant Clark was going to mock you the entire time. “You want my cock in your mouth instead? Can’t promise I’ll be nice.”

Your eyes widened and you frantically nodded around his fingers. He didn’t need to see more before he was unbuttoning his pants as you gently lifted your head to allow him to kick them off.

But as soon as Clark’s pants were off, his expression had shifted completely. The mocking expression was now laced with confusion, the evidence of what you were about to get into pressed against the hem of his boxers. 

It was hard for him to look you in the eyes, and you weren’t sure why the sudden shift in demeanor until he asked you, “can you empty out the pockets of my jeans?”

You moved off the couch, picking up his jeans and shuffling through the pockets, feeling silly with the dried tears on your face and Clark’s seeming lack of interest in you now. In the very bottom of his right pocket, there was one ruby earring. You placed it in your palm, showing it to him and that’s when it hit you both.

“Red kryptonite,” Clark said definitively and you thought you could melt right there. His behavior had a reason behind it, yours was driven by pure desire. “I thought it was a ruby earring. I found it at the Talon and was going to turn it into their lost and found.”

“Oh god,” you said, dropping the earring on the floor of the loft. Your feet were moving down the stairs, bolting for the exit before your brain could catch up with you.

Clark stood at the top of the stairs, his half hard dick still swinging in his boxers, “Wait! Let’s talk about this. Please.”

Slowly, with one hand on the door, you turned around to look at him, avoiding looking below the waist. Maybe you two could work things out. In more ways than one.

[ctrlsht]

Beneath His Love | Jungkook Two-Shot AU (Part 1)

pairing: jungkook x reader genre: dark romance, psychological thriller, soft yandere

summary: Jeon Jungkook was once just a foreign high school friend until he disappeared without a word after graduation. Years later, he came back, not just to reconnect, but to claim a place in your life as your lover. To everyone else, your relationship is something out of a fairytale, the kind others envy. And for a while, you believed it too until the mask he wore began to slip, revealing a side of him you never saw coming.

warnings: emotional and psychological manipulation, control and possessiveness, obsession, anxiety and mild distress, isolation and coercion, themes of entrapment wc: 14k

Your high school years hold some of your best memories. You were young, maybe a little naïve, but you enjoyed every moment. You met friends who stuck with you through the ups and downs, creating memories that stayed with you.

Some friendships lasted, while others naturally faded over time. But out of all the people from your past, the last person you expected to return was Jeon Jungkook.

“I really want to drive you home, but I thought you might have your car with you.” He glances at you, a slight smile tugging at his lips as he bites his bottom one.

You catch the gesture, a smile of your own creeping up before you glance back at the office building.

He’s a new investor in the company you’re working for, and the funny thing is, you met him in the meeting, with no heads-up that he was the person you’d be negotiating with.

Back in high school, you would’ve called him a lost puppy; out of place, unsure. He had just moved from South Korea with his family, thrown into a world of unfamiliar faces and an unfamiliar language. He tried, really tried, but somehow, nothing ever quite fit.

He wasn’t a natural at blending in, and the harder he pushed, the more obvious it became that he just didn’t belong.

But you did. You were the one who made him feel like he could stay like he was already part of something. You made sure he never had to face the feeling of being lost alone.

“I might get embarrassed for saying this, but... I don’t have a car.” You say it so casually, you can’t help but bite the inside of your cheek to stifle a laugh. His face lights up almost instantly.

“Well, that’s good news for me, because I can drive you home.” He grins, and you can’t help but to chuckle.

Comparing him now to his high school self? It’s almost unrecognizable. From his new confidence to the way he holds himself, he’s changed. Completely. It’s hard to believe this is the same guy. But then again, you were there at the meeting. 

The one thing that hasn’t changed? The way he feels familiar. Comfortable. Even after all these years apart, that sense of ease with him hasn’t gone anywhere. 

It’s almost laughable to think back on Jungkook who once barely spoke in class, who could barely look anyone in the eye. The same Jungkook who now talks business with the Chief Finance Officer of the country’s biggest infrastructure company; and he’s an investor. An investor. You read the reports. From the looks of it, he’s about to become one of the company’s largest backers. You’re still wrapping your mind around it. What exactly does he do now?

Jungkook left after high school. No warning. No goodbye. Just... gone. You tried searching for him, trying to catch some trace of him online, but even his barely-used social media vanished. After a year of wondering what happened, you eventually gave up. Maybe that was his choice all along.

But you can’t shake the thought: Did you ever really become his friend? Did you make him feel like he belonged, like he had a place? You thought you had, but it’s hard to tell. Maybe it never felt the same to him.

And now, as he stands before you, all those unanswered questions bubble up. So many things you want to ask, but you don’t even know where to begin.

You admit that part of you feels a little hurt, like maybe your friendship meant nothing to him. But that feeling? It’s faded. You were young and confused back then. It doesn’t matter now. You know, deep down, he had his reasons for disappearing. And that’s enough for you.

“It’s good to see you again, Y/N.” He says it casually, but there’s warmth behind the words. You glance at him as he drives, a small smile on his face, his attention fully on the road. You can’t help but notice how much he’s changed. It’s not just his look; it’s everything about him now. The confidence he exudes to the ease in his posture. This isn’t the same Jungkook from high school. He used to shy away from meeting your gaze for more than a few seconds, and now, you can hardly believe he’s the one offering you a ride home. Back in high school, it was you who’d offer to walk him home whenever your other friends couldn’t.

“You too,” you reply, smiling back, still watching him.

He doesn’t speak after that, and you both settle in silence as the car hums along the road. There’s something comforting about the silence. No awkwardness, no tension, just his presence beside you. It feels easy.

After a while, you break the silence. “How have you been?” The words come out before you can second-guess yourself. You didn’t want the quiet to stretch on, and this might be your only chance to check up on him.

“I’m good,” he replies, his tone flat but steady. You expected that. It’s the default answer people give when asked how they’re doing. But you were hoping for something more. Something real.

You don’t push for more. Maybe this is all he’s willing to share. But just as you're about to settle back into your thoughts, his voice breaks through.

“I missed you.”

The words hang in the air. His eyes seem far away, like he’s seeing something just beyond reach. The warmth around him has shifted, and for a moment, the easy atmosphere between you both feels heavier.

“Yeah, me too, Kook,” you say softly, offering a small smile in an attempt to lighten the mood. “I just wish you’d tell me more about how you’ve been.”

The car rolls up to your apartment building, the conversation trailing off as you prepare to get out. You almost feel like you should’ve said more, but before you can even voice your thoughts, he speaks again.

“Do you have anything to do tomorrow evening?”

You blink, caught off guard by the sudden question. He smirks, amused by your surprise, but before he can say anything else, you cut him off.

“None. Why?” you ask, trying to play it cool, as if you don’t know the answer.

“I was hoping to take you out for dinner, Y/N. It’s been years, and I know I owe you an apology and an explanation.”

You purse your lips, but you fight the smile, pretending to be annoyed. “Good that you know.”

He chuckles, and without another word, he steps out to open the door for you.

The dinner went exactly as planned. It’s Saturday night, and you’re still in disbelief that you’re sitting across from Jungkook after a decade, the same familiar ease between you both. The bond hasn’t shifted; it feels just like it did back then. Can that really be possible?

You never expected that, in a series of random days, you'd reconnect with your long-lost friend and pick up right where you left off, surprisingly comfortable, like no time had passed at all.

To sum up his story, Jungkook left the country a week after graduation due to family matters. He didn’t get into the details, just mentioned family and wealth, and honestly, you didn’t push for more. It didn’t matter. What mattered was that he was here, now.

“Investing? That’s it?” you asked casually, curious about his line of work as you took a sip of your wine.

“Yeah. Why? You sound like you’re doubting me,” he said, narrowing his eyes playfully as he cut into his steak. You quickly shook your head, laughing.

“No, no— I’m not doubting you. It’s just... how do you just invest in a company? What else do you do?”

His lips twitched as if holding back a laugh before he took a bite of his steak.

“With me, it’s possible.”

It’s amazing how much had changed for him. From his fluent English to how smoothly he communicated, he had a way of speaking now; confident and clear. He knew what to talk about and when to hold back. He even went into detail about his business, explaining how he went from nothing to having it all. Apparently, he’s rich rich.

It still blows your mind. He doesn’t just invest locally, but globally, with major stakes in several countries. One of his biggest investments? A multinational tech company in the USA. You googled his name later, and the results were overwhelming; articles, interviews, and profiles. It hit you then: you had no idea.

“I saw Jungkook recently. He’s freaking rich!” you said during a video call with your high school friends on a random Friday evening.

“Oh my god, you did? I thought you knew, Y/N. He’s always in the business news!” Mina, your entrepreneur friend, exclaimed.

“Yeah, I thought you knew too, since you were close to him,” Chloe added as she applied her makeup.

“I would’ve known if you told me,” you said, sarcastically. They all laughed, including Henry, the only guy in your friend group.

They all knew Jungkook, but they were never really close to him. But you try to get them to hang out with him. It was hard, though. He never seemed to fit in with anyone else. He wasn’t exactly open to making friends outside of you.

You didn’t mind being his only friend, but there were times you wished you could hang out with your whole circle without worrying about leaving him alone. You can’t stomach seeing him being alone.

Your first dinner with him turned into another, and then another, until it reached a point where you were seeing him almost every day. Well, it makes sense. He has back-to-back meetings with the CEO and CFO, all to discuss investment deals and company performance. You were shocked when you found out he’d become one of the company’s major shareholders. But, honestly, you shouldn’t have been surprised. With his global investments, your company was just one of many he had stakes in.

You’ve sat through countless meetings with him, being the Investor Relations Analyst, but what truly catches you off guard is how he shifts between playful and serious. Outside the boardroom, he’s relaxed and fun, but the moment he steps into the business world, he’s a different beast; focused, no-nonsense, and damn good at what he does.

“I still can’t believe how different you are in the boardroom. Your 17-year-old self must be so proud,” you joked one time when he invited you over for dinner at his place. You had to add, his “place” wasn’t just any apartment. It was a goddamn penthouse, bigger than your office floor.

His penthouse is airy, with massive windows letting in all the natural light and giving a breathtaking view of the city below. The furniture is minimal; soft neutrals, a simple sofa, a coffee table, and a few essentials. But none of that matters because you can’t wrap your head around how massive his place is.

It’s your third time visiting, and you still haven’t gotten used to how much wealth he’s surrounded by. Back in high school, you knew he had a solid life, but this, this level of luxury? You never imagined it. Sure, his family’s wealth played a part, but it was his own hustle that built the wealth he’s sitting on now. He mentioned once that part of the reason he went back to Korea was for his family’s business, but he didn’t go into detail.

“You really can’t stop talking about how different I am now, can you?” he teased as he smiled, removing his coat and loosening his tie. Both of you came straight from the meeting, and here you were again, in his penthouse. You shook your head, unable to stop smiling. 

“You’ve definitely changed,” you shrugged playfully as he walked to the kitchen island to prep dinner. 

“I plan to cook kimchi stew. You mentioned that you want me to cook it again.” he said, pulling out the ingredients one by one.

“Ah, you remembered,” you smiled, feeling a bit giddy. “Do you need help?”

He flashed that smile of his, shaking his head. “Nah. You relax. Dinner’s on me.”

“I really do want to help, though,” you said, walking over to him. “You always cook for us.”

He stared at you for a moment, a soft smile tugging at his lips, before nodding and grabbing the tofu and green onions.

“Alright, fine,” he chuckled. “You can slice these.” He placed them on the counter, then grabbed an apron and slowly slipped it over your head.

Your heart started to race, feeling the warmth of his hands as they adjusted the straps around your back. You barely breathed as he tied the apron, feeling like an electric current shot through you when his hand grazed your skin.

“While you do that, I’ll prepare the kimchi,” he said, turning around with a grin before walking to the fridge.

With his back to you, as he chopped the kimchi, you were frozen. You could feel your heart hammering, and your stomach doing flips, but you couldn’t move an inch. What the hell was happening to you?

There’s this strange flutter in your stomach, something you can’t quite put into words. You don’t move, not until he finally glances back at you. You flash a quick, awkward smile, trying to shake off the odd tension before turning your focus to the tofu, hoping it’ll distract you from the feeling you can't shake.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

Henry’s birthday party was in full swing at one of the biggest clubs in the city. Nothing new there. Clubbing was pretty much a tradition whenever you and your friends had extra cash to burn. The last time you went was a work event, which sucked because most of your coworkers were too old to actually enjoy the club. Tonight, though? Different story. The music was loud, the drinks were flowing, and you were exactly where you wanted to be; wrapped around Chloe’s shoulder, screaming lyrics at the top of your lungs.

Feeling a bit worn out, you drop into a seat, chugging your drink while mindlessly scrolling through your phone. Three messages from Jungkook. One missed call.

Jungkook: Wanna have dinner tonight? We can do it at your place since you’re fussing about me not visiting your place hahaha

Jungkook: Heyyy?

Jungkook: Oh, I didn’t know you were with your friends. Sorry to bother you.

Shit. You checked the timestamps, first message at 7 PM, second at 9 PM, and the last one just fifteen minutes ago. The missed call? Right after the second text.

How did he even know you were out? You clicked on your Instagram story. Viewed. Of course.

You quickly typed out a response, apologizing for not replying sooner.

Jungkook: No worries, Y/N 🙂

That’s when it hit you, almost everyone from high school was here, even the ones who barely talked to Henry. But Jungkook wasn’t. You scanned the crowd before glancing back at your phone, staring at his last message.

Should you feel bad? Maybe. He used to hang out with your group sometimes, but Henry was the one throwing the party. You couldn’t exactly tell him who to invite. Still, a small part of you felt guilty. Jungkook had been a part of your high school life, and it felt weird that he wasn’t here too.

“Y/N, what’s up with you? You’re spacing out,” Mina suddenly appeared beside you.

“Nothing,” you said, forcing a smile.

She peeked at your phone. “Who are you texting?”

“No one, just reading a message from Jungkook,” you answered, locking your screen. “By the way, did Henry invite everyone from high school?”

Mina shrugged. “I guess?” 

“Did he invite Jungkook?”

“I doubt it.”

“Why?”

Mina chimed in, laughing. “Girl, he’s a fucking millionaire. You really think he has time for this?”

Your jaw tightened. “You guys used to hang out with him at least once.”

She raised a brow. “Then ask Henry, not me.” She patted your back before disappearing into the crowd.

You sighed, staring at Jungkook’s last message. Maybe Mina was right. He probably didn’t care about not being invited. He had more important things to do than go clubbing with his former high school classmates. But another part of you wasn’t so sure.

Your phone buzzed again.

Jungkook: You must be having fun, leaving me on read hahaha

Oh, fuck.

You: Hahaha I’m sorry. I’m trying to sober up. What are you doing

Jungkook: You’re drunk already? Who are you going home with?

You: I’m good haha I’m going home with my friends. Let’s have dinner tomorrow.

Jungkook: How are you going home with them if they’re also drunk?

You weren’t drunk, just tipsy. But if Jungkook thought you were drunk, then maybe you’d actually get drunk trying to prove otherwise.

Jungkook: Do you want me to fetch you?

You: It’s okay, Kook. I can manage. My friends aren’t drunk. We’re fine.

No reply. You reread your messages, sipping your whiskey, assuming he’d drop it. But then—

Jungkook: I’ll go there and wait until you’re done so I can drive you home.

Your stomach did a weird flip. You don’t know what or how to feel. There are a lot of thoughts that are running in your head and you don’t know what to entertain first.

It had been almost a year since you started hanging out again, and you weren’t going to lie, you liked the way he looked after you. How he always checked in, insisted on driving you so you wouldn’t have to take the bus, how he cooked for you without you even asking. Hell, you’d eat anything he made, even dishes you normally hated. There was something about his effort, his presence, that made your heart race just a little.

And now, he was coming to pick you up.

But then there was the other part, the part where he’d be stepping into a club full of his old high school classmates who didn’t even think to invite him. It didn’t sit right with you. If he came here, would it remind him of how things used to be? Would it make him feel out of place?

There was no way in hell you were going to make him wait around for you to finish partying in a place he should’ve been invited to in the first place.

You took a deep breath and texted back:

You: Okay.

Then you locked your phone, downed the rest of your drink, and got up to rejoin your friends. Might as well enjoy the last few moments before Jungkook arrived.

“I have to go soon, Henry,” you lied. “Charlie’s home. He might wake up looking for me.” You added, using your nephew as an excuse. 

Henry frowned. “You never said you were babysitting tonight. That sucks. I’ll grab my keys and—”

You cut him off. “No need. Jungkook’s driving me home.”

Henry stopped, then smirked. “Wow. Are you dating him already? You should’ve invited him.”

You rolled your eyes. “You’re the birthday boy. That was your job, not mine.”

The moment your friends heard you were leaving, they wasted no time plotting your downfall. Before you could even argue, Henry was in front of you, bottle in hand, while Chloe grabbed your head like a coach hyping up their star player, and Mina? She was already recording.

"One last shot! Well, bottle, for the road!" Henry announced, grinning like a devil.

You groaned, but resistance was pointless. The moment the bottle tilted, the cheers erupted around you. The burn hit instantly, but damn, it felt good. Who knew last-minute drinking could be this satisfying?

It only took Jungkook 15 minutes to get there. As soon as he texted that he’d arrived, you wasted no time saying your goodbyes. You didn’t really want to leave yet, but making him wait for the party to end at 6 a.m. wasn’t an option. It was barely 1 a.m., and the night was just getting started, but you weren’t about to let him stand around outside just for your sake.

Stepping out of the club, the pounding bass faded behind you, but the street was still alive with music, neon lights, and crowds spilling out of bars. It was a Saturday night, prime time for people to party, and leaving early kind of sucked.

You hadn’t even replied to Jungkook’s last message, but it wasn’t hard to spot him. He was leaning against his car, parked right in front of the club, eyes glued to his phone. Just as you were about to call out to him, your phone buzzed. His name lit up the screen.

The moment he heard the ringtone, he looked up, and when his eyes landed on you, his whole face lit up, his smile stretching wide. You laughed, shaking your head. This man.

“Did you miss me that much?” you teased, walking over.

“You weren’t answering my texts,” he shot back, grinning as he slipped his phone into his back pocket.

“I figured I’d just answer you in person,” you said with a chuckle, opening the passenger door. “Let’s go?”

“Wait, you’re actually done for the night?” he asked, surprised.

“Yeah. I sobered up, and I’m not really in the mood to drink anymore, so I might as well head home,” you shrugged before sliding into the car.

“You sure? Henry might be pissed you’re leaving early,” he said, settling into the driver’s seat.

“Nah, trust me, he won’t,” you laughed, clicking your seatbelt.

Jungkook reached behind his seat and pulled out a bottle of water, twisting off the cap before handing it to you.

“Here. Drink some water. Stay hydrated.” He gave you a small smile, and for some reason, it completely threw you off. You should take the water, but your body wouldn’t budge. Your fingers twitched, and your mind screamed at you to move, but all you could do was stare, caught in the moment, caught in him.

And before you could think twice, you leaned in.

His lips met yours, warm and soft, and everything else faded. A little water spilled from the bottle onto your thigh, but you barely noticed. All you could focus on was the way he felt against you, the way your heart pounded like a drum in your chest.

Your head swayed slightly, the tequila still messing with your balance, but you weren’t sure if it was the alcohol or just the way his lips tasted.

Then it hit you.

Your eyes snapped open, and you jerked back, hand flying to your mouth.

“Shit—sorry—”

Before you even finished your sentence, he pulled you towards him, pressing his lips on yours. He pulled you so close, his hand wrapped around your nape, gently holding you in place, and you melted into the kiss, closing your eyes.

His lips moved against yours hungrily, and the realization sent a shiver down your spine. Your fingers found their way to his hair, gripping it lightly. 

Jungkook broke the kiss, breathing heavily as he leaned his forehead against yours. His fingers found the back of your head, his touch so gentle that it sent shivers down your spine.

“I’m sorry, Y/N,” he murmured, as you shook your head. 

“I should be the one saying sorry.” You chuckled a little. He smiled, rubbing your cheek gently with his thumb. 

He leaned in, his lips grazing yours before he claimed your lips in a slow, sensual kiss. It was different from the previous ones, more controlled yet passionate. His free hand moved to cup your face, his fingers tracing small circles on your cheek, and you felt your body melt into his touch.

Everything blurred together in a rush, you were in the car, and the next, the city lights flickered past as Jungkook drove in silence. It wasn’t until he pulled into a familiar parking garage that reality sank in.

You were supposed to be heading home, but instead, you found yourself in front of his apartment building. 

Maybe his place was closer to the club. It made sense.

Jungkook parked the car in the underground parking lot of his apartment building, the engine purring to a stop. You were both panting heavily, the atmosphere inside the car was filled with tension. He turned to look at you, his gaze intense and darkened with desire.

"We should go upstairs." He said softly.

As soon as the door slams shut behind them, Jungkook pulls you close, his hands gripping your hips tightly. Your bodies are pressed up against each other, and the heat between you is intense.

He kisses you hungrily, his tongue slipping into your mouth as he backs you up against the wall. Your fingers clutch at his shirt, removing the fabric in your grip as you try to bring him even closer.

Then he breaks the kiss, his breathing heavy as he leans his forehead against yours.

He took a deep breath, his fingers still gripping your hips tightly. His eyes roamed your face, taking in every detail, and his gaze fixed on your eyes.

“I like you, Y/N. Even before.” He said, almost sounding like a whisper, but it sounded so clear. 

With a swift motion, he lifted you, wrapping your legs around his waist. You were surprised at the sudden movement, but he held you tightly. He carried you towards the living room, his lips finding your neck as he continued to press hot kisses on your skin.

His apartment windows stretched across the room, but the city lights outside barely reached in, leaving most of the space cloaked in shadow.

He gently placed you on the couch, his body lingers above yours, arms locking you in.

His lips found yours again, his tongue exploring your mouth as if he couldn't get enough of you. His body pressed against yours, leaving no space between you, and you could feel the heat radiating from him.

Your fingers gripped his biceps, your nails biting into his flesh as you tried to hold back the sounds threatening to escape your lips. His mouth continued to explore your neck, his kisses and gentle bites sending waves of pleasure through you.

Jungkook quickly removed your dress before pushing you back onto the couch and capturing your lips in a deep, passionate kiss. Your hands roamed freely along each other's bodies, as he trailed kisses down your neck.

You couldn’t quite piece together the exact steps you took to end up here, but damn, you weren’t complaining. Everything felt perfect, from the way he touched you to the way he spoke to you. And even as your mind wandered, wondering if you'd regret any of it later, you shoved that thought aside. For now, you were savoring every single moment.

You woke up to sunlight streaming through the window, too bright, almost blinding. You blinked a few times, trying to shake off the haze of sleep, only to realize that this wasn’t your room. You didn’t need to check to know exactly where you were. The familiar warmth beside you told you everything you needed to know.

Your gaze lingered on him. Jungkook, still asleep, lying on his stomach. Both of you were tangled under a duvet, skin against skin, the night’s events replaying in your mind. It had been unexpected, but you weren’t regretting it. Not one bit. Out of all the men in your life, he was the one who’d made you feel truly at ease during the most intimate moment.

You couldn’t stop thinking about what he said last night. His words still echoed in your ears.

“I like you, Y/N.”

You reached out, gently brushing his hair, feeling the smooth strands between your fingers. You couldn’t help but feel a little foolish for not noticing how he’d felt before, but now, it didn’t matter. You weren’t going to waste time overanalyzing his feelings.

But damn, if you had known sooner...

You couldn’t help but laugh at the thought. Would you have really done things differently? Probably not. Maybe back in high school, there was nothing there. But now? With how ridiculously handsome and damn near perfect he looked? Hell, you couldn’t deny it.

Life is simple, and so is your relationship with Jungkook.

After that night, there was no overthinking, no awkward tension. You both just went with it. Dating him felt natural, almost effortless. And let’s be real, you weren’t about to let him fuck you if it wasn’t going to lead somewhere.

It still blows your mind how much things have changed in just a year. You reconnected with an old high school friend, found out he’s stupidly rich, and now? You’re dating him. 

You thought dating Jungkook wouldn’t feel much different from being his friend, but damn, you were wrong. In the best way possible.

Every morning, without fail, he texts you a sweet “good morning,” even when he’s miles away on a business trip. He brings you little gifts just because, takes you out on weekly dates, and surprises you with flowers for no reason at all. Even when he’s drowning in work, he always makes time for you, whether it’s at his place or yours. And most especially, he really knows how to make you feel good. He already knows what you love to do and what’s not. He knows when to stop and when to go on. Sometimes, he feels so perfect that you catch yourself wondering if he’s even real.

One morning, after spending the night at his place (which, at this point, is almost every night), you wake up to the soft press of his lips against your skin.

“Morning, love,” he murmurs, fingertips brushing your cheek.

You mumble a sleepy, “Morning.”

“I have to go. I’ll see you tomorrow morning.” He peppers kisses along your face, neck, and arms.

You groan a little, still half-asleep, but you knew this was coming. He’s heading to a business conference out of town, just for the day, but it still sucks that he’s leaving on your day off. You had already planned to head back to your own place anyway, clean up, and maybe just exist in your own space for a while.

“Mm-kay,” you mumble, trying to bury yourself back into the sheets. But Jungkook, being Jungkook, doesn’t stop kissing you, making it impossible to stay asleep. You finally cracked an eye open, shooting him an annoyed look, and making him laugh.

“You should wake up now. I made you breakfast. Eat before it gets cold,” he says, dropping a kiss on your forehead before heading toward the door. “Bye, love. I love you.”

Still groggy, you nod. “I love you too. Take care.”

Once he’s gone, you follow through with your plan, breakfast, then heading home.

The second you step inside your apartment, it’s painfully obvious you haven’t been around much. It smells like it’s been abandoned, and the state of it isn’t much better—clothes piled on your bed, untouched documents scattered across the dining table. A mess, but a familiar one.

As much as you love staying with Jungkook, there’s something comforting about being in your own space. No one to answer to, no one to accommodate, just you, doing whatever the hell you want. Jungkook has asked you to move in with him more times than you can count, but you always say no. Not because you don’t love being with him, but because you love having a place that’s yours. A space to retreat to when you just need to be alone.

The only thing you hadn’t planned for today was your friends ambushing you with an invite to go out tonight.

Your friend group never really schedules hangouts; it just sort of happens. You could go weeks, even a month, without a single message, and then, out of nowhere, someone’s in the mood for a drink or dinner, and suddenly, it’s a plan. Not everyone always makes it, of course. Life gets in the way. But when the stars align and most of you are free, you all try your best to show up.

"Come on, Y/N," Mina whined through the phone. "The last time we saw you was four months ago. And don’t even try to make excuses, you literally just said you’re at home."

You groaned, throwing yourself onto the couch. "Mina, I just spent all day cleaning. I’m exhausted."

"Then we’ll just invite ourselves over!" She laughed, knowing exactly how to push your buttons.

"What the hell, no! I’m not letting you guys trash my place after I spent the whole day making it spotless!"

"Then get dressed and come out with us!" she shot back. "Dinner and drinks. We miss you."

She wasn’t wrong. You missed them too. You’d skipped out on a lot of meet-ups lately—not intentionally, but between work and, well, spending nearly all your free time with Jungkook, your social life had definitely taken a hit. The only time you weren’t with him was when you were at the office.

So, after some back and forth, you gave in. You sent Jungkook a quick text letting him know you were heading out with your friends, though he hadn’t responded yet. He was probably still busy with his conference.

Now, almost 9 p.m., you were sitting in a pub downtown, catching up with your friends over drinks. The place was buzzing with weekend energy, and despite the last-minute plans, it felt good to be here.

“Even though I try to convince myself that we still have something left, I just don’t feel it anymore,” Chloe admitted, swirling her drink in her hand. The conversation had taken a turn toward her struggling relationship. Everyone listened intently.

“We’ve both gotten so caught up in our own responsibilities that we barely connect anymore," she continued, her voice even, like she had already made peace with it.

You studied her face, searching for some sign of heartbreak, but she just looked… tired. Maybe even indifferent.

Chloe was a fashion model, and her boyfriend was a marine engineer. Their lives had been moving in different directions for a while now. The long distance, the fading feelings, it had all been dragging on for too long.

“If you’re not happy, why stay?” Mina asked, echoing what everyone was probably thinking. "This has been going on for two years, Chloe. Maybe it’s time to let go. We’re not getting any younger."

The weight of the conversation made you pause.

It got you thinking about Jungkook. About your relationship.

You’d been with him for half a year now, and honestly, things had been good. No major problems, no doubts. Just happiness. Just him.

But how long would it stay that way?

What would your problems even be? What could you possibly fight about? Could your love for him fade the way Chloe’s did for her boyfriend?

The thought unsettled you.

Before you could get lost in it, your phone rang. The table fell silent as everyone glanced at you. You quickly grabbed it, checking the caller ID.

Jungkook.

You excused yourself and stepped outside, pressing the phone to your ear.

"Hey, Kook," you greeted softly, staring down at your feet.

“You’re out?” His voice was calm, but there was something off about it.

"I sent you a message," you said, glancing through the pub’s window at your friends. "I’m with my friends."

“I’m at your place.”

Your breath hitched. "I thought you were coming home tomorrow?"

"The conference ended at seven. I decided to drive back instead of staying overnight." His tone was flat, unreadable.

“Oh.” You fidgeted with the hem of your top.

“I came straight to your apartment, thinking you’d be there,” he added. “But you weren’t.”

You hesitated. "Mina invited us out. It was last minute, but everyone was free, so…"

"I didn’t see your message until I got here."

You weren’t sure where this was going, but before you could say anything, he spoke again.

"Are you heading home soon?" His voice was calm, but you could sense the impatience laced within it.

"I'm… not sure," you admitted, just as Henry stepped outside, lighting a cigarette. 

"Who are you talking to?" Henry asked casually.

"Jungkook," you said, turning your back to him. “I think we’ll end at ten or eleven. Depends on their mood.” You added to Jungkook.

Henry took a drag of his cigarette, chuckling. "Chloe wants to go clubbing after this. We’ll probably be out past eleven."

You shot him an annoyed look. "Move away. I don’t want to inhale your cigarette."

He just laughed, stepping back into the pub.

"I'm not sure what time this will end," you told Jungkook. "If you want, you can rest in my room. I just cleaned everything." You tried to lighten the mood, but he sighed on the other end.

“Y/N, it’s late. You should rest. You’ve had a long day.”

His voice was gentle, but something about it felt off.

"I’ll be home before eleven," you promised. "You should rest too."

“I’ll just pick you up.”

You blinked. "No, it’s fine. Henry said he’d drive me home."

Silence. Then—

“Really?” His voice dripped with sarcasm.

You frowned. "What?"

“I don’t know. Just doesn’t sit right with me. The idea of you letting another man drive you home while your boyfriend is literally waiting at your place.”

You sighed, frustration creeping in. "Jungkook, it’s Henry. You know him."

"Okay then," he said, the edge in his voice sharp enough to cut. "I’ll just rest. Bye."

And then he hung up.

You stared at your phone, stunned.

The hell was that?

Jungkook was never the jealous type. He knew Henry. He knew there was nothing between you two. So why was he suddenly acting like this?

Maybe he was just exhausted. After all, he’d driven almost four hours straight after a long business trip.

Still, something about that call left you uneasy.

As soon as you stepped back inside, you grabbed your things and announced, “Jungkook’s at my place. He’s looking for me.”

Your friends exchanged glances, and their curiosity arose.

Mina gently grabbed your wrist, stopping you mid-motion. “Then let him wait. I thought he was out of town for business?”

“He went home right after,” you replied.

Henry took a slow sip of his beer before butting in. “That still doesn’t explain why you’re running off.”

Chloe narrowed her eyes. “Did you two fight?”

You shook your head a little too quickly. “I just really need to go.”

Mina arched a brow, arms crossed. “So, you’re just leaving? Again? You did the same thing last time when you said you were coming over, but surprise, Jungkook had plans, and we never saw you.” 

You flinched at her words because, well… she wasn’t wrong. You had bailed on them before, not intentionally, but it still happened.

“I know, and I apologized,” you said, voice softer now.

Mina scoffed. “Right, and now you’re ditching us again?” 

You hesitated. A part of you wanted to stay, but what was the point if your mind was already elsewhere? Jungkook was at your place, waiting. And the way he sounded earlier… something felt off. You wouldn’t be able to enjoy yourself knowing that.

“I’m sorry. I swear I’ll make it up to you,” you said, rushing to press a quick kiss on their cheeks before grabbing your things.

Henry even offered to drive you home, but you shut that down immediately. No way in hell were you making things worse.

You tried calling Jungkook and then texting, but he didn’t answer. Not even once.

Did he stay? Did he leave? Was he sleeping or ignoring you on purpose?

You had no idea. All you knew was that you needed to get home. Fast.

The moment you step inside your apartment, you don’t need any grand gestures to tell you Jungkook is here. His shoes are neatly tucked in the corner and his coat draped over the couch’s hand rest.

You opened the lights, scanning the room, but you already know where he is. Your bedroom door is closed, and something in the air tells you he’s behind it.

For a moment, you hesitate. Then, without overthinking, you twist the doorknob and step inside.

There he is.

Stretched out on your bed, sound asleep. The bed that fits you just right somehow looks too small with him in it, his presence making the room feel both full and impossibly small. A soft glow from your bedside lamp casts delicate shadows across his face, highlighting his perfect features.

You step closer and notice he’s already changed into the clothes he keeps here, a reminder of how often your space has become his, too. Whenever you choose to stay here, he chooses to stay with you.

You can feel the shift in the air before he even stirs. After watching him sleep for a few quiet moments, he moves, his eyes fluttering open and landing on you almost instantly.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" you ask softly.

He sits up slowly, rubbing the sleep from his eyes before shaking his head. "You’re back? I thought you were staying out longer." His voice is low and laced with sleep, but as he stands to press a gentle kiss to your forehead, you search his expression for any lingering annoyance. He seems calm now, so maybe whatever tension was there before has faded.

"You wanted me to come home, right?" You meet his gaze, trying to read him.

"Yeah, but if you really wanted to stay out, you didn’t have to leave early," he replies easily.

"But you wanted me home," you counter, brows slightly furrowed.

"I did. But I didn’t force you, did I? I told you I’d rest, and I did." His tone is matter-of-fact, like the answer is obvious.

"Then why did you sound so irritated? You didn’t force me, sure, but you acted like you were pissed." You pull back, doing your best to keep your voice steady.

"I'm not irritated. I'm just worried that you were out late and I wasn’t around. That’s it."

And now, his tone says otherwise.

You just stare at him, at the way his frustration lingers in the air, thick and heavy. The whole situation is fucked, and you don’t even know how to respond.

You want to be mad, but you can’t figure out if you even have a reason to be. You want to walk out, slam the door behind you, let him deal with whatever this is on his own. But you don’t move.

You just stand there. Watching. Waiting.

After a moment, he lets out a breath, his shoulders easing. When he meets your eyes again, the tension between you starts to fade.

Without another word, he steps forward, closing the space between you. His arms wrap around you from behind, pulling you in as his warmth.

His lips find your neck, brushing against it before pressing soft kisses along your skin, his grip tightens around you.

"Look, I’m sorry, Y/N," he murmurs against your skin. "I’m just tired. And when I got home, all I wanted was to see you, but you weren’t here."

Another kiss. Then another. 

That night was filled with quiet embraces and soft kisses. You let him hold you until sleep takes over, as if the tension from earlier had never existed.

A lingering thought sits at the back of your mind, something unspoken, but you push it aside, choosing to sleep it away.

By the next day, everything falls back into place. No more arguments, no tension, just the usual life of being with him in his space. You had worried that the disagreement might leave a crack, but just like you, he let it go.

You find yourself falling for him even more. Not just for the way he listens, but for how he truly understands you. For the way he always makes sure you're okay, making life with him feel effortless.

Days turn into weeks, weeks into months, and with every passing moment, your love for him only deepens. It still feels surreal, to have someone like Jungkook; a man who loves you in all the right ways. A man so close to perfect, you struggle to find a single flaw. It sounds almost too good to be true, yet here you are, living it.

But perfection is an illusion. No one is truly flawless. Sometimes, love makes you see only what you want to see, painting over imperfections with rose-colored strokes. Maybe it’s because you love him so much that you’ve convinced yourself he’s perfect. Maybe, without realizing it, you’ve chosen not to notice the flaws.

You take a deep breath, eyes lingering on Chloe’s Instagram story. A picture of her, Mina, and Henry on the hiking trip you had all planned together. A trip you were supposed to be on. It had been set in since last year, but in the end, you stayed behind. Because Jungkook didn’t want you to go.

As much as you hate to admit it, it frustrates you. He had brushed it off as concern, calling it too dangerous, even though the trail was a well-known tourist spot with guides and safety measures in place. You hadn’t even asked for his permission, just informed him of your plans, but he shut it down anyway. And that sucked.

But you didn’t push. The moment you sensed his growing irritation, you backed off, not wanting to turn it into something bigger.

“It’s okay, love. We’ll plan a hiking trip together. I just don’t want you going without me, I’d go insane worrying about you,” Is the only thing he says before he showers you with kisses.

To be fair, he did follow through. A week after your friends went, he took you on your own hiking trip, just the two of you. It wasn’t the same trail, but the effort was there, and you genuinely appreciated it. Still, no matter how much you tried to shake it, a part of you couldn’t ignore the longing in your chest, the part that wished you had gone with them.

It was a Tuesday afternoon in the thick of summer when your phone buzzed with a call from your father. He was asking you to come home for his birthday dinner. Of course, you hadn’t forgotten his special day, but the invitation itself was unexpected.

Your dad never really made a big deal out of his birthday. It was usually just him, your mom, and sometimes the kids—your sister's son and daughter. Sure, you’d been home to celebrate milestone birthdays like his 50th and 55th, but now he was only turning 57, and you were curious why he suddenly wanted you home for dinner.

The train ride would take two hours, but that wasn’t the issue. It was the thought of telling Jungkook. You hadn’t introduced him to your family yet, despite dating for a whole year. You wanted to, of course, but this was not the right time now that Jungkook was out of the country for business.

You really wanted to visit your dad for his birthday, but you weren’t sure if Jungkook would let you. 

Yeah, it sounds kind of messed up, but he’s been getting stricter about where you go, especially if it’s somewhere he’s not with you. They might suggest, "Why not just invite him?" But, of course, he’s out of the country right now, so that’s not even an option.

You thought about not telling him at all, but you knew you’d feel guilty. And if you were being honest, he’d find out eventually, somehow. He always did.

So, you decided to bite the bullet and just let him know you were heading home to celebrate with your dad. You sent a quick message, figuring it was easier than calling, especially since he was probably busy. Plus, you honestly didn’t want to deal with his reaction over the phone.

But, of course, he called you right after the message was sent.

“Yes, Kook?” You answered, nervously biting your nails.

“You said you’re going home for your dad’s birthday?” He asked, his voice laced with uncertainty as you tried to figure out his mood.

“Yeah, he called me out of nowhere for dinner tonight.” You replied, absentmindedly playing with your lips, hoping the casual tone would ease the tension.

“How are you getting there? I’ll be home tomorrow evening.”

“It’s fine. Just a train ride, nothing to worry about.”

You wanted to reassure him in a single breath; that you’d be fine, that it was safe, and if it got late, you could always stay overnight. But for some reason, the words wouldn’t come.

“Can’t you just go over the weekend? We could go together. You have work tomorrow anyway.” His voice held that familiar, persuasive tone, trying to talk you out of it.

“Today’s his birthday, and he asked me to be there.”

You wished you had more energy to push back, to explain how important it was to you, but honestly, if he didn’t want you to go, then whatever.

“Okay.”

His response caught you off guard, almost so much that you didn’t hear it at first.

“What?”

“You can go. It’s your dad’s birthday. I just want you to take care of yourself on the ride, okay?”

You paused, not quite believing what you were hearing. No argument? No complaints? You almost wondered if he was playing some mind game, letting you go without any resistance.

“Love, it’s your father. Of course, I’ll let you go. Sure, I’m worried about your safety, but I don’t want you to miss his birthday.”

You felt a mix of relief and confusion. So, you excitedly planned the trip, knowing you’d make it home to see your dad. You even considered staying over if it got too late, just to catch the first train back in the morning.

It had been years since you last saw your parents, the last visit being when they came to the city for a doctor’s appointment and to check up on you, of course.

Before heading home, you stopped by a few shops to pick out gifts—not just for your dad, but for the whole family. A little something for your mom, your sister, and of course, the biggest gifts went to your niece and nephew. You missed them, and choosing things that reminded you of them felt like a small way to show it.

The train ride was uneventful, quieter than usual, probably because it was just an ordinary weekday. As soon as you arrived, you were met with warm hugs and excited voices. You handed out the gifts—clothes, perfume, and a wristwatch for the adults, and toys for the little ones.

“I don’t even remember the last time I saw you!” your sister, Alice, said as you all gathered around the dining table.

You laughed, reaching for a serving of food. “I know. Last time I saw you, you weren’t this fit. Damn, what are you even taking?” you teased, watching her roll her eyes.

“Y/N, how have you been? How’s work?” your dad asked, cutting into his steak. Then, with a teasing smirk, he added, “I heard you’ve got a boyfriend now.”

Your mom chuckled, clearly amused.

“Work’s been good! Actually, I just got promoted and got a salary increase,” you said with a proud grin.

“Well, duh. That’s because your boyfriend is literally one of the major stakeholders,” Alice said, raising a knowing eyebrow while taking a bite of her food.

She wasn’t wrong. Even though she lived far away, you always kept in touch, and out of everyone, she was the one who knew the most about your relationship.

“Wow, he sounds like a big deal. Why didn’t you bring him?” your mom asked with a smile.

“He’s in France for a business trip,” you replied simply.

Half of the dinner conversation revolved around Jungkook. It felt good to talk about him, to say his name out loud in a space where you didn’t have to think too much about anything else. It reminded you why you loved him, why you chose to be with him. You usually only talked about him with Alice or Chloe. Mina and Henry, on the other hand, weren’t as eager to hear about him.

You knew why. They thought you had changed, that you’d become distant since you started dating Jungkook. And, well… they weren’t entirely wrong. You weren’t as available as you used to be. It wasn’t always because of Jungkook, but if you were being honest, a lot of the time, it was. Either you already had plans with him, or he just didn’t want you to go.

Sometimes, you wondered if that was normal. But every time the thought crossed your mind, you brushed it off before it could linger too long. Overthinking would only stress you out, and honestly, it was easier to just let it go.

As the evening passed, you felt completely at ease surrounded by your family. It had been so long since you’d had the chance to truly relax and catch up with everyone. Alice, living just a few blocks away, always stayed in the town with her husband while you ventured to the city. She had no need to move away, especially since her husband worked while she stayed home with the kids. You were happy for them, but you also missed these moments of simple, unhurried connection.

You were lounging on the couch when Alice walked in from the kitchen, holding her phone. She raised an eyebrow at you as she approached.

“Why aren’t you checking your phone? Jungkook called me, asking about you. He said you’ve been ignoring his calls.”

Oh shit.

Your stomach dropped. You’d completely forgotten about your phone. You scrambled off the couch, rushing to grab your bag from the dining room.

You pulled your phone out, and sure enough, Jungkook’s name flashed on the screen. Without wasting a second, you picked up the call.

“Love,” you said, your voice faltering just a little.

“Where the hell are you?” His voice was harsh, and instantly your heart started pounding.

You blinked, taken aback by his tone. “I’m at my parents’ house,” you said, trying to keep it calm.

“Then why the hell are you not answering your phone? I’ve been trying to reach you for hours! You didn’t even let me know if you made it there safely!” His words were sharp.

You winced at the force in his voice but tried to explain, “I’m sorry, I didn’t have time—”

“And what the fuck was that story you posted? You’re not at your parents’ house.” 

What the fuck?

Your stomach flipped. “What are you talking about? I’m with my parents. You even spoke to my sister, didn’t you?”

“I’m not stupid, Y/N. I know what you’re doing. God knows how you and she planned this to make me think you’re at your parents.”

The words hit you like a slap. Your breath caught in your throat.

Then it hit you. Your Instagram story. It was a story you reposted from Mina six hours ago, with Chloe and Henry. It was a photo from last week, but Mina had just posted it, and you thought it was cute enough to share.

“That was from last week, Jungkook,” you said, your voice ice-cold.

“Oh yeah? And how the hell are you gonna prove that? You’ve ignored me all night!” His voice had grown louder, angrier.

“Are you serious?! If I were doing something behind your back, I wouldn’t leave a damn trace!” you snapped, the frustration bubbling over.

“And when have I ever lied to you, huh?!” Your voice shook with anger. “Even when I know you won’t let me go, I still ask permission from you, like I’m some damn kid! I don’t have to do that, but I still do it because I love you!”

There was a pause, thick with tension, and you could hear his harsh breathing on the other end. After a beat, he spoke again, colder than before.

“Prove it. Prove it to me, Y/N.” He said, provoking you.

You could feel your chest tightening, the anger in you rising. “I’m not proving anything to you, Jeon,” you hissed, the words slipping from your mouth before you could stop them.

You hung up without saying anything else, your fingers shaking as you looked at the screen. Leaning against the wall, you took deep breaths, trying to calm yourself. You couldn’t believe what had just happened. The anger was there, but it was the growing unease that made your heart beat faster.

Before you can even process what just happened, your phone starts ringing again. His name flashes on the screen, but you don’t hesitate; you shut it off and shove it into your bag. 

Alice steps into the kitchen, her eyes scanning your face with concern. “What was that?” she asks, gently rubbing your back.

You straighten up, hands on your hips, exhaling as you stare at the ceiling. Before you can answer, Alice’s phone buzzes in her hand. She holds it up, showing you the screen. Your stomach twists at the familiar number. Unregistered, but you already know exactly who it is.

“Block him, Alice,” you say, your voice firm. Without hesitation, she does.

“What happened? We heard you arguing with him,” she asks, her voice low.

With your frustration, you pull out a chair at the dining table and sink into it, burying your face in your hands. You take a deep breath, trying to shake off the lingering anger. “The audacity to call me a liar,” you mutter.

You’ve always listened to him. Let him have a say in your decisions. Let him decide when and where you can go. Let him tell you what’s best. You’ve given him control over so much of your life, and yet he still finds a reason to doubt you.

How messed up is that?

He didn’t even stop to talk things through. Just jumped straight to accusations. No hesitation, no second-guessing; just straight-up assuming the worst.

And the worst part? It’s your dad’s birthday. Instead of enjoying the night with your family, you’re sitting here, fuming over an argument that never should’ve happened in the first place. Over words, you never thought he’d say.

But maybe… maybe this is your fault too.

If you had just let him know when you arrived. If you had updated him like he always asks. If you hadn’t reposted that stupid story from Mina; one that, to him, made it look like you weren’t where you said you’d be.

And the worst thing? He doesn’t even know you actually did see them that day. It was just a quick visit to Mina’s apartment, barely an hour. Not a big deal. Not something worth mentioning.

Still, even if you messed up, does that really justify him doubting you like this? Assuming the worst without even asking?

You know you’re not perfect, but you also know one thing for sure; you would never do what he’s accusing you of. Not in a million years.

You decided to spend the night at your parents’ house. Even Alice stayed, not wanting to leave you alone with your thoughts. Going back to your place, where silence would only make things worse, wasn’t an option. At least here, you had distractions; family, conversation, anything to keep your mind from spiraling.

Before everything with Jungkook happened, you had planned to catch the earliest trip home so you could make it to work. But after that argument, there was no way. The idea of facing a normal day felt impossible. You sent in a sick leave request instead.

Alice slid a glass of beer toward you, watching as you picked it up. “Are you living with him now?” she asked, her tone casual but laced with curiosity.

You rolled your eyes before taking a sip. “I told you not to bring him up.”

“I’m just asking. You always say you barely sleep at your own place.”

She had a point. And she had also convinced you to drink with her, claiming it’d help lighten your mood. You weren’t exactly feeling up for it, but she was persistent, and since you weren’t going to work tomorrow, so you figured, why not?

“I stay at his place a lot, but I still go home whenever I want.”

Alice snorted. “That’s literally just living together, but with extra steps.”

“It’s not if I still have my own apartment.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night.” She smirked, then grabbed her phone, scrolling for a song. As music filled the space, she glanced at you again. “You know, from what you’ve told me, he seems nice. But still… be careful. No matter how long you’ve been with someone, you never really know them.”

She wasn’t wrong.

It had only been two years since you reconnected with Jungkook. It felt like a long time, but was it enough to really know who he was?

Now that you thought about it, there was a lot you didn’t know.

His job? You knew he dealt with big companies, something about stakeholders, but the details were always vague.

His family? He never talked about them.

His past? Barely mentioned.

Even something as big as whether he planned to stay here or go back to Korea, he never really said. And you never pushed, assuming he’d tell you when he was ready.

But still… you couldn’t help but wonder.

You woke up with a headache; not from drinking too much, just from barely sleeping. You had tossed and turned all night, your thoughts refusing to let you rest. And now, after barely two hours of sleep, you were already awake.

Staying in bed was tempting, but lying there only meant giving your mind more time to replay last night’s argument. So, with a deep sigh, you forced yourself up and headed downstairs for breakfast.

Before you even reached the dining hall, you heard voices—loud, cheerful conversation. Strange. It wasn’t just your family. Maybe some neighbors had stopped by, or a distant relative had come for your dad’s birthday.

But no.

Because sitting at the dining table, grinning like he belonged there, was Jungkook.

Your mom’s face lit up when she saw you. “Y/N, you’re finally awake! Look who’s here!” She gestured for you to sit, her excitement completely unbothered by the fact that you had a massive argument with him just hours ago.

Jungkook met your gaze with a warm smile as if nothing had happened.

“He came early this morning to pick you up for work,” your mom continued. “But Alice told him you were taking the day off.”

Your dad chuckled, clapping Jungkook on the back. “Straight from France, Y/N! We thought you were just making excuses not to bring him over, but here he is!”

Jungkook only laughed at that, completely at ease.

You, on the other hand, said nothing. You were still irritated, but you couldn’t deny the shock of seeing him here. He told you he wouldn’t be back until tonight, yet here he was, casually having breakfast with your family like it was the most natural thing in the world.

And they liked him. A lot.

The conversation kept flowing, and from the way everyone talked to him, it was clear they’d already warmed up to him. This wasn’t exactly how you imagined introducing him to your family, but at least you skipped the awkward “Hey, Mom and Dad, this is my boyfriend” speech.

Alice shot you a knowing smirk. “Alright, we’ll get going and let you two talk,” she said, winking as she stood up.

You shot her a glare, but she only grinned.

They excused themselves, leaving just you and Jungkook in the dining hall.

He sat across from you, a cup of coffee in front of him, while you quietly ate your breakfast, letting him stare. You weren’t in the mood to break the silence first.

“You turned off your phone.” His voice was steady, but there was something behind it. Something tight.

You lifted your head slightly, meeting his gaze. “Obviously.”

“You had me worried.” His expression turned serious, waiting for you to respond. But you didn’t. You let the silence stretch between you, taking another bite of your bread.

Jungkook sighed. “Look, Y/N. I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t mean to lash out at you last night. I just... I panicked when you didn’t answer my calls or messages. And then I saw your Instagram story with your friends, and I—”

He reached for your hand resting on the table, his fingers wrapping around yours. His eyes softened, pleading.

Damn it.

He lifted your hand to his lips, pressing slow kisses against your palm, his fingers playing with yours. You stayed quiet, watching him, feeling the warmth of his lips against your skin.

“I know I messed up,” he murmured between kisses. “That’s why I’m here, love. I’m really sorry.”

And just like that, your irritation wavered.

The frustration, the anger, the late-night overthinking. It all started slipping away.

With just a kiss on your palm, your resolve crumbled.

With just the fact that he flew back early to fix things, all the things that had you upset suddenly didn’t feel that heavy anymore.

He slowly let go of your hand, reaching for something beside him. Your breath hitched the moment you saw it, a bouquet of pink carnations, wrapped in soft lime green and peach paper.

Jungkook stood up, moving to sit beside you, placing the bouquet in your hands. You blinked, caught off guard, struggling to find the right words.

“I was supposed to leave later this afternoon,” he admitted, voice low, “but I couldn’t stand leaving things unresolved. And when I couldn’t reach you... I just couldn’t let it happen.”

Being loved by Jeon Jungkook feels damn good.

From the way he puts in effort to how he always finds ways to make you happy. From his care to his unwavering support, being in love with him feels easy; effortless. Of course, you won’t deny that his looks and wealth are nice perks, but those are just extras. What truly matters is how he loves you, how he makes you feel secure in his own way.

So, without hesitation, you let the issue slide.

You never really planned to stay mad at him for long. You just needed a little space, a moment to process everything. But that became impossible the second he flew across countries just to fix things with you. And if you were being honest, the argument happened because you ignored his calls and then reposted Mina’s story without thinking.

You ended up staying at your parents' house until after lunch. Not because you wanted to, but because your parents weren’t ready to let Jungkook go just yet. They really seemed to like him. The way he talked to them so comfortably, how they got his humor, how he charmed them effortlessly. They were practically keeping him hostage with their endless questions and stories.

Not that you based your love life on your parents’ approval, but it was nice to see them get along better than you expected. Jungkook wasn’t hard to like. Maybe back in high school, when he was more reserved, but now? Now, as a grown man with a business mindset, he knew how to win people over.

Well… except for your friends.

To be fair, they barely knew him. Most of their interactions were limited to the quick moments when he’d pick you up after you hung out with them.

Life with him has been good. No major arguments, no real problems. At least, not as long as you kept him updated on your whereabouts. He did the same for you, but you made it a point to let him know what was happening in your life, especially when he wasn’t around.

Because that’s all he really wanted.

For you to check in, to let him know you were okay. You understood that; it was how he made sure you were safe.

But there were moments when you wished he didn’t care so much.

Specifically, when you wanted to hang out with your friends.

That was the only real issue between you. His tendency to limit who you spent time with especially if they weren’t your high school friends.

And when you sensed that pushing too hard would only lead to an argument, you backed down. You let it go.

Because at the end of the day, you knew he just wanted to protect you.

At least, that’s what you kept telling yourself.

But sometimes, you couldn’t shake the feeling that it didn’t really make sense.

Hanging out with your friends has always been part of your routine, it’s your way to unwind, to reset. They lift you up in a way no one else can. Of course, Jungkook does too, but it’s different when you’re with them. There’s a freedom to it, a lightness that you don’t get anywhere else.

“Love, please? I can’t miss Chloe’s party. It’s her farewell before she leaves for America.”

You tried to reason with Jungkook, hoping he’d understand. Chloe was chasing her dream, heading off to model for luxury brands, and this was the last time you’d all be together before she left.

“I’m allowing you, but I have to fetch you by midnight. You already know I don’t like it when you sleep somewhere else without me.”

His voice was calm but firm as he drove, one hand resting casually on the wheel. He had just picked you up from work when you decided to bring it up. You figured telling him now would be better than waiting until later.

“Love, this is the last time we’ll all be together. Come on.”

You reached over, resting your hand on his lap as you pleaded softly.

He glanced down for half a second, then back at the road, his expression unreadable.

“I’ve said my conditions, Y/N.”

Final. No room for negotiation.

Frustration simmered inside you. No matter how much you tried to understand him, this part of him never made sense.

Why does he always do this? Why does he insist on controlling when and where you can be with your own friends? People who were in your life long before he was?

You told yourself, again and again, that he was just trying to protect you. But from what?

These were your childhood friends. You had never been in danger with them, not once.

But, like always, you didn’t push. You let him have his way, let him hold the reins like he always did.

The party was at a club, nothing crazy, and afterward, everyone was supposed to crash at a hotel Chloe had booked nearby. She wanted to savor the last moments with you all before she left.

But, as always, you were going to miss out.

“Bye, Y/N. I’ll see you at midnight. I love you.”

He pressed a kiss to your forehead before pulling away, walking back to his car, and driving off.

You were irritated, but you swallowed it down, not wanting to ruin the night. This was Chloe’s farewell party, the last time you’d all be together before she left and you weren’t about to let your frustration with Jungkook take over.

The party was packed. Chloe had invited everyone. Her high school circle friends, her college buddies, coworkers, even a few relatives. The energy was buzzing, the music loud, the drinks flowing. It was fun… or at least, it should’ve been. If only Jungkook hadn’t already soured your mood.

You did your best to act normal, plastering on smiles, laughing when expected, but Mina wasn’t buying it. She never did.

“You okay, Y/N?” she asked as you stepped outside with her while she had a smoke. You didn’t smoke, never had, but the fresh air seemed like a good idea.

“Yeah, of course!” you answered a little too enthusiastically.

Mina gave you a look before taking a slow drag of her cigarette.

“That’s the fakest answer I’ve ever heard from you,” she said flatly, exhaling a stream of smoke.

You forced out a laugh.

“Even your laugh sounds fake. Gosh, Y/N. Try harder.”

“Fuck you,” you shot back playfully, nudging her with your shoulder.

She smirked but didn’t drop it. “Seriously, what’s up? You haven’t looked okay since you got here. Did something happen?”

You hesitated. You never talked about your issues with Jungkook to your friends. Hell, you barely talked about him at all. It wasn’t just because they had… opinions about him. You just weren’t the type to discuss your relationship with others. When things got tough, you preferred to handle it on your own.

But tonight, you wanted to tell her. Just this once. Just so someone knew how you really felt.

But the words wouldn’t come.

“Just tired,” you said instead. “Had a lot of work to deal with before I left the office.”

Mina gave you a side-eye, clearly not convinced. “Mmm-hmm. That sucks,” she said, but her tone was laced with suspicion.

A beat passed before she asked, “By the way, how’s Jungkook? You never talk about him.”

That caught you off guard. Was she just curious, or did she sense something?

“He’s doing great. He drove me here. He’ll, uh… pick me up later too,” you say, trying to sound casual, trying to make it seem like no big deal.

But it was a big deal. And somehow, without meaning to, you’d just handed Mina the entire fucking truth without actually saying it.

Her brows shot up. “What the hell do you mean? You’re not coming with us after the party?”

You blink, caught completely off guard. You knew you’d have to break it to them eventually, but you hadn’t figured out how yet. And now, thanks to your own damn words, you were trapped.

“Didn’t we talk about this?” Mina pressed, her voice rising. “You said you were coming. Now you’re telling me Jungkook’s picking you up?”

“I—I mean, yeah, but—”

“He didn’t allow you, did he?”

“It’s not like that. I was supposed to come with you guys after the party, but I just… decided it’s not a good idea considering my state,” you say, blurting out whatever excuse comes to mind without even thinking.

Mina scoffs, raising a brow. “Oh, really? And you also decided it was a good idea not to tell us you’re ditching?”

“No! It’s not like—”

Before you can even finish, Henry walks in.

“Hey, what’s taking you two so long? Chloe’s looking for you. She wants to take a picture,” he says, approaching the both of you.

Neither you nor Mina say a word. But while Henry looks between you two in confusion, Mina keeps her gaze locked on you, practically daring you to explain.

“What’s going on?” Henry finally asks, his eyes flicking between the two of you.

“I don’t know. Why don’t you ask her?” Mina says flatly, tossing her cigarette to the ground and stomping it out.

You ignore the tension tightening around your chest. “Let’s go inside. Chloe’s waiting,” you mumble, turning to leave.

But before you can take five steps, Mina’s voice cuts through the air, laced with sarcasm.

“Make sure to tell her you’re ditching us  again after this, yeah?”

“What do you mean?” Henry asks, still completely clueless.

You glance back, trying to come up with something, anything to say, but your throat tightens. Instead of answering, you turn and walk away.

You swallow hard, holding your breath, forcing back the burn in your eyes. You try not to think. Not about Mina, not about the truth she’s circling, not about the weight pressing down on you.

Just breathe. Keep it together.

You’re almost at your seat when Chloe suddenly appears beside you, her bright smile and glassy eyes making it clear she’s a few drinks in.

“Babe! I was looking for you everywhere!” she exclaims, giggling. “Where’s Henry and Mina?”

“They’re outside,” you say quickly, forcing a smile. “They’ll be here in a sec.”

But even in her tipsy state, Chloe picks up on the shift in your energy. Her smile fades, replaced by a concerned frown.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” she asks softly.

The moment the words leave her lips, your eyes start to burn.

Shit.

“I’m okay, Chloe! I just need to go to the restroom for a second,” you rush out, spinning on your heels before she can press any further.

She calls after you, but you don’t stop. You weave through the crowd, head down, feet moving on autopilot. The second you reach the restroom, you lock the door behind you and let everything crash down at once.

It’s harder than you thought.

You want to tell them everything. God, you’re so fucking tired of pretending. But at the same time, you want to protect Jungkook. You know exactly how they’d see him if you told the truth. Maybe they already do. Maybe you’re the one who refuses to acknowledge it.

You press your hands against the sink, staring at yourself in the mirror. The music pounds outside. People are drinking, dancing, and celebrating. And yet, you’re here. Stuck.

You don’t recognize the girl staring back at you.

When did this happen?

How did you get here?

You thought you could handle it—handle the way Jungkook loves you. But now, standing here, wiping at the tears spilling down your cheeks, you realize something you’ve been pushing away for too long.

You’re suffocating.

The sudden knock at the door jolts you back to reality. Panic kicks in. You swipe at your tears, straighten your clothes, and force a deep breath.

“Just a second!” you call out, turning to the sink to splash cold water on your face. The knocking doesn’t stop. It gets louder, harder—urgent. But whoever’s on the other side isn’t saying a word.

Your hands shake as you dry your face. You pull yourself together as best as you can before unlocking the door, bracing yourself.

The second it swings open, you freeze.

Chloe, Mina, and Henry stand there, staring at you.

Chloe steps forward first, her drunken haze from earlier completely gone. “Y/N, what happened?” she asks, concern heavy in her voice.

You open your mouth to answer, but before you can get a word out, Mina moves in. Without warning, she grabs your wrist and pulls you out of the bathroom.

“Hey! Mina, careful!” Henry hisses, but she doesn’t let go.

Her grip is tight, but that’s not what stuns you, it’s the fire in her eyes.

The second you’re outside, away from the pounding music and the haze of the bar, she finally releases you. Then she turns, glaring at you with full force.

“No time for bullshit. Tell us what the fuck is going on,” she demands, arms crossed.

“The fuck, Mina? Can you chill?” Henry groans, rubbing his temples.

Mina whips around to face him. “How the fuck am I supposed to chill when she’s doing this again?! We’ve talked about this before, Henry and it’s so fucking obvious she’s doing it on purpose! For what? Her asshole boyfriend?”

“Mina!” Chloe snaps, but Mina doesn’t back down.

“What? Are you really going to sit here and act like this is okay? This is the last night we have together before you  leave, Chloe, and she’s pulling this shit again!” Her voice rises in frustration.

You barely register the words. Your chest is tight. Your throat feels like it’s closing up. You don’t even realize the tears are falling until you taste salt on your lips.

“Tell me, Y/N. Are you really sick, or is that just another excuse so you don’t have to come with us? Because you’re so obsessed with your boyfriend that you can’t even spare a single fucking night for your best friend?”

It’s too much.

“I wanted to come, okay?!” The words burst out of you. “I almost begged him to let me stay for just one fucking night, but he wouldn’t let me!”

Your voice cracks, and the tears come faster. You can’t stop them. You don’t even try.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry that I let this happen! It’s all my fucking fault because I didn’t want to fight with him! I didn’t want him to be disappointed! I didn’t want to make it an issue!”

As the words spill out, the truth crashes into you like a truck. How fucking pathetic. How small you’ve made yourself for him.

Chloe speaks up, her voice soft but steady. “Why would he be disappointed?”

“I don’t know!” you cry out, frustration pouring out of you. “Because he doesn’t want me to, and if I do, it’s a fucking problem! And I just—” Your voice breaks again. You drag your hands through your hair, gripping it hard like you’re trying to hold yourself together.

“I don’t fucking want that, okay? I know you all think I’m stupid as hell right now, but that’s the fucking truth! Call me obsessed, call me whatever the fuck you want, because it’s true!”

Your heart is racing. Your breath is coming in short, sharp gasps.

“I’m so fucking stupid, but I chose this. And I wanted to apologize for ruining this night, for making this about me when it was supposed to be for Chloe.”

Your back hits the cold wall behind you, and you close your eyes, gripping your hair, willing yourself to disappear.

Silence.

No one says a word.

You don’t have to look up to know they’re all staring at you.

Your head is pounding, your heart’s racing, and regret hits you like a brick wall. You didn’t mean to let it all spill out like that, but fuck, you just couldn’t hold it in anymore.

Goddamn it.

Your eyes flick down to your wrist. It’s ten minutes to eleven. You don’t have your phone, but you already know what’s waiting for you: missed calls, unread messages, or worse… he’s already here, looking for you.

“I should go. Jungkook’s probably—” your voice is tired, drained.

“You’re not going anywhere.”

You blink, caught off guard. “What?”

“I’m not letting you walk away again. And I’m sure as hell not letting that asshole control your fucking life.” Mina’s voice is sharp, unwavering.

“No. I’ll figure this out, okay? I'll talk to you—”

“Are you seriously letting him take over your whole fucking life?” She looks at you like she doesn’t even recognize you anymore. “What the hell happened to you?”

“Mina, chill.” Henry grips her arm, but his eyes soften when they land on you. “Y/N, listen. We’ll figure this out. We’ll help you.”

“What are you talking about? I can handle this—”

Chloe pulls you in, arms locking around you in a trembling, desperate hug. She holds on like she’s afraid you’ll slip away if she lets go.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” her voice cracks, and your chest tightens. “I’m sorry this is happening to you, and we didn’t even notice.”

The words cut deep, deeper than you expect. And before you can stop them, the tears come rushing back, spilling over like a dam finally breaking.

“We didn’t know… I’m sorry.”

With just one hug, the weight you’ve been carrying shifts. Crushing, yet somehow lighter at the same time.

With just one hug, the exhaustion seeps into your bones, making you realize how much you’ve been running on empty.

With just one hug, it finally sinks in. This isn’t just overwhelming. It’s unbearable.

“We were supposed to be there for you,” Chloe whispers through her own tears. “But where were we?”

And that’s when it hits you. You’re not alone. You don’t have to be. For the first time in a long time, you feel like you can breathe.

But then, regret creeps in.

“What exactly happened?” Henry asks.

You step back from Chloe, swallowing hard. “Nothing really happened.”

“Y/N, please,” Mina sighs, voice weary. “Just stop defending him for once.”

And then, you see him.

A familiar figure standing in the distance, phone in hand, scanning the crowd with a panicked expression.

Jungkook.

The second his eyes land on you, he moves. Fast. Almost running.

Part 1 of 2 It's been a year since I last wrote, and I thought I wouldn’t come back and would just be a casual reader. But here I am, writing again anyway, lmao.

[chrollohearttags]

nobody knows • portgas d. ace

another drabble for sneaky link/ex boyfriend ace bc I have one functioning brain cell and all of it is focused on him atm teehee 🤭

wc: 1.8K

more infidelity (y’all both still AIN’T SHIT 😭 reader got that dog in her I’m sorry), straight porn, modern au, black fem reader, phone sex/sexting, squirting, oral sex, calls reader bitch, a eating + anal, recording, backshots, rough sex, heavy breeding, idk what else will come out

he’s so ooc in this and I don’t give a fuck (I’m ovulating and stressed w life + therapy is too expensive)

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nobody knows why you and ex-boyfriend!ace broke up in the first place. Honestly, it seemed like such a waste…three long years down the drain with nothing to show for it but the two of you left in shambles. Friends and family consoling you both as you learned to navigate life without one another. (Y/N), moving on fairly quickly with the son of one of your dad’s friends..a byproduct of military nepotism and the very antithesis to what Ace was. A stiff working a cushy desk job and reaping the benefits..pushing papers and always playing it safe. He was very kind, sweet and damn near ideal in every sense of the word. Not too much of a drinker, a partygoer or anything of the sort but he always took you on dates. All of your girlfriends liked him well enough, thinking that he more matched your speed than the thrill seeking, goofy, chaotic daredevil that was ex-boyfriend!ace. Who rode motorcycles and climbed mountains in his spare time, when he wasn’t holding life by the tips of his fingers as an EMT. Covered in tattoos, he looked like such a quintessential, stereotypical ‘bad boy’… “God, (y/n). I don’t know what you ever saw in that guy. He’s a loser, through and through.”

However, what nobody knows..is that you never truly left him alone! He was your ideal match and you couldn’t shake it. You could actually laugh, joke and make mistakes with him. There was no need for faux perfection and lies. You saw each other for who you really were.

Nobody knows that while you’re at work, he’s constantly sending you filthy messages to get you aroused and worked up. Making you chew your lip and the tip of your pen as you twirl in your chair..reading how he’s going to make sure you feel it in your stomach the next time you two link. Nobody knows he shamelessly sends you nut videos, uttering your name with the sexiest moans. Nobody knows that when you tell your assistant that the hour where you refuse any meetings is designated for you to choke on ex-boyfriend!ace’s cock in your cute little business attire..loving the way those glasses hang off the tip of your nose as he pushes your forehead to his pelvis.

“Goddamn, babe..I knew I couldn’t quit you..you’re eating my dick up so good.”

“It’d taste even better if you let me come on it first.”

loving that you were willing to abandon all of your morals for him so easily. Nobody knows about the second phone you keep stashed away in your glovebox just to call him late at night when your new man is sleeping or working overnight and you want some company..

“Can you please come over? I miss you..he won’t be back tonight. I promise.”

“Of course, baby. Anything for you..I’ll always come running when you tell me.”

or in need of a good orgasm because that dummy couldn’t give you one if you handed him a roadmap to the clit! With ex-boyfriend!ace on the other line talking you through it with that deep voice and lewd commands.

“Oh my gosh, pretty girl. Did you call me just so you could touch yourself to the sound of my voice? You’re so cute..” making you FaceTime him because he wants to see the mess he helped create.

nobody knows that whilst you're out at dinner with your new man, alongside loved ones as he boasts about how he knows you’re the one and how you guys make such a lovely couple, (y/n) is daydreaming about ex-boyfriend!ace riding you on the back of his Suzuki through the city, knowing the rush gets you turned on. That rather than dealing with an insecure little boy who felt intimidated by your looks and success, ex-boyfriend!ace would go drinking and partying with you, loving when you showed off your body because he wasn't worried about another man taking what was his. Nobody knows that you have a small tattoo of ex-boyfriend!ace’s name right above your private area. Hell, it's not as if your new man touched you enough to notice and when he did, the lights remained off.

When your girlfriends are divulging the dirt about their relationships and how envious they are of you. Claiming that you hit the jackpot with such a structured, well mannered guy who works a high paying job and always comes home to you. But what nobody knows…is that he could never replace the man you truly love. So much so, when you kiss him on the cheek that Friday evening before heading to the ‘airport’ for another business trip..you’re secretly meeting ex-boyfriend!ace in the top floor suite at a luxury hotel hours away from home where you two go every month to fuck each other's brains out for three days straight. Akin to addicts who can’t be satisfied, you rabidly devour one another until your bodies quit.

“I’ve waited all week for this…I’m so not sorry for how I’m about to fuck you.” ”I wouldn’t expect anything less.” Wrapping his hands around your throat, shoving his tongue into your mouth as he corners you against a wall. Nobody knows that ex!boyfriend!ace has you face down on a mattress with your ass up in the air as his tongue explores both of your entrances. Practically seating you on his face to suction around that clit, flicking his tongue in and out of your tight cunt before prodding your asshole, leaving a sloppy trail of saliva on each of them. Because you wore that adorable little heart shaped plug to help prep you for the weekend.

“You taste so fucking good…especially when I know you’ll let me have it anytime I want.”

nobody knows that you’re somewhere gripping the sheets for dear life as ex-boyfriend!ace delivers the most insane backshots you’ve ever felt. Those perfectly round, thick cheeks ricocheting off of his lower half..the contrast in your skin and that pearlescent scream surrounding his shaft making the sight even better…ripping orgasms from your body with no shame because he deserves it. After all, you belong to him.

“That’s right..come on this dick, bitch. Give me what I want..” he still loves and respects you all the same. But ace knows you prefer rough, degrading sex far more than the mundane and vanilla. Especially when it was in short supply with your current situation. Even going as far as to place a foot on your head, tugging your arms behind your back so that he can really bury his cock inside of you.

“Yes! Keep fucking meeee, just like that, daddy. ‘S so good!”

“You love when I dig you out like this, treating you like a little slut..’swear this pussy’s going to get me in some serious trouble one day. But I don’t care, I love you.”

rambling on as he feels you twitching around him for the third time, leaving splatters of warm juices each time; squirting immensely from the constant stimulation to your spot.

“Damn, you’re coming so hard, pretty girl. Is he not fucking you right?” Laughing before he could even get the very rhetorical question from his mouth. Leaning down to place a trail of pecks and licks on your spine to console you before placing you into a prone position. ”Of course not..nobody knows this body better than me. Isn’t that right, gorgeous?” All but confirmed by the way you’re tightening around him..he can’t help but to grip your throat and steal sloppy kisses from you whilst he drills you into the mattress. “Nooo, babyyy. You’re the only one who can fuck me this good..oh my Goddd—“ placing his camera in your face so that he could have it for safekeeping..(and in case he gets wind of your man running his mouth about him again!) Making you call his name and scream it to the heavens. “Aceeee, fuck meeee..”

Nobody knows that you’ve been fucking for damn near an hour while your phone buzzes with missed calls and texts from your boyfriend and whatever little girl he’s deciding to entertain for the moment. As heinous as it was, you were just filling the void and you’d always find your way back to each other. Perhaps it was the thrill of sneaking around that kept this charade going. Either way, you weren’t giving each other for a long time and it’s so obvious why..no one else will do the freaky shit that you both crave so much.

“Oh my gosh, I can’t believe you’re letting me fuck your ass again..feels amazing.” glaring up at him with the most adoring gaze in your eyes and smile on your face as you proudly hold a vibrator to your clit..allowing him to stretch that opposite opening. Practically coming on spot when you began to show your gratitude for this pleasure…

“Thank you, daddy..using all my holes like this. I love it so much.” That much apparent by the tears pouring down your face alongside that toothy grin. Only he could give it to you so good, you begin to cry!

“Oh shit..of course, gorgeous girl. I’d do anything for you..anything to see my baby smile.” Including pinning you down by your throat and letting trails of saliva drip into your mouth. Even feeding you a couple slaps when you all but pleaded with him to treat you like an object.

nobody knows that on the sparse occasions when you have sex with your current man, he’s forced to wear a condom because you’ve discussed several times that you don’t want children and you’re not taking any risks. But ex-boyfriend!ace gets the privilege of feeling that hard cock sliding in and out of you raw..and to breed you as many times as he can muster! Letting load after load spill into your aching womb. Filling every hole with that dripping seed.

“You look so pretty stuffed with my cum, sweetheart. Just how I like it.”

nobody knows why you left ex-boyfriend!ace in the first place but you knew why you’d always come running back!

@violetxxvenom @shamelesshoefairy @lwop-kpop

[windixie]

feels like apple cider | frat boy! gojo x reader

🎞️ pairing . academic rivals college au. frat boy! gojo x reader

ch . 1/ 🌱

summary . ever since you could remember, gojo was always significantly better than you in anything and everything. given that you have gone throughout grade school to high school, and to eventually college with him. competing through test scores and letter grades, you find yourself hating the white haired man even more. after your friend convinces you to let loose for once and enjoy a frat party, you wind up in the bed of none other than gojo. the bigger problem? you can't remember anything before that but he does. and he's not letting you go anytime soon.

warnings ⓘ 18+, fem! reader, enemies to lovers, academic rivals, smut, fluff, angst, gojo is really mean, sort of slow burn?

taglist . @aldebrana @hyori2 @hanakotateyama

masterlist . link

playlist .

wc : 1.3 k

authors note ! welcome all to the premiere of stuck by you (sby) i really hope you all enjoy this story as much as i will enjoy creating it. have fun reading .

if anyone were to ask you, ‘what is your favorite season ?’ you’d be quick to respond with ‘fall’. you loved everything about it. the pretty vibrant colors the leaves would turn into as the temperature changed , rewatching your favorite shows especially gilmore girls which helped you romanticize school life and get you into that rory gilmore mindset. but most importantly , you adored having apple cider. it’s around this time where the town center in your small and cozy hometown would host its annual fair. there would always be this sweet family that would have their stand next to the other food vendors, selling the best apple cider you could ever have.

that’s what you were looking forward for today. the apple cider that just made your mouth water. only thing holding you back was your human geography class. it seemed as if the universe was just testing your patience, with time moving unbelievably slow.

“you’re in deep thought, baby” you heard a familiar voice behind you. although, you wish it weren’t that familiar. you turned to look up at him — satoru gojo. the tall and muscular man grinned taking his glasses off and placing them on the table before sitting down next to you.

you grimaced at the endearment similarly to when apple cider goes bad making it more sour, like vinegar. “thought i told you not to call me that” satoru chuckled at the way your nose scrunched up. “right. anyways, you prepared for tomorrow? heard the test was thirty questions. not a lot but that means it’s going to be difficult. im sure I won’t have any problems with it” he said, his usual cocky demeanor in full swing.

“wow im sure.” you said, barely able to keep yourself from rolling your eyes at the boy. you looked back down at your study guide highlighting key points to put in your cheat sheet that was allowed by your professor. an 8 x 11 sheet of paper, limited to one side, and handwritten as always. satoru didn’t need one. he never did. he was so full of himself that he was certain that he’d pass any test without the assistance of a cheat sheet.

satoru was always a popular man. effortlessly stealing anyone’s attention with just his looks. you can’t deny that he is attractive, but you would never admit it. not to mention his unshakable personality that makes everyone around him want to be his friend, be him, or be with him. so you weren’t surprised at the quiet whispers. you glanced over taking notice of the group of girls ogling at the boy sitting next to you staring at you in jealousy and judgement that you were the one to sit next to him. satoru noticed as well giving them a smile that made them immediately fangirl.

but as satoru turned to look at you once more, you were already packing your things. ready to head out to the town center to get ahold of the, oh so delicious, apple cider. you were honestly an addict. you even dreamt about it once, tasting the most precious thing to you in the world just to get awoken by your friend who so happened to also be your roommate loudly moaning after bringing in a new boy from whatever party she had just come back from. you cried that night.

“you going somewhere?” satoru asked not looking at you but at the tits of one of the girls that had just walked by. he’d definitely hit that tonight at his party.

“town center” you replied in that sweet voice you had. oh wait no. no sorry not with satoru. you replied with a dull voice as you zipped up your messenger bag and slung it across your body. “alright, I’ll see you at the party tonight? oh that’s right.. you never come out of that cave hm? sorry I forgot !” he teased as you left the classroom.

the fresh breeze of air welcomed you as you stepped outside. the fair wasn’t far from your college. it was actually very close just a ten minute walk that you were taking right now. maybe after grabbing your apple cider, you could head to your dorm and finish season three of gilmore girls as well. you were excited at the thought that you couldn’t help but smile.

you made it safely to the town center watching as people enjoy the rides and spent time with loved ones. your beloved stand wasn’t put up yet so you decided to pass the time by browsing the shops. your eyes scanned around the clothing displayed on the window and they eventually landed onto a mini skirt. the pretty piano design on it immediately caught your eye. you needed that.

you walked in, greeted by a worker before making your way deeper into the store in search of that skirt. as you were searching, your eyes caught a certain brunette . “mari” you called out. the figure turned around to reveal your friend — and your horny roommate. “hey girl! not a surprise to see you here.. let me guess. apple cider?” you chuckled still looking around for that damn skirt. “obviously, you know how much I’ve been craving it? human geography is the lamest class it made so hungry” you whined receiving a giggle from mari.

there it was. the last piano skirt and it was in your size. thank god. you knew the universe couldn’t hate you that much. “ooh that’s cute, you gonna wear it to the party later?” she asked you as she also searched through the racks. you scoffed. “as if I’d ever step foot in one of gojo’s parties.” there was no way through heaven and earth, that you would willingly ever walk into a sweaty fraternity party where people were making out in the couch, pool, or in the rooms. big ew.

“cmon haven’t you known satoru since you were kids?” she asked tilting her head. “doesn’t mean I like him.” you mumbled making your way to the check out. “y/n seriously, you gotta go out more. this is a great opportunity. look ill even promise you that I’ll stick with you the whole time we’re there” you? go to satoru gojo’s party? the same boy you’ve been competing since diapers over toys, clothes, grades, relationships — which you lost because to this day you’ve never had a boyfriend — grades, friendships, and did I mention grades?

you thanked the lady as she handed your skirt in a bag after placing the receipt in there as well. “I dunno mari..” you said which only received a sigh from her. “just go this once. if you don’t like it, you won’t have to come again, promise” you thought about it. you were a sophomore in college and you haven’t been to a party till now, might as well enjoy your time here. but gilmore girls…

“fine. I’ll go.” you gave in. “yes ! okay this is so exciting. im gonna go now to start getting ready, you should to” she squealed as she held onto your arm. “i will, after getting my apple cider” you reminded her . “okay okay hurry ! ill see you back at the dorms !”

you watched her walk away before looking down at your watch. 6:30. shit wait what time does the stand get put up? you rushed to where the food was glancing up at the posters before you saw the familiar apple sign. you made your way over before getting your heart absolutely broken. there was none left.

the lady that was in charge took notice of you. “oh sweetheart you’re late, I just sold my last one.” seriously? you’ve been looking forward to this all day ! you can’t blame the woman though, she’s just doing her job. as you let out a sigh you glanced to see him. satoru. with the same girl who gave you a dirty look earlier. apple ciders in both their hands.

gojo smirked seeing the wheels turn in your head. “sorry, looks like I got the last one” the universe really does hate you.

a/n : I hope you all enjoyed it ahh this is my first time writing such a long fic :,p I hope to be able to write ch 2 soon !

[bratbarzal]

A VALENTINES BLURB EVENT? You’re too kind.

what about “wow, you really don’t have anyone special in your life at the minute.” with ex!fwb Jack Hughes?

✩‧₊˚ bratbarzal's valentines event!˚₊‧✩

3. “wow, you really don’t have anyone special in your life at the minute.” the maggie cinematic universe really is expanding!!! a jack blurb!!! hey look at us!! who'd have guessed it?? not me!! it's a smidge angsty, because all the fluff was giving me a complex. it's not who I am. I can barely look in the mirror any more. also you said the word ex!!!!!!!! I have no choice but to create problems!!!!!! also again, changed the phrasing bc I was struggling with it exactly as is but the sentiment is there ♥️

*mentions of vomiting

Jack knew to keep a close eye on you the second that he saw you down that first drink - plastering yourself to the other side of the room, avoiding him like the plague, as you so often do these days, but somehow he can't look away.

He tries not to be too obvious about it, knows that you'd have a problem with him showing any signs of interest or concern anymore, but he knows how these nights go when you're like this. So he watches over the rim of his cup, spares fleeting glances in your general direction, and pretends he's looking at something else nearby to avoid detection.

But he gives up the act when you're too far gone - stumbling to the nearest bathroom with your hand clasped over your mouth after dancing around with the girls and getting a little lightheaded.

He can hear the retching from the other side of the door, thankful that it isn't locked when he twists the handle - closes it softly behind him and secures the two of you inside so no one else can see you in such a vulnerable state.

You groan, probably having seen him from the corner of your eye, and press your forehead to your forearm, the clamminess of your skin evident even from over where he's stood.

"Don't come any closer," you warn him, holding out your other hand in a stopping motion without even looking his way, "I feel sick enough without my senses being flooded with Creed."

He ignores the warning, a heavy sigh and hard roll of his eyes his only response as he rolls up his sleeves and makes his way over, making a move to hold back your hair before you're shoving at his thighs in defiance. "I'm trying to help you," he snaps, voice low as he fights your objections.

"Don't want your help," you snap back, "Want you to go get someone else."

“You really think I’d just leave you here?” He jiggles your touch from his thigh, despite the way he likes how your hand lingers lightly as another wave of nausea washes over you. "C'mon, straighten up a little."

You whine as he guides your body, his touch gentle as he manoeuvres you slowly to avoid making you sick again. "Jack," you groan, "Stop."

"'M'not gonna leave you," he huffs, avoiding the blind swat of your hand as you reach back again to push, swerving around the stretch of your arm and throwing himself onto the floor on the other side of the toilet. "You shouldn't be on your own, not like this."

"You had no problem leaving me before," you grumble, your face wincing as you try to breathe through queasiness, straightening up now that he isn't the one telling you to and sitting back on your heels.

"You really wanna do this with your head half in the toilet?" he quirks a brow, leaning against the sink and settling in - his body language a certain show that he isn't going anywhere any time soon. "6 months you've barely spoken to me, and you want to bring it all up now?"

"You're the one who followed me in here," you scowl, "You're the one who's been stalking me all night. Why are you even here, shouldn't you be out with whatever new girl you're fucking? It's Valentines Day, that's your schtick right, making them think you're invested before you pull the rug-,"

"You're talking a lot for someone who was throwing their guts up 2 minutes ago," he cuts you off, face curling defensively as your eyes meet his in a heated glare. "There is no new girl, so you can stop your little speech before you say something you regret."

"I don't have regrets." You snort, your arms shaking as you push yourself up a little.

"The circumstances we're currently under would suggest otherwise." He nods toward the toilet, eyes flickering carefully over you as your brows furrow - looking for any further signs of distress. Your skin has brightened up a little, tears crusted in the corner of your eyes, the tip of your nose reddened and your lips swollen. "Why are you even here? Thought you found your special guy," he mocks the words he had seen plastered on your story only a few weeks ago - a selfie of you with some loser, lips pressed to his cheek as he wore the dorkiest grin Jack has ever seen in his life. It had made his skin crawl. "Not special enough to whisk you away on some romantic weekend for the holiday, huh?"

Your scowl quickly dips into a frown, brows softening, glare melting and tears welling at your lash line. Your lips start to tremble, and Jack straightens up - not knowing if you're nauseous or upset.

“I hate Valentine’s Day,” you cry dramatically, leaning on your arm as you stay hunched over the toilet bowl.

“No you don’t,” Jack snickers, reaching to tuck your hair behind your ear and smoothing it into place, the touch of his fingers soft against your scalp and almost lulling you into a sense of calm. “You’re just drunk.”

“No, I hate it. It sucks,” you huff, “It’s a con and a scam and I’m sick of having it shoved in my face all month. I want it gone and I want it gone now.”

“Alright, Princess,” he mocks, “You never hated Valentines before, what happened?”

“I never hated a lot of things before,” you scowl again, eyes narrowed at the way his lip quivers in amusement - because of course he’d take pleasure in your misery.

It’s what he loves to do.

Only, it isn't your misery that's making him smile. It's just you - dramatic and exaggerated - looking him in the eye and talking in full sentences, or near enough. It feels like forever since he's had you like this.

"I got dumped. Again. You'll probably be happy to know that you're not alone in thinking I'm not worth your time."

"I didn't dump you," Jack defends himself, immediately, "And I don't think that."

He isn't lying either - technically the two of you were never in a relationship, so dumping was out of the question. He needed a break to focus on his recovery - focus on building himself back up for a full season, no distractions, no entanglements, and he hadn't thought either of you were in that deep for it to actually matter.

Until he started to miss you.

It took him mere days, hitting him like a tonne of bricks the first time he tried to text you and it wouldn't go through.

He was still in Michigan, you were in Jersey, and taking drastic measures to seek you out at the time felt a little too much for the casual circumstances you had both originally agreed to - friends with benefits, scratching each other's itches and relieving each others stress.

And then by the time he was back in town - it felt too late.

You still crossed paths, ran in the same circles, but you wouldn't speak to him anymore, and he didn't want to open any old wounds you were clearly trying to heal.

But he never stopped caring. Never stopped looking out for you when you got a little too drunk at parties, or watching your stories from Luke's phone, because you had him blocked on every platform.

And it's only now that you're in front of him, speaking to him again, that he realises the extent of how much he's missed you.

"Whatever," you sigh.

"No, not whatever," he shuffles along the floor, legs knocking into yours as he reaches out again, swiping the stubborn strand of hair that keeps falling forward back behind your ear and holding it in place. "I don't think that."

He tries to be assertive in saying it, this time - eyes locked on yours, grip firming up a little on your face, lowering his tone of voice until it sounds more sure - and he figures it works a little better, your tired eyes blinking slowly as the honesty seeps in.

You sigh, heavy in a way that makes your shoulders slump, your lips twisting as you look down.

You're quiet for a moment, and all Jack can do is watch - stuck in the same position, the same proximity - as you try to fight the tears. Something tugs, like an ache in the depth of his chest, a soreness that can only be remedied by holding you, he thinks. But he knows that isn't the right move.

You're not okay. You're drinking to mask your feelings, to the point of self-destruction, throwing up on your own in the bathroom at a party filled with all your friends, and it's all his fault.

"I'm sorry," is all he can think to say, a lump in the back of his throat as you give a resigned nod, still not meeting his eye. "I'm sorry that I was a dick, and I'm sorry the other guy was a dick. You deserve better than both of us."

A lone tear slips out, rolls down your cheek cinematically slow, and Jack swipes at it before it can fall, the pad of his thumb stroking gently at your jaw.

"I'm not gonna leave you," he promises, and you're probably too drunk to look any further into it, but he means it in more ways than he can possibly convey on a bathroom floor, your hair matted to your forehead and tears in your eyes. "I'm gonna look after you. I'm gonna get you home safe, and in the morning, we're gonna talk, okay?"

You nod again, looking up briefly into oceanic irises - a storm that once consumed you still swirling within them.

"Alright, c'mon, let's get you up." He stands before you do, shifting behind you with hands under your arms, holding your body against his as he leans over and flushes all the evidence of your intoxication away.

"Don't manhandle me," you huff.

"I'm just trying to-,"

"If you say help one more time, I'm gonna throw up all over your car."

He presses his lips together to save himself, nodding towards the door and gesturing for you to start heading out if you can do so by yourself. He hovers behind you the entire time, hand floating behind the small of your back, ready to catch you when you inevitably stumble on unsteady feet.

And when he finally gets you home, you don't let him go any further than your couch, shoving him down onto it and stomping off to your room, the slam of your door causing him to smile to himself - because despite all your defiance, the stomping, the slamming, the sulking and the sighs, you still let him back in.

And he's not going to let you go again.

[brokenmutations]

I love you in every universe

Logan Howlett • She/Her Pronouns • Mutant!Reader [Heightened Senses] • In every universe, broken or not, you will always love Logan Howlett. Even if he thinks he doesn’t deserve it • ANGST/SFW/NSFW - Nudity / Implied Sex • TW: Scars / Nightmares / Alcohol & Drug Consumption / Mentions of Recovery / Depression

“I love you”

Y/N froze in front of the mirror quickly zipping up her suit and turning to Logan.

“What?”

“I love you. I love you so much it hurts” Logan brought himself close, resting his hands on her hips as she places her hands on his chest before grabbing onto his jacket. “I love you Y/F/N Y/L/N since the first moment I laid eyes on you…”

Y/N didn’t utter a word at first as she couldn’t help but start tearing up. She tugged him down by the jacket bringing her lips to his, sealing the deceleration.

~

Logan frowns staring at the ceiling of the bedroom he shared with Wade and Al, both happen to be on either side of him. He wished he was in the same bed as her in this moment but Laura wanted time alone with her mom before she went back to taking jobs in the upcoming week and before Laura went back to the mansion.

“Stop thinking too loud” Wade groans rolling onto his back, taking his pillow and smacking Al to stop snoring. “What’s wrong, peanut?”

“I didn’t even move and you woke up”

“Like he said you thought too loud” Al groans, pointing at the door which prompted Logan to leave to have his loud thoughts out of the bedroom.

He half expected Wade to go back to bed, but the tired Deadpool followed shortly behind him with Dogpool at his feet.

“What were the loud thoughts this time?” Wade slumps over the armrest of the loveseat and slowly slipped into the cushions. Mary Puppins instantly jumping onto his back and circling to get comfortable. “Mmmm Puppins get comfy FASTER”

The Wolverine really feeds into the silent and broody type. He simply didn’t want to talk about it but he knows Wade will…keep it to himself.

…

Maybe not.

“I was thinking of my Y/N…” Logan frowns, resting his head in his hand getting lost in his thought once more but those words intrigued Wade a bit.

“Like…nightmare or…?” Wade lifts his head looking at Logan, growing confused to the concern expression on his face. “Nightmare. Listen, angel baby—-we all get the—-“

“Is it cheating if I fell in love with another version of her?”

If the blinks were audible, the amount of times Wade blinked would be loud enough to wake the neighborhood.

“You’re in love with Y/N???” Wade sat up too fast causing Puppins to fall off with a thud as she grumbles while trotting back to the bedroom knowing Al won’t kick her off. “Logan, this is the best thing to happen. You were destined for each other no matter what timeline or universe or whatever the fuck Marvel created—-It’s meant to be!”

Wade continued to go on a rant about destiny, and how Y/N might have the same kinks as his univer—-oh yeah.

Laura stood in the hallway hearing all of Wade’s rant because she stepped out to tell him to shut up, only to turn back around and head back inside to climb back into bed beside Y/N.

“What was it about this time?” Y/N gave Laura a tired but curious look, only to not receive an answer right away which brought a wave of concern. “What is it, hun?”

“Can’t you hear him?” Laura frowns turning her head toward her mom. “With your mutation”

The lie that brewed in an instant, only got thrown away the second Laura questioned.

“Yeah…I heard them” Y/N shifts to lay on her back, staring up at the ceiling with a blank expression as Laura’s was riddled with concern.

“Do you think…or are you…in love with him?”

“I…I don’t know what I feel. We haven’t…kissed or…things you shouldn’t be doing until you’re 30” Had to bring in the mom talk even if Laura rolled her eyes in response. “I’m still…mourning James even if I know he would want me to move on…”

“It’s been years…he would want you to be happy, mom” Laura frowns, bringing herself to snuggle into her mom as Y/N wrapped her arm around her to bring her closer. “I know it’s…another him but he still has his own sense of self”

“I know, I just want to take this slowly…there’s nothing wrong with wanting that” Y/N hums softly, resting her cheek on top of Laura’s head as she continues to snuggle into her mom. The night finally stilling…

________

“I love you”

Logan couldn’t help but have a shocked expression with hints of ‘are you sure?’ littered in the air. Y/N knew he’s thinking such and nodded. His felt his heart pounding in his chest, prompting him to step closer until there was no space between them.

“Say it again”

“I love you, James”

The tough exterior the Wolverine bares…instantly collapsed and tears started to form as he gently cradles her face in his hands pressing his forehead against hers. Y/N’s hands taking hold of his wrists, her eyes fluttering close.

“I love you…flaws and all”

________

Logan couldn’t help but stare at Y/N talking with their friends at one of Wade’s infamous parties. He looked down for a moment to take a sip of his Coke while fiddling with a chip in his fingers.

Six Months Sobriety

This party of Wade’s was to celebrate such, given after their time in the void he’s been celebrating a lot of the little things lately. Really any excuse to have a party.

“Congrats”

His eyes instantly shot up locking onto Y/N’s as she gave him a warm smile.

“Uh. Thanks…it’s nothin’”

“It’s everything” Y/N assures him, resting her hand on his bicep making Logan flex at first contact before relaxing. “Though I will say for a party to celebrate such, Wade really had to buy all the alcohol he can huh?” She scoffs playfully, earning a chuckle out of the man.

“He just needs excuses to have parties” Logan laughs softly, sipping his drink relaxing more that Y/N decided to stay beside him. “So uhm. Have you taken any jobs lately or…?”

Y/N tensed slightly at the question, bringing her gaze onto her own drink a second. “No…I’ve been too scared to” she admits through a whisper, hearing the shift beside her and the soft thud of a glass being set down. Before she was engulfed gently in Logan’s arms, prompting her to shift toward him and easing into his embrace.

“I won’t let anything ever happen to you like that again” Logan whispers, resting his chin on top of her head feeling her arms snake around his torso and her body relaxing.

After the party…Laura and Wade were passed out on the couch, Al had retreated to her room for a much needed coke break, and that leaves Logan and Y/N to clean up the aftermath. Y/N held the bin trailing behind Logan as he picked up the bottles putting them in there.

“Did Laura drink anything?”

“No, she took the theme of the party to heart and out of respect for you she didn’t have any alcohol” Y/N kept her voice low to avoid waking up anyone. “She’s only tired because she’s training with the X-Men now”

“Really?”

“Really. Which reminds me, she wants you there when she moves in. It’s a big step for her and she would appreciate you being there”

“I’m there” Logan smiles setting in the last few bottles and taking the bin from her to carry out. Y/N smiles warmly at him, grabbing the full trash bags to take out. Both turned to Mary Puppins scratching at the door to be let out. “Guess she can tag along” he scoffs, earning a laugh from Y/N as she grabs the leash for the pup to hook her up before they left.

The pup had a mind of her own dragging Y/N to her favorite spot to do her business, prompting Logan to take the bags from her watching the pup drag her across the street to pee on the tree near the repaired subway entrance.

After entering the alley to toss their trash and recycling, Logan walked over to Y/N noticing her shiver as she waited for Puppins to finish. He shrugged off his jacket and gently draped it over her shoulders, his touch lingering as she slowly turned to him with a smile.

“Thank you…”

“Of course” Logan brought his hands to adjust the jacket on her person, the lingering causing his heart to pound against his chest as her eyes instantly lock to his. She rests her hands gently on his chest bringing herself close resting her head against his chest. He instinctively wrapped his arms around her frame, kissing the top of her head.

Which led her to look up and without waiting another second, Logan leaned into her pressing his lips against hers. Her eyes flutter close when their lips connected. The rapid pounding of his heart relaxing as he melted into the kiss feeling her hands move from his chest to bring themselves on the back of his neck to keep him where he was. Continuing to kiss him, humming contently.

Little did they know Wade was in the fire escape watching the two, knowing he did a good by not cleaning. Well. It would’ve happened anyway at some point of the night. But at least there wasn’t…a huge audience.

After that night, every opportunity that arises Logan or Y/N would initiate either a quick kiss or a heavy make out that would approach the next base but both would stop. Neither were ready just yet.

“I can’t believe my daughter is going to boarding school” Wade, in the full suit, put on the hysterics as he tagged along with Logan and Y/N to help Laura move into the mansion. He instantly wrapped Laura in a tight hug which led her to look at Logan and Y/N pleading him to stop through her gaze while her claws extended.

“Wade, let go of her” Logan warns, crossing his arms and watching Laura start to stab the man making Y/N grimace beside him. “I warned him”

“She’s still going to visit just as much as Yukio and Ellie do” Y/N reassures watching him nod while yanking out Laura’s claws, the second they parted she instantly brought Laura into her arms.

“You’ll visit me too right?” Laura murmurs, gripping tightly on the back of Y/N’s shirt feeling her grasp tighten.

“Always. I will always be around my sweet girl” Y/N whispers to Laura feeling tears start to threaten her waterline as she tried her hardest not to cry. “You’re going to be great” she states, pull back to look at her daughter and feel that weight of fear lift knowing she’ll be safe with the X-Men and change/protect so many lives.

After a few more hugs and forehead kisses from Y/N, Laura parted from her mom and approached Logan who instantly hugged her when she opened her arms.

The two stood there for a while in silence, then a hushed whisper escaped Laura that made Logan tighten around her.

“You’ll take care of her, right dad?”

“Yeah…I’ve got her kid”

After getting her settled at the mansion, the three returned back to the apartments. Wade instantly went into his with a groan and crying out for Althea which could mean two things, coke or cuddles. Honestly, could be both. Logan lingered at his door for a moment debating of calling it a night when he looked at Y/N. Seeing she also lingered for a moment.

“Are you—-“

“You wanna take a walk? See where the night takes us?” Y/N gave him a small smile when asking as he didn’t reply with words, only a small nod and a hint of his own smile.

Walking through New York absent minded was a luxury in its own way. Especially when one knows she will be safe doing so. It was oddly nice going through the city and just enjoying the silence while hand in hand.

Y/N initially wanted to stay in the neighborhood, but quickly got distracted by how far they went that they ended up taking the subway. Logan wrapped his arm around her shoulders keeping her close as he felt her arms snake around his middle. It was late, not many people on the train, but they still kept close as if it was crowded.

Eventually they ended up in Central Park. Why? Who knows. The park at night is something else and Logan couldn’t remember the last time he’s been there, especially from his universe. But Y/N remembers her first time back in New York since everything…

Bringing Laura to Central Park for her first time…seeing the ducks…petting all the dogs…and just enjoying the area

Back then, Y/N would stand on the bridge thinking about James and missing him. But now she stands there with Logan being close and enjoying the night. She doesn’t think about what she misses for a moment and thinks about how much—-

“I love you”

Logan instantly locked eyes with her, not saying it back right away but acknowledging the pounding in his chest easing ever so slightly after hearing her say those words. Y/N didn’t walk away when he didn’t say it back but she cried when he admitted—-

“I fell in love with you the moment I met you again” and the man didn’t hesitate to shed a few tears when saying such. Which brought tears of her own to spill.

The two instantly held onto each other after such, letting go of a lot of emotion built on anxiety and fear alone. But slowly became holding onto one another out of love and a sense of reunion. They both love and will forever have a bond with their universe’s other half, but this was new and different…something they’ve waited for and could only get from them.

Logan kept Y/N close, holding her for what felt like hours…but realistically until it got too late into the night. He held her hand all the way back to the subway then back to their apartments and before he even thought of asking, Y/N pulled him close standing on her tippy toes to bring her lips perfectly onto his.

He didn’t hesitate any longer to pick her up, continuing to kiss her as she stumbles blindly to unlock her door not parting from his lips for a moment. The second the lock kicked, Logan pushed the door open with his foot letting them inside and closing the door with the same foot. Slowly making their way into the bedroom and sharing that moment in private. But let me just say, Wade got the dirty details out of Y/N when he convinced her to take edibles with him.

Being the hour that it was, Y/N laid comfortably naked on top of Logan. Both looking at the window and watching the sunlight spill in as she snuggles her face against his chest sighing contently to the sound of his heartbeat.

“I love you, Y/N” Logan whispers, feeling her shift on top of him getting more comfortable. Feeling the warmth grow in his chest as he looks at her watching her gaze lock onto his.

“I love you too, Logan”

[taelophone]

Red Rimac. Luigi Mangione x StreetRacer!Reader Vol. 1

trigger warnings ─ gambling . illegal street racing . reader is kind of mean . exclusion . "gang activty" but not really . 5k+ words . you shift POVs a lot .

StreetRacer!Reader. Moodboard. Other Parts.

Summer was a time to roam the streets from the early morning hours to the low and late strokes of night. Life was always better when it didn’t get dark until eight o’clock— at least if you didn’t have a job.

Spending hours upon hours hunched over a computer screen is not only bad for your tan, but also, the digital strain and binary brain rot tended to gnaw at the pink matter of most computer science majors' brains. Summer, in all her warm and floral glory, was a time for poor, sleepless, and  programmed zombies to emerge from their cold and dark labs to enjoy some rare sunlight.

Luigi, in all his nerdy and left-brained glory, just so happened to align with the stereotype like the shimmering stars in their native sea of navy blue.

In the mornings, he lurched, his eyes hazy and unfocused as his pale knuckles clung to whatever life he had left in his soul. All-nighters soon turned to insomnia, the lack of rest stinging the whites of his eyes and attempting to force the windows to his soul shut every time he stood still for more than thirty seconds.

Life goes on, things grow and things change, and another day means another opportunity to improve himself and work towards bettering his arsenal of skills. Another day, another play.

He spent his morning getting ready for the day— going on an early morning run, sending around some emails, reading a couple of chapters of his newest addition to his near-crowded bookshelf, and listening to a couple of podcasts while he did the dishes. Just a slow morning to match the slow and steady hum of the urban neighborhood that rested just outside his front door.

Somewhere in the distant future, a slightly older Luigi is watching him right now from a memory that would feel vintage. Perhaps he's looking back and smiling proudly, admiring the dedication he had since the ripe age of twenty years old.

But when Luigi’s phone rang and Pico’s name projected itself on his screen in those thin white letters, future Luigi could only laugh and shake his head about the butterfly that fluttered into Luigi’s life, her white wings ready to create a life-altering butterfly effect.

“Yo, hey man, what's up?” He answered, pressing the speaker icon on the glassy screen.

“Yo, Pep, I found this underground racing thing slash car show. It’s supposed to have custom cars, cool bikes, helmets, slingshots, and a couple of Dylan’s classmates actually know one of the girls who’s racing today. We’re going at nine, do you want to come with us?” He asked, his staticky and slightly fuzzy voice blaring through Luigi’s phone speaker.

“Uhh, maybe? You said it’s like a car show? Isn’t street racing illegal?” Luigi asked, balancing his phone between his face and shoulder as he folded up the last components of his laundry.

“Please don't start asking questions,” Patrick sighed.

“Saying don’t ask questions when you’re asking me to go commit a crime with you is crazy,” he chuckled, his mouth coming up into a panicked smile as both of his brows furrowed with slight concern.

“It should be fine, I think…Dylan says they’re invite-only, so no snitches, plus they’re never held in the same area more than twice. It’s at a frat house an hour over, actually,” he explained.

“Pico, I don’t think this is very smart—“ Luigi began, the idea mulling over his mind again and again, juicing it dry of the sour taste it left on his tongue.

“Luigi, no offense – you don’t go outside. We need to have you outside this summer,” he snickered, and Luigi swore he could almost hear his brows rise and fall on the other line. “And let’s not pretend like you aren’t a jaywalking warrior.”

“Either they hit me and kill me, or I live. It’s a win-win situation,” Luigi chuckled, sucking in a deep breath of air as he thought about his decision carefully.

On one hand, he had a lot to lose in life. A scholarship, a good sense of moral ground, and a spot at a nice Ivy League university nestled right in the heart of the city he loved more than anything in the world. 

Temptation is an evil temptress, and man has been known to fall for her tricks time and time again. Luigi was better than no man and found himself falling victim to her stirred cup of curiosity every once in a while.

He could be weak just once, he thought. After all, it seems like a fun one-time thing he likely won’t get to experience again, right?

“I think I’ll go actually…but I’m not driving, hell no,” he answered, punctuated by a small sarcastic chuckle at the end of his sentence.

“Type shit, type shit,” Patrick beamed, immediately texting Luigi his address again. “We’re gonna meet at my house, and then I’ll drive us.”

“Cool, thanks,” he nodded, listening to Patrick’s laggy and loud goodbye before they both hung up the phone.

Boop, boop, boop!

“Chris, can you get me a soda from the kitchen!?”

Your voice echoed through the hallway, bouncing off the empty walls and doing its best to maneuver through the loud vibration of Do What I Want by Lil Uzi Vert. When he didn’t respond, you huffed, adjusting your red and ivory varsity jacket before you waltzed down the hall a bit further from the bathroom.

“Chris!” You shouted, leaning over the black iron railing.

“Yeah?” He shouted back, immediately lifting his gaze from the living room couch.

“Can you get me a soda!?” You repeated.

“Absolutely not, get it yourself,” he beamed, adjusting the white rim of his red Chicago Bulls cap on his head.

“You’re evil, get out of my house…” You groaned, making your way back to the bathroom to continue finishing your makeup.

Tonight would mark your third race this summer, and your twenty-ninth in the past year. The month of June was always the slowest, but you were more than ready for things to kick off in early July.

You had been racing since just seventeen years old, ripping and tearing through streets at a pace no sane woman would ever see on their speedometer. At first, you were doing it for a rush, but it quickly became lucrative the more experience and speed you got.

Bets were made, donations flowed, crowds flocked, and cash was cashed the more you managed to claw your way through the asphalt. Your quiet and academic-driven life slowly began to sound like the inside of a crowded casino, slots clinking and money fluttering every time you stepped into the driver's seat.

You dabbed some highlighter on the tip of your nose, blending it out with the pad of your middle finger before looking over your outfit one more time. Red and ivory varsity jacket, low rise deep blue flares with large slits at the calves, a black tube top, and black Air Force Ones to tie everything together! Cute.

“When are Pink and Dhakiya coming?” You asked, making your way down the stairs to retrieve your black leather purse and a pair of glossy black browline glasses from the side table. 

“Uhh…” Chris murmured, immediately flipping through his Snap to check his messages again. “Pink should be pulling up now, and ‘Kiya is gonna meet us there…she’s going with Dylan, and apparently he’s bringing some new bitches, so…” he chuckled, shaking his head in very obvious disapproval.

“You need to stop dropping addresses for him…he cannot keep his mouth closed, my fucking god…” you sighed, rolling your eyes as far as your sockets would allow before collapsing down onto the cotton fabric of your grey couch.

“Chill, Dylan’s fine. More people, more money…” he huffed, raising a brow at you before reading a text on his phone and snapping a pic of the corner of his bright green eye for a streak photo.

“Yeah, but he’s gonna get us fucking caught…” you huffed. “Who’s on lookout? Also, do we still have scanners?” You asked, flipping through your photo album titled ‘Firee’ and looking back on all the irresponsible memories you made in a car.

“Yeah. But we don’t need them anyway, we’re going to Bryce’s…playground, or whatever he calls it,” Chris nodded. “It’s good, you’ll like it. Big fucking villa, massive roads, and a big garage that can hold like thirty people.”

“That actually sounds nice,” you hummed, propping yourself up on your elbows to face Chris. “Who we driving? Pluto or Dashielle?”

“Dash, obviously,” Chris scoffed, half a chuckle lightening the end of his declaration. 

He tossed the glossy, cherry-stained, and futuristic-looking key fob with your abundance of glimmery and glittery charms and keepsakes. Just as you pulled yourself off the couch, your bones cracking from slight exhaustion, the cherry oak front door came swinging open to reveal a tall and skinny young woman with a large curly black bun.

“Blitzen!! Baby!” She beamed, the golden grillz full of diamonds and spades on full display under the white fluorescent light of your living room.

You gasped, jumping up off the couch with a bright grin. “Pink!!”

You met her halfway, two steps away from the couch and two more away from the front door before you engulfed each other in a tight and wobbly hug. The woman wore a red tank top with little white bows on the spaghetti straps and the smallest low-rise jean shorts you could wear without being charged for public indecency.

Her slim stiletto heels clicked and clacked on the glossy dark hardwood floors, alerting the house to her presence as she frantically sipped the sweaty Coors Light in her hand.

“I’m so excited to be outside again!” She huffed, bending slightly at the knee as she pretended to lose her footing momentarily to signify how bored she had been this year. “Psychology was a mistake, Calnan has been killing me slowly, literally.”

“Girl…you don’t even wanna know what they’re putting me through,” you sighed, clipping your keys around your belt loop as Chris rose to his feet and stretched, his white wife beater riding up slightly.

“Alright, let’s go…the drive is like forty-five minutes, so we’ll get there at like six-twenty. You can do some donuts and show off the car,” he hummed, making his way out the front door.

You scrambled into your car as a group of three, kissing the hood of your red wheels before popping into the front seat and letting the icy breeze from the air conditioning fill the Cupid-red leather interior of your car. With Pink connected to the aux, the soles of the seats vibrated with the heavy bass and loud treble of some violent rap that prompted you into the afternoon distance.

Meanwhile, Luigi was cooped up in the passenger seat of a silver Chevrolet Camaro. The lyrics to Headlines by Drake filled the car, pressing against the glass as he scrolled on his phone to distract himself from the anxiety that rose the hairs on his arms and legs. 

When they reached their destination, they saw a large Mediterranean-style home that was jam-packed with extremely extravagant cars— some were custom, built from the rims to the wings, some were customized beyond belief, and some were wrapped in various colors and textures of car wraps.

Emerging from the dim light in the back of Patrick’s car, he saw a sea of moving bodies that chatted and chirped as more seemed to nest in the bright garage. Everyone appeared to be nursing some sort of cold beverage, be it a Solo cup of mystery or a fresh can of carbonation with beads of condensation clinging to the tin.

“I’d rather not have my car get vandalized, so I’m gonna park across the street. Go in, Dylan should be somewhere in the house,” Patrick urged, a half-giddy smile on his face before he pulled his car off into the distance. 

With Patrick gone, Luigi made his way up the stairs to the front porch, the sloped incline raising the greyscale home with black iron windows and ash-brown double front doors, slowly filling out more and more as he neared the front entrance.

His ears indulged in the music before his eyes took in the sight, the heavy vibration of Time Of Our Lives by Ne-Yo and Pitbull biting his ear with every word that Mr. Worldwide spent talking about his trials and tribulations. Now that he had a clear view of the front lawn and the side, his eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets as he saw the cars and women present.

A brunette with black roots in an all-American bikini top, the warm and humid sunset breeze kissing the freckles that ran up and down her arms as a man with a matte black helmet that had been scribbled on by many people across many timelines of his life. A McLaren 720S with bright pink glossy paint and heart-shaped rims that seemed to belong to a young lady not far from the cooler.

She, too, was dressed in all pink; from the cropped leather jacket with Hello Kitty patches all over the front, to the miniskirt that adorned her hips which undoubtedly made it impossible to bend more than fifty degrees. There were people everywhere, grillz in mouths that danced like flappers— flappers who complimented the heavy fur coats and exorbitant diamonds and gold.

If Luigi tried hard enough, he could almost match every person to a car. The flashier the vehicles, the brighter the bearer seemed to glimmer under the reddish summer sunlight.

He didn’t dare speak to any of them— not when he was dressed like an outcast with a bank balance in the negatives. By no means was Luigi poor, absolutely not— but he found himself a little timid as people walked by and looked him up and down.

He wasn’t intruding, but it was damn obvious nobody knew his face. In this new world, he had been forcibly thrown into by the eager whims of his best friend, real recognized real, and he was a very unwelcome face.

He felt like a fraud just being there. He decided it was best if he tore his eyes away from the beautiful machinery in favor of finding the actual person who permitted him to be here in the first place.

His feet carried him before his racing mind could, nearly tripping over the spilled beer cans that were hydrating the freshly mowed blades of grass. The front door was wide open— just enough to accommodate the big egos and even bigger wallets that flowed in and out of the archway.

His eyes scanned over the crowd, cherry-picking his favorite outfits of the evening as he wiggled through the hallway to the kitchen in pursuit of Dylan. There seemed to be a common theme amongst the young women in attendance— bikini tops that left very little to the imagination, or maybe the occasional tank top paired with some form of low-rise jeans.

Accessories clinked and twinkled, allowing him a moment to get familiar with what sound each person’s soul made when allowed a moment to express themselves. Dull, chunky sounds of maximalist resin bangles, sharp and starlike twinkles of gold and silver chains or necklaces, and heavy thunks of rubber soles on heels or sneakers against the hardwood floors.

He found Dylan in the west hall, a golden yellow smile on his teeth as he conversed with a brown-skinned woman wearing a red tube top with black leather split-hem pants.

“Yo, Luigi! You’re outside! For the first time in forever!” He cheered, greeting Luigi with a firm dap and an intimate side hug. “Glad to see you could make it! Where’s Pico?”

“Hey, man! Yeah, Pico said he’s gonna park across the street. So what’s going on, is this like, a party? What’s happening?” He asked, exchanging polite waves and upward nods with the woman next to Dylan.

“Hello…I’m Dhakiya,” she said, giving him a polite smile.

“Oh, yeah, this is Dhakiya, her friend is hosting today. Uhhh.., we’re waiting for Chris, Pink, and Red Rum to get here, then she’s gonna race against Half Moon…” Dylan said, the aliases rolling off his tongue and losing their way to Luigi’s brain as his brows furrowed.

“Who names their kid Pink…” he said, more of a statement than a question as he ignored the lingering stares from people who passed him by.

“Nah, her name’s not actually Pink, we just call her that…but they should—“ He began, the childish flower clips at the end of his two strand twists clinking together as he abruptly turned his head to face the sudden sound of a door slamming open.

“AYO! BLITZ IS OUTSIDE, ERR’BODY GET THE FUCK OUT!”

There was a flash of clamor, bodies all traveling in one direction as each person scrambled for a way out the door with large smiles and eager chatter.

He heard the sound of a loud engine revving, tires screeching and squealing in pain as they drifted and rubbed against the asphalt. A nasty, grim, and ghostly hood of smoke fizzled from underneath your tires.

A testament to your speed, darkened friction marks imprinted themselves on the road as you did donut after donut in the street. Patrick had found Luigi standing in shock at the top of the hill, watching as your red Rimac looped over and over in the wide road below.

Cheers and exclamations of excitement filled the air, limbs pushing and shoving as everyone clumped together to witness the speedy display. To Luigi’s surprise, a woman rolled down the passenger side window just to sit on the ledge and stick her tongue out in triumph.

She yelled, her nonsensical whoops of freedom piercing through the crowd and the now-hushed music before the glossy vehicle whipped into the large driveway.

Chris emerged from the back, and the woman in the window spun around to drop her feet on the floor with a bright, silver smile. Soon, a young woman with a red varsity jacket and low-rise jeans that hugged her up so good it restored his faith in flare jeans emerged from the driver's seat.

You emerged from your car, fanning your face free of the smoke that Chris had huffed and puffed in the back. A little bit of showing off never hurt anybody, and the crowd seemed to enjoy seeing the little figure eight of friction marks you left scorching on the road.

You smiled, watching as a familiar man with a golden grin approached you to give you daps and welcome you to Bryce’s old car workshop, or playground, as he referred to it. 

“Welcome, welcome! Pep, Pico, c’mere!” He called, beckoning over two tall men in your direction. 

One was much broader in the shoulders, his extremely casual monochrome Adidas hoodie adorning his trained and disciplined muscles. You definitely didn’t recognize the chocolate brown curls or the jet-black hair of the lean man with raccoon-like eyebags next to him.

“This is Patrick, and this is Luigi. They’re new…they’re my Phi-Psi brothers,” Dylan smiled, matching a name to a face as he wrapped an arm around either of their shoulders.

“I could tell, don’t worry…” you stated, raising your brows at their white cargo shorts and blue skinny jeans that didn’t scream usual crowd…or race etiquette. Stepping out of the house looking so casual was a choice— not a good one, but a choice nonetheless.

You gave them a half-nod, clutching at Pink’s hand as she joined you in looking the two men up and down.

“Hmm…well, have fun. You leave here, this didn’t happen,” you smiled, the ends of your lips forcing themselves upwards in a grin that lacked emotion in the eyes.

“Yeah, of course…I like your car,” Patrick said, eyeing up your wheels like a child spotting their first sugar fix of the day.

Candied apples, dripping with red syrup and glossed up by the sweet fading sunlight. You turned around, admiring the black wing and how low it sat on the asphalt before facing the men again.

“Thanks…” you murmured, nodding slowly before pushing your way past the three in pursuit of your opponent, Half Moon.

You found his car quite quickly, that gorgeous shade of blue-black, high wing, and as many illegal mods as he could cram into its internal organs without making a mechanic question his origins. Chevrolet Corvette Stingray— a beautiful hymn of words that purred like a well-fed kitten on the streets.

“Half Moon! What’s good, what’s good!” You squealed, eagerly jogging up to the man decorated with a matte black helmet complete with cat ears and a pitch-black visor.

He wasn’t wearing a shirt, only a stack of silver chains that clinked and clattered as he moved. A large moon spanned across his chest in its third quarter phase, along with one full sleeve of snakes and vines across his left arm.

His pants sagged so low you could see about twenty percent of his black Calvin Klein boxers, they poked out from underneath his black ripped jeans like a loud reminder of his careless demeanor.

“A’sup, Blitz,” he greeted, pulling you into a tight side hug and chuckling beneath the helmet. “Aye, no hard feelings, but we went like sixty to forty in the bets. I will gladly take the remaining forty people put on your car.”

”Hell nah, I’m taking all sixty home tonight. Bills to pay, tuition to fund…no hard feelings,” you snickered, furrowing your brows at his cocky and zealous statement.

“Sure…See I got respect for you, cuz you stayin’ in school, but don’t bet your future on no car…” he advised, tilting his obscured head at your ‘naïveté’.

“It’s not a bet if I know I’m gonna win, though…” you smiled, giving him a polite nod before retreating to your car with Pink.

Luigi, merely a bystander from the sidelines, watched as the man named Half Moon pulled his car around next to yours, aligning himself perfectly parallel with your candied automobile. His nerves seemed to climb by the second, despite not being involved in anything that was happening around him. 

He watched as the crowd began to walk down to the road, letting you and Half Moon peel out of the driveway just as smoothly as the pair of you had pulled in. Some bystanders dragged with them some sort of chair to sit on, while some chose to stand and guzzle down whatever remained of their drink, and many clutched onto others as a man with two large trays walked around and collected fat stacks of money from each member who cared enough to bet.

With a roar of the ignition, each cold and clean-cut car seemed to spring to life on the spot. White and foggy smoke puffed from your exhaust, shots like bullets sputtering and sparking from each car’s rear as one brave woman stepped in front of both cars to set up the make-shift lighting system, something Chris had referred to in Luigi's ear as the “Christmas tree.”

His lungs had never felt fuller, and his eyes had never been so still in his life. He wasn’t exactly fond of your introduction to him, but he did have to admit your car was grabbing his attention more than he’d like to admit under these circumstances.

Each engine growled, your Rimac angry and hot like a dragon gearing up to bring fire to the front lawn. Loud, resentful, and eager to devour the purr of the quiet and kitten-like engine next to you.

If Luigi strained his ears enough, he could tell exactly what car was making what sound over the noise. Even the smoke that flowed from your vehicles was different, yours came out in a steady stream of cotton-like clouds that faded much quicker than Half Moon’s.

His heart pounded against his chest cavity, the blood rushing to his ears as his anxiety and anticipation forced his eyes forward on the cars in front of him. To say he was nervous was a criminal understatement— if at any moment the cops decided to show up, everyone was done for.

His thoughts only turned off when he saw a tall, almost hazardously skinny woman dressed in an all-white bikini and blue Moon Boots strut her way in front of the cars in a blue cropped fur hoodie that seemed to swallow her arms and head whole.

“Alright! Ladies and men, I wanna welcome you to Bryce’s playground! Three things before we get started: I need both drivers to check their seatbelts, and verify that their airbags are indeed in check! Make sure that your dash cam is on and that any potential passengers or guests are not recording at this very moment!” she announced, taking an old-fashioned pistol out of her fuzzy coat pocket.

“When you hear my pistol go off, that is your sign to make your way down from this very road down to that red barn we see in the distance!” She shouted, turning around to point at the run-down-looking barn that appeared to be no farther than about a mile. “And for my newcomers, if we have any with us tonight, we’d like to welcome you on behalf of my dear darling boyfriend, and point out that if this happens to get leaked and you decide to go tattling, we are very good at covering our tracks! That being said, BUCKLE THE FUCK UP!”

Blood rushed through your veins, adrenaline fogging your mind as your foot teased the gas oh so subtly. The car practically vibrated with the force of the engine, the turbos in your car’s guts forcing as much air in the combustion as physically possible.

She growled like a dragon, your little leather seats shaking in learned fear as you waved at Half Moon from the window on your right. You offered him a kind smile and a thumbs up before focusing on the long strip of road ahead of you, shooting up a silent prayer to any god that could protect your life as she had done many times before.

“On your mark!” Lucy said, her manicured finger teasing the trigger of her pistol with the most determined and nonchalant expression you’ve ever seen someone in her shoes don. 

“Get set…”

Before you knew it, the Christmas tree flashed two green lights and the bullet had dispatched from its fiery chamber. The bang was loud enough to render the weakest of the pack deaf, weeding out the runts that found themselves hindered by their inability to recognize the call of two fanged predators ready to hunt.

Your foot slammed down on the gas, sending you flying forward as your car rapidly gained speed at an alarming rate. Two hundred and thirty miles per hour in just three point eighty-three seconds— your front wheels departed from the floor, the front of the car bearing the brunt of your speed as your opponent made a hearty attempt to close the distance that had built in such a short amount of time.

It was like watching the son of Satan chase after his father's red robes of fury; he was practically riding your ass with how close he was, but it wasn’t enough.

Pink screamed and giggled her head off, her heels kicked up on the dash as the air raided your windows and made quick work of sending your hair flying in every direction it was able. With this kind of speed and horsepower, the tightest of curls never even stood a chance.

The roar of the dragon was heard all the way back at the playground, her claws ripping up the asphalt as she flew forward in a manner that should defy the laws of physics. Her wings aided her escape as her tires came screeching at the barn, reaching her destination a mere two seconds earlier than the runt she left behind.

After the smoke cleared and the smell of scorched rubber dissipated from the air, you got out of your car to give Half Moon a firm handshake and a fist bump.

“Sorry. I’m too good at school to not be able to pay for it,” you smiled, watching as he flipped open his visor to reveal a slightly defeated but impressed smile.

“God damn, what are you feeding that thing? What mods you got?” He asked, walking around the front of your car to observe what rested under the hood.

“There’s a couple of E-turbos in there…she’s an electric engine, so I gotta treat her right,” you nodded. “You’re not gonna see ‘em under the hood though.”

“Smart girl…” he hummed, shutting the car hood with a nod. “How much was she? No way you get this while still in college…”

“Maybe two million…? But I bought it for much cheaper from a friend from school once I started getting my bread together. Chris, actually…he said he was making an investment, whatever that means,” you shrugged.

“Smart man,” he chuckled, climbing back into his car to make his way back to the playground. “I have no idea where you got the money, much less Chris’ dumbass, but I’m not gonna question it.”

“Thanks,” you nodded, returning to your front seat and giving celebratory hugs to Pink.

You clawed your way back up the hill, parking your car back in the driveway as you stepped out to the crowd thundering with cheers and celebrations. It seemed as though anyone who bet more than three dollars on Half Moon began to grow upset, groans and grunts of loss mingling in with the loud applause as you faced the orchestra of joy.

You stepped out with Pink, your tongue out in triumph as your hands motioned for more applause. If there was a time to boast and gloat, it was now or never.

You were young, rich, and played in the face of the almighty grim reaper on a day-to-day basis. Your earnings were served like cold ice cream after thrashing about in a heated jacuzzi.

The large and fat platter of cash was handed to you, featuring a couple of rings and necklaces that were offered up rather than cash that could be flipped for their value in gold. The celebration was short-lived in all its right, and you watched as the gaudily dressed individuals filed into their respective cars and hopped on bikes after retrieving photographic evidence of their whereabouts that they’d inevitably boast about on social media.

You had taken about fifty photos within the following ten minutes. Posing with girls in the tiniest bikinis, men in the darkest outfits that would be considered emo if they weren’t coupled with bright and flashy jewelry. Most people had left, and you were just left with Chris, Pink, Dylan, Dhakiya, and the riffraff Dylan had brought along.

“That was tough as shit, B! I see you! Dustin’ hoes in your lil’ candy car, okay!” Dylan praised, eagerly patting your shoulder as Dhakiya came over beside him with a fat joint between her fingers. 

“Breaking Half’s streak is crazy,” she said, a bright smile on her face that contrasted her heavy lids that were pink from the Mary Jane.

“Thank you, thank you,” you smiled, giving high fives and hugs all around before Luigi and his friend came around.

“That was really cool…” Luigi murmured, child-like admiration woven in his tone while his brows shot up with shock.

“Thank you,” you smiled, nodding your head as Chris brought you over a cold pineapple Fanta.

He was new, and maybe you were being a little mean…his beady black doe eyes pulled at your heartstrings, plucking out of tune notes of empathy underneath your hardened demeanor. He was just looking for a good time, and it felt a little hypocritical to wave him off like a flea-bitten stray. 

In a way, you could almost see your past self beyond the windows of his soul. Staring back at you with that same wonderstruck expression. It was hard to not offer small talk when he was just so cute…like a little dumb baby!

“I remember watching my first race,” you hummed, taking a deep swig from the aggressively carbonated drink that stung deep in your nostrils, but after being subjected to car hotboxes so sweltering that your eyes stung from the smoke, not much could affect your nasals.

“It was hell. The dude I bet on lost terribly. Then he crashed out and started yelling, but god damn those cars were sexy,” you chuckled.

You watched as Patrick began conversing with Chris and Dylan, exchanging numbers and information with Dhakiya before delving into a conversation about future car shows and any potential races coming up.

“Man, that’s rough…but you did really good! I thought your car was gonna flip backward at one point,” he chuckled. “How is your car even that fast…they said you got there in like sixteen seconds!”

“I can’t tell you,” you smiled. “It’s a secret…maybe if I see your face a couple more times I’ll tell you.”

“Oh, I see…” he beamed, his brows pinching together as he nodded down at you. “No respect for the new guy, I see.”

“Nope. You might be a fed,” you joked, pretending to pat him down for a wire.

“Absolutely not,” he laughed, shaking his head and watching as you counted your earnings from the large silver tray.

“That’s a lot of money…” he nearly whispered, watching as you counted blue-tinted hundred-dollar bills at the speed of light.

“What money?” You teased, raising a brow at him and pausing with your shuffling. “I didn’t earn any money. I got this from my safe at home…”

“Oh yeah, right, totally. I forgot, how ignorant of me,” He nodded.

��Yo! B, let’s go! Cops get wind, we’re all fucked. Don’t act brand new in front of your lil’ friend,” Dylan called.

You paused, giving the man a sly nod and a grin as you shoved all of the wads of money into your black purse.

“Maybe I’ll see you again, maybe I won’t. If I do, don’t show up like this again,” you beamed, gesturing at Luigi’s sandals and relatively generic outfit. “And wear red…it’s my color.”

“Sure…I can do that,” he chuckled.

“Now get, before Bryce rolls up and calls the cops on you.”

“Yes ma’am.”

You climbed back into your car, tossing your keys up front to Chris as you slumped in the back seat to take a hard-earned nap. Something in the atmosphere told you that you would see him again, whether it be at a new race or maybe at a local Trader Joe’s. 

Wherever it was that you’d cross paths, you were sure you’d recognize those spiral curls of cocoa and his firm voice that trembled and fumbled when he spoke. And as you unzipped your purse to count your money, you let him fade into the back of your mind to become a distant memory until you’d have to put a name to his face once more.

[mariasont]

i feel like you’re edging me by not writing smut but being so good at pining

LOL WAIT STOP I DO WRITE SMUT (and im so open to everyone's smutty requests, send them in!!!)

i just fear im not very good at it, so i definitely dont post as much as my pining fics hehe

smut fics 18+ (minors be gone pls) below the cut

aaron hotchner

negotiation with mr. h part 1 & part 2 freaky ass nanny tries to seduce her employer & it works

ideas from a book hotch comes home to you reading some freaky shit about gun play and turns your fantasy into a reality

let me take care of you you have a shitty day at work so aaron takes care of you in the bath (wink wink)

no vacancy typical omg! we have to share a hotel room except hotch is a perv and he's been waiting on this moment for a while

laced with love bimbo!assistant!reader uses hotch's money to buy some lingerie and he shows his appreciation when he gets home

space between distraction & indulgence bimbo!assistant wants hotch's attention while he's working so she's pulling out all the stops (if you're catching my drift)

spencer reid

hands, hands, hands you and spencer compare hands and that starts to make you wonder what it would look like wrapped around his dick! basically!

framed fascination spencer really really likes your glasses and wants to show you just how much in a storage closet

looking after you you're sick so spencer takes care of you by giving you head, except morgan and garcia show up & you get caught red handed

undo you bimbo!receptionist!reader & spencer has sexy time and he's determine to ruin you for anyone else

spencer reid x reader x aaron hotchner

the hypothesis spencer x reader x aaron where they have a hypothesis (wow creative) on the best way to create arousal and you just so happen to make the perfect test subject

[theambitiouswoman]

“This is just how I am”

We’ve all said it: This is just how I am. Maybe it’s how you handle stress, conflict or tricky situations. But what if our “personality” is really just a bunch of coping mechanisms we’ve developed to get through tough times? It’s not who we are, but who we needed to be to survive.

Our brains are smart & create survival strategies when life gets chaotic. These strategies like withdrawing, getting defensive, or shutting down weren’t random; they helped us back then at some point. But as life changes so do our needs (cue self sabotaging behaviors & self victimization).

With mindful awareness, we can realize which of these patterns still work for us & which ones we need to move on from.

This isn’t about criticizing yourself, it’s about noticing that you’re ready to grow into a version of yourself that fits now, not the past. That you are not a product of your past. That your pain didn’t turn you into someone you are not. That the people who hurt you, won. Your brain has the ability to adapt and evolve, so you can make room for healthier habits, emotions, behaviors.

Instead of saying, “This is just how I am,” ask: What if I could be different? You’re not stuck with old patterns forever. You can’t blame your future, even your present forever. You can rewrite the story in a way that truly feels like you.

[durgeapologist]

Omg your blog is such a relief. Every day I feel more and more like I want to distance myself from about 80% of the Solavellan community bc I am telling you it is ROUGH being into the egg and wanting to talk about him but being surrounded by people who think that everyone and their mother is out to get them. Meanwhile someone can come up with valid criticisms about how Lavellan's characterization was handled in VG and get swarmed with unsolicited opinions about solrook shippers and accusations of misogyny. I also see them running around in posts that are clearly marked as "Critical" And half the time when I CAN talk to them about Solas it's like they aren't even talking about the same character I am? They want him to be some helpless little abuse victim who isn't responsible for anything he does??? Why are we redeeming him if he did nothing wrong? What would be the point? We love him because he's fucked up and a manipulative bastard but also complex???? Did we play the same game girlies???

i have been staring at this ask since it came in trying to find a normal way to respond to you anon i will be so fr rn so i am so sorry it's taken a few hours

i’ll start with this:

“Why are we redeeming him if he did nothing wrong?”

full stop. this. so much. (i am in love with you anon) why is there a atonement/redemption ending if he did nothing wrong? (you’re literally so real) solas has done horrendous things. like genuinely abhorrent. (i crave to be your friend so bad anon) he is a genocidal, serial killing, manipulative lying cunt. to say the least. AND THAT IS WHY I LOVE HIM. he has such complex characteristics that make him so intriguing. he wants to be a good person. but he doesn’t really know how to be genuine. he is riddled with guilt and regret. he feels BAD about the things he has done. but he doesn’t want to face his mistakes. he knows he has done absolutely terrible things in the name of his people and their liberation, things most of them never asked him to do. some even asked him to NOT DO THOSE THINGS. did he listen? of course not! this is solas we are talking about. arrogant, prideful, calculating solas.

“They want him to be some helpless little abusive victim who isn’t responsible for anything he does.”

yes. yep. THIS SO BAD. (genuinely let me be your friend pls i am on my knees begging) the dynamic between solythal gets convoluted by most solasmancers because of three things: misogyny, jealousy, and ignorance. was there abuse? yeah. not denying that. was there only abuse? no. mythal was a victim of abuse herself. the way she learned to love, she passed down to solas. BOTH were victims of abuse who did terrible, no good, awful things. BOTH were also extremely powerful, omnipotent, and power-hungry individuals. mythal's hunger for power showcased differently than solas' and was amplified (IMO) by elgar'nan whispering in her ear. solas had felassan to keep him in check.

i am of the UPMOST certainty that had solas not taken down the evanuris the way he did and went to sleep after creating the veil, he would have become another tyrant ruling over the elven people. (THE MASKED EMPIRE ANYONE? HELLO? HELLOOOOO?) also anyone who says she was his MOTHER or SISTER?? god please drown me. put me in a tub and hold my head under water. that was his PARTNER AND HIS LOVER. i cannot with the takes that she raised his ass COME ON. i have sooooo much more to say about this dynamic and the themes of abuse AND how solasmancers twist it to make her this most evil, vile, horrible woman; but i would like to keep some of my followers tbh (anon i am frothing at the mouth if you want to discuss this further i beg you to dm me) so we shall move on.

"...valid criticisms about how Lavellan's characterization was handled in VG..."

yeah full stop i will never forgive them for making her one personality type. sorry, i just won't. my lavellan egg-mancer was a strong-willed and angry proud dalish woman who told solas off every chance she could! i am genuinely so happy people who wanted the dynamic we got in VG got that, because that is how their lavellan is/was, but what about the lavs who punched him? who told him to stop being an asshole about elves, and just farmed approval for the romance by asking questions? i chose to hunt his ass down BECAUSE I WANTED TO HUNT HIS ASS DOWN! my lavellan would not be so understanding or forgiving, she just wouldn't, so it feels like my girl's personality was ripped away from her fr. now, i DO NOT agree with some of the takes on how she was presented because those criticisms are in fact riddled with misogyny and most are just downright vile. but i do agree with the criticisms that not all lavellans would have been so kind to that bald man.

so anon, TRUST me when i say i feel you so bad. i was in lots of solavellan spaces before i started shipping dreadrook, and even then i was looked at SO funny for my takes on the romance and called plenty of terrible things simply because i didn't hold solas up on this pedestal and make my lav worship the ground he walked on. even as a dreadrooker, the same exact takes that i couldn't get behind in solav spaces are very prevalent in dreadrook spaces. solasmancers have a tendency to simply agree with solas on everything and refuse to acknowledge how bad of a person he really can be.

i am a proud solasmancer AND a proud solas hater. #1 solas hater, in fact. i rarely have positive things to say about his actions and behaviors outside of a joke setting, and even in a joke setting the things people will say to defend him RUB ME SO BADLY THE WRONG WAY. also heavy on the perusing the "critical" tags and getting offended when my takes are, in fact, critical LMFAO. anon i am literally a beggar sitting on the side of the street waving a metal cup at you asking for coins of your affection rn. i have maybe one other friend who feels like this and have hardly anyone to rant about these things with. holding my hands out towards you and begging you to dm me fr. PLEASE. we can be critical together <3

[alilobsessive]

I have probably sent you an ask before about this but idk I NEED someone to make something from this idea:

Neglected!Wayne as Bob Belcher inspired

The early season crashouts, the struggling to pay the bills….it’s glorious

OR OR for a more like ‘different’ au:

Bruce Wayne falls in love with a struggling single parent with three kids, a burger shop that SHOULD be renowned worldwide, and a shitload of debt

🎤

Omg omg, okay, so I admittedly never watched Bob’s burgers I have seen clips, obviously. So I can’t in good conscience write this. I will never be able to do it justice, not until I binge watch at least a season or two or more, maybe the movie. But you’re definitely on to something.

If we’re going for option A

Neglected Wayne is probably about the same age as Dick, maybe older. None of there kids are that old 6 at the oldest. There desperately trying to keep the Restaurant going, this has been there dream since they were young! Not the running a Burger Place part but running a Restaurant, beggars can’t be choosers and you picked a Burger Place solely to spite the chain restaurants and Batburger’s that keep popping up. They desperately don’t want to contact there family for financial help. There relationship with them is awful and Reader would rather die then contact them. But one night during an attempted robbery at the restaurant all of that changes. You’re back on Bats radar, not just you but your whole family and that is not a good thing.

B though, I think it would be hilarious to see Bruce is kid and the medias reaction to him falling in love with this stressed and sarcastic single parent. Like

Reader: *Drenched in sweat, eye bags under eye bags, makeup? Don’t know her. Trying to stuff one of there kids into a hamburger costume in some big to gain more visitors or the restaurant will close for the 5th time. Another one is trying to blackmail and guilt trip a customer into tipping extra. The oldest is aggressively typing away at there phone writing 100 wpm, creating what can only be described as a 2010 pre-teen fanfiction. That in realty is mid at best but looks like high art to her.*

Bruce Wayne: *pining aggressively*

Bat kids: Really? You have women that could become supermodels if they wanted at your beck and call. Man that could revile gods swooning like teenager girl when you just glance at them? And you want that? That’s why to normal for you are you feeling okay?

The Media: Really? You have women that could become supermodels if they wanted at your beck and call. Man that could revile gods swooning like teenager girl when you just glance at them? And you want that?

Maybe instead of Bruce coming over as well Bruce Wayne it’s as Batman.

Picture this, your a single parent running a family owned Burger place in Gotham City. It’s a miracle you aren’t secretly a front for something. One of your kids is at the cash register, the other two doing homework, it almost completely empty. Then suddenly you hear it “HOLY SHIT!” One of them screams as the bell jingles signaling another customer. Instantly you’re on edge unsure of its a bad holy shit or a good one then they continue “ITS FUCKING BATMAN!” And instantly there’s a stampede if tiny footsteps. You look out of the kitchen and see your kids crowding around Batman who is still at the door. “What are you doing here?!” “Why are you here” “Baba didn’t commit any crimes did they??” “Baba’s not cool enough to commit crimes idiot!” “When did Baba get cool!” You’re youngest snaps her head to look at you. “You committed crimes and didn’t include me!?” She says both shocked and offended, Batman, the Dark Knight, someone who was nothing more then a cryptid when you and your Ex Partner first started this business, slowly turns his head to look at you. You feel nothing but fear, a primal fear you thought was long forgotten as you make eye contact.

Without a word he orders enough food for a small army, making sense judging by the amount of protégés and coworkers he has. He then pays solely in hundred dollar bills, leaves a hundred dollar tip and then disappears into the dead of night not taking his change. To your horror and your kids glee not just the Batman but his entire posse become regulars.

We’re cooking! We’re cooking here!

And remember kids! Always support your local businesses! Steeling from large companies is not a crime! And if you’ve never been to a Burger place before that isn’t fast food, go to one ASAP it will change your life a swear!

[tani-b-art]

there’s always that one person. that somebody. that someone who has had the most influence on helping to shape who you are. crystal is ava’s.

when ava responded with, “of course” after crystal told her “thank you, for what you did in there” and following when crystal said, “i appreciate it…” both of those reactions from ava were out of surprise and humility. she wasn’t expecting her to say any of that but you can see how much ava was so happy to hear it. elicited some real unsuspected mushiness from her and it looked like when a child is proud they gained their patent’s approval for a good thing they did. very meek in the cutest of ways. soft ava — the fact that crystal can still touch that special spot in ava even with them not being on good terms tells a lot, too. the fact that ava told her, “of course”…saying that tells that despite their not so good place, she still wanted to look out for her and it wasn’t a question. it’s almost as if she said you’re still my soror, you’re still my sister, you’re still my friend (i still remember how special you made me feel—on all levels of their friendship and/or relationship) and i wanted to help you and could, so i did. for ava’s immediate reaction to be so empathetic to hearing crystal in distress about not being successful in her bid for their funds—to me, that seems like she’s witnessed crystal in this position/state before (back in the day) and her instinct to so quickly recognize that coming from her…it was all still in her memory bank and ava was there then and now to be the calm to her storm and to find someway to fix whatever it was that has crystal anxious. it feels like a lot of ava’s reaction to crystal was from recalling and recognizing old times. ava didn’t mind putting the long-standing rivalry between them went on temporary pause so she can be there for her. even with their beef, ava keeps that special place for crystal open just a little.

(come to think of it, ava may get a surprise visit from crystal at abbott with the purposes to ask for her forgiveness. that lingering conversation will finally be had. they’ll talk it out, crystal will admit she did ava wrong, ava will accept her forgiveness and that’ll be the closure they, mostly ava, need(s))

if we’re never told about her & crystal’s backstory during their college/sorority days, i think we all can very much piece everything together without an actual episode. there’s so much explained in their few but extremely pivotal interactions — and we clearly see just how affected ava still is to this day with crystal. it appears as though the one person ava has gotten close to by choice (not familial) or allowed herself to be open to really damaged her in a formative period in her life and that person was crystal. and crystal betrayed her. their connection was good in the beginning and then turned not good at all. maybe it wasn’t crystal’s intention to hurt ava (idk why but in my deciphering of them, i believe crystal’s whole purpose of befriending ava initially was based in something that was contrived but along the way, crystal actually started to like ava, not just on a friend level either, and then it turned ugly when their situation got “exposed” to their sorority and crystal decided to keep her reputation intact and save face)…i’m still debating on if any of their falling out was intentional on that account or not. but however it played out, crystal’s actions definitely hurt ava and created this persona in ava. the emotionally impenetrable person she is. but, it’s obvious how that glass of protection she formed for self is slowly being built down because of people like janine and o’shon who aren’t crystal. both of them (especially janine; tbh, I would also add iggy because they have a relationship that seems just as impactful but probably was right after crystal—not sure on the timeframe yet but it seems like he came into her life at an aligning time) are helping her realize that she won’t need that protective glass anymore whenever she shares intimate moments with them…the image that comes to mind with ava and her glass of protection is the enchanted rose inside of the glass dome. she’s the rose that placed herself inside of it out of self-protection. it’s still a glass but it doesn’t have the purpose of running out of time (like the fairytale) so she has time to see everyone for who they really are. all the new people in her life (janine, o’shon) that show her any signs of like and love have been treating her that way in genuine kindness and in sincere care and it’s safe. and because it’s safe and considerate and w/o malice, she can dismount the dome that’s been shielding her and let herself experience those beautiful acts from the people who care for her. there’s honesty in their feelings towards her. so that glass dome, it served its purpose. she can reveal herself from underneath it.

we’ve gotten lots of soft, delicate and vulnerable Ava this season. she feels very safe with the people she’s allowed to see this side of her which shows how much she feels protected to let down her walls and unmasks herself around them. she obviously isn’t able to allow this often because her reactions to folks being kind, patient and gentle with her proves how foreign it is—it’s an act of love she isn’t too familiar with because she’s not gotten it very often. probably only from her grandmother so it coming from non-family seems jarring to her but y’all know she absolutely loves it! so seeing her let it happen and momentarily receive it to let her soft come forth is…soft.

it’s soft and still very powerful too. and it’s beautiful because it’s brave and graceful. i would even say her timidity is beautiful, brave and graceful just as well. so sweet. so kind. all very attractive.

Ava is allowing Ava!

(a lot of this soft Ava awakening is in large part to Janine)