#and to my high school physics teacher
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I feel as though the brilliance of academia is sometimes discounted a little too heavily, especially in the current part of the artistic world which I inhabit. I speak about physics and apply it to my technique or repertory, and thus I am accused of distilling or over-analysing my work. Is my personal practice and artistry not meant to be understandable, even by myself, even though it is my body, mind, and soul partaking in it most intimately? Well, that I do not understand. I use the vocabulary that I have, in the ever-limiting nature of language, and I am told that it is wrong. Please direct me to the correct terminology that makes you feel it how my words make me feel it. To me, universal gravitation is fucking wondrous. An object can be so large that simply existing near another object means that that other object will be pulled into it, orbit it, exist as close to it as it can without being crushed or burned or absorbed. Is that not beautiful? Is that not poetic? You take up so much space that I can't help but be drawn into you. Let me into your life. Help me understand you as closely as I can while still existing in my own miraculous right. The earth orbits the sun. Your warmth, everywhere it touches me, keeps the most microscopic parts of me alive, breathing, growing, changing. Stoichiometry is the balancing of chemical equations. A chemical compound reacts with oxygen and combusts into something different. Every time I inhale, I am irrevocably changed. It’s not always complete. It doesn’t have to be for it to still be incredibly effective. I am so full that my existence constantly alters the atmosphere for my entire life. Is that not incredible? Is the fact that my every heave of my chest changes the world too apathetic for you? Or is it again just the devastating flaw and failure of our inherently human nature to use language, irrationally uncountable expanding-and-deflating dialects of direct and indirect synonym and translation across oceans and generations and histories and lives? Is that why my ‘plus-equals-therefore’ can also mean ‘co-existence is the most incredible coincidence’ to me, but to you it can only mean that I am unreachable? Did I not just tell you that we are always reaching for each other?
#physics#chemistry#an imperfect understanding of both but still#thoughts#a love letter to existence as a whole#and to my high school physics teacher#art student brainrot#i wrote this instead of sleeping
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if you're too tired to write physics notes at midnight after writing chem notes for six hours straight. may i suggest making everything satosugu
#satosugu#these are not the most organized and well formatted notes ive ever made. however i can still understand them so whatever#cant go wrong with including your blorbos into all your academic pursuits right#'soro werent you supposed to learn this in high school physics' well you see. i was asleep. for all of high school physics#not that i had a bad teacher he was my favorite teacher i just had a cripplingly bad sleep schedule#jjk#this is a shitpost im not adding visibility tags#@ any high schoolers reading this. do your goddamn homework before 8 pm#do your studying before then too. like actual studying not 5 min of flashcards#dont be like me and sleep from the time i got home (3pm) to 8 pm and do hw for one hour and then sleep again until 11 pm#and then stay up from 11-4am and then sleep again from 4-6am and then go to school#seriously. not smart. not cool. not quirky. big stupid
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these exams are killing me man and they haven't even started yet.
#petrichor's thoughts#petrichor rambles#petri vents#petri 🦠#mental health#burnout#school#tw anxiety#severe anxiety#think about how stressed you get about exams and then multiply thst by like 1000000000000000000#thats how badly stressed i get#my insomnia gets so much worse as well#and i just kind of shut down#everyone tells me itll be fine and ill get good grades#and then my friends who get lower grades compare themselves to me#and its like#my grades are only high because ive stressed so much and revised to the point where i physically cant anymore#i had to teach myself how to remember things better because otherwise if my motivation levels get lower im basically fvcked#also why tf would you compare yourself to me#you know who you are#its not fair just because my grades are high#you dont know how hard i worked to get here#and how difficult it was#and how i suffer every day because of it#i cant with school anymore man#the people and the stress and the teachers and the everything is just too much
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✦ 14. 5. 24 ✦ 📓 ✦ Tuesday ✦ Day 34/60 ✦
(longer (personal) diary post)
✓ school - math homework, philosophy homework, physics lab spreadsheet, physics 'homework' ✓ art - page in my sketchbook
🌱🌿🪴 - 2h 53min on Forest ♫₊˚.🎧 ▷▷ Męskie Granie 2023 (Album)
The physics homework in question was not really physics, we had to read/ listen to the "This is water" speech. And I find that to be very refreshing and it shows that the teacher actually cares about teaching us not only strictly physics. It was basically about main character syndrome. Idk I resonated with it. But I have been doing that (choosing what to think) since I was 10, so...
I legitimately have so much to do. I basically have no free time :/ And I can add an "in depth" geo presentation into my plan now. I will complain on here because it´s the only place I can do that.
But I somehow enjoy it. There is a positive aspect to it. I feel very, uhm, challenged? I rationally know that I will do great, so I enjoy the process? It`s like sisyphus, BUT I know the stone will stay on top at the end. Wait that just takes away the whole point of the myth. Anyway.
I feel so incredibly comfortable at school. It`s been a safe space lately. My friend group has changed a lot, but now I finally feel content. And the current workload is an additional way of escapism :) Facing my problems? Nah, let´s study :))
Now I really need to sleep, goodnight to everyone who decided to read me ranting on the internet!
Have a great day/night !! ~ ♦️
#oversharing on the internet?? My favorite flavour of sleep deprivation#another case of men discovering what teenage girls have been thinking about since they`re 10#for legal reasons this is a joke#love you physics teacher <3#studyblr#study blog#studying#student life#study motivation#study notes#study inspo#high school studyblr#study aesthetic#study inspiration#nodalchallenge#karoriginal#karodiaries
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fucked up dreams 2 nights in a row ✌️
#ok dream oversharing time pls look away#had a high school dream and my sister was there though she's 20 years older than me#the teacher was handing out reading assignments and someone else got the carnivorous lamb and i didnt#and i had to beg to switch books in front of the class and my sister was like why do you want that book so much#and she flipped to a random page and started reading it to my mom who was also there for some reason#and it was the fuckling butterfly scene and basically my soul left my body in horror#“it's a METAPHOR about fascist spain... the YELLow the RED it's SYMBOLS” 😰#anyway the night before i dreamt noel was my big brother and also there was piss but not even in a sexy way smh jdgsfsjjs#i was also humiliated in a high school classroom... this whole reunion business is really talking a toll lmao#noel dragged me into trouble with a rival gang and the law i was physically injured and humiliated in front of everyone also i was like 12#but then he stood up for me and had my back... dream noel you are so kind <3
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if i were a british rockstar dude from the 1960s id be your favorite right
#if i wouldnt then we're not friends#text post#id kick mick jagger's ass. not brian jones' and not dave davies'. maybe ray davies#not lyrically but like physically i would kick his ass#i would get in a scrap or two if i were one of those guys#actually i thought about it a lot a year ago when i was rereading my middle/early high school diaries i was like#if i had been raised a boy i would've been getting into physical fights. i had so many issues#and i hated everyone around me.#young boys see violence as an option more readily than girls do.#if a freckled curly-haired girly thing like me ever decked someone i'd never be accepted by anyone ever again#as a teacher i do see the ways that girls are encouraged to be more socially aggressive versus w boys it's more often physical/overt#but i also wasnt very socially aggressive bc i had too much anxiety to speak to ppl. anyway i say this as a good thing!#good thing i never got into any fights#anyway if i were a british rockstar dude from the 1960s id be your favorite riiiiiight?
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adhd vs autism
#this is actually a wip of my high school au where theyre both physics TAs and probably run junior engineers/robotics team or something#jayce wants to ban ekko and jinx from the extracurriculars for well. blowing up the lab. and.#playing pranks and causing mayhem (mostly jinx)#viktor refuses to risk them losing academic opportunities just for being kids and acting out a little and tells jayce he won't back him up#idk why but im rly into this conflict between a viktor who wants to see these under-served kids succeed and a jayce who feels inferior#because he can't connect with these students and develop a mutual respect w them#heimerdinger is the teacher they both work for but in typical fashion he isnt doing jack abt the situation#jinx gets like 4 vapes taken away a week where is she even getting them.#vi and cait have an elite 'crazy white girl who fights ppl' and 'girl who would tell on u for having weed' enemies to girlfriends arc#uhh what else#cait is in colorguard and student council and plays the violin#vi got kicked out of wrestling for biting ppl#sevika is a school security officer who wonders if jinx and vi were sent to personally stress her out#vi bc of constant fighting and jinx because of#everything
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Small and low quality Mizuchi ft smol baby Yato
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It's been a while. I miss these posts :(
#noragami#mizuchi#yato#Noragami spoilers#i'm thinking of coming back to this blog#like posting frequently like i used to#not everyday but hopefully at least once a week#life has been so hectic#firstly i think last year i lost commitment for this blog cuz i was hyperfixating on a visual novel series#and that series literally took my attention away from everything i swear l#and then this year happened oh dear lord school is beating me to a pulp every damn week#started at a new school in november & it took me long to make friends#and on top of that most of my classes are ultra boring and the teachers pile on work like crazy#i have to push myself so hard and burn out at the end of every week to get every assignment turned in#only got a month left of school so yea but also nay cuz there's sm left to do#got a damn eoc exam tomorrow and then a physics exam the next day#i have a performance for my asl class which im so not prepared for in a few weeks#and then finals like the week after the performance i think?#oh and my algebra teacher said she's giving us another exam before the final#very fun!! i love being a high schooler XD
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my macroeconomics teacher tried to teach us about foreign exchange/currency appreciating and depreciating by comparing it to a scenario where a boy plays two girls and can't feasibly give both the same amount of attention at the same time so one currency "appreciates" while the other currency "depreciates."
even better was when some kid in my class just ran with the metaphor and was like "it's physically impossible to appreciate both at the same time" and our teacher went into an awkward silence when he heard the word physical lmao because he thought the kid was alluding to something else
#the funny thing is he's one of those sweet teen boys and not the annoying ones so he genuinely wasn't trying to make a sex joke aldjfkfjfh#then my macro teacher started talking about some dude trying to beat him up in high school and how he pinned the kid to the ground and fed#him grass because he didn't want to physically hurt him aldjfkrbfkrfk#white male teachers always tell the weirdest stories#they'll derail a class for 10 full minutes with random jokes
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sometimes i think about per studying to be an electrician and i smile
#in high school though (?)#which is crazy to me#like im thinking about the physics class labs where we got out the batteries and the alligator clip wires and stuff#my high school physics teacher was kind of not normal though he was always letting us drop things down the stairwell or whatever
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Juno, respectfully, what the fuck is up with your bio teacher
to be completely honest with you i don't actually know hdsjhjkd
sometimes he can almost pass as a relatively normal science teacher but then he just does SOMETHING that reminds you of why he's the little freak of the science department (affectionate)
i do love having him though hjdshjk he bought all of us hot chocolates from the upper school cafe for christmas. he also chats w one of the people in my class about the witcher. and puts minecraft music on to help us relax (he has a gamer chair. he showed us photos of it bc he was so happy when he got it)
#we're having tours from primary schools rn that are tryna get the y6s to come to my school next year#and a buncha teachers are doin tours for it. and when he was asked why he wasnt he said that he was told he was “responsible enough” to do#-tour#i mean. there's also my gcse physics teacher..who was definitely wild as hell. and didnt actually teach us? (still got that A* tho)#and my y7 comp science teacher! he got fired for comin into school high#yk what. maybe its just a my school problem#asks#anon
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Saw King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard live and the show was the coolest sexiest thing a group of random Australian dudes can do on a Wednesday afternoon. The Great Chain of Being is a delicious song and I’m obsessed.
#king gizzard and the lizard wizard#groughts#also ran into my high school’s physics teacher there which was kind of funny#kgatlw
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found out I got a 95 on my linear algebra exam today, genuinely thought I was gonna get around a 70 and an 80 if I was lucky 🧍♂️ I fr BSed my way through the entire thing (started doing the notes for the entire unit the morning of the exam bc I’m insane and I want to see if my body can take it (Markiplier reference) anyway never doing that again 💀 (I in fact, probably will be doing that again))
#life update#linear algebra#why is that a tag#I’m in a toxic relationship with math#linear algebra is one of those classes that makes me feel like im too dumb to be a stem major#physics too when I took it in high school I only got a 2 on my AP exam#granted my teacher did flipped classroom and that teaching style so did not work for me I’m a hands on girly#i literally only learn through fuck around and find out aka doing it wrong in every way possible until I get it right#anyway I managed to get an A in modern mechanics freshmen year of college which is a miracle imo#bc physics is hard and at that time I was still classified as a BFA major so none of the study sessions and tutoring stuff fit my schedule#bc studio and stuff#anyway cry lore drop
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is he AWARE that he scares people? if so, does it upset him?
Oh he is very awfully PAINFULLY aware that people are scared of him. He HATES it more than anything. Some people don’t even want to get to know him because of the creepy vibes he gives off, a “better safe than sorry” sort of thing. People tend to stare or watch him, and that really upsets him (being the center of negative attention freaks him out bad)
He WANTS to get along with people, he WANTS to have conversations, he WANTS to have relationships, but so many people won’t give him a chance
The worst part about is people are scared of something he can’t change! His body! He’s always gonna be an off putting looking fellow and it breaks his heart! He just wants more people to be OKAY with him!
#ask#about my ocs#he’s a high school teacher which is a fun lil situation he’s is. cause teachers usually aren’t tryna freak out their students first day#he teaches the higher grades tho as a physics teacher. so most of em have seen him around at that point#and David has seen him around before dating him too. so he wasn’t really turned off by him#I should draw out how he appears to people more. cus him being a cutsie happy boy is a close people only thing#he really does take after Nisha in terms of (face that throws a people off)#the only difference is Nisha is scary cus she can beat your ass#and ass is scary cus he’s like fuckin slender man with a face
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Ars Paradoxica school au but it's a high school where all the kids are obsessed with the drama in the science and maths block.
I have a rough outline for the first two arcs of the plot but don't know where to go from there.
Mr Partridge is the head of Maths, Mr Barlowe also works there too and both their wives are quite involved with the school for various reasons ( I haven't decided whether I actually want them working there or not yet).
Dr Grissom showed up and got immediately promoted to head of science, the rumours as to how vary between her bribing the headteacher or being a time traveling scientist with knowledge far ahead of the current time. Or maybye she's just good at her job.
Mr Wyatt works there too along side Ms Roberts, who's happy to finally be able to teach instead of constantly being on supply duty.
The school ends up getting shut down when some government guy shows up and one of the Chemistry teachers commits arson.
#if one person want to know about my ideas for point of exile ill tell#ive never really done an au before so idk what im doing help#please say if theres anything i got wrong or something#didnt mention but the school is seriously undercunded and doenst have an onsite tech team so when a bunch if the computers glich out late#after school Anthony and Sally bond over fixing them and complaining about the head and deputy#sally grissom#ars pardoxia#ars paradoxica#anthony partridge#Esther Roberts#Jack Wyatt#also now im just imaging within the boock itself all the stuff is happeneding with the maths a physics teachers with some chem kinda involv#d and the bio teachers are just like nope not paid enough for this#be kinda funny if there was still timetravel and spy stuff was still happening#this is all just from the childrens pov#omg im rambelling#au#ars paradoxica au#high school au#high school teacher au#idk lol#rare non queued post
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i shouldve studied something else i should’ve done stem
#GUUUUUYYYSSSUUAUAUUUHGGAHUHGHH#i am so so so dumb and stupid truly i can feel like brain smoothing as the seconds pass#i feel like i’m gonna die someday and they’re gonna take my brain out and it’s gonna look like a bowling ball bc of how smooth it is AUUAUGH#yesterday a girl at this party asked me what my major was and i said gd and she was like ‘do you love it?!’ and i just 😃☝🏼🧍🧍🧍🧍🧍#GGAAAAHHWHHHHUHHHHHUH I DOOO I LOVE IT I THINK BUT IM SO SCAAARREDD I FEEL LIKE IM BAADDDDDD AND IT MAKES ME THINK I DONT LIKE IT TTTT#I DONT LIKE BEING BAAADDDUUUHAHGHGHIHGH HOW HARD CAN IT BE.#AND I LOVE SCIENCE SO MUCUUUUCH BUT MY BRAIN HAS SMOOTHED BEYOND REPAIR I KNWO I WOULD BE BAD#BUT IF I STARTED OUT DOING IT MAYBE I WOULDNT BE SO BAD. AUUGGHH#maybe my smooth brain would not be so smooth. god. i love science#i loved biology i loved oceanography i LOOOVE CHEMISTRY AUUGH#and if covid don’t happen i would’ve taken physics and probably hated it but maybe i wouldn’t and maybe i would like astrophysics#and maybe i would go to space. covid ruined my chances of going to space and turning my brain smooth#whatever whatever whatever i like being an artist it’s fine i love being a graphic designer i love being an illustrator i love it#it would just be very very nice if i didn’t feel dumber than everyone around me all the time when having conversations#and it would be nice to not be. so so scared of my job all the time#whatever whatever#sorry#🌙.txt#i love science#my high school chemistry teacher also redacted after i graduated an do liked him a lot so that makes me miss chemistry even more. WHATEVER#sorry i’m done
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