#and to be fair the fake rule in my brain is also that i would be way too tempted to add carrie kelley into it.
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i always wanna do silly stuff with all the robins but every time i want to i feel like i would have to include Absolutely Every Robin Ever so they all get a little spotlight even if people only give a shit about 4 of those robins thats what a majority of fanart generally is to begin with but i would feel bad if i dont include that robin that appeared for a single frame in an elseworld comic or something
#if lance bruner does not get an honorable mention something bad will happen to me !!!!#i think this is the one topic that people would not be like ''op u forgot this guy'' about#since again most fanstuff is just the 4 robins usually skipping steph#but alas the ''op u forgot this guy'' is in my head. i am the ''op u forgot this guy''. stares in mirror sees evil reflection#and to be fair the fake rule in my brain is also that i would be way too tempted to add carrie kelley into it.#if u add carrie kelley then that means u gotta add everybody its only fair i love her but she cant be the exception. in my head#i think at most ppl would be like ''op that one doesnt count'' honestly lol#by the way im doing all these mental gymnastics because i thought it would be funny to animate ROBIN CARAMELLDANSEN. YEAH. OO OO OA OA.
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So I watched the Minimoni video just now, and 2 things:
1. I am sad that Namjoon prefers MUSE over Face. Mostly because imo Face is more interesting in concept, execution and lyrics. Oh well. Personal preference.
2. The concept for MUSE is, if I understood correctly, that all the emotions of happiness and excitement JM feels are somewhat temporary. Like a crush that just goes nowhere, it's built more on how your brain romanticises a person and less on who that person actually is. We get crushes on people based on a few minutes of interactions, but at some point that feeling fades. And to Jimin, that's kinda what his entire life feels like. As a GenZ (98), I relate soooooo hard to that. There's these moments of elation, when you do something fun, but soon enough real life kinda drags you down again. The future isn't that exciting to look at and hope kinda flies out the window. To be fair, for most of my generation that's based a lot in feelings of economic fear - sth Jimin doesn't experience- but I think he experiences a lot of other emotions that equate to sth similar. Especially since SK, like many other countries tbh, kind of seems to not take enough steps forward socially to combat all the issues created by the ruling classes of the last decades (aka Baepsae). Anyway.
These feelings of good moments and happiness being fleeting doesn't mean the moments or emotions in that moment were faked. But since it comes and goes, and the lows tend to get very low (also mental illness is a big part that doesn't get mentioned directly in MMM though Jimin has touched on it before), you tend to catastrophise a lot. It's like imposter syndrome for feelings of happiness.
As a separate closing thought: a lot has been made about Who as a song and how you'd fit it into Jikook. Or how it disproves Jimin being in a happy potentially queer relationship, but imo the MMM really highlights how the whole love and crush narrative of MUSE is just a big metaphor. It's not even about JK specifically, but I think it would do Jimin a huge disservice to assume that this album he has worked on for over a year just contains very surface level songs. Yeah, they are about love and yearning, but just like "Fake Love" or any song on the Love Yourself trilogy are about loving someone else on the surface, it essentially is an album about self-reflection. It can be both. Similarly, I find it insulting of people that they assume the "she" was forced on Jimin because he isn't in the credits of the song. As if they wouldn't have re-written the whole thing if it didn't fit Jimin's vision. Don't infantilize him just because it doesn't fit with our (yes, I'm a shipper) view of who Jimin loves.
"She" is a concept, a dream and not real. In that sense, "she" reminds me of Marlena - a female stand-in for inspiration and music as used by the Italian band Maneskin. But that's a reach. And I don't want to discount the literal layer of the song either. I personally don't believe Who is this big red stamp of "hey, I'm here, I'm not queer and looking for a woman to love, please call hit me up" others see it as. But that doesn't mean that it doesn't actually reflect how much Jimin is yearning for someone to love him how he wants to be loved.
I think Jikook is real because of how they behave around each other, and from how they talk about each other. Even the latest mention in MMM, how they (and Yoongi, poor 3rd wheel) spend hours talking about music and singing screams "and they spend the rest of their lives living together, historians call them very good friends" to me. But I won't be upset if it turns out, they did have relationships for years with other people. I won't make up theories and stories to invalidate whoever they end up spending the rest of their life with - we're not larries. Even if I find GCF Tokyo and Saipan, Rosebowl, the regular carrying and the 7000 other instances very hard to contextualise in a hetero way.
Sorry for the essay but I was kind of getting sick of all the sides currently out and about, both the antis and shippers need to chill out.
I really enjoyed reading your thoughts so thank you for sharing!
see I think for jimin muse as an album perhaps was more about his journey going through creating it, it was a labour of love and something he made from scratch with a team of people. it was probably a real challenge too and it seems like he went through a lot of growth creating this album. I think it's quite hard to judge the 'real' meaning of songs to jimin and everyone having their opinions is valid but as you said we would all do well chilling out😂for me this time it almost seems like the 'concepts' behind the songs are not as deep as maybe face was but the entire process of creating muse was more meaningful to jimin.
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Mashle: Magic and Muscle Season 1 Re-Cap + Season 2 - Episode 1
Other Episodes-> ep2 ep3 ep4 ep5
This anime shits all over JKR in the best way possible. Highly Recommended if you can make it through the 2nd half of Season 1.
Overall Rating So Far: 8/10 with hopes it will stay there.
For comparison, season 1 ended up 6/10. TToTT as to why...
I'm writing this while re-watching season one, and maaaaan what a strong start Season 1 had!! 9/10 for the first 4 episodes!!
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How is this avoiding copyright? I don't know but I fully support it.
I LOVE MASH AND HIS REALISTIC TAKES.
The pacing got completely thrown off after episode 5. Did we really need those fight to be THAT long and drawn out?? No. I get that animation studios are limited in how far into the manga they can go in a given season, but I would have preferred anime original filler over 2 episodes of metal punch dude, and the whole "chamber of secrets" esque episodes...
Despite being sorely disappointed by the second half of season 1, I did finish it. Starting episode 1 of Season 2, I completely forgot where the last episode had left off and it hasn't even been that long!! I had to laugh at just how much my brain had tuned out by the end, which is sad, because this is such an amazing premise.
HOWEVER
SEASON 2 EPISODE 1 BROUGHT BACK THE DRIVE TO WATCH!!
The first episode of season 2 doubles down on poking ALL sorts of holes in the plot of Harry Potter and sidestepping any massive overlaps to avoid copyright. BUT IT'S SO OBVIOUS, I LOVE IT.
May I introduce you to...
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"Harry Potter with just enough serial numbers filed off to avoid a lawsuit." - Capybara
Spoilers for Episode 1 Below the Cut
We started off with a small recap of the end of season 1 and honestly I don't remember most of it happening.
Woo they beat the Tom Riddle/Abel Walker, Woo they won tons of points for their dormitory, Woo Mash's super special "magic spell" the Suplex!!!
But oh no! There is a rumor that Mash can't use magic has gotten out! To be fair, it was only a matter of time. Bicep Smash Magic can only get you so far lolol.
The little celebration party is very cute, and suddenly Abel and Abyss show up, and Mash is just totally chill with them joining in their party. Abel even brought a deck of cards and they're playing bullshit of all games lmfao
Personally I want to know why Dot has his mouth and face all bandaged up, but I assume that's Lemon's doing for some reason or another lol
Let me just say, I love Abel and Abyss. Abel is terrifying and carrying around his creepy doll and freaking Finn out, and literally just wants to have fun with everyone. He's far more incompetent, or maybe just normal? than he seems. And cares about Abyss!! And Abyss is doing his best to take care of his master, and thanks Mash for stopping them both. And can't talk to women!!
We love a traumatized bishonen.
Mash gets called to the Bureau of Magic and basically gets called a Mudblood to his face for not having magic and is being sentenced to death.
AND DRACO MALFOY SHOWS UP TO SAVE HIM.
You cannot dissuade me that this isn't another Draco.
And of course, to counter Draco/Ryoh Grantz, we get Knock Off Harry Potter and gang!
Neville with a dragon? Snow girl is Luna? The one with the book is Hermione? Obviously these are also original characters and there is no one to one with characters, but it's fun to try and place them.
Fake Harry Potter / Orter Madel says the most Not Harry Potter thing ever, and its hilarious that a character known for going against the rules has a caricature doing exactly the opposite.
Fuckin' mood Mash. Where the hell did RON come from??? ah.. his only purpose is to narrate what's happening. Makes sense.
The magi-parasite shows up, mob deals with, and it should be a done deal, but Orter continues to push the issue as Ryoh tries to stop him.
Will Mash be taken away and executed? He's not budging. Will Draco and Harry fight? What will become of Mash now that Dumbledore and Finn's Big Bro have shown up?
Until Next Time..
What the fuck is this show I love it so much.
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Is Shawn gay for real? People joke about it all the time but I am serious. Before Camila, he never had a public gf and Hailey does not count that was not a real couple- more like situationship or hook up.
Apparently he used to date his prom date Lauren but I dont know if there is proof of that. He tweeted he used to have a secret gf in like 2017 for two years which could be a lie. Every other singer flaunts their gf or bf but he gives bearded vibes ngl. We know every male pop star women they claim and they are affectionate publicly to them.
That photo of Shawn from last summer with his guy friends who were all obviously girly pop is so funny. A straight man can be friends with a gay guy but that many of them...kinda sus
I heard some rumours so take it with a grain of salt, but I heard Shawn dad is homophobic...
bruh. Bruh. Shawn has BEGGED people not to discuss this so this discussion will genuinely be my 13th reason. He says it makes him uncomfy, that it makes him super self-conscious, and that as far as he knows he’s not gay lol (tho he’s also not homophobic and *is* an ally but some of his denials come off somewhat homophobic but ALSO just LEAVE HIM ALONE that’s all he’s asked for and then he wouldn’t have to issue weird sounding denials). Who KNOWS lol? Maybe Shawn himself doesn’t. But it’s super weird to speculate about something that personal when a person LITERALLY BEGS FANS not to. When a celeb - or fwiw a person you know - says “I am asking people very nicely not to discuss my sexuality” and you keep doing it that’s super messed up.
Now people who are soft closeted - like Richard Madden lol where super legitimate publications put “roommate” in inverted commas because he doesn’t want to publicly come out but he’s also not exactly doing anything to hide it - are fair game lol we can all have a chuckle about that. (Not at Richard so much but at people who don’t buy that he’s yk not straight even though he’s doing bugger all to hide it beyond saying “I’m not gonna publicly come out because it’s not your business” essentially like obvi everyone who knows Richard irl knows his “roommate” is his bf and anyone with two brain cells knows whichever flavor of the year it is is in fact his bf). When celebs signal before they publicly come out or just like to hint they’re open to it, also fair enough (like Rihanna has never said “I’m bi” but she’s made enough comments that obviously she’s at least somewhat into women). But if someone explicitly says “this makes me extremely uncomfortable, KINDLY stop doing this” idk why anyone would feel the need to keep going??
This is also my issue with even the softest Gaylors atp - she’s asked people to stop??? She says it makes her feel weird??? She hasn’t said it makes her feel as weird as Shawn said it made him feel but she’s also asked to like shut it down???? Which part’s not clicking???
Finally re public gfs idk lots of people in the public eye don’t want to date super publicly - some for sexuality reasons for sure, some because they tend to date more normies, some because like idk about y’all but I don’t hard launch every fucking thing I’m involved in so why would celebs? It’s imo sorta weird to go “well this person doesn’t post a bunch of flings on Insta and they don’t take dates to celeb hotspots and don’t date people as famous as them necessarily so ergo they don’t date anyone” yk? (Not saying that’s what you said because you did say PUBLIC gf but like my point is public is irrelevant bc we don’t know who they’re seeing outside of the sliver of their life that we are privy to).
Anyway, my personal rules are if a person says they don’t like that conversation, stop having it. Also don’t accuse people of queerbaiting because real people genuinely can’t lol? That’s a term created for shows and films and books that tease it to keep a gay audience with no intention of writing it into the plot. Don’t accuse people of being fake gay either because MANY OF US experiment and aren’t quite sure of exact labels and that’s okay too. Normalize just saying like… people are people and celebs are people. If labels make them happy, dope. Trust that they know that whichever one they’re using rn fits them best in their own head or at least is the best one for them to say out loud. Also remember that you’re allowed to change your labels. You’re allowed to experiment and try shit out on all sides of the equation. You’re allowed to have a preference but pepper in some other stuff lol. Idk man just let people vibe.
Gossiping about celeb mess is fun lol but gossiping about something that personal like… being gay/queer LABEL WISE or “are they closeted???” isn’t mess it’s a super personal thing and idk man. Like if you wanna say lol - with some evidence - “I heard Shawn kissed a boy at this party he went to lol” I’d be like “lmaooo what happened” but that’s got fuck all to do with his label/speculation about his identity then - that’d just be a fun rumor about him doing something a bit wild. It’s the speculation on identity that I have a problem with? I’ll add the one thing I’m even more hectic about tho is fertility speculation because there’s NO WAY that can be a fun rumor. Also serious psychiatric diagnoses like if you say someone is on the spectrum or has a personality disorder idk why that’d be a fun rumor. Gossiping about mess = funny. Gossiping about real deep shit like… isn’t fun or funny to me and shouldn’t be to anyone with a tad of empathy.
Fyi that’s also my rule for real life gossip. Hilarious to hear like my friend got drunk and made out with a bunch of people and like snorted ❄️ off someone’s tits or w/e. Not hilarious to be like “did u hear that couple is going for IVF but it’s not working” yk??? Just have idk empathy.
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Don’t Catch Feelings
Can’t believe I’ve never written a fake dating au, it’s literally my favourite trope. This is also my longest fic at 2.7k, hope you enjoy !
Pairing: Doyoung X Y/N
Summary: It was a win-win situation right, fake date and get what you both want. Unless what you want was Kim Doyoung.
Y/L/N, let’s date.
How did you get in this situation? You didn’t know either.
The source of that sentence was standing right in front of you, looking as though he casually told you the sky was blue. Kim Doyoung, your biggest rival in your year, there was never a day where the both of you wouldn’t be arguing or fighting to answer questions in class. You hated him with all your heart, and you were sure that feeling was mutual.
And yet, what did he just say? Kim Doyoung wanted to date you? You must still be dreaming.
Getting annoyed at your lack of response, the said boy rolled his eyes and smirked.
“Hello? Did you finally kill your brain after trying so hard to beat me for chemistry? Anyway don’t be stupid, I definitely do not find you attractive. I meant fake date so we can both get what we want.”
“Huh..” Really wasn’t a good day for you.
“Wow what an intellectual response. Let me break it down for you.” He slowly emphasised each word as though he was talking to a child. “Look you’re not subtle, I know you have a crush on Lee Taeyong. While I’m trying to get Seomin back. Therefore we date in public and make ourselves look more attractive, and get who we want. Finally clicking Y/L/N?”
You involuntarily blushed. Lee Taeyong had been your crush for about a year now. There was something ethereal about the senior, besides the fact that he was insanely popular and had a heart of gold. However, being on the other end of the social hierarchy mean that Lee Taeyong had no idea of your existence. As must as it pained you, Doyoung was pretty popular and dating him would put you in the spotlight for once. As usual, he had come up with a logical plan, and you hated him even more.
“I don’t know how you’ve been stalking me to know that information Kim, but I have to say you’ve come up with a smart idea for once.” Doyoung scoffed at your response, and you ignored his rudeness. “However, for two people to date they must at least tolerate each other. How do you suppose we convince the school we somehow fell in love?”
“Well sweetheart, there’s always a fine line between love and hate remember.” You pretended not to notice the way your heart fluttered at the mocking nickname.
“We have to set rules. And be convincing. I will murder you if people find out this is fake.”
“Whatever you want Y/L/N, don’t worry I’ll be the best fake boyfriend you’ll ever get.”
You pulled out your notes app. “Okay first rule: No catching feelings. Feel any slight sense of genuine affection and this whole thing is off.”
“No shit Sherlock, of course we won’t. Second rule: we’ll end this only when both of us get who we want, I don’t trust that you won’t dump me once Taeyong so much as looks in your direction.”
“Fair enough, third rule: Physical affection is okay, provided there are people around. Kissing is fine but no make outs.” You turned red while mentioning this but it had to be said. You definitely weren’t super comfortable with physical touch, given the fact that you were never in a relationship before, but who would believe a couple who didn’t kiss in public these days.
“Wow Y/L/N getting daring I see. Okay my last rule: we hang out after school each day and at least once during the weekend. We need to see each other outside to really sell this thing.” More time with Doyoung, how perfect.
“Fine, I don’t have anymore rules too. Guess you’re my fake boyfriend now.” Just as you locked your phone, the empty classroom you two were talking in started to fill up. Doyoung side glanced at your classmates, picked up your hand and kissed it while staring right into your eyes.
“My pleasure sweetheart, meet me after school today.”
-
You both decided to go to a cafe a few blocks away. It was cute enough to be considered a date spot, but also near to school that many classmates frequented it. Perfect to let rumours fly.
Since this was technically your first date, you didn’t know quite what to do. Hoping it didn’t show, you clasped your fingers on the table and tried to make conversation.
“So, how was todays lessons Kim? You must have found it hard.” Sitting across from you, Doyoung frowned and leaned forward.
“Please Y/L/N, we already fight about academics in school, don’t tell me you want to talk about work even on our date. Word of advice, when you go on a date with Taeyong, don’t do this.” Embarrassed, you looked down to your lap, Doyoung definitely knows you’re a dating noob.
Soft hands grabbing yours made you look up. Your rival looked almost gentle as he said,
“Hey, don’t worry. I know it’s awkward to talk to me without arguing. Let’s just do what people do on first dates, try to get to know each other? I don’t think I know much about you except that you’re slightly dumber than me.” The last sentence got you scoffing, rolling your eyes playfully. Doyoung grinned, knowing you were back to your usual self.
“Well, then you don’t know anything about me. But I guess basic facts, I’m the oldest out of 4. My parents put a lot of pressure on me to do well because obviously, I’m the oldest. I don’t really do much else except study.” Sounds sad, but it was true. Besides studying and helping around the house or looking after your younger siblings, there wasn’t much time for you to try anything else.
Doyoung looked a bit shocked by your words, but he composed himself before replying, “No wonder you’re so uptight, you need to relax a bit Y/L/N. Anyway I’m Doyoung, I have an older brother, I’m in the school’s basketball team I love going to karaoke rooms.”
“Karaoke? Like singing?”
“Yes of course, don’t tell me you’ve never been?” At the lack of response, he clapped his hands, “Wells, this means date night for this weekend is settled. You have to try karaoke.”
The conversation flowed quite easy after that. Surprisingly, you two had a lot in common. Once the sun started to set, Doyoung stood up and held out his hand to you, offering to walk you back.
“See ya tomorrow Y/L/N.”
“Hey Doyoung?” His eyes widened. “Don’t you think you need to call me by my first name now. Usually people don’t call their girlfriends by their last name.” Doyoung smirked and gave you a peck on your cheek,
“Alright Y/N, have a good night.”
He turned around swiftly and walked off, leaving you standing at your door blushing furiously. You blamed this on having no prior romantic experience, but Doyoung sure was smooth.
-
Not before long, the whole school was buzzing over the new couple. Doyoung and you were seen holding hands all around the corridors, sitting together during classes and for once, helping each other with school work.
Of course, the underlying plan was working as well. While you were waiting for Doyoung at your locker, Taeyong actually walked past you and gave you a small wave, rendering you speechless. According to Doyoung, Seomin had been pestering his friends about your new relationship as well.
As for your actual ‘relationship’, you might be treading on dangerous ground soon. Doyoung was, surprisingly, a great boyfriend. He drove, so every morning without fail he would wait outside your house and also send you back after. He helped you carry you books when you walk from class to class, and he let you join his friends during lunch so that now you had an actual friend group.
Most importantly, he was kind when he wanted to, always lending a listening ear whenever you had frustrations. Doyoung had even visited your house a few times and got along really well with your siblings. He knew you didn’t have much of a social life, so he tried his best to drag you to new places during your ‘dates’. You still recall the first time he brought you for karaoke.
“Shit Y/N, you have an amazing voice! How have you not participated in any performances?” Doyoung gaped at you as you ended your rendition of Harry Styles’ Falling. Feeling shy at the compliment, you looked away.
“Shush, says the one who actually can sing. You definitely brought me here to show off.” That started the friendly banter the two of you seemed to have comfortably fallen into. It was a nice balance, keeping the to and fro sarcastic remarks you used to throw at each other, but lacking the previous maliciousness intent.
Kissing however, was still a big question mark. You definitely weren’t going to be the one rushing it, it was still your first kiss, but Doyoung didn’t seem to mind either. He’d always find a way to kiss other parts of your head other than your lips; your cheek, forehead, nose. Always asking first, and only when there were people around.
-
“Hey Y/N? I know this isn’t your cup of tea but Jaehyun’s throwing a small party this weekend. Seomin and Taeyong will be there, wanna go?” Your fake boyfriend looked at you apprehensively.
He was was right, loud music and crowds were something you pointedly avoided, but for the fake dating aspect, this party was the perfect place to be. So you took a deep breath and nodded.
Right now though, as you squeeze through yet another group of drunk teens, you start to reconsider your decision. If this was Doyoung’s definition of ‘small’ , he needed to retake English class. Speaking of which, after the first 10 minutes with you, your ‘boyfriend’ disappeared to find Jaehyun.
Not wanting to be in the stuffy house anymore, you grabbed your coat and made your way to the backyard, where it was surprisingly empty. Sitting down on the grass, you signed and wondered how your boring little life got to this point.
“Y/N?” The sound of your name made you turn around. It was Taeyong, though you couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed it wasn’t the guy you actually wanted to see.
“Oh hey, Taeyong right. Why did you come outside?” Taeyong was the popular one, there’s no way he was scared of crowds unlike you.
“I could ask you the same thing,” he laughed, the sound echoing into the darkness. “But I get a bit overwhelmed with large groups of people sometimes, so I get away to recharge. First time I’ve seen someone else at my spot though.”
“Oh, did you want to be alone? I’m sorry I definitely could leave don’t worry.” You fumbled as you started getting up, but Taeyong grabbed your wrist and pulled you back down slowly.
“It’s fine, I’m okay if it’s you.”
This line — pre-fake-dating you would have been turning red right now, heart exploding from hearing your long-time crush say that to you. But somehow, all you could think about is sharp eyes and a smirk, directed at you.
It was then when you realised.
You caught feelings for Kim Doyoung.
-
“I think rule number 2 has come true. Let’s end this Y/N.” The next day, Doyoung came up to you in class, his face closed up again, the vulnerability you’ve gotten used to seeing gone.
“What?” You could feel your heart drop.
“I made out with Seomin at the party last night.” No, no, no this could not be happening. You wished Doyoung would stop talking, stop making the dreaded feeling in your chest worse. “Plus, I heard Lee Taeyong was talking to you all night in the backyard. Good for you Y/L/N, see our plan worked.”
Never had your last name sound so foul. You were so used to Doyoung called you by name, the way he pronounced it made you smile every time. Crap you were in so deep, how did you not notice before?
But it was too late, all you could do was smile faintly and Doyoung left to sit at the other end of class. Guess this was the beginning of the end.
-
The next few weeks passed by in a blur, you were on autopilot, going to school and then leaving when the bell rang. You didn’t even have the effort to argue with Doyoung in class anymore, and since you were too distracted to study, your grades were dropping as well. Soon, you weren’t even in the top 10 anymore, well below Doyoung, but for once you couldn’t care less.
Speaking of your ex-rival, or ex-boyfriend, if you could consider that. After meeting up one last time for closure, you both agreed to let people know the break up was mutual. Since then, you avoided him like the plague. If you had to see him and Seomin together in school, it’ll break whatever remaining strength you had.
Doyoung however, had different ideas. While you were planning to sit in an empty class for lunch, since breaking up with Doyoung also meant you had no more friends, he stormed in a sat in front of you.
“What’s your issue? I just heard from Professor that you’re failing maths? Y/N failing maths?!” Oh right, you forgot about that.
“Well, my grades have been slipping slightly. At least you don’t have to worry about me beating you anytime soon.” You forced out a small laugh, avoiding his eyes. You didn’t miss the fact that he said your name once again.
“I’m worried about you. Are there any issues at home? You can’t go from being the smartest student in the year to failing maths in 2 weeks. I’ll even tutor you if you need. The hell, I know Taeyong isn’t the smartest out there but he’s a senior, can’t he help you? As your boyfriend he should do better.” Maybe you were imagining it but Doyoung even sounded angry towards the end.
“Taeyong’s not my boyfriend. I haven’t spoken to him since the party.” The boy in front of me made a noise or confusion.
“But I thought—”
“You thought wrong. Taeyong hasn’t been the one I wanted for quite some time already.” Doyoung suddenly cupped my chin and turned it, forcing me to look at him,
“Wait Y/N, do you mean?”
“Yes I’m sorry, I broke rule number one and didn’t tell you. I didn’t realise until it was too late. But it doesn’t matter, you got Seomin already, just forget it.” You tried to move away, but instead he used both hands to keep you in place, looking happy for some reason.
“Then I guess I should apologise too, I broke rule number one from the first day.” Huh, that would mean...
“Yes sweetheart, I can hear the gears turning in your head. I’ve had a crush on you for as long as I can remember. I only pretended to be rivals so that you would notice me. You can be quite in your own world sometimes. This fake dating thing was only so I could get closer to you without the hostility. I shouldn’t have lied about my feelings, but I didn’t know how else to get you to trust me.” You still couldn’t believe it, you had too many questions.
“But Seomin—” Doyoung shook his head.
“I lied, I never wanted her back. She was clingy as hell, good riddance. I also never made out with her, I promise. I saw you talking to Taeyong and having a moment, so I figured at least one of us should be happy. Didn’t think it would be that hard telling you to call the fake dating off.”
It was slowly sinking in. Doyoung liked you. Doyoung had a crush on you for a long time. Doyoung pretended to be your boyfriend to get closer to you. But all this time, his actions were genuine, and your rival liked you back. Shyly, you looked at him and smiled.
“If you liked me all this while, how come you never kissed me?” Sensing your feelings as well, Doyoung grinned.
“Because it wasn’t right if I did it before confessing properly. I know it’s your first kiss and I wanted it to be perfect.”
“Well you just confessed. And if you didn’t notice, this is me accepting and reciprocating.” Your usual snarky replies were returning. Doyoung laughed and moved over to you, wrapping his arms around your waist.
“Glad to hear those remarks again, god I missed you.” And before you had a chance to reply, he swooped down and found your lips.
You had to say, your first kiss was indeed perfect.
Note: I disappeared from this app and came back to dump this. Quite surprised by the length, maybe the ending could have been longer but I didn’t want to drag it out too much. Check out my masterlist for more fics :))
#nct 127#nct#doyoung#kim doyoung#nct doyoung#doyoung fics#doyoung fluff#doyoung angst#taeyong#jaehyun#nct fics#kpop#Kpop fics
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Here are my personal designs for the Almighty Tallests Miyuki and Spork! When I was designing these two, I had the urge to make Miyuki look beautiful and elegant, and Spork look dorky and cute. Also, yes, I went with shades of for Miyuki and shades of green for Spork, as my originality level is at zero ��
Also, in my personal AU, these two aren't dead, they actually faked their deaths (A la Pink Diamond), since they didn't want to rule the empire with a cruel hand, now they're both married to each other on some uncharted oasis planet together.
Now here's some info about these two!
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Tallest Miyuki:
Beautiful, majestic, elegant, flawless. These are just some of the words used to describe the radiant Tallest Miyuki
Almighty Miyuki was once the tallest Irken in existence, standing at a whopping 9'8".
Miyuki was the sole Tallest for over 300 Earth years.
Before she became a Tallest, Miyuki worked in the Smeeteries, and her kindness made her loved and adored by many.
Commander Staria used to be Miyuki's pupil, and ever since she was a small Irken Smeet, she looked up to her and admired her in every single way. Miyuki thought Staria was adorable and full of potential, that's why she took her under her wing. When she was a Smeet, Staria used to playfully hide in the fur around Miyuki's neck on her armor, but she didn't mind. When Staria moved on to the Academy, she did everything to make Miyuki proud, by conquering planets, defeating enemies, you name it. Others envied Staria since she was Miyuki's favorite, but she didn't care, all she cared about was making her Tallest happy.
Despite being powerful, Miyuki was known to be kind and fair, compassionate and forgiving, but was strict when she needed to be.
She was the Tallest who formed the alliance with the Vortians, and after her "death", and during "The Trial", Invader Vira told the Tallest it was the Vortians who made Zim create the blob, in a last-ditch effort to save Zim (which worked), thus ruining the peace treaty between Irk and Vort.
Miyuki owned many dangerous alien species as pets during her reign, and after her "death", all her pets were brought to a sanctuary in honor of her.
The Irken Empire was actually much more peaceful when Miyuki was ruling over it.
It was planned that Miyuki and Spork would be engaged after he was made Tallest. This remained true because after they faked their deaths, they fled to another planet that was off the intergalactic charts and were soon married.
Miyuki is voiced by Lisa Hannigan, who voices Blue Diamond in Steven Universe.
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Tallest Spork:
Just like Miyuki, Tallest Spork was known to be kind and compassionate, but he was also very intelligent, but also very cautious and uncertain.
Spork was the second tallest Irken in existence, standing at 9'4".
Before he became Tallest, he was once an Irken scientist, and Blix used to be his apprentice, and he continued to serve under Spork even when he became the Tallest.
There were rumors that Spork was half-Vortian, but this was never confirmed publicly.
He and Miyuki already had the plans and charts set for their escape, so Spork was only a stand-in Tallest until he faked his death on Devastis.
Even if the plans had failed, Spork already had future plans set for the empire.
Spork also had a fondness for plants and would often study and grow different flora discovered on multiple other planets.
Though it seems like it was an arranged marriage, Spork and Miyuki actually genuinely loved each other, and the Control Brains had to prepare a Union Ceremony (which is basically an Irken Wedding) for the two of them so they could rule the Empire together, but that was botched after the blob "incidents".
Once fleeing to the oasis planet with Miyuki, Spork remembered to bring a lot of his advanced tech so they could construct their new home/base together.
He tends to stutter a lot when talking.
Spork is voiced by Alex Brightman, who voices Puglsey in Dead End: Paranormal Park.
#invader zim#invader zim fanart#iz tallest#iz#almighty tallest#tallest miyuki#tallest spork#invader zim au#miyuki#spork#my art
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pray, do tell
request: If you don’t mind me asking, request for Loki asking the other Loki’s if they have a s/o in their timeline during episode 5?
a/n: hi ! i absolutely ADORE this idea and i hope i'll write it out respectfully :)) i loved episode 5 so much, except for SOME scenes, and i especially enjoyed multiple lokis sitting around and talking, chilling, that's like... my dream place to be. YOU DON'T KNOW THE EFFECT PRESIDENT LOKI HAS ON ME. like it should be studied in labs and schools cos ??????? that feeling when he's on screen was just something else. also ! kid loki holding alligator loki my beloved <3. i'd love to be surrounded by lokis, me and loki actually have the same personality type so they're like... my people. sorry for the rant, hahah ! this one is a bit shorter than my other loki works, sorry about that :/ also it took me like 40 minutes to find decent gifs lmao. happy reading !! <3
masterlist
mcu masterlist
warnings: nothing really
disclaimer: lokis mentioned have he/him pronouns !
Weirded out by what he's seeing, and not entirely sure it's real, Loki can't take his eyes off it, either. The way alligator Loki drinks his boxed wine is just so fascinating to him, yet weird and other-wordly (he knows those well) at the same time. And he's weirded out more by the fact that he doesn't find a variant of him being an alligator strange in any way. He's had a few trying days, as he said himself.
Loki manages to divert his eyes off the creature with horns on its head and looks to the grapes he holds in his hand. He picks small dirt away from the berries and takes a grape into his mouth with ease. The taste reminds him of many things. His childhood, his home, his family... Thor, Frigga, Odin, Sif and the Warriors Three. Asgard. The Gardens, the waters, the Bifrost. Heimdall. Visits to the city, the markets, the celebrations.
Love.
Loki blinks, fooling himself and others by aiming to portray that he's not thinking about anything important. But he is. She was the most important thing to him, and now... Well, maybe during the New York heist, she's still fine, but after Ragnarok... Loki fears too much to think about it.
He wishes he could remember everything with her that followed New York, but all he has of their future is some worn-out tape in the TVA archives. Perhaps even pictures... He wants to live through all they had now, he wishes he could do that most of all. Of course, there's the finding Mobius and helping Sylvie burn down the TVA thing, but upon remembering her, it all falls into the background.
His first love. Not a god, like him, but she was a goddess in his eyes. He smiles now, subtly, at the fond memories of her. He noticed the little moments he had with her in the tape Mobius had, about his whole future. How beautiful she always was, her subtle way of laughing and going about her smiles and giggles, how exceptional and different her clothes always were, how her hair shined in any light...
“Did any of you...” Loki starts to say, and sighs shortly before continuing, thinking he'll probably regret asking it, “did any of you leave a... a lover behind when the TVA arrested you? Prince or princess?” He looks between his variants. Young Loki shoots him a stern look. “Apologies, my liege. You seem too young for that.” Loki bids him a polite smile, but his brain whirs. “How long have you been here, anyway?”
“Don't know. Time doesn't really... exist here.” Young Loki says and throws a salt biscuit into alligator Loki's jaws. “But no lovers in my lifetime, Loki.” He pointedly looks at the older variant of himself, nodding slightly.
“Not yet, at least.” Loki points out and gets scoffs and chuckles from Boastful and Classic Loki. He looks at them with a furrowed brow.
“Oh, you and your grand plan,” Classic Loki shakes his head before taking another sip from his huge cup. Loki only rolls his eyes, but still waits for answers to his question, “well,” Classic Loki downs his drink, “it would be no surprise to you that I had countless partners before I chose isolation. Partners of any kind.” He winks. Loki nods, understanding how much alike he truly is with his variants. “But I feel there is no one truly... truly made for me. Like midgardians would say - 'the one'.“
“In my case, there were many 'the ones',” Boastful Loki says, mocking Classic's use of words. All other Lokis roll their eyes, “I actually feel like every person in the whole universe was made to be with me. I'm just that irresistible.” He smiles pleasantly to himself. Alligator Loki growls again.
“That's another “liar” from him to you, Boast,” Classic Loki nods his head towards Boastful, who only shakes his head and frowns.
“I had my fair share of men and women before I was taken,” Boastful says, “must have been the same for you, Loki.” He looks at him. “Asgard was truly a giving place.”
Loki chuckles, but looks away from his variants. “Oh, it was...” he says quietly, “it was.” His voice grows even more quiet. Young and Classic Loki exchange a look.
“Do tell us, your mischievousness.” Classic Loki urges him. Loki shoots him a nervous look, then he leans back into the sofa and sighs, his eyes strictly focused on his hands.
“I had plenty before I met... one,” he starts to say, “me and her share a past, and, it seems, a future as well. After New York, I am taken to Asgard, imprisoned, but she is there. I fake my death and rule over Asgard as Odin, and she's there. I help Thor destroy our evil sister--”
“Oh, she was a nasty one.” Boastful says, shaking his head. “We used to have a connection, but then she just... I don't even know.” He shrugs. Loki eyes him for a second before continuing.
“We destroyed Asgard, but saved its people, and saved her. We make for Midgard, and she's there with me.” Loki sighs, his eyes gloomy. “And then... Thanos attacks, destroys half, if not all our people, and...” he can't even speak further. His variants share a look, each having quite the correct guess for what could follow after that. Boastful drinks from his cup in an awkward manner. “But I feel like that's another life I lived. Or another me. I don't know, I feel so... disconnected from her, from what we had. Must be the TVA and this... void. And all that's happened, all I've learned about my future.” He sighs again.
“Meeting her again would be a wake-up call, no?” Boastful asks. Loki shrugs, a sad expression on his face.
“Rather a sign that you're real.” Classic Loki says with a wide, true smile. Loki looks to him as if looking at a mentor. “I often felt like the people I loved and the love I had for them, even if it was not reciprocated, were a reminder that I am real, I exist and I can feel all these things.”
Loki considers his words, and then nods along, finding a truth in them.
“After all, love and all other emotions are the human part in all of us.” Classic says. “And it isn't always bad to feel like a regular human being.” Loki can also find truth in those words. Love makes one feel alive, makes you feel like you're on the right path, found the right person, found your purpose. It doesn't always have to be glorious, it can be small, but nonetheless important to you.
“I used to think humans smaller than us, more pathetic and puny, but...” Loki shakes his head, “we, gods, are just the same, really.” He chuckles sadly. “Having quarrels over the stupidest things, being as imperfect as humans... Sometimes I even felt like I was too good, too perfect for something like true love, which is a pathetic emotion that makes you feel all kinds of other feelings, but...” he smiles, “often times I felt like that, she told me everyone was deserving of love, even me.” His smile grows wider.
“She sounds lovely.” Classic Loki tells him with a kind smile.
“She was that, and more.” Loki nods along. Young Loki imitates the sound of a snore and throws a crumpled piece of paper at Loki's shoulder.
“You're making me extremely bored.” He announces and sits straighter in his chair, looking over the mess that is his palace. “Love's boring.” Young Loki throws a juice carton across the room, making a face.
“You are just too young to understand and know it, your majesty.” Boastful says with a wink, and the next juice carton is flying over his head with a snicker from Young Loki. Classic Loki keeps Boastful tight in his seat so an argument wouldn't arise, and Boastful hesitantly restrains, his drink almost spilling over his cup. Loki watches them with a sappy smile on his features, and decides this is a good place to spend eternity at, even without her.
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#loki request#loki x reader#loki imagine#loki series#loki laufeyson x reader#loki laufeyson imagine#loki laufeyson imagines#loki oneshot#loki one shot#loki odinson x reader#loki odinson imagine#loki odinson imagines#har-rison-s writes#no but how old is kid loki?#how long has kid loki been in the void?#how long has classic loki been in the void?#how long has boastful loki been in the void?#which of them was the first???
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This may be an old article from 3 years ago, but these cultural aspects/observations still apply even today. And though this is strictly a Chinese perspective, a lot of these everyday life bits are observed in Overseas Chinese communities in countries such as The Philippines, Malaysia, Indonesia, etc. as well as countries heavily influenced by Chinese culture like Taiwan, Japan, and Korea.
I've always liked learning about other cultures and making comparisons between how things are done East vs West. Which probably stems from growing up with two cultures and Mom raising me on American movies xD
So the irony is if you asked me how many Chinese, Taiwanese, or Hong Kong actors I know, chances are I know as much as you do xD Like Jackie Chan, Andy Lau, and that's about it. But if you asked me about Western (specifically American and British) actors, then I have a useless brain dump of movie trivia and who was with who in what movie xD
Hmmm, both Taiwan and the Philippines are two distinct cultures but both look up to a certain country and are fascinated by that. In Taiwan's case, Japan and the US for the Philippines. In both cases, this is due to being under the rule of those countries in their history. Taiwan being under Japan for 50 years, and the Philippines being under Spain for 300+ years, followed by periods of American and Japanese rule. To put it simply though:
Taiwan is "mini-Japan with a very Chinese culture".
The Philippines is "former colony of Spain with lots of American influences".
But unlike the author, I've never set foot in any Western country, so my understandings are strictly what I've observed in media, which while it can be accurate, doesn't compare to actually experiencing the culture.
Some further elaboration on most points:
#1 We quite literally use chopsticks for everything. We use it to pick rice, viands, vegetables, fruit, smaller desserts, almost all the food you can think of.
But where do you put your chopsticks when you're not using them? Just put them on top of your bowl or flat on your plate. But do not ever stick them vertically. It's taboo, since it looks like incense sticks, which we use to pray for those who have passed, like our ancestors or during funerary services.
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#3 The majority of Asia is obsessed with fair/white skin. In my time at the Philippines, I grew up watching all these Dove Whitening commercials and my classmates often commented on how fair my skin was, how they envied it etc. In Taiwan, girls often say they don't want to 變黑 (biàn hēi) 'become dark'. Japan and Korea too are not innocent of this either (if their beauty/skin products weren't a dead giveaway).
People here at Taiwan often mistake me for being from Hong Kong or Japan (as long as I don't speak Mandarin with my heavy accent xD). A Taiwanese classmate of mine joked that she often gets mistaken for being from Southeast Asia due to having a darker complexion. And while I laughed it off with her at that time, looking back, I now realize she was lowkey being racist. xD
And believe me Filipinas have mentioned literally being told 'your skin is so dark' here in Taiwan, or being given backhanded compliments like 'you're pretty despite having dark skin' and...*facepalms*
My point is, beauty is not exclusive to skin color. People who still think that are assholes.
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#5 Not to say we don't have salt and pepper, but yes soy sauce and vinegar are the classic condiments you see on the table, be it at home or at a restaurant.
And if I may add, Taiwanese love their pepper. xD If you ever get to eat at a night market or a smaller "Mom n' Pop-style" restaurant here, some dishes/soups tend to add quite an excessive amount of pepper. Not like anthills, but quite liberally and way more than average. Enough that you see traces of pepper at the bottom of the food paper bag or swirling in your soup. xD
#6 I know this all too well from personal experience. In my years of studying at Taiwan, I always had roommates. 3 in my first school (I graduated high school in the Philippines pre K-12 so I had to make up 2 years of Senior High), followed by 2 in college, with the exception of 1 in freshman year.
My college did offer single person dorms but at around 9000 NTD ($324) per month compared to around 6000 NTD ($216) per semester. Because I wanted to save, the choice was obvious for me xD. But ah, this doesn't mean I don't value personal space, in fact I love having the room to myself, and since both my roomies would go home to their families every weekend, weekends were bliss for me xD
And you don't have to be friends with your roommates (that's an added bonus however), you just have to get along with them. I was quite lucky to have really great roommates all throughout my schooling years.
#9 In the Philippines, we do. Owing mostly to American influences and maybe being predominantly Catholic? xD
#10 *sigh* Chinese parents and parents from similar Asian cultures tend to put too much emphasis on grades, so much that kids could get sent to cram school as early as elementary. This is because what school you get into could literally affect your future job opportunities, and while that's not exclusive to any particular country/culture, I feel it's especially pronounced here in Asia. I'm really lucky my own parents weren't that strict about it. However, if your parents don't point the mistakes out to you, chances are you'll do it yourself, if you're an Asian kid like me anyway. xD It just becomes a habit.
#11 My family is an exception to this. xD We do say 'I love you' directly, but complete with the 'ah eat well ok?', 'don't scrimp on food', 'sleep well' and similar indirect words/actions of affection. We were doing 'Conceal, Don't Feel' before it became popular. xD
#13 I'm kind of confused about this but this has sort have changed over the years in which eye-contact is now more encouraged. But don't stare, especially at elders and authority figures. Sometimes it's just shyness though. xD And I've observed this with my own Taiwanese friend, especially when I'm complaining or ranting to her about something. xD I'm a person who likes to express my opinions strongly, which tends to scare/alienate some of the locals here, as doing so is kind of frowned upon. Thankfully, she does listen and offers her take on things.
#14 Ah this. xD In the Philippines, this is a common greeting known as beso-beso, and I freaked out too when an auntie did that to me. xD Needless to say, Mom lectured me later on what that was. ^^"
#16 Along with #3 another crazy beauty standard. In my view, people always look better with a little meat on them and when they're not horribly thin. Asia still has a loonng way to go with accepting different types of bodies if you ask me. This combined with modern beauty standards has made the pressure for women especially to 'look beautiful' higher than ever.
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I know many people love them but please, starving yourself or glorifying eating disorders is never OK just to get this kind of 'ideal' body. I'm not part of the Kpop fandom, but even I think when idols get bullied just for gaining the least bit of weight among other insensitive comments, that's really going too far.
#17 'If you want to make friends, go eat.' <- I couldn't agree more. In the Philippines we have a greeting: 'Kumain ka na ba?' (Have you eaten?) . Similarly in Taiwan, we have 吃飯了沒? (chī fàn le méi), both of these can mean that in the literal sense but are often used as greetings instead. By then which invitation to having lunch/dinner together may or may not follow. Food really is a way for us to socialize and to catch up with what's going on in each other's lives. Not to say we don't have regular outings like going out to the mall, going shopping, etc. but eating together is a huge part of our culture, be it with family or friends.
And while I'm at it, some memes that are way too accurate good to pass up xD
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Parents, uncles, aunties alike will fight over the bill xD
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Alternatively:
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You just space out until your name is called xD
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My parents are guilty of the last one. Logic how? xD
#18 True. xD I like giving compliments out to people but I have a hard time accepting them myself, though I've learnt how to accept them much more now than before. We're kind of raised to constantly downplay ourselves so we often say things like 'ah no no' or 'I'm really not that good'. The downside of this of course is that it can come off as somewhat fake. xD
Again from personal experience, that same classmate who made the lowkey racist remark, she was good, she was on the debate team, was a honor student, knew how to mingle with people, but she downplayed herself way too much, while praising me but I honestly thought that she never really meant it from how she treated me. She wanted to keep me around her yet make backhanded compliments at me and she didn't want me socializing with my other classmate who is now my friend. *sigh* It was only after discussing this with one of my roomies did I realize how this 'excessive downplaying' might come off to people like me who more or less grew up with a more 'Westernized' mindset. I'm not saying brag about your achievements but don't be overly humble about them either, which can also be a turn off.
#20 We do tend to be a lot more realistic on how we view things, neither entirely optimistic nor pessimistic. We try to think of things practically and often analyze things on pure logic. A downside of this however, is that Chinese people can be overly practical. Taiwanese for instance don't like to 'find inconveniences' and generally keep to themselves, meaning, they won't help you in your hour of need even when they do have the capabilities. Sounds really harsh I know, but in my 6 years of living in Taiwan, while this doesn't apply to all the people, a lot of them really do only find/talk to you when they need something.
So for some people saying Taiwanese are 'friendly', that's BS xD If you ask me, Filipinos are infinitely more friendly, and again while not all, generally make more of an effort to help you when you need it. I really felt more of a real sense of community during my years growing up in the Philippines compared to Taiwan.
#21 Children do tend to stay with their parents well into college and adulthood, since Chinese families are indeed very family-oriented, in a lot of cases, grandparents often live under the same roof as us as well! And it really does save a lot of money. I see there's a real stigma in the US when it comes to "living with your parents", but that's starting to change especially because of Covid and having more and more people move back in with their parents.
Housing unfortunately is pretty much hella expensive no matter where you go, and Taiwan is no exception. Steep housing prices and the very high cost of raising a child (schooling + buxiban fees, etc.) contribute to a very low birth rate and thus an aging population like Japan. It's not uncommon to see both parents working in Taiwan.
#23 I'm an overthinker myself, but I totally agree with the author that the best is to strike a good balance between these two. Which I guess is why I love drawing or any other related creative attempts, it helps me be more spontaneous or well, creative! I like to remain intellectually or artistically inspired.
#24 Is French high school really like that? xD My friend did watch SKAM France and more or less got a culture shock from what was depicted on the show. I can confirm however that most high schools both in the Philippines and Taiwan require students to wear a uniform, only in college is everybody free to wear casual/civilian clothes.
#26 Ah this is part of our Asian gift-giving etiquette xD We always open gifts later after the event/meeting and in private. Never open them in front of the person who gave it to you or in front of others. This is to prevent any 'shame/embarrassment' that may result both to yourself and to the gift giver. I know this may come off as something weird since some people may want a more honest response or immediate feedback when it comes to gift-giving, but that's just how it is in our culture. You're always free to ask us though (in private) if we liked the gift or not ^^"
#28 I want to say the same goes to drinking, partying, and drugs however xD Those are things which are still frowned upon in our culture. And to be honest, whenever I see those in movies, it does kind of turn me off xD It doesn't mean that we're "uncool" or "boring", we just think that there are much better or healthier ways of "having fun".
#31 Is this true in France?! Man I would kind of prefer that instead of people being on their phones all the time xD This kind of goes with #20 in that Chinese are overly practical or logical, and don't read fiction as much as nonfiction. My Taiwanese friend is an exception though, she's a bibliophile who loves the feel of paper books compared to e-books, and it's a trait of her that I like a lot. Both the Philippines and Taiwan however have a huge fanbase when it comes to manga and anime though.
I'm all for reading outside of "designated reading" at schools especially. Reading fiction improves your vocabulary too, and can be quite fun! It helps you imagine and really invest in a world/story, and if you ask me something that I feel Westerners are better at, they're more in touch with their emotions and creativity, and are thus much more able to write compelling or original stories. Believe me, I've seen a fair amount of Chinese movies that rip off Western movie plotlines xD
#33 Nothing much to add on here..except that since I'm a "weird" person, Mom often jokes that she got the wrong baby from the hospital. xD
#35 True. While I agree with the care and concern that your fellow community can give you, the downside of this is we tend to only hang out with our own people, e.g Chinese with Chinese, Taiwanese with Taiwanese, etc. I've seen too that it's especially hard to make friends in Japan and Korea as a foreigner. Not only is there the language barrier, but the differences in culture too. In a way, Asians can be pretty close-minded on getting to know other cultures or actually making friends with people from other countries. I know this all too well being half-Taiwanese/half-Filipino, being neither "Filipino" enough nor "Taiwanese" enough. xD It's more of people here being too used to what they're comfortable with.
#36 Oh this is something I feel that Chinese students and other students from similar cultures should really improve on. xD How will people respect you if you don't speak your mind?
I felt bad especially for my Spanish teacher in college, granted it was an introductory course (Spanish I and II) but the amount of times that our teacher had to prompt a student to recite/speak even with clear hints already made her (and me too) extremely frustrated. The thing is, these are college students, I personally feel they don't have any reason to be so shy of speaking and technically by not doing so they're slowing the pace of the class too much and a lot of time is wasted.
Unfortunately you can't always be very vocal with your thoughts and opinions in most Asian cultures. I would say strive for that, but at the same time, play your cards well, especially if you're in a workplace setting.
If you made it to the end, thank you for reading and here's a cookie! 🍪 I'm not perfect and there's bound to be something I missed so please let me know if you spotted anything wrong. Feedback/questions are very much welcome and please feel free to share about your country/culture's differences or similarities!
#asia#asian#culture#asian culture#chinese#chinese culture#east asia#china#taiwan#japan#korea#southeast asia#philippines#malaysia#indonesia#thailand#vietnam#travel#I didn't tag every country due to a lack of understanding or not meeting or being around people of that country#I know I shit on Taiwan a lot but believe me Taiwan has a lot of good parts too - it's just that it focuses too much on those now xD#and there are too many YouTube videos that only talk about the good parts of Taiwan - and while those are true#I felt that by not being honest with some very serious faults - it doesn't give a fair/clear perspective to others#especially people who in the future may want to work/travel here
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Movie/Game/Show: Danganronpa: Killing Harmony Dynamic: Korekiyo Shinguji/Reader (and his sister shit but i actually take it seriously, unlike kodaka) Warnings: korekiyo’s backstory/trauma (his sister), sexual/physical/mental abuse implications (and outright said but not described in detail except the emotional and mental), anxiety in both kork and reader and mental breakdown(s?), airhead shit but it’s sad Summary: It’s all her fault. ~~~
Korekiyo suddenly turned to the girl beside him in his quiet research lab, “Have you ever heard of Jack of Fables, (Y/n)?” at her, albeit confused, nod, he continued, “Well, all those myths, fairy tales, and even nursery rhymes in reference to ‘Jack’ are actually about the same man. What this means is that Jack Be Nimble, of the candlestick, Jack the Giant Killer, who sold his cows then murdered and robbed a giant, Stingy Jack, who tricked the devil so relentlessly that he was banned from both afterlives, Jack of Jack and Jill, who cracked open his skull, Jack o’ Lantern, Spirit of Halloween and Headless Horseman, and Jack Frost, Spirit who ends autumn and begins winter are all one in the same. He made so many poor life decisions that he now serves as an immortal representation of winer with a pumpkin serving as head and flashlight. Is that not fascinating?”
“Aw,” (Y/n) grinned, nodding once again, “Like the American ‘Florida man’.”
Korekiyo sighed, disappointment palpable in his tone, “That is… actually much more accurate than I wish to admit.”
“Wait, wait,” she tilted her head, patting the man’s arm despite his attention already being on her, “So… like, was he also Jack the Ripper…?”
His eyes widened at her statement, “(Y/n), I must be grateful you were not born to the life of a woman of the night in Victorian London because I assure you, Jack the Ripper was incredibly real.”
“Oh, that’s so sad…” she pouted before clearing it back into her usual smile almost instantly, “Well, thanks for the folklore fun fact, Kiyo! I didn’t know that Jack was so dumb! God, I’d hate to be like him…”
“You do realize you’re not so bright yourself, yes?”
She shrugged, “I’m fine with that, but at least I’m not tricking the devil!”
So sweet and kind, the Ultimate Composer was. Against all expectations, she wasn’t highbrow or traditionally genius, but she was more than excellent company. And, to top it off, the idea of turning her into one of Sister’s friends was oddly… sickening.
It should’ve been perfectly fine - she was a deeply respectable young woman unlike Miu and Maki, there’s no reason he could have against her.
It just felt wrong.
“Oh! Oh!” she burst out, clapping her hands together, before turning and reaching into a bag slung around her hip. Rooting through scrapped sheet music and notes, once she found what she’d been searching for she held it up excitedly, “Boom!”
Korekiyo took the item, just barely brushing his wrapped fingertips against hers, “Cleopatra’s Pearl Cocktail… much appreciated,” he pressed the small bottle into a pocket on his uniform, “If you enjoy giving gifts, perhaps we can discuss cultural gift-giving practices?”
“Ooh, Kiyo’s gonna teach me?”
“Hmm,” Korekiyo hummed quietly to himself, “Well, perhaps… you would prefer I tell you of a composition piece in relevance to mythology, yes?”
“That’d be nice,” the girl giggled softly, rubbing the back of her neck, “To be honest, I just like when you talk… you sound so smart all the time!”
“My thanks, (Y/n),” he nodded curtly, muttering to himself before coming to speak up, “Alright, I believe that the composition for you would be The Ring of the Nibelung, of Germany.”
“Oh, I know that one!” she knew most ‘ones’, to be fair.
“I had suspected so, but have you heard of the heroic legends behind the pieces?”
“Ah, no… are those what you’re gonna explain?”
“I had planned to, yes. Alright, well, the four parts, as you know, are The Rhinegold, The Valkyrie, Siegfried, and Twilight of the Gods. Nowadays, they are most commonly played as individual, separate works despite making one complete story. They were always intended as a sequence - as The Ring cycle, cleverly. Each piece revolves on a loose basis to German heroic tales and Norse legendary sagas, with the overarching tale of the magic ring forged by the Nibelung dwarf, Alberich, which grants the power to rule the world,” he paused at the sight of (Y/n) yawning, his lips pursed and eyes shot down to his shoes before flickering back up to the girl, “Ah, my apologies for taking far longer than necessary. You must find this- “
“Ah, no!” (Y/n) shook her head, waving her hands about as though it would physically prove how far from needed his apology was, “That’s not it! I’m just kinda tired, ya know?” as if to prove her point, another yawn washed over her, “I hadn’t slept well last night after Kirumi…”
“I see,” Korekiyo nodded, closing his eyes to think over his words, “I apologize for making it about myself. If you wish, I could walk you to your dormitory. Now that you mention it, it has been quite the long day.”
“You don’t have to, Kiyo, I’d hate to bother you so much in one day let alone one sitting,” the composer puffed her cheeks out, “That’d be so obnoxious…”
“I don’t find it obnoxious whatsoever, especially if it’s to aid- “ he hesitated, “to aid a friend.”
He hadn’t had friends before. People usually found him creepy and that was the end of the story - nobody approached him and he didn’t branch out. Life went on. The world spun. His loneliness was everlasting and yet nonexistent. He has Sister. Though, deep down, he knows. She’s on another plane of reality with loneliness stronger than his, that’s why he sends her respectable young women.
Just like (Y/n).
But just… not (Y/n). For reasons he personally chooses to not disclose to even himself.
“Aww, Kiyo! You care!” the girl placed a hand over her heart as if to show that the organ itself was squeezing in delight at his offer.
“Of course, I do,” Korekiyo didn’t like how quiet she made him. How jittery and nervous. And he didn’t like how it made him question the way Sister made him feel.
She also made him nervous but it felt different. He liked to pretend it was the nervousness of a love you don’t quite have yet, but he fully knows he’d be lying. She was a mean girl, a bully in school before being hospitalized. Prone to violent and outright frightening outbursts when she had the energy to do more than force him to her side.
But he didn’t like questioning those feelings for Sister. Who he was, was based on her. His uniform. His passion and talent. His hair. His perfect complexion. His life as the universe knows it is an ode to her.
It’s too late for him to go back now… he’s already done so much in her name it’d be cruel to give up now. He might as well continue for Sister.
“If you really don’t mind, then yeah, I’d like it if we could walk together… I get a little nervous going around at night, you never know who’s gonna snap…”
“And you trust me?”
Shit. That’s what gets him in trouble. It’s as Sister always said. ‘Too naive to make his choices, and once he’s free, too inept to make the right ones.’
“Well, yeah,” (Y/n) spoke as if there was hardly any thought to the answer, “All you’ve shown me is somebody worth trusting,” then, she’s quick to remember poor Kaede, “Well, maybe I’m being silly. But hey, if I have to choose between dying trusting my friends and paranoid beyond myself, then maybe I’d- “ she paused, “Ehhh, I don’t like the way that’s coming out.”
“I understand what you’re attempting to say,” Korekiyo reassured, turning towards his research lab’s exit, “Let us start towards the dormitories, yes?”
“Right!” (Y/n) nearly found herself jogging to catch up to Korekiyo’s long-strided head start, she clutched the strap of her bag as she did so, “So… you heard about Angie’s plan, right?”
“To perform a resurrection?”
“Do you think it’ll work?” she seemed antsier than was typical for her, “I mean, you’re into anthropology, so, like, has there ever been a case where that did work? Do you know?”
“No, besides, that would be more akin to history, remember?” she probably didn’t, her memory failed her at an ungodly amalgamation of best and worst of times.
“Oh, yeah,” she murmured and nodded, pretending to recall the difference between the two.
“Who would you desire back into this game, if you could?”
“Rantaro,” her answer was quick, her fingers looping together nervously, “We didn’t really talk much, but uhm, whenever we did - he was really nice. He said I reminded him of a sister of his… so that’s a good thing, right?”
Depends on who you ask, really.
“You grew attached to him so quickly?” there was no jealousy there, he tried to convince himself.
“I’d be lying if I said I didn’t wish I’d gotten to know him more. He was always running around, trying to save us, and in the end… it got him killed.”
A lot of things will get you killed.
Korekiyo shook off the thoughts racking his brain, “Your care for him even through his estrangedness and peculiarity is truly beautiful, (Y/n),” he fiddled with the locket piece hanging around his shoulders, “Even your care for myself. I’d be lying if I’d said it wasn’t endearing.”
“You’re not…” her words died out, not wanting to lie to a dear companion of hers, “You’re a little off-putting but you’re not undeserving of love, Kiyo.”
It was a complete 180 from what Sister had told him his entire life. A new lesson coming in far too late. He had to earn love. He should’ve been crawling on his knees and pleading for affection, but now he was supposed to simply receive it? It sounded so incredibly fake. A fictitious tale told alongside gumdrop fairies and candy trees.
No place for someone of realistic standard.
No place for him.
“You’re far too kind, (Y/n).”
“Maybe you just haven’t known nice people,” she suddenly stopped, slapping a palm to her mouth and muffling against it, “I’m so sorry!”
“Worry not,” Korekiyo continued walking, “I’m unphased.”
Because maybe it was true.
Maybe Sister wasn’t so nice.
There was an itch at his skin in the thought and he shook his head.
Sister was kind enough to love someone like him. Who was of rotted soul and rancid heart.
“I shouldn’t have just said that, especially since I don’t really know your life…”
“Would you like to learn it someday?”
(Y/n) was fairly shocked at how quickly he seemed to breeze by her insult to his family and friends - well, if he had any friends - but she wouldn’t refuse. It was extra time with Korekiyo! Who could turn that down?
“I’d love to.”
~~
“Tea and cookies,” (Y/n) pumped a fist in the air, “What could be better than enjoying those with a friend?”
Korekiyo felt his lips twitch up behind his mask at the rhetorical question, he reached out for his teacup, “Perhaps freedom from this killing game?”
“Oh, yeah, huh…” she deflated, “Jeez, I can’t believe I’d say that…”
Oh, great, of course, now he’s gone and made the local ball of sunshine in this school upset.
“Nevermind that, (Y/n), it was a tease…” he gripped the cup a little tighter, cheeks heating up in humiliation at his failed joke, “I apologize if it seemed like anything other than such.”
“No, don’t apologize, it’s fine! It was kind of a dumb thing to say, now that I put some brain into it,” so it made sense she’d said it, (Y/n) frowned at the bitter thought.
“Ah,” the clink of a cup against the table caught the girl’s attention, “I must change my mask in order to properly enjoy this tea and these cookies,” as the anthropologist went to turn, he was stopped by another outburst from the girl.
“No, don’t! Uh, here!” she clenched her eyes shut, papped her palms over her face, and turned her head downwards, “See? Now I can’t!”
“You don’t have to go to such lengths, I could simply turn- “
“No, no, I want you to feel comfortable and I heard once that doing things to make your friends comfortable is, like, a way to make them like you more?” she huffed at the wording, “Just, I don’t know… I want you to know that I care. Ya get it? No need to turn yourself away like that when I can just not look.”
A tuft of air passed through his nostrils at the girl.
Sister would adore a friend like her.
Korekiyo pulled down his mask, brows drawn tight towards his eyes at the new realization. It was no longer a matter of her being respectable, it was now the knowledge that someone as tender-hearted as (Y/n) would be loved beyond comprehension by Sister.
But… no. Sister couldn’t have her. She’d understand, right? Of course. She could have someone else - the other bubbly girl, what’s her name? Angie. She could have Angie.
Korekiyo just… he just needed (Y/n). Something about her was calming and sweet. He picked his mask for eating from a pocket in his uniform and carefully adjusted it over his lips so as to not smudge his lipstick. It wouldn’t anyway, he knew this, but it usually never backfired to be too sure.
The lipstick in itself was quite the hassle. Another homage to Sister that she might not even be seeing. So was the hair. It got tangled and knotted and was hell to dry after a shower.
“Not to rush you at all, but are you done? Cuz my eyes are starting to hurt… I think I’m squeezing them too hard.”
“Right, yes, I am.”
He really shouldn’t think like that… Sister deserved to be honored.
As if she’d been reading his mind, (Y/n) leaned over slightly, pointing at Korekiyo’s hair, “Hey, hey, how do you manage that? It always looks so silky and soft and well-kept.”
“Ah, well, it is quite troublesome most days, but with patience and rather expensive products, I keep it together.”
“I was wondering, too, do you ever put it up?”
“Not usually, though, that would be… nice on occasion,” he sipped at his tea, enjoying the way (Y/n) shyly glanced away to prove she didn’t want to invade his privacy. She was too delightful to be in a place such as this, even if he did enjoy the beauties of law-absence.
“Uh, I don’t want to come off pushy or like you have to let me, but if you want, I’d love to put your hair up! To be honest, I’ve been wanting to for a while,” her eyes widened at her own statement, “Oh, that sounded creepy. I’m so sorry.”
“I am hardly one to judge,” he reached over for a cookie, “But, if you’re so inclined, I won’t protest.”
“Yay!” she bounced slightly in her chair, “Oh, that’s great, Kiyo, thanks.”
“Shall we go to your dorm after finishing our refreshments?”
“I’d like that,” (Y/n) grinned.
And to think she almost didn’t approach Korekiyo on that first day in the school. How ridiculous could she have been to judge based on looks? Sure, he was a little strange and the way he spoke was unlike any teenager she’d ever met, but he was still a person. He deserved to be given companionship.
Besides, he’d only ever shown her kindness and support.
He didn’t even make fun of her when she said something stupid in front of everyone.
She cringed at the memory of every time Kokichi or Miu or Maki prodded at her. Even Ryoma and Kaito had picked on her when she misspoke during the first trial and just brought up a point the class had already proven. It made her heart wrinkle and shrink at the mere thought. Kokichi still made fun of her for questioning Tsumugi’s whereabouts during Rantaro’s murder.
“You’re staring into your tea, it will grow cold if you only look at it.”
“Oh, yeah,” shaking her head, (Y/n) silently cursed herself for spacing out. What an awful habit of hers, it was, “Sorry for taking so long.”
“You shouldn’t apologize, I’m not upset in the slightest,” he felt his heart lighten at the tiny smile that illuminated her face, “I simply enjoy spending this time together.”
“You’re too nice sometimes, Kiyo,” she giggled, but they both recognized the tingle of nervousness jumbling within it, “If you’re not careful, I might fall for you or something…”
“Maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad thing?”
I wouldn’t mind, she wanted to say.
If you’ll have me, he wished to murmur.
Then he felt his chest tighten.
“Can I…” he tapped a finger to the table, “ask you a question?”
“Of course.”
“Have you ever been in love?”
“Uhm,” she bit her lip as she thought back, “No… why?”
“How do you think it feels?”
“Like, you could be free and yourself around the person? I’m not too sure, but I think if you and someone else are in love then you’ll accept each other completely, you know? Sure, there’s flaws in every person, but I think you accept those, too.”
“I see…”
“Kiyo, why do you ask?”
“I…” his brows furrowed, “A lot has been on my mind as of late.”
“Alright, I won’t pry,” standing from the dining table, (Y/n) clapped her hands together, “Now, if you’re still down, I’d love to put your hair up!”
“As it stands, I am still, as you put it, ‘down’,” Korekiyo nodded before joining the girl and starting towards her dorm room.
“Nice!” she pointed directly ahead, “Now, onward!”
A total airhead at her truest, Korekiyo thought. He didn’t usually partake in the type, but something about (Y/n) just pulled him in tighter every time he tried turning away.
So, what’s the harm in giving in? Swimming against the tide only ever led to drowning anyway, so why fight it?
Sister… Sister was dead. Is dead. Resurrection isn’t possible and hasn’t been in human history. And she had changed so much of him. (Y/n) would never force him to bend to her ideal.
The more he thought about Sister in comparison to (Y/n), the more he realized that Sister felt like a ball and chain - and (Y/n) felt like a breath of fresh air.
Just her name inside his own head sounded as sweet as the best form of heaven.
“Here we are!” (Y/n) cheered upon their arrival to her room, “There’s probably a bunch-load of unfinished works in here so just… don’t judge them too harshly, okay?”
“I could hardly judge an unfinished masterpiece.”
“I don’t know about masterpieces…”
“If you create them with heart and soul, there’s nobody who can effectively say they aren’t except for yourself,” Korekiyo enters the room after her, legs carrying him towards her desk as she roots around her bathroom for a hairbrush and hair tie, “Sadly, this is also applicable to disasters with effort put into them. However, just from skimming these, I can tell you they are not such disasters.”
“Aw, thanks, Kiyo, you know - I know I’m the Ultimate Composer and junk, but jeez it gets so nerve-wracking when people hear my stuff. I like what I write, but who’s to say other people will?”
“I understand that. Showing others your work is extremely unsettling at times,” he followed the girl to her bed and sat between her knees on the floor, “I recall feeling that way when I would dabble in artistry.”
“You can draw?”
“I would when I was much younger,” he felt her fingers run over his scalp and through his hair and the weight looming over his shoulders practically melted off, “I haven’t held onto any of them, and they’ve likely aged poorly, but I know how I felt showing them around.”
“Why’d you stop? If you don’t mind my asking,” reaching around, (Y/n) threaded her fingers through Korekiyo’s bangs and, as gently as humanly possible, pulled the hair hanging over and around his face back into a slicked style.
“My… sister, she always rathered that I participate in anthropology with her. I wasn’t all that good anyways.”
“Aw, that’s kinda sad. Even if you weren’t good, you could’ve improved over time.”
“Do you truly believe that, (Y/n)?”
“Of course, I mean, talents are just developed over time, right? Angie didn’t pop out of the womb an art genius and I didn’t start off great at writing music, you just keep at it and eventually your skill level is way better than when you started.”
Sister always said he’d be garbage at drawing. Somebody like him could never learn.
She tied off and twisted until the bun was perfect - well, not perfect. It was presentable enough, and it was just a bun anyway! Not like they had anywhere to be.
“Sorry it’s messy,” she scratched at her cheek, feeling anxious that he’d be upset with her work.
“I…” he felt another little smile peek over him, it was indeed messy with stray hairs sticking out here and there and a few tiny bumps running over his head, but even so, “I love it.”
“You do?”
“It’s a gesture from you, why wouldn’t I?”
Standing beside Korekiyo at the mirror, (Y/n) twiddled her thumbs before spewing out her question, “It’s totally cool if not, but can I hug you? Sorry if that’s weird!”
“No… it’s…” Sister never asked to touch him, and now that he thought about it, she never seemed to care when he told her to stop, “That would be wonderful.”
As her arms slowly came around him, he felt truly at ease. With Sister, there was always this fear of never being what she wanted. That she hated him deep down. With (Y/n), it felt like finally being attached to someone you were meant to. Returning to a place of deep affection.
“You truly do care about me, don’t you, (Y/n)?”
“What kind of question is that?” she back-pedals, “I mean, of course, I do. You’re very dear to me, Kiyo.”
Maybe even a little too dear, considering the current climate of the killing game.
But even so, neither of them pulls away. Neither cares enough to wrangle themselves from indulging in the other’s touch. It feels too good against their skin.
It’s then that Korekiyo’s brain strikes the flint to create the burning thought - maybe Sister wasn’t all that great. Maybe Sister didn’t love him.
She’s only ever made him miserable, now that he recalls it all.
(Y/n) doesn’t. She makes him feel human and alive and adored. He likes the way she makes him feel. And between the two, he much rather would be praised than berated.
~~
Oh God, what did this mean again?
Where do the creation myths go?
Who’s Princess Kaguya?
Her head throbs at the thoughts rumbling through her. She tried to get Korekiyo to get someone, anyone, but her to organize his notes.
Shuichi would love this stuff! You two should bond!
Gonta could learn about being gentlemanly from you! It’d be a great learning experience!
I know you don’t like Miu that much, but maybe spending more time together could make you understand each other more?
Anyone.
And yet, Korekiyo denied. He liked spending time with her. He wouldn’t mind answering every question she had - no matter how many times she asked it. He was a patient person, he could handle it.
(Y/n) looked at all the books and stray papers surrounding her alike, bottom lip tugged between her teeth in focus and face beating hot in vivid embarrassment. He wasn’t even looking at her, thank God, but still… it was so mortifying that she’d already lost track of what she was doing.
She tried so hard to pay attention, she really, really did!
She wanted to help so bad. She wanted to be useful so bad.
But she knew… she’s not a smart person, per se. It was beaten over her head repeatedly her entire life by her family, schooling, peers, and even her friends. She was an idiot who couldn’t do anything right.
It’s why she wanted Korekiyo to ask someone else.
But how could she say no to him? He was always so nice, it’d be downright mean to refuse him. Right?
She felt her eyes burn, vision growing blurry through tears. Setting down the papers in her hands - (Y/n) covered her eyes to keep any wetness from splotching the notes below. It was the least a fucking moron could do.
“(Y/n)? Are you feeling okay?”
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
She nodded shakily, just wanting Korekiyo to ignore her and continue his work. Better yet, he’d kick her out and she could dodge the incoming humiliation altogether.
“Yeah,” her voice cracked, lips trembling.
Goddammit.
She heard papers rustling before she could feel the presence at her side. Fingertips just barely grazing her body before hesitating back, “You’re lying.”
Understatement of the year.
“I just… I’m so sorry, Kiyo. I’m such an idiot, I knew I couldn’t do this,” she whimpered, desperately trying to grab and suffocate down her bubbling sobs before they wracked her throat, “I’m too fucking dumb to do anything right… I’m sorry…”
“No, no, don’t apologize. You’ve done nothing wrong and you’re no idiot,” he’s immediately slammed with every memory of every time he’s called her such a thing. No matter how nice he tried to be about it, he still aided her insecurity, “I’m sorry for ever saying you were. Intellect is not measured by how well you can do a task nor should everyone’s mind be measured the same. Intelligence is fickle and is spread over a vast variety of subjects. You’re not an idiot for not being able to do something you’re not accustomed to.”
“I just… I- I wanted to help you but then I forgot everything you said about organizing them and then which regions are which and what even is a gorgon?”
He chuckled quietly at her question, “A creature in Greek mythology most commonly in reference to three sisters - Medusa, Euryale, and Sthenno - with hair made of living, venomous snakes that turned those who so much as looked upon them to stone,” he glanced around at what (Y/n) had gotten done, “I see that the filing in relation to music is nearly completed for your half.”
“That’s about all I’m good for.”
“And I would not have managed that so easily, music was never an incredible strength of mine - though I do admire it.”
“Don’t lie to me, Kiyo…”
“I would never,” he moved his notes away to sit more comfortably next to the girl, “In fact, if you’d be willing to listen…” his throat tightened and heart thumped in his chest, “I would like to tell you of something that’s been troubling me for quite some time.”
“Yeah,” she wiped away her tears, sniffling, “of course.”
“I told you of my sister, correct?” he waited for her nod of confirmation to continue, “Well, it’s my belief that…” his fists clenched.
What if she didn’t believe him? What if she blamed him? How do you tell someone your older sister raped and abused you when you’re barely even coming to terms with the fact yourself?
“(Y/n), I…” he stopped, gut bunching in knots before he suddenly ripped down his mask and turned to face her, “I think I need help…”
“What? You’re just wearing lipstick, Kiyo, there’s nothing wrong with that.”
“No, no, no, no,” he shook his head, hands shaking wildly as he pulled out the ponytail (Y/n) had done up earlier and yanked through his hair, “E-everything I am is because of her! She consumes me even in death! She- she- she hurt me…”
“Oh,” the girl moved to sit up on her knees, hands reaching out but not yet touching him, “What happened, Kiyo? You can tell me, I’m listening.”
“She told me I was an awful boy, nobody but her could love someone so foul and creepy… she- “ he moved to grip his sleeves, “She touched me,” he looked into the girl’s eyes, “Is it my fault? Am I so disgusting? Why would she do this?”
“Do you want me to hold you or no?” at his shaky nod, she instantly took Korekiyo into a hug, cradling his head and shoulders to her body and stroking through his hair, “You’re more than what she made you. You’re bigger and better than her manipulation. And it’s not your fault she did what she did. It’s completely and totally on her. She took advantage of you, Kiyo, that’s not your fault.”
He grabbed her arm and pressed his face into her shirt as she held him, “Am I rotten? Am I lovable?”
“You’re the best person I’ve ever met. You’re worthy of love and care.”
His lipstick smeared over her shirt and across his cheek and neither of them minded. It would wash off eventually. Her stain on his life would come out.
“When we get out,” (Y/n) began again, “do you want to seek professional help? You can get it, Kiyo.”
He was slow to nod, beginning to grow tired from dosing out tears and trauma at once, “I do… thank you, (Y/n)...”
“No need to thank me.”
“(Y/n)?” she hummed quietly in acknowledgement, “Even if it isn’t for field work… I wish to travel the country with you. I want to show you the beauty of humanity as I know it… for our sakes.”
Looking down, (Y/n) caught the gentleness in his eyes, tender and soft and awaiting her response, she smiled softly, brushing back his hair, “I would love to, Kiyo. If it’s truly something you want to do, I would be happy to go anywhere with you.”
~~
Nighttime was quickly approaching and with the atmosphere and turmoil of the class, (Y/n) didn’t feel very safe being out so late.
“You’re certain you don’t wish for me to walk you to your room?”
“No, you finish up here,” (Y/n) waved off Korekiyo’s offer, “Don’t be such a worry-wart, yeah? I’ll be fine! You better take care of yourself while I’m gone, though.”
He nodded, a small smile stretching over him, “I will, dear (Y/n), don’t worry.”
The girl’s eyes widened slightly before she returned his beam, “You have a cute smile, Kiyo.”
“Oh,” right, he didn’t have his mask on at the moment. It was refreshing to wake up and not trouble himself with makeup for a woman he wasn’t sure even cared - dare he say it, it was nice, even.
He’d only taken his mask off around (Y/n), it felt intimate. Sweet. Something passed only between them.
“Thank you.”
She nodded before turning back and pressing outward from his research lab, “I’ll see ya tomorrow, Kiyo! You better have the sweetest dreams, ya hear me?”
“You as well.”
He returned to cleaning up his lab, occasionally stumbling over a floorboard looser than the others. How troublesome.
That’s when her voice picked up from within his brain.
“You never loved me.”
He looked around despite knowing exactly where the voice was coming from.
“You let her do this to you. You let her take you from me.”
Pushing past them, he persisted in rooting through his notes and organizing his papers.
“She hates you. She’s scared of you. She’s just trying to be nice. You scare her. You scare all of them. You rotten, rotten boy. You’ve been ruined - only I could love a face so hideous and broken. A horrible, horrible boy lucky enough to be given the love I did.”
His hands shook, fingers twitching and heart thrumming heavy, “No. (Y/n) likes me. She enjoys my company.”
“Why would she enjoy the company of someone so lonely and depressing? So gross and foul? She probably hates you for partaking in your own sister’s touch.”
“No, she- she doesn’t… she knows it’s not… it’s not my fault…”
“Are you inside her head? How do you know? How are you certain? I’m the only one who ever loved you - and you’ve abandoned me. Left me all alone.”
“No, I- I haven’t abandoned you, Sister! Please, believe me, I never abandoned you.”
“So, you know what you must do to prove yourself to me.”
“(Y/n) wouldn’t like that…”
“(Y/n) wouldn’t like you anyway.”
She’s right, right? She’s right. Someone as wonderful and beautiful as (Y/n) could never adore him the way he does her. He loves her and she must find him repulsive. Staying out of fear.
Out of pity for the boy abused by his sister. And so, who better to return to than the more predictable of the two?
(Y/n) may have felt more like coming home than Sister - but Sister was home. (Y/n) was comfort. Sister was familiarity.
He found his foot planted against the loose floorboard once again. He knew how he had to make up for his misdeeds and abandonment.
~~
“I’m truly relieved to see that you got to your room safely,” Korekiyo murmured to (Y/n).
“Huh? Oh yeah,” she pointed over to their local gentle giant, “Gonta and I crossed paths on my way and he wanted to walk me to my room and I just couldn’t say no to him. It’s nice to have someone you trust in this ‘game’. Well, other than you,” the elevator jumbled slightly as it dove down into Monokuma’s makeshift courtroom, “I trust you, obviously.”
She shouldn’t. And he wants to tell her that.
But as Kokichi and Shuichi take glances at him from across the elevator, he knows that she’ll figure things out soon enough.
And, during the trial, when Shuichi’s convicting Korekiyo of the murder of Angie Yonaga and Tenko Chabashira - she does. And she cries and screams and throws a fit. Demanding Korekiyo to fight back harder. Demanding Shuichi to stop lying and get serious. Because Korekiyo would never kill somebody.
He was nice. He was a gentleman. He cared about people. He had stolen her heart - and a man who managed that wouldn’t kill anybody. So, of course, Shuichi was lying.
“Do I have to remind you of what’ll happen if you don’t vote?” Monokuma bit out.
(Y/n) clutched at her hair - she knew what she had to do. But every time she went to vote for Korekiyo, her body wouldn’t let her.
Reaching over, the boy himself took her hand in his, “Allow me,” as he guided her hand over her voting panel. No matter how she swatted at his hand or tried to wrench herself from Korekiyo’s grip, he pressed her vote into his name.
She was forced to watch as he was strung up and spun. Made dizzy and sickly. She was made to watch as he fell into the melting pot. Fires eating at his body until he was no more than spirit.
As Monokuma and the sister who had harmed him so horrifically worked as one to rid the world of his soul.
Eyes went to (Y/n) as the execution subsided. Her sobs and hiccups drawing everyone’s attention.
Gonta was the first to approach, a large hand settling on the girl’s back as she cried, silently taking her into a hug.
Her heart wrenched, fingers squeezing at Gonta’s suit and throat rubbing raw with her wild wails.
He could’ve gotten help. He could’ve gotten out with everyone. If she’d just stayed with him then she could’ve done something. Angie and Tenko would be here. Korekiyo would be here.
“Alright, that’s enough,” Kaito’s voice peeked through, “Don’t cry because he’s gone, (Y/n). Move forward - for both of you.”
“I…” she shook her head, choking on a sob, “I don’t think I can…”
Shuichi placed a hand on Kaito’s shoulder, “Just give her a little time.”
As the group moved out of the courtroom, Gonta stayed by (Y/n)’s side up until she clumsily made her way into her dorm room.
Immediately, she collapsed into her bed sheets. Dreading tomorrow. And the next day. And the one after that. And the one after that. And so on. And so forth. Maybe she should’ve known better than to go around falling for a guy in the killing game. Maybe she should’ve held herself up in her room all alone.
There was no escape from this feeling. No hiding. It may get better over time - but Korekiyo would always be gone.
A buzz at the door caught her attention. Her movements were sluggish, honestly just hoping that whoever was there had given up and left by the time she finally answered.
Shuichi stood there, classically uneven, anxious smile and all, “I think there’s something you might be interested in? If you’ll follow me.”
No verbal response was given, only (Y/n) stepping out of her room and shutting the door behind her to give him her confirmation.
He began towards the casino. With a sigh, (Y/n) was about to tell Shuichi off - she didn’t need to start gambling to get over Korekiyo’s death - until he stopped in front of the building.
“I mostly just wanted you to get some fresh air,” he says earnestly before digging in his pocket and pulling out a key with a heart-shaped handle, “I got this from here. You can get your own or keep this one, I think you need it more than I do,” at her confusion he continues to explain, “It can take you into this weird dream-like state where you can see what ‘ideal’ you play in our classmates’ minds… I think you know who I gave this to you for.”
“Kiyo…”
“Yeah. You can see him again, if you want.”
She wanted to be strong and push the key back into Shuichi’s hand - instead, she just looked between him and the key in her hold and nodded slowly, “Thank you, Shuichi…”
He placed a hand on her shoulder, “Sleep well, (Y/n). I know you can grow past this.”
Because he did.
“I’ll try.”
But he wasn’t her. And Kaede was gone far before Korekiyo. And their grief was not the same.
“Thanks again, Shuichi.”
“Just take your time, okay?”
“Yeah, okay.”
~~
Her knees felt like collapsing under the weight of her nerves, hand falling to the doorknob of the hotel room.
She pushed through her anxiety and found herself in a red-tinted room, a large heart-shaped bed in the center with a merry-go-round circling it. Then, she found Korekiyo standing to the side.
What would his ‘ideal’ version of her be? A friend? An out-of-touch acquaintance? A lover?
Her heart throbbed at the last possibility.
“Ah, my dear, back so soon?”
“Oh, yeah, sorry…”
“Why are you apologizing?”
“I’m, uhm, not sure?”
I’m sorry I couldn’t help you.
“Then don’t,” he seemed to glide across the room, taking the girl’s cheeks in his hands, “You’ve always had a problem with that, my love.”
My love? My love.
“Ah, yeah, sorry,” she huffed at her own word selection, “Oh…”
Korekiyo chuckled quietly, pulling down his mask to kiss her forehead, “I already took my medication while you were out.”
“Your medication?”
“Yes, from the doctor. You were the one who pushed me to go, have you forgotten?”
“Right! No, no, I just blanked,” she quickly lied, giving the boy a broad grin, “I’m glad, though.”
“It’s only medication, dear.”
“Still,” (Y/n) reached up to cup Korekiyo’s cheek, “it’s good that you’re following through with your meds.”
“Your support always helps,” he pressed another kiss to the girl’s forehead, “We’ll be leaving early in the morning tomorrow, I should warn you,” at her furrowed brows he explained, “In order for us to catch the first train to Iwate prefecture. Did you forget, darling?”
“Wait, wait, let me guess…” she waited for his nod before tossing out her suggestion, “We’re traveling for field work!” she was then quick to tag on, “As a couple that’s, like, super in love?”
“You didn’t forget at all, my love,” Korekiyo pulled away slightly, and sat on the bed, removing his shoes, “You play that memory of yours down too much. You’re far more intelligent than you think.”
“You think that?”
“Of course, I do. It’s not just because I love you dearly, either. You mustn’t let the words and actions of others control your opinion on yourself - you’re better than they say.”
This is his ultimate fantasy. He’s her lover. They travel and see the beauty of humanity together, just like what he said he wanted. He loves her. He thinks she’s so great.
He’s wrong.
She should’ve stayed with him that night.
He’s wrong.
She could’ve done so much to keep him with her.
He’s dead.
Because she should’ve stayed.
“Kiyo,” her eyes burned and began to soak, “I’m sorry!” her lungs rapidly expanded and contracted with her sporadic breaths, her hands clutching at her shirt. Her knees finally buckled and she collapsed to the ground, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry for being a stupid, stupid, stupid failure! Please… forgive me…!”
Korekiyo immediately stood up and rushed to (Y/n)’s side, bringing her into a tight hug as she fell to the floor, his fingers running through her hair. He kisses at her temple and cheeks, waiting until her cries settle enough for him to be audible in the room, “It’s interesting, dear, I first realized I’d fallen in love with you in a situation similar as this. I desired to comfort and reassure you just as I do now. You’re not stupid nor a failure, and I adore you above all else.”
Shaking her head, (Y/n) only began to cry harder into Korekiyo’s chest. This could’ve been their future. This could’ve been what they had to share and hold between only each other. If she’d only stayed. If she’d been with him that night.
“Oh, my dear, I’m sorry for upsetting you.”
“It wasn’t you,” she clamped a hand over her mouth, trying to keep back her cries, “I- I- it’s all my fault… it’s all my fault…”
“You haven’t done anything wrong, darling,” Korekiyo held her tighter, “I love you, my dearest (Y/n). No matter what you’ve done, I will always forgive you.”
And once again, her tears only came out harder. Her head pounding ruthlessly at the ache and consciousness fading out in her exhaustion. Korekiyo was dead. And no amount of her tears could ever bring him back.
#korekiyo shinguji x reader#korekiyo x reader#shinguji x reader#drv3 x reader#he deserved so much better :(( i wuv him#let me know if i miss anything with the warnings
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Why Zhongli isn’t just a blockhead (though sometimes he is) – another essay by yours truly
Disclaimer beforehand: I am partly Asian, but I am not Chinese and as such don’t have a complete grasp on the richness of Chinese lore and history although I do try to keep on educating myself about it. If you see I made any mistakes, missed out on something very important or accidentally said something I shouldn’t have please don’t hesitate to point it out for me, I’d really appreciate it. This analysis was mostly for myself and because I wanted to set a few things right about some things I’ve seen and encountered about his character in the fandom, that is all.
This analysis ended up to be quite long (over 1.3k words oops) despite me keeping some points out of it on purpose to make it more compact, but I hope you’ll enjoy my thoughts nonetheless!
- Zhongli is not, and has never been, simply a brute without a brain despite his undeniable trail of destruction left in the wake of the Archon war – everything he’s done, as immoral as it may seem to humans, has been done with the image of a more peaceful future in mind and the wish to create a better world for those inhabiting it.
- And let’s not forget that he is extremely cunning and always waging decisions carefully considering he has planned out such a grand scheme from faking his death to implementing Childe in this game of his, and using everyone in Liyue for his grand, final test
- though he did not do so without a thinking about the weight such a final decision would hold, but instead hought long and hard about it through observations of Liyue’s people and how they would fare without his divine intervention from now on.
- Zhongli is without a doubt not a 110% good character, he is indeed manipulative, irrational and inconsiderate of individual human lives to a certain degree and I won’t say that his objectives erase the way of his methods, after all everyone knows that the path to hell is paved by good intentions-
- but it’s simply impossible to define any character in Genshin in such black and white/ good and bad ways because each and every of his decisions is very nuanced - he is not only selfish, Zhongli is also incredibly selfless at the same time because all that he did was for the people of Liyue, he gains literally nothing from all this apart from his rest from his immortal duties, and he is not heartless either because despite making just yet seemingly cold decisions it also has to be said that such hard decisions cannot be made and set in stone when one let’s themselves swayed by emotions
- To come to another point: After living so far off from the mortal world for so long – because watching over humans isn’t the same as wandering amongst and living with them – it is no surprise he is quite detached from them, his heart despite his love for Liyue having petrified little by little and he knows it.
- Yes, Zhongli definitely knows he can’t escape eventual erosion, petrifying little by little, that he will wear away as a river wears away a mountain - but still he lives on to uphold the memory of those that have faded to dust, had sacrificed their very lives to help pave the way for a peaceful and prosperous Liyue and also to carry the weight of sins he has committed in the war – he thinks and he cares so, so much and to conclude this:
- I literally cannot stress enough how he carries so much responsibility, so much history on his shoulders – he is living history – even more now that he’s the only one left to carry on the hopes and dreams who have long passed and that this is an incredibly lonely task. It’s just heart-breaking to think about what he’s carrying with him day by day.
- And to come to one of the most important people from his long life and who helped to shape him into who he is now: Guizhong.
- She was one of the people who taught him that his heart is capable of more than just living for his duty, that he doesn’t only have to live as the God of Martial Arts – they were not just ‘brawns and brain’ – they were a team that complemented and completed each other
- and Guizhong (and consequently her death as well) pushed him to embracer the other sides of his personality as well. It doesn’t matter whether people see their relationship as platonic or romantic, because the impact she has left on him is the same – as someone who believed in his gentler, more caring side
- Zhongli is also incredibly thoughtful and perceptive, seen in the way he talks - a very refined and elegant way with every word laced by the wisdom he has accumulated without it being overbearing or coming across as absolute with no room for doubts - about various important characters in Liyue right now – accurately pinpointing their strengths and weakness and how valuable they are to making the land he has protected for so long continue to prosper
- for example when he talks about the Yuheng and that despite, no, because of her abrasive attitude towards his deeds as a good she is a gem amongst humans and one of the many people he places their trust in to take care of Liyue’s future in his stead. Or Yanfei, the young half-Adepti who despite never having entered a contract with him, or rather doesn’t even know of his true identity upholds order and contracts within Liyue which he praises and values
- It shows how deeply he cares about this land and its people, believing in their strength to overcome everything even without him – which is one of his most defining traits – seen in the way he has guided humanity all these years and in the way the people of Liyue have faith in him, a faith that isn’t blind or caused by fear like with Decarabian, but true respect for all he has done for the people of this land.
- to say he’s a blockhead who doesn’t think nor care about humans is completely wrong because his entire rule for the past millennia was centered around protecting mankind – yes, it has to be said that his methods and morals are outside normal human values but it has to be kept in mind that he is an immortal god and gods neither feel nor live like humans, they understand and perceive the world differently than humans
- gods stand outside out world and that makes it harder for them to truly connect with the way humans live - and it is only after stepping down from his throne that he actually has the chance now to try and experience the life of mortals for himself, to see and live it for himself and not as the distant overseer that Rex Lapis was.
- and while he may feel sadness over not being needed anymore, giving up his godhood is the freedom he chose for himself, it’s something he deserves after watching over mankind for so long and trying to keep balance between the world or mortals and supernatural being
- being free, being allowed to be selfish and think of himself outside of being a god is something he’d never done before being so incredibly bound to duty, contracts and traditions as he is; but by now he truly believes that this is the age of men as the end of the age of gods is coming to its end and it’s a beautiful thing to see him grow beyond the boundaries he had set for himself the past thousands of years
- though in all fairness, sometimes our beloved Ex-Archon can indeed be a little of a blockhead considering he dumped the entire world of Teyvat into a financial crisis by stopping the production of one of the most important catalysts for everyday life – something that may not unfold its consequences immediately of course
- – and even forgot to lay aside a private fund of mora but that’s because he isn’t accustomed to normal human life at all, he is still learning and more than willing to expand his horizon despite the vast knowledge he’s already accumulated over years of his life – and in the end that’s what makes him such a brilliantly lovable man, am I right?
#zhongli#rex lapis#genshin zhongli#character analysis#i have so many thoughts about zhongli#good and bad ones and this was such a ride to write#i hope i did him justice#im literally sweating rn because of how afraid i am#genshin impact
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Pillowtalk
Summary: Dearest @thewalkingdead-imagines requested a fic with prompts “You’re just a softie.” and “You took all the pillows so I’m using you as one.” So it’s basically a piece of fluff. Hope you enjoy!
Pairings: Negan x Reader
Warnings: Swearing, mentions of sex, slight touching, Negan being Negan
Recently it’s been very busy for you and Negan. After taking over a new place with your boyfriend your quality time starts to get lessen. Forming a new authority was hard and keeping people in line was harder.
The Sanctuary had ruled by a horrible excuse of a man for a long time. When you and your boyfriend Negan came across the place you two thought maybe you finally found your permanent home. All of your old groups had been slaughtered but you two managed to survive.
At first, everything seemed okay with your new home. Negan was working right under the leader. He charmed the douche in such a short time. After all Negan was a born-ready leader and sharp.
But things started getting weird after a month or so. Several disgusting incidents as rape and physical abuse took place and that shit excuse of a leader just gave the people who’s been abused a pep talk about how they must protect themselves.
Not too long after the events, you and Negan started to spend long nights over discussing how you can discard the leader and take charge. No one deserved this bad treatment even if it’s apocalypse.
So, that was how you had taken over the position as leaders. Negan was proud to lead with you along his side. Things were getting better, but the leadership also brought long working hours and frequent runs to turn this place into a proper and safe one.
Negan has been gone for two days with a few men, they were looking for supplies and trustworthy people to bring back. The Sanctuary had its resident but with the new changes Negan found himself in need of more people.
You huffed as you finished your work at the inventory. You took the job of finding people, especially women, a job. That misogynistic asshole considered women nothing but a doormat. So, you paid extreme attention to give everyone a fair and suitable job.
Feeling tired and hungry you took faster steps to your room, smiling and having a small talk with people on the way. You were content with the things.
There was one thing which bothers you. After becoming the leader, Negan became the new attraction of some single women. They tried to threw themselves at him repeatedly, but he brushed them off instantly, though it did nothing to lessen your jealousy.
Just as you reached the door one of your assistants came next to you, she seemed out of breath.
‘Y/N, they’re back.’ She said with a cheerful tone.
Knowing Jane, you knew what she was talking about. Her husband was Negan’s right hand man Simon, so it was no surprise that she looks over the moon.
Despite all of your exhaustion, you immediately started toward downstairs. You and Negan has been together for a year now, but the time did nothing to appease your love and respect for each other.
Just as you stepped out of the gates, you met with a pair of familiar hazel eyes. Without giving a thought you just jumped into your lover’s arms.
Negan let out an amused chuckle. His deep voice rumbled through your ears. This man made you nothing but crazy for himself.
‘Fuck! Somebody’s missed me.’ Negan kissed your jaw, starting his way down to your neck.
‘Shut up. As you wouldn’t miss me if I go away for days.’ You nudged your nose along his.
‘Bold of you to assume that I’d leave you alone babe. You know me, I would get so lonely; especially at night.’ He smirked mischievously.
‘You horny bastard. Here I thought my boyfriend would be too sad staying without me.’ You feigned a hurt expression.
‘Sweetheart, you know what I mean. Also, you fucking know well that me and my dick don’t do fine without your smoking hot body.’ He grabbed your ass, making a scene for everyone without giving a damn.
‘Negan!’ you tried pushing him but ending up bursting into giggles.
After some more dallying with each other you finally decided to go back to your room so you can have some rest.
Along the way you came across Sherry, she was one of the women who tried getting into your boyfriend’s pants.
‘Oh, Negan. You’re back safe and sound. Thank God.’ She said with a sickeningly sweet tone.
‘Fuck yeah, I mean I’m invincible and my girl knows how strong I am.’ He bit his bottom lip teasingly. You know Negan was just fucking with her. He was well aware of the fact that his recent position piqued interest of some women and he made it his mission to mock them, repeatedly.
Although Negan was handling himself well you couldn’t help your jealousy. Negan’s been always a handsome man and now with being in charge his admirers started to increase. They weren’t getting the fact that he’s taken. No matter how hard he tries.
Putting an annoying smile on your face you cleared your throat before speaking. ‘Babe, do you mind reminding me how strong you are?’ You stood on your toes and bit his earlobe. ‘I might be forgetting it. You being gone and me being lonely…’ You put your hand on his chest, slightly fisting his white t-shirt to feel his toned body.
Negan didn’t even try to hold his growl back. ‘As you can fucking see I’m busy as shit right now, need to take care of my girl. So, have a nice day Shirley.’ Negan walked away nonchalantly but you failed at holding your laugh as you saw Sherry’s face when Negan called her Shirley.
When you reached to your room Negan let himself down on the bed. He was clearly exhausted and sleepy as fuck.
‘Doll, as much as I’d like to fuck your brains out for hours daddy needs his fucking beauty sleep. So, take of your clothes and lie down with me.’ He looked at you with his pleading puppy eyes.
Honestly, you were in no state to decline his offer since you too were exhausted as fuck, but his puppy eyes also made your heart flutter. ‘I lay with you if you take your shirt off.’
‘Dirty girl, never failing to amaze me.’ He bit his lower lip while chuckling. Started getting out of his shirt slowly, giving you a funny show.
You giggled loudly. ‘You know what Negan? You’d suck as a stripper.’ You straddled his hips.
‘Now why would you fucking say that and hurt my feelings baby doll?’ He faked a pout.
‘C’mon big boy, I need sleep as much as you. I’ve been working off my ass for all day.’ You hit him back to bed and put your head on his chest, playing with short curls on his chest.
‘Mmh. I’m gonna fucking remind you how talented I am with my dick and moves, after I fucking sleep.’ He mumbled sleepily and drifted off to sleep shortly after.
You felt a movement behind you and stirred. Your body was protesting for you to go back to sleep.
‘Fuck!’ you let out a yawn and turned around. You found yourself sprawled out on Negan.
‘What the hell Negan?’ you whined sleepily.
‘Doll, I don’t know if you fucking notice, but you’re using me as your own pillow.’ He huffed.
You raised your head with an annoying expression on your face. ‘Oh, pardon me mister. You took all the pillows so I’m using you as one.’ You stated as a matter of fact.
‘You’re lucky you’re fucking cute, lie down baby.’ He muttered in a loving voice.
‘Did you seriously wake me up for that and now you’re telling me to continue using you as my fucking personal pillow?’ You hissed, getting interrupted while sleeping is one of the things you despised the most.
‘Babe, c’mon let’s go back to sleep and after that we can make sweet love.’ He begged with his eyes closed.
‘What? You, Negan, are going to make love to me? You’re just a softie.’ You let out a laugh.
‘Don’t tempt me little girl.’ He tried to sound stern as possible, but the exhaustion was clear in his deep tone.
‘Oh, what would you fucking do, daddy?’
In an instant he flipped you over and now standing between your legs, thrusting into your pelvis slowly.
You couldn’t help but let out a satisfied moan.
‘What were you saying baby girl?’ He chuckled with an erotic undertone in his voice.
‘Fuck! Negan, stop teasing and get into it!’ You started grinding yourself on him.
You aren’t getting any sleep tonight.
@negans-network
#negan#negan x reader#negan-network#jeffrey dean morgan#jdm#twd#the walking dead#twd negan#negan fluff#negan smut#negan fanfiction
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Possession 14
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This one is so long!! The next one will be the finale. This one has a trigger warning for crude remarks of a sexual nature to incite anger and violence, but it's nothing above a PG13 rating. And we finally get some hot cinnamon fluff, as spicy as I go lol
~~~~
Nothing in the short span of Nikola’s memorable life was harder than trying to keep a platonic distance between her and Gally. All that went through her head was that determined look on his face and the words ‘I’m yours’ passing his lips. She knew what he meant really amounted to ‘I’m your friend’, but ‘I’m yours’ just sounded so good.
Even though Alby had been helpful when Shawn had pulled his stunt, Nikola started to feel some negativity toward him, somehow blaming only him for the rule about belonging. Who had the right to dictate who one could and couldn’t belong to? She was also plenty mad at Shawn too for a lot more.
There was one day where she was thoroughly distracted though, her thoughts were far away from Alby and Shawn, and even Gally was pushed back ever so slightly. One of the goats had given birth but didn’t survive it. Nikola was caring for the orphaned kid and received much needed help and support from the dog cleverly named Bark. Honestly, boys had no imagination.
Winston had said that taking care of the kid was more trouble than it was worth, that he could put a quick and painless end to it, and Nikola was horrified.
“If you take that attitude with poor baby animals you’ll soon be taking it with human beings,” she had told him. “And the last thing we need inside the glade is people acting like the ones who sent us here.”
That had shut him up right quick, in fact, he got quite contemplative about his role as a slicer after that. He must have told others about it because soon some of the other boys were coming to check on the goat or offering to watch it while she tended to other things she needed to do. It was a positive turn on things in the glade and her position in their little world. Maybe she had gained some respect, maybe she had become more than an object in some of their minds and achieved real human status.
Either way, it lulled her into a place of comfort where she never would have guessed what was about to happen.
As she sat in the grass watching Bark be the little goat’s cheerleader as it took wobbly steps around the meadow, a shadow loomed over her. She looked up, hoping to see Gally, but she already had a bad feeling in her gut.
Shawn stood over her, hands stuffed in his pockets and looking out over the meadow as well. She didn’t say anything to him, just stared and waited a moment for him to say something. When he remained silent she turned back to what she was doing even though turning her back on him made her feel nervous. Still, she tried not to show fear.
“You don’t like me very much,” he finally stated.
“Have you given me a reason to like you?” she responded, not looking at him still.
“But you didn’t even like me before I did… that,” he pointed out, meaning the stunt he pulled trying to get her and Gally in trouble.
“That’s true,” she didn’t even lie. “And it turns out my gut was right.”
“Are you sure it wasn’t because you already liked someone else? Liked them more than you should?”
Nikola felt a confrontational spirit overtake her body and she whirled around to look at him, to let fly some angry words, but he had turned and started walking off before she could get one of them off her tongue. Somehow he wasn’t worth chasing down, but what he said bothered her long after he was gone.
~~~~
Gally was in the deadheads, collecting wood again. Nikola had been so enamored with caring for the kid and so many boys had gotten on board with being a bit more empathetic that Gally thought he would build something where any other pregnant animals could safely and comfortably give birth and care for their little ones.
Really though, Winston had told him and some of the others what she had said to him and Gally took it to heart as many of the others had as well. They did not want to have anything in common with the people who sent them there. And the only proper role model was bright, hopeful, empathetic Nikola.
As Gally’s thoughts wandered around the subject of her he wandered farther into the deadheads, not noticing how he was getting farther from the other builders out there with him.
He was imagining a house he would build by the ocean, a white house made of good wood with a proper door and windows and roof. He’d build it for Nikola and she deserved the best. Of course, in his imagination they lived in it together. They would stroll along the beach, hand in hand, with no one to cause them problems, and when they were done they’d return to their safe, warm house. There would be no glade, no maze, no wicked. Just them and peace.
“Oh Gally, Gally, Gally,” someone sighed, breaking him out of his daydreams.
He looked over and noticed Shawn with two other baggers and his guts tied themselves in knots. He was there to cause trouble again. This time Alby and Newt weren’t around, they were secluded, which probably meant they were going to attempt to beat the shuck out of him he guessed.
With a sigh of his own Gally tossed aside the wood he had collected and brushed the dirt off his hands. He was almost glad to have an opportunity to cause Shawn physical pain. He stared the other boy down in silence just waiting for a reason.
Shawn wasn’t much of a fan of Gally and Nikola’s tendency to hold their tongues, a talent he himself did not possess. Shawn glanced down with a slight chuckle, shaking his head at the ridiculous situation.
“I don’t get it,” Shawn said to Gally with fake sincerity. “Maybe you can explain it to me, help me understand. How did you get Nikola to like you so much?”
Gally crossed his arms and didn’t respond to the obviously rhetorical question.
“I mean, you’re one of the ugliest shanks here,” Shawn said, unable to hold back his malicious grin while his friends chuckled behind him.
Gally wouldn’t be provoked by simple insults.
“No one here really likes you. You’re a bossy, demanding, control freak who can’t take a joke and thinks he’s smarter than everyone else,” Shawn went on eyeing Gally up for his reaction to that. The fair and freckled builder had not turned even the slightest shade of red, which made Shawn switch up his tactic. “Nikola is nothing like you. She likes to put on her mask and seem tough, but, ooh… she is soft. Isn’t she?”
Shawn had stepped up to Gally and spoke softer, laying it on thick. “Is she soft Gally? Do you even know? I bet she is under all those clothes, soft enough to sink your teeth into,” Shawn smiled when a crimson shade started blooming behind Gally’s unmoved expression. He was getting on the right track now. “I want to take a bite so bad, you know? I bet she tastes so good, even down to her p-“
Gally’s hands shot out and grabbed the front of his shirt, almost yanking him off his feet. Shawn wanted Gally to land the first blow and he was close, but no cigar.
“Is there a point to all this?” Gally asked, shoving Shawn away from him.
“I’m just making conversation on our common interest,” Shawn said holding his hands up. “You know what I mean, right? You’ve thought about it, don’t try to tell me you haven’t.”
Shawn and his goons laughed but Gally didn’t react. He suddenly felt bad that he’d in fact had thoughts about Nikola that were less than platonic, but not nearly as skeevy as what Shaw was getting at.
“But there’s something serious I want to ask you, big guy, did you really get in there? Because I’m just wondering how loose things are going to be when I get to her-“
And thats when Gally’s fist connected with his skull. Shawn was knocked to the ground with unpredicted force, but Gally was instantly over him trying to haul him back up by the front of his shirt as the other boys came to Shawn’s defense. They tried to separate them, the whole idea was to get Gally put in the pit or banished for harming another glader, then the biggest obstacle between Shawn and Nikola would be gone.
Gally was so angry he could hardly be restrained even as he was outnumbered. He managed to get Shawn back up on his feet, hands still gripping his shirt even as the other boys tried to gain control over his arms. He couldn’t get another punch in this way so he did what he could and smashed Shawn’s nose with his forehead.
Shawn flew back with a cry of pain as he held his nose, launched out of Gally’s grip. He could barely keep his watering eyes open but he managed to throw a punch and land it on Gally’s face as the others held him back as best they could.
“I thought he was just supposed to hit you?” One of the boys questioned.
“Shuck that,” Shawn growled as blood and tears streamed down his face. “He’s getting what he deserves.”
With his brute strength alone, Gally made quite an impressive stand for as long as he could, but three against one were never favorable odds. No one was walking away from the encounter without injury, but Gally was taking the brunt of it as it went on. He didn’t care, he’d rather be their target than Nikola. He’d take as many punches as he had to for her.
“Gally!”
‘Oh. Oh God no,’ Gally thought as his guts plummeted even as he was kicked in the ribs. He hoped it was brain damage and not that Nikola was actually there.
Shawn looked behind him, moving enough to expose Nikola standing there in the deadheads with a look of horror on her face.
‘Run!’ Gally begged her in his mind as he spat blood from his mouth and fought to catch his breath.
Shawn sprinted for her and she turned to run, half a cry for help passing her lips before Shawn clamped his hand over her mouth and wrapped his other arm tightly around her. She kicked, thrashed and struggled so hard it made Gally proud of her as he tried to summon all his strength to get up and defend her. He knocked the legs out of under one boy and tried to get to his own feet. The other boy tackled him back down to the ground and soon enough the first one assisted in weighing him down.
She really was giving Shawn a run for his money and almost slipped out of his grip when she bucked and then went dead weight. He managed to grab her pony tail and wrap it around his hand so she couldn’t pull free. His other hand had slipped from her mouth for a moment and she did her best to scream again but Shawn’s hand slapped across her mouth again as he kept her low to the ground by her hair.
“Shut up, you stupid- Ah!” Shawn was the one screaming now, a long, loud, sustained cry of pain that alerted the glade as well as anything Nikola could have produced herself.
Gally tried to see what was going on and could only gather that his hand was still near her mouth. He couldn’t take her being in danger, he had to do something, he had to get to her, he promised he’d protect her. Pure adrenaline, fear, and something else coursed through his system and he forced himself to ignore the pain. He pushed himself up with a yell of exertion and managed to elbow one boy in the jaw hard. Gally rolled over on the other boy and elbowed him hard in the side before he tried getting up as quickly as possible. It was hard, too hard and would take too long so he tried to army crawl away and hopefully he’d work his feet back under himself as he went.
But help had finally arrived. There were so many boys around Shawn and Nikola now, all clamoring over the sustained sound of Shawn’s wounded wails. Some other boys broke away and grabbed up the ones that had held Gally down. Alby, Clint, and Jeff were towing Shawn away already and then Nikola was pushing her way through Newt and Minho who were trying to see if she was ok. She sprinted over to where Gally had finally gotten up on his hands and knees and fell to her own in front of him.
“Gally! Oh my god,” her voice shook as much as her hands as they gently took him by the shoulders. “Is anything broken?”
He managed to push himself up onto his knees and sit back on his heels. He finally got a good look at her and saw a bruise already forming next to her eye and blood around her mouth.
“Are you ok?” He asked her, looking at the blood with concern, reaching up and touching her chin.
“I’m fine,” she shook her head, impatient to find out if he was ok. “It’s Shawn’s, I bit him.”
“You bit him?” Gally repeated sounding amused as a smile tugged his split lip painfully.
“I’ve never seen him smile after getting his ass kicked,” Newt said with concern as he knelt beside Nikola in front of Gally.
“I’ve never seen him get his ass kicked,” Minho mumbled as he stood behind them.
“We should get him to the infirmary,” Newt said which Nikola whole heartedly agreed with.
“But Shawn is in there now getting put back together, probably gonna be a while since you practically degloved his finger,” Minho pointed out.
“You did?” Gally panted, impressed.
“No, and that’s not important right now,” she said agitatedly. “Can we help Gally, please?”
“I’m alright, I’m alright,” Gally waved them off as he tried to sit more comfortably.
“Uh, no. You’re not,” Nikola said as she gently placed her hand over his bruised and bloodied one.
“No broken legs, no broken arms,” Gally said before using his free hand to feel his abdomen. “And no broken ribs. I’ll be ok.”
“Gally,” Nikola started to complain, her eyes sadly staring deep into his. It made him feel better.
“What happened?” Newt asked him.
Gally sighed and tried to roll his eyes but it only made him feel dizzy. “Shawn came out here to get me alone and beat me up. As you can see.”
“He just came out here and started throwing punches?” Minho piped up.
“No,” Gally admitted as he looked down and brushed his thumb gently over Nikola’s fingers still resting on his hand. “He made me hit him first.”
“He made you,” Minho repeated incredulously.
“Yes, he did,” Gally said firmly as he looked up at Minho before glancing quickly but meaningfully at Nikola.
“What?” she asked softly. Of course she noticed, she hadn’t taken her eyes off him for a second, but now she slowly pulled her hand back. “It was because of me?”
“No, Nikola, it’s not your fault,” Gally tried to tell her, reaching out for her again.
“But it’s because of me,” she said more firmly as she got more upset.
“No,” Gally said even as her eyes got shiny and she got to her feet. “Nikola, wait.”
She took a few steps backwards and her hands covered her mouth before she turned a hurried off.
Gally gave an exasperated groan as he tried to get up on his feet to go after her.
“Hold on,” Newt said, halting him.
“No, I can’t let her think this is her fault,” Gally fought him weakly.
“I think she’ll live if you let her cry in peace for a moment, she’s processing what Shawn just did to her too,” Newt said.
“She shouldn’t be alone,” Gally argued with that too and Newt saw an unfamiliar emotion in his eyes, a concern bordering on desperate.
“I’ll keep an eye on her,” Minho said before sprinting off after her.
“He hurt her, he put his hands on her,” Gally said as dark anger covered up the raw and tender emotion that was there before, his eyes even took a glassy sheen that pooled but would not spill over his lower lashes.
“I know he did,” Newt assured him. “And he’s going to pay for it.”
~~~~
Eventually they moved Shawn out of the medhut even though he still needed attention, and Newt helped Gally there for his turn. He kept an eye out for Nikola all the way there and only gave in to his pathetic despair once the medhut door shut behind him. He lay with a heavy groan on the cot, gravity pulling a tear from the corner of his eye. He covered his eyes with one arm, even though it hurt to rest it over his bruised face, so neither medjack could see it.
“You put up a good fight,” Jeff said after checking him over. “Nothing too terrible here… hang tight for minute, ok?”
Gally just sighed as he heard the door close behind him, the chatter of the glade murmuring through the walls around him. He just thought about Nikola and the look on her face, how she screamed his name and tried to help him. He wanted to feel angry, angry at Shawn for laying a finger on her, wanted to shove him through the maze doors that very night, but all he felt was a sadness, deep and aching. He wanted to see Nikola and make sure she was ok.
The door opened and closed again with an extra thud and footsteps approached him. He didn’t move a muscle or give it a thought until he felt her hand on his again. He pulled his arm down and ignored the scream of his muscles and bruises as he pulled himself to a sitting position, swinging his legs over the side of cot.
“Nikola,” he breathed, all other speaking ability leaving his head as he looked at her sitting in front of him.
“Hey,” she said giving him an uncertain half smile. “The medjacks are short staffed today, so I’ll take care of you, if you don’t mind.”
“Of course I don’t,” he said, the very idea that he would mind was ridiculous.
Still he didn’t really know what to say to her as she started cleaning and bandaging his wounds starting with his hands. Her face was turned down as she focused on them and he watched her, feeling her gentle and caring touch on his large, rough hands. She was being more thorough and precise than Clint or Jeff had ever been.
After finishing his hands in silence she looked up at him for the first time since she came in, her eyes darting between each bruise and cut. Suddenly her chin was wobbling and the corners of her mouth turned down. In a matter of moments she was crying and he had no idea what to do. Her hands gently touched his face as she kept looking at his injuries.
“Look what they did to you,” she said quietly through the tears she was trying to hold back, leaning in closer to him. “I never wanted anyone to get hurt, but especially not you,” she said as the tears forced their way out, and then her arms gently wound themselves around his shoulders and tried to pull her closer to him.
It was too big of a stretch so she just moved herself right onto his lap, burying her face in his shoulder and crying. The pain left as his body became aware only of hers pressed against him. He rested his chin on her shoulder in return and carefully held her, feeling her there under his fingertips like a dream come to life.
She lifted her head, her sobs dying down and slowing altogether as she stayed there with her cheek against his. He dared not move, he wasn’t ready for the dream to end. She pulled back slowly, her cheek brushing his and then her nose as she turned her face. She was moving slowly, keeping her face close to his. Her nose brushed against his and he felt like his heart had caught flame and was whistling off like a firecracker. And when those soft, pink lips brushed over his, pressing a brief and gentle kiss there the firecracker exploded.
She pulled back to look at him, her red and puffy eyes taking him in. “You let me do that,” she observed, biting her lip to hold in a smile. “If you minded-“
“I would have said so,” he replied watching her look at him with as much tender adoration as he felt for her.
She smiled before she leaned in, carefully bringing her lips to his split and bruised mouth and he kissed her back this time, he didn’t care how much his lip hurt, it didn’t matter, it was nothing. She was everything. He brought a hand to her face as he felt one of hers on the back of his neck while the other slipped over his shoulder and down his chest. It slipped back up till both of her hands were cradling his neck as he kissed her again. They pulled away an inch or so and looked into each other’s eyes, his hand resting on her shoulder. He never wanted to let her go.
“I’ve wanted to do that for a while,” she admitted, bringing a bashful blush to his face. “But I didn’t know if you felt the same, or if you’d just settle for me since I’m the only girl around.”
He swallowed and tilted her chin back up to look at him. “You’re the best thing that will ever happen to me.”
That must have been the right answer because it brought on more tears and another kiss.
“Ok, let’s finish getting you taken care of,” Nikola sighed contentedly as she brushed his nose with hers once more, something she seemed to like doing, and reached for the first aid supplies from her spot on his lap.
“A little late for this question, but should we be worried about someone coming in here?” he asked, gently holding her around the waist.
“I locked the door,” she whispered in his ear as she leaned in to reach for something else.
He looked up at her in wonder as she took care of everything that ailed him, kissing each bandage and bruise, her little fingers tracing his features as she went along. He leaned in to each touch as he held her comfortingly on his lap, until he was treated. She hugged him, her hands rubbing his back soothingly until he couldn’t keep his eyes open any longer.
Masterlist
@frequentlychangingfandoms @quackquackbi @poulterjonas @crazysheeplyca @pre-google @gladerscake @neilox @thesuitkovian @carp3d1em @cottoncandy-dreamxd @emilyhadenbaker
#Possession gally fic#gally#tmr#maze runner#tmr gally#maze runner gally#gally imagine#gally fanfic#thirsting over gally's thick ankles#Will Poulter Protection Squad#will poulter
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Wish I Were Tohru
>>> a sohma yuki x reader <<<
genre: lil fluff, lil angst??
warnings: none
song: heather by conan gray
synopsis: you’ve been able to get close to the Sohma and become close friends with him. you have feelings for him, but you’re pretty sure he has feelings for Honda Tohru.
a/n: I love this boy and he needs love, I AM HERE TO SUPPLY LOVE 🥺❤️ honestly Yuki is my favorite from Fruits Basket, Haru being a close second and Kyo a close third!! I just don’t see enough Fruits Basket content on here so I thought maybe I’d make some, but this one is kinda shitty ngl. It was long but it just doesn’t feel like my best work. But, I’ve been working on this for a while, so I thought I’d post it anyway heh :)) I guess this means I officially write for Fruits Basket now!!!
It all started the 3rd of December, when your feelings for Yuki made themselves apparent. On that winter day, you were freezing because you weren’t wearing a warm enough coat and Yuki gave you his sweater while you two walked to school. Your cheeks warmed up quicker than the rest of your body as he smiled at you and wrapped his sweater around your shoulders. With a close-eyed smile, he warmly said that it looked better on you than it did on him; those words struck a cord in your heart, and from then on you accepted the fact that you had fallen for the boy who had become your closest friend.
Of course, you got shit for it from his fan club and they relayed all the rules of the fan club to you during lunch. But after that incident, some of the girls from the fan club began asking Yuki for his sweater, to which he shot them down nicely. That small action didn’t go unnoticed either, and made you feel like he only ever did that for you, and made you fall even harder for the Sohma.
It’s been months since that instance, and you haven’t said anything to him about your feelings because you didn’t want to look like another one of the girls from his fan club desperate for his attention and love. But, seeing as you two have grown closer and you’ve gained enough confidence to do something about your feelings, you decided yesterday that you would confess to him today.
You walk up to him in the hallway during passing period, slightly shaking from nerves, and get his attention by calling his name. He turns around and smiles at you, earning you a glare from the class president who was talking to him earlier.
“Oh, l/n-san, hello!” Yuki greets warmly.
“Hey Sohma-kun! Can I...” you start, but trail off as you see his eyes drift away from yours and land on someone behind you. You glance behind you and see Honda Tohru, your friend, walking down the hall with Uotani and Hanajima. When you look back at Yuki, you can see his eyes follow her figure as she passes, gazing softly. Seeing that makes your heart drop, along with your confidence level.
When he looks back at you, you shake out of your thoughts and quickly say, “uh, sorry, I meant to tell you I’m busy after school so I won’t be walking home with you guys today.”
A look of confusion crosses his features briefly, but is replaced with a smile as he answers with, “Oh, alright. I’ll let Honda-san know.”
You thank him with the best fake smile you can muster before quickly walking down the hall to your next class. When you’re far enough away, your smile drops, as does your gaze. You definitely took notice of how Yuki’s eyes seemed to brighten as he watched Tohru walk by, brighter than the blue sky. It was a look you were sure Yuki never bestowed upon you, but you understand why. Obviously, Tohru is very pretty; definitely a sight for sore eyes. She’s so kind and thoughtful, among other things, Her personality draws people to her, and you can understand why. And because you can understand why Yuki would gaze at her like that, your confidence plummeted and your confession got caught in your throat. But you didn’t want Yuki, Kyo, and Tohru to know your mood was gloomy, which is why you chose to walk home alone today.
They shouldn’t see you in such a down mood stemmed from jealousy; it’s not fair to them and it would only make you as mature as his fangirls. Jealousy is not a flattering color, after all.
On your walk home, the moment replayed in your head. Your brain kept trying to pick apart his facial expression, hoping to find some solace in the evidence of a misunderstanding. Finding optimism in the hopes of a misunderstanding, you walk along the street with your head held high, deciding to try again tomorrow.
.
.
But, oh how unfortunate you’d be this week.
The next morning, there’s news of chilly weather for the rest of the week, right when it was starting to warm up a little. It doesn’t matter much to you, seeing as you grab a nice coat this time to keep you warm. You walk out the door and see Yuki and Kyo standing in front of your house, waiting for you to join them on the walk to school. Their attention turns to you as you approach them, and they greet you. As you greet them back, Kyo shifts his stance a little to reveal Tohru standing behind him with a smile on her face...and Yuki’s sweater pulled over her uniform. The same sweater he had given you to wear in December. The sweater you thought he had only given you to wear.
And yet again, your confidence plummets into the floor. All you can do to keep your mood seemingly high is smile and remain silent on your walk to school. Yuki and Tohru are caught in a conversation the entire way, which Kyo sometimes comments on, but Kyo notices how quiet you’ve gotten and how you won’t make eye contact with any of them. He ruffles your hair, causing you to look up at him in surprise because he doesn’t do that unless he’s trying to lift your spirits.
“Do you wanna...talk after school?” He asks, turning his head away from you.
You smile, knowing he’s trying to give you support. Kyo was always like that; he does care a lot, but he doesn’t always know how to show it.
“Yes, thanks Kyo-kun.”
.
.
“Alright, spit it out.” Kyo says, leaning against the wall.
You sigh, turning your gaze to the ground as you try to explain everything to him. It all sounds really stupid to you when you say it out loud, like it’s not a big deal...but it feels like one. It feels like he’s messing with your emotions, but Yuki’s not the kind to do that intentionally. Once you’re done spilling your guts to Kyo, he continues to stare at the tree in front of him as your hands begin playing with the ends on your skirt.
“It’s stupid, I know. And it’s not like I hate Tohru-chan, I could never. She’s such an angel, I can understand why you’re both so drawn to her. In fact, it wouldn’t be surprising if Yuki was in love with her. I just...I wish...”
I wish I were Tohru.
That’s what you wanted to say. Jealously really is an ugly shade.
“Uhm, never mind, Kyo-kun! It’s nothing, I promise. I shouldn’t be complaining like this; I shouldn’t burden you with this nonsense, especially when it’s about someone you dislike.” You add quickly, concealing your true feelings with a close-eyed smile.
Kyo looks at you with wide eyes, surprised at your change of attitude. Sure, he doesn’t really care about anything that has to do with Yuki, but when it also concerns you, a close friend, he cares a lot. The fact that you tried to invalidate your feelings pisses him off, but he tries putting that aside as he faces your retreating form.
“W-Wait, y/n-”
“Uhm, let’s go Kyo-kun! I’m sure you don’t want to be here any longer than you already have to.” You smile at him, taking steps towards the school gates.
That fake happiness; the facade you’re hiding behind to mask your hurt feelings, it’s definitely becoming more transparent to Kyo as all the words you uttered about the issue swirl in his mind. If he’s being honest with himself, he’s at a loss for words. He’s never cared about Yuki or what’s going on in his life, so how can he possibly give advice on an issue concerning him?
As you both walk in silence in the direction of your homes, Kyo replays your words over and over in his head, trying to think of something to say to encourage you in some way.
“L-Listen, don’t give up so easily y/n! Just tell him how you feel, I mean you’ve come this far! You know how much I hate that rat, but he’s not...a bad guy. And if I’m wrong and he breaks your heart, I’ll break his stupid face for you!”
You look up at Kyo in surprise, cause you know that must’ve taken a lot out of him to say something semi-nice about Yuki. He doesn’t dare make eye contact; his head faces away from you as his shoulders tense and he balls his fists. Something about how reluctant he is to admit it makes you laugh, and your laugh causes his eyes to widen as he looks at you.
“What? Are you laughing at me?!” He exclaims.
You shake your head with a soft smile on your face, a genuine smile.
“Nope, nothing of the sort. Thanks Kyo-kun, I won’t give up on my confession! Yuki and I planned a study session for tomorrow, so I’ll plan to confess to him then!”
“Good.”
.
.
After you changed out of your uniform at home, you set off for the Sohma residence. It’s not a long walk from your house to Yuki’s, so you slow your pace a bit to take in the scenery and steel your nerves.
After talking with Kyo yesterday, you hadn’t exactly figured out how you were going to tell him, or even when. Lucky for you, the study session you both had planned a week ago was an early one; close to right after school, maybe about an hour or two off?
After trekking up those myriad stone steps, you knock on the door of the Sohma residence. After a couple seconds, you hear Shigure’s voice on the other side of the door as he slides it open.
“Ah, y/n-chan! Hello!” Shigure greets with a smile.
“Hi Shigure-san, is Sohma-kun here?” You ask, smiling back at him.
“Oh, Yuki-kun? He’s been gone for about an hour or so with Tohru-chan. I’m not sure when he’ll be back, but would you like to wait for him here?”
Oh. He’s out with Tohru. Even though you guys had plans. It’s likely that he forgot, but it’s not like you guys made these plans a while ago; it’s been a week!
Your smile falters a bit, but remains on your face as you answer Shigure with, “Oh, I see. Thank you for offering, but I think I’m just going to head home then! Have a good day, Shigure-san!”
You bow to him before turning around and stopping in your tracks. At the top of the steps stands Kyo, staring at you with confusion written all over his face. You walk up to him and smile before trying to walk past him.
“Wait, y/n, what happened? I thought you and the rat were studying today.” Kyo asks, causing you to halt.
You bite your lip, swallowing your emotions, before turning back to Kyo with a pained smile and answering with, “He’s out with Tohru-chan right now. It’s fine, he probably just forgot. I’m just, uh, gonna head home now. I’ll see you tomorrow, Kyo-kun!”
Kyo stands there in disbelief as he watches you walk down the steps. He’s pissed now; after he admitted the rat wasn’t a bad guy, he does something like this. To his close friend, of all people! Don’t you mean more to the rat than anyone else?
Kyo grits his teeth as he runs to the house to ask Shigure where Yuki and Tohru are. Shigure gives him the vague answer of a certain shopping district across the city, and Kyo sets out to find Yuki to set him straight. The image of your sadness seeping into your smile is burned in Kyo’s mind, making him even more upset.
Kyo makes it to the shopping district about a half hour later, running from shop to shop. He asks store clerks if they’ve seen anyone matching the descriptions of Yuki and Tohru, but each one says they haven’t. Hours pass before Kyo approaches the last store and sees the silver-haired male standing outside with Tohru by his side, looking like they’re having a grand time. Kyo runs up to the two and grabs Yuki by the collar of his shirt, causing Yuki to stare at him in surprise and annoyance.
“You stupid rat! How thoughtless are you?!” Kyo starts, tightening his grip on his shirt.
“Let go of me, stupid cat.” Yuki deadpans.
“Does y/n mean nothing to you?! How dare you treat her like trash!”
“What are you talking about?!”
“You ditched your study session with her today to go out with Tohru! Do you enjoy hurting her or something?! Cause you seem to be doing that a lot lately! Do you not care about her?! If you don’t, then why don’t you just say it to her face instead of making her sad every day!”
Yuki’s eyes widen as realization hits; he totally forgot about the plans he made with you today. The guilt he feels outweighs the anger swirling in his chest every time Kyo accuses him of not caring about you. He pushes Kyo off of him and hands Tohru the bags in his hands, all except for one.
“I’m sorry, Honda-san! I have to go!” Yuki apologizes quickly before sprinting out of the shopping district.
Yuki scolds himself for being oblivious to your feelings as he runs down seemingly endless streets. Yuki always cared for you; you were the one close friend he had before Tohru came into his life. Lately he’s noticed that thoughts of you are all that consume his mind at night, and the way he feels different around you than around anyone else. But, our poor Yuki has never felt this way before; he doesn’t know why he feels like this or what to do about it.
But when he heard that he forgot about his plans he made with you, and how that hurt you, he felt like the lowest of the low. How could he skip out on plans with you? How could he hurt you?
The sun begins to set as more tears adorn your notes. You weren’t really sure why you were so upset; it’s okay that Yuki is happy with Tohru. It’s not even a big deal that he forgot about your plans...so why did it hurt most to think he forgot about you? All these doubts begin swarming your head, causing more tears to fall, as you hear knocks on the front door.
You quickly wipe the falling tears as you walk to the door, trying to compose yourself for whichever visitor stood at your door. Your eyes widen as you open the door to see a heavily panting Yuki standing in front of you. You quickly plaster a smile on your face as you attempt to greet him.
“Sohma-kun? Are you alright? What are you doing here?”
“l/n-san, I’m so sorry! I completely forgot about our plans today and went shopping with Honda-san. I never meant to make you sad, I just-”
“Yuki-kun, can we...talk? Somewhere else? Let’s, uhm, go for a walk real quick.”
You grab a pair of slip-ons by the door and head outside, leading Yuki to a nearby kid’s playground. You both sit on the swings and silence envelopes you two as you gather your thoughts. Yuki stares at you as you stare at the ground, waiting for you to scold him or do anything to let him know you were fine.
“Yuki-kun...I still remember the third of December; me in your sweater, you said it looked better on me than it did you. Only if you knew...how much I liked you. How much I still like you. I remember how every girl from your fan club asked you for your sweatshirt, and how I felt special when you turned them down. But, I’ve seen the way you look at Tohru-chan when she walks by. And I get it, Tohru-chan is very beautiful. What a sight for sore eyes, brighter than a blue sky. And I’ve been noticing lately how your gaze on her lingers, and how your face softens when you speak to her. You gave her your sweater to wear, too...not that it matters, I guess. Anyway, as my feelings for you continue to grow, I begin to see...and understand, how and why you like Tohru-chan so much. I mean, she’s an angel! She’s so kind, thoughtful, and caring...I understand why you’d want her. And why you wouldn’t want me. I mean, why would you ever kiss me? I’m not even half as pretty. You gave her your sweater; it’s just polyester. But, you like her better. And I’m able to accept that, as long as you’re happy, Yuki-kun! I just...sometimes...I wish I were Tohru-chan.”
Yuki stares at you in disbelief as you continue staring at your feet, a single tear falling from your eye. He really is oblivious. His brain can’t even begin to compute the misunderstanding going on here. After all, he has feelings for you too. So, just how did it end up so bad, he wonders. He finds it so hard to believe you reciprocate his feelings, and that while trying to find a way to confess to you, he was hurting you instead.
“I-I love you, Yuki-ku-”
Yuki’s body moves as if on instinct, kneeling in front of you with his hands caressing the sides of your face. He smashes his lips against yours, only realizing what he’s doing once he feels you kiss him back. He pulls away almost as quickly as he placed his lips on yours, a blush creeping onto his face. You stare at him with wide eyes as he collects his composure and wipes a stray tear from your eye.
“l/n-san, I...I love you, too. What you saw between Honda-san and I is a big misunderstanding, and I’m sorry not seeing how I was hurting you. I’ve been spending more time with Honda-san this past week because she was helping me figure out a way to confess to you. Shigure suggested making you jealous like the love interests in his romance novels, and I honestly don’t know why I listened to him; I knew it was a terrible idea. But, that’s why Honda-san was wearing my sweater yesterday. When I thought that didn’t work, Honda-san suggested getting you a gift, which is why we went shopping today. I was so caught up in trying to make you happy that I forgot we made plans today. And instead of making you happy, I made you cry. Love isn’t really a feeling I’m fond of; I’ve never really experienced feelings this intense before. It took me a while to realize you were the reason my heartbeat quickened; why my stomach did flips, why warmth would spread in my chest. But when I found myself wanting to be with you every waking hour, I panicked. Truth be told, you’re the person I hold closest to my heart. I don’t let people in...from experience. There’s so much darkness that doesn’t reach the surface, so many things I can’t say just yet. But I will tell you in time, because you’re the person I trust most, and I’m learning slowly how to let people in. In the meantime, the one thing I can say with certainty, is that I love you...and I want to make you happy, if you’ll let me.”
Yuki takes your hands in his and smiles warmly at you. Worried that words will fail you, you nod with a grin on your face. The night air sends chills down your spine as you gaze happily at the boy in front of you. Yuki takes notice of the goosebumps rising on your skin and smirks a little, pulling his hands away from yours to grab the bag on the ground next to him.
He hands it to you while saying, “I have a feeling this’ll come in handy right about now.”
You take the bag from his hands and open it, revealing a familiar sweater. You press it against your chest, smiling at Yuki. You look down at his sweater and realize he's wearing the same one; he got you a matching sweater.
“You just looked so cute when you wore mine...” He smiles shyly, rubbing the back of his neck.
“I love it, Yuki-kun! Thank you!” You exclaim, throwing it on.
It was just polyester, but it now meant more to you than you thought it ever could.
#fruits basket#yuki sohma#yuki x reader#anime#fruits basket x reader#song fic#fruits basket one shot#kyo sohma#tohru honda#yuki sohma one shot#this is bad#fruits basket writing#heather by conan gray#rat boy is precious#he deserves love
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Star Wars Fun in the Sun Submission
This fic was written for @starwarsfandomfests “Summer Fun in the Sun” event. This event was really fun to participate in and I’m glad I joined in. I was given @anaisonfire to write for and chose to write some fluffy Jangobi for you with some bonding between Jango and the clones and Obi-Wan and young Boba. I hope you enjoy!
Find it on AO3 Here
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The sound of the waves lapping at the sand of the beach and the feeling of warm sunlight against his bare skin had Obi-Wan almost dozing in his chair. It had been so long since he could just relax like this and soak in the beauty and sensations of a place instead of worrying about an attack but the war was finally over. A lucky break had come from Fox who had nearly faceplanted onto the council room floor in a combination of his haste to speak with them and complete exhaustion. He had overheard a conversation between Dooku and Palpatine revealing his plans and had recorded it on his helmet cam, giving the Jedi evidence against the now exposed Sith Lord. Dechipping started as soon as they located what it was Palpatine was talking about and within the month, the head had been cut off the snake. Without Palpatine’s funding, a lot of previously Separatist worlds returned to the Republic begging for another chance. Dooku was backed into a corner and he knew it, so he had willingly turned himself into the Jedi council, giving up information on Grievous that led to his capture and the droid army’s shutdown. Things still weren’t perfect. The flaws of the Republic were more obvious than ever. The corruption ran deeper than before. The Clones still didn’t have the rights they deserved.
“What has you frowning like that, cyare? We’re supposed to be on vacation.” Jango’s voice interrupted the downward turn his thoughts had taken and his lips turned up in a warm smile.
“Just thinking about the mess we are not supposed to be thinking about while here. The usual.” He said and Jango snorted when Obi-Wan looked over to soak in the sight of him. Despite seeing his face repeated a million times in the war, none looked quite as handsome as Jango’s own scarred appearance to him.
“That’s fair enough. I keep worrying about Boba.” Jango admitted looking out over where the 212th and 501st were all playing volleyball or splashing in the water or laying in chairs like Jango and Obi-Wan just soaking in the sun. Obi-Wan sighed. Boba was another issue they would have to figure out a solution to. Well, not Boba himself, but how to integrate him into the rest of the family.
“Where is he now?” Obi-Wan asked when he didn’t see the boy in question.
“Inside the hotel room moping. I left him some books to read that I thought he might like so hopefully he’s curled up with one of those at least. I wish I knew how to make it better. I suppose just time with the mind healers for all of us. Watching who he thought was me get their head cut off is not the sort of trauma that goes away in a few months.” Jango murmured rubbing his face and Obi-Wan reached out to squeeze his hand.
“I have to admit it was a big shock to all of us when Dooku revealed you were alive and that the person Mace killed had been one of the clones he had kept personally for purposes such as that. I’m just glad that you survived and that Boba had been able to be located and reunited with you.” He said seriously. Jango nodded.
“If Aurra weren’t already dead I’d kill her again for poisoning him to think I’d want him risking his life that way. I just want him happy and healthy.” He said, squeezing Obi-Wan’s hand back. The relationship that had somehow started between them, since Jango was recovered from where he had been imprisoned and had started helping fight for the clones and clean up the mess that he helped make, was the biggest surprise of all. Obi-Wan had always assumed that Jango was a cold heartless person to have made all the clones and treated them so indifferently, however he had realized that the opposite was in fact true. Jango cared greatly for the clones but he had been just as much a prisoner in Palpatine and Dooku’s schemes as they had and he had distanced himself to protect them from being targeted due to Dooku thinking he might use them against him. Finding out Jango had also been implanted with a rudimentary version of the chip also explained a few things and allowed him to be pardoned for the attempted hit on Padme. Of course, a lot of it was still on Jango’s shoulders and he was doing all he could to rectify his actions. Somehow in all the working together to help the clones, Obi-Wan and Jango had become close enough to the point that even Boba and Anakin had been calling them a couple behind their backs. Now they really were.
“Vacations don’t work well when we just lay around and let ourselves worry about things. How about we go join in on the death ball game the boys are playing instead?” He offered and Jango chuckled, kissing his cheek.
“That sounds like a great idea. Just don’t complain when my team crushes you.” He said getting up and waving over at Cody.
“Wait a minute! Cody is my commander! He’s going to be on my team!” Obi-Wan quickly hopped up to follow and get integrated into the teams. Obi-Wan ended up on Rex’s team while Jango had cockily gained Cody’s choice, Cody giving Obi-Wan a fake-apologetic smirk.
“You can’t even hold onto your lightsaber and you expect me to think you can keep a ball?” He teased with a lot of clones’ ‘ooo’s surrounding them.
“Oh it’s on now, my dear, you’ve made a grave mistake.” Obi-Wan had said, moving to huddle with his team. In the end, due to a non-Force use rule, the teams were evenly matched and the game never really got far in either team’s favor. They were all just having fun wrestling a ball from each other and trying to get it to the opposite team’s goal. Eventually, they all decided to split the difference and go change in Anakin’s room so he had to deal with all the sand instead of the losing team’s when they broke for lunch.
Jango managed to convince Boba to come out and join them for the meal and Obi-Wan smiled as the boy enthusiastically told his father about something he had been reading about snails. Seeing the difference in the way he acted when he had thought he lost his father compared to now was a shock. With Jango’s love and support, it was like looking at two different people. Although, the older bitter Boba was still in there and came out around the clones as shown when Cody sat beside Obi-Wan and started to chat causing Boba to quiet and withdraw.
“Can I go to the tide pools and look for the snails once we’re finished here, buir?” Boba asked and Jango nodded.
“Of course. Just be careful.” He agreed and Obi-Wan perked up at the perfect opportunity to try to bond a little with the boy.
“If you don’t mind, I’d love to come with you Boba. There are lots of little creatures there I’d like to see. Plus those bioluminescent snails sound really fascinating.” He said making sure to show he was listening to what Boba was saying by repeating some back.
“I guess it wouldn’t be bad to have you along. You can probably use your Force thingy to find them more easily.” Boba agreed after a moment of thought and Obi didn’t bother correcting him that the Force didn’t work that way. They quickly finished up the last of their meal and Boba led Obi-Wan towards the rocky area where the tide pools resided. Jango had declined in joining them with a knowing look at his Jedi and made an excuse of needing to call and check in on some work.
“Do you like ocean animals a lot, Boba?” He asked, trying to start a conversation to which the boy shrugged.
“I like all animals. There are so many planets with so many different ways for them to evolve and so many little differences even in species that are mostly the same. It’s cool to see what new things I can find out on each planet my buir and I visit. He used to make it a game we’d play together.” He admitted kicking a rock to splash into one of the little pools of water.
“Jango loves you a lot. You know that him helping the other clones doesn’t change his feelings about you, right?” Obi-Wan asked him and Boba grunted.
“I didn’t invite you to have you try to pick around in my brain. Now get to using your Jetii magics to find me some glowing snails or go back to making dopey looks at my dad and let me do my thing.” He grumbled and Obi-Wan rolled his eyes but did his best to feel around them to try to see if he could connect to any of the animals and figure out where the snails could be if they were even there at all.
While sensing the creature’s minds he felt them all diving deeper from what he figured was fear of the two humans encroaching on their homes however suddenly there was a faint rumbling and he gasped when Boba went barreling right into his stomach knocking him back into one of the ponds just in time to keep him from falling into a hole that opened up under where his feet had been.
Boba groaned as they both picked themselves up, equally soaked. “Dang it. Buir specifically told me not to fall in, now he’s going to laugh at me,” he whined.
“Thank you. I’m not even sure what just happened.” Obi-Wan confessed glad he had been in beachwear already, unlike Boba who was trying to wring out his t-shirt without removing it now.
“The rocks here aren’t round and solid like on most beaches. They’re flat and shift around with the tides as well like plates. It was in the book. The change in temperature at different points in the day causes the water currents to shift and then they move. I saw the fish diving and the rock around it start to move. I might not fully like you but my dad does, so letting you get trapped in a hole and drown seemed like the wrong move.” Boba said, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his shorts awkwardly.
“Well, I appreciate it nonetheless. It seems your extra reading saved my life.” He said with a chuckle, stroking his beard out of habit. “It would have been a shame to live through a whole war only to die to a little water and rock.” He said and Boba snorted but relaxed.
“The great Jedi General Obi-Wan Kenobi done-in by a change in tide while on vacation does sound like a great holonet headline.” He teased and they both continued their search for sea snails a little more carefully, eventually catching a few in a bucket to bring back and show Jango and the clones. Things weren’t perfect, but as Obi-Wan curled close to Jango’s warm chest that night, he found he was okay with that.
#Star wars summer fun in the sun#Star Wars#Jangobi#Jango Fett#Obi-Wan#Young Boba Fett#Marshal Commander Cody#The Clone Wars#Fandom Event#Fanfic#Fluff#my writing
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i’m gonna try out my luck for the renji bday thing😭
- renji being a mediator between rukia and ichika(idk why i feel like rukia and ichika would get into rly dumb arguments and just fight like they’re the same age)
- renji and ichika get a tattoo
- jealous rukia(of course)
- anything that takes place in inuzuri, i loved your ‘dumb teens stealing kisses’ snippet so much 😭
- more of the tattoo artist renji falls for a client AU
I hope you’ll forgive me for cheating a bit, but when I saw this, I said, “what if I just gave you more of the dumb teens stealing kisses” fic? because honestly, it’s just sitting here.
For people who don’t obsessively follow my incoherent ramblings about my own WIPs, this is an excerpt for i can’t believe i found you in that town, a story that takes place during Renji and Rukia’s last year in Inuzuri. Two out of their three friends have passed away, their powers are growing steadily stronger, and they are starting to face the fact that they aren’t children anymore. I have two more parts of Heart is a Muscle to get through first, so I never work on it, but it is very close to my heart.
PS: This is not going on ao3 at this time, because I really do intend to finish it eventually, so consider this a Tumblr exclusive.
❄ ❄ ❄
In a strange confluence, all three of them have found gainful employment at the same time.
Renji is guarding crates. He does not ask what is in the crates. He does not want to know what is in the crates. He stands next to the crates and his size deters most people. Occasionally, he is called upon to punch someone in the face. It’s good work.
Fujimaru got him this gig, actually. Mameji was good with numbers and he taught Fujimaru a lot, and now Fujimaru has a gig keeping the books for the guys who own the crates. That seems like pretty good work to Renji, too. Fujimaru says he wishes it involved more punching people. Renji wishes his job involved punching fewer people. Everyone’s got complaints.
Rukia has found work in a shop. This is charming and hilarious to both boys. It’s a pawn shop that paradoxically seems to buy about three times as much junk as it sells. It’s obvious that the only reason the owner hired Rukia is because the clientele likes to come in and look at her, but the fact is, she’s an amazing bargainer, and she’s making him a ton of change.
Renji stops in one late afternoon when his own shift is over, and watches her sell a man a knife that looks like it will break if he looks at it funny. She offers to throw in a shitty ball of twine and the man agrees to pay what is easily four times what the knife is worth, and leaves smiling. Amazing.
The shop owner eyes Renji warily. Renji never starts trouble, and he’s even stopped it once or twice, but at the same time, his presence is cramping the appeal of the pretty shopgirl.
“I’m off,” Rukia tells her boss.
“See y’tomorrow,” the seedy man grumbles.
“You don’t get paid every day?” Renji asks Rukia loudly. “I get paid at the end of every shift.”
“She gets paid at the end of the week,” the shopkeeper grouses.
Renji flexes one arm experimentally, admiring his own bicep. “It’s nice getting paid every day. Makes you want to come back the next day, y’know.”
“She comes back every day so she can get paid at the end of the week.”
Rukia’s eyes dart between them.
“Ah, you must be a great boss, very trustworthy,” Renji comments, stretching his back. “Although gettin’ paid every day is a nice way to show trust, too. Hey, Ru, you wanna stop at Takahashi’s on the way home? I heard they got in some dried mackerel and I,” he winks at Rukia’s boss, “got paid today.”
“Pfft,” Rukia huffs, wrapping her shawl around her shoulders. “I’m sure it’s a scam. We need rice, though, and more water.”
“Hey, girl,” Rukia’s boss spits out. “You had a good shift! Here’s your pay for today, as a reward for doing so well. Come back tomorrow, okay?”
“Of course,” Rukia agrees, taking the coins with a sly smile.
As they head out of town, she jabs him in the ribs with her elbows. “You’re so obvious.”
“Got you paid, didn’t I?”
“You did, thank you. He hates you, you know.”
Renji sighs dramatically. “How can I live with myself?”
Rukia snorts. “He’s gross, I hate him. I hate that whole job. Smiling at people. Acting kind to horrible people. It’s so fake. I don’t know why you like working so much, I’d rather just steal.”
“I’ve seen you working, what you do is not much different from stealing.” Renji rubs his hands together. It’s getting cold, especially with the sun setting. “I appreciate the effort, though. I mean, we do. Me and Fujimaru. I like this. Having money, that is. It’s nice.”
Rukia regards him out of the corner of her eye.
“Do you? Do you appreciate it?”
Renji frowns. “Yeah, of course I do. I know you don’t like it.”
Rukia stops walking and turns to him. “C’mere.” She gestures toward herself and makes the pointing motion she does when she wants him to bend down to her level. Even though this results in a cuff to the back of his head more often than not, Renji obeys. “If you really appreciate it, I think you should do something nice for me.”
Renji should know by now to be wary of such an ominous statement, but he falls for it anyway. “Sure. Name it.”
“I want to kiss you again.”
Renji tugs at his ponytail. “Again? Really?”
It was probably six years between the first and second time she had wanted to kiss him, but the second time had only been a few months ago, last spring, after he broke his arm saving her from a large, angry man she had attempted to pickpocket.
“You said you were open to the idea,” Rukia scowled.
“I...did,” Renji stammered. To be fair, he had been in immense pain at the time and probably would have agreed to just about anything. He could have used that as an excuse. It seemed like Rukia was thinking the same, he could tell she was already getting herself wound up to be hurt at his rejection. That stung a little, the idea that she expected so little of him. “No problem. Anything for you. Go for it.” He bent his knees a little deeper and squeezed his eyes shut, bracing for impact.
“You gotta relax a little, man, it’s not a punch in the nards,” Rukia scolded, grabbing ahold of his ears and laying one on him.
Renji didn’t fantasize about kissing girls. He liked girls well enough, but he liked guys more. There was one exception to that rule, and that was Rukia. He liked her more than anyone. It wasn’t right to fantasize about Rukia, though, in his opinion, because he lived with her and it wasn’t respectful and also… also, if he spent too much time thinking about things like kissing her, he might want to do it. So, he avoided the slippery slope of girls in general, and restricted his spicy kissing fantasies to the lean, knife-eyed Rukongai punks that hung out on street corners and had really sexy ways of saying “heeeeeey.” Renji was perpetually working on his “heeeeeeys.”
But Rukia was kissing him now, and it seemed equally disrespectful to pretend she wasn’t. Her lips were soft against his, and curious. Her fingers relaxed their painful grip on his ears and snuck around to rest on the back of his neck. She must have been keeping her hands in her sleeves, because they were warm, and they felt so good and this was good, this was so, so good and it occurred to Renji that maybe he was meant to kiss her back, she had never mentioned anything about--
“There, that wasn’t so bad, was it, Abarai?” Rukia was saying.
It was over.
Renji blew air out his cheeks. “Naw, it was fine. Ah, did you, uh… was it everything you hoped and dreamed?”
“It was okay,” she shrugged, but her eyes twinkled. She started walking again and Renji had to do a little skip and a jump to catch up. “Fujimaru’s probably home already. How come he didn’t come with you to pick me up?”
“Oh, there were extra crates today, so he’s working late. But we can have the rice ready and surprise him!”
“Mm, yes, that sounds nice,” Rukia agreed. She hummed a little as she walked. “Hey, Renji?”
“Yeah?”
“Back at the shop-- did you call me Ru? What was that?”
Renji made a face. “I dunno. I thought it was cute.” You’re cute, his brain added, and suddenly, he couldn’t unsee it. She was unbearably cute, wrapped up in her shawl, that little piece of hair hanging between her eyes, those beautiful eyes. “If you don’t like it, I’ll--”
“You’ve known me for nine years and you decide, just now, to give me a nickname?”
He shrugged. “Things can change, right? Even out here in the ass end of Rukongai?”
She regarded him for a moment. “It is cute. I will allow it, but only from you, and don’t do it around gross people like my greasy boss.”
“Yeah, no prob,” he agreed, squeezing his hands under his armpits. He had a bad feeling that they were in for a brutal winter this year.
“Hey!” Rukia said, and he realized she was holding out his hand to him. Gingerly, he took it, hoping she wouldn’t mind his own cold fingers. She didn’t seem to.
#renji's birthday 2k21#my writing#i was strongly tempted to do another chapter of the tattoo artist au on top of this#except that the next chapter doesn't even have renji in it#it has rukia and orihime TALKING ABOUT renji if that counts for anything#and then i ran out of time#i know i have posted an excerpt of this excerpt before i am sorry i just love it TOO MUCH
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hear your heartbeat
happy birthday to the incomparable @elisela!!! just for you, please enjoy a good fake-dating au with plenty of idiotic and family members abound.
12.5k - on Ao3
—————
“I’m telling you, Scotty. New York has been good to me. Maybe we should just renounce California and stay here for the summer.”
“Don’t joke about that, dude.”
Stiles laughed as he shouldered his phone, taking in the city air as he strolled along the streets of Manhattan.
Needless to say, Manhattan was far from home—while the city certainly was his vibe, Stiles was no stranger to tamping down the champagne tastes that clashed with his tapwater budget. The little shitbox apartment he got through NYU’s housing program was almost a thirty minute train ride from school, but Stiles figured that when he was more or less trapped on campus for nearly fifty hours a week, he could justify spending his breaks wandering the streets of Manhattan and really taking in the city.
On today’s agenda, Stiles was looking forward to wandering around a farmers market that literally stretched on for city blocks. There were fruits and vegetables literally as far as the eye could see, spices and roots and mysterious tubers of all shapes and size, but Stiles didn’t give a flying fuck about the food—his real interest were the vendors and the shoppers.
He had learned early on that open air markets like this were perfect meeting grounds for mythical beasts of all shapes and sizes, so, what better palace for him to do some… field work, so to speak?
There were nymphs who had full bouquets of beautiful flowers that lived suspiciously long in their vases as long as you complimented the blooms on a regular basis. Dryads who sold the most delicious fruit he had ever tasted, even if they charged six bucks for a pear.
Stiles had learned early on to avoid the fae—basically, any stand that sold crystal or metalcraft. His first time at the market, he had somehow wound up spending nearly four hundred dollars on quartz; the moment the money had left his hand, the stall had all but vanished in front of him.
“The people are good here. They’re fast. Blunt. Sarcastic. My kind of people.”
“Uh huh.”
Scott liked to call their whole situation lucky.
When Stiles applied to NYU’s doctorate program, he expected rounds and rounds of interviews, lists of deadlines he needed to memorize, and some less-than-subtle digs at his proposed field of study (which was fair, honestly—he knew that criminology and mythology rarely mixed).
What he didn’t expect was Scott, though, the bro of all bros. When Stiles told him he was applying to NYU, Scott had cheered him on, helped him prepare, and then immediately applied to different veterinary positions through the state.
(Scott was golden, obviously—he had years of training, letters of recommendation from everyone he had ever met, and him being a werewolf basically made him the animal whisperer.)
At the end of the day, Stiles got to pursue his passion thanks to a hodgepodge of grants at NYU, and Scott was awarded a fellowship in veterinary medicine through the Bronx Zoo. What kind of weird twist of luck would let the best friends wind up together across the country like that?
So, yeah, Scott called it luck.
Stiles called it karmic retribution for their supremely fucked-up years at Beacon Hills High, but even he could admit that ‘luck’ sounded nicer... and if Stiles was being honest, ‘luck’ was definitely the best way to classify his meeting Derek Hale.
Derek Hale was smart, he was sarcastic, and he could go toe-to-toe with Stiles over completely obscure things for literal hours. He was a first-year professor at NYU, who had the tiny office right next to the broom closet Stiles had managed to shove PHD desk into, and he was probably the only other person in the program that took mythology seriously (meaning he was the only person who didn’t make Stiles want to put his head through the wall).
He was also hot as fuck, but that was beside the point. Stiles had a little bit of a massive crush, but that was also beside the point.
They had built up a fast friendship based on a series of arguments about the Necronomicon, of all things, and Stiles loved the thought of being friends with someone who didn’t know him as the weird kid in high school who knew way too much about ritual sacrifice and circumcision.
He had evened out a lot through undergrad. He was still awkward, sure, but he was awkward with a refillable prescription for Adderall and some sort of brain-to-mouth filter.
(Honestly, the fact that Stiles had managed to avoid making a single joke about the werewolf who was stuck teaching Mythology 101 really did speak volumes to his newfound maturity.)
Speaking of Derek, though…
“Stiles! Hey, Stiles!”
Stiles almost jumped a foot in the air as he heard his name called, doing a spectacular near-drop-mid-air-catch of his phone as he regained his footing, turning on the spot to see a taller woman with jet black hair waving him over.
She was… okay, she was gorgeous—dark hair, smooth skin, someone who looked like she just stepped out of one of the windows on Fifth Avenue—but Stiles was decently distracted, because standing beside her was Derek Hale, the object of his extremely private affection for the past few months. Who, for whatever reason, was standing there looking like he wanted the sidewalk to open up and swallow him whole.
“Scotty, I’ll see you tonight, yeah? I gotta go.”
Stiles pocketed his phone as he cautiously made his way over to the pair—trio, he corrected, because there was another woman with them, looking incredibly more invested in the conversation now that another party was joining them.
He hiked his canvas a bit higher up as he smiled, trying to remember where he had seen the two before… students, maybe, but if that were the case, they would know Derek, not Stiles. They weren’t faculty members, he was sure of that. Donors to the program, maybe?
Well, if they were donors, Stiles sincerely hoped that Derek would have tried harder to wear literally any expression other than his current ‘bitter and miserable’.
And if they were donors, why were they so fucking happy to see him?
“I’m Laura. This is Cora.”
The taller of the two women extended her hand confidently as Stiles got within arms reach, and he instinctively reached out to take it, Cora following suit. “Derek has told us all about you. I have to say, I figured there was at least a ten percent chance you were made up, but… here you are!”
“Here I am!” Stiles was officially lost, but he kept his smile up, cheeks pinking up a little bit as he turned back to Derek. “You’ve been talking about me?” he asked, his voice on the line between flattered and teasing, nudging Derek playfully as he tilted his head.
“Stiles, I—“
“Of course he has! Derek’s a private guy, sure, but you can’t be surprised he told us about his new—“
“Laura—”
“Lord, Derek, calm down. You already had your big bisexual awakening, I’m allowed to be excited to meet your first boyfriend.” Laura shot back, her glare rivaling Derek’s absolute best ‘listen to teacher’ look, and Stiles could see the muscle in his jaw start to twitch. He probably would have done something, but… he was basically short circuiting, brain trying to keep up with whatever the fuck Laura had said, because Derek now had his arm around Stiles’ waist.
Derek had a big bisexual awakening?
And a boyfriend, apparently?
How had Stiles missed that??
“Stiles, these are my sisters, Laura and Cora Hale.”
Okay, great, they were Derek’s sisters. Stiles didn’t even know that Derek had sisters, which was a little sad if he thought about it.
Thankfully, he didn’t have long to think about it, because Derek—
“This is Stiles, my… my boyfriend. Now stop bombarding him. Give him half a fucking second before you go a thousand miles an hour.”
Oh—oh God. Stiles was the boyfriend.
He had seriously missed something, then—he didn’t think he had confessed his feelings for Derek anytime recently, or he probably would have died from embarrassment. Scott was really good at hiding his phone when he was drinking, which ruled that entire scenario out. Stiles could be forgetful at times, sure, but he thought he would remember if he had managed to score himself a boyfriend.
He looked up at Derek, trying to ignore the sudden burn of contact where their bodies were pressed together, but his brain was extremely focused the moment that he caught the look on Derek’s face, there and gone in a flash. He felt the hand squeeze at his waist, and the message was clear enough.
Please.
Ah, well. Stiles was always good at bullshitting, and this was no exception.
“No, no, Der, it’s fine! It’s good to meet you both, sorry, I wasn’t even expecting to see Derek until… uh, later, let alone meet anyone new,” Stiles said, his voice 100% betraying his nerves as it picked up an octave.
Laura’s voice was much more evenly toned, even if it was a little teasing. “Oh? You two have big plans tonight? We aren’t interrupting anything, are we?” she said with a grin, giving the distinct impression that even if they were interrupting, she and her sister wouldn’t be leaving until they were good and ready. Stiles felt his mind kick into overdrive, waving the question aside.
“Oh, nothing like that. We were going to meet up with my friend Scott for dinner, introducing the boyfriend to the best friend, you know how it is,” he continued, hoping his little chuckle wasn’t too terribly fake as he reached up to pat the lapels of Derek’s jacket, letting his fingers linger a little too long on Derek’s chest as he nodded.
He hoped that she knew how it was. Hell, Stiles didn’t even know how it was. He hadn’t exactly been rolling in romance since moving across the country.
“Well, if you say so,” Laura mused, raising a perfect brow, head tilted to the side. “You look like you’re about to pass out, Stiles. You alright?”
And, okay, Stiles knew enough to know what that meant. It meant that her super-sonic ears could hear his heart trying to break through his ribs with a staccato beat, typically a tell-tale sign that someone was lying, but… maybe he could work that to his advantage. He swallowed, voice a little tight as he laughed, waving the concern away.
“Sorry, I just wasn't… planning on meeting the family today,” Stiles said, probably the most truthful thing he had ever said. “Usually I’d try to prepare a little more, you know, make sure I’m wearing something nice and avoid putting my entire foot in my mouth. Maybe just a toe or two,” he said, relaxing minutely as Cora snorted from her position near Laura’s elbow.
Okay, so self depreciation was a good way to avoid suspicion with all the Hales. Got it.
“Well, if you both have plans, I’ll make this quick,” Laura said, her voice deceptively charming as she sidled up next to Stiles, though he certainly wasn’t going to complain about the way Derek’s hand tightened around his waist. “The semester is up soon, what are your plans this summer? Never mind, move them back. We’re having a family reunion the week after finals, and everyone is dying to meet baby brother Derek’s new boo after all the stories he’s told.”
…stories?
He looked up to Derek again, who was now blushing up to the tips of his ears, which—okay, cute—but which told him absolutely nothing and offered him exactly zero defense.
“Actually, I already have a flight booked as soon as my spring contract is up. Heading back to Beacon Hills for a few days, and—“
“Wait, did Derek already invite you?” Laura asked, her expression pleasantly surprised, and Stiles was speechless for a half second before Derek stepped in.
“No, I didn’t invite him because I’m not even going, Laura. Besides, he has his own plans with his own family,” he said, and Stiles blinked as he tried to keep up. “And what do you mean, they’re excited to meet him? I was very clear that the further I can keep him away from you and Mom, the better.”
Laura only rose a brow as she turned back to Cora, who took a beat before looking up from her phone, her expression halfway guilty as she clutched the device. “I uh—I may have just sent a picture of you two to the family group chat.”
Stiles choked on a laugh as Derek gasped—actually gasped—and pulled his phone from his pocket, making the mistake of releasing Stiles’ shoulder to unlock the device, looking absolutely scandalized as he glared at Cora.
It wasn’t long before Stiles had a similar look on his face, though, as Laura took advantage of his free arm, linking her own with his as she started to walk. “Alright, Stiles, here’s the deal.”
“Cora, you little—hey! Laura, get back here with my boyfriend!”
“Calm down little brother, the adults are talking.”
“He’s younger than I am!”
“So, Stiles, like I was saying,” Laura started, oblivious or ignorant to the way Stiles' mind had absolutely reeled when Derek had called him his boyfriend for the second time. “Derek hasn’t been home for more than a day visit since he moved out to this dump, and no one has raised a stink about it in years. This year, though, is… important,” she started, and Stiles nodded idly as he mentally ran through the calendar in his head.
The semester was over in just over a week, with finals crammed into three days after that, and then—oh, the full moon.
No, Stiles corrected himself, the blue moon. The first blue moon in May in probably… thirty years, if he had to guess. He nodded up to Laura as that clicked into place, a flicker of curiosity crossing over her face as she continued talking.
“We won’t take up that much of your time—it’s only like two events, I promise, and I also promise Derek will personally take care of whatever flight changes you have to make so you can still get some time with your family. After all, it’s not your fault my bonehead brother tried to exclude you until now.”
“I’m not a bonehead!” Derek said, his tone of voice just exasperated enough that Stiles sighed, carefully extracting himself from Laura’s grasp as they slowed to a stop near the curb of Fifth Avenue, the noise from the farmers market blending in with the sound of traffic as he turned back to Derek.
“Alright, hang on, hold up,” Stiles started, his tone firm enough to stop the three wolves in their tracks, Derek and Laura wearing matching expressions of surprise as they stopped in their tracks—even Cora was peeking over her phone, clearly interested, and Stiles couldn’t blame them. It had probably been a long time since either of them had been stopped by a human.
“Laura, Derek is not a bonehead. He’s smart, and he’s sweet, and he’s very kind, and it’s okay that he’s a little more private. Yeah, he’s also a stubborn asshole, but… well, that’s one of the reasons I like him so much,” Stiles said, the first genuine smile in the entire conversation gracing his face as he looked at Derek again. “But you know your brother. Did you really think that catching him off guard across the country in person was going to be the best way to convince him to visit?”
He was fine taking their silence as an answer, honestly.
“Now, Derek, that being said, I… if you are comfortable with it, I can rearrange my plans and come down with you. If you’re not comfortable with that, that’s okay too. Meeting the family—at least, the rest of the family—is a very big step,” he continued, his words very pointed.
(Yes, Derek, meeting the family would be a very big step for someone you weren’t even dating, please pick up on the subliminal messaging here.)
“But even if you’re not comfortable with me being there, I think you should still go down. I’ll get to spend plenty of time with my dad, you shouldn’t have to be all alone up here while I’m gone.”
Moving to smooth over the lapels on Derek’s jacket again, Stiles only barely tampered down a noise of surprise as Derek intercepted his hands, pleasantly shocked by how easily Derek’s warm, smooth fingers slipped between his own lanky digits.
Stiles felt his cheeks pinks up as he cleared his throat, doing his best to act normal, because he was… well, he wasn’t lying. He had absolutely thought about Derek being alone here in New York while Stiles was gone, but that was more in the sense that Stiles would miss him.
He just didn’t know that Derek might be missing some family, too.
Besides, he may not have known that much about the intricacies of a normal, family pack, but Stiles knew enough to know that a big event like this would probably be good for Derek, even if he didn’t want to admit it.
Even if Derek was going to reject his offer and go down alone.
…because Derek was going to reject him.
Derek was going to reject him, right?
Stiles had been fairly sure of that when he offered, but judging by the way Derek couldn’t meet his eyes after something as simple as holding hands, Stiles might have just fucked himself over. Derek opened and closed his mouth twice before he finally let out a huff of air and looked up, doing a remarkably good impression of a guilty animal as he looked at Stiles.
“…you’re sure you don’t mind?”
Fuck.
“Derek, I wouldn’t have offered if I minded,” Stiles said, and that much was at least true—but before he could say anything else, Laura was squealing in his ear, wrapping both of them up in a hug so tight Stiles almost had to remind her that he was human, but he was able to breathe again as the car next to the curb chirped.
“Thank God, Stiles, thank you for getting through to him! Oh, Nana is gonna flip out when she hears who’s coming—Derek, you know you’ve always been her favorite—Stiles, do you have any dietary restrictions? Derek, send me his number, and—no, Cora, you are not driving us back to the airport, move your ass—“
Stiles looked up to Derek, his expression somewhere between bemused and fearful as Laura rambled on, but… well, the apologetic look that Derek had on his face wasn’t much reassurance.
“—and Stiles, you’re going to love Beacon Hills. Bye boys! See you in two weeks!”
Stiles was left, partially shellshocked as Derek’s hand slipped from his own, the need for the facade no longer essential as the shiny silver rental car pulled into traffic.
“… Derek, since when the fuck are you from Beacon Hills?”
—————
“Scotty, stop laughing, this isn’t funny.”
“Dude, are you kidding me? This is hilarious.”
Stiles groaned as he shoved another slice of pizza into his mouth, ignoring the burning sensation that spread across his tongue as he tried to pack as much melted cheese as he could into one bite.
Scott’s apartment had been their go-to for the entire time he and Stiles had been in the city—not because it was huge and glamorous, not by any means, but Scott’s shoebox had a door between the bathroom and the living room, and therefore it was the best place for bro-time by default.
Stiles had loudly complained about the entire situation when he and Derek showed up on Scott’s stoop, firmly planting himself in his favorite of Scott’s chairs—the ‘old man’ recliner next to Scott’s little television, the game on screen forgotten as he recalled their harrowed tale.
“Stiles, if you weren’t comfortable with it, why even… okay, no, don’t you dare answer me until you swallow,” Derek snapped, and Stiles rolled his eyes as he swallowed a few times, sticking his tongue out at Derek once his mouth was empty.
“Good. Thank you for pretending to be an adult. Now, why did you even offer if it wasn’t something you were comfortable with.”
Because it was supposed to just be a gesture, Derek. Because I didn’t realize you would take it as a serious offer, Derek. Because you were supposed to say no, Derek.
… because I didn’t want you to be alone, Derek.
Honestly, as surprised as Stiles was that Derek took him up on his poorly-timed moment of goodness, he was even more surprised that after Laura drove off, when he numbly asked if Derek wanted to come over to Scott’s for some pizza, Derek actually said yes.
Derek Hale was being social. Alert the media.
(Well… maybe ‘social’ was stretching it a bit—Stiles didn’t know if it was a territory thing or what, but Derek had turned hilariously, awkwardly stiff the moment he stepped inside Scott’s apartment.)
“I offered because I’m nice, dick, but don’t even think that you can turn this on me. Derek, they knew my name. They knew what I looked like. And yeah, I mean, I’m a complete catch and all—oh fuck off, Scotty—but what in the actual, literal fuck?”
Stiles didn’t think it was possible, but somehow Derek got even more tense, shoulders tightening up toward his ears as he looked down. It took a moment before he answered, but Stiles knew by then that Derek usually had to… wind himself up to talk about some things.
“My mother lives on the opposite end of the country, and even then, she still managed to set up twenty four blind dates for me last year. Twenty four, Stiles. That’s basically one every other week. Do you have any idea how much small talk that is? And how much I hate small talk?”
Yes, Stiles thought, to both of those questions. He would never admit this out loud, of course, but thinking about one of the most intensely private people that he knew stuck at some shitty little coffee shop trying to chat with some random female on behalf of his mother was hilarious to a degree he couldn’t fathom.
It definitely wasn’t a redirection of his own… personal feelings that may or may not be directed at Derek. Not at all. Nope.
“So, around the time the spring semester started, when my mother let slide that she had passed along my number to yet another perfectly eligible barista, or something, I panicked and told her I had a boyfriend. And then she asked for a photo, and the most recent one on my phone was that selfie you sent miming your own death in the stacks, so…”
“Oh fuck, Derek,” Stiles started, downing the last of his beer. “Your big bisexual awakening wasn’t just you trying to get out of your mom setting you up on dates, right?”
“Don’t flatter yourself, ass,” Derek said, rolling his eyes as he shook his head. “The two events were completely separate.”
Stiles laughed at the thought, but even then, his mind was reeling. If this wasn’t a recent discovery, how in the fuck did Stiles miss that for so long?
“Well, you’re lucky Scotty and I had a flight booked anyway. I won’t let you face them alone, not when you have a picture perfect boyfriend to show off now—what role should I take on? Doting, love struck fool? Rebel without a care? Some sad forlorn loser who… okay, no, that one is too close to home.”
Scott stood up and laughed as Derek glared at Stiles again, but it didn’t take a genius to see the tiny smile on his face, or the way his shoulders eased as he leaned back into the couch.
“Alright, this is getting too intense a conversation while the game is on. Want another beer, Stiles? You, Derek?”
Stiles made a vaguely affirming noise as he wove his hand in Scott’s direction, eyes drawn back to Derek yet again as the other wolf politely declined, his own attention affixed to the television as the game picked back up.
Derek was… not a particularly expressive person, Stiles knew, and part of that was because Derek had what Stiles affectionately called ‘resting grumpy face’; at least, he did privately, because the one time he said it out loud Derek had thrown the Encyclopaedia of Demomorgons at his head.
So, to the outsider looking in, Derek might have just seemed uninterested in the game; but Stiles had been watching Derek work for the better part of a semester, and he knew perfectly well how to tell when Derek’s resting grumpy face formed an actual frown. Which it did. Because apparently, the Mets had personally offended him.
“I’m sorry, are you seriously glaring at the Mets? While they’re winning?”
Derek leveled Stiles with the most unimpressed glare he could as Scott laughed from his kitchen, walking back into the living room with two beers. “God, I hope he was. It would be nice to have someone with taste in the apartment for once.”
“Scotty!” Stiles gasped, clutching his heart as Scott handed him a beer, extending the claw on his thumb to pop the top off before he handed the bottle over. “The Mets are a treasure, okay? If God lived in New York, she’d be a Mets fan. I have suffered much for my Mets in my lifetime, and they—woah, Derek, you okay?”
Stiles’ charming cliches would have to wait, because when he looked over to Derek, his humor dropped immediately. Derek had gone white as a sheet, jaw slack as he stared at the beer in Stiles’ hand.
He stared back and forth between Scott and Derek, trying to figure what the hell had just happened; it wasn’t until he watched Scott pop the top off of his own beer, looking between the two of them, did Stiles put two and two together.
“Derek, you… you had to know that Scott was a were, right? Like, you had to. He—Scotty doesn’t do subtle.”
“Me?! Stiles, you called me a wet dog for like a month after I fell into the Hudson.”
Derek let out a sort of choked noise as he shut his mouth, coming back into himself as a bit of pink dusted his pale cheeks, hands moving in front of his face. “Of—of course I knew, but—you knew?!”
“Dude, I’m studying mythical lore and criminology. I’m the one who taught this furry fucker how to control himself. Of course I knew, I... oh my god. You didn’t know that I knew—uh, that I know.”
Matching looks of realization dawned on Scott and Stiles’ face as Stiles stood up, putting the beer down on the coffee table. He moved next to Derek as he sat down on the couch, keeping his movement slow, reaching out to pat Derek’s leg like he was a frail old lady.
“Derek, I know.”
After what felt like an age and a half, Derek melted into the couch, a huge sigh leaving his lips as all the tension in his body bled out like a string had been cut, burying his head in his hands.
“We’ve had arguments about wolves in pop culture. I’ve offered to help you out with your coursework every full moon for, like, the entire semester. Dude, you had to know that I knew, there’s no way I didn’t—Derek!” Stiles felt his giddy laughter bubble over as Derek shot him a red-eyed glare through his fingers, his scowl somehow less intimidating now that everything was out in the open.
Okay, Derek wasn’t just a wolf, he was an alpha. That was… interesting.
“God, you two really are perfect fake boyfriends. Two halves of a whole idiot. Derek, are you sure you don’t want a beer? Or maybe something stronger, if you have to deal with Stiles?” Scott said easily, laughing as Stiles immediately protested, though the way Stiles eased himself next to Derek wasn’t exactly subtle, either.
—————
Scott may have been joking, but by the time finals had come and gone, Stiles had accepted the fact that he would have to forgo booze and opt for a mainline of caffeine to keep up with Derek. How one person remained so meticulously organized, Stiles would never know—but in the amount of time it took for Stiles to wrap up his grant work for the semester, Derek had given four exams, proctored three more, cleaned out his office, and shared the updated flight itinerary with Stiles.
“Wait, wait, hang on,” Stiles had said, tripping over an empty box in his tiny office as Derek handed him his updated boarding pass. “Why do we have to change our flights? Scott and I are already booked, you can probably just join us, right?”
Derek rose a perfectly sculpted brow as he tapped the ticket again, shaking his head. “Hey, I promised you’d spend as few days as possible with my family, and I intend to keep that promise. The sooner we get in, the sooner we start that clock, the sooner you get to spend the rest your time with your dad.”
Stiles blinked as he looked down to the itinerary, eyes scanning over the earlier time—and it was non-stop too. That would be a bit killer on the legs, but Stiles could handle that, maybe he could take some time to sleep or pester Derek for...
“Uh, Derek... this ticket is for first class.”
“I know, Stiles, I booked it.”
“Dude, there’s a reason Scott and I booked an economy ticket with a layover in Bismarck. There’s no way I can pay you back for this.”
If looks could kill, Stiles would be... maybe not dead, but at least set on fire. Derek sighed, as though the weight of the world was on his shoulders as he rolled his eyes.
“You’re not paying me back, dumbass. You’re already doing a ton for me with this little... charade, the least I can do is make sure your frail human body—“
“Hey!”
”—is comfortable in a lie flat seat.”
“Look, I appreciate that, but I’m not leaving Scott alone on his flight in coach just because of our... fake... whatever.”
Stiles’ voice trailed off in curiosity as Derek sighed, his cheeks pink as he pulled the paper out of Stiles’ hand, pointing to the second half of the sheet—where MCCALL, SCOTT had been printed in big, bold letters, that Stiles had completely ignored.
“... you got Scott a ticket too?”
“Of course I did. He’s your best friend, I wasn’t going to ask you to leave him behind just for me. Besides, who do you think I got your information from to book the flight?” Derek said dryly, as though his deadpan delivery could cancel out the ruddy color to his cheeks, or the way that Stiles’ stomach flip flopped when the reality of that sunk in.
It was nice that Derek acknowledged the importance of their friendship, in the way that tugged at the little space right beneath his sternum, but something about the way Derek so quickly dismissed himself was... concerning.
Stiles couldn’t help but play that little bit of their conversation over in his head as he packed, as he hopped on the train, as he met up with Scott and Derek in security.
Scott, bless his heart, was absolutely elated—his excitement was almost tangible as they dropped off luggage, walked through security, and stood around at the boarding gate. Derek had to smack the both of them to get them to stand up when first class was called to board, and Stiles idly wondered if Derek regretted associating himself with them when he and Scott managed to trip in sync as they went down the jetway.
Derek and Stiles were seated together, of course, and once Stiles got over the novelty of not having a middle seat on a plane, he liked to imagine he fit right in—easing back into the seat, enjoying the comfort of the little blanket he had been given, grinning at the flight attendant as she checked in with them.
(Scott was one row ahead and across the aisle, close enough that Stiles could lean forward and smack him if he wanted to... but the moment Stiles saw his seat mate, a pretty woman with dark hair and impeccable eyeliner, he knew his best bro would be on a different planet for the entirety of the flight.)
His grin slipped a little bit, though, as he thought back to the conversation surrounding the tickets, and he looked up to Derek as he settled in a bit further.
“So, we never went over what role I should be taking on.”
“Stiles, just be yourself. You’re funny enough, and you generally mean well, they’ll love who you are.”
Yeah… who he was. Well, who he was was someone who was going to be dangerously invested in a fake relationship that would probably end terribly for him, so that was fun. He sighed as he settled into the seat, opening and closing his mouth a few times as he debated on where to go from here.
No time like a non stop plane ride to have a potentially awkward conversation, right?
“Dude, we’re friends, right?”
“We’re fake boyfriends, don’t call me dude.”
Derek’s tone was teasing as he flipped through his SkyMall, a small smile on his face, and Stiles felt a little bit of the tension ease out of his shoulders as he buckled in.
“First of all, I have called many boyfriends ‘dude’ before,” Stiles started, ignoring Derek’s snort of laughter, “and I’m being serious. We... we are friends, right?”
Be it his words or his awkward energy, Derek looked up, surprise on his face as he closed the magazine and stowed it away as the plane bumped down the taxiway.
“Of course we are, Stiles. You’re like... the only person I talk to at work outside of teaching, that’s light years ahead of most of New York as a whole.”
“I mean, I’m glad to hear, I just...” Stiles chewed on his lip as he turned in his seat, weirdly soothed by the roar of the engines as the takeoff roll started. “You know about my dad, and about my school, and about Scott, and those are basically the three important things in my life,” he started, letting out a sigh as Derek just stared at him blankly.
“It’s fine that you’re a private person, I can respect that... seriously, I may not understand it, but I can respect it,” Stiles said, grinning as Derek shot him a look, lowering his voice again as he leaned over the divider between them. “But I didn’t know that you were from my hometown, too. Or that you had sisters, let alone other family. I should have asked, I guess, but... you know you can talk to me about things, yeah? Even after all this is over, you’ll always be Derek to me. Not just another Hale.”
Stiles’ was smiling as he gently bumped Derek’s shoulder with his own, watching the way different emotions warred over his face, biting back on the urge to babble on so he could give Derek the time he needed to respond.
“We’re... we are friends, Stiles. We are.” Derek insisted, looking down to his linked hands as the plane continued to rise. “Sometimes, I just... I’m not great about talking about myself.”
For a while, Stiles thought that was all he was going to get, and honestly, he was fine with it—it wasn’t until the fasten seatbelt sign chimed off and the flight attendants passed out little bottles of water that Derek spoke again, his voice low as he cleared his throat.
“My family is huge. Like, big enough that we need spreadsheets and flowcharts to organize family events like this. I know they love me, and I love them too, of course I do, but I made some really, really stupid decisions when I was younger… I know they forgave me for it, but...”
Derek sighed, taking a deep breath as he ran his hands through his hair.
“Sometimes it’s hard to be around them and still be okay with myself, you know?”
No, Stiles didn’t know. He only had his dad and Scott growing up, but he nodded his head encouragingly as he took a sip of his water.
“I actually have four siblings. Mark is the oldest, and then Taylor, and I’m right between Laura and Cora. They’re betas, like my dad; my mom and I are both alphas, her mom, too…” Derek continued, and Stiles smiled as he settled into his seat.
By the time the flight landed, Stiles’ head was full to the brim with Hale family trivia, names, faces, teasing stories, and the warmth that had danced across Stiles’ chest for the past year or so had bloomed into a full-on fire.
Would it lead to his downfall? Probably.
But when he saw how Derek smiled when he remembered Mark’s graduating medical school, or heard the pride in his voice when he talked about Laura’s charity work, and the genuine joy he got to see when he heard another story about Derek’s childhood… well, that was all more than worth it.
—————
“I think you should kiss me.”
Stiles had to stop himself from laughing at the look that Derek shot him, doing his best to keep his body language casual as he leaned against the gas pump at a tiny station outside of Beacon Hills, though he knew his heart was going at about a million miles a minute.
“I—you—what?”
“Derek, I’m an affectionate dude, in case you couldn’t tell from all the hand holding. And if you’re going to freak out if I kiss your cheek, then you should freak out now, not when we’re in front of your family.”
Stiles knew full well his heart betrayed his confidence, but seeing Derek’s ears go pink as he dumped the armful of snacks Stiles had asked for into the back seat was a welcome sight—it was always nice to know that Derek’s cool and controlled exterior could be ruffled up once in a while.
Somewhere between the rental kiosk and the gas station, Stiles had decided that he was going to go all in on this. His little crush was already stuck right in the back of his throat and would be unlikely to dislodge any time soon, so he figured that indulging himself in the fake relationship Derek had set up for him… well, it wouldn’t do any good, but it was unlikely to make things worse for him than it already was.
It was a little weird being alone with Derek—Stiles didn’t realize it until now, but between meeting Derek’s sisters and meeting the rest of their family, this was the first time they had been alone together. They had other staff members at school, or strangers around the city, or Scott (who had politely declined a ride back to Beacon Hills with Derek and Stiles, choosing instead to split an Uber with his pretty new friend, Kira).
“You know, as far as first kisses go, usually they’re a little more romantic than just a demand. You’re supposed to woo me, Stiles,” Derek said, his sarcastic tone betrayed by his shy little smile as he pulled the nozzle out of his tank, closing the gas cap as Stiles gasped in mock offense.
“Hey, I said you should kiss me, not the other way around. Why should I have to be the one to woo?” Stiles started, sliding into the passenger’s seat as Derek followed suit. “After all, this relationship wouldn’t have even happened without your instigation, so why should I… uh… Der?”
Stiles’ voice trailed off as Derek’s hand sunk into the soft crook at the juncture of his neck, effectively cutting off his entire train of thought as Derek’s thumb pressed against the hollow of his jaw.
“Stiles.”
“Yeah?”
“I’m going to kiss you now.”
“O-Okay.”
For a minute, all Stiles could think of were those cheesy old rom-coms, where fireworks would go off, or bells would chime, but kissing Derek was nothing like that. It was the comfort of wrapping yourself in an electric blanket, instead of the shock of jumping into a frozen pond; the familiar buzz of goosebumps over his skin over a bolt of lightning. He felt a surprised little noise leave his chest as Derek’s tilted his head to deepen the kiss, his tongue flicking out instinctively to drag along Derek’s bottom lip, hands coming up to rest against the wolves chest.
Stiles could feel his heart beating through every inch of his skin as the kiss broke, struggling to remind himself how to breathe as he opened his eyes again, his nose brushing against Derek’s as he let out a little huff of a laugh.
“Was that enough woo for you?” Derek asked, his voice barely more than a whisper, and Stiles smiled as he nodded his head, savoring the way that neither of them moved back. Derek’s hand was warm against the crook of his jaw, his own palm flat against Derek's chest, and it was natural, it was so nice, it was—
Fake. It was all fake.
Stiles sighed, closing his eyes as he gently leaned in and pressed their foreheads together, that mantra playing through his head as he pulled himself back. He buckled himself in easily as he took in a deep breath, his goofy grin still in place as he looked back up to Derek.
“See? Now you can honestly tell your mom we had our first kiss at a gas station and that it was magical and I totally rocked your world.”
“Is that what happened, though? I mean, if you wanted me to kiss you so badly, you should have just asked,” Derek said, the sarcasm thick in his voice as he started the car, and Stiles laughed as they pulled out of the lot, his hand finding Derek’s easily once again.
Their silence remained comfortable as they left the city skyline behind and basically blew through Beacon Hills, the trees inching closer to the road as they wound through the preserve.
Finishing off a bag of M&M’s, Stiles cleared his throat as he crumpled up the wrapper and chucked it in the back seat, sucking a little bit of melted chocolate off of his thumb. “So. Is this regular introducing-the-boyfriend-to-the-family nerves I’m looking at here, or is this introducing-the-fake-boyfriend-to-the-family nerves? You don’t have any weirdos in your family, do you? An ex-felon auntie? A cousin who doesn’t quite get personal space?”
Stiles grinned as Derek laughed, oddly comforted by the sound as Derek shook his head. “Nothing exciting. A weird uncle, I guess. Lots of cousins, you should basically abandon any idea of personal space as soon as we walk in, and plenty of human family, too—so you won’t be alone in that. As far as felons go, well… none of us have been caught?”
“Hey, game recognizes game, it doesn’t count if you don’t get caught. And I can work with a weird uncle.” Stiles laughed at the sheepish look that Derek shot his way, his fingers still happily wrapped up in Derek’s warm hands. He could almost feel it when they crossed over onto the Hale land, the huge, white house as much of a giveaway as the shrieks of joy that even Stiles could hear from the property.
“They’re gonna love you, you know?” Derek’s voice was soft as he pulled the rental into a long row of cars, nearly lining the road leading up to the house, and Stiles felt the snarky remark die on his tongue as Derek caught his eye, his expression somewhere between grateful and wistful as he turned the car off.
“Maybe, but…” Stiles sighed as he popped his door open, chewing over his next words carefully. “But if they do, it’s because they already love you.”
He took it as a personal victory when Derek turned away, his ears pink again, and Stiles couldn’t help but grin as he followed the werewolf up the path to his family home.
The Hale House was probably as huge and impressive as the Hale family itself from the outside, and Stiles did his best not to gape like a fool as Derek opened the door for him, his hand finding the small of Stiles’ back as they stepped into the house. Polished floors, huge, high windows, a grand staircase that was the definition of grand, and—
“Derek!”
—and another unfairly attractive Hale moving forward to greet them. Tall, broad, dark hair with just a splash of salt around the temples and the goatee, shining a million watt smile on Derek and Stiles as he wiped his hands on his probably-uncomfortably-tight jeans.
Jesus, was everyone in this family gorgeous? Stiles was going to get a complex.
He looked up as the stranger and Derek briefly hugged, watching the halfway-subtle way they scented one another, Mark’s head buried in Derek’s neck for a half moment before they pulled away. If Stiles strained his ear, he could have heard something along the lines of ‘be nice’ as Derek pulled back; if the situation weren’t so funny, Stiles probably would have blushed.
“Don’t listen to him, I’m always nice. I’m Mark, and you…” Mark started, his million watt smile back in place as his eyes dragged over Stiles’ body, “... you must be Stiles.” Stiles snorted as Mark pulled him into an easy hug, catching Stiles just a little off-guard as he was wrapped in another pair of arms.
Apparently Derek’s family was an affectionate bunch. Stiles didn’t know if it was a wolf thing or a Hale thing, but either way, it was good to know.
“Mark, uh, Seattle, right? You’re the surgeon?” Stiles asked, clearing his throat as the hug carried on just a bit too long, regaining some footing in the introduction as he pulled back. “Derek’s told me a lot about you.”
That was… mostly true, Derek had told him enough about Mark to thoroughly embarrass the older male, and Mark looked like he expected nothing less as he laughed, holding Stiles’ shoulders as he stood at arms length. “Yeah, I’m sure he did, but it’s probably all garbage. After all, how can you really describe a wonder like me in words, huh?”
He actually winked, and Stiles honestly couldn’t believe that this dude was for real.
“Der, nice job with this one. He’s cute. Kid, is my brother treating you well? Cause, you know, if Hale is your taste, you can do much better than—”
”Mark—“
“Oh, lighten up Der-bear, there isn’t enough Botox in the world to get rid of those scowl lines. It was a joke. Now come on, everyone’s out back.”
Stiles laughed again as Mark put Derek in an easy headlock, ruffling up his hair as he led them outside, immediately filing ‘Der-bear’ away for future use as they stepped out into the backyard.
The backyard, which was absolutely filled with Hales.
He felt his heart do a funny little lurch as he was hit with the sheer family of it all—all dark haired, all gorgeous, and for just a moment, he wanted to smack Derek upside the head. There were probably generations of Hales here; Derek had all this family, this built in support group, and he was just going to spend the summer holed up in New York?
“Alright, Siles, we’re gonna keep you in with the main family and keep you away from the cousins,” Mark started, artfully ignoring the way Derek was swatting at him. “Uncle Peter all but insisted that Mom come pick him up, so you’ll get to avoid them until later tonight, but who you really want to watch out for is—“
“Is that my grandbaby?!”
Mark stiffened as Derek perked up, and Stiles couldn’t help but snicker as a bony hand shot up, grabbing Mark by the scruff of his neck, pulling him off of Derek with a flourish that would probably seem overly dramatic if Stiles didn’t know just how much werewolf strength was packed behind it.
“Derek!”
“Hi, Nana.”
Stiles couldn’t keep the smile off of his face as Derek leaned in to wrap his arms around the older woman—she was a good foot shorter than he was, her movements loud, with light skinned with the same tell-tale black hair that the rest of the family had. What caught Stiles’ eye, though, was the way Derek scented her—it was the same way Mark scented him, a familial nudge that Stiles read easily as a sign of deference.
Whoever this Nana was, she was clearly the woman in charge here.
“You know, we’re all technically her grandbabies,” Mark started as he reappeared at Stiles’ shoulder, rubbing the back of his neck, his childish pout painfully obvious as he pointed his words. “But you wouldn’t know it with the blatant favoritism she shows for Derek!”
“Mark, don’t be such a baby,” Nana Hale said as she pulled back from Derek’s hug, patting his cheek affectionately. She raised a brow in a spectacularly unimpressed fashion as she turned to look at her eldest grandson, sighing in mock disappointment. “Not that I thought a career based off of liposuction and face lifts would have brought you some maturity.”
“That’s—I don’t just do—Nana!”
“Now, who do we have here? Derek, are you going to introduce me to your special friend?”
Ignoring Mark’s protests easily as she turned her attention, Stiles felt his heart pick up again, his eyes flicking to Derek as he beamed; Stiles wasn’t sure if he was happy to see Mark get smacked down, or if he was happy to introduce Stiles, but Stiles would have literally killed a man to see Derek smile that brightly on a regular basis.
“Nana, this is my boyfriend, Stiles Stilinski. Stiles, this is my grandmother, Ger—“
“Nana Hale will do just fine, thank you very much,” she interrupted, pulling a face that made Stiles grin—he could absolutely relate to someone who would rather set their birth name on fire than own up to it. “Now, come here, let me get a look at you.”
Stiles stepped forward and hesitated a half moment, not sure if he should try one last time for a handshake or wait for her to initiate a hug, but before he could make up his mind she had her hands clasped on his elbows, a grip like iron stopping him in his tracks.
“Scrawny little thing, aren’t you? We’ll take care of that, don’t you worry. It’s good to meet you, sweetheart, let’s get you some food.”
“It’s good to meet you too—and some food sounds great,” Stiles said with a laugh, ignoring the fact that he was still full of junk food as Nana Hale all but preened beside him. Her grip was gentle but unyielding as she dragged him to a table that was piled with food, giving a half wave to Laura and Cora, who were stationed beside a punch bowl the size of a fish tank as he kept himself a half step behind Nana.
Stiles wasn’t dumb, okay? He knew how to make nice with wolves, and more importantly, he knew how to be subtle.
(He didn’t like it, but he knew how to do it.)
“Uncle Derek! Get Uncle Derek!!”
Thankfully, the moment was over in a flash as Stiles heard a familiar name called out in a high pitched squeal, looking back out to the yard where a hoard of kids had just caught sight (or scent?) of Derek, immediately abandoning the rough-and-tumble games they seemed to be wrapped up in to run toward Derek as fast as their little legs could carry them.
Derek immediately tensed, a manic grin on his face as he prepared to run, body twitching as he caught himself before taking off. He sent a look Stiles’ way that was somehow both apologetic and asking remission, and Stiles sighed as he smiled.
“You better run, Uncle Derek. They’re gonna get you,” Stiles said mock-seriously, only barely keeping a straight face as Derek instead ran straight to the kids, making all sorts of comedic noises as they mobbed his legs.
Fuck, he was cute.
Stiles’ attention was pulled off of Derek as he felt eyes on him, subtly scanning the yard before he made eye contact with another adult in the family, who was very shirtless, and very sweaty, and very much walking toward them with a bright smile on his face.
Okay, Stiles was definitely getting a complex.
“You must be Stiles!” he exclaimed once he was closer to their little group, and Stiles had never been as thankful for a child as he was for the tiny body perched on top of the other males shoulders, because he was just about at his ‘hugging gorgeous people’ limit. He was still sweating, for fucks sake, but Stiles supposed that even a wolf got tired out when they had eight kids hanging from their body until Uncle Derek stepped in.
“I am, and…” Stiles was about to assume this was the firefighter sibling, but as soon as he opened his mouth, the kid on top of his shoulders smiled, and Stiles was absolutely smitten. “And who is this little guy?”
The distraction was apparently a welcome one, because shirtless dude’s smile grew even wider, reaching up to pat the kid on a mop of curly hair before he lifted him up and over, holding him at chest level. “This is Isaac. Isaac, can you say hi to Stiles? He’s your uncle Derek’s special friend.”
Stiles literally felt his heart melt as Isaac gave a shy little wave, looking up at him with big blue eyes. He couldn’t have been older than three or four, and Stiles smiled and waved back as Isaac was set down on the ground.
“You wanna go play with Uncle D?” Any hint of shyness was forgotten the moment the question was asked, taking off toward Derek as fast as his little legs could carry him, which… wasn’t very fast, but was very, very cute.
“They all yours?” Stiles asked, raising an eyebrow as he looked over to Derek, who now had at least six kids hanging off of him. He smiled as the other male shivered, shaking his head quickly.
“God no, just the three. Erica and Boyd, and Isaac too, now that the adoption has been finalized. Those kids basically run the joint, Derek included—as long as you don’t mind the occasional toddler mobbing, you’ll fit in just fine.”
“Thanks, random shirtless man, I really hope so.”
Stiles grinned as Laura choked on a mouthful of punch, the weirdness of the situation apparently just now visible to her as she sputtered, punching her brother in the arm. “Oh god, Taylor, what is wrong with you! Go put on a shirt, you can’t just—you didn’t even introduce yourself, I swear—Stiles is a guest, you weirdo!”
They kept bickering back and forth as Taylor pulled an undershirt on over his head, the whining turning into background noise as he poured himself a glass of punch. He knew perfectly well what Laura was trying to say—Stiles is a human—and he was pretty sure he was mostly flattered by everyone trying so hard, but any coherent thought left his head as he took a bite of the ribs, watching Nana Hale grin out of the corner of his eyes as he groaned in delight.
“God, they really do have Derek wrapped around their pudgy fingers,” Cora mused, and Stiles nodded his head, swallowing. It was honestly hilarious to watch Derek try to manage all those kids by himself; they seemed determined to pile themselves onto his head and shoulders, and he could almost see Derek sweat, trying to make sure he didn’t drop anyone as Isaac managed to wriggle his way into Derek’s grip.
He tilted his head in consideration, taking a sip of his drink before he spoke up.
“Yeah, he always did strike me as that kind of Alpha.”
He couldn’t help but savor the way the conversation ground to a halt around him, Laura and Taylor both sucking in a deep breath as Mark shattered the glass he was holding. There probably was a better way to acknowledge that he was in on the secret, but as funny as it was watching Derek’s siblings tiptoe around the fact, he figured it was best to rip the bandaid off in one go.
Even if it meant he had the attention of the Hales closest to him in one second, flat, Nana’s burning red from where she stood with a plate piled high with food.
He probably should have been nervous, but as he looked back at Derek, he could tell it was the right choice—Derek was all smiles, waiting only a beat before he popped his fangs and playfully snapped at one of his little nieces, the air soon full of squealing laughter once again.
Keeping his gaze even, Stiles smiled in thanks as he took the plate of food Nana offered to him, watching as her eyes melted back into their darker, human color. She was staring at him like he was a particularly complex puzzle, and she wasn’t alone—Cora looked hilariously outraged that she didn’t realize sooner, and even Mark was looking over him with renewed interest as his hand healed.
“I knew you were a smart boy. He told you?”
Nana’s question was accusing, but not unkind, and Stiles shrugged it off easily as he popped a chip into his mouth.
“He didn’t have to. My best friend was bitten when we were both fifteen. He didn’t have… anything, no alpha, no pack, just me and my mad Googling skills, and we’ve had plenty of supernatural run-ins over the years. Derek didn’t tell me because he didn’t have to tell me—I’m not anything special, but I’d like to think I can spot a non-human from at least fifty feet. Maybe more on a good day.”
“Well, that’s where you’re wrong.”
Stiles jumped as he heard Derek’s voice from behind him, and it truly was a credit to his poise and sophistication that he only blushed a little as Derek’s arm snaked around his waist. His body was warm, far warmer than it had been ten minutes ago, and Derek’s breath came a little heavy as he kissed the back of Stiles’ head.
“You are definitely something special.”
“You—you absolute cheeseball, what is wrong with you—” Stiles managed to get out as he shoved at Derek’s shoulder, his entire face burning red as Laura and Cora both gagged. Any residual awkwardness melted away as Nana’s sharp laugh cut through the air, the sound putting him back at ease as he leaned back into Derek’s warmth.
Somewhere between the fortieth round of storytelling and the gathering moving back into the house, Stiles needed a breather. Derek’s family was huge, and loud, and honestly, Stiles loved it—but it wasn’t long before he felt an itch beneath his skin, his fingers buzzing against his thigh, the muscles in his jaw a little too tight.
Stiles had expected Derek to be pretty popular in the family—what he didn’t expect, though, was that he would be anything more than an introduction and the same polite questions that everyone gave the new boyfriend.
“Wait, no fucking way did the two of you take down a Kanima, Stiles, I’m calling bullshit right now—“
Derek’s siblings were great, but they were also the worst; the minute they found out that Stiles had his own supernatural background, they were pestering him for stories, demanding his opinion of things, getting more and more exasperated with his entire life the more he shared.
Stiles knew that his life was crazy, okay? He didn’t need the constant reminders or the slack-jawed shocked expressions to reinforce that fact.
“Jesus, we didn’t even know that there were any wendigos in the state, and you knew an entire family of them?”
The only stories he flat out refused to talk about were the… issues he had had with hunters through high school—this was a party, after all, and he didn’t want to be the one to bring the vibe down by talking about the one time an assassin held a gun to his head to try and draw Scott out.
Fun times.
“What do you mean, you just know a banshee? And set her up with a hellhound? Dude, who are you?!”
Kissing Derek had, oddly enough, only exasperated the situation. In less than a day, they had gotten better at trading little affections back and forth; but instead of helping Stiles calm down, they only increased that thrumming nerves that bounced around at the base of his skull.
Which sucked, honestly, because kissing Derek was… really, really nice.
Stiles waited until another cousin who’s name he would never remember caught Derek up in a conversation about another tradition he couldn’t follow before he squeezed Derek’s hand, taking the opportunity to stand up from his spot on the couch and slip away.
The Hale House was huge, and outside was no exception; Stiles soon found himself on the porch, a huge wraparound wooden structure with built-in benches that let you enjoy the kind of view that made Stiles remember why he loved home so much. He treated himself to a few pictures of the sunset over Beacon Canyon before he flopped himself down on a bench, rubbing at his neck.
“Stiles? Everything alright?”
He had half expected Derek to follow him out after a few moments—but to his surprise, it was Nana Hale that sat beside him, her cheeks still pink with laughter as she tucked a jet black flyaway behind an ear.
“Is—oh, no, it’s great! Just wanted to, uh, snap a few pictures of the view.”
Another half truth—he was full to bursting with those lately.
“I know that our family can be… a little overwhelming,” she said, her tone even as she rose a brow, keeping her gaze forward as her fingers drummed a pattern into her knee.
Stiles hummed in agreement, his own smile a touch more genuine as he looked over to her. “Maybe, but that’s not a bad thing. When I was growing up, I spent so much time wondering what it would be like, to have siblings, and cousins, and… well, it might be a lot, but it’s a lot of love, too. I’m really glad Derek has that kind of support.”
Nana’s fingers stilled against her knee as she turned to face Stiles, and for the first time, Stiles was really able to get a good look at her properly. He could understand why she was the matriarch of the family, and how she had kept that title so long; even if he hadn’t witnessed her taking Mark down less than four hours ago, there was a whole other kind of strength that she was showing here, radiating off of her in waves.
“He does. But he doesn’t just have us for love and support... or was I reading the way you look at him wrong?” Her tone was teasing as she rose her brow, and Stiles felt his cheeks pink up spectacularly as he coughed, his eyes flashing back to the window for only a moment before Nana patted his knee.
“Don’t worry, the house is completely soundproof. Those nosy little pups can’t hear a word we say. Now tell me, how long have you been in love with my grandson?”
Now fully, beautifully red, Stiles groaned as he hid his face in his hands, Nana’s laughter ringing strong and clear as she stood up and walked toward the railing. “Oh don’t be so dramatic, I have no intention of spoiling that surprise until you’re ready to really woo him with it. And you’d better woo him! You know as well as I do that he deserves the romancing.”
Her tone softened as she chuckled, trailing off with a sigh and a sort of wistful smile as she shook her head. “New York has been good to him. You have, too, I think. California was… a rough part in his life.”
Something in the way she phrased it got the investigative side of his brain thrumming, his curiosity piqued as he remembered what Derek said on the plane.
‘I know they forgave me, but… sometimes it’s hard to be around them and still be okay with myself, you know?’
The nosy part of him wanted to pry, to dig a little more, but his eyes flicked back to the window again, where Derek and all four of his siblings were doing a terrible job at acting like they weren't trying to stare him down.
“Whatever it is, I’m sure he’ll tell me when he’s ready.”
Apparently, that was the right answer—Nana’s face softened again as she smiled, nodding her head, beckoning Stiles into standing up. She put her hand in the crook of his elbow easily, steering them back toward the house in a way that allowed no room for compromise.
“You are going to be good for my Der-bear, I know it.”
“Oh, I mean, I hope so. Derek deserves that, and I definitely—“
“Just let him be good for you, too.”
She reached up and patted Stiles cheek as he stared at her, dumbfounded, automatically opening the door for her as she walked back into the house. His expression was mirrored in the matching expressions of slack-jawed shock from all five Hale siblings, all staring at Stiles as Nana started in on another family story that would be sure to embarrass Mark, or Laura, or anyone who wasn’t Derek.
He meant what he said, of course. Derek deserved someone who would be good for him.
Somehow, that was the problem here.
—————
“Stiles, you reek of nerves. All I can smell is nerves and bell peppers. It’s not a good smell. Are you going to tell me what you’re freaking out about, or what?”
Stiles jolted as Derek called him out so effortlessly, pulled out of the trance he had fallen into as he watched Derek work, pushing around some of the barbecue from the night prior with some fresh chopped veggies into a delightful spur of the moment stir fry.
Derek was also as dressed down as Stiles had ever seen him, in a light grey henley and a dark pair of jeans, and that was even more delightful than the stir fry.
“Wait, you—that’s just something you can do? Oh god, your entire family must have known how nervous I was yesterday, did they—“
“Stiles. Breathe.”
Right. Breathing. He could do that.
…. maybe.
The truth was, Stiles could honestly say that he was having a great time back in Beacon Hills.
Derek and his family were great, no lie, and fake relationship aside, the researcher in him was absolutely thriving seeing how a huge, well-established pack worked with one another. They were literally a well oiled machine, the personification of the old ‘it takes a village’ metaphor, and the only thing that amazed Stiles more than how well they worked together was how well they adapted to Stiles being there.
Of course, he thought a big part of that came from having the Alphas on his side—not just Derek, but Nana too.
(“I can’t believe she hugged you,” Laura had hissed after yet another glass of infused punch. “When she met my last boyfriend, she threw him off the porch.”
“Well, Stiles is a fragile little human,” Taylor had snorted, ignoring the way Stiles smacked his arm, “and Hank was a major, prolapsed asshole.”
“Well yeah, but that’s not the point!”)
As great as Derek and his family was though, getting to come home and surprise his dad early… well, there was no place on the planet he would rather be than wrapped in a signature Stilinski hug, the kind of hug where you held on just a little longer than you needed to so you can pretend you definitely weren’t crying.
He got to watch a game with his dad, he got to sleep in his old, lumpy-ass childhood bed, he got to make breakfast in his mom’s kitchen.
So yeah. Great time.
Or at least, it had been, until a text rolled through after he kissed his dad goodbye that morning.
der-bear: Do you want to come over for lunch? Nana has everyone out of the house, Mom and Uncle Peter showed up this morning and he’s already driving everyone crazy.
sent: sure man. want me to bring anything? :)
der-bear: Don’t worry about it. Besides, I figure we should talk before the bonfire anyway.
And just like that, something brought around a cloud to rain on Stiles’ parade.
“Is it about tonight?” Derek asked, and if Stiles’ hadn’t been so laser focused on his cooking technique (his arms, okay, he was staring at Derek’s arms) he probably would have missed the way Derek hesitated when he asked, like he was afraid of the answer.
He picked himself up off of the barstool at the island in their gigantic kitchen, leaning against the counter closer to Derek, reaching in to pluck a chunk of onion out of the pan, skillfully avoiding the swat from Derek’s wooden spoon. “What do you mean?”
“Well, you… You know we’re looking forward to having you with us, right?” Derek asked, spooning some of the food onto two separate plates, using his claws to rip two fresh chunks of bread off of a loaf. “But if you don’t… I mean, I just don’t want you to feel like you have to be there if you don’t want to.”
Stiles frowned as he accepted one of the plates, pulling the smaller chunk of bread off of one of Derek’s claws, mulling his next words over. “As long as you want me there I’ll be there,” Stiles said slowly, because there really was no way to politely say that Stiles would rather throw himself into the sun before his mythical lore studying ass missed out on observing pack activity on a blue moon.
“Why would you think I didn’t want you there?” Derek asked, looking like he was offended at the very notion, sliding a fork to Stiles as he sat down at the countertop, that offended look only growing as Stiles snorted.
“I dunno, I thought you might have changed your mind about it. Dude, you sent me a ‘we should talk’ text. I’m no expert, but I know that nothing good follows a ‘we should talk’ text,” Stiles said around a mouth full of bread, but any degree of playful levity he had gone for was sapped out of his voice the moment he saw Derek look back down at his plate.
“That, uh. I do think we should talk, but not about that. Stiles, I...”
Ah, fuck. Derek’s ears were pink again, and for once, Stiles thought that was a bad thing.
Stiles did his best not to panic as he thought through things, wondering what he had fucked up, because he just knew he had fucked up a little something. Maybe he had come on a little too strong last night, maybe he had gotten too comfortable with his crush, maybe—
“I was thinking that maybe… we shouldn’t be faking this anymore.”
—or maybe, he had fucked up a whole lot of everything.
Stiles felt his heart sink through his shoes as he swallowed his bread, his appetite suddenly gone. He brushed his hands on his jeans, giving a few short nods, swallowing again as he pushed back from the table a little bit. He thought for a moment that he should argue against it, but Derek had a sad puppy expression splashed across his face, and Stiles wasn’t strong against that on a good day.
“Oh.”
He could feel Derek’s eyes tracking him as he started to move, standing up and starting an easy track around the kitchen, flexing his fingers before he rubbed his palm with his thumbs, an old habit he had thought he had kicked back when he graduated from Berkeley.
“I think, uh, maybe you should wait until you’re back in New York to tell your family?” Stiles started, missing the tiny smile on Derek’s face before it melted into a look of confusion. “You should tell them I broke up with you, not the other way around, I don’t mind being the bad guy,” he added, staring down at his hands.
“Wait, Stiles—“
“No, seriously, it’s fine,” Stiles interrupted, putting a smile back on his face, because he knew this was going to be coming at some point. Derek had made up their entire relationship, and Stiles had worked hard to remember that the reality of it was… that it wasn’t reality. He was the one with the inconvenient crush, he was the one who had gotten stupid. This was all on him, and taking the high road to bow out gracefully would be too.
Or, at least, it should have been. But Derek had abandoned his seat as well, halfway following Stiles in his trail around the kitchen, putting his arm out against a countertop to stop Stiles at a turn.
“I said I wanted to stop faking, Stiles.”
Hell, when had Derek gotten so close to him? Stiles blinked as he backed up against the counter, Derek’s arms closing him in, and suddenly he was getting an up close and personal look at Derek’s lips, and his eyes, and the way the blush was going back up his ears, and—
...why was Derek blushing?
“I never said anything about wanting you to leave.”
But why would Stiles be staying if… oh. Oh.
Realization dawned on Stiles’ face as Derek blushed and looked down, moving his hands a little bit closer against the counter, and Stiles felt a shiver run down his spine as he felt Derek’s thumb settle right along his hip. He had to clear his throat before he could speak, swallowing down the hope that was threatening to bubble over, chewing on his lip as he put one hand on Derek’s chest, the other gently tipping his head back to look him in the eye.
“Dude, if you’re saying what I think you’re saying, you gotta spell it out, I’ve had a crush on you for like forever and if I’m mis-reading this—”
“I told you. I’m your boyfriend, don’t call me dude.”
Stiles laughed again, elation making him feel light and giddy, finally breaking eye contact with Derek as he felt his own blush burn through the back of his neck.
“Stay, Stiles. You belong here. With me.”
Rather than even try to form a coherent response, Stiles dropped one of his hands, cheeks still a ruddy color as he looped a finger into one of the belt loops on Derek’s designer jeans, pulling him just that much closer.
“Derek?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m going to kiss you now.”
“Oh, thank God—"
—————
Yeah, Stiles thought hours later, still feeling the warmth of Derek’s smile against his lips as howls sounded off around the Hale House, moonlight swirling around him from the vantage point he had on the porch.
This was exactly where he belonged.
#teen wolf#sterek#stiles stilinski#derek hale#hale family#teen wolf fic#fake dating#everyone lives#two halves of a whole idiot#this is actually my first sterek fic ever lmao HOW WILD
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