#and they were supposed to turn like from their...60 to 20 lol

[shen-mu]

'Let's have our last dance together, love' art for a fic by @emiliaexists <З ty, i cried.

[sabertoothwalrus]

I'm going to think out loud about the dungeon meshi ages for a sec

I'm going to preface this by saying that this is based on my existing knowledge, and fact checking is difficult because there is A LOT of contentious research out there.

First of all, I think a lot of people come at this from a modern lens, forgetting the context that this is fantasy medieval era. this is fiction. on top of that, this is specifically Ryoko Kui's understanding of medieval era aging. plus fantasy. So before anyone comes at me with a bunch of 'ermmmm actualy's just consider that I don't really care and also it might not matter in this context lol

as far as the "age of maturity" assigned for each race, something I don't see many people talk about is that "teenagers" are a fairly recent concept. For a long time, you were either considered A Kid or Not A Kid. but this doesn't necessarily mean kids were more/less developed then, just our cultural expectations for certain age groups have changed.

Laios says the age of maturity for tallmen is 16. I don't think that means 16 year olds in the dungeon meshi universe are necessarily "more mature" than modern 16 year olds, but moreso that they have more responsibilities. However, things like medicine, smoking, drinking, sun exposure, physical activity, etc all affect age, so it's possible that developmentally they're closer to modern 18 year olds? Izutsumi is 17 (less than two weeks from turning 18, actually), and very much acts like a modern 17 year old.

The age of maturity for half-foots is 14. Chilchuck was 13 when he got married and had his first two children. Even though, at age 29, he's the equivalent of a modern 50 year old, I don't think he was That much more developed at 13 than a tallman. I think if half-foot 14 is equal to tallman 16, then Chilchuck was Pretty Damn Young for a parent LMAO. Even if you're generous and say tallman 16 is a modern 18, he still would've been younger than that.

The long-lived races are interesting. Marcille is obviously a unique case, and not a lot of this applies to her. We do know what Senshi was like as a minor (miner, lol), and he seemed like a modern 15ish, considering he was 36 and dwarf maturity is 40. I think it'd be really interesting to delve into how a culture functions with people being developmentally adolescent for soooooo long. Imagine middle school lasting 20 years. that would fucking suck. I suppose it makes sense why long-lived races are so patronizing.

Moving onto lifespans, I want to emphasize that they're average lifespans. Even in the manga, they say some half-foots live to 100, it's just rare. So it's less that a tallman 60 year old is "older" than a modern 60 year old, it's that it's easier to keep people alive for longer nowadays. Modern medicine is a BIG contributor. Dental health as well, considering how much your health is affected by your diet (and how much the action of chewing alone aids in digestion). Curious to know what the FUCK elven dentistry is like.

It also makes me wonder if half-foots would have a longer average lifespan if they weren't like, used for bait and treated so poorly, but half-foot 29 does seem to be middle-aged for half-foots. so who knows!

In that vein, I don't know if I can see Mithrun quite making it to 400 😬 like, his experience as a dungeon lord took a lot out of him quite literally, and he's doing exceptionally well despite it! I imagine he'd eventually start to develop a lot of heart problems if he doesn't have them already. Perhaps early-onset dementia. His memory seems still quite intact (he corrects Kabru on his story's accuracy) and he doesn't act like, lobotomized. He doesn't seem forgetful or confused, and he has a sense of humor/sarcasm still. It's mostly his task initiation that's been affected.

I almost want to say that mana affinity could affect long-lived races' lifespans, except dwarves have very poor tolerance for mana, so it's probably not that.

okay anyway I didn't really have a point to this post so I'm just gonna end my rambling here

[oodlyenough]

alright i finished aai1-4 (aka turnabout reminiscence... i think... all the turnabout ep titles blur into mush in my brain. case number supremacy). the existence of a case featuring baby franziska and bratworth was like a solid 60% of the reason i played this game to begin with, and it was indeed my fave case so far by a mile. the miles + franziska interactions and callisto yew were worth the price of admission.

i loved having franziska around as the weirdgirl and, like i said in a previous post, i thought being thirteen made her writing here a lot more believable and funny than in the earlier case where you're theoretically dealing with a post-trilogy adult. i thought the (relatively one-sided) hypercompetitive relationship between her and edgeworth was hilarious and this little kid running around being a total menace was like. yeah. that checks out. lmao.

yeah man why did you think she was here?

also, as a fic writer eternally fixated on what characters call each other, especially in a franchise where everyone has a custom nickname lol, i thought it was interesting that while both adult and baby franziska use 'miles' and 'miles edgeworth', baby franziska defaults to 'miles' most of the time while adult franziska uses his full name most of the time. i could get a whole fic out of that, your brain is fascinating franziska ilu

callisto rules. i knew from vague fandom context she would be the villain but I did not know she would extend beyond this one case, so i'm excited. aside from being funny as fuck i am genuinely interested in her motives as well, she is clearly aware of corruption on the prosecution side but it remains to be seen how much she actually ... cares about that... vs how much is personal vendetta (for her sister?) vs whatever agenda of her own. presumably she was lying about being the yatagarasu? anyway. interested to see that develop

queen shit, drag him

edgeworth's writing... i don't know. i can understand the rationale of not wanting to make the player sit through a case of him being a corrupt douchebag. but the result was that I found only nominal difference between how they wrote this 20 y/o jackass and how they write adult edgeworth in the other cases. which i think rather undermines his trilogy arc. I don't know that I really believe Bratworth turning things upside down to clear Gumshoe's name, instead of pushing for the easy conviction and moving on. am I supposed to believe that this happened and then he just... stopped doing that for the rest of his career up until aa1. like this is great and all but he's about to run a clusterfuck of a trial against terry fawles where he definitely did not Find The Truth lmao

cheer up man the next one is way worse

lastly on a more positive note i'm continually surprised and entertained how every case has different women of different demographics flirting with edgeworth and he is continually either baffled or horrified by it. i guess i figured without phoenix being around in these games they'd ease up on the gay subtext. they have not.

unfortunately this means it's time for the last case, and all i ever hear about it is that it's long and tedious. hooray! at the pace i'm going i'll be lucky to complete aai2 before the new trilogy in january, so i guess TGAA will be my palette cleanser after SOJ... which is maybe for the best anyway.

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

re parent regret article.... recently got my mom to admit she and my dad are deeply unhappy and the only reason they got married and had kids (in their early 20s, and it has dictated every moment of their lives since) is because it was what was expected of them and they felt like it was just the thing to do ... its very upsetting to think of how unhappy and unfulfilled my parents are but at the same time its kind of freeing because I understand a lot of their actions better now and their inability to raise us and give me the care I needed. this year I am older than my parents were when they had my oldest sibling and I kind of feel like im older than them now because theyve never fully grown past that point at least not as individuals. ya I suppose everyone has their paths in life and it all fits together and works and means something but it is very sad to realize your childhood was painful because your parents were really just not suited to be parents and couldn't have done any better. im trying to not be weighed down by their lack of self actualization and to be an example for them by manifesting my life in the way I want despite them being upset by it, and to encourage them to become real people now that theyre 60.. umm ya sorry your inbox has become my therapy sessions recently it just feels so much better to confess these things anonymously and write it all out to someone instead of trying to explain to someone face to face and have it deal with their responses. plus i think u understand a lot of my issues although objectively our lives are quite different! anyway yeah hope you have a nice day!!!! xoxo 2012 :3

ilu <3 i relate to much of this i will detail my thoughts below , im glad my inbox can be of use to u i believ The Confessional is a very necessary function in society it can be so transcendent to get something off your chest w/o having to affect your personal life in any way ^^ and i did have a super nice day ty i hope u did too..<3 :readmore:

it is really crazy to think about the pressure ppl face to start families , seems to be less prevalent now but yeah even 20-30 yrs ago it was just, What You Do.. for my parents, they were in love, and i think they rly did want kids, they were together for 5 years before doing it they planned it out, i DO believe they were soulmates. but then once the reality set in idrk there was just this disconnect. my dad was the more nurturing parent, and he had kids from a prior marriage so he knew wat he was in for, i think he missed my brothers a lot so he had perspective. i assume anyway. but he was also major alcoholic which i thought was normal for so long (in england it is i spose). that took up a lot of his time. i know so little about him or his inner workings its quite torturous to me lol.

and my mom is still alive but i know so little about her too, other than stuff i learned thru drunken outbursts. when i try to ask her anything remotely personal or emotional now she stonewalls me so hard :/ she's always just been closed. her childhood was Horrific tho like both her parents were still minors when she was born, her mom is a WW2 orphan and her dad was a delinquent forced to enlist in the navy instead of being sent to juvie. all the stuff she HAS revealed to me abt her life is absolutely bats**t. its awful like i genuinely can not feel a single morsel of bitterness towards my mom knowing wat she's been thru.

that being said i WAS extremely angry at her for a big portion of my life its been a journey to unravel. but at this point i feel so much forgiveness idek how i got here or when. but i love her unconditionally! i also feel that my moms self actualization was rly stunted, not even by having kids but by my dads death, and being left with these kids she has to care for alone, oh god if i try to imagine how she felt it turns my insides to stone. like it really fractured her soul and made existing problems spiral out of control. although that being said she is doing WAY better now in comparison to the past, im rly proud of her. when we talk i try to always encourage her like u say..

really the best medicine is being able to zoom out and view the big picture of Life, not just your life but how all our lives fit together, when you zoom out you can spot the patterns find the order in the chaos. for ages n ages i cldnt understand the reason everything in my life was hell while all these other ppl i knew seemed to have it so normal. Nowadays i can understand how it lead me here, the trajectory and timing of everything, it brought me a lot of EXPerience i can use to help others..Even just by having this blog where i can talk about vulnerable topics , ppl tell me it helps them, i begin to see a new sense of value in my endured sufferings. if i feel like im healing someone that heals me ..

thanx for the msg :] ermm i hope my response dont come off as traumadumping or something LOL i write this all with a matter-of-fact tone in mind. just explaining some stuff for anyone who may need it. hope u have a good night 2012-chan keep shining bright for your family.. <3pmd9

[zonkutonshorrifyingpeenie]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

tagged in by the lovely @borealopelta thanks bb! <3 <3

How many works do you have on AO3?

9

What's your total AO3 word count?

23,958

What fandoms do you write for?

i've primarily written for powerwolf with my extremely-specific-furry-au, but I've also written for AFK arena, fnaf, and there's a couple bakugan ones that I want to try and get back to working on as well, or indeed, working on writing in general ;A;

Top five fics by kudos?

Light's On - fnaf sb - 81 kudos

Reunions Sacrifice - afk arena - 60 kudos

A Were's First - powerwolf - 25 kudos

It's 3am... - powerwolf - 16 kudos

Charles' Nightmare - powerwolf - 11 kudos

Do you respond to comments?

If I actively remember to, yes.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Definitely A Were's Last, which was almost exclusively written to induce tears in... two people at most lol

sometimes you just gotta write non-canon no-point angst shit ya feel?

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Honestly, I haven't written many if any explictly happy fic endings, they seem to lean more melancholic most of the time which definitely doesn't say anything about my mental state what are you talking about

but, Sleeping On Your Alpha Can Be Something That's Very Personal, Actually and It's 3am... would probably count as at least my least sad fic ends

Do you get hate on fics?

Thankfully no. but some of my fic-connected posting has certainly garnered some strangely passionate responses.

Do you write smut?

Yep

Craziest crossover?

None of my fics are crossovers

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge, and if they're desperate enough to steal from me, I think I'd feel sorry for them

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not explictly, no. The closest I've gotten to anything like co-writing has been like... a couple of discord fic-lore convos that turned into semi-writings and also all that rp shit i did over a decade ago.

All time favorite ship

I don't exactly have a metric for rating any of my ships above the other, they all grab me by the throat in differing ways

though, by genre at least, i do gravitate towards gay old men, so, take that as you will

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Buddy I could just list my entire writing folder here and I doubt I would actually be exaggerating T-T

The mental illness has gripped me far too hard the last few years...

But, there's always hope, right?

What are your writing strengths?

environment descriptions and turn-of-phrase, I suppose. I like to think I'm fairly ok at getting a general vibe across in the... 12 paragraphs before i get to even a speck of dialogue lol

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

My monolingual ass could never. I'd be too afraid of fucking it up

First fandom you wrote in?

the first thing i remember writing for was fuckn like... an mmo game. i think it was the Sacred one when that was around... i think??

but that was purely written in random linebook when i was a child and didn't understand the concept of fanfiction yet

the first thing i POSTED anywhere was probably bakugan or homestuck. I genuinely can't recall exact order, but I do know for certain fact that I worked on this one bakugan fic for far FAR too long during highschool recess and lunch breaks

Favorite fic you've written?

In terms of published, definitely AWF, my beloved domestic furry au that is definitely not semi-dead-in-the-water-it's-fine ignore my tears

unpublished, there's certainly a few that I'm having a very pleasant and fun time with writing, even if the going is very slow.

If you were forced to write only one genre for the rest of your life (like James Patterson lol) what would you want it to be?

Probably Fantasy or Mythology, lot of wiggle-room within that, and I tend to lean more fantastical in my worlds and such anyhow.

I'm gonna tag in @deerfests I reckon! And open-invite ofr anyone else that wants to hop in as well!

[kyogre-blue]

Read chapter 11-20 of Disaster Class Hero. (2% completion lol)

There's a lot of interesting points in general, but worth noting is that novel vs manhwa definitely has a difference in tone due to the things that got dropped or toned down. The novel has some comedy from Lee Geon being kind of absurd, but the manhwa is more humorous in general, especially since they remove some of the bloodier violence, a lot of mentions about how oppressive the temples are, and how wildly incompetent the saints are without Lee Geon.

My biggest other takeaways:

Lee Geon is mentioned as being 25 before the Tower, but looking 50-60 due to speeding up his aging from burning his life energy to fight. Post Tower, he looks like he's about 18 and repeatedly compared to a high schooler. I thought the art for the novel and the promo chapter was twink Lee Geon, but it's actually true. Tbh I'm gonna quietly scrub that from my brain, I can't deal with it.

Hugo is stated to look late 30s, early 40s (so barely younger than his actual age??), and thinking about them side by side is hilarious.

When mentioning how he doesn't know what smartphones are initially, Lee Geon thinks he's from 2005, which would be only five years after the calamity invasion started. The manhwa dated his and Hugo's first meeting as 30 years ago, so something mysterious going on with the timeline.

Hugo has a photo that shows Yooha and Sungjae, ages supposedly 9 and 5 respectively. Sungjae is 16 in present day and turns 17 partway in. So that would mean Yooha has to be 20 at minimum. Given that Hugo and Jiwoo were supposed to have met after the tower (iirc?)... I suppose everyone might be rounding down when talking about how the tower was twenty years ago. Otherwise, I do recall that Koreans sometimes count age differently, and you basically need to reduce it by one, so maybe it's that?

Novel does explain why Hugo mistook a random person for Lee Geon. He specifically expected Lee Geon to look even older than before the tower, like in his 70s, so he singles out an old man who also happens to be a tourist wearing a replica of Lee Geon's mask and even makeup to mimic his scars. So it's extremely understandable that he doesn't get it. Actually, even the divine gods who don't distinguish people based on their faces don't recognize Lee Geon, so he's basically entirely different from his previous self.

Worth noting is that Lee Geon seems to genuinely not understand how different he is from everyone else and what he can expect from others, to the point that I'm kind of surprised he hasn't killed someone accidentally by misjudging his strength. (my fanfic brain: bodyswap shenanigans with a touch of angst, yes??)

[fresiants]

I found a character poll on twitter few weeks ago and I can't believe so many marauder fans were shocked that Severus is more popular than Barty and Rosier.

this is honestly so depressing, but i know i shouldn't be surprised, the other day i too found a twt poll that put remus/severus and remus/regulus against each other and remus/regulus won by SO MANY votes! i wanted to drink a whole bottle of hemlock. i couldn't believe it. that rich twink doesn't have a fucking personality he will Never be as nuanced as severus as a character, or as impactful!

"Hide Kreacher, I'll do anything" "Kreacher? After all this time?" "Always"

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH I LAUGHED AT THIS, I CHOKED ON NOTHING 😭😭😭 i'm sure you're aware of people shipping regulus and james? before i stumbled again upon this abomination of a fandom, i was rather open minded to the idea of shipping anything as long as it's age appropriate, but i just don't have the patience for ships involved fabricated personalities where one of the parties involved's ENTIRE personality was snatched from My favorite character.

but its as you depict it! there IS a prejudiced and shallow component in the way people choose their faves, for the lack of personality and depth to not matter when the character is supposed to be "attractive". the whole "making snape to be ugly" always rubbed me the wrong way, for the poor and neglected kid to be bullied and antagonized, and everyone justifying it TO THIS DAY, favoring their rich, "supposedly conventionally attractive" main characters? from r*wling it shouldn't be surprising, but from everyone else to run away with it, justifying every ugly action from james or sirius, even lily? then they act as if they're any better than r*wling herself 🤡

i've been reluctantly into hp again for at least two or three months and every experience outside of the snape fanbase has been so exhausting. loving remus and find content of him that doesn't involve sirius or james or that doesn't misinterpret his character is also hard, i really can only trust snupin stans and absolutely nobody else 😔

I too found a twt poll that put remus/severus remus/regulus against each other and remus/regulus won by SO MANY votes!

Lol Idk if they did this out of spite but I found a huge ship poll with thousands of votes few months ago and remus/regulus was in bottom five. I guess they were upset that Snupin at least managed to be in top 20, while Snily and Snegulus were in top 10 lmao. Here's the link if you wanna check it out.

I'm sure you're aware of people shipping regulus and james

Ngl jegulus is just Wallmart jeverus with Walmart James. Idk how they got so popular in a short period of time. They have no interacting whatsoever in the canon lol.

favoring their rich, "supposedly conventionally attractive" main characters

Because they're shallow-minded and there's just no way to change their opinions. They are too deep in the fanfiction rabid hole they started treating it like canon. According to them, ugly people aren't allowed to make any mistakes. This is the type of discrimination we see in real life as well. I expect them to be better considering how they always turn their favs into gay feminist icons but well... I guess when they mention feminist, they mean ugly people exclusivity radical feminist.

Loving Remus and finding content of him that doesn't involve Sirius or James or that doesn't misinterpret his character is also hard

I barely follow any Remus' blogs/content creator anymore because whenever i search for them, at least 60% of them contain Wolfstar, while the other 40% MIGHT contain Severus' bashing. I'd rather stick and wait for Snupin shippers to drop more Remus Lupin contents. Well.. I guess some Remadora fans are fine but there's just too many Snaters out there. I'd rather take care of my mental health and not get involved with these people.

[twixtandshout]

@sparkingoverload So! Wild’s DnD sheet. :3c

I’ve statted him as a modified half-elf variant. I went with Eladrin first, because seasonal Even More Fey elf felt right – I love the idea of him having leafy ear-tips and other planty offshoots that change with the seasons, but being stuck in the castle and Zelda’s royal retinue and court year-round, maybe trimming those bits so as to fit in uniform or else just quietly wilting/molding because the environment really isn’t hospitable for his wildness – but he really didn’t need to be able to teleport in a rush of flame whenever he feels like it when I’m already lining things up to give him a more reasonable teleportation option. I gave him the basic Eladrin suite besides that, Aquan language proficiency thanks to growing up in Zora’s Domain, and then stole the half-elf’s extra skill proficiencies instead of teleportation. (He also knows Goblin and Celestial.)

Choosing backgrounds was a little fun because of the whole amnesia thing. Assuming this was post-Shrine, I went with the folk hero background, which gives him animal handling and survival proficiencies, land vehicle proficiencies, and a tool. I chose chef’s tools, which went well with the iron pot the background starts you off with! Also the various cooking-related feats I gave him, which I’ll get to later. The main trait the background gives him is rustic hospitality, meaning he blends in easily with common people and is generally well-liked, enough for them to do things for him if it won’t put them in harm’s way. (That’s a trait he shares with Twilight!) I didn’t make a tenth sheet for pre-Calamity Wild, but if I were gonna I’d probably go with some unholy amalgamation of the soldier and knight backgrounds.

Equipment-wise, I’ve given him twice-enhanced leather armor (thanks Great Fairies), manymany weapons, and a very kludged Slate, complete with runes. It’s very OP, but then again, he is level 20, and it’s a one-of-a-kind item that serves as system ID. It would be fairly easy for a concerned GM to have a Yiga or whatever steal it and let there be Consequences tm.

Despite the amnesia, I’ve decided that he retained a couple levels in the fighter class. Haven’t made any decisions about which levels came before and which came after, but either way, he’s got five levels as a Champion-class fighter, which is just enough to give him an improved crit threshold, an extra attack per turn, one-time HP regen, and bonuses for fighting with archery. The rest of his levels are, as mentioned, in fey wanderer ranger. He can deal extra damage to an enemy he marks in a fight, sense the location(s) of magical creatures within a mile, travel easily even through difficult terrain, melt into nature to become magically invisible for a turn, and reroll low damage rolls when he attacks with two-handed weapons. Thanks to his fey associations, he not only has advantage on charm/fear saves (and a bonus to any charisma check!) but can reflect the triggering charm/fear effect back on the caster. He can also deal extra psychic damage on practically every attack, and can’t be tracked except through magic unless he wants to be.

Cool spells:

On/Off (cantrip): Turns electronic devices on or off at a range of 60′.

Sudden Awakening: I love giving this to him, Legend, and Time, lol. None of them are gonna get caught in comas again if they can help it!!

Goodberry: Create a handful of magic berries. Goes well in cooking – well, presumably; I’m not sure there are any rules for how adding magic hp+ berries to hp+ cooking works, but it’s nice thematically at least.

Alarm: Good for setting up perimeters around camp! And for avoiding getting a Yiga surprise.

Summon Vehicle: Master Cycle, go! Plays very nicely with that land vehicle proficiency from his background.

Conjure Barrage: Technically you’re supposed to throw(??) a piece of ammunition to create a barrage of it that rains down on your target, but I think it’s way cooler to draw back one arrow and fire a whole 60′ cone. Being sick as hell is really the only reason I need for this one, but it also kinda maps to his whole air-archery thing.

Freedom of Movement: The toad cannot be contained. This would let him basically clip out of any restraint, including shackles. I can totally see the Yiga taking him and some of the others hostage and locking them up in a dungeon somewhere except. oops.

Summon Beast: Technically he shouldn’t get this one but I say it’s okay because it only summons Twilight.

Misty Step: Comes from the fey wanderer subclass. Twice per day, he can teleport <30′ for free, and as a bonus he can bring one other willing person with him! Tell me you can’t see him and Hyrule sneaking off like this.

The Observant feat gives him lipreading proficiency and bonuses to passive investigation/perception, and the Stealthy feat not only gives him stealth expertise but also the ability to openly move up to 10′ without being spotted so long as he ends the turn under cover. Excepting an ability score increase to Wisdom, his last two feats concern food and health recovery! The Chef feat lets him cook for the party during short rests to give everyone HP-replenishing food, and the Remarkable Recovery feat means he gets extra HP any time he regains any and bounces back easily from the brink of death.

I’ve given him the Boon of Peerless Aim, which lets him basically auto-hit one shot per short rest, and gave him the Champions’ gifts as spells (one cast per day free) instead of a blessing. He’s also got homebrew mechanics for ADHD, autism, scarring, chronic pain, and PTSD.

[pineapplee-sea]

LOL.

Just accidentally found out that diagnosis about which my mom had the whole "omg the head of your femur is inflamed and you almost had a narcosis" conversation with me when I was 5 was actually... LCPD

NONE of the doctors told me that I'm supposed to not do any weight bearing activities on my affected leg for TWO YEARS. Meanwhile my doctor told me to "rest in bed for 3 months" and it will be good. Went back to being a kid (running jumping) and dancing right after the 3 months.

Luckily I turned out probably quite well. Only remembered this shit when I casually mentioned "oh when we were doing this rotation my hip really hurt" and she went all seriousness going "jeez if it's that painful maybe it's best for you to never do that again"

My mom NEVER told me anything about it (well not her fault she doesn't know I would turn out to run 20 fucking kilometers a week). The doctor probably NEVER informed my mom about long term prognosis and different treatment plans and everything.

Turns out I'll be more prone to hip problems later in my life. Turns out I may be more likely to get a hip replacement when I'm in my 60s. Turns out I should've had physiotherapy at that time and be observed about how my femur and hip socket are growing.

I am so mad. I am so fucking mad right now.

All these years I thought there was something wrong with me.

Feeling my affected leg was slightly shorter (turns out the patients' affected leg is on average 1-1.5cm shorter).

Feeling my affected leg is weaker and there's muscle imbalances between two legs (turns out it could).

Feeling that the knee of my affected leg was more prone to problems (turns out it might be affected).

I'm so mad. So mad right now. For 18 fucking years I did not know about this. I thought it was long healed. How tf was I supposed to know that the prognosis depends on how my hip was developing (which on average finishes at around 14 lol).

Having this is unfair enough. Not even being properly treated is even more horrible.

Fuck the doctors. Fuck them.

(And I'm going back to my home country where this fucking shit happened and I have NO IDEA where I can get help from. I have no idea where physio clinics are in my or my partner's city. I have no idea which hospital I should go to. Yet this. Fuck.)

I'm just hoping that my running is not affecting it and will not affect it. Fuck. This is so fucking tough. That made me cry.

[horn-of-leo]

i feel like i talk too negatively when going on rants here so i wanted to share good news :D

I rewatched the whole series again with my sib and it was honestly great to sort of go through the rollercoaster again, especially because she's never watched past the Sanctuary arc(I'm the only one who's watched it full through) so it was cool to experience it again with someone reacting for the first time plus we've made so many funny jokes out of the whole run

I'm gonna just be talking about the whole experience in here of what we've watched (cuz it will be the whole series)

Sanctuary Arc:

The good ol '80s anime, my sibs and I grew up with the English dub(the ADV one), and sometimes I see people saying it's bad but I don't think so, honestly tho this dub was probably the reason I had no clue everyone was supposed to apparently be young teenagers/adults since everyone voicing in this ver is obviously a 30+ year old man, I mean some characters do sound like they recruited the first guy they found at the office to fill in for the role and probably only told them the name of the character but never showed them what the actual character looked/should sound like(*cough* Camus) but other than that I think everyone does a great job. idk probably bias since I grew up with it but I'm telling you that no other dub will go as ham as the ADV one. It's such a shame they didn't at least get to finish the Sanctuary arc and only got up to 60 episodes. I actually got a little sad when we finished out the eng dub episodes too lol and I know there's the other one but I ain't watching it

ANYWAYS, it's honestly very funny to look at all of the fillers for this arc and just know the anime did not know what type of series it was going to be since the beginning, it's like they tried to do a villain of the week format since they had the basis of the mad grab for the Sagittarius helmet that was also apparently the most powerful cloth in the world and it turns you into a super saint that could destroy the world if taken into the wrong hands, and it's the only gold cloth in the world...until like another 20 eps in where they have to start writing around what they had and go with the manga continuity as best as they could

I really do enjoy the fillers that they have for this tho, because it not only gets the main five to like chill from doing the main plot for five seconds but it gets to add more character/bonding between them. One thing I really liked is that there is more development of Saori reaching out to them and making up for how she's treated them in the past since they're all already on edge with her since she was so spoiled and treated them like garbage when they were all kids. So to see them all gradually warming up to each other is great and it makes it more plausible that they'd want to still keep fighting for each other (as compared to the manga where they still hate her even into the Sanctuary arc and they only arrived to fight for their own personal reasons and tolerate her at best because she's Athena, it's so disheartening to read actually, like WHAT'S THE ACTUAL POINT THEN IF THEY DON'T EVEN LIKE HER???)

Another thing is that I really like is how they handled Shiryu's character arc when he lost his sight. As compared to the handwave from the manga, he's greatly affected by what's happened and might have to come to terms that he'll never be able to fight again beside everyone when something like the fight against the Sanctuary is so near. And it's a huge blow to the team as well that they basically just disband right there for a couple of seconds (but then get back a few eps later since the Algol vs. Shiryu fight was earlier and they still had a few more silver saints to get through).

So when the anime cuts back to Shiryu, it's shown he can't adapt to his life right away and is still suffering from ptsd of both losing his sight and the fear of being left behind that he's honestly lost hope that he'll ever recover. But after having his fight with Ohko(anime-only guy he's trained with as a kid) it kickstarts him find his drive to fight again and that even if he is blind, he's found out that it's not the end for him as a saint and his life in general too.

I did enjoy the other fillers about the others doing stuff too, though poor Shun having nothing to his name tho😭(he deserved to have something at least but I guess his character arc is a slow burn since he doesn't really develop as a character until near the end of the arc itself/later arcs)

Anyways on to where the ball really drops at the 12 houses arc:

No need to individually talk about every single battle lol cuz that would get so long and I don't really have anything else new to add while rewatching.

Personally, I think there's quite a dip to where the arc kind of peaks the first time around the Leo-Virgo temple where I start to tune out then basically get interested back around the last three houses where everyone starts to die for real. It doesn't help really that before Shaka's fight, we just have two long episodes of Ikki getting his ass beat and Shaka personally making sure Ikki is getting his ass beat which is a little funny and he was so petty for that.

But anyway after Shaka, it starts to drag a little going on with the Libra house then with Milo having the best anime original fight against Seiya/Shiryu to having the ugliest episode of the whole series.

Also sorry, I only liked the part where Seiya and Shiryu fight him, the actual fight between Hyoga and Milo I start to tune out. Honestly though, while the Milo vs. Hyoga is definitely one of the most disconnected fights of the arc, I did appreciate the fight cause it still is good for Hyoga's development (plus its probably to make up for him doing basically nothing the whole arc until now).

Skipping ahead to the fight against Saga, I remembered that Seiya has basically checked out since Aioria's fight(which I cannot blame since he did get super fucked up during so) but that last hour really hangs on for a good 6 episodes.

I think it was sad we didn't actually get to have the flashback where Saga turns evil since the anime team(godbless them) had to make up the craziest shit to fill in for the story, only for Kurumada to cancel out every single story plot they wrote so they couldn't possibly ever really try to even say it was Saga who was the pope for the last 13 years. Since they introduced Pope Ares as the first Pope's evil brother who has just recently took over shortly after Seiya left after earning his armor and was straight up evil for no good reason that it seems almost stupid any of the Gold Saints could even think he was a good person when the first thing acknowledged by both Aioria and Marin when he was introduced is that he was pure evil. Which isn't even the start of how they tried to write around that plot point for the anime afterwards where it gets even more confusing of where Saga really comes in the picture and basically settling that since it was a good 60 episodes ago, you'd basically have forgotten the lore they've written up to let it slide, which is fair tbh.

Also, I think the anime has a better conclusion to this arc since everyone joins up together to jump Saga at the end. Plus Saori got to roast him too so that was cool.

Asgard Arc

It felt very bittersweet to move on from the Sanctuary arc into Asgard. I wanted to give this arc a chance, unfortunately I still couldn't find myself really getting into it. Plus the subs are very bad around this part so it was hard to know what the characters names were and ultimately we just skipped around until there was scene that was either originally in the manga/final parts of the arc that carries on into the next one.

I guess it's not great for group watching when none of us are really interested since the changes of the artstyle/armor designs is a little disheartening to see. Plus the pacing was kinda of not great(?) like the cuts were way too fast or skipped to a wildly different scene from the last that we couldn't tell if we like missed an episode or it was the opposite where we just sat simmering at a scene of the characters acting like dragon ball characters for a good 5+ minutes for padding.

Personally, I do think the character designs are super great though and probably the only thing I wished that happened was that they all lived so their back stories wouldn't be completely useless to know (tho ig Siegfred could die since it had some reason to it, tho it's still kind of dumb how it happened) but I'd maybe have to go back to watch it myself to maybe appreciate it more but who knows? I just wish there are better subs out there that I could probably stand watching it.

Poseidon Arc:

Kind of a lukewarm arc tbh, I don't feel like I have anything else to add really on this rewatch.

I have my gripes about certain characters/stories in this arc and they've made some changes I definitely don't like. Main offender is the scene where Seiya take Poseidon's trident to shield Saori when this scene was originally supposed to be Kanon's redemption scene and ultimately it adds nothing because Seiya just walks it off. Though the only reason why I can guess they made this change was because I assume it would confuse people when Kanon comes back in the Hades arc and it turns out he survived but it wasn't known then and that arc wasn't animated until a good 10 years later. And I'm pretty sure the anime already knew it was wrapping up by then, so they chose to have Seiya take the blow and not seemingly kill Kanon and instead just left it more ambiguous if he was able to make it out of Atlantis or not when they sealed Poseidon. Though it's just my speculation.

It was a little sad to finally finish the whole 80s anime but I think it's good they at least got to finish up til the Poseidon arc. But other than that I think that they had a good wrap up with everyone being happy in the end and they gave Shaina great drip when they're all out in their normal clothes again, so bonus for that ending.

Hades Arc:

Man, this one was super long to get into. Gotta divide them up for each OVA. We're getting into the 2000s babey!

Sanctuary OVA:

I'll be real this one is literally so good. The opening, the animation, added scenes are super cool. The op definitely has that sad 2000s vibe but that's what makes it really good and it really captures the feels of the whole arc too and the song slaps so hard. I'll be real the 3D is a little cheesy and off-putting but they tried so I'll give it to them. I wish the OVAs all had the same quality as this one, it's really such a shame this one was basically as good as it gets Hades arc-wise. Personally, I think everything was done really beautifully during this arc, and I guess it helps that this part is mostly Gold Saint-focused. I really liked watching this part honestly, idk why it has this sentimental value to me, I guess it was just the opening lol. All the scenes just hit and its sad to me ;w;

It was a great comeback tbh, though I guess it's too bad that it's only downhill from here...

Inferno + Elysium OVAs:

I'll just combine the last two OVAs together, because not much good things to add afterwards. It's more of just getting through with it unfortunately. By here, I really can't get invested since technically everyone's character arcs are basically over other than just pointlessly fighting because they need to do so.

I think it was said that the animation studio changed or at least it wasn't the same one like in the first one, and it's super noticeable with how static everyone is and it really only gets worse in the Elysium chapter with its cheesy ass google slides transitions.

Personally though, I like the new voice actors (even if it's kind of sad we don't hear the old ones) but I don't think there's really a problem they've recasted them. I just think there is a point where it's very noticeable that the voice actor is too old for a role and it really doesn't fit anymore. Though the only one I actually have a problem with not fitting at all is Takahiro Sakurai as Shiryu(plus the guy sucks now apparently, but his pitch never fit Shiryu in the first place and that's my main argument).

I thought the opening is great and goes hard. I think it was good they decided to go for at least one upbeat song since most of the tracks are all basically ballads. Also the ending song for the Elysium OVA is so amazingly good, it's such a shame they didn't actually make a real animation to go with a song like that until the last episode(I mean if you just kind of count the slideshow of the characters as animation). This one plus the Inferno one didn't get an ending either unfortunately.

Maybe this was still kind of critical lol but it doesn't mean I hated it or anything, and honestly I think it's good I've found myself invested in something again after a really long time. I think honestly this show has really influenced a lot of stuff about my interests/my own art style too so I'm glad to rekindle my love for this series again!

Overall is the ending of Saint Seiya good? Absolutely not. But did I enjoy rewatching the series again? Absolutely :)

[moonlightsdream]

Seriously what happened to kdramas we used to get a variety of genres but still had room to tell great love stories, it used to be pretty balanced maybe 60/40 in favor of dramas with romance now it has flipped, from the upcoming dramas of the year less than a third is focused on romance. I enjoy non romantic dramas, shows like stranger six flying dragons signal etc are some of the best things I've ever seen. But this feels like the korean drama industry getting swallowed up by westernization and trying to become american television (which is in shambles rn with everything getting cancelled and deleted from platforms) and I don't get it, if only those shows were actually good, sure some of them are fantastic as usual but most of them are the most derivative basic crime stories and what's with the seasons??? And they've started shortening shows, 16 was the perfect length and 20 if sometimes needed, now you can't find a 20 ep drama and we've started getting so many 12 and 8 episode shows.... Lol everywhere I turn it's a mess, american shows are all now 8 episodes never getting to develop characters or plots before getting the axe and writers are about to strike,chinese dramas have always been a complete jumble due to the political landscape which translates into crazy censorship and requirements and rules that change on a dime you're lucky if you get a drama that has a story that hasn't been cut to hell and you can actually understand what's happening, other standards like good directing and writing are just a very rare bonus and now Korean dramas in the last couple of year have turned into this. Is this a reflection of the real world which has been descending more and more into an absolute pile of shit. This industry like all of them has always been driven by greed but we always had a bit of balance with creativity and respect for audiences but now it feels like that's entirely gone and what is supposed to be our solace is an uncertain world is just turning into a mirror of it.

hello!! sorry for the late reply.. i wanted to orgnaize my thoughts first…

i really feel you anon in general, last year i haven't watched that mnay dramas and yet there were only few ones that i fully enjoyed from '22dramas, there were quite numbers of drama i enjoyed which weren't produced in '22! maybe what happened is they started making dramas with international viewers in mind! with how big korean contents have become in the last few years this was bound to happen.. all the upcoming sequels? or this weird trend of spilting dramas into parts? why not film the whole dramas and air it all at once, with so many being produced and aired between the two parts one could forgot what happened in the first part://…. and we even got some dramas that were episodic in their natura, like the case of the week law dramas :///..

long gone the many romance dramas days, esp the pure rom-com as they have to insert serial killers in 95% of them, and we rarely get melodramas… they don't produce many of them anymore and if we got ones they tend to be average mostly which is sad…. like they fall flat either because of the weak writing or lack of chemistry between the leads, i doubt they do a chemistry test between the cast to see if they have any or not :/// .. though i have to mention and say romance in a non-romance drama really hits different and could be as good and compelling as that in the romance drama!!

i might be in the minority here but i don't mind the short length format, some stories can't be stretched into 16eps, i find 12eps a very reasonble length, yet some stories could be told in less number of episodes… take last year netflix dramas they were mostly 10 or less and yet still some of them could've been told in much lesser episodes.. so the biggest issue is the weak writing followed by the directing……

if we are lucky we will get few good romance dramas this year, the bar is very low though.. in the meantime old asian dramas and movies are good alternative..

[the-firebird69]

Watch "The Beatles - Here Comes The Sun (2019 Mix)" on YouTube

So we're talking to our nephew and he says my God the prices about his own casinos or something for a room at like $450 a night and it'll probably be like that maybe not that much he says no it's probably like that he said most of them be 300 and then there's 450 and then thousands and we would have one on the end of the strip and he said well it's probably where I'll end up they were laughing because it's probably is so you have to put on it we have to put ours in even a hand sketch he has ideas he's already drawn up and he's going to submit it he knows fax it over email description and he says no it says we have a little meeting then and I'm going to see if they can contact your agent your business agent he smiles said that's a good idea. But really it needs a place to stay and we'll probably provide it

Uncle Frank Aunt Rose

It's California and it gets to be like 35° up there and in the hills it's freezing and it's freezing only at the tops of the hills and there's a couple mountains like 50 miles away so here we go again

Lol

StanSherry

And we're listening to him and yeah right away and Melissa does not want to go it's Hera and he says are you supposed to be like ultra coordinated like when a Charlie's Angels and stuff so she's laughing and says yeah really I'm kind of too big for that and he says it's going to be this like small hill I developed it sledding they have controls so she's like now and wants to do that she wants you to do it so she can beat you she knows how to sled and he says he knows how to sled. Them safety gear too helmets necklaces hard tack. In the mountains are about 4 or 5,000 ft is one that's perfect it's 6000 but it's about 70 miles away and it says I'll take all three.. so it's ridiculous and we can have helicopter helicopters in small Jets to take people up there buses and special buses to hold a lot of gear and probably told the gear behind and the trailer so you don't have to mess around with it this is going to be awesome they do that at casinos okay in Las Vegas you can go skiing it's about a hundred miles away here would be about 50 miles 60 miles and 70 miles camping hiking dirt biking four wheeling boating all sorts of crazy stuff and races and stuff to bet on it's going to be huge race thing that you've been on we are putting in buildings right now everybody keep in mind this is going forwards

:: we have put in 20 since this morning about 10 of them are already structurally retrofitted we're putting in 15 more I think 35 out of 80 of the huge ones really they'll fit probably total 100 so people are starting to call and been calling and saying is it real I want to reserve a lot and it is a lease for certain terms and we would build the building and usually to what you guys would want and they're amazed so we are accepting proposals for different casinos and we're going to start off with a group of 10 that would be in the middle on either end there be four five on the other end and we're starting to hear from them and we'll probably contact business agents we know who serious about it the two big fellows were really short actually and there's a few others we're going to get going on it and Stan wants to propose his at one of the ends and it's a smaller casino but to people in Vegas it's a medium sized one it has like 4000 beds that's what it look like Las Vegas on the outside and a massive massive area on the inside and a city in the distance and casinos on the hills and one of them is going to be Olympus he says if we approve him and he knows why I be hard and no he can't do just mine it's not Valhalla but thank you and no we're not going to do an Asgard and it did not turn into a movie thanks though. The clothes are very aggressive in the Ukraine and they're becoming very aggressive in California a lot of people are trying to sign up for the casino Mac is going to open a similar place but manufacturing and it's going to protect it he gets it now

Thor Freya

This song is a reminder about what JC is talking about and or tell me if depending and it's horrible terrifying and we don't like it but it's a good way to remember it

Hera Zues

Tons of songs from The Beatles sound like what we're talking about that's us

Mac daddy he's saying and saying and he is this rich guy Penny Lane is in his heart and it's about our friend here my grand nephew it's not fair and it's not true and he's kind of a wacko and the head wacko he doesn't get it he's sacrificing for his people and he's just saying he's not the whole time because he's an idiot

It's true he's not really keeping it straight and doesn't think he has to like a lot of people

Zues Hera

I want him out and Tommy F they're both massive massive killers of our own people

Mac

Olympus

[bondsmagii]

about the people feeling bad about aging: i think it has nothing to do with how old you actually are and it's 100% people's (especially americans) obsession with youth. most of my friends started feeling old at 14 or 15. i literally remember being freshly 15 and wanting to make a pillow fort and feeling so embarassed because i thought i was supposed to act like an adult and it was cringy to like childish stuff. i felt bad because i hadn't achieved anything yet. at 15. that's not normal and it wouldn't be happening if it wasn't for the weird attitude people online have about aging. you're supposed to somehow be 18, look 25, and have the achievements of a 40 year old. you're not allowed to be a kid and you're not allowed to age. and the age where you become "old" is becoming younger and younger. i used to be baffled at people saying shit like "wow, she looks good for 30" because unless you're doing crack clearly you won't look old at 30, but now it's become "you look good for being 25". it's insane. if you have friends who are older than you they tell you you're being groomed and if you date someone 2 years younger than you they call you a pedophile. the mindset around aging is so weird. anyways i turned 20 this year and after feeling like shit on every birthday since i was 14 i think i finally feel normal lol. like i'm literally just becoming sexier and more powerful as i get older so what am i worried about. using social media less and going outside more helped too. no sane person irl is calling 16, 25, 30 year olds old.

yeah, this is a really good point. I remember writing in my journal panicking about how me and my friends were "getting old"... when I was 16. like I was literally losing my mind because it was January and I was filling in my friends' birthdays on my new calendar and I wrote Caoimhe (17) for one of my best friends and I was freaking out because oh my god she's going to be 17, that's so old, right? hell, if this was the beginning of January I would have been 15 and worrying about this, so like. wack.

I think I've been unlearning this for a while, but it really sunk in when I started going to a weekly pub quiz with a group of friends ranging from their 20s to their 70s. chatting to a friend between quiz rounds who was telling me first-hand stories of WWII; chatting to another friend about her watching the news during the Cuban missile crisis and freaking out worrying about what it might mean; chatting to another friend about the fall of the Berlin wall... it really made me realise that I'm fucking baby. like straight-up. there's so much history out there and I'm not yet 30. that is unfathomably young, and even my friends in their 70s could theoretically live another 30 years. it's laughable to feel old at 16, or 26, or whatever. you're right -- nowhere in real life is acting like that's old. I think if people are genuinely worried about being "too old" when they're not yet out of high school or barely out of college or whatever, it might be beneficial to log off for a while. the internet really distorts what's normal, making your 30s seem old and acting like any friend younger than you is inherently being abused by you or some shit.

at first I used to bristle a bit when my elderly friends would make side points like "you're young, you don't know what I mean yet", but I get it now. this is a woman who's 77 years old, and at the time I was like. mid-twenties. when I was being born, she was in her 50s. she was already a grandmother. I am literally a child to her. the idea that I could call myself old at that age is absolutely laughable, and I do think that people could benefit from a bit of perspective. go and chat to somebody in their 60s or 70s. they'll enjoy the company, have incredible stories to tell, and they'll make you realise that the fun and the learning and the experiencing things does not stop once you hit your mid-twenties.

[gossip-girl-of-middleearth]

Hello! I hope this doesn’t make you uncomfy but I was wondering if I could get a bit of advice? From your recent posts, you said you left your home from toxicity and just bad things in general.

I’m in a similar situation, but my dad will be taking me away from my mom. And I just know it’ll be a shit show. And I’m absolutely terrified when we tell her and what the backlash will be afterwards towards my brothers and me and dad in general

How did you do it? How did you take the leap? Do you possibly have any advice on how to deal ?

Hello, friend!! ☀️

Thank you so much for reaching out, it means a lot that you value my advice <3

Hmm, okay from what I can tell of your situation, that is indeed a tricky one, but nothing can’t be overcome!

It’s important to remember, though, I was 19 when I left (now 20), so the way I handled things is going to be a lot different than how a minor can handle things (legally at least, feel free to replicate my insane stunts lmao)

Advice below the cut! (family violence trigger warning, I suppose?)

My entire family was and is extremely volatile, and I don’t speak to any of them anymore except for my older brother, but I’ll be cutting him off in 3 weeks too when I move.

Fortunately, my dad and brother were both kicked out of the house years ago due to violence, which left me with my mother, who’s quite insidious herself (just watch any Conjuring movie and that’ll give a good idea of what it was like living in that house lol)

I get the same feeling watching this scene as when I was around her in that house. Granted she didn’t try to change my gender, but the hatred for my father getting taken out on me is pretty accurate lol, paired with the immediate “motherly love” afterwards (she never hit me though, pleased to say — she wasn’t physically violent, just emotionally, financially, mentally and verbally. She did try to run my dad over once though, so, there’s that too)

Yikes…yeahh the same eerie feeling for sure, still makes all my hairs stand upright in memory.

(For further context this clip reminds me of my father and this one of my brother)

In the clip about my father, he definitely reminds me of Frank Gallagher, except he despises my mother instead of revering her. He’s a workaholic instead of a drug addict, too. But the mannerisms are the same. I always handled him in the way Fiona does.

Regarding my brother, I think everything about our family hit him the hardest, despite being the oldest. He developed a very violent streak, and has very poor impulse control. I love him dearly but he’s a snake in the grass, and has thrown me under the bus multiple times to get ahead in life. I mostly just pity him, since I know what our life was like growing up. But still, I can’t defend him forever, especially not at the cost of myself. Literally yesterday I woke up to a text from him asking me to come pick him up because he got arrested for starting a fight at a bar and smashing their windows.

When things started getting pretty bad with my mother earlier this year, I started to realise in my heart that there was no way I could go forth in life with her in it. I focused on the future relationships I would have one day when far away from this town — romantic partner, children, friends etc

I sort of realised one day I’d care about them a lot more than I care about my mother, because those future people would care about me. That in turn got me realising that I do deserve love, despite how my mother made me feel, and that I don’t want her to deprive another second of that in my life.

Something very unique that triggered this too was going to go visit an old family psychic, who’s basically just the Gandalf to my Frodo (ily, Chris <3). He very accurately predicted my birth years ago after my mother was told she was infertile — he got the date, year and time right three years in advance, and even knew ahead of time what my personality would be like, which he was spot-on about.

Well, I went and visited him a few months ago because I was lost with my direction, and he ended up pausing and had a sudden feeling, which led to him telling me that he’d just found out I would be having twin boys one day.

Normally I don’t buy into that stuff, but this Gandalf dude…well I knew he was right.

Knowing I’d have sons of my own one day took me from a scared daughter mindset and into a maternal mother bear in an instant, and I knew I didn’t want any children of mine around my mother or the rest of my family, for their safety alone, which made me realise, “Well, if I wouldn’t allow my own children near them, why do I allow myself?”

I started grey-rocking her in the lead-up to me leaving, which of course frustrated her (she’s a malignant narcissist), but it was a necessary step to start emotionally detaching myself from her.

It all bottled over one night after a pretty distressing argument (I had locked myself in my room to avoid it, but she was still at my door carrying on).

My cat, who’s been my best friend for years, was sitting on the floor next to me, and sort of looked up and I swear he spoke with his eyes, saying, “You know we can’t keep doing this, right? You know this abuse has an expiry date?”

I agreed with my cat and knew right then and there that I’d be leaving that night after my mother fell asleep.

Well, when she was finally done (with threats that there’d be more in stock in the morning, mind you) I went to bed early and set my alarm to 3am (was a little inside joke with myself, since that’s biblically the “witching devil hour”)

I started quietly packing my quilt and cat up (I’d already been secretly packing the boot of my car up with all sentimental and important items weeks in advance, except she caught on and took all my baby albums and more to her boyfriend’s house, so I don’t have any baby photos or information on me when I was a baby anymore, like first words, size and just general things I’d have liked to compare to my own kids one day, rip)

Once that was all in my car, I quietly said goodbye to the old family dog and cat (they weren’t mine to take, not that I could’ve anyways, since it was troubling enough taking Buddy, who’s actually my pet and not the family one). That was pretty heartbreaking, as I knew that’d be the last time I’d see them (I grew up with them and was the only one who took care of them — mother neglects kids and pets alike lmao).

Once that was over, I looked around my house with my hand on the front door and was very melancholy, but knew Buddy was right: it had all reached its expiry date.

I left very quietly and drove to McDonalds for a coffee, as I had a long drive ahead (I had organised to be a nanny in this rich family’s house far away in the city — two hours drive). Luckily they were away on their country farm 4 hours away, so I had time to sneak Buddy in.

The nanny thing recently backfired horribly because they discovered Buddy, which led to more AM escapes with my car, but I’m staying with my older brother and his gf for 3 more weeks only. Something I’ve been working towards for months now is moving to a wilderness island to live in my country’s equivalent of Bag End — a beautiful country cottage, amazing job and fantastic study opportunities.

Best feature yet: it’s 60 hours away from my hometown by car, and then you’d have to take a boat for 10 more hours!! They shall never find me hahaha

One of my friends has also told me recently that my mother has started spreading horrible, defamatory rumours about me around town, but I don’t care anymore because I’m almost out.

So, although I can’t offer any practical advice (idk if you’re a minor or not, but regardless it’s great your dad is helping you!) this is the best advice I can offer:

Find a dream and hold onto it, one that doesn’t involve your immediate family. For me it’s moving to that island and enjoying all the fresh air. It’ll push you forwards and remind you of what you’re fighting for when at your lowest.

Remind yourself there will be other people in your life, whether a spouse, friends, children or even a dog! (I’m getting a golden retriever next year 🐾) And then remember that you deserve all of them and the unconditional love they offer you.

Remember that if you don’t want your mother/family screwing those people over by proxy of her/their relationship to you, then there’s no way in hell you alone should put up with it either, as I guarantee those future people only want good things for you ☀️

There is a good life after abuse, I’ve seen it, and I know you can achieve it, too!

Be prepared for tons of backlash and bullshit — it’s inescapable when dealing with people like this, but I recommend educating yourself on narcissistic parents and tactics to deal with them.

Finding a good therapist who deals in PTSD regarding childhood abuse is important, too. I found an amazing one in the town I’m moving to, who had nearly the same upbringing as me!

So while I’m still struggling with a lot of fear (scared my mother will find where I’m working and living one day) and guilt (I feel horrible about leaving the family dog and cat behind, especially when they need veterinary help, only to then go and get myself another puppy) I understand I’ve done the best I can in a very abnormal situation, and that I can only do better from here.

Also, this song has been a saving grace when going all angsty over wanting to leave your current situation:

It’s from my favourite Broadway Musical, “Newsies”, and lemme tell you — discovering this as a 17-year-old when I was just starting to realise the severity of my situation was pure divinity.

Jeremy Jordan, my beloved Broadway Bard <3

When I finally get my cottage, I’m getting a wooden plaque with the name “Santa Fe” engraved on it, and am hanging it on my front door.

I wish you much luck and love, my little anonymous friend! And please know my inbox is open any time you need anything — vent, advice, a laugh or something else, ANYTHING, it feels good to know my past can maybe help someone else’s present ☀️

Please update me, too! I’m following your story along ardently now! (Also, be sure to take your sentimental items and store them somewhere safe away from your mother — ie baby albums, birth certificates, other paraphernalia/memorabilia etc).

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must hit the road. DESTINY AWAITS!

[padawanlost]

You know people getting married quickly isn’t all that abnormal...Anakin & Padme get married after a near death situation and before a start of another war (Clone Wars). It’s not like our parents, grandparents and so forth didn’t get married prior or after a war or considering what was expected during that time period. Those complaining might find it a abnormal find it weird cause of the times we live in now (of course there could be another reasons).

I’m not sure if you’re referring to anything specific but when it comes Anakin and Padmé’s wedding, it’s not only an age issue. It’s also about how and why they got married.

Yes, it might not be as popular as it used to but not that far in the past it was normal for people to get married in their early 20s. to be fair, I know quite a few people who got married recently in their early 20s. so, you know, age itself is not the issue.

The bigger issue is how and why they got married. The young adults marrying these days (arguably, even back in the day) don’t do it romeo and Juliet style. There’s a level of maturity in the choice of getting married I’m not sure either Anakin or Padmé possessed. That’s the real issue. In a way, it’s kind of like Romeo and Julie in the way when you’re young their story sounds romantic but as you grow older you begin to realize how unnecessary it all us. it goes from romance to clusterfuck real fast lol

Look, I love Anidala. I ship it hard. but I once thought as romantic in my teens now I find hasty and immature. If Anakin and Padmé weren’t were to admit their relationship and deal with the consequences of their choices, they certainly weren’t ready to get married and have kids.

Sure, we can argue that people get marry hastily at young ages all the time, specially in times of great distress but I think most of us can agree that just because something happens doesn’t mean it’s the ideal scenario. Yes, 60 years ago it’s normal for young people get married but that doesn’t necessary mean those relationship were happy and healthy. Also, it’s important to remember that back then divorce was still taboo and single people (especially women) were society’s punch bag.

Now, to be fair, most criticism Anakin and Padmé face comes from a much simpler place: they don’t like the prequels, they don’t like Anakin, Padmé or the idea of them together. Complaints about their marriage can be put on a long, long list of PT-related prequel.

Whether we like it or not, George wasn’t going for a realistic romance. He was going form a romeo and Juliet type of kind and once we accept that Anakin and Padmé’s relationship start makes much more sense.

“I wanted to write a love story in a style that was extremely old-fashioned, and frankly I didn’t know if I was going to pull it off. In many ways this was much more like a movie that from the 1930s than any of the others had been, with a slightly over-the-top, poetic style-and they just don’t do that in movies anymore. I was very happy with the way it turned out in the script and in the performances, but I knew people might not buy it.”  George Lucas

What I’m trying to say is that no matter how much I love Anidala and their ultra-romantic relationship, I wouldn’t compare their most dramatic moments to any real life, ‘mundane’ counterpart. Not because I don’t enjoy my overdramatic love birds, but because their romance wasn’t supposed to be taken as realistic portrayal of any normal relationship.

[stemgaysupreme]

On Carrying Capacity - A Critical Role Math Problem

I’ve been getting kind of annoyed (read: extremely anxious about the m9′s survival) every time Matt doesn’t let a polymorphed giant eagle or giant owl carry three party members (one of which is Veth) without their speed being halved, so I wanted to do some digging on the rules for carrying capacity and see if Veth’s weight was actually pushing the party over the max the creature could carry at full speed. After I did all of this I really felt the need to share it so... Here you go...?

I’ll go into specifics of things under the cut but for those who just want to know the answer, technically a giant eagle’s max carrying capacity is 480lbs and a giant owl’s is 390 lbs. Based on some math and some guessing of some character weights, the party, excluding the polymorphed Caleb and Jester, can be split with Yasha and Fjord on one bird and Caduceus, Beau, and Veth on the other and have their total weights be 386lbs and 380lbs respectively. 

Even if they were playing with the variant encumbrance rules (explained under the cut) their speeds would only drop by 20 feet rather that be halved, so the eagle would still be going 60 feet/round and the owl would be going 40 feet/round rather than 40 and 30. Heck, if they’re eagles, as long as Veth is on the bird with three people, they would both be able to do 60 feet/round. But I SERIOUSLY doubt they’re using encumbrance because, if they were, heavily encumbered creatures (like the birds would likely be when Matt halves their speed) would have disadvantage on all Dex, Str, and Con ability checks, attack rolls, and saving throws. So, really, if they aren’t playing with encumbrance, either they should be half speed when only carrying two people, or they should still be at full speed when carrying three people.

TL;DR: Matt, please, either let them fly faster, or tell me what the rules you’re using are.

I broke this up into sections so that if you already know the rules of carrying weight, or don’t care how I got character weights, you don’t have to read that bit.

Carrying Weight Rules

Ok, so, first things first, how much are these birds supposed to be able to carry? Well, the player’s handbook says a medium creature’s max carrying weight is 15 times their strength score, and twice that amount for a large creature (which is what the birds are) so we get

Giant Eagle (STR: 16) : 16 x 15 x 2 = 480lbs

Giant Owl (STR: 13) :  13 x 15 x 2 = 390lbs

If they are using the encumbrance variant rule, they either become “heavily encumbered” at 10 times their strength score, or 20 times, depending on whether you interpret the rules to say that this value is doubled for large creatures or not. This doesn’t really matter for us because, either way, even just two party members usually means they would be considered heavily encumbered, meaning their speed would decrease by 20 feet, and they  would have disadvantage on all Dex, Str, and Con ability checks, attack rolls, and saving throws. 

Important to note: I couldn’t find any rule that had a creature’s speed cut in half due to carrying weight, but if someone knows of one, let me know, as if it exists, it’s likely what Matt is using, though I suspect he is just making it up (WHICH IS 1000000% VALID)

Character Weights

Some character weights were much easier to find than others, and honestly, all but one is an estimation, but in general, I followed the same process. 

1. How tall are they? - While some characters have their exact heights, others are guesses, and a few are basically me saying “I swear I remember so-and-so saying they were this tall in-game”

The exact heights (from Crit Role Stats) are: 

- Yasha at 5′11″

- Veth at 3′6″

The “I swear  I remember so-and-so saying they were this tall in-game” ones are:

- Caduceus at 7′0″ (the fandom wiki backs me up on this one)

- Beau at 5′5″ (It’s either this or 5′4″ I think, but I went with this)

The only true guess:

- Fjord at 6′0″ (Fjord thinks he’s not very big but Ashley insisted on Talks once that Yasha was shorter than Fjord so this is the best compromise I had)

I didn’t bother with doing Caleb or Jester because, well, they’re the owls usually.

Shoutout to Crit Role Stats for existing and having like, half the character’s heights. If a height or weight seems off, I’m sorry, I did what I could to get a good guess. If there is a CONFIRMED height/weight that I don’t have here, let me know! But if you think Jester is an inch taller or shorter than what I have, I don’t know what to tell you other than “sorry???”

2. What is their race’s average weight for their height? - This is the most math intensive part of all this, but it’s not too bad. Each race has a base height, base weight, height modifier, and weight modifier. The base height and weight are just numbers, so for humans their base height is 4′8″ and their base weight is 110lbs. The modifiers are determined by rolling dice associated with the race, so for humans their height modifier is 2d10 and their weight modifier is 2d4. Your final height would be the base height plus the number you rolled for your height modifier in inches. Then, your final weight would be the base weight plus your height modifier times your weight modifier. By knowing the base heights of each character’s race, and having their height, we can find their height modifier, and use that to determine their maximum and minimum weights, and use those to get their average weight. This is a lot of information, so I made a chart for it

A note on Halflings: Turns out, Halflings are one of the races (others being Gnomes, Goblins, and Kobolds) that don’t multiply their height modifier by anything when applying it to their weight.

3. Adjusting for body type - Based on what we know about these characters, some of the average weights just don’t feel right, so I ended up changing some of them.

- Veth: I left hers as is because Halflings always have a weight modifier of one.

- Yasha: I left hers alone as well because it feels pretty good for a buff barbarian. She’s all muscle.

- Beau: I took her weight down because, as a 5′5″/5′6″ ish woman, I really don’t think someone built for speed and agility is going to be 155 pounds. I guessed roughly 130lbs, though it could be closer to 140lbs, I have never been the owner of a six pack, so I don’t entirely know how much weight that much muscle adds.

- Caduceus: Once again I’m going to mention that the fandom wiki backs me up here by saying that Caduceus is “not necessarily healthily thin” so I took him down to 210lbs. I probably could’ve gone down even a bit more but opted to play it safe to balance out any issues with Beau’s weight.

- Fjord: He’s a notoriously small dude, no way he’s 238 pounds, and given how large his possible weight range is, and his less than impressive strength score, I bumped him down to 195 which seems fair for a guy that’s 6 feet tall, but when you compare it to Yasha, either hers is too high, or his is, but since all of my adjustments are decreases from the average, I’m hesitant to lower either any more.

4. Final Weights - After all that,  we’ve got the party sitting at the following weight approximations:

Yasha - 185lbs

Beau - 130lbs

Caduceus - 210lbs

Fjord - 195lbs

Veth - 46lbs

Putting It All Together

As it turns out, based on these weights, Fjord and Yasha combine to be just six pounds lighter than Veth, Cad, and Beau combined at 380lbs versus 386lbs. In fact, this combination is the only way both groups stay under the girant owl’s maximum carrying capacity of 390lbs. So effectively what this means is if Caduceus has ever been on a giant owl with Fjord or Yasha, the owl shouldn’t have been able to move. That is important. Because if Caduceus has ever been on an owl with Fjord or Yasha, it means that the determining factor of whether or not a giant bird can fly is not the total weight it is carrying, rather it is the number of people it is carrying.

Personally, the best part of this whole thing is knowing that they combination they used at the start of c2e124 was one of only a few that wouldn’t allow both eagles to move at full speed. 

Also, when it comes to encumbrance rules, all of the combinations still only reduce speed by 20 feet per round, so even with those rules they would be going faster than Matt is allowing. 

And One More Thing

I did this because I found it interesting, not because the way Matt is doing things is “wrong” or something. He gets to decide. End of story. But in the case that Matt doesn’t know (lol Matt Mercer not knowing every DnD rule ever? wild) what the rules “technically” are, then I’d love it if he found out and changed how he ran things. 

Basically I’m saying don’t start fandom discourse with my fun DnD math problem. I did it for me and anyone else that cares, and Matt can do what he wants. For all I know I’ve gotten a character weight wrong and it completely ruins the entire thing.