#and there is nothing pre-T that i want to go back to tbh
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Hi, Im the anon who asked about you using T. I just want to know which emotional and physical changes you went through and when they started. Also, I read often that going on T prevented people from crying as easily as before, one even said that he hasnt cried in 2 years(!), which honestly for me, who is quite an easy crier, and who doesnt believe that men who cry/show emotion are not masculine enough/unamanly, its quite horrifying to hear. So what is your experience with showing emotions/crying before and after T? And how has your partner shown their support? Or have you met them after being an extended amount of time on T?
Physical changes have been pretty much what one would expect I think: lower voice, more and thicker facial/body hair (maybe less than expected?), different body odor, rougher/oilier skin, fat redistribution, more vascularity, bottom growth, more muscle, male hairline, have just starting to treat male pattern hair loss... I'm probably missing some but those are what come to mind. I didn't track them as they happened, unfortunately, but I think they generally happened over the first year/couple years. I know that body fat redistribution wasn't something I noticed until at least a year in, and it probably continued to happen for a while. I lost fat off my face faster though, I think. Voice drop happened slowly over several months.
Emotional changes are harder to isolate since I was already dealing with a lot of stuff when I started T and that might have overshadowed any emotional changes. T and the changes made me less depressed, so I just generally felt better? I don't really remember anything else sticking out - I certainly didn't feel angrier or less emotional.
I can cry pretty easily, and I've cried easier since starting T! But again, kinda hard to isolate from everything else that has happened. The other thing is like. Time and getting older has played a role; I've learned more about my emotions and experienced things that cause new/stronger emotions, and that also makes it easier for me to be emotional. So it's definitely not just T - and even if you were to feel weaker emotions on T, I don't think that's how it always has to be. There are ways to get more in touch with your own emotions and things that will happen in your life that can do the same.
And lol I am single! And yeah, previous partners haven't really needed to be involved, so I don't have personal experience with that.
#ask me#this feels like an incredibly generic answer 😅#if you've got more questions or want me to go into something in more detail please say so!#but i really mean it when i say that T has generally been a very smooth thing for me#and there is nothing pre-T that i want to go back to tbh#or well. i think i get body acne more easily and the hair loss is annoying but that is such a minor treatable thing in comparison so#essentially nothing pre-T that I miss#throughalleternity
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Why am i ready for stalker aemond that has slow burn and is super angsty? like someone who isnt afraid of his scar in preschool then moves away but he found her in either social media or a sports meet and started stalking from then on and then he goes to the same college and remembers her schedule, which dorm shes in and trying to get in her room at night or is in the dorm across from her and ugh i could start a fic tbh
If you do start a Fic, 100% tag me in that sh*t! I would LOVE to read it, but because you sent it to me imma give it a go for you cause it sounds delicious! I hope it is everything you want it to be!
Yandere!Aemond. Major Stalking! You’ve Been Warned!
DD:DNE
Aemond considered Y/n to be a miracle from the day he met her.
It was the first day of Pre-School and he wanted to be anywhere but there, surrounded by other students. He wanted to be at home with his mother, or even his big brother, anyone just to get away from the staring children.
Aemond had learned almost as soon as his cousin had sliced his face open that while adults would stare, they would at least be discreet about it, children were not. Aemond, while being a child, didn’t consider himself one, and it was something most adults found amusing as he would much rather spend time with his mother or the adults in his family than with his siblings or cousins. He would rather read than play with toys, rather watch movies his mother liked than ones his siblings enjoyed, it’s just the way Aemond had always been…until her.
All of the children stared at him from the moment he walked in and said “goodbye” to his mother. The staff tried to direct the children away, told them it was rude to stare, but they weren’t always paying attention and trying to get a bunch of 4 year olds attention when they’re locked onto something is…difficult at best. Around lunch time the staff had left all but one in the room to prepare food for the kids and suddenly Aemond found a boy much larger than him to be holding his eyepatch in his hand, the children around him laughing and teasing immediately. The teacher was on the other side of the room and oblivious as Aemond tried to grab his eyepatch back, the other boy shoving him to the ground before he was suddenly laying right beside Aemond holding his crotch and wailing in pain. A blonde girl that Aemond could only describe as beautiful was standing above him with an angry look on her face.
‘What did he ever do to you?! Huh?! Leave Him Alone!’ She snatched the eyepatch from the portly child’s hand and moved to hand it back to Aemond who strapped it back on immediately. ‘Are you okay?’ Aemond nodded quickly, opening his mouth to speak but finding no words that would come out. ‘I’m Y/n, you’re Aemond, right?’ He nodded again, mouth hanging open dumbly and looking like an idiot he is sure. ‘I’m sorry he did that, No one should be mean like that for something you can’t help and you don’t have to tell no one nothing…I’m sorry, you want to be alone.’ She turned to walk away when he finally got his voice box to work…sadly it had been muted so long that the sound he finally made was a bit too loud.
‘NO!’ He exclaimed and she jumped, turning back to him instantly. ‘I’m sorry…I mean, no, I don’t want to be alone…it’s nice to meet you Y/n…do you want to sit with me for lunch?’ She smiled, a red tint to her cheeks and Aemond decided he absolutely adored her pretty smile.
‘Yeah…that sounds fun.’ She grabbed ahold of his hand and pulled him over to a table, handing him a place mat and some crayons to decorate it with. Coloring was never something Aemond had really enjoyed, Art wasn’t his thing, but if Y/n enjoyed it then so did he.
Aemond and Y/n spent the rest of the day together before pick-up and as soon as he said “good-bye”, leaving with his mothers driver and climbed into the car beside his mom, he was talking about her. Alicent was thrilled that her son had made a friend his own age, while it’s entertaining to see her 4 year old boy so grown-up and mature, she didn’t want him to miss out on being a child just because he didn’t have any friends.
At the end of the week, after learning that Aemond and Y/n’s friendship wasn’t going anywhere, Alicent stood outside to pick her son up rather than wait in the car for their driver to get him. She watched her son run outside, hand in hand with a girl a bit shorter than him and they looked truly adorable. ‘Mom!’ Her son exclaimed, excited to see her waiting for him herself and deciding she should do this more often to see that smile so rare on her baby’s face.
‘Hello, my sweet Little Dragon! How was your day?’ She asked, watching the girl run to a women a few feet away and take her hand.
‘It was so good! Y/n and I made pictures of our families for the wall-wait! You need to meet her! Y/n!’ Aemond exclaimed, the girl stopping and her mother looking back as well, slightly irritated. ‘Mom, this is Y/n, she’s my best friend!’ He grinned and so did Y/n who hugged him at that deceleration.
‘Well, if she’s your best friend then you must have her over for a play date. Would that be alright?’ She asked the girls mom.
‘Oh, yes, of course. Anytime.’ She spoke, writing down her number on a piece of paper. ‘I’m Marie, it’s nice to meet you, Y/n talks about your boy all the time.’
‘Mom!’ The girl whined, the mothers sharing a side smile at their kids evident first crush on each other.
‘It’s lovely to meet you, I’m Alicent. How about tomorrow? She can come by and spend the day with us, I’ll drop her at home after dinner?’ Her mom looked surprised.
‘That’s perfect actually, I have work all day. Text me your address and what time to drop her off, she will love spending the day with Aemond rather than the neighbor. I’m sorry to say I’m in a rush to get back to work, it was nice meeting you Alicent, and you too Aemond. Come on Y/n, let go.’
‘Bye Aemond!’ Y/n waved, her mother dragging her off. She didn’t strike Alicent as rude, just in a bit of a hurry. You could clearly see the difference in their status in life, if not just from the fact that Y/n’s mother was wearing a waitress uniform and Alicent was wearing a Versace dress and Gucci shoes. She finds herself wondering how the women pays for the fancy daycare at all.
Alicent had married rich, Viserys happy to give her anything she wants as long as she doesn’t bother him at work, and he’s always at work. When he’s not however he is spending time with his daughter from his first marriage, Rhaenyra. Rhaenyra is 24 now, Viserys being significantly older than Alicent but she didn’t mind, he was a good, gentle man and that was hard to come by now a days. She had 2 sons, Jace who was 5 and Luke who was 3 (a child she detested for being the one who had sliced her baby’s face open 6 months before as he ran around the mansion with an old dagger from Viserys’ office and didn’t pay attention to her son sitting on the ground), though Rhaenyra was also pregnant with another child, none of which are her husbands clearly but that’s not her business… Alicent has 3 children of her own, Aegon who was 7, Helaena who was 5 and Aemond who had just turned 4, though she also suspected she was carrying a child that she hoped was a girl if not just to keep another boy from the chaos and bullying that goes on between the siblings and cousins.
‘Y/n is gonna spend the whole day with me?!’ Aemond suddenly exclaimed, knocking his mother from her thoughts.
‘Yes, she is. You’ll need to plan what you two want to do for the day and I’ll make sure Aegon doesn’t disturb you.’
‘Jace and Luke either?’ He asked…begged is more like.
‘Jace and Luke either, I’ll make sure they have something to do when they come tomorrow.’ The family always came to the house on the weekends as Viserys took that time for his family…part of it anyway.
‘Yay! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!’ Alicent was thrilled to see her son so happy…she had no idea it would be so incredibly short lived.
Y/n had begun spending the day with Aemond every day, coming to their house in their car after school, her mother coming to get her after work to take her home looking more tired than the night before. Alicent had tried to help the poor women. It turns out her husband had cheated on her while she was pregnant and gotten another women pregnant, divorcing her for his mistress and son. He’s the one who paid for the fancy preschool while her mother worked 3 jobs to keep everything afloat in their one bedroom apartment, since he paid for such a nice school he only paid 200 in child support leaving Marie with everything else and all the debt he had left behind in her name.
Alicent was happy to watch Y/n whenever she needed, it made her son happy and that’s all she wanted in the world. She had been so scared for him before he met Y/n that he would end up going down a dark path, the bullying at home and at school having been hard for him as well as his father clearly loving the child who had butchered him more than his own son.
That all came to a grinding halt however when Y/n’s mom was evicted from her apartment leaving them homeless, forcing them to move in with Marie’s ex-mother in-law who lived in New York. Aemond had tried to promise to visit every weekend before Alicent was forced to explain just how far away New York was from California, to say the children were upset was a huge understatement. The teary good-bye nearly broke the mothers hearts as they swore to write to each other every day, and they did, they both learned to write faster than any of the kids their age just to write to each other and it lasted about a year. Y/n’s grandmother had found out she was writing to a boy in California and cut it off, threatening to take Y/n away from her mother if her mother didn’t stop the interaction. Marie wrote Alicent and explained what had happened leaving her to break her baby’s heart all over again.
Aemond became cold after that. He had no more friends, detested his cousins, tolerated his brothers and only loved Helaena though she was with friends everyday of her life. He took his schooling very seriously, taking several extra curricular’s on the side to take up his time which consisted of Jiu-Jitsu, Tae Kwon Do, and oddly enough, sword fighting which Alicent didn’t support right away until he promised to start with fencing. It turned out that he was really good at it and his father hired a trainer, Criston Cole, to teach him sword fighting, paying to transform a room in the mansion into a training room.
Once Aemond got to middle school, no one was bullying him anymore after breaking 3 kids noses and 2 of their arms. When he turned 14 and moved up to high school he had finally broken down and created an Instagram account. Aemond hated social media, he found it annoying and pointless, but he quickly found a use for it once he looked up Y/n and found her account. It wasn’t private, making it easy to look through all of her pictures, finding out that she still lived in New York with just her Grandmother now as her mother had passed away in a hit and run with a drunk driver when she was 9. She had many pictures with her and another girl who seemed to be her best and only friend and nowhere could Aemond find anything about a boyfriend which gave him an instant sense of relief. He had spent the last almost 10 years obsessing over her, though he kept it to himself. He had sent her a letter a few years before, hoping that maybe now that they had grown a bit she would be able to write him back but it was returned unopened with a note that told him to never send anything again or her grandmother would file a restraining order.
For the next 2 years he was as content as he could be watching her life through social media, until their junior year that is when he decided to pay a man to hack into her computer, actually watching what he did and figuring out how to go about doing it himself. He read all of her emails from then on, finding out what colleges she was applying to and applying himself, knowing he would obviously get in with his incredible grades and extra curricular’s. Her grandmother was forcing her to go to college, wanting her to be a physical therapist despite the fact that she wanted to be an artist. Aemond had found she had a separate, secret Instagram account that her grandmother didn’t know about that held all of her paintings and sketches, and she was honestly incredible.
Aemond had decided that when she was his she would drop out of college and move in with him, she would have her own little art studio to do whatever she wanted in. He would buy her anything she wanted, give her everything in the world if she only asked for it, Y/n Y/L/n was going to be his wife…whether she knew it yet or not.
At 18, Aemond moved out to New York for the year, deciding not to go to college but convincing his father to open a branch of his publishing business out there and let him set everything up for him. It wouldn’t be hard, honestly Aemond would pay others to do everything and just oversee the company while he watched over his Princess. He had already been stalking her online for over 4 years and in her own computer for 2, this was hardly a step up.
Alicent knew of course, she knew that her son had become more than a little obsessed with his childhood friend and she knew that that’s why her boy was going to New York, she had been the one to talk her husband into letting him go. She wanted him to be happy, by any means necessary after all this time of misery and if he needed Y/n to make that happen then she was more than happy to welcome the sweet girl into the family. Even if she knew what her son was doing was wrong, she couldn’t change his mind, and she didn’t want to. Alicent loved Y/n and she knew that if there was one person in the world that her son would never hurt, it was her.
He watched from across the Quad as she arrived at the school, unpacking her things from the car and moving it all into her dorm room, a room which Aemond had made sure was a single for only her, he also made sure he had acquired a key for himself. He felt horrible that he couldn’t help her move things, especially the heavy things, but he knew there was no way she wouldn’t recognize him, and she clearly remembered him. She had several old pictures uploaded to her Instagram of the two of them together, one of them at a Carnival with their faces painted (which she had made him do, even forcing the painter to paint over the eyepatch since it would wash off), one of them carving pumpkins on Halloween, and Aemond’s personal favorite, a picture of the two of them snuggled up in his bed as she had slept over the night before, she was snuggled into his chest with his arms around her and his face in her hair which covered the scar completely. He knew she had plenty of pictures of the two of them without his eye patch on but she never put them online and he loved her for that, even if she didn’t know it yet. Next to his mother, she was the only person who really understood how sensitive he was about his scar and she never made him feel less than because of it, he knew she would never betray him, not even having shown her mother the pictures without the eyepatch.
He followed her to all of her classes, often watching them through the security cameras he had hacked into (becoming quite good at it) to see her during class, he had always loved her look of concentration as her eyes narrowed and she looked like she was scowling at you, she was adorable. He had placed several cameras in her room as well, watching her whenever he could, all she really did was school work and he realized how overwhelmed she was by college life, school was never her environment, it was too stressful for her and her free spirited mind and he knew it. He also knew that her Grandmother had threatened to kick her out onto the streets if she didn’t go to college for what she told her to, he had plans for that women, she will get what she deserves.
On several occasions he was witness to moments that he knew should be private, whether that be her stressed out crying or more…intimate moments. He couldn’t help but watch as her fingers touched her pretty little pussy, rubbing her clit and listening to the sweet sounds she made trying to be quiet, he couldn’t help but wrap his fingers around his length and edge himself right along with her, imagining those fingers in her cunt were his cock, desperate to feel her soft, warm pussy squeezing him as tight as it could as he made her cum again and again until she couldn’t take it anymore. He had fantasized about making her cum on his cock since he was 13 years old and by now he was more than desperate for her.
There were a few nights he actually snuck into the dorms and into her room, watching her sleep up close, trailing his fingers down her body, hating that he can’t just crawl into the bed beside her and hold her tight while he shoves his cock into her and makes her fall asleep with it as deep as it can get.
2 months he watched her before knowing he needed to make her his now, before it was too late. She had been asked out on a date by a Frat guy, begging to take her to a party and Aemond knew he couldn’t allow this.
The Frat boy got a visit from him later that night, waking up to Aemond sitting on the edge of his bed and realizing he had been tied down so tight that the ropes were cutting off circulation to his hands and feet. ‘Hello Chad, so sorry to wake you but this is a very important matter you see. Scream, and I will bash your brains in before anyone can even find out the door is locked, got it?’ He nodded quickly, terror in his eyes and Aemond found that he loved it, he loved scaring people that would hurt his Princess, she doesn’t deserve the kind of treatment this idiot would give her and Aemond knew that party wasn’t anything more than to make fun of his girl. The Frat assholes all getting a freshman girl to come to the ‘party’ and whichever guy could get their girl to put out first won some bullshit prize.
No. His Princess would not be humiliated like that.
‘You see Chad, you are bringing a girl back here tomorrow night, her name is Y/n, yes?’ He nodded again.
‘I didn’t know she was your girl, she didn’t say anything like that! I would never-‘
‘Yes you would, don’t lie to me Chad, boyfriend or not you would happily have brought her back here and made her a part of your little game.’ His eyes widened, unsure how Aemond could possibly know about that. ‘You’re not going to pick her up tomorrow Chad, do you understand? I will not have my Princess hurt and humiliated by an idiotic asshole who realistically couldn’t make a girl smile let alone cum. Now, this is just a warning of course, if I find out you went anywhere near her after our little conversation here, I would have to do something far worse than break into your disgusting Frat house and break your eye socket, do you get me?’
‘Yes! Yes, I-wait…break my wha-‘ quickly Aemond brought the bat he had picked up from the floor, down against the jackasses face, shoving the edge of his blanket into his mouth as he went to scream.
‘Secretly, I hope you do try something just so I get to have an excuse to come back here and break every one of your ribs before I ensure no women will ever say yes to a date with you again.’ He flicked open a blade, holding it against Chads face and hearing him whimper like a bitch. ‘It’s okay Chad, I’m not going to hurt you as long as you do what I’ve said here tonight. Are we on the same page?’ He nodded quickly and Aemond stood, walking out of the room and leaving the house, deciding on taking the bat with him, just in case.
The next night Y/n waited in the Quad at 9 o’clock, cursing out the asshole who didn’t pick her up and feeling the tears welling up in her eyes. She had been so alone here all this time, in a place she didn’t want to be at in the first place and just when she thought someone might be interested in her, even an asshole Frat jock, he stands her up. She felt like she couldn’t hold it in anymore, trying to muffle her cries with the sleeves of her hoodie before hearing someone speak to her.
‘Are you alright Princess?’ Princess? No one had called her Princess since-
Her head snapped up and she saw a very tall man standing about 5 feet away, he was lanky but still covered in muscle that you could clearly see through his tight henley shirt, he wore jeans and heavy boots with his silver hair tied in a bun at the back of his head. They black eyepatch sealed the deal for her though, if she didn’t already assume who this is, now she knows. ‘Aemond? Is that you?’
‘In the flesh…why are you crying Princess?’ He moved to sit beside her on the edge of the fountain and she just stared at him in shock.
‘I…I got stood up-what are you doing here?!’ He smiled sweetly and she couldn’t help but think how handsome her best friend had become…he’s a panty dropper!
‘I’m in New York setting up a branch here for Dad, the school however, my father has recently become a benefactor of, Daeron wants to come to school here for a year to start his doctorate in 2 years, you know dad, start bribing them as early as possible.’ He joked and she giggled, remembering exactly how Viserys used to be. She never had seen him much, which she understood was Aemond’s experience too, but he was always very sweet to her, bringing her gifts and sweets with all of his other children since she was there almost 100% of the time.
‘Did you know I was here?’ He nodded and she glared half heartedly at him. ‘Why didn’t you tell me?!’ She raged, punching him in the arm.
‘We’ll mostly because I sent a letter a few years after you left and your grandmother wrote back that I would receive a restraining order if I ever contacted you again. That’s why I never reached out online either, I didn’t want to get you in trouble if she found out.’ Her face fell as he told her that and her tears began streaming again. ‘No more tears Princess, please? Such a gorgeous girl should never feel the need to shed a tear.’ He reached up, taking her face in his hands and wiping her tears with his thumbs tenderly.
‘I’m sorry she did that to you! I wanted to talk to you so badly, everyday! She was so awful to my mom and I thought maybe I would be able to talk to you when we were older but she kept tabs on everything I ever did and now I’m being forced to go to this shitty fucking school and live on campus all alone, and suffocate under a course load that I didn’t want in the first place…I just wanted to paint…and the first time I think maybe I could actually not be completely alone here I get stood up by an asshole Frat jerk!’ Aemond had pulled her to his chest as soon as she started ranting, knowing she needs someone to be there for her and he was determined to make sure it was him. ‘And now I’m ranting to you when you clearly have places to be, I’m sorry!’ She tried to pull away but he didn’t let her, lifting her into his lap for good measure and smiling at the squeak that came from her when she was sat down on him.
‘None of that Princess, you have always been and will always be most important, and I finished my meeting. I’m all yours.’ He said it in a way that he hoped she would hear his dedication to her, and she did, she heard it and couldn’t help but hope he meant he really was all hers. ‘Do you have classes tomorrow?’ She shook her head, resting it against his chest and he felt his entire body heat up as he held her to him firmly, determined that no one would ever take her away again. ‘Okay, then here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to go back to my place, you’re going to borrow some clothes and we’re going to order dinner-‘
‘No, you have things to do, you’re working here, I can’t-‘
‘No, I can’t! I can’t leave you like this, and I won’t, I will take care of you…you’re mine Princess.’ She looked up at him shocked and he tried his best to convey how hard it’s been without seeing her for the last 14 years. ‘I let them take you from me once, I won’t do it again now that I’ve found you…don’t make me let you go back to a dorm all alone…I won’t do it Y/n.’ She nodded her head quickly, wrapping her arms around his neck and hugging him tightly.
‘I missed you so much Aemond, if you’re sure you’re not too busy-‘
‘I will never be too busy for you. My weekend is yours, come on.’ He helped her stand up but didn’t let go of her, keeping his arm around her waist as he took her bag and led her down to the parking lot where his car is waiting. Aemond opened the door and lifted her into the car, hearing her gasp as he man handled her in, not once complaining about it. The drive was quick back to his home, it was an apartment in a high rise building and he loved watching her eyes slowly widen as she watched the numbers on the elevator go up and up, all the way to the top.
‘You have a penthouse apartment?’ He nodded, smirking down at her and she shoved him playfully.
‘Surely you can’t forget how we live Y/n, you think my father would let me stay anywhere else. Even if I am the least favorite, he insists on a certain condition of living for his family…he would be appalled by your state by the way, and I’m sure once I tell him he will be fixing it-‘
‘What are you talking about? I’m already in a single dorm, I have everything I-‘
‘You shouldn’t be living in a dorm room with God knows how many other women all sharing a bathroom, you’re basically family-‘
‘But I’m not.’ She cut him off and he looked at her startled as he opened the door. ‘Look at this place Aemond! It’s an apartment and I could never afford something like this! I love that you think of me as a sister and your parents think of me like an honorary child but I’m not, I am a peasant compared to you and that will never change, we live in 2 different worlds Aemond.’ He stared at her, trying to calm himself before opening his mouth.
‘You loved being a part of our family…you never judged me for how I lived before-‘
‘I’m not judging you-‘
‘But you are! I don’t like the idea that you think we’re in 2 different worlds, because I never want to exist in a world where you are not beside me, you will never live like that again, not now that I’ve found you. And the fact that you think I ever thought of you like a sister…well it’s just disgusting.’ He explained, leaning down and brushing his lips against hers as lightly as possible before moving to the kitchen, putting her bag on the couch. ‘Now, what would you like for dinner? Are you still a pizza girl, or would you like Chinese? We can get burgers too.’ He offered, pulling out a burger place menu, knowing that’s what she would pick and she quickly did, her whole face red in a heavy blush.
They ordered dinner and Aemond had a man go and pick it up for them while they chose a scary movie to watch. Aemond had loaned her one of his Henley’s before getting her a pair of his boxers from the drawer and letting her change, throwing her clothes into the wash and not being able to stop the creepy stalker inside of him from smelling her panties before putting them in. He had to stop himself from jumping her the second he walked back into the room, seeing his Princess wearing his clothes and sitting in his bed clearly waiting for him.
He set the food down, handing her her chocolate milkshake before stripping to his boxers and climbing into the bed beside her. He saw her try to hide her reddening cheeks as she looked at him, staring at his muscular chest before tearing her eyes away. It wasn’t until he noticed her rubbing her legs together that he felt his cock begin to twitch. She was just as effected by him as he was by her and he was going to have her!
They talked through the movie while eating, getting to know each other, mostly her getting to know him but he asked questions to things he knows the answers to but shouldn’t, and he loved that no matter how personal, she never once lied to him about anything. After all this time she still felt completely comfortable with him.
‘Oh! Mother will be so excited to see you! Come here!’ He held up his phone and pulled her to him, taking a picture of them quickly with her back to his chest as his arm wrapped across her shoulder and torso, his face nuzzled against her hair. It smelled like mangos and pomegranates, everything about her was just perfect.
‘Wait! You’re shirtless! She’s gonna think-‘
‘What?’ He asked, smirking down at her, humor written all over his face as he waited for her to say it. ‘What is she going to think, Princess?’
‘Nothing, never mind.’ She rolled her eyes, leaning against him as the movie finished, Aemond now laying down on the pillows with her head on his chest as if they were children at a sleepover once again.
‘I really did miss you Y/n…there wasn’t one day that I didn’t think about you.’ He willed his cock to stop twitching as she traced her finger around his stomach.
‘I missed you too, I never forgot about you Aemond. You know, I often wondered how someone who had been in my life for such little time could be such a big part of it but you were…you are. I never stopped loving you.’ He took hold of her chin, turning her head to face him and traced her bottom lip with his thumb lightly.
‘I am never leaving you again…tell me you’re mine.’ She gasped quietly, hesitating only a moment before nodding. ‘I know you want me…tell me you’re mine Y/n…tell me.’
‘I’m yours-‘ He cut her off instantly, lips crashing to hers hard and pulling her against his chest firmly. One arm held her waist firmly while his other hand buried his fingers into her hair. He licked her bottom lip, his tongue instantly exploring her mouth as she parted them, sucking her tongue between his lips and making her giggle. Her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling the hair tie out and tugging it firmly prompting him to bite down on her lip roughly making her squeal.
‘Such fun noises you make, you’ve no idea how long I’ve wondered what you would sound like for me!’ He rolled on top of her, hauling her legs up around his waist and grinding his crotch against her.
‘Oh! Oh Fuck Aemond! Feels so good!’ She whined as he ground his hard cock down against her.
‘You have no idea Princess, I’m going to make you see stars.’ He swore, grabbing ahold of the bottom of his shirt and pulling it up and off of her. ‘So fucking perfect baby, perfect fucking tits!’ His lips wrapped around her rosy nipple, sucking hard and chuckling when her back arched up into him as he did this. He switched tits, pulling her hardened peak between his teeth teasingly before beginning to kiss and suck his way down her stomach, fingers catching on her boxers and pulling them down, throwing them off to the side of the bed. He took a pause, leaning back and looking down at her…Finally seeing his girl on his bed laid out for him…nothing could be sweeter. She closed her legs awkwardly, unsure why he stopped but he quickly caught them, yanking them apart again roughly. ‘No you don’t gorgeous! You’re mine, all mine. I’m allowed to look at what’s mine. All fucking mine.’ He growled, leaning back down and shoving his face between her legs, tasting her for the first time. Aemond lifted her legs onto his shoulders, sucking on her clit and grinning as he heard her loud, needy cries.
‘Fuck, yes! Please? Please Aemond, don’t stop?!’ Stop? Stop? What is Stop? He couldn’t define that word right now, it didn’t fucking exist to him as he flattened his tongue and traced it down to her hole, pushing into her and moaning at how tight his little cunt was for him. He peeked up at her as he began fucking into her with his tongue, his nose brushing against her clit and making her squeal. ‘Oh God!’
‘No!’ He cut her off, fingers rubbing hard at her clit as he looks up at her and she tries to pull away from the almost painful attention on her body. ‘Tonight, I am your God. Do you understand me? Tonight you pray to me while I worship this body. Yes?’
‘Yes! YES! Please God, Please?!’ She sobbed, tears falling from her eyes now as she teetered on the edge, so close and needing one last push.
‘Yes Princess.’ He moaned, pushing his long fingers into her and shoving her over that edge just as she needed, watching her face contort in ecstasy as she came, hips lifting off of the bed as she screamed.
‘Fuck Aemond!’
‘There’s my good girl! Cumming so good for me.’ He kissed his way back up her body, removing his boxers as he did and leaning against her, taking his thick cock in his hand and preparing to push himself into her. ‘How do you feel baby?’ She just moaned, nodding her head and pulling him down to kiss her and as she did he pressed his cock against her hole, driving his hips home and finding her cute little squeal completely adorable. ‘So good!’ Aemond groaned, pulling out and pushing into her again. ‘So fucking tight on me, aren’t you?’ She nodded, her mouth hanging open as if screaming but no sound was coming out. ‘Yes you are, so good to me, this little pussy loves my cock so much, feel how she’s pulsing around me? She knows my cock is the only one that can make you feel like this. The only one that ever will again.’ He had picked up his pace and was now slamming into her over and over again. ‘You’re mine now Princess, all mine! Mine to care for, mine to love, mine to fuck! Isn’t that right?’
‘Yes! Yes Aemond! All yours! Please, please never stop! Oh Fuck!’
‘No need to beg Baby.’ Tears were now leaking down her cheeks and he knew he had her just where he wanted her. He could get her to agree to anything he’d like. He felt her cunt tighten around him and watched her eyes roll up as she came around his cock, squeezing so good he could make a case for why this wasn’t Earth anymore but Heaven that they were tethered to. His thumb found her clit as he sat back, thrusting into her at a rapid pace and feeling his end approaching quickly, throwing her into another orgasm before allowing himself to finish, burying his cock inside of her as deeply as he could and filling her up. ‘That’s it. Good Girl, taking all of me so good. I’m gonna take you home, back to where you belong with our family. No more school you don’t want to be in, no more grandparents you despise, just you and me and all of the babies that I’m going to fill this body with. How does that sound?’ Y/n’s responding moan was answer enough for him, whether it was meant to be or not. ‘All mine now Princess…all mine.’
Aemond T. Masterlist
Stalker Aemond Moodboard
#house of the dragon aemond#house of targaryen#house of the dragon#house targaryen#hotd dragons#hotd season 1#hotd aemond#hotd x reader#hotd imagine#hotd smut#hotd#aemond oneshot#aemond targaryen smut#aemond targaryen fic#aemond targaryen imagine#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond#aemond targaryen x oc#aemond one eye#aemond targaryen#prince aemond#aemond the kinslayer#aemond x reader#aemond x oc#aemond smut#stalker!aemond#Stalker!Aemond Targaryen#ewan mitchell#modern!aemond#modern!Aemond Targaryen
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Im sorry i have to say it..: Get Your Hands Dirty sounds like a love song.
HEAR. ME. OUTT!! (No i dont mean a love song between Chloe n Ella omg 😭)
What I'm implying here is that it sounds like one of those niche high school love stories when one of the lovers(most likely a goodie two-shoes) goes to their mentor/parent/even the person their loving/etc to ask for advice on relationships. Or more specifically, if this person is worth it or even a good person. From the top of my head: I Won't Say (I'm In Love) and the goodie and the wildchild dynamic is pretty similar to Gabriella and Troy from hs musical, which iws(iil) kinda inspired this post tbh but also ive been thinking about this ever since i first watched the movie. (You plop in ur own songs, i js KNOW this trope exists)
Now that we've established the well used niche trope existing in this niche song made by the niche king that is Disney.... why do i think that Get Your Hands Dirty is a love song, i hear?
Lets analyze THE LYRIICS 😈😈
"Right and wrong, cruel and kind, who's to say?" "There's a code that I believe in."
"Robin Hood" "yeah?" "Awesome guy" "yeah!"
"Every choice, you're gonna find there's shades of grey." "There are rules for a reason!"
"So you could then cross that line, theoretically."
"You'd agree?" "But he stole for the poor."
"The decision's always up to you. When there's only one thing left to do"
"I don't know you anymore.."
Okay, so i shortened and made it tiny for obvious reasons, that bein its too long 😭 so! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO GETS A FEEELIN?? a feelin that this is SCREAMING denial?! Its giving...
Chloe: Ellaaaa.... this girl im talkn to is SOOO HHHOOOOTT and PRETTY and cool and stuff but ugh.... SHE EEEVILLL!!
Ella: oh my gosh.. STFU. Shes prolly not even that evil ill prove it smh..
*get ur hands dirty starts playing. No exaggeration. No cap.*
"Okay, but there's some universal truths you must recognize." "Like?"
"Valiant knights, pure and good, guaranteed" "That depends on what they're fighting for"
"Creepy witches selling potions for evil deeds" "She could have kids she's providing for"
"If your good-good things will come to you"
MORE denial, Chloe wants to be friends with Red SO bad she looks stupid, but she brings herself back by trying to prove to herself that she's evil and they SHOULDN'T be that close. Which also is a big sign of comphet and heteronormativity, i would know 🧍 (which is a post for another day i might make. Prolly 2 prove that Chloe is a lesbian in deep comphet)
"But just how far do you go? How much do you compromise? Oh, tell me, how do you know. Where do you draw the line?"
"There's nothing I wouldn't do. If my heart tells me it's right. If it's for someone I love. If it's to save a life."
"To save your life."
Further deepening the trope i mentioned. The first line could be interpreted as a double meaning since the song is kind of mostly about Chloe coming to terms with the fact Red isn't really evil or as bad as she thought, plus the argument of where the line between evil and good is. It could refer to Red or Ella, maybe both, but Ella changes the meaning with her own experiences so it drifts off the focus from Red because we cant have ANYTHING 🤧 but i still believe Chloe intended it to be for Red since the entire song is really just for the progress of their relationship n stuff.
Now this could definitely all be in my head, yes, Disney would most likely NEVER canonize or even imply heavily a queer relationship or anything lgbtq on a pre established franchise (cowards.). But there is always a chance.... deep inside the dark heart of the mouse..
Plus, with the subtle hints here and there of Red and Chloe's relationship growing, romantically or not, they are still super close and love eachother alot. Chloe is js (kinda) canonically a girl kisser who cant help but find a girl kissable (same)
And don't get me started on this movie and its obsession with love and proving how it is not "ain't it". Hello...? They set the tone of love, but i see NO person close enough to Red established for this message (other than Chloe) and if they introduce some random guy in the next movies, NO ONE would care nor would they want it unless somehow its 100x better than redcharming, but thats impossible cz wlw 4 life.
So, this entire thingy is me basically finding scraps and wanting to provr that charminghearts IS canon and WILL be established soon! (Im delulu)
#currently watching kylie's elastic music video and i am... hypnotized to sau the least. omg. unmmm.... HHHH 😍😍#glassheart#glassrose#redcharming#charminghearts#red x chloe#chloe x red#descendants#descendants disney#descendants fandom#descendants cinderella#descendants chloe#descendants ror#descendants rise of red#descendants red#d:ror#rise of red#the rise of red
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Alright I just clocked out for the day time to talk about the Tubbo Time Loop AU
When broken the deep slate chest sends the server back what 5 minutes? So what happens when the chest keeps being broken in one day? Time loop.
Pre-purgatory 2
It starts like a normal day, Tubbo wakes up on the factory floor. Sunny shows up, they work on making the factory sorting system more efficient. Fit shows up, Pac soon follows. they depart together after leaving Ramon to help out with the logistics of the storage system. Tubbo gets some help from Ramon.
Fit and Pac show back up to the factory a little beat up. Nothing too bad Pacs just limping a little. they hang out a bit on the factory floor. Tubbo breaks the deep slate chest.
It starts like a normal day, Tubbo wakes up on the factory floor. Sunny shows up, all the work he did yesterday has been rolled back. He asks fit if anything that happened yesterday was rolled back for him. Fit is confused and, no nothing he did yesterday was rolled back. Fit shows up, Pac soon follows. they discuss and Tubbo eventually comes to the conclusion that the deep slate chest is probably the reason why. Fit and Pac leave Ramon to help fix the sorting system.
they come back a bit later a little beat up. Nothing too bad Pacs just limping a little. they hang out a bit on the factory floor. a creeper snuck through the door and blows up right next to the deep slate chest
It starts like a normal day, Tubbo wakes up on the factory floor. Sunny shows up, all the work he did yesterday has been rolled back. Tubbo screams. Fit shows up, Pac soon follows. They are a bit concerned that their friend is laying face down on the ground ranting about the deep slate chest. Why is it an issue? Tubbo says that they're gonna leave to go shag, because Pac keeps coming back limping. Pac is confused as to why he would be the one limping in that scenario. -
"and you guys keep leaving to go shag while I'm trying to figure out the time loop thing" -T
"woah woah woah" -F
"why would I be the one limping?" -P
(Tubbo doesn't know that they have to clear out a big black concrete structure later in the day) Tubbo breaks the chest to prove a point.
It starts like a normal day, Tubbo wakes up on the factory floor. Sunny shows up, He didn't do any work yesterday to get rolled back.
He spends the rest of the day with sunny working on Sunny's house so maybe the chest doesn't get broken. Fit shows up, Pac soon after. They leave Ramon to help construct the walls of the house.
they come back a bit later a little beat up. Nothing too bad Pacs just limping a little. Fit and Ramon leave to go work on some quests, Pac soon leaves as well to go work on his projects. Tubbo falls asleep on the floor of the house.
I cannot tell if I want to keep It going or to end it here TBH But still the concept stands. Tubbo Time Loop AU
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end to end for director's cut
end to end, post canon kaneson, 5.8k, rated T
As the sun sets on the last day of Heungmin’s career, the sky over Tottenham Hotspur Stadium turns a deep shade of navy blue.
OMG okay so firstly this fic was written specifically for my beloved @roykentalwaysremains , whose fresh tottenham hotspur fixation i capitalized on to drag him into the pits of rpf hell with me.
In a lot of ways end to end is a love letter to max and you elle and everyone else we spent last season watching footy with. It’s definitely wish fulfillment!! But also me putting the hope out into the universe that a time and place that brought me a lot of joy stays whole & important in some way.
Commentary on specifics below the cut!
When it came to choosing which players would come back for Sonny’s testimonial, I struggled with imposter syndrome in a real way LOL. Obviously, I did not follow spurs at the time (or at this time currently. Or really in any other way than through my pocket of friends who are spurs fans) and don’t have a great grasp of those guys, their talent level & potential longevity, their narratives, etc etc. Future fics will never be evergreen but you never want something you’ve put effort into to be completely obsolete, like, three months later. Eventually, I leaned into the wish fulfillment of it all and decided to be vague about the specific roster of guys on Sonny’s testimonial team (as well as any details about their opposition)
I mean, testimonials are barely even done anymore LOL and I can’t imagine the trend will reverse in the handful of years until Sonny retires.
More than any of them, Heungmin knows Harry’s rough edges. There used to be nothing left of Harry to discover. Then Harry went to Germany. Six years later, Heungmin feels a bit like Brennan, wide-eyed and amazed, not sure what to expect.
This line, as well as a few others from later sections of the fic, is essentially all that remains of the first fic I had vaguely planned to write for Max’s birthday. That fic, discussed in length BEFORE spurs and bayern did NOT play into the kaneson narrative with their friendly in Korea this summer, would have followed their meeting there. messages i sent to Max when we were discussing it:
so much potential here tbh��. kaneson meeting again on the field after h left but in son’s home country….. something something home something strangers something something….. sonny had lived a full life in korea that h would never know, and until a year before son had known h in the only place he’d ever called home, but maybe in five, ten years h would be as strange to son as son’s life before tottenham was to h…..
i’m envisioning them meeting up after the game and son takes him to his favorite place back home and they catch up and realize like. there’s no separate harry or son pre or post spurs. they’re both complete people and always have been and the best thing about loving someone else is spending your whole life getting to know them because no one is ever truly entirely Knowable and spurs is not the end all be all of Harry and Son, it’s just the place where for a while they were able to exist together. and they’ll always love it for that….
spurs is a place and spurs is a time but more importantly spurs was something they chose to be together. and bitch guess what….. NOTHING CAN TAKE THAT AWAY FROM THEM
and then Harry Kane decided he wasn’t a team player and WASNT AT THE KOREA FRIENDLY 👎👎👎👎👎
anyways
I really debated where I wanted H to end up in his retirement MLS career. He WILL be going in MLS I have no doubts about this, but idk for some reason I couldn’t imagine him on the west coast, but I also couldn’t imagine him specifically at one of the two evil New York teams with their multi club owners LOL. For a minute I was like …Boston??? New England Rev?? But then I decided fuck it, if Lamps went into the City system so can Harry. to NYCFC it is
When Heungmin came to Tottenham the new grounds were nothing but an abstract promise, loose dirt and construction vehicles and scaffolding. Months often went by with little to no visible progress. Many times Heungmin wondered if Tottenham Hotspur Stadium would ever be more than a half-constructed pile of steel beams and rubble. Yet despite everything, in front of them shines this glittering, otherworldly stadium that Harry and Heungmin get to call home before anyone else. The gradual transformation makes Heungmin believe that what they’re building, he and Harry and all the other lads on the team, will grow to become what it was always meant to be.
It’s not the grounds, Harry insists. It’s them. Heungmin doesn’t see the difference.
A thread that runs throughout most of my writing is the way that memory dwells in place. This fic is certainly an example of that! My academic research has a lot to do with the way that people construct identities based on place and space, and that comes through in how I connect setting to character.
Taking Harry seriously as a competitor adds a touch of normalcy to their relationship that Son hasn’t felt for a long time. Their friendship is not a sacred, delicate flame to hold close to his chest. It does not need protection from the wind.
This is another remnant of the previously mentioned AU. It’s also one of my favorite lines in the fic.
“It was kind of nice, actually,” Dele says. “Made the rest of us look better for once. I swear, bro, I nutmegged you at least eight times that day.”
I’ve heard that Dele was notorious for nutmegging his teammates relentlessly back in the day.
“Really? All that for fucking Bloodborne?” says Brennan, looking at Heungmin, as Harry walks off.
Heungmin laughs. “Don’t look at me! I still don’t remember. I don’t think I would stay up late for two weeks.”
This moment is a really important one for Sonny, just as important as his and Harry’s kiss a few scenes earlier. When he doesn’t remember a pretty small detail that doesn’t quite match up with how he thinks about himself from back then, he’s prompted to reflect on how much he’s changed since then. In this fic, Sonny sort of lives in the past, especially in the moments of his past where he felt the potential for things that never truly materialized. On a small scale, he’s forced to reckon with the fact that no matter what, he is a fundamentally different person than he was during the period of his life that will forever define his career. I think Tottenham as a club — and Sonny here in this fic, representing them — has a tendency to self-mythologize. And when buy into your own narrative, it can be too easy to overlook the messier parts of your past that don’t fit so well into that narrative.
Anyways those are most of the thoughts I have on that fic!! Thank you for the ask elle ILY!!!
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one more hour
remember how i said i’m not doing anymore rick content? well it’s been a few days and i couldn’t help myself. sorry y’all 🫶🏼 his speech pattern has been tripping me up too so excuse how “normal” the speech is ,, i plan on going back and editing this
i’ve been on a kick tbh sooo if you want more click here and here and here and here and here and here
rick fucks summers best friend in the kitchen.
✰just rick talking his shit , afab reader , he’s an ass but i love em
“you need to shut the fuck up y/n-like seriously do you want summer to walk in here”?
you shook your head and bit your tongue. despite his palm being clamped against your mouth muffled groans could still be heard. it wasn’t your fault he was making you feel this way though.
all you wanted to do is enjoy a nice dinner with your best friend and her family. she was going off to college soon after all. nothing too special just a pre- goodbye kind of thing.
but of course rick just can’t contain himself- he’s eager to get one last fuck in before you go off with his granddaughter.
“fuckkk-i’m gonna fill you up and you’re gonna keep my cum inside you every single day so those boys at school know you’re fucking taken”.
the groan that came next was muffled against his palm. you’d love nothing more, like a proper slut of course.
gripping the counter you tried your best to bite down on all the noise threatening to leave your mouth. the sound of skin on skin was progressively getting louder. if you weren’t so cockdrunk you’d worry about summer or one of her family meme hers walking in. but in your state of mind that was not happening.
“make yourself useful and move your right leg up-no your right leg fucking idiot. you’re that high off cock you don’t know your right from left? stupid whore”. rick grabbed your leg and moved it up , giving himself the perfect angle to reach deep into your stomach. “there we go , just needed a little help hmm”?
just that tiny bit of praise was enough to open the flood gates of your body , your vision went blurry as you came all over his abdomen. the noises you made were nothing short of pornographic.
finally rick let go of your mouth, slowly as to make sure you don’t make any sudden noises. “t-that was amazing mr. sanchez”. you breathed out,not moving from your previous position aside from moving your head to meet his gaze
“oh sweetheart we’re not done. that was just the appetizer. just wait till we’re done with this ridiculous dinner”.
#day by day i lose it a little more#like im slipping#im hyperfixating again#and ofc it’s an old man#a science one#i need to sleep#and drink some water#take a cold shower maybe#bc i am insane#rick sanchez x reader#rick sanchez smut#rick sanchez#rick and morty#smut#smutty dialogue#smutty drabble#smutty blurb#tw he’s a perv#like big time#esha writes
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Watching you dancing in your platform shoes You look so pretty in these reds and blues Baby, please, I know we're diving deep And you can barely breathe I'm scared completely that you'll up and leave me Is it worth this feeling?
Who are we kidding? That night in Milwaukee Was already starting
Your hair in my mouth Pull me down to the couch Oh, I want you right now And everyone tells me My heart beats for nothing But something is changing
I've still got that ring that you let me wear In that haunted swimming pool, I know you felt me there You'll win this hide, don't try to change my mind I feel so sure this time
Standing in just your t-shirt I know that this will hurt If you let go of me first
Who was I kidding? That night in Milwaukee You already had me
Your hair in my mouth Pull me down to the couch Oh, I want you right now I want you right now And everyone tells me My heart beats for nothing But something is changing
Standing in just your t-shirt Something is changing If you let go of me first Something is changing
***
@karatecaulfield back to making the lesbians little graphics and such!!!
Actually posting it is my birthday present to myself XD I just turned 26!!! This just in: Getting old isn't actually that scary. It might be when my health starts failing and whatnot, but for now I am vibing. Might finally get a job soon, too, so I can now shitpost without worrying about money constantly!!!
Also YO I MADE THIS AGES AGO BUT I NEVER POSTED BECAUSE I KEPT OBSESSING OVER THE PERFECT RUBY RING HELP
Truly what has obsessing over a couple of rich lesbians done to me akanhdusygduyis Do you know how much I would've cared about finding the perfect picture of a ruby ring 3 years ago??? 0%. YasMoon has forever altered me. There's no going back to who I once was.
I still debated myself for a long-ass time because like. I was like is that TOO much red nail polish??? Should I crop it out in the middle left pic??? Is it more symbolically poetic or whatever if only YASMINE has flashy red nail polish??? Is she the only one between them who gets to act like a showy tropical bird doing a mating dance??? But then I was like nah...wearing matching nail polish is 4000% one of those coupley-things-we're-gonna-pass-off-as-best-friend-things Yasmine and Moon would definitely do. And they both look damn good in it, so. Fuck it!!! They went matchy matchy to their secret hotel date!!!
So I got kind of obsessed with the idea of a YasMoon songfic based on Wisconsin Ave by Kailee Morgue, where basically Yasmine secretly books a nice hotel room the night after her 15th birthday (so pre-show!) so she and Moon can have a night to themselves and finally be free to do whatever they want! I've mentioned it in previous posts, but I am like. VERY certain these two were messing around backstage during (and before) Season 1, and the idea is so JUICY that I sadly am coming up with plot bunnies about it faster than I can write them D:
For whatever reason, Wisconsin Ave is the one that keeps chewing on me like a brain worm, and may in fact become a full-length songfic one of these days ^^; So naturally, to tide me over until then, I sated this desire the only way I know how...
MOODBOARDS AND FICLETS BAYBEE
This moodboard goes with this, this, this, and this! (Might make Daze Inn its own moodboard too, if I REALLY can't Find My Chill with these things ^^;) Tangentially related, but Yasmine's blue dress at the beginning of the Halloween episode in S1 was SUCH an underrated look. Like I don't care if it was supposed to be slutty or whatever!!! It served!!! I miss her skimpy little outfits tbh, the girl can have a redemption arc without having to dress "modest" like the good girls ;_____; Let her dress like a slut!!! This is her holy divine right as a woman!!!
Also they definitely underwater kissed in that hotel pool. I know, I was there, they told me themselves--
In any case, Moon would absolutely see Yas spinning around in that dress in a pair of stylish platform heels and just be so fucking gone for her. I love imagining it as this sweet, blissful moment of butterflies in her stomach and the unique euphoria of young love...and then reality comes crashing down seconds later and Moon is like "oh, I am fucked." Because all they get is this one perfect night--one night to be themselves and love each other the way they want to and let loose and do whatever they want...and then they have to go home. They have to go back under the watchful eyes of parents and classmates and snotty neighbors and everyone else who they have to hide from.
And Moon has to wonder. What if this this little arrangement between--this affection limited only to where no one can see--gets to be too much for Yasmine? What if she starts wanting someone she can show off? Love in the open? Take home to her parents?
...a boy?
And she lives in that fear. She lives in the fear that Yasmine could snatch away everything they have on a moment's notice and leave her behind to pursue something a little less...complicated.
She feels it all night--watching Yasmine dance, kissing her on the suite couch, wearing the ring Yasmine got as a birthday gift with their feet dangling in the Universal Studios Hilton pool that some kid supposedly drowned in. Waking up in Yasmine's shirt the next morning.
Knowing that she's Yasmine's, whether she wants to be or not. Moon is in too deep to pull herself away now.
The other girls in their group sneer at her. They see how she looks at Yasmine. They know the admiration in her eyes go beyond platonic.
And they hate her, because she's the only one that Yasmine gives any of that back to. She's The Favorite. The right-hand Beta Bitch. Unquestionably second in their lunch table's pecking order. She calls the shots far more than any of the other girls are allowed.
Not that Moon feels the need to call shots. But it's still a privilege not afforded to the girls who throw snide, passive-aggressive comments her way.
It'd bother Moon more if Yasmine actually gave a shit. But their "friends" are irrelevant to the queen bee beyond how good they can make the table look to the rest of the school.
Harper Moreno confronts her one time. Corners Moon on the way to history class--a class she notably doesn't share with Yasmine.
"I know you want Yasmine." Harper doesn't mince words. "I see you over there, leering at her all lunch. You're wasting your time."
"I don't--"
"No use lying about it." Harper's eyes flash coldly. "You really think you're the only one of us who's ever wanted to fuck her? You're not special, Moon."
Moon sways on her feet, caught off-guard.
"Did you ever...?"
"Not me, no. But I know others who have."
Yasmine would tell her Harper's trying to get the better of her. Work her up until she loses her composure and gives Harper the kind of undignified reaction she wants. Something she can get Aubrey or Jenna--probably hiding somewhere in a nearby crowd--to stealthily record and put on her Instagram story.
Something to bring her down so Harper can fill the now-vacant spot of Yasmine's second-in-command.
Moon isn't going to have it.
"You don't know me," she says coldly. "You don't know her. I matter to her in a way you don't."
It's a cruel thing to say. Yasmine would approve.
So much of what Moon does hinges on that these days.
Moon doesn't like the conniving smile Harper gives her. The way the other girl steps forward, putting only a few inches between them before leaning forward and hissing in her ear.
"It's all for nothing, you know. Your little crush. Yasmine will throw you away once she's done with you, just like she does with everyone."
As Harper saunters off, she throws one last sneer over her shoulder.
"I've known her since middle school, by the way. I've learned by now you don't get attached. Maybe you should wise up, too."
Most everyone else she talked to told her something similar. Her mom warned her away even more strongly.
"I went to high school with that type of girl too, Moonchild. They'll break your heart. Plain and simple."
But on the morning after Yasmine's 15th, looking at herself in a hotel mirror clad in Yasmine's clothes...
Moon has her doubts.
After all, it's not just any girl Yasmine invites for a private getaway in a luxury room. And if the loose Paris t-shirt hanging off her, the ruby ring still on her bedside table, and the bright red nail polish Yasmine picked solely to match Moon's are any indication...
Yasmine seems to have gotten pretty tangled up herself.
And something is shifting. The way Yasmine's sprawled out on the bed with her hair a rumpled mess on the pillows, drool trailing from her mouth...
It's imperfection she's never dared show before. Every past time she and Moon screwed around, one always fled before the morning came.
Now here Yasmine is, messy and flawed and laying it all bare for Moon to see. Trusting Moon with it.
It feels like the beginning of something.
Not the beginning of a "real" relationship. Moon isn't that naive.
But the beginning of Yasmine considering what they have is deeper than she planned?
That Moon can hope for.
***
(This is Harper btw)
I gave her a personality and a backstory!!! She fucking sucks and I'm very excited to write more of her being a menace <3
I do fr wonder about the other girls at Yasmine and Moon's S1 table. Like who are they??? Did they really all just ditch tf out of Yasmine after the wedgie incident??? Why did Yasmine deem them in particular worthy of the Rich Girl Clique, but only sometimes (since it's different extras at the lunch table in different scenes)???? Anyways, I imagine they prolly were passive-aggressive terrors to Moon because of all the blatant favoritism and special treatment she got from the Alpha Bitch. There was so totally inner bullying going on in that clique, and someday!!! I will write about it more than anyone ever asked for!!!
Anyways!!! More posts about Best Lesbians coming soon :3 As always, moodboard pic credits available upon request!
#yasmoon#yasmine x moon#moon x yasmine#aesthetic#moodboard#yasmine cobra kai#moon cobra kai#cobra kai#cobra kai season 1#(or pre season 1 anyways)#femslash#wlw#lesbian
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“and learning later on she was very close to broken emotionally following the 12/13 season” 🥺😰😭 could you explain it? I don’t know nothing about it!! 😭😭😭
In their book there is a moment after 2013 worlds where she seriously considers not wanting to continue competing. But she says after they attended Olympics camp in Vancouver before the start of the 2013/14 (Olympic) season, she felt motivated to go for it. I’ve never heard or read of Scott saying the same thing/feeling the same. They also say in the book Tessa had lost faith in Marina well before Scott had, it took him longer to really see that she wasn’t on their side/didn’t have their backs (i’d be really interested to know their feelings on this and how that caused that bit of a rift - likely the second of their only two major fights in their career, what affect T feeling that way had on scott and.. did it cause him guilt, had he felt he had kept them in a situation where T didn’t feel safe and happy ? i’d be interested to know how they worked through that) and they have both since said/alluded to really not being at their best (motivation, athletic peak, as well as supported by their team) and Marie France is on record saying they weren’t happy from really from the start of 2013 through to Sochi, another time saying TS were speaking to them in the season leading up to Sochi, during Sochi, and them always guiding them through their tough parts of their career.. (obviously lots of athletes have mentors/advisers not on their direct support team, that’s very normal but kinda interesting it seems in a way Marina wasn’t that mentor for them considering how long they’d been with her/other coaches at Canton). Then of course there is the time Scott actually said “we asked her if she thought we could win the Olympics and she never answered us”. I’m not certain but I assume this was at the start of the oly season- so they were competing that whole pre-season with a coach they knew didn’t believe in them. They have also alluded to Skate Canada not having their back (I have read stuff about TS not getting the politicking- push from their federation through publicity, influence etc and they were instead using the influence they had to push Patrick Chan for gold.. which he ended up getting silver.. that’s all for another discussion though and tbh I don’t really understand how it works). Here in the BBC commentary of their TE SD in 2018, Robbin Cousins (ex British skater) talks about how in 2013 they wanted to move to Marie and Patch ‘they wanted to leave Detroit to train in Canada and the federation wouldn’t let them’.. that’s the only time I’ve heard it put that bluntly.. TS have of course alluded to it and always talked about M+P being their mentors... TS are not ones to publicly complain- especially not during their competitive career and they maintained Marina was fair and cared about them- of course she did but it was clear to TS she didn’t fully have their backs.
It almost kinda feels in a way.. like.. they had done their job for her. They had won in 2010, won some world titles, and she had another team that was on a better trajectory to be the next ones to win and retain her crown for her. I’m not saying it is on anywhere near the same level.. but a bit like how you see happening with the Russian ladies. This happens all the time.. it happened to me in my ballet training, just thrown to the sidewalk when someone better (younger, skinnier) came along or i didnt see my career going in the direction that was convenient for the school.. idk.. I don’t want to believe this about Marina, but it happens a lot, it’s almost natural in a way, but she was wrong to think VM were past their prime, not capable of winning *fairly* that DW were the better bet, I mean they turned out to be but I take most sochi results with a grain of salt. Its as if DW were her bread winners (even though TS had had the far longer successful career (beating/placing higher than DW in essentially every competition 2006-2010) but for whatever reason.. she didn’t believe in TS anymore.. maybe she just didnt think they were good, maybe she knew DW would win it easily.. maybe there were deals bring made as allegedly.. i don’t know.. but i hate what it did to TS, i hate it just up to the point where it was the best thing that ever happened to them because it brought them so close together to the point where nothing could affect them in the moments where it counted, and it gave them the belief in themselves, the drive to come back and achieve even more and do it the right way with people who really took care of them.
Whatever the reasoning was, for TS that is devastating when your closest mentor/coach.. the person guiding you to be your best for so long has lost all faith in you.
T did not have an easy career. Just two years into seniors and two years before a home Olympics they were being prepped to win since 2005, she was taken out with injuries bad enough to require surgery. She wasn’t her best for really 4 years, then as we recently learned, she continued to struggle with it even considering a surgery in the off season before the 2018 olys!
So I admit I may have taken artist licence with T being ‘almost emotionally broken’.. because.. I don’t think she can be broken. I actually think she has the will power of the spinning iron core of the earth. I love how they say they learned how to be the best even if they weren’t at their best.. you never would’ve known what they were dealing with- the depths of it. Either people just never knew, or they got some headline-grabby, controversial narrative take on the basic facts (in the case of Sochi) and you either felt sorry for them or thought they are ungrateful/ sore losers. But the truth TS tell and as is backed up by their whole career, they fought so hard for every success they had, were so hard on themselves, learned not just to set goals, but why they were setting goals, what it meant to win a gold medal and that the real value and satisfaction was in the process. How they grew light years in their love and care for each other by building each other up- not blaming or ditching each other when they weren’t perfect or didn’t win. Creating this incredible journey together and no matter what forces were against them, realising their strength in each other. The confidence they instilled in each other to know they could accomplish anything both together and apart.
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Fuck ADHD. The inability to focus when I want to has always been a real pain in the butt for me, but I'll keep trying and gradually become better.
I've come up with an acronym mnemonic and a few steps that seem to be helping myself getting over ADHD from time to time. However, it turns out that a lot of the times it is still very difficult for me to fully focus unless an immediate due is imminent. As a university professor, I am still struggling to get my job decently done, and this has been bothering me since people suffering from ADHD (or at least myself) gain the most motivation through the sense of accomplishment and personally I get greatly demotivated from the sense of failure and not being able to finish a job in a certain pre-specified time table. To make things worse, I am a perfectionist, yet extremely unorganized.
Nevertheless, my specific acronym mnemonic is as below:
R.S.T.T.W.
R. - Remove distractions. (Step 1)
External distractions have always been ruining my focus, almost completely. Preferably, a complete removal of distractions, or even better, a complete isolation from distractions would be very beneficial for me when I try to get things done. Personally, I am very easily distracted and I am so forgetful that a tiny distraction could ruin my focus and stuff like Facebook Reels could keep me mesmerized for hours, and that brings the second letter up.
S. - Selfly awareness. (Step 2)
Ok. First off, I am not a philosopher or a psychologist (my area of expertise is actually in natural sciences) and from what I know, terms like self-awareness and self-consciousness mean totally different thing than what I am trying to convey here. The thing here is that there are a lot of times that I am not even aware of what I am doing. For instance, I could be watching Facebook Reels or YouTube Shorts for hours before I even realize that holy shit I've been doing this shit for hours. I have wasted so much time for nothing. Most of these short videos (or other distractions in general) provide scarcely anything useful aside from the entertainment purposes. However, if I keep myself reminded about the task that I am currently focusing on; i.e., if I am aware of what myself is doing all the time without being lost in thoughts or entertainment, I would be able to identify the distraction and go back to step 1 and get rid of it before I return back to work or study. I find this to me very helpful personally.
T. - Timed study / work. (Step 3)
For people suffering from ADHD (or I could be just speaking for myself :'), it is usually crucial to keep track of time and to attempt to finish tasks in time. For an unorganized person like me, this is actually extremely difficult to achieve. This is to say that the reality is usually very different from the expectation. I expect myself to do this, this and this in the next hour, but usually what happens is that I struggle to get even one of them done. Still, keeping track of time tends to psych me up, and the limited amount of time (which is also relatable to our lives since "There is only a finite amount of time in life", quoted from one of my favorite professors during my PhD time) brings tension and the urge to get things done, which usually is good. As someone suffering from ADHD (or it could just be me), I always feel like I need more pressure and I am living my life too cozily. TBH, I have enough shit to worry about in life, and theoretically that should be keeping me busy, but I just tend to be carefree and not worry about shit. Sometimes, I worry about shit that just doesn't matter instead of focusing on the thing that I should be worrying about, and that's some next-level shit. Anyways, I feel like I got distracted again. Back to step 1?
T. - Talk to yourself. (Step 4)
This may sound silly, but a conversation between me and myself actually keeps me engaged and concentrated on what I am currently on. I feel it's like a life hack to me, like just another person that came out of nowhere trying to help me, and surprisingly (or not) that person is myself! In rare circumstances, this might turn into a self interrogation since sometime I do find myself exasperating, but hey we are this one person anyways. By talking to myself, I am able to give myself clear and detailed instructions about what's gonna happen so that it would be easier to keep track and less likely to get lost.
W. - Write it down. (Step 5)
I am actually not completely positive that this should be viewed as Step 5, since through Steps 1 - 4 we should already have been writing something. Specifically here, I am talking about writing down a plan, or just some brief schedule that resonates with Step 4. To some people, writing things down may help them better than just having a conversation with themselves. Writing things down is also particularly effective when you have a big-ass task that requires multiple steps. These tasks usually sound intimidating and can often times be overwhelming. Breaking it down into small steps helps relieve the hesitance, and a lot of times gets us started. Hey, believe it or not, sometimes our minds can be unstoppably amazing as ideas can just keep popping up and a lot of times we forget about self-appreciation. Find a mirror and look into yourself. You should be appreciating how awesome we are. It is great to be born as a human being, and we should really see this as a privilege. We are able to form much more sophisticated thoughts compared to animals and that per se is worth our appreciation.
I hope this would appear helpful to someone (or maybe it's just confusing? IDK). This is my first blog and I feel like this is cool and it kind of calms me down from the pain that I'm suffering, the self-created meaningless pain LoL. English is not my native tongue so I apologize if this is terribly written. I used to blog something in Mandarin Chinese (my native tongue) but it was a while ago (maybe junior or senior high?). I miss the feeling of writing so much, and I am glad to finally write something on this 12-year-old Tumblr account. God I am feeling so fucking old and I still do not have a kid LMAO.
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Usually I draw the kind of stuff I find a lot of interest in and your fics are just prime art material, I don't draw out of obligation coz then it makes art boring for me lmao. I'd draw your other fics more often but I haven't been drawing LU very much and I've only just gotten back into drawing the boys. Time's a lot easier to draw these days coz I'm more used to drawing muscles than back in October, it's Twi's face I just can't get right anymore lol. I'm glad you like my silly ideas so much.
Admittedly I adore la-sera's art for odaahfc, it's absolutely gorgeous I wish I had half the digital talent to draw such amazing scenes. Currently working on it and building up my skills, which is why I want to redraw it.
Good luck with your objectives. I usually procrastinate my own tasks but I like to view them like side and main quests like in BotW to help me. I've even got it set out a little bit like the Sheikah Slate in a diary lol. I feel kind of bad for not chatting with you recently but I've been sleeping all odd and it's made me too exhausted to really talk to anyone on their blogs until around this week. I appreciate you coming to talk on my blog, makes me feel less lonely over there lol.
So long as you are having fun <3 Faces and muscles are both so hard. I do need to doodle the other fairies, and also all of Warriors', buuuut Warriors fairies are being taken from my HW play, so I want all the costume pieces and to dress them up with in game stuff because that pleases me.
Practice is good but sometimes a pain ^^;
Thanks! I've got... 2 fills for the goreswap exchange to do (neither especially gorey but I'm trying. It's like... T rated gore but oh well), then also I need to somehow get more chapters for In the Belly of the Whale written. I have one for this week pre-drafted, then I'm into the I've got nothing written zone oops. And a fic with Time and Navi in HW era which is... sort of part of fairyverse and so dragging LU a bit more AU for that ^^' And some fun ideas with Rulie's mother.
Eh chatting is to come and go. TBH I've not had much brain recently. House keeps falling apart, health things, family stuff got weird, you know, all that.
The side and main quests is useful! Prioritising things or something.
#ask and answer#chatting with russ#do you want to move to dms? I'm happy either way but this is permission
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YOOOO asks r open?????
tbh anything with sub thoma is good enough for me i need more dom reader content im dying
maybe add a lil bondage and some vibrators while ur at it
maybe some nipple play action
and overstim
a little edging
cock slapping too
and a blindfold
OKAYYY THATS ENOUGH BEFORE I GET CARRIED AWAY HAHAHHA HAVE A GREAT DAYYY
C0CKSL4PP1NG -> { RATED 18+ }
FEATURING: thoma, childe, xiao, kazuha and albedo.
CONTENT WARNING(S): g/n reader. bondage. blindfold. cock ring. overstimulation. handjob/blowjob. praise/degradation. dacryphilia. edging. slight jealousy. semi-public sex. minors dni.
☆ THOMA
⭐︎ — dragging thoma to your bedroom, not knowing what’s coming next however hes sure it’ll be nice right? turns out it’s even better than what he expected, the strain on his wrists and thick blindfold heightened his senses and he’s much more sensitive than he already was. tugging at the ropes he whimpered, “y/n do we really n-need to tie me up?”, you continuously palm his clothed cock, grinding on his crotch, “of course we do, this way you won’t run away when i milk you until you’ve got nothing left”, inevitably this turned him on even more— overstimulation is something thoma dreams of; the pain blending beautifully with the pleasure and only rushing to cum once more.
your hands and mouth worked magic and in a few minutes he was already cumming, bucking his hips so he could get to the back of your throat— he shouldn’t have been so surprised when you kept going even when just came but as soon he began to thrash and cry out; a sudden slap to his cock shut him up, a loud yelp emerging before he instantly closed his legs and whined, moaning and whimpering, “m-mmgh! m’sorry; h-hurts but feels so gah!~ mn so good ♡” and as the slaps continued he came once more.
☆ CHILDE
⭐︎ — tbh he actually really enjoyed the pain, sitting behind whilst his broad back is snug against your chest. pumping his cock as your palm hardly slaps his oozing tip. “m-mmn! ah! stop f-feels weird! comrade p-plea-nnngh”, along came another slap as he twitches once more, keeping a harsh grip on your wrists yet never pulling away. the shocks of jerking him off and occasionally slapping his cute cock has his eyes rolling back and back arching. of course he kept urging you to just let him cum— his suit getting rather damp from the sweat and how heavy he was breathing, the open window done nothing to keep him cool and he found himself chasing his orgasm again and again
“yesyesyes! cumming!~ mmmgh yes angh! oh my god~ cumming thank you!!~”, the amount of cum he spurted really was amazing, such a huge load and only because you punished him so lightly— you wonder how else you could punish and just how much seed he’d spill.
☆ XIAO
⭐︎ — ugh adeptus xiao so fking cute, slipping a cock ring on his pretty dick as you relish in how he grips the sheets— as much as he wants more; he knows if he doesn’t act out he’ll get an amazing reward however little does he know how jealous you’ve been, “tsk tsk seems like you enjoy spending time with lumine now hm? can she make you feel this good??”, you question whilst slapping his cock, xiao being as sensitive as he is— this one slap caused his back to arch right off the bed, “w-what do you thi-nk you’re-?! ANGH!~”, another slap to the base of his cock causing his sentence to cut short and pre cum to flow from his slit. “shh good boy~ you’ll take what i give you and you’ll enjoy it.”
long story short— he was practically a twitching mess with a pool of cum at his stomach, his entire cock a cherry red and his thighs instinctively shutting tight when you reach to stroke him once more, “n-no! s-sensitive~ t-too senst-itive!~”, his pleas and whines turning and egging you on even further.
☆ KAZUHA
⭐︎ — must you really punish him on the crux, of all places— sneaking him into the storage and continuously slapping his cock whilst he shifts and mewls in your hold. wrapping your arms around his waist never allowing him to escape. his knees are shaking and barely able to function as the sting and sharp pain jumps his nerves but the constant marking of his neck and stroking of his cock allows him to enjoy his punishment however he really had done nothing wrong. perhaps you just wanted to see his cute face morph into one of pleasure.
“s-stop!~ can’t handle it- UNGH!~ i-i haven’t done anything w-wrong!~”, oh poor kazuha, if only he knew you enjoyed toying with his body anyway— the best part was edging him from the brink of cumming, the tears rolling down his reddened cheeks as he fucks up into your fist— chasing the orgasm he lost once more
☆ ALBEDO
⭐︎ — “albedo, i’d like to conduct an experiment”, his interest was certainly piqued since he was the person who usually came up with them. however he certainly won’t decline but however he was shocked by your request. “lie down, unbuckle your belt and take your cock out— that’s all my love”, he didn’t know what you were planning to do but he was already enjoying it. the least he was expecting was for you to spread your spit on your palm and suddenly stroke his dick with such speed— despite being made of chalk he’s still surprisingly sensitive.
he was confused on why you abruptly stopped until he felt a sudden slap on his cock, he was practically screaming with each slap, your technique was beautiful, a slap then a few strokes and the process went on until he mewled and covered your hand with a pearly white, chest heaving up and down whilst he tries to catch his breathe but was certainly confused when you kept going— it were going to be a long night <3
TAGGING: @lex-lee-666 @leathernourishingshoepolish @currysrealm @kxisuke @stygianoir <3
#genshin headcanons#genshin impact x you#genshin drabbles#genshin x you#genshin impact drabbles#genshin impact headcanons#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact smut#genshin smut#thoma x reader#childe x reader#kazuha x reader#xiao x reader#albedo x reader#thoma smut#childe smut#kazuha smut#xiao smut#albedo smut#genshin scenarios#sub genshin#one of my favs <3
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a bit of a vent/update (it’s heavy). I’ve always dreaded the ‘where do you see yourself in 5 years?’ question because I honestly have never been able to picture anything for myself that felt real and tangible and something that I could actually want and achieve in the future. I would be like ‘yeah I want to be dating my future girlfriend by then’ or ‘yeah I want to be working a job that I actually like’ or ‘yeah I want to feel like I’m doing something meaningful with my life by then’ but it was all very superficial in a way, it felt like I was saying rehearsed words and although those are still things that I want, there’s a lot more detail to them now. tbh since I finished high school (almost 10 years ago at this point..) that I’ve felt really behind in life compared to my friends, and other people in general, but at the same time it took me 14/15 years to actually figure out what happened to me when I was a pre-teen and why I spent 10+ years of my life crippled by depression, so all things considered I think I came out of all that pretty okay. I started therapy about 5 years ago and altho it was a slow progress, I can at least say that I’m not on the verge of feeling suicidal anymore. I think being a teen on tumblr in 2010-2013 definitely didn’t help much with that either, the romanticisation of depression and self harm back then was Real and the last thing I should have been exposed to at the time. it was to the point that I actually tried to kill myself when I was 16, right before a family trip. I can talk about this now, but I can tell you all as well, this was a root of deep shame for me until 2020, when I finally had the courage to tell my mom and siblings about it, because it made me feel so ungrateful, stupid and generally a shit person for not appreciating everything good that I had, while at the same time it made me hate myself for not actually going through it fully, to the point that I always thought that I would take this to my grave without letting anyone know. at this point, I’ve forgiven myself for it and acknowledged that, despite how hurtful it was, this is a common pain and, unfortunately, many people know it too. No matter how much I convinced myself of it back then, I was never alone in that pain. At the same time I made really great friends here (some I’ve been friends with for over 10 years now), even met some of them in real life, and it was overall the place that made me feel comfortable enough to consider (and accept) that maybe I wasn’t straight. so not everything was bad.
it was a few weeks into 2022 when I finally figured out what had happened to me, why most of who I was so deeply lost in shame, to the point that it felt like I had been drowning most of my life. there were several things that contributed to it like, giving up who I was out of pressure to please my family (until I was around 23 - constantly hearing ‘you should let your hair grow’, ‘you should dress more like a girl’ etc etc when you’re a 10 year old really does a number), giving up the things I loved in order to pass as “normal”, my father not being emotionally available (or simply available in general tbh - unfortunately too common as well), my mom having to take care of 4 kids and therefore not really being emotionally available either, dealing with womanhood, puberty and all those nice, not at all confusing and hard, things by myself because I thought that if I could just ignore it it would not be real (a nice not at all dumb trait I got from my father - thankfully I’m over that), consequently emotionally abandoning my closest friends bc of all that further isolating myself. and I could go on and on, but the reason why I’m saying all this is that maybe it can spark a light in someone else too. Until this year, I thought that nothing had happened to me, that I had no reason to feel the way I did back then, and it was suffocating to think that while the pain I felt was very real. and you may ask ‘okay, where does shame come into the picture here?’ so here’s a few that I could identify from the things I said above - shame for my sexuality (giving up things I loved to pass as “normal”), shame for being gender non conforming (pressure to please my family), shame for not feeling connected with my parents (having friends who do have good relationships with theirs), shame for not having the life they expect of me, shame for not having the life I think I’m supposed to have to “impress” my friends, therefore hiding away, isolating myself, further convincing myself that no one else was going through the same. until I realised that, of course, I would never find other people talking about how they felt the same, because we were all hiding away.
this isn’t a story about how suddenly I’m cured from depression or anything like that, there’s still days and days, but figuring out why I felt the way I did back then was a major step towards finding healing, and I feel like I’ve been changing very rapidly over the past 5 months because of it. recognizing that my self-criticism was doing more harm than good (I wouldn’t talk to my friends the same way I talk to myself sometimes..), that I can choose self-compassion instead, and the good-old exercising, journaling, reading, eating and sleeping well, really made major differences (as well as keep going to therapy of course, it was important to have someone trained to talk about the really heavy and more complicated stuff).
in the end, this has been a journey towards (re)finding myself, and I finally have an answer to the question that I found so dreadful ‘where do you see yourself in 5 years?’. and for the first time in my life, I’m not afraid to try, I’m not afraid to fail, I’m not afraid of the set backs I may face. for the first time in my life, I can actually picture a future for myself, and I’m actually excited to see myself getting there. I don’t have it all figured out, but I do know that I’m persistent. in the end, I think this is also a bit of a letter to everyone who’s lost in life, I’m currently 27 and I’m now figuring out a path that I might actually enjoy to take and that makes sense to me. If you’re like me, you probably also feel like you’ve run out of time and that there’s no way you can still turn your life around, but to be honest, who really knows how much time we have left? You make a little bit of time now, and deal with tomorrow, 3 months, 5 years from now, when it comes. I have no idea what turns life will still take and where I’ll end up after all, but I do know that recognizing my pain, owning up to the shameful feelings I had (and still have), accepting my feelings and thoughts as they are (failing a lot and trying again), definitely took me from a drowning person to a vivid swimmer. I’ve always liked to share my thoughts here, but recently having the number of followers increase on this blog has made it feel quite... intimidating to share pieces of my life like before. still, this was something I felt was important for me to share, even if just to say, feeling lost and behind in life is a normal part of the human experience.
#this is also why I haven't been around as much as before#I'm still keeping up with dc and stuff but creating content here is falling a bit on my priority list rn...#people following me for long now know how much time of my life I've dedicated to helping dc grow and succeed#and I don't regret any of it#in the end being their fan was and still is something that was really good for me and I'm sooooooooo thankful#but they're working towards their dreams and now I want to focus on working towards mine as well#will still make content every now and then ofc this isn't a goodbye or anything#but I won't be making like 3 gifsets per day or something like I used to before SKDFJH#anyway if you read all of this thank you and I hope you have a nice day <3#jt
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Crybaby
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x f!reader (College AU)
Warnings: smut, ass fingering, orgasm denial, humiliation, lots of talks about panties.
Summary: You catch Bucky trying to steal your panties on laundry day.
A/N: this is partly @buckycuddlebuddy ‘s fault tbh. Enjoy some desperate, horny Bucky. Minors DNI.
The timer on the dryer unit you’d occupied went off, signaling that your weekly load of laundry was dry and ready. Bucky cast a nervous glance around the eerily empty room, fingers twitching in the front pocket of his hoodie.
He knew it was wrong, but his laundry was done too (just a coincidence, really, not like he’d wake up at 3 am on a Monday because he knew you did your washing around that time), and you weren’t there yet. You usually retrieved your load in the morning anyways.
Just a peek, he reasoned. Out of curiosity. You wouldn’t even realize they were missing, and if you did you’d chalk it up to the washing machine eating your clothes.
You’d show up to class on Tuesday and sit next to him while he’d be wearing your pretty lace panties and you’d be none the wiser.
Fuck, he was getting hard just thinking about it.
He dug in your laundry, sifting through mascara stained washcloths and an endless amount of oversized t-shirts, until he found what he’d been looking for.
Small, so tiny in fact that he wondered how your lips could fit in them. He groaned -the idea of your pussy hanging out of the material made his cock twitch, and brought the panties to his face, rubbing his nose all over the lace. He’d fantasized of burying his face between your legs all semester long, and this seemed close enough, the closest he could get to you anyways.
They seemed stretchy, and he hoped he could manage to stuff himself inside them.
“Didn’t peg you for a panty sniffer, Barnes.”
The world stilled around him, the ring in his ears so loud that he wondered if you could hear it too.
He was so engrossed in his creeping, that he hadn’t heard the door open and click shut, nor your steps as you walked behind him, or the slight groan that the washing machine behind him emitted when you settled on it, swinging your legs.
Slowly, he turned around, your lace panties still tightly clutched to his chest.
You almost chuckled at the sight of his bulging eyes and gaping mouth. Almost.
“That- it’s not- not how it looks like- I-”
“What, you were gonna fold my laundry for me? How considerate,” you sneered, but the look on your face was far from disgust.
Derision, sure, but not disgust. The mischievous interest in your eyes sent chills down his spine, not necessarily the good kind.
He felt dread settle in his stomach, anticipating whatever consequence his actions would have.
“You do this often?” you asked, tilting your head to the side, naked legs still swinging over the washing machine.
Bucky couldn’t find the words, and honestly the gall, to speak, so he just shook his head vehemently, shuffling on his feet.
“Hm, you like sniffing ‘em?”
He remained unmoving, too humiliated to do anything.
“Oh, I got it,” you beamed, pointing a finger at him and squinting your eyes, “You like touching yourself with pretty panties, hm? Like using them to fuck your dick, and cum all over ‘em?”
He wanted to answer, tell you to fuck off and sprint away to hide in his dorm for the rest of his life, but honestly he deserved this and so much worse. He almost considered dropping out of college entirely, but that glint in your eyes kept him anchored to the ground.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured, keeping his gaze on his white sneakers, “I-, I promise, I never done it before, I don’t know why-, look I won’t do it again, I swear,” he pleaded, tears pooling in his crystal eyes and threatening to stream down his face.
You cooed, honest to God coeed, a mocking pout on your lips.
You should have left, and reported him, but those pretty tears of his, the tremble in his voice, the stuttered pleas, only served to spur you on, a familiar warmth building up in your core.
“I bet if word got out of this, no one would want to hang around the resident creep anymore. Good luck getting girls then. Although, well, I don’t think you get too many under normal circumstances, do you?” you snorted, “That would be embarrassing, hm? Wouldn’t want that, would you?”
He found himself shaking his head, trying to swallow the lump in his throat to avoid giving you any more reason to mock him.
“It’s your lucky day then, because I have no intention to tell anyone,” you announced, stepping down to lean against the machine, arms crossed over your stomach.
“You- you don’t?” he wondered.
The notion should have elated him, but he felt himself growing more uneasy and confused with the smirk on your face.
“Won’t tell anyone if you don’t. Cross my heart,” you laughed, making a show of placing a hand on your chest.
He eyed you suspiciously. “Why?”
“Where’s the fun in that, Barnes? I wouldn’t enjoy bullying you if I’m not the only one doing it,” you chirped, “That doesn’t mean that my forgiveness should come for free, tho.”
His breath hitched, and you followed his Adam’s apple as it bobbed up and down his throat.
You could feel the control in your grasp, panties getting wetter with each one of his tears.
“I’ll do anything,” he swore, and you almost wished he’d fall on his knees and beg.
“Anything you say, huh?” you paused, “Strip,” you commanded, leaning back against the washing machine.
Bucky furrowed his brows and looked up in confusion, then disbelief, finally embarrassment. “Wh- what? But, but what if someone sees, I-”
“Then you better hurry.”
“But I-”
“You fuckin’ heard me the first time.”
He was startled into action, hands hastily pulling at his hoodie and jeans until he was standing in nothing but socks and underwear.
“I’m not gonna repeat myself again.”
He gulped visibly, and hesitated before hooking his fingers around the waistband of his boxers, pulling them down his legs.
He blushed harder, ducking his head.
His cock sprung out of his boxers, and the mouthwatering sight of it had you reconsidering Bucky Barnes and all your life choices during this semester.
He was glistening in pre cum, painfully hard and veiny, and definitely thick enough that fitting it inside your cunt would be hard work on both parts. You imagined taking him in your mouth, how you would definitely choke around his girth, and your jaw would be sore for days.
Not today, though. Bad boys did not get that kind of privilege.
You bit your lips, and Bucky fought the impulse to squirm under your intense gaze.
“Something wrong?” he rasped out, praying for the ground to open up and swallow him whole in case you found him too small, too crooked, too hairy.
You snorted, eyebrows raised skeptically. “Yeah, babe, the fact that I haven’t seen you naked before. You been hiding all this,” you eyed his crotch suggestively, “from me all this time?”
“T- thanks,” he stuttered, offering you a small smile, eyes trained on the ground. He tried to ignore the way his heart fluttered when you called him an endearing term, reminding himself that this was all a game to you, a game that he was more than willing to play if it ended up with his cock buried deep inside you.
You sighed then, pondering your thoughts. He was not your usual type, but he was cute in a nerdy way, shy and quiet, and he was packing more than any other man you’d had before.
Plus, this was way too entertaining for you to pass up.
“Wear ‘em.”
Bucky’s head snapped up at the command, but this time he did not hesitate to follow your instructions, a bit too eager as he slid the panties up his thighs.
The shutter of your phone’s camera brought him out of his thoughts, and his eyes widened in horror when he saw you take pictures of him. He trusted you wouldn’t spread them around, but the thrill of danger had him leak more pre cum, wetting a patch on the lace.
“So that’s your deal? You like wearing panties? Didn’t even try to act like you didn’t want to,” you snickered, “What a whore.”
The situation couldn’t get more humiliating, and he couldn’t get more desperate for you.
“Be a good boy, Bucky. Fold the laundry for me, since that’s clearly what you meant to do,” you laughed scornfully, nodding to the basket at your feet.
He walked to you slowly, bending over to pick it up, and yelped when you slapped his ass harshly, the sound bouncing off the walls and shooting straight to his aching cock.
“Cute. Now go, you got something to do and I don’t have all night.”
He sighed, and got to work, unloading each item from the dryer, and folding it neatly.
You eyed the lines of his back, the round globes of his ass, the string of your thong dipping between his cheeks. You almost lost yourself imagining how pretty he would look all scratched and marked before you furrowed your brows, observing the way he folded on of your nicer shirts that you wore on interviews and internships.
“Can’t even fold laundry, look at you,” you tsked, shaking your head, “Try that again, I don’t want to spend more than necessary ironing it.”
He obeyed, without any protest, smoothing the creases he’d created, and continuing with your load, until the dryer was empty and you were satisfied.
“Good job, baby boy,” you praised, beckoning him over.
He got closer, close enough that you could feel the heat emanating from his body. He looked so pretty like that, all teary and obedient.
You wanted to make him yours and ruin him for everybody else.
“You’re a fuckin’ pervert, you know that? A creep and a pervert.”
You saw the way his cock twitched behind your lace at the words, and almost doubled over in laughter.
The night couldn’t get any better.
“Fuck, you really are a pervert. This what you get off to? You imagine me calling you names, degrading you like the bitch you are? You want to be humiliated, don’t you?”
A desperate, pathetic whine escaped his throat, and he felt his knees growing weak with need. He was naked in a public space where everyone could see him, being belittled and humiliated by the girl he’d been pining over, and he was hard as a rock, getting off every word that spilled out of your mouth.
“Well,” you purred, fisting the hair at the back of his neck and tugging harshly, “I think we can arrange that.”
“Yes, yes, please, I want it,” he whimpered, chest heaving, “I want you, I’m your slut, I-, you can do whatever you want to me.”
You almost moaned then, intoxicated by his burning desire.
“Good boy,” you hummed, releasing his hair to stroke his cheekbone, smiling at the way he leaned his head against your palm, letting his eyes flutter shut.
“Remember you can tell me to stop or slow down whenever you want, and I will. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to,” you added more serious, observing his face for any trace of anything but enthusiasm.
When you found none, and he nodded feverishly, you let your hand fall from his cheek to his shoulder, tracing the outlines of his lean muscle.
“Can- can you kiss me, please?” he asked, and he begged so prettily that you could do nothing but humor him, crashing your lips against his.
It was messy, rough. He was sloppy, and from the way he moved against you, you guessed he didn’t have too much experience.
Better, you reasoned. You’d teach him all he needed to know to please you, and you only.
You bit on his bottom lip, and Bucky yelped in surprise, parting his lips.
He tasted like mint on your tongue, and you sighed in content, letting your hands travel down his sides, barely grazing his skin, scratching the hair on his belly.
He shuddered under your touch, goosebumps erupting in your wake.
When you reached his lower stomach, you felt him tense, his breathing getting harder, his tongue more insistent.
He was drooling and crying, you realized, as he snapped his hips against your leg, humping you like a dog.
You broke away from the kiss, catching your breath.
“Look at you, you gettin’ real worked up and I barely even touched you. What are you, a fuckin’ virgin?” you chuckled, playing with the little bow on the front of your panties.
You’d expected him to laugh, or deny, but he just stood there awkwardly, avoiding your gaze,
“I’m not,” he grumbled, avoiding your gaze.
“Then why are you acting like one?” you prodded, but didn’t wait for him to answer, claiming his mouth in a searing kiss.
His hesitant hands groped your breasts, finally gaining the confidence to do more than linger awkwardly on your hips. He twirled your stiff nipples, rubbing his thumbs over them, movements getting more frenzied the closer he got to his release.
He crouched awkwardly to be at your chest level while still pressing his hips onto you, and tugged your loose tank top down, moaning at the sight of your tits.
“Go on baby, suck on my tits.”
He didn’t need any more encouragement to assault your nipples, latching his mouth onto one of them, and suckling. You wondered if he’d ever even touched a pair of boobs before, but his ministrations were working either way, making your walls clamp down on nothing.
You finally grasped him in your hand, his cock heavy and throbbing in your palm as you stroked him lazily, spurred on by his little whimpers.
His whole body quivered when you ran your thumb over his slit, and you marvelled at his sensitivity.
“You like it when I touch you like this, baby?” you moaned in his ear, “I bet you do, I bet you could cum already just from this. Just a handjob, like the pathetic little boy you are, hm?”
He released your tits with a wet pop, and rose to full height again, resting his forehead on yours.
“Yes, yes, please,” he sobbed, “please, princess, more.”
You complied, doubling your efforts. He inhaled sharply when you added your other hand and began twisting both your wrists in opposite directions.
“You want your princess to suck your dick, baby? Want me to get on my knees and take you in my mouth?”
He nodded against you, grinding his hard cock against your hand, desperate to chase his release.
“Or maybe you want your princess’ pretty pussy? You want to fill me with your fat cock and stuff me full of your filthy cum, don’t you?”
He began blabbering, breathing harder, sloppily snapping his hips. He had a look of pure bliss on his face, his eyes shut tightly, mouth hung open and a layer of sweat coating his forehead.
You could feel him grow and throb in your hand, and just before he was about to reach his high, you stopped your hands.
His eyes shot open and he opened and closed his mouth to protest, but you gave him no time, fisting his hair and slamming him against the washer, bending him over the cold surface.
“What, you thought I’d catch you stealing my panties and I’d let that go?” you tutted, bending over him, pressing your front to his back, whispering in his ear “Bad boys need to be punished, don’t you agree?”
A choking sound escaped his parted lips, and you giggled against his skin, licking a strip behind his neck.
You let your hands wander down the expanse of his back, settling on the waistband of your panties. You indulged yourself again, slapping his ass because you liked how it jiggled and how Bucky whined.
“You have a nice ass, you know,” you mused, slouching back to get a good vision of it, “You ever had anyone stick anything up there?”
“W-what?” he sputtered, crooning his head to look at you, “N-no, never.”
“Cute.”
He squirmed in embarrassment when you spread his cheeks, groaning when he felt your spit drip down on him. You massaged a finger around his rim, your hand coated in your spit and his pre cum.
“Relax, I’ll make you feel really good, promise.”
You gradually felt his muscles relax under your touch as you soothingly ran a hand down his back and kept whispering calming, sweet nothings in his ear.
Then, you dipped a finger past the rim.
“See, not that bad, huh?” you smiled, working your finger inside him, caressing his walls.
You nipped the skin of his back, peppering his muscles with fluttering kisses, grazing your teeth over his column.
You dipped another in, and Bucky hissed, wiggling his legs.
“Hey, it’s okay,” you shushed him, “You’re doing so good for me, baby.”
He preened under your praise, and you began scissoring your fingers inside his ass, working him open and looking for the spot you knew would make him beg for more.
The heat between your legs was almost unbearable, your pussy desperate to be stuffed full of his cock.
You loved how pliant Bucky was being, obedient and submissive in your grasp. You noticed the tears that hadn’t stopped streaming down his face, and huffed a laugh.
“A pervert, a slut, and a fuckin’ crybaby, aren’t you?” you mumbled, a genuine smile tugging at your lips.
“Fuck, oh fuck, fuck, fuck,” he chanted, holding onto the washing machine for dear life, tongue lolling out of his mouth, drool dripping down his chin, making it known that you’d found what you’d been looking for.
“Yes, fuck, please princess, gimme more,” he begged, overwhelmed with a pleasure like he’d never experienced before.
He felt like a fire had been lit in his lower belly, and it was spreading to every limb, encompassing him whole.
You grasped his cock in one of your hands while your fingers kept pummeling into his ass, feeling the rim clench around you and his cock pulsate.
You thought you could cum from his beautiful sounds alone, and you kept going until you were sure he was on the verge of a mind shattering orgasm.
Then, you stopped again, and this time Bucky sobbed, blabbering and wailing, begging you.
“Please princess, I’ll do anything, just please let me cum, please, please,” he continued, shamelessly bucking his hips against nothing.
You released his cock and pulled your fingers out of his ass, cleaning the fluids against his panties.
“You’re so fuckin’ pathetic, begging like that,” you mocked him, retrieving your phone from the pocket of your shorts.
You snapped a couple of photos of him bent over the washing machine, pent up and debauched. His balls hung from the lace of your panties, and you made sure to zero on his tear stained face.
“So pretty, my pretty crybaby,” you cooed, helping him stand up again.
He fell on his knees, clutching the hem of your t-shirt.
“Please, you can’t leave me like this, I-, please,” he blabbered.
You committed the image to memory, knowing you’d see it again soon.
You could see it in his eyes how hooked he was to you.
“Baby, bad boys don’t get to cum, do they? You can’t go around stealing people’s laundry,” you tutted, lightly slapping his cheek, “You deserve some punishment, don’t you agree?”
He hesitantly nodded, slumping down on his shins. You grasped his chin, tilting his head up to meet his gaze.
“You got to bed now, no touching, and I’ll see you tomorrow. I’ll know if you disobeyed, and trust me, you don’t want to know what’s gonna happen if you did.”
You smiled, and took a few steps back to retrieve your basket, leaving him to catch his breath on the floor.
“See you tomorrow at 4 pm, you know where my dorm is,” you chirped despite your own neglected arousal, sauntering to the door, “Get dressed before someone comes in, you wouldn’t want to see how much of a pervert you are, right?”
He shook his head, agreeing with you despite the sobs that silently shook through his body.
“Good boy,” you purred, hand twisting the knob. You paused, and threw him a look over yourself, “Oh, and thank you for the laundry.”
-
I hope you liked this! Please leave some feedback if you can! ❤️
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x you
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Re: the post u reblogged about couples actually enjoying spending time with each other/having in-jokes & whatnot. What would u do w that for John/Chas 👀👀
UGH anon i can't believe i didn't answer this very important question before, and esp bc i think maybe you were hoping for a full fic and not just. this random assortment of headcanons, but, obviously i have thots:
one of my fav John & Chas comics canon scene is when they goof on some rando at a bar bc he looks like a character from spinal tap, from which i infer: they probably watched it together, or else must've discussed it (w nostalgia given their own ~touring days) enough that john knows chas'll get the reference. HENCE i have inferred that they have at least somewhat similar tastes in pop culture and i assume that holds true across canons.
comics!john is also someone who canonically referenced dr who, star trek, and star wars, ergo, a BIT of a (sci-fi) nerd, which you wouldn't expect looking at him HOWEVER. chas knows 👀 and probably teases him about. not that chas is like. COOL but i see him as having idk more basic tastes. Airport fiction, etc. Stuff he can consume on his (minimal) downtime as a cabbie/dad/chauffeur/bodyguard/personal chef.
BUT anyway, obviously, i think they watch enough movies & TV together (or separately, but have similar enough tastes) that they have the same reference bank so in show canon i assume it’s like, john makes a lot of random snarky asides, chas laughs at it, and zed has no idea what they’re laughing about and after the first few times she asks, decides she really doesn’t want to.
additionally, show canon is, when john is in town, they go to bars & music shows together (or i guess at least bars where live music is played? but either way john keeps him out ALL NIGHT and renee obviously hates it).
I think John maybe sometimes forgets that Chas isn't 100% aligned w him on stuff? I just recall TV john having that rambly convo w the bartender at the end of the [aired] pilot where hes talking about the sex pistols vs the ramones & then chas shows up [looking like an absolute DILF in his three layers of clothing in ATLANTA of all places] and im not sure if this actually happened but i can just picture john like, trying to rope chas into that discussion & chas being like, 🙄.
Another john/chas friendship is just based on its longevity. chas has obvs known him a long time & remembers john in his "cutting up his t shirts & safety pining them back together " baby punk disaster stage, and/or his "frontman in a truly terrible band" thing, so even when john is being all broody (esp when john is being all broody) and/or the worst, chas can't completely divorce that from skinny, messy, but in some ways probably happier or at least less traumatized teenaged/early 20s y/o john.
Relatedly, comics!chas has nothing but disdain for Mucous Membrane, despite being their roadie. (i’m assuming he took the job bc he thought it would get him girls tbh.) And he's not afraid to mention it to john, even when john HAS not asked. Just full on roasts him about it, and john takes it so personally! A DELIGHT. any area where chas has a SLIGHT upper hand on john & relentlessly exploits it really just balances them and thus i’m always a fan.
theres a bit in show canon (I'm p sure it was in the New Orleans ep?) where john, chas, & zed are in the car & have to go talk to the police about something, and john starts throwing out different backstories they can use w the implication that they're the ones he & chas have used in the past, and chas is just like nodding along, and idk it's a small moment but it speaks to the fact that post-fire & pre-zed, john & chas DID engage in at least some spooky shit shenanigans, just the two of them. or maybe their ~bits go back to the MM days, or when they were even younger & john was out there just conning people out of things? Either way, EXCELLENT friendship history vibes.
(I actually just had kind of a sad thought which is, the fun hanging out & drinking in dive bars while listening to local bands stuff was a pre-fire/arthurian spell thing, bc after that chas may have mostly been hanging out w john bc they were doing ~spooky shit stuff)
also i’ve said it before but show!john & chas GO GROCERY SHOPPING TOGETHER IN THE PILOT and we DON’T get to see it and it’s NEVER referenced again and this is BIPHOBIA even more so than the fact the camera drifts when john kisses him in the bar
#chastantine#sorry anon this is a mess of disjointed & somewhat repetitive thots#i'd much. rather have written a fic about it but i'm still having trouble w writing so alas#john constantine#john constantine kissing dudes 2k14#chas chandler#he's a bear. and he's a daddy. he's a daddy bear
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Kyoya Ootori||SFW Alphabet
A/N: Here’s Kyoya 4 more to go!
Word Count: 1753
A: Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)
Kyoya shows affection very subtly. Honestly you might feel like you’re stuck in a Victorian novel especially at the beginning of your relationship. He’ll brush his hand along the back of yours and then smile at you like oh that was intentional, ok. He’s really trying his best, but he’s not very obvious with his affection, all of his love tends to be conveyed through words and actions of caring.
B: Best Friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)
As a best friend, Kyoya is lowkey a gossip. He’s not going to tell everyone what information he has but if you come up to him complaining about how so and so was bothering you, he’s already got a journal full of secrets and he’s ready to ruin someone’s career.
C: Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)
Kyoya likes to cuddle but he prefers to be the big spoon, this is solely because he doesn’t want to be woken up early just because you had to go to the bathroom or something. He only cuddles during night time and if you do wake up before him, he’s pretty easily fooled if you just replace your body with a pillow.
D: Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)
He definitely wants to settle own, not just because of his family and him feeling like he’s obligated to settle down, but also just because he’s a traditional person in the sense that he wants to marry the person he fell in love with. As for domestic skills, Kyoya can’t cook or clean for SHIT. The only skill he’s got is probably managing finances and things along those lines but if you asked him to cook, he’d somehow find a way to burn water, just a bad time for everyone involved.
E: Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)
If Kyoya doesn’t break up with you via text message (or letter if he’s feeling fancy), he honestly probably just tells you upfront that he doesn’t view your relationship as something he has a vested interest in continuing. Ouch.
F: Fiance(e) (How would they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)
Commitment for Kyoya has always ben somewhat of an obligation. He feels like he has to propose to you if you’re relationship is becoming serious. He’ll discuss it with you of course, but the man is very committed to those he loves and what better way to show that than marriage?
G: Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)
Not very physically gentle, again, he’s just not very physically affectionate. When he does initiate physical affection with you it’s always with a measure of unsureness and caution. Emotionally, he’s a bit more gentle. Kyoya looks for the type of person who can keep up with him especially intellectually, with him it’s like no words are needed, you both just get it.
H: Hugs( Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)
Kyoya’s hugs kinda suck. He doesn’t give them often, let alone initiate them, and if you hug him, he’ll just stand there kinda surprised and at a loss for what to do. At least he’s nice to hug, he’s got this cologne that smells like a warm fireplace during a winter storm that smells so comforting.
I: I love you (How fast do they say the L-word)
You definitely say ‘I love you’ before Kyoya. He expresses his love through tender gazes and lovesick smiles so he definitely assumes you get the message. However, if you express to Kyoya that you’d like to hear him say that he loves you, he’ll oblige.
J: Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous)
Kyoya doesn’t really get jealous, it’s not a matter of arrogance, more like, he knows that you’re with him and he’s with you. He doesn’t act out either on the off chance that he does get jealous because he was raised to bottle things up. In fact, the most Kyoya’s ever been jealous was in the beginning of your relationship/before you were dating where he was sure someone was gonna come by and sweep you away.
K: Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)
The way Kyoya kisses is by cradling your face and just kinda going for it. He prefers to kiss you on the lips but he doesn’t mind placing them elsewhere if things get more intimate.
L: Little ones (How are they around children)
Kyoya kind of sucks around children. He’s not rude to them or anything of that sort but he just doesn’t find himself having anything in common with them and doesn’t really care for the topics they find interesting.
M: Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)
Mornings with Kyoya depend on if he’s off or not. If he has work or an early morning obligation of some sort, you’ll probably have to wake him up. He sets alarms but he’ll just swat at his alarm and then go back to bed, can’t exactly do that with your s/o now can you? However, if he has the day off or doesn’t have to wake up early, he won’t let you leave the bed until he’s ready to wake up. He’s surprisingly hard to move when he’s dead asleep like that.
N: Night (How are nights spent with them?)
Nights with Kyoya, he tends to stay up late and then just pass out on the nearest surface. If you happen to be awake long enough or pass him on the way to the kitchen/bathroom/etc., please move him into your bed. He will complain about his back problems if you don’t, if you can’t move him (which fair tbh he does deadweight) please give him a blanket and pillow, when he wakes up, it means the world to him.
O: Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)
Kyoya reveals things very gradually to you over time, he’s a very layered person and while certain aspects of his true personality may bubble up, you’re gonna have to put the full picture together on your own. Unless you’re like Tamaki and can just see through all his bs.
P: Patience (How easily angered are they?)
Kyoya is actually pretty easy to anger. This is because of his no nonsense attitude as well as his general grumpiness with the world. Although, no anger can top Kyoya’s anger from being woken up early.
Q: Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)
Kyoya remembers every detail you’re willing to share with him. He writes most of it in his notebook but somethings he likes to keep to himself and surprise you with later on.
R: Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)
His favorite moment in your relationship was when you suggested your next date be at a flower viewing. Kyoya initially thought it might just be like a boring “commoner” thing to do but as the date went on, he ended up really enjoying himself. The sight of you surrounded by flowers was also a plus
S: Security (How protective are they? How would they like to be protected?)
Kyoya’s family has essentially a private police force, in addition he also has personal guards, best believe, you are protected. Don’t even worry about trying to protect him either, he has people on payroll for that
T: Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
Kyoya puts a lot of effort into dates, anniversaries, and gifts. The man always knows when there’s a special occasion coming up and has already planned for every step of the day. As for dates in general, he likes to spoil you. He has absolutely no problem with flying you to somewhere like Okinawa for example, just because
U: Ugly (What are some bad habits of theirs? (I’m gonna add arguments here because they aren’t on the prompt list I found))
A bad habit Kyoya has is that he tends to try and test people and their limits with no prompting. He’s very secretive in general so that plus his sudden decisions to test people can lead to some bad arguments. The worst argument you’ve gotten into to date is when he suddenly started flirting back with his guests during the regular day and you got jealous and snapped.
V: Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)
Kyoya is concerned with his looks in the sense that he has a reputation to uphold. He’s not arrogant by any means but he does take pride in looking good. Plus Tamaki recommended a skin care routine to him once and now he’s hooked
W: Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)
He views you as his better, he doesn’t feel incomplete without you but he can feel himself turning back into his sort of middle school self pre-Tamaki when you aren’t around.
X: (E)xes (Any previous relationship experience. How does that factor into your current relationship?)
He has no previous relationship experience. He has experience flirting of course and he’s had crushes before but he’s new to this, please be gentle.
Y: Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner)
Kyoya doesn’t like people with forceful personalities. He tolerates it for the sake of being polite and his image if nothing else but this man cannot stand when people are pushy and always have to get their way. He also hates boring people.
Z: Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)
Canonically Kyoya is a heavy sleeper, this can be kind of an issue at times. He’s a hard worker who stays up late on things he’s passionate about which means he might fall asleep on whatever’s closest. There’s been more than one occasion where you’ve walked over to him sound asleep on his laptop with a document covered in keysmash from where he slumped on the computer.
#sfw alphabet#kyoya ootori x reader#kyoya headcanon#ohshc imagines#ohshc x reader#ohshc kyoya x reader#x black reader#idontblushsrry
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ladrien fic recs!
there are SO MANY amazing ladrien fics i cant possibly cover them all but here are a few!
(all the ratings used are ao3 ratings)
((this is a very long post!))
FLUFF
Of Ivy and Sunlight by cyanise [ T, 1509 words, 1/1 ]
When Adrien takes to wandering the streets of Paris in ungodly hours, Ladybug has no choice but to keep an eye on him. Still, things are bound to get a little out of hand between two overloaded teenagers with a lot of love and not enough self-control.
a lovely post-chat blanc fic :’) it has a great flow and is just soft and so sweet and it’s just perfect. gosh i cannot really say more other than read it!!! also almost all of their other stuff is also ladrien so do check it out!
This can't be happening by PlaPla [ T, 6,467 words, 1/2 ]
Ladybug is unsure whether accompanying Adrien to a gala as his not-date is the best or worst thing that has ever happened to her. But when their table mates turn out to be none other than her long time friends Alya and Nino and with Adrien acting weirder and weirder she finds herself with bigger worries than an unrequited crush.
a djwifi/ladrien double date? hit me up! i love identity shenanigans, ball dancing, ladrien, and djwifi and this is a perfect mix for me. i know it’s incomplete but it doesn’t end in a cliff-hanger really, the part 2 is just a promise of more so it doesn’t feel incomplete! PlaPla also has a short oneshot of ladrien going for a motorcycle ride.
Falling again by emsylcatac [ M, 4,506 words, 2 Works ]
They had been dancing around each other for a while now, and while fifteen year old Adrien would have been ecstatic at the idea of dating Ladybug in secret, twenty-two year old Adrien knew better. But Ladybug wasn’t making it easy. It was like… she, too, was falling for him. And that surprisingly enough, she didn’t mind.
* * *
Or Adrien trying (and failing) to keep things professional between him and Ladybug when the two of them partner up for a mission. Older AU
things are a little steamy~ here (don’t worry, it’s only implied it’s very mild and closer to a T rating than the M) but it’s a great mature take on their dynamics! emsy has more ladrien one-shots in her collection of one-shots!
i'd love to go on a date with you by sae_what [ G, 6,480 words, 1/1 ]
Once it had been falsely announced throughout Paris that Adrien and Ladybug are in a relationship, Ladybug pays him a visit to turn him down gently.
Only, she doesn’t. And instead, she has a formal dinner date. With Adrien. At 8 pm. Tonight.
LADYBUG IN A SUIT!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaa. okay but for real it’s so sweet and also??? they are on a date!!! a rooftop date!! (too man exclamation marks oops)
Always Welcome by chatonne-rousse [ T, 1,683 words, 1/1 ]
Ladybug knows that Adrien's window is always open for her to swing by and stop in, whether for video games or a chat or, like tonight, for soft kisses and sweet nothings.
He loves these visits. His girlfriend is always welcome. Always. (Especially for kisses.)
Written for Ladrien June, day 8: bluebell eyes.
established relationship, pre-reveal ladrien. there is something very home-y about this fic and it’s all about the comfort and quiet that i adore about it!
Five Times Gabriel Agreste Caught Ladybug in His Son’s Bedroom (and the One Time He Caught Chat Noir) by agrestenoir [ T, 1,923 words, 1/1]
Gabriel Agreste keeps finding Ladybug in his son's bedroom. As a super villain and father, this will not stand.
this crack fic is... honestly so hilarious. it’s all through gabrie-i-am-trying-to-parent-and-failing-a-lot-agreste’s POV so it is so much ridiculous!
an uncurtain discovery by Missnoodles [ T, 4,684 words, 1/1 ]
When he returns from school on Wednesday afternoon, Adrien discovers the darkness in his own home. He struggles to come to terms with it. To his utter mortification and delight, Ladybug is nearby to rescue him.
(He does not discover that his father is supervillain. That will happen on a different Wednesday.)
Adrien is being a cat and gets tangled in the curtains on his window and it’s utterly ridiculous. all the bug and the cat tendencies make it funnier and adrien’s inner monologue is just a cherry on top!
secret valentine by a_miiraculer [ T, 12,245 words, 1/1 ]
this is the moment that we will come alive brace yourself for love sweet love, secret love
If Adrien had known that getting himself stuck in a tree would end like this, he would've gotten himself stuck sooner.
A drabble series.
i just,,,, don’t have words for how much i love it! it’s ridiculous, it’s cute, it’s funny, it’s whole-some and just ladrien. the writer also has a M rated multi-chapter ladrien kissing (no the M is very much real here) and a heroic adrien and ladybug one-shot too!
Those Benevolent Stars by peachcitt [ G, 23,696 words, 3/3 ]
“Will you come back?”
She looked up at the deep blue sky, as if she could somehow find the answer there. “I shouldn’t,” she said, shaking her head and looking back at him. But the stars were still there, caught in her eyes, and Adrien persisted.
“But will you?”
or
adrien meets his soulmate, a thief who calls herself ladybug. he falls for her, but she seems determined to maintain a space between them.
oh my god this au.... just no words!! it’s poetry and it’s tender and it’s about the yearning and just!!! perfect :’). Her current ongoing ladrien june fic is also akin to this (and the fic i linked before it) so do check it out too! (literally check out all of their works it’s so beautiful)
Flowers on the Window Sill by LNC [ G, 2,144 words, 1/1 ]
The first time Ladybug saw him, really saw him, the universe stopped.
this fic feels like poetry and it’s so lovely. LNC is always short and direct but it always hits right in the feels while also being hilarious. Her other ladrien works are just as good and i highly recommend going through them because it fulfills all of the ladrien needs (along with Reiaji)
whatever a sun will always sing is you by komorebirei [ T, 32,980 words, 37/37 ]
“I didn't think you'd actually... do anything," Adrien admitted, cheeks prickling with warmth. "I-I mean, I never expected... I didn't know you watched my interviews.” That definitely wasn’t how he'd imagined confessing to Ladybug.
“Of course I do!” Ladybug squeaked. “Uhh, that is…” She looked down at her hands, nervously turning her yo-yo over, over and over. “Maybe you’re not the only one with a crush.”
(After an unexpected confession, Ladybug and Adrien start dating in secret. A progressive character- and relationship-study quilted from drabbles, with the intention of digging treasure out of the cove that is Ladrien. Written using kashimalin-fanfiction's kiss writing prompts from Tumblr.)
it does such an excellent job at exploring this dynamic along with the characters. it’s such a sweet fic, each chapter short and fun!
ANGST
whose woods these are (I think I know.) by Reiaji [ T, 105,000 words, 25/25 ]
Four years after his future turns to cinders, Adrien is a servant in the house he was meant to inherit. Disowned by his father and abused by his stepmother, his days are filled with drudgery until he meets a masked huntress in the forest behind his father's chateau.
As his friendship with Ladybug turns to first love, he dreams of a future spent at her side.
Then, on the eve of the Princess's masquerade, he meets his guardian—and is granted a wish.
[Ladrien Cinderella AU]
Warnings: Child abuse, Graphic depiction of violence
this is absolutely gorgeous. it has so many troupes and so many amazing character arc and great build up and everything just flows so well. it left me in awe for weeks and i just. want to experience reading it for the first time again. look at this gorgeous art inspired by this! {and you have to read leonard bernstein too because LETTERS and LADRIEN and YEARNING}
i would do it again (oh, a thousand times) by bugabisous [ T, 2,266 words, 1/1 ]
Knowing you can bring someone back doesn’t mean you’re free of the pain of seeing them disappear before your eyes. He can’t imagine he’ll be able to look at her directly without replaying every horrifying moment when he felt her slip away in a puff of smoke.
When it happens once again, he already knows he’ll be trying again. He just can’t give up.
it expands on adrien’s feelings in the episode desperada (my beloved <3) and it is just ouch. such great angst, such great potential. the kind of tragedy that it offers is unusual for ml (it gets only rivaled by chat blanc tbh). to rival this angst bugabisous also has a fluffy one-shot :)
when the world gets too heavy (put it on my back) by Taliax [ T, 4,720 words, 1/1 ]
Chat Noir isn't allowed to cry over his father. But even when he's just Adrien, Ladybug won't abandon him.
Hawkmoth reveal hurt/comfort + Ladrien
the plagg and adrien bond written is just perfect, and oh this hits right in the feels :’) it hurts all in the right way. tali also has so many other ladrien works in all genres too
By Your Side by omniousunflower [ T, 4,361 words, 1/1 ]
(Angry and alone, Adrien waits on top of the Eiffel Tower for his lady.)
“So, how did my kitty get stranded up here?” Ladybug asks.
Groaning, Adrien pulls his knees toward his chest and presses his face against them. “Because he’s stupid and impulsive.”
“Chasing pigeons, then?”
“No.” Shame burns in Adrien’s veins, white-hot now that Ladybug is here to witness his stupidity. “I threw my Miraculous, and Plagg wouldn’t get it for me.”
post-hawkmoth defeat, and adrien is not doing well at all. i am cheating because it is post reveal, pre relationship but it’s still ladrien. this fic is a roller coater of emotions, starting from a slightly crack scenario to a cute, awkward, hopeful ending. More Than You Know is another of sunny’s angsty ladrien work!
Breaking The Rules (AKA The Ladrien Fistfight) by ThisKwamiNeeds_aNap [ T, 8,714 words, 1/1 ]
Marinette may or may not be dying, but she’s still going to do her best to fix every single problem in the world. She’s not expecting Adrien to be the one who tries to stop her. (Takes place immediately after Kwami Buster)
Warnings: panic attack, broken bones, PTSD. please read the tags!
*slaps this fic* this fic can fit in so much angst. it just?? left me in PAIN oof. it says ‘ladrien fistfight’ on the lid but nooo there is marinette is just having a freak out and it’s all so much??!! and it’s not just marinette there is adrien too and chloe and alya and- wow it’s amazing. love it so much it fills up my angst needs :’)
so that’s it for now! my personal commentary isn’t impressive nor does it do justice to the fic but i still hope you read a few of these!! happy reading!!
#ladren#fic rec#ml fic rec#miraculous ladybug#i know i dont do the fics justice but. oh well#lovesquare#ladrien#obviously check out the writers other workd too but this is ladrien so i am trying to give it a bit more emphasis#also i am so sorry i couldnt include more lesser known writers but unfortunatley they dont have ladrien uRGH anyway maybe sometime later!#i spend a lot of time on thi n got lazy so plz be considerate#also add recs if u want even self-promo is cool duh
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