#and there are plenty of others that i can't think of rn

[yoonyeon0]

Suup gorgeous

Could you write headcanons on how kengan men would act when drunk

Maybe including gaolang and saw paing

🫠🫠

are we flirting rn 🤭/hj also I LOVVE your drawings, i could eat them omg they're so hot ( ˶ˆᗜˆ˵ )

𓂃۶ৎ WASTED! | kengan hcs pt. 3

જ⁀➴ WITH: lihito, meguro, mikazuchi, muteba, okubo, sawada, sekibayashi, ohms, takayama, shen, wakatsuki, saw paing

જ⁀➴ SUMMARY: the kengan men had a bit too much to drink - how do they act?

જ⁀➴ WARNINGS:

LONG AF, suggestive, mentions of alcohol, kengan men under the influence, very ooc, mentions of memory loss, mentions of puke/throwing up, hangover mentions, parties, kinda she/they pronouns being used, cussing, ect.

જ⁀➴ AUTHOR'S NOTES: this was supposed to be in two more parts but i am not finding anymore dividers so this was all mangled in one part, anyway happy new years!

𓂃۶ৎ LIHITO

well this is alr established in the anime and manga but this man has literally nothing holding him back.

and its worse when he's with okubo too

def slurs all of his words and genuinely doesn't make coherent words

only okubo can understand him

has NO self respect when he's drunk btw

"LIHITO! WHAT THE- WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!"

you watched in horror as the man you surprisingly acquainted yourself with was stripping slowly in the middle of the party you two were attending at mr. yamashita's office. so he wasn't saying anything but knowing him for as long as you have, he was definitely already in lala land. you were about to stop him yourself to spare everyone from a tantalizing sight before someone cut you to it.

"bro. you're gonna scare all the ladies away! can't you find somewhere else to finish what ever.....this is?"

you slowly tilted your head to see an obviously irritated himuro ryo scolding lihito on his recklessness. you turned your head even more to look at lihitos reaction to only see a confused expression which shocked you.

"huuuuuuuuh? wadoyamean? moveouttathewaywillya?! igortaclimbthatthinglikerighnoo!"

as if it was on cue, the two of your faces scrunched up in an emotion that could only be explained as disturbed. was this guy seriously trying to speak any language? besides that, why the hell was he currently pointing at the walls of poor mr. yamashita's office?

"the hell are you saying? hey, your way too drunk to be here anymore dude. go home will you?"

you decided to leave the two men bicker among themselves. there was plenty of hot food and frunk sprawled on the table you had walked to. you had seen a guy with his hair buzzed standing in front of said table so you decided to make small talk hoping to make a friend.

the man, whos name you learned to be okubo, was drinking a lot as well and you were scared for both his health and his mental health. okubo was pressuring you to drink as well so that you both would end up drunk together.

as you took a drink that obviously had alcohol in it, you were so close to taking a sip before hearing the shouts of most males there, most of them being 'what the hell are you doing' and more.

when you decided to look up you not only saw lihito on the ceiling, he had no clothes on either.

what the hell.

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𓂃۶ৎ MEGURO

i can't see him drinking.

let alone drinking - I can't see him holding a cup.

but I digress

hallucinations everywhere in his mind

literally talks to himself and swears it's his dad

also says things that are so random

but he does that anyway

"hey dad, your judo was amazing y'know? but ive met guys even stronger than you - do you think i could beat them?"

you were not even the slightest bit phased as the man in front of kept talking to air - or other known as his 'dad'. this happened many times before when the man had somehow drank even when you forbade him to due to his incredible hallucinating skills.

you were currently in the kitchen making some tea with some tylenol on the side so that the man could take quickly.

"hey megs! are you done talking to your dad yet?"

at the sound of your chripy voice, the man slowly tilted his head in your direction with his tongue still hanging out of his mouth before getting on his legs to slowly waddle to your side in the kitchen. he didn't say anything, but he continued to stare at you with his large eyes.

"your so attractive."

you looked at him, scanning his face for any emotion or sign of him trying to get a reaction out of you but all you saw was sincerity.

"thank you megs, now take your medicine okay?" you said with a gleeful sigh.

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𓂃۶ৎ MIKAZUCHI

will AT MOST take a shot of whiskey. anymore is an ABSOLUTE NO.

i can't see him getting drunk because once again - he's probably too responsible to do that

but if he did get drunk

so clingy

I know he alr is without being drunk but imagine that clingy-ness x2

won't even LOOK anywhere that isn't your face.

being absolutely tackled by your boyfriend as soon as you picked him up from the bar was an understatement. you expected today to be a good day - calmly boring one.

but obviously not.

you were currently trying to convince your boyfriend to get the hell off of you but he stayed persistent. so there you were with a big mass of boyfriend suffocating you with his body weight alone on your shared bed.

"babe please-"

you were shut up with a finger on your lips.

"do you not want my love anymore? i thought we were solemates.."

the look he gave you was one you had never seen before. he was..pouting at you?

"well of course we are, it's just that i don't want a professional fighter to be laying on my body right now."

"am I hurting you?"

"well no but-"

"so why can't i be on you?"

"because it's uncomfortable as hell."

mikazuchi's pouting face slowly chilled down as he rolled over to your side while pulling you closer to him.

"okay, we can sleep like this then."

you rolled your eyes but you didnt protest because you knew that this was the best you were gonna get so you decided to drift into sleep in your loving boyfriend's arms.

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𓂃۶ৎ MUTEBA

life of the party or however that saying goes

PLEASE bring hin to any party your hosting bc when this guy is drunk he can lit a party tf up

he kinda seems like he would be the one pushing everyone to have a drink

also he is most definitely either hitting on or sleeping with all the woman at that party

"cmon dear, have drink with me!"

"im not having a drink with a complete rando so go find another person to sleep with."

the hunk of man seemed absolutely baffled by your denial of his request. he had full heartedly believed that any person who he wanted would be his but that delusion was shut down almost immediately.

but unfortunately for you, this man wasn't going down so easily.

"who said I wanted to sleep with you? is it forbidden to have a drink with someone your interested in?"

"it's more like I don't trust you at all because a man who somehow made this whole party alive again is someone that I should fear. you get what I'm saying?"

the man furrowed his brows. although he couldn't see your face due to his inability to see, he could tell that you were talking with a sense of humor in your voice. what about this was funny?

"hmm, i guess you do have a point. then, if i may, how could i convince you to share your time with me?"

"how about you work for me?"

"...work?"

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𓂃۶ৎ OKUBO

lihitos partner in crime

basically just lihito but a little more reserved

only a little bit

"oh my goodness."

as if looking for verification, you pointed up at lihito, who was currently both naked and on the ceiling to get the attention of the friend you had made earlier. little did you know, that was NOT a friend you should gone to for any reason.

as he looked up, he started to burst out laughing. you were not amused at all because everyone there was being consistently flashed by the man on the ceiling. as you were trying to calm him down, he suddenly began to start stripping at well before cheering lihito on.

so now there was two naked men, one of them hovering above everyone in the office and the other cheering. obviously, the one cheering was somewhat tackled down to the floor before being forced to put some clothes back on.

aborting your previous mission, you decided to try and find someone that knew these two so that they could be taken home. as you were looking around, you had found two men, one of them being himuro himself, who didn't seem the slightest bit phased on the disturbance happening. in matter of fact, they seemed somewhat expecting of all of this stuff to happen. the man standing next to himuro was a bit shorter and had a bob while wearing some type of traditional japanese attire.

as you approached the duo, the commotion seemed to had gotten louder and louder so you turned around to see an even more bizarre sight.

all the other drunk men had also stripped so there was a ball of naked men dancing and laughing.

what the hell.

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𓂃۶ৎ SAWADA

well my girlboss is obviously gonna slay while drunk.

he might just turn the bar table into a runway and start dancing

idk he just slays when he's drunk! he's just like that yknow?

"you sure you don't wanna dance with someone as talented as me?"

"sawada you know i would love too but i can't dance to save my life."

the man in front of you raised an eyebrow and scoffed, as if he already knew that.

"well im aware of that but i don't care! do you want to dance or not?"

"will you teach me if i say yes?"

"i.."

the man paused before continuing on, thinking about what he should say.

you sighed before giving him the best puppy eyes you could, pleading so that he would teach you at least one dance move that you could continously spam.

"ugh fine! you better match my moves well or ill never teach you again!"

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𓂃۶ৎ SEKIBAYASHI

10/10 actor here

pretends that the alcohol doesn't do anything to him but as soon as he's behind closed doors he collapses

literally is sweating bullets a stumbles and when someone asks if he's okay he responds so confidently

"IM FINE!" while his legs are threatening to let go 😭

"CHUG, CHUG, CHUG!"

a loud slam on the table from sekibayashi's big jar of beer was heard around the bar.

"COME ON! ALL OF YOU ASLEEP OR SOMETHING? BRING ME A TRUE CHALLENGE, OKAY?"

you watched seki with no emotion. the act he was putting on was kinda pitying to look at and you almost wanted to laugh at how desperately he was trying to put the tough guy act on. surprisingly enough, he had no more opponents. it seemed like everyone there had gotten the memo that none of them were gonna be able to out drink THE sekibayashi.

as seki was slowly walking down from his bar stool and up to you, he seemed to be looking around with a scowl on his face.

"damn, all of them pussied out! i was hoping to find a real man here!"

"yeah im glad that didn't happen. your legs are shaking, see?"

you pointed your hand to the legs of the man in front of you who didn't even notice how much his legs were shaking currently.

"hey! th-thats just because i have been standing for a while!"

"you were sitting but okay. let's go already, the smell in here is suffocating."

you lead seki to the car, you obviously getting into the drivers seat. as soon as you were seated, you looked at the passenger seat to see sekibayashi completely passed out. you chuckled lightly under your breath.

"what a dumbass."

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𓂃۶ৎ OHMA

forgets everything

as soon as the alcohol gets in his system he forgets everything; including you

lowkey funny though because he doesn't know anyone anymore

might slur his words but it is rare

his face gets red but in a blush typa way

"hey, who the hell are you?"

you were taken aback. who the hell were you? your girlfriend, soon-to-be wife!

"hah, funny. now you need leave that alcohol alone before you get even drunker."

you put your hand on his shoulder before he shrugged it off before giving you a stank face.

"don't touch me, i have a wife."

"yeah? im your wife idiot."

"you wish, my wife is both boautiful and amazing all in one person."

your eyebrows rose and your lips shifted into a smug smirk as you realized what was happening. somehow someway, your boyfriend had lost his memory from being drunk.

and of course you weren't gonna pass up this opportunity to see how he truly felt about you.

"hmm, you don't say? but your wife must be weak - i mean, look at you!"

he looked at you, obviously trying to give his most serious face but failing miserably with red coating his face.

"if she was here, she'd kick your ass."

"really? how do you know that?"

"i don't date, let alone marry, weak people."

you smiled, feeling content with your boyfriends responses before dismissing yourself from the conversation. of course you didn't actually leave, you just turned around the corner to the bathroom to turn right back around back out into the bar. and to no surprise, your boyfriend had seen you and called you over.

yeah, you'd be taking him out more after this.

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𓂃۶ৎ TAKAYAMA

gets flustered very easily and face gets red when he's drunk

prefers not getting drunk because of the fact he's a whole BODYGUARD

but sometimes one drink comes after the other and keeps going.

"hey, what's on your mind? you've been drinking like a mad man and you dragged me here too."

you looked at your fiancé in worry as he kept downing drink after drink. obviously, he was stressing out about something but what? you put you hand on his shoulder while he was in the middle of his 4th drink. he looked at you in surprise before slowly putting the half way done drink down.

you studied his features carefully, noting that his face was soft red and that he looked almost embarrassed to look you in the eye.

he looked down at his hands before taking yours with a soft smile.

"im okay dear, you being here is enough to get me through my worries."

"are you sure? you know you can tell me anything."

"of course, you'd be the first person id tell love."

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𓂃۶ৎ SHEN

doesn't get drunk

literally is just incapable of getting drunk

drinks as much as he wants

there were only two questions on your mind as you were seated next to the weird guy you started hanging out with who's name was 'jackie lee'.

1. why were you here in the first place?

and

2. what the hell is this guy made of?

the guy was completely odd to say the most and he definitely also had a thing for getting dead drunk - or so you thought.

here was the man jackie lee in all of his glory, downing drink after drink, most of them being beer, and having absolutely no reaction.

not even a stutter or shade of red was on him, just pure tomfoolery as he put on a nonchalant face while drinking drink after drink.

you were questioning on whether you should talk or not but you kept getting discouraged by the way he just kept drinking.

while many questions were going through your mind, you had unknowingly put on a disgusted face while looking at him and obviously, he noticed.

"why are you looking at me like that? did I do something?"

you quickly fixed your face before blurting out something you really shouldn't have.

"how can you drink so much?"

"how can you barely drink 2 beers?"

"touché."

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𓂃۶ৎ WAKATSUKI

another "i only drink when I'm stressed" er

not surprisingly i don't think he gets drunk

too responsible

coming back to this so I don't mischaracter the hell outta him

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𓂃۶ৎ SAW PAING

well i mean yells somehow even louder than he usually does

also is very energetic like he usually is but this also means that he might do crazy shit.

also yaps about nonsense

his hangovers ARE CRAZY

little sad puppy the whole next day bc his head is killing him, as well as his vocal chords

"saw please shut up, your killing me right now."

"HUUUUUUUUUH? CMON, CMON, CMON! [name], YOU CANT BE JUST LOUNGING AROUND! YOU GOTTA PUMP YOURSELF UP LIKE ME!"

you rolled your eyes lovingly. saw paing wasn't an easy guy to have a crush on but you still loved him that way. you currently were sitting by him while he was yelling his heart out about pumping yourself up and being the best out there.

"saw, you should really stop before you come complaining that your head hurts to me again."

saw whipped his head in your direction before opening his mouth wide again to yell nonsense once more. that was a habit you really needed him to stop.

you stood up from the stone ledge you were sitting on to slight tap his shoulder so that you could give him the sternest look you possibly could without laughing.

"don't come crying to me if your head hurts, 'kay?"

"WHAT?! A MAN NEVER CRIES, EVEN IF HES IN PAIN!"

"yeah, we'll see about that."

SORRY, SAW PAINGS PART WAS A BIT RUSHED!

𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙨 𝙗𝙚𝙡𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙤𝙣! 𝘿𝙤 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙖𝙡 𝙤𝙧 𝙘𝙤𝙥𝙮 𝙢𝙮 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙠.

[sun-marie]

this whole discussion around rap is a reminder for me how silly the concept of loving/hating and ENTIRE GENRE of music is to me.

Like. Do y'all have any idea how much music there is in the world. I can Guarantee you every genre has AT LEAST ONE song that clicks with you, you just gotta find it

[rare-prism-s]

YIPPEE

[imminent-danger-came]

Hi again! Listen, if we indeed get the MK vs SWK fight you've been predicting, I want it to be CATHARTIC. I want both parties fighting to show the RAWEST, UGLIEST, MOST FUCKED UP parts of themselves to each other without holding back, and embrace those parts in one another wholeheartedly just as much at the end. And I don't want this fight to be at the end of the show, no, I want it to be inn the midle of the show run, not even just a few episodes spare afterwards but several seasons, to see them work on the ruined previous framework and build on it as a sturdier, more stable foundation, and I want to see it unfold and develop in the show. I want to see them fight together with that new bond against the big boss or whatever passes as it. I think what I'm trying to say is Eldritch!MK better not be the last boss, and that even in a fight with out-of-control MK, SWK still unconsciously holds back even if he doesn’t want to. Also for Wukong to show his OG power in its full glory at the end against the final boss who is hopefully not Eldritch MK. You may disagree with some of my points but we can agree to disagree. Eat fruits!

DUDE. YES.

In my mind I've never thought of Eldritch!MK as the final big bad, legitimately. Which now I realize that's kinda silly, because the show could go that direction, but in my mind MK would be pushed further down a path of chaos by being manipulated by our new antagonist. This isn't something he would want ("This isn't what I wanted!" for the sweet sweet Azure parallel), but something he'd be pushed into—whether through manipulation, or past memories, or some reveal or WHATEVER it is that pushes him to the brink.

Ultimately however, MK has to eventually defy his fate and use his powers to leave the world "better than he found it"—he has to come to terms with the fact that he'll hurt people, and people will hurt him, and that's how life works. He ultimately has to accept himself. Being the "final boss" of the show would leave very little time for MK to truly learn to love himself and learn who he truly is, which is why I think it probably won't happen. Maybe he'd be the final boss of a season—but certainly not the show as a whole.

But a cathartic and messy Wukong and MK fight? That's something I am hoping we get, and think we definitely have the potential to get! Here's a short list of people who have chewed Wukong out thus far:

Mei (3x10)

Macaque (4x11)

Curse MK (4x07)

Azure (4x13)

Pigsy (2x10)

Ne Zha (3x01, 3x10)

Now, with how often it's brought up the ways in which Wukong has failed MK...don't you think MK should have a turn here? MK gets close in 2x07, but there he's yelling at Macaque disguised as Wukong, so obviously that doesn't count. We are long overdue for MK himself laying out all of the hurt and anger he's been holding onto for 4 seasons—that itself needs to happen, whether it's through a physical fight or not.

And after finally, EVERYTHING is out in the open, they can build their relationship stronger than it was before. I, like you, really do hope Wukong and MK (or even MK and Mei tbh) fight together against our last big bad. Honestly watching them fight together in 4x13 was so fulfilling, seeing them bounce off one another and work together just like MK always wanted.

However, I am also ready for them to tear each other apart (MK for SWK literally, but SWK for MK probably metaphorically lol) and then build each other back up, both of them fully accepting each other, flaws and all. Just because you love each other doesn't mean you won't hurt one another, you know? Just because you love someone doesn't mean they're not flawed. And in some ways, I think both Sun Wukong and MK need to accept that fact about each other. Like, this confrontation needs to be MESSY and RAW, and I think a climatic anime battle is a great way to do that (4x13 MK V Azure fight proving my point perfectly, or honestly even something like Samadhi Fire Mei in 3x10).

But those are just my thoughts!

[armafidelium]

something i look forward to hopefully exploring in his phel's canon verse is him gaining trust in others and kinda just . . . learning to be a person outside of his duty. we'll see how long that kinda stuff takes but i enjoy exploration like that

[aguineapigcouldntdothis]

rating different ways that characters are generally revealed to be jewish in tv and movies made by (mostly) goyim:

B'nei mitzvah mention: 3/10, points taken off for laziness. kept some because it's an important event so I get why it's used

B'nei mitzvah scene: 8/10, can either be really good or really bad depending how accurate. honestly ranges from a 5/10-11/10

Chanukkah mention: 0/10, im so tired of this one its so overdone and it's always in the christmas specials. it can be done right but like that's only if jews are writing the scene

Pesach mention: 4/10, definitely a better holiday to use than chanukah because it's not done to death and it isn't automatically paired with christmas. points removed for the inevitable inaccuracies

Rosh Hashanah mention: 7.5/10 just for using a holiday that most people wouldn't think of or may not even know of

Literally any other jewish holiday: 9/10 how do you know about this who told you

Any jewish holiday scene: 7.5/10, which actually means it can range from 5-10 depending on how ridiculous and wrong the scene is making my rating perfectly average.

shabbat mention: 8/10, kinda love it. it's also really good for casual conversations because its a weekly occurrence so there's plenty of ways for it to feel natural when bringing it up in a script

shabbat dinner scene: 15/10 absolutely love it especially bc it shows character dynamics in a casual setting. if there's anything incorrect it doesn't bother me much because the ways people observe shabbat vary a lot

"im jewish": 10/10 straight to the point no notes love it

literally any mention of money/greed/power: -10/10 shut up shut up shut up why is your only jewish character rich and greedy and why is that their defining trait

antisemitic comments: -15/10 why can't you think of anything nice to say.

nose comments: -100/10 needs to be in a separate category because I hate it so much. somehow even worse when its a goyische actor wearing a prosthesis and caked on "jewish" makeup bc like how are you being fake racist rn

not even saying anything and just making it painfully obvious: 8/10, yeah that character's last name is goldberg so it's pretty clear and I like that. I do wish it was mentioned upfront though

brit milah mention: 5/10, its usually played for laughs which feels a bit weird but not weird enough for me to care. this is a true neutral

having them wear a kippah/magen david/anything visibly jewish from the second theyre introduced: 100/10 my favorite by far because it's made clear from the start and there's no question about it

[yeagersss]

Sukuna x quiet!Reader - College AU - Part 1/?

Note: completely self-indulgent because I'm studying abroad rn and am a very quiet person :')

Basically he approaches you for a final grade project. He usually pairs with Gojo, Geto and Nanami but in this elective, you can only work in a group of 2. So with Gojo pairing up with Geto ("Sorry man ╰(●▿●)╯") and Nanami not taking the elective, he's left finding a partner on his own.

Technically he can ask anyone and anyone will be willing to work together with the Sukuna Ryomen, but he takes his studies seriously. He has a merit scholarship. So he needs someone equally serious about this.

Because really who wouldn't want to be paired up with the campus heartthrob? The sexy, tattooed bad boy who's leading the basketball team. Men want to be his friends. Women want to be in his bed... So he needs to be picky.

So he spots you. Sitting in the corner of the lecture hall, typing away on your laptop while listening intendly to the professor's words.

He's seen you around the campus. Walking around with large headphones on, or sitting under a tree and tapping away on your iPad. You're usually alone.

He's never seen you in any of his matches nor parties. But he's seen you plenty of times in the library, scribbling on your tablet. It's like your lost in your own little world and that's when it clicks to him that you don't care who he is... So you're fucking perfect for this project.

So he approaches you after class. Just before you can slip on your headphones and walk away, you hear a gruff "hey". You turn around and look at him in surprise. "um... hello." You say softly.

He looks at you. Unsure of what to think of you. You're like an anomaly to him with how quiet and reserved you seem. "you got a partner for the project?" he asks.

You shake your head. You didn't know anyone in this class and the one girl you were acquainted with was working with her friend so you were just going to ask the professor to pair you up with someone randomly (and pray they weren't a free rider).

"well I need a partner and you look like you actually take this shit seriously so you want to pair up?" Sukuna asks. You eye him carefully. You know who Sukuna is, so you're a bit suspicious why this man would approach you of all people when he can have anyone else.

But considering you had no other options and you knew Sukuna was an exceptional student who is serious about his studies (you had way too much experience with free riders and despise it) you can't say no and agreed. It's just a project. You can tell he doesn't seem to have any interest in you besides working together to get a good grade.

Sukuna nods, pulling out his phone and giving you his number. "Let's meet up tomorrow to discuss the topic, yeah?" He asks to which you again nod, saving his number and shooting a quick text to him so he can have your number too.

And while all of this was happening, your shoulders were tense with how you can feel people's eyes on you. Some were frowning, some were glaring and some were looking in surprise.

You place your headphones on and with a quick "bye" you were out of the classroom and away from the scrutinising looks.

Sukuna walks over to Gojo and Geto who joke about him being desperate enough to get together with the "quiet girl who doesn't even talk".

He rolls his eyes and looks down at the text you had send him earlier, a small "hi y/n here". He saves your number and pockets his phone as the three of them start walking to basketball practice.

[springwitch8]

flowers and firsts (melissa schemmenti x fem!reader)

summary: being the gracious friend you are, you offer to share your weed with melissa and jacob for a fun friday night at their place. when jacob goes to bed, things get heated between you and your favorite coworker.

warnings: smut (18+), consensual high sex, recreational marijuana use (be responsible), strap-ons, praise kink, vibrators, soft melissa, stoner reader, attempts at comedy (it's a fun fic guys), mario kart 8 GONE SEXUAL

notes: happy 4/20. this wasn't requested, but my OCD is beating the fuck out of me rn and writing it brought me comfort. let me know what you think. much love from your favorite slutty stoner 💚

"i know kids are curious, but eighth grade is a bit early to try weed, right?" jacob bounced his leg anxiously as he raised the question to his friends in the teachers' lounge. one of his students had just been suspended for bringing marijuana to school, and jacob was characteristically worried about the kid.

"i started in tenth grade, but teenagers are growin' up younger and younger these days," melissa responded. barbara raised her eyebrows in shock, and melissa reacted with an amused half-smile. "like trouble over here. when was your first time, hon?"

you tried to ignore the innuendo as melissa invited you into the conversation. you had been hired to teach the third grade a few months ago. you and melissa had a rapport from the first moment you walked into the lounge. every time you were in a room together, you made each other laugh. melissa made you feel at ease in your new workplace, and you felt lucky to have her.

because you both got along so well, ava often paired you up for team-building exercises and combined-class activities. the two of you weren't exactly close friends yet, but you had chemistry. that much was obvious to everyone at abbott.

"tenth grade for me, too," you answered between sips of your morning coffee. "a friend and i did it in the bathroom before art class. good memories."

"what, did you have some kinda fancy vape pen?" melissa cocked an eyebrow at you.

"i wouldn't call it fancy, but yeah, we mostly smoked carts," you explained. "bought 'em from the upperclassmen in the parking lot before school. i'm pretty sure they weren't pure weed, though. we had to be smoking battery acid, or plastic or something."

"god, your generation is weird. smokin' chemicals out of a flash drive," melissa said, gesturing wildly to convey her amazement. "the first time i got high was in detention. my buddy steve would sneak in and bring us cigarettes and blunts. they all looked the same, so we played russian roulette with it. now everybody walks around with those neon devices in their pockets."

"i can't tell if you're being serious or if you're referencing the breakfast club," you giggled, nudging the redhead's shoulder jokingly as you sat down next to her.

"ha ha, very funny, little miss," melissa deadpanned. you had asked her to stop calling you "kid" a few weeks ago. she respected your wishes by coming up with all sorts of endearing synonyms to call you instead. "what about you, jacob? you used to vape—ever experimented with mary jane?"

"or mark john?" you added. melissa snorted and gave you a playful swat on the arm.

"no, actually, i haven't," jacob said, rolling his eyes at your quip. "i didn't have many friends in high school or college, and after that i had to be drug tested regularly for teachers without borders. i never got the chance."

"well, if you ever feel like trying something new, i have plenty to share," you offered. "can't have you over at my place, though; every time i bring guests around, my crazy neighbor thinks they're cia operatives."

everyone in the room except melissa gave you a shocked look. barbara looked especially aghast, her brightly painted lips curled into an 'o' shape.

"damn, i thought janine was the only after-school stoner here. what a pleasant surprise!" ava broke the silence.

"i suppose i would partake given one of those weed pens you mentioned," jacob said to you. "the only thing i've been vaping lately is air, and it gets stale after a while."

"oh no, i haven't used a cart since high school," you clarified. "if you're smoking with me, you're smoking. don't worry, it's easy. just like vaping, but better in every way."

"first of all, no smoke circle is happening under my roof without me." melissa chimed in, looking at you with a silent question in her eyes. you nodded—of course you wanted her there. "and second, where do you even get the weed? if you buy the legal stuff from new york or massachusetts, you're not bringin' it to my house."

"i wouldn't dream of it," you affirmed. "i only smoke authentic philly weed. don't worry about it; i got a guy."

---

that friday night, you showed up on melissa's doorstep wearing a casual t-shirt dress, with a tote bag full of goodies slung over your shoulder. jacob was the one to answer the door.

"hey! come on in, melissa's making pizza," he said cheerfully, a bit jittery with anticipation.

you followed jacob inside and found melissa leaning over the kitchen island, smiling fondly at you. she was wearing sweatpants and a loose-fitting striped shirt, with her hair loose and a bit messy from cooking. she looked radiant and comfortable.

"you know, the pizza will taste better if we smoke before dinner," you proposed.

"bold of you to assume my pizza could taste any better," melissa joked back.

"i'm game," jacob said. "i want the full marijuana experience."

"in that case, help me set up," you said to the history teacher. "i want you to see how everything works."

you laid the contents of your tote bag out on the island countertop: a ziploc baggie full of flower, a little purple grinder, a holographic pink bowl, and a yellow lighter with white flowers on it.

"jacob, this is a grinder," you said, uncapping the grinder and opening the ziploc bag. "we're gonna use it to break up the flower into little pieces."

"oh wow, that is... pungent," jacob remarked. he watched as you ground up the weed, then handed the pink glass bowl to him.

"and this is a bowl, or a pipe if you're lame," you said. "you wanna do the honors?"

jacob grinned and reached into the grinder, bouncing excitedly on his heels. you put a hand on his shoulder to steady him. he filled the bowl, looking to you for approval several times while he did it.

"awesome, we're ready," you said. melissa placed her pizza in the oven and joined the circle.

"let's take it out on the patio," melissa suggested.

she led you and jacob out to the patio, a small ledge overlooking the city with three chairs conveniently set up in a tight circle. it was 7pm and the sun had just begun its descent, casting philadelphia in an orange glow.

the three of you sat down. you held the bowl up to your lips and moved to light it, but melissa snatched the lighter from your hand. she leaned in and held the flame to the bowl, her face inches from yours. you tried to concentrate on the task at hand, rather than her painted lips or her vivid green eyes dancing all over you.

you took a long inhale of the smoke and blew it up toward the sky. melissa plucked the bowl out of your hand and took a hit. she held the smoke in her lungs for an impressive amount of time for someone who didn't smoke regularly. she passed the still-lit bowl to jacob.

as soon as jacob took his hit, you knew it was gonna hurt. he overestimated his own lung capacity, and he didn't even finish blowing the smoke out before he was coughing.

"happens to everybody, pal," melissa patted jacob's back to ease his pain.

"ugh!" jacob sputtered between coughs. "why didn't you guys tell me smoking hurts?"

---

several rotations later, the three of you were high. well, you and melissa were high; jacob was outright fried. not altogether unexpected, but funny as hell.

when melissa's pizza was done, you all resolved to eat outside so you could watch the sunset together.

"this is heavenly, mel," you moaned after a delicious bite of the pizza.

"ha!" jacob exclaimed, and you and melissa turned to him, confused. meeting melissa's gaze, he threw his arms up in the air—like he expected her to understand what he meant by that one noise. "she stole two syllables from your name. you can't just take syllables, y/n. they're not yours."

"since when do you care about private property rights?" you quipped back before turning your attention to melissa. "i'm serious though. this pizza is sooo good. like last-meal-on-death-row good."

"keep talkin' sweet like that, and you can call me whatever you want," melissa replied with a wink, sending a flood of warmth to your face.

"what were we talking about? just now?" jacob chimed in, his eyes wide and darting every which way.

"... i actually don't know," you said with a giggle. you tried to remember, you really did. but you could feel melissa's eyes on you, and you heard her words echoing in your head. and it was hard to focus on anything else.

"short term memory loss! add that to the list of things you guys didn't warn me about," jacob scoffed.

"jacob, eat your damn pizza," melissa cut in. a peaceful smile graced her lips as she stared out at the city skyline, now a twilight blue in the absence of the sun. "i've missed this feeling, everythin' all fuzzy and light. how are you holding up, lovebug?"

your heart fluttered at the endearing name. melissa, it seemed, wore her heart on her sleeve when she was high���judging by the adoring way she gazed at you while she awaited your response. maybe the weed was messing with your head, but you swore she'd never looked so beautiful.

her eyes lacked any trace of the fire you were used to seeing (though they were quite red). for once, she wasn't on guard. her plump lips curled around her wine glass as she took a sip of merlot, vocalizing her sensual appreciation with a hum.

her long auburn hair was tucked behind her ears, resting on her shoulders in loose waves instead of her preferred meticulous curls. you wanted to run your fingers through her locks, feel their softness and smell her shampoo.

entranced by the redhead, you forgot she had asked you a question. melissa tapped your knee in reminder.

"i feel perfect," was your soft reply. you were beaming brightly before the sentence even finished. rather than sitting in a chair, you felt like you were floating on a cloud. the colors of melissa's patio and the sky blended together in a beautiful, swirling mosaic. the sounds of the city were clear and pleasant as philly wound down for the night. "i'm so happy."

"glad to hear it, sunshine. but i'm pretty sure jacob is asleep," melissa chuckled and patted the man's shoulder. he didn't stir, remaining slumped and conked out in his chair. "he's been losin' sleep over the kid who got suspended. bending over backwards trying to keep 'em on track."

"oh gosh," you said sympathetically before patting jacob a bit more firmly than melissa had. "jacob, hey. c'mon, it's time for bed. get up, go get cozy."

your words were slurred and hushed, but they seemed to pierce the veil of jacob's slumber as he awoke with a start.

melissa stood behind jacob's chair, gently rocking it back and forth to bring him back to the conscious world.

"can't go to bed, we just started," jacob grumbled, but his eyes were still closed. he was dangerously close to falling asleep again.

"from the looks of it, you're either gonna spend the night sleepin' in this chair or in your bed, so get up," melissa said resolutely.

"yeah, and besides, there's always next time," you assured jacob as he stretched and groaned his way into an upright position. you made eye contact with melissa, and this time you winked.

---

after helping jacob into bed (his motor skills really deteriorated when he got high) and smoking another bowl together, you and melissa were ready to continue your night.

"alright, sweetheart, it's down to you and me," melissa said, sitting down next to you on the couch. "what do you wanna do?" you pondered the question, looking around the room for inspiration.

"oh my god, you have a nintendo switch?" you asked excitedly, gesturing to the black tablet plugged in next to the cable box.

"that's jacob's. he showed me one of the games on there—animal crossing, i think it was. i don't get it. why play a game if you can't win?"

"alright, i know what we have to do now," you said, walking over to jacob's game cabinet and pulling out mario kart 8. holding the case up for melissa to see, you grinned. "four races. whoever wins gets whatever she wants from the other."

you were distantly aware of the implications, but you were too high to reconsider what you'd proposed.

you figured melissa would want something from your thoroughly decorated classroom if she won. if you won, you'd ask her to make you a custom pizza.

"you have no idea what you just started, hon," melissa said with a confident smirk.

"may the best woman win."

---

how the hell was she so good at everything?

melissa had needed some time to warm up to the switch controls, complaining about how the little red rectangle was too small to hold comfortably. but she was a quick learner with skilled fingers, and soon she was absolutely demolishing you.

it also didn't help that your coordination escaped you when you were high. you had driven off of too many ledges to count.

"two wins in a row for luigi," melissa bragged as she crossed the finish line of the third race. "hope you're ready to give me whatever i want, princess. don't think i forgot about our bet."

"daisy won the first race," you pointed out calmly. "i can still bring it back. but you know what this last race has to be?"

"what?"

"rainbow road. it's the perfect final showdown course," you explained, navigating to the course with your controller.

"get ready to be mine for a night," melissa said lowly. god, you knew she was talking about the bet, but she knew damn well what she was doing. by this point your panties were almost uncomfortably wet.

you leaned into her unconsciously as the race countdown began. you both held your controllers tight, almost shoulder to shoulder.

3...

2... (you push down the gas pedal button)

1...

GO!!!

daisy took off with a boost of speed thanks to your timing. luigi had a false start as his engine blew out. you cheered, and melissa cursed.

"how the fuck do you do that?" she asked, exasperated.

"play the game!" you demanded without looking away from the screen.

the competition was intense. you and melissa weaved around curves, nearly fell off the road, passed and bumped each other. neither one of you spoke until lap 3.

coming up on one of the last turns of the last lap, your hands jerked and you swerved. reacting on instinct, you bent your arms dramatically in the other direction to overcorrect.

melissa's arm bumped into yours, sending your controller flying out of your hands.

"hey!" you said, thinking she was cheating.

"hey yourself," she said, her eyes still fixed on the screen.

if she was gonna play dirty, so were you. you thrust your arm forward to grab her controller. but she saw you coming from a mile away. effortlessly, she shifted the controller into her left hand alone and held it up and out of your reach.

desperately competitive (and stupid high), you launched yourself toward the controller. you'd stop at nothing to get even. before you could snatch it out of her grasp, though, your balance faltered. you fell out of your position and started to fall backwards off the couch.

melissa dropped the controller and wrapped her arms around you, pulling you back up before you could hurt yourself. there was only one problem with this heroic act.

you were in her lap now.

her hands remained clasped at the small of your back, and your balance shifted forward. you put your arms out for stability, and wrapped them around her neck.

"careful, don't hurt your pretty head," melissa cooed. the two of you stared at each other for a moment. she surged forward and pressed her lips to yours.

if sitting outside with her felt like floating, kissing her and feeling her body against yours felt like riding the ocean waves. but unlike the atlantic, she was warm. you relaxed into her warmth as her tongue licked into your mouth.

you felt her tongue everywhere. in response to her, you gave a few tentative kitten licks. she moaned, she moaned, and pulled back before giving you one last kiss on the lips.

she stared at you with heated eyes for a while before switching her focus to the tv.

"look, baby," she said smugly while gesturing to the tv screen, where luigi was driving victory laps after placing first on rainbow road. "i won. you remember what that means?"

it was a fair question, considering how many conversations you forgot happened tonight. still, you nodded shyly and bit your lip.

"smart girl," melissa praised. "can you guess what i want from you?"

you shook your head no with a frown. melissa beamed and kissed you on the forehead. then she leaned in to whisper in your ear.

"i wanna touch you everywhere. i wanna hear your pretty voice moan my name and see your face scrunch up when you come. i want you to feel me all over you, and i want you to spend the rest of your life craving that feeling," melissa said her piece all at once, as if revealing a long-buried secret to you and herself.

you swallowed.

"would you let me do that?"

you nodded, pressing your forehead against hers.

"i need to hear you say it," she said softly, so softly you almost missed it.

"i want you, melissa. i have since the day we met."

that was all the confirmation melissa needed to attack your face and neck with kisses.

"sorry, let me just," melissa said as she pulled away abruptly and reached for the tv remote. she changed it to cable mode and navigated to the jazz music channel. "there we go, perfect."

"you're ridiculous," you giggled upon seeing melissa's proud face.

"honey," she leaned in to nip at your ear before whispering, "watch your mouth. you wanna be on my good side tonight, trust me."

you shuddered and wiggled in her lap, aching for her touch. a slow grin spread across her face and her hands found your legs, running up your thighs and lightly dragging her nails along your skin. they soon made their way up your waist to your breasts, cupping and squeezing them. melissa even took two fingernails and circled your nipples teasingly, to which you squeaked.

"do you know how many times i thought about havin' you like this?" melissa whispered. her voice was sweet like molasses and flowed right through you. you could feel your nipples tingling where her fingers had been, swimming in a bubble of desire. "in my lap, all whiny and squirmy."

she pinched your nipple and you keened. you held your breath as her hands once again traveled to your thighs, making a beeline for your core.

"and now i got my angel in my arms," she said, gently spreading your legs for better access. you sucked in a breath and trembled when her palm caressed you through your panties. "but i gotta say, even in my imagination you were never this wet for me."

she punctuated the sentence by pressing her pointer finger on your clit through the fabric, drawing tiny circles. you gasped and hid your face in her neck. the high made every touch feel like it rippled through your whole body. the world felt like it had been knocked off its axis, and melissa was your new center of gravity.

"aw, don't be embarrassed, babygirl. it's cute you're so sensitive," melissa soothed, easing you out of the crook of her neck to face her again. she trailed her fingers down to swirl around your wetness under your panties. "let me take care of you, yeah?"

---

a few minutes later, you were spread out on melissa's bed, naked save for your (now useless) panties. she'd practically carried you to her room as you were baked and horny and unable to walk straight.

in spite of your writhing and needy whines, the redhead took her time to savor you. she kissed every inch of your torso before she even considered taking your panties off, mumbling sweet nothings between love bites.

when she finally pulled away to admire her work, the view did not disappoint. you were panting and covered in melissa's marks, and god, you were her favorite piece of art ever created. all hers.

"alright, sweet girl, i know," she cooed as you continued to plead for her touch with your best pout and puppy eyes. unable to resist you, melissa hooked two fingers in the waistband of your panties. "i'm gonna slip these off ya, okay? there, down they go."

melissa discreetly tucked the saturated material into her pocket. not as a trophy or proof of her conquest; rather, a token from the first of many magical nights with her girl. she would treasure it.

she wasted no time getting situated between your legs so she was face-to-face with your pussy. she inhaled deeply, basking in the heady aroma of your arousal. you overwhelmed her senses. everything she saw, everything she smelled, everything she felt, everything she thought—it was all one big, bottomless pool of you. and there was only one sense left for you to conquer.

the first drag of her tongue up your slit set you ablaze, flames licking from your core all the way to your extremities and your head. she let out a small noise of appreciation, and you felt it more than you heard it.

"you taste like fuckin' heaven," melissa rumbled between determined licks through your folds. her comment reminded you of the pizza, and you found yourself amused at how much things had changed in just a few hours.

"last-meal-on-death-row good?" you joked, and melissa seized the moment of levity to latch onto your clit. you cried out before remembering jacob was sleeping in the next room. you clapped a hand over your mouth.

"mhmmmmm," she moaned in agreement, and the vibrations on your bundle felt incredible. "but if you're still crackin' jokes, i'm not doin' my job."

with that, she shut you up completely. her tongue poked at your clit between harsh sucks. your back arched and melissa changed her strategy, prodding at your entrance with her tongue while her fingers took over on your clit. when her tongue penetrated you, you bit down on your hand to keep from screaming.

"i said i wanna hear you, remember?" melissa pulled out to chastise you.

"but jacob—" you managed.

"is passed out. he's dead to the world. now sing for me, angel," melissa's tongue dove back into your weeping cunt and lapped at your walls. you wailed her name.

"oh, mel, right—ahhh—there!" you mewled as her tongue teased your most sensitive spot. now that she'd located her target, melissa changed her play once again. two fingers replaced her tongue and crooked into your g-spot while her mouth returned to your clit. "close..."

melissa nodded her permission, her mouth busy with your button. with another hard roll of your clit between her lips and drive of her fingers into your sweet spot, you fell apart. you moaned and cried unbidden as she worked you through your orgasm, which felt twice as powerful thanks to the intoxication factor. your body shook in the grip of seemingly endless waves of heat.

your climax eventually died down and you squirmed away from melissa's touch. your mouth opened in dismay when instead of staying by your side, she stood up and disappeared into her closet.

after a short while, the older woman reappeared by your side. she was now nude and sporting a long, girthy strap-on. she placed a few other items on the nightstand, but you couldn't tear your eyes away from the thick faux cock. unless it was to look at her gorgeous tits, which swung with her every move. she was a goddess.

"okay, sweets, i'm gonna spell this out nice and slow because i know your brain is a little messy right now," she said as she crawled on top of you. "i'm gonna fuck you with my strap. and i know it's so big, but i have this to help you take it."

melissa reached over to the nightstand and retrieved a green mini wand vibrator. her intentions were clear, and you gulped. the redhead peppered kisses all over your face in reassurance.

"now relax, little love. let me in," melissa instructed as the wand buzzed to life. she smeared your wetness around your clit with her fingers, then pulled back its hood to position the vibrator tightly against your nub. even the lowest setting was a shock at such a direct angle.

while you were distracted trying to adjust to the clitoral stimulation, melissa aligned the tip of the dildo with your entrance and pushed in. you both groaned, and you felt yourself stretch around the toy. melissa turned up the vibrations on your clit as she progressed to being fully seated inside you.

"that's a good girl, so brave," melissa cooed. you thrashed underneath her, the sensations overstimulating you. the pain of the intrusion staved off a powerful orgasm from the wand vibrator.

again, you wondered if the drugs were messing with your mind—the dildo felt indistinguishable from a part of mel's body, and you were full to the brim of her.

as she began to rock her hips back and forth, you saw her bite her lip. you assumed that the strap had some kind of clit attachment for her based on the telltale signs of pleasure.

melissa built up a steady rhythm and drank in your pathetic sounds of pleasure. her tits swung in your face with every thrust, and you made a mental note to give them proper attention next time. with another tactical increase to the wand's speed, you felt yourself approaching the edge once more.

"you gettin' close? yeah, i can tell. feels too good to hide it, huh bunny?" that was a new one. you clenched at her words and she set the wand to its maximum power, rubbing it up and down on your clit. your vision went white and you spun out of reality as you came. "that's my girl. good little princess, coming so hard for me."

with a few more thrusts, melissa also came to a release. she shuddered and shimmied her hips at random while she rode it out. as soon as she recovered, she turned off the green wand and relieved you. next, she eased herself out of and off of you.

with a chaste peck to your lips, she sat upright and reached for the nightstand. she smiled at your fucked-out expression as she laid out the pajamas she'd picked out for you.

you watched in awe as she took off the strap and put on her own sleep clothes. her red hair was wild from the night's activities and glowed like a warm hearth against the white backdrop of her walls.

in your state, you wanted nothing more than to cuddle up with melissa and fall asleep. but she insisted that you get ready for bed so that you'd be comfortable through the night. she guided you into the bathroom and gave you a new toothbrush to use.

returning to the bedroom, you found a silky green nightgown with flowers on it waiting on the bed for you. given your exhausted and intoxicated state, melissa had to help you into it. neither of you minded. as a reward for your cooperation, she gave you a kiss.

the two of you snuggled into bed, tucked in together with you curled up against her chest. the tides of slumber lapped at your feet.

"g'night, lovebug," melissa whispered as you drifted off. "sleep well. see you in the morning."

and tomorrow would be the first of a lifetime of tomorrows waking up in her arms.

[cvnt4him]

this been on my mind for awhile 😭

so like subby Izuku but he has a slight dominant side when he gets aroused with his girlfriend who is a switch 😚

NEVER. Be afraid to tell me your sinful ideas on izuku. He is literally my pride n joy. I have SHITTY writers block rn n can't think of anything but when I tell you I jump out of my seat for this shit. Fuck writers block you're getting this shite NEOW.

Who knew studying with your boyfriend would lead to him whimpering under you, grabbing at your waist and grinding your hips down onto his hardening cock.

He initially did intend on simply studying with you, honest, however you are his weakness, the one thing that makes him act up. [Besides when someone mentions all might] so yeah of course when he seen you in tight booty shorts that hugged you ass and your tank top that lifted over your tummy slightly, he knew it was wraos for him.

You knew it as well, he was very easily excited. Just staring at him too long might make his cock jump in his shorts. You guys had been studying for about 2 hours, just the two of you in his all might merchandised room. Alone.

Sure you had been dating for a year, but it doesn't matter how long you guys have been dating to him he'll always get so easily flustered like you two had just met. It was adorable how easy he was to tease, he loved it even when he told you he hated it.

You groan loudly slamming your face on your notebook hardly causing him to jump and shoot his worry filled eyes over to your slumped body.

"haha... How about we take a break."

He tells you, rubbing his hand down your back soothingly, earning a small sigh from you. He chuckles to himself as you turn to look up at him head still laying on the desk.

"yes please."

He pulls your chair closer to his so he can hold you, wrapping his much larger arms around your figure. His hand landing on the back of your head and rubbing his thumb across it. Laying his chin atop of your head with a content sigh.

He was happy like this. With you. There was nothing or anyone that could take you away from him. He loved just sitting down with you and having little movie dates alone, when you got little moments like these to yourselves. You were home for him. Despite everything you've been through together throughout the last years, he'd do it all again just for you to be like this In his arms.

The warmth that began to be created by your two bodies flushed together soon vanished, a low groan leaving his mouth as he opens his eyes and looks down at you questioningly, why had you pulled away?

You look up at him with a smile and kiss his cheek softly. His eyes widen as his pouty lips turn into a weary smile, he was flushed like a strawberry, his reddening face growing hotter by the second. Little affectionate things like that meant everything to him. He doesn't intend to get this flustered, especially because you two have been dating for about a year, but he can never seem to help what you do to him.

You pull away before going back into pepper plenty of soft quick kisses across his warm flushed baby like face. A string of giggles and laughs escape the two of you, he chants and tells you to stop but you both know he doesn't mean it.

Once you finally stop the two of your laughs trail off with a sigh. He looks down at you with love filled eyes as you stare up at him with just as ones. You chuckled lightly and kiss his soft, warm, slightly dry lips. His eyes flutter shut as he sighs into the kiss. Neither of you pulling away, just living in this one loving kiss. The passion in it was so beautiful he could feel the butterflies in his stomach start to flutter in a ridiculous way.

You straightened yourself up to pull him deeper into the kiss, moaning slightly as you wrap your arms around his neck. His hands find themselves in your lower back trailing down to your waist as he holds you tightly.

The kiss grew heavy, heated, the way your bodies tried to move against each other but being held back by the separate chairs you two sat in. Your hands on either side of his face keeping him close to you. He grips your waist like his life depends on it, slight harshness coming from it.

Izuku couldn't stand not being able to hold you closer than what you are. He picks you up by your thighs making a squeak leave your throat, he carried you all the way to the bed and plopped down on top of you, your legs wrapped around him subconsciously. The kiss not breaking even once throughout this.

You pull away from the kiss to catch your breath izuku tries so hard to follow your lips, not wanting to be apart. You lick your lips and stare up at him with lidded eyes, you bit your lip and traced some of the freckles on his cheek with your finger. He looked down at you with a pouty look, making you chuckle softly to yourself.

He lays down completely on top of you his face burying itself in your boobs. He closed his eyes and just relished in the warmth your bossom provided to him. Blush rushed to his face when he slightly opened his eyes to see your perfect boobs squishing his face, he planted soft kisses on to them before he began sucking hickeys beginning to form at each spot he suckled on. He traced his tongue over them, slobber and spit making them sticky and wet. You hated the feeling but loved to watch him lose his mind over it.

He pulled your shirt down, your boobs spilling out the top and onto his face. He moaned and shook his head in between your boobs making you giggle. He moved to your nipple and began sucking on it like you had milk to provide, the harsh sucking making your nipples perk up in his mouth, the tip of his tongue kitten licking and prodding against your nipples earning a breathy moan from you.

"wan you sho' bad."

He tried to speak. His speech being muffled by your boob in his mouth. His bit down lightly on your boob making you wince.

You hadn't noticed at first, but he began grinding his hardening dick into your thigh, groaning from the light pleasure it gave him. Brushing his clothed cock against your warm thighs was starting to get to him heavily.

You pushed him over onto his back and began straddling him, getting on top of him and keeping your bossom in his face so he can continue to suck to his hearts content.

You scratched his head while you played on top of him giggling at how cute he is. You decided to take the liberty in ending his suffering which he clearly was by grinding into his effect cock, earning a low groan from him, the muffled groan that came from him vibrating through your body.

You put both your hands on his chest, making sure to keep your boobs in his face, so you can ride his clothed dick completely. Saying this didn't feel good would be a lie, this felt like heaven. Your cunt throbbing on top of his twitching cock. It yearned to be buried in your velvety walls, it wanted to find home in your warmth.

You continued the hump of your hips and closed your eyes, letting the pleasure take over you completely. Izuku stopped suckling on your boobs to look up at you, the sight he seen was enough to make him blow his shorts. He choked back moan from your blissful expression, trying so hard not to cum his shorts and embarrass himself.

Little did he know you wanted him to, it was a pleasure knowing that you made him feel so good to the point he'd cum his pants. He squeezes your hips and snaps his hips up into you and cums his shorts with a whiney moan, he breathed as if it were his first time. His chest rising and sinking in a rhythmic motion.

"f-- fuck!"

He choked out into the crook of your neck as he raised up to bury his face into it, his breath fanning the pit of your neck and making your face warm up. A shiver going down your spine from his hot breath touching your skin. He breathed in your scent and rolled his eyes shut and let the Aftershock of cumming take over him. He felt good, he had you in his arms and he'd came his pants---

Holy fuck he'd just came his pants. God he was so embarrassed. His eyes shot open and he tensed under your touch before a chuckle left your lips. Fuck you were sure to bully him. He had just cum his pants from simply making out.. and sucking on your tits... and well dry humping, but still. It was embarrassing and there was no way you'd let him live this down! It's not his fault though, he has such a sensitive body and he gets so hard when you so much as glance at him the, what else was he supposed to do? not cum his pants?

He tried to justify his actions in his head as if he'd just killed somebody. You grab him by the hair and look down at him from his lap taking in the sight. He had a flushed face and glossy eyes, he was so red and embarrassed he was sure he was going to die. He wanted to. He wanted the earth to swallow him whole.

"you're so beautiful."

You whisper down to him making him even more red as if that were even possible. His lidded eyes squinted as he tried to hide his face from you only to his surprise, be pulled back up by you.

You kiss his lips and begin taking off your shorts, standing slightly to get them off completely. You lift up to shimmery his shorts and boxers off. You look down to see the huge wet patch in his all might themed boxers where he soiled himself, he's still a bit dizzy from the breathtaking kiss you'd just given him, however he manages to look down at you and see the way you eyeball his still hard cock with a giggle.

He whines with a pouty look which catches your attention. He really was such a spoiled brat, you might just have to get him out of that another time, [hinting to a part two] as for now you were going to fuck his aching cock for all he was worth, and boy does he have alot to give.

You pull his boxers down in one swift motion crawling back on top of him before slamming yourself onto his thick leaking cock. He choked on his spit and let out a strangled moan he threw his head back instantly not expecting to be met with your warm welcoming walls that quickly, you bounced up and down in a repeated motion, convulsing walls massaging his thick cock each time you went down. You pushed him down completely onto the pillows letting him feel the pleasure you have to give.

He squeezes his eyes shut, tears prickling at the corner as he grabs into the sheet beneath you two. He tries so hard not to cum on the spot but he just can't seem to hold it all back, his thick precum leaks inside of you as you grind down onto his cock, moaning lowly as you try not to be too loud, but all hopes for people not hearing you is thrown out the window the second yku start back bouncing onto him.

He lets out such a pornographic moan, honestly pornstars would envy the sounds he let out in such high pitched ways. His back arched up into you as you put your hand on his chest to try and balance yourself, he thrusts up into you subconsciously trying so desperately to reach that peak of pleasure his body wanted to grant him.

You open your eyes slightly to see his fucked out expression, tears had started streaming down his cheeks as he drooled, he sniffed and bucked his hips up into you throwing you off guard, the rhythm that you had set had begun messing up. He hated how hard it was for his hips to meet your own, an annoyed whine escaping him as he groans and stops fucking up into you.

He shoots his wide eyes open and grabs hold of you, quickly pulling out so he can, in one swift motion spin you two around to put you down on your stomach. You couldn't even get a word out before all of the air was knocked out of your lungs by his cock intruding your insides in a painful thrust. He groaned while entering you at a berserk pace.

Izuku was never rough or this feral, but God it was absolutely insane the things you did to him how you managed to make him feel the way you arched you back and threw you ass back onto his thick cock, the stretch that always came with his cock was so delicious, he was jackhammering his cock into you while he tried so hard to not close his eyes. He wanted to watch you duck yourself back onto him, he wanted you to whine and beg when he left you.

He loved the way you arched your back, yet it seemed as if you weren't completely arched. It ticked him off. He put one of his large hands on your back and pushed your upper body down into the pillow, lift one of his legs to get a better angle to fuck you in. That was it, the way desperate grunted moans left your mouth was sinful.

The way you were limp against his cock yet still trying hard to fuck yourself back into him, it was all getting to him. Your body was so lewd and sexy he felt as if he couldn't hold onto his seed anymore he longed for it to be planted inside of you, the thought of all of his warm thick sticky cum settling inside of you was so dirty and hot to him he couldn't contain the way his hips stuttered and how his seed, his kids threaten to spill out of his throbbing cock head that kissed your cervix in the best way.

His muscles had started to tighten and feel slightly sore, he had been jackhammering into you at an intense pace for about an hour, it had started to get to him, but he wouldn't let that stop him from making sure you were fucked dumb. He groaned in pleasure and anger slapping your ass harshly, a red blotch starting to form in the area. He continued to slap your ass seeing the effect it had onto you, your ass jiggling against his pelvis the way he bucked into you and slapped your ass, it was hypnotic.

His eyes roll back as his eyebrows knit together, he was growing tired and was so close to cumming but he would, not yet.

Izukus sweaty chest leaned onto your back, his breath fanning your ear as he struggled to keep everything in, he was losing his composure and was starting to feel everything inside of him trying to unravel. His cock twitches inside of you as he moaned sluttyly inside of your ear, fuck the aay he moaned like a bitch was always so hot. He whines and whimpered for you and began begging for you to let him cum inside of you, to bury his seed in your warm welcoming hole.

"please please please let me give it to you, lemme give it t'ya.. please baby please!~"

You groaned one last time before squirting around his pretty cock, his cock wasn't too long but boy was it thick, so thick that when you squirted it just sucked him into you even more. He heard you hiccuping underneath him whilst letting little groans and moans out, your body was limo but he managed to hold your hips up enough so he could finish inside of you. The way your walls started to squeeze and choke his cock was insane, your juices started to squirt all over his lower abdomen making a moan rip out of him, and with that he came undone, all the cords in his body unraveling and making him shoot his hot cum inside of you. His eyes crossed as his tongue looked out of his mouth, he was just as fucked out as you and he was the one doing most of the fucking.

You were to fucked dumb to even comprehend what was going on, you're not even sure if you actually allowed him to cum inside of you. You couldn't get any words out, hell you could hardly even form a coherent thought. He collapsed onto you, all his weight weighing you down into the bed. You let out a groan once you felt his heavy body slam onto yours, you couldn't begin to care though, you were sweaty, hot and tired. Your eyes had shut long ago but it took his warm body landing onto you and cuddling close into yours for you to ultimately pass out.

He whines above you, his cock being overstimulated by your fluttering walls. He twitched inside of you while shutting his eyes. He was actually basically baby trapping you unconsciously and unintentionally. His cock plugged you till despite softening, you couldn't push him out and he had passed out before he could even attempt to take it out.

You were sure to be pissed in the morning and he knew and thought about that before lassing out above you, but that's a problem for another day.

[dinogoofymutated]

Hi!! I LOVE your Remy hcs! They were so sweet and in character 😊 I'm on my period and ya girl is suffering and I keep thinking that Remy would be the sweetest AND totally amazing in the fried food department 👀 Any hcs? Totally chill if nah

xx

Gambit/AFAB!reader!- Period HCS YES!!! just yes. absolutlely. I want to taste this man's cooking so bad but I am ridiculously sensitive to spice and would probably die.

I have a similar req for Nightcrawler as well so keep an eye out for that one too ;) Sorry that this is a little short!

TWS: Menstrual cycles. Cramps. Menstrual cravings. Damn I'm hungry rn ngl. Can be read as GN as no pronouns are mentioned.

If cooking Isn't one of Remy's love languages I'm calling bull!!

I mean, who else would go out of their way to cook beignets for breakfast? I mean, sure, he could have made the dough beforehand but seriously that shit takes time.

I 100% believe he would go out of his way to make you anything you were craving on your period. Fried chicken? Done. Beignets? Obviously. Done! Hell, you want stuffed french toast but every time you try to make it you fail miserably? Don't worryyy! He's got you.

Although, that doesn't mean he does it for free!! He asks for payment via smooches and love. He tends to stray away from period sex until he knows you're comfortable with it, and if you are comfortable with it he's always there to offer his assistance if you need an all natural pain killer ;)

Mother nature fucking sucked. It wasn't enough that you had to deal with blood leaking out of you every month, but debilitating cramps on top of that? Straight bullshit!

You've been cocooned under your blankets all morning, curled up into a fetal position as you delt with the intense cramps. You've already taken the last of the painkillers you kept in your bedside table, and unfortunate for you, they were not working. You know you've certainly missed breakfast by now, but you just hurt too much to get up. You're face down on your pillow when there's a quick knock at your door before it opens.

"Good morning, Chère~" Remy sings. You cant really respond to him other than giving him a tired hum. You hear the door shut behind him before the sound of him placing a plate on your bedside table.

" 'Figured you weren't feeling well when you weren't at the table, so I've brought you the Gambit special." He jokes. You feel the bed shift with his weight as his sits next to you, running his hand up and down your back soothingly.

"Thanks Rem." You mumble. If only you could bring yourself to sit up. You can smell the sweet scent of the beignets he had brought you, and it makes your stomach growl loudly. You wince as another wave of pain hits you coincidentally, and you're absolutely sure your body was planning to kill you.

" S' pretty bad, huh?" Remy asks, a comforting hand brushing the hair out of your face. You nod.

"Alright, c'mere." You don't have a chance to refuse as Remy is sitting you up, making space so he can sit against your headboard. You're blearily blinking your eyes open as he drags you into his lap, propping you up against his chest. You send him a groggy, questioning look, but he only responds with catching you in a chaste kiss.

"What? You didn't think I was gonna let my favorite person suffer alone, did you?" He asks, sending you a smile that you can't help but return. Remy feeds you your breakfast like that, keeping you snug and safe between his arms as he gives you plenty of kisses and rubs your lower stomach through each wave of pain. Those painkiller never did kick in, but at least you had someone sweet to distract you for a while.

[smilesession]

i've been mostly cloistered away from experiencing the "movie theater etiquette is dead" phenomenon because i 1. only see movies at the indie movie theater i work at and havent been to a corporate cinema in years 2. even then i only really see the least popular title screening at any given time and its often just me and my friends and friends of my friends in the room. and frankly sometimes my own friends are a little boorish but its again usually like a 20-person audience watching, like, Plan 9 from Outer Space and doing a little trolling. mostly the worst i experience comes from the fact that i clean the theater and people don't clean up after themselves because they're gross and lazy. everyone knows people are gross and lazy, they've always been so

but we're showing Nosferatu rn and suddenly had to face it: people don't know how the fuck to act. day after opening day, sold out theater, half the theater laughing at every beat. a dozen "what the fuck was funny about that?" moments. man lying still on the ground after vampire attack, and the crowd goes wild. what the fuck was funny about that? women in the row behind me holding a conversation the entire time, just nonstop banal commentary. "oh don't tell me they're gonna end it like that...ok yeah uhuh they did that" type of banal commentary directly beamed into my ear. sooo that just happened! type commentary the entire time unceasing. giggling and chatting on opening weekend of a highly awaited and, for better or for worse, serious movie.

a lot of people have been talking about the Nosferatu crowds being particularly bad and i think it's just a matter of contrast. a dead-serious movie about unstoppable, overwhelming dread and violence and everybody's laughing the whole time. willem dafoe delivers one line in a funny way in it i guess. one guy in front of me did this in an experience-ruining way at The Lighthouse when i saw it in theaters too so it's not a new thing wholly. i just don't get what the issue is or why so many adults are so fucking shamelessly immature. i saw Eyes Wide Shut last night and, again, two people behind me carried on conversation half the time. there are plenty of activities that aren't seeing a movie in public where you can sit and talk the entire time without ruining it for everybody. but i think there's like some kind of decline in theory of mind with people or something. can't fathom that other people are having a sensory, firsthand experience and can hear you, or just a lack of empathy and an assumption that other people's sensory, firsthand experiences don't matter as much as meeting your impulse to say some bullshit outwardly at every waking moment for fear of interiority

[sturnioz]

writing a toxic!chris fic rn and i js can't stop thinking ab toxic!chris who only fakes remorse for saying fucked up shit while irritated over whatever when he has you pleading under him in his bed…

shit like "oh, baby, i was so mean to you earlier, wasn't i? i should be nice and let you cum, huh?"

or toxic!chris who likes to get on your nerves or js drive you crazy with jealousy and calls you beautiful after screaming matches

I NEED IT, i need him so bad 😫

(also hello, i've never sent anything in to you yet, but i love your writing sb 😭)

toxic!chris <3333 i fear he does not give a shit if he hurts your feelings because he knows he can have you feeling good and screaming his name in seconds !! i fear he's also the type to drive you fucking insane and purposefully gets you angry just so can be like;

"he—hey," chris' voice is raised and firm, his eyebrows pulled together as his hand grips your jaw. "who... who the fuck do you think you are speakin' to, huh? watch it, kid... think you can — hey, look at me. think you can scream at me like that when its me who makes you feel good every night? yeah? i can take that shit away so fast. got plenty of other girls linin' up wantin' my dick, baby. you ain't the first and you ain't gonna be the last."

[iwannascreameurekaa]

Percy Jackson fans who refuse to read trials of Apollo kinda piss me off

I've only heard a few reasons on my people don't want to read TOA but most of the reasons are honestly stupid... and bullshit so

! Might have TOA spoilers !

reason one: Lester is annoying

no shit he's Apollo that's his whole character development thing usually when a character starts off bad that means they're going to evolve into a better person that's basic writing

reason two: caleo

valid tbh but really you just gotta Manipulate yourself into believing that Rick was 100% writing them as friends idk

but also they're only in a last part of the first book, the second, and basically no where else

reason three: the one and only Jason Grace scene

did I say spoilers? Cause there's gonna be spoilers here!! So you don't want to read a five book series because one of those books contain the death of a character who you didn't even particularly like until their death? Most of the fanbase disliked or even hated Jason before the burning maze and I see loads of hate towards him today but we're not getting into that rn we're talking about TOA so here's my solution if you don't want to read a characters death scene: don't read any Percy jackson book. There are plenty of people who die during any Riordan book so stop whining about one. If you don't want to read the book that's fine but saying your reason for not reading is because someone dies is stupid. Do I need to name all the people that have died throughought the series?

reason four: Percy's not in the book

It is completely valid if your favorite character is Percy and you want him to show up more but that mf has 5+ books from his pov and is also in multiple other books. He's in four out of five of the hero's of Olympus series he's in the first TOA book he's in Magnus chase too so grow up he's not going to be in every book

I think the only other reason I've seen is that they can't afford to buy the books which is completely valid you're fine

but I think that sums up my little rant

Edit: spelling, added something to the caleo part 👍

[fairysluna]

hi! not sure if you’re receiving request rn but if u are would u do a one shot cregan x targ wife? basically domestic stuff with their kids who’s half wolf and dragon and all the fluff <33 i love ur writing style sm!! don’t forget to take care of urself :)

AMONG DRAGONS AND WOLVES

MASTERLIST

Pairing: Cregan Stark x Targ!Reader.

Summary: Once the time has arrived for your child's dragon egg to hatch, things don't go as planned, and Cregan simply cannot stand the sight of his son's saddened eyes.

Tags/TW: fluff, mentions of pregnancy, cregan being a dilf, and just that I think, it's pure fluff tbh.

Author's Note: THANK U for requesting this, I've been waiting to write something like this since I wrote my first Cregan one shot. Just softie Cregan for you, anon, hope you like it!!🤍

Word Count: 2.0k

"What are you doing here?" He asked, visibly worried as he stood up from the snow leaving the two boys behind, "You should be resting…"

A small chuckle left you as he placed his big hand on top of your swollen belly, you looked down at it for a few seconds before looking up to his face. The love in his eyes was visibly obvious as you felt, once again, bewitched by his deep brown stare. The same butterflies that were present the day of your wedding, were flying in your stomach as you felt his loving touch on you. So protective and caring.

"It's time for Rickon to go to his classes with the Maester," you informed. The older child looked at you with puppy eyes, begging for you to not send him away from his little brother, "go on, pup, he's waiting for you… you can play with Aelor after you've finished."

The brown haired boy stood up from the snow and walked half-hearted towards the castle. Once he passed right beside you, you stopped him to kiss him softly on his forehead before letting him go. As a response, he wrinkled his nose and left obediently. Cregan saw the tender scene with a smile on his face,

"He was comforting his brother," Cregan said, "Aelor needed his company."

"We've talked about this, this is usual, this happens to everyone… My brother, Aemond, went through the same thing and now he rides Vhagar," you shrugged.

"He's ten, he doesn't understand it, he feels unworthy," he turned around to look at him.

Aelor Stark, a beautiful brown haired boy who carries his mother's eyes. The first born son product of your love for Cregan. He was bigger than the other children of his age, and his only friends were his half-brother, Rickon, and his younger sister of five, Lysara.

And while Lysara's egg already hatched, Aelor's hasn't been so lucky to say the same. The poor boy spent the prior night crying on your lap as Cregan looked at you with pure distress in his eyes, knowing that he wasn't able to do anything that could cheer his son up. That same night, you told Aelor that he could claim a dragon of his own once he was old enough… but, as your husband said, his sadness was not only because he didn't have a dragon yet, he felt sad because he felt as if he was unworthy of having one.

"I can't bear to look at his saddened eyes," Cregan said, "he has your eyes, everytime i see sadness in them is as if I'm seeing sadness in yours. I can't allow my family to be miserable."

"We're not, my love," you quickly answered, placing your hand on his cheek, "you have given us nothing but pure happiness. What is happening is beyond our control, is what nature desires."

"We need to do something," he spoke sternly, "I will not sit back and see our son suffer."

You couldn’t help but smile genuinely at his sweet words.

"There's nothing left to do, we just need to wait and take him to King's Landing so he can claim an already hatched dragon… there are plenty of them."

"Is it my fault?" Cregan asked suddenly with a soft voice. You quickly frown, visibly confused.

"Your fault?"

"What if my- my genes are too strong and his Valyrian blood is not working… he already has brown hair, and-"

A chuckle was heard as you stood on your tiptoes to silent him with a soft kiss. He immediately grabbed your waist as he sighed once you captured his lips in a touch that made him forget about everything for just a couple of seconds. That was the power you had on him.

Once you pulled back, Cregan's eyes slowly fluttered open until his eyes met yours. He took a deep breath and you smiled,

"This is not your fault," you said slowly, trying to make him understand, "you're a wise man, husband, it surprises me that you were able to think such a foolish thing."

"I apologize," he muttered, a bit embarrassed.

"No need, my love," you softly shook your head and sighed before pecking his lips, "now, Lysa is asking for her father, she said you promised her to help her with her Valyrian classes."

Cregan smiled embarrassed, a soft tone of pink covered his cheeks as he looked down at the snow beneath his thick boots. You bit your own bottom lip as you let out a breathy laugh, seeing your husband being so flustered was a bit amusing for you.

Especially because you knew you were the only one who was able to make him feel that way.

"She told you, she betrayed our pact,'' he said between soft chuckles.

"I told you it wasn't necessary…"

"I want to be able to teach them, my love. They're my children too, I need to be part of their culture."

"That's very kind of you," your arms wrapped around his waist as you kiss him again.

"You won't be able to gossip about me in another language," he joked between pecks.

"I would never gossip about you, you fool," you laughed.

Cregan placed his hands on your face and took a look at your features for a long time. He would always do that; hold your face between his big hands and stare at your beauty for a few seconds, admiring every single bit of you. He sighed, completely enamored by the view in front of him, and then he gently rubbed his nose against yours, closing his eyes but still being able to perceive your small smile.

"You're the most beautiful woman in the world, my love," he whispers, pressing his forehead in yours, "I love you more than words can tell, my princess."

Your heart, filled with joy, skipped a beat as you heard that nickname that he now uses only in intimate moments like this, for he wanted to let you know how you had all the control of him. You opened your eyes, looking at those gleaming dark eyes that you loved so dearly.

Those tiny little moments made you think about how lucky you were.

Later at night, when the crackling sound of the fireplace was the only thing you were able to hear, you were laying in bed with Aelor under one arm and Lysara kissing and caressing your belly as she spoke to her new sibling growing inside of you. You looked at the scene, with tender eyes and a giant smile decorating your face.

"Sagon gīda, zaldrītsos," Be careful, little dragon, you told her gently, caressing her curly brown hair, "Your little brother or sister is too small yet, so you have to be careful, okay?"

"I hope is a girl…" Aelor whispered on your side. You turned to look at him, asking him to explain his answer, "maybe she'll be able to have a dragon if she's a girl like Lysa."

You pressed your lips in a thin line as you cupped your son's face and caressed his chubby cheeks. A soft kiss was left on his forehead as you shook your head,

"Listen to me, zoklītsos." Little wolf, you called him, "gender has nothing to do with it, and you will have a dragon."

"But-"

"In a few months we'll visit your grandmother, and once we're in the capital we'll go to the Dragon Keep, where you will choose a dragon to claim," you spoke softly, but sternly at the same time, "so, just be patient and wait."

"I'm sorry, muña," he said before he cuddles under your arm once again.

"No need to-"

Your words were interrupted as the door suddenly opened with a deafening sound as it smacked against the wall. Your first instinct was to grab Lysara and Aelor, and place them behind you as you grab your small dagger from under your pillow.

However, your body relaxed once you saw Rickon entering the room with a suspicious big smile and laughing as he covered his mouth. You took a deep breath and you hid the dagger under the pillow once again.

"Rickon, darling, you scared me," you said, scolding him but keeping your voice as soft as you could, "what is it that has you so cheerfully laughing, huh?"

"We have a surprise for Aelor!" He said happily.

"We?" You asked.

Cregan walked inside the room as soon as those words left your mouth, and your eyes widened as you looked at the half grown direwolf between his arms. It looked quite small in them.

Your husband had the same smile as the one his first child had, two pairs of eyes gleaming with excitement as they looked at your eldest son. Soon you realized what was going on, and a horror look was seen in your face as you grabbed Lysara and held her close to your body.

"Absolutely not!" You said, trying to grab Aelor too but he already stood up from the bed, "Aelor!" You scolded him.

"What is this?!" The small child asked as he caressed the soft fur of the wolf.

"Your new pet, my boy," Cregan said, kneeling so Aelor was at the same height as the animal.

"Cregan?" You asked, confused and astonished, "mind to explain what is the meaning of this?"

You stood up from the bed, your daughter hanging from your arms as you walked back, far from the animal that started to move its ears each time Aelor would touch its belly.

Cregan left the wolf on the floor and walked towards you, removing the girl from your arms and holding her in his instead.

"Be careful, my love," he warned you, "you cannot strain yourself, not with our little pup growing inside you."

"Cregan, what is this?" You asked again, yelping as the wolf started to howl.

He laughed softly, "my love, you ride a dragon, how can you be scared of a wolf?"

"I'm a Targaryen, we bond with our dragons, they would never harm us."

"Starks bond with direwolves, love…" he explained softly, "Look at them, they already love each other and they've just met."

You looked at your son as the wolf licked his cheek and he laughed gleefully. Rickon was looking at them with excitement, for now he had another thing in common with his little brother. Your heart lighted up after seeing Aelor smiling like that after days of only seeing saddened eyes on him. That mere thought softened your heart, and made you sigh.

"Cregan…"

"Listen, I will take care of everything, okay?" He said, grabbing your hand and kissing it gently, "And I assure you, my love, nothing will happen to you because I will always be here to protect you."

"Whose idea was to get this… thing?"

"Uh… mine," he muttered, smiling shyly, "I told you I had to do something about it, I can't bear to see my family being miserable."

Your haze softened at his words; you were Cregan's weakness but he was certainly yours too. The only one that can make you bend.

"Alright, he can keep his pet, but it will stay away from me," you warned, "I don't want that thing being close to me, I feel that it will chew my face off."

Cregan only laughed at your words before kissing your lips.

Aelor stood up from the floor and ran towards Cregan, hugging him tightly as he cheerfully yelled, "thank you, kepa! thank you!"

You would've looked at the tender scene being displayed in front of you, but your eyes were fixed on the animal sitting on the carpet. The wolf made eye contact with you, and tilted its head as it sighed. With your lips pressed in a thin line, you heard at your daughter saying,

"Can I have one too, kepa?"

With widened eyes you looked at your daughter, seeing how her eyes shone with the sight of the direwolf just a few meters away from you.

"Oh, Gods…" you muttered, caressing your belly.

You started to beg for the next one to claim a dragon instead of a frightening wolf.

[rs-hawk]

ok. Here’s a screwball idea. I don’t care if you don’t do it or even ask, but it’s here.

This thing is a Venus figurine. Many people tie them to being symbols of fertility due to their exaggerated, chubby proportions, and a lack of a face (kinda looks like they’re wearing vases). Because these things were made like in the Upper Palaeolithic era, and since society was a lot different back then (clearly), many people speculate that they could represent healthy or fertile women, goddesses, or simply self-portraits by their own makers.

from the way I see it, a Venus figurine represents a healthy woman very much capable of loving and having kids regardless of her appearance (lack of facial features), so the idea is simplified to this:

Fucking a life-sized Venus figurine who only wants to love, and be loved.

and now it’s done. This was most likely a fat waste of my time.

Friendly reminder that I'm an Anthropology major. When I tell you I fucking love Venus- Lord. I'm basically vibrating rn. I can't wait to drop nerd shit in this post. More asks like this I'm BEGGING. Prehistoric is my second area of interest! Pre-Colombian Americas is my main. I will go feral every time I get an ask like this. I’m not a fan of the almost self deprecating way you asked it, but I like it so-

Come to Life Venus of Willendorf x College Student Cis Male! Reader

"You know, some say that instead of a fertility Goddess, this is just a self portrait of some random woman. Like, look at her hips. That's how they'd look if she was looking down at herself while carving, you know?" you gushed, marveling at the small statue as you and your friend crowded around it. The velvet ropes stopped you from getting too close, but the statue was almost magnetic.

“Imagine being this chick and knowing dudes for centuries have used you to jerk off,” your friend snickered, side eyeing you.

"Come on dude. Do you really have to talk about her like that?" you scoffed, hating the idea of anyone else using her to get off. There was an aching in your cock that you couldn’t explain. Admittedly, you felt a little embarrassed about it. It was just a statue, but there was something about it.

“ ‘Her’?” he repeated, grinning teasingly at you. “So sorry I insulted her. Is she going to be upset with me?”

Rolling your eyes, you drew them away from the statue. “Whatever. Let’s go check the rest of the museum. I’m sure there’s plenty of other things from the Paleo that we missed.”

“You’re not going to write your essay about your wife?” your friend gasped, putting his hand to his chest with mock shock. “She’s going to be so hurt!”

Rolling your eyes again, you waved him on, though you did spare another glance at the statue. After the museum trip, you found yourself coming back to the museum again. And again. And again. And again. You were there nearly every day. When no one was around, you started praying to the small statue, whispering wants to her. How you wished you could have held her. How often you thought of her. Sure, it still made you feel a bit silly with how often your cock ached when you thought of her, but who would a statue tell?

The next morning, you woke up early. Much earlier than usual. Despite that, you couldn’t fall back asleep, so you began your morning routine. When you made your way to the living room to head to the kitchen, you stopped in your tracks. Sitting on your couch was… Venus?

“What?” you frowned, thinking maybe you were still asleep. This had to be a dream.

Her head turned, Her braids moving just enough for you to see a glimpse of facial features, but they seemed scattered. Not quite right. Then they were gone completely. You stood frozen. Rooted to where you stood.

“I came to pay a visit to my most dedicated worshipper,” She said in a voice that sounded the way a first kiss felt.

The way She spoke, you were certain she was smiling, if She could. She gestured for you to come sit beside her, which you did. Your head was spinning. Was this even real? You couldn’t help it when your gaze roamed Her bare body. Everything about Her was so perfect that you felt like touching Her would be like defiling a holy place.

As a thousand thoughts ran through your mind, She cut them all off by placing one hand on your thigh, the other tilting your chin so you had to look down at Her chest. You swallowed hard, your cock already aching. How would She feel wrapped around you?

The two of you didn’t speak for several moments. You wanted so badly to touch Her, but you still struggled with the idea. She, however, seemed to have no such reservations. She pulled down your pajama pants, running Her firm palm over the bulge in your boxers. A low groan escaped your lips. That was the end of your hesitation.

You stood up, kicking the pants off from around your ankles, quickly taking off your boxers as well. She chuckled slightly, though She seemed intrigued when you got on your knees in front of Her, lightly pushing Her plush thighs apart. You worshipped Her cunt just as well as She knew you would.

Your tongue lapped at Her, Her thick thighs and the overlap of her tummy nearly suffocating you. The coolness of Her core made you almost desperate to make Her cum and taste it on your tongue. She tasted like saltwater and copper, and all but Her majestic cunt and thighs seemed to still be primarily stone. All you wanted was to make Her happy. All you wanted was to continue to worship Her.

She moaned as you slid a finger into Her dripping pussy, moving your mouth to dutifully suck on Her clit. The metal decorations on Her braids clinked together when She threw Her head back, letting you see the curve of Her throat. A Goddess’ blessing. Or maybe the sounds were of the metal decorations hitting against the stone like braids themselves. Your other hand snaked between your legs, pumping your aching cock in time with how you were fingering Her. It only took a few minutes for Her to cum on your tongue, much to your satisfaction.

“What a skillful worshipper I have,” She nearly purred, pulling you up by placing Her hand under your chin.

She laid on Her back, spreading Her legs for you. In seconds, you sank into Her. Your thrusts were not rhythmic, but She didn’t seem to care, moaning and arching Her hips up to meet you. Your mouth found one of Her large nipples, taking it into your mouth as you softly groped Her other breast, your stomach and chest pressed against Hers. The softness and squish of Her stomach making it easier for you to adjust as you slammed into Her. It surprised you as Her limbs and head seemed to be solid stone. Maybe She could control it at will, but you didn’t have much time to ponder it. Not with how She was pulsing around you.

When you finally came, you didn’t even try to pull out. Why would a Goddess of fertility want you to? The two of you were panting together as your seed spilt deep inside of Her.

“I think I’m going to stay with you,” She whispered in your ear, the coolness of the metal loops sending a shiver down your spine.

“Please do,” was all you could get out, your mind back to reeling.

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[unbidden-yidden-deactivated20240]

Ok so I can't screenshot so I'm putting this in the asks but people are talking about netanyahu because he's getting the attention right now. And that's because he's genociding Gaza right now and nothing else of that scale happened since. So of course he's the it girl rn.

Like I wholeheartedly agree with you, we shouldn't be saying people "deserve to die", I just want to point out that I don't like it whenever people go "but why are people talking about this figure (who's getting all the attention right now) and not these other figures? (Who aren't getting attention)"

But TLDR netanyahu's doing some fuck shit that's getting reported on so obviously he's getting talked about the most generally.

To bring it back to the original conversation, people were talking about Putin when the Russo Ukraine war was going on. I saw people get excited at the idea that he might have cancer when that lump on his face showed up. Putin was the it girl and now it's netanyahu.

Look I'm sure you don't mean it this way, but the original comment I was responding to was antisemitic and your comments excusing it are microaggressions.

[Original post for reference]

There are a few things going on here:

1. People are giving a hugely disproportionate amount of attention to Israel's military response to the October 7th massacre in Gaza because they are antisemitic. There have been plenty of humanitarian crises affecting Palestinians in Jordan, Lebanon, Syria, and Egypt, yet the world literally only cares about them if they can use it as a cudgel against Jews. Obviously it's a humanitarian crisis and it deserves attention, and Israel deserves scrutiny and accountability for its actions. But the laser focus on Israel and only Israel belies the true motivation.

2. There are numerous other humanitarian crises happening right now that affect substantially more people, and which are unquestionably genocide. Can you name them? Can you tell me the relevant major players by name? Can you tell me the number of people murdered? Why or why not?

3. Specifically naming Bibi out of every possible vile human one could name, to me, specifically, a Jew - that's extra sus. Taken in combination with the previous points? Yeah, it's antisemitic.

4. The genocide of Ukraine by Russia is still ongoing, and ignorance about it is leading to dwindling support to such an extent that Ukrainians are having to ration bullets to defend themselves with. This one isn't meant as a scold, by the way — the plight of Ukraine is getting intentionally buried. Please don't stop talking about Ukraine, they need all the help they can get.

[And in b4 someone thinks I'm trying to say you shouldn't pay attention to what is happening in Gaza: please DO keep paying attention to Gaza and keep holding Bibi's feet to the fire. He's awful, his policies are awful, and he's encouraging the absolute worst members of Israeli society for his own selfish reasons. The people of Gaza are going through hell and need our help. Just please, for the love of G-d fact check things first and make sure you're not "supporting Palestine" by being antisemitic. Also make sure you are holding Hamas responsible for its part in the humanitarian crisis.]