#and then the same ones work to convince you of conspiracy theories?

[mcflymemes]

NATIONAL TREASURE (2004) PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue from the film, adjust as necessary

i'm gonna steal it.

who wants to go down the creepy tunnel inside the tomb first?

if it's any consolation, you had me convinced.

you're not hurt, are you?

i am so getting fired for this.

is there a question in there?

we have no money.

how about a bribe?

it was cool. you should try it sometime.

we can't go back there.

i've never been so happy to be proven wrong.

you handled that well.

are you trying to steal that?

it's thirty-five dollars.

you know the key to running a convincing bluff? every once in a while you've got to be holding all the cards.

stop talking. start the van.

you're treasure hunters, aren't you?

i'm still working on it.

why don't you just come back down here and we can talk through this together.

don't speak again.

is that the hot girl?

are you with me?

what do you think? i'm a hostage.

do you trust me?

once we catch them, what do we do?

is this real?

i made something for you.

tell me what i need to know.

just another clue.

i can explain, but i don't have time.

i wasted 20 years of my life, and now you've destroyed yours.

what was the secret?

i found something!

i broke a shoelace this morning.

it can't be done.

i understand your bitterness. i really do.

i want you to have a chance to do that.

i've got some duct tape in the back.

promise you won't be any trouble.

i finally figured it out.

the treasure is a myth.

we need more juice.

you're all lunatics!

still a little on edge from being shot at, but i'll be okay. thanks for asking.

see? okay? now could you please stop shouting?

give me that!

you would do well, [name], to be a little more civilized in this instance.

who were those men?

we did the only thing we could do to keep it safe.

we probably deserved that.

i was thinking, what if we go public? plaster the story all over the internet.

it's not like we have our reputations to worry about.

people don't talk that way anymore.

beautiful, huh?

i have no idea what you said.

if there's something wrong, those who have the ability to take action have the responsibility to take action.

what do you see?

what time is it now?

we missed it.

i know something about history that you don't.

i'd be very excited to learn about it.

hold on one second. let me just take in this moment.

this is cool. is this how you feel all the time?

[name], you're a genius.

how do a bunch of guys with hand tools build all this?

the aliens helped them.

i volunteered.

it's invisible.

i'm sorry for your suffering.

when are we gonna get there?

i'm hungry. this car smells weird.

i'm so sorry i dropped you.

i would have done exactly the same to you.

why can't they just say "go to this place, here's the treasure, spend it wisely?"

anyone crazy enough to believe us isn't gonna want to help.

we don't need someone crazy.

[name], are you crying?

look. stairs.

i'm guessing that's significant.

i'm just trying to hide from my ex-husband.

stay as long as you like.

you want something?

i see what you left him.

this isn't a day for "um."

we didn't find the information credible.

well, this might be possible.

i leveled with you one hundred percent.

everything i told you was the truth.

it's not a conspiracy theory.

you know what? i take it back.

i'm in a little trouble.

this... is huge.

you are gonna go to prison. you know that, right?

that would bother most people.

you know what you have to do.

i'm just trying to think if there's anything else we could do.

i'm not letting it out of my sight.

how do you look?

a toast to high treason.

here's to the men who did what was considered wrong in order to do what they knew was right.

why do you need them?

look... this is a waste of time.

i'm still not against you.

i really couldn't accept something like this normally.

we don't actually have it.

did bigfoot take it?

is there a door that doesn't lead to prison?

get out of there. get out of there now!

[name], can you hear me?

can i marry your brain?

our evil plan is working.

why does that never happen to me?

meet me at the car. call me if you have any problems.

no broken bones?

a jump like that could kill a man.

[thecutepoison]

This is very speculative, but I'm suspecting Kipperlily is using the Ethereal Plane to spy on the Bad Kids and if I'm right I might have figured how she got found out by the rogue teacher!

First, let me explain my paranoid thoughts about the spying. Since ep 3, we are aware that Kipperlily is hearing their conversations, even if we don't know for sure the extent of it. She, just like Riz, must have a crazy stealth modifier + reliable talent, however I don't think she's relying only on that.

So, there's a scene in ep 4 when the Bad Kids roll for perception to spot Kipperlily. Kristen casts See Invisibility and Fabian rolls a nat 20. Brennan describes, only to Fabian, that although he doesn't see Kipperlily, he feels the "twinge of some kind of sense". Very creepy. That implies that she's there but cannot be seen. She could be invisible, however I don't think that's the case because an invisible person could still be perceived through hearing or touch. Also, Kristen would have been able to see her because of the spell.

With that in mind, the paranoid goblin that lives inside my brain is convinced that she's using the Ethereal Plane to spy on the Bad Kids. The Border Ethereal is perfect for infiltration and spywork, since you pass through physical objects and watch everything in the material plane without ppl there perceiving you. There are a couple of ways to access the Ethereal Plane, with spells or items, but I have no ideia abt the specific method she might be using.

Her being in the ethereal plane explains why Fabian, with his nat 20, didn't notice any physical indicatives of Kipperlily but still felt a presence, like some sixth sense. Now, Adaine did use her Third Eye so she could see into the Ethereal Plane within 60 feet and still saw nothing. But that doesn't mean that Kipperlily isn't there since there's a very easy way to circumvent Adaine: Non detection. This is a third level spell that hides the target from divination magic - for 8 hours they "can’t be targeted by any divination magic or perceived through magical scrying sensors". The Rat Grinders, long time haters of the Bad Kids, are for sure aware that Adaine is a divination wizard, they would be fools to spy on the party without casting Non Detection first. She's the motherfucking elven oracle!

Okay, now about the rogue teacher. In ep 3, Siobhan theorizes the rogue professor is the ghost teacher. I think she's absolutely right! We know most teachers of Aguefort and even if the ghost one was among those we havent seen, the Bad Kids would probably have heard about them if they were teaching something like ranger class. It's plausible that the reason for the party having no ideia who they are and not even passing by them in the halls is that the ghost is the rogue professor. After all, no one knows who the hell they are, it's the whole point of their teaching method. And for a ghost it would be really easy to go undetected since they can travel through the Ethereal Plane, beside the insane stealth.

Indulge my conspiracy theories for a minute. Rogue professor = Ghost Teacher and Kipperlily can wander in the Ethereal Plane, the plane of ghosts. Even with the advantage of being on the same plane as the teacher, it would still be a nightmare to find them since they are a pro rogue. In fact, Kipperlily didn't achive that: the rogue teacher found her.

But how did she manage to have the professor find her? I'm sure it wasn't an accident, she's too calculating for that. So, I started thinking about what would I do in her place and came up with the stupidest ideia. It's utterly ridiculous. But it could totally work and the strategy seems kinda Kipperlily's style.

Remember the Ghost Steak? The one Fig tried to eat when she invaded the teacher's lounge in season one? It's the ghost teacher's lunch, and Brennan reestablished its existence in ep 3 when Adaine used Ethereal Sight, explaining that the school wards are porous enough to allow ethereal travel and other stuff.

So if I was Kipperlily, my dumbass plan would go as follows: invade the teacher's lounge through the ethereal plane and hide inside the fridge. It wouldn't be a problem for me since I'm intangible and can pass through stuff, plus the other professors wouldn't see me even if they opened the fridge. Inside, I wait as long as needed, until the Rogue/Ghost Teacher gets hungry. They finally open the fridge to grab their snack, only to find me looking at them from inside the fridge like a lunatic. Mission complete: got found by the rogue teacher and aced junior year!

It's so mundane and stupid and that makes me more convinced that's exactly what happened. It's too funny to not be true.

[formulatrash]

from following you on twitter im absolutely certain you have (far more informed than mine) thoughts on whatever the fuck williams is doing. very interested in hearing them, if you’d care to share?

so like, from the off: I have always been a Logan Sargeant defender. people who didn't follow his junior career just saw an American, assumed he was a pay driver and didn't check any further. the guy had a better karting career than Oscar, was competitive with him the whole time they were in the same series - they were the George and Alex of their day.

sometimes those drivers fall off. Jack Aitken was, in fact, George's main rival up to F2 and then got mechachromed (or technically hewlanded) out of the running for more than a guest spot. but Logan didn't - he just ran out of money. that year in a Charouz (a backmarking F3 team struggling to score points) was when he really proved himself, especially on being solid at development and leading a team.

that was what convinced Carlin (at the time, not putting in the best showing in F2) he was worth it. and his time at Carlin was what convinced Williams. not money. Logan never had sponsors pulling the strings for him. he knew he might well not get to F1 so had already started experimenting with prototype racing, which he was good in. man was being pragmatic about how to have a career in Europe if things didn't all shake out right.

but they did (sort of) and he got the Williams seat. he was probably one of the least-prepared drivers for quite a long time, with close to zero F1 testing prior to, err, F1 preseason testing. the Williams driver academy, at the time he was in it, amounted to pretty much a gym membership. a pass for the factory canteen and some branded sweaters to wear rather than some structured programme and he'd only had one year in F2.

we know the Williams is not like, the best car. the team has had Some Issues and despite the investment from Dorilton, is still rebuilding pretty heavily. I mean remember it was (in 2023) five seasons previous that they turned up to testing like whoops, no car. our bad.

then in 2022 they had Jost Capito and FX Demaison living in a weird student flatshare while they tried to work out what the hell was going on in the team, only to both leave prior to 2023. at which point James Vowles turns up and goes my god you're running this whole team via a spreadsheet. truly, we (a team whose history includes the owner's wife, who was actually the owner, locking up the factory and telling the bailiffs to fuck off every other week for years) were so fucking back.

(if you want to read a really, really, really good book about F1 then Williams: A different kind of life is exceptional)

so yeah it's a bit of a Charouz of a seat but then Logan's flourished in that circumstance before. except you're going up against a guy whose only second-fiddle circumstance was against Max fucking Verstappen. you're an underprepared rookie and you're against someone who did at times hold his own against Max Verstappen, even as an underprepared rookie himself and he's been in the team for a year already, leading all the direction and development. fucking yikes. that's not a low-pressure seat where you're both just hoping things might work out.

saying all that because: I think Logan was given an incredibly tough gig. that doesn't mean he shouldn't or couldn't have risen to it. but that Williams seat wasn't an easy ride in his first year, where he showed he could improve when he gained momentum and confidence, something that's massively important. when things turn against you and keep turning against you, it's incredibly hard to reverse that in motorsport - just look at Daniel Ricciardo at McLaren.

and yes I know there's a lot of mad conspiracy theories that for some reason the team would want to lose points in the constructors' for the express reason of humiliating a driver they were paying an obscene amount but please let's be realistic: McL really badly wanted that one to work out. and Williams seemed to, too, in Logan's first year. they weren't babying him and he had clear targets and goals but there was a desire to see that work out for both of them.

this year that, uh. hasn't seemed to be there. I know, I absolutely know, why James Vowles felt taking Logan's car and giving it to Alex in Australia was the right thing to do. Alex had scored a point there the previous year, although it's historically not been a great track for him. that point could be the difference between 9th and 10th in the constructors - millions of dollars.

but if you want to absolutely implode your driver's brain and publicly announce you have no confidence in him then that's certainly a good way to go about it. and the thing is Australia is one race whereas Logan was supposed to be in that car for the rest of the season.

it's hard to underestimate just how much F1 teams are swayed by the media. Nyck de Vries is an incredible recent example: yes, he scored points in that Williams weekend but in the same year he was driving like absolute shit in Formula E. probably because he was so focussed on F1 but any FE journalist could have told you the guy was not, in fact, the second coming of Senna - extremely likeable, weird, idiosyncratic and actually fun to watch but far from performing at his own best let alone anyone else's.

so when he was hyped to high heaven as about to wipe the floor with Yuki there was widespread eyebrow-raising from a paddock no one in F1 cares to look at. but teams bought into it, fought over him. in a matter of races the media turned on him, shredded him and Red Bull shrugged, said they never liked him in the first place and binned him off after, realistically, exactly the performances you could have expected him to put in.

the media has never been very kind to Logan. he is a little shy, he is quite softly spoken, he doesn't go for bragadaccio and he's not particularly goofy. he doesn't insist on pointing out he's there on merit. he's quite careful with what he says, guarded. he does not like things to get weird and with the motorsport media, things so often do.

trepidation about his F2 record from people who barely tune into the races being broadcast in the media centre they're in raised questions before he was in F1. Williams' re-signing of him was deemed a bit controversial, perhaps proof the team was soft. yeeting him from his car was proof they were hard enough, in fact, that rending confidence from your driver like flesh torn off a bone is somehow a useful function of the sport, from people who a mildly critical comment would send into a 5-day spiral.

(I would know)

Logan has not performed poorly this year. he hasn't performed as well as Alex but Alex has been throwing together Lando-grade drives, as you'd probably expect given the pair of them have (close to) equal experience in F1 or at least the same number of years chewing through the gristle of it.

(why am I using so many visceral meat metaphors? perhaps 3am is not the time to write anything)

all things considered, the fact that Logan did not dissolve into a puddle of goo after Australia is commendable. he has also outqualified a fucking Red Bull multiple times. he has crashed a bit, yes, because that's what driving on the edge with an air of desperation starts to look like - when Charles did it (really a lot more) in 2020 no one thought it was because he had run out of talent.

Logan has not been driving the same car as Alex. Alex himself has confirmed this. that's, uhm, fucking dire if you're trying to fix things in the simulator because that will be correlated to the upgraded car, which is what the team is interested in. even if they load yours back in, the correlation will be steadily migrating away and they won't be too interested in what it's telling them because it's the old car.

to say that Williams lost interest in Logan early this season would be an understatement. they spent a huge amount of effort and got back a bunch of world champions to film an hour-long feature with Logan's sponsor and him. it got mentioned, like, twice? because it came out the same week Alex got re-signed.

I'm not saying re-signing Alex Albon isn't exciting. hell, I'd be very excited. but that was probably the moment I knew this was going to get horrendously messy.

James Vowles is a charming man who has lots of likeable qualities. he is first and foremost an engineer and looks for engineering solutions, something he was very able to translate to strategy. he is, however, not used to being a figurehead for an organisation.

do I think the public way JV conducted the search for Logan's replacement was fair on the team, any of the drivers involved or, especially, Logan? absolutely fucking not. made all of them look like they were taking turns in a fake taxi that instead turning into a sexy thing was a clown car with JV dressed as the Joker.

I don't honestly know how Logan kept turning up and driving through that. it's one thing to believe you can do something, anything, to prove yourself and another to know you just: can't. there's nothing left you can do. there are no other seats on the grid. time to start talking to teams in other series except if you do that someone will hear about it and then you'll be even more undermined.

I think that, when he looks back, James will realise he fucked this very badly. he obviously wants to do what's best for the team and is overruling quite a lot of sensible interpersonal stuff to do that and particularly how he should act with the media which, again, not something he's had such exposure to despite his long F1 career.

Logan Sargeant has, like his car last weekend, burned in a pyrrhic symbol of what Williams want to exorcise from their team. they want to stop losing.

but like James was saying at the start of the season, before the rush of chasing new drivers caught him up, the main problem is they need to fix the car. Franco Colapinto will not do that. he is a perfectly good stopgap replacement for someone who, yes, has probably now reached a mindset where it is perhaps kinder to not expect him to drive an F1 car.

but it will probably be more telling when Carlos Sainz Jnr is also just a driver, unless the team pulls miracles over the winter.

[creature-wizard]

What's up with the Satanic Panic, in a nutshell.

Around the 1970's, conservative Evangelicals began weaponizing a number of conspiracy theories against anyone who wasn't a conservative Evangelical. These conspiracy theories were essentially repackaged witch hysteria (IE, the conspiracies pushed by early modern witch hunters) and antisemitism (especially blood libel).

The core conspiracy theory was that a global satanic cult was working behind the scenes to manipulate politics and lead people away from Jesus. The exact practices of the cult depended on who you asked, but common allegations were practicing human sacrifice (including plenty of child sacrifice), drinking human blood, engaging in sex slavery, producing CSE and snuff films, doing drugs, and having orgies.

Numerous people stepped forward claiming to have been either former cult members, or cult survivors. Pretty much all of their accounts are full of blatant absurdities, and anytime someone was actually investigated, pretty much all of their claims fell apart. For example, Mike Warnke, one of the earliest self-proclaimed ex-satanists, was found to have made up his entire story. One woman, Lauren Stratford, was not only revealed to be a fraud, but afterward claimed she was a Holocaust survivor to collect benefits.

Some examples of claims made by people who claimed to be ex-members/survivors include:

Neopaganism was created by the global satanic cult, and Aleister Crowley was their main agent in this.

All neopaganism and modern witchcraft is a slippery slope to human sacrifice and "hardcore satanism."

All media that depicts magic or the supernatural in any way is part of the satanic agenda. Yes, literally all of it. Yes, even that.

Homosexuality is part of the global satanic agenda.

Rock and heavy metal music are part of the global satanic agenda.

Fluoride, artificial sweeteners, and various food additives are actually mind control drugs.

Electromagnetic waves are used to control people's thoughts.

Marxism was created by the global satanic agenda.

If you know anything about QAnon conspiracy theories, you might notice that some of these look awfully familiar. This is because QAnon was another manifestation of Satanic Panic. They updated "electromagnetic waves" to 5G, and largely replaced homosexuality with transgender, but it's the same thing.

The conspiracy theory about cultists creating mind controlled slaves by inducing dissociative identity disorder through torture (all that Project Monarch stuff) is purely a product of the Satanic Panic. People's supposed "memories" of this abuse were generally produced via recovered memory therapy, which is now known to be more effective at implanting memories rather than recovering them. No serious investigations ever produced any evidence of the supposedly widespread and incredibly elaborate torture of tens of thousands of children.

Now, there have been actual isolated cases of what might be considered satanic ritual abuse. But they do not constitute evidence of a global satanic conspiracy. Rather, they constitute evidence that the perpetrators were inspired by the conspiracy theory.

Additionally, they had a very pseudoscientific view of DID, and the horrible practices allegedly used to induce it and create mind controlled alters were pure pseudoscience, as were the alleged symptoms that someone might be a victim of satanic ritual abuse and just didn't remember it. Everything from autism to having conflicted feelings about your abuser to liking BDSM could be construed as a sign that you had been ritually abused. With a bunch of therapists fully convinced that thousands of people had been ritually abused and armed with hypnotic techniques that allowed them to implant memories of abuse, you can see where things could turn messy in a hurry.

Those who claimed to be former satanists/SRA victims were extremely clear in their assertions that this global satanic conspiracy really did exist, and that the only way to escape and stay safe from it was to accept Jesus. Tales of demonic attacks that could only be stopped by the power of Jesus were common, as were other claims of grandiose supernatural power.

In short, the Satanic Panic was - and still is - a means of demonizing anyone who isn't a fundagelical Christofascist, and scaring anyone who already is, into remaining such. Many of the conspiracy theories have made their way into supposedly progressive circles, so you'll occasionally come across the Project Monarch stuff in DID communities, or see pro-LGBTQ people subscribing to conspiracy theories about the wealthy elite drinking blood or adrenochrome.

But make no mistake, there is no "grain of truth" to these allegations of a global satanic conspiracy. There was no "time before all of this was corrupted by evil agendas." It was all created by people with with hateful agendas, and continues to be perpetuated by people with hateful agendas. And that's all, folks.

[innuendostudios]

oh lookie another bite-sized Alt-Right Playbook. back me on Patreon plz.

transcript below the thingy.

Say, for the sake of argument, you’re twelve or thirteen, it’s the mid-90’s, you’re sitting across the table from your conservative aunt at a family reunion. (This aunt will, a decade from now, become a Tea Partier.) You have - you sweet, innocent child - brought up the subject of evolution, being too young to know it’s politicized, and your aunt has not taken well to it. She goes on one of her classic tirades, dismissing the very concept of evolution as patently ridiculous, dropping a quote that will stick with you for ages: “You can’t get snakes from chicken eggs.” And you do your best to explain, with your limited knowledge-base, that, yeah, you can only get a snake from a snake egg, but that snake is going to be a little different from its parents, and the next snake will be a little different from its parents, and you multiply that by a few million generations and you might have something very different from that original snake. Maybe something with legs, or that can breath underwater, or see better in the dark!

And your aunt stares you dead in the windows of your soul and repeats, “You Can’t Get Snakes From Chicken Eggs.”

This is an ego-saving maneuver in which a complex truth is rejected in favor of simplicity. Your aunt has a statement that is true, though non sequitur to the argument at hand. And, after your explanation of how genetics work on long timelines, she repeats her original statement to herself and it still feels true. It’s the belief that the truth is easily recognized, and that it’s always simple, because the world is simple, and, if you can’t explain it to me like I’m five, then you’re probably wrong or making things up.

This heuristic very hard to argue with. You’ve heard that same aunt claim the hole in the ozone layer is caused by sunspots. Now, we’ve talked about the memetic power of statements that are short, quippy, and wrong, and this is a fine example. You might feel the correct response is a statement that is short, quippy, and correct, but here’s the conundrum: the truth is “the hole in the ozone layer is caused by chlorofluorocarbons.” Not only is that a more complex sentence, it’s a more complex idea. If the ozone hole is caused by sunspots, then it’s probably been happening for billions of years, it’s not caused by humans, and we don’t have to do anything about it. It’s reassuring, and tells folks all they care to know without further questions. But the truth of how aerosols deplete ozone is more complex, not least because, even without knowing the science of it, it implies it’s a problem we should do something about.

Ultraviolet light makes CFCs release chlorine into the stratosphere, where it bonds with ozone, converting it into oxygen and chlorine monoxide, neither of which do what ozone does to protect us from the sun. There may be people who can explain that more simply than I just did, but there’s a floor to how simple the truth can be and still be the truth. Falsehoods don’t have that. There is no limit on how simple an idea can be when it doesn’t have to conform to reality.

You play the game of “who’s got the simplest argument,” liars win every time. You can’t get much simpler than “sunspots.” But if you can convince people that the world is complex, then simplistic explanations, across the board, become suspect. It might be too late to do that with your aunt, but maybe there’s still hope for your cousins.

If you’re wondering what they do when confronted with something they cannot deny is complicated: well, that’s your fault. You, or someone like you, took their simple world and overcomplicated it. All the conspiracy theories and fingerpointing and screenshots they’ve squiggled over in MS Paint, all of that is the story of how you overcomplicated the world; it fills in the gap between the simplicity of the world they believe in and the unambiguous complexity of the one in which we live. And, yes, that story is at least as complex as the truth you’re trying to tell them, and, no, it doesn’t make any sense, but that’s a detail. Because the moral of that story is incredibly simple: it is this way because some people made it this way, and all they have to do is take the power back from those people and things can be simple again. This is their version of “a wizard did it.”

[nicomoon69]

so in my spider! Bernard AU I’m slightly changing up his character so here’s basics on Bernard:

- Bernard is still into cooking and it started years back purely because he didn’t trust the food industry. that meant he spent ages learning how to cook and figuring out how to make a lot of popular food items. he has a little list of companies he trusts and doesn’t. he doesn’t want to open a restaurant anymore/become a chef, more so being interested in keeping himself and others healthy

- Bernard knows a freaky amount of things he probably shouldn’t but masks knowing said knowledge with his conspiracy theories (he only believes in like half of them) so to most people he’s just a crazy guy saying crazy things. he still ends up being on a few watchlists so he tries to throw those off by also being a conspiracist online (he also truly enjoys it, but that’s an added bonus)

- Bernard’s actually really smart but due to above as well as a lack of giving a shit about school material (he prefers scientific what ifs and weapon/super hero/vigilante stuff) so he ended up not being able to get into the courses he would’ve preferred due to his mostly average grades. it’s why he’s now double majoring in physics and biology in hopes of getting to do a masters in something closer to that (also a bit of pressure from his parents)

- Bernard has had suit designs for himself and other vigilantes just lying around (which is also how he got a pretty functional suit in a pretty short amount of time). it was mostly a hobby where he’d think about what if scenarios

- Bernard when possible does everything on paper, since he doesn’t trust the government and other big corporations. it’s why his empty apartment has stacks of paper laying around (all neatly categorized and sealed, but it looks like a mess to anyone else)

- kinda in the same vein as the last one but Bernard has most of his money in cash, only having what is absolutely necessary on his bank account. he also claims it saves him money since he can’t just freely spend money with a tap of his card (it’s kind of true since when he had to spend money for his suit he actually had most of it lying around)

- Bernard had a short phase in high school that had him convinced he needed to learn russian so he can now speak a bit of russian, but most importantly he can do the accent really well. it’s what he used as spiderman to throw people off of his identity (it gives Tim a genuine headache)

- Bernard works a part time job at a restaurant as an assistant chef (he needs to buy groceries and pay rent after all). it’s a little italian diner a few blocks from his apartment. he always get leftovers and food that’s about to spoil to reduce their waste

I don’t know if I missed anything important, but this is basically going to be my characterization on him! if you have any suggestions or can point to canon that directly conflicts with these ideas pls lmk! I’m always up to revise my stuff :)

[sadquickchristmassnowman]

hey so i’m new to the community fandom and i really love trobed. i was wondering what was your trobed centric episode masterlist like? or if it’s possible, is there a way to send me the post? sorry i’m new to tumblr so i’m still learning how this app works. if you see this, thanks :)

hi, welcome! I've found that community tumblr is probably my favorite fandom space I've ever been involved in, and I hope you've had a good experience so far. I totally get the New App Learning Curve thing, I'm historically very shit at learning how to use new apps, even though I'm "young" (20), but I eventually got it and you will too, Trust 👍👍👍

anyway, Yes one of the first things I did on here after joining was make a trobed-centric episode masterlist for someone who was asking lmfao. since it was one of the First things I did there's some formatting and other things I'd do differently now, and I've actually been looking for an excuse to go ahead and get that done, so. here we go.

the trobed-centric episode masterlist (revamped)

1x05: advanced criminal law

plot B

abed takes the "friends mess with each other" rule too far; he creates a whole fake language and spends a lot of money on trying to convince troy that he is an alien

"from now on, abed, friends don't mess with each other"

(this is the first time they do their signature handshake)

1/5 gayness, pretty platonic

1x10: environmental science

plot B

it's the "somewhere out there" episode what more do I need to say

3/5 gayness, something's happening fs

1x11: the politics of human sexuality

plot C

abed keeps beating troy in athletic competitions, making troy feel threatened. he eventually admits that abed is the better athlete and they make up

2/5 gayness, pretty platonic but it has its moments

1x22: the art of discourse

plot C

troy and abed work to complete abed's list of quintessential freshman year of college experiences list

2/5 gayness, they repeatedly put completing the list above looking cool in front of women

1x25: pascal's triangle revisited

plot C

troy is moving out of his dad's house and wants to move in with abed, but abed says no because he's afraid being that close and spending that much time together will result in constant annoyance, and will destroy their friendship

troy realizes that "too much of a good thing can be bad" and instead agrees to move in with pierce

1/5 gayness

2x02: accounting for lawyers

part of plot A

jeff gets sucked back into his old life as he reconnects with alan, a coworker from his old law firm. troy, abed, and annie try to gather proof that jeff's friend is the one who got him fired in the first place

more trobedison centric, and is actually the first episode where the three of them are established as a Trio™

"all I heard was suck" "YOU CHLOROFORMED THE JANITOR" "I usually have one foot out of reality and even I'm freaking out right now"

1/5 gayness, pretty platonic. they're the sillies ever I love trobedison

2x06: epidemiology

part of plot A

it's the zombie episode, come ON

trobed have coordinating costumes but troy bails during the party because he doesn't want to look lame and nerdy in front of women, which hurts abed's feelings

abed sacrifices himself to save troy once they are the last two standing during the "rabies pathogen" breakout

"I love you" "I know" (oh my GODDD sedate me)

5/5 gayness. you get it.

2x09: conspiracy theories and interior design

plot B

the original blanket fort 💯💯💯

2/5 gayness, just guys bein silly (and in love???)

2x15: early 21st century romanticism

plot B

troy and abed fall for the same girl and decide to take her to the valentine's dance together, after which she can decide which one of them she wants to date

she picks troy, but troy gets upset that she didn't pick abed (because why wouldn't she pick abed, he's so cool) and breaks it off almost immediately

I"happy valentine's day" "it is now"

5/5 gayness jesus christ this one is INSANE

2x18: custody law and eastern european diplomacy

plot B

britta likes troy and abed's new friend, lukka, who she finds out is a literal war criminal. she keeps this information from troy and abed because she doesn't want to ruin their friendship with him, but they find out eventually

2/5 gayness they're attached at the hip in this one

2x19: critical film studies

random moments

this episode is more focused on jeff and abed, but there's a lot of classic Troy Gets Jealous™ moments so I decided to include it. plus the end tag is them randomly having dinner together at the fancy restaurant (a date 😔)

basically troy is afraid that jeff is a cooler friend to abed than him

3/5 gayness even though they barely interact, troy is so silly

2x20: competitive wine tasting

part of plot B

I almost didn't include this one, and it's not even on my original list, but whatever

troy pretends to be traumatized, originally to seem less shallow in his acting class, but he keeps it going in order to attract britta. he tells abed about it and abed Does Not Like That At All

"troy. nothing good can come of this"

I wouldn't call abed being jealous a Rare Occurrence but he generally conceals it way better than troy does

2/5 gayness, could be interpreted as abed just worried about relationships forming under false pretense, but to Me he's jealous

2x22: applied anthropology and culinary arts

plot C

pierce buys the rights to troy and abed's handshake (a la Indecent Proposal) which "corrupts" it

"pierce tainted our special handshake with his blood money and now we can't get the magic baaaack :((((("

eventually they do indeed get the magic back

3/5 gayness idk there's something about the way they interact in this one that is inexplicably gay to me lmao

3x01: biology 101

plot C plus random moments

"speaking of figuring things out, me and abed have an announcement" "..." "troy and I are living together :D"

cougartown gets moved to midseason, then cougarton abbey ends after 6 episodes, abed's routine keeps getting thrown off, and troy is just extremely supportive and protective throughout

4/5 gayness troy loves him a lot!!!!!!

3x03: remedial chaos theory

random moments

(I know this ep is listed as 3x04 on streaming services but in canon it takes place here and on the dvds it's listed as 3x03. there's a joke about it in the episode too if you didn't know. anyway)

"troy and abed's new apartment!!!" "bienvenido a la casa chez trobed!" "wanna stay up all night talking in our bunk beds?"

all their pictures on the wall and their matching suits lol

the end tag "evil troy and evil abed" & troy's soft "what's wrong :("

3/5 gayness they're lowkey married your honor

3x05: horror fiction in seven spooky steps

random moments

troy's whole story he tells where they Literally become attached at the hip

"my partner"

troy dancing while abed's humming daybreak

2/5 gayness

3x06: advanced gay

plot B

troy deciding whether he wants to do plumbing or air conditioning and deciding all he really wants to do is watch tv with abed

gay symbolism? gay symbolism? gay symbolism?

4/5 gayness mostly for the conversation at the hawthorne wipes gathering. I could write an essay on just that

3x07: studies in modern movement

plot A

annie moves in with troy and abed. very trobedison centric

"kiss me woodsman troy!"

3/5 gayness once again casually in love they're soulmates your honor

3x09: foosball and nocturnal vigilantism

plot B

annie breaks abed's $200 special edition dark knight dvd set on accident, trobedison shenanigans ensue yippee!!!

"awww is that the grappling hook I got you for christmas???"

3/5 gayness for the same reasons as before

3x10: regional holiday music

part of plot A

literally putting this on here just because of the christmas infiltration rap (and baby boomer santa)

3/5 gayness it's glee club what can you do

3x11: contemporary impressionists

plot A

(once again, I know this episode is listed as 3x12 on streaming services, but in canon it's supposed to chronologically be here, and is listed as 3x11 on the dvds)

the study group helps abed pay off his debts to a celebrity impersonator website by playing characters at a bar mitzvah (after troy scolds them for trying to ground abed in reality)

they have an argument at the end ugh

3/5 gayness troy loves abed a lot and abed doesn't realize that he's doing something wrong

3x12: urban matrimony and the sandwich arts

plot C

(see the above disclaimer about episode order)

troy and abed decide to be normal for shirley's wedding rehearsal

troy and abed being normal 🤝

4/5 gayness they blow off a girl to be weird again

3x13: digital exploration of interior design

plot C

blanket fort: redux (oh god)

vice dean laybourne escalates what started as a minor disagreement in order to drive a wedge between troy and abed. it works

5/5 gayness, if a sitcom doesn't have the two codependent fanonical gays go through an unnecessarily dramatic "break up" then I don’t want it

3x14: pillows and blankets

plot A

🎶troy and abed are in conflict🎶 *cries*

pillow fort vs. blanket fort

they eventually make up but not before they hurt each others' feelings a Lot

5/5 gayness the dramatics jesus christ

3x16: virtual systems analysis

random moments

so this episode is more focused on abed and annie, and troy and abed actually don't Technically interact with each other very much at all, but. you know

abed kinda freaks out when troy and britta go on a date because it "messes with the fabric of the group" (🤨 I know what you are)

troy calls annie to "check on abed" boy you are on a date with a woman

4/5 gayness just from subtext you get it

3x17: basic lupine urology

random moments

troy and abed play detective as they try to figure out who sabotaged the group's biology project

"we can't both do the zinger"

4/5 gayness no explanation

3x19: curriculum unavailable

random moments

the study group is expelled from greendale and abed gets arrested for spying on campus, so he's supposed to have a psychological evaluation

troy is just very protective of him in this episode, plus the flashback clip where he and Annie are comforting him as he's freaking out about daylight savings

"our adventures are VERY manly"

4/5 gayness

3x21: the first chang dynasty

random moments

oof baboof with you two! (all the plumber shenanigans are hilarious)

mostly putting this one on here for the goodbye scene at the end of the episode, though. god

"he said, 'I know you hate when people do this in movies.' sorry I got emotional"

3x22: introduction to finality

plot B

abed "goes crazy" without troy (who's off at a/c repair school)

when troy comes back he prioritizes abed over britta (who he supposedly has romantic feelings for)

"I miss abed so much" "you're afraid you'll go crazy without troy"

4/5 gayness one could say they're a little codependent

4x03: conventions of space and time

plot A

troy gets jealous of (read: goes "psycho girlfriend on") abed's new inspector spacetime superfan friend toby

britta, even as troy's literal girlfriend, calls abed troy's boyfriend and supports troy through the whole thing

"for the first time in my long history of being locked inside things, I knew someone would come" let me just put my head through my wall really quick

5/5 gayness even though troy has a whole gf. that's how gay this episode is

4x11: basic human anatomy

plot A

troy and abed pretend to switch bodies, like in freaky friday, in order to help troy process his feelings about his relationship with britta

5/5 gayness holy SHIT y'all. I could write thousands of words on this episode. it is so hard to justify troy's actions in this one without reading him as a closeted gay person not lying

5x03: basic intergluteal numismatics

random moments

including this one because of how abed comforts troy and pushes him around in a wheelchair for the entire episode

3/5 gayness it's the casual married-ness again smh

5x04: cooperative polygraphy

random moments

this is another one I didn't include on my original list but I decided fuck it

the bit uncovering the actual origin of their patented handshake is so funny "I can't even look at you right now" "then you should know I'm crying"

also just the. look on abed's face when troy agrees to go on the trip at the end. "cool. cool cool cool." "that's a lie" UGHHHHH

4/5 gayness again. so typical

5x05: geothermal escapism

plot A

do I need to say a word

ouch ouch ouch OUCH

5/5 gayness especially the deleted dialogue from the last scene (I've posted it before but lmk if you don't know what I'm talking about. disclaimer it makes me want to launch myself off the empire state building)

alright. there it is folks. I was going to make another subsection of other random iconic trobed moments and cite the episodes they're from but basically every single episode has at least one, so that list would be Way too long to qualify as a supplement to this one lmao. however! if you have a Trobed Moment™ stuck in your head (or any Moment for that matter) and you can't remember which episode it's from feel free to ask me, I'm confident that my internal community database will be able to Remind You. anyway. hope this was helpful. bye

[peachjagiya]

https://www.tumblr.com/peachjagiya/758985707150884864/i-have-seen-a-few-accounts-say-even-jimin-knew-tae

“Whichever way, I feel like Tae has a bullshit detector. He's been doing this for a long time, right? He knows all the shenanigans. My controversial thought is that this one moment, the only one in the entire episode, is the moment serious Tae comes out to play. Where he doesn't actually seem that amused by it and his laugh doesn't quite reach his eyes. His "really? Why?" is in a serious tone that doesn't actually seem like his mood for the rest of the episode. It's the only time I think he's having to participate in a narrative and he's not here for it. I also wonder if it's annoying being told what it's like to sleep with your own boyfriend.”

So I have question: Why would this happen? Why would they do this to TK aaall these years?!?!?! Is this necessary to go THIS hard?!?!?! I genuinely do not understand!!!

Well I don't know if this is just me thinking negatively, you see.

I actually think BH really presented the whole thing in a natural kind of way and I've been so happy with AYS so far.

So broadly, in terms of why things like this seem to have happened before and why these narratives are in place:

It's good PR. I think all celebrities kind of have these simple stories to pull out in interviews. Maybe it makes good sense to have a curated public image that provides a smokescreen for the private life that exists somewhat seperately. Does that make sense?

It creates a distraction. If you adhere to the idea that there's a same sex couple in this group in a conservative country and their reputation is at stake, they might not want people to look at that. So a distraction from the truth makes sense. So Jungkook being in Jimin's room a couple of times maybe turns into "he's always in my room at 3am" and suddenly nobody is looking at the contrary evidence that he's been with Tae.

Tae isn't supported and his designated character is Weird Loner. This is kind of more troubling to think about but I do personally believe there's been efforts to isolate him in the story. Him being super close to Jungkook doesn't support that.

And you know, I don't think it's a tinfoil hat conspiracy theory that this happened. All of this worked. It did exactly what it was supposed to. There are people even now absolutely convinced that Tae and JK didn't spend any time together over certain periods when we know otherwise.

I don't know why they had to throw particularly Tae under the bus with it by going this hard. It's also put JK and Jimin in an awkward position. I also don't know how they don't see the Streisand Effect of it.

If this is what happened here, and I do completely think it was blessedly isolated in the episode, there's a reason for it. We needed to know they shared a cabin for some reason. Maybe they didn't actually share a cabin and that's not in keeping with the vibe of the show. Maybe it's something as simple as keeping up appearances. Even in a show that seems to be dismantling a lot of previous ideas, it doesn't make sense for your road trippin' besties to not share a cabin? (Even though late twenties and wanting your own space is pretty normal, I think) I don't know, just theorising.

I'd love your thoughts on it. I may have delulu'd too close to the sun.

Thanks anon 💜

Just a thought and unrelated to anon: I don't know why I've suddenly come over all insecure and nervous but I feel kind of bad for putting a negative idea out there when we're having such a lovely time with this episode and since Hawaii really! I try to treat this as my blog to say my genuine thoughts in but I do feel a lot of responsibility to say the right things sometimes. But with all the love in the world, I'm assuming everyone knows that if they don't love any of my energy, they can curate their space accordingly. Or possibly you've interacted with me enough on here to politely disagree in the comments and we'll know it's no big deal. I'm just yapping here, I guess. Maybe I just feel a little way about harshing the buzz with more "narrative" talk. 💜

[cookiesupplier]

Every Rose Has Its Thorns - Part Forty-Two

pairing: Ricky Olson x ofc x Chris 'Motionless' Cerulli

warnings/tropes: slow burn, soulmates, strangers to enemies to lovers, betrayal, angst, fluff, smut, language, online bullying, panic attacks, stalking, mental health issues, conspiracy theories.

summary: In a world where soulmates inexplicably receive a tattoo that will match that of their soulmate the moment they turn eighteen years old, being famous and covered in very visible tattoos can make finding your true soulmate a questionable fate. For everyone involved.

author’s note: Unbeta'd as usual, enjoy!

To read from the beginning, check out the Masterlist Here!

tags: @faceless-mirror @missduffsblog @tamtam-elizabeth @witchyweeb34 @tearfallpixie

@wild-child-7747 @shilohrosechicken @lacktoesandtoddlerants @blackveilomens @valiantroeagleangel

@bngurngheart @dominuslunae @collapsedglasshouses @embracethereaper42 @emmmm127

@sunsshinesunny @spicywhenspeaking

If you would like to be added to this tag list please see THIS FORM

Talia was ready, Ricky had told her yesterday before she left that he was going to pick her up along with Chris. She had offered to meet him there if he’d only tell him where they were going, but he’d been stubborn and refused to tell her what he had planned. More realistically, Talia probably thought he had absolutely no idea what they were going to do and him asking them on this date was spur of the moment and now was scrambling on the fly. What else could it be, he’d only just confirmed they were all without a doubt soulmates together yesterday afternoon, it wasn’t like he’d been planning this date for a while. Ricky had been vehemently against wanting to date her, wanting to date anyone, let alone having anything to do with soulmates, thanks to Grace. Let's be honest, Talia not only didn’t blame him, she had been feeling exactly the same way for years now, at least about the soulmates part. The dating part had been partially made that way because of the soulmate side of it.

So no, she didn’t blame him one bit, and yes, she thought he was scrambling now find something that was worthy of this date, at least she hoped he was. Then again, if anyone could get a reservation, or whatever he had planned, for something last minute in this town, it would be a member from a band that had made a name for themselves. Not to mention called this town home. Who knows what he could be coming up with on the fly. 

By the time the pair of them had finished with work together to get her ready, Talia felt like a porcelain doll, plucked, and polished to perfection. At least she had managed to talk her out of the stiletto heels she tried to convince her to borrow. There was no way she would have wanted to wear them on a date even if she’d known where she was going, let alone a mystery date. So instead she was wearing some mid-heel wedges. They were enough that they still made her ass look phenomenal according to Ava, but still felt like she had solid footing, she never felt like she had the balance to tiptoe in stilettos anyway. Ava had tried to claim to convince her that it wasn’t balance, it was confidence, but all it got from Talia was an eye roll as she turned back to the mirror to finish her makeup.

Now, she was waiting in the foyer of Vinny’s house until Ricky and Chris got there. She had always planned to. However, Ava tried to insist on going even one step further than that, just waiting for them to come to the door apparently wasn’t enough for her. This was an official date, Ava had even wanted to open the door herself like she was her overprotective parent. Only to have Talia scoff slightly and glancing over to Vinny.

“Hey Vinny, so, you know how I’m not a cock block while I’m living here?”

Oh, watching his eyes go wide right then was amusing, perfect.

“Right, so-”

“Ava, babe, let's go make some popcorn and watch a movie-”

Yea, he was getting what she was throwing down, now, whether Talia would actually do what she was implying, making his sex life very difficult and all that? That was beside the point. Obviously, Vinny wasn’t about to take that risk by letting his girlfriend get in the way. Talia couldn’t help but chuckle a little as she witnessed a complaining Ava being pulled along as Vinny sort to get her out of the way as she waited for Ricky and Chris to arrive. Hopefully it wouldn’t take them much longer. She was at least still waiting inside, Ava might not get to usher Ricky and Chris inside to interrogate them as she had wanted to, but Talia was still going to expect them to come to the door like gentlemen. It was a date, after all. It was almost a shame Ava was already practically living with Vinny, she’d skipped this part, cheater.

Oh, oh! There was the doorbell. Hearing a squeal from the kitchen and Vinny’s voice calling Ava’s name, followed by a No, Talia laughed, good luck Vinny wrangling her tonight, he was going to need to. Talia had a funny feeling, if Vinny didn’t manage to keep her occupied, she was going to get plagued with messages all night with how the date was going.. Actually.. Before she reached the door, she turned her head and called out back into the house,

“Vinny, confiscate her phone, will you?”

“Consider it done!”

Oh, she didn’t know if there was a scuffle, or if Vinny had taken her phone at that exactly moment, but then:

“Hey!”

Laughing as she moved towards the door, hearing the echoes of Ava’s complaints as she made it to answer the knock. That was one less thing she had to worry about at least, she could get the run-down of her date, after it was over and not pestering her during their date. As the door swung open, her eyes fell on Ricky and Chris.

They’d both walked to the door, of course, there was no way they one of them was going to stay in the car. Ricky not only had been the one that planned the date, he knew where they were going, but Chris insisted. There was no way that they were both going to stay in the car and just honk the horn to wait for her, no chance. Something about tonight felt like they’d been waiting for this date forever, which was rather funny, because Rick, had been in a committed relationship for years, so how was he waiting for this? 

He’d almost gotten engaged to Grace, even.

Yet, there was still something about tonight, something that felt, right. While it felt like he’d had years of his life ripped away, and that fear, that pain, he wouldn’t lie, it was still a wound that was open. He’d catch himself with moments wondering about what she was doing when he’d get reminded of her, fuck, how long was he going to be reminded of her, and it was going to kill him her lies, and the manipulation. Then he thought of Talia, and the relief, it wasn’t instant, she actually made the pain worse for a while. After all, there had been a moment when it was like he just couldn’t breathe. Then, now, when he could take a breath, that pain bled away and everything felt better. Adding Chris to the mix, and Rick felt so much calmer. The paranoia about worry about whether he could trust himself, just as he said to Talia, he wouldn’t lie, it was till there, but trusting both of them, together? That thought was so much easier. That was why he was here, that was why he was sure he could do this now.

So yes, it felt like he’d been waiting for this day, like something in him had been holding his breath waiting for this moment when everything was just how it was meant to be.

Taking one car, it was just so much more reasonable that Chris following him in his, Ricky drove them to Vinny’s to pick up Talia. No, he wasn’t giving Chris a hint of where they were going for their date. Both of them were dressed nice and casual, nice jeans, shirts, jacket hoodies, Chris knew him pretty well in that. Rick had no idea however what to expect from Talia, and he hadn’t told her what to expect from tonight.. So when the door opened and they saw her in that red dress.

Oh, that dress. 

He would be worried she had been expecting something far more extravagant than he had planned, but all he could think about, as he looked over her, was how exquisite she was. Her eyes were bright, and the fact that they were dressed casual didn’t seem to make her blink. If anything, she giggled happily as she quickly came out of the front door of the house, closing it behind her. 

“Damn, JellyBean, aren’t you something gorgeous tonight, sure we have to go out Rick?”

Smiling at the question from Chris, and the way Talia’s cheeks brightened from the obvious appraisal from them both as they walked down the path at the front of the house towards Ricky’s car in the driveway. 

“If we don’t, put that dress to waste, be a damn shame Spookie. You do look absolutely amazing, Sweetheart.”

Ricky couldn’t help but jibe at him, which had the blushing Talia in another pearl of giggles as they got to the car, which he wasn’t about to complain about in the least.

“Come on now, that's Talia’s nickname for me.”

Ricky just had to grin, chucking as Chris complaint, enjoying the way the other man’s face flushed all the same when he called him it. He might be complaining, but it had an effect, it was obvious.

“But it's so much fun making you squirm just now.”

He grinned as he opened the front passenger door for her, Chris could sit in the back, he wasn’t about to regulate Talia to the back when she had come out dressed up like that. Chris was just going to have to deal with it, but considering the way that he went straight for the back door without any fuss, he certainly didn’t seem to mind when Talia slid into the front seat.

As he climbed in behind the driving wheel, before he even got the car started, Chris was asking from the backseat.

“Now that Talia is here, can we get a hint of what we’re doing, or where we are going, now?”

Ricky shook his head with a laugh. Chris had been trying to get the information out of him all morning, but he’d been refusing, telling him that it wasn’t fair to tell him, but not Talia, of course, he’d use that against him.

“You just can’t be patient and accept a surprise, can you, Babe?”

Now that, got even more of a reaction from him than Spookie, that was definitely Talia’s, and with that, Ricky just grinned, yes, he had a good feeling about how this night was going to go. Starting the car, ready to get going as he pulled out of the drive and onto the road so they could get on their way. Ricky smirked as he focused on the road ahead, glancing in his rear view mirror at the squirming Chris in the back seat, knowing the effect he’d had on him. Enjoying the effect he’d had on him. Still, he was the only one that had any idea where they were going, so he had to focus, and he did. Change of topic, something else.

“So, Talia, what was up as you came out, all amused, practically giggling like a school girl.”

That just seemed to make her giggle again,

“That, was because I got Vinny to confiscate Ava’s phone. I mean, with how she has been all day, not to mention the fact she had planned to answer the door and wanted to interrogate the two of you before our date? I just knew she wasn’t going to leave me alone all night long, so after sort of, implying I’d cock block him if he didn’t help me, he called Ava off, and asked him to confiscate her phone. Then I walked out the door as she complained.” Her explanation was met from both men by a round of laughter, just the fact that she’d used the implication of cock blocking Vinny to get him on her side tonight had been hilarious enough. It was definitely a smooth ploy.

“Oh that's smart Sweetheart, very smart.”

“I love it JellyBean, remind me never to get in your way.”

All three of them laughing as they drove, their date night starting off in good spirits already.

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

[blueskittlesart]

feelings on the ‘link who went into the shrine of resurrection isnt the same one who came out’ theory/hc? apologies if this has already been clarified

sigh. this theory occupies the exact same niche in my mind as the "link is dead in mm" theory tbh (by which i mean its the bane of my fucking existence.) Technically, i believe it is possible within the preestablished lore of the franchise. However, I think the only way you come to a conclusion like this is by deliberately ignoring a lot of the writing of the game.

in my opinion, loz as a franchise is at its best when it functions as a thematic narrative. my favorite games in the series all function as narratives on two levels--the first is the obvious one, the hero's journey story that the player actually physically plays through. the second level is the one that really hooks ME on these games though, and that's the thematic level. oot, for example, is essentially a story about a young boy going on a journey to save his kingdom. But on a thematic level, it's about the relationships between adults and children and the trauma of growing up. breath of the wild functions similarly. essentially it is a story about a boy waking up with no memories and saving a princess from a monster. but on a thematic level, botw is a commentary on trauma and growth and healing.

the gist of the theory you're talking about is that the original pre-calamity link was unable to be resurrected and the shrine of resurrection just made a new one in his place, and that's why he has no memories. depending on how deep into the theory you go, some suggest that everyone the original link knew pre-calamity is in on this conspiracy and are deliberately gaslighting the new link into believing he is the same person as the original. to be entirely honest, i think it technically works on a purely literal level. COULD the shrine of resurrection have probably made a new link? yes. COULD zelda and everyone else be conspiring to convince link he's a real boy? sure. technically yes. there's not REALLY anything wrong with this from an in-universe standpoint. it's all technically possible. but imo the only way to come to this conclusion is to ignore the fact that botw functions on a secondary level as a metaphor.

I think there's a tendency among a certain type of superfan to forget that media is created by PEOPLE, and that writing decisions are made deliberately. especially in a game as vast and immersive as botw, it's admittedly easy to forget sometimes that the world and the narrative were crafted by human beings and therefore narrative and worldbuilding decisions were made for a reason. but if you take a step back and analyze it from a writer's perspective, botw's thematic narrative is almost richer than its face-value story. it's built into the characters, the world, the lore, EVERYTHING in the game is structured around its central themes. this is part of what i believe makes botw such a successful and relatable game. Its central message, that it's never too late for growth, that healing is possible, that just because things are broken doesn't mean they can't be fixed, is woven so beautifully into the very bones of the game. There's a REASON that link wakes up with no memories, and it's not because he's a victim of a kingdom-wide conspiracy about his own death. it's because he is meant to seem broken beyond repair. he wakes up on the near-abandoned great plateau--DELIBERATELY abandoned, because the player is meant to view the world as broken beyond repair at this point in the story, with no memories, no heart containers, no stamina. A shell of the warrior he once was. and the rest of the game is dedicated to the discovery that he can heal. he can find his memories, he can grow stronger, he can form new relationships and he can do better. hope was not lost when he fled hyrule castle 100 years ago. hope is never lost so long as there are people who are willing to keep trying to rebuild. hyrule is not a dead, abandoned kingdom as it first seems when you awake. Hyrule is ALIVE. there are cities and stables and merchants and travelers and people living and dying and continuing on every single day.

to suggest that link didn't actually survive requires you to, at best, deliberately ignore all of that thematic setup, and at worst, retcon it out of existence. if link isn't really link, if the whole world is conspiring against him, then that means that the original link really was doomed. that he can never heal from what happened to him. that he was exactly what he believed himself to be--a failure who doomed hyrule to a century of suffering. it removes link's agency and his impact as the main character of this story--if he was never hurt in the first place, he has nothing to heal from. there's no message there, nothing to be learned. he's just going through the motions of the story because he's been told to--arguably falling into the exact same trap that the original did.

again, is the theory technically plausible? yes. in-universe, the groundwork exists for it to have happened. but if you refuse to look at a narrative outside of its own governing universe, it's easy to forget that people tell stories for a reason. botw is written the way it is because its writers had something to say. Why does link lose all his memories after the shrine? In-universe, this is a mystery, yes. to someone who is only willing to examine that plot point within the confines of that universe, yeah, it seems like a plot hole, and yeah, this theory might explain it. but from a writer's perspective, it's not a plot hole at all. it's a clear, deliberate writing decision. just because a story asks you to suspend your disbelief a little bit for the sake of the greater narrative doesn't mean that the writers are actually secretly plotting a conspiracy and link isn't really link. it means you're being asked to either willingly suspend your disbelief, or examine why you're being asked to do so from a writing standpoint.

[nonwal]

each half blind without a mirror

(AKA, the time travel shadowgast fic that I'm not going to finish writing. So here's the beginning and the plot outline. Be warned, it’s not technically an unhappy ending but it’s certainly bittersweet, with a lot of alternate timeline MCD.)

Bren Aldric Ermendrud does not like Vergesson Sanatorium because deep down, he knows that he belongs there. He's been a little mad for a long time, but he's never told anyone about it. It has yet to interfere with work, and that is what matters. If his dreams are filled with smoke and blood and vague prophecies in his own voice, that is his own business. If he is occasionally convinced that he is being watched--well, who is to say that he isn't? Trent has eyes everywhere. But it does mean that he answers the summons to the sanatorium with more trepidation than strictly necessary.

"Sorry," Astrid says when he arrives just outside the gate. "I didn't know how to explain the situation over Sending." "It's fine," he says mildly. "You can apologize by explaining now." She hesitates. "I don't know how to explain now. We captured Thelyss. He tried to kill Master Ikithon. And as far as we can tell, he's gone mad." That is…a lot to take in. Bren quashes something that might be hope or might be simmering fury. "You need me to verify that it's him," he guesses after a moment. "He was your contact, and our master is very interested in learning why he is here and not in a grave in Ghor Dranas," she says dryly. "Ah." Bren connects the dots now, recognizes what she isn't saying. Essek Thelyss had been Bren's charge, at least until he’d been executed after his plans to steal the beacons were revealed by an unknown party. It was an inconvenience that Bren has…already paid dearly for. But if he’s faked his death, if he has made an attempt on Ikithon’s life--that reeks of a conspiracy. Bren is in danger. But isn't he always? "You said that he's mad?" he asks as Astrid guides him inside. "We thought he was faking it at first. But even under a Zone of Truth, he speaks contradictory nonsense." "Such as?" "He is convinced that Vess died due to a disagreement with a cultist over a city made out of meat, that I am the Archmage of Civil Influence, that he is friends with a cleric whose powers come from a talking weasel, that he successfully stole the beacons but they were given back, that he was born in 715 PD and he is one hundred thirty-seven years old--" "He doesn't know what year it is?" "He's aware that it's 832. He insists his math is right anyhow. We've already tried removing any curses he may be under, healing, a Greater Restoration--anything we can think of. He isn't a shapeshifter, he isn't under any magical effects. He claims that it was him who got executed, and the execution did kill him, but also that he's never died before." She lets out a frustrated breath. "He also insists that he is perfectly sane, but what madman doesn't?" "Interesting," says the madman walking next to her. "Do you have any theories?" She sighs. "I was hoping that you would," Astrid admits. “He’s your responsibility.” "I watched him die. I verified that it was him. This could be a clone? Or some other attempt at transferring his consciousness." "Did he mention dabbling in necromancy?" "That really isn't the sort of thing he would have admitted to me." Their conversations were always more…complicated.

(and then the outline below)

Bren gets summoned because the Assembly has caught Essek Thelyss during an assassination attempt on Trent. The same Essek who definitely got caught and executed by the Dynasty before he could steal the beacons. The same Essek that Bren had been working very closely with

Bren talks to the captured drow. It is Essek. It is not the Essek that he knew

he eventually determines that this Essek is a time traveler who has been stuck in the past and has subsequently altered this timeline, and that this Essek knew him in the future timeline

he asks Essek if the future Bren came with him to the past. Essek admits that yes, the original spell was supposed to bring them both back to the past for a short period of time and then back to the present, but for some reason Essek got left behind and the timeline didn’t loop smoothly the way they had intended

he asks Essek if the future Bren came with him to save his parents. Essek asks how he knew that

Bren knew that because for the past seventeen years, he has been working under the assumption that he was delusional. When he killed his parents, he wandered behind the house for a minute and “hallucinated” seeing them escape through an unblocked window and disappear with a stranger, and thus he never broke

Essek is relieved to know why timeline didn’t loop correctly. I think I know why you got left behind, too, but you won’t like it, Bren adds

Essek demands to know anyway. Bren refuses to tell him until he explains what happened to his Essek. Essek explains that in the timeline he’s from, the theft of the beacons led to a war. He tried to convince his current self not to steal them, and failed—so he planted the right evidence to prevent the plot a different way, leading to his own death

“I’m not surprised that you couldn’t convince him. You are very different.” “In a good way.” “No, not in a good way. I think I loved him. I do not think I would love you.” “…I’m sorry.” “No, don’t be. I assume you loved that other version of me, ja? I killed him, too. So we’re even. Fair play.”

it turns out this Essek was not left behind. The spell failed because after Essek teleported his parents to safety, Bren saw Caleb inside the house, panicked, and killed him. The spell failed because one of the people who cast it died

Essek is. A little despondent over this, understandably. He isn’t stuck in a shitty AU past where everything is going wrong, futilely hoping that Caleb will come back again and rescue him—he’s stuck in the only remaining timeline, and Caleb no longer exists at all

Essek proposes a pact: in his timeline, he helped defeat Trent Ikithon. If Bren frees him, he can help do the same in this one

Bren agrees. They flee together, and go into hiding, begin plotting for the years ahead. They are both mourning a version of the other that no longer exists. They have both murdered each other’s lover. They are both wearing the face of each other’s lover. It is not easy company

Essek knows how to track down most of the Nein, still a year before they all meet. He doesn’t know exactly how Bren could play the part of Caleb—but Caleb did leave behind letters

Bren goes to visit his parents. It’s weird. He’s missed them, and an insane part of him has never really believed that they were gone—but they have the letters from a version of him that never came to be. Much like Essek, they were hoping he would be someone else. (They try to be happy for him regardless. But he can tell they thought he would be a better man.)

the Mighty Nein still meet in roughly the same fashion, except Veth and “Caleb” just…have a strange tension between them. Things start to deviate at Alfield. The ruse gets harder to maintain. Beau is paranoid that someone is following them, watching at a distance. In Zadash, Bren manages to keep his mouth shut during the Zone of Truth but has a panic attack prior to the Victory Pit and has to tap out because he knows that Trent would be watching

the beacons were never stolen, though. So there is no broken tower, no declaration of war, no push to get out of town as quickly as possible. Bren convinces the group to head north, but—they get as far as Bowlgate, and things properly escape his control. Essek has to intervene. They explain the ruse, the time travel

people are, to put it lightly, kind of fucking pissed

they do still go to Hupperdook, now with Essek. It’s a little bit tenser than the original timeline, between the Nein being extra wary of Bren and Essek, and Bren and Essek still being wary of each other

no one gets kidnapped. Molly doesn’t die. They take out the Iron Shepherds and recruit Caduceus. And then it’s…boat time? Caleb didn’t leave great notes about that and Essek doesn’t exactly know what went down, but they do end up becoming pirates

they get the Happy Fun Ball and the Mighty Nein have to restrain Essek from immediately returning to explore it. He tries to explain that the key to taking out Ikithon was found there, but Bren would rather bide his time than risk the Archmage’s Bane with a less-seasoned adventuring group, and takes the Nein’s side. They finally begin to bond with him after the incident. Essek tries (fails) not to be jealous

they discuss next steps as they sail back to Nicodranas. There is no war, no stolen beacons, no burned Felderwin and kidnapped husband to bring them over to Xhorhas. They decide to still tackle the Angel of Irons cult, this time keeping Yasha safe

they arrive at Nicodranas. To news of a war and a burned Felderwin.

Essek holds it together for long enough to verify that Veth’s entire family made it out okay (having never begun working for the Assembly) and then he fucking falls apart. The Nein have never really bonded with the weird time traveler who keeps trying to manipulate them into following a specific path, simultaneously following his own agenda and wishing they were future versions of themselves—but they try to comfort him as best they can

Later, when everyone else has gone to bed, he says to Bren, “It was all for nothing. I didn’t stop it.” “The way I see it, this means the war—the one you remember—wasn’t your fault. It would have happened without you. Silver lining?” Essek is quiet, a very unconvinced sort of quiet. Finally, he says, “I got myself killed. For this. And it wasn’t enough. He died for nothing—I was him, once upon a time, I was almost exactly him except that I never knew you—“ This is the first time that Essek has ever expressed proper regret for killing the Essek that Bren has always privately thought of as his. Softly, he says, “You didn’t know. It’s okay.” “I killed him for nothing. It is not okay.” “Ja, well, sometimes you kill your mirror self and you entire life goes to shit. I wish I hadn’t killed your Caleb, either, but it’s a little too late for that.”

they reach a new understanding of each other after that. Not exactly romantically—they have sex, a few weeks later, and both agree that it doesn’t feel the same—but at least they become tentative friends with occasional and probably inadvisable benefits

the war did not happen over stolen beacons, and there is no beacon to return in order to end it. They stay far away from the Dynasty, struggle their way through the Happy Fun Ball with Yasha’s help, manage to kill the heart first and take down Obann when the ritual to free the Laughing Hand fails as a result

there is no peace treaty. There is no way to end the war. They go out of order and tackle the hag next, turn Nott back to Veth. They get the residuum for the Blooming Grove, Fjord becomes a paladin, Travelercon is still a clusterfuck

the war gets worse. They discuss the possibility of stealing the Pride’s Call beacon as leverage, and head back to Zadash to begin investigating—and then Yasha disappears

the first thought is more Angel of Irons shit, but when they scry on her they see her traveling with Cree. Turns out Lucien didn’t need Molly to be dead to come back

there’s a race to the north, trying to stop them, trying to unpossess Yasha. They don’t read the book, don’t get any eyes—but this is so far off the original timeline that Essek doesn’t know what to expect. They go through Aeor, they take down the Tombtakers, they reach Cognouza, they fight Lucien-as-Yasha…

but unlike Molly’s body, Yasha doesn’t die

things go bad. Very bad. Molly goes down first, and then Caduceus when he tries to reach the body. Then Veth, then Fjord. When Jester goes down, with Bren on his last legs, Essek manages to get within range for a plane shift—but Beau refuses to leave Yasha behind

Essek Thelyss and Bren Aldric Ermendrud return to the Material Plane and prepare for the end. But nothing happens, no hungry flesh city arrives to wreak havoc. The war is getting worse, far bloodier than the one Essek remembered—but nothing beyond that

eventually, they return to Aeor, find their way back to Cognouza and the remains of their friends. Turns out, after Lucien killed Beau, there was nothing left to keep Yasha standing. Very tidy, how that one played out

They return to Aeor. The ice is preferable to flesh. Bren asks, “Did any of it go like this, in yours?” He already knows the answer, but he wants to hear it again, just in case Essek has a different one this time. “No.” Essek sits on the ground, not bothering to float. “If we could raise one of the clerics, maybe—“ “Caleb was a transmuter.” Ah. And Bren is not. “We could find a powerful cleric—“ “With the war the way it is?” Essek’s voice is brittle. On the verge of tears or on the verge of an angry outburst, he can’t tell. “And the chances of getting everyone back—“ His voice breaks. Tears, then. “My apologies. It seems the plan to kill Ikithon has fallen through.” This is such a stupid apology that Bren has to laugh at it. “Do you really think this is still about killing him, for me?” A quiet sigh. “I’m sorry, Bren.” “Ja. Well. It could be worse?” Essek glares up at him. “How, exactly?” Bren doesn’t actually know. “We’re both still alive? And Veth’s family is safe, and Jester’s. And mine.” Even if he is a stranger to them, and a bit of a disappointment compared to who he could have been— Bren wonders if it was worth the trade. The war, the Mighty Nein, the miserable elf curled up on the ground. He sighs. “No. You’re right. This is—yours was better.” And, “The chamber that we stumbled across. That was how you two…?” “Yes. But your—“ “Maybe we should go back one last time. Tell our better selves to leave things as they were. Untie the knot you made trying to form a clean loop.”

they do go back, just a few moments before Caleb and Essek arrive. Essek immediately launches himself into a hug around Caleb, explains that he got left in the past because Caleb died—and already, the other Essek is convinced

Caleb asks Bren if he was happy. If his parents were still alive. Yes to the latter, not really to the former. They read your letters, you know. They were so proud of you. But—a little less proud of me. I didn’t—it’s a long story. I never broke. My name is Bren.

Caleb asks if they’re here to stop him. If he should let it be. They say yes, and also Essek had to kill his past self to stop the beacons from being stolen but eventually there was a war for other reasons and because the Nein didn’t have any beacon there was no political leverage to stop it and it’s still getting worse and now every member of the Nein is dead—

look I just think there should be a lot of wizards hugging their traumatized alternate universe selves here

eventually Bren—seventeen years old, about to make the worst decision of his entire life—arrives in the distance. The older Bren asks if they should stay close or not. He’s only seen it as an illusion. Caleb tells him that he doesn’t need to watch the real thing. The pain won’t fix anything

they move into the woods, so far away that they can’t hear anything. Eventually there is a faint light at the distant horizon from the blaze, but nothing more. Bren and Essek—the Essek who got left behind—begin to fade into a pair of dark voids. Echoes. Just alternate timelines, shadows of something that never happened

Caleb and Essek return, a little haunted by the versions of themselves that they could have been. They go destroy the T-dock. It takes them years to tell the Mighty Nein what happened

for the rest of their lives, whenever they cast Resonant Echo, the echoes are always the same ones

[ariaste]

Are you, perchance, a 2013 BBC's Sherlock veteran

No particular reason I'm asking

I watched it and I think I probably reblogged a few things back in the day because I had mutuals who were into it. But I don't recall ever really feeling like I was in the fandom myself.

I'd guess that you're asking because you've recently read my Good Omens essay and your next question is about whether I was a supporter of The Johnlock Conspiracy, and the answer is a hard nah. At least to me personally, all the textual and meta-textual evidence made it abundantly clear, even a decade ago, that the show was not only inhospitable to queer fans, but actively and deliberately hostile towards them (one recalls that utterly mean-spirited depiction of what Steven Moffat thinks a "fangirl" looks and sounds like, as well as more than one occasion when he and others involved with the show mocked fans/fandom/fanfiction in interviews, on camera, with their actual human mouths). I do vaguely remember coming across people on tumblr in those days who were convinced that there was something else going on, that somehow Moffat was going to suddenly change his tune and start loving them back the way that they loved his show, that they would be rewarded for their faith by having their ship made canon, but that seemed extraordinarily unrealistic to me and not based on any concrete facts.

Now, don't get me wrong -- wishful thinking can be really fun, and you're not hurting anyone by hoping for the best and daydreaming about a happy ending. That's just basic human nature. But when someone shows you what kind of person they truly are, pay attention. Balance dreaming with prudence, and don't put all your eggs in one basket--or, rather, don't pin all your hopes on one stranger's artistic decisions.

Part of me wants to say that Steven Moffat is one of several significant contributors responsible for the deep-rooted media trauma that still afflicts thousands of fans today (consider how so many people watching the first season of Our Flag Means Death as it aired were utterly convinced that it was going to queerbait them and exploit their sincere, heartfelt desire for a queer love story on screen, the same way that nearly every other show had done already. So many people met that glimmer of hope with cynicism and pessimism, because when you've been not just disappointed but outright punished for wanting something, the natural trauma-response is to assume that you're not going to get it until you're proven wrong, because that's the only way you can protect your bruised, exhausted heart.

It is true that Moffat's cruelty to the fans of his show contributed to our collective media trauma. However, it is not the only thing that has done so: Particularly in America, we are in the midst of a literacy crisis. Schools have been failing us for more than two decades: They have increasingly failed to teach nuanced reading comprehension and to adequately equip young people with robust and agile critical thinking skills, and this means that an entire generation has been robbed of the tools that would help them to protect themselves from the psychic damage of media trauma before it happens. Moreover, it means that many people now insist on looking to canon to "legitimize" their ships, as if their own interest and enthusiasm was not sufficient. Instead of feeling empowered to reimagine the stories handed to us in order to suit our personal needs, we give away our power into the hands of strangers who do not feel any ethical responsibility to care for their audience as if the audience is a guest in their home. And thus, we get hurt. Media trauma is real, and it sucks.

To return to your original question, no, I don't consider myself a veteran of BBC Sherlock, because I wandered through town, saw that it wasn't worth the fight, and left before the war started.

Remember: In literary criticism and in science, you don't do good work by cherry-picking evidence that supports your pet theory; you do good work by assembling all the data and asking what theory would unify them into a cohesive whole. And if you're really good, you make the effort to be skeptical and look for evidence that might disprove your theory, and you invite others to check your math, because at the end of the day, you are a beautiful, imperfect human and sometimes you make mistakes.

[deemee-ed]

Wow, I'm so normal about this movie! *develops a DreamWorks conspiracy theory on why Me and My Shadow got cancelled*

DreamWorks and franchises: a "conspiracy theory" on why "Me and My Shadow" got cancelled

On December 10th 2010 the project for an animated movie called "Me and My Shadow" was announced by DreamWorks. The story is about a timid and boring man called Daniel Grubb and his shadow "Shadow Dan" trying to convince him to live a more exciting life. The animation style follows an idea similar to "Who Framed Roger Rabbit", except that instead of blending 2D animation and live-action it would have worked with both 2D and 3D animation, with 2D for the shadow characters and their world and 3D for the real people. Despite being half-way done, the release date of this project kept being pushed back, first from 2013 to 2014, until it entered a state of limbo and eventually got cancelled. This decision was taken mostly due to the failure in 2014 of "Mr. Peabody and Sherman", which brought to the cancellation of other projects as well.

Personally, I have been upset about this cancellation ever since I found out about this movie, mostly because I just know that if it had come out this would have been one of my favorite movies ever. A few days ago DreamWorks released a trailer for their next movie, "Megamind 2", a very cheap-looking sequel to "Megamind" set to release on March 1st 2024 on Peacock. While I was washing the dishes (lol), I thought about this trailer for a moment and had a sudden "conspiracy theory" coming up on why "Me and My Shadow" was one of the movies got cancelled after 2014: In the same trailer of "Megamind 2" they announce a new serie which will come out based on it, meaning that this movie is basically an advertisement or a pilot for the show. This is reinforced by the cheap animation commonly used in these spin-off shows.

This serie announcement made me realize something: DreamWorks has made A LOT of shows, shorts and sequels based on their movies. In other words, this studio loves creating franchises. And even though this is a common marketing choice for many studios, I feel like DreamWorks does this VERY often. Some examples are: -"Shrek", with 3 sequels (might become 4), 8 shorts, 3 TV specials, and 2 spin-off movies and 1 serie based on Puss in Boots -"Kung Fu Panda", with 2 (soon 3) sequels, 3 series and 5 shorts -"How to train your Dragon", with 2 sequels, 3 series and 6 shorts -"Madagascar", with 3 sequels, 3 series, 3 shorts and a spin-off movie based on The Penguins of Madagascar -"Trolls", with 2 sequels, 2 series, 6 shorts and 2 TV specials -"The Croods", with 1 sequel and 2 series -"Monsters vs Aliens", with 1 serie, 2 shorts and 1 TV special -"Captain Underpants", with 1 serie and a possible spin-off movie -"Mr. Peabody and Sherman", with 1 serie As you can see, both known and less known movies ended up having at least 1 serie, turning them into franchises. It's actually rarer to find movies by DreamWorks that were not turned into franchises. So I'd say it's clear that DreamWorks has quite some interest in this marketing choice.

Even their newer movie "Orion and the Dark", released on Netflix on February 2nd 2024, can work as a DreamWorks franchise. You can understand this by the presence of a TEAM of secondary characters: they can't be fully developed in a movie, but they are an interesting team that can be developed in a show. It's the same concept as the Furious Five from "Kung Fu Panda", or as the Penguins of Madagascar and King Julien from "Madagascar": a team of secondary characters the movie can't focus on, but that you wouldn't mind seeing again. And now, with the release of a show based on "Megamind 2", a new team of villains is introduced in the sequel. Villains that are very likely going to be secondary characters that could be developed more in a show. See the pattern? I believe that DreamWorks follows this as their standard for a franchise: the movie must have a team of secondary characters.

Now, let's look back at "Me and My Shadow" and let's focus on the characters. From what we know, there were going to be 4 relevant characters: -Daniel Grubb (who some of you might also know as Stanley) -Shadow Dan (also known as Shadow Stan) -Heidi (Daniel's love interest) -The Shadow Villain (the bad guy, obviously) Every other character that was seen in small Behind-The-Scenes works doesn't seem to have much relevance. There are secondary characters, but they don't seem to be connected as a team, unlike many other secondary characters from Dreamworks.

Now, here's the "conspiracy theory": I believe one of the reasons "Me and My Shadow" was cancelled is that it could not be adapted as a DreamWorks franchise. The story would have been concluded in the movie, the characters didn't need to be developed more, and none of the secondary cast could work as a team. Could they have made some shorts based on it? Probably yes, but a short is not a serie. DreamWorks seems to have more interest in shows than shorts (remember: most franchises have at least a SHOW, not a short!).

With that being said, I'd like to end this post by doing some advertisement for this movie, even if it never got a chance to be finished. Everytime I find a new clip I am filled with pure joy. "Me and My Shadow" deserves to be made. -Shout-out to SQUIDWORD15 on YouTube for finding mANY unfinished clips. Bless this fella

[creature-wizard]

how is she (Lilith) closed when she exists in Swedish folklore with a different name (Her name is Lucia but it developed into the Saint Lucia tradition to be exact but in northern Swedish folklore she has a darker past where she was adams first wife and her story is very similar to Jewish Lilith).

Edit to add: It's extremely likely that this story about Lucia being the first wife of Adam is more of a modern Internet tale than an old Swedish folktale. I can find no reputable sources to back it up, and people who have familiarity with Saint Lucia/Lussi have informed me that they've heard nothing of this kind, either. That said, my point that similarity between figures does not justify appropriation still stands.

The uniqueness of figures has nothing to do with whether they're open or closed. Your argument is like saying, "well how can this storm god from an African traditional religion be closed when Thor exists?"

The ATR god is closed because the people who whom that tradition belongs said so. If you want to worship a storm god, Thor is right there. Likewise, you are free to work with this folkloric version of Saint Lucy.

Lilith isn't closed because she's supposedly unique. That never had anything to do with it. In fact, "oh but this open figure and that closed figure are basically the same though, that means I'm entitled to the one you're claiming is closed" is the rhetoric of spiritual colonialism, used to justify the misrepresentation and commodification of spiritual figures from marginalized groups, to that group's detriment.

Now, not every Jew agrees that Lilith is closed, because Jews aren't a monolith. But I have seen no shortage of Jews arguing for Lilith as a closed figure, and I find their arguments pretty damn compelling

So, Christians have spent centuries digging into Jewish traditions to find something they could weaponize against Jews; EG, getting into Kabbalah to try and find places they could project Jesus so they could try and convince Jews to convert to Christianity. Something very similar is absolutely happening with the gentile Lilith worshipers. There's a strong tendency toward antisemitic conspiracy theory among them; EG, believing that patriarchy was a Jewish conspiracy that was later expressed through Christianity.

These people often claim that Lilith was this ancient mother goddess who was demonized by the Jews. They try to claim that these old mentions of lilitu are somehow evidence. In reality, ancient cultures in the Near East worshiped a number of mother goddesses (EG, Ninhursag), and none of whom were Lilith.

Many deities did get demonized at some point (EG, Astarte became Ashtoreth, and Baal became Bael), but this had nothing to do with a patriarchal conspiracy; rather it was a generalized demonization of rival gods. And Lilith was not among them, because Lilith was never a goddess.

In fact, I have yet to see a single gentile Lilith worshiper who isn't deep into conspiracy theories and doesn't quote pseudohistory of some kind. Not a single one. So yeah, I will continue taking the side of the Jews who say that Lilith should be closed, because I've seen the bullshit gentiles are pulling with her.

[my-pokemon-rambling-blog]

More champion headcannons because I haven’t posted in a while and my Wally draft is gone (thx tumblr)! Yay! These are more on the platonic side.

Most of my champion head cannons don’t really include Steven all that much. He’s too busy with playing with rocks to hang out with the others. Steven’s like that one friend who hangs out with you, but they barely talk at all. I should know, because I am that friend.

Wallace and Lance talk shit about Leon all the time. It’s because of his cape. Leon is too oblivious to know. They don’t talk to Leon unless it’s necessary. They sit on the other end of the table during Champion meetings too. They just sip their tea and judge silently. One time, Cynthia and Diantha came to Wyndon Stadium just to see Wallace and Lance stare at Leon. They 100% saw Lance and Wallace stare at Leon with murderous intent.

Wallace is trans no one can tell me otherwise. Wallace is mid-transition at the time of the games. I think Lance is intersex. There’s no logic to it, it just tickles a part of my brain. I don’t know much about intersex people, so I don’t want to go too in depth about it. Wallace definitely told Lance to get HRT because they both hate periods.

Cynthia is that one meme: “in the winter I like to wear a nice cozy black jacket. In the summer, I wear the same exact thing because I look good in black, and I’m willing to suffer.” And because Lance is everyone’s big brother, he tries to convince Cynthia to wear something white. It doesn’t work out. Diantha told Cynthia that she’d look good in white. Since Cynthia cannot say no to Diantha, Cynthia wore a white blouse with a floral skirt. Diantha went feral that day. Lance almost jumped off a cliff that day.

Wallace invites Diantha and Cynthia to have tea with them. He made mouth-watering sweets, and the two Champions devoured them in two minutes.

Lance is notorious for his hatred of the cold, and for some sick reason, Arceus made his birthday on the coldest day in the whole entire year. He hates it. He is big spoon until it gets colder, then he’s little spoon.

Steven is afraid of Gyarados, which is ironic since his closest friends have a dumb fuck amount of them. Wallace had to wait for two fuckin years to get a Feebass. Lance’s Kingdra keeps adopting magikarps, so Lance has no choice to catch them, so now he has 20% of the Gyarados population.

He also hates serpentine pokemon too. He almost never visits Blackthorn because Dratini and Dragonair are everywhere. The first time he visited, one of Lance’s Dratini somehow slithered into the bed he was sleeping in, so he screamed like a girl bloody murder. Lance came running in, finding Steven curled up in the corner of the room with a Dratini slithering closer and closer. Lance reminds Steven of it all the time.

When Wallace challenged Steven for the Champion title, Steven just gave him the title after Wallace sent out Milotic. Whenever Wallace says he wants to be Champion, he brings Milotic out to scare Steven into giving it to him.

Clair and Lisia like to torment Wallace and Lance for fun. Clair is Lisia’s best friend and partner in crime. Iris sometimes joins in too. Sometimes Iris enlists Zinnia’s help to include Steven in the torment.

Cynthia has a Lapras. I don’t know why I think this way. I just do.

Lance and Cynthia have this conspiracy theory that Will and Lucian are the same person. Turns out their distant relatives.

Sycamore had to grow up with two sisters: Diantha and Cynthia.