#and then proceeds to not gender me correctly once

[captain-hollis]

When the shift was so bad you've gotta listen to crazy train on repeat for an hour

[shiny-jr]

from DIASOMNIA

- Warning: Yes, this is still a yandere thing. You have been warned. Gender-neutral reader. 

- Characters: Malleus Draconia, Lilia Vanrouge, Silver, Sebek Zigvolt.

- Summary: (Continuation, after this “we just got a letter, wonder where it’s from”) You have barred them from entering the safety of Ramshackle Dorm, but they are determined to make their words reach you. Which is why the letters begin arriving at your doorstep.

- Note: This is just the first part, only with Diasomnia. I’ll post the rest later once its written. For now, I hope you enjoy this part! Oh, and this was inspired by the mention of letters @qierxing​‘s fic inspired by the whole imposter au idea. So yeah. Hopefully I caught all the mistakes in this post because I am not rereading all that again.

Diasomnia   |   Ignihyde

Among the first letters you pick is carefully sealed in a black envelope. You found it peculiar that Grim, who had offered to use his claws to open the envelopes, hadn’t been able to cause the slightest tear as if it were being protected by some magic. But it opened with ease during your first attempt to rip it open.

You didn’t care much for the wax family crest that had sealed it, or the black envelope itself. Maybe it would feel liberating to just set them all ablaze as soon as you finished skimming over the carefully written words.

To my dearest human,

I understand the pain I have caused you.

Ever since that moment I betrayed you, all I have seen in my vision and in my mind is your expression of terror. It tortures me. Your terror spurred by my actions and my very own hands. I am your most beloved and loyalest of companions in this world, and yet, had my retainers behind those doors not intervened, you would have been gone forever. And it would have been all my doing, all my fault.

I write this letter to apologize, but as I write this, I realize that there is no forgiving what has been done. Ever. No matter how I plead or what comes from my lips. But I will say this: there are no amount of words that can truly convey how sorry I am. This will haunt me for the remainder of my centuries of life.

Agonizing thoughts plague my mind and torment me at all hours of the day and night, at every and each moment. Even now, I reflect on everything I had done to harm you. While, the time I believed in those falsehoods was minuscule compared to the days others knew and acted upon it, the fact still stands that I was too easily deceived by mere rumors alone. I was blinded by my rage when I heard that someone dared to impersonate you and had been the probable cause of your vessel’s malfunction, that I did not even take a brief respite to consider the validity of the information that reached my ears.

Believe me, although I realize you have no reason to hold even a shred of faith in a single word I say and for that I would not blame you, but I will atone for the crimes I have committed. In any way possible. Even if it takes my entire lifetime, I will continue forward until I have achieved this goal and you may smile upon me once again. There is a human saying, which if I recall correctly I believe goes something like, forgive but never forget. Well, I would beg for forgiveness, while knowing full well that my misdeeds will never truly be forgotten. The harm I inflicted will leave scars that will never fully fade.

For every scratch my nails left on your delicate flesh, you may drive vines of the sharpest thorns against my own skin until blood pools all around me. For every bruise from my hand that tainted you, I would hand you an iron sword to use as you wish against me until you believe I’ve had enough. If it pleased you, I would even utilize my magic to transform into a figure with wings, which I would then proceed to sever the wings by my own hand and offer them to you on a silver platter.

Any punishment you can think of, I would readily accept.

Although living with the guilt of my mistakes and knowledge of the weight of my actions against you, is by far the most painful torture I’ve ever known.

If I do not receive word from you soon, I fear I may go insane with my own guilt. Yet I know I bring this upon myself. And if I were to go insane, if I was not insane this entire time already, you are all that would be in my thoughts. You are all that would remain in the part of my mind that is intact. You are currently and have been all that I think of, so perhaps my sanity is already long gone.

I would venture into the deepest crevices of hell and back, just to prove my worth to you. Even if I must be punished for the rest of my life, so be it. But I implore you to allow me to redeem myself, let yourself bear witness to the incredible feats I may accomplish in your name. Redemption... The thought of perhaps one day receiving the blessing of your smile and your grace once more in the near or distant future, is the light at the end of the tunnel in this dark period of my existence. I am yours. Whether you still desire me or not, I will forever be yours, and I will brave through trials of fire to demonstrate my eternal devotion to you.

Just know that I will do everything in my power to please you. Whether it be to fulfill the judgement you cast upon me, to demonstrate my worth and determination to achieve redemption, or simply because you command it so, it shall be done. 

For now, I will wait on your response and deliberate over my next course of action. Should you desire anything, anything at all, wether it be something as simple as traveling to the store for a purchase, you have a moment of recluse and desire company, or if you command me to move the island or clear the very heavens, all you must do is speak my name. Then, consider it done. Once my name is upon your lips, I will be there as the last syllable leaves your tongue. 

I will await the moment I am summoned.

Forever yours,

Malleus Draconia

That was... unnerving. Your hand unconsciously drifted up to the slight puncture wounds on your neck. They had long since dried, but you vividly remember feeling the thin trail of crimson being drawn and dripping down like a steady stream. 

You could remember the way Malleus withdrew as soon as he realized the truth, like he had been burned with his hands on you in that fashion. The blood, your blood, staining his sharpened nails. The red was deeper than any nail polish or ink. 

You were nearly sent spiraling, until you felt a tap and the texture of paper against your arm. When you glance down, you see Grim pressing his paws with another crumpled letter onto you. The ink on this letter is red, but the feline’s wide curious eyes are a glowing blue. 

“You okay? What’s so interesting about that wall you’re lookin’ at? You’re kinda just staring off into nothing there.” 

Offering a grateful nod to Grim who frowned worriedly, you accept the already opened envelope while tossing aside the letter from Malleus. “I’m good. Just... thinking.” 

Lifting a hand, you place your palm against his head and scratch the spot behind his ears. Grim lets out a content purr and holds a bag of junk food, which he probably found among the mountain of gifts, and curls up beside you. You continue the slow and soothing scratches as you use your freehand to unravel the letter Grim brought you from the towering stacks. 

This envelope was already cut open. It was a light brown and more square-shaped as thin rope kept it tied together. It had a mash of colorful strings that formed a messy bow to top it off. At least, you assumed it was meant to be a bow, but it looked more like a messy knot that would be impossible to untangle. Good thing it was already partially cut by Grim’s claws earlier. 

As mentioned, the ink was red, an interesting choice. While the handwriting was not as elegant as Malleus’ letter. Some words were written neatly, before falling off the line and blending with other words. Making it a bit difficult to read, but you managed. 

If you’re reading this, 

This means that I am not irredeemable in your eyes. 

Had I been beyond redemption, you would have not even opened this letter. If this was a lost cause, a merry dance, this paper would’ve been tossed into the trash without a second thought. But, my words have reached you. You’re reading this right now, aren’t you? It’s why I decided to write this. I could predict the actions you’d take. You are different from your vessel, but it’s only natural that you would act similarly to the silly little doll you controlled, the same doll that sparked this whole fiasco. 

I truly am so sorry if I frightened you. While I will admit, it was my intention to strike fear into your heart and use you to serve for another dubious purpose, that was when I hadn’t recognized you. Although, I know this doesn’t mean much to you, I figured I should be entirely honest to you. It’s the least I can do. I’m such a fool for being quick to believe the rumors like some sort of senseless child.

All I can do now, is remain true and offer up my loyalty. It’s nothing compared to the mistakes I made, and I’ve made plenty, but I know an apology will never suffice. So, even if you’re still uncertain about redemption, I’ll remain loyal. Among all the beings and creatures I’ve met in my lifetime, you remain an enigma. You’re human, but at the same time, you’re different. There continues to be so much I do not know of you. I wonder, could you hear me whenever I spoke to your plaything? Do you recall the stories I told, of my time as a reckless youth? Foolhardy, wild, that I was. But I was also fiercely loyal. For the Draconias, I razed down all foes like wheat in a field. 

Now that I consider it, perhaps it's best if you hadn’t heard me recount those tales. While I had been eager to share with you my experiences and act out my thrilling adventures, perhaps my story telling was much too graphic. I wouldn’t want the vivid details of bloodshed to be cause for alarm as our most recent encounter was far from pleasant. You have to forgive me, sometimes I get carried away when narrating my accomplishments and exploits. I’ll share more light-hearted memories with you the next time we meet. 

Our first meeting with your true self really went abysmally, didn’t it? I know that things never really go as planned, so I don’t bother planning such things in advance. But, I had pictured it to be a lovely moment. Silver and Sebek would look at you with shining eyes and proclaim their loyalty as they had practiced vows over and over again for such an occasion, I would get to embrace your true form and unlock your secrets, and of course Malleus would be truly content for once as he finally received the company he deserved. 

But, as expected, things didn’t go accordingly. 

Those three youths are miserable, thinking of the proper words to pen, a way to apologize for the suffering they’ve caused. But now, we are the ones suffering because we hurt you. 

They write and write, but tear their letters over and over again as they believe no words they’ve written so far are adequate. Soon they’ll realize that no words will ever be sufficient for an apology. Even if they were to create new words that are unheard of by any dictionary, it would not come close to being enough. That’s why I’ve decided to stick with this single attempt, because I already know that nothing I ever write will measure up to being acceptable. 

There is something about you that always leaves me bemused. Your grace left me feeling dizzy and giddy, like I was experiencing a little crush again, although this was much more intense than any crush. The truth about your vessel controlled by you, had me perplexed as I had never heard of such a thing. And well, the disastrous chase that followed your arrival... you know that part well and could assume how I feel about that from what I’ve told you. At present, all I can do is remain loyal, for what my loyalty is worth to you. Beyond that, despite having an abundance of experiences, there is no such situation that could have prepared me for this moment. 

Genuinely, I am stumped once again. I cannot even envision what can be done with my own two hands, that can be worthy of your attention once again and earn me redemption. But, you can be certain of one thing, and that is: my loyalty is undying. I still have a few years left in these old bones of mine, and I will use the rest of my life to serve you. 

Whether you want me or not. If you still want me, I will be of use to you. Whatever you are in need of, a soldier, a plaything, a companion, or even someone to take out your anger on. I shall be it. If you don’t want me, I will still be there. I will always be there to smile and lift your spirits like you once did for me through your doll. 

I eagerly wait for word from you. 

Until we meet again soon, 

Lilia Vanrouge

None of these letters were comforting in the slightest. In fact, they only placed you further on edge. For a moment, you considered stopping it here after only two and getting rid of the rest. 

Grim by now had settled in your lap, and looked up at you with those watchful blue eyes. Had he been staring at you the entire time? 

“Let me guess, they’re not taking it well?” 

“No, not at all.” You answer with a grimace. If this was how they were like now, you didn’t even want to know how they acted when they found out your vessel stopped working over a week ago. 

“Huh, sucks for them.” The feline stretched out, his claws poking out for a moment before quickly retracting as he plopped back down on his back with his stomach up. Maybe it was his own attempts to fill the silence, or to let you know you weren’t alone, but he eventually groaned. “Hey, read me one. I wanna know what they say.” 

Unable to say no to your companion, you nodded slowly and smiled weakly, “Alright, alright, let’s see what we have here...” 

You plucked out a random letter with neat packaging. However, just because the exterior was pretty, didn’t mean the interior message would be. You learned that already from the last two letters you had read. 

This envelope looked somewhat similar to the last one, square-shaped and tied closed with string. However, instead of the knot of ribbons on it, it held a simpler gift. The brown rope around it was tied in a neat bow, and between the string were lavender stems with a small branch of wild berries. 

Grim immediately indulged in the berries and the flowers, staining his little fangs and whiskers with the sweet sticky juice and purple petals. All the while exclaiming, “Oh, oh! I remember this letter. Some bird came to drop it and it flew away just before I could catch it...” 

A short laugh escaped your lips as you hear him. “So that’s why you were grumbling this morning.” 

Not wanting to be reminded again, he swat his paw at your nose as the feline hissed, “Shh! Just read already!” 

Dear player, 

I truly am deeply remorseful and I offer my sincerest apologies. 

I was to be a knight, that has been something I have strived for ever since I was a child. A knight not just to serve Malleus but to protect others, and eventually I discovered my purpose was to serve you as well. But... all I did was stand idly by and watch the torment. Shortly after meeting your vessel, I had promised to shield you from all danger. I broke that promise. 

I cannot imagine how frightened you must have been. Had just one person stop and thought things through, they may have realized the horrible mistake that was being made. Had I acted as soon as I felt the tug on my heart when I saw you weakened and on the dirt, I may have saved you from anymore pain. 

Those eyes, your eyes, I see them in my sleep. You were scared, and through your gaze you were pleading for help, were you not? I see it every time I close my eyes. You witnessed it yourself, the very moment when I had failed you. You were right there, so close I could have extended a helping hand. But my grief rendered me sightless, all I could think of in that moment is how my heart ached and how I longed to see you again. Even if it was through your vessel. The rumors didn’t quite make any sense to me, as I wondered how could anyone possibly be so cruel as to tear you away from us? 

Father had said that it would all be over soon. That capturing the imposter and bringing them to their knees, would make everything better. But when I saw you on the ground before we learned of your identity, I couldn’t help but wonder if this was alright. Would the player have wanted this? Would they have scorned upon witnessing the scene? Would this undoubtedly end the throbbing pain I felt in my heart? The pain was becoming unbearable, and I was not the only one to feel it. The news made little sense to me. Sebek insisted that it was true, and Father seemed to believe so as well. However, that is no excuse for how I went along as if it were okay. 

You were innocent and helpless, you, the player, not only witnessed the scene but were the victim. I’m so sorry, I should have done something... If it were the only way to gain your forgiveness, I would spend every moment of my waking hours writing letters of apology. To do so I would keep myself awake for as long as humanely possible. If asked, I would use every moment to pen these letters, each different from the last. Although after several attempts in redoing this single letter, I realize that it would be a pointless endeavor. 

After reflecting, the only way to make up for what I have do is be patient. 

Be patient and await for word from you. I cannot force you, I cannot pressure you, I can only pause and prepare myself to do whatever I must in order to earn back your grace. 

Please, do not keep me waiting too long. I know I have no right to ask you this. I’m willing to wait years if needed, but part of me has this fear that I will never regain a spot near your heart until I’m frail and feeble with age. Rest assured, even in old age, I would be willing to be your knight. Even if my bones ached, I would raise my sword and shield. If I couldn’t use my weakened legs, I would call upon a horse to be my steed. And if I were to become magicless, I would use the remainder of my physical strength to serve you. 

If I may be honest with you? I have no idea what to do. Yes, I said I would wait, but what else can I do? What can I do to eventually secure a place beside you, if it were possible? In times of trouble I normally turn to Lilia and Malleus for advice, however, I am a bit unsettled by their approach to this delicate matter. Truthfully, I am anxious, but while they share the sentiment, they are oddly confident that things will turn out alright in the end. I am unsure how they can muster the self-assurance to quell their fears. Maybe they know something that I do not, and have decided not to share this secret for now... 

Nevertheless, for now I’ll eagerly anticipate the day we can reunite just as I have dreamed. I greatly look forward to the second where not only I can see you smile once again and your eyes might finally look at me with content, but also the moment where all those I know might get the opportunity to be in your peaceful grace. 

I’ve dragged this letter on for too long. If you were to take something away from this letter, let it be this: I will carry out your wishes. No matter what you may think of me, whether it be a positive or negative image in your mind, I will continue forward in your name. Even if you think me unfit for the title of knight, then consider me a humble servant instead. Nothing will shake my commitment, and I will do whatever it is you ask. 

This is a pledge that will not be broken. 

Cordially, 

Silver

This letter felt a bit lighter than the others. Still, it was slightly intense in its own way, but it was nowhere near as extreme as the previous two were. And, maybe you had a better opinion on Silver, not because he was gentle with his words but because he was one of the very few who hadn’t threatened you, directly harmed you, or treated you cruelly. 

But! He didn’t get a free pass just because of that. Yes, he may not have directly caused any harm, but he didn’t exactly help you either. 

Grim had taken the letter from you, and inspected the paper in his paws. He held it above his head, scrunching up his nose a bit as he looked it over. “I dunno... he’s okay.” 

At that, you roll your eyes a bit as a smirk crept up from the corner of your mouth. “You’re not just saying that because his letter came with a snack?” 

“No! You think me easy to bribe? I think not! It would take a whole bucket full of berries just to get me to even discuss it. Then, I’d turn them down and take the berries anyways!” The feline proclaimed his brilliant plan should that situation ever arise. Maybe the gifts you allowed him to take were starting to get to his head. “But... he could be worse. Silver, as dumb as he was like everyone else, he did hear me out after they separated us.” 

Silver did that? If that were true, it’s possible that he wasn’t as bad as the others who had wronged you.

“That’s... good to know.” You murmur as you pluck up another random envelope from the pile. 

The last envelope you pick up before you planned to take a break was surprisingly plain. It was just that. A plain white envelope, sealed by green wax with what looked like a family crest that depicted a creature with fangs and scales. One of the corners was crinkled, as if it was gripped too tightly there. 

As soon as you slid out the folded letter, you were bombarded by the ink. Whoever had wrote this, seemed like they applied too much force. This caused certain parts of some letters to be too round and heavy with ink that made those bits feel damp and stain your fingers the slightest bit. Like whoever wrote this, placed just as much pressure with their hands on the pen gliding across the page, as much pressure as they felt weighing on their mind. 

Great Player, 

As I pen this, I am on my hands and knees.

I have prepared a multitude of letters which I will send daily, so that now and in the future you will continue to hear my apology and know I truly mean it. One admission of regret is not enough. An apology is only an acknowledgment of an offense, it does not absolve one of their wrongdoings. I know this! So, I, Sebek Zigvolt, will atone by any means necessary! 

To you, the player who I wronged and deserves nothing but happiness and perfection, I give my deepest sincerest profuse apology. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m SORRY. Right now when I look at my hands that I use to write, I’m reminded of the vicious way I grabbed you like some... heathen! These hands sullied your flawless self, and for that alone I will never forgive myself!

Had it not been for the wise words of Master Lilia and the bothersome yet logical reasoning from Silver, I would have been at your door everyday, every hour, begging for a second chance. In the midst of brainstorming, I presented my idea of crawling on hands and knees, from Diasomnia to the Ramshackle Dorm, to deliver the letter myself. Then, I would display whatever cuts or bruises formed on my palms and knees which I would receive from the rocky roads or thorns, that way you may see my devotion was true and no lengths are too great when it comes to you! No matter the pain or burden! The idea seems to appeal to Lord Malleus, but I was told that it comes off as too extreme...

But! I beg to differ!! I only consider it so that you may understand what I feel, so that you might comprehend the things I would do for you, and receive me back in your good graces! Additionally, delivering the letter in this manner would cause me as much or more physical pain than I caused you! It is a shame that things have come to this. I had wished so much for our first proper meeting to be one of joy where you might accept me as your knight! In spite of that, I will not falter in shame! If I were to deliver the following letters in that method I had detailed earlier, I would wear the scars proudly! It would be physical proof of my faithfulness towards you! 

I am sorry, and I will continue to say it. Perhaps, this may be presumptuous of me, but if you consider it, Diasomnia did not torment you nearly as long as any other insolent dorm had! And! We retainers accompanied Lord Malleus every day to check on the wellbeing of your vessel, and watch over it while investigating various possible approaches on how to revive Yuu. We diligently did this until the moment we encountered your true self! 

I swear to you, no one shall harm you from this moment forth! 

From now on, I’ll march forward and see to it that you are never hurt ever again! This is something I know that my fellow dormmates will tirelessly work toward as well. 

Have you realized that we have been guarding you and the serenity of your dorm in the past days? Have you not thought it strange that none have come to needlessly pester you? Yes, that is all thanks to the efforts of those in Diasomnia! Even when you do not realize it, we are insuring your welfare and the tranquility you require to recover! Of course, as much as I desperately want to inform you of the details, I will not. It is best you don’t know. 

Now, I must be honest with you. Originally, I had planned this letter to be much longer and have contents that would have been much different than what you are currently reading. I aimed to be honest in my feelings! But before I could sign off on the original draft, I realized that the others may be in the right. It is possible that our devotion, my devotion, may come off as disquieting if I were completely sincere. I’ve had to restrain myself on many occasions, reminding myself to at least appear collected and controlled. That is not as easy as it sounds! 

How could it be, when the one I must suppress my emotions and actions for, is you? That’s as if asking to repress part of my very soul and heart! I absolutely detest hiding it!! But when I remember this is for you and your own comfort, it becomes bearable. I can only hope that soon, very soon, I might be able to unveil my true sentiments towards you! As intense and extreme as they may be! 

It seems that I’m nearing the word limit that they imposed. Once again, I apologize. I’ll have to contemplate new ways to write ‘sorry.’ I wish I could write a million more words for you! But even a million words wouldn’t be anywhere near a satisfactory amount for me to detail how much I revere you! And it would take more than another million words for me to write a full apology, but even then I wouldn’t be satisfied! No single letter is adequate enough, so be prepared to receive the rest I have written! 

I will make sure they are delivered posthaste! 

Faithfully, 

Sebek Zigvolt 

Great... you’re back to being unnerved again. 

There was something about them all being so weirdly obsessed, but in vary different ways. Malleus and Lilia puzzled you, they had you feeling the most uneasy by far. Maybe it had to do with the fact that they were both not human, they were arcane beings with enigmatic personalities and objectives that were incomprehensible to you. 

Out of the four, Silver was the only one that was fully human like yourself, but even he was a bit of a mystery as he was raised by the fae. It was hard to be wary of him, which was probably because your distrust and fear of him wasn’t as intense as it was towards the others due to his good nature and lack of actions he took during the whole disaster. 

As for Sebek, well, he was unnerving in his own right but it was nowhere near on the level that Malleus and Lilia were on. At the very least he wasn’t a complete mystery to you. It was easy to figure out his intentions, because he either said them or wore them on his sleeve. 

Your mind was spinning as you looked over the four letters, filled with lines upon lines and more lines of pages. In that moment your breath quickened as you noticed the cloudy sky outside. For a brief second, you feared you would see that familiar flash of green lightning, taking you back to that dark day when you nearly died. It’s like you could feel Sebek’s hands tightly gripping the back of your skull that forced you against the earth, you saw Silver’s sorrowful gaze that spoke a thousand words you didn’t yet understand, you heard Lilia’s words hinting to a doomed fate of becoming some lifeless doll, and god, you couldn’t forget him even if you wanted to. Malleus. He was the worst of all. You felt his nails and fingers constricting around your neck and squeezing out all the air, you saw his haunting green eyes with those slit pupils as he glowered at you with such anger and hate, and you heard what you had thought would be the last words you ever heard come from his lips––

“Hey!” 

You were torn out of those dark thoughts by the feline in your lap. A concerned frown tugged at Grim’s lips, but once he saw he had your attention, he mustered a slight grin as he held up what looked like an armful of snacks. At least, as much as he could carry in his small paws. From his grin, you could see his little fangs still covered in the remnants of the berries and flower petals.

“Look, I found your favorite! This is getting boring, so let’s just take a break!”

[chiipay]

HAIIIII

taking requests!? cool! ur the first person ive requested to on tumblr for a fanfic :DDD

can i request nagi, bachira, and isagi comforting, their s/o? i want the reader to have feminine traits but i want them to be gender-neutral if that makes sense-

-K :3

Uhh I live- sorry for months of not doing this- I uhh.... die and then live once again:) I'm not confident if I can represent correctly about the feminine traits but I'll try.

Also- I have no idea what the heck I am writing...

Tw: I think I accidentally made ooc Isagi- I forgot how his personality works-

Plot: gone too tired, you cried. (Me too honestly)

-- Nagi

Nagi keeps glancing at your curled up form and then proceeds to play his game on his phone- he's not heartless- he is. He's just really bad at comforting someone...well- at least that's what Reo told him. Here you are now, curling up into a ball at the corner of Nagi's apartment.

He looks back and forth from his game to your sad form of human, he's not good at comforting but it was him who's the one to commit the relationship in the first place with you. He can't leave his significant other depressing while he dazed off in his world, can't he?

He put down his phone, pausing his game which was a big sacrifice he did for you and he deserves a lot of affection for it, getting up from his comfy couch as he walks up to you, he crouches down to your height which still makes him seem taller, patting your head makes you raise your head a bit from your knees to look at him.

He looks at you, as he opens his arms widely, without a second thought, you latch your into him as if you guys could mix together in a blender, Nagi securely holds you up and walks back towards his lovely couch, picking up his pause game on his phone then proceeded to lay down with you on the couch.

Putting his head on top of yours as the silent room is now filled with gunshots that came out of Nagi's phone. ”mhmm...sorry, don't know how to help.” he pressed light kisses on top of your head while muttering a small sorry in process, your fist ruining his hoodie as you tighten your grip on him.

” you sucks at this, don't you Nagi?” leaning towards the crook of his neck, every breath you take tickles his skin to the core. ” I know.” he wiped a small shed of tears that runs down to your cheeks, ” and it's okay, because you understand.” he said flatly, his face remains in a casual look as he's not an expressive person, you couldn't tell if he's being considerate of you or not.

” I'm here, you're here. It will be fine.”

---Isagi

Isagi finds you crying in the worst situation ever, as it makes that even worse than ever when he doesn't know how to comfort you, he's so focused on football that he has no idea what to do when you cry for the first time.

” I'm fine...” you wipe your tears that keep falling out of your eyes, warm hands touching your face as Isagi pushes your own hand away and he wipes out the tears with a napkin instead.

You tried to cover your face which directly got pushed by Isagi's gentle hands that cradle your face as if it's fragile, ” there's nothing to be ashamed of.” his eyes soften when he sees you getting more embarrassed about being taken care of by the players that you supposed to be taking care of.

Kurona patted your head in comfort as he handed you his water bottle for you to drink, ” no, no tears.” you took the bottle and thanked him, then he left you two alone in an awkward silence.

” I'm sor-"

” don't be.”

” okay.”

-- bachira.

”(name)~” bachira hugs you from behind which scared the sh- out of you, you look at his cheeky face in a tired expression which he then returned with concern looks on his face.

He cupped your face in a loving way, his concern looked turned back into a big smile as he gave you a big hug, ” it's okay, I'm here.” he smiled, nuzzling into your hair, when he raised his head to see your face in expectation of your happy face, but all he got is you sobbing now with tears streaming down your cheeks like a waterfall.

” b-bachira....” you sob loudly, then you press your head deeper into his chest, crying like there's no tomorrow, ”woah! You really put an act earlier~” he giggled, he lifted you up from the ground then went to some more of a quiet room to have a talk with you.

[nothorses]

An actual conversation I had at my local lgbt center

Me: no one uses the correct pronouns for me anyway so just take your pick and I'll live with it

Staff: its really important to us that we use the correct pronouns for everyone

Me: I've been coming here for years, I know that the right pronouns will not be used and by not saying what pronouns I use incan at least pretend that I'm being misgendered because no one knows what pronouns to use rather than because no one sees me as my actual gender. Please just let me have that.

Staff: I know in the past it's been that way in the past, but I can assure you that we're improving, and everyone here will do the best we can to ensure we use the correct pronouns

Me: fine, I use he/him pronouns

Staff: thank you *proceeds to use they/them for me all day, not once was I actually gendered correctly*

It's like that everywhere. I went to pride with 4 separate pronoun pins on my chest and was she/her or they/them all day. Not one person used the correct pronouns. Including the person I was buying the fourth pin from.

Oh yeah, it's absolutely a common experience.

What frustrates me the most, I think, is when I initially pass, get he/him'd effortlessly and always, and later come out on my own- meaning they literally wouldn't have known if I hadn't told them- and suddenly I never hear he/him again.

And not just from conservatives; from people who actively and frequently talk about trans allyship of their own accord.

I got she/her'd all the time back when I was trying to get they/them'd; I could pass that off as like, "forgetting" and defaulting to appearance-based assumptions. Still shitty, probably more of a choice than I was assuming (for my own sake), but also like, it felt much more passive to me. I could kinda handwave it and go, "as long as you're trying, it's fine!"

This feels almost malicious. And I know it isn't, but I also know it's not just forgetting- in that moment that they think about what pronouns to use for me, there is hesitation. They ask themselves questions that they never asked when they thought I was cis. Ultimately, they decide they just can't bring themselves to use pronouns for me that they found effortless before they knew.

Because I'm trans, and that has fundamentally changed the way they see me, and these are people who will never even acknowledge that. They'll just go on thinking they're doing a great job as trans allies, likely even if I have the presence of mind to catch and correct it when it does happen around me.

[sweetadonisbutbetter]

Ur so pretty (WIP)

UPDATE AS OF 4/2/24: IF UR READING THIS BUT HAVENT SEEN THE WHOLE FIC HERE IT IS- it is also on AO3 on the same name. Thank you!!

A/N: hiiI!!! just want to note a few things before you proceed- this is meant to be read as a wlw. Tav isn't described necessarily so it can be read as a gn tav or even a male. but I wrote this with the intention of Tav being femme presenting. I do try to avoid using "he said/she said/they said" so if you see that please tell me so I can fix that since I do want this to be as gn as possible in case you don't imagine a femme Tav. also tav's gender really isn't relevant to what I am planning for the later part, same goes for tav's race.

tav is also meant to be a selunite, but I don't know a whole lot about it, I am actively reading a wiki on it but again, can't make everything lore accurate lolol. hopefully I was able to portray the character correctly! another thing to note is that this is the inbetween of her first romance scene but not in act 2 (aka post tiefling party). so at this point tav and shadowheart kissed. anything else that needs to be adressed i cannot possibly think of so with that, enjoy!!

Upon waking up, you already felt that it was going to be a long day, one that was longer than usual. The sores from numerous fights and hours of walking were ever present from the moment you opened your eyes; the feeling of the Astarion’s fangs wringing your neck numb. You mentally check off the numerous problems before you get out of your tent and set off for the day. Upon leaving the dimly lit tent, you were blinded slightly by the morning light. The smell of breakfast filled the air as idle chatter continued. You take a moment to look at your companions. Gale was the one cooking, making idle chatter with Wyll and Karlach, the latter who was most likely the one who started the fire. Lae’zel was by herself, sharpening one of her many swords. Astarion emerges from his tent, also having just woken up. You continue to scan the camp looking for someone in particular.

‘No sign of her…’ You think to yourself, pouting slightly. From the corner of your eyes, you see Astarion approaching you. Sighing, you can already tell it was going to be a long day. 

“Glad to see you didn’t die last night.” He greets with a smirk. You look at him, already feeling the regret of letting him feed and an oncoming headache. You pinch the bridge of your nose, hoping it will relieve some tension. 

“Well if someone didn’t take any more than he should have, I wouldn’t have passed out.” You quip, to which Astarion lets out a laugh. 

“I did not take any more than I normally do. You just lost a lot of blood yesterday.” He says as he crosses his arms and shifts to the side. You look at him blankly for a moment, thinking if it would be worth it to put a stake in his heart. Listing the pros and cons, it seems that keeping him alive has more pros shockingly. Sighing once more, which was something that happened a lot when Astarion was around, you cast lesser restoration and begin to walk towards Gale, Karlach, and Wyll. However, before you can even approach the trio, you see Shadowheart emerge from her tent.

Your heart skips a beat as you look at her from afar. From the moment you had seen her while on the nautiloid, you had some sort of feelings stirring for her. Just a glance at her tells you how much of a beauty she is. The way her onyx hair framed her face, her braid that swished and would often rest on her shoulders, and the soft makeup that furthers her beauty in a way that feels almost godlike. Not to mention her eyes. The soft hazel green stood out with her darker eyeshadow, luring in the very person who looked into them. However, it wasn’t just her physical beauty that lured you in, it was the subtle beauty that seemingly showed when she wasn’t paying attention.  The soft smile that creeps up her face when you were swarmed by children at the grove, or how she plays with Scratch when she thinks no one is paying attention. You would often find yourself looking forward to fights, just to get injured so she could heal you, watching how her hands would tenderly cover the wound. In essence, her mannerisms, voice, and beauty have bewitched you, terribly. Often you were left lying awake late at night, thinking back on any conversation or memories you have of her. 

Since the tiefling party a few nights ago, you have had numerous things to think of. Truthfully, you were elated that you had agreed to a drink with her, since in your mind it showed that she had a fraction of attraction towards you. While it was hard to tell how she truly felt since she was sharran and they were sworn to secrecy; you did not need words to know that she enjoyed the moment you two shared. The kiss you two shared. The morning after you two had talked about it, and she agreed that there was indeed something between the two of you. However, soon after she began to withdraw herself from you. She would avoid being alone with you, cut the conversation short, and even volunteer to stay behind at camp. It hurt to see her detach herself from any social interaction with you. You even knew that she was avoiding only you, catching glimpses of her talking to the others. However, you found it better to give her her space, something that she appreciated in the past, though it was showing to be harder than you wanted it to be. 

“You know, it is rude to stare.” A voice cuts you out of your train of thought. Blinking, you look at the voice and see that it is Astarion. Confused as to what he is talking about, you give him a look. He rolls his eyes and smacks his teeth. “You have been staring at Shadowheart’s tent for a good while, my friend. A bit too long, might I add.”

Quietly, you let out an ‘oh’ before you turn towards your tent. You decide to start getting ready for the day, no longer hungry. Stripping your camp wear and donning your armor, you mentally summon all your courage so you can ask Shadowheart to accompany you, Gale, and Karlach. Finishing the knot of your boots, you equip your weapons and leave your tent, the blinding rays of the sun stinging your eyes for a brief moment.

‘Moonmadein please guide me.’ You utter in your thoughts before you make your way to Gale and Karlach. Even though you were nowhere near them, Karalach seemed to notice you were heading their way. Turning her head from her conversation with Gale, she makes eye contact with you. Her face seemingly lights up as small flames rise out of her skin.

“Mornin’ soldier!” She hollers. Gale says something to her in a quiet tone, one that you can’t hear. Whatever he told her caused the flames on her to diminish. Looking back at you, she lets out a slightly nervous chuckle and says, “Sorry about that. Just excited to get on the road again.” 

“No worries, and good morning to you Karlach. You too Gale.” You reassure Karlach quickly before you greet the wizard. Gale smiles in return and greets a quick ‘morning’ before leaving, presumably to get his stuff for the road. You look back to Karlach and ask, “Have you seen Shadowheart?”

“Oh, I think I saw she went with Scratch into the woods,” Karlach says, her mood seemingly more down. She hesitates for a moment, before asking “Why?”

“I just want to see if she is us on the road. It has been a bit since she left camp.” You explain, hoping that you weren't evident in your real reason for talking to her. Truthfully you weren’t telling a full lie, you did want to know if she wanted to leave camp for a while. You also just wanted a moment alone with her, in case she didn’t want to go. However before anything else could be said, the bushes rustled slightly. You and Karlach turn to the noise, however, you don’t need to go and investigate since Scratch jumps from the bushes and runs toward you. He jumps onto your chest, tackling you to the ground before he starts to lick at your face. Laughing at the slightly ticklish feeling, you try to move him off of you, not too keen on smelling like dog breath or even having slobber on you. Thankfully he gets off with ease and goes to bother you someone else. Still chuckling, you get up from the ground, with the help of Karlach who is laughing with you. The rustling of leaves happens once more, catching your attention once more. This time it was Shadowheart who emerged from the woods. You briefly make eye contact with her, your heart skips a beat and you shift to move towards her. Though it seemed she noticed you moving, since she looked away first and headed back to her tent, not even uttering a greeting or looking back. Your shoulders sag, clearly dejected at her avoidance. ‘I can’t be like this all day. We have to move forward.’ You think to yourself, quickly shaking the feeling and standing up straighter, putting on the front that you were not bothered by it. 

“It seems like she has no intent on leaving today. I suppose we could drag Astarion with us.” You jest lightly to Karlach. Wanting to leave sooner, you readjust your pack and look for Astarion. Thankfully, he seemed to have read your mind and was already in his gear. You look for Gale briefly and see that he is equally as ready. With a nod, the four of you leave camp and begin the day.

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hi Cas, I had a question. Sorry, I know you get a lot of these, I'm just not sure where else to turn right now haha.

I'm nonbinary. I've used they/them pronouns for four years now, and I came out to all of my close friends and changed my pronouns on my socials just under a year ago (I'm currently experimenting with they/he, so we'll see where that goes.) My friends have all been super supportive, even the ones who didn't really understand did their best to support me, and I really appreciated it.

The problem lies with my mum. I've tried to come out to her twice. The first time, I couldn't physically get the words out. It's like I freeze, and I just feel so petrified. We have had multiple debates/arguments surrounding trans rights and specifically JKR's viewpoint. My mum isn't exactly a rampant transphobe, she just doesn't get it, and I don't know how to make her understand.

The second time I came out, I did it over text so that I could get the words out. It was after one of these arguments, and she was sending me a message saying I got too het up and made her feel guilty. I replied by apologising but then saying it meant so much to me because I'm nonbinary. She completely skimmed over that part of the message, and for a while I wasn't even sure she had read it, because she kept misgendering me and referring to me as her daughter.

I don't even remember how we got to the conversation, but in one of our most recent back and forths of she sends me an article about JKR and I get upset, she told me that I need to 'stop with all of this nonsense about gender.' It stung a lot, and I really wasn't sure if she meant my gender specifically, or my feelings surrounding trans rights (or just us not being treated like people in the uk).

It made me wonder if it's even worth coming out to her again. I just have a feeling that it isn't going to stick. If you asked any of the trans people that she works with, they'd say that she was nothing but supportive, even if she gets it wrong sometimes, but it doesn't feel like that to me. I genuinely feel frozen with fear at the concept of telling her because of the conversations we've had, and I'm moving out for uni in September anyway. I just don't know how much longer I can deal with the constant misgendering. She has never once referred to me properly.

Idk, I'm kind of at a loss now, so I guess I'm asking what I could possibly do about it?

Hi hon <3

I feel like I first need to give you a thousand hugs and say our mums are very similar. So...guess we both need hugs, lol.

I think you have come out to your mom. Twice. She just isn't listening. Why waste your breath by doing it a third time? Your mom is making it very clear that she doesn't respect what you are asking for (respect, being correctly identified).

In the most gentle way, your mom is showing you who she is. I think your next step is to figure out how you want to proceed with that information.

I'm so sorry that she's not being the mom you deserve <3

Naming you frozen anon <3

[en-vyious]

HIII I SAW UR REQUEST R OPEN SO I JUST WANTED TO ASK IF UR OK WITH ME ASKING IF I COULD HAVE HC'S FOR A TRANSMASC READER WHO HASN'T TRANSITION BUT WANTS TO BUT THEYRE AFRAID OF COMING OUT

characters I want is:Nico, Ace, Charles and Maybe david

but if u want one you could go for nico

ALSO NO PRESSURE!!

Comforting Comings

Nico; Ace; Charles; David x Reader (Seperate)

Hello! Thank you for requesting anon! I hope this lives up to your expectations!

Notes: This’ll sort of be friends to lovers I guess? Like you’re both great friends but want to be more. Also, This’ll take place in the killing game. I also don’t have much experience writing for transmasc or transfemme so sorry if this isn’t very accurate!

Extra: He/They pronouns; Friends to Lovers; Nickname of ‘Darling,’ ‘Love.’

Backstory: Growing up, you’ve never felt completely comfortable in your own body. So, after changing up how you express yourself, you started feeling more comfortable. You were even going to go further in your transition. But now, you’re stuck in this killing game, you’ll have to come out to someone, so why not your best friend! (and maybe more..)

Nico with a Reader who’s coming out as Transmasc!

When you first come into they’re room to talk, they’re extremely a little worried!

But when you come out they’re SUPER supportive about it!

They feels a lot more closer to you knowing you both have a somewhat familiar experience regarding your identity!

I like to think that they occasionally messes up and then they stutter a lot trying to say an apology!

“A-Ahh! S-S-Sorry Y/n! I-I messed up again!”

(I’m a Nico Apologist don’t attack them)

If y’all do get into a relationship during this time, they’re even more careful/defensive than before.

“D-Darling? O-Oh um..May i call you darling? Rose and Levi have made breakfast, we should go eat, love..“

Ace with a reader who’s coming out as Transmasc!

(I don’t know how to write ace help)

Lowkey, I feel like he wouldn’t completely understand the concept at first-

But once you explain it to him he’s a lot more understanding and supportive, but he doesn’t really show it

“Oh damn, that’s cool I guess.”

BUT WAIT, HE STARTS DEVELOPING FEELINGS FOR YOU!

and then he proceeds to have a mid-life crisis because “loving someone the same gender as you is wrong!” (✨forbidden love✨)

but then he accepts his feelings and confesses then you two make out or something

After that, he’s VERY adamant on making sure people address you correctly!

“HEY?! They’re pronouns are He/They mind you!”

Charles with a reader who’s coming out as Transmasc!

He’s taken aback, but overall not too surprised

“I thought so, I was wondering when you were going to talk about it. I’m glad you trust me enough with this.”

When you confess, he smiles, just a bit, not enough for you to notice though.

He’s very supportive and willing to do anything to make sure you feel comfortable.

At first, you think he’s just being a good friend, until you see the blush on his cheeks. That’s when you start thinking..

He notices your face, and then just confesses to you on the spot.

So congrats! Y’all are dating now!

“Y/n, I love you, and I know these are hard times, but I’ll do anything to make you happy.”

David with a reader coming out as Transmasc!

Even if he’s a little insane, he makes you feel so loved!

As you talk to him, he listens very attentively.

Truthfully, in the back of his mind, he thinks about using this to manipulate you somehow.

But then, he decides against it. You’re too important to him. Wait, What?!

Oh no, he’s fallen in love! This wasn’t suppose to happen. But maybe, he can come to terms with this.

“Oh, Y/n, I love you no matter your gender. You’re beautiful!”

If you start feeling insecure, he’ll smother you with kisses and cuddle you like there’s no tomorrow.

“Y/n, I want you to know that there’s nothing that could change how I feel about you, absolutely nothing.”

My first request! Thank you anon! Always remember to take care of yourself. Love ya!

[mariacallous]

In July, the Russian government passed legislation banning gender transition (or “sex changes,“ as it appears in the law). Now, it’s illegal for transgender people in Russia to change the gender marker on their official documents, legally purchase necessary (and, during certain stages of transition, lifesaving) medications, or adopt children and be their legal guardians. Furthermore, the government can now annul the marriages of people who have changed their gender marker — even if they changed it before the law passed. With all of these new restrictions in place, it’s no surprise that many trans Russians are trying to get out of the country. To learn how this new reality has affected them, Meduza spoke with two trans people who left Russia and one who’s currently planning his escape.

Jay Alberg

27-year-old transgender man. Moved to Germany from Petrozavodsk.

I moved to Hamburg in late 2021 as a European Solidarity Corps (ESC) volunteer. I had originally planned to return to Russia, but after the start of the full-scale invasion, I decided to stay in Germany. At migration services, they invited me to apply for asylum as a transgender person from Russia, but instead I obtained the status of freelancer and planned to stay in Germany even longer to work as a project manager.

I started hormone therapy and surgical transition in 2020 [while still in Russia] and changed my documents in the summer during the pandemic. At that point, it was easier [than in other countries], because abroad, transitioning can take more than a year. In Germany, for example, it takes around two years for a psychiatrist to give you a referral for hormone therapy and changing your gender marker. 

In Russia, however, my transition went really quickly because I hadn’t been seeing a psychiatrist. The commission [in Moscow] issued me a certificate and I could proceed with my medical transition. It ended up taking me a year because of some financial difficulties.

In Russia, buying testosterone is a complicated process. Since it’s classified as a potent substance, the only way to purchase it legally is with a prescription from a pharmacy. Because of these requirements, you often see it on the black market, especially for bodybuilders. Not everyone knows how to prescribe it correctly, so I had to keep going back and forth between [the pharmacy] and the doctor to make sure they wrote my prescription properly.

When I moved, one of the most pressing questions was how to transport my medication; I wasn’t sure how quickly I could find a doctor who would write me a prescription for testosterone. I translated all my documents and prescriptions so that, once I was abroad, there would be no questions. In the end, no one asked about medication. 

Although doctors are not supposed to prescribe drugs long-term (prescriptions are for a maximum of 10-12 weeks), they gave me two prescriptions for six months. The doctor did it out of sympathy. However, [this amount of these drugs abroad] is still formally considered contraband and you can run into trouble for transporting illicit drugs.

People who decide to transition in Germany first need to acquire [legal] status. Only then can they start making document changes [relating to their gender]. Right now, there is a new proposed law that would make this process easier. Earlier, the process [of gender transition in Germany] went through the court system, which would then appoint a psychiatric expert. If the proposed self-ID law passes, a person won’t need to present an expert reference to the court, they’ll just have to go to there local registry office.

I am in contact with some of my [trans] friends [in Russia] who are planning to leave now, and I’m helping them find information about relocating. They either think, “what do I do, where do I run?” or start to worry that there is nothing and no one waiting for them abroad. You hear this a lot from young people who say they aren’t confident about their abilities, don’t speak another language, and don’t have any savings. It doesn’t help that the transgender community is an economically disadvantaged one; trans people often run into problems with employment and gender dysphoria can interfere with the ability to build connections with others, ruin self-esteem, and cause other social problems.

Theona

32-year-old transgender woman. Moved to Kyrgyzstan from Moscow.

My queer identity was just one of the reasons I decided to leave, but it was by far the most significant. The others were related to my political actions and protest, which I, [as an artist], have been involved with since 2011.

In a sense, I’m one of the lucky ones. I was never arrested [at protests] and never faced major repercussions. But not long before the war started, when there was “Bloody January” in Almaty, Kazakhstan, I got the sense that I had to go out and do another single-person picket protest against the deployment of Collective Security Treaty Organization (CSTO) forces in Kazakhstan. I understood that it was dangerous, but I went anyway.

I parked myself in front of the Kazakh embassy [in Moscow] for just 30 seconds and someone grabbed me, searched me, and immediately made up some story that I “participated in a large-scale protest.” They made up a case that included my incident and those of other people who were also protesting [that day] at different times and places.

In the end, I was charged with a misdemeanor and fined. Then the cops started coming by my parents’ house. They tried to figure out where I was and what I was doing, and to carry out some kind of instructional conversation with my family. Since they came with incorrect documentation (it had my name listed as “Oleg Fyodorovich” instead of “Fyodor Olegovich”), my parents said, “Nobody by that name lives here.”

While all of this was going down, the war started. Some artists I know started a petition vowing to not work with institutions that didn’t condemn the invasion of Ukraine, and I signed on. This made some of the signatories “prey” for FSB officers. They came for my friend and her parents, asking questions like whether they knew these people, what type of work their daughter does, where is she, etc. I don’t know exactly what kind of pressure the FSB put on the petition’s authors — they didn’t discuss it for their own safety — but some left immediately while others hid in other people’s apartments.

On 24 February [2022], my friend and I painted [antiwar] slogans on our clothes — if you don’t have the strength to speak, at least you can show how you feel about what’s going on. We went out into public wearing these clothes and people started asking us, “How are you not afraid?” And the worst part is, [after that], I became seriously afraid.

Then came the problems with work. Out of all the institutions I worked with, the only ones that came out against the war were Moscow’s Meyerhold Center and [the independent theater] Teatr.doc. But while the authorities found it too difficult to do anything to Teatr.doc — they already forced it to move multiple times, froze its accounts, and broke in to one of its plays, but it’s nevertheless still around — the Meyerhold Center was shut down.

In addition to that, there was another issue: I am a reserve lieutenant and I was worried I would get called up for service. Not long before the war [started], my foreign passport expired and I didn’t want to renew it because of bureaucratic difficulties. [In March 2022], I moved to Kyrgyzstan. It was important for me to be with close friends, and in Kyrgyzstan, mainly thanks to the efforts of [artist] Chingiz Aidarov and my friends from [the Bishkek-based experimental art collective] Theater 705, I quickly found “my” people.

The irony is that I lived for many years in a country that had a relatively liberal legal framework regarding gender transition, but I didn’t start undergoing transition until I was in [Kyrgyzstan], where changing one’s gender marker became illegal in 2020. Transition procedures themselves, though, are allowed here.

It took about six months to resolve the issues related to my medical transition. I had to find a specialist and undergo screenings. I’m only in my third month of hormone therapy right now. In Kyrgyzstan, there are no good hormone treatments with “pure” dosages, so transfeminine people here mainly transition with the help of contraceptives. You can mitigate the process with the help of an endocrinologist, but at the end of the day, it’s all makeshift. 

The more successful your transition and the less you look like the person in your documents, the more questions the authorities have for you. Changes in my appearance started occurring after two and a half years, and that’s when the problems started [with the mismatch between my appearance and my personal information]. There’s not much to do about it.

I knew I was transgender from the time I was a child, but as a teenager, I wanted to look like the most “normal” and “masculine” guy possible. Over the past 10 years, I started considering transitioning, but I didn’t do anything. I had this absurd idea that if I started to transition, I’d become a happier person, but at the cost of my social and professional life. For a long time, it seemed to me that I could never be a trans translator, journalist, news anchor, actor, or artist. The truth is that transition has its complications, of course. But I think I just needed time to accept [how significant transition is] for me.

I finally accepted my decision with the help of long-term therapy, already after moving [to Kyrgyzstan]. After the [Russian] government passed these homophobic and transphobic laws, I started to talk [on social media] about nontraditional gender identities. It seemed to me that if you stay silent, then you may as well not exist and you are playing into the hand of those who hate you. I think that, right now, it is crucially important to openly assert my identity, especially in the context of the growing right-wing sentiment in the world and Russia. But I cannot demand that of others.

Once they heard about the proposed laws, my [trans] friends in Russia decided that they needed to speed up their transitions. I have a friend, a trans man, who has gone through every necessary procedure in order to successfully change his documents. It’s possible that under different circumstances, a person might draw things out, but right now you have to do everything right away.

In a lot of ways, I’m in a unique position: my family and social circle are incredibly supportive. Unfortunately, that’s an exception. I’m also privileged to work as a producer and translator in European productions. Here, no one cares how I identify. Usually the job search for transgender people is full of uncertainty, so I hold on tightly to my work now.

Renat

21-year-old transgender man. Living in Russia, but planning to leave. Name changed at his request.

I was in no rush [to transition]. In the beginning, I thought of meeting with a psychotherapist in order to work through my emotions and save up for my medical fees and then hormone replacement therapy (HRT). I had been hoping to stay in the country until the very end, but since it started (Editor’s note: the law banning gender transition going into effect), now I'm in a rush to change my documents. I’ve already gone through the commission, and in a few days I’ll go for the certificate.

I hoped that first I’d undergo HRT and then change the gender marker on my documents. But then it turned out that I, [with a female appearance], didn’t match up with my passport [which has a male gender marker]. I am already preparing to deal with doctors [because of my new gender marker] and the “fun” that will start at the enlistment office.

You have to understand that it’s not clear how to live [in Russia] anymore. I’ve already managed to get together 9,000 rubles (about $95). It’s not enough for relocation, but my fiancé and I are going to get foreign passports [anyways]. I never thought that I would have to start crowdfunding, but here I am.

I haven’t turned to my relatives [as I have not talked to them about my identity]. The only ones who know are my future wife and my psychotherapist. I haven’t told them about the move either. I did tell some of my most trusted coworkers. My boss explained that I will either have to quit or start working remotely [she approved the second option]. Fortunately, I’m an artist, so it’s not a big deal to work remotely.

I understand that it’s going to be a while until we can actually move – a year for sure. At the present moment, we’ve settled down in a remote village with my parents so we can save more money. And we’ll need a lot of it because my [future] spouse has a disability and we need to have medication for the future. Aside from that, we have a bunch of pets that we need to chip, neuter, and vaccinate. All of that is already in the works. I made a list of things we need to do: get the transnational passports, close out our loans. I’m also trying to put together a decent portfolio — ideally I would find work as a specialist abroad.

We hope to apply [for asylum] when we are abroad. We are thinking about Spain — as far as we know, it is the easiest there. We’ll reach out to some organizations that help LGBTQ+ refugees, but that’s getting into the minutiae.

I can only imagine how much work volunteers have right now with how many people are suffering. There’s a feeling of flames all around me. You have no time to decide: change or move away. I barely sleep. It’s awful, what my life has become. I already had suicidal thoughts — but I have my family, so I will try to do whatever I can.

[gangstalkerbarbie]

People have got to learn the difference between levels of headcanon, I think, all over again. It will make fandom so much more fun for everybody.

You see the thing is that the Jewish acronym PaRDeS works for all kinds of interpretive textual analysis, let me take y'all on a journey.

P is for peshat, the straightforward literal meaning of a text. "There was a red balloon on the table". The balloon was red and it was placed on the table.

R is for remez, a hint, not a hint as in an asmachta (what you would call a hint as in hee hee, think about what we just learned) but a hint as in an allusion — if a text already said something once, it might employ shorthand to say that again. Were there red balloons before? Why?

D is for Drash, interpretation - the scriptural equivalent of widely held fanon, but also the use of cultural and contextual details not stated by the text to make inferences about the text. When there were 99 red balloons in hit song 99 Red Balloons, what did that mean at that time, and does that mean the same thing now, with the balloons on the table? Did your mother put it there to teach you war is bad, or did she mean to leave you a red balloon to play with?

S is for Sod, esoteric or divine insight, or in fandom terms, random shit external to the media like tweets by the creator and secret material found only in the media Discord. This part of the process entails going back through the text and combing it for any random evidence that might make your point: maybe your mother left the red balloon on the table to teach you that war is bad. (Did she? You can only know if you ask, and if there's no answer you probably can't argue factually about it with your siblings, but if that's what taught you that war is bad, yasher koach!) Maybe your mother believes war is bad because in her childhood she was a Young Pioneer, and that's why the balloon is red. Maybe the balloon is red for blood, and she grew up without a father because of a war.

Why do you think that? Why or why not? Should you nudge her old traumas and ask her, and if not, should you proceed as if this is the case?

Applying this to a common Homestuck headcanon, let's say "Dave Strider is Jewish".

P – does he ever say so? (No, thus making this not explicitly canon on the first level, but he makes some evocative references and has only one place where he could have internalised these concepts and traditions from).

R – is there any evidence? (Yes, if I recall correctly there is a menorah in his house in one panel of this comic, and he occasionally talks about some evocative things, and there are some scenes in the epilogues if you regard them as canon but I consider them apocrypha of a kind so linsey-woolsey.)

D — there is a tradition that he is Jewish. If I cared to continue this bit I would go look up who originated it and what her reasoning was. It would also narratively kinda fuck if he was Jewish. You could talk to people who believe this based on elements of this text. The elements are there.

S — why would Huss do that? Because Gnostic webcomic, insert Gnosticism rant here, you get the idea. Do you want this in your fanon? Why or why not?

Taken together: this is widely held fanon with plausible textual roots, and can be safely discussed as such. It is your choice whether you subscribe, but as it is an established tradition, you should probably live and let live regarding it.

Taking another example, completely hypothetical: Thomas the Tank Engine is a trans woman.

P — fuck no? Thomas the Tank Engine is a train.

R — but he is gendered, and gender is an axis of oppression in real life. It is repeatedly shown that Sodor is a profoundly oppressive society, so it's not that odd that someone could project additional non-train related oppression on the trains, if they're already fucking weird enough to think this deeply about Thomas the Tank Engine.

D — there is... sigh... you know what, I'm not looking to see if there is a tradition and what its basis is. I would rather make soup out of toilet tank water. It is bad to assume, but I'm going to pull an overconfident rabbi with no travel opportunities and say there is not a tradition that Thomas the Tank Engine is a trans woman. There is also no textual basis within the original picture book "Thomas the Tank Engine" for such a tradition.

S — on the other hand, the Thomas The Tank Engine / My Neck My Back mashup. While not grounded in tradition it is commonly seen and memed (equivalent to a religious thing being commonly believed, such as the entire metaphysical system of Hasidism, which everyone who's not a hasid is broadly of the opinion probably evolved partly from local spirituality by itself, in the absence of any connection to the rest of development of Jewish thought), and if I asked the creator I'm sure she would say it came to her in a vision.

In conclusion, there is absolutely no evidence for this, but you could believe it for the sake of your addiction to the bit if you wanted to, as long as you did not try to pretend that any evidence existed outside the realm of mystic revelation, and try to fight people who don't agree about it.

People are not being transphobic by pointing out that there is absolutely no evidence for the Thomas the Tank Engine trans headcanon that you are still allowed to cherish, it's just that you received it from the akashic plane of pure knowledge in a bolt of lightning and not a soul else on this planet ever has. It is pure personal headcanon and will not be elevated to the level of fanon unless enough people in the fandom begin to believe it, which they probably won't but you never know.

You should probably not expect people to have your reaction to it, because it is mystically inspired and people who do not live in your material conditions could not necessarily arrive at it. If you are on the other end and you meet someone with this kind of headcanon, though, don't provoke them about it, what's it to you? They live in a world where it's true, and you can't afford a ticket there.

kinda really sick n tired of people making any and everyone in fandoms trans or kinda trans. like what's wrong with being a gnc woman? why is a woman who doesn't shave suddenly trans/an egg? obviously I don't own the character and neither do they but it's disheartening to see every slight deviation of 'being stereotypically female TM' as being trans or whatever. transmasc this, transfem that - please.

[subiysu-chan]

Domestic Whipping Headcanons

Yes...You heard me correctly. Let's do it chronologically.

Anne-Marthe:

-They are for punishment only.

-They would be private, no audience.

-You are expected to docilely lie naked wherever she indicates.

-What she lacks in physical strength she'll make up in creativity. The whipping will most likely be preceded by the little wheel from Hell she uses. That's her favorite method.

-But once she decided on a whipping, you will receive either nettle lashing or if you've been exceptionally docile but clumsy, there is the off-chance she'll use peper mint perfume.

-THEN she'll proceed with a birching. It will require a lot of self-control from the punishee's part not to RUN across the room like a maniac from the sting.

-Luckily for the mansion and it's inhabitants, the one who got the treatment was Charles, who would just fall asleep after those corrections.

-Returned to old reliable little wheel from hell after he accidentally knocked a (thankfully unlit) chandelier.

-Doesn't bother with aftercare, or will let her eldest son do it.

Jean-Baptiste:

-Punitive use, however if Jeanne decides to be kinky he would probably but would rather not.

-Honestly, his mildness would depend on the punishee's compliance.

-You'll be forced to walk yourself to the torture chamber (or dissection room) and then you'll have your clothes removed.

-You'll probably just be tied there and left alone surrounded by torture instruments or corpses in more or less advanced stages of decomposition.

-Before leaving, expect a stern scolding.

-Rebel and he'll just brutally drag the punishee like a ragdoll by the ear, hair or arm.

-When he returns you'll already be quite shaken. Only then will the whipping start. He'll use a birch rod . Maybe if the punishee really relent and obey, he might use the martinet instead, but it's no guaranty. Will try to talk some sense into your through out. The amount of blows will be pre-determined in the beginning, however rebelling will only result in more punishment.

-After he might actually do medical after-care (cold water on bruises, give them fresh water and some salt on wounds), and be a bit gruff about it. It'll hurt. He'll explain why the punishment was "necessary".

-Depending on how extreme it was, will maybe hug the punishee at the end.

Subyss:

-Oh...The punishee is in trouble. First of all, it would be planned and he'll be harsh.

-Forget about clothes...For the entire day.

-Cane and nerve whip is bare minimum.

-Bleeding and certain.

-Medical after care consists of cauterization with hot iron.

-Honestly, it will probably handicap the punishee.

Charles:

-Punitive whippings only.

-Oh, he's the sneakiest.

-Punishment will be private.

-You would not know your in trouble until quite a while, and he won't start until the punishment begin.

-He'll politely ask you to put yourself in position. He'll only be forceful if you rebel, and he'll resort to rough handling only after he tried at least three times to convince them to get in position.

-Explanations and scolding will happen before or after he takes the clothes off depending on the punishee's age. For someone over let's say 10, he'll do the justification before stripping them.

-He will sweet-talk his way through, convincing that things won't be so bad.

-He'll hide the implement until the very end. The amount of blows will depend on the age, health and gender of the punishee, of between 10-20.

-The sensations will be quite surprising and much more painful than expected.

-Will use hair as a grabbing point to avoid putting the head in a position where they'd be too much blood rushing to the head.

-Aftercare would be more gruff. At that point, sweet-talking is long gone. He'll just tend to the wounds, drag them to bed and leave the punishee.

Marie-Josephe:

-Not interested in punitive whippings at home, but at work. For the home, she might be interested in BDSM.

-She will probably use something like a rod or a similarly sexualized implement.

-Marie is pretty unpredictable so I have nothing else to add.

[twisted-wonderland-but-gayer]

Unit Y-0U

Prologue: Fragmented Memories

Notes: Yuu is Gender-Neutral. No set description of Yuu at all, aside from some mentions of scars and them being on the taller side. (explained in the prologue). The characters in this are a bit older as I made night raven an actual college. This is based off of the Great 7 Parent Au on this blog ans stuff.

This Prologue is entirely optional and just provides some basic worldbuilding for the world Yuu is from. Important stuff will be repeated in later chapters. I based this world on the Mirrorverse game. Also, I fixed Pocahontas because I am native and still enraged. She is a kid too, and not colonized. The Horned King is a forgotten Disney villain which surprises me since he's worse than Chernabog.

This kinda sucks ngl…. It's a series of, well… fractured and corrupt memories that aren't entirely accurate or in their entirety. I hope it gets better from here, but I doubt it. Yuu will actually start to remember things correctly/remember their actual feelings as time goes on. Yuu is generally a pretty kind but traumatized trope that will also tend to push the OBs around more to help them develop. Idk lmao.

Locating Unit Coordinates...

[An error has occurred. Review crash log?]

Rebooting…

Unit coordinates can no longer be tracked. Unit has disappeared.

****

Unit has sustained large amounts of damage. Reviewing backup cache… Fragments of information have been restored. Note: What is seen here may have been altered by unit mental state or devices that can change or alter memory. The following memories are out of order. Proceed with caution.

****

Magic was once the lifeblood of your world. It pumped life into every corner of the universe, bringing balance to all inside. At least, that is what the elders said. Ever since the disappearance of magic, nothing has been the same. As magic began to die, so did the world, causing cataclysmic events.

The fae was the most affected, and their home became a barren wasteland, and with each new generation of fae having weaker magic and mages becoming rarer, there was no guarantee their species would survive. Without magic to balance the world, it came down to the people. Many argued about who should be in charge and how the world should be poised; some sought to control the world through structure and rules. Others turned to violence and discord.

You were born during this apocalypse, or rapture, as many called it. Though, you never really understood most of it as a kid. Your village and your parents taught you more about how to survive. How to hide. How to hunt. How to barter. How to be crafty and frugal. How to run. How to have no waste. How to sneak around. How to read safety diamonds and warning labels. That was your life. Then an invasion came.

****

Mercenaries of the higher powers came in their high-tech armor, and fancier phones, and scary beasts they rode upon because they could afford to feed them. 

“The detectors say there is either a mage or catalyst among you filth.” Catalyst? You and the other village kids hid behind the adults, confused by the big words they spoke. “We do need some magic batteries for the city, so give up whoever it is! Cough them out, and I may just let you live.” The man spat, cruel eyes glaring down at everyone atop his high-griffin that swiveled its head around vigilantly.

Behind your parents' back, you recognized a signal. One said, ‘take the other children and hide. You’re the oldest. We believe in you.’ You used the adults as a shield as you grabbed other children by the hand and led them to the safe zone—a hollowed-out tree with rocks and mud covering the opening. 

Digging through the rocks and mud, you removed the barrier to safety and slid inside to prepare the inside for the others, making sure it was safe. All those years of skipping meals to keep the younger ones fed made you thin enough to slide in. Through one of the cracks in the trunk, you saw the griffin push over an adult and screech at the group of children. 

The last thing you remember is watching the man grab the sword around his waist and his men grabbing blasters. You remember desperately digging your fingers into the mud and rocks and digging till they bled to make the opening wider. While digging, you heard screaming, running, gunfire, violence, and crying.

You were in that trunk for what felt like hours, and not a single other kid made it in. “Men! Find that mage and spare no mercy!” echoed through your head over and over. Your body shivered from both fear and the cold.

****

Happy memories surge forth to try and protect your fragile mind. 

“We never cut our hair in our culture. It contains your knowledge and wisdom. That's what my mama told me, at least.” The girl in front of you leans her head back and smiles as you braid her hair. “Really?”

“Mmm-hmm. You could only cut on a new moon when you need to make a change or when you lose a loved one,” Pocohontas leaned back up and stretched her spine. “Sometimes, when the women in my tribe get really stressed, they would braid their hair super tightly and go outside on a windy day. They then undo their hair and let the wind carry away all of their worries!” 

You adored listening to your friend and learning about her culture. She was like a little sister to you. Both of you had to grow up too fast. Her face fell as the conversation dwindled. “I miss my tribe….”

****

The sounds of bloodshed continued and continued for what felt like days. Still, no one else came into the shelter. Did you fail…? The only thing keeping you awake was adrenaline and the cold as you shivered in fear. Left in pitch black darkness, hoping to survive—

****

“Some pancakes for you, Mulan.” “Thank you, Kronk.” “And for you too, Merida.” The redhead didn't wait to dig in, thanking the cook through a mouthful of food. “You too, Rapunzel.” “Ooo! Thank you.” “And finally, here's some for you, kiddo; Go on, take a bite. We did make them together, after all.”

You beamed as you bit into a pancake you and Kronk made together. The man has been your teacher in the kitchen and even taught you how to be a proper scout. He even taught you how to understand the woodland creatures within the forest. You adored the tan man and hoped to get as big and strong as him someday. You hope he's safe…

The other girls were also important to you. Mulan was a master at the sword. She carried six on her person, along with a shield that hung off her armored body. She was so kind and taught you some basic blade and footwork. She often went out on missions to help gather materials for the village. If only she was here right now…

The blonde with the long hair was also the village healer. Her hair and singing healed any wound there was. You often ended up in her care, but it wasn’t bad at all. Together, with her chameleon, Pascal, you both painted together. You would make up silly stories with her and sing silly songs. Maybe she can heal the others.

Merida, the redhead with an accent. She taught you everything stealth. Everything hunting. Under her training, you learned to hit bullseyes easily. You often went out with her to practice your hunting skills, and she’d always congratulate you no matter how small your catch was. She should be back from her hunting trip soon you hope…

****

Peaking out of the tree, you saw tents and buildings in ruins. The few vehicles and other technology your village had were either scalped or broken beyond repair. You squeeze out of your hole, head on a  swivel to check for any danger as you try to find an adult.

Sneaking slowly you trudge forth into the broken village. Beneath your feet, you step into something warm and sticky. Looking down you recognize the bodies that hugged each other in death as your parents— you can barely remember their faces any more or the name they gave you— and you fell to your knees, letting out a wail. You didn't care who heard, unaware you were being watched.

****

“A catalyst with such potential… how rare…” 

A skeletal figure watched from afar, whispering to himself. Running into a potent catalyst was lucky enough, but now he doesn’t even have to put effort into kidnapping or indoctrinating them. He can step in and ‘save’ that child.

The hooded figure approached the kid, standing behind them as they mourned. “You poor thing, all alone with no one left…” His bony hand rested on their back as his honeyed words soothed them. “There, there. I will take you in, I promise.”

****

You held the rotting, bony hand of the man who saved you. The Horned King. You allowed him to guide you through the castle he constructed with his own magic. He spoke of many deranged things in a manic tone. Politics. Power. Desires. Ideals.

Then he stopped in front of the balcony, admiring the red sunset in a grey, smog-filled sky. “The world we are in is dying. But… It can be saved.” Your eyes went wide. “It can?”

The king nodded. “I have been using what magic I have to give my men power to rebuild The Black Cauldron, a magical item that will save us. I have sent my men across dimensions and planets in mechanical space boats to seek a catalyst powerful enough to bring the cauldron. With it, I can rule over the land and bring back the magic this world has forgotten.”

“Catalyst?” You remembered the men at your village, what did that word mean? The horned king’s sunken eyes looked down at you. “A catalyst, unlike a mage, is something that can absorb magic, and redirect it. Like a magestone.” The king paced in front of you. “Catalysts, not to mention powerful ones, are rare. They can handle storing high amounts of magic to be used at a later time.”

The king turned to you. “This is where you come in, little one. I have found seven magic fragments that I cannot use. You, however, just might…” The hooded figure of rotting flesh knelt in front of you. “With your power, we can bring back magic and save the world. What do you say, little one?”

****

Spread on a vivisection table you lay, barely covered up by a hospital gown of sorts. Your chest and stomach hurt, your body was weak, and you can feel the thin, paper gown brush against the sensitive scar tissue on your body hurts. It hurts so bad. You feel your heartbeat in your ears being accompanied by a faint ringing and pulsing. What did they do to you?

A muffled groan echoes in your head, followed by the sounds of cracking and popping. ‘Oh it feels good to be back…’ a gravely voice echoes in the back of your head, reverberating in your thoughts. You can hear additional whispers and laughter in the back of your mind. Please shut up. Please. You can’t take any more noises or voices in your head. You just want some time to yourself. ‘Woah easy there kid, no need to worry…’ The voice purrs, ‘Just give me control, and you’ll be fine…’

You didn’t even know what that meant until you felt your body go slack, twitching by itself as if there was a puppeteer over you. You panicked, trying your best to fight back against the feeling of your eyes drying out from glowing or the weird blue flicker of your hair. You couldn't do much, strapped down to the vivisection table, but damn it if you didn’t try.

Odd power surged through you as you felt your body flicker before going back to normal. ‘What the hell?! Why can’t I take control?! What's goin on? Actually better yet, why am I in you, kid?’ You were too tired to answer, and the energy that flowed through your body early drained you of what little energy you had left, making you pass out. The entire time you swear you can hear a conversation within you. Your body hurts, but you remember what your savior said. “I am sorry for the pain you must endure, but know that it is necessary, and that you are strong enough,”

****

Log 3: Side-Effects

Unit Y-0U has been successfully fused with the 7 mage fragments uncovered from [REDACTED]. The child is now in recovery mode from what appeared to be an extremely painful surgery, I sadly wasn’t present at the time, however, I heard it was done without painkillers. Master said that it was to make sure the weapon becomes resilient by increasing tolerance to pain. Surgery to eliminate pain receptors: Pending.

The Cauldron Mage Unit has remarked about hearing more voices in their head than usual. These voices are apparently very rude and confused. The (Child) Unit seems disturbed. When put on anti-psychotics the new voices did not go away. This must be a simple side-effect of the casting process. I will continue to keep an eye on them

-Yzma Researcher #121000

Log: End

Personal Diary: New Entry

This child has lost all light in their eyes. As time goes on they have become more ill-mannered and rude. I do not blame them. No child deserves any of this torture. I just wonder what The Horned King is thinking, making this kid into some strange ‘cauldron born’ soldier to bring back all of magic. Fucking hell. I regret what I did. I regret working with them. Am I truly doing the right thing? Torturing a child? Ripping the wings off fae and draining them of what little magic they have left? Will this really bring back magic to our world after it disappeared? I have a lot to think about. I’m going to be sick.

If this continues I doubt this weapon would even work with us. I am going to try and sneak it some bread tomorrow, Cedric’s approval be damned. I can disguise it as maintaining the weapon and its cast. I can’t imagine what it is like to wake up in a new body. Poor kid, it doesn’t even have a proper name. 

#121000

****

The next few days were odd. You started to hear more voices… But this… This will go away. It will be worth it if you can help your savior save the world! Right…?

****

‘I see… So… I am now stuck inside you, a kid no less…’ You can see a ghost of a hand drag across the specter's face in your mind. ‘Great… Wonderful. How am I supposed to take over Olympus like this?! Did I die? Is this the afterlife for gods?’ The voice snarled in your head, making you flinch, you can feel his rage wash over you, heating the inside of your body.

‘Silence. You are giving me a migraine. I cannot believe that someone like me is trapped inside this… unsightly vessel. I swear no vessel of mine will be looking like a slob.‘ A cruel voice cuts in. Her words harsh, but true. 

‘And now I have roommates. Also, what do you mean by your vessel? I woke up first! This thing is mine, get your own!’ ‘Yeah, you tell them boss!’ you hear a few voices mutter. Your chest felt cold as the cruel voice from before became silent. Her rage, icy and cold. ‘Enough, I am not talking to an ill-mannered slob such as yourself. Unlike you, I am actually trying to find a solution.‘

An argument was brewing in your mind, and you can tell a headache was coming on.

****

‘Revived? Inside a child? Tch, it's better than that lamp I suppose.’ the voice sneered.

‘Ah Jafar, what an unpleasant surprise, you’re here as well. Hmph. So you were revived as well. What a shame…’ another voice who called herself Maleficent hissed.

‘Please don’t fight you two. I don't know what happened. I was just told I was going to be fused and woke up like this.’ It was quiet for a minute before a sigh echoed through your head. A new voice came. This one is older, but smooth and soothing despite the words she spits, but before you can hear anything you let drowsiness overtake you as the conversation gets quieter.

****

Your training got harder by the day. Magic theory. Potion craft. Alchemy. Tactics. Sword Fighting. Hand-to-Hand. Dodging. Weight Training. carrying weights for days on end without sleep. Pushing, pushing, pushing.

You were a weapon, a beacon of hope, and you must be strong. You were subjected to experiment after experiment. Regimen after regimen. “Allow them no breaks! We have no time to waste!” The Horned King speaks.

It was the last thing you remember before being attached to a machine. A machine that plugged into the flesh of your neck and kept you active. It would both rest and still train you. Not even in dreams do you escape your work. Your stomach hurts. They forgot to feed you again. Your head hurts from the strange voices in your head that have yet to clear up. Every word they speak is strangled and garbled on some days, yet completely clear the next. As you drift off, you hear a conversation

‘The gall of those mages to hit my vessel. Next time, you are to strike back- no wait. We are going to concoct a poison so potent, that two sorry excuses of mages won't see it coming. they do not know the first thing when it comes to magic anyways!’

‘They speak as if magic is foreign to them and teach poor, pathetic, elementary spells.‘ The new woman's voice muttered. ‘I think if we all long for freedom, we should teach this child how to use our magic, for a price of course…’

****

Personal Log:

I saw the child destroy the only object it had in its room the other day— a mirror. It couldn’t stand looking at itself in its new body. I don't blame it, this new one isn’t designed with any warmth in mind. Just a simple cast to help one achieve being the perfect weapon. I have heard the child scream to shut up multiple times while grasping its head in pain. The voices haven't stopped.

At least it is showing promise of power, recently it has been wielding high-power magic and is now taking on even higher-level training exercises. The weight it can now lift is incredible! Truly a worthy vessel under our king who will turn things back to the way they were before! 

I heard they are sending the child out to the wastelands to retrieve more relics. That's good and all but how are we sure they won’t run away? Their handlers refuse to treat them with an ounce of respect, and we barely feed it for the sake of ‘strengthening it just in case the weapon goes too long without food. This feels strange. How long before it gets wiser?

I guess it doesn't matter since I can simply implant better memories in them or remove those fragments temporarily and render them unable to use magic. I'm sure the King wouldn't mind me doing a biiiit of brainwashing.

Anyways, new ships capable of gliding across water and into space have been constructed. Our empire will now grow even stronger. The child will now be sent on missions across dimensions and into space. Now they can truly train for phase 2 of the king's plan. To rule the world with our Cauldron Born army. And with such a happy and kind child showing off their magic and helping villages, no one would dare to oppose us, but rather, welcome us with open arms.

- Cedrick

****

‘You must rest now, otherwise evil and vengeance will never prosper’ The dragon fae soothes you with her words as you rest in a medical tent, the last mission exposed you to some poisonous spores, giving you a fever. A warm washcloth rests on your forehead and you can feel the ghost of her fingers brush against your cheek. ‘I'm not used to just sitting around so idly…’ ‘You should really learn how, it would benefit you’ Scar interjects. You can see the specter of him stretching before lounging on top of you. Oddly enough, you could feel the weight of him on you, along with the strange heat that comes off of him. You can even hear the three hyenas rummaging around beside you.

It's so strange feeling so loved… You remember just a year ago how hostile they were to you. This insolent subject! How dare you refuse a command from me?! You remember the Red Queen yelled at you. You are to obey or it is off with your head! Now you are her ‘Little Crown’ or heir as she sometimes calls you. It’s crazy just how fast things change

****

You came to realize that with the seven in your head, you were being used. No hero would abuse their subjects like the Horned king did. He lacked transparency. He let those scientists hurt you. ‘We should burn him’ Hades replies in your head.

‘Absolutely not. That King’s followers are quite devoted. Furthermore, we are not in a position to fight back.’ Jafar notes. Scar grumbles in agreement, ‘No place to escape to, surrounded by insanely devoted minions… The effort it would take to win…’ ‘Would not be ideal…’ Ursula purrs. ‘Even with our magic combined, the poor guppy here isn’t in the ideal condition to fight.’

You roll in your bedroll within your ‘room’. An observation room in the lab with a one-way mirror taking over an entire wall. Windowless, no decoration or light. The silence and plainness of it all is maddening,

‘Isn’t strange to not take care of your weapons?’ Grimhilde notes. ‘Surely, if your plan relies on one person, you would take care of them…” Her voice became sour at the end, disgusted at the treatment you have endured. 

‘Which means, he may know about our loyalty wavering, or he knows that we may rebel…’ Maleficent notes. ‘Well, maybe he wouldn't have to worry about that if he were to have actually treated our precious crown right’! The Queen of Hearts sasses, you can hear the low clicking of the eel twins and the Jabberwock agreeing with the queen.

‘Stay on your toes, young one. Be careful. And look for an opening to escape.’  Jafar whispers to you, and you feel the ghost of his hand cup your cheek.

****

“The village people have constructed a statue of us in the town square.” The king hums. “Really?! I mean— I’ve hardly done anything…” The king looks down at you, rotting, sunken eyes analyzing you. “You have grown so much stronger than when we first met, I knew it was a good idea to take you in on that day.” 

‘Tch. What a pathetic attempt at lying. Also do not doubt yourself so much, little dragon.’ Maleficent responds. ‘All those years of dealing with this asshole probably did something to their self-worth, if only someone suggested we kill him sooner!’ You close your eyes in agreement with them. Lies. He never cared. You were just another test run that ended up making it the farthest.

‘Language, Hades. That foolish plan wouldn’t have done well, as for you Vessel. Do not talk down to yourself. I am not letting someone that represents me do such a thing!’ You smile a bit at her words, able to read between the lines to understand that what she really means to say is ‘I care about you so much’. Hades huffs. ‘Whatever Hidey… Now let's focus on what this Underworld escapee has to say.’

Oh right, there's a statue of you in your honor and a few propagandic stories of your tales to make you feel like you’re doing the right thing.  All this work just to make sure you don’t fight back. As much as The Horned King hated to admit it, you were stronger than him, and that's terrifying. No one has ever survived this long as a Cauldron Born Unit. At least, when he is done using you, you will be sacrificed to the cauldron, making him the most powerful one of all, and he would no longer have to worry about pleasing you. 

Or so he hopes. You see through him. But you will continue to play dumb and take the abuse. But… a very small part of you believes it all. You deserve to be hit. You are doing the right thing. Maybe He was right. Maybe, you truly are worthless...

****

In your room that night, you curled up in your bedroll, hiding the data crystal you swiped from the lab earlier. You were gonna get down to the bottom of whatever the hell these people were doing.

Tapping it, a small screen popped up from it. The beginning of the report was titled “Magic Extractor”. By the description, this was related to fueling both the cauldron and The Horned King himself…

Opening it you began to read, and with each line, you began to feel sick. Your stomach sunk and your heartstrings felt like they were played by a knife as you continued. You knew that the people you served were bad… You never knew it was like this.

All those fae, all those mages, those children…

Something snapped in you that day, and the seven found themselves supporting you. You are done. You are escaping. You will bring hell to all of those to hurt you.

****

“My King! Unit Y-0U has run off and escaped.”

“What?!” The Horned King yelled. “Where are they?!"

“They ran out of the lab without permission and were last seen going to the Magic Extractor.”

The Horned King fumed and immediately teleported off to you. Maybe this was a rebellious phase he needed to hammer out. You were still a kid after all. Maybe he can convince you that what you would see is what had to be done. Maybe he could just simply erase every memory you have.

As he teleported and appeared at the sight, he looked upon the ruins of what remained of the extractor. It was destroyed. Mages, mers, beasts, and fae all escaping out of the prison he built. Many were fighting the workers. The king felt rage bubble in his bones as he searched around for— you. A child amidst it all. 

In the middle of it all, fighting with those who want to fight, instructing the others on where to go. Summoning waves to carry the mer away. “YOU! CHILD. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!” The king roared, catching your attention.

You gripped your polearm in your hand and turned towards him. “The future you want is one I despise. I never wanted any of this!”

“Do you really think you can defeat me?! I created you!”

“And I am stronger than you.” Fae and beast stood aside as you raised your polearm. From this day on, you bow to no king. From this day on, you declare war on your creator….

….

...

You swear you hear Hades, Pain, and Panic all yell “Viva la revolution” while cheering you on…

[mediocremelatonin235]

Fic Dump: The Alchemy Incident

"The Alchemy teacher has a new victim and it's not even a student this time"

Part (1/?)

(A/N This is fic I wrote at 1AM when bored and midway Sam's gender changes so throughout the second half Sam is referenced by the use of She/her pronouns, also sorry about any errors since this is my first time wiritng fic)

Contains: Genderbend, swearing [?], potential OOC(Sam doesn't have much voice lines so I have to get creative)

Divus was getting his class set up for an alchemy lessons with the second years this afternoon. This day was going decently so far considering the second years are in his words “ the middle ground” when it comes to chaos, mainly due to general rule that every day in night raven is pure chaos.

The cards seem to be in his favor as of today due to the fact that once his instruction is over, he is able to go to the mystery shop to blow off some steam with Sam at the mystery shop in exchange for drinks as well as place for him to finish his prep work such as grading papers, curating lesson plans, ignoring Crowley etc. ( and truth be told he needed someone to talk to that wasn't a stuffed shirt or a meathead sometimes)

This lesson in particular was about the gender-flipping potion, the special potion that has the ability to flip anyone’s gender at will through the means of consumption. The lesson was going decently with the exception of Sliver dozing off and dropping the beakers (despite his many warnings that they are extremely expensive) and Floyd trying to anger Rosehearts into burning down the whole lab ( at the end they were separated).

Truth be told, the only groups that conducted the experiment correctly were Ruggie and Kalim as well as Azul and Jamil. After the class was complete he passed out instructions for the homework, observed the results of the students, reset the supplies for tomorrow, got the drinks he promised Sam and headed towards the Mystery shop.

The mystery shop was a unique place which is a one-stop general store around campus. This is the sort of place where you can get your groceries as well as a diamond necklace and precious gems and expensive potions. The ambiance also takes you straight to the Jazz scene of New Orleans and its a nice tune to Divus’s ears, but never mind that now. He was never here to buy anything, just to blow off some steam with a co-worker before the next batch of kids.

“Greetings, How’re you today? Welcome to the Mystery Stop” He announced, his voice echoing through the shop.

“Sorry, not today but I promised I would make it up to you?” showing Sam the drinks he brought with him in one arm while the other was holding his paperwork.

“Alright deal” he stated, clearly satisfied with the exchange.

They discuss at length about many things such as their boss, their students, what they considered to be hot button topics such as business and fashion, as well as sometimes things about their lives such as their workaholic natures that keep them running their jobs and lives. Not to mention gossip about anything and everything.

“Do I look like a womanizer” he groans to Sam, tired of the students and their shenanigans.

“Well judging by the way you dress you do give off that impression” Sam states, very amused by his plight, clearing and stocking shelves.

“Look, I really don't care what people say about me in public, but teenagers are so shameless about it where is their respect for their elders” he huffed, taking a swing of his drink.

“Look who's talking” Sam retorts, aware of his previous reputation for being the biggest troublemaker in NRC prior to being a teacher,

“Times were different” He quips, trying to defend himself in the argument.

“Whatever you say” Sam chuckles, taking a bit of the drink into his mouth.

The rest of the time went on with Divus occasionally helping out Sam in the shop and vice versa with prep work and lesson plans, then the bell rings and Divus proceeds with his next class, hoping this one won't blow up on his face.

[bonkie-barnes]

Surgery Shenanigans

wanda maximoff x gn!reader

word count: 1.3k

warnings: broken bone, surgery

- - -

It was supposed to be a simple mission. Get in, get out. Unfortunately, expectations are rarely reality.

You were almost to the exit when your path became blocked by an Hydra agent twice your size. Usually, you would be able to take him down, but the exhaustion of the day was catching up to you.

You are locked in hand to hand combat with the agent for a few minutes, neither of you making progress, when you hear a sickening crunch. It takes a second before your brain catches up with what happens. That’s when the pain hits you.

You’ve broken your arm, and it’s bad.

Before the agent can inflict any more harm against you, he is thrown into the opposite wall by a red force. You turn your head to make out Wanda through your tears. She rushes over to you, letting out a soft gasp at the sight of your arm.

“Wanda, it hurts,” you cry out.

“I know my love. It’ll be okay,” she replies softly.

Slowly, the two of you make your way out of the base towards the awaiting Quinjet. The second after Wanda sits you down on a seat, she instructs Steve to call ahead to the compound to let them know of your situation.

She sits down next to you before taking you in her arms, careful not to jostle your arm. You slowly fall asleep to the whispers of comfort from Wanda and the pleasant thoughts she is projecting your way.

- - -

You wake again when the Quinjet has landed. There is a nurse and a wheelchair waiting for you at the bottom of the ramp.

“Are you okay to stand, darling?” Wanda asks you softly.

You nod and grit your teeth. The pain has come in full force now.

Slowly, you make your way off the jet and practically drop yourself into the wheelchair. The journey from the landing pad to the medical wing of the compound barely registers in your head, the pain from your arm too strong. You’re only snapped out of the pain-induced haze with the words “You’ll need surgery” coming from the doctor.

“Wait what,” you exclaim, your anxiety picking up immediately.

“We have to do surgery to place the bones back correctly, Agent,” the doctor supplies calmly.

“I’ll be here as soon as you wake up, love,” Wanda tells you softly.

You look into her eyes for a long minute trying to calm your racing heart. You nod once and with that you’re being wheeled into a surgery room.

- - -

The lights have been dimmed in your post-op room. You are covered from shoulder to toe in warm blankets. There is a scratchy cast on your left arm. You grunt softly, letting the inhabitants of the room know you are awake.

“Hi, my love. How are you feeling?” Wanda asks you softly.

You grunt again before slowly opening your eyes ever so slightly. You’re exhausted and your eyes fall closed almost immediately.

“Would you like some water?” your nurse asks.

You nod slowly. A cup with a bendy straw is brought to your lips and you clumsily take a sip, the water running down your chin slightly. Wanda chuckles and moves to wipe the water away with a napkin.

Slowly, you open your eyes again. At that moment, your doctor passed by your room.

A gasp leaves your lips as you yell, “Hey! I know you!”

The doctor laughs as she looks over your chart on a clipboard. “How are you feeling Y/N?”

“‘M fine,” you slur.

“That’s good to hear. I have to go check on something, but I’ll be back in a minute,” she replies.

You simply nod and demand more water.

The anesthesia has you feeling chatty. Suddenly, you ask the nurse her name.

“It’s Jackie, sweetheart.”

“Nice to meet you, Jackie. Do you like your job?” You ask.

She lets out a laugh. “I love my job.”

“How long have you worked at it?”

“About 15 years now.”

“Woah…,” you mutter.

Wanda moves to give you some more water.

“Hey, you’re really pretty Wanda.”

“Thank you my love,” she giggles.

“What’s your name?” you suddenly ask your nurse again.

“It’s Jackie, sweetheart,” She says after a laugh.

“Oh cool. Do you like your job?”

Everyone in the room chuckles before Jackie replies with the same response as earlier.

At that moment, your doctor had walked back into the room.

“Hey, I know you!” you exclaim excitedly.

“Yes you do! How are we feeling now?” She replies.

“It hurts,” you mutter with a frown.

“Alright, we’ll give you some medicine to make it feel better,” Jackie tells you.

You simply nod before asking Jackie her name for the third time. At her response you get a contemplative look on your tired face.

“Hey Jackie? What’s your favorite Disney movie?”

“Oh, I don’t know. I’d have to say Beauty and the Beast. It was the last one I watched with my grandchildren.”

Without giving her a chance to ask you about your favorite, you blurt out, “Mine is Tangled. I like the music. How many grandchildren do you have?”

Jackie smiles. “I have three children and six grandchildren.”

“That’s so cool,” you mutter, opening your eyes. You hadn’t realized they had been closed for most of the exchange.

Slowly, your surroundings were becoming more clear to you. The anesthesia was wearing off slowly but surely. Wanda continued to give you water periodically. It dribbles down your chin every time.

You’re contentedly sipping your water when Jackie speaks up next.

“Would you like some stickers? I always have some with me for my grandchildren.”

“Oh my god, yes please,” you practically yell. Wanda laughs and shushes you.

Jackie comes back a few minutes later. “Guess what I found?”

She holds up some stickers for you to see.

“Oh my god, Tangled stickers!” you exclaim. “I’m so happy right now."

The doctor then comes in to tell Wanda that she can take you back to your room now.

“Hey baby. You want to go sleep in your own bed now?” she asks you quietly.

You simply nod. Now that the anesthesia has mostly worn off, you’re feeling very tired.

Wanda helps you sit up as Jackie wheels a wheelchair over to the side of your bed. You slowly stand up and wobble over to the chair. Wanda maintains a strong hold on your uninjured arm while rubbing your back as you waver on your feet.

Once you get situated in the chair, you fully register the heaviness of your eyelids. The trip to yours and Wanda’s room ends quickly in your tired state.

Wanda helps you into the bed before turning away to get you a glass of water. When she returns, you make grabby hands for her.

“‘M cold,” you mumble.

Wanda laughs as she crawls into bed with you. “Alright love. I’m here.”

You hum in content as you wrap your body around hers, being mindful of your cast.

“Go to sleep, love. I’ll be here when you wake up,” Wanda tells you softly.

You fall asleep to the sound of her heartbeat in her chest and the feeling of her hand in your hair.

- - -

“I said what?!”

Wanda just laughs as she continues telling you what you said while under the influence of the anesthesia.

“Oh my god, that’s so embarrassing,” you groan, as you pinch the bridge of your nose with your fingers. “The first thing I remember is saying it hurt and the nurse giving me medicine.”

“That’s the first thing you remember?”

“Don’t tell me there’s more,” you grumble. You go to hide your face in your hands when Wanda grabs your uninjured hand in hers.

“Don’t hide, my love. It was cute!” She brings your hand up to her lips, kissing the knuckles softly. “You’re very cute when you’re loopy.”

“I never want to be drugged up again.”

Wanda simply laughs and proceeds to pepper your face in kisses.

If this is what you get for breaking your arm, maybe needing surgery wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

- - -

A/N: hello! i hope you enjoyed! i had surgery last week (not for a broken bone, however) and this is pretty much exactly what i did after i woke up. i thought it would make a funny story. i try to keep it gender neutral, but if i've messed up somewhere, please let me know! feedback is greatly appreciated!

[bukojuiice]

— what they would be like as disney princes

ೃ pairings: (izuku midoriya, katsuki bakugo, shoto todoroki, and eijiro kirishima x fem! reader)

ೃ  tags: headcanons, disney au!

ೃ warnings:  none

ೃ  my nav  →  my mha writing masterlist  → my katsuki bakugo x reader smau

ೃ if you want to be a part of my mha taglist. send me an ask!  ♡

ೃ s/o to bestie @lovelytarou​ for her big brain and for helping me think up which of the princes kiri could be 😚💕

ೃ  please do reblog if you enjoyed!! it really helps writers and content creators on tumblr! (feel free to add tags too because i love reading them and my heart swells with happiness when people love my work!)

ೃ extra note: adding my own little twist to these hcs, they are disney princes with quirks!

ೃ taglist: @chibishae34​ @sparkykatsuki​ @ramunegoddess, @serossimpy

Eijiro Kirishima –  as Li Shang from Mulan

-        *Mulan voice* Eijiro? Eijiro? Eijiroooo

-        Eijiro Kirishima is the handsome son of the Army General and it’s very obvious that everyone swoons for him. Yes, everyone in the army.

-        He’s manly, brave, sweet, caring, and responsible. What more can a soldier ask for?

-        “LET’S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS! TO DEFEAT THE VILLAINS!” (ok that sounded better in my head)

-        during the “I make a man out of you” sequence, kirishima uses his hardening quirk to not only hype up his warriors but also for that extra effect. He’s just bad-ass and hot like that.

-        Eijiro wakes up at 5 am to train and work out. And yes, he does that shirtless. It helps him move a lot more and of course, it’s pleasing to the eyes.

-        H I S T O N E D M U S C L E S. that’s it. That’s the headcanon.

-        He needs that daily grind after all !

-        You swear you could hear the other soldiers sigh dreamily every time they catch him work out.

-        Whenever he praises his fellow comrades, he smiles a very cheeky smile, his shark teeth cutely popping out and it’s just so endearing and charming.

-        After being ridiculed and belittled by your fellow comrades for being physically weak, you wanted to prove them that they were wrong. You continue to stay determined as you decided to create your training regime that consisted of waking up at 5 am in the morning to train too (and this was prior to knowing that kirishima would wake up at the same time to work out too. Oooh~ what a coincidence.)

-        “(Y/N)! You like him? Helloooooo!? Him and I even share the same hair color! He ain’t worth it!”

-        “Mushu, please. You are a discount version of him. Now, I’m going to go and train now.”

-        You leave your tent at exactly 5 am, and as you began to stretch and do warm-ups outside, the biggest tent across yours suddenly opens up too, revealing General Eijiro Kirishima… in his shirtless getup.

-        “A-ah! Good Morning General Kirishima!” You stand up straight, shifting your weight to the right leg and bending your left, bowing to him.

-        He nods at you, shooting you a small smile. “You’re up early. Early for a new recruit! Do you plan to train?”

-        “Y-yes! I will be using the pole and training weights sir!” You bow your head, as you remain standing straight.

-        He hands you over the weights. He refuses to give it to you, instead insists to tie it on your wrists and help you up the wooden pole.

-        General Kirishima holds you by the waist, making sure you don’t fall and you’re positioned correctly onto the pole. “Alright. You’re positioned in the right way now, you may proceed.”

-        You continue to hold onto it, lowkey about to bang your head on the wooden pole as you were about to die of embarrassment.

-        “(Y/N), he’s just being nice and just treats you like any other soldier under his command. Don’t expect too much!” Mushu whispers from your side, as soon as general kiri steps back and was not within earshot of the two of you.

-        “I don’t have my hopes up at all, Mushu. I’m not expecting anything.” You sigh, trying to reassure yourself as you began climbing up. The weights pull you down, but you must persevere.

-        “You can do this, (L/N)!”

-        “(L/N)!?” You squeak, losing your focus, slipping down the pole and back to square one. You were a fumbling mESS

-        “woah woah woah. Is everything alright?” he was about to hold onto your waist again, making sure you don’t fall off or fall down. You collect yourself before becoming too flustered to answer.

-        “Y-yes General Kirishima! I’m fine!”

-        When your gender had finally been revealed after the battle against the villains, Kirishima did not feel betrayed albeit just disappointed that you had to hide that fact for far too long and wasn’t being open to him when the two of you became much closer

-        He’s been in love with you ever since the beginning.

-        He’s always admired your passion and your drive. However, due to him being the general, he wasn’t so sure to approach you without being biased. 

-        “You don’t find a girl like that in every hero’s journey.”

Katsuki Bakugo – as The Beast

-        Once upon a time, in a faraway land, a blonde young prince lived in a     shining castle.  Although he had everything his heart desired and his quirk was one of the most powerful many have seen, the prince was belligerent, selfish, and unkind.  But then, one winter's night, an old beggar woman came to the castle and offered him a single rose in return for shelter from the bitter cold. 

-       Repulsed by her haggard appearance, the prince sneered at the gift and turned the old woman away, but she warned him not to be deceived by appearances, for beauty is found within. And when he dismissed her again, the old woman's ugliness melted away to reveal a beautiful enchantress.  The prince tried to apologize, but it was too late, for she had seen that there was no love and no humbleness in his heart, and as punishment, she transformed him into a hideous beast, and placed a powerful spell on the castle, and all who lived there.    

-        We’ve been known, the B in bakugo stands for beast (insert lenny face for a certain implication)

-        Essentially, Bakugo had two quirks at once. Not only was he now a beast, (a physical quirk) but he also has his explosion quirk.

-        He’d pretty much look the same as the beast from the Disney movie, however there’s some blonde highlights in his fur and he’s much more aggressive and intimidating to look at. His fangs more emphasized and he has a much softer appearance; like that of a huge pomeraninan.

-        Ok…. no thoughts head empty just thinking about katsuki having an even huskier voice now that he’s transformed into a beast.

Katsuki Bakugo, who was ashamed of his newly transformed monstrous appearance, shut himself in his castle, The rose the old woman had offered was truly an enchanted rose, which would bloom until his twenty-first year.  If he could learn to love another, and earn her love in return by the time the last petal fell, then the spell would be broken.  If not, he would be doomed to remain a beast for all time.  As the years passed, he fell into despair, and lost all hope, for who could ever learn to love an explosive beast?

-        Significant members of Katsuki’s posse who were turned into magical items were Eijiro Kirishima, his castle maître d' whom had turned into a candelabra, his annoying majordomo, Tenya Ilda became a pendulum clock, the head housekeeper, Ochaco Uraraka had turned into an enchanted teapot, the vice-head housekeeper, Denki Kaminari had become a little tea cup, Mina Ashido, the lady-in-waiting became an enchanted wardrobe, and lastly, Hanta Sero, the Castle’s Valet and Chaffeur, became a coat rack.

-        All of Katsuki’s servants try their very best to make their prince change his ways, however, to no avail, their efforts have been fruitless. They were about to lose hope as Bakugo was about turn 21, which meant the rose would no longer bloom until… you came.

-        Gran Torino, your grandfather, had gotten lost in the woods and ended up finding Bakugo’s castle to seek shelter, not knowing he had been trespassing all along. After Katsuki finds him, he throws him to the castle dungeon.

-        You were the spirited, headstrong and bookish “beauty” of the town, however only being admired for your looks and not for your intelligence. You really had enough of this village and wanted to get out of here asap but after your grandfather had told you to wait just a little bit more, even though you frankly had enough of Monoma, the ~most handsome~ yet the biggest jerk in town constantly asking for your hand in marriage.

-        The disappearance of your grandfather had prompted for you to search for him, leading you too, to the beast’s castle.

-        Once you get there, you are to be greeted by Bakugo in his very beastly form, terrifying you. However, you stood your ground, asking for your grandfather. Gran Torino is set free under the condition of you having to stay in the castle instead.

-        At your first night, you refuse to join him for dinner enraging him.

-        “Where is she?” Bakugo grits his teeth, growling at Ilda.

-        “Aha- Well- You see… she’s not coming.” Ilda mutters nervously, his clock hands waving in weird chopping gestures.

-        “WHAT!?” Bakugo’s voice echoes around the dining hall, He leaps out of the room, busting the doors open, whilst Kirishima, Ilda, and Ochaco follow suit.

-        He bangs the door, “OI OI OI I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO COME DOWN FOR DINNER?”

-        “I’m not hungry.” You reply softly.

-        “ HAH? YOU COME OUT OR I’LL BREAK DOWN THE DOOR!”

-        “Master Bakugo… I could be wrong, but that may not be the way to win a girl’s affection.” Kirishima speaks in a hushed whisper, grimacing.

-        “Please attempt to be a gentleman.” Ilda says slowly and matter of factly.

-        Bakugo grits his teeth, scrunching his eyebrows, pointing to the door. “But she’s being… SO DIFFICULT!” he turns to the door, as if wanting you to hear what he was saying.

-        “Gently… Gently…” Ochaco repeats, trying to calm the prince down.

-        Bakugo rolls his eyes and repeats his words more softly this time, “Oi… will you come down for dinner?”

-        “No.”

-        He turns to his servants once again, pointing to the door, his mouth forming into a pout.

-        “O- It would be my greateest pleasure if you would join me for dinner.” He could barely muster out the words. “Please?”

-        “No, thank you!”

-        “YOU CAN’T STAY THERE FOREVER!” He barks, “THEN GO AHEAD AND STARVE!” He storms out of the hall, running his way to his castle wing.

-        After you were saved by the beast from the wolves, you tend to his wounds. Bakugo was rather… stubborn and didn’t want you to touch it or even press hot compress onto it.

-        He continues to growl lowly, still seething from the pain, attempting to lick it just like any other canine would do.

-        “Don’t do that.” You try to stop him from doing so, he growls at you, moving his wounded arm away from you. The castle servants watch in fear, taking a few steps back.

-        “Just hold still.”

-        “GRRR! THAT HURTS!”

-        “If you hold still, it wouldn’t hurt as much!”

-        “IF YOU HADN’T RAN AWAY THIS WOULDN’T HAVE HAPPENED!”

-        “If you didn’t scare me, then I wouldn’t have run away!”

-        “PHAH! WELL YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE GONE TO THE WEST WING!”

-        “Well, you should learn how to control your temper!”

-        He was about to protest, until he couldn’t think of anymore good comebacks, he stops. he pouts and rests his head on his hand as a sign of defeat.

-        After that night, the two of you had finally warmed up to each other. Wanting to surprise you and at the suggestion of Kirishima and Ilda, Bakugo had finally given you the chance to explore the west wing. Surprising you by leading to you the castle’s huge and well-kept library. A place where he seeks solace and peace.

-        You never expected him to be someone so aggressive yet be so interested in reading and of other mediums of knowledge. You had a lot in common and a feeling was blossoming between the two of you. In turn, you help him act more like a gentleman.

-        You continue to spend time with him, not knowing that you were slowly but surely falling.

-        “There’s something sweet and almost kind, but he was mean, coarse and unrefined. And now he’s dear, and I’m unsure, I wonder why I didn’t see it there before?”

-        As much as bakugo denies that he isn’t in love with you, he’s actually always had. He had just feared that you would never love him in return.

-        With the help of the fashionista turned enchanted closet that is Mina, she brings out a beautiful golden ballgown hemmed with golden roses, with off the shoulder sleeves and golden gloves to complete the look. You tie some of your hair into a neat bun, with the majority trails down your neck in a beautiful and flowing motion.

-        Bakugo on the other hand, was dressed in such a refined and handsome way. He wore a golden vest over a white dress shirt with a white kerchief. And, to complete the look, his very trusting stylists, Kirishima and Kaminari styled him in black pants.

-        As you dance the night away, the chandelier adorned with sparkling crystals hanging above you, the mural in the ceiling looking ever so heavenly, and calming waltz music to accompany you… it was a dream come true.

-        You nestle your head onto Bakugo’s shoulder, the latter looking a bit surprised yet his mouth forming into a small smile as he continues to guide you by hold your hand, twirling you around and just dancing with you. No other peering or judgemental eyes to stop the two of you from doing so.

-        Did I mention that he was an amazing dancer? Perks of being a prince I guess, but it’s also one of his natural talents.

-        Bakugo lets you go back to your grandfather that same night, watching you leave with your horse on the balcony.

-        He loves you, so he has to let you go.

-        Monoma and the village people ambush the castle to kill the beast, the castle servants trying their best to keep them at bay and the ever so arrogant village hunter climbing his way to Bakugo, you rush to the scene, and as soon as Bakugo sees you, he regains his strength and sends Monoma falling down a pit.

-        Bakugo was able to go back to his quarters with you helping him down, taking one last look at you.

-        He smiles half-heartedly, still trying to catch his breath. “You came back…”

-        “Of course, I came back.” You fight the tears trying to form in your eyes, hugging him tightly and trying to comfort him in his last moments. “If only I’ve gotten here sooner.”

-        “I-it’s better this way.”

-        “We’re together now! Everything’s going to be fine…”

-        “At least, I got to see you one last time.”

-        “P-please… Don’t leave me… I love you.”

-        As the last rose petal was about to fall, Bakugo is knocked out and is slowly succumbing to his wounds. It is through your genuine care and love for him, along with his change of heart and new resolve (albeit still retaining most of his temperamental and pompous personality, he is able to keep it in check) he transforms back into a human.

-        Along with all those who lived in the castle turning back into human, the castle retaining it’s original bright and vibrant colors and atmosphere, you and Bakugo live your very own happily ever after.

Izuku Midoriya  –  as Hercules from Hercules

-        A babie Izuku had been sent down from godlihood to live as a mortal, as his parents, All Might, the God of Thunder, and Inko, the Goddess of Marriage had wanted to protect him from AFO, the God of the Underworld, who will take over Mount Olympus if Izuku does not take him down according to a prophecy.

-        He grows up as a simpleton, the adopted son of both farmers, dreaming to make it big out there, with very ambitious and pure dreams of becoming a hero.

-        But after, being belittled by his very own peers for not looking the part as he couldn’t control his gifted super strength, scrawny, timid, too pure for this world and quite weakhearted, Izuku wanted to prove to them that he will become a hero in the future.

-        “Sometimes… I feel like, I really don’t belong here. Like I’m supposed to be someplace else…” Izuku confesses sincerely, his adoptive father looking at him in worry as he did not want to stop the young boy from learning who he actually was and all the potential he has.

-        “If you found me then… where did I come from? Why was I left here?”

-        His adoptive parents hand him over a golden medal with a thunder and lightning symbol that was said to be hanging around his neck when they found him. This was his answer that raised more questions.

-        He embarks on his journey to find one of the temples of All Might, as this was the only thing the symbol on the medal could allude to.

-        Okay but go the distance fits Izuku so well! A pure and hopeful young boy seeking to make a difference in this world and just wanting to become a hero by the most wholesome means.

-  “I have often dreamed of a far off place, Where a hero's welcome would be waiting for me. Where the crowds would cheer, when they see my face, and a voice keeps saying this is where I'm meant to be…”

-        just imagining izuku’s boyish voice singing this is just aaaaaaa

-        He eventually finds one of the temples, learning that all along, he was the son of the legendary God. All Might tells him he must prove his worth and earn back his godhood by becoming a true hero.

-        His father tells him to go search for Shota Aizawa, the famed instructor who has taught many great heroes in his time. Gifting Izuku a Pegasus, he embarks on another journey again to find the man, so that he may be trained.

-        When he arrives at the home of Aizawa, the teacher had retired as none of his heroes have ever earned a constellation in the sky, prompting him to expel them.

-        Izuku however, explained to his soon-to-be teacher that he wasn’t like the others, and… he proved true.

-        Although Aizawa was hesitant at first, he liked the kid’s determination and sheer will, so he began to train him.

-        Maybe, he could make a difference.

-        After his training and after undergoing an amazing transformation, Izuku was finally ready to start his way to achieving Godhood and becoming a true hero.

-        On the way to a nearby city, Izuku encounters you, a totally not damsel in distress and totally not a pawn of AFO, being tormented by a minotaur.

-        Izuku saves you and you couldn’t help but notice how pure and how gentle he was. You thank him albeit with a tint of sarcasm, hoping the two of you would meet again as you venture deeper into the forest to go and meet with AFO, whom you made a deal with in order to bring back your lost lover from the dead- only for them to leave you soon after.

-        You were once a very soft and romantic person. So open to giving love to others and never shying away from any form of affection. However…

-        After that terrible experience, you developed a cynical outlook. Not taking slack from anybody, always keeping your distance, barely interacting with others and showing no interest in forming any genuine relationships with others ever since.

-        Izuku reminded you that there was still some good in this world.

-        His genuine innocence, his boyish yet handsome looks, his pure determination to save others and his charismatic wit just swept you off of your feat.

-        However, you still had to keep your distance. You just weren’t ready to trust anyone again after that what had happened.

-        Izuku finally reaches his destination, defeating a Hydra using both of his wits and his strength, as he becomes a celebrated hero around the city of Musustafu.

-        Since then, he jumped from city to city, striking down every otherworldly monster that AFO had created to try and defeat him, and making him somewhat of a celebrity.

-        Izuku, however, remained humble. Knowing full well that the fame he had gained was not needed in order to become a hero.

-        In fact, it was what could become a hero’s biggest downfall.

-        Whilst chilling around in a huge museum dedicated to Izuku’s efforts, you pay him a visit and the pure and wholesome boy, clearly enthralled by you since the beginning, became very flustered at the sight of seeing you.

-        You start playing with your words, flirtatiously manipulating him to get him to go on a date with you.

-        “(Y/N) by the gods, he’s so pure why would you do this?” you thought. “what did he do to deserve this from me?” yet, you were bound by a contract with the god of the underworld, so it’s not like you have any choice right?

-        You go on a date with him, and end up falling reeeeeeal hard.

-        The two of you end your date in a romantic park, filled with conveniently placed statues of couples and a statue of Izuku, in the middle, near the fountain for you to fawn over whilst singing one of the best Disney songs ever to.

-        Aizawa hastens him to leave as they still have training to do, but he doesn’t leave until he picks a white flower from a tree, giving it to you, and planting a soft kiss on your cheek.

-        Midoriya hops on his Pegasus and they flutter away as you continue to watch his figure travel farther and farther away from you.

-        You observe and play with the white rose on your hand, sighing dreamily, until you snap back into your senses and think about the matter at hand.

-        “Ugh… what’s the matter with me? You’d think a girl would learn.”

-        *Cue Music and the Muses known as Ochaco, Tsuyu, Momo, Mina and Jirou)

-        “Who d'you think you're kidding~ He's the earth and heaven to you. Try to keep it hidden, Honey we can see right through you. Girl you can't conceal it We know how you're feeling... who you thinking of~”

-        The muses continue the musical number, yet in your heart you just need to deny these new and fuzzy emotions you were feeling for Izuku.

-        “No chance no way I won't say it, no no. (You swoon you sigh why deny it oh oh) It's too cliche I won't say I'm in loveeee…”

-        After all the ordeals Izuku had to go through to save you, (literally jumping into the river styx to recover your soul) his willingness to sacrifice himself for you was the final key needed to ascend to Godhood, and so that he may join his parents and the other gods in Mount Olympus once more.

-        However, this would come at a cost, if he were to go back to Mount Olympus, that would mean he wouldn’t see you ever again, instead only being able to watch over you from up and above.

-        And so, he chooses to remain on Earth with you, and even without his godly status, he could remain as the striking and true hero he is.

-        The two of you watch the night sky as All Might forms a constellation on the sky just for Izuku. Not only making Aizawa also proud, but also as a sign that Izuku himself- (and your love) was worth seeing in the stars.

Shoto Todoroki – as Flynn Rider from Tangled

-        Ok this is a bit of a stretch and I KNOW IT IS

-        Fantasy au Shoto has a white horse, and Flynn rider befriends a white horse that hates him. that’s the closest similarity these two have.

-        Flynn rider is my favorite unofficial Disney prince, and shoto is my favorite mha boy so let’s just roll with this!!

-        Shoto Todoroki was a lost prince turned thief, and after he rebelled from his controlling and manipulative father, His only way of escape was if he turned to a life of thievery, hiding his identity and straying away from his mantle as the Prince of the Todoroki Family.

-        He was very rebellious and mischievous, yet was also stern and rather monotone at times. He would crack jokes, but they would fall flat most of time and despite being absolutely handsome and looking very charismatic and charming on the outside, he wasn’t the best at picking up any gestures or flirtatious remarks said to him.

-        He approached some thieves before and very innocently asked them how to live the life of a rogue, the bandits laughed at him but were nice enough to give him tips. The first advice they told Shoto was to take up a moniker. So that he wouldn’t be easily discovered or found by security officials. They jokingly called him The Half-Hot and Half Cold prince, because of his looks and his quirk.

-        Not knowing that he was an actual prince. A wayward prince to be specific.

-        Shoto didn’t care enough so he used the nickname given to them and went on his way to a different castle.

-        After abandoning his kingdom, he chooses to live freely by his own means, and making the most of his time as a free man and not as a prince. You only live once after all.

-        He then leaves for the Kingdom of Corona, being forced to create a trio with very unfriendly bandits, Sato and Koda. Their mission was to steal the crown on the eve of your birthday and hope to sell it for an absolutely impossible price.

-        After they successfully infiltrate the palace and steal the crown jewel, Shoto stacks the prized possession into his satchel, betraying Koda and Sato, using them as a scapegoat, and making his way to a nearby forest settlement where he may hide and then move on to the next kingdom.

-        However, he underestimated the castle guards as they were able to find traces of him. Shoto, not wanting to back down from a fight, uses his ice quirk to prevent the guards from following him in any further into the forest. (He refuses to use his fire quirk due to its relation to his father)

-        Knowing that it wouldn’t take long before the castle guards would find him again, he had to go somewhere and hide first.

-        He then sees an obscure and weirdly placed tower in the middle of the forest, thinking that he may take refuge there. And so, Shoto uses his ice quirk once more to elevate himself onto the only open window of the tower.

-        He was about to start adjusting to his new surroundings as he steps foot inside, until…

-        BANG!

-        The last thing he heard was the sound of a clanging frying pan.

-        Unbeknownst to him, he was hit on the head by said frying pan.

-        Shoto wakes up to see that he was tied to a chair and his precious satchel gone by his side. He observes his surroundings to see that he was not tied by a rope, but instead tied using someone’s long and luscious hair. Hair so long that it was scattered all around the room.

-        “Is this… hair?”

-        You appear from the darkness, a very smug look spread upon your face, gripping the frying pan tightly.

-        You were the lost princess of the kingdom of Corona. You were kidnapped by Mother Midnight, and she raised you as your own, keeping you locked in the tower so that she can use the regeneration powers coming from your hair to make herself younger.

-        Each year, the king and the queen release lanterns in the sky on your birthday, hoping for your safe return.

-        It was too much of a coincidence. You know in your heart that the lanterns are meant for you. Yet, Mother Midnight constantly forbids and refuses you from leaving the tower.

-        “Who are you? And how did you find me?” You grit your teeth, interrogating him, your frying pan ready to hit on him if he dares to make a move.

-        Tsuyu, your pet chameleon and best friend was watching the half-and-half man intently.

-        “I’m the Half Hot- Half Cold Prince.” He says simply, barely moving and showing any emotion. You stare back at him, puzzled. What the heck was wrong with this guy?

-        “I mean, your actual name.” You repeat yourself as you slowly continue to approach him.

-        “Oh. I’m Shoto. Shoto Todoroki.” He says plainly once again. “Can I have my satchel back please?”

-        “Nope.” You reply, popping the p. “Why are you even here for the first place? Is it for my hair!?”

-        “He tilts his head in confusion, “Of course not. I was being chased and saw this tower, so I used my quirk and got up here. Now, may I please have my satchel back?”

-        “Hmm… if you say you’re from the outside then… I need you to take me to the lights.” You climb up your room balcony, pulling the curtain away to reveal the beautiful mural you made in dedication to the lanterns that are released from the kingdom every year during your birthday. “Then, I’ll give you your satchel.”

-        He looks at the mural in awe for a moment then breathes a hefty sigh, “Alright. We have a deal.”

-        You untie him from your hair. He stands up quickly and was about to descend down the tower. “I can use my quirk to bring us down-“

-        “Nah.” You hold up your hand in front of him, throwing your hair down and using it as a swing as you glide down with grace.

-        Your eyes meet the grass and you take a deep breath before you take your first step on it and then…

-        “My life will finally begin.” You take in your surroundings, feeling overwhelming happiness about to burst inside you.

-        Shoto catches up to you, using his quirk to slide down the tower. He crosses his arms, at the sight of seeing you jumping around like a little chipmunk who has not seen any land, a contempt look plastered upon his face, just wanting to get this job done and head on to the next kingdom he could go to.

-        “THIS IS AMAZING!” You watch him resting by the tree, leaning on it. You kick a pile of leaves to get his attention as you twirl around in your place, still taking in all these wonderful sights.

-        “Look. We have to get to the kingdom grounds as soon as possible or else-“

-        “It’s (Y/N).”

-        “Excuse me?”

-        “I’m (Y/N). I just remembered that I didn’t tell you that a while ago. Sorry!” You smile cheekily at him and because of how adorable you looked; he gave you a pass.

-        “Alright. Let’s go then, (Y/N).

-        Your adventure was absolutely chaotic. From entering a tavern full of scary bandits, for them to actually be softies all this time who were willing to help you see the lights. When the castle guards track down Shoto in the tavern, the bandits help you escape through a hidden passage, but find yourselves stuck in a flooding cave.

-        Thinking that this was the end of both of your adventures and your lives, Shoto reveals to you that he was the missing prince of the Endeavor Kingdom and you also reveal to him that your hair glows when you sing.

-        Bingo.

-        Flower gleam and glow… Let your powers shine… Make the clock reverse… Bring back what once was mine.” You sang softly, your hair began to emanate a glowing light, as it served as a guide to get you out of the cave.

-        Shoto’s hand was injured due to the very rough and dangerous properties inside of the cave and so, you heal him with the powers of your hair.

-        Once again, repeating the s­ong he had wanted to hear escape from your lips once more, your hair begins to glow as the wound on his palm was no more.

-        He looks at you in awe. Noticing details about you that he hasn’t noticed before. How your eyes twinkled differently, like a star from a night sky. Your smile always radiating sunshine, and your aura emanating nothing but warmth and comfort.

-        He was in love with you.

-        How long did it take for him to realize that?

-        “Are we almost there?” You wave your hand in front of his face and he snaps back into reality. “Ah yes. We’ll be in the village where the festivities will take place.”

-        “THERE ARE FESTIVITIES!?”

-        You reach the kingdom the morning after and began to partake in the festivities. All that Shoto could do was watch and admire you from afar as you danced and make merry with the townsfolk; not until you pulled him into the middle of the dance.

-        He was awkward and wasn’t so used to having all this attention around him ever since he left his royal life, but you guide him well in the dance floor, getting lost in the moment, the two of you gaze at each other’s eyes, and the cheers of the townspeople unfortunately snapping you out of the moment.

-        That night, the king and the queen, along with all of the townsfolk, flock to their boats for the annual cruise and lantern releasing.

-        To surprise you, Shoto was able to snatch and rent a boat. The two of you board on it that night, and Shoto rows all the way to the middle of the lake and get a clear view of the ethereal spectacle that was about to take place.

-        The first lantern, released by the king and queen, floats solely by itself. You rush to the other side of the boat, the boat rocking furiously due to the excitement. Your handsome companion on the other hand, was trying to keep the boat into place.

-        You hold on to the edge of the boat as other lanterns follow suit. The huge boats around you were releasing their lanterns too.

-        You look up at the sky, watching the lamps color the night. It was such a beautiful moment. Watching these floating lights reminds you of a comfort and inexplicable feeling from within. There was something about the light emanating from these paper lanterns, some of them bumping into each other, creating unique shadows, like that of shooting stars who were about to ascend back into the night sky.

-        Lanterns continue to light up the night sky, as if they were like bright dreams. Lighting everyone’s resolve and everyone’s hearts.

-       “All those days watching from the windows, All those years outside looking in. All that time never even knowing, just how blind I've been. Now I'm here, blinking in the starlight, Now I'm here, suddenly I see. Standing here, it's all so clear, I'm where I'm meant to be. And at last I see the light. And it's like the fog has lifted And at last I see the light. And it's like the sky is new, And it's warm and real and bright, And the world has somehow shifted. All at once everything looks different… Now that I see you.”

-        After you felt too immersed into the beauty of the lights, you turn back to Shoto who was holding on to two lanterns that the two of you could release. A loving smile present on his face.

-        You smile back at him, and the both of you release it into the sky.

-        “All those days chasing down a daydream… All those years living in a blur… All that time never truly seeing things, the way they were.”

-        The two of you look up to see the floating lights arise and you were immersed once again. Shoto fixes his gaze on you, admiring your beauty and your enthusiasm to see the lights you’ve always dreamed of seeing. He could do nothing but smile at you, as he’s truly fallen in love. He really has. His heart thumping loudly at the presence and the warmth that you’ve given him. Something that he had been seeking for so long.

-        Now she's here shining in the starlight, Now she's here suddenly I know.”

-        You continue look up. A lantern engraved with a sun symbol approaches your boat, and you point at it, pushing it up at the sky.

-        “If she's here, it's crystal clear… I'm where I'm meant to go.”

-        Shoto knew this was his only chance. His smile turning into that of a frown, as thoughts of not seeing you again came across his mind. He grabs your hand, touching it softly. You perk up a little bit at this gesture, but you smile back at him. Your eyes glimmering love and warmth once again.

-        You hold both of his hands, grasping it firmly yet tenderly. The two of you gaze at each other’s eyes again, this time no one were to interrupt. This moment would just be between the two of you.

-        You notice how beautiful Shoto’s heterochromatic eyes were from up close, the love shown in his eyes could only be for you and you feel your heart racing at that thought.

-         And at last I see the light, And it's like the sky is new. And it's warm and real and bright, And the world has somehow shifted… All at once everything is different… Now that I see you.”

[itadores]

my beautiful boy.

➼ note: this is so unbearably soft

➼ pairing: itadori yuuji x gender neutral reader

➼ word count: 1.2k

➼ genre/warnings: fluff, kissing

“You’re beautiful.”

Itadori blinks. And then blinks again. The silence that proceeds after your statement doesn’t bother you; you know it takes him some time to process things. You closely observe his expression and envision the wheels in his head turning as you wait for your words to sink in.

“Huh?” You don’t bother to stifle your laughter at the response that greets you after waiting for a minute or so. His head is tilted at an angle, face fixed into an adorably confused expression: brows knitted together as his mouth hangs slightly agape.

“I said you’re beautiful, Yuuji.” It takes you a few moments to compose yourself, loud laughter quieting down to soft giggles so you can be heard clearly. Your amusement seeps into your words, and Itadori can hear the smile that crosses your face.

So, he did hear you correctly the first time. Your words bounce around Itadori’s head once again. Itadori wouldn’t consider himself particularly unattractive. In all honesty, he’s pretty content with his appearance, but then again he’s never really paid all that much attention to his looks. Although, he’s confident that he’s never been called beautiful before.

“Really? I don’t think anybody’s ever told me I was beautiful before,” he thinks aloud, shifting his weight back onto his palms and staring up at the sky. It’s a nice day, today; the sun hangs high in the sky shrouded by only a smattering of loose wispy clouds. The heat isn’t sweltering, which Itadori is grateful for. He loathes the way the suffocating heat of Summer makes his clothes stick to him with sweat.

He much prefers the subdued heat of a day like today in which there’s a subtle breeze that brushes across his skin and causes the leaves to whistle in delight.

“Well, you are.” You beam with confidence and resolution as if the words you speak are fact and not a matter of opinion. You mindlessly tug at the strands of grass that lie beside you. “It sounds cheesy, but you’re beautiful inside and out.”

You feel no shame expressing the way you feel because Itadori really is that beautiful to you.

He is light despite the burden he carries and the tragedies he’s witnessed. He’s the kindest person you know, always putting others before himself, always with an easy grin on his face. Itadori cares so much for others, which you deeply admire, but you worry that it will one day lead to his ruin. He cares so much for others, but not nearly enough for himself.

He regards his life so flippantly and you wish he would get it through his thick skull that his life is as valuable as others. That his life cannot be easily discarded, that his life matters. That there is more to him than simply being Sukuna’s vessel.

No matter how hard he attempts to brush past things, you can see the toll it’s taking on him. You only hope that Itadori trusts you enough to ease the weight etched into his bones.

You let your head fall against your shoulder in order to properly admire the male sitting beside you.

The full leaves that hang overhead scatter the rays of sunlight with every rustle they make. Soft shadows flicker across Itadori’s face before he glows once more under the warm beams of light. Whoever said brown eyes were boring must have been mad because you’re certain that they’ve never had the pleasure of seeing something as wonderful as Itadori’s warm brown eyes glinting underneath the diffused sunlight. Your eyes linger over the thin scars underneath Itadori’s eyes for a brief moment; you’re mildly surprised that Sukuna hasn’t popped out and said anything yet, but you won’t question it.

Your eyes trail the slope of his nose before falling down to his lips, pink and faintly chapped, and you wonder if they would taste sweet like the dessert you just shared. You lean closer to Itadori, lessening the little space there is in between you with ease. Itadori doesn’t move, just watches, as you slowly bring your hand up towards his face. The pad of your thumb ghosts over his bottom lip before you move it to his lower cheek and brush off a cake crumb.

You tilt your head up and meet Itadori’s waiting gaze. His brown eyes are bright, and you find yourself easily entranced by their warmth, not that you mind in the slightest. You allow your hand to rest against his cheek as your heart is overcome with fondness for the male whose face you’re cradling.

“I love you.”

It’s a whisper, barely louder than the gentle breeze that envelops you both. Itadori’s face nearly splits into a wide grin upon hearing your words.

“I love you most.” He tilts his head to press a chaste kiss to the inside of your wrist before tugging you even closer to him. You fall against his chest with a sharp exhale and the two of you dissolve into laughter. Once you quiet down and all that is left is you and him and the sunlight bathing you both in warmth, Itadori gently pulls your head down, and his lips meet your own in a kiss.

Your hands rest against his chest, loosely gripping the material of his shirt, as your lips slot over Itadori’s lips. He readjusts his grip and moves his hand down to the back of your neck to deepen the kiss. You smile against his lips when you realize you were correct in guessing that he would taste like the cake you had eaten together.

When the need to breathe proves to be too much, you separate from one another with a content sigh. A flush has crept up Itadori’s neck, flooding his cheeks with color, while his lips are swollen a pretty shade of pink.

“You’re beautiful,” Itadori murmurs against the crook of your neck. His words are softer than usual but no less genuine. The way he says it leaves no room for argument so you simply press a kiss to the crown of his head in response before running your fingers through tufts of pink hair. He buries his face further into your neck, peppering your skin with kisses until you squirm in his firm grasp.

“Yuuji, that tickles,” you whine, squealing when he nips at the area right below your jaw. You attempt to push him back, but Itadori’s grip on your waist doesn’t allow you to do so. He migrates his kisses from your neck to your face, littering quick pecks over every inch of your skin that he can reach.

“Mhm, it’s your fault for being so cute. How am I not supposed to kiss you?” Itadori pauses, leaning back slightly to pout at you. You playfully roll your eyes before leaning down to press a kiss of your own in the space in between his brows.

“You’re an idiot,” you mutter.

A large dopey grin quickly stretches across Itadori’s face.

“Yeah, but I’m your idiot.”

You rake your fingers through strands of pink before resting your hand against his cheek, gently running your thumb over one of the scars right below his eyes.

“Yeah, you are,” you fondly agree.

There truly aren’t enough words to describe how utterly enamored you are with Itadori Yuuji.

[nevermindirah]

hi <3 if you don't mind answering for a WIP, #1 (What inspired you to write the fic this way?) for sir nile pleeeease

Hi!! Sir Nile!!!!!!!!

Ooh ok so there's two parts to this, the structure and the style.

The structure part is that I started out wanting to make this fic an example of how possible it is to give equal attention to all three main ships in this fandom. Look how fun this is! So many kinds of queer love all in one fic! I was hoping this would bring some new readers my way, and a little part of me was hoping it would encourage more people to start doing this. But, like, that didn't happen. People ship what they ship and they write what they write and me going out of my way to lavish attention on Joe/Nicky (who I love in canon! and once upon a time loved reading fic about before this fandom wore me the fuck down!) wasn't going to cause anyone to reciprocate by lavishing attention on BoN. This is 90% of why I had to take a long break from writing Sir Nile. (The other 10% is the general ADHD preventing me from doing things I want to do, sigh.)

When I come back and write the rest of it I still want to have fun with the Andy/Quynh getting together storyline and the whole group's friendships but I had an enemies-to-lovers Joe/Nicky plot thread planned out that has been done a million times and just isn't where my excitement is. What really speaks to me about this fic enough to fight my ADHD and write it is genderqueer Nile and the humble tank who's in love with her and turns out to be super chill about her gender stuff.

And now on to style! I just thought it'd be fun to change up my language use. My career is writing-heavy and it requires me to stay in a few very specific tones / styles / sets of vocabulary, and I love branching out from that in fic, though I'm very aware that the more explicitly political stuff in my fic sometimes bleeds into the didactic style of some of my writing for work. It's total historical nonsense, and at this point it's been so long that I can't even remember if I use thee/thy/thou anywhere beyond the fic's title let alone use them correctly, but it's a history-flavored nonsense Knight's Tale au that's the fun!!

Anyway Sir Nile is having gender feelings as they proceed along the hero's journey and I'm looking forward to the day when I return to this fic and Sir Nile experiences heartwarming story-concluding emotions! And lest you were worried: SIR NILE WILL EXPERIENCE KISSING