#and then it's like 'what do you mean she's sympathetic?????'
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What chapters would you say are your favourite characterisations for each of the voices? I ask because a lot of the way they act is very much based on what chapter they’re in :3c
Ooooohhh, that's a good one…… I take all the different ways they're portrayed in these chapters in consideration to inform different facets of them, but if I were to choose a favorite, let's see–
Contrarian: As much as I like seeing their more spiteful side in Fury and Apotheosis, and their line readings in Razor is fucking top-notch, nothing can beat the character arc they go through in Stranger for me. It's just. so good. Love this clown who's full of resentment and guilt <3
Cheated: Torn between Cage and Wraith…… Wraith, because seeing her bond with Cold over their mutual hatred for the narrator is just so fun, and how she goes about suggesting throwing Wraith in the pit ("Fuck those two. Let's flip the table!" how Contrarian of you Cheated) is just incredible to me. But I also really like how Cage shows that as sympathetic as Cheated can be, she can still fall into doing cruel things just to assert control over her circumstances, even to her own detriment. That's some good stuff.
Skeptic: EotN Skeptic, my beloved…… I feel like after pris-cut, people started focusing too much on Cage for Skeptic's characterization. Which doesn't feel fair, when that's him at his most stressed and desperate to cling to any semblance of control. It's still a very interesting look into his character, but people seem to be taking that as his default, and not him in dire circumstances. In Eye of the Needle, though, Skeptic is much calmer and even friendly, trying to gas Stubborn up to get him to help. He has a theory and a very simple set of circumstances to test, and even seems a bit excited to test it. Also shout out to Den Skeptic, the moment when he realizes the Princess is more than just a moment is everything to me. He's got low empathy, but he tries to be fair to others <3
Smitten: Sighs, really wish we got to see more of him, really feels like out of anyone, his character is really underexplored, which is a shame. Character-wise, though, gotta give it to Burned Grey. He's just…… so fucking devastated, lashing out at everyone around him, and the way he quickly switches up the moment we see the princess aikskkdmdk This chapter is what really shows where Smitten's priorities are to me. Her safety. Her happiness. At the expense of anyone and anything, even himself. And if he has to hurt, to burn alive, to get to it, he will.
Stubborn: Listen…… the way he managed to have such good chemistry with Adversary despite never speaking to her directly is just sijsjddjjdjdjf SO GOOD SIKSKDKJDKFJ. And I love, LOOOOOVE how he isn't the cliché 'ew, emotions' kinda tough guy. No, he feels, and he feels STRONGLY, you can even get him and Ada to sob in this route I'm just simskjdmdjjdjfj THEM!!!
Broken: Call me a contrarian (heh), but I love seeing Broken getting worse and doubling down on his devotion lol. It's more engaging, OK? And how spiteful and even mean he gets in Tower-Fury is just so good akmskkdmmdjdjd
Hunted: Den with Skeptic…… Just. Seeing this lil guy who was so so afraid of Beast finally get to understand her, to connect to her, and be the one urging you to reach out to her is SO GOOD. Also, the ending where you end up trapped under the rocks with her, when Hunted realizes there's no escape, and it just says it'll lay down and rest for a moment…… OUGH.
Opportunist: Gotta go with Wraith for him too aikskdjdjdjdis Not only is him hilarious there, but also surprisingly competent??? He actually manages to successfully suck up to the princess here???? The surprise factor of it matched with just how funny he is really bumped him up for me when I first saw this version of the route lol
Cold: Another one where their own route just can't be beaten to me akmskddmxmdm. I just love how even after murdering her in cold blood and suggesting we try to kill her again, Cold still gets along with the Princess so well. I also just really like his insights in this route when you decide to free her, about where does a world ends and another begins. It just goes to show how detached he is from reality. (Also, him casually insulting the Narrator every other sentence is just too good lol).
Paranoid: Apotheosis……… What I think is interesting though, is that while on the outside, it looks like Paranoid is 'winning' here, I think she's never been losing it more. She just confirmed that there are no fucking rules. This world is whatever they think it can be. And for someone with a lot of intrusive thoughts (no, it isn't Cold who's 'intrusive thoughts personified', stop calling him that, it's medically inaccurate and honestly insulting to people who actually suffer from intrusive thoughts), the mere idea of it is TERRIFYING. And I think she reaizes that just as they go to that epic fight, which is why she laughs like that, and why the fall is so hard on her and immediately makes her back down and feel like everything's doomed again. For a person full of delusions and intrusive thoughts, the construct is a fucking nightmare world (pun intended).
Hero: Now, for him, I just can't choose one route for his characterization. Out of all the voices, I think he's the most important one to really take into account how he can act in each route when characterizing him. I love his complexities and different facets so much, I made them into a plural system wkmsdmdkdmd he's just. sighs. Hero, my beloved <3
#Me: *thoughtful analysis of the voices' characterization*#Also Me: WIMSKJSMDJDJFDJ THEM SO GOOD!!!#The Duality of Fox#slay the princess#stp voices#stp meta#sal rambles#mailbox
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Month 20 - Leaffall
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“I want to come,” Floodstrike said firmly, walking sharply in step with Goldenstar as she went about the final preparations for her meeting with the city cats. She stopped, gave a pained sigh, and looked her apprentice over. His jaw was tightly set, his forepaws sheathing and unsheathing their claws in the grass with excess energy. At least, she noticed, his eyes weren’t raw and red anymore.
“Floodstrike,” she began carefully.
“I know,” he interrupted, “this is important and you don’t want me to mess it up but, I promise, I won’t do anything stupid. I just want to be there in case things go wrong.”
Goldenstar couldn’t help but let out a sympathetic breath through her nose. “I understand,” she said, “I really do, but this meeting took weeks to arrange. I’m only bringing warriors who I can trust to stay cool headed.”
“You can trust me, Goldenstar,” he begged, leaning in. “Please. I need to be there.”
Goldenstar took a slow, deep breath, closed her eyes, and then let it out with a huff. “Fine. I’m trusting you.” Opening her eyes, she searched his face for his reaction.
“Thank you!” he deflated slightly with relief. “I promise you won’t regret it.”
“Go eat a meal and tell Oddstripe to make you a portion of traveling herbs,” she said with a twitch of her ear. Floodstrike nodded dutifully and bounded off towards the healer’s den. Goldenstar sighed again.
After a beat to collect herself, Goldenstar resumed her preparations. She stopped Russetfrond and made sure that there wasn’t anything they hadn’t already discussed that needed her attention before she left. This time he didn’t seem resistant to staying home which was a relief. She honestly couldn’t blame him. If something happened to Bluekit and Yellowkit while he was away, she knew he would never forgive himself.
Next, she went to check on Aldertail and found her with Oddstripe making the bundles of herbs for the journey. She went over the emergency protocol with Aldertail again, making sure that she knew exactly who to go to if another attack was launched while they were away. Aldertail nodded, seeming reassured by the repetition of the plan, which had been Goldenstar’s intention.
Before she left, Oddstripe asked, “Is it true you agreed to let Floodstrike go along?”
“Yeah,” she nodded, belly clenching nervously.
“Okay,” Oddstripe nodded and looked down. “Just make sure he comes home safe, alright?”
“Of course,” said Goldenstar with genuine fervor. “I won’t take a single risk I don’t have to.”
“Oh, thank you,” the healer sniffled and smiled up at her and she felt her chest tighten. She hoped she would be able to keep her promise.
When she stepped outside, Scorchplume fell into step beside her and said, “SkyClan is here. Orangestar should be waiting for us at the thunderpath.”
“Good,” she nodded. “Let's get everyone together and get ready to go.”
“Alright,” Scorch said without looking at her, the picture of a regal advisor. “I’ll fetch Songdust. Why don’t you grab Coyotechaser?”
“And Floodstrike,” Goldenstar said, bracing herself.
“What?” Scorch’s regality dissipated like someone smacking a dandelion puff. Keeping her voice low but her tone sharp, she whispered, “No. No way! Goldenstar, we talked about this, we can’t afford any rash behavior!”
“I know, I know, but he swore he would be on his best behavior,” tried Goldenstar.
“So did Fogpaw,” huffed Scorch, “that doesn’t mean she gets to tag along!”
“We could use the extra muscle,” she argued.
“At what cost?” Scorchplume lashed her tail, took a deep breath and said, “Look. I love you, Goldie,” (and Goldenstar puffed up with affection, much to Scorch’s annoyance) “but your judgment is impaired here! You’re too soft on him. It isn’t fun but he’s just going to have to suck it up and stay home and you’re going to have to suck it up and tell him so.” It took a good deal of effort for Goldenstar not to squirm under Scorch’s piercing scowl.
“I understand where you’re coming from,” she said firmly, “but the choice has already been made. It’s gonna look bad if I undo my decision because you told me to.” Scorchplume looked askance, ears swiveling backward. Quickly, Goldenstar added, “Besides, I’m trusting Floodstrike and I’m asking you to trust me. I don’t want to make you feel like I cornered you into going along with this or anything.” She gently laid her tail over Scorch’s, hoping that she hadn’t just accidentally threatened her kind-of-sort-of-partner.
Scorch was still for a moment, likely processing something behind her mask. Then she said, “It’s fine, you couldn’t corner me if you tried.” Goldenstar chuckled a little and wrapped her tail more tightly around Scorch’s.
“That’s good. I promise that if he does anything out of line I’ll send him home.”
“You’d better,” Scorch said, looking up at her. “We probably won’t get a second chance at this.”
“I know,” Goldenstar said with the appropriate solemnity. “I won’t let this opportunity slip through our claws.”
Scorch sighed, nodded, and bumped her head against Goldenstar’s forehead. “Alright.”
“Goldenstar!” Coyotechaser called over from where she was standing with Greyvoice and Couragecry who were scheduled to join a border patrol. “Are we ready to go?”
“Just about!” she called back, “We’ll grab our traveling herbs and head out.”
~~~
After meeting up with Orangestar, the group - Goldenstar, Scorchplume, Songdust, Floodstrike, and Coyotechaser - crossed the thunderpath and headed for the city. The afternoon stretched into evening and as they approached, Goldenstar watched in wonder as the city lights came to life one by one.
“Remember,” Scorchplume told them as they walked, “When we get to the meeting, I’ll do the speaking for all of us. If you have something you want said, let me know and I’ll phrase it in a way that the city cats will respond favorably to.”
“Right,” Coyotechaser said cautiously.
“Also,” Goldenstar said, “As far as the city cats know, I’m the leader of all the Clans. At this point, we think it's best to leave it that way. The less they actually know about us, the better. While we’re in the city, you and Orangestar are my advisors, just like Scorchplume.”
“I can see the reason in that,” admitted the SkyClan deputy.
“In that case,” said Orangestar, “it might be good to avoid calling me Orangestar, just in case.”
“That’s smart,” said Goldenstar, smiling fondly at her friend. “Guess you’ll be Orangeleaf again for a while.”
“Guess so,” laughed Orangestar bashfully.
They padded along for a while longer before they reached the large gravel path that led into the city. Goldenstar led them along the edge of it, trying to steady her nerves. This was where things got dangerous. The plan relied on them drawing as little attention to themselves as possible and the closer they got, the more likely it was that they would be seen and possibly attacked.
Her fears were realized when they spotted a small cluster of cats loitering across the gravel from them, just little ginger and white and grey smudges in the fading light. Coyotechaser growled a low warning to the others, tail bristling, and Goldenstar held her tail out behind her to try and settle the group.
“Easy,” she said.
The group of cat shapes up ahead stood and started loping back to the city and Floodstrike lunged after them before Goldenstar had a chance to say anything. Quickly, Songdust hooked a paw out in front of him, tumbling him forward. He caught himself before hitting the gravel and turned back to glare at her.
“Floodstrike!” Goldenstar hissed so that the city cats wouldn’t be able to hear. “What are you doing?”
“They’re going to get reinforcements!” he cried indignantly.
“Or,” Scorchplume cut in sharply, “they’re with Rudy and attacking them would have ruined the entire meeting!” Orangestar glanced from Scorch to Goldenstar with worry and Coyotechaser squinted inscrutably at Floodstrike. Songdust just looked pitying. Under all these gazes, Floodstrike’s big ears wilted behind him and he pressed his mouth into a thin line.
“I’m sorry, Goldenstar,” he said, “I- I thought I was helping.”
“I know,” she sighed, avoiding the pointed look that Scorch was giving her. “Let’s keep going. We don’t have time to waste out in the open.” She ducked her head and started going, knowing that a number of unpleasant conversations were going to be had eventually.
They walked in silence the rest of the way to Luna’s garden. The little lilac kittypet was waiting for them on top of the fence and smiled in greeting, ushering them over the fence with her tail.
“Welcome! Welcome!” she purred, blushing when she made eye contact with Floodstrike. “Schmidt should be here soon, you can wait under the bench by the hydrangeas.”
“Thank you,” Goldenstar thanked her and hopped the fence with a quick bound.
When her paws hit the ground, Scorchplume was right behind her, saying softly, “I told you not to bring him.”
“I know,” Goldenstar whispered back. “I’ll handle it.”
“Good,” huffed Scorch. She led the way to the bench, which was good since Goldenstar had no idea what a bench was in the first place, and the other cats followed, clustering underneath the odd wooden structure with their backs against the wilting hydrangea blossoms.
“You trust this Schmidt cat?” Coyotechaser asked.
“I do,” Goldenstar nodded.
“He kept me safe while I was in the city,” said Songdust. “He’s a good cat, if a bit idealistic.”
“That’s good,” mewed Orangestar.
Goldenstar glanced past her to where Floodstrike was sitting, tail curled around his paws and she swallowed in shame when he met her gaze a second later. He could tell he was in trouble and they were both miserable about it. She quickly averted her gaze and tried to go over the meeting points in her mind.
A short time later, two cats crested the fence and followed Luna over to the bench. The first cat was Schmidt, a kind smile on his face as he approached, and the second was a cat who looked exactly like him but with a slightly brighter tint to his ginger fur, much like Orangestar. The second cat followed closely behind Schmidt. His eyes wandered the yard for any sign of danger but his face bore a politely empty expression rather than a threatening or anxious one. Goldenstar stepped out from under the bench to meet them and the others followed suit.
“Evenin’, Goldenstar,” said Schimdt with a well mannered dip of the head. “This is my brother, Westen. He insisted on comin’ to watch my back.” At his introduction, Westen dipped his head in kind and briefly flashed a smile.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Westen,” Goldenstar said.
“Please, ma’am, call me Wes,” said Wes with a twang and a humble smile. Goldenstar couldn’t help but smile herself.
“Of course,” she said. Then, back to Schimdt, “Is everything ready for the meeting?”
“As ready as it’ll ever be,” Schimdt said with a nervous huff. “We’ll be meetin’ on a friend’s balcony at sundown. We prolly ought to head over there now though. Don’t wanna get caught like a squirrel in a bottle.” Goldenstar nodded instead of asking what a bottle or a balcony was.
“Right, let’s get going then,” she said.
Scorchplume cleared her throat, looking strained.
Goldenstar frowned. “Right. Floodstrike, I’m going to need you to stay here.”
“Goldenstar, please!” Floodstrike protested. “It was one mistake, I promise it won’t happen again.”
“You already promised me and you broke your promise,” Goldenstar said. “I’m sorry. Stay here with Luna. If something goes wrong we’ll have someone send you for help.”
Floodstrike opened his mouth to protest then closed it with a soft clack. Looking down, he sighed, “Alright.” Goldenstar smiled, bittersweet. She was proud, at least, that he hadn’t tried to keep arguing.
“Alright, let’s go,” she said, and Schmidt nodded and turned to lead the way.
On the edge of her hearing, Goldenstar caught Wes whispering to Luna, “Miss Luna, will you be alright on your own with this fella?”
“Oh, don’t worry, Wes,” Luna purred, “We get on peachy.” Then she laughed like she’d told a joke.
This seemed enough to put Wes at ease and he said simply, “Alright then. Don’t forget to fetch your Folk if you need anythin',” before slinking back into place behind Schmidt’s right shoulder. Goldenstar chuckled a bit and hung back to speak with Floodstrike.
“Hey,” she said softly and he looked up with big, guilty eyes. “Don’t beat yourself up so bad you forget to enjoy yourself, ‘kay?”
“W-” Floodstrike frowned then glanced past her to Luna before blushing with understanding. “Oh. That’s- I’m not-”
“It’s alright,” Goldenstar laughed a little. “Whatever happens, it’ll be alright as long as you feel comfortable. Don’t forget to stand up for yourself.”
“Alright,” he swallowed dryly.
With that, Goldenstar bounded to catch up before anyone could call for her and the group hopped the fence and darted across the thunderpath towards the meeting place.
#clangenrising#clangen#clan gen#warrior cats#warriors#warrior cats oc#warriors oc#clangen oc#clan gen oc#Goldenstar#Floodstrike#Scorchplume#Songdust#Oddstripe#Coyotechaser#Orangestar#Luna#Schmidt#Wes#leaffall
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I think I know exactly what post you’re referring too and blocked that user (as well as all the people who liked the post) immediately after their string of posts that are horrifically inaccurate readings of both Orin and Minthara, but also joking about Minthara being forced to interact with her rapist for the rest of her life. I’m personally not a fan of the Orinthara ship because it is innately noncon and there is no way to argue that it isn’t, and I despise it being called toxic yuri. The only people I trust with the ship are Minthara fans because they are the only ones who understand the full dynamic between the two. There are some people, like the poster you’re referring too, who have total hate boners for her and only ship Orinthara as a means of punishing her in their heads. And it becomes so obvious that their desire to ship Orinthara is out of complete malice when they only have negative and violent opinions about Minthara and are using “toxic yuri” as a cover.
I can’t even imagine hating a character that much, but still thinking about them all the time. If there is a character I hate, I don’t spend any time thinking about them. At all. They choose to let Minthara live in their heads rent free and it bothers them for some reason, lol.
Yeah. I think that the differentiating factor is care.
To illustrate using a nonsexual, non-BG3 example, in one of my previous fandoms two writers both wrote fics in which the antagonist had a conversation with the protagonist about her crimes. In one fic, the protagonist talked down to the antagonist, listing out all the things she had done wrong while she ranted and raved and screamed. Then she died. Victory!
In the other, even as the antagonist grappled with the magnitude of her failures and the consequences thereof, the author kept her perspective in mind. They used flashbacks to her past to put the audience in her shoes and let her argue her case. And they did it so effectively that I have never felt more sympathetic to this antagonist than I did when reading that scene. She was still wrong. She still died. But the scene landed so much better. The character felt respected by the narrative, her death lacked the almost voyeuristic authorial glee that made the similar scene in the other fic honestly a bit uncomfortable to read.
In a similar vein, lots of Minthara fans write about Orin doing absolutely horrible things to Minthara. But because they care about Minthara (and often also about Orin, who is doing all this for understandable reasons given the absolute shitfuck of a situation that she's coming from) there's a level of respect for the character by the narrative even as she suffers. It's the energy of "I'm going to put my blorbo in situations," it's the phenomenon of taking your favorite and making them bleed because you care about their emotions. Because the point of tragedy is that even if it all ended poorly, it still mattered.
I've seen fic about Orin impregnating Minthara during her time as a slave to the Absolute done, and some of it was done very well. (Orin cut the fetus out of Minthara and killed it, because she's Orin and was actually written in character.) But it worked because the author cared about Minthara, about the horror of the situation, in a way those flippant comments that sparked this conversation did not.
In contrast, if a person who hates a character is talking about them suffering there's this general vibe of, "look at this bitch getting what she deserves", that hangs over the entire conversation like a haze. And because "toxic yuri" encompasses both scenarios but has progressive implications (ooh, look at me paying attention to female characters!) it can easily be used as a shield against criticism for that vibe.
The question, ultimately, both with this Orinthara situation and with the author I discussed above, is whether a person extends the same grace, the same sense of interiority and assumption of an inner life, to the female characters as they do their male faves. And the answer, very often, is "no."
#bg3#fandom#minthara#discussion#i debated it but i'm not putting this in the 0rin or 0rinthara tags bc ultimately its not about that#answered asks#thank you for the ask nonny!#this was an interesting discussion#though i ended up going on a bit of a tangent
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I think I can, if I try, just about persuade myself that Xander and Jesse were friends.
Partly because the ways in which Jesse behaves unpleasantly [his treatment of women who aren't attracted to him, his obvious self-hatred about being " a loser" who nobody wants to date; various lines that were presumably written as jokes but just come across as disproportionately mean-spirited insults] echo the ways Xander himself is also sometimes (to a lesser extent) unpleasant (especially in the first two seasons of the show). In both cases, I suspect the writers didn't quite realize how badly the character was coming across (doesn't Joss Whedon say in the DVD commentaries that some of the way Jesse behaves around Cordelia is based on things Whedon himself did as a teenager? which suggests a certain obliviousness about precisely how sympathetic this behaviour actually is).
Also, well, because you can maybe assume that Jesse is going through a (non-supernatural version) of what happens to Xander in The Pack (in that he's "turning into a sixteen year old boy", as Giles puts it) and that he didn't use to be quite so unbearable to be around (or so obsessed with Cordelia). And because the closest that Jesse ever comes to being sympathetic is when he tells Buffy he wants her to feel at home "unless you have a scary home", which -- if you try really, really hard -- you can maybe tie into the (later) implications we get about Xander's own home life [and hence conclude that on some level Jesse is aware of and sympathetic to the reality that some people -- people like Xander in particular -- do have "scary homes"].
But Willow? President of the "We hate Cordelia" Club Willow? Shy and soft-spoken computer loving nerd Willow? "I can spend my life waiting for Xander to go out with every other girl in the world before he notices me" Willow? Yeah, it just doesn't make sense to me at all that she and Jesse would be friends. The only thing they have in common is hanging out with Xander.
Actually, I'm not sure there is a point in either of the first two episodes in which Jesse or Willow refer to the other as a friend, is there? Or even hang out together except at school with Xander? They both get captured by vamps while at the Bronze on the same night, but they weren't there together. Willow tells Buffy in Welcome to the Hellmouth that she's in the Bronze because she "thought Xander was going to show up ... we're just friends", and in The Harvest Giles will tell Xander that, when he sees Jesse again, he won't be "looking at your friend". And vamp!Jesse will address Xander as "buddy". But Willow never calls Jesse a friend, that I can remember.
After Jesse is captured Willow talks about "wanting to help [Buffy]", but she doesn't show any real concern for Jesse himself. In fact, when Buffy goes to try to rescue him, and Xander is about to talk himself into chasing after her, Willow reassures him that "Buffy'll be okay". Not Jesse, but Buffy. And what's her immediate reaction to Buffy and Xander coming back and telling her that Jesse is something "worse than dead"? She says "at least you two are okay". And that's it, that's the whole of her reaction. Xander tells vamp!Jesse he's sorry and gets angry and talks about disliking vampires, but -- even in an episode were Jesse's death is acknowledged -- we never seen any emotional response to his death from Willow. She reacts far more to the death of Cordelia's boyfriend Kevin in Prophecy Girl, and Kevin is a character who (1) only exists for one episode and (2) Willow herself never interacts with.
So, yes, it rather beggars belief that Willow would be friends with Jesse and I don't think there's any on-screen evidence that they actually are friends in any real way. I don't think Willow would even hang out with Jesse between classes at school if he wasn't with Xander.
obviously the out-of-universe explanation for why jesse's name is never mentioned again after "the harvest" is that (a) while joss was tickled by the idea of immediately killing off a character he had set up to appear important, he had no desire to make a show with the dynamic of 'the hero and her two friends who are in mourning and traumatized over the death of their third friend who the hero failed to save', and also (b) the writers forgot he existed. but in-universe, given how many times it would have made sense and been in character for xander and/or willow to bring him up (such as in wacky stories from their childhood, or times when they are throwing buffy's failures in her face), i am forced to conclude that the reason jesse is never mentioned again is because neither of them actually liked him very much. he was just unpopular because he is unpleasant and so they let him hang out with them because they were unpopular too. but secretly they were kind of a bit relieved when he died because, well, he sucked and they didn't like him. and i'm sure they felt guilty about being relieved. but that didn't change the fact that they were. which is why neither of them ever mentions him again and never will
#btvs#of course as you note the real problem is that Whedon wanted the shock value of killing off a character who was teased as being important#but obviously didn't want the whole first season to be about that character's friends grieving him or Buffy blaming herself for it#so his death gets treated the exact same way almost every other student's death in the first season of the show does: nobody really cares
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taash said "they were doing it" and people ran with the interpretation of an npc that doesn't know solas or the history of the elvhenan even when bellara interjected and said, no, that's not right. that's not how it was for the elvhenan. they formed bonds before they had physical bodies. and people ran to doompost or create weird anti-solavellan shit even though mythal & solas refer to each other as old friends and when she releases him there is no tenderness or love in it. it is the act of unchaining a dog from his post, the stepping down of a general. but to each their own ig.
#let the record show i think love was there. do I personally perceive it as romantic / sexual? no.#mythal's perception of love & care is warped in and of itself#i think they loved each other. but she loved what she could take from him and what he could give in terms of service#not because she was romantically into him#also i wish we knew more about her & elgar'nan. her regret prison form says she holds no love for him anymore#and it makes me wonder when that love soured. was it when she was blighted? before that? was that love also born of duty and companionship?#this is the last post i'm gonna make ab this i think#bc i believe people are too caught up in the modern western ideas of love as thing we give solely to our romantic partners#and we literally have a character go ”our perception is warped bc of the age we live in” and some of you are still being purposefully obtuse#and i think trick saying it's up to interpretation is basically admitting EA had them dumb down the game anyway#if everything ab the rise and fall of the evanuris in game#was condensed to five 2min cutscenes it says enough that whatever the writers wanted#was swiftly cut down by corporate dept. basically saying it's in the fans' court now#also bc it's an easy cop out around new players & non solasmancers who are indifferent ab him / dislike him#as a way to appeal thru a more sympathetic lense of look!! he loved and was led astray#not to mention the clear justinia / leliana parallels#and leliana gets angry if you imply she was romantically involved / in love w justinia#and the romance descr when you remake your inq saying the dread wolf could not predict what it would mean to fall IN LOVE#implying he had never fallen in love before or at the very least experienced a romantic love#also him saying drinking from the well would make you a slave and he gets really upset#yet ive seen takes of ”hes doing this for her cus he dgaf ab lavellan” ?? he got mythal killed when he told her ab the blight#whatever feelings of admiration he had for her have rotted. he is literally burdened by his mistakes and his choice in joining her#i feel like if i were a spirit bound and twisted into a weapon i would need my creator to tell me i am Free. i would need that closure#like when cole says its not abuse to bind him if he asks and solas said thats not always true???#if you perceive her interaction w him in vg third act as#anything more than the way justinia released leliana in inq then im sorry maybe youre just obtuse#solavellan#mythal#dragon age meta
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shathann fucked up in so many ways with raising taash but she also makes me. so so SO sad. welcome back deeply flawed dragon age mother figures in various shades of 'well. I mean you tried. I guess' (from 'not at all' to 'I can see what you thought you were going for at least' as appropriate) we tango once more
#american masc rook's delivery of 'then why did you leave?' is so fucking good. felt that right down to my toes.#I personally find shathann much more sympathetic than leandra hawke because I do think she really is doing the very best she knew how#with the extremely limited resources and background she'd been given. learning a bit too late that raising a kid isn't an academic debate#where like. I think leandra frequently fails to do parenting stuff just as much because it's easier/more comfortable for her to not do it#and I find sheer emotional laziness being allowed to do that kind of harm just. infuriating!!!!!! maddening!!!#but I think this is uh. one of those that's probably going to depend on your own personal history and experiences big time haha.#no wrong way to feel about it just personal tender spots#caterina just fucking sucks tho she keeps burning these kids up basically for financial reasons lmao#(it's more complicated than that and I think she probably also *did* genuinely fear for their survival if she let them be 'soft'#I mean. how couldn't she be afraid after all that shit. but that does not make it better or less fucked up what she did. and keeps doing)#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#shathann#every time taash calls shathann 'tama' I curl up in physical pain for a while before I can be functional again
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thinking about how akio sees his younger self in utena and wondering if there's any fondness there. doesn't change the horror of what he does to her obviously but i do wonder
#akio and utena#m#long ramble in the tags sorry:#the thing about akio is that he's so evil bit he's also so human#he has feelings. i just don't know what they are (if anything) toward his victims#he loves anthy at the very least i'm sure of that. even if he hates her too. just like she loves and hates him. the lines are blurry.#and i just. i have to wonder whether any of that extends to utena at all. we know anthy at times feels similarly about utena and dios#(and akio by extension.) the simultanious love and resentment. so it's not too unlikely i think.#like. even though he never had anything but bad intentions in getting close to her#i'm not sure it's possible to do everything he did and feel nothing#not that he has any meaningful amount of guilt or remorse for it. i don't think that.#and i obviously don't think he “loved” her in any of the ways she might have thought he did#but did he not care at all? did he not feel any kind of fondness or sympathy or just. idk. pity? for her?#whatever the case it wasn't enough to reconsider having her killed so you know. how much does that actually matter anyway#idk. i think about it a lot. how abusers are rarely entirely indifferent toward their victims#the role he's playing in her life is so fucked up but it IS a role he's playing and i wonder how much he you know... internalizes it?#how much does he believe the illusion of family that he invites her into? because akio DOES often buy into his own illusions.#(similarly i think it's possible that akio is fond of touga too. their mentor-protégé relationship is horrible and abusive#but that doesn't make it less real. you know? maybe real is the wrong word.)#when he talks in episode 25 about wanting utena and anthy closer that's obviously so he can continue to groom her#but is there something genuine there too? i don't know.#again. it obviously does not make anything he does better or even different. but it is interesting to think about to me.#on the other side of that coin does seeing his own past youth and naivete and desire to do good that he (maybe) once had#reflected back at him through her mean anything?#is there resentment there? that she is what he couldn't be? or more likely he just thinks that idealism is stupid.#either way it's something he wants to take from her. anyway ramble over.#i talk a lot about utena's feelings toward akio (familial vs romantic love and the way the two are intertwined in fucked up ways)#but not much the other way around. probably because utena is actually a sympathetic character whose feelings the show very clearly#wants you to analyze and think about.#which is... less true for akio i think. though he's still a complex character with complex motives. he's just harder to get a grasp on.
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this has to be some imagined collective psychoses to believe it was fine to be indirectly (?) racist because people in your inbox was racist? the comparison and context of using chimpanzees is clear regardless of what you felt. and the people harassing her were not the people making very sympathetic posts asking to not be anti black and again the rot in some of your brains is inoperable because calling this out does not mean someone is a “hiterlite” like please spend your time off tumblr like why do you keep mentioning shes from the fucking global south no one cares. antiblackness isnt suddenly palatable because some woman from korea does it
Silly me, as a non-black person I thought a pretty fucking easy rule of thumb about antiblackness is "listen to black people," but Tumblr is very, very committed to showing me that that's apparently not easy at all for quite a lot of people
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one day we will talk about how tennis fans talk about/treat players they find attractive versus players they dont…………
#and sorry but. a lot of you do this!#im sure i do it as well#but sometimes it’s just feels like…idk really obvious that that’s what’s happening#idk it pisses me off. but especially with the wta it feels reductive sometimes to call it out#like ‘oh you’re only supporting her bc she’s pretty’ like EWWW. what a nasty thing to say#BUT i do think it’s true sometimes!!!!#not that people only support players they think are pretty#but that people are far more sympathetic or that they’re more likely to get behind a player they aren’t *usually* a fan of#does this make sense?#and i think it extends to the atp as well but partially less obvious bc ppl let men get away with anything anyway lol#lowkey it feels mean to talk about because any comparisons i make have to insinuate someone’s attractiveness…#but like it really feels like the elephant in the room sometimes…like how do you not see what you’re doing here#and can i be real! i think karo is a massive beneficiary of this!#and i think that’s part of why i notice it so much because i notice the way people talk about her and support her (which of course i love)#but then i compare that with other players who have had similar stories…and i feel like i do have the perspective here—#because i see so much of what is said about karo#so it feels quite obvious when she’s honestly? treated *very* well considering her career#we’ve seen plenty of players who have injury issues who are just labeled inconsistent or as having ‘physical issues’#i think karo gets a lot of sympathy in comparison…and id even go so far as to say i think she’s overhyped sometimes!#which i know is a wild thing to say as a huge fan of hers but i think it’s true! idk. this is not really the point but im trying to explain#what i meant by the earlier tags. that some players who are seen as attractive are given way more leniency in general
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molten/molted/molded
also yes i do actually have a flamingo mug thats sorta chipped, and it is a little ugly, here it is :
its not super chipped, but i was still devastated when i found out
#HI. WILL YOU GUYS LET ME POST PRETENTIOUS POETRY#idk i was just thinking about how im doing a lot better than before and. being sympathetic to the zoned-out escapism i did to survive then#im not that person anymore and feels weird to be in her body? but im glad shes passed away#i dont knowwwww. it feels like im a lizard shedding my skin every year and occasionally ill look at my old molts and be like wow#i used to fit in that thing. i used BE that thing. but now im not#dont take this too seriously i mean its not a vent its just me thinkin about how im doing great and little louie was not HAHAHA#im really proud of this actually i like how the glass effect came out and i like the colors and the poem.... i cooked !!!#this is also practice for lineless/painted art and its not too bad for a beginner#anyways. i like poetry and more ppl should make it casually this is poetry propaganda#uhhh what do i tag this as#poetry#art#artists on tumblr#????? i never know how to tag non-fandom art#anyways thats it :]
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admittedly we do not know anything abt most of the new characters yet and assuming she's not in LoL that includes Maddie but it is... a lil odd to see infantilization of her at this stage.
I get she seems like a ray of sunshine character so far but "girl has no idea what martial law means 💔" kind of jokes are making me think abt how if maddie IS just a naive enforcer thinking she's doing good for piltover, she'd still... know what martial law and fascism etc entail. She'd just think those things are Good and Just!
Idk not to take jokes too seriously but there's something interesting abt what makes a character complicit in horrors esp when they seem so nice, and I feel like that's kinda being brushed aside w the interpretations that she is just an oblivious kid... esp since those jokes are about the scene where she's supporting Cait's dictatorship promotion which is after she's literally been in Zaun with her gassing people lmao.
She knows what's going on. Her framing of it is just extremely biased. Maybe a bit naive of her if so, but not stupid yknow.
#Arcane tag#I have complicated thoughts on the whole 'any portrayal of a fictional cop is copaganda#and people who like fictional cops are irl police brutality sympathizers' stuff this site does#bc i think people can like a character or a show And be cognizant of how it differs from the real world#AND a show as politically charged as arcane lends itself to some interesting takes#where you can see how a person might also think about irl situations based on what they fall for in the show#Ie people can love maddie or Cait or any other character who does awful shit#without that appreciation of them being an excusal of their actions#(Like. I love jinx and ambessa lmao)#And sometimes defenses of a character are necessary when fandom is disproportionately hard#on that character and the people who like them#It's just also like... you don't need to excuse or explain away why a character is Good actually#They can be sympathetic! Definitely! But they're still committing atrocities and that's fine#They're fictional and it's better to embrace what's being put down imo#Doesn't mean you support any of that irl so you don't need to explain why it's actually#not bad behavior you can just go 'yeah my blorbo fucks up a lot'#bc otherwise if ur looking at a character doing awful things and going 'But#they had no idea what they were doing 🥺' it's... odd to me!#Maybe some of them don't#Like powder didn't mean to blow up her loved ones#But maddie means to help ensure peace however it's deemed necessary#Maybe she doesn't see zaunites as people and therefore justifies it#But.... she knows what she's signing up for even if her framing is off#At least that's how it comes off to me. She's barely spoken so I could be off base ig
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"Oh, that's true. You humans can't read memories, unlike Hiro. Which is good in a way, because everyone would be a god in the human world~." something said this with a little sympathy, but it seemed to be mocking. A black figure appeared next to him, glowing red, it resembled a middle-aged woman, approximately close to Andras' age. Hiro? began to approach the silhouette:
"The one you saved from being robbed. The one who fell in love with you ~ And the one who eventually became your wife. ~ I meant her." The silhouette said and the smile on its face changed to a sympathetic face. He took the black figure's hand and turned it to Andras' face, quite gently. The black silhouette had already acquired more developed features, the body began to resemble Cheryl, before Andras was arrested.
"Poor, innocent soul~ She suffered when she found out what you did~" Hiro? said and Cheryl's silhouette changed to a more demanding one, she sat on her knees, lowering her head. Hiro? began to carefully approach the woman.
"Hair, like a broken nest. A thin body, like a skeleton will jump out of her." The silhouette said this with sympathy and slight drama, as if in a play and visually carefully stroking the woman's hair at the same time carefully touching the woman's right hand with his left hand. As if he was trying to hold her back. She raised her head and showed her face and neck: a mark from a rope. Tired eyes, as if she had lost the meaning of life, bags under her eyes:
"She thought she had found a way out. She decided that the rope would help her fly to the sky, and she almost flew. But... you will call it a miracle, and she will call it a punishment that she survived. She lost what she lived for, and did not understand why she was still here. She found out what you tried to do and what you did. And she lost the sparkle in her eyes after the terrible confessions." After these words, Hiro? dropped to his right knee, he carefully took her face in his right palm, as if he was trying to console her and turned Cheryl's face towards himself.
"Poor soul, the kindest and sweetest in the world, suffered from this darkness. Death was near, and she wanted to escape from the cruel pain."
After this monologue, Hiro? turned to Andras with a sad look, but his sympathy was more for Cheryl than for Andras.
"Answer: would you let death take her or would you let yourself fall into the hands of death, but save this soul?"
This dream was cold, cold as ice. It even seemed much colder than ice. You can compare it to the Arctic, but this place was colder than the Arctic. It was lonely, until a certain time...
"Wow, what an "icy" welcome. You clearly put some effort into it." Suddenly, a silhouette with a male voice approached you: his skin was pure white, like an albino. Rather, the color resembled pure snow. Gray hair, the right eye, no, the right half of the face and neck were covered by bangs, and the rest of the hair was long, except for the left front part. But surprisingly, the clothes were dark shades of blue and red. A brown cloak, like superheroes from children's cartoons or books, on the right hand a bright red glove. The shoes were even above the knees, surprisingly dark gray and light red-pink fasteners on the shoes. There was a smile on his face, and the left eye was temporarily closed. The height was surprisingly not small (It reached Roy's elbow, maybe even a little higher than the elbow, but not Roy's full height.)
"You surprise me....Under such conditions, and at such an age, to hold on to your strength in such cold....you are not afraid of the cold to such an extent that you are ready to freeze to death, right? I mean, no one can live long in such cold, can they?"
After these words, the silhouette opened its left eye: a gray iris, slightly darker than the hair and a black four-pointed star as a pupil, in the iris itself there was no hint of shine, but there was no darkening either. The silhouette's eye was open as if it was mocking you, although the smile did not show it. It was like a smile of curiosity, but the eye did not show curiosity. They began to wait for your answer.
(If anything, note this account: @annrps It will be me, just on a different account.)
A cold cell he laid in, months after his arrest. Not one of a comfortable one in the matter of facts, a retired teacher laid in a scruffy bed. Dreams were not easy to catch on, as his rest was rather limited.
But, alas, the blackhole finds himself in an place like the arctic, freezing against his skin. Andras huffs out an air of frost, crossing his arms for warmth.
The hell..?
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[Henry] had asked Lady Shelton whether Mary [was] persisting in her obstinancy. Hearing that she was, Henry became certain that she was being encouraged by secret communication from Katharine. Lady Shelton thought the only possible messenger was Mary's chamber woman. In this she was correct. The maid had been smuggling letters in and out. She was dismissed, as was Mary's confessor, to be replaced by one whom Chapuys characterised as 'Lutheran'.
The King’s Pearl: Henry VIII & His Daughter Mary, Melita Thomas
#as i'm going through this refresher in tandem with reading weir's new novel...#she actually writes shelton as being the one that managed to get her mother's letters to her into her hands#even for fiction that feels...far fetched#ostensibly someone had to be getting her letters from chapuys as well; even chapuys reports at times#that he doesn't know how it's possible she's getting letters out to him#but i doubt it was either of the boleyn aunts here#nor margaret bryan; anne's maternal aunt#even the interpretation that anne was a nonentity by this point and had no clout; basically#would not bear this out; if they didn't fear anne then they certainly would've had reason to fear henry#and i doubt they would've circumvented what he ordered#until after jan 1536 (where shelton is allowing visitors from chapuys bcus she's been sent gifts) this just does not seem to be the case#melita thomas#(also had weir been more faithful to primary sources. then this interpretation would mean shelton threw this chamber woman under#the bus...which she did; but in her rendering it would be to save her OWN skin#rather than at great personal risk which is what she#portrays; for the construction a sympathetic character in lady shelton)#i also think there's a question of agency on this unnamed maid's part that i don't really ever seen given space...#insofar as the hierarchy of privilege etc#was she actually willing to risk her income to do this? that's generally how it's portrayed#but it's just as possible that she felt constrained to do so bcus mary; despite her demoted status; was obviously her superior#even if not her employer#not to mention after being dismissed for such a reason; it's not like she was going to get a reccomendation to another household#it's fair to talk about how both coa and mary were placed in these hostile environments but the hostility and tension#those placed as their servants (not those that had chosen to be there; like elizabeth darrell for coa)#is again...not given the same space; generally#it was probably very frustrating to serve two highly privileged women that refused to answer or look at or acknowledge them#because they were addressing them as the law required.#you can imagine the eye-rolls of the servants which coa called 'gaolers'. since. yk.#a person of a servant's status was likely to have a friend or relative that spent time in an *actual* jail cell. if not themselves .
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u kno what really sucks
when self proclaimed toxic friend (friend A) catches wind of a conversation you had with another person (friend B). in which B says A is "kinda toxic".
A then comes to you upset about it. and asks why you didn't defend them.
there's no kind way to say "bc they right"
#girl you have literally been BLOCKED by FRIENDS for toxic behaviour#we have told you TO YOUR FACE to stop doing toxic shit and you just keep going because you think it's funny#“I know I joke about being toxic all the time but it's not like it's true!”#it literally is you may not be toxic to your friends but we see what you do/say to/about randos??#she's the kind of person to teabag people in pvp and start arguments in df#but I know I can't say she IS toxic because she'll just brush it off like everything else I say to her :)#“I can't believe you'd talk about that to group B instead of coming to me :(”#I d i d#and you brushed me off saying “noooo it's not like that!!!! they're super nice I promise!!!!! they didn't mean it!!!!!”#I like to talk to group B about this shit because they actually validate my feelings instead of just telling me what I think is wrong#if it's not how she sees it doesn't count#I may be autistic as fuck but even I know things aren't black and white. everyone is going to see a situation from a different perspective#you can disagree with the perspective you're being told and still be sympathetic/work towards a solution
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ok heres the first quarter of it
Dissociative amnesia.
That’s what his therapist had said. Dissociative amnesia. Something about complex ptsd and adaptive survival methods.
It had taken years for Timmy Turner to eventually agree to seeing a therapist at all. There had been a lot more stigma around the idea back in the day— that it was something only crazy people needed to do. And he wasn’t crazy, he just…
Dissociative amnesia.
Derealization.
Complex PTSD.
There were all these new buzzwords in his head. They were supposed to mean something, supposed to mean that there was hope for him to get better, to feel… different from the way the last twenty years had felt.
“And how have the last twenty years felt, Tim?”
His therapist, a younger-than-him blonde woman, fresh out of college. She always liked using his name, and she always had this… oddly casual way about her. She was the fifth therapist he had tried talking to, and honestly, it was going better than it had gone with any of the quacks he had seen before her.
“Like… It’s… y’know the feeling when you’re watching a movie, and you recognize an actor, but you can't remember his name? Like, you know you’ve seen the guy before, but you can’t put… words to it. And no matter how hard you try to focus, it feels like it keeps getting further away?”
He made illustrative hand gestures, unable to look her in the eye as he rambled.
“I’m… familiar,” she nodded. “Yeah, definitely.”
“It’s kinda like that, but— but that’s what it feels like whenever I try to think about where my life is supposed to be going. What I’m supposed to be doing,” Tim gestured vaguely. “Like there’s this big piece of everything that I can’t quite…”
He sighed, leaning back on the sofa. As much as he liked her as a therapist, her office layout was awkward. She would sit at her desk with her back to the laptop placed on top of it, facing towards the sofa. It made everything feel… lopsided.
“That makes sense,” she nodded, resting her elbows on her knees as she leaned forward. “You went through a lot of traumatic stuff as a kid. A lot of the time, when we spend so long in survival mode, once we get out of those situations it feels like you either need to keep being in fight-or-flight, or you end up kind of… listless.”
“Listless,” Timmy nodded. “That’s one way to put it, yeah.”
“Do you ever feel like… the opposite of that?” She tilted her head at him. “Like you know exactly what you want, and exactly how to get it.”
Timmy opened his mouth like he was about to say something, but then it just… fizzled out. “I—... I don’t�� know.”
“What did you do as a kid that made you feel better when you felt out of place? I know your parents weren’t really an option.”
He tried to remember. He really, honestly did. There was that almost-memory sensation again, and then it was like it was swallowed up into the darkest corner of his mind.
Whenever he thought about this stuff, his head always went kind of… echoey.
The synapses just wouldn’t connect, like a cord had been severed. Like he was going to sneeze but his body wouldn’t let him. Like his vision wouldn’t adjust.
The silence was deafening. The absence of the memories that should have been there felt larger than anything real that he had left.
“I’d… hang out with my friends? But then something… happened. I don’t know. I stopped seeing them, stopped hanging out with them. I guess it happened around the time I started 5th grade… A couple new kids joined my class halfway through the semester and…”
No, that wasn’t right. Was it?
“You don’t have to remember all the details,” his therapist assured him, giving him a genuinely sympathetic smile. “What about now? Do you have any friends you can hang out with that might be able to give you some ideas?”
—
Remy Buxaplenty was doing pretty well, all things considered. His parents passed away and left him… everything. And he hadn’t run the family name into the ground yet, so that was nice.
does anybody wanna read my work in progress fairly oddparents fanfiction. its G rated and gen and about timmy coping with his lost memory as a 35 year old in therapy.
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any time coriolanus snow does anything
#he annoys me#he really does annoy me#you ever see those posts of people who get high and have moral epiphanies like 'why are there homeless people'#that's him when he's chilled out#he became so sleep deprived once that his conscience made a reappearance and he verbally understood why the districts hate him#but then dr gaul sends him into the arena and takes him back to her creepy experimentation lab for medical treatment#and she gives him some kind of drug that somehow makes his senses *sharper*#like NO#STOP THAT#that's the OPPOSITE of what we want#we want him to CHILL OUT#he's so annoying. he's SO annoying. the complete lack of effort to become better is so INFURIATING because the potential *IS* there#he's starving and abandoned by the capitol he's surrounded by people sympathetic towards the districts he LIVES in district 12#he has every reason to change his mind#and he still won't budge! it's the worst! HE is the worst!!!#you're all lucky i don't usually go for tragedies because I'd never shut up#what do you mean i knew the ending going in so i shouldn't be mad about it. that's even more reason to be mad#why don't YOU look at the potential for an unlived future and try not to be mad#<- that's why he's so obsessed with katniss. he told me himself#mirrors and reflections and lies and truths and choices and circumstances and so on#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#the hunger games
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