#and then im not even like. spending without caring im LOOKING FOR SALES MAN

[skeletons-in-ur-closet]

HOWWWW HAVE I SPENT 500 THIS MONTH ALREADY

[guiltycorp]

Playing Genshin for a couple of weeks now and I have some thoughts about Mondstadt, its seeming prosperity, and criminal elements!! Also dunking on Diluc a little bit lol. I'm not even going to touch hilichurls, they're probably the one issue I expect the game to come back to in time! They seem to be an intelligent race that was cursed and so we might get some sad backstory and realize that we've been assholes to them, not 100% sure but hopefully. Other than hilichurls and the Fatui (and yeahhh so fun to make russians into villains, im guessing it's for attracting the american audience or something... at least the characters are interesting enough), there are also Treasure Hoarders, who in the archive are mainly described as workers who lost their jobs or some other manner of poor people who turned to looting and crime out of desperation. And yet the angle is that 'thieving is always morally wrong'. Somebody didn't read Les Mis, I guess! Another note, there seems to be a weird gameplay and story segregation where we as the Traveler do lots of looting and treasure hunting ourselves only to be commended for it. But I digress. My actual point is that interestingly enough those elements of worldbuilding come together pretty well when you look at the city itself!   In Mondstadt it is most difficult to become a small business owner, made all the more obvious when compared to Liyue's wealth of shops, services, and traveling traders (Liyue has its own baggage of problems which tbh seem more serious to me but that's another topic). It's just not the most profitable occupation! Almost everyone we see out on the streets does their own resource supply, production, and service. Naturally, this means that those people don't earn enough to hire their own workers. In turn, that means that there are no jobs to be found in those places. So, where are all the jobs? For that we have the Dawn Winery, the Knights of Favonius, and the option to leave for Springvale to become a hunter or go to a different country altogether. The winery is described as the city's most powerful industry both for local consumption and export, but how does it actually treat its workers? Well, for example there's Patton who accidentally broke a bottle of expensive wine and is now basically an indentured servant to Diluc. He says that even if he worked without any breaks he still would need 48 years to pay off his debt. We can meet his daughter near Venti's statue who has to play by herself because her father is always working. Does that really seem like freedom to you? There's also Guy's father who works at the winery itself and can't afford to rest even when he is heavily sick and old. These are the worst examples for sure but others also have their own smaller problems like Charles who confides in us that he often feels tired and only takes nights off when Diluc is in a mood to tend the bar himself etc.  It is kind of telling that we don't have the option of engaging with their problems and we can't really talk to Diluc about it either. For all that he defends the city each night, he shows no interest in defending his own workers from his business's predatory tactics. To say nothing of the great damage he does to the adult populace of the city, always supplying alcohol and tempting people with deals and sales when there are already too many drunkards even among the named characters. When the opposing tavern (which also only has Diona for a bartender even when her own father has alcohol dependence) chose to present a non-alcoholic beverage during the holiday Angel’s Share doubled down on alcohol. And it doesn't even have snacks? This one bit was probably just for joke purposes, but tbh it's pretty dangerous to drink without any snacks at all, it makes sense why people get so heavily drunk in the first place. Note that Diluc himself doesn’t drink, showing good judgment when it comes to himself. Meanwhile the only person Diluc seemingly has no problem cutting off is Kaeya and it’s not obvious whether that’s out of concern or pettiness. Nobody is cutting off Nimrod who is ruined by his addiction! Now this is probably the core reason why Nimrod turned to crime, and I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that he and his wife are dependant on Kaeya who at the very least knows to appreciate his informants. Kaeya himself is also a gleeful enabler, by the way, which makes sense considering his uh.. everything. And his upbringing at the Dawn Winery didn’t hurt, no surprise why he’s so keen on wine himself. He might be shrewd and oh so clever when it comes to getting information in taverns, but his story details and voice lines confirm that there actually is a problem even if we don’t know the full scope of it.  Now, the Knights of Favonius? Aside from being corrupt in the past they happen to hire minors (we can read that in their handbook) whom they don't even pay. What's that, free labor for the simplest of tasks? Makes sense why some of the adult knights laze about if all the work gets done by minors or the more focused and accomplished senior knights with Visions. That's a wonky structure for sure. Guy tells us that he became a squire at 16 and still has the boring job of guarding the back gates despite repeatedly showing signs of great dissatisfaction. I wouldn't be surprised if he betrays us later or something, honestly. Maybe Kaeya is preparing him for double agent work, who knows. Right now he has no opportunities for climbing the career ladder to take better care of his sick father, stuck in a pointless job for months. And that's a talented and focused young man! what about regular folk? Well. In the end, regular people have several options. They can give up and overwork themselves while spending nights looking for coins in the wishing fountain to try and scrape enough for their sister’s medicine. They can go to the Adventurers' Guild which has highly dangerous commissions with the most profitable ones taken on by Fischl and other professionals, hardly a dependant job for a regular person. There’s also Church which we know very little about. Likely it's dependant on taxes and donations and it’s the one organization that cares about the orphans of the city (no, keeping Klee in solitary doesn’t count as caring, Knights of Favonius!). There’s Springvale for hunters, farmers and chefs, a difficult lifestyle to maintain when the hunting grounds are in one of the Four Winds’ domains with strangely intelligent wolves.  And then there’s the other more accessible and obvious option! You guessed it, it’s crime!!  And there it is, the reason why there's such a big problem with bandits and overworked people in Mondstadt :)  Honestly after writing all that down, if I were to RP a normal person in Mondstadt I’d try to get into the Treasure Hoarders guild at like 5 years old I think. Better than standing around watching random people kill my pigeons anyway. Tbh this is less of a 'makes you think huh!!' take and more of a commendation towards the writers of the game. They obviously have a more conservative outlook if they're so keen on condemning the thieves who have to steal in order to survive, but the world itself makes a lot of sense. It makes the game a lot of fun to explore.

[tartagliaxx]

hi lei!! my break has officially started so i don't have to stress about school for a bit!! today i played through venti's and childe's story quest to help decide which one i wanna use my pity on and honestly i was more affected by childe's than i thought,,hes starting to form a place in my heart the whole thing made me kinda cringe and have second hand embarssment because of his lying but seeing how much he cared for his brother was so sweet,,,i have a complicated relationship with my family and seeing their dynamic made me feel a sense of yearning i guess,,i cried it about it earlier and childe provided me a sense of comfort but I wanna know more about him before i just let him be my comfort character there are requirements and rules he has to meet!! giving me comfort is a full time job!!/j i'm gonna read his wiki tonight and i'm respectfully asking you my favorite childe lover for your hcs on him- 🍰

hello bby!!! i just woke up from a nap so this may or may not have come late. anw, im glad you’re finally getting a break! venti and childe’s quests gave me different sets of feelings but those two are my favorite along w zhongli’s! childe does a lot of unjustifiable things and he’s overall, a pretty bad person but the thing about bad people is that they’re never 100% bad. there’s always some semblance of good in their hearts and that makes you connect to them in a sense. while i don’t exactly agree w his methods, childe loves his brother sm and it shows. i want someone to protect me the same way he does w his family smh.

random childe hcs under the cut!

— childe sleeps awkwardly w his useless long limbs sprawled out so there’s never enough space when sharing a bed w him.

— thats a win for him tho bc he’s the hugest cuddler teyvat has seen. without fail, whoever sleeping w him would wake up to his arm securely around their waist or their head, legs tangled loosely together.

— he sleeps the closest to the door and windows. its a safety habit of his. whoever wants to harm the people he’s closest to will have to go through him first and that’s a fact even under the blanket of slumber.

— he likes spending obnoxious amounts of money for gifts but he also makes handmade trinkets just as often. maybe woodwork? little toys or trinkets that he makes on his downtime. those trinkets always come with special little notes or letters, depending on how much free time he has.

— what i mean is it ranges from “thinking of you. love, ajax” to “the weather in liyue is cooler than normal but not nearly cold enough to compare to the weather over there. i just came back from work related duties and while camping, i made this little something for you.”

— if someone he cares about gets injured because of their clumsiness, he would tease them first before helping them. he’s a jerk but that doesn’t mean he isn’t concerned. actually, he’s the type to blow things out of proportion.

— you sprained your ankle? he’ll laugh and tease you for being so clumsy and when you start pouting and refusing his help? he’s the type to leave you behind and come back a few moments later with a wheelchair or smth as you sulk about his lack of concern. if you still refuse his help? he’ll ride the wheelchair himself and spin around acting as if he’s having the best time of his life (he is.)

— also, watch him carry you in his arms everywhere despite your embarrassment and insistence that you can walk hobble your way around.

— if someone hurt you? call an ambulance but not for him that’s a story for another time and it’s not gonna be sparkles and fairy tales.

— childe has a very high eq/emotional intelligence. partnered w his very observant nature, he knows exactly what everyone is feeling.

— expect your favorite comfort food, a bunch of comfy blankets, a mug of your favorite warm drink and all other stuff you like if you’re feeling even the slightest bit down. he’ll spoil you w everything if he’s unfortunately too busy to be there w you.

— but if he can force someone else to do his share of work and his work is not too important, then he would stay and cuddle you all day. one moment you’re laying against his chest as you read a book and the next, you’re the little spoon in bed as he peppers you w sweet words and kisses. he won’t force you to talk abt it but he will willingly lend an ear if you want to talk about it.

— if he sees that whatever troubles you is becoming bad-bad then he will gently pry it out of you for your own sake. he just wants to help as best as he could bc a frown would never belong to your pretty face.

— pls i want that. but you know what else i want?

— when childe is the one needing help, his first instinct is to hide behind a mask but if you successfully wormed your way into his heart, he’ll let you see how lonely and broken he truly is.

— cradle his head to your chest and he’ll nuzzle his head closer to you. he loves the rhythm of your heartbeat. it grounds him. run a hand through his hair and he’ll weakly whimper. don’t mention it tho or else he’ll pull away out of shame.

— after basking in your warmth and affection, childe will look up w a dopey smile and the most lovestricken eyes you could ever see. he loves too much and now, he loves you.

— he’s very open w his affection and if you reciprocate? he will protect you until the end of time and love you ever so unconditionally.

— to childe, love means one thing and that’s family. if he loves you, you’re now part of his dysfunctional family and he makes it his life’s purpose to do everything to make his family smile.

— congrats. you’re now part of tonia’s permanent guest list for tea parties and teucer’s favorite play buddy second only to childe. sure you may never have met them, but he speaks about you so much in his letters that they feel like they’ve known you forever.

— oh and you might as well pack up and live in snezhnaya bc after meeting them once at childe’s insistence, they, too, have fallen in love w you and they’re just as stubborn as our man, childe.

* * *

not sure what kind of hcs u wanted so i added a little of everything. this is my best sales talk so bby, come into my arms and join the ‘i love childe’ cult.

[inupibaldspot]

Savior : Chapter 10

"Stop! What's that?" The man who had a rifle in his hand asked.

Currently the team were in Grey Terminal. This started when they were talking about food and suddenly Ace started talking about the food they get inside the gate beyond Grey Terminal.

Now they were all staked up, wearing a cloak dragging a covered dead crocodile as a way to get through the inspection and inside their desired place.

"It's crocodile leather for sale." Ace said. He then removed the cloth on the crocodile to prove his statement.

The gate keeper flinched back in surprise. "Go ahead." He said.

After that they were able to go inside but as soon as they entered Emilia noted that a rather large amount of people were surrounding the entrance. Obviously thieves that were trying to rob the goods.

"It seems that you're carrying a valuable thing there." One of the men carrying a stick said. "How about you leave it here."

Other men also started surrounding them while laughing.The man who first talked to them boldly approached them. "Oi! Say something."

"Shut up, you small fry." Ace said without hesitation. Luffy who was at the bottom  of the pile then swung his iron pipe, (which male trio were carrying)making the man fall.

"Before you rob..." Ace started as he pulled the cloak revealing themselves. "You should choose your targets wisely."

After revealing themselves, the thieves immediately recognised them and took a step back.The children without hesitation jumped and started attacking.

Emilia was the only one without the iron pipe.She rather wanted to see how strong her armament haki was.

Emilia punched the guy in front of her without a second thought. This made the guy being thrown  near by, making a hole on the wall .

Emilia sweat dropped mentally noteing to not use it against normal people. After not even 5 minutes of fighting, they had beaten all the guys and started dressing up again.

.........

Emilia stared at the shop keeper in front of her currently out of their disguise. "Huh? 20,000 Beli? Uncle, you can clearly see that this one is pure leather."

"Yes. That is why I'm buying it for 20,000. It's a rather great deal of you ask me." The shop keeper said trying to trick the small girl.

"I'm pretty sure this won't be any less than 60,000 Beli and I offered that for 50,000." Emilia said crossing her hands not budging.

Ace,Sabo and Luffy had no idea how to do this stuff and left it entirely on Emilia.At first they were happy that they could sell it for 20,000 but when Emilia mentioned the real cost, they couldn't be more happy to have her who knows the values of stuff since she does a lot of reading.

"I see..." Emilia sighed.

The shop keeper smiled. Even though she know the cost of her products , she is nothing more than a child after all.

"I guess I'll sell it in another shop." Emilia said turning back. "Let's go, you guys."

"W-wait!" The shop keeper said. "I....I'll buy it."

Emilia smiled.

..........

"They paid us a good price for the crocodile ." Sabo said. "More money for our pirate savings."

"Yeah!" Ace agreed in a low tone since they were still in disguise. "Thanks Emilia."

"I was quite nervous since it was my first time negotiating." Emilia said.

"I'm hungry." Luffy who was at the very bottom, complained.

"Just wait." Ace replied. "You'll get to eat some delicious ramen soon."

"Ramen? What's that?" Sabo questioned. "Is it that delicious."

"I don't care,let's hurry up and eat." Luffy said.

Soon they came in front of a rather large building and entered it.

"Welcome." The man,probably the chef greeted but stopped them after seeing their unpleasant  appearance. "W-wait, you can't come in our restaurant!"

Sabo then showed a golden circular thing and said. "I want a private room."

After that the man jumped back and bowed, quickly showing them their room.

"Four bowls of Ramen! Sorry for the wait." The waitress greeted and then left.

"So this is ramen?" Sabo asked quickly followed by "It looks delicious" by Luffy.

Emilia eyes also glowed as she stared at the food in front of her.She never tasted ramen after coming to this world after all.

All of them started eating and soon finished and again ordered.Emilia was full from her second plate and didn't eat from them on.

"Emilia you're not eating anymore?" Ace asked.

"No...I'm full." Emilia replied.She really wonder how did these boys eat so much and was still so skinny.

"Then can I have your share?" Luffy asked as he ate.

" Go ahead."

They kept on ordering again and again that Emilia had started feeling bad for the staff.

"Excuse me." The waitress knocked bringing new set of bowls. But then Luffy who was distracted stretched his hand and reached out for the bowl making the waitress squeal in horror .

"Oh..." Emilia who witnessed the scene smiled. "We should go now that our cover is blown."

"Wait let me eat some more." Luffy said as he continued eating.

Not even a minute later the door opened . "Sir,please explain..."

"Run!" Sabo said as all of them rushed towards the window, breaking it and then jumped.

"The ramen was delicious." Sabo said as he was falling.

"I told you." Ace replied.

"I should try making it as well." Emilia said.

"I can't wait!" Luffy exclaimed.

You can imagine how other people saw this scene where children who were falling were talking mid-air calmly.

They then safely landed and started bolting.

"Stop! Some one catch them!" One of the sheriffs who spotted them shouted.

"Is that you,Sabo?! Wait!" One of the man who they ran pass by started shouting. "You were alive!"

Sabo stopped and looked back along with Emilia,Ace and Luffy.

"Sabo,that man's calling for you!" Ace said.

"Who is that?" Luffy questioned.

Emilia then realised who that man and where Sabo was from.She put all the pieces in place from when Sabo talked about nobles,certain time which showed Sabo was well educated, had a noble's belonging and now a man was calling out for him.However she didn't comment.

"He must be mistaken.Lets go"

......

They were currently back in the forest and as soon as they reached a safe distance Ace and Luffy started interrogating Sabo.

"What..Im not hiding anything." Sabo said, as he was backed in a corner.

"Really?" Luffy said,oblivious already believing him.

"It's obvious he is hiding something!" Ace shouted. "Are you really keeping going to keep a secret from us?!"

"I told you already...I'm not hiding anything." Sabo looked away clearly a sign of lying.

"Talk already or I'll make you talk."Ace and Luffy grabbed Sabo and then started 'a forceful interrogration'.

"Sabo." Emilia called out making the boys stop fighting momentarily. "It's fine to reveal it. I'm sure they'll understand."

"Emilia, you already knew about it?!" Luffy questioned.

"No.I just found it out myself in the town." Emilia quickly denied.

Sabo then nodded and started explaining his story.

"Ehhhh?! A noble's son." Ace and Luffy questioned in unison. "....who is?"

"Me!!!" Sabo shouted.

Ace and Luffy then shoved their pinky finger deep in their nose. "So?"

"You guys were the ones who asked it." Emilia said, sweat dropping at the scene suddenly remembering Garp. Seriously this family....

"I'm not an orphan and both my parents are alive." Sabo explained. "And the man who we saw today is my father."

The other trio just stared quietly waiting for the blond haired boy to continue. "I'm sorry for lying to you." Sabo apologised looking down.

"You apologied so I forgive  you." Luffy said crossing his arms. Emilia looked at Luffy smiling. This child is always so pure, always giving out love attracting people to him along the way.

"Honesty I'm shocked " Ace said turning his back and facing the sea "Why would you do this if you're a noble's son?"

"I ran away from home...." Sabo started remembering his childhood memories when he was with his parents "...because they only care about money and status but not me. I had to study all day since if I am unable to marry a girl from a royal family, I'll be considered  crap."

Emilia stared at the boy in front of her. She had been lucky to be born into a loving family so she can't completely understand Sabo but then she can't help but feel saddened for him.

"For that family I was a nuisance.Sorry if I offend you, but even though I had parents I felt lonely!" Sabo shouted. "People in Grey Terminal were not like the nobles ,but for me I liked it better there."

"I see...Now I understand." Ace stated.

Sabo then stood up now smiling. "We'll definitely set sail and leave this country. I wanna know this world and then write a book on my adventures!"

"I don't mind studying navigation. I'll be stronger and then become a pirate!" Sabo shouted arms in the air. This caused all of them to smile.

" I know, you don't have to tell me that." Ace started "I'll become a pirate and keep on fighting, until I'm the most famous! That's the way I'll prove my existence. "

"I don't care if those bastards don't acknowledge my existence or how much they hate me...I'll  become a great pirate and I'll face them." Ace shouted with determination in his eyes. " I won't run away from anyone, I won't lose against anyone neither will  I be afraid of anyone. Everyone will know my name!"

When Ace said these words a wave of emotion rushed through Emilia. She didn't know how to describe it. She felt proud at the same time she felt un easy. But one thing sure was that she really wanted to see Ace grow more.Staying with him and the others made her really attached to them.

This world at first was just a fiction but now this has become a reality. And all the times they have spend together is real.

Luffy who was next to her, laughed and then rushed forward. "I'll find One Piece and then become the Pirate King!!!"

"Huh?!" Both Ace and Sabo exclaimed as Luffy just laughed.

"I have no idea what your saying...You just talk nonsense" Ace said scratching his head while Sabo just laughed.

Emilia then walked forward and looked at the sea.

"My dream is..." She started talking as she turned and  faces them. " to make sure you guys keep your promises and do my best to support them."

The boys all had a questioning face but soon started fighting about who will be the captain (again ) as Emilia looked at them with a smile.

She really was happy.

[ifyourelostiamtoo]

Intellectual negotiations

Prompt: Hermione proposes to Tom, and Tom says yes.

PSA: This is a dialogue writing exercise.

Hermione: Riddle!

Tom: No.

Hermione: You’re not betrothed to any woman that I know of.

Tom: True, the prospect of settling down does not interest me in the very slightest. And I daresay you feel the same?

Hermione: The Ministry seems to value success of any kind. Society benefits from marriages in a manner that no other relationship does. Thriving partnerships between individuals imply they possess certain attractive traits such as conscientiousness, conformity, self-discipline, extraversion, trustworthiness, among others. With these in mind, I’m not opposed to one, no.

Tom: Imply they possess. Whatever spurred this on? Ms. Brown’s engagement to your red-haired knight in shining armour?

Hermione: I need your help in securing a lifelong partner.

Tom (chuckles): You must be at your wit’s end to ask for assistance. Well… I’m quite, shall we say, indisposed as of the moment. Give yourself a year, I’m positive the second you witness your friend, red-eyed with snot dribbling down her nose, rushing to your side after a trivial marital dispute will you see the light. Marriages are pathetic spectacles of dramatic actions.

Hermione: But you swore to take care of your older sister!

Tom: I haven’t forgotten my bloody promise, Hermione. I can arrange a few suitors to your liking after I’m finished with my latest endeavour. So if you are contemplating offing yourself tonight, I suggest you postpone it.

Hermione: And if I find them severely lacking?

Tom: I’m sure you will. A friendly reminder that your sanctimonious tendencies’ only accomplishment is scaring off men of sound minds and able bodies. You’re the most insufferable of swots. Perhaps an attempt to appear more desirable is in order?

Hermione: You find me tolerable, you swot.

Tom: I value your mind. Your temperament matters very little. This conversation is below you, although I, uh, understand your desperation. What I can’t wrap my head around, is how you find Weasley so appealing. It’s the strangest of things.

Hermione: I’m not, he isn’t… You’re fond of my company. I’d wager you sorely missed my presence when I paid my Bulgarian friend a visit.

Tom: You mean Viktor Krum, the world’s most famous seeker? Half-man, half–

Hermione: Nott half-mentioned you were an hour or two early picking me up from King's Cross...

Tom: I simply misread the time of your arrival. Anyway, it’s foolish tempting me to rid myself of your companionship, my dear. I'm begging to be persuaded by just about anyone. Although I’d hate to search for another to engage in verbal fore—(clears throat)—duels with, it’s not an impossible task.

Hermione: And who would replace me? Mulciber? Carrow A, or perhaps, Carrow A? Lovely Lestrange, who confuses clockwise for anti-clockwise? Unlike your lackeys, Viktor’s a sensible man. He's spending next summer with me.

Hermione: He has a pair of eyes and ears—and a tongue—that he puts to good use.

Tom: Vot you don’t fancy ‘im, nor do you appreciate his talents in flying.

Hermione:

Tom: I thought so. Brooms are for sweeping dead leaves. You're a bloody swot. You deserve another bloody swot. And if you’re insinuating my lack of abillity befriending wizards of exemplary stock, look no further than Bellatrix Black. Powerful, cunning and partial to me. Also, a Black.

Hermione: She’d lick your boots if you wish it.

Tom: I wish it. She will oblige.

Hermione: Oh, shut it, Tom! With what you’re up to, there can be no telling who you brush shoulders with. Promising myself to individuals you consider cattle—

Tom: Do not mistake my restrained contempt for anything else. Why don't you consider employing tactical strategies you picked up from playing chess with Ronald? The purebloods have some utility to boast of, aside from their elves, manors, and dwindling health and wealth. Being wed to a Malfoy would be advantageous, truly—

Hermione: They’re valuable to you and you only. Oh, you're so salivating at the possibility—an alliance with one of the ‘Sacred Twenty Eight’ to ensure your footing in the wizarding world!

Tom: I can secure their approval without auctioning off your—virtue. Four centuries have passed since Henry VIII. And Hermione, forgive me, but you have nothing, not even fifty galleons to your name.

Hermione: I’m resourceful enough to earn a measly fortune. Should the Ministry reject my inquiry, I can still be Hermione Granger, best-selling author of—

Tom: Your reputation precedes you.

Hermione: A pseudonym, then! Faced with the possibility of unhappiness for the entirety of my wand-wielding life, crawling on my knees for an inkling of respect I will never receive? Not a chance, thank you, I’d rather starve.

Tom: I won’t allow it. Nobody would dare, for they will be met by my— You’re the pragmatic one. Better accept you're growing old a spinster.

Hermione: I’m not craving for romance—I just cannot resign myself to a miserable co-existence with a man I shan't speak to! A marriage of convenience does not bother me in the slightest, but—

Tom: Then, if you fear that I cannot find you a fitting match, or if my ambitions are getting in the way of your—happiness, then I suggest that you search for one yourself. Or take on lovers if your need to… arises.

Hermione: I have.

Tom: Have what, exactly?

Hermione: Found someone, I have. We’re well-acquainted—he’s every bit as determined as myself, maybe more. Brilliant thinker who can see the bigger picture, perfect foil for someone as meticulous as me. He’s this tall and well-built, just about your size, really. Irritatingly handsome and charismatic, can make puking an art form. Our conversations are plenty stimulating and challenging—

Tom: I think I’ve heard enough. Pray tell, then, why pester me with such betrothal nonsense? Are you seeking my blessing instead? If you’re confident with your belief that you’ve met your equal, then by all means, go ahead. Tell me the date and time, and I will be there in my best robes and behaviour to send you off towards the proverbial English sunset. I can even write you a toast if you require one. To Mr. and Mrs.—Severus Snape!

Hermione:

Tom: Should or shouldn’t I judge you badly? Granted you’re a smidge inferior to me, but you’re the only person who can almost keep up.

Hermione: I measure up to you! I happen to possess the same number of Outstanding N.E.W.T.s as yourself! I have managed a perfect Arithmancy score, broken Hogwarts records—

Tom: Oh, you’ve never failed to remind me how I—

Hermione: I’m asking you. To marry me.

Tom:

Hermione:

Tom: I’ve always thought the Sorting Hat made a terrible judgment putting you in Gryffindor, but it’s clearly incapable of mistakes. A neat piece of old-world magic, don’t you reckon? Now, if you’ll excuse me…

Hermione: Wait.

Hermione: Tom Marvolo Riddle! I said stop right where you are! No, not one step!

Tom: I suppose I am permitted to shuffle in place?

Hermione: Are you so thoroughly displeased with my proposition that you cannot even offer me a denial—

Tom: My father... has allowed me to sell part of my inheritance. I was holding off informing you of this development until the deed of sale is finalised, but when you’re such a troublesome, impatient woman to deal with, it’s unbecoming.

Tom: The flat’s in Bloomsbury. I have plans to build an extensive library of sorts. If we are to live together in the near future permanently, I suggest—

Hermione: Permanently?

Tom: Did you ever picture yourself with someone else? Well, I have never imagined such a thing. We’re merely continuing our co-habiting arrangements – we’ve lived under the same roof since we were 10, for Merlin's sake. You can keep your dignity intact for as long as you wish.

Tom: I suppose a signed document changes nothing between us, and if it makes you feel more secure about your future…

Hermione:

Tom: Hold out your left hand. There.

Tom: Close your eyes.

Hermione: What for?

Tom: If I’m not mistaken, a congratulatory kiss is compulsory after accepting another’s hand in marriage, or am I?

Hermione: You’ve never been interested in upholding traditions.

Tom: Matrimony is, one that you’ve coerced me into. I’d rather not smell of spittle, but the prospect of you harping about how ungentlemanly I am…

Hermione: Not to worry. I’m plenty satisfied with the outcome of this conversation.

Tom: Wouldn’t you want to be… more than satisfied?

Hermione: I’m not the one making declarations of celibacy…

Tom: Just shut up and close your eyes, Hermione.

Hermione: I’m keeping my surname.

Tom: Very well. I need a whole study to myself. Bigger than Little Hangleton’s. Strictly off-limits to your abomination of a pet. But if you want to volunteer Crooks for target practice…

Hermione: Is it a yes?

Tom: I agree to be your husband-in-waiting, Hermione. Shall I see you at dinner?

Hermione (beaming): Will you offer a toast?

Tom: You’re the most dreadful witch I’ve ever met.

[unpack-my-heart]

Above, Beneath, Betwixt, Between - Chapter 9

@tinyarmedtrex​ @violetreddie​ @eds-trashmouth​ @constantreaderfool​ @xandertheundead​ @moonlightrichie​ @deadlighten​ @appojoos​ @annoyingtozier​ @burymestanding​

Read on AO3 HERE

The kiss changes both everything and nothing at all. The everything that changes, the hands that reach for each other in the hushed dawn, the eyes that lock over morning cereal, the afternoon laughs that melt into each other, the evening caresses on smalls of backs, is painfully overshadowed by the nothing. This nothing looms over their every moment, stolen moments shared together in ecstasy, rapturous but constantly aware of the behemoth that sits in the corner of the room and spits at them.

Richie’s leaving. A fact as constant, as reliable, as the autumn wind.

If Eddie hadn’t hung onto Richie’s forearm with a vice-grip as Richie welcomed the estate agent into the house, if Eddie hadn’t sat on the porch, face schooled into careful apathy as the estate agent took photos of the now finished cottage, if Eddie hadn’t sobbed with wild abandon into the frigid midnight air, great wracking moans that heaved Richie’s heart out of his chest with ghostly arms, Richie wouldn’t have guessed anything was going to change. But everything was going to change. Everything, and nothing at all.

It takes three weeks for Richie to book his flights. He opens and closes the page, getting as far as typing Edinburgh International to LAX into the search bar, but without fail, his hands shake violently and the laptop slides off his lap with a satisfying thud. Eventually, with a belly full of Dutch courage and Eddie squeezing his hand, he manages it. His flight leaves in a month.

The house sells easily. A young couple buys it, and they visit three times before putting the offer in. The man brays about the way the light floods into the study in the morning, and the woman squeals about the terrace balcony on the second bedroom. Richie accepts the offer, despite the fact it’s five grand under the asking price.

One week later and the For Sale sign is replaced by a bright red beacon, SOLD. More times than he’d ever admit, Richie catches Eddie staring at the sign with malice in his eyes. Richie always makes sure that he looks away before Eddie can catch him staring.

Two weeks, and they’ve hit the half way point. They’re still sleeping in separate rooms. Eddie had packed all of his possessions into boxes the day after Richie had booked his plane ticket. Richie only lasted six minutes of watching Eddie carefully fold his jumpers and his socks and those fucking tartan pyjamas before he had to excuse himself to wail violently in the bathroom. He’d given himself three minutes, before wiping his eyes furiously with a balled up piece of toilet paper, and emerging from the bathroom with a watery smile and tired eyes. But, as soon as he caught sight of Eddie sat on the bed, one of Richie’s old fleeces clutched in his hands, his attempts at self-preservation proved futile. They’d collapsed in a heap on the bed, a mass of shaking limbs, clutching, scrabbling hands and hushed confessions. I adore you, I adore you, I adore you.

Three weeks. They’d spent the last days in bed, moving for nothing but sprints to the toilet and visits to the kitchen. They don’t fuck. Richie surprises himself with the realisation that he doesn’t want to fuck Eddie. Not yet. He can’t bear the thought of their first time being a goodbye fuck, a ‘I’m sorry I’m leaving you’ fuck, a ‘you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I’m still going to leave you anyway’ fuck. So they don’t. They lie together, they touch often and kiss sometimes. Eddie drags his nails down Richie’s arm absently, a soft scratchy feeling, as if to remind Richie that he’s still here, if only for now. Richie spends most of his time running his hands through Eddie’s hair, hair that was once immortalised in a plastic-perfect quiff but now stands on end, wild and free. They talk, regale each other with animated stories from their past. Richie tells Eddie of Bev, of Bill and Ben and the time they all got drunk and swam in the water feature of their college, he tells Eddie about his mother, about the time she took him apple picking when he was seven. Eddie tells Richie about his mother, a long, painful tale that ends in sorrow, but he also tells Richie about Rupert, and how they’d met and how the sky caught fire the first time they’d kissed. Richie had expected jealousy to bloom in his stomach, hot and bitter, but it didn’t.

“What’s America like?” Eddie asks on a Wednesday afternoon.

Richie tightens his grip around Eddie’s waist. “It’s … pretty fuckin’ shit most of the time, corrupt politicians and gun crime and hatred and bigotry but …”

“But what?”

“My parents lives there, and … it’s home, it’s shitty, but it’s home. Well, it was home, I guess”

“Was home? Why? What changed?”

“You gonna make me spell it out for you, Eddie Spaghetti?”

“You know I am,” Eddie said, batting his eyelashes coquettishly. Richie rolled his eyes.

“You’re such a little shite, you know”

“That sounded pretty Scottish”

“Mike’s been rubbing off on me”

“I should jolly well hope he hasn’t been rubbing off on you,” Eddie said with a faux-stern expression that was so ridiculously, so absurdly Eddie that Richie couldn’t take it anymore.

“Eddie?”

“Yeah?”

“Eddie, you know – I … You know that I really …”

“What? C’mon Rich, spit it out”

“I …”

“Richie”

“I really think we should mow the lawn tomorrow afternoon”

“…Oh”

– X –

Richie loved Eddie. It was a fact as clear as ice, as real as snow, as blatantly obvious as the nose on his face. The “I adore you’s” flowed easily, the “you’re my entire world and more” came naturally, but the admission of love, the wrenching his chest open, displaying his heart, that was different.  Telling Jasmine he loved her had been easy, partly because he’d never meant it. Endless false confessions. Perhaps it was cruel. Regret wasn’t something that Richie was used to.

“I’m going to stay with Mike”

“Huh?”

Eddie slumped down onto the sofa next to Richie, and tucked his head neatly into the junction between Richie’s neck and shoulder.

“I’ve asked him, and he said I could stay with him until you … if you … y’know. Until then”

“You know I’m coming back, right? I’m going to come back for you”

“I know you want to”

“Eddie,” Richie implored, shifting on the sofa until he was looking directly into Eddie’s eyes, “you’ve got to believe me, I’m going to come back for you”

“I believe you’re going to try”

Richie grabbed Eddie’s hands. “Eddie, please”

“Mike said I can take Mr Chips out anytime I like, I might bring him around here, check up on the house sometimes”

“Don’t change the subject”

“I hope they don’t change the house too much, I’d be ever so sad if I came back and it looked different, if it looked –”

“Eddie!”

Eddie closed his eyes, pulling away from Richie slightly.

“If you promise you’re coming back to me, it makes it too hard. I’ll just sit and wait, and I can’t … I can’t do that”

“I told you, I’m coming –”

“Don’t,” Eddie said, eyes still closed, “stop it. Just – tell me you’ll try and that’ll be enough”

“I’ll try”

– X –

Mike calls it a practice run. A trial run, he’d said, seeing as the last time Eddie stayed with him ended in a sleepless night for all three of them. Eddie’s reticent at first, initially refusing on the grounds of being patronised, but initially relenting after Richie pleaded with him that it probably was a good idea, if not for Eddie then for himself. Slowly, like melting ice, Eddie agrees. They bundle themselves into Richie’s car, the same car that Richie will return to the dealer the morning he leaves, and drive to Mike’s.

Mike’s house is warm, almost uncomfortably so, and Richie watches as Eddie peels his sweater over his head, face flushed red.

“Thanks for this, Mike. You’re a good friend”

“What about me?”

A familiar voice echoed from the kitchen.

“What the fucking fuck? Stan?!”

“Such a lovely greeting, Richard. Ever the pleasure to see you,” Stan said, sardonically, as he passed Mike a small tumbler of honey-coloured liquid.

“I thought you’d flown back to Ireland?”

“I did. I came back, though. I’ve grown rather fond of Scotland, and the things that live in Scotland”

Mike’s face flushed scarlet, and Richie hooted with joy.

“Well, well, well! The plumber and the wizard, a true storybook romance”

“Richard, do shut up. How are you feeling, Eddie? Mike tells me you’ll be staying with us for a while,” Stan said, turning to face a rather down-trodden looking Eddie.

“I – I was, but if you’re staying here too, I don’t want to … I don’t want to impose, you know”

“Shush, you’re more than welcome here. Has Richie told you about Skype?”

“Skype?”

Stan rolled his eyes at Richie. “Have you really not told him about Skype? Isn’t that what all the long-distance lovers are doing these days? Skype sex?”

Richie slapped a hand over Stan’s mouth, but got bitten for his efforts.

“Take your damn hoof off my mouth, Richie! All I’m trying to do is help you in your long sexless months ahead”

“We haven’t … um … we haven’t done that, not yet” Eddie stammered, face letter-box red.

“You haven’t? Huh. Well, Skype does serve purposes other than getting you virtually laid, I suppose. Do you still want me to show you what it is?”

Eddie nodded wordlessly, and followed Stan into Mike’s office leaving Richie and Mike standing in the living room.

“Ah take it ye told ‘im then?”

“Whatever do you mean, Michael?”

“Ye know exactly wha’ ah mean,” Mike said, passing Richie his own tumbler of whiskey before going to pour himself another. “Ye know exactly what I mean. The fact ye didn’t balk when Stan mentioned you two fuckin’? That’s how ah know ye know what ah mean”

Richie slumped into the cushiony arm chair, folding his limbs awkwardly. “Yeah, I guess I told him”

“It went well though, aye?”

“Sort of. I mean, he feels the same and … I know he knows that I adore him, but how well could it possibly go when I’m leaving him the day after tomorrow to fly back home to a country I no longer consider my home?”

Mike sipped his whiskey coolly, “ah see”

Richie sighed. He could hear Eddie’s voice floating through the house from the office, Stan’s voice chasing it.

“If ya don’t come back, if ya decide to stay in America, yer gonna have to tell him yerself. Ah won’t do it for ya”

“I am coming back,” Richie spat, but Mike just shook his head.

“Ah know ya think ya are, but be realistic, Rich. It’s a big commitment to make to someone ye’v only been involved with for a few weeks”

“That’s … that doesn’t even make sense, I’ve … I’ve loved Eddie for longer than a few fuckin’ weeks, Mikey, you know that”

“Aye. I do, but does he?”

“…Yes. He must know, I tell him all the time how much I adore him”

“Aye, I’m sure ya do. But does he know ya love him? It’s different,” Mike said, simply.

“I haven’t … managed to say those words yet. Not exactly, but he knows. He must know”

– X –

“Hiya, Eds”

“Hello, love”

Richie’s heart swells.

“This is weird”

“I know”

Silence falls around them. Eddie’s face, pixelated and two-dimensional on Richie’s screen, looks small and distant, and Richie’s fingers itch with the desire to reach out and stroke Eddie’s cheek. He does just that, but instead of flesh, warm and soft, the pads of his fingers meet glass, unmoving, cold.

“How are you?”

“I saw you less than three hours ago, Rich”

“I know, but a lot can change in three hours. Have Mike and Stan convinced you to have a threesome with them, yet?” Richie asks, cringing immediately as the words leave his mouth, but Eddie just laughs.

“Not yet, but hey, you never know, loneliness does strange things to a boy”

“Do you think you’re going to be lonely?” Richie asks, and now it’s serious. The smile slips off Eddie’s face like butter.

Eddie shrugs, a tiny movement Richie can barely see. “I guess. Probably”

“We’ll skype every day right? I’ll ring you twice a day, if I have to. We’ll talk all the damn time. Ask Mike to get you a phone, we can text, we can –”

“Rich,” Eddie interrupts, “it’s going to be okay. You don’t have to talk to me every waking second of every day. I’m going to be fine”

“It’s not you I’m worried about,” Richie mutters, but thankfully, Eddie doesn’t hear him.

They talk for hours, until Richie’s eyes start to droop, weighed down with leaden tiredness, and the pauses between their conversation grow longer and longer until they’ve drifted in and out of sleep in comfortable silence for over an hour. The last thing that Richie mutters to the slumbering Eddie are those words he can’t bring himself to say when Eddie’s awake.

[littlebitoffanfic]

Perfect Moment

Fandom: Friday the Thirteen Characters: Jason, Pamela Relationship: Jason/reader Request: heya! It's the Jason!Anon from earlier~ Super excited you're open to doing this though. So like I said, i really loved your jason imagine and was wondering if you'd maybe wanna put that 'into fic form' basically? Like the reader was friends with Jason growing up and didn't care about the deformity but then he died and her parents took her away until one day (bonus points if on the anniversary of his death or his birthday) she comes back and they reunite and fluff? If not lemme know AN: I kept it a little closer to my headcannon just by having his mother a little more involved. I hope that’s alright 😊 Original headcannons: http://littlebitoffanfic.tumblr.com/post/176634985554/dating-jason-would-include “Stop it, STOP IT!” You screamed, thrashing against the kids holding you back. “HE CANT SWIM!” But the others continued to chase him along the floating rafts. You watched in horror as he stumbled a little then tripped. He looked to you, searching for some kind of help. Turning your head, you looked for the adults. They were meant to be here, they were meant to be watching. “Please! Leave him alone!” You scream out, tears streaming down your cheeks as you struggled against the two pairs of hands that held you in place. They were 2 boys who were three years older than you, so they easily held you back while their little friends chased Jason. Then it happened. Jason nearly got back to his feet when he slipped and fell head first into the water. Your heart stopped as you froze. He couldn’t swim. The boys froze as well, knowing that he couldn’t swim. They hadn’t intended to chase him INTO the water, just to spook him. You heard one of the boys behind you turn and try to call for a councillor but they didn’t respond. You managed to slip out of their grasp only to have a larger hand grab your arm. You turned to see one of the adults with his shirt partly open and lipstick on his neck. Another ran past and dove into the water but they immerged without him. “Let me go! I can find him. He doesn’t trust you.” You fought just as hard against the grown up, but with little success. You knew Jason wouldn’t go near the grownups because they dismissed him and treated him poorly, but maybe if you could get to him. “Sorry, no ones allowed in the water.” The man shook his head. Something in you broke and you twisted around and bit down on his bare forearm, hard. he screamed out, letting go of you and you took your chance and ran to the water. Only for another grown up to grab you by the waist, lifting you up and carrying you back to the cabins. You trashed and screamed, crying out his name. -------------time skip ------------------ You woke up in a cold sweat as your own screams echoed through your head. Sitting up, you gasped for air as you looked around you. It was still dark in the small motel room. The clock showed 4am although it flickered on and off a few times. you felt your tears running down your cheeks and you were quick to brush them away as you got out of bed, heading to the bathroom. You knew there was no point in trying to go back to sleep. Your nightmare would just replay that day on a loop anyway. Even after so many years, you still remembered it like it was yesterday. Sometimes you would still be a child, and sometimes you would be an adult. But the outcome was all the same. After Jasons death, you took a turn for the worse. But who could blame you. Seeing your best friend murdered then neither the kids nor the councillors facing any repercussions for their actions (or lack of), made you bitter and resentful for any adults that weren’t your parents or Mrs Voorhees. She had been one of the first to comfort you, wrapping you in her arms as the two of you sobbed. That day, you lost a friend and she lost a son. She understood why your parents were concerned and helped when it came time for them to take you away from that place. She would stay, but she hated the sight of you staring out at the spot, hoping he might return. You later found out that she had given your parents a massive lump some of money to put you through school and college. She had been saving it for Jason, but now wanted you to have it. So you went to the best school and graduated with top marks. For a few years, you studied a few different coursed but nothing ever stuck. You were smart, and had a wide range of talents but you never really connected with anyone again. So you travelled a little by yourself, earning money through your art. But then your mom and dad were involved in a crash. One which saw you left as an orphan and you didn’t know where to go. parentless and friendless, one place suddenly popped into your mind. Camp Crystal Lake. You stayed for as long as you were needed, giving your loving parents a nice send off and seeing their estate was handled correctly. They both had life insurance and a chunk of savings which was all left to you. This plus the sale of their home and a few other assists meant you were set for life. 5 months after their death, you packed up your car. Some items you put into a long term storage but the sentimental items like their wedding rings and a locket came with you. a weeks dive had lead to you spending the last night on the road at this motel. It was okay, a little dingy but just enough to get a decent nights sleep and a breakfast. You glanced at your wrist, the purple and blue friendship bracelet was tattered and seen better days, but it was made for you by Jason, so everywhere you went, it went. You had made one for him, the same colours to represent you both. You ran your brush through your hair while you contemplated spending another night here. You had already missed a full days travel because you decided to stay again last night so you knew you had to move on. Besides, if you left at 6, you would be at crystal lake by 4pm. After packing up your things and going down for breakfast, you handed back your keys and paid your bill. Heading out to your car, you couldn’t help but feel a slow building dread. Maybe it was the fact the day was dreary and grey. You arrived at the entry gate at 5.30pm, a little later than you would have liked but the roads were dangerous, so you took it slow. You felt a shiver run through your spin as you pulled up outside a cabin. Even though it was still daytime, the rain and black clouds made it look later than it was as you got out the car, pulling your hood up. Looking down at your bracelet, you felt a small rush of hope. You didn’t even know if she was still here. You could see someone moving about in the cabin she and Jason had called home. It took 10 minutes for you to gather the courage to walk to the cabin. walking up the three steps to the porch, you pulled down your hood once out of the rain and knocked three times, your hands shaking violently. There was a pause from inside, then you heard footsteps coming to the door. It opened and you nearly dropped to your knees as Mrs Voorhees stood in front of you, aged but still fully recognisable. And apparently, you were the same. “[y/n]?” She breathed, her hand dropping from the door as she stared at you. She reached out a trembling hand, pushing a strand of your wet hair back out your face so she could see your eyes properly. When she did, her face broke into a smile as her eyes pooled with tears. She pulled you into her arms, hugging you as she swayed. You cuddled into her, your own tears making you sob onto her shoulder. She felt your shaking body and you both ended up kneeling on her porch in each others arms. She pulled you into her home and set you down on the couch before rushing to make you tea. “Is it just you? Will your parents be coming back?” She asked when she returned, placing the cup in front of you on the small coffee table in the centre. You dropped her gaze, looking away. “They, um, they passed away.” You cleared your throat, fresh tears coming into your eyes. “Oh, im so sorry.” She sat next to you, wrapping one arm around you while placing one hand on your lap comfortingly. You told her about the crash, and about how you had decided to come back here. She said you could stay with her as long as you liked, and that she had seen a cabin not too far from here up for sale, if you were wanting to stay. ---------------time skip ----------------- “Mrs Voorhees? I bought some fresh bread.” You call as you enter her cabin, your handmade bread in a little tin to protect it. “Oh lovely.” She smiled as she walked out from the kitchen. “Smells delicious.” “Thank you.” You giggle as she takes it from you and heads back to the kitchen. After staying with her for 2 weeks, you had put in an offer for the cabin about a quarter of a mile from hers. It was accepted and you had been living there for 4 months now. But something strange had been happening. “May I ask you something?” You ask, following her to the kitchen. She hums a yes. “Have you noticed someone in the woods?” Pamela freezes, not daring to look at you as she glances out the window. “N-no, my dear. Why?” She stutters a little as you slid into a seat at her breakfast bar. “Well, ive just felt like someone’s watching me. Im sure ive seen someone moving about outside my house at night. Its just.. strange.” You shake your head, unable to describe it. “How so?” she asks, sitting down across from you with a raised eye brow. “Its not… I don’t think their… dangerous. It feels more like having a protector than a stalker.” You scorn yourself, unable to put it into a way that didn’t sound ridiculous. “Maybe you do. Maybe someone’s looking out for you.” She smiles kindly and it gives you some level of peace to your mind. “Oh, while Im here.” You suddenly remember. “One of the councillors is asking around about… him.” there was a moment of quiet that rushed over you both. “We’ll finish it all soon. Only a few more days I think.” She looks at you for your reaction to which you nod. After years of resentment that built up, she had offered you the only thing to stifle that need. She first told you about her plans after you ran in on her killing a couple who had been having sex. You had kept the girl while she killed the guy then the girl. You had joined her (after she had offered you an escape if you promised not to tell). So you helped to kill the young councillors. You vowed you wouldn’t let them open this camp again. It would disrespect Jason’s memory. Leaning back, you smiled as you looked up at the walls, which had a number of pictures hung up. Of the 8 photos, 2 were of her parents and their wedding, and the other 6 were Jason. You were in 3. “You two were always attached at the hip.” She smiled fondly, following your gaze to her son. “Your parents often joked with me that we’d be arranging a wedding about now.” “You might have been.” You smiled sadly. ----------------flash back----------------- “please take it off?” You begged, your pigtails bouncing as you jumped excitedly. Only a week before the tragic incident, you could have never guessed how drastically your life was about to change. Jason, with a small huff, pulled off the bag he wore over his head. His face, which was severally disformed, made him hid away from people. The only people he didn’t push away was you, his mama and your mom and dad. “I heard your mama saying we have to get married.” You giggled, pointing between you both. It was true. She had been joking about it over coffee with your mom. Jason glanced to the floor, a small blush dawning his normally pale cheeks as he glanced back to you. He adored you, anyone could see that. Even if it was a puppy crush, that didn’t stop every adult thinking you two were destined for each other. “If we did, we could live together and stay up late and drink all the fizzy drinks we can! It would be so much fun.” You giggle, skipping across to your room to the shelf. Jason ran up behind you, nodding excitedly as you pulled some books off the shelf and fell to the ground. Jason joined you as you opened the books up and spread them out. All on pages where the main characters were getting married. “I want to wear a dress like her.” You point to one of your favourite characters, having always wanted to wear a dress like in a the fairy tales. But Jason’s eyes were on another book. In that illustration, the two main characters were leaning forward and kissing while guests threw white confetti over their heads in celebration. He reached out and tapped the page, looking back to you in fear as he pointed to himself. Years of friendship had created a silent communication between the two of you that baffled the adults. “yeah, we’d have to kiss. My mom and dad do it all the time.” You nod but that didn’t seem to answer his question. He pointed to himself again and looked down, running his hand up the side of his misshaped face. “Of course I do.” You reach out, taking his hand off his face and answer his silent ‘would you kiss me?’ question. Jason jumped at your response, beaming at you as he grabbed both your hands. “You wanna practice?” the two of you leaded forward, meeting each others lips. A totally innocent kiss, one that adult would chuckle at and call cute. One which made an adult you smile back on fondly. When you pulled back, you were giggling but that didn’t cover the blush on your cheeks. Just then, your mom called you both for dinner. You dragged Jason to his feet, promising that when you got married, you could eat whatever you wanted for dinner. ---------------present -------------------- When you were walking back to your cabin, you felt the gaze of someone. You knew they were there, you knew it in your gut that someone was close by, but when you around you saw nothing. As your house came into view, you saw there was something on your porch. Frowning, you walked a little fast until you could clearly make out what they were. Daffodils. One of you favourite flowers when you were a child. Jason would pick some from his mothers garden when you were upset or if it was your birthday. Walking closer, you saw about 10 had been left on your porch. You picked them up before sliding to sit on the step. Tears rolled down your cheeks as you smiled at the flowers and looked up to the forest that surrounded the cabin. Taking one, you left it propped against your step before you went inside to place them in water. When you glanced back out about an hour later, the single daffodil was gone. --------------------time skip ------------ You gasped for air as you stumbled through the woods. It was dark and raining heavily. this couldn’t be happening again. The blood that covered your hands was mixed with wet dirt from where you had fallen a couple of times. Pamela Voorhees was dead. You gasped for air. Not another one. Not someone else you loved. You had just been in time to see that bitch councillor swing an axe and take her head off her shoulder. You screamed out in anguish as you watched the last person you had allowed yourself to love be killed. Killed. A rage took over you as you ran at the girl, taking her to the ground and punching her in the face. When she tried to swing the axe at you, you grabbed it and ripped in from her hands, straddling her torso and bringing the blade down into her skull one, two, three, four times. You began to lose count. Finally, you pulled yourself up and stumbled back from the murders, eventually running into the woods. sobbing, you ended up catching your shoulder on a tree and you fell to the ground in a wreck. Everything around you was collapsing again, and there was nothing you could do about it. You screamed in vain as you tried to relieve the pressure that rested heavily on your chest. Pushing yourself to your feet, you took a deep breath, trying to get it straight in your mind what you would do next. but you just broke into sobs that wrecked through your whole body. Until, you heard something move in front of you. Your head snaps up and you freeze. about seven foot away from you stood a man. He was tall, reaching at least six feet and maybe 6 inches tall compared to your smaller height. He towered over you and yet, he seemed scared of you. He wore a sack over his face, the moon showing a single eye hole for him to see out of. It looked like the type of thing Jason would wear. Jason. It couldn’t be. He couldn’t be alive. looking away, your eyes closed as tears flooded your eyes again. “You cant be him.” You breathed, more to yourself than to the man. You heard him coming closer and you opened your eyes again to see him holding out something to you. You looked into his large palm and saw two things that made your heart jump into your throat. In his palm was the head of a daffodil, like the one you left out a few days ago. And around it was a purple and blue faded friendship bracelet. You raise your right hand, the very same one on your wrist. The one he had given to you, which meant that was the one that you had given to Jason. While your wrists hadn’t got that much bigger, he had grown massively, so the thought of him carrying around your friendship bracelet with him all this time. It could only be him. A smile dawned your lips as a fresh spark of hope went through your body. “J-Jason?” You looked up as you step closer. Your heart was hammering and your blood racing. You didn’t know how much more you could take tonight. A single nod was enough to send you over the edge as you collapse to the floor unconscious. -------------------time skip ----------------------------------- When you woke up, you had been carried back to your bed and tucked in. From the moment you woke up, you had felt that spark of hope once again. This was different. Even after your parents past, you knew Pamela might still be around. But you never thought for a moment that Jason might still be alive. The first few weeks, you didn’t really see him again but you understood. While he knew who you were, he didn’t know you. But that didn’t stop him staying close to you. The disappearances of the councillors was investigated and decided it had been one of the guys who was unstable. Said guy was at the bottom of the lake but the police think he is on the run. Even Pamela’s murder was made up to him rather than the girl and then you. You were given a miss because you had been in town during one of the murders and people had said it couldn’t have been you. Plus they doubted you could take a woman’s head off. Pamela was buried next to the empty grave of Jason’s. She was given a nice send off like you had done you own parents. You had seen Jason’s figure by her grave a few times but left him. But his presents became known more and more. When you walked through, he forest, he would follow you at a distance. It was nice and calming, knowing this great beast of a man was protecting you. It made you shiver at the thought. today, you had decided to try and lure him closer for the first time. It was his birthday today. You knew and remembered every year. But this year, you had bought him a few little things from town as well as painting him a portrait of his mother which had come out perfectly in your eyes. You planned to bring him back later but, for now, you wanted to wash up. It was a warm day and, for the first time since you were a child, you wanted to take a dip in the cool water of a lake. taking a towel, shampoo and conditioner and changing into a bathing suit and putting a summer dress over your suite you had picked up from town, you went to the lake which was about a ten minute walk from your home. Placing your things near the water, you pulled your dress over your head and slipped off your sandals. Walking slowly into the water, you smiled at the feeling of the fresh water on your skin. You walked out till the water came up to your chest and ducked under the water. When wet, you went back to the shore and grabbed your shampoo and conditioner to wash your hair out. Once done, you thought about getting back out, but then you looked out over the sparkling lake and you wanted to swim for a while. Going back out to your waist, you slowly started to swim. You kept close to the bank, having not swum in years but you found it was like riding a bike. Your body still knew what to do. You ducked your head under the water to wet your hair again. Coming up, your hair fanned out around you in the water and you felt nice and cool in the hot sun. twisting in the water, you floated on your back with closed eyes. Then you felt something was off. Opening your eyes, you glanced to the bank and saw Jason. he was pacing the bank desperately. He tried to come into the water but only got the water to his ankles and he moved back. You could see how tense he was and how desperate he was looking at you. He was scared. Twisting back to your front, you started to swim back to him. “jason, its fine. Im fine.” You call out to him but that didn’t calm him. When you were able to reach the bottom, you stood up and started to walk out of the water. You thought of running, but then you imagined yourself falling over and him freaking out even more. When you were up to your knees, you saw Jason charge into the water. You reached out for him, thinking he would just take your hand and lead you out. But he didn’t. He wrapped his arms around you and swept you up into his arms. You couldn’t help but laugh at the feeling as he pulled you out the water. But you could feel how hard his heart was hammering in his chest. He was really worrying. He was panting and his whole body seemed to tremble as he looked up at you. Once on the bank, he set you down and looked you over for any sign of injury. “Im fine.” You smile, reaching out and taking his hand, as you often did when you were children. He froze, looking down at your smaller hand in his own. You notice his green jacket was now partially wet from picking you up. You suddenly felt a little exploded in your swimwear. Ducking down, you picked up your towel and wrapped in round your torso, smiling at Jason as you did so. The you grabbed your dress and, after quickly drying yourself off, you pulled it over your swimming costume. Sure, it stuck a little because you were still a little wet, but you thought it was better to show him you were okay. you glanced down and realised that during his pacing, he had knocked one of your sandals forward into the water. “Damn.” You whispered, darting down and picking up your now soaked slipper. But before you could consider what you were going to do, you were swept up into his strong arms once again. He didn’t both picking up your shampoo, conditioner or soggy slipper, but you didn’t mind as he started to carry you back into the woods. He lifted you so you were perched on his shoulder, his arm wrapped security around your legs. You smiled at the action, feeling like you weighed next to nothing. You placed your hand on the other side of his bagged head to steady yourself. You could feel his malformed skull under the bag as he tensed under your touch, glancing up to you. But you just smiled, looking in front of you both as Jason turned back to watch where he was walking. When you reached your home, Jason slid you off his shoulders. You had left the door unlocked but as you padded up onto your porch, Jason stayed back. You opened your front door and were about to go inside until you realised he wasn’t following you. He had stopped at the stairs, looking down at them as if he was scared to step up. Turing back, you leaned against your door. “Jason?” You called to him. “Do you want to come inside?” Jason paused, staring at you like you were some kind of angel before nodding and slowly climbing the stairs. Once he was close enough, you reached out and took his hand, dragging him inside like you use to do when you were children. Once inside, you turned to him, your eyes falling on the mask which felt a little like a brick wall now between the both of you. “Could, could you take it off?” you asked, your eyes darting to the bottom of the bag over his face. You saw his whole body tense and he took a step back from you, his eye moving to the floor. Hunched over on him self, he shook his head. you considered leaving him, but something drove you to push him a little. “You know I never cared when we were younger. Why would I now?” You duck your head a little and he glances up at you. When he meets your gaze, you smiled softly. He took a few deep breaths and shakes his head again. You felt your heart break a little because he no longer trusted you. That bond was broken. Looking away from him, you blink back tears. You thought that when he finally came to you and spent time with you that it wouldn’t be a problem just like when you were children. Maybe he thought you were like the ones who had hurt him as a child. The thought made your heart ache because you loved him. You loved him. The realisation dawned on you as you realised why you were so drawn to him. That child like love you had felt had exposed since you had seen him that night in the rain. You thought your heart raced when you saw him because you were excited to see your oldest friend, but that wasn’t the only reason. You loved him deeply, whole heartedly and eternally. You hadn’t realised it but your tears were running down your cheek. Jason moved forward, taking a hesitant step towards you. He didn’t realise your tears were something more than just you bring upset. They were part of a complex hurricane of emotions. But he didn’t see that. He thought it was purely because he had refused your request. you looked up, your eyes wide with tears as he reached up and started to draw the bag up slowly. “Don’t.” you blurt out, holding out your hands to stop him. “Don’t do it if you aren’t ready. You can wait until you trust me.” He looked out of the one eye hole and you felt like he was looking into your sole. The intensity coming from him was overpowering before he continued to raise his shaking hands to his bag. Slowly, he pulled the bag up over his face and off his head. He refused to meet your gaze once his face was revealed, instead his gaze fell to the floor like he was ashamed or embarrassed. But you couldn’t pry your eyes away from his face. His face had matured immensely since you had last seen him. His skull was bald and misshapen but he barley had any hair when you had known him. His right eye was sunken a little and not in line with his left and his nose was a little flatter than normal. His cheeks had small indents and dips. His mouth seemed to droop at the side but you couldn’t tell if it was him controlling that. But to you, he was ever so handsome. He wasn’t the boy you remembered. His new height, strength and muscles compared with his matured features was enough to drive you mad. Then you realised he was waiting for you to do something. He had glanced up to you but when he met your gaze, he dropped it again, a soft whine leaving his lips. It broke you. Walking up to him, you reached up and cupped his cheeks. He moved his face up so his eyes met yours. Moving closer, you press your lips to his in a soft kiss. One of your hands ran down his cheek to rest on his broad chest which you could feel his heart hammering under his shirt. After a moment, a shiver ran through his body and his hands grabbed your waist as he slowly responded to your kiss, moving his lips against yours. You could feel how he trembled under your touch but responded so eagerly to your affection. You pulled back to gasp for air before feeling him lean forward to retrieve another kiss as if it was his new source of air. Your hand slips to the back of his head, running down to his neck, keeping him close. Your body was pressed against his own, his height dwarfing you but you felt like you were both equality as dominating in the kiss. You were glad because you were scared it might intimidate him but he seemed just as eager as you were. When you parted, you were both panting. Your cheeks were a dark red from a deep blush as you looked up at Jason. He was breathing heavily staring down at you in surprise. Then he collapsed to his knees in front of you, his hands grabbing your waist as he presses his forehead against your stomach. It took you a moment to fully realise what had happened just because your head was still spinning from the kiss. He was on his knees after he had received his first kiss from you. Looking down, you might have thought he was frightened but then he looked up at you. In his eyes, you saw he adored you and was staring up at you with awe. There was tears in his eyes but his lips were pulled into a smile. You dropped down in front of him, sitting across his lap as his arms engulfed you once again. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, burying your face in his neck and holding him close as he mirrored your affections. You pressed soft kissed to his neck whenever you could. Suddenly, you remembered the small items you had gathered for him. “Oh, I almost forgot.” You scrambled out of his lap and darted to the side, grabbing the wrapped items. When you came back to him, you kneeled in front of him, presenting them to Jason. “Happy birthday.” You smiled, seeing something that reminded you of surprise in his eyes. His hands, still shaking from before, took the presents. Slowly and without even ripping the paper, he opened each in turn. With each one, his smile grew wider until he got to the portrait of his mother. His smile faltered and fell as tears welled in his eyes. you moved closer to him, wrapping you arms around him. you allowed him to take as much time as he needed before he turned to you. His arms locked around you as he silently thanked you again and again. Her portrait was hung up on your wall, right beside your own parents wedding photos. After she were hung up, you pulled Jason to your sofa, sitting with him on your sofa. That night, he stayed the whole time with you, answering your questions as best he could and asking his own through a note pad. You fell asleep on his shoulder and he didn’t move you, instead wrapping his own arms around you and lying with you till morning. --------------------time skip --------------------- Since that first kiss, Jason never left your side. the only reason he left you was if someone came too close to the camp and he would rush off to protect you. Sometimes you would follow him to try help. He would be annoyed with you for putting yourself in trouble but then you showed you could handle yourself and he would relax a little more. “Can you come on a walk with me?” You ask, as you meet Jason on the porch of your home. He ha just come back and was slightly bloody, but you didn’t mind that. you could see the smile even though he now wore a old hockey mask. You much preferred this to the bag. Jumping down the stairs, you took Jason by the hand and led him into the woods. It was late afternoon and the sun was starting to set in over the lake. You had been waiting for him to get back for a few hours. Of course, Jason would do absolutely anything for you, regardless of what it was. As you walked, you looked down at your intertwined hands, your heart skipping as you saw how truly bigger he was than you. How his hands could rip people in half, had killed people, and yet he was so gentle with you. His touches were sometimes filled with fear, like he was afraid he would break you. Looking up at Jason, he glanced over and caught your eyes. You smiled sweetly at him, being truly happy for the first time in a long long time. Jason ducked down, lifting you up and placing you daintily on his shoulders, as he had done so many times before. You giggled, allowing your fingers to trail over the back of his neck and sides of his head. leaning down, you press a soft kiss to the top of his head. Jason froze, but not from your affection. No, he heard someone moving in front of you both. He lowered you to the ground, cautiously before pulling out his machete which he carried on his belt. “I’ll head down to the lake. Come find me when your ready.” You smile, reaching out to run your fingers over his forearm before walking away. Less than 10 minutes and a scream later, Jason found you by the river. You had taken off your shoes and socks to dip your feet in the cooling water. When you heard him approaching, you turned to see him over your shoulder and you couldn’t help but smile. Jason froze. The image of you, beautiful and perfect, with the crystal blue water and setting sun in the background made his heart stop. He never dared to join you in the water, but he was no longer completely fearful you might be swallowed by the water. you moved out of the water to him, taking his hand in yours and pressing a soft kiss to his knuckles. in that moment, everything was perfect in both your eyes and his.

[kpopyourcherryy]

My Sun and Your Moon - Pt. 1

Length: 1,600

Genre: Fuff, angsts, smut(in later chapters), drama, college/idol AU

Characters: Im Jaebum x (15&) Park Jimin (Jamie) 

Part: INTRO :: 1

In the morning, Jimin cooked a breakfast big enough to feed the whole dorm and left a massive mess for the men to clean up. But not before she tapped her phone to Jaebum's and got his Kakao ID.

Jimin: Yah you! Like breakfast?

Jaebum: It was great. Thank you!

Jimin: Oh I wanted to tell you!!

Jimin: #sorrynotsorry for being so drunk last night. I really liked talking to you. I hope that we get to spend more time together. See you soon k?

Jaebum: #sorrynotsorry that you were a mess it was cute.

Jaebum looked at his phone with a smile and Jackson pushed him a little.

"Who you talking to?"

"Jimin."

Jackson smirked and raised an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? You like her?"

Thinking about it for a moment he stared at the mirror in front of him. "I think so. Yeah."

Yugyeom slipped, hitting flat on his back when he heard the comment and pictured Kevin's fiery, little gay eyes when he heard.

"I think the fuck not!" He yelled from the floor pointing to Jaebum. "Anyone but Jimin. She's not for sale."

Jackson tossed his towel at their group member. "Shut up. Jaebum and Jimin would be fucking cute as shit and you know it."

BamBam darted his eyes back and forth between the two men that slowly began to fight louder and louder until Youngjae snapped.

"WHAT IS SO GREAT ABOUT HER?! IS HER VAGINA MADE OF MONEY?!"

BamBam, Jackson, Yugyeom, and Jaebum snapped up at him as one, "WATCH YOUR MOUTH!"

Jinyoung leaned back a little and looked over to Youngjae surprised. "Might wanna just step down my dude."

Jimin walked from her classroom and bounced her way over to Kevin as they exited his class. "Want to get lunch?"

Kevin groaned, "I need to get some studying done."

"Come on you can study without a power snack."

Kevin agreed with a sigh and Jimin pulled him to the cafeteria where they sat next to one another.

Jaebum: Have you had lunch yet?

Jimin: Yes! I'm eating with Kevin.

Jaebum:  What did you have? Anything good?

Jimin: Salad with extra carrots. What about you? Eat anything good lately.

Jaebum: Food?

Jimin: I mean unless you want to tell me that you eat some fancy pussy.

Jaebum: I don't think I've known you long enough to ask if I do that yet.

Jimin: Oh smooth.

Kevin looked up from his book to Jimin as she giggled and he raised a suspicious eyebrow. "Who are you talking to?"

She hummed, "Hmm? Oh JB. He's a total dork. Smooth, but a dork."

"Who's a smooth dork?" Yerin asked as she sat beside Jimin.

"Jaebum."

She looked at her a little surprised, "Im Jaebum?"

Jimin shrugged, "I don't know. If you would have gone to the party last night you would know who I was talking about."

Sighing, Kevin confirmed the last name. "I can't believe you're talking to him not even knowing his last name."

Jimin smiled, "What's the last name got to do with how cool you are."

Yerin looked at Kevin with concern, then back to Jimin as she took a large bite of her salad. "Cool? Jimin, who is this guy?"

"BamBam's group member. They got into the next group JYP is going to debut."

"BAMBAM'S GROUP MEMBER?" She exclaimed and quickly looked around making sure no one was looking. "Jimin, you don't like this guy do you?"

"JB?" She looked at her friend confused. "Of course I do. He's super cool and he's smooth as butter. I love it."

Kevin sighed a mouthed to Yerin, 'butter'. Knowing good and well that meant, Jimin more than liked the man. Jimin was definitely the type to fall for a guy quickly without knowing it herself.

"How much do you like him?" Yerin asked.

"Enough to stay with him and not leave with me last night," Kevin interjected before biting aggressively into his sandwich.

Jimin looked up at her friend with annoyed eyes, "Kevin, I was drunk."

"You're never too drunk to go home," Yerin added.

"He left before I was ready."

"It was two in the morning."

"I hadn't even drank that much."

"You wanted to lay with him."

Jimin opened her mouth to talk and found herself at a loss of words.

"Do you like him Jimin?" Yerin asked and Jimin pondered it for a long while.

She set her phone down and began tapping the tips of her fingers together. "Yes, but only because I think that he's a good person."

Kevin sighed and slammed his hand down at the same time as Yerin. Jimin laughed a little and leaned away from them. "Come on you guys. Do act like that. We all know I'll never actually like someone in a romantic way. Hyungwoo fucked me up too much for that."

Kevin's eyes softened at the drop of the name and he shook his head. "Really Jimin?"

"Jimin it's okay if you like someone like that." Yerin’s soft voice said and she touched her friend's shoulder. "You know we just worry."

"Thank you for worrying about me, but I don't like him like that."

Kevin rolled his eyes, "I know when you like someone like that."

"Hey don't pull the 'I've been your friend forever' card on me you dick licker."

Kevin sipped his juice, “Looks like I don’t need to then.”

Jaebum: Let's hang out. We're going to the beach later. Come with us?

Looking at her phone, she bit her lip a little and smiled.

"Is it him?" Kevin asked, knowing good and well just what the answer was.

She pursed her lips and spoke past them. "Maybe."

Yerin tapped her wrist and turn the phone to look at the message. "Jimin you're allowed to like someone."

Shaking her head she sighed. "We're JUST friends."

Jimin: Let's do it!

When Jimin arrived at the beach, Yerin and Kevin with her, she was greeted by Jaebum. His lips pulled into a smiled as he opened her door and she jumped into his arms hugging him.

"I'm so excited that I get to swim today. I haven't been here in weeks."

"Than let's swim."

With the seven members and three friends, they all played sandy games and took turns floating in the water. BamBam and Youngjae argued about the BBQ while Jackson mixed drinks and the friends met Mark for the first time. Yerin gushed to Kevin over Jinyoung while he played a game of volleyball with Yugyeom and Mark. Jimin and Jaebum seemed to always be found next to one another, and ended up in the water alone with one another body surfing the swells as they rolled in.

Jimin ran from the water and called to Jaebum to follow her. He chased after her, and she ran down till she found a tall rock wall covered in small creatures.

"Let's get some," She smiled and he stared at them.

"How are you going to get them off?"

She knelt down and rubbed her hands together. "Watch."

Jimin tried to pull the shelled creatures off, but they quickly sucked to the rocks refusing to be moved without a fight. Jaebum looked around and walked away for a moment returning with small sunburnt shells.

"Here."

She looked at them and pouted, "I wanted fresh ones."

Jaebum pulled her up and laughed, "I'll bring a knife next time so you can get them off. Okay?"

Jimin sighed and nodded, "Fine, but you better remember."

The two walked along the beach, back towards their friends, slowly picking up shells off the sand. Jaebum listened to each small, frivolous thing Jimin said as though she was telling him the secrets of the earth. When her eyes caught him, she felt her heartache and stopped to stare at him

"JB."

"Mmm?"

"Why do you want to be an idol?"

He smiled softly at the woman, "Promise you'll believe me?"

She shook her head, "Not if it's a lie."

"How will you know if I'm lying?"

"Because it will sound like a lie."

Jaebum sighed a little with a smile, "I want to take care of my family." Jimin hummed in response and he tilted his head a little, "Don't you want to help yours?"

She laughed, "No. My dad is super rich." He looked at her surprised and she softened before his eyes, "I don't want to ever have to deal with the problems that come with that kind of money ever again."

"You think that money makes things worse?"

Jimin nodded and began to pick through the sand again. "I would rather struggle forever than have a nice house." Jaebum knelt next to her and pointed to a shell. "Money only brought my family heartbreak."

"Don't your parents pay for you now?"

"They bought my apartment, but I work for everything that I have."

Jaebum seemed to watch Jimin as she kept moving along the beach and felt his heart warm. The feeling washed over him and he felt a kind of happiness that pulled his lips into a tight smile.

Looking back Jimin smiled at him and waved for him to follow her. "Come on you dork. What are you looking at?"

You.

[devilspilled]

my mother gives me such a weird feeling like. i feel like im in a latin magic realism novel and i can feel the rotting, aching stretch of time and my own cursed blood, and that both of those things will stick to me to my adulthood and i won’t be able to shake them off. (even though i know for a fact that i can -- it took 7 years in college but i can)

but the issue of my mother is like... she fucked up all three of us (me + siblings), and it’s turned us into open wounds, but because of that, we’ve gotten some degree of self-awareness (me the most, to a painful degree, my brother the least but there’s this hole he knows exists and fills up with womanizing and cigarettes).

my mother is also an aching open wound and she doesn’t know, and she remains to be the saddest and the most horrible human being i’ve ever known. everything she says bugs me? even when she’s not being explicitly violent and volatile, she’s just, eternally shackled to the opinions of other people. it hurts her, it makes her angry, but she’s needy and desperate for validation anyway. she pours upwards 100k pesos to buy the latest shoes and the latest bags and she takes pictures of them and posts them online, trying to get attention, getting hostile when you criticize them -- then she like, claims it’s so hard to feed us because we’re so hungry all the time and we have no money (even though i’ve repeatedly told her not to do weekly groceries, i’ll cook dinner, i’ll clear out the pantry etc). she spends a lot of money on skin care and panics at the slightest bumps and wrinkles even though she’s pushing 50, trying her hardest to push back the natural decay of time... and then does the same to other people? like. she’d get all up in my face and then tell me i have a bump and a blackhead and that people would judge me. she threatens me because i don’t use her teeth whitening products. 

things she’s said as life lessons, but came off as the saddest thing i’ve ever heard a human being say:

“a woman’s identity is her hair.” 

“when you’re married, you can’t go off without your husband anymore. it’s just not appropriate. you gotta stay home and take care of the children.”

“back in my college days, all my roommates loved me because i served them. i cleaned up the house. it was spotless. they made me dinner and cried when i left them. if you push yourself until your body’s hurting, everybody will love you and nobody will complain about you.”

“if you’re a woman, you gotta be a superwoman. you gotta pay the bills, take care of your family, be a confidante and look beautiful even though you’re tired. if you’re less than that, your husband will cheat on you and leave you.” (top tier saddest thing ive ever heard tbh)

“none of you children love me. you’re all just using me for food and shelter. that’s it, isn’t it? it’s so hard when you’re a parent. i know you’ll all leave me, that’s why me and my husband have to take care of ourselves.” 

there’s so much more but i dont know, man, i dont know. i try my best to be nice to her and get her to self-actualize even a little but every time we have a good conversation she just ignores everything i say. every time i feel like i’m getting somewhere with her, the next day, her mood flips for no reason. everyone’s her enemy and using her. every time you real-talk her, she’ll use the things you said in confidence as an attack, and then wonders why people don’t talk to her anymore. 

her friends are like, opportunists and flatterers and they b l e e d her dry and sometimes she even knows it but she doesn’t say no because they’re nice to her and like her facebook posts. “i met these sales girls at the mall and they love me, they’re always so happy to see me, so i buy their products and get them food.” they’re using you. because you’re easily won over. they’re salespeople and they want. your. fucking. money.

why are you like this

[cheollies]

Fanboy!Jeonghan

you could say Jeonghan was one of the very large group of original fans

like he’s part of that group that’s like ‘I’ve been with them since predebut’

he actually flaunts it but at the same time he doesn’t really talk about it unless someone asks him how long he’s stanned the group

Jeonghan is like highkey okay with everyone knowing he’s your fan

he has a lanyard that has your name printed with large font, he has a keychain with fanart he got from a fansite as a gift, he has a phone case with your name on it

He’s just ready to tell the world about you

Discovered you predebut

He actually came to know your other member first because they were on a survival show before being eliminated

and Jeonghan liked that member so much that he kept tabs on them

your company started releasing videos of all the girl group trainees, and that’s how he found you

He got so excited seeing a new video from the company that he actually excused himself from his class to watch the video

This was the first time he saw you

and he was so, he can’t even describe it, it was like the moment you showed up onto the screen, he just knew

He knew you were going to be his bias

and he wasn’t wrong

Officially became your first fansite

He was one of the very first fansites dedicated to the group that focused solely on one member

And he got so popular since everyone in the fandom (new and old) knows his logo and knows that he’s one of the top fansites for you

Jeonghan is respected in the fandom

He’s such a nice fansite too, he doesn’t want to be known as a fansite that is rude or mean or even breaks rules because he feels as though if he gets a bad name then that would tarnish your name

Fansites are known for always being at fansigns or concerts, even overseas concerts, that’s how Jeonghan meets Joshua

KCON was being held in LA and Jeonghan had missed the ticket sales because of work and school and he may have accidentally taken a nap that lasted too long

But he began to search around, posting on social media of his need to get seats close to the stage

And lucky for Jeonghan, a fan called mister Joshua, helps him out

Joshua is an avid fan of Jeonghan’s photos because of the aesthetic appeal and just when Joshua thinks he’s going to be stuck going to KCON alone since his friend ditched him, he finds out Jeonghan desperately needed one

So for weeks before hand, Joshua and Jeonghan are communicating on twitter. There was a small language barrier since Joshua remains more fluent in english, but it’s not a problem since Joshua is learning Korean quickly thanks to his parents

Jeonghan and Joshua ended up becoming great friends after this, and Joshua even spends weeks talking to Jeonghan about the group chat he’s in

and finally, Jeonghan get’s put into the madness

Everyone in the groupchat kind of freezes because ‘wow an actual fansite, that we all know and love, is actually in the same group chat with us’

But it isn’t long before a few days go by that everyone is roasting each other and screaming about their biases

Designated Mom of the group because he’s the second oldest and is often cooing over Chan who tries to update about his life but it always ends up with Jeonghan fake crying over text about how his ‘baby is all grown up’

When he attends fansigns, Jeonghan always gives Joshua his biases signature signed to his name

And then Joshua always text him crying and screaming ‘I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. YOU’RE MY BESTEST FRIEND IN THE ENTIRE WORLD IM CRYING’

and Jeonghan plays it off so cool and chic

Jeonghan is close knit with other fansites too so it isn’t an uncommon occurance for the boys to recieve birthday gifts of their bias

like photobooks, dolls, stickers, pins, pillows, blankets

All the guys just send pictures of them crying while receiving the gifts

and because of this, Jeonghan holds so much power over them and he uses it in a joking way to mess with them

Meets practically everyone in the group since he’s at every group event so he runs into all of them

Jeonghan believes he’s out of the hardcore, head over heels phase for you because he’s been with you for so long

But he can’t deny the fact that his heart actually hurts when he’s looking through his camera lens and your eyes catch onto his

Sometimes he actually has to stop taking pictures because he feels as though his heart is going to burst

You know him

Why wouldn’t you recognize the man who’s followed and dedicated a whole twitter account to you since your debut

The first time you called him by his name without him having to tell you, He was literally about to burst into tears

‘Jeonghan!’ You screamed when he was next for the fansign

‘you remember me?’

‘Of course! How can I forget my number one fan.’ and you give him the widest smile he has ever seen and he just wants to melt right on the spot

The guys in the group chat are always screaming about how you notice Jeonghan so much

‘THIS ISN’T FAIR. WHY DOES JEONGHAN GET ALL THE ATTENTION’

‘BE A FANSITE THEN SEUNGKWAN’

He’s definitely fallen out of the wanting to cry, scream, and have so much anxiety phase of meeting you

Jeonghan has met you so many times over the course of your debut that everything just feels natural and comfortable

He remember how in the beginning of your debut days, he always longed for you to notice him and he did so much to try to get your attention

But not, he loves the way you look at everything else, he likes capturing moments of you doing trivial things like patting the bottom of your other member

but when you do catch him in the crowd, you always smile this very innocent smile, flashing him the cutest of hearts and sending his mind to heaven

Sometimes Jeonghan will even request you to do things, like pose with fake gun you received or even trying to get you to do the ‘oppaya’ song which you did for ten seconds before falling over in embarrassment

A lot of your fansites are kind of jealous because you give a lot of attention to Jeonghan

But so many people back him up like ‘IT’S BECAUSE Y/N HAS KNOWN JEONGHAN’S FANSITE THE LONGEST’

When the new comeback got released, you had received an unnecessary amount of hate, and they were all targeted towards your appearance such as weight

And Jeonghan just got so angry, and he felt so bad, and he was hoping to god that you weren’t reading these nasty comments

It didn’t help that Jeonghan began to notice how your smile was dwindling in his photos or the way you looked as though you had dropped a lot of weight dramatically

It hurt him so much that he started tagging his next few photos with positive messages about how you were perfect the way you were

At the next fansign when Jeonghan finally got in front of you, he looked so worried and he kept talking and talking about how perfect you were beforehand and how you shouldn’t read the mean comments

And it kind of struck you, like here was your fansite, one that has been with you from debut to the present, and it’s like it dawns on you that yeah, true fans are like Jeonghan

Fans who don’t care about your appearance, who love you regardless of your horrible predebut hair, true fans stick with you despite everything

So you smile, and your eyes are kind of glossy and you sincerely thank jeonghan for always being with you

‘I’ll never leave you’ is what he says  

Jeonghan says he’s over the honeymoon period with you, but in his heart he knows that he’s always in the honeymoon period. Everything you do, all the tiny things, everything still makes his heart race a million beats per minutes. That’s because his heart is only of you.

[haeroniel-doliet]

gah another 5 am post eh fellas

fuck i really wanna do ballet. i really rarely become obsessed (if ever) with anything, but for once i’m so so so so soso wanting to do ballet. so bad. i know i might hate it bc im fucing not musical at all, so not in shape, so not comfortable or etc. but at least im 18,(wait fuck 19 now)  and not 45 trying to get in it all stiff and stuck and i think based on all the sweet positivity to adult ballet starters beginners and sure i wont perform professionally but fuck man i dont think i need that. i just want that grace and flexibility and elegance and gah itd be fabulous. i mean even now im pretending to look for turn out and walk around the house like they do in point shoes and i try fix my posture tothe advice by a ballet dancer youtuber who ive been watching so much of. i just i really wanna do it. 

saddest fucking thing is guys, that i could’ve had the chance to go to the fucking royal ballets adult absolute beginner classes. in london. i could have. fuck. u wanna know what happened? i found out about it like a month or two ago and was fucking psyched bc its one of those things that just is too good to be true. the best company in uk?? w adult classes? while im in london?? yeah id have to miss a few weeks bc. whoops i gotta go back up to do my exams,but i couldve at least done a few weeks, come back and done a few last so i’d have had the best opportunity to give this a go in the best environment and then have a kindling to go off with to other available ballets. and not start with some barely managing person in a shitty studio thing. idk. sure so i tell my parents so fuckin excited bc look! its possible! but yeah its expensive, wouldve been abt 90 pound w me being a student and id have to miss 3/10 classes. but still! thin of it gah its making me so sad happy. sad bc guess its now sold out. of fuckin course it is. i told my mom and she just was uhmm ohh i dunno i dunno, oh its adults i could do it, and thinking that maybe getting her involved would mean i have a better chance of going, dont care much for her company but if shed take it as a bonding thing hell, i’ll probably do better than her in class and minor confidence boost as well as if they all others are old old i wont be alone. and she could pass over what they learned when im up in scotland. Guess that was a fuckin mistake. she got all nervous and self concious and put it off with a we’ll see we’ll see about it im thinking. and making it a whole thing like instead of me wanting to go so bad and offering for fun that shed join me, as if im trying to pressure her into doing it and would only go along to make her feel better. uh.... fucking wrong! im so mad actually. bc of course, no matter how often i mentioned it she wouldnt take it seriously to even consider booking me in! no no of course not we’ll see. and then i check before im coming back, dreading and being right that yep. theyre fucing sold out. of course they are its such a fanstastic opportunity! my only fucking opportunity! when ever again am i going to live in london with weeks free to go participate in that? when ever again? never. theyre moving out of london this summer and fuck. just doing some research and the scottish ballet is in fucking glasgow. yes i was supposed to get there if i hadnt been so shit with studying for my exams. (sure i wouldnt be doing archery and wouldnt have all the other wonderful things i now enjoy in aberdeen but fuck its frustrating) and ofc. aberdeen seems to have: one shady dance company that offers ballet fusion. not adult ballet classes. another shady school that practices at robert gordons that have no website nothing. no info how to sign up or if they have adult classes or when its so stupid and weird. maybe ill have to contact them directly idk. sure my uni has a what seems to be a thriving dance society that i have a glitched out membership for. (its 50 pound a year and i have cerrainly not paid that) and i guess they do ballet on the side. but again from a glance around, looks its only intermediate. not beginners. dont think theres that many uni age girls who just wanna start ballet now. 

so it looks bleary. even in finland, i cant understand body parts in finnish so that might just be frustrating if i could even find a place that offers it. not that i’ll have long at all in finland. ill be there barely a month before heading back to uni and i come back holidays. if i wanted to take one of these eleven week courses, i think id have to geta fuckin liscence and a car and drive to glasgow 3 hrs both ways for a class once a week and that sjust stupid. im so fucking mad about this missed opportunity. like my muscles are itching and aching to do it. my legs want to work out in ballet positions. they just rly do. yeah maybe ill have to start doing barre at home from videos to try ease that, but its not gonna be the same and ill do it all wrong bc i have no teacher to direct me or anything. correct either. sure if i had done it and loved it i might still be mad that i have no opportunities to continue like i want to, but at least id have that expereince and could keep practicing at home based off of it.  i am genuinely upset okay. upset betrayed disappointed sad twitchy and ugh. sure tickets go on sale today to swan lake after exams. and by fuck will i go see it. and ill get all the background before it and know it inside and out before i see it (already kinda do) and i will love it. ill bemaybe more upset and more twitchy that i cant do it, that i cant be lie them and that rly sucks. i really really wish by some miracle the school would offer summer courses so that i could just, get myself after exams into one. also another frustrating thing not quite so pressing on my mind is how my dad wants me to get summer jobs, maybe even two. one here and one in finland. sure it should theoretically be easier getting it here, esp. since im 19 now and yeah. i could work in a cafe or store just to get money and have smth to put on a cv thats not 2 weeks. but i dunno i dont particularly want to, i was hoping in london i could get the most of it culturaly (considering ive been a pouting and sad whailer whos not done anything for the last two years) then again i have p much no friends here so if i did go work somewhere theres a slight chance thered be someone i get along with and could hang out w. or visit if i needa back in london. i dunno. things are weird. sure i could try get an admin job w nhs like some lady suggested but its one of those too much responsibilty things, consdiering im shit with work i kinda would prefer to do some physical job like stacking shelves in a shop bc im good at that. but thats not gonna help me in the future. money yes, but cv building or careers wise? nah. i should owrk in hospitality or smth i dunno even i can barely get thru my work to pass rn so  i dunno about job searching. im jsut a mess am i not. regardless maybe i should look if theres other ballet schoolsin london. be desperate, get a job and a ballet class going over summer and do art on the free time i guess. 

okay so fer now ive found a course for like fucking 156 pound thats a 2 day full days course that looks mad cool for having different classes to learn vocab and etc and then a bit of fucking swanlake like yooo.. best thing its in like july but thats also possibly bad bc its july 28-29 and july 30 we move out. man it could be cool tho. then they offer there as well a taster session p much every other week and then a full 8 weeks of class p near by to me. sure this is specifically taught by a man and id prefer a woman but, i guess. since its ideal timing and place. and i got wondering why thats 150 and the national ballet wouldve been abt 90 and i guess there i get concession and it wouldve been only 6 classes considering the dates they had off. i should rly ask if they do do concession bc 150 is a bit steep still. for 8 classes thats almost 20 pound for 75 mins. its kinda insane. theres probably more companies i havent looked at but there is one other thats like a drop in thing 10 pound cash each class and thats a 90 mins so it might be better. ofc. obv. fault being that its drop in so being an absolute beginner w likely a lot older adults idk how id fit in or keep up or get hte most of it. i think ill go try it once regardless. then when back in abdn ask around for taster sessions and beginner ballet. worst comes to worst i wait another 4 years till i get to a big enough city that they have a nice ballet company and somewhere i can live like an adult but also get in on adult ballet and enjoy myself. maybe my industrial placement city will have  a ballet company idk. 

all i know is that im a bit obsessed and everyone says to go for your dreams etc. and as much as i enjoy archery (slowly gonna dedicate to it) and aikido (though training can be frustrating and training with old men isnt that fun) and ice skating is another less of a dream but in the same realm as ballet. that im gonan get new skates for and give it a better try. i just think ballet could  be so fucking rad and im sad that its not so easy rn. and that my mom fucked me over. for that one course that couldve been cheap and amazing and mindchanging. to go to the ballet knowing what some of it feels like would be great. sure id love  a chance to do some after as well u know. ofc it sucks it might cost a couple hundred over summer to these hobbies and i feel iffy spending 180 on a quality waterproof jacket. sure. they spend it but, im v concientious and dont wanna spend much of their money esp cus im not making my own. i guess logically, i should put a bunch of effort to getting thru this term rly well without lies and get a sumemr job. that way, i could theoretically take loan from my parents  and pay back with summer job money w some left over to do as i like with (yeah i should save it for sensible shit but idk) also considering how nice i am my dad might not even want me to pay back. look i dunno. thats an idea. be good, be rewarded w ballet classes and an unstrained relationship w my parents, joyously move back to finland and start next term w a clean slate, hopefully more help and new determination into hobbies. maybe i wanna do 4 sports since i never did much as i was younger. tho sure, i did aikidos cousin taekwondo. ive shot a bow and arrow whenever i had a chance. ive skated since literally like 3 yrs old. and i used to take a form of dance a alot younger. sure no musicality but i think the exercises would be great for my knees and legs and butt and torso and posture. htese are fun sports since i dont like to work out. and since im not comfortable enough in myself to go swim. 

[ftscge-blog]

greetings friends (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ im jay and im excited to b finally making an obnoxious entrance .. Yea couldnt be more late but please (Softly begging) dont be a stranger. i promise to overwhelm u with ideas and headcanons about our characters eating pasta or arguing about who gets to eat the pink mentos ... Right ??? right. under the cut u will find a few pointers about my spiritual sage and i will post some possible connections tomorrow (although id be MOre than happy to brainstorm more). Also, dis klutz hasnt got a soulmate yet so if someone reads this and goes ‘yea cool’ ☺ .. here is ur chance ....... we can work magic ????? okay 

as per usual, if u would like me to im u about conspiracy theories or to plot summnnn bonito give this a HEart. Alternatively if u want to give mark the zucc or pity like, dats also welcome. Thank u

!!!!!!!! tw: death, depression !!!!!

kendall jenner + cisfemale + she/her — have you met sage hawke? they are a twenty-two year old furniture sales advisor known as the conundrum. a pansexual cancer, they are astute + attentive, as well as mercurial + phlegmatic. their soulmark is a olive branch behind her ear, and they can’t feel the emotions of their soulmate, who happens to look like any fc. // jay. 20. she/her. gmt.

❃ sage was born in berkeley, california in the back garden of a school bus turned tiny house to a pair of flower children that did not plan to become parents and underestimated just how much it would shift their otherwise, spontaneous lives. they were far from picture perfect, with their tendency to outburst and get stuck when things didn’t go their way. theyd often forget to pack sages breakfast or dress her in unmatched socks, leave her unattended, allow her to squeeze herself into places where she shouldn’t be.. they’d trip over pacifiers and forget to warm up the milk but they gave sage a warm place to come back to with muddy knees after repeatedly falling off the monkey bars and loving arms to fall into after someone made fun of her in elementary.. and she was the kind of person who wasn’t afraid to dig through dirt 

❃ her mother was delicate, she could never secure a real job.. she couldn’t be criticised, she took everything to heart and found it hard to open up to people.. she couldn’t be alone for too long and never slept with the lights off. she met sage’s father at the age of 19..from the moment they saw each other, it clicked. they were soulmates. he was 10 years older than her. He was a childish spirit that never grew up, he never took things too seriously and always had an alternative for any situation. He had a backbone that was able to support both of them emotionally, without him, Sage would have never taken her first breath in the first place. For him, it was always going to be okay eventually??? he was the one to sit sage down after she brought home a bad grade, he’d read her the bedtime stories and teach her her first guitar chords. her mother always looked up to what he would do and try to be the same, but it always felt staged, detached. like she never knew how to react around sage. Like she couldn’t grip her own struggles so, how could she begin to understand her daughters ... difference is, her father thought he couldn’t but he always tried. they balanced each other. around him, it was hard to believe anything could possibly get worse 

❃ but it did.. on her 14th birthday sage got a dog, a golden doodle that jumped with excitement at the sight of sage as much as she did at the sight of him. later that night, her father suggested they all go to a park to enjoy the first day with the new addition to their family and so they did. it was the first time, sage’s mother smiled so big it gave sage and her father goosebumps. he was playing fetch with the dog when pain pierced through his chest and bolted up his spine. in that moment, everything slowed down. sage felt her ears buzz and her sight get blurry, the moment she kneeled down in front of her father and begged her mother to call for help but instead, all she did was stood still. she screamed at the top of her lungs and tried dialling for help but realised, she was never taught the emergency number. she banged her fists against her father’s chest and begged for him to wake up, but it was just as though someone turned off his on switch. sage broke down, curled up beside her father and held the dog in her arms as though to repress his playful nature. the world turned grey that evening, the air felt denser. her mother was taken under care that day after she succumbed from witnessing her soulmates death... they had given her a couple of days before her light would turn off along with her soulmark. it was in these last days that sage learned more about her mother than ever. she learned that she was self conscious about motherhood knowing she couldn’t teach sage the qualities that mattered like resilience, courage and acuity. that she observed without interrupting, that she remembered every single detail of sage’s life more than she recalls her own. sage learned that her mother is where she inherited her tenderness and idiosyncrasy from, that her favorite flower is a blue bell and that sage was her happiest accident  

❃ to bury both of her parents at once wasn’t irrational to sage, it was what was ingrained in their destiny. if one soulmate dies, the other most likely follows. but although sage had remarkable understanding of the world for her age, she could never accept the fact that they were there one day and the next, they were gone. her father never finished teaching her guitar chords and her mother never ate her piece of sage’s birthday cake. how do you go on knowing you can’t go back and replay something in a way that feels tangible ?? how do you go on knowing you are all alone. who do you complain to?? who is there to live for??? ? it is hard losing both of your parents on its own and even harder to accept when you are old enough to make sense of it. seeing images everytime you try to rest that bring back all the pain, not being able to stop the tears from streaming down your face because everytime u do, you realise that with each passing day the memory of their faces becomes more blurry. the voices become ruffled in your brain as if theyre just a fragment of your imagination. you bottle up. you scream, you hit, you tire yourself out and try to shake the feeling off but it feels as though its ripping through your bones and leaving ulcers on your heart that pound in pain everytime you go back to the last time you’ve smiled and realising, you cannot remember. sage’s unapologetic demeanour  attracted the wrong crowd. she was the girl who would leave lipstick marks on necks and who’s voice could be heard at the other end of the hallway having an argument with her high school sweetheart. whoever it was that month. she was unapologetically eccentric, sloppy and unwell. but to this day, the people who really know her see her as an incredibly sensitive individual who deals with her issues hands on. who’s piercingly honest, sometimes too much. someone who is able to convey their vulnerability in ways that seem lunatic and astute all at once. she is incredibly tough, she’s able to force anyone look at themselves in the mirror, see themselves in a new light and turn their lives around. just as she is convinced she did

❃ sage was placed in foster care after her parents’ passing and due to her neurotic nature, was never a feasible candidate for adoption.. she worked as a waitress at the local diner owned by a family friend until they realised she was better off helping the chef in the kitchen, away from the customers that often walked right out the Moment sage graced their table JGRIEOGJEI When she turned 18, Sage was given a care plan and various locations where she could make her home. After spending a month, digging through job advertisements and applying to anything that didn’t require a college degree, Sage got one reply. It was an informal email requesting an interview for a furniture sales advisor in captiva island, florida. one of the places on the care plan list. She packed everything she could and moved to Captiva. the next morning, she arrived at the furniture shop and was greeted by a greying man with wood sand on his jeans and a lady with too much hairspray in her hair waving at her from across the counter. And the rest is HISTORY ???  from the moment they’ve welcomed her into their shop, Sage was overwhelmed with the same disorderedness she grew up around and the more she got to know the personalities of her new bosses, the more she learned to appreciate them. coming into work felt more like home than the place she had lived in, with freshly baked pastries ready for her to munch on at her break or a story to listen to in between the busy times. the more they knew sage, the more they allowed her to express her feelings about daily frustrations, accepted her random spurts of energy and understood when she needed a day off or two, or more. soon enough, the moments when she wasn’t at work, she was spending on their couch, looking through their albums of children that had left their nests and simpler times, when all they had to worry about was their curfew. they weren’t soulmates but they were best friends and didn’t let destiny determine their life. Sage looked up to them like no other, comparing their life to the tragedy of her parents’, convincing herself that chasing after your Soulmate, whoever it may be, isn’t worth the chance of risk at all. After working there for 4 years, Sage became like family to the owners of the shop and for her 21st birthday, they decided to gift her with their offering of parenthood. Later that summer, the Hawke family became sages legal parents

❃ i will post some questionnaire later to clarify her personality a little more but it’ll all come through her dialogue .. u know who she reminds me of ??? sophia from girl boss??? or tiffany from silver linings playbook?? shes painfully observant and a huge overthinker. she doesn’t filter her speech and oftentimes, she says things she should not on impulse. she’s neurotic, she’s erratic, she will pick petty fights and blow things out of proportion when you catch her on the wrong day. its like that lyrics thoUGH ‘when im happy oh god im happy??’ you will see it from the way her eyes crinkle and the ways she can’t seem to relax her body. every emotion overwhelms her.. she loves and she protecc until her knuckles bleed and she’s stubborn, she’ll never let you win the argument unless she loves u and she understands that u are probably way wiser than she is. Shes a klutz, she’ll trip over her own feet taking out the trash and spill Literally everything that isnt left empty. She likes little moments in life, the profound ones like that one time her friend let her drive his car even through she didn’t have her driving license or that one time her friend opened up to her even though they never do. She remembers all of those profound moments very clearly and holds onto them for dear life because to her, they are what matters .. Please plot w me if u got to this point because ... DAMNNN :’) u really read all det..... 

❃ why the olive branch ??? its understood to be a symbol of peace .. reconciliation. maybe they met it felt like an ice pack on a bruise ?? maybe they met each other and it felt as though there’s been some kind of a mistake, that they were nothing what they expected their soulmate to be ? maybe they even considered removing their soulmark because it felt so wrong that two polar opposites were meant to make things work?? it almost felt unfair??? maybe even the fact that they can’t feel the emotions of their soulmate can be linked to that .. because u know it would be harder to learn to love, platonically or romantically, someone who you cant easily understand? in addition to that, sage is not an easy person to deal with .. she’s erratic, she’s a know-it-all .. she overthinks like no other, shes easily irritated and explosive and she has always been quite cynical about the idea of a soulmate and it shows with how unwilling she is to share all of herself with a stranger.. a part of her written in destiny. Something shes convinced is ... fickle?? So yeah... an olive branch. For all the profound moments when it feels just right. For when the uncertainty fades away :-)

[dumbass-bisexual]

Belgian Waffles, Hot: A Gravity Falls One-Shot

hey all you guys gals and nonbinary pals im back at it again with the stangst fics i hope you enjoy this along with all of my other works will be posted on my AO3. please feel free to let me know what you guys think!!!

Summary: Stan, in the midst of his grifter days, runs into some old friends.

“And that’s how you mop the floor. Oh, and, Sal? Make sure you wring the mop out before you put it away.”

I already know how to do this, Stan thought sullenly, remembering the days he and Ford had spent working in their father’s pawn shop as kids. He was somewhere in Kansas, currently living as Salvatore “Sal” Elmwood, an honest man making an honest living. Here at Crazy Bill’s Pancake House somewhere in the middle of Kansas. Where his manager was a gross 17 year old kid named Marty. Who had a face filled with acne and braces.

It had been almost five years since Stan had been kicked out of the house, and he was currently taking a break from the con man lifestyle. At least until the cops were off his tail, or he was struck with some new product inspiration. (The two always seemed to be connected for some reason.)

Wringing out the mop, Stan sighed heavily. It’d been a hard few years; he was discouraged in every possible way. He wasn’t really even sure why he’d gone to Kansas-- maybe because it was in the middle of nowhere. A fly-over state, always overlooked. Kind of like Stan.

And he was right: the cops hadn’t even bothered to come after him here. (Of course, he hadn’t made any new products in a while, but that was besides the point.) When his money started to run out, he’d picked up an application at the pancake house he frequented. The owner had taken a liking to “Sal”, who was a quiet guy from out of town who ordered Belgian waffles, hot, every other morning, and hired him on the spot.

If only Ma and Pa could see me now, Stan thought to himself as he dragged the mop across the floor, which, no matter how many times he mopped, was always sticky. Finally got a real job. Truth be told, Stan could be doing worse. Three seventy-five an hour to clean up after the locals and occasional tourist wasn’t too bad. At least he’d have some funds to his name until he came up with another sales pitch and was run out of the state.

Stan didn’t even bother looking up as the bell above the front door rang. It was three pm on a Wednesday in March. Probably Jimbob coming in for his afternoon coffee, Stan thought idly.

That is, until an eerily familiar voice made him freeze mid-mop.

“Well, I’m not impressed with this service.”

Stan’s heart suddenly threatened to beat its way out of his chest as he slowly turned to look over his shoulder.

Standing there at the seating podium was none other than Filbrick Pines. His father.

Along with his father was his mother, and another person with his back turned, reading the menu on the wall. Stan’s heart stopped altogether as the stranger turned around: he was once again face to face with his twin after almost five years.

Realizing he was staring, Stan quickly returned to mopping, doing a haphazard job so that he could retreat to the back.

“Really, Filbrick,” Ma Pines chided as Stan collected his mop. “They’re obviously understaffed. Have a little patience.”

Ducking his head down low as he rushed past, Stan could feel the judgement radiating from his father.

“Hey, you there!” Filbrick called, impeding Stan’s flight to the kitchen.

Heart racing, Stan stopped and slowly turned around.

“Uh…” he began, keeping his voice low, “you can sit wherever. We’ll be right with you.” Then he hurried to the kitchen, where Stu, the greasy cook, sat reading a newspaper.

Trying, and failing, to calm his nerves, he set the mop aside and wiped his forehead. He didn’t think his parents had recognized him, but there was no denying the way Ford’s eyes had followed Stan into the kitchen.

Stan, to the untrained eye, would be almost unrecognizable now. He had grown a full beard and shaved his head, and had invested in a pair of thick horn-rimmed glasses to hide his face. That, paired with an old baseball cap worn backwards on his head, Stan could easily pass for a different person.

But when you spend 17 years side by side with someone, you’d know them anywhere.

Stan was about to sit down when Marty came in from the office.

“Why aren’t you out there, Sal?” he asked, voice dripping with teen angst and the illusion of authority.

“I finished mopping the floor,” Stan replied gruffly. I could knock this kid to the ground if I wanted, he thought, which was followed immediately by, You need this job, knucklehead.

“Well,” Marty began, in his annoying nasal tone, “Brenda’s kid is sick, and Marcia isn’t in until 4:30, so it looks like you’re gonna have to take this table.”

Stan’s heart stopped as he felt his blood freeze in his veins. Shit.

“Uh… a-are you sure about this, Marty?” Stan stammered. His heart was going to explode out of his chest if he wasn’t careful.

But Marty was already invested in untangling the headphones to his fancy new Walkman and going to sit in the office doing nothing, and get paid more than Stan doing so.

“Just do it, Sal,” Marty replied noncommittally. “I’m sure you know the menu well enough at this point.” And with that, Marty rounded the corner and slammed the office door.

Hands shaking, Stan donned an apron and grabbed a notepad from the counter.

“You got a pen?” he asked Stu, who hadn’t so much as moved during Stan and Marty’s entire exchange.

Stu sighed and handed Stan the pen he kept behind his ear.

“Make sure you write neat,” he grumbled without looking up from his newspaper.

Stan nodded and, steeling his resolve, shuffled out to greet his family.

“Uh… hello,” Stan began, making his voice low and gravely. “My name is Sal, and I’ll be your waiter today.” So far, so good. “Can I, um, get you started with anything to drink?”

Filbrick was the first to answer.

“How’s the coffee here?” he barked, not looking up from his menu.

“Best coffee in the state of Kansas, sir,” Stan replied quickly. He knew the line by heart now, which was good, considering that his heart was currently ricocheting around his ribcage.

Filbrick considered Stan’s response before saying, “I’ll be the judge of that.” And with that, he went back to studying his menu.

“And for you, m’am?” Stan asked, making eye contact with his mother for the first time in almost five years.

Stan had to fight to keep his features neutral as he watched the storm of emotions that passed over his mother’s face.

Stan watched as she looked at Ford, and then back at Stan, mentally comparing the two. She finally shook her head before looking back down at the menu.

“Sorry,” she said slowly. “You… remind me of someone. I’ll have a coffee as well.”

“For-- for you?” Stan asked, turning to face his brother, catching himself last minute from saying his brother’s name, which had almost rolled off of his tongue so readily. Stupid. You don’t know them, remember?

“Coffee. Black.” came Ford’s quick reply. He held Stan’s gaze for a moment before averting his eyes back down at his menu.

“Well, what are you waiting for, a kiss on the cheek?” Filbrick asked, agitated. “Get us our coffee, boy!”

Stan jumped, his gaze with his brother broken. He’d forgotten how… demanding his father was.

“Uh, yes.” Stan shoved his notepad in his apron. “I’ll be right back to take your orders.”

Stan all but ran back to the kitchen, where he grabbed three coffee cups and saucers. Hands shaking, he poured three cups, and grabbed a dish for the creamer.

He couldn’t stop thinking about the way Ma had looked at him. His heart ached at the way she convinced herself that this man in front of her couldn’t be her Stanley-- she’d lost him a long time ago.

And Ford. There wasn’t a doubt in Stan’s mind that Ford knew. How could he not? Stan had shared everything with his brother for 17 years. A beard and some glasses wasn’t going to change that. The way Ford had answered him was like a knife twisted in Stan’s gut. Ford was no doubt angry about the way he and Stan had… left things. Stan could only hope that Ford wouldn’t say anything, especially in front of Filbrick. Suddenly, Stan wasn’t so keen on his parents seeing him now.

“Alright, three coffees,” Stan said, keeping his voice low and gravelly. “What can I get you folks to eat?”

Filbrick almost cut Stan off with his curt reply. “Eggs benedict. Home fries on the side, and white toast.”

Stan’s heart sped up again as he took the time to neatly write out his order. He didn’t need Stu on his bad side too.

“For you, m’am?” Stan asked, ignoring the pang of longing as he turned to his mom.

“I’ll just have scrambled eggs and some wheat toast, hun.”

Stan’s heart shifted into overdrive as he turned to Ford, whose eyes were still focussed on the menu.

“I’ll have the…” Ford looked up and locked eyes with Stan. “Hot Belgian waffles.”

Stan felt the blood drain from his face as Ford called him out. Ford couldn’t have made it any clearer that he knew who Stan was if he pulled out a bullhorn. And all directly under the noses of their parents.

Guess you really get to know someone in 17 years.

Sensing his father’s rising anger level, Stan tried to shake off his brother’s gaze and regain his composure.

“I’ll put those in and have them out in a few minutes,” Stan said, struggling to keep the tremor from his voice. Then, he gathered up everyone’s menus and retreated to the kitchen.

Stu had already fired up the grill when Stan rushed back into the kitchen, ready to begin cooking. Stu wordlessly took the paper Stan ripped off of his notepad and began making the food for Stan’s family.

Stan sat down heavily in the chair in the corner and wiped his forehead, mentally psyching himself up for his next encounter with his family. He couldn’t believe how brazen Ford was being. His brother was obviously still furious with him, even after all this time and separation.

I wonder how they see me, Stan thought, adjusting his baseball cap. Just another loser living in the middle of nowhere. Especially compared to my genius brother.

“Hey Sleeping Beauty,” Stu called, snapping Stan back to reality. “Your food’s up. Get it while it’s hot.”

Stan steeled his resolve as he moved to balance everyone’s plates, a trick he had picked up from a carnie back in Illinois. Back then, he was carrying boxes of contraband Smile Dip, but the premise was still the same.

“Alright folks,” Stan said brightly, passing out plates. “Eggs benedict, scrambled eggs, and,” he met and held Ford’s gaze, “Belgian waffles. Nice and hot.”

Stan broke his stare with Ford, unsettled. Was that pity he saw in his brother’s eyes?

“I need more coffee,” came Filbrick’s voice, making Stan jump. He had to suppress his instinct to cower, even though he knew Filbrick couldn’t hurt him here.

Clearing his throat, Stan replied, “Sure, sir. Can I get anyone else anything?”

“I’ll take a refill as well,” Ma added, giving Stan a reassuring smile.

“I’ll be right back with that,” Stan chirped, hating the sound of his customer service voice.

Stan quickly punched in the prices for their meal, and grabbed the bill as he took the coffee pot over to their table.

“I can take that whenever you folks are ready,” he said before making his way back into the kitchen.

Stan sighed, wiping his dirty glasses on the t-shirt under his apron. I need a drink, he thought idly, knowing his shift wasn’t over for another four hours.

Marty picked this time to make another appearance.

“Sal, once you bus that table, the bathrooms need cleaning. I don’t want any complaints during the dinner rush.” And with that, he retreated to the office, where Stan could hear the Walkman blaring some stupid new-fangled music before being muffled by the office door.

“What dinner rush?” Stan muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose before putting back on his glasses. “It’s Wednesday.”

Stu snickered from behind his newspaper, but didn’t move from his chair.

Stan was a little off put by Stu showing any emotion other than a vague sense of contempt for, well, everything, but he didn’t question it. He figured a guy like Stu would be good to have on your side, especially when the cops came calling.

Stan waited a few more minutes before going to check on his family. Your table. You don’t know them, remember?

“It’s not really a big deal,” Ford was saying as Stan approached the table. “They’re just announcing the fact that I got my doctorate. It’s a small ceremony, really. I’ve already completed all the hard work.”

“Well,” Ma replied, wiping some jam off of her mouth, “I think it’s wonderful. We’re proud of you, aren’t we, Filbrick?”

Stan watched as his father finished his mug of coffee before giving a noncommittal shrug. “I’ll be impressed when he starts bringing home some money.”

Stan could feel his brother’s pain as a sharp pang in his chest as Ford lowered his eyes to the table. Heh, he thought, guess neither of us are worthy of praise in the eyes of Filbrick Pines.

Taking the silence as a moment to intervene, Stan stepped up to the table. “Did everything turn out okay, folks?”

“Fine,” came Filbrick’s short response. Then, he handed Stan the book with their payment and stood up to leave.

Stan stepped back and opened the book to find exactly $10.43, the cost of their meal. Stan’s heart sank as he realized that Filbrick had not tipped him.

Stan, crestfallen, made his way to the cash register when he noticed Ford making his way to the restroom.

“I’ll be right there,” he said to Ma, who had paused at the door before following Filbrick out to the car.

Stan busied himself with putting away the money, and taking a bus pan to the table as Ford left the restaurant. But he stopped short, shocked by what he saw at table 23.

Sitting there, on the table, was a crisp $20 bill that had most definitely not been left there by Filbrick Pines. Stan looked up sharply out the window, and made eye contact with his brother one last time before his family drove away.

Stan quickly shoved the $20 in his pocket before making his way back to the kitchen, where Stu was still reading his newspaper.

“Do you know them?” Stu asked, startling Stan, who was still focussing on slowing his heart rate back to normal.

Stan glanced up out the window, where he could still see the sun glinting off of the windows in his father’s car retreating off into the horizon. He could still see his twin’s knowing gaze as the car drove away.

“Yeah…” Stan said softly. “They’re… old friends.”

And with the weight of a crisp $20 bill on his mind and in his pocket, Sal Elmwood picked up his mop and went back to work.

[dramallamadingdang]

Ermahgerd, somanyreplies...

Mostly because I haven’t had time to sit and answer ‘em.

So! For @mrningbrd, @simblrkersil, @emeraldfalconsims, @simper-fi, @holleyberry, @vampireacademysims, @penig, @serabiet, @kayleigh-83, @getmygameon, @stinkyunicorn, @alexbgd, @fuzzyspork, @crystaldollhouse, and last, but certainly not least, @strangetomato...

mrningbrd replied to your post “Well, this is a pain in the booty...”

Im also having ACR issues even though i 100% finished the story. Same exact issues too

mrningbrd replied to your post “So I had a bit of a think...”

I think i fixed my acr problem. Did u try taking it out and then redownloading it and putting it back in? That fixed it for me

Yeah, I did try taking it out/redownloading/reinstalling. Multiple times. And nada. It’s so frustrating! I was kinda disheartened when you said it didn’t work with having played the story, but reassured when you got it working. :) I mean, I know it works because it worked just fine in my initial install, once the story was played. So, I’m hoping that’s the key. I think it must be, because there are some fundamental changes with how the story neighborhood works once the story is completed. If that’s the case, I’m hoping it’ll still work even though I started the freeplay scenario before doing the story. 

So, I’m about halfway through the story. Hoping to finish it tonight with enough time to experiment in the other neighborhood. I’m encouraged by the fact that I peeked in the freeplay hood and the story rewards I’ve unlocked in the story so far were also available there. So *fingers crossed*.

simblrkersil replied to your post “So I had a bit of a think...”

Melissa Fancey, maybe? (IDK how you feel about her, but I love her XD horrifying flame pants and all)

It was between her and the adult Ivy Copur, actually! But in the end I went with Ivy because I’ve never had her as a playable before. :) I’m sure she’s thrilled to go through this torture.

emeraldfalconsims replied to your post “20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing?”

I think the next time someone asks me what my aesthetic is, I'll just direct them to this post. :P

It’s tough when you don’t fall into one box or another but instead cherrypick bits and bobs from all the available boxes in order to build your own wacky box. :) I think henceforth I’m going to call my game aesthetic “Mutant Hybrid FrankenSHTEEN.” *nods sagely*

emeraldfalconsims replied to your post “So you’re stranded with seven other complete strangers on what may or...”

So I see overlay boxes work? Was not expecting that.

They do! At least the ones I installed do! (Male and female body hair and two tattoo boxes.) It’s likely because the game has the “heatstroke” overlay from Seasons. (And maybe the frozen one, too, but it’s sort of hard to freeze on a tropical island... :) ) Many things work, in fact, but some only after you’ve completed the story. 

I’m still trying to figure out the game engine the thing uses because knowing that will make it easier to predict whether or not a TS2 mod will work and/or which version of a mod to try first. It’s either Seasons’s or OFB’s or maybe a hybrid of the two. But it also has some stuff from BV, like the pirate ship. Those are all just objects, though; the beach lots don’t have surf like BV beaches do. (Which is a shame because it’d be fun to have @maybesomethingdunno‘s surfing mod in it, but I’m 99.8% certain that won’t work. :) And even if it did, it’d look weird without surf. :) )

simper-fi replied to your photo “So what do you do when you have way too many babies on a lot and not...”

BABY CORRAL! I love it!

holleyberry replied to your photo “So what do you do when you have way too many babies on a lot and not...”

Haha! That is awesome.

Heh. It was one of those ideas “born” out of desperation. I had seven babies at the time, couldn’t afford cribs (But I decided early on that rock “fences” would be free, in order to create “rooms” on the lot, if needed), and no one could sleep on the lot with a baby laying on the ground. (Which is SOOOOOOO stupid and needs to be modded out.) Hence, baby corral. It works. For babies, anyway. :)

vampireacademysims replied to your photo “So what do you do when you have way too many babies on a lot and not...”

Lmaaao! Wow I'd go crazy, I cursed my life each time I got quadruplets, now imagine this XD

Well, it helps that there are 8 adults to share the load. :) Nine babies isn’t so bad with 8 adults around, as it’s almost a 1:1 ratio, so long as no one slacks. *side-eyes Orlando Centowski* It’s just that they can’t do much else besides baby/toddler care other than occasionally shoving something edible in their face and maybe taking a nap here and there. :) In a normal two-parent household where at least one has a job, I pull my hair out with just twins. Maybe I won’t, so much, after doing this, though...

penig replied to your post “Preggo Ben!”

At the volume there's about to be, it hardly matters anyhow - nearest person deals with whoever's howling.

Ah, but the problem is that they’re ALL howling at once. :) Basically, they all have to cry themselves to sleep, since there are no cribs to put them in. Well, I do have ONE crib now, actually. One crib for nine toddlers. They get rotated in and out of it. I could buy more now, but the toddlers are all going to age up soon -- and there’s no “selling back” according to the rules I’m using for this scenario -- so I think I might want to save the resources for other things. Like more leaf beds. Hopefully children can use those.... And maybe some hammocks for the adults. I think they’ve earned them. I shudder to think of the hell it must’ve been hell to sleep on the ground in the third trimester...

serabiet replied to your post “In this Castaway scenario I’m playing, the castaway’d townies must use...”

why am i getting incoming village of the damned vibes off this development

It is kind of like that, actually... *laugh* Thankfully the lots in the game are big. Lots of a room for a tribe of the damned children.

kayleigh-83 replied to your photoset “When you spend hours on stuff that’s purely, uselessly decorative....”

Ahh you to so much more trouble than I do! I wish I had the patience to plan it out and apply it. My strategy for making my neighbourhood look better is essentially MOAR TREES!!!

More trees is my go-to, too! :) But actually, I don’t plan this sort of thing. It’s more like, “Hey, that lot opened the Athletic career! Now they need someplace to play.” *plops down baseball diamond in random spot* Then it’s, “Hmmmm, that looks really out of context. *moves baseball diamond close to lot that unlocked the career* Then it’s, “If people are gonna come see the game, they’ll need some place to park their car.” *builds adjacent completely useless deco parking lot* Then it’s, “I’m envisioning cracked windshields. Plus, how’re they gonna tell if it’s a home run?” *plots strategy to put lots under baseball diamond just so that fences can be built.* And on and on.

It’d be so much easier if I could just plop down the hood deco and be done with it, but I...just...can’t....

getmygameon replied to your photoset “So this is what I decided to do with Castaway. Take 8 of...”

Very neat :) you're really making that game your bitch aren't you? LOL jk XD

I’m tryin’! Although lately, it’s more like I’m the game’s bitch, jumping through hoops trying to make things work the way I want. :)                 

stinkyunicorn replied to your photoset “Komei has a “job” as a hunter, so he’s off the lot for a chunk of...”

"Hard row to hoe in this scenario"... You're a poet and didn't know it. I'm enjoying all your Castaway posts!

I’m glad you’re enjoying them! :) I’m having a blast playing it. It’s a great change-of-pace for when I get in one of those “I don’t feel like loading TS2″ moods. And it’s like instant gratification because the game loads instantly, so I can go in and out of the game to screw around with things and test out bizarre, wild hair ideas really easily.

And it was totally accidental poetry; I didn’t even realize it rhymed beyond “row to hoe” until you pointed it out. :)

alexbgd replied to your post “Goopy in Wonderland. :)”

a zoo with sims..

Preeeeeety much, yes. :)

holleyberry replied to your post “Goopy in Wonderland. :)”

Come on Goopy. Sandy's there too. Go after her man.

I totally thought he would! They double-bolt! They’re the only possible pairing with more than one bolt, I think. But.... Sandy goes for Ben Long and Goopy seems to like Andrea Hogan best. Go figure. They seem to be each other’s second-faves, though. And it’s not like it really matters since it’s basically one big polyamorous clan. Which is exactly what I wanted. 

fuzzyspork replied to your post “Goopy in Wonderland. :)”

At least those sand mites he just acquired in his nether crevisce will keep him company. XD

Poor Goopy. Only the lice and the stink bugs love him. :) Well, OK, that’s not true. Everyone loves him except Marisa Bendett; those two are oil and water, apparently.

crystaldollhouse replied to your post “Goopy in Wonderland. :)”

This looks so fun :D

It’s realllllllllllllly fun. Very addictive, too. And beyond being fun to play, it’s really fun to experiment with it, too, to see what’ll work and what won’t. 

strangetomato replied to your photoset “So this is what I decided to do with Castaway. Take 8 of...”

I agree with Fuzzy. this makes me want to play Castaway again too. Maybe I'll start loading that up again as a "just for fun" game.

DO EEEEET! You know you want to. Come to the dark side...

fuzzyspork replied to your photoset “So this is what I decided to do with Castaway. Take 8 of...”

You make me want to track down a copy of Castaway! I'll forever kick myself for not buying the one I saw at a thrift store last year. D;

*cough*games4theworld*cough* I pirated mine, and that site is nice. (No creepy porn ads, at least! :) ) The game’s not legitimately for sale new and unused anymore, so unless you can find a used copy, pirating is actually more ethical than paying more than retail to some shady online “store” that doesn’t have the right to sell it for those prices. *gets very irked at “stores” who ignore retail agreements*  Either way, EA doesn’t get any money out of it, so...eh. :)

emeraldfalconsims replied to your post “Drat! Dang! DOUBLE DRAT!”

This is probably not helpful at all, but I just discovered that in TS2 there's a settings option to add the Pets unlocks from codes shared with friends. I suppose it's too much to hope that they've done that for CS as well.

Not that I know of. I searched around a lot and read lots of “game strategy/hint” websites, and didn’t find anything about it. Buuuuuut, as it turns out I’m playing the story, anyway. In the end, you’re kind of forced to, at least if you ever want to use any of the electricity-dependent items in it. I’m just kind of blitzing through it to collect up all the story rewards, including some I missed on my first play-through.

emeraldfalconsims replied to your post “corruptuslocus: Also ACR 1 vs ACR 2 I know ACR 2 has more features...”

I only use V.1, and the only thing I know of to miss is autonomous proposals and go steadys. Have you seen this much with V.2, Icad?

Last I heard, twojeffs never got the auto proposals/go-steadys working in V.2, anyway. V.2′s kind of an eternal beta, as I understand it. The biggest differences between the two is that in v.2 you have far more control over the settings on a Sim level, so it’s much MUCH more customizable than v.1 is. It also has some settings that I really like, like setting a Sim’s “ideal family size” which further moderates whether or not a pair will try for baby. That being said, you have to fiddle with those settings manually on a Sim-by-Sim basis to get the full effect, which can be tedious unless you’re a person like me who gets off on tedium. So, like I said, which version is “better” really depends on how much control you want to have and how much effort you’re willing to put into it. I like v.2 a lot better, personally, but it requires AL/M&G, so I can’t use it in Castaway.

[ecotone99]

[HM] A random (hopefully funny/entertaining) tale about a young man, a Chevy Spark, a few life lessons, and a car accident.

So this was about a year and a half ago. I was 21 and desperate to get CHEAP/new car. First of all let me start off by saying I was young and dumb (still young and dumb). I tend to make irrational and quick decisions when i’m excited about something. For personal reasons that I don’t wanna get into I was not able to receive a license until I was 21. So when I finally got my license I needed, let me re-phrase that...had the biggest urge/desire to buy a car like the day before my license came in the mail. Also getting a car would allow me to start a new career.

Now for financial, and impatient reasons I was going to finance the car. Now when I say finance I really mean have the LOWEST monthly payment possible. My job requires me to drive 100-200+ miles a day mostly highways so leasing was out of the question. I also did not, and still do not want to buy used. Which is a whole separate argument for a whole different day. Anyway I was literally looking for the cheapest 2018 model car ever created.

It’s a week before fourth of July and the cheapest car I could find was a 2018 Chevy Spark for around 13k. I figured what the hell I’ve waited 21 long years on my skateboard I can wait another week to try and get the “fourth of July deals” to increase my wheel size from 59mm to 200mm.

Boom after checking “cars.com” everyday, on July 7th 2018 I pull up with my dad to a chevy dealership 90 miles away from home. Me, feeling like a Russian mobster (I’m Russian haha) on the outside, and as excited as a young school girl on the inside walk inside with my dad. I pull out my phone and show the sales guy the ad I saw. 2018 Chevy Spark for $10,001 in a lightish blue.

Keep in mind I did NO research. I read NO reviews. My mind was set on this Chevy Spark. You could tell me 9/10 Chevy Sparks are reported to have a mind of their own and drive off of cliffs at 50k miles and I would still buy it without a second thought.

Now I’m sure all of you can relate to a certain degree. You know the feeling of being so damn excited for something. The feeling of wanting something so damn bad that you would do irrational things to get it. In that moment you don’t want to hear anything negative about your decision. You just want IT. At the time it was the only thing I could afford so in my mind it was either the Chevy Spark or never drive a car again in my whole life.

Back to the dealership, the sales guy asked if I wanted to test drive it, and for that 90 second circle in the parking lot (I didn’t even take my time I just wanted to get back and sign the paperwork) I fell in love what felt like for the first time. I didn’t even fall in love with the car I fell in love with the feeling of driving hopefully my neat future car.

This is a Chevy Spark LS. I’m talkin manual windows, no power locking, no center console, cheap speakers, feel ever pebble on the road, get blown off the highway when a gust of wind or even ANY car passes by. I’m talkin a car that teaches you what claustrophobia is. A car that feels like you’re sitting inside one of those electric cars for toddlers. You get the point this was a bare skeleton with a piece of plastic around it. But I loved it.

I had pretty good credit at the time so I was able to finance my first big purchase. 7.9 APR at 178 a month. At the time thats literally all I could afford. Ya know with insurance being so stupidly expensive if you’re young. So after a long day of paperwork and the sales guy telling us he literally can’t even drop a penny off the price I drove my baby home.

Fast forward to January 1st 2020 around 5pm: “DAD I NEED YOU TO COME TO ME I JUST SLAMMED INTO A PARKED CAR GOING 60”

Okay okay I know you’re excited to hear what happens next but let me back up a little.

For my job I spend A LOT of time on the road and in my car. 200+ miles/6+ hours a day is not uncommon. I’m about 5’7 and 150 pounds so I’m not the biggest guy. I’m a nice guy, but the Chevy Spark taught me what it feels like to be uncomfortable. It taught me what anxiety is. It taught me that you can have road rage at yourself.

A little insight on my job; Im an in home sales man for home improvment. The owner of the company I work for (he took a liking to me because he is also Russian) knew I was planning on getting a car. He told me when I get a car he will train me in becoming a sales rep. Promoting me from my position as a telemarketer. So knowing this made me that much more in a rush to buy a car. We drive to appointments everyday, and sometimes just sit in the car to wait/chill in between appointments. So basically 2/3 of the work day is spent in the car, and the work days can sometimes be 9am to 11pm.

Me being naive and irrational did NOT think about these things when purchasing a car. I did NOT realize how important comfort is when sitting in the car all day. Sure the first 6 months I was so excited about having a car that I did not think about these things, but things quickly changed.

I started to get really angry and started to despise working. I would wake up KNOWING I’m about to be very uncomfortable and annoyed inside of my car.

Every detail about the car is horrible. My left elbow rested on what felt like rough old cement, and the rigid surface would leave marks on my arm. My right arm would always be itchy from the cheap cloth armrest. My left leg literally had no where to go. THE WORST PART ABOUT THE CAR THOUGH, my left knee would literally almost ALWAYS be touching the manual window roller handle. Half the time the handle was either directly on top of my knee or directly in front of my knee. I had nightmares about crashing the car only because I knew when I did that handle would be the end of my knee.

There was no storage compartments in the car. I had no where to put my phone, my change, my wallet, anything else comfortably. Because it’s a tiny hatchback my back seats would ALWAYS have to be pushed forward to fit all of my work stuff (giant bags). MEANING I could not push/lean my seat back enough. It was the equivalence to those people in the asian countries that live in the tiny apartments that look lime walk in closets.

Now I’m a music guy so listening to music is a must. Not even a year and my speakers started to blow... The speakers sounded like an old nokia phone in the first place. Or a better description would be when your earphones break so you have to pull out the old trusty $9 backup earphones from ross. Constantly I would think about installing better speakers but just never got around to me

There are 2 lessons to be learned from this pointless post, but one of them is how important comfort is when picking a car to own. I will now NEVER sacrifice comfort in the future. Not just in a car, but in anything.

Okay now....January 1st 2020 at about 4:30pm on a very main road. My new years resolution was to stop smoking cigarettes so this was day one!

So around that time of year it can get slow for my job. So as a side hustle I started doing Uber Eats. Let me take a quick second to say CHEVY SPARK DOES NOT QUALIFY FOR RIDE SHARING BECAUSE IT DOES NOT HAVE 5 SEATBELTS. I was EXTREMELY mad when I found that out AFTER I bought the car.

Since the car is so uncomfortably small it took many many attempts to find a phone mount/holder that was just okay. I finally found one that required my phone to be right in the middle. Keep in my mind this is my first day using it. Also keep in mind I am Russian and it was just new years. RIP to my liver the night before.

Here I am driving 60 on a very main road. My phone is right in the middle and I’m looking at it trying to figure out where I’m supposed to deliver this burger to. Uber eats; pick up food from restaurant and deliver to customer As I’m looking at my phone in the middle, while singing along to my music, most likely thinking about life, 100% hoping my headache would go away, wondering what my girlfriend is doing, admiring how warm my new north face jacket that I just bought is. Basically doing everything but paying attention to the road (And I’m sorry my grammar is getting worse as this post is going its 3am and I stopped caring as much LOL). I’ve been driving for a year and a half now I’m so confident in my self I can drive with my eyes closed using my feet.

Anyway, BAM I look up and my car is basically inside of an Audi SUV. “FUCK!!!!!!” “Fuck fuck fuck fuck” close my eyes cause its a dream open them cause I’m waking up after a nightmare “FUCK”

This is my first accident. I was going 60mph, at this point I’m completely speechless and very shocked. Every one always told me that car was a death wish but after about 5 seconds of stating in front of me I immediately climb over the airbags and exit the smoking, pulverized hunk of plastic.

I slammed into a parked car on the right side of the road. Really horrible too, thank you seatbelt. I don’t even know what to do in this situation so I’m dumbfounded. Witnesses are asking if I’m okay I was so all I could say was “yeah I’m okay”

I called my dad, and after what seemed like a minute he shows up. The owners of the parked car came out of the restaurant all normal accident stuff. I had a sprained finger, bruises yada yada.

Now my insurance wanted nothing to do with is since I was doing uber. I filed a claim through uber’s insurance and they said I’ll be covered. Awesome, score, BUT I didn’t know what gap insurance was at the time. I failed to do my research which I always end up having to learn a lesson cause of sometimes heedless decisions.

I had 8 thousand left to pay off my car loan and 40k miles on the car. I for sure thought it was over. I was done, game over. Every one told me the insurance would pay me 5 MAYBE 6 thousand for the car leaving my to pay off the rest.

Now I’m not religious but by some kind of mystical higher power I was blessed. I pretty much hit the jackpot. My payout was $11,200...

I purchased the car for $10,001...

I got my loan payed off AND received about 2k.

Now if that doesn’t scream second chance I don’t know what does.

To wrap up this long long meaningless story I just want to say a few things.

If you read up to this point I applaud you. It wasn’t a hell of a ride to read this story. It wasn’t the script to the next big summer blockbuster. It was more like, a carnival ride for children ages 3-6.

But there are some important lessons and morals to be taken from this. 1. Fuck the Chevy Spark 2. Comfort in a vehicle is very important 3 Do your research and please get a car that you will love even 2 years down the line. Get something you like. If you cant afford it wait until you can if you can be patient 4 GAP INSURANCE 5 Don’t make hasty decisions like me

After lots of research I am getting ready to finance a 2020 Toyota Corolla SE next week, and I’m very excited!

We live and learn. We make mistakes and we learn from them. I know when it comes to stubborn minds like myself we won’t listen/pay attention to advise that much until we have to pay the consequences. I try to listen more and look things into a different perspective as I get older because the older you get past 18 the more bad decisions screw you over. The consequences weren’t as bad as a teenager but now wrong avoidable decisions can really change your life for the worse. Adulting isn’t easy but thats just the game we call life. Goodnight ya’ll I have to be up in about 4 hours to drive my rental 100 miles to go sell some windows.

OH AND MY LEFT KNEE DIDN’T GET HURT

Ps: Still haven’t smoked a cigarette

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