#and then hes like 'oh. people usually have... a sense of identity that isnt a floating conceptual mass and actually connects to their body? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

oldmemoria · 10 months

Text

i have a lot of unorganized miguel headcanons that float around my brain at times but since i usually think of them at night and forget about them the next morning im just going to continuously update this post probably? anyway here are the ones that i do remember

i will either leave this in my drafts and update it when i want to or ill just edit/reblog with new stuff idk

edit after i stopped typing:

ok its time

fuck you

posts

identity headcanons first, because idk getting those out of the way feel free to get pissed off about these ill just block you 💖

trans man. he/him pronouns. probbably doesnt care if you use gender neutral terms for him because like... why would he, he has a multiverse to stare at

asexual, can't really figure out of i see him as being aromantic as well, i personally just think he's too busy to think about it atm but i dont think hes incapable of it. maybe arospec, like demiro or greyro or smth idk, i just know this mf is asexual.

he is autistic (and probably undiagnosed?) i will die on this hill as if i was a warrior cat defending the sunningrocks i will commit an oakheart fight me on this and i will throw rocks at you and then promptly get crushed by rocks as well (is that warrior cats spoilers um oops sorry)

now to the rest- that i remember- i have not read the comics yet so if some of these are like.. actually canon lmk because that would be really funny

this one might be a hot take but he does not hate miles. he wants to look out for him and definitely either currently regrets or is going to regret what happened in that chase scene. i genuinely doubt he hates any of the spider-gang hes just very, very worried about the multiverse. in his head thats the only way. (i am hoping and pleading that miguel and miles make up somehow, maybe miles doesnt forgive miguel and that totally understandable and would make sense but pLEASE writers i would die if you kept them as being rivals i genuinely would)

he hates Audrey Hepburn, fangoria, harry houdini, AND croquet. he CAN swim, he CAN dance, and he DOES know Karate. he still wont make it though. sorry man.

since hes from the future i dont think he'd be terribly confused by current slang/terms, hed more look at it like we see terms from like... the 80-90s or anything before that as "oh wow people used to say that? huh. interesting."

im going back on a headcanon ive had since i saw the movie im SoRRYYY but he cant curse. from what ive seen from the comics he uses replacements like "shock" and "bithead", thats it. maybe he says fuck on accident or in spanish (he technically kind of does depending on how you see "Ay Coño" being said but thats beside the point).

probably a blue eyes hater idk he just gives me the vibe of saying "jesus christ your eyes are way too blue, get contacts please im begging you stop looking at me" which is probably why him and gwen have so much beef.

i dont give a shit about what the movie says his fangs are not retractable fuck you. (he still has crooked teeth though i will never forget about those <3 )

autism be damned my guy can work a grill 🔥🔥🔥🔥

a lot of people cant really tell if hes pissed or not by his tone sometimes. is this projection? yeah, next question.

he hardly ever sleeps but when he does its like hes dead (at least when its dead quiet, which again, isnt often so he hardly ever gets a good nights sleep). you'd have to use a fucking blowtorch to the face to wake him up.

i also see him as not only having hypersensitive vision but also having elevated senses period. hearing, smell, touch, etc. probably the main reason he sits in the dark with no other noise.

branching off of that he frequently gets migraines of things get to stressful or too loud or if anything is very off about his schedule.

arachnophobe. ha.

cat person.

cat person as in he likes cats not like hes a catboy.. i shouldnt specify that actually that just makes it worse but i will anyway because tumblr hellsite will be tumblr hellsite

he partially likes lego peter because his daughter really liked lego.

ok but like think about it he'd probably be really good at taking legos apart with those claws. like imagine. it'd be nothing for him.

hasnt spoken to gabriel in years. he cant bring himself to reach out and when gabriel does he just doesnt have the energy to try and respond. he has no idea how to, especially now.

this is very specific but he stims a lot with his claws. like extend and retract over and over absentmindedly (mainly because thats what i'd do if i had claws imagine how fun that would be)

he usually bottles up all the emotions that he has, including anger. kind of explains why he lost it in the chase scene in my head because he reached a boiling point. he hates talking to people about his problems.

empanadas are his safe food, also theyre just easy to eat when your mouth is a little funky (i would know i have some fucked up braces theyre great for that 10/10), its mostly just easier on his fangs.

definitely horrible at the whole self are thing. he just forgets, all the time. would forget to breathe if it wasnt involuntary

if you say anything he doesnt particularly like (eg "hey bro are you okay do you wanna talk") he'll just stare at you with his rat eyes like 👁️👁️ until you stopped idk what im saying.

he is a bit touch starved, depending on his mood he'll let people touch him in a friendly (emphasis on friendly. friendly friendly friendly dont take it any other way :/) way.

OH I almost forgot about this one: he hisses. some spiders hiss. so does he. vampire furry energy

he also gets pissed when people call him a vampire so uh... im counting my days oops.

will go out and sit in the rain. (wait would it still rain in the future? is the climate still fucked in his timeline or nah)

like "ah, its water time" and goes out to sit like this:

Man if only there was a rain filter

that is all i have for now maybe if something else comes up ill reblog with new stuff >:)

#across the spiderverse #atsv #miguel o'hara #spiderman 2099 #spider verse #headcanons #his specific tag that i have for him might be.........#errrrrrrrrrmmmmmmmmmm #critter moment #eureka!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#CRITTER MOMENT YES!!#ok you can post this now ash no more stalling

14 notes · View notes

charismaofobedience · 2 years

Text

Idk. I was having some fun thinking about Eden and Crazy:B dynamics today when I accidentally ended up finding some small parallels between their members or something a few days ago, wrote a quick resume on discord and then now fully fledged it into actual text so. Yeah. Have a small and completely senseless Crazy:B + Eden comparison? parallels? analysis? thing i legit don't know what the fuck this is

Starting with Nagisa and Kohaku like. Yeah sure at first there isnt much in common maybe??? But eventually the more you think about it slowly the more sense it makes somehow?? (It was the final one i connected while working on this because of the other ones, and eventually when i finished writing it i was oh). It's about being born into something, to have a role to fulfill from the moment you were born: Kohaku with the Suou family work and being trained to follow this path and Nagisa's with the entirety of the Godfather situation. Through their whole childhood, not really creating their senses of identity and being sheltered from the outside world (Kohaku's zashikirou and Nagisa also being isolated from society for a long time), causing both to have trouble understanding modern society as they weren't grown directly at it, Kohaku learning about it mostly through the internet and Aira while Nagisa's first real "interaction" with the outside being with the Tomoe family.

There's also this somewhat mischievous side on both of them, with Kohaku's either appearing with Crazy:B or Mama and Nagisa's coming out with Ibara. They usually may be seen as distant or calm by those who aren't close to them, but those who are know they are. Kohaku doesn't hold back on threatening others if necessary just as Nagisa doesn't hesitate to bring up the god-mode when necessary with Ibara or Hiyori. Or how, when prompted, the somewhat more childish side of both of them appear - Kohaku when he's with Aira or gets too emotional and Nagisa whenever he ends too curious about something.

The way both care for their friends, too. Both are more comfortable with someone over others (Aira and Hiyori), and no matter how much they care about the others close to them, neither are fully sure on how to properly convey those feelings because of their upbringing, as important as they are to both of them. The ones who, from a distance, may seem like they're the ones being pulled by the others silly ideas, only to sometimes be revealed that some of said ideas are their own.

It's a balance of someone still trying to fully find their place in this society after being secluded for so long. Because, now, they're the ones chosing things for them - No Oukawa family or Godfather to instruct them. Because right now, both of them are free to be themselves.

Hiyori and Rinne. Yeah sure, same dorm, but they also have quite a lot of similarities??? Both may not be of royal blood or whatever, but Rinne was supposed to be the leader of his village while Hiyori was born into the aristocracy, even if not the successor. Grown into families who both seem to have taught them to repress any negative emotions such as sadness or recall sad moments, as this show weakness, Hiyori and Rinne are both bright in distinct ways - Hiyori is the sun, sparkling, warm, cheerful, meanwhile Rinne acts more as the flame, glowing, intense, passionate. Their similarities overlap in distinct ways even if they're the same: Loud, impulsive, selfish, skipping or getting late to practice and sometimes unwilling to take others advices. They walk their own steps and shall drag everyone else with them and their ideas, wanting everything in their accord.

And through all this brightness, their mature and caring side is hidden behind it. Both are, in a way the ones who treasure their unitmate and friends the most in their units. A self-sacrificial self underneath all of that confidence, people who want to protect those dear to them, because even if they may be seen as selfish those closer to them know better: They get attached easily. They care too much. Through all that warmth, both the sun and the flame are kind and simply wish to help others, even if it means taking more than they can handle.

Even with the similarities, though, they can still parallel each other very well. For example, how Hiyori is extremely worried about his own reputation and the way others view him, wanting to be loved by others above anything else to the point this is one of the main reasons as to why he chose to become an idol, versus Rinne's own viewpoint of mostly not caring what others have to say about him, doing things his own way no matter what other people think of it like how he took the blame all to himself, also protecting the other Crazy:B members by doing so.

Niki and Ibara are friends, sure, and they do look different enough at a first glance but there's this similarity between them deep down. Sure, both of their personalities are very different! Niki is outgoing and sociable, trusts almost anyone and enjoys to help others, seen with Ibara himself when Niki wants to cook to him after learning his favorite "food" are supplements, meanwhile Ibara may appear sociable and upbeat like Niki at a first glance, he's cunning, prefering to work on his own rather than trust others with his own deals because of his own mistrust on others... And even so, they still became friends to the point he's comfortable with teasing Niki or allow him to take jobs on cafes besides just the idol work.

However, both of them have this underlying horrible self esteem for one reason or another. Even if both play it off as jokes or off-comments, it's still very present on both of them: With Ibara's comments on how he's basically Nagisa's shadow or the lowest of the low, or Niki undermining himself and his abilities as "dumb" or "a decent chef". They simply see those around and important to them as more than what they are, as if they're assets to help the closest ones to achieve greater: This is also specially noticeable with their relationships to Nagisa (see the same shadow comment from above) or with how Niki basically only became an idol because of Rinne. Even if both have "no intention of getting big/having the spotlight", Ibara still feels a hidden craving for it while Niki gets it thanks to Crazy:B. And even with those thoughts, both still try their best at practice so they can help their unit move forward: Because they both care a lot about their units.

Even if Niki is more open with his expression of how much he cares and Ibara hides it more, with Hiyori being the one who does that, both are connected to their unit in a way special to them. Their units were the closest thing they had to friends or a "family" after a long time, with Ibara's military past and Niki's father incident which caused him to eventually take Rinne in. Both of them are people who have finally found a place where they somewhat belong, a place where people care back for them just as much as they care. It's even noticeable with how it's stated Ibara sometimes cooks for Eden and they all eat together, when I don't even think you have to mention Niki very much does the same to Crazy:B from time to time.

Finally, HiMERU and Jun, aka what I think are honestly the most similar ones? Somewhat? And for this to fit even better I think it's nice to consider both Kaname and current HiMERU on this. Both Kaname and Jun were Non-Special students in Reimei and it's known they were somewhat of friends. Both also had their own savior in Reimei, the ones who brought them away into spotlight: Tatsumi and Hiyori, respectively. In a way, both were saved by the light, Kaname through Tatsumi's holy light and Jun by Hiyori's sun. As if given a second chance, they chose to stay together with their savior, performing by their side for as long as they could... Which wasn't long for Kaname and Tatsumi, but it still holds true for Eve.

And then, current HiMERU and Jun, who are WAY closer personality-wise than Kaname and Jun were. Both play into this calm and polite idols when in public, keeping a good appearance even if it sometimes may not be fit of Eden or Crazy:B, while sometimes acting like the total opposite when with their own units or closer people, Jun being sarcastic and HiMERU being blunt, with both also being rude on occasion. Both are passionate and assured on what they do, even if they hit a slump sometime, they have confidence on their jobs as idols.

The way they care for their unit members is also very similar - while yes, it can be noted that they care for them, both can also be strict when necessary (which is more often than not for HiMERU), specially with Rinne and Hiyori, being the grounding forces to their impulsivity.

Both Kaname and current HiMERU can work as a parallel to Jun - it depends exactly on what you're looking for, yes, but in a way both of them work well for Jun. It's also interesting to note how it's implied that, in the past, Jun was indeed closer to Kaname, but currently as he's grown he's also closer to HiMERU.

I just think their similarities and parallels are honestly quite entertaining and neat

#enstars #eden #crazy:b #nagisa ran #hiyori tomoe #ibara saegusa #jun sazanami #rinne amagi #niki shiina #himeru #kohaku oukawa #my first thought on this was like. 'nagisa and kohaku - autism. hiyori and rinne - horny. ibara and niki - pathetic losers.#jun and himeru - pheromones.' and yeah im right but also i ended thinking too much about it and now i have feelinfs #i think theyre silly.#also its 2 am hey #chii talks #meta (?) tag

46 notes · View notes

horrorsummerromance · 2 years

Note

Can I ask you something? If Bls fetishize gay men, is there really anyway to ethically consume any series at all?

hiiii anon!!!!

oh good question.

ok. so. i think recent bl's, i'd say .... from 2020-ish, maybe even 2018/2019 tbh, have taken that step forward where, they're tryna move away from blantant fetishising, and become more progressive, not just towards gay men, but the asian queer community in general, and anyone who identifies themselves within that community.

that being said, of course there will be instances where queer asian people, including queer asian men, will be fetishised.

i think the biggest example in terms of progression has been in the sheer amount different genres of asian queer shows that are produced, and in addition to that, in the increasing number of people who both behind the cameras and in front of them identify as asian and queer too.

also i feel like the way sex is used in asian queer shows has shifted. yes, of course, there are still instances of rape/non-con/dub-con, but there was a time when sex was Literally Only used within asian queer shows For That Only. now? sex is used to explore dynamics, explore feelings, progress a story, progress a relationship. its treated as a character, in a sense, and given some meaning and substance. also, that includes the whole top/bottom discourse too. like. i think there's just more looseness and freedom to it now? like. yeah, some characters LIKE bottoming, some LIKE topping, some ARE versatile! for example, i call pete from kinnporsche a pillow princess ALL the time, and thats bc he IS. thats with no malice or rudeness or any intent to fetishise him as being all weak and delicate, usually the traits that are associated with "being a bottom", bc he isnt weak or delicate! but during sex, he LIKES being the taker, he likes receiving, and that plays a huuuuge part in his character's development later on in the show.

i'd also say "coming out stories" have recently not been .... THAT heavily used, within recent shows that i have watched? and thats not to say that coming out stories arent important! of course they are. or there's a lesser case of characters having internalised homophobia, filled with shame and self-loathing bc they realise they're queer, in recent shows i have watched. thats not to say they dont question who they are, they do, but they dont hate themselves for being queer. its more a case of exploration. and its so nice to see that for a change? asian queer characters being gentle on themselves, learning to treat themselves with patience and time to navigate their identity. and its so nice to also see asian queer characters for a change who are just, queer! loud and queer!

what i'm trying to say is that they are all stories at the end of the day. and all forms of story telling, from healthy to toxic, from stories of kids in school to students in uni to working adults, from coming out stories to stories that talk about sparking a political revolution, stories that are coming of age or a slice of life, stories that span all types of backgrounds and time periods, should be able to be told. and sometimes they'll have characters that are already so comfortably queer in their own skin and some that aren't, and there'll be some stories that are more tame in terms of how physical they are and like to explore the more emotional nuances of the story and some that like to explore sex in a multitude of ways. there's really no right or wrong in terms of wanting to set out a story and choosing which way to tell it. the scope is so huge.

now. like i said. not every asian queer piece of media will be faultless, and there will be instances of fetishisation. but i also want to look at how far we've come! i've been around watching asian queer media since ... god .... i cant even remember how long, its been that long, and ive seen how far we've come. as an asian queer person myself, it gives me so much pride and joy in seeing that!

and i think, the older and more mature i have gotten, my mindset has changed a lot. now, i like to see stories and media as a whole thing. that, yes, there will be faults and its not going to be perfect. but as someone who can compartmentalise, as a consumer, as an audience member, as an asian queer person, as someone who is watching this as a form of escapism, i'll recognise the faults and the things i'm not fond of, or that dont sit right with me, and put them to one side, and still allow myself to enjoy the rest of the story/media. otherwise, i'll never be able to enjoy anything ever again, if i scrutinise every single little thing and every little detail ethically. like i said, not everything will sit right with me, but i can work with that and say "yeah i didnt like that narrative choice" and put it to a side, and move on. and if its reeeeeeally bugging me, i'll just drop the show. now, some people like doing that (scrutinising every little detail through ethical lenses) and thats their choice in how they view media. but ig i'm not like that? and i can let myself enjoy asian queer stories that are trying to say something, to convey something, as a bigger picture.

and yeah, there will be instances where queer characters in asian media will get fetishised, there will be the whole "husband and wife" and "girls on campus stalking a queer couple" etc etc etc. but i can look at all that and say to myself, yeah, work needs to be done here, whilst also enjoying the rest of the show and what its trying to convey or tell.

so yeah, i do think you can, if as a consumer, you can appreciate the bigger picture whilst also understanding that we've still got some room for progress.

#faiza answers

42 notes · View notes

lilicohirukoma · 1 year

Text

YOU S4 EP2 LIVEBLOG

Here we go again

- I wouldn’t be too married to the idea its one of the new people here, could always be someone from your past (maybe the guy the Quinn’s send)

- Is this season gonna be Joe’s descend into madness/paranoia? I kinda dig that

- Oh wait an actual murder mystery party? Even more fun!

- But I still don’t get why they want him around so much, like he isnt rich so that can’t be a reason

- YOU KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT ABOUT WHODUNNITS MR GOLDBERG

- But then why would she conviently leave a voice mail about him being dead right in front of you?

- Shit okay he made that deduction too I’m gonna go cry now

- Kate’s being sussed out so I feel like its def not her and she might even die

- Ah yes hello Nadia you still exist, how convenient you love the mystery genre

- WHY ARE YOU CALLING ABOUT THIS IN A PUBLIC AREA IDIOT???? GO HOME AND THEN CALL how has Joe never been caught oh my god

- Don’t like being stalked huh Joe

- Delete the app/destroy your phone, clearly they want a game and if you try to deny it they’ll have to make measures to keep you in it and through those measures you could get closer to their identity

- Lady Phoebe is giving me some Annika vibes I love it

- Now hold on a minute... Phoebe might be a bit more manipulative than she looks

- I know Ralph is Ralph Lauren but who tf is Tom

- Liking the Soo siblings a lot and I think one of them will survive, my bet’s on Sophie

- No Kate’s the red herring move on from her

- Louis XIV for Sun King w Dagger? Makes sense for the rich entitled assholes theme the show is going with (as usual)

- His detective superpower is probably gonna he the fact that he’s a serial killer and can thus think like a murdering stalker

- I feel like we are gonna get more crazy stuff from Gemma and Blessing, I think the characters have more to offer

- When charged with a DUI one moves to London and starts an elite club obviously

- WHAT DID I SAY SUN KING LOUIS XIV BABY, thank god he was one of my biggest history hyperfixations

- How much did they pay Adam’s actor for that scene I got to know

- Hmmm why did that lady want a picture of Joe

- EWWWWWW NFTS GET IT OUT OF MY FACE. Kill Simon for me please

- I dont think exposing a piss kink equals murder and framejob

- Wdym Roald Joe smells of New York, Virginia, Vermont and those kinda places

- Do love this snake skin suit Adam has going on

- Yeah I don’t think it’s him either, he’s weird but that isnt a crime

- Red paint meant to symbolize blood I see whats going on

- And ofc Simon immediatly makes performance art out of it

- Didn’t you literally say to stop helping people? Why are you helping Kate out again fool? (Yes its bc hes in love w her I know)

- He sells NFTs of course he stole the other art works

- Nah, he’s an asshole but too casual and laid back to kill someone, frame a person and then fuck around on text about it

- Simon’s gonna get killed I can feel it

- So Malcolm was missing a finger and Simon an ear, both of those had jewelry (a ring and an earring) on those parts so that might be something

- Rhys is getting more and more suspicious but that might also be on purpose

- Kate is just reserved man, not every good act should be for public display

- I love Nadia, if she dies I’m gonna be so mildly disappointed

- OH FUCK YES LETS GOOO GET HIS ASS

#you season 4 #netflix you #you

3 notes · View notes

dansedan · 4 years

Text

I wrote a christmas fic but it's ANGSTY and a little weird and I'm not sure if I did the pov too weird but I am TRYING TO CONVEY A THING that FEELS IMPORTANT TO ME AND THE CHARACTER so I do STUPID THINGS

Lupita au Angel Eyes childhood bullshit

Meat, and wine, and garlic cloves- and did they have brandy in the cellar somewhere? Fennel in the garden? The melody to the young woman's swift percussion on the pen and bedframe, the wrought iron dark and errant.

The aunt, too pale, too pregnant, on the bed said "you're an angel."

And the young woman looked up from her list, down at those dark brown honest eyes, cow's eyes, cow's lashes, cow's bulk on her body like one couldn't bear to look at. Cattle-helpless on the bed.

And the young woman looked down and asked efficiently to see the husband, to ask to buy the wine and brandy for her, for the stew that night.

Here and there another little humor in the waiting, watching- a small sign of that distant, threatening supremacy of one's own haunted body, of theirs both. A fronte praecipitium. The ever-there awareness of the stockings and the silver cross and ribbon and of the rise-and-falling swelling underneath the young aunt's blanket- too young, too close, too real and too wholehearted.

And then one's exit, pursued by an interlude of pilfering tobacco.

One had hoped the air in Almería would've been a fraction clearer than LA- and outside it was somewhat better than home and all its instancy- but it no longer carried the freedom felt years ago, the quiet dark existing just for them, for one and one young, pale aunt only a moment older. For one pale aunt once tanned, and bright and brash and bold. And boyish.

As for small comforts: well, at least tobacco tastes the same.

Tastes like one night till Christmas. One night before the young woman goes back to Sevilla, to the old family house and newly-arriving parents, a midnight mass and a morning dinner and all related niceties. One's yearly game of tablas reales with the old, sensible uncle and his inevitable answers and advice. Poor, overburdened sleep.

For now though, there were groceries, tobacco and the dessert air around one. Touching the young woman's skin. The near-at-hand priority of fresh pain to push down, the biting cold almost kind enough to kiss, and the young woman so far from oneself that god knows who could save her.

#my fic #my writing #yes the aunt n uncle are mortimer and sister I am just going full ham on the crossover thing i suppose #mortimer is the gay uncle who gets overly attached to the next gen's gay cousin pass it on #blondie is my dysphoria dumping grounds angel is my depersonalization dumping grounds we r trans and sad and confused all the time yayyy #blondie is like v typical i always knew shit angel is like 'im sure everyone else just. doesnt exist outside of their head also #and then hes like 'oh. people usually have... a sense of identity that isnt a floating conceptual mass and actually connects to their body?#lupita au

11 notes · View notes

kafkaguy · 2 years

Note

pls elaborate on honey this mirror.... the title is increediblyy transgender yeag but im not immediately seeing it in the rest ... u could convince me though i think

Ok so im not going to post a voice note cos i sound literally insane i dont know if i sound any saner now that ive typed it all out but like. HOPEFULLY THIS MAKES SENSE you asked for me to convince you so heres a whole ass mini essay sorry do u still think im hot. this got so long kill me now. ENJOY <33

To preface this: in almost all the songs that i think are about transgenderism, the struggle with gender and identity is often portrayed as a struggle in a relationship with a lover (usually a female lover), which is pretty apparent in drowning lessons + the demolovers in three cheers for sweet revenge, and in this song. At least in my opinion.

so honey this mirror isnt big enough, on a surface level is about a toxic/failing relationship. but like i said i feel like this “other side” of gerard, or of i guess the narrator/singer, the feminine side, the “girl within” is often depicted as a lover or a companion of some sort. the title of this song is what gives it away for me because if u ignore the title then obviously the song is just about a relationship, but because its called honey this mirror isnt big enough for the two of us it feels like gerard is just singing to themself. Its not about any relationship, its about gerards relationship with HIMSELF, or with this other side of him, this other half (the woman in the demolition lovers, the victim in drowning lessons).

Me and ryan did a LOT of trans readings of mcr songs yesterday and the day before, and to like put it down to its essentials: a lot of the songs on bullets + revenge have this idea that theres this “girl” that gerard/the narrator wants to be or is somehow on the inside, and hes scared of her or he sees her as something he must kill or repress. at least at the beginning. which is why in drowning lessons i think the “she” that he kills is himself, and i think this is then repeated in honey this mirror isnt big enough, but instead of it being a murder, hes just trying to break up with her.

ryan put it quite well in this discord message they sent me: “he's pushing the girl out of his mind (out of the mirror)” “like im breaking up with you. we're over. i dont care how much you cry, i dont care how much i mean to you, this time i mean it. we're not doing this again (and then she comes back because she always, always, always comes back)”

honey this mirror really reflects a problem that i think a lot of trans people struggle with at first, which is: if i embrace this side of me, if i come out, it could ruin my relationships with other people. I’ll become a different person, what if they wont love me anymore. so like when gerard says to this “girl” ‘you cant touch my brother / you cant keep my friends’ thats the idea of “shit if im transgender ill lose the people closest to me”, which is depressing but really realistic in that i know ive thought like that a lot in the past. I think he gets past this and thats shown in danger days and hesitant alien (gerards solo album) but i wont go into that now lol.

and then right after that they sing “we’re not working out / this time i mean it / never mind the times ive seen it’, ‘it’ being the times they HAVE worked out. But in this song its like gerard is lying to themself, theyre ignoring the times this “relationship” has made them happy cos theyre letting fear and self hatred drown out the positive emotions this “girl” this “lover” has created in them.

Then the pinnacle to this interpretation is the lyrics ‘well i find it hard to stay / with the words you say / oh baby let me in’. Thats the girl, thats gerards reflection saying ‘let me in’ like: embrace me love me you need me dont let me go dont do this to me dont do this to yourself, which gerard ignores because hes determined to end it. but because the outro is a repeat of ‘oh baby let me in’ i think this is what ryan meant with “she always always always comes back”, just like in drowning lessons “all the times ive killed you”: ive killed you so many times but you come back every time, ive broken up with you so many times but in the end i always let you back in. like this is a constant internal struggle that if you only listen to bullets and revenge seems to have a bad ending, but it actually has a happy ending because eventually gerard/the narrator embraces this woman, this other half, and doesnt regret it.

The end thank you for coming to my ted talk i hope i got my point across. It might be a bit of a stretch but i definitely stand by this interpretation godbles

#i read through everything i wrote like 8 times and still dont know if this makes sense but whatever fuck it we ball. send post #mcr #gerry 🐑#📬

26 notes · View notes

just-a-belgian-girl · 2 years

Note

39, 44, 49?

39. What’s one skill they wish they had?

Arveene - talking to people

Bertrand - holding his tongue better lol

Amastacia - to defend herself

Helja - to lie, she really can't but with the stuff Bertrand and Thorin get themselves into, it would really come in handy-

Thorin - to cook, the dude can't cook to save his life 😂

Adran - to act interested even if he's really not (boy are there many of those moments-)

44. Does this person try their best to be honest or are they not above lying to get their way?

Alright, Bertrand is an expert liar. The man may look innocent enough, but do think twice about what he tells you because if he doesnt know you well, chances are high he'll introduce himself as Barnaby and weave a whole new identity for himself while you're none the wiser. Overall he prefers to be honest, but he's learned its better to be safe than sorry among people he doesnt fully trust.

Then we have Helja. She is extremely honest because... well, she can't lie. Everyone always knows when she isnt telling the truth, so at this point she doesnt even try anymore.

The rest are generally truthful, unless in a dire situation, but that rarely happens.

49. Do they think about what they wear or do they throw on whatever they find first?

Adran and Amastacia don't have to think about what to wear; as a high ranking noble son and a princess, the choice of what they will wear that day is made for them.

Bertrand only owns like, two pairs of pants, three shirts, a set of finer clothes, a coat and a hat, (he likes traveling light) so there's not much choice in what to wear. It depends mainly on what he'll do that day, but usually he just wears whatever shirt is clean

Arveene likes to make sure what she's wearing looks acceptable, but other than that she doesn't pay too much attention to it

As for Thorin... oh god, Helja is losing her patience with this man's sense of fashion 😂 he just doesnt understand the importance of how his clothing looks... he's lucky to have Helja around to dress him lol

Like Arveene, Helja doesnt pay that much attention to her clothing; presentable is good enough for her

#shayna replies #shayna's ocs #phoebe 💕

2 notes · View notes

beautifuldarkmind · 3 years

Note

tw // s*lf harm, su*cidal ideation (sorry)

Hey, it’s the creepy NHS anon here.

Thank you for responding to my ask! I’m sorry you had such a rough time getting a diagnosis. You shouldn’t have had to go through all of that. Honestly it sucks that the NHS is so reluctant to diagnose anything mental health related.

When I was 14 I thought I had depression and anxiety. I finally convinced my mum to take me to the doctors when I was 16. The doctor was super nice. She tested my thyroid function just to make sure nothing else was causing my feelings, then referred me to CAMHS. That was…an interesting experience. I remember asking my counsellor to diagnose me, but then at the next session she said she couldn’t, that it “wouldn’t be helpful” because I was still growing. Now that I think about it, one of the days I was at school and during a class I was furious for some reason. I even said to a classmate that I was willing to fight anyone who got in my way. Despite my mum disagreeing with me, I cancelled my appointment that day. (My mum was worried they’d stop my sessions all together if I cancelled, but they didn’t.)

Fast toward to recent years and I’ve been on and off attempting to get a diagnosis. Last year (so when I was about 18) I asked to be referred to the autism clinic, and thankfully the GP accepted, but the clinic is still closed and even when it’s open I’ll still have to wait, possibly several years. Then I made another appointment (different GP) to be referred to a psychiatrist. She refused, saying that GPs are trained to deal with mental health issues. I brought up OCD, so she asked where I got my information from. When I told her I researched it online, she just brushed it off and then did the typical depression/anxiety test and she said both were severe, then said “take some drugs” (which is didn’t because I didn’t trust taking drugs prescribed by someone who did a 3 minute yes/no type quiz without actually fully exploring my issues).

I spoke to a different GP just over a month ago to get a fit note for my Universal Credit. It was supposed to just be to make adjustments to what I was supposed to do, but he didn’t ask what the note was for, so he marked unfit for work. Which is great because that’s secretly what I wanted but feared being judged by people around me for thinking I needed that (particularly my parents). I mentioned that I thought I could have OCD and CPTSD, and he didn’t deny it but he simply said CBT helps for both. He then asked if I was currently doing CBT and I said I’d done it before but I quit. (That’s a whole other story but tldr I really don’t think it was for me, or at least the “therapist” wasn’t.) He said he would send a self referral link.

Fast forward to a few days ago and I had another appointment with him to discuss my fit note (because it only lasts for a month and you have to go back to renew it, which sucks). He asked if I had referred myself to CBT and I said I hadn’t yet because I didn’t want to, and he said “please do that for me” in a somewhat stern voice. I then brought up BPD and I think he said he would refer me? Honestly I was a bit overwhelmed because he called 40 mins early and I was in the car with my dad, so I was super weary of him asking questions about what I was saying to the doctor (but he didn’t). He then brought up PD support groups, which I’m considering doing, but you have to call up the place and I literally hate phone calls. Oh, speaking of which, all the appointments from the autism one onwards were all on the phone, so not only was I struggling to process what they were saying to me most of the time, but I was also so anxious that I couldn’t articulate my feelings properly. :)

Anyways, I am 20 now, which I only mention because I feel the same as what you mentioned. My brother is married, my childhood crush is married, my friend who I introduced to my friend group who then proceeded to discard me is getting married. Everyone seems to know exactly what they’re doing. They all have friends. But not me. I haven’t had friends since I was 14, and even then I don’t think that friend group was entirely wholesome. They made me feel like an outcast, like I was weird, that I needed to be more like them and not be like me. Which has probably contributed to me having a very vague sense of identity. And I feel like I’m still 14 and yet everyone is expecting me to behave like an adult. I’m supposed to know what I’m doing with my life even tho I literally cried in the shop when I was pressured to choose between 2 pizzas.

I have no support system. My own parents seem very dismissive of my problems, equating everything to social anxiety. When I’m stressed out of mind to the point of feeling suicidal, my parents say “that’s just life”, which…well, feeds into the feelings. For years I’ve felt stressed. Then if I’m not stressed I feel absolutely nothing. And if I’m not feeling empty I am angry, sometimes for no reason. And if I’m not angry, I am curled in a ball trying to bottle up the urge to self harm and batting away suicidal thoughts.

It’s like I have a huge chain pulling me down underwater and everyone else is in the beach drinking cocktails or something. Sometimes I thrash and try to get people to notice, but people think I’m just having fun. Other days I just feel like letting the chain pull me down.

Please forgive me for rambling and probably not having a very consistent train of thought in this post. I have a tendency to blab on about my “problems” (if they even are that), I guess as a way to connect? Idk. This post makes no sense.

I hope you’re having a good day. <3

- 🌸✨ (in case I send another ask again, but I’ll try not to because I don’t wanna bother you)

So sorry you're going through something similar. My GP sounded exactly how yours was, the typical anxiety/depression test and then just throwing those at you.. they dont seem to be trained in diagnosing and they dont want to hear anything more either. It's honestly almost impossible getting a diagnosis through them, the system here is really messed up... its just disappointing and seems to be failing so many people including you.

It does sound like you're going through a hard time, it's not nice especially when you feel a loss of self identity, you dont even know who you are and just feel lost in life. I think that was definitely the main point of realising something was up.. I had a VERY distorted view of myself and others around me and that was why I'd often self sabotage everything and then I'd feel so empty and angry at the world and just explode...

If you can go privately then do so, therapists are not able to diagnose and they will usually tell you 'we don't like to label' but even without a diagnosis you can still see if you can access DBT therapy. Amazon also has lots of DBT workbooks that I've used and its helped me to really understand myself!

If you often feel invalidated by your parents then that is known to cause BPD or borderline traits, especially if you've been suffering with mental illness in childhood and they tried to claim that it was nothing....you mentioned anxiety and I was told the approach my parents may have took to my severe anxiety is what brought on many of my symptoms of BPD. You start to feel ashamed of yourself for feeling that way because your caregivers make it seem like the issue isnt important and you feel as if your feelings dont matter also because that is how you have been made to feel.

I'm not saying this is definitely the cause but in my case I was told that the constant feeling of invalidation may be why I have such a warped idea of myself and why I cannot regulate my emotions. I was never told HOW to regulate or shown how to, just told to ignore my emotions and now I dont know how to deal with them😀

but yeah I'd really recommend taking a look at some of those dbt books online or reading more into it so you have a better understanding of yourself. You've already taken the first step and that's identifying that something may be wrong so you are self aware and clearly want to change for the better 💕

I hope everything works out for you, it's not nice feeling this way but you've got this 🥺🙌

#ask #bpd #borderline personality disorder #tw

2 notes · View notes

river-bottom-nightmare · 4 years

Note

If you’d like to, I’d love a fic rec. I like all the fandoms in your bio so I’d be interested in whatever you want to talk about. Thanks!!

Someone actually sent me the ask I’ve been waiting for oh my god. Anon. You are an incredible person and I love you. Okay so. If we were doing spn recs, this list would be over 300 fics long. If we did Marvel, I’d have to explain my stance on the current comics, and say why I like some parts of the MCU and why I dislike others. For Shadowhunters, and I say this sheepishly, I just posted a fic on my ao3. If you’re interested, please check it out! And I have been on a DC binge lately...so let’s do DC!

Now keep in mind I have so so many fics, so these are just my top favourites. They’re also pretty general and all over the place, so if you want a rec list for a specific ship or gen relationship or fandom, just let me know! I’d be more than happy to write one.

1. Yesterday’s Voices by @lemonadegarden

While trying to take down a drug cartel that deals with memory altering drugs, things go awry, and Batman wakes up with no recollection of the last five years. As a result, his family must now race against time to find the antidote, while also having to deal with a Bruce who still thinks Jason is Robin. A Bruce who doesn't recognise most of them. A Bruce far less jaded and cynical than the one they're used to. A Bruce who still cares.

Gen. 49,000 words. This fic was incredibly sweet with just the right touch of angst. Featuring a lot of Bruce being a dad, Jason and the rest of the batfam making amends. The author has impeccable dialogue and conveys the emotions of the characters beautifully. The pacing is a bit off, though, and the beginning seems rushed while the heavy emotional parts seem long and drawn out. Overall, a pretty satisfying read with a happy ending.

2. The Mystery of the Superboy Shirts by Aviatricks

The thing is, Tim is a detective, first and foremost. And like most detectives, sometimes he just can’t let things go. (Or, how Tim acquires several hundred Superboy t-shirts)

Tim/Kon. 4,000 words. I’m sure this fic has been recced a thousand times in a thousand different lists, but there is no way I can leave it out. Good old fashioned fluff and humor. It’s light and happy and leaves you with a laugh at the end. If you’re in the mood for a oneshot full of smiles and core four fluff (and really, who isnt?) then this fic is a go-to!

3. Every Fiber of My Being by @lanestreets (I am so sorry if this is the wrong url. The one on ao3 didn’t work so I had to do some digging.)

As much as Dick and his siblings have argued, Bruce has never budged on his "Keeping Secrets Policy". There's not a person alive outside of the family that knows the secret identity of any of the Bats. Not even Dick's boyfriend. Dick understands the need for some secrets, knows that keeping their identities safe keeps them and their loved ones safe, but when he takes up the cowl, team dynamics aren't the only things that begin to change.

Birdflash. 21,000 words. This has got to be my most favourite birdflash fic of all time. Partly because it’s based off Dick and Wally from the comics (their personalities are particularly Titans-esque, but I’m not 100% sure) rather than from Young Justice. It’s mainly Dick-centered, showcasing his relationships with Wally but also with the rest of his family. If you’re not sure of what exactly happened with Bruce being lost in time and Dick becoming Batman, I would brush up on that first, because this fic won’t make much sense without it. It takes you on a whirlwind of feels, and the frantic, gradually quickening pace of the prose matches the plot of the fic, and I just - ah! I would definitely give this fic a read!

4. Declensions by @dustorange

“My father,” Dick says, “worked the rope. It cut him. His hands were never clean.”

Gen. 13,500 words. Dick-centric. This fic is absolutely gorgeous and it needs more love. The reason I think it’s so incredible is because it takes a deep dive into Dick’s Romani heritage which is something that I adore DC did but hate the way the executed it. But still, representation is representation, and when you have fics like these to show what Dick being Romani would actually reflect, it’s hard to complain. Beautifully written, and the overt racism and difficulty fitting in really hits home, even for someone who’s experienced it firsthand. A little bit of the prose is jumbled and hard to follow, but that may be an artistic choice reflecting Dick’s state of mind during the fic. Read this if you want to realize some things you’ve never thought of before.

5. Those Who Wait by @last01standing

The best way to socialize an angry assassin boy: Set up a playdate with someone functionally invulnerable. [Jon and Damian through the years. Reverse!Robins universe. Stands alone.]

Damijon. 11,000 words. I’m not usually a fan of reverse robins, but I liked this one because it focused on the way Damian and Jon’s relationship grew through the years. It also doesn’t just switch Damian and Dick’s names while keeping their personalities the same, or have Damian become a harsh, uncaring person who can barely be classified as an older brother, both of which I’ve seen in these types of fics and I hate. Damian’s character development is extremely well done and actually realistic, so kudos for that. Jon is written as an actual character with feelings and motivation, rather than a “smol little bean” whose entire personality is “uwu.” While it can be funny in incorrect quotes and humor, it doesn’t do well for depth, and I like how this fic explored Jon’s human side. All in all, an interesting read, almost to the point of a character study. Also the shipping stuff with the eventual happy ending is cute too.

6. In The Game by WithTheKeyIsKing

Everyone knows that if you want Don Bruce Wayne to hear you out, there are a few people you have to talk to first. (And frankly, his sons can be just as terrifying.)

Gen. 4,000 words. Part 1 of a series. Once again, I love this for the way the characters are explored. Each member of the family’s individual personalities are examined, then taken and twisted just slightly to the left, leaving you breathless reading a fic that actually seems 100% plausible. The second person in the first fic is a bit off-putting at first, until you reach the end and realize what the author was setting up for. While not a fic I like to read as an alternate way of imagining canon, this is a cool idea worth a visit.

7. Safe and Sound by @kingburu

Post-Endgame, Nightwing finds Kid Flash at Mount Justice.

Birdflash. 12,000 words. I have literally created a moodboard for this fic, that’s how much I loved it. Now, I’ll be the first person to say I’m not a fan of Young Justice. While it set up a good premise, the characters are introduced and gone too fast for us to actually care, and the show is just different enough from canon comics to seriously bother me. But, if there’s one thing I truly loved, it was Dick and Wally’s easy friendship in Season 1. It was like the ultimate best friends to lovers. However, apparently DC can’t ever let me or Wally be happy because Endgame happens and I die a little inside. This fic is a self indulgent little oneshot of Wally accidentally time travelling to the future, after he died, and coming to terms with the fact that he loves his best friend and he left him all alone. Heartbreakingly sad, this takes you on a journey through Wally’s emotional mindset. It does not have a happy ending, and leaves you feeling bittersweet in all the right ways.

All right, those are seven of the best DC fics there are, at least in my book. Once again, these are just general. If you want a specific pairing or fandom, just let me know. Ask and ye shall receive. Also, if you want to scream one of the fics from the list you read, or any other fic or headcanon, just message me. I’m literally always down to talk.

Hope you like the list, anon. Happy reading!

43 notes · View notes

hitsuackerman · 4 years

Text

Unpredictable (Overhaul x Reader) pt. 2

a/n: I AM GARBAGE FOR THIS MAN. HE IS VILE AND MERCILESS BUT IF HE ISNT CRAZY... HES A CLASSY AND WELL-SPOKEN BIRD BOY. ehem on with the second part ehem

warnings: cursing

Links: part 1, part 3

Masterlist to my other fics: here :)

The night was now settled and you were locked in your room. Papers and folders all spread out on your desk and bed. If you were to venture into this case, you would have to know the details you had missed out on.

By now, your butt was aching and so did your back. Glancing at the other piles of folders, you counted how many cases you were working on at the same time. If there was one thing the chief loved to give you, it was more work than you could finish.

As of the moment, you were in charge of 9 other cases. Some related to large scale companies and others identity frauds. Though the cases were now generic for the 6 years you’d been working with the force, it was and will always be draining.

This mission with Overhaul felt like a breath of fresh air. The risks presented here were much higher compared to normal but you were more than prepared, at least you hoped you were. Truth be told, this wouldn’t be the first time you teamed up with a villain. That was your secret as to why you moved up so fast. Every now and then, you would propose a compromisation and in turn they would help you catch your target. You did, however, avoid this as much as possible.

Ruffling your hair, you gathered the mess and prepared for Gei’s arrival.

When he did arrive, the solemnity of your apartment faded. And you did not mind one bit.

“BABY GIRL!” He twirled his neon pink purse in the air as he entered himself into your apartment. His other hand carried the necessities for the night. “Okay. I got the food and the booze. I also bought my silk pajamas we use for occasions like this.”

“Mine are ready. Don’t worry.” You giggled at the sight of a toned man unloading the contents of the bag with a pinky up. “I also prepared the movies we could watch for tonight. AND, I already informed Nao to not call me for the rest of the night.”

“Okay, alright, mhmm. Imma go change into my silkies and you do you.” He said as he trotted towards the guest room. When the door closed, you began to prepare the dinner you had planned for the both of you.

Gei was never a picky eater but it was always a challenge to make sure he was well fed. Compared to you, his eating habits were much more constant. Healthier even since he usually counted his calories because he wanted to keep his waist ‘snatched’. He had told you beforehand that he was in the mood for some chicken. Luckily, you had the ingredients for grilled bruschetta chicken.

Prepping everything, you began to heat your tiny grill and sliced the tomatoes and garlic. The sound of the chopping eventually replaced with the speakers blasting Todrick Hall. Shaking your head with amusement, you went about with the preparations while your friend arranged the sofa.

Not long after, dinner was now ready and both of you were now seated at the dining table. Chatting about whatever came to your heads. A few gossips of heroes here and there but mostly about your work and his. Sip by sip, the wine bottle slowly emptied. Gei always knew the best wines out there. You would always praise him and he would merely pout his lips and wiggle his brows.

Stomachs full, Gei demanded he do the dishes while you wait for him at the sofa. It had been quite some time since you took the time off. Stretching your joints, you gathered your hair into a messy bun and dusted off imaginary dust on your silk pajamas. Taking some bowls from underneath the coffee table, you filled them up with chips and placed the wine inside the chiller. When everything seemed ready, you flopped back onto the sofa and turned the TV on.

A knock on your door caused you to jump a bit. Looking at the clock, it was now 9pm. Grabbing your phone, there were no messages or missed calls. You also didn’t recall ordering anything this week. Walking towards the door, you took a look at Gei who was finishing up the last of the plates.

Looking through the peephole, you let out a rather loud gasp.

“Oh fuck no.” You took a step backward and ran towards the kitchen. Grabbing Gei by his wrist, you pulled him out of his trance and dragged him to the living room. Practically throwing him to the sofa, he stared at you with wide eyes.

“Boo, I know your as virgin as the spinster next door but I am a gay man and I do not intend on taking you tonight.” He commented.

“He’s here.”

Another knock filled the room. It was still soft but a bit louder than before.

“Girl?! Did you call in Magic Mike?!” He began to bounce up and down while fanning himself.

“More like Germaphobe Gus.” You motioned for him to stay on the couch and remain quiet. Walking towards the door once more, you slowly opened it only to be met with the bird mask again. The green jacket and purple fur did not compliment his eyes. “What can I do, Overhaul? You could’ve dropped me a message you know.”

“I have something to discuss with you.” His eyes travelled behind you and back at you. “May I come in? Or do I have to usher myself?”

Stuttering a response, you grunted and moved to the side. The towering man slowly made his way in. Taking in the rather luxurious decorating your small hallway had to offer. Waiting for you to take the lead, you led him to the living room. When your eyes met with Gei, you signalled him to head on to the guest room.

Understanding what you meant, Gei took his wine glass and cat walked to his room. He stopped in his tracks when he saw the tall man behind you. Making a gesture with his hand, he threw his imaginary wig and winked at you. He was no idiot, though. He knew who it was. For precautions, he left his door 3 inches open.

“That’s why you should’ve told me, Overhaul.” You gestured for him to sit down. When you saw his eye twitching at the spot you pointed to, you let out a sigh and reached for the fur patch behind you. Putting it on the spot, you watched as he stared at the tan material. “That has been newly laundered so I guarantee it’s clean. Now either you develop varicose veins or sit down. I could care less.”

He finally took a seat. This was a rare sight, you had to admit. Overhaul, a class-B villain, sitting on a fur rug while staring at a bottle of wine.

“So what do you have?”

“The boss of the Fukuo Kai will be attending a gala in 3 days time.”

“And you got that how?” You raised a brow and tilted your head.

“None of your business.” He leaned on the sofa and his eyes began to wander every inch your place had to offer. “I’ll have Mimic send the invitation when we get a hold of it. You will be informing your partner about this, right?”

“Yeah. I have to.” You nodded and eyed his bird mask again. “Do you always wear that thing?”

“It’s to block the horrid air the world has to offer.” He said in a deadpan voice. You wanted to laugh at his remark but it would probably lead to nothing good. Stifling a giggle, his eyes darted to yours. “Laugh if it pleases you. The world we live in is vile and sick. People have this so-called hero-syndrome to them that makes me want to puke. Tch. To think that quirks come from rats.”

“You do know that’s only a theory, right?” You did not mean to challenge him but he was interesting to talk to, admittedly.

“It’s a theory that disgusts me to the core.” He was about to say something but changed his mind. Instead, he decided to shift the focus to you. “You talk so casually with me. Aren’t you scared? I could send you to oblivion with a single flick of my finger.”

“I guess I’m immune to it?” You answered with a question. “I’ve been with the police force for 6 years now and I’ve had my fair share of villains. You know Kuraim? That dude who thought he could take over Nagoya with his little group?”

“He was annoying. He came into contact with the previous boss and asked for assistance. When he was declined he took out a few of our men.”

“Oh shit, that was your group! I totally forgot about that. But, yeah. He was a nutjob but my team managed to capture him a week after that.”

“Your name wasn’t featured in the news. It was another inspector’s. Why?” His fingers were not linked with each other and his back leaning on the plush throw pillow.

“I’m linked with the Abegawa Tenchu Kai. If my name gets released to the public, those nosy reporters would definitely put two and two together. I prefer to keep it low key though. Less media, the better.”

“I see.” He stood up and bowed. “I must get going. I have disturbed your evening.”

“IT’S FINE BABY BOY!” Gei shouted from the room. Face palming at his remark, you took Overhaul by the end of his jacket. Your index and thumb delicately tugging him towards your door.

His eyes widened when he saw you holding his clothes. But with how clean your apartment was, he brushed it off and let you do things your way. Though, he would have to burn this jacket or dispose of it one way or another. Not noticing you had turned around, his face still had that perplexed yet pissed off look to it.

Realizing that you were invading his personal space, you apologized and let go of the inch of fabric you had held on to.

“You’re surely going to throw that, aren’t you?” You teased. A small smirk forming in the corners of your mouth.

“I just might.” He retorted as he stared with disgust. A thought came to his mind. “Or not.”

Taking his jacket off, you stared at how his broad shoulders moved as he removed the article of clothing. The black dress shirt hugged his toned arms rather well. The pale gray tie around his neck matched his overall appearance pretty well. He had taste, save for the jacket. Unless that jacket had sentimental value so it would make sense why.

Your sight turned black for a second before you were face to face with him. The rather heavy jacket resting on your forearms.

‘Holy hell, his cologne smells divine.’ You cursed yourself for breathing in at the perfect time. Either the wine was hitting you but his scent reminded you of mayoram and geranium. Exotic and expensive.

“Keep it.” You swore he was smirking underneath that mask. “Either that or I overhaul it.”

“For an antisocial person, you sure know how to charm people…” You thought out loud.

“Not really. I’m just putting it to where it belongs.” He opened the door for himself. “The garbage.”

Your jaw dropped and before you could retaliate, he had closed the door. Locking your doors harshly, you went back towards the living room and were met with Gei. One leg resting on the other. The same glass of wine on his hand accompanied with a rather mischievous glint in his gray eyes. Taking a sip, he exaggerated ‘ahh’ after swallowing the beverage.

“You into villains now, booboo?” He teased as he pointed to the same spot Overhaul had sat down on. The way you flopped on the sofa and tossed the jacket on to the arm rest only made him even more curious. “You’re working with Overhaul?”

His tone was serious but you knew he was in full gossip mode. You didn’t mind telling Gei these things though. He knew how to protect himself and your dad also kept tabs on him to make sure he was safe.

“That’s what I wanted to talk about. The mission I’m currently partaking involves that guy you just saw.” You explained. Absentmindedly, you reached for the jacket and began feeling for any sort of recording chips or video cameras. Deeming it safe, you placed it beside you and began to twirl the purple fur. “I get why they're doing this but it just sucks that I have to meddle with the yakuza. It’s none of my business and it puts my job at risk.”

“What does Nao-nao say about all this?”

“He says I’m the only one fit for the job. I’ve caught up on the details they gathered and he makes a point, sadly. My only problem now is the person I have to work with. It’s a miracle in itself I keep my grounds with him.”

“What personality does he have?” He took a sip of his wine and leaned in closer.

“The records I have from a year ago state he’s an antisocial sociopath. I’ve never dealt with a lot of villains who had those. Most of them were just lost or goal driven to a bizarre or lost cause.”

“He was rather smooth when talking to you. He looks clean as well.” He raised an eyebrow and cocked his head. “He’ll surely see you as a challenge, boo.”

“What do you mean?” You reached for your glass and poured it half full.

“If I recall, during your conversation, he asked you if you were intimidated. Scared. The answer you gave him surely bothered him. It would go against his personality if he were the least intrigued by you.” He pointed out.

Gei had a point. If you saw him as an enigma, he probably saw you as a pawn in his game. One way or another, he would surely make a move and try to manipulate you. Though you were aware of the signs of subtle manipulations, Overhaul had a different way of handling things. This meeting with Gei proved right. You needed to move with greater caution.

“BUT!” He snapped. “He looks like a full course meal, am I right? A five Michelin star meal served in only the finest china the world has to offer.”

Speechless at how he had described Overhaul, you shook your head and took a long sip.

“Don’t sip away from me, missy.” He stretched out his leg and poked you with his curled toes. “Don’t think I didn’t see you checkin’ him out. And I bet my plump ass that wasn’t the first time you eyed him…”

“You’re delusional.” You rolled your eyes.

“What does his jacket smell like? He probably wears some expensive ass shit that lasts 24 hours. Those that only have limited stocks to them or costs the rent of this whole unit.” He pushed you a bit with a little more force with his leg. “Don’t lie to me, dollface.”

Hissing at his remark, you slumped your shoulders and folded your legs. Grabbing the throw pillow and using it as a small table.

“Fine. He smells expensive. You’re right.” You broke down and the smug look on his face only told you to expand your answer. “And yes, I may have checked him out when I went to their headquarters to finalize the plan.”

“And what are you going to do with that jacket of his?” He stretched out his hand and you gave it to him. His mouth formed a small ‘o’ at the weight of it. Sniffing it, he let out a humming sound and placed it on his arm rest. Petting the fur as if it were some small animal. “He does smell like a hefty price tag.”

“I’ll probably just store it somewhere. I might need it in the future.”

“True. You will be extra careful now, won’t you?” He was now staring straight into you. Concern showing in his features. Extending a hand to you, you held on to it and he squeezed it. “Let’s say a silent prayer to our savior, Queen Todrick, to keep your virgin ass safe from the man whom we know as Overhaul. Amen~”

Giggling at his antics, you repeated his last words. The rest of the night was spent watching movies and munching on chips. When the time came where it was close to 4am, the lights were now off and both of you were in your respective rooms. The curtains to your window open. Faint hues of yellows, oranges, and reds, filled your room.

Your eyes landed on the top shelf of your closet, his jacket resting peacefully. The strong intoxicating scent still clung to you. Every breath you took, you could smell him on clothes and your shirt. Brushing the incoming fantasies away, you buried your face in your pillow and somehow managed to force yourself to sleep.

Waking up to the scent of bacon and eggs were heavenly. The small headache would surely disappear after a hearty and greasy breakfast early in the morning. Arranging your sheets, you fixed your hair and went to the kitchen.

“Good morning to you.” Gei greeted. His back facing you as he flipped the bacon. “Sleep well?”

“Yeah.” You yawned. “Better than most nights. Thanks for crashing, Gei.”

“Always a pleasure, booboo. I also prepped some egg sandwiches for Nao-nao. You are heading to the precinct right?” He glanced at you over his shoulder. A small smile forming on his lips when he saw your half awake half asleep state. The sun’s rays emphasizing the messy strands on your bed hair.

Another knock echoed through your unit. Groaning as to who it could be, you lazily stood up and walked towards the door. Gei peaking in the corner with a suspicion as to who it was. When you opened the door, you frowned and looked at both sides. There was no one.

A small voice cleared their throat. Looking down, you saw a tiny black creature wearing a bird mask. In his hands was an envelope. He kept his word and really did send an invite.

“The boss sent me out to hand this to you.” He tossed the invitation directly at your face. “Better count yourself lucky he’s following your terms.”

“Send him my thanks.”

“Whatever.” He answered as his small feet took him farther away from your door.

Back in your kitchen, Gei had now set the table and laid out the food. He was scrolling on his phone when you sat across from him. Your fingers busy with the square fancy envelope given to you.

“What’s that?” He asked as he put his phone down and began to place food on each of your plates.

“It’s the invitation to that gala he mentioned last night. He sent out one of his workers to hand over this thing.” Your eyes busy scanning over the program details. Taking a look at the envelope, there was a small card. Dropping it on your palm, you saw how it was an RSVP. Flipping it, a small message with neat penmanship told you to call when you would receive it.

Taking your phone from your pocket, you hit dial on the unknown number that had called you yesterday. Gei was all ears as he chewed on his food.

“I take it you received the invitation?” Overhaul immediately asked when he picked up. “I will let you decide as to who your plus one will be. Feel free to call when you’ve chosen.”

“You’re being awfully cooperative, Overhaul.” You commented.

“I lost at the game and I gave you my word. I trust that you will do your end of the bargain as well. If I recall, you stated that this benefits me more than it does to you. Opportunities like this are rare. Might as well take advantage of it while it’s for the taking.” He answered. “Dress appropriately, (Y/N).”

With that he ended the call. Tossing your phone to your couch, you returned the invitation inside the envelope and began eating.

“So…” Gei nudged your leg from under the table. “Who will be your plus one?”

“I’ll have to talk about this with Tsukauchi first. I don’t fully trust him so we’ll be doing some check ups on the people invited to this gala. But, if it soothes you, I plan on using Overhaul. At least his quirk is useful in case something arises.”

“Yeah. Sure~”

----

if you want to be tagged in part 3 :) feel free to leave a comment :)

#overhaul x reader #chisaki kai x reader #overhaul #chisaki kai #bnha overhaul #mha overhaul #bnha chisaki kai #mha chisaki kai #he is garbage but i love him so much #im simpiing hard yall

99 notes · View notes

zukkatrash · 4 years

Text

im pretty sure nobody wants this content but:

aged up, no bending atla x fallout 4 crossover!!!

(spoilers for some atla and fo4 stuff obviously, and in sukis part i rant abt the ending where ur against the brotherhood, so major spoilers for that too)

lets start with katara

katara is a minuteman, no lets be real shes the goddamn general, preston took one look at her and immediately knew she'd protect the people of the commonwealth with all she had

elder maxon is actually scared of her, which is why he refuses to let her on the prydwen so none of his underlings see him fold under her stare

shes probably the first minuteman that hancock like actually truly respects bc he knows shes 100% abt the ppl and goodneighbors motto is literally "of the people for the people"

katara is a probably a bit conflicted about him at first bc u know hes a bit ruthless for her taste, but she can see his heart's in the right place

she definitely helped marcy long with her grief and turned her anger into smth productive, aka marcy is now probably a high ranking minuteman

sokka

def a railroad agent (i read alchemy, sue me)

him and tinker tom are the best buddies and yes sokka got convinced to drink his weird serum thing, stop bringing it up!!

god just the crazy inventions those two would cook up, they'd probs scare the shit out of the institute

on topic of the institute, theres probably like at least one abduction attempt from them a month but hes not only smart but a badass too

hes also one of the only people dr. amari is actually nice to and will routinely rescue him from irmas relentless flirting

he definitely fanboys with kent collony over the shroud

i feel like deacon would drive him mad, because on one hand he gets the secrecy and that he doesn't want anyone to get too close but also deacs, my man u cant shut everyone out with ur lies

okay now im thinking abt them bonding over their dead gfs and am sad

when he meets nick he has to hold back soooo hard to not ask invasive questions, bc nick is basically a walking insight into the institute, but hes alao a person who sokka respects and really doesn't wanna be an ass to

toph

also with the railroad(but shes a heavy ofc), probably mostly bc shed get more action there

sokka and tinker tom def made her some really cool gadget à la seismic sense so shes still a BEAST

she can also hear a raider ambush/lurking wildlife before anyone else and if shes not with anyone who needs to avoid that kinda stuff she pulls out her trusty missile launcher and makes quick work of her enemies

probably participates in cage matches at the combat zone and raiders shit their pants when they see her

toph is either dating glory or cait or both, cant decide, just badass wlw

or maybe fahrenheit 🤔, i mean the only refrence of tophs type we have is that she mightve had a crush on sokka who is not only strong but smart and u cant tell me fahr isnt smart, she might only have like 5 lines but at least one of them is abt chess which is a common shorthand for intelligence and she is undoubtedly a badass so yes toph and fahr! never thought id think of those two as a ship but here we are haha

zuko

is the silver shroud, you can't change my mind he's a righteous theatre kid ofc he's the shroud

suki

also a minute man, probably kataras second in command

shes the one training the minutemen at the castle

danse tried so desperately to recruit her but suki is too smart to fall for the bos' bullshit

probably plays into his whole spiel tho to get an inside look at the bos and takes them down from the inside

and not by blowing the ship up wtf there are kids on the prydwen what the fuck why cant u get them out beforehand??? why is that the only option to get the bos out of the commonwealth???? they steal poor farmers crops ffs i want them gone! WITHOUT killing innocent children that are being indoctrinated what the fuck

aang

im actually having a really hard time to imagine aang in fo4 bc u know its a biiit violent for a pacifist monk but i really dont wanna just make him a farmer or some boring shit, its just that stuff usually needs killing in some way in fo4

okay nvm i can def picture him on the island mediating that whole conflict between arcadia, the children of the atom and far harbor

oh god aang finding out how dima kept the 'peace' would be a brutal fucking scene, i dont wanna spoil too much if possible but aang would def feel really betrayed by dima

i can see aang arriving at the island and really trying to make everyone understand that dima only wants arcadia to be safe and left alone and i have no idea how he would actually deal with dima once the truth comes out but fuuck, bending or not aang def entered the avatar state there

but just to be clear he still protects arcadia, just bc its built by smn who thinks the ends justify the means doesnt mean that synths dont deserve to live in fucking peace for once

also aang would absolutely adore erikson and his puppies ^^

but back to the commonwealth

aang would for sureee advocate against the mind wipes the railroad makes and try to find other ways to help synths

he probs cannot deal with desdemonia saying that erasing the synths memory and identity is the only way to keep them safe, aang knows what loss means and he wont stand for it

and i can see him do a lot of the actual building in the settlements and helping all those small communities to flourish

now for the crack, as in i dont think this is in character but i thought of it so now yall have to read abt it:

the fire nation is in nuka world, also there is no overboss per se bc except for like 3 lines we know nothing of colter

ozai leads the operators, but also kinda everyone, so basically the overboss

post breakdown, pre redemption azula leads the disciples

zhao leads the pack bc like mason hes an animal and i hate him ^^

gage is dead bc unfortunately ozai isnt dumb, altho ozai was dumb enough to underestimate zuko when he literally told him his plan to join the gaang, but then again gage didnt like colter bc he didnt get shit done and unfortunately ozai does get shit done so gage is probably delighted :(

if anyone actually read this and wants to add on pleaseee do!!!

#atla #avatar #avatar the last airbender #fallout 4 #fo4 #katara #sokka #toph #zuko #suki #aang #atla x fo4 #crossover #dumb thoughts #i wrote almost all of this either high or at 3 am so please feel free to disagree with me haha #also if anyone does end up reblogging this ill probs dm u like right away bc u like two of my fave franchises enough to understand this pos

8 notes · View notes

dailyte · 4 years

Text

It is human nature to gravitate toward people like you!!!

I genuinely hate when people force certain relationships or whatever in the name of not being x-phobic. It's become manipulative at this point honestly. "Oh you wont date me because xyz? That means you're x-phobic". If you pay attention, it usually the reason behind things that makes it problematic.

Ex. 1.:Race

It is not automatically racist if someone prefers to date inside their race. That actually makes sense if that person is proud of their racial identity. However that doesn't take away from anyone who doesnt have a racial preference at all. Something that WOULD be problematic automatically is having a racial preference that is not your own. But not in the sense of "you wont date me hmph" but more so its problematic to fetishize a race. If a black person, for example, preferred to (or only) date(d) Asian people, and you were to ask them why they have that preference you'd only get fetishy reasons. A person's racial identity isnt a fetish. Another problematic preference is specifically preferring NOT to date "yourself". If a Asian person preferred to NOT date other Asian people that's problematic because that signifies that you're not necessarily proud of your identity as an Asian person(disclaimer: the only reason I used Asian people as an example is because I didnt want to double up on black people as an example for problematic ideals). But those are the only 2 things that dont require an explanation to be problematic. However if a white person prefers to date other white people, that's not racist unless their reasoning is racist. Some examples of racist reasonings would be:

Other races are ugly/unattractive/undesirable

My race is superior

I want my bloodline to remain "pure"

And there are probably more idiotic racist/prejudice reasonings. But sometimes it's just a matter of "I'm just more attracted to my own race" or some feel like they can relate to their own race more than others. Like as a black person I may prefer to date other black people because they know what it's like being black in this world and while Asians experience racism too, they will never know what it's like being black. And to be like "well you're problematic or racist because you wont date me" is manipulative and problematic within itself when that person hasnt actually displayed any prejudice/racist/problematic behavior.

Ex. 2.:Sexuality

Some people prefer to date within their sexuality simply out of preference. Of course there are ALWAYS deeper reasons for any preference but sometimes it just goes as deep as simple attraction. For Example, in the Lesbian community there is A LOT of biphobia. I have heard so many lesbians REFUSE(emphasis because it's a choice) to date bisexual women for the following reasons:

"They're confused"

"They're disgusting"

They're promiscuous

They're cheaters

All of these reasons are biphobic and are probably based on some heartbreak they had and are using to fuel their own ignorance. However there are some that are just attracted to other lesbians. The only way to tell the difference is to listen to them tbh a biphobic lesbian usually never fails to show their biphobia. However it is important to remember that preferring to date other lesbians isnt enough to call that person biphobic. Just like As a lesbian, I wouldnt call a bisexual woman lesbophobic is she was attracted to other bisexual people. It would ONLY lesbophobic if she had lesbophobic reasoning behind it. But if I called her lesbophobic for not dating me, a lesbian, then what's stopping society for calling me a misandrist for not being attracted to men? Or a homophobe for not being attracted to gay men?

On top of the fact that in my personal opinion its lesbophobic to make lesbians date anything that has a pulse and a v*gina.

Ex. 3.: beliefs and opinions

It is natural to not want to hang out with people who disagree with you on topics you are passionate about. Now if someone says their favorite color and it's not the same as yours, obviously, you're not going to stop hanging out with that person because your favorite color has little to no bearing on your life. However, if you believe that s*xually ass**lting someone is a very inhumane and shitty thing to do to someone then you're not going to be able to be friends with someone who thinks it's not that big of a deal and participates in victim blaming. What grinds my gears is that people act like they dont do this when they do. The only time you dont is when it's something you dont care about. Like a white cis heterosexual male might not like trump because hes an idiot but also it would stop them from befriending someone who supports trump because the things Trump does might not affect him like that. Example: I'm not transphobic and because I'm actively against transphobia I cannot hang out with someone who is transphobic or someone who hangs out with transphobic people. A step further with a real life example. I was once about to get involved with this girl and beforehand she asked me if I was a Christian because she wouldnt be able to proceed with the relationship if I wasnt. Fast forward I end up breaking up with her because she was being a close minded biphobe and she's like "well it's not fair that you're breaking up with me because of my BELIEFS." But we saw earlier that she does the same thing, the only issue is truly we didnt care about the same things.

The pull away here is that. You're not automatically problematic for having certain preferences, its usually the reasoning behind it that makes you problematic. You should always do introspection to be sure and evaluate why you have certain preferences to make sure you're not just a jerk. Thanks for coming to my tedtalk.

#race #sexuality #politics #beliefs #attraction #problematic #lesbian #bisexuality #biphobia #preferences #manipulative #lesbophobia #rant

4 notes · View notes

archer3-13 · 4 years

Text

FEH Villains Ranked

from best to worst, excluding book 4 cause its still ongoing

lif: genuinely surprised me by being an alfonse with pathos. well he started book 3 as a kinda generic number 2 type, the revelation of his identity as alfonse (though rather obvious at that point) as well as his goal of essentially destroying other worlds as a penance to restore his own is both suitably threatening and tragic. Creating that sense of pathos i mentioned that works so well for him, especially when hes shown to still be a kind person at heart thats been pushed into such horrific actions because of the devastation he had to endure. Especially when you consider that hes carrying the weapon that could kill hel with him which, although kinda lazy that he just has it, is a) a hel of a lot less contrived then anything book 2 pulled off and b) further deepens that sense of pathos when we consider that not only is it a memento of ‘player san’ and presumably everyone else hes lost but that it can also represent, in a way, a symbol of his own failure of will and bowing the knee to hel. Him prioritizing his own happiness and fulfillment in the form of hel resurrecting his world over the good of the ‘fe multiverse’. Point being, its a complexity of character that I honestly wish we got to see more of, and one I really wasn’t expecting from fe heroes given its track record. you’ll see what i mean down the road.

hel: well not terribly complex in motivation, she basically just wants to kill everything to increase her own power, she gets points for a strong presentation and utilization within the story book 3 creates. The limitations on her insta death power being kinda silly aside, though gustavs gambit to circumvent that i honestly really like more so then alfonses rules lawyering, the overhanging presence she has in the lives of book 3′s characters works really well and the pressure to defeat her because of her effectively endless legions works better as an overhanging threat anyways. When I say presentation though I mean more so in how her words, actions, and motivation intersect because well her words on the face of it have the usual villain posturing, her motivation and actions (such as her relation to eir and her generals, and the world she rules over and created) creates an interesting intersection where one can argue that her posturing words are empty of any true feeling. Shes cold and lifeless like the dead she rules and the world she creates, those around her are simply tools to an end but hardly in a cackling manner and more so in the unthinking manner one treats a toothpick. she gets angry or shocked but even then its in a muted manner, almost performing the emotions rather then truly feeling them. Hel lives in an unchanging world, a stillness brought on by the finality of death, and in a way one can argue that its her unspoken desire to spread that stillness, that perfect unchanging world she controls, to every world. Like lif, its a degree of complexity that I wish we got to see more of, especially in her case, and its something i honestly wasnt expecting from heroes.

helbindi: solely because the man goes through a lot of shit, and is an effective portrayal of a sympathetic villain. Hes effectively a camus if a camus was foul mouthed and more thuggish and that works for him, and is rather endearing in its own way when he acts concerned for his little sister and does the ‘im a thug who hugs kittens when no ones looking’ routine which i like when its done well. point being, he could have been a generic thug but hes a lot more interesting for not being one. However, his general pointlessness to the story, aside from giving us an indication that shock of shocks surtrs a shitty king and an excuse to escort ylgir around places who also does jack shit in the story... heroes is always going to suffer from having to compress its story telling but that fact they waste so much time with helbindi and ylgir and hrud when so much of what they do is either unnecessary to the story or themes present in book 2 or could have been given to other characters and make those characters better for it... helbindi gets to be up here for sympathy points and favoritism, but i am stretching here for ya mate.

thrasir: stronger character wise then helbindi, an interesting relation to lif of enemies turned into close friends over a shared trauma and servitude, plays into some of the same strengths of hel and lif that make them so engaging, yadda, yadda, yadda. So why is she below helbindi? because she doesnt get to do anything, and only starts to get interesting right before her death. If she had been given a bigger role comparable to lif, or just more time to stew in her own motivations she’d easily surpass helbindi. its also not helped that thrasirs own desire to resurrect her brother is similar to veronicas pre established selfishness, which isnt as strong a contrast as lifs selfishness and guilt against alfonses character. Her relation to lif does hint at a stronger sense of kidness and morality instilled within her because of that relation, which is interesting and would make a strong contrast against veronica, but again we get like five seconds of it before shes killed off and then a little more of it again at the end. Deserved more time on screen then she got, and would have probably been number 2 here if she had gotten it.

veronica: bratty child becomes evil sorcerer emperor, more at 11. I like the concept of veronica, its something fes never really touched on much aside from maybe a little bit with julius with his more childish antics. Veronica however cranks that up a lot more, shes impatient and gets bored easily, she wants more friends but in a selfish ‘friend is someone who does everything I want right?’ way, shes emblas ruler and she has the emotional maturity of an evil 10 year old and i just kinda like it. Especially since she tempers it with an air of sophistication and intelligence, much like the classic evil sorcerers fe loves to utilize in villain roles, and it helps balance out the bratty child from being too annoying in the villain role. It helps lend a sense of her trying to present herself as a grown up for the respect and authority that brings, well simultaneously maintain all the perks of being a kid who gets everything she wants. It’s a shame then that the narrative keeps sidelining her, either by focusing on other villains, her god damn brother getting in the fucking way, or with the overhanging implications of magic dragon possession being the root cause of her behavior. I can forgive the magic dragon possession though since that is an fe staple and could works towards more interesting character aspects rather then undercutting her. Regardless, she sure is great when things are actually about her, and i really wish things would get back to being about her.

Laegjarn: solely here because she loves her sister, shes rather flat as a character otherwise. It would have been one thing if she displayed a sense of brutality instilled in her by a childhood being raised by surtr, only dropping the shell when it came to her sister and reigning herself in for the sake of that one familial bond she treasures... instead shes just kinda nice and loves her sister, and yet still works for surtr for some fucking reason. @agoddamn and @ezralahm mention an aspect of learned helplessness to xanders character in fates that people tend to gloss over (heaven knows why, cause its fairly in your face even in the english translation), and that should be something that comes across in laegjarn, but its doesnt really. not as much as it should anyways. Another victim of book 2′s pointless writing.

loki: evil sexy lady with big boobies and a one leg cutout tights pants thing. heres someone who can transform into anyone, and yet she never really does anything with it. oh she does ‘things’, just not things that have much point to them, or really feel like they fit into some larger scheme. she’d be right at home as a recurring villain in an episodic story, coming up with some inane scheme for todays episode that gets foiled and she gets sent ‘blasting off again’. I dont necessarily hate the sexy seductress character, the noire bombshells and the like, they can be fun when done well. loki just doesnt do it well, coming off as more grating and annoying then tempting honestly, and as a villain she lacks anykind of actual menace. My feelings on her are similar to my feelings on aversa honestly, heres someone who should be so cool and threatening, a real menace to the heroes using their skills and abilities behind the scenes to move threats against the heroes, never taking to the field unless they can benefit from it and have an assured chance of victory or safety... but then they never actually do anything, as any of the actions possibly attributable to them either happen offscreen or probably would have happened without them doing anything. Loki and aversa could have stayed home twiddling their thumbs and nothing would change, and thats the real shame about them. Doesn’t help they aren’t particularly fun or entertaining as villains either due to lackluster writing.

surtr: garon 2.0, but with even less complexity. Well garon may have been a blatantly evil prick, he at least had backstory that provoked some degree of complexity and even sympathy, both to him and those hurt by his evil dragon possession personality change. Surtr lacks even that, acting more like a petty thug given way to much power then an imposing ruler. He garon without the backstory complexity, and in a way hes walhart without the air of regality and charisma that helped elevate walhart from being god awful in his own right. And well it could have been interesting if the story made any attempts to comment on that or work it into a central story theme or flow of some sort, it doesnt really do that and instead treats him as if he has and indeed deserves the same credibility and impression walhart or garon or any of the other fire emblem emperor kings have left. But the game doesnt ever actually work for that with him. Hes the emeperor, so he automatically deserves respect as a villain. and thats... so typical of book 2′s writing.

laevatein: shes boring as sin, even with her relation to her sister and the tragedy of losing her. Like her sister, she would have benefited from an impression of learned helplessness but the game never really bothers with it. moving on because i can barely give a shit about her.

bruno: this mother fucker... an annoying detraction that overtakes veronicas spotlight and screentime, an excuse for alfonse wangst that never really lands, pointless and useless... the benefit of book 2 and 3 so far has been his reduced importance, but i fully expect him to come roaring back to steal veronicas position once the story shifts back to an area she should be the focus of. the only thing he has going for him is the sense of a camus struggling with dragon possession but thats more so used for alfonse wangst then it is for anything constructive. What do i mean by alfonse wangst? I mean angst that really serves no narrative purpose then for the sake of unnecessary melodrama, as opposed to informing us anything about the characters or themes of the story. he makes veronica look worse, his drama with alfonse is a waste of time, and he really provides nothing else then a recurring boss fight and get out of jail free card for the story. I’m putting him below laevatein because well i dont give much of a shit about her, she atleast doesnt actively annoy me and still had the potential for something. Bruno however? the story would be better off without him. So fuck him.

#fire emblem #fire emblem heroes

7 notes · View notes

letstalksymphogear · 5 years

Text

Symphogear, EP. 4 (Cont)

The gremlin challenges Tsubasa, a Symphogear, whose entire shtick is to sing to channel power, to sing.

It dawns on her, however, that Tsubasa is part Greninja. Tsubasa used Shadow-Weaving! It’s super effective.

“tell me, you jellyfish looking weirdo...”

“hey- hey, time out. are you gonna do what i think you’re gonna do. this is gonna like, kill you. you know that, right? that you will literally die? you do understand you can just retreat now or- or just take hibiki away, right? i even told you that was the whole point of this... uh... oh shit.”

“ARE YOU READY TO JAM”

“tsubasa please i will literally lend you my remaining brain cell to stop you from this really stupid mistake”

Dad has entered the server.

“oh my god. oh my god. oh my god. oh my god. o- ryoko. stop breathing on me. this isnt helping my anxiety over my adopted daughter figure literally preparing to kill herself over my commands.”

“sorry babe its just the asthma, forgot my inhaler”

“i cannot FUCKING believe of ALL the opponents i had to fight i had to fight the DUMBEST one on the goddamn block, you idiot, you absolute dunce, RETHINK THIS”

“OH GOD SHE’S DOING IT! SHE’S DOING IT! THE ABSOLUTE MADWOMAN- FUCK- FUCK! GET ME OUT OF HERE! FUCK! FUCK!”

“just used up my last brain cell for this attack, pal. you’re through.”

“NAH, EAT ASS YOU- YOU GODDAMN MANIAC”

“HAHA YEAH, GOT YOU NOW, SLOW WALKING, DRAMA INDUCIN’, PURPLE RAIN CHANN-”

“OH GOD! YOU TELEPORTED! YOU’VE GOT SV_CHEATS SET TO 1, DON’T YOU! NOCLIPPING LIKE NOBODY’S BUSINESS GET OUT OF MY FACE”

“WHOA WHOA WHOA WHAT THE FUCK WHOA I KNOW I CRACKED SOME JOKES BUT WE LITERALLY JUST MET AND I- I GOTTA KNOW PEOPLE FIRST BEFORE THIS SHIT AND- OH GOD PLEASE STOP”

“OH GOD! THIS... RAW, GAY, REPRESSED ENERGY... IT’S... TOO STRONG...”

The gremlin could not begin to comprehend Tsubasa’s intense love for incredibly well-built redheaded women.

Hibiki can, though.

“SO......... MUCH........... SAUCE...................”

“.................................................”

The gremlin retreats after getting her licks. This scene subtly implied something; the Nehushtan armor she wears regenerates over time, which means no matter how much damage it sustains, it will always return in one piece. The same can’t be said for the user, though.

Hibiki runs to Tsubasa, checking if she’s okay, totally oblivious to the gravity of what just happened.

“i came just as i could and ive brought happy meals for everyone”

Genjuro asks if Tsubasa is okay.

I dunno man, this is a pretty tough judgement call here. I mean, is she okay? Pain is a pretty subjective experience, after all.

“oh my god i get it. i get the joke she implied. she wanted to jam. she’s jammed! cause it- it looks like jam! no, wait, its more like sauce...”

It dawns on Hibiki that people actually do die during this job.

Tsubasa, as it turns out, survived her Swan Song. It makes sense that she would because she was naturally receptive to her relic, Ame-No-Habakiri. Still, the injury comes with great gravity. She’s benched for the next season, and it’s likely she’s gonna miss the playoffs.

Stuck on a respirator on the edge of life, Tsubasa will probably look back at this and go, “Gosh, I was such a wild child. Haha. Almost dying and all.”

Hibiki wraps her single braincell around the idea of death. Most main characters aren’t familiar with the concept of death, you see, because most don’t die. But this is Season One Symphogear. Flirting with death is common.

Ogawa comes in to comfort her.

“dumbass had her opponent bound and the gremlin still escaped anyway”

Ogawa then explains shit we already know. Thanks, Ogawa.

“in summation: i get where you’re coming from, but stop fucking saying ‘im gonna replace kanade’, please, im begging you”

Hibiki FINALLY gets it, and naturally upon realizing, feels really bad for it. A real right and true asshole.

“oh thank god i was worried not even that was going to get to you”

Meanwhile, in Tsubasa’s mind...

“ah fuck me. im trapped in metaphor limbo. see, im falling because i clipped my wing, cause i nearly died, you know, like icarus and shit”

“hold up my gay senses are tingling”

Her senses confirmed. Kanade is in her mind, in probably the most romantic metaphor possible. There is absolutely no way to interpret all of this platonically.

Tsubasa is literally submerged in a sea of her own emotions...

Involving Kanade, and how she strives to be like her and honor her memory.

SHE LITERALLY DROWNS IN THOSE EMOTIONS, SUBMERGING DEEPER INTO THE WATER.

youtube

Tsubasa, in her Symphogear Brand Medical Cocoon for the Dumb and Beaten Down, quietly slumbers in her semi-comatose state as she wrestles the water metaphors of her own sexual identity.

The poor thing just misses her girlfriend.

Meanwhile, Hibiki sits and thinks more than usual. In a flashback, Genjuro muses about how The Gremlin wanted to kidnap Hibiki.

“i dunno maybe The Gremlin’s super lonely or shit”

“i mean if thats the case ill just adopt her too”

Since Tsubasa is away, Hibiki has to pick up the quota for teenage angst in the 2nd Division. Unfortunately, she has very big shoes to fill, but Hibiki isn’t one for slacking in the misery department. She blames herself for everything.

“im really going to fire the therapist we have around here for being pretty damn useless”

“can i be the therapist?”

“ryoko i am absolutely begging you to filter your bad ideas given the several teenage crises we’re dealing with right now”

Hibiki then yells out, for what is possibly the third time, out of the blue:

“I HAVE PEOPLE I WANT TO PROTECT”

The flashback ends.

And speaking of girlfriends.

“there is no force on this planet stopping me from having some quality fucking time with my girlfriend damnit”

Miku points out Hibiki has been pretty lonely. Says she heard it from a friend who, heard it from a friend who, heard it from another she was messin’ ‘round.

Unfortunately, Miku is a goddamned chad.

Immediate handholding. Make no mistake. Behind those soft-spoken eyes lies an absolute master.

“o-oh, my hand, you’re holding it, so smoothly”

“hibiki, you’re my sunshine. i want to soak up your rays so hard that every piece of flesh of my body is horribly mutilated from skin cancer.”

“jesus christ miku at least use sunscreen in your metaphors”

“ill use them just for you, hibiki. just for you.”

Their relationship is interesting. When one of them is sad, the other sorta acts as an angst vacuum. You’ll see them flip flop with their points of misery with each other, but when together, those problems always melt away.

Of course, emphasis on being together. Season 1 is the worst with keep them away from each other.

“Just Be Yourself!” Miku Kohinata, Symphogear, 2012.

“fuck me, you’re right. im the protagonist. i cant just eat shit here the whole time. i gotta do protagonist things!”

“was that an invitation?”

“another time. but now... let’s just catch up.”

And so, they laugh together about how the recorded footage of the meteor shower was all black. Truly the greatest couple of all time.

It is this realization of being her own self, coupled with her renewed gay energy, and new perspective on what she must do, that causes everything to go uphill for her from here. Take note.

Here is where a God is truly born.

Tachibana Hibiki.

The end of this episode cuts to a specific dojo.

Genjuro’s dojo.

“i dont fuck around with training, even though i probably should have trained you sooner. you sure about this?”

“dadman either you do this or i will most definitely die next time”

Part of their training involves watching action movies, because Genjuro is so unreal that he should frankly be a fictional character in the very universe he exists in.

Fucking adorable.

“im so conflicted its so clear she’s part of /fit/ now but i cant help but imagine her washboard abs”

Hibiki balls even harder at karaoke now, due to her Symphogear training, and not because she’s secretly Aoi Yuki playing a recolored version of Madoka.

Her significant other is mildly terrified at the superhuman that is slowly unfolding her powers before her eyes.

In the end, things all reach their logical conclusion.

Hibiki becomes a Tekken character, just like Genjuro.

Of course... Miku pushes the fact very subtly that she would never hide anything from Hibiki...

Turmoil brews in the worst way... soon...

#symphogear #symphogear season 1 #recap #anime

19 notes · View notes