#and then he'll send something about a completely different topic

[weeping-vintage-toes]

This is so funny, me and my wife are messaging via voice message on Snapchat about too completely fucking different things.

[pineappleciders]

heyy first of all its me the fucked up dream anon (now going by dream anon how original) second of all ive decided im going to learn about south park purely through your work so can i get some tweek (ive latched onto that boy) and whoever else you want (probably the main boys) with a reader (all platonic ofc) who's got that #anxiety? thanks even if you dont do it <33

🌌🌟/dream anon

main 4 + tweek with a reader who has anxiety; platonic headcanons

A/N: haii :3 i apologize if this like, distorts your vision of the characters or something. i am so glad you are being converted to the religion of tweek!!!!!!

TRIGGER WARNING: anxiety disorders, light mental health topics, paranoia, panic/anxiety attacks, death mention on kennys part

stan marsh

i think stan has a normal amount of anxiety. like he's so regular. he's your average joe

like he gets anxious over tests, and giving speeches, and over wendy. other than that he doesn't experience it to the extent of a disorder

so it might be a little difficult for him to imagine getting anxious over simple things like ordering food and stuff like that

he'll try his best to listen though, although he'll probably try to kinda reason with you, esp if you're feeling paranoid or something

"dude, i checked twice, it's locked. relax, man."

he'll try to distract you, by playing games and watching stuff, and just generally kinda trying to be funny to take your mind off of things

if you're having a panic/anxiety attack, he kinda panics too at first, before quickly pulling you away and asking what's wrong. he is sweating very hard

if you're unresponsive, he tries to stay calm but is honestly considering calling an ambulance. like he thinks you're having a stroke

"shit, a panic attack? uh, okay, errr.... take deep breaths, okay? in.. and out. in.. and out. okay, that's good.."

he looks up grounding techniques on his phone and relays them to you until you calm down and catch your breath. he like sends you images off of google of the 5 senses technique randomly and says he figured you'd need it someday

he tries to keep your anxiety in mind, and might slip up sometimes, but for the most part he tries to be careful with his words and actions as to not worry you. he shows his care in subtle ways!!

kyle broflovski

he tries to kinda. logic it out a bit. like if you're feeling insecure he tells you how unrealistic it is for someone to think about one random passerby's appearance forever

he does feel bad though. he doesn't completely understand, but whenever he's feeling insecure he tends to get really anxious about people at school

he usually gets anxious whenever he's doing something wrong or sneaking out. like he's actually sweating and shitting his pants thinking about what his mom will do to him if she finds out

he'll encourage you to order food for yourself, to get yourself out there more, and if you succeed he'll pat your shoulder and smile a lil

if you don't want to, he might dramatically sigh but he'll do it anyways. cuz he knows how hard it is

i do think he'd get a little anxious about asking workers for help and stuff, but he'll be the bigger person... he supposes... smh my head...

when you have an panic attack for the first time, he's like really confused and gets super concerned that you're having a heart attack, and pulls his phone out to dial your parents or 911

"i'm here for you dude! listen- hey, listen to me. it's okay. can- can you-"

he tries to talk to you to de-escalate it, but he gives up and has his hand on your back, while looking up what the fuck to do

'friend havign panjc atgack what to do'

if you're okay with it, he probably talks to your parents about it. he doesn't really trust himself to be able to always calm you down, so he encourages getting outside/professional help

he does try though, and he'll always be there for you in different ways!! like when you need help with something or just need company to distract you, he's at ur door with his xbox 360

eric cartman

you can tell that eric gets a little uncomfortable if you're freaking out or feeling anxious. whether it's because he actually feels bad or just doesn't know how to handle your emotions, you'll never know

but either way, he'll probably just like. sit next to you like "dude, what's up with you?" or in other cases he'll sneakily slip out of the room unseen

he does try to be kinda logical about it, but that's solely because he physically can't speak words of comfort.

"i mean, dude, be seriously. nobody cares about you that much to notice." you speak such kind words eric!!

he doesn't really like it when things get serious, so he'll generally try to transition the situation into something more casual. like he'll try to ease your (his) mood by getting snacks and playing games together, or even begging his mom to take you both to KFC

if you have a panic attack, all of his alarms are blaring and his brain is screaming flight!!!!! flight!!!! run the fuck away!!!!

and he probably tries to, but when you notice him and call his name he physically deflates

he awkwardly turns around and slowly strolls over. "Y/N... heeeeeeey... what's up... duuude..." you can hear the strain in his voice

if it gets to be too much, as in you won't stop hyperventilating or can't breathe, he'll probably alert an adult or take you to the nurse or something. he tells himself it's because he doesn't want to be a suspect of your death

if ur having trouble ordering food he'll gladly take ur place and make a scene to get all eyes on him. "erm excuthe me they athed for no pickleth🤓"

other than when you're voicing your anxiety, he probably treats you the same. i don't really think he'd take advantage of your anxiety unless you were like. butters or heidi or something and he was really trying to get you to do something for him or just trying to. stick himself in your mind. because he's a narcissist and he loves that!!

kenny mccormick

he doesn't relate necessarily, but he definitely understands.

he lives a lot of his life in fear of his next death, and is constantly praying it be quick and painless

kenny is more of a reserved fella, but not really shy or anxious. so if you're having trouble speaking up or ordering something he'll step up and do it gladly!!

i think he'd be pretty decent at comforting. like he'll pat his hand on your back and speak assuring, muffled words

"mm, mmph mmph mmmph! mmph mph mph mmmfmf mmf mph mph mmph!" (aww, it'll be okay. i'll walk you every step of the way, buddy!)

he tries to take your emotions into consideration more, and grabs your hand and squeezes it sometimes if you need a boost of confidence. sometimes he forgets your anxiety and says something rude and feels really bad about it

when you're having a panic attack, he's honestly really scared and expects you to start foaming at the mouth or something

he'll hesitate, but he'll pat your back and try to help you with grounding techniques. the 5-4-3-2-1 in particular is his favorite, and he'll tell you how to do it in like a rlly sweet and calming voice

he's still spooked though, and gets you a water bottle and like a washcloth. he's incredibly thankful you aren't dying or anything

kenny is very good at comforting! sometimes all it takes is a simple moment of eye contact and seeing his eyes crinkle that gives you a surge of calmness you didn't know you needed

tweek tweak

tweek is no outsider to anxiety and stress. he's literally a living beehive with all that damn vibrating

to anyone else, it would seem like tweek had a severe anxiety disorder, or even ADHD. but it turns out it's just a result of his crippling meth addiction and caffiene overdoses

he tries to think about what craigs taught him, about grounding techniques and how to handle a panic attack, and tries to apply those for you

he's shakily take your hand and wrap you in a blanket, making you hot cocoa and helping you slowly come back to your senses

"okay, okay, what are 5 things you can touch? or- no- AGH! was it 5 things you see- hear? no, ACK! i can't remember!"

most of the time if you're feeling on-edge about something, his main goal will be to just listen to you talk and validate your feelings. he doesn't really make it a point to give you advice or try to be logical, unless you directly ask for it

he's great at listening!!! he also doesn't trust his own advice enough to say it to someone else.

he really tries to think hard about what comforts him when he's anxious, and so he tries to use the tactics for you. for instance, he tries to help you get into a hobby like painting to have a bit more control over yourself

hc that tweek loves to draw with crayons so he'll make little drawings of you and him as stick figures being all happy and give them to you. as a treat

overall he is very attentive, and cares a lot. he tries his very best to be there for you, and a lot of the time that results in you two just hanging out or gaming together, so you can both get your mind off of things for a while. it makes him happy to be able to be there for someone else like craig was for him

[princelylove]

Dearest Prince,

Your La Squadra post is one of my favorites and it got me curious about some of the guys.

Ghiaccio is a name we barely see on your blog and I would love to know more about your interpretation of him. Whatever it is you got; from the regular facts to the complete degeneracy, I am interested in knowing.

Thank you for your time and interest, as well as your patience, I've been lacking in the "sending asks" department.

Heart heart xoxo

Oh, Ciocio. My favorite 4chan user. Sure.

Ghiaccio is one of those characters that, to me, are so established in my head that I feel as if I'm doing nothing by elaborating. It's very clear cut. Incel that actually goes to the gym and has a job, so he's automatically better than other forum users, yet he's not because he's always on there and is the first to make fun of 'the losers.'

Ghiaccio has a certain sense of superiority because he's not in that sort of Hazamada-ish porn addict incel category- yeah, he's a virgin in his middle-to-late twenties, and has basically no eye are el friends, but he's not a fucking degenerate. He's better. Yeah, he doesn't inherently see women as objects- it's just, uh, factual that they're only after... certain things.

Ghiaccio has a very complex relationship with women. They trigger his abandonment issues worse than any man could, even if all they're doing is acting indifferently. No matter what you do, you can't win. Play into it without trying? Tease. Don't play into it without trying? Prude. Bitch. Play into it on purpose? Whore. Don't play into it on purpose? You're playing hard to get. It's not like Ghiaccio actively thinks of women as lesser, or just less intelligent- obviously he doesn't think like that, intelligence has nothing to do with sex, jackass- it's just that those are the first words that pop into his head when he's angry and it seems like the one he has eyes for is leaving.

Always leaving. It's always something. He did something wrong again, and your stupid woman brain thought he'd just get it and would understand entirely when you didn't tell him what it was, and- He'll calm down eventually.

His relationship issues with women could stem from a lot of things. It could be his mother, the fact that he never had a long term relationship with a girl his age, the fact that he mainly consumes media (porn, or fetish content.) that objectifies them- any number of things could be it. His sexism actually isn't in the classic 'women are in their prime when they're younger' way, it's more of a 'women prefer older men because older men are real men' way. Which can get confusing at times, because he's the type to project heavily onto the women in his life, and he's not very good at explaining himself.

It's easier to ramble about a set topic with clear facts. It's objectively correct that Venesia- yeah, Venesia, say it in their fuckin' dialect you God damn [REDACTED. Reason for redaction: contains slur.]- is the actual name. Feelings aren't something you can fact check on a different tab.

It affects him more when a woman doesn't show interest in him. When a guy does it, it's like yeah, of course, fuckin' low value male would be jealous of him. Ghiaccio struggles with his self worth and meeting his own expectations. It's a lot of internalized loathing that presents itself as "Of course you're using me for dinner and want me to pay. You're trying to cuck me." Since Ghiaccio never really learned proper coping mechanisms, he usually just beats the shit out of whatever piece of furniture is closest to him. Goodbye, end table. It was nice knowing you.

Ghiaccio knows nothing of gentle love, but he knows he has to act right or his darling is going to freak out on him and give him a massive headache. He thinks he's above the guys that hit their bitch their partner, but he always manages to bruise them in some way, shape, or form. He has a bit of a problem with grabbing his darling too tightly and not easing up.

It's both a possessive thing and a complete accident. He just doesn't know what to do when you panic in front of him- holding you down works, usually? Yeah? Going for your throat should be fine, you can feel like you're secure in one spot, why the fuck are you hitting him now???? He's not going to seriously hit you, stop freaking out, holy shit. He's not a bad man that's planning on raping you or some shit, jesus christ, can you just calm down and think rationally?

When you actually calm down, likely after he gets pissed and fucks off for a while, he'll come back to check on you. He likes you. You should eat. He cut up some shit things for you. He just doesn't like when you're sobbing and assuming shit and acting hysterical.

He's really trying. He's really, really trying. It's hard to calm down and be the man his darling needs, but you keep saying such moronic shit- it's fine. It's fine. You're just a little stupid, he can work with that, if you start to listen to him.

Ghiaccio's good for hugs and that's about it. He won't let anything harm you. It's stupid to think that he'd just allow some other guy to touch you or speak to you enough to harm you. Come on, stop crying, he's right here, he can give you what you need to survive and be happy, he can be good to you if you don't piss him off intentionally. He can, and will. He's just frustrated right now.

The next day, when the bruises form. . . it's hard to hide how pleased he is. God, that's hot. Should give you more. What's a better way to get frustration out of his system?

[eternitas]

Hi Lou!! Tbh, I'd love to ask you...all of the selfship questions, but I'll be nice and say 1-4 uwu for Gokudera! [Unless you're cool with answering them all 👀✨️]

Just for fun selfship ask meme

Thank you so so much for sending this in! ... 3... months ago orz I am so so sorry for answering so late, I hope waiting for my answer was worth it QwQ

1. does your f/o have any special nicknames for you? what are they? do you have a favorite?

Gokudera isn't exactly super openly affectionate or romantic. He is pragmatic and when he is romantic it is a rare, but genuine moment just between them. While he doesn't have a special nickname, he does sometimes call Rena "tesoro" (itl. treasure) and has refered to her as a sun or glowing star, though never to her face.

2. do you and your f/o share any hobbies? what are they? do you see one another as rivals, collaborators, something else?

Rena and Hayato are competitive spirits and often get into little competitions with each other that usually hold either no stakes but their pride, or chores and small gifts. It's never harsh enough that Dera becomes seriously upset over a loss (he actually really appreciates that she can give him a run for his money), but it's also never completely trivial. These competitions can range from who gets to a place first, to directly facing off in a video or card game (especially with poker and other games where you have to keep your reactions in check Rena usually has the upper hand due to her knowledge in acting and directing, being able to pick up on the subtlest of changes in Gokuderas demeanor, who still has a hard time keeping his emotions in check).

Interestingly enough when it comes to hobbies they diverge a bit. Rena loves to be creative, her work at the theater is incredibly fullfilling to her, so she spends a lot of time going to see different plays and reads new pieces. Hayato is also very creative, but his creativity leans more towards the engineering and constructing. In that they are supportive with and towards each other, but don't necesarily always partake in the others interest. However they both are interested in the supernatural, with Rena being a scaredy cat that is mostly into mythology and the occult while Hayato is more interested in cryptids and extraterestrials. Hayato likes going ghost hunting or cryptid hunting and once in a while he can persuade Rena to tag along though not without promising up and down that he won't scare her on purpose and that he'll protect her if anything does happen.

One hobby they do participate in together is movie nights. They switch up who picks the movie and each one of them has a chance to veto a pick. They both enjoy watching all kinds of movies and talk about them, dissecting story, special and practical effects, character writing and acting, directing- they can both contribute their own knowledge to these talks which are even more enjoyable to them than the movies themselves.

Small picrew I edited depicting them watching a scary movie.

Original

3. do you have any songs that remind you of your f/o? a playlist? what do they think of it, if you’ve shared it with them?

Okay so I USED to have a playlist but I deleted it orz, tho there are two songs I def remember associating with this ship which is

Cinderblock Garden by All Time Low and Perfect by Topic and Ally Brooke

4. where are your favorite places to go with your f/o? what’s your favorite part of that place, or the time you spend together there?

When it comes to favourite places to be at then there come only 3 to mind. First is Renas apartment. It's a small 2 room flat with an open kitchen, a big livingroom with a narrow balcony and a small bedroom. It's cozy but not claustrophobic and Hayato stays over a few times. After a very eventful day it's nice to flop onto the sofa and watch a movie together.

Then there is one of Renas favourite cafes. It's in a sidestreet of the city, rather small and has a bit of a maritime country-chic flair with exceptionally good coffee and cake. They don't usually house big groups or many people so it never feels cramped and or overwhealming when it comes to the surounding noise.

Last but definitely not least is the westpark. It's close to the Residence where the Neo Vongola stay in italy and is often place of performances by Renas theater group Mosaico. It's a nice small park with one half of the park being mostly greenspace for people to chill on and the other being a bit more groomed, layed out and romantic with benches and grenery tunnels.

(Thinking specifically about the passages I personally know, here, here, and here, plus a well kept flower garden park as depicted here)

In general: anywhere where it's not too full and too loud is a nice place for them to hang out.

[corpseybun]

Well, you've asked for prompts, so here I am. If you've read the Silver Eyes, could you tell me your take on the journals and the whole theory in the willry fandom that Will said: "Oh...you're something beautiful because of her dad vs because he knew that she was a robot and thought of her as such, since it was because Henry made her.

As much as I love Willry, I feel like in The Silver Eyes canon, it wouldn't happen. Those journals are directly described as being "full of raving paranoia, passages about Henry that ranged from wild jealousy to near worship."

That doesn't really come off as love to me. In my opinion, it comes off far more like an immense jealousy, like a feverish want to have everything Henry has, to be Henry.

Granted, it is just a single line. I've seen so many different interpretations of those journals and of William and Henry's dynamic as a whole, and I can't say I have a singular favorite interpretation of them. We get the smallest little scraps of how William truly felt about Henry. It can lead to such great ideas from fans, and I love it.

On the topic of Charlie being fascinating to William, I cant help but think that's because she's a robot.

William lost his daughter, just like Henry did. He (debatably) tried to bring Elizabeth back too, and yet she came back wrong. She wasn't his daughter. She's her own person, yes, but she isn't the person William wanted back. And yet here stands Charlie, a metaphorical middle finger to all of William's experiments on immortality, the fact she has complete autonomy and is able to live even after Henry's passing is of course going to be beutiful to William. Henry did what he couldn't: he truly made something alive, and that's beautiful to him.

Granted, I also like the idea of her being beautiful to him because of her connection to Henry. She's Henry's final gift to the world, of course he'll see nothing but beauty in that. Charlie is everything he's ever wanted to create, she's seemingly the very embodiment of the thing he's trying to create with his remnant research: life.

Charlie was created because of suffering, yes, but unlike everything else William unintentionally helped create with his killings, she isn't stuck in that suffering. Unlike Elizabeth, Charlie is able to move on from her death and truly live in spite of that.

I know not everyone believes that was Charlie that John saw at the end of The Fourth Closet, but I personally believe it is. I love the idea of Charlie still living with her beloved, of her processing and moving on from not just her own death, but of everyone else's.

I'd love to see fanworks of her processing Jen's passing, of her eventually coming with the fact she will outlive her friends. If you have any to recommend please send me them! Thanks for reading this far, by the way. I hope this answered your questions.

[spiteless-xo]

worked up and sound for the asks! with eren (or all, if you feel so inclined 👀)

spicy self ship asks

yay tysm anon!! since im so bored i'll do it for everyone 🥰

Worked Up - what is your f/o like when turned on? Are they desperate, tense, barely restrained? How do they handle it?

eren - he's a menace. when he's turned on he's barely a human being, he's just so laser-focused on fucking that he completely forgets his surroundings. he literally can't handle it, he can only take care of it, which involves a lot of risky quickies or--if we have the luxury of privacy--long, drawn-out sessions until he's fully spent

jean - he's a little shy or even apologetic when he's turned on, especially if it's unprompted and we're not fooling around. it's not that he doesn't like having sex, but i think he just feels bad about how horny he is all the time. and he thinks he's good at hiding it, but it's so blatantly obvious to everyone around 💀 he gets super handsy when he's turned on so suddenly his hands keep finding their way up my dress or he's pulling me to sit on his lap and i'm like, welp, ok, time to go.

satoru - he's a mix of eren and jean. when he's turned on, he's a complete menace like eren and also handsy like jean, but there's no shame or willingness to wait until we're somewhere private--he's actively making other people around us uncomfortable by dirty talking and practically humping me like a dog. he's so annoying and bratty, but like, what's anyone gonna do about it? he's satoru gojo, he can do whatever he wants.

suguru - he's an adult and knows how to control himself when he's turned on, but he'll make it known by subtle touches on my waist or thighs, leaning down to whisper into my ear about what he has planned for when we get some privacy. maybe even send some dirty text messages if there isn't an opportunity for us to talk to one another--won't stop until i'm just as worked up as he is when we're leaving.

Sound - what does your f/o sound like in bed? Are they loud or quiet? Breathy? Do they dirty talk you?

eren - groaner, definitely. but he tries to hold himself back so a lot of the time it comes out like little breathy huffs or throaty sounds because he's lowkey a little embarrassed about being vocal in bed because he sees it as a "girl thing". so that just makes it all the more rewarding when he finally lets go and lets himself make noise in bed. also a huge fan of dirty talk. he always knows exactly what i need to hear, whether it's something nasty or something sweet. he's very intuitive and good at reading body language so he's good at stoking that fire, but sometimes when he's in "demon mode" he just goes nuts and says crazy, nasty stuff the whole time.

jean - sooo loud in bed. so vocal it's insane! moaning, groaning, whimpering--this man does not hold anything back. he's also a big dirty talk guy but the closer he gets to finishing, the less coherent he becomes until he's just a little babbling mess, it's very adorable.

satoru - won't shut up in bed. he's not even moaning or groaning, he's just running his mouth. loves to say the most out-of-pocket shit he can think of, just to see if i have any sort of reaction to it and the SECOND he finds something that i'm into, he will not drop it. if i accidentally moan a little louder when he's talking about tying me up, suddenly he's going all in on the topic. talking about different ways he'd tie me up to the bed, maybe he'd even figure out how to hang me from the ceiling? "you'd like that, wouldn't you?"

suguru - actually pretty quiet in bed! not in the way that eren is, where he's holding himself back, but suguru is just so tense all the time that i think it's difficult for him to really relax, even during sex and that's why he's such a giver 👀 but same with eren, when he does make noises, it's like a reward. for dirty talk, it's all praise--how good it feels, how pretty i look, how in love he is--so it really makes sex feel like we're making love rather than fucking like the other boys.

[yuki-shipnoda]

Been obsessed with the topic of mother & baby homes and family reunion shows lately so... lo and behold, Yukierre-turned-Lawsunoda Long Lost Family AU

Warning: This drabble contains elements inspired by the real-life events of the forced adoption industry, particularly of the Baby Scoop Era. Reader discretion is advised.

So, it was the 1960s...

Yuki Tsunoda was a young international student who travelled all the way to Milton Keynes, England from Japan to pursue his university studies in engineering. During his orientation week, he meets Pierre Gasly, a student representative of his university and his assigned mentor for freshman year. He introduces himself to Yuki and shows him around the campus grounds. As time passed by, Yuki and Pierre grew closer and closer, until one day, they got curious and fooled around in Yuki's dorm room, ignoring the consequences of their actions.

Things soon took a turn for the worse, as Yuki realised he wasn't feeling very well. He kept feeling nauseous and faint, thinking that something wasn't right. He went to see the doctor and discovered a major bombshell that he was pregnant. Yuki was shocked to the core at the news, realising his life was now completely ruined.

Perhaps he could ask Pierre to marry him so the baby won't be a bastard? Sounded like a solid plan.

Yuki went up to Pierre privately with the medical letter in hand, proving that he didn't lie about it. So him the truth about his pregnancy, and then Pierre shuts him down, telling Yuki that it would jeopardise his relationship with Kika. Yuki insists he should be responsible, but Pierre tells him it's not his problem anymore and walks away.

Yuki comes to see Christian, his academic advisor, telling him about his problem, fearing he'll lose his spot in university. Christian understands his problem and tells him that he has to be sent away to a maternity home and give his baby up for adoption to hide his shame. Yuki, with no other choice to make, accepts the advice and Christian helps him look for one.

As the weeks pass, Yuki has to hide his growing belly while attending classes until he's made it to the third trimester, where he has to be sent away to a maternity home. Christian and his wife were kind enough to send him away in place of his parents. As Yuki was led inside by the matron for his interview, he saw different expecting parents doing various activities, from doing chores to reading books, knitting, and playing card games. It doesn't seem so bad, he thinks.

Day in and day out, Yuki and the other single parents went through the same scheduled activities. They woke up, washed up, got dressed, had breakfast, and did chores around the home whether it was cleaning the rooms, mopping the floors, doing the laundry, or cooking. After they had lunch, they had time to do recreational activities, as well as make some clothes or going-away packages for their baby once they were adopted, along with church services every Sunday and monthly checkups by a nearby midwife. It was kind of nice, he got to chat with some of the poor youths who were there to atone for their sins too.

Soon, while in the middle of doing the chores, Yuki went into labour, and one of the girls told the matron about it. She went up to Yuki and brought him away to an ambulance waiting outside to send him away to the hospital.

Many hours later, Yuki delivered a healthy baby. He wasn't able to see or even hold his babies as the doctors and the nuns took the babies away from him, never letting him see them until much later after the post-birth medical checks.

Yuki returned to the home about a day later with his baby cradled in his arms, excitedly greeted by the other young parents in the home. He carefully cared for his infant the thought of adoption day looming over him as he tried to cherish as much as he could with them.

One day while sweeping the floors, he saw a couple walking past him with the matron, the woman was holding a swaddled baby that oddly looked like his. The matron pulled him with them to her office where he was about to sign away legal rights of his baby to the adoptive parents. He hesitantly picked up the fountain pen and with a sigh, signed doen the dotted lines, realising he's giving away his baby to a couple of strangers. He gave a small wave to his baby as he saw the couple walk away wuth them, his baby never to be seen again. Tears stream down his face as he walked out of the matron's office and back to his broom, having to finish his chores to atone his sins.

~~~

Many decades have passed since that tragic experience, and Yuki has since then started over with his life. He has re-entered higher education again, this time going to culinary school. Upon graduating, he moved to Faenza, Italy and started a popular fusion cooking restaurant, got married to a graphic artist named Liam Lawson.

One day Yuki told Liam that he wanted to find his long-lost child just before he gets too old and dies. Liam, who was well aware of Yuki's past, agreed with the idea and bought him a DNA testing kit. Yuki followed the instructions, and a few weeks later, got the results back. An email notification suddenly popped up on his phone and he saw that there was a match with him, sharing 50% of his genetics, denoting that must've been his now-grown-up child.

Yuki decided to send them a message, telling the other user that he must be their bio dad and told them his backstory. The other person sent them a reply saying that the story lined up with what their birth records state. With a sigh of relief, he sends them a message of where they live. Turns out, they live in Milan.

So Yuki and Liam set off on holiday to reunite with the long lost kid. When they arrived in Milan, they went to get lunch at a nearby eatery, and by sheer coincidence, they bumped into Pierre. He went up to Yuki and told him that he missed him a lot and wondered where he had been. Yuki got angry at him, yelling at him for having unprotected intercourse with him all those years ago and having to be forced to give the baby up for adoption. Pierre was shocked at hearing that statement come out of his mouth and Pierre gave him a long-awaited apology. Pierre asked them why they were in Milan and Yuki told him that the baby who he gave up for adoption lives here now. Pierre decides that he should meet up with the child as well because they deserve to know who their biological parents are.

So the next day, Yuki and Pierre headed to a cafe together, where they looked around and saw a person sitting drinking coffee. When they looked up and saw Yuki, they waved hello at him, inviting them both towards them. Yuki hugged them tightly and burst into tears, sobbing onto their shoulder and saying they're sorry for having to give them up all those years ago. Yuki introduces Pierre to their child and they all burst into tears, finally, a family reunited after so many years. Their child tells them all of their life stories, telling them that they had a wonderful childhood with many happy memories with their adoptive parents. Yuki and Pierre told them that they had since gotten married and had their own kids, Yuki had 2 while Pierre had 3. They exchanged family photos and phone numbers, hoping to create a big family reunion and many more happy memories with their child in the picture from here on out.

[ciaossu-imagines]

Sorry if this is too much for one ask, but M, K, and J for Enki (Nanba)? Also, is it ok to send the same questions but for different characters?

Thanks so much for sending in a request, my gorgeous anon! I'm more than happy to do these up for you and I hope you'll enjoy the headcanons! I'm generally pretty easy-going about how many requests get sent in or if there's a couple more prompts than I asked for...though I do want to say, not just to you, anon dear, but everyone that when I do set character limits or prompt limits (lately, one character, one prompt per ask), it's usually for a reason - it makes it quicker to answer the asks and I can normally write more for the post since I'm focusing on only one topic, especially where I'm still getting back into writing and a large majority of what is in my inbox is multi-character requests. However, to answer your second question - it is perfectly okay to send in multiple requests for the same character or the same prompt with a different character because I'll work on them when I have ideas for those characters or prompts. Anyway, smut is under the cut, and I hope it satisfies, dear! I think this is one of the first times I've ever wrote Enki seriously and I hope I did him justice!

M(otivation): what turns them on, gets them going

Oh, you're going to hate me, anon dear. Enki doesn't get turned on, not that he'll admit or allow himself. This man has such a strict control on his own emotions and desires. He compartmentalizes and reins in any impulses, desires, or needs that he feels acts against his work and purpose.

K(ink): one or more of their kinks

Does Enki have kinks, fetishes, and fantasies that pop into his mind, despite how much control he has of his mind? Most definitely he does. It's normal and human.

However, I'm really, really sorry to disappoint, but Enki is highly unlikely to act on these kinks, fetishes or fantasies. His view towards sex is very traditional, almost puritanically so. Sex to him is something saved for marriage, when two people fully commit to each other and your virginity is a gift you give to another.

He doesn't have casual sex and I honestly see Enki as completely a virgin in the series, since he dedicated his life to justice and his work. He saw that as his calling more than a life that allowed him the time for marriage and children, though he did sometimes allow himself moments of wondering what such a life would have been like and did sometimes feel moments of sadness or longing for such a life.

Even in marriage, Enki has very firm ideas of what is and isn't proper sexual behaviour. Sex should be loving, enjoyable, but at it's core, I do think it is something Enki believes should be done largely to carry on the family line and for reproductive purposes.

J(ack Off): masturbation headcanons

You know the belief that everyone masturbates? I'm normally the first to agree, but honestly, when it comes to Enki, I don't. As mentioned prior in these headcanons, Enki keeps a really tight rein on his own sexual desires due to his strong moral codes and ideas of what is right and proper.

So, while I do think he has masturbated at least once, probably during the start of his sexual awakening, before he got that tight rein firmly in there, I don't think it's something he does as an adult or often during his teenage years.

Enki doesn't buy into the belief that sex is an absolute necessity or that desires must be satisfied for the body's happiness. He very much does turn any sexual frustration he feels into energy he can spend on other things, such as physical and mental training or his work.

[tarohonii]

Sucheon and Gangseok Friendship in 5 minutes

blorbo thoughts consumed my mind. More elaboration on this chart below the cut

sends cute stuff/sends cursed stuff:

I feel like Gangseok is also an stickler for cats and anything cute in general and is just an overall softie for that kind of thing, so he probably sends things like flowers/cats/animals. As for Sucheon, I feel like he wouldn't send neither cursed or cute stuff necessarily and would fall into the more dead center, but I can see him sending something cursed more than sending something cute. I feel like both of them would send each other photo's of their gross ass injuries all the time.

argues for fun/conflict averse:

Sucheon doesn't argue for fun, and usually minds his own business, but if provoked he'd definitely start shit. As for Gangseok, he manages to remain remarkably out of it, and is an general peacekeeper.

Shares food/steals food:

It's my personal headcanon that Sucheon is an picky eater and Gangseok has an cast iron stomach and as a result of that Gangseok just eats whatever Sucheon doesn't want. However, in terms of generosity, I think that Gangseok would share his snacks and Sucheon would be the one stealing.

completely feral/mom friend:

I just realized I forgot to put Gangseok's circle on that one ANSJDASJ. But he'd definitely be on the far "mom friend" side. He already has that leader vibe to him, but is also incredibly caring and compassionate and I can see him scolding Sucheon for being..Sucheon. As for Sucheon, while he isn't completely unrestrained and feral, sometimes he'll go off his fucking rocker. Paired with his sharp tongue and "i don't give a fuck about you or your feelings" attitude, it's enough to constitute him as pretty feral.

shoulder to cry on/always crying:

This one was a bit of an stretch for me, especially on Sucheon's part. Gangseok of course would be the shoulder to cry on, and since Sucheon has an considerable amount of baggage compared to Gangseok, I put him more farther on the 'always crying' part. However, I doubt he'd ever truly cry, but moreso be more emotionally unbalanced and would need Gangseok to keep his emotions steady.

introvert/extrovert:

I think both of them are introverts, but Sucheon moreso than Gangseok. However, I do consider Gangseok to be someone who's introverted by choice rather than being painfully awkward and unable to connect with anyone. I see him as someone who prefers solitude, and Sucheon's just an more radical version of that. He does not like people.

affection through words/affection through action:

Because Sucheon is shown many times to lack anything that's virtually nice in the verbal department, he's kind of forced into the 'affection through actions' kind of person. I feel like it'd be less acts of service and more of him noticing things about the other person or stepping in for them. Gangseok, on the other hand, I can see being someone who can easily state how he feels about someone, but would prefer to express it through his actions. He'd be much more of an acts of service person.

constant gossip/pretentious conceptual conversations:

When I say Sucheon's an gossip, I mean that he shit talks and bitches about anyone to Gangseok all the time. I doubt he'd be very interested in anybody's personal life or rumors, but he loves shit talking people. As for Gangseok, I can see him info dumping about martial arts or something to Sucheon all the time and about the different techniques. Which is good for Gangseok, because fighting is one of the few topics Sucheon doesn't mind hearing about. He finds learning about other association's fighting styles necessary and vaguely interesting.

"borrows" things/the lender:

I think Sucheon wouldn't want nor find any reason to borrow anything from Gangseok, and Gangseok would be more likely to borrow something from Sucheon, though I don't think it'd be often because they both seem to be indivualistic people who rarely don't have what they need. (Sucheon is constantly on his ass trying to get back the things Gangseok "borrowed" from him)

physical affection meter:

Both of them just aren't an fan of it. The most Gangseok can take is probably someone resting on his shoulder or sitting really close to him. The most Sucheon can take is someone being four feet or less to him.

Gift giving meter:

Since I can see Sucheon being more observant, I also think that'd translate to him seeing something that reminds him of the other person and just randomly buying it. I lowkey feel like Gangseok would be an awful gift giver, but would buy gifts to express his affection from time to time.

[wastemanjohn]

Happy DFF China! Sending everyone the same one today. Let’s say somehow, some way, John gets resurrected in the later seasons when Sam & Dean are well into a relationship. How does John react? How does Dean react?

OOF SPICY SPICY thanks Spike

I'm late to the dadfucker party but - I think if there's background johndean I see John, maybe in a way, not being that surprised. He may be not the best father ever but I do think he's aware of it - painfully aware. He'd probably know that it's his fault. Not just for normalising incest - but for setting his boys up to be so insane about each other. I think there'd be a lot of self pity and a lot of drinking lol. A lot of everyone avoiding the topic - until they can't.

How does Dean react? He'd be so mixed up. It's my strongly felt headcanon that Dean feels very differently about John when he's older and ?wiser. John is still his first love. Those feelings are still very much alive and he'll have missed him the whole time. But I think with distance - and in parallel to his canonical realisations about John being Maybe Not That Great - he'd realise at least some of what was so wrong with him having a sexual relationship with his father. Not just as an afterthought, not just "It's wrong but whatever" etc - but genuine epiphanies about John and where the fuck he must have been *at* to go to bed with his own son. Just because you consent to something at some time doesn't mean it can't be utterly traumatising later right - so I think John coming back would bring up A Lot of Stuff for Dean. I see him distancing himself from Sam. I see him feeling very mixed up about everything - that's his Dad who's back, his first love, and Dean still loves him with everything he has but there's all these other layers to it now. It's not this dizzying, beautiful, strange secret thing anymore. Would Dean feel shame too - carrying on the wincest tradition, would he feel that he's let John down because fucking Sam isn't quite protecting him, is it?

I wonder about Sam in this situation too (my samgirl is showing, it always is). I wonder if he'd feel conflicted too. Part of him having forgiven John and wanting that relationship with him, part of him fucked up by all the incest too, and part of him utterly and completely in love with Dean and not wanting to lose him to John again now he's back. Which I think he would somewhat. I don't think John and Dean could act like they never existed. And later seasons Sam might have found a way to be okay with that. Not that he and Dean would "break up," although I'm sure John's return would be... testing lol. Idk. I do think John and Dean would never be able to be the way they once were. Dean isn't the same person in later seasons, John probably wouldn't recognise him actually. They'd never get back what they had. Dean wouldn't feel the same way about it all, and it would be hard for John to confront everything he did to Dean and also the fact that his sons are now basically married. All this to say that it would be some messy shit but ultimately; I think Sam and Dean would remain a Thing and John and Dean would try and fail to be a Thing again and it would be messy af for all involved. I don't know if John would stay around for long.

[terresdebrume]

I reblogged this post the other night and thought it would be an interesting exercise to do with the blorbos, so when I got bored at work I took my dice and rolled a couple numbers. I'll do those with Joe Liebgott, but feel free to send me a number + a blorbo if you want to see something different :)

13. When do they fake a smile? How often?

So I don't think Joe is the type to fake smiles much, if at all, to be honest. If anything, I feel like he's more likely to fake a frown if he doesn't want to show he's amused for whatever reason. But, I think on the rare occasions he fakes a smile, it's because he feels that's what someone needs at that moment.

Maybe it's a scared kid and he's trying to reassure them, maybe his parents are worried about his wellbeing and he wants to assuage their concerns...situations like that, probably exclusively.

25. What subject / topic do they know a lot about that’s completely useless to the direct plot?

So we all know Joe is a big comics nerd (and possibly general SF by extension) which I don't think he broadcasts all that much, but I also like to imagine he's ended up reading a bunch of nonfiction about one scientific concept or another after reading a book and has become surprisingly well acquainted with various aspects of 'hard sciences' like physics or chemistry as a result

30. When they make a mistake and feel bad, does the guilt differ when it’s personal versus when it’s professional?

I think outside of situations like a war where his professional mistakes have dire consequences on others, Joe moves on from them fairly easily. Gave a bad haircut? Man, it grows back, chill out. Same with a hair dye: if it's just a bit of a botched color he probably won't sweat it much. He'll just do better next time.

For personal mistakes, I think it depends a bit on what kind. Like, if he burns a meal or something like that, he'd probably only be irritated until he can figure out some kind of replacement. But if it's a mistake that hurts someone whose feelings he cares about (like botching someone's favorite dish or forgetting to pick them up from the train station for example) he'll tend to get angrier at himself, and sometimes he snaps at the person in question out of embarrassment, and it's even more true the bigger the mistake is.

31. When do they feel the most guilt? How do they respond to it?

I feel like Joe's number one source of guilt is letting people down. I think part of the reason why he doesn't break down in Lansberg until after they have to put the people back in the barracks is because up until then he was helping. He brought hope and help to these people (His people) and so in that moment he both didn't have the time to break down and had the knowledge that he was being useful sustaining him.

The moment they put the prisoners back in the barracks is, I think, the biggest let down he's ever had to inflict on anyone--on the prisoners in front of him, on his principles and notion of what is right, and I think to him also a let down of his own humanity and compassion--so there's no wonder he broke down.

And I do feel like this is a good example of how he responds to guilt in general (because I do think he feels guilty, when they get to the camp, that he didn't get there sooner or do more or better) : if there is a way to fix it, he will set his mind to it and work until its done. But if it can't be fixed, or at least not in a way that he feels he can achieve, I think the guilt can kind of easily bring him down.

[oswaldsleftbicep]

Hello there

Hope you're doing fine? If it's not too much of a bother I would like to ask for some headcanons of married life with the demon Bro's with their mc's (gender neutral)?

married life with lucia, levy, & mefy

i got so excited seeing this ask lemme tell you- also, i wrote this with a more human!au feel as opposed to canon

also, throwback to my proposal hcs, can y'all believe that was two and a half years ago??

genre: fluff

cw: language it's to be expected at this point

Lucia

❧ he's most definitely the breadwinner out of the two of you so he won't mind if you decide to be the trophy spouse; however, if you decide to follow your own career path, he's your number one supporter and most certainly brags about you

❧ omg he's helpless with grocery shopping, please do not send him out on his own. as a matter of fact, don't even take him with you unless you have time to spare cuz mans will get distracted by everything. if for some reason he's the only one able to go run errands, you need to give him the most detailed list ever: brand, exact name of the item, what color container it comes in, etc

❧ can't cook for shit, he just wasn't taught growing up, so most of the food prep comes from you. he'll die before he makes his partner do all the housework, so if you cook then he's washing the dishes

❧ he picks up on other household chores too, most of the time completing them without you having to ask first; he does a great job with it too, but he much prefers to have you help him. he's very much into quality time, so any chance you have to fold laundry or dust the shelves together is taken

❧ just because you're married now doesn't mean dating and celebrating the small stuff comes to an end!! he goes all out for wedding anniversaries, opting to celebrate them biannually at the six months marks. he also remembers when your first date was and when he asked you to be his, and he does a little something special on those days too, like getting you flowers or taking you back to where you had your first date

❧ he likes doing date nights on fridays, usually going to a restaurant or some local attraction like a light show or ice skating. he'll also take you on monthly weekend trips to a different city or to the beach or mountains. as much as he loves going out, he's a big softie for nights in with you doing something like a spa night or game night which can get pretty competitive so watch out lol

❧ he'd definitely want to start a family with you; he grew up with younger siblings so having one or two little ones running around would just be a natural fit for him. because he's so eager for it, the topic is discussed probably before y'all even get married

❧ whether or not you do want kids, he's also keen to getting a pet. he's partial to dogs but will be perfectly fine with any animal you'd like to adopt! be it kids or animals, just having something to raise with you will make him feel fully content in life

❧ when looking for a house, he likes to keep the idea of a growing family in mind and looking for something with enough room and a nice yard to run around in. he's been dreaming of moving into a house with you and combining your belongings and finding the perfect spots for everything. leaves most of the decorating and style choices to you, but best believe he's giving his opinions and being as involved as possible

❧ just imagine painting a room together and getting paint all over each other and play fighting, or spending a late night in a room filled with boxes, eating takeout on the floor, chatting endlessly about the life ahead of you :,)

Levy

❧ in a marriage with him, you'd both have to work to support the finances; he'd probably have some sort of scholarly/academic job or a career in local government, and having one income won't quite be enough to support the two of you comfortably

❧ can't cook very well either, he really did try to learn but he could never get the hang of it and always ends up burning something. much prefers home cooked meals or something on the healthier side, but won't be opposed to some takeout after a hard day at work

❧ he loathes doing housework spoiled brat but he'll be damned if he makes you do everything while he sits back and watches, so he'll take on some of the easier tasks like dusting, folding laundry, or specifically drying the dishes

❧ prefers to only celebrate your annual wedding anniversary, but he makes up for it by going all out and making each one special. he takes his time planning out a trip that would be meaningful for the two of you, or saving up to get a nice gift for you. he also does the same on valentine's day. one thing you'll do on your anniversary tho is pick a book that you've read that the other hasn't, annotate it, and then exchange books to read and add your own annotations to it. there's a bookshelf designated for these books only so they can stay together

❧ he's great with grocery shopping, always remembers what y'all need even without a list. you trust him enough to send him out alone, you know he'll always get the brands you like and what variant you prefer. he's also like incredible at budgeting and finding a bargain which is so necessary in this economy. tries to stick to what's on the list, so if you try to sneak in anything extra he'll give you the mom stare but eventually give in and allow you one (1) treat

❧ prefers nights in over date nights out, so the two of you will often stay on the couch and watch a movie or pick a book and read it together. if these get boring, he also enjoys completing difficult puzzles with you or playing mystery themed games. for out of the house dates, the two of you will often visit historical sites or museums; you frequent these places so often that you probably have memberships to them

❧ y'all likely opt for a modest home that's cozy enough for the two of you until the discussion of starting a family comes about. he'll most likely want kids, but it won't be for a little bit into y'all's marriage. until then, you keep pets to fill the house with a little more life. he's partial to cats or a more independent animal, but won't fight you on getting a dog, although he makes it perfectly clear that you are the one taking care of it

❧ one of the first things he does when you move into your new home is map out where to put your library lmao but other than that, he's actually really helpful in decorating and choosing paint and furniture. his preferred decor style is like a history professor's poorly lit office, so the house can look a bit,, cluttered at times, but the way you set everything up makes it easy for the two of you to navigate

❧ will take any opportunity he gets to call you by his last name or refer to you as his spouse, and he has the most sickeningly sweet expression every time he does

Mefy

❧ the two of you decide to split the finances and each have a career. the funny thing is, though, you have no idea what he does for a living. every time you ask him he's so vague with his answers that you eventually just stop asking. if anyone else asks, you just tell them that he works in an office or does freelancing. sure, it's concerning and quite frankly irritating that he won't tell you,, but you don't think you'd wanna know what he actually does,,

❧ he's not a big fan of running errands- he claims it's because he's too busy but he really just doesn't like the hassle- but if you ask early enough he'll go with you. make him push the cart. he hates it but just manipulate him by saying you're the one who made the list and therefore know what to grab, it's only fair he pushes the cart for you. he is good at finding bargains, tho, as well as hidden gem brands that you've never heard of before but are actually way better than what you've been getting

❧ outright refuses to do the dishes. the most he'll do is load/unload the dishwasher, but that's only if you ask nicely and he's in a good mood. leaves you to do the cooking too, but only early on in your marriage because he just,, doesn't know how to cook. he learns by watching you, but if you don't know how to cook very well either then the two of you will just learn together! it's one of the few sweet domestic moments you have with him regularly. don't worry, he picks up the slack by doing other household chores like dusting, vacuuming, and laundry

❧ he's so weird with anniversaries, even before marriage. he only celebrates the big milestone ones, like wedding anniversary and he'll even continue celebrating your old dating anniversary. he thinks celebrating smaller anniversaries like first kiss or even being married for six months is dumb, but that doesn't mean he forgets about them. instead he'll bring it up casually during dinner and ngl it shocks you that he remembers so much. he opts to plan something small and intimate for anniversaries, thinking that going all out is a waste of energy

❧ the two of you will not call it a day until you've had your nightly debriefing where y'all talk about your day, what went good, what was bad, who said what, etc. this rolls over into your weekly bitch sessions where the two of you stay in, have a self care session, nurse a drink of your choosing, and just straight gossip and speculate

❧ if you want kids, that's gonna have to be a serious discussion with him and there's gonna have to be a lot of planning going into it. he never really saw himself having children, it's very high maintenance, but with time, planning, and a lot of reassurance, he'll grow fonder of the idea. pets are perfectly okay with him, tho he does prefer something on the more cleanly and low maintenance side

❧ when it comes to moving house, he'd prefer something on the smaller side, a great contrast to what he's used to. he'd love an older house too, something with soul and character. he secretly has a blast picking out paint colors and furniture with you, but he's so unbearably picky about everything. he has a very specific set of taste and style, and he's not willing to compromise on much

❧ there's probably gonna be a lot of petty arguing with this one over,, pretty much anything, but it's all in good humor and never with bad intentions. for the most part, being married to him is no different than how it was dating him, only with more responsibility

[the-firebird69]

We have to work on some stuff here yes but we have a war and we have to work on that right now

-the foreigners and Max and us are surrounding the nuclear bunkers and stashes and Cashsius down below and top side and in the air and space and Trump can't get there at all and he realized it no he's sending troops and you sending a lot of them and it's going to be a hell of a day he is having trouble trying to figure out what to do and he is in trouble this huge armies at his stuff and he is trapped without arms his cities are going to be under siege in a minute he'll have to pursue his stashes and cashes. This brings us to a slightly different topic and it is about him attacking to our daughter and trying to kidnap her he's going to try and grab her with the fleet and he'll be looked at as a dummy and that's what he is he's a stupid a****** we've been trying to tell you that so his orders might not be followed and he might be removed from here by his own people or they'll just die and our son says they're going to die weasel get some to do it somehow and we are going to watch and make sure that our daughter is fine but we do see what he's saying that this guy is a complete jackass we also have information that says he is going to be on his way to court today on top of what he's been doing here bothering people it has created a problem for himself elsewhere and people are going to go after him in court and it is for all sorts of things that people would not suspect he would go to court for one of them is he has been pandering to everybody and it is a crime to do and it is a series of crimes and they don't call it pandering false representation and you're doing a lot of fraud and things like that but it's a certain way of doing it and tries to make it legal and it is not legal and it's not right and we do not approve of him trying it and we don't approve of anybody helping it happen at all in any way we are opposed to his pandering and we're going to make a point of people noting that they should not be doing it we have several other things that were going to do today but these are huge and we mean apprehending these people here and Trump for his crimes they're going to go after them right now

Thor Freya

Olympus

Good it's about time this dumb fleet needs to leave and you say they're going to try and grab me and I want to know that people are on it

Hera

We are on it we have a lot of fleets out there. We have enough to cover the pseudo empire and more meaning if they turn in billy z turned we would have it. And these guys are not a match for us but you are right we have to make sure we have a covered so we're moving out right now

Thor Freya

I'm going to have more shortly we do need it and we need it to happen was saying the 31st but that would be when Billy z was pulling out everything so anytime this week the action might start and people thought it was yesterday A lot of people but there could be a lot of people moving out what I said was to take a week to do really it might take a few a little bit more time it's going to simply fizzle and it will disappear so that's something to consider we are also pulling ships out when other people do just coming up pretty quick before mostly during and a lot after thinking to be chaos

..

Good that is a good explanation and we have additional was nice

Hera

Olympus

[squorttle-pox]

Originally posted by mirayrex so check out their post + notes delving deeper into the theory, but here's my take on it:

okay so BASICALLY (not basic at all) in the good omens theory community people are very suspect of mx metatron and his silly little intervention coming down to earth in CORPOREAL FORM??? WHAAAAAT which is completely unnecessary if all he wanted to do is propose an idea to Azi, if he only wanted to offer the Archangel position. But nooooo, he CAME ALL THE WAY DOWN. The Literal Metatron, above any Archangel and second only to the Almighty herself,, came to earth to ask Aziraphale if hey you wanna be important again??

No. Just no. That is not innocent behaviour. That is not Good Deeds or Politeness. He is Up To Something TM and I wonder what it is....

Motive:

1. "People will begin to suspect there's something wrong with the system" — A quote (taken from memory) by Baseall Fanatic about the same bad thing happening in Heaven twice: sending an Archangel to Hell (instead they erase memories and demote); two "opposing" entities falling in love and running away together (Crowley wanted to do this with Azi both before and after Bureaucracy head off to Alpha Centuri, running away from their respective offices to live on Earth, would have been cemented after Crowley confessed). Mettie had to stop a Repeat Incident. He had to split them up, and he knows Crowley would never come back to Heaven. Essentially, this is the perfect Mettle-Tron plot to get what he wants regardless of anyone else's wishes and as a high-ranking entity there is no way he'll let it fail. And Aziraphale being Aziraphale, there's no way he would agree to it of his own free will. Something had to happen.

Proof:

2. "Almond syrup" — Classic cyanide flavour + in E3 we see the unusual effects that poisons have on these entities

3. "Does anyone ever ask for death" — Very sussy conversation topic especially with how persistent he is on "asking for death", implying that might be what he is doing ("humans are so predictable" --> as a non-human he will be UNpredictable and murder a bitch). Meta gave him coffee AND death

4. "DRINK IT DRINK IT DRINK THE DRINK BEFORE WE TALK" — The Mets was adamant that Azi should drink the coffee immediately like "oh aren't you gonna drink it" RIGHT AFTER GIVING IT, wanted to WATCH Azi drink it to confirm, before Crowley got to have him alone and before they had their "conversation"

5. "Miracle SFX" — Some people claim they can hear the miracle sound effect when New York hand the coffee off to Zira

6. "El Look" — Everyone had to have noticed that sinister look + music the Old Hag of God gave to Crowley when he led Azi away for their "talk"

7. "Take the shop" — Bombastic Old Guy entrusts the bookshop to Muriel BEFORE Zira officially gets the position, even with all the extra time he had to think and discuss it w the LOHL Metatron is still 100% convinced Zira will say yes

8. "6000 years of pining" — Smitten, remember. SMITTEN. Azi is so damn smitten he is head over heels over head again in love with Crowley, loves him exactly how he is and as much as their personalities contrast he has never expressed any wish for him to change. The whole idea is that they're attracted to each other BECAUSE of those differences. Then all of a sudden Aziraphale is begging and pressuring Crowley to return to the PLACE THAT TRIED TO KILL THEM, going back to his old black and white views of good/bad, singing Heaven's praises like he didn't even properly do thousands of years ago when he WAS on Heaven's side (see E2 when he admits he doesn't agree w all of their orders). Crowley isn't good. He isn't an angel. He identifies himself as a demon (even if he's totally pure and precious and brilliant and–) so being asked to become an angel again is asking him to forego his entire self, his ideals, his Life. Aziraphale knows him too well, loves him too much, to demand that of someone he unconditionally adores.

9. "I thought we carved it our for ourselves" — When Azi knows Crowley doesn't want to help him w Gabriel because Trauma and Asshole Angelness, he clearly says he WANTS help but also unleashes his sassy cunt self to say he understands that if Crowley doesn't want to, then Crowley won't. He's pissed but he understands and he knows and he doesn't expect Crowley to change his mind, change the part of him that resents everything Heaven. And we're expected to believe he all of a sudden 180s and wants Crowley to sacrifice everything he's built for a realliance with an enemy??? After all the trouble they went to for their own slice of Earthly paradise, Aziraphale would never abandon Earth💙 or Humans👶 or Crowley🥰 for Heaven🤮

So I just finished session two of good omens… owie my emotions

[lale-txt]

🍑 online dating headcanons: Straw Hat Pirates

[part 1 w/ Whitebeard pirates] [part 2 w/ Supernovas]

a/n: i've written Luffy & Zoro in part 2 already, but wanted to do the rest of the crew still hehe. again VERY SORRY if i accidentally roasted your favorite, i'm not wrong though

Robin

hot milfs in your area want YOU

not she though

i'm sorry

Robin has this effortless beauty that makes her look good in every. single. photo.

it's unfair but she's just built different

she collects matches like cute little stickers in a sticker album, chuckling a little when a new one gets added to the collection

will make the most blunt small talk feel like deep talk, as if you stripped down to your soul, offering it to her completely

there are only few topics you can spark her real interest in, but she will still be polite and pretend she's interested in everything you say

she will find the most charming excuses to not meet up for a date offline

"sorry, i can't, my pet opossum needs emergency surgery"

and next thing you see is her posting on socials how she's living her best life on the Sunny, getting served sweet treats by Sanji and possibly snogging Franky (she deserves it though)

Franky

buys the premium versions of every dating apps for endless SUUUPERRR LIKES

his photo is him in the little red speedos and a ridiculous hair do that still suits him surprisingly well (maybe braids that cover his nipples)

he's the one that texts first for sure, not wasting any time

will definitely mention that he's able to vibrate in his bio, making vibrator sales on the Grand Line reach a new low because everyone wants him only

very relatable though, i would want to try that too

fun to chat with, even though if you don't end up meeting you can still save his number for ages for a spontaneous booty call, he doesn't mind

will send you a light signal with nipple beams if you can't find him out there

Sanji

a casanova on every app

yes he has installed them ALL (for range, honey)

his profile picture is him in the kitchen, chopping 'a little something' up but it's a whole 10 course menu ("oh, that? that's nothing... wait till you see what's on the menu for you WINK")

all the foodies in his radius are obsessed with him, trying to match him for a date

i would, too

he asked Franky or Usopp if they can build him a device that constantly swipes right for him, he can't miss a possible match and is getting cramps in his right hand from all the swiping

chain smoking from the stress of replying them all until he drops his phone into the soup one day

he takes it as a sign that maybe he isn't made for online dating and will try his luck offline again

Nami

from cat burglar to catfish in just three days!

Nami is sweet but would definitely try to rip her matches off all their money

at least the cis men

she's having more fun on the lesbian dating apps anyway

"it's called reparations, look it up"

very big flirt, very stunning photos, her wanted poster too of course for some extra attention

good luck keeping her entertained for more than three sentences though until she's moving on to the next one

get in line bestie

Usopp

your local indie soft boy

are you matching Usopp or Sogeking? you'll never know

goes by the slogan 'a little white lie here and there won't do harm'

please hold the line for 2-5 business days while he will handcraft a personality to match yours

will tell you about all the sweet date ideas he has with you that will make you fall head over heels in love with him without ever meeting him

all of that aside i think he is a pleasure to match with

he's gentle and caring, will never ghost you, probably has the best memes and not just another fuckboi

Jinbe

his online dating profile is very dad-like

which also means he will respond to everything with "👍" or "okay"

hang in there bestie, he is much more fun to talk to offline

Robin took a nice photo of him that he will use on EVERY app, one where he smirks a little in his best kimono

though he'll probably delete every app quick once he gets flooded with thirsty messages if it's true that sharks have two dicks

they do

will rather look offline for a partner but still give everyone of the crew advice on the do's and don't of dating apps like a worried parent

Brook

"looking for something to bone?"

banned from every platform for harassing everyone about their panties :(

[nkakeru]

𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙡𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙪𝙖𝙜𝙚: 𝙦𝙪𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙮 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚

; 🍘 — matsuno chifuyu, kawata souya & kawa nahoya (written together but not poly), sano manjiro, sano emma, hanemiya kazutora, tachibana hinata, tachibana naoto, ryuguji ken, sano shinichiro

; 🧾 — fluff, timeskip!characters (all), sfw, spoiler-free, reader insert, established relationship, gn! reader, happy!au

one | two | three | four

CHIFUYU is always asking you to spend some time with him. It may be reading manga, playing with cats, watching a movie, or walking around. He also enjoys physical touch, so during this time he always looks for an opportunity to hold your hand or cuddle. Honestly, the only time doesn't want you around is when he's fighting someone because he's afraid that someone might go after you to get to him.

neither SOUYA nor NAHOYA are the type to plan ahead. They send you a text asking if you want to meet to watch a movie in 30 minutes. Oh, you busy? Fine, they'll go to your place/ work to stay with you while you do whatever you have to do - but they want your attention, and neither smiley nor angry can stay quiet for long, so they might distract you.

MIKEY is another that shows up at your workplace out of nowhere, asking if you can leave earlier. He knows you can't, but he still asks - and since you can't leave with him, he'll wait for you, probably falling asleep somewhere. After you finish, he takes you for a ride and to eat something. He also likes when you hang out with his friends, even if he's scared to put you at risk letting you be seen with members of a gang.

Like her brother, EMMA enjoys staying around you even if you're not doing the same thing. You may not study the same thing at college, but that's not a reason for her to not have study dates! Do you want to finish a book? Ok, she'll put on her headphones and watch an episode of a tv show laid close to you. Besides that, she's always planning coffee and shopping dates.

KAZUTORA stayed a long time unable to go out, so now he wants to enjoy everything with you. He has a different place to go each weekend even if your wallet doesn't support it. He'll take you to amusement parks, new restaurants or (when neither of you can spend much money) order takeout for you to eat at his house or do a picnic at a nice park.

HINATA sees every opportunity as a date. Are you going grocery shopping together? It's a date. Did you meet at the pharmacy out of pure chance because you needed a new shampoo and she was buying medicine for Naoto? Wow, surprise date! She just really enjoys your presence and how you never seem to run out of conversation topics, so even when she's hanging out with her friends, she asks them if you can tag along.

NAOTO will come up with amazing ideas to spend time with you. He has a lot of work to do? Not a problem, he'll ask if he can do it at your house or if you can come to do whatever you have to do at his house (now, imagine him all happy explaining something he just found out about a crime organization to you). To him, eating together it's the best thing, it's so domestic and makes him feel like you're a married couple.

KEN likes dates such as going to an arcade or out to eat, but it hits different when you're around each other doing your own stuff. It's like your life works together and you complete each other. For example when he's working and you stay close by studying or reading. Even better is when one of you had a shitty day and the other just knows what to do, like speaking in a lower voice and playing with each other's hair.

SHINICHIRO is always finding ways to meet you. Did you mention you need to go out to buy some medicine? Oh, what a coincidence, he has it in his house, he can bring it to you - shocking news: he doesn't have it, he'll go buy it and bring it to you so he can see you and find a way to stay around for a little while. Are you studying? No problem, he'll take a nap on the sofa, just wake him when you finish. If he's working, he's always inviting you to pass by so you can get lunch/ dinner together.