#and then he has his larger already formed ones

[peppermintquartz]

It's not the first time he's done this but, naively, Tommy did hope that last year would have been the last. Now he scribbles his name with a little more fervor than necessary, almost tearing the page.

He was only deluding himself, he knows now. It is his fate to fill in the gaps, to go where he's needed in the moment, but he isn't the desired destination.

It stings, though. He was selfishly hoping for more time, enough so that he already ordered a tree to be delivered along with some decorations. Fairy lights, star topper, blue and red and gold baubles. Presumptuous of him, it turns out.

He also has a list of presents he was going to buy, based on what he remembers from conversations: a larger toolbox for Eddie, a Mythbusters DVD box set for Karen, a year's subscription to the Lancet for Hen, new grilling skewers for Bobby, a spa weekend in Vegas for Athena, a 126-color washable crayon set for Jee-yun, a weekend couples tour in Vegas for Chimney and Maddie that he'll fly them to.

He hasn't bought the gifts yet, except for Evan's: a customized chef's knife. Japanese craftsmanship.

He wonders if Evan will want to use it at all, knowing it's from Tommy.

Lucy looks at him askance when she sees the list. When she opens her mouth to ask, he shakes his head. Her mouth twists into a sympathetic grimace, then she pats his arm and walks away.

The fact is that most of them have noticed that Tommy was lighter and happier, for the past six months. Now he's withdrawn and monosyllabic.

He'll move on. He has to. He can't dwell on one single man whose bright blue eyes haunt his dreams and waking moments. He can't. Even if looking at the blue skies perfect for flying reminds him of the worst heartbreak he ever inflicted on himself.

---

But he's not allowed to move on, it seems.

Christmas Eve, he's on duty and the one major call the 217 goes to is a seven-car pile-up that blocks three lanes of traffic.

And the one man he never wants to see hurt is bleeding out behind the wheel, barely hanging on to consciousness, his fingers weak when asked to squeeze Tommy's hand.

"Fancy... seeing you... here," Evan mumbles.

"Stop talking," Tommy orders. He's frantic, even if he and his colleagues move methodically and rapidly to clear away the metal trapping the man he loves - the man he loves - inside a metal cage (not a coffin, Kinard, not a goddamn coffin) while he bleeds seemingly everywhere.

He's not going to fly the chopper, he knows. The second they were told that off-duty firefighter Buckley is in the accident, Tommy's captain made the call that any air transport is to be carried out by Lucy.

"Hang on, baby, please," he begs. He doesn't care who hears him. "Evan, please, stay awake, please stay awake-"

"I'm glad," Evan says. His eyes are fluttering shut. "'s good... Not Buck. J-just Evan." He slumps over.

Tommy doesn't waste time screaming or crying. He practically rips aside the crushed door with his hands alone, even though his shoulders burn from exertion, and he helps get Evan out for the paramedics, and he is running to the bird right next to the stretcher, hauling Evan on board. No one tells him he's to stay on the ground.

---

Maddie and Chimney finds him in the waiting area.

"You're pregnant," Tommy says stupidly as he stands up when he sees them.

"How is he?" she asks.

"Still inside." Tommy can't really form thoughts. "He crashed once but his heart was beating when we got here."

Maddie nods and sits down. Chimney sits beside her and they hold hands. They are already there for each other; they do not need anything to bridge a gap.

Tommy wants to throw up. He sits down, two chairs away, and buries his face in his hands.

The last time he prayed was in a church that claimed that God will smite people like him. Yet, he begs whatever entity will listen: Please, take me in his stead. He has a family who loves him. Who need him. Take me in his stead. He deserves everything good. Take me in his stead.

Christmas Eve ticks over to Christmas.

More and more of Evan's friends and family come. Eddie doesn't show; Hen tells Tommy that Eddie is in Texas. Tommy only nods at her. He says nothing. They cluster around Maddie and gives Chimney hugs.

Then Bobby sits next to Tommy and squeezes his knee. He murmurs, "He still misses you. Apologize and make it up to him."

"I bought Evan a chef's knife," Tommy says, apropos of nothing.

Bobby huffs. "He'll prefer having you back as a present." Another pause. "That, and couples therapy."

Tommy bites his lip and nods. Anything. He'll do anything.

---

The next Christmas, Tommy doesn't take on a shift. Neither does Evan.

They're hosting Christmas lunch.

Tommy adding his name to the "can work double shifts if needed over Christmas" list because he'll only be spending it alone. Again.

[queereads-bracket]

Queer Adult SFF Books Bracket: Round 1

Book summaries and submitted endorsements below:

The Last Binding trilogy (A Marvellous Light, A Restless Truth, A Power Unbound) by Freya Marske

Endorsement from submitter #1: "A trilogy of books set in a magical Edwardian England, the Last Binding series focuses on three queer couples who come together in order to solve a conspiracy threatening all magic. It’s a masterful blending of fantasy, historical fiction, and romance, with a splash of mystery and Wodehousian romp. Expect magical manor house parties with beautiful wallpaper, as well as explorations of power, trust, and what we owe the land. The prose is absolutely gorgeous and evocative. The characters and their emotional arcs form the beating heart of the story, intertwined with beautifully crafted romance. The worldbuilding feels organic and deeply rooted within this hidden magical society. These books are thoughtful, tender, scorching, and fun all at once."

Endorsement from submitter #2: "Utterly fantastic historical fantasy. Each book focuses on a subset of a larger character set. There is an overarching high stake magical plot, as well as different queer romances explored in each individual book."

Robin Blyth has more than enough bother in his life. He’s struggling to be a good older brother, a responsible employer, and the harried baronet of a seat gutted by his late parents’ excesses. When an administrative mistake sees him named the civil service liaison to a hidden magical society, he discovers what’s been operating beneath the unextraordinary reality he’s always known.

Now Robin must contend with the beauty and danger of magic, an excruciating deadly curse, and the alarming visions of the future that come with it—not to mention Edwin Courcey, his cold and prickly counterpart in the magical bureaucracy, who clearly wishes Robin were anyone and anywhere else.

Robin’s predecessor has disappeared, and the mystery of what happened to him reveals unsettling truths about the very oldest stories they’ve been told about the land they live on and what binds it. Thrown together and facing unexpected dangers, Robin and Edwin discover a plot that threatens every magician in the British Isles—and a secret that more than one person has already died to keep.

Fantasy, historical fiction, romance, magic, Edwardian, series, adult

Winter's Orbit by Everina Maxwell

Endorsement from submitter: "Gay princes in space"

While the Iskat Empire has long dominated the system through treaties and political alliances, several planets, including Thea, have begun to chafe under Iskat's rule. When tragedy befalls Imperial Prince Taam, his Thean widower, Jainan, is rushed into an arranged marriage with Taam's cousin, the disreputable Kiem, in a bid to keep the rising hostilities between the two worlds under control.

But when it comes to light that Prince Taam's death may not have been an accident, and that Jainan himself may be a suspect, the unlikely pair must overcome their misgivings and learn to trust one another as they navigate the perils of the Iskat court, try to solve a murder, and prevent an interplanetary war... all while dealing with their growing feelings for each other.

Science fiction, romance, arranged marriage, politics, mystery, adult

[grape-juice-explosion-murder]

More of my adult Mineta design for the soul.

[nyxaffixed]

What if Narinder accidentally marrried the Lamb

(I have no idea if this has been done already, but i cant stop thinking about this)

In lamb culture, gifting jewelry signifies a relationship between the gifter and the reciever. Depending on where the jewelry is worn, it signifies the type of relationship formed.

Gold given by family is to be strung on the horns, or woven into the wool on the head. These are more permanent and intricate, with larger pieces being passed down family lines. Marriages are usually sealed with a ceremonial exchange of this type of jewelry.

Close friends give things that will be worn on the hands and arms. Small tokens that can be swapped out when friendships come and go.

Tokens from those outside of friends and family are usually charms that can be affixed to staffs and clothing, or placed around the house to be admired from afar.

Those that have been slighted put the respective jewelry affixed to the end of robes and staffs, or tied to the ankles, to metaphorically and physically drag that person through the dirt.

Only lovers exchange jewelry for the neck, and each piece is symbolic. It is tradition to propose with a bell, of which the quality is reflective to the love of the giver. Higher quality bells chime the most beautifully, and have a unique sound.

When The Lamb was given their bell, it was flawless, for it had been handcrafted by a god. When the Red crown was fitted on their head, the marriage was sealed. The Lamb did not protest, for who were they to deny their god? They were executed, engaged, married, and resurrected all in the span of a few mintues; loving their sudden husband came just as quick.

The one who waits was not suprised by his vessel's unflinching devotion to him. He accepted the golden jewelry they showered him with, as offerings were expected. He humored their honeyed compliments and long winded ramblings; they fought harder and worked longer when he'd done so.

The one who waits was completely surprised, when upon their betrayal, he still felt devotion from them. The Lamb still loved their husband, even if Narinder had no idea they've been married for the past 250 years.

[zuzuelectricbugaloo]

@howlsofbloodhounds @toffeebrews struggling with WIPs right now but you never fail to inspire/got me thinking about Colorkiller again so I did a blurb to be free:

Color watches as Killer glides towards him. Though he is uneasy, uncertain of what to expect due to his habibi’s inclination to unpredictability, he is unafraid.

No matter what, Killer is his friend. Color means him no harm. Never has, never will.

Killer drew closer. His expression is blanketed in shadow. Still Color remains, undeterred. He would do everything in his power to prove himself, prove that he was worth his mettle and his words were Soul-formed and true.

Something he hoped one day Killer would accept as fact.

Killer already had, the moment Color had held his abomination of a Soul and all Killer could feel and taste was Color’s besotted adoration

The Killer’s steps are silent, every movement slow and at cautious ease. He moves with the grace of a predator, the roll of his shoulders and the ease in his light steps not unlike a feline.

His footsteps are silent. Were it not for the crimson staining the ground, one would think he had floated and not walked.

Killer’s knife disappears in a series of sanguine pixels.

He comes to a stop before Color, close enough that their scant disparity in height is evident in the way Killer’s skull tilts upward, empty sockets as insidious and unfathomably beautiful as the infinite abyss of space.

Killer is silent, but Color knows well to let Killer be the one to make the first move, and the dragon bound by bone stands in content patience.

Scarred claws stained iniquitous crimson reach up to cradle the sides of skull. Copper floods his nasal aperture and the back of his mind murmurs they ought to move somewhere less exposed, but he has eye only for Killer.

Color leans into the hold and is unable to resist his socket drooping half-shut, nor the pleased rumble of a purr deep in his chest when Killer’s sharp thumb gingerly traces his zygomas.

This close, he can smell beyond the blood and sweat and dirt sweet and alluring, familiar and comforting rose.

His hands rest at his sides. He slowly brings them up, and when Killer doesn’t protest nor reflect bodily dislike, Color rests his larger, thicker (but blunt) claws over Killer’s slender and sharp ones that cradle his face.

Color bends slightly forward to rest his foreskull against Killer’s as they continued to watch one another but is mindful of his distance to prevent any accidental bump into Killer’s hovering Soul. So close, that Color can see clearly how Killer’s sockets are stained grey with his onyx tears but they do not leak. And he can see the faded yet present ring of grey that rests in his right socket.

It’s that same pearlescent eyelight that watches Color as he gazes back in return as Killer tilts his skull so and so, side to side, but never far enough to break them apart.

Killer is so close that when he murmurs, “Beautiful,” he can feel his breath, warm against his bones while his eyelight sears into Color.

His cheekbones burn iridescent mana as deep affection stirs dangerously in his warm Soul. His throat feels tight and his tongue heavy when he softly replies, “You are.”

Hands stained with the blood of countless slain, now gently hold Color as though he is the hoard, a priceless treasure meant to be coveted, something precious and cared for.

For one such as Killer to feel so deeply whilst struggling to feel or understand emotions, it was a priceless gift he had no intention of squandering.

He’d rather die than not appreciate the gift of being loved by him

It’s why he doesn’t resist when Killer rolls slightly onto his toes to lean up and press his mouth against Color’s, it’s why he lets his eye close and removes his hands from Killer’s to cradle his slender face in turn. And it’s why he lets Killer pull him ever closer until he’s brushed against his now cordate Soul.

Gentle, Killer yearns toward him just as Color yearns for him, the fervent and intimate twining of Color’s flames and Killer’s Soul blending and echoing the ardor reflected within every gentle touch and tender caress. Warm and bright, with the scent of roses blooming and blood in fallen snow he feels electric velvet light him from the inside out.

When Killer licks into his mouth and he tastes sanguine on his tongue, Color doesn’t care in the slightest.

Because the hands soaked in unfathomable quantities of blood now chose to cradle him.

killer should be so endlessly fascinated by color he has a hard time looking away he doesn’t wanna miss a single thing he should tenderly hold colors face and tilt his head from side to side to observe every angle of him and then call him beautiful

[hurlingdown]

HOW TO BREAK A MONSTER — TOP MALE READER X ZORO

synopsis. you've heard rumours that roronoa zoro is an unlovable monster. someone whose heart cannot be touched. maybe that is so—but maybe there is a way to feel the pounding of his heart. if you cannot reach him through his chest, then you'll just have to find a better way. (through his stomach) wc. 0.8k

tags. sub! zoro, dom! reader. huge cock, belly bulge, tummy pushing, feminization, tit-slapping, womb-fucking (metaphorical), gagging on fingers.

“Can you feel me in there?” 

There’s a dome-shaped outline of your cock shifting inside him, making the muscles jut out from his abdomen. 

Zoro shudders, barely able to form words. Nods a yes, maybe. It’s hard to tell. 

“Words, baby.” 

Spreading one hand wide over him, you move to palm the soft pouch beneath his navel, kneading into the fat there. Lightly pressing onto the bulge, letting him feel you. 

He tips his head back to let out a breathy moan. “Hah. Full—’s too full.” It doesn’t sound like a complaint to you. A plea, maybe, but not a complaint. 

You hum, satisfied, leaning back to lazily fuck into him. One inch out, one inch in. Lube and cum squelch, caking to form a creamy ring around the base of your cock. 

“You can take more. Can’t you, Zoro?” It isn’t much of a taunt, but one thing about Zoro is that he hates to lose. 

Denial is on the tip of his tongue. It would be so easy to submit to you, to forfeit. You would pull out and suck him off, or maybe finger him to completion. Those are also fun, he supposes—everything with you is fun, really. But giving up a challenge directed at him? Now that isn’t fun. 

So he tells you, more smugly than he feels, “Yeah. Keep going.” 

It would be easier to pretend if you weren’t currently trying to carve yourself into his womb. 

“That’s my good boy,” you murmur, cupping the side of his face. A thumb pushes between his lips, and he parts them eagerly, letting you press the pad of it against the back of his tongue. He doesn’t choke, has a negligible gag reflex. Grins up at you the best he can with your fingers in his mouth, showing you his sharp teeth. 

You push your cock deeper inside and the bulge grows larger in turn, making his belly almost round. Each time he thinks yeah, this is it, you push a little more inside, take up a little more space. It isn’t until he’s slobbering and panting with your fingers gagging him, fisting at the sheets above his shoulders, that you stop. 

Taking your wet fingers out, you smear the saliva over his face, and he gives a shuddering whine. You trail a hand down to fondle his tits, the plump flesh spilling out from between your fingers, buds swollen from being roughly played with earlier. 

“It’s a shame we can’t make these bigger, like down here.” You punctuate your sentence with an angled roll of your hips, the fat head of your cock poking out from his tummy. “What a sight that’d be, mm. You’d look like a woman.” 

Oh, well. They were already plenty. 

“Shut up,” he seethes breathlessly. “You talk too much.” 

Despite his words, you watch in amusement as pre-cum dribbles down the length of his hard cock, arousal heavy in the way it curves and flushes. At least his body’s being honest. The poor thing looks as though it were begging for release, twitching uselessly on his stomach. You want to flick it, fuck a finger into the slit, make him cry with overstimulation. 

“I don’t appreciate your attitude.” 

Without warning, you slap his tit, hard, branding it with a red handprint, and his glare locks into you in silent defiance. There’s a glint in his eye that tells you this is what he’s been looking for. 

“Why,” he drawls with a smirk, “am I too much for you to handle?” 

You smile. It was almost pitiful. 

“You’re asking the right question. Unfortunately, to the wrong person.” 

Pressing both of your hands into his belly, you thrust your hips against him, forcing him to take you deeper into his womb despite the heavy strain from above. Zoro sobs out, shivering as he’s completely impaled on your cock, huge girth making it fit even if it should be impossible. 

His nails dig into your forearms, and you spare him a glance. 

The sight makes your heart flutter.  

If sex was a person, you think, this would be it. There are tears dotting at his lashes, and a line of drool runs down the side of his face. He’s too fucked-out to use his own words, only shaking his head and mindlessly mouthing “more”. You take the opportunity to gag him with your fingers but he only sucks them obediently, unable to think. 

So this is what it feels like to take a monster apart. masterlist!

[kisakis-boyfriend]

Dazai, Chuuya, & Kunikida x werewolf reader

Author's Note: Requested by the same anon who asked for this with Fyodor, Nikolai, & Sigma. I just had to break up the posts thanks to tumblr's tag limits 🙄 + bonus Kunikida because I can ✨

Pairings: Dazai, Chuuya, & Kunikida x male reader (separately)

Warnings: Male werewolf!reader, dom/top!reader, sub/bottom!characters, implied dom Chuuya as well, mentions of breeding, knotting, rough sex (Chuuya), heat cycle, Dazai calls you 'belladonna'

Dazai

The Shameless Slut

“Ooh please fill me up, my love! I'll gladly take all of your dick uwu”

Yeah, Dazai can get a little too excited about your werewolf form sometimes…

He can be such a pillow princess too. He just likes to lay there and show off his beautiful body while you're carving your place in his insides

Scarily possessive when you pop your knot into him

As soon as Dazai feels that sudden stretch, he's locking his legs around you and pressing it further in

His fingers tangle in your coarse fur, and a groan slips out–

“Yes! Tell me I'm yours, belladonna!” he'll rasp, staring you down with enough intensity to make your heart skip a beat

If you're comfortable with it, Dazai will brag about his insanely hot werewolf boyfriend

Rip ADA members who have to hear about you every single day… and rip PM members who also hear about Dazai's horny bf every time they meet 😅

Chuuya

The Greedy Slut

That's not your massive dick, it's Chuuya's. And you'd do well to remember that

Your werewolf form does something to Chuuya's brain. The man already enjoys rough sex, but this large, canine form stirs something up in his belly

Demands to be bred. There better be no cum spillage, it has to be in his hole(s)

Definitely uses his special ability to make you hit deeper and pound harder — so much so that it's caused Chuuya to pass out before

After that first time, Chuuya asked if you kept going. And when you said of course not, he looked rather disappointed 😟

From then on, you agreed to breed him whether he was still conscious or not (within reason, though)

Calls you 'good puppy' and similar affectionate terms

You two have had conversations about buying a collar and leash — and, if you choose to incorporate that into your sex life, you won't regret it. Chuuya will make very good use of them 😏

Kunikida

The Slut in Denial

Also a total denial slut

He would never admit to this even on his deathbed; but Kunikida loves edging

If you lick the underside of his cock with your rough canine tongue, growling at your beloved to hold it all in? The only thing Kunikida will have in his vision are stars swirling around

I don't think he would admit to loving your primal sex sessions either. Not unless he was already deep in sub space

On all fours, your larger form hunched over his body while your balls slap against Kunikida's ass, your fur tickling his back — this is when he'd slur out how much he loves taking your cock 💛

Also one to keep track of the moon's cycle. It's important to know when his partner will transform or go into heat

Dating a werewolf was never a part of his ideals, but he doesn't regret a thing

Becoming your mate has improved Kuni's life in all sorts of ways — whether we're talking about the amount of love he receives, or the benefits of nasty werewolf sex 😌

[serpentandlily]

Now That We Don't Talk

Part I

Now That We Don’t Talk - Azriel x Reader

Summary: Dealing with the aftermath of your mate’s betrayal.

Warnings: major angst, mentions of grief and loss, mention of infidelity 

a/n: this has a happy ending, I promise! I’d also like to mention that I never usually blame the woman when a man cheats, but in this case, both parties knew of the existing relationship and bond so *death to all of them* lol jk…for now…I hope this lives up to your expectations!

────────────

“That’s it, Y/n,” Madja said, taking a step backwards as she carefully monitored you between two support beams. “Go slow.”

Your shoulders and arms were straining as you held yourself up using the two beams, slowly raising your foot to take another step forward. You groaned at the pain, feeling flustered and embarrassed that walking was taking you so much effort. 

Cassian and Nesta had turned one of the larger chambers in the House of Wind into a physical remedial room. You had sessions in here every day with Madja, Cassian almost always there with you and in times he couldn’t be, Rhys would fly up to be with you during these. 

You didn’t have the heart to tell your brother that you preferred when Rhys was here instead of him, only because he always magicked his wings away so you didn’t have to see them. Cassian’s were just a reminder of what you had lost. 

Relearning to walk has been one of the hardest parts of losing your wings.

Even now it was a struggle to simply stand. You were too used to the weight of having wings on your back and using them to balance. You felt their absence in more ways than one.

But this one was easier to deal with—the physical part. It was the mental and emotional part that still kept you up at night. The loss of freedom, having to know you’d never be able to fly again. The nightmares. The embarrassment. The shame. 

You had never been a particularly proud Illyrian, never agreeing with the way your people were raised and the culture they lived in. But still, having those wings made you a part of something bigger than yourself—a community, a tribe, a family. 

You weren’t like Rhys, not a half-breed like him. You didn’t have the pointy ears to make you fit in with the wingless High Fae. You’d always be other to them. And now you’d be other to your people as well. 

You tried to blink away the tears forming in your eyes but it didn’t matter. Your brother seemed to sense the change in your mood and rose from his chair in the corner where he had been monitoring the session.

“You’re doing great, kiddo,” Cassian said, trying to encourage you to keep trying. “One step at a time.”

“I can’t,” you choked out, your muscles straining from the effort to keep you upright. “I-I can’t.”

“You can and you will,” Cassian said, sternly. “Come on, I know you can do it.” 

“I can’t.”

You wobbled, letting out a long exhale. You had only made it halfway to the other side of the mat. Pain pierced through your still healing back, serving as another reminder of what you had lost. Your fractured hip had healed already but the bones still felt like they were being grinded together every time you moved your legs. 

“Thank you for your help today, Madja,” Cassian said, sharing a look with the older healer. “I can take it from here.”

Madja, as if also sensing the shift in the atmosphere, took her leave without argument to give you some privacy with your brother. 

“Just make sure she eats something after this. Her body needs more nourishment,” Madja said on her way out. The noise of the door shutting behind her was all it took for the hold on your emotions to completely crumble. 

You felt your legs give out as a cry escape from your throat. Cassian darted forward, catching you only just before you hit the ground. He slowly lowered you the rest of the way, going with you to hold you in a tight embrace as sobs racked your body. 

“I-I can’t do this, Cass,” you cried over and over again. “I can’t do this.”

He knew you weren’t just talking about walking.

Every intake of breath reminded you of the heavy weight of your heart in your chest. It was unbearable, all consuming. The heartache, the pain, the feeling of the mating bond still lingering in the background of it all. You wanted to rip your heart out, wanted to scream and scream but all that came out were inaudible words and sobs. 

“It’s going to be okay, sweetheart,” Cassian murmured, petting your hair on the back of your head. “I promise you.” 

“My wings, Cass, m-my wings are gone,” you choked out, tears streaming down your face.

Cassian cradled your head in his neck, pulling you tighter against him. His own body was tense and you knew he was holding back his own emotions, trying to be strong for you. “I know, kiddo, I know.” 

“M-my wings,” you cried. “My wings. I-I want them back, Cass. P-please, I want them back!”

“I would cut off my own wings and give them to you if I could, sweetheart,” Cassian whispered, his voice filled with despair. “I’m so sorry.”

He couldn’t understand this feeling, would never unless he too lost his wings. You remembered when he almost had after protecting Azriel in Hybern from the blast of the Cauldron. Azriel…Just thinking of his name was making you spiral further, choking on your own sobs. 

There had once been a time when Azriel had been the one to save your wings. And now he was part of the reason why you lost them. You weren’t even sure which hurt more at this point. His betrayal or the loss of your wings. 

Both felt so violating. 

A piece of you, of your body, ripped away along with your trust and heart. Your mate sleeping with another female and coming home to you. Looking you in the eyes and keeping that secret from you each and every day. Making love to you knowing he was sharing himself with another behind your back. How were you supposed to move on? 

It didn’t help that you weren’t fully rid of Azriel. The bond was still an unwelcomed presence inside of you, still sang his name–called for him–despite the hurt he had caused you. You wanted to tear it to shreds. 

“Why?” You cried, wrapping your arms around Cassian’s neck to fall into him further. Your brother held you as tight as he could, stroking your hair, whispering words of support in your ear. “Why wasn’t I g-good enough, Cass? W-why wasn’t I enough for him? What is wrong with m-me?”

The guttural wails that came from you caused Cassian to squeeze his eyes shut, trying to keep his own tears at bay. Your chest heaved as you struggled to even breath under the crushing anguish that was consuming you. He held you as you shook, held you as your tears soaked through his shirt, held you as he restrained himself from shooting off to go find Azriel and kill him. 

“There is nothing wrong with you, sweetheart. Nothing,” Cassian growled. “Azriel is a fool for losing you. He’s the fuck-up. Not you.”

“He is my mate, Cass, my mate. And he–he did this to me. Why?”

“Because he’s a miserable bastard who doesn’t know how to love,” Cassian growled. 

You couldn’t even register his words over the pounding of your own wailing heart. “What did I do to deserve this?”

You felt so violated, so vulnerable, so completely and utterly shattered. The pain of your broken heart seemed to echo in the depths of your very soul. Why hadn’t you been enough for him?

Was Elain just that much better? Was she prettier, smarter, a better female? Could she give him something you couldn’t?

“You didn’t deserve this. You did nothing wrong,” Cassian murmured into your hair, kissing the top of your head. “You are so much better than them, sweetheart.” 

“B-but then why wasn’t I enough?” Your cries met their crescendo, your hands shaking as you clung onto Cassian’s shirt with tight fists. “Why wasn’t I enough, Cass? Why?” 

Your voice was hoarse, your words cracking as you spoke. But there was nothing left to say. 

Nothing left to say at all. 

You weren’t good enough for Azriel, for your own mate. You weren’t good enough to keep his attention. Not good enough to keep his love. 

You were just simply not enough. 

Cassian held you there as you cried and cried, held you as the weight of everything you lost engulfed you. Held you through the raw grief that surged like a tempest within you. Held you until you had cried yourself into a fitful sleep, only then rising to carry you back to your room. 

────────────

As soon as Mor had gotten word about what had happened, she immediately started her journey home from the continent. She had gone to you the minute she landed in Velaris, but Cassian had turned her away because he didn’t want to interrupt your sleep, something you hadn’t gotten much of since the attack.

But that was okay because she had a few things she needed to take care of. 

“Where is she!”

Mor’s shout rang through the entire house, the ground quaking underneath her as she stormed into the dining room where a very morose dinner seemed to be taking place with Rhys, Feyre, Elain and Amren at the table. Rhys shot up from his seat. “Y/n is at the House of Wind with—”

“Not her,” Mor snarled before pointing a finger at Elain, who stared at her wide-eyed. “You.” 

Before anyone could stop her, Mor launched herself forward, grabbing Elain by the hair on the back of her head and slamming her face down on the wooden table she was sitting at. Rhys cursed while Feyre jumped up from her seat, thanking the Gods that Nesta wasn’t here for this. 

Rhys grabbed Feyre by the arm, shaking his head at her. “Some things need to be fought the fae way. Let her learn.” 

Amren leaned back in her chair, not so much as flinching at the display. 

Mor kept her fist wrapped in Elain’s hair, pressing her face against the hardwood as the other girl cried out, blood dripping down her nose.

“That was for Y/n because she’s up there learning how to fucking walk again because of you,” Mor hissed before yanking Elain up by her hair until she was standing. 

Elain cried out for Feyre but her sister just pressed her lips into a thin line, Rhys’s hand still around her arm. Feyre was disappointed in her sister for what she had done but she still bristled as Rhys’s amusement at the scene traveled down their bond.

Mor decked Elain in the face, the sound audible, causing Feyre to flinch. Elain’s head whipped to the side as she dropped to the floor with a loud sob. “And that was for Cassian because he would never lay his hands on a weak, pathetic female but I will. Remember that.” 

Elain’s cries rung out in the room, blood dripping from her now broken nose and a bruise already forming on her cheek. Mor ignored her as she looked to Rhysand.

“Where is the other one?” Her voice was full of anger. “I’m going to fucking kill him.” 

“I don’t know,” Rhys sighed, finally letting go of Feyre. She rushed to Elain’s side, helping her off the floor and out of the room, giving Mor a remorseful look, feeling guilty over what her sister had caused. 

“What do you mean you don’t know?”

“He disappeared once Y/n woke up and made it very clear she didn’t wish to see him. I have no idea where he went.”

“That fucking coward,” Mor grumbled. “Why is Elain still here? This is Y/n’s home, not hers. She shouldn’t have to be the one who leaves and you know she will if those two are still around. Cassian would leave with her too—I’m sure of it.”

“I know he would,” Rhys said, sitting back down and putting his head in his hands. “I don’t know what to do, Mor. If Elain wasn’t Feyre’s sister I would’ve had her banished in a second and Azriel…Gods, he’s my brother. I can’t believe he would do something like this. He loves Y/n. I don’t know why he would hurt her like this.” 

“Azriel has always been his worst enemy,” Mor sighed, sitting next to Rhys. “We’ve all tried to help him as much as we could but this just isn’t something we can help him with. Y/n is going to need our support. This could destroy her.” 

“It already has,” Rhys replied. “She might leave our court regardless of whether or not we send Azriel and Elain away. I wouldn’t blame her. I’ve already let her know that if she wants out, I’ll have everything set-up for her.” 

“What of the girl’s mate? The redhead,” Amren piped up, crossing her arms. “Does he know yet? You know how males are. He might call for a blood duel against Azriel.” 

“Lucien has already been informed about what happened,” Rhys spoke. “Cassian has been on a warpath and was all too eager to tell Lucien. I think part of him hoped he would duel Azriel. But Lucien wouldn’t.” 

“So what happens now?” Mor asked. 

Rhys looked at her and she took note of the heavy bags under his eyes. He hadn’t been sleeping. Neither had she. She was certain none of them had. Azriel had caused a giant rift in this family—one felt by them all. 

Rhys held back his tears, clearing his throat.

“I know what was to be done,” he breathed out. “But it’s going to be hard. He was…He was my brother for over five hundred years. Regardless of what he’s done, it’s going to be hard to say goodbye.” 

Mor rested a comforting hand on his shoulder. “I know, Rhys. Nothing about this is going to be easy.”

“He cannot be trusted anymore,” Amren added. “Anyone who could cheat on their mate cannot be trusted. He might as well have spit on the Mother’s face for what he did.”

“I just want to know why. Why would he do this?” 

Mor let out a long breath. “I’m not sure you’ll ever get an answer. I think Azriel, himself, can’t even answer that question.” 

“I failed her, Mor. I knew how dangerous that mission was. I should’ve never given it to her,” the quiet cry shook Rhys’s body. 

“Azriel was supposed to be with her, Rhys,” Mor said. “It’s not your fault. He failed her. This was his doing.” 

But Rhys just shook his head, the tears finally slipping free from both of their eyes. 

“Get it out now, Mor, before you see her,” Rhys choked out. “It’s…hard to see her in the state she’s in. Prepare yourself. We have to be strong for her.” 

“I know,” Mor whispered, wiping at her tears. “I know.” 

────────────

“Hey, kiddo,” Cassian’s voice pulled you from your sleep.

You blinked awake, groaning at the pounding in your head. It took you a second to realize you were in your room. Cassian must’ve carried you here after your breakdown yesterday. 

Cassian was sitting beside you, stroking your hair. “I brought you some breakfast and someone is here to see you.”

It was only then you noticed the other person sitting at the end of your bed. 

“Mor?” Your voice was hoarse, the word barely escaping. “You’re here?”

“I came back as soon as I heard,” Mor said, leaning forward to clutch your hand in hers. “How are you doing, babygirl?” 

Mor had always felt like an older sister to you. Her friendship with your brother had made the two of you close. 

“I’m…I’m not doing good,” you replied, honestly. “I can’t…I don’t know what to do, Mor. I don’t know how to move on from here. Part of me wishes I died in that alleyway. I wish I died the minute my wings were cut off.” 

“I know,” she said, sadly. “I wish I had an answer for you but I don’t. It’s going to be hard, but we’re going to be with you every step of the way.” 

“Come on, why don’t you sit up so you can eat,” Cassian murmured, putting a hand on your back to help you up. 

“I’m not hungry,” you protested.

“You have to eat something, sweetheart,” Cass said gently. “Madja’s orders.”

But you shook your head. You didn’t have an appetite. Everything still hurt so much. 

“Just give her a second, Cass,” Mor murmured. 

Cassian frowned but nodded. He brushed some of your hair away from your face again and the soothing motion started another round of tears. 

“Hey, hey,” Cassian whispered. “It’s okay.”

“It’s not okay, Cass! How will I ever be able to show my face again?” you cried. “I will be shamed, spit on, shunned because I lost my wings—because I couldn’t fight for them. I can never return to Illyria. I won’t be able to help train with the girls anymore.” 

“Emerie told me the girls are already awaiting your return. They miss you,” Mor reassured. “Who cares about what the stupid males are going to think? Most of those females have had their freedom of flight taken from them. They would never shun you for what happened.” 

Your eyes fell on the many bouquets of flowers and get well cards on your nightstand. Cassian had been bringing them to you. Your heart ached at the sight. 

“But I failed them, Mor,” you sobbed. “I failed them. I’m supposed to be strong. I’m supposed to be a warrior and all it took was one male to completely destroy me. I’m worthless to them now. How can I teach them to fight for themselves if I cannot even do that?” 

“You are not worthless,” Cassian said, sternly. “You are more of a fighter than half of those Illyrian males. You continue to fight each day knowing you have to live with the loss of your wings. Most of the males would’ve given up already, sweetheart. You are stronger than you think.” 

“I-I’m not. I’m weak and a failure,” you cried. “I couldn’t protect my wings. Couldn’t keep my mate’s love. Couldn’t…couldn’t–”

Your sobs overtook your words, your entire body shaking. 

“Listen to me, Y/n.” Mor demanded. “You are not weak. You are not a failure. You are a million times better than the two assholes who hurt you. You will survive this. You will survive him. I promise you, Y/n, I promise you.” 

She embraced you, holding you as you broke down into gut-wrenching sobs once again. 

────────────

The air was tense to say the least. Rhys was standing behind his desk, palms pressed flat against the surface as he stared at the two people sitting in front of him. Feyre stood next to him as both a pillar of support and the High Lady. 

Azriel’s eyes were downcast. He hadn’t even looked at Elain since he had been dragged into this office by Mor—a new black eye and a bruised jaw decorating his face. Elain stared and stared at him, her eyes pleading with him to look at her but he ignored her presence. 

Azriel looked rough. He hadn’t shaved, his eyes were bloodshot, but the most surprising thing was his lack of shadows swarming him. 

“Where are you shadows?” Rhys asked. “I swear, Azriel, if you sent them after Y/n, I will bring Cassian down here to do with you as he pleases.” 

Azriel looked up, shaking his head. “They won’t sing to me anymore. Not since…Not since the accident.” 

It was true. His shadows had hissed at him, recoiled in his presence before they dissipated as if they too had felt his betrayal. They had wailed in agony at the loss of Y/n. They had always skittered away in Elain’s presence, probably the only reason they never yelled at him when he was with her…but it seems this time, they had left for good. 

Despite his curiosity, Rhys decided to drop the subject. This was not the time or place for that discussion. 

“Feyre and I have come to a decision about what must happen due to the results of your actions,” Rhys said, his voice full of authority and resignation. 

“What? But we’ve done nothing wrong!” Elain exclaimed. “I know we shouldn’t have gone behind Y/n’s back but we’re in love!”

“I don’t care,” Rhys snarled, baring his teeth. “I don’t care how much you two claim to be in love! Azriel has caused irreparable damage to his own mate—a member of my court, of my family. And you were complicit in that.” 

“Are we not your family too? Feyre is my sister!”

“And Y/n is mine,” Rhys retorted. “And Cassian’s.”

Elain crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair. “So we’re being punished for falling in love? It’s not our fault the Cauldron decided to make someone else our mates. It was never our choice.” 

“You’re not being punished for falling in love, if that’s even what we can call this,” Feyre spat out, staring at her sister with disappointment. “You’re being punished for how you handled a sensitive situation. You’re being punished for lying to our whole family and for causing it to be torn apart.”

“You’re not being punished at all,” Rhys snapped. “If you were, both of you would be in a cell in Hewn City and I’d let Cassian decide what your punishment would be considering Y/n would never have the heart to hurt either of you. This is simply the consequence of your own stupid actions.” 

Azriel’s head shot up at the mention of your name. “How is Y/n? Is she doing okay?” 

Feyre went to answer but Rhys shook his head at her. 

“You don’t get the privilege of knowing anything about her at this point, Azriel,” he huffed. 

Azriel stood from his chair in anger. “She is my mate, Rhys.”

“Sit down,” Rhys commanded, his voice rising for the first time since the meeting started. “Funny how now you acknowledge her as a mate but not when you had your tongue down Elain’s throat.” 

“Fuck you, Rhys,” Azriel growled, but sat, unable to fight the power of a High Lord’s order. 

“No fuck you, Azriel! I thought you were my brother! How could you do this to Y/n? To our family? Both of you should be ashamed. You are already getting off easy, don’t make me rethink my choice. Lucien has every right to storm in right now and demand a blood duel against you. And even though it’s not a practice in my court, I’d even let Y/n declare one against Elain.”

Elain’s face paled but Azriel only scoffed in indignation. “As if Feyre would ever let anyone kill one of her sisters.” 

Feyre stepped forward, glaring at the shadowsinger and Elain. “I’m done protecting her. Nesta is done protecting her. We have spent our whole lives taking care of her thinking she was just too soft for this world—too naive and innocent. But I think we’re finally seeing the real you, Elain. And it is time for you to face the consequences of your own actions, make your own way in life.” 

“So what are you going to do? Are you going to force me to live in the House of Wind like you did Nesta?”

“No,” Feyre said, stone faced before looking at Rhys. They had decided together how they would handle this situation.

“You are both hereby banished from the Night Court,” Rhys declared. “I will not tolerate Y/n having to lose her own home after she just lost her wings and we are going to do what's best for her. Lucien has made it clear that you both will not be welcomed in Day either and Helion is standing by his son’s decision. Beyond that, we cannot help you. You will pack your things and leave immediately. If you step one foot in this court after you leave, I will be notified and you will face worse repercussions.” 

“What?” Elain exclaimed. “Feyre, you can’t be serious! Look, I’ll move out of the Riverhouse. We can live in Azriel’s apartment and avoid Y/n.”

“That apartment belongs to Y/n too, you know,” Feyre snapped. “We have already made our decision. We will not be negotiating any terms.” 

“Rhys, come on,” Azriel said. “I will leave but you don’t need to banish Elain too. She did nothing wrong.”

“Elain knew you were a mated male, knew you were together with Y/n. While I agree that what you have done is worse, she still knew what she was doing wasn’t right.” 

“Where are we supposed to go?” Elain cried. “I don’t have any money. I don’t have anywhere to go, Feyre. You can’t just toss me out like this.” 

“Azriel has money,” Feyre shrugged. “I guess you’re his problem now.” 

“You know none of the other High Lord’s will want me in their courts, Rhys,” Azriel snarled. “Not after the things I’ve done for you.” 

“Should of thought of that before you betrayed our whole family.” 

“I hear the old Manor is still abandoned in the human lands,” Feyre remarked. “Since Vassa had reclaimed her territory with Jurian at her side and Lucien had moved to Day to be with his father.” 

“We can’t survive there,” Elain sobbed. “Humans hate faeries.” 

“Not my problem, Elain,” Feyre said. “You’re not my problem anymore.” 

“Azriel, do something!” Elain cried, looking at the shadowsinger. 

“What do you expect him to do?” Rhys laughed humorlessly. “He no longer has his title, his place in my court. He has no sway here. You both don’t. You will not change our minds.” 

“Nesta won’t allow this!”

“Nesta,” Feyre said, “is packing up your things as we speak.” 

Elain fell back in her chair, crying. 

“I’d say I wish you two the best, but I don’t,” Rhys said. “You have two hours to sort out whatever you have to before I expect you both to be out of my court. Two hours. Do you understand?” 

“Please,” Elain begged. “Please don’t do this, Feyre.”

But Feyre only shook her head at her sister. “There’s no going back for either of you. Say your goodbyes, sort out your affairs, but you will leave in two hours.” 

Rhys took his leave after that, giving Azriel one last look that was full of disgust, guilt, regret, sadness. One last look at his brother before striding out of that room, never to see or speak to him again. 

────────────

Mor had just left when you heard the flapping of wings approaching your balcony. Thinking it was your brother, you pushed yourself to stand and hobbled over to the balcony doors using the walls of your room for support. You opened the door, expecting to see your brother, but your heart stopped when you came face to face with Azriel. 

Your eyes narrowed and you went to slam the door, but he grabbed it before you could. 

“Please, please just hear me out,” he pleaded. “I will leave, I promise, I just…I just—please.” 

“There is nothing you can say that will make me forgive you, Azriel.”

“I know, baby–”

“Don’t you dare call me that!”

Azriel looked down at his feet. “Okay, I’m sorry. I’m not here to try to earn your forgiveness, Y/n. I know I fucked up beyond repair. I know I failed you, failed us. Words will never be able to convey how much I regret everything.” 

You crossed your arms, leaning against the doorframe as your legs threatened to give out. You were debating screaming out for Cassian. 

Azriel reached into his pocket and pulled out a small stone that looked to be enchanted. He held it out towards you. 

“I can’t…I can’t hear the shadows anymore,” he murmured. “But I can’t just leave you without some way to contact me. In case you ever change your mind, in case there is ever a chance that we can be together again. You’ll be able to call for me with this.”

“That is never going to happen.”

“Please, just take it,” Azriel begged. “Even if you don’t want me, please. If you’re ever in danger again and need help, you can use it for that too. Just please, take it.” 

When you said nothing, didn’t so much as open your palm so he could place the stone in it, he knelt down and placed it at your feet instead. You stared at him, emotionless. You didn’t want to give him anything. He didn’t deserve your tears or your sadness. 

“I’m so sorry, Y/n. I’m so sorry for the way things ended,” Azriel said. “You deserve a better mate than me. If I never…If I never get to see you again after this, I promise I will find you in the next life and the one after that. I will do right by you. I will give us another chance.”

He stared at you, pleading with you to say anything. Anything. Even if you screamed at him, beat him, cried—anything was better than this utter silence. But you didn’t. You merely looked at him like he was nothing to you. Like he was a stranger. 

“Goodbye, Azriel,” you said. “I hope you find happiness in your life. Truly.”

And then you slammed the door shut and walked away. 

And he knew then that your words would haunt him for the rest of his life because he knew he had lost the one real thing that had brought him true happiness forever.

────────────

One Year Later ~ Winter Solstice 

“Get up, you lazy cow!”

The sheets were yanked off your sleeping body, exposing you to the cold morning air. You let out a shriek, cursing at your brother and trying to grab the sheets back.

“What the hell, Cassian!”

“It’s Winter Solstice!”

“It’s also six in the morning,” you retorted, falling back down on your bed. 

“Nope, you’re not going back to sleep,” Cassian said. “It’s time to get up!” 

Before you could even respond, Cassian grabbed you by the ankle and yanked you to the end of the bed. You squealed as he tossed you over his shoulder like a bag of potatoes, pounding on his back as he raced out of the room.

“Cassian! Let me down, you big brute!” 

But he only laughed at you, carrying you all the way to the kitchen where Nesta was sitting at the counter with a steaming cup of tea. She didn’t so much as blink as he dropped you into the chair next to her, already used to her mate’s antics. 

“Goodmorning, Y/n,” Nesta said, pushing an already prepared cup of tea your way.

“Oh, you are an absolute goddess,” you groaned, greedily accepting the mug. You curled your ice cold fingers around it, relishing in the warmth. 

“Hey! What about me?” Cassian yelled, swinging a wash cloth over his shoulder as he started to make breakfast for the two of you. “I’m the one making you guys food!”

“You’re also the one who woke us up, dingbat,” you scoffed, causing Nesta to snort.

It wasn’t long before Cassian was sliding a plate of pancakes your way. “Eat up. You have a long day ahead of you.”

You raised an eyebrow at him but accepted the food, scarfing it down. It was almost hilarious how out of the three of you it was Cassian who cooked the best. 

After breakfast, you retired to your room to get ready to go down to the River House for the real celebrations. Cassian had cryptically told you to wear pants, so you did. You had no idea why until hours later, when you were all lounging in the sitting room after lunch. 

A knock on the front door had you jumping up from your seat. “I’ll get it!” 

No one batted an eye as you raced for the door, pulling it open to see Lucien standing on the doorstep. You let out a noise of excitement, grabbing him in a hug.

“Lucien!” you exclaimed. “You’re here early!” 

A few weeks after the incident, Lucien had sent you a letter asking how you were faring and offering you support. He became a lifeline while you had dealt with the aftermath of saying goodbye to your mate and healing. You both leaned on each other during that time because you were simply the only two who understood the pain of having a mate who fell in love with another. 

“Happy Winter Solstice,” he said as you pulled away and opened the door wider so he could enter. “I’m actually here to retrieve you.”

Your brows furrowed in confusion. “What?”

“Is everything ready?” 

Your brother’s voice came from behind you and you whipped your head around to stare at him. He was wearing his flying leathers now only confusing you further. 

“Yes,” Lucien nodded. 

“What’s going on?” you asked, suspiciously. 

No one else followed Cassian out. Not even Nesta. You frowned as he shook Lucien’s hand, giving him a friendly whack on the back. 

“You’ll see,” your brother said with a grin. “Lucien is going to winnow us somewhere, kiddo, to your solstice gift.”

You looked between them with narrowed eyes but accepted Lucien’s outstretched hand. His grin was the last thing you saw before you were pulled away in a flurry of wind. A second later, you appeared in the middle of a clearing. 

The tall green grass, the slightly warm breeze, the lack of snow, told you that you were in the Spring Court. You whirled to face your brother who let out a sneeze as soon as he got his bearings. 

“What are we doing here?” 

“So, you know how when Feyre was brought back she was given a drop of power from every High Lord?” Cassian asked. 

You nodded, not understanding where this was going. Your hand slipped into your pocket, around a stone that was always kept there. The one Azriel had left you. You had never used it but for some reason, had never parted with it either. At some point, you had started holding it whenever you felt nervous or fell back into the heartache you had experienced last year. 

“Well, of course she inherited part of Tamlin’s shapeshifting powers. And we thought maybe she could shapeshift others the way he does, but after numerous tries, unfortunately it seems as though the sliver of power she received only allows her to transform herself.” 

“It was not fun being the guinea pig for those test runs,” Lucien laughed. “When Feyre was unable to do it, we had to turn to someone else.” 

“Okay, but what does that have to do with me? Or my solstice gift?” 

Before either of them could respond, a noise came from the shrubbery in the distance. Tamlin’s beast form pounced out from it, striding towards you. You gasped and backed away, right into your brother’s chest. He placed a hand on your shoulder.

“It’s okay,” he murmured. “He’s here as a favor to Lucien.”

“And Feyre and Rhys approved this?” you whispered up to him. 

He nodded his assurance.

You let out another gasp as Tamlin shifted back into his fae form. He looked well, better than the last time you had seen him at least. He seemed to have regained some weight and gotten a haircut. You knew he was still in the process of recovering his court. You wondered what sort of strings Lucien had to pull to get him to willingly let you and Cassian come here considering his history with your rulers.

He gave you and Cassian a polite, but bland, greeting which you reciprocated.

“Are any of you going to tell me what’s going on?” 

“Tam is going to help you shapeshift,” Lucien explained. “If you will allow him.”

“Shapeshift? But why would I–”

It clicked in your head, what they were implying, why they had brought you to this large clearing. You whipped around to look up at your brother who seemed to be holding back tears. He gave you a nod, already knowing what you were asking.

“W-wings,” you choked out. “He can give me wings.” 

“It won’t last forever,” Lucien said. “But yes, he can give you wings.”

Tears started slipping down your cheeks and you lurched towards Lucien, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him into a hug. You…you were going to have wings. You were going to be able to fly!

You didn’t care that it wouldn’t last forever. Just the chance to fly once more was a gift in itself.

“Thank you,” you whispered into his ear. “Thank you.” 

Lucien laughed, hugging you back before you slowly pulled away from him. You looked over your shoulder at your brother. “This was your idea?”

Cassian shook his head. “As much as I wish I could claim this, it was actually Lucien who thought of this first. I’m just here to supervise–and to offer you a flying partner if you’ll have me.” 

You smiled up at Lucien, unbelievably touched at the thoughtfulness. Lucien wiped your tears from your face, gently, before placing his hands on your shoulders. “Are you ready?”

You nodded with enthusiasm.

Lucien gestured at Tamlin to come closer.

“Thank you for doing this,” you said to him with a small bow of the head. 

“I once watched a faerie die after losing his wings,” Tamlin murmured. “Its…Its a horrific crime. One my family has a history with. I’d like this to be my first step towards making amends for their mistakes.” 

You weren’t sure what to say, so you just gave him a grateful nod of the head. He focused intently on you and you felt his magic surround you. It felt nice, like a crisp Spring breeze. And then you felt a familiar weight on your back. You stumbled for a second, readjusting to how it used to feel having wings. But it surprisingly came back to you quite easily.  

You looked at them over your shoulder, stretching them out and flapping them a few times. They looked just like your brother’s and you realized Tamlin must’ve used him as a guide. You grinned, facing Cassian. 

“Race you towards the end of the clearing,” you shouted before taking off into the sky. 

Your brother’s laughter followed after you as he too launched into the sky. 

+++

Hours after night had fallen, you found yourself behind the River House, leaning on the railing to watch the slow moving river. Your wings had since dissipated, but you hadn’t felt this light in a long time. Being able to fly today had healed you in some way.

You had spent a lot of time thinking while you flew amongst the clouds. Thinking of who you used to be. Sometimes you missed that girl, sometimes you wished more than anything to be her again. 

But you hadn’t felt that today…

Today, you had felt like a new person. Like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon. And perhaps in a way, you were. 

Life had never been predictable. Your whole life had been filled with tragedy and sorrow, challenges and hard work, happiness and joy, regret and insecurities. You had gone through so much, so much, but somehow, you were always able to come out on the other side.

It wasn’t easy. It involved many days of despair, awful thoughts, and soulless recovery. You had to fight to get up sometimes, had to fight just to feel something. Sometimes it seemed like you’d conquer one mountain only to be faced with another. 

If it wasn’t for your brother, you were certain you would’ve fallen back a dozen times. But he had been your pillar of strength, your rock to rest against when things got too hard. And Mor and Rhys had been there to help lift you back up. 

You had gained new friends, found a new life for yourself. Metamorphosed into a new person. 

That girl from a year ago? 

Well, you were finally going to let her die. 

You reached into your pocket and pulled out the stone Azriel had left you. You ran your thumb over its smooth surface. It didn’t hurt as much to look at it now, not like it had before. Before it had represented so many things.

The loss of love, the grief of losing your wings, the reminder that he had betrayed you. 

But now…now it just looked like a rock. 

You gripped it in your fist and tossed it into the Sidra, watching as it hit the water’s surface with a small thud before sinking down into the black water. Down and down, until it would find its way to the bottom. Perhaps then it would drift out into the sea. 

You heard the backdoor to the house open.

“Hey, Y/n, come on!” Mor shouted out to you. “We’re going to Ritas!” 

You took one last look at where the rock had disappeared in the water, letting out a long breath. 

“Goodbye,” you whispered into the cold air. “I’ll see you in our next lifetime. Maybe then you’ll deserve me.” 

With a new weight lifted off your shoulders, you turned and marched back to your new beginning. 

[hxnbi]

⸻ °♡⃘ . WIND BREAKER BOYS AS ROMANCE TROPES

pairings. umemiya hajime, choji tomiyama, sakura haruka, endo yamato, kiryu mitsuki x gn. reader (separate)

part two

UMEMIYA HAJIME + childhood friends to lovers

in my eyes, umemiya is one who would undoubtedly prefer someone who knows him better than himself and connects with him than anyone else—that person being the one he grew up with, someone who can bear his craziness and his occasionally unhinged behaviour. scratch that, his consistently unhinged behaviour.

with all the hardships he had been through in his life, from scraped and bloody knees from playing in the park to shared secrets between you two, you were always there for him, and so would he. umemiya has been your constant since childhood, and the same goes with him. the transition from friends to perhaps something more was seamless. almost as if it had always been meant—waiting, patiently, to happen. friendship formed the foundation of your relationship, and it would be what remains. as you both grew, so did your feelings, maturing into a love that was as enduring as umemiya himself. only when he faced the idea—the terrifying possibility of losing you, did he realize.

“that’s it…”

hiragi’s face scrunched up, peering over at umemiya, whose face was compressed onto the desk he was laying on. “the hell are you talking about?”

with a burst of energy, umemiya suddenly lifted his face from the desk like a startled meerkat, “THATS IT! THAT’S WHAT IT IS! I LOVE THEM!!” leaving hiragi practically hyperventilating, sighing heavily before popping more than a few pills into his mouth for good measure (not medical advice).

“still don’t understand who you’re referring to…”

that’s just it… you weren’t “just a sibling” to him. he never thought that way. he never ever saw you in only that way.

he began dreaming up a future with you. after all, you knew him best, had been through his best and worst moments, and even then, stuck by him. his desire to be protective over you was a comforting presence, even if it was sometimes perhaps a bit overbearing, but that was umemiya’s personality. through the years, his commitment to you never changed, never wavered, for his mind was already made up.

he didn’t know that the one he needed by his side was there all along. you’ve always been by each other’s side, and now, as you both grow older and as the years tick by, umemiya can't, he just couldn't imagine a day without you. you mean too much for him to just let you go. friendship turned into love, and before you knew it, you both would be together, dancing at your wedding.

...or so was umemiya’s dream when he woke up that morning, just wishing for that to be a reality.

CHOJI TOMIYAMA + love at first sight

a simple, straightforward case of who has caught your eye sort of trope, but choji knew that this was different. choji was never one to hide his emotions—wearing his feelings very much on his sleeve, and when he saw you for the first time, his heart made its intentions clear. the world stops around him the first time he sees you, and he very obviously stares and gawks at you with no shame. it was love at first sight.

togame’s eyes widen like a deer in headlights. “w-what? are you sure?” 

“yeah!! it was like nothing i’ve ever felt before,” choji sighs exasperatingly, leaning on his chair with a clear conscience, “they were so dreamy… i wish i could see them again.”

and see you again, he would. Not by accident, as what you initially thought, but choji and choji alone would pull the strings to make every meeting seemingly happen, all the while acting as naturally as possible.

choji’s larger-than-life personality meant he pursued you with an earnest intensity. his eyes would light up every time you entered the room, glowing with delight every time everytime you paid him even an ounce of affection, and despite that, choji still wanted more. he wanted so much more. his affection was genuine and pure, devoid of any pretence. even togame couldn’t question the authenticity of choji’s supposed affection for you. the boy was utterly smitten.

choji finds any and every way he can to approach you. and his efforts aren’t for naught, as even you could see the sparkles in the boy’s eyes, down to the way he would stare down at him without saying a word. perhaps creepy in any other instance, but it never felt that way to you.

a nervous yet friendly smile would frequently accompany choji’s awkward attempts to get close to you. there was something just so endearing in choji’s gaze—a kind of innocence and even childlike admiration that made your heart soften. he wasn’t just staring; he was taking in every detail of your face and expression as if trying to memorize your presence. his eyes, wide with wonder, held no malice nor ulterior motives, just a simple, unspoken, pure and honest adoration, all underlining his true sincerity.

HARUKA SAKURA + forced proximity

from when he was young, sakura has always distanced himself from people. he had never been one for social interactions, preferring the solitude of his own thoughts rather than the scrutiny of a crowd watching him, judging him. to him, his existence in their lives was a curse. only he deserved it, and only he would bear it. but when circumstances forced you into close quarters, his aloof and icy exterior began to thaw. the closeness of your body next to him, the warmness of your breath, made sakura uneasy, and yet, he didn't pull away. 

initially, like with everyone else sakura ever connected with, he followed his usual pattern of what he knew to do best—pushing you away. not just metaphorically but physically, shoving you to the ground when all you did was to try and lightly tap his shoulder. he had hurt you. this was what always happened without fail. but even still, you never went away, like a rather pesky mosquito.

during the unfortunate times when you were forced to share a small space with him, seeing first-hand the rare moments of openness he usually kept hidden, even from those who supposedly knew him best—because no one actually did. the forced short proximity in the cramped quarters revealed an authentic side, all in the subtle ways he watched over you that your eyes slowly caught on to.

“stay away from me. it’s better for both of us.”

time and time again, you would wonder and question why he continuously tried to gently push you away, but never to the point of truly physically shoving you away and hurting you. even so, sakura, still cared about you. that, he would never deceive.

“no, it’s not, sakura. i told you, i’m not going anywhere.” 

while it did hurt for him to say that about you when all you did was to be his heart, it hurt you, even more, to know that this was truly how he thought of himself to be—a “person” who didn’t deserve love and affection.

“...i don’t need anyone. especially not you.”

“...maybe. but maybe you need someone who won’t leave, no matter how hard you push.”

“YOU’RE JUST GOING TO BE HURT WITH ME—”

you smiled. “then let me be the one to decide that for myself. right?"

no matter how many times he would push you away, despite his constant attempts to distance himself, you were never going to leave that easily, and perhaps sakura knew that his face flushing red. a small crack had formed in sakura’s defences. you never thought that “being stuck” with sakura was a curse, but a chance to see the true person behind the mask.

ENDO YAMADO + opposites attract

endo was your complete opposite in every conceivable way. his piercing, intense gaze was a contrast to your own vibrant, pastel, and borderline revolting energy, balancing each other’s strengths and differences, light and shadow. rather than a mix of oil and water, it created a dynamic that neither of you could have predicted.

endo is more on the serious side. no, very much on the serious side, so your fun and excitement help him loosen up. to many, your contrasting qualities complemented each other, filling the gaps that the other lacked. some would say that your kindness filled the empathy that endo very much lacked, but regardless, endo’s initial skepticism turned into a fascination, and he found himself drawn to the very traits that set you apart from him. he finds it adorable when you do things he would never even dream of, like dancing in the rain, but he never particularly commented on them to keep his composure.

he admires your personality in a rather subtle, aloof way, although he would never say those words out loud. his pride is too great for that. you’re each other’s comfort and sanctuary, finding things in each other you both never had. so strong, in fact, that your honey-coated words and presence can hardly push you away from him, and over time, endo lets you.

your contrasting qualities complemented each other, filling the gaps that the other lacked. anyone who even dares to threaten the solace of your company at your side, endo treats as a literal threat to himself.

after all, you were quite literally his other half.

“yama… why do you always act like you need to protect me?”

“i don’t know what you’re talking about.”

you would give him a look that said, “you can’t fool me,” and he would only tsk and whisk his head in the other direction. 

you’re important to him, more than he can ever put into words. every glance, every small gesture, and every moment. endo doesn’t bother himself with the extravagance of affectionate words and grand declarations, but his actions go far beyond that. the second he notices something out of the ordinary—specifically, that you weren’t at his side at that exact moment of the day like always—he starts beating people up in a fit of rage. he goes berserk and sees red, and only when you arrive (after being frantically called in through your cellphone) does he finally calm down, asking you furiously where you were, with your shoulders being held in the grip of steel.

“fuck… you’re such a troublesome person.”

he needs to protect you, endo thinks. you’re the total opposite of him. you were kind, docile, and gentle, you were like his other half. the opposite of him that he cherished. whoever hurt you meant that they had to deal with him too. no one hurts his lover and gets away with it. everyone in the area knew this fact.

perhaps, opposites do indeed attract.

KIRYU MITSUKI + the boy next door 

kiryu was the quintessential boy next door. he was a sweet neighbour and a total gentleman that everyone admired. looking back at you and his first visit, it could have been more timely. as soon as the doorbell rang, your eyes would groggily open as you went to get the door to see who on earth was the person who disturbed your sweet nap. and as you opened the door, you saw a cute guy standing with a basket of miscellaneous goods in his hands. you almost thought you were still dreaming until you rubbed your tired eyes. “

“i’m mitsuki kiryu, your new neighbour. i just moved into the house beside yours. i met your parents yesterday but you weren’t here, so i figured i should introduce myself personally since we’re the same age and all.”

startled, you were very visibly taken aback, “o-oh, thank you. but, uh, shouldn’t i be the one giving you something?” you said sheepishly.

“oh, well, then you can always just give me something later!” he replied with the brightest smile imaginable, making you sweatdrop.

‘that’s not… what i meant.’

granted, your first impression of him was pretty unexpected, but he quickly proved to be a friendly person who truly had a heart of gold. you found yourself slowly falling for him after spending some time with him as a friend—his easy smile and warm eyes offering a sense of home.

but to find out that your life wasn’t the only one that changed, and that kiryu felt the same. as you grew older, so too did your friendship with the boy you first considered to be a mere neighbour. you were hardly even surprised when you heard that kiryu was a part of bofurin—a gang even you had come to admire. in a way, you weren’t surprised; it suited him and his upstanding moral compass. it didn’t, and never did, drive you away.

he was the boy next door, but also so much more—your confidant, your partner in crime, and your love.

©hxnbi. comments, reblogs, and likes are always appreciated ♡

[creamflix]

EPISODE #2 — CATG1RLS ARE RUINING MY LIFE! — featuring choso kamo (1.9k words) & suguru geto (1.7k words) content warnings reader wears cat ears, dub-con, yandere themes (over-obsessive (!!), overprotective (!!), mentions of murder (!!)), unprotected sex + creampies, manhandling, mean dom! suguru, dom! choso, collaring, pet-play, recording during sex, whiney + pussy drunk choso, degradation + humiliation, mindbreak + dumbification, cock drunk reader

— kinktober masterlist ♰ general masterlist

CHOSO’s hands tremble as he watches you. 

you’re just standing there, adjusting your cute little cat ears in the mirror like it’s nothing, but to him? god, it’s everything. his heart feels like it’s about to burst out of his chest, his dick already straining against his pants from the sight of you. you’re too cute, too perfect — so much so that it’s almost painful, and he’s seconds away from losing it completely.

“choso?” you call out softly, glancing at him over your shoulder, your innocent tone only making it worse. “are you okay, baby? you look —”

but before you can finish your sentence, he’s on you, crowding you against the dresser with his larger frame, his breath hot and heavy against the back of your neck as his hands grip your waist tightly. he can’t form the words to explain what’s happening to him, can’t tell you how your cuteness has him on the verge of tears, how every little thing you do makes his chest feel like it’s going to explode.

“s-sorry… i can’t —” he gasps, his voice already shaky as he presses himself against you, desperate for any sort of relief. “i can’t take it, baby, i—fuck, you’re too cute. y-you don’t even know what you do to me…”

his hips grind into you as he speaks, and you can feel just how hard he is, his cock throbbing against your ass even through his clothes. the desperation in his voice is palpable, and you can tell he’s barely holding it together. when you turn to look at him, his eyes are glossy, his lips parted as he pants heavily.

“choso,” you whisper, reaching up to cup his cheek, but that only seems to break the last bit of control he has left. his breath hitches, and before you know it, he’s dragging you to the bed, practically throwing you onto the mattress as he fumbles with his belt, hands shaking so much he can barely get his pants off.

“p-please… please let me,” he’s babbling now, voice full of need as he kneels between your legs, already tugging your panties down. “i need you, i need to feel you—so bad, baby. it hurts…”

he’s barely holding it together, and the second he frees his cock, he’s pressing the tip against your slick entrance, groaning softly at the wetness already coating you. but he doesn’t wait — can’t wait. he’s too far gone. 

with one quick thrust, he’s inside you, burying himself to the hilt, and the feeling of your tight, wet heat around him almost sends him into tears right then and there.

“oh fuck… oh fuck, you’re so tight,” he whimpers, his voice cracking as he pulls out just to slam back into you. his whole body shudders as he moves, and the way he’s already so deep inside you has you gasping beneath him, clenching around his thick length as his pace picks up.

but choso’s not done. no, the moment he feels your walls tighten around him, it’s like something snaps in him, and his thrusts grow frantic, sloppy, desperate. he’s fucking you like a man possessed, eyes squeezed shut as he babbles uncontrollably, his hands gripping your hips so tight they’ll probably leave marks.

“f-fuck, fuck, you’re so —” his voice cracks again, and you realize with a start that he’s whimpering, his hips stuttering as he pounds into you harder, chasing the high that’s building inside him. “so good, baby… so good for me, so tight, i can’t — i can’t fucking take it. i’m… oh god, i’m gonna cum already, i —”

you can hear the panic in his voice, his breath coming in short, ragged gasps as he tries to hold himself back. but he can’t. you’re too perfect, too tight, too cute, and it’s driving him out of his mind.

“choso…” you moan, reaching up to pull him down closer, his face now buried in the crook of your neck as he fucks into you with abandon, his hips slapping against yours with every desperate thrust. you can feel the wet heat of his tears against your skin, and the sound of his broken whimpers sends a shiver down your spine.

“i-i can’t… i can’t do it,” he chokes out, his voice thick with emotion as he presses himself impossibly deeper, grinding into you with each thrust. “you’re too much… too perfect. i don’t deserve you — fuck, you’re so tight. ‘m sorry, baby, i can’t help it. i can’t… oh god, i’m gonna cum, i’m so close…”

his words are spilling out in a continuous stream of needy, pussy-drunk babbling, and you can feel just how close he is, his cock twitching inside you as his movements grow more erratic. and then you hear it — the softest little sob escaping his lips as he completely loses himself in the sensation of you, his thrusts turning messy, frantic, desperate to reach his release.

as choso pounds into you, body trembling from the overwhelming pleasure, his tear-filled eyes catch a glimpse of the cat ears perched on your head. the fuzzy little things are slightly askew — probably from how hard he's been fucking you — but they’re still there, perched so cutely on top of your head. for a moment, the sight of you, flushed and panting beneath him with those ears still on, nearly short-circuits his brain.

he swears he can barely see straight, his vision blurred by the tears filling his eyes, but when those ears come back into focus, it drives him insane — completely insane.

“f-fuck,” he snarls, though his voice cracks from desperation, a dangerous mix of aggression and need. his hips slam into you harder, each thrust deeper, more punishing. “god, y-you… look at you. those fucking ears. you think you can just wear them and expect me to hold back?”

his words are slurred, teetering between broken babbling and rough, possessive snarls. it’s like he’s warring with himself, torn between the raw need to destroy you and the overwhelming softness he feels, the need to hold on to something so precious.

“cute little thing… driving me fucking insane,” he growls low, his grip tightening on your hips as his cock slams even deeper inside you. “you’re mine, baby — mine — you get that? nobody else gets to see you like this. nobody else gets to have you. you’re all fucking mine.”

he’s panting heavily, chest heaving, his voice cracking between each rough thrust as his emotions churn violently inside him. he wants to be soft, to worship how cute you are, but something darker claws its way to the surface, the possessiveness boiling over into something almost primal.

his head dips down, tears staining his flushed cheeks, but his gaze locks on those ears again — the ears he bought for the both of you, for that stupid halloween party you were supposed to go to tonight — but instead, you’re beneath him, completely cock-drunk, and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

“fuck… baby,” his voice turns shaky, whiny even, but there’s a hard edge to it, like he’s just barely holding on. “you’re… you’re so fucking cute, i can’t — god, i can’t —” his thrusts grow erratic, hips slamming wildly into you as he whimpers and moans, overwhelmed by your tight heat and the image of those cat ears on your head.

“shit… those fucking ears…” he chokes out, voice cracking as his hands come up to grab your wrists, pinning them above your head roughly. “you think — fuck — you think i’m just gonna let this slide? you look too cute, baby… you… you don’t get it… i’m gonna ruin you — fuck, i’m gonna ruin this cute little body.”

you whimper beneath him, and he lets out a shaky, guttural groan. his cock twitches deep inside you, harder than ever, and he swears the sight of you in those ears makes him lose whatever fragile control he had left.

“don’t look at me like that,” he snarls, voice raw as he leans down, lips brushing over your neck, leaving biting kisses along the way. “fuck… i c-can’t take it. you’re gonna make me fucking lose it. i… i’ll never let you go… never. you’re too perfect — too fucking perfect for me to share.”

his hips snap against yours, harder, faster, desperate as he battles the overwhelming need to own you completely. he growls in your ear, teeth grazing your skin, each possessive word dripping from his mouth like venom.

“n-no one… no one else can touch you like this,” he spits, voice trembling between aggression and whining, his need for you overwhelming. “they even try, and i’ll fucking kill them. i’ll kill anyone who thinks they can take you from me.”

his tone is feral, his hips driving into you with an intensity that makes you dizzy, but then his gaze flickers back to your face, tear-streaked and beautiful, those fucking cat ears still on, and his aggression melts back into a whimper.

“oh god — oh god, baby,” he babbles, voice slurred and desperate, as his thrusts grow frantic, erratic. “you’re… so cute, so fucking cute — gonna make me… make me fucking cum so hard, i can’t — fuck, you’re too much…”

his hands are shaking, body trembling as he grips your wrists even tighter, nearly shaking as he leans down to kiss you, his lips needy, teeth grazing your bottom lip.

“y-you’re mine,” he babbles, voice cracking with emotion. “you’re mine… my pretty little kitty… i can’t let you go, can’t ever let you go. fuck, i’ll — i’ll destroy anyone who tries…”

and then his blurry vision catches those ears again, the fuzzy little things wobbling slightly as he pounds into you, and something snaps inside him. his cock twitches violently, his whole body shaking with how close he is to completely losing control.

“god — don’t move those ears,” he whines, breath hitching as he slams into you, rough and deep. “please… please… baby, keep them on, f-for me… you look so fucking cute — i… i can’t…”

his voice is high-pitched now, slurred, and teetering on a sob. the desperation in his tone is palpable, the way he’s clinging to you like he’s afraid you’ll disappear.

“gonna cum so fucking hard — so fucking hard, baby — oh fuck, i can’t… can’t take it — i’m gonna fucking fill you up,” he cries out, body tensing as he gets impossibly rougher, driven purely by instinct and overwhelming lust. “you’re mine. all fucking mine.”

with one final, erratic thrust, he buries himself deep inside you, his cock twitching violently as he finally spills inside you, letting out a broken cry. his whole body shakes, tears streaming down his cheeks as he clings to you desperately.

“thank you, t-thank you, baby,” he whimpers through labored breaths, his voice trembling as his cock continues to throb inside you. “you’re mine… my pretty little kitty… n-never… never letting you go…”

his voice trails off into soft whimpers as he continues to thrust weakly into you, his cock still twitching as he fills you up, his mind completely lost in the overwhelming pleasure. and as you finally let yourself go, cumming around him with a soft moan, you can feel him trembling beneath you, his breath coming in short, ragged gasps as he holds you close, his heart still racing.

and even as he’s coming down from his high, his cock still buried deep inside you, he catches another glimpse of those cat ears, and it makes him shudder, his body reacting like he’s ready to go again.

“fuck… those ears…” he murmurs, breathless. “god… you’re so perfect. too fucking perfect…i love you” he whispers brokenly, pressing soft kisses to your neck as he finally starts to come down from his high. “i love you so much… fuck, baby, you’re too cute. i can’t handle it…”

SUGURU always liked to admire you in every possible way. 

from the casual days when you’d wear oversized hoodies and sunhats, to those cutesy moments when you managed to convince him to match your ridiculous frog hats. no matter what you had on, you always looked perfect to him. well, except for one thing.

cat ears.

he’s never seen you wear those, and when he brings it up, you always laugh it off. “they’re so outdated, sugu! plus, it’s so cringe.” but suguru? he isn’t going to let that go so easily.

he’s stubborn when it comes to these little things, especially when it involves the idea of seeing you in something so specific, something that could flip a switch deep inside him.

tonight, it’s one of those nights where you both get lost in the heady intensity of the moment, the dim lights casting just enough of a shadow to make everything feel deliciously intimate. you’re on all fours, his strong hands gripping your waist as he takes you from behind, deep and slow at first, like he’s savoring every second, every sound you make.

your voice is hoarse from crying out, pleads slipping through your lips between breathy moans. “s-suguru, please… it feels —” you gasp as he tightens the custom choker around your throat, his name engraved in delicate diamonds. it’s tighter than usual tonight, just enough to cut off your air supply in a way that leaves you dizzy, your senses on fire.

“what was that, pretty?” he growls, leaning over you, his lips brushing your ear as his fingers dig into your hips, steadying your trembling body. “use your words.”

“so… so good,” you manage to choke out, your voice barely a whisper. “feels so —”

before you can finish, he pulls back, his hands leaving your waist for just a second, and you feel the cool touch of something being placed on your head. you don’t even have time to react before he’s shoving your face into the mattress, his weight pinning you down as his pace picks up, thrusts harder, rougher.

“look at you,” he mutters, and you feel his hand tangling in your hair, yanking your head back roughly so your body arches. your vision blurs from the tears pooling in your eyes, but you catch a glimpse of his digicam in the mirror propped up at the side of the bed. he always films these moments, every expression you make, every time you fall apart beneath him.

but this time, it’s different. he’s got you in focus, every angle perfect, and then you see them — cat ears perched on your head.

“suguru, what —”

“shh,” he cuts you off with a tug on your hair, forcing you to keep your eyes locked on the mirror, on the sight of yourself wearing those ears he’s gifted you. “just look at yourself. you see how pretty you are? wearing the ears i bought you, wearing my choker —” his voice drops to a low, teasing purr. “— you’re mine. every part of you.”

your heart races as you meet your own reflection, your face flushed and tear-streaked, the cat ears perfectly perched on your head like some twisted accessory, the choker around your neck shimmering in the dim light as a constant reminder of who you belong to.

“suguru, i —”

“quiet,” he growls, yanking your head back harder, his other hand gripping your throat, just under the choker, applying pressure until your breath hitches. “you’ll speak when i tell you to.”

you whimper, your body trembling under the intensity of it all — the way he’s controlling every part of you, making you watch yourself fall apart in front of his camera, the weight of his dominance heavy in the air.

he pulls out suddenly, only to push you down onto your back, the shift in position making your head spin. your legs instinctively wrap around his waist as he leans over you, the digicam still recording every movement, every expression.

“look at you,” he says again, his voice low, rough, as his eyes roam over your body, the way the cat ears frame your face. “so fucking perfect. you don’t even know, do you?”

you shake your head weakly, tears still threatening to spill as you gasp for breath, his pace relentless as he thrusts into you again, harder this time. your hands claw at his back, desperate to hold onto something, anything.

“these ears suit you,” he grins, leaning down to kiss you, biting your bottom lip just hard enough to make you gasp. “makes you look like the perfect little pet f’me.”

the intensity of his words, his actions, everything sends you spiraling. “s-sugu—”

“that’s right, baby,” he groans, eyes half-lidded as he watches the way you struggle to keep up, the way your body trembles beneath him. “keep saying my name. let me hear you.”

you can barely speak anymore, your throat raw from moaning and crying out, but his demand is enough to push you over the edge, and you scream his name, feeling the overwhelming pleasure rip through your body.

“that’s my girl,” he mutters, his voice low and possessive as he watches you, his hand wrapping around your throat once more, his thumb brushing over the choker. “mine. every single inch of you.”

he finishes right after you, his breath ragged as he presses his body into yours, keeping you pinned under him as you both ride out the high. but his eyes don’t leave you for a second. your expression — completely dazed, flushed, lips parted as you struggle to catch your breath — does something to him, sparks something primal.

"fuck," he growls, barely giving you a moment before he’s reaching for the digicam on the nightstand, grabbing it almost too roughly, and shoving it in your face. you’re too lost in your post-climax haze to register what’s happening right away, until you feel his hand gripping your chin, forcing you to look directly into the lens.

“look at you,” he hisses, eyes dark with lust and something more — something dangerous. “look at how fucking sinful you look right now. all ruined for me.”

he holds your face tight, his fingers digging into your skin as he angles the camera, making sure every inch of your flushed, wrecked face is caught on film. you can’t even think straight, your mind still clouded, but the possessiveness in his voice, the way his eyes burn with something obsessive, has you trembling.

“you know you’re mine, don’t you?” his voice is a low, dangerous growl, sending shivers down your spine. “no one else gets to see you like this. no one else gets to touch you, to fuck you. only me.”

you nod weakly, but that’s not enough for him. he leans closer, his grip on your chin tightening, the edge in his voice unmistakable. “say it.”

“i-i’m yours,” you stammer, barely able to get the words out as he holds you there, your face still shoved in front of the camera, the red recording light reflecting in his eyes like a predator cornering its prey.

“damn right you are,” he sneers, satisfied, but his hand doesn’t let go. his gaze hardens, and the next words that leave his mouth send a chill through your bones. “and if anyone tries to come between us — anyone tries to take you from me —” he pauses, smirking darkly, “they won’t even live long enough to regret it.”

you blink through the haze, and it’s then that you realize his breathing’s gotten more erratic, and his eyes — those deep, sharp eyes —are nearly wild now, like something inside him has snapped. he’s still holding the camera close to your face, filming every inch of your wrecked expression, but now he’s... rambling. a dark, possessive stream of thoughts that pours from his lips without pause, like he’s talking more to himself than to you.

“no one else could ever have you. no one else could even come close. you’re too perfect for anyone but me. and god, if anyone even thought about coming between us…” his grip on your chin tightens, hard enough that it’s starting to hurt. “i’d tear them apart. no hesitation. i’d make sure they’d never touch you, never even look at you again.”

you shudder beneath him, a small part of you, deep in the back of your mind, that’s starting to feel... worried. the way he’s talking, the intensity in his voice — it’s like he’s slipping away, like you’re reaching for him, but he’s just out of reach.

you try to speak, to pull him back. “s-suguru, i —”

but he isn’t listening. his hand cups your face now, almost tenderly, but the look in his eyes is anything but. “you’d never leave me, right? you’d never... try to go?” his voice softens for a moment, but the sharp edge is still there, hovering just beneath the surface. “because if you did... well, i don’t think i’d be able to handle that. i’d lose it. completely. and, darling, i’m not sure what i’d do.”

he’s still filming you, still holding your face, but his grip is tighter now, more desperate. you can feel the tension in his body, the way his words seem to carry a weight that’s sinking deeper and deeper into his mind. your heart races, not just from the intensity of everything but from the realization that something about this moment has him teetering on the edge.

you swallow hard, trying to keep your voice steady, trying to pull him back to you. “suguru, i’m not going anywhere,” you whisper, though your breath hitches with the pressure of his hand. “i’m yours, remember?”

his eyes flicker, and for a second, you see the suguru you know, the one who adores you, the one who treats you like you’re his entire world. but it’s fleeting, and before you can even catch your breath, he’s leaning in closer, the camera still recording, his voice dropping to a near-maniacal whisper.

“mine,” he repeats, almost to himself, like he’s reaffirming it, reassuring himself. “always mine.”

and as his lips brush against your ear, his breath hot and shaky, you can’t help but feel that slight tug of fear deep in your gut. he’s still your suguru — your darling suguru — but right now… he’s out of reach. you can only hope that the next time he pulls you close, he won’t hold you too tightly.

coming up next . . . bunny girls ! starring gojo satoru & toji fushiguro ♰ — comment to be added to taglist ♡

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[lostinlads]

Delicious Desire

Synopsis: after a heavy makeout session, xavier finds out that you've never been eaten out. he takes it upon himself to bless you with his mouth

Tags: xavier x afab!reader, MDNI IF YOU ARE A MINOR YOU WILL BE BLOCKED, no use of y/n, smut, porn with little plot, not proofread, not edited, xavier is a MUNCH, eating out, fingering, first time, not virgin mc, use of pet names (angel, beautiful, bun), tongue fucking

Words: 2.1k

a/n: this is my first smut fic i have written in a WHILE so please be kind as i find my footing again! but shout out to my horny xavier moots on twitter for making me want to write this bc i wasn't going to do one shots for a while. anyway xavier is a munch that man is a slut and i love his ass sm! thank you for reading!

ao3 | kofi

Your relationship with Xavier was still pretty new, so many beautiful firsts with each other that will forever be engrained in your mind.

This morning was no different.

You two spent the night at his apartment, binging movies and snacking all night until the two of you fell asleep in each other's arms on his soft bed. Waking with the soft morning rays on your face, your boyfriend already awake with his head resting on your chest, fingers drawing small circles onto the flesh of your stomach.

Sweet nothings said between the both of you, enjoying each other's company.

Until you find yourself on his lap, mouths working against each other as you thread your fingers through his feathery locks. His strong arms wrap around you, holding you in place as you slowly grind your hips against his. Your mind growing fuzzy, getting drunk at the feeling of Xavier's lips on yours, the way he nibbles at your bottom lip before sucking it. The fluttering deep in your stomach never ending at every small movement under you, his hard cock growing larger with every move you make.

Xavier breaks your kiss, his lips trailing down your neck before sucking at the sensitive spot at the base. A moan slips from your lips, earning a satisfied hum from him, vibrating on your skin only making your head spin more. This wasn't the first time you've been in this situation with him, heavy make out sessions were inevitable with how whipped he is for you. Him knowing exactly what buttons to press for you to sing so sweetly for him, it drove him insane.

"Bun," Xavier nearly whined against your throat, your hips bucking slightly at just his voice alone. Fingers tightening in his hair.

"Hm?" You hum, words failing to form on your tongue. He nips, another gasp fluttering from your lungs.

"Wanna taste you," He mumbles, hands gripping your sides as he guides your hips against him, making you feel how fucking strung out he was on you. You blink, confused. Eyebrows knitting together as you try to piece together his words through the thick fog in your mind.

"What?" He groans, lips still abusing your neck as you feel his hot tongue lap at your skin.

"Please let me eat you bun," He begs. "You're driving me insane, please let me." Xavier thrusts his hips up to you, grinding his hard cock against your clothed heat as if to show you just how much he wanted this. You pull back, a whine leaving his lips as he loses contact.

"Uh-" Cheeks flaming, you don't meet his eyes. This was... unexpected to say the least. You weren't new to sex, having lovers in the past, but none of them ever ate you out before.

"If you aren't comfortable, angel, we don't have to," His hand coming to caress your face, thumb brushing your cheek softly as he reassured you. It's not that you didn't want to, you just were inexperienced.

"No, no," You start, shaking your head as you finally meet his awaiting eyes. Fuck, those eyes. Pupils blown wide with lust and want, glossy and searching as he waited for you to answer. "I just haven't... before..." You trail off, hands gliding over his clothed chest, heartbeat pounding against your skin. Xavier is silent for a pause, eyes flicking between yours as he takes in your words.

"No one has ever eaten you out before?" He almost sounds offended for you. You shake your head, heat from your cheeks stretching to the tips of your ears.

"No, it's never been brought up," A small smile grows on his gorgeous face as his hands run down your sides, gripping your plush thighs.

"We'll just have to change that then."

Xavier flips you over in a fluid motion, him looming over your shocked body as his eyes grow dark. Your boyfriend quickly strips of his shirt, tossing it behind him somewhere in the room. He looks starved, almost ravenous as he leans in, lips to your neck again. This time his assault isn't as graceful, needy and sloppy as he drools on your skin as he makes his way down to your chest. Hands sliding under the hem of your shirt, fingers grazing your skin as they roam over your stomach and waist. You arch your back, hot breath panting from your mouth as he makes his way down your body. Wetness pooling between your thighs as you feel the all too familiar tingle.

"So pretty for me," He mumbles against the soft skin of your exposed stomach, placing a soft, delicate kiss to it before he settles between your thighs. His hands run down, slowly spreading them as his eyes stay locked on your clothed heat. The only thing keeping him from his meal is a flimsy pair of sleep shorts and your soaked underwear. His pupils dilate, almost consuming the blue of his beautiful eyes. Tongue darting out as he swipes his lips, saliva glossing in the morning light. You wanted to drink him in when he looked like this, already so ruined for you and nothing even happened.

"May I?" Fingers curling under the waistband of your shorts, eyes flicking up to meet yours, pleading. You would pause time if you could, stay in this moment to stare at his face forever.

"Yes," Voice nothing more than a whisper as you breathe the single word out. Without a second thought Xavier pulls the shorts down your legs, eyeing your weeping cunt through your soaked panties. He groans, hands spreading you further as he leans in.

You gasp as his lips brush your inner thigh, hands fisting the sheets. He places a soft kiss to the fat of your thigh, then another, peppering your skin with the most loving caresses.

"You don't know how long I've been waiting for this, angel," He moans into you, pulling back so his face is right in front of your heat. The scene in front of you unfolds in almost slow motion, Xavier leaning down, lips placing a soft kiss to your clothed clit. Your stomach jumps, breath hitching as his tongue flattens, licking a stripe up your panties.

"Smell fucking divine," His tongue diving back in to lap at you through your underwear once more. A soft whimper leaving your lips, snapping him out of his high, eyes dancing over your face. You pull your lip between your teeth, nibbling on it as you sit under his intense gaze.

Xavier pulls down your panties, an agonizingly slow pace almost as if he wants to tease you. You watch the obscene string of your cum connecting your cunt and panties snap. He sucks in a breath as you lay bare, exposed to him. The cool air hits your slick heat, a chill running down your spine as goosebumps rise in its wake. Xavier swears under his breath, air fanning over your cunt making you squirm. You could see the last of his control slipping, fingers digging into your skin as he closes his eyes, taking a deep breath. He would be the end of you today.

Anticipation wells in the pit of your stomach, wanting nothing more than his tongue pleasuring you, to experience why he craves it so bad. You wiggle your hips, coaxing him to give in. Xavier's eyes flutter back open, looking only at your face.

"Eyes stay on me, beautiful," Before you notice the pink tip of his tongue poke through his plush lips.

He leans into his meal, fingers coming to part your lips as his tongue finally makes contact and-

Fuck.

Fuck.

A string of moans flows from your parted lips, back arching off of the bed again as his tongue licks again. Eyes never breaking contact with you, his lips come to wrap around your clit. He sucks greedily, cheeks hollowing as he moans. The vibrations ricochet up your heat, fluttering around in your stomach as your hands grip the sheets tighter, knuckles a ghostly white.

You feel the tip of his tongue add to the mix, lapping at your bud as he continues to suck. How were you supposed to last longer than five minutes with him working you like this? The coil hot inside you as you shift your hips, grinding your cunt on his face. You swear you feel him smile before he lets go, tongue prodding at your entrance.

"Oh my god-" You gasp, his saliva and your slick mixing together beautifully as his tongue glides into you. Xavier slurps, sucking down your spilling juices. You swear it's the most erotic sight you've ever seen.

"You taste so good for me, bun," Lips grazing your pussy as he speaks. He places another soft kiss to your cunt before he flattens his tongue, long strokes to your slit. His eyes never waver, locked onto your flushed face as he continues to pleasure you at an agonizingly slow pace. Wanting to saver you, your taste, your expressions, your soft fluttering moans.

Xavier's nose bumps your clit as he glides his tongue up, thighs twitching as your eyes roll for a split second before snapping back down to his blushing face.

You couldn't help yourself, hand releasing she sheet before reaching forward. Your fingers thread through his hair, tugging softly at his scalp earning a beautiful grunt from the man devouring you. Sweat shining on his forehead, plastering his hair to his face, the light blond locks turning darker. You've never seen him like this before, so lustful, so needy. It tightened the coil deep in your stomach, a heavy moan flowing freely.

His tongue glides back down to your entrance again, sliding between your gummy walls.

"Oh my god, Xav," You gasp, lungs not getting enough air. Hips grinding on his face, wet tongue burying deeper inside of you.

"That's it, bun," Breathy, fucked out voice blessing your ears. "Fuck yourself on my face for me." You couldn't help yourself, head falling back into the pillows as you buck, pressing his face further as you grip his hair tight in your fist. You were getting close, the wet sounds of his tongue fucking inside of you so deep bouncing off of the walls of his room, making your head so fuzzy. Mind going numb, the only thing you could think of is how you have gone this long without this pleasure before.

His nose brushes against your clit again, eyes rolling so far back you swear you could see your own brain. Hips lifting from the bed as you chase your high, wanting nothing to cum on his face. Xavier grinds hid leaking cock into the mattress, reeling in the pleasure he is gracing you with, getting off on that alone.

"Look at me, beautiful. Please, let me see your pretty fucked out face." Vulgar words you've never heard from him, voice so whiney you couldn't help but obey. Opening your eyes, glancing back down at him. You watch his hips hump into the bed, his lips wrapping around your clit before you feel one of his long, slender fingers fuck its way inside of you.

"Gonna... cum-" You manage to choke out, a cry of pleasure leaving your lips as he adds another finger, curling just right to hit that sweet spot inside of you.

"Me too, angel," He moans, the sound so beautiful it buzzes in your brain.

The sounds of him slurping your leaking cunt becomes too much, his hair tickling your thighs, his fingers hitting in you just right. The band in you snaps, hips lifting from the bed, back arching as you cry out to him. His moans join yours, blue eyes half lidded as his noises vibrate in your heat. Your cum coating his hand, dripping down his wrist as his hips stutter before halting as he cums in his pants. 

Xavier's fingers slip out of you as he rests his head on your thigh, lips and chin glossy. Your hand falls to his damp cheek, a lazy smile spreading on his lips. You couldn't help but be in awe, how ethereal he looks after he cums, your work of art.

"That was..." You breathe out, brain fuzzy as you try to find the words. He laughs, hand caressing your thigh.

"You did so well for me," Nothing but love and admiration in his soft voice. "Let's get you cleaned up so we can go back to bed." Wet lips plant a kiss to your thigh before he stands, a wet patch spread on his pajama pants.

[bigfatbimbo]

I love you like an Alcoholic

2.1k words,, Bill x Reader

a/n — You did it, you saved the town.

warnings — NSFW, dom!reader, sub!Bill, toxic relationships, book of bill time era, orgasm denial, ambiguous superpowers, NOT PROOFREAD**

summary — Bill goes to his incredibly powerful (moreso than him) business partner, you, to try to get him out of theraprism. Things take a turn.

“I had to pull a lot of strings for this Bill,” you cross your legs and lean back in your thrown. 

Bill straightens his bow-tie, “Well toots, what if I told you I can make it worth your while?”

You breathe and then get up from your chair, “I’d tell you to stop floating in my lair. It’s distracting.”

Snapping your fingers, a bar appears in your otherwise empty room. While pouring yourself a drink, you can feel Bills eye-roll from across the room.

With a tip of his hat, his more human form appears, and sits down at the bar stool next to you. “Better?”

“Could do with more abs.”

He laughs but doesn’t change his appearance, “So, y/n. We go way back, right? I’m not gonna sugar code it, you’ve always been one of my favorites to do business with, doll. Wanna know why?”

“The fact i’m always so interested in what you have to say?”

His eye practically twitched at your indifference. Your attention was never payed in full. “Ha! Don’t flatter your self, pal. No, i’ll tell you why: did you know out of everyone in the galaxy, you’re the only equal I do business with?”

Your eyebrow arches, “equal?”

“Humor me,” he doesn’t give you the chance to reply before continuing. “Now, given my current position in ‘necessary therapy’—“ he makes a point of doing obnoxious air quotes, “—I don’t have much to occupy my days. And we both know i’d be of better use to you out here, right?”

You took another sip of your wine before getting up from the bar and walking over to your throne. The bar disappears behind you, leaving cipher ass-flat on the ground.

“Oh come on—“ His open eye turns red momentarily, before he dusts himself off, “Look, it’s hard being a god, y/n, I know that much. With that responsibility, I think a business partner would do you good. And all you’d have to do is bail me out, that’s practically no downside for you at all, buddy.”

Your patience had been wearing thin, and without further consideration you let out a larger grown from your chair, “Cipher, you’re a liability. I don’t want you. I’m honestly struggling to find enjoyment in sharing a drink with you, despite our history.”

A flick of your hand lifts him off his feet and brings him over to you, “Thought you had a no floating policy, eh?” There’s no fear in his voice, but there is in his eye. He’s losing.

“I’m gonna make this clear to you. You’re gonna take your disgusting human form, and you’re gonna march your happy ass back to theraprism, and you’re gonna stay there. Want my advice? Stop being so damn pathetic.”

A portal opens to take him back and he struggles in your invisible grasp, “No, wait! Please, I’ll do anything, just wait!” 

A human form was already a disadvantage, one he’d accepted in order to strike a deal, but a disadvantage still. And he hadn’t had any contact in a long time, aside from various psychiatrists telling him what’s ’wrong with him.’ 

So, you being someone he has history with could have contributed to his annoyingly human problem. Maybe it was the excitement, your attention or the lack there of, but something terrible happened at that moment. 

“Jesus, Bill. You really have hit rock bottom,” You murmur to yourself as you pull his floating body closer to you, your fingers dance around the bulge without touching it.

“Hey, hey, watch it— Your the one that made me have this stupid fleshbag, anyways— cut that out!” He struggled in the air, finding that he just couldn’t turn back into his normal form. You’re doing, he’d assume. 

To his dismay, you giggle and lean back, “Well now i’m enjoying myself. Now this I could help with, Cipher,”

“Ah, ah pass! Just get me down from here and—“ Back to prison? He’d have to swallow his pride on this one. And besides, it’s not like he wouldn’t like it… “Whatever you want, doll. I’m here all night.”

You examine him further, “Is that so?” 

Before he can answer, you drop him to his knees in front of you. “Ow! Careful with the merchandise, sweetheart. I’m not in mint condition these days— ah!”

Your foot presses down lightly on the bulge in his pants, and your fingers grab onto his chin, “Been a minute since we’ve done this. Huh, Cipher?”

He nods, going to say something, before you interject, “So i’d be good if I was you, baby.”

You press down on his hard-on with more pressure, watching Ciphers face flicker, biting his lip, before letting on a whimper. 

Despite not being his first encounter, so to speak, with you of this nature, it never failed to eat as his pride. And furthermore, despite this, it felt good. If Bill was anything, he was selfish. He could admit he was letting it happen for himself, instead of in spite of himself. So it can’t be that humiliating?

But in this position, there’s always shame.

“Y/n — give me a break—“ He breathed, eye twitching. 

You rolled your eyes and snapped your fingers, with that, his pants were gone and his dick was exposed. That’s another thing he could do without: your unpredictability 

“Next time, say please. Asshole.” You say, lifting him up with your powers once more.

“Wow, buddy. I’m not the one being the jerk here—“ It came out quick, as Bill words often did. But these ones he regretted immediately.

Your eyebrows furrowed, “Tough crowd?” He felt a sensation tugging at the base of his dick, indicating the start of mind games that wouldn’t end anytime soon.

He backtracked. Play it off. “Yeesh, you’re a tough crowd! Did I say jerk? You heard me wrong, I meant lovely— Ah, wait! Wait!”

A wave of pleasure flooded his senses abruptly, followed by a short pinch of pain, similar to what a mortal feels when they prick their finger on a piece of metal. Does that happen a lot? They’re all so clutsy, can’t be that out of the ordinary—

“Smooth talk your way out and maybe I’ll lighten the blow, yeah?” You smile cruelly, hand dangling out, flexing as if teasing what you could do to him.

“I— I know we’ve had our disagreements but I— augh!” A spike of pain, his eye rolled back a bit, “You— I’ve always admired your work— Yes! Respected you even, you’re an idol, sweetheart, ah, yes!”

With each compliment a burst of pleasure would go through him, landing at his unnatural dick, now leaking with precum. He was nearly babbling, but he was as aware of that as he was aware of the fact it was dearly encouraged.

“Very good, Billy. You’re too sweet, really.” Your voice was smooth and you bit your lip, watching him writhe with pleasure mid-air.

“A-anything for you, toots! Ah, more, more!”

He didn’t notice he said anything wrong this time until it was too late, but your face had noticeably darkened at the statement. 

“That’s awful demanding for someone in your position, dontcha’ think?” You weren’t actually mad, of course you weren’t. But you loved to you with him, and you took every opportunity. One of the reasons Bill tried to avoid you when he could; you were far too similar people, dealing in cruelty for the sake of entertainment.

“Wha- No wait!” The attention to his dick ceased to exist, and he was left with only aching for attention again, despite the fact you never gave anything physical in the first place. 

All mind games. “That’s- That’s not fair!”

“I’d watch who you were talking too, baby,” You flick your hand, spreading out his body parts mid air, hard leaking cock protruding out, crying for any kind of sensation. 

“You know what I can do. I’m sure I don’t have to remind you,” You sigh expectantly.

Bill tried to speak to defend himself, to talk his way out, but he found his ability to gone.

“I can make you do what I want, Cipher. Can make you feel whatever I want. Extraordinary pain—“ He cries out for a split second, eye flashing with fear, “—Or overwhelming pleasure.”

This time his eye rolled back, and he moans in wonderful agony, unable to move expect for wriggling his body parts weakly. His dick twitched.

“You like that feeling?”

He nods weakly, eyes fogging up, letting a small whimper escape.

“Don’t want me to hurt you?” Another nod, “Want me to make you feel good? Think you deserve it?”

“Ah— y/n, I need…” He swallows, revising his words in his mind, “Please, I need this.”

It’s true, Bill had never reached such a low in his entire existence. And he wasn’t sure if this interaction was pushing him further down or making him feel better. Now, however, he was struggling to think.

“Aw, baby. You have taken your punishment well? Been having a rough time too..” Your tone switched to something softer, almost to a condescending note.

His pathetic appearance did him justice, he pretended this was on purpose. 

Either way, a whine slipped from his throat and he shut his eyes, playing into it. You cooed in response, bringing him closer to you in order to run your hand along the side of his cheek. 

A spurt of pleasure shoots through his dick once more, and now he can’t help but yearn for something more. “Touch me— I need it— Please.” He threw in, trying to help his chances, despite the struggle at forming a coherent thought other than need.

“Hm,” You consider. Finally you reach out, running a finger along the base of his cock, to the tip. “You really want me to?”

He nodded desperately, mouth falling open to let out a small whine. Swear bedded his hot, red face, and dripped down, make his multiple chins glisten. Ugh, you preferred him further away. His already greasy looking hair was now slick against his forehead, and his eyes were glazed over. 

You slowly shift all of your fingers onto his shaft and then saintly drag them up and down for the first few strokes. A gutteral whimper falls from Ciphers mouth, “Oh, yes!”

“What do we say, baby?” You ask, grip tightening suddenly as if to bring him back to reality, but not too tight. 

“Ah— Thank you!” He’d almost forgotten to detest you for making him say that. And he’d almost forgotten to remind himself to be mad after he was done feeling good.

He used to daydream about taking you down after these sessions. Rising to power and having you at his feet. But now he only wants to keep your attention on him. Now it’s all he can think about. 

You continue to stroke his leaking cock, leaning in to kiss his cheek fat, “Good boy.”

He moaned, “Don’t do that-“

“I’m not patronizing you. I mean it, you’re acting better than usual and i’m glad. Maybe you’re more desperate, or touch-starved, but you’re doing good. I’m proud of you, sweetheart.”

“Ah—“ He would have came right there if he could. And in the most literal sense, he couldn’t. You weren’t letting him. “Please, let me come. I can’t do this, have mercy, I’ll do anything—“

“I don’t know, I’m having a good time. Why should I?” Another desperate need to release wipes over him, an uncontrollable need that was actively being controlled. 

Despite himself, he teared up. His fingers rose to touch his face, which he realized, was now damp with falling tears, “No, no, no! I can’t- I’ve never- Human bodies— I need to. Please!”

You look at him and smile. 

“I’ve been good,” He reminded you.

With that, you have in. Your other hand moved away to snap your fingers, a gesture that wasn’t need to carry out the action, but to show that he’d earned his reward. 

“Yes! Thank you! Oh gods— Oh-“ He leaned back, finally having the orgasm that was being withheld from him. And god, it felt good.

You felt good, and he hated that. 

[tswkento]

oh boy, just going to the gym with nanami for shits and giggles <33

one day, when every single thing in your schedules seem to be working against you with intentions of keeping you apart until the evening, you think to yourself “no, this won’t do” and decide that you will spend at least a couple of hours with your nanami before he has to go to work.

it’s 7 in the morning so he gives you a sleep ridden and very confused look when you energetically jump out of bed and urge him to wake up too, excited like a kid going to an amusement park, but doesn’t argue after seeing how much you want to spend time with him.

it happens to be nanami’s gym day and you, (let’s pretend) a person who’s never really been a gym enthusiast, act like it’s a whole new adventure: a bright beam on your lips as you jump on your feet impatiently, hand pulling at his as you tug him towards the local gym he usually goes to. and kento is pretty fine with that, the corners of his lips curling up at your whines about him being slow as he gazes down at you with a fond look.

and oh is it a fun 2 hours for you.

not only you get to watch your beautiful boyfriend work his well-built muscles, but you also get to run around and try everything out. of course, it gets you a couple of weirded out glances and annoyed glares, but you don’t give a damn because nanami simply follows you around and explains how everything works so you don’t accidentally injure yourself. and he is so patient it makes you swoon :(

you don’t seem too interested in anything in particular, but as soon as nanami touches a machine he needs for himself — you are already staring up at him with puppy eyes, begging him to show you how he uses it. biting back a smile, nanami shakes his head in faux disapproval and still does it.

the mesmerised expression on your face is very distracting, however the ‘ohh’s and ‘ahh’s you let out are literally a lethal weapon. you can’t help yourself though! nanami looks so good in a simple tee and shorts; his burly arms pumped enough to make the shirt seem small on him, his form seemingly larger and more intimidating, thick, smooth muscles visibly moving under the thin fabric, under his skin.

you find yourself just sitting down and admiring him, your palm supporting your cheek and a dreamy look on your face that makes him scoff as he ruffles your hair and accepts the water bottle you offer him.

nanami absolutely adores your company too; your endless yapping is a great distraction and he can admit that it’s great to have you close after work has been keeping you apart for a while now, he just can’t understand why neither of you didn’t think of doing this earlier. he also likes seeing your cute puffed out cheeks whenever you try to keep dumbbells above your head or lift the barbell that he was using, although, he has to stop you before you rip something.

as a reward, nanami also lets you sit on his back while he does push-ups, smiling to himself at the sound of your giggles and ‘yaaay’s.

so you make it a happy occasion to visit the gym with him once in a while, just to spend more time together and share cute and sweet moments <33

[chaos-in-deepspace]

LNDS Spicy Headcanons | 18+

Well I did generalized headcanons for the boys, now we need to get into the spice headcanons. Which honestly is one of my favorite things to write. I regret nothing when it comes to Rafayel's part.

Disclaimer: This is an original fan work for “Love and Deepspace”. Do not repost on other platforms or plagiarize. All characters shown in this fic is 18+. Warnings: 18+ Headcanons, Cockwarming, Consensual Somnophilia, Sexting, Dom/Sub Dynamics, Bathtub Sex, Mentions of Oral (M!Receiving), Non-Human Anatomy

Blog Information | Masterlist

Xavier

One of the kinkiest men you will ever meet. Is willing to try everything at least once if given the option. The worst part is he doesn't seem like the type at all until you're in the bedroom with him and you realize you might be in danger.

He is normally on top, but doesn't mind being a switch, especially when he's tired. If you want to take charge and pamper him, then by all means. As long as you don't tease him too much he'll let you do just about anything. If you tease him though...well you won't be on top for very long. The moment he loses control you'll be bent like a pretzel.

Xavier has more length than girth, and god damn is he able to use that to his advantage. If anything his dick is actually kind of pretty, with a few prominent veins on it and a soft pink tip. Now how he uses it...he will learn your body so well that he can perfectly angle himself inside of you and make you see stars. There is no saving you at that point.

Xavier can't say he has a favorite position when he's taking you. As long as he can be inside you in some way, shape, or form, he's content. If he had to choose though, he likes being in a spooning position with his cock buried into your heat, his hand on your hip and face in the crook of your neck while he whispers the filthiest things in your ear.

Despite having a larger sex drive than most would think, he doesn't masturbate as often. Anytime he's in the mood he might start, but if he doesn't have you with him it's not as exciting and he often times finds himself wanting to doze off. Only time he'll finish himself off in his own hand is if you're with him, or on call with him and he can hear you moaning as you touch yourself to the sound of his voice.

Xavier can and will send you spicy text messages while you're at work. He's a lot more careful with sending photos though since he'd hate it if you opened an image of him in public and had someone else see on accident. Not because he's ashamed of his body, but because he hates the thought of embarrassing you while you're working. He will, however, happily accept a spicy photo of you at any point in time. He even has a privacy screen on his phone so nobody can accidentally see it.

While Xavier is pretty kinky, he does have a few he is partial to. He likes cockwarming, especially after you two finish. If he had the choice he'd fall asleep with his length still deep inside of you. Another one would be somnophilia, as long as both parties consent to it of course. Xavier feels bad he's always sleeping, so if you ever wanted to use his body he'd be more than happy to let you. Not to mention it would make an amazing wake up call.

Zayne

Out of all three love interests, Zayne is the most tame when it comes to kinks. While he is happy enough to indulge you with whatever you want to try out, he is very much content with plain vanilla if that's what you request. Honestly whatever works out for the both of you is what he likes.

Now despite him being fine with vanilla sex, if you suggest trying something a bit more out there, he's probably all for it. Especially if you ask him to dominate you. He's already the top when it comes to sex, even if you're riding him he's holding your hips and controlling the tempo. If you ask for more Dom/Sub dynamics, he'll research it heavily before trying anything.

Zayne's dick is an absolute monster. Not only is it girthy, there's also quite a bit of length there as well and the veins lining the length only add to the sensations. It's the kind of dick that you have to whisper "Never back down, never give up". You won't be walking straight for days. It's the kind of cock that might put you in a wheelchair. It's a damn good thing he's a medical professional because his dick might actually destroy you, and yet you'll still be begging for more. Half the time he doesn't even put it in all the way so that you'll have a chance at being able to go to work the next day. And good luck sucking him off, not even a master could fit his entire dick down their throat.

Zayne's favorite position would have to be you riding him. He'll sit down on a couch with you on his lap, your chest right in front of him so he can nip and suck at it. His hands having an almost bruising grip on your hips as he guide you up and down on his length. Your small whimpers as he tells you how good you are for him. To Zayne, literally nothing can beat the view of you bouncing in his lap.

Zayne hates having to take matters into his own hands, literally, but sometimes if he doesn't have you with him he needs to do something. Memories of your nights together will be going through his head until he's painfully hard and can't sleep or work. He's not vocal when he masturbates unless he's on call with you, and even then it's small grunts here and there.

Zayne will avoid sending you pictures that are explicit. He might send more teasing photos to you every now and then, but nothing too bad. He's also careful about sending steamy messages. Normally if he does, it's to inform you of what's to come later in the day and it doesn't go too far. When you two are away from one another for long periods of time, he will video call you for some play time. Sometimes he'll even edge you, telling you not to cum until he gets home (which is torture for those business trips that last literal weeks).

Rafayel

As long as you're willing, Rafayel is more than happy to explore certain kinks with you. Of course only after you both look into it together. He loves teasing you about them while you two look into it, his body draped over your own while his hands explore your exposed skin, asking if you wanted to try the kink you're reading about right now.

He's a switch without a doubt. When he's bottoming he's nothing but a brat trying to be a power bottom and take control of the situation. When he's on top he is a huge tease, coaxing you into begging him for his touch. Either way, sex with Rafayel is always fun. Normally it's a small battle of dominance to decide who tops and bottoms.

Rafayel has more length than girth, and can definitely be called above average in that department. He isn't huge though, but just the right size to make you feel completely full. He also knows how to use it, making you whimper out his name as he slowly drags his length against your warm walls. His dick is pretty smooth as well, the veins not being very prominent. It is extremely sensitive to your touch though, and it's so easy to get him riled up just by running your hand over his pants.

To nobody's surprise, Rafayel likes to take you in the water. Whether it be in the pool, his tub, or the ocean. He has to admit you look amazing while the two of you are in the tub, your hands gripping the edges as you slowly ride him. His hands playing with all your exposed parts, teasing you and slowly bucking his hips into your own. Watching you cum and collapse onto his chest, panting his name as he continued fucking into you while you cling to him until he finishes, sometimes dragging another orgasm out of you.

Rafayel can and will masturbate to the thought of you whenever he has so much of a dirty thought. He's so down bad for you that he can't help himself. Just remembering how your skin feels against him, or how you whimper his name is enough to get him hard. He's not afraid to admit he's had to escape to the bathroom at one of his exhibits before just to get it out of his system. He can and will inform you about how it's all your fault and how you need to take responsibility.

Speaking of how you'll be informed if he masturbates, he will send you photos when it happens. His hand wrapped around his cock while in a closet during an event. Sometimes you'll see the cum dripping from the tip as he tells you n detail what you do to him. If he's at the studio, he'll call you up moaning your name, asking when you can come over. Of course this doesn't happen daily, but it is smart to make sure to have a privacy screen for your phone as well as headphones when you answer one of Rafayel's video calls if you're in public.

Lemurian Form

Rafayel is significantly more sensitive to touch in his Lemurian form. Feeling your hands tracing over his delicate scales will send shivers right down his spine.

He has two...and they're not small either. He has a slit in his tail that's softer than the rest and if you play with it enough, his cocks will come out. They're stacked, one on top of the other. The bottom one is about the side of his normal dick, but the top is significantly bigger.

They're tapered as well, coming to a soft point at the tips. The base of his cock has soft scales that are extremely sensitive (touching them the first time made him cum instantly). The rest of his length is a soft blue color that gradients to a more flesh tone at the top.

His cum is bioluminescent.

[cherryredstars]

parent!reader waking up one day, entering the kitchen and seeing dad!miguel taking care of their 6 month old baby while he fixes breakfast for the two of them because he didn’t want to wake them up so they could get some rest, and then just absolutely getting the worst baby fever known to man, because why wouldn’t you if that’s what you were waking up to every day 🤭🤭 that is all

(also thank you for all your hard work, you are single-handedly sustaining me and I need you to know that 🥹❤️)

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x gn!reader

Warnings: Fluff, Mentions of Wanting More Children

Summary: Early mornings with baby babbling and chocolate chips.

A/N: This request is so cutesy!!! Thank you for sending it in, love!!

Word Count: 930

Why is it so bright?

A deep groan leaves your lips as your eyes squint against the beam of sunlight coming through your window. You sigh deeply as you turn over, grumbling into your pillow and closing your eyes again. You can feel your body beginning to melt back into the mattress when you hear something clatter to the ground. On instinct, your arms push your body up as alarms start ringing in your head. Your head feels woozy from home quickly you moved, but your eyes are frantic as you look around the room. The nerve-endings firing throughout your body calm within the next second, the sound of watery baby laughter filling your room from outside. A smile forms on your face when hurried hushing follows, which only makes the laughter louder.

Slower this time, you push yourself up and out of bed. You shiver the moment your feet hit the cold wood flooring, letting out a breath. For a moment you debate on making the bed, but the sound of pans and baby clapping convinces you to save it for later. You walk towards the bedroom door, and the second you open it the smell of batter hits you. Your stomach growls in response, saliva gathering in your mouth as you open the door further and walk out and into the hallway. The further down you walk, the closer the sound of kitchen clutter and baby babbling becomes.

The moment you emerge from the hallway, you can feel the way your heart expands. You lean against the entrance, crossing your arms with a smile on your face as you take in the sight. Your baby girl babbles nonsense to her dad, kicking in her highchair with half-eaten mini chocolate chip pancakes on her tray. On the floor is a missed spot of syrup, and guessing by the discarded baby bowl on the counter, the noise from before was her playing around. Your husband stands at the stove, a mess of pancake batter, fruits, and chocolate on the counter besides him. You don't know why the man needs so many butter knives and bowls to make pancakes, but you let him do his thing since he's the one cleaning them. He responds to your baby with oh's and aw's, pouring batter into the pan and flipping it with a spatula after a few minutes.

You're content to watch the scene forever, but your baby has other plans. Sensing your presence, your baby turns to you, her already there smile growing larger at the sight of you. Her hands slap down on her tray in excitement, happy babbles leaving her. You can't help but laugh, making your way over to her and picking her up the moment she makes grabby hands at you. Her hands are slightly sticky from syrup, but you've grown used to it, already knowing you'll be showering later. Her hands come to your face, cupping each of your cheeks as she gives you a smile. You smile back, giving her a surprised face before laughing at her elated reaction.

Her eyes shift slightly away from your face, moving to something behind you. It's the only warning you get before large arms wrap around your waist. Messy curls brush against your chin as warm breath fans your neck. A soft kiss is placed on your skin and pleasant shivers run up your spine. You turn your head and smile at the sight of Miguel.

"Hey, handsome," you greet, adjusting your baby on your hip so you can run a hand through Miguel's hair. He hums against your skin, placing one last kiss before pulling his head away from your neck.

"We didn't wake you, did we?" He asks softly, his arms unraveling around your waist until his hands are planted on your hips. You shake your head, turning back to your daughter and blowing a raspberry against her cheek. She lights up at the action, babbling and trying to replicate the noise. It causes both you and Miguel to chuckle, and you melt into his chest.

Miguel has a large smile on his face when you turn to him, love clearly shining in his eyes. When he looks down at you, that look on his face softens. He leans down and you smile against his lips when he kisses you. Even after having a kid together and being in a relationship with him for so long, you can feel the butterflies pinging against the lining of your stomach.

"Thank you for making breakfast."

Miguel smiles back, shrugging. He reaches his arm out, taking hold of the corner of your darling girl's bib and wiping away a bit of drool running from her mouth. "Anything for the two of you."

You don't think your heart has ever been more full. You turn to him, opening your mouth to say something when you pause. Your brows furrow as you sniff the air. "I think... your pancakes are burning."

Miguel eyes widen and he curses, ignoring your scandalized gasp and reminder that the baby is present as he rushes to the stove. Your baby simply laughs at her father, clapping her hands. You can't help but join in, shaking your head as you watch Miguel scrape burnt pancake batter off the bottom of the pan. He throws you both a playful glare, sticking his tongue out for his daughter's amusement.

As you take in the scene, you can't help but think that you wouldn't mind expanding your little family. Maybe your heart has a little room left to be filled.

[thexsilentxwordsmith]

Pussydrunk!Simon "Ghost" Riley x Cockdrunk!Fem!Reader

Fandom: Call of Duty

Character(s): Simon Riley, Reader

Summary: Simon comes home from deployment, hungry to have his pretty girl all to himself. Things get heated quick and before long you are both drunk off the feeling of the other. From this ask here.

Word Count: 5.4 k

Warnings:

The moment those heavy boots hit the threshold of the apartment, brown eyes are searching for you as Simon’s heart pounds in his ears the same as it had the entire drive over. He’s been gnawing at the bit since even before he returned to base a day ago, aching to get back to the gorgeous being living in his flat. The last month of his deployment he’s been on edge, counting down the days in agonizing fashion as the craving growing in the pit of his stomach gets worse and worse. Fuck, he’s missing you - all of you - something fierce. 

Simon has missed those sweet moans of yours, the way you make his name sound so perfect through the stuttered gasps as you reach that level of incoherence that renders you completely useless; he has missed all the ways your body moves against and underneath him, writhing and back arching as his larger form overwhelms you; he has missed the way you fuck him, body begging for more even as you struggle to fit him all in and how beautiful it is to be inside you. 

It is enough to drive the man insane.

From the bedroom you can hear the door opening and closing and rush to the living room as quick as your legs can move, carried by giddy nerves to see your lover again after so long. You knew he was meant to be in today, but not the time and so you’ve been on edge waiting and listening; as soon as you see him a deepening ache situates itself in your chest. 

Simon clocks you as you come into the living room and he can’t find enough air to fill his lungs; by the way your cheeks instantly glow with warmth and your eyes sparkle he’s sure you are feeling the same tension fill the air around you the moment you two are in sight of one another. You are the one to close the distance as Simon’s limbs feel too heavy to move at first, blood being drawn to other places along his body that need it more now that he is near to the object of his desire. 

“Hey there stranger,” you smile up into those familiar balaclava- clad features as your heartbeat steadily becomes more erratic from your body flooding with that desperate longing to be against him once again. It is always the same: when you two are apart for long periods when he has to be away the moment you are in front of one another again it is like striking a match in a room filled with gasoline. “Long time no see.” 

He stares back down at you, light chocolate eyes taking in the face he hasn’t seen properly in too damn long. “Well ‘ello there yerself, pretty girl,” he returns, gravely tone sending chills down your spine as he drops the gear on his shoulder to the floor so that he has free range of motion to cup his calloused hand along your soft, delicate cheek. “It’s been a hot fuckin’ minute. Did ya miss me, luv?”

Before his brain can register what’s happening he senses something brush up against him in the small space still between your bodies and as his eyes travel down he sees that your hand is grabbing at his belt buckle, silky digits lacing themselves around the metal clasp. His eyes jump back up to yours instantly.

You aren’t wasting any time, are you? Fucking hell.

“Missed you a whole fucking lot, Simon,” you say under your breath as you give his belt a firm tug forward so that he has to take a step into you. Your thighs are already being rubbed together where you stand; it’s instant the way he can turn you on just by his presence alone. “Didn’t know when you’d be in; been waiting as patiently as I could, but I gotta say it hasn’t been easy. Got my nerves all flustered. How about you? Are you flustered, baby?”

You just have to do it, don’t you? That one damned gesture that always sends him reeling.

It isn’t a secret how the time apart makes him pine for you as if he is a man dying of thirst: for those hot, breathless moments spent between your thighs, for the way your bodies seem created only for the other, for the intense sensations of euphoria that only you can give him. So when your fingers hook into his belt to pull him in closer, you know what effect it will have on making him crumble, don’t you? 

Eight months is far too fucking long not to have any piece of you and any little touch would have done the trick to do him in, but you know the exact combination that will have him throwing you on your back in a heartbeat. He is a man starved of his addiction and it’s about goddamn time he had another hit. As you tug at the leather with a smirk across your lips, doe-eyed stare not so innocent anymore, all that yearning that had been bubbling right under the calm surface of those autumn-colored eyes for eight long, agonizing months explodes with force. 

No words, not a goddamn sound as that skull mask is ripped up off of Simon’s face in a flash quicker than your eyes can catch. Your body is moved by two strong arms more than capable of manhandling those curves with ease and find yourself slammed into the wall while he clasps your chin securely in his grip so that hungry lips can scramble to aggressively capture your own. While your lips dance, his free hand roams up under your clothes to grab ahold of any piece of available flesh as all that pent up desire surges through his veins like liquid fire. His fingertips tremble as they brush across all that soft, balmy skin along your abdomen and around your hips, making him produce a guttural moan into your open mouth that you are forced to swallow down. 

That huge, hulking body of his with its prominent muscles bulging everywhere even through his clothing overwhelms your own as he pins you harder against the wall while his grip descends to around your ass so that he can bring your hips forward, clothed pelvis rutting into you to catch any extra bit of friction he can as that tenting at the crotch of his pants swells the longer he grinds against you. His mouth is insatiable, stealing sloppy, frantic kisses one after another until your lips burn from the abrasion… and yet you still aren’t satisfied. 

Simon feels your nipples through your t-shirt stiffening as his chest rubs against them, a reminder to his numbing brain that there is even more of a feast for him waiting just beneath your clothes if he can just get them off you; the couple of nudes he keeps in his phone that you send him while he’s away are only a pale comparison to the real fucking thing and he’s been dying see it in person.

You’re close to one another, but not fucking close enough. 

He needs skin on skin, curves molded into curves, cock buried in you deep. That’s the crux of it all - he needs to be reminded of what you feel like wrapped around him, lose his mind as your cunt gives him the sensation he can get nowhere else from no one else. It consumes him in that moment until his thoughts are filled with nothing but the oncoming ecstasy that will soon be his. 

Feverish fingers slip themselves into the waistband at the back of your pants as he continues to rut against you, the few layers of fabric between you about to be reduced as he shoves down taking your pants over the arch of your ass until they fall around your ankles and you can step out of them. Your own fingers are already undoing the buckle of his belt before your clothes can hit the floor; thank fuck that Simon likes to keep his wardrobe uncomplicated when on leave. 

“Christ, I’m so fuckin’ hard for ya, sweetheart,” he breathes the heated, desperate words against your raw lips as hips continue to grind on you and make your work that much more difficult, “it’s been hell being away for so long. I’ve been fuckin’ starved, baby. That sweet little pussy of yours is callin’ my fuckin’ name. I need it, I need ya…fuckin’ can’t wait another goddamn second.” 

The muscles along his abdomen tense through his shirt as you brush against them until finally his belt comes loose and you can move onto the button securing his pants. You finish undoing everything just in time for him to tear that fucking shirt clean off your top half before doing exactly the same to his own. 

The middle of his chest is flushed pink and hastily you lean in to press your lips to it, through the tingle against your mouth from tiny hairs brushing over the delicate skin you can feel he is so warm it’s like he’s heated from the inside out. That broad chest heaves up and down heavily with the weight of his lust-filled breaths as you dot tender pecks along the center before he can’t take anymore and picks you up, throws you over his shoulder, and hurriedly drags you off to the bedroom hungry and ready to indulge.  

“That’s it,” Simon says in that brash tone that lets you know he’s reached his limit. “Can’t take this ache ‘nother goddamn second. You and that sweet thing between your legs are mine now.”  

He’s able to make it across the apartment in no time and throws open the bedroom door so that it hits the wall behind it with a booming thud as he stalks to the bed and sets you down on the surface, making sure to remove the pants hanging loosely around his hips as quick as he can along with his boxers. The moment he’s free of the clothing binding him that thick, meaty appendage springs to life, bobbing at attention as the vein along it pulses, and your breath hitches as your eyes are drawn to it; he’s not the only one who’s hungry and its been a hot fucking minute since you’ve laid eyes on all he has to offer.

You barely have time to scramble up towards the pillows at the head of the bed before he is crawling up towards you, a predator’s gaze making his iris’ flash and sparkle with an internal fire in the scant bit of light from the bedside lamp that illuminates the room. 

Simon’s shoulder muscles tense as he moves on all fours until he’s over you, his cock dangling down as he gets between your legs so that it drags over the petals of your pussy. You can feel it throb as it becomes even more engorged with blood at the stimulation and it makes your mouth salivate. A strained grunt echoes through his closed lips as the tip grazes over that silky, heated skin between your thighs; he’s already vibrating with pleasure… what the fuck is gonna happen when he gets inside?

Only one way to find out…

Simon pulls your legs up high around his waist, wide torso keeping you nice and spread for him. You claw at his shoulder blades with your nails as you shove your hips into him, body practically begging for him to get inside already. Screw any foreplay, you can’t afford to wait and let this frantic moment slip by. There is only one thing you want in you and it is already throbbing at its destination. 

“Fuck, please Simon, just get inside me,” your plea sends a shiver down his spine. “I don’t want to fucking wait…waited long enough.”

Spitting into his hand he applies the moisture to your entrance, lubricating the opening with hard presses of his fingertips along your cunt to help get things moving in the right direction. “Been a while, baby,” he returns as he aligns the tip and presses it against you while trying not to fall apart at the seams, “ya sure ya can still fuckin’ take it all?”

You nod aggressively, the need to be filled out by him overwhelming your every sense. You’ve waited patiently all this time, chomping at the bit for him to get back to you and now that he is here between your legs it’s all you can think about. “Give it to me,” you demand. “I need it baby, please, I’m aching something terrible. I need to feel you inside me again.”

How could he ever deny a request like that from you? 

The world falls away as the tip slips through the threshold of your body and inside and he has to stop as just the head alone stretching you wide sends him spiraling. Your back arches off of the bed as you squirm under him, mouth falling open with half-formed moans that get caught in the back of your throat as the tight space is beginning to fill. Simon shudders with ecstasy, sucking his bottom lip in between his teeth to bite down in hopes that the sharp pain will force him to stay sane.  

Another thrust shoves him in a bit more so that now he’s more than halfway there, but still has just a bit to go. Your body doesn’t stand a chance as you lay under him at his mercy. His fingernails graze your waist as his hands hold on tight; he has to fit it in, get to the base, completely surround himself within you. Taking a deep breath he gathers another burst of energy to thrust all the way until he bottoms out and you release a cry into the silence of the room. 

“Goddamn ya feel so fuckin’ good princess, like a goddamn dream,” he gasps out as his head snaps down against your chest. “Pretty girl, my pretty fuckin’ girl, wanna keep ya fuckin’ full ‘a me all the time.”

Simon’s brain is quickly becoming mush as the warmness and growing wetness of your pussy makes his large form quiver at the bliss. You are no better, sanity slipping away as his hefty cock practically molds your walls to his specific shape as it rests inside. Hips begin to rock and are immediately punctuated by a deep-throated groan with each snap as he settles into a steady rhythm.   

Thrust after thrust each one harder than the last pushes your body until it is shoved up and your head hits the wall behind the bed. Simon’s nose nuzzles into your neck as feeble whimpers leave the confines of your mouth and pack his head full. “Missed your sounds too,” he says, amidst another thrust. “Keep this up and it’s gonna be my fuckin’ end, sweetheart.” Another strong thrust follows and then another.  

A yearning need to see himself fuck your gorgeous body suddenly engulfs his mind and so he slow sits himself up on his knees, making sure to keep himself inside you, so that he can get the perfect birdseye view of the beautiful way your body takes him in. It’s perfection and he cannot help but become absorbed in watching as each thrust in and out makes his cock disappear inside that narrow passage only to slip back out covered in more of your juices with each pass. 

Over and over his hips rock into you, the muscles along his abdomen clenching, fingertips digging into your sides to hold you still as his speed steadily increases the longer he goes. Your music fills his head, whimpers of pleasure as he strikes against your g-spot from the angle he’s positioned in, and that is the only thing that is floating in there now as everything else becomes a blur. 

The stoic and collected military officer is reduced to a glorious mess the longer he thrusts, drooling over you, going blind and delirious at the feeling of those tight, silky walls sucking him all in as they flutter around his cock. It’s been too long, too many nights spent alone without your company stuck half-way across the world with only his hand to keep him occupied when he can get a free moment, which those were few and far between. But nothing, nothing ever could compare to the feeling of you.

“Can’t get enough,” he stammers with a groan, so wrapped up in the moment that speech is near impossible to produce. “Fuckin’ desperate for ya, need more…need fuckin’ more…”

Simon is deep inside you and yet that ache is still monstrous, eating him alive so that anything outside of the ecstasy of your flesh is just fucking gone. He can’t think, he can’t breathe, he’s obsessed with your body. It isn’t enough though, never enough. You have completely consumed him; he is under your spell and nothing can break the charm.

His head is spinning, thoughts vacant like he is wasted; fuck, he’s high off the sensation of your pussy clenching around him. Now that he is inside you, there is no way he can leave anytime soon. There’s no goddamn way he’s going to let either of you come yet, not after how long you two have gone without each other. 

That hot coil tensing in the pit of his stomach pulls tighter and tighter, but he will not let it snap… not yet. No, he needs this to last as long as he physically can keep it up and so he knows what he has to do and with all his strength he does it; that once intense pounding slows down until he stops amongst your whimpered mewling. 

“What’re you doing?” you stutter, hips desperately trying to buck against him, but he pins them down for a bit. 

“Uh, uh,” he shakes his head, “don’t ya fuckin’ dare think you’re gonna come yet. Ya feel too fuckin’ good to let go of.”

Oh shit… You were in for it now, but just how much you could have never guessed. 

“No…no, please… I need you to keep going,” you plead as your throat strains to release the words, water rimming the whites of your eyes. That consuming ache is so deep in your bones it threatens to devour you whole, causing you to rip at the very seams as it permeates every fiber of your being until your entire form is primed like an explosive ready to combust. You can’t breathe, you can’t fucking think; everything is focused on how much the feeling of him is consuming all of you like a fire burning through dry tinder.

A shuddering breath escapes his lips; even stopping doesn’t help much, your body just feels too good and so he has to at least rut carefully against it. “I know, baby, I know,” he groans as his fingers dig into your hip to now force you to grind your clit into the base of his shaft. “But ya want this to fuckin’ last, yeah? Ya don’t wanna be done with me just yet, do ya?”

That thick, veiny appendage lay inside you, its girth stretching out the walls of your cunt to capacity as it simply rests there throbbing with the beat of his rapid heart rate, stewing in the filthy mess of juices he’s already made between your legs. You choke on a whimper as the stimulation to your clit sends a shockwave through to your toes and you clench them together, gathering some of the sheets into their grip. 

“No,” you shake your head wildly. “You just feel so fucking good, I can’t help it… feels so good… I just wanna keep feeling good with you, Simon.”

“I know, sweet girl,” he praises as he leans forward and presses his burning lips to the skin on your stomach, knowing that no matter what you would have said he wasn’t going to let you tap out yet; he needs your pussy like he needs air to survive. “It’s been too fuckin’ long since we’ve been able ta do this…need ta make up for all the lost time.” 

Simon’s dreamt about this the entire time you’ve been apart; insatiable, desperate, carnal fantasies about fucking your tight hole to within an inch of your sanity, making you come so hard that you can’t move for hours after. His cock has been throbbing for months with nothing but his fucking hand to take the edge off as he pictures filling out every inch of your hole until there is nowhere left for his cock to go.

Another couple of minutes of simply breathing, grinding, and focusing on the way the skin of your torso is so soft against his lips and he’s far enough from that ledge that he wants to start thrusting full force again. He leans down and wraps his arms around your body and you take it as a sign that he’s going to start up again, only for him to roll you both until you are the one on top now. The movement is unexpected, but you are more than willing to go along with it if it means you can take control of your own pleasure. 

As he situates himself under you, his hands roam up and down your sides while he takes a second to enjoy how you look perched over him: full tits directly in his face, hair cascading around your cheeks as you peer down into his face, eyes rolling back in your head every time a sensitive point gets stimulated. You are his fucking fantasy when you get on top. 

“I wanna have ya ride me for a bit,” he breathes. “Show me how good ya ride it, pretty girl. Make my cock your toy.”

As long as he stays inside you, you’ll do whatever the hell he wants.    

Placing your hands on his hard chest for support while his hand moves back to your hips, Simon guides you up and down until you are bouncing in rhythm to match his racing heartbeat. Harder and harder he shoves you forcefully down to get as deep into you as possible until you can feel bruises rising where his hands have a hold of you, yet that doesn’t matter at all as you can only comprehend the way his cock is rendering you too fucking dumb to think of anything else.  

Pushing down against his chest you bob up and down on your knees as best as you can, trying to keep up with his relentless pace. He told you to use him, but all you want is for him to make you his living fleshlight as you are forced to take it all. Your movements start to get sloppy after a time as you can hardly keep yourself focused anymore with how good it feels and Simon takes notice, though he is ready with the solution.

His hips start to strike up into your pussy as even though he is beneath you he is more than capable of taking control, not wanting to move into a new position just yet. You whimper and whine with your mouth hung open as each percussive hit sends shockwaves of euphoria ripping through you just like you want. This is too much for anyone to handle: you being entirely ravaged by him until you are so desperately lost in the pleasure of it all that you are in a complete state of full body bliss. 

You can only sit and take every last delectable inch that he gives you as his massive girth stretches your walls with every thrust of his pelvis upward. The room fills with the wet, sticky music of your bodies slapping against each other as he works your hole as if this is the last chance he will ever get to fuck you and he needs to make it count.

Minute after minute, his full attention being focused solely on you, each stroke along that incredibly sensitive bundle of nerves inside your core drives you increasingly closer to that razor’s edge and threatens to violently throw you off at any point without notice. He must be feeling it too, for again his thrusting slows until he is simply grinding against you once again and that building pressure falls away. 

Over and over again this happens, Simon edging you both closer and closer before struggling to back off and changing positions in a constant rotation, each position just as mind-numbing as the last now that you are cockdrunk. You find yourself on your knees with your head shoved into the mattress  and then on your side with him pressed up against your back, bouncing on top with his hand desperately cupping at your tits and then returning to where it all started on your back, all the while the constant humping during the calmer moments keeps you primed and yet just far enough off the edge that each new round keeps building towards that desperate end. 

Goddamn his stamina is something of legend, but when he wants something bad enough he will make it work no matter how hard he must push himself. And right now he cannot get enough of you no matter how he tries. 

Fuck, your clit is throbbing so hard you think you might pass out, the room so warm your hair sticks to the sides of your face, the scent of sex pungent with each ragged breath shared between your close mouths; every single sense overstimulated to the point of barely being able to process it all. You are perched on his lap with your arms wrapped around his neck, foreheads pressed together tight with eyes shut. 

Simon leans in to kiss your raw mouth, but even the contact from your lips makes him gasp from the sensitivity. Your legs are shaking violently now as he’s slowed once more, every muscle pushed to its limit as he rocks his hips into you just because it feels too good to ever stop completely. Both of you are sparkling from head to toe, coated with the speckled dew of perspiration to match the absolute mess Simon has made between your legs. 

Smooth thighs glisten with that warm, moist, natural lubrication of your cunt as it dribbles out of you and onto the sheets beneath to leave a noticeable dark spot on the bed that’s still warm to the touch. Simon’s mouth waters as the taste buds along his tongue prick to life at the sight, begging to savor all your sweet nectar, but he tells himself to not get ahead of things. 

The rest of the night you are going to be his and he will get everything he wants of it all before the end.

Just like you, Simon is out of his goddamn mind with pleasure. The sensation consumes everything inside him until there is nothing left; the only way he can communicate is through breathy groans and staggered grunts as if he is only an animal now. He craves to be the blood in your veins, the air in your lungs, the only goddamn thing you need. And that is when he knows that he cannot hold off another second. 

Without warning he pulls out of you only briefly so that he can aggressively flip you over onto your back, getting into position by kneeling in front of you as he throws your legs onto his broad, sculpted shoulders before he grips your hips and instantly re-enters you. This is it, though he can’t barely speak, it’s gonna happen whether he is ready or not so he is going to be damned sure to make it go off with a fucking bang.

Again Simon picks up his desperate pace, his abs dripping with sweat as they contract and release after each desperate thrust. Those brown eyes close off to the rest of the world, just absorbing every last second of that mind-numbing goodness that he can before he blows.

“F-fuck, Simon...mmmm…” you whine your plea as you can feel that warmth rising harshly in the pit of your stomach, “p-please… d-d-don’t stop.”

Your mind is all static, so lost on Simon’s cock that you cannot stand it; it’s overwhelming in its intensity that you actually aren’t entirely sure you want to come yet. If you could just stay suspended in this moment forever, you’d die happy. All that edging has done its job just as intended though and with a few more strong thrusts of him deep in your core, that is it: like a hot flash of white light you squeal out in unsteady whimpers as your orgasm rips through you with such force you nearly bolt off the bed as your back arches and your hips buck harshly against him. 

A roar is released from within his chest, his body writhing as he holds on to your waist for dear life while he milks his cock inside you, coating your walls in his cum until he has no more left in him to give. He sounds like a wild animal and it makes your body vibrate with exhilaration; you are the one to make him come with such force he is reduced to more basic instincts. 

You fall back against the bed as your body shakes violently with the force of your orgasm. Never has such intense pleasure overwhelmed you so thoroughly that your limbs tremble uncontrollably before and though the exhaustion overtakes you, it is euphoric. Simon slowly slips himself out of your pussy as he sits back, his overstimulated cock twitching with sensitivity as he removes it from your tightness.

You whimper a little, instantly missing the feeling of him stretching you out and honestly wishing he would have just stayed inside even longer, but you know if you don’t have even a small break that you are not going to survive.

His strong hands hold your vibrating legs apart as he sits back on the mattress exhausted and a million miles away as he watches as his cum dribbles out of your pussy like honey; goddamn did he stuff you to the brim. All you can do is lay there with your eyes shut tight, heart thudding against your ribs as you focus all your remaining brain power on breathing. From your head to the tips of your toes you sparkle with perspiration as if you are decked out in diamonds that shimmer in the low light of the room.

“Christ Simon…gonna kill me,” you chuckle lightly as your mouth finally is able to do something other than hang open. 

Eyes still closed, the sensation of his lips brushing against your inner thigh catches your attention. “Not…yet,” his low, gruff voice hits your ears from between your legs, accent heavy with his fatigue. Why did that sound like a promise?

Your mouth is already forming the question when it instantly dies on your tongue as you become aware of a firm grip from those strong hands spreading your legs open even further as his body slides off the edge of the mattress and onto the floor to sit on his knees with his face at optimal level with your pussy.

“Simon?” you ask hastily as you struggle up to your elbow to see those dark eyes peer up at you just over the mound of your sex. 

The corner of his mouth is barely visible, but you can see it upturn. He may have come, but he is nowhere near finished yet. “Still fuckin’ hungry for ya,” he growls before descending down into the ecstasy of the space in between your thighs. 

Simon just needs to buy time until he can get it up again…good thing his tongue is always ready to go. Sharp features are instantly soaked as he dives in without hesitation, the scent of your arousal instantly clinging to his cheeks and making his cock begin to twitch. His mouth is filled with a combination of both of your flavors as his tongue does what it does best: find your clit like a pleasure-seeking missile. He is ready to get completely lost in you all over again, this time with his first favorite activity and all you can do is hold on as he straps you to his face.

Let the feast on your pussy continue…it’s gonna be a long fucking while until he’s done with you.

Tagging: @llelannie @thicksexxualtension @cheolsblkwife @cum-tea-and-towels @sillylittlereader @mesyakee