#and then flo arrives and i'm like Oh

[violet-jessop]

insane that once a month i lose my mind alongside my uterus' lining

[obessedwithfictionalmen]

Co-Stars pt.15

Callum Turner X Actress! Reader

Summary: Y/n is invited of cooking with Flo and gets a little drunk.

Warning: Kinda cringe (I'm sorry)/ alcohol/ Swearing/ use of Y/n/

Word count: 790 words

Florence Pugh invited her on her cooking show. She was excited to go with her, she loved to cook, and she was friends with Flo. She brought Callum with her, and Callum brought Austin. When she arrived, she hugged Florence and took the apron that she gave her. It was a white one with pomegranate all over it. ‘’I’m so excited!’’ she squeals. Y/n chuckles and kiss Callum before Florence goes live.

‘’It’s cooking with Flo, bitches!’’ she puts the knife in the cutting board. ‘’And Y/n is here!’’ Flo exclaims, hugging her again. ‘’Hey everyone! How’s everyone doing?’’ they look in the chat for the answers and then, they look at each other before laughing for no reason. ‘’Guys, today we’re going to do chicken Cajun alfredo, or whatever the order is. But for the drink, I made Y/n’s favorite, a rum n’ coke!’’ she gives her the glass and they tap their glass together before starting to pace around the kitchen to get the ingredients. ‘’By the way, if you hear people talking behind, it’s my husband and my husband’s husband’’ Y/n laughs. Austin, Callum and Florence burst out laughing, Y/n is proud of her joke, as she joins the group laughing.

‘’So now the chicken is seasoned – ‘’ Y/n impulsive thought took control as she slapped the chicken, like she would slap someone’s ass. ‘’- Mate, what the fuck’’ Florence’s smoker laugh took over her laugh, which made Y/n laugh even more. ‘’How many drinks did they have?’’ Austin asked, chuckling. ‘’I don’t know’’ Callum laughed. Y/n was out of breath from laughing so much. ‘’Okay, where were we?’’ she laughed again. Florence took a sip of her drink before looking at her friend. ‘’We have to cook the chicken’’ she explained. ‘’Oh, we should put music!’’ Y/n suggested. Florence nodded before she hit shuffle on her playlist, the first song that came to their ear was Vente Pa’ Ca by Ricky Martin ft Maluma. ‘’I love that song!’’ Y/n exclaimed as she took Florence hands to dance. ‘’The chicken is going to burn, love’’ Callum warned. As Y/n lip synced, Florence quickly took care of the piece of meat.

The pasta was almost done, so was the chicken, Florence and Y/n had about 3 drinks, Austin and Callum’s cheeks were hurting from laughing so much; Y/n was unhinged. Every thought that went through her head, she shared it. ‘’I think I would’ve been burned alive if I lived in Salem when the trial happened, because I have great tits and an opinion.’’ She said, touching the side of her tits, laughing. ‘’I’m hot, they want to make me hotter’’ she giggled. Florence face palmed as she stirred the pastas. ‘’I think you had enough to drink’’ Callum laughed. Y/n nods in agreeing with him. ‘’We’re going to take a little bit of pasta water before dumping it. That’s the secret, pasta water!’’ Y/n exclaims as she takes a scoop of the pasta water. ‘’Someone in the chat said that Callum and Austin are the parents and we’re the children’’ Florence laughs.

‘’Ok! It’s done! Look at how pretty it is!’’ Y/n says as she shows the plate to the camera. ‘’Austin, Callum, come and taste!’’ Florence says. The boys come behind the girls, Callum puts his hands on Y/n’s waist, making her giggle. ‘’That smells amazing!’’ Austin comments. ‘’Yeah, it does!’’ Callum adds. As they take a bite of the food, Y/n and Florence looks at each other. ‘’It’s so fucking good!’’ Y/n exclaims. Florence nods and chuckles. ‘’Babe, you need to come on the show more often’’ Florence says. ‘’I’ll gladly come back’’ Y/n smiles. Austin and Callum take a bite at the food and smile. ‘’That is Gordon Ramsey level’’ Austin exclaims. ‘’It’s really good, oh my! I love it’’ he smiles.

‘’Okay guys, so that was cooking with Flo and Y/n, bitches! See you next time!’’ Florence says as she stops her live. ‘’That was really fun! Thank you so much for the invite’’ Y/n hugs Flo. ‘’You’re welcome here any time. Maybe with less drinks’’ She laughs. Callum agrees as he puts his arm around Y/n’s waist. ‘’Ouh! Next time we can cook shrimp tacos!’’ Y/n proposed. Florence nods as she says goodbye to Austin.

The aftermath of the video on the internet is good. People are saying that Drunk Y/n is unhinged, the fact that Y/n called Austin her husband’s husband is funny, Florence needs to invite Y/n again, Callum’s love contact is physical touch and many more stuff. Y/n was a little bit embarrassed about things she said, but overall she had a really great time, and she wanted to do it again…

[blackjackkent]

Prompt fill for @astreamofstars from this ask for this prompt meme. Karlach - "It is my fault, I think, that you have forgotten to fear me."

-----

“Oy, who’s the glowy bitch by the door, then?”

Karlach knows better than to bother looking up when the fresh-meat greataxe grunt starts talking, down the barracks a ways. This shit isn’t new. They always like to talk, the new arrivals to Zariel's army. And as soon as they see Karlach, no other topic will do.

Fair play enough, after all; she does kinda stick out. There's nobody else like her in the platoon, or in the whole army. In the eight years she’s been here, nobody else has ever gotten the tin can stuck into them and survived. She’s special, as Zariel likes to assure her, though special has never bought her anything but more blood and death - and the attention of every ignot who want to pick a fight.

Today’s mouthy prick is a draegloth, which explains why he’s talking a big game. A dogskull’s almost as unique as Karlach is around here; makes sense he’d pick out a target fast before anyone can pick him out for an asskicking.

“Oh, that? That's Cliffgate,” says another voice. This one Karlach recognizes - Namtar, a cambion, one of the platoon sergeants. He and Karlach have butted heads before, because Namtar is a rotten pissant. “Zariel's little kiss-ass. No heart, just an infernal engine in her chest.”

"No way," the draegloth says. "That's the Demonsbane? A ruttin' tief? Not even hellsborn?" He laughs sharply. "Lettin' in all sorts these days, uh?"

Karlach ignores the mocking words, focusing on choking down the tasteless morsels that pass for rations around here. The bunk across from her creaks unhappily as weight hits it.

“They're talkin’ about you, Dart,” Flo says with a nasty grin, settling onto the bed and lounging back against the wall. “Gonna sit here and take it?”

Karlach sighs. She picked up the nickname around her second week in the Hells, and it's never once been meant with kindness. Even Flo says it with a nasty edge, and Flo is the closest thing she has to a friend.

Good reminder, I guess, that no one here really gives a fuck about me, no matter how much I might like to pretend. Even after eight years, she can sometimes, if she squints, convince herself that there's camaraderie here, like there was in Gortash's old crew before he sold her out. But it's vain hope, a desperate attempt to pretend this place isn't rotting her fro the inside out; the illusion never lasts long and always just leaves her feeling lonelier.

"If it's not them, it'll be somebody else," she says noncommittally. "Lemme eat my dinner in peace."

"Nawww..." Flo says, comfortably dismissive. "C'mon, Dart, give us a show. Been too long since we had a proper scrap in here besides the piece in your chest."

Karlach laughs softly in spite of herself. It's a pretty weak pun, but the jokes in Avernus are as bad as the food. "I'm wore out, Flo," she says, shaking her head. "Leave off."

She looks up to find Flo's smile has turned a shade more brittle. "C'mon, now, Dart," she says, and there's a warning note in it now. "Y'know I can't be seen bein' friends with a softy. Give us a show, I said."

The message is loud and clear, as it always is. My friendship is conditional. And you'll do as I say, 'cos you *don't* want to be my enemy. Now dance.

Karlach huffs out a weary, flame-hot breath and tosses aside the last bit of her ration pack uneaten. With a groan, she pushes herself to her feet and strides down the barracks corridor towards Namtar and the draegloth.

"Hey, there she is." Namtar looks up with a lazy grin as she approaches. He's flopped on his bunk with his boots off, his wings furled neatly under him and feet up on a stack of equipment piled at the foot of the bed. "How's tricks, Dart?" Before Karlach can respond, he shoots a conspiratorial glance at the young dogskull. "Y'know why we call her Dart, Markos?"

The draegloth -- Markos -- looks puzzled. "Why?" he asks.

"Dumb-Ass Rusty Toaster." Namtar brays with laughter so hard it shakes the bed a little. "Fits, too, cos all she's good for is throwing at things t' poke holes in them."

Markos snickers loudly. Several more of the platoon have picked up on the conversation; smelling blood in the water, they've started to circle up, leaned casually against the walls or peering over the edge of their bunks. Some of them are grinning, enjoying watching the Demonsbane get a dunking. Others - the smart ones - are eyeing Karlach warily. She hasn't said anything yet, but her eyes are smoldering. In spite of herself, the rage is building. 

She doesn't want to fight them. She never has. She's always been loyal, and even in this bitch of a place, even under Zariel's thumb, she'd have fought hard for anyone here who wanted to fight for her in return. But that's never made the slightest bit of difference, because everyone here is a fucking tosser.

Hells. Maybe, when you come right down to it, so am I.

And that, really, is what enrages her, far more than these empty little insults.

"Y'know," she says slowly, looking the draegloth up and down. "I expect this sort of crap from the fresh meat. A mouth spewing shit 'cos you haven't learned to shut the fuck up yet. But you--" She turns her gaze slowly and deliberately to the sergeant. "Eight years it's been, Namtar, and neither of us dead yet, so you'd think you'd have figured out not to mess with me." She lets a slow, feral grin curl across her lips, and there's a ripple of anticipatory mumbling from the gathering crowd around them. "My fault, I guess, that you've forgotten to be scared of me. But I can fix that."

She moves suddenly, with no windup, her fists and feet all shifting at once. Her left fist crashes into Markos's jaw, knocking him back into the steel frame of the bed behind him; his skull ricochets off it with a metallic whingggg as his skull ricochets off the metal. With her left foot, she kicks behind his knee while he's unbalanced and fully flips him sideways. As he bounces back from the bedframe, he goes careening onto his front, his nose crunching into the stone floor.

Meanwhile, her other hand grabs Namtar by the collar and drags him out of his bunk. He has almost two inches on her, but she lifts him with ease one-armed, the engine roaring in her chest and sending energy coursing through her bicep. Spinning out of the kick at Markos, she slams Namtar into the wall, then releases her grip for a split second, only to refix it tightly around his throat before he can fall.

All of the cambion's bravado has vanished. His eyes are wide and brilliant white in the dark red of his face and he squirms ineffectually against Karlach's implacable grip. His wings, crunched between his back and the wall, struggle feebly. "Oy! Let me go!" he bleats, gripping her hand with both of his and trying to pull it away.

She glares at him. "Maybe. If you want to grovel a bit. Otherwise I'll finally just kill you. Maybe everyone else would finally get it through their thick skulls that you don't mess with me."

He sneers in an attempt at disdain, though it's considerably weakened by the fact that he's now struggling to breathe. "You wouldn't dare."

She laughs humorlessly and leans forward until her nose is nearly touching his, so he can feel the heat radiating off her body and see nothing but the exhausted fury in her eyes. "That really a chance you wanna take, sergeant?"

He hesitates, balanced between his anger and his fear. But something he sees in her eyes must convince him, because the fear wins. "Sorry," he mutters.

"What was that?" she asks coolly. "Didn't hear you."

"I'm sorry," he snaps. "Now let me go."

She could drag it out further, but the whole situation feels sticky as hot tar on her skin, burning down into her bones. Gods, I hate this. I hate all of it. I don’t want to be this thing they’ve made me, but I don’t know how to stop.

She releases his throat with a jerk, letting him slide down the wall to the floor, where he sits clutching at his neck and wheezing. Markos, nearby, is out cold where he hit the floor.

"Good," she mutters. "Just... stay there and shut the fuck up." She doesn't wait to hear what the other gathered soldiers might have to say, but turns and stalks away back down the row of beds towards the other end of the barracks. 

Flo gives her a slow clap as she returns to her bunk, grinning unpleasantly from ear to ear. "Nice one. Damn good show, Dart, just as I asked."

"Shut up," Karlach answers, tossing herself facedown onto her mattress. The engine is still running hot, surging pain through her chest and her head and her arms with the slow letdown of adrenaline; she can smell it searing a scorched mark into the bedsheets. "You too - just... just shut up and leave me alone.”

[theminecraftbee]

When Cleo arrives at Joe's base, they discover him leaning over the increasingly large lockbox he uses to take things between seasons.

(At one point - when Cleo had first met him, actually - the thing had been tiny. Not much point taking that much between super hostile worlds. After they'd gotten onto hermitcraft, they'd discovered the box he'd used to carry stuff from season one to two was a bit larger. Now, she's not sure whether they should call that thing a 'lockbox' or a 'safe', honestly, but whatever it is, it's still liftable, so probably not a safe? It's not important. They share space with him, because they'd never felt the need to get one of their own, but occasionally...)

Anyway. When they find him, he's in his pinball back box, surrounded by shulker boxes he's not using, leaning over the lockbox, staring at something.

"Hey, Joe," she says.

"Hey Cleo," Joe says, not looking up.

"Did you lose something between here and Empires?" Cleo asks. "I didn't see you bring that thing with you to the Rift."

"No, no," Joe says. "I, uh - honestly, was looking for something else, got a bit stuck. Forgotten I'd... I mean, it doesn't really matter, I think, I'd just forgotten I'd put some of these things in here. I didn't have that much time to - well, no, I guess we had like, two months to think about it -"

"...lose something from season eight, then?" Cleo says, and they don't quite succeed in leaving their voice quite as light.

Joe shrugs. "Was actually looking for this thing Scar gave me after six, but..."

"Yeah?"

Joe picks up a notebook. It's dirty, but at least it's not singed, the way Joe had laughingly told Cleo half his clothes were, after. Cleo had laughed back and made a comment about dusty endstone. Both of them had made new wardrobes.

They suppose it wouldn't be. If he hadn't put it in the box before the moment of...

Joe flips through the pages. He shrugs, a tiny little hesitant motion, and gestures at the last page.

Cleo grimaces. They'd forgotten just how... messy... Joe's measurements had gotten over time. The ink is splotchy and inconsistent. There's a strange air of finality to the numbers, just as much as there's a strange sense of resignation to the observations he'd written to the side of them.

The date on the measurement is December 21st.

It's the last measurement.

"Oh," Cleo says.

"I really wasn't looking for it," Joe says, and his voice is tiny.

"I didn't think you'd keep them," Cleo says helplessly.

"I have - the castle floorplans are in this," Joe says.

"Oh. Right. And you kept -"

"I wouldn't not."

"Of course."

The two of them look at the notebook again for a little bit.

"It's really been a year and I didn't notice?" Cleo says.

"I mean - I mean, we didn't really think about - dates are a social construct," Joe says.

"It feels like the kind of date I ought to remember, is all," Cleo says. "Given."

"Christmas is in three days," Joe says. "We didn't do anything last year. That's why I was looking for - I mean, obviously we didn't do anything last year. What with the, you know, everything. But I was looking for some of the stuff I had - Scar gave me this thing after season six that I was gonna hide for him during the party."

"Are we having a party? All of those people are here," Cleo says. "Oh, god," they say after another moment. "Just because I forgot the date doesn't mean... all of them are here. Do you think someone ought to warn them that..."

"I mean, uh," Joe says. "I mean. We both forgot..."

He looks up. Cleo looks up with him. The sky is blue. It's lightly cloudy. It's a cold day. Everything is on the ground that ought to be on the ground, and everything in the sky is the place in the sky it should be, for a lightly cloudy, blue-skyed morning.

"You should put that away," Cleo says.

"Now I'm not gonna," Joe says.

"Joe," Cleo says.

"Help me finish my Christmas gifts?" Joe says.

"Fine," Cleo says, and they don't talk about it. Joe puts the notebook carefully up on a shelf, flipped to the page with the floorplans. All of the chairs and beds and tables they'd never got to put in are sketched out on the pale pages, and it strikes Cleo all at once that in some ways, Atlantis is already more finished than the castle got to be.

They resolutely decide it doesn't matter. The date isn't the thing that'll remind them, anyway.

[bbymunsonx]

The Last Time (Ted's Version)

Chapter Nine

chapter warnings: language, angst, slight emetophobia, talk of sexual content

word count: 4.6k

Lacy Watson: Jamie, I heard what happened. Please call me okay?

Lacy Watson: It isn't what you think. Please call me back.

Lacy Watson: Jamie!!!

***

It's been a week since Jamie got traded back to Man City and the team's been torn up about it. Especially because we have a special game this weekend. Rebecca claims that she didn't have a choice and that his contract with Richmond had expired, but Ted doesn't believe her. I've stayed out of their argument because I didn't know any better. Either way, Jamie's gone and the team is going to have to get used to that. 

We're getting ready to travel to Liverpool to play against Everton. The boys have been incredibly on edge because Richmond hasn't been able to beat Everton in the past sixty years. 

"You really want me to come?" I asked. Ted was practically begging me to come with them. 

"Of course, I do. This is our first away game and I really want you there, Lace," Ted smiled. 

"Alright, I'll come," I beamed. I was excited about going away with the team and being able to stay in a fancy hotel. 

Rebecca Welton: I heard you're coming this weekend! Keeley's coming too! Do you wanna come on the jet with us?

I've never ridden on a private jet before, that sounds amazing. I either ride on a private jet with Rebecca and Keeley or I take a four hour bus ride sitting next to Ted. Hmmmm.

Lacy Watson: As much as I love you, I think I'd rather sit on a bus next to Ted for the next four hours. Sorry!!

Rebecca Welton: Don't you dare apologize. Enjoy the bus xoxo ;)

We all piled into the bus. I went into the back and saw Coach Beard sitting in the seat next to Ted. I widen my eyes at him that mentally said, "Get the fuck out of the seat, please." 

Like he was almost reading my mind, Beard frantically said, "I forgot to call Jane and tell her goodbye, I'll be one second." and ran from his seat. 

"I'll just keep his seat warm until he gets back," I plopped down in the empty seat, right next to Ted. 

"I'm really glad you're joining us, Lacy Loo. I feel like you're like a good luck charm, kinda like my own little four leaf clover." He looked over at me, causing me to blush. As the blush started to spread over my cheeks, it made me realize that we were never able to talk about me trying to kiss him. He's probably forgotten all about it at this point. 

"I'm glad you wanted me here. I thought after what happened the night of the gala that you didn't-" I was cut off by Roy screaming at the front of the bus. 

"OY! Pay attention! I don't wanna hear ANYTHING about some stupid, fucking curse. We're gonna go and kick Everton's ass tomorrow, yeah?" Roy screamed, causing the boys to erupt in screaming and chants. 

"What were you saying?" Ted brought his attention back to me. 

"Oh, nothing. I'm just glad I'm here." I smiled. 

The bus ride was filled with small talk and Ted reading over his divorce papers over and over again. Kind of put a damper on the mood. 

As we arrived at the hotel, Rebecca and Keeley texted me to meet them up in their suite after I had gotten my room key. Thankfully, I was able to switch room cards with Beard so I'd get the room next to Ted. 

I had taken the elevator up to the top floor and found my way to Rebecca's room. After knocking a few times, Keeley flung the door open and hugged me. 

"Hi, babe!" She squealed. She always acts like she hasn't seen me in years, which I love. 

"Hi, Keels!" I squealed back. As I loosened my grip, I looked behind Keeley and saw Rebecca standing in the middle of the room, talking to another woman. 

"Lacy, this is Flo, my oldest friend." Rebecca introduced us both. 

"Flo? Really?" The woman seemed almost offended. "Friends call me Sassy." 

"It's really nice to meet you, Sassy." I shot her a big smile. I was so excited to be able to have a girls night. After all this drama with Ted and Jamie, this was exactly what I needed. 

"Sassy was kind enough to remind me that this weekend is my wedding anniversary with Rupert." Rebecca stated. "That's why I want to spend this weekend surrounded by all my favorite girls." 

That almost made me start sobbing. I remember just a few short weeks ago, Rebecca always seemed so cold so it was really nice to know she genuinely liked me. 

"Alright, are you guys ready for dinner? I need a drink!" Sassy exclaimed as she dragged Rebecca out of the room. 

"It's gonna be a long night," I nudged Keeley as we followed the two women out of the room. 

***

We were nearing the end of our dinner as we were laughing and joking around about our sex lives. It took me a few drinks to be able to talk and laugh about how I slept with Jamie. It wasn't even until I had gotten it out that I realized Keeley was with Jamie. All she did was laugh.

"You shagged Jamie?" She gasped and laughed. 

"I could've sworn you knew!" I covered my mouth. 

"Absolutely not. I mean, he's not a bad lay." Keeley admitted, to which I nodded. 

"On that note, I am going to visit the loo," Sassy got up from the table. As she walked away, Rebecca turned to the two of us. 

"How do you like Sassy?" She asked. 

"I think I might be in love with her," Keeley drunkly joked. 

"I think she's so great," I beamed. The more girl friends, the better. 

After about ten minutes of drinking and talking some more, Sassy came back to the table. 

"You get lost, Sass?" Rebecca joked.

"I found the most handsome man outside. I wanted to shag him right then and there on the floor," Sassy blushed.

"Girl, look at you! You could shag anyone you wanted. Go get him!" I shooed her off, jokingly. 

"If he wasn't in the middle of something, he would be in my hotel room right now." She laughed.

After Rebecca paid the check, the three of us went back into the suite for a little bit to keep gossiping and talking. About an hour passed before I realized it was getting late and we had the game tomorrow morning. 

"Some of us have to do work in the morning, so I'm gonna hit the hay, ladies." I waved goodnight. 

"Nighty night," Keeley waved back, with Rebecca and Sassy waving behind her. 

As I took the elevator, or I guess I should say lift, down to my floor, I kept thinking about Ted. I felt guilty having a good night while he was struggling to sign his divorce papers. I reached my door but before I could open it, I stalled. Ted's door was right next to mine, it wouldn't hurt to pop in there just to see how he's doing. 

I turned around and knocked on Ted's door. A few seconds passed and no answer. I waited a few extra seconds and knocked a couple more times before the door flung open. "What?" He asked harshly. I've never seen this version of Ted before. He was freshly showered with his hair flopped over his forehead, not freshly styled like usual. Though he was freshly showered, he reeked of strong alcohol. 

"I'm-I'm sorry. I just wanted to see how you're doing." My eyebrows pulled closer together as my jaw clenched. The look on his face was one I've only seen with one other man...

"It's way past curfew. Go to bed." Ted spit. I just stood there, frozen, not knowing how to respond. A part of me knew he was hurting and all I wanted to do was push past him and hold him. Another part of me wanted to run into my room and sob in my pillow. "Lacy. Go." He slammed the door in my face. 

It took me second to gather the strength to turn and walk towards my room. As I walked into my room and let the door shut behind me, a sob immediately escape my mouth. My hands fell in my face as I cried and cried into the night. 

***

The sun started shining into my room, signaling the start of a new day. I had two hours to get ready before the game started. I took my time getting ready. Twenty minutes past as I found myself still sitting in the shower, scrubbing my body, making sure to scrub off all the feelings I felt last night. 

Ted isn't Julian. 

Ted. isn't. Julian. 

I put on a nice outfit and did my makeup nicely, just in case paparazzi were around of course. I exited my room, lookin left and right and only seeing an empty hallway. The stadium where we were playing was about a ten minute walk from the hotel, and I really needed the fresh air. I picked up a coffee from a local coffee shop and made my way over to the stadium.

As I found my way to the locker room, I could hear Ted's voice talking to the players which cause a knot in my stomach. I slowly and quietly sneaked my way into the locker room, but Ted immediately caught a glimpse of me, causing his eyes to widen. 

"Lacy," he rushed over to me. "Can I talk to you real quick? Privately." He looked around to the players, wanting to separate himself from them. I nodded.

Ted took my arm and led me to a private room where we could talk. 

"Ted, I-" I started before he held up his hands, trying to get me to stop talking. 

"Lacy, please. I am so sorry about how I spoke to you last night. Excuse my language, but I am so fucking sorry. I was just, I was having a bad night. A really bad night. And I took it out on you when you were just trying to be a good friend. Is there anyway you can forgive me?" His eyebrows furrowed as his eyes softened. If I didn't know any better, I would think he was trying his best not to cry. 

"There's nothing to forgive, Ted. You're human and you have human emotions. It's okay." I smiled at Ted while reaching up to give him a hug. He opened his arms and welcomed me into them, tightly. The both of us closed our eyes, letting the hug last, until we heard someone clear their throat. 

Ted looked over and gasped immediately escaping from the hug, "Sassy Smurf?" 

"Marlboro Man, so we meet again," she smiled at him. Rebecca, who was standing next to Sassy, looked at me with wide eyes once she made the connection. 

The man Sassy wanted to fuck in the restaurant was Ted?

"Small world," Ted smiled at Sassy. "What are you doing here?"

"She's my oldest friend," Rebecca awkwardly smiled. 

"What about that." Ted said with a smile still on his face. 

"Alrighty, don't we have a game to play or something? Let's go," I left the room and made my way back into the locker room. Nate was telling the team all his notes that he had for them, some of them were insanely mean, but it made the team eager to play. 

***

Thanks to Nate's pre-game pep talk, the team won, breaking their sixty year loss streak. After we all individually went back to our rooms for a midday nap, we got dressed in our fanciest outfits and went out for some karaoke. Rebecca had brought Sassy with her, who hasn't kept her eyes off of Ted all night. I went from thinking she was the coolest girl in the world to wanting to punch her in the face. There were so many men on the team and she could have any of them. But of course, she wanted the one I wanted. 

We all laughed and recorded as Coach Beard ran onto the stage to sing his rendition of "Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga. Ted was recording to send the footage to Henry when he tuned the camera over to me to capture me wiping tears off of my face from laughing too hard. 

Everyone egged me on to go on the stage, so I chose to sing Style by Taylor Swift, obviously. It a song that resembled Ted the most. During the entirety of the song, I had to watch Sassy as she swooned over Ted, but Ted's gaze, nor his camera, didn't leave me the entire song. 

Rebecca went on after me, singing Let it Go from Frozen. She was magnificent. She could easily be on Broadway if she wanted to. Out of the corner of my eye, I could notice Ted's leg bouncing up and down vigorously as he was anxiously playing with his fingers. I looked over at him with my brows furrowed, trying to ask if he was okay without outright asking him. He jumped up and ran out of the karaoke room without a word. 

I gave it a second, not wanting to get the same reaction I did last night, but obviously something was wrong. Fuck it. I jumped up and ran after him. I followed him through the club, filled with sweaty people dancing without a care in the world. As I reached the door, I looked to my left and didn't see him there, I looked to my right to see him crouched on the ground. 

"Ted, honey, what's wrong?" I knelt down in front of him. 

"I- I don't know," He stuttered. He was shaking, his eyes wandering all over the place. He was having a panic attack. 

I cupped his face with both of my hands, and rubbed his cheeks with my thumbs. "Ted, you're having a panic attack. You need to breathe."

"I can't. I can't breathe." He panicked. 

"Yes, you can. Breathe with me." I started to breathe with him, but he wasn't looking at me. "Look at me, Ted." I tighten the grip I had on his face, giving him no choice but to look at me. He nodded. 

"I'm going crazy." He sighed. 

"No. You're not going crazy, Ted." I smiled at him. "Now breathe with me." I inhaled through my nose and exhaled through my mouth, and Ted did the same. We did this ten times until I could feel his heart rate start to settle. 

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Ted profusely apologized. 

"Don't apologize. Don't you ever apologize." I kept rubbing his cheeks with my thumb, trying to comfort him. 

"I think I'm okay," Ted tried to get up. I quickly rose up so I can help him get up. "I think I'm gonna head back to the hotel for the night." 

"Okay, I'll go with you," I went to walk after him before he stopped me.

"It's okay. I think I wanna be alone for a little bit," He smiled at me. "I... I'm glad you're here. My little four leaf clover." He started walking away.

"Panda!" I screamed at him. He stopped and slowly turned to look at me. 

"Alright, I'm really glad you're here." 

I smiled at him as he started to walk away. I went back into the karaoke room where Roy had started to sing Bohemian Rhapsody. He must've had a lot to drink. Sober Roy would never do that. 

"Is he okay?" Coach Beard looked over at me. 

"Yeah, he'll be alright. He's just headed back to the hotel for the night." I replied. Sassy had looked over at me and smirked to herself. 

After a couple more songs, we decided to head out for the evening. We've had a long day and we were all getting tired. Rebecca decided to go to the bar to get a drink, Sassy went back to the hotel for the evening, and I went with Roy and Keeley to go back to the hotel. We took a scenic route around Liverpool before we all ended back at the hotel. 

"You sure you don't wanna come and hang out for a bit?" Keeley asked, causing Roy to groan in frustration. 

"I think Roy would actually kill me if I said yes, but thanks, babe." I smiled at Keeley before taking the elevator up to my room. 

As I was about to enter my room, I thought I would double check to see if Ted was doing okay. Even though he said he would be alright, I just wanted to make sure.

My fist lifted up to knock on the door but before my hand made contact, I heard something come from the other side of the door. A woman's voice, talking and laughing. Sassy. After the sounds of talking and laughing came the moaning. Sassy and Ted. My hand immediately reached up to my mouth to cover the sounds of my sobs as I ran away from the door and into my room. 

I curled up into bed with tears running down my face. Since Ted and I share a wall, and his bed lined up with mine, I could hear everything. I could hear the bed banging against the wall and the both of them moaning and laughing. God, his laugh. It was unmistakable. I laid in my bed with my hands covering my ears as I sobbed.

No, I can't do this to myself. It isn't right. 

I took out my phone and sent one quick text. 

Lacy Watson: What room are you in?

Coach Beard: 431

Lacy Watson: I'll be right there. 

I gathered my essentials in my bag and ran right to Beard's room. I knocked on the door a few times before he opened it up and his face softened. 

"I-I- I can't be in there," I cried out. I laid my head in my hands as I started falling apart. Beard opens his arms and immediately pulls me in the room and shuts the door. 

"What happened?" He questioned. 

"I went back to my room and I thought I would see if he was doing okay. But when I went to his door, he was with- he was with Sassy." I was able to say through sobs. "And I know it's silly to feel this way since we aren't together, but I- I really like him, Coach."

"I know. I know." He held my head as I cried. "Listen, I think you need to talk to him. The two of you need to talk." 

"Can we just tell him that we slept together so that we're even," I tried to joke. 

"I think he would actually kill me. I'm not joking." There was no hint of joking in voice. "Here, just stay in here for the night. I'll sleep on the pull out couch, you take the bed. You're not gonna go back to your room and have to deal with that." 

"Thank you," I smiled sadly. He got the pull out couch all ready for him while I got under the covers, still in my clothes from the day. 

"Coach?" I mustered out, still not being able to stop crying. 

"Yeah, Lace?" He called from the couch. 

"I think I love him." I whispered.

"I know."

*** 

"Rise and shine!" Coach Beard flung the blinds open. "We have two hours until we have to leave and you still have to go to your room to get your stuff."

My eyes fluttered open a bit as they adjusted to the sunlight. First, I was confused as to why I was in Coach Beard's room, but then the memory of last night hit me like a ton of bricks. My heart sank. I thought it had been a nightmare. 

"Thank you for letting me stay here last night. I just couldn't... yeah I couldn't." I couldn't even get out what I needed to say. 

"Of course." Beard smiled. I think this was one of the only times I've seen him act serious. It was a little scary. 

"I'll meet you back at Richmond. I'm gonna grab a ride on Rebecca's jet." I said before I walked out of the room back to my own. As I reached my door, I saw Sassy leaving Ted's room. 

"Oy! Lacy!" She called over to me. "You'd get lucky last night too? Look at you doing the walk of shame!" 

"Yeah, last night was so crazy." I said sarcastically. "Between the drinking and the fucking, I'm just so out of it today."

"I totally get it. Let me tell you, your coach is fucking amazing."

"Oh, Ted? Yeah he's alright." I kept my sarcastic tone to see if she would catch the hint, she doesn't. 

"He's such a gentleman. And I knew you were wondering, and yes, he does talk like that during sex and he's just so eager to please. He let me ride that little mustache like a jet ski." Sassy bragged. I'm not sure if it was because of what she just told me or if it was actually from all the alcohol I had last night, but I had thrown up all over myself. All down my outfit. It was not a good look. 

"Jesus, babe. You alright? Here, let's get you cleaned up." Sassy tried to usher me into my room. 

"No! Just leave me alone." I nudged her away from me and slammed my door shut. I immediately ran into the shower and just let the hot water wash away last nights dinner and Sassy's words. So eager to please. Her words kept repeating in my head. 

After my shower, I took out my phone to text Rebecca. 

Lacy Watson: Let me know when the jet leaves. I'd like to take it if there's still a seat for me. 

Rebecca Welton: There's always a seat for you. Are you alright? Sassy told me what happened. 

Lacy Watson: I'll tell you on the jet. 

On the jet, I told Rebecca and Keeley what happened and both of them were in awe. 

"I am so sorry, Lacy. I had no idea she was gonna do that." Rebecca apologized. 

"It's okay. I mean, it's actually not okay. It actually fucking kills me, but he's not mine. He can do whatever, and whoever, he wants." 

"Babe, you need to tell him how you feel. It's actually killing you. And I hate to see you like this." Keeley rubbed my arm. 

As she finished speaking, my phone buzzed. 

Coach Beard: Ted was asking everyone where you were. He's very worried. 

Lacy Watson: Did you know he is very eager to please? And that he even talks like that when he has sex! Thanks to Sassy, I know that now (and so do you!)

Coach Beard: I'm not sure how you want me to respond to that. 

I rolled my eyes as I put my phone away. "Rebecca, I hope it's okay that I take today off. I just want to be home."

"Yes, Lace, of course. I needed to borrow Ted for the afternoon anyway so that's no problem at all." 

After we landed, I took a cab back to my flat and immediately crawled under my sheets and went back to sleep, trying to pretend that the world doesn't exist. 

***

I must've slept the entire day away because I woke up to someone banging at my door. When I looked outside, it was pitch dark out. 

"I'm coming up!" I could hear Ted's voice call out at the bottom of the steps. Oh great. I got up from my bed and walked out into the living room, where Ted was coming up the steps. 

"Where the hell have you been?" He asked. 

"Sleeping," I groaned, still half asleep. 

"Um, alright. Why did you sleep all day? Are you alright? Are you sick?" He asked with worry in his voice. 

"Actually, I'm not alright, Ted." My voice started to break. 

"Here, how about you sit down." Ted motioned to the couch. I shuffled over to the couch and sat down, he immediately took a seat next to me. "What's on that noggin of yours?"

I couldn't get the words out to actually tell him how I felt. Every time I went to say it, the words wouldn't come out. "I..I..I'm just upset Jamie left." I panicked and that was the first thing that came out. 

"You're really that upset that he's gone?" Ted's eyes softened. 

"Yes. Yes I am." I said coldly. "Things were getting better between us. He was finally starting to open up to me and now he's gone." Ted's jaw began to clench. 

"Well, I'm sorry you feel that way." 

"Yeah, me too." I whispered. 

"Alrighty, then I guess I'm gonna get out of your hair, but please come to work tomorrow, okay?"

I didn't say anything as Ted walked down the step and left my flat. That's when I started to cry again. 

Ted's POV

After I left Lacy's room, I immediately went downstairs and banged on Coach Beard's door. He opened the door almost immediately. 

"Hey, Coach," Beard greeted. 

"I really messed up," I groaned as I let myself into his apartment. 

"What happened?" Beard asked, motioning for me to sit on the barstools in his kitchen.

"Well, you already know I slept with Sassy last night, but I didn't tell you all of it." I cringed. Beard didn't verbally respond, but nodded his head, telling me to continue, "The entire time I was with Sassy, I was picturing Lacy. I mean, the entire time. Sassy is such a lovely woman and I feel so awful but, Coach, I don't know if it's because of the divorce or what, but... I don't know. I think I might like Lacy."

"Ted, if you think it's just feelings because of your divorce, then you're stupid." Beard finally spoke. 

"What do you mean?" I questioned, oblivious to what he was insinuating. 

"I mean, you've been in love with this girl since the moment you saw her. Maybe even before that. Do you remember when we had the team party a year ago, and you saw her with Julian? You never treated Julian the same after that." 

"Yeah, but I didn't even know her back then. I just saw her with her boyfriend, no big deal."

"You already had those feelings for her since before you actually got to know her, and now that you know her... your feelings are running rampant."

"Well, it doesn't even matter if I like her or not, she likes Jamie." I lowered my head. 

"I think you need to talk to her. You don't know everything." Coach Beard raised his eyebrow at me. 

"How do you know?"

"I know all." Beard answered. He's right, he always knows everything about everyone. 

I smiled at Beard slightly. "Thanks for listening, Coach." I left his flat and headed back to my own. Now, I just had to get unstuck from my own head. 

Lacy's POV

I hadn't moved from the couch in a few hours as I got comfortable in the couch hole I was creating with my body. Suddenly, someone is banging on my door. 

I groaned and got up from the couch. "Ted, I need to be left alone." I moaned as I was walking down the steps. I flung the door open and my blood ran cold. My eyes widen so much they almost fell out of my head. 

"Hey, Ace. You miss me?" The man on the other side of the door smugly said. 

I was able to sputter out one word, "Julian?"

authors note: this chapter and the next chapter were probably the most fun to write !! just a lil fact about me but I'm actually a senior in college. im minoring in creative writing so anytime im writing this story it always feels like im doing homework (in the best way possible lol) see u besties in the next chapter. buckle up ;)

taglist: @nerdgirljen

[forever-fixating]

WIP Wednesday

Howdy, yall! Thanks to @onthewaytosomewhere and @priincebutt for the tags! Aunt Flo came for a visit (if ya know what I mean), so I was down for the count for a couple days. But I have some goodies all the same. Teasing both stories yet again because I'm a nerd and can't stop at just one. Under the cut, enjoy!

living in a new normal

June and Nora arrived two days before they went set to depart for Paris. They made a day of shopping for last-minute items. Henry desperately needed some fresh wardrobe pieces for future date nights with Alex. Absent Pez, June was happy to dispense her fashion expertise.

“Oh, what about this one?” she suggested, selecting a soft pink linen shirt from a rack. “It would really complement your complexion. Plus it’s light enough for a summer evening stroll.”

Henry held it to his chest and looked in the mirror. “I think you’re right. I tend to stick to familiar colors. Lots of blues and such. My best friend Pez is always goading me into branching out.”

“Nothing wrong with having a signature color,” June smiled. “With those eyes of yours, blue is a no-brainer, but it’s always good to have a little variety.”

Henry folded the shirt over his arm with his other selections. He and June drifted toward the front of the store. As they paused near a display of trousers, Henry said softly, “I want you to know that I care about your brother very much.”

June looked up at him, her expression inscrutable. Henry licked his lips. “That is to say…this isn't some fling for me or an easy way to get a free vacation to Europe. I’m not going to drop him once the tour is over. I know a lot can change in three months, and Christ, maybe he will be the one to toss me aside-”

“He won’t,” June said firmly. 

“You can’t know that.”

“I know my brother,” she insisted. Henry’s mouth snapped shut at the certainty in her tone. She took a deep breath. “Despite what the tabloids might say, Alex isn’t some playboy screwing models or actresses left and right. When he’s in a relationship, he gives it his all. Maybe too much. The dumbass may claim he can do casual, but the only person that has ever really worked out with was Nora and only because they both had eyes for other people.”

Alex’s laugh rang out from another part of the store, full-throated and carefree. June smiled in the direction of it. “I never met Jasper. After what we “affectionately” call the fuckening, I was worried the trauma Alex experienced would keep him closed off from seeking out happiness for a long time. You were an unexpected but very welcomed surprise, Henry. You brought the light back out in him. I may not have seen you two interact all that much, but I can tell from the tone in his texts and phone calls how much he cares about you.

Henry felt his throat tighten at her kind words. She reached out to grasp his free hand and finished by saying, “I know you’re concerned with what people will think. But you’re not in this alone. The thing you’ll learn about the Claremont-Diaz clan is once you’re in, you’re one of us and we look out for each other. Remember that, okay?”

A Tournament for His Heart

As Alex watched them talk, he felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up. Phillip nodded, and Alex stood, following him through another door. This led to an office, dark save for the moonlight from the window. Alex watched as Phillip pressed part of the mantle, and a panel in the wall released with a click and swung out. He looked at the prince, who said, “Follow the passage.”

Hope rose up within him as he stepped over the threshold. His footsteps echoed off the stone. He summoned a small orb of light to guide his path, and it floated in front of him like a phantom. As he walked, descended a set of stairs, and continued down another passage, another sound joined his footsteps. Soft at first then growing stronger with each step: piano music. Finally, he saw a sliver of golden light as he reached the end of the passage. Alex’s hand reached out and pushed the door open wider. Revealed was a small library, a fire crackling. A familiar figure sat at the piano. The golden head, hair longer than Alex remembered, looked up from the sheet music.

“Hello, cariad.”

A/N- My bestie Kate has been such an incredible help with these stories, especially LIANN. If yall thought Love on the Menu was romantic, JUST YOU WAIT. Paris is gonna be two parts and loaded with enough romance to give you cavities. Stay tuned!

[killerfrostisme]

I was quite surprised to see that there weren't many fanfics where Lucy gets her period. It's a normal part of most uterus bearing people's lives, and to be honest I'd like to see it represented in YA books too. It's 2024, let's not act like we don't bleed.

Hence, this is my humble attempt to change that.

This one takes place between TSS and TWS and follows book canon:)

Lucy could always tell when she was about to get her periods. Besides the fact that she always felt like death, she also started to resemble one of the Visitors she and her team desperately tried to snuff out. Rarely could she not predict the time when Auntie Flo would come traipsing into her life. Whenever she saw the telltale signs of a period fast approaching, she'd prepare well. She would pack her kit bag with extra tampons and loads of chocolate. She'd also make sure she'd carry a plethora of painkillers. She almost always got it right.

Almost.

It was a light case and Lockwood and Co was feeling quite relaxed. The owners of the house had informed them of a benign spirit-a probable Type One-whose only job in death was to float on the top of the landing and exude forlorn energy. Upon further research, George uncovered a news article which stated that an old couple had died within a week of each other. The man first, of natural causes and the woman next, of a broken heart. Even though, the spirit was supposedly a Type One, Lockwood had been quite adamant about taking extra iron fillings and even an iron chain, which was typically not required for a Type One case. Lucy had to admit, he'd really stepped up the leadership game after the mishap at Mrs Hope's house.

It was just as well since there wasn't just one ghost but two!

The containment of the sources (a pair of delicate satin slippers for the wife and a pair of silver wire rimmed glasses for the husband) were an easy affair. After dropping George off at Portland Row (he'd had a nasty fall on the stairs in the haunted house and just wanted to sleep the pain away) and with both sources safely ensconced in silver nets, Lucy and Lockwood set off for the furnace.

They sat in a comfortable silence for the entirety of the ride to the furnace. The kind of silence that's brought on by a sense of not knowing each other well enough, but with a desire to change.

Lucy was feeling quite woozy after the case, and chalked it down to just plain fatigue. They had been going on an awful lot of cases after the success of Combe Carey and she hadn't really had enough time to sleep. When they got out of the cab, Lockwood flashed her a tired grin, and she momentarily forgot about her wooziness. Strange. Maybe she's not as tired as she thought.

-------‐‐--‐----------------------------------

"Feeling alright, Luce?" He asked, after handing in the sources. They were standing outside the building, waiting to hail a cab to go home.

"Yes, I think so." she replied, wincing a bit when a sharp shooting pain pierced her lower back. "Why do you ask?" she asked, in what she hoped was a nonchalant manner.

"No particular reason." He responded, keeping his eyes on the road in front of them, searching for an empty cab. "It's just- you've been a bit quiet today. Not to mention, I've seen you wincing here and there. Are you hurt?"

Oh. So he'd caught that. He was a lot more observant than she gave him credit for, she supposed.

"Oh no, I'm fine."

They lapsed into silence yet again. This one seemed more pregnant than the easy one they'd shared in the cab on the way over. Lucy was desperately trying to recall her cycle dates and was drawing a blank. She knew she hadn't packed her period kit with her, and her emergency pad-she mentally berated herself-was safely sitting on her dresser in the attic at Portland Row. She was completely defenseless. Her only option? Freebleed and try not to stain everything under the sun. The silver lining was that at least she was going home.

She fidgeted uncomfortably. When was that damn cab going to arrive? How much longer was she supposed to suffer in agony? Why were women cursed with this abomination every month? Why did men get off scott-free for literally everything in life? Why was the patriarchy-

A delicate cough roused her out of her mental rant. "Is it-is it" Lockwood began, one hand rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. "By that I mean, do you-are you-"

"Oh, just spit it out!" she snapped.

Lockwood looked over at her in a mix of shock and surprise, which immediately made her feel guilty. She didn't mean to speak to him in such a belligerent manner, but he was really testing her patience. It was late, she was tired and her hormones weren't being very cooperative.

She tried to tone down her aggravation, (she still seemed to be glowering at him) and spoke- "What were you trying to say, Lockwood?"

He swallowed and continued in a wary manner, as if he were scared of her biting his head off at the next opportunity. "I was just wondering, are you feeling okay?"

"Yes."

"Okay. Is it your time of the month?"

"Just because I'm annoyed that doesn't mean I'm on my period. It could also imply that I'm just in a bad mood or someone has done something to piss me off."

"Okay. Noted."

A pause. And then-

"But, yes. I am on my periods."

"Ah."

Silence.

"My condolences." He cleared his throat, very evidently in the excuse of doing something."Oh look, there's the cab." He said in obvious relief.

‐------------------------------------------

Who the bloody hell says "my condolences" in response to "I've got my period"? Was he absolutely mental? He too had apparently thought it was an incredibly daft thing to say to someone, because he'd kept up an imperceptibly long stream of chatter throughout the cab ride. In the one year that she'd worked at Lockwood and Co, Lucy had never heard him to be as loquacious as he was that night.

What did Lucy think of the company? (it was good) Were she and George getting along? (yes) What were her thoughts on the Kuriashi Turn? (it sucked) Did she think that Karina from Tendy's and Hussain from Bunchurch were shagging? (no comments). He wanted all the answers tonight!

"Ah, we're here." said Lockwood, with an air of forced positivity, as the cab screeched to a halt outside Portland Row.

Lockwood paid the driver and they got out of the car. They shuffled into the house quietly. The air was palpable with tension. The kind of tension brought on by two people who don't know who to bridge the chasm between them.

"Listen Luce," he said, catching her arm and gently pulling her towards him. They had reached the landing outside Lockwood's room. "I'm sorry for acting like a knob. I don't want you to feel as if you can't talk about your periods. I know it's a slightly awkward topic but they're natural. I want you to feel safe enough to talk about whatever you want because this is your house too, Luce."

Lucy gave him a slow, hesitant smile. "It's all right," she reassured him. "I wasn't exactly being very nice either. I'm sorry about that. I'll work on it."

Lockwood smiled at her, and she felt it shoot straight to her heart, warming up her insides and making her forgot all about her menstrual cramps. Of course, it had nothing to do with Lockwood though. Her body was probably happy about being home. Definitely nothing to ponder over later.

"Is there anything I can do?" He said, in an earnest manner.

"Yes," she said, surprising them both. "You can tell me more about Hussain and Karina's supposed antics over a cup of hot cocoa."

"Deal," laughed Lockwood, "there's much to share with regards to that particular subject."

------------‐---------------------------------------------------‐---------------

They stayed down in the library chatting for ages. Lucy had changed into clean clothes, worn a tampon and downed a painkiller with her cocoa, but what really made her feel better was laughing with Lockwood. He made her happy. And George, of course. And her job. And Portland Row. And London.

Lucy smiled. Whatever it was, she wasn't going to dwell on it much. For now, she was just going to take comfort in his company. For now, she was just going to chuckle at Barnes' love life with a floppy haired boy. For now, that was enough.

This was supposed to be a funny, slightly awkward story. But somehow, it turned into one laced with poignancy. Especially towards the end. It just sort of ran away from me and took shape on its own.

Anyway, hope you guys liked it! Let me know if you guys did:)

[crimsonizedangel]

After A Show

Pairing: Kevin Atwater x OC

Rating: nsfw

It had been a late night for me. I was an actress and performed at local theaters throughout Chicago. We had just finished a late night Saturday show for Six the musical and we were on our way to a local club to celebrate with a few drinks. All of us had changed out of our costumes and into club attire of heels and mini dresses.

"Alicia come on." My friend Sarah said as she grabbed my hand and pulled me into the club and up to the bar.

"What are you two having?" The bartender asked us.

Before I could answer Sarah reply with "can we a round of tequila shots. There's six of us and the others are at a table back there." She motioned to somewhere behind her and the bartender nodded and rung it up on her card before preparing the shots.

We brought them over to our friends "you got tequila shots." Anne said followed by Sarah passing them out and saying "ok on the count of three everyone takes one. Here's to a great show tonight ladies."

We all took a shot and I told them I would go and get the next round of drinks. I ordered everyone a vodka cranberry so we had something to sip on instead.

"Can I buy you a drink?" I heard a rough voice ask me.

I turned around and gave him a smile "I actually just bought a round for my friends and I." I told him and motioned to where they were sitting. "Thank you though. You can join us if you'd like. We're just having a few drinks together."

"Yeah let me get a drink and I'll follow you over there. I'm Kevin by the way." He stuck out his hand introducing himself.

"Alicia." I replied shaking his hand. I waited for him to get his drink as I grabbed the tray with the cocktails.

"So are you guys here celebrating something?" He asked.

I nodded and let out a soft laugh "yeah actually we are. We are all actresses and just got through a good performance of Six the musical."

"Oh my niece wants to see that. Who did you play?" He inquired.

"I play Catherine of Aragon." I told him as we walked over to where my friends were. I set the tray down and they all grabbed a glass and looked at Kevin waiting for me to introduce him.

"Guys this is Kevin. I just met him up at the bar. He told me his niece wants to see our show so maybe we can convince him to buy some tickets and take her." I told them before taking a sip of my own drink and saw Kevin give a small wave and hello before taking a sip of his beer.

"Hey Kevin I'm finally found you." A male voice said before we saw him pop his head up from behind Kevin's tall frame. "Ooh who are these ladies?" He asked us.

"Ladies this is my friend and partner Adam." Kevin introduced the man.

I raised an eyebrow at both of them "partner? Like police partner or?" I asked and was cut off by Adam and Kevin both laughing.

"No no we are cops not gay." Adam replied laughing.

I just nodded and smiled up at Kevin. I heard the song switch and recognized it as Low by Flo Rida. I grabbed Kevin's hand and nodded to the dance floor. "Come on let's dance." I told him as I dragged him out there with my drink in my other hand.

I started lip syncing the words to the song as I started shaking my ass in front of sinking lower with the song with each low said.

When I came back up I felt Kevin grab my hips pulling me closer to him as I continued to dance making me grind my ass against him. I took sips of my drink as I danced with him trying to be careful to not spill any.

We continued to dance for a few songs each one I could feel the attraction growing along with the bulge in his pants and the wet spot on my thong.

Eventually it was late enough that I told my friends I was going to head out originally planning on going home alone but Kevin caught me outside and without saying a word just pulled me in for a kiss.

I was a little surprised but not really with how much sexual tension was out on that dance floor.

"Do you want to come back to my place?" I asked him as my Uber arrived. He just nodded and opened the door for me and got around to the other side.

We tried to make small talk with the driver so we could remain in our respective seats until we got to my apartment. I fished my keys out of my purse and Kevin followed me inside. As soon as the door was shut I put my purse down and took my heels off. The second my heels were off the height difference was noticeable but that didn't matter cause Kevin put his hands on my ass and picked me up like it was nothing. I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist which made the skirt of my dress ride up. I attached my lips to his in a hungry kiss. I slipped my tongue into his mouth letting them fight for dominance as I moved a hand to start undoing the buttons on his shirt.

He broke the kiss to whisper in my ear "tell me how bad you want me."

His breath in my ear  made me wetter as my breath hitched and my words got stuck in my throat.

"How about I show you." I finally got out and grabbing one of his hands off my ass I moved it up my skirt so he could feel how wet I was.

"Oh dear lord." He muttered under his breath and moved his hand back to my ass as he carried me through my apartment and tossed me onto my bed. I watched as he shrugged his shirt off revealing all of his toned muscles. I grabbed his belt loops on his jeans and pulled him down on top of me. His hands instantly going to the back of my dress to undo the zipper and pull it off my shoulders revealing I had no bra on. His lips went to my neck as he started kissing and sucking his way down my body being careful not to leave marks.

"Lift your hips baby girl." He muttered into my skin and when I complied he slid my dress off over my hips and onto the floor. He continued kissing his way down my body and kissed my cunt through my soaked thong. I felt him move it to the side as he licked my slick folds making me moan but it didn't last long before he stopped briefly to pull my thong off. His mouth went back to continue his mutilations on my clit as he inserted one of his thick fingers into my cunt. I let out a moan as my head pushed deeper into the mattress as I tried arching my back to push and grind into Kevin even more. He put his other hand across my lower abdomen to hold me down not letting up once except to add another finger.

"Kev, I'm going to come." I moaned out when I felt the familiar sensation building up and as he just continued what he was doing I felt it snap as I came all over his fingers and face.

He helped me ride out my orgasm before he came up for air and brought his fingers up to my mouth.

"Open." He instructed and I knew what he wanted me to do. I opened my mouth and gripped his wrist as I brought his fingers into my mouth and started licking them clean. I looked him in the eyes as I did so and heard him let out a moan followed by "oh that's so hot baby."

He removed his hand and I watched as he undid his jeans letting them fall to the floor along with his boxers releasing his thick cock from its restraints. He picked up his jeans to fish a condom out of the pocket that he proceeded to open and roll over his length. I watched as he walked back up to the bed and hooked his arms around my thighs pulling me to the edge.

He was surprisingly gentle as he inserted his erection into my dripping cunt.

"Kev you're not going to break me, I promise." I moaned out which spurred him on to start moving faster and harder.

My eyes rolled back as I let out a moan finally getting what I wanted. He was big but manageable and the way he stretched me and hit all the right spots felt amazing. The coil was building again and before I could say anything I closed my eyes and screamed as it burst and I was clenching around his cock as I came.

"Fuck Alicia." He muttered as he was barely able to move. After my orgasm subsided he picked up the pace again and the overstimulation made the coil build again. It didn't last long until his movements started to stutter as he got closer to his own orgasm and eventually he stopped as I felt him pulsating in me as he came. Both of us were breathing heavily as he pulled out to dispose of the used condom.

"It's late. You can stay if you want." I offered as I pulled an old tshirt on before climbing under my blankets. He smiled at me as he pulled his boxers back on and joined me. Both of us exhausted and drunk it wasn't long before we were asleep.

[teaandransacking]

I'm a fan of yours on ao3 and I binged your The Devil All the Time series this week - so good OMFG - and your soft smut is immaculate.

Would you bless us with some Lucy/Lockwood first time smut including the Lockwood Pajamas (tm)?

First of all YOU HAVE READ THAT FIC? I feel like only about 10 people in the world read that, and I loved writing it. Thankyou.

Just for you, please enjoy some 5-ply soft, non explicit smut.

Let's pretend these characters are 18 or older, OK? OK.

except when we went from friends to this

Words: 2500 ~ Pairing: Anthony Lockwood x Lucy Carlyle ~ Content: super soft non explicit, dreamy first-time sex.

It all begins with a present from Flo.

Lockwood is confused at first. A hotel? He hasn’t been inside a hotel - the ones that are unhaunted, anyway - since he was a small boy in a boy size suit, eating afternoon tea with his parents on his birthday. The memory makes him feel funny, and he rubs his hand over his chest as he looks down at the shiny voucher, out of place against the cheap formica of the cafe tabletop.

Flo frowns. “I hope I didn’t overstep, Locky. It’s your birthday, after all, and I thought - well, you could take Lucy with you-”

He looks up at that, and a different sort of emotion makes his chest tight. Fantasy snapshots flit through his mind. Lucy, walking down the grand staircase of a fancy hotel, a cocktail dress flaring out from her hips. Lucy, covered up to her neck in bubbles in a fancy hotel bathtub.

He could give her that.

He traces his finger along the edge of the card. “How did you get this?”

“Bartered for it, didn’t I. Amazing what you can get when you’ve got an… eclectic skill set like mine.”

Lockwood thinks it’s best he doesn’t ask any more questions about that.

“What about George?” he blurts out, wondering if the other young man will feel left out.

Flo smiles slowly. “You know I’ve never been entirely altruistic, Locky. If you and Lucy are out, well, I’ll have George and his ghormeh sabzi all to myself, won’t I?”

Oh. Lockwood looks down into his cup of tea, feeling a flush creep up his neck. “Right. And he’s…. Okay with it?”

“Would I have asked if he wasn’t?” She grins. 

Thinking about the implications of her smile and her words too long makes Lockwood think of the time with the yoga, so he blinks the image away, sipping tea. “Thankyou,” he says eventually. “This is really kind. I appreciate it.”

Flo grins that cheshire cat grin again. “No, you don’t. But you will.”

He doesn’t rise to the bait, but tucks the gold-edged voucher away safely inside his coat.

He knows what Flo thinks is going to happen if he takes Lucy to the hotel. Maybe it will, and maybe it won’t, but what Lockwood wants most is just to be with her, uninterrupted time, where they can talk and cuddle and laugh and relax, without the threat of Visitors - or any other kind of unwanted guests.

Perhaps he’ll get the Do Not Disturb sign and hang it on the door as soon as they arrive.

If Lucy agrees to go, that is.

#### 

“The Connaught?” Lucy exclaims, almost knocking over her mug of tea. She grabs it just in time, so that only a few drops spill over the edge. Her eyes are wide with excitement, and Lockwood could just drown in them, wade into those clear depths and never look back, not for anything. “That’s the poshest hotel in England!”

“So you want to go, then?” He asks, nerves cramping his stomach. “With me, I mean.”

She gives him a funny look. “Who else would I want to go with?”

He reaches across the table, from his position opposite her, runs his index finger over the back of her hand. “I wanted to be sure.”

Lucy turns her hand over, palm upwards, and tangles their fingers together. “You are a bit of an idiot sometimes, you know that?”

Relief makes his shoulders slump, and he feels the grin spread across his face. “I am well aware.”

#### 

Dinner’s at eight, the desk clerk informs them, but it’s not included in their room rate.

“Not to worry,” Lucy murmurs as they head off towards the stairs with their room key, “I packed a picnic we can eat on the carpet.”

He loves her. If he wasn’t entirely sure of it before, he is now.

The room somehow manages to be cavernous but cosy. How that’s achieved, he has no idea, and right now, he can’t bring himself to care as he watches Lucy run for the huge bed and launch herself on to it. She bounces, laughing, and it’s been so long since he’s heard her laugh like that, carefree, and when she lands, her gaze finds him.

“Come on, then! You can’t come all the way here and not bounce on this bed.”

“It’s only Mayfair,” he points out, but the smile on his face is completely irrepressible. He feels like he has to add, “at least take off your shoes.”

Lucy laughs, but wiggles to the end of the bed and shucks off her boots. “Come on, Lockwood. Remove the stick from up your arse for once.”

She says it so fondly that he can’t be annoyed, even a little bit. Truth be told, he was a bit of a stick in the mud before her, before George.

He toes off his trainers and shoves them aside before walking to the bed. For a second he falters, wondering what to do. He would have known, once, before his entire family was taken from him, before-

Lucy grabs his hand and tugs him, and he falls on top of her, their bodies flush, and she looks up at him in surprise, her lips parted slightly, and it’s an invitation he simply can’t refuse. He settles his forearms either side of her head and then he touches his mouth to hers.

It starts off soft and sweet, like many of their kisses, mostly chaste, and then she slides a hand up into his hair and sighs into his mouth, and suddenly everything inside him is on fire.

“Lucy,” he groans, drawing back to look at her. Her lips are kiss-swollen and her titian hair is spread out over the crisp, snow-white bedsheets. He’s seen some of the finest art in the known world, and none of it, not a single painting, compares to having Lucy Carlyle warm and willing under him, her gaze lust-soft and her cheeks flushed.

She smooths his hair back from where it falls over his forehead. “I did really want to see you jump on the bed, but I think this is better.”

It’s very difficult to think when their bodies are so perfectly lined up, especially since he’s never been this close to her without interruption, but he concentrates and makes himself form a reply. “I’ll do a cartwheel over the bed later if it’ll make you laugh, but for now - wild horses couldn’t pull me away from this moment.”

“You can do a cartwheel?” she asks, her brows arching up, but his expression must be a reply all in itself, because she presses her lips closed and then frames his face between her hands. “I love it here, too. I’ve, er, been thinking for a while that it’d be nice to have some time together. Hard to relax when anyone might overhear.”

“Yeah. That’s not really my thing,” Lockwood agrees.

Mischief flits across Lucy’s beautiful face. “I’d like to find out what is your thing.” And she lets her body go soft under his, spreading her legs so he’s cradled right there and his brain completely short circuits at the sensation, even through their layers of clothes.

“Have mercy,” he manages to whisper.

“On the great Anthony bloody Lockwood? Never,” she whispers, but there’s gentleness in her voice. “How about a bath, first?”

That makes him immediately imagine her naked, and for another second he can’t form a single coherent thought.

Lucy shakes her head, laughs softly, but it’s a sweet laugh, a kind, warm one. He doesn’t protest when she rolls their bodies and then hops off him, standing and holding out her hand. “Come on. A proper bath, in a proper big bath tub, with fancy bubbles! I have never had fancy bubbles!”

Lockwood has to blink again to get the cogs in his brain to turn, and then he lets himself be led into what turns out to be a palatial bathroom. It’s all sleek marble floor tiles and travertine walls, and the claw foot tub rises from the floor, a porcelain leviathan, waiting to be filled, and all he can do is stand there and imagine Lucy in it, the water fanning out her hair, and her eyes closed, long lashes resting on her cheeks.

She turns on the taps, fits the plug in the circular hole, and then eyes him. “Clothes.”

He blinks at her. “Yes. I packed them.”

Lucy rolls her eyes. “We can’t get in the bath with clothes on, Lockwood.” She grins at him, and there she is, sarcastic as ever, and suddenly he feels at home again. “I’ll turn around if you like.”

Heat floods his face, and he starts to acquiesce, and then he realises, he doesn’t want her to turn around. He wants to feel her gaze on him as he undresses, and then he wants to see her peel her own layers away, and he wants to sink into the hot water with her, feel the silk of her skin and slide soapy hands over her-

And then he’s obviously dawdled too long, because Lucy crosses the space between them and starts unwinding his tie. He gazes down at her, at the overhead lights glinting off her gorgeous, silky red hair, and he drops a kiss on her forehead.

She looks up, a small smile on her lips, and continues with her ministrations until his tie lies limp around his neck, either side of the collar of his white shirt.

“I can do the rest,” he says softly.

She steps back, grinning, her eyes eating him up, and in that moment, he feels like he could take on the world, if only he could carry the light in her gaze with him always.

He discards the tie, unbuttons the shirt. He’s been shirtless in front of her before, for short periods - one memorable time when she couldn’t sleep and came to talk to him at midnight when he was already undressed - but never like this, with this superheated air between their bodies.

Lockwood shrugs the shirt off and it falls to the floor in a whisper of cotton. He doesn’t look at what he’s doing, only at her, and the naked want in her eyes could sustain him for days.

The metal buckle of his belt clinks loudly as he unbuckles it, stepping out of his trousers and pulling off his socks, and then he’s barefoot in the fancy, high-ceiling bathroom, wearing only black boxers, and for a moment, nerves shred his stomach, but then Lucy hooks a finger in the waistband of his underwear and pulls him close to kiss him, and his fears unravel into warm yearning. His arms go around her and he holds her as their mouths whisper over each other. 

Then she draws back, smiling a little, and moves to turn off the taps. “Nice and full. Water’s going to get cold. Can’t waste it.”

He glances over at the veritable lake. No bubbles, but they’ve got all night. They can always have another bath later. He opens his mouth to tell her that it’s her turn to take off her clothes, but instead hears himself say, “Might I - can I - undress you?”

Her eyes spark. “Since you ask so nicely. Come here, then.”

Lockwood joins her by the rolltop side of the bath, his hands going to the hem of her jumper, fingers curling in the softness of it, and then she lifts her arms obligingly, and he gently tugs it off. It goes the way of his clothes, unmissed, and her tank top and jeans and socks follow, and then she stands, pale and perfect in her underwear, and the shape of her blows every one of his fantasies out of the water.

Lucy whispers, “I think we’re still wearing too many clothes for a bath,” and he grins at her, and they help each other with the last of their garments, and then climb into the tub, gazing at each other.

The bottle of body wash is glass, and scented with citrus and bergamot, and it’s silky-smooth when they wash each other with it, learning the angles and curves and lines and soft spaces of each other’s bodies. There’s no words, but there’s no need for any, not when they’re cocooned here together, warm and wet and safe and together.

The water is tepid, almost cold, when they leave the bath, and Lockwood wraps Lucy in a huge, soft bath towel, and then himself, and she laughs when they run to the bed together, snuggling under the covers until they’re warm again.

Lockwood isn’t sure who makes the first move - he’s pretty sure it’s Lucy, of course it is - but one moment they’re cuddling, talking softly, and then next moment, she’s straddling his hips, looking down at him with large, soft eyes, and being under her is bliss unlike any he’s ever experienced.

“I haven’t ever - that is…” he begins, settling his hands on her hips, wanting something, wanting everything, except to disappoint her. He couldn’t bear it.

She drops a kiss on his mouth. “I haven’t either, but I’m almost certain we’ll figure it out together.”

And they do, for the first time, and the pleasure is intense and overwhelming and so much more than he could ever have expected.

He learns what to do to make Lucy sigh his name, how to make her hands fist in the bedsheets, and he does it several more times, before they eventually remember that picnic, and they eat it wearing their pajamas, sat on the carpet, looking through the big picture window up at the stars.

“I wanted to give you something special,” Lockwood begins as they lie together, after midnight, curled up sleepily in the enormous bed. “I thought about you in a pretty dress, on the big grand staircase… having a fancy dinner…”

Lucy chuckles. “Is that what you think I want? Fancy dinners? Do I need to remind you about my feelings on horseradish?”

He grins into the dark room. “No, you don’t.” He sighs, kissing her hair. “I wanted it to be perfect.”

“Anthony Lockwood, you never know when to bloody shut up, do you? It is perfect.” She snuggles into it, slides a leg over his. “And if you really want to make up for the lack of fancy dinner, you can order breakfast in bed tomorrow.”

[mrsbsmooth]

I was wondering your thoughts on the upcoming Snog, Marry, Pie Challenge. I wish we could Pie more than one person because there are 3 people that the MC would like to Pie 😂. I know it's just guesses at this point, but what are your guesses for each character? I'm not sure about Snog or Marry, but when it comes to Pie - my MC will have to choose between Amelia, Grace, and Marshall. What are your thoughts? Thanks 😊.

Oh I'm SO EXCITED for SMP. I REALLY hope we get the option to pie more than one person.

Last season, EVERYONE PIED US which personally I found so freaking rude and annoying, like I was nothing but nice to everyone and they all pied me, the fuck?? 😂 I'm really hoping they pie each other this time

So here are my predictions:

The girls are much harder than the boys. I feel like we know so little about the other girls it's insane.

Note: I was trying to do this as [Former partner] [Amelia's former partner] etc, but it got too hard, so I'm instead going to use my own playthrough as an example.

I stuck with Elliot, so he is still there. I'm in an unofficial couple with Lewie. I'm also on a WLW playthrough, so Bella & Flo have been flirting with me. Amelia was partnered with Roberto. Andy, Francis, Jamal, Ryan, and Chloe have all gone home.

Interchange the names/characters as needed.

Girls:

Amelia: Depends. If Toby arrives before the challenge: Snog Toby, Marry Lewie, Pie Marshall. If Toby arrives after the challenge, she might forgive Marshall for now: Snog Marshall, Marry Lewie, Pie Roberto. She might marry Marshall as well who knows.

Bella: Snog Flo, Marry MC, Pie... ?? If you're on a WLW route: Snog Flo, Marry MC, Pie... Marshall? If you're not on a WLW route: Snog Flo, Marry Lewie, Pie... Amelia? Bella was coupled with Lewie in mine, and they're friends so she wouldn't pie him. Marshall or Amelia maybe? Could also be Roberto.

Flo: Depends If you're on a WLW route: Snog Bella, Marry MC, Pie Roberto If you're not on a WLW route: Snog Bella, Marry Roberto, pie Lewie No reason for it, I just think it'd be funny for her to pie Lewie.

Grace: Depends This could go two ways. If she's done with Ozzy, she'll: Snog Marshall (to piss off Ozzy), Marry Elliot, Pie Ozzy If she decides she wants one more chance to pursue Ozzy, she'll: Snog Elliot, Marry Ozzy, and Pie MC.

Boys:

Elliot: Snog Grace, Marry MC, Pie Lewie He wants Lewie to back off. If you're with Andy or Francis, I think this will be the same. Andy/Francis might decide to both snog and marry MC. They'll pie your former LI.

Lewie [or JR/R]: Snog MC, Marry MC, Pie Elliot He wants Elliot to back off. If you told him you only wanted to be friends he might marry Bella and pie MC which would be fucking hilarious.

Roberto: Snog MC, Marry Flo, Pie Amelia He's throwing his hat back in our ring lol. Could snog Amelia and pie Flo if we're on a WLW route and Flo just wants to be friends with him- who knows?

Ozzy: Snog Grace, Marry MC, Pie Marshall This is one of the few that I'm pretty sure about lol.

Marshall: Snog Amelia, Marry Grace or MC (to piss off Ozzy), Pie Ozzy Again, pretty sure about this one. He's gonna snog and marry some combination of us, Amelia, and Grace. Pieing Ozzy FOR SURE.

[videocircus]

I've been playing through the entire collection of Nancy Drew PC p&c Mystery Adventure games, developed by HeR Interactive, on and off for the past few months. The subject of today's conversation is 2005's 'Nancy Drew: Last Train to Blue Moon Canyon,' the story of a supposedly haunted train ride to Copper Gorge and the multi-generational search for a missing mine hidden by the train's original owner. The train finally arrives at Copper Gorge, and the search for a descendent of the original conductor leads side character Frank Hardy to briefly work as a Short-Order Cook, flipping burgers for information. Which brings us to Order 120363, from table 14, served by Flo.

The Hayashi Burger.

A simple beef & bun affair, which includes avocado, tomato, cheese, and inexplicably mayo, pineapple, and fruit jelly (hereupon referred to as fruit jam as to not pander to 260,033,939 adult babies).

For this recipe I need:

an untoasted bun sliced horizontally,

a beef burger patty,

two slices of fresh avocado,

a slice of fresh beef tomato,

a slice of dubiously fresh grape jam (stolen from a motel in MA),

a slice of fresh pineapple,

a slice of fresh american plastic cheese,

and finally, a slice of fresh mayonaise.

Please ignore the tin foil, it's just my reusable tin foil sheet collection.

With my accoutrement prepared and not needed to be cooked, the only thing we need to fry up is the beef.

Whilst that cooks, I'd like to take the opportunity to talk a little about my research into where a "Hayashi" burger actually comes from. The most coherrent definition of Hayashi I could find was the Japanese "Hayashi Beef" which is supposedly a derivative of the English "Hash" as in a beef hash. All recipes I found, however, use a demi-glace sauce containing onions, tomato and mushrooms to make more of a stew-style beef dish.

A YouTube recipe for "Burger Steak in Hayashi Sauce" appeared in my search results so I figured maybe watching would shine some light on this recipe. Perhaps it has been modernised to include Avocado, Fruit Jam, Pineapple, Cheese, and Mayo.

The video opens on a plate of pre-made pattys which are picked up by our protagonist, a person who wears their ring whilst handling raw meat (a level of dedication to a relationship I may never achieve). The pattys themselves clearly have chunks of diced onion incorporated into the meat; I would never claim to have the objective idea of the perfect burger, but as a bit of a burger snob myself I am adiment that pattys should be pure meat with salt and pepper, and that every other accoutrement be added after cooking. In the buns, not in the burger. Anyway, I'm critiquing the wrong things here. The burger pattys are fried and then set aside, and the residual beef grease is used to caramelise the onions and mushrooms...

Oh no, it's just onions and mushrooms again. My hopes for modernisation have been dashed once again. I was hoping the video's publishing date of October 2019 would be recent enough to overcome the sting of tradition.

Another option explored was the restaurant "Hayashi" located in Leamington Spa, coincidentally the same postcode area where I grew up. The Restaurant's connection to Last Train to Blue Moon Canyon (2005) is a longshot considering the restaurant opened coincidentally in July of 2019, the same year as our previous Hayashi Burger Steaks recipe, and also coincidentally their website's indentity certificate expired two days ago (two Hardy boys).

You know, all these coincidences are starting to add up. Perhaps something more sinister is at play here, some supernatural force calling me to this burger. I'm not one to claim "Demon" after a meager three coincidences, but I started to feel like completing this burger would summon a demon. I decided to cast a protection spell just incase.

For this recipe I need:

a candle,

a piece of dusty, antique jewlery,

an essential oil,

and a protective crystal.

For the purposes of this spell, watches count as jewlery.

They will watch over the following preceedings.

After that everything should be a-ok, but be on the look out for apocalyptic indications, maybe someone push the doomsday clock forward a couple of minutes.

After a bad luck streak on the general web I took myself to the HeR Interactive website to check the FAQs, figuring this question is probably asked all the time.

Nothing, huh. Well, if you get nothing from the creators the next best place is the fans. However, after perusing the various forum posts still I came up empty handed.

So, I suppose we may never know the origin story of the Hayashi burger. Well, unless some intrepid explorer were to send some sort of email to HeR Interactive, politely requesting some background information on the development of Last Train to Blue Moon Canyon…

Couldn't be me.

Our beef burgers ended up a little underercooked but we'll just say medium rare is part of the recipe. Our burger lays on the bottom of the bun, which usually I would be firmly against as the rising heat will wilt all of our accoutrement, but this time whatever Nancy wants, Nancy gets. The avocado is next which creates an unstable balancing platform for the rest of our heavy ingredients which will in time smush the avocado down. Next, our slice of tomato which becomes a surface on which to spread our grape jam. The viscosity of the jam comes in handy to secure the pineapple slice in place, which for absolutely no reason is the recipient of the unmelted cheese slice. Finally, perhaps the biggest crime, mayonaise. Now, I would consider myself a huge fan of mayoniase, a 'stan' even. When I refer to mayonaise in this recipe as "criminal" I am mostly hung up on the combination of creamy mayo with sweet jam and sour pineapple.

It is complete.

As with all happy memories, this needs to be captured on an analogue medium. Today we're using the Polaroid OneStep Express in Silver, using Polaroid Colour 600 film.

#polaroidmoment #filmisnotdead

And, the moment of truth. It tastes…

Horrendous.

It mostly just tastes of the pineapple which makes sense seems it's the most overpowering flavour in the whole burger. Damn you Australians. The grape jam adds about as much as a pinch of sugar would, which combined with the eggy, oily mayonnaise is a nightmarish pallet nauseator. The tomato and the avocado both bring nothing to the table, and need I even mention the unmelted cheese? Bleugh...

So, if you ever find yourself at a diner in the middle of the Colorado desert, do yourself a favour and just order the regular cheese burger. You may think you can trust the sweet waitress with the quaint name, but the short-order cook is completely new to this job and the burger might just have been thought up in a fever dream of jam sweats.

[currentlyfckingurmom]

Her Song part 36

The dress is short. It ends just below my ass and hugs every curve. It's black with a low neckline and a lace back. It's a little slutty, but that's exactly what I wanted. Scarlett and Lizzie are meeting us at the club in half an hour, so I put the finishing touches on my look. Flo's favorite deep red lipstick and a necklace that teases my cleavage. I'm confident; I know I look hot. But for a moment, insecurity and nerves tie my stomach in a knot. My fingers dust over my lower stomach, my eyes locked on the bulge of fat. My legs could certainly look better. This dress shows a lot. Is it too much? Am I trying too hard?

Is that why she doesn't want me?

"Y/N, darling, are you almost ready to go? We'll have to leave shortly," Flo calls through the bathroom door.

"Um, yeah. Yeah, I'm just about ready to go." I nod to myself in the mirror, trying to bring back the confident woman who stood there just moments before.

Flo is silent for a few seconds. "Is everything okay, love? You don't sound like yourself."

Love. I take a deep breath and hold my head high. What am I doing? I'm fucking hot. Who cares if I have stomach fat? There's this thing called a uterus, and it gave me my own little Satanist. And thighs are hot as hell.

I open the door and smile at Florence. "I'm ready."

Her face falls slack as her eyes fall up and down my body, indiscreetly pausing to gawk at my cleavage. She's dressed up in a lacy black two-piece jumpsuit with gold accents and jewelry. She looks incredible.

"You look amazing, Flo," I whisper.

"I...You- you look..." Flo trails off. I raise an eyebrow slightly and smirk at her lack of words. "You look gorgeous, Y/N," she finally finishes. I grab her waist and pull her into a kiss, which soon breaks apart due to our wide smiles.

"The car is here. Shall we?" she whispers.

"We shall."

We slide into the backseat of the car and I sit directly next to Florence, placing my hand just above her knee. She smiles and kisses the side of my head. As the minutes pass by, I slide my hand higher until my fingers are resting just inches from her center. I hear her take a shaky breath and I mentally pat myself on the back. I pull my hand away for the rest of the ride.

When we arrive at the club, the bouncer lets us in and Flo calls Scar to ask where we should meet up. Scar tells her they already found a table, so that's where we head. And 'table' was a bit of an understatement; it's velvet sofas arranged in a small area with a glass coffee table in the middle.

"Holy shit, you guys are hot!" Lizzie yells. My face contorts in shock, only to internally nod in understanding when I notice the empty glass in her hand.

"Says you, Olsen," Florence answers.

"Hm, you clean up nice, Y/N. Should've kept you for myself," Scarlett winks.

"Maybe you should have," I flirt back.

"You know, I disagree," Florence says, knowing we were only joking. But she still wraps an arm around my waist.

"I'll go grab us some drinks. What do you want, baby?" I ask Florence, playing with her short hair.

"A vodka martini, please."

"Shots!" Lizzie yells while Scarlett nods in agreement.

"Yeah, yeah, okay. One vodka martini and plenty of shots," I say.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?" Florence asks, rubbing my lower back.

"I'll be fine. Don't party too hard without me," I whisper before grabbing the back of her neck and kissing her softly. A loud whistle breaks us apart and I glare at the culprit, Scarlett, before leaving to order the drinks.

At the bar, I tell the bartender what I want, then sit on a stool as I wait.

I hear a woman next to me order an old fashioned, and I look up to see a very familiar blonde woman.

"Dr. Robbins?"

She turns to look at me before smiling wide with recognition. "Y/N, hey! How are you? How's Syd?"

"I'm good. Syd's doing great, actually. It's crazy seeing you here. Are you here with anyone?"

"Um, no. No, I'm not," she answers with a smile.

"Oh my god, you have to come sit with us. At least for a few minutes," I say as bartender hands us our respective drinks.

She hesitates, but ultimately agrees. "Yeah, okay. Why not?"

"Yes! But fair warning, Lizzie's already tipsy."

"Oh, this'll be fun."

When Arizona and I get to the table, we receive mixed reactions. Scarlett looks confused for a second before realizing who is with me. Lizzie just looks happy to be there. Flo, however...well I can't really tell what she's thinking. She smiles and greets us, but it's not sincere. I take my place next to Flo and Arizona sits across from us, next to Lizzie.

As the hours float by and our brains get foggier with the alcohol, it feels like everything begins moving faster. Arizona seems to be Lizzie's new best friend—both of them are seriously intoxicated and laughing at God knows what. Scarlett is flirting more and more with each passing second. And Florence keeps tossing back drinks, her hand never leaving my knee. She isn't saying much but I know what she's thinking. She doesn't like this—Scar's flirting, Arizona's presence, all of it.

"C'mon, let's dance," Lizzie slurs, grabbing Arizona's hand and dragging her to the dance floor.

"You coming?" I ask Flo. She shakes her head no and says she's alright, so Scarlett grabs my hand and we follow the other two girls.

At some point, I end up sandwiched between Scarlett and Arizona. Scarlett's hands are running down my sides from behind while Arizona is grinding on my front. I go along with it, laughing as Lizzie pretends to throw money at us. I meet Flo's cold eyes from across the room and toss her a wink.

"Holy shit, there's a stripper pole. Y/N, get your ass up there right now," Lizzie yells. I can't tell if she's joking or not, but pretty soon I'm being pulled toward the small stage, so I guess she was pretty serious.

Throwing back a quick shot of clear liquid courage, I step onto the stage. No one is paying attention except for our group of girls. A slowed version of "Earned It" with heavy reverb starts playing and I walk around the pole, mentally preparing myself for what I'm about to do. I might regret this in the morning but right now there's enough alcohol flowing through my veins to blind me from any kind of sanity.

I grab the pole with one hand and swing my hips toward it, sliding down it and back up again. I wrap one leg around the pole and swing my body around the cold metal, smiling when Lizzie whoops. Holding onto the pole with just my legs, I run my hands down my chest and lean backwards, arching my back. I grab the pole with one hand and pull down the strap of my dress with the other.

Still in the air, I slowly move my hips against the pole, earning a low whistle from Scarlett. I drop my feet to the ground and my high heels make a small thump, then I drop it down and arch my back. I meet Arizona's eyes and wink as she swallows thickly.

I slowly saunter off the stage and lean over Arizona, placing my hands on her chair on either side of her head. I stare into her eyes as hers glide down my body, her hands moving toward my hips.

"Uh uh, no touching," I gravel. Her hands drop back down and I straddle her waist. I pull down my other dress strap. My hips begin moving more and more as I simultaneously run one hand down my body and the other hand down Arizona's. I grind down hard once—enough to make her gasp—then I turn around so my back is to her front. I grind my ass hard into her lap and she moans in my ear.

"Alright that's enough," Flo says from behind us. I don't even know when she came over.

"Oh come on, Flo, it's just a bit of fun," I whine, stopping my movements on Arizona's lap.

"Come with me now, Y/N," she says. She's clearly pissed so I stand up. She grabs my hand and drags me across the club, shoving me into a bathroom and locking the door.

"What the fuck was that, Y/N?" she yells.

"They wanted to see me do my thing, so I did my thing," I say as if it's obvious.

"Oh, okay, so you just flirt with Scarlett all night, then practically fuck the woman you know has the hots for you. Is that it? No big deal huh? Just a bit of fun? I am your girlfriend, and if that's how you think a relationship works, fuck you!"

"You know what, Florence, I have tried to communicate but you will not listen to me! All I wanted was to have a little bit of fun for one night. And yeah I got carried away. But maybe that wouldn't have happened if you would just fuck me already!" I yell back.

Suddenly she shoves me backwards into the door, pushing her lips against mine. She grips my waist tightly and I run my fingers in her hair, trying desperately to pull her closer. Her tongue invades my mouth and I moan. She picks me up and I wrap my legs around her waist, pushing my pulsating center against her stomach. She carries me over to the sink and puts me on the edge of the counter, fondling my breast with one hand as the other ventures between my legs, shoving my thong aside and teasing the outside of my entrance.

"Fuck, Flo, please," I whimper.

"You sure? Wouldn't you rather have Arizona in here?"

"No, Flo, please, I love you. I only want you, baby, please."

She crushes her lips back into mine while plunging two fingers into me, her thumb lightly circling my clit. She continues her motions while pulling my dress down and brining her lips to my nipple, sucking and swirling her tongue around the hard peak. Her fingers continuously rub against my G-spot and within a couple of minutes, my mouth drops open in silent screams and my legs twitch around Flo's waist.

I pant heavily as she pulls out her fingers, sucking off the remnants of my orgasm before kissing me, allowing me to taste myself on her tongue.

"I love you so much, Flo," I whisper. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I should've just talked to you."

"It's okay, love. Just, please, remember that I love you and we're in a relationship. If we're gonna work, then we need to communicate."

"I know. I wanna spend forever with you, Flo."

"Are you guys fucking in there?" Lizzie yells through the door. "Because margaritas just went 2 for $4 so hurry up!"

[attonitos-gloria]

18, 36, 58 for the spotify wrapped?

aaahh HELLO FRIEND <3 thank you for this ask.

18. 'Alright', by Keaton Henson. When I tell you I only listen to sad songs you think I'm joking!?!! I am not!!!

36. 'Foreigner' by Jordan Mackampa. Ahh, that was one of theee most songs of this year. I spent so much time this year writing/reading in English that I hadn't realized how this... kind of gets to your brain? like, the barrier of language sometimes? because language is not just pragmatic communication, it's also a sort of way of interacting and reading and understanding the world [see: Arrival] and I think writing and reading and listening songs basically in English this year [as demonstrated by all the songs in my spotify wrapped] absolutely changed the way I thought about things. English is a very pragmatic language! Of course his experience living in London all his life but being a Congolese by birth and speaking French as a first language is much more intense than mine, but I don't know, when I first heard the song I couldn't stop listening to it. 'I seemed to find my way around these complicated foreign sounds, but had no-one had told me there would be all of these changes'.... Sorry for rambling. Jordan's voice is so beautiful.

58. 'Girls against God', by Florence and the Machine, hahahah the spiritual crisis never ends! Thank you flo. it's literally the title of my blog so you can see how she's woven her golden strings onto my heart! when i decided to wage holy war, it looked very much like staring at my bedroom floor: but oh god, you're gonna get it, you'll be sorry that you messed with me. what an insane thing to write. also the last seconds of this song are almost an entire horror novel in three lines?! 'dance fever' is a great album, flo is great.

[dependable-magnet]

helllo u really sold me on flo/freddie/walter so i humbly come to ask for more headcanons 🥺 any clothing hcs? do any of them share/steal each others clothes? is walter allowed to have a family that actually approves (since flo and freddie’s parents are MIA)? how do flo and walter react to the concussion making our boy a sunglasses feminist king? SO MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT THEM

Oh I am so very glad to tell you moreeee

-For clothing, Freddie and Florence alone never shared much, not for lack of trying. A lot of Freddie's clothes were too small for Florence and Florence's clothes were often very not Freddies style (they're t4t4t your honour he's picky about what womens clothes he will wear, even as a joke) but when Walter arrives? Gloves are off, Florence and Freddie can both wear his clothes and they will. Walter is initially a little annoyed when there's two whole people wearing his clothes that he himself would like to wear, so he ends up wearing some of Florence's clothes as part of a Bit(tm) but actually. Kinda slays. Even if its a little too short. Anyways at some point once they're all moved in together their closets just merge.

-In terms of Walter's family, he does have a mother he doesn't really talk to often, but certainly he goes to certain holiday family gatherings. The first time around he went alone (tells the others, "you guys would hate this") but the next time one rolled around they insisted they really did want to come. While they weren't completely honest about the situation, the story was that Freddie and Florence were a couple themselves that were also Walter's friends, who didn't have anywhere else to be on (insert holiday here, theres multiple), and Walter's family is very much a "take anyone in and feed them and make them feel welcome" type of family.

-I know the Sunglasses Feminist thing is A Bit(tm) but I will use this as an excuse to explain where I think their relationship stands around the musical. While I'm a big fan of letting them be happy, there is a very sad musical in the way of that.

I imagine Florence hasn't formally broken up with them by the beginning of the musical, but has become very distant. While Freddie sees her leaving them as a huge betrayl, Walter sees it as more of a setback, which is why he puts in more of an effort to lend a hand to her and Anatoly, really for her sake. Of course, he's still oppertunistic and wants to get something out of it on the way. On one level he wants her to be happy, and on another he wants to convince her to come back to them. (Telling Florence that Anatoly is married is very deliberate here.)

Freddie's sunglasses feminist awakening is when he's coming to the point of realizing that he is quickly running out of options where he gets to keep his dignity. He too wants Florence back, and he's done crying about her leaving.

The final scene is actually what put me on to these three together. This version of the Walter and Florence end scene really does read as him trying to convince her to come back, rather than berate her the way Broadway feels. Especially with Freddie bringing her her luggage afterwards. He, too, is over feeling mad. They both just want her back.

And soms bonus hcs you didn't specifically ask for!

-They have a cat. They didn't set out for a cat, but they all seperately started feeding the same stray until it saw them walking all together and insisted on coming home with them.

-Not US Tour compliant, but I would imagine Florence finds out Walter is working in assistance of (not employed by. I don't think Walter is DIRECTLY working for the CIA in the US Tour, just doing the odd favor, and is well connected enough that it pays off) the CIA first. Potentially Freddie never finds out. If he does, it leads of the biggest fight of the relationship, and it takes a while to get over.

-The board game nights. Ooooh the board game nights. It gets intense, it gets competitive. You know that one video where the people are playing monopoly and all in character and being dramatic? Moody lighting and all? Yeah its like that.

[now-we-say-c0ral]

June 20, 2023

Woke up at around 6am. I initially tried to wake up at 5am because I wanted to go to the gym today considering that after today's shift, I'll be going to Flo's surprise birthday party, but I failed because I was just too tired from yesterday. I kid you not, standing with a lead gown all day really is tiresome. Arrived at work around 7:45am considering that I woke up late, took a shower late, got to the station late, everything was late but me arriving 15 minutes early at work. My guardian angel, you're really working overtime. Homie's got me.

I was with Ate Soucel, Shaunie, Marta, and ate Mel today in Spines. We had one patient which was for a spinal fusion but I wasn't able to scrub because Shaunie was already backscrubbing with Mel. Oh well, I'll just take my time with this one. I'm not really in a rush to start scrubbing again after like a month and a half of hiatus but I'm not complaining really. They'll let me when they want to and to be really honest that's fine with me. Surgery finished around 2pm and we really had nothing else to do. We just prepared the set for tomorrow and the day after.

Went home at around 5:40pm and went to UCLH to meet with Eddie because we were going to Flo's together. We went to Lidle first to get some snacks and drinks then we took the Hammersmith and City line to get to Flo's near Shepherd's Bush. We passed by a burger house before infiltrating Flo's crib and the burger was actually good.

We got to Flo's and saw Ben's Switch. He had like more than 20 games in his console and it's quite impressive actually. We met some of Ben's friends and Cyneil, Raiza, and Harry came as well. Had a few conversations here and there and it's actually quite draining me to talk to people I don't really talk to on a daily basis. It's like an anxiety thing but Ed said I did great especially with the English lads.

Flo finally came and we surprised her because she had no idea that her friends would be coming over to greet her. It was quite a nice gesture orchestrated by Ed and Ben. Flo really is lucky to have such nice friends. I wish I had friends like that. I'm working on it. Jan and Laura came as well at around 10pm.

We went home at around 10:30pm and arrived home after an hour. Showered and played Diablo 4 then slept. Eddie called me 'his home' and there was nothing sweeter that he ever said to me before than this. I love this guy so much.

[roseofdarkness0]

"...."

". . .'

Sluuuuuuuuuuurp

"Louisiana oh my god I will murder you"

"I thought you were agnostic?"

"AND I THOUGHT YOH WOULDNT BE DUMB ENOUGH TO START FIRE IN THE HOUSE IN STATE KNOWN FOR WILDFIRES"

"Well that's on you and I'm horribly offended you thought I wouldn't try to bake those cookies as fast as possible"

"He ain' wrong sha"

"Louisiana I swear I will-"

"Excuse me, is this your house?"

All three states stopped their bickering to look at the firefighter that approached with troubled look on his face. Hysterically, California recognised the 118 on red background of the helmet and prayed to all that could have mercy on him that LA wasn't working dispatch today.

They will be in deeper shit with Gov anyway and he wasn't looking forward to adding teasing on top of that.

Louisiana clearing his throat and Florida not so gentle nudge paused him back to the reality, blushing he cleared his throat and nodded.

"Yes that's our shared house, we have other roommates and such-but anyway, how bad is the damage?" Cal asked with hesitation clear in their voice.

"Well good news is that damage was swiftly contained just to the kitchen and parts of living room"

"But?"

"But, it is concerning that despite the sprinklers being installed, they didn't go off nor did the smoke alarm"

"Oh! I know why!" Florida spoke brightly which made even Loui a tad uneasy and Cal hoped for the earth to split open and swallow him whole, "I took the batteries out and messed with the system!"

"Mai sha!"

"I-what?"

"Flo!!!! Why???"

"It made shrilling noises when I tried to do open flame roast gator tail! And sprinklers only killed whatever fire I had going!" Florida huffed and pouted as he kicked some rocks away "and it was supposed to be nice surprise dinner for Loui!"

"Aww-"

"No!!! Not aww!!!! We have designated backyard area for stuff like this for a reason! And I know you you use it! Real reason Flo!" Cal glared at Florida, nostrils flaring in anger.

"..... Fine, late night booze making with few others which. When we were burning some of the flavours into alcohol the smoke detector would go off but we didn't want Gov on our asses so I messed with it"

"Of course you di-" Capitan interrupted Cal incoming rant and brought them back on to topic at hand.

"... Right that was very informative but I'm afraid I might need to get LAPD involved. At least to confirm that it was just cookies this time aaand if there was some alcohol making, then we'll, I sure hope it was for fuel" Captain gave them a smile and wink.

Louisiana chuckled at that whilst Florida did full body cackle.

"Like a true Minne¹! I like you funny man!'

"Wh-how did you-"

"HEY CAP!"

Group was once again startled by arrival of another firefighter who immediately got 'Cap' attention telling and pointing to something which gave the three states time to assess the situation and how to bullshit it to Gov.

Louisiana was content to just let Cal worry about all of that whilst he made sure that Florida wouldn't run off to bother one of his alligators² that arrived to the scene in the cop car which made the captain leave to greet them when their original distractor made... well, even bigger distraction.

"I knew I recognised your voices!" The man with strange birthmark over one of his eyes exclaimed triumphantly whilst pointing wildly at them. "I saw you two at some of the bars I bartender when I was in Louisiana and Florida!" Which, not like they could dispute it or anything cause he and Florida would be too drunk to remember anyway. "And you! I helped you" the young man pointed wildly at confused California "I helped you hitchhike away from your arson case! And that body over cliff burning! Man you gotta spill how you did that!"

Cal gaped, Florida froze, then gasped dramatically at Cal and Louisiana just raised his eyebrows at the new titbit of information they just received.

"uh well-"

"FLORIDA WHAT DID YOU DO?!"

"COOKIES!!!"

Well then, time to face the music-

"IN THE NAME OF ALL THATS HOLY WHY?!"

"BECAUSE SONIC!!!"

"WHAT?!"

"oH!!!! AND AND!!!" Florida pounced on Gov, nearly making them both tumble to the ground. "Cal may be a murderer! So we need more celebratory cookies!!!"

"W H A T ?!!!"

Or maybe he should just go to the nearest drive through for daiquiri

Florida: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute.

California: No, that's not how you make cookies.

Louisiana: FLOOR IT!!

Florida: How about 4,000,000 degrees for 1 second?!?

California: yOU'RE GONNA BURN THE HOUSE DOWN-

Florida: I'M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES!

Louisiana: DO IT!

California: NO-