#and then become a pretty brick house or cobble stone street there - that would be splendid

[starchild--27]

_

[giingers]

About Time (part two)

Request: Angsty protective Tommy imagine!!              

Note: I hope you like part two everyone! I guess this is where the protective angst comes in. This is a loooong one so strap in! 

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x reader

Warnings: violence, blood, lots of cursing

If anyone wants to be added to the tag list let me know! 

Tag list: @crazyonesarethebest

@peachyblinderss

Part One                                         

The Garrison was louder tonight than it usually was, the pub packed with obnoxious and foul mouthed civilians that all seemed to have one great and equal purpose. To irritate Tommy Shelby. Well, according to his now very irritated mind that was. 

His knuckles were bone white as he thrummed one hand on the table in the private room, the other hand bringing his fifth cigarette to his mouth. He took a long and grateful drag, letting that ashy taste consume his lungs before he blew out the white puff of pollution, letting it swirl above his head like a physical embodiment of his thoughts. Since he’d stepped foot in the pub at exactly eight o’clock he had not been able to settle himself comfortably. 

His roaming eyes that were ever watchful, kept peering at the door each time it was opened. But each time so far he had not laid eyes on the person he wanted to see the most. It was now nearing a quarter past nine, according to the pocket watch that hung from Arthur’s breast, and still you had not made an appearance. All sorts of reasons for your absence from the Garrison were running through Tommy’s head. 

What if somehow the man you’d been out with had brought you back to his place? What if you were now lying in his arms, being touched and caressed the way Tommy had always dreamed of loving you? What if, in some mad whimsical moment of female hysteria you had run away with this man? Jesus Christ, Tommy thought, he was turning into a quivering mess. 

“Will you stop that Tommy, eh? You’re doing me skull in” Arthur’s brash voice wavered to where Tommy was slumped against the leather seat and his eyes of violent blue met his brothers. 

“Yeah, you’ve been fucking tapping on that table for ages now. What’s gotten into you?” John asked with a smirk from where he sat beside Arthur, both brothers secretly gloating at their brother’s anguished state.

Back at the house, Pol had declared that Tommy must have realised he was in love after the revelation that y/n was heading out with another man. John had watched Tommy for an hour now, and had watched him slip in and out of awareness for any sort of conversation, instead choosing to madly glance at the door or tap his knuckles off the table. It was comical to watch since usually Tommy was the sort of bloke that was always frigid and seemingly uncaring, but now it seemed as if he was losing his sanity. 

If John were being honest with himself though, the thought of Tommy being in love with you was not a far fetched one. He had often seen how the two of you looked at each other or how soft his brother became around you, displaying a gentle way with his words he didn’t have with anyone else. 

“Nothing’s gotten into me. I’m fine” Tommy answered, running a hand over his face. 

“Nothing got to do with a certain young lady?” Arthur grinned widely, his eyebrows raising almost comically.

Tommy Shelby actually had the audacity to blush.

“Fuck off. Don’t be ridiculous” Tommy scoffed, realising his cigarette was gone. His hand shook a little when he brought a new one to his mouth and he watched confusedly as John nudged Arthur, his eyes mischievously tracing a figure in the near distance. 

“Really? Well we’ll see about that because she just walked in” 

Tommy stiffened where he sat, all nervousness floating from his body and being replaced by a hardy sort of awareness. This had been what he was waiting for all evening, and now the spying was about to begin. 

“Don’t fucking look, John! John, act natural for fuck sake” Tommy pointed his cigarette at him, a warning flashing across his stone cold features “we’re here for a drink. Nothing more, alright?” 

“Act natural, he says?” Arthur scoffed over the rim of his whiskey glass “as if we’re not here peeping on some poor innocent lass” 

Him and John erupted into a fit of snickers which made Tommy realise just how ridiculous this whole situation was. He was actually being quite pathetic if he was honest with himself, but he knew he wouldn’t have been able to rest knowing you were out with another man. At least this way he could keep an eye on things. Make sure you were safe. Yeah that was the reason, he told himself, your safety and not his own jealousy. 

He ignored the two buffoons who were now becoming inebriated from the amber liquid that sat in the half empty bottle, and peered out of the little window in the private room. 

His stomach dropped when he saw you, now sitting in the furthest booth from where he himself sat, and as he raked his eyes over your face he felt his heart constrict. You were heavenly in pin curls that cascaded down your face and in Ada’s skirt of red velvet and a chiffon blouse, a string of ivory pearls around your neck. Your lips were shiny and your cheeks a rose pink that gave you a dewy look, and your eyes that were framed in lines of smoky black were gazing at the man in front of you. You wouldn’t look out of place on a movie poster, Tommy thought. 

You were however, oblivious to the fact that Tommy was watching you with a fondness he always reserved for you alone, but then again he was certain you’d been oblivious to it your whole life. Ever since he’d realised that girls were pretty and kissable, he had made up his mind that he wanted you. He’d been young then but his infatuation had only grown from there, and now he had become entirely devoted to you even if you didn’t know it. 

He’d easily die for you if he had to, yet here you sat before him with another man. 

He’d annoyed you earlier with his overbearing interrogation, and a rather large part of him wanted to go and apologise to you. But he stayed rooted to where he was and watched you for another while. But when you beamed at your date widely he decided he’d seen enough and closed the window shut. If you were happy, he thought, then he’d have to let you be happy. No matter how much it hurt. 

_____________

The night air was welcome as you walked down the cobbled streets, getting further from the stench of ale that had permeated from The Garrison and closer to the promise of home. William had offered to walk you back and you had accepted after a little reluctance. But he’d been perfectly courteous all evening so you didn’t seem to really believe that him escorting you to your door would be a problem. 

The evening had went well and conversation had flowed, but there had been no spark at all and more times than one you’d wanted to be looking into another pair of eyes. Tommy had never been far from your mind at all during the evening, and his words from earlier had replayed and replayed in your head. 

Did he really only think of you as a little sister? Was friends all you’d ever be? Yes, the cynic that lived in your mind firmly told you. You never know unless you try, the optimist spurred you on. 

Your focus now went to your stumbling date who had been a little on the drunk side when you’d left The Garrison. A brick wall became his new companion as he leaned on it with both hands, heavy breaths leaving his lips as he tried to regain himself. You made your way over to him, one hand resting on his back as you peered at his face. 

“Are you alright, Will?” you asked him as your eyes peered into his rather glassy ones. He just looked at you without saying a word, and for a moment you thought he was about to throw up when he leaned forward, but before you knew it his lips were on yours. 

His skin was clammy and his breath smelled of ale and cigars, and the hands that came to push you against the wall were rough and hard. You wriggled away from him, the kiss not at all pleasant and tried to brush it off with a nervous smile. 

“I think you’ve had a bit too much to drink, William” you said breathlessly, your hands against the brick behind you to steady yourself. You tried to slither your way out of his grip but he only grabbed your arms tighter, yet again slamming his lips against yours. 

You tried to kick out at him but his hands were like vices and no matter how hard you struggled you just couldn’t break free. Your heart began to pound loudly in your chest when a rough hand grabbed the hem of your skirt, yanking it up as far as he could get it and grabbing at a thigh. You bit into his lip then as hard as you could and the taste of blood in your mouth almost made your head spin. You began to scream then as loud as you could, hoping someone would come to your aid. He withdrew from you then but his hand continued its assault under your skirt while the other came and slapped itself over your mouth. You tried to push him away but he was too heavy to budge. 

“You fucking little bitch!” he slurred, the smell of his hot breath fanning over your face and you squealed when his fingers came between your legs roughly. You could feel the hot tears pouring out of your eyes then and you tried to scream again even though his hand was clamped firmly over your mouth. 

The pearls around your neck were scattered along the cobbles like the last remnants of hope that you had as William began to recklessly tear at your clothes. Buttons flew off your chiffon blouse and you cried harder at the thought of being so openly exposed to him in your brassiere. You weren’t sure whether it was the alcohol or whether he was so violently possessed all the time. He had been a friend of Freddie Thorne, and only came through Birmingham once every while for work. You guessed his fleeting visits of different cities often resulted in this behaviour. 

“Please, someone help me!” you screamed when his hand left your mouth to come to his belt “Tommy! Tommy!” 

“Scream for your fucking tinker” he spat “I’m going to take you here and now, and no fucking Shelby scum is gonna get in the way” 

It was almost like the world’s supply of irony had manifested so viciously in that moment because all of a sudden William’s weight was removed from you and when your eyes narrowed in the dim lighting of the night you made out three shapes that were now making it their business to pulverise your attacker. 

“Tommy?” you blurted out in a voice that shook with panic, but he didn’t seem to hear you. He was like a predator in that moment, all lean and dangerous with eyes that burned with the most agonising fury. Arthur and John were now throwing punches that sounded deafeningly brutal as they collided with William’s body. How and when they had come upon your struggle was lost on you, but you had never been more grateful for anything in your life. 

Groans of pain filled the air and you watched on in horror as Tommy swiftly removed his hat, a glint of silver flittering through the air and then those groans turned to screams. Blood was gushing everywhere and it dripped onto the cobbled stones as William took a swing at Tommy that the Shelby expertly dodged. A crack reverberated off the ground as Tommy pushed your assailant to the wet pavement, and like a panther who was about to devour his prey, he jumped onto William and began to make work on his face. Punch after punch was delivered and despite the fact that this man had nearly tried to rape you, you felt an overwhelming sickness at the sounds of his bones crunching beneath Tommy’s knuckles. 

John was over to you in a flash, his arms wrapping around your body and trying his hardest to turn you the other way. You could feel Arthur’s eyes on your horrified face but he just stood and let Tommy carry out his violence. 

“Look away, y/n” John was saying in your ear “don’t look at it”

“Tommy stop” you said desperately as you struggled weakly in John’s arms “you’ll kill him!” 

For the first time since coming upon you being nearly taken by a man, he looked at you and your eyes were wide with horror as they met his. He stopped his pummelling with a closed fist raised in mid air, and he let those ravenous eyes of his settle on the face of the man who had been attacking you. He was bloody and cut and bruised, with eyes that were beginning to cloud over and Tommy sat atop him like an animal who attacks in the wild. His heart was hammering out of his chest and he could feel the adrenaline course through his blood stream. He wanted to finish this man off, to make him unrecognisable, to teach him a lesson that the only reward for messing with a Shelby is death. 

But you looked so weak and frail in John’s arms and your eyes were pleading with him to stop. So he did. He rose on shaking legs to stand up and walk towards you and when he was close to you he watched as you flung yourself at him, your hands balling the front of his tweed jacket. 

“Finish him off” Tommy said venomously, his eyes boring into John’s “make sure he understands what happens when someone touches my girl. I’ll take her home” 

You didn’t have time, nor were you in the right mental capacity to question the title of my girl that had just been bestowed on you. All of a sudden you felt Tommy’s large overcoat being placed around your shoulders to cover what little modesty you had left (your crème blouse torn open and hanging from your shoulders) and then you were being guided away from the scene. 

“Don’t look” Tommy said in a voice that was dangerously calm for a man that had just committed the most violent act you’d ever witnessed. 

“What will they do to him?” your own voice was shaking and your eyes darted to Tommy’s face, but no answer was given. The only response he gave you was wrapping an arm around your waist and hurrying you along. 

__________________

Back in your house Tommy worked on lighting a fire and boiling a copper kettle over the flames for tea while you headed upstairs to clean up and remove the clothes you now felt trapped in. The bath was scalding when you slipped into it, and by the time you were finished scrubbing your violated skin you were red and raw. You had stopped shaking at least, but every time you closed your eyes you pictured what could have happened if Tommy hadn’t of been there. 

You’d learned from him that the three brothers had been at The Garrison, a fact that had been unknown to you while you’d been there, and at around ten they’d decided to leave. They’d been halfway from home when they’d heard your screams. You knew the rest of the story, and you didn’t press for any more information on what the scene had looked like from Tommy’s point of view. You’d spent your time in the bath crying and worrying about what was going to happen to your saviours now that they all had William’s blood on their hands. 

When you eventually remerged downstairs you were puffy eyed and shivering despite the fact you were wrapped up in a dressing gown. Tommy was standing by the fire, his bruised and bloodied knuckles gripping a glass of whiskey. Another glass sat on the mantelpiece. 

He turned around when he heard your footsteps and you made your way towards him slowly. He watched you now with a carefulness he’d never displayed before, and when he took the glass of whiskey from the mantelpiece to give you he watched you as if in any moment you were going to break down. 

The whiskey was hot and ripe as you swallowed it in one gulp and for a moment it gave you that burning heat you felt you needed. But the warmth was gone in a second and you were back to feeling frozen. 

“You’re bleeding, Tommy” were the first words you spoke, and you set your glass back down to inspect his face. Your hands were cold, but Tommy sighed at the feeling of relief it brought to his bruised face. He’d pulverised William for sure, but the slimy prick had gotten a few swings in himself. A small cut from one of William’s rings now bled crimson over his brow bone, and he watched as your face crumpled with worry. 

“It’s alright. I’m alright” he told you, placing a hand over your smaller one and leaving it there in a gentle hold. Suddenly the air in the room got denser and it was hard to breathe, but you stayed rooted to the spot with your hand on Tommy’s face and your eyes becoming lost in his. His beautiful face contorted in a look of anguish then, his dark brows furrowing and for a moment he looked at you like this before you realised you had begun to cry. 

“You’re crying” he almost whispered, a softness coming over him that you never knew he was capable of. His hands came to hold your face then, rough and calloused skin caressing your soft and tear stained cheeks. 

“You’re hurt because of me” you blubbered helplessly, your eyes filling with tears “you’ll all probably go to prison because of me!” 

“Don’t you dare worry about us, we can take care of ourselves” Tommy hushed you, running his thumbs under your eyes to brush away the falling tears. 

“I didn’t want any of you to get in trouble for me. What will happen if the coppers come looking for you?” you were beginning to panic now at the vision you had of the three Shelby brothers being incarcerated for murder. Because of you. 

“Fuck the coppers. Fuck them all, you hear me?” he held your face and let those beautiful eyes of his bore into yours “I would murder every fucking man in Birmingham for you, do you understand? I’d dig their graves myself and throw each and every fucker who looked at you wrong into one. What I done tonight……I’d do it again and again and again if it meant you’d be safe” 

“But….” you couldn’t come up with any words in answer, but Tommy shushed you with a soft noise as he tucked a damp strand of hair behind your ear. He looked at you for a second, and it seemed that his eyes got lighter in that moment and his body heaved with a heavy sigh as he looked at you.

It was in that instant that he was so overcome with declaration that he couldn’t stop the next words that left his mouth, and once spoken they hung within the room like electricity. 

“I love you” 

Frozen and speechless you stood there, your eyes still being locked on Tommy’s and his rough and warm hands remained on your face. You just stared at him dumbly, watching how the amber flames of the open fire flickered onto his ivory skin and how his plump lips parted slightly to let raggedy breaths escape. Time didn’t seem to exist in this universe. You could have been standing there gazing at each other for ten minutes or ten hours. It was hard to tell when no one was speaking or moving. 

You’d wanted him to say those words since you were twelve years old, and now that he’d said them your mind was working overtime trying to convince you it was a figment of your imagination. 

“No, you don’t” you shook your head, wriggling to turn away from him “you’re in shock or something” 

You could feel him stand behind you, you could hear his rapid breaths mixing with the noise of the crackling fire. But you were certain that the loudest noise in the room was your thumping heartbeat. 

“Yes, I do” he answered you softly, placing his two hands on your shoulders and turning you around to look at him yet again “I’ve loved you since I was a boy, and I love you still. That’s why I’d kill a man for touching you. It’s why I’d burn this whole fucking city to the ground. It’s why I’ve always been so protective of you, because I’ve always loved you” 

“Always?” you whispered to him, your trembling hands coming to rest on his chest. He captured your shaking ones in his warm and rough hands, and you sighed contently as he pressed a kiss to the back of them. 

“Always” Tommy answered with an honesty that alarmed you, but then a flicker of something that looked suspiciously like doubt lit up his eyes “do you love me too?” 

“Oh, Tommy” you almost cried “I love you so much. So much” 

Your answer was the only prompt he needed to place his lips on yours, and as soon as he did you felt that you were going to wake up from this dream at any second. But after minutes of blissfully kissing, with his hands in your hair and your arms around his neck, reality didn’t seem to want to interrupt. You could still feel his lips and tongue mingling with yours, and you knew that no matter how hard your cynical mind was trying to convince you none of this was real it really was happening. 

Nothing else mattered in that moment. Your ordeal with William was almost vanishing from your mind- the soft way Tommy’s fingers threaded through your hair replacing the memory. The worry of the Shelby boys being put behind bars for your sake disappeared with every brush of his lips on yours. He held you like that and kissed you and whispered I love you against your lips for what felt like an eternity. 

Nothing else mattered. Just Tommy. Nothing else. You loved him, and he loved you and everything else in the world was secondary to that. You remained in his arms for hours that night, being loved and held, all the while being completely oblivious to the fact that deep in the shadows of Birmingham, high on a hill, a fresh grave was being dug. 

[master-riku]

[Bungou Stray Dogs] 55 Minutes Part 3

BACK TO TRANSLATIONS 

Disclaimer: [ The translation pace is solely dependent on the lone translator’s availability. Also, this translation was made for myself who is still studying the Japanese language, so the translation might not be up to par to some people’s tastes. Again, I translate pretty liberally.  ]

Notes: Also this is a very short portion, but the next one should take longer to translate - but its a hefty 30 pages. Lol. So, anyway...

Atsushi was walking on the cobbled street alone.

After completing preparations at the hotel, and after a quick meeting about future plans, Kunikida instructed Atsushi to go and meet the Captain. Kunikida will come afterwards. 

For whatever reason, someone had made a procedure error in the accomodation and Tanizaki and his sister, Naomi, were given the same room.

"This is no good at all," Kunikida then ran to correct the procedure error with his face changing colors.

Atsushi looked around restlessly at his surroundings. Everything that caught his eyes seemed new. The stucco houses with a slate blowing roof, the stone gargoyle statues standing still while gazing at the sky, the white libraries with elaborate eaves were not part of the land he was born and raised. Only in books, would he be able to see the scenery of London from old photographs.

I really seem to be in a new country, Atsushi thought. He had no experience of overseas travel, so that was why the ship was, in a sense, his first foreign experience.

Atsushi almost felt like he was in a fairy tale. 

In a backalley, there is a fairy, there is a king and queen in a castle, and there's Jack the Ripper sharpening his knife with a creepy smile in the dark underground. He breathed in, the fantastical vision spreading even to his lungs. Then when Atsushi looked down at the scenery, he heard a loud voice.

"Run away, follow me!"

Quietly, a loud and noisy voice reached Atsushi's ears. Busy adults were rushing through. What are they fussing about? Atsushi stretched his neck.

"Call the police squad!" "Did you see the face?!" "Quiet about the stolen goods!" Atsushi responded swiftly to the word "stolen."

There was an uproar in the southeat. Something was stolen.

--- The request was to catch a theif on the island.

Kunikida's speech came back to him.

Atsushi ran almost reflexively.

The noise seemed to be taking place in the cargo area near the harbor.　It was an area that carried in luggage, different from the passage Atsushi and the others entered from.

There are warehouses made of bricks. Several men in blue uniforms who seemed to be officials on the island were running away in the stone wall alleys of London.

"Hey, you. Have you seen a tall man with black hair around here?"

Suddenly, one of the officials spoke to him, Atsushi widened his eyes in alarm.

"Eh...ah, no, I didn't see anyone..." He finally answered.

"If you see them, please report to the police department!" With that said, the official ran.

"U-UHM!" Atsushi called out to the officer who's back was retreating. "What happened? Was anything stolen?"

"There was an illegal entry!" The staff cried before running away from the alley and becoming invisible.

"Illegal entry?" Atsushi tried to imagine a face in his head. There was an illegal entry in this island...What did that mean? People who did not have permission to enter. But what in the world for?

"Atsushi-kun, hey, Atsushi-kun!"

For a moment, Atsushi looked around his surroundings. The uproar was far away, and there was no one around the vicinity.

"Atsushi-kun. Ufufufu. What are you doing in a place like that? I'm over here, over here!"

This voice...

Atsushi looked for the source of the voice, and suddenly kept an eye on a street corner.

There was an zinc garbage can. It was painted in an inconspicuous gray so as not to stand out in the English city landscape.

The garbage can must have been near the height of Atsushi's waist. It also was sealed by a tin cover.

The garbage can was shaking and rattling. Bewildered, Atsushi approached it.  Placing a hand on the lid, he dared to open it.

"Baa!" "Uwaa!"

Surprised, Atsushi fell on his butt while still holding onto the lid.

Dazai was within the garbage can.

Disheveled hair and a sand-colored coat. White bandages wrapped around a neck. An unreadable face laced with a smile.

"How unusual for us to meet at a place like this?"

"W-..... What are you doing in there, Dazai-san!" Atsushi shouted. Kunikida had explained that Dazai was supposed to have been at the gathering place. 

...Could it be...

"Hey, you. Have you seen a tall man with black hair around here?"

"Dazai-san, are you....the illegal entrant?"

"That's great, Atsushi-kun. Just like a detective's reasoning. It's so pleasing to have one's subordinate grow up so fast."

Dazai laughs happily. As for Atsushi, he was not able to understand half of anything Dazai was talking about.

Dazai is his senior and the first person to admit him into the detective agency. To Atsushi, he is a senior, a superior, and a benefactor who had saved him. He is all of those things, but...

"Ahh, I was so successful with entering, but I was found out by the staff on the way, so I hid in the garbage can to escape the trouble. Since I didn't have time to take out any of the trash, my body is so smelly, right now. However, there's a wonderful feeling to being a part of meaningless trash, I wonder if I should live here.

No other words came out from Atsushi other than "Ha......"

The ADA can never read Dazai's actions. At work, Dazai often collaborated with Kunikida and the others, and every time he has a stomachache. Even so, the cases involving Dazai are always solved in an ideal way for some reason. And each and every time Atsushi watches him, wondering how in the world Dazai is going to tie up the next case.

"But Dazai-san, even if you do not have trouble entering the island illegally, shouldn't you have just ridden the same boat as us?"

"There are three answers to that question," Dazai wagged his finger. "First of all, I wanted to see what goes behind the scenes around here since this is a strange island. Secondly, Kunikida has recently got too used to my behavior and his reactions have become too normal, so I am aiming to surprise him! And lastly, it's still in the midst of progress, but there's another order we've received regarding the method of smuggling inside this island."

"Ha....Another order...is Dazai-san's work different from the thief extermination?"

"The thief extermination is only a part of the danger occuring on this island," Dazai's said with his smile suddenly disappearing.

Atsushi felt the surrounding temperature drop to several degrees just from that.

"A....danger..." Atsushi somehow squeezed out of his throat.

"That's right. ........Please report to me if you see a man with a camera hanging from his neck, he wears a black suit and carries an attache case. Oh, and you better not try to capture them, they're a very dangerous person. If you make one wrong move, you could blow up Yokohama."

"Huh...?"

Suddenly, Atsushi felt dizzy and furrowed his brows. Yokohama might blow up? "What does that mean....?"

"I'm still in the middle of investigating further details. But, for now, you guys will have to concentrate on exterminating the thieves because if that's not done, then I cannot continue from here. Also, would you please take the lid for a moment?" Dazai's smile returned as he pointed at the lid at Atsushi's feet. It's the lid that belonged to the garbage can that Dazai was in. Atsushi handed it over, puzzled. 

"Thank you," Dazai said when he received it. "Oh, I almost forgot to mention, I knew before arriving here that there would be Port Mafia members on the island. Up until now, I didn't know who, but you better be careful."

"The Port Mafia...?"

Atsushi frowned. He had no good memories of the Port Mafia. It is an unlawful organization that takes residence in Yokohama.And it is tied with the Detective Agency of whom has had conflict with many times.

"Don't make such a scary face," Dazai said with a gentle voice. "They will rarely appear in places with many people. Even if something does happen, no one can catch up to Atsushi-kun fleeing!" Dazai smiled kindly. "Now then, I will pray for your success in work!"

Dazai then re-entered the garbage can and closed the lid on himself. With a light voice, the trash can jumped and rolled sideways all the way to the back of the alley and down a slope.

"Bon voyage!!!"

Leaving with an unnecessarily bright voice, Dazai rolled away.

Rolling down the hilly slope, the trash can vanished in due time.

Later, Atsushi was left alone standing still.

"Got used to that person...huh....Kunikida-san is amazing..."

[eliseecacace-blog]

Euro tour and more

So this is going to be a long blog update - probably my longest of the year as I have so so much to write! So recently i went on the long awaited Euro tour which I have been counting down the days for ever since I left ski camp! Everyday I wrote a journal entry of what I had been up too, which has come in very handy when writing this blog update as the last three weeks have been so full on and busy that its hard to keep track of what happened when! Sooo without much more, heres the account of Euro tour - the best month of my life.

So at the start of May I woke up suuper early with my bags already packed and headed to the bus stop where I caught the bus to the train station in my town. It was on the train I met up with some of my friends Pedro, Ale and Ivana, then later on Olivia, Gui, Manuela and Sequoia. We took two trains together to Linz haupt bahnhoff  and it was there we met up with everyone else! It was so good too see everyone again and meet all the oldies I hadn’t already met yet plus the Bosnian and Croatian exchange students who would be joining us for the trip! It was cool to everybody again after being apart for so long and the train station was absolutely buzzing with 100+ bags, blazers and suitcases and 80+ exchange students all gathering in a frenzy of hugs and happiness! After all the meets and greets, we then loaded the trailer with all our gear and boarded the huge double decker bus that would become our main home and transport for the next few weeks. We traveled through Germany before hitting France and I was super shocked to see how quickly the language and culture changed just from crossing one river (the border). It also made me  realise actually how much German I could understand and speak, going from a country where I could say and understand enough to get by in everyday life, to a country where I didn’t even know how to say thank you.

Strasbourg

Our first stop was Strasbourg! We arrived in our hotel in the afternoon, unpacked our rooms and had a few hours to explore the city before heading to the restaurant for dinner and then roaming the city under the streetlights in the dark for a few hours afterwards, trying not to get lost before curfew. The next day we had a great traditional french breakfast of croissants, apple sauce, french bread and pancakes before heading to the bus stop and then being taken on a tour in the bus through the city of Strasbourg. I could have sworn this city was something straight out of Harry Potter as every church, street or building we passed looked like Hogwarts or Diagon Alley. After the tour we had 7 hours free time to explore the city! This was spent going in the Notre Dame cathedral -  Strasbourgs oldest (and prettiest) cathedral, eating escargott (snails), playing frisbee in the town square and almost breaking a shop window, exploring the city and just being typical tourists. That night we went out to the restaurant for abend essen then were given some extra free time after dinner to explore the city even further at night. We got lost for about an hour that night trying to find the right hotel but nevertheless it was fun trying to navigate our way home, especially as we were all without internet and google maps which made it even more interesting. How we eventually found our way back I’ll never know.

Lyon

Stop two took us to Lyon, another beautiful city in France! Compared to Strasbourg, Lyon was more of a modern city with huge skyscrapers and buildings. Here we got the whole afternoon as free time to do whatever we wanted so I spent it with my friend Roni trying to figure out ways to get to the top of the skyscrapers for a view of the city, and exploring all the shops. We didn’t manage to get to the top of any of the buildings as we got kicked out before we even got to the second storey but it was fun trying. Lyon is a huge city though with so many people! Then with me being blonde, we walked back to the hotel as I thought dinner was at 6 (turns out it was at 7) so with an hour to spare we asked the hotel receptionist what she reccomended we do, which lead us to the trainstation in search of the zoo! French trains are super different to the Austrian system so we had to stop and ask a few locals where to go but eventually we ended up on the other side of the city and at a super beautiful park type place with lots of foreign plants, ponds, trees, greenhouses and a beautiful field full of deer! There was music playing and lots of young locals hanging out in hammocks, walking ropes they had tied between two trees, yodelling and all this other cool hippie stuff which created such an amazing atmosphere. We spent about 20 minutes there before realising we were going to be late for dinner so with 10 minutes to spare, we sprinted back to the trainstation (only having to stop and ask for directions like twice), working the subway system and then running back to the hotel - still managing to be about 15 minutes late (oops). We had free time to explore the city in the dark and there were lots of cute little outdoor marque restaurants and bar type things all lit up along the river bank with music playing which was super pretty!

Avignon

Next stop was Avignon! Its a really old city with a pretty famous bridge and lots of old castle ruins and walls which were made out of cobble and brick. It looked super ancient and had me in awe with its huge amount of history. We arrived in Avignon in the morning and it was pouring down with rain! But that didn’t stop us all from hiking up lots of steps and along a wall to a cute church ontop of a hill, and then walking to a lookout point which overlooked the whole city. On one side you could see the river, bridge and countryside and on the other side you could see the city and churches. We were all soaking wet by the time we got to this lookout point but that didn’t dampen our spirits and we proceeded to walk into the city and get some famous french crepes which are just as good as they say - if not better! The weather improved as the day did as next I went exploring with some friends around the ruins and through the town which is made up of lots of cute little alleyways and shops tucked away in random corners. There was a huge carrousel in the middle of the french markets which made the whole place feel like something out of a story book! That night after dinner we came back to the same market place for some late night ice cream which just completed my day!

Eze Village - Monaco - Cavi di Lavagna

This day was probably my favourite of Euro tour! In the morning we headed off to the first stop - Eze Village! To start the morning there we were taken on a tour around a local perfume making shop! It was super interesting being shown all the different ways they make perfume and all the different ingredients you can put in the perfume - all made from locally grown flowers and herbs as the climate and landscape of Eze village is perfect for growing flowers. All the girls were also shocked to find out that Leonardo DiCaprio buys his perfume from this shop which made it even more exciting. The whole place also smelt really good as you can imagine! After this we got about an hour of free time which I spent with Roni and Dylan walking up through the mountain shops and markets to an amazing view point and trust me it nearly brought me to tears it was so beautiful. I’ve never seen anything quite like it before! So if you are reading this and you are thinking of taking a holiday in the future, trust me when I say that this is the place to go! It is worth every penny and is guaranteed not to disappoint!! It was truly what I imagined heaven looked like. Their ice creams taste like heaven as well. Many MANY photos later, we set back on the road to our next destination - Monaco! It was cool to find out that Monaco is actually its own little country and a very cool one indeed! It was clear as we arrived that you had to be extremely rich to live there, and was obvious who the tourists were and who the locals were. Monaco had a huge harbour, docked with fancy ships (it costs around $60,000 PER NIGHT to keep your ship there) and then lots of huge fancy buildings and houses. The highlight of my time in Monaco was hands down swimming in the sea for the first time since I left New Zealand. The water surprisingly wasn’t too cold and we all spent a few hours just soaking up the salt water. The crunchy beach hair was certainly welcomed! Although Monaco’s beach was a lot different from the familiar Ohope beach, and the sand was replaced with rocks and stones, I loved it! The water was so clear and there were also alot of scenic viewpoints where alot more photos were taken! The next stop after Monaco was the cute beach side city of Cavi di Lavagna where we could see the ocean from our hotel bedroom! We had dinner straight after we arrived then went out to the beach in the dark afterwards where we found a cool rock path that took us into the ocean. That night we all hung out in our hotel rooms and put facemasks on the boys which was really entertaining and funny for us but probably not so fun for them!

Cinque Terre

A 2 hour bus ride past Cavi di Lavagna lead us too the beautiful Cinque Terre! The weather was miserable in the morning with rain threats and high winds making the boat that was supposed to take us over to one of the islands unable to operate. So instead all 82 of us boarded the train which took us to a cute town with colourful houses, a pretty church and 360 degree views! It was from this town that we began a hike that lasted around 2 1/2 hours. This hike almost sent me into cardiac arrest with the majority of it being uphill and me not having done any proper exercise for about 5 months was not ready. But the struggle to breathe was worth it in the end as the views were to die for and the destination of the hike was something I’d only ever seen on the internet and was super incredible! The weather made a dramatic turn and the sun came out and the clouds all disappeared! The island we arrived on was called Vernazza and our first stop of course was the ice cream shop where we all went back for seconds - and then bought Pizza. Our excuse was that we were just trying to make the most of the Italian culture. After this we walked around the town before setting base on the rocks next to the ocean to relax. With too much excitement and a quick spontaneous decision, three of us decided to jump in the water fully clothed which gave us a few weird glances from the locals sitting on the rocks by us but it was definitely heaps of fun! The water was a lot colder than Monaco so we swam out to a buoy to keep warm and ended up just chilling there for a while before swimming back, drying off and meeting up with the others. This day was the most fun i’d had in a long time (actually thats a lie as everyday has been a lot of fun - but this day was still extremely good) and I have never laughed so much with a group of people in my life! Another Pizza and Ice cream later it was time to take the bus to our next stop - Jesolo.

Jesolo

The place we stayed in Jesolo was the best by far! Each hotel room was double storey and had an ocean view - and the ocean was absolutely incredible! Pure white sand, crystal clear waters and warm temperatures set everyone in a buzzing mood! We all rushed through dinner before running outside to the beach for a sunset swim! If I told myself this time last year that I would be swimming in the sea in Italy at sunset with people i only met 4 months ago who have now become my best friends, I would have never believed it! It was the most incredible feeling and a lot of memories were made! After the sun set and it began to get cold we all walked back to the hotel, taking half the sand on the beach with us. 

Pisa - Lucca - Rome

Seeing the leaning tower of Pisa was something I’ve always dreamed of, but actually standing before it and looking at it in real life and not just through a screen was so much better than I could have ever imagined! Of course - Pisa was a huge tourist spot with so many people taking the typical Pisa photo. And because there are so many people that come through this city every day - the ice cream was super expensive... but that didn’t stop me. We spent a while there just soaking it all in and gazing in awe at our surroundings as I don’t think anybody could quite believe we were actually there. After a sad goodbye and a few final photos- we headed to Lucca- Tuscany! Lucca is a rather old city with lots of history and pretty buildings. All the buildings are pretty close together with one main square in the middle containing a huge church. The weather was really good which made exploring the city so enjoyable. That evening we headed to Rome where we would be spending the next three nights.

 Okay so Rome. Holy moly where do i even begin. Rome is absolutely incredible! We arrived at night time and didn’t have any time to look around as it was super late so we went straight to the restaurant with all of our suitcases piled outside before heading back to the hotel and getting some much needed sleep. The first day we spent in Rome we all had a morning tour around the city. We took the train from the side of the city where our hotel was to the centre. I was blown away walking out of the train station and seeing the colosseum straight away! The tour lasted about two hours and was super interesting. It took us round the old colonies and view points overlooking the city. At one point me and a few friends spent a little too much time taking photos and staring at the views that we ended up loosing the tour group. Luckily about 10 minutes later we caught up with a few people and were told it was free time so we spent the rest of the day walking around the city. I spent the day with my friend Olivia where we decided not to look at our map for the whole day to “let the fun find us” - which it certainly did! At the start we thought it would be a recipe for disaster as one huge city and two little foreign girls without a map or skills to communicate with anybody could go really wrong but we took our chances and turns out we were actually pretty pro at guessing where to go! We ended up in a different country! Our adventure took us across the bridge and into Vatican city which turns out to be its own country and the smallest country in the world. So now i can say I have been to the top two smallest countries in the world - Vatican city and Monaco. This adventure was incredible and we found the best pizza restaurant (sorry if this blog post is just me talking about ice cream and pizza but if you’ve ever tried Italian pizza and ice cream then you’ll understand!) We also found a cute little square full of markets which was really cute and the very type of thing I love! And then... I found a friend from New Zealand on exchange in Germany at the moment who is on his euro tour as well. I spent four days in LA with him in January, so I was super excited about being re united! It was great catching up with him again and hearing the familiar kiwi accent! So three of us spent the rest of the day together roaming rome (haha) before saying goodbye then heading back to the hotel (i’m not gonna lie - we used the map for this). After dinner we were allowed out again to see rome in the dark. None of us really knew where we were going so a group of us stuck together and ended up in a pretty park where we saw fireflies! Us Australasians were tripping out as we had never seen them before and they looked super cool flying around in the dark, like little shooting stars. We headed back for late night ice cream before bed. 

The next day we started the morning with all of the exchange students heading into the Vatican church which was unlike anything I’d ever seen before. You literally could have fit about 7321940 football stadiums, 657 olympic swimming pools and 14 zoo’s inside this one church it was so huge. Everything inside from the ceiling to the floor was so intricate and detailed the whole time I was just wondering how the heck someone could have created something so magical. Its one of those places everyone just needs to go and see for themselves as no words can describe a place like that. Then Liv and I set out on part 2 of our adventure around Rome. This time we didn’t choose to disregard the map - we lost it instead so we had no choice but to just guess where we were going. But it turned out to be another successful day as we ended up finding Trevi Fountain, another primo pizza place, a 5D dinosaur movie, some funky sunglasses and a church with a free tour in English and a dead body inside it. I threw a few coins into Trevi fountain which legend says it means that you have to come back again one day - I obviously wouldn’t mind that! Overall this day was amazing and full of so many pretty sites, adventures and lots of laughs, good food and memories! If anyone ever goes to Rome and needs two pro tour guides and navigators then give us a call and we will be happy to help :) 

Montepulciano - Florence

After leaving Rome ( sad face ) we stopped off for about 5 hours in a place called Montepulciano which was super cool as it was where a few scenes in the movie Twilight were filmed (for those of you who have seen Twilight - New Moon - it was the scene where Edward went to the voultory ). This little town was so cute and did actually look like it was a village run by vampires. It has stunning views of the countryside which I sat and stared at for about an hour. Being from the country back home I do actually kind of miss green fields and paddocks. Then we got pizza for lunch (surprise?) and explored a bit more before heading off to Florence. We arrived in Florence quite late in the night so we had dinner straight away and spent a short time exploring in the city afterwards before realising we all had no clue where we were going and then calling it a night and going back to the hotel. We then packed the bus super early in the morning before walking to the edge of the city of Florence for a tour. Our tour guide was super lit. She was a 70ish year old woman who was super funny - calling us “her darlings” and swearing way too much. She was definitely the best tour guide of our trip. We saw the famous statue of David and the most beautiful church I have ever seen in my whole life with intricate details, patterns and colours all over the outside of the church as well as the inside. Florence is a city full of old statues and beautiful tall churches. Another place I would love to come back to again one day. The only thing I didn’t like about Florence was that one ice cream cost around $12. 

Florence - Jesolo 

Leaving Florence mid afternoon and heading to Jesolo - we stopped at a really pretty view point overlooking the whole city which was super stunning. Once arriving in Jesolo, much to our happiness we found out that our hotel was a five minute walk from the beach which meant that straight after dinner we were all running down to the water for a night swim. Music playing, people dancing and swimming and playing soccer, the night was filled with so many laughs and good times. 

Venice

We took a day trip to Venice which was a day I will remember for the rest of my life! In the morning we took a 45 minute boat ride to the town. If you have read a lot of books then nothing is ever as great as you imagine. But Venice is. Venice is better. Its one of those places where no words or photographs can truly do it justice. The atmosphere, the scenery, everything about it just something you cant capture through a screen or a book. Its a place that everybody really needs to see for themselves because nothing can ever portray how incredible it really is. I spent the day there with my good pals Santi, Roni and Olivia where we took a Gondola ride through the canals of Venice. I found it super funny that all the Gondoliers were dressed in black and white stripes (it almost looked comical) and one boat even had a dog on the front of it! We then wandered round and found a navy ship museum which was incredible! There were so many boats that were suuuuuper old and some used to belong to Kings and princes and carried them from one side of the river to the other. I really enjoyed looking around and reading all the history behind the boats it was very interesting. We then met up with a few other exchange students in the main square in Venice and had a further look around before buying ice cream and heading to the water front. All along the waters edge theres boats and market stalls and outdoor cafes and musicians. Its truly an incredible place and one that I can tick off the bucket list (as well as the twenty billion other things I managed to tick off while on Euro tour.) After heading back and having dinner and another night of swimming and hanging out at the beach we went to bed to get some rest before our next stop - Verona!

Verona

Verona is such a strange place and not at all what i had in mind! Its a super beautiful city with a huge mix of modern and ancient architecture. One minute you’re walking through an alley of old brick buildings dating back to Shakespeare period and the next you’re in the middle of a street of 21st century shops. We had a tour of Verona in the morning where we went and saw Romeo and Juliet’s house including Juliet’s balcony which was super fascinating. You have to walk through an arch bridge thing to get to the balcony which is re painted every 6 months as lots of people sign their names on the walls and write messages to Juliet which I think is beautiful but some people consider it vandalism. After our free time exploring the city it was late so we headed back to the hotel in Jesolo which was like a 2 hour bus ride. Our last night in Jesolo obviously called for more night time swims and time on the beach. 

Triest - Slovenia - Croatia (Zagreb)

After loading the bus again and leaving Jesolo, we headed to Triest! We stopped at this really pretty castle type place on the waters edge that used to once be a castle but now its a museum. We had a look around inside then all bought ice cream and sat outside admiring the view and soaking up the sunshine. Was a super stunning day and our last stop in Italy before we moved on. We had a beautiful drive, crossing the boarder into Slovenia where we had lunch and drove through heaps of stunning scenery. Then we crossed another boarder into Croatia where we would be spending the next 2 nights! Croatia was absolutely amazing! The first night we arrived, my room mates and I came up with the bright idea to do the Ouija board which wasn’t actually a bright idea as we all turned super paranoid after hearing creepy noises and all were to scared to go back into the room. 

The next day was amazing! In the morning we all walked to a beautiful church we looked around in for a while (it had another dead body in it!) before we were allowed to do what we wanted for the rest of the day. The weather was super boiling and so the first thing we did was went and bought drinks. Then we spend the morning walking through the city and being typical tourists. In the afternoon we came across this epic escape room place where my friends Hannah, Olivia. Lily, Carly and I all were eager to give it a go! It turned out to be a lot better than I imagined. It was pretty much a game that lasted for an hour and you are given a story line at the start that is related to the city and history of Zagreb but there is a mystery behind the story that you need to solve. You are then locked in a series of rooms and you need to search for clues and solve mysteries in order to escape before the time runs out. This was so much fun that when we came out the woman gave us a discount on the second escape room which we obviously couldn’t refuse and was worth being late to dinner for and so 2 hours of my time in Croatia was spent locked in a room - which was well worth it! :D That night after dinner was the Oldie awards which were super entertaining (thanks Jim and Amaris) but also super sad as it means that the oldies will soon be leaving! We then spent the time after that signing journals and flags. 

Slovenia - Vienna

The next morning was sad saying goodbye to our fellow Croatian exchange students we had all become so close with throughout the 2 1/2 weeks we were lucky enough to spend together. Then with 15 spare seats on the bus, we all headed off back home to Austria, stopping in Slovenia for a bit! Arriving in Vienna it was good being back in a German speaking country where we were actually able to speak and understand the language but it was also sad knowing that it was soon all coming to an end. We arrived in our hotel in Vienna and then had the whole afternoon free where a few friends and I caught the train to the other side of the city and ended up at a theme park! This was so so epic and Roni and I went on some insane rollercoasters and a ride that went 90meters up in the air over looking the whole city before plummeting back to earth. After running back to the hotel for dinner because we lost track of time, we were then let loose again afterwards so a whole group of us went back to the theme park at night time which was insane! Best night ever! All of us stayed out till late going on way too may rides and all feeling so dizzy by the time we had to take the train back home. It was worth it. 

The next day we spent practicing our performances and songs for the District Conference. It was actually pretty fun all singing and dancing together but after a while it got tiring and I think all anybody wanted to do was sleep. 

District conference was a blast! It was held in Baden - about an hour and a bit drive from Vienna. Everyone got dressed up into nice clothes and their blazers and we all hopped on the bus ready to represent our countries in front of the Rotary of Baden. The conference started out as a kind of procession with us all walking in waving our countries flags! I was proud to be representing New Zealand. We then stood on the stage for a solid two hours singing and listening to people talk and at the end we got a huge applause and were taken on a tour around Baden before heading to a nice restaurant for dinner. After dinner the Oldies were presented with their completion certificates which was an emotional time for everyone as we have all become so close and its so sad knowing that they are going to leave soon. 

The next day was even worse, everyone filled with tears and sadness as we all said goodbye to each other - some of us for the last time - and headed to the train station together. My train was one of the last ones to leave so about a group of 12 of us were all there until mid afternoon chilling in the train station all crying and sleeping and listening to music and going for Mcdonalds runs. The train ride home was sad, each stop dropping off someone else until there were only about 5 of us left and it was my turn to get off the train and head home with Ale and Pedro. It was a sad time saying goodbye to euro tour and everyone else. 

I found that probably the hardest part of my exchange so far. And it will probably remain the hardest part of my exchange until the time comes when I have to leave this country myself and say goodbye to this year for good. Words cant describe the emotions I’ve gone through within the last few weeks, all the happiness and joy to all the bad things as well. I fully believe this has changed me as a person and taught me to appreciate every little tiny thing in life as every moment is like gold. Never in my life have I felt time going so fast, not just on Euro tour but my whole exchange. Its coming up 5 months since I left my home for this crazy adventure and yet it still feels like just yesterday I arrived. Its insane how close you can become with a group of people in such little time and how quickly strangers have become a family to me. I know this sounds really cheesy but its honestly such an insane thing to go through and if you’re an exchange student you’ll understand what I’m going on about. Saying goodbye is always going to be hard. Leaving my family and friends back home was hard but its even worse saying goodbye to a group of people you know you may never see again - especially all together in the same place. Ive shared such a huge and amazing part of my life with all the exchange students of Austria, Croatia and Bosnia 2017 and they will forever be in my heart and memories for the rest of my life! I’ve learned so much from this exchange so far, about the world and about myself, and I will continue on this adventure of a life time. I am so grateful for everything I have around me and I look forward to the future and all the great times ahead but I’ll never ever forget the past and all the incredible things I’ve been through. 

[manchattanskyline]

A Room With a View and Homemade Chicken Soup

I’d slept slightly better than the night before but still pretty badly. I put my improved slumber down to just being so freakin’ tired but today was the day we moved rooms so we re-packed what little we had unpacked (there are no wardrobes or drawers in budget New York hotel rooms so most of my stuff was still in the suitcase). After dropping our bags off at reception and being assured that we were definitely moving rooms, we set off out in the bright , wispy clouded morning. Knowing that it was a little warmer, today, we decided against thermals and just went with normal winter clothes.We were so enamoured with Caffe Roma, the night before, that we went straight back there for breakfast. Breakfast was a sfogliatella ( see here for description) and a cappuccino, which was just enough to fuel our walk up north to NoLiTa ( North of Little Italy and SoHo (South of Houston) .

After the abandonment of a highway scheme in 1966, the undesirable (and cheap) properties in SoHo became home to  artist’s lofts and residencies, before gradually becoming a more desirable area.Now, most of the beautiful cast-iron architecture and red brick industrial buildings house high-end shops, bars and restaurants. The cobbles, cast iron trimmed sidewalks and bubbled glass paving are still there, and there’s still the odd gallery and small theatre company, nestled amongst Dior, Chanel and Marc Jacobs but they are very few and far between. Hover or click on the images, below, for more info.

An achingly cool clothes shop, SoHo

Traditional cast-iron style architecture, SoHo

Bubble glass paving, SoHo

SoHo

We zig-zagged up and down the main thoroughfare of Wooster St / Spring St and then down West Broadway. We were hungry by this point and just so happened to stumble across a fabulous, traditional train-car diner, The Square Diner. There was a huge menu of mouth-watering food, from breakfast / lunch items, lighter snacks, milkshakes, and huge fried chicken meals. After a couple of days of pastries and white carbs, I opted for a chicken and rice soup. I was not disappointed. It was a clear broth with vegetables, brown rice and, of course, chicken. It was light but wholesome and I could feel my body sighing with relief, as it consumed some nutrients for the first time in a couple of days.It was great to be sat in a proper diner, complete with chrome counter, red swivel stools and surly waitresses. Even the tiny toilet at the back was a train toilet! The soup and the famous American free coffee refills had us ready to head out for what was to be the most emotional part of the trip. The 9/11 Memorial.

The Square Diner, Leonard St, TriBeCa

Square Diner, interior

  I need to start by saying that there really aren’t words that can accurately describe the feelings of being in the area of the now, Freedom Tower, formerly World Trade Centre (or Twin Towers). When I last visited in 2005, the whole area was still very much a construction site. The rubble had mostly been cleared but the smell of concrete dust still hung heavy in the air.  A lot of the buildings that weren’t damaged beyond repair had re-opened and businesses and people were doing their damnedest to carry on. There were wire railings around the area immediately affected  and there were still photos, messages and small personal items,attached to these railings. It was one of the most overwhelming experiences that I’ve ever had.

  This visit, was different in some ways but much the same, in others. There’s no denying that the memorial site is massively transformed, not least because of the re-building , regeneration and the effort to move on from the tragedy whilst still paying respects to those lost and affected. The Freedom Tower can be seen from all over Manhattan, Brooklyn and beyond and is New York’s new beacon of hope and freedom and strength. It’s illuminated brightly, at night, and shines just as bright during the day, reflecting the smallest amount of sunlight that hits it angled glass structure. The open spaces around the 9/11 Memorial , as well as the giant white span of the winged memorial museum, make it airy and light, even in the depths of Winter. Despite this, I felt an odd heavy weight. An indescribable feeling, like someone just lowered the sky and sucked out a bit of the oxygen. There are tourists and workers, alike, milling about. Talking, laughing and going about their days but as you get closer to the memorial fountains, formed from the footprints of the North and South Towers, the background noise decreases and I was aware of the louder rushing of the water, as it spills first into ground  level and then down, down, down, in to what looks like the centre of the earth. You can smell the water. It smells cold and clean and hard. It falls almost without ripples, like sheets of roaring glass. Around each of the fountains, are engraved the names of the victims of 9/11. A rose is placed on their names, on the day of what would have been their Birthdays, and there were a few dotted about that day, having been placed within the last few days, I imagine. I read name, after name, after name, trying to show each of them the respect they deserve. Like the televised reading of names at this location, on 9/11, you don’t want to miss anyone out or let one person’s name go unread. I quickly realised that it was impossible, not jus time-wise but emotion-wise to do that. Each new name brings it’s own wave of sadness, guilt and hopelessness. You can’t sustain that. I couldn’t anyway. I made the decision to stop staring into the abyss, to take my hands off the surround of the fountain, to stop tracing the letters of the names with my fingers and to keep walking. Ultimately that’s what New York did after 9/11. It kept walking. Limping, crying, wondering why, but it kept going on. It had to. What choice did it have.

I could have stayed there for a million years and still not have understood why this happened. There is no sense to be made from it. I wasn’t angry, or vengeful, just overcome with sadness. I cried. Trying to mop up the tears at first but then I just let it come. You can’t fight that amount of emotion and it felt safe to let it go, here. I can’t type this without crying, again, but I’m not sorry for that. We are human and we have human reactions to these events and it is only by having faith in that humanity that we can keep on walking.

I urge you to visit the former site of the Twin Towers. you may have a very different experience to me, and that’s OK. It’s the mixture of human experiences that builds this strong, proud, indestructable city.

As you head south, out of the Memorial Park, the high-rises and skyscrapers of Lower Manhattan behind you, the sky opens up. You can see water, and you enter Battery Park, at the southern most tip of Manhattan Island. It’s the perfect antidote to where you’ve just been. Battery Park is a park,of course,  but it also houses Castle Clinton,  a former fort, and also the ferry terminal for Liberty and Ellis Islands. This is where we purchased our Liberty Island tickets for Saturday and saw some fat cheeky squirrels and then headed back up, along the Hudson River, through the Battery Park residents areas and onto Wall St. Looking over the river towards New Jersey, and similarly the other side over the East River to Brooklyn, it looks as if Manhattan has somehow crawled cross the water as the skyscrapers and high-rises begin to populate the surrounding areas. The rivers no longer stop the march of progress. If that’s what it is.

A few steps away from the giant New York Stock Exchange on Wall St, is Federal Hall. It stands on the site where George Washington was inaugurated, as the first POTUS in 1789. Later that same year, the United States Bill of Rights was proposed here  (‘Hamilton’ fans, take note!) You can see the actual stone floor of the balcony where Washington stood. The cracks above the doorways, on the ground floor, are from the impact when the Towers came down, just half a mile away. Two moments that have shaped America, in that one spot.

Federal Hall

‘Standing on this stone’

Cracks caused by the Twin Towers coming down

As the daylight wained, a round-the-houses walk took us back to Canal Street and then back to our hotel. Chinatown takes on a new energy at evening rush-hour, with stalls popping up out of no-where selling fruit and veg and fish, and spices, and … iIdon’t even know what a lot of it was but it all looked amazing. A couple of hours later,  the stalls disappear and all that’s left is the odd person sweeping up, the smell of universal New York disinfectant and a pile of boxes next to a trash can.

We tentatively entered our new hotel room, out bags having already been taken up for us (thank you Hotel 91 staff)  Our first impressions were that it was a much nicer room, in general, what a relief. And then this.

Blurred and zoomed in but undeniably, The Empire State Building. From our hotel room window. We flung open the windows to let the rush hour noise and freezing air in, and so that we could hang out of the window and take photos of the view. We put the heating on and sat with the windows open for quite a while, just surveying the city that , for the remaining eight days at least, was ours.

To celebrate our fabulous room, we went up to Little Italy and to Sofia’s , that sweet little restaurant we’d seen before, for a full three course meal. It would be hard to close the curtains on that view. But we did. We were just so god-damn tired.

  Waiting for food, at Sofia’s, Mulberry St. 

A New York Travel Diary: Day 2 A Room With a View and Homemade Chicken Soup I'd slept slightly better than the night before but still pretty badly.