#and the thing about both these characters is that they're both so fucking YOUNG.
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exhelluvafan · 2 days ago
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The thing that irritates me the most about Helluva Boss is the adamant need to waste any potential for depth in every character. The thing that stops me from abandoning this train wreck of a show and feeling total apathy for it is its wasted potential.
TOO MUCH FUCKING WASTED POTENTIAL.
And obviously, the elephant in the room, aka the blatant misogyny and double standards because viv is writing yaoi so the fans could consume the emotional uwu moments and porn. SO MUCH PORN DAMN IT.
And the thing that eats away at me is the characters such as stolas and stella had such an easy chance to be morphed into something so deep that the show could be a soap opera about their drama alone.
In my humble opinion, the Goetia demons shouldn't have been in this show at all. They belong in a show like Hazbin that's showcasing the upper echelon of hell. This should've been about IMP, but I'm not ripping that one bandaid off because the wound under it is a biohazard. Anyway, I wanted to offer a rewrite for the 😍 lovely poor uwu baby Stolas and his DEMON, BITCH OF A WIFE, Stella. (Yeah, the sarcasm's strong with this one)
First of all I love how her name means star 🌟. It ties in together nicely with the whole astrology aesthetic of the family. We're gonna ignore the born-to-be-a-bitch personality the show presented her as having and focus on what caused her issues.
First of all, she probably knew from a young age that she was going to be wed off into an arranged marriage (just like stolas), and she knew she had the responsibility of birthing an heir. That's going to affect how she views love and marriage in general. She'd see it as a transaction, that she can offer an heir and her body, and receive what she wants. I have no problem with her being a spoiled brat, a mean girl. In fact, take it up a notch. She can be both of that! She was probably given every materialistic thing she wanted since the day she was born other than love and affection. That probably made her narcissistic and selfish, with the "I get everything that I want and you can't stop me" attitude.
She's a party girl, and we stand for that. She seems to be very extroverted and outgoing, and that clashes with stolas' more subdued and introverted personality.
I see her as being EXTREMELY paranoid about appealing to the high society that she's a part of and keeping herself at the top of the food chain amongst other aristocrats, unlike stolas who only does it to keep face or avoid getting too much attention, she wants to be noticed ans seen. Her gossipy, high society friends also reinforce the fact that she never had normal friends who cared about her, and she never grew out of her mean girl phase.
I see her as someone with so much passion in her heart, and sadly, we had to see all that turned into rage. She has trouble controlling her temper and the constant rage that boils inside her, and she explodes and lashes out on people, especially stolas.
I see her going into a marriage with stolas with the same "I'll get what I want" attitude. He has power, money, and legions to his name, and he isn't necessarily bad looking. So stella is like, "Eh, might as well..."
He isn't her dream partner, but she goes into the marriage thinking she can mould him into her dream man. Or thinking he's meek enough to leave her on her own, or she could even manipulate him to do as she pleases. None of those go as planned, though.
.
.
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I can lowky see her dragging him around as she shops and him just wanting to die inside, lol
Oh my, Anon, this quite a lot of words, but I actually really love your rewrite, I can see Stella actually watching Mean Girls while Stolas dies inside and just stares at the infinite lmao
But sadly, this is a Viv show, and you know that women in these kinds of shows aren't allowed to have any nuance beyond a one-note use or personality trait, unless they're stepping stools for the male cast, which in that case, they're allowed to have a bit more of depth, but not too much.
And yeah, actually, now that you mention it, the Goetia demons shouldn't have been in Helluva, if anything, they should've been shown on Hazbin, like you said, because we are following along a protagonist that was born in royalty (Charlie) and it would make a lot of sense to see the Goetia demons there, since it would be a royal meetup or something like that.
And lastly, about the porn... I can corroborate this since a lot of the designs made by Viv or by her team look... conventionally attractive, so conventional that's artificial and try hard at times, and also, pretty safe but sometimes pushing the limits a bit to pander to gay people (Vortex, Asmodeus and Satan, to name a few muscular characters that are quite popular, but also Moxxie, Chaz and Striker, also popular in the gay side of the fandom) but it always boils down to the same purpose: to get people horny, and this is exemplified so painfully clear when Loona shook her ass towards the camera in one of the episodes, turning out to be shameless furry bait, and when I say that these shows are gooning and softcore porn shows, it's because of deliberate shit like this.
But alas, thanks for your input, Anon, it's greatly appreciated and it's quite the palette cleanser to see someone competent pick up Viv's mess and restructure it into something actually compelling and nuanced.
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scattered-winter · 2 years ago
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it's about knowing someone so well that you know you can raise a child with them. it's about suffering so much and losing everything you once loved as a child but building a world where your child would never have that happen to them. it's about spending your life as a tragic story and making a conscious decision to close the book and find peace. and most of all it's about raising your kid with the person you've been through seven different kinds of hell with and knowing that your kid will only know about it from stories, not from experiencing it themselves
the powerful urge to give all my traumatized ocs kids after the war is over both as a sign that they have recovered enough to care for another human being and as a sign that they feel safe enough to raise children in a world they know will be better to the kids than it was to them
#i fully blame the hunger games for endearing this trope to me but its like.#what else conveys a character Truly finding peace in a world that used to be so traumatic and horrifying for them#than that same character creating/raising a person in that same world because it's no longer horrifying.#and they helped make it that way and suffered so so much to get it there. but everything's ok now#because their kid can run through fields and go to school and grow up without knowing what it's like to suffer like that.#something something that quote about legacies being seeds in a garden you'll never see#because the characters never had a good childhood but by god they can give their children a good one#anyway im oughoughough#winter speaks#tropes#these characters in particular ...#one of them lost his village to war and his people were enslaved while he was all the way across the universe#his mother sent him away so he'd be safe from the war but fate intervened and he ended up on the front fucking lines..#and the other was snatched away from his home and thrust into a war he didn't understand#but he was chosen specifically by the universe itself to fight it.#and he didn't know if he'd ever see his home ever again.#and the thing about both these characters is that they're both so fucking YOUNG.#they weren't even adults yet when they were both shoved into the war and by the time it's over it's been like 10-15 years#and they've been tortured and almost killed and hunted down and their skin has more scar tissue than not#and they're so fucking tired. they've suffered they've sacrificed they've lost parts of themselves.#but when the war is over and they can enjoy the peace they gave everything for..#and they feel safe enough to raise a family because they know their kids will never have to watch their homes burn#or their families killed and enslaved#and their team is just one massive family so the kids have aunts and uncles who have as many war stories as their parents#and just. it's about finding peace. it's about making your own peace.#i'm hurling myself off a cliff as we speak btw
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strangersynth · 1 year ago
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bc you have things to say doesn't always mean you needa say them let alone it also doesn't always mean it's your place to say them kwim
#some ppl rlly think they have a little too many rights to decide what's okay for someone to do at what age#like shaming people for what they do with themselves n their bodies in movies in socials in works in their Lives bc age this age that#go touch some grass come back when ur ready to accept u dont have a say on anybody else. not a minor and much less an 18+ person#like that one cancelling attempt over noah liking a video about his own body. or that one scene in wyfstw that had people going like;#':o oh my gawd how can he do this. how is cinema not 24/7 tame and extremely family-friendly always?? he is like 10!' and it's a 20yo#or like millie getting engaged because they're in love and ppl being like but but but she is 19!!!! well. she is also Not You and Not Yours#she and her fiance made a choice to marry. bitch you made a choice to talk and i wasnt complaining when u did it was i#/ like people's choices with who they fall in love with. like people's relationships that very much do Not include you#/ also very important; like shaming sex workers for whatever the fuck ur reason is im about to grab you by the ear and rip it off#NONE of that above and More is there for u to be without anyone even asking u all like Okay here's my veredict- girl No#ur freedom of speech hand it over.jpeg#this other day i saw this thing abt this married couple that met cause he was a 21yo#and she was 18 and she liked him and he knew and was like wanna go out or sum and now years after theyre literally married making a family#and ppl were like sorry but that mortified me i cant be the only one thats so disturbed and girl#i know you aint shaming a happy couple rn because of age difference#people turn their heads and gape like it's illegal when they hear age difference and i think yall getting a little too comfy with judging#people for who they love. for judging what u personally dont understand. if u aint been thru it u literally just dont get it#just using someone else's ongoing relationship to victimise urself get out pls and thanku#like i Know the risk that comes thru age differences no matter how big how small but risks come from many more places than one#grooming is a Very real thing and that doesnt mean you get to stamp it on everything. how about dont throw around serious terms#guilt-tripping an older person and victimising and infantilising a young person both in a relationship they want to be in#when said people aint even /you/ dont make you hero.#then again ppl tend to twist 'younger people need to feel safe' in so many ways but thats another story#like im not gonna get into guilttripping people that want to portray real feelings wants and acts onto fictional characters that make You s#mortified you start throwing Real srs allegations that you should Not be allowed to have in your vocabulary if thats how you gon use them#u Know what im talking about#sense the level of seriousness. try and be conscious of what people go through regarding said dangers#stop pointing fingers at people that have made it so far just because they could have Not made it
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undreaming-fanfiction · 11 months ago
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I am massively busy with work and finalizing my Big Bang, but this idea just won't leave...
Steve and Eddie are both actors. They're in their mid thirties, well established, but they never starred together in anything. Steve tends to be cast in the same type, the dumb but pretty love interest, Eddie has lots of indie and disturbing movies under his belt. But this time, they both landed something big.
They get cast in the new Batman movie.
Steve is, of course, Batman. He insists on doing his own stunts. He refuses to get dehydrated for his shirtless scenes because he knows how damaging it is to both young men and women alike, he's not going to contribute to shitty expectations. The director (Dustin, duh!) sees something in him other directors never have - a potential for depth, for internal turmoil. He gives Steve the chance to prove himself as an actor and Steve pounces on it.
He's still very hot.
Eddie is cast as the Joker. He is a fan of the comics and scoffs at how absurd and deranged the character is becoming. He gets hired because he immediately says he doesn't think the character needs to rely on cheap tricks and shock value to be terrifying. Cutting off his face? Not cool. He suggests to play the Joker according to one of the older comics he has - one where the Joker is actually absolutely sane, but hides it to never be held accountable for his actions. The only person who ever saw through his ruse was Dr. Harleen Quinzel. Joker took care of that issue very quickly.
The chemistry between Steve and Eddie on screen is insane. They go toe to toe, it's impossible to look away when they interact. Eddie utilizes his bright smile to the maximum, tweaking it just right within moments so it becomes unsettling. The first time he laughs, Steve gets goosebumps.
Steve encompasses Bruce's loneliness so well Eddie's heart breaks for him. Dustin finds him in the trailer, giving himself gentle slaps over the face and muttering "you're evil, damn it, you don't want to comfort the Bat!!".
Batgirl (Robin) and Harley Quinn (Chrissy) find their slow descent into love hilarious. They all become good friends on the set.
Hopper, an acting veteran who plays Commissioner Gordon, grasps Steve's shoulder after an intense fight scene and mutters: "Good job, Steve, but maybe don't stare at his lips so much?"
Robin doesn't give him the same courtesy and once Dustin yells "Cut!", she screeches: "NOW KISS!"
The movie is a hit. People love the cast and the story, some of the OG fans complain as they always do, but the ratings are great, there are many interviews, panels, all of that.
And of course, there's gossip about Steve and Eddie being a thing, which enrages the macho Batman fanbase. Their Batman isn't gay!
But the rumors quickly disappear after an award ceremony where Eddie is nominated for the best supporting actor. He wins, of course. And as he gets up to accept the small statue and deliver a speech with enough "fuck"s to give the censor a headache, he drags Steve up and kisses him in front of the whole world.
A week later, Steve and Eddie are together in front of a camera again, answering questions in an interview.
The host asks: "What do you say to those fans that are disappointed, who say that their Batman isn't gay?"
Steve just snorts, pulls Eddie closer and answers: "They're right. Their Batman isn't gay. But he's definitely bi."
Also the comic story I'm mentioning exits and is short but fantastic. 10/10 recommend.
Oh also. The first spark happens when Steve sees Eddie's hair and blurts out: "Please tell me they're not making you cut it shorter. It's too gorgeous for that."
Also because people were asking about the comics - it's Batman Black and White - Case Study and it can be found on Tumblr HERE
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bijoumikhawal · 7 months ago
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there's people who don't consider what Tain did to Garak to be abuse at all. They consider it "normal" in line with how mafia families and such act (which, someone may note, is still abuse in those cases too), and say that Garak's closet story is a lie- despite the fact that Garak tells Ezri about it without realizing that it was unusual or bad at first. He doesn't use it as a sympathetic ploy to distract her, he seems genuinely shocked and later, annoyed that she thinks that was abusive (or at least that she thinks his abuse is impacting him now).
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everybody talks about tain, and with good reason, but nobody ever talks about mila. we don’t see her very often, but these interactions just reek of abuse.
(even if “you shouldn’t be involved” was meant to be concerned/affectionate as abusers sometimes are, garak’s reaction and immediate “if it’s no trouble that is” interjection is very telling, imo.)
#I think raising your kids with the intent of being cops/spies/assassins/torturers is abuse tbh because without like#Hitting them or neglecting them you're raising them with a violent ideology where they will probably kill people#And it's at least emotionally abusive even if you don't have them actually doing that under age (child soldiers are bad for a reason)#And plenty of people DO think Garak started working for the Order before he was an adult though it's ambiguous#And people also consider if Garak honeypotted and like. Your dad picking people for you to fuck in that context is sexually violent#Both on your part and the fact that honeypotting is sexually violent towards the 'fly' esp if you're gathering blackmail#But just canonically. Tain probably locked Garak in a closet as punishment. Tain raised Garak to be a killer and a spy.#Tain took Garak’s feelings about love and service and twisted them until Garak NEEDS to be serving Cardassia and NEEDS to please Tain#And even at a young age was injuring himself in order to get Tain's approval#(Unless you think that's a lie too)#People have a tendency to handwave anything Garak says that they don't vibe with as 'he's a liar who lies'#Including things Garak says in moments where him lying does not make sense in context with occams razor#And there is no pay off or hint indicating the lie#And it feels so fucking lazy. The 'it was all a dream' of character interpretation#Why would Garak and Tain by lying about that day in the country when Tain is on his deathbed and thinks they're alone#By that point he's even admitting Garak is his son. Why would Tain be lying. How is it more satisfying if he's lying.#That's setting aside the fact that Garak does lie a lot- but most of the time his lies are fucking absurd and a smoke screen for him#Blatantly telling the truth and making it sound like another silly lie#Garak tells the truth a lot too. You need to actually understand the rhythm of a character!#I need to find that spy analysis podcast I listened to because I found their point that Garak actually doesn't lie as much as people think#Really interesting
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xf-cases-solved · 4 months ago
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guys, alex krycek is the Most Character of All Time
he's a bright young fbi agent. just kidding, he's secretly working for the shadow government syndicate. the syndicate hates him. so does everyone else. he killed mulder's father. he's a great assassin. he and his accomplice killed scully's sister on accident. he's a terrible assassin. he survived a car bombing. the bomb was put in the car to kill him specifically bc he's so bad at his job. he cannot have a single interaction with mulder that is not intensely homoerotic. mulder once beat the shit out of him in a chinese airport and then the wife of a french diver gave him the black oil virus in the bathroom. like that's not even a euphemism for anything, that's literally what happens. he's working for the syndicate again. he purges the black oil violently from his face and then gets abandoned behind a door underground. he is no longer working for the syndicate. he once beat the shit out of skinner in a stairwell. in retaliation, skinner later shirtlessly beats the shit out of him and handcuffs him to his balcony where he almost dies. it is just as homoerotic as it sounds. his parents were cold war immigrants and he's fluent in russian. we only learn this right before mulder is going to abandon him handcuffed to a car to go to russia. he and mulder go to russia. bad things are happening, but they're in it together. just kidding, krycek is working for the russian government. just kidding, now he is being held prone on the ground while people saw his left arm off. now he has a prosthetic arm. he's working for the russian government. he and marita are enemies. he and marita are fucking. it's probable that krycek doesn't know how to have relationships that aren't both erotic and filled with hate. he's on mulder's team now, he even kissed him about it. just kidding, he's working for the syndicate again. he has a remote that controls nanobots(???) inside skinner's body, allowing him to harm and/or kill him at will. it is just as homoerotic as it sounds. it's all going to hell and the only person he's going to save is himself. he helps get nearly the entire syndicate slaughtered. he throws cigarette smoking man down a flight of stairs to his death. he's a great assassin. he can save mulder's life. he's not going to save mulder's life. scully's child cannot be born. he will help them get her somewhere safe so the child can be born. he's going to take mulder's life. skinner takes his life instead. now he's a ghost. his ghost is on mulder's side. the cigarette smoking man outlives him. he's a terrible assassin
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roachliquid · 8 months ago
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Man. It really bites seeing Maximus (from the Fallout series) be so heavily overlooked by the fandom, when he is such a well-written character. Bar none, he's one of the best fictional examples I have ever seen of someone raised in a high-control group.
The Brotherhood of Steel, in their entirety, are given all the classic traits of a cult or HCG. They boast about having these grandiose ideals, all of which revolve around controlling other people's behavior. They use those same ideals to justify abusing lower-ranking members, implying all the while that it serves some greater good. And despite their supposedly rigorous beliefs, they're happy to turn a blind eye to unsanctioned abuse - because it serves the same purpose of keeping people "in their place".
Then we're introduced to Maximus - a young man who has made the mistake of taking those ideals seriously, but due to the environment he's been trapped in, was never taught how to act on them in a real and meaningful way. And in the process of figuring that out, he fucks up. (He fucks up a lot, because the Brotherhood wouldn't dare teach him anything that might help him function without their support.) But he genuinely wants to do the right thing, and we see that come through time and again as he slowly learns how to be his own person.
And yet, even with all that growth under his belt, getting away from the group isn't that simple. Because, like any high control group worth its salt, the Brotherhood doesn't want you to leave. Sure, they'll threaten to kick you out (or in this case, kill you) - because it keeps you in line. But they'd much rather have you under their thumb, so he still has to deal with the threat of getting sucked back in.
As a cult survivor, I rarely see people like me depicted accurately in the media. We're almost always either scheming sadists or helpless barefoot victims - you rarely see a nuanced depiction of how a regular person, with both good intentions and the skills needed to get away, can still end up trapped in that kind of group. Maximus is an incredible example of how that can play out, and I hope more people come to appreciate both him as a character and how well that dynamic was handled.
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pasta-in-the-pudding · 6 months ago
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This just popped up in my mind and I just wnated you to picture this
So imagine a teen kid coming to the slendermanor and obviously they're a teen so everyone expects them to be loud and trouble in general because teens are teens at the end of the day. Just to find out that the teen is actually very mature because they were forced into a situation where they had to be mature at a young age and they're just quiet(but also have mad good murder tactics). Like i just imagine jeff trying to scare the child for shits and giggles and they just stare at him like 🙂
Summary: Quiet teen reader gets into shenanigans in the manor
Genre: Fluff
Warnings: None
A/n: The battle between Jeff and children is an age old war that I don't see ending anytime soon. ALSO SIDE NOTE, I'm probably gonna be changing up my format for writing majorly soon because im tired of looking at it lolz
Credits: Any Creepypasta characters used- Creepypasta, Divider- saradika-graphics, Picture- Pinterest
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Creeps x mature!teen!reader
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Generally when kids are brought into the manor, everyone's vibe is "Aw man that's really sad :(" even if they are a teen
Of course, once they get over the sadness, the anxiety starts peeking through
Like not even just teens, all kids are rowdy and annoying so no one really wants to deal with that
So when you get there and you're chill they're like "oh thank god"
No one likes rowdy kids
However, even that can have its hinderances
Like, it's definetly nothing as bad as you being crazy around the manor, but more so just concerning habits
For example, Brian can never do his job as a caretaker, because he'll be coming down the stairs only to see that all of his assigned kids are already out of bed
And when he finally finds them, they are watching T.V
He will ask "Are you guys ready for breakfast?" and they will reply "No thanks, y/n fed us!"
Or E.J, who as we know can't stand dirty things or unhygienic things, will be so confused when that pile of trash he commented on is suddenly gone only a few minutes later
Or his fridge will magically be cleaned out right when he was about to go and do it
Toby will be wondering where on earth his favorite hoodie and hatches went, only to find you out back sharpening and cleaning them, and his hoodie in the washer
Everyone is grateful for your help and all, but it's a little strange?
Like why do you feel the need to do these things? Do you just like helping out or do you feel you need to?
Then there's Ben and Jeff
No fucks given
So what if you're like 13? Jeff was being lit on fire at that age, grow tf up 🙄
Anyways, they both get a kick out of scaring kids
Jeff more than Ben, but it's a fun little friendship activity they do together <333
So when you are exploring the manor one day, suddenly Jeff bumps into you, being waaay nicer than usual
"Hey, y/n! I was just looking for you!"
"Oh, Hello Jeff. Did you need something?"
He'll grin real big and hold your shoulders "Yeah, I just need to test something real quick, so don't move. Just stay exactly like this, kay?"
You nod and do as told, but Jeff doesn't move either, he just stands still, still holding onto your shoulders and staring into your eyes
You then feel a chill go up your spine, and all of a sudden a horrifying warped face that looks as if it was straight out of an analog horror jumps right in front of you
You do jump a little, but other than that, there's no reaction
Jeff immediately drops the act and lets go of you "Ugh, really? Whatever loser, I'll go find someone else to scare"
And with that, he stomps off, but Ben stays for a little bit, his face still contorted into that scary one
He wiggles his fingers and makes an "Oooooo" sound before also walking off behind Jeff
They lose interest in you very quickly after realizing you won't give them a satisfactory reaction
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lune-redd · 8 months ago
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Hello, it's Lelly.
As you may know, I have recently deactivated my Twitter account. A lot of people are speculating I left because I was being harassed for drawing my older depiction of Bubbles from The Powerpuff Girls as chubby. However... that's not the direct reason I left. In fact, I didn't really see much of the comments of folks on there getting riled up about it as I muted the tweet the morning I saw that it blew up. I was only merely aware of it all by being told about it from friends, with there being some other users on the site making other really fuckin' stupid comments about my art.
This does however lead into why I actually left Twitter, and it's because of Twitter's overall toxic nature. Overtime, I've really gotten sick of how absolutely revolting Twitter has become to experience. The site is basically built around dunk culture and doom scrolling. You know that one tweet of someone making an example of Twitter's utter stupidity by using pancakes and waffles as an example?
I bring this up because I think this fits my point about how Twitter has this thing of assuming the absolute worst about the most insignificant things, even the most innocuous. The "Bubbles obesity" comments weren't the only stupid comments that came out of that post. I also got a quote retweet that I was "forcefully feminizing Buttercup", even though the whole fucking point of that drawing was to depict a usually tough character in an unusual situation for her. I have also gotten stupid comments on other drawings though, like the one where Mitch pushes Buttercup down for trying to look taller than she is and I got called a misogynist for it, though I'm pretty sure that one was bait (Twitter users have a tough time figuring out what is and isn't bait, it's dunk culture that I'm about to talk about really doesn't help this).
The site's dunk culture is also really fuckin' bad. Quote retweets are a disease, as unlike Tumblr's reblog comments, quote retweets count as a different post. Someone disagrees with you? Show your audience how stupid they are on your page! Hey, are you trying not to see the most abhorrent racist statement imaginable? Well TOO BAD FUCK YOU here's a le epic own giving them all the attention in the world even though one of the most common internet rules are DON'T FEED THE FUCKIN' TROLLS YOU IDIOT. Oh hey, are you trying to explain how you prefer a certain artistic choice over another in something you like? Well you're a deranged ungrateful whiny nitpicker, get owned!
I've seen so many of my friends be belittled for simply discussing their artistic preferences of things they're passionate about. I had a friend who said he prefers the original Crash Bandicoot design over his redesigned look in Crash 4, and had legitimate reasons for why he felt that way (even if he didn't really explain them clearly), and he got dunked for it which made me mad. I'm sick and tired of it all. The reaction to my art is only a mere example of the shit I despise about that site.
I had been planning on leaving Twitter for quite some time, as my follower count was growing nearer and nearer to 10K. I had planned on leaving after 10K followers because that amount was wayyyy too fuckin big for me to handle. I'm a young and growing lad, and I felt it wouldn't be good for my mental sanity to handle all that, so I dipped. The amount of attention I've been getting is simultaneously both wonderful and extremely overwhelming. Even the explosion of new followers and asks on here is quite the load! (Seriously, calm the fuck down y'all) I am very grateful for all the supportive asks I've gotten even though I won't be able to answer them all, thank you all so very much.
tl;dr I didn't leave Twitter because I was being harassed or anything, but rather because of the site's overall toxic and belittling environment.
Adios.
-Lelly
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dark-konohagakure2 · 4 months ago
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Sebastian and William t spears trying to one up each other using reader
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tw: noncon, double penetration, overstimulation, degradation, competition, size difference
All characters depicted are 18+
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William has a very strong distaste towards Sebastian and demons in general, one he will make well known, and while Sebastian isn't as verbal about it, the feeling is very mutual, in fact he'd want to wring the Reaper's neck if it wasn't for his young master's orders and William's death scythe. But even two bitter adversaries are allowed to have a bit of friendly competition.
At first William will scoff at the idea of engaging in such a frivolous game, especially with a demon, but Sebastian knows how to push people's buttons without letting his butler facade crack. Sebastian will tease William and taunt him for apparently being inexperienced in bed, and not wanting to be outdone by such a foul beast, he ends up caving.
It isn't easy for the demon butler to pick up a poor unsuspecting lady or servant girl with his good looks and charms, one who'd be naive enough to follow a stranger like him just because he's pretty, although he wouldn't pick anyone demonic, that would either turn William off completely or excite the reaper a bit too much at the prospect of dominating a member of a species he so despises.
Sebastian won't give up on his venomous taunts against William even when he's balls deep inside of the young woman's pussy alongside the reaper, delighting in his attempts to make the cold and professional man lose his unbreakable composure, at least slightly.
"Hmm~? Is something the matter, Mister Reaper~? If you keep going that slowly you'll never be able to make our little morsel cum, much less achieve climax yourself..."
William isn't going to allow himself to lose to a horrid demon of all things, even if it's at something as insignificant as bringing some helpless human girl to climax, his hips thrusting up in a mechanical movement as he fucks into her, his cock sliding lewdly against's Sebastian's inside of the tight and wet space they're sharing.
The sensation of getting fucked by two different yet very similar supernatural beings is too much for the poor girl, and it's a wonder that she can withstand the dual penetration without passing out from the overwhelming sensations coursing through her. Sebastian with tease her as much as his butler facade will allow, while William is almost completely silent the entire time, making a few low noises whenever he cums.
Sebastian isn't going to allow himself to be bested by William at something he himself is already very good at, he has more experience with human women, having slept with multiple of them for information or just for the pleasure of it on many different occasions, and being the suave demon he is, he knows exactly what filthy thing to whisper in her ear to make her weak in the knees.
William doesn't want to lose this little game either, while he isn't as rough, sadistic, or vocal as Sebastian, he's much more precise, having enough knowledge of the human body due to his line of work to hit all the right spots to leave her a writhing and whimpering mess between the two hellish creatures, that is until the barrage of sensations taking over her body becomes too much to bear.
"Humans are so pitifully feeble. I counted only five orgasms and you've already fallen unconscious, such pathetic endurance. Well, it seems as this has concluded in a draw, demon..."
They're both rather disappointed that they weren't able to reach a definitive conclusion on which one of them is superior in bed, but it's a minor setback, they aren't mortal beings like humans are, so they have all the time in the world to settle this petty little dispute they are having.
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gay-jesus-probably · 1 year ago
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I like the general fandom trend to just take the plot of Hyrule Warriors as a loose guideline at best and just use the whole concept as a good excuse to get blorbos to interact across timelines, BUT I'm very disappointed that everyone is missing the comedic potential of a very specific squad of characters:
Young Link (aka Mask), who walks out of the nightmare of Majora's Mask and immediately gets portal kidnapped into a temporal war, takes one look at the whole mess and decides that you could not fucking pay him to admit to being the resident expert on Time Shenanigans. He introduces himself with the title of Hero of Termina, and definitely doesn't have any other ones, that would be crazy. Hero of Time? Never heard of him.
Tetra, who is a kickass pirate captain with zero patience for people trying to shove her into the Designated Princess role, and realizes immediately that Oh Fuck, this Hyrule has a lot of Ideas about how the Hero and the Princess are supposed to properly play their parts, the second they realize she's technically a Zelda they're gonna shove her in a goddamn dress and damsel her again, that's not happening. So she's definitely just a really cool pirate captain, nothing else going on here at all, definitely not the heir of the Hylian royal family in her time, that'd be crazy.
Ravio, who is literally just a palette swapped Link, meaning that the second his hood comes off, things are gonna get Awkward. There's no way in hell he's dealing with all that Hero baggage, that's Link work, so that giant bunny hood/mask is practically superglued to his head, and he's not taking it off for love or money.
Spirit Tracks Zelda, who is just in the Phantom Armour the whole time, and passing herself off as just a friendly ghost posessing a suit of armour to help the Hero of Spirits. Of course she isn't Princess Zelda, that's ridiculous, if she were a Zelda then people would start getting really weird about her technically being dead, and boy does that ever sound like a whole Thing she doesn't want to deal with, so she can't possibly be Zelda, she's just a nice ghost knight. Also, her teenage grandma is here, and that's kinda weird, so it's easier to just not admit to being royalty and avoid that awkward conversation.
Finally there's Sheik, who is not the Princess Zelda of the era straight up abandoning her war torn country for months at a time so she can risk her life in extreme cosplay for no clear reason, but is instead the actual Sheik from Ocarina of Time, who just beat Ganondorf like a month ago and is still trying to process what the fuck to do now. Also, he's been pretending to be a boy since he was ten, and is realizing there's a pretty good chance that he isn't pretending anymore, so that's a whole other can of worms. But for the last seven years of his life, being Princess Zelda meant certain death, so he's not really inclined to introduce himself like when in a new and stressful situation (not to mention he might actually just not be a girl named Zelda anymore), so he automatically introduces himself as just Sheik the spooky ninja man, and fuck he's in too deep to back out now, looks like he's committing to the bit. If you think you sense the Triforce of Wisdom on him, no you don't.
Cue shenanigans as the five of them attempt to hide that they're all actually kind of A Big Deal. The group motto is "Nobody says shit", which is usually delivered as a frantic hiss whenever someone slips up. Just the reunion between Sheik and Mask alone would be absolutely buckwild given how they parted, and how they're both frantically pretending to Not be involved with each other. For added hilarity and/or drama, Sheik gives his semi-bullshit cover story of having just been a friend of the Hero of Time, then runs into said Hero of Time and they both have to desperately pretend not to know each other, because if anyone picks up on the mountain of baggage between them then Mask is busted, and he won't hesitate to drag Sheik down with him out of sheer spite. Not to mention the weird balance of Sheik being used to this Link being a teenager that's actually a small child, and now has to adjust to Link who is a small child that's actually a teenager.
Also, i really feel like we're all missing out on the comedy potential of Ganondorf recognizing Young Link on sight and the two of them immediately launching into a grudge match with some extremely personal and specific insults on both sides. Meanwhile literally everybody else is just standing there watching, trying to process the fact that out of every single person that's been pulled out of time, Ganondorf only has personal beef with a literal nine year old.
I just feel like we're all really sleeping on the potential for Shenanigans here. The whole thing is an absurd mess, why not have some fun with it?
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dinogoofymutated · 7 months ago
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SFW!Colossus/Fem!Reader
I've been infected with another fictional man the way in which I pumped this out was ridiculous. I happened to re watch the scene in the movies where the government breaks into the mansion and seeing Piotr act like a big brother/dad to all the kids really got to me. That and the Deadpool movies (even though I thinks he's a little stuffy in those.) I even rewatched the episode he had in the animated series so that I knew I would get his character right and DAMN ugh god I juts have a thing for big men with soft hearts. especially the ones who are family oriented.
ALSO HOLY SHIT TY FOR 600 FOLLOWERS???? when did yall get here???? I swear I was at like 48 two weeks ago lmao time flies when you're thirsty for the X men I guess!! TWs: None? No pronouns mentioned but I went ahead and labeled it as fem because it's basically about kids forcefully adopting you as their mom. Kids having night terrors mentioned.
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Can you imagine sort of just being adopted by the students at the mansion as mutant mom?? At that point you don't really get a choice. Like you start out being very patient with these kids and making sure to keep bandaids, burn cream, pain meds and all of that because one way or another something is gonna happen- and you want to be prepared.
And then you start making breakfast. I feel like normally they probably have a schedule for who has breakfast duty but if you wake up and can't go back to sleep and you take over no one really cares. More sleep for them!!
And then a few times turns into every morning. And you're setting out ketchup for one kids eggs and syrup for another ones hashbrowns- and making sure not to cook with nuts and make sure there's at least three different things on the table that are Kosher or gluten free. Keeping an eye on everyone as they come to get food and noting who did and did not make it to breakfast this morning so that you can make sure they eat later-
And one day you're waking up at 5am and getting ready for the day so you can go make breakfast like always, and you look in the mirror at some point and just realise, holy fuck, when did you become a parent?
It's such a regular thing for kids to call you mom at that point, a knowing how so many of them have come from rough backgrounds, it makes you really happy to know they find comfort in you and will come find you if they need comforting.
And then there's Piotr. Big, strong, Piotr. Piotr who wakes up before dawn and does chores around the mansion in the early morning air. You can take the man out of the farm, but you can't take the farm out of the man. He does the lawn care, chops wood, takes care of whatever animals that might need feeding, replaces the feed in the bird feeder.
Piotr who makes sure to stop by the kitchen to share a small cup of coffee with you before he does chores. Piotr who hangs Hummingbird feeders right outside the kitchen windows because you mentioned you missed the ones your grandmother used to hang. Just Piotr, being strong and masculine and an absolute sweetheart.
He reminds me of that one quote that heard somewhere about masculinity being about protecting femininity, not rejecting it??? That one!!!
Kids call him dad all the time, and even though yall aren't even together, you become the parents of the school. Scott and Jean?? Love them, but they don't have that same kind of parent energy.
It's such a regular thing for kids to find the two of you interacting one way or another. Someone woke up way too early and enters the kitchen to find yall during your coffee, and there's a sweet moment with yall telling them to go back to bed, or offering to make them a quick breakfast. Maybe if they're really young Piotr will offer to tuck them in. He might be really blunt when telling them there are no monsters, but will be a little more gentle when you set a hand on his arm and give him a bit of a look.
The kiddo asks for both of you to tuck them in and you obviously aren't going to refuse them. Which leads to everyone wanting both of you to tuck them in and soon enough you two are doing curfew checks instead of the professor.
It's becomes so regular for the students to treat you two as their parents, and no one actually believes it when they find out that no, you're not a couple. So, they do what kids do and try to get you two together.
First it starts with making sure you two are sat together during everything they can get away with. Then it moves on to things like mistletoe (out of season, Piotr mistook it as an accidental bloom made by one of the agrokinesis kids and took it down) and then more mischievous plans like telling one of you that the other needed help with one thing or another, knowing that either one of you would help out at the drop of a hat. Sureee, they were lying, but you two didn't know that. (most of the time)
The kids just want to see their parents happy and in love. There's nothing wrong with that, is there? It's not like You and Piotr hadn't been helplessly pining for the other the entire time anyway.
You sigh deeply once you finally sneak out of the dorm room, Piotr right behind you. The tall man takes extra care to shut the door very gently, making sure it clicks in place just as silently.
"I thought we were never going to get her to sleep." You whisper to him. One of the youngest girls attending the school had a rather difficult time with night terrors, and would struggle to fall asleep without being tucked in. When you and Piotr were doing curfew checks tonight, she was the only kiddo still awake, and she had practically begged both of you to stay with her untill she finally did fall asleep. It couldn't be just one of you, It had to be both. No matter how many rooms you both had to check tonight, you would never have left her shaken up in such a state. You just hadn't expected it to take an hour.
"Illyana had similar dreams as a little one. It takes time for children to overcome it." Piotr whispers back as you begin to walk down the hallway to check the rest of the rooms. Even when he whispers, his voice is strong and hard to keep quiet. You know there's truth to what he says, and yet you can't help but wish you could do something more to help her with her nightmares. You rub some warmth into your arms anxiously as you think about it, surprised when you feel the warm weight of Piotr's hand settle in between your shoulder blades.
"You're worrying again." He states, frowning slightly when you look up at him. You send him a resigned smile, before it quickly falls as you look away.
"I can't help it. I worry about all of them, her especially. They just... deserve so much more than their lot in life." You say. Piotr hums in response, his thumb brushing idly against your back.
"Their life like us, you mean? Mutants?" His question makes you wince.
"No. Yes? I don't know. I just... I just wish that we could give them more than... this." You say, waving your hands to motion about the mansion. "The school might very well be the only safe space they have their entire life. The world hasn't been kind to them, and I'm not sure it ever will be." Your words begin to quiet down as you finish the sentence, lowing to a whisper that only he can hear. You'd never, ever want any of these kids hear a word of what you're saying. Knowing that hope is really all they have at their age, and you of all people refuse to be the one to destroy that beautiful childlike optimism.
"That is what we are working for as the X-men, yes? To change that?" Piotr asks you point blank, his hand moving up towards the back of your neck in a soothing manner that still gives you goosebumps, feeling the comforting heat of his hand even stronger than before.
"Yeah, but..."
"Then we are doing all we can." He finishes, a smile on his face that's so determined and confident that it very nearly changes your mind completely. Nonetheless, it's a reassuring smile that makes your chest feel warm and fuzzy. You smile back at him finally, and you swear you see fondness in his eyes.
It doesn't take long before the two of you are finally at your door. You give Piotr a short and sweet goodnight as you begin to step inside, but he stops you before you go, gently catching hold of your arm. For the first time, you think you've seen him debate on his words. His mouth opens, but he doesn't speak at first, and you swear you see a blush rising to his cheeks as he does so.
"You'd make a good mother." He says eventually, and it makes you smile widely.
"You'd make a good dad." You tell him. There's silence between you as he brushes a stray lock of hair away from your face in a fond and caring manner, and you swear you could trick yourself into believing that you and Piotr were already in domestic bliss if this moment goes on for any longer. The tall man leans in, and you find your mind short circuiting as he presses a kiss to your forehead. The simple action somehow leaving you beyond flustered.
"Sleep well, Любовь моя. I will see you in the morning." Piotr tells you, before walking off at his regular stiff pace. You stand in your doorway for a minute, watching him leave with a bit of a confused smile on your face. Out of all the Russian nicknames he's called you in the past, you had never heard him say that one before. You wonder if you should pick up a book on the language as you close your door and finally crawl into bed, although part of you is content to leave it be. Colossus had always been blunt, and you're sure he'd tell you eventually. You fall asleep just as you always do, excited to see him when you wake up in the morning.
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doctorbitchcrxft · 10 months ago
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Pilot | Supernatural Series Rewrite | Dean Winchester x Reader
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader (Eventual)
Warnings: canon violence, canon gore
Word Count: 4833
A/N: This is gonna be the slowest of burns. Every Saturday, these will publish at 3:00 PM CDT! I hope you all enjoy. Taglist/Requests are open!!
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A trail of men disappearing spanning decades had brought you to Jericho, California. It seemed it would be a pretty standard hunt. From the moment you arrived, though, you knew this would be different.
You’d run into other hunters on jobs before, but none as strange and belligerent as John. John was all you knew him by. He was rough around the edges, and in all honesty, a complete dick. You had unintentionally gotten into an unspoken race with him to see who could finish the hunt first. Both of you refused to back off and go find another job; you just out of spite and him… you had no idea why a guy old enough to be your father was being so petty and territorial about this hunt. And perhaps that’s what fueled your fire to finish this hunt before John could. You thought maybe he knew something you didn’t about the hunt, and you were desperate to find out. But then… he disappeared. 
About a week into the “competition” you were having with John, he disappeared. You didn’t see him around Joseph Welch’s house, the Breckenridge Road home, or the Centennial Highway Bridge. It was completely puzzling. He didn’t seem like the type to up and leave in the middle of a job, but you brushed the unsettled feeling you had aside to keep pushing through your hunt. 
You had torched the body of Constance Welch the same night you guessed John left. You were just about to leave town, and then, Troy Squire ended up dead by what you assumed were Constance’s hands. 
You pulled up to the Centennial Highway Bridge in yet another stolen car. 
‘One of these days I won’t keep putting a neon sign on my back by stealing cars and actually find a way to buy one,’ you thought.
Almost as if on cue, another car pulled up next to yours. Except this car— a black 1967 Chevy Impala— was way nicer than the shitty sedan you’d copped for the time being. 
Two young men in the most layers you’ve ever seen anyone wear in the California sun stepped out on either side of the car. You pushed aside the thought of how attractive the shorter of the pair was and kept walking toward the taped-off part of the bridge where a few officers were milling around a crashed car. 
“Is that Troy’s? Oh, my God,” you shook your head, making sure the officers could hear you. 
“Ma’am, you are not supposed to be here,” an officer told you, trying to keep you from walking any closer to the car.
“I know, I know, I’m sorry, I just—” you sniffed, “—I’m his cousin. We were really close growing up, and I, uh, just had to see this for myself, um, do you have any idea what could’ve happened?”
“We were wondering the same thing,” a deep voice called from behind you, making you wheel around.
‘Fuck. The Impala dudes.’
“And who are you?” the officer you’d been speaking to asked.
“Federal marshals,” one said, flashing a badge.
‘Goddammit, more hunters.’ You held back an eye roll, doing your best to stay in character.
“You two are a little young for marshals, aren't you?”
The one you’d found attractive initially flashed a smile. “Thanks, that's awfully kind of you. You just had another one just like this, correct?”
The officer you’d been speaking to didn’t seem too convinced by their story, but replied anyway. “Yeah, that's right. About a mile up the road. There've been others before that.”
“Any connection between the victims, besides that they're all men?”
“No. Not so far as we can tell.”
“So, what's the theory?” the taller guy asked. 
“Honestly, we don't know. Serial murder? Kidnapping ring?” The officer seemed to remember you were standing there as he spoke. “Ma’am, I really do need you to go.”
“I was just about to—” you started, before the shorter guy cut you off. 
“What kinda crack police work are you doing; talking about sensitive information in front of townies?” He was cut off with a grunt; apparently the other guy had stepped on his foot. 
“Thank you for your time,” you told the officer, suddenly feeling very awkward. You turned on your heel, hurrying away. 
***
After the bizarre incident with the other two hunters on the bridge, you went down to a local diner to get something to eat. You were puzzled as to why Constance was still around after you torched her bones. You flipped through a few pages of your journal when you saw the two hunters from the bridge walking in with two goth chicks. 
‘What the fuck. First John, and now this.’
The shorter one of the pair caught the glare you threw their way over your shoulder. He had a smug look on his face you couldn’t quite read as he sat down in a booth with the girls and his partner. You did your best to listen in on their conversation as you sipped your drink. 
“I was on the phone with Troy. He was driving home. He said he would call me right back, and...he never did,” you heard one of the girls lament. 
You recognized the voice of the taller one. “He didn't say anything strange, or out of the ordinary?”
“No. Nothing I can remember.”
“I like your necklace.”
“Troy gave it to me. Mostly to scare my parents—” the girl laughed, “—with all that devil stuff.”
“Actually, it means just the opposite. A pentagram is protection against evil. Really powerful. I mean, if you believe in that kind of thing.”
“Okay. Thank you, Unsolved Mysteries,” the other guy’s voice broke in. 
You held back a small laugh. You hated to admit it, but he was pretty funny. 
“Here's the deal, ladies,” the pretty one said, “The way Troy disappeared, something's not right. So if you've heard anything… What is it?”
Your eyebrows drew together, your back still turned to the group.
“Well, it's just... I mean, with all these guys going missing, people talk,” a new voice chimed in. 
“What do they talk about?” the two boys said in unison.
It got a little harder to hear as one of the girls quieted her voice. “It's kind of this local legend. This one girl? She got murdered out on Centennial, like decades ago. Well, supposedly she's still out there. She hitchhikes, and whoever picks her up? Well, they disappear forever.”
‘Yeah, yeah, I already know that. They are way far behind me in the process.’
“Well, thank you for your time, ladies,” the voice of the taller one spoke amidst some rustling. You figured they were getting up to leave. 
You dropped a twenty on the table, let the door shut behind the group, and stood to follow the boys out. You hung back a little while you watched them head to their car. 
“I know you’re back there, sweetheart,” the pretty one called without turning around.
“I know you do. I was just testing you,” you said, walking closer. “Look, I’ve already got this one covered. You guys should find something else.”
“Not a chance,” the pretty boy replied. 
“Look, man—” you started. 
“We’re just looking for our dad,” the taller one cut you off. “We think he’s working this same job.”
“Wait, is your dad’s name John?” you asked, surprised. 
Both of them started toward you, their shock and confusion evident. “How do you—”
“Whoa, easy,” you giggled. “He was here a few days ago and then he just, pfft,” you imitated a puff of smoke, “disappeared.”
The pretty boy ran his hand through his hair, looking frustrated, while the taller guy continued talking to you. “Was he working with you?”
“Hardly,” you scoffed, “we were kind of in an unspoken competition to see who could smoke this bitch first when he disappeared. And then, Troy ended up dead a day later. I thought maybe he was connected to Troy’s death some kind of way.”
“I don’t think so,” the taller one answered. “I’m Sam, by the way. This is my brother, Dean.”
“Nice to meet you. I’m (Y/N),” you shook Sam’s hand. When you reached for Dean’s, though, he rolled his eyes at you without taking it. 
“Oh-kay,” you muttered. 
“Sorry about him,” Sam told you. “He’s—”
“A bit touchy?” you smirked.
“Yeah,” Sam laughed. 
“I can hear you two, y’know,” Dean snarked. 
“I know,” you quipped. “So, what’s your theory on your dad?”
“We have no idea,” Sam said. “We were hoping you might know.”
“I have nothing for you,” you shook your head. 
“Well, do you know anything about the case?” 
“A lot, actually. Chick’s name is Constance Welch. She’s a woman in white. She lives at the end of Breckenridge Road. I talked to her husband, and he definitely cheated on her. He buried her in a plot behind her house. I went there and torched her. I was just about to leave town when your dad disappeared, Troy wound up dead, and you two showed up.”
“Then, there’s gotta be something else keeping her here,” Sam told you.
“Okay, then what?”
***
“So this is where Constance took the swan dive,” Dean said. The three of you looked over the railing of the Centennial Highway Bridge. Sam had been nice enough to force his brother to let you tag along. 
“Okay, so now what?” Sam asked.
“Now we keep digging until we find Dad. Might take a while,” Dean responded.
“Dean, I told you, I've gotta get back by Monday—”
“What’s Monday?” you asked. 
“I’ve got an interview with law school.”
“Oh, shit, no way!” you smiled. 
Sam smiled back at you before Dean cut in. “Yeah, I forgot. You're really serious about this, aren't you? You think you're just going to become some lawyer? Marry your girl?”
“Maybe. Why not?” Sam cut back.
“Does Jessica know the truth about you? I mean, does she know about the things you've done?”
“No, and she's not ever going to know.”
“Well, that's healthy. You can pretend all you want, Sammy. But sooner or later you're going to have to face up to who you really are.” Dean kept walking down the bridge. 
“And who's that?”
“You're one of us,” Dean said. 
Sam hurried around him. “No. I'm not like you. This is not going to be my life.”
You felt really awkward doing what felt like intruding on a private moment. Your eyes began to scan the railing of the bridge opposite you.
“You have a responsibility to—”
Sam cut his brother off. “To Dad? And his crusade? If it weren't for pictures I wouldn't even know what Mom looks like. And what difference would it make? Even if we do find the thing that killed her, Mom's gone. And she isn't coming back.”
You were doing your best not to listen in on their conversation when Dean grabbed his brother by the collar and shoved him against the bridge railing.
“Uh, guys—” you started, your eye caught by what looked like Constance standing on the railing of the bridge.
“Don't talk about her like that,” Dean grumbled at his brother; ignoring you.
“Guys!” 
“What?!” Dean turned to face you, stopping when he caught sight of Constance. Constance then stepped off the railing. 
The three of you broke off in a sprint toward the spot she’d leapt off. You searched the water below. “Where'd she go?”
“No idea,” Dean answered. 
Your visual search was interrupted by a bright light coming on in the corner of your eye. Dean’s Impala’s headlights. 
“What the fuck—” Dean trailed off.
“Who's driving your car?” you asked him. 
He responded by pulling the keys out of his pocket and jingling them. 
“Oh.”
The car jerked to life, heading straight for you and the boys. You broke into a sprint yet again, doing your best to outrun the car; a task that proved impossible. 
“Jump!” you screamed, and the three of you threw yourselves over the side of the bridge. You thankfully caught a bit of the bridge that jutted out over the water and pulled yourself back up, groaning.
‘My arm’s gonna be sore as a bitch in the morning.’
“Dean?” Sam yelled down to the water below. “Dean!”
“What?” came his aggravated response. 
You looked down to see a mud-covered Dean crawling out of the water. You couldn’t hold back a laugh upon seeing him.
“Not funny, sweetheart,” he called up to you.
“My name’s (Y/N),” you answered. “Don’t call me sweetheart. It weirds me out.”
“Sure thing, sweetheart.”
“Guys, you can argue later. You okay?” Sam called down to Dean.
“I’m super,” his brother responded.
You and Sam climbed back over the railing of the bridge while Dean made his way up to you. The car had stopped only a few inches from where the three of you dove over. Dean busied himself inspecting the engine while you sat with your back leaned against the passenger’s side door. 
“Your car okay?” Sam asked. 
“Yeah, whatever she did to it, seems all right now.” Dean shut the hood. “That Constance chick, what a bitch!”
You chuckled to yourself at his antics. “Alright, well, I don’t think the bridge is what’s tying her here. What now?”
Dean raised his hands in frustration, flicking mud off his hands in the process. 
Sam caught a whiff of his brother. “You smell like a toilet.”
***
Your next stop was a motel. When you went to check in, the clerk informed Dean that another man under the last name on Dean’s card had bought out a room for the whole month. And so, you and the boys went poking around John’s room. 
Every surface was covered in newspaper clippings, magazine articles, photos, hastily scribbled notes, and bits of red tape tying some of them together. 
“I knew John was weird, but this is a whole new level,” you commented, slightly in awe of the frantic scribblings covering the wall. 
‘'Don’t talk about him like that,” Dean grumbled. “I'm gonna get cleaned up.” He started toward the shower. 
“Hey, Dean?” Sam stopped him.
His brother turned around. 
“What I said earlier, about Mom and Dad, I'm sorry—”
Dean held up a hand, cutting him off. “No chick-flick moments.”
Sam laughed. “Alright, jerk.”
“Bitch.”
“You guys are strange.”
Dean rolled his eyes at you before disappearing into the bathroom. 
You started looking around John’s room. A closer look at the walls of information revealed pages on demons, witches, possession, and other bits of newspaper referring to mysterious deaths unlike anything you’d heard before. One was an obituary clipping from 1983; taking you aback. The picture was of a gorgeous blonde woman named Mary Winchester who died in a house fire. Her picture was surrounded by other house fire deaths and linked by red thread to multiple of the demon and witch articles. You walked over to his dresser where there was a picture of a much younger John holding two boys who you assumed were Sam and Dean. 
“You guys were cute kids,” you told Sam, showing him the picture.
He smiled sadly at it. 
After a brief melancholy pause, you spoke up. “So, what’s your deal? College? Law school? Part-time hunter? That doesn’t add up.”
“My, uh, my dad raised us as hunters after my mom passed,” he explained. 
���I’m sorry,” you told him, sitting on the bed next to him. “Was her death the reason your dad became a hunter?”
“Yeah. I’m not exactly sure what happened; I wasn’t even a year old yet. Dean remembers way more than I do, but he said our dad was never the same. Anyway, two years ago, dad and I got into a fight. I wanted to go to school, and he wanted me to stay and hunt. So I left.”
“Dean said you got a girl now? Was that the voicemail you were listening to a few minutes ago?”
“Yeah, actually. Jess. She’s— she’s amazing. I’m excited to get back to her.” You could see how much he loved her just in how his face lit up talking about her.
“I’m sure you are,” you smiled. 
“So, what about you? What’s your story?” he nudged your shoulder with his. 
“Meh, not much to tell.”
“Aw, come on—” Sam rebutted. 
“I’m serious!” you laughed. “I’ve just always hunted. Never knew anything different.”
“I know that’s difficult.” His tone became serious again. 
“Nah, it’s not so bad. I enjoy it. Brings me a little peace, y’know?” you shrugged.
“You sound like Dean.”
“Speaking of which, he’s taking forever and a day in the shower,” you joked. You bounced over to the bathroom door, leaning your ear on it about to knock. “Hey, princess—” 
You were cut off by the door opening and stumbled into Dean’s chest. 
He caught you by the shoulders. “You were saying?” 
You shoved off him, annoyed by his smug smile and quirked eyebrow. “Sorry.”
“Anyway,” Dean began, “I'm starving, I'm gonna grab a little something to eat in that diner down the street. You want anything?”
“No,” Sam said.
“A burger would be great,” you told him. 
“Wasn’t asking you,” Dean said. 
You stuck your tongue out at him. “Aframian’s buying, anyway, so what difference is it to you?”
“Nothing, it’s just fun to rile you up.” He winked and smiled at you, amused at your aggravated expression before closing the door behind him. 
You shook your head. “Dick.”
Sam laughed. “You get used to him.” He went back to his phone, relistening to his girlfriend’s voicemail. He furrowed his brows before pressing it to his ear. “What?” He stands up, catching your attention. “What about you?” He huffed when he hung up the phone, rushing over to the closed curtains to peek out. 
“What, what is it?” You crossed your arms.
“Police got Dean. We need to leave.”
“Shit.”
Sam quickly pulled away from the window which you understood meant you had company. You hid under the bed, anxiously waiting to see the officer’s boots make their way into the bathroom. You began scooching yourself out from under the bed frame, and when he’d slammed the door to the bathroom open, you and Sam snuck out of the room. Thankfully, Sam had Dean’s keys, and the two of you sped away from the motel in Dean’s Impala.
“Well, shit,” you breathed, your heart still beating quickly.
Sam huffed out a laugh, still recovering from the adrenaline.
***
You and Sam were headed to Breckenridge Road to hopefully figure out how to stop Constance. Since you had torched the body, then maybe something in her house was keeping her alive. 
After Dean’s arrest, the two of you were intent on getting Dean and getting the hell out of Jericho before anyone else had a run-in with the cops. 
Sam’s phone rang, and he answered quickly. “Hello?” He tossed a look your way. “Actually, it was (Y/N)’s idea.” You had no doubt he was referring to the fake shooting you’d called in to the police department so Dean had an opportunity to escape. You motioned for him to give you the phone.
“You’re welcome, by the way,” you told him once you had the phone to your ear. 
“Yeah, whatever, sweetheart,” Dean’s gruff voice responded.
“I told you not to call me that.”
“And I’ve made it pretty clear I’m not going to listen. Hey, give the phone back to Sam. I gotta talk to him.”
“And why can’t you tell me? Don’t you trust me? I’m offended, babe,” you quipped. 
“Don’t objectify me.”
“Hey, you started it with the whole ‘sweetheart’ thing.”
“C’mon, (Y/N), give him the—”
“Shit!” you screamed, dropping the phone as the car came to a screeching halt. “What the hell, Sam?”
“Constance,” he replied coolly. He kept a level head despite the tense situation. 
You looked up at the rearview mirror to see her in the backseat. “Fuck.” 
Constance’s hauntingly beautiful voice melodically flowed from the backseat. “Take me home.”
“No,” Sam answered. 
You saw her glare as the doors started to lock themselves. You whipped around to start trying to reopen them. The car began jerking forward. 
“What the hell, Sam? Stop!” you told him. 
“It’s not me.”
You looked over to see him holding his hands up. The steering wheel was moving itself. You turned back to the door, struggling to get the lock open. Eventually, you wound up at Constance’s abandoned Breckenridge Road house. The car’s rumble quieted and the headlights turned off. 
“Don't do this,” Sam pleaded, still holding his hands up. 
The ghost flickered, sounding sad. “I can never go home.”
‘That’s it.’
“You're scared to go home,” you realized. When you turned around to look at her, she had disappeared. Before you could even turn back around, you felt the bench seat reclining forcefully. 
“Sam!” 
Constance sat atop him, begging him to hold her. 
“You can't kill me. I'm not unfaithful. I've never been!”
“You will be,” she hummed. “Just hold me.”
You fumbled for your gun hidden under your top. Before you could fully aim at her, you felt your back make brief contact with the Impala’s door before flying through the air. You barely registered Sam yelling your name as you groaned in pain on the dead grass beneath you. 
You rolled around, trying to regain your wits and recover when you heard the sound of multiple gunshots. 
“Sam!”
“It’s me, (Y/N), stay down!” Dean yelled. 
Suddenly, Dean’s car burst through the front of the abandoned house. You pushed yourself up off the ground; your joints and back aching in protest. 
“Sam! Sam! You okay?” Dean called after the car. 
‘I’m fine, Dean, thanks for asking,’ you thought. 
The two of you climbed over the rubble to the passenger’s side window. 
“I think,” Sam responded weakly. 
“Can you move?” you asked.
“Yeah. Help me?” He reached out to his brother. 
Dean pulled Sam through the window of the car. “There you go.”
You turned to see Constance looking sadly at a picture she was holding before slamming it to the floor. She glared at the three of you harshly, forcing a bureau across the floor to pin you to Dean’s car. 
You groaned in pain once again as Dean struggled to push the furniture off. You stopped your struggle at the lights flickering and the sound of water rushing down the stairs. 
“You've come home to us, Mommy,” the echoey voices of Constance’s children sang. They appeared behind her, hugging her as she screamed. In a surge of energy, Constance and her children began melting to the floor. Constance’s resounding scream seemed to get louder and louder with each passing moment, the flickering of the lights becoming more and more intense. You squeezed your eyes shut until the screaming subsided, suddenly feeling the pressure on your stomach relieved. All that was left of Constance and her children was a puddle of murky water on the floor. 
“So this is where she drowned her kids,” Dean said while you rubbed your stomach, recovering from the pressure of the bureau. 
Sam nodded. “That's why she could never go home. She was too scared to face them.”
“You found her weak spot. Nice work, Sammy.” Dean slapped his brother on the chest where he’d been injured by Constance.
Sam laughed despite the pain. “Yeah, I wish I could say the same for you. What were you thinking shooting Casper in the face, you freak?”
“Hey. Saved your ass,” Dean commented, starting to look over his beloved Impala. “I'll tell you another thing. If you screwed up my car? I'll kill you.” 
You giggled at Sam and Dean’s banter. Sam and Dean started to get back into the car, and you idled awkwardly. 
“Whatcha doin’? Let’s go.” Sam looked at you expectantly. 
“Go where?” you asked, feeling stupid. 
“I think we make a pretty solid team. You should tag along.”
“What?” Dean asked while you started shaking your head. 
“No, no, I shouldn’t—” 
“You should. I’m going back to school, and I know Dean’s gonna be lost without me trying to find my dad.”
A slow smile crossed your face. “Thank you. That’d be nice, actually.”
Dean rolled his eyes, but didn’t say anything to the contrary. And with that, the three of you set off to drop Sam back off at college. 
***
The thing Dean so desperately wanted to tell Sam that he couldn’t tell you earlier was that his dad had left coordinates to a place called Blackwater Ridge, Colorado in the journal he’d left behind in Jericho. John was getting weirder and weirder by the minute. 
“AC/DC. I like it,” you said from the backseat. 
“Thanks.” Dean cracked what seemed like a genuine, lopsided smile at you for the first time in the rearview mirror. “Sam thinks it’s mullet rock.”
“Yeah, well, it’s better than Kiss and Poison.”
“True that.” Despite the fact that he was agreeing with you about something as mundane as music, his tone was still guarded.
“How far is Blackwater Ridge?” you asked Sam, who was looking over a map. 
“About 600 miles,” he answered.
“Hey, if we shag ass we could make it by morning,” Dean cut in. 
Sam suddenly looked uncomfortable. “Dean, I, um…”
The older brother deflated. “You're not going.”
“The interview's in like, ten hours. I gotta be there,” Sam tried to reason.
Dean nodded, disappointed, and returned his attention to the road. “Yeah. Yeah, whatever. I'll take you home.”
The mood in the car had turned tense, awkward, and sour, and remained that way for the rest of the drive back to Sam’s college.
“Dude, you go to Stanford?” you asked incredulously.
“Yeah,” he nodded, sheepishly.
“Alright, smartass, look at you.” You nudged his shoulder with your balled fist. 
Dean rolled to a stop in front of Sam’s apartment complex. 
You and Sam got out of the car. You gave him a quick hug goodbye before climbing down into the front seat. 
Sam leaned into your rolled-down window. “Call me if you find him?”
Dean nodded. 
“And maybe I can meet up with you later, huh?”
Despite Sam’s chipper tone, Dean’s disappointment was clear. “Yeah, all right.”
Sam patted the car door twice before turning away. 
“Sam?” Dean called before his brother could get too far. “You know, we made a hell of a team back there.” 
You felt a pang in your heart at Dean’s indirect attempt to try to convince Sam to stay. 
Sam nodded with a half-hearted smile. “Yeah.” 
Dean then began to drive off. 
The two of you didn’t get any more than five minutes down the road before you felt something was off. You could no longer hear the steady ticking of Dean’s watch breaking through the almost awkward silence. Sure enough, when you looked over at the wrist he had perched atop the steering wheel, the watch was stopped. 
“Dean,” you said. You tapped his watch’s face with your fingernail. 
He matched your worried glance, immediately turning the car around.
The car had barely stopped before you and Dean were leaping into action. You let Dean take the lead in rushing up to Sam’s apartment. 
Dean kicked the door to the apartment open, calling out to his brother in the process. You gasped when you caught sight of flames licking at the ceiling coming out from what you assumed was Sam’s bedroom. 
You heard Sam’s voice weakly calling his girlfriend’s name as you rushed to get him out of the smoldering room. You just barely caught sight of a body bleeding from the stomach burning on the ceiling before you and Dean dragged a screaming Sam out of his bedroom and away from the fire. You fought him every step of the way out of his apartment complex. 
It didn’t take long for the fire department to show up and the police to start asking questions. A small crowd had gathered to gawk at Sam’s smoldering apartment. Your face was steely as you watched the firefighters carry Jess out in a body bag. You and Dean took the brunt of the questions the police had, allowing Sam as much space as he needed. 
You and Dean soon headed over to the Impala where Sam was packing up the weapons cavity of the trunk. Both of you seemed too scared to ask Sam what was running through his head, and neither of you had any idea what to say. 
Sam threw a shotgun into the weapons box before muttering, “We got work to do,” and slamming the trunk shut.
You threw a look at Dean, who shook his head in response. Biting the inside of your cheek, you followed the boys into the car. As the three of you left Sam’s apartment in the rearview mirror, you realized the course of your formerly relatively boring life was changing very quickly. 
‘Damn you, John. Wherever you are.’
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followerofmercy · 9 months ago
Text
I think Freminet has some of the most interesting dissonance in his self perception of any Genshin character.
Like, of the Hearthlings we know, he's one of the most emotionally mature and intelligent. Lynette might still have him beat, but after playing her hangout... I dunno. I think they're tied. Lyney is Crumbling, Alrecchino is. Well. Arlecchino. Everyone else is a deeply traumatized child or adult and Freminet seems to pretty regularly be people's emotional support. His character stories talk about getting his vision by saving a bunch of other kids on a dive that went bad. The Selkie event literally had him being a therapist for a grownass woman, citing his past experiences with all the other Hearthlings that have died or killed themselves. And he handled that situation WELL. Yeah, he seems to live in a fantasy, but goddamn he's alive and a lot of people in his position aren't so clearly something is working.
Either his or Lyney's character story talks about the time Freminet had reached out to Lyney to try to ease his burdens, which resulted in Lyney blowing up at him. That probably contributed to Freminet thinking he's not good at it, but I think the reason Lyney reacted so badly was BECAUSE Freminet is actually a good support. He can't allow himself that from the little brother he's supposed to protect.
Freminet seems to both cry and dissociate often, but like... Kiddo you are in fact the only person in this family actually processing your emotions. Lynette dissociates 24/7. Arlecchino. Lyney lies and tells everyone he's fine and would literally rather die than admit otherwise. In comparison, Freminet is doing FANTASTIC
Freminet also gets a lot out of helping people! Like anyone, he needs to feel useful and needed. He seems to be an excellent mentor to the younger Hearthlings and perfectly competent on his own, but when you put him in a room with Lyney and Lynette who baby him and insist that THEY take care of HIM, he withdraws into himself.
Like, Freminet by himself feels like a young man and Freminet with the magician twins feels like a teenager. I have no idea how old he actually is. Logically, he would be OLDER than them! He's been with the House much, much longer and his experience shows. I think it's fascinating that they love him SO MUCH and yet, they just Cannot let him help them. Which is hurting him.
(Lynette is much better about not babying him and that is probably why their relationship is so much better than Freminet and Lyney's. Also why she keeps having to mediate between them. Because Lyney charges off trying to Fix Everything and that just makes Freminet feel useless and he doesn't want to get in the way and- you get the point)
Idk. It's hard to tell what things the previous director said to him vs what Arlecchino has said to him. I'm inclined to think our Arlecchino was the one that said he cries too much, but in a "crying in front of your enemies will get you killed" way and she herself is too fucked up to realize how "you cry too much" could be damaging.
Also I try not to consider gameplay stuff when it comes to story, but Freminet also has some of the most BRUTAL animations. He SMASHES HIS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT METAL PENGUIN INTO HIS ENEMY'S FACE. He doesn't think he's the most amazing fighter, and by Fatui standards he probably isn't, but he is winning fights against most grown men.
Tldr Freminet thinks he cries too much and is a burden and isn't good at helping people when he's actually the most mentally stable Hearthling send tweet
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iiseult · 7 months ago
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hey ik you have a lot of requests rn but could i get a King Baldwin NSFW alphabet at some point? thxx
Nsfw Alphabet: Baldwin iv x reader (drabble (?))
Note: I feel like writing smut about him is gonna get me sent to hell but fuck it we ball! Also I know everyone is about to be real mad at me for not focusing on high noon sunlight but I'm annoying so I need to write short drabbles and stuff like this first to help me flesh out his character
CWs → smut, leprosy, general cringe, AFAB reader, historical inaccuracies
A = aftercare (what they're like after sex)
• He would immediately fetch something to clean the two of you up. He wants to make sure you're comfortable and ready to turn in for the night, because you're not going anywhere now.
• He needs you to stay with him and talk, so he can be sure you are a real person really love him as much as he loves you. Finding someone like you, who's willing to love him both emotionally and physically, was hard enough. There's no way he'll ever let you go now.
• He likes falling asleep to the sound of you reading to him. Since he usually doesn't allow for much cuddling for fear of infecting you, it's enough to be lulled to sleep by your pretty voice.
• If he does break down and let you cuddle, he prefers to be the little spoon as the two of you fall asleep. He craves the feeling of your face pressed into the crook of his neck, your warm breath tickling his ear.
B = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)
• He doesn't have very high self esteem, and there aren't many parts of his body he'd say he "likes," per se, but the most tolerable to him is his chest. It's the largest part of his body unaffected by rash or sores.
• Since he is somewhat athletic, what with all the horseback riding and sword fighting, he is well-toned. His chest is sturdy and broad, perfect for resting your head on (or bite if you’re freaky like that 😛)
• His favorite part of your body is either your waist or your hips. He doesn't often get possessive (mostly because he doesn't feel worthy of possessing you), but holding you by your hips is the most intimate thing he can imagine. Feeling your curves with his own two hands and sliding his fingers over your supple skin until they come to rest around your waist is his subtle, gentle way of telling you who you belong to. And his hands are large enough that his fingertips almost touch when he holds you around the middle.
C = cum (anything to do with cum)
• He's afraid of his cum touching you. He worries it will somehow infect you or render you infertile, since many people still believed leprosy to be an STD. Therefore, he always pulls out and does his best to clean you up, should you come into contact with it. To him, you are so pure that he simply can't risk soiling you. He doesn't mind pulling out even though it can be so tempting to release inside of you, because no earthly pleasure is worth compromising your health.
• On the other hand, he doesn't mind your cum at all. He found it fascinating the first few hundred times; proof that you were genuinely feeling pleasure by his own hand.
• He would admire the glossy shine dripping from his fingers and then taste it slowly, no matter how flustered it made you. He doesn't find it unsanitary at all, like some men do. Plus, you always taste so good.
D = dirty secret
• As much as he would like to deny it, Baldwin is just like any other man, and he experiences sexual urges from time to time. Since he's so young and has been repressing himself for so long, it doesn't take much to turn him on.
• All you have to do is look at him the right way. Or any way, really. Your eyes alone are enough.
• The smell of your perfume does it, too. It's almost like a pavlovian response. If you spray some on his pillow or his clothes while you’re away, he’ll go insane, plagued by incessant thoughts of you that can only be held at bay by finishing himself off.
• Also, he wishes he could get you pregnant so fucking bad even though he knows it can’t happen. But if he had one magic wish, he would ask to be able to raise a child with you for as long as he can.
E = experience (how much experience/skill they have)
• Literally zero. He’s never had any sexual experiences with anyone else, and what he’s done with you is already far more than he ever expected. Everything he knows, you learned together. On the bright side, that means you can teach him to do everything exactly the way you like it.
• After a bit of time together, he’ll develop the necessary skills and become a very generous, devoted partner. Granted, you’ll have to show him what to do at first, and how to make you feel good, but he’s a smart man, and he’ll catch on quickly. After a simple demonstration and a few questions, he’ll start acting of his own accord.
• What he wants above all else is to please you; his own pleasure is a secondary concern. This may stem partially from his physical insecurities, and the fact that he couldn’t imagine anyone else touching him for so long. But it’s also because he loves you.
F = favorite position
• Cowgirl. He prefers to be on the bottom because it’s not as strenuous, but rest assured, he still contributes plenty. His absolute favorite is when you sit on his lap so he can put his face in your chest and grab your ass while you ride him. Usually it becomes more him thrusting up into you as you get tired of bouncing.
• This position also allows him to look up into your beautiful eyes as he penetrates you, which is often the final nail in the coffin for him. As soon as you gaze down at him with your messy hair framing your face so nicely, he feels himself twitch and has to pull out quickly, releasing hot ropes of cum onto your ass.
G = goofy (are they more serious or silly in the moment)
• Serious. He’s very romantic, and every single time, he reminds you how much he loves you. His feelings for you are not something he takes lightly. Additionally, he believes sex is a somewhat sacred act you should only ever share with your wife or husband, so it’s special to him every single time.
H = hair (how well groomed they are)
• He has pubic hair, but it’s soft, blond, and not very noticeable. Of course he’s always very clean and freshly washed, and often he will plan to bathe and apply fresh bandages to his body before spending the night with you.
I = intimacy (what are they like romantically in the moment)
• It’s unsurprising that he’s extremely sweet and loving during sex, since he’s like that normally, but it becomes even more pronounced. He just wants to be close to you.
• His favorite feeling is when he completely bottoms out and can feel his tip kissing your cervix. He loves burying his cock as deep inside you as possible and then holding that position, as strenuous as it may be, letting you feel every tiny twitch and pulse.
J = jack off
• After so many years of pent up sexual energy, it’s hard to close the floodgates once you open them. On nights when you sleep in separate bedchambers or are not together for some reason, it’s pretty much guaranteed that he’ll be fisting his cock for hours to the thought of you. Sometimes he’ll even practice using a pillow.
• Every single time he’ll feel guilty and embarrassed, trying to get it over with as quickly as possible, but it’s never enough. As soon as he felt you for the first time, felt himself sinking into you as your tight pussy stretched and squeezed him like nothing else ever had, it was the only thing he wanted for the rest of his life. The initial shock of pushing his swollen cock between your walls always draws a gasp from his lips, and it can’t be replicated, no matter how hard he tries.
K = kink
• Praise kink. Definitely. Especially when it’s about his appearance. He’d never heard a woman speak about being sexually attracted to him before you, and had always assumed they found him abhorrent. Actually, he’d grown accustomed to it and stopped being bothered by it at a certain point. So, every time you tell him what a pretty boy he is, it catches his off guard and makes his stomach erupt into butterflies.
• Complimenting his broad shoulders or tracing his abs with your delicate fingertips makes him blush so bad you can practically see steam coming from his ears. His eyes cloud over and he’s honestly one “good boy” away from actually drooling. ‘Cause he only really wants to make you feel good, and hearing the proof is the best reward.
• Hearing your moans also counts as part of this because it makes him feel strong and confident.
L = location (favorite place to do it)
• Bed, duh! Where else is fit for his queen?
M = motivation (what turns them on)
• Kisses. Even if they’re innocent. Even if you kiss him on the cheek because you’re in public and can’t do anything more. God forbid you kiss him anywhere else. Immediately, he gets hard.
• Kiss his neck and he’ll melt into jello in your hands.
• Kiss his collarbones and he’ll start getting a little desperate, grabbing you anywhere he can and rutting his hips into you.
• Kiss his hipbones and he’ll beg you to stop teasing and just touch him where he needs you, ‘cause it hurts too bad.
• Kiss his inner thighs and he might even whine. He’s used to getting whatever he wants, and teasing makes him so deliciously frustrated.
N = no (something they wouldn't do)
• He’s pretty vanilla, so most kinky things would probably be a no for him, but degradation is especially offensive, especially when it’s him degrading you. He hates the idea of speaking ill about you, his precious wife, the absolute love of his life, the woman he was head over heels for the second he met you. It wouldn’t make sense to whisper anything other than sweet nothings to you.
• He also wouldn’t enjoy being degraded. Even if he logically knows it’s all an act, it would get to him. He doubts himself and his sexual skills a lot since he doesn’t have the same physical abilities as other men, and hearing anything that might confirm his doubts, serious or not, turns him off. It makes him wilt like a sad flower. ☹️ Don’t you love him?
O = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill)
• He prefers giving! He thinks you taste like candy and loves hearing your desperate moans as he laps at your clit. He doesn’t mind at all when you start squirming and basically fucking his face. Anything for his princes, or, more accurately, his queen.
• He loves it when you finally cum and drench his entire face and chin. He’ll make you watch as he licks his lips.
P = pace (fast or slow? gentle or rough?)
• Slow and gentle, but deep and effective. He takes his sweet time with you, closing his eyes and allowing his body to do what comes natural.
• His touch is so soft and feather-light when he caresses your chest and thighs. He always treats you like glass.
• Every stroke is an intentional, fluid motion, never choppy or rushed.
• He kisses you softly the entire time, pressing his pillowy lips all over your bare chest and neck. And to your own lips, of course.
• Sometimes he holds your hand.
Q = quickie (their opinion on quickies, how often)
• He doesn’t know what that is, nor would he ever participate in one. Sex is meant to be fully enjoyed in private, in his opinion.
• Every time you sleep together, he pulls out all the stops, setting the entire evening aside to prepare. He makes sure the bed is clean and decorated with plenty of plush pillows and blankets, lights extra candles, draws the curtains, sends away the servants, and messes with his hair in front of the mirror until it looks satisfactory.
R = risk (do they experiment?)
• To an extent. He has definite boundaries that he will not cross, but if something sounds like it aligns with them, he’ll be eager to give it a try. It wasn’t so long ago he was being taught how to fuck, which was somewhat of an experiment itself.
S = stamina
• He doesn’t get overstimulated very easily and can go for pretty much as many rounds as you want. He barely even needs to stop between them, his refractory period is super short. Basically, as long as you’re in front of him, he’s hard. It’s literally so cute how much he loves you and your body.
T = toys
• It’s literally the dark ages baby we ZONT have that
U = unfair (how much they like to tease)
• Sometimes when he’s eating you out he likes to hold your hips flush to the mattress with his hands, not letting you buck against his face and effectively edging you. He thinks it’s cute to watch you get frustrated and whine his name. If you do, he’ll raise and eyebrow and ask what you want, pretending like he was born yesterday and doesn’t know good and well that you want his warm tongue back on your throbbing pussy.
• The teasing can’t last too long, though, because he’s a big softie and can’t stand being anything other than completely gentle with you for long periods of time. <3
V = volume (how loud are they, what sounds do they make)
• Not too loud volume-wise. Lots of soft, quiet grunts in that smooth voice of his. If something you do catches him by surprise, he lets out a little yelp, which is more high-pitched and breathy. When he cums, it draws a long, rumbling moan from deep within his chest, and leaves him breathing heavily. While he fucks you, he lets out little puffs of air.
• If you tease him enough, he’ll get desperate and whine a little, but it’s pretty rare.
W = wild card (random hc)
• He’d be an ass man for sure. Not that he doesn’t enjoy your tits, too. He just has a weak spot for a nice ass. Yours just fills up his hands so perfectly that he can’t help but cup it in his palms and massage gently. If you’re laying on your stomach, he plays with it sometimes, fascinated by the way it jiggles when he nudges it.
X = x-ray (what's going on under their clothes)
• It’s big. Like, 8 inches and just girthy enough that your fingers can touch when you wrap your hand around it. He doesn’t know what to do with all that, honestly. He knows it’s kind of big and it actually embarasses him.
Y = yearning (how high is their sex drive)
• Oh baby it’s bad. He wants you. You’re the only one he wants. Every time he sees you he gets little hearts in his eyes and has to bite his lip to stop the impure thoughts that are plaguing his mind from taking over.
Z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep after)
• Not too fast, usually you have to read to him or rub his back for awhile before he sleeps. Even though his body is physically very relaxed after releasing all that tension, his mind is still going a mile a minute. He has a lot to worry about as king, and putting those thoughts to bed is sometimes easier said than done. Thankfully he has you to help him out.
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nekropsii · 9 months ago
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What a about Caliborn makes him so cool in your opinion?
Go keep track of his progression as an artist alongside his development as a character and think about how these are intrinsically linked. Ponder the fact that he is both at his most obnoxious and at his most amateur when trying to ignore his unique style explicitly brought on by his canonical learning disability and mimic others rather than truly be himself. Consider how his explorations of art are genuinely cool, not a bad thing, and how we get some really neat multimedia stuff out of it.
Caliborn may be a shitty little teenage wretch but the way he is portrayed as an artist and as a disabled person is both really good and very real. It comes from a place of love. His learning disability is handled with a degree of gentle care that you would not really expect from Hussie. The place Caliborn's art style ends up in is so fucking sick and I actually unironically love it. The technique he uses is really interesting. It's intentionally reminiscent of an Etch-a-Sketch, and I'm a little obsessed with it.
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This is so fucking good. I mean this seriously. He's right - that is some Pure Art Skill.
I just love the way art is employed as a necessary component of his character arc. It's so neat. You don't see visual cues that intricate too often. Usually it's just in character design, but watching his entire art style and even his medium of choice change several times over is fascinating. You can really tell Hussie had a lot of fun with him. He's also just really, really fucking funny. Just about every sentence that comes out of his mouth is Grade A Absolute Fucking Gold, and I'm honestly obsessed with his dynamic with Dirk. This may get me thrown to the wolves, but I personally think Dirk and Caliborn have way more chemistry than Dirk and Jake. Maybe that's because we actually see Dirk and Caliborn interact on screen... Lmao.
Necessary Topic: I don't know why people hate him so much. Like, I understand hating his misogyny and fatphobia, sure, but those are deliberate character points and not just Hussie-isms. I see people act like Caliborn is indicative of Hussie, as if Homestuck-era Hussie wasn't, like, famously really fucking good at writing female characters and absolutely not a misogynist. Caliborn's a parody of Homestuck Anti-Fans - which is a term we really ought to bring back, god, anti-fans are absolutely still a thing and good lord they're everywhere - who really were just shitty little bigoted haters. Calliope, the opposite side of his coin, was representative of, essentially, "the best kind of Homestuck fan" - an ultimately sweet young teen girl who willingly dedicates almost all of her time to this piece of fiction she loves so, so much, who draws a lot of fan art for the joy of it all, has OCs that don't fit any of the design conventions in Homestuck whom she pairs with the characters in it for innocent fun. Someone who has a lot of theories and analyses, writes a lot of fanfic, and is genuinely just having a lot of fun. Everyone loves Calliope. Even the characters in Homestuck love Calliope. They just think she's the cutest, sweetest little thing they ever did see. Caliborn was the worst kind. He sucks on purpose. No one likes him. He is a total nuisance to characters he is by all means trying to impress. I love them both.
It's also just funny that he's a canonical Intersex Transmasc who is probably Gay and this has, like, no relevance to anything about him, really. So no one really talks about it. Gender Hilarious, Gender Nefarious.
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