#and the lights off fic for cod
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So a fic based in this and this idea (the Mav POV of Bradley and Jake being married and having 4 kids and him not knowing until the special detachment because they haven't talked in years) may be coming along EDIT: It is now on ao3 - here.
He tries not to look. He really does.
Penny raises an eyebrow at him and he tries to focus on the glass in front of him.
He still glances to the side. He can’t see them very well there, with all the people around, but he sees Bradley, with his back turned to him, handing over one of the babies to the woman he saw before — she is familiar, one of the pilots chosen for the mission. Lieutenant Trace, if he remembers correctly.
She coos a little, bouncing the baby — Bradley’s baby — in her arms and over the music, Mav catches her saying, “Where’s your hubby?”
He doesn’t hear Bradley’s reply.
He makes himself look away.
Did you know? he texts Ice. About Bradley?
Yes.
He’s got kids.
I know, Ice replies and Mav tries to bit down on the irrational anger — he’s been telling him for years to not relay to him anything about Bradley, as punishment. They have them as dependents on files.
Mav stares at the words on the screen. They. Bradley has a husband and kids and Mav’s never met them. He didn’t even know they existed before today.
Do they know Mav exists? Has Bradley told his husband about Mav or about Ice? Has he told his kids who taught him to read or who taught him how to ride a bike or who used to read him to sleep or who would hold him when he cried through the nights? Or has he erased them from existence in his life completely?
“Are you going to talk to him?” Penny asks.
#i think i need a bit of a break from my usual fics because I'm stressing over getting them 'perfect' too much#so I'm going to write whatever my brain is in the mood for#which is this fic#the kinky buddie fic for my other account#the omegaverse hangster fic#and the lights off fic for cod#idk#we'll see#hangster#mavdad#tgm#charlie writes#op#q
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reunion 🕯️
#AHHAA#i hope u guys get my vision here#based off of what will be a later chapter of my cia!soap fic#mhmmgfghg sunshine soap = soap as a light source my beloved#call of duty#cod#cod mw2#artists on tumblr#cod fanart#soap cod#john soap mactavish#john “soap” mactavish#soapghost#ghostsoap#ghoap#simon ghost riley#simon “ghost” riley#task force 141#tf141#ghost x soap#soap x ghost#gay#mw2#mw3#mwiii#cod mw3#👍
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MDNI pairing; simon "ghost" riley x fem!reader warnings; smut (18+ ONLY), rough rough sex, heavy choking, breathplay & asphyxiation in a controlled environment, loss of consciousness, multiple orgasms, simon is mean but in a sweet way, pre-established consent, subspace (may write a part two of the aftercare if that's something you lot would be interested in!) a/n; this is my first cod fic so go easy on me please!! my cod requests and thirst discussions are wide open (like me for simon ngl) so if you have anything you want to talk about or request PLEASE don't hesitate to pop it in my inbox!
Really, you did this to yourself.
You're the one who asked Simon to be rough, to manhandle you, to fuck you hard and deep until you forget your own name.
He does just that.
He's got your back anchored to his firm chest by means of a thick bicep curled around your throat, restricting your airways just enough until the world tunes out around you, everything a little fuzzy as he pistons his hips into your soft cunt; all you can feel is him, the way the fat head of his cock nestles deep against your cervix, the drag of it against your walls as he pulls out only to force you wide open again for him.
You're far past forming coherent words, eyes rolling and lashes fluttering when he hikes you further up by the soft column of your throat until you arch against his chest, limp and pliable like putty under the control of those experienced hands. Your cunt drools with each rocking movement, excreting more of the milky fluid as the vein that runs against the underside of his cock- purple and angry with his arousal- creates a delicious friction against your pulsing insides.
You garble something entirely unintelligible when that corded arm tightens around your neck, your mouth hanging open as you drool like a leaky tap, kiss-bitten lips gaping when you halfheartedly attempt to form something that isn't completely inarticulate.
You can't even warn him before you're cumming on the length of him with a silent cry, your muscles pulling tight like a bowstring as you quiver under his expert touch before you're falling limp, dead weight in his arms. His spare hand reaches up and over to deliver a firm slap to your cheek in an effort to rouse you from your haze, but you only sink further into that blissful headspace where nothing matters except the way that he's fucking you.
You're not sure you could beg him for more if you tried despite so desperately wanting it. Your sticky cunt weeps over his cock, running in a stream downward until his heavy balls are saturated in your sweet juices, your body twitching weakly when the pleasure washes over you once again.
"There you go, baby," he murmurs, fisting your hair into a ponytail at the back of your head until he's snapping your head up, those eyes hungrily surveying your wrecked expression– eyes blackened with mascara from crying on his cock, lids barely open in your daze, lips swollen and flushed dark with colour. If he were to release his bruising grip on you, you'd crumple, entirely unable to hold yourself up. "My good, good girl. You gonna let me give you one more?"
You whine something that neither one of you understand, but the nod of your head and the way your eyes light up as you drag yourself from bliss just enough to affirm has him resuming his movements, hiking his knee up and over your hip to give him deeper access to fuck you; his pace quickens and you're damn near wailing by the time he grabs your bobbing throat, all hulking six foot four of him tipping forward until your airway is near completely cut off and your noises are silenced by the flexing muscles.
"Easy, love, take it easy," he murmurs, demands really, cadence gravelly but saccharine sweet, a stark juxtaposition to his cruel touch; you're barrelling towards another orgasm, entire body alight and burning with a pleasure that's damn near unbearable; your arse is slick and bruised, branded by his touch as his hips slap lewdly against you.
It hits you like a freight train, every muscle pulling tight and then suddenly liquifying all at once– and as the pleasure ebbs away, you're hit with the frightening realisation that you truly can't breathe. You force a limp hand up to claw at the tense muscles clamped around your neck, a pained, gasping little noise breaking free of the confines of your chest. But still, he doesn't let up. The room spins and shrinks around you, darkness creeping in at the corners until it's consumed you. His voice is dark and unyielding against the shell of your ear.
"Let it happen," he says. "'ve got you. Don't fight it."
It's not like you have much of a choice anyway as your head drops, hair hanging loosely around your face when you fall headfirst into darkness.
When you come to, you're flat on your back, no longer speared on the thick length of him as he lazily pumps his cock, pressing your knees upward against your chest in order to have ample room to torture your throbbing cunt with calloused fingers.
"There she is." Simon grins when you whimper and reach up for him, gazing through sticky lashes with those teary eyes he adores. He indulges you, coming forward to smear a quick kiss to the crown of your skull before he's gathering your slick with the head of his cock, breaching your sore entrance once again.
That night, you're sure you meet God.
And he looks an awful lot like Simon Riley.
#simon ghost riley#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#simon ghost x reader#simon ghost x you#simon ghost smut#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon riley x y/n#simon ghost riley smut#simon ghost riley drabble#simon ghost riley blurb#simon ghost riley fanfiction#simon ghost riley fic#simon ghost riley fanart#cod mw2#cod mwii#ghost cod#cod x reader#call of duty modern warfare#simon riley smut#simon riley drabble#simon riley fanfic#ghost x reader#ghost x you#ghost x y/n#ghost smut#ghost simon riley#ghost drabble#ghost fanfiction
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Light On - single mom/neighbor fic Simon Riley/female reader - 18+ MDNI brief suggestive content, Christmas vibes (these characters do not celebrate Christmas religiously) 🎄 There'll be much mistltoeing / It's the most wonderful time of the year - for @glitterypirateduck's cod holiday challenge
"She's lovely." Laswell comments, standing at his shoulder in the living room.
"She is." He answers, but doesn't bother to look at her, too transfixed on you, watching the way you smile and laugh, champagne flute in one hand, baby in the other. Blood rushes through his body as he stares at you, marveling at how bloody good you look with the baby on your hip, and even though he knows it's an archaic mentality, he can't help but dream about giving you another. Kate gives him a smirk that he just barely catches from the corner of his eye, and he cuts her an exasperated look. "Excuse me."
"By all means."
He makes his way to your side where you're chatting with Gaz's date, Lily, wine colored velvet dress draped across your body, snug and silky across your skin. Your hair is done, styled differently, arranged on top of your head instead of your usual or pulled into something looser, shiny gold cuff curled around the top of your ear. You’re stunning, and his mind turns over, trying to determine if it’s okay or appropriate to tell you for the third time tonight that he’s obsessed with you, that he wants to get you home and worship you, wants to rip your dress off and ruin it. He wonders if you’ll let him take you home early, if you’ll be quiet for him when he bends you over the bed, if you’ll come on his cock all breathy and sweet with his name on your lips.
Emmaline sits embraced in nook of your elbow, white and green dress complemented by tiny, shiny, black shoes, babbling away at anyone who will look at her. She lights up when he steps closer, trying to tip out of your grasp towards his, discontent rising in her crumpled little brow when she can't break free.
"Hi." You beam, his hand finding the small of your back, Emmaline wriggling around to face him, leaning back with a big smile, knocking her head into his side. You roll your eyes at Lily. "I've become chopped liver to my own baby."
"Alright, sweet pea. C'mere then." He settles her on top of his forearm, chubby fist knotting into the collar of his shirt. "Let's give mama a break, eh?" You smile, relieved, reaching up for a kiss, tip toes stretching until he leans to meet you, and when you pull away, you give Emmaline one on her cheek, bright baby giggles echoing through the room. "We're going to see what the team is up to." He bounces her, and your thumb strokes a soft circle into his waist.
"Okay."
"There she is!" Gaz calls, and Emmaline squirms in Simon's grasp, pressing her face into his neck, head tilted just slightly so she can still see the guys, cheeks dimpled. She watches Kyle cautiously, incredibly shy, and Simon whispers to comfort her.
"What's wrong, baby girl? You're alright. It's just Gaz." She mouths at his shirt, and he smooths a hand over the back of her head softly. "She's not usually so reserved, loves attention."
"Ye're scaring her." Johnny admonishes as huffs, breath rolling in a fog through the chilled air, but when Simon turns, Emmaline whips around, peering over his shoulder to stare at Gaz, expression delighted.
"I don't think she's scared, Soap. Looks smitten to me." Johnny clucks his tongue, half outraged, and Gaz just laughs, stroking her cheek as she coos soft sweet nonsense towards him, making Johnny scowl.
“’m supposed tae be her favorite.” He grumbles, and Price barks out a laugh, clapping him on his back.
“Gotta get your own for that, son.” He shakes his head, reaching a finger out to her fist, letting her grab onto him. She immediately starts to drag it towards his mouth, and Price lets her, chuckling softly under his breath. “Needs something for her teeth.”
"I think we've got something in her bag." Simon rubs her back, watching how her eyes light up when she spots Price's beard, tiny fingers mindlessly drifting towards his chin. "Mama's been giving you frozen pacifiers, huh?"
"Ye should try scotch, my maw used tae give me some, when ah was a bairn." Johnny tickles his fingers across her side and she shrieks into a giggle fit, nearly choking on laughter that has him glowing with pride. "Who's yer favorite uncle, Emmaline? Is it Uncle Soap?" Johnny whispers in his best baby voice, and Simon snorts.
"She can't have scotch, MacTavish. She's a baby, and-"
"Alright out here?" You're standing in the door, half in, half out, teetering precariously on the top step, and for the hundredth time tonight you take Simon's breath away, light from the kitchen shimmering behind you like a halo, framing you in a soft, warm yellow glow, his stomach clenching.
"We're alright." He promises, already making his way towards the doorway, taking the stairs until you're within arms reach, Emmaline clapping her hands together when she spots you. "You okay?" He keeps his voice low, yet still tender, trying not to give the guys too much ammo, and you smile, spectacular and sweet, enough to make him melt on the spot.
"Yeah, just wanted to check on you two." You brush a finger across Emma's cheek, mouth opening to say something else when Johnny's voice rings across the patio, cheeky and smug.
"LT, ye're standın' under mistletoe." He hadn't noticed the cluster of greenery tacked to the bricked arch just outside the door, but it's hard to miss now, and when you glance above your head and laugh, he shrugs his shoulders. "Well..."
"Well?" You raise an eyebrow. A challenge. An invitation. Enough of both for him, encouragement not needed in the first place, his lips finding yours easily, pulling you into the bulk of his body, wrapping an arm around your waist while still holding Emma against his chest in the other. She bridges the gap between you, both of his girls safe and sheltered in his arms, and he blocks out the sound of Gaz and Johnny's shouting and whooping, focusing on the taste of your tongue, smell of your skin, plush lips against his. It's everything, you're everything, you and Emmaline- his family, his to love, to care for, to protect, emotion welling up in his chest that has him pulling away and pressing his nose against the top of your head, mouth finding your temple, your cheek, his eyes closed and breaths measured.
"Merry Christmas." He whispers, still holding you tight, and you dip forward to press a kiss to Emmaline's scalp, your hand reaching for his jaw, thumb reverently stroking across the scar on his cheek.
"Merry Christmas Simon."
#peaches writes#light on#simon riley#simon ghost riley#simon riley x reader#codholiday2023#simon ghost riley x reader
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somebody to hold
pairing: könig x female reader
rating: explicit (18+ MDNI)
word count: 4,884
summary:
König discovers cuddle therapy.
You discover König.
author’s note: i don’t play COD, i just have a mask kink. all translations are from google, so feel free to send me corrections if they are needed! translations available at the end of the fic
content warnings/additional tags: explicit sexual content (18+ MDNI), potentially bad German translations, mentions of König’s social anxiety, descriptions of scars, touch starved könig, oral sex (m receiving), size kink, praise kink, dirty talk, unprotected p in v, mild breeding kink, choking, fingering, ab riding. Let me know if any are missing!
“Hey, your next appointment is here,” the voice of the practice secretary, Amy, says from the doorway of your office.
You look up from your computer, brow furrowed as you click around your calendar. “I didn’t think I had a late appointment?”
“Last minute add. And just…prepare yourself,” she says, eyes comically wide before she disappears.
You shut your laptop and head for the waiting room, curious about what’s got Amy acting so funny.
You stop short in the doorway. Perhaps it’s the veritable mountain of a man sitting in the tiny plastic waiting room chair fully kitted in military combat gear, including a sniper hood that only reveals two pale blue eyes that scan the room. His hands rest on his large thighs, fingers curling against the fabric of his tac pants.
You’re not unfamiliar with military clients. Your office is near a base, after all. You’ve had a few wander in before. But you’ve never had one quite like him.
“Uh, hi? Hi,” you say, clearing your throat. His eyes shoot to you and you swallow nervously. You give him your name, followed with, “I’m going to be your cuddler this evening. Do you want to follow me back to the session room?”
The man gives a single nod before unfolding from his seat. He absolutely towers over you, his build just as broad as it is tall, and he has to tilt his head down to look at you. He holds an arm out, gesturing for you to lead the way.
You lead him to the back session room, a space curated for comfort. It’s painted a deep blue and lit only with dimmable lamp lighting and string lights that can be turned on or off, depending on the client’s preference. There’s a large couch pressed to one wall, a sectional that has a hidden portion that pulls out to fill in the middle, essentially turning it into a bed. It’s perfect for both seated snugglers and the prone cuddlers.
There’s a snack and water station set up on a wood console table near the door, and beside it are cubbies for storing belongings. A large basket of soft blankets sits near the couch, along with an array of pillows.
You look back at the man that has followed you through the door. Those blue eyes take in every detail of the room before they land back on you. You toe off your sneakers, leaving you in your frog patterned socks. You wiggle your toes.
“Did Amy explain the rules to you and brief you on the terms and conditions?” Another silent nod. “Okay, well, everything we do is completely up to you, within those parameters. We can talk or touch as much or as little as you’d like for the length of your appointment. I can make some suggestions for positions, if you’d like?”
His hands fidget at his sides, fingers flexing and curling into fists like he’s not sure what to do with them. He stares down at the shoes that you’ve left by the door.
“You don’t have to take anything off, if you don’t want to,” you reassure him. “Why don’t you take a seat on the couch?”
The man takes two broad steps before taking a seat, as instructed. You feel a weird sort of giddiness that a man clearly as powerful as him listened to your orders.
He sits with his back straight as a bar of steel, eyes trained on you for the next step in the process, hands placed on his thighs once more. You take a tentative step closer.
“I’m going to sit right here, okay?” You narrate as you sit down near him, a cushion of distance between your bodies. “Is this alright?”
He nods.
“Would you like me to be closer? Or farther?”
“Closer,” a deep accented voice says. It makes your breath catch, the quiet gentleness of it and the way it sounds rough from disuse. “Please.”
You scooch closer, the distance between your bodies shrinking but not yet removed. “Okay?”
“Ja. Yes,” he says. A pause. “Could you…closer?”
“Of course. Is it okay if our bodies touch?”
He nods. You close the gap between your bodies, your thigh pressed along his and your arms brushing with each breath. He’s tense, shoulders tight and fists clenched as he breathes rhythmically through his nose and out his mouth. You let him take a moment to adjust.
“What’s your name?” You ask quietly.
“König.”
________
You are very warm. König can feel the heat of you even through his gear.
He feels a bit ridiculous, sitting here on a couch beside a stranger who he has paid to cuddle him. And he can’t even reach that point yet. Even just having you sit beside him has him trying to calm his breathing.
In…2…3…4….Out.
“Would you like to talk about anything?” You ask. He glances down at you. Scheiße, you’re pretty. That fact certainly isn’t helping him keep calm.
He shakes his head, not trusting his voice to reply. You give him a small smile.
“Well, do you mind if I talk?”
No, he doesn’t mind at all. He’d listen to your voice for hours if he could, the way it's so soft to his ear compared to the shouts and commands he’s used to hearing day in and out. He shakes his head.
Your small smile grows, a bright grin across your face that makes your nose crinkle adorably. König finds his shoulders relaxing the slightest bit.
You tell him about your day and how you were looking forward to the weekend because there is a show that you wish to catch up on. You talk about your cat, a little orange tabby that you adopted three years ago named Toast and how he likes to perch inside the window and watch the birds outside of your apartment. You also mention that Toast has an entire wardrobe of sweaters for the winter that he hates, but you love putting him in them anyways.
Slowly, the tension leaves König’s body. He relaxes against the back of the couch and adjusts his legs, stretching them out in front of him. His hands, which once fidgeted in his lap, are now folded on his chest as he tilts his head back and listens to your stories.
“König?” You place a tentative hand on his shoulder. “Our time is up.”
He blinks. Oh. He must have fallen asleep. He looks over to find you smirking at him.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to bore you to sleep,” you say, voice self-deprecating.
“It was not boring, liebling,” he replies quietly.
______
The following week, you notice a calendar event labeled [CLASSIFIED]. You ask Amy about it.
“It’s the big guy from last week. He made a standing appointment,” she tells you. “But he’s all big, scary military so he didn’t give me a name to put down.”
You smile to yourself. You know his name.
It feels like a fun secret between the two of you.
You’re thrilled that he wants to come back. You hadn’t stopped thinking about his voice and those bright blue eyes all weekend.
When it's time for his appointment, you smile brightly at him in the waiting room. He follows you back to the session room, just as silent as the last time he visited.
You remove your shoes, just as before. He sits on the couch without being prompted.
“Would you like me to sit beside you? Like last time?” You ask. He nods.
You sit down, close enough that your limbs brush, just as you had the week prior. He seems a bit more at ease this time.
“How is Toast?” He asks. You beam at him, thrilled that he remembered you told him about your cat. You tell him about your weekend spent on the couch with your furry friend.
“Can I--,” he begins to ask, pausing uncertainly. He lifts his arm slightly.
You wiggle against him, settling against his side as his arm drops across your shoulders.
“Danke,” the man says. “Thank you.”
“Of course, König.”
______
It goes like that for four weeks. Konig sits on the couch and allows you to settle in beside him, your sides pressed together on the couch. You talk to him about anything and everything that comes to mind, and he listens intently.
He doesn’t talk much, but when he does, you cling to his words. Especially when he slips into speaking in German.
And if you have to press your thighs together for relief during those moments? Well, you hope the man doesn’t notice.
On the fifth week of his appointments, König surprises you.
When you remove your shoes, König begins to unclasp the buckles holding his tac vest to his chest. You grin at him in encouragement as he sets it to the side.
“I feel…naked,” he comments with a small huff of laughter.
You bite your lip, trying to hold back the cheeky reply that ran through your head. He is a client, after all.
He sits beside you on the couch, just as all the other sessions started, but he fidgets with the strap of his leg holster. “Could—,” he starts, pausing for breath. “Could we….lie down?”
“Of course,” you murmur. “Do you have a preference for position?”
“You can…lay your head on my chest?” He says. You give him an encouraging nod, standing up so that he can rearrange his large body so that he’s laying on his back. You reach for the pull tabs of the middle section, sliding it into place. He looks at you in surprise. “That was neat.”
You giggle. “Yeah, this couch is the best,” you comment as you crawl onto the cushion and settle your body along his, your head pillowed on his hard chest.
“This is…nice,” he says.
“Yeah, big guy. It is.”
______
Two weeks into sessions where you lay beside König, he begins talking.
In a quiet, albeit deep, voice he tells you about how he struggles with social anxiety. Being as big as he is was never useful for him until joining the military. He was mercilessly bullied in school as a young boy. He wanted to be a sniper, but his size was a burden to the position. Not to mention, he can’t sit still. He fidgets constantly, and his mind tends to wander if his body is not in motion.
His heart beats quickly beneath your ear as he tells you all the things about himself that he’d been keeping close to his chest for the last two months. He doesn’t stick to just the serious things. He tells you that his favorite color is blue. He has a massive sweet tooth and would kill a man for some traditional Sacher torte.
The laugh that accompanies that particular bit of information might just be your favorite sound in the world.
You don’t mention when your time with him has come to an end. You let him keep talking, afraid to break the spell and return König to his more stoic state.
König ends up noticing that the time has gone past his scheduled appointment. His blue eyes go wide and he sits up abruptly, knocking you off his chest as he begins to apologize profusely in a mix of German and English.
You place a hand on his chest. “It’s okay, König. Really. I just…I like spending time with you,” you admit quietly.
He rests a large gloved hand over yours.
“I enjoy our time as well, mein herz.”
______
König doesn’t show for his next scheduled appointment.
Or the one after that.
Or the one after that.
By the fourth missed appointment, you start to lose hope that you’d ever see him again.
You just hope he’s okay.
______
A sharp knocking noise breaks through your heavy sleep. You roll from the bed, landing gracelessly to the ground and startling Toast, the tabby darting beneath the bed for cover. Another knock sounds through the apartment as you stumble towards the door.
You stand on the tips of your toes to peer through the peephole with bleary eyes. Fumbling with the locks, you pull the door open as quickly as you can.
“König?” You ask breathlessly.
______
The adrenaline from the mission still courses in König’s veins as he tries to wait patiently for you to answer the door to your apartment, but he’s about one minute from either kicking down the door or picking the locks.
He imagines you would likely not appreciate either effort.
But finally, finally, he can hear your soft steps on the other side of the door before the locks disengage and the door is pulled open.
“König?” You ask. You’re wearing a large t-shirt that hits the middle of your thighs, more skin on display for his greedy eyes than he’s ever gotten the chance to see before.
“Liebling,” Konig replies. He steps forward, tentatively crossing the threshold to your home. When you don’t stop him, he takes another step. You look up at him with wide eyes.
“Where…what—,” you stutter, moving aside so that he can fully enter the apartment. He shuts the door behind him.
“Please, liebling, I–,” he starts, words catching in his throat as he looks down at you, the emotions bubbling up his throat. “I need you.”
______
König keeps his eyes trained on you as he unbuckles his helmet, lifting it from his head and dropping it to the floor. Next are the protective braces on his arms and legs, followed by the heavy tac vest and thigh holster.
He lifts the sniper hood, revealing the black balaclava beneath. His chest heaves with harsh breaths as his wide eyes scan your face.
You step forward, wrapping your arms around his middle and squeezing tightly, your head pressed to his chest as you close your eyes and inhale the scent of him.
“Missed you, König,” you murmur. His arms wrap around your shoulders, holding you impossibly tight to his body.
Suddenly you’re lifted from the ground and you squeak with surprise, your legs wrapping around his waist and your arms circling the back of his neck, holding onto him like a koala. The position puts you face to face with the man. His eyes search yours.
“Is this okay?” He asks. All you can do is nod. “Where is your bedroom?”
“Down the hall, last door on the right,” you instruct. König abandons his gear by the door, taking broad steps down the hall in the direction you gave. He gives the door a gentle kick, opening it wide enough to enter.
Toast darts out from beneath the bed, sliding past König’s legs and out to the living area.
He sets you gently on the bed, standing between your spread legs. His eyes remain fixed on yours as he kneels, deft fingers tugging at the laces of his boots.
You could get used to a view like this.
König stands to his full height once he’s removed his boots. A broad, scarred hand cups your cheek tenderly, calloused thumb moving across your cheekbone.
“Mein Liebling," he murmurs. His hand leaves your face and works the fly of his pants open, tugging the rough fabric down over his thighs.
You try very hard not to look but when he curls his fingers into the hem of his combat shirt, you can’t help the greedy way your eyes rove the miles of pale skin.
You take in the muscular thighs that give way to a defined Adonis belt, the cut so severe beneath the waistband of his boxer briefs that you long to trace your tongue along the valley. His abs flex, guiding your exploration up towards his thick chest.
There’s a litany of scars across his body, from smaller bullet wounds to deep slashes covered in thick scar tissue. You reach a hand out, lightly trailing your fingers across one that spans from his collarbone to the middle of his chest.
His hand curls over yours, holding it still against his warm skin. You can feel the frantic beat of his heart beneath your palm.
König’s free hand grasps the top of the balaclava and pulls, finally revealing the face of the man that’s occupied your every free thought over the almost two months you’ve known him.
Shaggy dark blonde hair falls across his forehead, slightly damp with sweat. Thick straight brows over the ice blue eyes framed with long blonde lashes you’ve become so familiar with. A slightly crooked nose and high cheekbones that lead into a strong, stubbled jaw.
There are scars on his face, too. A long silver scar slashes through this eyebrow and across his nose. Another cuts across the high point of his cheek.
He is so beautiful.
You watch as his cheeks turn pink and you belatedly realize you’d said that out loud. You shift to your knees on the mattress, reaching for his hand and pulling him toward you. He plants a knee on the soft surface and you guide him up until you’ve reached the pillows.
Stiffly, he lays beside you, head turned to watch you with those familiar blue eyes. You lay your head on his chest, sighing at the heat of his skin beneath your cheek. You wrap your arm around his waist and throw a leg over his hips, squeezing him tightly.
König doesn’t speak. He has an arm around your body, fingers pressing into the grooves of your ribs to hold you close. You breathe in tandem and his tense muscles begin to relax in your hold.
You shift your leg slightly, eyes going wide as you feel his cock against your knee. Feeling brave, you shift again, dragging your knee along the side of him.
His breathing stutters and you can feel his abs tense beneath you. You slide your hand across his chest, skimming your fingertips across the tight muscles.
“What are you doing, Kleine?” he asks. You lift your head from his chest to look at him.
“I want…can I—,” you stutter, losing your words at the dark look in the man’s eyes.
“I would let you do anything you wanted to me,” König says. “All you have to do is ask.”
You swallow nervously. “Can I touch you?”
“You are touching me,” he replies, a little smirk tilting his lips.
You ghost your hand across his straining length in retaliation. The smirk drops so fast you can’t help the giggle that escapes your lips.
“What happened to all that cockiness, hm?”
“Do not tease.” His hips flex beneath your palm, grinding his cock against your hand. “I have very little patience for it.”
You sit up on your knees beside him, moving one of his thick thighs to the side with a press of your hand so that you can crawl between his legs. He looks down at you with half lidded eyes, an arm thrown behind his head to prop him up to see better. You curl your fingers into the waistband of his boxer briefs.
“Is this okay?” You ask. He nods.
Permission granted, you slowly work the elastic down until his cock bobs free, slapping obscenely against his abs. Your mouth waters at the sight of the thick, uncut length of him.
“Jesus Christ, König,” you mutter. “Where do you think this thing is going to fit?”
“Ideally? Down your throat and then your cunt,” he replies easily. When you look up at him with wide eyes, he grins so brightly you feel like you’re looking into the sun.
And you’d gladly go blind for it.
You lean forward, giving into the urge to dip your tongue against the divot of his hip, running it along the cut of his abs reverently. His hips jolt at the contact, a whine spilling from his plush pink lips.
“Scheiß,” the man growls. “Bitte, baby, please,” he begs.
You let your tongue trail along the underside of his cock, tracing the prominent vein there to the flared head. You swirl your tongue along the tip, gathering the bead of precum and swallowing it greedily.
König’s chest rises and falls rapidly with his heavy breathing, his large hands fisting your blankets so tightly you briefly worry his bones may crack. He watches you intensely, almost like he’s worried you may disappear if he so much as blinks.
“Relax, König,” you coo, wrapping your hand around the base of his cock. “Let me take care of you.”
______
König has to think about the steps for disassembling a rifle to prevent himself from coming down your throat too quickly. The tight wet heat of your mouth feels so heavenly that for a moment, he worries that he may have actually taken a bullet to the chest on this last mission and he is actually in heaven.
But then you swirl your tongue around the sensitive head of his cock when you draw up his length and he realizes there would be no sin as glorious as this in heaven.
You eyes catch his as you slide him to the back of your throat, your lips straining around him as you try valiantly to take more of him than your limit allows. You gag around him, throating tightening exquisitely before you withdraw for a gasp of air.
You return to your task with admirable determination, eyebrows pinched together in concentration as you work to relax your throat and draw him in deeper.
“Just a little more, liebling, you can do it,” he murmurs, cupping your cheek, feeling the bulge of him in your mouth as his thumb traces the stretch of your lips around his cock. “Nimm das alles für mich.”
Your lips meet your small hand that is still wrapped around the base of him and you breathe deeply through your nose as you hold yourself there for a moment, throat fluttering around him. He groans, fighting the urge to flex his hips and drive himself even deeper.
“That’s it,” he whispers. Your eyelashes glisten with little tears, tiny pearls of wetness that speak to your efforts to please him. “That’s my baby.”
You moan around him as you pull back, his cock dropping from your mouth with an obscene pop. Your breathing is labored as you scramble up his body. König’s hands steady you with a grip around your waist as you reach for his face, tugging him into a messy kiss.
It’s a desperate clashing of lips and teeth and tongues that has König groaning, little whimpers slipping past your lips as he explores your mouth. Your teeth nip into his lower lip before trailing down his jaw and neck.
“Let me see you, Schatz,” he asks, a hand sliding up the back of your thigh to grip your ass and grind your body against his.
You flip beside him hastily, tearing your panties down your thighs and pulling your shirt over your head. Gloriously naked, you straddle his waist.
You’ve positioned yourself just out of reach of where he wants to feel you the most. His hands circle your waist, sliding up until his thumbs caress the underside of your breasts.
“So schön, meine liebe,” he murmurs, brushing his thumb across one tight nipple. Your hips flex and roll across his stomach and he can feel the slick wetness drenching his abs.
“König,” you moan, blunt little nails curling into the hard muscle of his pecs. Your head drops back, the long line of your throat calling to his hand.
He gives into the impulse, wrapping his fingers around your delicate neck, not constricting but merely holding. Your eyes go wide, hands gripping his wrist as you lean into the hold, your hips still grinding against him.
“You are making quite the mess,” König comments with a grin. You shudder in his hold. “Do not worry, liebling, I have never been afraid to get dirty.”
You moan, the sound vibrating deliciously against the hand he still holds around your neck. Your hips still over him as your release courses through you, your eyes fluttering shut.
König releases your throat and you sag against him. He runs a hand down your sweat slick back, over the curve of your ass until he can slip a single finger into your still fluttering hole. You gasp against his neck and he smiles.
“So fucking tight,” he groans, working his hand against you. You make little whimpering noises, lips working against his neck as you rock back against him. He eases a second finger into your dripping pussy, which earns him the sting of your teeth against his skin. “Scheiß!”
_______
You push yourself up on shaky arms, staring down into König’s dark eyes. His fingers slip from your pussy and you whine quietly at the loss.
“Wanna fuck you, König, please?” You murmur.
“I would love nothing more,” he says. He takes his cock in hand. “Take it, liebling.”
You lift your hips to position yourself over him, the fat tip of him notched at your entrance as you start your slow descent. The stretch of him is almost too much to bear, and it must show in your face because he drags a soothing hand across your thigh.
“That’s it,” he coos.
You slide another inch further with a whimper. “You’re so fucking big,” you tell him breathlessly. He chuckles, his cock pulsing inside of you and making you moan.
“Just think about how good it will feel when it is all inside of you, mein süße,” he says. “Filling every inch of you.”
You moan, your body accepting another inch. Your thighs shake with your efforts.
König’s hands grip your hips tightly, sure to leave fingertip shaped bruises that you’ll discover in the morning. On a deep breath, you lower yourself until you’re fully seated and stretched to your limit.
“Good fucking girl,” he growls. You meet his eyes, the blue nothing more than a thin ring around his blown pupils. His chest heaves as he breathes that same controlled rhythm you’ve watched him use before.
In…two…three…four…out.
You shift your hips experimentally, gasping at the overwhelming feeling of fullness. He wasn’t kidding about filling every last inch of you.
Pressing your hands to his chest, you lift your hips just barely off of him before dropping yourself back down. He moans, your name a curse and a prayer on his lips as you continue to build up a rhythm for yourself until you’re lifting almost fully off of him and slamming back down.
“Scheiß! Fuck!” König shouts as your pace picks up. “Mein perfekter kleiner Schatz.”
You lean forward to meet his lips, more of a sharing of breath than a kiss. He wraps his arms around your waist, holding you still as he thrusts up into you.
“König!” You cry, the slide and stretch and dull ache of him too much and yet not enough. His powerful thrusts are so deep at this angle that your eyes well with tears. Each drag of his cock from your pussy hits a spot that makes you see stars. “I’m gonna cum, please, König, please make me cum.”
“Anything for you,” he promises through gritted teeth, his hips picking up speed as he uses a hand on your ass to help slam you down on his cock. He turns his head, his nose brushing against yours tenderly in direct contrast to the way his hips pound against you. “Cum for me, engel. Let me see you.”
With a cry, you do just as he commands, your whole body going taught before sparking like a live wire, your release rolling over you so strongly it's more like a tsunami than a wave. He moans against your lips, hips pounding in an erratic speed as he works you through your orgasm and into his own.
“Fill me up, König,” you slur. “Wanna feel you. Bet you’ll get it so deep with your huge fucking cock.”
He comes with a deep groan, pressing up so deep as he spills inside of you that you gasp at the sensation, the warm heat of him filling you to the brim.
You collapse against him, the sweat on your bodies cooling in the chill of your apartment. He presses a kiss to the crown of your head.
“I missed you,” you murmur, tilting your head up to meet his eyes. “I’m glad you’re safe.”
“I will always come back,” he whispers, smoothing the sweat damp hair from your forehead. “So long as you are here for me.”
You tug the blanket from the foot of the bed over your bodies, snuggling into his side. You enjoy the quiet together, his fingers drifting up and down your back. The rapid patter of paws on the wood floor announces the approach of your cat.
The orange tabby hops on the bed, walking on light feet until he reaches the pillow König rests his head on. He curls up along the top of the man’s head, purring contentedly.
“Hello, Toast,” he says. His eyes flick to you. “This is a good sign, yes?”
“I’d say it was an excellent sign,” you reply, kissing the man’s cheek. He smiles.
“Good. Because I think I will be here a while.”
Translations:
Scheiße - fuck
Danke - thank you
mein herz - my heart
Mein Liebling - my darling
Kleine - little one
Bitte - please
Nimm das alles für mich - take it all for me
Schatz - treasure
So schön, meine liebe - so beautiful, my love
mein süße- my sweet
Mein perfekter kleiner Schatz - my perfect little darling
engel - angel
#konig x y/n#konig fic#konig smut#konig mw2#konig x reader#konig x female reader#könig x reader#könig call of duty#könig mw2#könig x you#könig smut#könig x y/n#könig fanfiction#könig modern warfare#könig cod
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canis major
adler x bell!reader
summary: adler doesn’t go back to berlin to forget, but he isn’t so eager to remember, either. after leaving you for dead on that clifftop in the arctic, he knows best to leave the past well alone. too bad that past seems to be alive and walking right in front of him; though where he wants to forget, it seems you’ve already beaten him to the punch. or; bell survives solovetsky and only has a hole in her head and amnesia to show for it. read on ao3
tags/cw: bell!reader, amnesia, light angst, referenced adlerbell, somehow bell survives the ending of cw, adler can't let shit go, adler is not capable of remorse but mayyybe a lil guilt?? dog symbolism always, no pairing yet but hopefully i continue this as a spicy drabble series idk wc: 2.7k
a/n: sooo this is my first fic for the cod fandom and the first fic i've posted online in a long time so hopefully this lil ramble suffices!! i've had adlerbell brainrot and wanted to get at least something out before bo6 ruins all of my headcanons so here's a snippet of something i hopefully find the motivation to continue into a mini series. enjoy :')
Sometimes, he goes back to Berlin.
Stumbling out of the muggy bar into the dank alleyway out the back, Adler fishes out a pack of cigarettes from the front of his jacket; two firm knocks of it against his palm before he plucks one out with his mouth, pockets the box, and flips open his lighter. The clink of the metal echoes into the empty around him, the sudden quiet suffused with the sounds of passing cars on the street, muffled laughter from inside the bar, and the distant barking of dogs. Strays.
The cigarette ignites, glowing a cherry red, and he gasps around the filter greedily. Upon exhale, he sighs.
Adler isn’t a sentimental man by any means. What little he clings to, he does so with a loose grip, less than happy but stolid enough to allow whatever else he deems unnecessary slip through his fingers. Places, people. Things. Memories. Tucks the important things- logic, rationality, work, duty- into orderly compartments at the forefront of his mind, archived and marked off ‘til he needs it, while the rest, the mess, gets done away with, thrown into the great black gorge of oblivion. Anything else that stays- more often than not a thorn in his side, an unbidden, wriggling tumour he can’t find let alone cut out- is sequestered to a dark aperture in the back of his mind, anchored deep where it can’t come back up. Yet somehow, some nights, they always do. The smell of his ex-wife’s hair. The day he got his scar. Vietnam. The lab. Solovetsky—
The next word, the name, forks across his mind like lightning, and he bites his tongue before he can think it. It sits at the back of his mouth, nestled like an aching cavity in his molars. A tremulous breath that he forces down with another drag of his cigarette. Out with the rest. Out with the rest.
The barking doesn’t cease. Dogs, a pair of them, he can hear a couple streets over. He pictures them from the gravelly register of their snarling- maybe German Shepherds, a Bullmastiff or a Rottweiler. Their fight enunciated by the violent rattling of chain-link fences, segregated, the only threshold that keeps teeth from necks.
But no, not a sentimental man. He tells himself that the itch to revisit Berlin every Summer is for superficial reasons, and by no means is renting out a shithole hotel room opposite a sewer-laden river considered a vacation from anything other than the luxuries he gorges himself mindlessly on at home- maybe this is to keep him humble, more than anything. It doesn’t do well to remind himself of old times, not when he’s lived the life he has. Remembering seldom accompanies itself with the bittersweetness of reminiscence, and the taste it leaves in his mouth is always acrid. He doesn’t miss Berlin any more than he misses that dismal safehouse, or that sterile room he wheeled you into, questioned- tortured- no, interrogated- well, he doesn’t care to remind himself of the picture. Or the person he strapped to the gurney. But he catches himself thinking back to the city divided more than he likes to admit, and for whatever ostensible reason it is that drags him back here, he relents to it every time.
He tells himself it’s the weather, the cool rain a nice reprieve from the scorching California heat. Or that the food is better, not so much overprocessed shit and sugars. Can take his coffee as black as he likes without the waitress turning her nose up about it and double-triple-checking if he’s sure. And it’s the people, maybe, who leave him well enough alone. Or the drinks. The views, some places. The- air.
Not like Arctic air. Not like—
The one dog’s snarl rips bloodcurdling through the night, all froth and venom, and as the chain-link fence screeches and judders in its rusted welding the other mutt quiets a moment. Cowers under the meaner dog’s ferocity. Then, like it had been wounded, it lets out a low, anguished howl, beast reduced to a scared little pup. Adler holds the smoke in his chest around a stifled breath anticipating a release. But the first dog just grumbles, the fence clinks, and there isn’t much noise after that.
But the quiet doesn’t last long- just as Adler drops his cigarette and snuffs it with a wrench of his heel, another sound resonates, yowling through the alley.
The grinding of tires upon wet asphalt crunches from just beyond the alleyway entrance. The streetlamp overhanging the entryway glares bright yellow as it bounces off of the garishly coloured taxi cab, pulling up to a groaning halt outside the bar.
He thinks nothing of it, pulling at the collar of his leather jacket. It’s getting cold, and he’s left his drink inside. Wouldn’t want to waste good beer. Adler turns, and makes for the door.
And you step out of the car.
A half-finished cigarette bounces on the sidewalk before you exit, the softened heel of your boot following soon after in a splash upon the flooded curb. Your German is rusty- always has been- but it’s easy enough to utter a quick and easy danke as you pull yourself up out of the cab. The door shuts with a slam, and you tilt your head back to gaze up at the sign above the bar- Der Fluss Lethe glaring in faded lightbox red- and you let out a contented sigh, your breath suspended in the frigid air. Pink, bitten fingers pluck at your gloves, fingerless faded green knit, shovelling them into your jacket pocket.
Adler’s fist is already curled around the handle of the back door as he clocks your presence in his periphery, a stranger like any other- but your image resembles the one that coagulates in the borders of old memory, the dried blood of you he hasn’t been able to wash his hands of since ‘81. Enough that he does a double take, his eyes wide behind tinted glasses, and he stops, his heart following suit.
He’s seen enough bodies in his time to fill the morgue in his mind twice over, and plenty ghosts to wander coldly among the unmarked graves. Vietnam alone is an unwinding cemetery stretching endless, catacombs along the inside of his skull, lined with what his old shrink would call remorse. Guilt. As if the feeling mattered. As if self-reproach could turn self-flagellation into something so incandescent as redemption. As if the bile in the back of his throat could bring back the dead.
And it couldn’t, because it isn’t… that’s not—
Bell.
It’s in the way you stand, your back rigid, that slight slouch to your shoulders, always dragged down upon you like they bore the weight of the whole world (and they did, once, do you remember?). The pelting of rain smacks off of the lapels of your jacket and ricochets like stars, caught in the light of the streetlamp overhead, but for all he knows or cares it could be raining diamond and all he sees is you- the wrinkling of your nose as you accommodate to the cold, how your cheeks flush at the chill (as they had those nights he pulled you into the darkroom, evidence of your apprehension drowned in the red glow of safelights); your hair is longer, unkempt, but still that same colour (clumps he’d find in his clenched fist when you’d argue yourselves into a wrestling match, pinning each other by the throats to dented walls in Die Landebahn); that scar upon your brow; that wavering line of your lip, pursed and hiding behind your reticence as you always did, and your eyes- your eyes—
—you feel someone watching—
—your eyes turn, and fix upon him with the startled softness of a doe, hunter betrayed by the snapping of a branch underfoot. Adler’s heel crunches against broken glass, his hand lingering right in that threadbare threshold upon the doorhandle, and he can’t speak, can’t move, can’t think—
Open the door, Bell, open the door—
—and you stop outside the cab, your breath caught in your throat. You see a shadow in the alley, in the shape of a man.
The darkness of the alley gives enough cover that you don’t see much, but what you do make out of the man prickles at a part of your mind long dormant: the haughtily broad set of the shoulders; the halo of blond tinted red just beneath the flickering exit light above the door where he stands; the shadow of a strong, clenched jaw; and in the brief glinting of passing headlights as cars rush on behind you, you see a face half gorged by a thick, forked scar, a fissure struck down his furrowed expression. A pair of dark aviator glasses hide those eyes that you know are looking at you, reflecting back nothing but your own bewilderment.
There is something you know. Deep inside that half rotted head of yours, where an incomplete recollection of your existence before you awoke bleeding on that clifftop lies, you feel a twinge of recognition. Familiarity. Something. Something stirring deep in your marrow- a fear inherited, a conditioned surrender, a faded polaroid, a kiss? Your migraine, chronic, comes clawing back with a vengeance, as it does most nights, but this time with a savage fervour that wrenches your face into an involuntary grimace. Where the hole in your head had once been all those years ago it tickles and burns, burrowing into your brain and groping greedy fingers along remnants of memory. It claws at you, digging through your amygdala to find something fresh, something old, something palpable, real, something- anything. Searching what little remains visible to you in the thick fog of your own mind to pin a meaning to this feeling, an answer to your question, a name to that face.
You’ve seen him before. You swear. Somewhere. In a dream, reoccurring, behind a red door. You don’t know how, or why you’d think you recognise him- in those dreams, the door never even opens. Your hand ever stuck on the handle, jammed and impenetrable, what sits behind it forbidden to you. Like not even your own mind wants you to know. It confines you to your ignorance, almost blissful.
Adler’s heart kicks violently in his chest. He shot you. He killed you. He’d heard your death rattle on that clifftop in Solovetsky and the sound was almost like singing, your last word, your last breath. A miserere for your short and fractured life. And he’s looking at your ghost, standing there all owl-eyed and as beautiful as the day he found you bleeding out on that airstrip. Before he took you. Before he took you and collared you and made a damned mess of things.
The only thing separating you from the Bell he knows he killed- his Bell- is the star-shaped scar split across your left temple. The only wound he never had to sit and heal as he belligerently patched you up, poking and preening you like his prize dog. Yet in spite of never seeing it before, he recognises the wound all too well. He put it there himself.
And as you stand there for that brief moment- no more than twelve seconds stretched to an eternity- he thinks for a moment that you’ve put it together. You recognise him. You see him. As he is. You’ve figured him out, Bell, as you always do. You’re the only one to have gotten away with it, nearly. Or so he thought. And now he’s watching a corpse having dug itself out of the grave he put it in, standing there, staring at him. Suppose you’ve always been a dead man walking.
You could do it, he thinks. Turn. Fling your heel round and barrel towards him with all the enmity of a cornered animal. He thinks of the strays, barking. Can picture your mouth frothing at the sides as you sink your teeth down into him- gnarled canines, hooked to your chain-link fence- which he probably deserves. Not an unfamiliar feeling by any stretch, but one faraway enough to seem almost sweet now through the hazy lens of nostalgia. If there truly is a sentimental bone in his body after all, then maybe it’s just for that. Still, he holds his breath, awaiting the killing blow he’s surely due. But it never comes.
You release your held breath, finally, tearing your eyes away from the callous faced stranger. It’s a ridiculous notion. Just an uncanny instance of déjà vu. You don’t know that man any more than you know yourself. You settle on a more rational answer- just one of those faces. And with a disgruntled sigh you rub the scar upon your temple to soothe the ache, turn around, and enter the bar alone.
Adler sighs, his heart sinking from up high in his throat back down to his chest. His hand has latched onto the doorhandle for so long it’s gone numb from the cold, bruised knuckles bluer than they were before (bar fights- not here, but another, as there will always be). He wrestles his jaw pensively, knowing he ought to take it off, keep the door closed, turn away, and leave. Slink back, tail between his legs, to that shithole hotel room to drink himself into a stupor. Let you haunt him there, instead. As you always have.
But he doesn’t. He has no idea what idiocy compels him, what soft, dewy-eyed weak link in him snags on that chain, to willingly wander back into the viper den of reminiscence, but he wrenches his fist around the handle, pushes, and lets himself back into the bar, the thick, hot air hitting him like a drug that he breathes in, tart and sour with the cloy of sweat and alcohol but still faintly- just faintly- of you. Like rain carried along the wind.
And Russell Adler is not a sentimental man.
But from across the bar he hides behind his beer glass, watches as you move about, a phantom, weaving through the faceless mass of people celebrating a championship he cares nothing to follow. You take your order at the bar with a smile he’s never seen on you before, boots folded to tip-toes as you lean over the liquor-stickied top, your perfect mouth pink and sweet and laughing and alive. The world seems to move about you in a haze, an indistinct mist of blurred faces and bottled voices and beyond all the light and life and joy that seems to burn bright around you like a halo all he sees is you.
Maybe, then, he’s a fool.
But it isn’t lost on him, how your fingers skirt across your hair in an attempt to hide the scar upon your temple. Nor is it lost on him how you wince at the feeling, the stars in your eyes dimmed for just a split second as you shiver, like a touch imperceptible running fingers down your back. Nor even the way you fight the urge to look, to follow the feeling of his eyes fixed upon you, and surely not the way you lose that fight, surrendered to it, your sweet face turning and finding him in an instant. Without so much as trying, like instinct, like something as pathetic and saccharine as fate. Your heart called to it, a lighthouse in the fog. Port in the storm. Ships passing in the night but called crashing to the same shore.
(The pieces of you are scattered everywhere, Bell. He finds you in every split seam inside himself. Splintered shrapnel dug through his temporal lobe, severing synapses ‘til they go dark. Even stars die quicker than that. Quicker than you. Is that what it felt like for you, too? When the lights went out, was it him you last saw- or the sky, waxen, over the Arctic? A waning night, a distant moon. The inconsequence of death- brief celestial ephemera.)
The stranger across the bar looks at you, offering nary a smile, eyes indiscernible behind shadowed sunglasses. And where you ought to find his apparent coldness disconcerting, instead you wring out of your chest with a white-knuckled caress a feeling like… comfort.
Sometimes, Bell, you go back to Berlin. You don’t quite know why.
#im so nervous but like whatever 3 people are gonna see this so idc#i wanna write more for this but hhhh no pressure so prolly short snippets#just feels good to write something im proud of again after so long!!#my writing#my fics#one shot#adlerbell#adler x bell#russell adler x bell#adler x reader#russell adler x reader#adbell#cod x reader#cod cw#cod bocw#call of duty x reader#cod bo6#cod cold war#call of duty cold war#call of duty black ops#black ops 6#black ops cold war#russell adler#adler
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I hate to ask this cause it feels stupid but I dont wanna do a bunch of research on whatever the recent cod mw fandom discourse is,
but I saw the reblog of someone accusing you of supporting people who write sexualized pedophilia and that really is personally my only """"moral"""" with nsfw shit, (I'm a patreon subscriber and ig I just wanna know where my money's going) is THAT true?
i used to follow an artist who, 5-6 months ago made racist art featuring gaz and soap in a slave context, which I didn't like, retweet or interact with in any way. they also made under-age art of ghost soap, which I also didn't interact with . people on twitter called me out yesterday, for retweeting (months before this incident) other art they'd made as evidence I stood by/encouraged/was an avid fan of all these tropes. The art I retweeted wasn't either of these previous examples of art, but one where ghost and soap were sleeping in a bed together, as adults, peacefully. I can't emphasise enough that I have not interacted with this artist at all, for over six months. The callout in question has framed me as a close friend of theirs when, in truth, our total timeline of interactions could probably be counted on one hand, and I haven't interacted with her in so long that I genuinely forgot I was still following her.
The crux of all is this is that I did not unfollow + block this artist earlier on when the racist art was posted months ago, and then I retweeted a fic tagged with "non-con" (ghost gets soap off in a context where he can't really properly consent, they're in front of a crowd of strangers and they have to fuck, but both parties are into each other) written by a friend as I wanted to support their writing.
The pedophile claims are because I retweeted a fandom bingo post that defended loli-con without reading all the squares properly, and then immediately un-retweeted it when I properly read it. All in all, the post was on my account for maybe a few minutes.
The zoophile claims are because people say i support someone who wrote zoophilic fic and called people slurs, and I genuinely don't know who they're talking about there.
The anti-asian racism claims come from the original accusers in the callout thread thinking that I made Horangi's eyes in the monster!AU sensitive as a way of making fun of Asian eyes. The real reason is because he's a cat hybrid in that AU and cats are sensitive to light.
I tried addressing all this in a casual way earlier on in a misguided attempt to sort things out more 'civilly', and responded to an ask talking about my "support" for the artist who drew the slave Gaz art by saying the fanart in question was tone deaf and in poor taste. It wasn't enough for some people, so I'm happy to say it clearly- yes, it was racist, and the reason why I didn't want to be more aggressive is because I didn't want to extend all this mess by throwing this artist directly to the wolves - I genuinely believed them at the time when they said that wasn't that their intention, and think they should've deleted the post at the time, but not unfollowing was a decision that I made. I know now upon reflection that it was naive of me, unwarranted and frankly irresponsible to take a stranger at face value and believe they had good intentions, when the act of not deleting the post in question was evidence of a lack in remorse. In the moment, I'd thought back to my own personal experience with a friend of mine who used an asian slur in my company, who later sincerely apologised and legitimately cleaned up his act after I gave him a second chance. It informed my choice to not unfollow at the time, but there's a difference between someone you know irl for months and a stranger on the internet you've interacted with a few times. I shouldn't have coddled them in my response, and I'm sorry for not treating it with the severity it deserved. It was callous, and stupid, and indicative of internal biases that I ever thought it was a light enough offence to "see through", and I deeply deeply apologise. I promise from the bottom of my heart to do better.
That's everything so far. I didn't unfollow an artist when I absolutely should've, which i'll always strongly regret. I also retweeted a properly-tagged fic on my clearly 18+ nsfw account. I've undone both of those actions now. I hope this can be the end of it.
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Missing You
Gar Logan x Fem!Reader x Jason Todd
Summary:
Gar misses his two best friends. When he calls the two of you, he certainly doesn’t expect to find you in such a… compromising situation.
Gar Logan x Fem!Reader x Jason Todd. Accidental Voyeurism. Smut. Canon Divergent AU of Season 2.
Word Count: 2,800
DC Titans Masterlist | AO3 Link
THIS IS A RE-POST. This is a fic from my old blog (a blog that was shadowbanned, forcing me to move). This fic is not stolen, it is completely mine, and I am just re-posting it to help people find my new blog, and to make my masterlist complete when I post new fics for this fandom.
Detailed warnings and author’s notes below the cut.
Warnings: there is a lot of Gar/Jason (emotionally and sexually), dubious consent - Gar listens to the reader and Jason having sex without their consent (but they don’t mind when they do find out), invasion of privacy (but again, they don’t mind it), would this be considered eavesdropping?, accidental voyeurism (and then on purpose voyeurism), Gar masturbates while listening to Jason and the reader have sex over a FaceTime call but Jason and the reader don’t know Gar is listening, Gar feels slightly guilty about being horny in this situation, lots of dirty talk, Jason is more dominant, reader is definitely submissive, Gar is (slightly?) submissive (though he is not ‘involved’ for most of the sex act), the reader uses she/her pronouns and has a vagina (though she is not really the ‘center’ of this fic), Jason has a filthy mouth, p in v sex (between Jason and reader) - actually protected sex this time (which is a surprise for my fics) (it’s my headcanon that Jason is a big proponent for condoms/safe sex), degradation kink (towards the reader), terms used to describe the reader: slutty/slut, cocksleeve, hole, fucktoy/toy, cumdump, good girl; slightly possessive Jason (but it’s clear that he doesn’t mind sharing with Gar), spanking (very light, no severe pain kink) - mention of clit spanking, mention of orgasm restriction, mentions of sexting/sending nudes. I believe that’s everything.
A/N: This is a repost. Again, to complete my Titans Masterlist on this blog. I did some tweaking to it, but it is still mostly the same. So if you have read it before, I hope you enjoy it. And if it’s your first time reading it, I hope you like it again.
...
The concept of butt-dailing was something that still mystified Gar.
He understood why it was a thing in the 2000s, sure. A time when people’s phones still had tactile buttons on them, when you could sit on your phone in your back pocket and start pressing things by accident. But these days? Why was the term even still used?
How can you call someone by accident? How can you have an entire phone conversation with someone by mistake?
On that day, it hadn’t been Jason that called him - no, Gar was the one calling Jason.
Gar hated to admit it, but he was fucking lonely. He had a soft heart and if he went too long without talking to his friends, without hearing their laughter, then he wilted like an unwatered plant. It wasn’t something that he ever said aloud, but it was something that was very easy to tell for the people who were closest to him.
So Jason had taken to calling him on a regular basis. And ironically, because of it, the two had actually grown a lot closer in the Robin’s absence.
Their friendship bloomed because of the long, late-night phone calls where Jason’s tired voice mumbled things to Gar as he fell asleep, admitting things about his past and the pain he sometimes felt that he never would have told anyone else. And they often spent hours on Discord calls as they kicked ass together playing COD or some other stupid game like Mount Your Friends. Even though on that day the Tower was practically empty, Gar found himself missing Jason the most.
Ever since you had gone to Gotham to visit Jason, Gar’s other closest friend abandoning him, Gar had practically gone mad with loneliness. Rachel was off on a ‘girls trip’ with Donna, Dawn, and Kory, and Dick was attending some kind of ‘League’ business. Hank was leading a ‘be a better you’ sobriety seminar in another city, and Gar still found himself feeling like an outsider when hanging out with Rose and Jericho.
So where did that leave him?
Alone in his room, sprawled out on his bed.
He had thumbed over Jason’s contact in his phone several times before he actually decided to put in his earbuds and give the guy a call. Surely his best friend wouldn’t consider him needy after the three hour long timestamps on their other calls. If Jason was busy, Gar could simply find something else to entertain himself. He could probably best his Resident Evil speedruns. Again.
But selfishly, he was hoping Jason would pick up and talk to him for a while. Maybe you would be lounging around with Jason and he would get to talk to the both of you. That would be really nice.
When the FaceTime call was answered on the other end, the screen was dark. Gar thought for a moment that Jason was just busy - that he was pressing his phone to his chest until he could get into another room to take the call. But for a few moments, all he heard was deep breathing, some grunting. The sound of Jason training?
He was definitely inside Jason’s pocket.
See, Jason hadn’t even noticed the incoming call. He had his phone on silent, and he had answered it completely by mistake. Turns out, the rapid, rhythmic thrusting of his hips had somehow successfully pressed the ‘answer’ button, even with the phone shoved deep in his back pocket.
And Jason wasn’t really in a position to have a friendly, ‘let’s chat about COD’ video chat with his best friend.
He was balls-deep inside of you. With his thick, hard cock out through the zipper of his pants with his phone still inside of his back pocket. He was thrusting into you where you were face down on his bed, on your knees exactly how he wanted you.
It was a huge part of the reason you had come to visit him. The two of you had been fooling around for as long as you had known each other, and you couldn’t seem to go for very long without fucking the other person. It brought you both relief from your stressful vigilante lifestyle, and it was the best sex either of you ever had. Not that any of your friends knew that you had a ‘thing’ going on, of course.
Gar was about to hang up the call, believing that he had caught Jason at a bad time and realizing that the guy didn’t even know his phone was on. But he froze completely still when he heard it.
“Fuck, babe, take my cock.” Jason groaned, his voice absolutely thick with sex. “Fucking take it.”
It was something that instantly made Gar tremble, made blood rush to his cock as he heard his friend’s voice in a way that he never had before. The sound was rough in his headphones, distant and not nearly as pure as it would have been in person. But it made Gar’s blood run hot in seconds, made him so turned on so quickly that he became dizzy.
Gar’s hand itched to reach down and grip his cock through his pants, but he knew that he shouldn’t. He knew it was wrong. He should just hang up the call and hope that Jason never saw it in his call history. The longer he stayed there and listened, the more suspicious the timestamp would look in the call history if Jason ever saw it.
But Gar was frozen in his tracks when he heard something that absolutely made his head spin.
“Yes!” It was your voice. “Fuck, I fucking love your cock. I’m just a slutty little cocksleeve for you, Jay!”
High pitched and needy, moaning out - it was you. You, screaming those entirely pornographic words, followed by a deep grunt from Jason.
Gar let out a sharp breath. It hadn’t occurred to him who Jason might be fucking. Or that he was fucking someone at all, and that he wasn’t just alone, fucking his own hand.
Gar almost couldn’t believe that this was happening. The two people that he had been attracted to for so long now, playing out an epic sex fantasy for his own ears. He knew that it was so horribly wrong, but he probably wouldn’t have hung up the call if someone had pointed a gun to his head.
“Yeah, you are.” Jason replied, his voice slightly obscured from the phone being in his pocket. “You’re my perfect slut. Such a good fucktoy, aren’t you, Y/N?”
Jason saying your name with such a deep, possessive need, paired with the way he spoke so confidentially - it forced Gar to imagine how long the two of you had been in a relationship like this. How long the two of you had been playing around behind everyone’s backs to know each other’s kinks so well without crossing any boundaries. Even with his brain so lust-clouded, his thoughts flashed through all of the times you and Jason had snuck off together, or made lame excuses to go to bed early when Jason had still been living at the Tower.
Gar was upset that he hadn’t found out about this sooner. His brain conjured up a fantasy of him sneaking into Jason’s room late at night, and seeing you on your knees for his best friend. He easily imagined Jason inviting him to stay, telling Gar what a slut you were, how much you would love to have two guys at once. Him and Jason passing you around, your wetness making both of their cocks shine. If you were the ‘fucktoy’ that he claimed you to be, it probably wouldn’t be that far from reality.
There was a wet, slapping sound - Jason fucking into you harder as you moaned and struggled for breath.
Gar’s cock pulsed with need.
Something in the back of his brain screamed that it was wrong and that he needed to hang up, but his cock screamed louder. So he untied the string of his pants with haste and racked them down over his aching balls. Just to be safe, he muted his end of the call so that Jason wouldn’t hear any noises he made.
(If he had been thinking a bit clearer, he would have realized that any noise he made, especially echoing into Jason’s back pocket, would have simply gotten lost in the haze of sweat and sex that the two of you were making in Jason’s bedroom. But - better safe than sorry, right?)
In his mind, muting the call seemed even more reasonable when he let out a deep moan the second he took his hard dick into his hand. More beautiful sounds from you and Jason came in through his headphones as he began to jerk himself off.
“Fucking love how you take my cock, fucking love how this slutty pussy gets so wet for me.”
Jason’s dirty mouth continued as Gar’s hand started a steady rhythm. Gar was already leaking precum that easily slicked him up - he was absolutely dizzy at the sound of Jason’s sex-graveled voice.
“Just a fucking hole for me to cum in.” Jason growled. “You love it, don’t you? You love being my fucking toy. My fucking cumdump.”
The pure filth coming out of Jason’s mouth surprised Gar, just as much as his own reaction did. The way his dick jumped in his hand and his lungs released a moan, his tip leaking even more precum at the words. He had no fucking idea that you and Jason were so dirty, that you liked being… degraded so much. Because clearly you loved it, with the wailing moan that you echoed back in response.
“I love it!” You told Jason, your tone desperate and breathy, worn with sex. “I love being your cumdump. I’m just a hole for you to use!”
Gar tried to imagine what the two of you might look like in that moment. Were you on your back, your legs spread wide for Jason? Were you completely naked with your tits swaying with his every thrust? Were you on your hands and knees, ass out like a bitch in heat for Jason?
Gar pumped his cock faster at the thought, his precum making it sound absolutely slick, unrestrained grunts coming from his parted lips as he continued to listen you and Jason fuck. He would feel guilty for this later, but right now, he was absolutely dizzy with lust and needed to hear more.
“You gonna cum on my cock, slut?” Jason’s voice was sharp, demanding.
It sounded like Jason was holding back the urge to cum himself and he needed you to get there first. There was a sharp sound - skin hitting skin, higher in pitch and less muffled than the constant pounding of Jason into your cunt. Jason had spanked you. Gar’s orgasm swelled in his belly as he imagined Jason’s hand coming down against your skin, making the fat of your ass bounce or - fuck, Jason’s hand blooming against your wet clit. (Gar hated that he would never know which it actually was.)
“Be a good girl. Cum for me.” Jason demanded, throat strangling his voice as he drowned in his own arousal.
And just like that, you dissolved into a fury of sounds. Gar caught you chanting ‘I’m a hole! I’m a hole! I’m a hole!’ as though it was the only thing on your mind, increasing in volume as your orgasm overtook you, but it was muffled after a moment and Gar heard Jason grunt the words ‘shut up’ in the most sharp, dangerous voice he had ever heard from his best friend.
Gar’s mind was immediately struck with the picture of Jason’s hand on the back of your head, shoving you into the bed to quiet your whorish moaning, and this was what sent him over the edge. His stomach curled so hard that it practically made him nauseous, his body drawing up off the bed as he pumped his cock hard and fast. He pumped himself dry as cum splashed up over his (thankfully) naked stomach and dirtied him in hot, white waves.
Gar’s body was still trembling when he heard Jason rattle out a shuddering moan, a sure sign that he was cumming too.
Gar should have rushed to end the call.
But it seemed impossible to move at this point - his bones were practically made out of jelly from the intensity of his orgasm. The hand holding the phone had dropped it against his chest, the sound still coming in clear from his earbuds. He was desperate to catch his breath, and his cum still warm against his stomach when he heard it.
There was a shifting, a rustling sound - fuck, Jason was taking his phone out of his pocket.
Gar panicked.
But his orgasm had been so spectacular that it had knocked all the sense out of him, including his usually good reflexes, so he was slow to pick his phone back up. When he did, his heart jumped in his chest when he found Jason staring at him, wearing a wide smirk.
In the time it had taken Gar to recover, Jason had taken his phone out - with the original purpose to check the time. Alfred always had a very specific time for dinner, and always became cranky if anyone was late. Jason certainly didn’t need anyone to come looking for you and him, seeing the compromising position that you found yourselves in.
Jason was surprised when he found the call with Gar going. And once he had checked the timestamp on the still ongoing call, he immediately knew what had happened.
“Did you enjoy the show?” Jason said, his voice slightly rough from the sex, but entirely confident, unshaken.
“Uh - I - I -” Gar stuttered.
When Jason saw his lips moving and didn’t hear any sound, he quickly spoke up.
“Unmute the call, dickhead.” Jason told him, giving a small chuckle with the offensive, affectionate nickname.
Right. Gar had muted it to participate in his perverted voyeurism.
As Gar reached up to find the button, he realized his hand was still covered in cum.
Jason licked his lips as he saw substance smeared all over Gar’s palm and saw his friend reaching for tissues off to the side. As Gar raced to clean off his hand, you appeared behind Jason’s shoulder in the frame of the call. You were wearing a bra, your skin slightly slicked with sweat and tear tracks coming off the side of your eyes - clearly from pleasure and not from pain.
“You had Gar on a FaceTime call?” Your tone was a breathy giggle, clearly not at all upset at the idea that your friend had been listening in on you being fucked and called degrading names. “Kinky. Did you call him while you were putting the condom on?”
Gar unmuted the call with his now clean(er) hand, but waited in silence for you and Jason to finish your conversation. He was surprised that you didn’t seem to care; that you seemed to think it was some kind of pre-planned kink that Jason had executed. Gar’s stomach twisted at the thought of it, that you and Jason had discussed inviting another person into your sex life and you were more than okay with it being Gar.
“Don’t worry your pretty little head about it.” Jason told you. “Go get cleaned up for dinner.”
You simply nodded, and leaned in to give Jason a kiss - a soft, gentle sight that was entirely arousing in contrast to the rough, filthy sex that Gar knew the two of you just had. It was even more arousing when you walked out of frame and Gar heard another spank to your bare skin (clearly you weren’t wearing bottoms) - and heard you let out a delighted squeak in response.
“Look, I can explain-” Gar began his groveling, but Jason quickly cut him off.
“Quiet.” Jason said, his tone taking on a kind of authority that made Gar’s stomach jump. “Next time this happens, we get to watch you cum, or you don’t get to cum at all. Got it?”
Gar’s cock was quickly filling with blood again at Jason speaking to him this way, so boldly, making sexual demands over his body. His mouth was dry and lost for words so he simply nodded in response. He opened his mouth to attempt to speak - to apologize, to ask for clarity, to ask Jason when ‘the next time’ would be.
But now that Jason had Gar’s simple affirmation, he hung up the call.
Gar - unable to help himself - stretched an arm out and took a picture of his half hard cock and his shirtless body, still covered in his cum. He hesitated to send it, though. After a long mental debate in the shower, it came back to his phone sitting on his nightstand, and sent it to Jason with a caption that read ‘I really did enjoy the show’.
It pinged Jason’s phone when he was sitting at the dinner table with you and Bruce. And as he looked at it under the table, he choked on his peas.
#sundrop writes#dc titans#titans fanfiction#titans x reader#dc titans fanfiction#gar logan x reader#gar logan#garfield logan#garfield logan x reader#jason todd#jason todd x y/n#jason todd x you#jason todd imagine#jason todd x reader#jason todd smut#jaygar x reader
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do you have a list of good CoD fanfics, or favorite writers in general?? <3
Presented in no particular order, here are some of my personal faves / fics I really enjoyed, and my own summaries for them. Hopefully you enjoy, thanks for the ask, anon!!!
I didn't tag all the authors because I'm not sure if they all have tumblrs, but also I'm shy tagging people ahjdfhkaheje. If any authors here are mentioned tho and you have a tumblr, feel free to lmk and I can update this post to include your tag!!:)
Anything rated mature I colour coded the name in red, and anything explicit green. Not all the mature fics feature smut, but yeah! I didn't want to link anything tooooo explicit here, but if anyone wants any, I can definitely rb this post to add a few more 😅
Also, just beware the tags on any of these fics because some feature kind of heavy subject matter. 👍
COF FIC REC LIST:
A Very MacTavish Christmas - @m3rrywe4ther
Prob my fav fic in the fandom lololol. HUGE RECCOMMEND. It's about Johnny who gets roped into spending the holiday Christmas season with his , for the most part, very not so nice family, and Simon accompanies him. So much stuff happens in this fic and it's such a great character exploration of Simon and Johnny independently, but also as a couple, and just so much stuff happens in it lol again, HUGE RECOMMEND!!!
We'll make Death Proud to Take us - Literal_Satan
Fic where, it starts off really sweet where Simon goes to Scotland with Johnny to spend Christmas with him and his family, but things take a drastic turn when Soap's brother, a police officer/detective, gets a little too curious about mysterious Simon, and the story spirals from there. All the guys end up on this crazy goose chase tracking down some of the people who were involved in Roba's brainwashing operations. The fic gets v dark at times and deals with some very heavy trauma so beware, but it's SO. GOOD.
Dream a Little Dream - Angelicasdean
Again, one of my total fav fics in the fandom!! AU where Simon leaves the army to raise his nephew Joseph, who's the sole survivor of the Riley family massacre, and Johnny is one of the daycare teachers at the daycare where Simon takes Jo 🥺🥺👍👍
Pretend to love me like I do - FetteEule
Really cute fic of Simon who accompanied Johnny to Scotland for his sister's wedding, under the ruse they are dating. They are v much pining but not there yet. Features lots of really cute domestic moments and Simon being really sweet to Johnny's kid nephew 😭🧡
Something important - Anonymous
One of the fics that has me totally brainrotted rn. It's about Simon's who's been de-aged to 6 years old, and Price, Gaz and Soap all taking care of him and trying to figure out how he got turned, and how to turn him back! They all get tested on their abilities to care for a child, and unwillingly learn a lot of details about Simon's childhood they never knew. This summary doesn't do it justice tho, so I'd just recommend checking it out! Beware tho again, there is some dark childhood trauma stuff but there are warnings at the start of each chapter that contains references to it.
Seasons - StinglessWasp
In this fic every chapter is set during a different season and tells a unique sort of story/mission/interaction Soap and Ghost have. Definitely some v good angst&hurt/comfort stuffs too. Starts off pre-relationship, and explores their characters a lot! It's just really good HUGE reccommend lol.
What the Eyes Don't see - WhiplashRogue
One of my FAVESSSS! So the premise is like, Soap can actually see ghosts ever since he was a child (which most other people can't see and also don't believe in), and Ghost has 2 spirits attached to him that follow him around(Joseph, and Roach). The fic starts off pre relationship, and it mostly about Soap trying to learn more about these two spirits and discovering more about Ghost's past.
All that's said in the Low Light - Headlocket
Probably one of the most emotional I've ever read LMFAO. It's about Johnny, who receives a back & knee injury bad enough he gets discharged from the army, and is back in Scotland living with his parents as he recovers. He and Ghost lost contact a bit since the accident, and it's sort of a story of them reconnecting. This description doesn't do it justice, just read it, but it will emotionally destroy you lol
Time Loops Suck (series) - Enter_fand0m_reference00
The first installment of the fic takes the idea that Soap is stuck in a time loop during the alone mission! And all the optional dialogues and interactions in thE alone mission are separate attempts of his trying to survive the loops and rendez vous with Ghost. It's just sooo good!! And then there's a follow up fic where it deals with the mental aftermath of the loops and Ghost comforting soap through it, then there's 2 other installments of Simon who instead goes through a time loop! They are such great character explorations in how both Soap and Ghost experience the loops, and I whooleee heartedly reccommend.
Yellow Card - SkerryB
Soccer au fic!! It's so good! Simon is the captain of a soccer team Soap is drafted to as their new goalie. Simon has had a history with Soap before though, that he was the only goalie Simon could never score on! So that's how it starts, and it's just so good from there!! Simon's family are also alive in the fic and his nephew is adorable.
You swept me off my feet - @ghoulishhone
Ghost is down bad for strong Soap, the fic xD This was a fic Ghoulishone and I were paired together to work on for the Ghostsoap server reverse bang! They wrote the fic and I made some accompanying art. Just a cute fic of Soap having to pick up Ghost after he gets injured and some other shenanigans that ensues:)
Dear Mr Ghost - @shortcuts-make-long-delays
SUCH A CUTE FIC!! The majority of the fic is these letter/pen pal exchanges between Ghost, and Soap's young niece Chloe...it's just. So. Good. And was written by a friend of mine too! BIG RECCOMMEND.
Give me Hope and Let me Down - MechanicalBones
Some of the best Ghost whump I read lolll. Ghost is captured by some people with ties to Roba and tortured. Meanwhile Soap is on his way to rescue him, and eventually he does, and there's a lot of hurt and comfort. It's also a getting together fic. 🥺
Unspoken Love - Hammy101
( Super amazing oneshot. I feel I can't do this fic justice with any summary. Just read it. 🥺 It has decent Ghost whump AND domestic off duty cute ghost soap angsty stuff it's just one of my faves ever!!!!)
Except You, You can Stay - Iravaid
Really realistic, believable portrayal and expansion upon a lot of the key events that happen in the Ghost comics. From his childhood, to the mental aftermath of Roba, his family dying...it's heavy but really really good. And has a happier hopeful ending that's Ghost/Soap 🥺
Hat Trick of the Heart and the sequel Family, Gotta Love em - Librarian_FanFicFan
Absolutely am obsessed with these fics!!! It's an AU about Ghost who is recently discharged from the military due to injury, and on a flight back to London where he is seated next to Soap, a famous footballer/soccer player. Ghost doesn't know who he is tho, but they hit it off and exchange numbers. The second installment features Simon's family!!! And Tommy being dramatic and shocked over the fact his brother got the number of this famous sports player... SUPER CUTE IF YOU LIKE RILEY FAMILY STUFF.
As for my fav CoD authors I wholeheartedly recommend anything by:
RedClegane, m3rrywe4ther, Hammy101, TheEdwardianOne, Iravaid, and so many authors but I can't list them all ahaha...but hopefully this is a good start!
Hopefully this helps anon! Sorry it took me a while.
#call of duty#fanfiction#ghostsoap fanfic#call of duty fanfiction#fanfic#call of duty fanfiction rec list#reccommendation list#fic recs#cod fic recs#call of duty fic recs#ghostsoap#soapghost#soapghost fanfic#journen speaks#mw2#cod mw2 fanfic#modern warfare 2#mw3#modern warfare 3#cod fic rec list
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Ghost x Reader x Konig: I Don't Need You (Ch. 10)
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Summary: Thankfully, things have been resolved between you and Konig. You start to settle in more with your team, and Roze shares a few thoughts with you over a smoke. The memories are still there, but just like the winter around you, they're cold and unwelcoming. You and Konig open up to each other a bit more, more than you had ever opened up to anyone.
WARNINGS: implications of masturbation, cursing, angst (if you squint?), plot building, graphic depictions of animal torture and death (PLEASE CONSIDER ALL WARNINGS BEFORE READING THIS, I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE MEDIA YOU CONSUME thank you kindly)
Notes: Yes! Hello! I exist!! I've been in a slump, and I really do apologize for that. Many of you have been very patient with me and I love and appreciate you all for it! I had to intake as much CoD literature as I could in the past few weeks to get me motivated, which helped a LOT (not to mention I discovered no fewer than ten works that currently have a hold on my heart). But it's here! I forced myself to write over half of the following chapter so that it would be less daunting to finish up. I also plan to make a wip post for yall, just to share will everyone what goes on in my rat brain.
This was edited at 3 am (god it's 4 am now, i just saw that), so if there are any grammatical or spelling errors you have my full consent to call me out on it! Please enjoy!
(sidenote, I completely didn't research how old you need to be to become a navy SEAL, so reader's age is a bit inaccurate in regards to that. pls ignore lol)
(last sidenote then you can read, does anyone have tips for customizing the layout of their fics? I see so many cool ways to style the font and cute banners and errything but I have no idea how nor what to do)
- - - -
The sky hung low with a blanket of gray. It looked like it was about to snow, although the threat was soon dismissed when noon came around and there wasn’t a single flake. The air was cold and dry, forcing me to zip my jacket up all the way and tuck my nose into the collar. I blew steady, warm breaths into my jacket and tried to soak up the heat into my bones.
It was as if the incident had never happened.
Konig and I ended up driving to the liquor store, which was a blessing, since I had run out of Yeungling (and I didn’t understand enough Turkish to converse with the clerk, nor did I have any of the appropriate money – Konig was graced with both of those necessities). We talked like there had never been a week and a half of silence between us. He talked about how he had nearly forced Ridgeback to drag me out of my room and into the common area, “… but it would have been too early for that.” He commented. That, and I would have rather died.
So life went on as normal: dreary, aside from shooting people and getting shot at. Nonetheless, it was normal, and there was a peace to be found in that.
I leaned against the building to the training room, with Roze to my left. I had intended to come out and soak up whatever natural light I could – when I saw her standing there, possibly trying to do the same, I felt the instinct to play it off as if I was just leaving the building. But she cocked her head in a greeting, and a part of me took an interest in her worry-free aura. Out of everyone, she always seemed to be the least-stressed person in the room, even in the middle of a warzone. It was the balm to my anxious mind that I never knew I needed, but gratefully stood by.
We remained together in a comfortable silence (one I would most definitely would not have been comfortable with a while ago), staring ahead, watching the indecisiveness of the brooding clouds above. I wondered what the rest of the world was doing – if they might have been as calm and carefree as us, or if they were in some kind of peril, and the horrors of it were blocked out by the clouds.
I was drawn back to the present when I heard the click click click of Roze’s lighter. I turned my head and watched as she shielded the weak flame from the wind, lighting the cigarette that hung loosely from her lips.
“You smoke?” I asked.
“Sure do.” She replied nonchalantly. “Want one?” she extended her pack of cigarettes towards me.
I glanced at the box, feeling a sour taste in my mouth.
I lay on my stomach, my muscles still twitching and shaking as I tried to even out my breaths. Ghost had tossed a thin blanket over my lower half. I hadn’t even moved from the position he had ruthlessly fucked me in – my body ached too much to even try, and my mind was still recovering from the past hour.
I watch Ghost as he reclined next to me, pushing the bottom of his mask up to place a cigarette between his lips. It was the first time I had seen any part of his face all day. He grabbed his lighter from the pocket of his pants that were discarded on the floor, lighting the end of the cigarette and inhaling. He tossed the lighter back down to the floor as he tilted his head back, exhaling a long stream of smoke. I watched it swirl in the lamplight, settling in a cloud around us. He continued puffing, staring at the wall across from the bed as I lay beside him, although I felt worlds away from him.
He'd started off the night with a mountain of stress from a mission gone sideways. Instead of the usual slow build, where he would run his hands under my shirt and kiss my lips slowly and tenderly – he had walked in and immediately demanded I remove my clothes while he began stripping out of his. I had assumed tonight was going to be a passionate one, until he threw me onto my stomach and shoved my face into the pillows. It wasn’t the first time he’d been rough with me, but it wasn’t just rough – it felt dehumanizing. An hour of constant, merciless thrusts, and a hand around my neck that restricted both my blood flow and my oxygen, and I had fallen into a state of shock.
But, in the end, I was happy to be caged in by him again.
I was happy.
He turned his eyes towards me, seeming to sense that something was off. He exhaled another puff of smoke. “Everythin’ alright?” he asked, completely void of any genuine concern.
I met his eyes with my own. I felt like I shouldn’t have to answer the question, and it stirred up a bitterness in me. But I didn’t feel like arguing with him, and I certainly didn’t want him to leave – so I nodded my head, slowly blinking my eyes. “Just tired.”
He hummed and faced the wall again. He brought one of his knees up and rested his arm against it. “Want a smoke?” he asked, still looking away.
I shook my head as much as the pillow beneath me would allow. “No.” I replied.
He sighed disappointedly. Apparently, my lack of enthusiasm after being used like an old fucktoy was irking him.
To be fair, I never spoke up about how I felt.
He grunted and rose from his position, snuffing out his cigarette in the ashtray by my bed, and picking up his clothes and pulling them on. My heart ached slightly as I watched him slide his shirt over his torso. I felt the threat of tears sting in my eyes as I wished his hands were holding me instead, keeping me warm and grounded. He pulled his jeans on and fastened them, buckling his belt rather quickly; and all while he faced away from me.
“Well, I know you probably need some alone time.” He muttered, sliding the skull attachment over his mask. “So I’ll get going. I’ll see you around.”
He grabbed his tactical vest and jacket and slung them over his shoulder. He paused by the door. “Thanks for tonight.” He mumbled, before finally leaving the room and softly closing the door behind him.
My eyes lingered on the ashtray with the half-smoked cigarette. A thin trail of smoke plumed into the air – I wanted to throw the tray across the room and shatter it. But it was Ghost’s, so I couldn’t; I couldn’t regardless, because it was a piece of him that remained with me, even when he left.
That, and the smell of smoke.
“Nah, I’m good.” I replied, facing the cold, empty base ahead of me.
“Good.” She said, pinching the cigarette and blowing a stream of smoke. “Stay that way. Did you know these bastards give you cancer?”
I chuckled into the collar of my jacket. “Do they, now?”
She hummed affirmatively, sucking another breath in through the cancerous bastard. “Who would’ve thought…”
We fell back into silence. I continued watching the stillness of the base, trying to see if the sky would follow through with its promise to fall. Now that my free time wasn’t spent holed up in my room, it somehow felt like there were fewer ways to spend it. With another mission on the horizon – a simple recon, yet dauntingly close to a heavily-guarded compound – no one was out and about when they usually were. Finding Roze outside and seemingly not worried was usual, however, and a warm sight, compared to how the rest of the team was on edge. Even Askel seemed grumpier than most days.
I hadn’t been seeking out someone to spend time with, no… that I would never do (or admit). But talking to a familiar face provided a comfort I had grown to need over the past couple of months. And, frankly, I felt like Konig might be getting tired of how much I ran to him when I craved social interaction. Though he had never said anything about it, I felt like I needed to branch out to other team members than just my Colonel. One might think I was trying to kiss his ass (I knew the accusation had already crossed Juno’s mind, but the young soldier was good at holding his tongue – when Konig was around, at least).
“You ever think about how ‘little girl’ you would react to this?” Roze asked, and I turned to face her. She had her nose scrunched, and a tinge of pink dusted over her cold cheeks. “Guns, war, no playdates or days at the beach…”
I sighed. “Probably would have cried.” I replied, allowing my freezing nose to poke over the collar of my jacket. “Especially if I had known that being a princess now adays meant spending more time worrying about becoming a hostage than anything else.”
Roze chuckled. “It’s a good thing we didn’t know then.” Her face was mostly blank, but I thought I noticed a hint of bitterness in the way her gaze landed on the ground. I watched her flick her cigarette with a bit more aggression than usual. “I would’ve tried to convince my entire family to run away to Scotland, live in hiding and pretend the rest of the world was a dream.”
“Scotland?” I asked. Soap’s cocky grin and heavy Scottish accent stirred in my mind, but it felt like nothing more than a small cloud of dust.
“Yeah – heard it’s fucking gorgeous over there.” She waved her cigarette in no particular direction. “Now, I don’t know how peaceful it is in terms of politics and war, but it’s pretty spacious. Simple, too. I feel like if I talked about throwing all my shit away and becoming a fisherman for a living, I wouldn’t get people trying to talk me out of it like I would in the States.” She took another drag, and laughed out the smoke.
“Fisherman?”
“Yeah.” She chuckled, a hardened smile gracing her lips. “I don’t know why it sounds so appealing… it just does.”
I hummed and looked back out at the compound. I wondered about Roze’s past; she had never said or done anything to indicate that it was particularly rough, as it was for the majority of us (us – I still wasn’t used to including myself, but it was becoming more of a habit each time), but the weariness in her eyes when she spoke about her younger self made me question what that girl had been through. Maybe it was just nostalgia. A yen for simpler times. Roze seemed to appreciate the simple things in life.
“You know Askel goes ice fishing?” she said suddenly.
I smiled underneath my jacket. “Seems like something he would do.”
“Every winter.” She continued. She dropped her cigarette to the floor and crushed it into the gravel. “He takes about three weeks of leave, if we’re lucky enough to get it, and goes to Norway. Sits on a frozen lake for hours a day, just waiting for a fish.”
“You make it sound like he’s never caught one.” I point out, my eyes lingering on the cigarette.
She shrugged her shoulders. “So does he. Every time I ask him what he caught, he just laughs. Says he’s never expects to get a bite.”
I closed my eyes and hummed in response. It was easy to picture the scene – Askel, sitting on a thick layer of ice, nursing the hoppy beers that he and Konig loved so much and waiting for a fish to bite. I wondered if he even bothered to reel the line in when he did catch something. Or if he even went fishing at all. Maybe he just went out there to get a sense of peace, to pretend that war and death didn’t exist.
The motion of thick, heavy snowflakes falling from the sky caught my attention. They landed on the skin of my nose, resisting the warmth for a few moments, before they eventually melted into trickles of water. A sudden gust of wind blew a flurry of them towards us, making the both of us flinch.
Maybe fishing doesn’t sound too bad.
- - - -
The shooting range was mostly silent, save for the occasional conversation between me and Konig. The lights were low, easily illuminating the gunpowder and dust swirling in the air. Konig and I stared at the paper target as we analyzed my shots. A few hit dead center, although most of them were clustered around the lower left of the bullseye. My lips were pursed into a scowl as I glared at my sub-par aim – it wasn’t typically so awful, but of course it was while Konig had been watching.
“Eh, are you sure you didn’t lie on your paperwork about being a sniper?” Konig asked as he stood behind my left shoulder, taking the target from my hands and looking at it closely. “You weren’t even ten yards from it. This is very poor marksmanship.”
I scowled in embarrassment, taking my pistol to the counter and pulling out the mag. “Rough day.” I answered bluntly as I started packing more bullets into the small compartment. It wasn’t a lie – I had barely gotten any sleep the night before. I was in the middle of a rather interesting dream involving me and Ghost, until my alarm woke me up before anything of importance happened.
“Very bad…” he mumbled to himself. I clicked my tongue in annoyance.
“Y’know…” I grumbled, loading the mag back into the gun and shoving it in my holster, “I don’t like stereotyping, but the boot really does fit you.” I walked past him and out into the hallway, not waiting for him to follow.
“Hmm?” he made an indignant noise, momentarily stuck in his spot, before he came jogging after me. “What does that mean? What stereotype?”
I chuckled. “Haven’t you ever how Germans are extremely blunt?” I asked.
“Austrian.” He retorted. “Do I need to brand that onto my face for you?”
“Wouldn’t do me much good, with the mask ‘n all.” I replied.
He laughed – rather snorted, as usual – “Ah, you’re right. Maybe I am blunt – just as much as you are defensive.”
I stopped at the end of the hall, right in front of the exit. “Defe-“ I turned on my heel to scowl at him. “I am not defensive! Where did you get that idea?!”
He stopped behind me, his eyes widening. He gestured an open palm in my direction. “This.”
I huffed, turning back around to punch the door open. The snow from earlier that day had ceased, blanketing the base in a thin layer of white. The moon seemed that much brighter against the crystalized ground, and the yellow lights scattered across the compound made parts of the snow look like sandy dunes. My nose tingled from the nip of the chilly air, and I pulled my jacket tighter around my body as the door fell shut behind me and Konig.
“Well, what am I supposed to say when you call me defensive?”
“You could agree.”
“But I don’t.”
“Which proves my point.”
I huffed in frustration, despite the smirk curling on the edges of my lips. “So, either I have to agree with you, whether I really do or don’t, or you’ve corralled me into a paradox.”
I can practically hear the gears turning in his head. “A what?”
“A paradox, like a – y’know, never mind. It’s too difficult to explain.” I let him fall in step next to me, although he was the one who needed to slow down to match my pace. “We can just agree to disagree, how’s that?”
“Agreed.” He nodded, and I chuckled. “It won’t change the fact that I’m right, you know.” He added.
I bit my lip and tried to keep my smile from growing ridiculously larger. I looked up at him and patted his shoulder – he looked down at me, and the corners of his eyes crinkled as he smiled back. A stray, reddish-brown curl poked through the side of his balaclava, and I found the miniscule detail warming my heart through the cold air. He felt real, and in this moment, too human for this kind of life.
“Why did you choose the military?” I asked, turning back to look at the ground as we walked.
He hummed. “Isn’t that every boy’s dream?”
“Well, yes – but most of the time, it never becomes more than that.” I responded.
He shoved his hands into his pockets, mimicking my own position. “I’m not really sure what made me push so much for it. I almost didn’t make it, for obvious reasons.”
I chuckled. “Size does matter, huh?”
He looked down at me with a deadpan gaze, one that I refused to meet. “It almost did, in a bad way. And I almost backed out before they could be the ones to turn me away. But, of course, they knew they would find some use for my size – so they took me in.”
“And what did they do with you?” I asked, looking back at him.
“A ‘human battering ram,’ as my superiors had so nicely called it.” He framed the description with his hands in the air, as if it had been written on a plaque. I laughed and looked back down at my feet.
“Seriously?” I asked. “So they just had you breaking down doors, and then what?”
Konig laughed with me. “Well, I still had a gun, so I was able to shoot, thank goodness. And I had a bit more gear so I wouldn’t break my bones against the doors – I still dislocated my shoulder a few times, however…” he rolled his left shoulder, as if there was still a lingering pain from how often he had thrown himself at doors. “It was actually during a period of recovery when I proved that I could still be a sniper. My shoulder was still healing, so I had to give up being a battering ram for a while. I was sat with Horangi on the side of the mountain to give him cover. Of course, he was ambushed – he had to fight the Arschgiege right when we were given the order to shoot, so I had to take position behind the gun.” I noticed that his chest was puffed out a bit from pride. “That really knocked their pants off.”
I chuckled, choosing to ignore the inaccuracy of his phrase. “Did it now?”
“It did.” He replied, then looked at the ground. “For a moment. I got a good earful for overstepping boundaries that day, but it’s what ultimately landed me here – so I’m grateful for it.”
I nodded and hummed. “What was Horangi picked for?”
Konig shrugged, his hands now back in his pockets. “He never said what he and Commander had spoken about in his office. But, even if he wasn’t chosen – I like to think we come as a package. If I go, he goes, if he doesn’t, I don’t.”
I felt my heart warm at his words. The memory of how Juno had described Konig couldn’t be farther from my mind. It almost felt like I was talking to someone I briefly crossed paths with in my youth – not a war criminal, not the bloody and stiff soldier who had stepped onto the heli after our first mission. I envied his ability to separate his work stress from the time he had in between missions.
“Why did you decide to join?” He asked, catching me off guard.
It was only fair that I opened up to him, since he was so willing to do the same. Always the one to go first, too. But I had to be careful. I didn’t want this to turn into a pity party, and I didn’t want to dig anything up that I had worked so hard to bury deep beneath my subconscious.
“I was… a weird kid. Like you.” I said, making Konig scoff and roll his eyes. “Looking back now, I hate my younger self. I was so sensitive to what people thought about me, and I just wanted to be independent and strong. I wanted to be a ‘different girl.’” I gritted out the words that left a sour taste in my mouth. “I think I just wanted attention at first – of course, when I heard how everyone said they hated how annoying teenage girls were, and how gullible and weak they were, it just – it made me change. I wanted to prove everyone wrong, it wasn’t just about being different anymore. So, as soon as I turned old enough, I enlisted. Didn’t get to Navy SEAL right away, of course… but I joined every program I was allowed in until I could submit my application.”
I sighed, then chuckled. “Thought my family would say they were proud, that I was successful, that I was doing a good job… they were just angry. Said I was throwing my life away for business that didn’t involve our country.” I opened my mouth to say more, but I ended up scoffing and closing it once again. I felt like I had shared enough.
I looked at Konig, expecting him to acknowledge what I said. “That’s how the story goes…” he would say. But, when I met his gaze, I only saw concern. His brow was creased with what I imagined was pity, and my stomach churned. It was the exact opposite of the reaction I had hoped for. I only wanted to share stories with him, and now it was… this.
“I think you made the right choices.” He said, and I looked away.
“You don’t need to make me feel better, Konig. I appreciate it, but-“
“I’m not just trying to make you feel better.” He said, his accent slightly thicker from his exasperation. “You’re good at what you do. Your parents are just probably worried for you, and they don’t know how to show it.”
I bit down on my tongue, my eyes settling on the building in front of us with a hard expression. If only.
“Maybe that’s it.” I muttered, hoping he would drop the subject. He seemed to understand, and turned to look ahead with a disappointed sigh. My heart sank the tiniest bit at the sound, and I internally scolded myself. Still a people-pleaser, apparently.
We continued walking in silence, the buzz of the lights above us mimicking the static of a communication system that had been severed in a time where it was needed most. The edge of the barracks appeared into our view, just around the corner of the arsenal sheds that stood between us and our destination. I continued to stare at the ground, pretending to watch my steps and try to not slip on the snowy asphalt. My heart twisted with each second of silence that sat thickly between us. It wasn’t technically a fight, but somehow, it felt worse. It felt like the first time I had pissed him off, the first time we had spoken to each other – and god, did I already hate myself for the way I had acted towards him during those first few weeks. I didn’t want to drive another wedge between us, not after the ones that had already been worked back out.
I exhaled heavily through my nose. “Sorry.” I mumbled quietly, but loud enough that I knew it reached his ears. “Sensitive topics.”
He flitted his eyes in my direction, but didn’t bother to move his head. He sighed, and I nearly jolted when I felt his wide hand on my upper back. It rubbed back and forth, and it took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that he was comforting me. Or, trying to, at least.
“I know.” He said, and his hand rested on my shoulder. “I’m sorry for pushing you.”
I didn’t know how to respond. I was stuck on the feeling of the roughness of his palm, which I could gleam through the fabric of my jacket. How his fingers squeezed gently and released twice. There was no hidden meaning, no forced contact or any kind of attempt to put context into the touch. It was… natural. Warm, comforting, and it spoke a thousand words that I wouldn’t have been able to stomach if he had said them. It broke past my self-hatred and walls of ‘don’t be weak’ that I would have used as my defense if he had tried to verbally convey any sort of consolation. It was the first time I didn’t feel awkward about being so close to him, let alone when he was touching me. I wondered if he did this on purpose, or if he had no idea what he was doing at all.
I let myself stand nearer to him, almost tucked under his arm. I looked up and smiled as genuinely as I could – not that it was hard for me, but because I wanted to make sure that he really knew how much I appreciated the gesture. Although, if he knew that this simple act of comfort would pierce through my outer shell, was it really necessary?
“Thank you, Konig.” I said.
He looked down at me and smiled. That damn smile. I wondered how much more refreshing it would be when he wasn’t wearing his mask. It was already too much for my soul to bear when it was just the crinkling in his eyes that I could see.
“Anytime, Bonnie.” He replied, patting my shoulder before tucking his hand back into his pocket. I grieved minimally at the loss of the touch, but I was happy for what it was. “And I mean it. Anytime you need to talk – or not talk, and do that empty staring that you do – just come find me.”
I quirked an eyebrow in his direction. “Anytime?” I asked amusedly.
“Mhm!” Konig replied, his eyes on the ground as he watched his steps. Then, the realization hit him, and his eyes went wide with panic. “Oh- well, eh- I guess, not anytime-“
“You gonna tell me when?” I joked, and he laughed. “You need an open/closed sign on your door.” I jogged ahead, trying to reach the door to the barracks before he did.
“How about this?” he called out, and I could hear the grin behind his mask. “I’ll nail a chalkboard to my door, and if I’m busy, I’ll draw a stick guy jerking off in his bed!”
My cheeks burned after I heard him. “No!” I shrieked, laughing nervously. “You’ll traumatize Juno!” I quickly tried to pin this on someone other than me.
“Juno, hah?” Konig teased, and I had half a mind to run into the building and leave him on the quad. “I don’t care about him. Kid needs to be traumatized.”
I laughed and threw my head back, turning the corner around the arsenal shed. “That’s not very-“
Immediately, my heart leapt into my throat, and I gasped. Konig nearly ran into my back as he skidded to a halt.
Sick, sick, what the fuck, I feel sick-
“Stimmt etwas nicht?” he asked, concerned. “What- oh, scheisse-“
We both stared at the bird on the ground. A crow from the looks of it, though it was hard to even decipher that it was a bird in the first place, due to the state it was in. Its belly had been cut open, entrails and bloody bits pulled from the abdomen and strewn to either side of the bird. Its wings were stretched to their full capacity and most likely beyond it, crushed and missing a large number of feathers. Both of the legs appeared to have been ripped off and tossed to the left of the crow. Its beak was the worst of it all: pried open, the jaw probably broken from how wide it was spread. A haunting look of terror in the crow’s red, glossy eyes made a violent shiver run up my spine.
I exhaled shakily, my eyes still glued to the horror. “Holy shit – what the-“
Konig quickly walked around me and knelt in front of the crow. I shifted to look over his shoulder, still fearfully curious, but he held a hand out behind him, urging me to stay in place. With his other hand, he pulled at one of the bird’s wings, stiff and heavy. Whether it was frozen from the cold, or this was the effects from rigor mortis, I couldn’t tell.
“How – did a fucking fox do that?!” I asked. Are there even foxes in this area? How the hell did one get on base?
“Nein.” Konig replied, still looking at the corpse. His gaze fell upon it with a sense of… familiarity, maybe? “Not a fox, no.”
“Then what? It – whatever it was didn’t even eat-“
“I’ll take care of this.” Was all Konig said. He stood up and marched past me – I was barely able to catch a glimpse of his furious expression. His eyes were hard and narrow, and as he walked away, I noticed that his shoulders were tense and his hands were balled into fists. I didn’t dare say anything to him; he almost looked the same way he did after our first mission together, except this time, his anger seemed to be directed at something, instead of just a post-mission adrenaline high.
“I’ll see you later.” He said over his shoulder. There was an obvious fury to his words, and although I knew it wasn’t intended towards me, it still made me freeze where I stood – almost as if I might anger him more simply by taking a step after him.
Whatever it is… I thought, watching him disappear into the compound, he’s sorting it out. I can take care of myself. Although, with such an abrupt and tense departure, I was at a loss on what to do next. I looked back at the bird; its terrified eyes locked onto the sky above it, frozen in its last wish to fly away from whatever horror it endured.
A shiver ran up my spine, prompting me to look away.
- - - -
Taglist: @igotmajordaddyissues @princekonig @vixionix @v3lv3tvampir3 @theoneandonlykymberlee @luvvnightingalee @dillybuggg @sun-joo @perfectus-in-morte @evilive @satakingslime @comfortless
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#konig x reader#konig x reader smut#konig cod#konig smut#call of duty#cod x reader#ghost x reader#ghost x reader smut#ghost cod#cod#konig#ghost#simon ghost riley#simon riley#simon riley x reader
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☁️Goalie | AngryGinge13
Summary: Ginge has had an online crush on a streamer which had been made very public on his streams - and landed him a chance to play alongside her in the Sidemen 2023 Charity Match... But when he sees her, does he get flustered and crumble under the embarrassment of everything he's said - or only take it in his stride and make it his goal of making something of this opportunity to flirt with her in real life?
Notes: Based on 2023 SDMN Charity match, v cutesy fic + LONG 8.3k wordcount so ENJOY!!
"Wouldn't it be funny if we got Y/n on the pitch as well?" Simon asked over one Sidecast. Josh, JJ, Vik and surprise guest: Danny Aarons all cracked up.
"You know Ginge has a proper big crush on her?" Danny brought up.
"Are you leaking information?" JJ asked, looking between Danny and Simon. "Can't be leaking Ginge's super secret crush to the entirety of the internet, can you..."
"No, there's clips of him online- look-"
One of the producers cast a TikTok to the screen behind the boys- watching the video of Ginge looking through his for you page during a stream: "IT'S HER AGAIN!" Ginge jumped out of his seat as a TikTok clip of you raging to COD popped up. Although clearly the gameplay wasn't what caught Ginge's attention, as he paused the video and ogled at your facecam before exclaiming: "IS SHE WEARING A UNITED SHIRT?!?!!?" Simon chuckled at Ginge's reaction as he watched the United-fanboy celebrate over his online-crush's attire. Ginge fell off of his chair and onto the floor dramatically, clutching a hand to his heart as he exclaimed "CHAT, HELP ME PLEASE, I NEED TO WIFE UP Y/N IMMEDIATELY- WHY DOES NOBODY ELSE SEE HOW PERFECT SHE IS?!"
JJ giggled as the clip ended with Ginge squirting water on his face to face to cool himself down, clearly flustered seeing you on the screen wearing the beloved United shirt.
"Can you imagine the scenes if we got her to play?" Josh's brain began ticking as he swivelled around to look at the other boys' faces. Vik and Simon could tell by the expression on his face that Josh was clearly trying to figure out how they could make it work, how they could get you playing on the pitch for that day as well.
"Can you imagine how Ginge would react seeing her on the pitch," Vik chuckled, having watched a compilation of Ginge on the SidemenReacts channel just the other day. "He might have a heart attack seeing her in real life after everything he's said about her online."
The boys within the room all shared a look, grins plastered wide on their faces at the idea of getting Y/n on the same pitch as Ginge for the charity match- and Josh knew exactly what he had to do to get that plan sorted.
----
"Y/n, you coming to the match on Saturday?" You saw JJ's face on the phone as you answered the call, angling the screen away from the webcam so that the stream couldn't see the JJ's number. It was currently a gloomy Thursday and you were counting on that match to bring a bit of light to your week.
"Yeah of course! Wouldn't miss a game like that for my nan's funeral."
"How would you like to play?" JJ's face grew into a grin as the chat's speed tenfolded, your hand dropping the phone as you let out a gasp, followed by a shriek, followed by a scream and jumping onto your chair before toppling it and yourself over.
You could hear JJ's joyous laughter from the phone that'd dropped under the desk, before you dove under for it- drawing it closer to your face as you screamed WHAT THE FUCk?!!
One sleep and one train ride later, you found yourself hugging all your Internet-mates once again. You found Niko and Chunkz first, giving the two of them a hug and catching up with them- before you saw Kai and Duke come downstairs together.
You blushed a bit hugging the old-crush Duke, but eased up whilst talking to Kai, who was ecstatically vlogging all three of you, unbelievably excited for the game ahead of you.
A more familiar face popped up a few moments later before Danny Aarons himself descended down the stairs groggily, receiving a warm embrace before he'd even gotten to the bottom of the stairs. He hugged you back, swaying a bit before pulling away to look at you with a grin.
"Get off the kit, Y/n, this the winning team's kit."
"Yeah, you said that about Tottenham before the Fulham game and look how that turned out."
That had Danny silenced as you laughed at his expression, patting him on the back and bringing him down to sit at the hotel's restaurant table with you. You'd managed to arrive just in time for dinner, and whilst you felt slightly underdressed in your comfy joggers and top, you felt comfortable sitting down at one of the tables to the side- Danny occupying the chair opposite you and pulling his phone out just as Simon approached.
"Not stealing the love of Ginge's life are you?" Simon knocked on Danny's shoulder as he passed, snickering and watching as Danny shouted at Simon's turned back in his defence. You furrowed your brows at the mention, Simon's words flying right over your head as you had no clue who Simon was talking about, whoever the named person was. You hadn't even caught the name Simon was referring to.
Maybe Simon was commenting on what he saw on Danny's phone, as Danny had been flicking through Instagram just a moment earlier.
Dinner went just fine, luckily.
Will, Chris, JJ and a few others joined you at different points, having a chat about the match and all the different things... Obviously, you were slightly nervous, but Will reassured you that if worst came to worst, he'd score an own goal to cover any of your fuck-ups.
You saw a tall ginger come down the stairs at some point as well- flicking his head so that his fringe flipped away from his face.
You observed him as he stepped down, his own eyes scanning the room as he looked for where to go or sit during the dinner. You got the chance to look him up and down whilst he did so, noticing how built he appeared. You hoped he'd be on your team, as you could imagine he'd be a strong player regardless of what position he actually played on the pitch.
His eyes found yours momentarily and you realised you had zoned out staring at him.
You pulled back with a blush dusted over your cheeks, looking back towards your fillet and plate, not feeling quite as hungry as you did before. You wanted to go and talk to that guy, but as you looked up again he was nowhere to be seen- not by the food point, any of the tables or the court...
Supposing he left, you turned back to Danny and listened to his story, trying to ignore the thoughts of that ginger guy and wanting to get to know more about him.
And unsurprisingly, you did get to know more about him just a day later.
You'd never been one for morning runs, but the fear of the match day dawned on you and crept up as you watched the sun rise over the Thames. And aching, crawling, horrid bile beginning in your lower stomach and not ending, but continuing up to your throat.
It was futile trying to get any more sleep after that, and so at a ripe 6am, you had your trainers and leggings on, earbuds plugged in and Ice Spice playing to the beating to the same tempo as you breathed. The crisp air was cleansing, refreshing as you crossed the road and continued your jog past the corner shop and onto a busier road, before you found a neat place to loop around and get back to the hotel at.
Through the park, you slowed to a less taxing jog, admiring the greenery in stark contrast to the dull grey of the outer London. You turned the corner, ready to exit the park and make your way back to the hotel when-
"FUCK!" You collided with someone in front of you hard. Your headphones skittered to the floor and your body followed, though luckily you went onto the grass. Still, it hurt your bum a bit, and you squeezed your eyes tight upon the impact.
"Bloody hell, y'alright love?" You heard two knees click as someone bent down besides you- your eyes opening to reveal that ginger you'd seen just the night before.
"You?" You groaned, your hand finding your back and massaging the stinging sensation. You'd hoped you would have at least been able to get ready before seeing that ginger bloke again- having wanted to talk to him looking nice. Afterall, he wasn't half bad looking himself, you'd found yourself thinking.
"What d'you mean you?" He asked, slightly affronted, pulling back slightly to look you up and down a bit meanly. "Thought you would've been a bit nicer."
"You know me?" You raised a brow, not expecting someone like him to be the type to watch your content. His ears cheeks went a pink hue almost instantly and he gulped, making you laugh slightly, not quite knowing why he reacted so nervously yet amused nonetheless.
"Right, enough of that- you on the way back to the hotel?" He asked, offering out a hand which you took, allowing him to help you up and onto your feet.
It shocked you a bit by how much taller he was as he stood in front of you. You thought you'd at least be eye level with his head, yet he was far taller- your head level with his chest, meaning that you had to crane your neck upwards to look at him, despite being near 6".
Your eyes drifted as you heard someone give a disapproving cough as they walked by, flashing a matching disapproving look. Realising your body was basically flush with the ginger that'd helped you up, you blushed and took a step back, picking up your headphones from the side and inhaling sharply as you turned them over to inspect them.
"Broken?"
"Look pretty bad-"
The right side's earmuff fell off before you could finish. The two of you stared at the broken headphone, a noise of suppressed laughter coming from behind you. You turned around and tried to face the guy with a deadpan face- yet with one glimpse of your expression- he burst out with a scream of laughter almost, bending over to let it out which did make you drop your expression to laugh with him- his laughter too contagious.
"You owe me a pair of headphones for that..." Your sentence trailed off as you looked for a name to call him.
"Ginge is the name," He puffed out his chest. "Just call me Morgan, though."
"Right, well, I'm-"
"Y/n? Yep, I know."
The two of you made your way back to the hotel with that, a little bit of small talk between the two of you as you finished your run at the ripe time of half seven in the morning.
"You had breakfast yet?" Morgan asked as the two of you entered the hotel lobby.
"No, you?" You turned to him as he shook his head. "Well then-" You took his hand in yours to take him to the breakfast bar so that he could sit and have breakfast with you- not wanting to be left to eat alone. And although you didn't see, Morgan's face went bright red as he began deeping the fact he had just spoken to his literal online crush, and was now getting breakfast with her - not to mention his fingers which were interlaced with your own already. He could never have imagined that he'd ever be able to do this, just a few days ago when he had gotten the call from Simon inviting him to the match.
Picking your yoghurt, fruit and fancy bits and bobs, you looked around the room for any of the other boys- but it appeared that Morgan and yourself were the first down. Thus, the two of you found a nice two-seater by the windows on the side, and sat to eat with one another.
You realised that Morgan had very nice eyes. Very blue, quite piercing, but his smile always seemed to make them more warm, more inviting. And he had so many stories. I mean, you could've sat opposite him all morning and not spoken a word and still have been entertained.
The two of you kept opposite one another even once your breakfast was finished, just chatting with one another.
Simon was first to come down with Tobi at his side, the two still a bit tired- though their eyes widened, waking up right away as they entered the breakfast bar and saw yourself sat opposite Ginge, head tilted and resting against your hand, staring up at Ginge and listening as he spoke, letting out a giggle before replying as he listened with a pure smile.
"That isn't Morgan with Y/n, is it?" Simon whispered and Tobi let out a little squeal.
"Oh my god, do you think we've just made a couple?!" Tobi whispered excitedly back.
"I'm wondering how the hell Ginge has managed to get Y/n for breakfast..." Simon shook his head. "What the Hell, I thought he'd make a tit of himself in front of her and that would go viral on the pitch... I didn't think that Ginge's crush would become anything real..."
"Reckon we get a Twitter pic?" Tobi turned to Simon with a little grin.
As soon as Simon returned with a smirk, Tobi whipped out his phone, peeking it around the corner and zooming in to the far table and snapping a photo, giggling as he showed it to Simon before pasting it into Twitter and hitting the Tweet button.
"Mission accomplished."
The two high fived before going into the bar and grabbing themselves their breakfast, wishing a good morning to yourself and Ginge before descending into giggles as they ran out of the bar and back to their rooms, gossiping the whole way back like a pair of schoolkids.
You were a bit confused by the first interaction of the morning with Simon and Tobi, and that confusion only grew as more of your friends descended the stairs. Everyone seemed to have their eyebrows raised, a look of surprise on their faces as they saw you and Morgan that morning.
Only Duke and Kai were kind enough to enlighten you on why.
"AYYYY, W RIZZ ANGRYGINGE, W RIZZ GINGE!!" Kai jumped as he saw the two of you sat down, holding out a hand which Morgan tentatively reached out for, Kai slapping them together and shoulder bumping himself with Ginge as he brought Duke over also.
"Morning Ma'am," Duke nodded at you, side-hugging a Morgan that was reddening at a frightening pace, quite similarly to yourself as you just felt slightly flustered at the thought everyone had thought Morgan and you were having breakfast together in a cute couple-y way. "I saw y'all was together from what Tobi posted-"
"What TOBI posted?" Your eyes went wide, head spinning between Kai, Morgan and Duke at the mention of yourself being posted without your knowledge, just as you noticed Danny entering the breakfast bar as well.
Danny snatched an apple from the counter before spotting you, jerking his head backwards and indicating for you to come with him, as he spot your stressed expression. You gave a quick hug to Kai and Duke, telling Morgan you'd see him in a few and thanks for the breakfast (Kai and Duke squealed and congratulated a tentative Ginge) before you followed after Danny, meeting him in the elevator just before the door managed to close.
"You know who Ginge is?" He asked, looking between you and his phone where he was rapidly typing.
"...Not really, no, I first saw him yesterday to be honest." You shook your head. Danny slotted his phone into your hands and you watched the TikTok on the screen.
"Then you should REALLY watch these clips."
The first clip was titles GINGE'S FIRST TIME REACTING TO Y/N! and showed him scrolling through his TikTok when he saw a clip of you come up, doing a forfeit Rasputin dance and screaming about how your thighs were burning. He was initially wide eyed staring at you at the beginning- and you couldn't even begin to count the number of times you saw him look you up and down on his screen. That clip ended with him clicking on your profile to follow you and follow the link in your bio to your other socials.
The next clip was him @-ing you on twitter, asking whether you wanted to play GTA sometime. He was clearly giddy asking it as well, and he let out a scream as he pressed post and threw his headphones off to run out of shot, still squealing. You let out a chuckle, feeling a bit bad having never received any wind about that tweet and thus not having replied to it.
Then there was a clip of Ginge doing the "throw the pen and if it lands in the jar it's true" challenge, saying "If this goes in, Y/n knows about me and loves me but is too nervous to say something". The pen went in, and Morgan let out a scream again.
Danny took his phone off of you as he saw you smiling down at the phone- your trance broken as you looked up to Danny once he took your phone away.
"So..." You began. "He's cute I s'pose."
"WHAT?!" Danny's mouth dropped open. "I thought you would've found him weird after that?!"
"Well I don't know, he was decent during breakfast..."
"Yeah, about that-"
Danny thrusted the phone back into your hands, Tobi's instagram stories opened. The picture was captioned MORNIGN BREAKFAST DATE? 👀 and featured a (luckily) blurry picture of yourself and Ginge sat at the table with one another, your head resting in the palm of your hand as you looked at Morgan. Luckily it looked as though it were taken from far enough away that it could've been any redhead guy sat with a girl.
"I'm gonna boot that ball at Tobi as soon as I get it on the pitch."
Sidemen_Updates: Picture of mysterious ginger and girl having breakfast together in restaurant! What could this mean? 🤔
sdmnfan1: Ginger? Probs Behz n his missus YANITEDx3: Angry ginge???? HapyyGinge: What are the chances he's w y/n lol YANITEDx3: No way ugly bastards getting anywhere near her Y/ncentral: Tbh shes' playing at the match it rly could be HapyyGinge: Can you imagine if he's bagged her after all the talk 😭😭😭 Clarkeysbog: Nah why'd they acc be kinda cute asw... Y/ncentral: Alr guys imma stop u there i think we're getting a bit delulu here
"Alright, love?" Ginge caused you to snap your head up from Twitter with a little snort as he plopped himself down into the seat next to yourself in the bus.
"Didn't realise you were such a massive fan of my content, AngryGinge13."
You only let out another snort as you watched his face slowly flush from pale to bright red like a tomato, his face and hair the same colour as he began stuttering over some sort of explanation.
"What's this, 'wife Y/n up immediately?'" You read out the caption as you displayed the TikTok on your phone, cackling as Morgan groaned, covering his face with his hands and sliding down his seat- most likely praying for the world to swallow him up in that moment. It was quite cute, honestly, and you resisted the urge to reach over and give him a hug.
"It's okay, it's okay..." You settled for patting his head with a devious grin as you continued to tease him in a slightly lowered voice, loving the shyness you'd inflicted on the boy besides you. "You're not half bad yourself, either, but I guess we'll see where that goes after the match..."
Two squeals drew your attention away from your flirting with Morgan, however, as Tobi and Simon giggled from in front of you- Tobi's phone raised above his head to reflect the view of you teasing Morgan- the duo in the seats in front of you far too invested in seeing a love story develop - watching yourself and Morgan through the camera app as though you were a Netflix romance show.
Morgan could only be happy that you'd looked away from him however, because the feeling of your legging-ed thigh brushing against his own skin had a blush creeping across his cheeks - the teasing compliment you'd served causing his ears to turn a lovely beet red, too.
You decided to lay off him, however, instead returning to your phone and chatting with JJ and Chunkz who weren't sat too far away - letting yourself rest your legs across Morgan's lap partway through, and making a little TikTok with him during the journey, too... And the fans were keen to point out your legs stretched across Morgan's, as well as the boy's coy little smile n wave at the camera - cheeks dusted red with a shy blush, contrasting his normal, boisterous persona.
In the end, you did end up just falling asleep...
On Morgan's shoulder.
And Tobi was the one to let you know, as you arrived at the stadium, stretching you limbs out and cracking your neck before checking your instagram stories whilst rows slowly filed out of the bus. And lo and behold, Tobi's story yielded a picture of him holding the camera up with a hand over his mouth, portraying giggly-shock at the image of you curled up on Morgan's shoulder whilst Morgan held up a meek thumbs up, bemused smile and wide eyes displaying a look of bewilderment for how he'd found himself in such a position.
"Prick", You hissed at Tobi as you walked past him to the changing rooms, hearing the explosion of his and Simon's laughter as well as JJ's confused what? 's whilst you just sped up to Danny, flipping off Kon's BTS camera with a grin along the way, too.
Though you were a part of the Sidemen team, playing on Sidemen FC as goalkeeper, the organiser had been kind enough to organise the locker-room arrangement so that whilst you had your own (barren) changing room separate from the boy's one - a short corridor connected the two so that you could still walk back once they were done changing, and join the team talks.
And after switching your comfy leggings and tee for your kit, you joined with the boys as you walked out onto the pitch.
You could feel nerves building in your stomach as you walked through the tunnel, fingers drumming anxiously along the wall as a nervous stim. And it seemed as though someone else had noticed too, as you felt a soft bump against your right shoulder, drawing a slight gasp from your throat as you were pulled out of your thoughts to look up at the man who walked besides you.
"Nervous?" His Mancunian accent sounded almost mocking, but the eye contact with a seemingly caring expression told you otherwise, and let you give an honest answer.
"I've been alright all morning... Well, after the morning run, but I can feel myself getting nervous now -"
You were cut off by gargantuan roar from the crowds outside, the cheers creating an echo within the opening tunnel and almost wanting to make you press your hands over your ears and run away from the overpowering noise. You could borderline feel tears prickling at the corners of your eyes and a heat rushing to your neck which made you regret initially answering the phone and sealing your fate in playing in this match.
Morgan noticed your nerves, too, heart sinking as he saw your expression dropping at the crowd reaction to JJ running onto the pitch.
"Look, listen-" Morgan put a hand on your shoulder, pulling you to the side of the tunnel so that the likes of JME and XQC were free to pass by whilst Morgan's eyes bore into yours. "-It's too late to back out at this point and you know that, yeah?"
You gulped and nodded in agreement, not feeling any better from Morgan's enforcement.
"And how long you been playing football for - as a keeper."
"Since I was about six," You divulged, not knowing where exact Morgan was going, and feeling your voice come out almost thinly, strained from the fear which tightened your vocal cords.
"And how many people you got following you - all across the board - on your TikTok, Instagram, Twitch - fuck, you can even could your secret Wattpad account from when you were twelve, I don't care-"
"A few million," You cut him off with a slight laugh at his words, sniffing and trying to clear the nerves and make room for Morgan's positivity to fill your body, too. "And that's not including the Wattpad followers."
"Well there's eighty thousand here - you have millions of followers? Technically that means about eight-hundred-percent of the people here love you -" Morgan's waffle earned a bemused look at the flawed maths, yet you continued listening regardless. "-So that means that absolutely everyone you can hear outside there - yeah - they all fucken love you, so you don't have shit to be scared about, yeah? And you've been keeping for over a decade - you've got skill, you've got talent, you know what you're doing, don't let yourself get scared because we're a duo you and me - I'm gonna be defending as right-back, you're with me and I know both of us are talented so we don't have shit to get scared about, alright?"
It was odd, hearing the crowd fade out as you focussed on the ginger's waffle, noticing how his eyes seemed to glow whilst his face was barely a few inches away from yours during his passionate ramble. And once he was done, though you didn't feel wholly freed from your nerves, you could wholly appreciate the extent Morgan was going to in an attempt to placate your nerves.
Morgan was stunned as he felt arms wrap around him, eyes widening slightly as the breath left his lungs, making eye contact with Josh who gave him a smirk with questioning eyes - bringing rise to a blush on Morgan's cheeks as he embraced you with his own arms, slowly patting on your back in what was attempted comfort.
His hand slid down from your shoulders to your hand, fingers interlacing with yours and pulling you out of your sad feels as you noticed the warmth of his palm against yours, the way his long fingers seemed to envelop your hand and squeeze your appendage bringing an almost giggly twistiness to your stomach as you could feel a heat spreading across your face at the gesture.
Now was most definitely not the time to be getting crush feelings, and yet you couldn't help yourself from letting those butterflies in your stomach spread to every extreme molecule of your body.
"C'mon, let's go get warmed up outside - we're not playing yet so at least you can get a feel for what it's like out there."
Morgan's hand didn't leave yours. No, his fingers stayed intertwined with yours whilst you two walked towards the light, walking out of the enclosed space onto the lush green of the pitch, feeling the first ray of glorious butter gold sunlight hit your face - the hot air of the pitch flooding you as you left the AC-cooled tunnel - jogging out with Ginge as you heard the uproar of the pitch upon your entrance. The positively uproarious response from the crowd made a smile spread to your face, nerves dissipating slightly as you grinned - rotating your head to take in the stands filled with fans - a grand screen to one side of the stadium projecting yourself and Ginge.
Responding to the crowd's noise, Ginge raised your interlinked hands above your head, the screen projecting your interwoven fingers and only making the crowd even louder - a few screams resonating from the stadium and making you double over with laughter as you reached the Sidemen FC team who were grouped together, kicking a ball between themselves.
"PUTTING ON A SHOW WITH GINGE, EH?" Danny yelled from the other side of the circle, making you detach your hand from Morgan's - though the grin on your face was unwipeable.
"Look at you two LOVEBIRDS -" JJ loudly chipped in with an overdone wink, nudging your arm from the left.
"Everything's coming together for you now, i'nt it Ginge?" Simon tittered, as Tobi collapsed into his side at the mention - the duo both enjoying the way that Ginge stuttered to come up with a response (a matching grin also plastered on his face).
And although you would've loved to have watched Ginge scramble to pull his words together, Josh tapped you on the shoulder, removing you from the group by sending you over to Elz to get interviewed.
Midway through the interview, Ginge was kind enough to boot a ball into the back of your legs, catching your attention just long enough for him to blow a kiss which made you roll your eyes at the gesture, smiling nonetheless.
"That's Ginge blowing a kiss for you there - speaking of Ginge - what sort of relationship do you have with him? Because I'm sure you've seen clips circulating online which show how Ginge has sort of got a little online crush on you..."
"Well, I'll be honest - those clips were only shown to me this morning, thanks to Danny," You spoke, realising how much had happened just today. "And... Well, I think it's difficult to name- or say what mine and Ginge's relationship really is - I mean - we just had our first conversation this morning!"
"OH- does that mean that picture Tobi posted on his Instagram story this morning is in fact you and Ginge - because there's been some speculation on Twitter and whatnot..."
You threw your head back to laugh a bit at the question. "Yeah, I've seen all the comments too... I think the fans are really invested in seeing Ginge and I interact to be honest-"
"Yeah, I'm sure that running into the pitch with the hands held will give the fans some fuel to talk about for a while."
"No doubt about it."
"Could you just expand on what you and Ginge were saying in the tunnel before you came out, holding hands? We had a little clip of the tunnel beforehand, where we saw you with your back to the wall talking to Ginge, and I'll be honest - it seemed very intimate between you two - can we know anything that was going on there?"
That unremovable smile returned to your face - the one that made you feel as though you were trying not to giggle and return to being just a girl with a crush... Not that you exactly had a crush... "I was a little bit nervous back there I'll be honest, and bless him, Morgan- sorry- Ginge was so sweet; he noticed and was just sorta giving me some support and affirming it was all gonna be alright - and yeah, that's why we came out holding hands too, that was Ginge's little gesture to try and boost my confidence up."
"Well, I'm sure whatever he said was true, because we're all expecting an absolute storm from you today on the pitch, Y/n - we'll let you get back to warming up and training, and we wish you luck out there on the pitch!"
You returned to the Sidemen FC circle where the boys did their dynamic stretching - joining in with the line of men that stretched their hamstrings by shooing the chickens on the line.
"How you feeling now?" Ginge moved to stand next to you whilst he stretched.
"A lot better." You breathed a sigh of relief. "Everything feels a lot more... relaxed, now. You know, it's scary everyone's up there watching but it's kinda easy to separate that. It just feels like playing football with a bunch of people I'm a fan of."
"Exactly how I'm feeling." Ginge agreed. "Let's warm you up in goal."
Fifteen minutes later - after having saved some of Ginge's goals - having a team talk - and feeling primed and ready for the match... Simon won the coin toss, the whistle blew, and the game commenced With Simon passing the ball back to Tobi, and your heartrate accelerating through the roof.
Though Ginge was completely true to everything he'd promised, you noticed as the tall ginger dominated the back line, kicking the ball away whenever Chris or Niko or Filly or Theo came close... Making your work as a goalkeeper light as you allowed Kai - your short friend who was criminally offside - to kick the ball into the back of the net.
As the corner was being taken, although Ginge was attentively marking Speed, he didn't miss the opportunity to yell a quick bit of praise at you between his rugged pants, making Simon yell at him to "SHUT UP AND GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME!", despite the Sidemen's current 1-0 score, lieu to Ethan.
And even when you did let Chris conceded a goal - after he weaved and dribbled the ball between the line of defenders?
Your body hit the ground - an attempted and failed dive whereby Chris' ball had passed just beneath your gloved before you could get it. And letting yourself lie there and rest your head in your arms on the floor, hearing cheers from the audience at the blond superstar's shocking goal - you felt not so ashamed, as one person came to you and sighed - sitting next to you and patting your back whilst you just groaned.
"You're alright, that was pretty un-saveable." He comforted, and you just moved your head to the right to make eye contact with him from the grassy pitch - plopping your head back into yours arms.
"That was fucking embarrassing, that slow-mo is gonna be a violation..." You looked up at the large screen at the end of the stadium that replayed the goal, and your dive as the ball just managed to sneak past your arms. A groan fell from your lips again, because of how goofy you felt you looked.
"Oh come on that's not half bad," Ginge argued, and slung an arm around your back as you decided to get up - accompanying your movements and getting you back up and onto your feet. "C'mon, you've still got this - they've had double the shots on goal that we've had and you've saved all of them other than that one so far. You're already doing miles better than eighty percent of the pitch."
"STOP DISTRACTING Y/N AND GET IN POSITION, GINGE!" Simon's shout came again, though even the blond who was so passionate about the game couldn't help but yell with a grin, at the way that Ginge looked so domestically sweet towards you - a side of the ginger which no-one had seen before.
And luckily, with Simon slotting a goal in and Chunkz getting one in return - you made it to the half time team talk with an equal 2-2 score to either team.
"-So attack is our strongest of the lot, and then in defence I'm spotting really good chemistry-"
Everyone in the circle turned their heads subconsciously towards you and Ginge as manager Wingrove pointed out the chemistry. And you could feel a blush rising to your cheeks as your eyes zipped and noticed how many people within the team had noticed you and Ginge's close connection... And Ginge's arm around your shoulder, which had been stuck their since Clattenburg had blown the half time whistle didn'y help your case much, either.
"But we've got to lock into the game back there. We're taking too long setting up because there's a bit too much chit-chat going on around there."
Simon coughed to subtly conceal the yell of GINGE! that left his lips, that made everyone laugh. Tobi nodded approvingly though, flashing a wink as you made eye contact with him and felt an even deeper shade of red settling across your cheeks.
At least you and Ginge had matching blushes.
"Morgan I know you say I'm your crush on your streams and all-" You leant over to whisper into the Ginger's ear whilst Wingrove spoke to the attackers, the ginger leaning his head down so that he could hear your quiet voice over the noise of the rest of the changing room - creating intimate proxemics. "-But d'you actually mean any of that? Like, are you just exaggerating and keeping all that up for the viewers...?"
Ginge withdrew with wide eyes at the accusation, your words seemingly the stupidest thing he'd ever heard.
Although before you got the answer that could placate your nerves and send you out with a dopamine high for the next round...
Cheers errupted from all the boys as Ethan gave his team talk, making the both of your heads snap up like deer in headlights, as you saw the interviewer, Cecil Jee, camera trailing behind him - having caught the team speech as well as the entirety of yours and Ginge's intimate interaction.
Again, you wondered whether it was all being played up for the cameras in that moment, where Ginge tried to comfort you by attaching his hand to yours and giving it a squeeze - all noise turning into a blurry, unintelligible mush of words as Ginge's hand pulled you onto your feet and into the tunnel once more for the second round of the game.
And before you knew it, you were back in the white box of the goal area, clapping your gloved hands together and yelling out towards the pitch.
Ofc course not before Ginge managed to give you your own personal pep talk in the goal square, hyping you up and making you fist bump him with all your body power before hugging him whilst you heard another cheer bubble from the crowd, which was undoubtably for you two and the romance that they saw blossoming on the pitch, between their favourite creator and the man that they thought would never have a chance.
But no more than ten minutes after after Ginge's cute little speech, did you watch him brutally floor a little blond man in the penalty area - and referee Clattenburg's whistle sounding, deducing a....
Penalty.
"I'm gonna fucken kill you if I concede because of your stupid, illegal tackles," You hissed at the ginger as he came up to you practically splurging his apologies whilst you watched JJ take on Chunkz and and Kai in a wrestling match besides Chris at the penalty spot. "Holy shit, they've got Speed taking this pen?!"
You were horrified to watch the boy place ball down and eye you up like prey.
"Morgan, I'm gonna die-" The hyperbole fell from your lips too easily as you felt pressure begin to consume you.
"Y/n if you concede I promise I'll shatter his shins-" Ginge caught your horrified look. "Outside of the penalty area so you don't have to deal with another pen, of course-"
"Shut up and go to the edge so that you can run in and boot the ball away when I deflect it, you right twa-"
Tobi pulled Ginge away, overhearing the conversation - and Danny - a part of the opposition only took Ginge's place.
"You and Ginge been getting chatty." He raised a brow and you rolled your eyes.
"You're not allowed to distract me before a pen." You gave a blunt response, and the stubborn boy crossed his arms and only took a step closer so that he was even more in your personal space as he began interrogation.
"Have you two just agreed to play it up for the media, or is Y/n genuinely getting up in her feels?" Danny teasingly persisted, yet only asked the question that'd been on your mind for the entirety of the second half. And it most definitely wasn't what you needed reminding of as you back-stepped into the goal, star jumping and telling the persistent boy to fuck off, as you tried to get in the zone yet couldn't shake off the annoyingly smirking brunet.
Taller, more built and ginger-er - your partner in defence plucked Danny from besides you like a teddy bear, picking Danny up and removing him from the goal square (much to your relief), and letting you lock in - star jumping and clapping your hands together to lock yourself in and follow the ball as Speed took his steps backwards run up to the ball, bounding towards it and striking it towards the side, sending it rolling towards...
....The centre?!
Your hands collected the ball at your knees with minimal effort as you looked up with confusion - almost expecting Clattenburg to say that Speed had to redo it.
Although instead you were met with the Sidemen boys running over to you, cheering for scoring the absolutely abysmal shot that'd been saved whilst Ginge practically crushed you with a hug, screaming "LET'S FUCKEN GO - I NEVER DOUBTED YOU FOR A MINUTE-" Whilst you felt overwhelming dopamine filling your system as you let out a victorious yell of your own - telling the boys to scatter before thundercunting the ball further up the court and watching at the ball you kicked lead to an assist as Manny flicked it into the goal XQC marked.
You were running on a complete high as you watched Manny score another - then Tobi - followed by Harry... And even though Max Fosh and Niko managed to get their balls fly past your fingertips and into your goal's net - watching Tareq just tap the ball into the bottom left as the whistle blew...
A scream left your mouth at the victory, as the rest of the pitch and crowd broke into their own celebrations - though the ginger man who had carried the defence alongside you?
He instantly whirled around once the whistle sounded, Ginge making eye contact with you whilst his face broke out into an uncontrollable grin, pointing you out and sprinting over with the fastest speeds you'd seen all day as you joined in with running towards him, shortening the distance bit by bit before you jumped onto the man who was no less than a metre away.
Your legs wrapped around his middle, his arms wrapping around your body as yours tightly enveloped his shoulders, burying your cheek into the ginger head of hair that'd been made spiky from sweat and exertion of the game - though just as much as Ginge didn't care about your sweaty body that pressed into his, you couldn't have cared less as you two tightly embraced, every muscle in your body jittering in excitement of the win which you celebrated with you accomplice on the pitch.
And then you had everyone else swam you - another pair of arms around your back, and then your side, as a huddle of Sidemen FC formed with yourself on Ginge's hips - elevated at the centre, were projected onto the grand screen at one end of the stadium, Harry and Tobi and Simon and Ethan and JJ and Josh and Vik, Wingrove and MrBeast and Deji and Lux and Freezy-
Ethan lift the trophy with a cheers whilst sparks of orange and yellow escalated from the pyrotechnics on either side of the stage, the whole crowd cheering as you all jumped and took it in turns lifting the trophy and getting a cheer of your own.
And after Ginge had lifted it - you felt pats on your back, pushing to to the front of the stage to hold the cup up with the ginger, hearing the loudest cheer yet as you and the previous-fanboy-now-friend lifted the cup up alongside you - electricity crackling between the two of you as you placed it down carefully, before finding himself thrown back around you and hugging you happily as the dopamine flooded through your systems.
"GINGE, Y/N - CAN WE GET A POST MATCH INTERVIEW FROM YOU TWO?"
Elz pulled the pair of you towards the mic as Ginge's arm detached from around your shoulders to pick up a mic and hold it between the two of you.
"Congratulations on the win, you both played spectacularly and I have no doubts you're both feeling absolutely ecstatic right now, is that right?"
Ginge nodded and you went to answer the question. "You've hit the nail right on the head, Elz - honestly - we were both sort of asked to join the game on a whim - and to have so many good moments on the pitch together... Yeah, completely over the moon really."
"And we have seen those moments on the pitch - and in the changing room, when you two have been really very close, and you two most definitely have the most chemistry on this pitch!" Elz voiced the fans' thoughts with a wide grin, getting the inside scoop of the chemistry and absolutely loving it. "But will your chemistry remain off of the pitch? We've seen from your clips, Ginge - you've had yourself a little thing for Y/n, but we've never seen it reciprocated until today... Will we be seeing more of you two as a duo?? Maybe even as the next YouTube couple on the scene...?"
You were completely stunned by the question - looking from a curious Elz up towards the ginger with a crush - watching as he smiled bashfully, hand raising to sweep his fringe from his eyes in a way that looked shy now, as he looked and smiled down at you - taking the mic from your hands to ask...
"Well, I think that's up to Y/n, if she'd maybe want to come out for a d-date with us sometime-"
Ginge was cut off as a scream left Elz's mouth at the young romance she watched unfurling in front of the cameras, as you yourself couldn't voice your own interest enough - nodding your head rapidly whilst Ginge's grin spread to your own lips.
And in a moment of greatness, where the two of you had both won the cup and were at peak stages of happiness - your delight was only raised even further by Ginge asking you out - and you felt his arms come beneath your legs, picking you up and ending the interview whilst holding you bridal style before marching back to the changing rooms still carrying you, your arms slung around his neck whilst you couldn't help the giggles n redness on your face that had you feeling like a mere teenager.
And walking through and into your separate, secluded changing room - he dropped you down so that you could sit on one of the benched whilst he sat besides you, also still sporting a wide grin of his own.
"Morgan?" You felt your voice take a more tentative, cautious tone as there was a slight shake in your words. "You didn't answer at half time and I still don't really know and just wanna make sure we're on the same page, really... Are you... Are we... Are you - i dunno - serious about wanting to go out on a date, and all of this? Or is it all just for the viewers and content..."
Again, Ginge looked at you like you were mental.
"Y/n, you flipping div," The insult fell all too easily from his lips, and made you furrow your brows together. "I've thought you were the most hot and out-out-my-league lass since I found you on TikTok - then Twitch and then YouTube too - the fact that today you've shown any signs of liking me back, I should be scared of you just doing this for content, not the other way round."
"What I'm trying to say is it's not for content, I do really like you and I would really l-like to go on a date with you... As long as you're still on with that.."
A sigh of relief followed by a squeal of happiness left your lips before you reattached yourself to Ginge's body to hug him, feeling your heartrate decelerate as it was confirmed; Ginge did indeed like you and it wasn't all for the cameras.
Feeling a surging throughout your entire body, you reached up and planted a kiss on his right cheek - the side that you were cuddled up to, squeezing him one last time before commanding him to get out so that you could change - collapsing against the metal bench and giving yourself a breather to take it all in, the moment that Ginge left.
That was, until, you heard the conversation fall silent in the Sidemen boys' connected changing room, before someone asked "Well Ginge, what happened?"
Again, there was another silence - and you pricked your ears to listen in and see how Ginge would respond to the question.
"SHE KISSED ME!" Was what you heard him yell, before the rest was covered with the deafening roar of cheers from the other boys, making a laugh bubble from your throat at the fact that not only had you played and successfully won the trophy for your team - but you'd also succesfully secured yourself a date with someone who made you blush, laugh and feel loved.
BONUS SCENE!!!
New post on Insta from @/angryginge13!
AngryGinge13: Best day of my life. Thank you Sidemen and Y/n.username
open replies
Y/n.username: 😋💗 DannyAarons: stop thirsting in the replies Kaicenat: W RIZZ Y/Ncentral: AHHHH I CANT BELIEVE SMTH HAS HAPPENED BETWEEN THESE TWO HapyyGinge: LITR MENTAL INNIT Yanitedx3: Still dont know how he's bagged her 😭😭😭
Miniminter: @/tobjizzle LOOK AT WHAT WE'VE DONE YAY Tobjizzle: If we aren't front row at their wedding there's gonna b issues Ksi: wait guys i technically am part of this too, i invited her to the match Miniminter: Shut up you aren't a part of this.
New post on Insta from Y/n.username!
Y/n.username: Yeah you're never gonna hear me shut up about this.
open replies!
Angryginge13: Better than Onana 💗 Yanitedx3: this man is so locked in if he's saying shit like that
Tobjizzle: LOOK @/miniminter SHE'S POSTED HIM TOO JKDJFSH Miniminter: THIS IS OUR BEST ASSISST YET Y/n.username: shut up you guys 😭😭 Angryginge13: I cannot thank you boys enough.
Chunkz: Yeah none of the posts from our elevator photoshoot i see how it is Y/n.username: saving those for when Vogue finally calls me back
XQC: the better goalkeeper 👏 Y/n.username: Respect to you, great game 💓🫡 Angryginge13: Not as much game as me though clearly 🔥 Y/n.username: Shut up we're having a moment
I started this last year after the charity match i shit u not it's taken a whole YEAR to write LMAOO 😭😭 Hope it's been worth it x
Hope you enjoyed reading!! Feel free to interact- whether that be a comment, vote or follow! Requests open, feel free to submit what u wanna see… Much love!!
To see more, here’s my MASTERLIST
And here’s my WATTPAD, with 50+ more oneshots to read
p.s. Customise which Oneshots YOU want to be tagged in by submitting your preferences on THIS GOOGLE FORM + join the taglist!!!
GINGEEE TAGLIST:
@clarkeysbog, @springholland, @xxkatxgracexx, @mekselinaurr, @blackbat2020
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#angryginge13#angry ginge#angryginge#morgan burtwistle#x reader#angryginge13 x reader#fluff#fic#imagine#oneshot#miniminter#tobjizzle#simon minter#tobi brown#ksi#jj olatunji#harry lewis#w2s#wroeotoshaw#sidemen#sidemen charity match#football#youtube#mrbeast#karl jacobs#ishowspeed#chunkz#niko omilana#amp#beta squad
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I wish you would write a fic where...
…Hob is a little insecure about his body in comparison to Dream. Dream is wondering why his love only wants to have sex in the dark…
I need some hurt/comfort 🥹
Oh man friend, I started writing this thinking it wouldn't be super long and then 9.7k words later...😅
Still gonna post the whole thing on tumblr since this IS a tumblr prompt, but it's probably best read on AO3 for length reasons lmao. I hope you enjoy this angst train!
AO3 Link: Cruel Summer
Rating: Mature
Warnings: None
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - America, Developing Relationship, Casual Sex, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Self-Esteem Issues, Self Confidence Issues, body image issues
Also tagging @dreamlingbingo as I'm using this fill for my free space!
-----------------
The first time it happens, Dream doesn't think too much about it. There's not a lot of thinking going on period, not really. Dream's only focused on the touch and taste and feel of Hob Gadling’s body against his as they drunkenly make out against the latter’s front door.
They’d been out tonight celebrating with their friends, all of them having finally achieved some hard earned life goal. Matthew and Jessamy were engaged, and planning a marriage out on Cape Cod the following summer, Lucienne had gotten promoted as an archivist at Harvard, Mervyn had finally launched his own cybersecurity firm, and Dream had just signed a publishing deal for the novel he’d been working on for the past two years. His editing team was even based out of Boston, even if their main headquarters was in New York, which made Dream’s life much easier.
Hob…well. Hob’s celebration was more muted than the rest. He’d just landed a job at Harvard as well, working as a professor, so he and Lucienne were now technically coworkers. And while it was a fantastic opportunity with decent pay, and mostly free summers, it had come at the cost of his relationship with Eleanor, his longtime girlfriend.
Eleanor had accepted a job across the country working as a marketing lead for a lifestyle clothing brand based out of Seattle. She’d wanted the position more than anything, but Hob hadn’t wanted to move, so they broke up. Hob insists it was all amicable, and that he’d miss everyone too much if he’d actually left, but they all knew Hob had been thinking about proposing.
Dream knows all this, and yet, when it had just been the two of the left at the bar and Hob had started openly flirting with him alone, instead of just playfully flirting with every single one of their friends, Dream had decided, “why not”, and matched the other man’s energy until they were suddenly making out just outside the bar while they waited for the Uber Hob called for them. It’s still the beginning of summer and not terribly hot outside, but Dream’s still grateful for the cool AC of the car that eventually comes to get them to drive the short distance back to Hob’s apartment.
When Hob finally unlocks the door and they practically fall into the front hall, Dream messily kicks off his shoes and works his way towards undoing Hob’s belt in between kisses. Hob wrangles them down the hall and towards his bedroom and Dream thinks vaguely about turning on the lights when they finally cross the threshold. But then Hob pushes him down into the mattress and Dream stops thinking about anything at all.
-----------------
The second time that it happens, a little over a month later, Dream is helping Hob clean up his apartment after their monthly movie night with their friends. They had all decided on rewatching Jurassic Park after Mervyn and Lucienne had gotten into a debate on whether or not dinosaurs looked stupid with or without feathers. But it had taken the group some time for them to even start the movie, since they had mostly gotten wrapped up with different bits of work and life gossip. It was rare that they were all able to get together like this, so the movie was a secondary concern for them.
During the movie, however, Matthew and Jessamy’s wedding planner called them about something that needed their attention immediately, and though they said it was fine to keep the movie running, they’d paused it anyways. Not even ten minutes after they wrapped up their call, Mervyn had to take a work call from a client suffering from some server issues.
Needless to say, it was nearly midnight by the time they finished the movie, and since only Dream and Hob had nothing to do the next morning, Dream had offered to stay late to help clean up and then crash on Hob’s couch for the night.
That is, at least, the story they tell their friends. The dishes and the food end up abandoned as Hob pushes Dream into the couch cushions and palms his cock through his black jeans. Dream moans and ruts beneath the other man, wrapping his arms around his neck and pulling Hob in for a desperate, filthy kiss. They make out like teenagers for what seems like hours, the taste of buttery popcorn and overly sweet margarita mix mingled in every kiss. Dream isn’t nearly as drunk as he was that first night, but he’s got a pleasant buzz going, which really only adds to the whole illicit nature of what they’re doing. Neither of them had mentioned the first time they’d fucked to any of their friends, they’d barely talked about just between the two of them, really.
Dream had figured maybe they could talk about it tonight after everyone had gone home but well. He’d gotten distracted with Hob’s mouth.
When they finally move from the couch to the bedroom, Dream turns the lights on, but then Hob turns them right back off as Dream’s getting undressed.
“Are you one of those people who prefers to have sex in the dark?” Dream asks, laughing as Hob crawls on top of him, shedding his shirt and underwear along the way.
“Mmmm,” Hob says, putting his mouth on Dream’s neck instead of answering the question. Dream gasps as the other man bites down on that one sensitive spot just below his ear. “Don’t wanna get up later to turn them off.”
Dream hums, and that’s the end of that conversation as his mind floats away to far more interesting pursuits.
-----------------
The third time almost feels like a date. Almost. They don’t exactly plan to get together, just the two of them, it just sort of happens because Matthew had gotten sick, and Jessamy hadn’t wanted to leave him alone to fend for himself. She also wasn’t entirely sure if she was contagious herself and wanted to be safe. Mervyn was on call for a client this weekend so he wasn’t going out with them anyways, and Lucienne had decided she’d rather stay at home and catch up on some of her backlogged work rather than attend the Oktoberfest event they’d all bought tickets to.
Hob had texted Dream individually and suggested they go out anyway, just the two of them, and Dream’s heart had stuttered in his chest when he’d read the message. Hob had suggested a new restaurant that had opened up near his apartment, and while it wasn’t necessarily a first date sort of place, it was still a bit nicer than any of the places they’d go with their friends for just drinks or a quick bite to eat.
Dream agonizes for over an hour on what he should wear, before he ultimately defaults to what feels most natural to him, black jeans and a solid black polo instead of his usual band t-shirt, which he then pairs with a charcoal gray blazer, just to look a little nicer. But not too nice, just in case this isn’t a date.
Hob, much to Dream’s disappointment, is in his regular outfit of a graphic tee and sweats when Dream arrives. He’s not terribly out of place in the restaurant, but he’s clearly not dressed to impress. He eyes Dream very appreciatively though, and doesn’t comment on why Dream’s a little more dressed up than usual. What he does do, however, is spend the evening whispering into Dream’s ear about how he’d like to peel that blazer off Dream and make him wear it while they fuck.
They only make it through a single round of drinks before they leave, with Hob leaving their server behind a more than generous tip for wrapping up their bill so quickly.
Hob wastes no time divesting Dream of his blazer and tossing it down the hallway towards the bedroom before turning his attention back to kissing Dream senseless. He sinks to his knees and Dream moans as the other man then works at peeling his jeans off so he can blow Dream right in the front hall, up against the front door where anyone can walk by and hear. It makes everything that much hotter.
Later, when all Dream is left wearing is his blazer and nothing else, Hob gets up from where they’re kissing on the bed to turn off the lights and Dream frowns.
“You can just leave the lights on,” Dream says, before he coyly spreads his legs and shows off his best seductive pose to tempt Hob back to bed. Hob stares, transfixed at Dream’s posturing, before he huffs and then clicks off the lights anyways. Dream groans in annoyance and Hob laughs before he kisses Dream again.
“Sorry, just easier with the lights off,” Hob says, not sounding sorry at all. “Don’t worry about it too much.”
But Dream does worry. He doesn’t in the moment, but he does later, when they’re lying beside each other, Hob snoring away while Dream thinks and thinks and thinks. He thinks about how Hob always wants the lights off, and how he never cuddles with Dream after sex. He thinks about how they really only ever get together when it's convenient, but they've never made plans on their own, at least, not since Hob and Eleanor have broken up.
Dream realizes, with a growing dread, that maybe Hob still isn't over Eleanor, that maybe all there is between them is sex, and nothing else. It makes an awful sort of sense; in the dark, Dream can't tell if Hob’s thinking about someone else, hoping for someone that's not Dream. Eleanor and Dream couldn't be anymore different but that hardly matters to a man with a broken heart. A warm body is a warm body after all, and Dream's the only other single person in their friend group.
If Hob's a little bit confused as to why Dream is a bit short with him in the morning he doesn't show it. Somehow that makes the pit in Dream's stomach worse.
-----------------
The fourth time—there isn’t a fourth time because Dream fucks it all up.
Dream had met with his publisher earlier in the day, and the meeting had gone rather…poorly. His editor had straight up told him that he’d needed to make significant changes to the book, and Dream had argued until he was hoarse but to no avail. He’d then been told to go home and sleep on things, effectively being dismissed like a petulant child who’d thrown a tantrum in public.
Dream knew he had a good story. He also knew that some of the suggested changes were good ones, while others would fundamentally change the story he was trying to tell. But still, the sheer amount of changes had overwhelmed him, and Dream had lost his temper. He already knows, with a growing dread, that he’ll have to make some apologies the next day.
He’s about to go home, but Dream decides instead he’d like to get as drunk as humanly possible to wash the bitter taste of the day from his mind. He texts the group chat, and since it’s a Friday night, they all respond with enthusiasm to blow off some steam for the weekend. Everyone except for Hob, who says he’s not feeling like socializing tonight, but he’s sorry Dream had such a shitty day.
Dream tries not to be disappointed that Hob won’t show up. He wonders if he’d just invited Hob by himself, instead of texting their group, would he have come out, just for Dream? But they don’t do things like that, even with how long they’ve been friends. Before they started sleeping together, Hob and Dream had always just sort of existed together in the same circle of friends. Dream had actually met Eleanor first, and Hob only when they started dating. Dream has never spent any amount of alone time with Hob before now, and he still doesn’t know what sort of relationship they even have, if any at all.
Dream’s worries leave his mind when the others show up. Mervyn stays for only one round of drinks, and Matthew and Jessamy only two before they head out for the evening. They have an early appointment with the planner the next day to do some cake tastings. Lucienne stays the longest, though she really only nurses the same glass of wine the entire night. She talks Dream through his frustrations with his editors, and his overall story. She’s been with him every step of the way to getting this publishing deal, and Dream hasn’t told her yet, but she’s going to be the front page of his acknowledgements.
He’s so tempted to unload on her about Hob as well, but before he can gather the courage to broach the subject, she gets a text from someone and blushes furiously when she reads it. Dream pokes and prods until she admits she’s started seeing someone. Johanna. She’s not sure if it’s serious yet but well. They’re definitely physically compatible, and while she won’t show Dream her phone, he already knows she’s been sent something particularly provocative. So Dream lets her go, and then debates between ordering another drink or going home.
He does neither of those things, and instead pulls out his phone and texts Hob, outside their group chat. The alcohol has more than loosened Dream’s inhibitions and right now, he’s lonely and horny. Lucienne’s reserved but still elated expression as she had happily explained Johanna had made Dream miss Hob. So he texts the other man and tells him he’d like to come over.
Hob’s response isn’t what he’s hoping for: are you drunk?
Dream frowns at his phone and then his initial message: aree tou busy?? Can i comeocer?
Okay, maybe he was a little more drunk than he realized. He asks Hob if it matters, being careful this time to make sure he types everything out carefully, and then closes out his tab while he waits for a response. Nothing comes. Dream’s annoyed and disappointed, but not surprised, so he starts to make his way to the train platform to head home.
While he’s waiting, he finally gets a response back from Hob: okay. come over.
Dream changes platforms immediately and heads in the direction of Hob’s apartment.
When he arrives, Hob pushes a glass of water towards him, which Dream drinks down greedily. When he’s done, he joins Hob on the couch and crawls into his lap to kiss him, but Hob pushes him away after only a few moments. Dream lets out an annoyed noise when Hob does it again.
“Dream, not tonight,” Hob says, pushing him away when Dream tries to kiss him again.
“What do you mean?” Dream asks, now confused.
“I don’t want to have sex right now,” Hob replies, before he pushes Dream off of him and back onto the couch, going back to watching whatever crime drama he’d had on before Dream arrived.
Dream stares, open mouthed and hurt, as Hob decidedly ignores him for Netflix. He gets up angrily and stomps around the kitchen, tearing open the cabinets looking for something to eat, and also more water because now he has a pounding headache as his body struggles to sober up now that he’s no longer drinking.
“Dream!” Hob exclaims, getting up when Dream slams more than one cabinet door closed. “Come on, don’t be like this.”
“Like what?” Dream sneers, stuffing a potato chip into his mouth angrily. “I came all this way just to fuck you, didn’t I?”
“You’re drunk,” Hob points out.
“I’m always drunk when we have sex,” Dream argues, crossing his arms, chip bag still in hand. “You’ve never had a problem with it before.”
“Yeah well, I’m not drunk now, and I’m also not in the mood,” Hob replies angrily.
“Then why the hell did you invite me over?” Dream growls.
“I don’t know!” Hob exclaims, throwing his hands up in defeat. “I wasn’t thinking, obviously,” he adds, then gestures to Dream. “How was I supposed to know you’d be like this?”
Dream huffs, then carelessly tosses the bag of chips onto the counter. A few stray chips scatter across the counter, but Dream doesn’t care. Clearly Hob didn’t want him around, not for sex, and definitely not to comfort Dream after the awful day he’d had, so there was no point in staying.
“Fine, I’ll go,” Dream says, moving towards the door where he’d kicked off his shoes. He decides he’ll check the train times on the walk over.
“Dream,” Hob says, grabbing his arm before he can make it to the hallway. “It’s late. Come on. Let’s go to sleep.”
“I can get home on my own just fine,” Dream argues, raising his chin defiantly.
“No,” Hob replies, his voice stern as he grips Dream’s arm tighter. “Come on, let’s just go to bed. You need to sleep this off.”
“I can sleep on the couch,” Dream says, yanking his arm out of Hob’s grip. “Since you’re not interested in fucking my bad day out of me.”
“Dream, stop being so fucking difficult!” Hob yells, shocking both of them.
The echo of Hob’s roar hangs tensely between them, and Hob steps back from Dream with a hand over his mouth, clearly horrified at what he’s done. Dream also feels the prick of tears in his eyes as he processes just how angry Hob actually has been with him all night.
How the hell had this night gotten worse? Dream doesn’t know, but what he does know is that he needs to leave before he starts drunkenly crying in Hob’s apartment, and Hob is the last person Dream wants to see him like this.
Dream tries making his way towards the door again, but Hob seems to regain his senses and physically blocks him. Dream tries to push him, then tries to hit Hob’s shoulder to make him move, but Hob grabs Dream’s wrist to stop him.
“I’m sorry,” Hob says, his voice much softer this time, laced with regret and pity. Dream hates it. “I lost my temper, I shouldn’t have done that,” he adds.
“Fuck off!” Dream yells, and oh. No. No, no, no, no. Dream furiously blinks back the tears before they can start falling, even if he can’t stop the pained hiccups that betray his emotional state from leaving his mouth.
“Just—” Dream gasps, then forces himself to breathe, slow and deep, and then counts to five. “Let me go home. You don’t—” his breath hitches again, cutting off what he wants to say. Fuck. He couldn’t even string together a full sentence if he tried.
“Dream, please,” Hob replies, his voice practically begging now. “Don’t leave. I don’t want you going home alone like this.” Dream turns to meet Hob eyes, and his anger dissipates slightly when he sees how devastated Hob looks.
Despite how awful Dream feels, even he knows it’d be a mistake to go home in his current state. He’s highly emotional, drunk, and likely wouldn’t be paying attention to his surroundings. He could get mugged, or worse.
“Fine,” Dream finally relents. Hob lets out a sigh of relief, and hugs him. Dream doesn’t hug him back. He’s still angry after all.
But Dream lets Hob wrangle him down the hall to the bedroom, and then he strips down to his underwear to sleep, since he doesn’t have any of his own clothes here. And why would he? It’s not like they’re anything other than an occasional hookup after all.
Hob does offer Dream a shirt and pajama pants to wear, but Dream tosses them away from him without so much as a second glance. Hob sighs at Dream, and then shuts off the lights, turning away from Dream without another word to sleep. He’s clearly still frustrated with Dream too.
Dream lies there next to Hob, feeling cold and rejected and lonely. He hates everything about this. Hates that Hob let him come over and make a fool out of himself when he could have easily just told Dream to fuck off and go home instead. Hates that Hob even came onto him in the first place, all those months ago, and now they’re here, in this weird in-between state where they're together but not together.
Dream realizes too late that he really hadn’t cared if they had sex or not either. He’d wanted comfort more than anything, comfort from Hob specifically. But the only comfort he knew that came from Hob was sex. And that’s the worst part of it. Dream knows now, without a doubt, that he has feelings for Hob. That he wants more out of this than what they’re doing now, but he’s not sure Hob does. At this point, he’s too afraid to ask.
Hob’s bedroom suddenly feels like a suffocating prison as all of Dream’s feelings hit him at once. He’s going to cry again if he stays, and he really doesn’t want Hob to see him like this. He doesn’t want Hob to know just how badly he’s gotten under Dream’s skin.
Dream realizes he needs to leave. He’s stone cold sober now, having laid here in the dark with nothing but his thoughts and his third glass of water now emptied on the bedside table. He listens carefully for the evening out of Hob’s breath, then shuffles around in bed to see if any of his movements disturb the other man. When he’s certain that Hob is deep in sleep, Dream hurriedly dresses himself, checks to see that there’s still trains running this late at night, and then rushes out when he sees the next one is in just 15 minutes. Hob lives about 12 minutes from the nearest station. Dream can make it if he runs.
The front door slams loudly behind him as he leaves, but Dream doesn’t care. Hob probably won’t even notice that he’s gone.
Dream makes it to the station just as the train is pulling into the stop. As he’s getting on, he hears yelling and frantic running, the sounds of someone about to miss the train. Dream considers holding the doors until he sees just who's rushing towards the train.
It's Hob. Hob who is barely dressed, and running down the steps to the train platform in nothing but sweatpants and slippers. He catches Dream's eyes and waves frantically to get his attention. Dream’s heart flutters momentarily, and he imagines that maybe he was wrong about everything after all. That maybe there’s more to what’s been happening between them than just rebound sex.
Dream gets on the train anyways, and the doors shut just as Hob reaches the platform, and the train pulls away.
-----------------
They pretend like nothing is wrong after that night. Hob had texted Dream the next morning to ask if he’d gotten home okay, and Dream had left him on read. He had far more important things to worry about that morning, like his pounding headache and the fact that he needed to talk to his editor at some point.
When he finally fights off the last of his hangover, Dream has a much more pleasant conversation with his editing team, who he apologizes to for losing his temper. His team apologizes to him as well, which he doesn’t expect, but they reassure him it’s their job to encourage him, not discourage him from writing. They have a candid conversation about communication, and then agree on a plan to move forward with his book.
Dream happily shares the good news with his group chat, still ignoring the direct message from Hob. He credits Lucienne for talking him off the ledge the night before, and the flood of positive and congratulatory messages flows easily after that. Even from Hob.
Dream sighs when he reads the other man’s message in their group chat, then flips back to their private conversation. He really should apologize for his behavior as well, but he has no idea how to explain himself without revealing more than he’s comfortable with. So Dream turns off his phone, and goes back to working on his novel, hoping that maybe he’ll come up with something to say later in the evening.
He never does end up replying. Hob doesn’t privately message him either after that.
-----------------
It’s trivia night at the White Horse, and Dream would normally be excited to go and show off his arcane knowledge, but tonight he’s dreading the occasion. It’s been a month since he and Hob had last seen each other and he really has no idea how he’s supposed to act around the other man. Do they pretend like nothing ever happened between them? They haven’t spoken since, so things were clearly over between them.
Dream’s still trying to tell himself it’s better this way. They were hurtling towards disaster, and Dream should’ve really known better, should’ve known that he really can’t do casual after all, and now he’s probably permanently fucked up his friendship with Hob because he couldn’t keep his own feelings in check. He still hasn’t apologized, he doesn’t know if Hob even wants an apology from him at this point, or if he just wants to forget about everything that ever happened between them.
So when Dream’s sister texts him and tells him she’s in town for a few days, Dream jumps at the opportunity to meet her and cancel on trivia night plans. He receives a variety of boos and ‘we’ll lose without you!’ responses, all of which make him smile despite himself. Even Hob laments the loss of Dream’s knowledge for the evening.
When Dream arrives at The New Inn later that night, it’s not only his sister that greets him. Eleanor is with her. Dream hasn’t seen her since she and Hob broke up. When she’d moved across the country, she left the group chat and hasn’t really talked to anyone since. Dream had missed her, if he were being honest with himself. Even though Hob had said the breakup was amicable, and that Eleanor had only left the chat because she couldn’t be part of their plans any longer, Dream was still sad to see her go. He realizes he could’ve tried harder to keep in touch with her, but then everything with Hob had happened and well.
Dream wants to hug Eleanor and also scream at her. Wants to unload what a horrible last month he’s had, and also wants her to never find out he’d been sleeping with her ex. It’s not her fault that Dream fell into bed with Hob knowing he wasn’t over his relationship with her yet. It’s entirely her fault for being so perfect, however, that there’s no way Dream could ever compare, and that’s why Hob won’t look at him when they have sex.
When they had sex. Dream and Hob have barely spoken since that night, and only in their group chat. He’s pretty sure Hob doesn’t want to even be in the same room as Dream right now, for how ugly Dream had acted over what was supposed to be just a casual hookup.
“Not that I’m unhappy to see you, Ellie,” Dream says, giving both her and his sister a hug before taking a seat across from them. “But what are you doing back in town?”
“Dream—” Didi starts, but then Eleanor places a hand on her shoulder and stops her.
“We’re dating,” Eleanor says bluntly, moving her hand from Didi’s shoulder down to her hand. Their fingers interlace and Dream’s eyes boggle as he looks between them, shocked.
“When did this happen?” he asks, settling himself in for what must be an extremely interesting story.
Eleanor and Didi take turns recalling the story of how they met through a local meetup for knitters in Seattle, and how Didi had recognized Eleanor from one time she’d come out drinking with Dream and his friends years ago. Happy to have a familiar face, Didi and Eleanor had become fast friends, and they both realized they had a lot in common too.
Before either of them knew it, Eleanor was inviting Didi out everywhere as they explored their new city together, and Didi became accustomed to calling Eleanor after every shift at the hospital. One thing led to another, and then another, and now they’re practically attached at the hip. Didi even shyly admits they’ve talked about moving in together.
The two of them beam at him when they’re done with their story and Dream wants to congratulate them. Wants to be happy that his favorite sister is dating one of his oldest friends. He wants to make plans to visit them in their new home, maybe even help them move if he can work out the logistics. He hasn’t been out to Seattle in some time, and he really could use a vacation.
“I started sleeping with Hob after you left,” is what Dream says instead.
Eleanor spits her (thankfully white) wine all over Didi, who freezes in place, staring at Dream in shock. Dream stares back, horrified both at what he just said, and what followed after. He braces himself, expecting Eleanor to explode on him, to call him a slut, a bad friend, a terrible human being.
Instead, Eleanor starts laughing. Didi does too eventually.
“Oh my god, of course he did,” Eleanor wheezes as she doubles over in her seat. Their server rushes over, bringing some extra napkins and Didi excuses herself to the restroom to wipe off the rest of the wine. Dream and Eleanor are left staring at one another in silence, before Eleanor breaks the tension with another giggle.
“I’m sorry,” she apologizes. “I’m not laughing at you, really, just the whole situation. Imagine if you brought Hob with you tonight?” she practically squeals.
“I—you’re not mad?” Dream asks, more shocked than anything. Eleanor just shrugs and drinks from her water glass this time, instead of her wine.
“I mean, did Hob at least wait a day before he tried to make a move on you?” Eleanor asks. “Not that it matters really, we were broken up before I left but well, you know. Respectful turnaround time and all that.”
“I—” Dream stutters, trying desperately to recall when that first time with Hob actually happened. “I mean, I think it was a few weeks after you left?”
Eleanor snorts. “Good enough, I guess.”
“Sorry,” Dream says, shaking his head as Didi returns and sits back down next to Eleanor. “I’m still trying to wrap my head around this. Did you know he wanted to—?”
“Oh no, no,” Eleanor says then starts laughing again. “Our breakup wasn’t planned or anything, don’t worry. It’s just that, well. He told me he wanted to stay with you guys more than me, so I’m not that surprised?”
“What?” Dream says, dumbly. “But you both said the breakup was mutual.” Eleanor sighs.
“I mean,” she replies. “It was technically mutual. But Hob wanted to stay in Boston, and I didn’t. And one of our last arguments before I left was about abandoning our friends.” She shrugs again. “I love you all, don’t get me wrong, but I really love living out in Seattle more. Especially the company.” She smiles at Didi, who kisses her on the cheek. “It kind of sucked that Hob really didn’t want to move, but it wouldn’t have been fair to ask him to do it all just for me and my career goals.”
“Oh,” Dream says dumbly. “Yeah, I guess that makes sense.” Dream wouldn’t have wanted to leave Boston for any reason either, so it makes sense, he thinks. Boston is just that. It’s home.
“It’ll make double dating a little weird, though,” Eleanor adds, and Didi laughs.
“I think we’ll be fine though,” Didi adds, then turns her focus to Dream. “So tell us about you and Hob,” she says.
“I—we’re not,” Dream stammers, unsure of how to proceed further with the conversation. Eleanor and Didi’s expressions both fall.
“Oh, Dream,” Didi says, reaching out to take his hand. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to put you on the spot.”
“It’s fine,” Dream says though he feels anything but. “I don’t—it didn’t last long between us,” he admits.
“Wow, he fumbled the bag on you?” Eleanor interjects, shock clearly painted on her face. “My god, he really is an idiot.”
“No I—we had a fight,” Dream says, unsure of why he feels the need to clarify. “It was my fault really. I shouldn’t have—he wasn’t ready to commit.”
Eleanor makes a confused face.
“That—doesn’t sound like Hob,” Eleanor says after a moment, and Dream huffs in annoyance.
“You only knew him while you were dating, how would you know that?” Dream retorts.
“Because he told me he’s never done casual,” Eleanor replies. “When we first started seeing each other, he basically said just that. That’s what I liked about him, he wanted to do the whole commitment thing right away, even if it didn’t end up working out.”
“Well maybe he’s changed,” Dream says, far more grumpily than he intended. “He’s never said shit to me about anything, and still hasn’t, so it doesn’t matter.”
“Dream,” Didi says gently, squeezing his hand. “Are you okay?”
“It’s fine,” Dream insists, not wanting to go into the details of how he’d terribly fucked up his situation with Hob.
“You don’t sound fine at all,” Didi replies.
“Maybe we shouldn’t have this conversation at dinner though?” Eleanor interjects, looking concernedly at him. Dream huffs and then pouts. Eleanor was always hyper attuned to when people were upset, especially Dream.
But Dream does want to talk about it, even if it is a bit awkward, all things considered. Eleanor seems to at least be willing to hear Dream out, if nothing else.
They wrap up their bill quickly, taking some of their dinner to go, and find their way over to Dream’s apartment, where he spends the rest of the night wrapped up in a blanket while he recounts the past six months to his sister and Eleanor. There’s also, perhaps, a lot of wine involved. Solely because Eleanor had decided it was also girls night and they needed a lot of wine for a proper one.
“I’m going to murder him myself,” Eleanor says, holding up her bottle of wine when Dream finishes telling her everything that had happened up until now.
“El, no,” Dream whines. He’s really more embarrassed about the whole situation now than anything. Talking things over with the two of them had really helped, and Dream wonders if he should’ve talked to Lucienne, or even Jessamy and Matthew to start. Maybe he wouldn’t have let things go so far the way they did between him and Hob.
“Nah, he deserves it,” Eleanor replies, taking another swig from her bottle.
“It’s really my fault,” Dream tries to insist, knowing it’s useless to defend Hob to his own ex. “I knew he wasn’t over you and I—”
“No, Dream, listen to me,” Eleanor says, taking Dream’s face in her hands. “He never—” she turns away from him suddenly and then burps. Dream laughs, despite himself.
“He never what?” Dream asks when Eleanor turns back to face him. She sighs.
“He never told you why he turns off the lights, and that’s on him,” Eleanor tells him.
“I—what?” Dream says dumbly. Hob turned off the lights with Eleanor too?
“Yeah, he—” Eleanor hiccups and then starts giggling. She releases Dream’s face and then falls back onto Didi, who’s sitting behind her on the couch. “He’s sensitive, you know? About—” she gestures at her front, “All the hair he has. Hates it when people see it. I think we had sex with the lights on like, twice, at most.” She pauses and then regards Dream, her expression sombering. “I thought you knew.”
“Why would I know that?” Dream asks, dumfounded. Hob had never given any indicator that he was sensitive about any part of his body, and no one in their friend group had ever commented on it.
“Because,” Eleanor replies, gesturing wildly. “Think about it. Whenever we went to the beach or anything together, did you ever see him take his shirt off? Or at the pool at Matthew and Jessamy’s place?”
“I—” Dream filters through his memory, which is an especially difficult task considering how drunk they are. He realizes that Eleanor’s right.
“Shit.” Dream groans. “I think I fucked up.”
“No, no, he did,” Eleanor insists. “I always told him I didn’t mind all the hair,” she adds then sighs. “I mean it’s a lot, but it never bothered me, you know?”
“It’s never bothered me either,” Dream admits. He’d rather liked the differences in their bodies actually. Hob was broad where Dream was lanky, naturally tan and sunkissed where Dream was pale. Dream had never had an opinion on chest hair before, what little hair he’d had it was so fine and thin that his chest looked bare anyways. But Eleanor was right. Dream had never really seen Hob casually uncovered. And while he was always eager to undress Dream when the lights were still on, Hob almost never fully undressed himself until after he’d shut them off.
It seems so obvious now, in retrospect. But Dream had been caught up in his own insecurities to really notice that Hob had any of his own to address.
“I honestly thought he didn’t want to look at me when he turned off the lights,” Dream confesses. “That maybe he was hoping he could pretend I was someone else in the dark.”
“Okay, I’m with my girlfriend,” Didi says suddenly, a murderous look in her eyes. “I’m a doctor, I can make it look like an accident,” she adds, holding up her weird hand mixed cocktail that has hot sauce in it.
“Didi!” Dream exclaims. “No murder,” he orders, then laughs at the absurdity of the entire situation. They all start laughing, and Dream feels something unwind in his chest when they do. He thinks about texting Hob, but ultimately decides against it. What he wants to tell him, he wants to do it sober, and in person.
Dream wakes up the next morning extremely hungover, and orders breakfast for delivery. Didi and Eleanor try to insist on paying him back, but he waves away their money, and tells them they can buy him dinner when he flies out to see them move. They both hug him fiercely on their way out and make him promise to see them at least one more time before they fly back to Seattle.
-----------------
A week after his conversation with his sister and Eleanor, Dream is outside Hob’s apartment door, pacing nervously as he rehearses everything he wants to say to Hob. His apology. His request to start things over, if Hob still wants to try. How he’s really been feeling about their whole not-relationship status.
Really, he’s just stalling knocking on Hob’s door. What if Hob doesn’t answer when he sees it’s Dream? What if he tells Dream to go away without even hearing him out? What if—
Dream groans and then mentally slaps himself. He needs to stop worrying himself unnecessarily. Either Hob will want to hear him out or he won’t. But Dream needs to at least try.
He’s about to raise his hand to finally knock on the door, when suddenly he hears Hob’s voice, distinctly from not inside the apartment.
“Dream?” Hob asks. Dream turns in the direction of his voice and finds Hob standing at the end of the hall, groceries in hand. Dream realizes he’s been an idiot standing in front of a completely empty apartment.
“Hi,” Dream says, every rehearsed speech and romantic gesture he’d just been rehearsing evaporating from his mind like wisps of smoke.
“Hi,” Hob replies, his voice flat. He looks tired, but not angry at least, to see Dream. “Did you need something?” he asks as he walks slowly towards his front door, eyeing Dream a little suspiciously. Dream can’t really blame him. Their last interaction had ended rather poorly.
“I—can we talk?” Dream asks, stepping aside so Hob can put his key in the lock. Hob sighs and his shoulders droop, like he’s been dreading this exact situation.
“Sure,” Hob replies, putting on a fake cheerful demeanor as he opens the door to let himself and Dream in.
“Do you need help with anything?” Dream asks, trailing Hob towards the kitchen.
“If you want,” Hob replies, setting the groceries down onto the counter. But before Dream can start unpacking anything, he sighs again and groans.
“Actually, Dream,” Hob says, turning around and facing him head on. “Let’s just talk now.”
“Uhm—okay,” Dream replies, now feeling incredibly nervous. Hob looks at him expectantly, crossing his arms as he waits for Dream to gather his thoughts.
Finally, Dream says, “I wanted to say I’m sorry. About everything that happened last time I was here.”
His apology seems to surprise Hob, who suddenly straightens up from his leaning position against the counter.
“Oh,” Hob replies, sounding dumbstruck. “I—I’m sorry too,” he offers, uncrossing his arms and running a hand through his hair. Dream realizes it’s longer than the last time he’d seen it. “I shouldn’t have lost my temper at you that night.”
“To be fair, I was being an ass,” Dream admits, even though it pains him to do so.
“Yeah but you had a reason to be,” Hob says. “I was just feeling sorry for myself for no reason and I took it out on you.”
“I still took my shitty day out on you,” Dream replies, shrugging. “So I guess we were both not at our best that night.”
“I guess not,” Hob accepts, with a small smile. “We’re okay then?”
Dream nods. “Yes,” he says, offering a small smile himself, then stepping towards Hob. “Why were you feeling sorry for yourself?” Hob’s expression shutters closed again, and he shakes his head.
“It’s not important,” he says, turning away and refusing to meet Dream’s eyes.
“Hob,” Dream says, taking another step closer and reaching out to take the other man’s hand in his. “It’s important to me,” he adds.
Hob sighs, and then turns his eyes to the ceiling. When he meets Dream’s gaze again, he looks pained.
“I’m not good at being casual Dream,” Hob tells him bluntly, and Dream feels a sense of deja vu run through him like a live wire. “If we’re going to keep doing…this, I want there to be a commitment. It’s not just sex to me.”
It’s almost identical to what Eleanor had said about Hob to Dream a week prior. Dream suddenly feels wretched for not noticing sooner, but also indignant, because why had Hob assumed that wasn’t what Dream wanted as well?
“Hob,” Dream says, as calmly as he can manage, before he squeezes Hob’s hand tightly. “What made you think I didn’t want the same things?”
Hob’s face falls. He looks intently at Dream’s face, and whatever he finds there only seems to upset him further.
“I—I don’t know,” Hob admits, before he groans and places his free hand over his face. Dream finds it a bit comforting that he hasn’t tried to remove Dream’s hand over his other one.
“I’ve read this whole thing wrong, haven’t I?” Hob says through his hand, before slapping his forehead. “I’m a fucking idiot.”
“You’re not,” Dream says, before he takes Hob’s free hand as well. “And to be fair,” he adds, “it’s occurred to me recently that I may have, as well. We’ve never talked about—about this,” he gestures between them. “Us. We just sort of skip to the sex.”
“Well, we have been drunk every time,” Hob replies. “You said so yourself.”
“Not—every time,” Dream says. “After Matthew got food poisoning, when I thought that you had invited me out on a date, we only had one drink each that we didn’t finish.”
“Wait,” Hob stutters, his whole body going rigid. “You thought I had invited you out for a date? That’s why—,” his eyes widen suddenly. “That’s why you wore the blazer.”
Dream blushes furiously and now it is his turn to look away from Hob’s scrutinizing gaze. “You don’t have to rub it in.”
“No I’m not I—,” Hob groans again, and then, unexpectedly, pulls his hands free before dropping his head down on Dream’s shoulder. Dream startles when he feels Hob’s arms suddenly wrap around his waist shortly after.
“I had no idea. None at all,” Hob confesses, then groans again. “God I would’ve taken you somewhere nicer if I knew you wanted it to be a date.”
Dream shrugs, then reaches up to pat Hob on the back. “It’s fine. Really.”
“Not really, but we can agree to disagree,” Hob replies, before he tilts his head slightly up to look at Dream “Can I get a do-over on that then?” he asks. “Take you out on a proper date?”
Dream wants that, he realizes. Desperately. So he nods.
“I do want that,” Dream says honestly. “But—”
“Oh God, there’s a ‘but’,” Hob groans before he straightens and untangles himself from Dream. Dream already misses the warmth of Hob’s body.
“It’s not a bad ‘but’,” Dream replies. “But there’s something that’s been bothering me since we—since all this started,” he finishes. “I want to make sure we’re really on the same page.”
Hob nods. “Okay, sure. What is it?” he asks.
Dream takes a deep breath to brace himself, and then looks Hob directly in the eye. Now or never, he supposes.
“Why do you turn off the lights?” Dream asks.
Hob blinks, slow, then suddenly blushes a furious red before he buries his face in his hands.
“Aw, come on Dream,” Hob sighs. “It’s really embarrassing.”
Dream softens a bit, but remains resolute. Eleanor had told him what she thought had been the problem all along, but he still needs to hear it from Hob himself.
“I need to know, Hob,” Dream insists.
“Why?” Hob asks, then sighs again. “I mean, I don’t know, it’s pretty obvious isn’t it? I’m not really much to look at, you know,” he says, gesturing to himself.
“Not much to look at?” Dream asks, unable to keep the disbelief out of his voice.
“I know, it’s stupid,” Hob sighs, running a hand over his face. “But I mean, Dream, look at you. You’re gorgeous and I’m…I don’t know, not that?”
“I’m still not following,” Dream says, still confused but also growing more and more uneasy about what Hob is implying. “Did you…did you really not think I was attracted to you? At all?”
“No, I—I just—,” Hob stutters. “I don’t know what I thought, honestly,” he says, looking guilty. “I just—I’m not as confident as you about how I look naked,” he adds, gesturing to his front, and Dream’s heart sinks at the confirmation of yet another thing Eleanor had told him. “I thought…maybe you’d change your mind about being with me. If you saw, well— everything.”
“Everything,” Dream replies flatly.
“I mean, you know I’m really…hairy,” Hob says, before he winces. “And well, I’m not really in shape or anything like that either…” he trails off, looking even more guilty with every new word that comes out of his mouth. Like he’s only just realizing now that he pushed his anxieties about his body onto Dream, who clearly hasn't noticed any of the things Hob's insecure about.
“So…what?” Dream says, suddenly feeling indignance and hurt creep into his voice. “You just assumed I wouldn’t find you attractive unless I was drunk and we had sex in the dark?”
“Wait, what?” Hob exclaims.
“Am I really that shallow sounding to you?” Dream continues, already feeling his emotions start to get the better of him.
“No, oh god, no,” Hob replies immediately. “Dream, I don’t know what’s brought this on, but swear it had nothing to do with you. I was just stupid and insecure about myself, and I wasn’t thinking properly. I’m sorry, I really had no idea it bothered you so much.”
A somewhat tense and awkward silence falls between them. Dream mulls over what Hob has told him, feeling wretched about how deeply they’ve both misunderstood one another. But he had come here to clear those misunderstandings after all. Hob had admitted his insecurities. Now Dream had to as well.
“I actually thought—” Dream says, then takes a shuddering breath to calm himself. “I thought you turned the lights off because you didn’t want to look at me,” he finally admits. “Because I wasn’t who you really wanted to be with.”
Hob’s eyes widen, first in shock, then horror. “Wait you thought that I—”
“Was using me as a stand-in for Eleanor?” Dream finishes. He wraps his arms around himself and then looks away, refusing to meet Hob’s eyes. He feels like a coward for doing so but Dream knows he’ll lose his resolve to admit everything he’d been bottling up if he does. “The first time we slept together, I assumed you were only looking for a rebound. And when we never talked about it after, or told our friends I—”
“Fuck, Dream,” Hob interrupts, grabbing him suddenly and hugging Dream to his chest. “I had no idea, I—fuck, I’m so sorry I made you feel like that.”
Dream sniffles, wrapping his own arms around Hob, shrugging helplessly.
“I should have said something sooner,” Dream says. “But I let it—fester instead. I had no idea that you thought you weren’t attractive to me either. But Hob,” he adds, turning his head to meet Hob’s eyes again, hoping he looks as serious as he feels. “I don’t just sleep with people I’m not attracted to. Regardless of how much alcohol is involved.”
Hob nods. “Yeah. I—I’m still sorry about everything though.”
“Me too,” Dream replies, then adds, a bit more quietly. “I like the hair, actually.” Hob chokes out a noise that seems half between a laugh and a sob.
“You don’t have to say—” he starts but Dream shushes him.
“I mean it, Hob,” Dream says, before he works a hand between them to pet the small patch of hair peeking out from beneath Hob’s shirt. “I think it suits you. And I would like to be able to fully appreciate it.”
When he looks up at Hob, the other man’s eyes are a bit watery. But then Hob blinks rapidly, and sniffles, before he hugs Dream even more tightly to himself.
“Stay the night?” Hob asks. “Not for—not for sex. Just stay with me?”
Dream nods against Hob’s shoulder. “Okay.”
Hob makes a decision to order takeout instead of making dinner like he originally planned, citing that he’d rather spend time talking with Dream anyways. They still put away the groceries, which helps release a lot of the emotional tension that had built up between them, and Dream enjoys the warm, domestic feel of the activity.
Once their food arrives, they settle on Hob’s couch and talk late into the night about everything and nothing. Hob catches Dream up on what missed during trivia when he was out with Didi, and Dream shyly admits that Didi had not been the only person he’d talked to that evening. Hob stares at him, equal parts awestruck and mortified, as Dream recalls his conversations with Eleanor and Didi, and how he found out they were dating.
“So what you’re saying is, I’m lucky to have my bits still attached?” Hob jokes.
“Hob,” Dream chastises him, bumping their shoulders together. “That’s not nice.”
“You didn’t date Eleanor,” Hob retorts. “She’s terrifying, do you know how many serial killer documentaries she used to watch?”
Dream did, in fact, know this. He had been subject to many episodes of Cold Case Files growing up with Didi, and his knowledge had been how he and Eleanor had first become friends. Dream suspects Eleanor’s deep passion for them is actually one of the reasons why she and Didi get along so well.
“Hob,” Dream says, a new worry now crossing his mind. “Are you—okay—with all of this?” he waves vaguely. “With Didi dating your ex while we—?” He trails off. They still haven’t really decided on what their official relationship status would be going forward, and Dream doesn’t want to presume.
Hob nudges Dream with his shoulder, and then kisses the top of his head.
“Yeah, I am,” Hob answers sincerely. “I mean—it’s never not going to suck that we broke up,” he adds. “But we had our time, and if she’s happy then I’m happy too.”
Dream nods. “That’s good to hear,” he says.
“Are you okay with it?” Hob asks. Dream hums.
“I am,” he answers, then huffs a laugh. “I did offer to help them move into their new place, though.”
Hob groans. “Does this mean I have to help too as part of my good boyfriend duties?” he asks.
Dream’s potsticker falls out of his mouth mid chew, hits his knee, and then falls to the floor.
“Shit!” Dream exclaims, putting his food on the coffee table before bending down to pick up the stray dumpling.
“I—did I say something wrong?” Hob asks, worry now clear in his voice. Dream shakes his head and then flops against Hob’s shoulder.
“You said nothing wrong,” Dream says into Hob’s shoulder, his face now flushed with embarrassment. “I was just surprised, is all. You—you said it so easily.”
“Boyfriend, you mean?” Hob asks, now in a teasing tone. “Do you like it?”
Dream nods, feeling ridiculous about being done in by a single word. But Hob doesn’t seem to mind.
“I like it too,” is all he says, before he places a hand underneath Dream’s chin and kisses him.
-----------------
As they’re getting ready for bed, Dream feels a thrum of excitement, even though they’ve still agreed that sex is off the table for the night. They’re both far too tired and emotionally drained from the evening to put in the effort anyways.
But then Hob is holding out his arm for Dream to snuggle into, and Dream feels like a teenanger as he curls up against Hob’s chest and rests his head on it.
“Fair warning that you’re going to wake up sweaty if you stay here all night,” Hob tells him. Dream knows he doesn’t mean to sound so self-deprecating, but now that he knows just how deep Hob’s insecurities run, it breaks his heart a little.
“That’s fine,” Dream says, pressing himself even closer. He can feel Hob’s chest hair poking through the thin material of his undershirt. Dream rubs his face into it, enjoying the rough, scratchy texture against his check. Hob laughs at Dream’s actions, and Dream hums in contentment. He really did like the feel of Hob’s chest hair. It was surprisingly soft in certain places, and warm. Maybe Dream would wake up because he’s too warm in the middle of the night. Maybe he won’t. He’s just glad that now he gets the opportunity to find out.
“You don’t have to pretend to be enthusiastic about it,” Hob says as Dream nuzzles him again.
“I’m not,” Dream replies, rolling his eyes. “It feels…nice.”
“Sure,” Hob replies. “Say that again in the morning.”
Dream does in fact, say something similar to that effect in the morning. He says it while he sits atop Hob’s lap, Dream gripping the thick pelt of hair for purchase as he ruts himself desperately against Hob.
They’ve never had sex in the morning. In the bright light of day. Somehow it’s even more intimate than what Dream imagines having sex with the lights on must feel like and he loves it. Hob is looking at Dream like he’s something divine, like he can’t quite believe that what they’re doing is really happening. Dream thinks he’ll never let Hob turn off the lights again when they do this. He never again wants to miss a single second of seeing the way Hob looks at him, at how stunning Hob’s entire body looks and feels when pressed against Dream’s. His new goal, for however long it takes, is that Hob never questions Dream’s attraction to him ever again.
When they’ve both reached their peaks, Dream collapses on top of Hob, uncaring of the sticky mess between them. Hob’s chest is warm and broad, and Dream finds himself slowly drifting back to sleep. Hob groans after a while, however, wriggling beneath the weight of Dream's body, and disturbing his otherwise peaceful post-coital rest.
“Okay, this is sweet and all, but now I’m the one that's too hot,” Hob whines, pushing gently at Dream’s shoulder. Dream laughs, a brazen, awful honking noise that he’s always been insecure about. But Hob had told him the night before that he loves Dream’s laugh, and Dream can see now that the other man wasn’t lying. He’s looking at Dream softly, so full of affection that Dream nearly forgets he needs to move and just stares at Hob for a while.
“What?” Hob asks, his eyes crinkled with happiness.
“Nothing,” Dream replies, smiling back before he moves off of his boyfriend’s chest.
Hob gets up from the bed once Dream rolls off of him and heads towards the bathroom. He comes back with two warm washcloths to wipe themselves off with. When they’re both done, he tosses both cloths in the direction of the hamper, missing his target by mere inches.
“Close enough,” Hob says.
“That’ll leave a wet spot on your carpet,” Dream tells him, already seeing his prediction start to come true.
“I’ll get to it later,” Hob replies before he kisses Dream, languid and slow and perfect. “I have more important things to do today.”
#dreamling#dream of the endless/hob gadling#hob x morpheus#dreamling bingo#dreamling bingo 2024#seiya writes#seiya writes dreamling#angst angst angst
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Light On - single mom/neighbor fic Simon Riley/female reader 🎄Simon has himself a merry little Christmas - for @glitterypirateduck's cod holiday challenge
Simon opens his eyes to an empty bed on Christmas morning.
His breath catches in his chest when his hand slides across the sheets, instinctively seeking the warmth of your body, only to discover your side of the bed empty.
His rational, tactical, professional mind tells him you've probably just gotten up with the baby. That for some reason, he slept too deeply and didn't wake up when she did this morning, like he usually does. You're in the guest room, Emmaline's room, now, or in the kitchen. Maybe you're already drinking your first cup of coffee. You're fine. The baby is fine. Nothing is wrong.
But his heart... his heart screams. Terror ices his veins, adrenaline and fear taking control of his gross motor skills, legs twisting beneath him as he stumbles out of bed and races for the door. They’re fine, they’re fine, they’re fine-
“Sweetheart?” His voice betrays him. He sounds stressed, anxiety piquing, frantically turning the corner into the kitchen. Not again, he can’t do this again, this can’t happen again…
It’s empty. The front door is still locked, and so is the patio’s, twinkling Christmas tree glowing in the late dawn light. His mind splits. Check Emmaline’s room, they’re probably in there, get control of yourself… and… the glock 19 is closest, should still be under the top shelf, call Price, mobilize the team-
“Simon?” He whirls at the sound of your voice, air rushing out of his lungs, drawing into a relieved laugh. Emmaline is on your hip in a green, white, and red striped elf costume, complete with a pointed hat, jingle bell dangling from the top. “Morning.” You smile, and so does the baby. “Santa’s elf wanted to surprise you.” You’re still a little sleepy, eyes tired, and he does a double take when he realizes you’re in your underwear and one of his t shirts.
“I’m… surprised.” Bloody hell. His brain isn’t working, his mouth rendering him stupid, still caught in fight or flight, and your lips subtly twist before your eyes soften, realization soft across your features.
“Are you okay?” You question, and he nods, not trusting himself to not say something else moronic, flailing in the silence, failing. It’s been weeks since he’s felt like this, inept, clumsy, senseless, too easily settled into a life with you after that pipe burst in your flat and practically delivered him a holiday miracle, a treasure deposited right into his lap. “Here,” you push Emma into his arms, soft fingers over top his as you hand her off, looking up at him with that level trust, adoration that you’re always providing him, in your eyes. Just holding Emmaline settles the anxiety in his heart, soothes the raw buzzing that’s tearing through his head, and you smile, butting your head into his shoulder and placing a kiss there. “Will you take her while I get dressed?”
“Yeah.” He croaks, as you squeeze his forearm, turning away. “Sweetheart,” he calls, stopping you in your tracks. He wants to tell you he thinks he loves you; he thinks he’d die without you; he thinks you’re the greatest thing he’s ever had, ever held, thinks you saved him, but nothing comes out. You hold his gaze for a second, and then two, before whispering.
“I know… me too.” Of course you do. You pause, cocking your head. “Could you make some coffee? Gonna be a long day.” You raise an eyebrow towards the Christmas tree, where all of Emma’s gifts sit perfectly arranged, and he nods. He can do that.
“Just three scoops of this,” he tells Emma, portioning out the coffee into the filter as she babbles at him from her perch in his other arm. “Mama likes it pretty strong, doesn’t she? And then some water, like this.” He pours the pitcher into the machine’s reservoir, flicking on the power and listening to the gurgle as he makes his way to the couch. He bounces Emma on his knee, little hands waving in the air, trying to grab the end of her hat and gnaw on it. The tree sparkles behind her, lights and ornaments all aglow, and she giggles when she tips herself forward, planting onto his chest with both hands. “Easy, baby girl.” Rolling onto her back in the crook of his arm, she squirms, smiling up at him, finger extended towards his chin. “What is it, eh?” He leans, and she pokes his cheek, cooing with a satisfied grunt. She fits so naturally in his side, just like you do, and he settles into the cushions, relaxing, allowing her to explore, tactile touch padding across his face, little fingernails scratching at his stubble.
“You two look cozy.” You murmur with a yawn, cup of coffee steaming in your palms. He smiles, and Emma lifts her head to look for you, tracking the sound of your voice. You perch at his other side, knees tucking up next to his hip, nestling your head against his shoulder, fingers tracing Emmaline’s cheek. “Whatcha doing sweet pea?” He brushes a kiss across the top of your head, and you sigh, arm wrapping around his stomach. "This is nice."
"It is." He agrees. It's more than nice, it's everything. Everything he didn't know was possible, everything he didn't know he wanted. It's nice, spending Christmas with his girls, cuddled up together on his couch in front of a Christmas tree that's loaded with presents for the baby. A Christmas, the holiday he used to shun… now brought back to life by you. Nice is a good word to describe it, but others flit through his mind as well: perfect, redeeming, salvation.
Purpose.
He takes a ragged breath, and you lean back to look at him, waiting.
"It's more than nice, sweetheart, it's... I... never thought, never dreamed this could happen in my life. You and Emmaline, you're... everything to me." He pauses, cradling your face, watching how your eyes shimmer with unshed tears. "I want," he swallows the lump in his throat. "I want you to stay. I want you to be here. Always." He needs you to stay, needs you like he needs air to breathe, needs you like he's never needed, never wanted, anything before in his life. He'd give you the world, if he could, wrap it up nicely and put it beneath the tree, but he doesn't know how to say that, how to explain.
He's grateful he doesn't have to.
"I'll be here, Simon. I'll be right here. With you." You take his hand, clutching onto him tightly. It's selfish, what he wants. Stupid. But he's not a good man... he's yours, and he'll be as wicked, as awful as he must to keep you and Emmaline safe. You're the only good thing about him now, and he'd dig himself free from a shallow grave all over again, just to crawl home to you. You've changed him, deeply. Fundamentally. Taught him the truth of love, of healing, your grief not so much different from his own, and he knows he'd die for you, he'd die for you ten thousand times.
Emmaline babbles at the sound of your voice, and you smile at her, not bothering to wipe away the tear that tracks down your cheek. "We're here. We'll stay. As long as you want us."
And christ, if that isn't the best Christmas gift he's ever be given.
#peaches writes#light on#simon riley#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#codholiday2023
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Exciting don't you think?
masterlist • ao3 • follow for more
Leon Kennedy x fem!reader
summary he is too oblivious to notice, bless his foolish heart and pretty eyes.
warnings re2 leon Kennedy, sorta open ending? fluff, mentions of murder and serial killing, short drabble :3
note my hyper fixation is alive y'all, i am not over the infinite darkness leon, but re2 leon is so sweet. sorry if it's inaccurate this is one of the rare times where i post something other than the cod fics. enjoy and ily
**
“[he] is only slain by stab after stab, and loves on till the last drop of life blood drips away”
Raccoon City, what a magnificent place to be! The soft notes of jazz filled the air, permeating your car as you gracefully cruised through the night. Darkness reigned, with a sprinkling of stars and a glowing moon casting its ethereal light upon the road. It was a wonderful night, such a night as is only possible when we are young.
Ah, speaking of youth, you spotted a youthful-looking police officer on the side of the road, gesturing for you to pull over.
Darn it.
Trouble was certainly brewing. You were well aware that the curfew had already passed, a precautionary measure implemented by the government to safeguard citizens from a recent spate of serial killings. They were secretive about the details, as always.
With a heavy sigh, you glanced in the rearview mirror. Thoughts raced through your mind as you turned off the engine, coming to a halt just as the officer approached your vehicle.
Taking a moment to double-check the weapon holstered at his side, the officer—Leon, made his way towards you. A gentle cough escaped his lips before he rested his forearm on the window, knocking lightly to signal for you to lower it.
As you complied, a sweet smile adorned your face, emitting an aura of innocence. The cold breeze crept under Leon's skin, causing him to shiver. He couldn't help but be captivated by your alluring smile and daring attire, a testament to your mischievous nature. Despite his best efforts to maintain composure, his heartbeat quickened as he mustered the courage to speak, attempting to avoid any stammering. "Your registration and identity papers, miss.."
You obliged, handing him the requested documents and, for a fleeting moment, your fingers brushed against each other. Your mischievous self reveled in his bashfulness, as his cheeks flushed, and he retreated to his patrol car to inspect your records. Meanwhile, you remained still, leaning against the window with an impish grin.
Leon returned, his voice barely above a whisper as he returned your papers. "It is past curfew, miss. May I know why you are out?"
Your smile grew wider as you locked eyes with him, finding him rather intriguing. His baby blues avoided your gaze as he fidgeted with the door. With a grin, you replied, "I was with a friend, officer. I assure you, I am a good girl."
Leon gulped, nervously rubbing his neck as the blush continued to stain his cheeks. These formalities were unfamiliar territory for him, making him all the more flustered. Softly, he whispered, a gentle smile gracing his lips as he leaned closer to the window. "Alright, miss... I mean, call me Leon."
You asked, finding the play rather too attempting not to."Tell me Leon, do you always work alone so late?"
He shook his head, feeling his insides flatter with warmth, none had really shown interst in his job before. He replied in a hushed tone still smiling.
"No, I usually don't work alone at such late hours. This is my first time."
Ah, still so young, you thought to yourself.
No, not him.
You nodded, sealing his cheek with a tender kiss. Leon blushed once again, pulling away and watching in awe as you started the car. "Take care miss!"
He called out, and you laughed, "I do enjoy a little danger, Leon."
He observed as you drove off, his heart fluttering with an unfamiliar sensation. Unfortunately, he was oblivious to the crimson stain on your shirt or the axe resting in the back seat.
The following morning, Leon couldn't believe his eyes when he saw your picture in the newspaper. The headline screamed of the capture of the notorious serial killer who had slain a cop while being stopped during the curfew.
You did that in order to silence the persistent officer who had stopped you right after Leon. Caught red-handed, the only thing on your mind was those mesmerizing baby blues... too precious, too angelic. You contented yourself with leaving a mark on his cheek and etching a core memory in his heart.
#𓆩♡𓆪 faith writes#resident evil 2#resident evil#resident evil vendetta#resident evil 6#reaident evil#resident evil fanfiction#re fanfic#re2 leon#re leon#leon kennedy vendetta#leon scott kennedy#leon s kennedy#leon kennedy#leon kennedy x reader#leon kennedy x you#leon kennedy x fem reader#leon kennedy resident evil#leon kennedy re2#leon kennedy re4#leon kennedy fluff#leon kennedy fanfic#resident evil biohazard#biohazard#re biohazard#re remake#re infinite darkness
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Neighborly shenanigans Pt. 1
Simon "Ghost" Riley x f! reader (Neighbor AU)
Part 2; Part 3; Part 4
Description: You´ve just moved in a couple of weeks ago, trying for a new start. A brief encounter with your neighbor gets your endorphins and imagination going. What is it about the mask?
Warnings: cursing, some dirty thoughts, fluff, a little pining
Word count: 1.917
A/N: Hi everyone <3 This is my very first Simon Riley x reader fic. I´ve written about several characters of CoD but Ghost was always kind of an enigma to me. I never knew how to make him the love interest. But and idea popped into my head after reading some characterization that made it much easier to write for him. So here you go :) Let me know if a part 2 is something you´d be interested in.
“Jesus fucking Christ” you swore as you tried your best to push your heavy apartment door open and balance your bag and groceries through the door. It was a struggle to say the least, but you were damned if you did second trips. Grumbling through your teeth you saw no other possibility than setting down your bag, holding the door open with your foot and grabbing your groceries a little more securely. Bending your knee, you gave your door a forceful push and slid through into your small hallway. Foregoing taking off your shoes you made your way into your open kitchen and set the heavy paper bags down on your kitchen island.
A sigh escaped you and you took a moment just to stand in your kitchen and take in the chaos around you. Half emptied moving boxes were strewn all around your living room, amidst not yet hanging shelves, plastic plants and several DIY projects. Another sigh left your lungs with a huff. Moving and starting anew had seemed like your only option a couple of weeks ago but now you dreaded the silence. You wanted this, ___, you thought. It was your decision.
Your new job was everything you ever hoped for, and training turned out to be smooth sailing. You loved it, you loved your apartment, even though it was far from being finished yet. But still, what you´d left behind still lingered in the back of your brain all too clearly at times. Especially when your heavy door closed behind you every evening and there was nothing but you, your DIY projects, an occasional phone call with your parents and then silence. Silence to wallow in, rake your brain and memories. Memories not even a good Podcast or music were able to drown out.
You weren´t as close with your colleagues yet as to be invited out to the pub after work but that was to be expected. The chances were good though. Maybe just a couple of days more and you´d have at least some kind of social interaction. One step after the other, you reminded yourself. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Your own impatience with yourself was yet again trying to make you feel like you´d made a mistake by moving. A humorless laugh bubbled from your lips as you shook your head. Calm down, you thought. This is your life, your pace. Relax.
A couple of minutes later your food was stored away, veggies and salmon steaming away and finally you sat down on your couch, glass of wine in hand and Netflix on your TV.
“Bloody hell” you cursed as a shot of adrenalin set your brain into overdrive. Your bag. You jumped off your couch and hurried over to the door. Swinging it open with a yank you initially thought someone had put out the lights in the corridor. All you saw was black and not a second later you collided with something solid.
Shaking your head, you realized three things. It was 7 o´clock on a warm day in July, so it couldn’t be dark out already. Your hallway had several windows and yes, the sun was still out. The black wall you just ran into turned out to be a massive chest.
Heat was ascending your neck as you took a small step back and lifted your head to look at the face this quite impressive physique belonged to. What the…?
Before you stood a man, several inches taller than you, frozen in place with his arm lifted as if he was just about to knock on your door. He looked down on you with impressive, hazel eyes. Honey blond, tousled hair adorned his head, falling slightly onto his forehead, wet tips clinging to his temples and a bead of sweat disappearing behind his ear. But that was about all you could make out.
Seeing people wearing a facemask had of course not been an unusual sight for the last three years but he wasn´t wearing one of those surgical ones. His nose, mouth and chin were covered in thick, black material, even spanning over his cheekbones and disappearing behind his ears. When your eyes caught his again you saw them narrowing just slightly and one blond eyebrow ticking upwards.
Something wriggly moved inside your belly.
The man slowly lowered his arm, simultaneously lifting the other slightly, holding out your bag.
“This yours?” a deep, calm voice broke through the silence and the wriggly something inside you spread out towards your chest, down your arms and into your fingertips. You swallowed, trying to gather your wits again.
“Uhm…yes. Yes, that´s mine. Forgot about it” you said with a nervous laugh as you took it from him. He hummed deep inside his chest in understanding. The sound only letting your eyes snap onto his again trying to decipher if the squinting was an annoyed one or an amused one.
Amused, as it turns out. He took a deep breath, the black material of his running shirt as you now realized it was, stretching across the expanse of his chest.
“You know, that´s how you get your identity stolen. Or at least your wallet.” Yeah, there was no question now, he was grinning behind his mask, his tone mildly rebuking but not at all belittling.
A small smirk of your own crawled onto your lips as you cocked out your hip and nodded your head.
“You´re absolutely right, Sir. I´ll cuff my bag to my wrist from now on so this inconvenience shall not occur to you a second time.” You want to be cocky, mister? Fine with me.
Your answer made him chuckle. It was short but genuine. One hand in his pocket he stepped back slightly and only now did you notice the heat that his body had emitted. With one last narrow of his eyes, making the edges crinkle ever so slightly he answered. “Not an inconvenience, Miss. Have a good evening.” He nodded once and walked away to your right.
“Y-you too” you cursed the way your words tumbled. To your surprise he halted in front of the door next to yours and your heart jumped into your throat as he took out his keys. Your eyes still fixed onto his side profile (you still couldn’t really make out any features), he gave you one last look before opening his door.
“And thank you” you rushed out.
He only lifted one hand to give you a small little wave that seemed way too juvenile for a man of his stature and closed his door.
Kind of shellshocked you turned around yourself and let your door fall shut behind you. Clutching onto your bag you didn’t even notice how long you were just standing in your hallway, trying to sort out the wriggling nerves. Who was that? Idiot. Your neighbor. Your neighbor that you´d never seen before. A man like him you´d remember seeing. There´d never been any noise from the apartment next to yours so you just thought it was either a very quiet tenant or one that only went there to sleep.
Sitting down on your couch again you stared at the wall behind your TV. He was behind that wall, doing…things. Existing. Why did that feel so exciting to you? Maybe it was just because that´d been your first real social interaction apart from talking to your colleagues?
Laughing incredulously at yourself you buried your burning face in your hands and giggled. No. No that wasn’t it and you knew it. It was stupid. So very stupid and weird and nerdy and…that damn mask!!
“Whhhyyyy…..?” you moaned grinning and rubbed your temples, finally letting all the pent up adrenalin and endorphins rush through your blood stream unstopped. What was it about men wearing those damn masks? Not being able to fully see their face. Having to find out what there was to them by just their actions.
The fist time you really thought you´d lost your mind was when you actually developed a burning crush on a literal tin can from the Star Wars universe. Oh yeah, sure. Give me a brooding, sarcastic, overworked loner with PTSD and give him a freaking child to protect. Watch him become a devoted, loving single parent. Of course! Yes, let me thirst after him. And did it stop there? Of course not. The pandemic hit and the lockdown had everyone in a chokehold.
The only chokehold you wanted to be in at the time however was one carried out by a video game character called Ghoul from “Call of Obligation”. Tatted up, burly, sharp, dutiful, loyal and fucking hot.
The only thing you were able to see of him? His eyes. Just his eyes and an occasional forearm here and there. Everything else covered in tactical gear and a scary facemask. God that character haunted your dreams almost every night. And now, you had his existing, breathing, heat emitting, real human equivalent living next to you. You felt your insides burn as another funny noise came from your mouth. There had to be something wrong with you. Why was half a visible face or even less, so damn attractive to you?
“Shit must be some kind of kink” you murmured to yourself as you reached for your wine glass.
Why was he wearing that mask anyway? People weren´t obligated to wear one anymore. Was it some kind of training technique while running?
Anyhow, you appreciated the encounter. Your mood instantly better even though the both of you hadn’t talked much at all. He seemed witty. Cocky almost and you liked that.
Emptying your wine, you put the glass back in the dishwasher and walked over to your bathroom when you heard it. The shower in the next apartment was running. Immediately you halted all movement and tried to not even breath. The situation seemed so delicate, like thin glass ready to break. You stared at the wall when something else caught your ears.
No. Did you hear this right? Was he…?
You walked carefully over to your shower and stepped in. Trying not to care about how crazy you must look at this moment, you turned your head to the wall slightly, closed your eyes and listened as hard as you could. There it was.
Low, melodic and absolutely captivating. Over the sound of the water hitting the tile you heard your neighbor singing. Your forehead hit the tile and you breathed as quietly as possible, marveling in the baritone sweetness that could be heard through the wall. All too soon, about a minute later it was over. The water was shut off, the singing stopped.
As if in trance you got your nighttime routine going and a couple minutes later, slid into bed. Knowing where his bathroom was now, you were positive that his bedroom had to be next to yours as well. You tried to hear more, but nothing else penetrated the walls. It made you glad actually. If you would be able to hear him in his bedroom, sleep would turn out to be an impossibility to achieve.
This way, you closed your eyes, got comfortable and let your thoughts drift and wander. Not long after, you were dead asleep. Your dreams yet again haunted, but now, the usual scary mask of Ghoul was replaced with a solid black one and instead of clawing at a fully clothed head between your legs, your fingers tangled into soft honey blond curls.
_____________________________________________________
I hope you enjoyed and thank you for reading. Please consider interacting with this post and give me some feedback. Comments and reblogs always help not only to push my work that I love, but also help to improve my writing and get my imagination going.
Thank you for considering it <3
#ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#simon ghost x reader#ghost x you#simon riley x you#simon ghost riley x reader#x reader#cod men#cod fic#cod x reader#x you#cod mwii#x you fluff#eventual smut#simon riley smut#simon riley imagine#simon riley fic#ghost fic#ghost fanfiction#ghost x reader fic#neighbor au#strangers to lovers
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Price x Reader - Training and Punishment
Pairing(s): John Price x Reader Warnings: NSFW, blowjob, face-fucking, authority imbalance, choking, Y/N is used once, light dom/sub, reader is short and a bit of a brat, also not so subtle ghost/soap if you squint Wordcount: 6.4k Summary: Captain Price is a man that prides himself on his strong sense of justice and sensibility - so he knows that stupid feelings for his inferiors are the last thing he should be having. Yet thoughts of a new Second Lieutenant plague his mind after an off-hand comment, and when he sees the opportunity for an intimate scolding, he quickly finds it incredibly hard to walk the line between his desires and maintaining professionalism. AO3 Link: Right here! <3
A/N: I've been meaning to post this on Tumblr for a while, but I've been holding onto it so I can post it when I'm struggling to write/upload - aka right now :p
This was the first COD fanfic I ever wrote and uploaded, and I think it's one of my most popular so I'm proud lol
Full fic is under the cut <3
John Price is a good man.
At least, he thinks that he is for the kind of man that the world has made Price to be.
But lately, devilish temptation has been weighing on his shoulders in an unfamiliar way.
"Good morning, Captain."
Your eyes glance over him in a flash that he hopes he doesn’t imagine as you settle in your chair. Price doesn't care for formal seating positions in these meetings, but as you take your seat just two across from his, he can't tell whether he appreciates that decision or not.
The scent of your shampoo and fresh soap tickles his nose and he takes a sharp breath in, lustful images flooding into his mind like they were just waiting for an excuse. But like the hardened, controlled man Price tells himself that he is, he's shaking away the thoughts before they can go any further.
"Good morning, Second Lieutenant."
For a second he isn't sure whether you appreciated his reflection of rank in his greeting, but as he sees the corners of your lips quirk, a delighted warmth builds in his stomach. Before he can find anything else to say, Ghost pushes through the doorway, nodding at Price. Price doesn't even have to raise an eyebrow before Ghost speaks gruffly. "Takin' a piss. Said he'd be quick."
The large man seats himself at the opposite side of the round table and to anyone else it would seem like a calculated move to make distance, but as you pour over your morning notes, Price notices how Ghost shifts his foot to push the chair next to him out in expectation.
The files are still warm in his folder as Price opens it, spreading out training schedules, operation plans, tactical maps and other notes to go over. Ghost's absence of a folder is displeasing to Price, but equally unsurprising. As he shifts through the folder and passes two pieces of paper to Ghost, he's grateful that at least Ghost gets his paperwork done, compared to another one of his Lieutenants.
Like that Lieutenant was summoned by Price's thought, Soap can be heard from the corridor before he even enters the room, trailing behind Gaz as he babbles about something. His demeanour is too bright for such an early morning start, but at least he looks much more awake than Gaz, who is nursing a steaming cup of coffee between his hands, strong enough for Price to smell immediately.
"Mornin' Cap'!"
"Captain."
Soap takes the pushed-out seat next to Ghost, and as Gaz follows suit, Price is relieved to see they've managed to bring their folders; despite how he cringes at the torn, dog-eared edges. Ghost hands Soap the second paper as Price slides another to Gaz across the table.
Two other second lieutenants make their way through the door. They move to sit next to you, finding companionship amongst the shared rank, though Price notices one falter as they observe your proximity to him. It was a brazen move to seat yourself so close to the captain. He likes your boldness, respectful but confident. As a couple others filter in and take their seats, Price begins the meeting. It's a standard monthly meeting, something Price has done so many times he doesn't even need to think, but today he feels nervous. It would make him a poor excuse for a captain if he let it slip him up, so he powers through the unrest in his stomach each time his eyes catch yours.
He tries to keep his eyes off you during the meeting, tearing his eyes away each time he glances at you. When you stand to speak, he almost feels relieved to have a reason to look at you while you address the table. Price doesn't know why he finds himself so distracted by you during the meeting, or why he wants there to be something behind the way your eyes linger on him.
When he dismisses the meeting, his shoulders release a tension he didn't know he was holding. Another effect of your presence, he thinks, and this realisation sparks something impulsive within him. He watches as everyone moves to the door, eyeing you lagging behind as you shuffle your notes, a pace behind your companions.
"(Y/N)."
Your name is out of his mouth before he realises it and you pause in your step, turning to look at him. "I..." Price falters, wracking his brain for something. "You spoke well in the meeting." He nods stiffly and manages a smile, kicking himself for speaking in the first place.
"- no way the Lieutenant worked for it; I'm telling you the bitch sucked someone off."
Confusion furrows your brow for a moment, but you look pleased as you smile, nodding back in thanks as you continue out the door. Price sinks back down into his chair, pulling a cigar and lighter from a pocket on his pants and sparking it. Off the field, he tries to limit himself to just a morning and afternoon smoke – not that he’s happy about it. He takes a long, slow drag as he eyes the "no smoking indoors" sign, neatly paired with the smoke detector that seems to be blinking at him disapprovingly. Next to fucking his inferior officer so hard they couldn't walk for days, smoking indoors seemed like a minor rule to break.
----------
It had started weeks ago, after a bitter comment he half-heard from some rookies in the common room after an exhausting session, designed during the previous monthly meeting and run under your command.
Their backs were turned to Price as they sat at the table, unaware he stood a distance behind them – seeing the captain occupying such spaces was rare, his work keeping him cooped in his office, and it was only checking the supplies that needed to be replenished that had brought him here.
"The Captain is too old to fuck with her, I'd bet Lieutenant McTavish. She serves under him anyway, yeah?"
The other rookie scoffed. "I bet she serves under him alright."
Price decided he’d heard enough and cleared his throat, turning around and stepping over. The soldiers bolted up, standing to attention.
There was no need for you to hear this, he mused, especially when he could handle it himself.
"Finished with training, boys?" They respond with a “yes sir” in unison, and Price saw the hope in their eyes that he missed their conversation.
"Not if you have breath to talk like that. Do it again, whole thing."
A cruel punishment when an office discussion would have served, motivated by the flush of anger he felt in the moment at the suggestion his officers would be so easily corrupted. But as he laid in bed that night, their words echoed through his mind. Sleeping with you? He could genuinely say he had never thought of that before; the battlefield keeps his mind hostage, no space for fleeting fantasies. He was a good captain and respected his inferiors, perhaps beyond what other captains would deem as wise. He wasn't going to fantasise about you because you were a human with breasts and a vagina.
But then he thinks about your first meeting with the team, remembers shaking your hand, the firm grip warming his palm as you beamed at him. Your hands were soft in his, barely weathered despite your time in the field. Soap was delighted at being the only Lieutenant assigned a Second Lieutenant that had to be transferred in, despite Price's insistence that it was a purely random decision to implement someone trained in new combat drills. You were equally as smile-y as the Scot behind you, and Price thought if your smile was any brighter it would hurt his eyes.
Your hands and that beautiful mouth. He wonders if all of you is soft, how your work has left you scarred, what else is hidden underneath that tight-fitting uniform and heavy gear. How it would feel to run his hand up your arm, pull him against you under the sheets, his fingers wet with your spit as your tongue runs over them, keeping those pretty eyes locked with his as he’s pushing right up against there –
He shoves his face against the pillow until his lungs ache for oxygen, only pulling back for a gulp of air when he feels the burning in his lower stomach dissipate. These were just silly thoughts the rookies planted in his mind, and his tired brain indulging in primal nonsense. There was nothing deeper, certainly nothing regarding you. You were a good recruit and he liked that; he’s just looking out for you, right?
I would’ve reprimanded any junior talking about their lieutenant that way – nothing more.
For a second he falters, dragging his step as his brain works to compute the next best option; does he wave? Pretend he doesn’t see you, lost in thought? Smile and hope you don’t want to stop for a conversation, busy with work?
A small spark of rage reignites within him as he thinks of the comments, rolling himself onto his side with a huff. And as he falls asleep, the captain tried to ignore the quiet voice asking him whether he feels angry at the idea of his Lieutenants being tempted, or if it was the temptation being you.
----------
The next time he bumps into you is the evening a few days after the meeting, when dinner has finished, and most are retiring to their rooms. There's an unmanageable amount of folders in your arms as you hurry down the halls.
“Lose another bet with Soap?”
It wasn't that he was hoping to avoid you, but your presence makes him feel stupid, unassertive as he fumbles uncharacteristically through sentences. The next morning after his encounter with the rookies, he burnt himself pouring water into his mug when you walked in, and soon Price realised he stumbled every time he noticed your presence. The latest meeting affirmed what Price had been trying to deny; not only did you stir something within him, the times you look at him make him hope you feel something back.
Your eyes automatically flicker to him as each footstep brings you closer, a smile growing on your face when you recognise him, accompanied by a respectful nod. He could just nod back and keep on walking. Yet despite all his hesitancy, he finds himself to be the first one opening his mouth.
You let out a laugh this time, better than the small smile he got before and after the meeting. He can’t help the way that a smile tugs at his lips from just hearing the melody. The papers rustle as you readjust your slipping grip to stop and talk, and he prays that you don’t notice his lingering look at the way the folders pressed against your chest.
“Let me help you, soldier.”
From the apprehension that flashes across your face, he can predict your rejection before it leaves your mouth, cutting you off.
“You think a captain doesn’t do paperwork too? C’mon. You’ll save me from doing more when you drop those folders and lose something important; missing file reports are a bloody bastard to get done.”
To his relief, the smile returns and blooms into a grin.
“When you put it that way sir, I can’t refuse.”
You struggle to keep everything organised as you separate the piles, and Price instinctively swoops his arms underneath yours to catch any strays that might fall. The move pulls him closer to you, and he hates how he can feel his heart beating faster in his chest. Mumbling a thanks, you manage to divide the stack and hold out a half. Price grabs them, ignoring the way his fingers brush over yours as they hold the stack steady. The pile he takes is heavier than it looks, and he’s surprised you were carrying double the weight without more strain. They’re warm from your grip and he ignores the terribly childish thought about how this is some kind of indirect hug.
“Gettin’ in some extra weight training lugging this around, son. Got a strong set of arms on you.”
He needs to stop complimenting you during every goddamn interaction.
“Thank you sir, guess it’s assurance our training works well. It’s just to my office; you won’t have to carry them for long.”
He hums in approval, letting silence fall between you as he keeps a slow pace, listening to your footsteps fall in tandem. The hallways are empty, and a selfish part of him hopes they stay that way as he basks in your presence.
“It wasn’t a bet, by the way.”
“Sorry?”
“The paperwork, sir, it wasn’t a bet. It was actually really funny – we had some time to kill after training, and Lieutenant Riley and Lieutenant McTavish thought they would try and give me some lessons on hand-to-hand combat.”
“Based on your evaluation feedback, eh? Good lad, working for improvement.”
His approval seems to bring a warm flush to your cheeks that he can just catch in the poor barrack lighting, and suddenly he’s not sure he wants to stop complimenting you.
“Yes sir, thank you sir. L.T. McTavish promised me some lessons and it was convenient that Lieutenant Riley was there too.”
“What was so funny about training, then?”
He can see the door to your office come into view as you turn the corner, and his weary arms feel a little grateful it isn’t much further.
“Oh, it wasn’t the training, sir! They decided to show me some basic combat, and when we’d played around with that, we got to using prop guns as close combat weapons. After a while they started using the guns as weapons to fight each other, and then – “
Price frowns as you cut yourself off sharply, falling silent as the smile drops from your face. He raises a thick eyebrow at the break in speech, but your eyes are suddenly glued to your destination of the door with a feverish interest.
“And then?”
There’s a hesitant quiet before you respond, and Price thinks he can almost hear the gears in your brain turning.
“Lieutenant McTavish… thought it was not a good idea. Because it was irresponsible and could break the decoys or hurt someone.”
If the pause wasn’t suspicious enough, the (rather specific) answer most certainly was. Lieutenant McTavish? Thinking something is a bad idea? You come to a halt at the door, and he stops in turn, watching you.
“And that was funny?”
“Uh… Yes, sir.”
The door swings open as you turn the knob, stepping in and letting the folders fall on the desk with a sigh of relief. Price follows suit, letting the door fall closed behind him as he places his folders neatly next to the pile on the table before turning to you, crossing his arms and resting his hip against the desks’ edge. You stand next to him in front of the desk, eyes flickering between his intimidatingly relaxed stature and the closed door. Instinctively assessing the room and its exit points. Like prey.
“Can’t imagine McTavish would suddenly find such sensibility in the middle of fuckin’ around.”
The way your eyes look anywhere but his face would be amusing if he wasn’t slightly concerned about the state of his Lieutenants and the training equipment. Though, he assumes since Soap and Ghost thought they could get away with it by using you as their little lackey, nothing serious enough had happened to warrant any immediate action; he would confirm with his lieutenants later though, knowing their irritating tendency to shrug off anything but life-threatening injuries.
“You had to…” He watches you swallow as your eyes finally meet his. “You had to be there to get it, just... Funny in the moment kind of thing.”
“Right, right, ‘course. So, if I was to look through these folders…” He picks up one sitting on top just to make a point, watching your reaction. “… This extra paperwork wouldn’t happen to be accident report and equipment replacement forms, eh?”
Nothing comes from your lips as you part them to speak, and you settle for a nervous shake of your head. He notices the flexing of your arms as they rest behind your back, at an informal stance of attention; fiddling with your hands, he suspects, and the way he’s making you nervous sends a rush to his head. You were never arrogant in your responses, but sure and steady, and the sudden change in your demeanour was thrilling to him. Lying to others clearly escaped your many capabilities, and although he could just bust you right now, he doesn’t.
“And if I went to the infirmary logs, I wouldn’t find a muppet or two listed as treated at some point today? All prop guns will be neatly organised in their respective storage spots?”
There’s a pleading in your eyes as they meet his again, and Price knows he should stop tormenting you with this game. That this game is leading his mind to a dangerous place, and he doesn’t know how long he can maintain the boundaries of professionalism as you tremble in front of him. But he won’t be the first one to break, and something inside him can’t but enjoy the interaction, egging him on – so he lets you suffer before applying more pressure.
“You were asked a question, soldier.”
“Sir?”
He watches you flounder for a few more seconds, stuttering and stumbling over the excuses racing through your mind. “I-I think I should start my work sir, thank you for helping me carry-“
As you reach out to take a folder from the top of the pile, he uncrosses his arms and moves in a flash to capture your hand against its surface, pinning it there.
The silence is almost ringing in his ears as he takes a moment to watch you, caught into leaning closer towards him. If Price took not even a step closer, he’d be towering over you; any further and he could feel you pressed up against him.
“I think there’s something you’re not telling me. S’important to keep the Captain informed.”
Every muscle screams at him to give in, to pounce on you. To satisfy the urge to move he slides his arm between you to put the folder back on the table. He lets it fall from his grip before he forces it back to his side, goosebumps prickling where his arm brushes against your shirt. He doesn’t know what miracle is keeping his self-control hanging by a thread, but he’s listlessly thanking every lesson in self-restraint and patience he’s had. He can’t keep the gruffness out of his voice, scratchy as it rumbles out of him.
“Not bein’ entirely honest.”
His eyes flicker down to your lips, and the stutter in your breath tells him that he wasn’t as inconspicuous as he hoped. But you don’t pull away and your hand stays under his, warm, the shaking lulled beneath his steadying hand.
“Sir…”
He takes the step closer, keeping his hand atop of yours. You need to look up to keep eye contact with the captain, and he knows that this is the last time he’s ever going to get to be this intimate with you. Even as they rush by faster than he can keep up with, one stream of thought is loudest: he can’t be doing this. Price had seen this path before, dismissed soldiers from service who had followed it. Even if he did resign to the idea he liked you, it couldn’t go anywhere. Two soldiers couldn’t fraternise, let alone an inferior and their captain.
And it wouldn’t even matter; you were going to pull away. He was making you nervous, wishfully interpreting your fear as desire. Classic fuckin’ projection. This was going too far; a creepy, old officer taking advantage of a good, young soldier. He can’t make himself move, can’t retract his hand from yours, and he knows it’s a matter of time before you do it for him. He breathes in your scent, surprised he can even inhale and waits for you to move, wishing the moment wouldn’t end.
The world doesn’t feel real when you make the first, most unexpected move. You close the gap, body finally against his, and he knows that this is all a dream when your lips connect. But the way your hand cups his cheeks, rubs against the bristle of his beard feels so real, and the shock begins to subside as he kisses back tenderly, afraid the move will shatter whatever illusion he’s experiencing.
His heart wrenches as you’re pulling back too soon, missing your skin against his lips and cheek, but looking at your expression immediately tells him why. Something almost like shame stirs when he realises he’s been paying enough attention to you that reading your thoughts has become easier, but it’s not a challenge when they’re just an echo of his own; we shouldn’t do this, I shouldn’t have done that, we need to stop right now. But Price’s thread of self-control has snapped – it snapped the moment your lips met his – and he doesn’t care about regret or reservations anymore.
There’s only one thing that’s stopping him. He wants to be sure you want this, wants to know this isn’t a mistake.
“I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t–“
“Will y’do it again?”
The question makes you look as stunned as he feels by the kiss, and the playing field suddenly feels a lot more level. Confidence surges back into him, and as words escape you once more, he has a better idea.
“Just tell me to stop.”
His empty hand snakes to your waist and pulls you back into him, letting you rest for a few moments as he waits for rejection. Nothing but a small huff escapes you at the collision, and Price has never moved faster in his life. When your lips meet again, he kisses you like every second breathing is a waste of time; passionate, breathless and hungry. Finally unpinning your hand from the folder, he moves it against his chest. It spurs you to life, fisting the material in a tight grip as your other hand makes itself home in his hair. Price feels himself twitch in anticipation for the moment that it’s guiding him between your legs, and the jolt keeps him grounded. He needs to take it slow, give you enough time to stop. This was already taking too much in his mind, and he was only stealing as much as you would give him. But the way you kiss him back is almost bruising, and the grip on his shirt wouldn’t let him step back if he tried. He breaks the kiss to press his mouth into your neck, and the way you whimper rips a groan from somewhere deep. It takes effort that makes his body hurt to not bite down as he leaves a trail of kisses, finding a place on your collarbone to suck at, until there’s the smallest mark fluorescing against your skin.
Straightening up lets him take a good look at you, flushed and out of breath from his ministrations. He wishes that he’d done this sooner, and an overwhelming urge to make up for lost time hits him so hard that he feels lightheaded. It’s delightfully easy for the captain to man-handle you, spinning you against the desk and nudging your thighs apart with a careful but firm knee. The hand that was in his hair clutches his shoulder for support, and he keeps his hand steady on your waist. But his knee doesn’t press up yet, keeping his distance.
“Y’know what happens to inferiors when they disobey their superiors, don’t you?”
The way your pupils dilate is exhilarating and he feels him twitch again, slowly pressing against the tightness of his pants. Whatever doubt that’s rooted in his brain is drowning underneath the hunger for you, but he refuses to take chances. He can feel the need rising in his stomach, and the fiendish desires that come with it. He wants you to know what you’re getting into – and maybe a small part of him is still in denial, craving reassurance. One last chance to back out.
“They get punished.”
Anything; the grip on his shirt slacking, a twitch backwards, a crease in your brow. But you just peer up at him with anticipation, unswayed by his conviction, jaw slightly agape as he watches the words sink in. He takes his hand from his chest where it encapsulates yours, bringing it to meld against the plush of your cheek, and the way your bottom lip catches under the thumb tracing it has his mind set on what’s coming next. You kiss the pad of his thumb, and as a small hiss slips from him, something sparkles in your eyes.
“Punished? I’m just doing paperwork, like I’m told, sir.”
Then he feels it; the roll of your hips, barely enough to brush your crotch against his thigh. His grip on your waist stiffens as he tries not to tremble. Your breath catches in your throat at the pressure, and he hopes it frightens you. So unaware of what he wants to do to you.
“Doing like you’re told?”
A stray piece of hair brushes against his hand and he pushes it behind your ear, meticulously using the move to drag his fingers down your neck until he can extend his digits, fitting your neck into the crook of his hand. Feeling you swallow underneath his grip is pushing him, and the way he throbs against the seam of his pants is fighting his urge to drag this moment out until he can commit it to memory.
“Funny. I didn’t tell your hips to move. Didn’t tell you to give me cheek.”
With his hand around your throat, you still give him that bratty attitude.
“Part of the service sir, free of charge.”
He has no question that you want this, the reality has sunk in, and it’s only a matter of how fast he can get you on your knees.
“Second Lieutenant, I think you’ve forgotten how this works.”
A gasp breaks from you as he tightens his grip, just enough to make breathing difficult.
“I think you… need another lesson. Y’need a reminder of what your mouth is for, how you should be usin’ it. As Captain of this platoon, it’s my duty to reinforce punishment for misbehaviours.”
“You report to my Lieutenants. My Lieutenants report to me. I am your Captain. You report to me, with honesty.”
Price squeezes harder, completely restricting your airway, watching as your face reddens.
The hand around your throat falls to his side, and he lets go of your waist to pull your hand from his shirt, the fabric wrinkled and creased. It pains him to vacate his leg from the warm, plush thighs around it as he takes a step back, but he’s well aware that it’s going to be worth it.
“On your knees, solider.”
Without a word you push off the desk, sliding down the sturdy wood of the desk and to your knees, right at his feet. The lack of resilience is intoxicating, wrapping around his lungs and squeezing the air out of them. Without waiting, your hands are running up his thighs but before they can get to his zipper, he snatches them into a tight grip to press against your head.
“I don’t think so. No hands.”
The stare he fixes you is stern enough to keep you in place as he unzips his pants, just slightly tugging them down. His fingers slip further to his pocket, pulling out a cigar to hang in his teeth and an accompanying matchbox. A lifetime of smoking has the move perfected, and he doesn’t even need to watch, keeping his eyes locked with yours as he strikes the match and burns the cigar butt with a slow, deep inhale. Anticipation is doing his job teasing you, and he can see your thighs squeezing together; good, wearing yourself out for him. When you squirm on your heels, he exhales a plume of smoke, dropping the matchbox on the desk.
“See? Wasn’t that hard t’listen.”
The conflict in your mind is apparent; take the degradation or not. Heat rushes through his stomach at the way your jaw clenches, biting back whatever retort was on your tongue, and he thinks the attitude adjustment deserves a reward.
“Good pet, keepin’ your mouth closed. Maybe you won’t be too hard to teach.”
Price takes another long drag, taking the cigar between his fingers.
“Hands behind your back. Get started.”
“Of course, sir.”
He tries to open his mouth to reprimand your snark but instead a growl tears through him as your cheek rubs over the damp material at his tip, leaving it sticky and glistening when you pull back.
You don’t let him catch a breath, delicately grasping the band of his underwear between your teeth to begin tugging them down. The grip on his cigar is precarious and another drag steadies it as you pull down far enough for his cock to fall free, already tacky and wet from being pressed against him.
“Everythin’ out love, not just my cock.”
The small noises of surprise are muffled as he pushes your face into the shaft, an upwards roll of his hips pressing his balls against your lips. It’s almost pornographic as each thrust of his hips drags his aching cock across your face, leaving your skin shimmering with trails of pre-cum. Your cheeks are soft and pliant as they smush against his cock, and the hot rush of air and wetness of your spit each time his cock glides over your lips is almost unbearable. A needy moan vibrates against his cock, the sensation eliciting one of his own. The idea of cumming from just rubbing against someone’s face sounds ludicrous, but as his muscles tense, he needs to pull away before he splatters across your pretty face and gasping lips. Your hair falls from his grasp as he clutches your jaw, gripping it with enough force to hurt, tilting your gaze towards his.
Teeth graze against his skin as you nip the band again and he hisses, fixing you with a stern glare. But the way his dick jumps at the pain betrays him, so he settles for another long drag, watching as you finally accomplish your goal. You let go of the band with a snap, the tight pressure of the elastic under his sack making his shaft throb; on purpose, he suspects.
You sit back on your heels and take it in, almost admiring your work. He loves the way you look at him, studying his twitching and weeping cock, but Price wants to be in control of this moment. A hand tangles in your hair to attain a dominant grip, tugging your head to stay still exactly where he wants it.
“Gonna tell me what my Lieutenants did?“
“They were…”
Satisfaction bubbles in his stomach as you look up at him, sticky, flushed and messy while you lick your lips. He wants you to give in, admit defeat and let him reward you.
“They gave me a close combat lesson and then cleaned down the room, sir.”
It’s so quiet he can hear each breath you take as the satisfaction is replaced with a fiery determination. He doesn’t react or respond, just watches as your eyes dart around his face, trying to gauge some level of reaction. Nothing gives as he rights himself up, dropping your jaw from his grip. The spark of his cigar is dying out, and the last embers glow as he takes a final puff.
“Y’had more than a fair chance, soldier.”
The cigar crunches as he fully extinguishes the expired butt on the desk, letting it fall with a thunk. With both hands free, he tenderly gathers your hair into a bunch, before yanking it back and pinning it against the desks’ surface. The back of your head hits the edge, and he’s satisfied at the yelp and indignant frown it draws from you.
“I’m gonna fuck this mouth ‘til you remember how to be a good soldier. At least work out the fuckin’ stress y’cause me.”
Keeping one hand to trap you against the desk, he wraps the other around his shaft. Spit gathers on his tongue before he opens his mouth, letting it fall down and splat onto his member, making a sticky noise as he rubs it along the length.
“Open up.”
You part your lips, hanging out your tongue and he can’t stop his eyes from rolling back when his cock finally enters your mouth. He knows this isn’t going to last long; Price is a man of drive over energy, stamina ebbing and flowing that’s compensated for by his meticulous touches, manipulative and focused on drawing out every pleasurable sensation he can create whether it’s with his cock or another tool. But in your office, after hours and pressed up against a desk isn’t the right place to bring you apart underneath him, and he has to settle with leaving you a taste only he can satiate.
The way you can’t do anything but let the captain work his hips is erotic, brows crinkled in desperation, eyes wet and pleading, helpless to do anything but speed up the process. It's a miracle he remembers how to speak as shallow jerks massage pre-cum across your tastebuds. In the same moment, he can feel your tongue press against him and his hips stutter.
“Bloody hell, darlin’. Use that fuckin’ tongue.”
Price thrusts further into your mouth, working his way in. You try to swallow around him, spit dribbling from your lips as you do your best to manage the intrusion, and he grunts at the suction it causes.
“Needy little love, eh?”
Another moan vibrates his cock stronger than before, and an animalistic growl is the last thing you hear before he forces the full length in. The way your throat tightens as you gag has his knees weak, and when his balls are flush with your chin, he takes a moment to regain his breath. A slick noise catches his attention, and he realises a hand is between your thighs, slipped under your panties and working away. He’s too close to draw the punishment out any longer, ignoring your absence of permission, and the fact that you’re getting off to being face-fucked is enough to reinvigorate the man.
“Can’t lie for shit, hm? Your body can’t either, just fuckin’ look at that. Playin’ with yourself as I use you.”
Every noise you make courses through him like electricity, and the degradation has you humming and whimpering. Picking up the pace again, lewd, watery plaps fill the air as he fucks your throat. Fluids trickle down his balls, droplets splashing onto your clothed chest with each slap against your chin. The deeper thrusts keep you gagging, stimulating tears that fall down your face, running the military-permitted mascara in black streaks as your eyes squeeze closed. The way you’re falling to pieces underneath him is exhilarating, better than any wet dream or weak fantasy he’s been entertaining himself with. His thrusts grow more erratic, both hands gripping the edge of the table.
“Look at me. Fucking – Look at me.”
Tears drip down your cheeks, nose buried against his pelvis as he feels your throat convulse around him. You blink rapidly up at him, trying to clear your eyes to meet his.
“Watch me while I fill your fuckin’ throat.”
When the words leave his lips, he can see your hand working faster and he feels heat rushing to his loins, thrilled at the idea of coming with you. He picks up the pace, each rough movement driving your head against the wood, and a faint voice in the back of his mind notes to grab Panadol after. The peak of his climax rapidly builds as praise falls from him between pants, telling you how "fuckin’ good" you look taking every bit of his cock.
As he throws his head back, a hand wrapping in your hair and driving his cock the deepest it can go, he prays the walls are thick enough to muffle the depraved grunts and groans he makes while emptying his balls. He feels your body spasm as your own orgasm rushes through you, the high-pitched vocalisations ringing around him as your hips gyrate into your palm and the other clutches at his pant leg. The adrenaline is rushing through him, feeling lightheaded but finally satiated. A hand unclenches from the desk and the other releases your hair, massaging your scalp almost apologetically. When he feels himself soften, he resigns to slowly pulling out, wishing he didn’t have to break the intimate connection. The cum you can’t swallow spills, leaking out and slowly seeping down your neck, onto your chest and shirt.
You look beautiful, face covered in liquids, dishevelled, and still recuperating from your orgasm. Affection overwhelms him and he crouches down, hooking his arms under yours to pull you up from your kneeling position, and sitting onto the desk. A small noise of discomfort makes him feel guilty and Price pushes between your thighs, tentatively pulling you closer into him as a hand rests against your back. The other covers your knee, his thumb rubbing soothing circles into the pressure marks. He feels relieved when you melt into him, wrapping your arms around his waist and pressing your head to his chest. The room is peaceful, heavy with the scent of sweat and sex, and he rests his chin against the top of your head. Although logic returns to him and rationality begins compiling the consequences of his disobedience, he can’t find himself to care, breathing in that same shampoo smell. He hopes next time – will there be a next time? – he can shower with you, surrounded by your scent. As he loses himself to thoughts of possibilities, a small voice breaks him away.
“It was only a decoy pistol, sir.”
It takes a moment to comprehend what you mean, but the realisation snatches a snort from him.
“... And two SA80s.”
Suddenly, the situation is a little less funny, but he settles on the idea it could have been worse.
“… They ripped a mat open and Ghost had a concussion.”
Of course. He closes his eyes, mentally cursing the two idiots and the additional work they’ve added to his already bursting schedule. But he feels your shoulders shake with laughter, and he can’t keep a smile from his own face. While he’d never tell the two men, they could’ve burnt down the barracks and Price wouldn’t care; as long as it led to right here, with you in his arms.
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