#and the concept of him actually being able to be an academic with peers equal to him

[fatedroses]

Short comic for adventurer zenos, and the hand he lends to the students of baldesion in exchange for some lodging- which quickly turns into him actually learning to enjoy his time and the company there. Which, in this once he’s able to actually get back into researching more of his interests he occasionally goes overboard on his work which leads to him forgetting to eat or sleep before it is done.

[th3atr3phant0m]

A Different Kinf of Love

Zim, like most other children his age, had moments where he was absolutely certain that he was different from everyone else that he knew, and, to be honest, there wasn’t much anyone could say that would convince him. Statistically speaking, most people didn’t have two dads, most people weren’t best friends with the same person who they did everything in their power to sabotage, and, most importantly, most people couldn’t say that they had accidentally killed their mother at a young age.

No, there were a lot of things that set Zim apart from the majority of his peers. There were many reminders to him on a daily basis that he was different from those around him.

One thing that stood out to him, though, was his experiences with romantic attraction- or, more accurately, his lack thereof.

It wasn’t as if Zim didn’t understand love. He knew that love was, in some way, whatever it was that his fathers felt towards one another. He knew that it was the thing written about in cheesy, schmoopy Y/A novels and spoken about in terrible movies aimed at teenagers. It was the focus of so many of the cheesy poems Zim and their peers had to read and annotate.

The only thing was, when Zim thought about love, they didn’t think about romance . Instead, they thought about other things. He thought about his love for his obnoxious mutt puppy back at home, the familial love for his adoptive fathers, the platonic love he felt for his strange friend-enemy, Dib Membrane, and the love for his passions. All of them were very obviously not romantic, but all of them meant the world to him. Gir was what kept him going, some days, and he never failed to make him smile, no matter how annoying the puppy could be. His fathers had taken him in when no one else would, and, although things had been off to a rocky start, their relationship was fairly close and he always worked to make his dads proud of him. Dib was equally as irritating as Gir but understood him on a level most others didn’t and was generally kind to him when he needed it the most. His passions were what drove him and what made his life worth living.

None of the things that he thought of when the word “love” was brought up fit under the generally accepted definition for “love”, but they were what filled his mind anytime the word was uttered.

He supposed he could understand why people would want romantic relationships- the idea of being that close to someone was a beautiful concept to Zim. Having someone that he could share everything with- his life, his interests, his passions- it sounded nice. Having someone who understood him completely and who would never abandon him like so many people had before seemed… wonderful.

He just didn’t see why his relationship with that person had to be romantic.

And, more importantly, while he, to an extent, understood the concept of romantic love… he wasn’t sure that he had ever genuinely felt it, before.

Perhaps Zim was just a late-bloomer. Plenty of people didn’t experience romantic feelings when they were little, and a lot of people didn’t figure things like that out until they were a bit older and had experienced more of their life. Maybe he just hadn’t reached the point in his life where the magical switch that would turn on the flow of sparkling, shimmering romance, yet.

That explanation seemed less and less likely the older he got, however, and he began to wonder if that was really what was going on, or if he would simply never feel the romantic attraction that so many people spoke about.

That idea seemed absolutely ridiculous, though- how could someone simply not experience romantic attraction? It was something that was so ingrained in society that the very concept of not experiencing it ever seemed utterly bizarre. It was in every film, book, TV series, song, and video game- even it wasn’t the main focus of the story. Most people got married- or at least dated . Everywhere he went, there were constantly people around one another absolutely head over heels in love with one another. Things were always marketed towards couples in some way. No matter where Zim went, romance was there in some form or another- he had to experience it eventually, right?

Perhaps it was something else, then. Maybe he just hadn’t found the right person? Finding the “perfect person” was the plot to numerous romance books and movies, so it seemed like a fair enough assumption to make that all he would have o do to experience real love was find the right person.

That explanation didn’t seem right, either, though. Zim was almost entirely certain that, if he did experience romantic attraction, Dib would be the person he would feel it for. It was only logical; they were close friends (even if they were simultaneously enemies) and all of the things that Zim saw as positive about romance and romantic relationships were things he already got from his odd relationship from Dib. When he needed support, Dib would provide it and vice versa. They both pushed one another to succeed and would help one another to do so, in their strange round-about way. They were able to share their interests with one another, and, while they were constantly teasing one another and at each other’s throats, it was clear to both of them that, at this point, it was in a mostly playful manner, and they would never dare to cross the boundaries either one of them had.

Dib seemed like the perfect romantic pair, so… why wasn’t Zim in love with him?

Maybe it was something else- maybe he was just too distracted by other things to focus on love? That explanation made perfect sense! Zim had always been driven by other things and was far more invested in his academics and his various passions than he was with pursuing and maintaining any sort of romantic relationship.

Although, with how much thought he had been putting into romance lately… that explanation didn’t seem correct, either.

Zim was furious- he hated not knowing things- especially when they were important things like this. Being unaware of general things in and of itself was incredibly irritating to him, but not entirely understanding things that not only directly impacted him but were part of him? It was infuriating.

He truly didn’t understand. None of the explanations he could think of for as to why he didn’t experience the mythical and elusive romantic attraction either made zero sense in practice or were easily disproven upon further inspection. All things considered, he had no real reason to not experience romance. He was old enough for attraction to have kicked in already, he had the perfect person already, and it wasn’t as if he were ignoring it, anymore, so why didn’t he feel it ?

According to the internet, one thing that could explain what he was experiencing was aromantic .

At first, it didn’t entirely make sense to him. How could someone possibly just not experience romantic love? Then again… that was exactly where he was at with his own life, at the moment.

It was strange and stressful, but, above all of the other emotions he was feeling… the term felt right . It explained what he had been feeling for years and the experiences he’d had during that time. It showed him through experiences and articles precisely what he had been looking for but that had been just out of reach.

For the first time, Zim found an explanation that made sense .

He was aromantic.

And… he was okay with that.

~~~

Slightly more difficult than coming to terms with the fact that Zim was aromantic was the concept of actually telling people that he was aromantic. He wasn’t particularly interested in telling the majority of people- he didn’t find it particularly important for people to know, and he didn’t exactly have many people that he cared enough to want to tell- but there were still a few people he did want to know.

His fathers, of course, were people he would want to tell, but he wasn’t sure that he was ready for that yet, and wasn’t entirely sure how to broach the topic, so he planned on waiting a bit longer before bringing it up.

Dib, however, was another story.

Zim wanted to come out to Dib. Maybe it was because Dib was the closest friend in his life, at the moment, or maybe it was because Dib had reacted so well to Zim coming out as gender fluid not that long ago.

Coming out as aromantic, though, seemed like an entirely different thing. Aromanticism wasn’t very well-known and it wasn’t incredibly acceptable in their romance-driven society. It hadn’t been too much of a surprise that Dib was supportive of him being gender-fluid considering the fact that Dib was transgender himself, but he wasn’t entirely sure how he would react to Zim being aromantic- or if he would even know what it was.

Regardless, Zim decided that he would talk to Dib about it the next time the opportunity arose. Dib was his friend, even if their relationship was odd, and he was generally a fairly open-minded person who tended to not judge people (or, rather, tended not to judge people based off of things like that - in other ways, Dib could be incredibly judgemental, but typically not about people’s orientations and other similar things).

It wasn’t long before the opportunity for Zim to discuss things with Dib arose.

The two of them sat in the withered patch of grass behind the school, yellowed with lack of water and care, as they worked on a project together. The project was something fairly simple for the advanced placement math class the two of them shared during their fourth period of school, and didn’t give either of them much difficulty. The two of them could have likely easily done the entire project separately, completely on their own and still aced it, considering how well the two of them did in that class, but the teacher had insisted upon all of the students getting into pairs to work on it, so they had caved and decided to work together. Zim didn’t mind, considering it gave them the perfect opportunity to ease their workload while also hanging out together.

Instead of heading back to either of their houses to work on the project, they had decided to just stay in the property surrounding the school, considering how nice it was outside, that day (and the fact that neither of them really wanted to go home just yet), but Zim had more important things to focus on than the pleasant weather of the day.

Zim set down the pen he had been using a moment ago and instead began fiddling with the green, beaded bracelet that hung around his wrist (the same one Dib had given him not so long ago, and that he wore on his more masculine days). He looked towards Dib, who still had his eyes trained on whatever he had been working on, didn’t notice.

After a moment of careful consideration, Zim broke the silence, “Dib?”

“Yeah?” Dib hummed, barely bothering to glance up from his own work.

Zim frowned at Dib’s lack of a response, letting out a quiet huff of air, “There’s something I’d like to tell you.”

“Okay?” Finally, Dib tore his eyes away from what he had been looking at and instead focused on Zim, eyebrows knitting together slightly and tilting his head in curiosity, “What is it?”

“There’s this… thing -” Zim attempted weakly, not entirely sure how to phrase what he wanted to tell him.

Dib just snorted in response, clearly either not noticing or not caring about Zim’s internal conflict over what to say, “ Very specific- that really clears things up.”

Once more, Zim frowned, tossing his friend a glare as he leaned across the small space between the two of them so he could whack Dib with his notebook for his insolence.

“Ow!” Dib cried out, though, from the way he was laughing, it was clear that the light hit hadn’t actually hurt him in any way (plus, Zim knew Dib well enough to know what he could handle, and knew that this was far below his pain threshold), “Okay, okay, go on.”

“It’s kind of difficult to explain, but… I’ve discovered something about myself,” Zim said as he finally decided upon how he would word his feelings, “More specifically, I’ve discovered something about my orientation.”

Dib’s eyebrows raised slightly, though his face remained mostly impassive at that, “Oh, yeah? What did you find out.”

“Recently, I had the realization that I don’t exactly experience romantic attraction,” Zim began, gesturing with his hands mindlessly as he spoke, “Most people do, but I never have. I always assumed that it was something that I would eventually get once I was older, but I’ve still never been romantically interested in someone after all this time. I’ve put a lot of thought into it and I came up with a lot of theoretical explanations for what might cause it, but none of them quite made sense or fit, except the explanation that I just… don’t experience romantic attraction.”

Dib blinked, “So, like… aromantic?”

Zim blinked owlishly as well, taken aback, “What?”

“Y’know, aromantic,” Dib shrugged, “That’s pretty much-”

“No, no, I know what aromanticism is,” Zim shook his head, cutting him off, “I just didn’t know that you knew what it was.”

“I know you don’t think very highly of my intellect, but I do know a thing or two,” Dib rolled his eyes, though there was a joking lilt to his voice, “I do understand though. I mean, I’m not aromantic myself, but I do know what you mean, and it makes sense that you are.”

Zim couldn’t help but smile at that, his shoulders relaxing subconsciously as Dib spoke. He hadn’t noticed that he had tensed up during their conversation.

“Listen,” Dib continued before Zim could say anything, “I know romance and sex and shit are kind of forced down everyone’s throats and a lot of people are assholes about it, but I support you.”

“Good. I’m glad to hear it.”

With that, they fell back into their work and didn’t discuss it beyond that, instead just focusing on their project together, only talking about either what they were working on, or completely inconsequential stuff. The topic of Zim’s romantic orientation didn’t come up again, and it passed without his aromanticism changing anything between them.

Zim was aromantic, Dib knew, and everything was okay.

This was originally posted HERE on Archive of Our Own by your’s truly. 

If you’re interested in my work, I have several other fics posted both here and on Archive. Please DM me if you would like a commission (my first post on here has my rates). 

[sanstropfremir]

please let me join the dance conversation since it's the form of art i am actually the most interested in. i've been dancing as a kid for 6 years, and i don't mean to say that that gave me any type of authority in the domain, but it did leave me with the slight ability to recognize a good performance (or whatever makes a good performance to me, personally) and a great appreciation for valueing dancing as acting, like you said. too often i've seen dance ranking videos from actual life-long dancers who value technical skill above anything else. even if they take into consideration the facial expressions, it doesn't hold much weight and that always lowkey pissed me off. because when i am watching a performance, i care way more about the emotional delivery rather than the technical one. of course, this is not to disregard skill, because emotion without skill just ends up messy. good enough to appreciate as a form of authentic self-expression, but still messy, and mess won't make you a good dancer.

i've really enjoyed seeing you say dancing and acting have a mutual component since i've always felt that way too but never knew how to put it in words. two groups that come in mind when thinking about this are blackpink and itzy, i have no idea how familiar you are with them so i'm sorry if the following come across as foreign to you. but i gotta say, regarding bp, i think there's always been discourse over lisa vs rose as the best dancer. technically, everybody knows lisa is miles ahead, and i have to say she has decent stage presence and some pretty nice facial expressions too (taking into consideration how limited bp's concepts have been so far). rose, on the other hand, has a certain style that appeals to a specific audience (which i am not a part of, her lack of body control is so irritating sometimes) but i can see why some would find her charming. i would say her stage presence is decent too, but i can't help but choose lisa over her, and not just because i'm biased. but because in order to be a true dancer, you need the right balance between technique and emotion that gives your performance that star-value and appeal. and let's be real, kpop is really lacking in that "true dancer" department.

another dancing discourse that goes on is in the itzy fandom, where fans are pitting yeji and chaeryeong against each other. their techniques are quite different but they are each very good in their respective style. now, i've seen people call yeji the better "idol dancer" since she has better developed facial expressions, and chaeryeong the better "overall dancer" since people value her technique more. and i'm just like, no. emotion makes or breaks a dancer. everyone can learn technique, but emotion is hard to fake, and when you do, the non-authenticity is very much obvious.

that's why i love san as a dancer. he might not be the most technically skilled, but he is skilled enough to hold his own. and his way of living in the performance, of just letting every feel of the song wash over him and show the audience 110% and more - nothing compares to that, no amount of technicality. stage presence is something you just have, and no matter how much you train for it, you will pale in comparison to a natural.

wow, this is really long so thank you if you take the time to read it all and respond. english is not my first language and sometimes i'm having trouble finding the right words to get my point across exactly how i think of it in my mind, so i hope the message is delivered accurately, haha :D also, i must add i love the way you talk, your speech has a flow and a uniqueness to it you don't find everyday. and we love a developed vocabulary<3 may i ask how old you are?

thank you for the compliment, thats very sweet of you! english is my native language and i have spent just as much time, if not longer doing academics as i have doing performance work so at this point ive developed a very specific style. there’s a joke that theatre design is 90% communication and only 10% design, and it’s not wrong. it helps that i like to talk and my brain works very fast sometimes.

im glad you took the time to write this out! and don't apologize for your english, it's excellent and very clear. you are correct i know very little about blackpink and itzy but i would likely agree with you, dance is equal parts emotion and technique and that is my preference in idols as well. but i don’t think that the kpop industry needs to have ‘true’ dancers, though. yes it is fun to watch those who are technically and charismatically gifted in dance, it is only a portion of the experience that they market. also i think we lose a bit of objectivity in kpop because all idols are required to dance, but i dont think ive seen one recently that's a legitimately bad dancer. even the ‘worst’ dancers that i can think of are still leagues better than the average person on the street, but we see them as ‘bad’ because they work directly alongside peers who are legitimately gifted and have a passion for dance as a form. 

it's interesting to hear you say that everyone can learn technique but emotion is hard to fake, because i hear a lot of dancers say that. i think this comes from a misunderstanding of what exactly acting is and how it works. i would argue that a statement closer to the sentiment that you (and many others) are trying to get is ‘not everyone can do both at the same time.’ the average person is no more predisposed to acting then they are to dance, because acting is a skill that can be taught and exercised in the same way dance can. sure, there are people that have a higher latent ability, but if you put in the work, you can learn. why do you think there are acting classes and schools and conservatories? you can get a doctorate in acting if you really want to. the thing about acting is that in order to be good at it, you have to both understand and be able to implement the correct postures for mimicking human emotion. this is an insanely complex task when you get down to the brass tacks of it. just think about your face and body posture for a moment. why are you sitting/standing in that particular way? why is your face in that particular expression? what do you think your posture is saying to someone who is observing you? how would you change it if you wanted the person to start a conversation with you? if you wanted them to leave you alone? 

there’s also a general assumption that acting comes from a place of genuine or authentic emotion, and this is the fault of modern ‘method’ film acting. i have a very long thesis about how much i hate method acting and i can make a separate post about that if people are curious. but suffice to say, acting very rarely comes from a ‘genuine’ place. it may be informed from a genuine place, but by nature it is not real. thats what makes it acting. and i think dancers seem to be under the impression that showing emotion while dancing has to come from the dancer personally feeling those emotions, when thats not the case at all. this criminal fancam is a perfect example of exactly how good taemin is at putting on a character for a performance. you can very clearly see him drop character after the main camera cuts, and pretty much any concert footage shows this as well.

now, being able to do both a complex system of physical movements with your body and also control the minute details and timing in your facial muscles and posture? thats pretty fuckin hard. not a lot of people can do that, it takes just as much practice as learning technique does, just not in the way that people might think. but it is possible.

[prettywordsyouleft]

Clueless

Summary: you didn’t understand why Chanyeol was insisting he spend his Friday night with you when he was able to have the company of anyone else on campus.

Pairing: Park Chanyeol x reader

Genre: best friends to lovers / college au / slightly suggestive

A/N: I actually wrote this for another project I was doing with a friend and was too ashamed to post it as originally it went spicier than how it’s presented here. After removing the smut portion this previous weekend, I realised just how much I liked the concept still and wanted to share it. It’s a great lesson, some things don’t work and some will if you view it in a different way! And sorry to smut readers, it was truly awful and we need to just let this story end where it does now XD

Word count: 1759

You barely looked up at Chanyeol when he entered your dorm room and he slumped down on your bed with ease. You went back to the textbook in front of you. “Your head is still stuck in a book? It’s Friday night.”

“Not all of us were blessed with good academics with little effort, Chan.”

He propped himself up on his elbows and chuckled. “For someone who complains enough about their lack of a social life, you’re your own worst enemy Y/N. That assignment isn’t even due for two weeks yet.”

“Sue me for wanting an A.”

“You’re getting a D in social skills,” he reminded and you shot him a glare.

You had known Chanyeol since the first day of kindergarten. He had been nervous as he eyed all the other children playing together whilst he stood at the edge of the playground, and you had approached him, sticking out your hand confidently and introduced yourself as his best friend from that day onwards. You almost laughed bitterly every time you remembered back to your childhood; the tables had definitely turned now. Although you had kept your promise of being his best friend over all these years, as maturity came to you both, Chanyeol had definitely become more popular during high school. He had grown up handsome and was friendly with everyone. You hadn’t been as fortunate and chose books to be your friends when your peers became obsessed with how they looked and interacted around each other. You didn’t have time to waste trying to fit in.

Besides, Chanyeol had always been there regardless of how popular he was.

This continued into your first couple of years of college, Chanyeol breezing through life with all the female population fawning over him and his good grades garnering him equal attention from the other students for help on how to be as successful. You had to admit, even if he had all that attention, Chanyeol was rarely arrogant about his status. It was one of the reasons why you still loved him as much as you had your whole life because he didn’t disrespect others and their own struggles.

Not often anyway.

Still glaring at his dig on your lack of wanting to drink and party on the weekends though, you let out a huff of air. “Do you need to be here bothering me? I’m sure there are multiple people who would be happy if Park Chanyeol turned up at their party tonight.”

“I want you to come with me.”

“Why?”

“Because you never go out,” he answered pointedly, giving you a hard look. “Come on, Y/N!”

“No thank you,” you declined, tapping at your book. “I already have a date with some Ancient scriptures.”

“And that’s why you’re never going to get a boyfriend.”

It shouldn’t hurt as much as it did; after all, Chanyeol was right. You didn’t value meeting up with some guy at a campus party and becoming acquainted with his tonsils like some of the girls seemed keen to do. You didn’t want to knock the experience for them either but it definitely didn’t sound like a plausible way for you to start a relationship. You wanted to know someone before their hands found their way under your shirt, and definitely within a lucid environment too.

“Maybe I don’t want one,” you told him, looking down at the textbook and not taking in anything it said. You were lying and he knew it too.

“Don’t make me remind you of your diary’s entry about how badly you wanted a boyfriend to fall head over heels in love and then marry and have two kids with,” he teased and you gaped at Chanyeol, shaking your head fervently.

“I was fifteen!”

“There’s nothing wrong with starting to look for that now, especially at our age.” Chanyeol scrutinised you for a moment, his ears turning pink. You knew it was a sign to probe for more information and you spun around on your desk chair to face him, forgetting all about Tacitus and his ancient issues.

“Especially at our age, what?” Chanyeol shook his head, diverting his gaze from yours. He was turning shy. You got up to join him over on your bed, prodding him gently. “What are you thinking about?”

“We agreed we wouldn’t talk about it again,” he mumbled and you bit at your lip, feeling the heat course through your own face. Your mind flashed back to puberty after one health class session where you both had tried to understand what was so exciting and fun about being intimate. It hadn’t gone too far and since then, private conversations had been avoided. You could talk to each other about everything except that. And although you were young adults now, it always made you feel juvenile, especially since you hadn’t really experienced anything since then.

You had busied yourself in the realm of books from that moment onwards.

There was suddenly reckless abandon in Chanyeol’s gaze as you flittered your eyes around the room, soon feeling his stare on you. “What?”

“Are you frightened of what comes with having a boyfriend? Is that why you don’t-”

“No!” you cried in horror. You knew Chanyeol had some experience, or at least, more than you. He had dated now and then over the years and you assumed he had gone all the way. With a body like his, from what you had seen over the years at swimming outings and athletic days, you knew any girl would be foolish to say no to him.

You stared down at your own body and sighed heavily.

“Then?”

You glanced up at his question, his gaze encouraging you to explain. You groaned and sat down beside Chanyeol. “I don’t have enough time to date.”

“You don’t have to date to have some fun, Y/N.”

“You know all those books you tease me for?” you mentioned, letting out another sigh. “I think my standards match those.”

“They’re fictional?”

You rolled your eyes. “I want to know someone before I’m intimate with them. To feel comfortable around them and know I’m safe. I don’t want to get drunk and suddenly end up in some random closet or bed and make a mistake.”

“You can get to know someone and do all that, you just have to try.”

“Maybe after I’m done with my degree,” you suggested and Chanyeol shook his head at you. It annoyed you. “What? Not all of us find it easy to invest time in people and keep our grades up like you. Why does it bother you that I’m single and you can have whatever girl looks your way?”

“Can I?” he asked sadly and then sighed. “You’re missing out on experiencing all that our college years offer us. If you wait too long, you’ll get set in your ways and come up with more excuses.”

“E-excuses?!” You pushed him away and folded your arms across your chest. “I’m not making excuses, I’m choosing my priorities.”

“Why don’t you prioritise yourself falling in love then? Your fifteen year old self must be frustrated that you’re growing up to be so, so-”

“So what?” you challenged and Chanyeol smirked.

“Frigid.”

“I am not frigid!” you exclaimed, cringing internally at how your voice rose an octave. “I’ll have you know if the right person came into my life right now, suited my needs and I felt safe with them, I’d have no hesitation!”

“Really?” You nodded. “You’d not even pull back once and tell them to stop?”

“Of course, I’m not stupid! You just told me how much I wan-”

Your entire thought process stalled when you felt Chanyeol’s lips find yours. You couldn’t understand why they were on yours or what had led him to think this even made sense.

Because it didn’t, at all.

But as his mouth moved against yours and your body reacted, suddenly it made complete sense. You closed your eyes and kissed him back, encircling his neck with your arms to steady yourself within the exchange. The first kiss rolled into the next and after several minutes of locking lips with your best friend, you were completely overwhelmed and breathless.

Chanyeol stared back at you, gauging your response. When you didn’t openly protest, he cupped your cheeks within his hands. “Do I match your description?”

“Huh?” You blinked and thought back to what you had said. You swallowed roughly. “Don’t you remember what happened when we tried this as kids?”

“We’re adults now.”

“And you still want to test out sex-ed theories?” Your sentence seemed out of place in the current environment, especially since you hadn’t unlocked your arms around his neck. Chanyeol was far too close to you and refuting any of this because you both panicked years ago would be stupid.

You were stupid because the way Chanyeol was staring at you right now made you realise you had missed something important. You blinked. “Do you like me?”

“Is that all you can ask me after kissing like that?” he asked, shaking his head at you before kissing you again briefly. He chuckled. “You’re so clueless.”

“Really?” you asked and Chanyeol rolled his eyes, though the smile on his lips didn’t leave. You watched his mouth for a moment, feeling the urge to do more.

Leaning back onto his elbows, Chanyeol pointed to his lips you were avidly staring at and smirked. “If you want to find out what you’ve been missing out on, why don’t you kiss me back?”

“That sounds dangerous.”

“I’m dangerous?” Chanyeol mused and chuckled. “I suppose I could be if you actually give me a chance. All these years you’ve been fawning over fictional guys and I’ve been right here. Shall I take my lips somewhere else then?”

He sat up and went to shift off your bed but you stopped him, blinking several times before placing your mouth back on his. You were curious, and his taste was addicting already. The kiss soon turned passionate and somehow you ended up on top of him when you were done. The humour was gone from his expression, replaced instead with adoration.

You still didn’t go out, despite it being a Friday night. But you definitely had different company than the books you had planned to spend it with. As the night wore on, you realised there was more to Chanyeol’s relationship with you that you hadn’t ever expected to try out again.

But you were adults now, and this time it didn’t scare you one bit.

_________________

All rights reserved © prettywordsyouleft

[EXO Masterlist] | [Main Masterlist] | [Request Guidelines]

[happystressedmuffin]

Among the articles I wrote for our school newspaper these past three years, my most successful ones have been on the topic of education / the education system. As a person who has increasingly become disillusioned with the way school’s operate, I have a couple of thoughts. This may end up a little vague and I may go back to explore these ideas in more detail when I have more time.

First things first, my parents used to be teachers back in Belarus, and they often tell me about rules they had and how their schools worked. A lot of my thinking is influenced by them and their stories, in addition to personal experience.

Communication

One thing that American schools as a whole seem to lack is effective communication between teachers. I have seen this again and again, and it’s a shame considering that It’s an issue that can be fixed without bureaucratic measures. Why do teachers still have a difficult time communicating with one another? Countless times, I’ve had teachers schedule tests and quizzes on the same day, leaving students studying for three whole different topics, rather than focusing on carefully understanding one. My dad said when he used to teach, he would talk to the other teachers and they would plan their schedules out in accordance to one another to ensure that the students would not have an overload of work. While I cannot attest that lack of communication is a problem in every single individual American school, I can certainly say that just a couple weeks ago, our IB coordinator walked into our TOK room because our class snapped under pressure and some students were on the verge of tears. When we told her about the mountain of projects and tests, she seemed surprised, and even our TOK teacher decided to move one of her deadlines, because she was previously unaware of the pressure we were under.

Personally, communication between teachers is probably one of the biggest problems in any school system. Teachers should talk with one another and plan their assignments out; if not, at the very least, be ready to change the dates of certain assignments.

Of course, some things cannot be helped -- teachers cannot move standardized test days, and sometimes the speed of the lesson needs to quicken in order to have time to cover all the right material. Of course, that leads to another problem.

Standardized testing // allowing teachers to teach what they want

Standardized testing.  A lot has been said on the topic already. Some countries such as Finland manage to get amazing marks without a lot of standardized tests; other countries get equally impressive marks with a lot of these tests (China). Whether or not standardized testing works depends on different factors, such as how the government operates, how the tests are structured, etc.

For example, the United States is a federalist form of government, meaning that power is shared between the federal and state governments. Largely, education has been a state issue, meaning how schools prepare their children for these tests and even the tests they take differ.

In terms of how the tests are structured, let’s talk about my friend who I will call “V.” V is in higher level classes. V has passed multiple AP tests. V wants to work in the film industry. As we all know, the SAT tests people on math and reading. Now, tell me, what does math and reading have to do with working in the film industry? English is not V’s first language -- he speaks Hindu and Spanish. He is not so bright in math. But if you’d seen the videos he produces, the editing work he does, even the scripts he writes, you could easily tell that this is a bright kid. His SAT score is certainly not bad in the slightest; in fact, it would probably be considered in the upper quartile. Nonetheless, in comparison to most our peers in this particular program (IB), his score seems a little...weak, to say the least. Some colleges rejected him as a result of his testing, which does not reflect the skills he will use later in life. Why should we consider this fair? Obviously, all people should know rudimentary math and reading; however, why should they be judged solely in those two categories?

At the end of the day, the real question we are trying to find is whether or not the state should give more control to the teachers in the classroom. Standardized testing limits what a teacher may teach due to time constraints.

Bad teachers / respect for teachers

And now, let’s bring our focus onto teachers. I have become highly disillusioned with teachers, especially this year. Here are a number of things I have witnessed:

1. A teacher “predicting” what our grade will be on a test and putting it in the grade system as our final grade for the assignment (essentially giving us a grade for something we have not actually done; and she wasn’t kind about it either; I got a C)

2. a teacher claiming we have to learn six chapters in three days and proceeding not to do a single thing to help us learn in class; instead he gave us a pop quiz and told us to read the book (hint: if we can replace you with a plant and have it not influence the class in the slightest, perhaps you need to do some teaching!)

3. A teacher telling us that the highest we can get on an assignment was a 70 and if we wanted something higher, we had to an “optional assignment” 

4. A teacher taking off an entire letter grade because a student wrote the wrong class period on the header.

5. A teacher pausing a student in the middle of a presentation to yell at the student for seeming “too nervous” (how does yelling and humiliation help?)

6. One of my teachers accidentally taught the wrong curriculum for an entire three quarters before finding out that what we were doing was wrong. (I don’t blame the teacher too much -- this was actually a rather complicated situation).

7. A chemistry teacher who sat at her desk eating snacks while she played videos of her teaching, rather than teaching in person.

Now, all of this makes us students want to bang our heads against the wall; especially number 2 and number 6. The same teacher from #2 never read a single one of our essays (problematic, considering this is an AP / IB class) and instead has us peer score every single time. Nobody studies for his class because he curves every assignment so that a student with a D gets an A.

Should students not demand better? One of the issues with teachers, I believe, is that one does not necessarily need a teaching degree to teach; just a degree in the particular subject area. But at the end of the day, knowing a subject does not mean knowing how to teach it. Some people may disagree. Some people may say, a true sign of knowing is being able to teach. But teaching in itself is another art form. It involves communication. It involves a little bit of psychology. It involves knowing how to explain concepts in ways you may not have thought of before (A visual learner may not think to incorporate auditory details, for example). A person may be an awesome biologist, but that same person may not be an excellent communicator (outside of a research paper, that is). A person may be an awesome biologist, but that person may understand little about how an art/literature student may learn concepts. Knowing a subject well does not mean teaching a subject well. To say so insults the very art of teaching.

Another problem when it comes to teachers is a lack of overall respect for the profession. My AP Gov teacher (a really awesome man) was telling us a story about attending his wife’s party with her co-workers.

Someone asked him, “Hey, what do you do for a living?”

He said, “I teach high school government!”

That person frowned. “I’m so sorry!”

“Why are you sorry?” my government teacher asked, confused. “I love my job!”

And that story conveys a giant problem. People in general assume that teaching is a bad job. That we should feel sorry for those who teach. If you look at the amount that teachers get paid, you can tell that the job isn’t as highly valued as it should be. Teachers are entrusted with the entire future. They are tasked with educating future politicians, future surgeons, future historians, future writers, future academics, future working class people who may change living standard for the better. Why should we not pay teachers more? Why should we not make it harder for people to become teachers (increase the required training or make it better) while at the same time paying them more?

Students do not respect teachers too much either. That may be a sentence young people do not like to hear, because we feel cheated in the education system many times. But it’s true that many students do not respect teachers. I am a student; I have seen how the worst of us can behave. My favorite teacher (I’ve had her for all three years now and will have her next year too) talks quite frankly with me, and she always talks about students who put in no work all quarter and then have the audacity to call her and blame her for their grades.

I am quite lazy -- I really am. But I do my work, and I have never had anything below a A in her classes; and the one I’m taking at the moment is an IB class.

However, respect is a two-way-street. To say that students are respected would be a lie. Otherwise, we would be listened to more when it comes to problems that directly affect us.

The ultimate point is -- respect for teachers needs to increase, but we should also cut down on teachers who don’t know how to teach. These solutions seem obvious, but implementing the necessary actions to put them into place certainly isn’t.

Taxes / wealth

A big point to mention -- taxes.  I had any power in this government, I would not have schools be funded by taxes. In order to learn, students should have the resources to do so. How can an underfunded school possibly compete with a suburban, rich school? The education system creates cycles by constantly valuing the rich and punishing the poor.

If you have money, here’s all the things you can do:

-Live in a nice area with well-funded schools

-Buy a tutor for the SAT

-Have enough money to be well-fed; no worries about food

-Buy all kinds of educational programs (rosetta stone, etc)

-Buy more books

-Get invited to go to interesting educational summer camps, and go

-Clubs (basically no clubs are free)

All these things contribute to college applications and success. But what about the student who struggles in math and cannot afford a tutor? What about that student who lives in a poor area and struggles to learn because of underfunded and stressed teachers? What about the student who has to turn down many opportunities simply because that students cannot afford it? What about the student that can’t afford to pay a fee to participate in dance club?

What about those students?

Is it not evident then that those students are put at a disadvantage, and that they never had equality to begin with? Is it not evident that those students will have a harder time getting to a brighter future? 

Here’s some ideas I have seen around that I have not thought too much about, but I do want to look into:

- Religion’s affect on schools (the US has a long history of Protestantism / Evangelicalism; those who structured our schools may have been influenced. It would be interesting to see how religious thought has played into our education system)

-schools shaping students for labor / a career rather than education  / useful life skills

- I would really love to learn about an anarchist’s point of view of the education system. I believe that most anarchists would be pro-education, but they typically are anti-system (anti-authority), right? How would people be educated in an ideal society? (this is mostly curiosity)

[em-smalls-photo-blog]

Gender Communication in the Family and the Division of Labor

Saturday 27, 2020 – Even though I stayed up late last night drinking wine to take the ease off from the stressful week I had, I still woke up at 8am with my toddler to start the day. The first thing I did was get Evie out of her crib, change her diaper, give her a morning bottle of milk, and then sit her on the couch to watch her cartoons while I make breakfast and a cup of coffee. Around 10-10:30am, I let Evie wake up her father. Once he’s awake, I’m able to get some stuff done around the house including dishes, laundry, and cleaning. As Evie plays, my husband watches his show or plays videogames and I’ll do what I need to do. After Evie goes down for a nap around noon, I tell my husband what chores he needs to do and eventually he’ll get around to them, except for taking out the trash. I’m not sure why taking out the trash is a hard concept for him, but sometimes I let it sit there for days until he finally does it. Moreover, while he does his chores, I run some errands around town which involves getting groceries. Once Evie is awake from her nap, I’ll change her diaper, feed her, and then we’ll play with her outside or do something fun. Around 5:30pm, I’ll start dinner and feed the family. At 7pm, my husband and I usually take turns giving Evie a bath most nights and reading her bedtime stories. We’ll put her down for the night around 7:30pm. After that, I’ll do the dishes, pick up after my husband and Evie, get everything ready for the next day, and then do my shower routine. For the rest of the night until bedtime, I’ll work on homework, or watch a movie with my husband, or just have time to myself.

During the week, my husband and I both work full-time and my routine is very similar to Pat’s routine in the Chris and Pat division of labor case study. I wanted to do a different perspective on the weekend because being a mother and a wife is a 24/7 job in addition to everything else. Cerrato and Cifre stated, “Men do not feel an obligation when they are involved in the home as women do, as they perceive it more as a hobby or a free choice… Also, those house chores that keep the home every day (shopping, cooking, washing dishes, washing clothes, and cleaning the house) are considered feminine, while those considered male or neutral tasks (paying bills, taking care of the car or home maintenance) do not involve daily devotion” (Cerrato & Cifre, 2018).

Society has set an expectation for women and men over the years even though society has changed significantly in the last half century. Cerrato and Cifre cited, “As Martínez and Paterna (2009) indicate, gender ideology seems to determine the percentage of tasks considered traditionally feminine by members of the couple, such as washing, ironing, shopping, cooking, or cleaning. It also generates a differential meaning about household chores for men and women. Also, recent studies have shown that there is still a division of house chores by gender, depending on the gender role nuclei: instrumentality inside and outside home for men; expressiveness and instrumentality inside home for women (Fernández et al., 2016)” (Cerrato & Cifre, 2018).

With all of the domestic labor presented, professional women tend to have a disadvantage in the workplace. From getting paid less and being prevented from advancement, women with a career and family struggle to balance the two. “Men are more successful in combining parenthood and academic careers; in fact, the combination of family and career are the norm for men, not women” (Watkins, Herrin, & McDonald, 1998). From my experience, returning to work after only six weeks of maternity leave was rough, breastfeeding and pumping during that time was even worse, and when my child got sick and couldn’t go to daycare, I have to be the one that stays home and misses work. There are so many things to worry about as a working mom and the stress is endless. “Guilt for being at home, guilt for being at work, we all feel it. But we need to take a step back and know we're doing the best we can,” said Horner (2016). The mom guilt is real, and men will never have to deal with that or the struggles we face on a daily basis in general. That’s why it’s important that these family gender roles for domestic labor should be distrubuted equally and not just be a task for women. 

As a disclaimer, my husband is a wonderful father and partner. In saying that and going back to my daily routine, I have to constantly tell my husband what needs to be done and what his jobs are at home because in reality he doesn't actually know. He does his chores when I tell him what needs to be done like I'm his boss for domestic labor. This might be because he was raised in a traditional family, where his dad taught him all the "manly" duties and he wasn't exposed to the household "womanly" duties. “Clearly, we are influenced by the expectations of our culture, family, and peers” (Fixmer-Oraiz & Wood, 2019, p.153). Breaking this chain starts by raising boys to learn and do domestic labor and vice versa with girls, while setting a good example as parents. Fixmer-Oraiz and Wood stated, “Young girls are often praised for being “Mommy’s helper” and interacting with their mothers and younger siblings. Boys, on the other hand, are more likely to be praised for being independent and engaging in competitive play” (Fixmer-Oraiz & Wood, 2019, p. 138). The idea is to not push a gender narrative on children in household roles and merely integrate those perceptions.

Bibliography

Fixmer-Oraiz, N., & Wood, J. T. (2019). Gendered lives: Communication, gender, and culture (13th Ed.). Belmont, CA: Wadsworth.

Cerrato, J., & Cifre, E. (2018, July 11). Gender Inequality in Household Chores and Work-Family Conflict. Retrieved June 28, 2020, from https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2018.01330/full

Watkins, R., Herrin, M., & McDonald, L., (1998). Career and Family. Retrieved June 29, 2020, from http://www.feministezine.com/feminist/modern/Career-n-Family-Dilemma.html

Horner, V. (2016). Smart Breastfeeding Strategies for the Working Mom. Retrieved June 29, 2020, from https://www.workingmother.com/breastfeeding-strategies-for-working-mom

[giraffles]

Blaze of Glory

the second of two non-finale compliant The Adventure Zone fics I wrote in a mad dash before that episode dropped, so spoilers up through all of Story & Song and all that. shout out to my friends who came up with this ridiculous, yet so in character, fic idea. parts got a little more angsty than I intended but I’m real good at that oops. 

content warning for stuff like drug use, murder, and everyone being completely unashamed about such things. listen. it’s ya boys. do you expect anything less??

Blaze of Glory (side Barry/Lup, please check those tags)

One last mission for a dear friend who can't do it himself, a plate of special macarons, and absolutely no dogs on the moon.

you can also read it here on AO3!

"You sure this is the way?" Merle asks for the third time, attempting to peer over the edge of the parchment. Taako shoos him away, pouring his concentration into trying to figure out if the map was right way up. He should have brought a compass. Or someone with any sense of direction. But there weren't many people he trusted to come along on the mission, and even fewer of them who would approve of it. It was a sensitive topic concerning a secretly sensitive man; one who would never quite understand what they were doing, regardless of the fact he had made them promise to carry out his will. Magical memory loss was a funny thing like that; because how can you miss something, be angry about something, feel any emotion, if you couldn't remember it? Even now, with visions of multiple lives he's lead all clear in chronological order, there's still that headache that comes with it. The bitter guilt and anger over not knowing something so important. Which was why it was just him and Merle-- No Magnus, as strange as it felt not to have him there, because Magnus didn't know any more.   "This is definitely the right way." Taako says with confidence far beyond his means. Fake it 'till you make it, he always said. (Or was it Lup who had come up with that one? Maybe things were still a little jumbled.) "Neverwinter is right over there. Beyond that hill." Merle gives him a look that says 'whatever you say, bucko', but only crosses his arms instead of protesting. The dwarf has tried to keep the mood light, and Taako appreciates that, lest the enormity of the situation overtake them. It's one thing to kill bad guys, to strike down jellies and undead and gods-know-what still hid in the dark corners of the world. It's quite another to be actively seeking out someone to murder them. It's not even the murder part that has him distracted. That's easy, and the scumbag deserves it, deserves it a hundred times over for hurting someone so dear. What's got him a little shaken in their part in this new era they've accidentally created. The Day of Story and Song will live on in the collective consciousness of so, so many planes of existence, and they'll always be at the center of it all. Any where they go now, people know. They know of the Starblaster crew, their journey through universes, they know their faces and deeds and some of the stupider things they've done. It makes a lot of things simpler. It makes tracking down a tyrant-ex-governor really fucking hard. Taako resolves to kill him extra dead for making them trudge through all of these swamps. At least anything with two brain cells knows to avoid the two of them, and anything too stupid to get in their path doesn't live long. He can't believe he ever forgot this power, these things that make up his very core, and it's good to burn off a little steam on twig blights and awakened bushes. And now with a decade of extra adventuring under his sleeve, it's only compounded his magical ability. It's the same with all of them. Anyone would be hardpressed to find someone equal to the seven aliens that helped fight tooth and nail for their reality. "D'ya think he's okay?" It's a rhetorical question at heart, yet Merle asks it aloud anyway. "Pff, he's fine." Taako insists as he climbs over a fallen stump and tangle of exposed roots. He has to stop and pull Merle out of the snare when he inevitably gets himself stuck. "I'm sure he's carving ducks or playing ninja or whatever." It's almost too good, how he's able to lie to everyone. Including himself. Because it still feels wrong to be off gallivanting without Magnus. They'd been together for so long, been through tailor made hells and cosmic turmoil as a team. It feels wrong. Merle sighs. "I know, I know. It's for the best. I still feel bad though." "He's fine," Taako repeats, "I made sure someone would be there to keep him busy." And it had been such a trial to arrange everything. Because he had to do it in a way that kept Magnus in the dark while also not raising his suspicions. Luckily, Magnus had been willing enough to accept excuses and place enough trust in them to not notice anything. And maybe that's really what has him in a bad mood, the fact that him and Merle had to betray a man so open and honest. A man who nearly stumbled into their secret meetings about plans and intel one too many times. Taako can't wait to find Kalen and pop one in his ass.

He doesn't catch what Magnus says, but whatever it was, it has Lup laughing hysterically, nearly wheezing as she rolls off the bed. He should really see if she's okay, but judging by her muffled giggles, she's fine for the moment. Barry puts his hand in the cheeto bag, only to come back confused and cheese-less. Had they really finished the whole thing already? "Shh, shh!" Magnus attempts through his own snickers, "You have to be really quiet or it won't work!" "What won't work?" Barry asks. Instead of answering, Magnus rolls onto the floor beside Lup. She's trying to catch her breath, but breaks down any time she tries to look at the fighter. Barry joins them only because Magnus produces a tin of pringles out of somewhere, and certainly not because he felt left out or anything. Certainly not because it's real nice to lay next to Lup and just be, while she's vibrant and warm and very much alive. A lightning strike in mortal form, brimming with destructive potential and yet so sweet in a way that nearly broke him when she didn't come back. Nah. He's here for the pringles. "Lavender." Magnus declares, and Lup loses it again.   "The cookies?" They had been vanilla lavender macaroons, right? With enough of each to cover up the pungent drug Lup added to the batch. Where did she even find weed on a moonbase? "Those were chamomile," Lup sounds almost offended, "He means what you sound like, babe." However that doesn't lend any clarity to the statement. "Shhhh!" Magnus places his hands over both their mouths, "You can hear color." The concept is absolutely absurd, because senses don't work like that, and yet he's seriously considering it. Time has already gone a little funky, slipping sideways and slowing to a crawl. The scholar in him has a little voice that pipes up to say that it's just the altered state they're all in-- but it's soft and hazy, and goes quiet even as he tries to chase the trails of academic thought. Lup is laughing again, and it reminds him of the conservatory, of the way the sun caught her hair on an illuminated afternoon, how they shone like strands of gold. Golden and warm and all wrapped up in each other. "Holy shit." Barry says. "I can do you one better," Lup interjects, "Don't move." "Why not?" "Just trust me." She pats both of them on the arm, though she lingers on his. And they're still for a moment, and then another, even though there's a sensation that the world is trying to move around them. He could stay like this for the rest of the night actually. Even fall asleep, maybe. "Woaaah," Magnus sounds blown away by some secret revelation, "I can feel the ground moving." "I know, right? Fuckin' crazy." Barry isn't convinced that's what they're feeling, but he lets it go. No reason to contest the fact. Not when "Operation Distract-Magnus-For-As-Long-As-Possible" was in effect. So far, so good. Hopefully they would be a little less wasted by the time that Taako and Merle got back. Hopefully, they'd be successful in their own mission, and no one would be the wiser. Then again, he had watched them work for a year. His confidence in them might be a little shaky. But that was a problem for future Barry, not high-as-hell Barry.

"We are not lost!" "It's okay to admit you made a mistake," Merle tries to be comforting, "But this isn't the right street." "We. Are. Not. Lost." Taako spits out from behind gritted teeth. The truth is, they're lost. Again. At least this time they're in the city. The really shitty part of the city. Neverwinter is still rebuilding from the ravages of the Hunger, which is heartening to see, and also made their entrance easier. Whole sections are still in ruins however, broken and sad as people try to pick up the pieces, but no one notices the two strangers in their midst. Taako had the brilliant idea to cast a camouflage spell on both of them, lest they be recognized before they could find Kalen. He's so used to having one on normally that it hadn't occurred to him at first. He played it off as waiting for the right moment.   Somehow, true to their usual adventuring luck, they'd stumbled into the seedy side of town and gotten turned around. He's not scared of what anyone might try to do to them, not when Merle could backhand them into a wall with divine vengeance. It's the principle of the matter, and the fact that they're wasting time that would be better spent fulfilling a blood oath. "Just ask for directions." "No." "Taako," Merle sounds desperate, "Let's just get this over with so we can go home." Taako takes a deep breath. He's right. If anyone out of the three of them was to be the voice of reason-- Two. The two of them. "Fine," he concedes, "I'll ask the next piece of riffraff we see, but I'll have you know it's not my fault if they steal all your gold." Merle makes a comment that it's usually Taako himself doing the stealing, but he barely hears him as they round a corner and nearly collide with a group of rough looking men. He has a moment of regret for making himself look like some sort of ethereal beauty. Merle looks like an unassuming and grubby halfling with the spell, mostly because he thought it would be funny. But now they're staring down three humans and someone who might be half orc, looking at them like treasure has just fallen into their laps. "Hail and well met, my dudes," He forces a smile, "Would any of you happen to know the way to the Cheap Rat?" "That's not a place for the likes of you." One leers at them, at least a full foot taller than Taako. He also smells like he hasn't showered in a week. Gross. "Full of dangerous pieces of riffraff, it is." Oops. Him and Merle make eye contact. 

Suddenly, it's show time. He can say later that it was a badass, almost graceful fight, but it was really a lot of screaming and spell casting, over nearly as soon as it started. Merle even gets a hit in with Smoosher for good measure. Taako steps over their unconscious and bloodied bodies with disdain. At least they're not dead. He's pretty sure they're not dead. The amount of fucks he has left to give are approaching a dangerous low. "God, can't ask for one easy job." Taako complains as Merle wipes his warhammer on one of the thug's shirts. "I dunno, that was pretty easy compared to other times." "I'm not sure if anything can top some of those 'other times'," Taako air quotes, "Good shot at his knee, though." "I wasn't aiming for his knees."  Merle mutters, and he drops that thread of conversation. 

The Cheap Rat is a semi-famous pub in the Rogues Quarter of Neverwinter. It's famous for it's booze, hard-to-find location, the no questions asked policy, and again, the cheap booze. Taako has collected multiple reports of a man matching the slimeball’s description frequenting the establishment. He's reasonably sure this is where they'll find him, and if not, maybe they can get a lead to follow. It's a dingy, beat-up looking place, but is surprisingly crowded and filled with joyous voices within. Another day he might have even considered grabbing a drink there. Taako and Merle turn a few heads when they walk in, but they don't find any trouble beyond having to push through throngs of people to reach the bar. Merle is delighted to find that the bar stools are specifically designed to allow shorter races to climb up them, which is explained when he realizes the woman behind the counter is a halfling. She's installed runners along the back of the bar so she can stand level with even tall elven patrons. "What'll it be, boys?" She asks in a sing-song voice. Another halfling darts behind her with multiple overflowing glasses. As tempting as it is, getting lit probably isn't the best plan. Spell casting while tipsy is a big no-no. "Nothing for me, thanks, but listen, darling," She raises an eyebrow at the pet name but he continues on, "We're looking for a friend of mine." The word 'friend' in this context is like acid on his tongue. Taako smiles through it. She pauses, then leans on the counter towards him. "What kind of friend?" "I thought people didn't ask questions here," Merle pipes in, "Or was that a different rodent-themed bar?" The halfling laughs, and starts pouring a glass of whiskey. "No, you've got the right one. Why don't you two come on back and we can talk?" That sets off a red flag or seventy, but he's not sure he wants to risk trying to read her mind on the off chance the spell will fail. For once they can't rush in and take things with brute force. And he doesn't want any collateral damage, heaven knows Kalen has already caused enough of that already. Magnus wasn't the only one who lost someone when Raven's Roost crumbled. "Alright." He agrees tersely, and Merle follows as the halfling pulls them into a backroom. The door shuts behind them and the sounds of the Cheap Rat instantly cease. Taako senses a warding barrier, typically used against eavesdropping both mundane and magical, and he tries to calm the danger alarms going off in his head. Merle shifts nervously. "I know who you are," She pulls a necklace from under her shirt, "This little baby negates most illusion spells. And may I say, I'm honored to have you both!" Her eyes sparkle with admiration even as he's running through three different escape plans. Like the idiot wizard he was, he never thought that someone might be able to counter something so simple, ruining their disguise and with it the element of surprise. Hundreds of near misses rattle around his head with the chorus of what if, what if, what if; And that's not mentioning the times things went horribly wrong regardless. Merle kicks him. Knocked out of his near-panic trance state, Taako recovers. "Well, uh, that saves us a lot of trouble then." "I'm Tuge," She offers, "Who are you looking for and what can I do to help?" They do their best to explain the situation without giving up too many personal details. The incident at Raven's Roost isn't often talked about, but Tuge already knows about it. Her face darkens when he tells her who they're chasing and why. "That motherfucker," She fishes a key out of her pocket and tosses it to Taako, "Up the stairs, fourth door on the left. Try not to get blood on everything, yeah?" "Loud 'n clear, miss," Merle nods, "Thanks for your time." "Let me know if you need anything else!" Tuge calls after them as they slip out of her warded room and bolt up the tavern stairs. Stealth is neither of their's forte, so he's thankful now for the ruckus of the bar customers below. Even so, they creep along the wall, moving as only fast as they dared to. Taako can barely focus past the rapid fire pace of his heart, ramped up on adrenaline and fear and maybe a little thrill. They reach the fourth door on the left. He places the key in the slot and turns it slowly. They both slip in before slamming it shut behind them. "What the hell?" Snaps a man at the desk. He's aged, but still looking well off enough to maybe pass as nobility. Graying. A little fat. "Who the hell are you?" Taako dismisses the camouflage spell on both of them. Kalen's eyes go wide. "Your worst nightmare." He takes out his wand and Merle casts zone of truth. Because of course he does. At least he's good at it. "It's not--" "Oh no," Merle waves Smoosher, "Oh no, you don't get to try to explain yourself. End of the line, bub." "We were asked to do one thing, and one thing only," Taako snarls, "And that was to kill you fucking dead. This is for Julia." Kalen doesn't have time to grovel before he's shredded by a high-level magic missile.

The trip home to the Bureau of Balance headquarters is done in relative silence. He doesn't want to admit how good it felt to murder that bastard in cold blood. He doesn't want to think about how exhausted it all made him. They sit in the ball in the carrier bay for longer than they need to, quiet, until Avi raps on the glass door. "Uh, guys?" "We're comin'." Merle sighs and pushes the hatch open. Taako follows, mostly on autopilot as Avi chatters about something or other-- "Wait, back up, Magnus is what?" "Crying in the middle of the quad," Avi confirms, "I'm not sure why. The Director-- I mean, Lucretia, she's already there." He groans. He asked Lup to do one goddamn thing. Today has already dragged on too long. Taako braces himself for what they might find while they hurry up to the main level. Lucretia is indeed there, looking more exasperated than concerned, with Magnus sobbing on the grass and Lup gently patting his shoulder. Barry looks like he's asleep face down under a nearby tree. Other employees are giving them a wide berth, with no one even attempting to come close to find out what's wrong. It's a very suspicious scene. "There you two are," Lucretia looks relieved, "He's been like this for the past half hour." "What even happened?" "I promise I'll take care of it and everything!" Magnus weeps, "I can even build a fence so it can't run off the edge of the moon!" "I told him he couldn't get a dog," She explains, "And I really just meant he can't go while he's so... intoxicated? Honestly, I'm not sure what the three of them got into." Taako has a pretty good idea. "It's okay buddy," he hears Lup begin, "I'll go steal you fifty puppies. How does that sound? As many puppies as your big arms can hold." Magnus sniffles. Then he starts crying harder. Lucretia rubs her face. "I guess he's mostly fine." Merle says. Taako tries not to laugh. "I can't protect that many puppies!" Magnus wails, "How am I supposed to protect them all?" "Yeah," Taako agrees, "I think he's gonna be just fine."

[thishazeleyeddemon]

kneel into a dream

y’all I’ve been REALLY feeling bnha recently

Anyway so this is a Tsuyu and Tokoyami fic because I Love Them. No tws except maybe some angst

I hope y’all like!

http://archiveofourown.org/works/11796129 << AO3 link my dudes

Tokoyami is used to having nights to himself.

(Well. For a given value of that, anyway. With Dark Shadow curling around his ribs, digging its claws into his heart, he has long since forgotten what being entirely alone feels like.)

He knows several of his classmates have insomniac tendencies, has seen the light on in Todoroki’s room long after the clock has switched into the AM hours, has heard Uraraka pacing back-and-forth and music drifting from Jirou’s room, but most of them seem to prefer to remain in their own rooms when they can’t sleep. Even if they don’t, they avoid him. He doesn’t think it’s fear that causes that. It’s merely that, if you’re up late, you probably aren’t feeling very social.

In any case: Tokoyami gets the hours of eleven PM to three AM mostly to himself.

Except today, for some reason.

“Hi, Tokoyami.”

Tokoyami does not jump. His feathers do not poof out like a startled bird.

“Hello, Asui,” he says, voice carefully composed.

“Call me Tsuyu,” she says. Ah, yes. As - Tsuyu likes familiarity.

He shifts around on the couch so he can look at her. Her hair isn’t styled, falling around her face in long, tangled teal waves. Her eyes are strange and luminous in the darkness, shining orange like an autumn moon. She tilts her head in that way that she has. He feels examined, but, strangely enough, not in a bad way. There is no malicious intent, merely curiosity.

“You have pretty eyes,” Tsuyu says, and this time Tokoyami cannot deny the way his feathers puff up. Dark Shadow stirs. He hears phantom laughter that he knows Tsuyu doesn’t.

“I, uh - thank you, Tsuyu.” His face feels hot.

She tilts her head again.

“Sorry for embarrassing you,” she says. “You do have nice eyes, though.”

She sits down next to him on the couch. It creaks under her weight, small as she is. She sits fairly close, enough that he is conscious of how little body heat she has. It’s an interesting contrast to Tokoyami, who always runs hot.

“Why are you awake?” he asks. Tsuyu usually went to sleep at a reasonable time. He rarely saw a light under her door after midnight.

She shrugs. “Couldn’t sleep,” she says, and he wonders if maybe that’s not the whole of it, but doesn’t pry. He has no right to demand information from her, no right to ask to know what demons plague her soul.

You’re so dramatic, Dark Shadow snickers. He does not grace that with a reply.

“What are you doing?” Tsuyu asks. He pauses, suddenly remembering what he’s doing.

He mutters an answer.

“Kero?” Tsuyu tilts her head again.

“Preening,” he says a little louder. “I was...preening.”

“I didn’t know you had to do that,” Tsuyu replies, and he feels some tension drain away at the noncommittal tone of her voice, as if this isn’t even a little strange. He’s always been somewhat of a loner, but the concept of Tsuyu Asui thinking he’s weird lodges in his head as something to be avoided.

He has some dead feathers on his lap, and Tsuyu reaches out and takes one, large fingers delicate and careful. She looks at it, and he wishes he could read her better, because he has no idea what she’s thinking at all.

“Part of my Quirk,” she says finally, “Is that I need water more than most people. I don’t think I could go three days without water, like other people can. Do you have traits like that?”

He nods. “I have feathers on most of the rest of my body, and they need preening as well. Additionally, if I don’t cut my nails, they grow into talons.” He pauses, and adds: “I also have a very nice singing voice.”

Tsuyu makes a strange croaking sound. It takes him a second to realize she’s laughing. He peers at her, but there is only genuine amusement, as far as he can tell. Something warm curls in his chest.

“Do you sing a lot? I’ve never heard you.” Tsuyu leans back into the soft couch, eyes drifting momentarily closed. She looks tired - but then, it is 1:34 in the morning.

“Not often,” he replies, and her eyes drift open again. Her tapetum lucidum makes her eyes flash in the light from the window. She makes a soft croak in response, and then, says nothing. She is silent for long enough that he thinks that maybe she has fallen asleep, and is reaching back up to his feathers when -

“Can I help?”

“W - what?”

Tsuyu apparently takes the surprise in his voice as a dismissal, because she says, “It’s fine if you don’t want me to.” He still can’t read her face. Tsuyu is normally expressionless, but he thinks maybe she is going deliberately blank - trying not to scare him? He doesn’t know. He feels unmoored, drifting - feels the thrum of darkness under his skin, and tells Dark Shadow to calm again. There is certainly no threat here.

“It’s not that,” he says carefully. “Why do you want to -” He feels the sentence die in his mouth. There is no way to revive it that won’t make this even more awkward than it is increasingly becoming.

Tsuyu shrugged. “I do my friends’ hair all the time, kero.”

“Oh.”

Tsuyu eyes him. “Did I just friendzone you?”

“Wh -” He’s never been more glad to be a bird. His face would be red as a tomato, he’s certain. “No!” He takes a deep breath. “No, you did not.”

Tsuyu laughs again, quiet little croaks, kero, kero. “That’s good. Because you’re cool and I’d hate to not be able to be your friend.” A brief pause. “I’m also a lesbian, so. You wouldn’t have much of a chance anyway. Kero.”

“Oh.” Tokoyami is quiet for several seconds. “I too am queer.”

“I know.”

Tsuyu apparently just cannot stop shocking him! It’s almost rude! “I - I thought I hid it well!”

“You do. But,” and here Tsuyu winks at him, a gesture made strange by her mostly blank face, “I’m a very observant frog.”

“Oh.” The vice around his heart releases, as much as it ever does (Dramatic, Dark Shadow whispers again, voice filled with schadenfreude).

“So,” Tsuyu says. “Can I do your feathers or not?”

Tokoyami shifts, moving so his feathers are better positioned for her hands. “Simply correct the misaligned ones and pull off the loose, dead ones - and don’t pull off ones that aren’t loose,” he adds as an afterthought.

“Of course not, kero,” Tsuyu huffs. He feels the couch move and shift with her body, as she pulls herself onto her knees and closer to his back. He feels her knees touch him.

“Kero,” Tsuyu croaks. “Calm down, Tokoyami.”

“It’s been awhile since anyone has done this for me,” he admits, and forces himself to take a deep breath, tension leaking away -

“You’ve had a dry spell, huh?”

“Stop it!”

Tsuyu snickers, and touches his head - and oh, that feels nice. He has no hair on his head or anywhere on his body for that matter, but he imagines that this is what having someone run their fingers through your hair is like. Tsuyu is careful, fingers carding gently through his feathers. She isn’t exactly preening him right now, merely stroking cautiously, as if trying to gauge reactions, see what spots are sensitive.

He lets a deep, content sigh fall from his mouth.

“Don’t get too comfortable,” Tsuyu drawls.

Tokoyami shifts. “My apologies.”

Tsuyu laughs again. If he didn’t hear wrong, she sounded quite affectionate, voice filled with warmth. She starts then on the business of actually preening him. Her fingers dig gently into his scalp as she runs her fingers through his feathers, realigning ones that were out of place. Despite himself, he relaxes more, eyes fluttering shut.

“You don't do this very often, do you.” Tsuyu’s voice breaks through the reverie.

“Ah - that's correct. How do you know?

“Your feathers are really messy.” This was stated blandly, with no inflection to indicate insult. Nevertheless, Tokoyami’s face got even more warm. He imagines Satou cooking eggs in the heat from his face.

“I don't often get the chance,” he admits. “It's hard to remember to do on my own.”

“Kero,” Tsuyu says. “You're like Yaoyorozu - I have to remind her to brush her hair sometimes.”  She plucks a feather from him, and he winces at the brief spark of pain.

“Sorry,” she says quickly.

“It's fine,” he says, with equal speed.

They don't talk much after that. Despite himself, Tokoyami continues relaxing. It's hard not to, with how soothing her fingers feel running through his feathers. It sends a wave of calm through his body. His breaths come slower, and deeper, as sleep begins to take a hold on him.

It never feels this nice when he preens himself. And soothing is definitely the right word. Because -

Because -

(Because he is four when Dark Shadow is born, and at a slumber party. He hadn't wanted to go, and his fear is the first thing Dark Shadow feels, his fear and distress and exhaustion. And it is dark in the room. It is so dark.

Because he is seven, and has no friends. He is not bullied, but he knows the only reason for this is because of Dark Shadow, because he is so much stronger than the rest of them. Instead he is avoided. He thinks, perhaps, that this is for the best.

Because he is thirteen, and no one has helped him in years. He gets everything on his own, wins training victories and academic accolades and he does it all on his own. He receives no congratulations, only covert jealous stares. And when he finally gets tired, there is no sympathy. No understanding.

Because he is strong, and terrifying, and self-reliant.

Because he is tired.

Because for once, he wants to be taken care of. Not treated as if he could attack them at any moment, not expected to always stand entirely on his own.)

-  Tokoyami’s head falls forward, a deep shuddering breath coming from his mouth. Tsuyu's hands falter.

“Are you okay?” Her voice is quiet, full of worry. Care. For him. Tokoyami is suddenly afraid.

“Of course,” he says, knowing he sounds stiff.

For a few seconds, Tsuyu does nothing. She starts again eventually, still handing him delicately. He has never been treated like he was something delicate before, like he was something rare and precious. It is - it is new. He can't analyze it beyond that.

He doesn't want to move away.

“Why could you not sleep?” Tokoyami asks.

Tsuyu says nothing for several seconds.

“Tsu-”

“Nightmares.” It is a word flung away like one might toss away something they did not realize was distasteful. It's like she's trying to get it over with. She moves again behind him. He thinks he can feel her long, teal hair on his shoulders - it is smooth and cool.

“I get nightmares sometimes.”

The moonlight coming through the window is silver and clear. The two of them are sitting in shadow, though, hidden in darkness. Anyone entering the room would not immediately be able to see they were there. They are - they are safe.

“What do you dream of?” He tries to speak quietly, carefully. She is handling him with care, he will do the same for her.

Tsuyu does not speak again for several seconds. She does not seem to be preening him now so much as simply petting, stroking his feathers.

Eventually: “Do you remember the USJ attack?”

“Of course. I was warped to the Downpour Zone along with Kouda. Where were you?”

“By the main battle.”

“Oh. You saw All Might fight Nomu, then?”

“Yes, but -”

“But what?”

When Tsuyu speaks again, her voice is measured and controlled, but not natural-sounding. He thinks maybe she is trying to avoid showing emotion. This is impressive, considering what she speaks of.

“One of the people who came there to kill All Might...he tried to kill me. He was going to use his Quirk on me, and turn me into dust. He said something about damaging All Might’s pride as the Symbol of Peace. He was going to kill me just to hurt All Might’s pride…”

Her voice trails off. Her hands still.

Tokoyami twists around to face Tsuyu.

Her face is still mostly expressionless. That's fine. Her large eyes, filled with unshed tears, and her hands, which are balled into fists on her knees, speak enough for the rest of her.

“I would have died just to hurt All Might’s pride,” she says again. Her voice is distant.

Tokoyami is no genius. He knows this. But even a fool could see what to do here.

He wraps his arms around Tsuyu's slim body. She puts up no resistance at all, falling forward onto him. She is so small. She is only a few inches shorter than him, but right now, she is so small.

She is crying in earnest now, tears soaking into his pajamas. Her whole body shakes with it, little croaks spilling out of her mouth.

“I know this is silly,” she manages to get out in between sobs. “I know it's been months, but I just - he was going to disintegrate me -”

“Shhh,” Tokoyami whispers. He strokes her hair, and wishes he hadn't asked - not because he didn't want to comfort her, but because - she looked so small. So small. “Shhh. It's okay. It is.”

“I haven't… I couldn't cry when I went home that day,” she confesses. “My parents were out on a business trip and my siblings needed me to make dinner and I felt like I was dying and I couldn't cry…”

“Shhh,” he says again. “You can now. I don't mind.”

She does, her small body shaking against him, breath coming out as gasps. Dark Shadow comes out, but all that it does is pat her head. Dark Shadow is not made for gentleness, but it is doing a good job.

“It's okay, Froggy,” Dark Shadow whispers. “It's okay.”

Tsuyu manages a smile for Dark Shadow. She takes a deep, shuddering breath. She is no longer crying, but makes no move to get off of him. In fact, she moves so she is curled more into him, head nestled under his neck. He does not tell her to move.

“I'm sorry,” she says, eventually. “It was nice, and then I went and started crying everywhere.”

“Don't apologize, I think you needed that.” Dark Shadow hums in agreement, and strokes her hair again.

“It's okay little Froggy,” it says again. “Don't cry. I don't like that.”

Tsuyu sniffles. Much to Tokoyami’s amazement, she reaches up and pats Dark Shadow’s head, petting it gently. Dark Shadow doesn't seem to know how to react to a friendly touch either, and flinches. Tsuyu pauses, hand still raised, and Tsuyu and Tokoyami watch as Dark Shadow slowly presses its head back into her hand, closing its golden eyes.

Tsuyu smiles, as best as she can, and Tokoyami thinks all of a sudden that the time in which they had been in the same class and not been friends was time wasted. He feels less ragged than he has in years, and it is a new feeling, and it scares him, and he loves it, like a starving wolf loves meat. He was starving.

Dark Shadow eventually retreats back into Tokoyami, patting Tsuyu's head as it went. “Bye bye little froggy,” it said to Tsuyu. “Don't cry.”

Tsuyu does not move. She stays curled into Tokoyami. She is holding him now too, he realizes. One arm curls slightly around his body too. It is…it is nice. He feels content.

“You remind me of my friend Habuko,” Tsuyu hums.

“How so?”

“Everyone thinks you're frightening, but you're actually just a dork. A soft dork. And you have an animal head.”

“You have a type, then?”

She stares up at him, obviously shocked, before laughing. Kero, kero. He laughs too, conscious of how foreign it feels in his mouth.

“That's a dorky joke, kero.”

“And yet, you still laughed.”

“I like dorks.” Tsuyu raises one hand and begins counting off. “Habuko, Ochako, Deku, you -”

“I see your point, Tsu.”

Tsuyu says nothing, and for a moment Tokoyami feels a thrill of panic run through him - was that too much -

Tsuyu yawns. She stretches, as best she can when she's still in Tokoyami’s embrace, and settles back against him. She makes another soft little croak.

She's so comfortable around him. Terror rises inside him, but all he does is wrap his arms tighter around Tsuyu. She trusts him. He can't let her down.

He sighs. It's so late. He feels exhaustion rising, a soft, dark wave. He leans back to rest his head against the armrest of the couch, and Tsuyu follows the movement. Her hair tickles his neck.

“We should go to sleep,” Tsuyu says.

She does not move.

“Perhaps,” Tokoyami replies. He hears sleep thick as syrup in his voice. He does not move either.

Tsuyu reaches up and scratches his head, runs her hand through his feathers. He sighs again.

“That feels nice,” he murmurs. “Peaceful.”

“Kero,” Tsuyu murmurs. Her hand stills.

~••••~

The next thing they know, they are being awoken by peals of laughter, shrill awws, and the click of a phone camera.

Tokoyami opens his eyes and for a split second thinks he might be hallucinating, because they seem to be covered by a thin blanket of darkness. Then it moves, and Dark Shadow peels away from him so he can see clearly.

The people who have found them are Kaminari and Ashido. Kaminari has his phone out, and Ashido is squealing.

Tsuyu, he sees, is still asleep on his chest. Her breathing coming deep and slow, she doesn't seem to be having a nightmare, unlike him.

“Nice job getting a girlfriend, dude!” Kaminari says, jovially.

“You two are so cute together!” Ashido cheers.

Kill me, Tokoyami thinks. To Ashido and Kaminari, he says, “You jump to conclusions. Ts - Asui and I are not dating.”

“Oh, sureeee you're not,” Kaminari drawls. Tokoyami’s eyes narrow.

“We are not,” he repeats. “Asui merely had a hard night. She required comfort.”

“What kind of comf -” Ashido starts, face twisted into a huge grin. Dark Shadow, who had not retreated into Tokoyami, still high on darkness, snarls at her.

“Leave Froggy alone. You're irritating,” Dark Shadow growls. Ashido gulps, perhaps remembering her Sports Festival loss to Dark Shadow, and pulls Kaminari away.

Tsuyu finally stirs. She blinks sleepily at the world around her.

“You're not my bed,” she says to Tokoyami.

“I'm not,” he agrees, and pulls himself properly into a sitting position. Tsuyu moves off him, standing and stretching.

“Kaminari and Ashido think we're dating now,” he tells her. Might as well get it over with.

“Nah, Ashido doesn't, she knows I'm gay.” Tsuyu runs her hands through her hair. “She was just messing with you. Kaminari probably does, but Jirou will set him straight. He tells her everything, so I'm sure she'll find out.”

“Huh.” Tokoyami doesn't know what to say to that.

Dark Shadow pats Tsuyu's head. “Good morning, froggy.”

“Hello, Dark Shadow.” Tsuyu pats it back.

Dark Shadow yawns, and retreats back into Tokoyami’s body. He feels it begin to sleep, as it usually does during the day when left alone.

Tsuyu stretches again. “It's Saturday, right?”

“It is indeed.”

Tsuyu turns to him, and gives him the best smile her face can muster. “Want to go out to get some food?”

Tokoyami did his best to smile back. “I think I would like that very much.”

“Cool. I’ll go ask some of the girls, too.”

“Wait, what?”

Tsuyu paused at the doorway. “Also - thank you for last night, Fumikage.”

“You're welcome, but what was that about -” Tsuyu was already gone. “Tsuyu!”

(It turned out to be Jirou who went with them. He could live with that. Plus, he and Jirou had basically the same music taste.)

Fin.

[batterymonster2021]

The Future of College

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/the-future-of-college/

The Future of College

The mannequin of larger education that weve inherited is you go to college, you get your diploma, you go by means of commencement, finished. We dont are living in that world anymore. So now lets speak about the two R that had been in that equation So R subscript E is the desired return to equity holders. And we’re going to follow a model that is noted in finance called the capital asset pricing model.This trainer is creating a digital learning experience with the help of a workforce at Georgia Tech university. As soon as its integrated right into a path, her lecture might be watchable wherever her students can get on-line. Its part of a trend thats spurred a fair amount of hype. Would this be a revolution for on-line education? I have to surprise if physical school rooms might emerge as one more casualty of the web age. Its tough to imagine a future for university that isnt touched come what may by the continuing digital revolution. But the extensively-hyped guides that are huge, open and on-line, so-called MOOCs that emphasize passively gazing video lectures, they prove to have a disappointing track file. It can be a priviledge for me to be your calculus professor this time period, and i’m comfortable that you’ve chosen this course.One learn of a million customers determined best four percent of scholars ever accomplished their path. Which is why some educators say reinventing institution isnt as simple as posting a video online and observing the entire world be taught. It is a misnomer to suppose that on-line schooling is less work. It’s a lot more work palms on with the pupils, but the work’s dispensed in a method that’s consistently making the course better versus constantly making the direction run. At Georgia Tech, Joshua Donegal is taking a computer science class and, whilst he hardly ever meets his professor in individual, he sees him ordinarily like this. I don’t consider it’s viable to slack off, you recognize that there is an additional human on the other side of the reveal observing over you, checking you, making definite that you appreciate the concepts. On the opposite side of the country in San Francisco, a brand new tuition called Minerva only presents courses as on-line seminars. And at the same time everyone here takes their lessons remotely, academics track students as intently as if theyre in the same room. Most likely more. Its a are living video environment the place up to 20 scholars / professors can have interaction with one-one more in actual time.All the classes are synchronized. It is about actual time communique. I consider if you came to a Minerva type with a hangover, you might regret it via the tip. Welcome to monetary Modelling. Each of these colleges bill themselves as being on better educations innovative, and both are going through an financial truth, which could shock individuals who think technological disruption always way saving lots of cash. If you do online correct, it’s not low cost. Economist David Feldman says digital technological know-how is not more likely to lead to an international the place each person skips university and gets an online measure totally free. Getting a school measure shouldn’t be a financial assurance. Nothing is a financial guarantee. However over the last 35 to forty years, getting a university measure has emerge as an ever better wager. Which is why, despite mounting scholar debt, going to institution generally makes sense, even for men and women who borrow to pay for it. The data are very clear that probably the most promising way for anyone who starts out on the backside of the income distribution, who comes from a low income family to move up, the satisfactory manner to try this is to get a bachelors measure.I certainly consider that college is extra fundamental than ever, period, full stop. And that i think that we ought to be remaking schooling. One of the most extra urgent motives for this variation grows out of a new truth graduates will face as technological know-how transforms the landscape of employment. The arena is moving so rapid that you simply are not able to go to school for four years and be all set for 4 years. If your focus is on, "Let’s make this 18-12 months-old quite completely satisfied with going to football games," you’re not going to stay in business very long. There are persons which are altering jobs 5 – 6 times over the path of their profession. They are usually in industries where disruptive alternate is taking place always. And so, they arrive again to universities and say, "can you help me with this?" And this has some scholars and universities rethinking the model of school as a single stage of life. So the ancient model for institution was once that folks would exhibit up as 18-year-historic excessive university graduates, spend four years with you, and then you could ship them out and they might work for the subsequent forty or 50 years.And this classic mannequin of tuition is more recent than you would believe. Essentially the most long-established clich I hear about education is that is hasnt modified in 2000 years. Thats wholly now not actual. In the end of the nineteenth Century, each European and American schools realized the whole world had been industrialized. You had to have a further role in society. You had to one more kind of schooling, and schooling went through huge transformations. A lot of the matters we take as a right in the us tuition expertise like entrance exams, more than one option questions, grades, even the divisions amongst many educational disciplines had been adopted throughout one other time of rapid technological change, between the Eighteen Eighties and Twenties. And we now equally ought to go through big transformations for a world that’s not an industrial world, but an interconnected, linked world.And that i continually say if folks did this in 1890, we will alternate bigger schooling now. I suppose have been at the tipping point, and have been about to peer gigantic alterations in bigger education from inside of. And Georgia Tech is betting on this future with applications like a full-credit score masters measure in pc science that pupils can take online, from anyplace on the planet. The brand new model is that persons come again to you episodically over the direction of their lifetimes.The net master’s application is a window into this future that we suppose. University isnt for children. I mean, Im 36 years old now. I have three kids Ive been working professionally for a number of years. But I find it very helpful to come back back to the university environment to aid make stronger my skillset. Otherwise, I might be at the back of the eight ball. And its not simply mid-profession experts who are feeling this strain. Sarah Hernandez is a 24 12 months historical aerospace engineer who, shortly after graduating with a mechanical engineering measure from Rice institution in 2016, landed what you might suppose is the job of a lifetime. I am a study engineer at the NASA Ames research middle here in Mountain View, California. And that implies I climb around wind tunnels, hooked up experiments, run wind tunnels, take information, and then analyze the data after the fact.We test something from just 18 wheelers to full sized rockets. I’d wish to suppose this kind of makes me a rocket scientist… On the grounds that I work on rockets. Yeah. However she needs to check her potential to a workplace thats becoming more digital at all times. Thats why, slightly more than a year out of tuition, shes going back taking Georgia Techs masters in pc science software from residence. There is a variety of scary stuff available in the market in terms of the place the arena’s heading. I feel numerous us are just very antsy proper now. That is type of how i’m coping with it. The fact of the sector we’re in proper now’s that you have got to preserve finding out and keep retooling yourself to be, priceless in our society, which is lamentably how our society features. I think like I constantly have got to be accelerating. Which could advise that, for many of us, the way forward for tuition shall be extra of it. The venture, for pupils, will be finding ways to pay for more schooling especially when theyre in between jobs. Some advocates are calling for faculties to rethink the industry mannequin for education thats lifelong.Im interested and encouraged via a brand new development of many universities to offer lifelong alumni advantages the place which you can come back to your possess university and both for a reduced cost, or generally even free, take lessons. Its good trade on colleges section to do that, but its additionally a sense that we owe whatever to you for the leisure of your existence. .

[airoasis]

The Future of College

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/the-future-of-college/

The Future of College

The mannequin of larger education that weve inherited is you go to college, you get your diploma, you go by means of commencement, finished. We dont are living in that world anymore. So now lets speak about the two R that had been in that equation So R subscript E is the desired return to equity holders. And we’re going to follow a model that is noted in finance called the capital asset pricing model.This trainer is creating a digital learning experience with the help of a workforce at Georgia Tech university. As soon as its integrated right into a path, her lecture might be watchable wherever her students can get on-line. Its part of a trend thats spurred a fair amount of hype. Would this be a revolution for on-line education? I have to surprise if physical school rooms might emerge as one more casualty of the web age. Its tough to imagine a future for university that isnt touched come what may by the continuing digital revolution. But the extensively-hyped guides that are huge, open and on-line, so-called MOOCs that emphasize passively gazing video lectures, they prove to have a disappointing track file. It can be a priviledge for me to be your calculus professor this time period, and i’m comfortable that you’ve chosen this course.One learn of a million customers determined best four percent of scholars ever accomplished their path. Which is why some educators say reinventing institution isnt as simple as posting a video online and observing the entire world be taught. It is a misnomer to suppose that on-line schooling is less work. It’s a lot more work palms on with the pupils, but the work’s dispensed in a method that’s consistently making the course better versus constantly making the direction run. At Georgia Tech, Joshua Donegal is taking a computer science class and, whilst he hardly ever meets his professor in individual, he sees him ordinarily like this. I don’t consider it’s viable to slack off, you recognize that there is an additional human on the other side of the reveal observing over you, checking you, making definite that you appreciate the concepts. On the opposite side of the country in San Francisco, a brand new tuition called Minerva only presents courses as on-line seminars. And at the same time everyone here takes their lessons remotely, academics track students as intently as if theyre in the same room. Most likely more. Its a are living video environment the place up to 20 scholars / professors can have interaction with one-one more in actual time.All the classes are synchronized. It is about actual time communique. I consider if you came to a Minerva type with a hangover, you might regret it via the tip. Welcome to monetary Modelling. Each of these colleges bill themselves as being on better educations innovative, and both are going through an financial truth, which could shock individuals who think technological disruption always way saving lots of cash. If you do online correct, it’s not low cost. Economist David Feldman says digital technological know-how is not more likely to lead to an international the place each person skips university and gets an online measure totally free. Getting a school measure shouldn’t be a financial assurance. Nothing is a financial guarantee. However over the last 35 to forty years, getting a university measure has emerge as an ever better wager. Which is why, despite mounting scholar debt, going to institution generally makes sense, even for men and women who borrow to pay for it. The data are very clear that probably the most promising way for anyone who starts out on the backside of the income distribution, who comes from a low income family to move up, the satisfactory manner to try this is to get a bachelors measure.I certainly consider that college is extra fundamental than ever, period, full stop. And that i think that we ought to be remaking schooling. One of the most extra urgent motives for this variation grows out of a new truth graduates will face as technological know-how transforms the landscape of employment. The arena is moving so rapid that you simply are not able to go to school for four years and be all set for 4 years. If your focus is on, "Let’s make this 18-12 months-old quite completely satisfied with going to football games," you’re not going to stay in business very long. There are persons which are altering jobs 5 – 6 times over the path of their profession. They are usually in industries where disruptive alternate is taking place always. And so, they arrive again to universities and say, "can you help me with this?" And this has some scholars and universities rethinking the model of school as a single stage of life. So the ancient model for institution was once that folks would exhibit up as 18-year-historic excessive university graduates, spend four years with you, and then you could ship them out and they might work for the subsequent forty or 50 years.And this classic mannequin of tuition is more recent than you would believe. Essentially the most long-established clich I hear about education is that is hasnt modified in 2000 years. Thats wholly now not actual. In the end of the nineteenth Century, each European and American schools realized the whole world had been industrialized. You had to have a further role in society. You had to one more kind of schooling, and schooling went through huge transformations. A lot of the matters we take as a right in the us tuition expertise like entrance exams, more than one option questions, grades, even the divisions amongst many educational disciplines had been adopted throughout one other time of rapid technological change, between the Eighteen Eighties and Twenties. And we now equally ought to go through big transformations for a world that’s not an industrial world, but an interconnected, linked world.And that i continually say if folks did this in 1890, we will alternate bigger schooling now. I suppose have been at the tipping point, and have been about to peer gigantic alterations in bigger education from inside of. And Georgia Tech is betting on this future with applications like a full-credit score masters measure in pc science that pupils can take online, from anyplace on the planet. The brand new model is that persons come again to you episodically over the direction of their lifetimes.The net master’s application is a window into this future that we suppose. University isnt for children. I mean, Im 36 years old now. I have three kids Ive been working professionally for a number of years. But I find it very helpful to come back back to the university environment to aid make stronger my skillset. Otherwise, I might be at the back of the eight ball. And its not simply mid-profession experts who are feeling this strain. Sarah Hernandez is a 24 12 months historical aerospace engineer who, shortly after graduating with a mechanical engineering measure from Rice institution in 2016, landed what you might suppose is the job of a lifetime. I am a study engineer at the NASA Ames research middle here in Mountain View, California. And that implies I climb around wind tunnels, hooked up experiments, run wind tunnels, take information, and then analyze the data after the fact.We test something from just 18 wheelers to full sized rockets. I’d wish to suppose this kind of makes me a rocket scientist… On the grounds that I work on rockets. Yeah. However she needs to check her potential to a workplace thats becoming more digital at all times. Thats why, slightly more than a year out of tuition, shes going back taking Georgia Techs masters in pc science software from residence. There is a variety of scary stuff available in the market in terms of the place the arena’s heading. I feel numerous us are just very antsy proper now. That is type of how i’m coping with it. The fact of the sector we’re in proper now’s that you have got to preserve finding out and keep retooling yourself to be, priceless in our society, which is lamentably how our society features. I think like I constantly have got to be accelerating. Which could advise that, for many of us, the way forward for tuition shall be extra of it. The venture, for pupils, will be finding ways to pay for more schooling especially when theyre in between jobs. Some advocates are calling for faculties to rethink the industry mannequin for education thats lifelong.Im interested and encouraged via a brand new development of many universities to offer lifelong alumni advantages the place which you can come back to your possess university and both for a reduced cost, or generally even free, take lessons. Its good trade on colleges section to do that, but its additionally a sense that we owe whatever to you for the leisure of your existence. .

[nefariouscryptid]

Ui.: by the character solidifying prompt with Rita, at the parents' section I obviously meant her adoptive parents and at the sibling section also her adoptuve ones (if she has any)! Just sayin', haha!

You got it, and to answer your last question, She’s a natural redhead but she does dye her hair that bright red haha. Her natural hair color is more of a copper.

1. How does your character think of their father? What do they hate and love about him? What influence - literal or imagined - did the father have?

Rita’s dad was a detached man from his family. It was clear that he never wanted to settle down and have kids, get married ect. He was someone absorbed in his work and personal desires, and neglected everyone around him. He was cold and callous, not outright mean but disinterested in his children and wife. Rita can’t even have an opinion on anything personal about him, because she never knew. But she dislikes him greatly. But because of how little he was there, she can’t even dislike him as a person, just his lack of. He had no influence on her.

2. Their mother? How do they think of her? What do they hate? Love? What influence - literal or imagined - did the mother have?

Her mother was very snappy, but also pushed her to success. She had a girl boss attitude, and pushed Rita to constantly strive for greatness and to never rely on anyone. With this Rita became very intelligent and independent, but with that came inability to connect with others, and working herself to death because of her desire to to everything herself. She can’t rely on anyone or let anyone help her, cause in her eyes that makes her weak. Rita could never take a break because she feels like she’s wasting her life and her purpose has left. She thinks highly of her mother, but is also hurt by her.

3. Brothers, sisters? Who do they like? Why? What do they despise about their siblings?

She was pitted against her siblings a lot, everything becoming a competition. She had to be better, and if she wasn’t it was always “why can’t you be like your brother? Your sister?” Her relationship with her brother and sister was built on competition and bitter jealousy. But she likes their personalities. They, when away from their parents, were fun to be around.

4. What type of discipline was your character subjected to at home? Strict? Lenient?

Strict, constantly made to make something of herself while also punished for going outside the box or defying authority.

5. Were they overprotected as a child? Sheltered?

Sheltered, but not overprotected. She never got much choice in what she wanted to do or be friends with.

6. Did they feel rejection or affection as a child?

Rejection constantly from her family, and rejection from peers. She wasn’t allowed to be a child, often portraying herself as an adult when she was a child and teen. People around her didn’t even see her as a kid.

7. What was the economic status of their family?

They were very wealthy, higher class. Not the 1%, but clearly very well off and had connections.

8. How does your character feel about religion?

Grew up an atheist, and believes religion to be very restricting and illogical

9. What about political beliefs?

She separated herself from politics but of course supported whatever benefited her. She considers herself to be more of a centrist or a republican with left leaning ideas (or whatever equal the new world had)

10. Is your character street-smart, book-smart, intelligent, intellectual, slow-witted?

Very book smart, and socially smart. She’s a very intelligent woman, but only in whatever field she needs to know. She can fake it till she makes it in most aspects

11. How do they see themselves: as smart, as intelligent, uneducated?

She thinks she’s smart, rightfully so.

12. How does their education and intelligence – or lack thereof - reflect in their speech pattern, vocabulary, and pronunciations?

She’s very outspoken and backs up all her ideas with evidence, memorizing her sources completely. She’s great at debating, which is something she does often. She doesn’t use much slang, but cusses slot

13. Did they like school? Teachers? Schoolmates?

She doesn’t like school because if it’s restrictions and the people she’s surrounded by. Her teachers admired her but never taught her what she wanted to know. She felt discontent with school in general

14. Were they involved at school? Sports? Clubs? Debate? Were they unconnected?

She was in many debate classes and academic clubs

15. Did they graduate? High-School? College? Do they have a PHD? A GED?

She never went to college, just straight into government. But she graduated high school with a 4.0

16. What does your character do for a living? How do they see their profession? What do they like about it? Dislike?

She’s an intel grabber, she spies on the people and to see if any riots are being planned, and she also did a lot of spying on the revolution that was brewing thanks to Morgan.

17. Did they travel? Where? Why? When?

She travels everywhere across the world for work

18. What did they find abroad, and what did they remember?

She wasn’t able to really do or see much, had to go to work and then leave, but she always liked to look out from the plane window and see whatever she could.

19. What were your character’s deepest disillusions? In life? What are they now?

She held great disappointment in her family, a lot within herself too. Her disappointment in the end became focused on herself.

20. What were the most deeply impressive political or social, national or international, events that they experienced?

The whole entire revolution lol

21. What are your character’s manners like? What is their type of hero? Whom do they hate?

She’s fairly polite but also comes off as rude because she has strong opinions and the tendency to voice them at all times. She is a talker lol. She doesn’t care about the whole concept of being a hero, but she hates people that are all talk or care about facades too much. Slightly ironic.

22. Who are their friends? Lovers? ‘Type’ or ‘ideal’ partner?

Aj, a few co workers, and Donovan are her friends. Donovan becomes her fiancé after a few years of knowing each other, Rita becoming a stand in mom for Donovan’s daughter

23. What do they want from a partner? What do they think and feel of sex?

She wants someone who doesn’t make her feel stupid or like she needs to mind herself, and also wants someone to match her intelligence. She likes to banter and she likes to feel a connection with same views and lifestyle. She likes sex, but she doesn’t see it as a necessity

24. What social groups and activities does your character attend? What role do they like to play? What role do they actually play, usually?

She doesn’t have much of a social life, being mostly absorbed by her work and just not having much success with socializing, but she likes to get coffee with coworkers and she likes rollerskating with a few friends. She likes to be the planner for the day or leader, but most of the time she just lets things happen and is trying to let other people get their word and voice in. She’s learned that it’s best to let others talk when it’s not about work. She can’t be the leader all the time yk?

25. What are their hobbies and interests?

Rollerskating, reading, and she likes to make coffees

26. What does your character’s home look like? Personal taste? Clothing? Hair? Appearance?

She lives in a small upscale penthouse in the city. Her security increases as the story goes on, and she tints her windows. She’s on the upper floor (46 of 100). Her clothing style is usually comprised of tank tops, short shorts, dress pants, heeled boots, and necklaces. So kind of an edgy buisiness casual. She has natural copper red hair but dyes it to be bright red, and keeps it long on top but buzzed everywhere else. As far as makeup goes, dark eyeshadow with red lipstick.

27. How do they relate to their appearance? How do they wear their clothing? Style? Quality?

She wears high quality clothing, all either tailored to be skinny on her and showing off any curves. I wouldn’t call it edgy, but it’s more of a sharp buisness casual or fashionable casual.

28. Who is your character’s mate? How do they relate to him or her? How did they make their choice?

She remained single for a long time but then got with Donovan. They’re both cocky, outspoken, argumentive, and loud. It was a gradual thing, from being annoyed at each other’s presence and finding solace in each other, especially after Donavan came to terms about Rosalina and how she is. They became each others rock, both finding comfort in eachother through relatability and being reliable. They were exciting to each other while also being familiar.

29. What is your character’s weaknesses? Hubris? Pride? Controlling?

Rita is very controlling verbally. She’s terrified of losing things, terrified of being overpowered and rejected, so she constantly tries to get her word in and is often unwilling to hear other people’s side. She’s narcissistic in that she thinks she’s right and everyone else is either wrong or based on emotions only. And in that sense she’s also hypocritical

30. Are they holding on to something in the past? Can he or she forgive?

She’s holding onto the mindset her mother made her have, and having a hard time letting herself relax and rely on others. She’s also hurt by how’s she’s been treated in life, both by her family and peers. She can’t ever forgive, but she can move on.

31. Does your character have children? How do they feel about their parental role? About the children? How do the children relate?

No biological children but she’s sees Donovan’s daughter as her own. Loves her to bits. She’s glad she was able to ease herself into it and how smoothly it went. She likes how his daughter is shy, and is mindful as to not push her lifestyle onto her. She’s able to be the mother she’s always wanted. Donovan’s daughter loves her.

32. How does your character react to stress situations? Defensively? Aggressively? Evasively?

She gets very snappy, defensive, and freaks out. But the worst the situation gets, the quieter and afraid she becomes.

33. Do they drink? Take drugs? What about their health?

Drinks wine and smokes cigarettes. Other then that she’s healthy.

34. Does your character feel self-righteous? Revengeful? Contemptuous?

She feels entitled, a leader, and controlling

35. Do they always rationalize errors? How do they accept disasters and failures?

She accepts but rages when things go wrong, depending on the scale. She’s a “it’s not fair this isn’t fair why me I fucking hate this” kind of person. Can’t really move on easily, not after a looooong time.

36. Do they like to suffer? Like to see other people suffering?

She hates suffering, doesn’t care if others suffer

37. How is your character’s imagination? Daydreaming a lot? Worried most of the time? Living in memories?

She’s worried a lot, masked by her controlling attitude. But she can solve problems fairly quickly, so imaginative.

38. Are they basically negative when facing new things? Suspicious? Hostile? Scared? Enthusiastic?

She’s afraid but forces herself to. Suspicious but sometimes excited. Depends on what’s on the line.

39. What do they like to ridicule? What do they find stupid?

People’s whos opinions are run by emotions, or people that are lazy. She deems people with less as lazy.

40. How is their sense of humor? Do they have one?

She’s pretty funny, likes dark humor a lot

41. Is your character aware of who they are? Strengths? Weaknesses? Idiosyncrasies? Capable of self-irony?

She’s aware, kinda. But she thinks she’s justified, that it’s the worlds fault she’s the way she is, and does nothing to help herself grow

42. What does your character want most? What do they need really badly, compulsively? What are they willing to do, to sacrifice, to obtain?

She wants stability, control, and to know what’s coming next. She will do everything she can to get or keep what’s there, not sure of her boundaries. She’s adapted to the comfortable life, and she can’t live without it

43. Does your character have any secrets? If so, are they holding them back?

She kept secret that Morgan was her brother, once she found out. It emotionally held her back, because she thought of him as her brother and didn’t want him to die. Too bad he didn’t feel the same about her.

44. How badly do they want to obtain their life objectives? How do they pursue them?

She’s desperate. She grinded, worked hard and hurt whoever she had to.

45. Is your character pragmatic? Think first? Responsible? All action? A visionary? Passionate? Quixotic?

All action

46. Is your character tall? Short? What about size? Weight? Posture? How do they feel about their physical body?

She’s 5’8, 145 pounds, and she’s good with her body

47. Do they want to project an image of a younger, older, more important person? Does they want to be visible or invisible?

She wants to project the image of someone who is important and visible

48. How are your character’s gestures? Vigorous? Weak? Controlled? Compulsive? Energetic? Sluggish?

She gestures wildly yet with purpose, talks a lot with her hands. She has power in her movements.

49. What about voice? Pitch? Strength? Tempo and rhythm of speech? Pronunciation? Accent?

She has a deep voice, not losing softness no matter how loud she gets. She pronounces things with a more drawn out syllable to the end (“ wELL I knOW thAT”) Californian accent

50. What are the prevailing facial expressions? Sour? Cheerful? Dominating?

She has a quizzical look a lot and either looks disinterested or like she has something to say

[itsleeviyah]

A Reflection Paper on the Learners with Special Needs

Everyone was carefully and wonderfully made by God. He crafted the Earth for His most special creature, the human being. As years went by, the human race have become subject for studies because of the differences each human have in terms of physical aspects, talents, skills, capabilities as well as limitations and boundaries. In general, the human race is diverse. It maybe because of environmental-geophysical factors, influence, nature and genes.

Nevertheless, we are all equal to His eyes. We are given the heart to be equal in the society where opportunities are given whether you are physically capable or not.

In a classroom setting, too, a teacher cannot have a complete set of students with the same physique and capabilities. Each learner has its learning style, learning techniques and strategies that will help them enhance learning which is also based on their physical and mental capability. These all resorts to diversity of learners.

There are seven kinds of abilities or disabilities and diversity factors. They are the following: (1) Learners with self-care difficulty (2) Gifted and talented children (3) Learners with difficulty seeing (4) Learners with difficulty hearing (5) Learners with difficulty communicating (6) Learners with difficulty in walking and (7)  Learners with difficulty focusing and remembering.

Pre-service teacher like us must know the detailed information about the kind of learners which was mentioned to be able to adjust and include them in the normal classroom setting. As per mandate of the government that this learners should be given extra inclusion and care, they should have also the feeling of assurance that they will be taken care of in the classroom.

Learners with self-care difficulty

Children and youth with disabilities may need extra support to follow hygiene rules and routines. They may struggle reading social cues and knowing when to fix a hygiene issue such as smelly breath. Also, if a youth has a physical disability they may need extra help with personal care.

 Although parents are likely the main educators when it comes to hygiene and self-care, service providers can make a difference when they reinforce the messages given by parents. Service providers are in a unique position to support both parents and children/youth through the process of puberty. Consistent messages from both parents and service providers can make great impact when it comes to the management of hygiene and self-care. Hygiene is important for health but also for social reasons such as smelling and looking good. Good hygiene and self-care is considered to be a positive social quality and can help us feel good about ourselves.

 Gifted and Talented Children

Concept of Gifted Children The term ‘gifted’ and ‘talented’ are used interchangeably. The gifted child shows his excellence in performing some special tasks their behaviour in classroom is above average or very high. The psychologists have identified gifted children on the basis child show them best on any one ability is known as gifted child.            

The psychologists in various ways have defined the term ‘giftedness’ They have stated the term with help of intelligent quotient, social potentialities or social efficiency and also statistically. Some of the important definitions of ‘giftedness’: According to W.B. Kolesnik: “The term gifted has been applied to every child who, in this group is superior in some ability which may make him an outstanding contribution to the welfare and quality living, in our society.” However, this case may be difficult for him to conform the other students, the government shall have a curriculum suit for them.

According to an Australian School research 2019, Gifted and talented children have different learning needs from other children the same age. This is because they’re very curious, they learn quickly, and they like more complex ideas than other children their age. They don’t need to go over things as often as others do. And they’re often ready for activities, games, books and puzzles earlier than other children of the same age. Learning is important to the wellbeing of gifted and talented children. When you support your child’s learning in the areas that interest her, you’re also supporting her overall wellbeing. Support for your gifted child’s learning starts with noticing his strengths and natural abilities. When you know more about your child’s strengths and abilities, you can give her everyday experiences that offer new learning opportunities. This doesn’t have to be expensive – there are lots of homemade toys and free activities that can extend your child’s play and learning. When you’re choosing toys for younger children, you can look for things that encourage your child to play using imagination, creativity and problem-solving skills – for example, blocks, balls, cardboard boxes, dress-ups and crafty bits and pieces like coloured paper, washable markers, crayons and stickers. If you choose toys designed for older children, age recommendations are still important for safety – for example, some toys might contain small parts that toddlers could swallow. In these cases, it’s wise to follow the age recommendations, even when your child’s natural abilities are advanced beyond this age. Offering a range of learning opportunities will keep your child stimulated. It might also lead to him developing talents. For example, playing outdoors can prompt imagination and problem-solving, develop physical skills, and provide opportunities to play with others. Watching birds, learning about trees or collecting autumn leaves could be the start of a scientific interest. Reading books is a great way to answer your child’s questions, guide her learning and extend her interests. You can borrow books from your local library, or use the library’s online resources. You could also let family and friends know that books make great birthday presents for your child.

Learners with Difficulty Seeing

When you are teaching a visually impaired or blind student, it is important to clearly explain all visual materials. For example, if you are showing a picture to illustrate a point, you should describe the image. You should also get in the habit of dictating what you are writing on the chalkboard or whiteboard. This way students who are unable to see the board can still follow along with the material and take notes. Do not provide your students with a hand-out that contains assignment instructions. Visually impaired or blind students in your class may have difficulty seeing the words and learning what is expected. Instead, you should always give oral instructions for every assignment and activity.

Many classrooms rely on visual cues in order to ask questions or get the teacher’s attention. It is very traditional for students to raise their hand if they want to speak during a lesson. Visually impaired or blind students may not notice when their peers raise their hands. Instead, you should replace visual cues with audio cues. You should try and incorporate tactile learning experiences whenever possible. For example, instead of talking about rocks and showing images of different types of rocks, you should actually have physical rocks available in the classroom for the students to touch and handle.

 Learners with Difficulty Hearing

Packer (2018) said in her article for children with special needs, according to the Centers for Disease and Control (CDC), 1.3 out of 1000 8-year-olds have bilateral hearing loss (loss of hearing in both ears) of 40 decibels (dB) or more. And 14.9 percent of children between the ages of 6 and 19 have hearing loss of at least 16 dB in one or both ears. Even hearing loss in only one ear has a tremendous impact on school performance; research shows anywhere from 25 to 35 percent of children with unilateral hearing loss are at risk of failing at least one grade level.

Hearing ability is critical to speech and language development, communication and learning. Hearing loss causes delays in the development of speech and language, and those delays then lead to learning problems, often resulting in poor school performance. Unfortunately, since poor academic performance is often accompanied by inattention and sometimes poor behaviour, children with hearing loss are often misidentified as having learning disabilities such as ADD and ADHD.

According to the American Speech-Language Hearing Association (ASHA), children who have mild to moderate hearing loss but do not get intervention services are very likely to be behind their hearing peers by anywhere from one to four grade levels. And for those with more severe hearing loss, intervention services are even more crucial; those who do not receive intervention usually do not progress beyond the third-grade level.

The learners with difficulty hearing has given the special ability to be able to work using his eyes. As the old saying goes that a human has five senses and if one is lost, the others will reinforce. Customizing teaching strategies will help them learn. Teachers should encourage students with a hearing loss to seat themselves toward the front of the lecture and use assistive listening devices such as induction loops, hearing aids which may include transmitter/receiver systems with a clip-on microphone for the lecturer and provide written materials to supplement all lectures and tutorials.

Learners with Difficulty Communicating

Children with speech and language problems may have trouble sharing their thoughts with words or gestures. They may also have a hard time saying words clearly and understanding spoken or written language. Reading to the students and having her name objects in a book or read aloud to the teacher can strengthen her speech and language skills. When you read to the child, you are helping her brain to develop. Read the same story again and again. The repetition will help her learn language.

According to Psychology Today’s site, language disorder, as defined by the DSM-5, is marked by "persistent difficulties in the acquisition and use of language across modalities (i.e., spoken, written, sign language, or other) due to deficits in comprehension or production." Such deficits include limited vocabulary, limited ability to form sentences, and limited capacity to use language to communicate relative to what is expected for one's age.

Social (Pragmatic) Communication Disorder involves "difficulties in the social use of verbal and nonverbal communication," such as a lack of ability to alter communication to fit particular contexts (e.g., a classroom), to grasp normal rules of conversation, or to understand nonliteral meanings of language. Some of the symptoms are the following:

One category of speech disorder is dysfluency. 

Childhood-onset fluency disorder (formerly referred to as stuttering) is characterized by a disruption in the flow of speech and includes repetitions of speech sounds, hesitations before and during speaking, and/or prolongations of speech sounds.

Articulation difficulties are commonly found in people who have speech disorders. The term refers to problems forming and combining sounds, usually by omitting, distorting, or substituting them.

Voice disorders include difficulties with the quality, pitch, and loudness of the voice (prosody). Individuals with voice disorders may have trouble with the way their voices sound, and listeners may have trouble understanding a person with this speech pathology.

Auditory Processing (Hearing)

Central auditory processing disorder, as described by the International Statistical Classification of Diseases and Related Health Problems (ICD), is "characterized by impairment of the auditory processing, resulting in deficiencies in the recognition and interpretation of sounds by the brain." This disorder is not included in the DSM-5. The best way to approach treatment for a communication disorder is to focus on prevention and early intervention.

Parents should be aware of the typical age at which their child should be reaching each developmental milestone. "The first 3 years of life, when the brain is developing and maturing, is the most intensive period for acquiring speech and language skills," according to the National Institute on Deafness and Other Communication Disorders. By 4 to 6 months, a baby typically babbles in a manner that resembles speech, using a variety of sounds, and responds to changes in voice tone. After one year, it is normal for a child to, for example, understand some simple words for items, to communicate with physical gestures, and to use one or two words. From ages 1 to 2 and beyond, children regularly pick up new words and begin to use multiple words together.

If a parent has concerns about their child's speech or language development, they should talk to their family doctor, who may refer them to a speech-language pathologist trained to treat communication disorders. Treatment may involve interactive, communication-based activities for parent and child and, potentially, group or individual therapy.

Learners with Difficulty in Walking

Children with physical disabilities, once taught in separate classes and even separate schools, now learn beside their peers in regular classrooms. As types of physical disabilities vary in degree of impairment, teachers will find a general knowledge of various conditions and how they affect children helpful. Assistive technology can level the effects of these impairments by allowing students to participate in classroom activities more easily and independently. Specific classroom and instructional strategies, as well as accommodations and modifications, also assist students in achieving their best individual educational outcomes.

According to Australian Disability House’s site, there is a range of inclusive teaching strategies that can assist all students to learn but there are some specific strategies that are useful in teaching a group which includes students with physical impairment.

The fact that students have a mobility disability may not always be immediately apparent. Needs will vary, and difficulties may fluctuate. Some students will choose to disclose their disability; others will not. At your first lecture, you might invite any students who have a disability to contact you for a confidential discussion of their specific learning needs. You might also ask students what, if any, information would need to be shared with other members of staff, or with other students in the class. Below are some further suggestions:

·         Students who use wheelchairs, callipers or crutches, or who tire easily, may find it difficult moving about within the constraints of lecture timetables. Absence or lateness may be a result of the distance between teaching venues, so at the end of a lecture you may need to recap any information given at the beginning.

·         Check that academic activities which take place off-campus (such as industry visits, interviews or fieldwork) are accessible to people with a mobility disability. Consider supplementary laboratory practical, films or videos as alternative options to field trips.

·         Students with a mobility disability may sometimes wish to use their own furniture, such as ergonomic chairs or sloped writing tables. Extra space may need to be created in teaching rooms, but this should be done unobtrusively.

·         Some students with back problems may prefer to stand in lectures or classes, rather than sit.

·         Some students may need to use a tape recorder or note-taker in lectures. Extra time is involved in processing information acquired in this way. It is common practice in some departments to routinely tape all lectures. This is a practice which will assist a variety of students, including those who may be absent from time to time because of their disability.

·         Students may need extensions to deadlines for work involving locating and using library resources. Provide reading lists well before the start of a course so that reading can begin early.

·         Academic isolation may be an issue for students who are unable to participate in some class activities. One-to-one sessions with a tutor may help fill this gap in participation.

 Speaking from experience since I had a classmate, a friend and neighbour whom are in wheelchairs, they have difficulty, actually almost all school activities especially in early education where physical activities could cause euphoria and much learning. However, to control such and to accommodate them properly, everyone in the class should customize their activities.

Learners with Difficulty Focusing and Remembering

For the students to take everything slowly to grasp a lesson, he may use the technique in breaking down tasks into smaller more manageable chunks – dividing up questions/tasks between pairs/groups and then asking learners to share their answers with each other encourages collaboration and peer support. Keep the classroom a clutter free zone. Remove any unnecessary notices and posters from the walls as they will only add to distraction. The teacher may let the student play memory/concentration games can help students learn to focus better and longer.

To address problems in memory and to enhance memory skills, Loveless (2018) in Education Corner suggested effective memory strategies for students with special needs.

Mnemonics is a learning strategy where students associate familiar words, rhyming words or phrases, or songs with terms they're struggling to remember.

Rote Practice Exercises is used. Repetition is one of the best ways to learn and retain new information, so teachers should constantly review concepts with students struggling with memory loss problems. Teachers can create drills students can complete on their own, or conduct drills with the entire class. Whatever strategies teachers employ, if they repetitively review curriculum in their classrooms, students will retain more information.

After students become familiar with a concept, they can further their knowledge through hands-on learning. For example, students can learn about an insect and then conduct a dissection to study its anatomy. Students can also learn about a historical event that occurred in their community and then tour a historical site associated with it.

One of the best things you can do to help with memory is to take your time and present information as slowly as possible. Give the child time to fully process a small chunk of information before you add onto it. This may mean having to review the material several times before moving forward, but getting that information to find a place in the long-term memory will help greatly. Much of what we teach children is based on previously learned concepts. This is especially true with math.

Recommendations

When a child has an impairment of one of his senses, as a teacher, make sure to make use of his other senses well because it all works together for it to fulfil the duty of the impaired ones. I recommend to have a research that could make an innovation of instructional materials with the use of technology as what we called Assistive Technology so that it will be easy for them to help themselves and even their assistants to learn.

For students will difficulty seeing, the teacher may not always use gadgets and presentations that uses light or radiation. It would be harmful for their health. Traditional ways of presenting outputs, giving oral and less visual instructions or hand-outs may help them catch up with learning.

“Never discourage anyone...who continually makes progress, no matter how slow.”−Plato

 #credits to the sites I got information from

[midwestregister]

Building Resiliency in Teens: Why Learning How to Cope with Adversity Can Boost Emotional Readiness for College (and Life)

Originally posted on Caron

If you or someone you know is suffering from or at risk of an alcohol addiction, take the next step and reach out to a Caron specialist at 877-920-4849 or contact us online. 

The college years can be an emotionally and physically demanding time. Three out of four college students say they’re stressed, according to a recent study of 67,000 college students. Worse, one in five of these students reported thoughts of suicide, while one in 10 had attempted it. This is twice the national average for adults!

Coupled with this is the dropout rate. Less than 40% of first-time students entering a four-year college graduate after four years with a degree. After six years, only 52% will have earned a degree. Success at college is not guaranteed.

I work closely with students in high school and college who struggle with the transition to college. Always, parents are eager to know, “Is my child ready for college? How can I help prepare them?”

There is no easy answer to that question. Many students experience difficulties with this life change, but some are better able to handle that transition than others. I find that emotional readiness and resilience are the best predictors of success in college and in life. The reality is that life is bound to be stressful, and teens and young adults must have the skills necessary to thrive in the face of inevitable challenges.

The fear of failure prevents growth Parenting plays a significant role in a child’s development of emotional readiness and resiliency skills. Research shows that by the time a child reaches adolescence, his or her need to feel “secure and safe” transfers from the parental relationship to social peer relationships. There is also a shift during that time to more independence and reliance on themselves. The challenge is that it doesn’t always happen smoothly and can leave many young people with an emotional deficit.

In fact, the tried-and-true method for developing resiliency is surviving something difficult, growing from it and becoming stronger as a result. The impediment to emotional growth comes when a child is prevented from experiencing adversity, or if fear of “failure” prevents them from facing the challenge and learning from it.

Let me take a step back for a moment and talk about that dreaded concept – failure. It’s a scary word that evokes an immediate reaction for many. Failure doesn’t actually exist in the outside world. In fact, failure is a personal emotional response – a feeling you get when you don’t live up to your own expectations. Or when you feel like you’ve haven’t lived up to someone else’s expectations.

It’s helpful to think of success or failure within the framework of intrinsic goals versus extrinsic goals. Extrinsic goals are the ways we measure our success based on outcomes like admittance to a good college, having an impressive resume and getting good SAT scores. Intrinsic goals make us feel fulfilled and useful and inspire us. The more we focus on those extrinsic goals to the exclusion of the intrinsic goals, the more likely we are to feel emotional distress when the extrinsic goals don’t turn out exactly as we hoped.

The fear of failure presents most frequently as anxiety. It taps into our primitive flight-or-fight response. Our heart starts pounding, our adrenaline surges, and our mind starts racing. We’re prepared to run from the lion, but there is no lion.

Today’s overwhelming focus on the extrinsic goals is now leading to a rise of anxiety among adolescents. They feel more pressure to perform while, at the same time, they’ve had less experience at a young age taking risks, coping with disappointment and learning to solve problems on their own. There’s more dependence on family than there once was, whether that’s for economic reasons or just new approaches to parenting. Part of it is also likely due to social media, because it isolates people in a way that they don’t have to experience as much face-to-face discomfort.

The good news is that parents can help their children by letting them experience small difficulties in their lives without an immediate intervention and by teaching them healthy approaches to managing challenges from an early age, so they are equipped with resilience skills.

Anxiety during the college admissions process It’s important for parents to be aware that the process of college admissions and college transition is just as much an emotional process as it is an academic one. Just as parents hire college advisors and college counselors to help students improve their test scores, it may be worthwhile for parents to seek therapeutic support to help their child become emotionally ready.

The process of applying to college triggers a lot of anxiety for students. Parents should be alert for potential problem behaviors:

How does our child seem during this period?

Are we noticing changes in their behavior?

How are their sleeping habits?

What are their eating habits?

How are they interacting with their siblings or with us?

How are their relationships with their peers?

Warning signs of deeper trouble might include:

Substance use

Eating disorders

Withdrawal from friends or loved ones

Low energy and interest in favorite activities

Poor grades

Changing the narrative can boost emotional resilience Often, students get wrapped up in the beliefs they have about themselves. One student I was tutoring for the SAT approached the test thinking, “I’m so bad at tests. Ever since I was little, I’ve never been as smart as my classmates. Forget this. I’m just not even going to try.” I could sit with him and see he wasn’t even really reading the questions, because he already had this story in his mind. Before we could even address the geometry questions, we first had to challenge the beliefs he had about himself and develop new ones.

Even the appearance of success may not accurately reflect a young person’s emotional readiness. I recently had a client who was very high achieving – high IQ, highly motivated. That was where she found a lot of her self-worth. When she got into an Ivy League college, she was surrounded by people who were just as accomplished. She was no longer getting straight As, but Bs or even Cs. This caused so much distress that she came home after her first semester and took a semester off. If she wasn’t the smartest kid, then who was she? This was her moment of adversity, and it rocked her whole world. But out of this experience, she had an opportunity to learn what she was good at and what really excited her. Taking a step back and working on appreciating her authentic self gave her the emotional tools and perspective to move forward.

Ultimately, I encourage parents to strive for balance and help their children understand the difference between external rewards and internal fulfillment. You need both to succeed at college and at life. Accomplishing goals is important, but equally important is developing satisfaction from being present and feeling good enough about who you are right now, without expectations.

About Caron – Atlanta Outpatient Treatment Center

Atlanta is a cultural and business hub to some of the world’s biggest organizations. Coca-Cola, CNN and The Home Depot are just some of the multinational companies based here. Although Atlanta is booming, this city struggles with a drug epidemic, one that impacts hundreds of thousands of people every day. Its citizens rely on much-needed drug and alcohol rehab centers to provide the local population with recovery and support services.

Contact Caron – Atlanta Outpatient Treatment Center

1200 Ashwood Parkway Suite 125 Atlanta GA 30338 United States

678-543-5718

Website: https://www.caron.org/locations/caron-atlanta

The post Building Resiliency in Teens: Why Learning How to Cope with Adversity Can Boost Emotional Readiness for College (and Life) appeared first on Midwest.

from WordPress https://ift.tt/3aMg9l4 via Midwest Register

[allthetimenews]

Building Resiliency in Teens: Why Learning How to Cope with Adversity Can Boost Emotional Readiness for College (and Life)

Originally posted on Caron

If you or someone you know is suffering from or at risk of an alcohol addiction, take the next step and reach out to a Caron specialist at 877-920-4849 or contact us online. 

The college years can be an emotionally and physically demanding time. Three out of four college students say they’re stressed, according to a recent study of 67,000 college students. Worse, one in five of these students reported thoughts of suicide, while one in 10 had attempted it. This is twice the national average for adults!

Coupled with this is the dropout rate. Less than 40% of first-time students entering a four-year college graduate after four years with a degree. After six years, only 52% will have earned a degree. Success at college is not guaranteed.

I work closely with students in high school and college who struggle with the transition to college. Always, parents are eager to know, “Is my child ready for college? How can I help prepare them?”

There is no easy answer to that question. Many students experience difficulties with this life change, but some are better able to handle that transition than others. I find that emotional readiness and resilience are the best predictors of success in college and in life. The reality is that life is bound to be stressful, and teens and young adults must have the skills necessary to thrive in the face of inevitable challenges.

The fear of failure prevents growth Parenting plays a significant role in a child’s development of emotional readiness and resiliency skills. Research shows that by the time a child reaches adolescence, his or her need to feel “secure and safe” transfers from the parental relationship to social peer relationships. There is also a shift during that time to more independence and reliance on themselves. The challenge is that it doesn’t always happen smoothly and can leave many young people with an emotional deficit.

In fact, the tried-and-true method for developing resiliency is surviving something difficult, growing from it and becoming stronger as a result. The impediment to emotional growth comes when a child is prevented from experiencing adversity, or if fear of “failure” prevents them from facing the challenge and learning from it.

Let me take a step back for a moment and talk about that dreaded concept – failure. It’s a scary word that evokes an immediate reaction for many. Failure doesn’t actually exist in the outside world. In fact, failure is a personal emotional response – a feeling you get when you don’t live up to your own expectations. Or when you feel like you’ve haven’t lived up to someone else’s expectations.

It’s helpful to think of success or failure within the framework of intrinsic goals versus extrinsic goals. Extrinsic goals are the ways we measure our success based on outcomes like admittance to a good college, having an impressive resume and getting good SAT scores. Intrinsic goals make us feel fulfilled and useful and inspire us. The more we focus on those extrinsic goals to the exclusion of the intrinsic goals, the more likely we are to feel emotional distress when the extrinsic goals don’t turn out exactly as we hoped.

The fear of failure presents most frequently as anxiety. It taps into our primitive flight-or-fight response. Our heart starts pounding, our adrenaline surges, and our mind starts racing. We’re prepared to run from the lion, but there is no lion.

Today’s overwhelming focus on the extrinsic goals is now leading to a rise of anxiety among adolescents. They feel more pressure to perform while, at the same time, they’ve had less experience at a young age taking risks, coping with disappointment and learning to solve problems on their own. There’s more dependence on family than there once was, whether that’s for economic reasons or just new approaches to parenting. Part of it is also likely due to social media, because it isolates people in a way that they don’t have to experience as much face-to-face discomfort.

The good news is that parents can help their children by letting them experience small difficulties in their lives without an immediate intervention and by teaching them healthy approaches to managing challenges from an early age, so they are equipped with resilience skills.

Anxiety during the college admissions process It’s important for parents to be aware that the process of college admissions and college transition is just as much an emotional process as it is an academic one. Just as parents hire college advisors and college counselors to help students improve their test scores, it may be worthwhile for parents to seek therapeutic support to help their child become emotionally ready.

The process of applying to college triggers a lot of anxiety for students. Parents should be alert for potential problem behaviors:

How does our child seem during this period?

Are we noticing changes in their behavior?

How are their sleeping habits?

What are their eating habits?

How are they interacting with their siblings or with us?

How are their relationships with their peers?

Warning signs of deeper trouble might include:

Substance use

Eating disorders

Withdrawal from friends or loved ones

Low energy and interest in favorite activities

Poor grades

Changing the narrative can boost emotional resilience Often, students get wrapped up in the beliefs they have about themselves. One student I was tutoring for the SAT approached the test thinking, “I’m so bad at tests. Ever since I was little, I’ve never been as smart as my classmates. Forget this. I’m just not even going to try.” I could sit with him and see he wasn’t even really reading the questions, because he already had this story in his mind. Before we could even address the geometry questions, we first had to challenge the beliefs he had about himself and develop new ones.

Even the appearance of success may not accurately reflect a young person’s emotional readiness. I recently had a client who was very high achieving – high IQ, highly motivated. That was where she found a lot of her self-worth. When she got into an Ivy League college, she was surrounded by people who were just as accomplished. She was no longer getting straight As, but Bs or even Cs. This caused so much distress that she came home after her first semester and took a semester off. If she wasn’t the smartest kid, then who was she? This was her moment of adversity, and it rocked her whole world. But out of this experience, she had an opportunity to learn what she was good at and what really excited her. Taking a step back and working on appreciating her authentic self gave her the emotional tools and perspective to move forward.

Ultimately, I encourage parents to strive for balance and help their children understand the difference between external rewards and internal fulfillment. You need both to succeed at college and at life. Accomplishing goals is important, but equally important is developing satisfaction from being present and feeling good enough about who you are right now, without expectations.

About Caron – Pennsylvania Addiction Treatment

The first thing you might notice when you arrive at Caron Pennsylvania is the inspirational view from our private, mountaintop locale. Even more inspiring are the many success stories of patients and families who come here to start fresh. Caron Pennsylvania blends addiction rehab and behavioral health treatment with the latest evidence-based practices and historically proven treatment modalities. We believe our success is grounded in our ability to apply a multi-disciplinary, integrated approach to true healing for every individual and family we treat.

Contact Caron – Pennsylvania Addiction Treatment

243 N Galen Hall Rd Wernersville Pennsylvania 19565 United States

800-854-6023

Website: https://www.caron.org/locations/caron-pennsylvania

The post Building Resiliency in Teens: Why Learning How to Cope with Adversity Can Boost Emotional Readiness for College (and Life) appeared first on AllTheTimeNews.

from WordPress https://ift.tt/2VHD4d6 via All The Time News

[newstvstation]

Building Resiliency in Teens: Why Learning How to Cope with Adversity Can Boost Emotional Readiness for College (and Life)

Originally posted on Caron

If you or someone you know is suffering from or at risk of an alcohol addiction, take the next step and reach out to a Caron specialist at 877-920-4849 or contact us online. 

The college years can be an emotionally and physically demanding time. Three out of four college students say they’re stressed, according to a recent study of 67,000 college students. Worse, one in five of these students reported thoughts of suicide, while one in 10 had attempted it. This is twice the national average for adults!

Coupled with this is the dropout rate. Less than 40% of first-time students entering a four-year college graduate after four years with a degree. After six years, only 52% will have earned a degree. Success at college is not guaranteed.

I work closely with students in high school and college who struggle with the transition to college. Always, parents are eager to know, “Is my child ready for college? How can I help prepare them?”

There is no easy answer to that question. Many students experience difficulties with this life change, but some are better able to handle that transition than others. I find that emotional readiness and resilience are the best predictors of success in college and in life. The reality is that life is bound to be stressful, and teens and young adults must have the skills necessary to thrive in the face of inevitable challenges.

The fear of failure prevents growth Parenting plays a significant role in a child’s development of emotional readiness and resiliency skills. Research shows that by the time a child reaches adolescence, his or her need to feel “secure and safe” transfers from the parental relationship to social peer relationships. There is also a shift during that time to more independence and reliance on themselves. The challenge is that it doesn’t always happen smoothly and can leave many young people with an emotional deficit.

In fact, the tried-and-true method for developing resiliency is surviving something difficult, growing from it and becoming stronger as a result. The impediment to emotional growth comes when a child is prevented from experiencing adversity, or if fear of “failure” prevents them from facing the challenge and learning from it.

Let me take a step back for a moment and talk about that dreaded concept – failure. It’s a scary word that evokes an immediate reaction for many. Failure doesn’t actually exist in the outside world. In fact, failure is a personal emotional response – a feeling you get when you don’t live up to your own expectations. Or when you feel like you’ve haven’t lived up to someone else’s expectations.

It’s helpful to think of success or failure within the framework of intrinsic goals versus extrinsic goals. Extrinsic goals are the ways we measure our success based on outcomes like admittance to a good college, having an impressive resume and getting good SAT scores. Intrinsic goals make us feel fulfilled and useful and inspire us. The more we focus on those extrinsic goals to the exclusion of the intrinsic goals, the more likely we are to feel emotional distress when the extrinsic goals don’t turn out exactly as we hoped.

The fear of failure presents most frequently as anxiety. It taps into our primitive flight-or-fight response. Our heart starts pounding, our adrenaline surges, and our mind starts racing. We’re prepared to run from the lion, but there is no lion.

Today’s overwhelming focus on the extrinsic goals is now leading to a rise of anxiety among adolescents. They feel more pressure to perform while, at the same time, they’ve had less experience at a young age taking risks, coping with disappointment and learning to solve problems on their own. There’s more dependence on family than there once was, whether that’s for economic reasons or just new approaches to parenting. Part of it is also likely due to social media, because it isolates people in a way that they don’t have to experience as much face-to-face discomfort.

The good news is that parents can help their children by letting them experience small difficulties in their lives without an immediate intervention and by teaching them healthy approaches to managing challenges from an early age, so they are equipped with resilience skills.

Anxiety during the college admissions process It’s important for parents to be aware that the process of college admissions and college transition is just as much an emotional process as it is an academic one. Just as parents hire college advisors and college counselors to help students improve their test scores, it may be worthwhile for parents to seek therapeutic support to help their child become emotionally ready.

The process of applying to college triggers a lot of anxiety for students. Parents should be alert for potential problem behaviors:

How does our child seem during this period?

Are we noticing changes in their behavior?

How are their sleeping habits?

What are their eating habits?

How are they interacting with their siblings or with us?

How are their relationships with their peers?

Warning signs of deeper trouble might include:

Substance use

Eating disorders

Withdrawal from friends or loved ones

Low energy and interest in favorite activities

Poor grades

Changing the narrative can boost emotional resilience Often, students get wrapped up in the beliefs they have about themselves. One student I was tutoring for the SAT approached the test thinking, “I’m so bad at tests. Ever since I was little, I’ve never been as smart as my classmates. Forget this. I’m just not even going to try.” I could sit with him and see he wasn’t even really reading the questions, because he already had this story in his mind. Before we could even address the geometry questions, we first had to challenge the beliefs he had about himself and develop new ones.

Even the appearance of success may not accurately reflect a young person’s emotional readiness. I recently had a client who was very high achieving – high IQ, highly motivated. That was where she found a lot of her self-worth. When she got into an Ivy League college, she was surrounded by people who were just as accomplished. She was no longer getting straight As, but Bs or even Cs. This caused so much distress that she came home after her first semester and took a semester off. If she wasn’t the smartest kid, then who was she? This was her moment of adversity, and it rocked her whole world. But out of this experience, she had an opportunity to learn what she was good at and what really excited her. Taking a step back and working on appreciating her authentic self gave her the emotional tools and perspective to move forward.

Ultimately, I encourage parents to strive for balance and help their children understand the difference between external rewards and internal fulfillment. You need both to succeed at college and at life. Accomplishing goals is important, but equally important is developing satisfaction from being present and feeling good enough about who you are right now, without expectations.

About Smiley Drain

Smiley Drain opened our doors on January, 2020. Our ideology is straightforward, listen closely to the client, answer your questions and provide the you with absolute best service experience.

Contact Smiley Drain

21 Central Ave Unit R Caldwell New Jersey 07006 United States

(973) 764-5393

Website: https://smileydrain.com

The post Building Resiliency in Teens: Why Learning How to Cope with Adversity Can Boost Emotional Readiness for College (and Life) appeared first on News TV Station.

from WordPress https://ift.tt/2VJDOx7 via News TV Station

[dailyposttribune]

Building Resiliency in Teens: Why Learning How to Cope with Adversity Can Boost Emotional Readiness for College (and Life)

Originally posted on Caron

If you or someone you know is suffering from or at risk of an alcohol addiction, take the next step and reach out to a Caron specialist at 877-920-4849 or contact us online. 

The college years can be an emotionally and physically demanding time. Three out of four college students say they’re stressed, according to a recent study of 67,000 college students. Worse, one in five of these students reported thoughts of suicide, while one in 10 had attempted it. This is twice the national average for adults!

Coupled with this is the dropout rate. Less than 40% of first-time students entering a four-year college graduate after four years with a degree. After six years, only 52% will have earned a degree. Success at college is not guaranteed.

I work closely with students in high school and college who struggle with the transition to college. Always, parents are eager to know, “Is my child ready for college? How can I help prepare them?”

There is no easy answer to that question. Many students experience difficulties with this life change, but some are better able to handle that transition than others. I find that emotional readiness and resilience are the best predictors of success in college and in life. The reality is that life is bound to be stressful, and teens and young adults must have the skills necessary to thrive in the face of inevitable challenges.

The fear of failure prevents growth Parenting plays a significant role in a child’s development of emotional readiness and resiliency skills. Research shows that by the time a child reaches adolescence, his or her need to feel “secure and safe” transfers from the parental relationship to social peer relationships. There is also a shift during that time to more independence and reliance on themselves. The challenge is that it doesn’t always happen smoothly and can leave many young people with an emotional deficit.

In fact, the tried-and-true method for developing resiliency is surviving something difficult, growing from it and becoming stronger as a result. The impediment to emotional growth comes when a child is prevented from experiencing adversity, or if fear of “failure” prevents them from facing the challenge and learning from it.

Let me take a step back for a moment and talk about that dreaded concept – failure. It’s a scary word that evokes an immediate reaction for many. Failure doesn’t actually exist in the outside world. In fact, failure is a personal emotional response – a feeling you get when you don’t live up to your own expectations. Or when you feel like you’ve haven’t lived up to someone else’s expectations.

It’s helpful to think of success or failure within the framework of intrinsic goals versus extrinsic goals. Extrinsic goals are the ways we measure our success based on outcomes like admittance to a good college, having an impressive resume and getting good SAT scores. Intrinsic goals make us feel fulfilled and useful and inspire us. The more we focus on those extrinsic goals to the exclusion of the intrinsic goals, the more likely we are to feel emotional distress when the extrinsic goals don’t turn out exactly as we hoped.

The fear of failure presents most frequently as anxiety. It taps into our primitive flight-or-fight response. Our heart starts pounding, our adrenaline surges, and our mind starts racing. We’re prepared to run from the lion, but there is no lion.

Today’s overwhelming focus on the extrinsic goals is now leading to a rise of anxiety among adolescents. They feel more pressure to perform while, at the same time, they’ve had less experience at a young age taking risks, coping with disappointment and learning to solve problems on their own. There’s more dependence on family than there once was, whether that’s for economic reasons or just new approaches to parenting. Part of it is also likely due to social media, because it isolates people in a way that they don’t have to experience as much face-to-face discomfort.

The good news is that parents can help their children by letting them experience small difficulties in their lives without an immediate intervention and by teaching them healthy approaches to managing challenges from an early age, so they are equipped with resilience skills.

Anxiety during the college admissions process It’s important for parents to be aware that the process of college admissions and college transition is just as much an emotional process as it is an academic one. Just as parents hire college advisors and college counselors to help students improve their test scores, it may be worthwhile for parents to seek therapeutic support to help their child become emotionally ready.

The process of applying to college triggers a lot of anxiety for students. Parents should be alert for potential problem behaviors:

How does our child seem during this period?

Are we noticing changes in their behavior?

How are their sleeping habits?

What are their eating habits?

How are they interacting with their siblings or with us?

How are their relationships with their peers?

Warning signs of deeper trouble might include:

Substance use

Eating disorders

Withdrawal from friends or loved ones

Low energy and interest in favorite activities

Poor grades

Changing the narrative can boost emotional resilience Often, students get wrapped up in the beliefs they have about themselves. One student I was tutoring for the SAT approached the test thinking, “I’m so bad at tests. Ever since I was little, I’ve never been as smart as my classmates. Forget this. I’m just not even going to try.” I could sit with him and see he wasn’t even really reading the questions, because he already had this story in his mind. Before we could even address the geometry questions, we first had to challenge the beliefs he had about himself and develop new ones.

Even the appearance of success may not accurately reflect a young person’s emotional readiness. I recently had a client who was very high achieving – high IQ, highly motivated. That was where she found a lot of her self-worth. When she got into an Ivy League college, she was surrounded by people who were just as accomplished. She was no longer getting straight As, but Bs or even Cs. This caused so much distress that she came home after her first semester and took a semester off. If she wasn’t the smartest kid, then who was she? This was her moment of adversity, and it rocked her whole world. But out of this experience, she had an opportunity to learn what she was good at and what really excited her. Taking a step back and working on appreciating her authentic self gave her the emotional tools and perspective to move forward.

Ultimately, I encourage parents to strive for balance and help their children understand the difference between external rewards and internal fulfillment. You need both to succeed at college and at life. Accomplishing goals is important, but equally important is developing satisfaction from being present and feeling good enough about who you are right now, without expectations.

About Towing Company Sunrise

At Towing Company Sunrise, we offer years of experience in our industry. Everyone on our staff is a veteran in the field of towing. Our experts respond to each call with the same urgency as if they were towing for family. We will continue to redefine what it means to be towing experts and tow truck drivers, continuously setting new standards for ultimate satisfaction to each valued customer we serve.

Contact Towing Company Sunrise

8020 NW 27th St Sunrise, Broward County Florida 33322 United States

(954) 271-2348

Website: http://towingcompanysunrise.com/

The post Building Resiliency in Teens: Why Learning How to Cope with Adversity Can Boost Emotional Readiness for College (and Life) appeared first on Daily Post Tribune.

from WordPress https://ift.tt/2ROEVKE via Daily Post Tribune