#and the best way to cope as an angsty teen

[chloesimaginationthings]

FNAF teen Michael tries to cheer up teen Vanny,,

[ljaylmaoo]

🎃Kinktober day 4- Hate Sex🎃

ExBf!Hook x ExGf!Fem!reader 18+

UNEDITED!!

warnings: SMUT!!, ANGST!!, this is EXTREMELY TOXIC!!!, mentions of safe word, mentions of cheating(?), and mentions of underage drinking (drink responsibly), reader is a hoe/slut/whatever term you wanna use for it lol, unprotected sex (PLEASE USE CONDOMS), squirting, creampie, etc!!!

an: tbh I didn’t think it would get this angsty or this long lol, idk if I like the way this one turned out, but yea, enjoy..? Lol also, there is a change of pov so sorry ab that lol

word count: 3.4k

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“Where the hell is she?!” Uliana barked at the four teens who were scattered about the Cauldron in the centre of the table, a dangerous maniacal expression visible across her face as she glanced around frantically at the others. The VKs were about to pull off possibly their biggest prank yet, maybe bigger than the prank they successfully pulled on the previously known sweet, pink, and ‘adorable’ princess two years ago. “Successful” meaning after the school year, she never came back to school and has since disappeared back down the rabbit hole to Wonderland, never to be heard from again. Was it harsh? Yeah. But did the VKs care? Not one bit. The prank had finally made them get the “respect” they deserved, or… believed they deserved from the students at Merlin Academy, and that’s all that mattered most to Uliana. This sent them on an extreme power trip and only craving more fear from their peers, so Uliana wanted to do something bigger, a prank on the entire school. Y/n was the one who came up with the idea of the prank and Uliana loved it. But of course, on the day of the prank that Y/n came up with, she was late once again. It wasn’t new for her to be running late no matter how important the day may be, and that wasn’t what initially pissed Uliana off, but it was now for the same reason: an extremely late night booty call that would result in her sleeping in and usually missing first period at the very least.

This “phase” of hers started ever since she and Hook had broken up about 4 months ago. It was a messy break up to say the least, and it was her way of coping. Hook absolutely hated it, and it hurt him more to know that the only way she could cope was to have a different guy in her bed every night just to boost her own confidence and self esteem that he wrecked which had earned her the title MA school slut. Every time he saw her now, there would be a new hickey or a bruise that was visible from how rough the guy treated her and used her body in any way he wanted. She knew they were visible, she made sure of it, because she knew it would piss him off and also because she didn’t care. It was like a physical symbol of how damaged she was emotionally and mentally. But as much as he wanted to say something about it, it wasn’t his place, not anymore. So his true feelings for her deep down that made him concerned and pity her turned to hatred and anger, bubbling within every time he saw her at the fact that he had to bite his tongue about it and act as if he didn’t care. Their friends however couldn’t care less about what she did with her life, or body, and most of them didn’t. But when it was all they heard Uliana complain and bitch about on a daily basis is when they began to grow tired of it as well.

Because they shared the same friend group, they had no choice but to keep hanging around each other and it was awkward for the group the first few weeks with the two ignoring and trying their best to stay out of each others way, but eventually Hook came to terms with the fact that they had to stay in each others lives wether they liked it or not. He knew what he did to her was wrong and he did feel bad, but no matter what he said or did to try and make up with her (for their friends sake), it never worked. Y/n was having an extremely difficult time with coming to terms with it, she would have an attitude towards him and would never give him any time of day. She made it known that she didn’t like him and wanted nothing to do with him anymore, especially after what he did to her. The rare times they actually did talk (which was almost never), they bickered and threw small insults at each other.

Hades and Maleficent only shrugged, frowning as they did so, uninterested. Uliana groaned and mumbled something under her breath about how useless they were before turning to the boy on her right who was currently stood with his arms crossed like he would rather be anywhere else but there. He slowly looked over at her and gave her a dirty look, “What?” He questioned, a hint of attitude lingering in his voice. She shook her head in disbelief, scoffing, “uh hello? Go get her!” She snapped at him while pointing towards the entrance of the lair. “Wha- no? Why me?” He asked bewildered. “Because all you’re doing is standing there looking pretty, make yourself useful, Hook!” She hissed while coming closer towards him in a threatening manner. He leaned back as she came closer to him completely invading his personal space, “no, I’m okay actually. She’s not my responsibility.”

“Yeah, but you’re the reason why she’s been acting like this.” Maleficent smirked as she took Uli’s side. Hook gave her a look and back to Uli who raised her eyebrows in agreement.

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Hook stood on the outside of her dorm waiting impatiently for her to answer the door, knocking for what seemed to be the millionth time (really, it was more like 5). “Leave me alone!” He heard your voice yell from the other side. He doesn’t know why he constantly let Uliana boss him around, but alas here he was again, this time letting her force him into being his ex girlfriend’s personal alarm clock. He found it embarrassing, glaring at the few students who passed by. Part of him wanted to say fuck it and leave, but he knew Uliana would throw a hissy fit if she saw that he didn’t come back with Y/n. So, contemplating on what to do, he decided to barge in her dorm as any fucks he gave before drained out of him, he was sick of it.

It was dark and the smell of sex lingered in the air, clothes trailed on the ground that led to the bed where she was buried under the large, soft sheets with a mountain of pillows scattered around her head. He instantly went over to the window and ripped open the curtains, sunlight instantly flooding in and lighting up the room. Y/n groaned and pulled the duvet over her head, “get out!” “I would love to, trust me. But-“ “James?” Y/n peeked over the blankets in confusion and made eye contact with the pirate who was stood by the window. “Yeah..hi.” Y/n furrowed her eyebrows and slowly sat up, rubbing her eyes. Before she could say anything, another head from beside her shot up in alarm and looked at him, “shit. Uh, I’m just gonna..” he quickly threw the covers off and frantically put his shirt back on, James watching him with a judgmental look as the guy grabbed the rest of his clothes and shoes off the ground and ran out in only his shirt and underwear, slamming the door shut behind him, leaving the two alone in an uncomfortable silence.

James cleared his throat, “…um, sorry for scaring away your, friend…” he said awkwardly but also uninterested. Y/n shook her head, “It’s fine. I didn’t like him anyways. He was kind of an asshole. But, what the fuck are you doing here in my dorm?” She questioned, the drowsiness slowly clearing up around her head. “Uliana threatened me to come get you. I didn’t mean to intrude but I am not leaving here without you.” The girl raised an eyebrow and scoffed, “yeah… no. I’m not leaving here with you. I’d rather chug a gallon of poison.” Hook shrugged, “I wish that was an option, but really, Y/n. I’m protecting us both from Uli. So I suggest you get your ass up now and get ready before I drag you out of here myself.” He said in a stern and threatening tone. She crossed her arms and stayed in place in an attempt to protest against him, “now.” He repeated, when she saw the look on his face she knew he wasn’t joking. She groaned and threw the covers off and finally got up, beginning to walk over to her closet. Hooks eyes widened when he saw that she was completely naked, with only a small thong that covered little to nothing. It also just happened to be his favourite she’d wear to tease him with when they were together. His eyes traced her figure, the small bruises and marks on her chest and ass making him fill with rage. He didn’t know if it was because they were from someone who didn’t actually care about her and was just another scumbag who was simply using her for her body, or because they weren’t from him. Both perhaps..?

“I can feel you staring.” She said annoyed while she finished putting her top on, glancing over to him that sat across the room leaned up against her desk. He made eye contact with her and she saw the angered and unimpressed look on his face, “what?” He rolled his eyes and looked away, “nothing. I just don’t know why you let guys who don’t give a shit about you treat you like that.” She threw the pants she picked out over her arm and turned to him, biting her cheek before scoffing, “treat me like what?” He turned to her and mirrored her body language, crossing his arms, “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to offend you, darling.” he laughed bitterly tilting his head slightly, blinking innocently, “I just don’t know why you’re acting like this and allowing yourself to get treated and used up like some fucking slutty ass cum dump.” Y/n’s mouth dropped at his sudden cruel bluntness. She knew he was right, and she was well aware of how she was acting. But no one has ever “cared” enough to be that straight up and call her out on it to her face. But it was his fault.

She looked away and shook her head in disbelief, tongue poking the inside of her cheek with a dangerous breathy laugh, “okay you really wanna start this now?” She started, walking up to him slowly and throwing her pants on the ground, “you’re really asking me why I’m acting like this? Why do you care what I’m doing with my life all of a sudden after we broke up?” Hook sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “Y/n. I’m not trying to argue. I’m just saying it’s really unhealthy and you shouldn’t be-“ “oh! So it was completely fine for you to be doing the same thing while we were together?” Y/n questioned while throwing her hands to the side, “it was one time! I was drunk and I hardly even remember it!” “Oh fuck off! It doesn’t matter whether you were drunk or not! Being intoxicated doesn’t excuse you for acting like a man whore all night at the only party I wasn’t able to make!” She took a deep breath, “and with the one girl you told me not to worry about? Really?” Tears pricked in her eyes as her voice cracked at the end of her speech while she yelled in his face.

“You don’t think I feel bad about it?! You should be glad I even told you the truth about the kiss in the first place!” The two went back and forth, screaming at each other as unexpected tears streamed down their faces. Hook backed her into the wall as he angrily expressed his frustration and feelings, “-and gods sake for the millionth time Y/n I said I’m fucking sorry!” He cried out their faces were now inches away from each other, out of breath and eye brows furrowed as they stared into each other’s eyes mixed with hatred and rage. In the heat of the moment, they suddenly clashed their lips together hungrily into a heated make out session. Their tongues dancing around in their mouths fighting for dominance as he pushed her up against the wall and his arms pulled her hips closer to him, her hands pulling at his hair. It surprised them at first, but neither of them pulled away as they missed each other’s touch all too much. Y/n quickly jumped up, wrapping her legs around his waist as the kiss continued to get even more heated and sloppy. Their bodies moved perfectly in sync with one another, y/n whined at the contact against her heat at his growing erection.

2nd person pov

Hook pulled away and tugged at your shirt, you let him pull it off effortlessly and he kissed down you jaw to your neck, biting and sucking harshly in the same spots as the previous guy had left his mark causing you to let out small moans. He made sure his were more prominent and dark before latching onto your sweet spot on your neck that never failed to drive you insane. “you know- every time I see- your neck marked up- I don’t think- I ever saw one- here.” His voice mixed with cockiness that was muffled with his mouth pressed up against your skin. You moaned as he bit harder before soothing it with his tongue. “Oh my god-“ you breathed out, grinding against him more. “It drives me crazy- knowing that- every guy- you’ve slept with- doesn’t know how to- make you feel good.” You were gasping in pleasure, missing the feeling of someone actually knowing, or even caring, to make you feel this good. It was true, every guy didn’t ever take the time to at least try and learn how to make you feel good. They either assumed what felt good, or just simply didn’t care, only using you for their own pleasure.

He carried you over to the bed and threw you down, unbuckling his belt and pulling his pants and underwear down enough for his cock to spring out before leaning down to your face, “can I ask how many times total you’ve actually came while sleeping with them, darling?” He asked while caressing the side of your face, “total..?” You asked cautiously. He nodded and you thought about it, “ten…” you lied, trying to look away, “not including the fake ones.” You sighed “…um..maybe three..?” You shyly admitted, face turning a light shade of pink. He smirked and pulled your hips closer to his, “that’s what I thought” he pulled your thong to the side and lined himself up, “I can easily make you come more times than that.” He stated. Your eyes widened at his words but before you could say anything, he pushed himself into you causing you to let out a moan. The feeling of him stretching you out perfectly made you throw your head back, gripping the sheets beneath you. “Oh fuck-“ you whimpered as he bottomed out, “that’s it, just feel it.” He cooed. He pulled back out and eased back into you. You gasped at the feeling of his cock moving in and out of you at a steady pace. You knew (especially from experience) that it was extremely rare to find someone who could make you feel good without trying. It made you more upset that James was that person for you. Like your pussy was made to fit around his cock. Like it was made just for him and him only.

He picked up his pace and ducked his head down to your chest, taking one of your nipples in his mouth and sucking it while he rubbed circles on your sensitive clit. Your hands found their way back into his hair and you let out desperate moans, feeling the knot in your stomach tightening. You ground yourself onto him, meeting his hips as your back arched off the bed, “fuck- James-“ you cursed, tugging at his hair more as you felt your release approaching fast. Your walls tightened and you felt your first orgasm wash over you letting out a groan. He lifted his head and looked down at you while still fucking into you, “not even a few minutes in and I’ve already made you come?” He smiled. Your legs shook at the overstimulation while furrowing your eyebrows and flipped him off but quickly grabbed his wrist beside your stomach as he skillfully positioned his hips to hit your g spot causing you to moan louder and he let out a chuckle finding it amusing how well he made you feel.

Your grip on his wrist tightened and your eyes rolled back feeling your second orgasm approaching quicker than the last as you let out a whimpered scream. “Yeah, you can do it, come for me again baby.” He praised, “shit!” You screamed out as you came again on his cock. The sound of your juices squelching out from your hole as he still continued to fuck into you filling the air. You dug your nails into his skin as your whole body began to tremble beneath him. You shook your head, “I- can’t- take it- anymore-“ you cried. He brought his hand up to your face, “yes you can-fuck-“ he cut himself off with a moan, “two more for me, come on.” He stopped for a moment to throw your legs over his shoulders and began picking up his pace, this time faster than before causing your toes to curl as he hit a spot deeper inside you. He grabbed your hand as he ploughed his hips into yours. Your mouth fell open and your eyes clenched shut, raspy weak moans escaping your mouth. You hated that he was the only guy who knew how to make you feel this good. But at the moment you didn’t care, mind too caught up in the way his cock filled you up in all the right places. The continuous feeling of his tip abusing your cervix and sounds that fell from his lips (that you missed terribly) made your whole body tense up as it ripped another orgasm out of you.

He grabbed your hips to hold them still, feeling you try to pull away from the extremely overwhelming and intense feeling of pleasure soon turning to pain. The walls of your pussy clenching as tightly as possible, not knowing if they were trying to suck him in or push him out. “Too much! Too much!” You screamed, “just one more, I know you can do it sweetheart. You remember our safe word- don’t you darling? If you want me to stop- shit- just let me know.” Of course you remembered. Though you’ve never had to use it, and you knew he knew how much you could handle. Your stubbornness wanted to prove to him that you could take what he gave you. Soon after, your thoughts were clouded by the feeling of your last orgasm that hit you harder than the rest, your whole body spasming and trembling as you screamed his name louder than ever, eyes rolling all the way back in your head as juices squirted out of you like a fountain while you felt him finish inside of you, moaning out loud with you before pulling out.

Your body continued to shake uncontrollably and you let out pathetic whines with tears streaming out of your eyes again as the feeling didn’t stop even after he had pulled out, your hole clenching on nothing but air. He soothingly rubbed circles on your thigh trying to calm you down from your high, talking you through it. Eventually you came down, body and legs still shaking. When you both caught your breaths, there was an uncomfortable silence that filled the air once again. Neither of you knew how to feel or what to say. Hook silently got up and grabbed a towel from your bathroom, cleaning you off first then trying his best to clean up the mess you’d made on him and his clothes without much luck. He sighed and turned to you,

“Um… do you still have my spare change of clothe-“

“Bottom drawer.”

“Okay.”

[en-stbc]

i've seen enough people crying over this uzi sacrifice scene in ep7 but i don't think enough people actually analyzes esp uzi and N's character (atleast from what i've seen??) and my god i need to rant because this scene the more i watch it the more it ABSOLUTELY destroys me (save me nuzi save me...)

messy rant incoming...

alright, quick recap of the characters so i can later explain my points better

pilot uzi had no one to rely on, treated as a freak by her community, neglected by her father and overall completely isolated with the world. She had no one but herself, that's why she never allows herself to show any vulnerabilities so people won't take advantage of her and literally dismisses her own feelings and coping mechanisms as "angsty hormonal teen feelings" and developed a inferiority complex of wanting to prove herself and be recognized. Meeting N was more than just a change of trajectory in her life, he helped her in so, SO many ways from making her realize that her feelings are validated and it's okay to lean on others when you need it the most, to be vulnerable- something that she desperately needed but was never provided- to helping her just.. overall improve herself and promise that he'll always be there when she needs him the most. N is so integral in uzi's life, all she needed was someone to understand her, and there he was.

meanwhile N is always treated as a worthless nobody by people around him which is very evident in the pilot with his interactions between J and V. He clearly has issues when it comes to his own self worth and completely robbed of autonomy. All he ever wanted was to be useful and seen by others, which leads to him going along with other's insane crazy ideas without questioning morals and rights or wrongs. Uzi was the one that helped him find a ground he can stand on and finally being able to defend himself and what he thinks is worth protecting, as well as being a genuine friend he can finally talk and bond with after being ignored for so long.

and back to the scene. The reason why this scene hurts so much for me is that uzi finally found someone so important to her that she's willing to sacrifice herself and thanked N for "everything" he's ever done. He gave her everything that she could possibly ask for, she was content. Uzi even used her solver powers to push N away to make sure he wasn't in danger or an attempt to save her. The fact that she even thanked N, making it sounds like her final words to him implies that she was okay with dying and giving up her own life just really says how much N meant to her. She couldn't have done all of this without meeting him, to be selfless and sacrifice yourself for someone you truly love.

for N he's probably absolutely devastated, especially after V's sacrifice the ep before. Both of his closest friends sacrificed also for the sake of saving him, he literally could not do anything but watch them disappear in front of him. He'd probably blame himself so much for failing to save them and the fact that he has self harm tendencies every time he makes a mistake... N is definitely VERY TRAUMATIZED from this and also needs time to heal as well.

overall im very normal about nuzi these 2 will be the death of me i love them so much. both of them meeting each other was the best thing that ever happened to them and watching them grow and develop is so 😭😭😭

have a good day thank you so much for reading this very messy rant and bare with my very limited vocabulary if you did... ;3

[gravedigginbbydoll]

pencil shavings and shared smiles {pt.6}

Fem! Teacher Reader x Teacher! Eddie

Previous Masterlist Next

AN: Hey y’all! So we get a little taste of the spice to come ;) Angst will also build later lol. Please like and reblog and lemme know what you think! 

WARNINGS AND CONTENT: Minors DNI!!!, Noncanon, Hawkins AU, Normal Hawkins, Rumors about Eddie, Smut, Mentions of Masturbation and Sexual Acts, Trauma, Reader is horny lol, Very fluffy, Outcasts and Bullying, Mentions of Loneliness, Flirting, drinking, violence/fighting, drug usage, mentions of death, Fem!Reader, use of nickname Tish in place of Y/N, older! Eddie, short-haired Eddie, 1995/1996 Hawkins, F! Reader has a dark past, F! Reader is a former goth lol, angsty angst.

Summary: When you and Eddie just begin blooming into something, a ghost from the past begins to haunt you. Your coping mechanism is less than ideal, given it involves a certain tall and dorky metalhead.

Ever since that night out in the field, you find yourself leaning more and more into the idea that this electricity between you and Eddie could lead somewhere. You lean more into his lingering touches and find yourself hanging out more with his friends. Hell, just this past weekend, you had joined Eddie and his friends for a movie night out in Steve’s backyard. You and Eddie cuddled on a blanket, earning some teasing remarks from Steve and Robin, causing you both to throw popcorn at them. 

Things were beginning to look up in Hawkins. You were getting the hang of teaching your classes and were happy to see a few students excited about literature. You had made the most of your apartment, covering the ugly green leather eyesore of a couch in pillows and blankets and ensuring the peeling pink floral wallpaper was hidden by a large bookshelf and some art you found at the thrift store. You even began cooking meals for yourself, finding the routine comforting.

There is that lingering feeling of uncertainty tickling the back of your brain despite all this. You tried to will it away. There was no warning sign yet. You gained friends from Eddie, as well as the kind and dorky metalhead himself. You found yourself like a young and giddy teen again, sneaking handholds at the teachers’ lounge and making Eddie lunches when you discovered he always brought instant ramen for lunch ( Eddie disclosed to you that the best thing he could make was sandwiches and maybe breakfast). You had no reason to be on guard. 

Except…

The dreams. They began a few days ago. You would be back in the city, your apartment, your old grounds. You kept finding yourself in the same place you were about a month or so ago. In the dreams, you were stuffing a suitcase, your chest tight, and your vision blurred and distorted from tears. The dream always ended the same way. You would walk to the door, only to find it locked, and the walls would start closing in. You would panic, tugging at the door, pleading with anyone to set you free. Afterward, the same voice would ring out behind you, sour and condescending despite the words spoken.

 “Don’t leave. I’ll change. Don’t hurt me again…” 

You would wake in a cold shock whenever you felt the same large clammy hand on your shoulder. He wasn’t there, of course. He couldn’t be. You were miles away, no note left and no trace of you. 

You tried to brush off the dreams, but they kept waking you up earlier and earlier. Eddie was first to notice, offering you coffee every morning and taking bus duty for you when he could. You felt a pang of tugging guilt in your gut at his gestures, knowing that maybe if you just spoke about the issue, you would feel some weight off your shoulders. But you couldn’t bring your mouth to ever open or the words to come out. 

You still indulge in Eddie’s touch and affection, lingering hands, and flirtatious winks when no one looks. But today was the fourth day in a row you had the dream. You should call them nightmares, but the word dreams felt less…drastic. You were drained. You found yourself with less patience than usual, being much more stern with the students than expected. You skip your regular lunch with Eddie and Will. By your last period, you feel like a zombie. Going through the motions, trying to stomach the idea of sleeping again tonight.

You’re locking up your classroom and about to head home when you run into a broad chest, Eddie’s warm and spicy scent filling your nostrils. You look up at him, feeling the urge to lean into him, to be embraced. He looks at you, warm brown eyes full of concern and lips tugged down at the corner. 

“Tish, what’s going on? You’ve been on edge this entire week. You’re tired and…” His eyes search your face for answers, hesitating on his last words, his brows furrowed. You want nothing more than to soothe the little wrinkle between his brows. “I feel worried.” 

Your heart tugs at his words, but your brain swirls with sharp thoughts, your lack of sleep making it harder to block out. 

Look at you, making your own stupid shit, everyone else’s problem.

Maybe you should tell him. 

No, because you clearly are making a big deal out of nothing. He’s trying to be nice. He doesn’t wanna hear your ridiculous sob story. He has actual issues. 

Just keep it to yourself. You don’t want another person to know what a whiny crybaby you are, do you?

You fake a smile in his direction, shaking your head. You will keep this to yourself. Eddie is untarnished so far, not murky and grayed by your influence and presence. If you let him in too far, it was only a matter of time before your inky black destruction leaked into him, tarring his insides and making him bitter. 

“I’m okay. Noisy neighbors. You know how it is. I’m just scared to approach them,” You lie easily, feeling a twinge of guilt in your gut. 

Eddie’s eyes are intense, warm brown darkening as he stares at you with some fierce emotion you can’t quite place. His voice is low and stern, making you curse inwardly at how your skin tingles and your face warms. 

“Tish, I know for a fact that’s a damn lie.” 

Your mouth feels dry as you struggle for words, awkwardly laughing and looking away. 

“I-”

He grabs your chin, moving it so you have to look into his eyes. The stern and authoritative action causes your stomach to flutter. You steel your resolve to not break until his mouth opens again, his voice practically a whisper, but his stern and no-bullshit tone causes your breath to catch in your throat. 

“You don’t have to tell me, but I’m here for you. Don’t try to handle everything alone.” 

Your skin is aflame from his touch, and when he takes his hand away, you feel a longing for the touch back. He turns around, walking away, leaving you to stare at his broad back and long legs, his hands in his leather jacket pockets. 

Your chest tightens, and you sigh out a bit of relief. You may not take his offer now, but it was nice to know it was there.

The following week, you’ve gotten a handle on blocking out the nightmares. The method, however, leads to you dodging Eddie a bit more than usual. It’s embarrassing to try to face those warm and caring eyes when the thing chasing away the nightmares is the thought of him looming over you. 

You first learned the cure that weekend after his stern tone caressed your ears. His voice’s low timbre and authority still sent shivers down your spine that day. You had been laying in bed the weekend after, dreading the thought of sleeping, trying to calm your nerves. You then remembered Eddie’s words, the intensity of his gaze, and his grip on your chin. You felt laid bare before him despite being clothed. Your brain began to swirl with ideas about how the look would feel if you wore less. 

You knew you had been attracted to Eddie before these thoughts but had tried to push the ideas down. But that night, your brain swirled with the image of Eddie looming over you, those dark eyes laying you bare as his calloused hands explored you. You imagined his stern voice telling you to be good for him and his lips nipping at your neck. These thoughts led to a hand traveling down your sleep shorts, your chest heaving, and the desire pooling between your thighs. 

That night you were left panting and spent, shocked by the lust that overtook you. You hadn’t felt this way in months, maybe even years. Sure, you had masturbated, but it wasn’t often. Plus, it felt more like a chore to complete when you came around to it, hating how your hands cramped or how you felt guilty after. This time, all that was left was a worn-out body and a calm sleep. 

However, now you couldn’t seem to face Eddie without immediately feeling heat creep up your neck to the tips of your ears, your stomach twisting with nerves and embarrassment. You had spent the week dodging him, making excuses when you could. When you did speak to him, you were shy and far quieter than usual. You felt a sting at his puppy dog eyes and confusion flashing across his face every time you dashed away. Every time he gave you those looks, you swore to yourself you wouldn’t touch yourself to him that night, only to have the wild fantasies enter your mind in bed and your ever-traitorous hands explore yourself. 

Today, you find him blocking your exit while getting ready to lock up, his immense stature in your doorway. You blink at him in shock, trying to stomp down the swirling feeling of desire at his intense gaze towards you, feeling your thighs squeeze as if it’s instinct. 

“Tish, did you forget it’s Friday?” He sternly questioned you, a brow raised. 

You furrowed your brows, searching your mind for the significance of the weekday, only to feel your stomach sink and guilt wash over you. You had planned to hang with Eddie and his former bandmates weeks in advance, who had scheduled to get together and play at his house for old time’s sake. They planned it so far ahead because Gareth was always busy with his baby daughter (who he thought hung the moon). Jeff was engaged and planning a wedding with his fiance for the next couple of months. You felt embarrassment intertwine in your belly as you thought about how you let your dirty thoughts distance you from Eddie, your closest friend. You could never explain to him why. 

“I’m so sorry, Eds, I can still-” 

He walks forward, shaking his head. “Tish, I really hope I didn’t do something wrong. I’m sorry if I ever made you uncomfortable or pushed you-” 

You laugh, shaking your head as you feel the tips of your ears warm. “No, no! I just… There’s been a lot on my mind lately,” You offer weakly, knowing by Eddie’s dark gaze that he doesn’t fully believe you, but he doesn’t push it. 

“Well, if you’re still coming to hear us shitheads play…Want a ride?” He grins devilishly, twirling his keys. 

You nod and walk alongside him in the hallway to the parking lot, gently holding his hand for the first time in almost over a week. When you reach his truck and climb in, your nerves go haywire. Your gut twists, anxious as you realize the get-together is at Eddie’s. In his home. Where he lives. Where he sleeps, eats, and showers. Your brain flashes ideas of Eddie in his house. 

Eddie lounging on a couch reading. 

Eddie throwing his formal work shirts haphazardly onto a chair to replace them with his comfortable band shirts, tattoos all on display. 

Eddie playing guitar while sitting on his bed, biting his pretty lips in concentration. 

Eddie hunched over in his bathroom, his muscles under his expansive back and biceps flexing and rippling as he hurriedly strokes his length, his brows creased and his other arm bracing the counter as he-

You stop yourself, realizing that you are practically panting and your entire chest and face is warm. Luckily Eddie can’t hear you over the thrash metal playing through his speakers. However, he does give you an odd and questioning glance occasionally. 

You finally pull into his driveway. His house is a simple and small one story in the suburbs, the outside an unassuming shabby white wood with a gray roof. There are two small windows in the front and a little shed in the back. 

You steel your nerves, clenching your fists so your nails dig into your palms. 

Act normal. 

Eddie parks the car, taking his key out of the ignition as he speaks to you. “The guys are getting here a little later, so I can give you a tour of the place, and we can chill out for a bit. That okay?” He questions cautiously, his big brown eyes full of hope. 

You swallow, your heart in your throat. 

Alone. With Eddie. In his house. 

The man you’ve been having wet daydreams about. 

But you can’t bear to cause sorrow behind those big brown eyes or be torn from his magnetic pull, so you smile instead. Your stomach twists as your palms get clammy. 

“Of course, Eds! Let’s head in.” 

You were so fucked. 

taglist: @bebe07011@corrodedcoffincumslut@kurdtbean@nerdflash@kimmi-kat@aheadfullofsteverogers

[draftingteacups]

I'm not sure if this has been asked yet, but now we've seen Sobble and Inteleon's dynamic with Octavinelle but so far I haven't read or caught a mention of Drizzile. We know from the anime and the game that Drizzile is basically an angsty, depressive teen who wallows in a hidden space. How did Octavinelle handle it when he evolved into a Drizzile? (P.S. Love the Sobble line because they recall memories with you to motivate themselves, in-game and anime w/ Drizzile. Not sure if others do it too)

It's been a while since I've answered asks, but I've never gotten one about Drizzile, that's for sure! I feel like Azul would feel a little distance at the fact that the clingy Sobble that he'd taken care of had become a angsty teen. I can totally see him trying to get Drizzile into hobbies that they had done together, but it doesn't always work. Azul is trying his best to cope with his former crybaby becoming a little more distant.

You know that Floyd's gonna try his best to get a reaction out of the Pokemon. It's gonna end poorly, but it's certainly going to be funny in the process. Jade just lets Floyd have his fun, probably waits until Azul comes into the room.

Azul: "What's happening in here?!"

Jade: "Ah, we are trying to motivate Drizzile."

Azul: "By throwing him onto a trampoline? Where did you find that anyways?"

Floyd definitely stole it from someone. For hilarity, it might be Vil's.

I do think that Drizzile with the Octavinelle boys would remember the things that they did together when the Pokemon was smaller. Shows affection differently than before, but will do small gestures of care like putting on Azul's hat when no one's looking and taking it off of Azul's when the Dorm Head falls asleep at his desk doing paperwork.

Drizzile is more sneaky about their ways of showing affection, but no less than when they were a Sobble.

[lakesbian]

The Main Thing about rymin fanfiction is that people tend to take the default premise of "okay, they didn't get together in the season, so they must have like an angsty journey to figure out they like each other afterwards" but this is not actually. Sensible. season four is, the flaws in its writing aside, in large part fundamentally about min-gi and ryan overcoming various stifling conceptions about what they're supposed to be doing w/ their lives, including marginalized status--min-gi explicitly has to address how he feels about the idea of trying to enter the music industry as an asian-canadian man in the 1980s, and while ryan isn't unequivocally/canonically ADHD, his characterization is demonstrably haunted by intense impulsivity, RSD-like behaviors, the whole "i couldn't get into uni if i tried, you should be looking forward to it" thing, etc. the core problem behind their numbers frankly isn't as clearly defined as the core problems in s1 and s2, but it is clear that they have to 1. come to terms with the baggage involving societal perception of them/their childhood goals that pushed them apart in the first place and 2. decide to stick together before the train deems their problems solved. like, min-gi literally is not getting off that motherfucking train before he goes "ah, i see! trying to cram myself into a business suit shaped coffin to Appease The World will make me miserable. i should drop out of college and go be in a two-person band touring the big city with my best friend of 20 years instead."

which is to say. if they were gay and mutually in love with each other, there is absolutely no way that wouldn't be a main stifling factor for their life plans. there is absolutely no way that wouldn't be a Main Thing they're both trying to bury 50 feet deep. there is absolutely no way that wouldn't be a main reason min-gi can't bring himself to go with ryan after they graduate. and a main reason ryan can't bring himself not to drive away. which means there's absolutely no way it wouldn't HAVE to be addressed on the train. the narrative most compelling here is not "they somehow magically only have to deal with being gay for their childhood best friend in the '80s afterwards," it's "being closeted gay men in the 1980s absolutely Haunts their lifelong friendship and they engaged in an insane amount of closeness as children and homoeroticism as teens that they increasingly repressed as they grew up before their inability to confront it + differing personalities/coping mechanisms led to min-gi staying in their hometown heading to college and ryan driving away during a little never-married divorce during which they're both constantly yearning for each other until they both reach a crossroads in life where their option is to sort their shit out or just suffer badly forever, which leads to them boarding the train in the way we see in the twin tapes, which leads to them having to unpack all their issues and fully recognize their emotions and get together on the train before they can exit." You Know? it's gonna be a big deal and characters being on the train is About the big deal shit, it's just inherently the most compelling option to retcon the season a bit if yr doing fic to have them sort it out on the train

[saintsenara]

If your still taking emoji game asks, I’ll go for 👍 💌 👽 You recs are always divine!

thank you so much for the ask, anon - i am definitely still taking asks for this game :)

👍🏽 a fic you bookmarked recently

beasts by @whinlatter 

harry potter/ginny weasley teen | 80k words

why i recommend it:

i am - obviously - on the record as not a hinny girly, but whinlatter is one of the few people able to convince me of the pairing. this is because she’s a beautiful writer, but it’s mainly - and i think this is incredibly important - because she writes the stars of the show as actually funny. there seems to be a real tendency in "how is the world rebuilt after the war?" fics to make everything unstoppably angsty, with lots of therapy-speak processing of trauma. and that never hits for me, largely because it’s not something i can picture harry "what’s a coping mechanism?" potter and friends being willing to do.

beasts instead gets the vibe completely right - teenagers without all the answers muddling through as best as they can, which always seems to result in them choosing the stupidest [and funniest] option. harry is both self-isolating and self-righteous, hermione is brittle and very loyal, ron is the only one with any emotional stability, mcgonagall has had enough, and ginny is - to quote the author herself - written like scrappy do.

which isn’t to say that this fic isn’t angsty - it is, at heart, an exploration both of how ginny deals with being back at hogwarts in 1998-99 when the castle is filled with memories she’d rather not have to think about every day, and of how the end of voldemort doesn’t magically mean an end to the astonishing corruption in wizarding society. 

it also has an acceptable amount of hits if you control + f "riddle". so there’s that.

👽 a fic that isn’t prose (poetry, text fic, etc.)

no amount of therapy can help by @the-wig-is-a-metaphor

harry potter/tom riddle | voldemort general 

why i recommend it:

because it makes me shriek.

harrymort youtuber au? it's likelier than you think.

💌 a fic that inspired you to create something for it

this is cheating, because it’s not a specific fic, but @broomsticks [who you will know as leftsidedown on ao3] inspires me a great deal. she is absolutely committed to multi-shipping [and especially to femslash multishipping] in a way which is really quite rare now, as well as to exploring the full spectrum - from fluff to filth to filthy fluff - we can write our characters into. plus, she’s a fandom history encyclopedia, and one of the few people on earth apparently willing to do statistical analysis of harry potter fanfiction for fun. she also gives great prompts, which have led to two of my favourite pieces of my own work: enchanter’s nightshade and the three sisters.

and three pieces of hers you should try: the best of us | in another life | for everything a season

[milos-lil-corner]

Specific thoughts about Lazari Swann

More or less a post to ramble about ideas, interpretations, and headcanons about Lazari Swann lol

From reading her backstory, her mother thought she was a gift from her God, she would have absolutely cherished and babied infant Lazari to death. Calling her a miracle, a gift from God, a shining star - smothering her with affection. If Lazari never had that demonic heritage or eaten that possessed man, she would have been living a decent life with a loving mother. Or maybe not. Dunno, torturing your child for four years immediately after you find them eating a man alive doesn't exactly scream "I will be the best parent ever if the circumstances were different".

I'd like to treat Lazari's hungered state like an infection - the blackened shell of corruption infecting bits of her skin the longer she doesn't eat, slowly removing Lazari's ability to control herself before she goes rabid and starts mindlessly feeding. It would put a bigger emphasis on why Lazari would see herself as a monster, more or less nothing but a rabid animal when she is in her hungered state.

When Lazari is older, around 16-18, she begins to mentally deconstruct and attempt to remember what happened to her during her childhood - more or less remembering, attempting to rationalize, and doing her own form of therapy. It's shitty therapy, as she doesn't exactly have the psychological know-how or education to know how to do that, but it's something she would attempt.

Her talent of artistry would get better as time went on, maybe getting into drawing realistic faces or human beings to sort of cope with her situation. I think she would also turn to crafts, especially making bracelets ( rubber band bracelets, Kandi bracelets, etc ).

I don't like how the I Eat Pasta For Breakfast went, especially with Lazari apparently running off and being found by her aunt? or something? Idk, the whole comic is just strange to me and I'd rather her have stayed in the mansion with different circumstances. Having somewhat of a stable ( stable in heavy quotes ) home full of killers and creatures would be an interesting way to explore Lazari and the residents, maybe with better circumstances or something. Idk, I just take issue with the comic as a whole, even if the end result was getting an interesting character to poke at like Lazari.

I'd imagine Lazari would steer away from things she would consider to be childish - wearing dresses, having tea parties, etc - to be seen as more grown than she actually is around 11-12. More or less a way to cope and an attempt to gain more respect from those around her ( even though that would be futile cause, you know - she's around losers basically ).

I think Lazari would have massive issues when it came to religion - at least when she finds out her mother made a deal with Zalgo to have her. "If she was the result of her mother being stupid enough to make a deal with a man she thought was a God and created her, then what does that say about other cults and religions? Religion is stupid.". More or less that thought process. Maybe later on, she realizes the nuances or gets to experience a more positive example of religion, but lol.

The relationship between Slenderman and Lazari, depending on how the person sees Slenderman, is interesting to me. Especially if said Slenderman has some kind of weird relationship or beef with Zalgo. For example, Slenderman was an ex-soldier/follower of Zalgo and decided to break off into their own little rebel group to go against him ( made up of angsty teens and weaker creatures, but shush it's for rp purposes ). Anyways, Slenderman taking in someone like Lazari, a child of his enemy, having conflicts on taking her in - trying to come up with some reason to keep her that isn't just "she is a child."

Adding onto that, You know that Slenderman would keep Lazari some closely guarded secret, at least between his close circle of either his siblings or whatever proxy group he has - allowing Lazari contact with the other residents with one of his trusted present. Lazari resents Slenderman because she doesn't know why Slenderman even took her in when she is treated like some animal that will kill everyone in the house. "why would it keep me here if it thinks I'll kill everyone in here? am I just here for...no reason?"

Then it all congeals into a moment where Lazari, probably more grown, confronts Slenderman about her treatment and assumes Slenderman avoids or is curt towards her because it fears her - when really, it's a precaution on Slenderman's part because he really does not know what she is capable of.

"I am treated like a bomb, but cared for like a child."

[stingraymilk]

HEY YOU!

Yes, you!

Like angsty coming of age stories filled with fluff and lovable characters? Take a look at this:

[TW: cancer & possible death]

18+ ONLY

I have this really amazing story idea that I would be thrilled to rp out with someone.

It’s about a boy/teen named Rory who is a social media poster child. He comes from a rich family but uses that money and time to donate to charities and do heartwarming pranks that benefit people such as giving them money, buying them food and clothes and home makeovers and such. He’s incredibly famous, all around the world for being so sweet and mature for his age.

But Rory is diagnosed with cancer only a year into his climb to fame. He continues to carry on with his channel and social media accounts while going through the process to try and be cancer free again.

Still with me? This is where YOU come in.

You’ll be playing a young girl/teen named Heaven (or you can change her name but her name in the story I made is Heaven). She used to go to school with Rory before his parents took him out due to him being ill and too widely known. Heaven comments on one of his videos and people take notice, tagging Rory and telling him to look at her sweet comment. Once he reaches out, the two agree to rekindle their friendship.

Due to Rory’s fame, Heaven starts to become popular for her singing abilities. They both deal with online bullies, Rory’s worsening health conditions and anything else you’d like to add. Rory is obviously too sick and is too young for a proper relationship but I’d like to think the two of them are committed to each other. Just in a different way. Almost like platonic best friends but there is always that *hint* of shyness with certain moments shared.

This story is NOT sexual. The two of them are innocent children and them dating or not dating isn’t important to me. Someone close to me has cancer and this is my way of coping. I’m not romanticizing cancer in any way. I’m simply a person who copes in unique ways and never wants to grow up/never got a proper childhood.

There’s more to this story but I don’t want to make the post any longer than it already is sooo like this ad to get a message from me and learn more!

[d-s-winchester]

My Only Wish This Year

(gif credit to the creator)

Part One

Master List

Pairing: Jensen x Reader Word Count: 2,249 Warnings: angsty teens, mentions of death, mentions of a dead parent, mentions of a dead spouse A/N: I’M BACK BITCHES!!!! I haven’t posted writing on this blog in exactly two years and seven months. I’m happy to be back and to be back writing Jensen. Writing Jensen (and Dean) always seems to come easiest to me so it makes sense that this was the way to go. If you’d like to be tagged let me know, in an ask (it’s the best way for me to keep track)! Hope you guys like it! Anyway, feedback for this is crucial seeing as I’m just stepping back in! :)

Jensen leaned against the back of his SUV and let out a sigh as he stared at his front door. He knew he was going to have a hard time getting his teenagers to agree to going on this trip so close to Christmas, especially when the option to spend Christmas with their grandparents was still open, but he wasn’t expecting it to be quite this hard. He knew he could have taken the easy road, not pick the fight, and just let them go to their grandparents but he wanted them to find some way back to a semblance of normal.

In the two years since his wife passed away he’d been having more than a hard time keeping things normal. Sure, he’d taken as much time off work as he could, and tried every coping mechanism in the book but the one thing he couldn’t figure out how to navigate was raising two teenagers on his own. His parents helped out a lot, especially when he was away filming, but he knew they were a poor substitute for the mother his children lost. So he tried to pull it together whenever he was home, especially during the holidays, and he knew that this Christmas needed to be better than the last.

That first Christmas was a rough one, Jensen could hardly get out of bed. She’d only been gone three months and he was having a hard time coping and his kids had suffered because of it. His parents did a good job of making it as happy of a Christmas as they could but his kids wanted their father and sure Jensen was there physically but mentally he was totally checked out. Which was why he was determined to make this Christmas better than the last.

“Alright, that’s it,” Jensen mumbled to himself as he pushed away from the truck and went back into the house.

He could hear the music blaring from his son’s room and it was so loud it almost drowned out the sound of the blow dryer coming from his daughter’s bathroom.

“Jordan!” he called out as he made his way up the stairs, knowing full well his son couldn’t hear him.

Figuring his daughter would be more likely to listen to him he changed course and headed toward her bedroom. He pounded on the door so she could hear him over the noise that was taking over the second floor of his house and waited for her to come to the door. It only took a minute before she opened the door.

“What, Dad?”

“Lizzie, I told you over an hour ago to be packed and ready to go by now,” he sighed. “If we don’t leave in the next five minutes we’ll be late checking into the hotel for tonight.”

“I’ll only be like two more minutes, I promise. My bags are already packed,” she said gesturing to the two large duffle bags seated on her bed.

Without another word she turned and made her way back to the bathroom. Jensen sighed for what felt like the thousandth time that morning and went to grab her bags before dropping them at the top of the stairs and going toward his son’s room. He pounded on the door but the music just got louder. At that moment he wondered if he had ever been this disrespectful to his parents at sixteen. He knew he’d been difficult on the occasion but he hoped he hadn’t been this bad.

“Jordan! It’s time to go!” Jensen called through the door and the music finally shut off. “We’ve gotta be out of here in five minutes, you better be packed.”

“Of course I’m packed,” Jordan said, yanking his bedroom door open. “I packed this morning when it became obvious that this stupid trip wasn’t a joke.”

This time Jensen opted not to pick this fight, knowing full well he didn’t have the energy to get into a screaming match with his son.

“Just grab your bags and bring them down to the car, please.”

“Whatever,” Jordan groaned and grabbed the bag off his bed and pushed past his father toward the stairs, grabbing his sister’s bags as he went.

Jensen was grateful that at least he was still willing to help his sister even if he wanted nothing to do with his father. Jensen wiped a hand down his face and ran his fingers through his hair and was about to try and rush his daughter out of the bathroom again just as Lizzie was coming out of her room, pulling her winter jacket on.

“Is Jordan outside already?” she asked and Jensen nodded as she pushed past him to join her older brother down by the car.

With yet another sigh Jensen followed his daughter out of the house and toward the car, it was going to be a long couple of days on the drive up to the B&B in Maine – even with a stop at a hotel for a good night sleep along the way – and he was hoping against all hope that maybe his kids would come around during the trip and they could find a way to be a normal family again.

The entire drive to the hotel that marked the halfway point of their drive was spent in almost complete silence with both Jordan and Lizzie spending a majority of the time with their headphones in, only pulling them out to have whispered conversations with each other. Needless to say, Jensen didn’t have high hopes for the second half of their drive. They were about an hour away from the B&B when his son had fallen asleep. He thought Lizzie was asleep too until she spoke.

“Why’d you pick Maine for Christmas, Dad?” she asked. “We could have just gone to Grandma and Grandpa’s or even to Uncle Jared and Aunt Gen’s.”

“I know that, Half Pint, but I figured we could go away for the week. Spend some time just the three of us. As a family. That and I thought some snow for Christmas wouldn’t be so bad.”

“Don’t let him fool you, Liz,” Jordan piped up from next to her, clearly having woken up from his nap. “We’re not a family, we haven’t been since mom died and we never will be.”

“Hey! Watch it!” Jensen said, eyeing him in the rearview mirror.

“What? It’s the truth!” Jordan shouted.

“Jordan –” Lizzie cautioned her brother.

Jensen took a deep breath, ready to lecture his son, but decided against it when Jordan turned toward the window and crossed his arms over his chest.

“Whatever,” Jordan mumbled, shoving his headphones back into his ears.

Lizzie, too, sat back in her seat and put her headphones back in her ears. Jensen let out a sigh and turned his own radio up, more than ready to get to the B&B and get checked in.

Prepping for new arrivals always had you stressed, no matter how often you had them. This one was particularly stressful as the family had booked the only adjoining rooms your B&B had to offer, which meant a little extra prep. It stressed you out but that didn’t mean that you didn’t enjoy your job. You loved being able to have people experience your small town by staying at the B&B, especially this time of year. The town, and by extension the B&B, seemed to come alive during Christmastime and the large evergreen tree farm spanning the back couple of acres of your land didn’t hurt that holiday magic.

You were putting the finishing touches on the smaller of the two rooms when you saw the headlights pulling up the drive. You didn’t have any other patrons booked for an arrival that day and everyone else was already halfway through dessert in the large living room which meant that your newest patrons had arrived right on time. Taking a deep breath, you gave the room one more look to make sure everything was in order, and made your way back downstairs to wait behind the front desk.

Jensen pulled into the small parking lot of the Evergreen Forest Bed and Breakfast with just enough time to get the car unloaded before their check-in time. He parked the SUV, climbed out and stretched before opening up the trunk and pulling out bags.

“Alright you two, I need help with all the bags. Out of the car, please,” Jensen said from the trunk.

The groans of protest didn’t go unnoticed as Jordan and Lizzie got out of the car, slamming the doors behind them, and came around to meet their father by the trunk. Jordan practically snatched his bag from Jensen’s hand as Lizzie reached into the trunk to grab the two bags of her own. Jensen grabbed his bags and shut the trunk of the car, hitting the lock button on his keys, before leading the way up to the front of the B&B – his kids all the while complaining about their shoes getting caked in the snow that was covering the ground.

The building was larger than it looked in the photos on the website and it sat on a pretty large piece of land. In the distance Jensen could see the large tree farm and seated slightly off to the side, in between the tree farm and the large house in front of him, was a smaller house which he assumed is where the owner lived. Figuring he could always get a lay of the land when it was light out the next day he led his children up the front porch steps and stomped the snow off his shoes before he opened the front door of the B&B.

The bell above the front door chimed and you looked up from the computer to see a tall man and his two teenagers walk through the door, the man reminding his kids to wipe the snow from their feet.

“Welcome to the Evergreen Forest,” you greeted. “You must be the Ackles family.”

“That we are,” the man smiled, approaching the desk. “I’m Jensen and these are my kids, Jordan and Lizzie.”

It took you a second to get your bearings when his brilliant green eyes met yours. You composed yourself quickly, hoping no one noticed your momentary loss of the ability to speak. You couldn’t remember the last time a man had been so handsome that he rendered you speechless – something that was difficult to do since you normally couldn’t shut up – but you shoved the thoughts from your mind and reminded yourself that he was one of your guests.

“It’s nice to meet you all, my name is Y/N. I am the owner and manager and basically everything but the cook,” you chuckled. “Now, let’s get you checked in.”

You went through the check-in process and grabbed the keys to the adjoining rooms from the hooks on the wall behind you and motioned for the family to follow you. When you reached the two rooms you handed the keys over.

“The room to the left has the two twin beds,” you said, handing Lizzie the key before turning toward Jensen and handing him the other key. “And the room to the right is the master. If you need anything at all my number is next to the phone on the end table. I live in a small house on the property so I’m not far in case of an emergency. We do breakfast at seven and I have to say our chef is one of the best on the east coast so even though I know it’s kind of early you won’t want to miss it. Dinner is usually around six every night followed by dessert in the living room. I’m afraid that leaves you all on your own for lunch but the town has some great restaurants and tons of stuff to do. I hope you all enjoy your stay and like I said, if you need anything, I’m just a call away.”

“Thanks, Y/N,” Jensen said with a smile.

“Anytime, Mr. Ackles,” you replied.

“Call me Jensen, please,” he said.

“Ok, Jensen,” you smiled. “Have a goodnight.”

You gave them all another smile and headed back downstairs to help clean up from dessert and get the house back in order before lights out.

As you walked away Jensen couldn’t help but watch you. He was so sure that he would never look at another woman again when Laura had died but somehow he knew that you would be the one to change that. He shook his head and went to unlock his door.

“Get yourselves settled and then maybe we can watch a movie together before bed?” Jensen asked his kids.

Jordan and Lizzie shared a look, both clearly fully aware of how their father was looking at you.

“Rain check,” Lizzie said, “we’re both kind of tired from the drive.”

“Oh,” Jensen said, clearly disappointed though not entirely sure why he was expecting a different answer. “Ok, sure, yeah. You guys get some sleep then. We should get up early for breakfast.”

Jordan and Lizzie agreed that they would be up in time for breakfast and Jensen waited until his kids were in their room safely with the door shut behind them before heading into his own room, all the while trying to figure out why he felt such a strong connection to you.

Forever Tags:  @iwantthedean​ @mrswhozeewhatsis​ @fudging-jefferson-starships​ @chelsea072498​ @dauntlessdiva​ @evyiione​ @xtina2191​ @ellen-reincarnated1967​ @jerkbitchidjitassbutt​ @smoothdogsgirl​ @illisea​ @growningupgeek​ @atc74​ @thing-you-do-with-that-thing​ @musiclovinchic93​

Dean/Jensen Tags: @akshi8278​ @sandlee44​ @anjiep24​ @thisismysecrethappyplace​

[lostlitany]

Master List

Ao3 | Instagram | Main Account

Bad Things Happen Bingo!

Updated on: June 9th, 2022

Hey! Please mind the tags on any of my fics! I enjoy writing angsty and dark themes quite often. Don't Like; Don't read. Stay Safe!

Multi Chapters

Love Like You Incomplete - Teen - 24k - 4/6 Chapters Kiribaku 5+1 5 times Kirishima showed Bakugou how to love others + 1 time Bakugou showed Kirishima how to love himself

Damn Straight Gay Complete - Teen - 36k - 10 Chapters Kiribaku Break-up/Make-up Bakugou takes Kirishima's advice and moves to America for a huge hero work opportunity. After four years of waiting, Kirishima can't handle life without the blond. How is Bakugou supposed to cope once Kirishima gets a new girlfriend?

The Exception Complete - Teen - 50k - 11 Chapters Kiribaku Slow-Burn College-AU When Bakugou gets stuck attending the local community college, he's forced to take a step back and recenter his life. Unfortunately now his future isn't as clear as he thought it was, that is, until he let's it completely change when a certain red-headed beam of sunshine steps into his life and changes him for the better

Irreplaceable Incomplete - Mature - 30k - 3/? Chapters Dadzawa as seen through the eyes of 1-A Aizawa ends up in the hospital after yet another villain attack, and class 2-A is left to fend for themselves while the adults start doing more harm than good

When Light Breaks Through The Rain Complete - Teen - 15k - 5 Chapters Baku-Centric LGBTQIA fic When Bakugou accidentally comes out to his mom, he finds himself on the street. So... He calls the only person he can really ask for help

Silent Gossip Complete - Mature - 56k - 13 Chapters Bakusquad self-therapy Once the class moves into the dorms, Mina is determined to provide some kind of stability to her friends. No matter who you are, or what you need; Mina's door is always open.

Series

The Fox Prince - Incomplete Kiribaku Swan Princess AU

Not My Idea Complete - Teen - 17k - 4 Chapters When you're forced to spend summer after summer together for over a decade, some kind of relationship is bound to form, right? Far Longer Than Forever Incomplete - Mature - 13k - 3/? Chapters When things go wrong, things go wrong. Left in the wilderness to fend for himself Bakugou has to navigate back to his home while under a curse. Kirishima is bound and determined to figure out how his new powers work so he can help rescue the missing prince.

One Shots

Unconditional Teen - 10k - Mitsuki's Parenting Mitsuki hasn't always been the best parent, but Bakugou knows her heart's in the right place. It's her head that needs help-

Unrequited Teen - 650 - Kiribaku How do you feel around someone you love when you know there's no way they'll ever love you back?

Dance Like You Don't Know Someone's Watching General - 340 - Shinkami He couldn't be blamed for this. It wasn't his fault. It was a sick combination of ADHD and unfortunate timing.

Eye Contact Teen - 1k - Baku-Centric Of course, he always wanted to be the center of attention… just, not like this.

Left Out Teen - 4k - Baku-Centric When months go by and he doesn't get to spend any quality time with his friends, Bakugou begins to doubt that he even has friends.

Try Me Teen - 4.5k - Kami-Centric / Baku-Centric The girls just always look really pretty. They look so delicate and pretty when they get to dress up in their skirts and dresses on Saturdays at the dorms. Maybe it was weird, but he wanted to look delicate and pretty too.

Unlisted // (BTHB) Mature - 7.3k - Aizawa-Centric Fresh out of school, Aizawa's ready for his first big undercover assignment. The mission? Infiltrate a villain organization and get on their good side to gather intel for the heroes. The only problem… apparently nobody told the police Aizawa was supposed to be there.

Original Work

Purple Perseverance Complete - Teen - 12.5k - 1 Chapter Cecil Emil Minett A story about growing up, discovering your identity, and the consequences that come with just being yourself.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hey Steph!

Any chance you've got any fics where John and Sherlock come out publicly (an AU or just canon)? For some reason I just adORe the tension

Anyway, thanks for everything you do on your blog, it's hugely appreciated!

Hey Lovely!!

Ahhhh Hmm I thought I had a list for this but apparently not, oof. 

Here’s what I can offer you with my tags in my bookmarks and MFL’s! Feel free to add some, y’all if you have any I missed!

COMING OUT

See also: 

Homophobia / Sexuality / Pride || [John’s Sexuality]

John’s Friends Find Out About Sherlock

John’s Internalized Homophobia

Ex by Itsallfine (T, 1,248 w., 1 Ch. || Angsty Fluff, Love Confessions, Coming Out, Exes, First Kiss, Fake Relationship, Getting Outed) – One night, in the midst of their post-case high and on the cusp of something more, John and Sherlock run into John’s ex. His ex-boyfriend.

Down with this Ship by FrostedFlame (PinkOrchid) (M, 10,862 w., 10 Ch. || For a Case, Gay Bar, Pining, Coming Out, Slow Burn) – Sherlock drags John undercover to a gay bar - for a case, of course - looking forward to seeing John flustered by their surroundings (since you know, he's NOT GAY). John decides that he has hidden both his orientation and his feelings for his daft flatmate for far too long. He is done hiding, time to be honest with his bloody best friend in the world. He just hopes it won't change anything between them. And then it does.

The Pieces That Fall to Earth by Itsallfine (M, 49,513 w., 84 Ch. || S4 Fix-It, Epistolary, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Parentlock, Past Abuse, Coming Out, Internalized Homophobia, Questioning Sexuality, Mental Health Issues / Therapy, Angst, Happy Ending) – John and Sherlock have hit rock bottom, but with all their armor stripped away, they can finally speak honestly, seek healing, and find the truths that matter most. An epistolary post-s4 fix-it fic. Now complete. (This fic is rated T except for one very clearly marked and easily skippable chapter, which is rated M.) Part 1 of The Pieces that Fall to Earth

Performance In a Leading Role by Mad_Lori (E, 156,714 w., 21 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Hollywood / Actor AU, Secret Relationship, Falling in Love, Slow Burn, Romance, Coming Out, Fluff and Angst, Pining) – Sherlock Holmes is an Oscar winner in the midst of a career slump. John Watson is an Everyman actor trapped in the rom-com ghetto. When they are cast as a gay couple in a new independent drama, will they surprise each other? Will their on-screen romance make its way into the real world? Part 1 of Performance in a Leading Role

MARKED FOR LATER

About Being Gay by A_Candle_For_Sherlock (G, 1,088 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4, Coming Out, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, First Kiss, Romantic Fluff, Older Rosie) – Rosie looks up from Sherlock’s picture book about poisonous plants, gives Sherlock a look and asks, 'Are you gay, Sherlock?' and Sherlock, without missing a beat, just says 'Yes,' and continues drinking his tea, and Rosie says 'Ah,' and goes back to her plant book, and John nearly doubles over in the corner.

A Regular not at all Terrifying-for-unknown-reasons Conversation by Dodoa (T, 5,506 w., 1 Ch. || Asexual Sherlock, Unilock, Best Friends, Coming Out, Self-Discovery, Dialogue Heavy, Self Acceptance) – Sherlock is trying to work something out and goes to John for help. John might not have all the answers, but he's determined to help.

Still alive by LoLecter (M, 8,375 w., 1 Ch. || Teenlock AU || Trans!Sherlock, Suicide Attempt, Overdose, Friends to Lovers, Coming Out, Bisexual Character, Fluff, Transphobia, Asshole Parents, Big Brother Mycroft) – Sherlock has known he was transgender for a while now and he decides to come out to his parents, but they react badly and Sherlock end up trying to kill himself only to be saved by his best friend John who doesn't know anything about Sherlock being trans.

Isolated by CarmillaCarmine (G, 8,549, 6/7 Ch. || WiP || Quarantine From Virus, Fluff, Idiots in Love, Bi-Panic, Cuddling & Snuggling, Coming Out, Bathing/Washing, Bubble Bath, Kissing) – Due to an ongoing pandemic, John and Sherlock find themselves isolated at 221B.

Who I Really Am by agirlsname (T, 13,067 w., 1 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE [1] or [2] || Post S4, Bisexuality, Coming Out, Grief/Mourning, POV John, Pining, Sexuality Crisis, Alcoholism, Internalized Homophobia, Angst With Happy Ending) – You don't tend to give up your heterosexual privilege without a fight.

Coming Out by LiviKate (M, 13,439 w., 5 Ch. || Teenlock, Homophobia, Coming Out, Friends to Lovers, Pining John, Oral Sex, Drunk John, Bisexual John, Teen Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Reconciliation, Arguing) – John has had feelings for his best friend for a very long time. Feelings he knows will never be returned. When John goes out to drown his sorrows in booze and girls, he finds himself falling into bed with a man for the first time instead. John doesn't expect Sherlock to think much of it, as he had never cared either way about people's sexualities. But when Sherlock finds out, things go downhill quickly, leaving John confused and alone. Can the two friends come back together after such an explosive coming out? If they do, will it be like before? Or might it be so very, very different?

Straight Boy Pain by Glenmore (NR, 18,257 w., 10 Ch. || Coming Out, Pain, Romance, Birds, Sexuality) – Sherlock is in pain. Billy Kinkaid, the Camden garroter and best man Sherlock knows, diagnoses it. Ademar Silver, a male prostitute in south London, attempts to treat it. Lestrade, kindly Detective Inspector of New Scotland Yard, doesn’t notice it. Eventually, John Watson, healer and registered medical doctor, cures it. And a beautician called Penny paints Sherlock’s toenails.

The Lying Doctor by pagimag (E, 44,285 w., 20 Ch.  || S4 Fix It, Hurt/Comfort, Past Alcohol/Drug Abuse, Anger Issues, Depressed John, Watson Siblings, Coming Out, Bi John, First Time, Dom/Sub Undertones, Parentlock, Internalized Homophobia, Past Child Abuse, Angst With Happy Ending) – Sherlock and John's relationship is fragile after the events at Culverton Smith’s hospital. John struggles with guilt and anger issues. During a case he decides to visit his aunt, which leads to an unexpected development. He’s forced to reevaluate ingrained behaviours, confront long lasting issues and question how he leads his life.

In Bed by Ellipsical (E, 46,922 w., 12 Ch. || Autofellatio, Vibrators, Rimming, Blow Jobs, Coming Out, Liminal Identities, Christmas, Sex Toys, Sexual Fantasy, Fingering, Jealous John, Therapy, Flirting, Texting, Fluff, Sherlock’s Violin, Anal, Est. Rel., Semi-Public Sex, Harry Watson, Communication, Coming in Pants, Spitroasting, Double Penetration, Dirty Talk, Internalized Homophobia, Self-Acceptance, Happy Ending, PTSD John, Coping Mechanisms, Angst, Hurt/Comfort) – It’s almost Christmas, John thinks, and this, this is bullshit. The epilogue to Guilty Secrets. Part 2 of Guilty Secrets

NO! by Tildathings (M, 50,043 w., 36 Ch. || Homophobia, Bed Sharing, Military Uniforms, Past Abuse, Jealous John, Stalking, Violence, First Kiss/Time, Fluff, Pillow Talk, Coming Out, Sherlock’s Past, Shower, Cuddling, Grief and Sorrow, Hugs, Character Death) – Sherlock has been in a coma in over 8 months after he overdosed on the plane at TAB, during which time Mary and Rosie were killed by Vivian Norbury.  This story starts 3 weeks after Sherlock has woken up. John is asking to move back to Baker Street.

What have you done? by Tildathings (M, 63,940+ w., 17/? Ch. || WiP || Interenalized Homophobia, John’s Family, Coming Out, Sherock/OMC, Hugging, Suicide, John Deduce’s, Nightmares, Love Confession, First Date, Bed Sharing, Psychiatry) – John have been invited by Sherlock on a pub night?! Sherlock said to him at Monday that Greg and Mike wanted him to come with them on a pub night. Sherlock is afraid that he would do something wrong socially left alone, so could John come with him? When John arrives at the pub Two Broken Hearts he sees Sherlock talking to a man.

A Change of Heart by SosoHolmesWatson (E, 65,436 w., 20 Ch. || Post-S4 / Canon Compliant, Jealous Sherlock, Past Abuse, Parentlock, Dev. Rel., Idiots in Love, Suicidal Sherlock, Implied / Referenced Drug Use, Mollstrade, Coming Out, Love Confessions, Big Brother Mycroft, John’s Childhood, POV Alternating, First Kiss/Time, Virgin Sherlock, Hand Jobs) – After all they have been through, after all the heartbreak and desolation, John and Sherlock want to make their way back to each other, still convinced that friendship is all that can exist between them. Will there be a change of heart? Part 1 of the The Pains of Growing series

Worst Kept Secrets by Sherlock1110 and sherlockian4evr (M, 61,515+w., 8/? Ch. || WiP || Engagement, Coming Out, Angst and Feels, Homophobia, Idiots in Love, Big Brother Mycroft, Fluff, Scars, Weddings, Honeymoon, Playing Pirates, Parasailing, Archaeology, Paintball, Swimming, Golf) – For the prompt: What if the thing Mycroft did to upset Mummy... was to come out? What if, as a teenager, Mycroft decided to tell his family that he is gay, and his parents disowned him for it? It's okay now, he runs the British Government, he IS the British Government, but there's still that tiny part of him that wants his parent's acceptance, especially now he's found the man he wants to spend the rest of his life with. Part 4 of the Sherlock and Mycroft Fluff series

Sacré Coeur by Mamaorion (M, 95,235 w., 27 Ch. || S4 Fix It Rewrite, First Kiss, UST / RST, Eventual Happy Ending, Coming Out, Holmes Family, Marriage Proposal, Husbands, Healing, Evil Mary, Beekeeping, Caretaker Sherlock, Mind Palace, Alzheimer’s Disease, Protective / Big Brother Mycroft, TD-12) – In this s4 fixit, John must piece together the gaps in his altered memory if he and Sherlock are to face the terror that has plagued Sherlock since childhood. As they untangle the web, seven years of hidden love ignite.

Full Court Press by MissDavis (E, 126,123 w. || College Basketball AU || Unilock, Masturbation, Homophobia, First Kiss / Time, Oral/Anal, Coming Out, Switchlock, Blowjobs) – Sherlock Holmes has accepted a scholarship to play basketball at the College of St. Bartholomew's. He expects to be their star player and turn the team's losing record around. He does not expect to fall in love with the team's captain, a certain scrappy point guard named John Watson. Or: Sherlock is the team's best shooter. John is the team's best ball-handler.

Nine and a Half Weeks by CumberCurlyGirl and Kameo (E, 175,094+ w., 35/? Ch. || WiP || American AU || Different First Meeting, Daddy Kink, Bottomlock, Anal Plug, Riding Crops, Spanking, Light Bondage, Anal/Oral, Aftercare, Posh John, Virgin Sherlock, Homophobia, Sugar Daddy John, Rimming, Coming in Pants, Light Dom/Sub, Past Sherlock / Victor, Light BDSM, Public Sex, John in a Kilt, Vibrators, Happy Ending) – Sherlock Holmes is about to graduate from high school in midwestern America. Despite his intelligence, his prospects are bleak due to poverty, an indifferent, alcoholic father and poor choices. One day, at work, he sells a riding crop to a handsome blonde Brit and his life is changed. He doesn't know what hit him - until he does. This is a story of a journey to love and self-acceptance and explores many themes along the way: drug abuse, grief, coming out, age difference, consent. Lots of sex but so much more.

Of Ice and Men by SinceWhenDoYouCallMe_John (E, 176,906 w., 20 Ch. || Olympics AU || Paralympics, Prosthesis, Disability, Established Relationship, Threesome - Johnlockstrade, Angst with Happy Ending, Coming Out, Secret Relationship, Asexuall Sherlock, Pilot John) – Greg wants Sherlock to win his first Olympic Gold medal. Sherlock wants John to win his first Olympic Gold medal. John wants Greg to come to bed wearing all four of his Olympic Gold medals, and you didn't really think this would be that terribly serious after reading that title, did you? Bundle up, it's a Winter Olympics OT3!

Radioactive Trees In A Red Forest by Maribor_Petrichor (E, 280,251 w., 73 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-S4, Suicidal Ideations, Alcohol / Rx Drug Abuse, Coming Out / Bisexual John, Seizures, Past/Referenced/Implied Child Abuse, Hallucinations, Rehab, Celibacy, Sobriety / Relapse, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Grief/Mourning, Psychological Trauma, Nice /Not Anti-Mary, John’s POV, Parentlock, First Time, Angst, Switchlock, Angst with Happy Ending) – John Watson is what happens when a man can no longer see a reason to go on. John Watson is what happens when a man starts to let go. "It is what it is." John Watson is what happens when what "it is" becomes too much to bear. This is a story of the life, death, and resurrection of John Hamish Watson.

[avungerthatgotaway]

It all started when...

A/N: hey guys!! i'm back with new oneshot. this one includes mentions of bullying too. i have a lot of ideas about bullied reader, prolly cuz i was bullied myself, and i kinda find inspiration of it now😂

Summary: Russo brothers "host a show" for avengers cast, and they see beginings of cast in MCU.

Warnings: my broken humor (this is a HUGE warning), mention of bullying but not angsty way

Set anytime between Age of ultron and Infinity war.

You were at the show Russo brothers "hosted". It was basically occasional game between avengers cast they would post on youtube, but oh well.

There were: Evans, Mackie, Sebastian, Tom Hiddleston, Scar, RDJ, Renner, Hemsworth and you. As only teen actress on the team, everyone wanted to sit next to you. This time, however, you were between Seb and Tom. Evans was next to Seb, while Renner and Hemsworth were still bickering about who will sit next to Tom.

There was also a huge monitor across from huge sofa you were on.

Joe and Antony were yet to tell you what's going on.

"Soooo" Joe started after introducing everyone to camera. "tonight we are going to go to the beginnings of the avengers cast. Specifically events between employing them, and telling the world about their roles."

All of you looked confused, so Anthony continiued.

"MCU has a certain policy, where we do not allow actors to immidiately talk about their roles. So to ensure this for the lead role actors, we hire some kind of, let's say private detectives. They basically film you in public places, for evidence if you break the contract."

Everyone was staring at them in shock. You were shocked, how did you never notice?

"So, tonight we are gonna see a few funny incidents. Of course none of you told anything, you wouldn't be here tonight if you did."

"So let's start. Chris, you had hard time hiding your role from your brother Scott, didn't you?"

and the madness began

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|||||||timeskip cuz why not|||||||

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You just finished watching a particulary funny video, where Sebastian had to tell him mum he didn't get the role. She was threatening to beat up Russo brothers with a broomstick, claiming that "MY SEBBY IS THE BEST ONE THEY WILL EVER GET!".

The laughter died down, and they moved on.

"Y/N." Joe began. Ah, it was your time. You couldn't wait to see what do they have in store for you.

"You are the youngest of the avengers cast. You were 1st year of high school when you got this role, correct?"

"Yes." you said with a smile.

"We know that only you and one more girl from your town auditioned, and both got roles. Her role wasn't big, crossing the street in Spider Man movie. But yours is one of the most important. How did your friends find out you were both accepted?"

"Well, you posted actors statistics. And you wrote there were 2 kids from (your/hometown). You said one was the lead role, and other was not. They knew it was only us 2 on auditions, so it was pretty obvious. I didn't tell anything tho." you said. It wasn't easy speaking about other girl, since she was your biggest bully. But you didn't want to talk about that, so you went on with the story.

"We know you didn't. The other girl was very hard to cope with, from what we saw." on this Tom Hiddleston, Seb and 2 Chrises turned their heads towards you, faces laced with concern. You didn't look at them, hoping video wouldn't show too much. You never told your castmates about bullying, thinking you'd annoy them or something.

"Let's watch it, then." your train of toughts was stopped when Anthony turned on the big screen again, video starting to play.

You were in school, sitting on a bench with your friends, who were bothering you to admit that you got the lead role in MCU.

"But I didn't! I told you. I'm just an extra, what is so hard to believe in that?" you answered for 100th time that day. You couldn't tell them the truth, out of fear of getting fired before anything even started.

"Oh, nothing except that (your/bullys/name) got the lead role then." your b/f/n retorted.

"Cmon, Y/N, you really want us to believe that? That they would choose mindless, dumb bully instead if you." other friend of yours asked.

"How would they know she is bullying me? Why would they care after all, that's of none importance out there. But maybe she is better actress? Or they just like her better? There's nothing wrong with that."

Your friends didn't even get to answer that when (your/bully's/name) walked by, bragging about her lead mcu role (she didn't get) to anyone who wanted to listen. And there were plenty of people who wanted to. She knew you couldn't say anything, so she lied to everyone, saying she got the lead role. You and your friends cought a little bit of her "filming adventures". (filming wasn't even started then)

"...and then after Sebby showed up in my trailer, he kissed me so passionately. You see my make up is smeared, right? It was him."

"But didn't you say you got home yesterday afternoon?" one girl questioned.

"Oh, but he was just so passionate, I couldn't take it off. He texted me this morning, saying he couldn't take my lipstick off either. Tomorrow I have a kissing scene with Tom Hiddleston to shoot. And oh my God, that Chris Evans was just starring at me the WHOLE time. I think he likes me..." and their conversation faded away as they went on.

Your friends were giving you pointed looks.

"Okay can you now see why we don't believe you?" one of them asked.

You just stared helplessly at them,trying to think of an excuse.

"I'm just gonna. Go. Homework and some other stuff that I'm totally not using to get out of this conversation." you said, now half joking, knowing that if there was a hope of them believing you, it was now gone.

The video ended, everyone laughing their heads off at the stupidity of that girl.

"I just want to declare that I kissed no minors in anyone's trailer." Sebastian said seriously, after laughing.

"And I didn't ogle anyone." Evans added.

"And I most definately didn't shoot a kissing scene with minor, ever." Hiddleston piped up.

"I think that is pretty clear. We found out later on, that her family payed, just so she could pass by in movie since she was so untalented. Since then, we have to watch over every cast member's audition, no matter how small their role is." Joe said.

You laughed some more, and then watched RDJ's oldest son and his reaction.

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|||||||timeskip again cuz me lazy|||||||

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You and other cast members went for drinks afterwards. They all took some cocktails, and you were sipping your orange juice. Suddenly you felt a hand on your shoulder. It was Evans, looking kinda serious.

"In that videk your friends mentioned bullying. Why didn't you tell anyone that you were getting bullied?" he asked. Suddenly all eyes were on you.

"Well, it just didn't seem like a big thing. I didn't want to bother anyone with my petty problems." you said and smiled a little.

"Kiddo, you ain't bothering us. we are family here, we talk aboyt everything. Please ask for help if you ever need it." Jeremy said.

Everyone else voiced their agreement. You talked a little more about it, but then started joking around, talking about random stuff. The night was great, and you were happy to have them there with you.

[jaminjims]

foreign bts 8th member {imagine}

anon request: Hi! I love your imagines!! Can I request a relationships with the members or life of a 16 year old foreign 8th member with ot7? headcanon or imagine (whichever you feel like) thank you!!!

a/n: thank you so so much for requesting bub! i loved writing this one (even though it is a little rushed) it made me think differently about some aspects of idol life, especially when looking at it from a foreigners point of view. but i really appreciate you anon, you will forever by remembered as my first requester so i really hope you enjoy this one love! ♡ 

pairing: platonic bts x foreign gender neutral!reader (i do have you refer to the older members as hyung though) 

genre: not gonna lie, this one is pretty angsty because it deals with my experiences of how the kpop community reacts to foreign idols/young idols (that being said, not everything will be completely accurate!) but don’t worry! there are still some fluffy moments (the members just love you so much and want to protect you from the world) 

warnings: bullying, loneliness, unhealthy coping mechanisms and destructive mentality 

words: 2.6k

[disclaimer: when writing idol aus, i will only be focusing on the struggles of the reader, not of the idols themselves because i don’t personally know what struggles they go through and how they handle them.] 

~**~

you were the youngest, and that really sucked sometimes 

like for the fact that the members practically hovered over you and made sure that you were doing your school work correctly and actually completing it rather than putting it in the garbage disposal (which might've happened before) but hey! all the other members were pretty much finished with their schooling so it wasn’t fair the you still had to do yours 

you have made that point multiple times only for the others to shut it down because you could basically make pockets with how full of holes that logic had

or when they fussed over you a little to much, “y/n, you’re not too stressed right?” “you’re sleeping enough right, maknae?” “here eat this, it’ll help you grow.”

you also found it hard in the beginning to really connect with anyone too. the drastic age difference between you and the others was intimidating and it didn’t help that you joined the group three years after they first debuted so everyone was pretty much like family and there you were, kinda just stuck in group that you felt like an outsider in 

not to mention that you painfully stood out from them because for god sake’s you weren’t even korean 

they didn’t know how to approach you either though. you were (still are) young and stubborn and had almost too much energy that you didn’t know what to do with 

and even putting the group problems aside, school was also very difficult for you

your parents abruptly moved you to korea when you were young because of an amazing job opportunity so you were thrust into a schooling society that wasn’t the best 

hell, you didn't even know korean the first two years you spent there 

you were just... different in so many ways and that’s hard on a growing child. some of your first memories were of children laughing and pushing you because you ‘looked weird’ and ‘couldn't speak.’ 

and you pretty much had to deal with that kind of treatment all throughout middle school and even a little bit of high school (even after you had learned korean) 

it was difficult for you to really be accepted by a society that would always see you as an outsider 

so you grew up a rebellious angsty teen who was hard to really connect to because you were just so used to deflecting others opinions of yourself 

and you just so happened to have a passion for dancing and singing (you were also pretty good at rapping) and that was enough to have bighit take a chance on this kid who was barely passing school 

despite what everyone said about training and all the complaints about it, you actually loved it 

you thrived in the type of environment where you had to constantly push yourself to be seen because you had always been pushed aside for how you looked and how you talked 

sure, you missed your parents a whole lot and being a preteen only magnified that feeling, but in this dance studio, in this recording studio, is where you could really stand out in the best way possible and make an impact 

you would show all the people that it was ok to be different, that you could still make it in a society that prioritized their beauty standards and had a set precedent for how you had to look 

you were going to be the one to break stereotypes and actually do something   

but it was because you were pushed so hard growing up, that you set ridiculously high standards for yourself and because of your mentality, if you didn’t reach those goals then you would practically hate and loathe yourself until you pushed yourself to do better 

you grew to have this close looped mentality that was ridiculously unhealthy, but as long as you could prove yourself and succeed, right?

it was that mentality that placed you on bts and when you got the announcement that holy shit, you were going to be the eighth member? you had cried for the first time since you started training

and even though it was a group that was already formed, you went in the confidence in yourself that you would make your group members proud

but that brought the age difference back into play. it had always been the older kids that had picked on you, and you were defensive at first 

it made you all the more motivated to seek their approval though, to make sure that they had no reason to see you as different from them, despite the way you looked and how old you were

and it was probably that fire in your eyes that drew them in

you were this little stubborn ball of energy that would concur anything in your path and still push yourself to do more 

it was oddly through school work (the dreaded work) and your age that brought you guys closer 

they could tell when you were struggling to get work done, and losing sleep over it. it would be the little things that gave it away, like you leaving your toothbrush out or you not putting up the clothes that were washed 

and they each saw themselves in you; burning determination, ready to go up against anything. refusing to ask for help even though you needed it 

so it started with namjoon

he would look in your school bag while on break in dance practice and write the answers to some of your school work on sticky notes and then put them back in your bag 

you would find them later on and frown but accept the help anyways because you really were struggling 

and then it would be jimin leaving you snacks in your room with encouraging notes and you would be lying if you said that didn’t help you through some tough times (you still have the notes today, but no one needed to know that)

and sometimes there were playlists that would just kind of show up on your phone that were made for relaxation and studying and something in you knew that it was yoongi’s doing 

and overtime, through the tiny gestures, they broke down your walls and you let them see a side of you that no one really ever got to see because of the circumstances that you grew up in 

but you were still stubborn, and refused to accept their help if they asked for it directly. which actually led to more fights than you would think

they would scold you for working yourself to hard and you would say “no, i need this exercise.” to which would lead to actual demands from them and refusals from you because its your goddamn mentality working at your confidence again 

right after you were officially announced as the eighth member, that’s probably when your personality shifted the most 

remember when i mentioned about how they fuss over you too much? this was the main reason why 

your looks. it always had to boil down to your looks and it was different when it was only school bullies making the taunting, but when your face was up for debate by the media, is when you got really fired up 

“bts adopts an outsider?” “it’s called k-pop for a reason, go back to your own country.” “is this seriously happening right now? i’m un-stanning.” “wth, y/n’s like, five. thats gross.”

it was these comments and articles that really got to you, but somewhere along the lines it wasn’t just you anymore, it was about your members and what they had already built for themselves  

you had let yourself start caring for them because they treated you like an equal and now you were only hurting them 

they noticed, when you started to spend more time at the gym and studio and they were informed that your grades dramatically dropped because you were so hyper focused on getting better that you were ignoring your own needs 

it was jungkook that finally said something to you after about two weeks of almost radio silence because goddammit he had actually gotten used to your presence and you couldn’t just leave because he would miss you to much 

they all would 

they thought that you would lash out at them when they confronted you about it, but what you did surprised them and you cried for the first time ever in any of their presences

because these people, your hyung’s, where suffering from the backlash that you created and you could see how it was affecting them and it seemed like all the trust and all the hard time spent trying to seek their approval was all flushed away now and you had worn yourself down so much that there was just a kid left who was scared 

so, so scared 

scared because you were different, scared because you had lost the people that you had grown to care for 

so when jungkook came into the practice room to see you leaning against the mirror with your head in your hands, he knew that something had changed 

and when he called out for you, you didn’t answer. this pattern repeated until he was left so worried that he started shaking you and he had to call the hyung’s

it was only when they opened the door and you made eye contact with hoseok that you started to tear up and then it was like the dam that was holding years worth of fear and hardships back just ... broke 

you clung to jungkook and just start sobbing and apologizing because all you wanted was to be seen and accepted but not at this high of a cost

and they were relieved. they had thought that you would close yourself off from them and shut them out, but it seemed like you were worried about that same thing as well 

jin and taehyung almost cried themselves and it took everything in hoseok to stop himself from draping you in a blanket and protecting you from the world because you were still so young and you didn’t deserve the hate you got. you were only sixteen and there was only so much one person could take 

you were small enough to get picked up and since you hadn’t been eating much, jungkook picked you up easily 

and you didn’t protest as he carried you out of the practice room and into the van that they usually shared

you were drained and tired and worn out and just overall exhausted because you never really showed any emotion except determination, if that could even count 

and even though you were all close enough that you shared meals and acted like siblings, you still surprised them everyday and showed a new part of yourself and they just found themselves growing more fond of you 

once you all piled into the van, jin driving with namjoon in the passenger seat, you looked up at jungkook, (you were still held against him, practically in his lap) and then looked back at the rest of them and what they heard almost made their heart stop, “i love you hyung’s” 

there was SO MUCH to unpack in that one statement when it came to you 

first of all, you had called them all hyung’s, which you hadn't done until now. always opting to add -ssi at the end of their names 

and maybe it was strange to be proud of that tile, but when it came to you, it showed that you really did trust them with anything and they knew how hard that was for you 

then you said ‘i love you.’ it still didn’t really process in their heads until they had gotten you to your bed (you had fallen asleep during the car ride back) and they were all sitting around in the living room 

“you guys heard that too, right?” hoseok murmured 

then slowly yoongi smiled that gummy smile of his and everyone’s face’s did the same because you really had become special to them, even if you did come in late to the group 

and oh if that didn’t trigger their protective side

they saw it as their personal mission to out you back together and build yourself up again because you were worth it and you did deserve to be here 

they started with getting rid of electronics, well at least for you 

they were going to try to separate you from the media for as long as they could because people were ruthless 

they also made a point to start posting more solo videos of you on their youtube channel, so the audience would actually be able to see past your ‘foreign’ face and look at your real personality (they even started posting things without the companies approval but would never tell you that because you were already rebellious enough) 

and their planned kinda worked, too 

and even if you still weren't accepted by many, more and more of the fandom was accepting you everyday and that meant something

at least one of them would be with you at all times (which actually kinda got on your nerves sometimes but you knew they were trying to help and you wanted to change, to grow, to make it easier on them) 

taehyung started giving you more and more of his clothes (which you loved sleeping in) and started to use you as his cuddle buddy more times than not because you were the “precious maknae that should be protected at all costs.” “but do i really need to be your body pillow, hyung? at this rate i think your the one who will kill me and then i’ll need protection from you.” “yah, go to sleep.” he would flick your forehead and then you would mutter ow under your breath but go to sleep anyway because you were actually pretty comfortable 

or when seokjin would call you into the kitchen just to try his food and you would groan at having to get up from where you were but in reality you actually looked forward to it because he really was so good at cooking 

and so it becomes kind of like a routine for everyone and they all take care of you in their own way and your quick to try and help them back, even if comes of across as a little weird and distant

like when you would always bring extra water bottles to rehearsal because you know hobi will dance the hardest and you would get worried that he might become dehydrated 

or every other night you would bring water to jimin with a honey cough drop because those are his favorite and it helps to sooth his throat after a long day of training

you also make an effort to contribute to the songs. so you start tagging along with namjoon and yoongi when they go off to their studios because you are also interested in producing and you would like to learn someday and they are all to eager to show you how 

and you actually make an effort to ask for help when you need it (which is kinda big for you) and jungkook is the one who helps more than not 

they didn’t give you time to build your walls back up again and even though you often slip back into the mindset that you consonantly need to work for approval, they are there to tell you that you don’t need to do that because you already make them proud and that you already do work enough 

you are enough. they see you and believe in you 

and really, that’s all you needed, but it was a relief when you started to be widely accepted by the fans 

but you’re here, you were enough 

and although its not always good all time, and at times when you don’t feel like you belong, your hyung’s remind you that they are your family, and that no matter your face or where you come from, you will always belong with them 

[end]

end note: holy cow, this was just a mess of emotions and i think i might have some sort of trauma i don’t know about because sad who?? apparently i know her very well. but i’m really happy with the ending even though everything in between is messy! anon if you’re reading this, thank you so much for this kind of prompt! it really got me to think differently and put me in a position where i had to really delve deep into negative and positive mental patterns and how its impacted based on how a person grows up 

also I REALLY LOOKED UP IF JIN HAD A LICENSE AT THREE AM IN THE MORNING JUST TO WRITE THREE WORDS ABOUT IT and i just?? find that really funny for some reason?? i don’t know man, i need to get more sleep, so i apologize for any errors. i love ya’ll 

~**~ masterlist 

request something! 

taglist: @boba-tea1206​ 

[canislupus-exe]

Everybody Talks | richie tozier

>> gif credit to @/arcticbandguy-archive on tumblr <<

fandom | It: Chapter One

character | (18) Richie Tozier

reader | they/them (she ver.)(he ver.)

requested | Anonymous, @wolfhard-tozier, @wukindly, @beepbeeprichtozier

warnings | Underage drinking, mentions of off-screen sex, mentions of drugs, cursing, slightly angsty

word count | 2,574

keys | (Y/n) = Your name, (M/f/n) = Male friend’s name, (g/n) = guardian’s noun (mom, dad, grandma…etc), (s/h/t) = she, he, or they, (L/n) = Last name, (B/f/n) = Best friend’s name, (h/h/t) = her, his, or their

song | Everybody Talks - Neon Trees

summary | can you do a richie x reader with the song everybody talks by neon trees? thanks

>> back to prev <<

Keep reading

Hey baby won’t you look my way

I can be your new addiction

>><<

Richie Tozier had been trying to get your attention for God knows how many years. He had known you since kindergarten and had been infatuated with you since the third grade. His crush was obvious to his three friends but otherwise, he kept it well hidden. Years passed, and three more people became his close friends in the eighth grade. One moved, and one was homeschooled, so it was mostly limited to five people who teased him about it.

And then high school came around. Ah, high school. The four years of parties, alcohol, drugs, and sex. Richie was a “troubled teen” in the eyes of adults, but he was doing just fine when he looked at himself in the mirror. The parties weren’t necessarily a bad thing. The alcohol, sure, it was illegal and gave him horrible hangovers but he wasn’t hurting anyone. Drugs were a bit of an overstatement. He didn’t do anything hardcore. Just pot and the very occasional ecstasy, and cigarettes if you count that as drugs.

The sex though. The sex is surprisingly the one thing that actually fucked him up. Sex was his way to cope if you will. Sex distracted him. It distracted him from his parents, from school, from you. And even then, it was never enough. Today had been a horrible day for him. He saw you hanging out with (M/f/n). You were always hanging out with (M/f/n) but today seemed different. He didn’t know how or why he just knew it was.

So, he called some friends. He found a party. He drank his sorrows away and he smoked his joints. The music was loud and there was just one thing he was missing. Sex. He needed it. He craved it. And while your body was the only one that would truly satisfy him, he knew he could not have it. So he would settle for the pretty person who was standing a few feet away from him.

>><<

Hey, baby what you gotta say?

All you’re giving me is fiction

>><<

“Excuse me, baby?” Richie slurred out quietly. They looked over their shoulder and laughed quietly.

“Well hello there. How can I help you, sir?” They asked. He blinked, attempting to focus their face but the alcohol was just messing with his brain. He smiled.

“I couldn’t help but notice how stunning you looked tonight. Do you have a name?” He asked. They laughed.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” They replied. Richie laughed.

“Well if you won’t tell me your name, I guess I’ll just have to call you mine.” He whispered. They gave a laugh that was sweeter than sugar. One that seemed to make his entire body yearn to hear it as much as humanly possible.

“Smooth.” They replied. He smiled.

“I try.” He said with a shrug. He watched as their eyes moved to the center of the room.

“Dance with me.” They said, grabbing his hand and not waiting for an answer.

>><<

I’m a sorry sucker and this happens all the time

I found out that everybody talks

Everybody talks, everybody talks

>><<

Richie smiled and watched as they moved their body to the beat. He licked his lips before coming up behind them and slowly getting into the vibe with them. He smiled and placed his hands on their hips, dancing to the rhythm of the loud music he couldn’t recognize. He didn’t notice several eyes on him or the whispers that were carrying around the room. All he could hear was their laugh, all he could see was their body, all he could feel was their hot breath.

>><<

It started with a whisper

And that was when I kissed her

>><<

“Can I take you to a room?” Richie whispered, leaning close to their ear. He heard their laugh.

“You’re more impatient than I thought.” They replied, turning around and wrapping their arms around his neck. He smirked.

“Can you blame me with the way you’re moving?” He replied. It was their turn to smirk now.

“Show me what you’ve got and I might think about it.” They whispered, grazing their lips over his.

Richie pressed back hungrily. He moved a hand to their cheek and pulled their face closer. Their lips tasted like Hennesy and Coke. Their breath smelled like fresh mint gum. They were softer than the finest silk and they enticed him in every way. He wanted more. He needed more.

>><<

And then she made my lips hurt

I could hear the chit chat

>><<

They began to kiss back harder, pushing their body as close to his as they could get. Their lust seemed to be taking over just as much as Richie’s was. They let their hands crawl up his neck and into his hair, pulling on the roots and eliciting a moan from him. His breathing became heavy and his insides were churning. He felt his pants become tighter as they lightly bit his lip.

Several voices could be heard but he didn’t care. They were his only worry. He was wrapped up in their entire being, intoxicated by their very existence. Nobody had ever done this to him. He didn’t know who they were but maybe they could be the one who finally distracted him from you. Permanently.

>><<

Take me to your love shack

Mamas always gotta back track

When everybody talks back

>><<

They pulled away, panting and licking their lips. Richie opened his eyes, his breathing heavy and his vision still fuzzy. He swallowed.

“Can we go to that room now?” They asked quietly. Richie smirked and grabbed their hand, leading them away from the crowd and into a room he knew was unoccupied. He pushed the door open and shut it quickly behind them. He fumbled with the lock for a few seconds before smiling in satisfaction as he heard the click. He wasted no more time and slid off his jacket, then his shirt. He could feel their eyes on his well-toned chest.

“God my (g/n) would kill me if (s/h/t) knew what I was doing.”

>><<

Hey, honey, you could be my drug

You could be my new prescription

>><<

Richie groaned as he opened his eyes, the light pouring through the window. His head was pounding from his hangover and he felt like someone was kicking him in the forehead. He sighed before sitting up, the pain becoming worse as he elevated himself. His vision was blurred, but this time it was because he wasn’t wearing his glasses, not the alcohol.

He looked down at the person he had slept with. He could still smell their scent on his skin. He could still feel their body on his. He could still taste their chapstick on his lips. He wanted to get their number, their name, or even just a clear look at their face. Anything. Anything at all. But he knew that wasn’t how these things worked.

So he turned away from their bare body, got dressed, and walked out. He didn’t know who he was walking away from and he prayed to God they didn’t know who was walking away. They didn’t, but it would not be the last time he heard from them.

>><<

Too much could be an overdose

All this trash talk make me itchin’

>><<

You were on his mind all day every day, but today was different. He was thinking about them. The person he had slept with. The person whose name he didn’t even know. The person who took his mind off you, someone who he was always thinking of. He wished he had gotten some form of information on them. Anything at all, but the deed had already been done.

The next day at school, things felt off. People seemed to be whispering about him more. Sure, there were always rumors but it seemed like everyone was partaking this time around. When he walked the halls everyone turned and mumbled under their breath and he couldn’t help but wonder what this was all about.

“Do any of you know what’s up?” He asked, walking to the farthest table in the lunchroom. Stan looked at him before rolling his eyes.

“There he is, the talk of Derry, Maine.” He replied. Richie raised his eyebrows.

“Would anyone care to elaborate,” Richie said, setting his tray on the table.

“That’s weird. We thought you’d be talking your ass off about it.” Eddie said, picking at his food.

“Talking my ass off about what?” Richie asked.

“The person you slept with at the party last night,” Mike said. Richie furrowed his brows.

“The person I slept with? I don’t even know who I slept with last night!” Richie shouted. Bill choked on the milk he was drinking.

“Y-Y-You don’t?” He asked.

“No!” Richie replied. Everyone exchanged looks.

“It was (Y/n).”

>><<

Oh my my

Everybody talks, everybody talks

Everybody talks, too much

>><<

Richie’s eyes widened.

“(Y/n)?” He asked. They gave him blank stares.

“You mean you didn’t know who you fucked? Do you know how unsanitary that is? They could have an STD Richie! Honestly, do you even-”

“Shut up Eddie.” Stanley interrupted, not wanting to hear Eddie’s dawdling. Eddie glared.

“I… I had sex.. with (Y/n)?” Richie asked. Nods went around.

No wonder the person had consumed his every thought. So much so that forgot about you. You and they were the same person. Richie Tozier had drunk sex with (Y/n) (L/n) and he didn’t even realize. He wouldn’t have even realized it if it wouldn’t have been for the student body and their insatiable urge to talk about everything.

>><<

It started with a whisper

And that was when I kissed her

>><<

You watched as the people pointed at you and whispered under their breath. You began chewing on your nails, knowing exactly what they were talking about. Yesterday you woke up in an unfamiliar bed, in an unfamiliar house, naked, and with a sore groin. You had lost your virginity and were so drunk you couldn’t remember who had taken it. You felt gross, especially with the way people were talking about you.

You walked to the cafeteria, sitting down with your friends and trying to remember what happened last night. You remembered going to a party with your best friend, drinking, drinking some more, dancing, kissing someone, then having sex, but for the love of God, you couldn’t remember who you had sex with.

“(Y/n), there you are!” Someone shouted. You looked over your shoulder and saw your best friend running up to you.

“Oh, hey (B/f/n).” You replied, wincing at the loudness of (h/h/t) voice.

“Is it true?” (S/h/t) asked. You raised your eyebrows as (s/h/t) sat down.

“Is what true?” You asked.

“Did you really sleep with Richie?” (S/h/t) asked. Your eyes widened.

“Richie…?” You trailed off. You couldn’t have slept with the person you had been crushing on for eight years and not remember it, right?

>><<

And then she made my lips hurt

I could hear the chit chat

>><<

You had to find him. With all the talking, he was bound to have heard if he didn’t remember. You stood up from the table but paused. What if he didn’t remember, and didn’t want to? What if you were just… Another person on his list? What if he didn’t even care that he was your first? You sat back down, swallowing before looking at your plate.

“(Yn)?” (B/f/n) asked quietly. You looked up and smiled.

“Y-yeah?” You asked.

“Are you okay?” (S/h/t) replied. You cleared your throat before nodding.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

>><<

Take me to your love shack

Mamas always gotta back track

When everybody talks back

>><<

Richie spent the entire day trying to talk to you, but it seemed like you were avoiding him on purpose. He knew it had to do with the one-night stand but even if you hated him for it, he just had to talk to you. Yet all day, he couldn’t get a hold of you. You were always gone by the time he was able to get close enough.

>><<

Never thought I’d live

To see the day

When everybody’s words got in the way

>><<

The day had ended and you sat on your bed, thinking about everything that happened. Richie Tozier took your virginity. Richie Tozier, the boy you had had a crush on since fifth grade and now you couldn’t even think about him without wanting to cry. The words of the student body made you think about him though. The fact that no matter who the person was, he always forgot about them. You would be no different.

Your (g/n) was out on a business trip, so you were alone. You were glad, you knew (s/ht) would try asking what was wrong and you were in no state to explain. Your eyes were red and puffy from crying and you just felt like sinking into your bed and never leaving. Yet someone knocked on your door and ruined your peace. You got up from your spot and sighed as you walked to answer the door. You opened it and a look of surprise crossed your face as you saw Richie Tozier standing there.

“R-Richie! What are you doing here?” You asked, quickly wiping your eyes, Richie stared.

“Have you been crying?” He asked. You blinked before clearing your throat.

“Yeah uh… I was watching a sad movie. Why are you… Why are you here?” You asked. Richie looked at his feet before sighing.

“I wanted to talk about Thomas’s party.” He replied. You stared at him, more shock and surprise overcoming you.

“Thomas’ party? Why?” You asked, trying to sound nonchalant. Richie looked at you.

“Haven’t you heard?” He asked. It was your turn to stare at your feet.

“Uh… Yeah. We had sex.” You replied.

“Do you… Do you regret it?” He asked, his voice quiet.

>><<

Hey sugar show me all your love

All you’re giving me is friction

Hey, sugar what you gotta say?

>><<

“Do I regret losing my virginity when I was drunk and in a state where I wouldn’t be able to remember how it felt? Yes. Do I regret losing it to you? No, and it’s weird because I know I should.” You said.

“I’m not quite sure I understand.” He replied. You frowned.

“You’re Richie Tozier. You’re infamous for giving people the night of their lives and then forgetting about them the very next day, leaving them with a broken heart. Yet here I am, well aware of that fact and still hoping that I might be different. Hoping that I hadn’t wasted eight years of my life loving someone who would forget my name in an instant.”

“Did you… Did you say eight years?”

“Yes, eight years Richie! For eight years I’ve been so insanely in love with you but do you think that would matter. No, it wouldn’t. You know why? Because-”

>><<

It started with a whisper

And that was when I kissed her

>><<

Your words got caught in your throat as your lips were sealed. Richie kissed you. It was incredible and familiar. It was magical, his lips moving with yours in perfect rhythm. Something you had waited on for what seemed like forever, and it was worth every second. To think, you had kissed him like this before and couldn’t remember it. How amazing it felt. He pulled away, his breathing heavy and warm on your skin.

>><<

And then she made my lips hurt

I could hear the chit chat

>><<

You stared at him, moving your hand to touch your lips.

“You… You kissed me.” You whispered. Richie leaned his head onto your shoulder.

“I’ve loved you for 11 years.” He replied.

>><<

Take me to your love shack

Mamas always gotta back track

When everybody talks back

>><<

You laughed quietly before wrapping your arms around him.

“Thank God for all those people who run their mouths at school.” You said. Richie nodded.

“Thank God everybody talks.”

>><<

Everybody talks, everybody talks

Everybody talks, everybody talks

Everybody talks, everybody talks back

It started with a whisper

And that was when I kissed her

Everybody talks, everybody talks back

[sukirichi]

hi suki! wanted to tell you this bc i have no one else to talk about it with ><

( you can answer this when the English chapter releases! i was able to read it because my friend bought the WSJ issue)

I was trying to udnerstand Naoy's character, so I was reding everything from CH138-151 again. I'm kinda sad at how people just calls Naoya a Toji fanboy (though true LMAO) and not realizing how Toji really influenced his persona. Like the admiration Naoya held for Toji is so deeply engraved in him that he, who was called a genius sorcerer as a child, looks up to a man who was called a failure. Toji is probably the only man in the clan that he respected, that's why toji's level of strength became his "picture" to follow. And I think a lot of who Naoya has become is because the Zen'ins literally groomed the decency out of him. Still, though groomed to be everything he is, he himself chose not to change anything about it.

(wait but also?? little naoya looks cute like he would guide old ladies on the ped xing so what the fuck happened after that)

I guess one major reason why he does not respect anyone else in the clan (besides his superiority complex) is because of the Zen'in's concept of what is marked as strong. Like, the way they see and treated him as if he's the best sorcerer in the making, yet failing to see Toji's powers and rejecting him fully. It's something similar to Mai when she said "Maki has talent that I don't. And the clan rejected that; that talent that I lacked", except Naoya is raised to be a confident (arrogant?) child, thus he takes it as a challenge instead and works to achieve it.

So, when Maki reached the level of Toji, I think his reaction wasn't simply stemmed on his "fanboy" antics, but his desperation of being part of that level of strength. I think he's more irritated in the fact that Maki, someone who he does not see anywhere near as strong as he is (though he does say Maki is strong in chapter 138), reached a level of strength that he hasn't; that he is trying hard to achieve. It's also the same with having your favorite superhero getting defeated. And Naoya's in denial that there is someone else who could be the same as Toji.

I like how he's an antagonist that was not build under the foundation of a sob backstory (though it was a v small sneak peak of his background and was mainly centered with his admiration for toji, plus I think people forget that Naoya is an antagonist), how he acknowledges that he has not reached that level of strength. Of course, I'm angsty about his misogynistic ideals. I get that he's from a very traditionalist clan so... yeah. I mean, no child is born evil. Children learn from those around them (I've seen many people say he's trash since he was a kid when he said that "i wonder what miserable face he has", but like he's a kid, he doesn't know what he's saying AHSJFJWJQ8QR he was either taught that or he just learned it from others. Funnily enough, he does say toji has a pretty face now LMAO). Maybe it stems from something else, maybe it didn't.

I'm not saying him trying to kill Megumi is forgotten (Though, the Jujutsu Society is a place where teens get executed for the simple fact that they are too strong, so im not surprised. Just like Noritoshi said, age does not matter in Jujutsu Society). I see now why he was really pissed about Megumi being the head, since Naoya has been promised the position since he was young, only to loose of a 15 year old who is the son of the man he admires :')) However, still, none of it excuses the shit he did. He still has a shitty personality, but it's nice to know a bit of a background.

Anyway, that's all for now. My English is bad so that might be all over the place •`,`• That's just my take on it so I could be wrong or maybe seeing him wrong since we still don't know much abt him. I'm always scared to talk about naoya because the last time i did (on twt) i got a backlash of hate (ppl really do get hate just from admiring someone's characterization). Your blog is like a safe haven for naoya stans, so i thank you for that hehe.

Have a nice day suki!! kisses~

(also this is a PSPSPSPS to a naoya childhood friends au fic pls 👁👁)

bestie omg I am so sorry, I found this deep in my inbox and I am *shakes* and yes yes let’s talk about naoya, I would be more than glad to and I’m sorry I didn’t see this any sooner!! more rants and simping under the cut

I'm kinda sad at how people just calls Naoya a Toji fanboy (though true LMAO) and not realizing how Toji really influenced his persona. Like the admiration Naoya held for Toji is so deeply engraved in him that he, who was called a genius sorcerer as a child, looks up to a man who was called a failure. Toji is probably the only man in the clan that he respected, that's why toji's level of strength became his "picture" to follow. And I think a lot of who Naoya has become is because the Zen'ins literally groomed the decency out of him. Still, though groomed to be everything he is, he himself chose not to change anything about it.

omg for this…I’m actually like…like I love the detail that naoya admires toji? as we can see from the panel of little naoya, it’s like people have already planted in his head that no cursed energy = loser, yet he ended up admiring him and I am,,,my heart is just soft! exactly! just think of naoya born as a genius sorcerer yet his admiration for toji, who is painted as the clan’s failure, helped shape him into who he is! idk but I just really love the fact that naoya, who is like born with the pressure and role of being clan leader, somewhat strays from tradition and ends up finding strength into toji and even strives to follow him or “stand by him” someday. for me, it just shows that perhaps naoya isn’t really half as bad as he should be in an honest sense, meaning that he’s evil or morally corrupt because he was born that way or because he chose to be that way. I do agree that perhaps he is the way he is now because he’s groomed to be like that, but of course, I’m not going to disregard the fact that somewhere along the way, Naoya could’ve matured to choose himself to not embody the misogynistic tradition of the zen’in clan.

This could just be me, but my interpretation of it is that Naoya seems more like the perfect product or embodiment of how the clan shaped him to be, blinded him with false morals and the patriarchy presiding into them. Rather than Naoya being just “a misogynistic arrogant man” in my perspective and my opinion, I see him more into the bigger picture of his toxic upbringing to begin with. Like, no child is born evil unless there’s like a predetermined curse deciding their fate for them, so its partly the Zen’in clan’s fault he’s that way. But Gege showing that Naoya admiring someone the Zen’in clan disregarded, it shows that he is capable of being himself without the clause of his clan enforcing things to him once again, like the whole “he’s gonna be the future clan leader” thing, though that is still heavily embedded within him.

(wait but also?? little naoya looks cute like he would guide old ladies on the ped xing so what the fuck happened after that)

OMGGGG PLEASE THAT’S SO CUTE, HE LOOKED SO INNOCENT AND ADORABLE BUT EVEN AS A CHILD HE WAS ALREADY CALLING PEOPLE A LOSER LIKE EYE

I guess one major reason why he does not respect anyone else in the clan (besides his superiority complex) is because of the Zen'in's concept of what is marked as strong. Like, the way they see and treated him as if he's the best sorcerer in the making, yet failing to see Toji's powers and rejecting him fully. It's something similar to Mai when she said "Maki has talent that I don't. And the clan rejected that; that talent that I lacked",except Naoya is raised to be a confident (arrogant?) child, thus he takes it as a challenge instead and works to achieve it.

Anon, is it just me or like…was his superiority complex also enforced on him by the Zen’in clan as well? Again this could just be me going all psychologist mode on Naoya but the nature of superiority complex is quite interesting, you know! As a psych student, I perfectly understand that superiority complex either stems from several things like a) wanting to live up to one’s or others expectations, b) masking it with a deep stem of insecurity, or c) it’s a coping mechanism. See, I could go on and on about but then I’d have to link all my past studies lmao so let’s just put it on layman’s terms that my interpretation of Naoya’s superiority complex is once again, influenced by the clan. Imagine being a kid born into a clan where people remind you again and again that you’re the future leader, that you would be the one to guide them or protect them or discuss the clan’s future and status once you grow, and you’re quite groomed for it.

For such pressure to be put on a child’s shoulders, it kind of strips off his youth and instead of him enjoying his youth, I can imagine that it took a toll on little Naoya, and the reason he grew his superiority complex is his way to cope and reach the standards and expectations that is given to him. Of course, he’s a kid, he might start to wonder, “Can I even do all of that?” but seeing as the Zen’in clan highly measures strength and growth based on abilities, cursed energy, and overall just to conform into the image they’ve held for years, it’s quite obvious that Naoya can’t exactly voice out his worries over this, so instead, he masks it with a superiority complex that absolutely boosts him to a higher level, thus giving him the confidence he needed to carry out his tasks and the reassurance that, “Yes, I am worthy and I will be the clan leader.” As for your theory that he takes it as a challenge, I can see where you’re coming from! I think Naoya is the type of person who definitely likes to challenge himself, but one of the reasons I love his character so much is because he’s not completely a brainless “head on straight to war” type of person too.

He knows his limits and knows which side he should be in, as showed when Yuuta came and mans surrendered easily. Idk why but to me, Naoya, who is such an arrogant confident man who has high trust in abilities, but at the same time can admit when someone is stronger than him (like him admiring Toji and Gojo) just makes him more human and a little more beautifully flawed. Like, he’s not perfect and he’s most definitely an irritating character, but the way he was written is just *chef’s kiss*

So, when Maki reached the level of Toji, I think his reaction wasn't simply stemmed on his "fanboy" antics, but his desperation of being part of that level of strength. I think he's more irritated in the fact that Maki, someone who he does not see anywhere near as strong as he is (though he does say Maki is strong in chapter 138), reached a level of strength that he hasn't; that he is trying hard to achieve. It's also the same with having your favorite superhero getting defeated. And Naoya's in denial that there is someone else who could be the same as Toji.

Yes, ah I really do love this theory that he’s more irritated because in his mind, he’s like, “I’m a genius sorcerer! I was meant to be clan leader! This is my rightful spot to be a strong one, so how come Maki, who is a woman, with no zero cursed energy has reached the level of the person I looked up most to?” again, Naoya didn’t say that and those are just my opinions and brainrot so don’t come at me for it uwu, but yeah I do think that he’s very aggravated that he didn’t react that level first. Because I guess you could say, he’s probably alluding that Maki reaching Toji’s strength = them being equals, and ofc Naoya wanted to be the one standing beside them. It probably hit his superiority complex that he wasn’t the one in Maki’s spot especially when he tried so hard to achieve it, and considering the gifts he was given (same cursed technique as his dad and him having cursed energy) it threw him off.

Yeah, Naoya is most likely in denial and becomes aggressive over it, although I don’t really mean physically aggressive because Naoya is actually quite calm and ‘composed.’ If ever he did go on a rampage, he does it in such a suave, calculated manner with this silent confidence that he will win. It kind of makes you root for him because he even fools the audience (by audience I mean ME) that he’s going to OWN that fight but whoop, he got his ass kicked. Plus ten points for confidence and a bonus thousand points for being sexy though!!! Yeah, omg he’s probably in disbelief that a woman of all people could be like the person he admired most.

I like how he's an antagonist that was not build under the foundation of a sob backstory (though it was a v small sneak peak of his background and was mainly centered with his admiration for toji, plus I think people forget that Naoya is an antagonist), how he acknowledges that he has not reached that level of strength. Of course, I'm angsty about his misogynistic ideals. I get that he's from a very traditionalist clan so... yeah. I mean, no child is born evil. Children learn from those around them (I've seen many people say he's trash since he was a kid when he said that "i wonder what miserable face he has", but like he's a kid, he doesn't know what he's saying AHSJFJWJQ8QR he was either taught that or he just learned it from others. Funnily enough, he does say toji has a pretty face now LMAO). Maybe it stems from something else, maybe it didn't.

OMG YESSSS ANON YES YES YES *slams down simping button angrily* That’s what I like about him too! Even though Naoya is cocky and wayyyy too arrogant for his own good, I also like that he acknowledges he’s not quite in a level he wants to be in yet. And hah, his backstory, it wasn’t totally sob because it’s obvious he was much too doted on, but I still hate how they made him like that. True, if he’s still carrying the same misogynistic ideals as he is now in an age where he has the mental capacity to improve and be different, then the belief has become more of a choice than something engraved into him, which I am really disappointed and not really into because of course, he’d be much better if he wasn’t like that in the first place. LOLOLOLOL yes yes he’s a kid, it sure as hell doesn’t excuse the way he is now but like just think !!

if a kid was spouting out such mean words and CLEARLY no one is correcting him, who really is the problem here? A child has a harder time deciphering what is right and wrong by himself without proper guidance. And he didn’t have proper guidance, they really just let him be like that and it’s because the clan!! sucks !! ass !! YEAH he probably called toji with a miserable face because he hasn’t seen him before but after seeing the iconic dilf, Naoya gone be like, “anyways, I lied, moving on—”

I'm not saying him trying to kill Megumi is forgotten (Though, the Jujutsu Society isa place where teens get executed for the simple fact that they are too strong, so im not surprised. Just like Noritoshi said, age does not matter in Jujutsu Society). I see now why he was really pissed about Megumi being the head, since Naoya has been promised the position since he was young, only to loose of a 15 year old who is the son of the man he admires :')) However, still, none of it excuses the shit he did. He still has a shitty personality, but it's nice to know a bit of a background.

yeah no of course, no worries! even as a hardcore naoya stan, I can admit this dude is TERRIBLE for so many reasons! yeah I mean that could be pretty irritating because he was born for it, raised to be clan leader, groomed and expected he’d have that role, but nah someone else took his throne. yeah I’m with you on that, naoya has a shitty personality and I would totally smack him if he was real because he makes my eyes roll to the back of my head, but knowing his background and theorizing (read: me going all psychologist mode because he’s the only character I ever cared about to apply my studies into) his character is quite fun. I wish we had more scenes with Naoya though, I really hoped he’d play a bigger role but he just…died, I guess, though I’m starting to believe that maybe he really isn’t dead! Gege did him dirty omg I’ll cry again if it’s really GENUINELY confirmed my baby is gone.

Anyway, that's all for now. My English is bad so that might be all over the place •`,`• That's just my take on it so I could be wrong or maybe seeing him wrong since we still don't know much abt him. I'm always scared to talk about naoya because the last time i did (on twt) i got a backlash of hate (ppl really do get hate just from admiring someone's characterization). Your blog is like a safe haven for naoya stans, so i thank you for that hehe.

ah no worries about your English, I didn’t really notice anything wrong with it tbh! And I understand, these are all just our opinions/theories/perspectives, we could be wrong or not, we don’t really know because we’re not Gege (⋟﹏⋞) NOOOO PEOPLE HATED YOU ON THAT? ISTG I’VE NEVER SEEN A FANDOM CANCEL SOMEONE AS MUCH AS JJK FANDOM CANCELS NAOYA AND NAOYA STANS LIKE – he’s just a fictional character omg, cancelling naoya is understandable because I would too but attacking his fans? or generally anyone who talks about him in a neutral or not in a way that goes, “yeah I would punch this mfer” is just?? doesn’t make sense to me bestie, people really choose to do that with their time yikes.

AND AWWW THANK YOU YES I PROTECT ALL MY FELLOW NAOYA STANS HERE, I respect who people simp for because if it’s what you enjoy and as long as you’re not hurting anybody, then it really doesn’t matter and it’s not a big deal! and you’re always welcome here uwu. have an even nicer day bestie and I’m sorry I didn’t see this sooner AAAA I really loved talking about this tho HEHEHEH I’m not actually too much of a JJK theorist since I’m not smart enough to pay attention or infer from all the details but NAOYA HMMMMM also childhood friends fic? hmu let’s hear it!! also ahh hmm idk but i get really happy whenever people talk to me freely about naoya bcos even tho i have been a naoya simp for like three months, it was not until recently that people came to me about him and i have just been simping alone (bcos people MADDDD) spsppsps okay rant over thank you anon i love you kith kith <3