#and the angst is merely beginning
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tanjir0se · 1 year ago
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Kiss the Devil, Chapter 5
In a forward-flying leap, Kyojuro’s hand found Akaza’s throat, gripped it tightly, and tackled the other demon to the ground. He held him against the earth by the throat and a knee pressed into his chest. His face inches from Akaza’s, Kyojuro bared his teeth.  Akaza blinked up at him, then grinned with bemused delight. “What, they’re letting you keep pets now?” He asked in Giyuu and Tanjiro’s general direction.  “Not very well trained, is it?” He was cut off as Kyojuro lifted him by the throat and slammed him back down into the earth with such force that it cracked the ground beneath them.  “What did you do to me?” His voice was such a ferocious snarl that Tanjiro and Giyuu could hardly make out the words at all. Akaza’s grin faded. He looked unflinchingly up at the demon holding him down, stared into those uncanny bright eyes, like twin suns. Where have I seen those eyes before?  “What did you do to me, you bastard?!” The familiar demon roared again, slamming him back into the earth a second time. His cascade of fiery hair fell over the both of them. Akaza’s eyes went wide.  “Kyojuro…?”
Chapter 5 of Kiss the Devil is up on AO3! I hope you enjoy, and as always Happy Rengiyuu Wednesday!
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poppy-s-rampage · 3 months ago
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Chapter 2: Welcome to Gotham!
Warnings: A little bit of blood, breakdown and emotional distress.
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Chapter 1! | Masterpost | Chapter 3!
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After finally closing up the last wound, Clockwork took a moment to look over his work. All of the young Halfa’s wounds have been sealed and treated with diluted ectoplasm. It was only enough to make the injuries look a week old at best but it will have to do.
The Ancient lifted his staff and in one swift movement ripped a hole in the fabric of reality. CW then carefully cradled Danny in his arms. Then both the Ancient and the Halfa stepped into the portal.
On the other side, they were met with an emaciated woman clad in a red and black Victorian dress accompanied by a small rose decorated matching hat. In her hand a small umbrella made of lace and what seemed to be black clouds. 
Her delicate snow white skin furrowed by ink black veins. Her blood red lips striking against the pallor of her face were pursed in worry. Her eyes, even while covered by her laced black veil, didn’t hide her apprehension.
The woman’s dress’s neckline was fashioned in the silhouette of a bat. Pearls scattered like falling stars across the red and black folds of the garment. Her waist encased in a tight bodice was embellished by small golden coins and feathers. The red fishtail spilling on the ground lazily trailing after its mistress.
The woman bowed her head, greeting the Ancient and his charge.
“Lord Clockwork.” Her raspy yet somehow suave voice resonated into the night.
“Lady Gotham.” He responded while slightly dipping his head down.
The city spirit glanced at the boy in the other’s arm. His bandaged form and torn clothes were not what first captured her attention. What truly horrified her was the state of the young Halfa’s core. Wrapped and cracked, barely a breath away from breaking and ceasing to exist.
Her own aching at the view, screaming at her to take the boy, wrap him in a bundle of blankets and nurse/guard him until at full health.
Being ended was reserved to the lowest of the low. It was a last resort that should only be used should the offender be irredeemable and too dangerous to be contained. To think that this almost happened and still could to her own king and one so young.
It was nauseating.
Lady Gotham forced herself to look away, turning her attention back to Clockwork.
“I assume he is the charge you want to bring into my care.”
“He is.” Clockwork responded.
The woman nodded, the smoke and black clouds in her umbrella spreading around her.
“Then if you will follow me.”
Lady Gotham faded and became one with the smog. The black mass zooming towards Midtown Gotham, the ancient of time on its heels.
They soon arrived in front of a small but clean apartment building. The two ghosts phased through the wall of the top floor only to be greeted by the view of a spacious yet cozy loft.
The unit was furnished with all the necessary furniture, non-ecto-contaminated food already stocked in the fridge. The space was designed in order to facilitate Daniel’s recovery. The boy would already be going through hell with his recovery and grief; it was best not to add insult to injury.
The city spirit having taken back physical form, leads Clockwork towards the bed on the second floor of the loft.
Once inside, the Ancient carefully sets Danny down on the bed and slowly covers him with a soft blanket. He then produced a pen and a neon green notepad from who knows where and started writing.
Lady Gotham approached the ghost.
“Lord ClockWork, pardon my intrusion, but wouldn’t it be best for you to explain the situation to the young king face to face.”
Clockwork paused.
“Young Daniel is too unstable to be dealing with the emotional distress my presence would bring. He has been hurt enough as it is.”
“Those excuses are nothing but the words of a coward.”
“Pardon me?”
“You are not. Are you truly running away in order to protect the boy or are you doing so to save yourself?”
“…”
“Tell me, Lord Clockwork. When the young king awakens, would he prefer to be met with an insincere apology letter from a coward or the genuine words of a man admitting to his mistakes?”
Clockwork couldn’t even utter a word.He didn’t have any excuse to defend himself. The city spirit was right.
“Your words are as sharp as ever, old friend.”
“I speak nothing but the truth, Master of Time. However, it seems to me that you are already set on your decision.”
“I-”
“I hope in your interest that you made the right choice.” The Lady snapped.
The woman turned away but not without leaving a few departing words.
“Or that at least you are prepared to face the consequences.”
Lady Gotham disappeared in a whirlwind of smog.
Clock work turned back to Daniel watching as his face scrunched up when the old ghost brushed a strand of hair away from his face.
His old core flared with parental love.
He looked so peaceful, as if nothing ever went wrong. However, In just a few hours, he would wake up and reality would come crashing down.
His bright and joyous protegee. The one he couldn’t help but adore every version of. The one he subconsciously adopted as his own child.
Clockwork couldn’t. He just couldn’t bring himself to face the hatred and pain his pupil would inevitably direct at him.
Gotham was right.
The Master of Time set down the notepad on the night table
He was a coward.
—-------
*A few hours later*
As the first few rays of sunshine broke through Gotham’s thick smog, a young black and white haired boy slowly woke up from his slumber.
It was comfortable, the soft fluffy blanket brushing against his achy skin. The warmth that comes with being cocooned in the safety of your own bed. Danny didn’t want to open his eyes. But he needed to wake up, in just a few moments Jazz would come knocking at his door to drag him to school.
The soft familiar knock never came, but the memories sure did.
Danny snapped his eyes open. Tears threatening to fall.
Clockwork -LiaR- ,the reveal, the capture -BeTraYaL-, the experiments -PaIN-, Jazz, Sam, Tucker,-PAINPAINPAIN mY FauLT- the wails, blood, explosion, death -MurDEreR!-, pain, Core breaking, burning, melting- PAIN PAIN PAIN! I ShOuLD be DeAD!-.
The Halfa now fully awake kicked the blanket enveloping him away and tried to get out of the bed.
His legs still injured and unable to support his weight gave out and he collapsed on the wooden floor in a heap.
The sharp pain of jolting his injuries and face planting further cemented to Danny that he wasn’t dreaming and that the nightmare was fully real.
“...no…NONONONONONO! Please, no! Please! I BEG YOU! PLEASE! JAZZ, TUCK, SAM PLEASE! DONT BE REAL! PLEASE!” Danny tried to say, but the only thing that came out were erratic breaths that could vaguely be associated with words. His damaged throat made it impossible to even breathe without it flaring in pain.
Choked and pained sobs filled the once silent room.
The young Halfa still collapsed on the floor cried , slowly curling up on himself hugging his knees.
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Chapter 1! | Masterpost | Chapter 3!
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See you next time!
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mad-hunts · 4 months ago
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have i ever talked about how barton is genuinely jealous of people who seem happy because he feels so hollow a majority of the time that even when he's 'happy,' he's not really happy? because i just 😭 yeah...
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lalunanymph · 8 months ago
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ΉΣЯ & ƬΉΣ ƧΣΛ
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༊ you ask rafayel how lemurians reproduce, and he can't wait to show you
✯ warnings; rafayel x fem!reader, established relationship, MONSTERFUCKING, switch!rafayel, switch!reader, rafayel's lemurian form, sex underwater, reader is coded to be feminine (wears a dress and lingerie), mentions of alien genitalia, rafayel calls reader 'master' once, petnames (my little conch shell, my queen, baby, my love, miss bodyguard), size kink (reader is obvs smaller than him, he's a goddamn mErmAID), OVIPOSITION, dirty talk, language, breeding, girl on top position, missionary, reader sucks his merman cock (lmao), dubious breathing underwater methods, mentions of food, mentions of alcohol, suggestive content, slight spoilers for rafayel's myth if you squint, mild angst
✯ istg i am a zayne girlie but something about rafayel just makes me go feral
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"𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐃𝐎 𝐌𝐄𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐈𝐃𝐒 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐈𝐄𝐒?"
The question stunned Rafayel from taking a bite of his souffle pancakes, his fork pausing from its journey into his now lax mouth. Sunlight continues streaming in past the French windows; the patrons of this cafe going about their day, oblivious to the malfunctioning celebrity artist amongst them.
A glob of whip cream freefalls off the metal tines and onto his plate. Those magnetic pink-blue eyes flash with a multitude of colors—like a sea-worn rock under the brilliant sun. 
However, as fast as your question hit him, he overcame it; no one could say that Mr. Rafayel, the art world's maverick and media-trained connoisseur, was slow in recovering his wits.
His signature teasing smile in place, Rafayel placed his fork back down onto the table.
Across from you, two friends were speaking in low tones and judging from their expression, unpacking their love lives with the sombreness of a priest reciting a divorce rite.
Rafayel blinked, tilting his head to the side. 
"Why would you ask, Miss Bodyguard?" 
He casually slung an arm over the back of his chair, a million dollar smile gleaming and ready. "Or, has something struck your most vivid imagination?" 
Laying it on thick, he couldn't even begin to disguise the gleam of his teeth—shining like the incisors of a great white after smelling fresh blood in the ocean. 
"I never thought you would be so sugges—ouch!"
Rafayel winced, and doubled over, rubbing his shin under the table. "What was that for?" 
You huffed, and fixed him a glare. "Don't embarrass me." 
"I was just joking."
"Wasn't funny." 
"Yeesh. You're really wound up about this, huh?" 
That infuriating smirk was plastered back onto his face; his boyish features making something in your chest squeeze. 
"Shut up and answer the question." 
He pretended to ponder on it for a moment. More color illuminates his stunning amethyst irises. Shining like jewels, only he knew the value of his true thoughts. 
Before you could retract your question and salvage this bright afternoon, Rafayel surprises you with his next words.
"Why don't I show you, my little conch shell?" 
You freeze. Scanning the area, you wondered if this was the right conversation to be having in such a brightly lit area. Granted, you and Rafayel were past the carnal stage —after being together for close to a year, your bodies were well-worn maps that lips and fingers could retrace and discover any time.
Fighting back a laugh, you shake your head.
"Is this another one of your racy propositions again?"
Rafayel merely smirked. "If that is how you wish to see it." 
Seriously now, you counter, "Will I have paint in my hair again?" 
Memories flash in your mind; of a large canvas, soft candlelight, and streaks of paint on the most random parts of your body found weeks after the deed was done. 
Your lover sits back, using one slender finger to cross over his heart. "I promise your hair won't go through such torment anymore." Despite your best efforts, your eyes trail to his broad chest, and the enticing V of his defined pecs.
As if sensing your eyes on him, Rafayel's mirth grows. "Looks like you can't resist much longer, I'll make you a deal—" 
He leaned in close—much too close—and you could smell the vanilla on his breath; the sunlight glinting off those purple irises softening with a look of warmth only he held for you.
"—come with me tonight to Whitesand Bay, and I promise you won't regret it." 
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Muggy and balmy in the evening, Whitesand Bay wasn't exactly the ideal meet up spot for Rafayel to finally fulfill his promise and show you how mermaids reproduce. 
But, you showed up anyway.
Dressed in a light, silk dress to combat the heavy heat of the summer night, you cautiously made your way down to the docks, keeping your eyes and ears peeled for Rafayel. 
"You're here." He appeared a moment later, dashing as usual in his white button-down and pristine slacks. Dazzling under the half-light, you allowed him to take your hand and lead you right to a boat.
"We're not going for a to take a deep dive like last time, right?" Hearing the skepticism in your voice, he laughs.
"Of course, not. I paid Thomas a huge bonus last month and told him to buy a speedboat. For us to borrow, if you're curious." 
"Poor Thomas," you mused, letting him hold you close to his side as he helped you atop the board. "His boss is a tyrant... asking him to use his bonus for such lavish nonsense."
"Is it really a lavish nonsense if I get to have you here?" 
Rafayel's sincerity struck you mute. He breezed past your shocked figure, unaware of the effect he has on you. "Well? Are you going to continue mocking my methods of employment or are we going to do this?" 
Even though his chest was puffed and voice full of bravado, you could tell your sweet artist boyfriend was struggling with his nerves. The tips of his ears were bright red, a faint shadow of a pout on his lips. 
"Raffie," you whisper, taking his hand. He glanced at you, wide-eyed like a fish caught on the bait. "What're you so scared of? It's just you and me."
He lets you rub your thumb across his knuckles, tightening your hold on his fingers.
"I just..." he trails off. "... just don't want you to think I'm a freak. That's all."
Rafayel refused to look at you when he was this vulnerable, and you couldn't help the short giggle bursting past your defenses. He glared, and you quickly reached for his face, touching his cheek.
"Never," you emphasize. "I will never think you're weird. Ever. Besides, if you're a freak then I'm the weirdo in love with you."
Your dopey grin sets something aflutter in his chest, like ripples of ocean waves splashing across a strange shore. Rafayel smirks and takes your hand off his face, choosing to twine his fingers with yours. 
"Shall we make a move, then, my little conch shell?" 
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"Rafayel..."
The sight before you stuns you with its splendor. Your beloved boyfriend had gone all out—picnic blankets, lighted candles, flutes of champagne, and spreads of seafood as far as the eye could see... arranged all across the flatbed of this hidden alcove where the sea kisses the land. 
In the distance, the gentle swishes of waves lapping at the shore greeted your ears, its waves illuminated faintly as if lit from within.
"Bioluminescent algae," Rafayel murmurs right behind you. His arms came to wrap around your waist, the heat of his breath fanning right across your exposed neck. "They only appear in the summer when the water is warm." You fight back a shiver, trying not to show how affected you were by his presence. 
"Oh." Dumbly, you weren't sure how to put your thoughts together, much less a coherent sentence. 
Sensing your speechlessness, Rafayel exhaled a laugh. "Come on. We should eat before the food gets cold."
There's a dip in his tone, something tinged with a darker emotion you barely had time to unravel before he was tugging you onto the picnic mat. The food was divine, his personal chefs going all out to satisfy both of your palettes. Conversation flowed easily like the champagne slipping down your throat, coaxing you to release the tightness in your chest in favor of bubbly giggles and flirty smiles.
Rafayel's cheeks were steadily growing pinker, and you were sure he would double over and pass out—forgetting about your brazen question—when you felt his hand on your thigh.
"Would you like to take a swim with me?" 
Memories of seaweed brushing your bare legs, Rafayel’s arms steadily around your waist as he led you past the shoreline fills your mind. Anything cool sounded like a blessing from this heat. 
Plus, he was a pretty good swimmer, as evident from what he truly was. Rafayel would never put you in harm’s way. 
Safe. That was the word. You always feel safe with him. 
“Yes.”
He takes your hand, gives it a squeeze and helps you stand.
Rafayel started to undress first. The hem of his expensive silk shirt reveals the fitted band of his equally expensive slacks—made by the best tailors in all of Linkon. Then, pale skin. It stretches, tightens over defined obliques, abs and then his impressively broad chest. 
Scattered across the sinew and muscle roping his torso were smatterings of moles and beauty marks. 
Someone once told you that these marks were spots past lovers used to love kissing. You idly trace your gaze over the one on his left pec, right over his heart. 
If Rafayel and you had been together in the past, you were sure that the spot over his heart would be your favorite spot to plant your lips on him. 
As furtively as you could, you tried not to gape at him, but completely failed.
Rafayel was a masterpiece made by the gods themselves, and you were the poor fool gaping at his altar; transfixed on the sharp V which led to a light dusting of his happy trail. 
His cock strains behind his slacks, bulging noticeably. You want to reach out and skim your fingers, eager to feel it twitch under your touch. 
"Well?" His gentle amusement tore your thoughts from their sinful vices. "Are you gonna just stare at me or are we going for a swim? Your pick, Miss Bodyguard." 
Showing that you were far braver than you felt, you stood up, shaky hands reaching for the straps of your dress. "Don't look at me." 
A surge of heat flooded your cheeks, your eyes resolutely turned to the side. Obediently, Rafayel followed your orders, though you could hear the cogs turning in his head. It's not like I haven't seen her naked before.  
But, this wasn’t the usual plotting, teasing and flirting you both would indulge in.
Something about the air tonight felt heavier. 
Intimate.
You swore Rafayel could pick up your heartbeat from where he stood. The heat on your cheeks spread down your chest, tingling on your fingertips.
“Okay. I’m ready.”
In nothing but in your lingerie, you shift from foot to foot, feeling too vulnerable and open.
The sky above yawns wide, inky black jaws lovingly unfurling like a spread of velvet sheets. His hand is warm in yours, and you squeeze it, trying to hide how you were trembling. 
“Hey.” Rafayel sweeps you into his arms. Try as you might to fight off the nerves, they bubble up in a short squeak when your face meets his chest. “Relax, baby. You’re shaking like a bubble in the sun… don’t pop just yet.”
You find comfort in his scent—oceanic and musky—breathing him in. 
Do you trust me? Rafayel once asked when you both were drunk on a night out. 
Of course, I do. You flick his nose. Why wouldn’t I trust you? 
Even if I’m different? He fixes you with a look, lucid for someone who had just downed an entire champagne bottle. And I can’t be normal for you? 
Especially because you aren’t normal in the sense of its word… I trust you even more because you trusted me, first. 
Waves lap at your toes, and you shiver at how cool the water is. 
“Easy,” Rafayel coaxes you. He takes the lead, sinking into the soft sand first, never releasing his hold on you. 
You do as he says, a sailor to his siren call, except you knew in your heart you would willingly follow him till the ends of the world.
Once the water was up to your waist, Rafayel exhaled. “Stay here. I’ll be back.” 
You don't have time to protest when he dives into the waves, barely kicking up a spray. Eyeing the softly luminated sea surface, you dip your fingers into the warm water, watching a blue orb float in between your loose fists. 
“Hey.”
Startling, you look up to find him grinning, lilac hair darkened with salt water; holding a bundle of what you thought was tangled hair in his grasp.
“I know you hate the taste of seaweed, but this’ll help when we… get into things.” 
He ends in an awkward note, and you wondered what happened to the once cocky, and sure Rafayel you knew. 
Unfurling his clenched fist, he hands you one single strand. “Eat this. It’ll help you breathe underwater temporarily.” 
“What is it?” you sniff at the strange vegetation. 
“Hydroweed. It gives humans the ability to breathe underwater for up to an hour.”
Putting your faith in his words, you nod. Opening your mouth, you bite into the Hydroweed. 
The briny taste was overwhelming, its tough fibers making it difficult for you to chew. But, you manage to swallow it down. 
Instantly, you felt your throat closing, the air choked out of your lungs. “Rafayel—!” 
Strong hands grab your waist, dragging you under the foamy waves. 
You gasp, about to scream at him to let you go, when you took in your first deep breath underwater.
The world suddenly came to life. Bright blue orbs floated right in front of your face, and you reached for them, in awe at how vivid they glowed now you could see them up close. 
Down in the depths, the waves became hushed murmurs in the background, filling your ears with a ringing silence. 
“Are you okay?” Rafayel’s voice shot through the floating calm like a shout, and you cringed back in shock. 
“Sorry,” he laughs, and pulls you to his side. “It’s way quieter down here than up above because sound travels differently. Strange, huh?” 
You nod, not entirely sure if you could use your voice. As if he read your thoughts, Rafayel chuckles.
“Go ahead and speak, my little conch shell. I can hear you just fine.” 
You take a deep breath. “O-okay.” Growing confident and more comfortable, you relax in his embrace. “It feels… strange. Like you said. But, at the same time, I don’t entirely hate it.”
“Mhm,” he rubs your back, smiling reassuringly and wide. “If there are other Lemurians within a few miles, they can most likely hear you scream.”
His double meaning didn’t register until you felt his palms tracing your hips, teasing down your body to give your ass a fond squeeze.
“Hey—!” 
You swat his hands away, mute with embarrassment. “I-is that why you all live so deep in the sea? For privacy?” 
Rafayel hums. It’s a little off putting how clear his voice sounds, like you were listening to him through a pair of high-grade earphones. 
“Usually, Lemurians mate deep in the trenches where the light can’t find us. It helps to keep things more private and intimate. If not, we travel to other seas uninhabited by our species. I used to know a guy who dragged his wife to the middle of the Atlantic when they were trying for a family.”
Rafayel’s focus ebbs into the distance, a tinge of sadness in his tone that appears whenever he speaks of his long lost people and home. 
You take his hands in yours and squeeze, trying to draw him back from the precipice of his ruined memories.
“We could try…” you trail off, unsure if this was the right thing to say. “...to repopulate it?” 
Like your words were a trigger, you found yourself planted right on the ocean floor, soft sand cushioning your body.
You squeak, quickly darting your eyes to his, arms instinctively wrapping around his shoulders.
Rafayel’s usual glimmering pink-blue eyes were shadowed by a darker emotion; reminding you of glinting shark teeth or a blade of moonlight slicing through choppy water. 
“Don’t say that, baby.” Was it you, or did his voice drop an octave? 
Your Lemurian lover’s low reprimand made a shudder run down your spine, his half-mast eyes causing your stomach to flip.
“You don’t know how those words make me feel… my kind used to reproduce by the dozens—I can’t wait to see you bulging with my babies.” 
Wait… babies? 
With a capital ‘S’?
His mouth lands on yours, hungry and seeking. You kiss him back with as much ardor, lost in the sensations that you almost forgot what he had said earlier.
“Raf… Rafayel—” you gasp when he starts to dig his teeth into your neck, nipping down your jaw and collarbone.
Deft hands unclip your bra, the motion fluid like he has done this a million times before. From the corner of your eye, you see every article of clothing he took off you floating right to the surface; moonlight bouncing off the fragmented surface, playing across the broad expanse of his back. 
Your head swims with fuzzy thoughts long discarded when he pushes the plush fat of your tits together, licking and nipping around your areolas, ignoring how your nipples were already circling with need. 
“Raffie…” You fist his hair, trying to push his mouth to where you need him the most. “Don’t tease me.”
He laughs at your soft whine. “I need to make sure you’re prepared, my love.”
My love. Rafayel only called you that term whenever he was in the thick of his passion; it seems like you were about to witness the cumulation of your innocent question coming true.
Strong hands held you firmly while he eased down your body, planting fleeting kisses on every inch of your skin his lips could touch. 
Down in the deep, gasps and screams weren’t sounds, but vibrations; the sounds escaping your mouth resounding around your entwined bodies.
“Fuck,” Rafayel cussed once he reached the apex of your thighs. “I can’t wait to finally taste you underwater.” 
Barely giving you time to brace yourself, the broad stroke of his tongue melted through your folds. 
Never would you have imagined you would be eaten out right on the ocean’s bed—going deeper and deeper into the neverending blue. 
Rafayel’s lips were wrapped around your nub, sucking and caressing it with his tongue exactly how you liked it. Your smaller fingers sank into his hair, the other entwining with his own above your heart; back arched to give him everything you have.
“S’good,” he murmurs, verging on the edge of slurring. “I love you.”
His name tumbles from your mouth like a primal echo, calling him right to the edge of a bottomless trench.
Rafayel wasn’t afraid; he would traverse the deep beyond for as many chances to be with you as he could.
“Put your legs around my waist,” he whispers in between sloppy kisses back up your body. 
If someone were to tell you that your sweet boyfriend was literally making love to you on the bottom of the ocean, you would tell them a Wanderer had infected their mind.
Out of the corner of your eye, you see his body emanating a faint glow. A distant memory claws past the thin membrane of your barely held together thoughts; moonlight bouncing off pink-blue scales, his unbearable body heat and a pearly sheen misting his eyes.
“Rafayel—” 
The change was imperceptible. At first, you couldn’t feel anything but the sinful sinking of his cock stretching out your cunt. 
Then, it hit you like a freight train.
His waist felt like it was expanding, pushing your thighs further apart. But, when you glanced down the line of your bodies, the length of his legs was replaced by something longer. Bigger. It distinctly had two fins attached to the end, bent at an angle to accommodate the position he was fucking you in.
“R-Rafayel—!” 
“Fuck,” he strains, lining his forehead with yours. “I-I’m scared of hurting you.” 
“N-no,” you force your thick tongue to relinquish the words. “You'll never.”
His skin grew harder under your touch, inches of pale expanses replaced by shiny scales. Minus his face, his limbs, back, chest and torso were completely covered by the armor-like toughness of multiple hardened plates. Where the scales couldn’t touch, they were bonded together by thin layers of lamella, giving his entire body an otherworldly sheen. 
Mesmerized, you titled his face towards you, marveling at the scattering of scales adorning his throat and jaw. 
“Wow,” you murmur, touching them. They weren’t as hard or sharp as you imagined; his scales had a delightful give you couldn't stop pressing down on. 
In response, Rafayel grunts. “Baby… It’s happening.”
You were about to part your mouth and ask him what was, when your eyes shot wide open. 
The place where you both were connected suddenly grew tighter, as if something was pushing against your insides. Your muscles instinctively tried to expel the foreign intrusion, tensing and tightening—it was a shot of fear unlike any other you had ever tasted. 
Panicking, you cried out, “Rafayel, stop!”
Immediately, he ceased rutting into you, breathing heavily. Anguished, pastel eyes peel clapped onto yours, a pearly sheen filming over them.
“Shit… shit, I’m so sorry…”
“What’s happening?” you blurt out, a tremble of fear in your question. “Are you… are you putting e-eggs in me?” 
“Eggs?” he sounds bewildered, and that causes you to be perplexed in turn. Breathing hard, Rafayel’s forehead thumps onto your sternum. He doesn’t refute you or confirm your suspicions. Instead, he takes in a deep, ragged breath, like he was trying to tame down a cresting emotion. “Did you actually think, for a single second, that I was going to leave eggs in you?” 
Before you can even speak, his broad shoulders start to shake. Rafayel’s quiet laughter roused your confusion and indignation; your brows furrowing together because he wouldn’t stop laughing.
“Shut up,” it was your turn to be the whiner in this relationship. “You’re mean. It’s a valid question!” 
“Oh, baby,” he wheezes. One second, he was laughing, and the next, he lapsed into a quiet seriousness, the sudden mood change giving you whiplash. “I would never hurt you like that, my love. Trust me.”
Gently grasping your hand with his, he slips it down both your bodies, right to where you two were connected. “What I meant to show you, my little conch shell, is this.” 
He brings your hand between your own legs. You thought he was going to make you touch yourself, but when you feel something hard and distinctively not flesh-like bump your hand, you flinch back.
“Ssh, don’t be afraid,” he murmurs. “Go on and take a look, my love.”
Again with my love. 
Rafayel was either struck with nerves, or he was completely enamored with you at this moment. 
You licked your lips, tasting salt water on them and cautiously stretched your fingers to feel the strange object up. It was long and girthy, like a penis, except it wasn’t.
Steeling yourself, you risk a peek.
Gone was the smooth, veiny skin of Rafayel’s cock. His human one. 
In its place, was a thick length, riddled with ridges and bumps like an octopus’ tentacle. His very human appendage was always a stunner—slender (like his physique), veiny, with a hooked tip—but the sight before you (that strange and downright alien sight) blew your expectations out of the water. 
Your gasp reverberated around the pressing silence. Rafayel was quiet, waiting for you to speak. In turn, you couldn’t keep your eyes off his new genitalia. 
“Is that…” you struggle to piece together a coherent question. “Is that all… going inside of me?” 
Rafayel grunts. “Unless you don’t want me to, sweetheart.”
You take a moment to gather your thoughts, staring past the crest of his shoulder towards the shimmering, seemingly impenetrable ceiling of a world beyond the bubble you both created.
“I do,” you finally whisper, your confession rippling around the both of you, suspending your forms in an endless wave of mutual ecstasy. “I want this. I want you.”
Rafayel doesn’t bother to waste his time replying. You brace yourself, heels digging into his hips, clinging onto him with all of your strength. 
The first breach of his otherworldly cock inside of you felt like a touch of electricity up your spine. You cried out, nails digging into his scaly shoulders.
“Relax,” he paces you through the sensations. “I need you to relax for me, my love. I can’t get in if you’re this tight.” 
You gulp in a few deep breaths with your eyes screwed shut, and eventually, your heartbeat slows down. Sluggishly cracking your lids open, you catch the gleam in his pink-blue irises; locks of his iridescent hair floating around his serene expression.
The strange sensation was back, easing past your ring of muscle. You choke on a moan, trying to swallow your fear. 
“Ssh,” Rafayel murmurs. To distract you, he leaves feathery kisses on your cheeks, jaw and then, your lips. 
If the bottom of the ocean wasn’t enough to drown you, his kiss would. 
Rafayel… you whisper into the water. 
His name was a prayer dedicated to the Sea Gods on your tongue, your body sprawled out beyond your comprehension. Every line of you was taut with tension, the achingly slow stretch of his appendage plunging deeper and deeper into your heat had your head spinning like a whirlpool was threatening to suck you in. 
“Almost,” his harsh whisper clashes with your breath. “So good for me; you’re doing so good for me, my love.”
“Rafayel,” you mewled, the sea taking your tears. Hiccuping his name, you shudder, hiding your face in the crook of his neck. 
Your fist clamped down on soft sand, your back arched, and finally—finally—you felt his hips clipping yours.
“Fuck.”
The both of you groan in unison. 
His kisses were still warm, flush on your parted lips. Rafayel shunted his hips forward, then back. Repeating the same motion. 
Again. Again. And again.
The sensation was unlike any other you had felt in this world. No cock could possibly compare to the ridges wrapped around his length, the blunt, elongated tip almost touching the deepest part of your body.
“Rafayel,” you cried in a thick voice, like your mouth was filled with cotton. “Oh, God…”
Your tits flushed to his chest, your fingers in his hair and his tongue twining with yours shook your inner world like a deep sea earthquake.
This wasn’t like your usual lovemaking sessions; everything was amplified, more sensitive and tangible.
God, was it all so tangible.
You could physically feel every scaly ridge under your fingertips. His modified cock dragging those ecstasy-inducing bumps across your walls. Even his taste was different underwater; like a briny, primal flavor which coated your tongue. 
“Y/N,” his moan more angelic than what you could handle. “I love you. I love you so, so much—” 
Rafayel choked, and you didn’t need to ask to know he was about to cum. 
The ecstasy of it all wrapped its tendrils around both your embracing bodies; a human and Lemurian entangled in a dance as old as time. 
“I love you,” you cry out, toes curling and your nails raking down his back. Rafayel grunts, and in the dim half-light of the ocean engulfing you, you swore you saw his frantic eyes shine like precious pearls.
The world was closing in, darkness seeping into the corners of your vision. 
You pushed on his shoulder, trying to get his attention; acutely aware that the ache in your lungs wasn’t because of his kisses, but of something else.
Something out of your control.
The call of the surface burned through your lungs, and you opened your mouth, about to scream for him to let you go, when it all slammed into you like a tidal wave.
Darkness exploded, splattering across your mind, and you heard his cry of your name, the sound now echoey and muggy.
There was movement. A sharp tug. What sounded like wind whistling through your ears. 
Through your snatches of consciousness, you were aware of the pushback both your bodies weathered through the wall of water; how the ocean was trying to hold you back.
As soon as the sensation appeared, it was shattered by a golden burst of fresh oxygen.
Gulping in mouthfuls of air, you yelled out in fright, blindly grappling across the writhing dark mess of endless ocean surrounding you. 
Rafayel! Rafayel!
You felt strong arms wrap around you, holding you in his embrace like how a father would cradle his child.
Close your eyes, you thought you heard him murmur in your ear. And don’t open them until I tell you it’s safe to.
Arms clamped around his shoulders and legs wrapped around his waist, your intrinsic fear of the ocean made you trust his word. 
Gently now, you were bobbing across the water, the cool currents rushing across your bare skin. It felt like gelatinous cold drafts constantly hitting every body part. Staying true to his promise, you kept your eyes shut until you felt rough sand on your back; the waves receding from your body to lap at your toes.
Gasping, you peel your eyes open, lid by lid.
The alcove where he took you tonight was back in front of you. 
Rolling onto your front, you tried to stand, but only succeeded in stumbling back onto the sand; losing your sense of balance from countless minutes spent suspended in the ocean's mass.
“Hey, hey. Easy there.”
Rafayel was still in his Lemurian form, and this time, under the dim, flickering lights of the bay’s lanterns, you were stunned into an awe-inspiring disquiet.
The flickering warmth casted shadows over his iridescent scales, those once tough and gray plates under the ocean’s darkness glowing from the inside out with a pink-blue flame.
Half of his tail was still submerged in the water, and you couldn’t help but drag your gaze across the stunning length.
Easily a few feet long, you couldn’t even begin to wrap your head around the mental image of how majestic his entire Lemurian form would look underwater. It was just too bad the Hydroweed’s effects were over before you could even get to the good part.
Your thighs were chafing, drawing attention to your gapingly empty cunt. 
Pulling yourself to your knees, you came chest to chest with him. 
Rafayel’s saltwater soaked fingers grasped your cheeks, titling it up to inspect you. 
Trickles of water seeped down his face, darkening the sand with droplets of wetness.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, fraught and remorseful. “I lost track of time. I could’ve seriously injured you.”
“It’s okay.” The both of you flinched back from how hoarse your voice sounded. Clearing your throat, you struggled to put your mushy thoughts into words. “I… enjoyed it.”
Rafayel dropped his hands, his breathing growing ragged. “I should get back to normal—”
“No!” 
You stunned him with your vehemence, scrambling to grip his shoulders, clapping your crazed eyes onto his widened ones.
You’re acting like a mad woman. 
But, he didn’t say that to you. Rafayel grasped your hands, drawing them to his chest, pouring every drop of attention onto you. 
“I want to… try it… here.” 
You pieced together your incoherent request, and a part of you wondered—dreaded—if you had already lost your mind from the lack of oxygen and crushing deep sea pressure. 
Rafayel stared at you for a moment, unspeaking.
Then, he gently dragged you closer. Before you could even squeak, he had you straddling his waist. 
This time, it was your turn to peer down at him, curtains of your wet hair framing your face.
“Take me, then,” his voice was equally as hoarse as yours, though you suspected it wasn’t from ingesting enough saltwater to fill up your lungs. Trembling fingers touched your face, smoothing across your cheeks. “I’m all yours. I’ve been bound to you since the very beginning. You can take me, I won’t fight back. I told you I wouldn’t that night, don’t you remember? I’m keeping my word now.”
Something about the longing in his tone, how those pink-blue eyes yearned to swim in your soul, brought a lump to your throat. 
“Rafayel…”
Strong hands helped to guide your hips over his cock, easing you down with quiet praises and encouragement.
So good for me, baby. Look at you. Taking me so well. Wish I could paint this moment—you look so pretty. All for me. My love. My love. 
“R-Rafayel!” Thin red lines bloomed on his chest from your nails, your eyes rolling back into your head.
Without the sea’s buoyancy to support you, gravity took over, easing you down his bulbous cock.
Rafayel’s thumb circles your clit, rubbing it gently, soothingly, to get you wetter.
Your body felt like it was about to split cleanly into two—he was much too big for you. 
“C-can’t!” you whisper-cried. “I can’t take all of you—ngh.”
His mouth found your nipples, licking and sucking along the fleshy nubs until they were coated with his spit and tightening obscenely; an erotic outline lit by the bay's dim lantern lights.
“You can,” he mumbled in between your breasts. “I know you can.”
The rough strip of his tongue slid from your sternum towards your neck, pausing right at your pulse point. Sharp bites bloomed on your neck from his teeth, and you shiver from the throbbing pain going straight to your clit. 
That strange, heightening sensation was back. You felt much too sensitive, like a lightning rod trembling from an impending electrical storm.
One touch could’ve made you explode.
Rafayel brought your lips to his, tangling his tongue down your throat; stoppering your cries. 
Warm, smooth, distinctively human palms caressed your hips and thighs. 
Almost in, baby, he whispers in between kisses. I can feel every inch of you. 
You flit your eyes to where both your bodies meet, in mute shock from how deep he already was in you.
“You like it, baby?” he breathes warmly on your jaw. “Like watching yourself sit on my cock?” 
Fuck. Stop teasing me, you want to whine. But, the words won’t slip past your clenched teeth. 
His name bounces across the soft sand, the wind picking up and making you shiver. 
The warm glow of the lanterns spill across his sharp cheekbones, planes of his jaw. You’ve never seen someone look this beautiful under a hazy night sky before.
“Tell me if I’m hurting you,” you feel him murmur against your lips. “Say the word, baby. We’ll stop.”
You’re panting now, trying hard not to break your progress and having to start over. Rafayel was about halfway inside, and you forced your body to push and receive. 
Guh, you gasp, tossing your head back. 
“Love seeing you stretch yourself out on my cock, baby,” Rafayel mutters hoarsely—passionately. 
The implicit meaning in his words is clear: I love how you give yourself so willingly to me.
For Rafayel, you would do this ten times over until your body memorizes him. Willing your cunt to make a home for his monster cock even if it would break your spine.
“Almost,” he reassures in a low groan. “You feel s’good baby.”
He’s sweating as well, bullets of exertion not to break his composure and fuck into you mingling with the last of the seawater droplets rolling down his temples.
Rafayel, Rafayel, you whimper his name over and over. Oh God…
Something bubbles inside of you, thick and hot. You think you’re about to spill over, thighs shaking from the effort of holding yourself up. 
Your lover groans, low and lusty, his eyes trapped right in between your legs. “You’re so wet—look. Your little pussy loves me, baby.”
You glance to where he’s telling you to look, and nearly pass out from the embarrassment. 
Thick, pearly droplets are oozing down his merman length, and you would’ve thought it was from him had you not felt your walls start to twitch—more wetness gushing and trickling down to stain his pelvis.
The added lubrication made it easy enough for you to bottom out on his cock, and both your mutual cries of ecstasy reverberated into the dark night.
Shit, shit. Too big. You’re too big for me.
“You can take it,” he mouths your earlobe, kissing down your cheek. “Doing so well for me.”
Your breathing trembles, like a question hanging in thin air. Can you fuck me now? 
Rafayel scoffs and bumps his nose with yours gently. “Always making me do the hard work. You really are my spoiled, pretty princess, aren’t you? Or…” his voice drops, the heat in his eyes almost scorching you. “Do you want to be my good girl?”
You gasp: I do. I want to be your good girl.
He hisses when you start to shift your hips, the motion making your clit catch on his pelvis. You mewl, leaning forward to repeat the same motion; trying to chase after that spark of pleasure over and over again.
Those big, smooth palms cradle your face, pushing your hair back.
Rafayel’s jaw is tense, like he’s biting down on some inner demon you can’t see. 
That’s it. That’s my good girl. 
Your nails leave white crescent moons on his pale shoulders as you ride him, every bump and ridge of his cock brushing your sweet spot. He was so deep in you, almost plunging right past your cervix. 
“Fuck,” he curses. “You’re gonna kill me, baby.”
An arm sweeps you right to his chest, your cheek pressed atop his heartbeat. Rafayel thrusts his hips up, meeting your sensual grinding.
Spit pools in the back of your throat, your eyes squeezed shut as you let your Lemurian lover have his way with you. You part your mouth, mellifluous moans touching the air and turning it golden to his reddened ears.
I love you. His whispers against your throat, the sting of his teeth soothed by the sweetness of his praise and adoration. I love you so much, my good girl.
“You fuck me so good,” the words tumble from your split mouth, recklessly thoughtful. “No one can fuck me like you.”
Yeah, he pants, mouthing your pulse point. Cream on this cock, baby. It’s all yours. His hands span across your lower back, traversing down to grip your ass and spreading you wider for him.
Give me everything you’ve got, Princess. 
His cock plunges so deep inside of you, and you were sure that if he came right now, he might’ve knocked you up in one try. 
All yours. Rafayel was all yours. 
You lean up, arms resting on either side of his head as the sand bites into your skin. 
Rafayel thinks he might’ve died and gone to heaven. He watches, mesmerized, as your tits sway right in front of his face. You’re fucking him now, meeting each fluid thrust he had to give; bouncing on his lap like you were riding out a desperate heat.
His thighs tense, and he feels your pussy clench down on him. 
Fuck, you stutter, and so do your hips. I’m close. 
He squeezes your ass, smacks it with both palms.
Your breathing catches, and you ride him even harder. Faster.
“Fuck,” those pretty eyes were hooded, latched on your bouncing tits and stiff nipples. “Look so good fucking me—you love using me, don’t you, Master?” 
You gasp, and Rafayel feels your composure slip when you squeeze down on him. He almost cums right there and then. But, he fights it off, needing to see you lose control first.
The sight of your stickiness frothing at the base of his cock nearly makes him white out in pleasure, getting messier with every stroke of his non-human cock. 
He’s never had a human before in his Lemurian form, but it’s something straight out of a wild, wet dream.
Your skin was so, so soft in comparison to his hard scales that he’s almost afraid of hurting you with them.
But, you prove you’re made of tougher stuff when you lean back, bracing both hands on the girth of his tail. 
Showing off your puffy pussy and glistening hole taking every inch of him like it was made for this and only for this purpose.
He feels himself drowning in you. No one has ever taken him this deep. His mouth falls open, a low grunt touching your hot ears. Good girl… good fucking girl. His praises make you warm all over. You would do anything and everything to earn his devotion. But, Rafayel doesn’t make you do it—he gives it to you freely. One large hand smoothed over your belly, your tits, pinching your nipples and smirking inwardly when you gasp and groan. 
Breathy whimpers resound, his thumb on your clit rubbing out full body shudders. The sky above spins, like he’s being sucked into and about to be spat out of a whirlpool.
His eyes bounce from the softness of your belly, your tits jiggling, and then back down to your pretty pussy taking all of him in.
“Like what you see?” 
Rafayel flits his gaze back up. Your eyes were two pools of smoldering heat, about to burn him alive.
You grab his wandering hand, pressing it right over your stomach. “I can feel you here.” He twitches, and you gasp. “So, so deep.”
Sloppy sounds of your bodies meeting; you were so, so wet and perfect. Your pussy was gushing, fighting between squeezing him out or sucking him in. 
I’m gonna cum, baby, he grunts. The vein in his neck tightens, and your whimper almost sets him off.
Gonna cum so deep inside of you. Make you so round and perfect with my babies. You’re my Queen, aren’t you? My love. I’ll love you until the seas dry up. You’re mine forever. 
It’s that tinge of possessiveness which does you under. You were putty to his deep, gravelly voice; those words of unending devotion and sin.
His thick, dark lashes flutter, those pretty eyes rolling back into his head.
Fuck, baby. He grabs onto your hips, looking for something to steady him. “I need you… I’m gonna cum,” he whines, and it’s pathetic really—how much you’ve affected him.
If he was a lesser man, Rafayel might’ve called you his weakness. But, you were more than that.
You were the reason he woke up in the mornings. The reason he relentlessly pursued the passages of time and space to find you; you were the muse to his madness. 
“Do it for me, baby,” you pant, and fall back into his arms. Chest to chest, lips to lips, every breath you took was exhaled by his own. “Cum for me.”
Make me yours forever, Rafayel.
The world goes white, and your pussy quivers around him, an ending opera note suspended in mid-air.
It comes crashing down, slo-mo turned to a normal pace when time rushes back to engulf your sluggish shore.
His cum fills you up, thicker and running hotter than a human’s. It felt strange; pulsating inside of you, glob after glob. Your pussy shudders and breaks, physical and emotional walls all torn down for him; voice hoarse and edged with mania. Rafayel, Rafayel, Rafayel…
You mumble his name like a prayer while he drags your lips to his, kissing you like an oath.
He feels you shudder around him, growing weaker like a kitten. It would be so easy for him to pierce your neck with his teeth, cut through your jugular with his scales. 
But, Rafayel tames his primal, oceanic urge to destroy, reining it back in favor of nosing your hair.
“Felt so good,” he mumbles tiredly. “Are you okay, my little conch shell?”
You hum, shift your hips. The bulbous head of his cock brushes the opening of your cervix. “I can’t believe I took you so deep.” You drift off and in a few minutes, feel him go from soft to half-hard in you again. 
“Are you still turned on, baby?” you ask innocently, voice soft and frayed with exhaustion. Rafayel swivels his face away, trying to hide his red ears.
“N-no.”
You huff a laugh, using all the strength in your jelly-like limbs to sit up. Something catches your attention, and in the corner of your eye, you pick up the dark strands, fisting it close to your mouth.
Rafayel watches, unsure what you’re intending to do. He sits up, squints, and almost gasps.
That’s enough Hydroweed for you to last a night under the ocean. 
He’s about to stop you, when you ingest it all in one go.
The second you convulse, he pushes you back into the ocean, your gasp of relief second to only his bruising kiss completely devouring your mouth. 
Your legs wrap around his waist, and your back meets the ocean floor again. This time, you take the lead, rolling him off to straddle his waist again. 
Rafayel glances at you, gorgeous pastel eyes hooded. 
He notices how comfortable you’re getting underwater; how easy it is for you to scoot down his torso, your playful smirk making his cock and heartstrings throb. 
“Baby—” he mumbles, only to be cut off by the sight of you kissing his bulbous tip.
Rafayel isn’t a believer of god per say (coming from his own experience as a retired sea deity), but at the sight of your pretty lips skimming his merman tip, he thinks he could give religion another shot. 
What’re you doing? His whisper carries across the currents.
Ssh, you hush him, rimming the tip of your tongue around his flushed head. You don’t miss how his tail twitches, cock now painfully at full mast. 
Isn’t it obvious? You mumble, kissing the tip reverently. I want to taste my Lemurian's pretty cock.
He seizes, back arching, putty in your hands when you take him down as deep as your little throat allows. 
What else you couldn’t fit, you used your hands to jack up and down.
Soft hisses slip past his clenched teeth. “You’re driving me crazy, baby.”
Mhm, you slur, flickering your hazy, fucked out gaze to his flushed face. Tastes so good, you whisper, and Rafayel was glad the ocean didn’t show the line of drool that usually trickles down your jaw; your fucked out expression which would make his control snap instantly. 
You would need to consume at least three more mouthfuls of Hydroweed before he was fully done with you. 
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Luckily, Thomas’ yacht came with some fluffy towels.
Rafayel had wrapped you in one while he laid the other under your back; content to curl his tail around you, still in his Lemurian form. The honeywood deck was warm to the touch, the balmy evening offering comfort and respite from hours underneath the cold, dark ocean. 
“So…” he quips, not one for stewing in silence. “Questions? Thoughts? Comments?” 
You fight back a smile. 
“Was there really eggs put up inside of me? Swore I felt a lot of round and hard things sloshing inside.”
“That… would be my tip.” Rafayel flicks your nose when you scoff. “On a scale of one to ten, how freaked out would you be if I said I did actually put some eggs up in your body and it had to be fertilized so the rest would start falling out of you like gelatinous goo until the only one takes?” 
You blink. “Pretty freaked out, if I’m being honest.”
“So… a nine?” 
“More like—” you lifted your hand and made a so-so motion. “—a six, at best. I’m kinda used to your bullshit by now, babe.” 
“Hey!” Rafayel tugs on the ends of your hair, making you laugh. Growing serious now, he murmurs, “So, you’re absolutely fine with being knocked up with a half-Lemurian kid?” 
“Depends,” you mumble mildly. “Am I the first one you’re doing this with?”
Barely missing a beat, he nodded. “The only one. Never had time to sleep around. Always busy running a kingdom. Blah-blah. Typical God of the Sea stuff. No biggie.”
“Aw,” you coo, “I’m so honored you waited for me.” 
You expected him to scoff or roll his eyes, not lapse into a serious quietness. Rafayel’s silence stretched on, and you perched your jaw on his shoulder.
“Hey. Penny for your thoughts?” 
“Hmm.” Rafayel tugs you closer, grabbing your hand and pressing it to his cheek. His lips are inches apart from yours, warm breath touching your parted mouth. You taste him on your tongue, invigorating yet comforting.
A well-worn sign of home. 
“Just that I would do it all over again. Wait for you, I mean. Even if it takes a long, long time.”
A few centimeters and 800 years stand between the two of you. 
But, for tonight, you breach the distance and kiss him, grateful that you had been given this cherished memory together with Rafayel.
— rbs and feedback are appreciated !!
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©️ all works belong to lalunanymph. do not copy, repost or translate my work across other platforms.
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rafey-baby · 8 days ago
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older!rafe can’t always be mean to his delicate flower, can he?
18+ mdni!
c/w: fluff with a little bit of angst in the beginning, older!rafe feeding sensitive!reader pasta & being v suggestive, slight subspace, smut: oral (f receiving), overstimulation & use of daddy
wc: 2k
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Sock-covered feet pad along the hardwood floors when she finally hears the lock of the front door turning. Rafe’s home later than usual— a fact she’s entirely too aware of since she’s been impatiently waiting for him to return ever since he left her this morning without so much as a goodbye.  
Usually, she’d stir awake to him smearing kisses all over her face and mumbling sweetened words about how much he’s going to miss her during his meetings— sometimes even wake her up with his cock prodding at her entrance before fucking her all sleepy and sloppy until she’s a sobbing mess.  
However, she assumes he was still mad at her because she forgot to let him know she was going out for drinks after her lecture before her battery had died. Therefore, she hadn’t received his several calls or the texts filled with concern and only a few hours later, did she remember that she’d never actually sent the message regarding her whereabouts. 
When he came to pick her up after she’d borrowed her friend’s phone in order to reach him, he was clearly displeased; merely muttering out a “ask you to do one thing and you can’t even do that. You know how fuckin’ worried I was?” and crudely telling her to go sleep in the guest room because “daddy doesn’t feel like dealing with your shit tonight”, which had resulted in wet droplets surfacing to her waterline while she kept apologizing over and over again, but to no avail.  
In the morning, she’d woken up to a tear-stained pillowcase and a headache. And when she tiptoed over to the bathroom, she realized that the entire house was desolate; he hadn’t even left a note.  
Therefore, she’s not exactly sure how to approach him, hesitant in her movements before she sees him in front of her in all his glory.  
“Hi,” her voice is quiet, but her forlorn face lights up nonetheless.
Rafe is in the process of mindlessly kicking off his shoes when he looks up; a tired smile tugging at his lips when she practically tumbles into his arms in a greeting. 
“Missed you,” she mumbles against his crisp button up when he rests his big hands on her hips in an attempt to steady her.  
“Missed you too,” he murmurs into her hair. “Got you something,” he reluctantly pulls away in order to present her with a bouquet of pink lilies; her favorites. 
“What’s this for?” her moony eyes stare up at him in bewilderment. 
“Drove past a flower shop…guess they made me think of you,” he admits, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek; confusing her to no end. 
“But I thought—” she utters out, hesitant to take the flowers she feels unworthy of.  
“That I was mad at you?”  
She nods, looking up at him with guilt swimming in her eyes. 
He lets out a sigh. 
“Listen, I was, uh, maybe a little too harsh on you last night, okay? I know how forgetful you can be. Was just worried when you weren’t home and didn’t answer your phone until hours later. Thought something happened, you know?” he explains with a calmness that placates her racing mind as she accepts his gift.  
“I know, I’m sorry. Won’t happen again, promise. Texted you today the second I was home, right?”  
“You did,” he confirms as he peels off his suit jacket before sniffing the air. “Smells good, what’re you making?”  
“Oh, I made you dinner,” she says bashfully, almost as if waiting for his approval. 
“You did? All by yourself?” his brows climb his forehead in surprise.  
She nods, a soft smile on her lips before he’s ushering her towards the kitchen and plucking a glass vase from the top shelf for her.
Usually, he’s the one cooking for them since she’s not greatest in the kitchen, always so tired after studying the whole day, she’d probably forget the stove on and cause some sort of a fire due to her absentminded nature. Therefore, he prefers to prepare his girl a nurturing meal whenever he doesn’t have to work late.  
“How was uni today?” he asks as she sets the now flower-filled vase on their dining table. 
“A lot. Was kinda stressed the whole day cause I have so much homework and reading to do, don’t know how I’m supposed to have time for all of it. And then have this group project and the deadline for this essay approaching and…I don’t think my brain works anymore,” she sighs out when she peers down at the steaming bowl of spaghetti Bolognese he places on the counter.  
“Good thing you don’t need to worry that head of yours over anything with me. Let daddy do the thinking for you, yeah?” Rafe’s voice is as smooth as honey, causing her to blink up at him— something cottony dusting over her mind in response to his sugary cadence.  
Strong arms lift her up and place her on the marble countertop before he settles right between her thighs, like a puzzle piece she’s been missing the entire day; tall frame hovering over her even as she’s practically perched on a pedestal.  
Then, he’s picking up the plate in the most casual manner and contently shoving a forkful of pasta into his mouth before groaning in satisfaction.  
“Shit, this is amazing,” he praises around the mouthful.  
She mumbles out a flustered thank you, her thoughts all over the place since she thought he’d still be mad, but then suddenly he’s not. In fact, he’s seemingly in a great mood.  
“Did you eat yet?” 
“No, was, um…waiting for you. Didn’t wanna eat alone,” her volume is nearly inaudible.
He stops chewing.  
“Waiting for me, huh?” he rasps out before he’s lifting the fork closer to her mouth.  
She looks up at him, puzzled.  
“Open,” he orders and she has no choice but to obey— let him feed her because truthfully, whenever she’s around him she gets a little dumb; can’t really focus on anything except his low drawl and gemstone eyes.  
“Good, right?” 
She hums her agreement around the bite, barely registering that some of the tomato sauce stains her chin in the process.  
“Always so messy, huh?” he tuts disapprovingly, even if he’s the one holding the fork.  
However, before her mushy brain has the time to even comprehend what he’s doing, he’s laving the flat of his tongue under her mouth; cleaning it up for her.  
“There we go,” he murmurs as he rubs a thumb over the spot for good measure.  
She swallows.  
“Want some water?” he asks and she nods, all of a sudden unable to utter out words.
Then, he’s tipping a glass of ice-cold water to her lips, carefully watching her gulp down the liquid before he decides she’s had enough— withdrawing the cup in order to drink some of it himself.   
He continues feeding her every other bite and making casual conversation, all the while she feels herself softly slipping into a very specific headspace. And before she realizes, he’s placing the empty dish in the sink with a slight clatter; their bellies full and happy.   
She doesn’t think she wants to eat by herself ever again. 
Then, her foggy mind registers him in front of her again as he pulls her closer— warm palms slipping under her top and his thumbs idly smoothing over her tummy while she quietly stares at him with hearts for eyes.
“You put this tiny thing on just for me, hm?” he questions as his eyes drop down to her cleavage; the pale pink lace doing a very poor job of concealing what’s underneath since she’s forgone a bra (and pants), as she usually does whenever she’s merely loitering around their home. 
“Look so pretty in this,” his dreamy voice rumbles as he swipes a thumb over a covered nipple, causing her to let out a faint gasp at the sudden contact. 
“Ray…” she hums out while he keeps rubbing over the squishy part of her body he knows gets her buzzing.
“Hm? You feelin’ floaty already?” he asks with a gentle cadence. And she’s not sure how he always seems to know just the right words to say in order to turn her into clay.  
“Yeah, missed you so much,” her hazy eyes flicker over his face while he simply gazes at her, before he’s smearing his mouth on hers.  
There’s something hungry, primal in the way he groans against her lips— causing a whimper to escape her throat in response. 
Then, all of a sudden, he’s lifting her over his shoulder as if she weighs nothing more than a single paperclip; making her squeak out a sound of surprise when he jokingly smacks her ass while walking out of the room before throwing her on the bed.  
“Let daddy say hi to his favorite girl, yeah?” he coaxes her before he’s prying her thighs apart and nuzzling his face into her cunt through the material of her panties; nose bumping against her clit, making her shift closer to him.
“Missed my pussy so much, you know? Wanted to fuck you nice ’n slow last night but you never came home.”  
“I’m sorry, daddy,” she can’t help but whimper out when his warm tongue licks over the already dampening fabric of her underwear.  
“Yeah? You gon’ make it up to me? Let me eat you ’till I forgive you?” 
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever you want,” she blabbers, a whine leaving her vocal cords when he plucks the soaked through material to the side and blows on her sensitive cunt.  
“Shit, you’re so wet already,” he says in awe, letting spit drip down his tongue and onto her folds anyway. Then, he’s wrapping his lips around her clit, making her cry out because she can already feel her orgasm lingering underneath the surface. 
“Need to come, can I? Please m’gonna— ” she says, almost in a trance; already so wound up. And the way he’s practically torturing her achy button with his mouth isn’t really helping. 
After he’s hummed his agreement, she’s not able to hold it in any longer— his tongue poking at her opening when the knot in her belly unfolds. She’s shaking, thighs yearning to close, if not for his strong arms holding them open as he groans around her, seemingly lost in a daze with her taste and smell practically suffocating him.
Since he knows how insatiable she tends to be, he refuses to pull away from between her thighs. And two more orgasms later, she’s a whimpering muddle; desperately trying to drag her hips away from his unrelenting hold. However, he’s entirely too strong and she doesn’t stand a chance.
“Ray, s’too much, need a break—” she complains, eyes beginning to turn watery in response to the overwhelming pressure.
However, despite her protests, he doesn’t stop. Instead, he begins to mess with her entirely too sensitive clit with his fingers now— pressing and pulling and making her whine as tears trickle down her cheeks and she tries to fruitlessly wiggle away from him once more.   
“Nah, you’re good. You forgot daddy does the thinking for you now, hm? And he wants you to give him a few more, think you can do that?” he mumbles against her sticky folds, stuffing the tip of his tongue into her weepy hole as an effort to persuade her.
“I don’t know if I can—” 
“Shh, jus’ wanna make you feel nice, you don’t want me to?” he feigns hurt when he lifts up his head, beginning to mouth over the soft skin of her inner thighs to pacify her; his slight stubble tickling her in the process and making her twitch.
“No, I do, I do…”  
“Then quit whinin’ and let me take care of you, hm? Show you how much I love you,” he coaxes her to give in. And when he puts it like that, she thinks it does sound rather romantic…
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msgexymunson · 8 months ago
Text
The Ink Shop
Description: Desperate for a job, you answer an advertisement not knowing it's a tattoo shop. It's not particularly difficult work, except for one thing: having to deal with Eddie Munson. 
Warnings: NSFW, minors DNI or I'll tell your parents, fem reader, thick sexual tension, angst and smut. Fingering. 
A/N: I finally wrote it! The teach me fic I've been day dreaming about forever. This will be part one of three, and honestly this is one of the hottest things I've written. If you enjoy it, please comment and reblog, it means the world to me. 
8k words
Masterlist Part 2
Screwing your nose up in confusion, you look at the meticulously cut snippet of newspaper neatly attached to your resume with a paperclip. Sure enough, receptionist and administrator wanted for a place called ‘The Ink Shop’. 
The outside of the building looks a little bleak, all decked out in black with frosted windows, but the fading lettering above does indeed spell out ‘The Ink Shop’. 
Weird. This does not look like a printers. 
You smooth down a minor wrinkle in your white shirt and open the door with unsure hands, the bell above ringing out loudly. 
Oh. 
This is not a printers. This is a tattoo shop. 
The thought hadn't even crossed your mind. The noise is a cacophony of buzzing, rock music and loud conversation. Art hangs on every available wall, the wallpaper underneath a royal purple, faded over time. There's frames upon frames of predesigned pieces for people to choose from, and an enormous wooden counter, black and gouged with use, directly in front of the doors. 
Taking a confidence boosting breath you march forward, pencil skirt stretching and heels clicking on the black and white linoleum, and stand by the counter. No one seems to have noticed your arrival, and a polite cough is not going to cut it. 
“Hello?” Calling out to the shop, a devilishly handsome tattooed man in a ripped band shirt, black jeans and scuffed army boots turns his head. Loose dark curls escape a low bun and swivel with him, framing his animated face. He saunters over to the counter and towers over you, giving you an appraising look. 
“You old enough to be in here sweetheart?” He asks, amused, as he points to the sign on the wall that states ‘Strictly Over 21s, no exceptions’. 
“Yes?” You're trying to be confident but it comes out as a question, entirely taken aback by the strength of his stare. 
“Oh, well then I'm Eddie,” he holds out a hand and you're forced to reach up to shake it, but to your surprise he doesn't let go. The skin is rougher than you thought it would be, and absolutely covered in small tattoos. “What is it today? Let me guess, cover up an ex boyfriend's name? I can help you forget all about him.” 
The grin he shoots back is nothing short of predatory. All you can think of is that old childhood song, never smile at a crocodile…
“No, no, I'm here about the job?” 
He looks genuinely surprised, taking in your outfit in another flagrant stare. 
“Really? You?” 
“Yes, me.” You respond, cheeks flushing in annoyance. 
“Hey, Mac!” He calls over his shoulder and a big guy with a shaved head lowers his tattoo gun, glancing over at you both. “This girl's after a job?” 
Mac stands up slowly and begins to walk over. 
“You can let go now princess.” 
Staring at Eddie dumbfoundedly, you realise his grip on your hand has softened completely. Whipping your hand away, you flash him a defiant eye. It's ineffective; he merely grins wider and winks at you, poking his tongue out playfully. You see a hint of silver, a tongue piercing. 
“Hey there, I'm Mac, the owner.” another handshake, but gentler and brief. You introduce yourself and go to hand him your resume. 
A phone rings on the counter and Mac shouts “no!” just as Eddie picks it up. 
“Mac’s Roadkill Café, from your grill to ours.” Eddie delivers the line as smooth as silk, never taking his eyes off you. “Yeah, it's Eddie, of course. Oh, I'll tell him. Thanks.” 
As Eddie turns to Mac he's given a small but effective slap to the back of the head by Mac. 
“What did I tell you, stop answering like that!” 
Eddie just grins wider and looks at you again, a fake pout on his full lips. 
“You see that? Harassment in the workplace. Wanna kiss it better?” 
Mac shuts his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose, then turns to face you again. 
“Are you immediate start?” 
“Er, yeah. I've got my resume, and references here-” 
“Listen Miss, if you can read and write, answer a phone, and put up with that-” he says, gesturing a thumb at Eddie, “then you've got the job.” 
Thank God, two of those references were your best friend with different names. Stunned, you just nod fast.
“Great. Tomorrow morning. We open at 10am.” 
Saying goodbye, you turn to exit, and risk one final glance over your shoulder. Eddie's still at the counter. A disarming wink, and then the door shuts behind you. 
********************
So, not exactly what you expected, but a job's a job. After getting a degree, you'd assumed doors would open, but a string of coffee houses later and here you are. You'll take it. 
It's 9:30 am, and you stand outside, wondering whether or not to try the door. Keen, but not too keen. It's a line you're trying to toe without much experience, especially with an establishment like this. 
A pretty woman with an undercut and a butterfly neck tattoo stirs you out of your calculations. 
“Hey, I'm Chloe. You're the new girl, right? Eddie bet you'd be early.” 
Blushing at the entirely accurate first impression, you try to stop your nose scrunching in distaste. As if reading your mind, Chloe chuckles.
“Ah, don't worry about him, he's an idiot. Come on, I'll show you the ropes.” 
Chloe is the piercer that basically rents a place in the shop, where she's been for around three years, she explains. There's also Julio, who does more realistic tattoo work, and Miranda who works part time. 
Chloe turns out to be warm and welcoming, showing you how they book clients in, how to take payments, and the phone note system. It's straightforward work, stuff you'll master in no time. In fact, you feel comfortable enough by 10 am to sit at the counter on your own.
Mac arrives on time, giving you a quick check in and taking down all your information on a yellow legal pad. 
“Do you not have a computer in here?” you ask, genuinely puzzled. 
“Oh no, not yet. I don't know how to work those things, Miss.” Mac chuckles, and gets to his station to prepare for his first client.
At 10:45 am Eddie walks through the door as if he owns the place. 
Your eyes widen at his brazen lateness, but no one seems to bat an eyelid. It boils your blood; to be that disrespectful and clearly not care. How could someone act like that? 
“Hey princess, didn't think you'd come back,” he smiles, reaching for your hand. 
Oh I'm not falling for that again. 
You pull your hand into your lap, expecting trickery from him. A smug grin smears across his face at the gesture, as if he knew you'd do that. It makes you even more annoyed. 
“Eddie, the book says you start,” you say, flicking through the tome in front of you, “ah, at 10 am today.” 
“It's walk-in Wednesday sweetheart. There's no one here.” 
He's got a point. Chloe had explained the tattoo artists work a shift of Wednesdays, someone is always available for walk-ins for small and pre designed pieces. Today is Eddie's turn, and he's right, no one is here. 
“Well, there could have been,” you snark back, folding your arms. 
He crosses into the shop, pushing the little gate open and stands next to you, arms crossed. The height you had is now lost, forcing you to look up at him. 
“As far as I know, you ain't the boss of me. I suggest taking the stick out of your ass before you come here.” 
Mouth falling open in outrage, you move to reply but he's already turned away. 
“Oh, and princess, there ain't a dress code.” 
He's gone, disappearing upstairs. Blushing crimson, you cross your arms as if you can hide the conservative outfit you're wearing. 
You're beginning to see why Mac asked if you could put up with Eddie. 
********************
Halfway through the day, you realise just why Mac puts up with Eddie. 
“Hey! Seeing if I can book with Eddie?” 
“Any appointments with Eddie?” 
“Just checking to see if Eddie had any cancellations?” 
It seems most calls are about him. As you check his schedule, it's not only fully booked for the next 6 months, they've even started a waiting list at the back. 
“Any walk-ins?”
The words next to your ear make you jump bodily, almost losing your place on your chair in alarm. 
“You scared me! No, I would have said,” turning to him, you're sucked into those deep brown eyes once again. “Why do you do walk-in Wednesdays if you're so… so popular?” 
Eddie flashes a smile at you, full of self importance. “I don't know sweetheart, Van Gogh wasn't made to doodle!” Shouting the last part at the back of Mac's head, he turns to you. “We just divided the shifts, so it was fair, that's all. Why, want a tattoo?” 
You roll your eyes. “No, I was just wondering.”
“Do you have any, princess?” 
“Not that it's any of your business, but no, I don't.” 
The laugh that rips from Eddie's chest is hearty and full of amusement. 
“You work in a tattoo shop and you don't have any? That's practically blasphemy!” 
The little bell above the door rings, and a nervous guy looks around before walking in. Before you see what he wants, you shout to Eddie's retreating back. 
“Van Gogh was only famous after he died, you know!” 
It's a little later on in the day; you've done a stock take, ordered more ink, and neatened up the consent sheets three times. The phone hasn't rung in a while, and you're bored out of your mind. 
Chloe walks over, coat in her hand. 
“Hey, how you getting on?” 
“I'm good, just bored.” 
She laughs, “it's not always this quiet, mid week and all. Mac's done for the day, and I'm heading off. You gonna be OK?” 
You glance over to Eddie, who to your surprise is tattooing his own fingers. 
“What, with the untrained monkey? I'll live.” 
She laughs harder at that, “he's not so bad, once you get to know him.” Lowering her voice, she whispers, “he's good at some things, you know.” The conspiratorial wink fills in what she isn't saying. Cheeks flushed, you gawp at Eddie and back at Chloe. 
“Huh? W-what, are you like, an item?” You ask, entirely thrown. 
“Oh no, he's not exactly boyfriend material. It was just one night, but bloody hell. Anyway, it's not like that anymore, we're just friends now. Maybe you two should just, you know.” 
A blush floods your face, almost reaching the roots of your hair. “I don't- I don't, do that.” 
“I'm just saying, it's an option. It'd stop the bickering at least. I can sense the tension from all the way over there.” 
Without a further word, she leaves you sitting on your stool, trying to remember how to breathe. 
Right, let's just play nice. 
Walking over to his station, you try to glimpse what he's tattooing. 
“I thought Van Gogh wasn't made to doodle” you quip, trying to keep it light. 
“This is different” he responds, not looking up at you.
“You know, that's a waste of a needle.” 
Eddie turns the machine off and rolls his eyes at you. 
“Who made you Princess of the Needles, hmmm?” 
“Mac did actually, when he asked me to check the stock,” you reply hotly, folding your arms. Stopping for a second, you take a breath. Play nice, you're supposed to be playing nice. 
“Sorry, I didn't mean to-” 
Eddie turns the machine back on and continues with his impromptu tattoo. 
“Can't you just be… professional?” You ask over the buzzing. 
“Can't you just relax for a second? No ones here. Fuck, you need to get laid.” 
Mouth dropping open in shock, you grab your bag and stomp out of the store, anger fuelling every step. 
********************
Right, be calm, put together. You've dealt with worse people. 
It's true. At the coffee shop you had on edge caffeine addicts shout in your face almost on a daily basis, but none of them got under your skin like Eddie did. Then again, none of them had spat truths like venom in your face.
Breathe. Just breathe. 
Taking the leap, you walk into the shop, coffees and a tray of donuts in hand; a small peace offering. To your surprise, he is already at his station, sorting through ink pots. 
You make quick work of handing out coffee and donuts to everyone, until you reach his side. There's plastic wrap around one of his fingers, you assume from his little tattoo session yesterday. It only serves to remind you of how tetchy you were. 
“Morning Eddie.” 
“So you came back. Tough little princess ain't ya? Remove the stick from your ass yet?” The grin he flashes you is wide but there's a bite to his words. 
He's trying to rile you up, but you ignore it, thrusting a coffee at him. 
“I'll be nice if you will.” 
Tension laces the air as he stares at your outstretched hand, but he takes the coffee. 
“I'm sorry Eddie.” 
Opening the box of donuts, you gesture for him to take one. He does, stuffing half of it into his mouth. 
“What about you?” you ask.
“Huh?” He mumbles through a mouthful of crumbs. 
“Are you sorry…?” 
“What for?” 
Setting your jaw, your hand is about two seconds from slapping the shit out of him, but you need the money. So, you huff and walk away. 
“What did I do?” He huffs, shouting it to the shop. 
“You should just say sorry, you've clearly upset her.” Chloe calls over to him, a slight smile on her face. 
“Yeah, how do you know?” 
“You upset everyone Eddie.” She laughs, and stands to greet her first client. 
It's a tense kind of day, with neither you nor Eddie backing down, only speaking to each other if absolutely necessary. By the time everyone's left it's just you and him again. 
He's finishing up with a client, telling them about aftercare as they gush about their new ink. It's difficult to deny, the guy is talented. This phoenix tattoo looks like it's popping right off of the skin, the flames so bright and detailed you could swear you saw them move. 
Once they've left, there's an awkward pause. Eddie breaks the silence first. 
“Listen, I'm sorry sweetheart. I shouldn't have been rude to you. So I'll make you a deal. I'll give you a tattoo, for free, and we ask each other questions, get to know each other. What do you say?” 
Smiling in spite of yourself, you turn to face him. “And why would I want a tattoo?” 
He visibly relaxes at your grin, and flashes one of his own. “Come on, I'm the best. I promise I'll be gentle.” 
“We close at six, so it'll have to wait.” 
Eddie looks at the clock, and bobs his head with each tick. Twenty seconds later he turns to you, eyebrows raised.
“Fine, I suppose it is a bit silly to work in a tattoo shop with no ink.” 
He punches the air with glee, forcing you to smile despite your better judgement. 
“Well then, what are you thinking, got any ideas in mind?” 
“I want a heart on my hip” he groans, putting his face in his hands, “hang on, before you judge, I want one like this.” 
Pulling a book from your bag, you turn to the page neatly bookmarked. It's an anatomical heart from a textbook you own, a line and dot drawing.
“Oh.” Eddie's eyes light up, “that's pretty metal, actually. So, you just happen to have this on you?” 
“No, I've been thinking about it for a while. It's… not what people would expect. And when I got the job here, I was working up the courage to get it. Carrying around the book was a promise to myself, I think.” 
He busies himself with getting a stencil ready, the drawing supplied speeding up the process. 
“Right, climb on up princess, show me where you want it.”
Blushing, you unzip your skirt at the back and roll it down slightly, shifting your blouse up high. The smile Eddie gives you is salacious, but he doesn't say a word. 
“Right here?” Softly his fingertips graze you, making you jump. That simple act crackles over your skin in an electricity unknown to you. 
“Y-yes,” you practically whisper it, face crimson. 
“So, questions. Can I go first?” 
“Sure” you nod, feeling vulnerable flashing this much skin. 
“OK,” he starts, pressing the stencil down, “I'll start with an easy one. How old are you?” 
“23.” 
He nods, prepping the needle, “your turn princess.” 
“How old are you?” 
“Ah, copycat,” he grins, testing the gun, the sudden noise making you jump, “I'm 30 sweetheart. I know, I look younger.” 
Act younger is more like it. 
“I'm gonna start, you still alright?” 
“Uh huh.” 
“Atta girl. It'll feel like a scratch.” 
He leans forward as his words burn your insides. Atta girl? Part of you wanted to tell him you're not a fucking horse, but another, deeper, part keens at the praise, kicking it's feet and twirling its hair like some dizzy schoolgirl.
The needle touches and you jump, but it's fine. It's easy. If anything, it's rather nice? You gasp at the feeling, your feet wiggling. 
“Right, next question. Why here, why this job?” 
The gun is moving across your skin, consuming all rational thought. You could lie, but a part of you feels like he'd know somehow. 
“I thought it was a printers shop, or a copy place.” 
He laughs briefly, but continues to focus on your new ink. 
“I knew it. Pretty, innocent thing like you, wandering into this den of depravity? Too good to be true.” 
Glazing over his comment, you think of a question to ask. 
“How did you start working here?” 
Eddie scoffs and turns off his machine for a moment, “you need to get creative, stop using my questions.” 
“I really want to know!” You say, meeting his derisory look. 
“Fine, quid pro quo and all that shit. Been here seven years. I begged. I begged Mac for an apprenticeship everyday for a week. He gave in, and here I am. Ask something else, that was boring.” 
You wrack your brains, trying to think of something original, far too aware of the steadying hand that he's pushing onto your abdomen. 
“What band is that?” 
It's the only thing that pops into your mind. He follows your eye line to his t-shirt. 
“Oh this? This is my band, Corroded Coffin. You should come see us sometime.” 
“Oh, what do you play?” 
His face lights up, “I sing, and play guitar. That's why my fingers are so rough-” he holds one up, covered in black latex, “-oh yeah, gloves.” 
After you both share a chuckle, there's a breath of quiet between you, except for the sound of the tattoo gun.
“My turn,” he says, smiling at your hip, “I gotta know, are you a virgin?” 
It's a miracle that he's as responsive as he is, since the question knocks you sideways. You sit up in shock, but he's already moved the needle off and away. 
“You can't just ask that, it's… it's rude!” you splutter, face glowing red. 
There's no trace of apology on his face. In fact, his grin only widens with your reply. 
“I thought so. Don't worry, I'm not gonna tease you about it.” 
Laying back down, you try to think of something to say, but it just doesn't arrive. He can read you like an open book and it's deeply unsettling, not to mention embarrassing. 
“Your turn princess.” 
“I don't want to play anymore.” 
“Oh come on, I'm being nice! Ask me something.” 
“Fine. What was your last wet dream about?” 
To your dismay, he smiles yet again.
“You, sweetheart.” 
Huffing, you cross your arms in annoyance. “Fine, don't answer.” 
He's focusing on your tattoo, tongue poking out in concentration, “I'm nearly done, then you can go back to hating me.” 
“I don't hate you. I've never hated anyone,” you respond in truth. Eddie's eyebrows raise, but he remains focused. 
“Really? You must have had a much better childhood than mine.”
It's quiet for a bit. You're not sure how to respond to that, feeling the cloud of his memory hanging thickly in the air between you. 
“All done.” 
“Huh?” 
He chuckles and points at your new ink, “take a look.” 
It's beautiful. All line and dot work, like it was pulled from the book itself and glued to your hip. 
“It's amazing Eddie. Thank you.” 
The grin he shoots you is warm as he wraps your new ink and then removes his gloves. “No problem. I'll lock up, the sheets on aftercare are right there. But you knew that.” 
Smiling affectionately, you take one and stand up, hovering for a second. 
“Eddie what do I owe-” 
“-not a damn thing. See you in the morning, princess.”
********************
The next few days were much more pleasant. Eddie was flirty, yes, but he seemed to understand when to stop. You had been nicer to him, biting back on the comments when you could. There was a rhythm to it, a constant dance of him flustering you and you annoying him. 
Things really felt like they were falling into place. Until Eddie decided to cross the line. 
Walk in Wednesday again, and the shop was dead. Julio was on shift, sitting in the back having a nap. 
“Hey Mac, can I ask you something?” 
“Sure, what is it Miss?” 
“Well, how do people know about our Wednesdays?” 
“Mostly word of mouth. We handed out flyers before, but it didn't really pick up. Honestly, I'm thinking of scrapping it.” He shrugs, taking a sip of coffee. 
“Before you do, I have an idea. I can design some flyers, get them out to the coffee shop I used to work at. It's by campus, I'm sure a few students would jump at the chance. You could offer a student discount, get them in the door?” You stare at him wide eyed, hoping he likes the idea. The little speech was one you'd practised about fourteen times before actually saying it to him. 
He stares at you for a moment, then smiles. “You know, that's a good idea. I like it. Tell you what, you make it a success and I'll give you a raise.” 
“Oh, thank you! I'll get on it.” You beam, and start planning the flyer. 
Ten minutes later you have your head down, your attention entirely on the paper in front of you. The noisy shop was purely a background soundtrack, including the approaching footsteps. Then, there's a whisper, directly in your ear. 
“What you up to, princess?” 
“Fuck!” 
You scream it out and jump so high you fall off your stool. Eddie's in bits, laughing so hard he's clutching his stomach. 
“I'm sorry I didn't mean to,” he says, looking the least sorry you've ever seen a person look. 
Clambering off the floor to berate him, your mouth flops open when you hear a rip. As you desperately turn your head to look down, you see where your pencil skirt has torn right next to the seam nearly up to your ass. 
“Fuck's sake Eddie! What the hell am I gonna do!” 
Hands shaking, you clench your jaw in panic, trying to frantically come up with a way to rectify it. Eddie holds his hands up to you as if he were approaching a wild animal. 
“Just calm down princess, it's only a skirt.” 
Pouting, you hit him on the arm. 
“It's not just a skirt! I can't work like this, how can I go home and change, I won't be able to fix it and-” 
Eddie smiles and holds one of your hands. 
“It's gonna be OK, we can sort something out. You seriously need to chill, have a big O or something.” He chuckles, clearly meaning for it to be a joke, but it's hitting too close to home. 
It's never happened for you. You've kissed guys, sure, but whenever they reach into your pants, it's either uncomfortable or downright painful. Even your own desperate fumblings haven't got you there. Most of the time you just feel stupid and awkward trying to touch yourself. So, you'd given up, thinking you're broken. That it'll never happen for you. 
Tears well immediately in your eyes. He knows he fucked up, it's written all over his face. As he opens his mouth to speak you rip your hand from his grasp and run to the restroom sobbing. 
It's stupid, it's so stupid. You know that, but the tears won't stop falling, face hot and scrunched as you sit on the closed toilet seat with your head in your hands. Your breath is heavy, gulping and wet; you dimly wonder if you can just stay here until the shop closes.
There's a gentle knock on the door. 
“Sweetheart, can I come in?” It's Eddie, voice softer than you've ever heard it. 
“Go away” you manage. It's shaky and pathetic sounding, but it's out there. 
“I'm not going anywhere. Talk to me, you'll feel better, I promise.” 
He tries the door, turning the handle before you get a chance to lock it. Jumping upright, you go to push him away but he grabs your wrist and pulls you into him. His embrace takes away that edge and pretty soon you're just sobbing into his chest. 
As he strokes the back of your head, he makes shushing noises, his other arm wrapped tight around your shoulders. You're not sure how long you stay like that, in the warmth of his hold, his body pressed against yours. The tenderness calms you down until your tears stop, but he doesn't pull away. 
After a while, he whispers, “feel a little better?” 
“Y-yeah,” you say, voice returning to itself. 
Only then does he release you, rubbing a thumb under your eye to wipe moisture away. 
“I didn't mean to hurt you. You wanna go somewhere and talk about it?” 
“I- I've never- I don't talk about- I-” you shake your head as if to clear it. A part of you wants to hit him, to shout at him, but his gaze is so concerned that you agree. Your shoulders slump, losing a bit of tension. “OK.” 
Smiling at you, he whips his flannel shirt off, leaving him in a white vest, and ties it around your waist. 
“For your modesty. Come with me.” 
Puzzled, you follow him out of the bathroom and back into the shop where Mac is sitting looking worried. 
“What's going-” 
Eddie interrupts, “emergency late lunch needed, alright? Can you cancel my 3 o clock?” 
Mac seems confused, but looks at Eddie's earnest face, and your emotional one, and nods. 
“Not a problem.” 
“Thanks, man.” 
Before you can ask where you're going, he pulls you from the shop by the arm and across the street into a dimly lit bar, depositing you in the nearest booth. 
“I'll be right back.” 
If he's uncomfortable by his appearance, he doesn't show it. The way he strides up to the bar, it's as if he owns the place. It's remarkable, the sheer confidence he embodies like a second skin. 
“Hey, John!” He hollers, knuckles knocking on the wood of the bar. 
John appears, a gruff, stocky guy with a buzz cut and a sour face. 
“What the fuck are you doing here.” 
“Oh come on, you know you missed me.” 
John's face screws into something akin to a smile. “What do you want, you little shit.” 
“I love it when you talk dirty,” Eddie grins and winks, “two beers please.” 
A grunt and a nod, and John puts the beers down on the bar. As Eddie reaches for his wallet John waves a hand in dismissal. 
“Put that away boy, your money ain't good here. Besides, your lady friend looks like she needs it.” 
You flush and tear your eyes away, embarrassed. Eddie walks back over and puts a beer in front of you. 
“Eddie, we're still working I-” 
“It's one beer. It's alright.” 
You shrug and take a sip, nodding at the bartender, “he knows I'm upset, do I look a mess?” 
Shaking his head so hard it releases some of his wayward waves from their confines, he tips his beer at you, before he takes a long chug. 
“No,” he says enthusiastically, “you look just as pretty as you always do.” 
Scoffing, you turn your eyes downward. Eddie ignores your response, instead pressing on what happened earlier. 
“Sorry again,” he says, sounding genuinely distressed, "I don't want to see anyone hurt from something I said, least of all you.” 
Meeting his gaze, you smile incredulously. “Oh? And why me?” 
“Come on, don't make me say it.” 
Staring at him, you fold your arms in an act of defiance. He rolls his eyes and looks at you. 
“I like you. You're uptight, and mean to me, and a little conceited, but I like you. I don't want you to hurt. Can we just be friends? I'm a pretty good listener, you know? I can help.” 
Heat floods your insides. Eyes scanning him for any sign of a joke, you come up empty. 
‘I'm not conceited,” you counter weakly, clinging on to the familiar push and pull. 
“And I'm the Easter bunny.” 
Giggling, you take another sip of beer. 
“Come on, friends? Talk to me.” 
Sighing deeply, you fix your gaze at the table, forefinger tracing patterns in the condensation from your drink. “Promise not to laugh?” 
“I promise.” 
You can't tell how genuine he's being, as you don't dare look at his face, nerves controlling your every limb. His voice seems honest enough. 
“I- I have a problem, something I can't physically do. You reminded me of it. It's not your fault.” Shrugging in an attempt to make this look less serious than it is for you, you take a pull out of your beer bottle once more.
“Wait, are you saying…” he chuckles a little in disbelief, “have you never… had an orgasm before?” 
“Eddie, be quiet!” You urgently whisper, looking around the bar. 
“No one's listening sweetheart, no spies in here,” he says in a low tone, hand reaching out to grasp yours. Your first instinct is to shake his hand away but he holds firm, rough fingertips rubbing against your knuckles. 
“Eddie, I'm broken,” you whimper, voice breaking, “I can't do it.” 
“Oh sweetheart,” he responds, chock full of emotion, “you're not broken. You are perfect.” 
Pulling your hand away, you keep your eyes away from his, unwilling to meet that burning gaze of his. Unwilling to lose yourself in those sultry dark eyes. 
“I can't do it. Anytime some guy tries, it hurts. I've given up to be honest. I just wasn't made for it.” 
He laughs again, dragging his hand over his face. 
“Fuck, sweetheart, the problem ain't you. Have you- have you tried, fixing it, on your own?” The last part is a whisper, you assume to protect your feelings. 
“Yeah, but I just feel stupid and awkward. I don't know.” 
There's a little silence between you as you both dwell in the suffocating fog of your confession, neither of you willing to clear it. 
“Listen, this may be way out of your comfort zone, but I'm saying it anyway. If you don't like it, we'll forget it, and I won't mention it again.” 
Finally looking at him, at the vulnerability on his face, you nod, not trusting your voice. 
“I can… maybe I can help you. Show you you're not broken? As a favour between friends.” 
You laugh mirthlessly and finish your beer. “That's a little more than a favour, Eddie.” 
“We can keep it professional.” 
You stare at him wide eyed. His messy hair and dark glittering eyes. At the way he slumps in his seat like a king or a delinquent, you can't decide which. At his taunt frame, the tattoos spackling every available inch of his skin. Your eyebrows raise of their own accord. 
“Professional? You?” 
“Yeah, me! I can do it, you know. I could make you come.” 
A shiver forces its merry way down your spine at his words. 
“You're really confident.” 
“You haven't seen what I can do.” 
Blushing hard, you attempt to control yourself. “Look, if we're going to do this, I need you to promise some things.” 
“Ah, of course, you would have rules,” he grins, as he leans back and spreads in his seat, “continue.” 
Searching your mind for a moment, you try to glean what you need. 
“First of all, we need to be discreet, and professional at all times, clear?” 
“As crystal,” he grins wolfishly, “anything else?” 
“Yeah- I think,” you wrack your brains, trying to come up with something that would make this less intimate. Anything. But the roguish nature of his presence makes it hard to even think of a thing. Finally, your eyes widen at the idea that suddenly crosses your mind. 
“Final rule. No kissing.” 
He pouts, looking at your chest and back up, “no kissing anywhere?” 
“N-no, no kissing on the mouth.” 
Grin returning, he winks at you, a gesture that flips your stomach inside out. 
“Kinky. Alright, deal,” he leans forward to give his hand to yours. A hand covered in ink and calluses. Roughness and tenderness. 
You shake it.
********************
For the next couple of days, your little arrangement isn't brought up. A wild thought hammers itself into your mind; either he wasn't serious, or you imagined it. 
Those theories are put to bed on day three. 
After you let Mac know about the flyers and the bonus poster you designed, you sit back and enjoy the praise given to you. It's funny, the feeling of being told a job has been well done makes you happier than you care to admit.
Eddie turns up at the counter, whistling through his teeth. “Sweet looking flyers, how'd you swing those?” 
“I designed them. I've got a degree in design and marketing, if you didn't know,” you sniff, rearranging the stationary on the counter to avoid his eyes. 
“Maybe you could help me design some for my band. These look pretty metal.” He says, picking one up and looking at it closely. 
“Maybe.” 
Eddie leans in close, so close you feel the warmth of his breath on your cheek. 
“If you're still up for our arrangement, I'm free tonight.” 
Heat immediately flushes your face. Ignoring him entirely, you write your address and a time on a notepad, and thrust the paper into his hands. 
“Covert, I like it. See you then princess.” 
By the time 9pm rolls around you're a jittery mass of nerves, having changed clothes no less than four times, tidied your apartment, changed the bedsheets and paced so much you're surprised there's not a groove in the floorboards. 
In the end you'd decided on a baggy band t-shirt and your sleep shorts. It was a rational calculation to make Eddie think you're just wearing what you usually would at home and therefore show you're not nervous. I mean, you are wearing what you'd usually wear at home. He didn't need to know about how long it took you to reach that decision. 
The sound of the intercom buzzing sends your pulse into overdrive. Pressing the button, you let out a strangled “Hello?” 
“Hey princess.” 
“Come on up.” 
Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck…
A soft knock at the door and you count to five, trying to remember how to breathe. When you open the door, you're stunned. He's leaning on the doorframe in a fucking button up shirt. It's black, and clings to him deliciously. His hair looks a little damp, loose around his shoulders, and his aftershave is making you feel dizzy. 
“Oh, you didn't need- I mean-” you point at his shirt, and he looks down and chuckles. 
“Just came from band practice. Took a shower, and this was clean,” he shrugs and shoulders into your apartment. “Nice place. Where's all your stuff?” 
You look around at your sparse apartment. Everything in order, down to the fresh flowers on your tiny dining table. 
“This is all my stuff,” you say, confused, “I don't like clutter.” 
He chuckles, walking over to you. “No wonder I annoy you. I am clutter.” 
He's close now, close enough so that you have to look up to see his face. His rough fingers ghost your arm, sending a wave of goosebumps over your skin. 
“Nice seeing you in something casual. L7, right?” He asks, pointing at the t-shirt. 
“Yeah, you know who they are?” 
“I'm surprised you do. Thought you'd be a Mariah Carey kinda girl.” 
You scrunch your face in distaste. “No, not at all. You don't know everything about me.” 
He leans in, warm breath a whisper in your ear. “I know some things about you.” 
Squirming hotly, you lead him to your room before you lose your nerve. 
“So, the princess's bedchamber. It's nice,” he remarks, flopping down on the bed as if it were his own. 
“Take your boots off,” you snip, folding your arms. 
“Ah, there she is.” He smiles, but does as instructed. Once more he's laying back into your scattered pillows looking perfectly at ease. You, on the other hand, stand there, spine a vertical rod as you stare back at him. 
 “Come on then, sit down.” 
Nervously you sit at the foot of the bed with your legs crossed. 
“Now princess, what do you do when you touch yourself?” 
Blushing furiously, you stammer out, “what, do you expect me to like, show you?” 
He chuckles, diffusing some of the tension. “As much as I'd like that, I don't think you're ready for that kinda shit. Just tell me, what's your thought process?” 
Staring at him for a little too long, you open your mouth and close it again. He rolls his eyes. 
“Look, if you want me to help I'll help, but you gotta give me something here.” He looks as if he's about to get up and leave; your arm shoots out on its own accord, grabbing his leg to stop him. 
“Sorry, sorry. I just, I've never spoken about this kinda stuff. I don't know about any process, I just… reach down and fiddle around?” You blush even more. 
“So you don't like, watch anything? Or read anything?” He looks a little amused.
“What on earth are you talking about?” 
“Porn, sweetheart.” 
It's so blunt that you jump a little. “Oh no, I've never, oh no no.” 
“Christ,” he whispers, “right, you can like, set the mood. Look at something to turn you on? It'd probably help you feel less awkward.” 
“Oh. Right.” 
“And do you ever just like, slouch? I feel like I'm back at school looking at ya.” 
“Huh?” 
“Just, come here.” He pats the little space between his spread legs and you hesitate for a second before you crawl over to him. 
“How do you want me to sit, like cross legged or-” 
He grabs your hips and spins you, forcing your back into his crotch.
“Stop trying to control every little thing,” he says in a hard tone, one you're too embarrassed to admit makes your insides tingle. Softer, he continues. “Look, if you're ever gonna get there you need to relax, stop trying to control it, and stop overthinking.” 
“Great, all of the things I'm shit at.” 
His laugh is loud, it vibrates into your spine. “I'll help you, OK? You trust me?” 
“In a very limited sense of the word, yeah.” 
“Lemme rephrase. You still OK to do this?” 
“Yeah.”
“Good. Just relax.” 
You're not sure what you are expecting, but it certainly isn't his hands winding into your hair, fingertips rubbing softly at your scalp. It shoots tingles down your spine, your entire head feeling fuzzy and warm. 
You stifle a whimper, biting your lip. His fingers stop. 
“If you want to make noises, you can. Tells me I'm doing a good job. That goes for everything else too, alright?” 
“Alright.” You whisper. 
“You comfortable?” 
“Yeah it's just- well-”
“Tell me.” 
“I think it's your shirt buttons, they're digging into my back a bit,” you admit, feeling the sharp points down your spine. 
“Easily fixed.” He taps your arm and you lean forward. Some rustling, and he throws his shirt to the foot of your bed. 
“Now just chill sweetheart.” 
His fingers begin rubbing at you again, thumbs sinking low to pop at the bubbles in your neck. 
“Fuck, that's really nice.” 
He hums appreciatively, working his hands lower and dropping them to your shoulders. The massaging continues, and you feel yourself melting, your body moulding into his. Your legs, once ramrod straight, have bent a little and parted of their own accord, the muscles loosening. Even your breathing has slowed. 
“That's better, atta girl,” he says and you whine at the words, a little pathetic mewling sound that tumbles past your lips.
“Oh, you like that, don't you?” The smile is evident in his voice, a smug tone smeared liberally across each word. 
“You, you're so-” you begin, but his hand drags across the front of your shirt, just over the tops of your breasts.
“I'm so what?” He whispers in your ear.
“So, so arrogant,” you huff. He laughs, a husky chuckle, and dances the tips of his fingers over your clothed nipple. Gasping, you grasp at his thighs either side of you.
“Yeah? What else am I?” He says, nibbling at your earlobe. 
“You- you're cocky, and- and self assured- Oh God!” 
Rudely interrupted by him tweaking your nipple between his thumb and forefinger, you swear, back arching off of him for a moment. 
“You know,” he says in a gravelly tone directly in your ear, “those are pretty much the same thing.” 
“You drive me crazy,” you huff, squirming a little against him as his hands explore your chest over your shirt.
“Good crazy or bad crazy?” He smiles, then bites softly at your neck. 
“I- I haven't decided yet.” 
“Good. I can say the same about you,” he admits, his hands trailing lower, pulling your shirt up so he can stroke at your bare sides. The touch of fingertips on your skin sends a river of sensations through you that run deep into your core. 
“Are you going to- what are you doing, exactly?” You breathe, starting to move against him. 
“I'm warming you up sweetheart. Why, don't you like it?” 
Genuinely curious, you try to ask what you want to know without using the words. 
 “N- no, I do. Do you have to, erm, get warmed up? When you, you know.” 
He lets out a little huff of a laugh. “Guys are a little less… complicated, than girls. For the most part.” 
“Oh. OK, so you can just. I mean, you just, get excited?” Your breathing becomes more ragged when the tip of his thumb grazes the underside of your breast. 
“Sweetheart, I got hard seeing you in these little shorts.” Running a finger down your stomach, he lightly pings the elastic of your sleep shorts as if to accentuate his point. 
“Really?” 
There's no denying it when he moves his hips up and you feel his solid bulge press into the small of your back. 
“Really. Can I take this off?” He asks, twisting the hem of your shirt in one hand. 
“Yeah.” It's a whisper. You're a little scared of being bare chested, but not having to see his face helps. Plus, he's wound you up so much you're on the verge of begging for his touches, pleading for more. 
He guides your top up, up, up, revealing you slowly. Coaxing it over your head, you move your arms up so he can remove it. It ends up in a heap on top of his shirt. One tattooed arm wraps around your waist, pulling you toward him more, his hardness pushing against your ass. 
His breathing is unsteady as he grinds his hips, pushing onto you further. Gasping, your fingers are vices, firmly attached to his thighs in a vain attempt to anchor you. 
Suddenly his hand is winding into your hair, tugging your head aside so he can run a fat tongue across your neck. You shudder at the sensation, feeling the hard ball of his tongue piercing against your throat When he takes his pillowy lips and sucks at the spot between your neck and shoulder a moan slips out. Grunting in approval, his hands are on your bare tits, fingers pinching at your hardened nipples. 
“Holy hell!” 
He laughs, running rough fingers down your body, circling your new ink, then dipping down past your waistband. Those tattooed fingers barely brush your pubic hair, teasing you, then glide back up to your stomach. 
“Eddie, please.” 
Your voice is small, not your own. Eddie groans low in your ear, rubbing his length into the fat of your ass.
“Fuck, princess, I like you saying my name like that. You want me to touch you right here?” he says, pressing down hard over your clothed clit. 
The sheer relief of having his touch where you need it gets you close to tears; a gulping shudder of a sob rips from deep in your chest. 
“See, you're not broken, sweetheart. Can I take these off?” 
Shaking, you hook your fingers into your sleep shorts and pull them down your legs, air hitting your most intimate area. Eddie huffs in your ear, his inked hands rubbing up the insides of your thighs. 
“You're so fuckin’ sexy.”
Before you can retort, his fingers dip down to your entrance, gathering your slick. You can hear how wet you are, but it's not in you to think about it. You can't think, only feel. 
When his fingers run up and start rubbing circles into your clit, your response is visceral. Bucking up, you chase the feeling, searching for even more. 
“I'm gonna slip a finger in, alright princess?” 
You nod, waiting for the pain, wincing before it even starts.
“It's OK, you're fine, you gotta relax baby.” He strokes your stomach with his free hand, pressing kisses to your temple. 
The tip of his finger breaches you, and the pain doesn't come. Your soaking wet cunt invites him in, warm and pulsing with arousal. He slips it into the hilt, his palm pressing into your clit, and your moan is long and loud. It's never felt like this. Never has it stoked a fire in your gut, bubbled your insides like pop rocks and Coke, turned you into a writhing mess. 
He fucks his finger into you, slipping a second in to join the first, and you move your hips, chasing the building tightness in your belly. Each thrust of his hand has you bucking, and in turn rubbing against his member trapped within its denim prison. 
“That's it, good fuckin’ girl.” His voice is strained, as if he's trying hard not to lose control. 
“Eddie, oh fuck, f-feels so- good, yes, please, please-” 
You're not sure what you're begging for, and Eddie doesn't seem to be in any state to ask, but it doesn't matter. His fingers fuck into you in earnest, stroking hard against some spot inside that has you babbling and quivering around him. 
“God, you're so tight, this little cunts gonna drive me crazy. So wet and perfect, Jesus Christ.”
The feeling seems too much and not enough, and it grows higher and higher, flooding your body with a pleasure so intense you're sure you black out. The only thing you're aware of is your voice screaming out his name as your body thrusts wildly into his grip. Finally, it dissipates, your body melting against his form, sweating and spent. 
You take a breath, and another, trying to gather your wits enough to speak. Eddie speaks first.
“So sweetheart, everything you dreamed it would be?” He asks as he strokes your hair. 
“Better. Fuck, Eddie. Thank you.” 
“Anytime. Seriously. Any. Time. Day, night, weekends, holidays-” 
You giggle, slapping his thigh, and sit up, grabbing your discarded shirt to cover up. 
“Sorry, that was probably a little er, frustrating for you.” You say as you glance at his bare torso, drinking in the sight with your eyes for the first time. He's lean, but ripped, a faint sheen of sweating making his tattoos glisten in the low light. 
“What do you mean sweetheart?” 
“Well, doing that, not getting anything in return...” 
He chuckles lightly, “Oh I wouldn't say that,” he glances down, gesturing to his jeans, “full disclosure, I came in my pants.” 
“Really?” your eyes widen, staring at him with disbelief. 
“I ain't lying. Wanna check?” He waggles his eyebrows at you, making you laugh again. 
“You seem better already. Right, I better go.” 
Shoulders deflating, you pout, “I suppose you better.” 
“Hey don't look at me like that. I hoped that helped. Sleep tight, drink some water. I'll see you tomorrow princess.” 
And just like that, he leaves. Of course he leaves, it was just a deal you struck, nothing more. A favour. you wipe stray tears from your eyes and try not to focus on the sound of the front door shutting. 
As you collapse on the bed, exhausted, you think about his hands, his words. There's something screaming inside, telling you you're playing with fire, but as you drift off you can't find it in you to mind.
Taglist
@liminalpebble @eddies-puppet @rip-quizilla @micheledawn1975 @vanilla-demon @millercontracting @roanniom @josephquinnsfreckles @leelei1980 @mrsjellymunson @usedtobecooler @eddiesprincess86 @ali-r3n @choke-me-eddie @littlebebebunny @big-ope-vibes
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hoshigray · 8 months ago
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Hey, can I request some Toji, please? 👉🏻👈🏻 having sex with him after an argument and silent treatment for several days, but not like wild fucking, but kinda intimate and passionate 😔 like imagine you finally make up after an argument and he missed you soooo much and he want to kiss everywhere, look you in the eyes and praise the hell out of you 🥺
Damn, I need soft Toji bad 😭 wish you a great day 🫶🏻
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𝐚. 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: arguing!? make up sex!?!? with soft dom toji!!??? ahhhhhhh—
⊹ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: soft dom! Toji x fem! reader - explicit content; minors DNI - implied argument + make-up sex - kissing/making out - Daddy kink - oral (m! + f! receiving) - fingering (f! receiving) - breast fondling + nipple play - anvil/mating press + spooning positions - cockwarming - praise - unprotected sex - multiple orgasms - pet names (baby, good girl, mama, sweet baby, sweetie) - Toji being whipped + missing you, i'm so soft - itty bitty angst in beginning + fluff on SMUT on fluff - mention os spit/drool.
⊹ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2.9k
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Toji didn’t like having arguments with you. They made you distant from him, pushed him away, and he’ll feel like utter shit until things subside after kissing and making up. And when the tension between you lasts for an entire week? Oh, that makes him experience a new gut-wrenching definition of guilt. 
Avoiding him is a torture he doesn’t want from you — oh, he can’t stand it. When you use the shower in the morning after he uses it in the nighttime, when your eyes don’t acknowledge his existence, or when you sleep far into your side of the bed with your back to him while he’s in a state of unease trying to find sleep without your warmth on him. 
A whole week of nothing but side glances and avoiding being in the same place as him, especially in your shared apartment. With every passing day, the pressure growing felt like you two were drifting apart — something Toji would never want between you. He already lost one love of his life; the mere thought of losing another was strong enough to have his stomach drop. 
It drives him so fucking crazy, especially when you’re in the kitchen washing dishes, Megumi and Tsumiki are at a sleepover, and him on the living room couch, supposedly watching sports highlights. But he can’t; his thoughts are too occupied reflecting on you — missing you. God, did he miss you — so fucking much that he shuts the television off and walks to the kitchen with a purpose. 
He brings you in with an embrace, spooking the daylights out of you that you almost jumped. You thank your stars you were done washing the dishes by the time he came around, or else he’d give you another thing to be mad about. “J-Jesus, Toji…! Scaring me like that, what are you—“
“I’m sorry.”
Two words — that’s all it takes to silence you, and your body stiffens in his hold. Toji takes this time to indulge in having you in his arms after such a break, his fingers sinking into the flesh of your abdomen and his face buried in the crook of your neck. The way your breath hitches at his lips on your shoulder, he kisses the skin exposed from your tank top. Fuck, you make him go insane.
“I don’t want us like this, baby,” he proceeds, sighing deeply when his hand creeps to your wet one to grasp. “Pushin’ you away from me like this, it’s drivin’ me crazy. Don’t avoid me because of dumb shit I did or said.” You were listening intently; the TV was off, so there’s no way you’d be ignorant enough to close him off. But you didn’t say anything yet, making the raven-haired man keep going. “This silent treatment, it’s fuckin’ with me; sleepin’ far on one side with y’r back to me, taking showers at different times, and not looking at me in the eye…” A kiss to the neck has you breathing cautiously. “Makes me think I’m losin’ you, and I don’t want that. So….I’m sorry.”
He can’t lie; the stillness between you two has him anxious, barely keeping it together and fighting the quiver of his fingers from showing. He nearly misses your signal — slapping his forearm wrapped around your stomach. Toji loosens his hold on you, and you turn around to face him. It feels like it’s been forever since the last time your eyes were on his for more than a second, and he freezes at the touch of your hands cupping his face.
“You’d never lose me, Toji,” you say to him in a whisper so the world doesn’t intervene with this moment. You bring your face to him to kiss the scar on his lip and return the hug. “And I’m sorry, too.”
There’s hesitance when he circles his arms around your waist again, but your frame on him gradually puts him at ease. “Sorry ‘bout what?” 
You peer up at him with your chin on his chest. Goddamn, your beauty was unreal. “For not apologizing sooner.” 
Toji hums with an aimless nod. “So,” he brings a hand to cup your cheek, and you lean to his touch. “Are we cool?” You nod with a smile. “Good.”
You repeat. “Good.”
A few seconds go by when his viridian orbs are locked in with yours before his face draws in close. “I missed you…”
Your eyes instinctively close. “I miss—Mmm.”
Your sentence is cut off at the contact of his lips on yours, asking for permission by laying himself onto you more and licking your bottom lip. With your hands enveloping his neck, you open your mouth to receive him. A moan slips out when he pushes his tongue gently, the hand on your cheek coming around to hold you by the back of your head. 
The kiss gets hot and steamier with every peck, the hand on your waist slithering down to grope your ass hiding inside your leggings. You wail as your frame hits the sink, and Toji uses this to cage you into him. A strong leg comes in between yours, having you essentially ride him as you lovingly suck his tongue. And it gets intense when he slams his face to yours, taking in your sweet noises that poke him to make more. 
Sounds of lips smacking together fill the kitchen space, and your hands find their way inside his sweatshirt to roam over his back. And Toji loves your touch on him; how he yearned to feel your fingers on his skin again.  
Oxygen is needed to carry on, so he breaks the kiss for you both to breathe. Heavy pants are shared at the union of your foreheads pressing together. You huff prettily with hooded eyes up to him, unveiling a smile as your fingers play with the black strands on his nape.
“I missed you, too, Toji." You finally say to him, sealing the fate for what’s to happen into the night.
“Hahhh, fuck, keep suckin’ me like that, mama…Shit, I missed this.”
You two are now in the comfort of your shared bedroom, no longer acting like strangers in your bed. Hands and lips show no interest in being away from bodies; Toji, in particular, uses this time to get his calloused hands drunk on feeling your curves, dents, and skin. 
And you’re on the same boat, placing soft kisses on whatever place you can find. His lips, his clavicle, sneaking inside his sweatshirt to tweak and lick his nipples before trailing down to the dent of his sweats. Pulling the pants down sprung out his hard-on, and you feverishly greet his cock with your mouth. 
Toji gets lost in the sensation of your lips and tongue, gripping the sheets at his dick and being swallowed whole into your warm throat. Fuck, you were so good at this, using your hands to stroke him as you sucked his glans harshly while gingerly massaging his balls. Your humming on him feels so good that his hand goes to your head to steady himself. 
“Fucking Christ,” he curses under his breath, and his hips jerk to create friction. He wants to come so bad, stuff your face with his dick, and pump his load into you. But no, not right now. He taps your cheek, and you bat your eyes at him. “Mmm, c’mon, sweetie. Let’s switch.”
You take out his cock from your mouth and a string of saliva sticks to you and his cockhead. “But you didn’t—“
“Don’t worry; I will later,” he squishes your cheeks, wiping spit from the corners of your lips. And he means that because being one with you is what he wants more than anything tonight.
But before that, he needs to have you be prepared for him. After all, it has been a week.
“—Ahhhh, ahhhh, Tojiii, I just came…!”
“There you go, baby,” his baritone voice rocked to your core, his tongue licking and sucking the skin of your inner thigh. “Keep makin’ a mess for me...”
He nestled between your legs, his mouth stuffed in the proximity of your cunt that’s been orally stimulated for the past few minutes now. All for the sake of prep, yet Toji missed being close to your vagina like this, sucking your slick with ease.
Fuck, your taste in his buds was nearly nostalgic. It all felt familiar — felt right. His tongue swirled around your labia to make you whimper, shoving it inside your entrance to essentially fuck you on his tongue, resulting in pretty screams as you grab tuffs of raven hair. And since you just came, your legs trembled with sensitivity, trying to close your legs to shield yourself.
But that’s not what’s happening tonight, not with Toji. His hands easily hold your legs by the back of your knees, exposing your beautiful, soapy chaos of a chasm to him for him to enjoy. His face is so crowded between your legs and folds that his nose bumps and presses to the hood of your clit. You cry at his hold on you, forced to take whatever his tongue gives you.
“Moohhh, hooohh, To’jiiiii,” you’re shrieking when he laps on your clitoris, and your frame jolts from the onslaught. “Stooohhhpp! I can’t…!”
“Yes, you can,” he removes himself from your slit, licking your essence plastered on his scarred lips. Toji rests his head on the thigh where his hand is massaging. A low chortle leaves him when you shake your head, sneaking his free hand to your cunt where his middle and forefinger insert efficiently. You gasp sharply, and his thick digits go to work. “Don’t tell Daddy you can’t, sweet baby; I need you to be all wet for me.”
The title he uses on himself has your walls twitch on him. “Hahhh, I’m wet enough…Ohoo!!”
“Aht, aht, none of that,” he coos while pressing a thumb on your clit, and you wail at him as he makes circles on your bud. “Gotta have you all ready for me…” The squelches of his fingers exploring your insides are hot to hear. Fucking Christ, Toji couldn’t get enough of you, trying to fight the urge to plunge his mouth back on your cunt when you smell too good to resist. 
His eyes flickered back to your face when you shudder at the scrape of his blunt fingertips on your velvety texture. “D-Daddyyy, I’m gonna cummm…”
You make him snicker. “Yeah? You gonna cum?” He takes his tongue and runs an excruciatingly sluggish lick to your clit; it has you gripping the sheets. “Gonna make a mess on Daddy again, pretty thing?” You nod hastily with a chewed lip, fuck you looked so cute being desperate for him. He removes his finger with a deep sigh. “Mmm, ‘kay, stay still fr’ me, baby.”
You find that impossible as he descends back to your leaking slit to lick and suck like crazy, his hands on your hips to keep your writhing figure from escaping the older man sucking on your nectar. Christ, you tasted so good, his jaw wet from pushing his face further in to have more of you in his mouth as possible, chasing you to ride out another orgasm for him to drink on. 
He’d make you cum for the second time that night. Something you know is essential as you’re soon bent on your back, your legs to the air supported by his shoulders, and constant wails fly out your slippery lips and bounce the walls of your bedroom. You can only thank the Lord that the kids are not home right now…
“Hmaahh! Nhhaahh!! Daddyyyy, Daddyy….! Too much, I’m ‘oo full—Oooo!”
“Hghh! Hhhshiiiit, this pussy…! Try’na milk me dry, huh, sweet thing…”
Clothes have long been discarded to the bedroom floor, and the ceiling lights turned off for the natural lighting of the moon to shower the space, Toji’s nude, powerful body on top of yours as he pistons his cock into you at an irregular pace. Sweat keeps the strands of his bangs sticking to his forehead, and hoarse grunts evade him with every dig of his dick venturing inside you. 
The position helps him go deep into the places both you and he can’t reach, his fat girth stretching your entrance and the tip stimulating your G-spot with grazes to your vaginal walls. His jabs become more accurate when he adds his weight onto you, caging you between him and the mattress to have your chasm tighten around him more. You howl, clenching on his length at every scratch of your sensitive areas. And it doesn’t help the fact he drives himself down to the hilt, balls deep into your creamy cunt.
“Tahhh, ohhhh, good God,” your eyes shut, taking out the sense of seeing to indulge in the others. The many sensations coursing through your fatigued frame are borderline addicting — given the fact that this is the fourth time Toji’s making you come. You’re practically drowning in the scene; any more than this, you’re bound to turn into actual putty.
Toji taps your cheek to have you open your eyelids for him. “Hey, mama,” your heart skipped at his handsome, disheveled look. Emerald eyes capture your gaze, and the smirk on his face lifts the scar. “Watch how good y’re takin’ me.”
Your stare travels down to where your sex is joined with his, white fluids exiting out of you and making a ring around the base of his shaft. You can sense the come from the round prior trailing down to the crevice of your ass; so fucking dirty. It all looked so erotic and forbidden to the eyes, throbbing on him a lot more.
“Daddy, please—Mmmph!”
“What, sweetie,” his hips change to an intermittent rhythm, evoking more cries to escape your pretty lips. He examines every feature in your expression, admiring how sexy you look under his bow. “Tell Daddy what you want.”
It hurts to think, but you try to muster a response despite your head going through such a haze. “Let me c’mmm on you, pleaseee!”
“Good girl,” he stops moving his pelvis to maneuver, standing on his knees, removing your legs from his shoulder to lie them down. Toji then comes from behind you, scooping you to his side for your body to mush with his in for a cuddle. You gasp at him inserting his cock back in, humming at the stretch of his girth that fills you up and scrapes your upper wall.
Toji returns his pelvis in thrusting motions, and your head rests on his forearm. The push of his dick grinding against your velvety texture has you squeaking in high pitches, a hand finding purchase on his rocking hip. 
“Fuck,” he observes you, looking so effortlessly gorgeous by his side — he missed this so fucking bad, having you near him like it’s where you belonged. The hand you’re resting on comes around to cup your breast, fondling the mound lovingly, which makes you arch to him more. His free hand brings your chin to him, “So fuckin’ beautiful fr’ me, baby…”
The kiss makes you clamp onto him tighter, and Toji reacts by dialing the speed. He trails his lips to your cheek and the crook of your neck to lay more kisses and suck on your skin. The hand on your breast squeezes it, occasionally pressing down on your nipple with his forefinger. Yet it doesn’t distract you from the constant stimulation of your G-spot, screaming and toes curling from the diligent strokes against the wall of your vagina.
Your brain turns into mush, spit coming down your agape lips, and your brows furrow while Toji squishes your cheeks. “Ohhh, Daddy, right thereeee, I’m so close…!”
“Me too, sweetie, a lil’ bit more…—Aiishh!” He can feel it, his length pulsating inside you when your orgasms climb together. He brings your mouth back to his, taking your delicious screams when your bodies lock in together to climax. 
A few more harsh thrusts to your ass, and Toji spurts his load into you, sinking into the pleasurable sensation of your folds contracting around his girth. Your hand scratches his hip, muffled howls taken by him while the hand on your breast sneaks away to grasp your hand, fingers intertwining to seek connectedness. 
Quivering bodies soon calm down when the wave of their finish is finally gone, and you two sigh deep into a passionate kiss. It breaks with a soft noise while he nibbles on your lip before letting go. “Toji,” you said his name in stifles, your hand caressing his sweaty cheek.
The older man huffs, placing his hot palm on your cheek to stroke in return. “Yeah, mama?”
“Sleep,” you demanded with a sigh, fatigued eyes and trenched brows. The single word has you both chuckling in the hot air between you before he kisses you gently one last time. Exhaustion takes over you both, Toji bringing the comforter to put around your bodies, laying his head on the pillows as you rest yours on his arm, your hand still held with his.
His free hand guides you to be pressed up against him, his cock still inside your creamy cunt. He’s comforted by the snug of your walls and the flesh of your body molding with his hot, sturdy frame. Sleepy green eyes go to the creek of the curtains covering the bedroom window. “Maybe we outta argue more often.”
He knew that would make you giggle; the faint rise and fall of your shoulder is highlighted by the moonlight creeping through the window. “Good night, Toji.” The way you said his name sounded like a spell, closing his eyes at the somnolent tone.
“Night, baby.”
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requests/thirsts are open hehe~ 🧸
© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2024 – reblogs and comments are appreciated wholeheartedly ☆ header edit done by me + dividers by @/benkeibear.
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valleyofheartz · 8 months ago
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Beginning of the End
pairing: Suna Rintarou x F!Reader
angst to fluff
WC: 3.1k
synopsis: when Suna begins to spend more time with his close friends, including his new sickeningly sweet manager, you start to wonder if you’re not as important to him as you thought.
content/warnings: neglect, mentions of beating up (no one gets beat up), jealousy, insecurity, no use of y/n, lmk if i missed anything!
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you make your way towards the gymnasium with a giddy smile as you hum the lyrics to Apple Cider. it’s a boring Thursday afternoon, and while you had the option of going home immediately, you figured you’d stop by Rintarou’s volleyball practice. after all, you’d baked some brownies and thought it would be a fun surprise for the boys.
you peek your head through the door to ensure no volleyballs are going to attack you, before slipping in and running towards the benches. you notice Suna spot you with his intense stare, and you give him a smile paired with a wave in response. he waves back before focusing on the rest of his practice.
you manage to get some work done throughout the hour, not disturbing the team as you know how serious the sport is to them. by the time you’ve finished your homework, they’ve begun to pack up and head to the locker room.
Atsumu, however, wipes his sweat with a towel before walking towards you.
“Hey, [Name], how are ya doin'?” he asks you with a crooked grin.
you finish zipping up your backpack before looking up, “I’m doing okay! Just waiting for Rin.”
he nods understandingly as the rest of the boys walk out, dressed in fresh clothes and looking much less… stinky. Rintarou eyes you and Atsumu as he lazily stalks over, draping an arm over you and pulling you close.
he bends down and kisses your temple, “Hey, baby. What’re you doing here?”
you pause, looking up at him unsure as you are aware of the presence of his team members. “I was waiting for you. I was thinking we could go back home together and watch a movie?”
he lifts his arm to rub the back of his neck. “Sorry, today the team is going out for dinner. Maybe tomorrow?”
you ignore the pinch in your heart at the lack of an invitation, but you justify it as it is a team dinner. and make no mistake, no matter how close you were, you were not part of his team.
“Oh, okay.” you murmur with an awkward smile. you look towards Osamu who stands off to the side, “Hey, ‘Samu, I made my brownies again since you all loved them so much. Here.”
you reach out to give them to him as he rips open the lid and stares at it with heart-eyes. he looks back to you, “Thank ya so much [Name], ya sure ya don’t wanna dump Sunarin for me? I could eat these for the rest of ma life.”
Suna immediately wraps an arm around your waist, tugging you into his chest as he glowers at Osamu. you giggle as Osamu merely raises his hands in mock surrender. the rest of the team digs in, including Atsumu who you notice still hasn’t changed. but that was none of your business.
what was your business, was the pouty messy haired boy in front of you who looked like a sad puppy.
“Hey. Where’s mine?”
you smile fondly, before unzipping your backpack and pulling out a neatly wrapped bag of brownies. they were decorated with caramel drizzle and mini sprinkle hearts.
Suna lights up at the sight, gently grabbing it from your hand and kissing the side of your face. “Thanks.” he whispers, causing you to shiver at the low tone.
“Should you all be eating brownies when nationals is just around the corner? I thought you’d be more strict about this, Kita-san.” a gentle voice comes from behind. you look over and find their manager, Akira, as she frowns at the team.
Kita looks thoroughly scolded as he stares at the brownie in his hand, his cheeks puffed out as he stops chewing.
your brows furrow as you notice everyone stop eating. you force a smile, “I thought it would be fine since it’s been months since I gave it to them.”
Atsumu nods as he finishes chewing, licking his fingers once he’s done. “Yeah, don’t worry about it Akira, yer new so ya don’t know this, but [Name] always bakes for us. It doesn’t hurt to have somethin’ sweet once in a while.”
she sighs, a dimpled smile coming onto her face, “I suppose you’re right, Atsumu. Well, when are we leaving?”
your face drops at the we. who is we, you begin to wonder. the team? her? everyone here but you? you clench your fist as you inhale quietly. you turn to Suna with a smile.
“I’m gonna head home before it gets darker, have fun at your dinner.” you kiss his cheek before placing your bag over your shoulder and leaving, uncaring of the fact that your exit was not the nicest.
perhaps this was the beginning of the end of your and Suna’s relationship. looking back, you should’ve noticed something was wrong. but what were you to do, other than ride the catastrophic wave as a rookie surfer.
things began to go downhill from there. slowly, but surely, you were losing Rintarou. it went from team dinners, to team hangouts, to spending lunch breaks with the team. it was the team, team, team, and team. and a quick glance at Atsumu’s Instagram let you know that Akira was included in every team plan.
that didn’t mean you didn’t try. because if there’s anything you ever did, it was try your best.
“Hey, Rin! Let’s get dinner on Saturday?”
he looks at you with a guilty smile, kissing your lips gently. you part, dazed, but he lets you down with his next words. “Sorry, team dinner again. Maybe next week?”
-
“Rinnie, was thinking of seeing the new Barbie movie with you. Wanna go on Friday?” you ask with hopeful eyes. the Barbie movie was gaining so much popularity lately, it was hard to go about your days without seeing spoilers.
he pauses, before running a hand through his messy dark hair, “Sorry, babe. The team already asked me to go with them. I can rewatch it with you some other time though?”
“No need,” you shake your head with a wry smile.
“Have fun, Rin.”
you end up going to the theatres alone and shoving popcorn in your mouth every time the couples next to you giggle.
the last straw was when he flaked on your usual Thursday lunch break meetup. the two of you would sit on the rooftop together and enjoy picking at each others food. it would often end in you being cuddled into his chest, enjoying the soft kisses down your neck.
the past few weeks, he hadn’t been present at all. he was physically there, but his mind was somewhere else. he’d be on his phone texting the team group chat you were obviously not in, and it was getting ridiculous. so when he fails to show up this week, you begin to wonder how much more of this you’ll put up with.
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he doesn’t text you back for the rest of the day, and while you wish you could say you were angry, you were more so disappointed. was expecting him to prioritize you asking for too much? was it unreasonable to want to be chosen first? was love meant to hurt this much?
you make your way to the gymnasium once again after class. your face that once held a happy smile is replaced with a blank look, as you are unable to force yourself to look something you do not feel.
you walk in without a care of the volleyballs being thrown across the room, but you stop when you spot Akira, dimpled brown-haired Akira, who is in your Rintarou’s sweater. the sleeves fall below her hands, and the sweater paws look horrifically adorable. she smiles as she talks with the team, handing their water bottles to them. you wonder if you are imagining the glint in her eyes as she hands Rintarou his, their fingers brushing lightly as she gives it to him.
“[Name]!” a loud voice calls. it snaps you out of your daze, but you wish it hadn’t. tears begin to build in your eyes, so you turn around and walk out. you quickly wipe them away, thankful that your eyes don’t get red easily as you continue walking.
but then you hear footsteps. someone’s running towards you. you know it’s Rintarou, but you can’t face him right now. you speed up your steps, but he catches up with you in no time and softly grabs your wrist, pulling you into his chest.
you rip your arm out harshly, frowning up at him.
he exhales, out of breath from practice and running. “Baby, what’s wrong? Why did you leave?”
he pauses, “Why do you look so upset?”
he moves closer to grab your face in his hands, but you take a step back, needing the space.
“Why… Why was she in your sweater, Rintarou?”
he frowns, eyes looking around as his mind scrambles to understand you. “Who? You mean Akira? She wasn’t feeling well during lunch so I gave her my sweater.”
your heart drops. so while you were waiting for him alone at the rooftop he was with her? your face twists; you aren’t sure what kind of expression you’re showing, but it must annoy Suna, as he scoffs quietly, sliding a hand over his face.
“You’re not upset over that, are you? Because I don’t remember you being so possessive like that.”
you bark out a sarcastic laugh, looking at him as you tilt your head, “Possessive? More like I’m fucking normal, Rintarou. With the way you’ve been neglecting me lately, this is just the cherry on top.”
you shake your head, ignoring his concerned eyes. “Go back to practice, Suna. I’m going home.”
you turn around, fully expecting to be pulled back, but nothing happens. you continue to walk, letting out a shaky exhale as you place your headphones on. tears slip out of your eyes as your vision begins to blur. you blink harshly, wondering why every situation seemed to leave you utterly alone.
“She said something about Akira being in my sweater.” Suna dries his hair messily with the towel in his hands before leaving it draped on his neck.
Osamu shrugs, “Well, that’s a valid reason to be uncomfortable in my opinion.”
Aran nods in agreement beside him. “Yeah, you considered that maybe you pushed a boundary of hers?”
Suna frowns, trying to ignore the flashes in his head of your heartbroken face. his chest aches. he hates not being on good terms with you.
Atsumu comes out from the showers, stretching his arms as he yawns.
“How was yer lunch with her today? Did she seem upset earlier?”
Suna pauses at Atsumu’s words.
Lunch?
Today was…Thursday.
he stands, scrambling as he rummages through his bag for his phone. he quickly opens your contact and looks at your texts. he sighs with a heavy heart at what he sees. why didn’t he get your texts?
he checks to the settings, finding that he had your contact muted. he knows he could have never done that, so he traces his memory back to whoever had his phone. the only time he left his phone alone today was when he was with Akira in the nurses room.
putting the pieces together, he shuts off his phone and tosses it back into his bag.
“Fuck.”
-
Suna looks for you on Friday, but you manage to slip away every time he got close. he sat in your usual seat in class, only for you to sit up at the front close to the door. when class was over, you quickly packed your bags and was out before he could blink.
when he looked for you at lunch, he found you surrounded by your friends. you must’ve told them something, because the moment they saw him they glared before huddling closer to you as if to protect you. he rolls his eyes at the thought but is happy you have such caring friends.
he waits by your locker after school, crossing his arms and leaning on the cool metal. he has practice, but he has priorities. and perhaps he neglected you for the past three weeks, but he knows he can fix this. he can be better.
but when you don’t show up, he wonders what the point of being better is if you’re not there.
his eyes trace the lines in the concrete as he walks towards the gym. the rest of practice he’s off his game, with sloppy spikes and weak serves. sure, he gets told off by Kita but it’s not as bad as the pain of potentially losing you.
Akira walks up to him after practice. she taps his shoulder. “Hey, Suna. I was wondering if you wanted to visit the Illusion Cafe with me this weekend? I know you love sweets and I heard lots of good things!” she smiles sweetly, but all Suna can focus on is the sweater she is wearing. it’s his.
more importantly, it’s yours.
he frowns, “No. I’m gonna spend that time with my girlfriend.”
Akira’s expression drops into a slight scowl. his eyebrow twitches at the mere sight. why would she be angry that he’s spending time with his girlfriend?
“Oh…Okay. Let me know if you change your mind.” she says with a tight lipped smile.
he looks back at the sweater before glancing at her face. “I won’t. Also, I’d like my sweater back sometime soon, thanks.”
her face reddens at his comment. she nods, embarrassed, before scurrying away.
Suna sighs, walking to the locker room and wondering how he was gonna get you to talk to him.
-
the team walks out of the gym, with Suna tuning their mindless rambling out. he stretches, finding his eyes seem heavier than usual. he hadn’t slept well last night, unused to you being angry with him that it left him so unsettled he couldn’t sleep.
“Oh, looks like the basketball team is also going home.”
it’s something insignificant. something Suna thought he’d look over at and forget the next second. but then he sees you.
you, with your arm wrapped around another guy’s arm. he’s tall, taller than Suna. muscular too, and his dark blue hair is captivating. Suna stops walking, causing the rest of the team to take a second glance at what he is looking at.
“Holy shit, is that [Name]? What’s she doin’ with those scrubs?” he distantly hears Atsumu say, but all is on his mind is he needs to get you away from that guy now. away from him and into his arms.
you’re laughing, happy for the first time in three weeks until you hear the rushed footsteps that are approaching you.
“[Name], let’s talk.” Suna demands. unfortunately for him, you’re not in the mood to talk anymore.
you unwrap your arm, looking at Suna directly. “No thanks. Maybe next time.” you quote his favourite line he’d used on you countless times recently. it seems he realizes, as his face crumples.
“Who’s this dolt?” the tall blue haired man asks, and Suna’s eyebrow twitches in irritation. who does this guy think he is?
you sigh, “Sorry, Aomine. This is my…boyfriend.”
Aomine’s brows raise. “Ah, my bad. Didn’t mean to get in the way.”
you shake your head, ignoring the other basketball members who surround you. “You’re not in the way, let’s go home, please.”
Suna walks in front of you, stopping you from moving. you exhale, exhausted from the long three weeks and wanting nothing more than to be in your bed.
“You want me to deal with him, [Name]?” Kagami asks from the side, sliding his sleeves up as Suna’s eyes widen.
a new voice comes from behind Suna, “Deal with him? Yer gonna havta deal with us too then.” Atsumu stands in front of Suna, eyes blazing with confidence. even Kita stands off to the side, seemingly ready to physically intervene. you want to laugh at the scene.
you shake your head at the almost comedic situation in front of you, before clapping your hands loudly. “Okay! That’s enough. Volleyball kids, go on your way. Basketball kids, also go on your way. Suna and I will talk as he walks me home.”
Suna’s eyes light up at your words, but you ignore his gaze. he wasn’t forgiven quite yet.
the rest of them begin to make their way out of the school grounds, except for Suna and Aomine. Aomine looks down at you, bending to your height, “You sure you don’t need me to do anything?”
you smile at his overprotectiveness, “No thanks, I got this. Thank you though, really.” he smiles and ruffles your hair, letting out a small ‘oof’ as you hug him tightly.
Suna stands off to the side, silently seething yet knowing he has no place to tell you what to do, especially not now.
Aomine leaves soon after, with a soft wave and a promise to beat Suna up if he tries anything funny. you glance at Suna who looks unsure and out of place.
“Let’s go?” you don’t wait for an answer and begin walking. you hear soft shuffling as he walks beside you and takes small glances that he thinks are discreet.
you arrive at a park near your house. you take a seat on the swings, Suna carefully doing the same. you wait for him to speak, as you’re all out of love and words to give at the moment.
“So… I think- No I know, I need to start this off by saying I’m sorry.” he stands, moving to position himself in front of you. he bends down, crouching to meet your gaze.
“I was very neglectful these last few weeks. I have no excuse, and I know I’ve hurt you.”
he slowly moves to grab your hand; you allow him, as he brings your limp hand to kiss the back. “I want you to know I made it clear to Akira that you’re my number one. You’re the one I always want, no matter what. I can’t even believe my dumbass made you doubt that.”
he shakes your head, looking down before glancing up. you notice tears building in his lash-line, causing you to sit up in alarm.
“I am seriously so fucking sorry for missing our lunch dates, dinners, and for giving her my sweater.”
you grab his face gently, wiping your thumbs beneath his eyes.
“I’ll burn the sweater, I swear.”
you roll your eyes, squishing his cheeks gently.
he grabs your arms, kissing your inner wrists softly as he looks up at you. “Will you give me a second chance? I promise I won’t fumble.”
the sweet moment is broken, then, as you scoff out a laugh. “You’re not going to fumble me, Rintarou.”
he smiles, cat-like eyes with a lazy grin. “Damn right. Gotta treat you like the princess you are.”
you pout, “Not a queen?”
he laughs, a deep raspy sound. he stands up and tilts his head down to kiss your nose.
“Princess, queen, anything. So long as you’re mine.”
EXTRA:
"So, who was that asshole earlier?"
you shove his shoulder gently, "He's not an asshole! He's my friend. Didn't you know I'm friends with the basketball team? I used to be their manager."
Rintarou scoffs, "Yeah, I knew that, just didn't know those guys were so close to my girl."
you look at him with a blank face.
"Right, and I was the one who was possessive. Sure."
he whines softly, low in his throat as he moves his face into your neck, "I said I was sorry!"
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a/n: suna brainrot😵‍💫
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earthtooz · 1 year ago
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x : NOT JEALOUS ! :*+゚
in which: alhaitham isn't jealous, he doesn't get jealous, so what is this suffocating feeling in his chest that only happens when you're talking to another man that isn't him?
warnings: 5.4k words, jealous!alhaitham x gn!reader who has loads of rizz, university!au, fluff with angst but happy ending, pining!alhaitham who doesn't realise that he loves you, kaveh is there, mention of cyno, ooc at some bits?, swearing, alhaitham is a little bit of an asshole at some parts sawry. he's bad with feelings.
a/n: inspired by @danijaci's jealous jealous boy comic with alhaitham! hi dani if you're reading this pls don't perceive me... hides... but i hope you all like it :,)
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Alhaitham isn’t jealous. 
The uncomfortable feeling obstructing itself in his throat is just because he’s beginning to develop a sore throat- that’s all. It is flu season after all, who knows what kind of bacteria are in the air? Ones capable of lathing an uncomfortable oil that burns inside his chest, the smog crowding its way into his heart, sickening him to his core as Alhaitham can’t help but eavesdrop on the conversation happening beside him.
“I’m free friday,” a voice besides you confirms.
“Okay!” you cheer, sounding a little too happy for Alhaitham’s liking. After all, it’s 9 am, who has this much energy in the morning? “lets do Friday then!”
“Sounds good, I’ll see you then. Bye Y/n.”
“Bye, see you!” Alhaitham watches from the corner of his eye as you wave to the random stranger you’ve decided to associate yourself with before finally taking the seat beside him with a sigh. 
He doesn’t say anything to you, feeling your eyes glance at him expectantly as he stares stubbornly at the lecture board instead of acknowledging you or the jumble of feelings clogging up his diaphragm. 
“Hello, you,” You lean over slightly, careful to not invade his personal space whilst waving at him, hoping to catch his attention. He glances at you, nodding in greeting before returning to his book, the pages and rows of words only fuelling his unease he suddenly felt. He doesn’t even know where he left off, the book’s events a blur in Alhaitham’s mind.
How bothersome. What’s happening to him?
“Talkative today, aren’t you?” Your tone is playful despite his cold attitude and Alhaitham sneaks another look in your direction, noting the way your lips curve upwards. “So, how are you?” 
“I’m fine,” he murmurs, inserting a bookmark between the pages before slamming it shut, an indicator that you could keep conversing with him.
“Cool.” You tap your nails on the desks of the lecture hall. “Oh, I finished my essay the other day.”
“The one for your elective?”
You hum in agreement, “I hope I never get it back. Submitted it ten minutes before the due date.”
“You know you wouldn’t have been stressed over it if you just started it earlier-”
“I know, I know,” you huff, “spare your productivity lectures for another time, I’ll be needing them later in the semester.” The grey-haired shakes his head as you laugh, but his gaze returns to the front cover of his book as he solemnly thinks about the interaction you had with another man, right in front of him. 
(What right did he have to see you smiling so earnestly like that?)
“Who was that?” Alhaitham coughs out, barely choking down his pride in time to make space for the question.
You murmur some guy’s name that he doesn’t bother to remember. “He’s a friend of mine in the same discussion group for this course and we decided to do the assignment together. He bumped into me on the way in so we were just planning when to meet to do the research.”
“Oh.” Your answer doesn’t calm the churning in Alhaitham’s gut. Not even one bit, in fact, it makes it worse. 
But it’s not jealousy, Alhaitham doesn’t get jealous because he’s above petty feelings of inadequacy. He’s merely concerned for you, worried for your brainpower by the end of the project because your partner seems less-than-incompetent. If you’d picked someone like Alhaitham (or better yet, just picked Alhaitham), you would’ve aced the class without even blinking an eye. 
(The two of you are friends, so why didn’t you pick him? It’s literally been proven that the two of you are compatible working together since you were both executives of Sumeru’s Cultural Society, and amidst all of the activities the club has run, you’ve collaborated many times to make each event run flawlessly. So why not him? Why would you pick another man over him?)
“You know you could have picked me, I wouldn’t mind working on the assignment with you,” he grumbles, words soft but very clear.
Alhaitham misses the way your eyes widen in shock as apologies scramble out of your mouth. “I’m sorry! I automatically assumed that you wanted to work on it by yourself. Next time I’ll ask you.” 
The lecture begins before he could say anything in return and like a robot, he sets his thoughts aside and begins listening, notes document up and cursor blinking at the ready.
A mundane two hours pass by, one powerpoint slide after powerpoint slide before the lecture is finally over, much to your pleasure. Alhaitham notices the way you eagerly jump out of your seat to stretch, grabbing your bag. On the other hand, your grey-haired accomplice takes his time in packing up, forcing you to wait for him.
“Would you like to get some coffee before the meeting?” You ask.
“Sure, we can find a seat there and join it together,” he adds and you beam at him, expression bright and so enchanting that it makes him forget about all the perplexities he felt before the lecture. 
The two of you make your way to one of the many campus cafés where you practically wrestled Alhaitham to stop him from paying for both your orders (losing in the end) before sitting at a booth, your laptop set up with a pair of Alhaitham’s earphones shared between you. The meeting begins to fill up with almost all committee members, even Kaveh, who resides in his room of his and Alhaitham’s shared flat. Upon noticing him, you go to text him, with the grey-haired peeking over your shoulder from time to time to see your conversation- not that he cares that much.
(Perhaps if Kaveh glanced up from his phone, then he’d see how close Alhaitham had gotten with you, breaching the distance that he prefers to keep around others. He’d also notice the headphone sharing despite how he generally tends to keep them out of anyone else’s hands.)
You’re tasked with the role of taking notes for the meeting since Alhaitham, in your opinion, is not at all a reliable scribe. His notes tend to just include vital information and never what everyone else needs to know, yet each time you scold him for it, his unbothered expression never falters, waving your complaints off with a shrug. 
“Hey, Kaveh and I are going to go for lunch tomorrow after our classes. Care to join?” You ask, smiling at him hopefully as your messages with Kaveh sit open on your screen. Alhaitham doesn’t think twice before agreeing. 
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
“It looks like it’s about to rain,” you murmur, pulling out a chair as Alhaitham and Kaveh take their seats opposite you. 
“So it does,” Alhaitham notes, not caring to look too long out the window before returning his gaze to you. “You have an umbrella, right?”
“I, uh, didn’t think I needed one today.”
“Do you not check the weather before you leave?”
“Not everyone’s like you, Alhaitham.” Kaveh teases. “It’s no problem, Y/n, if it rains I can walk you back to your dorm.”
“Only if you are okay with it,” you insist, “I have no problem walking home in the rain. I love the rain.”
Alhaitham intervenes with a raise of his hand. “Nonsense, you’ll catch a cold. We’ll walk you home.”
A soft but genuine ‘thank you’ slips from your lips, neither of you wiser to the way Kaveh eyes his roommate suspiciously, not missing the use of ‘we’ in his sentence and the implications the collective pronoun has. For it meant that Alhaitham is willing to take precious time out of his day to perform an act for someone that he is not indebted to do. Not that Alhaitham is inherently selfish, per se, but he is a man of routine. He wakes up every morning and takes five minutes to scribble on his stupid whiteboard in the kitchen what he has to do for the day and strictly abides by it, not even straying two minutes off schedule.
Willingly volunteering his minutes? Kaveh finds that suspicious. 
“So, how’s your architecture assignment, Kaveh?” You ask, breaking the blond from his daze whilst Alhaitham pours glasses of water for the table, starting with your cup. 
“A nightmare,” he sighs, sinking into his chair. “I still have so much to do, you know my professor didn’t like my blueprint? How ridiculous! I hope that man steps in a puddle and wets his sock.”
The grey-haired pipes up with a remark. “I can’t wait for it to be done, our living room is a mess right now.” 
“Hey, I am the one that cleans that living room, thank you very much. Your bookshelf is still a mess even though I’ve asked you to clean it five times.”
“If it bothers you so much then why don’t you do it yourself?”
“I’m the only one who-”
“-I’m going to go to the bathroom,” you murmur, cutting the conversation before shuffling out of your chair, seemingly eager to do so.
Kaveh turns to the grey-haired again, “and you just scared away Y/n.”
“Sorry no one wants to hear about your architecture project.”
“Y/n literally asked, asshole.”
A rebuttal sits on the tip of Alhaitham’s tongue- as it always does when it comes to bickering with his roommate, but it dies out when an intruder comes to the table. “Excuse me, I hate to interrupt,” he begins, “but the person who just got up, is that your friend?”
“Yeah, why do you ask?”
“Oh, I just wanted to drop this off, mind passing it over for me?” The piece of paper he was holding lands in Kaveh’s hand. “Thanks, bro.” Is all he says before strolling away, out of sight but definitely not out of mind.
The blond does not hesitate to open it up, chuckling in amusement when reading the content. “’Hey you’re cute, here’s my number’ it says. What a bitch! You didn’t like his vibes either, right, Alhaitham?”
“Hold on, what does the note say?”
Grabbing (snatching) it from Kaveh, the grey-haired has half a mind to rip the note apart, a certain sense of distaste washing over him that intensifies the long he stares at the guy’s handwriting. His eye is twitching. Why is his eye twitching?
“Hey!” He hears Kaveh call. “Don’t scrunch it, that’s Y/n’s-“
Alhaitham stuffs the ball of paper into his bag where he’ll recycle it later even though something irrational within him tells him to burn it. “Y/n won’t miss it. You said it yourself, he’s a bitch.”
“Sure, but why are you doing-“
“Hey!” You interrupt, sliding back into your chair with a grin on your face. “So, what did I miss?”
“Nothing,” the grey-haired murmurs, assuming his crossed-arm position. Kaveh side eyes his roommate before agreeing with a hum. “Let’s order something now. We want to beat the rain, right?”
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
This meeting for the Sumeru Society might have been one of the most important ones of the year thus far, with almost every committee member expected to attend. After all, the annual ball was a big event that always had the largest turnout, and the amount of planning that goes into it to ensure its success is almost triple that of its other events.
So why weren’t you here?
“Why did you leave the meeting early on Friday?” Alhaitham asks as soon as he sees you.
You pause briefly, eyes widening and eyebrows raising. It must have been the way that Alhaitham’s voice raised a pitch towards the end of the question, demonstrating a nervous break in character that was not at all typical. Cool and collected would be the defining words to describe Alhaitham, as well as someone who does not care for the menial activities of others, so what is he doing asking you? And why does he care so much?
“I, uh, had dinner with someone,” you confess, continuing to grab your books and laptop, missing the way his features contort into something un-cool, and very un-Alhaitham.
“Whom?”
You murmur the name of some other guy, who he vaguely recalls to be your project partner.
“What?” Alhaitham snaps.
“I didn’t think missing out on some of the meeting would be a big deal! I got another committee member to explain what I missed,” you justified. “Besides, there’s no big events going on right now, so I thought-”
“-That you could abandon your tasks and go have fun with someone else?”
Alhaitham’s not really sure why he said that. He’s not angry that you skipped a meeting; there are larger things in the world to worry about, he’s angry because you spent time with another guy that wasn’t him.Why not go to dinner with him instead? He spends it every night with Kaveh, and you are far more favourable than Kaveh.  
“Is it really something to get mad over? I already told you, I got the meeting notes and everything-”
“-You’re an executive of the society, Y/n, more is expected from you.”
“Seriously?” you ask, “how come you didn’t bat an eye when the vice president wasn’t there the other day?”
“Because she was sick.” 
“Okay, fine! what about the subcommittee? they’re not always there either!” 
“They’re subcom. Whether they miss a meeting or not is not crucial.”
“So, it’s just my business that you care about?” You ask, eyebrows furrowed, disbelief clouding over your expression like a mask.
Again, Alhaitham doesn’t know where these punches are coming from and why he’s throwing them against you so viciously, but his heart is tightening defensively with a burning emotion that he’s been feeling more and more recently, and his first instinct is to lash out, to protect himself from it.
Perhaps it’s because foreign things that he can’t understand terrify him and you, all you ever do is make him feel things that he’s never felt before and he can’t understand why. 
“You’re not that special.”
A flash of hurt gleams in your eyes and Alhaitham knows now that he’s royally fucked up. “You’re an ass,” you grumble, about to walk away when he intercepts.
“Listen to me!”
“Fuck off!” 
“Y/n-”
You’re gone before he can get another word out, retreating figure stomping away whilst his chest weaves into knots; something that no amount of deep breathing can calm. It doesn’t help that the minute he returns home, Kaveh is onto him like some sort of parasite, curious over the tense air surrounding his normally-composed roommate. 
“Hey, welcome home- whoa, what’s gotten into you?” The blond asks.
“None of your business,” Alhaitham grumbles through gritted teeth, taking his shoes off and throwing them aside haphazardly. Kaveh doesn’t miss the way Alhaitham’s jaw is clenched, or the strain in his hand when he brings up a hand to run through his hair, or the very subtle and minute twitch in his cheek.
The blond ignores all signs that he wants to be left alone, and instead, follows the grey-haired to his room after he swung the door open. 
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on, let’s talk about this-”
“Talk about what?” Alhaitham growls.
“Who pissed in your black coffee today?” 
“No one. Now get lost.” 
“Aw, come on, you know what they say. Getting things off your chest is always beneficial.”
“There’s nothing on my chest, go away.”
“You sure? no stress, no deadlines, no love interest making you tear your hair out-”
“-No, no, none of those!”
“Then what?”
Alhaitham steadies himself by resting his elbows on his thighs, hands clasped together as he exhales loudly. “I got pissed and took it out on Y/n, who’s mad at me now.”
“Huh? Why so annoyed?”
“Because Y/n went to dinner with another man.”
It’s silent for a while. The sassy quip that he expects from Kaveh does not happen. Instead, the blond merely smiles, a satisfied, knowing grin that slightly irks him. “You know, I’ve been waiting for the day you realise you have feelings for Y/n.” 
“What? Where did you get that conclusion from?” Alhaitham sits up straighter. There are a lot of things he knows, and he knows for sure that he does not like you in any way beyond platonic. He doesn’t have any time to spare for love. There are scholarships he still needs to apply for, internships to be interviewed for, research projects to submit- nowhere amongst the minute hand of the clock is there space for love. 
“Oh come on,” Kaveh sits down on the bed beside his roommate, leaning back on his hands. “You’re not as smooth as you hope to be sometimes.”
“I’m serious, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Y’know the sooner you accept you have feelings for Y/n, the easier life will be.”
“Life is already easy and there is no sooner because I don’t like Y/n like that. Now get lost. I have stuff I need to finish.”
Kaveh shrugs, standing up with a soft ‘suit yourself’, taking seven steps before he’s out of the room. Alhaitham lets out a sigh that has lodged itself in his throat for too long, and the feeling of reprieve he gets is short-lived before he’s flooded with a certain tightness again. Maybe he did have a weight on his chest after all, not that he’d ever admit it to himself or Kaveh.
He gets up from his made bed with a grunt and decides to push aside all distractions. Time is unforgiving, and if doesn’t finish his assignment by this Friday then he’ll be a little less than pleased.
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
Alhaitham feels like he can’t breathe. 
You’re sitting alone at a library desk, all focused and concentrated on your laptop screen with your headphones on, blocking out any outside voice as you type away. He wonders if he should say hi, maybe try apologising for the way he acted last Monday- who is this guy that’s approaching you and why does he look so familiar? 
And why are you smiling so happily?
You beckon to the seat beside you and the guy readily complies, taking the chair beside you like he belonged there, like there weren’t other candidates that should be there instead (he’s not talking about himself. definitely not).
He hands you one of two coffee cups he’s holding. What kind of right does this guy have to give you a coffee? Does he even know your order?
He feels like a bit of creep keenly watching you interact with someone else from a balcony of the library, but the book and laptop in front of him lies forgotten, and in a rare moment of weakness, Alhaitham can’t find it in himself to return to his tasks, pursuit of knowledge momentarily forgotten. He can’t push aside the bile that threatens to rise, he can’t loosen his grip on the couch’s armrest, and he can’t blink for a second in fear of losing you from his sight.
(You’re laughing. Why are you laughing? How can you look so pretty laughing and why doesn’t he ever get to make you laugh like this?)
Alhaitham is losing his damn mind. So much so that the first thing he does when he sees you again is corner you. 
“You shouldn’t talk to that guy anymore.”
You’re backed against the brick walls of the time-worn building that your shared lecture always takes place in, and Alhaitham, spotting you like a hawk, put you in this precarious position as soon as the two hours were over. 
He can’t breathe. It’s been almost three weeks since you last spoke to him and you’re staring up at him like you’ve done nothing wrong, blinking once and twice at his uncharacteristic display of subtle aggression. 
“Who?” you mutter, shaking your head to try and grasp reality once again. you hug your laptop closer to your body. “What’s this about?”
“I said you shouldn’t talk to that guy anymore.” 
“What guy?” 
“Your project partner.”
“Really?” you mutter in disbelief.
He nods, teal eyes shining at you firmly. “Really. The project’s over, you don’t need to talk to him anymore.” 
“I don’t recall ever giving you the right to dictate who gets to be in my life or not, just like how you can’t tell me what to do with my time.” 
“I’m looking out for you, so stop trying to make me sound tyrannical.” 
Your mouth hangs open as you furrow your eyebrows, growing more and more frustrated with each second. So much for thinking that he wanted to resolve the awkwardness between the two of you. “I’m not even going to argue with you,” you murmur a quick ‘jerk’ under your breath before brushing past him. 
Alhaitham, however, is not willing to let you go as easily as you wish, quick to chase after you. Not that you go far anyways, turning around to face him again in the spaciousness of the vacant hallway. “Why do you care?” You ask, exasperated. “You’re Alhaitham, you don’t let trivial things like who I hangout with bother you, you’re cool and collected and rational, and I just don’t understand why you’re acting like this.”
He doesn’t understand either, not the erratic beating of his heart, the stubbornness of his mind, nor this undisputable urge to keep you all to himself. Is it normal to want to hide someone for selfish reasons?
Trailing off, Alhaitham is slightly humiliated that for the first time in his life, someone has witnessed him coming short of an answer. No logical conclusion, no explanation, not even a satisfying quip, just plain, suffocating silence.
“Right. When you do have an answer, let me know.” You walk away.
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
Your last rebuttal still weighs heavily on Alhaitham’s mind, even two days later as he and Kaveh are seated for a lecture in a shared course. His thoughts are scrambled like never before, the messiness of it all making him feel uneasy because for once, he doesn’t have an appropriate answer to a question.
Why was he acting like a temperamental teenager? What you did with your life was up to you, and indeed he has no right trying to change that. More importantly, why was it so hard to apologise for the stuff he said-
“So, how’s everything between you and Y/n?” 
Kaveh turns to him with widened eyes whilst Alhaitham’s poker face doesn’t move an inch, deceivingly apathetic.
“Good, we’ve been hanging out a lot more recently,” the other guy says, who Alhaitham quickly recognises to be your project partner and distaste rises in his stomach like bile. 
“Aye, good for you, man! So when are you going to ask Y/n out?”
“No way, bro, not yet. I’m such a wimp, but I hope I grow the balls to ask soon because I really like-”
“-looks like you got some competition!” The blond nudges Alhaitham, and if it were anyone else, they would not have glanced twice at the grey-haired who seemed unmoving and uninterested. However, Kaveh is not anyone else because he noticed the darkened look in Alhaitham’s eyes instantly, anger seeping into his composed gaze as his nose scrunches in disgust. 
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
“So, you and Alhaitham still aren’t talking?” Kaveh asks, leaning on the table of the restaurant with curious ears, hoping that he can grab some answers out of you as to why there was a stalemate between you and his roommate.
“Nope,” you sigh. 
“Why not?”
“I’m just-” you pinch the bridge of your nose, “I’m just waiting on an apology from him.”
“An apology? Why? What did he say?”
“He didn’t tell you?”
“You know how he is. Always insufferably secretive, so no, I don’t know anything that happened.” 
“Alhaitham just said some hurtful things to me, and he was being weird when I told him I was going to dinner with a friend of mine. Just kept being in my business.”
“Really?” The architecture student quirks a brow, confusion plastered on his face. “That’s not like Alhaitham at all.”
“I know, right? He kept trying to be like ‘don’t hang out with him’ and ridiculed me for not playing my part as an executive of the Sumeru society,” you complained, “like sorry I have other things I want to do.”
Kaveh nods in understanding as the conversation briefly stops when the waiter comes to drop off utensils at your table. As soon as they were gone, however, you begin again.
“And even though he was all up in my business, trying to tell me what not to do, he then said that I wasn’t special, which is so confusing because like-”
“-hold on. Alhaitham said that you weren’t special?” You nod at his parroted claim. “To him?” 
“Yeah. Stung like shit when he said that, especially since I thought we were friends but guess not,” you murmur sadly, fiddling with the fork.
Later that night, almost immediately after meeting you over dinner, Kaveh barges into his roommate’s room, not even changing out of his outside clothes. The sudden intrusion shocks Alhaitham who was busy typing on a document, textbook splayed open beneath him but momentarily forgotten as the blond takes a seat on the bed.
“What the- not even a hello?” The grey-haired asks, confused by this uncharacteristic silence of Kaveh’s. It’s pretty normal for the blond to barge into his room without notice, but it was not normal for him to be so quiet, practically brooding on the mattress. “Whatever. Where have you been? Have you eaten yet, because I made-”
“When will you just confess to Y/n?”
The mention of your name causes a spike in Alhaitham’s heartbeat and he swivels around instantly, attention fully directed towards his roommate. “Where is this coming from?”
“Y/n told me everything that happened between you two by the way-”
“-what, when?”
“Tonight, we just met for dinner.”
“And you didn’t tell me?”
“What would you have done if you knew? Showed up and made things worse?” He doesn’t say anything in retaliation, merely shutting his mouth and furrowing his eyebrows. “Why did you say that Y/n wasn’t special to you?” 
“I didn’t,” Alhaitham sighs, very loud and very perplexed. “I didn’t mean for it to come out the way it did.”
“Don’t you miss Y/n? You two used to hangout so often.”
“I do, of course I do!” He exclaims, burrowing his face in his hands. 
“So why aren’t you apologising?” 
“Because whenever I’m around Y/n, I’m not who I normally am,” he mutters, “especially everything whenever that project partner is around-”
“Jealous, much?”
“I’m not jealous.”
“Oh come on, you’re ridiculous. Stop pushing away your feelings and just be honest with yourself, Alhaitham! Y/n is not just a friend to you and you know it.”
“But, we are just friends-”
“So you mean to tell me that if I hung out with someone else- like if I hung out with Cyno, you would be pissed?”
“What? No, of course not.”
“Then why is it different with Y/n?” Once again, Alhaitham doesn’t have an answer to the question, sitting as still as a statue hunched over his desk. “Fine, I’ll spell it out to you. You like Y/n, more than just a friend!”
The silence leftover from Kaveh’s outburst is tense and full as the grey-haired lets the words sink in. 
“I’ll let you think about it,” the blond murmurs, voice softening dramatically as he stalks out of the room. Before he closes the door, however, he leaves a few final words. “Just- be honest with yourself, Alhaitham, and I wouldn’t delay trying to talk to Y/n.”
A sharp click rings through the room.
Alhaitham is no stranger to being alone, for who needs the company of others when you are happiest by yourself? Yet, in the weeks that you have not been speaking to him, a cardinal urge as been growing each and each day, wanting him to do something so atypical of him: to reach out and make the first move. Every passing day doesn’t lessen the thoughts that plague his mind, rather, they make him more and more impatient, because what if you get swept away by your project partner? 
(What if he’ll be too late? What if you won’t know of these powerful emotions that are steering through the storm in his heart? What if you won’t know just how badly he was been wanting you- wanting to see you, wanting to apologise, wanting to see you beam at him like you always would.
What if you won’t know that he adores you, especially now that he’s figured it out?).
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
A rain droplet falls and lands on your nose, another lands on your forehead, then another lands on your lip then more and more keep falling from the cloudy sky, falling through the leaves and landing on the bench you were currently sitting on. Goodness, you should have checked the weather before leaving your dorm. Why was it now out of all times that it had to rain, what would Alhaitham think after he finally decided to reach out to talk?
Taking your phone out to message the grey-haired about relocating, an umbrella is suddenly held over you, stopping the gentle drizzle from falling onto you. Looking up, you’re greeted by a familiar face that you have been missing too much recently.
“Hello, you,” you breathe, voice gentle and quiet and Alhaitham feels like he can finally breathe after so long, the scent of rain washing away all perplexion.
He nods at you in greeting before offering you the bouquet of flowers he was holding. A gorgeous arrangement of pink of white stare prettily at you and a man even more gorgeous expects you to accept it.
“For me?” You ask.
“For you.”
“Thank you, they’re so beautiful,” you take his gift with gentle hands, holding it close to your chest. 
“I want to apologise,” he firmly states, getting straight to the point; very Alhaitham of him. “For treating you the way I have been recently.”
You beam at him, so bright and so gorgeous that it renders him speechless, a feat pretty difficult when it comes to someone like Alhaitham who has a whole dictionary of words, in multiple languages too. Somehow, they all flock out of his mind the second you smile at him.  
“I accept your apology, thank you for reaching out, must have been hard for someone like you, huh?” You tease, standing up from the bench.
“Well, I had do for someone as special as you.” The grey-haired’s voice is deceivingly confident and assured, but you know better, especially when he looks away to hide his expression with his neatly styled bangs. 
“No need for the flattery, you know, I’ve already forgiven you.” There’s a moment of silence that occupies the air, caused by Alhaitham’s hesitation as he fishes his brain for the courage to ask you out. You speak before he can get a word out, however. “I got asked out the other day.”
“By your groupmate?”
“He has a name, you know, but, yeah. I rejected him, though,” you laugh awkwardly, almost like you were trying to cope with it by playing it off. “Did you know that he would do that?” 
“Yes. I did.”
“Is that why you were so adamant on me not hanging out with him?”
“I guess you could say that. We can talk more about it another time,” he tells you, voice gentle and caring to mask the subtle hit of jealousy he feels in his chest, scolding himself for letting someone else confess to you before him. However, it’s a minute sensation in comparison to the triumph Alhaitham feels knowing that you rejected the other party. 
“We have a lot to talk about, don’t we?”
“We do, but I want to ask you something first.” 
You nod, hugging the bouquet closer to your chest, anticipation heavy in the air as you spur him to continue. 
“If I asked you out, would you reject me too?”
A mere second passes by where you don’t respond, yet the second stretches out to what feels like eternity as Alhaitham’s stomach churns. Patience is something he doesn’t lack, but how can he be patient when his heart wants you so bad? 
Then, you take his hand, and the heavens sing at the feeling of your hand in his. “I wouldn’t, but are you asking me out?”
“Are you free right now?”
“I am. Why?”
“Let’s go out then. On a date.”
“I'd love to.” You rise up to place a lingering kiss on his cheek, one that has his heart racing with joy rather than frustration.
The smile you earn is gentle, shy, but says more than Alhaitham's words ever can.
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© EARTHTOOZ 2023, do not steal, translate, repost my fics and do not recommend my fics onto any other site.
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sanemistar · 9 days ago
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i won’t let you go — satoru gojo
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contains ★ satoru x gn!reader, established relationship, angst to fluff, petnames (baby, love, babe, etc.), 1k wc. ノ requested for my milestone event.
event m.list ★ jjk m.list
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ever since you and satoru have started dating, you heard a lot of gossip and side talks from people around you about how he's never been faithful to any of his past lovers, how he lets them go after less than six months, saying that he no longer finds them interesting, that he's done being with them, how he's never truly loved and probably never will be able to love anyone. that he's a selfish man who's nothing but a player who toys with people's hearts then tosses them away when it's all over. and you’re no exception, as it’s only a matter of time before you meet the same fate as them.
he'll let you go and forget about you as if you two have never met, because satoru gojo is incapable of loving anyone.
however, you pay no attention to these words. and even if what they say is true, you still refuse to believe that it's anything but mere nonsense. and decide to fully trust satoru like you always do.
because the satoru you know and love, the man you're dating right now, your loving boyfriend, is deeply and madly in love with you. the way he kisses you ever so passionately, how he whispers the sweetest of love words to you all the time, and how he holds you in his arms tightly every night as you doze off to sleep listening to his heartbeat. no way he's leaving you, is it? you're certain of that. after all, he's promised that he'll always love you, that he'll never leave your side no matter what, that he'll never let you be alone without him. because he can't live without you.
he finds comfort in you, you're his home as he claims. and you feel the same way about him, you can't live without him either.
although, you try your best to brush these thoughts off. you can't help but wonder if it's true that he'll let you go the same way he did with the ones before you, that he'll break all these promises about being together forever.
unaware, you let these thoughts consume you as you slowly drown in sorrow.
your head starts spinning as you begin imagining the moment he breaks it down for you that he's leaving, that he no longer wants to be with you, that he's done with you. and your stomach is instantly clenched in a knot. you feel a painful pang in your heart as it gets heavier and heavier by the second.
just when you’re about to get completely lost in your thoughts, you feel a soft touch on your shoulder. you turn around and it’s none other than satoru. he cheekily smiles at you, but his cheerful expression quickly changes into a concerned, panicked one the second you start crying.
“…toru.” you sniffle as you start sobbing uncontrollably, hot tears begin to overflow out of your now red eyes like how water flows from an overfilled cup. he rests his hand on your cheek, his thumb caresses your skin delicately as he leans in. he presses feather like kisses on your face and eyes, gently kissing your salty tears away.
“why’s my baby cryin’? what’s wrong, love?” he questions, his tone is a mix of tenderness and concern. a worried look is shown in his ocean blue eyes, it pains him tremendously seeing your teary eyes and sad face, he simply can’t stand it.
you blink, eyelashes wet from crying so much. and you pause momentarily, hesitant to let the words come out of your mouth.
“i just… thought about you possibly.. leaving me alone and..” you utter in between your sniffles, lips slightly twitching. satoru doesn’t let you continue and cuts you off mid sentence.
what you don’t know is, satoru needs you far more than you need him. you're the only one who loves him for who he is as just an ordinary human and not the strongest, you allow him to be himself freely without any restrictions, he doesn't have to fake anything around you. and most importantly, you’re the one who’s introduced him to love, you’ve shown him what it’s like to truly love someone. so leaving you has never been an option to him. the thought has never crossed his mind, not even once.
"babe listen, ‘kay?” he speaks tenderly as he rests his other hand on your cheek, cupping your face in his big hands as he brings you closer to him. eyes pierced on one another, locked in an unwavering gaze, as if you're staring into one another's soul.
“no way i’m leavin’ you, not now, not ever. so don't think about that anymore, 'kay? we’re stuck together for life." he reassures you, the tone of his voice is so soft and sweet, yet affirmative and serious. he then slightly brushes his nose against yours and it tickles you a little before his hands let go of your face, only to pull you in his arms instead. your eyes widen for a split second before you rest your head gently against his broad, well toned chest. your hands grip the back of his shirt tightly, holding onto him for dear life as you steady yourself listening to his calming heartbeat. his slender fingers delicately run through your hair while pressing a series of quick, loving pecks on the top of your head.
he smiles the moment he feels you relax in his embrace. to satoru, you being in his arms as he feels your warmth against his skin is everything he’s ever needed. as long as you’re here with him, that’s more than enough for him, he doesn’t need anything or anyone else.
“i won’t let you go.” he whispers ever so softly against your ear, his voice rings in your ears like a sweet melody. and you hum quietly, smiling against his chest as your eyes slowly shut in relief. you let yourself trust him once more as his earnest words wash over the little doubts that have been there.
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𝜗𝜚 taglist: @sylusdoll @stunies @itoshivy @hanaeriin @spkyssn @17020 @kalsplace
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heehoonies · 3 months ago
Text
under the table
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description: you and sim jaeyun have been academic rivals for as long as you can remember, competing intensely to beat the other in every class you've ever shared. for years, you've hidden your feelings for him, burying them deep down where jake can't find them, and you're hellbent on ensuring he never discovers your secret.
word count: 22k
contents: academic rivals to academic rivals with benefits to lovers, lots of angst, slight crack at points, overuse of nicknames (angel, pretty, gorgeous, etc), jake is kinda mean in the beginning, heejayhoon are flirty frat boy menaces, reader works herself to exhaustion in one scene, jake is stupid with emotions, characters get drunk/drink a lot, lots of party scenes and wonyoung as your roommate/best friend bc she's the first idol i thought of
smut warnings below the cut
a/n: thank u to my lovely bff @seung-log for letting me bounce ideas off of you and for beta reading this fic and giving me encouragement the entire way! ilysm <3
now playing: under the table by banks
smut warnings: dom!jake, sub!reader, hard and soft dom jake, implications of sub!jake (my agenda y'all he had to be here somewhere), degradation (slut, whore, etc), praise, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!!), fingering, oral (m. and f. rec), handjob, titjob, multiple orgasms, squirting, hate fucking (kinda), cumming inside, cum swallowing, cum as lube (kinda), finger in ass (f. rec), orgasm delay, marking, biting, spit swallowing, dry humping, grinding, slight 'sir' kink, choking, slight size kink (big cock/tiny pussy), fucking with clothes on, overstimulation, crying, slight dacryphilia, clit pinching/slapping.
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your eyes drag over your paper hurriedly, looking for the red ink splotched at the bottom of the page, skin tingling as blood rushes to your head.
95.
you flip your paper over, eyes darting to your side where a pair of big brown eyes are already staring back at you. jake raises an eyebrow at you, showing you the big fat 100 plastered on the top of his test sheet.
your nose scrunches as you attempt to not give any reaction to the fact that jake has beat you. once again.
“ha! knew it,” jake smirks, basking in his triumph.
“whatever, sim. you know physics is not my strongest subject.” you try to brush his statement off, but his gloating begins to get under your skin. you poke your tongue on the inside of your cheek, resisting the urge to smack him as he continues to sit there, simply staring. “what is it?”
jake shrugs, “nothing much, y/l/n, just the usual. enjoying the fact that i beat you for yet another week in a row.”
he’s absolutely over exaggerating, knowing you just topped his score in english literature yesterday. “whatever,” you repeat, not wanting to him to sense your sulkiness. “stop staring.” you wave a hand in front of his face to get him to look away, to which he relents after a moment.
jake would stare in shock and awe if he ever found out how this rivalry actually drives your anger. losing to him is always frustrating, of course, but nothing is more soul crushing than the butterflies bouncing around in your stomach every time jake looks at you and the way you fail to will them away every single time.
“wasn’t staring,” he disagrees, turning to face back towards the whiteboard, his leg beginning to bounce from the excess excitement.
“sure you weren’t,” you respond dryly, utterly too exhausted to deal with his bickering today. not with that way that stupid button up with rolled sleeves fits snugly on his biceps, round silver rimmed glasses sitting lazily on his nose, strands of hair falling delicately across his face. to top it all off, he’s wearing a ring on his pointer finger, tapping it lightly against the edge of the desk. the sound is bothersome, but not as bothersome as how utterly attracted you are to the mere image of the metal around his long finger. long fingers that are attached to large hands that lead to buff, veiny arms and broad shoulders, the whole sight nearly making you drool.
he must know how absolutely attractive he is right now. he must.
“hey jake, you going to the party at heeseung’s frat tonight?” jungwon calls from the seat behind him.
jake turns, nodding slightly, “jay and hoon are forcing me to go, i told them i already had plans but they wouldn’t listen,” you scoff, digging through your backpack for your laptop, knowing his plans were simply to study the entire weekend, plans that completely mirrored your own. he glances at you with an eyebrow raised in confusion before turning back to jungwon. “why?”
“the sorority girls are all coming,” jungwon cracks a smile, the smugness in his voice dripping with every word that tumbles out. he lowers his voice, leaning in as you still, trying to listen to jungwon’s hushed tone. “karina’s gonna be there, bro.”
you freeze, eyes glancing up as you pray you’ve heard wrong. yu karina of phi mu royalty? the most gorgeous girl on campus who also, unfortunately for your cynical brain who wants so desperately to hate the girl, happens to be the kindest person on earth? of course jake would be interested in her, just like half the student body is.
jake nods slightly, muttering a “thanks, jungwon,” before turning back towards the front. you busy yourself with logging into your laptop, willing your brain to think about anything other than jake and karina together.
god, this is going to be a long day.
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luckily enough, friday is the day where you only see jake once during your courses. you head home to your on campus apartment after the day ends, tired of your racing thoughts and hoping to recover in the confines of your warm blanket, cozied up with a good book and a cup of tea before doing some nightly revision.
you are not allowed such a reprieve from the day.
“y/nieeee!” wonyoung greets you at the door, a bright smile gracing her face. “we’re going out tonight!”
you drop your bag on the sofa before plopping down next to it, sinking deep into the cushions. “no, wony, we’re not going to heeseung’s party.”
her smile drops, pretty lips curling into a small frown, “why? and how did you even know there’s a party at heeseung’s tonight?”
“doesn’t matter. we’re absolutely not going.”
she huffs, stomping her foot lightly. “come onnnn y/n! don’t you ever get tired of working yourself to the bone week after week? i think you need a break, even if just for the night.”
you sigh, rubbing at your face with your hands, trying to fend off the impending headache that started on your walk from your classroom. you relent to her, a small sigh escaping your lips before you mutter, “jake’s going to be there.”
“and? don’t you want him to see your sexy ass in something skimpy?”
your cheeks burn at the insinuation of sim jake having his eyes on you in any context other than a negative one. “no, plus karina is going to be there. heard jungwon mentioning her specifically to him in physics today. so i’d rather not go and see something that’ll hurt my spirit more.” you pause for a moment, “he already beat my score on our physics quiz this morning, and i haven’t stopped thinking about him and her together all day. so can we please stay home?”
wonyoung sighs deeply, sitting down next to you. “who cares if they’re going to be there? you’re y/l/n y/n, you deserve to have a life outside of academics and obsessing over jake. and if he does get with her? then fuck him!”
you can feel your resolve breaking, knowing you can never truly say no to wonyoung with her pleading eyes and tiny pout.
“oh my god, fine.” you relent, sighing deeply when she jumps off of the couch with a little squeal. “oh i’m so excited! let’s go to your room, i know exactly what you’re going to wear.”
and that’s how you ended up standing outside heeseung’s frat house, your comfy tennis shoes contrasting the skin tight strappy black dress with a plunging neckline that wonyoung forced you to wear. “i’m not breaking my fucking ankle just so you can have more fun playing dress up, wony. it’s the dress and these shoes or i’m taking my ass there in sweatpants and no bra.”
“come on, let’s get a drink,” wonyoung grabs your hand and pushes her way through the crowd of bodies, “we’re probably gonna need it.”
“welcome ladies! wonyoung, nice to see you again.” you are both greeted by park jay mixing drinks when you step into the precipice of the kitchen. he does a double take when his eyes register you in front of him. “and y/n, wow! you look drop dead gorgeous. i’ve never seen you at one of these parties before.”
your cheeks burn lightly as you opt to ignore his comment, knowing jay’s reputation with the student body for being a man who… definitely gets around. wonyoung lets go of your hand, beginning to browse the drink options laid out on the kitchen island in front of her. “yeah, wonyoung made me.” you respond, coming to stand on the opposite side of jay as you eye the shaker in his hands. “you playing bartender?” he nods slightly. “what’s the strongest thing you can make me?”
jay chuckles in response as he pours what he was mixing in the tumbler. “here, try this,” he hands you the cup. you take a reluctant sip, the liquid going down with a strong burn. you shake your head lightly in response to the strength before downing the entire cup in a few gulps, needing the liquid confidence desperately.
“a woman after my own heart,” he stares for a moment before handing you another drink, this one pre-prepared. “try this one. don’t down it all at once though, i won’t be able to satisfy you if you keep that up.”
you nod, taking a small sip before a warm feeling begins to settle in your belly. “this one is tastier.”
“figured you’d like it, a sweet drink for a sweet girl.”
wonyoung cocks an eyebrow at him before shaking her head lightly at the way his gaze is completely on you, the ogling he’s giving your curves going right over your head but catching her attention instead. “me next, bartender.” he nods, turning back to face the counter. “your regular?” she nods in response, walking around him to slide up against you.
“you have a regular?” you giggle at her. wonyoung nods lightly, the small smile never leaving her lips, “jay’s been playing bartender for me since we were still in high school.”
jay makes wonyoung her drink and hands it over and the two of you exit the kitchen, opting to walk outside for some fresh air and maybe a free spot on the lawn to sit down at. there are small clumps of people scattered around the impeccably green lawn. people sip from cups and bottles, a few from cans. there are fairy lights strewn across the underside of the covered porch, and you wonder which frat member’s girlfriend convinced them to put them there. the moon illuminates the darker parts of the lawn, some of them coated in artificial light from various tiki torches strewn about aimlessly, stuck into the group roughly.
“wonyoung!” lee heeseung’s booming voice carries across the lawn from where heeseung and sunghoon are playing beer pong. “come join!”
you approach the table, “y/n, is that you?” you nod, smiling. “hi, heeseung.”
“is this your first frat party?” you nod again and he cracks a smile in response. “how are you enjoying it?”
“we just got here, so i haven’t seen much.” heeseung nods, scooting over on his side of the ping pong table.
“be my partner, wonyoung go stand by hoon.” you find nothing inside of you that wants to argue, knowing that you and heeseung get along, as much as two people who don’t know each other all that well can get along.
you glance up at heeseung as you stand next to him, “i’ve never played, heeseung.” his smile grows wider at your admission. “well, it’s our turn, so let me show you.”
heeseung moves you to stand in front of him, pressing you between the edge of the table and his wide t-shirt covered chest. “so grab the ball,” he places it in your hand before covering it with his own, much larger one. “aim, and toss!” heeseung guides you to toss the ball, it lands in one of the cups with a satisfying plop and you smile, glancing up at him where he’s smiling back down at you.
across the lawn, unbeknownst to you, an irritated sim jaeyun is ignoring his conversation with karina, watching the way heeseung is crowding your space and holding your hand. he’s not mad, no, why the hell would he be mad? he hates you. he’s got the yu karina in front of him giving him bedroom eyes, yet all he can focus on is the way heeseung presses himself against your back. jake feels the strange anger brewing inside his gut, completely checked out of his conversation with karina.
karina is here, ripe for the taking, absolutely willing and eager to flirt with jake, but all he can manage to do is stare at you, willing you with his mind to glance over at him, to see him standing here with her. he can’t believe you’re standing so close to his best friend, basically inviting him to fuck you in front of everyone here with your innocent stare.
wonyoung takes the cup and downs it, “next time let her throw for herself, hee.” sunghoon accuses, “no cheating in beer pong, man.”
“y/n’s never played!” heeseung defends, never moving from where he’s got you trapped, his body feeling so close and his towering size intimidating you a bit. “had to teach her, it’s the least i can do.”
before he can register how his body is reacting, jake’s leaving karina without so much as a second glance as his legs carry him over to the table. “move over hoon,” jake commands from the other side of the table. heeseung meets jake’s eye, having a silent conversation that not even sunghoon is privy to. heeseung gives sunghoon a look and sunghoon relents, allowing jake to take his place before wandering off to see jay in the kitchen and maybe find out if riki is passed out somewhere. wonyoung catches your gaze, her eyes as confused as yours are at the sudden intrusion. “gonna school you, y/n, just like i did in physics this morning.”
you roll your eyes while heeseung feels your body tense in his hold. “it’s okay, we got this. jake sucks at beer pong.” he says lowly, smiling to reassure you. you nod your head in response.
jake does, in fact, suck at beer pong, a fact you become well aware of within his first few throws. usually jake is decent at beer pong! but heeseung has watched jake down multiple drinks this evening, and when jake gets drunk, his beer pong skills significantly drop off. jake swears under his breath with every miss, hatred brewing behind his gaze every time he sees the way heeseung keeps you held in place, the way the pair of you celebrate every successful toss with a small high five, heeseung’s hand dwarfing yours in size.
“you lose, jakey boy,” heeseung announces as you sink the last ball with a bit of guidance from him. jake downs the last cup before slamming it back down on the table, the flimsy plastic being crushed beneath his hand a bit. heeseung gives you a squeeze of the shoulders and one last high five, “don’t be a sore loser, man.” heeseung moves, finally letting you escape as you walk to meet wonyoung at the other end of the table. heeseung grabs jake by the scruff of his neck, guiding him to another part of the backyard.
“god, that was so weird.” wonyoung shakes her head, “why was jake so mad? and heeseung is being weird too…”
the words swim in your own brain. was jake mad that you were there at all? you’ve never been to one of heeseung’s parties before, so that could be it, he could feel like you’re intruding on his space. you’d feel the same way if he ever raided one of you and wonyoung’s girls’ nights; though wonyoung would argue that that is a completely different situation if she ever heard your battling thoughts. was it because heeseung was so close to you? did he think you were cheating at beer pong like sunghoon did? that’s just too many questions for your already intoxicated brain to handle. your heart swelled at the fleeting thought that maybe he was angry that heeseung was close to you for an entirely different reason, completely unrelated to the game or his urge to beat you in every aspect of your shared existence.
“i think it’s time for us to go home,” you interject her ramblings, the entire situation beginning to overwhelm you, “i’m feeling tired.”
wonyoung eyes you with a raised eyebrow and a slightly squeaky whine as the two of you walk inside, “we just got here! come dance with me at least for a little bit.”
across the lawn, heeseung is scolding jake. “why are you being a fucking asshole to y/n, bro? she’s just trying to have a good time.”
“me? being an asshole? that’s rich coming from you, you we’re basically fucking her against the table, heeseung!”
heeseung rolls his eyes, knowing he was being very tame in comparison to some of the compromising situations jake has seen him in before. and it’s not like you or heeseung felt that way about each other. “i knew you’d be mad at that. jake, open your fucking eyes. people who actually hate each other don’t feel that way you do about her.”
jake’s drunk mind refuses to relent to heeseung’s words, always needing to be right and knowing heeseung is dead wrong, “shut the fuck up, you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“i do, actually, and i know better than you do.” heeseung shakes his head, sighing, “you’re too stubborn for your own good, sim.”
“fuck off man,” jake shakes himself out of heeseung’s grasp, heading inside for god only knows what reason. just to get away from heeseung and from his confusing thoughts of you, he supposes, in his far too drunk mind.
wonyoung tugs you into the living room that’s been taken over as a dance floor, but you tear away from her before she can drag you into the sea of people, trying to avoid dancing entirely. “i’m going to find the bathroom,” wonyoung’s attention is grabbed by a mutual friend of yours and she stays to chat with them, watching you stumble into a nearby hallway out of the corner of her eye, following your figure until you disappear around a corner, worry bubbling in her gut.
someone stumbles into you, nearly knocking you onto your ass. “hey, watch where you’re g-”
your sentence is cut off by someone pressing you against the wall in the dark corner of the hall, your eyes rising to meet a pair of pretty brown ones, jake’s pupils wide from how buzzed he is right now. you can feel yourself tensing in his hold, both scared and turned on from the mere proximity of his body. the heat of his body overwhelms you as he places one hand on your waist, the other against the wall at the side of your head, trapping you in place beneath his towering frame. “get off of me, sim,” you push against his chest, his body not moving an inch. fuck him and his broad shoulders and his thick, toned arms.
“are you trying to piss me off or something?” jake seethes, and you can see the anger in his eyes and the way he grips your hip tightly, threatening to leave a bruise. “trying to fuck all my friends? just opening your legs for every one of them like a whore?”
“fuck off, jake!” you argue, anger bubbling as you watch his eyes scan across your face, trying to ignore the bubbling arousal building in your gut, overwhelmed by his voice, eyes, presence, all of him being so terrifyingly close to you. “if i wanted to fuck all your friends, i already would’ve!”
jake’s hand next to your head is suddenly gripping your chin, forcing your head to look up further and stare up at his face. he sucks at the inside of his cheek, trying to reel his anger back in. “listen here, princess. none of my friends would ever fuck you, so stop trying before you embarrass yourself. you’re pathetic,” he moves his hand from your chin to wrap around your throat lazily. you can’t help the way your panties stick to you, wetness growing at the sight of him degrading you, his big hand wrapped around your delicate neck. you can feel your brain slipping already. “you’re worthless, do you understand me?”
you nod dumbly, swallowing a bit of spit to keep yourself from drooling.
“good girl,” is all his drunk brain can tell you, voice gravelly and lower than you’ve ever heard. his vocal tone makes the feeling in the pit of your stomach reignite. “remember your place, doll.” you nod mindlessly again before he lets go of your throat, his hand at your waist shoving you away from him. “get out of here before i have to teach you a lesson.”
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monday rolls around unceremoniously, and knowing you’ll have to see jake first thing this morning is making you consider skipping class entirely.
you shake your head, knowing that nobody, especially not a man, is worth jeopardizing your grades over. no matter how annoyingly attractive he is.
you plop down in your seat, ready for the lecture. jake saunters in, his usual smile plastered on his face before it drops at the mere sight of you. your heart sinks, knowing that even your academic rivalry has never produced that sort of reaction from him.
“so, you and heeseung, huh?”
jake sits down next to you, eyeing you inquisitively. “what? absolutely not!” you hiss, “why the hell would you think that, sim?”
“beer pong,” he mentions, in a tone that makes you feel like you’re stupid. “i don’t like heeseung and i know he doesn’t like me. be serious now, jake.” you scold him, desperately hoping he’ll drop this.
“didn’t seem like it to me,” is all he says before tugging his laptop out of his bag and watching as the professor walks in the classroom.
“whatever, sim,” you brush him off, and the rest of your sentence gets caught on your tongue. “not like i care what you think,” you wish you could say, despite knowing just how much of a lie it is.
“good morning everyone, i finally have your test from last week fully graded,” your history teacher greets everyone and begins winding up and down the aisles, handing back papers with various numbers scribbled on top of each.
she places your paper gently on your desk, a huge smile greeting your face once you see the large 100 sitting on top in deep red ink.
“don’t start gloating now, princess. i got the same. you're not special,” jake’s words kill your remaining semblance of a good mood, feeling like he’s being meaner than he usually is.
“jake it’s 8 am, stop being such an asshole so early in the morning.” you fight, shoving the paper in your bag unceremoniously, missing the small frown that flits across his features. his thoughts flick back to heeseung scolding him at the party, making the frown grow on his face. you nose scrunches at his actions not turning you on like they normally did, instead just making you angry at him.
he shouldn’t feel bad, he really shouldn’t, and he's tricked his brain into thinking he truly doesn't care. your relationship has always been like this. something about seeing you this weekend made jake extra angry, and you’re the one he needs to take it out on. and if he kills your mood to match his already bad one? then all the better for his ego, annoying you being one of his favorite past times.
he continues his nasty quips throughout the rest of class, ones you try your hardest to ignore but somehow they slip under your armor and make hits at your fragile heart every single time.
after spending your down time studying in the library, you reach your next course and sit next to jake in math, leg bouncing roughly at the anxiety brewing at the thought of losing to jake again.
“oh thank god,” you sigh in relief, a 99 with a large circle sitting at the top of your surprise quiz from last week. jake feels his face twitch as he glances over to find your test sporting a higher score. he never loses to you in math, and he can feel his anger boiling.
“lucky break, y/n,” he bites, not missing the way your eyes turn downcast silently instead of fighting him with a quick, competitive response. jake doesn’t know why the sight of you ignoring him and not even arguing back makes his heart twinge.
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class after class for the rest of the week, you keep topping jake’s score, but you can’t bring it in yourself to care. you feel like his combative words are filled with real venom now, versus the usual merely competitive undertones that they carry. sure, you enjoy when he’s mean sometimes, but it feels like he’s somehow crossed an imaginary line between sexy and hateful. and your brain can only take so much negative rhetoric before you’re closing in on yourself, blurring the edges of your consciousness to prevent any more hurt from being cast upon your body and mind. you barely stumble your way through the week, struggling to even drag yourself to class every day, knowing you’ll be met with his usually soft brown eyes staring daggers into your side profile.
you’re so worn down from the emotional toll this week has taken on you that you don’t even care that wonyoung shoves you into another tiny dress and drags you to another party hosted by heeseung. you choose to keep your inner turmoil to yourself, and wonyoung relents, allowing you to have your secrets for now despite being able to sense that something is absolutely wrong.
“jay, give y/n what you gave her last weekend, she needs it.”
“welcome back, pretty girl,” jay greets you, “bad week?” you nod numbly, meeting his gaze with obviously tired eyes. “let jay help you.” he gives you a soft smile, beginning to whip up exactly what he gave you last weekend.
“thank you, jay,” jay notices the smile doesn’t reach your eyes, but he doesn’t take it personally. “anytime, pretty.”
wonyoung grabs the nearest bottle of whatever beer they’ve stocked up on for this so called rager and follows you as you wander aimlessly. she grips your elbow, leading you to an open seat on the sofa in the living room. the party is less packed than last weekend, with only a few people mingling around the house, the living room no longer being taken over by an impromptu dance floor.
“hi y/n, hey wonyoung,” jungwon greets the pair of you, dropping down into the cushion next to wonyoung. “what’s up? enjoying the party?”
you nod simply, nursing your cup gently as your eyes can’t focus on any one thing in the room, vision slightly fuzzy and never once regaining clarity as you let all thoughts leave your head.
“you with us, y/n?” wonyoung waves a hand in front of your face. unbeknownst to you, ten minutes had already passed and both wony and jungwon had watched you as you barely even moved, aside from the cup occasionally being pressed to your lips. “yeah, sorry.” you mumble out. wonyoung gives your shoulder a small squeeze before rising to her feet. “we’ll be right back, jungwon and i need a refill, okay?” you nod as her figure disappears into the house.
a large shadow casts above you, drawing your attention up to meet big brown eyes. “why are you here? here to gloat some more?”
a small sigh leaves your lips as you tear your gaze from him before downing your drink at once, eyes fluttering shut. you place the cup on the coffee table in front of you before looking back up at him, “i don’t have the energy to fight with you right now, jake. please just leave me alone.”
jake sits down next to you, hand resting on your knee as he whispers lowly for only you to hear, “so you’re trying to act like you didn’t just kick my ass all week? you’re not gonna say anything about that?”
you nod a little, unable to meet his gaze, “jake, i’m so tired, please. i don’t want to fight right now.”
seeing the vision of you, a usually fiery, independent, self assured woman, surrendering to his words so easily causes a twitch in jake’s pants, his jeans beginning to feel a little too snug all of a sudden. “is that so?” he teases, his anger from the week still present in the undertones of his speech. “so you don’t even have the energy to be a good rival and taunt me back?”
you shake your head, “jake, please,” you whine, and its music to his ears. he squeezes your knee lightly, invading your space some more. “please what, angel?”
your cheeks burn at the sudden nickname, mouth going dry at the three little words he’s just whispered to you. you stare at him with doe eyes and a shut mouth. “what is it, you can tell me.” he tries to coax the admission out of you.
“just so tired…” you relent, limbs feeling heavy.
jake stands and pulls you to your feet, ignoring how heavy his cock feels behind his denim as he leads you upstairs, “come on, let’s go find somewhere you can lie down.” the sudden kindness he’s showing you would strike you as strange if you were in your right mind, but the fogginess taking over your brain hides how absolutely weird this would be on a normal day between you and jake.
jake tugs the door of heeseung’s room open, guiding you inside before shutting the door and locking it. “lie down.” his voice is gentle, coaxing you into submission and a sense of calm, feeling safer knowing you’re away from the crowd and are able to breathe a little better without a thin sheen of smoke filling your lungs and obscuring your vision.
you obey, crawling under the covers that he’s pulled back for you before he tucks you under the plush material. “you shouldn’t be here while you’re feeling like this,” jake scolds you. your eyes shut gently, already falling asleep with a heavy heart and heavier limbs. jake watches you with a protective gaze as you drift off into dreamland, a sigh leaving his lips knowing you might finally have time to just exist, versus your usual act of constantly pushing yourself to the limit and further.
“you can’t just let people crash in my room, jake!”
“it’s y/n, hee.” jake glances up at the taller man for a moment, “she… something was wrong, but i didn’t want to send her home by herself. wonyoung certainly wasn’t going to go with her.” he scoffs at your roommate’s inability to grasp how strange you were acting. heeseung’s eyebrows shoot up at this admission, nodding slightly. “is she okay now?” he questions.
“she’s still sleeping,” heeseung had caught jake sneaking out of his room trying to get you a glass of water for when you wake up, planning to run up and continue watching you as you slept. not in a creepy way, just in a i don’t want anybody to come in this room trying to fuck on heeseung’s bed while y/n is sleeping there kind of way, as well as a i need to make sure no one tries to take advantage of her kind of way. why he wanted to do all of this, why he was treating you this way at all was still a mystery to him. “didn’t want anyone coming in and waking her up or messing with her while she’s sleeping.”
heeseung scoffs a bit at his answer, “you still don’t get it, do you?”
jake watches him with a blank stare, “get what?” he shakes his head in response, muttering a quiet “nothing,” before peeking inside his room to check on you.
“she’s fine, heeseung.” jake argues, quietly yanking the door shut. “let her sleep.”
heeseung shakes his head, “just let her uber home with wonyoung,” he suggests, testing the waters further to prove his theory is rocksolid.
jake gives him a glare that could kill, “did you not fucking listen to a word i just said?”
bingo.
“i’m kidding, chill.”
jake lets the comment go as well as he can, “if you’re done saying stupid shit, can you go grab me some water for when she wakes up?” heeseung scoffs at his words, but returns shortly with a bottle of water, to which jake gives him a small thank you in return.
“just… try not to be an asshole when she wakes up, okay?”
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you don’t know how you got home that night. wonyoung told you it was jungwon ordering the three of you an uber, opting to leave with you since he lives in your building with sunoo and riki as his roommates. the rest of the weekend passes unceremoniously, your color slowly coming back after an absolutely off week. as you slouch down into the chair next to his on monday morning, you can only hope jake doesn’t fuck up your good mood as fast as he did last week.
“had a fun weekend?” you can’t decipher the tone of his voice.
“it was fine, i guess.” you shrug in response. “i don’t remember most of it.” you admit, not even caring how absolutely embarrassing that sounds, especially coming from someone of your academic caliber and positive reputation.
jake’s face seems to drop at your admission, quickly shaking off the expression, “well, are you ready for another week of me kicking your ass?”
“we’ll see about that, sim.” you smirk lightly, feeling your spark in this rivalry returning a bit, along with your deeply imbedded feelings for the man beside you. jake seems to have let go of the intense hatred he was holding the previous week, a friendly feeling returning to your long standing rivalry. “don’t think i’m gonna go easy on you, now.”
jake smiles secretly, happy to see the pep back in your step, so to speak. he hated seeing you the way you were at the party, your eyes looking lifeless and staring into the void aimlessly before he laid you down for a well deserved nap.
“hmm, what’d you get?” you peer down at the paper your professor has just laid in front of you. “97. you?”
“98.”
jake groans loudly, “god, you can’t just let me win, can you?” a smile graces your lips, “nope, you’ll have to fight me for it, sim.”
“alright, you two,” jay teases the two of you and you turn to face him. “y/n, you’ll never guess what today is.” he smiles brightly.
“i’m not sure, what is it, jay?”
“it’s my birthday, and i’m throwing a party at the frat tonight.” you smile at his admission, “will i see you there?”
jake shakes his head, teasing, “no, she’s probably gotta stud-”
“sure,” you interrupt jake, shooting him a glare before looking back at jay, “i’ll be there, jay.” you offer him a small smile, one which he mirrors while jake looks between the two of you with a scowl.
oh, you’re gonna get it.
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you arrive at jay’s party, opting for a more casual pleated skirt and t-shirt since jay told you it was casual wear and he wanted a chill vibe, just some close friends. you’re assuming he invited you because of wonyoung, who had to opt out of tonight’s festivities since the poor girl caught a nasty case of the flu over the weekend. you heated up some canned soup for her and made tea before leaving for the night, telling her to text you immediately if she starts to feel worse.
“hi, gorgeous,” heeseung smiles at you, greeting you warmly and placing a drink in your hands.
“hi, heeseung,” you return his smile, watching him over the rim of your solo cup as you take a sip. “damn, this is nasty. what the hell is this?”
he shrugs lightly, “beats me. jay’s mingling instead of making drinks, so sunghoon’s doing the best that he can, i guess.” you nod before bravely taking another sip of the gross concoction.
“where’s the birthday boy?”
“ask and he shall appear,” jay smiles, coming to stand next to heeseung, “hi, angel, glad you could make it.” you smile at the two men towering over you. “thanks for inviting me, and wony sends her apologies. she got sick over the weekend.”
“that’s alright, hope she feels better.” heeseung says before the two of them begin whisking you off into another part of the house. heeseung separates from you and jay to greet a few people, jay’s hand on your waist to guide you without you getting lost. “i heard hoon’s making drinks? this is nasty, jay, have you taught him nothing?” you tease, glancing behind you at a loud noise sounds behind you. after finding nothing, you begin to turn back to jay before your eyes find jake standing with karina. the sight makes your blood boil, but you nearly shiver after finding him already staring over at you and jay out of the side of his eye. you shake off his dark stare, returning to your conversation with jay, not noticing the way his hand hasn’t left your waist despite the two of you no longer moving through the house.
“i’ll be right back,” jake tells karina, no longer focused on their conversation. karina scoffs lightly, knowing this is the second time in two weeks that jake has left her high and dry while she’s been trying to talk to him.
“jay,” jake greets his best friend, earning him a look of confusion from the birthday boy, “y/n, can i talk to you?” you glance at jay with a confused look, the man in front of you mirroring the same expression back at you.
“i– sure, jake.” you relent, setting down your already empty cup on a random surface before he’s tugging your arm, not caring about the searing grip he has on your wrist.
“didn’t i warn you to not fuck my friends?” jake’s hushed voice meets your ears, a frown pulling onto your lips at the question. you don’t remember talking about being attracted to any of his friends at all, let alone with jake himself.
“what are you talking about, sim?” you question, growing irritated at the implication that he probably thinks you’re easy.
“god, you’re so stupid sometimes,” he growls, pressing you against a bedroom door in the empty hallway. “you don’t even see them all eye fucking you? don’t be naive, y/n.”
you shake your head, convinced he’s fucking with you. “jake, your friends aren’t eye fucking me it’s called being friends with the opposite sex, you should try it instead of being an asshole all the time!”
jake yanks the handle near your hip, tugging the door open and shoving both of you inside before locking it behind him. “you drive me up the fucking wall, you know that?”
“the feeling is mutual, sim,” you deadpan. “are you done yelling at me? i’m ready to leave this fucking room and get far away from you. i’m trying to enjoy myself tonight, jake, i don’t need you fucking with my mood again.”
the dam in his mind breaks, and suddenly jake feels all his resolve slip away. he pushes you up against the closed door and squishes you against it. “god, you’re so fucking annoying, you know that? always know how to push my fucking buttons.”
the proximity has you holding your breath, waiting for his next searing words to tumble out of those plush lips.
“stop staring at my lips,” he demands, taking both of your wrists in one grip of his hand and holding them above your head. “you gonna keep making me mad?”
“stop fucking with me, jake, let me leave.” you know your words hold no weight in either of your minds, your body betraying you as your arousal is evident in the way your legs squeeze together.
jake shakes his head, “you need to shut up and take what i give you, since you’re so ready to be a slut for all my friends.” he grips your chin and squishes your cheeks with his other hand. “you gonna behave for me? or are you gonna be a brat?”
you finally relent, letting go of your argumentative front that you’ve put up around him for years as his grip on your cheeks loosens. you relish in the feeling of allowing him to take control, of jake offering you a moment to just exist without any expectations or responsibilities, to let him take care of you completely, “‘m gonna be good for you, jake.” you watch him with big eyes, his stare unrelenting as he watches you for any sort of discomfort.
“you sure you can take it, angel? i’m not gonna be nice.” you nod briefly, trying to use your hand before he grips tighter, “what is it, pretty? you can still back out now.” he tells you, giving you full control of the situation for a moment.
he watches a look flash across your face before you look downwards, embarrassed at the thought of what you’re about to ask. jake tugs your face to look back at up at him roughly, “want you to choke me,” you mumble. he grins wildly at your admission, hand on your chin snaking down to rest at the base of your neck. “like that, baby?” you nod slightly, pressing your legs further together under his intense stare. “tell jake what else you need.”
you take advantage of his momentary kindness to lean forward and capture his plump lips in a kiss, dirty and messy and utterly desperate. desperate for his touch, however you can get it. jake returns the favor, slotting his lips against yours, feeling every crevice of your gorgeous lips under his own. he fights back a moan, knowing he needs to maintain dominance over the situation. he squeezes tighter on your neck and you let out a small moan, allowing him to press his tongue into your mouth. you nearly gasp at the intrusion, relishing in the feeling of him nearly eating you from the inside out.
jake pulls away to stare back at your face, your expression already portraying how utterly fucked out you are just from a few touches. “can’t just take what you’re given, can you? greedy girl.” his tone is laced with warning.
“i can take it,” you argue lightly and he chuckles before moving you from the door to the bed, making you lie down on the mattress in front of him. “promise.”
“i believe you.” jake admits, sinking down to his knees and flipping your skirt up before pressing his nose against your clothed core. “bet you taste delicious, angel,” he stays there for a moment, licking against the fabric of your panties before pulling away. jake stands back up and unbuckles his belt, “another time, baby. need to fuck the attitude right out of you. always getting on my nerves.”
you watch as jake drops his pants and boxes just below his knees, revealing a thick, veiny cock with a blushing red tip. your cheeks go redder at the sight of him, already afraid of the stretch, “you’re so big.” the words tumble out of you without realization, your cheeks burning at the sudden admission.
“i told you i’m the best, baby,” he taunts you, “don’t worry, i’ll make you take it all like the cock slut we both know you are.” jake rips your panties, pulling a gasp from your chest as he holds the tip against your wet folds, the sight hidden from you by your skirt, “god, this turns you on, doesn’t it? when i call you a pretty little whore?” he feels your walls tighten slightly around his tip at his words and smirk casts over jake’s lips. “so all this time, my little angel has been getting wet every time we talk? dirty girl.” you shake your head, trying to hide your embarrassed face as your cheeks heat up. “don’t lie baby, i can feel you clenching around me.”
all the air is knocked out of your lungs when jake buries his huge length all the way inside, your hands going up to grab his biceps for something to hang onto as he begins ravaging you with a brutal pace, “see what you do to me? you make me so fucking angry, i can’t help but take it all out on you.” he feels your walls flutter around him as his thick cock drags against you, feeling every ridge of your pussy as his tip bruises your cervix with repeated precision. “god, you’re taking me so well, tiny little pussy was made to be destroyed by my big cock, wasn’t it?”
you nod dumbly, feeling cock drunk already, feeling yourself slip further away from reality with every drag of his veiny dick passing through you. jake fucks you into the mattress like he’s trying to split your entire body in half. you can’t get enough as jake moves your arms for a moment to tear your shirt off your body hastily, both hands reaching around and unclasping your bra before discarding both items somewhere in this random bedroom. he watches your tits bounce with each deep thrust, “god look at your tits baby, fuck– i could just eat you alive right now.”
“please,” you whine, not knowing what you’re whining for. “please what, my pretty little slut?” you don’t answer him, moaning loudly as he takes both your tits in his grasp, a hand holding each in a grip that’ll surely leave a mark.
“that’s what i thought,” he quips as he continues to plow into you, his head starting to spin from the feeling of your walls sucking him in with every thrust, never fully accommodating his size, “fuck, just take it all like a good cock slut, you were made to take me.”
his squeezing of one of your tits halts, moving down to pinch your swollen clit harshly, smiling wickedly at the groan of pain and pleasure that escapes your mouth. “too much?” you nod roughly, pleading eyes meeting his dark gaze, “too fucking bad.”
jake begins alternating between pinching and slapping your clit, relishing at the slight squeeze each action grants him, feeling himself tumbling to the edge already. “don’t you dare fucking cum,” he warns as he grabs your hips, shoving you up and down on his length like a fuckdoll, and you take it, sitting pretty with gasps leaving your parted lips as he chases his own pleasure. “fuuuuuck,” jake stills, cumming deep inside you, holding your hips flush to his body until he’s milked his own cock dry. you can feel your body on the edge of an orgasm as you wait for jake to finish you off now that he’s cum inside you.
he pulls out, watching his cum drip out of your gaping hole, “god, you still make me so fucking mad,” jake shoves his length back inside roughly, stuffing his cum back into you, “can’t wait to watch you come undone beneath me.” he moans, rubbing rough circles against your clit. you throw your head back, moaning his name loudly.
“that’s it, pretty baby, let everyone know who’s making you feel this good,” jake leans in and bites the skin on your neck, sucking and licking at the spot to soothe it after. he places a sloppy, open mouthed kiss there before leaning up and prying your lips apart, mouth opening obediently. your eyes open in shock, watching him hover above you before he spits in your mouth, then sliding his hand down to rest at the base of your neck, squeezing lightly. “swallow it.” you follow his instructions promptly, a moan escaping your lips after feeling it slide down your throat paired with the pressure he’s applying.
“cum all over my cock, angel,” jake growls in your ear, the grit in his voice causing your dam to break, the rubber band in your stomach snapping before your eyes roll back, colors passing through your vision and limbs feeling numb and tingly as jake fucks you through your orgasm.
“jake, stop–” you attempt to push him off, your actions doing nothing to halt his movements, feeling overstimulated as your orgasm finishes washing over your body. “jake–”
jake leans in, capturing your lips in a messy, sloppy kiss to distract you as he slowly slips out of you, taking his fingers and shoving the cum mixture back into your leaking hole. he pulls away, glancing down at the sight of both of your fluids leaking out of you, groaning at the sight, “fuck, you’re perfect,” his head feels dizzy as he catches your lips again, biting softly against your bottom lip before pulling away again. “let me clean you up,” jake presses a final kiss against your lips, resisting the urge to slip his tongue down your throat as far as it can reach.
he returns shortly with a wet cloth from the en suite bathroom, manhandling you to sit further up against the pillows before wiping you down, getting the cum out of your gaping hole. he returns to the bathroom, wiping himself off before tugging his jeans back onto his hips and tossing the washcloth in the trash. whatever frat brother this room belongs to certainly won’t be missing that…
you stare up at the ceiling, panting and wiping the sweat from your forehead. “fuck.”
“fuck what? fuck you? i just did,” he argues, grabbing your torn panties from wherever they landed in the room and pocketing them discreetly.
“shut up, sim,” you cover your eyes with your arm, refusing to look at him.
“hey, look at me,” jake pries your arm off and your eyes open slowly, the sight of him with his post sex glow knocking the wind out of you. “you okay?” his question is sincere, his gaze on you doubly so. you nod lightly, a small smile taking over your features, “good.”
“can’t believe you ripped my panties…” you grumble, sitting up slightly to look for your shirt and bra. jake’s hands grip your tits absentmindedly, “i’m not a fucking stressball, jake!” jake just laughs, pinching one of your nipples in retaliation, watching the nearly silent moan that leaves your perfect pink lips. “fuck, don’t do that again unless you want another round.”
he perks up at the words, “you really mean that?”
“i–”
a loud pounding on the door startles both of you, “open the fuck up!”
you scramble to grab your bra and shirt, shoving them back on as jake wills his slowly rising dick to lower once more. he glances at you and you nod at him. jake unlocks the door and swings it open, meeting the eyes of a very tall, very angry man.
“get the fuck out, both of you,” he booms and the two of you scurry out quickly, a small giggle escaping your lips at the sight of his bright red, angry face.
“he was gonna kick your ass, jake…” you tell him as the two of you rush down the hallway, unknowingly in the opposite direction of the living room.
“would’ve been worth it,” jake smirks, stopping and gripping your hips lightly, the intimacy of his thumbs rubbing on your bare skin making your head spin, “your pussy is heaven.”
you smile, small and subtle, eyes wide, “not mad at me anymore?”
he shakes his lightly, “could never really be mad at you.” jake offers you a coy smile.
“doesn’t seem like it,” you argue, smile slipping from your features the tiniest bit. “well… every time you make me mad i can just fuck you like that again. is that what you want, pretty girl?”
your cheeks burn at the sudden nickname, “is that what you want, jake?” he nods slightly, “i’ll fuck you whenever and where ever you want if you’ll let me, baby. no strings attached.”
your heart drops at those three little words leaving his lips, hope of jake reciprocating your feeling sinking deeper into the abyss that clouds your mind most days. his offer is a glimmer of hope, your brain reeling to feel him like that again, even if he’s ‘fucking the attitude’ out of you over and over. you nod, “yeah, i’d like that.” you half-lie, continuing to shield your true feelings from him.
“just promise not to fuck any of my friends… you’re mine now.” you nod, heart fluttering at the implication of being jake’s, and the sudden possessiveness he’s now displaying.
jake’s grin grows, pulling you in by your hips for a frantic kiss, pushing his tongue past the expanse of your lips, exploring your mouth with need. you sink into his hold, stomach fluttering at the feeling of one of his hands reaching your ass, squeezing it in his large palm. you groan against his plush lips, allowing him to slip his tongue further down your throat.
“oh my god–” a shrill voice screeching from behind you has you pulling away from jake, seeing sunoo standing there, his hand now covering his eyes, “i’m so sorry, i– jay just told me to round everyone up for cake.” he apologizes and promptly rushes back to the living room.
“don’t worry,” jake whispers, “i can make sure sunoo doesn’t tell a soul, say the word and it’ll be our little secret, angel.”
you nod slightly, staring up at him with wide eyes, “thank you, jake.”
“anything you need and i’ll make it happen,” he promises, giving your ass one last squeeze and a small smack before guiding you forward, “go join the party, i’ll be there in a minute.”
“where have you been, dude?” heeseung questions jake after the cake is cut and shared, prompting the shorter man to shake his head. “nowhere important.” he can see the hidden smile on jake’s face as heeseung watches him, smirking knowingly as he catches your eye in the crowd where you’re talking to riki and waves you over. you excuse yourself and approach the two of them, trying to hide the blush in your cheeks when you glance at jake.
“hi, y/n,” heeseung smiles, “wish you were here earlier, i kicked the birthday boy’s ass in beer pong. it was quite the show.”
you return his smile, “sorry i missed it,” you apologize sincerely, looking down at your plate as you break off another piece of cake to eat. heeseung glances at jake, the smirk still covering his lips. heeseung takes in the way the tips of jake’s ears are turning red as he watches you place a piece of cake in your mouth. “nowhere important, right?” his low tone misses your ears as you munch happily on the vanilla treat.
shit.
jake smacks the back of his head, shooting daggers at his best friend as he whispers, “shut up.”
heeseung leans over to speak into jake’s ear, “just don’t break her heart, jakey boy.”
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things are normal between you and jake during the classes you share, for the most part. you can’t stop staring, watching jake and zoning out as your professors drone on about whatever topic you’re covering during the period. you watch his eyes, beautiful and brown, as they stare forward, glancing to meet your gaze every once in a while. you watch his lips, perfectly plump and pink, which tug into a smirk every time jake catches you staring, biting down on his bottom lip at the sight of you watching him.
you take in the overwhelming presence of him, your nerves running in overdrive since the night before, knowing how absolutely stuffed he makes you feel, how jake’s big hands burn where ever they touch, leaving you yearning to be constantly held by him and his soft palms. his hair urges to have a hand run through it, dark and falling across his face in a satisfying way, framing his forehead delicately.
everything about the man beside you overwhelms you, and you can’t seem to look away.
god, you’re fucked.
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“what the hell is going on between you and jake?” jay questions as you approach him, nearly falling into him as you try to walk around despite the slight buzz filling your bloodstream.
“jongseong, i don’t know what you’re talking about,” you tell him, grabbing a seltzer from the fridge and cracking it open, not hesitating to take a few gulps before returning your gaze to him. his eyebrow is quirked up when you look at him again, “you’ve never called me by my government name,” jay challenges, smirking with a knowing look.
“shut up,” you move to cover his mouth, to which he swats your hand away easily, his tolerance much higher than yours. “no,” he argues grabbing your wrist as you try to smack him, “i wanna know.”
you narrow your eyes at him, an action he sees right through, knowing you’re not actually angry seeing the blush growing on your cheeks, “nothing is going on between me and jake.”
“no, there’s something there,” jay tells you, “are you two fucking?”
you nearly spit your sip of seltzer out, coughing for a moment as he hits your back lightly, concern washing over jay’s sharp features. “jesus christ, y/n, don’t die in the frat house, none of these idiots here would know how to help you.”
you shake your head, breathing returning to normal, “jay, we’re not fucking.”
“you’re lying,” jay cracks a knowing smile, laughing lightly, “anyone with eyeballs is able to see there’s something there.”
your resolve begins to crumble, the alcohol seeming to take over your brain more and more, “i– i don’t know what we’re doing…” you shake your head lightly, “we… we fucked on your birthday,” you relinquish. “i… i don’t know how he feels about me, jay.” you hear a noise escape your throat, one that sounds far too vulnerable, and you chase the sound with another swig from the can in your hand. “i try not to think about feelings that much, honestly, they’re so overwhelming.”
jay laughs, “yeah… me neither, don’t worry,” he clinks his solo cup against your can and you both take a sip, “who made the first move?”
“jay!” you shove him, “stop asking so many damn questions!”
“tell her not to shove me like that, jake,” jay says, watching you with satisfaction as your eyes go wide and you whip around to see jake approaching the two of you. 
“don’t hit jay, princess, he has weak skin,” jake tells you, to which jay retorts with “fuck you, sim, you’re supposed to be on my side!”
princess?
well that’s a new one… all of these new nicknames jake has given you since he fucked you have been driving your head crazy, less than platonic feelings swelling inside your tiny, drunk brain as you stare up at the man who grabs a water from the fridge.
“i’m on no one’s side here,” jake argues, twisting the cap off and taking a sip of water. you watch his throat suck the liquid down, adam’s apple bobbing. your body buzzes in response to the small action, stopping yourself from reaching out and running a finger, or your tongue, over the expanse of his throat.
jay tucks a finger under your chin, pushing upwards to make your jaw return to the rest of your face. you smack him on the chest, “don’t touch me, jongseong,” you warn, trying to ignore the fact that you were nearly drooling over jake right in front of him.
“you wanted him to see you drooling, then?” jay counters, voice low enough for jake to miss it.
“shut the hell up,” you ignore his words, eyes returning to jake who is watching you expectantly.
“i’ll be back,” jay exits the kitchen, leaving the two of you alone in the dimly lit room among the various bottles of liquor lining the island and fridge.
“hi, gorgeous,” jake invades your space, pushing you backwards until your back is pressed against the edge of the cold granite countertop.
“jake!” you place your hands on his chest, trying to push him away, “are you trying to make sure people see us like this?!” jake wraps a hand around you, his palm splayed against your upper back, pressing you closer to him.
“maybe.”
you shake your head, watching his eyes darken as he watches you, “did you have fun talking to jay, baby?”
“jake, i’m not going to fuck him, so don’t even start getting mad,” you warn.
“i know pretty, i’m the only one who gets to see you like that, aren’t i?” your silence paired with flushed cheeks gives jake the answer he’s searching for, grinning in response. “good.”
“meet me in the bathroom at the end of the hall in two minutes,” he whispers into your ear before departing from the kitchen, the words making you squish your legs together. you wait with bated breath, watching as the clock on the microwave ticks to the next minute. fuck it, you mumble before setting your drink down and following him, knocking softly on the door before jake tugs you inside.
“hmm, eager, are we?” jake teases, locking the door and pulling you against him by your waist as he leans against the bathroom counter. “couldn’t wait any longer, could you?” you shake your head, words failing you as your face sits desperately close to his, desire swirling beneath your skin. “my obedient girl.”
“wanna suck your dick,” you beg, jake groaning and leaning his head back at your admission, “fuck, pretty, you can’t just say shit like that,” he pushes you down onto your knees, watching in awe as you instantly begin to fumble with his pants, tugging them down. you watch with wide eyes at the sight of his half hard dick sitting beneath his boxers, placing a kiss against the length through the fabric.
“don’t tease me, pretty girl,” jake warns, his tone conveying all the punishments you’d receive for disobeying him. “yes, sir,” you reply, the words going straight to jake’s cock as it hardens in your grasp. “say that again,” he groans, watching your tiny hand as you’re barely able to wrap all the way around his girth.
“say what again? sir?” you watch his cock twitch in your hand, the sight bringing a smirk to your face, kitten licking his tip before placing a delicate kiss on his slit. “you’re so big, sir, i don’t know if you’re gonna fit in my mouth…” you look up at him, blinking your eyes innocently.
you watch as his eyes darken at your actions, “i’ll make it fit, angel,” he presses on the back of your head, guiding you to take his length in your mouth. you slide down, his long cock pressing into the back of your throat harshly, the girth of it stretching your mouth out. “fuck, look at you– you were made to take my cock like this.” jake groans as he watches you suck him in, “my cock.” he reiterates and you nod around his length, continuing to bob up and down before jake takes control, fucking your face.
you begin to drool around his length as you let him use your mouth for his own pleasure, “fuck, baby, taking me so well– letting me fuck your throat like this, you’d let me do anything to this perfect body, wouldn’t you?” he doesn’t need a reply, already knowing the answer as he admires the way your lips stretch around his length, the sight stirring a feeling deep in his stomach. jake thinks you look gorgeous like this, gazing up at him with wide eyes and a hungry gaze, somehow taking his cock deeper every time.
his tip hits the back of your throat repeatedly as jake fucks your face, chasing his high. you keep your mouth slacked, his girth and length making you feel completely stuffed, “look at these tits,” jake watches your tits bounce beneath your tank top, “fuck, you’re perfect,” jake groans as you reach down and squeeze his balls with one of your hands, the other gripping his thigh to keep yourself upright as you sit back on your haunches.
“i’m gonna cum down that gorgeous throat,” jake babbles, even his mindless near-orgasm ramblings sound like music to your ears. he yanks you back and forth along his length a few more times before shoving your face against his pelvic bone, nose smushing against the space right above the base of his dick. you groan at the feeling of his cum hitting the back of your throat, “take it all like the dirty slut you are,” jake commands, pulling away from your mouth slowly after his balls are empty, watching you with a lazy gaze. “swallow.” you follow his instructions promptly, gulping down before sticking your tongue out for him to examine, the sight nearly making him hard again. “good fucking girl,” he praises you, tugging you up off of your knees to meet your lips in a searing kiss.
you groan realizing jake is tasting himself on your lips, the fact not seeming to bother the man as he pushes his tongue into your mouth hungrily, large hands holding your face possessively. “mine,” he whispers against your lips, feeling as you nod in response. “thank you, baby.” he presses one last, gentle kiss against your waiting lips as he tucks himself back into his jeans. “let me make you feel good, too.”
you shake your head, resting both of your hands on his chest, a yawn rising from deep in your belly, “i’m okay, jakey,” you offer him a smile, “tired all of a sudden.” 
“come on, i’ll take you home.”
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“i missed you,” wonyoung smiles as the two of you sit together in the library, “feels like that damn flu took me out for fifty years,” she exaggerates, giggling lightly as she sips on her coffee through a small blue straw.
“i know. you’ve missed… a lot.” you cover your face, embarrassment already heating your cheeks. “i… jake and i are sleeping together.”
wonyoung squeals and you glance around worryingly, watching as other students glare at the two of you. you smile in apology, turning to wonyoung and smacking her arm, to which she exclaims a small, “ow!”
“why are you hitting me? this is so exciting!” she whisper yells.
you shake your head, “i mean, yeah it’s exciting, kind of…” you sigh before meeting her gaze, “he doesn’t… it’s… he made it clear that this is a no strings attached kind of situation.”
wonyoung’s eyes go wide, “you’re lying!” you shake your head as her expression shows how much of a hard time she is having trying to process this information. “i– and you agreed to that?”
you nod, shame dusting your face and ears in a deep pink hue, “i just… i couldn’t say no, he had just finished fucking the brains out of my skull, and i think i’m just desperate to have him around in any way that i can… even if it means hurting myself in the process.”
“my poor y/nnie… he still doesn’t know you like him?” you shake your head, to which wonyoung sighs, “it’s been so long, why don’t you just tell him? what’s the worst that could happen?”
“you know exactly what could happen, wony. i could fuck up years of a friendly-ish relationship, and double fuck up the situation we have now. feelings just get in the way of everything.”
wonyoung places her hand atop yours on the table, rubbing the back of your hand in a soothing motion, “well, whatever you decide, it will all turn out okay. i promise. i don’t think jake would ever hurt you on purpose.”
you inhale deeply at the thought of jake caring about you on more than a surface level. “don’t say that, don’t get my hopes up… it’s just gonna hurt more when everything ends up exploding in my face.”
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you don’t know how jake convinced you to go to the library with him, citing something about how you’ve been sucking in class these days and he needed to make sure you were studying so that he still had someone to compete against. which was a lie, you were doing just fine in class recently.
you’re absolutely trying to study, but feeling jake beside you makes it an impossible feat. your eyes skim over the digital textbook on your laptop in front of you as jake zones out at random areas of the room, every once in a while his eyes landing on you as he stares for a beat before allowing his eyes to wander around the room once more.
jake’s leg is bouncing up and down as the two of you sit side by side, tapping a pattern on his jeans as he struggles to focus. you eye him up with a confused stare, “what is it?”
jake pulls his bottom lip between his teeth, the sight sending heat straight to your core. “you don’t wanna know, baby.”
his response has a strange bout of confidence sprouting inside your tummy. your hand rises to meet him, rubbing and squeezing on his inner thigh, scarily close to his dick that’s getting harder by the second, “you don’t wanna do that, angel.” jake warns, watching you with a dark gaze. you can see the lust fluttering through his irises, dark and intoxicatingly addictive. you move up to his clothed bulge, giving him a feather light squeeze. jake bites back a groan, his head tipping back as his eyes flutter shut in an attempt to keep his composure. he leans over to whisper in your ear. you can feel his breath on your neck sending shivers up your spine.
“stop, or i’ll bend you over this table right now and fuck you in front of everyone here.”
you gasp in response, grinning as you watch him with a mischievous look in your eye, one that he’s come to quickly recognize since agreeing to your… special relationship.
jake pulls back, his stare darker than moments before and you feel yourself falling into his brown eyes, pupils wide and staring at you as lust dances across his irises. “last chance to back out, angel.”
you shake your head lightly before jake rises, packing both bags in a hurry, tugging you out of the library and heading to your apartment building. “your apartment better be empty, or else wonyoung might get a free show.”
“oh my god, jake,” you’re barely able to keep up with him as he drags you along with him, nearly stumbling over your own feet to keep up. you enter your lobby, leading him to your first floor room and unlocking the door hastily. the moment he’s inside the foyer of your apartment, jake is shoving you up against the door, his lips finding yours instantly. “trying to work me up in front of everyone, baby?” he purrs, one hand cupping your face gently while the other has a searing grip on your hips. every spot he touches burns, watching him with affection in your gaze. “too needy to wait until later, huh?”
you nod dumbly, covering the hand against your cheek with your own, nuzzling against it as you try to hide your growing shame at being so insatiable that you couldn’t even be in public with him for more than thirty minutes before jumping his bones.
“oh, my pretty girl’s all shy now that we’re home? what happened to that brat attitude from before?” jake kisses the back of his teeth before placing a closed mouth kiss on your pouty lips. you hide from his gaze, embarrassed at your bratty behavior from before. “‘m sorry, sir.”
jake nearly moans hearing you use the name he heard for the first time just days before in the bathroom when you sucked his soul out through his dick. he pulls you close in another passionate, messy kiss. “yeah? baby’s sorry?” you nod, watching him with wide, innocent eyes, not seeing the wheels turning in his head as he watches your tiny figure with glee.
jake walks you through the hallway, lips wandering and planting kisses on every bit of exposed skin on your upper half. you lead him to your door, twisting the handle quickly before stumbling inside. jake shuts the door with his foot as he backs you up onto your bed. “i think my baby deserves a punishment.”
jake presses further against your lips, his hands sliding up your frame to hold your tits gently, “could play with these all day,” he mumbles, kneading them in his large hands. you kiss him back slowly, feeling the tension from the past few days dissipate the further he pulls you in, losing yourself in the feeling of his soft lips dancing against yours.
jake smiles as he gives each breast one final squeeze before pulling your sweatshirt over your head, “had i known you were bare under here, baby…” jake sucks harshly on your nipple, your back arching up against his mouth, begging for more.
“you’re lucky i didn’t bend you over that table,” he bites at your breast, leaving a teeth mark on the side of the plump flesh. “everyone would learn fast who you belong to, wouldn’t they?”
you nod, moaning out as he continues his onslaught against your nipple, sucking and biting with fervor, his cock standing tall and proud in his sweatpants.
“you wore those on purpose,” you squeak out between loud moans.
“what? these?” jake motions to the gray sweatpants covering his strong legs, “didn’t know they’d affect you so much, would’ve worn them way sooner if i knew you’d pounce on me like the little slut you are.” he guides your hand to the crotch of his pants, allowing you to squeeze his length through the fabric of his sweats. more wetness gushes out of you at the feeling of the weight of his member, knowing all the damage he can do to you with it. “my little slut, isn’t that right?” you nod diligently, rubbing up and down on his length, trying to rile him up.
jake halts your actions, “naughty whore, can’t even be patient,” he scolds, leading your hand to dip under his waistband. you gasp at the feeling of him not wearing any boxers, allowing you to hold him in your hand, warmth spreading through your body as you jack him off lazily.
jake pulls his sweats down just below the base of his dick and it springs free, hard and ready for you. “fuck–” you groan, watching closely as your hand continues its diligent motions. “love your cock, sir.”
“i know you do, baby,” jake pets your hair gently, “such a good little cock slut, always ready to take me,” he dips his other hand beneath the waistband of your sweats, pushing his hands through your folds. “already this wet and i’ve barely even touched you.”
“just for you,” you groan as he dips one finger inside, pumping roughly, searching for that spongy spot inside of you. jake slips another finger inside, his movements quickening as he listens for the gorgeous noises he loves to hear spill from your lips.
“pull these down,” jake commands and you use your free hand to tug your pants and panties down and off your legs. jake can feel himself salivating at the sight of your gorgeous pussy, slipping a third finger inside next to the other two. he buries them knuckle deep before pulling out, repeating his actions over and over as he watches your facial expressions convey the pleasure he’s bringing you. “fuck, look at you, weak for me and i’m only using my fingers,” the commanding tone in his voice makes you shiver, eyes fluttering open to meet his gaze, dark and swimming with lust. “fuck, jake–” you groan as you feel his fingers begin to reach deeper, your pussy nearly swallowing his hand to the knuckles each time.
“look at how i’ve stretched this tiny pussy out,” jake chuckles, his voice rumbling with need as he glances down at his cock where you’ve halted your handjob, back arching off the bed. he removes his fingers promptly, causing you to whine loudly.
“sir, please–” you plead, eyes brimming with tears, “was so close! i’ll be a good girl!”
jake watches you with amusement, the sight of you whimpering beneath him forcing his brain into overdrive, “good girls do as they’re told. keep jacking me off and if you stop again i won’t let you cum.” you nod at his words, resuming your actions, groaning as you pay extra attention to his leaky red tip, squeezing harder every time you reach the top.
jake dips three fingers back inside you, watching as you squeak out and start panting as he hits a particular spongy spot inside of you. jackpot.
he assaults this spot, other hand snaking down to rub mercilessly at your clit. jake groans as your grip on him becomes tighter as you near your high, “gonna make a mess on my fingers like the good girl you are?”
you nod quickly, mouth hanging slack with your tongue lolling out as you squeak at every jab against your g-spot. “f– f– u– uck–” you scream out between thrusts, your pace on his dick speeding up as you approach the edge. 
with one particularly tight yank of his dick and a swipe over his tip, jake cums hard, liquid spurting out onto your chest and some on your gaping hole. he stills his actions for a moment before coating fingers on both of his hands with his seed. you feel his cum inside you, tears flowing at the onslaught of varying sensations on you at once. his other hand returns to your clit, his lips coming to suck on it as he rubs roughly, while still fucking you with his long, slender fingers.
“ahh!–” you scream out, back arching off the bed as the coil inside you threatens to snap, “fuck! jake–” a slap against your clit followed by a harsh suck of the hardened bud causes you to tumble past your precipice, all of your limbs stilling as jake never halts his actions. he pulls away from your clit to look down. the sight of you cumming, liquid spilling everywhere makes his cock jump, “fuuuuuck, baby,” he continues ramming his fingers inside of you with expert precision, “such a messy girl.”
his words bring a burning sensation to your cheeks, trying to scramble away from jake as he overstimulates you heavily, never ceasing his actions, “jake, please–”
“you’ve got one more in you, baby,” jake tells you, “let jake help you.”
jake removes his fingers before sliding home, his thick cock reaching impossibly deep inside you instantly, sucking him in with familiarity and a still present stretch from the sheer size of him. “fuck, your pussy is heaven sent, angel,” jake’s need overtakes him, jackhammering inside of you harshly, your body jerking with each thrust inside of your already abused hole. he snakes a hand around, holding your asscheeks apart with both hands, lightly tracing a finger around the rim of your asshole. “ahh!–” you gasp at the intrusion, “jake!–”
“this belongs to me, too,” jake tells you, slowly pushing the pad of his finger past your puckered ring, “jake!” you scream, eyes rolling back at the feeling of being double stuffed, even with just a bit of his finger breaching your ass.
“i knew you’d be a slut for anal,” jake whispers as his pounding continues, finger slowly pushing further in through your backdoor, “i’ll hit it from the back next time, how about that, my dirty girl?”
you shake your head, your body’s reaction saying the opposite as jake starts to pump his finger in and out of your tight hole in rhythm with the way his cock is pounding your pussy. “moremoremore!”
“yeah baby? more?” jake shoves his finger further, picking up speed in both holes, nearly cumming seeing the bruise already forming on your plush breast from the searing bite he gave it earlier, the imprint of his teeth visible even from a distance. jake uses his free hand to squeeze your throat tightly, “greedy little cock slut always needs more, can’t just take what she’s given.”
your vision starts to go white from the pressure on your windpipe combined with jake’s dick hitting your spongy spot and his finger pumping knuckle deep into your ass, knowing he’s the only one who’s ever been there. your eyes roll back into your head as you cum, the experience feeling different from any other time you’ve orgasmed.
“you trying to make me cum right now? squirting on me like that, baby?” more liquid continues to gush out of your hole, the wetness on jake’s dick making him groan loudly. he pulls his finger from your ass when the liquid is done streaming from your weeping cunt, smacking your ass harshly and groping at your cheek. “next time, i’m fucking this ass.” he gives you another rough smack, this time on the opposite side, before pulling out of you. “right now? i’m gonna fuck these tits.” jake crawls up your body sliding his dick between your plush mounds of flesh, squeezing them tight around his length. “look at you, letting me use this fucking perfect body however i need,” jake groans, pinching your nipple with one of his hands as he pumps in and out, eyes trained on the way your tits nearly completely cover his length. he chases his high, knowing you’re not anticipating his next actions, your eyes fighting to stay open as he uses you as he pleases.
“fuck, you’re perfect,” jake whispers, teetering on the edge of cumming before he slides away from your tits, shoving his length back into your gaping pussy. a few pumps is all it takes before he’s spilling inside of you, cum hitting your walls in long spurts and filling your pussy, dripping out of you and landing on the sheets beneath you. jake fucks you through his orgasm, pushing two fingers into your mouth before rubbing your abused clit with precision.
“no!– no more, jake!–” you try to push him away, overstimulation tingling around your body after two mind blowing orgasms have already rendered you utterly exhausted.
“your body’s telling me otherwise,” jake smirks, feeling your pussy tighten around him with every pump of his cock and flick of your hardened nub, “gonna give you one more, angel. you can do it.”
you argue against him, the little whimpers leaving your mouth betraying your actions. you scream loudly as the wave of pleasure washes over you, and still jake fucks you through it, his movements never ceasing. you still as it wrecks through you, orgasm finally subsiding as jake pulls out of you slowly, hands running up the sides of your body gently, holding you like you’ll break if he presses too hard. he traces the curves of your body with admiration, wondering how he got so fucking lucky to have you beneath him.
“look at my pretty girl.” he smiles as he watches you return to the land of the living, your mind spinning after three orgasms. jake leans over your body, placing gentle kisses all over your face and neck, littering your body with affection. “did so good for me, angel. such a good girl.” you smile as his words register in your ears, the ringing in them finally leaving as your body returns to its natural state of relaxation.
“no more, please,” you beg.
jake nods, offering you a smile, one that neither of you realize has hidden feelings brewing behind it. “no more, promise. my baby did so good.” he stands on the side of the bed, picking you up and leading you to the bathroom. jake sits you on the counter and starts running water, testing the temperature for you before corking the tub and watching it fill with perfectly hot water.
“mmm– jakey,” you mumble.
he turns to you, standing between your legs, rubbing circles on your kneecaps as he watches your drooping eyes try to focus on his face. “still with me, angel?” you nod lightly as he places a kiss on your forehead. “good, gonna get you all cleaned up and then we’ll get some sleep, okay?” you nod again.
jake sits there for a moment, memorizing the lines of your face and the feeling of your soft skin beneath his fingertips. he turns and stops the water from running. “come here, beautiful,” jake lifts you up again and places you into the tub. you sit there, mind still fuzzy, watching the ceiling lights reflect against the surface of the water. jake tugs his shirt off before sliding in behind you, letting your back rest against his chest.
jake grabs your body wash, lathering it between his hands before he gently spreads the bubbles across your body, diligently scrubbing your tired body clean.
“thank you,” you mumble, leaning the crown of your head back against his chest to look up at him, “of course, angel.” he kisses your forehead and you smile at the action, feeling him rinsing the soap from your skin before your eyes flutter shut for a moment.
the sight of you falling asleep against jake gives him a warm feeling in his stomach.
he washes up quickly, trying to not disturb your sleeping form. jake uncorks the bath and stands, reaching for the nearby towel before helping you to your feet. he dries himself quickly after realizing there’s only one towel, and then he’s wrapping you in it and guiding you to step out of the tub, your eyes still conveying how tired you are. jake tugs on his sweats before stepping back into your bedroom, digging through your drawers for clean clothes. he finds a suitable sleep set and a clean pair of panties before returning to your exhausted form standing still in the bathroom, leaning against the countertop.
“alright pretty,” he guides your legs to step into your panties, pulling them up your legs slowly before following them with a pair of shorts, “did so good for me, baby.” he reassures your tired mind, placing a gentle kiss on your hip after pulling the shorts up to rest on your waist.
jake finishes drying off your top half before tugging the shirt he picked out over your frame, helping you get your arms into the holes. once you’re fully dressed, he watches you with an unknown emotion stirring deep inside his body. “nap time,” he offers you a smile before leading you back to your bed, making note to wash your cum covered sheets later once the two of you wake up again. he lays you down on top of your comforter to keep a barrier between the stained sheets and your freshly washed body, crossing the room to grab a throw blanket and placing it on top of you. jake sneaks in behind you, wrapping his arms around your center and resting his head on your shoulder, breathing in your fresh scent, a smell that brings a sense of peace to his otherwise busy mind.
“get some sleep,” jake kisses your cheek then your shoulder before returning his head to the place it feels most comfortable.
“goodnight, angel.”
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you slide through the front door of the frat house the next day, watching as yet another party unfolds before your eyes. you glance around, looking for heeseung or jay, or even sunghoon, knowing jake would reveal himself later in the evening when he got tired of watching you walk around in the tiniest skirt known to man, one you wore purposely just to rile him up.
you pass by a few aquaintances as you continue your search, greeting them kindly, stopping for small talk. the hallways reveal none of the men you’re looking for as you glance down the endless expanse of random doors that line the walls. you stand at the bottom of the stairs, about to head up before you see two people nearly fucking on the top of the steps, causing you to turn around and head back towards the living room.
you walk out into the backyard, finding sunghoon talking with someone near the side of the house, beginning to approach them before you stop. their hushed voices reach your ears as a distinct accent hits you.
“there’s no way you don’t like her, man, i’ve seen the way you look at her.”
“sunghoon,” jake warns, “i don’t like y/n, bro. she means nothing to me, seriously. drop it.”
you feel your heart shatter beneath your ribcage, pieces scattering out and stabbing themselves into your organs as you step back into the house, bumping into someone who catches you before you can tumble to the ground.
“y/n, you okay?” heeseung asks as he watches you, searching your face.
“i– i’m fine heeseung,” you try to wrestle from his hold, “please let me go,” you whimper, tears sliding down your cheeks pathetically, trying to hide your embarrassed face from the tall man.
heeseung drags you into the kitchen, thankfully empty of jay’s usual presence, and he lifts you to sit you down on the counter, the cold surface against your bare legs grounding you the slightest bit. “what’s wrong? do i need to call wonyoung?”
you shake your head, burying your face in your hands, sobs racking your entire body. “i’m so stupid,” you explain between tears, “i shouldn’t have been eavesdropping, i really didn’t mean to, but i heard jake talking about me with sunghoon and i–” you whimper audibly, wiping your eyes with your forearm as you look up at heeseung, who is watching you closely. “i like him so much, heeseung, i have for so long, and he said i didn’t even mean anything to him, and now i feel so fucking embarrassed!” you ramble, your mind feeling fuzzy as you try to fight the tears continuing to tumble down your cheeks, “ever since jay’s birthday party he’s been treating me different, and sometimes i guess i had tricked myself into thinking he might like me back… he– he says the sweetest things whenever we have sex, and treats me so gentle after and calls me all these nicknames… i guess he just says that shit to every girl he manages to get in his bed,” your crying has slowed, anger beginning to mix with sadness as your emotions shift slightly.
“i can’t believe i actually went along with his dumb idea,” you scold yourself, “i’m seriously so stupid.”
you can’t believe you wanted so desperately for jake to return your feelings that you let him use you, believing that maybe, just maybe, he felt the same way you did. and he shoved your hope right back in your face just to taunt you with it.
god, this is useless.
you’re useless, your brain reminds you.
maybe jake had a point in using you for his own pleasure. he has never once shown you any romantic interest before you agreed to a change in your relationship dynamic, so why would anything change suddenly at the drop of a hat?
why would you think you’d ever be enough for him?
you shake your head, eyes brimming with more tears at the memory of allowing him to use you without question, wondering if you even meant anything at all to jake, sexually or otherwise. how had your crush gotten so bad that you’d let a man devour you and rip you apart just to leave you to pick up the pieces yourself? the sim jaeyun you found yourself crushing on was leagues different than the man you just overheard, and you felt your stomach sink at the thought of the boy you once knew becoming barely recognizable.
“y/n,” heeseung’s voice brings you out of the fog, “y/n, it’s okay, you’re not stupid.” he wraps you in a tight hug, the tears returning as you soak the shoulder of his shirt. “jake’s stupid if he doesn’t realize what a catch you are, pretty.” he rubs your back gently.
“everything okay in here?”
“not now,” heeseung attempts to shoo jake away, to which the australian boy stands still, watching with confusion. “jake, seriously, go away.”
heeseung stumbles as jake shoves him lightly, “what the fuck did you do, man!”
“what you should be asking is what the fuck did you do, jake,” heeseung glares at him, watching his best friend nearly fuck up everything he doesn’t know he’s been longing for this whole time.
jake lets heeseung’s words slip past him, turning to you, eyes lined with concern, “you okay?”
you watch jake, tears still slowly sliding down your red cheeks, shaking your head, “leave me alone, sim.” the venom in your tone tears at his heart, watery gaze watching him with hatred brewing in his heart, “don’t pretend like you care about me.”
“i–”
“jake, leave before something worse happens,” heeseung advises him, holding back the words he actually wants to say to his helplessly blind and stupid best friend. jake obeys, walking slowly out of the kitchen with one last glance at you, the sight of you crying into heeseung’s hold nearly breaking him in two.
oh fuck.
the tidal wave of emotions hits jake all at once, feelings he’s unknowingly denied since you first met all those years ago beginning to settle into his gaze, watching you with hurt at the way you pushed him away with your words.
heeseung pulls jay into the kitchen as he’s walking by, instructing him to take care of you. heeseung approaches jake, who is standing right outside the kitchen and tugs him further into the house, away from you and your sad eyes. “jake, what the fuck dude!”
“i didn’t do anything!” he fights back.
“why the hell would you say that shit about her to hoon!”
realization dawns on him, bringing jake to rub a tired hand against his face, “god, she heard me, didn’t she?” jake asks sheepishly, to which heeseung hits him in the shoulder, saying “yes, you idiot!”
“fuck…” jake sighs deeply, looking up at heeseung, “i really fucked up, didn’t i?”
“yes, dummy!”
jake pinches the bridge of his nose, biting his lower lip out of frustration, “if i was her i’d hate me right now.”
“did you actually mean all that shit you said?”
“i– i didn’t really think much about what we were doing, but hoon was grilling me and saying all this shit like he always does and i just wanted him to shut the hell up, he was overwhelming me with all his stupid questions,” jake shakes his head, frustration brewing in his stomach.
“you like her, don’t you?” jake doesn’t meet heeseung’s eyes, only nodding and sighing deeply, “i didn’t think i did, but seeing her push me away like that made me so sad, dude. i don’t want her to hate me…”
“sometimes you’re stupid, jake,” heeseung places his hands on his shoulders, “just go, man. sleep it off and give her some space. you broke her damn heart, dude.”
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you wake up in an unfamiliar bed, glancing around before realizing you’re still in the frat house. “good morning, sunshine,” sunghoon smiles at you as he exits the bathroom, “about time you woke up.”
“sunghoon… what the hell happened last night?” your mind is running a mile a minute, praying you didn’t sleep with jake’s best friend.
“there was no funny business, don’t worry your pretty little head about that,” he reassures you, “heeseung brought you here after you nearly cried yourself into a coma in the kitchen.”
you rub at your eyes, sighing loudly as the night’s events wash over you suddenly. “jake’s not here, is he?”
sunghoon shakes his head, “no, he’s not here, so don’t freak out.”
you sigh loudly, “are jay and heeseung here?” sunghoon nods in response, “yeah, jay’s probably cooking something up for you right now.”
“morning, sleeping beauty,” jay greets you as you stumble into the kitchen, the clothes against your skin meant for a much larger frame as you nearly trip over the extra fabric hanging off the bottom of your sweatpants, the legs too long for your shorter body. these must be heeseung’s…
“hi,” you return the greeting, sliding up to sit at a barstool at the island. “is… are you guys okay?”
“us?” jay questions, glancing back at you from his spot at the stove where he’s frying two eggs for you, “i should be asking how you are, y/n.”
“i– i don’t know, honestly. my head really hurts.” jay nods his head towards the end of the island, “heeseung left some ibuprofen out for you.”
you take it, mentally noting to thank him later. “how are you feeling about… everything you heard?” jay questions, trying to choose his words carefully.
“i– he really hurt me, jay.” jay can hear the sniffle in your voice, mentally cursing out his best friend for being so damn blind to his own feelings this whole time. “i don’t… i don’t think i’m gonna go to class today. i can’t face him right now.” your voice is small, your spirit broken from what you overheard last night, knowing all of this, all of you, everything the two of you experienced together and made each other feel, truly meant nothing to him.
“eat up,” jay presents your plate to you. “how’d you know how i like my eggs?”
jay shrugs, grinning, “lucky guess,” he lies easily, knowing now wouldn’t be the right time to tell you that jake gave all six of his close friends a rundown on your favorite and most hated foods after getting plastered one night a few weeks ago.
heeseung ends up driving you back to your apartment, despite protests that it’s close enough to walk. he drops you off, making you promise to eat lunch at the least.
you spend the day lying in bed, alternating between crying until you can feel your chest heaving and a dryness in your eyes from having already cried all the liquid out of your body, to taking intermittent naps, snuggling under your blanket, grasping it tightly for any semblance of stability.
of all the people he chose to hurt, it had to be you. you, the person who has been with him through many stages of life, competing closely with him and hiding your feelings from the first day that you met. the doe eyed boy you met all those years ago felt like a distant memory from the man who decided to control your life and mind, using you for his own gain and tossing you aside when he felt it was fitting.
oh the things you’d do to forget you ever met sim jaeyun.
the next day you drag yourself out of bed, attempting to at least look presentable before stumbling into class, walking to the back and sitting next to riki, not daring to even glance in jake’s direction. riki greets you with a slight nod of his head and you offer him a small smile, the most genuine one you can muster up, for him not forcing you to speak. you know your voice will betray you, and the minute you start speaking you’ll cry instantly.
jake can’t stop looking back at you, his heart breaking every time he sees the frown etched into your features, brows tugged down and lips curling into the opposite of what he wants to see. he tries to catch your gaze, but you avoid him completely, “can he stop looking back here,” you mumble, pulling a small chuckle from riki’s lips. “don’t pay him any mind, y/n.”
the class goes by agonizingly slow, each pointed glance in your direction from jake tearing the pieces of your heart further apart. you ignore him time after time until the professor dismisses you, and you turn to riki with pleading eyes. “can i… can i walk out with you?”
“of course,” riki’s kindness makes your gloomy day a little bit brighter as he gathers his things and leads you out of the classroom, using the door furthest from jake. jake watches you leave, sighing deeply, hoping you won’t avoid him forever.
you walk into your next class with jake a minute late, glancing around to see all the seats taken besides your usual one beside the man you’d like to see the least right now. you set your things down gently and take your seat, watching the professor as they drone on about the lesson. you will your brain to focus on the lecture, but the presence beside you is causing a thumping in your skull and a buzz in your bones. jake keeps stealing glances at your profile, watching and holding himself back from reaching out to touch you gently, to calm the leg that you’re shaking beneath your desk.
you spend the period zoning out, not even caring when the teacher hands out the tests from last week, a high score sitting atop your worksheet. jake watches as you pick the paper up, seeing that he’s lost to you again. the realization doesn’t bring him anger or a competitive drive today, no, it brings him an immense feeling of being lost. jake thinks he’s lost apart of himself when you started ignoring him, and he knows it’s his own fault, vowing to heeseung that he’d fix what he broke between the two of you
you leave the classroom as quickly as humanly possible, hoping to escape without jake catching you. “y/n, please, can we talk?” he questions after catching your wrist in his grasp in the hallway.
you shake your head, watching him with a teary gaze, unable to even squeak out all the things you want to say to him. you want to curse him for ever making you fall for him completely. you urge to reach out and pound your fists against his chest, knowing he’s not hurting the way you are. you want to cry in front of him, making him watch to see how he’s broken you down to the lowest version of yourself. but you don’t want to give him the satisfaction of any of these reactions, knowing he’d love to see you suffering because of him, knowing he played you just the exact way he planned to.
you yank your hand away from his grip, the skin burning after you rip it from his grasp. you leave as fast as your exhausted, beat down body can carry you, opting to skip the rest of the day’s obligations.
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“y/n, here,” wonyoung perches herself on the side of your bed, “i brought you some ramen, heeseung dropped it off for you, said it’s his favorite brand.” heeseung had omitted the fact that this brand is actually jake’s favorite and not his, the sneaky bastard. she smiles as she presents the bowl to you, with some fresh toppings she obviously adding sitting atop the broth and noodle mixture.
“thanks, wony,” you take a bite, groaning at the taste, “this is so good.”
“good,” she watches you eat with worried eyes, “how are you feeling?”
you swallow your bite before looking up at her, “a little better, i guess.”
wonyoung offers you a weak smile, knowing it’s killing her inside to see you going through this situation with jake. “are you going to your next class?” she questions, hoping you’ll say yes, knowing your grades will start to be affected if you keep skipping the way you have the past few days. she also knows all too well that no man is worth jeopardizing your future over, no matter how long you’ve liked him.
you nod, slurping up the bowl’s contents with speed, “yeah, my professor emailed and asked if i was okay, and i don’t want to worry her any further.”
wonyoung nods in approval at your response, “good. just ignore him the whole time, okay?” to which you nod, gulping down the rest of your broth.
you approach your next class feeling a bit better after eating the meal wonyoung so generously made for you, even if ramen is quick and easy to make, she really didn’t have to care for you the way she did time and time again.
you feel a tug on your arm as someone tugs you in the opposite direction of the place you were heading to, pulling the both of you inside an empty classroom and blocking the exit.
you look up to see jake watching you, his eyes less bright than they usually appear to be, the spark you see whenever he’s hellbent on beating you seemingly absent from his gaze.
“please don’t,” you beg him, not wanting to hear him gloat or whatever the hell he’s planning to do here.
“y/n, please,” jake begs, eyes searching your face for some kind of reassurance that you wouldn’t leave, “please, i need to apologize.”
“you don’t have anything to apologize for,” you lie straight through your teeth, “so can i please just leave?”
jake’s pleading voice is slowly breaking down your resolve, “please, can i at least explain?” when you don’t answer, he takes the opportunity to start laying his feelings out on the table.
“whatever you heard me say, i know it sounded horrible, but i didn’t mean it.”
“oh, so you didn’t mean that i meant nothing to you?” he winces at the words that you throw back in his face, knowing that was one of the worst things he could’ve said.
“no, i didn’t mean it,” jake tells you, gaze piercing yours, “i– i was stupid, y/n, you have to believe me. i only said that to get sunghoon to back off, of course i care about you. i’ve spent how many years by your side? and you think i would actually hate you?”
the words ring in your ears, making your head hurt as you continue to listen to him. “i’m so sorry, y/n, i really am. sunghoon wouldn’t leave me alone and i just wanted him to shut up for once.” jake rubs his hands over his face, breathing a deep sigh against his palms before shoving them back into his jacket pockets, gaze meeting yours again. “when we started messing around… i didn’t know how i felt… i thought it was just fun. but every time i saw you i felt weird, and i didn’t know what it meant, i figured it was normal because we’ve been rivals for so long and i’ve always felt this drive to be better than you. but it started feeling different… i started to just want to be around you all the time, whether we were fucking or not, and i kept denying it to everyone who would ask me.”
jake’s mind flashes back to the countless times sunghoon has harassed him, asking when he’s going to confess to you. “i don’t know when i realized it, but i like you, y/n. i guess i have this whole time, and i’m so sorry i made you think that i didn’t.” he resists the urge to reach out and hold your hand in his, knowing the physical touch would likely only bring him comfort, versus the intent being to ground you as well. “i… i really fucked up, i shouldn’t have asked you to be in a friends with benefits relationship, i should’ve known that’s not what you wanted. i’m sorry if you ever felt like i was using you, i… i’m sorry i didn’t realize my feelings sooner.”
jake’s speech knocks the wind out of you as you stare at him blankly, tears brewing in your eyes, “jake, i–” you mumble, mind swimming at his admission. “thank you for apologizing, i– i think i need some time, if that’s okay.” he nods quickly in response, the action warming you up inside.
“take all the time you need. what i just said is a lot, and it’s okay if you don’t forgive me. i just needed to tell you before i lost you forever.”
“i– i’ll talk to you later okay?” jake nods, moving out of the way of the door, watching you walk away. anxiety brews in his gut as he hopes with his entire being that you’ll forgive him, even though deep down he wonders if he even deserves an ounce of forgiveness.
jake concludes that he doesn’t deserve your forgiveness, that he’s royally fucked up and he’s determined to fix what he’s broken between the two of you.
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you let your emotions brew for a few days, jake choosing to give you space during class and every other time you find yourself near him. relief washes over you every time you see him and he doesn’t rush to your side, knowing the simple action would just further complicate the already confusing thoughts in your mind.
you’re still obviously hurt by what he said, jake’s words creating a hole in your heart feeling like you wasted so much time loving someone and hoping to be loved back, even agreeing to a relationship you knew you couldn’t handle without your emotions getting in the way somehow.
the sincerity of his apology and the fear in his eyes when he explained everything to you still remains in your mind, all the positive memories you have with jake sitting in the forefront of your consciousness. you are itching to forgive him, but the fear of him breaking your heart again rings through your mind with every passing thought.
you’ve made a decision in your head, praying it’s the right one, not wanting to get burned again.
“can i talk to you?”
jake nods his head, bidding his friend goodbye as he follows you through campus. you stop at a bench near the fountain by the engineering building, watching as the water spouts up in a gorgeous display, zoning out for a minute. jake waits patiently for you to speak as he takes a seat next to you.
“jake,” you turn to look at him, “i… i accept your apology.” jake’s eyes light up at your admission, “i know feelings are complicated, mine certainly are right now, i just– did you know the whole time how much i liked you?”
jake shakes his head, “no, y/n, i wouldn’t put you through that on purpose, i promise.”
you nod in response, watching your hands that are clasped together in your lap for a moment before looking back up at him. “i– do you really like me? you promise you’re not lying?”
jake nods, reaching out to take your hand in his, giving it a small squeeze, “no lies, i promise.”
“what… where do we go from here?”
jake thinks for a moment, not prepared for the question, before sucking in a breath and asking, “how about i take you out on a real date?”
he catches you off guard with his question, “yeah?” he nods, “yeah, pretty. i meant everything i said, i don’t want you to slip away when you mean so much to me… it just took me an embarrassingly long time to realize how absolutely infatuated with you i am.”
his last sentence makes you embarrassed and you attempt to hide your burning cheeks, knowing your ears are betraying you with the tips turning red. “okay, sim, you can take me on a date.” jake’s eyes sparkle at your agreement, relief crashing over his body in an overwhelming display. you smile at the way his eyes shine as he watches you, feeling contentment settle into your heart, as if he’s putting the broken pieces back together slowly, fixing what he accidentally broke inside you.
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“jake, where are you taking me?” you question, brow quirked as the man you’ve wanted for so long stands before you, leaning against his sleek red car. the sight of him waiting so casually, eyes trained off at something in the distance, makes your heart flutter.
“hi, beautiful,” jake greets you, grabbing your hand and raising it above your head, guiding you to do a spin for him as he appreciates your outfit. “you look gorgeous, angel.”
“you don’t look so bad yourself, handsome.” you smile at jake as he leads you to the passenger side, opening the door for you and helping you inside. he steps over and takes his seat on the driver’s side, the engine revving to life with the press of a button. “where are we heading?"
jake uses his left hand to steer, the right resting on the gear shift as he takes the two of you off campus, being extra careful as his car now has precious cargo inside. “it’s a surprise,” the midday sun beams down on the two of you as he turns into a neighborhood. you watch his face, appreciating every feature that you’ve admired for years, heart swelling at the thought of the man in front of you reciprocating your feelings.
jake shifts the car into park after a short drive and you look around, taking in the surrounding area. a playground sits in front of you, a small forest sitting a ways behind it, tall trees towering over everything nearby. the sun still cascades through the leaves as jake opens your door, shutting it behind you as you step onto the asphalt of the parking lot surrounding you. he opens his small trunk, pulling a basket out and a small pink and white checkered blanket. you feel a buzz beneath your skin as your eyes sparkle, realizing jake has packed the two of you a picnic lunch for your first date.
jake leads you over to a small patch of grass behind the playground set, the spot having the greenest grass. you wonder if he picked this spot special for the two of you, the possibility of it making your heart soar. he lays the blanket down, flattening it out so no wrinkles are in sight before placing the basket on top and helping you sit down.
“don’t go thinking i’m some master chef now, okay? i had jay help me…” jake says, wanting to hide his face in embarrassment as he pokes fun at himself. you watch as he pulls a variety of dishes out, “but i made some stuff by myself, too!”
this feels strange, but seeing the usually confident and argumentative man you have fought against academically for all these years seemingly doubting himself? it is definitely a different sensation than the ones you’re used to. but the sight made your insides feel fuzzy, butterflies sprouting in your tummy, watching in real time as you feel yourself falling for him even more. “jake, this is lovely,” you place a hand on his arm, his movements halting in response as you reassure him, giving him a light squeeze. “you’re lovely. i’m flattered you did all of this for me.”
“i wanted you to see that i’m serious about this, about us.”
jake takes the plates and bowls out, handing you one, before setting the silverware down in the middle of the blanket. “here, we made some of my favorites and some foods i remember you mentioning over the years… i hope you still like them,” you can hear how nervous he is, “jake, seriously, stop freaking out. it’s just me,” you tell him as he opens one of the glass dishes revealing a bowl of homemade kimchi stew, a dish you know jake has loved for a long time.
“that doesn’t help me,” jake laughs a little at his own embarrassment and nerves, “that’s the whole reason why i’m so nervous… you’re you, and this is my one chance to show you how much i care about you.”
you watch as he opens the next dish, a box of chocolate covered strawberries, “jake,” you glance up, meeting his eyes as you nearly cry at the worried look in them, “i don’t remember the last time i even had these… thank you.”
“i remember you mentioned them sometime in sophomore year,” jake replies sheepishly, scratching at the back of his neck nervously. “holy shit, that makes me sound like such a creep.”
you shake your head, watching jake, “stop it, jake, seriously. i think it’s adorable that you remembered that from so long ago. it’s not weird or creepy!”
jake sees the sincerity in your gaze, letting out a breath of relief, “i… i really like you, seriously, i don’t want to mess up my one chance.”
you grab the sides of jake’s face and gently pull him towards you, capturing his lips in your own, hoping to wash away some of his worries with the action. you feel lighter as you kiss him, his plush, delicate lips feeling like heaven against your own. you missed kissing him, and kissing him now feels so… different. refreshingly so, knowing that the man you’re holding in your arms reciprocates your own feelings that you’ve pushed down and hid from the world for so long.
you pull away after a moment, resting your head against his, “you haven’t messed anything up, jake, okay?”
jake stares into your eyes, his emotions bubbling and growing beneath the surface, watching as he falls more in love with you the longer he watches your gorgeous irises stare back at him, ones that he wouldn’t mind getting lost in. “okay, y/n.” you seal your promise with another kiss, feeling him smile against your lips this time, knowing the man you’re sitting across from is the same one you fell for all those years ago. caring, kind, extremely driven, gorgeous, and above all, captivating in every way, his drive and need to succeed always pushing yourself to be the best version of yourself. and you know his drive to be the best has extended here, going above and beyond to impress you with a sentimental date, the concept of which makes you feel mushy inside.
time passes quickly, conversation and good food flowing between the two of you, giggles and stories being shared, feeling yourself fall further for him the longer you spent by his side. when the sky starts to darken with clouds and the threat of rain, you and jake pack quickly, rushing to the car when raindrops start to fall on your heads. jake drives you both back to campus, the ambience of the water falling on the hood of the car along with the low lull of the radio causing you to fall asleep. jake pulls into his usual parking spot outside his apartment building, picking you up in his arms and setting the picnic basket on your stomach, carrying you to his home, a small studio apartment on the second floor. after somehow unlocking the door without dropping you or waking you up, he sets the picnic basket on the counter before placing you in his bed, tucking you in under his freshly washed blanket. jake busies himself with putting leftovers away as you sleep before coming to join you, sneaking under the covers and spooning you.
jake places a small kiss against the back of your head, watching as your stomach rises and falls peacefully with each quiet breath you take. “sleep well, angel.”
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“i haven’t told the guys yet,” jake’s statement shocks you as the two of you walk into the frat hand in hand, a bustling party happening around you. you couldn’t believe after three successful dates and jake asking you to be his girlfriend, that he has kept that from his friends for all that time. “i wanted to tell them together, so they couldn’t bully me.” he jokes, leading you through the house, looking for his three best friends.
you find the three of them standing at the end of a hallway, near the room where you and jake first hooked up. you blush at the sight, glancing up at your boyfriend who gives you a quick wink. “what’s happening in your pretty little head, angel?”
“nothing,” you smack his arm, attempting to push him forwards to meet his friends, “let’s go talk to them before you or i do something crazy.”
“crazy doesn’t necessarily mean bad, though,” jake teases you before relenting, walking towards his friends who all smile at the sight of the two of you.
“i told you so,” heeseung grins the widest of all before jay and sunghoon’s faces drop suddenly, “pay up, jayhoon.”
“stop fucking calling us that,” sunghoon shoves his friend’s shoulder before fishing a $50 bill out of his wallet, jay doing the same but with a $100. “jay you should just be my sugar daddy at this point,” heeseung smirks as he tucks the bills into the inside pocket of his jacket.
sunghoon scoffs at heeseung’s words, shoving his wallet back into his pocket. “heejay will never be a thing, so keep dreaming.” jay teases before looking at you and jake again, watching as you lean your head against his arm as you continue to hold his hand. “glad you came to your senses, jakey boy… i told you it’d work out, didn’t i, y/n?”
“you didn’t say anything remotely close to those words, jay,” you argue, to which he shrugs, “well, i was going to but then you started hitting me.”
“you were playing twenty questions with me while i was in a crisis!”
“we’re actually… i asked y/n to be my girlfriend last week,” jake scratches the back of his head, “so expect to see her around a lot more.”
“ha!” sunghoon smacks heeseung’s shoulder, “pay up!” he sticks his hands out to the other two men, who promptly give him $20 each.
you watch as the money is exchanged, “how much betting on us did you guys do?”
heeseung smirks at the two of you, “a lot. it’s been happening for longer than either of you will ever know.”
“nobody expected jake to actually man up and ask you to be his girlfriend officially this soon except hoon,” jake smacks heeseung and jay at this admission as you realize the trio has known of your semi secret dating the entire time, “what the hell, guys!”
“doesn’t matter, because it all worked out, didn’t it, lovebirds?” heeseung watches you two with a pleased look on his face, “and i knew it would happen, it just took a little while for jake to get his head out of his ass.”
“be nice,” you scold heeseung, “he didn’t know, don’t be mean, heeseung.”
heeseung relents, raising his hands in a defensive manner, “fine, fine.”
the five of you fall into a comfortable conversation, with jay cracking jokes and sunghoon laughing at all of them, heeseung watching them both with amusement in his gaze.
“can we go home? i’m kinda tired…” you ask jake after a while of conversing and enjoying yourself with the four men, staring up at him with two wide eyes that he realizes he’s never been able to say no to, and today will not be the day that he starts. little does he know the ulterior motive brewing in your stomach, wetness growing between your legs since you passed by the room where the two of you first slept together. “sure, pretty. let’s go.” the two of you bid your goodbyes to the trio, watching as they bicker about their betting habits as you head out.
the two of you drive back to jake’s apartment, which will soon be yours since your lease with wonyoung is coming up, and your soon to be former roommate and still current best friend has decided to take a semester abroad, getting into her dream program that she’s been talking about since the summer.
“are you really tired, baby?” a mischievous smile overtakes your features as you shake your head, leading jake to the bed and pushing him to sit on the edge of it. “oh, i see…” jake smiles, hands covering the expanse of your hips as you straddle to sit on his lap.
“want you to make love to me, jakey,” you plead, grinding your core down onto him.
“god, angel–” jake groans at the feeling of you pressing yourself against him, “fuck, you drive me crazy,” he pushes you down further onto his clothed member as you continue your motions, needing to feel more friction. “if i weren’t so hard right now i’d make you ride my thigh forever.”
you groan at his admission, movements faltering and he takes your moment of distraction to pick you up, placing you against the pillows. he pulls back for a moment, tugging his shirt over his head and you gawk at the sight of his toned stomach, only ever seeing it in glimpses during your previous escapades.
“mmm, i could just eat you up,” you tell him, running your fingernails up and down gently along his abs, “can’t believe you’ve hidden this under your shirts all this time…”
“you were itching to get a peek all these years, weren’t you, baby?” jake teases as he takes your shirt off next, tugging your bra off after and pinching a nipple between his fingers. you groan, back arching up as he sucks on the opposite one harshly. “j– jake–” you groan, hands threading into his hair and pulling lightly. he groans against your skin, loving the feeling of the pain rushing through his scalp. “oooh, you like that, pretty boy?” jake moans as you pull his mouth away from your nipple, eyes fluttering shut at the sting traveling through his scalp as you tug at his locks again.
“stop,” jake begs, “another time, baby, let me take care of you tonight.” he sighs in relief as you release your hold on his hair. “alright, sim, you’re free to go this time… but i’ll be saving that for later, baby boy.”
“god, you’re such a menace,” jake groans as his mind returns from the subspace he was slowly slipping into, sliding down the bed until he’s eye level with your core, seeing the wetness nearly escaping from your thin panties. he tugs your skirt off unceremoniously, “been wanting to eat you since the first night i had you, pretty,” jake bites at your panties and yanks them down with his teeth, the sight making you whimper at the pure sex appeal oozing from the man beneath you. jake leans in and dips his tongue between your folds. “fuck, knew you’d taste so sweet, angel.”
jake eats you out like a man starved, slobbering into your folds, pushing his tongue into your pussy, flicking his tongue inside of you. you moan loudly, hands gripping the sheets on the bed, a nearly pornographic sound escaping your lips as jake sucks harshly on your clit, stars appearing behind your eyelids.
“fuck, jake–” you glance down to see the man of your dreams perched between your legs, whimpering at the sight of him biting your inner thighs and gripping your legs tightly, holding them wide open for him to have full access. “you close, angel?” he smiles up at you, the vision of him with your wetness coating his mouth and chin pulling another noise from your parted lips. you nod quickly, “please, jake,” you plead, a request he responds to by continuing his assault on your already abused and leaking pussy, his tongue’s movements pulling a well deserved orgasm from your body, watching as your back arches up, pushing your core further into his mouth.
“jake!” you whine, fluid still gushing out, eyes squeezed shut as the pleasure continues to pass over you in overwhelming waves. “‘s too much!”
“oh no it’s not, my sweet angel girl can take it,” jake argues before biting your clit.
“ahh!–” you scream, the sound bringing a smile to jake’s face, continuing to push you to overstimulation with his wet muscle’s motions against your pussy.
jake finally relents after you’re nearly in tears from the overwhelming sensations he’s putting your body through, bringing his face up to be level with yours, his clothed member pressing against your still dripping pussy, “you’re so pretty when you cry, baby.” he whispers with sincerity, capturing your lips in a quick, searing kiss before pulling away again to whisper, “i only ever want to see you cry because i’m making you feel good, okay?”
“okay, jake,” you whisper in response, smile tugging at the corner of your lips at your boyfriend’s insistence on treating you right until the end of time.
“no more crying unless it’s on my cock,” jake smirks, the words making you clench at your pure attraction and adoration for the man in front of you.
watching jake tug his pants down his legs makes you groan, staring down at the huge bulge pressing against his thin boxers. “stop teasing, jake,” you whine.
“baby can’t wait any longer?” you shake your head, watching as jake pulls his boxers off, the blushing, leaking tip of his cock making your mouth water. “ahh, what an eager girl. if you weren’t dripping onto my sheets right now i’d make you suck my cock. but i’ll be nice and give my baby what she needs.” jake rambles on as you can do nothing but stare at his length, drooling at the sight of it, knowing the stretch it gives you is always delicious, never fully adjusting to his generous size even after all the times you’ve been together.
jake breaches your entrance, letting just the tip sit inside your hole. you wiggle, trying to force him further inside, “patience, baby,” he scolds and you whimper at his strict tone coming out. “don’t want me to punish you, do you?” you shake your head. you know you could take a punishment, but right now you just want jake to hold you close as he makes love to you.
jake slowly slides in further, watching with hungry eyes as your hole takes him easily, “fuck, baby, i’m gonna keep you stuffed, my sexy ass girlfriend deserves to be filled up all hours of the day,” he babbles as he buries himself to the hilt, the snug fit of your walls filling his brain with even more delicious, dirty thoughts.
“mm– feel so full,” you mutter, watching jake’s face with adoration and love in your eyes, “thank you, jakey,” you whimper as he slides nearly all the way out, allowing just the tip to stay inside before pushing back in slowly, groaning at the feeling of your gummy walls sucking him right back in without protest, “god, this tiny pussy was made just for my cock.” you nod in response, seeing jake watching your face now before he’s wrapping his arms around your shoulders, pressing himself as close to you as he possibly can as he presses his face into your neck, sucking and biting at the junction between your throat and shoulder. jake tries desperately to leave marks, wanting to see them on your gorgeous skin when he wakes up next to you the following morning; little does he know you’ll wake him up with his cock in your mouth, mumbling around the dick that pushes an ache to your jaw about how you just wanted to help as you saw him sleeping with a tent in his boxers.
“need you closer,” you plead as jake rocks slowly in and out of you, love penetrating each thrust as he buries himself as deep as possible inside your pretty hole, the sensations pushing jake to the edge, the rubber band in his stomach begging to snap. “ugh–” you groan against jake’s lips as he captures them in a kiss, slow and sloppy but so full of want and need and unspoken pleas of never leave my side.
jake pulls away from the kiss, continuing to push into you with slow movements, wanting to feel every inch of your walls with each drag of his cock, holding his impending orgasm back behind gritted teeth, “tell me what you need, baby, wanna feel you cum all over my cock.”
“just need you,” you plead, eyes watering from the overwhelming presence of jake bearing his body to you, his mind and soul on display as he shows you how much he needs you with each loving action. “just need you,” you repeat, mind slipping away as he continues his movements, hips never tiring as he chases what he knows you need. jake removes one arm from your neck to snake down to your core, rubbing between your folds to gather up your own wetness before rubbing against your clit in the pattern he knows you love.
“fuck– jakey–” you groan, burying your head into the crook of his neck as he stares down at where the two of you meet, mind never getting tired of the visual of you taking him all inside, his length sliding in and out with ease. jake begins to fuck into you faster, nearly rutting against you as he chases the orgasm he knows is brewing in your gut. “come on, my angel girl, make a mess on me,” his words in your ears as you pull away from his neck to look at him. you nearly cry seeing jake meet your gaze; his delicate brown eyes meeting your own, need swimming in his gaze, “fuck!–” you gasp, beginning to babble words that don’t register in your mind as your high washes over you. jake watches your eyes fluttering shut, finally allowing himself to cum with you, pushing as deep as he can. jake watches as your breathing returns to normal, glancing down at the white ring surrounding his length, some of your cum mixture escaping and spilling everywhere. “god, baby, look at you. my perfect angel.” he traces his thumb along your cheek, watching a smile overtake your lips, knowing you’re utterly spent after only two orgasms. the day’s festivities have taken a toll on you, and he can see the tiredness in your eyes as they watch him with adoration.
you smile, “you don’t even know how happy you make me.”
jake cleans both of you off diligently, promising to throw the bedding in the wash tomorrow, knowing the cum would stain if you left it any longer. “i love you,” he breathes out, watching your face for a reaction at his sudden admission. you nearly cry as the words reach your ears, an overwhelming sensation in your gut. “you do?” you whimper, eyesight feeling blurring from the tears accumulating along your lashline. “i do, baby.”
“i love you, too, jakey.” he wraps you in a hug, neither of you caring that you’re both still naked, just needing to feel his hands holding you close to him. your voice is shaky and quiet as he holds you impossibly close, “i love you so much, you don’t even know.”
jake pulls back, holding your shoulders and placing kisses all over your face, on any spot he can reach, “you don’t know how happy i am to hear that, angel. you’ve made my life so much better.”
“now you have a built in study partner for life,” you tease, smiling at his continued onslaught of gentle kisses across your cheeks and nose, on your eyelids and on the corner of your mouth. “for life, huh?” jake teases, watching as your cheeks burn red at the realization of what you’ve said.
“don’t worry, pretty. now that i have you, i’m never letting you go.”
2K notes · View notes
prkhaven · 2 months ago
Text
YOU BELONG TO ME -p.js, p.sh-
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pairing— fwb’s brother!jay x fem!reader x fwb!sunghoon
genre: smut minors do not interact, angst, slight fluff, friend with benefits au, friend with benefits’ brother au, park twin brothers, sibling rivarly, love triangle, p with plot, p with feeling
wc: 27.2k
-all warnings below cut-
warnings: morally ambiguous characters, profanity, toxicity, manipulation, possessiveness, arguing, kissing, mention of family member passing
smut warnings: unprotected sex (uh don’t do that), multiple sex scenes, p in v, dirty talk, marking, praising, degradation, creampies, fingering, riding, handjob, some spanking, cum eating, slight choking, dry humping, oral(f rec.), usage of nicknames(princess, baby, slut, good girl)
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You don't know how long you've been standing staring at the large portrait on the wall. Your body was achingly sore and the only piece of fabric you were wearing was your friend, Sunghoon's oversized shirt.
You somehow managed to slip away from his bearlike hold as he was sound asleep to use the bathroom but you stumbled upon the portrait dead center on the wall in the hallway that you walked through countless of times nevering noticing until now.
As you analyzed it, you wondered how you never paid attention to it earlier. You tilted your head to the side, zeroing your focus to the other person beside Sunghoon in the portrait, Park Jongseong or how Sunghoon referred to him the very few times he did talk about him, Jay, his twin older brother.
His sharp jawline, the butterfly shaped birthmark on the side of his neck, the earrings on his ear, his sharp piercing gaze and slicked hair with an undercut made you furrow your eyebrows feeling the slight downward frown tugging at your lips as he felt all too familiar but you couldn't seem to place a finger on where you've seen him before.
Your thoughts were interrupted when you felt a hand creeping onto your waist, pulling you as a kiss was planted on the side of your face, "What's in that pretty head of yours princess?" Sunghoon's deep morning voice whispered into the shell of your ear which usually made you weak but this time it didn't as you were too preoccupied by the portrait
"You never talk about your brother Hoonie" Your gaze remained on Jay's stoic face which didn't go unnoticed by Sunghoon who normally would soften to mush by the nickname only you were allowed to use
However, the mere mention of his brother falling through your lips fueled something nasty within him.
Sunghoon took a glance at the portrait you never once looked away from even when he appeared next to you. He stared at the photo remembering how his father proudly put the portrait up when it first arrived.
His expressionless face now held a deep scowl the more he looked at the picture or more so at his brother beside him in the photo whose gaze he interpreted to be nothing more than pure judgment and disappointment towards him and that angered Sunghoon.
His grip on your waist tightened as he ripped his eyes away from the picture to begin planting desperate kisses from your cheek down to your neck to get your attention away from the portrait, off his brother.
"Let's go back to bed mhm?" Sunghoon hummed against your neck causing you to giggle from the ticklish manner, he smirked in satisfaction that he was able to garner your attention back onto him where it belonged, not on his brother
You tried to push him off but he wouldn't budge as you thought he would've, "You need to go get ready, you have class toda-" You were interrupted by his lips capturing yours in a haste to shut you up
"I think I'll miss class today" Sunghoon mumbled against your lips as he fully wrapped his arms around you as he turned his back to the picture as he ushered you back to his room
You smiled in the kiss allowing yourself to be guided right back into the very room and bed you knew far too well to just be considered Sunghoon's friend.
Your hands ruffled in his hair as the kiss grew more feverish and when his lips detached from yours to trail back to your neck with hopeless need to mark you for everyone to see, you let out breathless gasps as he sucked on your neck running the wet stride of his tongue against the burning blemish slowly growing on your neck to soothe it before moving to an unmarked patch on your neck to continue his burning desire to completely devour you up.
He kicked open his bedroom door and not wanting to let you go for even a second he used his foot to close the door because if the portrait was out of sight, it was out of mind.
Yet, his harsh tug on your skin through his teeth made you unconsciously open your eyes, your gasps became louder from his growing desperation and through your half lidded eyes and the few seconds before his bedroom door closed, you caught a glimpse of the portrait once again.
You didn't know why Sunghoon avoided any conversation involving his brother however, what ate you up the most was why Jay seemed so familiar to you.
But the thought ended the moment Sunghoon's bedroom door slammed shut, his mouth going further down your neck to your collarbone as you were led right back into his bed.
ᥫ᭡.
Before the start of you and Sunghoon, you lived in the peaceful life you worked so hard to create for yourself, forgetting mostly of the taints of your haunting past but it wasn’t until he showed up that there was a shift in your said peaceful life. 
You never anticipated crossing paths with him and yet one day you found him waiting outside your lecture for you. At first he spewed nonsense that went through one ear and out the other but he brought your attention to the failing paper shoved in your face.
You looked between him and the paper wondering what his failing grade had to do with you but when he asked if you could tutor him, you kindly declined offering someone who would be more than willing to help him but he was adamant on having you as his tutor. 
And it didn’t stop there. You didn’t know how stubborn he was at the first but you were quick to realize; Sunghoon wanted, needed, you to be his tutor for whatever reason that he always made sure to greet you whenever he saw you, would even offer to hold your bag noticing how you rubbed your sore shoulder because of it or how he would randomly gift you things that he oddly knew you liked.
You weren’t sure if he was doing this for you to convince you to become his tutor or simply because he was bored and wanted to meddle into your life but after weeks of him following you around like a lost puppy you finally caved in and agreed to become his tutor. 
When his bright smile showed the two teeth like fangs that peaked out hearing the agreement fired something causing a twinge tingle in your brain. 
You thought that would be the end of it. However, instead of only seeing him during the tutoring sessions, you began seeing him everywhere.
Your life was suddenly becoming immersed with him that soon enough you were able to spot him in any crowd.
Now you weren’t sure if it was because of an illusive spotlight beaming down on him or if it was just the reflectiveness of the bracelet he seemed to always wear shimmering in the light but in every and any sea of people he shone brightly making it easy for you to spot him from a mile away.
Even when you were out late, Sunghoon would glimmer in all his glory after magically appearing out of the shadows since he happened to be out too and would end up tagging along wherever you were going, abandoning his own plans to be with you. 
It was awkward and quiet at first not knowing what to talk about outside of the sessions but whenever you spewed something to get rid of the silence, he listened even when you deemed it pointless because to him it wasn’t. 
Inching closer to Sunghoon the more you saw him to the point that he began picking you up and dropping you off at the university every time you had class even when he didn’t.
And if you ever needed to go somewhere, all you needed was to mention it to him and he’ll bring you there no questions asked.
He was also now never empty handed when he knew he would be seeing you, especially when you were seeing each other practically everyday. He’d have gifts ready to be left in the passenger seat you always found yourself sitting in or in hand waiting to be directly handed to you.
Sunghoon is stubborn yet he is more confusing than ever. You wondered how he suddenly appeared in your life out of nowhere, seeming to have a greater goal in mind that went beyond just simple tutoring and far beyond a regular friendship.
He would always move you to the inside of the sidewalk to let him walk on the outside. Making his own way that he deemed the only efficient way to garner your attention was by poking your cheek whenever you weren’t giving enough attention to him. 
And what confused you the most was when he picked up a fallen eyelash off your cheek giving a soft smile looking at you and for a split second you caught his eyes shifting to your lips before blowing the eyelash away in hopes of making his wish come true.
Sunghoon was confusing and slick that you never knew what his next move could be.
There was just so much of him to unravel that you needed time to dissect every inch of him to understand a little piece of him and without realizing it, you were becoming so accustomed to his presence in your life that you couldn’t remember what it was like without him in it. 
ᥫ᭡.
On a late afternoon you were sitting next to Sunghoon in his room zoning out as you waited for him to finish the assignment questions. It’s been over 5 hours you’ve been over trying to help him understand the material and you felt like your own head was going to fall off. 
Coming back to your senses when feeling a poke to your cheek, “What’s in that head of yours?” You blinked realizing how you were staring at him instead of the wall like you thought you were
Sunghoon, playing with the pen that poked your cheek, smirked smugly as he watched your faltering gaze quickly move from his, choosing to ignore his question as you now looked over the various photo frames on his desk.
There was a family picture, a beautiful one at that. You looked over and saw how Sunghoon resembled the woman in the picture greatly.
But when you caught the person on the opposite end of the Sunghoon who looked similar to him looking straight ahead both on each end of the man in the middle, not a single emotion on their face or in their eyes made a shiver run up your spine the more you looked at it. 
You tried to look away but you couldn’t. So to avoid any more awkwardness, you innocently were going to ask if that was his brother, whom you’ve never seen around, in the photo but he spoke before you could, “I have something for you”
Your eyes looked away from picture to Sunghoon seeing how he fully turned towards you opening a necklace case that you didn’t notice he pulled out, “I found this the other day” He softly said but it felt muffled in your ears
Your jaw dropped as your eyes trailed up from the case to Sunghoon’s worried expression that was replaced with a shy warm smile when you looked at him. 
It was the very necklace you mindlessly mentioned once during a late night call with him that you never managed to get after it was sold out right when you had just enough money to buy it.
And yet here it was being presented to you by none other than Sunghoon. 
“You didn’t”
It was common for him to get random gifts for you that surrounded what you liked even when you told him it wasn’t necessary but this gift… It was different, it laid heavy on your heart. 
Sunghoon carefully pulled out the dainty necklace, placing the open case onto his desk with the discarded assignment and unclasped it, getting up from his seat and walking behind you.
“But I did.” His voice low and stern making you weak in the knees that you were grateful for the chair you were sitting in for holding you up
You felt the cold metal against your skin as he placed it around you, your breathing silently shuddering seeing the reflection in the mirror at the corner of his room.
Sunghoon standing behind you, the necklace you’ve been wanting is finally around your neck.
You unconsciously touch your necklace, admiring its simplicity but now great value. 
Sunghoon leveled his head next to yours, his eyes looking directly at you through the mirror, “Pretty” He softly whispered, a faint smile ghosting his face 
Unable to remove your eyes from him in the mirror, you let yourself get captivated by the moment, the necklace, him. 
With small hesitance he pressed his lips against your head. There was a harsh thump against your chest. What is he doing?
But you recklessly turned without realizing how close the two of you would be. 
His nose bumped with yours as he continued looking at you. You couldn’t look away. You knew Sunghoon was attractive but seeing him upclose made you realize he always had been and forever will be. 
He looked deeply into your eyes, making you gulp harshly trying to rationalize your mind and body but you were betrayed by your heart and the desire you’ve been pushing away from wherever it came from and when it started even though you weren’t sure when that was. 
Slowly easing in closer he heard the light shake of your breath as your lips grazed before finally landing on each other.
The kiss started off with your lips solely on each other but he felt when you melted right into it, your mouth beginning to move wanting more and he held back a smile, this was exactly what he wanted. 
In your mushed mind you comprehended that you were far past the blurred line to the point of no recognition of what you thought was a friendship with Sunghoon as it now became more. 
Your hand balled into fist to stop the itch from entangling it in his hair but like he sensed it, he grabbed your hand prying it open with his fingers to place it at the back of his head as it grasped his hair igniting a soft groan from him. 
Rising from his leveled position he grabbed your chin tilting your head up in order to provide access to your neck where his hand gilded up and down as he continued to kiss you.
As your neck was craned up, too engrossed in his lips you didn’t notice him sitting back on the chair until you felt his hands travel from neck down to your waist as your fingers raked through his hair, loving how it slotted right through as you pulled him closer to you than he has ever been. 
Allowing you, Sunghoon let you contort his body in any way you want, as long as you kept your lips on his. 
The kiss became desperate as your teeth clashed together, the lack of air making you both lightheaded and the harsh tugs to his hair with his guidance making you sit on his lap. You slotted your legs on each side of his hips as you trapped his head in between your arms as he kissed all the oxygen out of you. 
“Let me take care of you” The foreign intimate words fell from his mouth landing right through your ears to your hazy mind and beating heart
When you pulled away from the kiss not sure if you heard him right you saw a desperate gleam in his eyes that sent you afloat straight into the gripping lustful cloud that’s been waiting to grasp you and hold you. 
Not saying anything, you allowed yourself to be pulled in by him like a magnetic pull as you landed your lips right onto his again. 
Sunghoon smiled pleased by the response even if there were no words spoken, your actions spoke louder than any words that could possibly be said. 
He wrapped a strong arm around you to flush your chest against his as his freehand inched higher until it reached your neck to softly grab it.
You squealed, feeling the tight squeeze on your neck providing him the access he needed for his tongue to slip past your mouth and into the territory he’s been waiting to explore.
His arm that held you went to play with the hem of your shirt before slipping under it, letting his hands roam free on your bare back.
The tighter tug on his hair and the feeling of goosebumps on your skin was his direct sign, his finger massaged at your neck, feeling the structure of it as he tugged on your bottom lip to slip his tongue back in. 
Push and pull feel on your neck made you arch your back feeling his other hand traveling higher up your back finding the clasps of your bra and playing the metal.
He pulled his lips away from your swollen ones making you pout that he pulled away. He looked at you with a small smile, finding you cute. 
So needy, he placed a long kiss to satisfy you just enough until he kissed in between your jaw and neck, having you throw your head back to provide him all the access in the world. How easily you did this was more than enough to show him how you must've been waiting for this.
He felt bad depriving you for long but it’s okay now. He’s here. 
When he easily found your sweet spot, gasps fell from your swollen lips. His fingers playing with the skin of your neck when his mouth sucked on some other part.
If it weren’t for him holding on to you, you would’ve crumbled right to his bedroom floor.
“Already weak” He mumbled as he sucked on your sweet spot wanting to emit the noises that were muffled before by his mouth 
Your mouth slacks as soft moans fall out, your body curving to his teasing touch, his lips trailing all over your neck from right to left to left to right, always stopping in the center to kiss all the way up to catch your lips for a moment before going back to your neck. 
The woozy feeling coursing through you had your hips rocking in his lap whenever he’d suck on your sweet spot harsher to hear you squeal. Getting lost in the sensation that was taking over your body, you were hot all around.
Your panties clung to your soaked entrance easily from the fast rocks of your hips, telling what you want or how your body interprets it, what you need.  
Sunghoon’s hands rested at your rocking hips guiding them faster, “Such a dirty slut, humping all over my lap” He chuckled but his words made the sensation in your stomach grow more
You landed your head in the crook of his neck as desperate whines spilled out of you. The clothed friction against your soaked self made you feel such a pleasure you’ve never felt before.
It jolted you to land on top of his hardened cock that was kept in the restraints of his pants, making him hold back a deep groan feeling you right on top of him.
“Please” You breathlessly pant hoping the single word plea was enough for him to understand what you mean 
But Sunghoon liked seeing this foreign side of you, seeing how desperate you are– willing to dismantle yourself just to get him, “Please what?” He halted your rocked making you whine pathetically 
“Anything… Just Pl-Please” You knew what he wanted from you, to beg for him but wanting to save the last bit of dignity you had you didn’t want to give in, you tried to grind your hips again but he only sent a slap on your ass making you yelp 
“I asked for clarification slut” He tsked loudly pushing you off his lap only to have you tightly wrap around his body to stop him, shaking your head but you needed clarification yourself 
Did you not want him to push you away or was it that your pride wouldn’t allow you to speak out on what you were begging for?
Feeling the shaking of your buried head in his neck, he scoffed a smirk before slipping his hand between your meshed bodies to wrap around your neck holding your jaw in the process to push you away to have you face him. 
Your eyes looked away from Sunghoon but with his hand tightening around your neck, it finally made your hesitant eyes meet him only to see how he was completely unphased as he stared right past your strong facade to see you. 
It felt like he was looking deep into your soul and reading every single thought that ever crossed your mind, seeing and judging the burning desire in you that needed to be free to soar, “Go on, tell me what you want?” He huskily chuckled
“Want me to teach you just what fast is? Mhm?” He raised a teasing eyebrow, his fingers playing at the sides of your neck seeing how your eyes flickered away from his
Content with your lack of response, it wasn’t nearly enough to make him satisfied. He selfishly wanted more. “Or are you looking to get fucked hard?”
He smirked when he heard you incoherently mumbling. He pulled your head next to his by your neck to have your mouth grazing the shell of his ear, “What did you say?” The dark rumble of his voice made your body weak
You tugged at the bottom of your lip having to decide to throw away your pride, to accept his terms and with a mumbled as loud as your voice would allow, “Please fuck me Sunghoon” 
His grin grew wider while his mind now filled with demand to give you everything that you could possibly ever want, needing to spoil you in the way you asked him for. 
“Good girl” He whispered letting go of your neck tapping the side of your hips, the echoing sounding throughout the room telling you to move your hips again
You started grinding again on his clothed cock as your hands landed on his shoulders, eyes shut tight shivering from the sensation of your clothed core rubbing to the dent in his pants while his hand slipped past your shirt to unclasped your bra. 
Sunghoon moved your bra away just enough to cup one of your breasts with his hand, his thumb creasing your hardened nipple before tugging on it making you jump.
Your grinds grew frantic chasing the familiar build up in your stomach, “Sunghoon- Sunghoon” You breathlessly chanted his name as he was all that you could think of
He liked hearing his name coming from you, he thinks he could listen to you forever when he was the one making you feel this way. Your hips stammered in their movements as you could feel the nearing of your climax. You couldn’t believe you were getting off on his lap this easily but your body reacted the way it wanted to him. 
Your fingers deep into his shoulder blades as he altered between your breasts roughly pinching them to then soothe the burning sensation while his other hand laid on the base of your ass, helping your weakening ruts on his crotch to help reach your high.
Whenever you dared to stop even just for a moment, he’d smack your ass harshly making you whine loudly, pushing your tired body to continue further if you wanted to come. 
“Keep going. Come in your pants for me” He teased and the soak of your panties beginning to seep through to your pants made your cheeks burn from embarrassment but it felt too good to care about it
The movements of your hips only grew faster chasing the feeling until you were overwhelmed by it, your loud moan and his low groan mixed together as you came in your pants making you cringe at your pure desperate action. 
Sunghoon fondled with the material of your pants moving your hips again having you shudder on his lap, shaking your head unable to handle the overstimulation and he had to stop himself from laughing. You were so cute like this. 
He stopped the grinding movements and placed a kiss on the side of your head as he hiked your shirt higher and higher, tapping at your skin to put your arms up to let him remove your shirt and bra in a single motion, throwing them somewhere in his room to be forgotten. 
Yet, he didn’t think this through. This was the very first time he’s ever seeing you like this, so compromising, so needy, so perfect just for him.
Your pretty face flushed, the perk of your nipples rose up and down following your pants and how the necklace he bought you rested against your collarbone glimmering in the dim lighting, he slipped just for a second.
Noticing his eyes never moving from your exposed body, your cheeks burned more as you covered yourself with your arms which he quickly stopped before you could completely do so, “Don’t cover yourself…” He couldn't bear not being able to look at you
He looked up to see your eyes looking at him, a slight frown on your face, “You’re beautiful” His words melted the frown off your face making it flip.
Your lips tugged upwards allowing your arms to be pulled away as he leaned in to peck a soft kiss at your jaw before lowering to your breast. He followed the curve of your chest, he wanted to memorize every crevice, curve, dip, you had. 
His hands roamed freely on your body soothing your goosebump filled skin while your hands traced over his shirt before threading lower until you were between the hem of it and the waist of his pants. 
He softly grunted, nodding his head noticing your silent asking and without wasting time, you moved yourself away from his crotch. Unbuttoning his pants, you tugged at his belt loop and brought his pants along with his boxer in a teasing manner until it was just enough for his aching cock to spring out and hit his stomach. 
His angry tip leaked with precum with faint twitching every few seconds showing its desperate need made your body burn.
You may have underestimated him big time. He was big, really fucking big. 
You tried to hide your wavering eyes and harsh gulp as you stared at him before grabbing him at the base, softly dragging your hand up and down in a pace that didn’t meet his standard in the slightest but he was too occupied with how your hand felt wrapped around him, it was just perfect.
Sunghoon threw his head back when your thumb grazed his slit, smearing his precum all over his tip as your thumb was coated with it without a care in the world.
His chest rose and fell with each heavy pant. Your hands were pure magic. You were wonderful. His mind is filled with your hand, the strokes you were giving him, your soft hums, just you. 
You smiled seeing how the roles were easily reversed and you had him falling apart for you.
Moving your hand in the slow jerking motion made Sunghoon grow frustrated, he grabbed your wrist to move your hand faster on his cock, “Taking so long” He spat, “Never jerked someone off before?” His eyes screwing shut when you picked up in pace sending immense pleasure throughout his body 
The more he twitched in your hand the more you knew he was growing closer to his climax, you pushed away his holding hand on your wrist, continuing the same pace he was guiding you in.
His now free hand lazily rested on your hip playing with the fabric of your pants and you knew what it meant. 
This time you were the one smirking from the scene before you. Through half lidded eyes he saw your egotistical smile, the outline of your body illuminated by the lamp on his desk making it feel like you were sent to him. 
Even when he was the one searching for you, you were the one who found him ready to save him. 
His attempts to unbutton your pants wanting nothing more but to absolutely devour you whole were futile as you pumped him with a faster pace.
His hands shook unable to get a proper opening to get your pants off, “F-fuck” He groaned when you squeezed his cock every few times then teasing his tip with achingly soft pinches, hiding your smile
You stared at your working hand, admiring how he looked in your hold before trailing up to look at his half lidded ones trying to look at you barely being able to hold them open from the pleasure.
Without any warning, you felt the spurts coming out of his tip landing all over your hand and some even landing on your bare stomach.
Sunghoon shuddered, his cock twitching at your continuous pumps even through his orgasm on his still hard on, “Sh-Shit, you milking me or wha-What?” He grunted, his body beginning to shake from the stimulation 
You were making him fall apart for you just by your hands and he hasn’t had someone make him like this before, ever.
When you finally stopped, pulling away from his mess covered cock from your cum covered hand, you brought your hand to lick it clean.
You gruntled tasting the salt bitter taste of his release but it still managed to satisfy your taste buds. He heard you. The opening of your mouth and when he focused just enough he heard the stride of your tongue gliding.
Fuck you were licking your hand clean and he was missing the entire thing because he couldn’t open his damn eyes.
He gulped trying to catch his breath trying to recollect his puddle of a mind. There was never a time he orgasmed by hands alone.
So when it came to you ripping one out of him just like that, he was shocked, confused with his own body and possibly his own mind. 
“Sunghoon?” Hearing your voice soft and careful erupted something in him and his twitching cock
Without opening his eyes, he memorized your body on his lap far enough to successfully unbutton your pants without a single peek with the intention to rip them off of your body. 
You lifted yourself off his lap just enough as he finally opened his eyes to look at you with hungry eyes making your insides twist and turn into a bundle of knots.
Helping his hastiness, dragging down your pants along with your soaked panties until they somehow were able to drop to your ankle before kicking them off to the floor. 
Sunghoon pulled your body back down, the feel of your bare soaking pussy landing right on top of his cock made him groan and you whine.
He muffled the noises by crashing his lips onto yours, holding the back of your head to hold you close to him. There was a thump against his chest from the building excitement. 
Rocking your hips, feeling his cock slip in between your wet folds made you cry in the kiss from the delicious feel, “Can’t fucking wait, can you?” He bit your lip making you squeal but you didn’t stop kissing him
You hungrily continued, shaking your head innocently as you rocked your soaking core against his hard self. 
“Hoonie” You breathlessly spoke 
He hated being called nicknames, he despised every single one he was ever given but surprisingly not yours. Instead the singular nickname melted right through the cold facade he kept up for his entire life and burned him whole in a matter of seconds.
Normally he held himself highly in maintaining his rationality but now it lay long forgotten about in an empty abyss.
Stilling your pitiful grind, he grabbed his cock from the confinement of your folds to tap it against your bare stomach, insinuating you to lift your lower body for him. 
Without a second thought, you raised yourself watching how he aligned his leaking tip to your welcoming entrance.
The tingling feeling in your stomach of your nerves going haywire was replaced by the stretch of Sunghoon’s tip protruding slipping past your pussy walls inside of you. 
You hissed loudly as he started sinking you down, “W-Wait” You whimpered feeling the new stretch but he didn’t stop, resuming coating his shaft with your enticing walls
“Take it slut- Couldn’t wait a few seconds ago- Shit” His harsh words only fueled your arousal making it easier in between the crevices that were soon covered and filled by his cock being sucked in by you 
Clenching around him, he weakly slapped on the side of your ass followed by a harsher one after not being pleased with how quiet the first one was. 
His slaps made you jolt on his cock making you moan from the waves of pleasure that shot straight to your stretched out core. Gripping your neck, he brought himself to the shell of your ear, “Bet you’ve been waiting to be split open on my cock” He whispered, “Admit it slut” 
You couldn’t respond, only able to let out loud gasps as his long cock slipped deeper into you, filling you up in ways you never felt before, “Mhmm” You delirious rumbled making him frown, displeased with the minimum response 
“Hoonie- Want your cock…Please”
He froze. His hand on your neck loosened for a moment as all he could focus on was your soft pleas and whines. His mind clouded just for a moment before shaking it away.
You expected him to do all the work and that made him laugh, he let go of your neck to stroke the side of your face tooting his lips, “You wanted my cock, now work to please yourself” He tried to ignore just how perfectly you were engulfing him as he lazily lied back in the chair but each squeeze you gave around him made him feel good, so good. “Start working” 
Having to see the smug tug of his lip made you frown but too overcome with need to put up any type of fight, you slowly raised your lower body up his length before sliding back down making him let out a loud sigh of pleasure while turning his head to side as he watched where he disappeared inside of you only to reappear to just disappear again. 
Trying to get used to the stretch and fullness you felt, you let out pathetic wails as you bounced on him, swaying your hips around feeling how he moved inside of you and soon the pain was replaced by a pleasurable sensation. 
Your slow pace turned into a faster one. The sound of his low grunts and your louder moans, the meet of his crotch against your skin as you rode him filled the room. 
His hands dug into the flesh of your hips giving guidance to your bouncing self on him, watching how your breast moved with each of your hops, “Hoonie” You mewled 
You’re going to call him that every single time, he was going to make sure of it.
“The only one that could ever make you feel this way” Sunghoon wanted to plant that thought deep into your mind to make sure you never forget, only he could ever make you feel like this.
The feel of his tip kissing your cervix as he slipped in and out of you made you fall apart all over him, throwing your head back from the pleasure, your hands holding onto his shoulder for support, bouncing up and down at an arrhythmic pace just to keep some type of sense of having him deeply buried in you engraved in each crack of your brain. 
Sunghoon’s fingers grabbed your necklace forcing your thrown back head up to lift to see him through your heavy eyelids.
You mewled loudly as you felt his sudden fast thrust meeting your weaker ones, “Open your eyes… Look at me” He sent a spank to your ass making you yelp in the mix of your moans and mewls
“This is what you wanted, right slut? To get fucked hard by me?” Through your heavy lidded eyes, you saw his crazed filled ones watching your gaped mouth as endless noises fell out because of him. 
You furiously nodded. Through the perception you had for yourself and others to see and believe, deep down this was all you ever wanted. And Sunghoon saw all of it. 
He held your limp neck by your necklace, his thrusts reaching to where it could, sending you to height. Your lower body contorted, grinding up and down in an attempt to feel more of him in you, which you didn’t even think was possible, “Sunghoon- Please!” 
The loud smack of your ass made you cry as you could feel the burning sensation, “Not my fucking name” Sunghoon grunted
“Hoonie! Hoonie” You expressed the nickname you made for him, “Please Hoonie” You pleaded not sure what you were asking for but somehow Sunghoon knew 
He brought your body to press against him as he snapped his hips harder making you wrap your arms around his shoulders to leverage off of him.
The obscene noise of your leaking entrance meeting all the way to the base of his cock made your stomach flutter and your mind short circuit as you could only focus on the knot forming in your stomach.
You scratched at Sunghoon clothed back, your moans falling directly in his ears as you clenched harder around him as he easily glided in and out of your welcoming hole.
Chanting his name like a prayer as he was the only thing that you could ever know. His mind was being overtaken by you. 
“Taking me so well. Fuck princess” The new more endearing nickname made you flutter all around him, enjoying it more than you should’ve 
He let go of your necklace wrapping his arm over your back to hold your crumbling body sending another harsh slap sent to your ass making you whine as he rubbed his hand over it to soothe the reddening area, “Gonna fucking ruin you” 
Now that didn’t sound too bad.
With your foggy mind, you couldn't register the sentence that followed after, “Never letting you go”. You were too focused on the build up of pleasure in your stomach daring to snap at any moment that you only moaned louder at the words. 
His tip hitting the same spot in repetition without stopping for a second made all thoughts in your head useless unless it was about him, “Hoonie!” You repeated after yourself like a broken record and he could tell the way you tried to meet his thrust in attempts to savor the feeling
Noticing how your thrust became sloppier, the seeping arousal leaking everywhere below you and onto him, he grinned placing his hand at the back of your head, whispering loud enough for you to hear, “Make a mess on me you slut” 
Fuck, you felt good, Sunghoon made you feel so good. Through his relentless thrust, you clenched tightly around him feeling the wave of pleasure wash over you like a tidal wave unlike ever before. You took care of yourself every now and then but never once did it ever dismantle you like this.
Burying deep inside of you to help ride out your high and you came all over him more, the mix of your wetness and cum lathered around.
Watching your agape mouth and your tight shut eyes, Sunghoon admired your thrown back head as the relief your body felt washed over reaching the heights you’ve never felt before. 
This must be the universe's way of repaying him for everything he’s suffered through. Allowing him to have you and see you like this, so beautifully for him.
You soaked his cock in your cum, you were heavily breathing however the air got sucked back in as a loud wail erupted from your throat as you felt Sunghoon begin slipping in and out of you again.
Running a hand up and down your back to soothe your sensitive body, he whispered. “You can handle it right?” You were originally going to shake your head, the soreness of your stretched out walls was too much but the pleasurable feel was far greater than anything
You gave a weak nod unable to say a response, your mind gone in the cloud. Sunghoon felt beyond proud of you, he planted a kiss on your head before delivering a harsh snap reaching deeper into your walls that were molding to him.
With his arm holding around you, his shirt crumbled under your fingers as you held on tightly, supporting your stimulated body on his lap as he took over, allowing your body to lay on him as he did all the work now.
Something embroidered itself into his mind at that moment. His hand fondling with your ass, gripping onto it tightly before releasing it only to crease it sending a harsh slap making you yelp as his thrust met with your very faint ones, “Such a good fucking slut” He groaned as the mixed of your arousal and cum made it easier for his cock to ease out of you 
You whimpered feeling sudden emptiness but let out a loud gasp, your body moving forward pressing further against his when he reenterned you making you feel the fullness of his cock deep in you.
Your attempts to say anything to make him know how good he was making you feel were in vain as all that came out were strained moans, your voice becoming scratchy by how much you’ve been letting out. 
Through the muffle of your ears the lewd noises from your soaked self meeting with the base of his cock had you all over the edge again, the build up in your stomach forming. 
Sunghoon’s thrust became sloppy and irregular, the grip on your ass becoming harder that you could feel his fingers digging deep into the flesh of it, the connection between the two of you disappearing before reconnecting quickly, the build up daring to snap, “Sh-shit, almost there. Gonna be a good girl and take everything I give you” 
You gave rapid nods, your scratchy voice filling his ears, the tight clench around his aching cock. You’ll take everything. You’ll make him proud. 
“The most perfect pussy- Fuck!” Sunghoon’s mind too far gone to realize what he was saying, “Make you- Going to make you mine… Just for me” 
It didn’t soak into either of your minds to fully register, but there was a silent agreement of some sort. 
His sloppy thrust came to a stop as you felt the warm spurts inside of you painting your velvet walls pearly white of his cum.
Sunghoon screwed his eyes, the loudest groan rumbling out of him as your embrace around him grew tighter as his own climax prompted your third one.
Never before have you released not just once or twice but three damn times. 
As you and Sunghoon held onto each other feeling the sticky thin layer of sweat covering both of you but neither cared about it especially not when Sunghoon shallowly thrusted up to push his cum further inside of you.
His hand that tightly held your bottom now let go of the flesh, soothing the burning area by slowly rubbing in a more gentle manner. 
Your aching neck landed onto his shoulder, heaving trying to forbid yourself from crashing due to exhaustion. But oh was it really hard. Your body was more than willing to surrender as a warm feeling filled your insides. 
With his softened cock buried deep inside of you, he managed to let out a few praises, “You did so good, ‘m so proud of you” 
“Let me take care of you now” 
Somehow Sunghoon managed to read you like an open book that he didn’t even have to pry open. All he needed to do was crease the spine and you opened right up, welcoming him into your world. 
Your tensed body now softened in his arms, your heavy eyelids finally closing and your pants grew softer into slow deep breaths. He placed a sweet kiss on your temple allowing you to fully let go for him to take care of you.
“Rest princess”
You weren’t Park Sunghoon’s girlfriend and he wasn’t your boyfriend, you’re friends who happen to know what the other tastes like now.
ᥫ᭡.
In the passenger side of Sunghoon’s car he held up his phone to show the yet again 100 percent on his exam that you helped him study for.
His chest filled with pride as you showered him in praises. He worked hard for this so to be recognized by it, it made him feel good. 
You suddenly stopped your praises when you felt Sunghoon’s threading fingers fall from the side of your face down to your jaw to your neck where he began playing with your necklace. 
Admiring your necklace, he softly smiled to himself making you roll your eyes knowing he was filled to the brim with confidence, “Whoever got you that necklace did a wonderful job” He complimented
“Should thank my sugar daddy, he wastes all his money on me like it’s nothing and bought it for me” You shrugged your shoulders like it was nothing earning a laugh from him 
Looping your necklace with his fingers he raised his eyebrows amused by your choice of words, “Daddy?” 
From the entire sentence you said that was the only thing he picked up on. You looked at his crazed filled eyes and you held back a smile.
There was a prickling feeling in your heart seeing his expression, there was more than meets the eye and you wanted to delve straight into it.
You shoved Sunghoon back to the driver seat sneering at his response, “Nasty” 
He laughed heartily landing back in his seat, “You’re the one that said it” Raising his hands up in innocences but he was far from it well in bed at least
“I said other things too-” You were interrupted by him grabbing the back of your head to kiss you. Your eyelids felt heavy as you entered cloud 9, melting into the kiss. Your eyes closed as you were insatiably dragged into Sunghoon
He smirked, feeling how you easily gave up any control and handed it to him.
He adored you, he really did. Everything that he could ever wish for and it was you, “I really have to go” He murmured, he had to be at the airport in less than 5 minutes to go pick up his father and it was at least a 30 minutes drive, 40 minutes now because of rush hour 
He needed to leave now but he couldn’t seem to let go of you just yet, his lips messily clashed with yours. His hands falling to your cheek to cup it to deepen the kiss. Your heart filled with glee and warmth as his mouth perfectly moved with yours.
“Then pull away Hoonie” 
The damn nickname that made him surrender to you. He wasn’t going to pull away. His father can wait until he arrives.
Sunghoon shifted his body to face you as he ate away at your lips, he sucked at your bottom lip which easily gave him access to slip right on through.
Mind filled with haze and craze for you, he could do this forever. But you pulled away before he could fall too deep. 
He chased after your lips making you giggle and hearing you, he opened his eyes letting out his own disappointed sigh, “Make sure to drive safely” You soothed out his disheveled hair back to its somewhat regular state
Even though he was disappointed the kiss lasted so short, he was grateful for it, for you.
He smiled dumbly, nodding his head at every word you said even when it went in through one ear only to come out the other. 
You chuckled warmly seeing his dazed expression as you retracted your hand away from his regular styled hair, “Let me walk you to the door at least” 
But the moment he helped you out of the car, you were pressed up against his car as he hurriedly slotted his lips onto yours before you could say anything. Not even 5 minutes ago he told you he needed to leave but your mind slipped only focusing on him now.
Your hands found their way to the nape of his neck as his hands rested on your waist, rubbing his thumb on your side, “Thought you needed to go” You giggled as his mouth trailed to the marks on your neck left by him
You let out a satisfied moan as he sucked on the sensitive marks, “I really do need to go” He mumbled but not once did he show intentions of stopping
“You should really stop then” Sunghoon laughed, him stopping? What a joke. 
You’re like an addictive feeling that he will cling onto forever, he’ll never allow anything or anyone to come in between and take you away from him. 
“I don’t think I ever could.” 
ᥫ᭡.
Sunghoon arrived an hour late to the airport.
He was going to receive an earful from his father for being late but it was worth the hassle of being later when he was able to spend some extra minutes with you.
From the moment he shifted the gear to park, he texted you and patiently waited until you responded back before even thinking about texting his father where he was in the parking lot. 
Others would see this as unfair but Sunghoon had his priorities. He got out of the car and leaned up against it to be able to greet his father first thing when seeing him after being away, but his mind went to how not even an hour ago he had pressed you up against it, kissing you silly until you forcefully had to shove him back in his car and send him on his way. 
He felt the buzz of his phone and he looked to see you texted him to let you know when he made it back home even if you were taking a nap which he knew was going to be highly likely.
His lips tugged upwards, chuckling out a smile of pure happiness as he texted back a response to not miss him too much and that he’ll visit you in your dream which he knew you scoffed at but secretly enjoyed.
“Hoon” 
The call of that damn nickname made his throat and mouth dry up like a desert.
His smile dropped immediately, pocketing his phone and straightening out his posture because instead of seeing his father who he came all this way to pick up in the first place, he saw his brother with luggages in hand. 
Seeing his twin brother in the flesh again made his heart drop to the pit of his stomach because staring right at him was his worst nightmare. 
“Jay?” 
・・・・・
Outside on the balcony, Sunghoon tightly held his phone over the rails, his head low and eyes shut trying to ignore the painful pressure against it.
His father’s single text flashed in his head on repeat. Not only would he have to bear unknown months again which he never minded, always enjoying being by himself with the exception of you staying over, keeping him company.
He had to deal with someone else now.
Groaning as he kept his eyes closed feeling like at any moment he was going to disintegrate into pure matter and then to nothing. 
Thinking the fresh air would help get rid of sticky tar slowly slowly surrounding him but it quickly engulfed him whole when he heard the aggravating voice of his brother, “Hoon?” Jay softly knocked on the balcony door frame and Sunghoon stopped everything in his will to not launch himself at Jay 
The headache growing and the clawing of his stomach eating him right up each second Jay is in his presence.
He continued to have his back facing Jay who knew he had every right to be furious at him yet hoped the time apart from each other would ease the unresolved tension between them just a little bit. 
“Dad told me you have a tutor” Jay hoped to lighten the already dark mood from the moment he stepped foot onto the balcony, “I was shocked that you, the ace student, needed a tutor but he said your tutor is able to put an equal if not greater of a fight than you” 
“I’m glad you have someone pushing your limits, exceeding your already high expectations”
Sunghoon scoffed in his head. His already high expectations? Jay will never come close to understanding the struggle of expectation from anyone let alone from their father.
For as long as he could remember, he’s been living in Jay’s shadow, never able to escape it until Jay left for university. That was the only time Sunghoon understood what true peace was.  
While Jay expected some type of retaliation, he received nothing, only noticing how the spinning of Sunghoon’s phone came to a sudden halt hearing the mention of you, his oh so wonderful tutor. 
From Sunghoon’s hanging phone held by his fingers Jay saw his lock screen, though unable to see it properly, he was able to make out Sunghoon’s arm that had the Tiffany and co. bracelet their late mother gifted him that he finally grew into after all these years draped over someone whose face he couldn’t see but could notice the very dainty necklace. 
Sunghoon despised taking pictures whenever they were forced to for family pictures or solo portraits.
So seeing him display a picture taken by a digital camera boldly—so proudly. He wondered what was the depth behind it.
But even past his curiosity, he felt a sickening gnaw at his stomach the more he looked at the lock screen but he didn’t know why.
It wasn’t until Sunghoon caught Jay’s attention on his phone screen that he quickly flipped his phone over before putting it into his pocket, clenching his jaw.
Jay hasn’t been back for an entire day but was already slipping too deep back into his life for his liking.
Jay watched the sudden shift of mood from Sunghoon, noticing how he became more defensive, placing the already high walls higher than ever before.
One of the main reasons why Jay even took up his father’s offer to finish his studies back home in the first place was because of this.
Longing to be back in his brother’s life again, just like how he used to be. He hated how things fell apart between Sunghoon and him and he needed to make things right, for that to happen the first thing he needed to do was address everything from the start. Just not the very beginning yet.
Too caught up in his own head Jay didn’t realized nor expected Sunghoon to be the one breaking the suffocating silence, “Thought you were supposed to finish your studies abroad” 
His eyes flickered a hint of surprise in them but he quickly pushed that away, “Dad came to visit, mentioned how it was pointless for me to be studying abroad while you stayed behind,” Jay sighed, placing his back against the rail feeling the cold steel seeping through his shirt to his skin
“He was right… We were supposed to go abroad together” He looked over to Sunghoon who only looked ahead of him an unreadable expression on his face
“You know I always wondered how many strings he had to pull just to secure a spot for you” Sunghoon sneered, “I mean you purposefully flunked your way out of the academy to live your fantasy normal life and somehow still managed to get accepted” Sunghoon shook his head letting out a mocking laugh after the harsh spat of words
Of course their father would do everything in his power to make sure his twin sons received the highest achievements and education, especially if it was Jay on the line. 
Ever since they were young, their father realized Jay’s natural leadership, his way of obtaining and retaining knowledge and being unafraid of learning from others or speaking out about his opinion.
It was determined from the very start that Jay would be the righteous heir to their father’s company and brushed it off to be because Jay was the eldest out of the two by 3 minutes which Sunghoon knew was a lie and it infuriated him. 
Why wasn’t he allowed to prove himself? He was more than capable of doing what Jay can do and could do it even better than him.
Sunghoon worked day and night after declaring he would attend a university abroad instead of staying. All just to prove himself to everyone, especially to his perfect twin brother Jay that he was capable of doing great things just like him.
Whatever Sunghoon wanted, Jay would unintentionally snatch right from under his nose in the blink of an eye. Their father's attention, the ease of academic intelligence, the endless showers of praises and love and sweeping the one he liked off her feet without even realizing it.  
“Hoon” Jay softly called out and Sunghoon hated that he still used the nickname
Hearing the nickname from his brother’s mouth, it didn’t ease his heart or comfort him, it only aggravated him more. 
“It doesn’t matter either way, I didn’t feel like going abroad” Jay let out a loud scoff
If there was one thing Jay knew for certain about his brother that would never change is that Sunghoon was determined to go abroad for university. It was all he ever worked towards during their school years, having sleepless nights, setting high expectations just to ensure he was the top student each school year and not only did he achieve it but he set the curve.
Jay knew Sunghoon. 
“You went on that plane with intentions to go” 
Sunghoon shook his head, the sickening smirk still on his face, “No, I went on that plane with the intention to leave you before we took off”
“I knew you wouldn’t leave if I said I was staying behind from the start so I went along with it until the time came. I just wanted to make you believed we were actually go to university together” 
There was a strong ringing in Jay’s ear. All this time Jay believed, trusted, Sunghoon boarded the plane with the intention to leave, for them to attend the same university together but just couldn’t overlook what happened only to find out now that he was never going to leave in the first place. 
This was when Jay realized he did not know Sunghoon. 
Jay wasn’t as prideful as Sunghoon at least not anymore, he is now willing to admit when he is wrong, when he’s made a mistake. It took him a while to reach this point but he was finally there, he just hopes he isn’t too late. 
“I’m sorry” 
A sudden apology. The apology Sunghoon waited so long to hear. But it only caused the said male to look over to his brother with narrow eyes, deeply frowning, bringing his hands to grip the balcony rails tightly. “What are you apologizing for?”
“For everything” Jay sighed pitifully feeling the glare Sunghoon was sending him, “I’m sorry” 
The apology did more harm than good in Sunghoon’s eyes, his grips around the rail burned more feeling the indents forming on his palm from it, “I don’t need your pity apology” He spat feeling the anger that was stowed away rising after the years
“It’s not a pity apology when it’s coming from my heart-”
“Shut up Jay” Sunghoon cut in not wanting to hear his brother’s words anymore, unable to forgive or forget and sweep everything under the rug just because Jay finally decided to apologize
“You still think you can have everything you want without having to break a sweat” Jay flinched from the roughness of Sunghoon’s voice booming to the quiet outside world into his ears “You think a lousy sorry is just going to fix everything?”
The raging build up that has been bubbling in him for all these years that all he needed was Jay’s attempt to apologize for his emotions to burst.
“Keep your apologizes, I don’t need them”
All these years of trying to outshine Jay’s shadow to just be seen by others only left Sunghoon tainted with heartbreak and he’s tired of all of it.
“Hoon-” Jay attempted to meddle in Sunghoon’s growing frantic state wanting to ease his younger brother but was cut off again before he could do so
“Do you still talk to her?” There was a defining moment of silence at the sudden mention of Sorin, the girl that cornered Jay and Sunghoon of no escape to the inevitable fall out between them
The reminder of Sorin’s existence left a bitter taste in both of their mouths. Sunghoon found it hilarious remembering how the only reason she tried so hard to get close to him in the first place was because she had ulterior motives for Jay, not for him. 
Sunghoon who liked her so much was left in the dust after having Jay chosen over him even when his brother was off living in his fantasy life at another school and didn’t even know about her until Sunghoon idiotically introduced them because no matter how hard Sunghoon tried to escape Jay, he would always linger in the dark corner of his life haunting him. 
Jay’s mouth opened and closed eager to deny the obvious truth but his silence spoke louder than anything that could’ve been said. 
Sunghoon lowly chuckle from amusement, there was a twinge of disappointment underneath everything but it diminished because what did he expected from Jay, “That’s all I need to know” 
There was a punch straight to Jay’s gut that was filled with disappointment in himself more than anything else. He knows he can’t go back in time to stop himself from kissing Sorin that night when he was well aware of Sunghoon’s feelings for her.
He knows he’ll never be able to get rid of the regret that’ll live with him forever and he’s okay with that, he’ll let himself live in regret for the rest of his life if it meant a possibility of reconciling with Sunghoon. 
Sunghoon’s hands suddenly loosened around the rail, something immediately taking over his body when he felt the vibration of his phone in his pocket knowing deep down it was you.
There was one thing Jay could never get, to have what Sunghoon has with you and he’ll make sure Jay could only ever dream of it. 
Sunghoon gave a tight lip smile, “Don’t stress over it. There’ll never be a single grudge towards you” He bumped shoulders with Jay before disappearing back into their house dropping his smile just as quickly as he gave it
Digging his hand into his pocket, taking out his phone to see the message left by you. 
You: Have a goodnight
His stoic expression was replaced with a fond smile that only you could ignite from him. He took a moment to admire his lockscreen, you panning his digital camera towards the mirror, his arms gracefully draped over you and the obvious necklace he had gotten you on perfect display.
Without hesitation he grabbed his keys before rushing down the stairs and walking out the front door not forgetting to slam it shut.
Sunghoon: I’m coming over 
Sunghoon: Missed you way too much princess
Jay, who was left on the balcony, heard the echo of the door slamming shut. There was pure silence in the house with the occasional gust of wind swaying by, he looked where Sunghoon once stood. 
He leaned himself against the rails again, running a hand down his face letting out a loud groan, repeating Sunghoon’s words in his head, there'll never be a single grudge towards you. Of course there was a grudge towards him and he couldn’t do anything about it. 
Jay tried to look on the bright side, he should be grateful Sunghoon listened to him for longer than 5 minutes but now all alone with his own heartache, he hoped that if he covered his face long enough it would be enough for him to be forgotten. 
But when he heard his phone ping from a notification it ended his moment of self wallow to bring him back to reality. He pulled out his phone from his back pocket and in growth was the faintest smile. 
He tapped on the notification to be redirected to your new post. 
Skimming through the two scenery pictures, he got to the last picture that looked like it was taken by a digital camera. Only then did he finally see your sweet smile as you looked directly at the camera. 
Whoever took the picture of you knew just the right angles to capture the essence of you. Oh to be able to know you like that. 
Jay felt the harsh tug of his heart as he stared at your picture. You were still as beautiful as he remembered.
He wouldn’t voice this out, how could he, so it laid deep in his heart. When taking his father’s offer to come back home, you lingered in the back of his mind. Did you stay right where he left you? Did you ever find him?  He knew it was reckless and irrational for him to think this. 
But something in him will always crawl back to you.
・・・・・
Sunghoon walked through your unlocked door for him and entered your place. The immediate sense of home washing over him as he slipped off his shoes and placed them next to your neatly placed ones.
Making sure he locked the door behind him, he dragged his body all the way to the cracked open bedroom door and peeked his head inside to see you laying on your bed, scrolling through your phone waiting for him.
From the creaking of your door, you knew it was Sunghoon. You smiled softly before placing your phone on your nightstand to see your bedroom door fully opening and there stood Sunghoon looking at you, a slight pull of his lips towards his cheeks making you find him cute, “You look exhausted” You opted to say instead of what you really thought
Choosing not to respond, he stepped into your room crawling into the familiarity of your bed that he had the luxury of knowing inside and out especially since he was the one that put it together. You welcomed him with open arms as he slotted himself perfectly in between them, his head resting against your chest as he let out a relieved sigh.
The tension in his shoulders dropped as he found his haven in you. 
“Staying over tonight?” You softly asked and with the tickled of his hair on your neck as he nodded you giggled
Your thumb softly creased his head against your chest, “Rest Hoonie” You told just like how he always tells you
However, he had other plans in mind. Sunghoon tilted his head just enough to have his lips graze over your neck before planting feather-like kisses on it. Your hand began holding onto his hair as he slowly sucked on your skin, contrasting his usually hard demeanor. 
His hands ran up your side, slotting them under your back to hold you fully in his arms. Through instinct your body melted, eyes fluttered shut, “Thought you were exhausted” You breathless let out feeling his teeth pulling at your skin making you squeal
“Have a better way to get rid of it”
His mouth trailed all over your neck wanting to mark the unblemished skin he left behind. He wanted to add more to show physical warning for any that dared to get close to you. To keep them far away from you. To make everyone know that you were claimed, that you belonged to him.
You were Sunghoon’s. 
The burning sensation soothed by his tongue gliding over it makes you melt deeper into his touch. Your body surrendering itself to the only person that it can ever fit deep in your heart.
The kisses moved from your neck up to your jaw before finally crashing onto your begging lips. You hummed happily to finally be able to kiss Sunghoon.
You wrapped your arms around his neck as he adjusted himself to mold his body into your laying one, melting your bodies together.
His cold hands roamed under your shirt feeling your hot bare skin making you shiver from the temperature difference but his hands never stopped until they reached your breasts.
He smirked realizing you weren’t wearing anything underneath your shirt. “Seems like you were expecting this” He chuckled, your mouth continuing to move together in sync already knowing how the utilize your lips for the other after many times of being in this very position
His finger teased closer to your hardened nipple before pinching it making you squeal allowing enough room for his tongue to slip in to explore your mouth.
You couldn’t think of anything, not sure if it was from the lack of oxygen or if it was because of him but you didn’t want any of it to stop.
There wasn’t much effort Sunghoon needed to do to have you become a needy mess for him. All he needed to do was give you attention and everything you want and the rest will fall into place.
Your noises were muffled by his mouth as his hands knew exactly when to pull and twist your nipple to send shards of pleasure to surround you whole.
He tried to pull away from the kiss, but you were quick to grab him by the neck chasing after his lips. Loving every moment of you simply falling apart for him, he could live like this forever.
“Needy princess” He whispered into your ear after managing to escape your mouth making you to whine that he stopped kissing you
“Stop teasing- Finish what you started Hoonie” You blabbed through your swollen lips, “Unless you want me to find someone else to satisfy me-”
Sunghoon didn’t allow you to finish your sentence, grabbing your face to make you look at him as he hovered over your body, “Don’t test me” His voice dropped from the teasing tone into something darker, “You know, no one else can ever satisfy you. At least not as good as me”
His hands tightening, squishing your cheeks as he looked dead into your eyes with a smug smile. You looked up at him like he was the only person that existed in your life, the one that cared for you in ways no one else would and his heart swelled.
“You’re mine” 
Underneath the fragile facade lay something greater, something warm and sweet. 
“Say it princess. Who do you belong to?”
Your body became weak, your quick attitude dissolving. He moved your head side to side ushering you to say the possessive words. You weren’t Sunghoon’s but if someone were to ask you on a deeper level you would tell them without hesitation, of course you were his. 
“Yo-you Hoonie… I‘m yours” You murmured through your squished lips and he let go of your face with a pleased gleam
You let out the breath you were holding but it was sucked back in when you felt his hands slip into your pants past your panties and rubbed the pad of this thumb against your throbbing clit.
Immediately looking at him like an animal caught in headlights, you saw his smirk that infuriated you to the point that you always looked forward to it.
Throwing your head back, your mouth fell slack as his fingers grazed your wet entrance in a teasing manner. Your impatient whines grew louder, you needed him to do something, anything to satisfy you.
“Such a good girl” Slipping two fingers past your folds, you loudly gasped at the intrusion 
His pace started out slow even through his hazy mind of just wanting to feel you wrapped around him, he wasn’t a monster. He will always take care of you the way you are meant to be taken care of because if not him, who will?
Feeling the pump of his fingers in and out of you, curling every now and then sends your body to jump, your sheets crumbling under your hands and thrashing body as you let out heavy pants.
Sunghoon always took his time as if to study the inside of your body wondering which move would alwaysbsend you more over the edge.
Slipping his fingers out to deprive you from the sensation a little bit, letting them smooth over your small bundle of nerves before easing them back into you. 
In a scissoring motion, he carefully opened you. With the opening he managed to slip in a third finger making your hand fly across your mouth to stop the loud moans daring to slip through.
Sunghoon’s jaw clenched, shoving his fingers knuckle deep into you making you wail into your hand. “Why so quiet princess? Y’know I love hearing you” He snickered seeing how hard you were trying to keep quiet
“Don-Don’t- w-ant peop-people to hear” You pitfully let out clenching around his fingers the moment they curled into you. He can’t have that
He tooted his tongue shaking his head, “Oh no, let them hear know how good I’m making you feel”
“Let everyone know I’m the one making you feel like this” He whispered into the shell of your ear and your body and mind flared 
You reluctantly let go of your mouth noticing how Sunghoon’s finger picked up in pace as he smiled seeing you listen to him, “Hoonie…Hoonie-” Your gasps was frequent as you rested a hand on his shoulders for support feeling the familiar tie forming in your stomach daring to snap 
“Let go for me princess” His fingers continued to bury themselves as deep as they could in you as his thumb found a spot right on your neglected nub making you snap in half
His moving fingers in and on you made clench around his fingers until your orgasm crashed like a tidal wave over you.
Your body shivered as he continued to use his fingers to help ride out your high. In a weak attempt you tried to stop his moving fingers yet, he kept going. You let out a loud whine, picking at his bracelet to garner his attention. 
Smiling at your soft pulls at his bracelet, he brought his free hand to pick at your necklace. Your dazed expression was enough to have him pull out his fingers and out of your pants to see how you drenched his hand with your juices.
The side smirk changed into him opening his mouth bringing his fingers to taste you. He groaned the moment his fingers made contact at his tastebud, loving every second of it.
Instead of cringing, you softened to mush as he licked his fingers clean, popping his salivated covered fingers out before shoving them into your welcoming mouth.
Without words being exchanged you wrapped your lips around them, faintly tasting yourself mixed with his saliva on your tongue. “You’re the sweetest, don’t you agree?” He chuckled as he wiggled his fingers in your mouth having you gag by how deep they were
Sunghoon admired how you looked. How you took anything he gives you without hesitation. His heart fluttered.
He pulled his fingers out and the faint string of your saliva connected his finger to you made him let out a low groan.
Your legs squeezed together as you could feel the trickling of your leaking hole pouring out, “Please” desperate pleas fell out of your mouth like a broken record, “Please. Please. Please” Whining loudly, you looked up to Sunghoon with pathetic eyes
“Words princess. I’ll give you anything. Just tell me what you want” 
It bothered you because he knew exactly what you wanted but he wasn’t going to give it to you unless you said it out loud for the confined space of your room, the world watching, and him to hear. 
“You. I need you” 
Sunghoon’s lips tugged upwards hearing you. His smile was different from other times. He smiled at you and he could feel the look—the pure emotion pooling in his eyes towards you. He gulped harshly, closing his eyes shut before you could notice how he was looking at you. “Then let me take care of you”
His hand played with the waistband of your pants before tugging them down, the cold breeze hit your now bare core when your pants and panties were discarded somewhere in your room. 
You closed your legs tightly because no matter how many times he’s seen you like this and worse, you still felt shy. “Nu uh let me see you” Sunghoon’s hands bent your knees before prying open your legs open and there he saw your glistening entrance
The magnetic trance brought him in and he placed a soft kiss onto your covered stomach before slotting his head right in between your legs feeling his hot breath breezing your wet covered hole for it to be replaced by his tongue gliding over your swollen clit all the way down your folds. 
Your hands flew to his hair feeling how he opened his mouth wide enough to gather as much of your arousal as possible. He didn’t care if his senses were being all filled with you, he rather it be you than anyone else. 
Repeating the motion over and over again, his tongue lapped before teasingly protruding at your gaping hole knowing how much you loved to be filled by him in any way. 
As he tugged on the sensitive nub with his teeth, you screeched, your hands pulled at his hair harsher as the more he ate you out. The longer you felt his warm mouth closing and opening with his tongue gliding all around making a mess, the more your back arched while he kept your legs wide open for him.
“Taste so fucking sweet” He groaned against your core as he dragged his tongue all over as you continued to spill all over his mouth
He rarely came up for air, losing himself in you and the more he lapped at your leaking pussy, the more it led to the twisting of your daring to squeeze out the build up in you again, “C-close! ’m close, Ho-Hoonie” 
“Come on my tongue” He said in one breath before attaching himself back onto you 
He sucked on your clit using his tongue to soothe it, only to do it all over again while his fingers slipped into your gushing hole, pumping in and out of your in an irregular place to help elevate you closer.
Feeling the tie becoming done the more you lost yourself on his tongue, you whimpered as you came all over him, your body shaking with a loud moan and a harsh pull of his hair as he drank up all of your release in satisfaction that he ripped yet another orgasm out of you. 
His humming vibrated up from your core all the way to your mind in a split second making your body have an immediate reaction. You tried to pull yourself away from the sensitivity, already too much for you to handle but Sunghoon locked his arms under your knees holding you in place giving one last drag of his tongue on your smeared covered pussy. 
He pulled himself back up just enough to face you which showed the bottom half of his face covered fully by your release.
You felt the warm blush creep onto your face from embarrassment seeing the mess you left on him but his reassuring smile bloomed something else in your heart. It’s the very thing you’ve been trying to ignore whenever you’re with Sunghoon. 
Noticing how your eyes trailed off somewhere else he softly stroked your head gaining your attention back onto him easily, your confused eyes stared at him before leaving as you saw the same reassuring warm smile still on his face.
You smiled loopily up to him and Sunghoon felt the thud of his heart against his chest. 
You barely could keep your eyes open making him chuckle and ultimately deciding to ignore his own problems, “Get some rest princess” His tone soft and mellow as he soothed your sides but he let out a yelp when you suddenly wrapped your arms around his neck and dragged him down to your lips
Vigorously shaking your head, you cringed at the taste of yourself but with how easily he reciprocated the kiss your mind washed that feeling away.
With his body flushed against yours, you tiredly rubbed yourself against his obvious hard on making the hold on your waist tighten. 
He groaned louder than he wanted feeling the friction again his erection, “You don’t have to” He tried to reassure you but you only pressed your lips harder together to shut him up
Your hips moved faster, feeling his clothed cock rubbing your aching core, soaking his pants and bulge. You were going to drive him insane but you’re the only person he’s willing to give up his sanity for. 
Pulling himself away from the kiss, he fumbled with his pants as he hastily tried to remove them as fast as he could. He needed to free himself from the aching hold from his pants right now. 
Kicking them off somewhere, he easily removed his shirt and right before you was Sunghoon in all his glory. Admiring his build and the muscle definition from all the time he’s at the gym told you that after the chaos that was your family, you were finally being rewarded with the peace of what's yours. 
Looking all around, you saw his raging cock standing all high and mighty, desperately begging for you to send him to the only place he could ever reach with you.
The fire in you ignited when his hands grabbed the ends of your shirt to lift it just enough to display your upper body to him.
Your neck glowed with his old and new hickies all over your neck and he felt satisfaction grow more knowing you were marked all for him. Trailing down to the in between of the crevice of your breasts before engulfing one of them in his mouth and the other in his hand. 
Hoonie. Sunghoon. Mine. 
Your mind was compromised and that’s exactly what he wanted.
Not realizing how one of his hands let go of your breast it wasn’t until you felt his tip slipping into your entrance making you realize he was distracting you from the sudden stretch of his cock opening you like how it always did. 
You hissed never able to get used to how he stretches you out no matter how many times you’ve done this with him. “Hoonie” You whimpered
Sunghoon’s hand let go of his shaft that was guiding him to softly engulf yours.
He rested his head in between the crack of your neck and shoulder as you sucked him into your hole, “Taking me like such a good girl” His mouth let out a strained groan feeling you wrap around him
“My good girl” He whispered for himself when he knew you couldn’t hear
Your shudders far too loud to pick up on what he said trying to adjust yourself to his size already feeling him so deep inside of you.
It wasn’t until you gave him a weak nod that he could move did he feel the wonders of your pussy again.
Sunghoon adjusted your falling shirt to make sure your beautifully marked breasts were displayed as his index finger traced over each of his marks on your skin before having it land on your hip stabilizing himself to shallowly move in and out of you causing the little ounce of control you had left snap as his tip hit the same spot he knew to have you unravel for him. 
Sunghoon knew you far too well, he knew how to take care of you, to hold you in the palm of his hand. 
He worked day and night memorizing everything he could learn about you. 
The slow drags of his cock in and of you made you grow increasingly needier for something harder, faster, you moved your hips to meet his slow steady thrust, to feel him deeper. “Oh?” He chuckled out raising an eyebrow noticing your action 
Putty. You were nothing but mere putty in his hands. “Faster Hoonie please” Your voice cracked with each word, “Can take it like a good girl promise” Your delirious state made him swoon and how could he ever deny you of your pleas for him
“You’ll be a good girl for me?” He hummed, one harsh thrust sending you further into your dazed out state before having it replaced by the precious shallow ones, “Take everything I give you?” He huffed out as you weakly nodded your head
You’ll be his good girl forever.
“Don’t regret it princess” The wind knocked out of your lungs with his instantaneous change when a harsh thrust followed after another hit your insides
You moaned loudly as his hands held your body in place he slammed his hips harder and faster into you in a pace that made you euphoric.
Even though he couldn’t see it, he could feel it and he knows you must feel it too. You just had to. 
His hand that engulfed yours soon slotted in between, interlinking your fingers together and instantly you held his hand back with equal force that he held yours with. 
This was something neither of you initiated before but it felt right. To hold each other like this. Giving up for each other.
The sounds of your arousal making it easier for Sunghoon to glide was obscene but to him it was perfect.
His tip kissing your cervix had your eyes rolling to the back of your head as you held tighter on his hand holding yours, never wanting to let him go “Hoonie. Hoonie!” You chanted your nickname for him as it was the only thing you could ever know 
“Look at me” He told but no matter how hard you tried to open your eyes they would close the moment they opened, the pleasure taking over you 
But just as easily as he gave you that pleasure, the easier he was to take it away from you from the still of his movement. Your hand loosened from his but not enough to let it go.
Letting out a whine trying to move your hip to continue the motion of his cock slipping in and out of you
The harsh grab of your chin turned your head to him, “I said look at me” Sunghoon’s chilling voice made your glassy eyes open, the beads of sweat forming on his forehead making some of his hair stick to it that you weakly pushed away.
You wanted to see Sunghoon, all of him, nothing blocking you regardless of whatever state you could ever be in. 
His and yours eyes locked, your held hands gripped onto each other harder. This moment was too much, far too intimate to just be friends but maybe because it was more than that.
Maybe it was always just more than that, something beyond casual friendship and deep down there was possible reciprocation. 
He wasn’t helping as he let out a warm smile landing a kiss on your lips that wasn’t like the other kisses you’ve received from him before. This being more passionate and dare you say loving.
It was unclear what this would entail for you and Sunghoon but there was a desperate search for something unknown that hadn’t been completed. 
In this moment, there was an underlying fear eating at Sunghoon and it was his damn brother, Jay, in the back of his subconscious mind.
But knowing Sunghoon the way you did, you were able to feel what he felt. All his fears, worries, needs, etc. You felt them im you.
In your attempts, you allowed him to kiss you however way he pleased. Harsh tugs of your lips before becoming easier and softer letting your lips get lost in each other, memorizing the familiar world that neither of you ever wanted to leave if it wasn’t for the reason to finally address the pittering of your hearts. 
Sunghoon rested his sweaty forehead with yours when he pulled away from the kiss with a heavy pant.
Neither of you looked away and you gave a weak smile, warming his heart that he nearly slipped out the few words that tugged on his heart that he couldn’t dare say out loud at least not yet. 
Still buried inside of you, he began moving his hips again catching you off guard at the sudden movement. You were too caught up in the moment and the fluttering of your heart.
“Say my name” Sunghoon softly told, slipping fully out of your only leaving his tip in you before slamming right back into you
His previous pace came back as a carnal desire in him drove him forward, he continued the snap of his hips against you wanting to embroider himself external and internally of your entire being, he gripped onto the hand he never let go of, digging his fingers into your knuckles “Say my name princess. Fucking say it” 
You mimicked his action, digging your own fingers into his knuckles holding onto his hand for the only support you ever needed, “Sunghoon” The singular call of his full name, not his nickname of any sort but the fullest form of him snapped his breaking point as he rammed into you with the intent of making you his.
“Don’t stop. Keep saying it” He groaned, “I’ll make you all for me” Those words made you clench around him, feeling the arousal seeping out of you more that had him slipping out by just how wet you were
“All for you Sunghoon” You wailed not caring how deep down you meant those words 
“Mine…” He murmured the words to himself as it settled into the furthest crevice of his mind, “All fucking mine” His relentless ruts made your insides tingle in need as the build up in your stomach grew more
“Gonna come Hoo- Sunghoon, going to-” You cried out feeling the build up daring to snap in that moment
“Come for me princess. Cream on my cock” He roughly spoke in your ear, “Give it to me” Your walls clenched around him the closer you reach your climax, he groaned as you hugged him that made his mind zeroed on reaching his orgasm with you
His thrust got sloppy and messy as he was nearing his climax, “Almost there, just a little more princess” 
“Going to take everything I give you like how you always do” He said
Your hands holding each other’s, the sounds of his hips meeting yours, the lewd sound with the unmistakable smell of pure sex in the air surrounding the two of you was ecstasy. 
His mouth hangs opens, strained noises beginning to twist his tongue as his mind tried to catch up to his heart, “I-I L-L…”
What is he thinking? What he is so sure of saying that it’s at the tip of his tongue, ready to fall at any moment. “Fuck Princess” He deeply sighed out instead
What was he thinking of saying to you?
You felt the twitch of Sunghoon’s cock bury as far as it could as he stilled his messy thrust to allow the spurts of his cum shoot into you making you moan at the feeling prompting your own orgasm.
You covered him in your arousal as Sunghoon left all the sides of your walls covered with him.
The tightening hold on your hand, you screwed your eyes shut, your mind too hazy to pick up the sincerity of the almost said words, “So perfect for me” He said which didn’t feel right to say leaving a bitter feel in his mouth when there was something he rather say, express what his heart screamed
Because his heart knew what it felt. 
Not wanting to let go of him, you weakly wrapped your arm around him, the uncomfortable feel of your shirt bundled up over your chest didn’t bother you in the slightest as you cared about your bodies stuck together.
You felt the weak thrust he gave to push his cum further into you making you shudder through your heavy pants but when he was slipping out you tugged at his body to stop him, “Stay inside please” 
You don’t know why you suddenly spoke your mind. Usually you would’ve been okay just sleeping in his arms but this time something, you just wanted him as close to you as possible.
There was something kindled in you and you trusted Sunghoon, you knew him. Like how he always promised, he’ll take care of you.
Even when you didn’t know where, who or why you needed saving, Sunghoon would know exactly what to do and he’ll be at your beck and call. 
The exhaustion catching up to you, your eyelids felt heavy as you slipped in and out of your daze. Sunghoon drowsily chuckled, nodding his head leaving the same ticklish manner against your making you weakly giggle.
“Anything for you” He kissed the side of your face before wrapping his arms around your sore body to cradle you close to him
“Rest princess” He whispered warmly 
Your heavy eyelids finally close, allowing you to be completely surrounded by Sunghoon as you stay in his arms, his fingers making small circles on your back.
Too far deep into consciousness and unconsciousness, he whispered something so low that you weren’t able to pick up on it, but the soft place of his lips against your forehead made you smile. 
Your fatigued body rested in Sunghoon’s embrace just like how you always did. Your breath evening out as you could finally rest.
“I’ll give up everything just for you princess. Just say the word and I’m yours…” 
ᥫ᭡.
Today was an exceptionally hot humid day. Jay was supposed to be out for the rest of the day but he couldn’t bear the heat any longer, it was making him irritated so he made a u-turn to head back home deeming he could deal with everything later. 
And the moment he walked through the door, he expected to be greeted with silence as always but instead he heard fits of laughter and loud screams following the splashes of water from their pool.
He furrowed his eyebrows quickly taking off his shoes rushing over to the patio. He didn’t think anyone dared to use the pool, the wound of their mother’s death still being too deep but times are different, people change and old scars could become healed. 
He stopped dead in his tracks hearing Sunghoon raw true laughter, his eyes peeking through the small crack of the opened door to see the wide smile his brother had showing all of his teeth with his teeth like fangs peeking through.
He’s never seen Sunghoon smile like this. 
When Sunghoon disappeared from sight it brought Jay back to his senses, he made his way to the patio door prying it open, “Hoon?” 
Now Jay wasn’t sure what to expect when he pushed open the door but you were at the bottom of the list.
Sunghoon’s arms wrapped around your shoulder holding you close to him, his head resting in the crevice of your neck and shoulder, your wet clothes clinging to your body leaving little to no imagination of your figure.
Sunghoon felt chills run up his spine at the call of the nickname he hated so much. His eyes traveled up to see the horror in Jay’s face. His arms tightened around you to keep you close to him, noticing how your laughter came to a sudden stop, your shoulders tensing at Jay’s sudden appearance at the door. 
The moment you caught sight of Jay, you instantly pried off Sunghoon who was beyond reluctant to let you go but you somehow managed to succeed.
Your eyes caught Jay’s and he felt his world come to a complete stop unable to singly comprehend what you were doing in front of him, in his house with Sunghoon or even why Sunghoon had his arms wrapped around you with his head resting on your shoulder as if you were his. 
Past the quite literal horror on his face like he had seen a ghost, you could feel the sharp gaze from him staring right at you before noticing the earrings on the side of his ear and the butterfly birthmark on the side of his neck.
“Hi, you must be Sunghoon’s twin brother, Jay, right?” You don’t recall any news of Jay’s return from Sunghoon, it must’ve been a surprise for him when he went to the airport that one time
Jay tried to find any type of coherent way to form his sentence but whenever he tried to speak, it would either be muttered gibberish or straight up nothing, just like always.
You nervously gulped at the silence, adjusting your wet clothes to at least have it stick to you less as you gave an awkward smile towards him. 
Realizing that he hasn’t looked away, not even sure if he’s blinked the entire time he was staring at you. He gave a quick nod, not trusting his voice to come out.
Yet, upon seeing your awkward smile being replaced with one more genuine did he feel the flip of his heart. 
“What are you doing here?” The question directed at him brought some sense back into him to reality
Jay managed to look away from you to the harsh glare sent his way by Sunghoon. He jumped but narrowed his eyes to mimic his brother’s glare towards him because why was Sunghoon looking at him like that when it should be the other way around. 
You looked between the brothers noticing how the tension was rising higher the second neither of them spoke or looked away from each other, “Uhm-” You tried to say something, anything that could help ease the tension but Sunghoon grabbed your wrist before you could say more
“Let’s go” Sunghoon walked past his brother grabbing a discarded towel to wrap around you escorting you back into the house 
“Wait Sunghoon-” You tried to gain back your balance confused why he was acting like this in the first place so you pulled your arm away with a loud huff
You held the towel close to your body, staring at Sunghoon with confusion and seeing the look on your face caused his skin to crawl in unease. 
You turned your back to Sunghoon to look at Jay whose been watching your every move, “It’s nice to finally meet you Jay” Your smile that Sunghoon swore to be the only one to receive it was now being shown to the very person he never wanted to experience it
“It’s nice to finally meet you too…” Jay’s response was short and gentle but it felt as if there was underlying meaning behind it
You thought of how he didn’t ask for your name but Jay didn’t need to know your name. He’s already thought of it countlessly to the point that it’s engraved into his mind forever.
It wasn’t until now that he realized the dainty necklace on your neck was the same exact one on Sunghoon’s wallpaper. 
That bastard.
There was a tug at your fingers that made you look away from Jay back to see Sunghoon looking at you with pleading eyes, you let out a sigh of defeat before waving goodbye to Jay.
Pleased to finally see you walking into the house Sunghoon’s hand hovered over your back wanting to put as much distance between you and Jay as quickly as possible.
When he stepped one foot into the house, he stopped in his tracks, “Sunghoon” The usage of his full name had his head turning to the side just enough to see his brother
He knew what that call of his name meant, the challenge it raised.
Turning his head back to see you waiting inside of the house for him, he didn’t say anything, stepping into the house to leave Jay alone on the patio. Jay determined he was starting to get sick and tired of seeing the back of Sunghoon’s head. 
“Thanks for the heads up” You sneered just loud enough for Sunghoon to hear you 
Choosing not to respond, he just ushered you up to his room, closing the door behind him hoping that it was quiet enough for Jay to hear the faint click of him locking the door. 
“Why didn’t you tell me that your brother was back?” You asked earning a heavy sigh from Sunghoon who unwrapped the towel around you after finding a new change of clothes for you
“He was supposed to be gone for the rest of the day” He muttered more so himself rather than for you, “It wasn’t important for you to know so why bother telling you about useless stuff” Able to clearly hear him this time your lips tugged downwards as he handed you his clothes for you to change into
You deeply sighed taking the clothes, “That’s not the point. The point is that you tell me beforehand to avoid these type of moments” 
Sunghoon’s eyebrows creased downwards, a side tug of mouth down at your words, “Type of moments?”
The moments that made it seem like you and Sunghoon were something more than just friends who fuck, that you were his and that he was yours.
If others believe facade that surrounded you and Sunghoon then there was bo possibility of getting confused of what you are Sunghoon are.
If no one was confused then there was no way you could be confused by it. 
You should’ve been more careful of your words to avoid this topic but too caught up in it, you hadn’t realized what you were getting yourself into, “You know…” Your voice faded off unsure if you wanted to even finish the sentence
“No, I don’t know. What do you mean by it?” His already agitated voice only grew more, he wanted clarification but you kept your mouth shut placing the set of clothes on the nearest thing that could hold it, “What do you mean by it?” Sunghoon asked again which only made you regret ever saying anything
Wanting to move on from the topic you dismissed it, “Nothing Hoonie” You murmured picking up the set of clothes again to walk out of his room into the bathroom passing by the same portrait of Sunghoon and Jay hanging on the wall 
You looked at it now being able to see the portrait in its entirety. Seeing how both Sunghoon and Jay looked ahead, the same stoic and empty expression on both of their faces.
There was something Sunghoon wasn’t telling you, you knew that much but you trusted him more than you should’ve, your heart only seeing the good in him.
You just didn’t know if that was your biggest mistake.
“It’s excessive, isn’t it?” 
You whipped your head to the sudden deep voice to see Jay standing right next to you copying your stare at the large picture.
Seeing Jay without the interference of Sunghoon or the feel of any suffocating silence and tension were you then reminded of the gnawing thought. Why did Jay feel so familiar to you? 
He could feel your gaze on him and hesitantly he looked at you. Seeing you in person reminded him of just how deep in the pit he was in because of you and it was like no time had changed.
He noticed you holding a change of clothes and he could instantly tell they were Sunghoon’s and it felt like a punch to his stomach. His nails tugged into his thumb noticing the necklace peeking out of the damped shirt, “That’s a nice necklace” He softly commented 
Your fingers unintentionally played with the said necklace, softly smiling to yourself at the reminder of who gave you the necklace and the deeper meaning behind it “Thank you, it was a gift from someone…Very special to me” 
The words very special to me dreaded something in him but he tried to look past it, he knew if he questioned further he might get an answer he doesn’t like but seeing the soft smile on your face as you spoke of it, if it meant having a conversation with you, he’d be willing to put up with anything. 
“So how did you and Sunghoon meet?” 
The question made you drop your necklace to fall against your neck. It was a simple question filled with curiosity, you knew that but you feared you’d slip deeper than you wanted to.
You nibbled on the bottom of your lip trying to find the proper way to answer his question. “Well he uh…” Your throat becoming dry “We became friends through some tutoring circumstances”
You didn’t notice Jay’s frown hearing your answer. Sunghoon must’ve insisted you to become his tutor just because of who you were, to him. It made his hands ball into a hard fist.
Deep down he knew it wasn’t as simple as that, there was more to you and Sunghoon’s ‘friendship’.
Through the clench of his jaw he gave a smile, “That’s surprising to hear that” Jay mumbled making your raise an eyebrow
He knows better than to have his emotions get the best of him but why should he cover for Sunghoon? Because he was his brother? No. Jay’s morals are greater than that.
“Sunghoon was a straight A student his entire life so just to hear he needed a tutor is a little shocking…” When Jay was going to say more he stopped, he saw the innocent oblivious look in your eyes as his words were conflicted with everything you could have possibly known about Sunghoon
His eyes looked around before landing on the ground before looking back up to you. It wasn’t for Sunghoon’s sake but rather for yours. He didn’t know the full story and he couldn’t risk hurting you simply based on his assumption, which he knew deep down are to be highly true.
He sighed out a tight smile shrugging his shoulder, “It must’ve been a burnout after all those years finally catching up to him” Jay gave a comforting smile to ease your tensed shoulders
You shoulders dropped, a silent relief washing over as another moment where neither of you said anything took over until you broke the silence, “I heard you’re studying abroad, that’s amazing” You smiled making his heart twist in itself because even when you were so close, you were still out of reach
He let out an airy chuckle, tilting his head to the side enjoying the compliment you gave him because to you, it may have been something so small but to him it meant the world.
“How is it? Do you enjoy it? Where do you study? What do you study?” There was a certain gleam in your eyes after each question that made them sparkle, the curiosity you now have for him was the same that he had for you made his heart warm
But the bubble popped the moment Jay heard the click of a door opening turning to it to see Sunghoon walking out catching you and him in front of the very same picture he caught you the first time you saw it but this time, you had Jay beside you.
Sunghoon clenched his jaw in distastefulness before harshly moving his eyes from his brother onto you without saying a single word only to walk back into his room, closing the door behind him.
You deeply sighed, rubbing your forehead in some type of annoyance with Sunghoon’s confusing temper but still managing to have the greatest patiences to deal with it just because it was him.
“I think it’s time we end it here” Jay softly spoke causing you to dryly chuckle showcasing a small smile making something tickle in his brain
“Yeah, I think so too” Your eyes trailed after him as he turned around to face you with a side smile that caused your own smile to grow on your face
Instead of walking towards the bathroom, you walked towards Sunghoon’s room having Jay watch you with a deep frown. He hated that you were walking towards his brother’s room, being stuck to know that Sunghoon knew of you in ways that he dreamed of ever knowing.
“Hey” You turned hearing the soft call out to see Jay giving you a closed smile that more than enough to show a vulnerable side to him
“Next time we catch each other like that, let’s learn about each other”
ꨄ︎
It wasn’t until a few hours later that Sunghoon drove you back home, only for him to return past midnight. He was aware of Jay’s deep precision and care for his sleep schedule that he expected him to be long asleep when he returned home, but to his surprise, Jay sat dead center in the hallway, arms folded watching the door until Sunghoon walked through the door. 
“What the- What are you doing?” Sunghoon jumped back seeing the dead blank stare his brother was giving him and even more surprised to even see him up this late in the night
“You’re a fucking bastard but you already knew that, didn’t you?” The chair screeched against the tile floors as Jay stood from it, an obvious ache in his body for how long he was sitting there but there were greater things that mattered
Sunghoon’s jaw tightened watching his brother. He knew exactly what Jay meant, he expected this reaction, he worked for this very moment, this is what he wanted? But underneath the harsh glare he was being given, he saw a familiar craze, one that he knew far too well. 
He was caught off guard when Jay’s hand suddenly grabbed his collar, “How did you find out about her?” Sunghoon’s eyes widen just for a moment before dropping his initial shock to show a stoic expression instead 
He’ll gladly meet his brother halfway, to push and corner him to the edge. This wasn’t some unresolved fight between them from the past waiting to be fixed. The wound was fresh this time, open and gushing for immediate attention, “By finding and meeting her” 
Jay bit back his tongue with a shake of his head, he let out a laughing scoff before lightly shaking Sunghoon by his collar, “How did you find out about her Sunghoon?” Instead of using the usual nickname he always used to address his brother, he used his full name, this time Jay’s tone was much darker and lower than any other time he spoke to his brother
“Should’ve thrown away your pathetic diary” The mention of the sacred notebook made Jay shove his brother harshly knocking him off his balance
“You were waiting until I was gone to go through my stuff” Jay laughed almost manic as the pieces slowly fell into place, “Should’ve thrown your pathetic dignity with it when you found it” He sneered making Sunghoon scoff
Sunghoon grabbed Jay’s wrist, tightening around it to forcefully remove Jay’s hold to push him off of him, “You’re one to talk” He muttered under his breath noticing how his brother looked away from him, eyes set on the floor 
“You’re going to regret ever thinking about going near her” Jay quietly warned making Sunghoon sarcastically laugh
“Oh no, you’ll be the one going to regret coming back” Sunghoon gave a tight smile that was too menacing
“Should’ve stayed right where you were” Each word he said, the taps against Jay’s chest only grew harsher “You didn’t have to come back” Sunghoon looked at Jay’s eyes dropping the menacing smile 
Realizing now that taking the harsh approach towards Sunghoon would lead nowhere, he needed to think of anything that could make his brother realize what’s at stake, who's at stake but it hurt him.
Jay never wanted this to happen—any of it but he thinks he can live with that for the rest of his life because now it was you who was at stake, “You’re going to hurt her Hoon”
Ignoring the use of the nickname again Jay has been using ever since they were kids, those simple words made Sunghoon loosen his hold on Jay’s collar, a ringing in his ear muffled everything else around him making it feel like he was submerged in water.
His breathing became heavy, his chest rising and falling with each heave. Hurt you? He’d never dare let alone even think about it.
“I would never hurt her” He mumbled to retaliate his brother’s words, his voice growing weak
“And what do you think you’re doing? You’re using her Hoon just to get back at me because you know it’s the only way to get to me” Jay’s soft voice filled the defying silence that Sunghoon didn’t dare to break, he couldn’t defend himself to say it wasn’t true when it was nothing but the truth
But he’d never admit it, afraid of the consequences of his own actions coming to haunt him, “No… You don’t know anything! You don’t just get to swoop in and mess with my head like this”  
“Just because you didn’t get what you wanted doesn’t mean I should be deprived of what you lost” 
Jay can’t let his emotions get the best of him, he knows that but he can’t hold himself back anymore, “Sunghoon, get it through your thick skull that she is not yours to have!” He snapped
“You could never care about her nearly as much as how I care about her, you only care about getting back at me in the worst way possible” Jay harshly patted his chest, “I like her! I care about her! You don’t” 
“You only care about yourself” Jay spat making Sunghoon let out a loud laugh to stop his rant from going on anymore
Having to listen to Jay was like cats scratching a blackboard, it was driving him mad. His chest was tightening, it was getting harder to breath, “No Jay, you’re the one that needs to get it through your thick skull that it fucking hurts doesn’t it?” 
“The betrayal, the feeling of losing what could’ve been yours”
“How does it feel Jongseong?” 
When was the last time Sunghoon referred to Jay by his other name? He can’t remember.
Maybe it was when their mother was around or was it all in his head, a dream that he had that Sunghoon for once called his name warmly 
“I’m sick of having to fill the void that you left behind just to please others to reach their expectations” The conflict in Sunghoon’s mind cleared and at the end of the dark tunnel surrounding him, there stood you waiting for him with the smile he could never live without
“Did you ever think that maybe you’re the one that could never care for her the way I do?” Sunghoon raised an eyebrow seeing how his question affected Jay, how it settled in his mind as his face contorted into a sour expression
“You’re no good for her Sunghoon” Jay gritted through his teeth raising his head to meet Sunghoon’s cold gaze
Now unfazed, not a single spare of remorse in his eyes, he felt lighter, “And you’re just so perfect for her?” He asked staring directly towards his brother to get an answer out of him 
The question made Jay think. If Sunghoon, his own twin brother was no good for you, was he any better than him? He didn’t have any answer to the question. 
Sunghoon’s rested face now plastered a smug smile as he looked at Jay who was yet to say anything. He patiently waited for his brother to say anything but to his amusement, he didn’t have anything else to say.
For the first time in a long time, Jay was silenced. 
“She’s mine Jay. This time make sure to stay the fuck away” 
・・・・・
When you peered open the door, you didn’t expect to see Sunghoon. You had just seen him not even 2 hours ago after he left your place but seeing him back so soon confused you. But when he lifted his head, you saw the pure exhaustion in his eyes.
Your confused demeanor melted right then and there fully opening the door with your arms wide open for him. 
From any previous exhaustion, this was different. It was something you saw in the mirror for many years after finally breaking free from it, mostly thanks to Sunghoon.
You wondered what made him like this, now it was rare for Sunghoon to be vulnerable around others but with you, it always came naturally. 
But even still, it worried you during the very few times he got like this. 
Whenever he needed comfort, he knew he had you. You’ll welcome him into the haven he grew far too comfortable in. He just hopes it was the same for you, that whenever, wherever or however you needed him, he’d do anything in a heartbeat. 
He didn’t need to say anything, crashing his body into your welcoming one, his arms snaking to cling onto your body afraid he would lose you to the unthinkable.
Damn Jay coming in and messing with his head. He would never hurt you, never would think about it in a million years. 
You were his friend. No. You were more? You meant something to him. You held such a high value to him that Jay could never reach. He couldn’t.
You softly creased his back, immediately noticing his shoulders dropping, the loud relieved sigh coming out of him as his head dug further into your neck.
The haunting thoughts finally left him alone. Whenever he was with you, all his worries washed away.
Even though he wasn’t your boyfriend and you weren’t his girlfriend, in these moments all could be forgotten and what wasn’t remembered didn’t destroy anyone.
Yet, why did it feel so wrong to think of it like that? Even if you weren’t, you were his, there was no denying it.
He wants to be selfish for once, he wants things in life too. He’s grateful and thankful for the greatness that is you in his life.
But he wants something. He needs anything that wasn’t what the two of you already have together. Maybe soon, he can consider it.  
Even since you met, you saw him for him, not as one of his father’s notorious sons or in the shadows to be forgotten of and most certainty not as Jay’s twin brother.
You knew him in his purest form as Park Sunhoon. 
And he didn’t need the validation of his father anymore. He doesn’t need to be healed from the scars left behind from Sorin. And he most certainly doesn’t need Jay’s apologies.
All he needs is you and he’s set for life.
ᥫ᭡.
Jay pranced around his room. Sunghoon’s words played in his head on a constant loop even long after he left. She’s mine Jay. No you weren’t. 
You were meant to be his.
But instead, you only knew of his brother, not knowing a single thing about him. 
The spiral of his mind only became worse the more he thought about it. There were times, much easier times, when Sunghoon didn’t have a single clue about your existence and you were the center of Jay’s life. 
How different life could’ve been if he didn’t care and only gained the courage to go up to you back then. Maybe then he wouldn’t have to go to sleep every night picturing a life where he and Sunghoon got along. That you remained the center of his life. But he could only dream. 
He scrambled through his drawers and every single crevice of his room until he found the intacted notebook stored in the very place he left it years ago. Jay didn’t think Sunghoon had the decency of leaving it right where he found it. 
Flipping through the pages, he felt the pull of his heart strings as he read over his scribbled handwriting ranting on countless pages. Sunghoon managing to read his handwriting let alone understand it when he couldn’t even understand it himself was amusing.
There were far too many words, expressive words at that and so many uncompleted thoughts and feelings that never got shared. 
Your soft hand wrapped around his wrist, dragging him through the unfamiliar grounds of the school on his first day saving him from the consequences of arriving at the new school late. 
He never got to tell you how grateful he was for you that day, it was more than you could ever imagine.
He searched for you all over the new school grounds in hopes to find you and when he did, he thought it’d be like any regular interaction that the gratitude words would fall from his mouth easily but he couldn’t even move his body, his feet glued to the ground, his throat drying up and the palms of his hands clamping from sweat as he only looked at you from afar. 
He couldn’t even approach you without breaking down. Now times are different and he can somewhat hold a conversation with you but back then the only way he could even attempt to talk to you was through sticky notes he’d leave on your desk everyday.
It started off with simple words of affirmation telling you to have a good day, etc. but it soon grew to him leaving the notes you missed on your desk to his attempts in making you smile or even better laugh whenever he noticed your mood dropped. 
He’d take care of you the way you took care of him and it was until later he noticed his care for you changed into more, beyond just being grateful.
It was the way you would smile softly at his sticky note, quickly pocketing it before anyone could see what he wrote for your eyes only or how your eyes would drop from the lack of sleep trying your best to stay awake but would jump wide awake whenever someone managed to get your attention. 
It must be nice to experience your attention, something his own brother was able to know but not him.
When he stopped on the very last entry he ever wrote it was a reminder of his first and only unrequited heartbreak. The basket endlessly filled to the brim of things you liked, a handwritten letter which he poured his heart into and in the middle with clear bold letters, ‘May I please take you out?’.
It was meant to be given to you the day you finally knew of Jay, that you saw him for his pure dedication to you, for what he can be to you.
Yet, he stupidly got distracted. Too focused and caught up in someone else that was never meant to be his in the first place. 
Before he realized it, he already lost before he could even start.
He should’ve left the house earlier, he should’ve ignored Sorin who was waiting outside the front door. He never should’ve invited her in to catch up after so long of not seeing each other.
He should’ve done nothing.
And yet, he was leaning in to meet her halfway, to catch her lips with his even when he knew, when he fucking listened to Sunghoon confess his feelings for Sorin during the few times they every truly talked not as friends or strangers but rather as actual brothers. 
Jay has many regrets, of course he does, no one is perfect. But he sure as hell was not going to add another regret to the list. You don’t belong to Sunghoon, you weren’t his. 
You belonged with him.
You belonged to Jay. 
ꨄ︎
Jay walks over to the door, opening it after hearing the singular doorbell ring and he was surprised to see you on the other side, “Oh” Your resting face soon bloomed with a polite smile as you registered it was him 
He should’ve been happy to receive your smile, but it felt too formal, too forced. It was the smile that Sunghoon didn't receive but everyone else did.
“Hi Jay, I hope you’ve been well. I’m sorry for suddenly dropping by. I’m just looking for Sunghoon” You peered over his shoulder into the house before looking back into his eyes
Something dark consumed Jay whole and there was a recurring thought in his head that was driving him to the brink of his morals and sanity.
You always thought about Sunghoon and he believed Sunghoon didn’t think of you the way you thought of him.
It may be cruel for him to even think this but Sunghoon didn’t deserve your unconditional care and love, he was sure of it, especially not after what he was doing, why he even approached you in the first place.
You didn’t deserve it but it’ll hurt you to find out but it would only destroy you completely if he allows Sunghoon to continue on with this. To use you for his own benefit.
“He’s using you” 
You blinked rapidly trying to understand what Jay had suddenly said, “What?” You awkwardly chuckled 
“You’re too good for him” He heavily sighed, “You don’t deserve this. Any of this” 
“What are you talking about Jay..?” 
Honestly, you didn’t want to know. Your mind tells you to walk away without waiting for a response and wait in the comforts of your bubble for Sunghoon to come to you.
“I’m so sorry” Jay rubbed his forehead, clear angst forming on his face as the conflict in his head grew more 
His eyes looked up from the floor to your eyes and that is where you see the pitiful look in them. Your hands unconsciously balled into a fist, for some reason you’re always seemed on the receiving end of it.
You hated being pitied. “What are you apologizing for?” 
“Sunghoon” The single name that could make your entire word stop left Jay’s mouth, “He never needed any tutoring. He’s been a straight A student his entire life and he didn’t experience some type of burnout”
“He just said that to make you feel bad for him to have you tutor him” 
You shook your head. You came early morning to late at night just to help him study, to retain the material he was supposed to be struggling with, “With all due respect Jay, you weren’t here”
“You didn’t see him… Any of it. He was struggling, he really was” Clinging to the very hope you had left for Sunghoon you defended him even against his own brother because it’s always been you and Sunghoon
Even though you weren’t together, he must’ve felt something, anything, when you and him were together. 
Jay hoped you trusted his words over the ones that Sunghoon planted into your head but it was a losing game. “He’s a good liar”
“Why?!” You suddenly shouted, your tears rolled down your cheek, you frustratedly wiped them away, there was no reason to cry. “Tell me, why would he lie about it?” 
Jay took a moment, he wanted to console you. You shouldn’t waste tears on his brother who wasn’t worthy of them. “To piss me off” His voice barely above a whisper, “Sunghoon and I tend to clash a lot and there just some times where one of us gets what the other wants so badly”
“Why use me to get back at you? I have no value to you” You scoffed loudly but through your confusion like a montage Sunghoon flashed through your mind
His vampire smile you grew to love, the way he’d hold your body and his fingers tracing over your back, his lips that felt like they were solely made for you melting against yours.
You knew Sunghoon but creeping in the back of your head, it was starting to feel like you didn’t know him in the slightest.
Because how could you, just his friend, know him better than his own twin brother? 
You didn’t know the effect your words had on Jay's heart. You held more value to him than words could even begin to express but he couldn’t express it.
He only remained silent, unable to say anything to rebuttal your previous statement without exposing the buried feelings he’s had on you for years. 
In the silence, you looked away from Jay to the ground. It’s far too much for you. Turning your heel towards the front door you left without another word and Jay didn’t try and stop you.
This was it. You’d realize just who Sunghoon is and you’d be gone from their lives forever. A piece of dreaded it but anything was better than you and Sunghoon together. 
As you left, Jay could only watch your back before it disappeared behind the closed door. 
Your lips quivered. You didn’t know why you were crying, there was no truth to Jay’s words but deep down there was always suspicion. It was too good to be true even though you weren’t officially together.
Sunghoon was like your knight in shining armor, a haven you never seemed to be able to escape from even if you tried to leave and he didn’t mind having you there even when you weren’t his. 
He treated you like you held the utmost importance in the world but he never once said he liked you, you just assumed he did even when you never heard those words. You were the idiot that chose to believe your delusions. Actually believing Sunghoon liked you. 
What trick your mind played on you to ever think that.
ꨄ︎
Sunghoon has been staring at his phone for far too long. It’s been 5 days, almost 6 days in the next 26 minutes, 43 seconds, since you’ve last talked and this was the longest time he’s gone without seeing, texting or hearing you. 
Roughly grabbing his phone and keys, he rushed out of his room, down the stairs and out the door. He’s tired of telling himself that he’s worrying over nothing, he was going to see you. 
Around 30 minutes later, when the sound of the doorbell rang echoed throughout the house, Jay peeked his head at it before opening the door.
His resting face contorted seeing you fiddling with your fingers and at the sound of the door opening you raised your head showing your puffy red rimmed eyes just.
You cursed under your breath seeing Jay, there was a 50/50 percent chance that either of them would open the door. You just wished it were Sungoon instead of Jay though. 
Reverting your eyes somewhere else, you softly cleared your throat, wiping the imaginary tear stains off your face. You haven’t spoken since you suddenly left the house almost a week ago and you didn’t feel like talking. 
“What… What are you doing here?” Jay broke the silence taking in your disheveled state, something he used to see back then whenever you were in a down mood during school
“Is Sunghoon here?” You managed to ask
There was a quietness that was suffocating, the question hung heavy in the atmosphere, “Why are you doing this?” You looked at him after hearing his question only to see his outraged expression, “Why are you looking for him?”
You rubbed your forehead hastily, “Just tell me is he here or not?” You were exhausted and you wanted nothing more but to crash in the only comfort you knew of
You knew it was stupid but you’ll deal with Sunghoon– with everything after properly resting but for now you just wanted him to hold you the way that made you believe the unsaid things feel real. 
Jay scoffed, gaining your attention, he shook his head as he looked at you with amusement, Sunghoon had already casted his spell all over you, “Are you kidding me?”
Your arms wrapped around you in an attempt to console yourself. You looked away from Jay, unable to face him. Suddenly Jay grabbed your shoulders making the safety hold you had for yourself break apart as you stared at him with a widened expression. 
“Snap out of it” Jay realized it’s already too late, “Do you hear yourself?” 
“Why are you crawling back to him?” You roughly pushed his arm off your shoulders letting out a frustrated huff
“It doesn’t concern you Jay!” You angrily said
“Don’t you realize he’s already messed with your head? He has already hypnotized you!” He didn’t realize the build up that would soon lead to his own demise, “Why can’t you see that he is no good for you?!”
This time you scoffed loudly, “And you would know what’s good for me?” You raised an eyebrow, “Give me a break Jay” You laughed shaking your head
“At least I have a better idea than the two of you” Jay said, “He doesn’t care for you” His words were harsh, mean but it was the only way he could think would be able to get his message through 
“You deserve more, someone far better than him” There was more to Sunghoon and it was right in front of you, “I-I… I’d never do what he did to you” His voice going quieter with each word 
He wasn't sure what he was hoping to achieve but he hoped he was able to do something at least. 
“I’d cherish you the way you deserve to be” He chuckled out a faint smile before dropping it, everything was pathetic, he was pathetic. “If you were just with me from the start… You never would question anything” He said more to himself but you managed to pick up on it
You didn’t understand a single thing Jay was spewing but his words seeped through the small cracks that were bare and exposed waiting to be filled with what you longed for. 
“You’re too good for this world, far too good to be dealing with him–Any of this” Jay heaved before running a hand through his hair forcing it away from the frame of his face making you able to see it fully for the first time, “I can’t bear to have Sunghoon ruin you- Just because he could” His voice cracked with every word
Freezing hearing the break of his voice, you hesitantly pushed aside your own heightened emotions to look at Jay’s distraught state. There was more to meet the eye when it came to Jay and this was it. Built emotions finally crumbling down.
You hesitantly pulled Jay’s hand away from his hair which he easily let you but kept his eyes to the ground unable to look at you. 
“Jay” The softly calling of his name leaving from your lips made his body burn and mind hazy, he shut his eyes trying to shut away the thoughts in his mind, “Jay” The second call of his name broke him
He let out a pained noise crashing straight into your arms. You stopped, your eyes went wide at the sudden closeness but nevertheless you wrapped your arms around holding him close to you.
He shuddered, feeling the piercing touch of your touch of his body but he eased shortly afterwards. Jay clung onto your body as if he were to let go, you would disappear to his brother once again. You didn’t say anything as you held him, rubbing your hand over his back to ease him. 
You didn’t know why you felt the need to take care of him like this. It must’ve been because he was related to Sunghoon or maybe even because he reminded you of yourself. Seeing the same breakdown in him that was in you before you met Sunghoon.
He carefully pulled away from the crevice of your neck, your arms fell onto his shoulders while his hands rested on your hips.
His eyes threaded up to you, he gulped harshly feeling how the line between rationality and irrationality were blending together where he didn’t know where one began and the other ended. 
There were more said when neither of you were speaking than when the two of you spoke and that scared you.
You looked deep into Jay’s eyes and you could see how he held his entire world in there and you were dead center of it. Your mouth moved to say something, anything would suffice in this moment.
Jay’s eyes shifted from your eyes to your agape mouth and found himself looking longer than he intended to. When he looked to your eyes again, he noticed your eye trailing between his lips and eyes and like a familiar trance he found himself leaning straight in to capture your lips with his. 
With the single taste of you after longing for it for so long felt like a drink of cold water on a hot summer night. It was like a wave chilled his burning body as he was brought into the deep end already too far gone to comprehend anything. 
There was a sickening sensation in his stomach but it was overcomed with desperation for you. 
Your mouth moved with his and the hands on your waist brought you closer, meshing your body with his. Your loosened arms wrapped around his neck for support as you felt your body resting up against his.
He smiled in the kiss before carefully guiding you into the house, taking off your shoes, kicking them, discarding them somewhere near the door.
As you were led into the house you were too familiar with, there was a sensation of unsettlement. However, it was swept away in the daze you seemed to be under as you continued to kiss Jay who kissed you like a starved man having his first supper. 
Guiding you up the stairs, his lips still connected to each other as you felt him softly tug at the bottom of your lip, asking, pleading to let him in.
When you gave the slightest opening, he slipped in and explored your mouth as if he had been searching decades for it. Your hands went to the play with his hair, your feet walking backwards from his guidance. 
Yet, when you opened your eyes feeling the thug of your bottom lip through his teeth was it then did you catch sight of the familiar painting hanging in the center of the wall in the hallway.
Your eyes landed onto Sunghoon this time. It was the sudden reminder that you needed to wake up from the daze to realize what you were doing, where you were going and who was guiding you down this path. 
But Sunghoon can’t judge you. He doesn’t have the right to. He didn’t like you. You were just convenient to him whenever he needed you to be. He doesn’t care about you. He doesn’t care. He was just using you.
You screwed your eyes shut. Out of sight, out of mind.
Your hands harshly tugging at Jay’s hair as you continued to let Jay guide you to his room, walking straight past Sunghoon’s. 
The moment of entering Jay’s room was there was a switch flipped, the desperate kiss became toned down to a more sensual one, memorizing how you felt molded with his. Contrasting how Sunghoon usually is with you. 
Your legs bumped against his bed as he carefully placed you onto his bed, slotting himself in between your legs before folding them to bring you dead center of his bed as he hovered over you, never letting his lips off of yours. 
Jay’s prayers were finally answered, for the first time in his life, he was finally listened to. You softly moaned in the kiss feeling his hands running up your sides in a loving manner that easily fooled you and pulled you deeper.
Feeling the smile you pulled away only for Jay to chase after you. He wanted,needed more. He didn’t want it to end. You weren’t able to get out a single syllable as he attached his lips back onto yours.
“Why are you smiling?” You managed to say through the swollen of your lips as he continued to kiss you even past your question
“Because I’m happy” He murmured a response because it was the truth, for the first time in a long time, Jay was finally happy
He was launching himself head first into your world and that’s the highest peak of happiness he could ever achieve.
You felt the jumble of emotions rolling around you and the shivers made Jay finally pull away to look at you like you hung each and every single star in the universe. There was a loopy smile plastered on his face that made your eyes remain on him.
He stroked your face with the same fond smile, “We can take it slow” He spoke, his tone nothing louder than a whisper
You didn’t know Jay, not in the way you knew your friends, not how you knew Sunghoon but you felt a sense of security, desire and love that you hadn’t felt before from him. This was different, something new but you weren’t sure if it was real. 
But Jay was adamant on making it known you belonged right in the center of his life, with him. 
“Only if you say yes” His eyes looked deep into yours, “I’ll show you true ecstasy… One that comes from nothing but love and care” 
Your eyes searched over Jay trying so hard to find any deception but your mind leaned towards what is being offered to you, how you can be satisfied with what you’re ‘deprived’ of. 
Love.
You found it hysterical. What is love? Is it what you feel whenever you’re with Sunghoon or was it something Jay could show you? 
You weren’t sure what it was, never knowing how it felt or ever truly experiencing it, “Jay” You softly pleated clawing at his back, tears trickled in your eyes hoping that was more than enough to convey what you wanted, what you needed from him
The pure desperation written all over your face made him smile before softly chuckling. He only ever dreamed of having you, “You make me crazy over you baby” You didn’t register the nickname that rolled off his tongue so easily as his mouth captured yours in a desperate kiss
“But I need you to tell me” He murmured making your whine, the more he deprived you the more desperate you grew
“Yes! Anything- Just anything” You breathlessly spoke but your eyes never opened as you pleaded
You squealed when his hands were roaming towards the hem of your shirt only to stop. Feeling his shaky hands and hesitation, you weakly nodded your head grabbing his hand with yours to feel his cold touch against your bare stomach.
“Let me do all the work baby” He pecked a few kisses on your cheek and jaw as his hands rose higher making the goosebumps rise onto your skin
Taking in his words, you completely let your body become loose letting him take over. His head slotted next to yours as his hand reached your breast only to realize you weren’t wearing a bra.
He smirked, having his finger rub over your hardening bud, “Oh?” He whispered in your ear making you turn your head from embarrassment
His dark chuckle rumbled something in you pushing past your embarrassment as he engulfed your breast in his hand, fondling with it before his other hand bundled the rest of your shirt upwards before taking it completely off you to throw it somewhere in his room. 
You tried to cover your now exposed body but he stopped you before you could. His eyes never looked away from yours, he gave you a cheek kiss then brought his lips from your shoulder kissing the entirety of your collarbone until getting to the center only to lick in between the crevice of both of your breasts. 
Jay grumbled a satisfied rumble that tickled your skin but unable to let out a giggle you only raked your hands to his hair, your legs trying to muddle together to ignore the growing need in between your legs but there was something stopping you and it was in the shape of Jay.
He laughed noticing you growing more needy the more he took his time with you, “Plea-please” You whined making him freeze, this desperate plea shot straight to the restraint in his pants 
Popping one of your breasts into his mouth, his tongue gliding over your nipple making your body jolt at the sensation, throwing your head back into his pillows as your senses became filled with Jay. 
His free hand grasped the other breasts making sure you weren’t deprived in the slightest by him. He left your breasts covered in his saliva with the way he was messily eating it, his tongue dragged in between your breasts, unsure which side was his favorite, only to deem that both were.
Everything about you did he love. 
The clinging of your underwear became worse. With a popping sound of his mouth detaching from your breasts before trailing below your breast, leaving open mouthed kisses each stop as he lowered to your stomach until he reached the waistband of your pants. 
He looked up at you with his blown out pupils, asking for permission to let him ravish you, to let him in. Your mouth was dry, no matter how hard you tried to swallow you couldn’t, only feeling the dry scratches against your throat. You could only nod your head enough to have him looping his fingers under your belt loop before tugging them painfully to slow down. 
Your hands crumbled at his sheets under your grab as you and Jay never looked away from each other.
He pulled your pants down to your ankle before fully taking them off, only leaving you in your panties, seeing the way your legs squished together to hide yourself but he carefully put his hand on your knee, prying your legs wide open for him. The wet splotch center of your panties outlined your leaking entrance just for him. 
He felt his heart stop, his eyes zeroing on your clothed cunt and you noticed his gaze had you trying to close your legs again but he kept them opened.
He brought his head closer to your pussy making you attempt to keep him away feeling the beating of your heart in your ear the closer he got but his arms looped under your legs to keep you in place. 
A soft whimper fell from you falling deaf on his ears as he placed a long kiss on your knee before going further, deeper to your inviting self until he reached your inner thigh. Just a few centimeters away from him was paradise.
He planted a kiss on your clothed core making you jump at the contact, letting out a desperate moan in the process rocking your hips forward to his mouth wanting more.
Jay hooked his fingers around the side of your panties bringing them down, making sure to leave kisses on the bare skin being presented and with each kiss, the more he felt the hazy feeling in his mind getting worse. 
When you were completely bare, he had to take a moment to appreciate you. His eyes looked all over your exposed body for him and he burned this image forever in the depths of his brain to never forget it, not that he thought he ever could.
“You’re gorgeous” He softly muttered, his hands tracing over your bare skin trailing down to your aching core and when his long glided over your swollen bud you let out a sweet moan 
Jay could listen to you forever. Without thinking twice, he quickly brought his head to your soaping pussy, his mouth already salivating at the thought before latching onto making your mouth fall slack as you melted into his bed. 
His mouth opened wide, his tongue slurping everything to taste your arousal all over his taste buds allowing himself to get lost in it. You’re the best thing to ever happen to him.
His satisfied hummed shot directly into your core making it send a wave of pleasure into you. Your quiet moans became louder when his tongue protruded your gaping hole teasing it before dragging his tongue on your folds all the way up to your clit to suck on the bundle of nerves. 
“Wa-Please” You blabbed your head felt like it would fall off any second the more you entered in the trance making you forget everything that existed outside of Jay’s room, only focusing on him
Hearing you fueled Jay with a need to make you fall apart for him, to forget Sunghoon that already left his mark on you wanting to replace it with his own.
Jay lapped at your pussy like you were the best dessert to ever be offered to him, he didn't come up for air, he was so engrossed in your sweet cunt that he found oxygen overrated, who needed it when you were all he ever needed.
Your eyes clamp shut, the thin layer of sweat covering your body as you hold yourself back from your building orgasm, “Don’t hold back… I got you”
“Let go for me baby, I’ll take care of you” Jay slurred as best as he could continuing to take in everything that spilled out of you
Jay will take care of you. He’ll pick up in whatever Sunghoon lacked to give you.
Your hands found their way to his hair, tugging at them only to soothe his head as your whiny moans and the wet sounds of his mouth lapping at your core filled the room.
The sounds of his mouth leaving your wetness before going back in repeated like a broken record.
“Please… ‘m gon-gonna cum” Your words barely tied together as you snapped, your chest heaving as you let out a loud moan as you came all over Jay’s tongue without warning
“Sorry. Sorry” You emptily apologized for the mess you made but Jay didn’t care, why would he 
He helped ride out your high, never stopping his laps at your pussy. It wasn’t until he finally detached himself from you and did your arms landing onto your sides that he finally got a proper breath of air.
His chest rose and dropped with each pant but to see your your fucked out expression made it all worth it. 
Your eyes remained close, your body jolting from his teasing fingers at your entrance that he thought would better help ease your sensitive body.
You weakly shook your head in an attempt to save yourself from the overstimulation. He chuckled, giving one last kiss to your clit making you open your eyes to see him. 
You looked all over his eyes, the side loopy smile and the bottom half of his face glistening from your release made you cringe seeing it.
“You taste amazing baby” He praised but you didn’t expect him to easily remove his shirt, wiping away the smeared arousal on his face before throwing it somewhere to catch your lips with his
He happily groaned in the kiss. His body pressed against yours and there you felt it. The covered bulge grinding against you the more he moved, making you moan in the kiss catching his attention. 
Jay pulled away from the kiss to cup your face stroking your cheek softly with his thumb as he looked at you, the same loving gaze from the very start.
Your insides twisted and this time you were the one that grabbed the back of his neck to bring his lips back onto yours. 
With the little space you allowed him to be away from you he fiddled with his pants in one swift motion and with the spring, you felt the wet slap against your body from his hardened cock.
You pulled away from the kiss to gulp not daring to look down, simply wrapped your arms around his neck in an attempt to bring his body closer feeling the poke of his cock. 
His fingers found their way to your leaking entrance once again to gather as much of your arousal that he could before lathering it over his hard on. Smearing his precum with your arousal almost made him come right then and there but he knew it would be better inside.
“I know, baby. I know” He whispered in the shell of your ear
Jay knew something but you weren’t sure if you knew.
He hovered your body and the last thing he saw was your doe eyes looking up to him making his heart beat faster than ever.
It finally registered that this was reality, this was his reality. He no longer had to dream wondering what his life would’ve been if he had you from the start because now he did have you. 
Aligning his tip with your entrance, he let out a shaky breath “Take a deep breath for me baby” Your uneven breathing made it impossible for you to take a proper breath but when he carefully inserted himself the air got caught in your throat making a gurgling sound erupt from you
Your hands flung to his shoulders for support as he groaned, feeling the closed confinement of your wall wrapped around him. The deep breath had done nothing in preparing you to take in the daring stretching ripping you open on his thick girth.
Too big. Too wide. Too full.
Your fingers dug into his shoulder blades as he continued to slip in, tears filled your eyes as they trickled down the side. Your senses were too filled and far gone to comprehend anymore. 
Jay rested his arms over your shoulder to leverage just enough to lay his head next to yours. He kisses your salty tears away, his hand tilted your head to the side enough for his mouth to slot with yours, to distract you. 
You whimpered in the kiss as he stilled his size, feeling the contraction of your hole around him, engulfing him perfectly and he didn’t expect anything less from you.
He lowly groaned as he held your head in place as the kiss became needier, your noises muffled by his mouth while the tears fell onto his face from your eyes, “ ‘m sorry baby, so fucking sorry”
“Promise to make you feel good”
“You’re taking me so well, you’re absolutely perfect” He whispered praised into your ears as he strokes your head
The same perfect whisper in your ear by someone else. You clawed at his shoulder blades sure that you would leave indents by how you gripped him. You kept your eyes shut with the excuse in mind that you wanted the tears to stop from spilling. 
“You-You can m-move”
Jay looked at your face, your eyes closed with tear stained cheeks, your eyebrows knitting and the hold on his shoulders.
His first thrust was slow and shallow. Your loud gasp filled his ears as your fingers dug even deeper into his shoulders. He hissed quietly feeling how you took everything he gave you, “Perfect” He murmured dragging out his cock before plunging it back in
Each time he left, you sucked him right back in. Your arms wrapped around his back, feeling his muscles moving with his movements. You wrapped your legs around his waist to hold him, to have him take you away. 
The feel of your breasts squished in between along the drag of him sliding in and out of you made your head hazy, your held back moans shot into his ear.
Jay slipped his arms over your body to engulf your body like how you were doing to him. 
The meet of his hip each time releasing a splash of wetness to drip down messily filled the room the more Jay snapped his hip deeper into you. “Beautiful baby”
“The absolute best, was meant to be just for you”
“Meant to be for me” He blabbed right into your ear with each thrust following after every word
You clawed harshly at his back hearing his words, your whines becoming louder. Meant to be for who? For Jay?
“Right baby? You were meant to be mine” His sharp thrust made your body jolt after each one, “Perfect..- Fucking perfect” Any sense of control Jay had went out the window, any morals he had to reconcile with Sunghoon flushed down the drain 
But fuck. It felt so good. Too good. You were too good to him just for him to let you go back and get ruined by Sunghoon. 
Your only attention was on Jay who was providing such pleasure to you, the way your hands clawed at his skin knowing it would leave scratch marks made you feel sorry but with every grunt he let out each time you dragged his fingers across his back, you don’t think he cared. 
His hips continued to snap against you and the full pull of his cock before shoving it back into you made you too far gone to think.
When he managed to peel his body off yours just for a moment, he looked down to where you were connected. Seeing how he slipped in and out, he needed to see all of you. 
Moving enough to grab your hips as he thrusted deeper at the new position deeply into you. You threw your head back burying yourself in his pillows, turning to the side as you let out your muffled moans against them. Jay watched how your breast jumped from his harsh thrust.
His chest filled with pride but in a glimmer he caught the dainty necklace resting on your collarbone. 
It never moved from your collarbone and he felt sick. He was the one above you and yet, the necklace still laid on your bare skin like it was meant to be there.
 Sunghoon still managed to ruin this for him. He always manages to destroy everything. Jay grunted loudly, grasping the necklace and craning your neck up from his pillow.
Your eyes shot open to see him holding your necklace and like a cold bucket of water thrown, you froze. No. No. No.
Jay’s thrust became animalistic, filled with nothing but rage, jealousy, and most of all hatred. The love and care now long gone.
Your mouth fell wide open with nothing but louder moans leaving it as the sound of his hips harshly meeting yours. The familiar build up rose in your stomach and you shook your head, too much was happening and you couldn’t focus.
You tried to get him to let go of your necklace as the creeping orgasm was nearing. You couldn’t relax knowing you were about to break. But to your shock Jay’s thrust came to a sudden stop ripping your orgasm away.
Unknowingly letting out whine in your pants, you gulped harshly trying to properly breath as your eyes fluttered, the sticky feeling of your sweat covering your body as your hand tightly held Jay’s arm holding your neck up by your necklace.
Jay looked down seeing your pleading eyes looking at him, your hands weakly tightening to make him let go. 
He turned your necklace around until he found the clasp and without a second thought, he unclasped it, peeling it off your sweaty body.
There were very few times you felt your heart drop to the pit of your stomach but this had to be at the top of the list. Jay on top of you, buried deep inside of you, dangling the necklace, looking at the material like some medal.
Sunghoon really outdid himself.
He scoffed loudly, wrapping the necklace around his wrist to mimic a bracelet, he isn’t one to wear bracelets, always preferring watches but he will proudly wear it for you.
“Don’t worry baby, I‘ll buy you a new one. A much prettier one” Jay stroked the side of your face with the back of his finger to soothe you your frantic self
You stared at him in terror. You didn’t want a prettier, nicer or better necklace. 
You wanted your necklace.
He caught your lips in a haste, the kiss now filled with desperation. You’re not Sunghoon’s anymore, as if you ever were. 
In the kiss, he moved his hips picking up right where he left off with the same harsh and deep thrust that jolted your body up to burn from the fire of Jay. 
You whimper in the kiss, feeling again how deep Jay was inside of you. His hands stayed at your sides and you shivered feeling the unease flip of your stomach feeling the cold metal on his wrist against your hot body. 
When he pulled away, your hands clamped onto him for support. Your moans and wetness bounced off his walls as he continued to ram deeper into you, having his tip kiss your cervix with each thrust making you see stars.
He planted messy kisses all over your face, “My pretty baby” 
“J-Jay” 
Hearing how breathless you sounded, how you held onto him, feeling you tightening around him as if to keep him buried inside of you until the end of time, not wanting to let him go. He’d go through anything if it meant to have you like this forever. 
“Fuck baby, keep tightening around me like that” He grunted feeling you sucking him whenever he dared to pull away more than halfway, “Take me… All of me. It’s all for you”
“ ‘m close. I’m close- Plea-Please… Jay!” You moaned louder as you felt the tip of your orgasm reaching, Jay’s hips continued to slam into you
Your head was full of Jay and the orgasm that he was about to rip out of you, forgetting all about the necklace against your hips wrapped around Jay’s wrist.
“Come with me baby-”
The sounds of your pussy slouching with his cock made an obscene noise that sounded like a perfect melody to Jay. His thrust became sloppy, he was slipping further out only having to guide himself back deep into you.
You let out a lewd moan, filled with rasp and wetness as you came all over his cock, covering all around it of your release. 
“Gonna make me- Fuck baby”
“Take all of it- I give all of me to you”
Jay held you close and firm while your arms loosely wrapped around him scratching his back as your velvet walls were now painted white because of him. 
Resting his forehead against yours, your chests heaving together soon finding the same rhythm falling and rising together.
Your eyes fluttered open to see the look of pure tenderness, warmth, love. 
You shiver seeing the look in his eyes, you felt something achingly burn in you. You weren’t sure if it was the sudden emptiness of Jay slipping himself out of your sensitive core or if it was the familiar look that made your skin crawl. 
Noticing your worry filled eyes he captured your lips with his in a slow kiss. He wanted to get rid of that look in your eyes, he wanted to make you melt for him
His hands run up and down your side as your hands tingle to move as they land at the bottom of his nape playing with the hair at your fingers as your lips move together. 
“My baby” He murmured in the kiss as he let his body rest against you. His roaming hands found your back to rub it as he pulled your body to him.
This was what he had always wished for. To finally have you. 
“Rest baby” Jay pulled away just enough to whisper for you to hear 
Rest.
Yet, the locked doorknob rattled furiously followed by harsh bangs against the wood door with the beyond angry voice of Sunghoon just on the other side knowing that you were in Jay’s room, in his fucking bed. 
 “Park Jongseong open the fucking door”
——
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raven-dor · 4 months ago
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me and my husband
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In which gwayne hightower is overprotective of his pregnant wife, and she begins to worry about the outcome of the birth
PAIRING: gwayne hightower x reader
WARNINGS: angst, anxiety, rough pregnancy, mentions of blood, arguing, fluff ending
WORD COUNT: 3.2k
AN: I read "chose me" by @entitled-fangirl and had to write something similar for gwayne!! this could also be read as part of the come back to me universe, but you do not have to read any other fic to understand the context!!
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She watched from the dark hall, her heart fluttering as he leaned back, exposing his neck and upper chest. Pregnancy awoke a dangerous animal inside her, one that needed her husband near her at all times. 
Instead, he sat in his office. 
She could not blame him; it was hard work, taking care of Old Town in place of his uncle’s absence. Seeing as his cousin had died recently, Gwayne would stand to inherit the Hightower title, and he all but jumped at the chance to begin his training.
But as of late, it seemed as if she needed him more than he needed her. Mere thoughts seemed to drown out her happiness, every attempt to block them futile. The larger she grew, the closer she got to the inevitable. She cleared her throat, making herself known to her husband. 
“Gwayne?” He looked up, smiling brightly. 
“My love! You should be in bed.” He stood up, ushering her over to a cushion. She glared, letting him coddle her for now.
“I am not inept.” 
“I know, darling.” He knelt in front of her, kissing her hand gently. “But you also know that I cannot help but worry for you.” He caressed her stomach, whispering. “And how is our little one?” 
“You have no need to worry, I assure you. The Maesters say the babe is perfectly healthy; there is no cause for concern.”
“And you?” He kissed her hand once more. “How do you fare?”
She was taken aback by that question, avoiding the question. “Do not worry about me.” 
“That is my job as your husband.” He walked back to his desk, putting out the flickering candle. “And Maesters are not always correct.” 
“That is a rather skeptical view.” She grabbed the handles of the chair, pushing herself up. Gwayne glared. 
“Please ask for my aid next time you plan on standing.” 
“Shall I ask you to help me relieve myself as well?” She glared back. “I love you; you know that I do. But I am not a frail piece of straw. I will not break from a gust of wind.”
“You are carrying the future heir to the Hightower name, my dear.” 
Terms like that make her uneasy. That is all she heard all day. ‘Future heir,’ ‘Hightower name,’ ‘a boy.’ All phrases she had heard over a hundred times. She just wanted a moment of peace where she was not reminded how little she mattered in this situation. A tight smile graced her lips, and she lost all humor in her tone. “As I am constantly reminded.” 
He grabbed her hand, walking slowly out of the office. “All I ask is that you take care. If not for me, then for the sake of our child.” 
“I am careful.” She glared. “You know this. It’s not as if I go looking for things to hurt the babe. Do not treat me like a child to be watched over.” 
He rubbed a thumb over the back of her hand. “I do not mean to upset you-” 
“Well, you have.” She scoffed. “You have somehow managed to insult my care for your future line and my child in one blow. It is astonishing, truly. I applaud you.” 
“You know that was not my intention.” He shut their bedroom door, removing his shirt. Y/N tried to keep herself from blushing at the sight, but when he looked like that, it was hard to do. He knelt in front of her, holding both of her hands in his. “I am sorry.” 
She hummed, walking away and sitting in front of her vanity. “Yes, well, I suppose I forgive you.” 
He grinned. “I am glad of it.” 
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The woods were peaceful, a nice retreat from the bustling of Old Town. Her velvet green dress dragging behind her. She hummed, closing her eyes and listening to the sound of the trees swaying. There was a lake nearby that she desperately wanted to swim in, and stare up into the sky of blue. Pushing the tall grass out of her way, the clearing stretched out before her, the lake at the center. She grinned, running down the hill with a newfound joy.
“Y/N? Where are you?” 
Her smile fell, remembering the whole reason she had even been ‘allowed’ to go on this excursion. He’d only let her go if he came along. She sighed, turning around and walking back up the hill. “Coming, my love.” 
The auburn-haired man smiled, wrapping his arms around her waist. “Where did you run off to?” 
“The clearing.” She traced shapes on his chest. “I was thinking, perhaps you could join me for a swim. It is a perfect day for it.” 
“I-” 
“My lord.” Their guard’s voice echoed through the forest. Y/N groaned, falling against her husband’s chest. Gwayne kissed the top of her head, smiling sympathetically. “Another time, I swear to you.” She sighed, nodding. A finger hooked under her chin, his eyes serious. “You look far too melancholy, my love.” 
“Well, perhaps if-” 
“My lord, I’m sorry, but it is most urgent.” 
Gwayne sighed, intertwining his hand with hers. “What is it?”
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The Maester’s Wing was dim, with just a few candles keeping light. Gwayne had been summoned to settle a squabble between the townfolk, leaving Y/N to visit the old man herself. She tapped her foot, waiting for the Maester to ask her the questions she dreaded. But those questions never came. 
“My lady.” 
Y/N smiled, nodding. “Maester Jon, it is wonderful to see you.” She held her stomach. “Tell me, any developments my husband or I should be aware of?” 
“Unfortunately, yes, my lady.” He sat down. “It seems, from what we can tell so far, that the birth may result in a breach pregnancy.” Y/N’s blood ran cold, and she felt her breath catch. “A breach pregnancy may result in a choice needing to be made.” He leaned forward, a sympathetic look on his face. “Do you understand what this means, my lady?” 
She nodded, standing up quickly. “I do. Thank you, Maester Jon. I shall relay the news to my lord husband.”
She gave one last look at the dark corner before practically running out of the wing. She burst through the hall doors, dinner in full swing. There sat Gwayne, eyes drooping, visibly exhausted from his duties. 
Who was she to worry him anymore?
Y/N sat beside her husband, kissing his cheek. “How was your day, my love?” 
“Infinitely better, now that you are here.” He smiled. “How was the visit?” 
She took a large sip of her wine. “Well. All is well.” She grabbed his hand, squeezing it tightly. “I love you.” 
He grinned, squeezing back. “I love you much more, my dear.” 
If he chose the babe, she knew she would surely die from heartbreak before she bled. She laughed, her eyes watering. “I do not think that is possible.” 
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Since learning of the news, she’d been restless, barely sleeping and often waking before the sun. Its bright rays peeked through the curtains, hitting her skin. The warmth soothed her for a moment, but it was just that, a moment. 
The babe kicked harshly, a quiet groan leaving her. She stared at the ceiling, thinking that in just a few short weeks, she’d be giving birth in this very bed, staring at the same ceiling. 
It had always been described to her as horrible and painful beyond recognition. And now that she was carrying an heir, which could possibly be breach, she almost wished she could go back to when they first met and stop herself. When she didn’t have to worry about what she did or where she went, she could just be free. 
He would be pressured into choosing the child over her; she knew this. Sometimes, when the need for an heir was strong, women had been carelessly cut open, being left for dead. It had been done many times, most notably in her lifetime, by King Viserys. Rhaenyra had told her of his actions: how he’d carelessly cut Aemma open, and her mother bled out on the bed without ever getting to hold her babe. 
She looked over at her husband, fast asleep and dead to the world. His hair covered his eyes; his face was shoved into the pillow haphazardly. She giggled; he’d always slept like there was no tomorrow; it was heartwarming, to say the least. She leaned over, pushing the hair out of his face, kissing his forehead gently. 
 Rolling to her side, she quietly stood, careful not to wake him. Grabbing her robe from the wardrobe, she made her way to the dining hall, eager to eat something of actual sustenance. 
After learning of the news, she had picked at her dinner, telling Gwayne it was because the babe made her nauseous. 
In a way, it had. 
The smell of bacon and eggs flooded her senses, and she rounded the corner, the doors of the hall wide open. Greeting the occasional servant that passed by, she sat down, piling food onto her plate. 
“My lord.” Y/N looked up to see her husband stalking toward her, not even acknowledging the man who had greeted him. Odd, he normally slept as long as he could before starting his day. She smiled brightly. “Good morning, my love.” 
He raised his eyebrows. “Is it a good morning?” 
“Quite.” She tilted her head. “Why? Is something amiss?” 
He nodded, crossing his arms. “I awoke, and my wife was gone. Imagine my surprise.” 
She had felt horrible leaving him, and fighting would only give him more cause to choose the babe. “I am sorry if I scared you.” 
“You should be. And another-” He stopped, shock adorning his features. “You are sorry?” 
“I should have woken you. It was my mistake.” She pat the chair next to her. “Please, join me.” 
“I’m afraid I cannot. I have to meet with the steward this morning.” 
Her heart clenched. “I can join you if you’d like-” 
“It is not necessary. I will only bore you.” 
She murmured, reaching out to grab his hand. “You have never bored me.” 
“You are kind, but I’m sorry, I cannot be distracted.” He grabbed a plate, placing a biscuit and two pieces of bacon haphazardly.
She scoffed, glaring at her lord husband. “I did not realize I was such a distraction."
"Y/N...."
"Perhaps I should stay in my chambers for the remainder of my pregnancy. To keep you from further distraction.”
“That is not what I meant, and you know it.” 
She stood, her eyes cold. “I know nothing of the sort.” She looked over his shoulder, beckoning over a servant. “Please move my things into the adjoining room. I will be sleeping there-” 
Gwayne sat his plate down, looking at the servant. “Do not move her things.”  
“My lady?” The young girl looked frightened, scared that she was caught in the middle of their argument. 
Y/N sighed, dismissing the girl. “It is alright.” She walked away, yelling back at her husband. “I shall do it myself.” 
“Y/N!” Gwayne yelled, dropping his plate and running after her. “Come back here at once.” 
She ignored him, walking faster. The stairs proved to be a challenge, holding the railing tight. Gwayne placed a hand on her back. “Let me-” 
She flinched, pushing him back. “Don’t.” 
He mumbled. “You may hate me all you want after this.” 
“After what-” He hooked his arm under her legs, carrying her up the stairs. “Gwayne Hightower! You let me down right now!” 
The top of the stairs was a relief; she practically jumped out of his arms. She walked into their joint chambers, filling her trunk with things she would need. Gwayne sighed, watching from the doorway. “Will you please just-” 
“I will leave you to your devices, my lord. I hope your meetings prove well spent.” Dragging the trunk through the door, she slammed it in his face. 
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That had been three days ago. They’d seen each other in the halls and at meals, but other than that, Y/N steered clear of her husband. For the better part of the day, he’d been in a meeting with the patrons of Old Town, or so she’d heard. Y/N took that as an opportunity, rushing out of the castle’s gates. Squealing, she cut through the tall grass once more, racing down the hill towards the lake. She threw her dress off, her petticoat barely revealing her modesty. Not that anyone would see, this part of the wood was only known by the family. 
The water did wonders for her nerves, cooling her skin. Her hair stretched out past her waist, flowing like the tall grass that surrounded this oasis. She floated for what seemed like hours; the babe had not stirred once. She hummed, rubbing her bump gently. “It is quite peaceful here, is it not?” 
A kick. 
Y/N grinned, her eyes tearing up. “Please, try your best to make this an easy birth. It would break my heart not to meet you. If that is the case, don’t worry. Your father’s a good man; he’ll raise you well.” 
No kick. 
She laughed. “Do not ignore your mother. It’s quite disrespectful.” 
A kick. 
“I miss him too, my love.” 
A voice broke through the silence. “Miss who exactly?” 
Y/N jumped, standing in the water. “My lord, I did not expect you-” 
“I was in a meeting when a guard informed me you were running out of the castle gates.” His face looked conflicted, but she didn’t want to address the fact that he most likely heard that whole ‘conversation,’ so she remained silent. “Is there something you wish to tell me?” 
So he had heard. She smiled, trying to act as if nothing was wrong. “I do not know what you are referring to, my lord.” 
“Stop.” Gwayne sighed. “You haven’t called me that since before we were engaged, and I do not wish for you to start again.” He stepped forward, extending his hand. “Please come out of the lake.” 
She walked past his hand to her dress, every attempt to retrieve it proving futile. “Here.” Gwayne knelt down, picking it up off the stump. “What would you have done if I hadn’t been here?” 
“I would have figured it out, thank you very much.” She glared, pulling the frock over her head. “Do you not have another meeting to attend, my lord?” 
“I canceled them.” He laughed, stepping forward. “After I heard my wife was running away from our home, I thought it best to tend to the matter myself.” 
“How wise of you.” Y/N crossed her arms. 
“Shall we go to bed?” 
“I am not tired.” She walked up the hill, leaving him behind. “Have a restful night, my lord.” 
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She slammed her bedroom door shut, leaning against it. She was tired; she hated to admit it. But she wouldn’t have told him that. She walked over to the window, placing the bouquet she picked on the mantle. A reminder of the freedom she once had. A reminder of life before she faced death itself. 
A knock rang out. “May I come in?” 
She tensed. “If you must.” She faced the window, too scared to face him. If she looked at him, truly looked at him, she thought she would start crying. “To what do I owe the pleasure of your company?” 
“I have to ask you something, and I want you to answer me honestly.”
She nodded, walking away from the window and placing her robe in her wardrobe. “Ask it then.” 
“Do you still love me?”
Her heart stopped. “I-” 
Gwayne stepped forward, wrapping a singular arm around her waist. He drew her in, his scent engulfing her senses. She fought herself not to fall for his spell, but as he leaned his head down, and his breath hitting her neck, she knew she would not last. “If you do not, speak it plainly because I- I cannot go on like this any longer.” 
She turned around in his arms, placing her arms on his chest. “I do not believe I could ever stop loving you. Trust me when I say this.” She smiled. “I’m afraid it’s terminal.” 
“Ah.” He let out a sigh of relief. “Then what is it that troubles you so?” 
“I do not know what you-” 
“I beg you, do not finish that sentence.” He tilted her chin up, worry in his eyes. “What ales you, my love?” 
“I am simply nervous.” She to be out of his arms. The longer she stayed in his embrace, the more compelled she felt to tell him. “It is nothing, I swear to you.”
He raised his eyebrows, pulling her hands from his chest and kissing them gently. “Please do not lie to me.”
“That night I visited the Maester, he told me something.” He nodded. “He said with the way the pregnancy is progressing, it is possible that the babe will be born breach.” Her voice grew quieter the longer she spoke. 
“That’s not all, is it?” 
She pushed out of his hold, walking to the other side of the room. “I’m so sorry, Gwayne. Truly, I am. Please forgive me-” a sob wrecked her body. “But I want to live. Please.” 
Gwayne shook his head. Where was this coming from? “Whatever are you talking about?” 
“I know I have been acting radical as of late, and I apologize, I just thought-” She hiccuped. “I thought it would make your choice easier.” 
“What choice, darling?” 
She whispered. “Between me and the babe.” 
“Why would I-” It dawned on him. Had she really been dealing with this all by herself? “Oh, my sweet girl. Why did you not tell me?” 
“I didn’t want to stress you any further.” She hugged herself. “Please, Gwayne. I swear I will give you another heir if this pregnancy-” She shivered. “Just don’t cut me. I beg you.” 
He dropped down in front of her, grabbing her hands in his. “Listen to me well. I could sire a hundred children, but you. You are one of a kind, and I will always choose you.” He kissed the back of her hands once more. “Irreplaceable. You must know this.” 
“Gwayne, no one is truly irreplaceable.” 
He stood, his eyes dark. “Do not say such things again. Swear it to me.” 
“I-” 
“Swear it, Y/N.” 
“I swear.” She whispered, cheeks red. “I swear to you.” 
He nodded, smiling lightly. “I’m sorry.” 
“For what?” 
“For coddling you.” He stepped closer, caressing her bump. “I am scared as well. My own mother had many a difficult pregnancy, and I would never forgive myself if something happened to you.” 
“I am sorry as well.” She placed a hand on his cheek. “I should have come to you with my worries. I did not want to burden you. And I will make sure you have your heir. I promise you that.” 
“I do not care if the Hightower name crumbles away into nothingness. As long as you are content, I will be as well.” He leaned down, their foreheads touching. “There would be no point to this without you. I fear I could not do this if you were not by my side.” 
“You have been doing perfectly fine as of late.” She winced. "I truly am sorry.” 
“No more of that.” He whispered, staring at her lips. “May we please go to bed?” 
She nodded, knowing if she tried to speak that words would fail her. She lay on the bed beside him, tracing his freckles. “Sleep, my love.” He wrapped an arm around her waist. “I will be here when you wake, I promise.” 
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2K notes · View notes
cheralith · 1 year ago
Text
to a heart's content — 「 single father!miguel o'hara x reader 」
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content warnings ; fem!reader, use of she/her pronouns, "mother"/"daughter"/"wife" used, parental death, mentions of child abandonment, not too much mention of him being spider-man
contains ; single father!miguel o'hara, boss!miguel o'hara, assistant!reader, hints of pining, just some good ol' fluff for everyone's current favorite dilf, angst w/ comfort, heavy need of editing prob, not beta read
notes ; purely self-indulgent to fuel my love of found family trope apologies
parts: one two three four (tba)
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Single Father!Miguel O'Hara whose life revolves essentially around one person—his daughter—but to be one of the heads of America’s largest corporation and bearing the responsibility of keeping Nueva York safe and sound whilst simultaneously being a single father was not exactly something that Miguel O’Hara could juggle so easily. Hell, he’s even surprised that he’s made it so far without losing his absolute sanity considering he couldn’t even recall the last time he was able to rest properly without his attention being wavered to something or someone else.
Single Father!Miguel whose hands always filled to the brim with tasks and obligations. Miguel wished he was able to clone himself twice in order to have three Miguel O’Haras attending to each of his duties soundly, but alas, Alchemax and the matter of his mind can only do so much.
Single Father!Miguel whose ever so lucky to have you as his assistant to at least help with two out of three of them. You entered the picture around three years ago, when he had caught the eye of his superiors and had used his intelligence to their own advantage, disguising it as a promotion of sorts. You were given as some sort of gift to them as a way to help ease his workload and he truly couldn’t be more thankful for your existence—if he doesn’t necessarily show it most of the time from his stoic countenance he masks on 24/7. While not exactly a carbon copy of him, you, by far, come rather close, and Miguel will take whatever comes to him in this day and age.
Single Father!Miguel who notices that you're obedient and demure, though rather soft spoken and a little too apprehensive for his liking at times (he had noticed, before you became his assistant, that your coworkers would shovel their workload onto you and you’d accept with little complaint but evident hesitation; he wonders if it was the given similarities between you and him that made him choose you as his assistant). You dressed well, hung onto every word he said, and spoke out when properly needed. You were a good aid to have around—great, even.
Single Father!Miguel who trusts you as both his assistant and a human being enough to leave his precious daughter in your care knowing full well she would be in good hands. Sometimes Alchemax would work him overtime, sometimes his duties as Spider-Man would interfere. No matter what it was, it delayed him from seeing and attending to his daughter’s needs, and thus, he had asked you once in a while to pick up and babysit his daughter after your usual 9-5.
Single Father!Miguel who, at the beginning, once in a while asked you to pick his daughter up from school. Once in a while turned into occasionally. Occasionally turned into sometimes. Sometimes turned into constantly, and next thing Miguel knew, you were the one that his daughter and teachers would look out for during school pick up time. He didn’t expect that you would become his assistant even outside of work, but you did, and Miguel can’t exactly turn back time now. He’s labeled you as his child’s unofficial secondary caretaker—you’re even listed as an emergency contact.
Single Father!Miguel who thinks you’re too polite for your own good. Miguel had asked you once if this was a burden, being his assistant both in and out of Alchemax, and if it became too much that you were more than free to quit at any sudden time without consequence. You had merely replied that you understood the struggles of being a single parent and that he shouldn’t be ashamed of asking for help when it was needed. 
Single Father!Miguel who notices that Gabriella views you more than just her occasional babysitter. When he'd come home late at night, he was usually greeted by you two doing something together, whether it be doing math homework together, baking cookies, you reading aloud to her, or just simply talking, he'd always catch you and her almost... bonding.
Single Father!Miguel who often dwells on the memory of young Gabriella asking innocently why she doesn't have two parents like the rest of her classmates, why she only had one parent compared to everyone else after witnessing she was the odd one out during Family Day. Miguel didn't, and still doesn't, have the courage to tell her that her real mother had abandoned her to him, leaving Miguel in the dust. Miguel used her naivety to his advantage. He disguised it as her being unique compared to others, that some moms just came later in life; she just happened to be a late bloomer.
Single Father!Miguel who always thanks you for staying late tucking Gabriella into bed when he couldn't. You constantly tell him that it's truly no problem, but he insists on thanking you every time and ever so subtly increasing your paycheck. How could he not? Especially considering the fact you always, always whip him up extra dinner that was tucked away for him to eat during the late hours of night.
Single Father!Miguel who feels uneasy as he opens up a fridge to find the said pasta left by you one night in a glass tupperware container, staring at how neatly it’s been plated despite its standard container. He juts it into the microwave as he attempts to ignore how quiet and desolate the kitchen and the apartment is, how the humming of the microwave and the humdrum of the ceiling fan are the only noise that floats through. And when he quietly eats the pasta serving meant for one, he can’t help but gaze longingly at the empty seat across the dining table, where someone else should be seated with him sharing the same meal.
Single Father!Miguel who finally has the time to pick up his daughter after school for once in the school year, but forgot to tell you that you were able to take the rest of the day off. So you, him, Gabriella, and essentially everyone are surprised when both you and Miguel show up to pick Gabriella up after school. One of the teachers goes to gush about how she's excited to meet Gabriella's dad and what a beautiful family you all are, to which you and Miguel, evidently flustered, explain loosely your relationship to each other and how it's merely professional (to one curly-headed third grader, though, it's not—but she'd never tell you and her father that. At least not now.).
Single Father!Miguel who tags along to Gabriella's after school soccer practice for once and despite your protests about you not wanting to interfere "family time", Miguel and his daughter convince you to come watch her like you usually did on Wednesdays. He says he doesn't mind at all and if anything, could use your presence there to ease his nerves since he'd be a newcomer to the soccer parent group.
Single Father!Miguel who watches attentively to how you support Gabriella on the field from the sidelines. He wonders tenaciously if you've fallen into routine of this—from helping her get ready into her uniform to offering small suggestions that help her on the soccer field. He doesn't miss the way her eyes go towards you whenever she did something right and he especially catches onto the fact that she would gush in pure happiness from your approval when you would throw a thumbs up or a delighted nod.
Single Father!Miguel who merely blinks at the compliments given by the two friendly soccer mom next to him.
"Gabi does certainly look a lot like you, but she still has (Y/N)'s beauty and kindness, doesn't she?"
"Oh yes, I agree. Your wife is nothing less of lovely, you know, you're a very lucky man, Mr. O'Hara!"
He's so caught up in trying to process both their words and Gabriella's action on the field, that it doesn't register to him until a few moments later. Miguel attempts to butt in, saying that you're just his subordinate, but when a loud cheer from the other team erupts through, his words fail him.
Single Father!Miguel whose mind is still so stuck on what the soccer moms had said about you that he didn't even realize Gabriella had made the winning goal for today's practice match. Lying through his teeth when asked about if he saw it from her, he realizes that perhaps he should start viewing you in a different light rather than just his daughter's babysitter because the way that Gabriella looks at you with such elation when you congratulate her on her win pulls at his heartstrings ever so slightly.
Single Father!Miguel who contemplates over and over again if he should be doing this—inviting you to Gabriella's first game of the season—the two purchased tickets he held in his fist. You've entered his home a dozen of times, but this would be the first time in three years that he was outside of your own residence. He thinks he's too dressed up for the occasion, cladded in a white button up and black dress pants. A voice asks him if he's his daughter's boyfriend, and Miguel whips around to face an elderly man with a questioned look on his face.
Single Father!Miguel who realizes that it's your father standing in front of him, spare key in hand. He's quick to say no (to your father's disappointment), and introduces himself as your superior. Your father invites Miguel inside your apartment, telling him that you were out fetching groceries and jokingly mentions he uses this opportunity to sneakily fill your cabinets and fridge of food. Your father complains you're too independent for your own good, but he can't exactly blame you—you grew up that way.
Single Father!Miguel who learns that once in your life you were just like his daughter and that in one point in your father's life, he was just like Miguel. All details shared from him, he learns that your mother passed away early in your life due to cancer and ultimately left you and your father to fend for yourselves. Your father tells Miguel that you often had helped out even when you didn't need to—and it doesn't take long for Miguel to piece the pieces together. Why you barely complain about the extra workload, why your father said you're too autonomous, and why all those years ago you not only sympathized with Miguel, but understood his situation as you came from the same exact upbringing.
Single Father!Miguel who listens intently when your father quietly tells him that all he wants for you is to find a good man that would be able to take care of you properly because he believes he wasn't able to. Miguel is quick to reassure him, however, that he did a fantastic job raising a selfless, humble woman that grew to be compassionate and considerate of others' needs, that you were the hardest worker he had ever seen and that he shouldn't discredit himself. Your father goes to examine Miguel for a moment before letting out a loud, haughty laugh in your apartment and jokingly (not really) tells Miguel he hopes that you'll marry him one day, or at least someone like him.
Single Father!Miguel whose resolve dissipates when you walk into your apartment to find your boss and your father talking amongst each other. He sits silently and awkwardly as you complain to your father about dropping by without any warning before you ask him what was he doing here in the first place. Your father takes his leave, winking at Miguel with a glint in his eye, leaving you two in your apartment alone.
Single Father!Miguel who finally gathers up the courage to ask you if you'd like to attend Gabriella's soccer game with him. You interject with visible hesitation, telling him that it was implied that it was a family-only event and you'd hate to intrude onto something so intimate, but he's quick to reassure you that his daughter would love to have you there considering all the help you had given her during her practices—if anything, she would need you there for your support.
Single Father!Miguel who tells you that Gabriella had shown visible distress last night when Miguel told her that you might not be able to come due to your non-familial relationship with them. He almost begged you to come with them, as Gabriella had even threatened to quit soccer altogether if you weren't there to witness her first game. When you give in after moments of contemplation, Miguel truly couldn't believe his luck.
Single Father!Miguel who roots alongside you for Gabriella and her team, watching oh so closely just in case someone from the other team did a dirty trick on his precious daughter. He'd sometimes occasionally glance at you, only to see you completely zoned in and focused on Gabriella's playing like the rest of the parents, offering your support through compliments and encouragements that his daughter always caught and would visibly improve from. When she finally scores the winning goal per usual, she's quick to ignore the cheers coming from her teammates and parents to run off the field and not look for Miguel first, but for you.
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"Did you see me?!" Gabriella exclaims excitedly as she flings her arms around your waist. "Did you see what I did?!"
"I did, yes," you laugh, attempting not to stumble over from the impact with visible glee and crouch down to her height. Pride written all over your face, you grin. "And I'm so incredibly proud of you."
"It's 'cause I did what you taught me," she declares. "I pointed first and then I shooted!" She uses hand gestures to reanimate her play on the field.
"Shot, Gabi," you correctly gently, your fingers going to automatically comb out the tangles out of her hair like you usually did after practices. "It does come handy, doesn't it?"
"Yeah!" Her eyes go to see Miguel, who doesn't stalk too far behind with open arms and the same proud look painted on his face. "Dad! Didja see me?! Didja see that I scored?!"
Miguel lets out a once-in-a-blue-moon chuckle and lifts his daughter into his arms, her arms wrapping around his neck in an affirming hug. "I saw very clearly, mi cariño, and I can't wait to brag about how my daughter scored the winning shot for her team," he compliments warmly.
Gabriella goes to point gleefully in your direction. "It was all because of Miss. (Y/N)," she declares, not knowing that her statement would make a rush of heat bloom onto your face.
"O-oh no... I only... w-well," you stammer out meekly, trying to find the right words. "I'm actually not too knowledgeable on soccer... I only repeated what I found online and—"
"Thank you," Miguel starts off fondly. "(Y/N), truly. Thank you."
You stare at him. "Mr. O'Hara..."
He sets Gabriella down for her to join her rejoicing teammate and pats the small of your back with a grateful look plastered on his face. You were so used to seeing the rather stoic and often tired side of Miguel O'Hara that you forgot he, too, was capable of smiling at times, so when you spotted the small of a grin on his lips that was for you specifically, you felt something in your chest jerk a little bit.
"If it weren't for you being here," he starts off quietly so only you can hear. "Gabi wouldn't have participated at all. She wanted you to come so she'd have enough courage to play because she was so used to you supporting her," Miguel glances at his daughter giggling about on the field. "So it was understandable that if her biggest supporter wasn't here to cheer her on, she wouldn't exactly do her best."
You blink slowly at him, digesting his words in order to truly savor them for all that they were. "I was just—"
"—doing your job?" Miguel finishes for you. He shakes his head. "Last time I remember, 'attending your boss's daughter's soccer games' wasn't on your job description," he says, earning a soft chuckle out of you despite his rather flat tone.
"I suppose so," you murmur with an evident warmth in your eyes, one that Miguel is sure Gabriella has seen numerous times and will continue to welcome as long as you're around.
So when after a dinner celebration at her favorite restaurant, after the star player is tucked into bed after a long day's work, Miguel takes it upon himself to do the what he thought was the impossible for him but possible for Gabriella.
"Stay safe out there," Miguel directs quietly as he helps you put on your coat again. "And again, thank you for today."
"It was my pleasure, Mr. O'Hara," you reply, "And I actually had fun today, so I can thank you for that."
He escorts you down the apartment complex to the lobby and begins to watch you leave, the words on his tongue tipping ever so slowly before they spill the moment you're about to exit through the doors.
"(Y/N)."
At the sound of your voice, you turn to him with a questioning look on your face. "... yes?"
Miguel opens and closes his mouth like a fish for a couple of seconds before blurting out, "Are you free tomorrow evening?"
He scans your face for a reaction before surprise paints itself on your moonlit features. "I-I suppose I am," you nod slowly. "May I ask why?"
"Gabi is having a sleepover at one of her teammate's house," Miguel coughs out and shoves his hands into his pockets to hide their fidgeting.
"Do you need me to drop her off...?" you ask, clearly puzzled.
"No, um," he clears his throat again. "I was... I was actually wondering if you'd... if you'd like to check out that new restaurant that opened up on Clark..."
Regret pools in his mouth the second it falls from his lips and he begins to internally conjure some sort of half-assed lie, perhaps saying something along the lines of the company wanted him to review it for a potential cater in the future or that a friend of his worked there, but when he sights your eyes softening with the same warmth from earlier, he lets you take the reigns on fate.
"I'd quite like that," you murmur, a modest smile on your lips.
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a/n ; i told you i was going to give into temptation. wrote this on a plane with no wifi on the way here (thank god for offline editing!)
anyways, i'm trying to squeeze this bit out before my plane ride tmrw since i've been travelling for the past week and a half! i'll be returning home soon where i can finally write to my heart's content, phew! i just reallyyyyy wanted to write something for miguel adjdjfkfalwf but fear not! we shall be back to our regularly scheduled program soon!
as always, thank you for reading and likes+comments+reblogs are always appreciated and never unnoticed(╹◡╹)♡!
10K notes · View notes
sadnymi · 3 months ago
Text
Mastermind
[Mattheo riddle x reader]
Summary: Lady Whistledown and Gossip Girl [ Hogwarts Version] had taken the school by storm. Every week, spoken letters delivered the latest rumors, and things were getting out of control. Y/N had finally had enough, especially when the latest gossip claimed she was dating Mattheo Riddle. Frustrated and determined to put an end to it, she went to Mattheo, asking for his help in uncovering the person behind the relentless rumors and stopping them once and for all.
Words: 15k
Warnings : fluff, smut smut smut don’t read in public you have been warning , biker boy mattheo [yes a warning] , a little angst, fluff .
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**The Daily Whisperer: Hogwarts Edition**
_Issue #47: The Gossip of the Week_
Hogwarts is buzzing with the latest speculation surrounding two of our most enigmatic students. You guessed it—Y/N Y/L/N and Mattheo Riddle.
Rumor has it that sparks are flying between these two, and if they aren't already an item, then Merlin’s beard, they definitely should be! A sighting in the library, some lingering glances in Potions class, and let’s not forget that mysterious detention they both just _happened_ to land in last week. Could this be the beginning of a legendary Hogwarts love story? But that's not all! This week’s flying letters brought us another sizzling scoop: Y/N was seen practicing dueling spells with Mattheo, and let's just say, the sparks were flying—literally. Could this be a sign of something more than just friendly competition? Stay tuned, dear readers. We’re on the case!
In other news, Y/N has been making waves not just in the rumor mill but in the academic arena as well. This ( whatever house you’re in, darling Y/N!) has been impressing professors and students alike with her spellwork and potions prowess. Is there anything she can't do? We'll keep you posted on her latest achievements and, of course, any further developments in her relationship status with a certain handsome Slytherin.
Until next time, keep your wands at the ready and your ears to the ground!
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I could feel the heat of a hundred eyes on me as I stormed through the hallways, clutching the latest edition of "Hogwarts Whispers" in my hand. My anger was palpable, a tangible force pushing people aside as they gawked at me. As I turned a corner, a group of Hufflepuffs quickly scattered, clearly not wanting to be on the receiving end of my wrath. My anger flared hotter. Who had the nerve to spread such nonsense? And why did it have to be always about _me_?
Finally, I spotted him. Mattheo Riddle stood by the entrance to the Great Hall, casually leaning against the wall like he didn’t have a care in the world, his dark hair falling effortlessly into place as he exchanged easy banter with his friends. Typical.
I marched up to him, my footsteps echoing off the stone walls. His friends wisely took a step back as I approached, but he merely glanced over at me with that infuriating smirk of his, clearly amused by my arrival.
“Riddle,” I said, my voice clipped.
“Y/L/N,” he replied, raising an eyebrow in a way that made it impossible to tell if he was mocking me or just genuinely interested.
“We need to talk.”
His smirk widened, his eyes gleaming with mischief. “We need to talk?”
I huffed in frustration. “You didn’t read what that freak wrote today?”
“No,” he said slowly, his eyes scanning my face for any clue. “But does that have anything to do with why people are looking at us like we are about to say our vows?”
Resisted the urge to roll my eyes, instead grabbing his hand and pulling him down the hallway. “Come on.”
He chuckled under his breath, clearly enjoying the situation more than he should. But I didn’t care. I wasn’t about to have this conversation in front of the entire school. The last thing I needed was to give those gossipy little owls more fuel for their fire.
I could feel his gaze on me as we walked, his hand warm in mine, and for a brief, fleeting moment, I wondered if there was any truth to what they’d written.
But I shoved that thought aside as we reached a secluded corner. I had a bone to pick with him, and I wasn’t about to let a few stray butterflies distract me.
“What are we going to do about this?” I demanded as soon as we were out of earshot of anyone else.
He just grinned, clearly unfazed. “What do you mean, Y/N? Sounds like we’re the hottest topic in school.”
My glare deepened. “This isn’t funny, Mattheo.”
“Maybe not.”
“This is absolute bullshit!” I fumed, waving the gossip letter around like it was cursed. “Why would anyone write this? Why is it always about me? Every. Single. Week!”
Mattheo leaned casually against the wall, his arms crossed, watching me with that maddening smile on his face. He didn’t seem the least bit concerned, which only fueled my irritation further.
“And then they say I’m dating you?” I threw the letter on a desk, feeling my pulse racing. “Are they insane? Where do they even get this stuff?”
He chuckled, that deep, velvety sound that always seemed to get under my skin. “I’m trying so hard not to take that personally, princess.”
I shot him a glare. “Shut up, Riddle.”
But he didn’t stop smiling, just kept leaning against the wall, looking at me like he was thoroughly enjoying the show. My frustration bubbled over. “Why are you so calm about this? This is serious! People are staring at us in the hallways! It’s like they’ve all got nothing better to do than imagine some ridiculous romance between us.”
“Well,” he drawled, pushing off the wall and taking a few steps toward me, “can you blame them? You’re not exactly easy to ignore, Y/N.”
I rolled my eyes, exasperated. “This isn’t funny. We need to find out who’s behind this, and you’re going to help me.”
Mattheo pushed himself off the wall, taking a step closer to me. "You want me to help you track down the identity of…" he paused, a playful glint in his eyes, "Madam Matchmaker?"
"Yes," I said, narrowing my eyes. "Would you do that?"
He leaned in, his voice dropping to a low murmur. "I would never say no to my girlfriend."
"Shut up, Riddle." I stared at him, my heart skipping a beat despite the anger still boiling inside me. "I’m not your girlfriend," I insisted, my voice lacking the conviction I’d hoped for.
He raised an eyebrow, his expression smug. "That’s not what the whole school is saying."
I rolled my eyes, but I couldn’t ignore the way his words sent a shiver down my spine. "Shut up, Riddle."
"Don't you see how ridiculous this is?" I asked, exasperated.
He tilted his head, still not breaking eye contact. "Oh, I see it, alright. But I've got to admit, I don't mind being linked to you, Y/N. It gives me an excuse to spend more time with you."
"Shut up, Riddle."
He laughed, leaning closer, his voice dropping to a near-whisper. "You know, if you keep telling me to shut up, I might just have to find another way to occupy my mouth."
"You… you’re —-!"
"And yet, here you are, asking me for help. You must like something about me, Y/N."
I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest. "I like the idea of you doing something useful for once. Now, are you going to help me or not?"
He straightened up, still smiling but with a more serious glint in his eyes. "Of course I’ll help you. But you owe me one."
"Fine," I grumbled, though I couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at the corners of my mouth.
The next day, I stormed into the Great Hall, clutching a rolled-up piece of parchment in my hand. I barely noticed the whispers that trailed behind me as I made a beeline for the Slytherin table, my eyes locking onto Mattheo, who was lounging back in his seat, looking completely unbothered by the chaos swirling around us.
I slammed the parchment down in front of him, making a few Slytherins glance over in curiosity.
“What’s this?” he asked.
“It’s a list,” I said, taking a seat across from him and ignoring the way his friends were watching us with interest. “A list of suspects. I’ve narrowed it down to a few possibilities, and we need to figure out who’s responsible.”
Mattheo’s eyes flicked to the parchment, then back to me, clearly intrigued. “Go on.”
I pointed to the first name on the list. “First, there’s Carla knight. She’s always had it out for me ever since that incident in Potions last year. You know, she’s been looking for a way to get back at me ever since, she’s petty enough to spread rumors, and she’s got the connections to get them published.”
“True,” Mattheo mused, leaning back in his chair. “But Carla’s too obvious, don’t you think? She’s not exactly subtle.”
“Maybe,” I conceded, moving on to the next name. “Then there’s John Gary. He’s always been the quiet type, but that just makes him more dangerous. He’s close to the source, and he’s smart enough to cover his tracks.”
Mattheo nodded, a small smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Interesting."
"What about Lavender Brown? She’s always gossiping, and she’s got this diary she carries around everywhere. What if she’s the one writing this stuff down and sending it off to ‘Hogwarts Whispers’?"
"Lavender’s a possibility," Mattheo admitted, his eyes flicking back up to meet mine. "But she’s more into writing about her own love life than anyone else’s. I doubt she’d be focused enough to keep tabs on us."
I grumbled under my breath and tapped my quill against the parchment, staring at the remaining names. "Then who could it be? I’ve gone through almost everyone who’s likely to be involved in this kind of thing, and none of them make sense!"
Mattheo didn’t respond immediately, and I looked up to find him just staring at me, a small, almost secretive smile on his lips.
"What the hell are you doing? Were you even listening?" I demanded, feeling my frustration rise again.
His eyes flicked over my face, lingering on my lips for a moment before he finally spoke. "Oh, I was listening, princess. It’s just hard to focus when you’re looking so damn determined. It’s… distracting."
My heart did a little flip, but I shoved that feeling down and crossed my arms. "This is serious, Riddle. Someone is spreading lies about us, and you’re just sitting here, smirking like it’s all a joke."
He chuckled softly, his eyes still locked on mine. "I’m not laughing at you. I’m just appreciating how hard you’re trying to solve this little mystery. It’s kind of… sexy."
I felt my face heat up, but I wasn’t about to let him derail me. "Stop with the compliments, Mattheo. This is important."
"Sure."
"Shut up, Riddle. I’m serious."
"So am I," he said smoothly, leaning back in his seat, his gaze still locked on mine. "But if you want to focus on this little mystery instead of the much more interesting topic of us, then go ahead."
I rolled my eyes, trying to ignore the way his voice sent a shiver down my spine. "Fine. If you’re not going to help, then at least don’t make this harder than it already is."
Mattheo’s smirk grew as he leaned closer, his voice dropping to a low murmur. "You know, Y/N, there are easier ways to spend time with me than concocting elaborate schemes to solve a mystery that might not even have a culprit."
I blinked, caught off guard by the sudden shift in his tone. "What are you talking about?"
He shrugged casually, his eyes never leaving mine. "Maybe someone’s just trying to push us together, and it’s working. Ever thought about that?"
"Shut up, Riddle," I snapped, though my voice lacked its usual bite.
He chuckled, his gaze never leaving mine. "Only if you make me."
I reached out to smack his arm. "Stop acting like that. This is serious!"
In a flash, Mattheo’s hand shot out, catching my wrist with a firm but gentle grip. His smile was both mischievous and reassuring as he looked at me. "Alright, but only because you’re so charming when you’re worked up."
I pulled my wrist free, trying to hide the flush creeping up my cheeks. "Just—stop distracting me. I need to figure out who’s behind this before it gets any worse."
Mattheo leaned back, still watching me with that unnerving mixture of amusement and interest. "Indeed, lead the way. I’m all ears."
For the rest of the week, I was on a mission. Every day, I dragged Mattheo around the school, from the library to the common rooms, and even to the less frequented corners of the castle. Despite his usual nonchalance, Mattheo followed along without question, his only response being that knowing smile he always seemed to have when he was around me.
We spent hours poring over potential suspects, analyzing their motives, and investigating their whereabouts. Each time I got frustrated or hit a dead end, Mattheo would patiently listen, never interrupting, and only offering occasional comments that were either strangely insightful or just plain distracting.
As we walked through the dimly lit corridors of the castle, I finally vented my frustrations. "This is ridiculous. I’ve talked to nearly everyone I can think of, and no one seems to know anything. It’s like we’re running in circles."
Mattheo’s hand brushed against mine as he walked beside me, and I could feel the warmth of his touch even through our robes. "Maybe you’re looking too hard. Sometimes, the answer isn’t in what people say but in what they don’t."
I sighed, feeling the weight of the week’s frustration pressing down on me. "I just don’t get it. Why would someone target me like this?"
He glanced at me, his expression softening. "Maybe they’re trying to get a reaction out of you."
His words, though comforting, did little to ease my worries. I shook my head and kept walking, the silence between us stretching as we turned another corner. "I don’t know how you manage to stay so calm about all this. I’m losing my mind trying to figure this out."
"You’re doing great."
"Thanks, Mattheo."
He flashed me a reassuring smile. "Anytime. Besides, it’s been… interesting, spending all this time with you. I’d say it’s been the highlight of my week."
I raised an eyebrow, giving him a wry smile. "Oh, is that so? I’m glad to be your highlight, Riddle."
He grinned, his usual mischievous glint in his eye. "You should be. And if you ever need me to be a distraction! again, just let me know."
" I hope not."
As we turned another corner in the castle, Mattheo suddenly stopped, his expression shifting from his usual playful smirk to something more serious. "Go on a date with me."
I froze, staring at him in disbelief. "What?"
"You heard me," he said, leaning against the wall with that infuriatingly confident look on his face. "Let’s go on a date."
I blinked, trying to process his words. "Why would I—what are you even talking about? We’re supposed to be figuring out who’s spreading these rumors, not giving them more fuel for the fire!"
"Exactly," he replied smoothly, crossing his arms over his chest. "If we go on a date, we can see who’s watching us, who’s interested in what we’re doing. It’ll flush out the culprit. And with the weekend coming up, whoever’s behind this will be desperate for more gossip to spread. We’ll be able to figure it out, Y/N."
I shook my head, utterly incredulous. "Absolutely not. I’m not going on a date with you."
"Why not?" he asked, his smirk returning as he stepped closer, his presence as magnetic as ever. "It’s the perfect plan. We’ll be able to spot who’s paying too much attention to us."
"Because," I stammered, feeling my heart race as he closed the distance between us, "it’s ridiculous! You’re just trying to mess with me. I know you, Mattheo. You don’t actually care about solving this, you just want to—"
"Want to what?" he interrupted, his voice low and teasing. "Think about it, Y/N. We go out, see who’s watching, think of it as an experiment. A way to gather evidences. You like evidence, don’t you?"
"I’m not going on a date with you. I refuse to give these gossips exactly what they want. I’m not some pawn in their game, and I’m certainly not going to parade around with you just to see who’s got their eyes on us."
He just kept smiling, his eyes locked onto mine with that infuriatingly calm, knowing look. "You keep telling yourself that, but deep down, you know it’s the best way to figure this out."
"No," I insisted, my voice rising slightly. "There’s no way I’m doing it. This is absurd, and I’m not falling for it. You’re just trying to—"
"Trying to what?" he echoed, taking another step closer until I could feel the warmth of his breath on my skin.
I glared at him, trying to ignore the way my pulse quickened. "Shut up, Riddle."
He didn’t move, his smirk widening as his gaze held mine. "You tell me to shut up again, and I will kiss the fuck out of you, princess."
I froze, my breath catching in my throat. "What?"
"You heard me," he said, his voice smooth and deliberate, his eyes never leaving mine. "That’s the deal. You say it again, and I won’t hold back."
My face felt like it was on fire, and I could barely form a coherent thought as his words sank in. "You—you’re insane."
"Maybe," he replied, his voice low and full of intent. "But I always get what I want. And right now, what I want is to figure this out—with you."
I swallowed hard, my heart racing as I tried to gather my thoughts. "This is ridiculous."
"Is it?" he asked, tilting his head slightly, his gaze still locked onto mine. "Or is it just that you’re afraid you might actually enjoy it?"
I stared at him, my mind spinning as I tried to come up with a response. But the truth was, I was too flustered to think straight. His confidence, his intensity—it was overwhelming.
"This is stupid," I muttered, trying to muster up some semblance of defiance.
"That’s not a ‘no’."
I glared at him, my heart pounding in my chest. "But this is strictly for the sake of finding out who’s behind the rumors."
Mattheo’s grin widened. "Of course, princess. Strictly business."
I crossed my arms, trying to keep a lid on the flurry of emotions swirling inside me. "You have to behave, Riddle. No funny business, no flirting. Just… business."
"I’ll be on my best behavior."
I raised an eyebrow, trying to gauge if he was being sincere or just playing me. "Somehow, I doubt that."
He chuckled, leaning in slightly saying in a mocking tone. "Your doubt wounds me, Y/N. My favorite thing to do is to be a good boy for you."
I rolled my eyes, but couldn’t suppress the small smile tugging at my lips. "Sure, whatever you say."
"So," he continued, ignoring my skepticism, "tomorrow, then?"
I hesitated, then nodded. "Yeah, tomorrow."
Mattheo’s gaze softened, though his smirk remained firmly in place. "Don’t be nervous. And try not to think about me too much tonight."
I scoffed, giving him a withering look. "In your dreams, Riddle."
He leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a low, husky murmur. "Oh, believe me, darling. You’re in my dreams every night. But we’re not just talking in them."
My face burned as I smacked his arm again, harder this time. "I’m going to just kill you someday and stop the rumors you’re insufferable, you know that?"
He just laughed, clearly enjoying himself far too much. "And yet, you keep coming back for more."
"I don’t have a choice," I shot back, starting to walk toward my dormitory with him following close behind.
"Ah, but you do," he said smoothly, keeping pace with me. "And you’re choosing to be here with me. Makes you wonder, doesn’t it?"
I ignored him, focusing on the corridor ahead, even as I felt his gaze lingering on me.
We walked in silence for a moment before he spoke again, his voice soft and teasing. "You know, tomorrow’s going to be fun. You’ll see."
I rolled my eyes, still facing forward. "If by ‘fun’ you mean torturous, then sure."
Mattheo’s laughter echoed through the corridor, warm and rich. "Torturous for you, maybe. But for me? It’ll be heaven."
I stopped in front of my dormitory, turning to face him. "This is where we part ways."
He stepped closer, his eyes gleaming with that familiar mischief. "For now. But you know, you can always invite me in if you’re feeling lonely."
Pushing him away lightly I said. "Not a chance, Riddle."
He grinned, completely unfazed. "Worth a shot."
I gave him a look, and for once, he seemed to back down. "Alright, alright. Sleep well, Y/N. And try not to think too much about tomorrow. Or about me."
I slammed the door shut in his face, cutting off his words, but I could still hear his low chuckle from the other side. Then I leaned against the door, trying to steady my racing heart.
I don’t know what’s happening to me. I’ve been on plenty of dates before, so why does this one feel different? I’ve had Quidditch players asking me out, and even the prince of Eldoria once tried his luck, but none of that made me feel as nervous as I am right now. And this isn’t even a real date. It’s just a… mission, right?
I stared at the mess of clothes strewn across my room, feeling utterly lost. Is this too much? Will I be overdressed if I wear it? Or is this too casual? And I can’t stop thinking about him—nope, we won’t do that. We won’t think about him or what he’s going to wear. Or not wear. No, absolutely not. We are not thinking about him without clothes. That can’t happen. I can’t stand Mattheo, right?
But why? Why can’t I stand him? I can’t remember anymore. Maybe it’s because he makes me feel so damn nervous? And I hate that. I hate losing control. I love having control over everything, and Merlin knows he wasn’t helping with that. It’s like every cell in my body is screaming, and I mean every single one.
I finally settled on a small black dress, letting my hair fall naturally around my shoulders. I added a touch of makeup and a simple necklace, convincing myself that I was doing this for me. It’s a good chance to get dressed up and look good—to myself, right? I always do. I’m a fashion icon, and I always dress well. Not for any certain someone with beautiful eyes and hair and a body that—nope, stop it, Y/N. We’re not going there.
I took a deep breath and walked out of my dorm, only to find Mattheo standing just outside my door, hand raised as if he was about to knock. He was dressed all in black, and oh, Merlin, that shirt was doing things to me.
His eyes slowly raking up and down my body. He wasn’t even trying to hide that he was looking, and when his gaze finally reached my face, it lingered on my lips before meeting my eyes.
"Matching," he said, a smirk playing on his lips.
I rolled my eyes, trying to ignore the flutter in my stomach. "You always wear black or gray, It’s hardly a coincidence Mattheo."
His smirk widened as he took a step closer. "Oh, baby, so you were trying to match with me?"
"What? Of course not!" I shot back, but my voice sounded less convincing than I would’ve liked. He laughed, clearly enjoying my discomfort.
I glared at him, crossing my arms. "If you don’t stop, I’m going back inside and forgetting about this so-called date,"
He raised his hands in mock surrender, still grinning. "Okay, okay, I’m sorry. You look stunning, Y/N. Absolutely breathtaking. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to focus on anything but you tonight."
I rolled my eyes again, though I could feel my cheeks heating up. "You’re so insufferable."
"And you’re so beautiful," he replied smoothly, taking my hand in his. "Now come on. Let’s get out of here."
I allowed him to lead me out of the castle, my heart pounding harder with every step. "Where are we going?"
"You’ll see," he said, a hint of mischief in his voice. "I promise it’s something you’ll like."
I narrowed my eyes at him. "If you’re up to something, Riddle, I swear—"
"Oh, I’m definitely up to something," he replied, his voice dropping to a low murmur as he glanced over at me, his eyes darkening slightly. "But I think you’ll enjoy it. Maybe even more than you expect."
My breath caught in my throat, and I tried to keep my voice steady. "You’re not fooling anyone, you know."
"Who said I was trying to fool you?" he shot back, his grip on my hand tightening slightly.
I tried to ignore the way his words made my pulse quicken. "You’re being annoyingly cryptic, you know that?"
"It’s part of my charm," he replied , his thumb brushing lightly over the back of my hand. "And besides, it’s worth the suspense, don’t you think?"
I looked at him, trying to maintain some semblance of composure. "I think you’re enjoying this far too much."
He chuckled, his eyes darkening with a mischievous glint. "Oh, I am. But don’t pretend you aren’t, too."
As Mattheo led me down the dimly lit corridor, I couldn't help but notice the way his thumb was now tracing small circles on the back of my hand. The warmth of his touch sent shivers up my spine, and I fought to keep my thoughts from spiraling out of control.
My breath hitched slightly, but I forced myself to stay calm. "You’re really pushing it, Riddle."
"And you love it," he shot back, his voice dropping to a whisper as he leaned in closer, his breath warm against my ear.
I pushed him away pretending to be annoyed it’s actually better to show him that I was so turned on. "Let’s just get this over with."
“Where are we going?” I asked, trying to inject some firmness into my voice, though it came out softer than I intended.
Mattheo glanced at me, a slow, almost predatory smile spreading across his lips. “Patience, darling."
I opened my mouth to retort, but the words got caught in my throat. The cool night air hit me like a wave, but it did little to quell the heat burning inside me.
“You look like you’re trying really hard not to think about what I’m going to do to you tonight,” he whispered, his voice low and teasing.
I froze, my heart skipping a beat. “What… what are you talking about?”
He chuckled softly, pulling me closer until our bodies were nearly touching. “Oh, come on, Y/N. Don’t pretend you haven’t thought about it. About what it would feel like.”
My breath hitched, and I couldn’t stop the rush of heat that flooded my body at his words. This wasn’t happening. I wasn’t letting him get to me like this. But when he stepped closer, his hand resting lightly on my hip, I could barely think straight.
“I… I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I stammered, though it was clear even to me that I was lying.
“Liar,” he whispered, his lips brushing against my ear, sending a shiver down my spine. “You’ve been thinking about it. And the best part? So have I.”
I blinked up at him, trying to form a coherent response when he suddenly smirked and pointed behind me. “Relax, darling. I was talking about the ride I’m going to give you tonight.”
I followed his gaze and saw a sleek black motorcycle parked nearby. “Wait… what?” I breathed out, my heart still racing.
His smirk deepened, and he raised an eyebrow, amusement dancing in his eyes. “What were _you_ thinking about?”
“Nothing!” I shot back, far too quickly.
“Uh-huh,” he said, clearly not buying it. He started walking toward the bike, and I followed, my steps hesitant.
“What the hell is that?” I asked, narrowing my eyes at the motorcycle as if it had personally offended me.
He looked at me with exaggerated innocence. “This? It’s a bike. You know, that thing with two wheels that goes vroom?”
I glared at him, my patience wearing thin. “I know exactly what it is. I’m asking why you’re near it.”
He leaned against the bike, looking far too smug for his own good."Because we’re taking it for a ride, obviously."
“Mattheo, you didn’t… Where did you even get this from?” I asked, crossing my arms.
He grinned mischievously. “Stole it.”
My eyes widened, and I took a step back, ready to bolt. But then he laughed, shaking his head. “Kidding, darling. Just get on.”
I stared at him for a moment, debating whether I should turn around and walk back inside. But something about the way he was looking at me—challenging, teasing—made me pause. I cursed under my breath and reluctantly walked over to the bike.
As I approached, I couldn’t help but curse myself for wearing a dress. Of all nights, why did I choose tonight to be impractical? I awkwardly tried to swing my leg over the bike, careful not to flash him.
“Need some help there?”
“I’ve got it,” I snapped, finally managing to get on the bike without embarrassing myself too much.
He turned to face me, and suddenly, he was so close I could feel his breath on my face. His hands reached up, and he gently placed a helmet on my head, securing the strap under my chin. The simple act was far more intimate than it had any right to be, and I found myself holding my breath.
“You might want to hold on to me,” he murmured, his voice low and filled with suggestion.
I hesitated for a second, then wrapped my arms around his waist, feeling the solid warmth of him beneath my hands. “If you crash this thing, I’m killing you,” I muttered against his back.
He chuckled, the sound vibrating through me. “Don’t worry, darling. I’ve got you.”
he started the bike, the engine roaring to life beneath us. I tightened my grip on him as we took off, the wind whipping through my hair. The cool night air rushed past us, but all I could focus on was the heat radiating from Mattheo’s body, the way his muscles tensed and flexed as he maneuvered the bike through the darkened streets.
“Enjoying yourself back there?” he called over the sound of the wind.
I rolled my eyes, even though he couldn’t see it. “Just keep your eyes on the road, Riddle.”
He laughed again, but there was a dark edge to it that sent a shiver down my spine. “Oh, I am. But I can’t help but think about how good you feel pressed up against me.”
My cheeks burned, and I was grateful he couldn’t see my face. “Shut up, Mattheo.”
" careful baby remember our deal?"
“Mattheo—”
“ Yes,princess?"
" don’t open your mouth please."
He laughed " Why? You don’t like it when I talk about how your hands feel on me? Or how I can feel every little movement you make?”
“No—”
“Or maybe it’s the way you’re clinging to me right now,” he continued, his voice dropping lower, more seductive. “Like you can’t get close enough. Like you don’t want this ride to end.”
I bit my lip, trying to ignore the way his words were making my heart race even faster. He was doing this on purpose, and damn him, it was working.
“Don’t get too full of yourself,” I shot back, but my voice lacked the bite I intended.
He slowed the bike down slightly, and I felt him lean back just enough to speak directly into my ear. “Too late for that, darling. You’re driving me crazy.”
My breath caught, and I tightened my grip on him, unsure if it was to steady myself or if it was because part of me wanted him to pull over.
“Mattheo…” I warned, but my voice was weak, trembling.
He chuckled, the sound dark and promising. “Relax."
Every time he took a sharp turn or sped up, my grip on him tightened, and he would laugh softly, his voice full of that infuriating confidence. “You sure you’re not nervous?”
“I’m sure,” I replied, though my heart was racing for more reasons than just the speed of the bike.
“Good.”
As Mattheo slowed the bike to a stop, I looked around and felt a jolt of unease settle in my stomach. The area was dimly lit, with groups of people loitering around, looking like trouble. The girls wore little more than scraps of fabric, their heavy makeup making their eyes look like dark smudges in the faint light. The guys weren’t any better—tough, dangerous, and clearly up to no good.
I turned to Mattheo, my voice tinged with irritation and confusion. “What the hell, Mattheo?”
He smirked, swinging his leg off the bike. “What? I thought you’d appreciate something different from the fancy dates you’re used to. Oh, remind me again, where did Prince Edward take you to?”
“He didn’t,” I snapped back, dismounting the bike as gracefully as possible while trying to keep my dress in place. “Because I turned the date down.”
Mattheo’s grin widened, a mocking edge to it. “How bad for him.”
I rolled my eyes, glancing around nervously. “There’s no one from school here, right? I mean, how is the gossip mill going to work if they don’t notice us?”
He leaned against the bike, his eyes glinting with mischief. “Oh, they won’t.”
“Excuse me?” I shot back, incredulous.
He laughed, shaking his head. “They’ll be more likely to be notice here than some fancy place, don’t you think?”
I frowned but nodded reluctantly. “Probably, yeah. Any normal person would feel so out of place here.”
I was about to step off the bike when I felt his hands suddenly on my hips, his grip firm. “No, not like that, princess.”
“What?” I managed to say, my voice coming out in a breathless whisper as he effortlessly swung off the bike first. Then, without warning, he placed his hands on my waist again and lifted me off the bike as if I weighed nothing.
“I wouldn’t want anyone to get a look at the show I had a minutes ago,” he murmured, his voice a low rumble that sent shivers down my spine.
My face flushed crimson, and I struggled to maintain my composure as his hands stayed on my waist, guiding me toward the entrance. His touch was possessive, almost claiming, and I couldn’t help the thrill that shot through me despite the chaotic surroundings.
“So, do I need to keep my wand close?” I asked, half-joking, half-serious as we neared the group.
Mattheo chuckled, his breath warm against my ear. “You really think I’d let anything happen to you?”
As we walked through the crowd, people began to notice Mattheo, their eyes lighting up with recognition. A couple of guys came over, greeting him with casual nods and low murmurs.
“Riddle! Didn’t expect to see you here tonight,” one of them said, a tall guy with a crooked grin.
Another guy came up, clapping Mattheo on the back. “Good to see you, mate. Thought you’d ditched us for good.”
“Nah,” Mattheo replied casually. “Just been busy.”
“Yeah, thought you were too good for us these days,” another chimed in, smirking.
Mattheo just shrugged, his grip on my waist tightening slightly. “Can’t forget where I came from.”
Before I could process what that meant, a girl suddenly appeared, practically throwing herself at Mattheo. She had wild, dark hair and wore a top that could barely be called clothing. “Matty! I didn’t know you were coming tonight,” she purred, her hands already trailing over his chest. Then, she noticed me, her eyes narrowing as she looked me up and down, clearly sizing me up.
I met her gaze, lifting my chin defiantly as I looked her over. She was all beautiful and confidence, but something about her screamed desperate. I couldn’t help the surge of jealousy that flared in my chest. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer,” I snapped, crossing my arms.
The girl’s eyes widened in surprise, but she quickly recovered, her lips curling into a sneer. “Who’s this?” she asked Mattheo, her tone dripping with disdain.
Mattheo’s hand slid around my waist, pulling me closer to him. “She’s My girl,” he said simply, his voice cool and dismissive.
The girl’s eyes narrowed further as she gave me another once-over. I met her gaze head-on, refusing to back down. “Got a problem with that?” I asked, my tone sweet but laced with a clear challenge.
The girl hesitated for a moment, then forced a laugh, trying to play it off. “No, of course not,” she said, but her eyes were still cold. She turned back to Mattheo, trying to regain his attention. “I was just surprised, that’s all.”
“Well, now you know,” I said firmly, stepping closer to Mattheo as if staking my claim.
She shot me one last glare before reluctantly backing off, clearly realizing she wasn’t going to win this one. I watched her go, feeling oddly victorious, even as my heart pounded in my chest.
Mattheo’s low chuckle drew my attention back to him, and I looked up to find him watching me with an amused glint in his eyes. “Jealous, are we?”
“Absolutely not,” I retorted, though my face was still flushed.
“Right,” he drawled, clearly not believing me.
Mattheo guided me through the throngs of people, his hand never leaving my waist as we made our way toward a secluded area. The crowd seemed to part for him, everyone stepping aside as if they knew better than to get in his way. He led me to a corner of the warehouse where a small, dimly lit bar was nestled. The area was quieter, more exclusive, with plush leather couches and a polished wooden bar that gave it an air of importance.
“This is where the VIPs hang out?” I asked, raising an eyebrow as we stepped into the area. It was a stark contrast to the chaos outside—a private sanctuary within the madness.
Mattheo smirked, pulling out a barstool for me before taking a seat himself. “You could say that. Only those who matter get to hang out here.”
I settled onto the stool, trying to maintain some semblance of composure despite the flutter of nerves in my stomach. “And I’m guessing you’re one of those people?”
He chuckled, leaning in closer, his gaze locking onto mine. “What do you think, Princess?”
“I think you like making a scene wherever you go,” I shot back, trying to keep my tone light despite the way my heart was racing.
“Maybe,” he admitted, his eyes gleaming with mischief.
The bartender, a grizzled-looking man with a permanent scowl, approached us, his gaze flickering over me before settling on Mattheo.
“Riddle,” the bartender said in greeting, his voice gruff. “Been a while.”
“Hey, Greg,” Mattheo replied, his voice casual. “How’s business?”
Greg grunted, grabbing a glass and starting to mix a drink. “Same old, same old. You finally got yourself a date, eh?”
Mattheo chuckled, his hand still resting on my thigh. “Something like that.”
Greg's eyes flickered over to me again, his expression a mix of curiosity and skepticism. He took in my dress and my slightly flustered demeanor, a wry grin tugging at his mouth. “She's a fancy one, ain't she?” he commented, continuing to mix the drinks.
“Yeah, that’s for sure,” Mattheo agreed, his hand caressing my thigh. “But she’s all mine.”
I suppressed a shiver at the touch, trying to act as nonchalant as possible as I shot Mattheo a glare. He just smirked in response.
"Noted." Greg set our drinks down in front of us, a shot of dark liquor for Mattheo and something orange and frothy for me. “On the house,” he said gruffly, before moving to serve other customers.
"Can you tell me why those people know you? And how the hell are you so well-known like a famous celebrity here?"
Mattheo takes a sip of his drink, a smirk playing on his lips as he contemplates my question. “I wouldn’t say famous, darling. But I’ve spent a lot of time here... Let’s just say I know my way around.”
I raise an eyebrow skeptically. “That’s not a real answer.”
He grins, clearly enjoying my reaction. “Oh, it's a perfectly real answer. You just don't like it.”
"And what about this girl?" I ask, unable to keep the edge out of my voice.
“That’s Layla. She’s part of this crowd… a regular here, I guess you could say.”
“And you… know her well?”
He shrugs, his hand going back to rest on my thigh. “We’ve crossed paths a few times, yeah.”
There’s something in his tone that makes me pause, a flicker of jealousy stirring in my chest.
He takes another sip of his drink, avoiding my gaze for a moment. “You’re full of questions today, aren’t you?”
I scowl at his non-answer. “You’re the one who keeps avoiding them.”
He lets out a soft laugh, his hand tracing lazy circles on my thigh. “I just like seeing you get all worked up, princess.”
“So what’s your definition of crossing paths?” I ask, pressing him further.
He pauses, seeming to consider his words carefully. “Layla and I have... hooked up a few times. Nothing serious, just casual stuff.”
My heart sinks, a mix of jealousy and disappointment flickering inside me. I try to mask it, though, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of knowing how much it bothered me.
“And what about now? Is she still in the picture?”
His hand tightens slightly on my thigh, and I feel him tense for a moment. Then he turns his head slightly, his lips almost brushing mine as he answers, “No, she’s not.”
“Good,” I say, trying to keep my tone light, “because this whole act would be a lot less convincing if you were involved with more than one girl.”
Mattheo chuckles, the sound low and rich, as his fingers tighten their grip on my thigh, sending a jolt of electricity up my spine. “And here I thought you were just in this for the show,” he murmurs, his voice laced with amusement and something darker, more seductive.
“I am,” I say, my voice steady despite the rapid thudding of my heart. “But even in an act, there are rules.”
“Rules, huh?” He leans in closer, his lips brushing the shell of my ear as he speaks, his breath warm against my skin. “And what are those rules, princess?”
I bite my lip, fighting the urge to close the distance between us. I need to stay in control, to remind myself that this is just an act. “Like keeping your hands to yourself,” I whisper, but the words come out more breathless than I intended.
He chuckles again, a dark, knowing sound. “But where’s the fun in that?”
His hand slides further up my thigh, and I can feel the heat radiating from his body. My pulse quickens, and I struggle to maintain my composure.
“We’re supposed to be pretending,” I manage to say, my voice betraying the strain of keeping up the facade.
“Are we?” His lips graze the corner of my mouth, his words a challenge, daring me to keep up the pretense.
I turn my head slightly, our noses nearly touching, my breath mingling with his. “Yes,” I whisper, but it’s clear neither of us believes it anymore.
“So, just an act?” he repeats, his voice a low rumble that sends shivers down my spine.
I nod, barely managing to keep my composure. “Just an act,” I reply, though the words feel like a lie.
He tilts his head, his lips dangerously close to mine. “But we might as well convince them, right?” His tone is teasing, but there’s a fire in his eyes that says he’s not playing anymore.
I should pull away, tell him no, remind him that this is all part of the charade. But I can’t. My resolve crumbles as I look into his eyes, the intensity there pulling me in, refusing to let go.
“Right,” I whisper, my voice betraying me.
Before I can take another breath, his mouth was on mine, claiming me with a possessiveness that made my breath hitch. His lips moved against mine, slow and deliberate, like he was savoring every second of it. Then, his teeth tugged on my lower lip, and I gasped, giving him the opening he needed.
His tongue slipped inside, tasting and teasing, coaxing mine into a heated dance that left me dizzy. The kiss was all-consuming, each stroke of his tongue demanding a response that I couldn’t help but give. It wasn’t just a kiss; it was a declaration, a promise of everything he could make me feel.
Mattheo’s hand slid up my back, pulling me closer until I was practically melting into him. He sucked on my lower lip, pulling it between his teeth before releasing it with a soft, wet pop. The sound sent a shiver down my spine, and I found myself pressing closer, needing more of him, of this.
“Good girl,” he murmured against my lips, the praise like gasoline to the fire already burning inside me. The words sent a rush of warmth straight to my core, and I couldn’t stop the soft whimper that escaped my throat.
His hands were everywhere—on my hips, my waist, tracing the curve of my spine—as he guided me to straddle his lap. The shift in position made me acutely aware of the hardness pressing against me, a reminder of just how much he wanted this, wanted me.
“Such a good girl for me,” he whispered, his lips trailing down my neck, sucking and biting just enough to leave a mark. His words were a drug, intoxicating and impossible to resist. I could feel the heat pooling low in my belly, a need so intense it was almost painful.
“Mattheo,” I breathed, my hands threading through his hair, pulling him closer, needing him to take more, to give more.
He groaned, the sound vibrating against my skin as his hands gripped my hips, guiding me to grind against him. The friction was maddening, each roll of my hips sending waves of pleasure through me that made it hard to think, hard to breathe.
“You like that?” he asked, his voice rough, laced with a hunger that made my heart race.
“Yes,” I gasped, my nails digging into his shoulders as I rocked against him, desperate for more. His hands moved to my ass, squeezing as he guided my movements, his lips capturing mine again in a kiss that was anything but gentle. It was raw, primal, a clash of tongues and teeth that left me trembling in his arms.
“Good girl,” he repeated, his voice thick with desire as his hands slid under my dress, tracing the edges of my panties. “Such a good girl for me.” The praise was almost too much, his mouth was on mine, sending a fresh wave of heat through my body as I arched into him, needing him to do something, anything to relieve the ache between my thighs.
Reality crashed down on me like a cold wave, dousing the fire that had been raging between us. I was kissing Mattheo Riddle—not just kissing him, but grinding against him in a dark, dingy bar, losing control in a way that was so unlike me.
Breathless, I shook my head, my hands still resting on his chest, but I pushed him away just enough to create space between us. “We shouldn’t,” I whispered, my voice trembling with the effort to regain control.
“Why not?” he murmured.
His hands remained on my hips, firm but not forceful, as if he knew I could—and might—pull away at any moment.
“It’s wrong,” I said, though even as the words left my mouth, they felt hollow. Wrong didn’t even begin to cover the tangled mess of emotions inside me.
“It feels so right to me,” he countered, his voice low.
“That’s the problem,” I whispered, my resolve wavering as I felt the heat of his body so close to mine, the pull of his gaze making it almost impossible to think clearly. I was losing myself, losing the control I prided myself on, every time I was near him.
“Mattheo, I want to go,” I said, my voice firmer this time, though the longing in me betrayed how much I wanted to stay, to give in.
He nodded, understanding flickering in his eyes as he stood up, his hand falling away from my thigh. He kept close to me as we made our way out of the bar, his presence a constant, protective shield, yet he didn’t touch me. And damn, I hated that—hated how much I wanted him to touch me, to feel his hands on me again, even as I knew I shouldn’t.
We reached his bike, and he stood between me and the prying eyes of anyone passing by, shielding me as I climbed on. He still didn’t touch me, and it was driving me insane, the absence of his touch making me crave it even more. I hated myself for it, for wanting him so badly that it was all I could think about.
He climbed on the bike in front of me, starting the engine with a low rumble. My hands automatically went to his waist, and as soon as I made contact, it was like an electric current shot through me. My mind was a mess, a chaotic whirl of thoughts and emotions, and my body—oh, my body—was screaming for more, for him.
I clenched my hands tighter around him, trying to focus, trying to breathe, but the tension inside me was unbearable. The battle raging within me, between what I wanted and what I knew was right, was tearing me apart.
“Stop, Mattheo,” I blurted out, my voice cutting through the night.
He didn’t respond at first, but I felt his body tense under my hands. “What?” he asked, his voice tight, uncertain.
“I said stop,” I repeated, louder this time, and he immediately pulled the bike over to the side of the road, the engine cutting off with a final, ominous growl.
We were on a dark, deserted forest road, the trees casting long, eerie shadows under the moonlight. I got off the bike quickly, putting distance between us, trying to get a grip on the whirlwind of emotions inside me. I walked a few steps away, the cool night air doing nothing to calm the fire burning inside me.
I turned around, my breath catching in my throat as I saw him, standing there, taking off his helmet. His eyes were on me, intense, questioning, filled with something that made my heart race all over again.
Before I knew what I was doing, I was running back to him, my resolve crumbling to dust. I crashed into him, my hands fisting in his shirt as I pulled him down to me, my lips finding his with a desperation I couldn’t control.
His response was immediate, his hands flying to my waist, gripping me tightly as he kissed me back with a fierce, raw passion that left me breathless. His lips moved against mine with a hunger that matched my own, devouring, claiming me in a way that made my knees weak.
He lifted me effortlessly, placing me on the bike with my back against the handlebars, my legs on either side of him as he stepped between them, his body pressing into mine. The cold metal of the bike contrasted sharply with the heat of his body, the hard, unyielding surface beneath me a stark reminder of how exposed, how vulnerable I was.
But I didn’t care. I was beyond caring. I wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him closer, needing to feel every inch of him against me, needing him to take away the ache that was consuming me from the inside out.
His hands roamed over me, possessive, claiming, as he deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding against mine in a way that made me moan into his mouth. He was everywhere—his touch, his taste, his scent—overwhelming my senses until there was nothing left but him.
“Mattheo,” I breathed against his lips, my hands sliding up to cup his face, holding him to me as if letting go would mean losing him forever.
He growled low in his throat, the sound vibrating against my lips as he pulled back slightly, his eyes burning into mine, dark and wild. “You don’t know what you do to me,” he murmured, his voice rough with barely restrained desire.
“Then show me,” I whispered, my voice trembling, both a challenge and a plea.
And he did. His hands moved down to my hips, gripping me firmly as he pulled me closer, his lips descending on mine once more, claiming me, possessing me. The kiss was hard, demanding, every stroke of his tongue, every nip of his teeth, sending shockwaves through me that left me breathless, trembling in his arms.
his hand tracing a teasing line down my side. His breath was hot against my ear as he whispered, “If I were to slip my hand between those pretty thighs right now, would I find you soaking wet, princess?”
A shiver ran through me, his words setting my skin on fire.
“You’d have to do it to find out,” I whispered back, my voice shaky.
His hand slid down to my thigh, gripping it firmly as he pushed the fabric of my dress up, his fingers brushing against the sensitive skin there. The touch was electrifying, sending jolts of pleasure straight to my core, making me gasp.
“Such a good girl,” he murmured, his voice low and rough, dripping with praise that sent another rush of heat through me. His hand moved higher, inching closer to where I needed him most, but he took his time, teasing me, making me squirm against him.
When his fingers finally reached the edge of my panties, he paused, his eyes locking onto mine, a smirk playing on his lips. “You’re already so wet for me,” he said, his voice dripping with satisfaction as he slid one finger along the slick fabric, barely touching me but enough to make my breath hitch.
I bit my lip, fighting back a moan as he continued to tease me, his finger tracing lazy circles over my clit through the thin fabric. The sensation was maddening, the light touch just enough to drive me crazy but not nearly enough to satisfy the aching need inside me.
“Let’s see how wet you really are,” he whispered, slipping his hand inside my panties, his fingers brushing against my slick folds. The contact was enough to make me moan, the sound escaping my lips before I could stop it.
His finger slid along my slit, collecting my wetness before he pressed it against my clit, rubbing slow, deliberate circles that had me arching into his touch, desperate for more. “You’re drenched,” he murmured, his voice laced with approval, his breath hot against my neck as he continued to work me over.
“Mattheo,” I gasped, my hands gripping his shoulders as he curled his finger, finding that perfect spot that made me see stars. He added another finger, the stretch delicious as he pumped them in and out, his thumb brushing against my clit with every movement.
“Look at you princess.” he whispered, his voice a low growl as he continued to finger me, his pace steady and relentless. “You like knowing we’re still in public, don’t you, Y/N? That’s so unlike you….”
His words made my head spin, the combination of his dirty talk and the way his fingers worked me over was too much, too overwhelming. “Nothing I do when I’m with you is like me,” I admitted, my voice breathless as I bucked against his hand, craving more of the pleasure only he could give me. “But nothing has ever felt this good.”
He groaned at my confession, his fingers curling inside me, hitting that perfect spot that had me seeing stars. “Good girl,” he praised again, his voice filled with pride and lust as he kissed me hard, his lips claiming mine with a hunger that left me breathless.
I kissed him back with equal fervor, losing myself in the feel of him, the way his fingers worked me over, driving me closer and closer to the edge. His thumb pressed harder against my clit, his fingers curling inside me in just the right way, sending shockwaves of pleasure through me that made my entire body tremble.
“You’re so fucking perfect,” he growled against my lips, his fingers moving faster, harder, the wet sounds of his fingers working me over filling the dark, empty forest around us. “You’re going to come for me, aren’t you, princess? Come all over my fingers like the good girl you are.”
His words were my undoing, the praise and the dirty talk too much for me to handle. I cried out, my nails digging into his shoulders as I shattered around him, my orgasm ripping through me with a force that left me breathless, clinging to him for support as wave after wave of pleasure washed over me.
Mattheo didn’t stop, his fingers working me through my orgasm, prolonging the pleasure until I was nothing but a trembling, panting mess in his arms. He finally slowed his movements, gently pulling his fingers out of me and bringing them to his lips, his eyes locked onto mine as he licked them clean.
“Fuck, you taste amazing,” he murmured, his voice filled with awe and satisfaction as he pulled me in for another searing kiss, his tongue slipping into my mouth, letting me taste myself on him.
I kissed him back, my heart racing, my body still trembling from the intensity of what he’d just done to me. I knew we were still out in the open, knew that anyone could have seen us, but I didn’t care. All I cared about was him, the way he made me feel, the way he could break down every wall I’d ever built around myself with just a touch, a word, a kiss.
breath was hot against my ear as he whispered, “Would you let me tease you, princess? Let me take my time driving you wild until you’re begging for me?”
His voice was dark, dripping with lust and promise, the words alone sending a shiver down my spine. I could only nod, still panting, my body trembling from the aftershocks of my release. The anticipation of what he was about to do had my heart racing, my breath catching in my throat.
He smirked at my response, his eyes gleaming with wicked intent. “That’s my girl,” he murmured, his hands sliding down to spread my legs wider. I gasped as the cool air brushed against my heated core, my entire body thrumming with a desperate need for more.
Mattheo took his time, starting with a slow, deliberate kiss on the inside of my thigh, just above my knee. His lips were soft, his tongue darting out to taste my skin as he worked his way up, inch by agonizing inch. Each kiss, each lick, sent a fresh wave of arousal through me, making my thighs tremble in anticipation.
He alternated between gentle kisses and slow, teasing licks, his tongue tracing patterns up my inner thigh. The closer he got to where I wanted him most, the more my hips began to shift, desperate for him to end the torment. But he didn’t rush, savoring every moment, every reaction he pulled from me.
When he finally reached the apex of my thighs, he paused, his breath warm against my soaked folds. The anticipation was unbearable, every nerve in my body screaming for him to touch me, to give me the release I was so desperately craving.
“Look at me,” he murmured, his voice laced with dark amusement as he kissed the sensitive skin right beside where I ached for him most.
And then, without warning, his tongue was on me, the first long, slow lick sending a bolt of pleasure straight through me. I cried out, my hips bucking involuntarily as his tongue slid over my folds, his hands gripping my thighs to hold me in place.
He took his time, alternating between slow, teasing licks and firm, deliberate strokes of his tongue over my clit. Every touch was electric, every swirl of his tongue pushing me closer and closer to the edge. I was already so sensitive, still reeling from my first orgasm, and the sensation was almost too much to bear.
“Mattheo, please,” I gasped, my hands threading through his hair, pulling him closer, desperate for more.
He chuckled against me, the vibrations sending another wave of pleasure through me. “Patience, princess,” he murmured, his voice a dark, sinful promise. “I’m just getting started.”
He wrapped his lips around my clit, sucking gently before flicking his tongue over the sensitive nub. The combination of his mouth and the steady rhythm of his tongue was driving me wild, the pleasure building so quickly that it was almost overwhelming.
He kept at it, his tongue working in tandem with his lips, pushing me closer and closer to the edge. My thighs were trembling, my breath coming in short, desperate gasps as the pleasure coiled tight in my belly, ready to snap.
And then he pushed me over the edge, his tongue curling around my clit in a way that made my vision go white. I cried out, my body convulsing as the orgasm tore through me, the pleasure so intense that I couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, could only feel.
He didn’t stop, didn’t give me a moment to recover as he continued to work me through my release, his tongue lapping up every bit of my arousal. The overstimulation was mind-blowing, each flick of his tongue sending another shockwave through my already oversensitive body.
“Mattheo,” I gasped, my voice raw from the intensity of it all. “I can’t—”
“Oh, but you can,” he growled, his voice dark and commanding as he continued his assault on my clit, his fingers sliding back inside me to curl against that spot that made me see stars. “You’re going to cum again, princess. I want to feel you fall apart for me one more time.”
I could barely form a coherent thought, my mind completely consumed by the pleasure he was giving me. I could only nod, my body already climbing toward that peak again, the intensity of it making my head spin.
He finally pulled away, his hands gently holding my thighs as I came down from the high, my body still trembling with the aftershocks. I was completely spent, my mind foggy with pleasure, but Mattheo just grinned up at me, his lips glistening with my arousal.
“Fuck, you’re incredible,” he murmured, his voice thick with satisfaction as he kissed my inner thigh, his fingers gently tracing patterns on my skin. “I could do this all night.”
Tears of pleasure welled in my eyes as I reached for Mattheo, pulling him up to me. I could feel my makeup smeared, my face wet with tears that I knew had streaked down my cheeks, but I didn’t care. All I cared about was him, about the way his lips met mine in a kiss that was as fierce as it was tender.
He kissed me with a hunger that matched my own, his hands cradling my face as if I were something precious, even as I reached down, my fingers fumbling with the buckle of his belt. I could feel how hard he was, could feel the heat radiating from him, and it only made me more desperate, more eager to feel all of him.
But then, to my surprise, he pulled back slightly, his hand catching mine. “No,” he murmured, his voice firm, but there was something in his tone that made me pause, that made me look up into his eyes, confused.
“What? Why?” I asked, my breath hitching, my heart pounding in my chest. The need in me was so overwhelming that I couldn’t understand why he would stop now, not when we were both so clearly on the edge.
He laughed softly, but it wasn’t mocking. It was low and full of a raw affection that sent a shiver down my spine. He leaned in and kissed me again, slow and deep, as if he were trying to pour all of his feelings into that one moment. When he pulled back, he looked into my eyes, his thumb brushing gently over my tear-streaked cheek.
“Believe me, there’s nothing I want more in this world than to bend you over this bike and take you right now, right here,” he whispered, and the words alone were enough to make my legs go weak.
“Then do it,” I pleaded, my voice trembling with both need and frustration. I didn’t care about anything else in that moment; I just wanted him.
But he shook his head, his gaze never leaving mine, his thumb still tracing the line of my cheek.
“No,” he repeated, and before I could protest, before I could beg, he continued, his voice soft but filled with a determination that left me breathless. “When I get to have you, Y/N, I want it to be when I can take my time, when I can make you feel everything I’ve been dying to give you. I don’t want to rush this, to take you in some dark forest where anyone could see. You deserve more than that, more than just a quick fuck.”
His words hit me like a tidal wave, overwhelming in their sincerity, in the sheer weight of what he was saying. I could see it in his eyes, the way he looked at me, like I was the only thing that mattered in the entire world. He wanted more than just my body; he wanted all of me, and he wanted it to be right.
I was speechless, my heart pounding so hard it hurt, and all I could do was stare at him, trying to process everything he had just said. “Mattheo…” I whispered, my voice barely audible, but he silenced me with another kiss, this one gentle, full of a tenderness that brought fresh tears to my eyes.
"Not here, not like this. I want to take my time with you, princess. I want to feel every inch of you, taste every part of you, and make you mine in every possible way.”
I could only nod, tears slipping down my cheeks as I kissed him back, pouring all of my emotions into that kiss. I wanted him so badly it hurt, but I knew he was right. This—whatever it was between us—was more than just a physical need. It was something deeper, something that deserved to be treated with the care and attention he was promising.
We were supposed to be heading to class, but with Mattheo Riddle standing this close, logic and responsibility seemed to melt away. His lips were on mine, hot and insistent, and I could barely think straight. His hand was firmly on my waist, pulling me closer as if he couldn't get enough, and I had to admit, I didn’t mind in the slightest.
In the back of my mind, I knew we were in a hallway, but everything else was a blur. All I could focus on was the way Mattheo’s lips moved against mine, the way his other hand slid up to cup my cheek, deepening the kiss.
Suddenly, the sound of footsteps echoed down the corridor. My eyes flew open, and Mattheo reacted instantly, pulling me into a nearby alcove and pressing a hand gently over my mouth. My heart raced, not from fear but from the thrill of almost being caught. I couldn’t help the mischievous smile that crept onto my lips as I peeked up at him.
His eyes were locked onto mine, and he had that signature smirk of his as we both listened to the footsteps drawing nearer. The Ravenclaw group passed by, completely oblivious to our presence. I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing at how close we had come to being caught.
As soon as they were out of sight, I grinned and grabbed his collar, yanking him back to me. “Where were we?” I asked, my voice playful as I pressed my lips to his once more. The taste of him was intoxicating, and I was already forgetting why we needed to stop.
His hands slid down my back, pulling me even closer, his lips moving hungrily against mine. “Right here,” he murmured between kisses. “Not going anywhere, princess.”
I laughed softly, feeling the thrill of the moment surge through me. “You’re going to get us both in trouble,” I teased, even as I kissed him deeper, not caring at all about the consequences.
“Worth it,” he breathed out, his lips trailing down to my collarbone, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. “You know, you could just skip class… stay here with me. I promise I’ll make it worth your while.”
“I definitely don’t want to go to class right now.”
“Who says we have to?” he murmured, his voice low and tempting as he pressed another kiss to the corner of my mouth.
I sighed dramatically, feigning frustration. “You’re such a bad influence, Riddle.”
“And you’re such a willing participant, Y/L/N,” he shot back with a smirk, pulling me back in for another kiss. This time, it was even more heated, as if the idea of sneaking around had only fueled the fire between us.
But just as things were getting even more intense, a familiar voice interrupted us. “Oh, don’t mind me. Continue.”
We both pulled away quickly, turning to see Theo standing there, looking entirely too amused for my liking.
Mattheo sighed, rolling his eyes before he spoke, “Theo, mate, you’re my best friend. Can’t you find something better to do than being a cockblock?”
Theo crossed his arms, smirking. “And you two were supposed to be finding the person behind the gossip column, not making out in an empty hallway.”
At Theo's words, realization hit me like a lightning bolt. The Daily Prophet letter! It was supposed to be today! I spun around to face him. “Theo, did the letter arrive yet?”
He shook his head. “Nope, nothing. You might’ve scared them off for good.”
I frowned, trying to think straight despite the lingering heat in my body from Mattheo’s touch. “That’s strange… they’ve been so consistent."
Mattheo’s hand was still on my waist, his thumb brushing gently over my skin, and despite my worry, I couldn’t help but feel a small thrill at his touch. I turned to him, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. “I should probably go so I won’t be late for class,” I said softly, though every part of me wanted to stay right here with him.
“You sure you don’t want to stay? I can think of a few more ways to spend the time.”
I laughed, giving him a quick peck on the lips. “Tempting, but I’ll save that for later.” With that, I pulled away from him, giving Theo a playful wave as I hurried off down the corridor.
As I walked away, I could hear Mattheo’s voice behind me, low and teasing. “You know, Theo, sometimes I think you take your job as a third wheel a little too seriously.”
Theo’s laughter echoed through the hallway as I turned the corner, already counting down the minutes until I could see Mattheo again.
I sat in class, staring blankly at the parchment in front of me, my quill lazily tracing random lines across the page. The absence of the Daily Gossip Letter today was unsettling, and I could feel the unease settling over the classroom like a heavy fog. Everyone else seemed to be thinking the same thing—why hadn’t it come today? The letter had become a constant, its arrival as predictable as the sunrise, yet today, there was nothing.
As I absentmindedly doodled on my notebook, my mind began to wander, trying to piece together why the letter had stopped.
But why would it stop?
I tried to focus, to pay attention to the professor’s words, but my thoughts kept wandering. The gossip letter had become a staple at Hogwarts, a daily dose of scandal that everyone had come to expect. So why would it just… stop?
Unless… unless the person behind it didn’t need it anymore.
The thought sent a shiver down my spine. I started to think about all the things that had been written about me in that damned letter. The gossip wasn’t just random; it was targeted, specific. Almost like someone had a personal reason.
I started recalling all the gossip that had been written about me. My so-called date with Prince Edward, which wasn’t even a real date because I had turned him down. But when I returned to school, the letter had detailed everything about it—except the rejection part, of course. That happened privately, away from prying eyes. So how did the letter know about the date in the first place? Who else was in Italy at the same time as me?
My heart began to race as I straightened in my seat, my hand shaking slightly as I wrote down the names of the only two people who could have possibly known. The first name felt wrong, implausible, but the second… my stomach twisted as I scrawled it down.
I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself. My thoughts raced back to another piece of gossip—the one about me supposedly flirting with a Durmstrang student during the Yule Ball. The truth was, I had been trying to get information about a certain dark artifact that night, and the conversation had been strictly business. Yet the letter painted a completely different picture.
Again, I scribbled down the name. My hand tightened around the quill as I recalled another instance—Time when I helped Adrian Pucey sneak into the restricted section of the library. It was late at night, and we were careful not to get caught. But the letter described it in perfect detail, down to the exact time we were there. Who else knew?
The quill in my hand quivered as I wrote down the final name. My breathing became shallow, and I could feel tears welling up in my eyes as all the clues finally came together, like pieces of a puzzle that I had been too blind to see. Every rumor, every piece of gossip, every little detail that had been written about me, led back to one person.
I circled the name angrily, feeling my heart break as I stared at the words on the page, the tears now spilling down my cheeks.
I didn’t care that the professor was calling my name, didn’t care about the shocked whispers that followed me as I bolted out of the classroom. All I could think about was finding him, confronting him. My feet carried me quickly down the corridors, my heart pounding in my chest as I headed toward the Great Hall. But when I got there, he wasn’t among the students milling about.
I clenched my fists, trying to think. Where would he be? Then it hit me—Quidditch practice. They had the last part of the day off.
Without another thought, I made my way to the Slytherin dorms. My mind was racing, anger and betrayal twisting in my chest as I reached his door. I didn’t hesitate as I knocked, the sound echoing in the empty corridor.
When the door opened, Mattheo’s surprised expression turned into a mischievous smirk as he leaned against the frame, eyes raking over me. “Y/N? What, you miss kissing me so much you had to skip class?” His tone was playful, teasing, and he stepped aside to let me in.
I ignored the flutter in my chest and walked past him into the room. The moment he saw my face, though, his smirk faded. He closed the door and turned to me, concern clouding his eyes. “Are you okay?” he asked, his voice softer now, as he moved closer. “Y/N, what’s wrong? Talk to me.”
I sat down on his bed, feeling the weight of his gaze on me. His words echoed in my mind, the ones he’d said before about how the person behind the gossip letter must want to get a reaction out of me. I looked up at him, a cold smile curling my lips. "Well, was it good?"
Mattheo frowned, confusion crossing his features. “What are we talking about now, princess?”
“The reaction you got out of me,” I said, and just like that, the smile on my face vanished, replaced by the full weight of my anger and hurt. “Was it everything you hoped for?”
His face went blank, the confusion deepening in his eyes. “Wait, Y/N—”
“Checkmate, Riddle,” I said, my voice trembling as I stood up, the anger and hurt finally spilling over.
"You were the only one who knew about Italy, about what happened there. You were the one who was with me at the Yule Ball. You were there when Adrian and I sneaked into the library." My voice grew louder with each accusation, tears burning in my eyes. "All of those details, every single one of them—it was you. You were the one writing the gossip letter, weren’t you?"
Tears blurred my vision as I continued, my voice shaking with emotion. “Was it fun for you? Watching me losing my mind, seeing how much it effected me? Was it a game, Mattheo? Did you enjoy it? You said the person doing this wanted a reaction—well, congratulations, you got it. You got everything you wanted. I trusted you… I thought you cared, but you were just playing me all along.”
“You’ve been playing me this whole time, haven’t you? Feeding me lies, watching as I fell for every trap you set. And for what? A laugh? A good story?”
“Y/N, that’s not—” he started, but I cut him off.
“Save it,” I spat out, my voice breaking under the weight of my emotions. “You’ve already won. I just wonder why you haven’t written your final story yet—it’s a good one. Especially the part where you—"
But before I could finish, he cut me off, his voice trembling with an emotion I hadn’t expected.
"What could I have done, Y/N? What could I have possibly done?" he began, his words tumbling out in a rush, raw and unfiltered. "I was there, yes, I was right there with you—through all of it. But do you know why? Do you know why I couldn’t stay away?"
I froze, his words piercing through my anger like a knife. He continued, his voice thick with desperation. "I’ve loved you all this time, from the first day I got off that stupid train, from the first moment I laid eyes on you. And I can’t remember a single day where I haven’t been in love with you.
He paused, his eyes locked on mine, pleading for understanding. "It wasn’t just some stupid crush, Y/N. It was an obsession, it was madness—but it was love. I loved you, and I still love you. I was desperate… Desperate to be near you, to be a part of your life, even if it meant doing something as twisted as this."
I stood frozen."You could have just said that. You should have just told me that."
"Yeah, right," he scoffed bitterly, shaking his head. "Fucking right, Y/N."
"What do you mean?" I asked, my voice wavering.
"You had a damn prince crying after you rejected him," Mattheo snapped, his frustration and jealousy spilling over. "A prince, Y/N! And here I am, the son of a psychopath, the last person anyone should ever trust, much less love. What was I supposed to say? ‘Oh, by the way, I’m in love with you, even though my father’s the Dark Lord and everyone expects me to be just like him’? Who the hell would ever want that?"
He paced the room, running a hand through his hair as he continued, his voice strained. "Every day, I watched you. I saw you with your friends, with guys who could give you everything—everything. And the worst part? The worst fucking part was knowing that no matter what I did, no matter how close I got, it would never be enough. Not for someone like you."
Tears welled up in my eyes again, but this time they weren’t from anger. "You don’t get it, Mattheo. None of that mattered to me. None of it. I didn’t care about titles or any of that. I just wanted someone who was real with me. Someone who saw me for who I am, not just as some piece in a game."
He stopped pacing and turned to me, his expression softening. "I did see you, Y/N. That’s why I did what I did. The letters… they were my way of being close to you, of being a part of your world. But I was so scared of losing you, of you finding out what I’d done, that I just kept digging myself deeper. And now… now I’ve lost you anyway."
His voice broke on the last word, and the sight of him standing there, so vulnerable, shattered the last of my defenses.
Just as I was about to respond, movement from the next bed caught my eye. I blinked, my heart skipping a beat when I saw Enzo sitting up, looking between Mattheo and me with wide, startled eyes, propped up on his elbows.
He Clearly had heard more than enough. "Oh, fuck," he muttered, a sheepish grin spreading across his face. "I’ve got this thing—relationship phobia. Can’t be around emotional confessions, they give me hives." [p.s that’s the same Enzo from Down bad pray for him]
He awkwardly shuffled out of the bed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Sorry, guys. Gonna get out of here real quick. Pretend I was never here, yeah?" With that, he practically bolted out of the room, leaving me staring after him in disbelief until the door clicked shut behind him.
This family is insane.
We both stood there in silence for a moment, the sudden interruption leaving us both a bit stunned. I didn’t know what to say, and it seemed like Mattheo didn’t either.
“Y/N,” he finally whispered, his voice cracking as he took a tentative step toward me. “Please… say something. Anything.”
“You hurt me, Mattheo,” I whispered, my voice trembling. “You lied to me, manipulated me."
“I know,” he replied, his voice thick with emotion. “I know I did, and I hate myself for it. But Y/N, please believe me when I say that I never meant to hurt you. I just… I didn’t know how else to keep you close.”
Tears welled up in my eyes again, and I wiped them away furiously, hating how vulnerable I felt in this moment. “Why didn’t you just tell me how you felt? Why did you have to go through all this?”
“I’m sorry,” he breathed, his voice so quiet, so broken, that it made my chest ache. “I’m so fucking sorry, Y/N. I never wanted to hurt you. I just… I didn’t know how else to be close to you. I didn’t know how to tell you that I loved you without feeling like I was going to lose you.”
I bit my lip, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill over. “But you didn’t have to do it like this, Mattheo. You didn’t have to lie to me, to manipulate me, just to be close. I would’ve—” My voice broke, and I had to take a deep breath to steady myself. “I would’ve loved you anyway."
Mattheo's face softened, his brow furrowing in confusion as he whispered, "You would?" His voice was barely audible, almost as if he didn’t believe the words that had just left his lips.
I couldn’t bring myself to answer right away. My heart was pounding, and I could feel the walls I had built around myself beginning to crumble. Without a word, I got up from the bed and walked toward him, each step feeling heavier than the last.
"Yeah," I finally said, my voice trembling as I stood in front of him. "Because it would’ve been easy, Mattheo."
His eyes searched mine, desperate and lost, as if he was trying to find the truth in my words.
"I’ve loved you," I began, my voice cracking, "from the moment I stepped off that stupid train, too love must have been in the air that day or something. But I couldn’t let myself admit it. Instead, I pushed you away, pretended I couldn’t stand you because I was terrified—terrified of how much I wanted you, how much I needed you." Tears spilled over, and I couldn’t stop them this time. They streamed down my face as I choked out the words I had been too afraid to say for so long. "I didn’t know how to deal with how much you consumed me, so I fought it. But it was always you, Mattheo. It was always you."
He moved closer, his hands gently cupping my face, wiping away my tears with his thumbs. His touch was soft, so different from the way he usually carried himself—like he was afraid I might break if he wasn’t careful.
“I didn’t know…” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. “I didn’t know you felt that way.”
“I did. I do,” I confessed, my voice barely above a whisper as I leaned into his touch. “I just didn’t want to admit how much you meant to me. How much you still mean to me.”
Mattheo’s forehead rested against mine, his breath warm on my skin as he held me close. “I’m sorry,” he murmured, his voice filled with a kind of raw vulnerability I’d never heard from him before. “I didn’t know how to show you what I felt without messing everything up. I was so afraid of losing you that I did the exact thing that could drive you away.”
I shook my head, trying to push away the flood of emotions that threatened to overwhelm me. “I know,” I whispered, my hands clutching the front of his shirt as if he was the only thing keeping me grounded. “I know now that the letters were more about admiring me than harming me. They only felt too much when another boy was involved, and… and I get it. I get that it was your twisted way of dealing with jealousy.”
He pulled back just enough to look into my eyes, his gaze intense but soft, as if he was seeing me for the first time. “You mean everything to me,” he said, his voice so quiet it was almost a breath. “I just didn’t know how to show it without screwing it up.”
“You don’t have to be perfect,” I told him, my voice shaky as I tried to make him understand. “You just have to be you. That’s all I ever wanted.”
Mattheo’s grip on me tightened, and he leaned in, his lips brushing against mine in the softest, most tentative kiss. It was like he was asking for permission, for forgiveness, and I gave it to him willingly, kissing him back with all the emotions I had kept bottled up for so long.
As the kiss deepened, I felt the last of my walls crumble, leaving me completely vulnerable in his arms. But for the first time, I wasn’t afraid. I knew that despite everything, this was where I was meant to be. And maybe, just maybe, we could find our way back to each other from here.
“I love you,” I whispered against his lips, my voice thick with tears and longing.
“I love you to—”
The door suddenly burst open, and Blaise walked in, his eyes widening as he took in the scene. He froze for a moment, his gaze darting between the two of us, and then a slow smirk spread across his face.
“Well, well, well,” he drawled, crossing his arms and leaning against the doorframe. “Isn’t this cozy? I was just coming to grab a book, but it looks like I walked into the middle of a romance novel. Should I start narrating? ‘And in that moment, their love ignited like a house elf’s poorly managed kitchen fire…’”
I felt my face flush, and I quickly stepped back from Mattheo, wiping at my eyes. “Blaise, could you just…not?” Mattheo said .
Blaise chuckled, completely unfazed by Mattheo’s irritation. “Oh, don’t mind me. I’ll just be over here, pretending I didn’t walk in on whatever _this_ is.” He waved his hand vaguely in our direction before sauntering over to the bookshelf.
I shot Mattheo a look, trying to stifle a laugh as Blaise exaggeratedly searched for his book, humming to himself like nothing unusual had happened.
Mattheo sighed, shaking his head as he muttered, “I’m killing you after this.”
“Nuh,” Blaise called out, pulling a book from the shelf and turning back to us with a grin. “You love me.”
“Debatable,” Mattheo shot back, but there was a hint of a smile on his lips.
Blaise winked at me before heading toward the door. “Carry on with your dramatic declarations of love. I’ll leave you two to…whatever this is.” With that, he slipped out of the room, leaving us alone once more.
As the door clicked shut, I couldn’t help but let out a small laugh, Mattheo looked down at me.
“Where were we?” he asked softly, pulling me back into his arms.
“I think you were about to tell me how much you love me,” I teased, my heart swelling with warmth.
“Right,” he whispered, his voice turning serious again as he leaned in to kiss me. “ Fuck yeah I love you. So much.”
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youraverageaemondsimp · 4 months ago
Text
A brother's betrayal. // Aemond Targeryen x Aegon's Wife!Reader
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Summary: You hear about your husband's injury and immediately rush over to visit him, you were devastated to see him in such a state, mere moments later, the cause of his injury steps in the room, his brother.
WARNINGS: dubious consent(?), choking, manhandling, rough sex, physical assault (nothing much, reader just slaps aemond), slight aegon x reader, season 2 spoilers, cunnilingus, unprotected p in v sex, TRAUMA, ANGST ANGST ANGST, dacryphilia, profanity, reader goes through the suffering of war, mentions of b&c but it happened to the reader, reader has a child with aemond and as well as aegon, mentions of childloss, manipulation, toxicity + not proofread
Could be read as part 2 of "A brother's duty." or alone!
WC: 3k
A/N: yeah idk why I wrote this, perhaps I wanted angst but yeah, like it's mentioned this can be read as a part 2 or stand alone! divider credits: @cafekitsune
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You rushed to Aegon's chambers the moment you had heard of his injury, footsteps echoing through the halls loudly, you had received the news that he had gotten burnt badly on one of his sides.
The door to his chamber was wide open, and you entered hastily inside, only to find the maesters and Alicent already in the room, you could tell by her demeanour that she was greatly troubled, you went over to her side and gasped the moment you looked at Aegon. “Is he dead?” You ask, voice trembling with sorrow and Alicent shakes her head, “No.” She swallows.
“My dear, you should probably leave, you cannot be watching this all whilst also grieving…” Alicent trails off, not wanting to mention your son. You shook your head, trying to stay strong.
You were watching the maesters for a few moments, when you felt the presence enter the room, It was Aemond.
Aemond walked in quietly and rested his hands on the sides of the bed, he was looming over Aegon’s body with a menacing stature
He turned and stared at you.
And you swore you saw a glint of satisfaction on his expression.
You felt like throwing up.
You snapped your head away from his direction when you heard Aegon huffing for air, sniffling when you looked at the raw wounds, tears glazed your eyes, looking at your husband in such a state.
He wasn't able to breathe properly, taking sharp breaths for he couldn't inhale, there was a pit forming in your stomach as you stared further, the maesters treated his wounds, you felt helpless.
Aemond still hasn't left the room yet, watching you sob for his brother, he furrowed his brows in annoyance.
“Somebody would need to rule in his stead.” Aemond speaks and you were in disbelief, his brother is hurt badly and those are the first words he speaks? He doesn't even ask the maesters if his brother is alive.
Alicent glares at him, eyeing him suspiciously.
“Your grace, I advise you all leave the chamber, we are about to begin the second treatment, and it isn't pleasant on the eyes.” The maester informs you and you nod slowly, feeling devastated after seeing your husband in such a horrible position.
Alicent walks out first in a hurry, probably going to Ser criston cole to inquire about what happened.
But you knew.
Aemond was definitely involved with this.
You walk out slowly, Aemond following you out right behind you, you tried your best to ignore him and walk away, but bubbling rage simmered inside you, knowing that he was at fault for this.
Your wrist was grabbed harshly by Aemond before he pulled you into a small corridor and slammed you against the wall. The rage you tried to hold in so badly bursted out in flames. You slapped Aemond across the face.
He was shocked.
The shock was quickly replaced by anger as he grabs your neck, holding you against the wall and tightens his grip around your neck, you feel yourself getting light headed from losing air.
“It was you- wasn't it?” You choke out angrily and Aemond smirks, closing his grip further. Your mind began to spin, you clawed at his arm trying to get him to release you, yet it's all in vain.
“Why are you upset?” He genuinely questions and loosens his grip slightly, you look at him dumbfounded, in disbelief that he doesn't feel the weight of this situation right now.
“How can I not be?! You've tried to kill your own brother! My Lord husband! Your King!” You yell at him, and he shakes his head, “It was a mistake- he happened to get caught in the crossfire—”
“Oh save the excuses, Aemond.” You scoff and he immediately releases his hold on your neck, making you cough as you try to inhale air, whilst gently massaging the area he grabbed.
“You and I, we both know that there is no chance that you would happen to mistakenly burn him, you plotted it, all for what?” You ask, staring right into his eye. “For his throne? For the power? What have you achieved through this? You've lost a dragon, your stupid decision will cost us a great loss to us.” You try to feed him common sense, yet the expression on his face remains unchanged.
“I did this for the years of humiliation I had endured, I deserve this as compensation, don't you think?” He whispers menacingly and you feel shivers up your spine. “You want him to compensate with his life? Have you lost it?” You argue.
“I've lost everything I wanted to him.” He twists up an answer, “He isn't worthy of a dragon, yet sunfyre was hatched to him, he isn't worthy of the power, yet it was given to him, he isn't worthy of being a king, yet he is, he isn't worthy of you, yet he has you.” Aemond grits his teeth in anger.
“Everything I wanted was given to him. All because he was the first born, is it not unfair?” He looks you in the eyes. You look down, closing your eyes; taking deep breaths. “But he doesn't deserve such a punishment.” You mumble.
Aemond grabs your shoulders gently, his touch now more forgiving than previously, he hooks his index finger under your jaw and tilts your head to face him. His thumb softly caresses your check. “I did this for us.” He sighs and you shake your head. “You had admitted yourself that you do not love Aegon, so why does it bother you so much?” He pries.
“Because I care for him as his wife, he may not have been the best husband, yet he was understanding.” You begin “In fact, he was the reason why we were both able to discover each other.” You finish.
Aemond is reminded of the past you three had shared, an utmost act of depravity and desperation, you had been shared by the brothers with a mutual agreement, he had to admit, his brother was indeed the reason why he was able to finally have you.
“And he mourned in your stead at the loss of our son, even though he knew it wasn't his.” You grit your teeth, clenching them as grief overwhelms you at the thought of your son, who had been a victim of murder. “While you were fucking your whore.” You recalled.
You were angry with Aemond for a lot of reasons, how could he betray his own family? He had been absent the night your son was murdered, and he hasn't shown any emotion since then. “You are aware that I cannot mourn publicly for our son.” He reasoned but you scoffed, “What about in private? Have you ever told me that you felt sorry? Have you ever tried to comfort me? It was Aegon who reached out to me when I was grieving.” You cry out, all the pain you were holding in your heart pouring out.
“He must've been a great person to you, but he hasn't to me.” Aemond counters back, and you let out a heavy sigh, not wanting to argue anymore, this war has taken a toll on you.
It felt like you were talking to a wall, pushing off his hand and turning to leave, but you are immediately stopped by Aemond blocking your escape with his arm.
“It might not look like it, but I too am grieving for the loss of our son.” He whispers, “I want to destroy the ones who caused this, and Aegon being in the rule will not let it happen easily, he is an idiot.” He tries justifying his actions, but you only glare at him.
“So you will be succeeding in his stead?” You ask and he nods, “Jaehaerys, my son, Aegon's heir, is still alive.” You furrow your brows, “Unless.. Don't tell me you're planning to take that child away from me too? For your greediness?” You question and he shakes his head “He is a child, the council will decide who will be the best candidate.” He replies.
“I can't believe you, Aemond, I barely recognize the man you've become.” You weep, Aemond pulls you close, wrapping his arms around your torso and pulling you into a hug, you do not hug him back.
“I sometimes wish that it was Jaehaerys who died instead of our son Rhaegar.” He mutters and you push away from the hug, looking at him with disgust. “You picked him, did you not?” Aemond hits the sore spot, reminding you of the incident in detail.
“They made me choose.” You breath heavily, body trembling as you recall the traumatic night, “And you chose to keep Jaehaerys.” He clenches his teeth in anger. “No.” You reply.
“What?” He questions.
“I chose Rhaegar to keep, but they were cruel and killed him instead.” Tears stream down your face, “I did not want to choose, I did not want to choose! I do not favour any of my sons above each other, I could barely escape with Jaehaerys in time.” You sniff, fists clenching as you recall the incident.
His eye widened at the revelation.
The main reason for him not mourning for Rhaegar was the anger he held towards you for choosing Jaehaerys over his son, yet he couldn't take it out on you as you were grieving too, but something about this provided him comfort.
He's sick in the head, he feels happy knowing you'd always choose him, his blood, his legacy.
He wipes your tears away, “I apologise, it was insensitive of me.” He wipes the tears off your cheek with the sleeve of his clothes, you couldn't help but stare at him.
He pulls you close, pressing a soft kiss to your lips, giving you all the affection you need to calm down, kissing your forehead, rubbing your back, holding your hand in reassurance. You found it odd.
You bask in his momentary comfort for a bit before you hear footsteps and push him away, running off in the other direction towards the nursery, where your son Jaehaerys resided.
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The council meeting ended with the conclusion that Aemond would be the prince regent.
Excited would be an understatement, he finally has the power he wanted.
They immediately begin to plan for the next step to take in the war.
The evening fell swiftly, Aegon had been treated to the best of the maesters ability, and you visited him on the eve, still not being able to stomach the sight. You had bought Jaehaerys in when the maesters had covered up all his wounds.
Jaehaerys rushed over to his father's side, “Mother, what has happened to father?” He asks you, wondering why his dad was in such a terrible state, “He got injured.” You reply, “Who hurt him?” He asks unknowingly, you bite your lip, and shake your head, “It is unknown, he got hurt in the war.” You tell him and he nods.
Aegon was taking in gasps of air, as he was not able to breathe normally, his eyes remained shut.
You and Jaehaerys both stayed in the chamber for a while, you watched in sorrow as Jaehaerys rambled on and on to his father about the things he did the time he was gone. You smiled when he leaned in close to whisper in his dad's ear, likely something he doesn't want you to know.
You wondered if Rhaegar would also be spending time with Aemond, if he wasn't—
You cut yourself off from the thoughts. Refusing to entertain them further, because you had to be strong.
“Jaehaerys, let's leave, your father probably needs rest, it's best not to bother him anymore.” You extend your hand out, Jaehaerys rushes over and grabs it with his tiny hand, before saying his goodbye to his father and leaving the chamber with you. You swore you heard him say your name but you brushed it off thinking that it was probably your mind.
The child's room was heavily guarded now, with more than four knights just looking after him. You felt safer but it did not undo the anxiety you still had.
You read Jaehaerys a bedtime story, to which he fell asleep quickly too, you kissed him on the forehead and left the room. You did not want to, but you had to.
Because the prince regent has called for you.
You rushed to his chambers.
“You called for me?” You waste no time, asking him upon entering and he nods, you felt his demeanour change completely, he seemed entirely different now. There was a vast contrast in his personality from the morning.
“I wanted to spend time with you.”
He could not be serious.
“Aemond, are you out of your mind-” He cuts you off, grabbing you by your hand and pulling you into a kiss. You wanted to resist, you wanted to push him away, but the minute his lips came in contact with yours, you melted.
It felt wrong.
It was wrong.
But something in the rhythm of his lips held a sweet melody that comforted you. You sighed heavily, your lips moving against his, reciprocating his feelings.
His hand snaked around your waist pulling you close against his body, flushing yours with his, he held your face tightly with his other hand, caressing your cheek while kissing you. Your hands gripped onto his shoulders for support.
He pulls away momentarily looking at you, searching for approval in your eyes but you pull him back into the kiss, indicating that you do want this.
He picks you up all of a sudden, you shriek in surprise grabbing tightly onto him to balance yourself, he takes you to his bed, laying you down and continuing to kiss you.
He pushes you further up the bed, you spread your legs to accommodate him as he continues to pepper your lips and cheeks with his kisses.
You flip around the position so that you're now on top, catching him by surprise, you climb onto his lap, straddling him before showering his neck with kisses. His hands busy themselves with undoing your dress, pulling at the strings that are holding the top part of your dress together.
You gasp for air, pulling from the kiss and looking him in the eye. He pushes a few stray strands away from your face, tucking them behind your ear, swiping his thumb across your bottom lip to collect the wetness that resided there.
“Gevie.” (beautiful) He whispers, staring at you in awe.
You hug him, laying on his chest, before finally breaking down, crying onto his shoulders, clinging onto his clothes. He caresses your head, comforting you.
He flips the position around again, now he's on top of you.
You lay there, staring at him with teary eyes, his tongue coming in contact with your cheek, licking up the droplet of tears, you felt butterflies in your gut. He kisses your eyes before he pulls back.
He sits back on his haunch, pushing your skirt up, bunching it up against your thighs before he pulls off the stockings you had on. Your thighs trembled when you felt his cool hand graze against them.
He threw them off the bed before he hooked his hands underneath your thigh, pulling you down as he went down underneath your skirt.
His lips caught your sensitive bud immediately, latching onto it for dear life. You grabbed his head out of instinct, hips lifting up slightly. You spread your legs wider, making it easier for him. His tongue swirled around your entrance before he swiped it up, latching onto your clit again.
He suckled onto it, the sensation drew you insane, you gasped for air, whining slightly as Aemond continued his ministrations.
You felt the familiar itchiness begin to bloom in your lower abdomen, you grind your face against his in desperation, wanting to feel the sweet feeling which you haven't felt for a while, and your wish comes true when your body convulses as the pleasure overtakes it.
You let out a loud moan of his name, making him groan in pleasure as well.
He lets you ride out your orgasm before he pulls apart, licking his lips, tasting your juices once again. He doesn't waste anymore time before undoing his breeches, pulling them halfway. His tip was leaking.
You waited in anticipation as Aemond positioned himself between your legs, pushing his cock into your cunt. You gripped the bedsheets when you felt the stretch. He hooked both of your legs onto his shoulders before he moved.
His movement showed desperation, his thrusts were hard and rough, he gripped your thighs harshly, leaving his nail bites onto your soft flesh. Your mind was spinning from the way he moved inside you, your body arched in pleasure.
He pushes your legs against your chest, hunching over as he moves faster, his tip kissed your sweet spot gently, He trembled moaning at the way your cunt clenched around his cock.
“Fuck fuck, you feel so fucking good.” He praises, his rhythm beginning falter, you blush at his words, clenching around him once again that drove him inside.
His cock penetrated your walls with utmost determination and precision to make you finish first before he did, your sweet spot was being poked over and over again, he understood that when you would gasp loudly.
The repeated disturbance caused a fire prickling in your stomach before you felt it suddenly go out, its smoke spreading all throughout your body, blinding you as you felt lightheaded.
“Oh fuck Aemond!” You threw your head back, hands clenching against the sheets tightly as the intense pleasure hit you hard.
He moaned loudly too, his cock spurted out his seed inside you, painting your walls with his essence. He collapsed on top of you immediately right after, his body giving up finally.
You both caught your breaths slowly, letting the feelings soak in, you felt a wet droplet on your shoulder trail down, and then another one, it began to continue like rain. You realised that Aemond was crying.
You held him closely, hugging him.
You did not say anything, letting him cry his feelings out of his body through the tears.
You both basked in the fleeting moment of comfort as you knew that nothing will ever go back to the way it was before.
Aemond knew too, he had become a monster in your eyes.
A monster you loved.
No,
A monster you still love.
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— !  ݈݇- thank you so much for reading! i hope you enjoyed it <3 comments and reblogs are appreciated greatly ♡
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