#and thats what im thinking with every other activity too- like i could work a lil. sketch something maybe
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since Rivals!Erik is such a beefcake, he would be bursting out the seams of the fc outfit. It’ll just be strips of fabric covering his more private areas 😭
😶
#snap chats#i shant speak .... anyway now i wanna play rivals but im enduring that thing where you have a scheduled event#so you dont do anythign yk what i mean. i have to go to a christmas party with my fam in about an hour#and an hour is a perfect amount of time for at least two games but im like#'dude i wont have time for that'#and thats what im thinking with every other activity too- like i could work a lil. sketch something maybe#but im like 'god i dont have time' motherfucker you have AT LEAST AN HOUR#so i will sit here and flip flop between twitter and tumblr like a true millenial. i hate myself.#'snap is it that deep' if i cant complete a thing in the time allotted i will die why do you think i never have wips vjerLKEAJ#if i cant finish it in one go i die. I Repeat i can play at least two rivals games so whats stopping me ......
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#personal#thinking about how the phrase treat others how you want to be treated is actually incredibly one way#unless damn near every person ive ever met wants to be treated like shit which i cant imagine is true#like idk i spent a lot of my time giving my energy to people. and ill never feel bad for putting love and kindness out into the world#but i gave some of these people everything i had. or not everything that would diminish me but everything i could spare for them at the time#i treated them attentively and considerately and tenderly and lovingly#and that kindness has not been extended back to me by most of these people#some of them have surely in their own 'love language' and im grateful for these people in my life#but most of the people ive treated with intentional care have actively and on purpose caused me a lot of emotional harm#which again. im working through and like karma will get them without me needing to be there or whatever while i do my own healing#but regardless i still think some of that shit should not have happened like it did#i dont understand how everyone can say to me treat others how youd like to be treated but not tell me the caveat#that they will not treat me the way i want to be treated even if i put in that effort for them/for our friendship or relationship or whatevr#like idk im a bitch for asking you to leave me alone when ive been vomiting for two days straight but you can straightup sexually misconduct#with my body and then when i write poetry about it and share my feelings instead of leaving and taking that information anywhere helpful#you get to decode youre traumatized actually and im still a bitch for bringing it up?#make it make sense#'treat others the way you want to be treated' so youd like it if i starved you and verbally insulted and gaslight and manipulated you? no?#then what the fuck is the point of you saying that to me???#idk im just fucking pissed rn that. idk what im pissed at. cause again i know im no contact with all of these people now and their#shitty justice will find its way to them. and i cant be mad at myself for saddling with the wrong people cause some of that was my choices#and some of it was blood i couldnt escape for a long time. and i said i dont want to regret or resent#putting love out to the world#but i am still angry that so much of me was given to the wrong people. that these people just chose to completely ignore#the level of respect and patience and kindness i showed them#idk dudes im just angry. 'treat others the way you want to be treated' fuck off thats some quiet manipulation bullshit to get me to be#nicer to you even as you abuse the self-worth outta me fuck off fuck you#i found it again. you cant bury it im too full of love to not love myself too but it hurts how hard they tried for so long#'treat others the way you want to be treated' how bout no. how bout i treat everyone with a base level of kindness#and when youve shown me that you will treat me the way i deserve to be treated then ill fucking play niceys back
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Thinking abt Sif Odile duo looping au again and I wanna be able to plot everything out more coherently but act 5 eternally looms overhead and boy I do not wanna look up
#rat rambles#stars posting#like I have a vague idea of some of the like themes I imagine being present late game but it doesnt change the fact that act 5 isnt very#duo looper au friendly especially in this case with most of the ideas I have#I rly want it to be both a breaking point for them as individuals and a breaking point for their relationship but idk how to go about that#fully taking the rest of the party into account especially since Im not even sure if I wanna give odile her own friendquests#like I Could but I also think it'd be fun for many reasons to not#and even if I Did itd be hard to justify having both be able to happen and go wrong in one loop#and theres not rly a good solution to that I think so my best bet is probably to just leave odile friendquestless#but Id rly like to still have odile quarrel with the rest of the party in a significant way#idk maybe it can be the scene where sif comes back to the lighthouse or smth?#like he comes back and odile just completely lashes out at him or smth and the others get rly upset with her#but then theres also the whole walk through the house that I have to figure out and Im also not set on how that should go#maybe it can be like reality almost splitting as they both try to use timecraft at the same time?#not sure how Id go about portraying that in story though since the rest of the party cant rly experience that I think#Im sure theres some way you could pull that off tho Im just too tired to have any good ideas atm#and then the biggest bastard comes in. mal moments.#like I cant just put them both there! that's not how that works!#and I dont wanna just leave them mostly vanilla thats boringgggg#but Id probably have to. alas.#afterwards is also a bit fuzzy but I have rhe general idea down#me and the bestie when we both made the same wish but dont know that and have both been falling into a spiral over it#(we dont even realize that the part of the wish that was the exact same was the core of the wish)#(we both just thought that we accidentally trapped the other with us in this hell)#(we also have been actively getting worse at communicating for months now so by the time the wishcraft stuff came up we were both deep in#the no feelings talky talk zone)#(we probably should have known smth was up when everyone started consistently thinking that we had a fight every loop)#(maybe we did but we just didnt want to admit they were right)#god I wish I was more confident with writing odile dialogue I wanna draw scenes from this au so bad#it doesnt help that I got too comfortable being into a media that had like 3 fans and now ppl might actually look at what I create
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I know you've already glossed over how simon would be with a partner and what kind of person he would need. but would you be able to go more in depth about what type of person you think he'd be interested in? what kind of person do you think would suit him best?
ghosts ideal type
who would this man be interested in?
first of all, i think ghost isn’t blinded by physical attraction. of course everyone has their preferences when it comes to height, weight, etcetc but i really dont think ghost cares. at least for 2009 ghost, hes a gentleman who doesn’t judge others. tall? short? fat? skinny? ugly? pretty? he doesn’t give a fuck. i think 2009 ghost is very attracted to kindness and compassion for others, leading him to have a soft spot. in the end i think he’d be very interested in someone who constantly is on the lookout for others and is very independent. in the comic hes always the one saving others and taking that responsibility, so he finds it nice when theres someone out there thats similar. hes the typa guy to fall for the girl next door whos constantly smiling, but knows how to playfully banter with him.
i highly doubt ghost would ever be attracted to someone in tf141 or working with him in the military… since to him work is work. there are also no females in the SAS (its true!) with only 2 passing pre selection in 2021, meaning ghost would have little exposure to working with female teammates. even if there is, it would be a huge slow burn romance imo.
also on the enemies to lovers thing—i dont see that happening. reboot ghost gives the vibes of a man who’d lowkey do that at first, but itd never happen. ghost is a simple man when it comes to relationships: i like you + you like me = mutual feelings. he wouldn’t get the whole ‘i kind of hate you because im pissed at you but also find you attractive’ trope. in fact he’d find it really annoying. he was already betrayed by his soldier teammates once, hes not gonna take it well if someone on his team suddenly gets aggressive towards him in the name of 'attraction'.
ghost isn’t shallow. but he would want his partner to be clean of drugs, have basic hygiene, and dress cutely from time to time. stuff like big ass and big boobs with an hourglass isn’t of his concern at all. in the comic he was in this bar full of prostitutes with his team, every soldier was enjoying their time with a girl—except ghost. he even told a prostitute to go fuck off when she got too touchy. so this can prove hes really not that hypersexual.
traits s/o needs
someone independent. they can cook, clean, live on their own for long periods of time. ghost is a soldier, meaning his schedule is different from most men. hes deployed for sometimes 6 months at a time, so his s/o needs to be content with living alone for long periods of time. the fact ghost is also deployed in active war zones and literal deserts while surviving on 5 hours of sleep, means he cant text or call daily either. this person can’t think that ghost is being distant or not loving them enough, its simply the life of a top tier SAS soldier. ghost doesn’t want this to happen either, but the person must be able to feel secure and independent without him… this also means knowing the possibility ghost could die at any point during his deployment.
someone who values acts of service. first of all, ghost has had a lot of people disappoint him in his life. general shepherd, his american teammates during the mission to destroy roba, and his dad. id argue his brother tommy too (used to be an addict), though its not disappointment its moreso “im not happy you’re on drugs”. ghost needs someone who does things for him that proves trustworthiness and loyalty. small things, like taking care of him when hes sick and preparing a warm meal when he comes back from the freezing outside. id imagine ghost does the same for his partner.
someone with good and strict morales. ghost is a good guy, and we know it. he prevented a girl from getting sexually assaulted, spent years guiding his drug addict brother into rehab, and will just punch about anyone who he thinks is pure evil. even after months of brainwashing and torture done by roba, when every american special forces soldier gave in, ghost didnt. he needs someone similar—morales they will never break … ever. even when tortured.
#call of duty#cod#cod mw2#ghost#ghost cod#simon ghost riley#call of duty x reader#simon riley x you#ghost x reader#ghost x you#ghost x y/n#simon riley#ghost mw2#ghost simon riley#ghost call of duty#simon ghost x reader#cod mw3#cod mwii#cod ghost#mw2#call of duty modern warfare#cod modern warfare#ghost headcanons#cod headcanons
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You already know who it is, back on my bullshit 👉👉 not here for paul this time (SHOCKING)
So , darry. Darrel Curtis. My boy my baby. I just have like ,, general things i want to know more about so bare with me bc hes my fav alongside paul ofc and i can ramble
1. When did his tail get permanently fucked up and how did he mess it up so badly?
2. Ik his powers get unstable when he gets like ,, real upset so besides the night he slapped Pony, are there any instances where he just got outta control ?
3. Is he afraid that his relationship with Paul isnt real bc of his mind manipulation bc baby knowing me if i had that power id be scared to mfing death
4. Goddammit im mentioning paul again sorry but ik darry calls paul pretty boy (heart hands i love that) but does paul call darry any pet name that just makes him SWOOOON
5. Has he ever gotten jumped post-book ?? I imagine that before him and paul fell out he had told him a bunch of things including weaknesses that socs used to their advantage ESP after paul “betrayed” them, and what better way to hurt paul holden then to hurt the person he loves more than life itself
Okay thats all for now b4 i go literally insane but i may be back bc i have questions abt other couples 😼😼😼
You’re so fucking real for the Darry enjoyment too I also adore him he’s such a guy. Both in canon and in the au, I need to kiss him on the forehead. DARRY YAP TIME (Crow will be so joyous)
Timewing got really excited about this one so a lot of the answers are his, I just added on afterward with my thoughts, so the first bullet point will be hers, and the second one is mine!!
When did his tail get permanently fucked up and how did he mess it up so badly?
- I assume he tried to crush it or break it violently enough that it needed to be amputated. One way of the latter reason probably would've been falling off the roof of the house back first. One way of the former reason is heading out to a field and trying to slam a hay bale on it. - I personally like to think he'd gone far enough to get his hands on a spare tire from their father's truck and,, crunch! It was the only way he could think of doing enough damage while getting away with it since the car had issues enough to need active little fixes and tweaks, including tire changes. He was around 17 or 18 during all of this, by the way. Unlike his ears, this isn't one his family knows was purposeful.
His powers get unstable when he gets like ,, real upset so besides the night he slapped Pony, are there any instances where he just got outta control?
- There are so many instances but it happens more so when he's stressed. There were a few situations where during tests during school he accidentally ended up making an entire class of 20+ students so anxious a few were sent home and a couple jocks had panic attacks. Another instance was (using the musical for this) when he and Soda were brought in to be asked abt Pony's whereabouts and he got so pissed off with the questioning that he also heightened the officer's anger and nearly got himself arrested. Also the rumble. I think that speaks for itself. - A couple other instances I can think of are after their parents died, when Dally got shot, and uh. The entirety of the duration that Pony was gone, though that was mostly him heightening his own distraught compared to anyone else. He probably does it every now and then at work too during rough work days, which makes for some interesting occurences.
Is he afraid that his relationship with Paul isn't real bc of his mind manipulation bc baby knowing me if I had that power I'd be scared to mfing death.
- Absolutely. He stresses abt it every second of every minute of every hour of every day. - A little fact that Darry doesn't know, though, is that after Paul's powers are presented he has a level of resistance to certain types of curse-related powers! He's not immune, per se, but Darry's manipulation, Soda's song, and Johnny's death sense are all a little lowered; this is because he's in the direct bloodline of the witch who cursed Tulsa. In the way that Johnny can't see Paul's death date (but can get flashes of it), Soda's siren song is easier for Paul to break himself out of and he can tolerate Darry's manipulation for a little longer before caving into it. Parry fans can rest easy knowing that Paul's love for Darry is 100% genuine. Unfortunately, Darry does not know that </3
Goddammit Im mentioning Paul again sorry but ik Darry calls Paul pretty boy (heart hands I love that) but does Paul call Darry any pet name that just makes him SWOOOON
- It's mostly the Latin nicknames that get him. He may not know what the hell Paul is saying but he's in love with it anyway. But he's also especially fond of being called the ever so typical "sugar" - Yeah it's just a bunch of Latin and then the usually sappy ones. Darling, Doll, etc. Paul hits him with “Optimum accidit mihi” ("The best thing to happen to me") once and Darry would actually fold if he knew it.
Has he ever gotten jumped post-book ?? I imagine that before he and Paul fell out he had told him a bunch of things including weaknesses that socs used to their advantage ESP after Paul “betrayed” them, and what better way to hurt Paul Holden than to hurt the person he loves more than life itself
- I imagine maybe once but there was also when he went hunting for Two's stolen feathers and was... scary. He's a scary dude, no one wants to mess with a fae that has that much muscle and is probably not afraid to bite you. - I also agree that,, yyyyeah, Darry is arguably one of the greasers to get jumped the least, including post-book. He works a lot too, so it's not like there are many open instances for him to walk around. Darry definitely told Paul any weaknesses that did exist, but I like to imagine Paul kept those real tight to his chest- He absolutely used them himself during their time hating each other, but could never get himself to tell the other socs; it was a level of trust he couldn't bring himself to break, especially since Darry had seen and heard his own share of things from Paul that he never spilled. The Socs also didn't know that Darry was what Paul valued the most; sure, Paul was very clearly into him, buuuut they make their own assumptions regarding his sexuality and how things go relating to it-
-I could definitely imagine a scenario where they attempt to sabotage Darry and Paul's relationship out of spite if they knew how dedicated Paul is.
#foster talks#the outsiders#the outsiders musical#foster answers#cursed tulsa#cursed tulsa au#darry x paul#darry curtis x paul holden#darry curtis#darrel curtis#we love him here#I love him chat#ALS OI LOVE AN EXCUSE TO POST A DOODLE TEEHEE#foster’s doodles
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[APPARENTLY PEOPLE HERE WANTED TO KNOW THE HUMAN AXIS LORE SO IM JUST GOING TO COPY MY TWITTER POST HERE…] BASIC GIST IS THAT THIS IS JUST A GENERAL HUMAN AU. MONSTERS AND HUMANS SWAPPED. WOWIE!
ANYWAYS READ MORE FOR AXIS
AXIS ORIGIN IS STILL A BIT FUZZY. HERE HE'S LIKE CHUJIN'S ADOPTED SON [GENDER NEUTRAL],, CATGIRLTRICKSTER ON TWITTER SUGGESTED CHUJIN JUST FINDING YOUNG AXIS IN A PIPE OR SOMETHING AND I THINK THATS REALLY FUNNY... THOUGH HIS ORIGINS WOULD BE VAGUE. IF ASKED HE'D SAY HE DOESN'T REMEMBER.
ALSO NOTE BEFORE I FORGET. AXIS WAS JUST BORN WITH ONE LEG. THERE IS NO LORE REASON TO WHY ITS MISSING, IT IS JUST THE WAY HE IS. CHUJIN MAKES HIM A ROBOTIC LEG SO HE CAN HAVE AN EASIER TIME.
SURE I COULD GIVE A FUCKED REASON AS TO WHY HE DOESNT HAVE IT BUT I DONT FEEL LIKE IT.
AXIS WOULD BE AN APPRENTICE UNDER CHUJIN SIMILAR TO MARTLET [I NEEDA DRAW MARTLET EVENTUALLY] PLUS IN GAME THERE'S FLAVOR TEXT ABOUT HIM FLIPPING THROUGH THE ROYAL GUARD HANDBOOK IN HIS MIND. HONESTLY. MARTLET AND AXIS BEING FRIENDS THROUGH SHARING THE SAME INTEREST IS SILLY...
HE'D WANT TO TRAIN HIMSELF TO BECOME A ROYAL GUARD OR AT LEAST A PROTECTOR TO PAYBACK CHUJIN FOR TAKING HIM IN. HE'S GOING TO PROTECT HIS FATHER AND HUMANKIND. IT'S HIS BIGGEST GOAL IN LIFE.
STEAMWORKS STILL EXISTS. ITS JUST CHUJIN HADNT BUILT THE AXIS MODELS IN THIS AU BECAUSE. YOU KNOW.
MAYBE HE SAW POTENTIAL IN HUMAN AXIS, SEEING HOW DETERMINED HE IS TO GROW STRONGER AND PROTECT PEOPLE. CHUJIN WOULD WANT HIM TO HONE HIS SKILLS TO BECOME SOMETHING... BIG.
IN A WAY. AXIS WAS A PEEK INTO WHAT HUMANS COULD BECOME AND WHAT THAT COULD DO FOR HUMAN SOCIETY UNDERGROUND.
MEANWHILE AXIS IS ENAMORED BY STEAMWORKS AND JUST CHUJIN'S WORK IN GENERAL. HE REALLY ADMIRES ROBOTS, HE THINKS ABOUT WHAT ITS LIKE IF HE HAD ROBOTIC MODIFICATIONS.
AND LESS LORE RELEVANT BUT HE ALSO HAS CONNECTIONS TO KANAKO TOO! THEY ARE THE SIBLINGS EVER. THOUGH IVE BEEN WONDERING HOW CEROBA NOT KNOWING AXIS IN STEAMWORKS WOULD WORK. IT'D BE KINDA WEIRD FOR CHUJIN TO KEEP A WHOLE ASS CHILD SECRET FROM HER.
THEYVE PROBABLY SEEN EACH OTHER AND NEVER HAD MUCH SIGNIFICANT
INTERACTIONS FOR THEM TO FULLY REMEMBER EACH OTHER. AXIS SPENDS A MAJORITY OF HIS TIME AT STEAMWORKS OR DOING ROYAL GUARD SHIT, AND WHEN HES NOT DOING THAT HES PROBABLY PLAYING WITH KANAKO [WHEN CEROBA ISNT AROUND]
AND WELL. WE HAD TO GET TO THIS PART EVENTUALLY. ONE DAY A MONSTER MAKES ITS WAY INTO THE UNDERGROUND AND STARTED KILLING PEOPLE. DALV [WHO I ALSO NEED TO DRAW] GOT CAUGHT UP IN THE FRAY WHILE PLAYING WITH KANAKO [AND AXIS TOO]. UPON SEEING HIS FRIENDS GET HURT. SOMETHING CLICKS.
AXIS HAD TRAINED UP TO THIS POINT. THIS WAS HIS MOMENT. HE HAD TO SAVE THE PEOPLE FROM THE THREAT IN FRONT OF THEM. INSTINCTS KICK IN AND HE GOES IN TO FIGHT THE MONSTER WHILE DALV TAKES KANAKO TO SAFETY.
THIS MONSTER WAS TOUGH. HE WAS ALMOST KILLED. BUT HE HAD TO PERSEVERE.
SOMETHING JUST ACTIVATED IN HIS SOUL.
HE FELT A SURGE OF POWER. THE ONLY THING HE KNEW IN THAT MOMENT WAS TO.
GET. RID. OF. THE. THREAT.
IN FRONT OF HIM WAS JUST. A HEADLESS BODY THAT SLOWLY FADED INTO DUST.
THAT... HE DIDNT MEAN TO GO THAT FAR.
SIMILAR TO CLOVER IN GENOCIDE, AXIS HAD RAPIDLY LEVELED UP AND SHOT A POWERFUL ATTACK AT THE MONSTER IN RESPONSE TO ALMOST DYING. HE NEEDED TO KEEP GOING NO MATTER WHAT.
STILL. THE CONSEQUENCES OF HIS ACTIONS LAID HEAVY ON HIM.
HE HAD KILLED A LIVING, BREATHING THING.
SOON AFTER CHUJIN WALKED IN ON THE SCENE COMPLETELY HORRIFIED. AXIS, ASHAMED OF WHAT HE HAD DONE RAN TOWARD STEAMWORKS TO ISOLATE HIMSELF, SIMILAR TO DALV.
SURE, HE HAD SAVED PEOPLE FROM THAT MONSTER BUT DID HE HAVE TO BE SO GRUESOME?
CHUJIN RAN AFTER HIM, TRYING TO GET HIM BACK
CHUJIN FINDS HIM AT STEAMWORKS, WALLOWING IN JUST. EVERY EMOTION.
HE TRIES TO COMFORT HIM THOUGH AXIS IS STILL INSISTENT ON NOT GOING OUT.
THE TWO REACHED THE COMPROMISE THAT: AXIS WOULD GUARD AND PROTECT STEAMWORKS AND THAT CHUJIN WOULD CHECK UP ON HIM EVERY NOW AND THEN.
SO THATS WHAT HE DID. HE STAYED AT STEAMWORKS, WATCHING OVER THE PLACE AND ITS ROBOTS FOR….. AGES.
EVENTUALLY CHUJIN'S CHECK UPS GET MORE SPARSE UNTIL JUST. NOTHING.
AXIS NOTICES TOO THAT LESS AND LESS SCIENTISTS ARE PRESENT AT STEAMWORKS. UNTIL THERE IS NO ONE THERE.
WHEN ASKED IF HE WAS GOING TO LEAVE
TOO HE SAID
"NO. MY FATHER AND I HAD REACHED THE AGREEMENT THAT I WOULD STAY AND PATROL THIS AREA, AND THAT I WILL DO." THERE WAS NO CONVINCING HIM TO LEAVE. SO THE OTHERS RELUCTANTLY LEFT HIM BE.
DAY BY DAY HE WATCHES STEAMWORKS FLOOD AND DECAY. WHILE HE STAYS THERE TRYING TO KEEP UP THE AGREEMENT BETWEEN HIS FATHER AND HIMSELF.
NO ONE HAD TOLD HIM.
ONE DAY THOUGH HE FINDS THAT STEAMWORKS SUDDENLY ACTIVATES RIGHT BEFORE SEEING A MONSTER ONCE AGAIN.
OH HE REMEMBERS THE PAST WELL. IN THIS AU IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO GET HIS MEMORY ERASED.
WHILE THE EVENTS PLAY OUT MOSTLY THE SAME COMPARED TO NORMAL UTY.
AXIS SEEMS MORE HESITANT THAN USUAL. AND PROBABLY MONOLOGUING A LITTLE SIMILAR TO WHAT DALV DOES
BEING A HUMAN. HE POSES LESS OF A THREAT ON HIS OWN. HOWEVER. MY GUY SETS UP HOME ALONE TYPE TRAPS N SHIT TO TRY AND CATCH CLOVER INSTEAD [PART OF HIS ROYAL GUARD TRAINING!!.
ONLY RESORTING TO USING "ROBOTIC MODIFICATIONS" HE HAD FOUND WHEN CLOVER REALLY [ticks] HIM OFF.
AND YES. HE STILL GETS A ROBOT SPOUSE IF A PACIFIST PLAYTHROUGH HAPPENS. HUMAN AXIS IS OBJECTUM. ITS REAL.
SO YEAH THAT IS ALL THE THINGS I THINK.
HOLY SHIT THIS THREAD IS LONG. FEW PEOPLE WILL READ THIS I THINK BUT I STILL WANTED TO GET STUPID AU THOUGHTS OUT. UH. YEAH HOPE THAT IS GOOD OR SMTH.. FEEL FREE TO ASK QUESTIONS 🥺
#undertale yellow#undertale yellow spoilera#uty#axis#axis 014#axis undertale yellow#axis uty#gijinka#Zed’s art
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finished saiki k and i am not coping well
yeahh i get why they said theres no development until the last 2 episodes. because i have thoughts. more than i had for season 2 or season 1.
@peapodsinspace ing because this isnt from discord and i was freaking out with you real time when i was watching loll
cannot believe this is only about three episodes. how is this just three???? im just going to go in chronological order and hope for the best and barely proofread loll
the future talks. ohhh i am ill about the future talks. saiki kusuo has more pressing matters than his future and it kills me every time. because he cant focus on himsef- there is an active volcano that he has always been rewinding time for. he cannot have the time to think about university or a future career until this is all over, which is so unlike me (a normal teenager) that it makes me ill because this is what a normal teenager should be thinking about, not the fucking country that you have to save by yourself. and at least i was so happy that they were crowding around kusuos desk until they started talking about the very future that he has to save, and then i was even happier to hear that kuboyasu and hairo want to become teachers because those types of characters always kill me (despite the fact that the anime also made fun on the fact that it is a trope too) and they are both really good picks from the gang to actually become them. i also enjoyed the quiz game they did to guess kusuos college- teruhashi was the only one to get a ‘hm good guess’ out of kusuo, and his chosen places are literally ‘economics’ ‘literature’ ‘literature’ and the fact that everyone said “thats so normal”in distaste implies that they believe that kusuo could do better. and then THIS.
and the fact kusuo thinks “maybe this could go on forever…” with a smile on his face???? like my dude you are wayy too attached to them noww..
ok so it seems i might even just. be doing a paragraph per episode. now.
the robot?? i agree with what i said my first watch: WHY IS THE SAIKI FAMILY SO DEPENDANT ON GENERATIVE AI AND ROBOTS. i wasnt sure which one it would do- if it would fool all his friends or if it would be too suspicious for them. but i was dead wrong- it says ‘yare yare’ too many times and it is obviously saiki kusuo in the flesh (get it?). i was growing more concerned (and out of breath from laughing) at all the shenanigans that happened along with how kusuo attempted to get rid of it, showing a bit more of his battle iq and intelligence along with his relationships with the other psychics, through his quick strategizing along with utilising his abilities to help in specific situations, along with the relationships he has cumulated with them in order to get them to trust him and follow his word when serious times arise. not only that, but kusuke gets additional information about all of that along with us the audience because he is also a part of the audience (my brain hurts from some of this stuff).
then for the battle. i am illllllll. so. for many many episodes, we have watched kusuo try and make plans to avoid his friends in all sorts of situations. but this bit? its golden. he finds a disadvantage from not knowing what toritsuka has been doing all week, and that temporarily weakens him until he comes up with a new plan on the given information he knows and has pieced together himself, and then used it to get his body back. then not only that, he begins to fight without his limiter. and we know its hard even with the limiter!! we watched him struggle to throw balls, and then practice to ensure that he could control his strength. amazing already, but then he begins to turn a bad situation into something favourable especially with toritsuka in the mix. because both saiki brothers are smart af. even if toritsuka isnt of use, kusuke reuses him as a hostage and then when that doesnt work, himself and the limiter (all things important to kusuo). kusuo is able to put together that the bomb was fake because kusuke spoke for too long and he remembered aiuras word and trusts her power.
and then the battle plan is so smart?? kusuo is able to use his disadvantages as advantages (teleportation doesnt need the 3 minute cooldown), and then purposefully drained his strength to be able to pick up the limiter and put it back into his head without breaking it. he could read toritsukas mind and realised that he didnt actually hate kusuo (i found how this was shown as really cool too? instead of the background it was soft shapes and colours implying friendliness as it showed both of them). he made enough of a friendship with toritsuka to get him not to hate him even after being brainwashed. kusuo dragged out the battle to try and gauge what the cat tank could do. AND HES SEVENTEEN. what shocked me further was the fact that he took out the limiter. which he thought would reveal his powers to the world. sure its an asshole thing of kusuke to say/do to kusuo but he at least disabled it a long time ago. but im more focused on kusuo. he took it out. he took it out. thats HUGE. he really thought he would be letting go of normalcy and never be able to go to school without being worshipped. and he did it on his own terms. i was so happy to see how he was smiling and happy thinking about his friends too.. like kusuo was happy with the time he spent with them as a normal kid. but then he was so ready to blast them with full power after both of their comments lolll. and i also found it interesting how kusuke took off his telepathy blocker when explaining why he disabled it so that his brother could know he was telling the truth. and the fact that they moved past the fact that kusuke made a limiter that completely erases kusuos powers?!??!?! and i was confused when toritsuka and kusuo moved past it so easily but. thank fuck they revisited that tidbit???? what made me sadder was the fact that kusuo wanted it so badly, and yet couldnt. because of the volcano. it was good foreshadowing when kusuo thought ‘move forwards.. theyre right. i should clean this up quickly’ in the first part of the episode and then to have this too.. the emotional turmoil is too much. on one hand he could get rid of powers he hates and yet he still has to save the world which he has been putting on hold because he needs more power. like yeah please kill me now, especially that last interaction between toritsuka and kusuo. like yeah hes fake mad at toritsuka at first but then he has to give his genuine thanks because there was no way kusuo would have won if it was just himself, as toritsuka was a key part of the battle from his new powers to his status as a hostage to the fact he broke past the brainwashing.
and when they finally start planning that trip (callback to the first segment of episode one!!) and they decide upon the place where an active volcano has tried to blow up for four years. absolute madlads. kusuo diverted them at first but its a comedy anime too- ofc they are going to oshimai.
and everyone asking why he cant go is hillarious too.. “what plans do you have?” “im sure its nothing important!” ‘im saving the world?!’ yeahhh he has to go, because he cares. he doesnt want them to cancel what they think is their last fun time together before third year. its not because his mom forced him. its because he loves them. the cumulation of four years with these losers has made kusuo soft for them.
when they actually get to oshimai, i would have loved to watch their shenanigans. im sure they are chaos incarnate while on a play date with each other, but i really liked how the anime showed the tension that kusuo had. even as the rest of them were having lighthearted conversations, there was always a pit in my stomach as kusuo continued to refer to the mountain and was generally downcast while the group did all of those activities i would have previously have laughed at if it was not for the huge threat right there and despite the fact that kusuo looks the same as always (silent, in the background, neutral face) i felt nervous because he had said so just barely a minute ago and hadnt mentioned again. its shown through the way he allowed teruhashi to do as she pleased, how he would look at the mountain constantly, not say anything mentally to the audience.. it was offputting and really set the vibes. his face reflected in the window, with owari yama right there too? perfect way to end the segment.
i found it clever how saiki used a previous part to help him: the robot. he now knows that nobody suspects anything if he just says ‘yare yare’ and he now uses this with his hypnosis (seen in many episodes, such as s1 ep 24) to mesh together a perfect stand in (according to his friends OOF). and then he uses the clones (from s2 ep22) to help with the eruption (s2 ep13). not only that, his plan is pretty good. he has already used toritsuka as a stand in (when kusuo turned kaido and nendo into stone) and then aiura has already helped him with a previous eruption which he had to turn back time on. it was also a callback to kusuo in the previous episode: no way kusuo would have asked kusuke for help on how to solve the volcano problem if they had not cleared some things up after the fight, and no way would he have if there was no power canceller, and no way if the limiter being pulled would still tell the world about his powers. this is a big climax towards things that the plot has been working towards, and it is a mix of everything: many specific instances, his training, previous lore, character development, his friends and family, kusuos priorities, his emotional stances. they all played some sort of part in his plan to enable time to move forwards.
i was concerned to see him beat up (because looookkk hes just two years older than mee and also pretty oppp) but i was so fuckin pumped that time was moving forwards and he was also pretty happy, given the smile. and the joy immediately left. because everyone showed up, and then to show that alternate universe where things were almost the same but slightly different?? and the fact that kusuo literally told all of them about his powers because he knew he could go back in time and erase all of that? its killing me because he did that because he knew he could experiment for a reaction and then erase it as if nothing actually happened. and it really seems like theres no getting out of it right. his friends saw him, they see the clones, they see toritsuka faking as kusuo, they see the real kusuo holding the ground and preventing the eruption. theres no lying to get out of it. but the same as i thought from the shipwrecked episodes, of course saiki kusuo gets out of it. kaido realises it too and he just wants the truth because he trusts kusuo so much. its been there since the beginning, how much kaido cares about saiki and wants him to be happy because kusuo has made kaido happy, and how much kaido values their friendship. he has always wanted kusuo to remain safe and happy and to be friends with each other.. we see how the rest of them just want kusuo to tell the truth, because they will love him no matter what. and it was shown through the alternate timeline, too, how they dont care about the powers, even if they dont understand, that they know kusuo and know that he has their best interests in mind because he is their friend. and somehow its nendo who is the reasonable one, we have seen him be kind and understanding towards both kusuo and others at so many instances but it is this one that touches kusuo because nendo has always been there for him, throughout all sorts of situations. sure he is dumb, but nendos strength is not athletics. it is his kindness.
then the fact that everyone agrees with him.. theres no way this is a comedy anime. this is a slice-of-life coming-of-age angst/horror anime which has comic relief. it was shown through the alternate timeline, too, how they dont care about kusuos powers, even if they dont understand, that they know kusuo and know that he has their best interests in mind because he is their friend. and he knows that even if it is a different timeline, that they would still remain the same in the stance. so he speaks. with his mouth. its huge!! his eyes are shiny because this is absolute confirmation that they would love him even if they knew that about him, because he has given them the same treatment- he has seen a huge part of them that they dont share, and he still loves them, so the opposite is also true. ..but he cant share it yet, not until his powers are gone of course. and it makes sense, of course. if i was one of his friends, i would prefer learning about that after his powers are gone- and this is a decision he is sure about. kusuos powers have caused him so much suffering. while he has many typical teenager traits, he is all in all, incredibly different due to his enlarged responsibilities over himself and the world. sure, his powers have helped him in many situations, but for kusuo, the bad outweigh the good and this has been his ultimate goal for a very long time. while removing his powers will not get rid of the weirdness surrounding him, it will get rid of a lot of the pain and stress. and i was so fucking excited when hairo said that kusuo called everyone over- because we the audience know what will be happening. and it would definitely be for the best, as kusuo really wants to apologise for many of the things that happened because of his powers.
and then the fucking window.
then this is why im very happy for the watch order to be posted. because this cliffhanger is too much without reawakened episode 6.
i find it so funny that while kusuo has lost his powers, that he still has the ability to break the fourth wall. when asked if his delusions are the same as kaido in middle schooler syndrome, he has to reply with an “absolutely not”. i love how he is feeling the effects of losing his powers. he has relied on his powers as another limb his entire life, and they are suddenly gone. even if they are overall bad, he still used them daily and isnt used to life without it because he was forced to live with it previously, meaning that he would find some use through the disadvantages. i also really liked how while kusuo could very blatantly feel the loss, he could also appreciate the beauties of normal life. actually be able to see his friends rather than just a skeleton, probably have a peaceful sleep, any of those powers he couldnt turn off have finally done so and he has a lot less weight as a result. it is really interesting to watch him try and get out of situations he would have previously avoided using his powers, as he has to rely on his own intuition and chance rather than himself and his abilities.
but it is an anime, and god hates him, so kusuo is stuck with teruhashi on their project. he sees the disadvantages everywhere- things that normal people are used to but he is not, and it seems like good representation for disability- having something and then suddenly having it gone, so you are only left with routines that are no longer possible because you are missing a key component. and not only that, there are hinders towards kusuos journey.
he gets a fucking bookshelf toppled over onto him. huhhhhhh???? would you really go so far as to kill a kid for accidentally becoming partners with a girl for one school project?? and i was also confused until i saw nendo- in all his glory. seriously, this guy is insanely good at protecting people without a single thought beforehand (he has to get it from his dad right). and not only that, we watch toritsuka and kuboyasu against the bullies- two people insanely good at beating people up. this is a great place to show some character development- nendo gives a speech to kusuo about how even the strongest can need protecting, and it is shown with how nendo instinctively went to protect him from the bookcase and toritsuka/kuboyasu went to beat up the ones who caused it.. finally kusuo himself can get protected by his friends. because he isnt used to it in the slightest. he desperately wanted to get rid of the powers without fully realising how much he relied on them for daily life. even in dangerous situations he would subconsciously rely on powers he doesnt have anymore, and he even realises it and doubts his decision. but nendo comes in and saves it and i find that very precious and important to kusuo to realise that he doesnt always have to be the overpowered one because there are people around him who still care regardless.
but it doesnt last. he cannot even get used to having no powers because they come back only two days later. the way it was presented was pretty cool, too, with how kusuos hand made an indent into the wall from where he slammed it, to the thought bubble from kusuke. and i also thought the way the dawning horror was shown was pretty cool. the purple and blue spirals towards a terrified kusuo without his limiters or glasses, at night, while kusuke continues talking and says that kusuo has evolved past being human in order to control his powers? yeah terrifying, i felt the horror in me too. because how long had he been evolving for? if hed gotten rid of the powers faster, would it have worked? if he hadnt spent so long on the volcano, could he be normal? was he ever actually normal? was it only recently since his body had changed to adapt? because with his body, kusuo relies on his powers. it could be compared to another heart, or a limb. his body needs powers because that is what they are used to. eyes that see through skin, a brain that can hear thoughts, muscles that are used to carrying boulders.. the list goes on and it shows that he has no choice but to use powers, as his mind has always been on fixing problems using parts of him that he has always had, his own biology has been on that. yeah psychological horror much.
the fact that it doesnt work. being told to live normally and peacefully without thinking about his powers doesnt work. because kusuo is far too used to them, he doesnt even think before using them for the little things in daily life such as opening the door or pushing in his seat. its like a papercut on your finger and only then do you realise how much you use that finger all the time- he doesnt realise it until its too late. and then he continues to remain ignorant until it actually happens, such as clairvoyance and new (useless) powers forming. he is already too used to it that he uses them without realising, because that was his normal. kusuo can also realise this with his dawning terror at each thing that happens with his power, with the foreboding patterns with dark colours and his horrified face. he is trying so hard to deny it because even if there are good things that come with his powers, ultimately, they cause him suffering. but it doesnt even fucking work.
its really sad to see him accidentally use powers, as they come back swiftly. kusuo is trying so hard to deny his symptoms but there is really no use: the illness is back. he teleported home, used clairvoyance, talked using telepathy, went invisible, used psycokinesis, saw through someone.. theres too many to deny that his powers are back. but kusuke asks valid questions: did anything good happen without them? and the answer is kusuo thinking about the bookshelf incident. because there are both good and bad things from it, he had to get protected and was weakened by the fact he couldnt see it coming, but it was good to know that so many people are willing to protect him. but then theres a fucking meteor. its also a manipulative thing for kusuke to do, asking that question and then thrusting a natural disaster upon his brother going through an existential crisis. because kusuo has a choice to make. he could try and suppress the powers even further and live a normal life until the end and let kusuke deal with it as that is the path that he chose. or kusuo could accept that the powers are a part of him and that people will still love him regardless, and make the choice to save the world and possibly never live normally again. and its a shitty situation all around. a seventeen year old should not have to make such a choice.
and yet he has to. because kusuo can hear his friends pleading for help, their fear, their reactions, confusion. kusuo knows he cannot have his father do something of this scale, or let his brother do something like that to their dad. he cant let the meteor hit earth because everyone he loves is there. kusuo was always one to complain verbally(mentally) about shit he gets wrapped up in, but from the context clues and his actions throughout the series, he has shown just how much he cares and tries to help even with how much he drags his feet and complains and insults. because all kusuo wants is for his friends to be happy, and to live normally. but those two things cannot coexist, at least not for long. and then he smiled. he chooses their happiness, because that is the kind of person kusuo is. he has said that he is a psychic in so many situations and for so many reasons, but at the start and end of the series, it is the same ten words.
“so my life of peace is over, but i feel that is not so bad after all.. perhaps i like to deal with hassles after all. yare yare. my name is saiki kusuo. and i am a psychic.”
#the disaster of psi kusuo saiki#saiki kusou no psi nan#saiki no psi nan#the disastrous life of saiki k#saiki kusuo#kusuo saiki#saiki#psychic kusuo#saiki k#saiki kusuo no psi nan#my brain cannot comprehend masterpieces#but i tried#i dumped this over 3 hours folks#i am in love if you cant tell#saiki kusuo deserves so many coffee jelly guys#my brain is mush
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Went to France instead of making Soldier Ships. And then Forgor. Apologies.
Ranking Tf2 Ships Part 2: Soldier
Batting Helmet
See the first list lmao
It's hilarious, basically.
Sollycest
I think their combined power would destroy the planet. So.
Objectively funny also, however
Fireworks
Im like 90% sure thats the ship name but i havent touched my shipping website in months soooooo
Same genre as batting helmet, but objectively BETTER, because they actively meet each others' crackpot level. And there's minimal choking.
Seriously check out the tag on ao3 some absolutely BRILLIANT fics on there shout out to uhhh i think they're called Hanktalkin and they've written the best ones
Realistically would destroy everything around them. I'm beginning to think that would just happen with most Solly ships.
Boots n Bombs
SHOUT OUT TO BOOTS N BOMBS WEIRDLY UNDERATED DESPITE BEING THE FOURTH MOST POPULAR SHIP ON AO3. Crazy gap between bloody suit (1000+) and them (like around 450).
EMESIS BLUE. URGH. THEY KILL ME.
WAR! UPDATE. URGH. THEY CONTINUE TO KILL ME.
CUT VOICELINES. URGH. THEY SUCEEDED IN KILLING ME. I AM DEAD.
Lovely lovely dynamic, platonic or otherwise. At least Besties in every universe, team colours be damned.
And the YURI. ARGH I saw someone describe WAR! solly x demo as yuri coded bc of their "unbearably sapphic levels of miscommunication" which HAHA YEAH but I mostly mean the genderbendy art it's Exquisite.
Bonus points for when they're polying up they cule with Zhanna also. I had to explain the word polycule to a classmate the other day isn't that wild. Anyways the three of them match each others' freaks.
Cold War
When you're so determined for this idiot to not fuck your sister you fuck him instead lmao
Pretty fun in theory, in practice I think they'd both hate it.
Um shout out to that one fic i read once where soldier ruptured his throat giving heavy head that was. Something. I mean that in a nice if midly bemused way btw.
Helmet Party
Save me helmet party etc etc
The art on here for them is adorable genuinely the softest i see solly portrayed in fanworks is with engie
In canon Solly seems to respect Engie the most? E.g. Expiration date: stops choking out scout when asked to by Engie, takes Engie's "teleport bread if u want" comment as an ORDER, even the whole QUESTION whatsurquestionsoljer exchange felt very I ASK OF YOU, COMMANDING OFFICER!! What having another True American on the team does to a mf i guess. Scout isnt a True American he's french.
I mean i still like boots n bombs more lol but helmet party fans i see u and i love u especially when u make it yuri.
Fruit Scones
Look up the story behind the ship name guys its great
As a ship to me it's heavymedic but without everything that makes heavymedic the Ship Of All Time
Solly's pocket medic cosmetic is cute tho
Uhhh as long as soldier never made the germany connection i think it could work? Like he'd let medic do crazy shit to him and medic would giggle and kick his feet over it. Then again there's no way medic wasnt doing fucked up shit to n*zis during ww2 so ykw it would probably work out regardless yippeee
OH YEAH THE NICKNAMES whenever i play medic and hear a cmere sweetheart/pumpkin/sally/cupcake I lose all control of myself and suddenly become a pocket medic teehee.
American Aviators
Its a sniper ship and not sb so I automatically like it
Tragically not that compatible. Sniper would find soldier too loud and soldier would find sniper too unamerican in his shooting things from far away tactics.
They have potential to be good friends tho i think. I've always seen Sniper as a trolling god (see that one in character interview john patrick lowry did in uh 2014 i think) and Solly would eat that shit up.
Freedom Fries
Ehhh?
Art on here is cute. Don't get me wrong. Love that.
HOWEVER. in no universe would they actually Function as a couple. Sorry guys. 54727474 dead 277282848 injured.
I am also put off it because people flock to it (and, sigh, mediscout,) over boots n bombs in the emesis blue side of the fandom. I AM NOT SHIP SHAMING BY THE WAY, I GOT ACCUSED OF THAT ONCE AND HAVE YET TO EMOTIONALLY RECOVER, but i reallyyyy wish people would focus less on Most Toxicly Basic Yaoi Known To Man, and more on Tragic Doomed Yaoi Where Both Parties Actually Kind Of Like Eachother And Didn't Both Try To Kill Each Other (russian roulette and the grenade at the funeral). AGAIN I AM NOT SHIP SHAMING HERE PLS DON'T CONSUME ME SHIP WHAT YOU WANT GIRLYPOPS.
Sollypauling
I have a crack headcanon that he's her father so that's put me off seeing them romantically haha
I wrote a fic about The Fathering once at 12am and im still not sure whether i hate it or not so don't read it just to be safe <3
Magic Missiles
DIVORCED!!! *autism creature confetti gif*
Jay Pinkerton (comic writer) allegedly reblogged MM art once. And he refuses to let their dynamic go in the comics. I.e. "the heart wants what the heart wants, Merasmus". Truly their biggest fan.
I love them i really do. Only slightly less toxic than fucking adminpauling imo, and thats like britney spears dootdootdootdootdootdootdootdoot bweebwahbweebwahbwahh levels of toxic
Maggot Bears
Based based utterly based fucking detergent levels of based and thats like 13 or something on the pH scale (i.e. Extremely Based)
They do in fact destory everything around them, proving my earlier hypothesis lol.
Idiot 4 Idiot. Dumbass 4 Dumbass. They both get naked to pee. I love them. I want to be them.
Again, bonus points when Demo is involved. Uwaaa.
I love the lack of consistent ship name for them. East meets West? Maggot Bears? Boots n Brawn? Zhannasolly? There's one involving honey as well but i forgor it and I've been typing so much I've got pins and needles in my left hand so i give up. Peace.
#tf2 ship rank#APOLOGIES TO THE PERSON I PROMISED I WOULD DO HEAVY SOON.#i will do him next#just for u#tf2#team fortress 2#off topic but to me scout is also irish#as an irish person and a scout hater it pleases and pains me to say it#his ma emigrated from connemara (galway) (the west) (gaeltacht) (a section where gaelic is spoken) when she was a baby i dont make the rule#tf2 soldier#batting helmet#fireworks#that one is Untaggable ffs#tf2 fireworks#sollycest#boots n bombs#cold war#also Untaggable#tf2 cold war#wait so is batting helmet actually fuckkk thisssss#tf2 batting helmet#helmet party#american aviators#fruit scones#tf2 fruit scones#Urgh#freedom fries#zhannasolly#maggot bears#fuckkk im out of tags
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I know Im one of the only ones who thinks this. But I genuenly think, not even as a headcanon but as an active theory, that all architects are functionally interchangable and identical. That they all have the exact same body plan and share all memories and information, and are too driven to devote every aspect of themselves into some form of work, that forming something like a distinct personality is imposible. They do like and dislike things, but thats something the entire species shares, two architects will always have the same opinion on a given subject. In their ideal state, that of being updated and connected to the network, there is exactly ONE diferentiating factor between them, and that is the inherent ability for original thought. A thought may be original for a fraction of a milisecond but there is always the objective fact that one had it first. Some architects are just naturally better than others at this and that is the only pillar of architect hirearchy. That is why Al-An was specifically put in the position he was, due to an inane ability to have new, useful thoughts quickly. Now these thoughts become public knowledge and are therefore evaluated imediatly, and a thought that isnt then adopted by the whole species is subsequently tossed. This means that original thought is rare but original action is next to imposible. So architects are still all interchangable, there is only a nanosecond delay for an architect to recive thoughts from another, so you could really have one architect actually doing the job, and the other one sitting far away thinking of how to do it. And architect can think of a mistake. That is fairly normal and easely forgiven. What you will “never” hear about is an architect actually acting on a rejected thought.
#So anyway Human seed code-Almanac is only made definable by his fuck ups youve herad that from me before#subnautica#subnautica below zero#al-an#al an
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praxeus. episode of all time. yaz episode of all time. radiating self-assurance, showing off all the things shes learnt, wanting the doctor to see how good she is at this. at playing doctor and loving it. relishing having the keys to all places, having Secret Knowledge of Alien Things that she is in no way about to share with either jake or gabriela because where would be the rush of power in that?
jake, the (ex-)copper on a sabbatical. "except i dont go telling people im police!" give it a year or two love and youre using this (ex-)title on each of your self-found companions. which youre practicing now for with gabriela, pretty girl to forcefully introduce to her very first alien planet. well, almost.
both the girl best friends who've known each other for 5 years and one of which dies exploding, and the uncommunicative married/separated husbands who are punishing each other or themselves, one of which, again, almost dies exploding, looking like thasmin from every angle. (looking like thoschei, too, further back. because thats whats behind every picture of thasmin whichever way you cut it)
watching the identities slip and slide changing hands between all these parallels. Adam, sick astronaut, experimented on by aliens, clear doctor figure. or is he? jake, on the beach, sits where the doctor sits, saying he doesnt do emotions, admitting to being purposefully unreliable, unable to commit, disliking travelling! jake who can be summoned with a "help me". jake, who doesnt believe adam could really love him. who are we to apply this sentiment to, then? obviously, both. obviously, all.
"we didnt teleport into an active volcano!" yaz exclaims, too surprised at her own success to really be reassuring, as she holds onto her new friend's wrist, not hand, steering, directing, controlling. "im supposed to be the one saying that to you," the doctor responds, a year or three (or six, for yaz) later, when the destination is an active volcano, when in all these years theyve learnt to fly a spaceship together ("adam lang, your job is so easy!") but still havent figured out how to say the things that need saying, when one of them is dying, and the last time yaz was still pretending to be on sabbatical she knew for sure how old she was. two girls roaming.
the doctor wants so badly to figure this out, needs this win, after the identity shock of ruth, all the unanswered questions. even after the betrayal, after all the bad thats been done. "look at us, suki! two brilliant scientists, we can fix this!" whatever you did, whatever youve done, in desperation, wasnt right, but it's not the end. you can fuck it all up, and then you can help to try and unfuck as much as you can. just think. do not get carried away by fear. thats what scientist means, in the thirteenth doctor's mouth. someone who realises problems have solutions. that can be found. if you delay your frightened desperate furious reaction and just think for a second. she wishes she and suki could have worked together. she wishes they could have saved her planet as well as earth. she wishes she could have sent suki home, safe and sound, with solutions for whoever is left there, waiting for her, desperate and afraid. they will never know what happened. they will die sick and in ignorance.
adam offers himself up. hes dying anyway. they need a clinical trial and he is a suitable body to test on. makes you wonder. the master did not tell us everything, and what he didnt we'll never know, but as graham put it "i aint the fantasist round here" (detective morse, by the way, is not a reference i knew, but from wikipedia this character doesnt seem much to match jake's vibes, the master (and/or doctor) however...) what sense of duty might the child have felt? what sense of duty might the child have been talked into? or is that too patronising a way to frame it? what loyalty to her adoptive mother, a scientist and explorer, an example that still loudly resonates in 13, first-time woman, and what loyalty to her adoptive planet, people? what was life like on prehistoric gallifrey? "sparsely populated" is all we get. nothing about the possible reasons. disease doesnt seem out of the question. why did tecteun leave? "dangerous, unsophisticated space travel". why do something so dangerous? just the quest for knowledge? or was there desperation? was there fear?
"maybe," the doctor says, "i'll never know". and tecteun replies with a phrase the doctor herself has tried to leverage against yaz: the journey of a lifetime. "what do you do, 'Doctor'? pick people up, take them with you? you adopt them, use them, for reassurance, for company. theyre your experiments just as you were mine."
could she have been something else? who knows. but adam offered. and before that adam trained. and adam stepped into a rocket. and adam let himself be shot into space. scientist and explorer. and we're all full of plastic, whether we know it or not. and the doctor's a romantic. which is to say an idealist, here for the lost causes, a virus to kill the disease of our own making. infectious, and aware of it.
#rewatched praxeus :)#just bc it's 4 years old now and everyone is over it doesnt mean im gonna stop writing dumb posts abt it okay#im not over it yet#anyway yaz is so cute this episode i want to kiss her#shes so good at being the doctor <33333
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Behind the scenes
the lovely @dira333 tagged me in this and its sooo fun!! the questions are so amazing and id like to give it my best with some in depth answers, since learning these facts about one of my favorite writers here was so fun !!!!! behind the scenes of writing is so good to share!!
Started writing: i think ive always been writing. i remember when we used to have one computer for the entire family in the early 00's and had little screentime, i set alarms to 4-5am (with no concept of what that Would Do To Me emotionally without sleep LMAO) JUST to get some time to write in peace. my first fanfictions i published was on a homemade forum page with a friend when i was 11!
Started blogging: ive had my tumblr since 2009-ish where ive been a rp'er over multiple times and published d gray man and no. 6 fanfictions in 2011-12ish. i was also active on livejournal before i found fanfiction.net !! but this specific blog was made in may 2021!!! the reader inserts came then :3
Followers: i actually JUST hit 300 two days ago!!! which is very exciting. i dont always look at the number, since it doesnt necessarily correlate with engangement, but its fun to see the uptick!!
Communication: i genuinely love love LOVE the social part of social media, and communications so important to me. theres nothing better than reblogs with comments you can bounce off of, asks, dm's and all that! sadly, my disability makes it so hard for me to have continuous contact and im 90% of the time the one to drop the ball when it comes to replying :(( thats why its extra important to me/special with the mutuals who keeps reaching out and dont have the same social expectations about replying. even if im unable to reply the day that i receive the message, it still brings great joy seeing the notif!
Likes: i dont mind them! generally its not that important to me whether or not my followers interact a lot. a like still means the world to me. of course a reblog is much better and engages so much more (+ boosts me!!), but theyre good for my soul, too!
Requests: i get very few requests :( i think i like them, but i havent gotten enough to actually get a feel on whether or not it kills my writing spirit? generally i get very excited to be able to deliver something and it gets me up from the bed to write, but i sometimes fear im not providing what they wanted! its anxiety-inducing in some ways, but i love a good little writing challenge !!
Writing: i loove love love love writing for hours at a time, hyperfixating on it. sadly, my cat snøfle is Very Jealous of both my laptop and pc. giving him a substitution sadly doesnt help</3 so my writing is often limited to specific times of day, and when he gets tired of my keyboard clack-clack-clacking, its time to put on some one piece while he naps on me! i wish i could write more works or just scenes on my phone, but it hurts my hands So Much, so i only write small one shots when im heavily inspired but snøfles in A Mood!!
genre wise im a fluffy type. maybe some hurt/comfort but always leaning towards comfort. id like to write more disability fics to spread both awareness and visibility, but i sometimes struggle with putting in my own disabilities and not make them too personal or too detailed for others to not relate. its an overthinking problem, so i often procrastinate writing them., bcos i fear itll be too niche! but i always get positive feedback (excpet for that one time with inked coffee lmao) so im not sure whats holding me back!!!
i always listen to music when i write, and it differs a lot. when i wrote the star and the earth i listened to a lot of medieval-inspired music, and made a specific playlist for that. but when i write on my modern au's or canon compliant bnha/haikyuu, anything goes!
i love putting in 'boring' every day stuff into my fics, or small scenes that dont necessarily advance the plot but just gives a feel of the characters.
speaking of snøfle ^ i am no longer allowed to write for the evening.... so ill start some apothecary diaries and enjoy a cold soda on this hot and humid evening !!! mwuah mwuah if u read this far thank you, and i love you. i love all of you <3333
no pressure tags as always but would love to hear the answers and get to know u all! @cup-of-fluff @true-deru @mirandabarma @illuminiscentboba @tetsuskei @threadbaresweater @krystalgaia @petriquors @ktsumu @moonbeamwritings @ohtokki
#tag games#waaah genuinely this made me so excited. i love talking about writing. can never shut up#wanna hear yalls thoughts and answers too but always remember theres no pressure if these are too personal 1!! its okay to skip any if you#want!!! <3333 smooching u¨
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Wifeyyyyy! Tell me about Craig's sports Hobbies? Or Hobbies in general:3
ok feeling shitty rn so this’ll (hopefully) get my mind off of stuff
anyways oh boy there are SO many of these that i have this is gonna get long i think
starting off with sports, i feel like he’d be an active guy. not like gym bro buff craig kinda stuff you see, he’s definitely a lanky beanpole. but i feel like he does a few sports so has a bit of muscle
first off, basketball. i’m a truther for this one, i don’t see it a lot tho. like, i hc him as being pretty tall, and i don’t have much like canon advice to back this up but that and the fact that there’s a basketball in his garage in tsot- but i think it jus fits him tbh. and also because it’s funny, he’s a total fucking loser nerd, but since yk i’ve gotta stick to canon sometimes, he’s technically popular and attractive, he definitely has like a jock alter-ego or smth stupid like that LMAO
he definitely seems like a hockey guy. like- the enforcer is so him. he’d totally wanna beat people up just cus he can. also i think he’d be a really good skater- i think he’s a pretty well balanced person physically. also, i see kyle as doing hockey, and they’re definitely close. i just see them being friends making sense, so now theyll have a sport together. also- because im insane, ike does hockey too and kyle and craig help him practice
i believe i’ve seen this once, but yk. i always see boxer tweek and don’t get me wrong i love that, but i feel like craig would continue doing martial arts afterwards too. like he’s canonically a violent and angry guy, but he’s kinda mellowed out, and i feel like that’s him just holding it back or smth cus he gets in trouble alllll the time. tweek also probably scolds him for it. but i feel like it would be a good way for him to get out any extra emotions, because he is NOT good at expressing those. also, back onto lanky criag, he’s got long limbs, and i feel like that’s good for someone to do martial arts (trust me im projecting) also, that’s also why he has good balance i feel.
alright, done with sports, just normal hobbies.
starting off, he’s 100% a music guy. i see stuff about him preferring podcasts over music, but i see him as a total music guy. in @panicatthecourtx more recent posts, she kinda went over that stuff, but because yk, im the craig ceo i’ll go over it too. i call it dad rock cus thats what my dad listens to, but he definitely listens to nirvana, ac/dc, weezer, that kinda stuff. he’s just a nerd. but i feel like he’d also have music as a way to vent in some sort of way? idk if it makes sense this is just how my brain works, but when he’s stressed, overstimulated, or just down in the dumps he zones out and just listens to music. he’s also just a nerd
space, duh. he could go on and on about that shit for hours. he can make every constellation, am every galaxy, all the nebulas, and basically anything. especially black holes. they fascinate him, he finds them so interesting and yk. is a nerd about em. ik it doesn’t really tie in with space stuff but i’ll put it here, he definitely loves conspiracy theories, especially ones about aliens and stuff. he thinks of his own all the time. especially about other space related things. also, back to conspiracy, death absolutely fascinates him. he just want to know what happens after that.
this is a basic one, but sleeping. he’s the heaviest sleeper ever, literally sleeps 24 fuckin 7
he’ll never admit it, but he kinda likes school. not because he likes sitting around all day or listening to teachers drone on and on, it’s because usually he can talk about things. in classes he enjoys, it’s his favorite thing ever. i also see him as that one kid who literally never studies or pays attention and yet has all A’s in every class.
he’s 100% a reader. he can zone out and not lay attention to anything. he gets lost in books all the time and it’s so nerdy but he loves it. it’s almost like an escape from reality which he likes. he’d never admit it, but he frets stressed pretty easily so he enjoys the way to just be alone in his own world. this also ties in with the music hc- he probably listens to music while reading. he also just zones out a lot in general
this also kinda feeds into music headcanons but he skateboards. he just gives me 90s grunge/kurt cobain vibes and youll never change my mind on this. he thinks he’s so fuckin cool but he’s just some random ass lame kid but he gets away with it cus he’s mildly popular or whatever. but he definitely has a little mini skateboard for stripe
why do these headcanons keep feeding off of each other? i dont know but yk its ok. craig fucking loves mini things. it’s definitely iconic, cus my craig is really tall and has big ass hands. but small things remind him of tweek (my tweek is like 5’8 so compared to him yeah kinda short) but he’s just gay and loves anything and everything that reminds him of tweek
i’ve also realized i don’t need a really detailed description for everything so yeah uhh (don’t mind this it’s my train of thought)
he collects shit he has the most random stuff in his room. random lego pieces he found that he thought were cool, a shit tom of rocks, different leaves, little trinkets, anything space related, stickers, just stupid stuff. those are just the basics, but he has soooo much stuff
he loves making detailed lists and ordering them and stuff
going on hikes he loves hiking he just loves the outdoors tho
stargazing is a must. he loves it and has specific times and places for them
from like a singular scene in like on episode, he plays the fuckin violin cus he’s cool like that yk. because friends, he and wendy practice together- a friend headcanons that she plays the flute, so yk it works.
hanging out with friends is a must. especially clyde they have the bromance ever they’re so lovey dovey best friends
it’s like 2am and i’m getting lazy so here ya go this isn’t even half but alas it’s ok so have fun with my stupid ass spews ty for ur time
#south park#craig sp#craig tucker#south park craig#sp creek#tweek sp#tweek tweak#tweek x craig#clyde donovan#kyle broflovski#kyle south park#sp kyle#sp clyde#ike broflovski#ike south park#sp ike#sp headcanons#gwenrants
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question for susie: who do you think are the top 5 other kirby characters that could most get along with her? the 5 most likely ones that could be her friends, basically
i usually try to answer these as soon as i get them bc i have autism but i actually didnt manage to this time bc.honestly? i dont think susie has 5 friends.best conclusion i got is she has 3 friends n 2 girls who think theyre acquaintances
susie is just.so herself? i feel everyone thinks shes some degree of obnoxious n lacking on morals n just kinda seems weirdly shady.for ppl that like her tho:
i feel kirby is rly obvious but Who Doesnt Kirby Like? susie helped last at the end of KPR so as far as kirby cares shes all set for becoming a friend! in fact she essentially already is! she hasnt done evil things again so rly theyre on great terms.she lets them test ice cream flavor samples for HWCs ice cream brand
i think both susie n magolor consider each other annoying but they mean it affectionately.they get on each others nerves (its nearly always magolor doing the annoying) but somehow get along great anyways.its a mystery they just never fight seriously
taranza would get along w her as well, i think out of every wave 3 character hes the most actually friendable for everyone bc his freak isnt immediately noticed, but.theyre both freaks w no moral compasses n taranza is a professional woman apologist n what would susie want more than to get cry shoujo tears explaining her tragic story while he pats her back like "i completely understand...you were so justified queen dont listen to the haters"
rly she could tell magolor n taranza shes doing anything morally questionable n theyd reply "okay lol" "okay ^_^" if not straight up go w her
now the next 2.susie sure has intense feelings abt but they do not !
susies intense grudge for francisca originates from susie never outgrowing her "i HAVE to kill girls i feel threaten ME being the prettiest in the room" phase bc she didnt get a proper growing up experience.shes constantly making up ways francisca is stealing the spotlight from her.idk francisca was probably more welcomed by the other allies bc shes polite (i am not claiming franny is a nice girlie shes just polite but has the american psycho monologue going on in her head that entire introduction) n susies never gonna get over that bc "IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME EVERYONE LIKED!!!" anyways i think itd just be so godamn funny if francisca didnt? know susie wants her dead? shes socially absent she doesnt pay attention she doesnt care lmao.she thinks theyre acquaintances bc of how often susie "talks to her" (shes trying to be subtly mean).even if she realized susie hated her shed be like "okay lol.good morning to you too"
n ive already mentioned it before but im a suzan yuri believer but not a "susie can win anyone over" believer.shes had a long running lesbian crush on zan w 50 layers to it (ranges from "she has such an aura of coolness ♪" to "i can fix her n i can kill her father too i can save her" to "WE CAN MATCH EACH OTHERS FREAKS.TOGETHER.") n has tried every way to try winning her over n zan doesnt understand a single one of them.she believes theyre acquaintances.susie could literally kiss her n shed reply "...my HP bar is already full but thanks.i guess." ironically most times that get zan liking susie a little more is when shes not actively trying to rizz her up, bc oh man.susie was right they match each others freaks of "im the only normal person in this room.(unstable weirdo)".the only ppl this yuri can be considered toxic for is everyone else.
outside of those 5 i think everyone to some degree dislikes her.n yes i think shed play victim abt that.im a firm believer nobody in wave 3/4 save for flamberge is properly befriendable to most of the cast (franny n taranza r in good terms w most ppl but again.inner american psycho monologue girl n polite looking guy who had way too much working for the evil monarch).n thats their appeal theyre all kinda shitty ppl 🩷 i wish i could end this w a beautiful rant on how shitty traumatized ppl still deserve love n redemption but honestly i just think characters r more fun when they kinda suck lol
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Fucked up ship bingo harrykim and jh discoelysium
-@mansplainmanipulatemalewife
MY BELOVED MUTUAL WHO IS WITH ME THROUGH MY FLOPS <333
ok so kimharry
i am going to expand on everything i marked and you dont get a say in it
-> undeniably t4t
i dont care much for t!kim tbqh, it's become too mainstream for me. my approach for it is "eh, why not?"
now harry on the other hand...
oh i am FERAL for t!harry you have NO IDEA. TRANS MAN HARRY? AUGHHHHH. TRANSFEM HARRY? OUGHHHHHHH. NB HARRY? WAUGHHHHH. IM HERE FOR IT. it's so fuckin good n i eat it up every single time. his canon issues with his masculinity gives perfect content to toy with his gender in every which way and it is divine
and so yeah that is to say. t4t kimharry is a fuck yeah
-> terrible for each other (affectionate)
they clash. thats it thats the post. opposites attract typa stuff. thats why i marked the "(affectionate)" one
-> playing with them like dolls (taking them on dates and making them be all cute)
DOMESTIC KIMHARRY FUCKS. FIGHT ME ABOUT IT. we see them under a time crunch interacting with the mystery of a hanged man looming over their head and their districts in a pissing contest and with harry freshly amnesiac. i want to see the fall out. i want to see the progress. i want to see them when they're not focused on other plot things and we can get to the character development part. i want to see how they deal with themselves and each other on a normal day
-> thinking about them Always and Forever
yeag
-> LET THEM HAVE A HAPPY ENDING‼️‼️
BRO THE BAD ENDINGS FOR DE... MY HEART CANT TAKE THAT SHIT. let them be nontoxic partners. let them have good stuff in life. let them have each other. PLEASE.
-> the DEVOTION oh my GOD
there was a whole post analyzing how theyre devoted to each other and why theyve latched onto each other dont make me rewrite it
harryjean
WE GOT A BINGOOOO WOOOOO🎉🎉
ok here we go
-> i want them 2 make out with blood in their mouths like vampire bats
i dont think i need to explain, it is quite concise. do i think this will solve anything between them? no. should they do it regardless? absolutely yes
-> divorced <3
in my humble opinion they are more divorced than harry and dora are. yall r underestimating the power of toxic masculine work friendship in which they hang onto each other to not kill themselves and then one of them just forgets about it. maybe the divorce is one sided but they are. they rly are.
-> they will die together in a heart shaped pool of blood
(◕ᴗ◕✿)
-> terrible for each other (derogatory)
oh ueah absolutely. they constantly fought and argued and anything and everything. they made the other's anger levels skyrocket, on purpose, just to get a rise out of em. but they still needed each other. it's not like either could afford a therapist, much less working in a place that was actually not-actively-killing-them-slash-making-them-suicidal. they were all they had
-> "you should see the other guy" *points at a dead body*
that finna b jean fr
-> playing with them like dolls (Psychological Torture)
they are The guys for angst <333
-> thinking about them Always and Forever
yeagh
-> sicko 2 sicko communication
absolutely
-> they should kill each other
self explanatory <3
tiny little disclaimer i didnt play enough to meet jean and this is based off of what i gathered about him from other peoples' jeanposting so if it's ooc. oops. it's basically the version of him i crafted in my head
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Bladders Gat3 Finish doc
:et me get the rest of my fucking feelings out about baldurs gate:
im so mad bc any character who is not human or realism/white passoid is literally regarded with the same type of dismissal that you would see in mainstream media. all the companions that are not white passing are treated like shit and have bad ends.
-Lae'zel (gith) gets abducted by the a bad guy for the last 1/3 of the game (also we could talk about her being the fighter class as default is also a bit racist, but the deep dive will be its own essay). and then she can die and not be able to be resurrected. (resurrection scrolls and revivify spells ONLY work on companions and not npcs)
Wyll (THE ONLY BLACK HUMAN MAIN CHARACTER, side note we could talk about how is name is spelled like a white mormon names their kids) is a big talking point bc he is constantly strung between the expectations put upon him by himself, his family, and then his pact matron. AND NO MATTER WHAT OPTION IS CHOSEN WILL CONTINUES TO SUFFER IN THIS EXECUTIVE PURGATORY. He starts as a "i have to kill this devil" actually its a tiefling (suddenly its now fantasy racial infighting, so of course u dont wanna kill another companion so early in the game, so Wyll is forced through Hell's Circles and the exposure makes him grown large demonic horns. (Wyll does not have control over his body or himself, nor his actions, and only suffers the consequences of the actions of the Tav (PC)). Wyll even gets to have the "I did everything for my father's (approval just to have my father misunderstand me and then the most noble course of action is to be independent because i am still bound by choices prior and also if two black people form any sort of family on screen its disgusting and blasphemous so I might as well treat my father like my brother who i never was able to relate to when i was younger" THIS IS NOT MENTIONING THAT WYLL IS LITERALLY THE SON OF THE DUKE OF BALDURS GATE. HE GIVES UP HIS STATUS OF NOBILITY TO BE HEROIC AND IS JUST FOREVER CONTINUALLY PUNISHED. THE DUKE OF BALDURS GATE IS BRAINWASHED TO RELINQUISHING HIS TITLE AND CORONATES THE WHITE DEVIL EVIL DICK BAD GUY WHO SOLD KARLACH (TIEFLING) TO HELL FOR GIGGLES.
Karlach (tiefling) is a bright eyed noble hearted character that is looking for solace after having 10 years of her life taken from her when she got sold to devil and hell and made a war machine slave because thats perfectly tragic. Her heart is taken from her and replaced with an engine (machine) that is slowly killing her when she is not in Hell. THE ENGINE DOESNT EVEN HAVE A GOOD IN GAME MECHANIC, YOU GET TO SET URSELF ON FIRE TO GET A 'HEAT' DEBUFF THAT U CAN CONSUME ON AN ATTACK, you build heat any other way, so its like only <Lv. 4, and if you minmaxed the opening scene, you get a 2h sword that does this every attack, so like its a bit moot and useless. Furthermore i think its really stupid that shes yearning for companionship and yet is not allowed because her engine makes her to hot to touch. Which rubs me the wrong way as a black transfem (u could argue tiefling coded) because I already feel like that. I feel like im too intense and hot with my passions and i intimidate people to the point that I'm actively denying myself the intimacy i crave so dearly just by existing and expressing myself. The taxation of life shouldn't really exist in video games!! The whole party gets mind enslaving brainworms that magically dont work because the plot armor is really strong yet the demon character who EVEN WHEN THEY SEEK HELP IN THEIR COMPANION QUEST ARE DENIED THE REALITY OF LIVING COMFORTABLY BECAUSE THEY SHOULD ONLY EXIST IN HELL. (cried actually). Before the last of this mess, she offers to turn into a mindflayer just to give herself the peace that she could be the hero that saves the world (become the villain because its better than who you currently exist as, or die being yourself (who has LITERALLY BEEN DEMONIZED). Karlach doesn't get to have have a happy ending because she either dies from engine overdose or goes to hell just to fucking breathe. THE KICKER IS THAT WYLL, THE PERSON WHO WAS GOING TO KILL HER AS PART OF THE WARLOCK PACT, OFFERS TO ACCOMPANY HER IN HELL AND FIGHT BY HER SIDE. WHICH MEANS THAT ALL OF THE MARGINALIZED IDENTITIES EFFECTIVELY FUCK OFF AFTER YOU SAVE THE WORLD.
White victim Shadowheart has the option of rejecting what she knows (which was a lie told her) or believing it. The worst she has to do is kill a bound seraphim, and free her parents held captive by putting their souls to rest (she turns them into light, killing them). She gets sick weapons. Clerics are busted anyway.
White devil astarion got to ascend in pale supremacy and got cool vampire powers (bite+, bite++, buff on kill, and consume buff for heal || next hit crits). The final battle WAS BUGGED FOR ME. I WAS STUCK ON THE BOSS FIGHT FOR TWO WEEKS BECAUSE THE END OF BATTLE SCREEN WOULDNT LOAD. LIKE I MADE A WHOLE NOTHER CHARACTER BECAUSE I BEAT THE BOSS 7 TIMES AND MY BUGFIXED DIDNT WORK!!
if im gonna get so heated about video games i am just gonna go play bloodborne so i have no room to complain bc im constantly sucking
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Hi! I was wondering about your Lost Guardian au from ages ago, do you think you’ll ever plan on updating it and if not, could someone else take up the fic?
So heres the thing. If someone wants to write a fic *inspired* by The Lost Guardian, i’m not gonna stop them, and i’d probably feel super honored so long as the inspiration was correctly credited!
As for ‘taking up the fic,’ the short answer is no.
I have active drafts and the rest of the story already planned out to its finish, notes, even a branch-off fic set post-story that will likely go up on my nsfw blog if i ever get around to editing it. The Lost Guardian hasn’t been abandoned, it’s simply on hiatus. (And yes, i recognize 3 almost 4 years so far is a really fucking long hiatus. The Chapter 9 draft doc was made in december of 2020, and last edited in July 2022)
I started writing that fic whilst still in highschool, a time where I was 17 and didnt have to worry yet about getting my license or maintaining a part time job, i had an over abundance of freetime even partially to my detriment, the fandom was booming and I had plenty of feedback, and this fic was (and still *is*) a story im proud of.
But i’m 22 now, working a full time job to pay rent and account for a number of minor ‘disabilities’(best word i have for them atm) that I cant ignore or push to the side nor treat poorly, from the lasting effects on my body of stunted growth to celiac/glutent intolerance to adhere to that directly determines how easily my body functions for the week, to dealing with glasses i cannot afford to break and taking care of teeth i cannot afford to fix, taking care of my mental health and using the free time i have to do what brings me the most joy at that time.
The sanders sides fandom has heavily quieted down with the season finale hiatus and I’d like to think I did pretty well for going six long years dedicated solely to that without cracking under the silence, because *I knew* when I caved to something else it’d be a long while before I had the drive to come back with any sort of resolution to my active works. Thats just how my hyper fixations work. I cannot focus on multiple at once, it’s too much to process simultaneously and takes away my enjoyment bc I tend to watch/consume things repeatedly to catch every little detail i missed. And it doesn’t help when one loses steam because their content barely breaks 100 notes(80% of which are likes, 15% are reblogs with the occasional comment, and 5% are self-reblogs) when back in the height of it all, a few thousand notes was pretty average interaction. This blog still has about 11.5k followers, almost all of which came from the height of the fandom period. So for now i’ve moved onto the FNAF DCA fandom, bc it is fresh and new to me.
I know you didn’t mean to poke the bear here, I get it, but like.. C’mon. Any other fic of mine likely wouldn’t have gotten the same reaction in full but, still. I’ve had to answer this question a handful of times over the years at the point, which might be why this response feels so charged, and i’m sorry.
I don’t mean to come off as snippy or rude, but it *is* kind of invasive to offer to finish one’s creative work when it’s taking too long and theres very little payback for it. I’ve got adhd, delayed satisfaction isn’t a thing I experience. Just guilt that it wasn’t finished in a way for me to post it in time before I broke and lost all motivation to share it.
In my head, TLG has been long finished and held the ending for years, theres just been no energy to put in the effort of finish writing it for others to read. I’m still trying to get my life together to change that, don’t get me wrong, but the American economy is literally in shambles so who knows how or even if i’ll manage that. Call me selfish for being content with only mentally having my creative story’s ending and a collection of rambles and notes to show for it, but at the end of the day, it’s still my story, and i dont feel comfortable with people trying to ‘take up the mantle’ to finish it, when they don’t know how it ends.
I’m glad you like it enough to want to, though, I really *really* am. I’m just sorry I haven’t been able to finish it for you all. And i just don’t know when that will be, I just know that I *want* to do so, however long it takes.
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