#and thats only because i'm hyperfixated on the game

[velvet-apricots]

What is it about Gideon that you like so much?

So first of all to summarize everything below-

Okay now onto the mindless ranting and rambling.

So to be frank, the entire reason i first got into Gideon was a tiktok showing a few members of the hold and if the poster thought they were hot and I saw his armor and I was like "oh fuck he looks like the witch-king that's kinda hot. Oh man he has a hot voice too."

And then I went into a bit of a spiral and suddenly I bought the whole ass game just because I developed a hyperfixation on Gideon Ofnir. This is not an exaggeration.

Anyway, I love the tragedy of him. A man dedicated to the goal set before him, but in the end he seemingly gives up. I love how he has been there probably since the beginning, and he has seen the Roundtable hold's slow decline, and witnessed countless Tarnished fail and turn on one another.

What kind of man was he before that? Was he kinder? Was he hopeful? How do these losses affect him? Does he loose sleep thinking about those that are gone? Does he loose sleep over the things he's done to ensure the success of the tarnished? What did he learn that made him finally give it all up and turn on the player?

Most people just see a scheming fool, but I see something much more than that. Yes, he's an asshole, he's a bad father, yeah yeah I know all that, but he's one of the only surviving tarnished that is implied to have a great rune and still see grace, as the Two-Fingers expect great things from him.

I just wish more people could see past the first impressions and look deeper and THINK about him. Really think. AAAGH.

Onto the ranting part (and venting)-

I am so sick how people mindlessly hate on him. Most only hate him because he doesn't kiss your ass and instead tells you he expects you to earn your place. God forbid a man who is sick of people sucking up resources wants you to prove you can do what needs to be done. Others hate him because of the bad things he did, which okay thats fair! but Marika has killed more people and abandoned more children than Gideon ever did and she still has a huge amount of die hard defenders (I am one of them). Why is Gideon so universally hated? I just don't get it. =(

Also, totally petty of me, but I refuse to play the Convergence mod because they removed his boss battle and replaced it with some worthless dude that has no importance to the story at all., like WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? He's important! He's the leader of the Tarnished! He was your guide! His betrayal is narratively important and you just erase it because he's another npc battle? fuck that i'm not playing your mod then!

Anyway, yeah thats my tedtalk/petty ranting for the day. =)

[youredreamingofroo]

Goodbye? I don't think so. I hope not. A very, very long rant about storage (🙄), simblr and whatever the fuck else I go on about for a few paragraphs. Skip to the end at the gold text for a more.... "definitive" answer. Especially if you want to skip the nitty gritty and sappy wappy.

i dont know what to do anymore, I freed up 18 GBs of space it all managed to go down the drain in literally an hour, Im moving my blender things to my external HDD, because that alone is 20 GBs (because of Scene sizes), I just hate to free up the space because I dont want it to go right back down. This all sucks cuz I really really enjoy being on Simblr, but sims 4 just continues to be a nuisance, whether its actual problems or its storage problems, it just always finds a way, every year, to get me to suddenly decide that im retiring until my next bout of Sims 4 hyperfixation. I love all of you guys and I love seeing how you all enjoy my work, and what I do, and I love seeing your stuff, you all make such amazing creations, granted if I stopped playing TS4, it wouldnt mean I have to stop interacting on simblr, it just wouldnt be the same. A pattern I notice anytime I start a social media platform, is that something always finds its way into completely demotivating me from posting, whether it's just literal lack of motivation, depression, realizing a project is too vast for me, storage problems, it's always something and it's always when I finally get comfortable or happy on a platform, especially after making friends, not that im saying my friends are one of the reasons I leave, thats far from it. I REALLY dont wanna take a break from Sims 4, I really really genuinely wanna start posting my story (W.A.S), but I'm not like a Sims 4 youtuber, I can't remain dedicated to one game, I play other games, I wanna play the Witcher games (or at least try to play them, I kinda suck rn), I wanna finish Detroit become human, I want to 100% Beyond two souls (and DBH), I wanna finish Disco elysium (started and never fucking finished 💀), I want to play Baldur's Gate 3, I mean, I purchased it at full price and I can't even play the game??... 😮‍💨 You get the point. At this point I wouldn't consider this a "goodbye," note, not... necessarily? I just get so frustrated having no storage, not to mention the fact that I need storage to literally do the stuff I do, like make edits, make poses, make renders, so the fact that I can't even do that, is just like... what's the point of even having Sims 4 anymore at that point? But I don't wanna leave simblr, I don't want to stop creating. It's funny, as I write this, I continue to give myself more and more of a reason to leave, the only real thing that's stopping me is just the fact that there's so many nice people here, I know that if I stopped playing the sims 4, I'd probably move onto another game (BG3................,,,,,..) and leave tumblr, or, at least leave Simblr. Which as I (think) said before, that's sad, I'd be sad, I'd miss people like Lori (groovetrys) and Lauren (miralure), June (circusjuney), Jade (gamyrmaiden), Anna (holocene-sims), butter (buttertrait), Fae (acuar-io), Verco (vercosims) and god, so many others, and sorry to break the atmosphere suddenly, but as I'm writing this, I'm listening to "In another life," from Everything everywhere all at once and it's making this very emotional for me, so if it gets sappy I apologize.

And I guess to be... insanely honest, as much as I want to release my story (trust me, I REALLY want to), I'm slowly beginning to realize more and more how not-easy it's gonna be to make scenes, writing it is fine for me, its just setting up the scenes feels like i'm forbidden to a life of staring at a bunch of words (pose names) trying to figure out what's what, where is what, what to do, where is where, who is who, who is what, how is what, how and why, need I continue. Storytelling is so insanely important to me, I believe that despite how little I read and despite how terrible of a student I have been, and despite how poor my literature skills are, that storytelling is still so important, fuck it, poetry has been such an inspiration for me, but I don't fucking know how to write poetry?? I can barely understand poetry at times, but it's still all so beautiful to me, the concept and the fact that people use metaphors so meticulously to create an allegory for something beautiful, or traumatic or sad, like in not so berry, the concept of an ocean being alexanders "love," and cataleya drowning in it, and her realizing she's drowning in his "love," but when she wants to leave, she really wonders if she actually wants to leave, to conceptualize and create this awful relationship in the means of an ocean is so... well, not beautiful in a reality sense, but in a technical/literary sense, it's beautiful, it's expression, and THATS what im passionate about. Remember what I said about getting sappy? Yea, sorry about that. After a while, I wonder what good repeating myself does, I've said about 5 or 6 times that I don't want to leave, yet here I am, with the mouse over the uninstall button like an idiot about to press the big "DON'T TOUCH" button, perhaps it's the idea that after repeating myself over and over again, that maybe I'll make up my mind, do I do a coin flip? I never listen anyways, I always continue to flip until it lands on what I like. So... why am I still writing? To be honest, I should've stopped by now, but you can only stop a dam so much before it all comes out. I do this with my friends, when I'm sad, I pour my heart out until it's a repetitive and overcooked version of "I'm sad." I write paragraph after paragraph and I literally could've just said "I don't have storage. Considering leaving simblr," and the same message would've gotten across, and I apologize, if you're still reading this, for making such a lengthy post, but I couldn't quite help spilling a bit of water everywhere, although I guess now my little puddle of water has become a flood. I use metaphors a lot, I apologize... again.

So what does all this bullshit that I typed out mean?

I don't know. I wonder the same myself, I'm fighting a battle more fierce than the one I had with my period last week, "Do I uninstall Sims 4 so I can have more freedom, and enjoy more content? or do I continue this rigorous battle of needing storage for the sake of a tumblr page, my enjoyment for writing and other shit I do in the sims 4?" I cannot say I will take a hiatus, because I will procrastinate, and I will forget completely about posting, and tumblr in general. I do still, at the very least, want to release my Official Teaser for my story, whether it be my last post or not, and at the very least, I want to introduce you to the characters, whether it be my last post(s) or not. Not to mention the fact that I want to continue sharing about Roo even if it's not about sims 4 anymore, I mean hell, I haven't even finished off the Leo and Roo part of his timeline.

For an INCREDIBLY watered down answer on whether or not this is goodbye, I say to you, not in this moment, not definitive enough for you yeah? Well, that's the thing, I don't have a definitive answer, you could fucking tear apart this entire college essay mat-pat style, and still not have a definitive fucking answer, and that's because I don't, sorry to all the people who don't want to listen to me rant or who want a clear answer, but I just don't have one. I've been known to make impulsive and on the whim (when I'm really emotional) decisions, and this is a situation where I don't want to do that, because I care about what I have here with ya'll.

If this ends up being one of my last posts, I bid you all adieu, I love you all, and I thank you so so so much for the laughs, and for the mutual connection we may or may not have had, I do not know if I'll make any actual posts for the next few days as I consider my decision, I will float around of course and continue reblogging this and that, and commenting and liking, etc etc. There's also a chance I may wake up tomorrow and look at this and think I was just being overly emotional about this stuff, and that now I look like an idiot, which is the case 9 times out of 10.

[pinkyjulien]

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🟨 DATABASE: Mitch Anderson 🔧

▶ PROFILE | APPEARANCE | CYBERWARE

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▶ OBLIGATORY DISCLAIMERS 🛑

*This is a fan work and in no way related to or endorsed by CDPR.

*This is entirely based on my own experience with the game and the character. In no way or form am I claiming the informations presented here as *the* canon and never have been. All of the informations presented here are my own headcanons based on my own experiences and analyses of the character and his surrounding.

*If any of the informations presented here upset you, please feel free to hide and/or block me.

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▶ Personal shtuff under read more 😖

AAAAAH... So- this is actually kind of old ghfhghf

it's still one of the thing I'm the most proud of 👉👈

I updated it slightly, fixed some stuff, some phrasing here and there, but I wanted to repost it, mainly because it used to be on a side page that I ended up deleting last year, and since I cannot search anything anymore on my now flagged main blog, I wanted to have it somewhere accessible!

It's a surprise to no one that Mitch is my favorite ghfhgf

He's actually the first fictional character I've been this much passionate about! He unlocked a lot of creativity, learned a ton of new skills and met a ton of new amazing people thanks to this pixel man...

Hyperfixating on him and the game helped me through a lot of shitty events those past years- I'd even go as far as saying he pretty much saved my life, in a way?

And spending time exploring his (small, but still present) lore and trying to expand it in a canon-compliant way has been my own way of.... "thanking him" ??? AND I KNOW HOW THAT SOUND, absolutely batshit insane ghfhgf

I really appreciate his character, how he was written and built, what his role is in the game, how the devs sprinkled all of this interesting info surrounding him, in his expressions and body language, small details in his tent and car...

He means a lot to me gfhgfh OK THATS IT THATS IT 🤡🤙

If you made it through all this-- HI Thank you for reading ghfhgf

and remember that this is only my headcanons!

[yonpote]

ok not to get fucking sap and personal over here, but like. every time ive hyperfixated on dnp, was during the holiday season. because i was always so incredibly depressed and stressed out and this anxious mess that genuinely barely left the house. this is the first year that i am back to being invested in dnp, but i feel happy. i'm no longer at this dark point in my life where i felt they were the only ones i could turn to. and now i can just revel in queer joy and whimsy. and so can they!!!!! the gaming channel return is about queer joy!!!!! "buh buh rudy not everything is about them being gay" but being gay affects so much of their life including trauma and happiness and they are experiencing a happiness that can only be felt in this intense sort of way thats so hard to explain that you cant put a single word on but you just know it when youre in it.

[ladadee195]

Ladadee meets Legends of Avantris at Too Many Games 2024 (LONG POST read at your discretion)

I'm not one to write up a trip report cause I'm firmly in the "no one gives a shit." camp but for this I feel like people will get a kick out of my anxious distress over the past two days and I know those that couldn't make it would also appreciate it.

I knew a few months ago that when LOA said they were gonna be at TMG that I could go, its only an hour away from me. I'd gone to TMG back in 2019 to meet Brandon Rogers of Youtube and Helluva Boss fame and even then I didn't get HALF as nervous as I did the past two days. I was a shaking hyperventilating mess. Embarrassing, truly.

Friday was worse then Saturday.

First off, we'd barely parked in the parking lot when we see Andy casually strolling across the parking lot and get into his very nice red mustang, nice to see where the car vlogs happen!

By the time we got to the booth I could barely breath but I wanted to grab my free pin and say hi first. I want to disclaimer this by stating that I realize LOA tries really hard to make it perfectly clear that the Party and fam are regular people that work hard to produce their content and be successful at what they do without being celebrities or influencers. Logically, I know this and I respect the hell out of it. However my hyperfixated brain and general anxiety made it incredibly hard for me to remain CALM. Its really hard to remain calm when you've been watching them by yourself alone in your room hours upon hours and then suddenly there they are in real life before you, talking to YOU! How am I meant to be remain calm?

Anyway, I met Andy and Nikkie. Talked briefly with Andy and just generally embarrassed myself but he's so cool ya know and is probably used to it all things considered. I asked them both to sign my Cake Chad shirt, both we're happy to do so and I got a great hug from Nikkie. After that I cut my losses and decided to move on. Their meet and greet wasn't for a few hours and we were hungry. When the meet and greet came, I jumped in line to get a picture. It went really quick and I got no chance to really talk to them but they were super awesome and I love the picture! I knew they were TALL but god I felt like a hobbit.

The live show wasn't until 7:30 so we left the con to check into our hotel and relax for a few hours. It was a nice break and I finally got to breath. We returned to the con and got seats for the live show.

if you haven't already seen other's overviews or the whole video I wont spoil anything but it was SO good. I was so curious about what they could possibly do for a one shot but holy shit was that amazing. Its always interesting and fun to attend live shows with cheering and laughter and suggestive whistles. Gives one a sense of community you only ever get a taste of on here or discord.

Afterwards we went back to our hotel and rewatched the whole show on the live stream LOL

Saturday I was much calmer because I had a goal. Get the whole parties signatures and not be embarrassing.

We did a lot of waiting cause the con opened at 11 and again their meet and greet was at 3 but we managed to pass the time well enough and then we got back in line. An readers when I tell you how amazing it went!?? I was very proud of myself even though I was still nervous and shaky I did much better.

They all were super cool and signed my Hootise shirt. I still geek out thinking about it! But the best thing happened. Richie saw my Gideon/Kremy candy bead bracelet I'd made myself and legit forgot I'd worn for this exact reason. This is how that went. Richie: is that a Kremy and Gideon candy bracelet?

Me: YES!I forgot I had that on!

Richie: thats the best I gotta get a picture and show Mace.

I was DYING omfg. The two behind the ship SAW my ship bracelet??? still freaking out. I decided that I should have made ones for them. I convinced myself they wouldn't like them, I know better now for next time.

After they'd all signed my shirt I gave them my thanks and MAYBE acted a little embarrassing when I told them name and that I was already in the discord but as I said earlier they're so cool and awesome I doubt they noticed me being like that.

i felt like even though it was short I had a really good moment with them which is all I really wanted.

I regret a lot of things. Like the fact that I had plans on making them gifts but ran out of time due to me being sick like right up until Friday and being so nervous and scared and I acted only a little crazy. I know next time (PAXUnpluged in Dec?) I'll be much better prepared.

I hope those that cared to read this very long post enjoyed my little overview. Just remember even though you may be scared and nervous to do something, you still should cause you never know how great it might be at the end.

[pears-trinkets]

I watched a tiktok some days ago where OP was talking about their art variating in quality according to what they were drawing. Like for example when they were doing commissions quality plummeted and they'd ragequit because it was so frustrating even if they wanted to make it work but when they were drawing fanart for a series they loved it would be on a completely different professional level

And then they explained how they talked to a friend about it and the friend asked them

"Well are you passionate about art or are you passionate about the media you're drawing?"

Which sounds so simple and obvious but I literally needed it to be spelled out like that for it to click??

I feel like some kind of spell has been lifted a bit since then? I dont know

But all my life I was passionate about art itself and was only drawing TO DRAW but then with the internet and fandoms (that bring community and more engagement thats passionate in itself) but also art school and pressure to make a living out of it and to not get lost in the algorithm I was actually mad at myself why I couldn't draw fanart and capture that fanart vibe etc as others could but it was literally just not my main thing and wouldnt be sustainable longtime on its own

And I've literally burned myself out doing that and ever since I thought I'd use series and fanart like a crutch to get myself going again because I couldn't even imagine doing it on my own without any help but I've been actually doing myself a disservice with that?

I was trying to mend my problem with anime and movies and books and games but that's not what was broken to begin with

Its just such a different approach to everything to think "I'm getting my passion, love and joy for art back" and "I'm getting my passion for the media I love back through fandom and their passion I can piggyback off of" and how it makes things work from within and I feel stupid for thinking like that

Because at the end of the day it comes down to you and having to sit with yourself while drawing and how that's making you feel

And now it absolutely makes sense how so many people I knew were doing art but actually hated it and talked negatively about it and had no fun in art itself because they just wanted to contribute or show their love to a fandom but didnt enjoy doing it through drawing

And why we couldn't really connect because of these different approaches because while I was like DRAWING DRAWING DRAWING they were CHARACTER ABC CHARACTER ABC CHATACTER ABC

I dont know

It has been such an impactful thing I thought I might as well share it for anyone who needs it

The creator on tiktok is @ almostzander and they also concluded that it was an audhd hyperfixation problem and I'm still letting that simmer a bit in my head because I think that everyone experiences this on some level like just doing something for the wrong reasons to put it simple but I also think we are definitely more deceptive to that!

(this is me letting it simmer)

[loser-otaku-girl]

On anon right now because I'm anxious but one of my mutuals and I have been hyperfixating over this game and I've gotten so tired of it because it's all we've been talking about for the past 7 months and they get so bored with me when I try to talk about something else what if i kms (joking obviously)

nooo thats so sad. cuz like 7 MONTHS??? thats so long 2 only talk bout one thing. prayin for ya

[abimee]

so tbh i was hard on nier:a while playing it cos i don't really like a lot of the anime tropes BUT i really like tragedies and i was promised some twists, and got some. but i wanted to ask you how you felt about the pacing. basically, did it feel like there was a solid line connecting plot points, or do you feel like certain things happened at random? barring the fact that yoko taro said he literally wrote the story out of order, is that how it felt to you? imo it felt really rushed through super cool parts and like things that were annoying or setpieces ran on for too long. ig i'm still fked up over how much it fell short of my expectations bc even after playing nier:a completely thru and h8ing how absurdly film-student its tone and ideology are, i was hyperfixated enough to read some of the side literature and learn drakengard lore. tl;dr, nier:a is cool and has some fun parts but i wish the android were more mature (or artificial) in physicalilty to avoid weird anime loli baiting in the fans and also they'd asked a writer to help revise and implement the og author's ideas okay bye thx for reading my rant ♡ i'm glad u had fun and ur fanart abt a2 and the indoor grill made me cough

ill gladly listen to people bitch about yoko taro ive had PROBLEMS with this man since a young age ☝️☝️☝️☝️

I was actually thinking about the pacing and insertion of certain scenes/plot points today because admittedly like. okay this might be all over the place but

The start of the game (Route A + B) was like pretty solid pacing I think due to being low risk, and I thought it was cool that the game let you see 9S' side of things --- but it really started to fumble when it got into it's moe complex storylines in C-D-E and went on to deposit a lot of information on it to the point where it felt like we were forgetting entire plots and characters because something new and shiny showed up

Like okay first off. Adam and Eve and the aliens. We never once got any sort of explanation WHY adam + eve killed the aliens, or why the aliens made the machines, but within that general thought we did learn that humans died before going to the moon (and possibly even before the aliens came?), and that YoRHa's only goal was to fight the machines until a specified amount of data was gotten and then they were to explode. Never did we get more elaboration on the aliens or adam/eve, and while we got some YoRHA spotlight stuff it also entirely just decided that explaining the true mission behind making YoRHa and why the androids had to die is beyond it. Which frustrated me because it Brings Up Ideas but doesn't specify if thats the true reason, like we learned that the machines fight purely because that was there sole reason, and so they made an enemy for themselves purely to enact that goal that the aliens gave --- but then it even goes ''haha okay but hear me out'' and introduces Red Girl and this vague idea of the Machine Ego and wanting to defy their masters of the aliens, but then DOESN'T ELABORATE WHY. Like we don't know WHY adam and eve and the machine ego wanted to develop enough to defy their machine logic and purpose because it wraps back around to ''theyre human just like us because they want to defy their masters because.... they're human like us?"

Like it often felt like some concepts or plots brought up walked itself in a circle, dog-chasing-tail style, where it's entirely contained within itself and refuses to expand upon it's existence, which then causes it to get sort of left behind when the plot finds a new fancy idea to latch onto. Like how quickly the story introduced, focused on, then discarded Adam & Eve is almost criminal because of the things it could've done with them literally as the closest approximation to what the Machine Ego/Red Girls wanted, since they defied their creator's orders to be their own selves. Eve especially feels wasted in this regard --- like if the plot spent a little more time focusing on Eve & Adam in a B-plot scenario showing Eve and Adam learning more from humans and even leaning into Eve's wants that we saw in his mind when 9S hacked him (the human home built around him and his brother, and his brother wanting to go somewhere peaceful with him). Like they even could've tied that to when they get on the Ark and leave and Adam is holding Eve, that's literally Adam bringing Eve somewhere peaceful, but because those two instances are so seperated from each other and their own sort of throw-away concepts it becomes hard to Remember the tether between those two thoughts

This is also my biggest problem with A2's writing, I can only assume she's meant to be a Kaine-type character (and boy did my eyes momentarily widen seeing Emil say ''it must be fate that we've met!" to her) where her reserved nature and somewhat limited character blends in with her personality, but they really could've just given us like at least 2 more hours-game to learn about her past rather than just infodump us with her lore in some logs at the Resistance Camp. This is another problem Red Girl had where I feel like the fact you get unit data on them that basically explains away the confusing parts of their involvement in the lore felt cheap because this game has over 40+ hours under it's belt but couldn't be damned to give us information on our main antagonist directly in the game instead of in a post-credit LOG?

Like okay. I love my baby boy emil. He is the most special boy in the world to me and I am so happy seeing him get a pretty decent character arc for himself in the sequel to his original iteration. But why do we learn information about Emil more easily than the Red Girls? No unit data paragraph, no document information to read, no external book needing to be sourced. You learn whats up with him, why his big event out in the desert happens, and how it ends. You even get TWO special areas involving him. Red Girl gets to speak for a little bit and then vanish. It just astonishes me a bit

And it's not like the game doesn't try to expand characters last-minute either, that entire cutscene where Pascal reads Nietszche and then gets surrounded by the baby machines before the events of the Factory/suicide felt so forced in suddenly that it felt rather obvious something was going to happen. And I say this as someone who was in tears seeing Pascal get called ''uncle Pascal'' and see him defend the children in the factory --- it was super obvious that they possibly didn't originally plan that scene but needed something to really show that Village acted just like a human community with children and babysitters and family. Like not to be like ''this couldve been something beautiful'' but i think giving us a little time between A2 and the Village more could've done something beautiful. A2 getting the necessities to build the slide definitely made me drop to my knees but I noticed even the LPer was confused why A2 had a crying child inside of her as her enemy at the end of the hacking (like how 9S had 2B at the end of his destroying his memories), but the game didn't do anything with that besides lightly imply A2 lets down her mean bit for children sometimes (and again. why is this Kaine behavior). And then the fucking laughing children sound at the end of the route where she hacks 9S and she looks to the sky like ? This is all very interesting but it doesnt mean anything.

NOT TO MENTION 2B BEING AN EXECUTIONER TYPE. COOL CONCEPT BUT IT DOESNT MEAN ANYTHING IN THE END. It's just another thing to tack onto 9S's migraine of learning everything is a lie but nothing gets DONE with that incredibly interesting though afterwards because we never see 2B after that because she's been dead for a while now. We had a brief hint at it when we heard that transmission of 2B being her new name but the payoff just doesn't work if you just state it and then not do anything with it.

There's many cases of this and I notice it with how much questions I have that simply have no answer in this game despite the fact we have nearly 5 routes worth of time that could've gone into either sticking to like 3 ideas to the end or bridging the gaps, Which the story Does Do Sometimes! Red Girl talking about fucking up its own network to make pacifistic machines that want nothing to do with the war, the lie of YoRHA

OH MY GOD ALSO. SPEAKING OF RANDOMLY PUSHING STUFF IN. OPERATOR 210. The fact that they wanted to pull the whole ''she was curt and distant with 9S but secretly saw him as like a son because she wanted a family :(" could've gone INSANE if they didn't decide they wanted to bring that idea in at the last possible second and make 210 randomly baby 9S (and then make him point out how strange she's acting), and then ignore that until we get to the cutscene that they wanted to make for it. Like they could've had 210 start out as curt and distant, but as 9S operations with 2B got more dangerous she could've started laying on the doting mother thing, but it just came so abruptly in Route.....C? That it felt forced and rather last-minute, like they finished writing A and B and someone walked in and went ''wait I want 210 to see 9S as her son :(" and this is how they crammed it in

oh this post isnt even about the pacing i'm just talking about dead end plot concepts. But I can definitely see where you're coming from there because we spent an awfully long time with the Resistance only to know so little about them, but it defos felt more ''a lot of stuff is getting brought up but we dont have enough time to give it developing room because we want to bring in the next concept asap". A2, the forest king, Red Girl, hell even Pascal and Adam & Eve all suffer this. the only person who really got a steady character Was 2B and 9S but 2B felt like she got cut short and just became a puppet for 9S' plot which is so tiring how often we get dual man/woman protags and the woman's story just becomes part of the man's story and she becomes a nebulous concept. that yoko taro brand Misogyny

I SPENT AN HOUR TYPING THIS? I haven't even gotten to how I feel like 9S' plot feels like it was destined for something more but got bottlenecked for time and cut off at the like 80% mark

I can definitely feel that though of feeling like Nier:a didn't meet expectations, when I finished all the routes and the playlist i was watching just Ended I genuinely sat up and bed and just felt a deep sense of ''THAT'S IT? THATS ALL?"

it's crazy too because I really, REALLY loved what it had going and im going to be thinking about this game forever but it also just left me feeling like i'm missing something so badly that when I try to think about it sometimes my mind just draws blanks like im left speechless at it.

Like that was nier: automata? that was just 40 hours of being asked what it means to be alive

[calpalsworld]

So the behind the scenes for Pizza Tower is literally the worst. The creator is literally the worst. If i was in the same room as someone like this I would probably become a killer. Other fans have already said their opinions, basically "I get why people like the game but I can't engage with it anymore" etc. That's pretty much how I'm feeling. I feel disgusted and betrayed and it hurts to remember something I like about the game, and then remember it was made by these dangerous people. Maybe at some point if I do get the urge to draw the characters again, maybe I'll put a huge DNI banner that says "fuck bigots die mcpig" or something. But I need a bit to think about if thats a good decision or not... I feel like its not... On one hand I want to say "I'm gonna take the good parts of this game and make it what the creator hates" but I also have no clue if thats a good idea, and I need a while to think about it.

One BIG THING I'm asking of everyone, and I may make another post asking this question later, is does anyone know any Pizza Tower alternatives??? Any media that is cartoony and simple and crazy and well animated? I really wish I could find something that had the things I liked in Pizza Tower. Please comment or send me an ask if you have any suggestions.

Anyway heres some PERSONAL thoughts that are NOT as important:

I feel disappointed in myself for noticing problematic character designs from the start and convincing myself that maybe the bigotry was unintentional, that it was just a negative side effect of being inspired by other (bigoted) things. It was obviously not. I should've known it was intentional.

A lot of people have been saying "Pizza Tower being problematic was obvious due to the art style," which is partially true, but at the same time that makes me really sad. My first exposure to the game was my friend saying "this looks like something you would make!" And I've been fucking obsessed with the art style ever since. For those who don't know, I used to be an exclusively "shitpost" artist, which I REALLY enjoyed, and art college has made me more and more corporate. So sadly.... Pizza Tower made me feel connected to how I used to draw and create art. I was really happy to see such a creative and unconventional art style that is like my own thriving with popularity, and I liked to imagine that maybe the creator was similar to me (he is not). Lately I've started saying "I'm not gonna make sanitized art anymore I'm gonna only make crazy stuff" and yeah that was literally because of... Pizza Tower.... which has been revealed to be made by the worst people ever.... (so yeah lmk if you guys have any recommended alternatives).

Last thing is I think it has been cool how Peppino has become an iconic ass trans-headcanoned character for a lot of tumblr. So I guess thats the reason why I most likely won't judge anyone for drawing Pizza Tower. We got something awesome going that was our own thing. But you have to remember McPig is also a racist, and trans headcanons don't do anything to fight against that.

I just hope the people who will continue to draw art to spite McPig's intentions openly acknowledge how fucked up the game's creation is, and don't promote the game. If you continue being a Pizza Tower fan please at least be self-aware and adamantly against the creator. Like post a link to pirate the game along with every time you post art of it or something to counteract your inherent promotion of the game, idk. Don't let bigots get away with being popular. That is dangerous.

TLDR:;

No more Pizza Tower for me, at least for a while, if I do ever post something Pizza Tower-related again it will be staunchly anti-Pizza Tower. Someday, I hope to create something like fun and silly like Pizza Tower, but antifascist. Also, new hyperfixation recommendations that are similar to Pizza Tower strongly encouraged, thank you!

[reanimationstation]

Saw your reblog about misogynism & people not liking female characters and I'm agreed w Adrienne saving the day with Bendy female characters

Rose and Constance are great protagonist

Dot is AWESOME deuteragonist and even with being created as Buddy's supporting character she's *equal*. She's not "plain girl for male protagonist" type of deal

Abby Lambert is so good. People barely talk about her bc she's more interesting in TIOL and it's Joey book but i ADORE her even with little time in books that she has

In vanilla Bendy games i really love Twisted Alice/Susie Campbell but i should note that she deserved more focus (only in my opinion)

+possibly less "woman hates another woman for being fired" (it looks to me like they lowkey dropped it but. It was kinda here in ch3)

I'm all for women who are far too gone but can still have sympathetic angle. I do feel like devs suffer with reflecting it in writing tho

Audrey is good enough (would appreciate better writing at places but yk). I'm biased because i have hyperfix on her lol. Idk i love her little character moments and Erin did great job at changing tones when it was needed. If Adrienne got her even as side character in some book, she'd greatly benefit from it.

Allison Angel is more enjoyable in DR (to me) but she's more developed in fanon

Allison Pendle on the other hand. . . Erm. I wish she was more than Alice's second VA if you get me

Anyway I love women in Bendy👍 Bendy's funny deal is that a lot of characters suffer from lack of development and they're not only female. *Stares at certain male characters*

YES YES YES TO ALL OF THIS.

all the girls in the books are fantastic and are genuinely such charming characters. they're well written CHARACTERS and i feel like sometimes people forget that writing a women is writing a PERSON but Kress never really does that and i appreciate her so much for it.

i need to appreciate Abby more i love her dearly i just don't think about her much. she's so good, i wish we got more of her but i get that it's Joey's book.

MALICE/SUSIE HAS SO MUCH POTENTIAL AND SHE DESERVES BETTER WRITING. i love her so much but gosh her writing could be better. especially in batdr like queen im so glad you're here but what ARE you doing here. can we get more of your character struggles, a little insight into how thats going maybe?? and yeah the hating another woman cause she was fired is a bit touch and go but i feel like with the right writers they could make it work. they unfortunately do not seem like theyre trying to do that

i do love Audrey i just have problems with some of the batdr writing. like how she kinda just goes along with whatever opinion she needs to have to move the plot along and at times i was like WHY ARE YOU SIDING WITH HIM/DOING THIS but thats not her fault. she has her good character moments and yeah Erin did a fantastic job voicing her. and she would REALLY benefit from being written by Kress, you're right. a lot of the characters would (cough susie cough)

ill be so real i barely remember any Allison Angel moments in either game IM SORRY THEY JUST DONT STAND OUT IN MY BRAIN </3 i do agree that shes better in batdr tho

ALLISON PENDLE THO. she needs more screentime in the books outside of being Very Pretty and Kind.

‼️SLIGHT FADE TO BLACK SPOILER‼️

in FTB though i really REALLY liked her characterization, with how she was tired of being expected to be the entertainment when she's a guest. it felt realistic, and makes sense with what little else we know about her. I need more private moments with her, ones where she isnt putting up a mask to perform, because only then we'll see what she's really like. and shes SO sweet with Rose, i really adore thar scene in general.

SPOILERS OVER

BUT YEAH WOMEN IN BENDY MY BELOVED. I think a lot of it is that most of them come from the books, and Adrienne is REALLY GOOD AT WRITING COMPELLING CHARACTERS. everyone she got to write for got an improvement in their characterization, not just the women. some of the male characters desperately needed it. anyways put more well written ladies in the games challenge

[kedreeva]

Hello fucker im the anon losing my absolute marbles about godfuckingdamned stranger things

Not only are you apparently not going alone to hell and have fucking grabbed me and decided to take me along with you you fuck but i feel as though i was plucked out the 3 story window of my fucking flat and shoved inti the metaphorical backseat of the fucking zamboni machine heading straight for hells fiery gates WHILE I WAS MERELY TRYING TO WET MY NIN EXISTENT FLOWERS ON THE WINDOW SEAL

Having said that i can absolutely fucking tell that the characters themselves are holding the fucking thing together and it would work eith absolutely nonsensical plot SINCE I KNOW ALMOST NONE OF THE PLOT (UNFORTUNATELY I DO KNOW A BIT NOW SINCE IVE BEEN CONSUMING THE FUCKING FICS OF THIS FANDOM LIKE A MANIAC FOR THE PAST 2 DAYS) AND IM STILL LOSING MY SHIT OVER THEM

I have also fucking decided to start watching the fucking thing right fucking now even though im so fucking behind on several deadlines and assignments including a very important one thats due right thia fuckinh week and for which i have yet to write ANYTHING and which has to be about 80 fucking pages long by the end of it so yes i am truly having the fucking time of my life goddamn it i was gonna start watching the fucking thing literally last night but i fell fucking asleep at about 2am because of the all nighter i had pulled the previous night reading the fucking steddie fics and last night i fell asleep woth my fucking phone in my hand doing guess fucking what READING ON AO3 ONCE AGAIN

I literally only vaguely know how steve and eddie look and dustin a little bit and robin a little bit and thats IT but goddamn do i have strong feelings for like 9 characters i know fuckall about except for fanon

As for the goddamn fic that made me lose the last of my sanity it wasnt even a Proper h/c per se just had some h/c in it which was game enough for my tired ass to deem it a h/c fic in my exvaustion and insanity and i do NOT unfortunately remember the name of it but i do know that it was by a fellow whose usernmae is pukner which i somehow remember and it was about 40k long amd what fucking made me read it and LOSE it and i mean LOSE IT like fucking LOSE IT was that it had NONBINARY steve kedreeva it had fucking NONBINARY STEVE so yeah i truly have given uo all of my 2 drops of remaining sanity for the smallest possible little bit of serotonin i could possibly receive

KEDREEVA ITS GOTTEN SO FUCKING BAD I ENDED UP HAVING TO DITCH MY HANDMADE HANDPICKED SPOTIFY PLAYLIST FOR MY LAST FUCKING HYPERFIXATION EARLIER AND FUCKING LOOKING UP A STEDDIE PLAYLIST IM LOSING IT THAT BADLY

I blame you SO hard for everything you are literally never gonna stop hearing from me about this you shall deal with every single mental breakdown and Thought™ that i have because of stranger things from now on because youre the reason why im in this shitshow in the first place my fucking friends and acquaintances and EVERYONE both online AND IRL have been trying to get me to watch stranger things EVER SINCE IT FIRST CAME OUT and _THIS_ is what fucking does me in

Well, I found the fic in question, and a) there's more than one NB Steve written by this person and also they're on tumblr by the same name

and b) Hey....... anyone out there got some nonbinary steve harrington fics to rec? bonus if they're hurt/comfort fics apparently. If I'm going to be blamed, I'm gonna fuckin EARN IT :D Drop 'em in the replies or reblogs or askbox, happy to reblog tumblr links too.

c) heyyyy drop your Steddie playlists for anon let's make it worse as a FAMILY

[diodellet]

ooohh that ask game has some interesting questions hmm how abt 16, 18, and 23?

i am realizing just how much this ask game is making me bare my soul goshhh (/not srs), thanks for sending me an ask, bibi!

16. What makes you immediately close a fic that otherwise seemed good?

hm...well, most of the time i try to stick it out even if i'm not enjoying the fic from the first few sentences. like, maybe it's just me but a lot of the first words of a fic tends to be the (for lack of a better word) "the gunk" that precedes the actual story? like some stories just have slow starts, but they do get gud.

but to answer the q, i guess stuff that makes me roll my eyes at a fic, in the context of x readers would probably have to be:

disclaimer: most of the time, i don't mind reading these. but there are just moments where they bother me as i'm reading

reader getting carried bridal style (i dont like it, i hate it. id rather be carried like a sack of potatoes. or id rather be carried like a goat by its shepherd. but i do like seeing characters getting princess-carried) just carry me like this instead 🤧🤧👇

royalty AU++CEO/office/corporate-setting AU (like secret princess of a kingdom or being a secretary, for example) i'm not a big fan of those kinds of settings. like ok sure a chara can look good in business formal or in some fine furs, but once the eye candy wears off thats when i exit the fic oops.

fics centered around marriage: i don't really enjoy reading proposals. also thinking of how the rings, the dresses, and the flowers look is hard bcs of my (partial?) aphantasia, but weddings Are Pretty Fun as a background setting. overall, i think what bothers me most is that the chara loses a bit of their personality after they get wed together with the reader.

^^actually in relation to this... im not that big of a fan of prom/dance settings, they both read very similarly, especially since the reader tends to be placed in the more passive role of being asked out. (but when you make it angsty or hurt/comfort, ok i will read it i'm a simple girl)

Oh and ig this is just me wishing for more in the Imposter-SAGAU genre of fanfic (i mean i'm still looking around, i don't feel desperate enough to write smth of my own), but i kinda wish the charas weren't so doe-eyed and quick to apologize to the reader. like, i get the feeling of wanting to write The Good Bits Immediately (e.g. being fawned over, getting to lord that blunder over the characters) but the potential of slowburn trauma recovery and developing a relationship from straight-up antagonism is Right There.

18. What media do you want to get into because of artists/writers you like?

i think i'd want to try reading more poetry? like, if i rb a lot of web weaving, i gotta know sumn other than "deep" pop lyrics (u wont find me saying nice things about ms sw*ft). so far i'm thinking of starting with ocean vuong and richard siken (basic ik but i mean, their works are good)

dunmeshi! i've been putting it off for forever 🙈🙈 (<-girlie watched frieren and forgor abt dunmeshi bcs they got yorushika to do the 2nd OP) but senshi,,,, SENSHI THE MAN THAT U ARE,,,,

Oh! and i'm rlly curious about alien stage! my sibling's dipping into it and he told me it was basically america's got talent x the promised neverland. and he said the magic words "toxic yaoi" and "doomed yuri," i Gotta watch it atp. (also like, carole and tuesday rearranged my brain, im ready to put a sadder spin on it😤)

23. What would you make a 5 hour video essay on, if you had enough time and motivation?

as soon as i read this all my hyperfixations have: left the server HAHAHA

maybe in terms of recent ones, i could try analyzing madds buckley's my love is sick. i wrote about that album for a final paper in a basic music elective, but i was constrained to only 3 pages so i only talked about 2-3 songs. but i could pretend to be a music major and regale ppl with how the leitmotifs tie together and completely destroy me add a new layer of meaning to the songs on subsequent listens. Also like, these songs just Get It (not sure what "it" is exactly, but there's smth related to first love and love lost*)

(but atm im just yoinking songs from there to use for fic/chapter titles, i plan on using one for this ruggie timeloop angst fic im plotting out anyway)

(art appreciation ask questions, please bug me to rb some underrated art and fic)

[bucking-mustangs-with-wings]

For the ask game 1 & 20?

1 (which of your fics would you keep the basic plot of but rewrite completely): I don't think there's any of my current fics that I would rewrite, I'm happy with what I've written for all of them and wouldn't change them for anything. When I write I write until I'm happy and then that's what I post. I don't write a fic and then post it to get it out there as soon as possible, thats why some chapters or fics take a lot longer than others (*cough* chapter three of GoS *cough*) because I make sure I'M happy with them and get them to a point where I feel they don't need changing before I post or publish on ao3 or here. PAST fics from years ago, however... I know that today's me would definitely. It's a good thing I can't find or access them hahaha

20 (Do you work on a single project or many at the same time?): THIS question. Hoooo boy, this question. If you've been following me or seeing the posts I make, you KNOW that I'm an AU fiend, my brain just spits them out left right and center and I don't regret them at all, but it's like having several toddlers all vying for my attention at once screaming WRITE ME WRITE ME and then I just get overwhelmed. So I will make mood-boards, soundtracks on spotify etc to keep the premises of the things I want to write at the forefront, all of them I will get to, but I force myself to stay on target with only ONE fic at a time. Fics themselves make me spiral into a hyperfixation and I know if I give my energy even slightly to another (writing-wise) I will forget about the previous or leave it on the backburner. At the moment with Game of Survival chapter three, albeit I'm struggling to write anything right now because of some life circumstances, I've been giving all of my energy with writing to it alone. I have others I want to write and will, but I need to focus on GoS so it actually gets done. Once that is, I'll put more of my creative energy into the others (I'm SO excited to start by Skater!Buck & CollegeProfessor!Bucky au)

[gogomeaty]

Tag game: 10 facts about you!!

Rules: Share 10 facts about yourself and tag other blogs! I want to get to know my mutuals, and the people I follow a little bit :) The facts can be about anything!

☆ Tagged by: @ir0n-moon, thank you!! ( ´ ∀`)/

I think I'm a really philosophical person, especially with my special interest, because almost every time they kinda show in my life before they become my special interests or hyperfixations. I usually call those moments premonitions idk, like when before Monty become my comfort character last year I had a dream with a baby alligator or how i remember hearing Skwisgaar solo when I was younger but i dont remember have ever seen it in tv so yeah, probably is dumb but I really like connecting my special interests/hyperfixations with the past and then I notice they kinda been around me all the time just waiting for the moment of me knowing about them. I also use them to remember parts of my life because if I remember I was obsessed with homestuck then it was when I was in high school bc I don't have a really good memory by years.

I love collecting nature stuff: i have leafs, rocks, feathers, acorns, dead insects, an old honeycomb and two pinecones because here is rare to find them so they're special to me. I also collect crystals and anime mangas. <:

Winter is my favorite season and when is beginning to be cold I feel like i reborn, idk how to explain the sensation but it feels good I guess is because i was born in November.

I love dancing and laughing, since i was little I was always dancing and taking everyone out to dance and i was a very giggly baby and now whenever i laugh it just make me instantly happy.

When you first met me irl I'm very serious and i usually don't speak that much but once i gain trust i speak a lot and im very loud lmao.

I also really like singing im pretty decent at it according to the theater teacher i had in uni lol

Usually im a very sensitive person but not exactly with the stuff i should be sensitive about idk, I can't never cry at funerals or stuff like that but if I see something sad about my special interests im all tears. It makes me laugh a lil bit because at those moments im crying but im always start to laugh at the same time. (｡-ω-)

I have the sense of style of a little kid because i only use graphic t-shirts and shorts or jeans, If I had money to buy clothes from the aesthetic i like i probably would dress like this: but i can't find long skirt like that for plus size ppl and thats other reason i dont dress like that lol

Savory food is my favorite usually im not a sweet tooth person unless is about apple pie or oreo milkshake, and I love milanesas con papas, pozole and chicken tenders.

Accents are so catchy and I can imitate them pretty good its the autism lol.

God I think it would be easier but this took me long time because i was not sure what to share jsjskak

Tagging (no pressure): @robinsnest2111 @nsfwitchy @atomic-jellyfish @a-dope-fiend @skyhunterriff @mr-nauseam @dicksoutformtl and whoever else who wants to do it :3c

[ruthlesslistener]

My dash put your rb about tragedies next to an Infinity Train post so now I'm curious - have you watched IT? What cartoons do you watch or would you recommend?

Zero idea what Infinity Train is, and the answer to your questions about cartoons is that I pretty much don't watch them at all. The last one I watched was Centaurworld, which I only did on a whim because of some really close friends, and haven't touched any since- before that, it was Devilman Crybaby (which is a fucking amazing tragedy but is also rife with gore, body horror, sex, rape, etc). And that's pretty much it. I don't watch movies, either- the last one I've watched was Promare. The only TV I can really sit through are vet shows or nature documentaries; otherwise I have to get into media through reading or gaming.

I find that cartoons/movies tend to be either too much work for me to sit through or too overwhelming sensory-wise or emotionally-wise for me to deal with. That isn't to say that they're a bad thing, but experiencing a rush of overwhelmingly positive emotions is still an overwhelming rush of emotions for me to deal with. I used to watch anime in high school, but that was primarily because I was suicidally depressed and greatly understimulated, so it was the only thing that could get me to feel something, as well as the only method I had to engage with other people. Now that I'm out of that environment, in university, and living on my own, it's just too much all at once. I can't deal with the rush of visual and emotional input it gives me, and I don't have the time in the day to waste to deal with me hyperfixating on something so intensely.

Plus I can actually play video games now- which were banned in my household til I was 17- and I've found that video games tend to work better for me atm for portioning out story content because instead of me passively absorbing everything all at once, I have to work through it myself. I'm an extremely fast reader, so I burn through books like a hot knife through butter, but games force me to slow down because they tire me out way quicker than a book would, and its easier for me to stop playing a game and pick it back up again than it is for me to pause during a show. Doesn't give me neural whiplash as much.

Tbh, me disliking cartoons/movies probably because I was raised in a household where I wasn't allowed to watch tv at all unless it was either rated G- so anything disney or with a 7 or under rating- or 'educational', like nature documentaries (but even those were heavily limited- can't let the kid see anything with blood or sex in it! Even if its animals!). AND because nothing I liked to watch was 'child appropriate' or upsetting to others- I distinctly remember my mom telling me that she was always disturbed by the stuff I liked to watch because it was all sad, like Fox and the Hound or Happy Feet- reading was the only outlet I could get away with. So I just never learned how to engage with that form of content in a way that works with my adhd/autistic brain, and is now too exhausting for me to bother with.

(also i tend to find american cartoon styles to be super fucking ugly so i have no desire to watch them at all. centaurworld got a pass simply bc they were so creative with their art styles and how it works into the themes that i enjoyed it, but thats because i can pretty much always enjoy something i'd otherwise fucking despise if its done well enough, since its the artistry of it that i'm interested in. but being picky about artstyles also drastically cuts down on what i like to watch)

[ccbeeduo]

has someone asked u about soothalo for the askgame yet,,,,

NOT YET NO GRINS SO WIDE AT YOU

What made you ship it?: WELL. i think i had heard that q!Wilbur was supposed to be q!BBH's egg partner when i was SUPER hyperfixated on the two so i naturally just became absolutely insane about it What are your favourite things about the ship?: UHHGH i dont really havea lot to say specifically because wilbur never fucking logs on and they dont interact very much but i REALLy like their conflicting energies especially in wil's last qsmp stream. Wilbur being so excited to be back on the island and bbh like yeah. Everything sucks right now actually (albeit subtly) and i think thats really funny actually Is there an unpopular opinion you have about your ship?: The ship itself is an unpopular opinion i'm like the only one here

(ASK GAME ASK GAME ASK GAME)