#and thats a good album but i like to be contrary

[corvidcall]

Hi corv! What's your favorite los campesinos! album?

this is difficult because i think most of their albums are comparable (although i think most LC! fans disagree. but my love is more pure because i like all of it and have no taste)

if you've never listened to them and wanted a place to start, I would recommend Hello Sadness, because i think it has the greatest number of iconic bangers

Hold On Now, Youngster is probably the album ive listened to the most, but since thats their first album and i was introduced to the band in 2009, thats not a fair metric i think. ive had the most time to listen to it!!! .... but it IS really good imo

[romanthroughthefield]

okay so it wasn’t my next post but whatever-

Why Something To Believe In is Actually a Good Song (Contrary to Popular Belief):

disclaimer: i’m not a media analyst or whatever i’m just a person with an opinion (and the delusional idea that i know jack kelly better than anyone)

1. first things first i genuinely think that alan menken is a genius composer. how could i not? he has created some of the most influential scores in modern day cinema. regardless of your opinion on the song place in newsies i think that looking at the chord progression, lyrics, and instrumentals you have to admit that it is a nice song to listen to.

2. addressing some issues people have with jatherine i think a lot of the issues people have with this song come from the pre-conceived notion that their relationship was “rushed” or built on “jack being a creep” which i simply just don’t agree with. possibly a side tangent but don’t come a knockin’ doesn’t make jack out to be a creep it simply states that he participates in hookup culture. a line in which he literally laughs while singing. jack and katherine have a very flirty and joking relationship up until this point and not once did i read into this as katherine being uncomfortable. jack finds katherine as an equal, a match for his wit and humor. this is the first girl he’s ever felt a deeper connection with. he is literally in disbelief that a “girl like her could ever wind up with a guy like him.” the song only further deepens their relationship. they state that the love that they have discovered here is new for them. it doesn’t mean that their madly in love, i mean they’re teenagers, it just means that they love each other and what they brought into each others lives. it’s “rushed” if you people that this song is a confession of deep love which i simply just don’t think it is.

4. a deeper look into what believing means “jack already had something to believe in! he had the newsies” “katherine had herself and her career.” people like to deny it but jack didn’t like his life before the strike. it wasn’t because of the newsies of course but can you really think that stealing food and clothes for the boys he cares about in the lodging house was his endgame for him? that’s why he had santa fe, so he could dream. his “something to believe in” was a dream not a reality.

when katherine comes along that is his first tether to reality. they can change the way new york is run. this doesn’t have to be his life anymore. now his “something to believe in” was a reality in front of him not just a dream that would save his crushing reality of not being able to care for his boys properly.

same thing goes for katherine in the sense that her career was finally “busting out of the social pages” until she immediately got shot down. her father’s pressure was not her end goal, she wanted to make a career for herself but was denied it. when jack arrives and she finally gets a story to run with and the courage to change the way that new york is run she discovers her “something to believe in.” jack and katherine each awaken something in each other, they each believe in each other. i mean that is literally said in the song but it goes deeper than just their love for each other, they literally have changed each others lives.

4. from a composers point of view: something to believe in gets no hints/preludes/reprises/playoffs or anything of the sort which the entire rest of the album does (except thats rich im pretty sure but thats completely different). point is any number that jack or katherine sing in up to this point has either already been lamented again or will be in the future. something to believe in stands alone in its present, it is literally the time frane that jack wishes he could freeze. it is a singular moment in which their unique situations come together. before they kiss in the song jack ends his longer phrases with a stagnant note. after his kisses her the notes at the ends of his phrases climb up. from a strictly technical point of view he literally rises up because of katherine believing in him.

idk i didn’t proof read this let me know if it makes sense

[shelfthe-reader]

alright cabinet, if the only musicals i've watched are spring awakening, dear evan hansen, hamilton, and the percy jackson musical, where should I start?

So I’m not the BIGGEST slime tutorial (iykyk) person so I have NO CLUE the best links for those but here are my favorite movie-musicals you can find on Streaming

Disney+

Newsies (1992)

Newsies (2017) These two would help you understand some of my reblogs lmao

Hamilton

Into the Woods (contrary to popular belief, it’s not as bad as it could have been, and this is the only role James Corden has EVER been decent in)

West Side Story (one of my all-time favorites; I love this version more than the OG)

MAX

In The Heights

Singin In The Rain

Mamma Mia

The Color Purple (2023)

Hulu

Mamma Mia/Here We Go Again

The Color Purple (2023)

As for cast albums, here’s a playlist of the “official” opening songs to all of MY favorites (this IS NOT a finished playlist, especially since people keep dropping cast albums) (you will NEVER see Phantom or Les Mis or Chicago etc etc on here) (But again, this is an ever-evolving playlist on opening numbers so who knows)

Right now, the albums I have on repeat (Note: NOT the same as favorites) are Hell’s Kitchen, The Outsiders, Suffs, 35MM, Bonnie & Clyde, Water for Elephants, and Almost Famous

My ABSOLUTE FAVORITES are Come From Away, Newsies, The Outsiders, West Side Story, RENT, Parade, and & Juliet (as of Monday July 1st)

The Shows I’ve Seen on Broadway (in order)

School of Rock

Come From Away

Hadestown

Six

Paradise Square

& Juliet

Aladdin (music is Menken so thats all it had going for it lmao) (Michael you were great tho)

Parade

The Outsiders

The Heart of Rock and Roll (music was good, plot was out of pocket)

National Tours

Six

Anastasia

College Theter

Newsies

Rent

Into the Woods

Community Theater

Anastasia

Newsies

Beauty and the Beast

Bye Bye Birdie

Aladdin Jr.

School Musicals

Godspell

The Sound of Music

Newsies

Frozen Jr

Shrek Jr

And I was in Tuck Everlasting (Youth Edition) so that’s fun too

I think I’ve covered all my bases so if you have ANY QUESTIONS please ask me also if you want to do like a listening party for any of these I wouldn’t say no lmao

[absurdly-overpowered-astronaut]

top five non english songs go

Ughuhu just five? So hard :< To narrow it down/make it easier on myself I’m excluding milgram and limiting myself to one harumakigohan song because otherwise those would just be the whole list

5 - Nobody Makes Sense / ぼくらはみんな意味不明

This is a rather recent favourite but I absolutely adore it because I think it does just such a great job at conveying its message? It spends the majority of the time talking about how the world is arbitrary and hence pointless. Why try in a world where nothing matters because everything is arbitrary. “a cats name is tama, but I couldn’t tell you why” but then at the end it contradicts and answers that argument things aren’t arbitrary and even if they humans find meaning in them they do things that seem silly and meaningless like folding cranes or skipping parts of zebra crossings but they bring joy even if they seem meaningless. I love how the song words its message and loops it back round at the end but the message also means alot to me. Its a message thats resonates with me alot and which I often find myself forgetting so I come back to this song alot to remind myself and to just listen it in general because it sounds so good! The art for the album of zero-go and of the pv is also just incredible.

4 - os-alien / Os-宇宙人

I absolutely adore the lyrics for this song! Like I love all the lyrics of all these songs but like this one especially is just very relatable to me. I also really like how the instrumental compliments the vocal style and tone of the song but unfortunately it’s the op for an incest anime that is really bad but my brain had already lacked on it and it was too late! I just pretend the songs about autism <3

3 - additional memory

Ayano is one of my favourite characters of all time so this song is one of my favourites of all time. The imagery and symbolism especially the mentions of the final call/end credits and how the song is tuned and the little instrumental bit where everything just intensifies I love it all so much ごめんね、大好きだよ -> さよなら、大好きだよ :’) AND WHAT IT SAYS ABOUT AYANO AS A CHARACTER AND HOW IT MAKES ME WANT TO BALL MY EYES OUT EVERY TIME I HEAR IT! Love! love! love so much

2 - I’m like myself/As myself/自分らしく

Gender is weird and this song resonates with my experience with it in a way that nothing else really has. I also just really like how shinsei kamattechan does their vocals especially the songs around the middle of their discography. I really like the tone of the song “people’s harsh looks are a bit painful” / “people say you should live as a man or a woman but I can’t do this” / “I want to be like him but also her like a human even though hated” Its kinda simple but in a good way

1 - 3rd heart

Contrary to what my blog might lead you to believe mirage isn’t my whole personality the 3rd heart is my whole personality and reason for being. IT IS MY FAVOURITE SONG EVER EVER OF ALL TIME! Especially harumakigohan’s self cover of it but also the vocaloid cover is just incredible I love how harumakigohan tunes and how he writes his instrumentals and music and draws his mv’s. THE MV FOR 3RD HEART MAKES ME WANT TO EXPLODE. I know I keep talking about the lyrics being parts I love but the lyrics of 3rd heart and perfect and beautiful and I love themmmmm so much ahghggh. To get personal I relate to this song and mikage alot and this song is very special to me because of that.

.the song is about autism to me

I want to frame every single shot and put it on my wall! I want to eat the instrumental!I want to give mikage a hug! I want to one day to be able to create art/stories and string together words as beautiful as this

AFGHFHGGHJBJHJHJHJHJHHIIHHI

Thank you for the asks and for reading my unhinged ramblings ^^;

[filthforfriends]

Hi! So, maybe not the band itself, but the fanclub said the staff (I'm assuming - Ma's staff) asked them to help stop spreading the cover, and Sony deleted that tweet, so I think it would be nice if you could delete/save that post for later 😅

I totally understand this position and I actually thought about it a lot before posting so here's my take. The band are too relevant for this to go away even if fans delete the image because the media already will have a hold of it and can just get the image from each others websites. So if thats going to happen anyways, why shouldn't people that celebrate the band bring positivity to it use the album cover. It creates more hype for the single and the band is at a point where they've spent this past year, hundreds or hours, meticulously building momentum. You could hear and see at Global Citizen and the Genius Interview that they're fucking tired. If the single does really well they could permanently break into the American market.

The way Damiano talks about haters you can hear that he subscribes to the "all press is good press idea." Like the controversy of this is going to make the single do better, especially because its coming out so soon people will still be interested. So if the image is already out there being spread and bringing attention to Maneskin, and the band hasn't said anything to the contrary, why shouldn't we help boost the single? I'm not saying the leak doesn't suck and wasn't disrespectful to the band. Someone should be fired.But what's done is done so all we can do is follow the bands lead. Right now, instead of asking people not to post the cover they've released three more images from the campaign for the single.

I don't mean to sound like a dick but we heard from the fan club that they heard from staff that may or may not Maneskin's staff who may or may not share the opinion of the band is a little too vague for me. If he band makes that call, the image is gone and I'll apologize. But for now I think we should get as much attention, as much hype, as many eyes on this single as possible so it has the best chance of success since its out next month. You could even argue that the leak is a blessing in disguise because now people who didn't even know that band before have an opinion.

You don't have to agree with me at all and should act according to what you think is ethical in this situation. I don't want people to think I posted the album cover without careful consideration. Considering the band hasn't said anything, I hope that we can reserve judging each other's character until they actually don't condone reposting. I'm not going to argue with anyone. Thank you to this anon for being neutral and gracious with their words I really appreciate it and I hope I did the same in response.

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

ah yeah, i think quarentine has given people some opportunity to actually just sit with the person they are, rather than be rushing around for the person they want to become. its good you got smth good out of isolation! ah thats great! hope you had fun and ur partner in crime speeds back home so you can get out more hehe.

ah yeah ty, good suggestions.

hmm good point, i was sort of putting it separate to the whole not-sexualising thing, but yeah. mmm yeah i totally agree, some of the enhypen fics/imagines *shudder* and even reading innie stuff is just a bit *icky* cos everyone still thinks of him as our agi ppang. yeah def would be good but sadly this just seems to be the world we live in. :(

ah yes the holy masterlist (not sarc) i have actually read in the rain and gladius maximus before, but ill go look for in class! oooh thats good! character development lol. hmmmm yes champagne problems was the angst to end all angst, that shit hurt. it was actually one of the first of your fics i read and i recall almost crying over the whole thing, it was so heartbreaking, i can see how it almost made you want to drop angst. good that youve allowed yourself some lee-way tho :)

hehe thats so cool. okay here we go, ill try not to be mortally offended (/hj)

cheese - yes same, i liked it but that was all there was, it wasnt a super standout track. it was rlly underwhelming for me but some of the hook is super catchy so there is Redemption (tm) in store for cheese maybe

thunderous - mmm, yeah at first i totally agreed, i think they suffer from too much good music syndrome, that all their other tracks are such fucking bops its hard to stay at that level of perfection. the choreo was beautiful tho and tbh, the track has grown on me since ive been watching all the vids abt it. its my brothers favourite track

domino - YES GODAMMIT IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE TITLE TRACK. the raps, the vocals, the vibes, the fucking domino sound in the back? i would have streamed that shit on repeat. but tbh, as good as it is, it doesnt have that sort of grandness/oomph that skz seems to like in their title tracks so i can see why they chose thunderous (tho domino would have been so good) *sigh*

ssick - yeah same, not my fave track by a long mile, the crowd cheering was a ?strange? choice and the chorus was a bit bare/empty, plus like i mentioned earlier, it was kinda funny to me for some reason but ill still play it if im playing thru the whole album

the view - ahh one of those not like other girls (/j) i honestly think its just a good party song, just a bop to play in the background when nobodys rlly paying much attention. its pretty generic pop music but catchy

sorry, i love you - hehe yeah i thought it was going to be sadder as well, but i rlly loved the fact that they all just got to sing, which almost never happens, i dont think ive heard felix sing for a long time, so i enjoyed it. wasnt rlly a standout track but i just casually like it. looking forward to the fic haha

silent cry - this song i swear, some bits are rlly good and then others are just? why?? it does sound like a dance song tho idk. definitely not one of my faves either

secret secret - YES its so good! its such a chill song and i love their vocals in it. the combination of lo-fi/fake strings backup stuff and their heavenly vocals just makes it *chefs kiss* im listening to it rn and just... its so beautiful. it gives me pumped up another day vibes ya know? like my pace is edgy get cool, this one is energetic another day i feel like. overall i love it

STAR LOST - ah thats so cool! i didnt know that! on first listen this song had a similar vibe to secret secret but then the beat came in and ahh its such a good song. i can totally imagine them putting this song to a concert footage vid, this song is so sweet.

red lights - LMAO YES ITS SO AWKWARD WHY DOES IT GO ON FOR SO LONG ah thats good! yeah good point, its quite intense hehe. but that is my fave trope and this is lowkey my favourite track on the album so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ just the combination of hyunjins and chans voices, the backing music, the lyrics ahh red lights my beloved

surfin’ - yes lmao its always a shock, i feel like they should have put gone away in between them, but its such a fun cute song, i cant get rlly mad. yeah, as an aussie i think im contractually obligated to like beaches lol. sand im not such a fan of, but my familys rlly into fishing and my brother loves bodyboarding so we stay at a beach house at least twice a year and we live like 5 mins from 3 different beaches (hehe all aussie cities are on the coast lol) so thats cool. do you like beaches?

gone away - ah gone away my beloved, i love this song sm, its just so pure and showcases their vocals and lyrics so well. yes the pitch change is very out of the blue, i feel liek they went directly from seungmins soft vocals to hans powerful ones which was an interesting choice, but hey, im not complaining

wolfgang - YES IKR ah im so happy he got to be included in that era and song. yeah its such a full on song i cant rlly listen to it if im in a quiet mood but its very motivating :)

hehe mood, i hope they do! ahhh no rest, but at least you wont have to pull a blink and wait a year for any word from the group lol. im not rlly into nct but im excited for them! ah hopefully youll be able to sneak some rest into that chaotic schedule, with enhypen (idk if u stan but yeah) squeezed into it haha

<3 w.a. 🐺

i wheezed at partner in crime, it reminded me of smth. i have a lee know fic in the drafts that i wrote 'in honor' of him (and his departure-ish). i'll tag you when i finish it, if you want. it's a rather hilarious one.

oh my god. based on my experience on the collabs i've joined before, writing explicit shit for '01 & '02 is not accepted (nct's maknaes) but with enha's hyung line '01 & '02 somehow it's okay? i do a double take every time i see fics like those i mean, technically, it's legal but still what the fuck. maybe it's just not for me at the moment. not at us venting our frustration about this. it's just something that's so accepted here that i am (in all honesty) slightly uncomfortable about. but oh well. that's kpop writerblr for you.

man i could've linked all the fics in the ask instead so you wouldn't have to go looking for them! i think i saw you like in class the other day (the fic i renamed into sharp-tongued, god it took me a while to remember the new title). describing champagne problems as an angst to end all angst is one way to put what i was feeling back in december. it just hurt to write and admit?? if that ever happened to me i would prolly cry :d

okay back to the album talk! i love how you answered with more thoughts. i love exchanges like these! i am a victim of the cheese hook and it's now one of my favorite tracks in the album. PLS, TOO MUCH GOOD MUSIC SYNDROME. that's on our self-producing kings 😌💅 also, your brother has taste! as i am typing this, domino's currently playing in my head and i realized that too, that it doesn't have that 'vibe' of a skz title track. honestly, this could be a title track of another group. ssick is starting to grown on me because i found the beats cool kdjsk not the not like other girls 😭 the view is the generic pop that i don't like but i get why a lot of people enjoy it. sorry i love you scratches a certain itch that i find myself singing the first few lines every time i remember it. i too would want to hear felix sing more!

> a mini junction on the album talk bc i got side tracked. on that topic, i want skz to switch positions at some point like i know those allrounders are capable of doing so. specifically, i want to hear seungmin rap!!!! (yk in the recent weekly idol he talked faster than changbin in a challenge and changbin is like the fastest rapper in kpop that's active atm if im not mistaken. my dandy boy has some potential and i want it UNLEASHED.)

back to album talk. silent cry is basically sad music to twerk to. secret secret is definitely one of my favorite tracks :( i loved how you compared the tracks HAJSAH i burst out laughing bc yk what, you're right! i want to make a star lost edit of skz but i simply do not have the time i want to cry. i love the song so much. ok, my dreaded track, red lights. idt i have played the track since we last talked. my friend sent me the lyrics tho and i'm itching to write a twisted au out of it. idk if you're comfortable with yandere but somewhere along those themes. the obsessive type of love that's sweet at first but turns rotten. IMAGINE IF THEY PUT GONE AWAY BETWEEN ASHJA it's like going from 50 shades to the notebook.

i was about to ask if you lived near the coast and you literally mentions it here god im so stupid. yes i LOOOOOOOOOVE beaches so much. living in an archipelago is fun :( i live in a part of the country that's more island than city so every time i want some vitamin sea it's accessible. i heard the waves in australia are great :( anYWHOOO gone away :(( every time it plays im compelled to skip it because it makes me sAD AND NOWADAYS I DONT HAVE THE TIME TO BE SAD. contrary to you, i dislike my quiet moods because i tend to overthink a lot.

i have this little analogy about how there are stays that enjoy songs the generic pop + mellow songs and then there are other stays that enjoy the noisy tracks. in my mind, it's like a perfect balance that makes me feel like all the tracks are loved in the end. just by different people.

PULL A BLINK. bro i fucking hate yg entertainment. they have the biggest kpop girl group LOCKED in their basement when they could be (and i mean this in the most business-like way not morally) milking money of the quad. they're yg's biggest hope at not being bankrupt atm so it's a damn fucking mystery to me as to how they aren't doing anything. (jk i just realized lisa solo album soon, but i still need a ot4 cb hELLO)

i stopped looking forward to the teasers. rest > kpop boys. i don't want to sound like a cult member but have you tried checking out nct? are they just not your thing? (i get it tho, that's one hard group to get into). and yes i do stan enhypen!

wow i love how long these asks are! they're like online penpals. but i also want to ask about you! how have you been lately? are you feeling okay both mentally and physically? how's the weather there? do you have anything that you want to talk about? maybe an interesting book you read? feel free to bring up anything you want to share! i'm getting conscious about talking about myself HAJHSJ

and yet another long answer B) i am sooo sorry T___T should these ask exchanges feel draining to you, feel free to stop sending them in AAAA

[alienoriana]

Why Lonely Road is about John

1st Disclaimer: Approaching a Paul song is trickier than a John song IMO. Mainly because Paul seems to enjoy and embrace more the weirdness, the serendipity, the subconscious that can break in and subvert the creative process. John himself described Paul’s lyrics as surreal (maybe in oposition to his own lyrics, which are “real” real. For more insights about it, read this great post from @thecoleopterawithana). This is important because Paul usually prefer to highlight that aspect when he’s talking about one of his songs. That tendency may create the impression that he is more detached from his lyrics, when in fact he is trying to focus on that dimension that he considers to be an indispensable part of his identity as a songwriter. Sometimes its a dream, sometimes its a catchy line, sometimes its a mistake that works, sometimes its a minor event or a random person (or animal), or all these elements together. And thats what Paul will tell us later when ask about the song: that little thing that made the tune go and grow.

But when one tries to understand a song (emotional) motives, this tendency gets in the way -and probably that’s how Paul prefers it: just keep guessing, and more importantly, keep listening to the songs-.

2nd Disclaimer: As much as I believe that John and Paul were (are) soulmates, Im aware of the equal (and different) intensity of the bond they had with their spouses. The fact that I focus on J/P relationship, doesn't mean that I like to place their relationship over the others, as more important than the others.  In this case (this song) in particular, I say this in relation to Paul and Linda's relationship. Even if I try to show why I think John's presence is strong in a song, it does not mean that I deny the possibility that Paul actually is alluding to Linda, or even both, sequentially or at the same time. Because the heart is that messy and complex, and big.

I feel that I tried to cover myself too much before I even started, but both issues are usually present almost always in my reflections about his (their) songs (my favorite McLennon topic), and I think this post is a good opportunity to express it.

And now, to the song... [finally, right?]

Lonely Road was included as opening track in the album “Driving Rain”, published in november 2001. The main themes of the album are influenced by the mixed feelings of grief over the recent death of his longtime partner, and of excitement over a new relationship. There’s longing and thankfulness, but also the wish to let go to be able to go on.

Some of the songs were written during a holiday in India, in early 2001, where Paul had not returned since the events of 1968 (!). I think this little fact is esential to read this song. We can ask ourselves: Could Paul have remained indifferent to that place so associated with John and The Beatles, and to the memories it could have awakened?

The lyrics...

I tried to get over you I tried to find something new But all I could ever do Was fill, my time With thoughts, of you

I tried to go somewhere old To search for my pot of gold But all I could ever hold Inside, my mind Were thoughts, of you

I hear your music And it's driving me wild Familiar rhythms In a different style I hear your music And it's driving me wild again

Don't want to let you take me down Don't want to get hurt second time around Don't want to walk that lonely road again

I hear your music And it's driving me wild Familiar rhythms In a different style I hear your music And it's driving me wild again

Don't want to let you take me down Don't want to get hurt second time around Don't want to walk that lonely road again

Don't want to let you take me down Don't want to get hurt second time around Don't want to walk that lonely road again

The analysis of the one who does not want to be analyzed...

When asked about this particular song, Paul was as usual nonchalant about its meaning.

In 2001, he was saying this:

‘Lonely Road’ was also written in Goa, where I was enjoying the beach and the sea and generally chilling out in the new century. Again, I had a few moments in the afternoon, which is always a good time for me, a quiet spell when it’s always cool for me to go off and fondle my guitar. The songs basically wrote itself in about an hour. It is what it is, this song, you can make of it what you want to make of it. To me it’s not particularly about anything other than not wanting to be brought down. It’s a sort of anti-being brought down song, which is for anyone and everyone. It’s ‘don’t want to get brought down again, don’t want to walk that lonely road’, it’s symbolic for anyone who’s been through any sort of problems. It’s a defiant song against loneliness, written in a hotel room in Goa. - Driving Rain Interview, 2001.

“It’s a defiant song against loneliness”, thats a fantastic little definition, which goes well with not only this song but many of Paul’s tunes.

In another quote, published much later, Paul speaks a little about the simple motivation for a certain rhyme:

‘Lonely Road’ was written in India, and that’s a bit… I don’t really know what I’m doing, just blues longing. I say I tried to go somewhere ‘old’, that’s India. ‘To search for my pot of gold’, well I wasn’t, I was on holiday. So it’s half imagination, half reality. If I’m looking for a rhyme for old, and pot of gold comes into my mind, then I don’t resist. ‘I try to go somewhere old cos I no longer need a pot of gold?’ Fuck that. Let’s go somewhere old to search for a pot of gold seems more like a song. - "Conversations With McCartney", by Paul Du Noyer, 2015.

In both quotes, its like he’s saying: “It’s nothing, it’s just this song I made up on a holiday, I didnt want to get brought down, ‘old’ just goes well with ‘gold’, the usual things in a songwriter life. Don’t pay that much attention to it, don’t think too much about it, I certainly didn’t”.

Interestingly, he makes reference in the 2001 interview to another song of the same album, and he once again tries to make it clear that the sources of inspiration were deeply rooted in free asociation.

‘About You’ was written in India, in Goa. We had such a relaxing start to an Indian holiday which was at the beginning of 2001. It was exciting, I hadn’t been back to India since the Mararishi days, which was 25 years or so ago. It was great to look around a bit more; I’d only seen Rishikesh, north of Delhi, before. We started off in Goa, relaxed beach time, and one afternoon I wrote ‘About You’ on a little travel guitar I’ve got which has it’s own amp in it. I picked some words out for the song after seeing a copy of The India Times which was lying around. - Driving Rain Interview, 2001.

“I read the news today, oh boy" kind of feeling... Hmmm... (I wonder what that newspaper was about)

IMO, every time Paul strives to asociate a certain song to something inexplicable, casual and without intermediation, he actually suggests that the motivation is very intimate and subconscious. At the same time, he refuses to analyse it. He wont talk about it, because he cant answer for himself at that moment, that place and time. And he probably believes that if he tries to grasp its meaning and set it in stone, sort to speak, he would kill the song. In this case, I think he tries to say there is no clear intention, but its also a strong feeling he can’t help to express.

And when he alludes to the specific lyrics, he carefully avoids the “middle eight” of the song: “I hear your music and it's driving me wild / Familiar rhythms in a different style / I hear your music and it's driving me wild again”.

“I hear your music"... Whose music? 

Ok, Paul, you chose “gold” to rhyme with “old” (and I will not try to relate the “pot of gold” line with the famous twin dreams that John and Paul had after meeting for the first time). Fine. 

But who is the person he is talking to throughout the song? Whose memory is the one “taking him down” there in India, in a supposedly happy holiday?

Yes, it can be Linda, but if so, wouldn't Paul say "our music"?. Im inclined to believe that this music he’s hearing (and its driving him “wild”... wild as “young and rebellious”? wild as “angry and mad”?) belongs or relates to someone different.  

He sings: “Don't want to let you take me down / Don't want to get hurt second time around / Don't want to walk that lonely road again”.

Oh, this part I love. The reference to “second time” and “again” speak of a first time he was brought down and hurt, of a first time he walked “that lonely road”. Can this have to do only with his recent mourning, to which he’s saying in a way he’s done suffering? Or has to do with another, more distant, first departure, first great hurt? And even more, does this “first time” have something to do with India? (I remember now that Paul has another beautiful song that belongs to this period, maybe a little later, thats simply called “India”).

Why John, then?

The song transpires clearly a youthful rebellious spirit (”Fuck that”), expressing the need to shake off melancholy and nostalgia. And I think that in this way he suggests that he is more guarded in front of a process he already is familiar with. HE’S BEEN THERE. Because he has already gone through that lonely road, and it took him a long time to recover. This time, he feels the urge to recover faster (we'll know later that maybe it was too fast).

I dont know if the first mourning refers to his break-up with John or to John’s passing. Perhaps the proximity to India reinforces the first possibility.

Another thing to take into account is the fact that in the album Paul includes a song directly and explicitly related to Linda, Magic. On the contrary, in the case of Lonely Road, Paul decides to leave it orphan: it´s about noone, and nothing.

Lonely Road comes straight from the subconscious. It has a close, immediate trigger: probably another song that he hears and it makes him wild, and it brings him down, and it reminds him of another time when he was left alone.

And I think that song is a John’s song.

P.S.: Oh, not really related, but you definitely should watch the Lonely Road video. 

[martietm]

hey  friends  !  it’s  ya  girl  gigi  , i  prefer  she/her  pronouns  ,  i’m  from  the  gmt-2  tmz  ,  which  tbh  ,  i  don’t  rly  know  what  it  means  ,  and  i’m  twenty  years  old  ,  coming  out  of  my  hole  to  introduce  u  to  martina  .  she’s  real  dumb  but  so  am  i  so  i  feel  like  we  connect  over  that  u  know  ?  anyways  ,  under  the  cut  u  will  find  some  more  info  about  her  ,  n  if  u  wanna  plot  pls  smash  that  like  button  so  i  can  scream  @  u  about  how  high  school  musical  3  rly  was  that  bitch  .  yes  ,  thats  why  it  took  me  so  long  to  get  this  posted  .  i  have  no  shame  about  it  .

ariana  grande  .  cisfemale  .  she&her  .  ／  martina  bianco  just  pulled  up  blasting  929  by  halsey   —  that  song  is  so  them  !  you know  ,  for  a  twenty  five  year  old  singer  ,  i’ve  heard  they’re  really  impetuous  ,  but  that  they  make  up  for  it  by  being  so  sociable  .  if  i  had  to  choose  three  things  to  describe  them  ,  i’d  probably  say  old  band  t-shirts  ,  high  ponytail  &  dirty  sneakers  .  here’s  to  hoping  they  don’t  cause  too  much  trouble  ! 

𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐒  :

𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞  :  martina bianco  . 𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞  :  martie  exclusively  .  please  call  her  martie  she  will  not  answer  if  u  call  her  anything  else  or  maybe  she’ll  just  cry  abt  it  . 𝐚𝐠𝐞  :  twenty  five  . 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧  :  singer  /  songwriter  . 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲  :  closeted  bisexual  /  biromantic  . 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞  𝐨𝐟  𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡  :  newark  ,  nj  . 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭  𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞  :  los  angeles  ,  ca  /  new  york  city  ,  ny  . 𝐯𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞  𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦  :  ariana  grande  . 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲  𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐬  :  sociable  ,  sincere  ,  clueless  ,  impulsive  ,  unbothered  ,  insecure  ,  funloving  ,  creative  ,  unsure  ,  adventurous  .

𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃  :

martie  is  the  only  daughter  out  of  five  kids  ,  and  she  was  born  to  a  traditionally  italian  family  ,  from  both  her  parents’  sides  .  they  weren’t  rich  but  lived  comfortably  ,  and  had  a  really  big  family  in  general  .  holidays  and  birthdays  were  always  huge  in  her  family  ,  and  there  was  usually  a  funny  argument  that  ended  with  the  grandmas  spraying  everyone  with  a  water  hose  .  her  parents  weren’t  very  happy  together  ,  but  tried  their  best  to  work  through  their  problems  and  not  divorce  ,  since  they  were  very  much  christians  and  didn’t  really  believe  in  separation  .  they  did  eventually  divorce  though  ,  but  only  pretty  later  on  in  martie’s  life  .

considering  she  only  had  brothers  and  her  mother  worked  long  hours  ,  martie  didn’t  have  a  lot  of  female  influences  in  her  life  ,  so  she  grew  up  pretty  unconcerned  about  more  feminine  matters  ,  not  because  she  disliked  it  but  she  was  just  clueless to  it  .  when  she  grew  older  ,  she  got  a  lot  more  into  makeup  ,  but  fashion  still  isn’t  her  thing  .  nowadays  ,  she  has  a  personal  stylist  ,  but  when  she  dresses  herself  ,  martie  usually  ends  up  in  dirty  sneakers  and  ripped  t-shirts  .  

so  ,  growing  up  ,  considering  martie  wasnt  too  interested  in  most  of  her  brothers  hobbies  ,  she  had  to  find  herself  something  to  do  .  she  tried  a  great  many  deal  of  things  ,  and  ended  up  discovering  she  loved  music  ,  writing  song  lyrics  ,  playing  musical  instruments  ,  and  singing  .  considering  she  was  pretty  good  at  it  ,  her  parents  supported  her  wishes  and  paid  for  singing  lessons  &  bought  her  a  bunch  of  instruments  and  all  of  that  .

[  HOMOPHOBIA  /  BIPHOBIA  TW  ]  so   she  was  pretty  happy  and  chill  for  her  late  childhood   &  early  teens  ,  contrary  to  some  of  her  brothers  ,  martie  didnt  get  in  trouble  with  teachers  and  was  a  reasonably  good  student  ,  so  they  never  worried  about  her  while  she  was  growing  up  .  that  pretty  much  all  changed  when  martie  not  only  came  out  as  bisexual  to  her  family  but  also  told  them  she  was  actually  in  a  relationship  a  girl  .  her  family  was  very  religious  so  it  didn’t  surprise  her  when  her  mother  cried  for  days  &  was  clearly  disappointed  ,  but  her  dad  raged  and  screamed  and  threatened  her  with  all  kinds  of  punishments  if  she  didn’t  end  her  relationship  and  never  talked  about  her  sexuality  again  instead  ,   and  his  behaviour  made  her  feel  so  scared  that  she  did  end  up  breaking  up  with  her  first  girlfriend  and  didn’t  touch  the  subject  of  her  sexuality  for  many many  years  after  that  .  [  END  OF  TW  ]

it  caused  a  huge  shift  in  her  family  dynamics  ,  unsurprisingly  .  martie  felt  like  she  didnt  have  a  choice  but  to  hide  ,  and  she  really  resented  her  father  for  forcing  that  on  her  &  the  rest  of  the  family  for  giving  her  almost  no  support  .  her  brothers  tried  their  best  ,  but  it  was  really  hard  for  all  of  them  to  stand  up  to  their  father  .  so  she  focused  a  lot  on  her  music  ,  because  by  then  she  was  sure  that  it  was  her  way  out  of  that  environment  that  was  hurting  her  so  much  .

she  was  picked  up  by  a  label  when  she  was  19  ,  and  left  her  home  in  newark  as  soon  as  she  could  .  choosing  to  stay  with  new  friends  and  acquaintances  as  she  worked  her  way  into  the  music  industry  .  after  being  featured  in  a  few  other  artist’s  songs  &  having  a  first  single  to  become  a  smash  hit  (  side  to  side  )  ,  martie  released  dangerous  woman  ,  her  first  album  that  climbed  steadily  up  the  charts  until  she  was  basically  everywhere  .  it  was  a  very  sudden  change  of  environment  but  she  was  very  happy  about  it  ,  at  least  she  wasnt  stuck  around  her  dad  anymore  .

however  ,  she  is  still  just  as  stuck  as  she  was  back  in  her  hometown  ,  since  once  she  blew  up  ,  her  label  &  management  thought  it  would  also  be  a  good  idea  to  hide  her  sexuality  ,  at  least  until  she  was  more  ‘established’  in  the  industry  .  newsflash  ,  its  been  five  years  and  they  still  wont  let  her  come  out  about  it  .  she’s  definitely  growing  impatient  ,  though  ,  so  that’s  not  something  that’s  gonna  be  a  secret  for  too  long  probably  .  still   ,  there’s  not  a  lot  of  ppl  who  know  abt  her  sexuality  out  there  so  far  .

so  ,  in  the  five  years  she’s  been  famous  ,  martie  kept  in  contact  with  a  few  family  members  ,  but  definitely  not  her  dad  .  her  parents  divorced  a  couple  of  years  after  she  left  ,  and  her  mom  decided  to  make  more  of  an  effort  to  be  around  her  &  get  over  her  prejudice  to  support  martie’s  choices  ,  which  helped  heal  their  relationship  in  ways  martie  didnt  really  expect  .

considering  the  career  she  has  now  ,  martie  has  managed  to  keep  a  relatively  unproblematic  image  on  the  media  .  she’s  had  her  controversial  moments  for  sure  ,  and  there  are  definitely  reasons  for  people  to  dislike  her  ,  but  mostly  she  gets  away  unscathed  by  fans  ,  the  media  does  have  a  field  trip  coming  up  w  untrue  headlines  about  her  tho  .

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘  :

okay  so  ,  martie  is  kinda  like  a  not  so  big  kid  still  ?  she’s  never  had  to  actually  be  by  herself  her  entire  life  ,  so  adulting  is  something  she  has  a  certain  difficulty  doing  .  she’s  very  unbothered  about  life  in  general  ,  so  something  really  worrying  that  mostly  everyone  would  freak  out  about will  rarely  ever  bother  her  .  but  ,  she  will  freak  out  for  three  days  if  she  gets  asked  to  pay  her  own  bills  or  something  as  mundane  .  

she  also  kinda  lives  in  her  own  little  world  ,  and  in  a  way  ,  she  can  be  very  confident  in  the  aspect  of  not  really  bothering  about  almost  anyone’s  opinions  about  her  &  her  actions  ,  if  she  wants  to  do  something  that  will  make  her  happy  ,  she  won’t  really  think  about  it  before  doing  so  ,  so  she’s  kinda  reckless in  that  way  .  but  she  also  doubts  herself  very  much  when  it  comes  to  self  worth  &  like  things  related  to  her  actual  personality  .  we  love  multifaceted  muses  am i  right ?  lmao

martie  is  great  to  make  friends  with  ,  she  will  pretty  much  get  along  with  everyone  ?  is  a  super  social  being  ,  loves  being  surrounded  by  people  ,  probably  has  a  bunch  of  her  friends  living  with  her because  she  just  doesn’t  like  being  alone  .  

loves  working  !  spends  almost  her  entire  free  time  in  the  studio  ,  if  u  haven’t  seen  her  in  three  days  chances  are  she’s  trying  to  finish  a  song  .  can  get  a  little  lost  on  it  though  so  she  definitely  needs  some  looking  after  when  she  gets  into  songwriting  mode  .

overall  a  disaster  child  ?  doesn’t  know  how  to  function  but  tries  her  best  &  isn’t  that  all  we  can  ask ? 

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃  𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒  :

a  secret  relationship  with  a  girl  ,  work  collaborators  ,  a  pr  relationship  ,  exes  ,  the first  love  from  high  school  maybe  ?  ,  roommates  ,  best  friends  ,  protective  friendships  ,  good  influences  ,  bad  influences  ,  smth  based  on  ghostin’  by  ari  ,  something  based  on  you  should  be  sad  by  halsey  .

[slayfics]

I Love You.

More Fluff

You join the band at a radio interview only to be surprised that the interviewer asks Murdoc about his relationship with you.

You looked around the station taking everything in. You were at a radio station with Murdoc and the rest of the band. They were going to be doing an interview and Murdoc asked if you wanted to come along. Since being in a relationship with Murdoc you’ve experienced a lot of things you never imagined and watching a band get interviewed for the radio was definitely one of the exciting ones. 

“Mate could you give me an idea of some of the questions you’re going to ask so we can prepare a bit?” Murdoc asked the radio DJ.

“Sure yeah! So i’m just gonna ask a bit about what’s next for the Gorillaz, favorite moments in the band, and what you guys are up to in you personal life with the hiatus going on.” 

“Well I wouldn’t really call this a hiatus b-“

“Oh sorry could you wait till we are recording.” The DJ asked looking a little apprehensive from cutting Murdoc off. He had seen Murdoc get out of hand in interviews and was worried about already getting on his bad side.

“Right right.” Murdoc said waving his hand as if to shoo the thought away.

“Okay we will start in about 3 minutes.” He said and walked away to finish the last of the set up. Murdoc walked over to you.

“So we will be set up here in the sound booth but you’ll be able to hear and watch us from over there.” He pointed to the room on the other side of the glass. 

“Sure.” You said and smiled. Murdoc leaned over and kissed your forehead. You moved to the other room where there was a couch to sit and watch the interview take place. The band sat in their designated seats ready for the interview to start. The DJ came over to his spot.

“Okay is everyone ready?” The DJ asked. “Here we go.” He flicked a switch and the recording light turned on. 

“Hey hey all you beautiful people! It’s your favorite DJ and i’m here with the Gorillaz.” The bass line from Feel Good Inc. played in the background. “Say hi everyone.” The DJ encouraged the band. 

“Hellooo this is Murdoc Niccals straight from your nightmares and onto your radio.” 

“Hi hi! This is Noodle!!”

“Hey what’s going on this is Russle.” There was an awkward pause as the three waited then slowly turned to 2D waiting for him to talk. Murdoc smacked 2D on the arm.

“Oh uh hi umm yeah and i’m 2D singer for the Gorillaz and sometimes keyboard and this one time I played a-“

“Sooo” Murdoc interjected cutting off 2D. “What do you want to know about the Gorillaz?” 

“Okay first thank you for being here with us, and I think what we all want to know is where are you guys now? Was that the end of Gorillaz or will we get another album eventually?” 

“Well immortal things can’t end now can they?” Murdoc answered. “Sometimes instead they adapt and transform to the times, but end of Gorillaz mate? No never. You can’t get rid of us that easy.” 

“Well that’s really good to hear! Can you tell us a bit about what’s next for G-Shock?” 

“Well we have some new designs coming out for sale September 18th!” Noodle answered enthusiastically.

“Noodle could you tell us a bit about what you have been up to since the tour ended last year?”

“I’ve mainly been spending my time with Katsu.” She answered.

“Thats sweet.” The DJ Laughed. “So Murdoc, coming back to you, your fans have been speculating quite a lot. There’s been a few paparazzi photos of you recently with a girl and I think the fans want to know is this your girlfriend? Have you finally settled down from that rock star life style?” The DJ asked. Murdoc’s eyes grew large and his mouth was left agape. He was taken by surprise, he had been asked about relationships before but not in this way, and not with the girl present.

“Well uh…” he was still trying to find words to speak. You suddenly felt sweaty and dizzy. You too were in shock. You never thought Murdoc would ever be asked about YOU in an interview. Why weren’t they asking him about music or how he got the Geep back?? Murdoc finally seemed to regain his cool and started to answer the question.

“The rock star life style never fades out does it? It’s sort of a commitment in itself and settling down I couldn’t even begin to know the meaning of that you know? Life’s always moving and you got to move with it. I haven’t had a real girlfriend since I was a dumb chap back in school.” Murdoc said. You froze. Anger, sadness, regret, frustration, humiliation ran through your body all at once and you couldn’t handle it. WHAT WAS HE FUCKING SAYING? Murdoc was the one that asked you if he was your boyfriend. You stared at him through the glass still in denial of what you heard, but the interview continued and he never turned to even glance at you. You stood up and ran out of the studio. 

You made your way to the ally of the building where you leaned against the wall and sunk to the floor. You put your head between your knees to keep yourself from hyperventilating. Could you really be that stupid? Murdoc was famous of course. You never felt like he lied in any moments he was with you though. When he asked to be your boyfriend if felt so real like he never wanted anything more. So why this sudden change? How could he humiliate you like that? Had you been fooling yourself this whole time? Was he cheating on you? Sure you spent most nights with him but you had work and a normal persons life, not some rock star party life like he had. He could easily have other relationships and you would be oblivious. Just when you thought you were going to explode the door flew open. 

It was Noodle and she rushed to sit down on the floor across from you.

“I’m sorry.” She said. “Murd-“

“I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT!” You barked back. You looked up and saw Noodle’s expression was similar to a hurt puppy. Her eyes were full of sympathy and you instantly felt bad for yelling at her. “I’m sorry Noodle, I just….” You felt the tears finally start to come. Noodle hugged you as you cried into her shoulder.

“Murdoc is stupid.” She said.

“Yeah..” You mumbled. “But you heard him. He doesn’t have a girlfriend and that’s the end of that.” Noodle pulled away to look at you.

“You’re leaving him?” She asked.

“Yes. I was stupid to think this could be meaningful. I just want to go home.” You said putting your head in your hands. The door swung open and 2D poked his head out from behind it.

“Um Noodle they want ya back inside, we’re supposed to take pictures now or sumthin’” He said. 

“Okay,” she said getting up from the floor. “I’ll be back ok?” She said looking at you with a concerned expression. You didn’t want to speak so you just nodded your head. The two walked inside and just when the door was about to close it swung open again. You looked up expecting to see Noodle but it was Murdoc this time. You stood up quickly and took a step away from him.

“Hey I-“ He started to say.

“NO I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT MURDOC!” You yelled back.

“Darling ju-“

“DON’T FUCKING CALL ME THAT! And don’t worry I was just about to take an Uber home so go inside and take your band pictures but make sure you look good FOR ALL THE OTHER BITCHES YOU’VE BEEN SEEING!”

“You know that’s not true.” He said looking defeated.

“I don’t fucking care what you have to say. You’ve already said it you don’t have a girlfriend.” Your voice was shaky and you were trying your hardest not to let any more tears out. You stared at his shoes while you spoke because it was too hard to look at him. “You know, I told all my friends. Do you now how humiliating that is and I just don’t understand all those things you said before. You know I never expected an actual relationship from you but I was stupid enough to try and you just so carelessly throw my feelings aside lik-”

“JUST GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK.” He yelled. This took you by surprise and caused you to look up at him for the first time. He had tears forming in the corners of his eyes. “I’ve never done this before.” He said, his voice was shaky as well. “Please come inside with me.” 

“No.” “Please just let me show you.” He said tears dripping from his face now. “You can leave but please just come inside with me, just give me 5 minutes please.” He looked desperate and fragile as if he were about to shatter in front of you. You hated him right now and the thought of going back in that room made you nauseous but you nodded your head.

“Five minutes” You said and wiped the remaining tears off your face. 

“Thank you.” He went to grab your hand but you pulled yours away. He didn’t say anything just opened the door for you to walk in. You both walked back into the studio where you refused to make eye contact with anyone.

“Hey I actually forgot something.” Murdoc said to the DJ.

“What’s that?”

“Just an announcement about the band.” 

“Oh well I suppose we could record that and edit it in.” The DJ said. “Come back in the booth.” Murdoc followed him and they both sat back down. The DJ turned on the recording light.

“Hey hey listeners, I’m back again with Murdoc Niccals who says he has a big announcement about the Gorillaz.”

“Well it’s not so much big news for the Gorillaz as it is big news for me.” Murdoc said staring at the table.

“Okay well we are all ears.” The DJ said but his expression showed confusion. He looked out at the rest of the band who all shrugged their shoulders indicating they didn’t know what was going on either.

“Well,” Murdoc started. “I told you a little bit of a lie earlier.” He laughed nervously. “See that girl in all those paparazzi photos, well she is my girlfriend. Contrary to the whole life style of one night stands that i’ve known before. You see, I’ve never…mmm” he tilted his head a bit. You couldn’t remember the last time you had seen Murdoc have to pause to search for words. He always seemed to know what to say, but he didn't now. “I’ve never had this type of relationship before, i’m absolutely terrified, extraordinarily happy, but immensely terrified. I’m terrified of messing up but I suppose I already have haven’t I? And i’m petrified of loosing her because well she’s the best thing to ever come into my life and.. I love her…” He laughed again looking at the table still but then looked up at you and smiled. 

You smiled back.

[zhu-xingjie]

Ok so who is this lovely zhennen how old is he wuts his favorite food how do I get him to laugh all the time cuz wow he’s so cute

hnnnhfgfhghdng okay it’s only been a short while since i started stanning him after watching 明日之子 but im going to try my best to introduce him in hopes that other people will start to notice him as well bc he is indeed v cute and v talented ;;

okay so this turned out to be a bit long, so i’ll just summarize in a list and put everything else under the cut:

name: 周震南 (zhou zhennan)

english name: vin

birthday: june 21, 2000

hometown: chengdu

discography: 整整年兩年了 (feat. 馬伯騫), V (debut EP)

tv show appearances: 明日之子 s1, 放開我北鼻 s3, 潮音戰紀(CYZJ)

talents/skills: composing, rapping, dance/vocal

likes: music, jazz, women’s clothing

dislikes: cooked cucumbers, putting the toothpaste cap back on

uwu

so firstable 周震南 (zhou zhennan) was born on june 21, 2000. if you, like many other ppl on tumblr, are getting to know him through 潮音戰紀(CYZJ) then you’ve probably seen the banners that his fans were holding during recording for his recent 18th birthday. he’s actually the second youngest on CYZJ, as well as on 明日之子 so he’s still just a young and tiny bean ;;

his english name is vin, and he is pretty good at english since he went to an american/english type of high school in chengdu. he actually grew up in chengdu, and he has an older sister and a younger brother.

his debut scene into the industry was in last year’s season 1 of a show called 明日之子 (ming ri zhi zi). season 2 is airing now, but it was basically a type of elimination show for idols/singers (if you’ve heard of 毛不易 maobuyi, who’s been all the hype this past year, he was the winner that came out of season 1). he showed that he was able to rap, sing and dance, and he also went on the show along with his good friend, 馬伯騫 (ma buoqian), who was another one of my talented faves from the show ;; (he’s also really heckin h*t but thats beside the point) they’ve also lived together (they might still be living together now but im not really sure), and from what i can tell from interviews, they’re pretty close friends. here’s a link to a vcr type thing that was made during the show (0:40-1:46) and it’s really heckin cute like…. really cute. everyone thinks he’s intimidating bc of his looks and personality when he’s not familiar with someone but he can be a really precious squish :((( you can also find the rest of his performances on that show if you just search “周震南 明日之子” on youtube or something.

anyway zhou zhennan ended up placing 4th overall in that show, and made his official debut afterwards.

his debut EP album “V” was released last year in december, and it’s completely self-composed. there’s five songs on it, and you can stream them on spotify (god bless). he actually also released a remix of a song called “整整兩年了” with 馬伯騫 right before the released the EP (it’s also on spotify). and it’s the song that he performed first on CYZJ.

since then he’s been on a show called 放開我北鼻3 with jackson wang and huang jingyu, and he basically plays with little kids and takes care of them on the show, and it’s really cute and if it doesnt make you uwu then idk what can. here is a link to a short cut in case you’re curious

and now he’s on CYZJ doing collabs with other people and you can watch the episode subbed on youtube since svt/ptg/samuel are also on it and they’re like popular and stuff so…

as a person zhou zhennan tends to come off as cold or intimidating, partly due to his looks. but even ma buoqian, with whom he is very close with, said that zhou zhennan was almost cold to the point of being rude when they first met lol. but obviously around people that he’s more familiar with, he’s a lot more carefree and becomes very cute n precious :(((

oh and idk about his favorite food but i do know that he hates cooked cucumbers with a passion. ma buoqian apparently loves to eat them lmaoo so zhou zhennan was complaining about that. chinese people cook cucumbers sometimes, and he hates the smell of it when its cooked or something asdffgjfdkl oh and ma buoqian says that zhou zhennan never closes the toothpaste after using it hngfgnfhngg

zhou zhennan also tends to wear mostly women’s clothing (and i think ma buoqian mentioned that he likes to wear more gender-neutral types of clothes as well). also his look for his first performance on CYZJ was honestly my fave look on him so far.

he seems to live breathe and die for music (obviously), but contrary to most of his songs/performances, he says he actually really likes to listen to jazz as well. his rap is the strongest aspect of his performance, and i think he’s really driven to improve himself as both a musician and a more well-rounded artist. he thinks that his dancing and singing are only mediocre, so i think he wants to find something or become someone that’s truly and uniquely him in terms of being an artist.

so that’s about all i have for now, and i know i love to digress so it got a bit long…. but if you or anyone else ever want to talk about zhou zhennan then im always free as the #1 zhou zhennan enthusiast

[iamloveandlightsworld]

I'm back here again

Today I looked at myself in the mirror and I couldn't recognise the person staring back at me

No familiarity at all,it's like this body is someone else's but the thoughts are mine

I honestly just want to gamble and go away forever if that's what happens....

I just realised aside from my family, I really have no one left by my side

No one who's actually interested in hearing how I really am when they ask the question how are you?

And then I realized when I finally give up there will be people who will actually feel bad and ask themselves why didn't she reach out and communicate

I'm mortified of anyone seeing me

I feel disgusted by Everything

You're always talking to the void where no gives a fuck about what you're saying

The only good thing in my life is Bangtan

The dreadful feeling is always lurking around but they are the ones who keep me alive with the logic of I can't die before listening to their solo albums

I feel like 2022 should be the end of my journey

I'm a burden when I'm alive and ill still be a burden when I die because of the trauma I'll leave behind

I can't pick a single person who knows this 2022 version of Gin.....I have casual conversations with different people centered around Bangtan but there is no one I deeply connect with

Do the dead still hear music from earthlings

Is it weird that I just want to exist solely on Bangtan...like float somewhere in the universe but get to watch them and support and love them even in death

Look at the way you're talking about people who don't even know you exist...you haven't even mentioned your family or "friends"...you can't even say you want to live for them but at the end of the day,my existence has no impact to their lives whatsoever if I'm dead or alive

So you're just going to behave like no one loved you and supported you...No in contrary thats why I decided to leave...because of the burdensome of a whole grown ass adult woman who can't do shit and blames it on being moody😁😁😁lol

Anyways I feel like an imposter,and no not imposter syndrome

I legit feel like that day I died and this is something else...am I really alive or did I actually die and is this my own personal hell....I'm going insane slowly

Can I please just stop existing but somehow only exist to see Bangtan and all the things they will accomplish...esp Jimin..I hope his album will be released soon because I need to leave and I can't without listening to what he wants to tell us....

I need spiked wine with crushed pills,a burger,icecream and pork and smoke some weed and die peacefully at least.....yes I am selfish by choosing to die but I couldn't stand being alive

Pleasejsjjsjsjsjsj....I'm exhausted

[loveourdawn]

SO. mono...

[IM SORRY IT GOT SO LONG]

there's so much to say and i know nobody cares but i just HAVE to get all my thoughts out of my chest or at least TRY to articulate everything i feel cause im just that kind of person. this may seem highly over-analyzed but that's just how i enjoy things. if i enjoy something so much i will overthink it, devour it to the last piece, swim to the deepest end. so to those who hate that type of stuff, im sorry? im very emotional ajsf  first of all, let me just say how absolutely genius this whole album is!! from the individual tracks to the collaborations to the album art and music video!!!! even the decision of calling it a 'playlist' instead of 'mixtape' is so AH! each factors contributed so well to the artistry and overall vibe of the album and you can see how raw and genuine this playlist is and how brilliantly thought out it is!!! there's an invisible thread of that youre-not-alone comforting melancholic feeling (kinda similar to the cathartic feeling you get listening to the rain falling) that connects each tracks together which makes it such a.. PLAYLIST?!! tokyo. i dont know how to express how much of a perfect track this is as an intro!!! "life is a word but sometimes you cannot say"  KJSBKJCABC ""why do love and hate sound just the same to me"" sjvkjsdnvbsjd such a good song to help introduce the longing vibe of the album. the ending whistle!!! the waves!!! THE FEELINGS!!!!!!!! seoul. must say i looked forward to this track the most. i was extremely curious to see how rm and honne would combine their styles skbjs ive been an avid honne fan since uhhh idk forever?? it was impossible not to have such high expectations but FUCK they just went way beyong my expectations!! love that it still has the groovy honne flavor that i love so much :,) and joon's play on "seoul" and "soul" and the way he used descriptions of the city to express how he feels? "the river harboring too much han" AHH NICEE SO SMART overall a great groovy tune but in a sad mellow way? moonchild. another much anticipated track because of the correlation i thought it would have with track 4o'clock which i love so so dearly. i just ;____; love this song so much ;___; ahhh the lyrics fuCK "we're part of the moonlight" "we're born to be sad" "all the pain, all the sorrow, thats your destiny" "we gotta dance in the rain dance in the PAIN" "MOONCHILD YOU SHINE WHEN YOU RISE IT'S YOUR TIME" "moonchild, dont cry" i just love this so much im just gonna burst. i love the personification of  the night sky/ nightscape. i loveeee the last verse of this song when joon says someone will see your thorns and be comforted LIKE?? FUC KKK "WE ARE EACH OTHER'S NIGHTSCAPE, EACH OTHER'S MOON" [REST.] badbye. I LOVE INTERLUDES! and i love how short most interludes are.. so contrary to popular belief, this song is just the right length imo. (but that doesnt mean i wouldnt listen to a 24hr loop of this song) FUCKIN GET IT eAeon!! the static in the intro contradicts the dreamy floaty feel of this song and i LIVE FOR IT!! "kill me kill me softly have me be scattered fragments" "you know why i cry" I LIVE FOR THE PLAY ON "GOODBYE" OKAY SHAVJBA a very dreamy tune!! (could almost pass as a beach house song honestly) outofplace. i really dont know the correct translation of the title but i guess out of place is the best? this is that song you listen to lying on your floor staring at the night sky.. when you feel so tiny and like NOTHING. the lyrics punctured my heart! the third verse when joon starts belittling himself... I FELT THAT "is this all your worth" "need to do so much better" ah really this is the song i resonate very much with.. when joon says he's so far from who he wants to be although he sometimes crosses paths with that person im so bvjsdbvjbsd [SCREAM]"all i need is me but why do i feel lonely" "i feel so lonely when im with me" "one may receive rain but only that way can you also receive rain" THIS SONG IS NAMJOON'S HUG WHEN YOU FEEL LONELY AND INSIGNIFICANT AND IM SO THANKFUL everythingoes. kinda sounds like a soundtrack and a sunset-going-into-night song.. i didnt expect the track with NELL to be like this i love surprises! when joon goes hard YES! the rain in the end :,) the lyrics are very comforting!!! and the song has such a youcandoit build up that just makes me want to GET UP AND RUN??? "everything has to hurt" "YOU CAN NOT ALWAYS STAY INSIDE A DREAM" [@ me next time sis] this song is telling me (you) that we wiill feel hurt the wind will blow but but BUT IT WILL PASS AND IF THIS ISNT THE BEST MOST COMFORTING BEAUTIFUL THING YOU CAN SAY TO SOMEONE THEN SKVBSDJVBS forever rain. MMMMMmmmMMM that rain sound transition from previous track!! unusual to see the last track to be the title track? BUT NICE. THE MUSIC VIDEO!! i have a deep admiration for animation! JOON'S MELLOW RAPPING IM FADING!! the LYRICS! "let me breathe a bit slower cause my life, my rap is all too fast" sometimes i miss the slow buzz of life :( this reminded me of how much i hate moving so fast how much i actually hate time sometimes.. "if i could knock somewhere if i could kiss the world so hard would someone welcome me, maybe embrace my weary body" THE DESPARATION IN THIS LINE! this whole song depicts what a lonely soul would do for some comfort/acceptance/love(?) but in the end, it is these lengths we take that keep us alive and help us survive overall, i really really love this playlist. in such a short amount of time, it has become very dear to me. with this release, i was able to discover another side of namjoon, his poetic side, his vulnerable side, the not strong leader-rapper RM side.. and i got to bask in his thoughts, in the works of his mind and heart and i find myself falling even more in love with him.

[artificialmillie]

3, 8, 19, 26, 34, 36, 55, 69 (haha), 75, 79, 82, 84, 99!! (i know thats a lot so if you dont want to answer all of them you don't have to i just love hearing headcanons)

3. Who has awful taste in music?Their music tastes are quite different. Aja likes a lot of rock and rap and Farrah is more into pop (but still listens to Pierce The Veil, My Chemical Romance, etc. from her emo days) so they can never agree on what to listen to, and would probably say each other’s music tastes are awful. 8. Who is the better dancer?Aja for sure, because she can do pretty much every genre of dance (even ballet, but don’t remind her of the 5 years of her childhood she spent learning it) whereas Farrah prefers slow stuff and would love to try burlesque, however, she much prefers gymnastics - hence why she’s a cheerleader. 19. Who bothers the other person while the other person reads?We all know Farrah dies without attention. They like to do homework together sometimes if Sasha is busy but Farrah gets bored easily and Aja is far too used to the quietness of Sasha’s house to concentrate when Farrah is trying to get her to pay attention to her. But if Aja is just reading a book in bed, Farrah likes to crawl under her arm and pretend she’s reading too but Aja is always too far along for her to understand what’s happening. 26. What songs do they sing together in the vehicle?Whatever comes on the radio to be honest. Aja has a beautiful singing voice that Farrah could listen to for hours, so sometimes she’ll sing along with her and randomly stop to hear those few seconds of her soloing before Aja abruptly shuts her mouth because she’s not really one to sing around others. 34. What would they dress up as for Halloween?I think it’s a running thing in this little fandom that Aja loves Halloween and Farrah isn’t such a fan. One year, they both agree on one costume which is Harley Quinn and the Joker (Farrah is Harley and Aja is the Joker) and it turns out pretty good. Aja debates dyeing her hair green just for that night, but decides that she loves the purple too much. 36. Do they have pet names for one another?YES! They both call each other “baby” (Aja secretly melts at this and Farrah not-so-secretly) because they both think “babe” is kind of cringey and less intimate. One time, Farrah sarcastically called Aja “honey” and Aja was so touched by it that it stuck. Aja is also (rarely) called “Ajy-poo” by Farrah just to take the piss out of Sasha’s nickname for her she made up one time. Aja calls Farrah “sweetie” on the rare occasion she’s feeling soppy, normally when they’re doing something domestic like (attempting) cooking or in a supermarket. 55. Who would start a fight with another parent at a bake sale?Surprisingly, Farrah. She would take her food very seriously and if anyone dared to make a snide comment about its quality, she’d be up in their face in a second dragging the shit out of their own cooking. There’s also been the odd time that Farrah and Aja have received an odd, judgemental stare from another parent, and that’s when Aja flips. Realistically, I don’t see farraja having kids, but if they did then they’d 100% go to every bake sale. 69. Do either of them have secrets even the other doesn’t know. Yes, a few. Neither of their dads are in their life and that topic is generally off the table for them. Plus, neither one of them know the name of the girls who hurt them (as in Dahlia and Farrah’s ex) and again, it’s a touchy subject, so they don’t bring it up. 75. What is their favourite photo of them two together?Aja is constantly changing her lock screen because she can’t decide on one. For a while, it was a photo of the cheer teams together except everyone was cropped out apart from them, but then they took one out in the sun one day and Farrah was smiling so brightly that it instantly overtook. Farrah loves that photo too, but her favourite one she took when Aja had fallen asleep on her after a day of cheer practice. She’s barely in it (but it still counts as them together) but Aja looks so cute that she had to take it. 79. What do they like to see each other in?Farrah’s /loves/ to see Aja in Farrah’s clothes, simply because she never wears that kind of thing. When she’s not wearing one of Aja’s sweaters and a pair of her jeans, she’s in shorts, skirts, crop tops, basically anything summery, and she only ever sees Aja in a skirt when she’s wearing her cheer uniform. She thinks they really suit her. Aja absolutely melts when Farrah is wearing a skirt or shorts, just anything that shows off her thighs. Sometimes when they’re supposed to be practising, Farrah will purposely twirl around or jump when Aja is behind her so that her skirt flies up, and Aja hates (loves) her for it. On the contrary, she loves seeing Farrah in formal clothing like shirts, because Farrah would never dare to wear anything like that on the daily. Both of them prefer to sleep in a t-shirt and underwear now that it’s getting warmer, and Farrah likes to push it with how much she actually wears when she sleeps over at Aja’s or vice versa. Aja doesn’t mind at all though, she enjoys it - so, in reality, Aja actually likes to see Farrah in nothing at all. 82. What do they love about each other the most?As much as it can be irritating, Aja’s like Farrah’s constant need for attention, because it shows she cares. She doesn’t know what she’d do without her head laying on her shoulder every second of the day, the demand for them to hold hands whenever possible, or the whining when that affection is not reciprocated. It’s a reminder that Farrah loves her dearly, although Farrah actually tells her that quite often anyway. Farrah loves Aja’s mind. She loves the way she thinks, and could watch her work in class for ages, especially when she’s trying to plan an essay in English. Maybe this is why Farrah is getting Cs. Both of them love that the other communicates their feelings. They’ve both been through relationships or friendships with a lack of communication and have consequently not ended well, and they’re so grateful that this one has worked out. 84. What would they write on their partner’s social media for their anniversary?Aja writes a lovely, well-thought-out, practically essay-length caption under a selection of photos of them together. She recounts all her favourite moments of them together, including that one time that Farrah dropped an ice cream and tried to laugh it off so aggressively that she cried. She ends it with a beautiful conclusion, wishing for many more anniversaries to come. Farrah, on the other hand, does not do this. She finds the worst photos she’s ever taken of Aja (although she’d like to argue that all of them are beautiful in their own way, and Aja tells her she’s spewing bullshit and she knows it) and compiles them into one big Facebook photo album so all of their family can see. The caption is “Happy Anniversary!! Love you Ajy-poo 😘”. Aja’s mad, but Farrah makes up for it that night with a lovely candlelit dinner at a restaurant because she can’t cook and a movie afterwards back at her house after her mom has left to go out for the night. 99. What are their karaoke songs?Sasha decides that for her birthday, she wants to have a fun night with the other cheerleaders. They mainly just chill at her house and eat all day before getting drunk in the evening, and Sasha happens to have a karaoke machine covered in dust in her living room. They decide to use it for a laugh while they’re all drunk and just fool around, until Aja, five drinks in, performs the most dramatic rendition of The Winner Takes It All by ABBA and actually sounds /good/. Everyone is in complete shock. Farrah is up next, and she’s so drunk she can barely sit up, so she slurs Mad World by Michael Andrews while lying down on the floor, almost passed out. That’s the first and last time they ever do karaoke. Thank you for this and I had so much fun writing all of it!!

[22azania2]

What is life to me ?

The polarity of things creates new scales of balance and ideas. To every concept exist it's contrary; hot and cold, fragile and strong, black or white. All those concepts have a contrary whit whom it is often attached to but can also live without. 

When you think about life, it can be seen as plural experience like it can be seen as an individual one and as human being we have the chance to see both side of it. We all know the objective truth about life. The objectif troth as to What is life really ? 

The real truth is that life objectively is 'the condition that distinguishes animals and plants from inorganic matter, including the capacity for growth, reproduction, functional activity, and continual change preceding death.'. Simply, the objective truth, the 'real' truth about life is that it s a place for growth, renewal, time period between birth and death. Life, is also associated to the body, as earthlings, life shows through our body, and this concept only could be another subject but this really only a mental note; back to our subject. Life shows through our body, without body in this 3D experience we are not seen as 'alive', we are 'lifeless' as I may say. 

This is what life is on the logical scale, for the real truth matter. But, if you ask someone in the streets what life is changes are that you will come across a bunch of different ideas and conception about what life is. People always add extra adjective to what life is, a great and good life, an healthy beautiful and wealthy life, a wonderful life. And to each adjectives comes a different meaning for each, people will say. I believe that as people 'living', or more like : navigating in a capitalist society,  living a 'ameliorative adjective' life is living comfortably, without money problems and healthily. Obviously the scale of money income can change but overall thats the idea. But see, there's so much different aspects within different aspect on what life can mean to one, this is were the line between objective matter and subjective matter, 'real' truth and subjective truth. What life is to one might not be the same for another one and the beautiful truth -may be untrue- is that, the only one who can make it true is you. The subjective matter of life is shown through you, all the individual lifetimes creates an other definition of what life is, theres no right there is no wrongs to subjectif truth and it is especially true when it comes to what life is to you.

I've gained knowledge on many aspect of life, from energy fields to relationship, to the main aspect of it which is myself I've always missed one point, and, although im trying not to overwhelmed my self with new informations on those various subjects, I've always found myself looking for the missing piece in other people story and timelines : what is life ? And not on a objective matter, but What is life to me ?

As crazy as it may seen I've never went deeply into myself to know what the fuck life is to me. I was never getting stuck into knowing that but I just never really tried to know, and to me, in my personal journey it is one of the most if not the most important question to ask to myself. 

I found that I often, like most humans I believe, am not confortable in the unknown. Not knowing is such a scary things; starting project without knowing if its going to work, starting a new dish with the incertitude that it might taste good, see failure and un-achievement take a big place in my life. Life itself doesn't require any questions around if you are going to make it or not, objectively it doesn’t even matter. Life already has a meaning for itself so I shouldn't be scared to add some flavor to it. Lastly, my life would always be infused and inspired by other people lifes and that's were you see how collapses realities act and what they can do on one person. Here's a little entry to my head. 

Disclaimer : ideas will not always be 100% clear as Im going to put myself in a state of extreme rawness it is more of tool for me to know really what life is to me, it's a genuine questioning time that I just tried to compact in here. 

As I already pointed out, as we live in a capitalist society our way of thinking will always flow with the capitalist view. As detached as you are from it -and lets be honest not everyone has the privilege to completely disidentify with it-, you will always feel a certain attach to your capitalist ways, and one main reason is : money matters. This may be seen as a subjective matter, but it is my matter. Some people will tell you that you don't need money to be happy, to me, this is only bulshit... I do strongly and oh my goodness my needs think like me that money is important. However, I distinguish the need of money with need of peace of mind, because I can. Therefore I don't want to identify 'making it' in life with money as the main center. Making it to me looks like me being older and having done as much things as I wanted to do throughout my life time. Making it will always have different meaning. In the smaller scales, I already made it. I had goals for myself, younger about ascending, which I did, and I came to the understanding that life was made of healing, constant healing. Today I have different goals for myself, I have different needs etc. I also learned that I shouldn't live up to the perfect idea of what making it is to me. I don't want to put boundaries in making it, I want to create my own recipe for each sauce in order to make it. Im not scared of failings and changing fields, trying new things. Obviously there some areas where I'd really like to make it but that's the reason I know that when you program your mind into one goal it doesn't let go, at least for me. I don't want to put limits to my life, to my experiences and everything. Because we live in such a vast universe and with my believes, -which are in reality felt by many others just not articulated the same way-, life is unpredictable. So why should i put limitations to it or only certain goals and not seeing all the other things possible ? And im not saying that because I really feel like I will never be in the same field my whole life, well, maybe thats the main reason why I think like that... At the end of the day it is my story and I like to call myself an experimentalist. Im always in for a new ride a new experience it is what makes me feel alive. It is why I love to create so much because it provides a new experience, why I love to connect so much again it creates new experiences. Experiences might be the core of my life, what keeps me feeling alive. Because as I explained in the beginning, life in it's objective matter is the place for growth and a body living because of it's heart beating, but what keeps you alive is different, and this were comes the subjective matter. This matter, helped creating religion and spiritual belief because the consciousness doesn't identify with its living body because it knows that it's still alive without it, the consciousness lives through thinking and peeling the reasons why its here and many spiritualist showed that it actually only needed to be in the present moment. So as im writing that im sensing that having a goal is a really ego way of seeing life. I gave my honest and pretty materiatistic definition of life, because, ego is part of me and I don't want to get rid of it entirely because what would be the point of entirely putting aside a part of myself -again could be an interesting aspect to discuss on-. That is another reason why I will not beat myself up because I 'did not take it' only because it is my story and im sticking to it.-hopefully you listened to sza's album CTRL-

Therefore, I still havent gave a 'true' definition on what life is to me. Well, it is only a game. At a certain point of my life I even felt like it was a simulation but I quickly came to realization that this belief was not meant for me. I'd rather see it as a game. I play, you play, we all play. Using the word 'play' also puts everything in perspective and it helps detaching from the matter of life. As a privileged person, saying that life is a game gives it a lighter dimension, it makes things less serious and harsh, cause life be damn harsh. I understand that if I play, others do to so I might as well play to my fullest and certainly play to please myself. I also see life as the fourth elements, I recognize that the four elements, air, water, earth and fire, are the pin-points of the Man kind experience. I had an awakening on those elements and what they represent in my life or should I say in my experience of life. These elements are obviously important in physical matter as they also are in mind matter. Just like christians with transubstantiation, I see those physical matter transform into mind matter, lecons or even traits of personality for some (blame it on astrology). Without elements there is no life, no human life, no plants, no animals no nothing. Nature, is a unconditional source of learning, physical and mentally. 

I think, for now, my idea of life is to just do it, to stop chasing the dream and to stop limiting myself but rather to act and live the dream. Life is what was offered to me before all the Man creation, Life is in me, through me and around me.It was important to me to find a definition for myself because I'm all about knowing how to navigate through certain wave, and if I don't know what wave life is to me I might drawn. And although drawing would most likely happen because my mind is constantly changing, I needed a structured self explanation to know where I am physically. We all know where we are, right now im in my bedroom, in my bed for more details, but I didn't know and feel really where I was in terms of space. In which picture do I want to set myself ? In which movie do I feel more confortable playing ? Those are the questions I think I answered and I think everyone should answer -to this questions and or more questions that come to mind because at the end it is your life- because we live in a world were everyone has expectations  but most of the people don't even know where they are, people are lost and losing there ground that is there life.  I don't think you should stay in a shell and hide yourself from the world even if you have the opportunity to, unless you really want to. I just think that your reality should be your main priority. There is no picture perfect life obviously but you have the choice to make it something that is yours. Create your reality. Obviously, with social medias, friends, family members and every other big institutions like church, school, work etc it is hard to own your reality. That is the reason why you should always hang around people who inspires you to live in your reality and respects it, not everyone will because your reality comes from a subjective matter. Own your reality in ways that it helps you grow and flowing in the wave of life, but, don't own it with the ego, own it for yourself and for no one else. If it ends up resonating with other people realities it is beautiful if not its okay. But don't surround yourself with people who take you out of your ground and directly your grind; because its when you know in which game you want to play that you start making decision towards it. 

[ssfoc]

I really liked your post that analyzed the savan kotecha interview in the context of harry's album release and a possible one direction reunion. I especially liked that it addressed the idea of authenticity in the music industry. i've always thought that the pop music industry straddles this weird line between Making Art and Making Money (in a similar way to Hollywood), and discussions about what causes an act to be perceived as "authentic" is very much at the heart of that dichotomy. (part 1)

(part 2) If the goal is to make money, why does authenticity matter? because an audience only responds to genuine emotion, and only authentic bands can produce music with genuine emotion? or because we’ve been told that a certain style of music is “good” and all others are “not as good”, and only authentic acts make “good” music? if “authentic” is just code for “good”, then acts should be judged only by their musical merits. however, that is clearly not the case.

(part 3) Authenticity is a perceived trait, and only matters because the pop music industry says it matters. **insert argument regarding the white man’s call for the death of disco due to its ‘inauthenticity’, even tho it was just because so many women, POC, and lgbt folks were being successful at it** ANYWAY basically the pop music industry is a sham thats out to Make Money and not Art, and any time arguments are made to the contrary, they never hold up to scrutiny IM SORRY I HATE MYSELF AUGH!

Hi!

No no no, don’t hate yourself. Your perceptions are accurate and on target.

When I write that the boys want to be seen as authentic musician, I mainly mean they want the respect of the industry. The know that people like Savan and Ross are on the Grammy board, and are the taste makers, for better or for worse.

The taste makers themselves are contradictory. They discuss emotional honesty, but at the same time obsess about how long their songs stay at #1, why certain songs make it to #3 but never beyond that, the revenue generated by their songs, and how to use the system to maximize listenership. They use software to measure audience response to songs. For instance, they measure responses to specific words in song titles, topics (“girl” songs vs. “guy” songs), repetition of certain rhythms and instrument combinations in songs, the length of songs. They deliberate on the demographic of the intended audience– the larger the demographic, the more likelihood of a chart climber. These tools aren’t used for every song, but they’re used often enough.

Yet the taste makers want, for the lack of a better word, genuine musicians who came into success “the honest way,” through suffering and struggle. The thought is that somehow the struggling musician who ate beans for dinner for thirteen years knows more about genuine emotion than the boys of 1D.

Some of this bias has to do with the intended audience of music. Women are always seen as less discriminating, more easily swayed by emotion, less objective consumers of music. When one of my friends showed a piece I wrote on 1D to her radio station colleague, he automatically assumed I was a male critic– because only male critics write about theory, right?

A good discussion is found in @onedirectionthesis.tumblr.com, Scott Interrante’s masters thesis on authenticity and One Direction.

Another interesting discussion of popular taste is Carl Wilson’s book, “Let’s Talk About Love: Why Other People Have Such Bad Taste.”

Thank you for your great observations.

S

[ashroseevans]

No Place I’d Rather Be 1

Four years…

It’s been four years since the prince disappeared and the world fell into darkness. Everyone… moved to Lestallum when the daemons came. There was no other safe place. At least Lestallum had power and light, enough to keep the daemons at bay. Everyone started to believe that the King of Kings would never return, that the world would stay shrouded in everlasting darkness, the scourge of daemons never ending.

I was one of them.

Until I met Prompto. It was only a little less then a year after the endless night started. I had seen him around Lestallum before, helping out those that were left out on the streets because they couldn’t find someone to live with or because food was scarce. I had always wondered what kind of idiot would give up food like that, and gil when he could use that to make sure he survived.

But then I met him.

It was only by chance. I was walking down the alleys to the market place, hoping there was something new there to eat. It was all the same, but it was enough. With the money I had stockpiled, I bought enough for me to eat and I started back home. On the way back, just outside of my apartment, I was jumped by a man who barely looked like a man. There was no meat on his bones, he was completely emaciated. I froze in my tracks when he held the gun to my face.

“Drop everything and go,” he said, pulling the hammer back on the pistol.

I was scared. Too scared to move. All I could do was stare at the barrel of the gun and wonder is this how I’m going to go? In the alley in front of my apartment, alone, nothing to leave behind to even prove that I was alive here. Then I heard another click and felt an arm drape over my shoulder.

“Now, is that any way to treat a lady?” said a voice next to me.

I turned my head to see the blond man called Prompto who I thought was stupid for giving food and money to people when he himself didn’t even have a place to stay.

“P-Prompto!” The man said, his hands on the gun shaking. “I-I didn’t know you were in town!”

“You didn’t answer my question,” Prompto said, a devilish smirk on his face. “Is that any way to treat a lady?”

“N-no,” he said and slowly lowered the gun.

“Thats a good boy,” Prompto said and lowered his own gun. He reached into the satchel next to him and pulled out half a loaf of bread before he handed it to the man. “I know you’re hungry, we all are. But this isn’t the time to turn against each other.”

The man nodded, tears in his eyes and bowed to Prompto. “T-thank you!” he said before he turned around and ran off.

My rescuer then took his hand off my shoulders and looked at me. “Are you okay, miss?” He asked.

I looked at him and for a while, all I could do was nod. “Y-yeah, thank you,” I said.

“Good. Then I’ll be off. People to save, daemons to kill, you know how it is,” he said and started to walk off.

Without thinking, I reached out and grabbed his hand. “W-wait. Let me thank you properly for helping me,” I said. “It’s the least I can do.”

He turned and looked at me. “Sorry, but this knight already has someone that caught his eye,” he said.

I shook my head. “Not like that,” I said. “You just gave your food to that man. You must me hungry. At least let me feed you.”

Prompto opened his mouth, to what I assumed would have been to decline my offer, but his stomach growled. “Er… all right. If you insist,” he said.

The rest is history really. When he came to town and I saw him, I would always invite him in for a meal. The idiot who gave his food to other people deserved to have someone look after him every once in a while. Almost a month after I started feeding him, I offered up my apartment as a place for him to stay. He was reluctant at first, but I told him that daemon hunters needed a place to sleep to better take out the monsters plaguing Lucis.

So Prompto started living with me. Most of the time, it was just me alone in the apartment, as Prompto would usually hang around Hammerhead. A friend of ours, Talcot had told me that he was trying to impress “Miss Cindy” because he’s been crushing on her since he ran with Ignis, Gladiolus and the prince. Talcot told me a lot of their adventures before the world fell into darkness. I couldn’t get the stories from Prompto because he was never home and when he was… he didn’t want to talk about it. The thought of Noctis sometimes would bring his happy-go-lucky mood down and I hated to see him like that. So I rarely brought it up.

Until I found a photo album laying out on the couch. Prompto had been out for a few days and I don’t even know how I hadn’t noticed it before. But there it was, with a note on the top. I picked up the small piece of paper and read it.

_____,

Talcot told me you’ve been asking about my past and that you never asked me out of consideration for my feelings. So I thought… it’s time to show you just what happened before Noct was swallowed up by the Crystal.

Prom

I sat down on the couch and brought the photo album on my lap. As I started to thumb through the pages, I examined each and every picture. I could just… feel the emotions behind them, feel the happiness the boys felt at the beginning of the album. As the pictures moved forward and I started to see Prompto’s adorable selfies with his friends, I felt my heart swell. Then… I reached the end of the album. The… seeing the man I knew as Ignis from the few times I met him when he first lost his sight… the pain he must have felt hurt me. The pain of seeing Prompto being stuck in the middle of Noctis and Gladio arguing after Ignis lost his sight… seeing all of it nearly brought me to tears.

“It wasn’t all fun and games, but… I do miss them all.”

I jumped. I hadn’t heard Prompto come in, but there he was standing behind me. He was leaning against the couch, his hands braced on the back and his head was scanning the picture my hand rested over. It was a picture of them with Talcot as a little boy, Gladio’s sister Iris, old man Cid and someone I didn’t recognize.

“I’m so sorry, Prompto…” I said. “I can’t imagine how hard it is for you, not being able to hang out with them anymore.”

“It’s… not that I can’t,” Prom said. “Its just that… it’s too painful for us to be around each other for long without Noct. As much as Gladio hates to admit it sometimes, Noct was the glue that held us together.”

I closed the book and stood up. Leaning over the couch, I wrapped my arms around his neck, hugging him. He slid his arms around me, hugging me lightly. I wasn’t even sure if he was comfortable with it, but… it was the only way I knew how to comfort someone who looked so… lost.

“You’ll see him again,” I said. “I know you will.”

For his sake, for the sake of the man I lived with and his friends, I started believing with all my heart that the darkness would end.

*     *     *

“You’re not going,” Prompto said and leaned against the doorway of my room with his arms crossed.

“I don’t think you have a say in that,” I replied.

My back was to him and I was packing up a bag of necessities. Some provisions, a change of clothes, the gun Prompto taught me to shoot just outside the city where he knew it was safe, copious amounts of extra rounds. A flashlight. I tugged on the leather jacket I stole from his room once upon a time. He grew out of it and Cindy didn’t want it so it was just… sitting there. I had asked if I could have it and he said he didn’t care.

“I’m your friend! I think I have every say!” Prompto said and straightened up. “You’re not leaving the city!”

I turned and looked at him. The hard look he gave me didn’t phase me at all. It’s not that I’ve seen the look before, quite the contrary. Prompto was never harsh with me. When he was around, he was always joking around, trying to have a good time when he wasn't outside helping the people who lived on the streets. It’s just that I was determined to do my part in the battle against the daemons too.

“How are you going to stop me?” I shot back. “Who’s to say that I don’t do this regularly when you’re in Hammerhead showing off to Cindy?”

I didn’t say it harshly, but the look on Prompto’s face made it seem like I’d just slapped him. “You don’t… leave regularly, do you?” His voice got really quiet.

I sighed and walked over to him. “No. This would be my first time leaving the city without you,” I said. “And going farther then just a couple of yards outside the gates.”

“Can’t you please just stay here? Let the other hunters take care of it,” he said and put his hands on my shoulders, looking at me with determination. “There’s no reason for you to leave Lestallum.”

I reached up and moved his hands off my shoulders and shook my head. “I can’t, Prompto,” I said. “I’m sorry. But I can’t just sit around and do nothing anymore. I want to do something to help and with your help, I finally can.”

“You’re really making me regret teaching you how to shoot,” he groaned and sighed. “Just… promise me that you’ll be safe, that you’ll come home.”

I nodded. “I promise. I’ll see you soon, okay?”

“Yeah…” he sighed and straightened up. “I’ll be waiting. There’s… something I need to talk to you about when you get back anyway.”

I was halfway to the door when I stopped and looked at him. I narrowed my eyes at him a second. “If this is some kind of ploy to make me curious and keep me here, it’s not going to work. I’ll see you in a couple of days.”

He walked up to me and simply gave me an almost bone crushing hug and a light kiss in my hair, something that he’s never done before. “It’s not. But I’ll be waiting. Come back to me.”

My breath stopped and I looked up at him just as he let go and walked into the kitchen. “Er… right. Bye, Prompto.”

He didn't say anything and I left the apartment.

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