#and that's my extent of like . social interaction for the week

[appreciatingtokrev]

man ik that i just said i'll be more active again a few days ago but my mom n i started having an arguement yesterday and it's going deeper n deeper with more n more issues coming up and. it's just fucking over my mental health so. yeah. if i'm less active i'm alive and physically well just feeling like shit. <3

[lettucedloophole]

i am actually getting so depressed it's really bad,,, i don't feel like doing anything regularly i just feel like a huge pile of mush 🫠 really stressed about what this means for my schoolwork. wish i could just snap myself out of it by needing to do something but i don't need to do anything. i can't feel the fear necessary to fuel my academic pursuits but i Do still feel Anxiety which is maybe why i keep having nightmares lately. rewatched and finished watching the good place which was nice... it kind of begs a lot of questions about stuff though which is not so nice. i feel so... rotty just staying home all day talking to no one. i wonder if i will ever get back a thirst for what existence has to offer, or if i'll slowly fizzle out until i die. i honestly don't know what to do for myself anymore. how do i fix my brain's function??? i wish i could enjoy things and feel motivation. i sleep so often now, i just go to sleep when i don't feel like doing things anymore so i know i'm probably oversleeping quite a bit. existing like this is just so fucked and everyone i know irl, friends or people i'm trying to be friends with, are too busy to pay me any attention, and i feel guilty when i'm upset about that because its not their fault they have Lives and Responsibilities and i don't. i feel like a zombie. i hope i can just make it thru this semester and things will get better in the winter when i'm taking a break. or maybe when i try a new depression treatment.

i kind of feel this feeling that's like a depressing version of contentment. i feel like everything's already been done and there's nothing i could possibly do that would mean anything. i feel like i need to unconvince myself of this to live happily but that's really hard when i've already lived in it for awhile. i just can't go on like... living like this, though. i'll just die of boredom or eventually kill myself if everything continues to be so futile. being stuck at home is like actually killing me slowly along with the mental illness and such

[daydreamdoodles]

Do not let me be social tomorrow, okay? No friend hangouts, no calls, none of that

If it causes me anxiety, I ain't doin' it

[pickingupmymercedes]

My Mark - Lewis Hamilton (NSFW)

Pure SMUT - NSFW

We're nearly at a 100 followers, which is insane to me, so here's a smut to celebrate

pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Reader!

warnings: unprotected sexual activities, jealousy, oral (m!receiving), penetrative sex (p in v), creampie.

wordcount: +1k

a/n: There's close to no plot, like whatsoever, it's pure smut.

Also, wrap it before you tap it

As always, I'm open for feedback, come say hi!

EXPLICIT CONTENT UNDER, -18 DO NOT INTERACT.

______________________________________________________________

He was him, and you were…well, you.

You had always prided yourself on not being the jealous type, you had always trusted your relationships and to an extent, you trusted your own game. You weren’t a model, but you had learned how to feel good within your own skin, how you were the only one able to give yourself the confidence to be your best.

But you were dating the Lewis Hamilton, and as much as he would show you, time and time again, that the Sir was a persona detached from “Lew”, the guy that marveled at the simplest sight of normalcy, sometimes you’d feel the weight of sharing the slightest piece of him with the world.

And that particular evening, as you turned off your work computer and peeked at your phone you felt an anguishing burn in your belly as photos and videos of Lewis at Grace Wales Bonner showing at the Paris Fashion Show popped up from every social media. The white suit, the lack of undershirt, his stray braid, the way his thumb traced the corner of his lips, they were all mouthwatering things and mannerisms you’d gotten almost used to over the months of your relationship.

He was hot, God-like hot, you knew that, and you also knew people wanted him as much as you did, but while scrolling through the official photos one in particular made you smirk as you walked into your London apartment. A slight cut in his bottom lips, that could very well be seen as nothing, was the physical reminder of where your teeth had drawn blood amidst his vigorous thrusts the previous week.

So, you did the one thing you’d tell yourself over and over not to, packing your bags early, rescheduling all your commitments and rebooking your plane to Nice in two days to get to Paris in the early hours of the next morning.

As you got to his hotel room you saw the smirk on his face, his lazy posture with his arms spread across the bed and the covers only to his waist giving it away he had already been told you’d be arriving, a “bastard” muttered under your breath.

You undressed as you got to the bed and crawled onto the fluffy cover on his lap, leaving kisses all the way from his belly button to his neck, a lazy smile all across his face as he opened his bobba eyes. You kissed him like his lips were made just for you, your hunger to be his and to make him yours guiding your every move as he too felt the urgency and deepened the kiss.

“Why so needy, babe?” his lips leaving ghost like touches on your shoulders, his arms bringing you closer to his chest as he pulled you into his laid body. It didn’t take long for his hands to find your ass, for his touches to become firmer and for his lips to part as he let low murmurs of pleasure as you rocked onto his lap, his boxers and your lingerie the only barriers.

“You’re mine, Sir” your eyes delivering the message to him that he was now your main and only target, in a hunt you’d already won but needed to make it crystal clear. `

You took advantage of the brief moment he’d taken to register your affirmation to make your way back to his waist, hands slowly tracing all the muscles in his abs until your fingers got to the happy trail he hadn’t waxed in a while.

“Please, let’s not start something we’re not going to finish” A tug at your arms as he made you look up at him, his hands creating a makeshift ponytail with your hair and his eyes half glazed with lust already.

“I’m not one to leave things unfinished” a smirk displayed on your features before you turned your attention back to his body, palming his already rock-hard penis through the fabric of his boxers and getting his hips to jolt up as he hissed at how sensitive his member already was.

His breathing got shorter and the patches of precum got more noticeable the more you toyed with the hem of the fabric. His gaze fixed back on you when your fingers went up to his abs, a momentary break for him to catch his breath, not long enough though before you freed his angry and wet head, giving the slit a soft kiss before pulling his whole underwear down to reveal his penis in all its glory.

“You don’t get to do anything this time” Your hand pushing on his chest as he motioned to sit up and bring you to him. Siting back on your knees your hands started to spread the precum from his tip onto his length, pumping it with the sweetest smile you could muster while looking up at his desire-filled features, his grunts the only noise alongside the eventual pops your lips would make when you started to suck him, one of his hands softly going to your head as you worked your lips in unison with your hand on his member.

“Gosh, y/n, I’m gonna cum like that” And you could feel in how tense his lower abdomen felt and how raspy his voice sounded that he was really close.

“I want your seed in my pussy, I’m the only one that can have it” You whispered close to his lips as you straddled him, just mere seconds before your walls fully took his length, the sharp stretch that he still managed to give you, overwhelming all your awareness of time and space, his hiss and curses the only sounds you were able to hear. It took you a while to be able to move, his hands smoothing the skin on your waist as he breathed praises.

As he raised his upper body, to adjust the pillow under his head, his hips followed his movements and his tip slightly brush your g spot, earning a guttural moan from you, your sight sharply refocusing on his darkened eyes above you. He reached for your waist to bring you closer and this time you allowed him to stand up a bit, giving the first few rocks on his dicks as you clutched him by his shoulders.

The more you moved the harder it got for you to stop, getting lost in the pleasure, “oh shit” coming out of his mouth every few seconds as you felt his breathing getting shallow until his strong hand held you by the waist, holding you down as he tried to control himself, his eyes closed and inhaling sharply against your chest.

“You okay?!” His sudden need to stop caught you off guard and you held his face searching for any sight of pain or discomfort.

“Yeah… you’re just… you’re so hot” his now opened eyes admiring your features, his breathing coming back down.

“I’m close too” Your reassurance giving him the confidence to thrust his hips up, laying back on the pillows to watch at where you two connected and finding his away to your swollen clit, massaging it with his licked thumb as your movements got less coordinated.

Each time his penis entered your walls you could feel every millimeter of him, you felt full with each thrust and it wasn’t long before the desire went from just wanting him to needing to feel his touch everywhere you could. You reached for him and without questioning he took control, peppering the skin on your neck with sloppy kisses before flipping you to lay on your back still with his dick inside you.

He kissed your lips as softly as he could, a totally different demeanour to how deep and rough he fucked you, breaking the kiss every now and then to look at you with those sex hazy eyes you had grown so fond of.

As he got closer his thrusts got sharper and carried more force, he raised his body and rested his hands on either side of your waist, hitting a deeper spot that got you squirming, the skin-on-skin noise filling the air all around with your moans and his grunts.

It wasn’t long before you felt his thumb on your clit again, this time though he kept the pressure even when you bit on the skin of his shoulders, your walls clenching around him when your vision went white while he kept pounding, riding your high and also making sure every spill of his semen found its way to your cunt.

His last thrusts were always the hardest to take, the ones that would hit deeper and sharper, the one he had near to no control over as his instincts pushed him to stay as deep as he could, for as long as it took you both to come back down to earth. Always leaving kisses on any skin his lips made contact with, fingers tracing patterns and whispering sweet nothings on your ears.

“Hello to you too” His eyes now soft and filled with love, the darker pupils back to its normal size as he slipped out of you and collapsed by your side, pulling you to his chest soon after.

“Surprised?” your hands finding its favorite place to rest on his abs as you laughed at his dazzled stare at you.

“You make me a hot mess. I always have to hold back when you’re riding me” You gave him back a half smile half smirk, leaving a kiss to his chest as his fingers traced the skin on your arms.

“Guess I have a new favorite position then”

“What was that all about, by the way? I thought we were meeting in Monaco in two days” His attentive eyes now looking at you for answers.

“The mark on your lips from last week, it’s still there” You lift your head to look at his lips, the lust back in the gleaming of your eyes as he remembered the sting in how hard you had bitten on his lips.

“All of this, for a mark?” He chuckled, amused at how random some of your actions seemed to him.

“My mark. You’re mine, Lewis Hamilton” You pointed out, pulling his face to yours, finding his lips in the type of teeth and tongue kiss.

“Always…I’m all yours”.

______________________________________________________________

TAGLIST - @saturnssunflower @xoscar03 @chocolatediplomatdreamerzonk

If you’d like to be added to my taglist you can leave a comment or send me a dm/ask.

[sgrplumditz]

Orange peel theory w/ Simon Riley

They had all been granted time off work for a couple weeks now. Being left uninterrupted by her typical life of briefings, debriefings, flights across the globe, and long days away from home only added to her restless nature and her seemingly effortless ability to grow bored --like any woman in her 20's would do to kill time she downloaded social media.

"What the fuck is the orange peel theory?" she spoke to herself as she tossed a piece of the mentioned fruit into her mouth. She continued scrolling through what appeared to be an endless supply of videos regarding the topic. Once she had grasped the concept she shut her phone off and only stared at the scraps of orange peel sitting on the table, a small "hm" leaving her lips as she wondered if that mindless social media trend held any real substance.

Can a person truly show how much they care about another by simply peeling an orange for them? Does peeling a fruit display the extent of their affection?

Shaking her head to clear her mind, she stood up collecting her trash. "No wonder women today are insane..." she thought to herself as she found herself spiraling into deep thought over a fruit named after its color. The over-scrutinizing coming naturally.

-----------------------------------------------------------

"Don't request to follow me, killer", said Simon in his typical stoic tone. Simon had always referred to her as “killer”, not because of her career choice, but simply because of the way her eyes sat on her face. When she was on duty she wore a balaclava — similar to Simon’s, but it was more precautionary. She actually had no interest in keeping her identity concealed, but being the only woman on the team meant that she would easily become a target if her identity and gender were to be revealed — hence Simon’s encouragement behind the wearing of a balaclava, which the entire team also agreed would be a good idea. However, when she wore the cloth that hid her features her eyes become even more prominent. The striking color only complimented by the sharp almond shape that seemed to drag at the ends. Because of that Simon then coined the nickname “Killer” for her Killer eyes, which she only accepted as a term of endearment.

“We are not friends, just co-workers". Simon had always been impressively kept to himself in the sense that his private life remained private -- if he truly had one outside of his job. He was good at being a literal ghost. Not many (if any) knew not even the smallest of details — like a hobby, or a favorite color. His name itself was also a privilege to know. She was always curious about him, but she never pushed boundaries on the man. What he revealed to her was what she accepted, a quality that he enjoyed about her, amongst others.

"Aw, c'mon! You let Soap follow you!" she replied with a slight chuckle leaving her mouth. She and Simon were sitting together in the living room of the house that all of Task Force 141 shared. It was convenient, close to the base, and it also meant nobody had to pay rent, but it was empty as of recently. Everyone but her and Simon had taken advantage of the break and decided to travel elsewhere for the remainder of their time off -- leaving only them two in the giant 7-bedroom house.

"He's my friend" he replied still holding the same disinterested tone, yet his body language displayed him to be seemingly intrigued by the conversation. That was one of his best qualities. Simon was not one to initiate an interaction himself unless he felt the need to assert himself, but that did not mean that he was not able to hold a conversation with substance.

"For someone who has social media you're not very social," she muttered as she slumped back on the couch in defeat. Her gaze lazily resting on him.

"Touché" was his only retort. At this point, he had also leaned back in his seat, his hips inching upward as he adjusted himself to be more comfortable. How his body reacted to the movement made his abdominal muscles contract -- her eyes resting on the contracting anatomy. He also maintained his gaze on her, and for a second there was a slight hint of amusement in his eyes as they softened knowing that he knew exactly how to get under her skin. With him being so quiet meant that he was always observing the others, learning their mannerisms and personalities. She couldn’t help but admire him. It was clear that she was fond of him — especially in the physical category, Simon easily embodies the definition of what it means to be a man. He is tall, muscular, handsome, and his personality was simply the cherry on top of the 6’3” sundae.

"I'm... social..." she reclaimed as she removed herself from her spiraling thoughts of him, her tone slightly defensive. Similarly to Simon, she was a homebody and actively avoided situations that required her to be out of her comfort zone for an extended period of time -- perhaps that is part of the reason why the two got along so well. "I just have.." she attempted to continue, but she was cut off by Simon finishing her predictable answer.

"... a social battery. Yeah, you've mentioned that before, Killer." his eyes narrowing slightly amused at her reply. He chuckled shaking his head and pulling his cellphone out of the pocket of his gray sweat pants. He typed into the device’s screen for a few seconds before tossing it to his left side, “Happy?” He chuckled , her phone vibrating as he spoke. She obviously knew the notification was from him, so she didn’t even bother glancing at the device.

“I knew you’d come around. You can never say no to me” she smirked. The pair would often go back a forth with mildly flirtations comments, all of them being light hearted and mostly came from the fact that she was the only woman on the team. The playful banter merely came naturally — at least that is what she assumed. She never took Simon as the type to ever have a genuine interest in a woman due to obvious reasons.

“How could I ever say no to those eyes, Princess?” A teasing tone lingering on his tongue. Princess was the second nickname he had labeled her with. Again, being the only female of the team meant she got some sort of special treatment from everyone else. Soap would help her carry in her groceries — knowing she was more than capable, Price would always brew her some fresh coffee along with his own then place it in the fridge so that by the time she woke up she could easily make an iced coffee without having that watered down taste, and Gaz would often restock her feminine care products for her. Him calling her Princess was the most teasing variation of her nicknames. Although she was well aware of the meaning and the reasoning behind it she could not help but smile whenever he used it. Her full lips parted slightly as a soft grin appeared on them and oddly enough he returned it with a half grin.

He forced himself to stand up before he became completely engulfed in the moment, "I'm gonna make some lunch. Wanna join?" he prompted as he initiated his walk to the kitchen. With a slight nod of her head she also raised herself off the couch and followed closely behind him. God does he always smell good, she thought to herself as they walked.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

She sat on the kitchen island scrolling through her phone as Simon cooked them both lunch. The two had grown to be comfortable around each other, and their kindred personalities only added to their ability to sit in a peaceful silence. The aroma created by the mixing of spices and ingredients only made her stomach growl and rumble. The sound audible to both her and Simon and truthfully she could not wait to eat. She considered having a snack before just to ease her stomach -- before she could even set her phone down Simon had handed her a small bowl of fruit.

Specifically a bowl of oranges — peeled orange slices. She stared at the bowl in awe. Her gaze was unintentionally soft. As she shifted her gaze to him she noticed that he had gone back to cooking their lunch, as if the action itself was natural to him, something he didn’t think twice about doing for her. He had taken notice of her staring which made him quirk an eyebrow at her as he grabbed a piece of orange from the bowl that was sitting on her lap, close to her lower stomach, casually tossing the piece of fruit into his mouth. “I thought you liked oranges” he spoke with the assumption that she was disappointed in the contents of the bowl.

“I do.” she replied softly. He gave her a small wink prior to turning his attention back to their meal. The entire interaction being a sign of pure affection.

_______________________________________________

Pic credit:

instagram/tiktok: takeoffurmaskghost

[dykedvonte]

what do you think Danse does to keep himself busy after blind betrayal, specifically if he's living in sanctuary? I just love your takes on him a lot haha

I think Danse is very lost in any settlement but especially Sanctuary. It was the first and very close-knit at that with the small group the Sole Survivor founded it with. Each time they would invite a new companion to live there it was like adding a pillar to the community and represented what the Minute Men stood for when it came ot uniting and protecting the commonwealth as one. I am not going to say it's cliquey, in fact I feel like SoSu and Preston/Sturges would go out of their way to make newcomers feel welcome but for Danse that is very different.

He (from my playthrough experience) is one of the later companions. I ran around a lot and got a good portion of the companions and their quest before act one was done. He is also one of the few companions who openly thinks lowly of life in the commonwealth and certain citizens (if not all citizens to an extent). He did not introduce himself to Sanctuary to make friends or roots. So when he gets stuck there under the SoSu's "orders" (not letting him rot in sorrow in some random bunker) he doesn't have any comfort or companionship, in fact, I think he has more tensions and beef tbh.

I imagine the first weeks or even a month or two were rough. I don't think it is stated enough that like Danse went to that bunker intending to follow Brotherhood protocols and kill himself. SoSu may have convinced him not to in the moment but with someone like Danse, so rigid and stuck in an ideology even after it spits in his face, it's not unlikely he has a weird guilt about being alive at first. It doesn't help that I know in my heart that a few of the more petty or insensitive companions or settlers would tease him about it (playful meanness) thinking he was adjusting well (or not caring) to the Sanctuary life and coming to terms with his identity. Sometimes they go too far and it's easy to tell he's gotten back into the headspace, looking at his reflection, trying to remember concrete dates for his memories, etc..

I have this head canon that SoSu recognized this pattern as they had to have immense survivor's guilt (especially after being in Kellogs brain) about surviving the vault. They had the same idea about making things "fair" for the other vault dwellers and Shaun was the only thing between them and those thoughts for a while. For the first weeks it was a lot of SoSu monitoring him and making sure he was adjusting and not falling back into that thinking, y'know the whole "I am a disgrace and abomination against the Brotherhood and humanity. The only thing I can do to no longer sully the honor of either is to kill mys-" Like stopping that with minor distractions.

It would be a lot of small work and building projects and patrols for lost scavengers or to make sure no one is stalking the place. It's nice for him for a while, he's getting social interaction and he's not dead in the eyes of at least one Brotherhood member, especially one of as high rank as the SoSu. But it's also really unhealthy. Danse was trained and raised in a militaristic pseudo-religious faction. As much as there seemed to be casualness towards comrades there was a strict structure and order. He shoves the SoSu into that role and probably gets nick-named as their shadow during this period.

They are his only goal as he has nothing else and it shows bad. The rest of the settlement notices he trails after them and only really does his own thing when it's part of a task he was doing for, with or assigned by the Sole survivor. It's not an obsession with them specifically but he has lost his entire understanding of life and this is the one thing that stayed concrete. He does what he's asked of because following the Sole survivor has at least kept him belonging somewhere and why mess that up?

I am sure SoSu is not oblivious and is actively trying to figure out how to get Danse to start socializing and trying to actually settle into the community but for the time being Danse would treat himself like the machine he perceives himself as; Overworking himself as he believes machines don't need the same amount of rest, isolating himself and mostly trying to not have a mental breakdown every time he get into the power armor that is very much not his issued Brotherhood of Steel tech. He openly does this in respect of the General who hates it and makes everyone else uncomfortable.

this was very long just to say I think Danse just works himself to the bone all day and purposely puts thoughts in his already fragile psyche that everyone hates him and only tolerates his presence to not seem Synth-phobic and the Sole survivor's favor.

[catsushinyakajima]

hey hey I finished reading your "the adults are talking" and you WRECKED ME, like I genuinely don't think you could understand how absolutely ripped apart and splayed open I was. I was crying thick sob tears and putting the fic down, just to pick it back up and immediately start crying again. happened like 4 times.

you wrote it so, so wonderfully, and truly captured insecure Lance in a way that broke me. the characterization in each paladin member was distinctive and fit in the scenario, from their emotional reactions, to their outward displays, to the unique patterns of their speech (and even writing, for Keith n Lance). I loved how you wrote Keith and Lance, but I also absolutely loved the scene where Shiro talks to Lance, cause FUCK, it fucking hurt but was SO in character for him. devastating blow.

also the idea is so perfect? especially for langst?? and executed even more perfectly????? the pacing carried the emotion through it, never too rushed or slow, it was just... perfect.

anyways I'm currently reading through the other KL fics you've got and immensely enjoying the experience, but I needed to tell you how much this fic got to me. you wonderful wonderful writer 🙏

quick link to fic before my response: https://archiveofourown.org/works/59321800

HI HI OKAY SO-

*hands you a tissue for your tears* sorry?? I suppose?? But also your welcome?? I suppose??

It means so much to me that you like my work. Like so much. I'm like squirming with excitement, which is not good because it's causing my laptop to connect/disconnect from charging repeatedly (my charger is weird idk and my laptop's on my lap).

I can never tell how my writing is perceived to others because I'm so used to my words so every time I read it I'm like "okay....ig??" So this is great confirmation that my writing does NOT SUCK THANK YOU!! Thank you very much. It means a lot to my writer heart.

I think speaking is such a valuable and preferred method of communication to Lance. More than having a lot on his mind to say, I think it is a way for him to genuinely connect with people and he puts a lot of weight into his words and the words of people around him (especially if those words are directed at him). I'd like to think that its importance to him is a double edged blade. There are positives such as treasurable interactions, being able to express himself, having a thriving social life, etc. But there are also negatives like over-picking people's words or lack thereof, worrying about saying the wrong thing or too much/too little, putting so much value into his words that it starts to feel meaningless, etc. I wanted to play with the balance between these factors and that's how I came up with this fic!

I'm glad that the way I portrayed his thoughts and feelings resonated with you. I struggle with similar anxieties and it was very natural for me to write Lance's perspective in this fic, so I understand why it would feel personal. I hope that you are never in a situation where uh...you get zapped and your voice box gets paralyzed so you can't speak and are in imminent pain?? But in all seriousness, there is importance to yourself and your words no matter what you or others lead you to believe. Similar to the way I didn't realize the extent of the impact my fic had on people, you might not realize the impact you have on other people. Exhibit A: Your message to me was genuinely so kind and every single sentence you took the time to write means so much to me. I'm definitely coming back to this ask whenever I'm feeling down.

On another note, I feel so bad for making you cry that I'm thinking of writing a Lance Fluff fic to make up for it. What would that be called? If there's Langst, then would that be L' Fluff? Lafluff? L' Hurt/Comfort? If you have any requests or ideas let me know because I'm writing it with you in mind- no pressure, though.

Anyways see you around! I hope you have a good day and week and month and forever and read more good KL fics! Once again, thanks so much for reading!

[highonmarvel]

Restless Heart [1] | Tricks

♩Steve Kemp

You thought you were dark, and you are, but the charming surgeon you’re becoming addicted to is testing the extents of your morality.

content warning: this is a dark fic, and this series explores taboo topics such as abuse and assault, abduction, deteriorating mental health and mental illness, graphic depictions of gore. Think of a trigger warning: it applies to my work.

addition content warnings here!

“I just don’t eat animals.”

People are generally vegetarian for two main reasons: health or ethics. Steve is a doctor, and evidently in very good shape, so maybe it was to do with that, but you guessed it was probably some moral reasoning. You nearly make a comment, want to ask, “So you don’t eat men?” but you manage to bite that back as you swallow down some chicken.

You nod, and he seems to anticipate your apology as he quickly assures you he doesn’t mind you. You had tried to be vegetarian once, when you were younger and so much more golden, and sweet, and never wanting to hurt a fly, but you abandoned that in less than two weeks, and grew out of that sunshine view. You aren’t super edgy or the “fuck everything” type, no, you just understand that a person can not be good 100 percent of the time, and you have grown to accept that. You know you aren’t holy, and that’s freeing, in a sense, makes you feel safer exploring darker thoughts, only on your own, though. It’s amazing to be at terms with oneself, it’s the ultimate peace.

“Hey, so, I was thinking…” Steve starts, setting down his fork, “If you’re up for it, we should go on, like, a trip or something.”

How long had you known him? Long enough to not think twice about hopping in his car. Or maybe it hadn’t been that long and he’s just the most addictive drug in the world. Steve is heroin personified—not even, actually, it’s so much stronger than that; the desire to be as close to him as physically possible is so overwhelming you have no idea how by any miracle you have managed to stay seated across from him at the table.

“What did you have in mind?” you try as a casual question, maybe a little playful, but even you can tell it’s not convincing. You’re not necessarily shy, maybe a little awkward, but not cowering at the thought of social interactions, but with Steve, there’s just something. Fuck, his defined jawline, smart sense of humour (despite a little awkward charm—in fact, that nerdy attractiveness may benefit him), and his high-inducing touches. He melts down your stubborn persona to a blushing schoolgirl with just a half smile. He knows, he has to, but he’s never mocked you for it. Is that something you would be into?

“A surprise, if you’re up for it.”

You’re up for anything.

The next evening, you’re at his home; it’s huge and gorgeous. You remember wondering if he had a wife and kids when you first started seeing him, but now a little more so—why would he have such a big home just for himself?

“You really don’t have a wife?” you ask, peering down one of the long corridors.

He laughs from another room, and you follow the comforting sound over to a sunken living area. He gestures to your glass on the end table of the couch opposite of him. You settle down and lift the glass to him before bringing it to your lips.

“I don’t,” he insists with a smile, taking a sip of his drink.

You don’t even remember what you asked for, but you drink it anyway, because it’s from Steve. It’s a little tangy, but not too strong, lingers on your tongue and coats your throat.

You hear your name called in a familiar voice. You lift your suddenly incredibly heavy head to look up at Steve; he has his left arm draped over the back of the couch, and his right forearm laying on his thigh, holding the glass seated on his knee.

“Why’re you sitting so far away?”

What a good question. You stand, and even though you attempt to do so slowly, you still rise way to fast, and the fancy wooden floor sways underneath you as you grip your head to stop it from falling forward. You take a step, and you’re out.

♡

You stir to consciousness but keep your eyes shut, turning over and pulling a thin blanket over your shoulder. But something doesn’t feel right. The light shining on you is too warm a colour, the sheet over you is as crisp as a hospital blanket, and it feels like you’re laying on the floor.

Your eyes rip open and you try to sit up with shaking arms providing little support. The wall opposite you is painted with blue and purple and yellow as a beach sunset despite the air of despair about the room.

Your attention is drawn at the sound of ice clinking against glass, finding Steve taking a sip of a drink, seated in a chair by a door.

“Steve?” you ask, trying to stay as calm as possible, “What’s happening?”

He lets out a breath, and says, “I’m gonna tell you but you’re gonna freak out.”

He looks down at you with a glint that could be slight boredom or amusement, and you struggle to properly read the situation.

You look down to your right, where a thick leather bracelet covers your skin, connected to a chain of silver looped through a hook in the ground.

“Take this off, please,” you ask between uneven breaths.

“I can’t do that.”

“Take. It. Off.”

“I. Can’t. Do that.”

He sets his glass down and stands up, causing you to immediately retreat into the corner.

“Don’t!” you shriek, kicking the sheets towards him in your attempt to cower, “Don’t touch me!”

“I’m standing right here,” he responds, holding his hands like he’s unarmed.

“Oh my God, oh my God,” you begin hyperventilating, your body tensing and chest restricting as he crouches before you, “… Are you going to rape me?”

He tilts his head in disappointment and drops his voice, “Why would you ask me something so ugly?”

“Oh my God, oh my God…” you begin again, over and over like a prayer to heaven as he tries to speak to you.

“I like you, and I’m not going to rape you. Listen to me, very carefully,” he says, calm but authoritative, but you continue with your panicked three words over and over again before he yells your name.

“There she is,” he gives a tight-lipped half-smile, like he’s trying to be comforting but doesn’t have the patience for it, “I’m gonna sell your meat, and your hair, and get a lot of money for it. I’m not gonna kill you… right away… because the fresher the meat, the better. I’m not gonna kill you… unless you act up.”

His words are hardly registering in your mind as your eyes dart around the room, looking for any escape points.

“It’s great here, and I’ll cook for you! I’m a great cook,” he steps back and gestures around him, turning to look at the mural on the wall, giving you time to prepare to stand, “And by the way, look at the sunset—”

You yell as your charge towards him, clawing at him with your left hand and trying desperately (and in vain) to pull your right free. He easily steps back from your attack and you swipe at air, leaping further to try to get to him but being tugged back by your restraint.

He manoeuvres himself around you and sweeps you off your feet by gripping your waist, either ignoring your thrashing or used to this response, expertly managing to lay you down as if he’s done it many times before.

His breathing is slightly heavier when he steps over you and makes his way to the door, but you can’t tell if that’s because he’s angry or if your tantrum took him a little more effort (still barely anything, though).

“Behave.”

He leaves you with that. The cage-like wooden door slides shut and an electronic noise from a keypad let’s you know it’s locked.

♡

There are two other women in the basement, Penny, and someone else, resigned to their fate, and you fear you’ll soon become like her, giving up once you’ve had enough taken from you. You can’t have been in the basement for more than a few days, only managing to keep track of time by the three meals Steve delivers you a day. At first you tried to lunge at him, but he didn’t even drop the bowl of cereal he brought down, promising he’d make you a better breakfast the next morning because he had something to take care of; you soon found out that something was the nameless woman whose cell was furthest from you seeing as she was taken away screaming and never returned.

You refused to eat the next meal he delivered, and he encouraged you for a bit but didn’t press too hard before leaving. When dinner rolled around, your temper had been building all day but you had tried to bite your tongue out of fear; you had learnt Steve was a man of his word, and even if you believed he liked you, you just as well believed he wouldn’t hesitate to kill you. Part of you was curious, however, as to how he had managed to keep this up for what you presumed to be years given his expertise without getting caught or even suspected, and the thought made you choke on a sob that you played off as a cough, remaining careful under his gaze. You had learnt Penny didn’t have many friends and family that she had become distant to, similar to yourself, and the thought of all the women who disappeared into thin air without so much as a news call made your stomach twist: you would be one of those women now.

When he set the tray down, you knocked the food aside and tried to scratch at his torso but his thick sweater kept you from it.

“You know,” he said as he sat crossed-legged on the floor only a little bit away from you after you had effectively tired yourself out with trying to get a single hit at him for what felt like an hour, “I knew you were batshit crazy pretty early on.” Your eyes snapped up to him as he casually admitted what you’d been trying so hard to hide for the few weeks you had been dating him. Admittedly, your erratic nature was something you’d eventually stopped trying to hide as you grew up finding the harder you tried, the more explosive you would become when the secret was inevitably revealed, but you really wanted to try keep some sanity about you, at least until you got to know him a little better and were secure in the knowledge it would be at least a little harder for him to leave you than it was in the early days.

“Like, bite-your-dick-off insane. It made me wonder how you’d react to this, if you’d be as violent as I see you are now, or maybe you’d see the appeal.”

“I’d mind it less if you were doing this to men, but you said you ‘don’t eat animals,’ so I guess that rules your kind out.”

He let out an amused exhale through his nose and bit his lip to keep himself from smiling too wide.

That had to have been a few days ago, though you can’t really be sure seeing as he had stopped bringing meals down for a bit after your tantrum, and you were left to scream out your frustrations on your own until you fell asleep. You didn’t hear him come down for Penny either and eventually the conversation between you two had fizzled out. You wanted to leave the mess to spite him but it started smelling rancid and you had to clean up the cell to stop yourself from vomiting even more than you already wanted to.

Finally, the basement door creaks open, and your heart starts beating fast, but you can’t tell if you’re excited to see him or dreading the reason he’s coming down. You’re prepared to swing at him again despite your many failed attempts, but you’re also so hungry you’re not willing to risk going without another meal.

“I need a shower,” you say the second he appears in the cell doorway.

“Hello to you too,” he responds dryly, but his demeanour is cooler than you want considering your emotions are running so high you feel you’ll die if you don’t lash out. Maybe it’s because you’ve missed a few doses of your medicine, but you swear you must have hallucinated his response as being positive when he leans down to unclasp your wrist and you flex your hand to get some feeling back into it.

You rise unsteadily to your feet, unsure if this is a dream or a test, but step out the cell when he motions you ahead of him. He closes the door and grips your bicep as he urges you forward, his hold not hard but firm enough to let you know he is still in control. You feel like a newborn deer and you walk down the corridor, seeing daylight for the first time and wobbly on your legs. Running is not an option, he’d catch you instantly and maybe kill you on the spot, but maybe you can distract him.

You turn suddenly and slash at his face with a roar, trying to claw his eye out. You manage to scratch his face and he’s startled enough to drop your arm in favour of cupping his injured cheek. Maybe the smarter thing to do would have been to run to the kitchen and grab a knife, snatch a lamp from the side table, a vase on the mantle, find a weapon of any kind, but in your fury you lunge at him, managing to jump onto his back and continue trying to rip his eyes out, screaming as your nails scrape against his forehead, but he catches your wrists to stop you. You wrap your legs around his waist repeatedly kicking your heel into his thigh as you try to land a kick at his crotch, but he suddenly falls backwards and you hit the ground with a cry as your back collides with the hard wooden floorboards. Pain shoots down your spine and you try to prop yourself up onto your forearms but are forced to fall backwards with a cry when what feels like white hot searing fire shoots across your nerves.

Steve stands with a foot on either side of your body, blocking the sunlight which you were just getting used to as he towers over you. Despite the few red marks across his face and a little blood running down some of them, he seems too calm for the situation, quickly able to regain a normal breathing pace after your attack. He leans down and grips your neck, pulling your face a little closer to his.

“Bad girl,” he whispers, the last thing you hear before your head is slammed into the floor and you blackout.

♡

Your limbs feel unnaturally heavy when you slowly stir to consciousness, struggling to open your eyes and feeling your lashes stick together every time you manage to part your lids just a little. The sound of ‘80’s pop music vaguely runs through your clouded mind, along with Steve’s humming. You recognise the song, Restless Heart, that you and Steve had danced to, and now he played the same special moment while you were… on his operating table? You groan as you finally manage to pry your eyes open, almost blinded by the bright white lights shining down on you.

“Steve…” you mumble, trying to shift a little from laying on your belly. You register a thin blanket covering only the upper half of your body and somehow manage to feel self conscious despite the horrifying implication of what he’s doing to you.

“What…” you want to ask ‘What are you doing?’ but you’re unable to get your tongue to move as it sticks to the roof of your dry mouth.

Steve seems to understand when he comes into your sightline and answers, “I’m taking your ass.”

It takes a moment for you to comprehend his words before you hear soft metal clattering, undoubtedly the sound of surgical tools as he moves around the room behind you, singing along with Peter Cetera to the song that was once a reminder of the happiest you’ve ever been, and now a macabre ballad to the worst moment of your life—at least thus far.

“No… no…” you mumble as your eyes well with tears.

“You broke my trust, honey. There’s got to be consequences. I wouldn’t quite say you did a number on me, but you certainly could have, and I can’t have that happening again, now, can I?”

“Steve, stop,” you manage to mutter, your throat dry.

“You see, I don’t mind you, I nearly admire the fight you put up when I come visit you, but it’s not so fun when you try to trick me when I’m doing something nice for you.”

Does he really think letting his captive have a shower is something nice?

“I’m not taking much,” he continues, and if you could think straight you would hate that this more talkative side of him comes out when he’s at his most evil. “You’ll be fine, and you’ll be lucky. And I’m a doctor, remember? But listen,” he sets his tools down and walks over to you, blocking the light as he lowers his voice, “If you ever try something like this again, you’ll lose a limb.”

You sobs slowly die out as you feel yourself slipping into unconsciousness again, the last words you hear being Steve yelling in time with the music, “Don’t leave me here with my restless heart!”

♡

When you wake up on the thin mattress back in hell, you sigh deeply as you consider how to even handle yourself. Now that the shock and anaesthesia has worn off, your back hurts more than ever, and not knowing the condition your ass is in, you wonder if you could use the toilet, even if you managed to pull yourself up. You feel frustrated and defeated, now knowing that when Steve comes around, you won’t even be able to try to assault him, futile as your attempt may be. Though you know your hotheaded decisions are more than unlikely to ever be successful, trying at least gave you some sort of power, or at least the illusion of it.

As you lay on your stomach, feeling your heartbeat through your ribs and against the floor, you can’t help but feel like you’ve a restless heart of your own. You want to kill Steve, you genuinely want to murder him, and painfully at that, you even want to torture him; you want to take one of his butcher knives and slash his dick off, shove it into his mouth and hack at his throat over and over again until his head lolls down the stairs. Or maybe you should repeatedly stab him, make sure he feels every tear until you land a dagger in his restless heart.

And… you almost like it. You almost like being able to get years of anger out and having a valid excuse as to why, you like the idea of being able to murder someone and it being justified. If you can survive this, you’ll have the chance to play out all your sick fantasies with the cover of self defence, you can finally unleash your darkest desires, on someone who deserves it.

♩

} next chapter: Painkiller

my beloved taglist: @cowboysnbugs, @buckys-wintersoldier, @cjand10

[hulloitsdani]

Give some headcanon on if Kiran from fire emblem heroes would interact with the fallen heroes in the order especially someone like fallen nergal let's say nergal won't left unscathed

Especially if Alfonse is nearby or godforbide is lif

Sure! Unfortunately, I have not played Blazing Blade, so I’m not too familiar with Nergal as a character. I recall his appearance in Forging Bonds being fun, but ultimately I don’t know enough about him to comment on the potential on that specific dynamic. I shall leave those headcannons to you, my friend. However, I do think about fallen/antagonistic heroes a lot.

I believe this came up with a lot of 3 houses characters, but it’s commented on how those summoned by Kiran can’t harm anyone else they’ve also summoned. No hero on hero violence. It’s how you get the mildly hilarious dynamic between Chrom, Robin, Lucina, and Grima. They cannot physically harm each other, so it’s time for psychological warfare! Kinda! It’s in the form of a heated philosophy discussion, because Grima is not as good at this as he thinks he is. It’s delightful.

But, let’s think about that critically for a second. Kiran can control who Grima, a god of ruin and despair, can harm. And Grima is, notedly, intelligent— he most definitely tested the extents of this limitation. Especially when Chrom was off waxing poetic on how the strength of human connection can change fate again. He definitely tried, but he can’t kill anyone this bumbling imbecile doesn’t approve of. No one can. It’s part of the contract every hero is immediately put under and none have managed to break it. This safety precaution presumably also extends to themself and their allies.

Meaning, Kiran does not need any type of protection. Kiran is the one in control here.

Hell, they’re in control of people who have NEVER had the tables turned on them like this. And THATS the fun part of fallen/villain units. I personally love the Grima and Kiran dynamic, because this near all powerful being is now chained to and has to protect this normal guy. But that’s hardly the only variant of this. For example, if I’m recalling correctly, there’s a forging bond involving Kronya from FE3H, in which she talks about why she is more than content to fight for the Order. It’s violence without any drawbacks. Sure, the heroes are given shelter, food, money, compensation, and yadda yadda yaaaa. But the real perk? You can’t die here, kid. As long as that tactician is around, you can run wild. And they don’t give a damn about the violence enacted, as long as the job gets done. Askr is a beautiful bloody battlefield on loop, and all the violent sickos get to partake with no risk to themselves. What more could she possibly want?

That is mostly conclusions Kronya personally came to, but I imagine Kiran subtly nudged her into that line of thinking when giving the initial pitch. Took one good look at her and knew not to try to appeal to the moral goodness of her heart when asking her to fight for Askr. Kiran is good at people managing, in that way. Has done enough customer service for that to come pretty naturally. As a result, they are the glue that keeps the Order running on a social level. Which, to be clear, is a testament to their skill. They are genuinely very charming and use that to make would be villains into willing helping hands.

As for the Askr trio’s reactions to this, it varies, but no one can argue with the results. Anna will, on occasion, give them a hubris check. Although she has learned to trust their capabilities, she remains the most skeptical and is the one needing to be convinced when Kiran summons a new feral raccoon with rabies to fight in their army. Mr. Told Death He’d Kill Her In A Week is far more down for this and is rather intrigued on how Kiran managed to convince said raccoon to listen to them. (Parental validation apparently. A lot of these guys have daddy issues.) Sharena, meanwhile, brings up the glaring obvious moral trolley problem??? You guys???? Having these morally dubious heroes as part of the Order is a powerful boon, but it would also make their cruelty a fundamental part of the Order of Heroes. So maybe some critical thought should be put behind that before launching fallen Ike at Freya full speed. The other three then all awkwardly look at each other as they realize that did not occur to them in the slightest. Whoops. This is why Sharena is an indispensable part of the Order. Thank you and good night!

[wannaeatramyeon]

Here for DG crumbs 🥹

with a non fighter, average reader like she is average and doesn't have much that stands out to her and is a dg simp. She simps hard for this man. Not a toxic or psycho fan but a supportive one

It would make my day if you could do this really! We need more dg content!!🤧

Oh right! it could be James with an average non fighter s/o as well

Thank you for reading ❤️

Ask and ye shall receive, here's a strangers to lovers (which turned out quite lengthy...)! Did this fandom just make me like DG? This plain noodle man?!

DG x Reader: Stranger to Lovers

Half fic, half hc. A normal reader comes across DG

DG came across you on one of his lonelier nights.

He knows he shouldn't be reading articles and posts trashing him, but curiosity killed the cat.

His ego is feeling uncharacteristically bruised until he comes across your comment.

You're sweet, supportive and understanding of how hard it can be in the public eye. It cheers him up that some fans still see him as human.

He takes note of your social media name but doesn't take it any further.

Fate brings you together at a fan event (actually no, your meet and greet tickets did) but the first thing that draws DG to you is your eye contact.

He's met many fans and almost all of them avoided looking at him and were giggly and shy. It's to be expected. You are the first one that looked at him squarely head on.

You didn't go crazy or ask for a lock of his hair (like some of the other more wild fans), but thanked him for what he doing in the industry.

You're articulate even as pink dusts your cheeks.

And then you kept talking and you repeat what he read that night.

He files away that info for later.

When DG finally has his moment of peace, he quickly taps in that username in the hopes that it's you.

It is.

The same person in the profile pic that posted the kind comment is also who he met mere hours ago.

It brings a little smile to his face.

Another lonely night, without any practice schedules, PTJ Entertainment issues or James Lee loose ends meant DG had time on his hands.

He's spent enough time looking through your profile and posts over the past couple weeks, whenever he could grab a minute here or there.

You're pretty normal in every sense of the word, a world removed from DG and James Lee.

He couldn't stop thinking about the idea of you.

Biting the bullet, and using a pseudonym, he sends you a message - starting a conversation based on something you last posted about.

He receives a reply within the next 20 minutes and that was that.

The hours turn into days turn into weeks turn into months.

DG finds himself stealing time so he could respond back to you.

He lets you in on vague details about his life and you tell him all about yours.

In another life, he thinks he could have been similar to you. Normal. With normal hobbies and interests. Normal issues and headaches. Normal family and normal friends.

A normal past and normal future.

You're a golden ray of truth and light cutting through his secrecy and darkness.

DG finds himself wearing a coy smile more and more from your interactions, from your late night 3am messaging and your 'good mornings' and everything inbetween.

It doesn't go unnoticed. To the extent that rumours float around that he has found a special someone. He abruptly and coldly shoots that down.

But unable to hold back anymore, one morning he asks if you want to meet up.

DG knows how it sounds: meeting a stranger (a strange man). But he feels a bond with you, one he's never had before, and hopes you feel the same way.

The minutes until your response dragged and stretched.

Until you finally put 'Ok'.

He could feel your hesitation across the screen. Usually so full of life and excitement and emotion, this simple one worded response isn't like you.

He backtracks but you're now the one insisting.

A date and location is set.

In a quiet coffee shop, set away from the main street but popular enough to not be too secluded, DG finally meets you in person again.

Did he truly think you were normal the first time he met you? How odd.

Because now he finds you radiant, beaming, glittering. Like sunshine, like moonlight.

Anything but normal.

He calls you over, and your eyes light up as you go to meet him.

You greet him by his username, but freeze when he pulls his mask down. That face would be recognised by all of Seoul.

"DG?!"

This meet up doesn't last long.

You flee in embarassment, having spilled all your secrets to one of the most famous man in South Korea as he kept his identity and life hidden away from you.

DG understands how you must how felt, the mortification. And the deception as he hid the biggest secret from you most of all.

He sits with his head in his hands.

DG doesn't hear from you for a few days, and the distance and silence feels cavernous.

It hits him like a truck that over time, you became his confidant, his best friend. Someone he could talk to and feel like a person.

He is the first one to reach out and he apologises.

He says what he can about his life, his current life. Hoping that this makes it up to you somehow.

That he promises to be truthful to you, where he can, but there are still some things he's not ready to say.

That he understands you feeling betrayed he kept his identity secret, especially during all those times you unknowingly gushed about how much you liked him.

That even though it was fair to keep his identity a secret, he should have told you as soon as it was appropriate. A lot sooner than at the cafe.

That this was something he started because of his ego, but continued because he likes you.

That he's never felt this closeness with anyone else.

That he's not sure if anyone has ever seen him properly as a person. Until you.

That he would like a second chance. Please.

Hope against hope, you eventually respond.

You ask to meet again in the same place.

In a quiet coffee shop, set away from the main street but popular enough to not be too secluded, DG meets you in person for the third time.

DG waits, anxiously fiddling with a bouquet of roses. He never does this.

You enter, and illuminate the room.

This time DG calls you over, and you give him a shy smile

He presents the bouquet, and you accept.

You become the starlight guiding and comforting him during the lonely nights.

[brain-amoeba]

sorry I've been dead lately friends >_< work and life beating my ass, I'm just super exhausted and have no motivation to write but I must feed my children:

More Random HCs: Sniper x Reader

-It may be a little frustrating at first trying to get closer to our favorite Aussie--he's very standoffish and quiet

-For a loooong time, you have no idea where you stand with him--other than just acquaintances--because the extent of your interactions with him never even consist of actual words. You usually are met with a stiff smile or tip of the hat in response to your eager waves "hello" and greetings.

-Your efforts don't go unnoticed, though--all the times you've made a point to greet him before anyone else, make sure he's taken care of, and your adorable attempts to socialize with him--he remembers ALL of it.

-in fact, he finds himself daydreaming and replaying those moments with you in his head when he's having a rough day--but his cold exterior would never give that away.

-Part of him feels guilty for not reciprocating--it's not that he doesn't like you, no, he just doesn't know how to properly respond or do something in return that will make you feel just as special and important as you make him feel--hes worried if he opens his mouth, he'll scare you off. So until he figures that out, he'll keep his distance (much to your dismay).

-Slowly, he decides to see how far he can get with you--those nods and smiles soon turn into "G'day, roo" and invitations to watch him at target practice.

-It takes a long time for him to finally warm up to you, but boy do all your weeks, even months of patience really pay off, because once he lets his guard down for you there's no turning back. He would go to the ends of the earth for you, give his life to keep you safe, and cherishes every little interaction with you as if it were the last--all while you have literally no idea, because he still retains his cold, distant personality.

-He just gets a little bit warmer around you, though :).

[captain-crowfish]

bothering you with questions! there's so much stuff on your blog, who are your favorite characters? do you have a top 5? why them?

Heyhey howdy! 5 favorite characters... hmm... Well honestly my favorites (for the most part) change like, every other week. But I'll attempt this, and hey, I feel like having a bit of fun with this list, so why not? Also I'm limiting myself to one character per media.

5 of my favorite characters (I know you said top 5 but I'm doing this in no particular order):

1

Eda The Owl Lady (The Owl House/2020-2023)

Although not the protagonist, I can't shake the feeling that Eda is one of the most important characters in modern animated television, mainly in regards to what she represents; Found family, chronic illness, disability, non-conformity~ But aside from that, I love her episodes! I always look forward to her interactions with other characters because she is always just OOZING with personality.

2

Nimona (Nimona/2023)

Speaking of representation~ Of course, representation, metaphorical or not is one thing, a memorable personality is another. If I could describe her in one word, it would be CHAOTIC. But in the best way. She is GLEEFULLY chaotic, but how could she not be? She stands out from all the other characters in this film, both demeanor and ability-wise, but she doesn't really have a choice, she embraces, to an extent, her role as a villain in society because 1), It doesn't allow her to be anything else, and 2), destroying the property and pride of her oppressors is SOOOO satisfying.

Also her gruesome nature fondly reminds me of Winnifred from Boxtrolls speaking of which...

3

Archibald Snatcher (The Boxtrolls/2014)

HAHA IT'S HIM IT'S THE GUY I FEEL VERY NORMAL ABOUT THIS ONE IN PARTICULAR Now, I feel like, normally when people say "favorite character", the first assumption about that person's feelings toward said character is generally "Aw yeaaah! Go character! I want them to succeed in everything!" NO! NOT THIS ONE! STAPPIT! BAD! Nonono, he's not my favorite because I inherently thought "wow that's a cool character", I used to not like him! I used to think he was terrifying! And I'm not saying he isn't terrifying, both in design and motives, but at some point I begun to ask myself the question, "why?" Why are you a bane to my existence yet simultaneously the most fun I've had thinking about anything in a long, long while? And I think I figured it out, You know what else is terrifying? The fucking circumstances he was forced to live under! And that in no way makes any of his political manipulation, scapegoating and attempted genocide excusable, nothing excuses his actions! But GodDAMN if the movie he's in isn't a gut-wrenching depiction of what pushes a man over the edge! If I were to say "Snatcher is the victim!" The general reaction would probably be "NUH-UHHHH!!!!" And you'd be correct, Almost! Because both him and Eggs come from almost the same place of oppression! they are LITERALLY at the bottom of the social ladder, and both of them have to fight their way out! Snatcher brought himself up by turning Boxtrolls, the only class below him, into a scapegoat, and turning the entire public against them (read: attempted genocide). And if anyone reading is wondering about my thoughts on his Drag Persona: It's his main form of escapism! If he gets to be flamboyant, lavish, a functioning propaganda preacher, and actually have some positive attention from (and maybe flirty interactions with) Lord Portley-Rind, who is he to turn that opportunity down? Eggs on the other hand, brings himself up by taking down the upper class(es) and their LITERAL machine of oppression Violence against minorities is what makes Snatcher the primary villain of the film, although arguably Lord Portley-Rind is an even bigger antagonist as he upholds the system that turned Snatcher into what he is, a system that he's still not intelligent enough to question, as he think he can win it by playing their game! Boxtrolls is a fucking "Leopards ate my face" movie and I toss and turn every night wondering WHY I even BOTHER thinking about it so hard when no one else will? It's not just because I think he's hot, guys, I promise.

4

Junior (Storks/2016)

Guys... I really don't know why I've been watching this movie so much recently. I kind of hate the fact that I love such a stupid fun movie about birds working for not-Amazon and something something family is more valuable than work and corporations. Funny bird movie. Yea I love the silly haha funny bird baby movie. I think about haha stupid bird movie a lot. I have it on Blu-Ray now because I like the goofy bird movie.

5

Akhira (Wolves of The Mist/2013)

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh man this is gonna be a tough one... only because It's hard to get media more obscure than "10-year-old animated xenofiction series from youtube that has been almost entirely wiped from the internet" But man.... I love Wolves of The Mist. I STAN Wolves of The Mist. I like Rosali but I STAN Akhira. You go girl.

[woooyeahbaby]

armin with an s/o with social anxiety <3

warnings: gender neutral reader // none really? i guess accidental self injury. i guess it’s also good to note that these are mostly based off of my own social anxiety triggers so it may not be fitting for all.

a/n : i’ll get to my levi requests in a bit i just felt like doing this cute little thing for now cuz i’m in an armin mood <3 rewatching season 4 just has me sooo!!! wahhh i love armin!!!

armin would be (even more of) an absolute sweetheart comforting you after a social interaction that made you uncomfortable, even if he didn’t see what you saw was wrong with it. he would tell you it’s okay, and that you didn’t do anything wrong, you looked fine, you weren’t acting weird, etc.

if he notices you accidentally hurting yourself (like biting your nails or lips, pinching yourself, scratching yourself) he would give you a little tap or a nudge, taking your hand and giving a comforting squeeze. he would reassure you, tell you nobody is staring, tell you you’re doing just fine, anything you need to hear? you don’t even have to request it from him, he knows.

if he notices that while you’re talking to somebody new and you’re obviously feeling very awkward, he’ll try to soothe you by rubbing your back, your thigh, or just holding your hand and rubbing the back of it with his thumb, and if you’d like he can take over the conversation for you by gently butting in (or just talking more if he was already part of the conversation).

if you’ve just done something embarrassing in front of a large group of people, like tripping over yourself, and he sees that you feel tense, he will try to take you to a more secluded spot and comfort you. he feels horrible that you feel so embarrassed and anxious to such an extent, and truly wishes he could help more.

when you two come home from a night out, he’ll reassure you about all the little things, but his favourite thing to reassure you of is how amazing you look. if the night out was all of the social battery you had for the next week or two? that’s fine by him, but he will try — and by try i mean try, not push — to get you to interact with people other than him just in an attempt to help. he loves you very much and wants to help you overcome your anxiety.

no matter how long it takes, armin will love you and help you through it.

[susagnon]

Eijirou's POV on the dynamic between Bakugou and Midoriya

Kirishima and Deku share quite a few significant characteristics: Both of them are among the sweetest kids in 1-A. Humble about themselves, but very open about their admiration for others. There is little doubt, that they also hold strong admiration for each other. Along with Uraraka and Asui, the two boys had to keep their involvement in the Shie Hassaikai raid a secret from the rest of their class for weeks. They prepared for the operation together, and went into the raid together.

However, I’m not sure where to place Midoriya from Kirishima's POV regarding their biggest commonality: Each of them has a significant personal tie to Bakugou, but very different ones.

Bakugou haters and apologists alike, have argued about class 1-A’s hypothetical reactions towards the true extent of Bakugou’s bullying of Deku (as well as whether those hypothetical reactions would be warranted or not) to death. I have no desire to get into that.

Nevertheless, I have wondered about Kirishima’s thoughts behind his canonical reaction towards Midoriya and Bakugou's interactions. Or more precisely, his lack of reaction throughout the series.

To contrast: There's one scene where Uraraka confronts Bakugou and point-blank asks him, why he treats Deku like dirt. I see this as a very brave act from Uraraka. Not because of who and how Bakugou is (crass at best, violent at worst, let’s not sugarcoat this), because I don’t think that he would have had physically attacked her for that, but because of the cultural context of Japan. It is very frowned upon to “meddle” in what people perceive to be others’ private business.

However, while I do share the opinion, that their relationship to each other is mainly Deku and Bakugou’s private business, I would not classify Uraraka confronting Bakugou with the negative connotations of meddling:

By being so openly hostile to Deku, Bakugou had already broken the social rule of keeping your private business, well, private, and not imposing your issues on others. His degree of unrestrained hostility towards Deku could have (or has it canonically?) very well disturb the entire group’s hero training overall.

In the present, Deku is Uraraka’s friend. And their mutual classmate is presently treating him like shit.

In my eyes, those two facts are reasons enough, for Uraraka to at least ask Bakugou a few questions.

One would think that those would be reason enough for Kirishima to confront Bakugou too. So why has neither he, nor any of the other 1-A kids done anything of significance in that direction?

Uraraka confronted Bakugou, and asked questions. To which he logically would have had to either be able to justify himself somehow, or cease his aggression towards Deku immediately. Naturally at that point, Bakugou does neither. He just leaves huffing and puffing. But people have to ask others such question, and not just as a throwaway remark (a half-hearted "Bakugou, calm down" doesn't count), to signal, that their treatment of others is not acceptable. Afterall, continuous disapproval can influence people to change their behaviour.

Even if one may interject that Kirishima is closer to Bakugou, than he is to Midoriya... that would only be more of an argument for Kirishima to intervene, as he has more emotional leverage over Bakugou than e.g. Uraraka.

And even with everything else aside, based on Kirishima’s overall characterization, one would have thought, that he would never be okay with his friend attacking another classmate repeatedly for no discernible legitimate reason.

The only tentative possible reason I could come up with, for why Kirishima never intervened here, is that to him, Midoriya had never seemed less capable than Bakugou from the very first day they all started at UA together. As in, Kirishima had never perceived any power disparity between Midoriya and Bakugou.

...

However, Kirishima and the rest of 1-A did witness, what Bakugou did to Deku during their first class assignment (All Might deserves criticsm for not interrupting that fight. He truly was a bad teacher... still isn't a good one). Even after that incident, Bakugou’s verbal aggression towards Deku still continued on for a while.

While Kirishima may not be emotionally intelligent to same degree that e.g. someone like Kaminari is implied to be, Kirishima is still sensitive to his peers’ feelings (see his reaction towards Tsu-chan's sadness after Kamino).

Furthermore, one must simply be blind and deaf to have missed Bakugou’s belligerency towards Deku - that lasted at least until they had beaten the crap out of each other and got grounded together.

As such, it can be safely inferred, that Kirishima (and the rest of 1-A) noticed that Deku and Bakugou had bad history with each other - and that the animosity came one-sidedly from Bakugou.

Either way. If I witnessed a peer being repeatedly put down by another, I would firmly and repeatedly tell the latter to knock it off, stfu, and get himself a therapist for his anger issues...

...

What did Kirishima see, when he looked at Midoriya, and everytime he witnessed how he was treated by Bakugou?

How did Kirishima justify it to himself, to not try harder to get his bestie to stop being a total dick to another friend/ a classmate?

After Bakugou apologized to Deku in front of all of 1-A, did Kirishima and the rest of the class ever wonder, what exact actions warranted such a gesture from someone as proud as Bakugou?

[rxttenfish]

Merfolk Relationship Hierarchy

Merfolk are hypersocial macropredators. This shouldn't be new information to anyone on my blog, but the sheer extent of merfolk sociability cannot be overstated. Their social nature is the entire reason they were able to become and specialize into macropredatory niches in the way that they have. Their close relatives, the leviathans, are an excellent example of what merfolk might have become if they didn't have their intense communal proclivities — being much more typical, expected examples of a secondarily aquatic large marine predator akin to marine reptiles of the past and whales of the present. Without their social bindings, merfolk might have entirely lost their hands for flippers, would lack their heightened connection to sound and language, and certainly wouldn't have shaped the ecosystems and the world they inhabit in the same way.

For this, merfolk relationships are complicated. They started as a way of forming a simple hunting group and handling life in large colonies, but as merfolk specialized further, so too did their relationships. More and more they focused on interpersonal politics and the complications of maintaining a large social group that was constantly evolving and shifting, which fostered the growth of their intelligence and sapience, which then led back even moreso into needing the ability to maintain and keep up with their relationships.

A merfolk in isolation is not a merfolk at all. While the exactness of this thought varies across their different cultures, it still holds true for all of them. On a literal level, merfolk can and do die of loneliness, their social needs as much of a requirement to them as the need for food or water. If you were to isolate a merfolk, to the point where they could not hear nor see anyone else, then they would endure a brutal one or two weeks, and then die. Every other need can be met, they can be otherwise entirely healthy, but without anyone else around, they cannot live.

On the more metaphorical level, a merfolk cannot exist solely on their own. Most merfolk cultures accept that the individual does not exist, and that there has to be some outside dialogue with other merfolk in order for them to even be alive. The self and identity are inherently plural to them, a multifaceted soul which exists in the bodies and lives of merfolk in a group, and which can't be broken down. Maintaining relationships and fostering them is as essential as feeding yourself, or feeding someone else.

For all of this, merfolk require much higher amounts of social interaction and connection. This is not to say that introverted merfolk do not exist, but they would be introverted by the measure of their fellow merfolk, and not by what humans might judge them to be. Much like how even the most introverted human could not endure the life of a solitary snake or spider, an introverted merfolk could not endure the life of an introverted human. Similarly, even an extroverted human could not compare against an extroverted merfolk.

Likewise, not every social interaction is the same to merfolk, and they maintain different emotional connections with different people, fulfilling a wider assortment of social needs. In fact, it is easiest to think of merfolk social structure as being like one large, interwoven, piece of lace, where each individual merfolk is represented by a single knot. They are all tied together into larger pieces, repeating patterns, all working together to create a singular, complex web of all the ways every merfolk is connected to every other merfolk.

For this, merfolk have different names for each different pattern, each different part at different scales and sizes. All are important, even if some are closer and tied nearer to the individual merfolk in question, and require greater maintenance to keep healthy.

These patterns and connections are, by far, what is most important to a merfolk. While merfolk are fully capable of experiencing platonic, familial, romantic, and sexual connections, it should be stated that this is not what the relationship hierarchy is based off of. They might be a part of that connection, but the connection itself and the place it occupies within the hierarchy is of far greater importance to a merfolk, to the extent that all else pales before it. Any point and connection within this web might be platonic, or familial, or romantic, but even a romantic connection to a merfolk might mean nothing against a platonic or familial connection if the latter outranks the former on their hierarchy of relationships.

Hence, from the smallest unit to the largest, this is (approximately) what the merfolk hierarchy of relationships looks like:

Yuu'itv + Ul’kiha

This can be thought of as the singular knot, as the individual merfolk themselves. This is what is most familiar to landfolk, as it typically does not refer to any more than one merfolk.

To the merfolk themselves, however, this is more theoretical and functional than a real part of their relationship hierarchy to be maintained. This is the building block of identity, the pieces which make up one true self, but pieces which are not as concerning or deserving of as much time as the selfhood itself.

The exception, as you might have noticed, is the inclusion of ul'kiha at this rung. Ul'kiha (in the common-technical language) is loosely translated as the water that runs through someone's gills, but in the plural. Less literally, it refers to a shared breath, a breathing as one. A shared body, in less flowery terms. Soulmates, in the easiest localization.

In short, an ul'kiha is another merfolk and individual who is so close to another merfolk that they are thought of as one person. A plural-becoming-singular, if you might. Other merfolk will treat two ul'kiha as the same person, talk to them as the same person, view their relationships to them as one person. It represents the tightest, closest bond any merfolk can have.

For this, ul'kiha are rare. Most merfolk will never take an ul'kiha in their lives, and for those that do, taking more than one is next to unheard of. Ul'kiha is, likewise, the only instance where a rung in the relationship hierarchy is solely romantic, and the only true crossover between the relationship hierarchy and humanity's views on relationships. While half of ul'kiha will refuse to take any other romantic partner, this is not comparable to marriage either, as the intensity of this connection could be thought of as codependent in a way that's natural for merfolk but doesn't occur in human relationships. While ul'kiha can split up, if one ul'kiha dies and the other doesn't, the living partner is expected to never take another ul'kiha again, and quite often the loss is enough to kill them too.

Miivt'ia

These are the first few knots the initial knot is tied to, and the first true rung on the relationship hierarchy.

In a sense, the miivt'ia is a merfolk's inner circle. These are the people who they are closest to in their lives, who they have a unique and potent bond with. A miivt'ia, likewise, is a group which is exclusive to itself, and all the members of a miivt'ia will feel the same way about each other, and count themselves in each other's miivt'ia.

The closest example we might have to what a miivt'ia is would be the concept of a friend polycule. None of the members inside a miivt'ia are exclusively platonic, familial, romantic, nor sexual with each other, but they have a tight and exclusive bond which is solely shared amongst each other. In fact, each member of the miivt'ia might feel differently about every other member of the miivt'ia and have their own, unique dynamic with every other member, but all are united in the closeness given by being members of the miivt'ia.

Miivt'ia are often formed right as a merfolk is first growing up. Family members can be included in the miivt'ia, but not always, and those included are almost always siblings, cousins, or others who are similarly close in age. Childhood friendships that begin to deepen often become a part of the miivt'ia, as are the most serious of relationships. However, miivt'ia can also be created outside of these formative years, and there are many miivt'ia that essentially act like guilds or a "family" business, being closer than mere coworkers but sharing the same job.

Miivt'ia are the people with whom a merfolk has near-constant contact with. They are expected to live together, and often will share the same job, or similar jobs. All of their personal belongings are considered as belonging to the miivt'ia over any individual, and legally the miivt'ia is the individual upon which laws apply to. A merfolk without a miivt'ia is effectively homeless, and spiritually merfolk consider the miivt'ia to be the soul. Merfolk that go through the Coral Festival (Habp'll pl'qe ane'jhe Oikahj) will go through it together with their miivt'ia. Any children the miivt'ia has or adopts is considered the child of everyone else in the miivt'ia, the members all acting as parents and considering themselves equally as responsible in the care for that child. Miivt'ia are not only expected to be constantly in contact with each other and to participate in everything together, but they are expected to care equally about every other member of the miivt'ia and to feel each other's emotions as one.

For all of this, merfolk are highly loyal to their miivt'ia and will defend the members of their miivt'ia with their life. Any threat to any other member of the miivt'ia is considered a direct threat to all other members and to the individual merfolk's lives, and the loss of any member of the miivt'ia is mourned by all others to the highest degree.

There is a lot of responsibility placed upon those included in the miivt'ia, but the miivt'ia also has an emotional closeness and intimacy that isn't shared by any other merfolk in the relationship hierarchy (except the ul'kiha, see above). Being too overtly close and intimate with a merfolk can be seen as not respecting the miivt'ia and be seen as a threat to the security of the miivt'ia. Likewise, if someone wishes to join a miivt'ia, they will often endure a "courting" phase with all the members of the miivt'ia, where they attempt to forge connections equally as close to and intimate with every other member.

Dhe'jny'p usae

If the miivt'ia was the smallest initial pattern any relationship can have in the larger weave, then the dhe'jny'p usae is the actual shape of that pattern, when something becomes not just an oval, but a petal on a flower.

Dhe'jny'p usae, in common-technical language, is closest translated to "drift family". Humans might recognize the dhe'jny'p usae as being something similar to friends. They are not as close as the miivt'ia, but they might represent the next nearest thing, being a close emotional connection with associated responsibilities. The dhe'jny'p usae would be the closest other miivt'ia to the existing miivt'ia, acting as neighbors or close-knit family. If the miivt'ia had children, then they would be expected to provide care and look after those children alongside their own, and would cycle wider, communal responsibilities with the miivt'ia. Miivt'ia and members of the miivt'ia would hang out with and spend a lot of time with their dhe'jny'p usae, and this forms the base of wider merfolk sociability.

While the dhe'jny'p usae would be excluded from the private, domestic matters of the miivt'ia, they might still be gone to for emotional reassurance, or to simply have someone to talk to. Dhe'jny'p usae are expected to help in providing food for each other, and will switch out communal duties that require a layer of intimacy with each other, and legally are considered very similar entities. While they wouldn't share all personal belongings like the miivt'ia, they might share what counts for money, and be responsible for dividing it up among themselves. Dhe'jny'p usae, likewise, might live together in larger communal houses and share chores among themselves, but this might be considered closer to the individual members of a household, and its not as intensely expected for them to live together as the miivt'ia.

Dhe'jny'p usae are likewise the most common place to find what we might think of as typical merfolk romantic relationships. Dhe'jny'p usae more easily come and go, leaving and entering a merfolk's life, not solely remaining there for life like the miivt'ia, and for that, it's not uncommon for merfolk to have romantic and sexual relationships with their dhe'jny'p usae.

Faa'nek hus'llu

If the dhe'jny'p usae were the equivalent to people living in the same house, the faa'nek hus'llu is closer to the neighbors. These are acquaintances, support-friends, those that they are close to, though they maintain a degree of separation. If the dhe'jny'p usae was a flower, then this is the daisy chain, the interlocking patterns which form a distinct function.

More than anything else, the faa'nek hus'llu can be thought of as the connective tissue. They bridge the gap between the intensely bound and closely connected dhe'jny'p usae and miivt'ia, and the wider social community of merfolk. They do not bear the brunt of the emotional responsibility and are free to come and go in any merfolk's life as they please, but there is still a degree of familiarity here, a sense of belonging. While dhe'jny'p usae might live in the same communal house, faa'nek hus'llu live in the same town, neighborhood, community. The responsibilities they bear are far more physical, often serving as shifting turns for communal guard or repair duties, ensuring that everyone gets their turn taking care of everyone else.

The downside is that faa'nek hus'llu enjoy far less emotional connection and intimacy. What is shared and offered is far more obvious and physical, and far less detailed than that which other, closer relationships would receive. They might know someone is tired, and they might know someone is in grief after losing a member of their miivt'ia, but they wouldn't be able to navigate the emotional complexity beneath that. Trying to do so can be seen as a threat, either to your own dhe'jny'p usae and miivt'ia, or to theirs, demanding familiarity which has not been earned nor received.

A'antiu Muur'l

This is the far end of any merfolk's immediate social connections. The a'antiu muur'l is not merely the knot, nor the petal, nor the flower, nor the daisy chain, but the sides of the lace itself, the largest part that fits together with all others.

This is the community as a whole. It is a town, a city, a city-block, more of a legal entity than a social one but a social one nonetheless. The a'antiu muur'l is far more location-based than the other rungs on the relationship hierarchy, and merfolk only truly change their a'antiu muur'l with a change of physical location. The a'antiu muur'l is the community from which community names are given, and the a'antiu muur'l is to the commonfolk what a royal lineage is to a royal.

The a'antiu muur'l in common-technical best translates to "song family", and to a merfolk, this is because it is intended to include everyone that a single merfolk might hear at any given time. They are strangers to the individual merfolk, sure, but they are all singing together and speaking at the same time, and working to build the same song together to flesh out life and the place in which they live, so there is a degree of emotional connection. It is abstracted emotional connection, yes, but it is emotional connection all the same.

Merfolk might even include physical landmarks as part of their a'antiu muur'l, such as in the case of their singing buildings, or for a particularly endearing local landmark. This can include a large reef, or mountain, or entire mountain range, but so too can it include the one weird shady area where all the kids hang out that the adults don't want them near.

Ghray Uw'ghta Faahl

In common-technical language, the ghray uw'ghta faahl means "all-body". It is far more theoretical than the others, being spoken of to promote a sense of universal connection, but is not something that's quite so easily envisioned in turn.

In essence, the ghray uw'ghta faahl refers to all merfolk. All of their connections, each a'antiu muur'l, each faa'nek hus'llu, each dhe'jny'p usae, each miivt'ia, and each yuu'itv. Each and every merfolk is included, down through time, because each and every merfolk has had an emotional connection, and thus each and every merfolk fits into the ghray uw'ghta faahl.

Thus, the responsibilities here are far more abstracted, and far more represent the responsibilities all merfolk have to each other. This includes their hospitality culture, yes, but far moreso it includes a sense a dignity and a need to recognize that each merfolk has someone else and belongs somewhere within the ghray uw'ghta faahl. It's a source of recognition, and of community, and of understanding.

How much it actually fulfills that role, as ever, varies, but the thought and theory and gesture is still there, all the same.

[unactivewaspsfics]

Hi, I saw that you were open for OW requests and was wondering if it was okay to request Hanzo with an introverted s/o? They like to relax at home more instead of going to parties and having a quiet life. Only going out sometimes for dinner or a movie/museum. How would their relationship start and how would he show affection? Thank you in advance! <3

Insecure Connection

A/N: RAHHHH TY FOR MY FIRST REQUEST <33 I tried my best and I do really hope you enjoy it anon! I haven't written for Hanzo or Requests so if I messed up don't feel scared to tell me where I messed up at! I put so much love into this omg </3 ALSO, if there isn't a said gender in a request I will try to not give any specified gender :) Ily and enjoy reading :D.

Pairing: Hanzo Shimada X Introverted S/O

Word Count: 1,195 words

How You Met / How Your Relationship Started:

Okay, so I feel like Hanzo would 100% of met you at an Aquarium, more specifically in the jellyfish exhibit. Hardly anyone is in there because of the dark but he admires the shapes, sizes, and the jellyfish themselves as they glow.

You saw he was, basically, the only other person there so you decided to join next to him and view The Box Jellyfish they had in a giant tank in the center of the exhibit. The two of you stood next to each other for, at least, 4 minutes. Each of you giving the other brief glances.

Hanzo took a deep breath, sensing how awkward this moment was, and decided to ask you, “So, which Jellyfish is your favorite?”. You smiled, replying with your favorite jellyfish, which the exhibit didn't have. You explained for a moment how you came all this way for a Jellyfish that wasn't even there. Hanzo nodded his head in agreement, replying with "I am so sorry... There must have been another reason you came here?".

You nodded, giving a small laugh before saying how when you were stressed, going to places like this would help calm you down. It was a kind of haven, no one really to bother you and it wasn't so overwhelming your social battery would go down quickly.

Hanzo agreed. "Social spaces also make me... anxious in a sense. I can't always be in them for too long. I am glad you understand what I go through." This interaction was the start of your friendship.

The two of you would spend the rest of the aquarium visit together, commenting briefly on the ocean life and similar experiences you may have. You never realized how much you could connect with someone out of online experiences like the way the two of you connected at this moment!

By the end of the visit, the two of you decided to exchange numbers. The moment you got home you started to message Hanzo. He replied almost immediately. The more the two of you messaged, and sent memes (although he wasn't 100% how to send them or what they were at first), you guys hit it off! The cycle repeated for weeks on end until the messages started implying more hangouts.

You and Hanzo went to many little 'mini-dates' over the year after the aquarium. You visited bookstores, history and art museums, went to hidden lakes to swim, and even went on a week-trip to a cabin in the woods. That trip is where everything started to change between you two, more than it ever has.

During the first half of the week, it was filled with swimming, smores, movie nights, coffee morning, Hanzo teaching you how to shoot a bow while you taught him how to see constellations in the stars. It was like a dream to you and Hanzo.

It was one certain night though, the two of you sat outside next to the fire, the radio playing quiet music as nature also sang her song. Hanzo sitting right next to you on the only wooden bench at the cabin as the fire started to burn out.

"I just would like to tell you," he began, closing his eyes with a deep breath, and leaning back into the seat. "You have been one if not, the only person who understands me to an extent. I don't want us to ever... ever fade apart." You smiled, agreeing with him, noticing how nervous he seemed. You questioned Hanzo about it and he didn't reply, only opening his eyes and looking off into what was left of the fire.

"I have to say this but I would like it if we are able- if you want to officially be my partner... romantically, I mean." He said, clearing his throat through his pauses as he turned to you. Your confused look turned into a smile. You mentioned to him how you felt the same way, the same connection of an introvert finding their duo; their other half in a sense. Hanzo smiled. He smiled more than you could possibly handle.

You moved your hand to his cheek, cupping it as he did the same to you. He laughed under his breath, blowing you a small kiss with a wink. This caused you to move your hand and start laughing; both of you started to laugh harder. It was so sudden and out of character for him, you weren't expecting it! (He wasn't expecting himself to do that either.

"I am- so sorry dear," he said between laughter, calming his composure quickly. You told him it was 'okay, love', that night being the start of your relationship... officially, I mean.

How Hanzo shows his affection:

I believe he shows his affection for you mainly through small gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.

Regarding small gifts I mean stuff most people wouldn't really notice or care for, but you do. Before the two of you started to stay over at each other's places he would bring you your favorite flower every time you two saw each other after agreeing to start dating. Whether that be just meeting up for coffee, a mini-date, or even just hanging out at each other's homes.

You also started to notice that he would leave little notes behind with you whenever he stayed over at your house. The notes would have little cute poetry written on them, each one writing out a thing he loved about you. It was actually pretty cute, you kept every note he left.

The next affectionate thing he would do is acts of service. If it was to help you with shopping or cleaning your home he would be over to help when we could. He loved spending time with you, and even more if he could help you with something that you have pushed back for a while.

He also never minded buying you stuff you saw from stores online. You couldn't make comments about a jacket looking good without him buying it with quick shipping! Because of this, you started to have to remind him just because you say you might want something, it doesn't mean you want it. But you understood where Hanzo came from, he just wanted to make you happy and If that meant buying you stuff then that is what he has to do!

Finally, physical touch. He may not seem like it, but he is the kind of person to cuddle up on the couch or give you kisses on your shoulders or forehead. Even if you may not be a fan of it, he would respect it and hold back.

But come on, no way you could keep declining that face! When you allowed him to cuddle or hug you, kiss you, or even hold your hand, he cherished every moment of it. He would tighten his hold on you as you lay next to him on the bed, pushing his face into your shoulder and kissing it quietly with a hidden smile on his face. If you held hands he would squeeze your hand so firmly, rubbing his thumb on yours while he leaned more onto your body.