#and that would have been a regret our boy couldn’t handle

[sweettkstrand]

I will miss you for sure, papa Reyes. I am so happy they allowed Carlos the chance to tell his father he loved him and for him to see how much his father loved him as well.

[winchesterwild78]

Cranky

Characters: Soldier Boy (Ben) x Reader 

Warnings: Ben being a dick (I mean he is Soldier Boy), Language, insecurities, Fluff, SMUT, unprotected sex (wrap it up people)

A/N: This idea came to me earlier today when I was fighting a bad headache and got a bit cranky. 😀 I wrote it in a matter of hours and didn’t edit it well. Please overlook any mistakes. Afterall, I had a headache and was cranky. 😃

All work is my own, don’t take it!!

Minors DNI 18+

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“Leave me the fuck alone, Ben! It’s over 100 degrees, the fucking air conditioner isn’t working right, and I have a damn headache. I don’t need your bullshit too! Go cook your own damn dinner.” You shouted as you slammed your shared bedroom door. “Woman, you have some nerve speaking to me like that, and don’t slam my fucking doors.” He growled as he pushed open the door. “YOUR doors?!?! Fuck you, Ben! I thought this was our place? At least that’s what you said when you begged me to move in here. I guess your true colors are showing aren’t they?” “I didn’t beg you to do shit. I’m Soldier Boy, I don’t need to beg for anything, food, drugs, pussy. I get what I want when I want it, doll.” 

Your eyes went wide when he said that. You can handle his puffed up ego, his occasional drug use, even though it’s not as bad as it used to be, hell you can even handle his occasional misogynist views, but you couldn’t handle him talking about being with other women. The thought of him with another woman now just broke your fucking heart. 

The two of you had been together for about a year and a half. You two decided to move in together about six months ago. Most of the time it was fine. There were however days like today when everything hit a boiling point. You loved Ben and you knew he loved you. Sometimes he forgot you were in his corner and he would lash out at you, and sometimes you would forget he couldn’t help the way he is and you would push his buttons. 

You sat down on your shared bed and a single tear rolled down your face. “I need you to leave me alone right now. My head is hurting and I think we both have said some things we will regret later.” You spoke softly. Ben started to protest but was still pissed. He grumbled something under his breath and stormed out of the room. 

You heard the front door slam and you crumbled. You laid in your bed and cried until your head hurt worse and you fell asleep from exhaustion. You weren’t sure what time it was when you woke up. It was dark in the room and the sound of the front door shutting woke you up. You sat up in bed when you heard Ben’s voice and what sounded like another voice. 

You looked over and saw it was after 2 in the morning. You made your way out of the bedroom and down the dark hallway. You froze halfway down the hall when you heard two female voices and Ben’s. “Oh Soldier Boy, I want to show you how much I appreciate your service to our country.” One of them said. “I want to see if I can handle a big supe like you.” The other one said. You rounded the corner and found two, very young, very hot women hanging on Ben, who was dressed in his Soldier Boy uniform. 

You made eye contact with Ben as tears pricked your eyes. How could he betray you by doing this? You’ve given him everything, given up everything to be with him. The women saw you and were startled. “Who’s she?” One of them asked. Ben looked at you with a strange look in his eye and said “She’s nobody important.” Your mouth fell open and your heart shattered. The two women giggled and you turned to walk back to the bedroom. Ben knew what he was doing was wrong. He loved you but he was pissed, hurt even. 

Once in your room you grabbed a bag and started putting things in it. You hoped Ben would come to the room and beg you not to go, but he stayed in the living room with them. You heard giggles and squeals. Each one was like a knife to your heart. Ben was tough, but he was playful, loving and kind too. You finished packing some stuff and walked out of the room. You stopped long enough to see the women kissing Ben and rubbing on his body. You felt sick. 

Ben saw you with your bags. As you got to the door you turned around and said “Goodbye Ben, I love you.” Closing the door you sobbed all the way to your car. 

You drove to one of the closet hotels and checked in. Once in your room you took a shower and crawled into the bed. You curled into a ball and sobbed. You love Ben, you thought he loved you too. Talks between you two involved talking about the future. Marriage, children, retirement, normal life. When the two of you got together the sex was hard and rough, hot. Now it was softer and more loving. You were afraid this was what drove him into their arms. Was your life with Ben too boring, normal now? 

As you drifted off to sleep your phone rang. You looked at the screen and it was Ben. You ignored it. He hung up and called back several times. Finally after ten missed calls, and over a dozen texts you finally answered the phone. “What do you want, Soldier Boy?” You hissed. Ben’s mouth dropped. “Baby, please come home. I’m sorry. I made them leave. Nothing happened. I promise.” Ben said. “I don’t care what you do anymore Soldier Boy, fuck all the bimbos you want. Maybe you’ll find one who will suck your cock and cook your dinner all at the same time.” You seethed. “Please stop calling me Soldier Boy. It’s not my name, it’s not who I am.” Ben pleaded. “Not who you are anymore? Then why were you in the bar picking up women in it? Oh that’s right. Women drop their panties for Soldier Boy. How many of them drop their panties for Ben?” You hissed. Venom dripping with each word. “I’m exhausted Ben, I’m going to sleep. I’ll be by tomorrow for the rest of my things. If you’re still there I’ll be quick so I don’t disturb your plans with whoever is there with you. Good night, Ben. I hope you know how much I loved you.” You said quietly. “Baby please don’t leave me. I’m sorry. I love you too.” You could hear his voice crack. You knew he was crying. 

You hung up and turned your phone’s ringer off. You cried harder. Your heart was broken. You loved him so much and wanted to marry him. You finally fell asleep. You would make a plan tomorrow morning, right now you just wanted to sleep. A few hours later the phone in your hotel room rang. “Hello” you answered groggily. “Hello, Miss. Y/L/N, this is Sarah at the front desk. There is a man here saying he’s your husband. He’s very intoxicated and demanding to see you. If you need me to, I can call the police.” She offered. “No, that won’t be necessary. I’ll be down in a minute.” You sighed and hung up. Grabbing your shoes and robe you made your way down to the lobby. 

There Ben was. Drunk and just an absolute mess. His hair was all over the place, he was dressed in his t-shirt and gray sweatpants. He looked like your Ben. Your soft, kind, loving Ben. “Where is my wife? I know she’s here. Bring her to me. I need to tell her I fucked up and I love her more than anything. Please, bring her to me. Please.” He collapsed on the ground crying. 

You walked over to him and touched his shoulder. “Ben, honey. Come on, get up. Let’s get you upstairs.” You softly said. 

Ben looked up at you. His beautiful green eyes were bloodshot and red. From booze and crying. As he stood his big arms went around you pulling you into a tight hug. He started sobbing. “Baby I’m so sorry. Please don’t leave me. I love you. I’m a fuck up. I know I don’t deserve you or a second chance, but please don’t leave me. I swear nothing happened with them. I made them leave as soon as you left.” “Ben, honey come on. Let’s go to the room. We both need sleep.” You took his arm and led him to the elevator. On the elevator he held you tight. You tried not to melt into his touch, but you couldn’t help it. 

Once in the room you helped remove his shoes and his clothes down to his boxers. You knew he got hot at night so you wanted to make sure he was comfortable. Thank goodness the air conditioner in the room was working, because Ben was a furnace. Sleeping next to him was always hot. You crawled in bed next to him but kept your distance. You wanted to hold him or be held by him but your heart was still broken. Both of you laid in the dark in silence. Then Ben broke the silence. 

“Y/N, I love you. I know I hurt you and I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I just need you to know I have never nor would I ever cheat on you. You’re everything to me and I want to marry you and have children with you. I’ve never wanted anyone like I want you. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. If tomorrow you still want to leave, I’ll help you pack.” He leaned over and kissed your forehead softly. You leaned into his kiss. 

“Ben, I love you too. You broke my heart. Seeing you with those women and you telling them I was nobody important shattered my heart. I saw a future with you. Marriage, children and a happy life. I know you didn’t sleep with them. My Ben could never do that. You might be a hothead, but you’re not a cheater. I know that. I don’t know what to do. How can I be sure when we get into an argument you won't repeat tonight?” You asked him

Ben sat up and turned on the bedside lamp. He turned and looked at you. “Baby, I will spend the rest of our lives proving to you how much I love you and how much you deserve.” You sat up and cupped his face. “I love you Benji.” You placed a soft kiss on his lips. He pulled you in tighter and kissed you deeper. His hands went to the back of your head and pulled you down to the bed. 

You moaned and could feel your arousal starting to grow. Ben stopped and looked at you “so beautiful. My beautiful girl.” You blushed and he kissed you again. His lips set your soul on fire and his touch drove you wild. He pulled at the hem of your shirt and you leaned up helping him remove your shirt. Your bra was already off so your bare breasts were exposed to the cool air in the room. Your nipples grew hard with every touch of Ben’s fingers. His lips trailed down your neck and to your collarbone. One of his calloused hands grabbed your breast and his lips sucked on the other. You tilted your head back and moaned his name. “Mmm, Ben. Please take me now.” You moaned. 

Ben hooked his fingers in the waistband of your pants and pulled them down along with your panties. You lifted your hips to help him take them off. You could see his arousal in his boxers and you bit your lower lip. Ben was large and thick. He was bigger than any other man you’d been with. When you first started sleeping together his length and girth hurt, but now it curled your toes. Ben stood beside the bed and removed his boxers, letting his hard length spring free. 

“You ready sweetheart?” Ben asked seductively. You shook your head yes. Not trusting your own voice. “Words, baby girl. Use your words.” Ben said. “Yes, Ben. Please. I need you.” You moaned. Ben climbed on the bed and parted your legs with his. He kissed up your thighs stopping at your dripping wet folds. He used his calloused fingers to separate them, feeling the wetness and heat. He swiped his fingers over your swollen clit and you moaned, bucking your hips. “Don’t tease me, Ben.” you moaned. “So needy, aren’t you sweetheart.” He grinned. 

Ben pumped himself a few times before lining his swollen cock to your dripping wet entrance. He slowly pushed in, you both gasped. You bucked your hips and wrapped your legs around his waist trying to push him in. He took the hint and bottomed out deep inside. “Oh Ben!” You gasped and dug your nails in his biceps. He smirked and pulled almost out before thrusting in again. Each thrust, each moan pushed you closer to the release you were chasing. Ben leaned back, took his thumb and started to rub circles on your clit. You moaned loudly and pushed yourself into his thumb. “Play with yourself baby. I want to feel you cum on my cock. Squeeze my cock with your tight little pussy.” Ben whispered in your ear. 

You reached your hand between the two of you and started rubbing your swollen clit. Ben grabbed the back of your thighs and lifted your legs onto his shoulders. He started to pick up the pace as he was helping you chase your release, he was chasing his too. “Ben..I’m..close..I’m gonna..” “Cum for me sweetheart. Cum all over my cock.” Ben urged. “Oh fuck! BEN!!” You screamed his name as you came hard and your walls clenched around his cock. Ben stopped his thrusts and buried his face in the crook of your neck. You cumming like you did almost made him cum too. 

He leaned back up, kissing your lips as he got back in position. He began thrusting in you again. You could tell he was close. His movements became more determined and deeper. Your nails dug into his large biceps and your fingers danced lightly over his toned chest. This man was a god among men and he was all yours. A single tear slipped out of your eye. You weren’t sad, in that moment as you were looking up into his green eyes you knew he meant what he said. He loved you and he wanted only you. Looking deep in his eyes you whispered “I love you, my Benji. Always and forever.” 

Ben leaned down and captured your lips with his. The kiss was soft and full of love. “I love you too, my y/n/n, Always and forever.” His thrust began to get sloppy and you knew he was close. “Cum Ben, please cum in me. Fill me up with your seed. Put a baby in me.” You said breathlessly. That turned Ben on more than you realized. He growled and started to thrust harder. Then with one final thrust he came hard with a loud grunt. You could feel him coat your womb with his seed. As he finished he pulled out. A little of his cum seeped out of your used pussy. 

Ben went to the bathroom to grab a washcloth to clean you both up. Once you were both clean he tossed it to the side and pulled you close. He kissed your head and both of you let out a contented sigh. “I love you so much, Y/N.” “I love you too, Ben. Let’s enjoy this cool air and get some much needed sleep.” You said as you yawned. “I agree, but answer me one question before we go to sleep.” He sat up. “Sure, Ben, what is it?” You asked, closing your eyes. “Will you marry me?” Ben asked. Your eyes opened wide and you sat up. “What?!?” “I want you to marry me. Will you marry me?” Ben questioned again. You sat shocked. “Ben, I would love nothing more than to marry you.” You replied and smiled. He pulled you into a kiss and both of you laid down. 

You placed your head on his chest, hearing the steady beat of his heart. His arms were wrapped around you and he was letting his fingers draw delicate patterns on your skin. You felt safe in his arms. Regardless of everything that happened today, you knew he loved you and you loved him. You understood that sometimes we all can get just a bit cranky. 

Tags: @nescaveckdaily  @kr804573 @k-slla @jackles010378 @jawritter

@xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @roseblue373 @cheynovak @jassackles  @chriszgirl92

@suckitands33 @arcannaa @n-o-p-e-never @ladysparkles78 @smoothdogsgirl

@hobby27 @manicjk @stoneyggirl2 @stoneyggirl2

[illdowhatiwantthanks]

The Avocado & The Turnip (The Surprise, Part 8)

Emily Prentiss x fem!reader Warnings: established relationship, pregnancy times, fluffy fluff, kind of hurt/comfort (?), mentions of some pretty horrific crimes (duh), gunshot wound, some explicit language Word Count: 1.8k

Summary: A series of hard cases puts a strain on your relationship with Emily. Anxieties run high on both sides, and the reality of Emily's job–and the risks the come with it–feel even more real than usual now that there's going to be a child in the picture.

Week 16: The Avocado

“I just don’t know what to say to him,” Emily exclaimed, resting her chin on your stomach, a worried look on her face.

Your plans for an adorable evening of talking to the baby had backfired. For unknown reasons, Emily had come home in a bad mood, anxious and on edge. Somehow, the news that the baby could likely hear you now had only made her more anxious.

“You can say anything, Em. She’s the size of an avocado. She’s not gonna remember what we say; she’s gonna remember our voices.”

You ran your fingers through Emily’s hair, trying your best to alleviate some of her stress. You’d meant for this to be good news, to be a fun, cute little moment she could have with you and the baby after a brutal day at work.

“Tell her about your day,” you suggested.

Emily glared at you, and you felt yourself shrink. “I can’t tell him about my day!” she yelled, her voice angry. “What am I supposed to say? Hey, little man! I have to leave you tomorrow to go find a guy who’s murdering teenage boys by ripping their throats out with his teeth and then eating them. But don’t worry, I’ve only had to deal with, oh, ten or so cannibals over the years. The chances of you being cannibalized are slim. Never zero though!”

In your head, you knew that Emily’s outburst had nothing to do with you, nothing to do with the baby, and everything to do with the horrendous things she saw at work. She tried very hard not to bring work home with her, not to carry the weight of the horrors she saw every day into your house. But sometimes they stuck to her. Sometimes they dragged her down, and she couldn’t quite shake them. But it wasn’t often that she was mean. She hardly ever raised her voice at you. She knew it scared you.

You sat up and placed a hand protectively over your stomach, trying to keep your face set, impassive, but flinching a little as Emily moved toward you.

She was instantly full of regret. Her face fell as she noticed that your posture had changed from open to defensive, noticed the way your eyes had glazed over–a remnant of trauma.

“Oh, honey, I’m sorry,” she breathed, cupping your cheek. “I’m so sorry.”

You softened when you saw that she was close to crying–a rarity for Emily–and pulled her head to your chest, pressing kisses to the top of her head.

“I’m sorry, baby,” she mumbled against you. “It was just a hard day.”

“Tell me about it.”

“What?” she asked, lifting her head a bit.

“Tell me,” you insisted. “I can handle it. You’re my wife. You had a bad day. I want to hear about it.”

Emily shook her head, her voice so quiet you almost couldn’t hear. “No, you don’t.”

“Hey,” you said, tilting her chin so she was looking in your eyes. “I can decide what’s too much for me, okay?” You rubbed your thumb back and forth along her cheek. “If I say I can handle it, I need you to believe me.”

Emily sighed, exhaling shakily. “You remember after we started dating?” she explained, her voice low. “And I had a really hard time at work because every victim who was a woman made me think of you?”

“I remember,” you answered. And you did. If there had ever been a time in your relationship when you would’ve broken up with Emily, that would have been it. She’d been angry, on edge, paranoid, and even more obsessive about work than usual. It had eventually gotten so bad that you’d given her an ultimatum–start going to therapy or this isn’t going to work. Nearly six years later, Emily still had a biweekly standing appointment with her therapist–unless, of course, she was in the field.

She played with your fingers, quiet for a moment. “It feels like that all over again, but with kids. Child victims are hard anyway, but… every tiny body I see, I just think of him and–” Her voice broke, and you held her a little tighter. “It scares the shit out of me.”

“Of course it does,” you assured her. “That just means you love her, baby. It means you’re gonna be a great mom. It makes sense that those cases hit closer to home right now.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want to take it out on you. Or him.”

You exhaled slowly, kissing the top of her head again. “When was your last appointment with Angie?”

Emily sat up, stretching, and shrugged, looking guilty. “Last month, maybe? I just–I’ve been out on cases and…”

“I know, baby,” you said, taking her hands in yours before she could start biting her nails. “It’s okay. But, maybe you should call her and see if she can get you in. Even tonight, you know? Before you leave tomorrow. She does telehealth, doesn’t she?”

Emily nodded. “Yeah. Okay.”

She still looked guilty and nervous. It broke your heart.

“Come here,” you said, tugging her onto your lap. She wrapped her arms and legs around you and hugged you like you were the only thing keeping her tethered to this world. And for your part–you held on like you’d never, ever let her go–and you never, ever would.

Week 17: The Turnip

“She what!?” you yelled into the phone, launching yourself off the couch and scrounging around in the junk drawer for your keys.

“Calm down, mama,” Derek soothed through the phone. “It’s just a surface wound. The bullet grazed her shoulder, that’s all.”

“That’s all!? My wife gets shot, and you’re telling me that’s all!?”

You heard a scuffle on the other end of the phone, a distant, sharp Give me the phone! and then there was Emily’s voice, flooding you with relief.

“Honey, I’m fine, I promise,” she said, and she certainly didn’t sound like she was dying.

“You got shot!”

“Just a little bit…” Her voice was sheepish.

You threw up your hands in frustration. “Emily Elizabeth Prentiss! You have a child coming. You can’t be getting shot!”

“I know, I know.”

You sighed, rubbing your forehead. “What hospital are you at?”

“No, baby, you don’t need to come,” she protested.

“Don’t need to come, my ass,” you grumbled. “Where are you?”

Another scuffle and Derek had the phone back. “Y/N. Hey. We’re just in Baltimore, alright? She’ll probably be discharged here in a few minutes, and I’ll bring her home.”

You were still a little suspicious. “Straight home?”

“You have my word.”

It was the longest hour and a half of your life, sitting on the couch, watching the Find My dot of Emily inch its way home. You frowned when you saw her stop at El Rinconcito. That little shit. She was trying to buy you off with pupusas. Well, it wasn’t going to work. Your stomach rumbled. Well, it might work a little bit.

A half hour later, you heard the door unlock. Derek held it open for a very guilty looking Emily, who walked through the threshold with her arm bandaged and wrapped in a sling.

“Oh my god,” you breathed, your hands fluttering all over her, gingerly touching the bandage and turning her face this way and that to check for more damage.

“I’m fine, honey,” she said, pressing her good hand to your face and kissing you.

“Mmhm,” you mumbled, unconvinced. “Tell that to your unborn child.”

Emily crouched down and pressed a kiss to your stomach. “Mommy’s just fine, little guy, don’t you worry.”

It was so cute, you couldn’t even be that mad.

“Alright, lovebirds,” Derek said, gesturing to the couch. “Get comfortable and let Uncle Derek take care of you.”

You grimaced, thinking of straight people things. “Eew.”

He rolled his eyes at you. “Not like that. Sit down and eat your pupusas, woman.”

You and Emily giggled, plopping yourselves on the couch, one on either side.

Derek threw blankets at you, and you got yourselves situated, your legs tangled in the middle. Derek plated the takeout and brought it to you.

“I could get used to this,” Emily said, taking a bite and running her foot up and down your leg.

“You better fucking not,” you mumbled through a bite of pupusa. “I don’t want you getting shot every time you want a lazy day.”

Derek brought you both glasses of water and set a bottle of pain meds on the side table next to Emily.

“Anything else I can do for you, ladies?” he asked. “Foot rub? Serenade? Grocery run?”

You smiled at him. He was so good to you. Both of you. “You’re gonna make some straight woman very happy.”

He bent down to ruffle your hair and to squeeze Emily’s good hand. “I’ll settle for my favorite lesbians for now. You need anything else before I go?”

Emily shook her head. “No, I think we’ll be okay. Thanks, Morgan.”

“Anytime, Prentiss,” he replied, giving her a small salute as he walked out the door. "Call me if you need anything."

The moment he left, you shot a glare at Emily. 

“What?” she said, trying and failing to shrug, thanks to her injured shoulder.

You couldn’t help the worried expression that took over your face.

“Please tell me you’re careful,” you pleaded, brushing a few unexpected tears from under your eyes.

“Y/N.” She sat up, alarmed, and reached for your hand. “I’m careful. I swear.”

“I just… I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“And you’ll never have to find out,” she reassured, rubbing her thumb across the back of your hand.

“We need you, Em,” you whispered, placing your other hand over your baby bump.

She winced a little as she moved forward, pulling your face toward her so she could stroke your cheek. “I’m never reckless, honey. I do everything I can to stay safe. I promise. I will always come home to you.”

You were quiet as she pressed her forehead to yours, breathing in the smell of her, the warmth. You both knew it was a promise she couldn't make, not with her job. But you needed Emily to understand that it wasn't just her she was staying safe for anymore. It was you and the little one, who deserved to grow up with both of her moms.

“Sometimes it scares me how much I love you,” you said, so quiet she almost didn’t hear.

Emily kissed your forehead, then pressed her lips to yours, soft and gentle. “Me too.”

She pecked you on the lips again, then brushed her thumb over your bottom lip. “But you don’t need to be scared today, okay?”

She smiled a little, and you nodded, taking a deep breath.

“Now, eat your pupusas,” she grinned, pinching your cheek.

[coryosmin]

exes and oh’s - sejanus plinth x fem!reader

summary: being heartbroken after breaking up with coriolanus, you’ve not left your house in a few days. but your best friend sej knows exactly how to make you move on from his best friend.

word count: 3,200

warnings: nsfw, mdni, coryo’s ex x sejanus, smut, p in v, shy reader, soft sejanus, praise kink, soft sex, fingering, oral (f receiving), sejanus plinth lives AU because he never died in my heart, crying during sex, sejanus is so cute, coryo makes an appearance at the end, NOT PROOF READ BECAUSE ITS 3 AM AND IM TOO TIRED SO I APOLOGIZE FOR TYPOS AND GRAMMAR ERRORS

being coriolanus’s girlfriend had been both great and bad. he always treated you relatively well, bringing you out on dates, getting you gifts, he was always so good in bed. however, he was also very jealous and possessive, constantly thinking you were cheating on him with everyone in the capitol. it got so bad that when you were out having lunch with your father, you came home to coriolanus in your apartment asking where the hell you had been and saying you were lying when you said you were with your father. so ultimately, you broke up with coryo, unable to handle the whole possessiveness thing any longer.

you were heartbroken to say the least. your breakup had been quite the blowout. when you mentioned coriolanus’s possessiveness and how toxic it was, he yelled at you, accusing you of cheating on him and that you were just looking for an excuse to leave him. so here you were, sitting on your couch crying to sejanus, yours and coriolanus’ best friend, about the breakup. sejanus held you close to him, letting you cry on his shoulder as he had his arms wrapped around you.

“i just don’t understand why he would say such hurtful things, you know?” you sniffled, leaning away from sej’s touch to look at him. your eyes were so red and puffy from crying, sejanus felt his heart break at your heartbroken look.

the curly haired boy sighed, shrugging his shoulders. “that’s just how coryo is, unfortunately,” he said, taking your hands in his. “he’ll attack first and regret later.”

“i just thought he really valued me, you know? he always treated me so well despite the possessiveness,” you exclaimed, taking a shaky deep breath.

sejanus looked at you with his soft brown eyes. he breathed in before replying. “i think, instead of dwelling on it, you should take this opportunity to forget about him,” he exclaimed.

you let out a dry, breathless laugh. “and how do you suppose i do that, sejanus? sleep with someone else? i’m not going to just sleep with anyone.”

“you could sleep with me,” sejanus said, looking at you seriously.

“what?” you asked, furrowing your eyebrows in confusion.

sejanus took a deep breath before clearing his throat. “you don’t want to sleep with just anyone,” he said, his voice neutral. “why not sleep with someone that cares about you?”

you shook your head in response, laughing in disbelief. “i’m not going to sleep with my ex’s best friend, sejanus.” you said.

“i’m your best friend too,” sejanus replied. “besides, you need to forget about him. and i’d be more than willing to help you.”

you thought about it for a moment, unsure of how to reply. sejanus was indeed your best friend. however, he was coryo’s before he became yours. wouldn’t he be betraying his best friend? “coryo would be so angry if he found out,” you replied, frowning.

“what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him,” sejanus replied softly, bringing your hand to his mouth, pressing a kiss to the back of it.

you couldn’t help the blush on your cheeks, looking at sejanus. his brown eyes looked into your eyes. his eyes were so soft and loving. you bit your lip. you couldn’t deny that part of you wanted to do it. sejanus was of course an attractive guy and very down to earth. he may be from the districts but that didn’t matter too much to you. you took a deep breath before replying. “okay, sej,” you whispered. “but only if you promise it won’t ruin our friendship afterward.”

sejanus let out a chuckle, nodding his head. “i promise,” he said, smiling at you. he leaned in, moving his face closer to yours. “are you sure, though?”

you licked your lips, nodding your head. “yes,” you murmured, your hot breath hitting sejanus’s face. and without anymore hesitation, sejanus kissed you gently on the lips. his kisses were so much more different compared to coriolanus’s. coryo had always kissed you hungrily, as if you’d disappear if he didn’t hold you close to him. sejanus’s kisses? well, he kissed you like you were delicate. like you were something to cherish. his lips were soft against yours, almost meaningful. and you couldn’t help the fluttering in your heart. though maybe that’s just due to being in an emotionally vulnerable state.

sejanus continued kissing you as he began to unbutton your blouse. and of course you let him. you did the same to him, unbuttoning sejanus’s dress shirt. ever since he had come back from district 12, he had focused on maintaining a specific image within the capitol, is clothes included. and therefore, he wore mostly button up and slacks most of the time as casual wear. you don’t know what had happened when he and coryo were away but you do know that sejanus came back more reserved than ever before.

sejanus finished unbuttoning your shirt, pulling it off of you and tossing the shirt to the side. sejanus pulled away from the kiss, looking at you with a small smile before looking down at your skin. you wore a simple black lace bra that cupped your breasts nicely. sejanus looked back into your eyes. “you’re so beautiful,” he murmured, pressing another kiss to your lips. “always so beautiful.”

you couldn’t help the blush on your cheeks as your heart fluttered. of course coriolanus had always called you pretty. but his words were never as sensual as sejanus’s are right now. “thank you,” you whispered bashfully. you bit your lip nervously.

sejanus smiled. “do you still want to continue?” he asked softly.

you nodded your head. “yes, please.”

“shall we move to your bedroom?” he asked gently.

you nodded your head once more. “yes,” you said. sejanus stood up, the tent in his pants quite obvious. his shirt was mostly unbuttoned, not all the way as you had stopped when he pulled away from the kiss. but you could see the toned muscles of his abs. he looked absolutely handsome. his curls had grown back a while ago, adding to his handsome look. you were about to stand up as well when suddenly sejanus stopped you. you looked up at him confused until he slid a hand underneath your legs and the other on your back, lifting you into his arms. “what are you doing?” you asked as he picked you up.

“if we're doing this, darling, we’re doing this the right way,” was all he said as he began carrying you. he had a grin on his face as he looked at you. you simply wrapped your arms around his neck, unable to help the smile on your face as you let yourself be carried to your bedroom.

sejanus placed you down gently onto your bed, your head on the pillows before standing back up. he unbuttoned his shirt the rest of the way before letting it fall to the floor. he wanted to make tonight special for you because you deserved to be treated respectfully and with adoration. sejanus knew that coryo was a harsh lover. you deserved to be cherished and taken care of. he moved onto the bed, positioning himself on top of you by holding himself up with his arms as he captured your lips with his again.

the kiss was sensual, slow, and gentle, just like sejanus was with you. you weren’t used to this gentleness, truthfully. with coryo, he would of course kiss you and take his time with you but his touches were rough, needy, desperate. coryo was a fantastic but selfish lover. but so far, with sej, it was opposite.

sejanus pulled away from the kiss, moving to kiss your neck. you moved your hands to caress sejanus’s back, feeling his muscles as he pressed gentle kisses to your neck. he pressed a kiss to your pulse point before licking it, causing you to gasp from the sensation. sejanus brought a hand down your body to the waistband of your slacks. he sucked on your pulse point, his fingers going underneath your pants and panties, using a finger to spread around your arousal.

you let out a soft moan, your eyes fluttering shut as you spread your legs for sej. sejanus began to gently rub your clit with two fingers, causing you to buck your hips. he pulled away from your neck, his lips moving gently down your body. he kissed your collarbone as he rubbed your clit. sejanus then stopped rubbing your clit, dipping one finger into your hole and thrusting it in and out gently. you moaned, looking at sejanus.

“you’re so wet for me, sweetheart,” sejanus murmured against your skin, looking at you with his pretty brown eyes. “does it feel good?” he asked you, curling his finger inside of you, causing you to moan a bit louder.

you nodded your head. “feels so good, sej,” you said, looking at your best friend.

sejanus smiled at your reaction. “i’m glad, beautiful,” he said, adding another finger. you mewled in response, your eyes fluttering shut. sejanus thrusted his fingers a bit faster, the digits curled to hit your g-spot repeatedly. you felt yourself getting closer, arching your back. “close already, beautiful?” he asked, placing a kiss on top of your right breast. “you’re doing so good for me. cum for me.”

and you came with a loud moan, clenching your walls around sejanus’s fingers and trying to clamp your thighs closed. he fingered you through your orgasm. and when you came down from your high and relaxed your body, he removed his fingers from inside of you and out of your pants, smiling at you. “you did so good, baby,” he said. his praise made you shutter. you always had a thing for praise and sejanus gave it so willingly. it warmed your heart a lot.

sejanus pulled back, kneeling at the end of the mattress as he unzipped your slacks, pulling them down along with your panties. he threw them to the side. he then leaned down, pressing kisses to your thighs. you watched him, biting your lip. “want you, sej,” you murmured.

sejanus smiled at you, looking up at you. “and you’ll have me,” he murmured back. “but let me take care of you first, yeah?”

and who were you to say no? so you nodded your head in response.

“take your bra off for me, beautiful,” he said, going back to pressing kisses onto both of your thighs. you reached behind yourself, unclasping your bra. you threw the bra off the bed, not really caring for where it landed. sejanus looked up to see your breasts, unable to help the moan that escaped his lips. “god you’re so gorgeous, sweetheart.”

you couldn’t help the blush forming on your face as sejanus looked at you. you were completely naked in front of him and he looked at you as though you were a piece of art that needed to be worshipped. and you absolutely adored it. sejanus spread your legs, moving his head between your thighs. you took a breath in anticipation before sejanus licked your slit, causing you to let out a shaky breath.

sejanus tongued your clit, looking up at you with his beautiful brown eyes. you let out a whine, your eyes fluttering shut. sejanus couldn’t help the small smirk on his lips as he looked at you. you were just so amazing and perfect. he absolutely adored you. sejanus began sucking on your clit and you reached a hand to grip his hair, arching your back. your other hand gripped your boob, massaging the flesh as sejanus continued eating you out. you couldn’t help tugging on sejanus’s hair, causing him to moan against your pussy.

you ground your hips against his face, adding more to your pleasure and sejanus loved it. “so close, sej,” you whined, bringing your other hand to his head. sejanus continued his ministrations with his tongue, sucking on your clit to help bring your release. and soon your thighs were clenching around sejanus’s head, a loud moan escaping your lips as you came for the second time that night.

when you came down from your high, sejanus lifted his head, getting up from the bed. his face was covered in your juices and his eyes were most certainly blown out. “gonna fuck you now, okay?” he breathed out, palming himself through his pants. he couldn’t help it at all. you were just so pretty and the noises you made were just so so sweet. and you tasted absolutely divine.

you nodded your head at sejanus. “please,” you said, breathing heavily from your orgasm. “need your cock so bad, sej, need it.” you practically whined.

sejanus cooed, unzipping his pants and pulling them down along with his boxers. “don’t worry, beautiful, gonna fuck you so good,” he said, revealing his cock to you. it was average but so girthy. you mewled at the sight of his cock, your pussy clenching around nothing. sejanus couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped his lips, moving back onto the bed and crawling on top of you.

he pressed a kiss to your lips, bringing his cock to your pussy. he spread your wetness around with the tip, letting out a shaky moan as he did so. you shuttered in overstimulation as he ran the tip on your clit. he then brought his cock to your hole, slowly pushing inside of you. you let out a moan at the stretch, it stinging due to the girth. sejanus pressed a kiss to your lips to distracted you from the pain. you kissed him back, your hands gripping sejanus’s back as he continued to ease his cock inside of you.

when he was fully in you, sej stayed still, not moving so that you could adjust to his size. you guys continued kissing as you waited. and after a few moments, you pulled away from the kiss, looking into sej’s eyes. “you can move,” you whispered.

sejanus let out a shaky breath, nodding his head. he moved his cock out of you before thrusting it back in gently. the both of you moaned, your mouths agape in pleasure. “fuck, you’re so tight and wet, beautiful,” sejanus said, still looking into your eyes as he moved his hips slowly.

“so thick inside me, sej,” you breathed out.

sejanus leaned down to kiss you again, maintain a slow pace as one of his hands moved to grip yours, intertwining your fingers. “you’re so gorgeous,” he murmured against your lips. “you deserve to be treated good.” he said.

your heart swelled from sejanus’s words, an onset of emotions hitting you. he was treating you so good with holding your hand, being so gentle, giving you words of praise. you couldn’t it when tears welled in your eyes, feeling emotionally vulnerable in that moment. a few tears escaped your eyes, causing sejanus to frown and stop his movement. “what’s wrong?” he asked, looking at you with a concerned expression. “do you wish to stop?”

you sniffled, shaking your head no. “i’m sorry,” you apologized. “you’re treating me so good, got emotional,” you said softly, looking up at sej with teary eyes.

sejanus let out a breath of relief, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “it’s okay to get emotional, princess,” he said softly, his free hand that was holding him up moving so he could rest on his forearm. “do you want to continue or for me to stop?”

“please continue,” you said, bringing a hand to wipe your tears.

sejanus gave you a small smile. “you sure?”

“more than sure.”

and with that, sejanus continued his thrusts, causing you to moan and arch your back. he moved his hips a bit faster, not enough to be rough but just enough to make a really good rhythm. “you feel so good, princess,” sejanus murmured, bringing his head down towards your ear. “taking my cock so well,” he said.

you moaned in response, closing your eyes in pleasure. sejanus angled his hips a certain way, causing his cock to hit your g-spot repeatedly. you let out a loud whine and moan, gently scratching sejanus’s back. he let out a groan of pleasure, burying his face in your neck. his hips continued their gentle but fast pace, making the familiar heat tighten in your abdomen. sejanus’s cock stiffened inside of you, signaling he was close.

“you’re clenching around me so good, beautiful,” sejanus breathed out, his lips brushing against the skin on your neck. “gonna cum on my cock?”

you nodded your head in response. “yes, sej. i’m so close,” you moaned out.

“such a good girl,” he grunted, moving his a bit faster as he chased both of your orgasms. “go ahead, baby, cum on my cock.”

his words brought you over the edge as you let out a sob of pleasure, arching your back as you came hard around sejanus’s cock. the clenching of your walls made sejanus moan loudly as he released inside of you. “oh fuuuck,” sejanus moaned out, thrusting his hips to ride out both of your orgasms.

and when you both finished, sejanus pulled out, laying down next to you. you both breathed heavily, relishing in the post orgasmic bliss. sejanus turned his head to look at you as you looked at him. “i hope that helped,” he sighed.

you smiled, nodding your head. “it did, a lot,” you murmured. “thank you, sej.”

“anything for you, beautiful,” he replied.

suddenly, you heard a knock on the front door. you frowned as you hadn’t expected anyone to be coming over tonight, let alone at this time of night. “i’ll be right back,” you said, getting up from the bed. sejanus nodded his head at you as you walked over to grab your robe, putting it on and tying the belt around your waist to cover yourself up.

you walked out of your bedroom door, making your way to the front door. taking a deep breath, you opened the front door. and there, tall and blond, stood coriolanus snow with a bouquet of roses and red-brimmed eyes, looking down at you. you stood there shocked, your heart pounding in your chest at the realization of what you had just done.

and at that moment, sejanus walked out of your bedroom, dressed in his clothes but hair clearly disheveled. “who’s at the door?” sejanus asked, walking to stand behind you before looking at who was at the door. his eyes widened as he saw coriolanus standing there with now a confused and angry look on his face.

“what the fuck is this?” coriolanus asked angrily, his voice cracking as he spoke. and in that moment, he didn’t care because it most definitely does hurt to find out that his best friend fucked his ex girlfriend.

[mysterious-moonstruck-musings]

Closed Position: Week 4 (Jive Part 2)

Closed Position Masterlist ||| Main Masterlist Dieter Bravo x OFC (Katarina)

Series Summary: Dieter Bravo, now sober, was looking to change his bad boy image after hitting rock bottom. His team hoped that having him join the nationally televised family friendly dance competition, Dancing with the Stars, would be a good first step, if they can keep him out of trouble. 

Katarina Stamos expected her last season as a professional dancer on the show to go the same as it had for the past thirteen seasons. That all changed when she was partnered with the infamous Dieter Bravo. 

Dieter and Katarina are reluctantly thrown into their partnership and must learn to work together to succeed in the competition. In the process they form a deeper connection beyond the dance floor that neither anticipated.

Chapter Word Count: 16.6k

👉 Warnings: Themes dealing with intimate partner violence (not from Dieter), past alcohol abuse, and past drug abuse. There will be fluff, tears, spicy language, and smut. This will be a slow burn. Read at your own risk. Dieter Bravo comes with his own warnings.

Chapter Quote: I’m so fucked.

Kat's POV On my drive home from the diner, my thoughts were only of Dieter. His mood had been all over the place this week. I really had been concerned about him slipping up and felt more relief than I probably should have when he mentioned his therapy appointment. At least he seemed to be handling things the right way. I couldn’t figure out what suddenly had made him so upset, but I felt like it had something to do with me. He had been more distant since the show on Monday, and I didn’t understand why. 

When Dieter came into the dance studio on Wednesday, I could tell that Alec’s presence was affecting him. Having both men in the same space with no one else around made me nervous. It was obvious that Dieter didn’t care for Alec and vice versa. The tension between the two of them was so thick, I was concerned about another confrontation. Luckily, Alec didn’t stick around long. 

However, the tension was still there even after Alec left. I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to ask Dieter what was going on. I figured it had something to do with me giving Alec another chance. I knew how Dieter felt about the way Alec treated me, but for a brief moment, I couldn’t help wondering if there was more to it - if maybe he was feeling something for me too. Something more than concern for a friend’s safety. 

It pissed me off when he said he was disappointed in my choice, even though he had every right to be. It was hard to hear because I knew he wasn’t wrong. It was a bad decision, and I could already feel the regret setting in. The burst of anger did fuel me to ask what I really wanted to know, if there was another reason he was so upset about it. I knew him well enough to know that he wouldn’t answer it honestly, but he did falter. I briefly considered his response, something about it causing butterflies to form in my stomach. My gut was telling me there was something else, but the logical part of my brain didn’t believe it.  

His pleas that followed to not let it get bad and the burning look in his eyes caused a shift in the tension. I couldn’t fight the urge to touch him, my hand involuntarily reaching for his cheek. He surprised me by leaning into it before taking my hand in both of his. The moment turned oddly intimate, and I wanted nothing more than to tell him how I was feeling, but I knew I couldn’t. It was wrong to be feeling those things for him. I knew that I needed to keep it professional, for all our sake. 

Dieter seemed to return to his normal self after that, which had me questioning things all over again. Surely that wasn’t all that had been bothering him? I worked to brush that thought aside. I was just happy to have him back. Given that the day had ended so well, I wasn’t ready to be away from him. I had missed his light and wanted it to shine on me just a little bit longer. So, I asked him to try the Greek diner with me, which turned out to be a terrible idea. 

The last two hours had sent my thoughts and feelings into a tailspin. Dieter seemed to be opening up to me more and more each time we were together. Tonight felt…different. Not unlike how it felt when I had dinner at his place. He was attentive and maybe even a little flirty. The way he kept looking at me was causing my thighs to clench together under the table. I wasn’t sure if it was just a physical attraction or more. He definitely had me reevaluating things during my whole drive home.

It was already getting late by the time I pulled into the garage. I hadn’t heard from Alec at all, even though he said he was planning to come over for the night so we could go out for breakfast before our rehearsals started the next morning. I was both annoyed that he hadn’t at least texted me and relieved that I might not have to deal with him. I was settling into bed, planning to go down a social media rabbit hole on the Dieterina hashtag when I heard the front door open. I sighed, set my phone on the docking station to charge, then laid down to go to sleep. 

I could hear Alec moving around to get ready for bed, eventually settling in at my back and pulling me against his body to kiss my cheek. He smelled of cigarettes and something else I couldn’t figure out. Something floral maybe? It wasn’t normal and it made my stomach turn. When I only acknowledged him and didn’t escalate things, he sighed heavily then turned away and quickly fell asleep. 

My mind began racing. Was that perfume or something he had eaten or drank? I couldn’t tell and it was sending me into a spiral. I hated having to worry about this. I shouldn’t have to. And did I really have a right to? I wasn’t behaving much better than him today, and the thoughts I had been having were a whole other thing. 

And so what if it was perfume? He had been rehearsing with Lana half the day. It could just as easily be from that. Surely that’s all it was, if anything. Right? I was trying my best to be rational about this and give him the benefit of the doubt, but it was hard. Would I ever stop thinking like this when it came to him? 

It took forever for me to finally fall asleep, but I had managed to calm my thoughts by then. Not that it was a restful sleep. I spent most of the night tossing and turning, plagued by weird dreams that I couldn’t remember after waking. They only left me with a sense of foreboding that I couldn’t seem to shake. 

The following morning, I was in the bathroom getting ready when Alec came in. He hugged me from behind, burying his face into my neck and sighing dramatically. 

“Baby, I’m gonna have to skip out on breakfast. Marc just texted me and asked if we could switch rehearsal times. Something about a sick kid…So, we’re gonna head in earlier than planned.” 

He raised his head, giving me his best sad puppy face in the mirror as he rested his chin on my shoulder. 

I let out a controlled breath, sticking the mascara wand back into the container. No sense in getting ready now. “That’s ok…it’s understandable. It was nice of you to do that for him.”

“Yeah, so I guess imma head out. Maybe we can grab dinner later?”

I nodded, turning to kiss him goodbye. Only, he didn’t kiss me on the lips, he kissed me on the forehead and walked off without a second glance or another word. Something about that didn’t sit right. It stunned me actually. 

After I heard the front door shut, I moved to peek out through the curtains. Alec already had his phone to his ear with a smile on his face as he got into the driver's seat. Something about this felt off. 

I took a deep breath, moving to get my phone from the nightstand. Alec wasn’t a huge fan of Marc, often calling him a stuck up prick because he wouldn’t go out partying with the rest of the guys at all hours of the night. Marc was married and had young kids, so of course he didn’t do that. It was hard for me to believe that Alec would do anything to help Marc out given his feelings about him. Alec wasn’t typically very accommodating to people he didn’t care for. I was also fairly certain Marc usually had evening rehearsals, so he could be home with the kids while his wife was working. 

I pulled up Marc’s contact information and hit the call button. I worked to steady my breathing as the phone rang. Part of me hoped he didn’t answer out of fear from what I would learn. He did answer though. 

“Hey Kat, what’s up?” 

“Hey Marc, sorry to bother you. I just wanted to double check, did you by chance change your studio time for today?” 

“Nope, it should still be our usual evening time slot. Why?”

His answer knocked the air out of my lungs. I knew Alec was lying. I somehow managed to compose myself and quickly think up an explanation. 

“Not a huge deal, they had us double booked, but I think I’ve figured out a solution. I just wanted to check first before calling Dieter with the change.”

“Oh damn, that’s annoying. Do I need to do anything?”

“Na, I’ve got it sorted. You guys should be good.”

“Awesome. Thanks for catching that or we might’ve been sharing.” 

“No problem. I may see you around later. Enjoy your morning.”

“You too. Thanks again! Bye.”

I wasn’t sure what to do with this information. It didn’t necessarily mean he was cheating, but why else would he need to lie like that? I puffed air out of my cheeks, deciding to throw on my gym clothes and go to his place to see if he was there. 

A short time later, I found myself pulling into a parking spot at Alec’s apartment complex. I noticed his car was in its usual assigned space, so I decided to go in. As I was unbuckling my seatbelt, I spotted Lana walking up the steps leading to his second floor landing. I froze, watching as she knocked on the door. A few seconds later, Alec was there, pulling her tightly against him and kissing her with a lot more enthusiasm than he had with me lately. 

It hurt to see it, but I needed to. With the previous incidents, Alec swore he was never physical with those women. I didn’t believe him, but I also had no proof either. This time, there was no denying it. They definitely had something going on and clearly had for some time. 

The oddest mix of emotions was swirling inside of me. There was relief of course, but there was also hurt and anger. I had given up so much for this asshole and this was how he continued to repay me. After letting anger win the battle as the dominant emotion, I sat trying to reason with myself on the best way to handle this. I wanted to confront him, but I was also worried about his reaction. Would he get violent? 

I hesitated, but eventually stepped out of the car and began walking toward his apartment. When I reached the 2nd floor landing, I realized his door was still slightly ajar. The dumbass didn’t even get it shut all the way. As I got closer, I could hear them, on the sofa I assumed, already fucking. I felt sick from the sounds. It was made worse by the words that were coming out of Alec’s mouth; She’s the only one he needs, the only one who means anything to him, the only one he wants…it went on and on. I couldn’t listen anymore, reaching to push the door open with force, causing it to slam into the wall. 

Alec was seated on the couch with Lana straddling his lap, now trying to cover herself with her hands at the sound of the door. I got an eye full as his unprotected dick slipped out of her when she turned to look in my direction. 

I was seething. He couldn’t even wrap it up. He wasn’t even worried about bringing something home to me. Looks like my concerns were valid. 

“Kat…w-what the fuck are you doing?” Alec sputtered, shocked by my sudden appearance. 

I took a steadying breath, determined not to cry in front of him. “I just wanted you to know that I heard it with my own ears and I’m seeing it with my own eyes. There’s no sweet talking your way out of it this time you fucking asshole.”

“Baby, come on. Let’s talk about this…” 

He moved to get up, but Lana pushed him back against the sofa, refusing to get off his lap. Then she turned back to me, a sly smile on her lips. 

“What are you smiling about? He’s your fucking problem now.” 

I turned to leave, overhearing Lana telling Alec not to go after me as I moved toward the stairs. I had to applaud her, at least she seemed to have some authority over him. For now, anyway. In time, he would probably break her down too. 

In an odd way, I felt like that confrontation had taken some of his power away from him. He couldn’t lie his way out of it. There was no way he could twist this in his favor and save face. He wasn’t going to control me anymore. He couldn’t. My chains were broken, and I wasn’t going back. 

After sitting in my car for several minutes, the adrenaline rush was beginning to wear off, and now the hurt was setting in. The things he had said to Lana told me how little he actually cared about me. Why did he fight so hard to keep me around if he didn’t want to be with me? Or had he just been telling her what she wanted to hear? He was good at that tactic. 

I was left feeling like I had wasted the last six years of my life, for nothing. I was suddenly full of grief over everything that I had given up for Alec, and regret for the way I had allowed him to treat me. It was a relief to be done with him, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. I loved him once after all. We had been happy in the beginning and at one time I believed we could find our way back to that. The tears were coming now. I needed to get away from his apartment. 

I backed out of the parking spot and headed home. Once locked inside, I let the tears fall as I crawled into bed and sobbed into a pillow. An hour had passed when I finally checked the time. Realizing that I needed to pull it together and get ready for rehearsals. We were filming today, and I refused to do it looking like an emotional mess. 

After dragging myself out of bed, I moved to the bathroom to examine the damage. My eyes were red and swollen. I applied a warm compress, hoping it would take some of the swelling out. It helped some, but not enough. After washing my face, I worked to put a little more makeup on than I would normally wear in hopes it would make it less noticeable. It seemed to help some. 

I had to rush to make it to the dance studio in time. The camera crew was already there setting up and coming at me with a mic pack as soon as I walked through the door. I did my best to act normal, but from the way Dieter was eyeing me, I could tell he knew something was off. I knew he wouldn’t ask with hot mics on us, so that gave me some reprieve. 

My mood improved as we began to rehearse. Dieter of course found ways to make me smile, like he always did. Things seemed almost normal by the time the camera crew left for the day, leaving us alone for the last two hours of rehearsal time. Dieter did ask if everything was ok since I seemed flustered and was a few minutes late. I lied and said Alec and I had gone out for breakfast, and I had gotten held up by a traffic accident on the way here. I didn’t think he bought it, but he didn’t question me on the topic any further. I hated lying to him, but I wasn’t ready to share what happened. I needed time to process and deal with it on my own first, otherwise I was going to break down into a crying heap if I tried to explain it now. 

Our last bit of studio time went on as normal, allowing me to forget about the whole Alec thing for a bit. Once our time was up, we gathered our things as Dieter shared the latest Zee antics with me. Mentioning that he was heading to the pet store as we walked to our cars to leave. He lingered for a moment after saying goodbye, like another question was on the tip of his tongue, but he never asked it. Instead, he smiled and gave me a quiet, “See ya tomorrow” as he got into his car. 

I was considering my next steps as I left the dance studio. I knew that I probably needed to get checked out since I had no idea what Alec had been up to. I was certain he used a condom every time we were together since I had first found out about his infidelity, but I realized that wasn’t fool proof, and he was a fucking idiot. I also realized that it didn't protect me from all STDs. There were other ways of catching things. 

I was silently cursing Alec as I pulled into the parking lot of one of the local walk-in clinics. It looked fairly empty, which was a positive. I sat there for a moment, trying to prepare myself for what I was about to do. I would have to explain my situation, which meant I would have to finally say it out loud. I just hoped I could keep it together. The fact that I was having to do this made me hate him more than I had ever hated anyone. 

Luckily, they got me in quickly. I gave a urine sample, had an exam, then had blood drawn, and was swabbed in all the places to be tested for every STD possible. I was stoic through the whole process. It was the only way to keep from falling apart on the poor medical staff. I was told it would take 5-10 days to get the results, which seemed like an eternity when dealing with stuff like this. It made me feel dirty and used. I shouldn’t have had to do it, yet here I was. I should have listened to my gut instinct a long time ago. It would have saved me a lot of stress and grief. 

With that out of the way, I finally made my way home. I decided to soak in the tub for a bit to try and relax. I was feeling a little achy, probably because I hadn’t really been taking care of myself this week since Alec had been around. I needed to do better so that it didn’t become an issue. We still had a lot of weeks left to get through.

As I sat in the tub, I started browsing Instagram. Eventually finding myself on Dieter’s page. I had given it a quick scroll when I first followed him but hadn’t looked since. I noticed he had added “Cat Daddy” to his bio which made me snicker. Then, I scrolled all the way back to the beginning. He didn’t have much posted. Based on one of his earlier posts he had removed a lot before he went to rehab. I assumed it was the less than flattering stuff from his party days. 

There had obviously been a shift in him. I could tell just from the few posts from before rehab that were still available. Most of his newer content focused on Zee, plants, and painting, which I loved to see. There were a couple of the same shots provided to us from the show that I had shared, but nothing else.

I caught myself going on a liking spree. I had to force myself to stop before I ended up liking all of his posts. As I scrolled back toward the top, one picture caught my eye. It was a shot from his “sanctuary”, the corner with the leather seats and guitars where we played together the previous week. He posted it the day after I had been there, with the hashtag #MyFavoritePlace. I couldn’t help but wonder if his post was related to my visit. I shook that question from my head. What a ridiculous thought, Kat. 

I was then drawn to a picture of his hands covered in dirt as they potted a plant. He really did have nice hands. They were large with long, thick fingers. The small bullseye tattoo only added to their appeal. My mind momentarily wandered to thoughts of those hands on my body but dismissed them. I can’t go there. If I do, there’s no coming back. I moved on to the next post. I was chuckling at Dieter’s Croc covered feet when notifications started to pop up. 

“bangingbravo1 liked your photo.”

They came in one after another. My liking spree must have prompted him to do the same. The only difference, he did like all of my posts, except for the ones that had Alec in them. OK, Bravo. You made your point. Publicly. He was so unapologetically himself and was not afraid to make his opinions known. I honestly loved that about him, but damn if that wasn’t going to cause some gossip if anyone noticed. 

I hit the little notification bell at the top and turned all notifications on for him without a second thought. I smiled to myself, hitting the ‘message’ button. 

ME: I feel like I’m being Instagram stalked right now…

He didn't keep me waiting long for a reply.

DIETER: I’m pretty sure you were stalking me first, sweetheart. 😉

My smile widened, he was trying to push my buttons. Truth be told, I kind of liked it when he did that. 

ME: I told you not to call me that, Bravo.

DIETER: My apologies…Kit Kat.

I rolled my eyes. He was never going to let that nickname go. 

ME: What are you up to this evening, besides liking all my posts?

DIETER: I was painting until my phone started blowing up with Instagram notifications.

ME: Oh yeah? What are you working on?

DIETER: Something new…it’s a secret.

My brow furrowed. What a weird response. He’s usually very open and excited to talk about his hobbies. 

ME: Oh come on, not even a hint?

A picture came through. It was obviously a close up shot of part of a painting. It just looked like swirls of purples, magenta, and black with oranges and yellows at the edge. I couldn’t tell what it was, but I was intrigued.

ME: Those are new colors for you. I like them.

DIETER: Well, I have new inspiration...

Why was he being so cryptic? It was causing butterflies in my stomach again.

ME: And that inspiration is…what?

DIETER: My 🐈, of course.

Why didn’t he just say Zee? Unless he thought he was being slick with double meanings? Surely not. I held my breath as I typed my reply, then hit send without reading it. 

ME: Your feline or your human 🐈?

He started typing, then stopped. It took him a good thirty seconds before he started again. 

DIETER: I’m afraid you’ve hit your question and answer quota for today. My turn. What are you up to this evening?

I snorted, this was about to take a turn. Did I want to go there? I decided to keep it PG, not wanting to make it weird. 

ME: Just trying to relax my aching bones.

DIETER: And how does my human 🐈 do that? No hints? 😏

My thighs clenched together. He did not just fucking say that. I wasn’t sure how to respond. Were we flirting? I chewed on my bottom lip as I thought through my options. Another message popped up.

DIETER: I’m sorry. That might have been a little inappropriate to say.

He was one hundred percent flirting and now worried he overstepped. Alright Bravo, if you’re gonna go there…then I am too. 

ME: If I give you an inappropriate hint, will you answer my question?

DIETER: That depends on how inappropriate your hint is…

I chewed my lip again, thinking. I muttered a quiet “Fuck it” as I propped my bubble covered legs up on the side of the tub and snapped a picture. It’s not like he hadn’t seen more than that from my costumes. Then again, this implied I was currently naked and wet. 

I decided not to send it through Instagram, instead pulling up his contact info and sending it as a text. I felt nauseous afterward, worried I was misreading things. He was taking entirely too long to respond. The bubbles finally started bouncing, indicating he was typing.

DIETER: I feel cheated. Your toes are cropped out. Your answer is a no go.

I snorted. He obviously didn’t have a problem with it.

ME: Please tell me you don’t have a thing for feet. That’s just gross.

DIETER: I’ll take what I can get. I’m not picky. Besides, you probably wouldn’t say that after one of my foot massages.

My thighs clenched again. Fuck. Why is that doing things to me? Probably because it implies he’s good with his hands…his very large hands.

ME: Are you offering?

DIETER: All you have to do is ask, honey. I’ll do anything I can to help you feel better. 😉

Fuuuuck. I can't deal with him. He was sending my mind spiraling straight into the gutter. For a brief moment, I wondered if my vibrator was charged before scolding myself for going there. I was so fucking ridiculous. How did I go from being distraught over my ex cheating on me to this? I needed to chill and get my life figured out before I ruined mine and Dieter’s friendship. 

ME: Well, I hate to cut this conversation short, but my water is getting cold. I’ll see you in the morning?

DIETER: Of course. And for the record, I do have a hydrotherapy tub that doesn’t get cold. You can use it anytime.

DIETER: I swear I’m not trying to be weird with that. I know it helps with arthritis pain. 😂

I laughed, almost tempted to ask if it would fit two people but refrained. I knew he was only trying to be helpful. 

ME: That’s good to know. 😂. Go to bed. I’ll see you in the morning.

DIETER: I will do as I’m told. Goodnight Kit Kat.

ME: Goodnight.

I got ready for bed after that. My mind was now jumping all over the place. I realized that I hadn’t heard from Alec since leaving his apartment, which was unusual for him. Normally he would be blowing up my phone with calls and texts. Maybe he knew it was over this time and wasn’t even going to bother to try to fix it. I could only hope that was the case because I didn’t want to deal with him. 

Then my thoughts went back to Dieter. I was so confused about my feelings for him. I wanted him physically, yes. That much was obvious. What I didn’t know was what I wanted beyond that. I wasn’t sure if I could trust what I was feeling. How much of it was real and how much of it was a result of our situation? We were both in a perfect storm of emotions, looking for happiness and somehow finding it in each other through dancing. 

It’s not unusual for dance partners to fall for each other because the physical closeness and intimacy involved does cause the release of oxytocin in the brain. That fact is common knowledge among dancers, and it fuels the long debate about if the dance connection between partners is real or if it’s just a temporary psychological effect from hormones. Is that what was happening here? Would the intense feelings for him fade once the show was over? It was certainly something to consider. 

Granted, I’ve had a lot of dance partners in my life and never felt like this before. It was similar with Alec, but nowhere near as intense and those feelings with him waned over time. However, I could attribute that to his shitty personality and the way he treated me. We still danced together, so in the end that didn’t save us either. 

By the time I finally started to fall asleep, I was more confused and conflicted than ever. I decided that I would just go with it and see what happened. It was really the only thing I could do. It wasn’t like Dieter had expressed interest in anything more anyway. He was in recovery after all and did say he was taking a break from dating as part of that process. So, I was probably getting myself worked up over nothing. 

The next morning, I awoke feeling surprisingly lighter and more relaxed. The prospect of being done with Alec for good seemed to remove a lot of pent up stress and anxiety. Plus, Friday rehearsals typically went pretty easy for us since we had our routine down. It was just about fine tuning with the music now, allowing us to have a little more fun with it. 

When I got to the dance studio, Dieter hadn’t arrived yet. I wasted a few minutes getting the music ready and stretching. Then I checked the time, realizing he was a few minutes late. I was suddenly worried that something might be wrong, he was usually a few minutes early if not right on time. I was reaching for my phone to send him a quick text when he walked through the door with his cell phone to his ear. He looked a little wild-eyed as he said his goodbyes to end the call, but also seemed to be fighting a smile.

Once he was finished, he dropped his bag onto the floor and gave me a cheesy grin. 

I gave him a confused look, “What’s going on?” 

He put one hand on his hip, the other was rubbing his chin. “Well, I got invited to do SNL. I didn’t think that would ever happen again.”

I gave him a toothy smile, “Dieter, that’s awesome. I’m excited for you!”

He held up his pointer finger and grimaced, “Slight problem though…” He paused. 

I raised my brows, waiting for him to continue. 

“It’s for next week. That Gosling dude dropped out at the last minute, and they don’t have a lot of options.”

My face fell, “How’s that supposed to work?”

He laughed nervously, “Well, how do you feel about going to New York with me for the week…so we can still rehearse?”

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I can’t do that. “Dieter, I don’t know if the producers will allow that.”

He was smirking now, “Actually, Lenny, my manager, talked to them this morning and they’re willing to make it work if you’re willing to go with. We would just have to film some things ourselves and there was something mentioned about promo stuff but I dunno what all that entails.”   

Fuck. He was really excited about this. I could tell from the look on his face. I knew this was a big deal for him and for his career. I really didn’t want to be the one thing to hold him back, but I needed to think about it - consider how it could affect things between us. 

“When do you have to let them know something by?” I asked.

“By tomorrow morning, but preferably as soon as possible.”

I nodded. “OK, let me think about it and figure out what exactly that means for us, work wise, if we go. I’d like to know those details first.”

He was nodding along now, “That makes sense. I know it’s short notice and a lot of extra stuff you were not planning on doing, so if you don’t want to, that’s OK. I swear. I don’t want you to feel pressured. I think we can make it work though…and I think it would be fun for us.”

I chuckled, “What I’m not fun enough for you already?” 

His eyes bulged, “No! That’s not what I meant. You know what I mean…and…I did also wanna ask if you’d be willing to do a skit with me.”

I snorted, “What? Like a SNL skit?!?!”

He nodded, “Yes. I have an idea for one.”

I shook my head, “Dieter, I’m not an actor. I can’t…do that.”

He rolled his eyes, “Sure you can. It could be one of the pre-recorded skits, so you don’t have to worry about the live part. I can coach you through it.” 

I took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. He seemed like he really wanted to do this, “What’s the idea?” 

He snickered, “Well…you remember when you said ‘Nobody puts Bravo in the corner’?”

I wasn’t following, “Yeeesss…”

“Well, I think it would be fun to do a Dirty Dancing parody, with the roles reversed.” 

I snorted, “You’re so fucking ridiculous.” 

He burst into laughter, “I know, that’s what makes it funny! It’ll be gold! Come on!” 

I sighed, “Let me think about it. I’ll let you know something in the morning, ok? It’s not a no…yet.”

He huffed and crossed his arms over his chest like a petulant child, “Ooook, fine. I’ll wait for you to think about it.” 

I rolled my eyes at him, then poked him in the chest, “Don’t be bugging me about it either, or I’ll say no.” 

He smirked, “OK. OK. Got it. Let’s rehearse then. I’m ready to get my Jive on today.” 

Dieter did his best Elvis hip wiggle on that last line, curling his lip upward as he spoke. It sent me into a fit of laughter that I struggled to come back from. This set the tone for the rest of the day. He seemed to be in an exceptionally good mood, even for him. The jokes kept coming one after another and he was acting a complete fool the entire time. I’m not sure we ever stopped laughing. He didn’t take himself seriously and I loved that about him. Alec had been the complete opposite, an uptight asshole, which often kept me on edge. It was a nice change, one that I wouldn’t mind being permanent.   

I was actually a little sad once rehearsals were over. We had a good day, and I wasn’t ready for it to end, but I needed to go home and figure out what to do about New York. After we said our goodbyes, I sent a quick text to Stacia and Joe. I needed to know what they were thinking because it sounded like they had a plan. As I was pulling into my garage, my cell rang. It was Joe asking if I could come in for a quick meeting the following morning. I agreed, which was essentially the end of the conversation. 

I had a million questions and did not understand how this was going to work. What about group rehearsals? Or the weekly behind the scenes filming? And what promo stuff would we be doing? Most of all, how the hell would we fit all this in around Dieter’s SNL schedule? It seemed like a lot, but I would be doing it with Dieter. Something told me that if I did go, things would not be the same when we got back. I just didn’t know if that was good or bad. 

The following morning, I had to get up extra early so I could go to Television City Studios to meet with Stacia and Joe. I thought it odd that they didn’t ask to meet with both Dieter and I together, so it automatically had me on edge. The fact that they had agreed to this told me that it was playing into whatever story they were trying to manufacture. So, I knew I had to watch myself. 

Surprisingly, I didn’t have to wait. I was taken back to the conference room straight away where I found Stacia and Joe in unusually bubbly moods. They were chomping at the bit to follow through with whatever they had planned for us. 

Once I was seated, I noticed Stacia looking at me oddly. I couldn’t figure out what it was about. She eventually realized I had noticed her staring, which prompted her to get things started.

“Kat, how are you doing? Everything still going OK with Dieter?”

My brow furrowed slightly, “Yeah, everything with Dieter is great. He’s doing well.” 

She nodded, “Good. That’s what we like to hear. So, I guess he told you about New York then based on your call?”

I nodded, “He did. I was surprised to hear that you guys approved it. I’m curious to hear your plans because I don’t understand how we can possibly pull this off. It’s a lot.” 

Joe smiled, “Actually, I think we can work it out pretty easily. We’re thinking you could take a break from group performances next week. In lieu of that, we can book you on a couple of morning shows. That would meet part of your contract obligations so that some of that stuff is out of the way.”

I took a minute to think about that, it wouldn’t be a bad thing. It would keep me away from Alec for the week too. 

“OK, and what about the behind the scenes filming? Will a crew be coming with us?”

Stacia laughed, “Na, I really don’t think that’s necessary. Dieter can handle some of the filming if we provide the equipment. We also ask that you two ramp up your social media posting a little bit more…maybe even come up with a hashtag or something.” 

They are being way too cool about this. What’s the catch? 

“Where will we rehearse?”

Stacia was still smiling as she continued to stare at me in that odd way, “We’ll book you a space in the hotel. You can rehearse as you have time. It obviously won’t be as structured as it is now, but we think you can work it out.”

How had they figured all of this shit out so quickly? What made them think I would even agree to go?

I pursed my lips in thought. “And our Tuesday morning pre-production meeting?”

“You won’t have to worry about that. We can go over everything now.” 

My brows knitted together, “Without Dieter?” 

Joe smiled politely, “We trust that you can pass the info along to him with no problem.” 

I narrowed my eyes at them, “Why didn’t you meet with both of us together about this?”

Stacia leaned forward, placing her hand on the table in a gesture that was meant to be comforting. “We wanted to run it by you without his influence. I didn’t want you to feel pressured by his presence. His manager made it pretty clear that he really wants to do this.”

I scoffed, “I appreciate the thought, but Dieter would never pressure me into anything. So that wasn’t necessary. I would appreciate it if we could keep our meetings together.” 

Stacia’s lips set into a tight line, “My mistake. Perhaps I should have asked first. Anyway, as far as the plans for next week, we have you doing the Rumba to Thinking Out Loud.” 

The fucking Rumba. Perfect. It was obvious she was fighting a smirk now as she dug around in her binder, and I knew why. The Rumba was one of the most intimate and sensual performances in ballroom dance. It was obvious they were doing everything they could to milk this situation. 

Stacia pulled some papers out, sketches for our costumes. “Luckily, we already had these ready to go. Dieter’s is pretty simple and shouldn’t be an issue. Stop by wardrobe before your spray tans tomorrow evening and they’ll have something similar ready for you to try on. They’ll rework parts of it to make it more like this. We wanna make sure your costumes are ahead of schedule just in case you have travel delays or anything like that.”

I sat staring at them wide-eyed, “Why are you telling me all this? I haven’t agreed.” 

Joe laughed nervously, “Well it’ll be the same details even if you don’t go. Just don’t tell the others you got your dance and song early or they’ll consider it an unfair advantage.”

No shit. This is so fucking bizarre. 

Stacia leaned forward on her elbows, “So, Kat…What are ya thinking? Is it manageable enough for you? Anything else we can do to make this easy on you?” 

What the actual fuck? The crease between my brows deepened. 

“No…I think I’m good. I’ll let you guys know what I decide. Anything else?”

Stacia leaned back in her seat, eyeing me in that weird way she had been since I arrived. “How’s Alec doing?”

I could feel my hackles rise. Why the fuck does she keep doing this? I glared at her for a moment before composing myself, somehow managing a small smile, “Alec is doing just fine...” With his fucking tramp. “If that’s all, I need to get going. I don’t wanna keep Dieter waiting for rehearsals.”

They both smiled, “Of course. We don’t wanna cut into your time, obviously.” Stacia added. 

I got out of there as quickly as I could. I was feeling frustrated and angry. It was obvious what they were up to, again pushing us together for their narrative. However, what frustrated me most was that I knew it might actually cause something to happen between us…or at least I wanted it to. This couldn’t have been set up any better for them.

On the drive to the dance studio, I considered my options. The most attractive thing about going was being away from Alec for a week and not having to dance with him. Fuck. I still have to dance with him on Monday. That was going to go over well. Maybe Emily will swap me with one of the other dancers. That’s going to be a big red flag to the entire cast, and they’ll instantly know something is up, but I guess it’s inevitable. They’re going to know eventually anyway. I was also going to have to face Alec at some point. I needed to prepare myself for that. 

I did need to consider Dieter in this. It was a big deal for him, I could tell. I didn’t want to be the only thing keeping him from doing something that could have a major impact on his career. I was also wondering what it would be like to spend the week with him, away from all this. It would allow us to get to know each other a little better, outside of the studio. It would also give me a chance to see him at work, which I was strangely curious about too. 

I pulled into a parking spot with a few minutes to spare. I sat there going through the pros and cons. There were only two cons that I could think of. One, which was honestly also a pro, something might happen between us. Two, if something did happen, it could ruin our friendship. Was the risk worth it? If Dieter is as amazing as I feel like he is and he wants to be with me, then yes. I think it might be worth it. 

I took a deep breath, then exhaled slowly to calm my nerves. “I can’t believe I’m gonna do this.” 

After a few more deep breaths, I grabbed my bag, got out of the car, and started walking toward the main entrance to the dance studio before I changed my mind. I found Dieter sprawled out on the floor, looking at his phone. He dropped the phone on his chest when I walked in, a smile spreading across his face as he greeted me. 

“There you are! I was about to text you. You’re later than normal.” 

He sat upright and slid his phone across the floor toward his bag. He moved to get up, but I stopped him. “Stay there. We can start our stretches on the floor.” 

He nodded, eyeing me as I sat my bag down and dug my water bottle out. When I turned to face him, he was looking at me expectantly. I knew he was waiting for my answer, but he wasn’t going to ask. I was tempted to wait until the end of rehearsal to tell him, but I knew he needed to know. 

I sat down in front of him and started stretching. He didn’t make any move to stretch with me, instead he continued to stare, his brows arching further into his hairline by the second. 

“Is there a reason you’re not stretching?” I asked, pretending I didn’t know what he was waiting on. 

He scoffed, “Are you messing with me right now?” 

A smile tugged at my lips, I couldn’t fight it. 

A tentative smile spread across his face once he realized it, “You’re gonna go with me?” 

I nodded. He jumped up, leaned down, and pulled me to my feet before I even realized what was happening. His arms wrapped around my middle, lifting me off the floor in a tight hug as he spun us around, thanking me over and over again. I laughed at his overly dramatic reaction, but I knew his excitement was real. 

He finally sat me down, holding my shoulder briefly to make sure I had my footing. 

“Kat, you seriously just made my day. This is a big fucking deal for me right now.” 

“I know. I don’t want you to miss out on the opportunity. It’s gonna be a lot of work though. You know that right?” 

He nodded, maybe a little too enthusiastically. “I’ll work my ass off, I promise…oh! I need to text Lenny so he can get things moving.” 

He ran over to grab his phone off the floor and started tapping away. 

“So, when do we need to leave?” I asked. 

He paused and stared at the ceiling, like he was doing calculations.

“Umm…” He grimaced. “Tomorrow, like right after the show is over probably? I don’t know the flight times though. We might have to do a red-eye.” 

It was my turn to grimace, “Oof. That’s rough. Damn, when are we gonna have time to pack?”

He shrugged, “You think we’re far enough ahead this week to cut out a few hours early? We do have the fucking spray tans later this evening. Ugh, can we skip that?” 

I chuckled, “I doubt it. Maybe we can next week though? Hopefully.” 

I looked at the time. “Let's get four hours in and see how we’re feeling. If all is well, I say we go pack. Otherwise, we’ll be up late doing that.” 

He nodded, “Sounds like a plan.”  

I watched as he opened the camera on his phone and put it in selfie mode, “Guess we better start our social media campaign.” 

He quickly leaned in, snapping a pic of himself and half of my head. I laughed, “I’m sure they’re gonna love that one.” 

He snickered as he tapped away at his phone for a couple more minutes, before setting it back down next to his bag. Suddenly, my phone dinged with an Instagram notification. Well, that’s embarrassing. He looked at me with narrowed eyes, “Do you have notifications turned on for my posts?” 

I shook my head, turning away as I fought a nervous smile, “No…of course not.” 

He stepped in front of me and placed his pointer finger under my chin, raising it so that I was looking at him. I felt the heat of his touch jolt through my entire body as he gave me the cockiest smirk. 

“Say that to my face, please.” 

I couldn’t say it without smiling, I was the worst liar. “I-umm…”

His smirk turned into his cheesy lopsided grin as he tapped my nose with his finger, “That’s what I thought…Don’t worry Kit Kat. I know you love me. You don’t have to hide it.” 

He said it with a teasing tone, but that didn’t stop my eyes from widening at his words. “I-I just figured if we have to do all this social media stuff, I wanna know what you're posting about me. That’s all. Don’t get any crazy ideas.” 

He chuckled, “Mmmhmm. Sure. I’m on to you.” 

I scoffed and rolled my eyes, “Whatever, Bravo. Get to stretching so we can get out of here.” 

He locked eyes with me, leaning in as he spoke. “Yes ma’am. Where do you want me?” 

What. The. Fuck. Is that? I was fairly certain that I stopped breathing. His eyes were smoldering - absolutely burning into my soul. I cleared my throat, “O-On the floor.” 

That came out breathier than I had intended. He arched a brow at me. 

“You need to stretch.” I reminded him.

His eyes darted around my face as his teeth sunk into his bottom lip, trying to hold back a smile. Something told me that he knew exactly what he was doing. New York was going to be interesting.

Once I managed to get him focused, we hit rehearsals hard. The Jive was not an easy dance, so we were exhausted by the time our four hours were up. My hips and feet were beginning to ache. That figures. Just before a long ass flight too. 

We were feeling pretty good about where things were, so we did end up leaving early to go pack before the cast spray tan session. When I got home, I quickly checked Dieter’s Instagram post before I got started.

I felt a rush of excitement when I saw the post. He really put #SheSecretlyLovesMe as a fucking hashtag? I wasn’t prepared for that. It was obviously a joke, but something about it felt a little flirty. There was also something about seeing a selfie of us together. It wasn’t like one of the performance shots from the show. This was personal and intimate in a weird way. We were letting the public into what I thought was our carefully crafted bubble. 

I had to push those thoughts out of my head, I didn’t have time for that now because I had to rush to pack. It was a struggle, half of my laundry was dirty because I hadn’t felt like doing it. I had to get creative with my outfit choices for the week, only having time to wash and dry one load. I managed to get most of it taken care of before it was time to leave for our latest spray tan session. 

During the drive over, I could feel my nervousness setting in over the possibility of seeing Alec and Lana. Not knowing how they were going to act toward me or behave toward each other was the biggest cause of it. Their behavior had the potential to cause some serious drama.  

Once I got to Television City Studios, I waited in my car until I saw Dieter arrive. I didn’t want to chance getting cornered by Alec or Lana alone. By the time I moved to get out, Dieter was already there with a questioning look on his face.

“What are you doing? Hiding in your car?” 

I laughed nervously, “I wasn’t hiding…I was just taking care of some last minute stuff.” I lied. 

He nodded, “Yeah, I feel you on that. I’ve had to make a long list of instructions for my assistant. He’s on plant and cat duty while I’m gone.” 

I chuckled, “Shouldn’t he be coming with you?”

Dieter snickered, “Umm, normally he would, yes. But he can run my calendar and boss me around remotely. I guess I need to find a permanent plant and cat sitter for when I’m gone though…”  

He looked pensive for a moment, “Are there professionals that do that sort of thing? Like certified? I’m pretty picky about that shit…I can’t leave them with just any random person. Especially Zee. She’s probably gonna be a mess while I’m gone...” 

I would’ve laughed at him if he didn’t look completely serious and sincere with his words. Could he be anymore fucking adorable? The care that he gave to his plants and Zee was completely melting my heart. If I knew nothing else about him, that alone would probably make me fall for him. 

I stood there taking in his expression, his lips pursed as he considered the question before he reached to rub at the back of his neck and sighed. The prospect of having to find someone to fill those important shoes while he was out of town seemed like a massive feat for him. My mind wandered, questioning if that was something I could do for him - take care of the things he cared about most when he couldn’t. I found myself wanting to. I wanted to take care of him. 

I suddenly realized Dieter was staring at me with questioning eyes. Shit, he said something to me, didn’t he?

I shook my head, “I’m sorry, what?” 

He smiled nervously, “Are you ok? You seem a little distracted. Am I boring you with my plant and cat problems?”

I gave him a genuine smile, “Absolutely not. I love hearing about your cat and plants.” We started walking toward the front entrance. “Please never stop telling me about them.” I added. 

He chuckled shyly, “If it gets annoying, just tell me to shut the fuck up. I know that I get carried away sometimes.” 

I shook my head, “You will never hear that from me.” 

He reached to pull the door open for me, then lightly placed his hand at the small of my back as he followed me through the door. His touch caused sparks at the base of my spin that shot out all the way to my fingertips and toes. I don’t know why because he often touched me there while we were dancing. This was nothing new. I can only assume it had to do with how casually he touched me off the dance floor these days. Especially since he had such an aversion to it in the beginning. 

We made our way toward the dressing rooms, eventually parting ways so we could get changed for our spray tans. Just as I was closing the door behind me, Alec and Lana passed by. Figures they would be here already. I sighed. I really did not want to be alone around them. 

I toed off my shoes, then stood there for a moment, feeling like there was something I was supposed to do. Then suddenly I realized I had forgotten that we were supposed to go to the wardrobe department first. “Shit.”

I grabbed my phone to text Dieter. I wasn’t even sure if he knew we were supposed to do that. 

Me: Hey, I forgot…we’re supposed to check in with wardrobe about next week’s costumes before tanning. 

Dieter: That would make sense…heading your way. 

There was a knock at the door. I turned to open it without a glance. Instead, I wandered around the room to find my flip flops as Dieter pushed the door open and leaned against the door frame with his arm above his head. Once I had my shoes on and moved toward the door, I was taken aback by how good he looked. I’m almost certain I froze on the spot as my eyes scanned up his broad towering form. It must have been obvious what was going through my head based on the smirk that appeared on his lips when my gaze finally met his. 

“You see something you like, honey?” He said in a husky voice. 

I swallowed thickly, “No, I see someone who’s standing in my way. Are you gonna move?” 

He chuckled, stepping to the side to let me pass, but I hesitated. Tensing once I caught sight of Alec and Lana walking back down the hallway toward the spray tan room. Alec’s back was toward us, but Lana’s was not. Her eyes connected with mine, she gave me a curious smile as they passed by. I could feel my jaw tighten as I inhaled a deep breath. I felt Dieter’s hand on the small of my back again, grounding me from whatever spiral I was about to go down. 

I felt him lean in close to my ear. “Kat is everything ok?” he asked quietly. 

“Yeah, of course. Let’s go.” 

He gave me an odd look before motioning for me to exit through the doorway. He followed, closing the door behind us. 

Minutes later we found ourselves in the wardrobe department, Amy and her assistant were in a tizzy trying to find clothing in the proper size for us. Apparently, Dieter had slimmed down some since rehearsals started, which wasn’t unusual given how much exercise we were getting. So, they had to size his black pants down. They were still having an issue with the white button up shirt being too tight in the shoulders and chest. Of course they are, because he’s so fucking broad.

His slightly smaller waist was now emphasizing just how broad he actually was. I couldn’t help staring at his reflection in the mirror as they fussed over him, pinning and marking for alterations at the waist of the shirt as they joked about how many buttons he would need to leave open so he could move properly without ripping the shoulder seams. 

As I took him in, I noticed the pants were a different style than what they usually gave him. The fit was snugger in the thighs and ass, emphasizing all the right parts of him. Add that to the way the plain white button up shirt was hugging his biceps and shoulders…it nearly had me salivating like a crazed animal. Who knew such a simple outfit could look so fucking hot on a man. 

My attention was drawn back to the conversation happening around me when Amy asked with a sly smile what I thought about the costume. Fuck, she totally caught me ogling him. My eyes were drawn to Dieter’s in the mirror. He was smirking at me as he waited for an answer. Busted. Again. If I kept this up, he was eventually going to ask me point blank what my fucking problem is. 

I cleared my throat, “I mean…I think it looks great. Can’t go wrong with the classics.” 

They seemed happy with their handiwork at that point. Helping him remove this shirt so that he didn’t get stuck with pins. Meanwhile, I was ogling him again. I did not need to see him like this because he looked too fucking good. It seemed like his belly had shrunk some, but he was still soft around the middle, the way I liked. His shoulders and chest seemed more sculpted if that were even possible. I had to force myself to turn away before I got caught again, though from the cocky glances I noticed Dieter shooting my way, I think I may already have been.

After that, Dieter was off to the changing room to put his clothes back on and it was my turn to be poked and prodded at. They had put me in a backless white dress that had a low cut sparkly bodice and a feathered bottom half. It looked nothing like the sketch Stacia had shown me, but I didn’t question it. 

“Alright Kat, instead of making yours from scratch, I’m gonna rework this one. That way we at least have the sizing on the bodice and straps worked out.” She turned, grabbing a bolt of fabric, offering it to me to look at. 

“I’m gonna redo the bottom half with a sheer white fabric that I’ve ordered. It’ll have silver threading and beading to match the bodice. It’s similar to this but has a little more bling and it’ll be more romantic and flowy looking.”

I nodded, “Sounds good. I trust that it’ll look amazing with you in charge.” 

Dieter was behind me now, coming closer to inspect the bolt of fabric I was holding before letting his eyes scan over every inch of the dress. He arched an eyebrow and smiled at Amy, “I think that’s gonna look awesome, Amy. Then again, Kat can make a potato sack look amazing.”

He turned away, like he hadn’t just dropped a bomb, going to stand out of the way so Amy could get to work. I was shocked over his comment as I turned to Amy with my mouth slightly agape, catching a look pass between her and her assistant. Great, there’s some gossip for the cast to spread around.   

After Amy was satisfied with her alterations, they left Dieter and I alone for a few minutes to go pull shoe options for me. I decided to break the tension by suggesting we snap a quick picture for Instagram, figuring we might as well get into a habit of it now. Dieter leaned over in front of the mirror with a small smile while I snapped a few pictures with my phone. I took the opportunity to make a teaser post that we had big plans for the following week.

A few seconds after posting it, Dieter’s phone chimed in his pocket. I gave him a smug look, “Now who has Instagram alerts turned on?”  

He shrugged, “I mean, if you’re gonna be making posts about me…I wanna know what you're saying.” 

I narrowed my eyes and nodded, “Mmmhmm. Sure.” 

Amy returned then, offering me four options for shoes. Once I made my choice, I went to change out of the costume. We hustled to get back to our dressing rooms so we could change into our “spray tan” gear, then made our way to where the cast was congregating to wait their turn. They had already started the session, but to my dismay, Alec and Lana were still waiting. I had hoped they were done and gone already. I made a point to stay as far away from them as possible while also trying to not look in their direction. Of course, Dieter noticed. 

“Is Alec too good to talk to you when I’m around now?” he asked, eyeing them on the other side of the room. 

I sighed, “He probably hasn’t noticed me. It’s not a big deal.” 

His brows furrowed, “Oh he one hundred percent noticed you. I saw him looking…”

I felt panic rising in my chest and my face tensing, “I said it’s not a big deal. Drop it.”  There was no way I could explain what happened without getting emotional right now. I didn’t want to give Alec that satisfaction.

Dieter gave me a look of confusion but didn’t question it further. If he hadn’t realized something was up before, he definitely did now. I changed the subject, more so to give myself something else to focus on than anything, “You wanna grab some dinner after this? I’m starving.”

He gave me a guarded look, “Sure. What did you have in mind?”

I thought for a moment, “I’m thinking burritos. It’s a burrito kind of day.” 

He nodded, “I think I can get behind that.” 

We managed to avoid Alec and Lana for the reminder of our time there. Luckily, we didn’t have to wait long before one of the production assistants called us in. The staff had apparently been told to get us through as quickly as possible, which I appreciated. Stacia and Joe had actually done something right for once. 

Dieter and I finished up with our spray tans around the same time. I took advantage of it and walked back toward the dressing rooms with him, still paranoid about running into Alec or Lana. Luckily, we didn’t. We briefly parted to our respective dressing rooms to change. I was digging around in my gym bag, trying to find my shirt when Dieter knocked at the door. I yelled for him to come, not paying him any attention as I got more aggravated that I couldn’t find what I was looking for. 

I puffed air out through my cheeks and placed my hands on my hips, confused as to why I couldn't find my shirt. I finally met Dieter’s wide-eyed gaze, now realizing I was standing there in jeans and a black push-up bra. 

I sighed, “Put your eyes back in your head, Bravo. It’s not like you haven’t seen me in athletic wear before.” 

He laughed nervously, “That’s true…however, athletic wear doesn’t emphasize things like that.” 

I rolled my eyes at him as he tried not to stare at my chest. He eventually leaned down and picked something up that must have fallen out of my bag.

“That what you’re looking for?” he asked as he handed it to me. 

My forehead dropped into my palm as I sighed, “Yes…it is. Thank you. I thought I forgot it.” 

After throwing the t-shirt over my head, I started gathering my belongings. He watched me intently as I shoved things into my bag more forcefully than necessary. I wasn’t even sure why I was suddenly so irritated. I assume it was from seeing that asshat with her again. 

“Kat, did something happen? You know you can tell me. I feel like something’s going on with you the last couple of days.” He said gently.

Great job hiding it, Kat. I turned to face him, fighting back my emotions before I responded. “Yes. Ok. Something happened…but…I-I don’t wanna talk about it right now. Can we just have a normal evening? Please? I promise I’ll tell you. I just need time to process it.” 

His brow furrowed as anger flashed in his eyes. 

I shook my head, “He didn’t hurt me, if that’s what you're thinking. It’s…not that.” It seemed to calm him knowing that much at least. I shoved the last of my stuff in my bag and zipped it up.  

“Come on. Take me to get some food…please.” 

He opened the door, allowing me to walk out ahead of him. We were quiet until we got to the parking lot. I opened the trunk, threw my bag in, then turned to Dieter, “You’re driving.” 

He arched a brow at me and smiled, “Yes ma’am.” 

I followed him over to his car and plopped down in the passenger seat as he threw his bag into the back. Once he got situated behind the wheel, he grabbed a pair of glasses and popped them on his face. I couldn’t help admiring how adorable he looked with his glasses and messy hair. He glanced at me, looking slightly worried, “What? Is my spray tan fucked up or something?” 

I chuckled, “No. Just admiring your glasses.” 

He smirked, turning his head forward and starting the car. As we were on our way, I called in a pickup order. Dieter gave me an odd look but didn’t question it. After disconnecting the call, I tried to lighten the mood by asking about Zee. That seemed to do the trick, keeping him talking until we got to the restaurant. We sat in the parking lot, waiting for the text that our food was ready. After about forty-five minutes of waiting, Dieter was beginning to get impatient as his stomach grumbled loudly. 

Just as he started his tirade of complaints, I snapped a quick picture of him making his annoyed face, snickering as I posted it to Instagram before he even realized what was happening. His phone chimed with an alert. He paused mid-sentence, narrowing his eyes in my direction. 

“What did you just post?” he asked sternly, before cracking a smile. 

I shrugged, “Might as well get used to it. If we have to post social media shit, I’m gonna be as obnoxious as possible with it.” 

He looked at his phone and snorted, “Fucking hell, Kat. OK…it’s on now. Just remember anything that I post going forward is your fault. You started this.”

I rolled my eyes at him, “Whatever you say, Bravo.”

My phone dinged with a text that our food was ready. I moved to get out, but Dieter locked the door on me. 

“I got it. You sit,” he said sternly. 

I scoffed, “Well…OK then.” 

He was back within minutes, shaking his head as he handed me the food through the window. Once he was back in the driver’s seat he gave me an exasperated look. 

“What’s wrong?” I asked. 

“Apparently the girl working the front is a Dieterina shipper. I got questioned out about why the food was in your name and why I was the one picking it up. Like that means something…” 

My head dropped back against the seat, “Great. Here we go with that stuff…they’ll look for anything.”

I felt my stomach do a little flip at the thought of it meaning something. It didn’t bother me as much as it once did. Especially now that Alec was out of the picture. However, I didn’t want Dieter to be associated with that new development in any way. He didn’t need a reputation as a home wrecker to add to his list.

Once we decided that we would eat in the car, I began filling him in on the details from my meeting with Stacia and Joe - not having told him everything yet. We got a head start on discussing our dance for the following week as I pulled up the song to listen to while we devoured our burritos. We sat in silence, listening to it in full, twice. I could feel the tension forming between us as the realization set in of how intimate this dance was about to be. All while we were off on our own together in New York. 

We sat almost a little stunned as we considered our options for the Rumba. I finally suggested we think on it and discuss it more once we made it through the Jive. It felt like an added pressure to worry about it right now. At least it did for me now that I was thinking of everything else that was coming at us with it. 

After we finished eating, he dropped me off at my car so I could head home for the evening. Once home, I rushed to finish up the last of my packing since we would be leaving for the airport directly from the studio after the show was over. I wasn’t even sure of most of our travel details. I just knew a car would be picking me up in the morning. As bad as it sounded, I was relying on Dieter to know what was going on since his people were working with both studios to figure everything out. It was a little nerve wrecking, but I brushed it off as I crawled into bed and passed out from the exhaustion the last few days had brought. 

I was in a rush the following morning, double checking that I had everything and also trying to get ready before my ride was due to arrive at 7AM. I was beginning to feel overwhelmed with everything to come as I stood at the kitchen counter, reading through an email from Stacia and Joe with my schedule of promo appearances for the week when a text came through from Dieter. I checked the time. It was 6:55 AM. Confused as to why he was texting me so early, I switched to my messenger app. 

Dieter: Your ride is here. Do you need any help?

A crease formed between my brows, “What the fu…” 

I walked over to look out through the curtains. Sure enough, I could see Dieter through the open back window of a SUV that was sitting in my driveway. My phone dinged again. 

Dieter: Also, your plants look sad. I’m disappointed in you. Have I taught you nothing? 😂

I rolled my eyes.

ME: First of all, shut up about my plants. I do not have a green thumb and I have accepted that. I’ll be out in a minute. 

I hurried around, double checking that everything was turned off and locked up before grabbing my bags and heading out the front door. The driver got out of the car, rushing to help me. He took my bags as Dieter pushed his door open and slid to the opposite side of the car so I could get in without having to walk around.

I got in and sat down with a huff, “I wasn’t aware that I would be riding with you this morning.”

He shrugged and handed me a coffee, “Ehh, it’s on the way.” 

I gave him a confused look, “No it’s not.” 

He chuckled nervously, “It is if I’m getting coffee…and take the long way.” 

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. He was so extra sometimes. 

He elbowed me gently, “Hey…about your plants…can I send someone over to take care of that for you? I don’t like sad plants.” 

I snorted, “You’re joking…”

His eyes widened, like he had been caught doing something he shouldn’t, “Yeees. Totally joking.” 

I gasped, “You’re not joking!” 

He shook his head, “No. I’m kind of serious…actually.” 

My head shook from side to side, “Dieter…no. Absolutely not.” 

He pouted like a petulant child in that way he does. 

I poked him in the arm, “Stop that right now. I’ll take care of them when I get back.”

“When you get back!?!?! They’ll be dead by then!” he said dramatically. 

I couldn’t help laughing at him, it was honestly cute that he cared that much.

“I’ll have my assistant stop by to water them. He’s on plant duty anyway.” 

I scoffed, “Dieter…no.” 

“Shhhh. It’s happening. I’m not discussing it any further.” He waved his hand dismissively in my direction as he turned his attention to tapping at his phone.

My mouth dropped open in shock over his sassy attitude, “Did you just…” 

“Yes. Now be quiet, I need to concentrate to type up these instructions.” 

He gave me the side-eye with a small smile tugging at his lips. I shoved his leg with mine as he burst out laughing. So, this is how this week is gonna go. 

After arriving at Television City Studios, the driver helped unload our bags so we could store them in our dressing rooms. We got several odd looks as we wheeled our luggage through the lobby and down the dressing room hallway. The sight was sure to cause some gossip since no one knew about our plans for the upcoming week. 

Once we dropped off our luggage, Dieter and I headed to the ballroom to get the first few run throughs with the band and camera blocking out of the way. I tried not to pay attention to the eyes on us because I knew Alec and Lana were among them, but by the time we finished, I could feel my nerves setting in. I would have to face Alec soon enough for the group performance dress rehearsal. 

I spent a fair amount of my time in the hair and makeup chair trying to focus and not let that asshole get to me, determined not to let him mess me up today. I knew Dieter could sense my tension from the way he kept looking at me with concern, but he never said anything. Instead, he tried to keep me distracted by talking about anything and everything as we sat there getting lathered in hair spray, gel, and makeup. Occasionally, he would reach over and give my arm or hand a reassuring squeeze when he was able. 

Then, Lana and Alec walked in. They sat on the opposite side from us, thankfully, but we could easily still catch glimpses of each other in the mirrors. It wasn’t lost on me that Alec was keeping an eye on us when he was able. His gaze making me feel more tense by the minute, causing my chest to tighten and my breathing to pick up. 

I turned my chair facing away from the mirror, toward Dieter instead. Dieter’s wide-eyed reflection told me that he could see the panic setting in. Without warning, he turned his chair to face toward me, which resulted in a minor scolding from the girl working on his hair. He didn’t say anything, but I could see how concerned he was from the way his eyes were focused on me. 

I sat staring at the rise and fall of his chest, attempting to match his breathing. After a short time passed, I felt something pressing against my lower leg, just above the ankle. I glanced down and found Dieter’s outstretched leg against mine, grounding me to the here and now. It was unexpected and exactly what I needed. When I finally looked up and met his gaze, I realized my eyes were pooling with tears. He saw it too. 

He looked around, checking to see if anyone else had noticed. He cleared his throat, “Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask…do you mind if I list you as Zee’s secondary emergency contact on her paperwork? You’re the only other person she likes so far. You know, just in case I’m outta town or something?” 

His question took me by surprise, which I’m pretty sure was his intent. It also made me feel emotional in a different way. I knew he was putting a lot of trust in me for something like that. I sniffled. 

“Really? Does that make me like her godmother or something?” 

He shrugged, “Is that a thing for cats? I mean, I guess so…” 

The ladies working on our hair let out a chorus of “awwws” over his question. I gave him a genuine smile, thankful that he was here with me. He always knew what I needed. 

“Of course, anything for Zee.” I finally answered.

He returned my smile with one of his own. He almost looked…relieved? I wasn’t sure if it was from my answer or the fact that the distraction had worked. 

Another girl stepped in to start working on my makeup at that point, so Dieter had to move his leg away from mine. I found myself longing for his warmth the second it was gone. We did, however, stay facing each other. 

We soon found ourselves talking and joking with the ladies who were getting us ready, and I had completely forgotten about Alec and Lana on the other side of the room. Dieter kept the laughs going by giving suggestions on my hair and makeup. Most of it was said with the intention of being funny, but they did take him up on the suggestion to add a red rose accessory to the side of my hair that was pinned back. He went on to say that it would make my red lips and nails pop a little more, seemingly thrilled that they actually agreed with him. 

Time flew by after that, and we were finished in hair and makeup before we knew it. Dieter had refused to leave his seat until I was finished, and surprisingly they didn’t make a big deal out of it. I think they enjoyed his company just as much as I did. When we finally got up to leave, he followed closely behind me, somewhat blocking my view of Alec and Lana. I had a feeling his actions were intentional but couldn’t know for certain. 

Once we got into the hallway, I felt his fingers slide around my left hand, his thumb gently gliding back and forth over the engagement ring that I still wore on my finger. I noticed his brow furrow slightly before asking if I was ok. I nodded. He smiled before leaning in next to my ear and speaking in a low voice. 

“Just for the record, I think you look amazing in red.” 

I could feel the heat creeping up into my cheeks and a tingle between my thighs from his words. I gave him a shy smile just as we reached my dressing room door. My grip tightened on his hand, before pulling him into a hug. A real hug. Not one of those half-assed side hugs we did more often than not. I didn’t hesitate to bury my face in his neck, inhaling his scent as deeply as I could. 

“Thank you for keeping me together back there.” 

I felt his arms tighten around me, “You don't have to thank me for that. You know I’d do anything for you.” 

I pulled away and cupped his cheeks with both hands, letting my eyes roam over his face before I gave him a sad smile, “I know you would. Thank you just the same though.”

I felt his fingers twitch on my hips, suddenly making me aware of how this might appear to onlookers. I dropped my hands and stepped away, “I guess we better get changed for dress rehearsal.” 

He nodded, “Yeah, I’ll meet you back here so we can go together, OK?” 

I nodded. He seemed to sense that I didn’t want to be left wandering the halls alone. He could already read me better than Alec ever could. 

Minutes later, we had changed and were heading back to the ballroom. Quickly getting through our dress rehearsal with a few minor errors on my part. Having Alec lurking around was really starting to become a distraction. Knowing that I would soon have to dance with him was making me extremely anxious and I was having a hard time moving past it. I hoped once that was out of the way, I would be able to focus on our routine the way I needed to. 

After our dress rehearsal, Dieter walked me back to my dressing room so I could change into the group performance costume while he waited just outside the door. When I was ready, he escorted me back to the ballroom. He tried to keep the conversation light through it all. Even managing to make me laugh a few times. I had to appreciate his efforts, I’m not sure I would have made it through the day without him. 

Before I knew it, the professional dance cast was gathering on the dance floor to run through the opening performance. Dieter stayed nearby, casually sprawled out in a chair, watching. It did give me some comfort knowing he was there. 

As we were standing around the center of the floor, awaiting instructions from Emily, Alec approached me. I refused to look at him directly. For once he seemed nervous and unsure of himself as he worked up the courage to speak to me. 

“Kat, can we talk later? Please?” 

My eyes briefly cut toward him, “I have nothing to say to you.” 

He sighed, “Please. Just let me explain.” 

I could feel the rage bubbling inside of me. What could he possibly have to say that would explain his behavior? I turned to face him, my expression not hiding the anger I was feeling. 

“I don’t even want to be in your presence right now. You should consider yourself lucky that I’m not making a big deal out of having to dance with you today. So, just keep your damn mouth shut and let’s get our fucking job done.” 

His eyes widened, shocked that I was standing up to him in such a way. I could sense several cast members watching us, clearly having overheard me. It seemed to make Alec uncomfortable, probably because he couldn’t react how he normally would to my defiance. His only response was to nod and stand there quietly. He stayed that way until we started the routine. Surprisingly, he did drop the issue. The only communication between us was what the performance required. We managed to make it through without any issues. 

I walked off the dance floor without saying another word to him, feeling more relaxed and realizing that he no longer had any hold over me. This thing with him was finally over and I could let him go. He had to know there was no coming back from it and he couldn’t blame me for it either.

Dieter stood and moved to meet me at the edge of the dance floor with a questioning look on his face. I gave him a genuine smile now, looping my arm through his as I pulled him toward the exit, “Come on, let’s get our final fittings done.” 

The rest of the morning went by in a blur as we rushed to finish up with our final fittings and stop in for touch ups on hair and makeup. Before we knew it, we were in the staging area, waiting for the live show to begin. I managed to make it through the opening performance with Alec without any issue. He didn’t try to speak to me at all outside of what was necessary. It seemed he had finally listened to me for once. Afterwards, I rushed to change for my performance with Dieter. I was eager to be back with him, finding that his presence was like a comforting balm to my still raw emotions that threatened to break free at any moment. I was more than happy to be done with Alec, but there was still some residual hurt there too. There always would be since he had taken up such a large part of my life. However, Dieter seemed to make it a lot more bearable.

When I finally made my way back to Dieter, he gave me a brilliant smile before leaning in to tell me that I stole the show once again. I rolled my eyes at the compliment but was flattered by it just the same. We took a minute to take some quick pictures in costume to post on social media to make the bosses happy - both of us adding playful comments about each other just to make it more entertaining.

He stood there for a moment, staring at his phone before glancing in my direction.

“You know, those shorts should be illegal. I can’t believe they’re letting you dance in those.” 

I scoffed, “Excuse me? I’m pretty sure I’ve worn less clothing to dance in than this before.” 

He chuckled, still looking at his phone, “That may be true, but those little skirts don’t hug your ass like that.” 

My eyebrows disappeared into my hairline as I stared at him. His eyes widened, like he just realized he said that out loud. He slowly raised his head to meet my gaze and gave me a sheepish smile, his cheeks turning a little red. 

He shrugged, “I’m sorry. I’m a man. I’m gonna notice a nice ass. Especially when it’s shaking in front of me on the daily. Sue me.” 

I snorted at his openness. He had no shame. If only he knew all the parts of his body that caught my attention on the daily…

To break the tension, I pulled out my phone to get our weekly hype song ready. I handed Dieter one of the earbuds, he gave me a questioning look as he listened before bursting out laughing. 

“The Brian Setzer Orchestra? Really? I swear I never know what you're gonna pick…I love it.” 

I laughed, “Keeping with the theme of the week. Gotta get you in the Jive mindset.” 

We started moving to the beat of the music, getting into the right mindset for the high energy dance we were about to perform. Out of nowhere, a camera was suddenly being shoved in our faces reminding me about the behind the scenes filming they were starting this week. It sort of took away from the moment, but we smiled and waved. Luckily, they didn’t stick with us for long. Dieter and I both shared a look of annoyance as they moved to another area to film. I made a mental note to find us a place to hide for the following week. 

Minutes later, we made our way out onto the dance floor and took our places. The spotlight dropped down on Dieter, who was standing in the middle of the stage. He opened with some of his signature Elvis Presley hip wiggles to the audience’s delight. He soon joined me on the main floor where we shifted into our high energy swing style dance. Neither of us missed a beat as we made our way through the routine - rock stepping, kicking, and twirling with smiles. Dieter added to the theatrics by giving several lip curls as he continued to gyrate around the floor. We finally ended with a flourish, settling into our ending pose as the lights dimmed to darkness around us. 

The screaming and applause from the crowd was almost deafening as we made our way over to the interview area and awaited our scores. Dieter was his usual charming self as he answered questions about his struggles for the week. He shifted to praising me for my patience and ability to get him to where he needed to be for the competition, hugging me tightly into his side as he spoke. His occasional glances in my direction were causing all sorts of reactions from my body. Clearly the high energy atmosphere was only intensifying things for me because the only thing I could think about doing was getting him back to his dressing room to straddle his thick thighs and have my way with him.  

I was drawn from my thoughts just as the judges began to read off our scores, giving us three 9’s and one 10. We were inching closer and closer to a perfect score every week and I absolutely could not believe it. Especially since the judges tended to get more critical as the weeks went on. Dieter was beyond excited, lifting me off the floor with a spin as we briefly celebrated the results.   

We spent the rest of the show watching from the staging area. Again, our only real competition this week seemed to be Alec and Lana, which grated on my nerves. Everything in me was hoping they would fuck up and get voted off the show, so I didn’t have to look at them anymore. It didn’t look like that was happening anytime soon though. 

Dieter didn’t leave my side until we returned to our dressing rooms to change out of our costumes. When I opened the door to set the dry cleaning bag outside for pickup, Alec was there with his hand posed to knock on the door. 

The anger that I felt in that instant was beyond anything I could describe. I couldn’t believe he had the audacity to try and “explain” this situation to me after what I saw. I dropped the dry cleaning bag beside the door then crossed my arms over my chest, refusing to allow him to enter my dressing room. I didn’t want to be alone with him out of view of other people. 

“I believe I told you that I didn’t wanna speak to you.” 

He tried to crowd me so that I would move backward into the room, but I didn’t budge. 

I gave him a pointed look, “Whatever it is you have to say, you can say right here.” 

He scoffed, “We have no privacy here.”

I shrugged, “Well… I didn’t wanna hear what you had to say anyway.”

I moved to close the door, but he stopped it with his hand. 

I huffed, giving him a frustrated look. 

“Kat, come on. You can’t blame this all on me. You’ve been checked out for months. You’ve wanted nothing to do with me. What was I supposed to do?”

“I dunno, maybe try to earn my trust back? I’m sorry but worrying about who you’ve been fucking and if I’m gonna get an STD is kind of a mood killer in the bedroom.”

His eyes widened, anger flashing there briefly before he remembered where he was. 

I laughed sarcastically, “Did you really think this little talk was gonna work after what I walked in on? This wasn’t texting other people or chatting online, Alec. There is no talking your way out of it. You fucked up and it’s all on you. I told you this was your last chance, and it literally took you…what, all of three days to fuck up again? You didn’t even try. So, fuck your excuses. I’m done.” 

I moved to pull the ring off my finger. He looked like he was about to have a meltdown as I held it out to him. Something between hurt, defeat, and anger was swirling behind his eyes as he took it from me. I don’t think it ever occurred to him that this could be an outcome for his actions. 

His jaw ticked to the side, it seemed anger was winning. “This is because of Bravo, isn’t it?”

I shook my head, “Dieter doesn’t have a damn thing to do with this, so don’t even go there. You did this when you decided to fuck around with other people. YOU. No one else.” 

I sighed, realizing there were now a couple of people hanging around to be nosey. Fuck this. I don’t owe him a conversation. “Give me my house key and leave please.”

Alec shook his head, “I don’t have it on me.” He was such a fucking liar. His keys were half hanging out of his pants pocket. I rolled my eyes, reaching to grab them before he realized what was going on. I took my key off the ring then tossed the rest back at him before shutting the door in his face and locking it. 

I sank down in one of the plush chairs, letting relief wash over me now that that part was over with. I hoped he would let it go, but deep down, I knew he wouldn’t. I couldn’t have been happier that this was my last season on the show for this reason alone. It was probably also a good thing that I was going out of town for the week. At least it would give him some time to cool down. 

My phone chimed with a text from Dieter asking me to let him in. I drug myself up out of the chair to turn the lock and open the door. Dieter didn’t make a move to come in, instead he reached for my chin, tilting my head upward to meet his gaze before settling his hand on my shoulder.

“Are you OK? I overheard someone say you and Alec were arguing.” 

My eyes scanned the open dressing room doors behind him. It seemed like there were more people milling around than normal. Without a word, I pulled Dieter inside and shut the door behind us. I didn’t care what anyone thought about it. 

When Dieter turned to face me, I was fighting back tears. He pulled me against his chest into a tight hug. He hadn’t hesitated to come to me when he thought I might need him. I really didn’t deserve him. We stood there in silence for what seemed like an eternity before he finally spoke. 

“Can you please tell me if you’re OK? He didn’t do anything to you did he?”

I shook my head against his firm chest, “No…not physically anyway.” 

I could feel his body relax against mine as he hugged me just a little tighter, causing me to melt into his arms. He really did give the best hugs, completely enveloping me with his scent and warmth. Honestly, I couldn’t remember the last time I had felt safer or more content than in that moment. I never wanted to let him go. 

Our moment was broken by his cell chiming in his hand. He sighed, pulling away to look at it. He left his other hand resting at the nape of my neck.

“Our ride to the airport is here. You ready to go?” he asked. His fingers lightly threaded through my hair as he spoke. 

I nodded, moving away from him to collect my bags. He helped me get them into the hallway, then I followed him down to his dressing room so he could grab his. There were more than a few curious eyes on us as he emerged with his own suitcases. I was sure that our strange departure together would only add to the gossip in the days to come. 

We were silent during the ride to the airport, but that didn’t stop him from reaching between us for my left hand, settling his on top of it, squeezing in what was meant to be a comforting gesture. His thumb made a few passes across my knuckles before pausing. In my periphery, I could see his head turn toward me slightly as he glanced downward. A crease formed between his brows before he met my gaze. I could see his jaw tighten as his eyes danced around my face before he eventually turned to stare out the window. He rubbed his chin for a moment, then I felt his fingers move to entwin through the tops of mine. We stayed like that until we got to the airport. 

Of course there were paparazzi at the airport, shouting questions at us about the show and asking why we were traveling together. Dieter was quick to mention that we were traveling for work. That was really the only question either of us answered. I was in no mood for it and Dieter didn’t seem like he was either. 

By the time we got on the plane, we were dragging. It had been such a long day already and we still had to make it through the five hour flight and get to the hotel. We knew we were going to be running on fumes the next day after considering the three hour time loss in our schedule. So, we did try to sleep on the plane. After falling asleep on Dieter’s shoulder, I did manage to rest better than expected, but it wasn’t enough.

It was nearing 6 AM by the time we finally made it to our Soho hotel. Dieter and I stood leaning against the check-in desk waiting as they looked up our room reservations. We were pretty much dead on our feet by this point and hoping to get at least a few good hours of sleep in before we had to head over to Studio 8H for Dieter to start digging into his SNL duties. The lady behind the desk finally turned her attention back to us, sliding our room keys over along with some paperwork for Dieter to sign. 

The desk clerk smiled, before going into her spiel about the hotel amenities. Dieter waved her off, “I’m sorry, we’ve just gotten off a five hour flight. We really just wanna sleep right now.”

Her smile widened, “Totally understandable Mr. Bravo. So, you’ll be staying in the South Loft on the 16th floor. The elevators are just over there.” She paused, motioning with her hand. “Do you need help with your bags?” She asked. 

This woman’s full attention was on Dieter. Not that I blamed her, but damn. I was standing here too. I tapped on the countertop, “I’m sorry, but where will my room be?” I asked impatiently. 

Her smile faltered somewhat as she looked between us, “Well, you’re both in the South Loft.” I felt the color drain from my face before she even finished the sentence. I’m so fucked.

Next: Week 5 (Part 1)

A/N: Happy Friday my lovelies! I hope you enjoyed the latest installment. I'm sure you did given that Alec is now officially out of the picture. Please do share your feelings on his latest (major) fuck up. How do you feel about how Kat is handling things? She's kind of all over the place with it. We didn't get any of Dieter's POV in this chapter (because it was so fucking long... sorry), but we got a pretty big hint at the end when he realized things were about to change. What do you think was going through his head on that drive to the airport? What about his reaction? Also, now that he knows Alec is out of the picture, fully expect the menace to come out.

Stacia and Joe are of course up to their tricks. How much do you think they know about what's going on with their cast?

Speaking of the cast...WTF is up with Lana? Do you all hate her yet? How do you think she feels about Kat and what Alec did to her?

The next chapter(s) will be focused on Dieter and Kat in NYC preparing for the Rumba and SNL. Let's just say Kat wasn't wrong about the trip changing things between them. 😏

Below is your Jive video for this chapter. It was some nice inspo for Dieter's Elvis dance moves. 🤭

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[hopelesswrites]

Margaritas and Karaoke

Joseph Quinn x Fem!Reader

-Your date stands you up leaving you to spend a night out with the rowdy group of lads across the room.

-

The condensation from your glass dripped down your thumb as you aimlessly stroked the droplets off the drink you were nursing. You felt the familiar tightness in your throat as the bar filled up and your table stayed empty. It was on a whim, after so many bad dates and a few other no shows that dropped your spirits and left a sour taste in your mouth at the thought of dating, you decided to give one last guy a chance.

The night was cold and you regretted your choice of attire, opting to dress up rather than dress for the weather. You took another sip of your tall tequila orange, fighting off a cringe as the tequila soaked your taste buds, questioning to yourself whether it was worth finishing your drink before you make your depart and head home. The last couple times a date went this way you called a friend to come rescue you, the embarrassment of being stood up being too much to handle, but you felt far too defeated, more embarrassed about your friends knowing this was another dud than the strangers around you.

The concentration you had on the trail of one particular drop of condensation was suddenly disturbed by movement around you and the scrape of a chair. You looked up, the man in front of you paused, eyes wide, like a deer caught in headlights.

“I’m sorry, were you waiting for someone? I can find another chair.”

You couldn’t form words, you could barely form thoughts, too distraught by your own misfortune, and here you’re faced with another kick in the guts, some guy, just taking your dates chair for his table.

You must have been staring for too long because he began sliding the chair back, “Sorry, ill get another one”

“No its fine, I’m not waiting for anyone” You answer quietly, scared that speaking too loud would make you cry.

The man nodded before sliding the chair out again. You looked back down to your drink, ready to scull it and leave before the scraping stopped.

“Are you okay?” The man asked. You looked up at him again, his eyes were squinted as he looked at you hunched over your drink.

“I’m fine” You forced a smile, silently begging for this interaction to be over. The man stared at you a little longer before returning the chair and placing himself in it, elbows propped up on the table in front of you, offering you his full undivided attention.

“You were waiting for someone weren’t you?” The man in front of you ducked his head forcing eye contact, something that absolutely intimidated you.

“Yeah..” You answered looking anywhere but at the man seated with you, “But it doesn’t matter anymore, he’s not coming, you can have the chair”.

You saw the man shift from your peripheral and he moved around the table until he was standing beside you, hand outstretched.

“Come hang out with me and my mates? I can’t leave you here all alone”.

You looked at the hand and then back up to him. He was handsome, now that you had given yourself the chance to properly look, and he seemed nice, what could go wrong? You slowly take his hand, noting how soft his fingers were as they wrapped around yours and he pulled you out of your seat.

“I’m Joe by the way” He spoke quickly over his shoulder as he dragged you over to a table of rambunctious men. Once Joe had stopped you in front of the table all eyes were on you.

“We’ve got an addition to our party tonight lads” Joe spoke loudly, “This is..” Joe’s words drifted off as he motioned for you to introduced yourself, which you did shyly, still a bit shaken by the turn of events your night had taken.

All the boys cheered, taking your hand to shake and introducing themselves. You thought they all seemed to be friendly blokes, which eased your mind about hanging out with them for the night.

“We were watching the football then thought about going down to that karaoke place down the block, how does that sound?” Joe asked, pulling out a seat for you before going back to your original table for the chair he was trying to steal before, retuning with that and your drink.

“Karaoke bar has amazingly strong margaritas” One of the men said to you, you think his name was Wesley.

Something happened on the TV above you all and the table erupted in cheers, capturing Wesleys attention.

“So, Mystery Girl, why has Joseph here brought you over? Date stand you up?” One of Joes other friends asks once the football game got boring again. You freeze at the question, how pathetic would it be if you said yes, he was obviously joking. You felt movement under the table and the man winced out a curse before you could even answer, “Sorry” He mumbled turning back to the TV.

“They’re not the brightest bunch, you’ll have to excuse them for that” Joe said into your ear, but loud enough for the table to still hear, earning a couple offended looks from his mates.

“It’s okay, not going to pretend like I always drink alone at a pub on a Saturday night” You laughed, more to yourself, you still felt pretty shitty about the initial situation. You reminded yourself to unmatch with the guy before the night ended, happy to be rid of the whole thing.

“He was a loser, whoever he was” Joe said, bumping his shoulder with yours to grab your attention. “Don’t beat yourself up over it yeah?” He said this much softer, those big brown eyes of his burning through you. All you could do was nod, feeling completely insecure by his intense gaze, you wondered if he knew his eyes had that affect on people, because surely it was not just you.

“Couple shots will have you forgetting all about him” Wesley on your left interrupted.

At that all eyes landed on Joe expectantly. “My shout again then?” he groaned getting off his stool, fishing his wallet out of his pocket.

“We don’t even have to say anything, how convenient” One of the men you had forgotten the name of answered. The whole exchange felt like an inside joke you weren’t part of so you went back to your own drink, watered down by the melted ice.

When Joe returned he brought with him a tray holding 10 shots of a golden liquid, tequila, and the good kind you suspected by its colour.

“Right!” Joe yelled gaining everyone’s attention as he handed out the small glasses. “On the count of three, both down the hatch”

All the boys began to count, ‘1, 2, 3!’ A loud cheer erupted around the table as you tapped your first shot on the wood before joining them in the middle and up to your lips. The burn had tears pricking at your eyes but without time to adjust you were all picking up the second shot and repeating, this time with a little less enthusiasm. The second one went down smoother yet you screwed up your eyes to keep the tears from spilling.

A gentle hand rested between your shoulder blades, “Alright?” Joe asked voice smooth as honey, as if he hadn’t just swallowed the harshest liquor. his thumb softly stroked the exposed skin on your back causing an eruption of goosebumps you hoped he didn’t notice.

“Yeah good” You choked out earning an amused chuckle from the man.

“I say we give it ten then we try and make the walk to karaoke” One of Joes friends spoke up, everyone else mumbling back agreement.

Eventually you all stumbled out of the pub on your journey for karaoke. You were feeling light as a feather, the alcohol beginning to take its affect and the general atmosphere of Joe and his friends easing your nerves. Wesley and Joes other friend you now knew was James had taken lead, skipping up ahead. Joes third friend, David was quickly following them, leaving you and Joe, arms linked as you wobbled at a slower pace behind.

“What’s your go to Karaoke song?” Joe asked, pulling you over to the left to avoid walking through a puddle on the sidewalk.

You took a moment to think, “Don’t stop Believin’, Journey.”

Joe groaned in appreciation, “That’s a good one”.

His arm that was wrapped around your elbow let go and snaked around your waist, warm hand on your hip as he manoeuvred you around a group of men smoking.

“What’s yours?” You asked back, looking up to Joes face instead of where you were walking, he was guiding you anyway you didn’t need to see.

“Oh, definitely something ABBA” Joe replied instantly, a sure look on his face. You giggled at the image of him singing ABBA in a bar.

“I can tell you’re a Dancing Queen kind of guy” Joe scoffed, “Yeah, I own that shit”.

You continued walking, Joes friends almost out of sight now as you both slowly made your way down the street. The cold breeze bit at your skin and you cuddled up closer to the man holding you for warmth.

“Cold my Love?” Joe asked, shrugging off his jacket to give to you.

“Oh no, no, please don’t” You insisted but he only shook his head and forced it over your shoulders, rubbing your arms firmly to accentuate his point, he was a true gentleman. You wished the men you found on dating sites were anything like Joe. Gentle, kind, courteous, you bet Joe would actually turn up to dates he arranged with women, just the most basic of respect.

“What’s going on in that head?” Joe asked, noticing you had gone quiet. You only shrugged, not wanting to talk about the start of your night again, reliving your constant misfortune in the dating world.

Joe sighed “You know that guy is really missing out. He would have been so lucky to be out with you tonight, who skips out on meeting a beautiful, funny, kind woman like you!” Joe ranted on and on, hands flying out in front of you both in animation. “A bloody tosser would miss out on such a opportunity, that’s who.”

You felt butterflies erupt in your stomach and heart at Joes praise. You hadn’t known him for more than an hour but for some reason the compliments held gravity within you. The idea that he thought so highly of you already had heat rising up to your face.

“Oi!” Joes rant was interrupted. “You both going to get in the bar tonight or stand around and wait for the sun to rise?” David had called out. You looked around and notice you had arrived, and the rest of Joes party had joined the queue. You looked up to Joe, a sheepish expression on his face as he removed the arm he held securely around your waist and made his way into the line with the rest.

Once inside you all beelined to the bar for more drinks.

“Your turn again Joey” James said as you approached the bar. Joe only rolled his eyes before listing off everyone’s drink order, adding yours to it. You watched as he tapped his card to the machine and distributed the drinks out.

“You two go get us a booth while we go queue up some songs” David said while taking his drink.

You followed Joe to an empty booth, Joe gesturing for you to slide in before him.

“Why do they make you pay for drinks?” You were curious, it seemed like a joke to the other boys, but you noticed how unhappy Joe seemed about it.

Joe groaned at the mention of it. “I lost a bet, so the whole nights on me” Was all Joe said as he shuffled in close to you, his cologne engulfed you in the confines of the booth and had you almost salivating, he smelled delicious.

“And what was the bet?” You pressed on.

“That I would get recognised tonight, within five minutes of being at the pub a girl came up to me and asked for a picture” You were confused by what that meant, and you watched amusement wash over Joes face.

“You don’t know who I am do you?” He asked, a sly smirk on his face as you shook your head no.

“Good” Was all Joe said before the rest of the crew came back.

“I’m singing Aquas Barbie Girl, you lot have to film it alright!” David drunkenly yelled over the table as you all settled in to watch other patrons make an ass of themselves onstage.

The rest of the night consisted of the margaritas Wesley promised, singing and dancing, and a firm hand around your waist. Joes fingertips occasionally stroking up and down your rib cage, keeping a steady round of goosebumps to rise across your skin.

As the night began to slow down and Joes friends started discussing Ubers home, Joe leaned in, hot breath fanning over your neck.

“How about we leave these idiots to it, and we make our own way home?”

Butterflies erupted in your stomach at the proposition and a heat formed lower at the ideas running through your head. Was Joe taking you home?

Before you had the chance to respond, the man had grabbed your hand firmly and pulled you up and out of the booth, a protective grip once again made its way to your waist as Joe manoeuvred you around people and out the doors, not bothering to say goodbye to his friends.

“Would you like to come back to mine?” joe asked casually as he pulled you towards the street, phone in hand ready to order his own Uber. “No pressure to, id just love to spend some more time with you, without that lot” Joe said, head motioning to the bar you had come out of.

“Yeah, okay” You stuttered out, a new flood of shyness engulfing you. Joe was hot, so much hotter than the guy you had even planned to be out with tonight and that had you nervous. Insecurities had your mind telling you this should be literally any other girl going home with him, but you pushed them down as you looked up at the man, a warm smile on his face and a hint of something else in his eye.

Tonight was only just getting started it seemed.

[crazyunsexycool]

Unbreakable

Chapter 5

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count: 2.9K

Warnings: some fluff, some angst, nightmare, mentions of abuse, talks of implied sexual assault, Marvin being a good boy, Steve being his dreamy self (at least I think so),

A/N: These two are so cute together. 🥹

Series Masterlist

The compound was huge and mostly empty. You looked at it with awe as your taxi drove away. Marvin sat next to you but by the shuffling he was doing he wanted to explore. The glass walls only exposed the dark empty entrance but you didn’t dare just walk in. No, you’d stay just where you were until Steve came out. It apparently took a few minutes from wherever he was in the belly of the building but soon enough you saw his large silhouette through the glass. 

“Hey.” He says with a smile once he opens the door. “How was the drive up? I’m sorry I couldn’t pick you up but some briefings held me up.” 

“It’s ok. The drive wasn’t bad but the taxi driver had horrible taste in music.” 

He smiles as he grabs the gym bag you brought with you and holds the door open for you. It had been about a week since the first movie night. The next day he had been called out for a mission that lasted almost the full week. It didn’t help that there was also limited contact. But it did help you think about the relationship that was forming between the two of you. Was it just friendship or was there a hint of more? You wanted to say the latter but you were forcing yourself to not go there. 

“Nat’s very excited to meet you.” 

“Well I’m very excited to meet her too.” 

Today was the first day of your training on self defense. It was exciting but nerve wracking. 

“Would you like a tour first? I think Nat is finishing up on some paperwork.” 

“Ok.” You looked up and smiled at Steve. 

He led you through common rooms and the living quarters, empty labs, meeting rooms, the gun range and ended in the gym. The whole time the building was empty. Not a single soul other than you and Steve. And Marvin of course. 

“This is where we do— did our training.” 

“Every day?” 

“Yeah, we would partner up with different team members to make sure we could handle different fighting styles. We would practice different combat tactics with everyone’s abilities.” There was fondness and regret mixed in his words. His eyes were distant as if he were reliving memories that happened right in this very room. 

Across the room a door opens and in walks Nat. You maybe looked her up to see how intimidating she was and you were not disappointed. Marvin is practically vibrating next to you as Nat gets closer. There is an air of aloofness but her eyes betray her. She gives you a practiced smile as she stops before you.

“Nat this is Y/N, Y/N this is Nat.” 

“It’s nice to meet you.” 

“I could say the same thing.”

Marvin nudges Nat’s thigh and huffs until he gets attention. 

“And who is this handsome boy?”

“This is Marvin, he’s my service dog. You can pet him if you like.” 

Nat goes on one knee and Marvin nudges her chest until she is scratching behind his ears. You look up at Steve who has a sad expression on his face. After another minute of Nat and Marvin getting to know each other she stands back up. 

“So, Steve tells me you want to learn how to defend yourself.”

“Yes and I really appreciate both of you doing this. I know you’re probably really busy and it means a lot.” 

“Don’t worry about it. It’s good to have a few moves under your belt. Now, do you have any fighting experience at all?”

“Does swinging a frying pan count?” You grimace.

“Did you hit the intended target?”

You nod as you remember the day of the snap.

“Then it does. I want to show you a few very basic moves and go from there. That way I can see what we need to work on. It will probably take a few lessons, I hope that’s ok?” 

“Whatever you think works best. I am here to learn.” 

“Good, Steve is going to be our training dummy. He was kind enough to volunteer.” Nat smiles genuinely this time and you smile back. “Ok so I’m going to show you one move and then you’ll do it. That way I can see where you are and where to go from there.” 

You nod and move to sit at a bench Nat pointed to. With the help of Steve she starts showing you simple moves. Then you get up and practice the same moves over and over until you get them right. You’re beaming by the time the lesson is halfway through and you all take a break. It’s more for your sake than theirs. Steve takes Marvin for a walk and promises to bring back more water bottles. That leaves you and Nat alone and considering how thoughtful and careful she has been up to now, being under her scrutiny makes you cautious. 

“He likes you, you know.” Nat finally breaks her silence. Her statement leaves you unsure of how to respond. “You don’t have to like him like that. Steve is respectful and won’t ever push you to do something you don’t want but thank you for just being there for him. I haven’t seen him smile like he used to in a long time.” 

“H-how can you be sure it’s because of me? Maybe he just became my friend because of Marvin.” 

“He is a cute dog.” 

“The best boy.” 

Nat cracks a grin and leans back, propping herself on her elbows. Before you can pick up the conversation you both hear something happening outside. The wind had picked up and there was something mechanical whirling until it stopped. Everything went completely still and you looked over at Nat to find that she wasn’t worried at all. About a minute later Steve walks back in with Marvin in tow and two strangers. A rather odd pairing. It was a raccoon and a blue lady. Marvin trots happily to his spot next to you but you feel on edge. 

“Hey Romanoff.” The raccoon greets your new found friend. 

“Rocket, Nebula. How was the flight?” 

“It could have been worse.” The woman, Nebula you assumed, answered. “Who’s this?” 

“This is Y/N a friend.”

“Hi.” You squeak out with an awkward wave. 

Black eyes bore into yours and you feel like she’s reading your thoughts and maybe she is. After a few awkward seconds she finally looks bored and moves on. Both Nebula and Rocket excuse themselves to go freshen up. 

“So you guys work with a talking raccoon?”

They both nod as if a talking raccoon is the most normal thing in the world. 

“I’m very disappointed you never told me you know a raccoon that can talk.”

“How exactly was I supposed to work that into a conversation?”

“I don’t know.” You shrug. “Nat would have done it.”

“I really would have.”

Steve shakes his head but chuckles while you and Nat high five. 

“I think we’re done for today.”

“I should get going.” 

“Don’t. Stay and hang out with us.” Nat says. “You brought a change of clothes, right?” 

You nod. 

“Perfect, stay the night then. I’ll show you to one of the spare bedrooms.” 

She didn’t give you a choice but you still looked at Steve. He only smiled and gave you a nod. 

“I like her.” Nat said as she walked into the living room. “You two would be perfect together.” 

“I don’t know. I don’t think she’s looking for a relationship.” 

“Have you talked about it with her?” 

“No but I'm sure that after whatever happened to her she’s looking to stay as far away from relationships as possible.” 

“Well you won’t know until you talk about it. Don’t wait until it’s too late. I saw how you looked at each other.” 

“Fine, when the time is right I’ll sit down and talk to her.” 

“Talk to who?” Rocket walked in with Nebula following close behind. 

“It’s nothing. How was your mission?” 

Nebula and Rocket start telling them all of the details about their latest mission in deep space. They’re engrossed in the story so no one hears you walk toward the living room. 

“And then bam.” Rocket says and then yelps when Marvin barks. He turned around with a gun in his hand and pointed in your direction.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” 

“You didn’t scare me. Nothing scares me.” 

“What about that time that we-“ 

“Nope, not scared.” Rocket cuts Nebula off and even though she doesn’t seem like the type of person that smiles the essence of a smile graces her lips for a second. 

You smile as you take the open spot next to Steve on the couch and Marvin lays at your feet. 

“How about a movie?” Nat grabs a remote from the coffee table and puts something on. 

The night had been nice. Steve was glad that you’d stayed for an impromptu movie night. The longer he spent around you the more he could see a weight lift off your shoulders, a light come back to your eyes. It made him care for you more, to want and protect you from all the bad things that this world still had to offer. He laid in bed wondering if it would be too soon to ask you out on a proper date. Maybe he would talk about it with Nat first and get her opinion. Steve closed his eyes with the hope of getting some sleep before he drove you back to the city. 

Marvin’s bark pulls Steve out of the state of drowsiness he found himself in. Were you trying to take him outside and got lost? Steve gets up and before he opens the door to his room a blood curdling scream rips through the air. His feet move faster than his brain as he runs down the hall. Nat is there with a gun in hand ready to attack whoever is hurting you. Another scream, there’s begging for someone to stop hurting you and Steve is ready to rip whoever it is into pieces. 

“Friday, how many intruders are there?” Nat asks in a whisper.

“There are no intruders. Ms. Y/L/N seems to be having a nightmare.” 

Nat looks up at Steve and quietly asks him what to do. 

“You should go in first. I think she’ll feel safer with a woman.” 

Nat nods and hands him her gun. She opens the door as you yell again. Marvin is on the bed trying to wake you up as you struggle against the bed sheets that are now wrapped around you.

“Y/N, you’re ok. You’re safe.” Nat calls out softly. “I need you to wake up for me. Y/N you’re safe. We aren’t going to let anyone hurt you.” 

You wake up with a small gasp and tears rolling down your temples. 

“Can I come closer?” Nat asks from the foot of the bed. 

Through the soft moonlight filtered through the window she sees you nod. Nat moves around so that you can see her better.

“Can I untangle the bed sheets?”

You nod again and she makes quick work of it. 

“Steve is right outside, would you like him in here with you or do you prefer that I stay?” 

“Steve.” You whisper. 

He couldn’t help the warmth that spread through him with the knowledge that you felt safe with him. Nat walks out and nods towards the room before telling him that she would make you some tea. Standing in the doorway with just the moon as a light source he can see your tear stained cheeks and the look of fear still in your eyes as you sit up against the headboard. Marvin drapes himself over your lap in order to provide you with comfort. 

“What can I do for you Y/N?” Steve asks softly but you still startle at his voice. 

“Um… I- Could you-“

“It’s ok, take your time.” Steve says as he watches you struggle to give him an answer.

“Sit with me.” You say after a moment.

“I can do that.” 

Steve walks in and sits at the foot of the bed but for you that’s too far. You finally look up at him and he gives you a gentle, reassuring smile.

“Too far.” You mumble with a small pout. 

“Where should I sit then?” 

You answer by pulling back the covers and patting the spot next to you. Steve gets up and moves around the bed but doesn’t sit. 

“Are you sure you’re comfortable with me sitting here?” 

“Yes.” 

Steve nods and settles into the spot beside you. “Do you want to talk about it?” 

You look up at him just as Nat walks in with a cup of tea.

“This should help calm your nerves. If you need anything I’m just down the hallway.” 

“Thanks Nat.” You say as you grab the mug and take a sip. 

She smiles and walks out leaving you and Steve alone again. It’s alone for a few minutes. 

“It was more like a memory than a nightmare.” You start. “He was pinning me down by pressing his knee on my chest and I couldn’t breathe. Then he was ripping off my clothes-“ you choked a sob and Steve took your hand in his. 

Marvin lifted his head and licked away the tears. You pet his head until he settles back down and then you rest your head on Steve’s shoulder. 

“I hate feeling like I’ll never be free of his hold.” 

“I know you can’t see it right now but you’ve come a long way already.”

“It doesn’t feel like it.” You huff.

“Tell me something, before when he was around how many times a week were you able to go out and hang out with friends? Maybe go have dinner or a girls night? Or go hang out at a friend’s house?” 

“Never.” 

“If we would have met before everyone blipped, would we have been able to be friends?” 

“Absolutely not.” You shake your head. “He wouldn’t have allowed it.” 

“Yet here you are. You went out to lunch with your friend the other day. We had a movie night at your place. We’ve gone to the dog park and you’re even having a sleepover. 

So while you feel like he still has a hold on you, every time you do something he wouldn’t have liked you’re freeing yourself.” 

You sat there and thought about what he said. 

“He would have hated you.” 

“I think I can live with that.” Steve squeezes your hand. 

“Can I ask for a favor? You can say no.” 

“Anything.” 

“Could you stay here tonight?” 

“If you’re sure then yes.”

“I’m sure.” 

“Alright, let’s get comfortable.” He says and begins to shuffle around to lay back down.

The next morning Steve wakes up first. Marvin is huffing on his side of the bed wanting to be let out. Steve doesn’t want to move though because you’re comfortably asleep on his chest with his arm around you. He can’t help the smile he gets when he looks down at you sleeping soundly. He’ll make sure to commit this moment to memory so that he can draw it later. 

“You’re really warm.” You say in a sleepy voice. 

“Is that bad?”

“Absolutely not. It's the best, I’m always cold.”

“So you’re just using me for my body heat?” 

You giggle and press yourself into him more. “Yes, I am.” 

Marvin whines again and scratches at the door. 

“I have to take him out.” You say as you start to get up.

“I’ll take him for a run. Stay in bed or go find Nat.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to impose.” 

“I’m offering.”

“Thank you.” 

“It’s no problem.” Steve reluctantly gets up and takes Marvin with him while you lay back down. It’s the first time in years that you manage to have a smile on your face so early in the morning.

After having spent some more time with Nat and Nebula Steve drove you home. 

“You should take him running more often. He’s never this calm.” You say while looking at Marvin in the back seat. 

“Well I do run a lot. I probably tired him out.” 

Steve stops his car right in front of your building and gets out to open your door for you. Even though it’s a short walk to your front door he walks beside you with your bag in his hand. 

“I’m glad you came over yesterday. Hopefully we can do this again soon. Nat was already bugging me about bringing you back.”

“Nat’s great. We even made plans to go out sometime soon.” 

“Well I’m very proud of you.”

Steve beams and you can’t help but return the smile. 

“I’m proud of myself too. Thank you for everything Steve.” Unconsciously you throw your arms around his midsection and hug him right. 

His arms wrap around you and you feel him kiss the top of your head. You can’t help but sigh at the comforting gesture. 

“I’ll see you soon?” You ask hopefully.

“Of course, unless Nat decides to keep you for herself.” 

“Never,” you shake your head. “I’ll always have time for you.” 

“Good, I’ll make sure to use it all up then.” 

You take your bag from him and unlock the front door. With a final wave goodbye you and Marvin head up to your apartment. It’s the first time in a very long time that you’ve felt the heavy weight of guilt and anger and regret get lighter. You can’t help but think that Steve is right. With everything you go out and do you are freeing yourself from his hold on you.

 More importantly you’re starting to feel like yourself again. 

Ch. 6

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[lurkingshan]

La Pluie and the subversion of the faen fatale

Apparently me posting about La Pluie subverting major romance tropes is now a weekly occurrence, because this show just won’t quit! In this week’s episode, the show continued to give Nara a lot of time and care and generosity, and in doing so, came full circle on another major trope subversion: that of the faen fatale.

If you’ve read or watched any romance, you know the character type I am referring to: this is the ex-girlfriend who shows up to mess with our leads, insert herself into the love story as an obstacle, and generally cause drama and wreak havoc. In romance lit we generally refer to her as the femme fatale, and for the bl genre @absolutebl coined the term faen fatale, because they are endlessly clever. There are many many many examples of this character type in bl, but perhaps no better exemplar than Plern Pleng (my nemesis) from Together With Me. 

If you’ve seen Together With Me, you know how this is supposed to go. The faen fatale, traditionally, is not a nice person and does not have good intentions. She may be acting from a place of genuine hurt and dejection, but she is here to fuck shit up and cause chaos. She is cold and calculating and ruthless in her attempts to eliminate her competition and win her ex back. She is an archetype deeply steeped in misogyny, and part of the romance and bl genres’ long history of stories steeped in sexism, patriarchy, and heteronormative nonsense that they are only recently beginning to recover from. 

So La Pluie? This show that has been subverting romance tropes at every turn? Yeah, they had some things to say with their treatment of Nara, and boy did they deliver in this episode.

Even before this week, Nara has already been set up to be a sympathetic character. She and Patts had a very good relationship. They loved each other, and they were happy. She broke up with Patts after he formed a rain connection with another hearing loss sufferer, because even though Patts and Tai never actually spoke, and even though Patts told her he was committed to her, she just couldn’t handle him having that kind of connection with someone else, and felt it was inevitable that it would come between them. She ended things with Patts to protect herself. And ultimately, she regretted it. 

As she comes back into the story, she is quite straightforward with Patts (and with Tai before she realizes who he is) about her intentions: she regrets breaking up with Patts and wants to get back together. We also see that she had reason to hope, due to a night where Patts drunkenly kissed her shortly before he met Tai. There are no tricks or schemes here - she tells Patts and anyone else who asks straight out what she wants. In her conversation with Tai when they first meet in episode 7, it is established that Tai likes her and wishes her well, a clear signal to the audience that even as she is interfering, she is not meant to be read as a villain. When Patts finally tells her he has met his soulmate and can’t be with her anymore, he does it with gentleness and care, because Nara has done nothing wrong and deserves only kindness from him. And once she realizes who Tai is, Nara backs off from Patts immediately, apologizes and confirms that she is giving up on him, and helps them all find Tai.

That was already great stuff! I felt so warmly toward Nara at the end of episode 8, and I expected that was where the story would leave her.

But La Pluie had more to say! 

This week we get what is probably the best treatment of an ex-girlfriend character I have ever seen in any drama, not just in bl. Nara does not just conveniently disappear from the narrative now that she’s no longer an obstacle to the romance. She is still here, and her story still matters. So we get to see her go to Tai, apologize to him directly for the misunderstanding between them, and start gossiping and giggling with him about Patts (what did you whisper to him about, girl, inquiring minds want to know).

We get to see her receive care and sympathy from the rest of the group and have one final closure conversation with Patts, at Tai’s behest. We get to hear Patts say out loud that their relationship mattered to him, that he still loves and respects her, and that she doesn’t have to disappear from his life just because they can’t be together anymore, all while Tai looks on fondly. She is allowed to cry and express how hard this is for her even as she handles it with absolute grace, both with Patts and then again with Dream. We even get to see her bond with Dream and affirm that she is not going to lose the friends she made through her relationship with Patts (and that Dream in particular may become even more to her in the future, oh my).

I really just have to applaud La Pluie for dedicating story time to this. Every time we think they are about to go down a more traditional dramatic path they surprise us. I continue to be so pleased and impressed with how intentional they are in their dismantling of these classic tropes.

[artemivsa]

𝐀𝐔𝐑𝐎𝐑𝐀 (𝐃𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐘 𝐉𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐒 & 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐈𝐗) 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒 (𝐩𝐭. 𝟏). 

sentence starters taken from the first six tracks of daisy jones and the six’s album aurora (2023). change pronouns as you see fit. 

track 1: AURORA. 

❛ you found me in the flames. ❜

❛ you’re my morning sun. ❜

❛ when i was away, you called me from a fever dream. ❜

❛ i kind of think i wanna make it last forever. ❜

❛ i’m here, i won’t disappear again. ❜

❛ how soon can you come? ❜

❛ where did you turn when you reached out for my touch and i couldn’t give you much? ❜

❛ i was running from your life. ❜

❛ strung out on the lies, with my tongue out of my mind. ❜

❛ i kinda thought the night was gonna last forever. ❜

track 2: LET ME DOWN EASY. 

❛ you found me lost in a daydream feelin’ i’ve been awake too long. ❜

❛ my eyes are open while my heart keeps sinking deeper. ❜

❛ every lie’s true at the time, baby, that’s the thrill. ❜

❛ won’t you let me down easy, if you’re gonna let me down. ❜

❛ don't you go and tell me that you love me while you're leavin'. ❜

❛ i could see us waving from the distance, like a mirage on sand. ❜

❛ that could be us trading secrets no one else could understand. ❜

❛ i got you under my skin now. ❜

❛ why do you make it so hard? ❜

❛ don’t leave me broken and free. ❜

❛  won’t you tell me where you are? ❜

track 3: KILL YOU TO TRY. 

❛ i’ve been an angel all summer long, i swear i’ve done nothing wrong. ❜

❛ i want all of your tears to be gone, come along. ❜

❛ so close to get and so far away, come along. ❜

❛ could the words ever be unspoken? ❜

❛ could the truth ever untell those lies? ❜

❛ could a promise ever have been unbroken? ❜

❛ would it kill you to try? ❜

❛ since i found you, i can’t stop laughing. ❜

❛ i need you, baby, you’re my better half. ❜

❛ come back home. ❜

❛ what is it i must do for you? ❜

❛ call me back to bed to tell you a lullaby. ❜

❛ you got no damn right to be so damn heartbroken. ❜

❛ let me come home to you. ❜

❛ if i tell you, promise me you’re leaving. ❜

❛ show me, i’d blind myself to see it. ❜

track 4: TWO AGAINST THREE. 

❛ boys were invincible lovers, just begging to be destroyed. ❜

❛ i’m bathed and going back to bed. ❜

❛ this was never any cause for alarm. ❜

❛ it seems you have a choice to make. ❜

❛ all i need’s a promise i can keep to myself. ❜

❛ i know those mornings are as good as it ever can be. ❜

❛ feeling our hearts are beating tenderly, two against three. ❜

❛ i’m nowhere near you. ❜

track 5: LOOK AT US NOW (HONEYCOMB) 

❛ i don’t know who i am. ❜

❛ baby, do you know who you are? ❜

❛ is it out of our hands? ❜

❛ tell me how we made it this far. ❜

❛ did we unravel a long time ago? ❜

❛ is there too much we don’t wanna know? ❜

❛ i wish it was easy but it isn’t so. ❜

❛ we could make a good thing bad. ❜

❛ you’ve been crying in the dark. ❜

❛ how did we get here? how do we get out? ❜

❛ baby, look at us now. ❜

❛ this thing we’ve been doing ain’t working out, why can’t you just admit it to me? ❜

❛ we used to be something to see. ❜

track 6: REGRET ME. 

❛ you regret me and i’ll regret you. ❜

❛ except i don’t care what you feel. ❜

❛ so go ahead and regret me but i’m beating you to it, dude. ❜

❛ you couldn’t handle your liquor and you can’t seem to handle the truth. ❜

❛ i’m perfectly ready to strike. ❜

❛ i’ll do anything you please. ❜

❛ go ahead and regret me but i always will too. ❜

[alterchaos]

IN THE SHADOW OF DOUBT

After an entire month of searching, the girl with the golden hair remains missing. Sonic seeks answers from a source he can trust...

PREVIOUS CHAPTER: THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL

NEXT CHAPTER: ESCAPE: PRISON ISLAND

The billboard television buzzed on, revealing a woman in a newsroom.

“Good evening, Station Square. This is Scarlet Garcia reporting live from station SWA-08 regarding the disappearance of young Evelyn Thorndyke a little over a month ago.” Her picture appeared next to the reporter, “Joining me is her father, the famous Nelson Thorndyke, son of the well-loved philanthropist Charles ‘Chuck’ Thorndyke, whose corporation generously donated billions in the repair of our beloved city after the devastating flood just a couple months prior.” The camera panned to show a middle-aged man, worn and disheveled from countless nights without sleep, “How are you today, Mr. Thorndyke?”

“My daughter is still missing, Ms. Garcia…How well can a father in my position be?”

The reporter startled, having not expected such a blunt response, “R-Right…I can only imagine how frustrating the situation may seem given your tireless efforts to find her…”

No comment.

She decided to change the subject, “Mr. Thorndyke, we invited you onto our show today to address the growing concern among the public surrounding your…rather vocal decry of the Hero of Station Square. Do you really believe he was the one to kidnap your daughter and, if so, what would be his reason?”

Nelson’s eyes narrowed, “The facts of the attack are clear. She was harmed and taken by a ‘super-speed hedgehog’ who ran from the law when confronted. Does any of that sound innocent to you?”

“N-No but-”

The businessman began to rise, “Then allow me to say this.” He looked into the camera with vengeance, “Sonic the Hedgehog…I know you’re watching. I will not rest. I will not give up until you return my daughter and are brought to justice for your crimes. I will spare no expense until I see this through. You have my word on that.”

“Sir, what about the rumors surrounding your company’s involvement with-”

The hedgehog in question tuned out the rest of the broadcast, perched safely within the cover of a park tree. He couldn’t handle it, the weight of the various accusations alongside his own failure as a hero. That day in the school yard played in his mind yet again, his heart dropping with guilt.

Had he only arrived just a few minutes sooner…

He put a hand to his head, brushing his disheveled bangs back out of his tired eyes as he contemplated what to do next. This wasn’t the time for regrets, not when she could still be in serious danger.

He needed a plan.

He needed help.

Thankfully, he knew exactly where he could turn…

He hoped.

—----------------------------------------------------------

Sonic landed on a branch near a window, hidden from all by the foliage surrounding him thankfully, in part, due to the darkness of the night that had fallen. He peered inside, taking note of the trio of friends discussing something with much distress, the earlier interview pulled up on a monitor. Eventually, the fox broke away and made his way to a nearby computer, furiously searching for some kind of answer while the pink hedgehog and human boy continued talking. Sonic smiled tiredly, having missed his friends in the month he was away.

Hopefully, they would believe him.

If not…

Sonic took a deep and shaky breath, inching his way towards the window pane. He gently knocked on it with his knuckles.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Tails continued running his data search on the attic’s computer, though his ear twitched slightly at the noise. Amy, on the other hand, turned fully towards the window where Sonic was now waving sheepishly, offering a small yet nervous smile in tandem. She gasped, saying something muffled by the pane before the other two friends turned their heads to look, equally surprised. Tails nearly knocked the chair he’d been sitting in over as he scrambled to the window, opening it and staring at his brother.

“Tails…I…I-I didn’t-”

Tails threw his arms around his brother before he had a chance to finish.

“Like I would believe any of that! I’m just happy you’re okay, Sonic!”

Sonic watched with wide, watery eyes as his other two friends approached.

“Me neither! You didn’t do anything wrong! Chris told us what really happened.”

“I keep trying to tell my father but he won’t listen. Nobody will, given the facts of the case.”

“Tanaka believes us though. The only reason we weren’t arrested after questioning is because he swore to keep surveillance on us, which basically means we’re just stuck in the mansion until things blow over.”

“H-How are you holding up? Wh-Where did you even go? Why-!?”

The fox froze as the hedgehog slumped into his arms, a few tears rolling down his cheeks with each shaky breath as the weight of his anxiety and suffering hit him.

His friends…

They believed him…

They really believed him…

“Woah! Hey! I’ve got you…”

“Bring him inside!”

“He’s really warm…”

“I’ll get him some water and a snack!”

“Get him a blanket too!”

Chris nodded, disappearing down the stairs.

“I-I…I don’t know what to sa-”

“You don’t need to say anything! Just sit down and take a moment to rest. You look like you need it. Then we can talk.”

Sonic nodded, plopping down onto a nearby beanbag, quickly being overrun by his fatigue on the soft, pillowy surface.

Maybe…if he shut his eyes for just a moment…

Only…

a…

moment…

…

—----------------------------------------------------

It was still dark when the hedgehog stirred from his nap, now wrapped with care in the folds of a soft blanket. He slowly opened his eyes, focusing his vision on the trio chatting amongst themselves enthusiastically. Tails had seemingly found what he’d been searching for earlier, showing off a series of documents as well as charts to the other two. He paused, looking at his older brother with a smile as he noticed his awakened state.

“Hey sleepyhead. Feel better?”

“Y-Yeah…” Sonic sat up, holding his head slightly, “How long was I out?”

“A few hours.”

“Here.” Chris handed the groggy hedgehog a juice box and some crackers, “You look like you haven’t eaten in days.”

“...I haven’t.”

Everyone watched with concern as their despondent friend took the food. Clearly he’d been pushing himself too hard these past few weeks, no doubt to try and save their missing friend plastered over every news station.

Tails sat down next to his brother, offering a shoulder for him to lean on, “Where did you go this past month?”

Sonic tried to remain strong on his own but eventually gave in, leaning against his brother for support as he ate, “...Everywhere.”

“Everywhere?”

“I searched the entire planet for her…every inch…three times over…”

Amy gasped, “Three times over?”

Tails pushed further, “And?”

Sonic dropped his head in defeat, “Nothing. There was no sign of her.” He clenched the juice box in his hands, causing it to crinkle slightly beneath his frustrated grip.

“...Just as I suspected.”

“Huh?”

Sonic looked at his now-standing brother with wide eyes.

“A government satellite reentered orbit after being out of commission for the past 50 years.”

“Okaaay…How exactly does that help us?”

“Because it did so the exact day of Eve’s kidnapping.”

“-!!?!”

Sonic jolted onto his feet, nearly tripping over himself as he scrambled to the computer where his little brother had pulled up multiple news articles.

“Check this out! ‘Space Colony Ark reenters orbit after abandonment by G.U.N. 50 years prior.’ The station was said to be home to a deadly experiment known as ‘Project Shadow’ that killed everyone on board, the scientists as well as their families.”

“So?”

“I’m getting to that.” Tails shook his head playfully at his brother’s signature impatience, “The project was headed by G.U.N scientist, Gerald Robotnik, who is quoted to have taken up the position ‘in order to heal my beloved granddaughter of her incurable illness’.”

“That’s great and all, Tails, but what does this have to do with Eve?”

“Take a look at this…” Tails pulled up a picture on his screen of a blonde girl in a blue gown. Sonic’s eyes went wide.

She…

She looked exactly like…

“Eve!?”

“No, though I thought so at first too. This is Gerald Robotnik’s granddaughter. Her name was Maria…”

Chris stepped forward, arms crossed, “Which is exactly what that hedgehog kept calling my little sister as he…” He trailed off, unable to finish that statement.

“It’s a bit of a stretch, but I’m willing to bet that dark hedgehog Chris encountered is related to this ‘Project Shadow’. My guess is that he kidnapped Eve believing her to be this ‘Maria Robotnik’ girl from the colony.”

“And that’s exactly where we’ll find her then!” Sonic smiled.

Amy stepped forward, “But according to the published articles, everyone died right? So then…”

“Right. That leaves one question…” Tails’s expression fell gravely serious.

“...Who’s running this project now and why?”

Sonic raced towards the window, “Does that matter? We have our destination so let’s g-”

“I wouldn’t move if I were you.”

Sonic froze, an armored figure from outside aiming their gun at him. A large “G” decorated the front of their vest. Similarly dressed agents emerged from the attic door, surrounding the quartet of friends, all with guns pointed directly at them. A couple lunged forward, detaining Chris on the floor and out of the line of fire.

“HEY!! LET ME GO!!!”

“Stay down Chris.”

The disheveled S-Squad leader emerged into the attic alongside the agents, his older brother emerging alongside him.

“Dad!?”

The businessman ignored his son, approaching the cornered hedgehog with fury. With a snap of his finger, the hedgehog was restrained. He struggled against the agents in his tired state, ready for a fight until…

clack

Everyone paused as one of the agents held the barrel of his gun to the young boy’s head.

Chris’s eyes went wide.

“Hey! Wh-What are you-!!” The agents stepped in the way of the erratic racecar driver.

Nelson froze.

“Stand down, hedgehog. Your choice.”

Without hesitation, Sonic raised his arms, surrendering to the agents. He was cuffed and taken away without another word, his friends similarly taken into custody for intense questioning.

Nelson grabbed the commander’s arm as he began to leave.

“What was that?”

“We neutralized the threat, Mr. Thorndyke. That was why you hired us, is it not.”

“It is but-”

“Then you will do well to not interfere in the affairs of the government, Mr. Thorndyke.” He pulled his arm away, stopping one last time before the attic door, “Be sure to teach that lesson to your son if you know what’s good for him.”

And then he was gone.

“Well that got out of hand…”

The businessman clenched his fist.

“You really still believe he’s guilty?”

Nelson jolted slightly, not daring to look at his younger brother behind him, “...Don’t tell me you don’t. The facts of the case are clear, Sam.”

The racecar driver pointed an accusational finger at his older brother, “Whose facts!? Sure, she was kidnapped by a super-speed hedgehog, but who’s to say there isn’t another! Stranger things have happened since Sonic and his friends arrived on our world. Who’s to say this isn’t some kind of conspir-”

“You sound like my son.”

“Maybe your son has a point! Have you even bothered to listen to his side of the story!?”

“...He experienced a great deal of trauma that day. The doctors were clear in their assessment. He’ll do anything to justify his friend’s innocence even if it means living in some hysterical delusion.”

“Is he the one being hysterical for believing in someone who’s gone out of his way time and time again to save us, or is it the man who’s hired some wack-job government agency to prove his delusions true at any cost!?”

“...”

“Listen, Nelson…I followed along at first because I, too, was fueled by my anger and shock. Even so, I still just wanted to get to the bottom of things. I thought that if my team could capture Sonic, we could either get the truth out of him or work with him to find her quickly. It’s no secret that he cares about this family. Even you can’t deny that after what you saw here today.”

“You’re only saying that because you finally found a rival worth racing.”

Sam frowned, offering a hand on his brother’s shoulder as he tried one last time to break through to him, “Nelson…I know you’re desperate to bring her home, but maybe it’s time to accept that you don’t have all the answers and put your faith in those around you. We all want what’s best here.”

“...”

“Think about it.”

Sam headed for the attic door.

“Wait…where are you going?”

“With luck…” Sam turned his head, “...off to set things right.”

Nelson stared at his younger brother, frozen in place as he flashed a cocky grin.

“The question is…are you with me?”

The businessman hesitated.

“I-I…”

CHAPTER END

[writing-whump]

Rain, ruin, respite

Follows the events of Isaiah's poisoning. The moving in together arc. Isaiah recovers from the poison, Seline ponders the possibilities and Matthew breathes himself into a panic attack.

Slight emeto, angst, fluff.

***

If Seline thought that spending the night taking care of sick Isaiah and saving him from dying would lead to some new closeness between them, she was wrong.

It took a few days for Isaiah’s fever to break and for him to become coherent. But she knew immediately when he did by the sudden distance that grew between them. Like the flame snuffed out from his eyes, and a blank canvas covered his face. 

He was all sorrys and thank yous, constantly looking for ways to curl up the farthest from both of them as possible and his voice was so cold and devoid of emotions or so fake…she guessed he didn’t have the strength to muster up a convincing disguise. Which made her even sadder, cause it seemed like he didn’t know how to interact with them without one. 

“Can I go home today?” Isaiah asked with a tentative voice, as if trying not to test her patience. He had been asking that a lot lately. But she was adamant about him staying under her care till he could at least walk without shaking.

Seline took over his recovery completely, from monitoring his temperature, amount of sleep and water intake to cooking the light kinds of food that would gradually introduce his sensitive stomach to eating again. Chicken soups, cooked carrots and potatoes, no salt. Healing herbal teas and saline solutions. 

Matthew was another surprise. He became their private errand boy. Picked up Isaiah’s fresh clothes, did the groceries and she actually caught him doing her laundry in the morning, which was embarrassing as hell. But he seemed to want to stay over as long as Isaiah would, so she didn’t complain about the help.

The three of them had been huddled up together for the last three days. Not really sure what to make of the new situation, without actually voicing it out loud.

Isaiah was poisoned.

They had all targets on their backs, even before helping him. So this was even worse. If they didn’t become a pack, they would be in danger they couldn’t likely handle on their own. And Seline knew that was not an easy realization for either of them to accept. And Isaiah felt so guilty about the whole thing - about letting them save his life for god’s sake - that she didn’t have the heart to start the topic herself.

She crossed her hands on her chest, leaning on the wall opposite the table.

Isaiah sat behind it, leaning over the freshly cooked and steaming soup, dark green eyes occasionally flickering to her.

Matthew was sprawled on the couch reading a newspaper he picked up in front of the post. He was reading it upside down, so she doubted his investment. 

“Seriously, Seline. I’m grateful beyond words for your help and care, but this is entirely unnecessary-”

Her patience likely didn’t have much room to be tested to begin with. 

“You will not,” she hissed at him, stepping closer, “spit on our effort to keep you alive, alright? You are in danger. We knew that and still took the risk. We already chose.”

“Yes! And by staying, I’m making it worse for you.”

“It can hardly be any worse.”

Isaiah winced at that and she regretted her words immediately. She heard the rustling of paper as Matthew put the news down. 

Isaiah glared at the soup sullenly and took a few spoons before grumbling. “Then maybe we should just move in together.” 

Seline shook her head and leaned back against the wall. She felt too antsy to actually sit down and relax, when the fight seemed far from over. “Yeah, like that was an option”

Isaiah looked up at her with furrowed eyebrows. “Why wouldn’t it be?”

Seline scoffed at him. “You just came up with that! You can’t be serious.”

“It’s a spontaneous idea, yes,” Isaiah nodded solemnly. “But that doesn’t make it worthless. Think about it. You would have access to unlimited magic through contact with wolves. Me and Matthew would have an apartment with witch protections. We could all synch our schedules so that you wouldn’t have to go alone anywhere. And each one of us would have people at home that would be suspicious if someone doesn’t show up. That makes a lot of difference to random attackers. Or to organized ones.” 

The tension filled the room like a heavy smell of hyacinths. Full and intense it made her eyes water. She noted Matthew shifting uneasily on the couch from the corner of her eye.

There goes the hard part. 

Seline swallowed. “I have a life, you know? I can’t just-”

“You wouldn’t be giving up your life. This is a way to preserve it," Isaiah said.

“You are serious?” Seline checked.

“Yes. I realize it’s my fault, so we can move to mine. Or I’ll get us a new one. I will pay you back, you know? They are not scared of me for nothing. I have resources.”

Like perfect control, a powerful shadow, rich parents, a well-paying internship for a psychological research agency for the government, a well-respected diplomatic position among the packs and contacts all over the city? Seline had to admit that wasn’t little. 

Seline looked at Matthew. A long look in which she hoped to ask a lot of things. What do you think? Will you accept? Do you believe him? Do you like the idea?

Matthew shrugged and looked away. “Fine by me.” 

Seline pressed her lips into a tight line. “Give me some time to think this over,” she said quietly into the wall. 

“Of course,” Isaiah said, returning to his soup with a grievous expression. “Same for you, Matt. Take some time and think about it”

“What is there to think about?” Matthew said gruffly and stood up, shoving his hands deep into his pockets. “I’ll go take a walk.” 

Seline wondered if that meant it affected him too much or not at all. 

***

Isaiah did give her space. 

She spent the rest of the day on the balcony, huddled up in a blanket.

First, she went through the rational reasons - a steady source of magic, protection for her. Matthew had been hanging out a lot around her place anyway, so she was pretty used to his presence.

Isaiah was…evasive, mysterious, distant? But also reliable and she could tell he cared. He cared about her even though he didn’t have a pack to invite her to, which gave her comfort.

It felt like he talked for her and not for what she could do for him, like he was seeing her - Seline the cultural scientist, the passionate student, the writer behind the songs, the one studying writing theory, the one tutoring younger students and giving her own classes as university assistant - not just the witch. 

Then she examined it from an emotional perspective. 

She loved that the city offered her the asisstant job alongside her studies. That she could help with writing, the thing she loved. Plus commuting for 10 years prior had been enough, she liked the location, the independency, the feeling like she could make it on her own.

Seline was lonely.

That’s why she waited so long. To enjoy her parents, her family. Because of the close relationship with her mother and grandfather and dad and brother. Because despite being an introvert and writer in need of space and alone time, she loved the noises made in the living room. The smells coming from the kitchen, the sympathy when someone got sick, the reassurance someone would come for her if it rained. 

Honestly she didn’t expect the packs to be such a problem. But they were much more forceful in the city about having your place among them than when she lived at home. 

Isaiah was her only ally here. He was civil, respectful and impressive - not just for a wolf, but for a guy.

And she yearned for that freedom. From watching your mouth, from being subdued and nice and hiding your mood, because your little brother had a wolf temper to go with his teenage hormones.

She was tired of her dad raising his voice whenever he felt a bit emotional and it being okay, cause wolf stuff. The perfect excuse.

It felt like she couldn’t express her anger at all, like her dissatisfaction didn’t matter, cause her role was predefined. Witches compensate for the wolf temper. They are the light to the shadow, the water to their hellfire, the song to their growls. 

It’s all about them and the witches take it, cause they love their magic. How could you not love the magic, once you tasted it? Commanding air with your voice? The droplets of water twisting around your fingertips like a ribbon?

They would pay the price and be happy about it. Just like you didn’t mouth off a boss or tell the professor her sense of organization sucks or tell the group project people to just not do anything, cause you would do it better yourself. And the more she felt pressed down, the more things she noticed, the more sensitive she became. Injustice, ignorance, stupidity, laziness. Not changing your course for fear of losing the effort put in until then, even though it was wrong. 

It drove her crazy to see the mistakes and all the reasons why people wouldn’t correct them. 

So maybe Isaiah was right. Exactly right. She wanted what she felt like she couldn’t have.

And he handed it over, without asking, like it was natural, like he didn’t need a reason to forgive her. To have emotions, to protest, to stand up for herself. 

With Matthew, it was different. He had to get used to her anger, to her expressing herself and standing behind doing so. No apologies, no submission, not making it easier on your precious violent wolf temper. If he expected concessions for having a big shadow, he wouldn’t get them from her. 

So yes, maybe she was more provocative and straightforward than she needed to be. She liked it. She liked seeing the reactions of people, what they did when she challenged their expectations, when she cared about herself first. Let them call her selfish, she was happier. Comfortable.

But Matthew did come to accept how she was. Despite the anger and complaints and the banter, he did and she felt seen too. It wasn’t just cause of the guaranteed niceness he came for, when she wasn’t being nice. 

Could she imagine living with them both, though?

“Care for some tea?” Isaiah interrupted her thoughts, joining her on the balcony with a tray. Black tea with milk and sugar cubes, just like she liked it. He was so attentive about such details, she didn’t know how he did it.

Isaiah sat down beside her in the chair. He looked pale and gaunt, coat neatly buttoned up to the chin. When he didn’t comb his hair back, all slick and smooth, he had bangs hanging on the sides reaching under his eyes. There was a slight wave to them she found endearing. 

She watched him from the side as he drank his cup of tea - without milk or sugar, just as she instructed.

Not looking at her, not pressing her for answers, but offering an ear if she had any to discuss. 

“I would like to sleep on it,” she warned.

Isaiah’s green eyes immediately snapped to her. They were a pure sea green in the sunset light coming through the cloudy sky. 

“And I have conditions. If we do this and Matthew agrees, we would all rent a place together. I’m not letting you or anyone else pay for me. We will all put the same amount in that new place. I want my own room and bathroom if possible. Also, if you expect household services, I will disappoint you, cause I’m a pretty bad cook…”

Isaiah waved it away with a wide smile, eyebrows raising. “I wouldn’t expect something like that. Am I allowed to use my contacts at least to find us a place with a good location?” 

Seline scoffed at him. “You may.” 

He grinned at her. 

She bit her lip, wondering how to address the last thing that made her antsy about the situation. 

Isaiah studied her face. “Would you be open to the idea, even if it wasn’t for the safety reasons?” 

Yep, that one. 

Because she realized during her pondering that maybe she would be. Because they have somehow become the two closest people in this overwhelming big city of strangers. Because living alone wasn’t quite as cut out for her. 

Seline looked away with a slight lift of the corner of her mouth. 

Isaiah chuckled and looked ahead at the sunset with the happiest expression she had seen in the last few days. He looked so relaxed and unguarded like this, with wavy hair, sparkly eyes, showing genuine contentment over something. It was a new side of him. 

Made her wonder about all the other sides there were to Isaiah Wolfson.

***

Matthew wandered the streets through the rain. It was nice, cause no one interrupted him. No crowds in bad weather and every passerby was hurrying up, not paying him any attention.

He craved space. Open space of a field or the steepness of a high hill. Or healthy-looking thickness of trees in a forest. The buildings, the stoney streets smelling of gas and cars and sameness was opressing in moods like these.

Isaiah suggested living together so nonchalantly. Spur of the moment idea. Here is a solution: why not, take it.

As if he didn’t know how much he would change Matthew’s life.

He had been alone for the last 10 years, since he was 14. Before, he had a room alone, farthest from the center of the house. And then he lived in packs with big buildings, in sort of dorms.

Always alone.

Everyone keeping away from his temper, from his shadow, his anger with said shadow and those tempers. Frustration from training that didn’t help and unsympathetic looks as he struggled with it. 

You had to keep away from the walking ticking bomb, the fiery redhead with a crazy powerful shadow who couldn’t handle himself. No one would want to bunk with him, be a roommate. 

Affording his own place was a relief. Finally, he didn’t have to keep being rejected. 

There were hardly any regular people in his life. Provisory pack leaders. Professors at school. It got lost in the swarm of faces. 

And then Isaiah came, not deterred by his bad moods nor by his failings in training. Cheerful and carefree, always expecting the best, never complaining about the worst. With all his caring touches and encouraging back pats. They were a sign of dominance from a wolf or something reserved for close pack members. But Isaiah wasn’t afraid of him and he didn’t like rules and when he wasn’t currently pulling away, surprisingly affectionate. 

Introducing Seline, the temperamental witch. He liked her despite the irony of it. Never before was he worth a witch’s effort. They never wanted to waste any calming effects on a lost cause. He didn’t realize how much he missed it, how much he missed out on, until he couldn’t stop hanging out around her. Didn’t realize what it felt like to be welcome, when someone doesn’t expect you but won’t chase you away. 

He didn’t acknowledge the care, the favor they were doing him, cause if he did, there would be an ocean of feelings and loneliness to acknowledge in contrast. And he didn’t know how to deal with it. 

But now the dam was breaking. One flick of Isaiah’s hands, an innocent suggestion, one sentence, rocking his world. 

Seline needed to think it over. Ha. This was a gift, a gift that shouldn’t have been strange or mean so much. Except it did.

And now Matthew wandered the streets and couldn’t catch his breath. It came in rapid little gasps, with needly pain to his right side. Was breathing supposed to hurt? 

He pulled his shadow up, quick and carefully emotionless, to take away the injury. 

Nothing changed. 

Matthew leaned against the wall of a historical building of vanilla colour. Breathing felt like swallowing a bunch of metal splinters. 

Maybe he should go back. 

Matthew stumbled his way back, half by memory, half by scent. Forcing his body through the motions until he found the familiar entrance, the old elevator. 

When he dragged himself to the door, he couldn’t make himself open it. What was he going to do? Shout for help? Explain that for a mystical, not physically related reason, he couldn’t breathe by the mention of a dream he didn’t know he had forbidden himself to think about, getting fulfilled? 

Matthew slid down to the floor and pressed his back against the wall under the window in the hallway, legs stretched out in front of him. Tipping his head back, right hand pressing to his chest, he tried to force oxygen to the invisible obstruction. He felt panicky tears down his face. But it was going numb anyway.

By some miracle, though, Isaiah appeared in the doorway. Went to his knees by Matthew’s side immediately, hands gripping his shoulder. There was alarm and intensity on his pale face, still visibly thinner after the ordeal with the poison.

Matthew didn’t hear the words spoken, just that Isaiah’s mouth opened and closed. The frantic concern twisting his features somehow calmed him. 

Someone was worried. Isaiah was worried. Isaiah solved everything. It was okay. 

His throat eased up suddenly and he took a beautiful deep breath, before bursting into a coughing fit. His chest, throat and nose burned with exertion, but Isaiah’s hand on his arm felt steady and warm. He focused on the sensation, letting it ground him. 

The cough turned into gags, his stomach muscles painfully constricting. Isaiah leaned him forward as he heaved emptily over his side. That hurt, but when it was over, he could finally breathe easily. He was panting, enjoying the flow of air. Isaiah still held his shoulder in an iron grip and Matthew felt tired, like his head weighed a ton from all the oxygen. He leaned against Isaiah, who caught him against his side, arm circling around his back gingerly.

Matthew lost track of time, only focusing on his senses. The cold of the floor, the hardness of the wall against his back. Isaiah’s chest under his ear, rising and falling rhythmically. 

He didn’t remember when Seline found them. 

The world still felt numb and soundless, out of character. He only felt relief as she ushered them inside. 

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Pomegranate Ink: XXIV

Series Synopsis: Unable to heal but willing to fight, with a fiancé in Kyoto and a last name that looms over everything you do, you accept an offer to study at Tokyo Jujutsu Tech. What you did not know was that your salvation and your ruination alike would soon join you at the school, neatly wrapped in the form of a boy followed by death.

Chapter Synopsis: You must deal with the Zenins in order to be able to recommend your classmates for well-deserved promotions.

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Yuta Okkotsu × Female Reader

Chapter Word Count: 5.3k

Content Warnings: angst, misogyny, naoya zenin, forbidden relationships, canon-typical violence, character death, original characters included

A/N: you all know what the next chapter is 😔

“You really think they’re ready for that kind of designation?” Todo said. You and him were sitting across from one another in some cafe or another, each sipping on your own drinks. You nodded.

“Gojo agrees. He’s the one who mentioned it, actually, and of course he would never force me to give a recommendation if I didn’t believe it was earned, but in my opinion, those seven have definitely earned it,” you said.

“The Zenins will have something to say about it,” Todo said.

“Since when have either of us ever cared about what the Zenins say?” you said, arching a brow at him. Todo chuckled, taking a bite out of the pastry he had ordered and chewing contemplatively.

“That’s true,” he said. “Alright, then. I’ll trust your judgment as always. When should we go?”

“Later,” you said. “The thought of going to headquarters right now is giving me a migraine. Besides, I have some errands to run and things to do in the meanwhile; I just wanted to check in with you and make sure that you were on board with the idea.”

“What would you have done if I wasn’t?” Todo said.

“I don’t really know. Gojo couldn’t give his recommendation as he’s a teacher, and Yuta’s overseas, so he couldn’t, either. I suppose we might’ve had to pay Mei Mei or tried to convince Nanami, but I’m pretty sure Nanami regrets giving us his recommendation, so I doubt he’d do it again,” you said.

“What, does he think we’re weak or something?” Todo said, clearly fired up at the perceived insult. Immediately, you shook your head.

“No, not at all. He acknowledges our strength — it’s just that he feels bad putting so much responsibility on the shoulders of two children, or at least that’s the vibe I was getting,” you said.

“That does make a bit more sense, but he’s being optimistic if he thinks childhood excludes us from the reality of this world,” he said.

“It’s his viewpoint, so I won’t try to argue for or against it,” you said. “Worst case, we would’ve called Kaito.”

Todo made a face. “Good thing it didn’t come to that.”

Kaito Hinode was Tullia’s cousin, and the reason she had even come to Japan in the first place. Although he was definitely handsome, and talented enough as a sorcerer, those two qualities were about all he had going for him. He was widely known throughout jujutsu society for being air-headed and scatterbrained, and he was reckless to boot, always somehow ending up in your family’s manor getting healed. Though he would definitely give his recommendation if you asked, the higher ups usually did not take him very seriously despite allowing him to be a Grade 1 sorcerer — in fact, the only reason it had been alright that he had been one of the ones to recommend you and Todo was because the other was the levelheaded Nanami, who even the higher ups had a begrudging respect for.

“Exactly,” you said. “It’s for the best that you agreed to it, especially because now it won’t just seem like favoritism or Gojo and I just promoting the people we like for no reason.”

“I don’t think the higher ups would’ve thought that either way. Like it or not, recommending your friends for Grade 1 status puts them in more danger, and you aren’t the kind of person that would do that unless you were absolutely sure they could handle it. Maybe they wouldn’t put it past Gojo, but everyone knows how much you love your friends,” Todo said.

“That’s true enough,” you said.

“What errands are you running today, then?” Todo said. You drew up a mental list of the things you had to do before you responded, already annoyed just at the thought of some of them.

“First, I have to visit the Zenin clan,” you said.

“What? Why would you ever put yourself through that?” he said. You gave him a look.

“You know that they have to be made aware of Maki and Megumi getting promoted, right? It’s better if I go than you, so don’t worry. I’m used to how they operate, so I’ll make sure there isn’t an issue with it. It’ll be more like a formal notice than a request for permission,” you said. Todo frowned.

“Just be careful, and don’t hesitate to call me for help if you need it. I’m not really doing anything much today, so I’ll be there in a flash if I hear that they’re bothering you,” he said.

“Thanks, Todo. It shouldn’t be a problem; the Zenins know to tread carefully around me. Naoya’s suspension was only lifted recently, and they’re all aware of the fact that I have the Kamos, L/Ns, and Gojos on my side,” you said. “It wouldn’t be to their advantage to outright hurt me. Now, I’m sure they’ll argue about what I’m going to tell them, but that’s to be expected.”

“I always forget that my rival is a child of nepotism,” Todo said. “Or maybe it’s that I purposefully try to not think about it. It’s the most boring thing about you, you know.”

“I don’t know if calling an inherited technique ‘nepotism’ is exactly right, but you could look at it that way, sure,” you said. “Anyways, after dealing with the Zenins, I’m going to go get some new curtains for my room. I’m bored with the ones I have right now.”

“I’d offer to help with that, too, but I doubt you’d want my help with interior design,” Todo said. “Even if I am really skilled at it.”

“Right, I think I’m good, but thanks for the offer,” you said. You actually didn’t doubt that Todo had an eye for interior design, as he seemed like the type who would, but you had this sense that your tastes differed in some ways, so it’d probably be for the best if you left him behind this time.

“Since you have so much to do, you should probably get going, huh?” he said. “Like I told you, I’ll keep my phone on. The instant you call, I’ll be there.”

“Thank you, Todo,” you said. “I promise that if I need something while I’m at the Zenin manor, you’ll be the third person I reach out to.”

“The third?” he said, scandalized. You placed your hands on his shoulders.

“The first would obviously be Gojo, and the second would be Noritoshi, both of whom would be much better suited to dealing with clan politics than you. If they’re both busy, then I’ll be certain to ring you,” you said. He knocked your hands away with a huff.

“I see how it is,” he said.

“Don’t be too offended. I like you better for not being born a clan heir,” you said.

“Your attempts to save face are not working,” he said.

“Maybe I should leave before I shove my foot further into my mouth, then,” you said. “See you around. I'll text you to come pick me up when it’s time to go to headquarters.”

“See you then, Y/N,” he said.

The Zenin mansion was a technically beautiful building. You had to admit this much, even though you hated the clan and everything they stood for — they had the aesthetic of a wealthy family down. They were not as extravagant as the Gojos, who had everything in excess, but neither were they as traditional and austere as the Kamos, who adhered to the thoughts and practices of their forebears rather strictly. It was something in between, a kind of class that was borne from a mixture of opulence and convention.

The gate did not squeal at all when you opened it, stepping into the courtyard of the massive home. Soft pink flowers dusted from a towering tree, the petals dancing in the breeze and giving an ethereal quality to the atmosphere. Somewhere, someone was playing the piano, and it was the most beautiful song you had ever heard, a mournful tune that floated out through an open window and tangled with the blossoms as they fell.

“Y/N L/N,” a stern voice said. You blinked, breaking out of your daze and finding yourself face to face with a man you knew to be Ogi Zenin — as in, the father of your best friend, Maki. “What business do you have here?”

“I come as a courtesy to the Zenins. However, my business is with Naobito, not you,” you said. Ogi did not seem like he was inclined to believe you, crossing his arms.

“Naobito is the head of the Zenin clan. He does not have the time nor the will to deal with a L/N grunt like you,” he said.

“L/N grunt?” you repeated. “It’s ironic of you to call me that when I’m a Grade 1 sorcerer, and the girl who brought someone back to life. In fact, I’d actually argue that I’m exactly the sort of person that Naobito would want to deal with.”

“Whether you’ve done all of that or not is irrelevant. You’re still a nobody in your clan, and nobodies don’t have the status required to meet with clan heads,” he said, moving to close the door on your face. “Is that all?”

“Wait!” you said. If you didn’t get this audience with Naobito, then you wouldn’t be able to recommend Maki and Megumi. It was one of those ridiculous rules that was stopping the promotion you were trying so desperately to give, and maybe Ogi understood why you were there, maybe that was why he was behaving in this way, but you refused to back down. The Zenins had ruined Maki’s life enough already, and you would not let them continue on in such a manner. “The piano. Take me to the person who is playing the piano.”

“The piano? Are you certain?” Ogi said, and now he seemed apprehensive in a way he had not before.

“Yes,” you said. “I know this piece; it is a difficult one, and yet they play it flawlessly. I want to give them my compliments.”

Ogi furrowed his brow, but he exhaled heavily, beckoning you in and bidding you follow him. You did so at once, not wanting to squander the opportunity you had been given. It was your hope that whoever was playing the piano would be a bit more agreeable than Ogi and would at least take you to Naobito, who you could then argue with until he accepted your words.

“Don’t think that this will go how you want it to,” Ogi warned as you reached the room where the music was originating from. “I know what you’re planning, but it won’t work.”

“I’m not planning anything,” you said. “You can just think of me as a music lover.”

Ogi slid the door open. “Tell that to him.”

The song abruptly stopped, and your eyebrows shot up involuntarily when you saw who had been playing. He looked confused, standing up as if to reprimand whoever had interrupted him, but when he saw you standing beside Ogi, a sly smirk formed on his face, his fox-like eyes gleaming.

“Well, well, well,” Naoya said, crossing his arms. “To what do I owe the pleasure of the L/N girl paying a visit to my study?”

“She wanted to pay you her compliments for your musical skill,” Ogi said, clearly amused at your obvious horror. This was, quite literally, the absolutely worst way things could have gone. You had been planning on avoiding Naoya for the entire visit, but yet here you were, standing at the doorway of his study, with him as your only hope at getting to meet Naobito Zenin.

“Is that so?” Naoya said, curling his index finger at you. “Well, you can hardly praise me from there, can you? Come inside, little L/N. You can leave us, uncle. I’d like to hear these compliments alone.”

“Certainly,” Ogi said, shutting the door behind you with a finality as you stepped inside with all the mechanical jerkiness of a wind-up toy. Naoya sat back down on the stool, resting his elbows on his knees and his chin in his hands, peering up at you as if he were some kind of pillar of innocence.

“So, then? I’m excited. Did you really like my piano playing that much?” he said.

“You’re certainly better at piano than sorcery,” you said through gritted teeth. “Though that’s not really saying a lot.”

“You are so beautiful, and yet you say such crude things,” Naoya said, sighing and leaning back against the window. “It’s such a shame. I’d like you more if you kept your mouth shut more often.”

“I’m not exactly here to please you. I have to meet your father,” you said.

“And here I thought you were so fond of me for saving you after that snake curse almost killed you,” he said sardonically. “It’s not a surprise that you’re not here for me. I didn’t think you would be.”

All semblance of the gentler facade vanished without a trace, and he became the Naoya you were accustomed to — harsh, brash, arrogant, blunt, and rude. You scowled at him. He scowled back, though it was infuriatingly mocking instead of angry, like he found your irritation entertaining.

“You’re still proud of yourself for that?” you said.

“I consider it my greatest achievement,” he shot back. “I’ve thought about making that picture my home screen so I can be reminded of it every day.”

“You’re a freak,” you said.

“And you’re a girl,” he said.

“That’s not an insult, so I don’t know why you’ve framed it as one,” you said.

“The fact that you don’t realize it’s an insult only further proves your simplicity,” he said.

“Will you take me to meet your father or not?” you said. Naoya pretended to contemplate this, hemming and hawing like he hadn’t made a decision before you even asked the question.

“No,” he said. “After all, what’s in it for me? Unless you can offer me something worthwhile in exchange, that is, because if you can, then I’ll definitely oblige.”

“What do you want?” you said. For him to be making that kind of request suggested that he already had some kind of payment in mind, and furthermore, knowing Naoya, that payment wasn’t something you’d really want to give him.

“I want to marry you,” he said. “And no, it’s not because I like you, so don’t get the wrong idea in your head. On the whole, I think you’re far too stubborn and don’t accept your place in society, so you’d likely make a shitty wife, but at the end of the day, I want to be the next head of the Zenin clan, and for me to do that, to beat out the rest of my family for the title, I need something big by my side. Something like the backing of the L/Ns. Something like a wife who’s brought a man back to life.”

“Even if I would agree to that kind of an unfair exchange — which, by the way, I wouldn’t — who I marry isn’t up to me to decide. You must’ve forgotten, but I’m already engaged to Noritoshi, so I can’t just say yes to this kind of proposal and be done with the affair. I wouldn’t dare incur the wrath of the Kamos like that,” you said.

“The Zenins would protect you. You forget that the Kamos need the L/Ns in order to stay relevant, just like the L/Ns need the Kamos in order to elevate their status. You’re the key to it all, Y/N, the one who can shift the balance between the clans,” he said. It was the first time he had ever said your name. You hoped he would never say it again. Even if being referred to as the L/N girl was degrading, your name was your own, something that you were loath to share with someone like him.

“I’m not some kind of key,” you said. “I’m just an ordinary sorcerer. I don’t know why the clans are so invested in what I do or who I marry. Bringing someone back to life was a one-time thing, and even though I am so talented with Composition, it’s reliant on somebody else’s power, so I’d say it barely even counts. Besides, it’s not a guarantee that any children I have will inherit Dissection and Composition from me, so I don’t know why any of you think that that’s a certainty.”

“It’s not a certainty, but there’s definitely a high chance that they will,” Naoya said. “Look, those are my terms. Say you’ll marry me, and I’ll let you meet my father. It’s the only chance you’ll get to talk to him, so make a decision quickly and be done with it.”

“What do you think Gojo will say if he finds out about this?” you said. Mentioning Gojo’s name was a surefire way to get the clans off your back when they were irritating you too much — though they didn’t love him, they had to respect him, as he was the sole representative of the Gojo clan and also the strongest sorcerer of the time.

“He might not be pleased, but haven’t you noticed that despite being under his wing, you’re still engaged to Noritoshi? Do you think he’d do anything if that engagement was transferred to me, instead?” he said.

“Yes, because he knows I don’t like you,” you said. “Everyone knows it. You think the higher ups won’t be suspicious that you’re marrying a girl that got you suspended from sorcery? It won’t ensure your place as clan head. It’ll just make you look like an idiot.”

“Fine, then,” he said. “Don’t marry me. Do something else for me in return.”

“What?” you said, trying not to sound too eager. Almost anything was better than marriage to Naoya; though it was definitely a beneficial union for him, it was the opposite for you. If you had to marry someone in one of the Big Three clans, then you were perfectly happy with Noritoshi, who was content with letting you do as you pleased and actually treated you like an equal and friend instead of a servant.

“Come listen to me play the piano again someday,” he said. “And actually say something heartfelt about it when you do.”

You were sure that in the meantime, he’d try his very best to convince your parents to let you marry him instead of Noritoshi, citing this future meeting as proof that you liked him, too. But this was not a big deal for you — you’d protest vehemently if your parents tried to dissolve your engagement with Noritoshi, and if they went ahead with it regardless, then you really would run away to live with Gojo. Anyways, the L/Ns were a passive clan, so they likely wouldn’t go back on an agreement with the Kamos for fear of a retaliation that they could not handle.

“Sure,” you said. “You should probably practice a bit more if you want what I say to be kind, though.”

“You just want to have the last word,” Naoya observed. “I’m the best pianist in the Zenin clan.”

He was right, but you weren’t about to tell him that. Unfortunately, you had never heard someone play the piano with as much skill as him, so there wasn’t much to critique in that area, but you would rather die than say something nice to Naoya Zenin, so you didn’t mention that, either.

“Now that you’ve gotten your promise of payment, take me to your father,” you said. Naoya stood gamely, offering you his arm. You sneered at it in disgust, and he rolled his eyes before lowering it.

“I suppose that that would be expecting too much out of you. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll stay three steps behind me. I don’t know what the L/Ns have taught you, but in the Zenin household, that’s what’s customary for women, and you’re no exception,” he said.

You suppressed the urge to imitate his smarmy words and way of speaking, deciding that there was no point in it when you had already just barely convinced him to give you an audience with his father. Instead, you made sure to stomp your feet as you stayed the ‘customary three paces’ behind him, sounding quite a bit like a petulant child but having no other way to express your disdain for the arrangement.

“Here we are,” Naoya said. “I’ll see you soon, little L/N.”

“Not too soon,” you said, shouldering past him so that you could make your way into the room where Naobito Zenin was reclining, downing something alcoholic that spilled past the corners of his mouth and dripped onto the floor. The scent of his drink filled the room, and for an entire minute, you stood in front of him and waited for him to put it down and notice your presence.

“Who let you in here?” he said after a bit, using the back of his hand to wipe at his face and gazing up at you groggily, blinking slowly and squinting like the light from the window behind you was too harsh. “Huh? Y/N L/N? How’d you come in?”

“That’s not what you should be concerned with. Rather, it is the purpose of my visit that is of import. Have you guessed it yet?” you said. Naobito coughed. You did not flinch.

“You want to promote that girl,” he said.

“Maki,” you said. “That’s correct. Today, in the evening, I will be one of the two sorcerers giving her and Megumi their initial recommendations. The rules dictate that you be made aware of both.”

“Megumi Fushiguro, eh? That’s fine. He has the Ten Shadows, so it’s a wonder it took so long for him to get the recommendations in the first place,” Naobito said.

“You’re going to try and stop me from recommending Maki though, aren’t you?” you guessed.

“How’d you find another Grade 1 willing to recommend her? She’s not particularly strong, so why would she get promoted in the first place?” he said.

“You weren’t there for the most recent exchange event, so I’ll forgive you for your ignorance, but the truth is that Maki’s gone toe to toe with a special grade curse already. Even if she didn’t win, just being able to fight back against something of that magnitude is clear evidence that she’s deserving of the status,” you said.

“She doesn’t even have a cursed technique,” Naobito said. You exhaled, pinching the bridge of your nose to ward off your coming headache. This was why you hated dealing with the higher ups — they were the most ridiculously traditional people to ever exist on the face of the earth.

“I didn’t want to do this, but since you insist on being difficult, I’ll remind you: Maki is my best friend, and she is Satoru Gojo’s pupil. Consequently, she has the support of the L/Ns and the Gojos. Do you think that continuing to block her promotion will end up well for you? At the end of the day, no matter how self-sufficient the Zenins are, none of them can heal. You can isolate yourselves if you choose, but without the help of the L/Ns or Shoko Ieri, all of you will eventually die in the war against curses,” you said.

“And do you speak for the L/Ns, girl?” Naobito said. “They don’t even respect you. You think that some ‘administrative delay’ stopped them from coming during the exchange event? Don’t be ridiculous. The Kamo boy was injured, so there’s not a soul alive that would’ve stopped them from going to that school if they wanted to.”

“What?” you said, your blood going cold. Naobito wheezed out a laugh.

“You are naive, aren’t you? Your father was the one who said that the L/Ns wouldn’t come to help,” he said.

“Why would he do that?” you said. Naobito shrugged lazily, tossing the now empty pitcher at the wall. It shattered with a deafening crash, clay shards flying everywhere. To punctuate it, Naobito burped.

“I dunno. I’ve never understood the ways of you L/Ns. You’d have to ask him yourself,” he said.

“I don’t have the time to go to the manor just to talk to him,” you said. “I have things to do. Sorcerers to recommend.”

“You’re still going on about that?” Naobito said. “Fine. I give you my permission. Go ahead and recommend Maki. It’s not like you’ll be the one supervising her, anyways. I’ll ensure it’s only ever members of my clan that take her on the missions; see if she becomes a Grade 1 then!”

“She’ll prove you wrong,” you said. “Do you understand that? She’s stronger than you realize. She’ll become a Grade 1 sorcerer in spite of what you’re doing here.”

“You both make a foolish pair,” he said. “Two girls that think they can face the clans and win.”

“Maybe I’ll never be anything more than a puppet,” you allowed. “But not her. She’s the one who will break free from all of this. She’s the one who will take you down.”

“Maki Zenin has all the strength of a flyhead,” Naobito said.

“Then I wonder how weak that must make you,” you said with a bow. “Good day, sir. Thank you for your compliance. I will report to the higher ups at once.”

Todo pulled up to the department store you were shopping for curtains at in good time. He took your bags from you and put them in the trunk, and then he opened the door to the passenger seat before ensuring you were buckled up and your phone was connected to the Bluetooth radio so you could play music. Only then did he begin to drive towards the jujutsu headquarters, singing along to whatever songs you put on in his surprisingly melodic voice.

“By the way, Todo, are you really sure you’re okay with this?” you said. He paused mid-high-note, giving you a confused look.

“Of course I am! I want my brother to get the recognition he deserves,” he said. “And it’ll be fun to accompany him on his missions. Getting the chance to watch him continue to learn and improve, taking part in the improvement…it’ll be a rush for sure!”

“Huh? Wait, Todo, don’t you remember—”

“I know what you’re going to say,” he said, cutting you off. “There’s a chance I might not be the one who’s assigned as his supervisor. Well, let me tell you something here and now: Yuji Itadori and I are meant to be together! He is more than just my best friend, he is my brother, and that’s a bond you’ll never understand. Us being together on our missions…why, it’s just destiny!”

“Um, actually, it’s not. Like I was saying, don’t you remember that recommenders can’t also be supervisors? That’s why Nanami and Kaito weren’t able to supervise us on our missions, and why Naoya had to step in at one point — due to the lack of Grade 1 sorcerers as a whole. We won’t be able to accompany any of them on missions, at least not on ones directly related to their promotions,” you said.

Todo slammed on the brakes, which prompted several honks from the cars behind him that had obviously not been expecting the abrupt stop.

“What?”

Walking through jujutsu headquarters with Todo beside you reminded you of the summertime, of the many missions you had had to take in order to reach full Grade 1 status. It was nostalgic in a way, and then as you walked towards the main office, you remembered what it had been like when Nanami and Kaito had given you their recommendations. Elbowing Todo, who was still grieving the news that he couldn’t supervise Itadori, you grinned up at him.

“Can you believe it? Not so long ago, we were the ones getting recommended,” you said.

“The start of our rivalry, huh? Well, I guess that was the exchange event, but I’d argue that being recommended at the same time cemented it,” he said, cheering up slightly. You weren’t sure if the setting sun was making the memories softer, but for some reason, you felt particularly fond at the moment, thinking back to those times.

“Now we’re the ones giving recommendations,” you said. “It’s crazy how far we’ve come. It’s only been about a year or so since I even became a sorcerer, and now I’m a Grade 1. You know, before joining the school, I was really unhappy.”

“You were?” he said.

“Of course I was. I was considered the failure of my clan, a girl who couldn’t even heal a papercut. I spent my time locked away in my room, told that the only thing I could ever amount to was a dutiful wife for a clan head. But what kind of an existence is that? Becoming a sorcerer was the first time I did something for myself. I took control of my life, and look at where that’s landed me! I can use Composition now, I’ve even revived someone with it, and I’m a first class sorcerer, as well,” you said. “I didn’t realize how wonderful it could be to be my own person, but now I’m so glad I got that chance.”

“I’m glad, too,” Todo said. “After all, I’d never be as strong as I am now without your advice and our rivalry to push me forwards!”

“You know what? I don’t even want to know what you mean when you refer to the advice I give you. I think I’ll never understand it, but I’m fine with that,” you said, finally giving up for good on trying to comprehend Todo’s method. “Let’s go and deal with some dusty old men now, shall we?”

“After you,” he said, opening the door and motioning for you to enter. Once, you would’ve been apprehensive, but now you walked in with confidence, your chin held high and your back straight, your strides even and measured. You were meant to be there. You weren’t an imposter. You were deserving of your place in this society.

“Y/N L/N and Aoi Todo,” Principal Gakuganji said. “The two of you understand better than anyone what it means to be Grade 1 sorcerers. Yet you still believe you should go ahead with this?”

“Yes,” Todo said from beside you, no longer his goofy self but every bit the proud and strong sorcerer that one would expect someone of his appointment to be. “We believe we should.”

“The Zenins will never allow her to be promoted,” Principal Gakuganji said. You smiled politely at him, though your every word had daggers behind it when you spoke.

“I already received permission from Naobito Zenin, so that’s not a problem. They’re fine with us giving her and Megumi our recommendations,” you said. “You can’t argue with this, sir. You saw them at the event, and you heard about their performances against the special grade curse that hijacked the team challenge. All of them deserve the promotion.”

“Grade 1 sorcerers are top of the line. They are the peak of sorcery, bar the special grades of course. You understand that?” Principal Gakuganji stressed. You and Todo exchanged looks before nodding. “They are meant to be the leaders amongst other sorcerers. Think over that carefully, and then repeat what you just said to me.”

“There’s no need to think about it,” you said.

“Absolutely none,” Todo agreed.

“Maki Zenin,” you began. “Elakshi Sakhare. Tullia Ferraro. Panda.”

“Nobara Kugisaki. Megumi Fushiguro,” Todo added, “and my brother, Itadori Yuji.”

“These are the seven that I, by my name as Y/N L/N —”

“And I, by my name as Aoi Todo —”

“Recommend for grade 1 sorcerer status.”

[basicallyahedgehog]

This Time

The wonderful, amazing, incomparable @phoebe-delia celebrated her 2nd fandomversary this week. It's also recently been a year since I fully crashed into her DMs and then just never left, and she's also been kicking absolute ass in her non-fandom life too and I just super proud of her.

So I found this fic that has been languishing in my docs for way too long, dusted it off and finished it, and Pheebs, I present to you the completed "Fic to Wreck Phoebe." It has 8th year party games, boys being idiots, non-linear narrative, break-up and make-up, and is inspired by a Glee song, because I just had to. (One of our earliest conversations involved glee gifs, this was a given).

I love you so so so much, this little thing doesn't even come close to communicating that. But I hope you enjoy this little thing.

Read Below, or on AO3

He walked through the corridors, fingers running along the stone walls, eyes bright and heart heavy. So much had happened here, so long ago. 

Ghosts of his past self were around every corner, young and bright-eyed, older and world-weary. Laughing with his friends, racing off on adventures, snogging in dark alcoves. 

In his mind’s eye he saw the bright flash of his alcove-mate’s hair. He didn’t need a ghost to remind him of that face, those eyes, the tiny smile that hid in the corner of his smirk.

It hurt more knowing he was here, in this building, unaware that he was being thought of. 

Harry shook his head and pushed through the heartache. He only had himself to blame. 

The eighth year common room was loud and warm, the crackling heat of the fire a comforting addition to the noise and press of bodies against each other, vying for attention. They were all pleasantly tipsy, draped across armchairs or sprawled on the floor, watching the bottle to see where it landed. 

A cheer went up when it finally landed on Harry. He had somehow avoided it all night, but his luck seemed to have run out. 

“Truth,” he yelled, much to Seamus’ chagrin. They had been playing this for too long for Harry to trust his body to any of his friends’ dares. 

It was Ginny who got in first, her quidditch-captain’s voice ringing out across the room. “Who is the prettiest person in the school?”

Harry smirked. “Gin, you’re my ride or die, but we all know that the prettiest person is…” He trailed off purposely, teasing his friends by keeping them in suspense. In the light of day he could barely get a word through the permanent lump in his throat. But in the dim common room, his head buzzing with cheap alcohol, he could say anything. 

“Malfoy.”

He let himself wander, switching off his mind and allowing his feet to take him all over the castle. In only a few short weeks the school would be overrun with teenagers, but right now the halls were eerily silent. 

When he finally took in his surroundings, he almost regretted his aimless wandering. Taking in the door in front of him, he stopped himself just before he could reach for the handle. 

If he asked for a safe space, would it be the same? Would he walk into the cozy little room they had spent so many hours in, or had he lost that right when he had left?

“Never have I ever kissed a boy!”

Harry leaned further into the sofa cushions, letting the silly atmosphere wash over him. He was probably the most sober one in the room — although more emphasis should be given to the most than the sober. 

He took a sip of his drink, mind casting back to dark alleys and hazy clubs. He ignored the ache in his chest, the little voice in his head that insisted that he should have waited for a boy, not just the first bloke he’d seen that night in Muggle London. 

He scanned the room, attempting to shake off his thoughts. He watched as Dean and Seamus drank from each other’s cups, as Blaise knocked back a shot with a “I’ll try anything once.”

He watched as Draco sat stock still, staring at the bottle in his hand as if it had mortally offended him. He didn’t take a drink.

Try as he might, he couldn’t ignore the sinking feeling deep in his gut. He was too sober for this.

Harry paced back and forth in front of the door, repeatedly calling up the Room but never entering. 

I need a safe space.

I need to see Draco.

I need our room.

The bottle spun and spun and spun, or was that the room spinning? Harry had been getting tipsier and tipsier during these parties, unable to bear the persistent ache in his chest any longer than absolutely necessary. 

At the beginning the ache had only appeared during these parties, watching Draco allow himself to relax a little, counting the tiny wisps of hair that escaped his normally-neat ponytail. Recently, however, the ache had followed Harry wherever he went, calling up images of Draco’s small smile when he got the right answer in class, the bags under his eyes after a night of no sleep, the sound of his giggles when he was tipsy. 

Harry didn’t know how much longer he could stand it. 

He didn’t know how long he stood outside the door before he finally turned the knob. He’d entirely lost track of his thoughts, and didn’t know what to expect on the other side.

Whatever it was, surely it couldn’t make the ache in his heart any worse. 

He should be used to it by now, he’d been carrying it around for so long. In his dreams — and his nightmares — at work, at the Burrow, at the pub with his friends. It was all his own fault, not even the person he was aching for was to blame. 

He’d been so young, so stupid, and he’d ruined his own life before it had even really begun. 

“Oi, Potter!” 

Harry lifted his eyes from his essay, turning towards the group by the fire. Yet another drunken games night was in full swing, but he had begged off, claiming he had too much research to do for his final Transfiguration report. 

In truth, he didn’t think he could handle the sight of a soft, silly Draco tonight — or any night. If he allowed himself to look he would do something stupid. Like kiss a boy he didn’t get to keep. 

“Get over here!” Pansy was bright-eyed, draped across Ginny’s lap as she beckoned Harry over. “Blaise just dared Draco to kiss you, and he said he’d do it!”

He steeled himself, stepping through the door before he could back out. He had done that once, he wouldn’t do it again. 

Even if it was only him, now.

“You don’t have to.” Draco’s face was downturned, but Harry could still make out the blush on his cheeks, the teeth biting into his lower lip. His eyes lifted as Harry made his way over — slowly, as if in a dream — pale blue peeking through blonde lashes, betraying all the uncertainty and hope that Harry himself was feeling.

Had Draco been wanting this, too?

“I want to,” he breathed, kneeling in front of Draco’s chair, leaning closer, closer…

The Room looked the same as it always had for the two of them. Warm fire, cozy armchairs, soft blankets thrown over them haphazardly.

The books were still there, torn pieces of parchment marking their places when they became too sleepy or too absorbed in each other to continue. Harry was pretty sure he could see an old Slytherin tie stuffed haphazardly into the corner of the couch.

He walked towards the fire in a daze, toeing off his shoes as he stepped onto the rug. The rug that Draco had been adamant about keeping clean.

The rug upon which Draco had told Harry that he loved him.

The rug upon which Draco had sat, alone, as Harry had fled.

They’d had one, blissful month. A month of stolen kisses and laughs echoing down the corridors as they ran outside, or to the Room. A month in which Harry didn’t have a single nightmare, a month of cuddles by the fire and gentle hands running through his hair.

He could feel himself falling, falling, falling. Falling in love, falling into a happiness he never thought he’d have.

Falling into a fear of all he could lose, a fear that threatened to engulf him, swallow him whole.

He pushed it aside, focusing on NEWTs and soft lips and softer giggles. He tucked each smile into his heart and tried not to think about how it would all end.

The night before graduation, Draco dragged him into the Room. “One last time,” he whispered, pushing Harry against the wall, into an alcove, against the door of the Room as it swung shut. 

“One last time.”

It echoed through his head, the finality of it stinging. And so, he hadn’t really heard what Draco was saying, not until hours, days, weeks later. Not until after he had already ruined his life.

“I love you, Harry.”

Harry dropped to his knees, head in his hands, as the sobs ripped through him. Sobs he hadn’t let himself have all those years ago. Sobs that he still didn’t deserve, even ten years on.

This was a terrible, awful idea, coming back. How could he have said yes, knowing what it would mean? How could he live here, work here, knowing that doing so would be a constant reminder to Draco of what they had had, what he himself had torn apart.

He was selfish, and heedless, running head first into a situation yet again, thinking only of himself, of his own need to see Draco one more time. 

Harry stood stoic throughout the graduation ceremony, staring resolutely ahead despite his brain screaming at him to look just a little bit to his left. He squeezed his eyes shut as Draco’s name was called, not deserving to watch as he graduated — second in their class only to Hermione.

Harry was so, so proud of him, of how hard he’d worked. But he didn’t get to feel that, not anymore. Not when he’d gone and ruined everything.

Because why would Draco still want him after he had run like a coward?

Time lost all meaning as he sat, doubled over, in front of the fire, finally allowing himself to mourn the last ten years. To feel the pain of them — his fault, all his fault — to feel the pain of his own — foolish, stupid — decision to come back.

Time stood still as arms wrapped around him, as he was pulled back against a strong chest. As he was rocked, as hands ran through his hair.

Only one pair of arms felt like that. Only one pair of hands knew just how to detangle his mess of curls.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

“Sshhh, love. It’s okay. It’s okay now.”

Harry scrambled back, rubbing furiously at his eyes as he stared at Draco in disbelief.

“No, it’s not! How can you say it’s okay when I ruined it all ten years ago! How can you stand to be here, with me?”

Draco reached out, taking Harry’s hands in his own. “You hurt me, yes. And we will need to talk about it sometime soon. But Harry, don’t you think we’ve had enough hurt and sadness? Don’t you think you’ve beaten yourself up over that night enough?”

Draco laughed as Harry stared at him in consternation. “You forget that I work with Neville, and that my best friend is married to a Weasley.” He pulled Harry back into his chest, running a tender hand over his cheek. “And if you’d stayed around long enough any time they tried to talk to you about it, you’d know that I’m not angry, never was, really. Upset, yes. But I know you, Harry. I know you were scared, and taken by surprise. I’m sorry that I didn’t come after you, that night or any in the years since.”

“I don’t deserve you.” The tears had stopped, but his heart still ached with all the time they’d lost, all the questions he was too scared to ask, even now.

“Oh, love. You deserve everything.” Soft lips pressed tender kisses to his forehead, his cheeks. “I never stopped loving you, even when I tried to. It’s always been you, Harry.”

There was so much he wanted to say. “How did you know I was here?”

“My magic felt you.”

Harry didn’t know who moved first, all he knew was soft lips on his, and hands in his hair. All he knew was the rug against his back as Draco laid him down, gently, tenderly. All he knew was the feeling rising up in his chest. 

“I love you, Draco. I love you, I love you, I love you.”

[echosprompts]

daisy jones & the six : aurora, sentence starters. 

please do not repost. feel free to change pronouns where you see fit ! enjoy !

aurora 

“you’re my morning sun.” 

“i kinda think i wanna make it last forever.” 

“i won’t disappear again.” 

“how soon can you come?” 

“where did you turn when you needed tenderness?” 

“i kinda thought that night was gonna last forever.” 

let me down easy 

“my eyes are open while my heart keeps sinking.” 

“every lie is true at the time.” 

“won’t you let me down easy if you’re going to let me down?” 

“let me down easy.”

“that could be us trading secrets no one else could understand.” 

“i got you under my skin now.”

kill you to try 

“i’ve been an angel all summer long.”

“i swear i’ve done nothing wrong.”

“could the truth ever untell those lies?” 

“would it kill you to try?”

“since i found you, i can’t stop laughing.”

“i need you.”

“you’re my better half.”

“call me back to bed with that old lullaby.”

“you’ve got no damn right to be so damn heartbroken.” 

“what is it i must do?”

“let me come home to you.”

“i’d blind myself to see it.” 

“promise me you’ll be there.”

two against three 

“boys were invincible lovers, just begging to be destroyed.”

“this was never any cause for alarm.”

“it seems you have a choice to make.”

“all i need’s a promise i can keep to myself.”

“i know our mornings were as good it ever could be.” 

“im nowhere near you.”

“im nowhere near you, nowhere near where i should be.”

look at us now (honeycomb) 

“i don’t know who i am.”

“do you know who you are?”

“is it out of our hands?”

“tell me how we made it this far.”

“did we unravel a long time ago?”

“i wish it was easy.”

“i wish it was easy, but it isn’t.”

“we could make a good thing bad.”

“where do we stand?”

“if this was your plan, tell me why you’ve been crying in the dark.”

“we used to be something to see.”

“this thing we’ve been doing ain’t working out.”

bonus: “i know we could get it all back.”

regret me

“you regret me.”

“you regret me and i’ll regret you.”

“i don’t care what you feel.”

“go ahead and regret me, but i’m beating you to it.”

“you couldn’t handle your liquor.”

“you can’t seem to handle the truth.”

“i’m perfectly ready to strike.”

“meet me in the corner where you keep me.”

“i’ll do anything you please.”

“go ahead and regret me, but i always will too regret you.”

you were gone

“can’t you tell by my face, there are things i tried to erase?”

“can’t you tell by my face?”

“there are things i try to erase.”

“the future is over now.”

“nothing ever seems to stay that way.”

“where were you?”

“when i needed you, you were gone.”

“the hand that pulled me through the center of the night was you.”

“how about we turn it off?”

“every story has an ending.”

“every story has an ended, and it’s not our job to stay.”

“how about we turn it off?”

“we’ll forget it like it’s gone.”

“we’ll forget about the way you turn me on.”

“you were gone.” 

more fun to miss

“i still need a drink.”

“for the record.”

“i’m fine with what’s left of mine.”

“almost took you by mistake for someone else.”

“it took guts to think i’d fall for that wink.”

“that little thing you do just ain’t right.”

“you’d be more fun to miss, than to be with.”

“you’d be more fun to kiss, than to be with.”

“that’s how my little mind gets fed.”

“do i shoot straight, or do i cheat fate?”

“i don’t pull tricks.”

“you’d be just as fun as a jammed up gun.”

“another shot at the wrong place and time.”

please

“please, im down on my knees.”

“i’m down on my knees.”

“i have a family.”

“merged with the terrible urge every night.”

“please, if it’s only a single bite.”

“i’m down on my knees like a jesuit.” 

“i need what i can’t unsee to disappear.”

“i’m the worst at this.”

“i need you to say no.”

“at least meet me under the table for a kiss.”

“know i’m better than all of this.”

“never give me a second chance.”

“please.”

the river 

“tell me again, why do we stay on such a lonely road?” 

“we’re on the same side.”

“will you stay with me forever?”

“will you chase me in my dreams?”

“you had a choice i couldn’t make.”

“give me your hand, here is my heart.”

“give me your hand.”

“here is my heart.”

“where does it end?”

“where do we start?”

“i’m echo in your shadow.”

“i’m in too deep.”

“i lost you.”

“i know this isn’t fair.”

“i know i love you now.” 

“i love you.”

no words

“i just don’t know the words.”

“babe.”

“everything i’ve tried so far just doesn’t feel right.”

“all i could do is hope you don’t take it the wrong way.” 

“if all i can do is say, ‘don’t take it the wrong way’.”

“don’t take it the wrong way.”

“i'm at the end of my mind.”

“i’m trying to do the right thing.”

“i'm at the end of my mind trying to do the right thing.”

[promiscuouspomegranate]

still not recovered from the Carnell x reader… i need more of him.. 🤤🤤🤤

please i need one where instead of that STUPID IDIOT SAYING HE HATES US we go in and smooch his lips and it doesn’t even have to end with abduction i just.. i need my man 🤤🤤🤤

TWs: Carnell couldn’t handle the kiss and got too excited… 😞

He might offer a handkerchief first for all that drool..!

But if you kissed him.. it might’ve gone a little something like this…

“I’m going to kiss him today,” I stood up and gathered my belongings, “I know I’ve said that a thousand times, but I’m going to do it.”

“Well, good luck with that,” My friend hugged me and dreamily sighed, “I wonder if Lila needs someone to massage her back after carrying your entire class.”

I rolled my eyes and hugged them back before going to the practice room. I was incredibly excited to work with Carnell; I felt my heart pounding as I reached the door. My hand weakly opened the door, and I stepped inside.

“You’re late again,” Carnell playfully teased, “I assume you barely made any progress on our song?”

I almost retorted but took a deep breath.

“Carnell, could we try something different today? I need help learning a song on the piano,” I took a step closer and set my violin down, “Could you help me?”

“I– Of course, I could assist you, Y / N,” Carnell seemed flustered and put his sheet music back in its black binder, “Besides, considering how miserable your violin is, you will need the help of the best to teach you how to play.”

Usually, I would think of a witty comeback, but I decided to let Carnell boast. After all, I figured his resentment was his way of poorly masking his innermost feelings toward me.

“This song is uhm,” I felt my hands shake as I gripped the piece of paper. Sweat stained what was once pristine, and I nervously muttered, “It’s a bit abstract in how you uhm.. perform it.”

“What do you mean? Here, let me see it,” He grabbed it from me before I could protest.

I watched as his eyes widened as he read the song. I felt my heart pound as he shakily set it down on the bench.

“Your song is terrible,” He furiously blushed and scoffed, “I’ve seen better compositions from elementary students. I suppose, out of kindness and pity, I will teach you how to perform it.”

I sat beside him on the bench and set my hands on the cool, white keys. Our thighs brushed against each other as the song “For Carnell” stared into our shy souls.

“You want to start your fingers on the middle C,” He grabbed my hands and positioned them to the right spot–disregarding any musical knowledge I had.

“Like this,” I coyly asked, deciding to play into his little fantasy, “It’s been a while since I last played piano.”

Instead of listening to his instructions, I let my hands cautiously wander down the keys to his. I moved closer to him on the bench and awkwardly attempted to flirt.

“Your hands aren’t as rough as mine; it’s nice,” I felt a heat rise in my face as I regretted my choice of words. I fell back to my old ways and quickly added, “Hah! I guess that proves I practice more than you do.”

Silence filled the air like a burning fire, and our fear of vulnerability kindled the flames.

“I fear you are mistaken, as per usual,” Carnell lightly held my hand and examined it, “Your hands are like delicate little p-petals.”

“The skin on my hands is rough,” I guided his hand to my blushing face, “It’s softer here.”

Eyes locked and lingered on facial features as shyness slowly transformed into yearning. The sun seeped in from the window and highlighted natural beauty. Reality blurred as hidden fantasies emerged.

“You’re a pretty boy, Carnell,” I stopped thinking and softly smiled. I leaned in closer and whispered, “Can I kiss you?”

“Please,” He murmured and closed his eyes.

Arms wrapped around bodies as lips revealed every unspoken feeling. I felt our hearts touch as his lips passionately pressed against mine. I slowly pulled away and savored every moment. A stupid, lovestruck smile swept across my face as I sighed.

“I was hoping this would happen,” I chuckled and stared at him, “Do you like me, Carnell?”

Silence filled the air again as my heart ached for an answer. I felt his hand firmly grab my arm as I looked at him dumbstruck.

“I don’t just like you, Y / N,” His eyes widened as a saccharine smile plagued his face, “Oh, I am fervently and exceedingly devoted to your existence. You are my sun and my moon, my goddess and my devil, and my muse and damnation.”

His words felt unnerving and his mannerisms were no longer charming. His fingernails dug into my skin as his affections overpowered his reason.

“Kiss me again,” He pleaded, “I want to feel your mouth all over my skin.”

[danceswithsporks]

On the 1st day of Bad Batchmas I gave to all of yooouuuu!!!

Omega in a Tree!!

I’ve decided to write little snippets up until our boys return from war! Err…Season 2 arrives.

Now this will take place in the universe I’ve built for my fic A Star Above the Rest! Some may be sneak peaks at future events, little glimpses into past events, or things I wanted to do but couldn’t work into the story! I hope you all enjoy them and Happy Holidays!

12 Days of Bad Batchmas Day 1- Omega in a Tree

“Hunter?” Omegas darling eyes turned towards the long haired clone. “Do you ever regret taking me with you?”

Hunter looked out over the vast forest below them. He and Omega had climbed the tallest tree they could find to keep lookout while Tech and Echo fixed the Marauder. Wrecker was out in the woods searching for something, though he wouldn’t tell Omega what. As for Crosshair, well he was somewhere avoiding the small clone. Omegas question had caught him by surprise, slowly his gaze shifted back to the little girl. “Why would you ask something like that?”

A punishment? Now who would think something like that? “Omega? Do you think it’s a punishment to be with us? After all, we’re the defective clones.”

“Not at all.” Omega smiled at her brother, father figure? She didn’t care honestly. They were her family. “You didn’t answer my question.” Leaning against his arm, she looked back towards the now setting sun.

“Come down, and we’ll all answer the question.” Hunter nudged her before moving to climb down. Omega smiled brightly and nodded. “Climbing down or are ya gonna be a backpack?”

A bell filled laugh came from the blonde as she reached out to Hunter. “Should take advantage of this for as long as I can, shouldn’t I?”

“We’ll always figure out a way to carry ya, kid.”

-*-

“There’s my favorite sister!” Wrecker crosses the space between the ship and Omega in four easy steps. His bag arms scooped the girl up easily before placing her on his shoulder.

Another delighted laugh came from Omega as she was lifted like a feather. “Wrecker, I’m your only sister!” Her caramel eyes lit up as she was carried back to the others.

“What took you two so long?” Tech tapped at his datapad quickly before looking back to Omega. This had been a good idea, to take her in. He’d have to let Zirena know.

“Omega had a question for all of us.” Crossing his broad arms, Hunter nodded to the girl to ask her question once more.

“Do you guys regret taking me with you?” Her eyes shifted between all of her brothers. She expected Echo to reassure her, Wrecker to make a joke, Tech to give her some facts, Crosshair to remain silent and Hunter to say something caring. She knew her family like the back of her hand.

“In the beginning you were a nuisance.” Crosshair chewed his toothpick, all eyes turning to the sniper quickly. “Now though.” He crossed the space between them, the toothpick now between his fingers. “Now you’re more of a bother.”

Omega watched as a rare smirk appeared on his lips. “Is a bother better than a nuisance?” It was hard to figure out.

“Much better.” Wrecker reached up and tapped her nose. “Now, wanna see what we’ve been up to?”

“I thought you were fixing the ship?” Her eyes scanned the group as they all smiled, except for Crosshair. But a smirk and a shift of his toothpick would be enough.

“Had to pick up something.” Echo stepped over towards the ship and tapped the panel for the door to open. “Or someone.”

“Someone?” Her eyes looked to the ship and a large smile passed her lips. “Cal!” Wreckers large hands wrapped around her waist and placed her down. She quickly ran towards the young padawan and hugged him tightly. “What are you doing here?”

Cal hugged Omega back excitedly as BD chirped from his shoulder. “Captain Howzer got called to Ryloth. So my Master arranged for you guys to take me to her!”

“Cal will be with us for about a week. Promised Zirena that we’d show him the ropes.” Echo winked at the two kids. “Think we can handle that?”

A mischievous grin crossed Omegas lips as so many wonderful ideas came to mind. “Definetly.” Grabbing Cals hand she pulled him towards the forest. “Let’s start with climbing a tree.”

Cal laughed as he followed behind Omega, BD hot on their heels. “I know how to climb a tree, Mega!”

Omega stopped dead in her tracks before looking back to Cal. “Without using the force?”

“Oh. No.” Now that he thought about it, he didn’t know how to do too much without using the force.

“Perfect!” Grabbing his hand once more she led him back to the tree from earlier.

Hunter visibly winced as Cal tripped while chasing after Omega. “Think we can handle a Jedi and Omega?” If Cal got hurt Zirena would kill him.

Echo sighed as he rubbed his scomp against his head. “Well, we’ll find out soon enough. Won’t we. Besides, if it comes down to it, I have Zirena on speed dial.”

An exhausted sigh came from the leader. “Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.”

-*-

Cal and Omega sat in a tree overlooking the vast forest below. The sun had set and a golden moon now rested in the sky. Their dinner had been brought to them and as each one finished their drinks, Cal asked a question he had been thinking about. “Do you ever regret going with them?”

Omega shook her blonde locks as a happy smile graced her lips. “Nah, they're my family. How could I ever regret that?”

“Even Crosshair?” Cal could sense the sniper somewhere nearby, watching them no doubt.

A shrug came from her, the smile still there. “Even Cross. He started out as a nuisance but now he’s just a bother.”

“A brother that bothers?”

“Yes, a brother that bothers.”