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homelanderbutbig · 17 days ago

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With You By My Side (G/T Homelander x Reader)

1842 words. Hurt/comfort, and a bit of angst. Homelander is 8 feet tall. Reader is non-descriptive. Established relationship.

Homelander hurts you during a nightmare, and somehow he's more affected. Inspired by this ask.

While you don't know the full extent of Homelander's past, you know how he struggles to sleep at night. He may start out normally, but like clockwork, there is always a nightmare. Remnants of his traumatic childhood that still infest his psyche, jolting him from his slumber. You've seen him in the morning, waking from his horrid memories with a haunting gasp. Despite his heightened fear he still allows you to comfort him, snuggling his head into your chest and calming him down with your soothing words.

It isn't a perfect way to deal with his trauma, but it helps having someone there to guide him through it. Knowing that he can be safe in your arms no matter what he's dreamt brings him a meager level of solace he never was allowed to experience.

But this time, that didn't happen.

The evening comes and goes as normal, ending with the both of you sleeping in his bed. It must have been very late when you stirred awake hearing noises coming from beside you. You usually are a pretty sound sleeper, this was the first time you've caught him mid-nightmare. He's in an absolute state of disarray; his breaths are frenzied, his eyes are twitching uncontrollably, and his fists are clenching his bedsheets so tightly you swear he ripped them.

"Hey, wake up honey," you whisper, reaching out to touch his hand. You aren't really sure of the protocol to wake someone experiencing night terrors, but all you understand in this moment is Homelander needs help.

What ensues is faster than you can react. Your nudging indeed jolts him from his dreams, but even just a simple touch creates an automatic fight-or-flight response. With a guttural yell he launches upwards, eyes alight with a crimson heat as he swats fiercely at the imagined danger laying a finger on him.

In his dreams he was reliving a crystal clear memory of when he was a child in the lab, surrounded by doctors preparing another experiment on him. They were poking and prodding, sharp instruments gliding all over his body, his skin perceiving the searing and stabbing pain like it was truly real. When one particular touch pushes him over the edge, he awakes and immediately attacks in an attempt to protect himself.

However, instead of the familiar faces of the doctors he grew to despise, Homelander sees nobody in front of him. The ghosts of his past have released him from their grasp. Catching his breath he scans what is in front him, and begins to recognize his surroundings. He's safe, he's in his bedroom… but then…

Oh no.

In his bid to force whatever was touching him away, his large hand struck you so hard that he broke your wrist. He can easily see the extent of the damage with his X-ray vision. And you're glancing up at him in utter shock, clearly in pain but the extent of it not entirely hitting you yet.

His lasers dissipate as he stares directly at you, eyes wide and unblinking, mouth slightly open but unable to form a sentence. Everything around him no longer feels like reality. His heart is beating out of his chest, tears flowing down his cheeks as he is consumed by the realization of what he's done. The one thing he swore he would never do, hurt the sole person on earth that he loves.

He doesn't say one word to you before he frantically runs out of the bed and flies away from the balcony launchpad. He doesn't even take the 20 seconds to put his suit on, he couldn't stand the sight of what he'd done any longer.

Now you're alone to deal with the injury he's caused.

~~~

You're eternally grateful that there was still security roaming the Tower floors so late at night, and that nobody was questioning why you were walking around Vought wearing your pajamas. Everything that happened after Homelander broke your wrist was a blur, you were running on pure adrenaline. After he flew away, you rushed out to the elevator and went down to the main floor, calling out for help which luckily was not too far away. You were whisked away to the hospital, where your wrist was X-rayed and a cast was applied. Now with your pain under control, the doctor asked where you would be staying while you healed.

By the time you return to the penthouse, it's late in the afternoon. You considered not going back at all, perhaps just renting a hotel room and spending some time away from Homelander to process what transpired. But realistically you knew that was never going to happen, when you're dating a man who can hear your heartbeat from across the city. It's best to just confront him, and hash out these problems together.

Walking through the rooms, you notice how it doesn't seem like he's been back yet. Or so you thought, as peering into the bedroom reveals that his suit is missing from his bedside stand. He must have returned at some point to dress himself, but making certain that you weren't there. You can't say that it isn't something out of the ordinary; he will avoid you if he's feeling guilty about upsetting you with one of his shenanigans. And this time what he did was a doozy.

While contemplating in his bedroom, you hear the familiar sound of Homelander touching down on his balcony. He couldn't bear the long elevator ride up to the penthouse, and he's had enough time to be alone with his thoughts. After fleeing last night he hid out in the only place he can find reprieve in, his cabin. Yet he couldn't sleep, he was relentlessly pacing back and forth trying to come to terms with what occurred. He's always so careful to mind his strength, but he always knew this would happen eventually. There was a reason Madelyn never let him touch her; she was like you, a measly human. You might be intellectually on the same playing field, but physically... not only does he tower above you, he can also crush your skull with a flick of his wrist. One wrong move on his part and your life would be snuffed out.

And now you both have to come to the conclusion he's been obsessed with since he's gotten close to you. Your relationship was never going to work, it was doomed from the start.

You sigh to yourself, seeing him standing like a statue in the living room. Although he's facing your direction, his eyes are strictly planted on the ground. He's clearly held captive by his thoughts, the fear of what might happen next overtaking any rationality he usually possesses.

"Homelander," you call out to him, snapping him out of his dissociation as he jerks his head up. Now being able to see his face, you can tell how distressed this accident has been for him. His hair is unkempt from a lack of styling, his expression is dishevelled and drained, his eyes are bloodshot, and the residue of tears shed not long ago stain his face. He is a mess, but a mess of his own creation.

Because he was worried about you.

"Come lie down with me," you coax him as you use the stepping stool placed on the ground to maneuver on top of the bed. At first he refuses to move, but he can tell by the determined look in your eyes that you won't be taking no for an answer.

Tensing his jaw, he walks to the side opposite of you and hesitantly descends onto the bed. He's as still as a corpse in a coffin, petrified to move even in the slightest bit. Even moreso when he sees you shift closer to him, leaning against his pillow so you can look down at his big head.

"S-sorry…" you hear him mumble. The silence between you two was beginning to eat at him, and he had to say something… even if he was scared that you wouldn't forgive him.

"Sweetheart, it's okay. It wasn't your fault, I still love you," you reassure him. You can tell he's still struggling to accept your unconditional affection, especially now that's his greatest fear has been realized. He's hurt you, how can you even think of staying with him?

You're aware Homelander had an isolated childhood, and as a result he tends to overexamine his relationships. Every time he gets close to someone, he must look for the slightest hint of that person getting ready to leave him. They always do. It's times like these that really exemplify how despite being a foreboding eight foot tall giant, breaking through his 'tough guy persona' reveals that he's just a lonely, vulnerable child at heart. One who's only ever been abandoned, and who's desperate to never let that happen again.

"You know what humans and supes have in common?" you question him, smiling as he shakes his head no. He hasn't taken his eyes off you since he's lied down. "We're resilient. We might get hurt, but we all have the strength to heal the best we can. And I will heal too, with you by my side, there to help me."

With your one good arm you stroke his cheek with your palm. He wastes no time in angling his head into your delicate touch, craving this intimacy that he fretted he was going to lose forever. And the longer you pet him, the more his self-imposed burdens ease. The creases on his forehead and his furrowed brows have finally relaxed, leaving him with nothing more than to melt into your affection.

"You look like you're exhausted baby boy, you haven't gotten any sleep huh?" you ask, observing how Homelander is fighting a losing battle to keep his eyes open. And you're feeling quite tired yourself; you've been wired awake since your wrist was broken.

"I-I… I can't…" he stutters, tears once more forming in his eyes as a fresh wave of anxiety builds in his chest. "W-what i-if…"

"What if nothing," you cut him off, halting his crying once you lean down to kiss his forehead. "I'm not going to abandon you. If you have another nightmare, so be it. I will be here for you when you wake up, same as always. I promise to help you heal too."

Sighing deeply through his nose, he gives a nod in agreement to your words. He's too tired to fight back against your suicidal decision to stay with him… not that he'd want to anyway. Resting his big head against your chest, he's quickly lulled into slumber by the dulcet sounds of your heart in his ears, and the pleasant sensations of your fingers running along his scalp.

And for the first time in what feels like forever, Homelander wakes up in the morning feeling peaceful. He's safely snuggled up against the love of his life, and you kept your promise. You helped protect him from a nightmare.

#the boys #the boys tv #homelander #homelander x reader #g/t #size difference #my writing

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lilithliliam · 1 year ago

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My quiet haven

Warnings: Yandere themes. Teacher/student relationship. Obsessive and possessive behavior. There is no bloodthirstiness, there is no theme of death. Manipulation and pressure. The reader is a virgin. NSFW. Jealousy.

The reader is studying with Gojo temporarily, cause she don't plan to be a sorceress. The reader is 18 years old. She must learn to use her power, which is why she came to study in Tokyo.

It’s hard to imagine a Gojo who loves someone very much, let alone Yandere Gojo, but it turns out that this can happen. Where did it all start? Gojo is not particularly interested in people, to be honest, but he really loves and cares about his students. About all of them without exception, but recently he began to notice that he devotes much more time and attention to one of his students than to others, and is it even possible to blame him for this. After all, she, his student, is the very embodiment of femininity, beauty and kindness. She's not like everyone else, she's not angry at him for his childish nature, she doesn't think he's arrogant, or she doesn't have a stupid crush on him. She always seemed to be able to somehow read his emotions. He could say that there was absolutely nothing wrong with him, that his mission had been more successful than ever, that he was not tired at all, but she could understand how he felt just by looking once. When all his students left, she approached him and asked about his well-being, whether he was tired, whether he was accidentally injured. Did he need anything? And she asked with such genuine concern that Satoru involuntarily felt something in his chest - was moving. At first, he brushed off her questions, not wanting to pester her with his problems, but then he didn’t even understand how he began to open up. In one of the most vulnerable moments, when she was the only one who realized that something was wrong with him, with the strongest. She just came up and despite all the assurances that everything was fine, she hugged him tightly. As tightly as she could. She told him not to hide his feelings, because we all are people. He is a human after all. No matter how strong he is, he is still a person who is no stranger to pain, fatigue and suffering. And this is not something to be ashamed of.

"I can't even imagine the heavy burden you carry every day, sensei ,but please don't carry it alone. Whenever you need, whenever you feel alone, I will always be here for you. I can hardly help a lot, but I can listen to you. And no matter what you say, it will always remain between us,” she told him.

She hugged him, pressing his head to her chest and stroking his hair. She whispered various soothing things. And he...just melted like plasticine in her wonderful hands. He felt like a lonely abandoned child who had finally found shelter, a warm home. That day he himself did not understand how he fell asleep. But he slept well then. And then the germ of interest that he experienced in her even at the first meeting grew into true love. He didn't care that she was his student, that she was younger. She will only study for a year and she is already 18. He has been single for so many years that who cares about her age or the family she comes from. Gojo knew that he had earned himself at least one happiness in life and he was going to take care of its safety.

She was kind in character in general. She was kind to everyone, from a small bug on the sidewalk which she picked up and planted on a nearby flower so that it would not be given away, to the janitor for whom she bought coffee in a very cold time, knowing that he would probably frozen And of course she was kind to her classmates. She cared, but not too persistently, for Megumi, hugged and supported Itadori, saying that even though he is a vessel of Sukuna, this doesn't mean that he is bad. She listened and gave advice to Nobara and went shopping with her. She calmed down and even prepared Nanami’s favorite bread and sandwiches, who, by the way, also doted on her. She became the soul and the bright sun of their entire company. And Gojo was fine with this for the time being.

However, over time, he became even more clingy than before. He began to constantly demand her attention. Her worries. If she devoted time to someone else, he would create scandals and hysterics. When he finished his missions, the first thing he did was rush to her and showed off like a kid. And she smiled and praised. Thanked him for his hard work. Prepared sweets or other food for him just because knew that after the mission he would probably want to eat something. And he could sit all night with her in the living room or in her room, eating sweets or chips and watching some movie. He would constantly cry at the sad moments and laugh out loud at the funny ones, but one thing was invariable: he would either lie on her chest or on her lap while she instinctively stroked his hair. When she was once enthusiastically reading some book, he became hysterical like a child and threw it somewhere, while refusing to look at her, and childishly pouting his lip, showing that he was the victim here. At first she was indignant, but then, instead of to reprimand him, she sighed quietly and opened her arms, where he immediately rushed, forgetting about his offense because she forgot about him for THREE WHOLE MINUTES!

Her classmates also noticed Gojo’s strange attitude towards her, but she brushed it off and said that he was like a big baby or a living teddy bear and that he needed to be cuddled and cherished, otherwise he would behave completely capriciously. They didn't approve of this, but seeing how happy Gojo was they couldn't resist. She noticed that his actions were strange at times, but she convinced herself that Gojo was very lonely. She understood the burden people had placed on him since his birth. How they don't let him be normal. And his childish behavior was justified by the lack of a normal childhood before. Seeing one day how bad he really was, she decided that at least she could understand him, not put pressure on him, could become his quiet haven where he could come to rest. She wanted nothing more than for her mentors Gojo and Nanami to finally be able relax and do what you really want. One day Gojo felt that he was ready to completely open up to her. He told everything that was in his heart. About his best friend Geto, who betrayed him to the point of taking his life himself. He expected contempt in her eyes, although he understood that she was not that kind of girl, but he was afraid of her reaction. But she smiled softly and said that it was probably hard for him. And that she understood him. She feels sorry for his friend, she feels sorry for that girl. But the past cannot be changed. If Geto was his best friend, then he understands his actions and does not hold a grudge against him, so Satoru should also forgive himself: she told him. He first smiled and then...cried. He cried in her lap as she stroked his hair in an attempt to calm him down. He calmed down and he and she even agreed to visit Geto’s grave together next time. It would seem that everything was fine. Everyone was happy. Gojo has finally found his soul mate. A person ready to accept him. Here she is, the perfect girl. Strong, albeit weaker than him, beautiful, although not more beautiful than him(joke). But something is still wrong. He looks at her communicating with Yuji and Nanami and something strange stirs in his chest. He watches carefully as she hands a basket, probably with food, into Nanami's hands. After all, Gojo himself saw how she prepared him and suddenly realizes. Oh yes, exactly. This feeling is called... anxiety. No no. Jealousy. No... uncertainty? No, stupidity. So that Satoru Gojo himself, the strongest magician, feels insecure? Nonsense. But deep down he is afraid that she does not feel the same, that she might choose someone younger, like Yuji, someone more responsible like Nanami. But he's not going to give up. He's lost enough people and he's not going to lose any more. He knows for sure that he doesn't want her to care about anyone else. Especially about Nanami. After all, after so much time spent with her, it seems that she did not look at him differently, although Satoru tried to look after her. He gave her sweets, put flowers in her room, or if she was just walking, he appeared out of nowhere and dragged her to the nearest cafe to try a new food, but apparently this was not enough. So Gojo decided to act more decisively. And show her intentions, because even if she guessed about his feelings, she tried not to pay attention to it.

Gojo had hugged her before, like all his students, but now his hugs became more frequent, lower and more intimate? Although she felt that something was wrong, she tried to blame it on paranoia. When she was cooking, he could hug her and put his head on her shoulder and inhale the smell of her hair. One day, when she was eating candy that he bought her, for some reason in the shape of a heart, he asked how it tasted. She says it’s very tasty and he took the candy she bit and ate it, closing his eyes in satisfaction. One day he took her phone to check the time, but then when she took her phone again, on the lock screen there was a photo of them that they took with everyone, but only... the rest of the participants were cut out and only him and Gojo remained. By the way, he put the same photo on his phone. She also noticed that next to his contact there was now a red heart. And sometimes she woke up in the morning with a heaviness on her stomach and when she opened her eyes, she found a sleeping Gojo who was hugging her tightly, trying to fit on her bed. Slowly but surely he became a part of her life, her social circle, slowly and surely filling her entire world. One day, while walking in a store, he offered her to buy “mochi” in the shape of a heart, which were sold for Valentine’s Day, to which she quite logically replied:

-But, Gojo sensei, this is for couples

“Well, yes, we’re dating so what’s the problem here,” he told her as if nothing had happened.

-I love you, you love me and...call me Satoru-sama now, right? She was numb for a minute, not knowing how to refuse him, and he, of course, took advantage of this.

-You take care of me, cook for me, hug me, comfort me. This of course means that you like me as much as I like you. And you will not leave me like everyone else. Don't hurt my feelings. Well, of course, and how can you not love me.I’m so charming,

- he said, knowing that he was manipulating her, leaving her no choice, but he didn’t care. She was his and no one, not even she herself, could change that.

And she, in turn, thought: This is the first time that Gojo is truly happy, it took so much time to heal his wounds, but she won’t open his wounds again and leave new ones? How can she do this to him? Yes, and she must admit that over time she herself began to have feelings for him. It’s hardly pity, rather admiration along with the desire to care. The maternal instinct must be making itself felt, because he's like real child (or maybe it’s just a skillful manipulation by Satoru) So she decided that why not. She will give him a chance.And she did not quite confidently confirm the fact of their relationship, and Satoru was not even shy about rare people in the store, and kissed her right there, because he had been craving this for so long.

As for intimate matters, everything is simple. His beloved is 18 years old, in fact, she is not even his student, and Gojo also has his own... needs. Therefore, he probably won’t want to wait, or give her time to prepare for this mentally. He will gently hint to her by saying something like:

"Hey hey, a wonderful day to lose your virginity, don't you think?"

"How is my favorite virgin doing?"

He constantly kisses her on the lips and moves lower. Will constantly touch her. And one day he will invite her to his house to watch a film. But she felt how it would end, after all, it was Satoru. He almost directly stated that he wanted her. Before she had time to enter his apartment, he was already heart-rendingly and greedily kissing her lips. Lifting her by the ass, he carried her onto the bed while crushing the fat of her ass. Climbing on top of her, he kissed her as if he wanted her to choke on either his tongue or his saliva. While his long, muscular arms explored her entire body, hastily ridding her of her clothes. Having finished with the kiss, leaving a thread of their common saliva on her lips that dripped onto her bare collarbones, he kissed lower. Frantically kissing the beads of her hardened nipples and putting one in his mouth, he began to suck, twisting it around his tongue, causing a series of moans from his beloved. He barely looked away from her soft and elastic breasts and began to look at her greedily, God, how he wanted to take a picture of her now, it was just a pornographic look. He wanted to remember this for the rest of his life. But this was her first time, he had to be softer and more gentle and please her first, and then himself. He sank lower, from her navel, sunken tummy to her femininity and she screamed. Her whole body arched and she pulled Gojo's head closer to her peak and Gojo moaned out loud.

She wriggled like a snake, simultaneously dropping sweet moans that gave him an incentive to move on. He greedily sucked, licked and even stuck his nimble tongue into her, stimulating places that she probably didn’t even know existed. Using his thumb, stroking and occasionally rubbing her clitoris or alternating it with his tongue, and inserting first one then a second finger into her, he quickly brought her to the peak and she moaned loudly and protractedly. He stood up and took off his T-shirt as he walked, wiping his wet mouth and face with it.

"Damn, damn baby. This is the best thing I've ever eaten. I wish you would give me this instead of the usual tomorrow and dinner, baby," he told her.

While she was trying to recover from a violent orgasm, he unzipped his pants and hastily stayed in his boxers, wet from his own secretions, in which his erect penis could be clearly seen. He desperately needed to be in her. He seemed ready to cum now if she just touched him.

She felt something hard and smooth sliding along her wet folds, occasionally touching her clitoris, causing a new wave of goosebumps and moans. Then slowly, as slowly as he could, testing all his patience, Gojo began to enter her. She seemed to suffocate from the feeling of being so stretched and full, something strange was tickling her stomach from the inside.

Now it was real torture for him not to move. It was incredibly tight, hot and very humid! The vaginal muscles tightly wrapped around the penis. The heat that came from them was driving them crazy, prompting them to immediately start moving. But he couldn't afford to be rude, not with her!

He bows his head in a gentle kiss, pulls out of her slightly, and makes a careful push back.

For the first time, a girl feels the movements of a man inside her.

She clasps her hands behind his neck. She doesn’t yet understand how she feels.

Another soft, not strong, deep push. He barely comes out of her before entering again to the end, as if he is rocking the two of them on the waves.

Her quiet moan escapes directly into his lips, breaking the kiss.

Tries the amplitude a little more. So wet that he easily slides in it, feeling the pleasant friction of the sensitive organ.

He told himself that he shouldn't lose patience, that he should be gentle, but... God, he couldn't do it anymore. It felt like heaven, like pure bliss, like a drug in its purest form.

Her pussy was warm, tight, reactive and wet - it was everything he had dreamed of and more.

He tried to be soft, tried to be slow, but hearing her meow and whimper he lost all remnants of willpower and self-control. He set a leisurely rhythm, simultaneously comforting her with sweet words, saying how well she was doing, how great she was and how well she accepted him. Just be patient, okay, is it okay for me, baby? “Be patient with love,” he whispered to her, but he himself seemed about to go crazy.

-Darling, my love, I just want to make you feel good? Okay?

Trying to distract himself and distract her from the unpleasant sensations of stretching, he kissed her cheeks, ears and her sensitive neck.

Surrendering to his tender kisses, she forgot about the pain and completely relaxed.

-It's okay, I'm okay.

-Are you sure honey, damn... say yes

To which she nodded and smiled. And he couldn't stand it anymore. Spreading her legs wide and pressing them to her chest, he began to quickly and hard enter her, his snow-white, coarse pubic hair and the slapping of his pelvis causing additional friction, stimulating her clitoris, bringing her to the edge. Quick thrusts that quickly spread her apart causing her to open up and make room for him inside, stretching her walls and letting them mold to the shape of his cock.

She arches her back, groaning protractedly. Clings to Satoru's shoulders, maintaining his balance. Gojo grabs her throat with his wet palm, speeding up the rhythm.

There is a catastrophic shortage of air. She moans loudly in her lover's ear, squeezing his hair with her palm.

She feels intoxicated already from the sounds he makes. A primal, deep growl emanates from his chest as he looks down to where you are both connected in heart and soul. Forever and ever... He makes his way inside of you, taking pleasure in your whines and squeals and pitiful meows.

-Go-jo ah, more, nhh I want

-Yes Yes Yes, baby. Let's.Do it. Do. You can my darling.

A pleasant spasm tightens in the lower abdomen. She whines, resting her forehead on the man's neck. A shiver runs through my body. The heartbeat quickens, the head is spinning. She clenches inside and moans loudly.

A powerful orgasm breaks through her body, she closes her eyes to white spots, sinking her teeth into Satoru’s neck.

Her second orgasm was more intense than the first, her cunt throbbing around his cock as pleasure pierced her with outstretched claws, ravaging every part of her.

He groaned. "I'm feeling it. You're squeezing my... oh... I'm going to, damn nhhhh.

His body was on fire, pleasure coursing through every nerve as he continued to fuck your quivering pussy, the lewd wet slaps of flesh on flesh accompanying his wanton, wild moans.

-I'm here, almost. Me too. Babe. Babe. Babe.

He screamed as if in a fit and then moved again, then again and again until the white pearls of sperm stained her insides. He waited a little longer, a heavy exhalation escaping his lips, dripping from his forehead, nose and hair. And then he collapsed exhaustedly on top of her, without leaving her. Remembering that he actually rolled heavily to one side and laid her on his chest, trying to even out his breathing. He stroked her hair and gave her a short laugh, kissing her on the top of her head.

-It was, it was... indescribable. You're so good... for...me

He whispered to her various nonsense, words of love, promises. Until felt that she was sleeping.

-Good night, my not virgin. He whispered in her ear, admiring her peaceful, sleeping face with red cheeks and rejoicing at his victory and understanding what it means to be happy. He felt happier than ever. Felt peace, tranquility and tranquility.

He finally found his man, his home. Your own quiet haven. And now no one will dare to encroach on him, no one will dare even look at her. She is his. He branded her, made her completely his, and soon he will build a house for them. He will put her there, he will admire her for hours, he will be the only one, he will teach her himself. He will make her a child, marry her. Don’t want to share her with a child, but it’s better than some Nanami. Let Kento look for another. After all, she is... only his Quiet Haven.

I don't own this arts

#gojo satoru #jjk x reader #jjk gojo #gojou satoru x reader #jujutsu kaisen satoru #gojo sensei #yandere #yandere gojo #jjk yandere #teacher crush #sensei gojo #jujutsu kaisen #sorcery fight

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002yb · 1 year ago

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if you're up for it, could you say more about infertile alpha dick? or recommend any fics?

It's a detail about himself that Dick keeps close to his chest

Went through all the stages of grief over it. Straddles the line between acceptance and resignation because Dick has a complicated relationship with how he feels about having a family of his own

On the one hand, no. Absolutely not. He's aware of the lifestyle he chooses to live and he's conscious of the fact that he won't give it up for anything. Doesn't matter how he wants or yearns for something - Dick chooses vigilantism and he won't put his mate/his pup/any child through that stress/potential for danger/capacity for loss. Dick's life isn't conducive for stability or happiness (he doesn't deserve it).

On the other hand, yes. Please, yes. Because Dick has always wanted a love like his parents. He's nostalgic for the family that was taken from him too soon. He wants a mate, a pack, pups. A whole litter of them - a circus of his own.

The softest alpha when he comes across an expecting omega; always unwittingly lights up because of it.

The same goes for pups. Dick adores them. Is good with them. They congregate around him because he's fun, sure, but more than that it's this hindbrain thing of recognizing safety

Dick doesn't think he'd make a good alpha, let alone a good dad; he doesn't recognize that a lot of people already see him that way in both regards

When anyone asks about his plans for that part of his future, he deflects. He's good about it; discreet. Some people pick up on it before others, but regardless of who figures something might be wrong, Dick doesn't want to talk about it. It's forgotten about, soon enough. A secret for Dick to keep.

It's a bit painful when people talk about what a lovely family he'll have one day though because he knows that's not in the cards for him. It's not even a choice.

It's for the better though, he lies to himself. Again and again.

Basically longing x10000000 but Dick will deny that

Dickjay Portion:

Dick lays with his head on Jason's stomach a lot. His ear pressed to Jason's abdomen, arms wrapped loose around him as Jason scratches his fingers through Dick's hair

Spaces out a lot like that. Thinking of what a beautiful mother Jason would make. How if there was anyone for Dick to share that with - but he cuts the thought off there because it hurts. He nuzzles into Jason's stomach and forces his thoughts elsewhere.

Meanwhile Jason is internally cursing up a storm because fuck, Dick's head on his stomach like this is sweet. It's like what Jason has imagined Dick would do if Jason was -- if Jason could -- and he gets self-conscious because Jason can't give that to Dick

Basically them both making assumptions and wanting each other to be happy without realizing they're experiencing the same struggles

When they do share the truth with each other though - fuck.

Relief but also empathy and heartache and devastation for one another. Jason bringing Dick down to rest Dick's head on Jason's chest and just holding him. Because Jason is stricken by the loss on Dick's behalf. Because he's not blind. Dick can say what he wants; he can lie, but Jason sees how this man wanted that life and he can't have it. Even if Jason wanted it for himself and could give it - Dick can't.

Not getting into adoption debate here. Because guilt complex so big neither of them could pick one and leave others. That aside, concept is different from practice either way. Their lives are too dangerous and they know firsthand what it is to be damned by their livelihoods - this community.

Dickjay, but the comedic bullet point that doesn't really match the rest of the vibes here:

Dick is a kinky guy he mourns the loss of not being able to make Jason plump with his litter of pups it's just kind of tragic

Extras:

Some world where he meets Mar'i somehow and it devastates him. Not in any way that breaks him, but his heart is so full that he sure it bursts. He'd be so awestruck by her. Tender and soft and proud because she's wonderful - sweet girl.

Less niche, more general. Where Dick still helps Roy get baby Lian. Just Dick holding this precious pup to his chest, supporting her and smelling the top of her head for that pup smell and being so in love and the pup isn't even his. Dick not being so much reluctant to let go, but struggling with it all the same because he wants this; he wants and wants and wants. But it's okay because Roy treats Lian just as dear and Dick loves to see his friend have that happiness. That besides, Roy lets Dick stay. Dick gets to help look after and raise her. It's not the same, but Dick is happy for it regardless.

This idea of soft and sweet alpha!dad Dick lives alongside a separate headcanon that Dick would be the sort of dad that is peak casual. Just holding pups like footballs and rigging up questionable contraptions to keep the babe occupied while he works on something.

Oh geez this ask is becoming about Dick and babies more than anything I'm sorry but like. Dick doing pushups and kissing the top of his kid's head every time he lowers himself down? The baby giggling and smacking his face?? Meanwhile Jason is sat a little ways away, completely enamored and endeared and oops - here comes the baby fever; pup him the fuck up, please.

Only not because this is an infertile!alpha!Dick ask. Big sad.

#dick grayson #dickjay #omegaverse #also I haven't read fics that feature this but anyone knows any I'll be happy to link (and read) them! specifically infertile alpha!Dick #a true ramble of a response #infertile!dickgrayson agenda

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jnjxi · 1 year ago

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Him|

Pavitr Prabhakar × sister figure!reader

Platonic ✿

Warning: a bit angst, Sed!Pav, platonic relationship, reader's brother died :'(

The first time I met Pavitr Prabhakar my heart started bleeding again while memories of my brother resurface violently in my mind.Pavrit is elated, always full of energy and smiling.

Oh, that smile so bright it blinds, that smile so like his.

---

I loved being Spider-Girl, I loved coming home to hear my brother talk about how much he admired her, how much he admired me. But that all changed the day neither she nor I were able to catch him.

For two years I hated Spider-Girl.

The day Miguel O'Hara told me his death was my canon event I wanted to sink and for the next year I hated the universe.

Then I met Pav.

Pav eased my pain. Him so sweet and innocent, Him with that contagious smile, Him with that unique hope, Him with that energy and joy, Him who hasn't yet experienced the ugly side of being a spider-person, Him who hasn't yet experienced that excruciating pain in the heart, self-hatred or anger at the world.

He's maybe too good to be spider-man.

Now before I go home I stop by Pavitr's house and listen to Him blather about his girlfriend. I listen to Him talk about how great his aunt is, how much he likes tea, how much he enjoys spending time with Hobie and Gwen and how obvious it is to His eyes that the new guy has a crush on her.

I listen to Him complain about too much homework he has to do for the next day, I listen to Him talk and see sparks in His eyes I see hope for a better world, I see the love and passion he puts into everything he does.

I often see that little boy who ran to hug me every time I came home, the same boy I visit at the cemetery every night after I've been in Pavrit universe.

---

Now I look at Pavitr with tears in my eyes. I look at him as he is hunched over with his hands on his hair and his gaze fixed on the hole that has now swallowed many buildings.

I look at Pavitr and the fear of being able to see him disappear confuses my thoughts.

I lean towards him, placing a shaky hand on his shoulder but he doesn't seem to even notice my presence.

«Pav?»

Nothing.

«Pavitr»

he turns slightly towards me, and despite the mask covering his face I can feel the fear and desperation in his face.

«Everything will be fine, you did good. No one died that's what matters.» I smile at him even though he can't see it.

«But they could have, and now there's a giant hole sucking up the buildings. It could destroy everything » his accent is even more marked by the frustration in his voice.

«Pav, It's not your fault, you couldn't predict it, no one could. You did your best» My words seem to annoy him somehow. He take the mask off his face in one quick motion.

Now the eyes full of sparks observe me shining with tears and guilt.

«It is! I'm Spider-Man, I'm the hero! I'm supposed to avoid these things, I'm supposed to protect the citizens, not destroy the city.» Right now I no longer see the joyful child who greeted me, I see myself, I see another spider person angry at themselves.

I wrap my arms around Pavitr's shoulders and hug him. I can feel his body relax against mine, his arms around my waist and his weight on my body.

One of my hands reaches into his soft hair, gently scratching the scalp and I feel his chest rise and fall erratically as he sobs against my shoulder.

«Everything will be fine, we will fix everything. I won't leave you alone to fight»

«Do you promise?» His voice muffled against ma shoulder.

«I promise»

Him so fragile and so strong. Him full of ambitions, Him ready to do anything to protect the city, his city.

I hate this. It's awfully, but I wanted to post something.

Btw HE IS SO CUTE AND SWEET I WANT TO SQUISH HIS CHEEKS.

#pavitr prabhakar x reader #atsv x reader #pavitr x you #spiderverse pavitr #pavitr prabhakar #astv

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bloodcandied · 1 year ago

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Death Addiction 亡瘾 Chapter 1

I found out I was addicted to suicide when I was in middle school.

How did I initially find out?...... Probably because somehow I found my days uninteresting, every day was just going to school and finishing school, doing homework and eating, until suddenly, I became interested in what came after death.

I had once read a report where someone was resuscitated from the brink of death, and he said he saw the other end of the world.

And I couldn't help but wonder what the junction of life and death was really like?

On the surface, I was no different from the average junior high school boy, perhaps just a little less noisy and a little more precocious in the eyes of my elders.

Ah, you're going to say "This guy idolizes Osamu Dazai" again. I don't know if he was an addict like me, but I do know that if you try death once, just once, it's easy to get hooked on the feeling.

--I feel no anxiety, leaving all attachments behind, calmly taking a seat behind the door while the rope tied to the doorknob loops around my neck. I sink my body in peace and quiet, enjoying the suffocation. The rope gradually tightens, and the images in front of me slowly turn pink. Funny isn't it? Its surprising that your vision doesn't turn blood red or blackened, when slowly suffocating, but instead, your vision turns pink.

Some young men like to listen to songs, smoke cigarettes, slide down high slopes on bicycles, skate ...... and I like to enjoy death quietly.

There were times when I almost played it too close though. The rope was tight around my neck and my feet were slipping on the ground with no way to get up. The pink color gradually turned gray and became that "blackness" state - and no, it wasn't pain that followed, but a strange singing sound.

It was the humming sound of a child. The sound was so soft that it sounded like a mosquito's buzz in my ear.

After an unknown amount of time (maybe just a few seconds), a light source like a camera flash lit up twice in the darkness, let me think of a way to express it...... you've all experienced going through a tunnel in a car, haven't you? As the vehicle is about to leave the dimly lit tunnel, the light source of the exit keeps flashing ahead ...... It's that kind of feeling.

If the knot around my neck hadn't loosened itself, I'm afraid I would have been completely immersed in it and wouldn't have woken up.

Please don't misunderstand though. I'm not that maliciously misanthropic, I love this world. Cats, dogs, girls, dads, moms, and clean kitchen windows ...... are all cute things, right?

I simply just like to simulate hanging, putting a plastic bag over my head, and smothering myself in a bathtub ...... These are very controlled, and environmentally non-problematic ways to die. Slitting your wrists or jumping off a building, or even lying down on a railroad track, would not only be harmful to yourself, but would also cause a lot of trouble for others.

In the end, I don't feel that there is anything special about myself.

My name is Dai Xueming, I'm an ordinary student with middle to high grades, I have a quiet personality, and a hobby for experiencing death. I hate noise or violence, I hate TV dramas, I like old movies and old-fashioned makeup beauties....... You see, if you change "experiencing death" into "painting", "classical music", or "basketball", wouldn't this introduction be so boring and normal that it would be disgusting?

--Now I'm going to talk about my troubles.

Death addiction has made my life almost trouble free. No matter how much pressure I encountered to go to school, all I had to do was to enjoy the feeling of death for a few seconds, and that pressure would instantly dissipate. That's why I was in great shape academically and ranked at the top of my high school. It made my parents proud of me.

My dad had a lot of hopes for me, and they were lovely things, too; I liked the way he relied on me and made me out to be a sparkling gem. He wanted me to travel abroad for two months during the summer of my sophomore year, and then, if conditions permitted, to find an opportunity to study abroad.

The only "problems" I had were mainly financial.

In order to subsidize our family's income, we rented out the upper floor of our house. My family bought the upper and lower floors of a downtown apartment building in the early 1990s, and in the end it proved to be a wise investment.

The rent was reasonable, my parents (the landlords) were friendly, and the location was convenient ...... and soon, the tenant, named Xu Tuo, moved in.

Xu Tuo was about twenty-seven or twenty-eight years old, but appeared young and college student-like. He worked for a nearby IT company, was single, and seemed to have a great personality, and my mom soon started inviting him to come down for dinner every day.

The dinner table with Xu Tuo always had a pleasant and gentle atmosphere. He was like a longtime friend of my family, who naturally blended in as easily as water mixes with water. I called him Brother Xu, my parents called him Xiao Xu, and he often helped us fix our computers and install routers.

If I didn't tell anyone that he was a tenant, he looked just like my brother.

At dinner, Dad would turn on the TV and we'd all eat while listening to the news or something. There had been a murder last week, and one the week before that. The methods were brutal and didn't leave many clues.

Seriously, in all the years my family had lived in this district, we'd never heard of anything like this happening in the neighborhood.

My dad opened a can of beer and handed Xu Tuo another, "I only know that there was a murder case in the old town two years ago ...... It's been so scary lately, I feel that I have to drive to pick up Xueming from school, but he thinks it's embarrassing."

"Well, boys this age they don't like to be picked up and dropped off from class by their parents."

"Yeah, well, in that case, boys should be self-reliant." My dad muttered, "It's just that sometimes the school is late and the parents are unsettled."

"--How about I stop by and pick you up, Xueming?" Xu Tuo asked me, "I'm off from work at the company, and it's on the way to you after school."

And that was how things were settled.

If I had a late dismissal from school that day, he would come by and pick me up from school and go home with me. If my classmates asked me who that was, I could say it was my neighbor's older brother.

If I went home with Xu Tuo, I could buy some snacks at the supermarket on the way. We didn't really have anything in common, so when we were together, he asked me how I was studying, what I want to volunteer in, and then he'd mention the employment problems related to that type of volunteering. Xu Tuo clearly had no common topics for me, but he tried.

Problems soon arose, though.

That day at the convenience store, he bought me fried chicken and a Coke. We ate in the convenience store's dining area before heading back so we wouldn't get nagged by my mom.

It was dark outside, and the lights in the store were the brightest source of light in the neighborhood. The residents of this district were in a hurry because of the murders, and there were far fewer people traveling at night.

Xu Tuo lowered his head and handed me the can, and then suddenly said, "Xueming, are you being bullied at school?"

I froze, realizing to the strangulation marks that were on my neck were visible.

"The shirt was too small and the neckline was too tight." I said, giving him the generic answer. It was the same perfunctory excuse I'd been telling my parents all these years. Mom and Dad didn't think much of it; boys grow up fast, and clothes that fit a year ago might not fit today.

I would also try to grow my hair a little longer to hide the strangles under my ears.

"Tell me if you get bullied."

"Why? Do you have a solution?" I laughed, "Like The Yakuza?"

"Adults have adult solutions."

Xu Tuo's gaze was still on my strangulation marks. Then, I heard him say words that sent chills down my back.

"--That's not caused by your shirt collar being too tight." He said softly, "Are you being bullied? Or are you trying to kill yourself?"

I stared at him.

At times like this, one was always tempted to say something trashy as a comeback, such as "It's none of your business," "I pulled it too hard when I put on my shirt," "I hurt myself with a prop when I was rehearsing for the school play. "......

But perhaps it was the displeasure of my secrets being pried into, so I desperately observed everything about him, trying to find points where I could strike back at him instead.

The Xu Tuo in front of me, the IT company programmer, looked younger than his actual age - fair skin, tall and well-proportioned, kind personality, well groomed, and because of his good looks, many old aunts in the neighborhood inquired about his relationship status ......

This was a frustrating discovery, because I realized that what I knew about Xu Tuo, just like me without the "death experience" part of me, seem ordinary and boring.

There had to be something ...... he must have something that I could hold on to. Everyone had their own little black secret, Did he have a disease like hepatitis? Was he a homo? Did he secretly like women's clothes? Maybe he was missing a ball? ......

No one could be that squeaky clean, I knew he must have hidden the most colorful part of himself.

Immediately afterward, I found it though.

"That stain on your collar, is it blood?" I said, "Blood dries quite distinctly on black clothes, and these little stains are clumped together and dark, so I think it's blood. You ......"

Blood on the collar? That could be nosebleeds, coughing up blood, gingivitis, fights ...... I was stuck for a second, not knowing which one to pick. There were two small stains on the collar of his black shirt, so small I couldn't even be sure if they were blood or something else.

With a soft thud, the can in my hand was pressed by him on the table. Xu Tuo smiled at me. It was a peculiar smile, think of a patchwork avatar, where you put smiling eyes and a smiling mouth on a blank face, but you know that it's got a blank base.

"How about we play a game?" He said, "Xueming, let's exchange secrets."

"I don't have any secrets."

"No, you have to play." He said as he took me by the shoulders and led me out of the convenience store with a strength I had no way of breaking, "Your secret should be interesting. Your dad's a cop, and it has to be a secret he can't even find out, I'd be proud of knowing your secret. "

The streets were deserted and I felt nervous. I wasn't sure if I should struggle or yell. He led me through the city park, which was the opposite direction of home.

"The first day I got to your house, I thought you were a very strange child." He whispered, "What do boys that age like? Soccer, basketball, women's boobs, orchestra, physics experiments, playing games, the Fast and Furious series ...... I prepared myself mentally that maybe the landlord's family would have a noisy kid that people like me hate. However you were the complete opposite of what I expected. I don't see your hobbies."

"And what about you? What do you like?"

"We agreed to exchange secrets. You can't ask me to give you my secrets without an equal exchange."

Without realizing it, we had walked a long way and stopped under a bridge underpass. This was the place where the first recent murder case had taken place.

Xu Tuo took me by the shoulders. He was clearly curious about my reaction, "I thought you'd yell and run away. Aren't you afraid?"

"Should I be afraid?"

I asked the question sincerely.

Because of my obsession with death, I was numb to the normal sources of fear in the human world. But it still sounded a bit provocative, and Xu Tuo sighed and led me towards the darkness below the bridge.

At this point, I stopped in my tracks. I felt like I should announce my first secret, just to make this impasse easier. After all, I had an English quiz tomorrow, and I had to go home and catch up on homework and memorize my vocabulary.

"Do you like the feeling of dying?" I asked.

At the sound of the words, Xu Tuo's body in the darkness jerked around and looped something like a thin rope around my neck, tightening it viciously. His technique was quick and skillful, and it all happened in the flash of a few seconds.

To be continued

--------------

#death addiction mtl #death addiction #亡瘾 #扶他柠檬茶

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skiyoosmi · 4 years ago

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if fate permits

⤷ chapter twenty four: just one last time

prev < masterlist > next

Was I such an evil person in my past life to deserve this agony?

The damned question circles your mind over and over again as you walk mindlessly, vision blurry due to the tears that were continuously welling up your eyes. You've always thought watching him fall in love with someone else was already painful enough, but even that couldn't prepare you for the wrenching feeling that your heart felt when you cut the thread, forced to cut him out of your life, figuratively and literally speaking. Now that you're experiencing it yourself, you think that's the reason why people like you were forced to forget— the feeling of your heart endlessly falling to the dark abyss was not something anyone could live with for the rest of their lives, wondering what was so wrong with you that he couldn't bring himself to love you even with a thread physically connecting the two of you.

Stupid gods, they can't even do one thing right. His words echo and you choke out what seems like a pathetic attempt for a laugh, lips wobbling as you cry, "I know right, Tsum. They're so stupid."

Soulmates are so stupid. Your eyes linger on your thread, barely red as it began to become duller each hour that passed and had uneven ends due to the cutting that happened just a while ago. The red string, once bright and glowing in color, that kept you close to Atsumu for so many years, gone in just a few seconds and it felt so unfair, so cruel. Because how could someone decide your fate just like that?

You just have to get through it tonight, YN. Tomorrow, when you wake up, you won't even know that kind of heartbreak. Tomorrow, you repeat to yourself, trying to lessen the gut wrenching feeling swimming inside you; keyword, tried. Still, it doesn't stop the liquids that gather in your eyes and the hiccups that escape your mouth. Because you just loved him so goddamn much that you were willing to give up everything of you just for him, just for his happiness... and yet, he couldn't do it for you, not even one bit of him. And with that, you find yourself drowning in self-pity— no matter how much you sacrificed, no matter how long you put him first, it all still ended with you cutting the thread, the thing you treasured the most. It just wasn't meant to be.

The ringing of your phone resonates through the quiet and unknown park you had stopped by, the picture of your brother popping up on the screen.

"YN. Where in the hell are you? It's already late! Your flight's tomorrow night. Mom's close to losing the last bits of her mind. Tell me whe—"

"'Yoomi," you sob like a child, the minimal strength that kept you standing up finally giving in to your overwhelming emotions as your legs gave out as well, falling on your butt as you clutched your chest in pain, "'Yoomi."

You tried to get words out but your heavy cries stopped you from doing so, only being able to speak out his name.

"YN? What happened? Hey... take a deep breath and tell me where you are, I'll come get you myself and then we can talk about it, yeah?"

The usual monotonous voice he spoke vanished into thin air and was replaced with one that were filled with worry and concern. From the background, you can hear him telling your parents to just stay still, despite their sound of disapprovals, accompanied by the jiggling of keys which you figure were for the car, "YN, tell me where you are. Please."

"I... I..." you hiccup, looking around you for any prominent signs or landmarks, "I'm in a random park and t-there's a convenience store across. The one that we first went to when we moved to Tokyo."

"Okay. Just stay right there. I'm coming."

Kiyoomi takes a deep breath, lightly knocking on your bedroom door, sighing in relief when you responded with a quiet 'come in,' voice muffled. It has been past an hour since you arrived home, your parents opting to leave you alone as soon as they saw your swollen eyes; although, your brother couldn't obviously just sit still and look pretty, not when you're feeling like this when you're leaving tomorrow. He pushes the door open, wincing at the mess that welcomed him— some of your clothes were still not packed, luggages were lying down on the floor and there you were, on the bed, face down and shoved to the pillow.

"Did a storm pass by?" He asks, trying to at least lighten the mood, sitting at the foot of the bed and beginning to fix your things for you. He knew better than to pry, especially when he already had a guess on who brought you in such a devastated state. Instead of replying, you hold your hand up, he can see it for himself anyway.

His usually-calm demeanor breaks as he saw your thread, now in a dark maroon color. He stood up so quick that he felt lightheaded, "YN!"

Your head turns to him, eyes watering once more as you sob, "'Yoomi... I feel dead. Like my heart was forcefully ripped out of my chest. I... I don't know what to do... I can't take this."

He approaches you, engulfing your form in a hug, whispering his comforts as he speaks a gazillion of curses to Atsumu in his mind. He swears he might just punch the blonde to death as soon as he sees him, "You'll be okay. We're here. You're gonna be fine."

"I... I don't want to forget him... Please don't take him away from me... I love him," you cry out to the gods above, praying so desperately even if you knew it was impossible. You were no one special, who were you to be graced with such a miracle? And yet here you were, weeping the same prayers over and over again, knowing deep inside that no matter how much you beg, even if you were already on your knees, tomorrow would still come— the tomorrow that has no Miya Atsumu in it.

At that moment, you wished you hadn't just befriended him, you wished you just left him alone when he was playing with your brother; because nothing could compare to the pain of losing all of him— your soulmate, your beloved, your best friend— in just a matter of seconds.

Kiyoomi finishes packing for you by the time you calmed down a bit and leaves you alone, speaking about you should rest for your flight. As if you could do that... the moment you close your eyes, it's really over because the next time you open them, it's going to be a new YN. Gone will be you who knew each and every part of him, replaced with someone who won't even be able to recognize him...

Yet despite your heart's refusal towards the truth, your mind contradicts it and thinks back to his previous words, "...it has been too long of waiting..."

With that, your resolve crumbles into pieces and you find your eyes fluttering close. Somehow, you give out a small and sad smile, heart aching because of him... just one last time.

I'm sorry for not keeping my promise, Atsumu.

note. no words just... tears up because the next one might just be sadder than this

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu smau #atsumu x reader #iwaizumi x reader #atsumu headcanons #iwaizumi headcanons #atsumu smau #iwaizumi smau #haikyuu angst #haikyuu fics #haikyuu writings #miya atsumu #iwaizumi hajime

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mermaidsirennikita · 2 years ago

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honestly to the point where I just don't want to see a cis man write anything about women experiencing sexual/gendered violence at all, actually

like for sure there are some who've done it well but they do not make up for the ones who don't and the difference between a man writing a woman's suffering and a woman writing it is so stark

for example, last weekend hotd featured a (entirely unnecessary, not even in the source material) forced unmedicated c-section to communicate how difficult the world is for women... when the reality is that game of thrones doing the exact same shit for eight seasons didn't seem to make men any more sympathetic to our issues, and additionally just told us shit we already know

like if you're a woman--cis or otherwise--you know that being a woman sucks. I know I got paid about $10k less than a guy who got hired after me with my same qualifications, I know that my right to a safe and legal abortion is up in the air (as is my right to safe and legal birth control, if we're being real), I know that when I get my IUD removed and re-inserted my doctors just don't give me medication for the pain just like last time because I can take it and apparently my pain doesn't matter, I know that every time I walk home alone at night I'm risking sexual assault (or worse), and I know that every time I go to a bar I should probably keep my drink with me at all times because it could end up being drugged. Among other things

the contrast was especially, again, stark to me when I watched bad sisters, a show adapted and written by a woman (sharon horgan, and to be clear it is early days). the series is focused on the fallout of four sisters POSSIBLY killing the fifth's abusive husband, with half the plot being flashbacks to when he was alive. so abuse is central to the story. he is intimidating, belittling, cruel to every single one of the sisters--but somehow, this show doesn't feel like a study in reminding us that ooh yes, women are outlets for men's abusive tendencies.

for one thing, there is no hollow feminism--there is not the weak "I deserve better as a woman" rhetoric we often see men write into dialogue without writing into plot or character. these women are unnerved by him, and even the most career-focused, empowered of them is shaken by his taunts about her infertility, because yes, she is powerful and strong and all those things, but she did happen to want a baby and it hurts her when he makes digs about it. she is allowed to be vulnerable and hurt about that, and snap and decide "nah, I'm done with this shit". so much of his abusive is verbal and emotional--at the point that I've watched, he hasn't hit his wife, and I'm not sure he will onscreen based off reviews I've seen. I can't help but feel that many shows written by men make physical abuse so brutal, to the point that the way it's shot feelings borderline loving, luxuriating in split lips and black eyes, as if we do not know that is what is happening. I've yet to see this man hit his wife--but I know he probably has, and I know that it truly doesn't matter if he did or didn't because either way she is having the life sucked out of her, her ties to her family severed, her ability to parent her own child taken away from her, her options strangled by a man who just wants her to be his and nothing else. I am a woman in this world, and I do not need to see a woman being "battered" to know that she is battered.

and all of this is done with an edge of humor, because the show is a black comedy, and to be frank that also rings true. women do face daily obstacles and just have to kind of go "welp" and move the fuck on and keep earning and supporting ourselves and doing what we can to give ourselves options because very few people hand them to us in the same way that they are often handed to men, and you can't just grind to a halt because, say, the Supreme Court just took your rights away. even if you want to. you do kind of have to fucking joke about it, because often life does feel like a joke.

and I should add--bad sisters is focused on a group of white, cis women and I do not want to imply that this doesn't give them (us) a leg up over trans women and women of color. of course this deeply affects their status.

but regardless of the type of woman I'm watching, at this point I basically need cis men to largely stay in the kiddie pool when it comes to depicting women's issues. and frankly? in general, I'm all for watching women fight and claw, but I'm ready for stories that featured more happiness than suffering.

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phantomrose-dump · 3 years ago

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some headcanons of my oc you've probably never asked for but i'm posting it anyway pt. 2

i'm back with another set of headcanons for my oc oribel! i added some canon parts from the game so this might be considered as semi-canon. tagging @solomons-cooking bcs u want to know more about my baby ><

- oribel's room is kinda messy, mostly filled with stuff she collects for her hobbies and never touches them. she does clean her room sometimes, and you'll notice that she organizes things pretty well. even if her room's messy or clean, her eye collection always stands out no matter what.

- even after learning mc's connection with lilith, she won't change the way she treats them. she will treat them just as kindly and remind them that they are their own person, and just because they were somehow related to their sister doesn't mean she has to treat them like they were lilith.

- she's the only sibling who knows about belphie's whereabouts and tried to talk to the both sides. seeing that lucifer and belphie wouldn't change their minds with her words alone, she warned them about the future instead.

- secretly tries to lessen mammon's debt by going to some of the witches he's indebted with. she also knows about the human child and sends money to the witches who takes care of them as well.

- levi once asked her to join the navy but she refused. he was confused and angry at first, going on about how oribel didn't want to be with her 'yucky otaku brother', but when he remembered her fear of the ocean he apologized to her non-stop. he still does up to the present even after being convinced that it was fine.

- oribel goes with asmo whenever he goes shopping, helping him choose some matching outfits and make ups. she carries some of his stuff sometimes and secretly buys something for him too. she goes to the club with him too, making sure he can go home when he's too drunk.

- she always makes sure that everyone's okay; that beel isn't always too hungry, that belphie is always well rested, that mammon doesn't steal often, that satan doesn't go overboard with his pranks on luci, that asmo goes home even if he's drunk, that levi still sleeps and that luci gets a break from his work sometimes.

- despite being a demon, her alcohol tolerance is quite low. because of this, she doesn't drink often in public. when she tried drinking once, she became drunk easily that she started crying and complaining on how unfair the curse on her was.

- speaking of her curse, it is kinda complicated. she should only do small things to prevent something bad happening. if she makes drastic changes about/choose to ignore something in the present that may affect the future, her curse will activate, making her go 'blind'. her irises will disappear, leaving her eyes completely white. sometimes she'll feel the pain she felt from their fall as if their father was there to constantly remind her about everything in the past.

- oribel was once put in charge of taking care of the cherubs, and she was quite experienced in dealing with children. she cares for luke the same way she does to the little angels back in the celestial realm, maybe that was why he's attached to her.

- she has a pact with solomon, and she somehow trusts him although she knows how shady the sorcerer was.

- oribel knows how to make art both traditionally and digitally. she painted a lot back at the celestial realm, ranging from portraits of her siblings, self-portraits and sceneries. she painted a portrait of their family before, and simeon kept it for her after they fell. she has an art page on devilgram and does art collaborations with levi sometimes.

- she visited the human realm with lilith a few times before, and she even got to know her lover. she saw that he was kind and loving to her older sister and it was enough for her to know that lilith was happy with the human.

- while falling, oribel saw a vision of lilith 'dying'. she assumed lilith was dead when she woke up in the devildom, yet she learned the truth after seeing another vision.

- if you hear metal clashing against each other underneath the demon lord's castle, it's probably oribel and barbatos sparring whenever they have free time.

- oribel helps simeon writing tsl, knowing that it was referenced to them. she does check the different outcomes in the future and rereads the whole story before publishing. soon after, she became a co-author of 'christopher peugeot' under the name of 'crystal peugeot'.

- as one of the avatars of sin, oribel has her own familiars too. her banner has a fox symbol and her color theme is light blue.

#obey me #obey me!#obey me! swd #om! swd #obey me! shall we date?#obey me swd #obey me shall we date #om swd #obey me oc #obey me oc headcanons #obey me oribel

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jesuiscalmedammit · 4 years ago

Text

In The Dark – (1) Pilot chapter || [Din Djarin x reader]

“What are you doing down here?”

Letting out an annoyed groan, you put your hands on your hips and turned around to look at your host. “Looking for some clothes that aren’t soaking in my blood.”

You expected him to tell you where to find something to wear but he didn’t move. At all. Knowing him, not talking wasn’t surprising, but being this still was quite alarming. Had you crossed a line by going through his things? Well, it surely wasn’t polite but you were really just looking for clothes. Under different circumstances, he probably wouldn’t have a problem with that, but this was a special situation and you didn’t know when he would figure out the truth about you. Until then you were just a stranger to him.

When you saw his head move a little, indicating that he took a good look at your body, you finally realized what was wrong: you were in your underwear. Not seeing his face made it difficult to figure out what he was thinking about. Was he embarrassed? Shy? Confused? Or was his mind full of dirty thoughts? You hated being in the dark. You were used to it, but it didn’t mean you were comfortable with it. And then more silence followed and you began to feel anxious out of the blue. Would you finally say something?

“I should take a look at your wounds. I have a feeling you couldn’t really reach the one on your back,” he suddenly said.

Even though his voice wasn’t perfectly clear because of the helmet, you could still tell it was neutral. The fact you were almost naked apparently didn’t bother him. That was good. He clearly wasn’t planning to take advantage of the situation, although you had never really assumed he was that kind of man to begin with. Why it didn’t bother him, though, was a mystery, and for a moment you began to think about the possible reasons. Was he that experienced? Or was he just absolutely not interested in this kind of stuff?

In the end, you scratched the back of your neck to avert your thoughts. “Thanks, that would be great.” Nodding, he left for a short while to find what he needed to help then pointed at a big metal box. Once you sat down, he pulled something to sit on behind you and you heard him pack out the equipment. “Did you leave the little guy up there?”

“Yeah, but he’ll be fine.”

“You sure?” you asked as you pointed at the small creature who stood almost right in front of you. “He looks pretty interested in what we’re doing down here.”

An exasperated sigh escaped his lips before he moved to pick up the kid and put him somewhere he could keep an eye on him. “Stay here, okay?” he said before walking back to you. “Why do I have a feeling he’s gonna be a handful?”

“He’s still a child, that’s what they’re the best at.”

“I guess this means you have experience with them.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at the thought of this. “Oh, no, I usually try to avoid them,” you clarified.

The silence that followed your words made it quite obvious he was giving you a strange look under that shiny helmet of his. But once he cleared his throat, he returned to his previous spot behind you and you soon felt his gloved finger tracing your skin as he tried to figure out which bloodstain was covering an actual wound on your back.

Then he suddenly stopped, you felt another finger on your skin, and he said, “This wound is really nasty so I’ll have to clean and stitch it.” You nodded and waited while he picked up whatever he needed to do that. “Since it’s pretty deep, the cleaning part will hurt, but try to stay still, okay?”

When he put his palm on your stomach, you knew he only did it because he wanted to make sure you didn’t move around much from the stinging pain that awaited you. Despite knowing this, your body reacted without your brain’s consent and you let out a quiet hiss as you tried to move your upper body away from him.

“I’m sorry, I–”

“No, it’s the vambrace,” you told him quickly, hoping he would understand that your reaction didn’t mean you found this inappropriate in any way. “It’s pretty cold, for some reason I wasn’t expecting it.”

“Oh.” You heard him stand up so you turned around to see what he was doing. Apparently, he decided to wrap the metal piece into some cloth he found and you were honestly grateful for him being this thoughtful. Others would have probably told you to stop whining. The next time he touched you, you didn’t even feel the cold metal anymore. “Better?”

“Yeah.”

“Great. You ready?”

Your pain threshold was high and you were used to pain, but this… This stinging feeling was the worst part of treating open wounds. Though you cursed under your breath and instinctively tried to get out of his hold, Mando held you firmly enough to keep you relatively still. Seconds felt like hours, and you were only snapped out of your thoughts by his soothing voice.

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay. Just try to take deep breaths. I’ll quickly stitch and bandage it then we’re done,” he said, waiting for you to nod before doing anything else.

The rest of the treatment was bearable and you didn’t move around that much anymore. When he finished, you turned around to be face-to-face with him. “Thank you. For everything,” you told him with a smile.

“Well, you helped us escape and they blew up your ship because of this so that’s the least I could do.”

Oh, your ship. Being around Mando again made you forget about that tiny little detail. Which wasn’t exactly tiny considering you had to travel somehow. You couldn’t just settle down at some randomly chosen place. But you had time to worry about that later, this is why you decided to learn about his plans first. “Where are you going now?”

“I don’t really know yet,” he began with a sigh as he looked over at the kid. “I guess somewhere remote because we need to lie low for a while. Hopefully, they’ll stop searching for us soon.”

These guys stopping soon? Everybody was looking for this child, and the bounty on its head was high enough to keep them interested until the end. But you didn’t want to make him feel bad now so you decided to keep your opinion to yourself. A part of you was sure he had already known that, though, because he was everything but an idiot.

“Is something wrong?”

“Oh, no, I'm sorry,” you said as you looked back at him. “I just got lost in my thoughts for a moment.”

A low, humming sound left his throat. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“It's just…” How could you tell him? He wasn’t about to figure it out on his own so you had to tell him the truth. But it was hard. Then again, you wanted a normal conversation which meant he had to know. Once you let out a long sigh, you decided to get it over with. “I didn't know the voice modulator in my helmet worked so well that you wouldn’t recognize my voice without it.”

“What are you talking about?”

You couldn’t help but laugh. “We've known each other for a long time, Mando. I like to think of you as my only friend in the Tribe.”

This was the moment when he finally understood what was going on. When silence fell between you again, it wasn’t the same as before. You weren’t uncertain about what he was thinking about, you knew it perfectly well. And as you waited for him to say something, you couldn’t hide your wide, happy grin.

“Is it really you?” he asked cautiously. When you nodded, he stood up and began pacing in front of you. “But how? They all died.”

“I wasn’t there when it happened. By the time I returned, they were already gone. That's the only reason why I helped the two of you because I knew it was you, Mando.”

“Where’s your armor?”

It was a perfectly understandable question, after all, you hadn’t been wearing it when you met again. “It was on my ship but it doesn't matter anymore. I'm done with that life. I don’t need reminders of the past,” you informed him once your smile disappeared from your lips.

“Why?” Since you didn’t know how to answer, you shrugged. “So what, you want to settle down now?”

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

Once again you wished you could see his face under the helmet. But he was so loyal to the Tribe’s rules that you knew he wouldn’t take it off in someone else’s presence. So what could he be thinking? Was he happy? Was he mad at you? Could he hate you for not telling him sooner? Did he despise you for leaving your armor behind? And why was he so silent? Just say something. Anything!

“I still can’t believe it’s you,” he said quietly, finally breaking the silence.

Tilting your head to the side, you glanced over at the child who was still watching the two of you. “And I can’t believe you became a single dad.”

“I’m no–” He fell silent when he followed your gaze and looked at the little guy. “Maybe you’re right.”

“Do you what’s the best thing about this beskar armor of yours? I saw the pile of armors and immediately knew you were probably still alive,” you admitted out of nowhere.

“I saw the pile and thought you were dead,” he replied without hesitation and you could’ve sworn he sounded sad and maybe even a little relieved. He took a deep breath then went on. “I kind of understand why you want to leave that life behind. With all those rules we follow it’s… easy to become jealous of average people and their simple lives.”

“It’s not just that. Having to wear that helmet all the time makes it hard to do certain things.”

He thought about what you said but didn’t ask what you meant right away. But when he realized you weren’t about to elaborate on your own, he asked, “Did you fall in love with someone?”

“It’s not–It’s complicated,” you said, trying really hard not to tell him the truth. You wanted to be honest, but definitely not this honest. You had been in love with someone way before this tragedy happened, although he didn’t have to know that.

“All right, I won’t ask,” he said eventually. “Look, I have something for the pain, but it will probably knock you out. Do you want some?”

Sleeping sounded nice. This conversation turned pretty awkward pretty fast, but this way you would have some time to come up with a believable explanation. And you could also figure out what to do next. You didn’t have a ship. You had nowhere to go. It wasn’t an easy situation. “Yeah, that would be great.”

note: i don’t know if i’ll continue this one or not, we’ll see. i just... had this idea and couldn’t get it out of my head. also, i haven’t started s2 yet because i want to binge-watch s1 and s2 together. so yeah, don’t think much about the timeline. || feedback is always appreciated. || sorry for the possible typos, errors etc.

#din djarin #din djarin x reader #din djarin imagine #the mandalorian #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian imagine

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jungleslut101 · 4 years ago

Text

I'm taking you home little lamb.

Summary- The deputy has been MIA for 3 months and the seeds take matters in their own hands when everyone else come back without their lost lamb.

__________________

The last everyone heard or seen the deputy was when she was taking out one of Jacobs wolf beacon. That was 3 months ago, no one has heard about her after that, even though it's been better for the cult,Joseph won't stop begging his brothers to go and look for their lamb together.

Which is why they are walking through a deep forest in the cold autumn weather. One of Jacobs men reported that there's been sight of the deputy deep in these woods.

After walking around 10 miles they come upon an abandoned rusted cabin. They slowly head for the door, hearing no sounds they doubt she's here but it's worth to check. John carefully opens the cracked door with Jacobs rifle pointed at it and Joseph's pistol in hand just for precaution.

They can slightly see inside pass the threshold but still no sight of the lamb."I'll go first just incase there are traps" Jacob whispers and they both nod

"Be careful brother and don't hurt her if you find her" Joseph whispers back. The brothers give him a weird look.

Jacob walks in checking inside each room he passes until he approaches the messy kitchen connected to the living room. He approaches where he can see a fire place just barely staying lit with a couch facing it. Either some one is here or been here.

Jacob stops dead in his tracks when he sees the woman who's been ruining their lives for the past 6 months sleeping soundly on the couch with blankets covering her lower half. He must be hallucinating there's no way he caught the she devil this easily, this must be a really good trap or a really sick joke either way he slowly takes coordinated steps towards her but she still doesn't stir even slightly.

Jacob reaches for his receiver radioing his brothers. "She's here" he whispers. After a minute John and Joseph find their way to the leaving room seeing their brother kneeling beside the couch.

"Come here,slowly" they both comply but no one prepared them for the image In front of them. They're little lamb sleeping on the couch looking so innocent.

"Who would've believe she's the devil who's brought havoc upon years of hard work" John scoffed making Jacob chuckle and Joseph giving them both side glares.

"I can feel the heat coming off her body " Joseph deliberately starts moving his hands towards her face just touching her cheek with a feathers touch. "She looks so harmless and angelic" he makes himself chuckle a bit Jacob and John watching his movements like a hawks eye finding it a little unusual that their brother act this kind towards her after everything she did. "Let's take our little lamb home" Joseph moves some of her hair that has fallen on her face behind her ear making her stir and wake.

Rook doesn't acknowledge her surroundings immediately but when she does see her 3 enemy's she's been trying to rid of for so long all looking at her she jolts upright from the couch making Joseph fall flat on his back with her sudden movement. Before she can reach the other side of the couch where she left her shotgun Jacob grabs her ankle making her fall on her stomach. The air gets knocked out of her so she turns while taking greedy gulps of air,but that is short lived when Jacob crushes her body with his own making her breath hitch again.

"And where do you think you're going so soon pup? We just found you" he grins down wolfishly at her making her tremble from fear.

"Jake your scaring our dearest deputy get off the poor girl for fuck sake" John couldn't hide the excitement from his voice which made her more nervous.

"Brother John is right we don't want to scare our lamb back in to hiding" Jacob slowly removed his weight from her but he still had her trapped with his thighs on either side of her hips and a little weight on her pelvic region.

She whimpered a little, her mind still hazy from sleep. Maybe she was having a nightmare this can't be real. Jacob shifts his weight a little making her moan in discomfort. Not realising she's only wearing panties and a loose Metallica shirt making her legs and thighs bare for their prying eyes.

She's getting a little flustered so she bucks her hip to try and escape from Jacobs hold which has Jacob lose his balance and almost crush her with his weight if it wasn't for his fast reflexes, holding himself up with his palms flat next to her head. "Careful kitten" his tone is low and predatory, she can feel his hot breath on her face making her stomach churn.

"Get the fuck off me seed" she bucks her hip with more strength this time hitting her stomach with his making both of them gasp unintentionally. Her from pain him from surprise.

"My child calm yourself we're not here to hurt you"

"Shut the fuck up hipster Jesus and you ginger fuck I told you to get off of me"

She glares at Joseph then at Jacob whose expression is still shocked

"My my deputy who knew such vile words could come from someone like you" John laughs.

"Johnny quiet for once, I think the deputy has something to tell us huh pup isn't that right ?" He gives her that damn smirk again.

"I have nothing to tell you fucking peggies now Get Off!"

"What are you talking about Jake" John asks with curiosity.

"Well since our dear lamb won't share with the family I will." He carefully flattens his hand on her stomach where he can feel a bump there." Our deputy has a little pup on the way isn't that right?" He laughs manically. He wasn't sure at first when the baby bump hit him in his abdomen but now that he touched it his 100% sure.

Joseph gasps "What are you talking about brother? Do you mean she's pregnant" Jacob nods still rubbing rook's baby bump.

She starts getting flustered again and this time she thrashes to get the mountain Man off. John looks dumbfounded but snaps himself out of it when he sees her struggle. " Jake you should probably get off of her. You're stressing her out." Jacob nods and slowly gets off of her making her exhale the long breath she's been holding in.

"Don't fucking act like it's your asshole."

"Hmm of course my dear but if I may who exactly is the father of your unborn child? I hope you at least keep count of the many sins you commit" his statement makes rook laugh madly.

"Oh Johnny, I'll let your brother do the math on that one" John furrows his brows then looks at Jacob making her laugh more "oh no honey don't look at him. Look at your other brother, the holiest man of all, The Father." They all turn to Joseph to see him pale with his mouth agape. "Ohh he didn't tell you? Well you see after a month into the fighting, your brother radioed me, asking to meet him at where all of it started so we can put an end to it. At first I wasn't gonna go cause like who's dumb enough to go, well I was I thought I was gonna go kill him which would make it easier for the resistance to take back the county. But when I got to the church and I saw the Holly man himself shirtless with sweat coating his skin something snapped or maybe I was just too horny." She heard Jacob chuckle "Anyway one thing led to another the next thing we knew he was fucking me on his Pulpit, the Holy man fucking the heathen in the place of God, The place where he gives his sermons to his beloved children The Father fucking me all raw and roug.."

"I've Heard Enough!" Joseph yelled making her stop talking. "You know my dear rook you didn't have to go into details." He kneeled Infront of her taking her head in between his calloused hands. "You should've told me you were carrying my child I would've--"

"You would've what Joseph huh? All you were gonna do is put a huge target on my back. You know what will happen if the resistance find out I'm carrying one of the greatest cult leaders child, they'll find me and rip the child out of me while I'm still conscious."

"You think I would let that happen, you think any of us would let someone near the mother of my child. Do you think this wickedly of me? " Joseph sounded sad which made rook a little sad.

"Get up my dear we're taking you to my bunker where it's safe" John chirped in all happy and excitedly. "After all can't have the mother of my brother's child in danger."

"He's right pup you already look weak and malnourished. If you want the baby coming out healthy and well you need to be somewhere stress free and safe."

"I'm fine right where I am, it's safe here"

"Not anymore my little lamb. I'm sorry but I'm gonna take you to one of my brothers bunkers whether you like it or not. I prefer it be willingly" she looked at him for a while looking for anything in his expression but nothing just that cool calm face he always wore. She nodded making them all sigh in relief. "John,Jacob please go pack everything our rook has, the sooner we get to the bunkers the better." They both nodded and got to work.

Joseph slowly brought his hand up and layed it on her stomach were he could feel the bump. She gasped not expecting him to do that. "I didn't know I was pregnant you know. But after 2 months in to it Kim was the one who told me I was showing the signs she experienced so she gave me a test. I was hoping for it to come back negative but something in the deepest part of my heart also hoped for it to come as positive" she laughed with tears perked up in her eyes some falling free even though she tried hard not to let them.

He caressed her stomach with light touches not realising his eyes was also welling up with tears. She brought her hands to his cheek wiping the tears that came free something that was too intimate for them both but somehow felt right. Joseph brought his forehead to hers closing his eyes just enjoying the moment.

Not knowing what she was doing she touched her lips to his so lightly that he barely felt it. When he didn't pull away she deepened the kiss a little making him grab her neck with his other hand that wasn't rubbing her stomach to deepen it even more. This didn't feel wrong at all. Maybe the baby would be the sign of hope in this hell. The hope everyone needed.

"Let's take you home little lamb"

The End.

#Joseph seed/female deputy #john seed #jacob seed #female character #unplanned pregnancy #hurt/comfort #Fluff #Mentoin of smut

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bulkyphrase · 3 years ago

Text

Everybody & the Avengers Team

I've got a new fic rec list for you!

The stories in the "X & the Avengers Team" tags focus on one person's relationship to the Avengers team as a whole. Courtesy of AO3's tag browse and Excel, here's a ranked list of the top 20 most popular pairings:

Tony Stark | 2470 total, 240 OTP

Peter Parker | 2255 total, 85 OTP

Steve Rogers | 602 total, 56 OTP

Loki | 387 total, 26 OTP

Natasha Romanov | 308 total, 35 OTP

Clint Barton | 268 total, 46 OTP

Bruce Banner | 244 total, 15 OTP

Thor | 209 total, 7 OTP

Avengers Team | 174 total, 24 OTP

James "Bucky" Barnes | 156 total, 7 OTP

Wanda Maximoff | 143 total, 4 OTP

Phil Coulson | 105 total, 9 OTP

Darcy Lewis | 91 total, 6 OTP

Matt Murdock | 60 total, 8 OTP

Sam Wilson | 53 total, 5 OTP

Nick Fury | 41 total, 5 OTP

Harry Potter | 40 total, 0 OTP

Pepper Potts | 31 total, 1 OTP

Vision | 29 total, 2 OTP

Stiles Stilinski | 25 total, 0 OTP

In chart form, if you like charts:

Notes:

The numbers after the names are the number of stories tagged with that ship. OTP means the number of stories where that is the only relationship tagged on the story. Numbers are accurate as of July 2021.

Story Recommendations

For your reading pleasure, included below is at least one fic rec for each pairing except the crossovers from non-Marvel fandoms (apologies to Mr. Potter & Mr. Stilinski). Most are gen fic, and even in the ones with a romantic pairing, romance is not the focus.

Tony Stark

As Subtle As Cognitive Recalibration by petroltogo (Teen, 8949) tumblr: @tonystarktogo

Standing inside his penthouse, listening to Rogers, Barton and Banner explain to Fury how they just happened to stumble over the Tesseract on a routine security check of Stark Tower’s roof and wouldn’t you know, they’ve managed to fight off the looming alien invasion before it could really start and secure the missing overpowered nightlight is one of the most surreal situations Tony has ever had the displeasure of experiencing.

Peter Parker

the worst field trip ever by shrill_fangirl_screaming (Teen, 3420) tumblr: @i-am-having-an-emotion

"We're on a field trip," Peter said. "To here. And Tony decided to be our tour guide and absolutely embarrass me, so can you please help get him under control?"

Which is how Peter Parker, architect of his own destruction, ended up with not one but two superhero pseudo-dads being annoying on his school field trip.

Steve Rogers

Do You Remember Being Happy? ('Cause I Sure Don't) by GalaxyThreads (Teen, 11022) tumblr: @galaxythreads

That seems about right. He doesn't know how he knows that, though. He does have vague memories of an annoyed fondness at finding peanut butter in some sort of jam. Thor's doing, because he doesn't see the point of using two knives when one works just as fine. He knows that. How does he know that? He knows all those little details, though, almost innately. How can he know these strangers so deeply?

Everyone else below the cut!

Loki

Proprietary by TheThirdMarauder (Teen, 7639)

No, Loki simply wants the Avengers conquered. The details of whom, how, and when matter not. Unless, of course, said details interfere with Loki's plans. Then, well, then none can fault him for protecting his own interests.

Loki has always been exceptionally good at lying to himself.

Natasha Romanov

What Girls Are Made Of by enigma731 (Teen, 4613) tumblr: @enigma731

She rolls her eyes but does as he’s indicated, using his shoulders to leverage herself up onto his back, her arms around his neck and her legs hugging his waist.

“You know,” he says blithely, “this isn’t really what I tend to picture when I think of a hot girl riding me.”

Natasha groans, deciding that if his sense of humor gets them arrested, she’ll kill him herself. “Just go.”

Clint Barton

Dear Clint Barton (circa age 7) by pollyrepeat (Teen, 4221)

With a normal person, this might count as blackmail material, but a) this is a case of mutually assured destruction if ever there was one, and b) Fury is immune to embarrassment. Not just in the regular, Tony Stark way, either, oh no. Things that could possibly end up being embarrassing to Fury get somehow warped and changed until they go from mortifying all the way over into useful and/or good for his image. It’s like a superpower.

Carrying Clint’s small child self around on his shoulders more than once has probably already hit the interagency rumour mill as an example of Fury’s innate awesomeness: good with rocket launchers and small children.

Also available as a podfic!

Bruce Banner

They're Not Wrong by Trumpeteer34 (Teen, 10163)

As Tony began to pace around the hole in the road to keep himself from shooting repulsors at the nearby buildings in a fit of rage, Thor began to study the nearby area. There was no sign of either the Hulk or Bruce Banner beyond the crater. The surrounding area, aside from the rubble of the fight, held no clue as to their friend’s location.

“Guys, he’s gone,” Tony growled into the communicator on their private line, drawing Thor out of his darkening thoughts. “Someone tranqed him and took him. He’s gone.”

Honorary mention goes to the Responsible Science series by @letteredlettered - the stories don’t have the "Avengers Team & Bruce Banner" tag, but they could, and they are amazing. The best Bruce Banner writing I've ever come across.

Thor

Fortunately, I Am Mighty by onward_came_the_meteors (General, 3062)

Steve was the first one to speak. “Are you okay?”

Thor nodded. Which was a bad idea, as it turned out, because now there were little gray lights flashing in front of his eyes. “I’m fine.” Absolutely everyone narrowed their eyes, and he added, “But, uh. Could we possibly not get back in the car just yet?”

Avengers Team

Civil Wasn't by onward_came_the_meteors (General, 7123)

"We're having an ideological conflict here," Tony stated with disbelief. "Are you telling me you still want to go out to dinner?"

"It's a standing engagement, Tony," Rhodey reminded him.

"Not you too—"

"We already had to reschedule from Friday when Natasha was..." Rhodey frowned. "What were you doing?"

The question was directed toward Natasha, who shrugged and said, "Spy stuff."

James "Bucky" Barnes

You Know How I Feel, aka, The Adventures of Bucky and Muffy the Dinosaur by ifeelbetter (Not Rated, 4511) tumblr: @ifeelbetterer

“As you may have heard, Bucky Barnes, a.k.a. The Winter Soldier, recently rescued a tiny part-robot dinosaur during the Avengers’ battle with Dr. Doom in Antarctica,” the other newscaster explained. “Pictures of Barnes and the dinosaur were posted on twitter by fellow Avenger, Clint Barton, a.k.a. Hawkeye, and immediately made Barnes’s new pet America’s sweetheart.”

“Her name’s Muffy,” said Steve."

Wanda Maximoff

and the woman was young again by Mira_Jade (General, 3669)

Tony Stark called them the Cap's Kooky Quintet, and sometimes the term amused her – causing her to lift a sardonic brow where someday a smile would truly smile. She enjoyed the presence of comrades – true comrades – and she enjoyed the way their minds wove and bound together about each other to fluctuate against her senses as one. There was something soothing about being in their midst, and even when their loud and brash ways – their painful Americaness - rubbed her raw and drained on her, it was ever the knitting of their minds that soothed those moments over, and made them inconsequential.

Phil Coulson

Coulson's First Day of School by storiesfortravellers (Teen, 3055)

Coulson looked up at him. “I like drawing pictures with Mr. Rogers. I like having tea parties with Ms. Potts. I like it when Dr. Banner reads me books, and I like it when Natasha teaches me things. And I like when you play with me. You do really good voices when we play action figures. And you’re the only one who lets me do stuff like jump off the high diving board at the pool or eat three cupcakes or play tackle with kids at the park.”

Clint didn’t realize that. He was pretty sure that meant that he was doing something wrong.

Darcy Lewis

Beginner Yoga for Dummies (Darcys) and Sad Hobos by chailover (Teen, 3434)

Darcy had a theory: crazy attracted crazy, working kind of like gravity. It was pretty much her explanation for her life after Thor. And if she had thought the type of crazy Thor attracted was bad, be it Loki or the Warrior Three and Sif, or the dark elves and the Convergence, it was still nothing against what the Avengers manage en masse.

Matt Murdock

Double Blind by smilebackwards (Teen, 2381) tumblr: @smilebackwards

Stark snaps his fingers. “You can’t see half of my inventions. This explains so much about you and why you’ve never been properly impressed by me.”

“Does it?” Matt says, ambiguously.

Sam Wilson

Bystander by scribblemetimbers (Teen, 52029)

“I just want you to know,” Sam says loudly, cautiously raising his hands, “That I’m very poor and very sleep-deprived and literally the only thing you can kill me for right now are my notes.” He pauses. Wait. On second thought: “Please don’t steal my notes.”

“I’m not—I’m not a mugger,” Not Mugger rasps out, and for all that he looks about to keel over and die, the man actually manages to sound offended.

Nick Fury

Bedtime Story by dixiehellcat (Teen, 2532) tumblr: @deehellcat

Fury snorted. “I have to check in with the duty officer. I’ll be back in, let’s say twenty minutes. I expect all of you to have whatever your pre-bedtime routines are completed, and be in here pajama’ed and ready to be read to.”

He tapped the book under his arm, then left with the usual dramatic swish of his long coat. Bruce scratched his head. “Did…he just say be ready to be read to?”

Pepper Potts

Pepper and the Avengers (Which She Knows Nothing About) by rebelmeg (General, 6696) tumblr: @rebelmeg

The Avengers, that mismatched group of hurt and heroism, was one of the most important things in Tony Stark’s life. So, naturally, Pepper had made them an important part of her life too.

Vision

039. Intoxicated by aimmyarrowshigh (Teen, 100) tumblr: @aimmyarrowshigh

It might be nice to fit in, just this once. To lose a bit of composure.

Vision floated over to the refrigerator and, with some timidity, pulled off a magnet. He stuck it to his forehead.

#marvel fic rec

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liddolwhynot2000 · 4 years ago

Text

Decisions Of a Capricorn

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Summary: Levi Ackerman woke up one fine morning. In the past. Shit.

Genre: Angst, lets-change-shit, drama, liddol romance (Levixhappiness)

Pairings: Levi/Original Female Character, Levi/Petra

Warning: Manga spoilers

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Chapter 1. Chapter 2

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Chapter 3: Brace

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Summary: Capricorns can be naturally pessimistic. They already expect unfortunate things to happen in life, so they take them in a stride.

Alternatively, Levi braces himself for the worst and is pleasantly suprised.

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Telling his squad had gone better then he thought it would. His special ops members took the news it in a stride, immediately launching into a discussion of what they needed to do now and how to utilize this information best. Eren, as expected of his 15 year old version, was befuddled.

Levi wondered how someone so innocent looking transformed into a complete monster in such short time.

His squad had lived up to his expectations, easily concluding that they need to keep this information to themselves for now. Eld, ever the natural born leader, took the lead and suggested that they need to learn to work with Eren. So that they aren't caught off guard on the bare minimum skill level they can expect from the traitor.

Gunther was the one who brought up the possibility of facing the armoured titan, and even though Levi was sure they wouldn't have to face that particular beast yet, he still agreed with their suggestions of carrying some fire arms. Thunder spears didn't exist yet, which meant that grenades and canons would be their best shot.

Eren had tried to voice out his own suggestion, that he wanted to train his skill set too. He felt that he needex to improve in some areas, and although Levi bitterly recalled how much Eren had improved without help in another life, he had to agree with the brat.

His squad, however, didn't share the same opinion and immediately began to shut Eren down.

'Eren, your job is to trust us. We expect you to leave it all to us and transform as an absolute last resort!'

'Yeah, you brat, don't get cocky. The only way you'll fight is if we somehow di-'

Olou had bitten his tounge and cut himself off before Levi could. Levi had then interrupted before Eld and Gunther could throw in their two cents.

'Eren is the main target, what will all of you do if Eren is somehow dragged away you from you and has to fight for himself? We need to prepare this brat for everything, especially how to fight in his titan form.'

They had all shut up, but he could tell it was only because of Eren's presence. They wouldn't be caught dead speaking speak out against their superior, especially in front of Eren. Levi had taken advantage of that little fact.

'We'll get back to this in a while-- Eren it's time for you to transform. Four eyes is here'

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It went just like last time, Eren wasn't able to transform. He sat in front of Levi, looking just as despondent he had the last time. He didn't walk away from Eren like last time, instead having chosen to stick close to the brat. Some things still needed to happen, and Levi was just waiting for that inevitable explosion.

When Eren accidentally transformed this time, he immediately took out his blades and points them at his team, not at all surprised that they had already drawn their blades.

They would always be talented little brats, but they had a long way to go..

'Captain-'

'Put down your blades Petra.'

'Captain get away from Eren-Please-'

It had continued on, with the brats arguing in favour of heatedly questioning Eren and his motives, while he had ferociously stood by the him. It was a part of the plan really-he knew that Eren would be fine no matter what. He just hoped that, at least this time around, the brat would take his taking a stand for him like this into consideration before he decided to launch a mass genocide on his own.

'Shut up and obey.'

His team had faltered, and then slowly lowered their swords as he began to speak.

'Do you have any other titan shifters?'

They all looked confused. Only Olou managed to speak croak out a strangled no. Levi pointed at Eren, who was panicking alot less since Levi had begun to speak in his favour.

'You see this dumbass? He's our only shot. There's no replacement for him. All of you can be replaced, Erwin can be replaced, Hange can be replaced. Despite your silly admiration of me, I could easily drop dead and be replaced too.-'

His squad had looked scandalised at the thought of their beloved captain being anything remotely close to being replaceable. Then again, none of them had experienced Mikasa and her unnatural strength yet.

'We need him. He doesn't need us. Understand that none of you can afford to point your blades at him without my orders. The next time you do so, I will be your opponent.'

Eld and Gunther had looked nervous, Olou had visibly begun to sweat and Petra had looked at him a little strangely. However, they all seemed to understand the point he wanted to make. '

'Am I clear?

They all nodded

'Yes Sir!'

____________________________________

He had made sure to still have that chat with Eren, to make him understand his squads actions. He knew Eren trusted him a little more this time around-his showing support toward him like this had likely changed his opinion of him, if only a little. Levi was banking on that, hopefully he could push the kid in the right direction.

He had gone to his room after Hange had explained Eren's transformation and his squad had shown support towards Eren by biting their hands. A filthy act, but he supposed in this case he would allow it. Not that it stopped him from ordering them to go sanitise their hands and not come near him for a while.

He had even made his tea on his own, unwilling to let them touch them with their germ infected hands. Petra had looked at him oddly when he had told her he would do it on his own, almost like a kicked puppy.

He sat in bed, tea long finished and mind occupied.

He had been somewhat productive so far, managing to manipulate Erwin into changing the plan to capture the female titan. His squad was well in the loop, and likely making several plans to take on a titan shifter. Eren was beginning to look at him with more trust, something he hoped would blossom more.

There was still too much to figure out though. And since Levi had resolved to not let Erwin in on the plan, he was now drowning in things he needed to figure out. How Erwin managed to sort through so much crap was beyond him.

Some things, he had already figured out. Others were still being debated upon.

When it came to Historia, he would injure her tommorow, to the point she wouldn't be able make it to the expedition. She would likely try to jail him for it after taking the crown, but he figured he could call it vacation time from work and enjoy the silence. Those brats were too loud anyways.

He knew that Rod Reiss might come after her sooner after hearing that she had been injured, so he would have an old friend keep an eye out for her. It was an aquantince from the underground, one of the few he could trust, that had managed to crawl their way to the surface too. He was strong and capable-and very good at hiding when he needed to.

Only Levi had ever been able to find him- and since he knew Kenny Ackerman wouldn't be used yet, he felt it was the best way to keep her safe.

He had also decided that he would have to kill Kenny. He had contemplated recruiting the old bastard, but Kenny was too much of a gamble. The type only Erwin would take on trying to recruit. And while it would be feasible to drop hints about his mentor in the underground to the Commander, he wasn't sure the Survey Corps could handle a mission like that. Their attention needed to be on capturing shifters and getting Historia to the crown.

Maybe Erwin could risk something like that, but this time it would be his deicison. Kenny, despite his conflicting feelings towards him, had to be eliminated. He just couldn't chance their opposition having someone like that on their side, and wasn't confident enough that they could get him to jump ship.

The rest he was still a little muddled on. He was reasonably sure he could draw Ymir to their side, especially if he told her about how Historia would be queen soon. But the girl wasn't dumb, she would also be able to tell that Historia would have a part time job as child breeder, and might even try to leave with her then.

It pained him to do so, but he couldn't save Historia from that fate. He could, however try his damned hardest that her children wouldn't be turned into shifters.

The other shifters left him feeling conflicted. They needed the Colossal titan, he would be their mass weapon against other nations. The moment he could, he would get the serum and feed Bertolts titan to one of their soldiers. There would be no compromising on that, no matter how much he wished he could lure the kid to their side instead and spare him from that painful death. He just didn't know the kid enough to ensure he could win him over.

As for Reiner, Levi recalled the young man who had stepped up to stop Eren. He recognised that he was stuck in a tough place, but again, he would have to harden his heart. He had to keep his side as safe as possible, even if it meant taking away the armoured titan.

A part of him still hoped that he could get the kid to join him though, he would definitely try for it.

As for Zeke and Pieck, who had likely already arrived on the island, they would be dealt promptly. Zeke would need to be restrained and hidden away in a deep tunnel, while the cart titan would be given to someone else.

He would, unfortunately, have to allow Zeke to turn Ragako Village into titans. But he figured not everyone needed to be turned for it, he could at least get the children out of there. Connie's mother had been key in figuring out the truth about titans, and so he would have to sacrifice her. But Connie's siblings would at least live this time around.

More of his cormades would survive the attack too, having less titans to deal with. He was hoping that Mike and his squad would get out of it alive and not be dealt the same unfortunate fate they had suffered through before.

When it came to Annie, however, Levi already knew what to do. If all went well, he was more then sure that the Female Titan would be fighting for the Island soon enough.

His plans regarding the shifters were a big gamble on his part, since it was all relying on one thing specifically.

Getting the titan serum from the Royal government.

But Levi was a thief at heart, a man who knew how to get things no one wanted to give, to find them in the shadiest corner, completely undetected. Worst comes, he would easily infiltrate. Their security was crap anyways.

He would know. It wouldn't be the first time he had stolen something from those bastards anyways.

Levi laid down, covering himself with a blanket. He thought of one last thing before he allowed sleep to overcome him.

It was dumb of Marley to send six of their shifters to the Island, and all at the same time too. Because Levi had no intention of letting any of them go back home, not this time around.

____________________________________

In all his years of living, Levi had gotten used to being surprised. He had gone through surprise attacks, friends turning into foes, getting punched by the Queen and even time travelled. Yet had taken it all in a stride.

He had expected that half his plans would fail, that he would end up losing his squad anyways, that Annie would escape this time too. But here they were, sitting in the mess hall, post expedition, and very much alive.

Erwin had informed more squads about the traitor, although thankfully Reiner and his squad hadn't been told. Most of them had understood that they likely wouldn't be able to take on the threat, and their squad leaders had made sure to have them engage very litte. They had tactfully allowed the Female Titan to pass through the formation, thus leading her to Eren. More lives had been saved this time around, much to his pleasure.

They had gone through the same plan, trapping her in the forest. Erwin had stood by and watched as the female titan glared at him. Beside him had stood soldier with black hair, wearing a hoodie. Their face had been hidden, but everyone had called that soldier captain Levi. It had made Annie think she was safe, that when she called titans to her and left to go after squad Levi, Humanity's Strongest wouldn't come after her until she accomplished her mission.

It was only when she reached the squad and made to slice at Gunther that she realise that she had been duped. The sight of Humanity's Strongest blocking her blade with his own had caused her to sweat.

Things had gotten on easily then, she hadn't been much match for him. And his squad had taken double their usual measures, going as far as to throw explosives at her before he could carve her out of the nape. Eren had watched it all in awe, thankfully the brat hadn't needed to transform this time around.

His expression had quickly changed to shock and betrayal once he spotted his comrade sealed in a crystal. Levi wasn't suprised that she had sealed herself like that this time too, he had been counting on it actually.

Levi snapped out of his thoughts and pushed his now empty tray away. He decided it was the perfect time to put his plan into action.

He needed to pay Annie Leonhart a visit.

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A/N: Heyooo. Here's chapter 3! Any guesses how Levi is getting Annie on their side?

Sorry I don't post much, but I swear things have been ridiculously busy. Uni life, housework, and my mom is sick too :(

#AOT #Snk #Attack on titan #Manga spoliers #Levi deserves happiness #More people will live in this #Time travel #Let's change shit #Isayama won't let them be happy so I will #Levi ackerman #Levi aot

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junipersgarden · 5 years ago

Text

metanoia 0. | Prologue

PAIRING: Peter Parker x Superhero!Reader

SUMMARY: After Tony Stark’s sacrifice to save the world, Y/N and Peter make a promise to one another.

WORD COUNT: 1754 words

WARNINGS: Angst, crying/ sadness and a funeral

[NOT MY GIF]

...

After the Battle of Earth - October 2023

...

Silence.

Even with every single hero that fought in the battle against the Mad Titan all in one place, complete and utter silence embodied them all as they stood in remorse and sorrow, mourning for their fallen avenger.

Tony Stark.

That name had many names, is known by many and will single handily be named as one of the world's greatest defenders; the man who sacrificed his life so that his loved ones and that the Earth could go back to the way things were, the ways things were meant to be even though he wasn't going to be there.

The Avengers had won this battle this time but at what cost?

You still couldn't get the image out of your head; a tarnished battlefield, Thanos's army disappearing one by one, the genocidal warlord turning to dust and Tony.

"And I... am.... Iron Man." Tony breathlessly let out and letting all of his strength go into snapping his fingers, the one desire and wish on his mind, hoping the stones will go by his will. Just once.

You wanted to cry to him, scream or just anything but even if you did, Tony knew the sacrifice had to be made, for you and for the ones around him.

You took small, staggered steps towards Tony, reaching and praying the universe would show him mercy, that everything could be okay and normal.

Through misty and weak eyes, you spotted him kneeling on the cracked ground, determination in his eyes, staring straight into the eyes of the enemy.

But as close and and as far away you were from him, the familiar snap of fingers rang through your ears.

"Tony-" You croaked out, fear burying itself inside of your subconscious, mind building unwanted thoughts and concerns of the worst, you tried walking toward him, still weak from the fight but a bright, piercing white light blinded your vision right before you could make it to him.

A hand on your shoulder startled you and you were brought back into the reality you wished wasn't real.

Turning around, your eyes met with none other than Peter Parker's soft, puffy chocolate brown one's. His eyes weren't full of innocence and happiness as you were used to seeing them

Peter gave a sad but yet comforting smile to you, afraid if he were to say something he would just choke up so he didn't.

His miserable smile somehow comforted you; he always has been able to make you feel secure and safe even in times where it seemed like nothing could overcome whatever you were going through.

But despite it all, Peter was your life-line, the one thing keeping you sane from all this madness.

Without him saying anything, you knew what he was asking you; the pained and concerned expression over his face.

You couldn't answer him though. All you could do was emit stingful tears and cross your arms around you, clinging onto yourself so tightly.

As Peter inched closer to your side, you looked up and saw how much agony he was in and your heart shattered even more just by knowing how close Peter truly was to Tony.

Hesitantly, you started leaning into Peter because his face and body was screaming 'Y/N I need you.' so you took the opportunity and laid yourself into his right side, a sense of relief and a ripple of reassurance rushing throughout your body as he allowed you to fall into his.

Peter jolted slightly when he felt you but he responded as quickly as you acted, automatically snaking his arm around your waist, hugging you firmly to assure you that you're not alone and that he is there for you when you need him.

You could easily tell that he was thinking from the way his eyes stared so intensely at the ground; he's been in this position so many times from his parents to Uncle Ben and knowing Peter, you knew he was blaming himself, wishing he could of done more to prevent this but both of you knew there was nothing anyone could do to stop Tony.

The light startled you so much that you stopped straight in your tracks and your arms enveloped over your eyes to protect them from it but as soon as it appeared, it vanished.

Standing tall and in your masked suit, you noticed a piece of dust landed on your arm, the dust like substance you were so familiar with when yourself faded away from Thanos's actions.

Observing the area you saw that one by one, the numbers from Thanos's army decreased as his troops began to disappear from existence.

Everyone looked around at the enemy disintegrating away into nothing, looks of triumph and reassurance that shone on each Avenger's face; after 5 years, they had won the battle.

But with this victory, all you could do was worry about Tony; he stood frailly before loosing all his strength and leaned against rubble, sinking down in defeat.

This isn't happening, this isn't happening, it's going to be okay.

With all your intrusive thoughts swarming and attacking you, growing bigger and bigger by the second, you spot War Machine followed by Spider-Man aid his side.

"Mr. Stark?" such a weak voice calls.

Now that voice you know too well. That's the same voice you've heard explain to you the homework due, the same voice that argued with you for hours about Star Wars, the same voice that reminds you of the better days.

"It's Peter."

Oh god...

Peter Parker; you always knew he was meant for something greater in this world but you never would of expected him to be Spider-Man. It never occurred that sweet, innocent Peter had experienced all the perks of being a superhero or that he knows what war truly is like and the consequences that come out of it.

Yet here Peter was, kneeling in front of his idol, whispering words of support and sympathy.

Before thinking your instincts kicked in and your foot rose from the ground, you were sprinting toward your best friend. Feet harshly stomping on the Earth's ruined terrain, breathing heavy from the burning in your throat from the despair inside of you.

You ran across the planet in a matter of what seemed like a life time and finally came to a halt when you saw Tony; his skin like charcoal, pale and lifeless eyes stare straight into your soul causing you to loose balance and fall on your knees.

Peter jumped from the noise of machinery scrapping the ground and turned to you. His face is bloody and bruised and has no glow like it always did before; Peter feels numb and nothing just like you are.

You looked into Peter's scared eyes and swiftly pulled him away from Tony and into a crushing hug as he cried into you.

He can't see me. With a mask over your face, he doesn't know who and what you are; no one does, not even Tony.

Give me a sign he is okay please.

But no sign is given; Pepper is now by his side and for a second, a brightness sparks in Tony's eyes when he sees her but dims just as quickly.

The look in Pepper's eyes and the nod of approval gives it all away and with the revelation that this is fact is real and better yet happening right in front of you, with nothing you could do to stop it.

Peter, you and everyone looked at Tony, filled with remorse, knowing that it was the last time they would see him friend but yet, he was a blur from all the tears that surrounded their eyes.

"We're going to be okay." Pepper assured him.

No we're not-

"You can rest now." Her voice trembled slightly as a subtle smile swept across her face, planting a final kiss on Tony's cheek.

Tony didn't say anything after that; he gently grabbed Pepper's hand and guided it to his heart and kept it there, arc reactor so small, so broken and so quickly departing.

Everyone around him stood to a standstill; the planet stopped orbiting, their hearts stopped beating but yet, their sorrows and tears began.

Say something Y/N.... say anything to him this is it.

But no courage or strength could even make you stutter a final goodbye and closure to him; he was already gone.

"He loved you, you know that... right?" Peter broke the silence.

You once again came back into reality and saw that now Pepper, Rhodey, Happy, Steve and Morgan had placed themselves on the dock and all were standing together in remembrance.

"He loved you too Pete... and was as equally proud of you as well."

Peter gripped you tighter after your statement and you felt a teardrop soak your black dress.

He's been through so much already; who knows when he'll break. Jesus Christ Peter needs a break...

"Y/N?"

"...Yes Peter?"

"I-I know you weren't there when he- passed but just p-promise me that you'll stay by me... please? I just need you and you're the only one remotely close to my a-age who was close to To-"

"Peter." You huff out and interrupt his rambling, "You're my best friend, I'm here for you and I hope- no I know that you and I are going to be okay as long as we stick together."

"Just Y/N p-please promise me-"

"I promise you Peter. I'm not going anywhere."

Peter loosely released his hold on you and as you look up, you see his smile; oh boy that smile you've longed to see for a long time but you notice he is pointing his pinkie at you.

"Pinky promise Y/N?"

You can't help but actually and genuinely giggle at him by his child like antics but it all disappears when you notice again his puffy, bloodshot eyes full of worry and regret.

"I promise." Peter interlocks his pinkie with yours and for the first time in a long time, you both smile.

Hopefully Ned and MJ can help me with Pete... May and even Happy too; he needs support; he can't be left alone.

Peter Parker is Spider-Man... what is everyone going to do to him after Tony's gone... will they look to him?

And what about me and being Saviour? No one knows not even Peter.

I can't let Peter know I'm Saviour; it'll ruin him...

I won't let him find out.

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