There a few things people need to know before criticizing The On1y One:
It's based on a chinese novel, not taiwanese. It may seem like a small detail, but it isn't.
This was supposed to be adapted in mainland China, but due censorship production went to Taiwan to avoid interference.
Liu Dong (Eric Zayn) casting did come under fire prior to release due his age, he is 30. Him being on the show was actually a demand from one of the financial backers.
Liu most likely would've been casted if the show remained in mainland China, where he resides. And because he lives there he cannot promote the show with his partner. So you probably won't see him beside Jiang any time soon.
He is actually at risk of suffering retaliation from chinese government by staying there and working on this show.
From the get go director Liu Kuang Hui made it clear that show and book would be different from one another. Want what you get in the novel? Stick to it, because the show won't be a word by word adaptation.
Again, since production started on mainland China what we get probably was adapted to avoid problems with their government, so you can put that on their never ending homophobic tab.
So there you have it, hopefully this helps clear a few things up.
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Hey, sorry if this is a bit of a personal question - and feel free to ignore it if it is - but how did you know you wanted to start hrt? I am someone who IDs as transmasc and knows in an ideal world, I would've loved to have been born a guy. But the idea of going on hormones is terrifying because I can't figure out if I really want it... I worry about regretting it, or it making me 'unappealing' physically, or my friends judging me for it. Did you ever struggle with similar worries?
I think every person thinking about and starting HRT goes through this. A rite of passage, if you will, and also not a bad thing to do. HRT is a big step, some of the changes (especially on T) are irreversible. It's good to think through if it's a choice that's right for you or not.
That said, it's also Just A Thing You Can Do. I first started really questioning my gender at the end of 2020 (thank you, Elliot Page, for coming out and making me go "oh shit, you can do that?"). I got a therapist to talk about gender... Mid 2022? And started hormones spring 2023, top surgery a year later.
Before getting the therapist, I spent over a year Just Thinking About It. And a lot of the thoughts were around the changes on T and if I'd like them or not or if I'd regret them. If I'd be ugly, after being conventionally attractive as a woman.
It hits a point, though, where eventually you have to pull the plug one way or another. I spent a lot of time thinking about how my body would change on T. A Lot. With longing. I caught myself putting things off Until I Knew For Sure and because I didn't want to do it while being perceived as a woman. I was sitting, treading water for a hypothetical Later that I could start moving towards at any time. I was scared for the Teenage Round 2 phase, and didn't want to spend months being "ugly and awkward", but then the months passed anyway and I was still in the same spot.
HRT isn't an all-or-nothing thing, you can ease into it on a low dose. My doctor started me on a low dose and we ramped up over months. Some T changes can start pretty quickly (voice dropping, bottom growth - this isn't true for everyone, but was true for me). If these changes excite you, make you feel good - great! Keep going! If they scare you, feel wrong - stop. Assess. Figure out what about it isn't right (a gender therapist for all of this process is a Huge Help). In early days if you stop T, the changes can revert, for the most part. But you can always stop at any time.
The bigger thing I actively worked to wrap my head around before starting HRT is - Who Cares If You're Wrong? What's right for you now might not be right for you later. The idea of detransitioning was scary to me, society has such a weird spotlight on it, the Right uses people who have detransitioned as props against transition. But it shouldn't matter. At the end of the day, if I do change my mind, I'll know myself better, and I don't think it's wrong to chase and find comfort in your own body.
A year+ on T, I've mostly made it through the ugly duck phase, I think. I was lucky, I didn't get bad acne or get too oily or anything (after having horrible acne in my first puberty). Most of what I dealt with was the chronic baby face, where I was getting read as male but a teenager - I'm almost 30 and a woman wanted to card me over a free T-shirt at a baseball game because it had beer logos on it. After some middle months of changes and going "oh my god what am I doing" and not feeling confident in how this was all going to turn out, I think of myself as relatively attractive and I think I'm just going to get more vain as my beard comes in. Some of that is physical, sure, but I think a significant amount of that is me feeling more confident in myself and liking the body I'm in more. I was never a selfie or picture person, now I am. I joke I'm like a budgie, always looking at myself if there's a reflective surface nearby. I'm more excited to exercise, I'm interested in lifting weights for the first time, I'm curious what my body on T can do and become. Keep your eyes on the pieces that are going well, the changes exciting you, and let the rest catch up.
My social circle helped a lot. I'm very lucky and blessed to have great friends and family, all of whom are supportive. If you don't have friends who are supportive of you, that are judging you for exploring yourself rather than lifting you up for it, it's a sign to expand the social circle and find ones that are. Family is harder, but that's a thing you have to navigate for yourself and find your own boundaries for.
So, there's no ~one moment~ where you're 100% certain that medical transition is right for you. It's a huge unknown and you're changing the body you've had your entire life. At some point, though, you just have to jump and see how it lands. Part of being alive is making mistakes and doing things you might regret.
That said, the regret rate for trans people is something like 3%. The regret rate for knee surgery is something like 20%. Trust yourself.
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Au where Damian is closer in age to Tim and joins the batfam after Jason dies
bruce has to make himself functional with a new kid dropped in his lap and then has to cut back on the violent outbursts because Damian WILL take it as permission to kill and they're trying to teach him not to do that
tim keeps his stalker tendencies and grows to like Damian's robin just as much as Dick and Jason's, even if this new robin is a bit stabby around the edges
damian is the first robin to notice Tim tho and confronts him on his own without telling Bruce
timmy is like heyyy don't stab me I swear I wouldn't endanger the bats ever & also I can maybe give you info I find sneaking around & also hey wouldn't it be cool to have a secret from bats? You could have your own personal informant wouldn't that be so cool you could impress Batman and everything
dami: fine but you don't have any more secrets right
tim, knows their secret identities: and I said no, y'know, like a liar
so they make a truce that turns into a friendship that turns into Damian hiding the fact that he has adopted a brother, shut up Batman you picked up random children from the street so can damian
bruce and dick: wow it's so nice that Damian has started listening to us about not killing or using excessive violence on people. We're glad he understands now
Damian, who got a 72 slide PowerPoint lecture from Tim about the practicality of not killing as a vigilante in Gotham: yes, that is what happened. I have accepted your perspectives on morality. No other reason
tim’s powerpoint has a lot of graphs and venn diagrams measuring different kinds of criminal activity vs public cooperation vs batman's violence levels vs police cooperation vs rogue activity. The gotham ecosystem is delicate
when jason comes back tim throws a fit because he has to REMAKE his powerpoint and all the graphs to add red hood’s vigilante-slash-rogue effect
Tim at some point: batman is fragile if you kill people it will make his traumatized brain explode
Dami: trauma?
Tim: y'know from martha and thomas being murdered in front of him
Damian, eyes narrowed:
Tim: I mean… that's just a game theory?
but just like generally Tim and Damian being each other's support systems
they bond over having parents who are absent?? Like, damian missing his mom and tim immediately empathizing on how its hard when you love someone who is away a lot or for a long time
they talk about missing them and damian is able to open up about feeling out of place and how difficult it is to adjust or know how he's supposed to act
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what ghost haunts you?
the ghost of devotion .
your body was crafted to be loved and to be adored. you write with the touch of a poet, the fingertips of a lover. if you are not loved, you are not whole. you are made to be sculpted by the hands of another into something perfect. without their love, you feel as though you may crumble without the support of purpose their touch provides. when ernest hemingway wrote “it was too good to last.” when ocean vuong wrote, “i miss you more than i remember you.” when david foster wallace wrote, “everything i’ve ever let go of has claw marks on it.”
the ghost of the damned .
you rot with the need for something more than what you have. the ghost is built up of the feeling of stagnation. you find it staring at the ceiling with sleep - blurred vision ; this is the third night you have met its eyes in the early hours of the morning. you tear yourself apart looking for comfort, for validation, for acceptance. but it never feels quite enough. you ruin everything you touch, despite every attempt to be more than what you have always been. you would sculpt yourself as something perfect for those around you, but you are no artist. when albert camus wrote, “be silent, heart; there is no hope!” when lucille clifton wrote, “maybe i should’ve wanted less. maybe i should’ve ignored the bowl in me, begging to be filled.” when taylor swift said, “i’m still on that tightrope, i’m still trying everything to get you looking at me.”
tagged by @primordyalsoul ty sumin!!!!
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