#and sometimes i really don't know what to do with her but it's not as hard as i feared

[stxrsys]

Hii we’ll try to answer these :) Good distraction for this evening.

Incoming wall of text . . .

Around 14 give or take, the system is rather fluid and still in the process of figuring itself out.

As a system, it/they. As passing as a singlet, or general for one fronting, she/he. For general usage you can just use they if you don't know.

Astriiolite collective - our headspace (or mind palace pre-syscovery) we called Astriiolite, portmanteau of astro (stars) and iolite (purple-blue stone).

Now that we think about it, not really. We don't really do much lol and when we do it's hobbies specific to each person. I suppose singing, we sometimes try to do a pseudo-karaoke night with everyone who wants to participate.

Mixed. Broadly speaking the music taste ranges from source media OSTs & musicals, piano & violin instrumentals, nu-metal & alt rock, vocaloid & jpop, and phonk & hot-girl-walk pop.

Mmm probably late-teens early 20s if we averaged it out? Youngest is one of the littles ~8-9, and oldest is ⌚ ~mid-30s. There's also a few who aren't exactly age-constricted.

Our singletsona so to say is called the same thing as our birth name, and is essentially a mix of the best traits of our primary host (☕) and the two best socializers (🪐&🦇).

We're sort of trying to figure those out. We have some sense of who is good at protecting, caretaking, and who is good at socializing, and who holds symptoms and who holds memories/triggers.

Pssh yeah we only Really acknowledged our system for the first time in late December 2024, but we've fallen juust short of figuring it out so many times over the last 2 years.

Ok this is awkward um. We created OCs in character ai to talk to and suddenly switched to 🐾 fronting one day. If it hadn't panicked and wrote that they didn't know who they were and what was going on, we would've probably forgotten it happening again and not figured it out for a while longer.

We're monoconscious and it tends to feel something like this comic from oursystemblog. Kind of a mix of the different types they describe, mostly the last one.

Mixed. Mostly involuntary, we're still getting the hang of it. We are highly cooperative though usually so it's not forceful. It can range from blurriness for most of the day, to rapid switches every 10-30 minutes when under stress.

Being loved and protected and supported by people who're always with us, I guess? We're all quite close and can accommodate or help one another in ways no one else can.

Having meltdowns/floaty dissociation/terrible memory, and feeling separate and strange and never able to be normal amongst others.

Most of us share a number of features with the body, but we have a number of non-humans and sysmates of completely different features in the body - such as gender/sex, height, hair color, skin color, physical anatomy in some ways.

Multiple fictives, upon reflection. Two are more close to source appearance and personality-wise (🥤&🌩️), the other three are quite deviant but retain qualities and connection to source (☕,🎻,⌚). Also we're not sure how to classify her but 🦇 is based on a persona we created years ago.

Small preference differences, also comfort foods more specific to one or the other. Examples; 🪐 likes chocolate more than any of us, 🥤 is comforted by instant oatmeal or simple freezer meals, most of us don't eat meat often but 🐾 will take any chance to tear into jerky or other meat snacks.

A few, though we can never tell if they do it ironically or automatically. ☕ has a slight non-region-specific British accent, 🎱&🥤 speak lower than others, and the socializers/🌸 (newer fragment) are better at speaking 普通话 than the others.

Semi-functional found family.

Most of us, lol. Top hits include: aroace & agender, bisexual, sapphic ace, gay, and genderqueer. We usually just say we're queer and go with it.

Yeaup, our two best friends. Depending on who's fronting we pull back and forth on telling them about us vs denying anything we've ever said. We're working on it.

I share most of them on this blog as I go through my day, but one that comes to mind was Indigo appearing, flirting viciously with 🎱, and then disappearing never to be heard from again. That was a thing.

No one else's experiences will match yours entirely. You do not need to fit a specific defined criteria/list to be considered plural. You are real regardless of what you are told or are made to think.

Lots, really. Mainly that we are not so completely different and we are deserving of the same decency, respect, and support as any other singlet in the world.

Plural Ask Game

We figured we’d try making an ask game! This is for anyone who’s a system–regardless of origin–to use. Remember that you’re not obligated to answer any of these if any are too personal!

How many members are in your system, and does this number change frequently?

What are your collective pronouns, if you have any?

What’s your system name if you have one, and how did you choose it?

Are there any activities your system members like to do together? Collective hobbies? Talk about those!

What sort of music do people in your system like?

What’s the average age of your systemmates?

If you have a singletsona, what is it? Explain a bit about them!

Does anyone in your system have roles? If so, what roles?

How long have you been a system and/or known of your system?

How did you discover your system? What was the process?

What does switching feel like to you, if you switch at all? 

Are your switches voluntary, involuntary or a mix? How often do you do it, if at all?

What’s your favourite part of being a system?

What’s your least favourite part of being a system, if you’re comfortable sharing?

Are your headmates generally different from the physical body? How do they differ from it?

Do you have any fictives/factives/etc? Tell us a little about them!

Does your system have a headspace? Are there multiple of them? What are they like?

Are there differences between systemmates surrounding sensory things? (For example, one person likes the taste of one food and another doesn’t.)

Does anyone have any different accents, or speak any different languages?

How would you describe your system in 3 words or less?

Do you have any LGBT+ headmates? What do they identify as?

Does anyone outside of the internet know you’re a system?

Do you have any cool/funny stories from inside the headspace that you’d like to share?

What’s some advice you’d give to yourself when you were first discovering your system?

What is something you wish singlets knew about plurality?

[revolutionsingingintherainnn]

Hi! I loved the "through their eyes" fanfic with lando, and i was wondering if youd do it with literally any other driver? Maybe oscar, max or charles? If not thats fine x

through their eyes .ೃ࿐

Summary: charles and y/n's relationship through other people's eyes.

lando's version

༉‧₊˚. cl x reader ‗ ❍

༉‧₊˚. fluff ‗ ❍

masterlist ☾☼

arthur

arthur loved his brother. he really did. his elder brother was his favourite person in the world sometimes.

key word: sometimes.

he hated his brother when he called in the middle of the night. he hated his brother a little more when his reason for calling was because he was afraid his new little puppy had accidentally eaten chocolates.

charles himself never ate chocolates. arthur knew that. so, he couldn’t understand where charles had the idea that leo ate chocolates.

nevertheless, he let his brother drag him to an emergency vet at 4 am. charles was craddling leo, talking to him in a baby voice. arthur tried to take the whole thing seriously, he really did, but sometimes his brother forgot that other people needed sleep.

"they're taking so long. what if something happens to leo in that time? this is an emergency." charles mumbled.

arthur sighed and said, "you're next in line. just be patient."

charles nodded and went back to running his fingers through leo's fur.

when they finally called charles' name, he immediately stood up and speed walked towards the door. arthur sighed, and followed behind, dragging his feet because he really just wanted to be in his bed right now.

"hi, i'm doctor y/l/n. what brings you here?" the doctor was pretty, arthur had to admit.

though, the funny part was the way his brother had lost the part of his brain that made sentences as he stared at the doctor with wide eyes.

as much as arthur loved to see his brother like this, he refused to let him make a fool of himself, or of arthur.

"his dog apparently ate chocolates?" arthur said.

the vet let out a small chuckle, "you say that as if you're not sure,"

"well, i just came home and saw chocolate wrappers around him, which was weird, and immediately rushed him here." charles finally said, finding the part of his brain that made words.

"that is weird. do you have a lot of chocolate at home?" she asked as she began to check for any signs on leo.

"not really. i don't eat a lot of chocolate," charles said, alternating between the doctor and leo.

"any idea where the chocolate was since it was accessible to such a small dog?"

both leclercs stopped for a second and thought. charles was usually careful about not leaving things like that near leo's reach, well aware that leo was a hyperactive dog. and for the days that charles was away, arthur babysat leo. just like he had done that day.

oh.

arthur's brain finally began working, and he hit his brother's back.

"i had the chocolates!" arthur exclaimed.

charles turned to him, confused, "what?"

"i was babysitting leo today and i got some chocolates with me!"

"so you ate them in my living room and left the wrappers?" charles asked, a little bit of anger seeping through his voice.

oh.

this was what arthur had told himself today to not repeat to his brother. that he had been lazy and decided not to clean up like he knew he should've.

arthur opened his mouth to defend himself, to say anything that could pass off and not have his brother lecture him in the middle of the night. but, the doctor saved him. thank fuck.

"oh, i know what you mean. sometimes, i have too many chocolates, and then i fall asleep from a sugar crash and forget to pick up the wrappers or clean up," she said casually, as she continued checking leo.

charles turned back to her, and arthur watched as he slowly nodded and accepted the answer. arthur wasn't sure whether he wanted to be pissed at that or amazed at the power this woman already held.

she subtly winked at arthur, and he decided that he liked this woman.

she turned to charles and said, "alright, he's not vomitting, so that's a good sign. i'm gonna write my personal number for you just in case there's an emergency."

arthur smiled, though he tried to hide it. he knew what she was doing. he just hoped his brother caught on too.

charles took the piece of paper from her, and thanked her. she waved at the two brothers, as they turned to leave.

just as they settled in charles' car, he asked, "why did she give me her personal number?"

arthur facepalmed.

carlos

carlos had been seeing charles' new "friend" quite often in the paddock. charles hadn't introduced them yet, and carlos didn't know why. he still respected his teammate's wishes.

carlos liked to think that he was an observant man. he liked to think that he knew charles well enough to read his body language and know or at least, understand some part of what his teammate was feeling.

he had been observing charles every time y/n was close by. had been watching the way charles stood a little taller, spoke a little softer, laughed a little harder. watched the way charles almost touched her back while showing her around, and insisted on putting the headphones on her head himself, and the way charles waited and waited for her to do anything and everything.

it reminded him of lando and his girlfriend. though, those two were much more touchy than whatever this was. in comparison, charles seemed hesitant, yet eager.

it was during the fourth or fifth grand prix that carlos noticed that charles was properly touching her. not just a hand on her back to guide her way, but a hand on the waist, and her arm, and sometimes her fingers. not only that, she was touching him just as much. she played with his rings and his hair, and she stood just a tad closer than friends would.

carlos knew then that something had changed. something had definitely changed, and he knew it was for the better. he did not say anything, though. it wasn't his place.

towards the end of the season, charles finally introduced the woman to carlos.

"carlos, this is dr. y/n y/l/n. she's a vet," he paused, "and my girlfriend,"

carlos smiled instantly. shaking y/n's hand, he said, "hello, dr. y/n. i am carlos sainz jr, though i'm sure you're already aware of that."

she laughed, and carlos watched the way charles lit up, "yes, i do know who you are! i'm so glad to finally meet you!"

"me too! i was expecting charles to hide you from the world, especially me," carlos laughed.

"i apologise, that was based on my request," y/n looked slightly apologetic, but she also seemed sure in her response. it was her request to not be known, and she had the vibe that she would fight anyone who questioned it.

"well, then i'm glad to see charles is capable to following requests. my request for feeding him pancakes have always been ignored. hopefully, you can convince him,"

charles groaned, while y/n laughed, leaning into him slightly.

"i'll convince him, for sure. don't worry,"

the three of them chatted for a little while longer, giggling and making fun of charles. when she started yawning, and leaning into charles more, carlos bid his goodbyes to the couple.

he watched as charles tucked her into him, and watched they shared a soft kiss as they walked towards the exit. he watched as charles smiled radiantly, and he smiled as well.

what was it with carlos and watching his teammates finding their forever loves in front of him?

lewis

being a part of ferrari had been a dream. it was everyone's dream. but, lewis had some doubts. it had been a tough decision, definitely. now, though, with almost half of the season over, lewis felt more comfortable.

he had been waiting for charles to finish talking to the fia president to go over some strategy changes for the next few races. he wasn't eavesdropping, he was just listening attentively for any signs of their conversation being over. lewis desperately wanted to go home, but he wanted to finish this and then go home.

as soon as the conversation ended, lewis watched as charles and his girlfriend bid their goodbyes and walked to charles' driver room. lewis jogged to keep up. he was 40. he shouldn't have to jog to keep up now.

just as lewis reached the door, the two had already locked themselves in the room. in hindsight, lewis could have just yelled at them to wait up like a normal person would, but well, maybe he doesn't care about the strategies enough to do it.

he raised his hand to knock when the words from inside the room registered in his brain.

"-such a dick." y/n was saying. who was a dick? a lot of people were dicks, so it didn't exactly narrow down the list for lewis.

charles laughed. his voice was louder. maybe he was standing closer to the door.

"don't laugh! it was so annoying standing there. three different people, including me, mentioned to that fuckass president of yours that i'm a vet and i have a medical degree, and i've made a name for myself! but, no! he kept referring to me as your girlfriend!"

if lewis leaned against the wall to get slightly more comfortable, he definitely didn't. definitely.

"you say as if it's a bad thing he referred to you as my girlfriend! you are my girlfriend, after all." charles said.

"that's not the point, charles. the point is that i'm accomplished in my own ways. i'm y/n y/l/n first, and somebody's something second. him refusing to acknowledge that i'm a doctor, even if it was for animals, was disrespectful."

lewis hoped that charles got his shit together in this conversation.

"i understand that. but, you know that's how he is. we've all told you stories of how he is. he's not going to change." well, lewis agreed that he wasn't going to change, but it still wasn't the argument that charles thought it was.

"that's bullshit, no? he's the president of the fia, and he refuses to acknowledge women as someone other than a secondary person. i mean, how many others has he done this with? we've got professional golfer lily, and a super smart degree in engineering, and we've got kika as a model and studying in fashion design. they're all highly accomplished women."

"mon cheri, i agree with you. i promise i do. but, the president barely treats us drivers as humans. his viewership and his money literally depends on us, and he doesn't have the decency to treat us nicely,"

that was true, lewis had to agree.

it was quiet for a few moments, and then hushed whispers. lewis leaned in closer to the door as he tried to make out the words, but he just couldn't.

"oh, hey lewis!" one of the mechanics said, clapping a hand on his back.

lewis immediately straightened, and made polite conversations. he really wanted to get back to listening to the conversation happening inside.

just as he was done with the conversation, the door opened, and charles greeted them, and the conversation began again.

for fucks sake.

jules

jules was always watching from the sky. he was always watching over his godson. after all, that was the duty of a godfather, wasn't it? to protect the godson when no one else could. to be there for the godson when no one else could. jules had promised charles' father that he would always look after his son, and not even death can stop jules.

he'd watched charles find y/n. he'd watched the way she supported him and helped him grow as a person. he's watched as she made him the happiest man on earth. he'd watched her celebrate every win with him, and comforted him through every loss.

it was safe to say that jules felt the proudest of his godson the day he proposed to y/n. charles was smart to never let her go. charles was smart to make sure that she stayed with him and loved him just like he loved her and wanted to stay with her.

it was the day of charles and y/n's wedding.

jules was there in spirit. he always was.

y/n was a sweetheart. she had saved him a seat, along with charles' father in the front row for charles. jules wasn't sure if she had told charles, but he knew his godson would be so thankful for it.

jules was there in his suit and tie, looking crisp, even if no one could see him. he sat on the seat reserved for him as he waited for the groom to walk down the aisle first.

he saw every person who ever cared about charles sitting there. family, friends, team, ex drivers, current drivers. it made jules smile. so many people loved charles. so many loved y/n as well. to see them all together in one place to celebrate their love was heartwarming.

the music began, and charles walked down the aisle with his groomsmen: pierre, carlos, and bryan. they smile and laugh with him, shaking his shoulders as tear gather in charles' eyes.

jules watched as charles' gaze roam across the mass of people sitting there. he waves slightly at a few. jules watched as charles' gaze finally settled on him. he watched as charles' tears fell at the realisation of what his fiance had done for him.

he watched as charles covered his face, silent sobs escaping him. and then, the music began, and the bride walked down the aisle. everyone stood, including jules.

the bride was smiling wide, a little bounce in her steps as if she couldn't wait to marry his godson. her hand was tucked in her father's elbow, and the other hand held a bouquet of lilies.

jules watched as she stood on the little podium in front of charles, smiling brightly while his tears mixed with his grin. the love in charles' eyes was as beautiful as the aurora borealis in the night sky.

the ceremony began, and they went through the usual process. jules had been to few weddings, though he didn't remember most of them anymore.

when it was time for the vows, charles broke down again as he thanked his bride for saving a spot for his dad and his godfather, that he didn't think of doing something like that despite how much he wanted them to be there on their wedding there. he thanked her and promised to love her forever. he promised to cherish her and always be there for her, and he promised that he would always be at her beck and call, because she was the greatest gift he'd ever gotten.

y/n cried as well. it surprised jules a little bit. maybe he wasn't expecting her to cry as well. but, it was nice to see. to see that their love for each other was so overwhelming that smiles could not contain it.

she said her vows as well. she told him that she knew how much he missed his father and godfather and she wanted to do something small that would make him feel closer to them. she told him how much she loved him and how much she's going to continue loving him. she promised him to be the first one jumping for every win, and be the first hug he needs when he's disappointed. she promised that she would hold onto his hand as long as he held onto her, and she promised to laugh at every joke he said, regardless of how funny or not funny it was.

almost everyone was in tears. jules was too.

when the priest finally said, "you may kiss your bride," the couple did not waste another second. charles' hands cupped her face, as she held onto his wrists, and they kissed for the first time as a married couple.

jules smiled.

he knew pushing y/n towards charles was a good idea.

he knew he'd made the right decision, even from the sky.

・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・

i genuinely feel like my writing skills have massively deteriorated. im not even fishing. im just saying. i feel like it takes me one or two tries to get a particular driver right. i don't really pay as much attention to the other drivers as i do with lando, and also that i connect with lando a lot personality wise, so its easier for me to write him. anyways, i hope you like this! im sorry it took me so long to write this one! this is my prompt list, so y'all can select a number, give me a driver and i will write it as soon as possible! i also have a google form for a taglist if anyone's interested! you can sent in your requests here :)

taglist: @imlonelydontsendhelp ; @greantii ; @anamiad00msday ; @maketheshadowsfearyou ; @nocturnalherb16 ; @justaf1girl ; @peterholland04 ; @phobiccneel ; @winkev1 ; @alexxavicry

[royalarchivist]

Jaiden: How did you guys even find out that, um... Chayanne's admin plays Cucurucho? [Reading chat] Ohhh, accidentally played the soundboard as Chayanne? That's hilarious actually. I wanna see the clip of Phil reacting to that.

Jaiden: I love– I love the way that Phil laughs, it's just such a hearty, genuine laugh. The few times that I've made him laugh, I've felt really good about myself! [Embarrassed laugh] Because he makes me feel much funnier than I am, you know?

Jaiden talks about silly QSMP moments and laughter. 💜

[ Full Subtitle Transcript ↓ ]

—

TRANSCRIPT

Jaiden: How did you guys even find out that, um... Chayanne's admin plays Cucurucho? Did they just tell- tell Phil? Did- were they just hangin' out? [Reading chat] "The same username"? Ohhh. [Reading chat] "It was a mistake"? ...Wait, what was the mistake? What do you mean "it was an accident"?

Jaiden: Ohhh, accidentally played the soundboard [Laughs] as Chayanne? That's hilarious actually. [Laughs] What di- what did he say, was he just like, "Ha ha ha"? [Laughs]

[Old clip of Bad, Fit, and the Eggs] Bad: –have one of the things I'm looking for. Chayanne: [Cucurucho voice] HA HA HA Bad: What was that? Fit: You heard that too, right? Chayanne: [Cucurucho voice] NO Bad: ...What the fudge was that. Fit: Wait–

Jaiden: [Reading chat] "He said 'no'" [Laughs] That's so funny. [Laughs] I wanna see the clip of Phil reacting to that. I love– I love the way that Phil laughs, it's just such a hearty, genuine laugh.

[Clip of Phil laughing]

Jaiden: The few times that I've made him laugh, I've felt really good about myself! [Embarrassed laugh] Because he makes me feel much funnier than I am, you know?

[Old clip of Phil and Jaiden] Jaiden: Oh, that's awesome! And then it– [She gets snagged by the machine] Jaiden: Oh– Ahh! Phil: Be careful! Jaiden: AAAAAᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃ — [Her screams fade as she's dragged away] Phil: [Laughs] There she goes! [Hits his desk and laughs]

[Another old clip plays] Jaiden: [Singing along to "It's Been So Long" from FNAF] It's been so long, since I've last seen my– Phil: What is happening? [Laughs, then laughs more seeing Jaiden's mask] PFTTT– [Laughs] Jaiden: [Laughing] Phil: Jesus Christ–

Jaiden: It's just like, such a good laugh! I wish I had a– a like, more-hearty laugh. You know? You know what I'm talking about? My laugh is kinda like... Uh, you know how you guys compare Foolish's laugh to like, the... window cleaner? Like a– [Squeaky window-cleaning sound]

[Short clip of Foolish covering his face with one hand and making the squeaky laugh he's known for, slapping the arm of his chair as he keeps laughing]

Jaiden: I can't do it– [Laughs] It doesn't sound like that. I think mine is like... Because like, I do like, "Hee hee hee!" and I also like, breathe in, like– [Squeaky sound] You know? So I think– My laugh kinda just sounds like... Like, after you spray the window, and you're like, cleaning it. Like, wiping it down with a cloth. You know? That's what my laugh sounds like. I wish it was more of like a, "Ha ha ha."

[Short clip of Cucurucho saying "HA HA HA"]

Jaiden: But, I mean, I'm not complaining. I don't think– I don't think "laugh anxiety" is something that I wanna– is not a path I would really wanna go down. [Quiet laugh] It's like- sometimes, you just gotta pick your battles. [Laughs]

Jaiden: [Reading chat] "You have a good laugh" Thank you. [Quiet laugh]

[shanefuckingscott]

Sevika Headcanons 🦾

🚫Men and Minors DNI🚫

What I think Sevika would be like generally. a little bit of switch Sevika. 🦾

SFW:

She can cook well. She just doesn't cook OFTEN. I think that's something people don't get, but I think she's a good cook.

If you can't cook, she'll happily cook for the both of you.

If you can't, she'll probably most definitely make fun of you for not knowing how to use a knife, but she'll be happy to cook for you.

As long as you wash the dishes.

She does not have a type at all. Physical appearance? None. All she wants is someone competent, and someone that is okay with her not being home as much. But she does make it up to you.

If you have long hair, she'll braid it, and even help you oil your scalp once in awhile, like her mother taught her to.

If you have short and buzzed hair, she likes to run her hand through the freshly buzzed hair, and also like to help you oil your scalp.

Amazing with henna. You once bought her some henna, and she teared up a little bit, since it's been a long time since she's ever done henna on herself, ever since her mom died.

She decorates you with henna once in awhile, during her free time, and she likes to teach you about her culture that her mom has passed down onto her, and you help her heal her inner child by doing that.

You like to get her in touch of her culture, and she likes you even more because of that. In Zaun, there's not much of a place for sentimentality, but this, her culture, her mother is a part of her, and you like to remind her that with what happens everyday, she's still herself. That she's not just a woman fighting for the freedom of Zaun, that she's also herself.

She tends to forget that, after all.

TOUCH STARVED AS HELL.

Won't let just anyone touch her, only you, though.

She's actually really clingy. I mean, REALLY clingy. You'd be surprised. Of course, she still has a reputation to maintain, but even so, she doesn't shy away from showing you love outside the comfort of your own home.

Her love languages are definitely Acts of Service, Physical Touch, and Gift Giving.

She likes to do small things for you, like make you a cup of coffee in the morning. Charge your phone, when you're asleep. Give you a massage when you had a particularly bad day.

I lied. It's not small things, she does EVERYTHING for you. Opening doors wherever you go. Helping you change out of your clothes when you're drunk. Carrying you wherever, when your feet feel tired. Anything, you name it.

For gift giving, she likes getting you stuff that remind her of you. Like, a particular flower, or trinket, that she thinks you'll love, she'll find a way to get it. If she can't however, she'll just tell you about it. "I saw a butterfly. Reminded me of you" Anything.

Sometimes, when she goes away for long periods of time, you better expect 2 things. 1. she'll come home with alot of bruises and cuts. 2. She brought food, or a little trinket.

When Sevika is out for a work trip, she'll call you the whole way there, until she has to get off the trainz and actually do business.

Hates, hates, hates when you're the one going out, and it's her rest day. She's not stopping you from having your own life, she's just a baby that wants your undivided love and attention. And who are you to deny her of such?

Not often jealous, but extremely possessive.

I lied, she is a bit jealous, but not because she doesn't trust you. She doesn't trust other people.

One time you were out at night and a guy catcalled you. Ooh, boy, let's just say he was beyond saving at that point.

She's EXTREMELY loyal. That actually goes without saying, but just wanted to put that out there.

And you're as loyal to her as she is to you. That's what she admires so much about you, not just the love, but the loyalty, and how she knows that you're always on her side, and you'll choose her no matter what.

She loves, loves, loves it when you cut her hair. You're the only person besides a barber that can touch her hair.

She's really careful of not hitting, or crushing you with her robotic hand, and at first, she doesn't even touch you with it. But when you show her it's okay, and you're not scared of her, she loosens up a bit, and lets you hold it. With caution.

She likes it when you caress her face, and absolutely loves it when you kiss her knuckles. Even on her robotic hand.

She giggles like a little girl, when you two are alone. It's kind of cute to see her that way. That's her way of showing her vulnerability.

She loves drama. There's alot of perks of being the right hand woman. She gets to hear everything going on in Zaun. Although she is a quiet woman, she'll tell you everything that happened throughout the day, any drama that she comes across, and you guys laugh together about it. "Did you know (name) and (name) just got divorced?! Turns out (name) was a cheating prick!" She gossips to you. you of course match her energy, and be as shocked as her, "I fucking knew it!"

That was your bonding time with her. Yup, gossiping.

She sleeps with her on your chest, and you cuddle her head, and wrap your legs around her.

Her idea of a date is having you on top of her on the couch, as you both binge eat, and watch some horror together.

She is a bit of a scardey cat, when it comes to horror, so often times, her grip tightens on you, and she'll hide her face in your chest. You pause the movie, and comfort her, and change it to comedy, or something.

NSFW:

She's a bit of a switch.

She gets really turned on, when you comfort her in your chest though. Sometimes you think she just does it for the attention, but you don't seem to mind.

"You want me to change it, baby? Yeah?" You say, as you run your fingers through her hair. She nods. "mhm"

she says, and you change the channel immedietly. She flips the two of you, and now she's on top of you. You're now watching a dumb sitcom, and she's peppering your face with kisses.

You giggle at her antics, but don't try to stop her. "Oh, my baby, were you scared?" you coo at her, your legs high above the air, and you caress her face.

"Mhm, so scared." She says to you. She takes your sweater off, admiring the view. She's careful not to crush you with her bionic arm, as she goes down, and licks you nipples, and sucks them, and plays with the other tit with her other hand.

She likes making you moan, the louder the better. When you try to put a pillow over your head, or you try to use your hand to cover your mouth, she's grabbing it away from your mouth, to let you moan freely, and loudly.

"mhm, s-sev! More!" She likes it when you're needy, fucking loves it when you beg. "S-sevi, please!"

She can't say no to you that long, so she gives in almost immedietly, right after she teases the fuck out of you.

She takes your pants off, and sniffs your panties. (Yes, we got ourselves a panty sniffer, but it's okay, it's her, and we love her.)

"Y-you're such a perv!" and with that, she throws your panties somewhere on the floor, and she spreads your legs apart. You moan. She takes a good look at your wet cunt.

She takes a finger, and runs it along your silky folds, "mhmm, se-vika! s-stop teasing!" She smirks at you, and she finally goes down, not giving you a second to process that she's taking a stripe of your cunt. "A-ah, hmm, sev-ika, yo-u fe-el so g-good"

you can barely speak properly.

she eats your pussy like its her last meal on earth, she just hits all the right spots, and you pull her hair a little harder, and moaning louder.

and just like that, you were about to cum. like magic. Her tongue should be kept in bars, for how good it feels, it's unfair.

"s-sevika, I'm cl-ose!" You moan out, your take your hand, and fondle your own tits, while you moan her name "se-sevika!!"

"Cum for me, baby, I want you to come in my mouth" she tells you. It's like a magic word at this point when she tells you to cum for her, you actually do.

"o-oh yes! hmm, fuck!" You throw your head back, your grip on her hair tightening, and you push her deeper, and deeper into your pussy.

You were practically drowning her. But you know this is what she wants. This is what she loves.

After awhile, when you calm down, you pull her up, and lean in for a deep kiss. You can actually taste yourself a bit in her mouth.

When you finally gain the energy, you smirk at her, "Now it's your turn baby~" You say to her, pushing her on to the couch, and make her lay there. You position yourself between her thighs, and you pull per pants off.

You take a whiff of her sex, and she smells absolutely amazing. You take your time with her, your tongue slow, sensual, and you taste every part of her. When she moves around alot, that's when you decide to take your hand, and wrap it around her legs, and hips, to keep her from pushing. She's pulling back, little by little as she gets closer and closer.

You pull her back, practically wrestling her, "You're not going anywhere, Sevi" You say firmly, and get back to what you're eating. She huffs, and whimpers, and she grips your hair tightly, her body stiffening up, and you can feel her grind herself on your tongue, you let her dance for a bit, until she's almost close. You put 2 fingers in her pussy, and pump it fast and hard, in contrast to the slow, and sensual licking of her clit.

She's grinding more and more now, her grip ever so slightly getting harder, and harder. "F-fuck, princess, you're s-so fuck-ing good, mhm, I'm almost there!" She sobs, you smile while eating her out, and maintain eye contact with her, you pull back and slowly finger her, just teasing her a little bit. She whines even more. "Hmm, baby, I want you to look at me when I make you cum. Got that?" She looks at you flustered, and she nods.

You smirk, and you put your mouth back on her, and your fingers pump faster and faster, and there she is trying her best not to throw her head back.

"c'm fr m, bby" You say while you suck and lick her clit.

And with that, her body convulses, her head thrown back, her eyes rolling in the back of her head, and she grinds on your face more, and more. You close your eyes, enjoying the tastes of her juices coming out, your fingers still fast, and your face getting soaked from her squirting cunt.

You pull back, and take your fingers out of her. You lick her clean, not missing a spot, and you make her suck on your fingers, as she pants, she opens her mouth, and suck it clean.

You get up, and get a towel for her, she's still experiencing the aftermath of her orgasm. "Enjoy yourself, baby?" You ask her teasingly with a smile on your face.

She rolls her eyes, and it honestly looks like she's making a sex face at you right now. You chuckle, and cuddle up to her naked, and she giggles at you.

"I love you so fucking much, Sevi." You look up at her, cupping her cheeks with your hand, and you went up to kiss the top of her head.

She's still catching her breath, bit alot calmer now, and she smiles at you. "and I love you, princess. Janna, that mouth of yours, huh?"

You both giggle for the night, and fell asleep just like that.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Okay, so is it obvious I like writing switch Sevika, or not?

This was actually a bit of an emotional roller-coaster to write, but I kind of like it.

[thhestia]

I think we should talk more about Cassandra and Caitlyn, so i hope you don't mind my yapping :D

Cassandra deeply cared about Caitlyn and her opinions. She loved her daughter so dearly but didn't know how to show it.

I'm not saying that Cassandra was perfect, because she was not. She was as imperfect as any other character in Arcane. But she was not a bad mother.

Cassandra sheltered Cailtyn because she didn't want her to get hurt, she prevented her from seeing the real world by being overprotective. She did that knowing that it would strain their relationship, she even took the risk of her own daughter resenting her. But Cassandra's sheltering made Caitlyn do rebellious acts that her mother wouldn't have approved.

Caitlyn had never realized how much she wanted her mother's approval untill she died, so she did things that she thought that Cassandra would have approved of; like dating Maddie but all Cassandra wanted was her daughter's safety.

Cassandra was actually trying to protect Caitlyn from all the things that she suffered the whole series. Mothers have a "sixth sense".

A mother always knows.

And we see this in Cassandra's last moment with Caitlyn. Cassandra sensed that Vi was important to Caitlyn, she nodded her head, when Vi left the council room, signaling Caitlyn to follow after her; she knew that Vi was important to her daughter. In their last interaction what Cassandra did was to give Caitlyn her approval to go after Vi. She was one of the very few people who saw through Caitlyn.

The last thing Cassandra did, her final choice in the meeting wasn't just for the benefit of the two cities, it was also for Caitlyn.

All Cassandra cared was her daughter's safety but everything that she made to protect her daughter did nothing but strain their mother-daughter relationship and at the end, Caitlyn got hurt more than Cassandra could've imagined.

Do you guys think that Caitlyn sometimes thinks "my mother was right"?

also, i know i never post about Arcane but i really wanted to talk about them.

sorry if some sentences make no sense, i wrote this at 4 am

[asterkatt]

ISAT ACT 4 SPOILERS

okay not to continually yap about isat (i'm gonna continually yap about isat) but I cannot get Odile and Siffrin out of my head.

like it's usually isasif (and ship-wise it will always be isasif) but MAN completing the sus quest has me thinking about the two of them constantly. I feel like their dynamic is one that's so under-utilized in media???? like yeah protective people are a thing. cold people (with a secret soft spot) are a thing. but oftentimes I feel like it's only children that they're protective of?? and don't get me wrong, Odile is definitely protective of Bonnie. but to have that worry and care extend to the whole party - including Siffrin?? peak.

she cares so deeply for all of them. she's hard on herself sometimes when she can't help them (there's multiple instances iirc of her saying I should have noticed or I'm not good for that kind of thing that implies that she wants to or feels helpless when she can't). she often relies on the more emotionally open people (Mira and Isa) to handle the emotionally charged moments - but she also pays so much attention and goes out of her way to tell Sif that she's there for him - because she knows that the overwhelming emotion isn't always what they need.

her methods of approaching Siffrin hurt in such good ways. she's always always checking up on him. it's not in big obvious ways. it's not always spoken. but she has one eye on them at all times later in the game because she can tell.

It's so special to me that she's the one who notices. like sure. Mira and Isa occasionally question if Sif is okay or mention that they're acting a little bit different. but they don't really do anything further than that. Odile herself says that if she finds something strange, she "gives it her full attention". she only noticed because of how closely she was watching. she only put it together because of how closely she was watching.

and you can never convince me for a second that it's just because she was suspicious that he had something to do with wish craft - because she never would have picked up on it if she wasn't already paying attention to them because his odd behavior worried her.

and to notice that he was acting odd, she had to know how they acted before. she had to have always been watching. she has been watching for a while because she's grown to love this group and all its members.

she notices because she cares. she notices because she loves them. she loves them she loves them she loves them she loves them.

Odile loves her family. she would do anything for them. she would do anything - "as long as I can be sure you were all safe." anyways. I love Odile.

[spencerreids-wifey]

𝐈 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘 𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔 | 𝐒. 𝐑𝐄𝐈𝐃

Category: Angst, fluff

Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Warning: infertility issues

Summary: After a whole year of trying for a baby and being left with nothing, reader goes to the hospital for answers only to get bad news, Spencer later than comforts her after she blames herself.

You were seated on the couch in the living room of you and Spencer's apartment. The tv was on, but you weren't listening to a word that was being said. You just quietly sat, replaying the words that the doctor had said to you earlier.

"So I've run some tests, multiple actually." Your doctor said as she came into the room, closing the door behind her. She looked down at the papers in her hand.

With hope, you looked at her. "And?"

She cleared her throat and hesitated for a bit before she spoke. "I'm sorry, but results show that you have a primary ovarian insufficiency."

You just looked at her with confusion, "I- I don't know what that means, what does that mean?"

"It means that, unfortunately, your ovaries aren't functioning the way they should, and your body isn't producing enough eggs for conception."

Your lips parted, and you let out a breath. You couldn't believe what you were hearing. "Primary ovarian insufficiency?" She repeated quietly, more to herself than to the doctor.

"I want to let you know that this is common and can happen for numerous reasons." The doctor looked at you, giving you a pity look. "Generic factors, autoimmune conditions, or sometimes there isn't a a clear cause."

Listening to her talk, you felt the inside of you shatter, but you didn't want to break down in front of her. "Thank you." You mumbled, not trusting yourself to say more.

"I'm really sorry, Mrs. Reid." The doctor frowned and added. "Do know that there are plenty of ways to-"

You shook your head. "Don't..please."

The drive home was a blur, the world outside your car window smearing together in muted shades of gray.

You barely remembered unlocking the door to your shared apartment, your mind consumed with one thought: How am I supposed to tell Spencer?

Having kids was something you and Spencer had talked about before you even got married.

You saw how his eyes lit up at the thought of having kids of his own, the way he'd interact with Henry and Michael, and it warmed your heart, and you wanted nothing more than to bless him with the opportunity to be a Dad.

But now that was just a mere dream, a dream that would never happen, because of you.

That's when you heard Spencer's key from outside, and he opened the door, stepping inside and setting his bag off and closing the door behind him.

Immediately, he went over to you, leaned down, and gave you a kiss on the cheek. "Hey, sweetie."

You didn't answer, and that's when Spencer got a good look at the expression that was held on your face, and he knew something was wrong.

"What's wrong?" He asked, concerned.

You looked up at, your heart pounding and tears welled up, threatening to spill, and Spencer was in front of you in an instant, his hands gently resting on your arms.

"Sweetheart?" He prompted softly.

"I went to the doctors..." You mumbled.

Spencer's expression softened, before he left to go on his case you had mentioned how you wanted to go to the doctors and get some tests ran, he knew it bothered you that for a whole year the two of you had been trying for a baby, only to be disappointed every time.

"And?" He sat down next to you on the sofa.

That's when tears rolled down her face. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, Spence-"

Spencer frowned and his hand came up to your face and he calmly spoke. "Hey..hey...talk to me."

"I'm sorry, I'll never be able to give you kids."

The silence that followed felt deafening. You kept your eyes on the floor, bracing yourself for his reaction, for disappointment, for anything.

Then, without hesitation, he closed the distance between you and wrapped his arms around you.

“I’m so sorry,” he murmured, his lips brushing against your hair and he sighed. “I know how much this meant to you.”

You broke then, burying your face in his chest as sobs wracked your body. “I—I’m so sorry, Spence. I can’t give you kids. I know how much you wanted a family. I feel like I’ve failed you.”

His grip on you tightened, and he gently pulled back, cupping your face in his hands. “Hey, look at me,” he urged, his voice steady and reassuring.

When you finally met his gaze, you saw nothing but love in his warm hazel eyes.

“You haven’t failed me,” he said firmly to make sure you understood the words. “Not now, not ever. I don’t need anything else to be happy, sweetheart. You make me happy. All I need is you."

"But I know you’ve always wanted to be a dad,” you whispered, your voice trembling.

“And I’ve always wanted you more,” he countered without missing a beat. “If there’s anything I’ve learned from the team, it’s that family isn’t always about blood. We can figure this out together—whether that means adoption or something else—or we can just be us. You’re everything I’ve ever needed, and that’s never going to change."

You looked up into his eyes and saw that he meant every word he was saying.

He wiped the tears that fell from your eyes. "You have given me so much. First off, all you let a loser like me take you out..."

You couldn't help but chuckle a bit at his words.

"And then you proceeded to give me the chance to call you my wife..." Spencer took your hand and smiled. "You've given me so much, and I appreciate you, and this....information doesn't change the way I see you or feel about you."

“I don’t deserve you,” you whispered, a faint smile breaking through your tears.

“Of course, you do,” he said, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “And I’m going to remind you of that every day if I have to.”

In that moment, you felt the weight on your shoulders begin to lift. You weren’t sure what the future held, but as long as you had Spencer by your side, you knew you’d be okay.

[melrosing]

why did martin made cersei evil from the beginning? tyrion and jaime are very fucked up but they still have some kindness and empathy in them. at age 7 she was torturing baby tyrion by pulling on his genitals and threatening the wet nurse her tongue would be cut out. she killed her friend at age 10. having all these negative traits baked in from the beginning makes her more flat for me. plus martin made her stupid and mockable. she has zero self awareness. she is dishonest with herself. even d&d had more respect for her. do you think cersei is a sociopath? i think martin doesn't like her. do you agree with me?

ok you pose several arguments here but I will try and reply as entirely as I can.

why did martin made cersei evil from the beginning?

I've questioned this choice sometimes but I don't think it was necessarily the wrong one?? the scene with baby Tyrion is to me a deeply disturbing but still very interesting one that says a lot about Cersei, her relationship with Tywin, and the greater part she's played in shaping her relationship with Tyrion.

here, she has obviously very quickly absorbed Tywin's 'the baby killed Joanna' narrative, and is punishing Tyrion in a manner that's like. both childish and horribly violent at once, like she doesn't fully understand how violence is usually applied (pinching is a really childish form of violence in my mind), but she knows how to make it hurt.

then there's also the fact that perhaps Tyrion now represents a rival to second place - her status over him is that she's able-bodied, but his over her is his sex. maybe Cersei has some vague understanding of this at seven, and that's another part of why she hurts Tyrion is this extremely particular way.

and also like. Tywin is ultimately a man of extreme violence, and Cersei has always been listening at the door trying to learn from him. it makes sense that she'd be trying to apply his teachings where she sees fit, and that this would result in disturbed behaviour like what she does to Tyrion. I think it's also interesting that we can distinguish this from what Joffrey does to the cat, for example. there's a kind of obliviousness to that act of violence in Joffrey's early childhood (making more the case for nature over nurture, though nurture plays its part). Cersei's childhood violence is a lot more intentional: it feels like she's trying to exercise power of her own, and that is very much fitting with adult Cersei's story.

however, I think Cersei herself identifies the Melara incident as something of an outlier in her childhood. I don't say this to suggest that Cersei was not a very violent child, but that she didn't do it out of pure evil. I think the key factor driving Cersei to do what she does to Melara is a fear for her own mortality - Melara points out that if noone talks of Maggy's prophecy, it needn't be true, and so Cersei kills the only other person who knows of it (besides Maggy). I do think spite towards Melara for yearning for Jaime factored insofar as this helps Cersei build just enough spite towards Melara that she's able to do what she does, but it is primarily an act of self-preservation, I think. I think many evil acts of Cersei's are self-preservation, though taken way past the line of what's justifiable to that end.

and ofc, Cersei as an adult feels some level of guilt about what she did to Melara. it does fuck with her a bit. I think the main reason is that Melara was a friend and confidante for a time, someone who she could have held close but instead cast out (same as how she briefly reflects on Sansa and how she might have done better by her). so..... again, it does come down to self-preservation in the end, but I don't think Cersei was a two-dimensional evil kid. you can find the sense in her reasoning, which is pretty absent in what Joffrey does to the cat.

tyrion and jaime are very fucked up but they still have some kindness and empathy in them.

i personally find the cersei/her brothers dichotomies kind of frustrating cos like. not every character needs the traits of empathy and kindness. Cersei is not the only character in ASOIAF who lacks these traits. Littlefinger, Euron, Roose, Ramsay, Tywin himself, etc, all lack these traits, and yet are not afforded anything close to complexity Cersei is. she is the only POV character among these villains. and whilst I do think that the whiplash between Cersei's occasionally-played-for-laughs foolishness and her sexual trauma is sometimes verging on ill-judged, fandom should take more accountability for the extent to which they relegate Cersei to dark comic relief. she was not written as this.

and as I've said before, whilst I do think it's notable that Cersei is our primary female villain yet written as often foolish and ridiculed as such, yet male villains comparably tend to be much savvier, it still makes sense that Cersei would lack these smarts: she wasn't taught them. still, sure, to some extent I agree that GRRM should not have played this for laughs so often.

returning again to Cersei lacking empathy etc - well, you have other characters who lack evil. Brienne hasn't really got a gram of darkness in her body, yet is enormously complex in other ways. then you've got characters like Asha, who have more of a balance of the two, and yet aren't even half as complex as Cersei (despite being a POV). GRRM has not refused Cersei complexity, and he has not written her, on his own part, without empathy. we see Cersei grieve, we see Cersei traumatised, we see Cersei frightened, we see Cersei humiliated. again, as I've said before, GRRM makes us hold Cersei's cruelty in the one hand, and Cersei's pain in the other, and reckon with both at once. neither excuses the other, as they might in a lesser story - like Game of Thrones!

and i'm not going to go deep into GOT right now, but I don't agree that d&d had more respect for Cersei as a character. d&d cannot conceive of Cersei as anything besides a mother. they reduce everything about her to motherhood, and when she runs out of children, they stick another one in her. they cannot imagine what might drive a character like Cersei beyond motherhood. it is essentially the final note of her story - 'I don't want our baby to die' etc. i don't think i need to say much more to explain that I think reducing a character like book Cersei to this, is deeply misogynistic. if you want to see that misogyny in action elsewhere, see how the finale ultimately frames a dichotomy between the childless Dany, a freak tyrant, and the pregnant mother Cersei, who the writers think we'll want to escape to Pentos to survive with her baby, and who we're supposed to weep for when she doesn't make it out. and now remember what happened like. one episode before with Missandei, the last black woman on this show. d&d couldn't respect a woman if their lives depended on it

do you think cersei is a sociopath?

GRRM says she has an 'almost sociopathic' view of the world, but obviously shies away from identifying her as such, and I think he's right to - these kinds of labels are far too prescriptive when what you're trying to write is a character in a book, not an article for a medical journal.

do you agree with me?

nah not really. ultimately I think whilst Cersei is written as unabashedly evil, this doesn't mean that that evil is two dimensional. she exists on the darkest end of the spectrum because I think that is the most interesting place for her to occupy - I don't believe Cersei's story would be improved with a redemption arc, or a couple of instances where she sneaks Sansa a sweet or w/e. grey characters are interesting, yeah, but they are not invariably more interesting than those in the darkest shades, and I don't think GRRM has done Cersei an injustice by not painting her lighter.

[gatitties]

Oh, oh! I have a idea! Because i was read the new post about reader who didn't mind to eat spicy food made me giggled and gave me a new idea.

How about.. a reader, who is just popping out of nowhere?

Like every time someone doing anything or someone calls their name, they're like "Hello!" and then startling the people in the process. It would be funny!

Can the straw hats, heart pirates, and kid pirates react?

─Heart Pirates & Kid Pirates x reader

─Summary: You appear and disappear like a magician when your name is called, scaring everyone.

─Warnings: none

Strawhats ver.

Oh, I have a similar post with the strawhats, but not for the other two hehehe

─ If you're going to kill the entire crew with a heart attack, you're doing it just fine, Law doesn't even understand how you appear out of nowhere.

─ Do you have some kind of secret power that they don't know about? He really thinks about it seriously.

─ Poor Bepo, no matter how many times it happens, he'll always be startled when he does a double take and finds you in a corner where you definitely weren't just a second ago.

─ As incredible as it may seem, Shachi and Penguin can detect when and where you'll appear, as if they sense the storm brewing with your mere presence.

─ Ikkaku has scolded you so many times for scaring her in the kitchen, more than once she's hit you with a spoon accidentally just like Jean Bart, these two have fragile hearts, give them a break.

─ Law prepares a random object to teleport you somewhere else when he says your name, but you still go back to the room as if he hadn't sent you to the other end of the submarine.

─ He'll send you on all the missions that require a minimum of stealth, or simply if he wants to scare someone he doesn't like.

─ They start to think you live in the walls or something, you don't just appear out of nowhere, you also find out about all the gossip without being present (or that's what they think).

─ Sometimes they blame you if something breaks, even if you have nothing to do with it, since they assume you're everywhere like an omnipotent being, it's more likely that it's your fault.

─ Those days are a chaos of accusations to prove your innocence, because obviously it wasn't you, right? Probably not…

─ It was surprising the first few times, and yes, you scared some of them, but it's a regular thing now.

─ They don't understand where you come from, if it's a power or something, they don't question it either, but what they don't understand is why you just stare at them for a few seconds in silence before disappearing out of nowhere again.

─ Probably some staring contests with Wire until you get tired and disappear (you don't have to admit defeat if you run away before).

─ Whenever Kid needs help in his workshop he just says your name like it was a summons and there you are before he finishes saying your name.

─ Whenever they want to talk about you they call you “the-one-who-must-not-be-named” so you don't appear out of nowhere, it's very difficult to keep secrets from you when you seem to be everywhere at all times.

─ Although it is a plus point, you find out a lot of things, so you have long gossip talks with Heat and Wire.

─ Killer won't be surprised if he finds you in the kitchen at any time of the day having a small snack, you'll be gone in a blink as if you melted into the shadows before he can scold you.

─ They make bets on where or when you will appear in front of them during the day, the one who guesses the most can get out of doing chores the next day.

─ If something explodes out of nowhere, all the blame will be on you and you won't even be able to prove that it wasn't you, you can't fool Killer.

─ They definitely use you as an escape method if they are in a bind, you are a good distraction method against enemies.

[scariusaquarius]

rehab. 13.

Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Winter Soldier! Fem! Reader

Summary: While on a mission to find any more possible super soldiers that were a part of the Winter Soldier program, Steve and Bucky make a discovery in an abandoned HYDRA base that was cleared out a few years prior to their mission. They discover the Reader, a long-forgotten soldier that was still asleep within a functioning cryostasis pod; still awaiting orders. While Bucky isn't happy about it, he is put up to the challenge of helping to rehabilitate the soldier in Wakanda where she may be able to become a person again.

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A/n: Since the Avengers are all gonna be doing their own thing with each group, I want to make sure to include everyone and introduce the rest of the avengers! Also, if you enjoy my work, please consider buying me a coffee! If you would prefer to read Rehab on Archive, you may do so right HERE!

This is an au where Bucky joined the avengers but still rehabilitated in Wakanda (sometime before Infinity War [canon divergent cause NOPE]). I am NOT fluent in Russian, so I did use google translate cause I couldn't find a good translator that I trusted. If anything is wrong, PLEASE let me know!! Also, I tried to list as many warnings as possible so you know what the story will contain as chapters are posted. Stay safe!

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Genre: Slowburn, Enemies to Lovers/Friends to Lovers, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Humor, Drama, Dark Content Rated: Explicit Warning: Angst, Dark Content: Graphic Depictions of Sexual Assault, Blood and Gore, Mentions of Manipulation, Kidnapping, Canon-Typical Violence, Body Horror, Nonconsensual Body Modification/Scarring, Emotional and Physical Abuse, Mentions of Murder, Mentions of Suicidal Thoughts/Ideation, Graphic Depictions of Human Remains, Mentions of Sexual Coercion/Manipulation, Death, Misuse of Drugs/Forced Drugging, Self-Harm (Graphic Depictions and Mentions), Nightmares

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Author: ScariusAquarius

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rehab masterlist. chapter 10 / chapter 11 / chapter 12

There were voices all around her, some familiar and some not. As her head pounded with pain, the soldier was unable to open her eyes. They were so heavy, feeling as though they were like concrete weights stuck to her face, and there was a sicky sweet scent wafting into her nose.

There was an oxygen mask stuck to her face, and though the soldier wanted to tear it off, her limbs were too heavy to really move. She could hear the Fist of HYDRA speaking to someone, but she couldn't place it. All she knew was that he sounded young and sounded worried.

But why?

'Nobody would ever worry about you. You're weak. You're nothing. I don't know what Doris saw in you.'

Doris? The woman from her dream? Why was she relevant? The soldier tried to open her eyes again, but she was unsuccessful still. Her body was too heavy for it to be normal fatigue. They must be drugging her.

"What do you want me to do if something goes wrong?"

The younger man was speaking now, sounding nervous, and if the soldier listened closely, she could hear the boy shuffling from foot-to-foot with anxiety.

"I mean, if she's a super soldier like you, wouldn't she be able to break through the webs?"

"Aren't they supposed to be strong enough to hold two halves of a ship together?"

The young boy chuckled nervously, asking in a small voice.

"Please don't remind me about that. That was almost the worst day of my life."

The Fist of HYDRA just sighed before he stated.

"You'll be fine. With how much anesthetics she's been pumped with, I think she will be too drowsy to fight if she does wake up."

But that wasn't true. She was a machine. A soldier. It was in her nature to fight no matter what condition she was in. Failure was not an option.

Her fingers twitched slightly as she tried to regain movement, and it seemed as though the two men didn't notice as she began to become conscious and aware.

"Didn't Shuri state that she had removed the programming? What even is the programming? All I know is HYDRA is, like, the worst."

As the Fist of HYDRA began to go into depth about what the Winter Soldier program was and how they did the programming, the soldier couldn't help but to pause as her eyes fluttered open.

"-If you began to show signs that you were remembering your old life, they would put you in a Mind Chair and pump as much electricity into your brain as they possibly can without killing you to erase those memories."

"That's...that's horrible. I'm so sorry."

The lights above her were so blinding that she had to squeeze her eyes shut. They opened again, and she sluggishly began to move, ripping the mask off of her face. The young boy who had been speaking seemed to gasp and jump up from the fright, his red and blue suit almost an eyesore to her pounding head.

"Bucky!"

The Fist of HYDRA immediately stood up, hands in the air as if to calm her down, and she had to hold onto the side of the bed as her legs became jelly.

"Все в порядке. Ты в порядке."

She felt nauseous, bile swimming in the back of her throat, and she gripped the side of the table so tightly that she bent it within the shape of her grip.

Standing up carefully, there was a brain fog that was clouding her mind. Things looked too bright; sounds were too loud, and her head began to pound. She stumbled slightly as she stood up completely, and she hissed out.

"Нет!"

The soldier groaned and fell to her knees, and the Fist of HYDRA bravely came to her side, placing a warm hand against her back as he knelt on the ground beside her.

"Все в порядке. Вы помните что-нибудь, что произошло после моего ухода?"

For some reason that the soldier could not understand, tears began to fill her eyes. She looked away from the man with shame, whispering as her shoulders began to shake.

"Voices....people...places...Что вы со мной сделали?"

She looked back at the Fist of HYDRA and she became guarded when she remembered that the boy in red and blue was here as well. He was keeping his distance, his hands raised in a strange position, and the Fist of HYDRA said gently.

"Shuri got rid of the HYDRA programming...or, at least most of it, I think. You're no longer under HYDRA's complete control."

The soldier began to grow anxious and irritated, her hand shooting up to grip the Fist's throat as she hissed.

"Who am I if I am not HYDRA?"

The Fist was calm, his metal hand gripping her wrist tightly, and she knew deep down that she would not win a fight with the Fist of HYDRA if it came down to it.

She never could.

"If you calm down, I can tell you. We found you, (Y/n). We found who you were before you were with HYDRA."

That name. Why was he calling her that name? The soldier gripped his throat for another moment before her hand relaxed slightly, and she whispered in a broken whisper.

"Эта красивая женщина - я?"

The Fist of HYDRA nodded, whispering softly.

"Yes. The pretty woman from your dreams is you."

Suddenly, the faceless mannequins from her strange dreams began to morph into faces, a beautiful woman greeting her by the record player and an angry sneering man yelling at her to get out of his office. The soldier began to feel sick again, and she whispered softly, crying.

"I don't understand. I...I....I'm malfunctioning...my programming is flawed. I...I need to be recalibrated...reprogrammed. I don't want to remember."

In a bout of bravery, the young boy in red and blue knelt to the ground, asking her softly.

"How come you don't want to remember? Don't you want to know who your family is?"

"My only family is HYDRA!"

She threw a metal table at the boy, who yelped and shot out some strange substance that clutched onto the metal and stuck it straight to a wall. The Fist immediately stood up, standing in front of the boy protectively as he urged.

"It's okay. It's okay, we're not going to hurt you. Peter's gonna say sorry, aren't you?"

The Fist gave the boy, Peter, a firm look, and Peter looked sheepish.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you."

He then leaned in close to the Fist, hissing in exasperation.

"She just threw a whole table at my head!"

"At least it's not a knife. That wasn't very fun either."

Peter's eyes seemed to bulge out of his head, and the soldier shook her head as the pounding became worse. The soldier couldn't deal with standing anymore, so she sat down on a metal chair and clutched her head.

"(Y/n)?"

A strange feeling filled her, and the soldier looked up with confusion. Why did he call her that?

"Who is that?"

The soldier winced as the lights became unbearable, and the Fist of HYDRA looked at Peter, asking him gently.

"Can you turn the lights down low for her?"

Peter quickly jogged to a control panel on the wall, dimming the lights just enough that the pressure within her head lessened. The Fist of HYDRA carefully sat down in front of her, saying as he slid over a file to her.

"We found out who you were, (Y/n). We found who you were before you were HYDRA."

The confusion and fear spilled from her eyes as she stared at the file; stared at the pretty woman in the picture on the front, and she whispered brokenly; sounding unsure as the words sputtered out of her chapped lips like a desperate plea.

"Ты мне врешь. I was born in HYDRA. HYDRA is my only family."

The Fist shook his head before he sighed and chewed on his lip slightly, trying to figure out a different way to approach the subject before he asked the soldier.

"Do you remember what I told you before you were reactivated about how my name was given to me before I was with HYDRA; About how I had a family before HYDRA kidnapped me?"

The soldier was struggling to remember, bits and pieces of the conversation coming to mind despite the difficulty, and she nodded after a moment. The Fist replied, his expression calm.

"You had a family and a name too. You had a whole life before you were taken by HYDRA and made into a Winter Soldier. Just like how my parents named me James, your parents named you (Y/n)."

Peter asked, mostly to himself, though the Fist gave him a dirty look.

"Wait, your first name is James? Why do they call you Bucky then?"

"My middle name is Buchanan."

Peter made a face of understand, and the Fist rolled his eyes. Settling his attention back onto her, the soldier felt her body tremble uncontrollably as his body seemed to loom over her. In her mind, she was becoming a speck on the floor; an insignificant piece of trash that deserved nothing while the Fist seemed to grow a thousand times taller. His eyes were angry; his lips snarling, and the soldier began to cry; covering her face and whispering softly.

"Please stop. I'll stop remembering. I'm sorry. There are...flaws in the programming. I need to be rebooted. I must be punished."

She began to ramble, the words spilling from her lips despite the voice in her head yelling at her that she must not speak unless spoken to. She does not deserve to have a tongue in her throat for speaking out-of-line. She must shut herself up and if she cannot, she must utilize her surroundings.

"Hey, hey, slow down. Breathe, (Y/n)."

The name sparked so much confusion; so much pain within her pounding head that she could not help but to scream, lashing out and throwing her balled fists wildly.

"Stop calling me that! I have no name!"

Suddenly, that same sticky substance that had attached to the table was wrapped around her hands. The force of being hit with the web smacked the back of her hand against the wall, and she tried as hard as she could to pull away. However, she was still too weak; too panicked to think clearly.

She became frustrated and upset, kicking at the bed and screaming loudly as the flesh of her hand began to pull painfully; the web stuck on like glue. Despite the pain, however, she kept pulling her hand; even when the webs finally cut deep into her skin and blood ran down her arm.

Arms came around her, making her scream louder; fear running through her scrambled mind. This was it. She was finally going to be punished. She had been out-of-line for too long. She'd been remembering too long. They were finally going to put her in her place.

"Hey, it's okay! It's okay. Listen to my voice. Listen to me. You're okay. Follow my voice, солдат. Вы не в беде."

Tears streamed down her scarred cheeks, and the soldier was hyperventilating. She was still struggling, trying to break free of his hold, but he was much stronger than her.

He had always been much stronger. Much better. Everything that she could not be.

'You're despicable. Even the Fist of HYDRA would do better than this. Shall I call him to teach you a lesson?'

"Мне очень жаль. Прости, Кулак ГИДРЫ! Пожалуйста, не делайте мне больно. Я буду слушаться!"

Bucky swore his heart had never shattered so hard before in his life. He remembered when his mother had passed away; Rebecca too young to really understand what was going on and why their mother wasn't waking up. His father hadn't even been home that day; too busy working that Bucky had to run for a neighbor.

He remembered being scared; confused and distraught about his mother suddenly passing and the way he just couldn't understand why. Why did his mother die? Why did she have to leave them so soon? How was he going to take care of Rebecca?

That weight that had settled on his shoulders had eased when he met Steve, but that side of him that had been jaded by his mothers death and the world and the ignorance of how to care for another human being...it truly never went away.

To hear the woman in his arms plea for The Winter Soldier not to hurt her...it was almost akin to death.

"What on Earth is going on in here?!"

Shuri's voice trilled through the air, and though (Y/n) was still thrashing in his arms, Bucky let her go as his arms fell; too shocked and winded to be able to function properly. Peter took over, webbing the girl completely while giving Bucky a concerned look, and though his mouth was moving, Bucky couldn't hear a damn thing.

Please don't hurt me. Please don't hurt me. Please don't hurt me.

Fist of HYDRA. The Winter Soldier. That is who you are and who you will always be.

I'll obey!

Oh, god, Howard!

"James."

Bucky's head shook slightly as he was roused from his thoughts, and he was immediately aware of the lack of screams. Glancing down, he noticed that (Y/n) had been sedated and was completely out; webbed up and lying on her back on the ground. Her cheeks were wet, eyelashes dewed with tears, and Bucky could feel bile rising up in his stomach.

"James, I need you to focus on me, alright? Listen to me."

Shuri's voice was calming, but Bucky could only stutter out his words as the shock continued to blow through his body.

"I...I'm here. I just...I...I think I need a moment."

Bucky immediately made his way to the balcony outside the lab, breaking the door from how hard he had pushed it open, and when he got outside and around the wall, Bucky immediately braced himself against it and began to cry.

You can never escape HYDRA. Where one head falls, two shall grow back in its place.

You will always be HYDRA. Even if you escape, you will miss your time here. It will call you home whether you like it or not.

I don't care. He killed my parents.

He was hyperventilating; panicking. His hand was going numb; the tips of his fingers tingling, and he could feel the need to vomit growing. His skin was sheening with sweat, but Bucky only felt cold.

He felt the cryogenic frost crawling up his body and invading his ears and nose and mouth, and he slid to the ground, placing his hands over his head to drown out the sound of the screams; of Maria Stark's cries; of (Y/n)'s pleas.

"Um, Mr. Barnes?"

Peter's voice was gentle, though Bucky was still lost within his head. Peter shifted from foot-to-foot, unsure of what to do, so he just sat next to Bucky quietly. He stared at the ground and pursed his lips, a furrow in his brow.

Peter didn't really know how to deal with panic attacks. He could recite complex inorganic compound formulas like the alphabet and he could describe the Standard Model Lagrangian like it was another day...but Peter had never been good with mental health.

Hell, he wasn't really a star model when it came to mental health and had no room to talk, but seeing Bucky like this...to see that woman in the lab that had been so badly abused by HYDRA plea for her life...it was horrifying.

At least, it sounded like she was pleading for her life. Peter didn't really know any Russian despite Natasha teaching him a few words. Taking a deep breath, Peter spared a glance at Bucky, hearing the way his heart was starting to slow down a bit. He was patient, just sitting with Bucky quietly as the man began to come down from his panic.

Bucky's jaw clenched slightly before he looked down at the ground, wiping his eyes and cheeks, and he said softly as Peter glanced over at him with a caring expression.

"Thanks, kid. I'm sorry you had to see me like that."

Peter shook his head, replying carefully.

"Oh, it's not a problem, Mr. Barnes. Sometimes we...sometimes we need a friend, and sometimes we need to be a friend. It's what we do. We help people."

Bucky nodded carefully, muttering.

"I see why Steve likes you, kid."

"Captain America likes me? That's so cool."

Bucky snorted, and Peter chuckled in embarrassment. The boy then paused, looking nervous before he asked.

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

Bucky replied without missing a beat.

"Don't push it."

"Understood."

Bucky shook his head before he watched Peter get up and dust his suit off. Bucky was quiet, just observing the kid for a moment, and he turned his gaze away when Peter stated.

"I'll go back inside and check on her. I'm here for you if you need it, Mr. Barnes. Honest."

Bucky nodded, and he called after Peter before Peter could get into the lab again.

"Hey, Queens."

"Yes, sir?"

Bucky almost bristled at the way Peter called him 'sir' and instead retorted with a pointed look.

"It's Bucky. Mr. Barnes was my dad."

Peter smiled gently, nodding his head before he said.

"I'll make sure to remember that, Bucky."

-

STORY NOTES: The soldier has woken up despite the anesthetics going through her body, possibly due to her heightened metabolism adapting and gaining tolerance to the drug, and she is aware that Bucky and another person are in the room with her, who turns out to be Peter Parker aka Spiderman. They are conversing on what to do if she wakes up, and Bucky makes a comment about the incident with the ferry in Spiderman: Homecoming.

Peter then asks about the Winter Soldier programming, in which Bucky explains the process and what it was and how they would take the memories of their subjects if they started to remember their old life. At this time, the soldier finally gets up, and Peter alerts Bucky. While the soldier is trying to orient herself, Bucky tries to comfort her, but the soldier is unwilling to accept comfort.

The soldier asks what Shuri had done to her, and Bucky explains that Shuri had removed most of the Winter Soldier programming that it would no longer affect the soldier. The soldier is distraught by the loss of her HYDRA identity, and she makes a comment internally about how if she wanted to fight Bucky, she wouldn't be able to as she never could, implying that she knew Bucky when he was the Winter Soldier as well. Bucky takes that time to introduce her name to her and let her know that he found her previous identity.

(Y/n) becomes distraught, and though Peter tries to ask her about her feelings and family, (Y/n) lashes out and tells Peter that her only family is HYDRA. She lashes out, and Peter uses his web to detain her. She suddenly has a lapse in her memory when Bucky calls her by her given name, and Bucky tries to tell her that they found out who she was before HYDRA again. He shows her the file, and (Y/n) is perturbed by seeing a picture of the woman she had seen in the mirror.

Bucky reaffirms to her that her name is (Y/n) (L/n) and she had a whole family before HYDRA, and she begins to panic so badly that she begins to hallucinate. Bucky calls her by her name again, and the soldier finally snaps, trying to lash out at him again. She begins to have a meltdown, and though Bucky tries to comfort her by holding her, the soldier has an auditory flashback of when she was told she was going to be punished by the Winter Soldier.

She begs Bucky not to hurt her, that she is sorry and she will comply, and Bucky is devasted. He recalls how he had felt when his mother had passed away, and he relates the feeling to (Y/n) begging him not to hurt her to the feeling of death. Shuri comes in, asking what is going on, and Peter finally completely webs (Y/n) when Bucky becomes too shocked to keep a firm hold on her.

Bucky begins to have a panic attack and exits out of the lab, and Peter follows after him to make sure that Bucky is okay. Peter thinks about how he doesn't really know how to deal with mental health properly and that seeing Bucky in such a state of disarray and hearing (Y/n) plead for her life was scary for him to witness.

Peter chooses to sit with Bucky quietly, and Bucky is thankful. Peter reassures Bucky that he doesn't mind helping him and asks if Bucky would like to talk about it, and Bucky tells Peter not to push his luck. After Peter tells Bucky he is going to check on (Y/n) and calls him Mr. Barnes, Bucky tells him to call him by his nickname, implying that they have further their friendship. End scene.

TRANSLATIONS

Все в порядке. Ты в порядке. - It's okay. You're okay.

Все в порядке. Вы помните что-нибудь, что произошло после моего ухода? - It's okay. Do you remember anything that happened after I left?

Что вы со мной сделали? - What have you done to me?

Эта красивая женщина - я? - That beautiful/pretty woman is me?

Ты мне врешь. - You're lying to me.

солдат - soldier

Вы не в беде. - You're not in trouble.

Мне очень жаль. - I'm so sorry

Прости, Кулак ГИДРЫ! - I'm sorry, Fist of HYDRA. (This translated directly as "I'm sorry, HYDRA Fist")

Пожалуйста, не делайте мне больно. Я буду слушаться! - Please don't hurt me. I'll obey!

TAGLIST: @tilldeathripsusapart @vicmc624 @mgchaser @aash3 @samfunko @seventeen-x @valckenaux @babybeeelle @sc4rrc @cjand10

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hi :) Before I ask my question I just wanted to say that I love how you characterize the twst boys in your writing and always take the effort of digging deep into these extremely (sometimes almost mind blowingly) complicated characters.  

So I am one of those people who loves making and seeing art of the twst boys genderbent. As I sometimes do admittedly lament twisted wonderlands lack of female cast members at times (though I do understand that having an all male cast is part of the games genre!) 

Anyway I was just wondering if the twst cast members were girls, would that in any way change the character development and dynamic of Epel and Vil in book 5? Because a large part of Epel's character development centres around his narrow, traditional ideas of gender roles and his internal need to feel “tough and manly”. Then Vil teaches him that femininity does not necessarily mean weakness and blah blah we know the story. Long story short, if Epel was a girl would that change her views on strength in any way? Would she feel the same need to be super tough and manly like her male counterpart? Would this change rewrite Epel's character arc entirely? Just wanted to know what you think. 

Hello and thank you for the compliment ^^ I work hard on my posts but especially on the analysis ones so I'm always really happy to see such positive reception to those efforts!

I love seeing Twst genderbend AUs too :DD My favorite interpretations have to be by tribbutribby (aka bunnyshadeow), who has made a few zines (Twisted Bimboland) with that theme in mind. I love how they don't just draw "the Twst boys, but with boobs"; they thought through every character and how they would actually be as a woman, from the designs to the personalities. For example, their fem!Leona has short hair because female lions don't have manes and their fem!Jamil is described as a cool onee-san type, which totally fits with what we know about Jamil. I also love that they actually have a variety in body types! Fem!Riddle is short and flat, fem!Floyd is tall and lanky, fem! Azul is more plump, fem!Jack has thunder thighs, etc. Highly recommend their works, CANNOT RECOMMEND THEIR WORKS ENOUGH!!!

If NRC were an all-girls school, I think the conflict between Epel and Vil in book 5 would have to be considerably rewritten. We could still explore gender identity and expression, but it would have to be framed differently because of Epel and Vil, the main players, being women and not men. I guess it would still be possible to have Epel have outdated views on gender roles (tradwife!Epel?????????), but it doesn't make much sense since... Epel's technically at an elite school instead of preparing to be a wife or something. That might also lead to a very stereotypical message with Vil coming in and telling Epel "actually, you can girlboss too".

It might be interesting to see an interpretation in which Epel is forced to live by gender roles, but then she tries to rebel against it + disparages femininity by being a tomboy?? And then the lesson Vil ends up instilling in her is that femininity shouldn't be underestimated, it can be a strength too. That would be similar to the original message imparted onto Epel, and I think it would be more nuanced and less predictable than the girl power version.

[valentine-cafe]

Any tips for those who want to create ocs/ start writing? I have been thinking about writing for a long time but Im stuck on where to start

﹙ 🍒. ﹚ ─── Hello darling! I hope this finds you well. I'll start with the oc question and then transcend into where to start with writing. Buckle up this ended up being so much longer than anticipated.

Tips for OC CREATION

Get inspiration. This seems like an obvious one, but you'll be surprised how much I forget to do this at times. Start with a small idea. For example, you want to make a baker oc? Pinterest is your best friend. Make a board, start saving everything to do with baking; whether you have any other concrete ideas or not. Just start saving images. You'll start stringing together a theme as you go. Maybe you'll discover that this baker really loves flowers. Which then comes the quesion - why do they love flowers? Or maybe you'll discover that this baker has a bakery along the seaside. Once more the question comes up - why? From here you'll be able to create a blurp for your character and a basis as a whole. Remember, don't force inspiration! This can be tricky, but let it come naturally. 

Don't be afraid to play around with ideas. Sometimes we tend to focus too much on 'things ,making sense'. This robs a lot of the creative process. While yes certain things should make sense, but don't hold each and every one of your ideas to this standard. Throw a bunch of ideas to the wall and see which ones stick! You never know what unique idea you could end up creating. Even if they don't make sense at first. Just jot them all day and find a way to loop them. As stated, some ideas may stick and some may not. 

Get an appearance. I find that figuring out how a character looks after your basis really helps with envisioning them more. Note: I only look for appearances after I have my basis and general ideas as listed above. Because this helps the appearance process. Remember our flower loving baker on the seaside from earlier? Well, maybe their eyes are blue like the ocean. Maybe their skin is sunkissed because of the warm weather. Maybe they keep their hair short too because of this. Of course, you still have free reign here too. Don't be afraid to give your character some bizzare quirks. Different colours eyes? Hair? Peculiar birthmarks? Go for it. Don't listen to the people who call 'mary sue' every left and right. 

Personality. Chances are with all the steps above you have a general consensus of the personality. But don't just shallow it out to the generals! List down positive, neutral and negative traits. Even morally good characters have negative traits. Even morraly bad characters can have positive traits. Neutral traits are also very important. Also note that you can twist a positive or negative trait to create something different. The positive trait "compassion" can quickly turn sour if the character confuses compassion for letting people walk all over them. The negative trait "deceitful" can turn positive if the character is in a story where deceit protects their general wellbeing as well as their loved ones. I'd suggest checking out this post of 600 personality traits. 

Character quirks. Character quirks are what make your character feel alive. This can be something as simple as: 'he's a midnight snacker and always needs some extra crackers at home because of this.' Play around, mix and match, you'll be able to create even more story with quirks! For example, maybe 'she adores nature and makes sure to thank it whenever she takes from it' why does she do that? Was she taught that? Is it to do with her family? Occupation? Beliefs? I'd suggest checking out this post of 170 character quirks.

Give. Your. Character. Conflict. I'm not saying throw them round the wringer ( although if that's your thing, by all means. Do it. I do it sooo much ). Even if your character is just the casual slice of life character, they need to have something that drives them! Any sort of conflict, big or small, can make a huge impact on making your character feel real. It can be something as simple as 'they are a writer, but have severe procrastination'. You don't have to give them life-changing struggles, but even just a few make the difference. If there is one rule I follow in my character writing journey: to see the beauty of gemstones, you must break them. Much like a gemstone that we break open, when we put a character on a low, aw spectrum - we see what they are all about. Admittedly, I take that saying to a very extreme level but I understand that most simply do not wish to do that. That is perfectly fine. Just weigh your character down in some way. 

Give your character a way of speaking. This seems small but it is one of the most important ones to me. Note down how your character speaks. What language do they speak? How do they speak it? Is there slang? Do they have a certain word or phrase that they repeat? Long sentences or short sentences? Flowery speech or blunt? This will all depend on all of the points above. Accumulate them and give your character a unique voice. This will help you individualise them. It also makes it easier to write with them. Adds so much personality flare!

Have fun! Another one that sounds obvious but can very easily be overlooked. Make sure that you have fun through the process. If the character isn't working out for you or is frustrating, rip it apart and start afresh! There's no shame in that. Howl and I have been planning this book series for almost one and a half years now and do you know how many characters we had to tear down and rebuild? Seong-Jin 9948e was one of them. I hated how his character was, it wasn't working out. I wasn't having fun with him. I had to tear him down to the very bone and reset him. Now? I adore him. You're not obligated to see all of your ideas through. If something's not working out, it's time for a new canvas! At the end of the day, make sure you are creating characters for you that you will love and have fun while doing it. Even with the characters you 'hate' because of morality or whatever it may be. Have fun with them. Have fun in general. 

Phewwww okay. . . now lets get to getting started with writing. 

Tips for getting started with WRITING

Ask yourself the most important question. Why do I want to start writing? It can be simple, it can be grand, regardless of what it is, it's valid. Identify it. Write it down. Just know why you wanna write. That's gonna be your key motivator for when things get rough and cloudy. 

More questions. What do I want to write about? How do I plan on writing this? Identify these key questions as well. Even if they seem obvious, identifying them is a very big step. You'll be able to make your game plan from here. 

Pick a place to write. I'm talking about document/site. There are various options. Howl and I typically use notion to organise and format our writing. There are of course many other options. Microsoft word, Google docs, Grammarly docs, Reedsy.com, hell - even basic notes. Choose somewhere where you will feel comfortable. Play around a bit. 

Write your ideas down. Even if your memory is tip-top, write that idea down the second you get it! Make a folder, make a notebook, do it digitally or not. Just write it down. Have a list of different ideas, even if they seem bareboned. Just write. Them. Down. You'll thank me later. This will be your pretty little writing bank where you can pull ideas out when needed.

Develop the ideas. Blurp them. Mindmap. Get those brain juices pumping! Write down random points and find a way to interconnect them. Even if they do not make sense. Once again, you'll be surprised just how much you can work out of your mind by simply scribbling everything that pops into your brain.

Inspiration is key. As I noted above, inspiration is very important. If anything, I suggest merging this with the previous tip. Go to pinterest, search up writing prompts on different platforms. Combinem link, do what you must. Throw everything into a large mixing pot and stir it up! Have pinterest boards even for you smaller oneshots if that will help you. Llisten to music, this is where majority of my inspiration comes from. Do the things that get your creativity flowing. It might seem cliche or dramatic but on the music standpoint? Classical music is your best friend. It stimulates a certain part of your brain that reallu gets things kicking. 

Practice writing. From my own experience, I have noticed that many writers including myself at times, forget to practice writing. This stems from the idea that you consistently plan and think out your ideas, fully flesh them out and then assume this will see you through. Another big misconception is that simply reading will make you a better writer. While yes, reading is an amazing way to improve your vocabulary, grammar and develop your style from your favourite writers. . . it is not practically practising writing. Here's a writing practice: get yourself a document. Or a paper. Whatever you see fit. Look around you. List down the things around you. Objects, the world out your window. Write about their shapes, their colours. Write what you smell, what you hear, what you see and feel. Make a story from all of these things. This practice in particular will not only be a great starter, but will also help you practise writing with the five senses. There are numerous practises you can pick up. Such as writing a scenario from a song or writing about a certain routine of your character. Identify your weak points and write pieces around them. You must write in order to practice. Seems obvious, right? ( haha ). But we tend to take our work or scheduled writing and assume that as practice. While it can very much be, you're gonna need that extra input!

Research. To tie in with the previous note. Research will aid your weak points. As writers, we write about experiences, about the world, actions. We cannot allow ourselves to write what we do not know. Now, that by now means equates to you studying every topic you can find under the sun, rather, research when necessary. Are you writing a fanfic where the character is of a different ethnicity? Do a little brush up on their culture and some facts around the ethnic background. A piece about a flourist? Learn a little about some flowers. Do you struggle with dialogue? Listen to people speak ( DO NOT LOOK AT MOVIES OR TV SHOWS. ). Listen to people in reality speak. See how they talk. The beautiful thing about writers is that we write about all sorts of corners of life. And so we must understand life itself. 

Routine. I know a lot of us dread schedules. So do I. But this isn't a schedule - it's a routine. Make a habit out of writing. Even if it's simply twenty minutes a day if you cannot sit down and work on what you want. Even if it's just practice. Please, find the time to write at least a little every day. Where you have time, block it out for writing. Make a tummer. Do writing sprints. Make a flow. Like any art form, it must be done consistently. 

No. Forcing. I know this may sound counterimtuitive to the last post but darling. Do not overwork yourself. Do not force yourself. There is a difference between holding yourself accountable to your routine and being hard on yourself. Identify your limits. Know when enough is enough. Take a breather, get some water, close your eyes, walk outside. Don't make this a chore. Again, it is art. Even if it is your job. It is still art, and art is freedom. 

Finish your WIPS. DON'T RUN FROM YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES. Yes, I know that I said do not force yourself, but this is another fine line that you must find balance in. I understand the issue of an idea losing its spark, I do. But hold yourself accountable at times. Complete your work in progresses. Your passion project, that fic you're holding off. At least try to. This will help in the long run of completing writing projcts in general. Because if you do this long enough, you'll develop it into a habit, trust me. I know this all too well. If you have an idea? Write it out! Don't post anything about it until you have all of it written out. This can also help. At times we get too excited with sharing the idea and get lost in all the highs that. . . the idea eventually falls short. And then we feel guilt for not seeing it through. Remember, consistency is key.

Write for youself. Everyone loves validation. I certainly do. Everyone wants to hear a - 'this is so amazing!' However, once more, we have another fine line. Make sure that you are writing for yourself. Make sure that what you are writing is something that aligns with you. Even if you are a fanfic writer taking requests. Find essence in that request and tune it so that you enjoy writing it. Even if you are the only person writing for this specific trope, a specific character, an au, whatever it may be. Write it. Get it out. Have fun with it. Post it. Not only are you doing yourself justice by expressing your creativity, but in the long run - you never know who might need that piece. You never know who might stumble upon it and have their day brighten up. Don't care about how people may receive it, don't care about the absurdity of it. Write it. And have fun while writing it. 

 

I really hope that this helped! I plan on making a little post like this for reader insert writers in particular because it is something that has been on my mind. . . remember, in whatever you do - have fun!

[shanefuckingscott]

Nights like this...

Imagine coming home late at night to Sevika

>>>>>>>>>>

12:39am (Sevika)

- I'm home, honey

- Where are you?

- Why aren't you home yet?

12:47am (You)

- Oh, sorry baby, I forgot to update. I might come home a little late tonight. My boss is making me work over time.

12:50am (Sevika)

- He can't do that.

- I want you homeee

- I'm gonna kill your boss.

12:51am (You)

- I know baby, but he really needs me.

- But don't worry, I'll come home as soon as possible. I just have to finish a couple things.

- If you're tired for work, I understand, you can sleep now, and I'll just cuddle you when I get home. I have my keys anyway ❤️

12:55am (Sevika)

- No. I'll wait for you baby, okay? What do you wanna eat?

12:57am (You)

- Oh, Sevvy bear, no need. I just need you cuddled up in bed with me when I get home.

12:59am (Sevika)

- Bullshit. You want chinese?

1:01am (You)

- Yes please.

>>>>>>>>>>>

You finally get to go home, but you drive by a near gasoline station to buy some beverages for you and your wife.

*Click* You send here a selfie of you waiting in line with the six-pack you bought for you and Sevika to share.

2:12am (You)

- Sent a photo.

2:14am (Sevika)

- Sent a photo.

- Date night?

Sevika had sent a photo back of her with the food she bought that had just arrived a couple minutes prior.

2:17am (You)

- You better not start eating without me

- 👹

2:18am (Sevika)

- Of course not, silly girl. This is for me AND my wife, after all. ❤️

2:21am (You)

- Aww, shucks.

- Just wait a bit, I'm driving back home

2:22am (Sevika)

- ❤️

>>>>>>>>>>>

You pull up to the drive way, and make your way to the door. You grab your keys, and open the door to see your wife waiting for you on the couch watching your favourite show. "Ugh, Sevika, you better not start watching ahead of me!!!" You say, childishly. She chuckles, and walks up to you, giving you a peck on the forehead. "Not, just catching up. Missed you." You look to the floor, trying to hide your blush from your wife, but you know she could see right though you. "I missed you too, babe" You say, grabbing her hand, and kissing her knuckles.

You take off your shoes, and your bra to come sit next to your wife on the couch as she motions you to. "Come, eat with me, honey." She says, as she opens a beer, and hands a spoon to you. "God, I've been starving all day!" You say, stretching your arm, and finally digging in.

You guys sit there for a while enjoying the meal, and the show you guys watch. You finally finish your food, and cuddle up next to Sevika. 2 beers in, and you already feel a little buzzed, probably because you're stressed all.day, and sleepy, or maybe your alcohol tolerance have just gotten weaker over the years. But you feel a sense of calmness, as you feel Sevika's body pressed onto yours. She's truly yours, and you're truly hers. All hers.

"Hmm, how was work, babe?" You ask her. "The usual. Except,—tsk, Silco asked me to braid Jinx's hair earlier. Man can't do shit himself sometimes. Threatened him I'd quit, and he shut up bout it." She laughs, while she's reminiscing about earlier events. "What bout you, baby?" She asks back, as she caresses your face, and gives you a kiss on the nose. "Hmm, nothing much, just a lot of work. A coworker asked me to share drinks with her right before I was about to get off my shift." You laugh, telling her about your silly coworker. She didn't find it all too silly, though. She raised an eyebrow at you "Oh? What'd you say" She asked, skeptically. "Oh, I told her 'my wife is waiting for me at home' heh. I know how much my wife lives my undivided love and attention once in a while, right?" You boop her, and kiss her teasingly. "Hmph—Damn right I do." She says proudly, and she kisses you back.

One thing led to another, you start heavily making out on the couch like a bunch of horny teenagers, and she slides a hand up your shirt. You smile at the kiss, and pull back. "As much as I love where this is going—" You check your watch. "It's now 3:40 in the morning." Your remind her with a little chuckle. "But we don't have work tomorrow!!!" She rather childishly. You both giggle at each other, and stick to leaving pecks, and kisses to eachothers' faces. "You wanna sleep like this?" She asks noticing you slowly start to drift to sleep. "Hmm, as long as I'm on top of you, we could be at a park bench for all I care" You smile, with your eyes closed, already ready to fall asleep. She chuckles and kisses your hair, and she gets a blanket, and pulls it over the both of you. "Goodnight, baby." She says, kissing your head once more. "G'night. I lub you" You murmur to her chest

"I love you more, my princess. Have a good rest."

>>>>>>>>>>

I AM NOT A WRITER!!!

Hope I did well for my first time, I wrote this 3 hours ago, and I spent the whole time after debating on whether I should post or not.

If y'all ask, I'll probably do more. I'm just testing out the waters if I'm cut out for this or not

This is my first ever fic, please be nice 😔✊️

[classicintp]

This is going to be a long read, a thank you letter to @thelastflyingfuck . no common triggers inside that I'm aware of.

I posted the initial post five and half years ago after a 6 month period of grief following my wife basically emotionally breaking up with me. I am not totally blameless, but I have always gone so far out of my way for her that 6 months later I still felt like I didn't deserve it. It's always difficult to deal with the feeling that you're being treated poorly by someone you like or love, but it was so much worse knowing that she wasn't intentionally trying to do that. She isn't a bad person, she's never schemed against me, and what she was doing was a really healthy and good thing that ultimately helped dig her out of the worst trenches of clinical depression and I think I knew that.

When I posted this, that I did not feel very loved, I couldn't find the gall to ask my few friends for emotional support. I felt so desperate for someone to just tell me they appreciated me, and I couldn't bring myself to bother any of them with it even though I knew so clearly that they would absolutely want me to say something. If I asked them, at the drop of a hat my friends would shower me with genuine appreciation because of how much they do appreciate me against how infrequently I want their expression and how unabashedly direct I am when I want it. It was the exact situation they trust I would say something about and I just couldn't. I don't know if it's because it was a deeper kind of hurt because it was my wife or if I was angry and resentful at her and ashamed because I personally knew she wasn't doing it on purpose. She wasn't being abusive, she was trying to survive and I knew it and I resented her anyway even if I was keeping it to myself.

I posted that I didn't feel very loved because I thought if I admitted it out loud where people could hear or read I could maybe take the next step tomorrow and tell one of my friends afterwards. By posting it I knew I would maybe get some mutuals asking if I wanted to talk, I really didn't hope for or expect anyone to go out of their way to give a poignant response to help me feel better, I just wanted to make myself more comfortable with asking my offline peers for the same support I offer to them, and instead I got this reply. I don't know if you feel like it wasn't much but I needed it, it was more than enough to pull me out of it that night, and every few weeks I would read it again to help prevent episodes of paralyzing grief (as it turns out, I was actually having full blown silent panic attacks, which I'd never heard of because I am not someone who has panic attacks). By the beginning of February, just before COVID started getting recognized, I talked to my doctor and started taking a mood stabilizer (for other reasons too), and I have been fine since. 

I would like to think that if you hadn't sent your reply I still would have eventually talked to my doctor and gotten the medication I needed, but I do know that at the very very least it prevented potentially 3 months of panic attacks, and at most it convinced me to seek professional help that I may not have sought out otherwise. You dared offer kindness to a stranger, sometimes nothing comes of it but you offered anyway, and I have appreciated it for 5 and a half years, I hope I never forget to appreciate it. Thank you again.

i do not feel very loved

[jweekgoji]

Hi, if you have time, energy and motivation for this, then please write a sequel on yandere!tfrid2015.

Yandere!TfRID2015/Reader [hcs]

tw: nsf/w(-ish) headcanons so minors don't read, possessiveness, praise kink, size kink, power dynamics, marking. word count: ~820 a/n: it has been in my drafts since summer so a good time to finally finish it.

Bumblebee

This Bumblebee is such an interesting character for me, mainly because he is finally taking the serious role in the series. Due to a lot of responsibilities with his own team (newbies, a half-functioning minicon, a clumsy cute dinobot!) and constant Decepticons' attacks. He puts up with a lot of stress. 🐝 probably prefers soft moments of intimacy (honestly, I can't even imagine yan!🐝 being violent at all); maybe even let you do the job while he can just relax and finally forget about controlling everything and everyone. He is vocal, though he would probably try to put his own servo over his mouth, mainly because he's still a bit shy that someone might hear him. I mean, looking back at where they 'live'...good luck.

This Bumblebee probably has a praise kink, and he would absolutely MELT when you call him 'sir'. It's just something that gets him going even when he's too tired to even move a finger.

Respect, respect, he likes it! Whether you're the one receiving pleasure, whining and accidentally moaning the soft 'lieutenant!' during it, or holding him down, telling Bumblebee how good he is, such a good and caring leader...your poor lieutenant Bee! You're probably putting a lot of dirty and unnecessary thoughts in his processor.

Grimlock

Grimlock absolutely knows how good he is. He also absolutely understands what role he has in the team. Muscles. And he has no shame when it comes to his size! He is used to bots around him being annoyed when he accidentally breaks something or bumps into stuff, the 🦖 gets a little confused when he meets someone who's...into it? I think he would probably be into size kink when his partner shows that they love how big he is! But probably a little worried since he doesn't want to hurt you. Is he doing well with using his sharp digits inside you? Grimlock doesn't want to hurt his sparkmate!!

Despite having an intimidating look, he is a massive dork (affectionately) who is totally in love with his partner. That's why Grimlock being responsible big dinobot would always make sure you're satisfied first! He is still reluctant about doing it in his dino mode, but he might take this challenge only if you would be on top of him. Otherwise, it would be...awkward.

Sideswipe

Young, arrogant, and painfully determined when it comes to a good fragging. At first glance, you might think he's incredibly experienced, and he'll pretend he is until it comes to a moment of intimacy between you. An extremely confident bot will start to blush and hide his face as soon as you straddle him, and no matter how hard he tries to squeeze out a smirk, it's hard not to notice the little shiver that runs through his body.

But a little determination with you, and you see the old Sideswipe again. He will tease and try to coax a reaction out of you, but only because he longs for you to finally snap and give him a good spanking. He really is into being tamed by his sparkmate, especially if they're better than him in everything.

Strongarm

Sometimes she talks about Cybertronian rules so much, you wonder if she mutters them even when she's asleep? Strongarm always wants what is best for her loved one, so it is no surprise that she shared with you everything she knows.

Strongarm very well mirrors Sideswipe, but in everything Sideswipe is cocky and teasing, Strongarm is cautious and responsible. Sure, she has her own moments, but Primus help her! She totally can't help when you try to distract her whenever she gives you a lecture. Everything you do seems to catch her attention. The way you look at her, or how you bite your lip when thinking about something... It is probably very, very wrong and unprofessional when you try to seduce her, calling her by the title and playing as if you're one of the criminals she caught. This will not affect her results, right?

Steeljaw

Scratching, lots of scratching. The cunning wolfticon is not so gentle at all, not to imagine, if he's obsessed with his darling. I'm just very sorry for their paint job. It must be so tiring polishing your armor and fixing the small scratches around the insides of your thighs and hips every single time you two decide to get intimate together. Scratching is not only his way of separating himself from the former fraction but a way of marking someone. A three simple but a little too deep mark on your shoulder is now a longtime reminder of who you belong to.

But it doesn't mean it doesn't work both ways. If 🐺 is in the right mood, with his tail wagging behind his back and his spike slamming into you so deep it makes you seem stars, he will probably encourage you to leave some marks on him as well.

[artfightdramaconfessions]

I'm autistic and I have a really hard time expressing my feelings sometimes. I always say "thank you" to everyone who makes art for me and always try to add at least something about what I like about the piece. "I like how you shaded this piece!", "I love the way you drew her eyes!", "It looks really cool how you styled him!" etc. so it doesn't come off as just a generic copy/pasted "thanks I guess" because I do genuinely like these pieces.

But growing up I would always get shat on by my family for being "ungrateful" because I'd open up bday/Christmas presents and then basically react the same way. "Oh wow! This is that book I wanted! Thanks so much!" But because I wasn't jumping up and down, screaming and crying so hard I threw up because I was so happy and grateful to have this gift, I'd get labeled as "ungrateful". And because of that experience, even with me making that addition, I can't help but feel like people are reading it the same way sometimes. ;v;

But as I've gotten older, I've learned to ignore those feelings more. Sure, there are going to be assholes every now and then who are going to think I'm being "ungrateful" for not writing a 10-page essay on how much I love the art they made, but if they're going to get that upset at a simple "thank you", then that's their problem to deal with. I don't join Art Fight to seek validation from others and I shouldn't expect others in general to have joined for that reason either. As long as I am saying "thank you" and acknowledging the time and effort those artists put into drawing my characters, I think that should be good enough! After all, there's hundreds of thousands of characters on Art Fight, and they chose mine out of them all; that's pretty cool that I was able to inspire them like that!

But I guess in the end what I'm trying to say is to not get discouraged or feel like you're being ungrateful for not writing 10,000 word essays on how much you love the art you've gotten; a simple "thank you" is good enough and anyone who says otherwise is being a dick. And for the people who are getting upset that they "only" got a simple "thank you" and nothing more, consider that they struggle with expressing themselves like me? They might be mentally freaking out about how cool your piece was, but they don't know how to express that to you. Not getting 12 paragraphs of them gushing about the piece doesn't mean that they hate it or dislike it either.

(please keep me on anon)

.