#and so was uncomfortable with women’s attention despite being an adult

[daydreamerdrew]

Shazam! (2023) #4

surprisingly the first bit of this main plot that I’ve liked. not really interested in Billy’s empowering gods being upset with him as a concept in the first place, nor how they’ve been messing with him specifically throughout this book, but I think this being Zeus’s contribution is a good idea (though it creates a situation that’s soo backwards from standard Pre-Crisis characterization), and I really like that it’s used to the end here to have Billy and the Captain be separate enough entities that they could be in conflict with one another.

[asirensrage]

Dealing with Unwanted Attention - The Hashira

An exploration of how the Hashira (+bonus) help you deal with unwanted attention from a neighbour.

Modern!AU!Demon Slayer (and female!reader).

Adult!Hashira (except for Muichiro and Tanjiro and co who are all teens)

Rating: T

Pairings: Nothing explicit but suggestive... (aside from Tengen&wives)

Warning: swearing, some violence/threats, mention of possible stalking (they've been staring at them for a while), slight poisoning, neighbour being a creep, mention of them wanting to watch women make out.Un-beta'd.

Word count: ~ 4800

Notes: Based on true events (mainly the neighbour staring and stopping the reader to confess their feelings). I wasn't planning on writing this in 2nd person pov, but it kept trying to change into it as I wrote, then when I was trying to choose between 2nd and 3rd, my friend chose 2nd and a random wheel picker chose 2nd...so I gave in to the universe. This got long. Enjoy!

Please let me know what you think and if I got the characterizations right. One of my fave lines I've written is in this, see if you can guess lol.

What they arrive to:

You try to be polite to your neighbours. There’s no need to be rude, even if you’d rather be left alone by them, but you didn’t expect it to lead to this. You know the man has been watching you. You could feel his eyes on you when you were outside and he was on his balcony, but you’ve never said more than a thank you to him for holding open the door for you so you’re not entirely sure how you’re in this mess. 

He’s confessing to you. This man that you’ve never officially met until right now, who might actually be younger than you, who is telling you he’s an alcoholic but that he’ll change. For you. How does he think this is appealing? You’re trying to find an exit, you don't want to be completely rude since you live in the same building and you’re likely going to see him again, but you want out. Now.

The reactions:

Sanemi

“Who the fuck is this?”

You let out a breath at the voice, relief setting in deep in your bones. “Sanemi,” you turn with a smile, grateful for his timing. 

He’s not looking at you. His eyes are on the man standing in front of you, who’s still trying to reach out to touch you. Again. Sanemi moves, stepping forwards until he’s in front of you, blocking the man from your view. He stares at you for a moment, taking stock of the relief he can practically feel radiating from you. “Are you ready to go?” he asks. You don’t have any plans, but you don’t care. You’ll follow him anywhere right now. 

“Yeah. Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“Tch. You should be,” he says. He sounds irritated but you know him better by now. 

“Excuse me,” the man behind him interrupts. “We’re in the middle of something.”

You watch as Sanemi’s expression shifts into something slightly murderous as he slowly turns to look at the other man. “Did I fucking ask?” The man steps back and Sanemi takes the motion to move forward, getting into his personal space like he tried to get into yours. “You know him?” Sanemi directs the question to you despite not looking back. 

“He lives here.” 

“I’m introducing myself,” the man says. “We’ll be friends.”

“Friends?” Sanemi scoffs. “She has enough friends.” He steps forward again, forcing the man back. “You ever make her uncomfortable again or even try to touch her again, I’ll break your fucking hands, got it?” 

“Uh, yeah.” 

“Good. Fucking creep,” Sanemi turns back to you, ignoring him. “Come on.” He waits for you to move, keeping himself between you as he leads you away from the building. “He ever bothers you again, you tell me.”

You grin up at him. “I will. Thank you.” 

“You just got lucky I showed up.”

“...why did you come by?” 

He doesn’t answer. 

Shinobu

“My my, what’s this?” 

You turn to look at the voice, relief setting in that at least you won’t have to do this alone. Shinobu doesn’t offer you a hug, but she stands next to you, glancing at the man before looking back at you. “New friend?” Shinobu asks, a light smile on her face. 

You know better than to assume that your friend is being polite. “A neighbour,” you confirm, ignoring the flash of anger you catch on the man’s face. Great. Another thing to deal with. 

Shinobu hums lightly before she turns to the man. “Is there something you needed?” 

The man blatantly looks over her before smiling. “I am introducing myself. Hopefully, we can be friends. All of us.” He is either unaware of the danger the small woman presents or ignores it. Either one marks him as an idiot. 

“Oh? Are you incapable of making friends?” 

He blinks in surprise and you know he’s unsure whether or not to take offence. Shinobu has a way of saying things in her light voice that most men don’t realize are as cruel as she intends them to be. “What?”

“Are you unable to make friends?” she asks again, smile still in place. “I assume that’s why you’re cornering a woman who’s clearly not interested. It’s a bit pathetic, don’t you think?” 

“Pathetic?” he catches the insult and scowls at your friend. 

“Yes,” Shinobu nods. “Does that make you angry? There are ways to fix it, that don’t involve my friend.” 

“I’m not pathetic! I was–” he’s cut off as he reaches forward. Shinobu’s hand grabs his wrist before he can reach you. He tries to pull back and frowns slightly as her nails scratch him as he pulls away. “I was introducing myself,” he continues. 

“Then you’re done and now you can leave,” Shinobu nods. He looks as though he’s going to protest but he sways slightly before blinking rapidly. 

“Did you do something?” you ask Shinobu, who looks at you innocently. You know better though. 

“Hmm…it might be a reaction to the latest experiment. Perhaps it got on my nails. I’m sorry,” she smiles at the man. “You should be fine with some rest. It’s not nearly enough to be fatal.” 

The man pales. “What?”

“You should go,” Shinobu says. “Unless you’re willing to be a test subject. I’m sure no one will miss you if you’ve cornered women before. Perhaps you should be more careful, no?” 

The man basically runs from her and you watch as he leaves. 

“What was really on your nails?” you ask, looking at Shinobu. 

“A mild paralytic. He’ll survive,” she says. “I came to ask if you wanted to join me for dinner?”

“After that? Absolutely.” 

Gyomei

Someone calls your name and before you can even turn to look, you see the man in front of you blanch. You know the voice and it’s entertaining to see firsthand how intimidated someone can be by your friend behind you. Especially when you know that he’s the kindest one of you all. 

“Are you alright?” 

“Gyomei,” you greet warmly. “What are you doing here?” 

“I came to see if you would join me for the afternoon. Are you busy?” 

You look at your neighbour who is still staring at the tall man in shock. 

“Oh,” Gyomei says. “My apologies for interrupting.” He turns to the man. “I am Himejima Gyomei.” 

Your neighbour introduces himself and you try not to be annoyed at how he’s stepping back now that someone else is here. Especially when it’s another man. “Are you friends?” your neighbour asks. 

Gyomei looks down at you. “I am very lucky to have her in my life.” It’s not an answer and you have a feeling he’s done it intentionally. Whatever. You’re not going to complain if it gets you out of this. 

You smile up at him. “I think I’m the lucky one,” you say. You mean it too. Gyomei is a calming presence in your life, someone steadfast that you know you can rely on. He rests his hand on your shoulder and you relax under it. You’re safe with him. 

He turns back to your neighbour. “Please, continue your conversation. I can wait.” 

“No,” your neighbour says. “It’s fine. I didn’t realize…” he trails off before wandering away without saying goodbye. 

“Are you alright?” Gyomei asks again. 

“Yeah,” you say. “I am now.” 

Obanai and Mitsuri (because ofc they're together)

You notice when his gaze shifts from you to something behind you. Then you hear it.

“You’re outside! Did you know we were coming?” 

You turn to see Mitsuri heading towards you, Obanai behind her, his eyes already on your neighbour who is staring…at Mitsuri. You turn and move, just enough to block his view. Mitsuri doesn’t have a problem showing off any of her assets, but that doesn’t mean your creep of a neighbour could stare. Ew. 

Misturi crashes into you with a hug, as though it’s been years since you’ve last seen each other and not days. You hug back just as tight, grateful for the company. 

“What are you doing here?” you ask. 

“We came to take you out!” Misturi pulls back and motions towards Obanai. “We missed you!” 

You weren’t sure if that was the truth but a quick glance at Obanai shows that he’s moved to stand between you two and your neighbour. He nods toward you and you can’t help but smile back. 

“Where are we going?” you ask. 

“Dinner,” Obanai says. 

“Excuse me!” your neighbour cuts in, moving to the side so that Obanai is no longer blocking him. "Hey, we were talking.”

“Oh!” Mitsuri turns to face him. “I’m sorry!” 

Obanai glares at the interruption. “Who are you?”

“Her neighbour. We were just getting introduced.” He gives his name again, this time reaching for Mitsuri’s hand. He does not get far. 

“You often touch people without them wanting you to?” Obanai asks, his grip tightening on the man’s wrist. Your neighbour tries to pull back but is unable to. 

“He was just introducing himself,” Mitsuri says. “Weren’t you?”

“Of course!” Your neighbour says. “Can’t people be friendly?”

“No.” 

You have to hide a smile as Mitsuri giggles at Obanai’s response. 

“Go ahead,” Obanai says. “I’d like a word with your neighbour.” He doesn’t look at you, keeping his eyes on the man whose wrist he’s still holding. 

“Okay!” Mitsuri grabs your hand and starts pulling you away. “Nice to meet you! Don’t be too rough, Obanai, okay?” Once they’re far enough away, Misturi lets go and looks at you. “Are you alright? You looked uncomfortable.”

“Yeah,” you say, smiling softly. “He came out of nowhere. I’m glad you were there.” 

“Don’t worry, Obanai will let him know you’re not interested. Besides, you have us!” 

You hug Mitsuri again with one arm. “I do!” 

Muichiro

You step back as your neighbour moves forward, reaching for your hand again. Why does he keep trying to touch you?

“I don’t think she likes that,” a voice comes from the side. Both of you look and your face lights up when you see who it is. 

“Muichiro! What are you doing here?”

His head tilts slightly as he looks at you. “You said I could come any time.” 

You smile slightly as you nod. “You’re right, I did.” The kid was always welcome but it was rare to see him without his twin. “Where’s Yuichiro?” 

“He said he’d come later. He thinks he’s figured out a move that will beat me in shogi.” 

“Is this your brother?” your neighbour cuts in. He smiles at the younger boy and introduces himself. Muichiro ignores him. 

“Are you going out?” he asks. “Can we join you?”

“Yes,” your neighbour adds. “We can walk with you. Get to know each other better.” You recoil from him reaching for you again and step back.

“Not you,” Muichiro cuts in. “You are not invited.” 

“What?” 

“You’re not invited,” the kid says again. “I don’t think you should touch her anymore. She doesn’t like it.” 

“Listen, brat, no one asked you.” 

“Hey!” you cut in, scowling. Why was it always easier to defend someone else than it was to defend yourself? “He’s right. You can’t just invite yourself. Thank you, but I’m not interested.” 

He reaches for you again but Muichiro knocks him over as the boy moves forward. “She said she’s not interested.” Muichiro stares at the man on the ground for a moment. “You shouldn’t bother women who aren’t interested.” He looks back at you. “Should we call someone?”

“It’s fine,” you say. “Come on, let’s go meet Yuichiro on the way. I’ll buy dinner.” You both leave the man to pick himself up and you silently pray he gets the hint. 

Giyu

You almost don't hear your name being called. The lack of reaction doesn’t stop Giyu from moving forward and standing next to you. 

You look up at him in relief. “Giyu!”

“I called,” he says. He glances at your neighbour who is watching you. “Are you busy?” 

“No,” you shake your head, hoping that he’ll be able to at least get you out of this. Even as hopeless as he was socially, you know that he’ll pick up on your hints. You’ve known each other long enough. 

“We’re in the middle of a conversation,” your neighbour says, looking unimpressed that you’re dismissing him. 

Giyu looks at him before turning back to you. “Are you hungry? I wanted to talk.” 

“Sure!” 

“Excuse me,” your neighbour interrupts again. 

Giyu gives you an unimpressed look but turns to face him. “Can I help you?”

“You’re interrupting. I was just getting to know your friend.”

Giyu stares at the man for a moment. “I don’t think she wants to know you.”

Your neighbour’s jaw drops. “Who are you to say that?”

“Her friend.” Giyu looks at you again. “Do you want to stay?”

You shake your head slightly, just enough to convey your desire to leave. You might have to never come back. Or maybe you could convince him to move. “Let’s get something to eat.”

“There’s no need to be rude!” your neighbour snaps.

“She’s not rude,” Giyu says. “It was clear she wasn’t interested before. You should pay attention.” You try not to laugh at Giyu of all people pointing out ignoring social cues. You adore him more for it. “Let’s go.” 

“Hey!” your neighbour reaches out, aiming for Giyu’s shoulder to stop him from leading you away. He doesn’t make it. Giyu steps to the side, turning as he grabs your neighbour’s hand and directs the motion straight to the ground. 

You can’t stop the gasp at the sound of him hitting the ground. 

Giyu holds him there for a moment. “Are you done?” he asks. He finally releases him and steps back. “You should keep your hands to yourself.” Giyu looks at you again. “Can we go now?”

“Yeah,” you smile. “We can.” 

He offers you his hand to step over your neighbour and leads you away. “If he bothers you again, call us.”

“I will.” 

Kyojuro

Someone shouts your name and as soon as you hear it, you calm down. Things are going to be okay. You turn towards the voice and grin. “Kyo!” 

“I hoped you were home!” He strides forwards towards the two of you. He looks between you both. “Am I interrupting?”

“No!” you exclaim as your neighbour says “yes.” 

Kyojuro looks at you both before he nods. “I see. My apologies regardless.” He smiles at your neighbour and offers his hand. “I am Rengoku Kyojuro. Who are you?” 

You watch as your neighbour introduces himself almost warily as if he’s not sure what to make of the situation. 

Kyojuro turns to you, stepping closer and smiling down. “Are you free today?”

“Yes.”

“Excellent. Continue your conversation, I will wait.” He crosses his arms over his chest and turns to face your neighbour. The man looks stunned to be pinned by Kyojuro’s gaze. You know the feeling but you wait to see if he’s going to continue to confess under your friend’s stare. 

“I uh…” your neighbour glances at Kyojuro again before he looks at you. “As I was saying, I want to know you more! If you don’t like that I drink, I’ll stop.”

You look at Kyojuro whose expression hasn’t changed but you can see the tension in his form. You wouldn’t notice if you didn’t know him like you do. “I heard you,” you say carefully. It’s safer now, you feel, to decline his interest outright with someone else with you. “Thank you, but I’m not interested.”

“You haven’t even given me a chance,” your neighbour says. You don’t want to. “We could just spend time together.”

“No thanks,” you say, shifting closer to Kyojuro without thinking. 

Your neighbour steps forward, reaching for your hand again. “I’m not trying–” 

“She has made herself clear,” Kyojuro interrupts, his hand on the man’s wrist, preventing him from touching you. “Do not dishonour yourself further and press for her attention.” 

“Dishonour? I’m just trying to ask her out!”

“And she refused,” Kyojuro says, still staring at the man. “I fear that if she should accept, the flame of her heart would be drowned by the weight of your desire. I cannot accept that!” 

“I didn’t ask you,” your neighbour snarls. 

“You did not! But I am here regardless and thankful for it, if only to protect her from your refusal to hear her disinterest. Leave now.”

“You can’t just–”

“I can! I trust that you will not embarrass yourself further. Should I hear that you continue to push or attempt to take advantage, I will not be as forgiving as I am now.” 

The man stares at him for a moment before Kyojuro finally lets go. Your neighbour stumbles back slightly. He glares at you both, rubbing at the wrist Kyojuro held before he walks off, heading to the building. Kyojuro watches until the man disappears into the building before he turns to you. “Are you alright?” 

You move without really thinking, wrapping your arms around his waist and hugging him tightly. “Thank you.” 

He pauses for a moment before he brings his arms around you, holding you against him. “It’s alright,” he says softly. “I am just glad I was able to be here.” 

You pull back. “I appreciate the help. What brings you around?”

“I wanted to see you, of course!” He lets go as you move away. “As you are not busy, would you be willing to join me? I have something I wanted to show you!”

“Of course! Let’s go!”

Tengen

An arm drapes itself over your shoulder. If you weren’t familiar with the weight of it, the scent of the man who pulls you into him, you would have recoiled. “What’s this then?”

You look up at the built man who towers over the rest of you. “Tengen! What are you doing here?” 

“Came to see you, of course! Who’s this?” Despite the cheerful tone, he doesn’t take his eyes off your neighbour. 

“My neighbour,” you say after a moment as you realize the man in question is still looking at Tengen. 

“Hm,” Tengen leans down, putting his face next to yours and ignoring your neighbour. “You miss me?” He grins as he asks, eyes on you. 

“Didn’t I just see you the other day with the others?” you quip back, used to his flirting.

“Who are you?” the man finally speaks up.

Tengen glances over at him and you can practically see him considering if he wants to deal with the man. He straightens, keeping his arm around you, and grins. “Uzui Tengen! Flashiest man around and the love of her life!”

“You’re not the love of my life,” you say automatically.

“I could be,” Tengen says. He leans down closer again and his voice lowers. “Don’t you want to give us a chance?” 

“We’re talking,” your neighbour cuts in again. “In fact, if she’s not interested, it’s all the more reason she should say yes to going out with me.” 

“I would think that the she in question should make the choice,” you mutter. 

“Why would she date someone as unflashy as you?” Tengen asks, looking unimpressed. 

Your neighbour seems taken aback by the question. “What? Why wouldn’t she?” 

Tengen makes a point of looking the man up and down. “You have no flair! No flamboyance! In fact, it’s very unflashy of you to keep ignoring her like this while you talk about her, right Angel?” 

“Hmm,” you nod in agreement. 

Tengen tightens his grip slightly “Do you want to go out with this boring man?” He asks. 

“No.”

“There you have it. Now,” Tengen leans towards your neighbour. “In fact, I don’t think you should bother her again and if you do, well…I’ll show you how flashy I can be.” 

The man swallows slightly, as though he’s suddenly reminded of Tengen’s size. “Uh sure,” your neighbour says. He glances at you. “Sorry.”

You don’t get a chance to respond because Tengen leads you away, arm still around you and heads towards your building. 

“You’re not going out anywhere, are you? Thought we could order in. Unless you want to go out. Karaoke?” 

“Are we going to invite the girls?”

He grins at you. “Of course!”

Bonus!

Tengen & his wives!

You hear the squeal first and then Suma crashes into you. You hug the woman back, used to how affectionate she is. 

“What are you doing here?” you ask,  completely distracted from the situation with your neighbour as you look to see Makio and Hinatsuru heading towards you.

“We missed you!” Suma says, pulling back. 

“Will you let her go?” Makio demands, yanking Suma back as they get close. “You’re interrupting!” 

“Sorry!” Suma lets go. “I was just excited!”

“It has been a while since we’ve seen you,” Hina agrees. She looks over at your neighbour before turning back to you. “Sorry for interrupting. We hope you don’t mind that we dropped by unannounced.” 

“Not at all,” you smile at the three women that now surround you. Makio has shifted, taking point to be in between you all and your neighbour. “I’m glad you’re here.”

“I bet,” Makio says. There’s a brief moment where you all communicate silently with each other. The slight widening of the eyes, the nod and shifting of the shoulders. The way friends have communicated about the people around them for ages without words. It’s enough that the three women are all aware that you’re uncomfortable and are grateful for their help. 

“Excuse me.”

They all turn to look at your neighbour who looks delighted at the sudden prospect of more women to interact with. It probably helps that all three of the new ones are gorgeous, well-endowed and wearing low-cut tops. 

“What?” Makio asks, unimpressed. Suma shifts slightly to stand closer to you. 

“Sorry to interrupt,” he says before introducing himself. The women all stare at the hand he offers but none of them reach to take it. He pauses before finally dropping it, but he steps closer. “We were just getting to know each other,” he says. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to your friends?” 

No, you think. You don’t get a chance to answer though because Makio turns her back on the man and faces you again. “Have you eaten?” Makio asks. 

“Oh yeah!” Suma grabs your arm and you feel a rush of affection for these women who have shown up and are trying to help. “If you have, we could get dessert!” 

“You’re not busy, are you?” Hina asks.

“No,” you shake your head. 

“Hey!” your neighbour cuts in again. “There’s no reason to be a bitch. You could have just said you were into girls. I wouldn’t have minded…especially if I can watch.”

Your jaw drops open and you can see the way the others nearly shake with anger. Before any of them can step forward, your attention is drawn behind him as Tengen appears.

“Oh ho! What’s this?” His hand slaps down on your neighbour's shoulder. You can see his grip tighten. “I didn’t just hear you call them something so unflashy, did I?” 

“Tengen!” You all call out, your voice tinged with a little more relief. As glad as you are for the company of the girls, you don’t want to subject them to your neighbour more than you have to. 

Tengen grins at the four of you before focusing back on the man he’s holding. “Now, what were you saying?” 

“What? Nothing!” 

“Liar!” Makio snaps. 

“He called her a bitch, Tengen,” Hina says softly. She loops her arm around yours on the side that doesn’t have Suma. 

“He said he wanted to watch!” Suma adds. 

“Oh really?” Tengen’s eyes narrow. “Perhaps you girls should go ahead and I’ll catch up…after I teach this one some manners.” 

“Good,” Makio nods.

“We’ll let you know where we decide to go,” Hina says softly. “Come on.” The girls usher you away from the building where Tengen is still keeping your neighbour in place. The man looks slightly terrified now but Tengen waves you all off with a grin. 

“I’m so glad you’re okay!” Suma exclaims, still keeping her arm around yours as they walk. 

“Yeah,” Makio agrees. “How long has that creep been bothering you?”

“He’s been staring for a while but just came out of nowhere today, telling me he liked me and wanted to go out. He said he’s an alcoholic but would stop for me.” You see the look the women give each other. 

“Maybe you should stay with us,” Hina suggests. “Just for a bit.”

“Yeah!” 

You laugh slightly. “I don’t know. I’ll have to go home eventually, right? I’m sure he got the point.” 

An arm wraps around your shoulder as Tengen appears, inserting himself between you and Suma. He laughs as you both adjust to the new position. “He sure did!” He towers over all of you but Tengen has never felt threatening. At least not to you. “He won’t be bothering you anymore. And if he’s still staring, call us. We’ll deal with him,” he promises. 

You smile up at him. “Thank you.” 

“You don’t have to thank us,” Hinatsuru says softly. “We’re happy to help.”

“Yeah!” Makio adds. “He’s lucky Tengen showed up before I got to him.”

“I don’t know about that…” Tengen says, “but I know I am with such flashy girls!”

AND

Tanjiro, Nezuko, Zenitsu and Inosuke

The man is holding your hand in a light grip that tightens as you try to pull away. You’re trying not to be rude but his hand is clammy and you never wanted to be touched. You have a feeling you’re going to have to snap and then deal with the repercussions later. 

Your attention shifts to the sound of feet hitting the pavement and a familiar voice calling your name. You yank your hand from your neighbour before turning and moving back, managing to avoid Inosuke’s attempt at a tackle. You shift and watch as Zenitsu falls, his attempts to hug you failing. You’re used to these kids and at this point, it’s a game when you meet. 

Zenitsu whines at your avoidance. 

“Haha!” Inosuke slides to a stop and turns back to you. “You won’t avoid me again!” 

“Stop tackling her!” 

You ignore Zenitsu and Inosuke as they start arguing and turn to Tanjiro and Nezuko as they stop next to you. “What are you all doing here?” 

“I hope you don’t mind,” Tanjiro says softly. “We were passing by and saw you. We thought we’d stop and say hi. I tried to get them to stop from running at you. Sorry.” 

“It’s fine,” you wave him off. “I’m glad to see you.” Nezuko moves forward and offers a hug and you hug back, noticing the way Tanjiro moves between you and your neighbour. Your gaze softens. He’s such a good kid. They all are. 

“It’s been awhile,” Tanjiro agrees. 

“Excuse me,” your neighbour cuts in, moving around Tanjiro. “Didn’t realize you were so popular with children. Are you related?” 

“No,” you say, not willing to give more than that. 

“Who are you?” Inosuke shoves himself between you and your neighbour. You can see the man trying to move around the kid, but Inosuke has a way of making himself known. “Fight me!” he demands. 

“What? I’m not going to fight a kid.” Your neighbour looks for you but you let go of Nezuko who raises her eyebrows, silently asking if you’re okay. 

You nod back, smiling at the girl. 

“You think you’ll beat me?” Inosuke says. “You couldn’t touch me. I’m the greatest!” 

“Who is that?” Zenitsu asks quietly, coming up to your side now that Inosuke is distracted. “Do you know him?”

“He’s my neighbour,” you say. “He was just…introducing himself.” You wince as you say it. 

“You didn’t seem comfortable. Do you want to leave?” Tanjiro asks, focused on you as Inosuke drags your neighbour to more open space in his demands to fight. “We can walk you to where you’re going. Or inside,” he offers. 

“Thanks.” You smile in relief, even if they’re just kids, you’re grateful you’re no longer alone. 

“Fuck off!” All of your attention turns to the sound of your neighbour yelling at Inosuke. “You freak!” 

“Excuse me?” You move around the children, striding towards your neighbour. To hell with being polite. “What did you just say?” He turns to you, surprise crossing his features as though he’s forgotten you were there. 

“I–I was just–”

“Just what?” You snap. “He’s a kid and you’re swearing at him?”

“He’s not leaving me alone! I’m trying to talk to you!”

“I don’t want to talk!” You stride forward, aware of the eyes on you. “I haven’t shown the slightest interest and you kept pushing and trying to touch me!” His eyes widen but you don’t stop. “They’re fifteen! And they have more sense and observation than you do. You don’t treat people like that, even if they’re annoying and you don’t keep pushing your attention on to someone who doesn’t want it!” 

“I’m sorry,” he reaches for you again.

“Fuck off!” you use his own words against him. “Come on, Inosuke, don’t waste your time fighting him. You’d likely win in seconds. Let’s go.” You turn and walk back toward the others. 

“You’re so cool!” Zenitsu cheers as you return.

“That was impressive,” Tanjiro agrees. “Hopefully he’ll listen.”

“If he doesn’t, I’ll come back and show him how weak he is!” 

You smile at Inosuke and reach out to ruffle his hair. He ducks out of the way. “Thanks. Come on, let’s get out of here. You guys want to walk me to my friends?”

“Yeah!” 

“Let’s go!”

“I’m going to get there first!” 

“What!? Wait for us!”

taglist: @raith-way @chrissymunson @veetlegeuse  @chickensarentcheap @residentdormouse 

[plutonianeris]

𝖒𝖊𝖉𝖚𝖘𝖆 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖏𝖚𝖈𝖙 𝖆𝖘𝖈

This is how medusa conjuct ascendant has manifested for me. I am not a professional astrologer, just sharing my personal experiences I believe correlate with this placement.

🐍 In regards to appearances, I have always had very long, dark wavy hair. Growing up, a lot of times my hair was touched without my consent and I remember distinctly someone pulling my hair hard as fuck in school and it was a group of girls (didnt know which one it was). I also remember boys trying to “flirt” with me by tugging my hair.

🐍As I got older and started taking care of my hair even more, that is one the first things I always get compliments on by strangers, acquaintances or coworkers.

🐍In some other posts I see people mention a “piercing gaze.” As a kid, when I was angry I use to look at people like I wanted to shoot lasers out of my eyes. My mother would hate when I would look at her like that, she told me I looked like a monster when I gave her the death stare during arguments.

🐍On the flip side of that however, I do also get compliments on my eyes. My eyes are big and very dark as well just like my hair. One time in high school, one of my teachers told me I had “bedroom eyes” in front of the whole class. I realized it was kinda inappropriate when I googled what that was after. One of my friends said I have “siren eyes.”

🐍I have never felt fully comfortable around the opposite sex. I was always very very wary of men. In high school was when it was at its peak. The guys were pretty gross. One time a guy in my grade (who I barely knew) pulled me into a hug and literally bit my fucking shoulder. I had shoved him away and looked towards my teacher but he didnt do anything, just looked away.

🐍I can definitely see men in my life or in my surroundings who were not being inappropriate to me being indifferent to watching bad/ uncomfortable things happen to me. Either they didn’t care or didn’t find me someone worthy as defending or both.

🐍When I did defend myself I was villanized quickly over it. In high school, a guy behind me slapped my butt and when I turned around and slapped him in the face I got in trouble/ detention for it.

🐍I was often talked about in a very sexual manner (despite never dating or being “promiscuous” for a lack of better word). Comments were made about my body and sexuality.

🐍Then when I went to college I felt like I putting myself out there more but realized I wasn’t fully being vulnerable. I liked to flirt with guys but I wanted them to have to practically BEG for my attention. And then when they gave it to me I would shut them down. I use to do that a lot. One time a guy was so angry at me he called me a snake. I’m an adult now, and have grown and don’t do any kind of thing like that anymore. But at the time, I believe I was seeking a kind of power/control over other people because I personally felt powerless or unworthy.

🐍I am also not personally fond of snakes as pets or wanting to hold them. But I use to always want a medusa tattoo in college and had a bracelet with Medusa and another with Artemis on it that I wore everyday (and it was all before I even knew about astrology or the fact that I have this placement).

🐍I have generally had good relationships with women. But I do think for sure growing up I tried to make the women around me (whether family, teachers or friends) like me as much as possible. It felt devastating being rejected by them.

🐍When the women in my life would hurt me, whether by accident or on purpose I would make excuses for them until it would blow up in my face. (It reminds me of how Medusa use to worship Athena and was shocked and destroyed at the betrayal).

🐍There have been times where other women would look at me as if I was in competition with them (when in reality I didn’t give a fuck). But they would make petty comparisons. One time I had a “friend” who asked in front of a group of guys, “who is prettier? me or her?”

🐍I use to HATE when people stared at me, mostly when it was men. I would look back at people and be like what the fuck are you looking at? or say something along those lines. It made me so furious when men would catcall me too or eye me up and down.

🐍I would definitely say that growing up I had a bad temper. I was very resentful and impulsive and I was angry with the things that had happened to me and my body. Sometimes I just wanted to disappear. I was not easily given the benefit of the doubt. I was quick to get blamed. Not easily listened to.

🐍Overall, I can see having this placement as being very heavy as kid or a teen. I was so young and I was just worried about being a kid and getting to know myself but I got sexualized so much. I think I did grow up too fast in certain aspects. I do not miss my childhood nor do I remember it with nostalgia.

🐍I love being an adult. I love making my own choices. I love not having to ask for permission. I love feeling confident in my femininity(I feel like this year is when I just started to fully explore it out of love). It was a painful journey but more often than not I feel brave, and safe and comfortable in my body now more than ever. I don’t self sabotage anymore or go out of my way to shut people out. But it took a very long time.

[maewrit3s]

-Apologize

Word count: 2.15k~

Pairing: Xiao x fem reader

Description: While you’re stuck spending time with Xiao in his room while your parents visit downstairs you accidentally make him lose a game and he takes out his frustrations on you

Trigger warnings: non-con, non-con filming, non-con listening, degradation, victim blaming?

Edited by: @pretty-princess-peach

You were sitting cross legged on Xiao’s bed, watching him as he focused on the video game he was playing. He hadn’t said a word to you since he had told you that you could sit on his bed while you waited for him to finish. However, that didn’t mean that he was being quiet. He was on a discord call with his friends while they all played against each other in teams. He was shouting and laughing and making jokes, half of which you didn’t even understand (What the hell did “bottom fragging” even mean, and what was so bad about girls playing games?), and you were getting bored waiting for him to stop gaming and finally pay attention to you.

You had only come over to his house to visit since your parents had been friends with his parents since your family had moved here when you were in elementary school, and even now that you were an adult, since you lived at home, you were expected to accompany them on visits. As always, you were sent to go spend time with Xiao in his room, and as always, he was ignoring you. You had always found Xiao to be a bit of a weird guy. However, he seemed relatively harmless. He always seemed annoyed or discontent with something and seemed to either be scared of women or at least uncomfortable around them. You had never considered him a friend, but you didn’t hate him or anything. However, you did hate it when he refused to spare you so much as a glance and just ignored you while he played his games and talked to his friends. Although, you supposed that it wasn’t so boring to watch him play. He was quite pretty, after all…even if he did look like he probably needed a shower.

You tried to focus on the quiet voices coming from his headphones, curious about what they were talking about, but you still couldn’t follow the conversation. Eventually, you gave up on trying to glean any entertainment from the current situation, and you decided to try and get him to give you some attention.

“Xiao?”

There was no response.

“Xiao! Hellooooo?”

Xiao flinched a little when you spoke louder and swore.

“That’s not my mom, idiot. That’s just the daughter of some people my parents are friends with.”

You rolled your eyes and stood up, taking a few steps so you were close enough to Xiao that you could tap his shoulder. He turned away from his game for a second just to glare at you, and unfortunately enough, in those few seconds, Xiao had managed to get shot and killed in the game he was playing. He noticed immediately, turning back to the game and hitting buttons while he swore. You could hear what sounded like laughter coming from his headset, and it seemed to drive Xiao absolutely crazy. He stood up and gave you a death stare, and you immediately felt tiny compared to him, despite Xiao only being a few inches taller than you.

“This was your fucking fault!”

He wasn’t quite yelling, but he was loud enough to make you jump.

“Apologize for fucking distracting me!”

You sighed, but it was clear that he was being serious, so you figured that it was best to just apologize to him.

“Okay, I’m sorry.”

He took a deep breath and went to sit back down.

“But you should really calm down. It's literally just a game.”

That was it. He snapped. He tore his headphones off of his head and tossed them onto his chair. He backed you against the wall and wrapped a hand tightly around your throat.

“What the fuck did you just say?”

You were terrified. Xiao had never seemed truly scary before this moment. Even when you had heard him yelling at his teammates during a game or yelling because he was upset about losing, he had never seemed scary.

Xiao’s grip around your throat tightened, and your hands shot up to pull at his, trying to get him to stop.

“Answer me!”

You were shaking at this point, and you had tears in your eyes. You considered calling for help but quickly remembered that his room had been soundproofed years ago due to his constant shouting. You figured it was better to just answer Xiao than to start fruitlessly screaming.

“I said it’s just a game and that you should calm down! Now please stop! I can barely breathe!”

Xiao’s grip tightened once again. Now you really couldn’t breathe.

“It’s not just a fucking game you dumb bitch. It was fucking ranked, and you made me fucking lose!”

You tried to choke out an apology, but you could no longer form words, and black spots were starting to appear in your vision.

Xiao was seething. He was beyond pissed that you had made him lose, and he needed to make you pay for it. You’re just a dumb fucking girl. You shouldn’t be walking around pretending like you have any right to talk to him! Xiao knew exactly how to make you pay. He was going to fuck you, and he was going to cover you in his cum. You were a girl, after all. It's what you were meant for.

Seconds before you blacked out, Xiao finally let go of your throat. You yelped as he grabbed your hair and dragged you over to his bed. He pushed you down and climbed on top of you.

“Xiao, what the fuck are you doing?! Get off of me!”

He ignored your words and the way you were trying to get away from him and instead focused on pulling off your shirt. You did your best to hold your shirt down so that he couldn’t get it off of you, but he grabbed a hold of your wrists and held them over your head as he pulled your shirt off of you. The second that he got it off of you, you started to cry.

“Shut the fuck up. Don’t act like you don’t want this; I know you do.”

You just shook your head and kept crying. Xiao started pulling down your pants, and you tried to fight him the best that you could, but he was far stronger than you, and any resistance felt pointless(not that that stopped you from struggling).

“Look at what you’re fucking wearing. Who the fuck wears clothes like that with underwear like this underneath if they’re not begging to be fucked?”

You started crying even harder. You hadn’t been dressed in any particularly scandalous way. You had been wearing a crop top and some ripped jeans, but you didn’t think that was a particularly revealing outfit, and he didn’t get to tell you that wearing your pretty lacy underwear was you “begging to be fucked”! It wasn’t your fault that dressing pretty made you feel nice!

Xiao flipped you onto your stomach and held your wrists behind you in one hand while the other undid your bra. He pulled it off of you and used the straps to tie your wrists together behind your back before flipping you back over.

“Stop it! You can’t do this!”

Xiao snorted. Your makeup was running down your face, and your body was shaking with your sobs. He had to be sick to be enjoying this.

He started pulling down your panties, and that was enough for you to start screaming at him. However, unfortunately for you, Xiao didn’t enjoy your screaming, and after he had gotten your panties off of you, he shoved them in your mouth. When he saw you start to try and spit them out, he decided to give you a warning.

“If you spit those out or start screaming again, I will make you fucking regret it.”

You froze in fear, tears still running down your face as you watched Xiao pull off his shirt and hoodie and take off his underwear and pants. You couldn’t help but stare. After all, he was built so incredibly well that you couldn’t help but run your eyes over his chiseled torso and his surprisingly big arms. The second your eyes reached his cock however, you snapped back to reality and your current situation.

You started wriggling around, trying to free your wrists, but before you had any success, Xiao was spreading your legs and lining his cock up with your hole. You started sobbing again, and Xiao laughed at how pathetic you looked underneath him. He was feeling better already. He started pushing inside of you, and you started trying to voice your protests through the cloth in your mouth. He forced his way in until he was balls deep, and god, it fucking hurt. You certainly weren’t wet enough, and he was too big for it not to hurt. He didn’t give you any time to adjust and started fucking you immediately. He was moaning and breathing heavily above you, and you wished you could just crawl away.

After a few minutes, he reached up and pulled your panties out of your mouth. You started begging him to stop, apologizing over and over, but he didn’t stop.

“Fuck cumming on you, I’m going to fucking fill you up.”

You immediately started panicking.

“Please, no! You can’t! I’m not on the pill, please!”

He laughed at your distress.

“Well, if you don’t want me to fucking breed you, then- fuck, then you’re going to have to tell me how you fucking love my cock and that this is what- ngh, you were fucking made for.”

You really didn’t have a choice. You couldn’t risk getting pregnant, and saying a few words wasn’t going to kill you.

“I-”

“Wait wait wait.”

He stopped fucking you for a second and reached beside him, grabbing his phone before turning it on and pointing it towards you.

“Now say it.”

He was going to record you? Fuck. He started fucking you again but not quite as hard and fast as before as he kept his phone pointed at you.

“I love your cock so much. This is what I was made for! I'm sorry, please!”

He laughed again at your desperation and tossed his phone beside him before starting to fuck you even harder.

After a few more minutes, Xiao was getting close to cumming, and as ashamed of it as you were, so were you. It really wasn’t your fault. He was hitting all the right spots, and your body was responding accordingly! After a few more thrusts, you were arching your back and moaning as you came around his cock.

“See? I fucking knew you liked this, so stop acting like you don’t. Fucking whore.”

Unfortunately for you, Xiao wasn’t done yet and was overstimulating the hell out of you. You begged him to stop, and he ignored you. He kept fucking you until he was finally finishing inside of you, much to your horror.

“You…you came inside…”

“Did you really believe that I wouldn’t? You should be grateful. You barely deserve my cum.”

Xiao pulled out of you and wiped off his cock on your thigh. He got dressed again and went and sat back in his chair, putting on his headset. He immediately started talking about what he’d just done to you, and you realized that all of his friends that he had been taking to had heard him rape you. Xiao spun around in his chair and grabbed his phone from the bed. He was sending the video that he had taken of you to his friends.

“Please, Xiao, don’t show that video to anyone, please!”

He rolled his eyes at you.

“I’ll show it to whoever I want, and if you don’t want me showing it to anyone that you know, then you won’t mention this to anyone.”

You met his gaze and could tell that he was being serious.

“…Okay.”

He turned away from you again and kept talking to his friends. How fucked up did they have to be if they were fine with hearing about how he raped you? You laid on his bed and tried to stop thinking. Maybe in a few minutes, he would let you go, and you could walk back to your house and never have to see him again.

Though, of course, things couldn’t go your way, and after about 10 minutes of him talking to his friends and you trying to space out, he was getting up and walking back over to you.

“What are you doing?”

You tried to wiggle away from him as he got back on top of you.

“I’m going to fuck you again. Isn’t that obvious?”

You started crying again. This was going to be a long evening.

Join the tag list

©maewrit3s

[proshippers-against-censorship]

P-A-C DISCORD:

----------

Just a little bit of housekeeping. Bear with me.

You may call me Jackal. I'm an adult and literally do not give a hoot about what pronouns you use for me. I do not claim to be a good person. If I was a good person, this account would not exist. I am a civil and polite person, though, and I expect you all to be the same. I am a mechatronics major and previously a psychology major. The majority of the information I share here comes from some of the greatest minds to exist on this planet. Perhaps consider heeding it, especially if you have no formal education on the topic.

I do not write nor read most lolicon, incest, or bestiality content. I do not support pedophilia, incest, rape, or bestiality in real life. I do read lolicon of adult women with more youthful bodies, because that content helps me grow confidence in my own body, as I'm constantly mistaken to be a child despite being above the age of 18. I do hope all child-touchers, animal-fuckers, rapists, racists, and anybody else who harms a living thing out of ill get the psychological help that they desperately need. To reiterate, this account is strictly ANTI-CONTACT. You can't control paraphilias but you can control the harm they cause.

I do support the protection of all things fictional, because if we make the things a few people find morally wrong to be illegal, we've then already lost when the folks on top go after fiction supporting LGBT, non-christian religions, etc.

I also support the protection of vent pieces, even if that vent centers around things like pedophilia, rape, etc. I am proud of you for taking yet another step towards healing from abuse you suffered in the past and/or from the harmful paraphilias that you struggle with currently.

This account is built on the notion that any interaction will be productive and good-natured regardless of the involved parties. You are free to give your stance on why proship is bad...so long as you accept the fact that people are then welcome to debate back on why proship isn't bad. Any debates that turn hairy will be ended, however, healthy debate and challenging your beliefs is a wonderful way to continuously educate yourself.

Despite my account, I do not intend on forcing a belief on you. In fact, I greatly support that you look at both anti-proship and proship content, and make the effort to educate yourself as well as possible and determine what belief you truly belong to. There is no good in trapping yourself in an echo chamber.

You are free to submit any points as asks or submissions. So long as they are productive and good-natured, I will post them, regardless of what side they take. If they are not productive or good-natured, they will either be deleted, or I will post them to both clown on you for being an asshole and educate you the best I can on why anti-proship is a rather harmful belief system.

Feel free to draw my attention to any posts I haven't reblogged yet that would fit in to this blog. I'll look them over and reblog them.

Most posts will be reblogs, asks, and submissions. However, I may occasionally post my own thoughts. These will often be tagged with #jackal barks, but sometimes I will forget. Any hate comments will be simply tagged as #hatemail.

I have an alternate account called @proshitters-against-constipation . I use that blog to reblog content from antis and shower it in compliments. Look, it's funny watching them sob because a 'nasty, nasty person' gave them a genuine, heartfelt compliment.

Please just block this blog if uncomfortable with the content. It's very glitchy on my phone, so most of the time, tags are incredibly minimal. I will not hold anything against you for blocking the blog. The whole point is that you are the one responsible for curating your online existence. If you dislike incest ships, block em. Dislike noncon content, block it. Dislike the contents of this blog, block me. You control what you see, just as others control what they see. Curate your feed, don't curate others.

Thank you all for reading this, and remember, if you let them destroy the fiction you find morally despicable, then when they come for what you enjoy and support, you've already lost.

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Ask/submission tagging system!

#pro stance - proshipper asks

#anti stance - antishipper asks

#no stance - asks of indeterminate standing

#birthday wishes - B O R T H

#hate mail - death threats and the like

#jackal barks - I'm Talkin Here!

#jackal pets - my fur babies!

#jackal rpf - rpf of me

#jackal ships - ships of me

#tot 2024 - askbox trick or treat for Oct 2024

#pac fanart - art of The Creature

----------

If you actually scrolled down this far, have a fun, exciting, and inconclusive list of beings I would be down to smash:

•Stain (MHA)

•Overhaul (MHA)

•EVA-01 (NGE)

•EVA-02 (NGE)

•Xue Yang (MDZS)

•Kurloz Makara (Homestuck)

•Mothman

•Bigfoot

•u1146 (Cells At Work)

•The S.Q.U.i.P. (Be More Chill)

•Moder (The Ritual)

•Michael Myers (Halloween, especially RZ's version)

•Demon Drop (Intamin Freefall, 1st gen)

[saltygilmores]

Does Jess Mariano have ADHD or not? One neurodivergent's meager opinion, don't take anything I say too seriously.

I have seen some people (infrequently) try to armchair-diagnose Jess with ADHD. I was diagnosed around 7 years old in the early 90s with ADD, when ADD and ADHD were two separate diagnoses. I'm old? I realized, as an adult, that it was and still very much is common for women to go under-diagnosed well into adulthood, so for my school district to pick that out when I was in first grade shows they did at least one thing right, I guess? Or my ADD was so severe and blindingly obvious that it wasn't exactly difficult to notice. But I digress. What is my diagnosis? Take everything I say with a grain of salt. I'm only playing armchair therapist, as we like to do around these parts. I have no medical or mental health training and I can only speak from my own experience as someone with the condition. As we know, it's a spectrum, and it often presents differently for boys than it does for girls. With that out of the way, no, I don't think he has ADHD. A lot of people lean on the scene in Teach Me Tonight where he's not interested in Rory's tutoring. Or maybe that scene where he's bugging Lane for a pencil in class. (PLEASE, I needed to see more interaction at SHH!) So that's the Attention Deficit, but those two scenes really aren't enough to convince me. Some of other symptoms of ADHD (and certainly not all of them) and whether I think they may apply to him: Talking Excessively- No Fidgeting & Squirming-No Interrupting-No Restlessness-No Problems with Following Through On Set Tasks-No Mood swings- no impulsiveness- no Frequently loses items-no Disorganized- Maybe? (if we're going by his sometimes messy living quarters, but he also keeps a nicely organized dresser that Luke can snoop through) Forgetfulness-no Trouble Listening: Ehh? I don't think so. He just doesn't like listening to people who are transparent as a piece of plastic wrap with their bullshit (cough, lorelai) Trouble following rules: Yes, but see above A tendency to hyper-focus on a task he enjoys but he will become easily distracted if a task bores him: Maybe Problems with time management/lateness-nope Daydreams frequently- Yes, and getting lost in his books (wouldn't you do the same to cope if you were him though, let's be honest) Errrr, come to think of it, Lorelai might want to get checked out. Jess was highly intelligent and too smart for his own good. He loved reading and learning about subjects that actually interested him. Homework, tests, and studying likely bored him unless it was a subject or a specific topic he enjoyed and he felt this kind of work was beneath him. This is quite typical of those diagnosed with ADHD. He would be one of those kids (and I would know) whom the teachers describe as "Bright student, but he needs to apply himself/ not meeting his potential" I think he would have enjoyed the more rigorous academics of Chilton and the structure of a school like that could have helped him stay on the right path. It couldn't have been worse than Stars Hollow High, which failed him miserably. However I think that ultimately a place like Chilton would have felt too stuffy and restricting for him and he would be miserable being surrounded by all the rich snobby kids. Despite some road blocks, Rory survived and thrived being the "poor" transfer student, but it would have been much more uncomfortable for Jess (even with Rory being his classmate and having at least one person in the school he could lean on). Rory, at least in high school, is a lot more agreeable, docile, focused, and beholden to authority, has an involved parent and a stable home life. (I have a couple of weak theories about how he would get into Chilton and how he could even afford it, but they're really a stretch and unrealistic)

Imagine your troubled alcoholic mother dumped you on a bus to live in a weird town in another state, where you live with an uncle you barely know in an apartment above a diner where you have no privacy and said relative makes you work day and night in his diner and gloats about how he pays you in acorns, he steals your car, his most frequent customers don’t tip you, and that's on top of working a second job, there's this crazy random lady who is always getting up in your face about everything and she throws eggs at your car, the town holds an emergency meeting because you stole some spare change and drew on a sidewalk with chalk, you’re in a new school in a new state and this 6’4 diseased human pine tree named Dean Forrester tries to pick fights with you in alleways and probably tries to nail you with dodgeballs in gym class. Your dad left you when you were born and your Mom was a teenage mother who was deeply neglectful at best and abusive at worst and barely cares that you exist. Starting fom a young age you experience a revolving door of Mom's Boyfriends and Husbands, one of whom apparently died (and TJ was probably one of the best ones of the bunch, god help us all) who may or may not have been abusive to you and/or your mother. Would you be able to focus on school after all of that? He didn’t even skip school purely because he hated going or to play hookie and get into trouble, he was skipping school to work a job. If this wasn't a (barely) PG show he could have turned to drugs or alcohol (or real crime) to cope. (Oh, and all the stress of his relationship with Rory PLUS dealing with Luke, Lorelai, and Dean getting involved in that shizz too. You're not even allowed to experience the slightest grain of joy, like kissing your girlfriend without your relative breaking down the door and hauling you in for a talk on sexual impropriety. (also, your uncle thinks you're a drug dealer and an underage prostitute) There's also a lot more we still don't know about his childhood, he could have moved frequently with Liz, he could have spent time in foster homes. His education could have been interrupted on a frequent basis. He likely had a number of teachers who let him fall through the cracks or didn't believe in him or thought he was nothing but trouble wouldn't amount to anything and he lost trust in the educational system. He doesn't seem to be able to make friends in Stars Hollow (despite his declarations that he's playing sports "with the guys", lol) .It's canon that Liz drank while she was pregnant with him, which could have affected him neurologically.

His turbulent childhood likely caused him to act out at school before he arrived in The Hollow. His school district could have just slapped an ADHD label on him for his behavior. With that, I can’t imagine Liz putting in any effort into reading his report cards, noticing his grades were plummeting, seeking a diagnosis for him, taking him to counseling, trying to obtain any resources to help him, going to any parent teacher conferences, or even opening mail the school sent home. If he ever was diagnosed with a condition ike ADHD he surely had very weak supports.

I just think there are just too many external factors muddying the waters and many things that were not explored enough. I see someone who is very troubled emotionally but I don’t see many specific signs of ADHD, if any. I am much more convinced he has some social anxiety and most certainly some underlying depression and other emotional issues which are too heavy for me to try and armchair-diagnose, and I hope he will have sought some therapy once he was able to. By how much he seems to have grown by season 6, I think he did go to therapy. This concludes my diagnosis of The Boy.

[skyler10fic]

Public journaling because I need to get this out:

I'm having reflux/GERD induced by my anxiety disorder among other stress related things.

This anxiety is often triggered by spending time engaging with how awful the world is.

I do want to help raise awareness, make the world a better place, be a more informed voter, and do my duty to give everyone resources to do the same.

I cannot keep engaging with this reality at the current rate.

I struggle to set boundaries with my scrolling because it's my highest level/easiest accessible connection point with other people and something for my ADHD brain to focus on.

I cannot simply stay focused because of the ADHD. It is an inability.

At home, I do other things, like household tasks.

But I'm required to be in the office three days a week. Half days are an unofficial/coincidental accomodation.

When I'm at the office, I don't have little tasks to do. Everything is (honestly quite boring) deep thinking, high concentration work.

I cannot "just get a new, more interesting job" in a field that was always highly competitive and has been dying for 20 years. My job is very good for pay and benefits in comparison to others in my field.

So the key is I need a way to engage with people and work with my brain that isn't working against it: neither doomscrolling nor shaming myself into just staring at the screen and forcing myself to work at a slower pace so I don't have so much extra time. I can't just tell my brain not to be bored or not to need distractions.

If I get up from my desk at the office, I'm supposed to count it as break time. So I can't go on walks on the clock. If I take lots of breaks, that adds to the amount of time I'm physically at the office and cuts down on free time. (I do take 30 minute lunch and occasionally 15 minutes here and there.)

My group chats are great, but my friends have busy lives with lots of other things going on so it's not the frequency and volume of Twitter and Threads.

Almost all of my friends are far away, and the people physically close to me have resisted my efforts to increase emotional closeness and depth. They are all in for hanging out, but uncomfortable with emotions or vulnerability or friendship beyond "people I do preorganized activities with."

I can't eliminate the brain need through ADHD meds because of my liver problems (thanks for that, Strattera extremely rare side effects) and other medical risks the doc is not willing to take. Psych doc also says I need to show a positive result on the computerized ADHD $5k test my insurance doesn't pay for (created for hyperactive boys, not high achieving adult women who perform well on tests) to really consider my "attention issues" as for sure ADHD despite EVERY other medical professional verbally diagnosing me. I definitely have ADHD. This is not a question. But there doesn't seem to be a med solution anyway.

Possible solutions I'm working on:

1. More library books I can sneak glances at or listen to on my phone

2. Lists, curated social media experiences, joining more happy/low-stress groups

3. Boundaries, muting words, blocking abundantly

4. Under desk bike helps a lot when I'm not too tired

5. Standard GERD reduction tips and other physical health care

6. Mental health care

7. Listen to soothing ASMR at night

8. Physical self care (food, exercise, hydration, sleep, etc)

I think if I didn't have the ADHD creating a need that the doom sites solve (and by solve, I mean meet the immediate need by creating different problems), this would be easier. It isn't simple "addiction." It's higher up the logical food chain than that.

Today this came to a head with some emotional dysregulation: there is a big personal issue with someone I trusted potentially being a bad guy, and I can't talk about it with my local friends because they won't understand OR they are his coworkers, who can't discuss the situation with me for understandable HR reasons.

Add that stress on to the national / global doom written on the wall for political reality and history and life as we know it, and then there are Oppression Olympics competitors yelling at us that we're privileged , spoiled brats if we're upset because THEY have been marginalized worse than us and THEY aren't fazed or distressed because they are so morally superior to us BABIES who are apparently new here....

Blah blah blah

Anyway. I would very much like to get rid of this stress response in my digestive system so I can eat normal food.

[thelesbianpoirot]

Hello, I am not getting any younger and I want to jump back into the bleak lesbian dating world. Should I act like a normie to get a wife? Or should I looksmaxx and stay true to my lesbian separatist beliefs?

On one end I betray myself but on the other I’d have to do an uncomfortable amount of work to become more good looking. I don’t think women will care about my beliefs if I’m jacked.

What do you think?

Babe this is so real, people like to pretend gay women don't care about appearance and that every lesbi woman wants a low effort fat butch, but that is a BIG lie. Even gay women have preferences informed by society, few vary. So looksmaxxing will probably get you more women. I did get more attention my dating app pages when I dressed femme, but I didn't want to do that anymore, so I just get a good haircut, nice looking clothes, put stuff on my face so I don't have awful acne and take pictures in great lighting. If you can do a bit more, like working out, and buying a cool outfit or two, do it, but don't do shit you can't maintain because she'll leave you if you can't keep it up. I met a girl when I was 125 pounds, shaved and with long hair to my ass, and she did not want me when I gained 50 pounds due to health issues and buzz it all off. I have lost some of that weight, but I am definitely not 130 anymore. And I left her because I realized she didn't want me anymore, and I was not staying with someone who didn't want me after I recovered from an eating disorder. But I also don't blame her because you can't force yourself to get turned on by someone you are not. BEING JACKED HELPS A LOT but if you hate exercise, just focus on getting fit, basic walking more, stretching, eating greens, drinking water. But date while you're working on your body, so you know what the dating landscape looks like, so when you post those updated pictures, and the interactions flood in, you aren't too out of your element. SUMMARY: LOOK GOOD IN AN EASILY MAINTAINED WAY - hygienic, well-dressed, good haircut etc. It does help with dating a lot. But being an impossible to maintain transformation will never last and whatever relationship you gained because of your transformation also won't last. I don't start off relationships with strong feminist conversations, I like to slowly introduce my beliefs. You don't want to be preachy and annoying, but don't go too much against your beliefs. You'll hate being stuck with a woman who is your ideological opposite, so if you're looking for more than sex, I'll so be true to yourself, but don't bulldoze her down in conversations if she says something un-feminist, everyone has space to learn. I personally cannot date a someone heavily into trans identity, I have tried that, and I just grew to hate that person, because they would constantly try defend TIMS against any criticism, kept implying I was a trans man, and they just talked about nothing but childish things and gender. It was so cringe, I had to get out of there. Don't do that to yourself. But there is nothing wrong with not bringing up the scum manifesto to your date. Just talking about other things you might have in common before you delve too deep into specifics - books, movies, hobbies, sports. I put feminist in my bio, because I think if that dissuades any woman, she isn't my type at all. I also put "interested in sexual relationships with adult women" for the same reason. But I don't put "radical feminist aligned" because radical feminism has been given such bad press, that despite a woman agreeing with everyone of my beliefs, she might have preconceived notions implanted by anti-feminists and trans activists. Separatism is niche, not well known, so a potential woman might google it, and find some dumb article by an anti-feminist and think you're some weirdo extremist or something. Even if every time I have explained separatism to a woman, she has agreed sounds incredible. Slowly share more and more of yourself with people, don't excitedly dump all at once. It's just rude otherwise. SUMMARY: Don't try to ideologically trample normal women, but don't date your ideological opposite, people are more accepting of your beliefs after they have known you for a while.

[chachamare]

Statement from Schneider:

"Dear people. I would like to share my personal emotions and thoughts with you. The accusations from the last weeks have deeply shocked us as band and me as a person. You as fans certainly as well. [he continues saying that the newspapers content about Till is an emotional rollercoaster for the band and crew]

No, I don't believe that something illegal, like the use of k.o. drops, happened. No. I don't believe that something forbidden happened, never witnessed it and never heard any of that kind from our hundred-head crew.

Certain structures grew that go past the other band members morals and boundaries. This is also why it is important to us that Till's parties aren't confused with our aftershowparties. Everything I witnessed from Till'y parties were adults making party together. But still it seems that, despite not being illegal, things happened that I personally don't think are alright.

Till has distances himself from us in the last years and created his own bubble. With own people, own parties, own projects. That made me sad, definitely. I believe Till when he says that he wants and always wanted to make a good time for his private guests. How these guests exactly expected this [good time] seemingly differs from what he [Till] expects. [He says that the women who're know talking about the parties seemingly didn't have their wishes and expectations fulfilled and that he feels sorry and empathy for them to have been uncomfortable in uncontrollable situations]"

The rest of his statement says that every person at their aftershowparty has medical attention ready, bottles are sealed or opened by the guests themself, everyone can leave at any time safely etc. That they want all guests to feel safe and comfortable and that he feels sorry to hear that wasn't the case for everyone. Schneider further says that they have the best fans ever and that he empathizes with Shelby, that she deserved to have a great and fun evening.

He doesn't want this whole discourse to feed extremes: not the uncontrollable "beast" Social Media, telling women who're over 20 that they can't express their sexuality however they want and definitely not the victim-blaming going around so that victims still feel safe in talking about the injustice that happened to them. He wants a calm, prudent reflection and reappraisal in and outside the band. "All 6 of us, together. We stand united. Your Christoph Schneider"

[anonbinaryweirdo]

HI !! i feel like we shld get to know each other more outside of what weve already told each other sooo-

im filipino !! sometimes i use taglish (tagalog + english) when speaking <3 m a lot more fluent in english tho ;; i loveee all shades of blue, specifically periwinkle (its so pretty……..), n i also love pokemon, kny, n mha :3 (rlly hate their fanbases tho. i have. words. about them.) i have several phobias, some of them pretty weird to have as a 16y/o 😭 its uh,,, stairs, dolls, tight spaces, tiny holes, clowns, darkness n the smallest problems cause me a lot of distress… (yesterday i couldnt use spotify abroad for more than 2weeks n i was panicking for like 15 minutes until i was able to change my location 😭) i watch a lot of matpat (namely film theory n game theory), n coryxkenshin !! a few poketubers here n there (mandjtv, patterrz n pm7) but these two r who i watch mainly <3

omg

i only know English BUT I'm learning German :D (I haven't seen Duolingo in months but i can pick up on things fast)

my attention span and memory is... phew. I also tend to have a short fuse but I'm very patient and I can control myself I promise pls don't run away from me. also my first instinct when someone does something to upset my friend is to get physical (and if it's through screen I can argue for hours. one of my teachers+ bestie said I could run for something (governor, president, etc.. I forgor)

green. i love greens I love them all sm. I like earthy colors but green <333

i curse... a lot :D

i also watch a lot of matpat !! I'm also an 8bitryan (my comfort YouTuber fr) and Kubz Scouts enthusiast 🫶🏽

i also like kny and mha !! Nezuko n Kaminari my loves <3 (t.. the fanbases.......//neg)

I'm typically calm in situations most of the time, save for when I'm not going feral and committing arson on this very blog

I'm not scared of much? probably adults that are over 25 but other than that nothing IMMEDIATELY comes to minspiders.

I use endearments a lot !! despite being the (so far as I know) second youngest of all my mutuals I call (as long as I know they're comfortable with it) a lot of them "baby," chances are I'll use platonic endearments on you too out of habit so lmk if this makes you uncomfortable <3

i love kids 🫶🏽 I helped raise a few and I was/am a babysitter,, love them just as much as I love dogs

i like. i like to ramble and rant (as you're seeing rn). don't let me find out we have a similar interest AND you allow rambling I'll go crazy real fast. speaking of I hyperfixations I fixate on a lot of things at the same time sosjksj(rihh now its mainlty Hamilton and Genshin)

i can't remember much (like. birthdays, names, dates, or anything you might have told me two seconds ago. i probably zoned out or it just flew past my head) but I do (try to) remember small details about people :D

I am. not on any medication for adhd so I go insane on here. a lot. my thoughts are js.. if I think it I say it and THEN think about what I've said AFTER I say it and bang my head against the table in shame

i like collecting leaves

i also like women but I mean I guess men are attractive too

[zisurru]

Top 5 vc scenes

5. armand’s imprisonment and torture/riccardo’s death (TVA). one of the emotional low points that defines his character

4. gabrielle’s hair grows back (TVL). gabrielle’s horror at her hair isn’t really about the hair - it’s about the fear of being trapped by a rigid gender role, and specifically seeing that prison symbolized in an unchanging body. i also like the bit where lestat, bewildered, says that he’ll cut gabrielle’s hair every night, even if he doesn’t understand why this is important to her. he’s in the dark as to the exact nature of her distress, but is willing to do his best to solve it. i think lestat’s connection with women gets a lot shallower in the later books, so i treasure this moment.

3. louis’s turning (IWTV). iconic for a reason. beautiful imagery in this scene…

2. louis and claudia argue (“because you are a beautiful child”) (IWTV). i like this scene because every source of strife in their relationship is present but mostly unspoken. it’s a tense, sad moment for both of them. claudia brings up sex, which makes louis intensely uncomfortable and draws attention to the elephant in the room: he doesn’t really see her as an adult peer. despite what claudia might want, part of him still sees her as a little girl, and claudia hates him for it.

1. lestat’s death and rebirth at the hands of magnus. one of the most emotionally arresting parts of the series for me. fantastical gothic imagery is used to depict a plethora of harrowing human experiences: stalking, abduction, rape, trauma, isolation & alienation, objectification. thorny combinations of feelings like attachment & pleasure mingled with fear & violation. i love the descriptions of lestat’s emotional state after the fact, and vampirism allows us the brutal imagery of someone vomiting up blood and then getting down on their knees to lick it from the floor.

[ruminate88]

A Toxic Relationship vs. A Healthy Relationship:

Unfortunately I’ve been in quite a few toxic relationships not just romantically but with friendships too. I had that friend growing up that we did everything together. We even took showers together lol (not in that way.) Just literally we could get dressed in front of each other. we were both girls, she was an only child and we spent the night at each other’s house on most weekends and it just was normal. I didn’t think anything about it until I am an adult… I get uncomfortable because now we’re grown women and I’m not gay, so it started to bother me A LOT but I didn’t know how to tell her without hurting her feelings 😔 because we had been that way since we were little!!! We had always shared our secrets but now that I’m 23, I am not wanting to tell her everything anymore because some things are just too private and I know that she’ll run and tell her mom everything. 🤪 Her mom wanted to be in the middle controlling everything and I didn’t understand why!! by the time I’m 23, I attempted to set boundaries with Lori, that is when Lori and her mom started showing up to my house often unannounced, banging on the door, demanding that I talk to them and I couldn’t handle it anymore. So I started ignoring them and then eventually I wrote Lori a three page letter, explaining to her that I’m suffocated by her and that this friendship is one-sided. It’s not going to work out. It hurt me to push her out of my life. I didn’t have anyone to talk to anymore, and that was the first time I truly felt loneliness, but I was growing up despite her mom wanting us to stay little and wanted us to continue to tell her all of our secrets! I didn’t even tell my OWN mom my secrets because I wanted privacy as a 23 year-old!!!!

However, when it came to romantic relationships, these men seemed almost obsessed with me and the way that they mirror me and mirror my sexuality, gave me a crazy high and I was a very sexual person behind-the-scenes 😳😳😳 nobody that truly knew me, knew how sexual I was back then and honestly, that was my biggest downfall. I am ashamed of who I used to be. Obviously I was not a nice girl. I was very comfortable sending my nudes to my ex-boyfriends. Also because it got me the attention that I craved so bad 😝 who doesn’t like getting attention and who doesn’t like being told your beautiful, especially by handsome men? it’s just not healthy though and when you’re away from these toxic men, they consume your every thought, your every feeling, they just consume you completely…. There is zero boundaries and you would think after I set boundaries with Lori, that I would want boundaries with these ex-boyfriend. I was just so lonely after Lori. I guess I needed someone to fill those shoes!? 🤷🏻‍♀️ I needed someone to be in the shower with, to tell my secrets to, someone to laugh with, but there is no laughing with these toxic men 🤨 not once could I be funny with my exes or could I feel comfortably free to be my honest self!!! I couldn’t tell them whatever I wanted, it was very controlling and manipulative . The atmosphere is suffocating and you just don’t get to be yourself with them 😓 You are trying to be somebody that these men want and as long as I was sending them my nudes, then they would pay me attention and tell me I was beautiful so then I felt wanted and loved, but that’s so sad. It leaves you even more lonely and cold afterwards!!!

i’ve literally had one healthy relationship so far and it’s new territory for me. It’s so foreign and weird but I know it’s right and I know it’s what I’ve needed all along.🥺 So my husband isn’t obsessed with me, he doesn’t want to be with me 24/7 plus there’s no taking showers together all the time , there’s no telling me what to do or wanting to see me naked all the time 😜 I mean we’ve had times of intimacy and romance, but for the most part, we’re not thinking about each other every second. We’re not suffocating each other. He’s got a job, he goes to work all day so he’s busy working and then he talks to me when he gets home. It’s just so weird and different. I can’t explain how different it is and there’s “boundaries”, there’s “privacy” and there’s limits!!! There’s respect. Truly it’s just so different and when I first got married, I thought “oh we’re going to shower all the time together” but I realize my husband doesn’t want to that every day 🥴 at first I thought what’s wrong, does he not think I’m pretty enough? Why doesn’t he want to do that with me? (His own wife) Eventually, I realized it’s not about that at all. It’s about he simply wants privacy and boundaries and he’s normal. He doesn’t think like me!! I’ve had a toxic mindset for so long because I’ve only had toxic relationships!!!! There is moments where my husband shows that he’s attracted to me and he comes home to me every day, he pays the bills, he provides for me, so I feel like it’s just so different and he wants me to do my own thing, to take care of myself and I’m just not used to a man wanting me to take care of myself 🥺😳🙏🏻In my past, all my relationships wanted me to take care of them. 😓 It was never about me.

This has been a major adjustment for me. It’s taken me years into the marriage to get a hold of the fact this is not a toxic relationship. ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹 we are not obsessed with each other but yet my husband talks about getting “old together” 🥺🥰 so that lets me know that even though we’re not obsessed with each other, we’re going to spend forever together and it’s just blows my mind!!! I can hardly believe it! It’s so crazy to me! ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

[hourglass-dreams]

Angst/Whump Isabela Madrigal Headcanons🥀🌵

Disclaimer: this is going to be a similar warning I had for the Bruno headcanons. These are going to discuss the subjects of generational trauma, body image issues and eating disorder behavior. This is not meant to make the movie about something it isn't.

I will not go into graphic details about any of the more sensitive subject matter. But one of these will have a trigger warning and this symbol "⚠️"

If you disagree with me that is fine! But, please.. don't be hateful.

Anyways... on with the list. 🥀

There have been so many times in her life where she didn't feel like she was a human being. She either felt like she was a monster because her pent up anger and resentment or she felt like an object to be admired just to be tossed away later.

Almost every adult in the Encanto tells her that she looks so much like her abuela. This started out as an honor, she loved her abuela so of course she'd want to resemble her in some aspects but as she got older, she began to hate when people said that. It felt more like an obligation rather than a compliment. Like, since she looked like abuela, she had to BECOME abuela and NEVER let her down no matter what.

Despite her being "the golden child' she actually saw Mirabel as more of her parents "favorite". Mirabel could actually bond more with their dad, be honest with her feelings, and live a "normal life". Without even meaning to, their parents did pay more attention to Mirabel and it made her feel so inadequate.

When she was in her mid to late teens, she realized that the "crushes" she had on guys were very forced and she could never relate to the other girls that fell head over heels for guys in the village. But she knew she was attracted to other women and this terrified her. Not because her family had anything against it, but because if she did date or marry a woman, she would be going against her abuela's wishes and she was scared of being shunned by the family.

Even though Mariano was deeply in love with Isabela, he knew she wasn't in love with him. She was so uncomfortable and distant towards him when it came to anything romantic when they were alone, and when they were around people, it felt fake. Neither of them wanted to cause conflict so they never discussed it.

TRIGGER WARNING FOR THE NEXT ONE: ⚠️

⚠️

Because of the emphasis so many people put on her "perfected performance", it caused her to very self conscious and aware of her actions, words and looks. This included her eating behaviors. She started eating less and less until the family was noticing and it made some members very concerned. So Isabela started to eat "normally" but then engage in purging behaviors. Though she tried really hard to hide this, Dolores found out and confronted her about it. She became so weak that the flowers she grew were dull in color and couldn't think clearly. Luckily this didn't last long enough to cause permanent damage to her body. But the urge to fall back into those patterns never quite go away. ⚠️

Isabela and Dolores were very close when they were little, but started drifting apart around their preteens. Dolores fell into Isabela's shadow and she started resenting her (even though she never expressed this outwardly). This caused their cousin relationship to be strained for years until after Casita was rebuilt, they rebuilt their connection. Isabela still feels bad about Dolores being shoved into the back, though she didn't have much control over that.

There were so many times where Isa broke down in her room at night. She eventually stopped doing this when she just grew numb to everything.

(Again I might add to this ^^)

[opinated-user]

The whiplash I get from reading any other Rey pairing and Alirey is wild.

Reylo: Kylo inevitably has to apologize to Rey for his toxicity, betraying her and threatening her before he can even have a shot at befriending her, let alone getting with her romantically. He has to reverse the entire course of his life for her and she is still in control of her own life even in fics where they get married, have their happily ever after and have kids. Reyhux: Hux has to apologize for his active role in fascism and destroy the First Order in order to be with her in virtually every fic I've found. As with Kylo, he has to start working to undo the damage he's done before she'll give him the time of day. Hux arguably has a lot more to undo and atone for, so narratives for this ship have Rey hold him accountable, showing that her opinions and thoughts are valid and matter. Finnrey: Finn has real regret about wanting, even if only initially, to leave and not join the fight against the First Order, and is inspired by Rey's conviction to be his best self. He has trust issues from being in the FO and she has trust issues from being abandoned, requiring them to learn how to navigate romance and interpersonal relationships together at the same time. Reyluke, Reyleia and Reyhan: Even these, the age gap pairings I can't stand, have her love interest treat her like an adult they can converse with, despite the personality clashes and disagreements. They don't call all the shots like Aliana does - the narratives treat Rey like a person, not an accessory someone else can have sex with. Reypoe: Poe's tendency to throw himself into harm's way and lack of ability to follow orders leads to personality clashes and although he and Rey have different methodology for fighting the First Order, they communicate and work side by side as equals towards a common goal, often learning and growing alongside one another along the way. Reyrose: Rose's complete lack of processing her sister's death often leads her in fics to be protective and stifling and this means that often some kind of fight about holding on too tightly to people ensues. This is in and of itself better than Alirey because Rey has the agency to voice an objection.

In every other ship, including the ones that make me deeply uncomfortable, Rey has agency. She talks to people, she makes decisions, she does not cave to their every wish and desire, she doesn't stand back and watch them do everything whilst she tends to the ship and the kids. She has consent. She consents to or refuses things.

In Alirey, she exists entirely to be hot and have sex with Aliana, in addition to tending to the ship. Later, she tends to the kids. She does not inspire anyone to be their best selves, change people's minds, challenge their complacency in their flaws, go against the status quo or seek out justice by herself when others will not.

Alirey reduces Rey to the position of trophy wife. Trying to say he's nonbinary and then switching that to him being a trans man does not make it better. Arguably I'd say it makes it worse, as it gives us a trans man occupying the role of subservient parenting spouse who's super hot that the author stand-in can bang at any time without changing any of that, effectively writing a trans man as the same trophy wife one would expect to see a cis woman written as. And the implication there, that trans men and cis women are the same thing, is deeply gross to me.

I know Lily wants us to talk about her fic and not her habit of looking at 3D, photorealistic images/videos of kids having sex but Lily? Diverting attention from your pedophilia onto transphobia, sexism and transandrophobia is not a good diversion. It's not making people forget the porn, and it's not making you look better, either.

i'm not a person who personally enjoys romance too much, but i'm still positively confused as to how someone who claims to love the genre can be so incompetent at writing just one couple for anyone to want to see together. if you wrote a couple in which i wish any of the parts would get away to do their own life in another galaxy, then i don't know how to manage to do that while pretending that it's a wholesome equal partnership.

[radkindoffeminist]

Unhinged Anon 2

Message 3

More baseless accusations which I’m not going to respond to. Keep insulting me because I don’t give a shit. Wait, you can’t because I blocked your dumbass.

Message 4

How are they finding womanhood ‘beautiful, wonderful, joyful, and life changing’ when they have never experienced it? Right, because they don’t understand womanhood as they are not women. They find beauty and joy in at least one of the following 2 things:

A) Misogynistic stereotypes surrounding what they believe to be womanhood and how much women enjoy these things. Think of things like being catcalled (which many have admitted to loving despite most women finding uncomfortable as it’s harassment), male attention in general, girly sleepovers, etc. This is not what womanhood is; this is a male fantasy of womanhood.

B) Femininity. They like dresses and heels and getting their nails done. No harm in them enjoying these things but that’s not womanhood. That’s misogynistic stereotypes of what women should be doing.

How can women love being women so much that they want to ‘reflect that in how they look, dress, etc’? What you are talking about here is misogynistic stereotypes and femininity, not womanhood. There is no one way to look, act, or dress like a woman, yet your response implies that there is. Woman are adult human females and regardless of if you’re feminine, masculine, or androgynous you will continue to be a woman. Calling me the misogynistic one for believing that is just projection. 

Trans women have done nothing for the LGB community but continue to spread homophobic conversion therapy rhetoric. Want receipts of this? Go check out @tra-receipts​ and the masterpost on trans homophobia. Your denial of gay history and refusal to see that gay people actually fought for their own rights because you want to credit literally everything to trans women is homophobia.

As for the rest of the post, I’ll await your receipts of me calling all trans people creeps, being cruel towards innocent people, and spreading violent misinformation. 

Message 5

Hey, look, homophobia! Ironic given how many times you’ve already called me homophobic!

No one is reducing people to their genitals. That is a lie that TRAs continue to repeat because you have no understanding of what it means to actually reduce people to their genitals and because you continue to twist radfem arguments rather than trying to understand what we say. To reduce someone down to their genitals means that you see them as nothing more than walking genitals (or other reproductive organs). It means not seeing them as a whole person with a personality and likes and dislikes and hobbies and interests; but seeing them just as a set of genitals.

The radical feminist argument is that women have vaginas. That does not mean we see women as only valuable due to having vaginas but rather that it’s the common characteristic that all women have as a result of being female (since, as stated before, women are adult human females). Women have hobbies and likes and interests and preferences. Women are all unique. But women all have this common characteristic as a result of our biological sex: we all have vaginas. Why is it that when we talk about the common characteristics that women have you accuse us of reducing women to their genitals but you don’t do this to any other group? When we say lesbians are female homosexuals, you don’t tell us that we are reducing lesbians to their attraction to women and that we must see them as being sex-crazed as a result. When we say that black people are people of a certain race, you don’t tell us that we are reducing black people to their skin colour and that we must see them as dumb criminals (or some other racist stereotypes). No, in these cases you understand that we are describing the common characteristics which a specific group shares and that doesn’t mean that we see it as the only or even most important aspect of that person but rather just one of many characteristics about them. But when it comes to women being adult human females that’s actually reducing them to their genitals? Fuck off.

Many aspects go into if someone is attracted to a specific person and what genitals that person has is a part of that attraction and trying to deny that’s the reality for people of all sexualities is ignorant and homophobic. Gay people are attracted to the same sex, not the same gender. Telling gay people that they must be attracted to everyone who identifies as the same gender as them is homophobic and continues to spread conversion therapy rhetoric. You are no better that conservative homophobes who tell gay people that they need to get over their genitals obsession or that lesbians just haven’t had the right dick yet or that they should at least try PIV because they can’t know that they don’t like it until they try or that they should try a sexless relationship with the opposite sex. Everything you say on this subject is literally recycled homophobia and you have the audacity to sit there and tell me that I’m the evil homophobe? You’re fucking disgusting!

And, as always, I’m not responding to your insults and baseless accusations that I’m an unsafe person who’s dangerous to society. Come explain exactly why that’s true with receipts of what I’ve done to make people feel unsafe.

[lizzygrantarchives]

Spin or Bin, October 27, 2012

At the luxurious Four Seasons Hotel in Singapore, Lana Del Rey, dressed in a simple yellow dress and red Vans shoes, welcomed me with open arms as I entered the room. The 26-year-old singer-songwriter shook my hands with a sweet smile. “Hey, how are you again?” she asked. She remembered me as I first met her when she played a show in Sydney three months ago. “Have you been busy? I hope you have been coping well,” smiled Del Rey as she sat down on the vacant couch. I really admire how down-to-earth she is despite being so successful. She made me feel calm and at ease, like a longtime friend of hers during the entire interview where she revealed that music is not her first passion and that the interview questions posed were ‘interesting’! (Thanks to our Twitter followers). Check out the full interview below!

How did you get the name Lana Del Rey?

When I was younger I felt like I wasn’t the person I was supposed to become yet. I had a vision for myself that was as beautiful as I wanted the music to be. I generally don’t deny my creative impulses so that was just one of those creative impulses that I had.

What can we expect after the release of Born To Die: The Paradise Edition, will you still be releasing another album?

The only thing I have really been working on is helping two directors score two different movies. It’s not too in-depth, just writing songs for two different films. Actually I have to call Universal to ask if I’m supposed to reveal the movies. One of the movies is coming out in June next year. What I really like to do is start writing music for films, it’s a really natural place for me. Most of the people I work with are already composers so it’s a good fit. That’s really the only ambition that I have.

You posed nude in British GQ magazine recently, what makes you do that?

I just like how beautiful naked women are. I love seeing girls’ skin in pictures. I have all the old Playboy magazines from the 60s and 70s. I love the look of girls with red lips and shiny skin. I am a big fan of the female form. So for me, it wasn’t uncomfortable.

Why did you decide for your latest music video Ride to be so lengthy like a 10 full minutes?

I really love movies as much as I love music. When I made my first record, I felt like I have to tell my stories through words and now I wanna wrap it up by telling my stories through pictures.

How were your teenage years like?

They were interesting. I stopped drinking 10 years ago just because I felt like a person who like trying new things and feel different. You do things so fast, you end up having so many different lifestyles all in one short time. Aside from that, I always felt like I have been around for a long time. My mother said that when I was seven, I used to think that I was an adult. When I was at all the parties, I talk to people like they were my friends.

Did you expect Born To Die to have so much success?

When I made that record, I brought it to a lot of different record labels and they weren’t interested in it because it was sort of weird. It wasn’t party music, my music was more down beat. People who got involved in it kind of got involved with it as a passion project. My photographer was my sister and my little brother was helping me. I was making my own movie stills from videos I took from YouTube. I have been doing that for a long time so I felt like if it was gonna work, it would have worked a long time ago. So no, I didn’t expect the success at all.

How do you feel when you feel like you got the attention of people?

I think the attention came with such a negative spin on the other side. It never really felt like it was something I could sit back and enjoy. I felt more like I have to guard the songs and protect them to make sure their future was protected. I really believed in the record, the music and the producers who have worked on it. I felt like I have no idea what is going to happen now.

How did you find this lush sound?

I found this young guy named Justin Parker and he always brought me different chords that he really likes. Originally when I started, I was just recording songs in my room and sending it to people to put music to. But then I found Justin, he started bringing me chords for Video Games and I started free styling. Eventually, I started free styling on all my songs like Video Games, Born To Die and Ride were all done on the spot in one take. But other songs like Summertime Sadness and Blue Jeans, I worked slowly with different composers.

What was it like working with ASAP Rocky on the National Anthem video?

I love him! When I told him I wanted him to play JFK in the video, he was totally down for it. ASAP Rocky and Azealia Banks are the only people I relate to these days.

What was the quirkiest item you received from a fan?

A crucifix necklace that is also a help whistle. I wore it for one of my videos although it was weird.

Do you have any special name for your fans?

No because all the other girls have such good names for their fans. I don’t have any names for them but they do run the show. They know they are in charge. (laughs)

How do you cope with fame?

I really hope I still feel inspired to write the way I used to a few years ago. When I first found writing, it was really new. I felt like I was doing something no one has ever done before. In California, I take a lot of walks and I drive on my own. No one ever said anything to me and I have my brother and sister with me there. When I leave America, it gets a little crazier. To be honest, when I’m talking to people with interesting questions like this interview, that is really good. And then the rest of it, I’m not sure about…

Some of your videos are controversial, what’s your take on controversy?

That’s a really good question! I think I wanted respect more than I wanted anything else. I considered myself a writer because writing is my passion. I hope I would have respect from journalists. I don’t welcome controversy as much as I welcome more creative collaboration with amazing people. When I wrote the record, it seemed more like I was trying to capture a moment in time. But with Ride was a little different, that would seem really fucking weird to people. The rest of it I don’t think it is that controversial.

Who is Lana Del Rey beyond music and all these attention from the public? Who are you really?

Although I love music, it is not my first passion. When I decided to stop drinking 10 years ago, my passion was working with homeless outreach, drugs and alcohol rehabilitation. I lived in New York for 10 years so that’s my job for real. I would say music doesn’t really feel like my true calling.

What are your all time three favourite movies?

Don’t Look Back by D.A. Pennebaker that covers Bob Dylan’s 1965 concert tour in the UK. It’s fucking crazy! I love American Beauty and The Godfather part one and two.

You wrote a song called Ghetto Baby for Cheryl Cole, how did that come about?

We have the same boss at Polydor and they thought Cheryl would like the song so they played it to her. She loved it and decided to record it.

Many people tried to define your music, what will you personally call it?

I would say it is film-made, really visual and reflective.

Originally published on spinorbinmusic.com with the headline Lana Del Rey Reveals All In Intimate Interview: “Music Is Not My First Passion.” Click here to view photos from the interview, conducted on October 25, 2012.