#and she thinks i should take an otc sleeping pill (i told her about how sometimes i lie in bed for hours and hours unable to sleep

[fingertipsmp3]

So the doctor’s appointment… went. I don’t know if I’d say it went well, but it certainly went

[artificialqueens]

(Love)Sick Overseas (Phianca) - Albatross

AN: Phi Phi is feeling a bit under the weather but determined not to let it ruin her vacation. And who should she happen to run into on her way back from picking up cold medicine but Bianca Del Rio?

Just a short, fluffy little Phianca sickfic. And yes, I do think they’d be cute together and no, @VeronicaSanders, there will be no Bitney sequel. No Bitney, ever.

Getting sick in the middle of his trip to the UK had certainly not been part of Jaremi’s plan. No, he had been looking forward to this excursion for months and he’d be damned if something like the sniffles was going to stop him. At first it wasn’t even anything too serious; just a sneeze every now and then or a runny nose in the morning. But by the fourth day it was clear the symptoms were not going away…if anything they were getting worse.

But Jaremi was stubborn, if nothing else.

A bit of cold medicine until it all passed and he’d be fine…at least, that’s what he told himself.

Now here he was, returning from his second trip to pick up some OTC cold remedy and his nose was already protesting mightily. Even his throat was starting to feel scratchy but Jaremi was determined to continue his vacation plans uninterrupted. So what if his head was a little foggy or he was slightly unsteady on his feet every now and then?

Drinking had the same effect so all was good to his mind.

With enough effort he could remember his way around the city and all the places he wanted to visit and that was fine with him. Once he returned to the hotel with this last batch of cold medicine, he’d be off for a bit of shopping around town. Who knows? He might just find some new inspiration for his drag looks while he’s out there. That’d certainly be a plus.

As he was pondering over which stores he wanted to stop at first, a vibration from his pocket captured his attention. Curiously, he pulled the phone from his cargo shorts and felt his heart jolt a little as he recognized the name flashing across the screen. No other than ‘Roy/Bianca’ along with a small icon showing a fully beat and smiling face of the queen in question.

Somewhat amused and certainly wondering as to what his long-time friend could possibly need, Jaremi answered the phone on the fourth ring with a pleasant, “Hello?”

“Turn around, bitch,” came the joking voice on the other end.

Almost painfully, Jaremi instantly twisted himself around at Roy’s insistence and found the older queen speedwalking to meet him. The sharp turn caused his head to spin a little more than it ought have but Jaremi pushed the feeling aside as he greeted his close friend with a bright grin. Before he could even ask what Roy was doing here, he felt a light and friendly rap to his arm as the older queen bitched him out, “I was calling your name for the last two minutes. Looked like a fucking idiot with you ignoring me! You got earbuds in or something, bitch?”

Scratching the back of his head in embarrassment, Jaremi admittedly vaguely that he had just been lost inside his own thoughts for the last block or so. Rolling his eyes, Roy accepted the answer and asked what Jaremi was doing all the way out here.

“Vacation. Sightseeing,” the younger queen replied. “Just relaxing for once. What about you? Got another show out here or something?”

He knew that answer was unlikely. Not that he stalked Bianca’s tour schedule by any means, but he often made sure he was at least up to date on known shows and as of two days ago he was sure Roy was still tucked away somewhere in the US doing god-knows-what for his next tour. So it came as little surprise when Roy replied with a shrug of his shoulders, “No, just on vacation, too, I guess. If you could call it that. Courtney has some event next week and asked for my help. Figured I’d make a real trip out of it in the meantime. Relax too, you know?”

Nodding in perfect understanding, Jaremi knew all too well what Roy meant. After all, he was one of the hardest working queens in the business. He hardly ever took time off for himself. Even when he wasn’t touring, he always had his hand in something whether it was for a future project or just to help another performer. It was admirable but often Jaremi wondered if Roy would eventually burn out going on like this. It wasn’t his business but he did worry from time to time. More than he’d ever admit verbally to anyone. 

Even now Roy seemed a bit anxious just to be doing something and seeing Jaremi must have felt like a godsend as he immediately proposed that the two head out for lunch and catch up. Jaremi could see that he was itching to talk about something of substance and didn’t have the heart to say ‘no’ or even to delay until later in the day. So he simply followed Roy in a state of reluctant obedience as he eagerly led them off down the street to a cafe he’d spotted the day he arrived. Roy had already been on his way there when he found Jaremi so it almost felt like a sign from the universe to invite the younger queen…if Roy believed in that sort of thing.

Though their styles of drag were quite a bit different, especially with Phi Phi lending herself more to cosplay as of late, there were still a number of similarities the two had bonded over. Whether it was creating new and unique looks, comparing tips on how to overcome certain costume design challenges, or just an easygoing kiki with one another as they gossiped over whatever drama had recently been stirred up in their drag centered universe. There was never a lack of topics to discuss, though today Jaremi seemed a bit out of it.

Normally he had a sharp wit, far more than what he’d normally dare say around most other queens, yet this afternoon he wasn’t nearly as quick with the shady remarks. Instead he let Roy dominate the conversation almost entirely rather their typical back and forth. Despite how much Jaremi had tried to hide it, he could feel his mind growing increasingly cloudy as their meal went on. He wished at the very least he had taken some of the medication he had brought but it almost felt a little rude to do so. If only he could subtly sneak off to take some of the pills but even going to the bathroom whilst carrying the bag would have been suspicious.

So all he could do was suffer in silence as his nose began to clog up and his throat felt increasingly dry in spite of however much he drank. And though Roy didn’t comment on it, he had certainly noticed the change from their typical kiki sessions. At first he thought Jaremi was simply tired, and once or twice he worried he was actually boring him, but still Jaremi was trying his hardest to pay attention, not even sparing a glance to his phone, so Roy figured it had to be something else.

One of Jaremi’s usual habits was to go all out on desserts, sampling at least one or two with every meal in a foreign country, but today he declined to even look at that particular menu. It was then that Roy knew for certain something was definitely off with the younger man. As they awaited their checks, he questioned his companion quite bluntly, “What’s up with you, queen? You’ve been out of it since we got here.”

Jaremi faltered for a moment before immediately trying to defend himself but Roy’s withering gaze stopped him mid-sentence. Ashamed, he reluctantly admitted that he was getting sick and hadn’t had a chance to take his next round of medicine before Roy had caught him on the street. He expected Roy to withdraw in concern for his own health because after all, his voice was his money maker, but instead Roy did something quite unexpected. He actually scooted his chair closer and around the table as he touched Jaremi’s wrist in concern. His brows knit together in sympathy that sharply contrasted his exasperated voice asking, “Why didn’t you say something? We could have done this another day! Or even just waited until we got back to the states!”

Shrugging Jaremi tried to play off the situation as though it weren’t as big a deal as Roy was making it. His voice was quiet and starting to show evidence of his illness as he replied, “It’s fine, really. The symptoms aren’t too bad. And it’s been awhile since we talked…It was nice just to catch up by ourselves.”

Shaking his head, Roy muttered, “Idiot.”

The statement would have been more scathing had it come from anyone else but Jaremi’s heart felt like fluttering again as he heard Roy state quite definitively, “Let’s get you back to your hotel.”

Their checks arrived at that moment and despite how usually he’d do anything to keep himself from acting like a child in front of strangers, Jaremi couldn’t stop himself from whining, “I have plans!”

“I don’t really care,” Roy declared apathetically with his trademark glare. “You’re going back to your hotel even if I have to walk you to your room myself.”

The pair stared each other down and if Jaremi had any intention of disobeying Roy’s demand, he ought to have pretended to give in right then but the silent argument went on long enough for Roy to figure out that he’d better follow through on his initially empty threat. Otherwise Jaremi would be back on the streets as soon as his back was turned, probably hacking up phlegm in just a few hours to boot. 

No, if he wanted Jaremi to rest, he’d have to escort him back to his hotel and wait until the younger man fell asleep. Which shouldn’t be too long considering how heavy-lidded his eyes already looked.

Much like a rent-a-cop on duty, Roy ushered the protesting queen back to his hotel room. To his surprise it took little more than a sharp glare and a few cutting words to convince Jaremi to take his medication and at least sit on the bed. Beyond that, Jaremi utterly refused to do anything else to indulge Roy’s unwanted mothering. He was all but pouting and nearly on the verge of a temper tantrum that would have rivaled one of Alaska’s yet Roy stood firm with remarkable patience.

“Sleep will be good for you,” he reasoned in as best of a persuasive tone as could be managed, “You already look like you’re about to drop from exhaustion anyway.”

Jaremi couldn’t stop his eyes from rolling at the statement, however true it might be. His muscles were starting to give out and probably the only thing that kept him going right now was his desire to defy the older queen at every turn. But Roy was determined to outlast him. Despite how eager he was for something meaningful to do earlier; getting a sick Jaremi to relax and go to sleep seemed far more important. Deciding to take an approach he had followed a number of times before, he made a shooing motion with his hand and told him to lie on his stomach.

Skeptical, Jaremi only gave him a brief glance, essentially saying, ‘The fuck?’

Rolling his eyes once more, Roy urged him, “Just do it. I’m not gonna do anything sketchy or weird.”

Still, Jaremi was unconvinced…at least until he heard a quiet, almost suspiciously gentle attempt at persuasion, “I promise….Please lay down?”

It was highly unusual to hear such a tone from Roy. Typically he’d just give up after awhile or make some sort of scathing remark but today he was actually being…soft. It was a little off-putting but Jaremi found that he genuinely liked seeing this more caring side of his friend. Thinking at the very least he trusted Roy not to do anything unwholesome, Jaremi relented and laid on his stomach in the middle of the bed while his head rested on a pillow.

He turned to look at Roy as he carefully set himself down on the edge of the mattress so as not to cause it to dip any more than necessary. Just as the younger man was wondering what he planning, he felt the light trace, almost scratching of fingertips running across the expanse of his back. An involuntary shiver rose through his spine at the sensation but much to his surprise he found himself almost leaning into the touch for more.

His voice bordered on a happy purr as he admitted, partially muffled by the pillow, “That feels really good, actually.”

Practically hearing the smirk Roy was undoubtedly wearing, the older man mentioned, “Yeah, Adore loves it when I do this whenever she gets sick or hungover.”

Then almost immediately thinking better of it, he quickly added, “That doesn’t leave this room.”

There was an edge to his voice that caused Jaremi’s stomach to turn but all he gave Roy in response was a content nod. As was the Roy’s intention, the body beside him was slowly relaxing and drifting off to a lazy lull of a sleeplike state. Almost as an afterthought, and perhaps mostly influenced by his sick addled mind, Jaremi found the courage to ask, “What is going on between you two any way?”

This was a common topic of debate amongst the queens and fans alike but no one really had a satisfying answer. Figuring now was as good a time as any, Jaremi took his chance to ask Roy directly. Sounding quite used to the question, the older queen replied with a chuckle in his voice, “What do you think?”

He genuinely wanted an answer, Jaremi realized, and would wait very patiently until the younger man gave him one. Almost guiltily, he forced himself to examine both his own feelings and what he’d observed first and secondhand of the two queens’ atypical relationship. Sounding unsure yet still a bit hopeful, Jaremi answered softly, “I think…you’re just really good friends.”

He turned his head up to face Roy and study his reaction yet much to his surprise, he found a calm, pleased smile waiting for him. The elder queen nodded his head in confirmation and it was there they let that particular conversation drop. Burying his face into the pillow for a minute, Jaremi couldn’t deny just how light and happy he felt. His heart was racing and he was sure his illness had nothing to do with it but either way, he was satisfied with what he had learned.

He was almost at the point of falling asleep when Roy drew back his fingers. Jaremi’s drowsy eyes reopened and he turned to look at the older queen once more. He was mildly surprised to find Roy sliding fully onto the bed to lay beside him.

Trying not to let on just how happy was, Jaremi slowly drawled out, “Gonna stay here till I fall asleep?”

There was a hint of a smirk resting on Roy’s lips as he replied casually, “Maybe a little after that too…Is that alright?”

Feeling like a child who’d just gotten everything and more that they could ever want for Christmas, Jaremi nodded his head and bit back a quiet yawn. 

Roy’s eyes had gone noticeably soft as he gazed down at the half sleeping form beside him, still struggling futilely to stay awake. He almost chuckled at the fruitless effort but hid it behind a fond smile instead. He raised a hand to ruffle Jaremi’s hair and urged him once more to finally go to sleep. This time there was no protest, no argument as the younger queen nodded and nestled himself snugly amongst the pillows. 

In another very un-Roy-like behavior, he leant down and pressed a brief kiss to Jaremi’s cheek. In truth it was just a little too close the lips to have been accidental but Jaremi was all too willing to let that slide for the time being. All he said in response through his bright grin was a sing-songy declaration of, “You’re gonna get sick tomorrow.”

Shaking his head, Roy laughed softly and affirmed quite adamantly, “I’m not gonna get sick.”

“You’re definitely gonna get sick,” Jaremi mumbled half into the pillow as his eyes slid shut.

Whatever Roy said in response was muffled and unheard as Jaremi dozed off into a content, dream-filled state. True to Roy’s assertions, the next day he felt perfectly fine. Not a trace of Jaremi’s cold to be found in his system. The day after however…that was another story.

[invisiblefoxfire]

PERSONAL ANECDOTE TIME

Several months after major surgery I was still having a lot of pain. OTC painkillers did nothing. The pain was severe enough that I couldn’t sleep. So I went to my doctor and said, after the surgery I was given Tramadol, and it was the only thing that helped with this pain. But they only gave me slow-release Tramadol that came in high doses (100 mg tablets that lasted all day) and I didn’t want to have that much in my system. I still had most of the tablets, months later, because I just didn’t like being doped up all day. I showed my doctor the unused pills so she could see that I wasn’t addicted or anything, I am capable of using them in moderation. I asked: could I get a lower dose of Tramadol, just to use now and then on really bad days? I’d only take it maybe a couple of times a week, when it was really bad. So I could get a little sleep.

And her answer?

ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT (I’m paraphrasing). Tramadol is an OPIOID. Those are BAD and DANGEROUS and ADDICTIVE and have SIDE EFFECTS.

So what should I do? I asked. I can’t sleep. I’m in pain all the time. I can’t live like this. I’m depressed because I’m in pain all the time. Life doesn’t feel worth living if it feels like this. I just want something to relieve the pain every now and then. Please help me.

Well normally we don’t do anything about this kind of pain. [pause for me to try to hold back tears] Well, I can understand that must be disappointing for you.

Finally she agreed to give me something. Something that is “specifically for nerve pain”, she called it. I’d never heard of it. I said I’d try anything. Anything for a little relief from the pain.

She told me I should take one a day for three days, then two a day for three days, then three a day, then four a day. When I ran out of pills, she said, she wouldn’t give me a refill, because I “wouldn’t need them anymore” by then.

At first I followed her instructions. But the pills absolutely wrecked me. I couldn’t think straight. I slept twelve hours a day. I couldn’t work. I couldn’t make food for myself. I felt like I was in a coma. I felt like I was dying. They did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for the pain. When I bumped it up to two pills a day as instructed I had to take sick leave from work because I was such a zombie. I laid in bed all day trying and failing to cry.

Finally I asked a pharmacist friend of mine online about the pills: pregabalin. Those are not for pain, he said. Those are for anxiety. They can be used to treat fibromyalgia - maybe your doctor read that and thought it meant they were a painkiller? I can’t imagine why a doctor would give you that for pain rather than a strong NSAID or a weak opioid like Tramadol.

Like Tramadol.

I explained that I’d asked for Tramadol and been denied because OPIOIDS ARE BAD. He ranted and raved, furious about how doctors refuse to prescribe one of the most useful painkillers in the world even to patients who really need them all because of a fear of addiction.

You know what’s addictive? He asked me. FUCKING PREGABALIN is addictive.

I described the course of medication the doctor had given me and he was even more horrified. FOUR PILLS A DAY and then STOPPING COLD TURKEY???? No weaning off of it? And the doctor had already told me I wouldn’t get a refill? The withdrawal effects from that would be HORRIFYING, he said. DO NOT FUCKING DO THAT.

I followed my friend’s instructions and immediately began to wean myself - GRADUALLY - off of the pregabalin. Even once I was off it, it was several weeks before I could sleep again. I was restless, anxious, paranoid, for weeks.

And through all of this, I was still in pain. Those pills did absolutely nothing for the pain.

And all of that could have been averted if the doctor had just... given me a prescription for a lower dose of Tramadol. (And I think it’s worth noting that what I was asking for was LESS OPIOIDS, not more. a LOWER dose than what I’d been given.)

some nurses I work with and get patients from give me the impression that they think a patient is opioid addicted and they need to be weaned off, and like even if that is the case 1) I'm not a addiction specialist, I'm their night nurse and their doctors have prescribed pain medication to be available to them, 2) day nurses I think can be more flippant about pain at times because during the day you have things that can distract you while at night, all you get to do is lie in bed and think about how much pain you're in, 3) I don't think a hospital stay for like heart failure is the best time to detox someone, 4) pain is incredibly subjective and I trust patients who've been living in their body for their whole lives more than I trust myself who has been talking to them about their body for five minutes, and 5) some nurses will be like "I don't offer pain medication unless the patient asks for it" and then the patient will ask for it and then it's all "this patient requested pain meds..... drug seeking behavior" like okay wtf are they supposed to do then? Stoically cry one tear down their cheek when I come to check on them so I can benevolently grant them 5 mg of oxy? 6) enduring pain doesn't make people better people, it actually makes people angry and tired and sad, so good luck building your therapeutic rapport while you make them beg for pain medication, maybe all your patients wouldn't be so mean to you if they weren't all suffering the entire time you're responsible for them, 7) if you aren't gonna give opioids and you're also not gonna page the doc for other meds and you're not gonna get ice packs and you're not gonna reposition your patient and you're not gonna ambulate them when they say that helps their hips and you're not gonna talk to them for a while to distract them and you're not gonna get them a jello cup to eat if they want, then literally how are you better than a little roomba with a med cup full of Lipitor scooting into their room?

I'm aware of the risks of opioids, I don't give them when it isn't safe or indicated, and I'm also aware that opioids aren't even good for all types of pain, but they can be an absolute gift to patients who need them. They aren't inherently evil. We don't have to make people suffer to improve their character. Even if suffering did that (it doesn't), improving character is outside my scope of practice. Here's some morphine.

[smoothserg]

This is Why Trump Almost Won the Election...Checkout the Revelations From Doctors To American Patients...

1. “But it’s sterile and I like the taste.”

“Nurse here. The number of people I’ve had to tell to not drink or to stop drinking their urine is surprising.” – Dakipa

2. Cleanliness is next to godliness.

“You’re 22 – wash your dick.” – Nickrosis

3. Did you not learn this in 6th grade?

4. Secondhand idiocy.

“Yes, you smoking in your house is likely making your kid’s asthma worse.” – BruteSquad610

5. Where do I even start?

“A couple instances come to mind.

1) Don’t have sex 6 hours after you delivered a baby.

2) Coffee creamer is not the same as infant formula. Please do not feed your day old newborn International Delight.

3) Probiotics are different from antibiotics. Probiotics do not cure syphilis. – Kaclassen

6. Sometimes, listen to the patients.

“I know you are trying to help but you don’t do CPR on someone who is actively telling you to stop between compressions.” – Cl1mb3r

7. Don’t try this at home kids.

“Jumping from a first floor balcony onto an alfresco dining shade umbrella below will not make you bounce up and down like you are on a trampoline. Instead your 100kg body will simply crash through the fabric onto the footpath below and break both your arms. You will not impress the ladies with this, like you originally intended – and besides, what exactly is a semi-obese man in his forties still doing trying to impress women like that?

(What I actually said to him, which encapsulated all of the above, was ”what part of you thought it was a good idea?”, followed by ”and remind me how old you are again?”).” – OkeyDoke47

8. It’s an ultrasound, not a crystal ball.

“No. I cannot tell the race of your baby on ultrasound. You’ll have to wait until birth to have an awkward conversation with one of your boyfriends.” – sutherbb36

9. Not so fast, are you?

“I was waiting to get my colonoscopy done a couple of years ago and they were asking the lady in the next station if she’d fasted. They went through all the questions and double-checked that she had fasted, then after confirming, almost as an aside she throws in that she had oatmeal for breakfast that morning.

Nurse: Ma’am, fasting means you can’t eat anything before the exam.

Lady: I know. But I always have oatmeal for breakfast.

Nurse: I understand. But you can’t eat before this exam. The doctor has to look at your digestive system.

Lady: But oatmeal is good for digestion.

Nurse: You can’t eat anything before this exam. You have to have completely fasted so he can look at your intestines.

Lady: But I always have oatmeal for breakfast.” – PerilousAli

11. Where do I begin?

“Primary Care Doc here, here’s a few of my favorite things I’ve had to tell patients

Please leave your marijuana/pipe/joint/paraphernalia in your vehicle or at home; don’t bring it to your appointment

You don’t need to bring a hunting knife to your appointment.

No I can’t write you a letter saying your rabbit is a service animal so you can fly it around the country with you for free.

Showing up drunk to an 8am appointment and asking me to prescribe you Xanax doesn’t get you Xanax

I am not qualified to tell you how much masturbation is too much masturbation.

It is not my job to teach your adolescent son about how to get a girlfriend.

Your medicine only works when you take it.

I’m not going to give you my cell phone number

Women are doctors too

No I can’t just remove your gallbladder in the office; I’m also not a surgeon.

You shouldn’t be taking your friend’s/mom’s/grandma’s medication.

You can’t just ‘pull your panties to the side’ for a Pap smear

….and the list goes on and on” – AboveAverageAMA

14. Do you not wipe?

“Old friend of mine is a Nurse Practitioner. She told me she once saw a patient, male, complaining of severe rectal itching and general pain.

She is a very smart people-person, she can read people very well. She got right to the point and asked him about his daily hygiene routine. She had a hunch based off his presentation that he was a “man’s man”…”aint go gay stuff happening here!!!”

Long story short, when showering, he NEVER cleaned his ass. Ever. He told her, that it was “homosexual” to touch his anus.

She had to explain to him that the severe rash and itching he had been dealing with for apparently YEARS was a direct result of his perceived “homo acts.”

She instructed him to go home, take a proper shower, and apply witch hazel for a few days.

Amazing that a grown man thinks this way.” – IT_Chef

16. Maybe that’s why they’re, you know, crying.

“Yes, your babies need to be fed through the night. They are not born eating three meals a day and sleeping 10 hours a night. Please, dear God, wake up and feed them.” – kyelmo

17. Eww.

“I am a clinical lab scientist, and I frequently have to tell patients that I cannot accept their stool samples in tupperware, mugs, food to-go boxes, etc. The worst is when they take the shit-filled mug back home with them cause they don’t want to lose a ‘perfectly good mug.'” – lalalashucks

18. Meth, not even once.

“Usually goes along with after a car accident and their kids weren’t in car seats/seatbelts, how their kids… NEED TO BE IN FUCKING CAR SEATS… But it’s summer so a more seasonal example is the following:

Me- “So whats the problem today?”

Them- “I don’t know what’s going on! I can’t breath! I’m having a seizure!”

Me- “Hmmm.. has this ever happened before?

T- “Yea usually when I smoke crystal meth”

Me- “Did you smoke crystal meth today?”

T- “Yea, like 30 min ago. Why?”

Me- “….” – IronicNihilist

19. So much for the food pyramid.

“This conversation happened once.

Me: Also, you need to eat more fiber.

Guy: Okay, sure.

Me: That means more vegetable during meals. And you can have fruits for dessert.

Guy: Urgh… But I don’t like vegetables.

Me: Yeah, but you gotta eat more of them now.

Guy: No, I don’t eat vegetables.

Me: What do you mean?

Guy: I never eat vegetables. Like, since I was a kid. Never.

Me: Why?

Guy: I don’t like how it tastes.

Me: …..

The guy was in his 30s, severely obese with lots of pimples on his face. His cholesterol was through the roof. And he was having problem with his colon health. He was there with his wife and two kids, too.” – SphmrSlmp

20. Stop wasting my time.

“No, belly button lint is not a reason to go to the emergency room via ambulance.” – stayathmdad

21.

Me: “Did you miss a dose of [insert medicine name here]?” Pt: “No, I take it every day”. Me: “How many times did you not take [previously named medicine] in the past week?” Pt: “Three and I skipped this morning too”.

This happens probably once a week.” – RepublicansRInbreds

22.

“Patient had been referred to my pharmacy by his physician for an OTC enema. The guy was not the sharpest tack, and apparently either his physician did not explain it well or the guy didn’t listen, but our conversation went like this:

Pt.: So I drink down this whole bottle and then I’ll hafta shit?

Me: No sir, this is an enema. It is used rectally.

Pt. (confused): So what’s that mean, I don’t hafta drink the whole thing?

Me: No sir, you’ll lie on your side and insert the applicator tip of the bottle into your rectum and squeeze the contents into you bowel. You’ll then remain lying on your side and hold the enema in until you feel the urge to have a bowel movement.

Pt.: You tellin’ me I gotta stick it up my ass!?

Me: Yes sir, this is an enema and it is used rectally. There are detailed instructions and diagrams in the box.

Pt.: FUCK YOU!

And he stormed off. That was the last I saw of him. Not sure if he thought I was messing with him or what, but I hope he eventually got to shit.” – IbuBROfen

26.

No, your teenaged daughters cannot share a single prescription for birth control pills. — MisplacedApostophie

30. “Worked in women’s health……so many things but one that always makes me shake my head is a woman telling me that her doctor said if she pees after sex she won’t get pregnant. I had to explain to a grown ass woman who had already given birth three times that your urethra and your cervix are two different holes and peeing after intercourse can help prevent UTIs but not pregnancy. Learn about your body ladies, no one else is going to teach you.” – reddoesntcare

32. You should not be allowed to have sex.

[das-leben-nach-dem-tod]

Trends With Quick Plans In Stevia Sweetened Iso Xp

A Click Away From Choosing Root Aspects For New Zealand Whey Protein Canada

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For the original version including any supplementary images or video, visit https://www.fool.com.au/2018/02/22/why-blackmores-limited-is-crashing-despite-posting-a-20-profit-growth/

Great Advice And Ideas About Fitness That Anyone Can Grasp

It can be very difficult to find straightforward, easy-to-understand online advice about fitness programs. With so much information available, you may feel as if you are spending all your time searching for information, with no time left to actually get in shape. Luckily, the very best tips are in this article, and you can read them below. Implement an workout routine that you will have no problem sticking too. You will anticipate your workouts since they are fun for you. You will want to be sure you aren't spending any longer than an hour to lift weights. Not only that, but muscle wasting starts at around an hour during this type of exercise. Keep your weight lifting regime under an hour. Wall sits are fast and simple ways on which you can build leg strength. All you need to perform this move is a flat, empty wall. Face away from the wall, and stand roughly eighteen inches from it. Slowly bend at the knees until your back is resting against the wall. Make sure that you keep bending your knees until you are in the sitting position and you thighs become parallel to the floor. Maintain this position until you can't take it any more. Your bicycling pace should be kept between 80 and 110 rpm. This pace will let you ride farther, faster, and will result in less fatigue and strain on your knees. To determine your pace, count how many times your left leg comes towards the handlebars in 10 seconds, the multiply this value by 6. You should try to keep this rpm. If you want to exercise do not think of it in this way, have fun with it. If you think of it as a daunting task you will loathe it and be less motivated. One way to eliminate this word from your vocabulary is to call any workout that you are going to do by it's actual name, like biking. Do not work out if you are ill. Your body needs the full use of all of its resources for the healing process when you're ill. Your body can't effectively build muscle and fight off an illness at the same time. Wait until you are feeling better before you begin to exercise again. To speed your recovery, eat properly and get sufficient sleep at night. Make sure to schedule exercise into your day around the meals that you eat. If you are busy at lunchtime, you may end up choosing something unhealthy, like fast food or snacks from a vending machine. By determining what your schedule is going to be first, you can prepare healthy snacks and meals to take with you, and you can plan out the times you will workout. As discussed at the beginning of this article, getting the best information, and applying it to your own fitness goals, is not the most simple task. Keeping yourself educated, however, is one of the key parts of reaching your goals. Use the tips you learned here, and success will come easy.

An Insightful Analysis On Straightforward Products Of Canada

Uproar in Canada after homeopath gives boy pill made from rabid dog's saliva Homeopathic remedy allegedly cured behaviour problem Critics seek review of system for approving homeopathic treatments Last modified on Fri 20 Apr 2018 17.16 EDT Anke Zimmerman, the naturopath, said: ‘What does it matter what it’s made of, dog saliva, elephant’s dung or badger’s pubic hair, it’s so diluted that it’s only water after all, or a placebo, a sugar pill.’Photograph: Alamy The Canadian government’s system of approving homeopathic treatments has been challenged after a naturopath in the province of British Columbia claimed to have treated a four-year-old’s behavioural problems with a remedy made from the saliva of a rabid dog. Anke Zimmerman said she had used the product to treat a preschooler named Jonah who had been having trouble sleeping and had been aggressive and violent towards his peers. “His school is complaining that he hides under tables and growls at people,” she wrote on her blog. She suspected the child’s issues stemmed from a previous dog bite. “This child presented a perfect picture of the rabies state,” she wrote. Drawing on her more than two decades of experience, she gave him two pellets of lyssinum, which claimed to contain the infected saliva, made by a pharmacy in the UK and which is approved by Health Canada . The naturopath whistleblower: ‘It is surprisingly easy to sell snake oil’ “Within a minute or two of giving him Whey Protein the remedy Jonah smiled at me very broadly and beautifully, as if all the lights had just gone on,” Zimmerman wrote. His mother later reported considerable improvements, she added. Her claim has prompted questions about why the treatment – known as lyssin, lyssinum or hydrophobinum – was approved for use in Canada. This week, the top health official in British Columbia, Dr Bonnie Henry, urged Health Canada to review its decision, over concerns that the product could put patients at risk of contracting rabies. “There’s no way I can understand why we would have anything that was meant to be saliva of a rabid dog approved for use in this country,” Henry told the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation.

For the original version including any supplementary images or video, visit https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/apr/20/canada-homeopathy-rabid-dog-saliva-pill-boy

Get Healthy With These Expert Vitamin Tips

A great way to ensure you are maintaining vitamin levels is by taking a daily supplement. There is so much to choose from that it can feel overwhelming. Learn how to simply the process here. Take vitamins to have a healthier body. When you are well nourished, your body can recover quickly from workouts, burn fat and build muscle more efficiently. Vitamins and minerals need to be synthesized if your body wants to use them, so you need to know about any potential reactions. Iron is absorbed well with Vitamin C, but its absorption is inhibited by calcium. This means avoiding dairy within a half hour of an iron supplement, and you should avoid calcium and antacids during this time as well. Supplements with fats should always be taken with some food. Several vitamins, including E, K, and A are best absorbed by your body when taken with a meal. These fat soluble vitamins need fat to be properly absorbed. One of the most important things for healthy red blood cell production is having adequate iron levels. These are the cells which get oxygen from place to place. Men do not require as much iron as women do, which is why most supplements are made for women. You may have an iron deficiency if you have been experiencing breathing issues or exhaustion. We may want to eat as healthy as we can but it's hard on a budget. Minerals and vitamins are a great way to ensure your body is getting what it needs. They are also budget friendly for the most part. These days, taking supplements to get vitamins and minerals is more important than ever. Processed foods just don't offer us what we need. Taking a good, natural multivitamin will replace what your food might be lacking. Citrus fruits and some veggies are very high in Vitamin C. Supplements are a good choice if you don't get enough of this vitamin. Vitamin C is known to reduce the risk of catching colds, as well as speeding up the recovery time when one is sick. In addition, some studies have shown that vitamin C can aid those suffering from ADHD, Alzheimers disease, and dementia. Talk to your doctor about any nutrient deficiencies. This is an issue that should provide a basis for your supplements, so you need to know the ones you need as soon as possible. Use caution when it comes to supplements. Vitamins and minerals are great for your body, but you can overdose. This can be extremely dangerous. Make sure that you talk to your doctor about the right doses. A lot of OTC medications and prescriptions have nasty side effects when combined with certain supplements. Some reactions can be fatal. Make sure you always tell your doctor about any supplements you take on a daily basis. Ask your pharmacist if you have any concerns about an over-the-counter medication. B12 absorption varies from person to person. You can try taking a lot of it, but this doesn't mean all of it will get absorbed. It is good to be tested to make sure your vitamin B12 levels are good. If they are not, you can get shots. Eat raw vegetables with your meats at night. Vitamins are depleted through many styles of cooking. Many recommend steaming vegetables because this method doesn't deplete vitamins as quickly as other cooking styles. Vegetables that have been frozen are still ideal as long as they aren't overcooked. Even though you may not always spend time at the gym or eat like a dietician, you should still take the initiative to live a healthy lifestyle. You can make a difference in regards to your health by taking vitamins and minerals. It's important to choose a supplement that will help you make up for the nutrients that your diet does not provide.

[fourteentallies]

How to get my dad to stop hating me??? All he ever does is take out his anger issues on me, talk shit about my mom to me, and smoke pot. It's very hard to live in a house where I never feel like I can relax. I'm constantly on edge because I'm always scared of doing something wrong, because I'm always told I am. I'm very sick of being treated like a bad kid. The only things I lie about are for my own safety, I don't smoke/ do drugs, or drink, I'm never out late, I have very good grades. Like the other day my dad was in my room and he found a pill on my floor (it was a Melatonin which is and OTC sleep aid, which he bought for me) and he got noticeably mad and accusatory and was like "What is this?!" And I just?? Put it back in the bottle... because I apparently have a Dad who thinks I pop pills?? Gee thanks Yet I'm always treated like I'm such a bad kid? It's either my sad accusing me of like conspiring against him or him guilting me about being his youngest kid about to graduate. Low key wish my mom and him would just get a divorce already. My dad thinks he's being some hero by not asking for one but my guy if you're that unhappy where you've be whining and bitching about her for like a year, it's not her fault you're unhappy. Just leave?? Like I know easier said but come on. It's so inappropriate for him to be constantly talking shit about her. It's none of my business!! Why does it need to involve me! Like I can tell she tries to keep things from me regarding everything, but I'm just the child, I'm not in the damn relationship. Especially when she specifically tells him to keep it between them, do not involve me. It's almost as bad as them using me to get to each other. I hate it so much. Just even the one time I was like "I think this is really inappropriate and this makes me very uncomfortable" he used my fucking mental illness against me and was like "I'm just fucking venting you should know the value of coping skills" and got really mad. The worst thing he ever said to me like that was when something came up and he was telling me every detail of an argument with my mom and there was a situation where she brought up how when my sister moved out she very rudely made a mess that took me 2-3 days to clean up and he was like "She just always has something against your sister it's not like I didn't have to clean up all of your vomit that one time." Wanna know what he was talking about? (TW) My fucking suicide attempt. That's not something you can just throw in someone face. What the fuck. Yeah I fucking overdosed and slit my wrist and I passed out and puked up all the pills and was in the hospital for a week. I woke up and I still couldn't stop vomiting but he refused to take me to the emergency room. It was too the point where I was vomiting stomach acid. That's not something nearly on the same tier.... at all.... of my sister making a point to leave her room destroyed so I or my mom would have to clean it up just to be disrespectful. It was the rudest thing. Tell me how that even fucking compares. At all. Aaaaaaaaaaaah. At least when I talk shit about my dad with my mom she's like I feel really bad talking about your father but like we're using it to relate because we're both sick of him? Don't get me wrong, my mom can be straight up abusive sometimes and it's not pretty, but when my mom gets mad she lectures, when my dad gets mad he screams and punches things. Kids are supposed to me scared of getting lectures from there parents, not being scared of being attacked or screamed at if I can't find his keys when he's lost something or another minimal thing like that. I've been waiting around all week for my dad to talk to me because he keeps being like "you and I need to talk" but not talking to me and yesterday he came in my room and was like "you and I need to come to an agreement by the end of the week" like what does that mean??? Could you just add like "about your mom" or something to the end of that sentence so I'm not having a panic attack all week because I'm scared to talk to you?? Of course not. It's I considerate and just fucking stupid. Be straight up with me. If you're trying to raise me to be responsible and honest, respect me enough to not lead me on for a week when you know I have anxiety. Or maybe we're just ignoring that since you're too lazy to fucking get my prescriptions filled, and I have to abruptly come off of 3 medications for my depression, anxiety, and panic disorder to where I had to miss a week of school because I was dissociating like hell and couldn't eat. They thought I had the flu. But I know if I even brought that up, 2 things would happen. 1: he would get all fake sad and pretend to care but never actually do anything real about it to avoid talking to my mom 2: get mad at me when I cry and tell me I'm too old to not be able to have a mature conversation (not to mention the only reason I cry is because it's when I talk to YOU because you've traumatized me) There's only two parts of my depression other people see. One is me trying to maturely talk about it (from a very young age this frightened one doctor who thought I wasn't sad enough about trying to kill myself and accused me of being a sociopath) and people not taking me seriously which leads to part two which is me being numb and crying about every little detail and people being shocked once they've flushed me to this point. I just already don't want to be living and living here is 10x worse than living with depression.

[invisiblefoxfire]

PERSONAL ANECDOTE TIME

Several months after major surgery I was still having a lot of pain. OTC painkillers did nothing. The pain was severe enough that I couldn’t sleep. So I went to my doctor and said, after the surgery I was given Tramadol, and it was the only thing that helped with this pain. But they only gave me slow-release Tramadol that came in high doses (100 mg tablets that lasted all day) and I didn’t want to have that much in my system. I still had most of the tablets, months later, because I just didn’t like being doped up all day. I showed my doctor the unused pills so she could see that I wasn’t addicted or anything, I am capable of using them in moderation. I asked: could I get a lower dose of Tramadol, just to use now and then on really bad days? I’d only take it maybe a couple of times a week, when it was really bad. So I could get a little sleep.

And her answer?

ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT (I’m paraphrasing). Tramadol is an OPIOID. Those are BAD and DANGEROUS and ADDICTIVE and have SIDE EFFECTS.

So what should I do? I asked. I can’t sleep. I’m in pain all the time. I can’t live like this. I’m depressed because I’m in pain all the time. Life doesn’t feel worth living if it feels like this. I just want something to relieve the pain every now and then. Please help me.

Well normally we don’t do anything about this kind of pain. [pause for me to try to hold back tears] Well, I can understand that must be disappointing for you.

Finally she agreed to give me something. Something that is “specifically for nerve pain”, she called it. I’d never heard of it. I said I’d try anything. Anything for a little relief from the pain.

She told me I should take one a day for three days, then two a day for three days, then three a day, then four a day. When I ran out of pills, she said, she wouldn’t give me a refill, because I “wouldn’t need them anymore” by then.

At first I followed her instructions. But the pills absolutely wrecked me. I couldn’t think straight. I slept twelve hours a day. I couldn’t work. I couldn’t make food for myself. I felt like I was in a coma. I felt like I was dying. They did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for the pain. When I bumped it up to two pills a day as instructed I had to take sick leave from work because I was such a zombie. I laid in bed all day trying and failing to cry.

Finally I asked a pharmacist friend of mine online about the pills: pregabalin. Those are not for pain, he said. Those are for anxiety. They can be used to treat fibromyalgia - maybe your doctor read that and thought it meant they were a painkiller? I can’t imagine why a doctor would give you that for pain rather than a strong NSAID or a weak opioid like Tramadol.

Like Tramadol.

I explained that I’d asked for Tramadol and been denied because OPIOIDS ARE BAD. He ranted and raved, furious about how doctors refuse to prescribe one of the most useful painkillers in the world even to patients who really need them all because of a fear of addiction.

You know what’s addictive? He asked me. FUCKING PREGABALIN is addictive.

I described the course of medication the doctor had given me and he was even more horrified. FOUR PILLS A DAY and then STOPPING COLD TURKEY???? No weaning off of it? And the doctor had already told me I wouldn’t get a refill? The withdrawal effects from that would be HORRIFYING, he said. DO NOT FUCKING DO THAT.

I followed my friend’s instructions and immediately began to wean myself - GRADUALLY - off of the pregabalin. Even once I was off it, it was several weeks before I could sleep again. I was restless, anxious, paranoid, for weeks.

And through all of this, I was still in pain. Those pills did absolutely nothing for the pain.

And all of that could have been averted if the doctor had just... given me a prescription for a lower dose of Tramadol. (And I think it’s worth noting that what I was asking for was LESS OPIOIDS, not more. a LOWER dose than what I’d been given.)

some nurses I work with and get patients from give me the impression that they think a patient is opioid addicted and they need to be weaned off, and like even if that is the case 1) I'm not a addiction specialist, I'm their night nurse and their doctors have prescribed pain medication to be available to them, 2) day nurses I think can be more flippant about pain at times because during the day you have things that can distract you while at night, all you get to do is lie in bed and think about how much pain you're in, 3) I don't think a hospital stay for like heart failure is the best time to detox someone, 4) pain is incredibly subjective and I trust patients who've been living in their body for their whole lives more than I trust myself who has been talking to them about their body for five minutes, and 5) some nurses will be like "I don't offer pain medication unless the patient asks for it" and then the patient will ask for it and then it's all "this patient requested pain meds..... drug seeking behavior" like okay wtf are they supposed to do then? Stoically cry one tear down their cheek when I come to check on them so I can benevolently grant them 5 mg of oxy? 6) enduring pain doesn't make people better people, it actually makes people angry and tired and sad, so good luck building your therapeutic rapport while you make them beg for pain medication, maybe all your patients wouldn't be so mean to you if they weren't all suffering the entire time you're responsible for them, 7) if you aren't gonna give opioids and you're also not gonna page the doc for other meds and you're not gonna get ice packs and you're not gonna reposition your patient and you're not gonna ambulate them when they say that helps their hips and you're not gonna talk to them for a while to distract them and you're not gonna get them a jello cup to eat if they want, then literally how are you better than a little roomba with a med cup full of Lipitor scooting into their room?

I'm aware of the risks of opioids, I don't give them when it isn't safe or indicated, and I'm also aware that opioids aren't even good for all types of pain, but they can be an absolute gift to patients who need them. They aren't inherently evil. We don't have to make people suffer to improve their character. Even if suffering did that (it doesn't), improving character is outside my scope of practice. Here's some morphine.