#and please do not try to defend rick

[invest-yourlife]

i feel legitimately angry about the pjo tv show. rick makes a huge show of how book accurate it’s going to be and then gives us that? he exploited the trust his fans had in him and our love for this series and we got something that only vaguely resembles the story we know. sure, it was never going to be a verbatim retelling, but you’re telling me the series we got is “book accurate”? i just don’t understand what happened between the huge campaign that happened to get disney to develop a good adaptation of the story to now.

[whtepony]

Lowkey what if Rickbot was being all romantic and fucking reader in place of Rick and he just happens to walk in?

like you mean it. ✮ rick sanchez

ft. rick c-137 x fem reader, rickbot x fem reader

warnings: nsfw under the cut so 18+, rick being mean to you and rickbot lol, implied cucking, maybe slightly ooc rick, not proofread

notes: I READ A FIC LIKE THIS ONCE!!!! i cannot find it for the life of me but if anyone knows where it is PLEASE lmk. it was great. this turned out kinda bad but i hope u enjoy!!

“you always look so good like this, so- so pretty, why don’t i tell you that more often?” rick mumbled against your skin, sounding almost like he was cursing himself for his behavior. “always so- always so good to me, should give you my attention like this every- every day, huh?” he said with a smile, kissing the soft skin of your shaky thigh. “so good- taste even better, though.”

you laughed, panting from your all-too-recent second orgasm. rick had almost begged you to let him settle between your thighs after you’d had a particularly long day - a more than welcome gesture, one which would’ve seemed out of place only a couple months ago. it’s not that rick wasn’t a giver when you had sex, not by any means, he just usually wasn’t one to make the effort to help you relax. and you’d gotten used to that.

he’d changed recently, and it was almost too good to be real. the first few days, you were unsettled by his sudden niceness. of course, he tended to be slightly nicer to you than to the others around him, but you knew rick better than most others anyway, and it was unusual for him to be so selfless. he seemed to be more genuine when he spoke. he cut back on his ‘errands’, opting to spend more time at home. he went three full days without sending a single jab at jerry, and that alone made you think he’d lost it. morty thought the same, side-eyeing his grandpa when he said something or another that usually would be followed by a punchline. but slowly, you all started to get more comfortable with the ‘new’ rick, even if you wondered where he came from.

rick’s long fingers trailed up your sides, his cold fingertips snapping you out of your thoughts. “y-you okay, sweetie?” he asked, positioning himself above you. you nodded with a smile, trying to even out your breathing. “mhm, i’m great, actually.” he grinned back, leaning down to kiss you when the hatch in the garage floor slammed open. you all but jumped out of your skin, scrambling to cover yourself under the assumption summer or morty had walked in on you.

“you’ve been fucking her? did- did you forget i can see what the fuck you’re doing whenever i want to?”

you sat up slowly on the little couch that’d been recently moved into the garage, covering your body with rick’s discarded lab coat. you looked between the rick next to you and the rick climbing out of the floor, trying to piece together the situation. “you dumb fucking robot, you had one job-“

“hey, my job was to be a better you!” the rick next to you said defensively, starting to put an arm around you. you swatted it away, scooting away from him as you realized what had happened. “are you fucking kidding, rick? how long has- where have you been?” you asked incredulously, shooting a glare at the more disheveled version of your boyfriend. he all but ignored you, coming closer to the- rickbot?- as he continued to berate it.

“are you kidding? you think that- that because you’re up here and i’m not, you can get away with touching her like that?” rick laughed in disbelief, leaning over rickbot. any other time, you’d be proud of the way he was trying to defend you, and honestly more than a little turned on. rickbot stared up at his maker, opening his mouth to argue back when you interjected. “you can’t even be mad, rick, at least he fucks me like he means it!”

rick stopped, scoffing as he turned to you. “well, you’ve never complained before, huh? y-you never have any criticism when i make you cum so hard you cry, do you?” you shut your mouth, uncertain how to respond. his words embarrassed you, even more so knowing they were true- rick never gave you any reason to complain. you just wanted to hurt him back. “you got some more smart shit you wanna throw at me? go right- go right ahead, we’re all fucking waiting.” you couldn’t respond, tears starting to prick at your eyes. it was all too much. rickbot reached over to rub your bare shoulder, a pained look on his face as the sight of your reaction. rick slapped his hand away, glaring at him as he pushed rickbot to the ground next to the couch and settled in his spot. rick pulled you closer to him by your ankles, exposing you to him as your back fell against the couch cushions.

“h-hey!” you cried out, glancing down at rickbot before you looked back up at rick. “you- you can’t treat him that way!” you protested, despite the way your skin burned with desire where rick’s hands gripped you. his grip was almost bruising and you could tell by the look in his eyes that he was jealous, and it was bad. you might’ve fucked up. “oh, can’t i, though? c-come on, baby-“ he purred, pushing your legs up further as he leaned between them.

“let him watch while i fuck you like i mean it.”

[ganeshpnf]

Thinking about Wrath of the triple goddess again and I just saw the interview Rick made and-

He openly says that he is mixing up two canons together, how he gets inspired by the "actors" and their dynamics. I read @lilislegacy 's criticism again and I just dont know how would we handle new books if he just keeps doing it. Because we saw the results, we saw how ooc characters become, we saw how it felt like Rick didnt read his own books for years and actually this is funny:

Just read your own books...And like, missing every detail even big ones or the ones we kept in our hearts for years(Annabeth's lemon shampoo...) is gone! Like what are you on?

This is why I always believe, if you make an adaptation, keep them separate from the canon material, in this case, books. It is hurting the both of them. Also this is the reason I personally dont like any mixing in the arts or in fanfics. I respect who does or prefer, but for me, universes need to stay separate or we have this situation in our hands.

Show and the books are so so so different, they deserve to be their own things. Show deserves to have its own canon, own events, actors need to have their own development. While books should stay books and book characters should stay book characters. Like please, book characters and show characters are different. We cant pretend the otherwise, we just cant. You cant tell me Walker is exactly book Percy, Leah is book Annabeth or Aryan is book Grover. They are all amazing, yes. We should support them, also yes. But pretending they are the book characters, that they are the exact same is just a big no.

Rick trying to write the actors' dynamics into the new books felt so ooc! And anyone who is hyping "Oh he imagining them as he writes", you cant see how ooc they were? And someone should tell Rick that. I dont know how to reach that man, he loves keeping himself away from the fans. But someone gotta let him know because the new books feels nothing but cash grabs. Amount of typo mistakes, ooc characters, all the stupid advertasing for the S2. So so cringe :(

I really dont want new book to be the same and I really dont know what to do *sigh* It hurts to see the man, who I admired for my whole childhood, getting so so much hate from the fans, but it is getting so hard to defend him, he is turning to JK.Rowling and it is creepy :(

[deansapplepie]

Imagine you’re afraid of holding guns, so Daryl finds a way you can protect yourself

Warnings: (normally there’s no warnings on my imagines but here it goes) guns, how destructive they can be, mentions of attempt of Suicide with guns, I think that’s it and Daryl might be ooc. Probably worst thing I wrote.

Right at the beginning of the outbreak you found the Quarry so you got protection from the group, you never needed to protect yourself until you didn’t had the protection of the quarry anymore.

When the group arrived at the farm and it was decided everyone was going to learn how to shoot it made you anxious, you didn’t want to hold a gun. You had always disliked guns. Your dad was a cop and you always feared guns so much, he asked for you ti move a gun from a place to the other? You just couldn’t. You saw on TV all the time how guns were destructive, how people ended up killing others by accident or worst how people could go crazy having something so powerful on their hands. Besides that, your parents threatened using it to take their own lives sometimes. You hated guns. You hated having them around back home. You hated having them here, even if they guaranteed your safety. You just couldn’t touch one.

You heard a lot from Shane when you refused to go training, you didn’t want to. Your heard terrible things from him, about how you wouldn’t have people to protect you forever and how you would end up dead. He just stopped when Rick intervened. You were shaking out of anxiety and fear.

Hadn’t Daryl been injured from his searches for Sophia he’d had intervenes to. He did believe you all should learn how to protect yourselves, but he also saw what happened to you wasn’t just some excuse it was real. He couldn’t dent he had a soft spot for you, you were always yourself and you always treated everyone fairly. When the group left, leaving you behind he approached you.

“Do ya wanna learn how to defend yourself?” He startled you from the turmoil you were stuck in your mind.

“Uh… yeah. But not with guns.” You answered, still a little defensive.

“I can help ya using a knife, when I get better I can try to teach ya crossbow and a little fight.”

“Would you?” Your whole demeanor changed and you finally looked at him.

He averted your eyes, you looked so cute and so much better than you looked before when you were afraid and anxious. “Yes, ya need to protect yourself and if you can’t hold a gun it’s ok.”

“Thank you, Daryl!” You said and before he could have any reaction you kissed his cheek, your still trembling hand touching his face slightly.

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[trips2saturn]

looking back on episode one, the moment that rick and michonne reunite during her kicking his ass, you could see rick physically give up after trying to defend himself once. his body language is so exhausted and lackadaisical and michonne just tugs him upwards by his collar and he just lets her do so! still being unknown to the fact that he was in the loving hands of his wife (despite the minor wwe smackdown). that scene alone just laid out the foundation for rick’s internal damage and distress from all of the trauma that has built up over the years of being apart from his wife and family. there’s so many fucking layers to this series y’all. sooo many layers to HIM. my poor sugar plum pookie bear 😣 please get him and his wife home safely, this man is on the brink of complete disaster!!!!!!!

[rickandmortyrealitytraveller]

A long Evil Morty analysis yap and poll 🙌

Quote >“Evil Morty is a great character because he seems reasonable on the surface, even heroic.

He's not wrong about Ricks being abusive, and he deserves the chance to escape. But he also had no problem torturing and murdering countless Mortys along the way. He doesn't help any of them escape THEIR Ricks, either--he just gets in his ship and leaves with their blood on his hands.

Much as he acts like a champion for Mortys, he doesn't seem to see them as people. In fact, he might think that he's the only Morty worth saving.” - @thesoftboiledegg

✨Spoilers for Rick and Morty forewarning✨

These are just my thoughts on this. Also let me know if you agree, or if I am just bending over backwards defending Evil Morty.

Alright ket me start. No he doesn't see past other versions of himself like they aren't people, I think that he just really hates his counterparts for clinging onto Rick. He probably thinks he's the only one actually seeing Rick's for what they are, not having that forgiveness that Morty's are known for. The only one actively trying to leave/ have left (Depending on what part of the show you're at). Instead of him thinking he's "the only Morty worth saving" it's more like he was the only one actually trying to save himself, while having to watch all of the other versions of himself purposefully attached themselves to what they need saving from. (Also definitely not saying that it's the Morty's that were abused fault, just a point from his perspective.)

And all the Morty's he's killed were close or clinging onto a rick, they are actively choosing to allow themselves to have a toxic attachment to a Rick in his mind. It's not his responsibility to help those Morty's, so them dying was just going to happen anyway at the hands of Rick's. It's not like he was changing anything. Speeding it up? Sure. But most of them are helping speed it up too anyway by, by staying by his side.

Both of the points I just said shown in this gif right here^ That sure is killing a Fuck ton of Morty’s, but look at the curve. The curve Evil Morty displayed is showing even more Rick’s killing and abusing Morty’s. And Evil Morty purposely only displayed the really very horrific things happening in the curve that was all Rick’s collective doing, and it’s being shown over Evil Morty’s own horrific act. But Evil Morty’s was confined to the citadel, while Rick’s was across an uncountable number of realities.

I also think that's why he offered Morty prime to come along with him when he was leaving, because our Morty we are following in the show has a backbone. He stands up to his Rick C-137. Because I believe that he was lying about not having room for him after he said no, I do think that there was a toilet back there but he still would have let him sit on it to come with him. (Please I'm not delusional I swear he wanted him to go with him 😭🙏) Not saying that all Morty's are spineless, or that him killing all those Morty's was the best outcome. (Rest in peace to all those innocent Morty's 🙁)

Evil Morty doesn't really do anything without thought, and all his thoughts were on one thing. Leaving. So if he wanted to be a champion for Morty's he would be one, but he doesn't, he was just pointing out the cruelty of the way the central finite curve is at most Rick's design before he left for good. He wasn't trying to be some hero with his speech right before he left, he was just saying back what he's been knowing the whole time he was following through with his plan.

[degenrcy]

fallen angel -> daryl dixon/teen!reader

oh hell yeah. buckle in for this one. anime is for losers, this is grown man shit now.

warnings for THIS chapter: underage drinking, that's really it, can u believe it. also so painfully obvious you have a crush on daryl. NOT very canon as you will see, but not too far off.

intended to be a dark fic but not in the usual way.. kinda slow burn, very self indulgent, very in the works. please leave some comments or (careful) criticisms, im worried this will read off really bad haha

you were the kid of the group, even with a baby on the way and with carl practicing gun twirls like a cowboy where he thinks no one can see. you were actually friends with beth before all of this- in the same grade, on track to graduate together- older than the children by years. mentally behind everyone else, it seemed.

you were shy and quiet with most people, they saw you as scared. you made yourself small and avoided adult things. beth, on the other hand, was always begging to go out with maggie and always insisting her vote mattered just as much in group decisions… you, however… nothing much made sense anymore, and while everyone else was busy trying to survive and move forward, you stayed quiet and distant. you’d ask beth to ask glenn and maggie for little things on their runs, but only if she made sure to make it seem like it wasn’t you asking, but her. people who have saved you and had your back for a while now, and yet you still haven’t warmed all the way up.

rick and carol knew everything: the dead parents, the broken ankle running to hershel’s farm that fateful day of the fall, the girl beth used to know, and the one she tries to convince the others you are. everyone else kinda got the gist about you and your situation, not like there’s room for judgment anymore. you still appreciated everything they did for you; they included you, didn’t shun you away. beth and her family took you in from the rain with sleeves soaked in blood and have been with you in ever since. you are painfully aware of your place- the extra spot being taken up, a burden, a coward who’s too weak to fight back or defend her ‘people’. they told you it was fine, people need to stick together and take care of eachother, with a pinch on your cheek or ruffle of your hair. they naturally treated you like a naive, dumb child, that must’ve meant you were one.

it was even harder when new people intruded the house- even if hershel allowed it after a while. you finally got use to the idea of this being your forever. then, you lost it all. an ungodly amount of walkers, seeing the sight of fire and the dead could make anyone religious. you sobbed in the car during the escape and were inconsolable, the real owners- beth’s family- of the farm house didn’t seem to grasp your grief. this wasn’t your house, your land. but you weren’t ready for anything outside of the bubble you’ve been in with your best friend and her loving family this whole time. what felt like a forever camping trip, trekking through rain and mud and damn near mountains trying to find a new place was your version of hell. this was disgusting, horrible, tiring, exhausting, and sad. it made you so, so sad and miserable.

“this can’t be everyday, y/n. we’re all in the same shitty spot, no point crying about it anymore.” carol tried to give you the tough love route and carressed your head, your face glistening with tears as she sushed you. there was an ever-deepening void in you, and little hope it would ever be filled.

beth and maggie sometimes sang for everyone whenever they were especially low on morale. tonight was a better night. daryl and rick scored a big enough animal to ration between everyone. the area was clear, secured, and hidden off. real, light hearted conversation was being had after the serenade.

“the things i’d do to hear the radio right about now…” rick chuckled, everyone smiling sadly. till beth asked what music he used to listen to, what was his favorite song? then to carol, then right back at beth and naturally, to maggie. you tucked into yourself tighter, trying to focus on the warmth from the fire than the fact you have never heard of these musicians and this felt like another painful reminder of how you don’t belong.

“man- yall don’t know nuthin’ bout real music-” daryl shook his head at the artists everyone was naming, scoffing when glenn said something unheard of- indie music?! was he some kinda theater pussy, what did that even mean?- was what daryl said unashamedly.

“oh yeah daryl? what’d you have playing back in your day?” maggie challenged him, everyone wanted to hear. you played with a loose thread on your pants.

“shit, merle always kept a motorhead cd in the truck radio, pantera-”

your eyes flickered up at the mention of something familiar. he listed a few more, a few more you recognized. rick laughed at him so he stopped, brushing everyone off again and going back to aggressively chewing on some squirrel meat.

“what about y/n?” glenn leaned over, everyone following suit. you shrugged, looking back at the ground. his warm, inviting smile and nods to push you to answer somehow encouraged you.

“i also listened to… pantera…” you muttered, awkwardly smiling when everyone reacted- some cheers and claps to the fact you were talking, some jabs at daryl, beth immediately recounting stories of driving to school in her brothers truck where you were singing along with him- more like screaming… you could cry at how good it felt to be apart of this moment. everyone was cheerful, asking you questions, this must’ve been family.

daryl shot you a nod of approval, crossing his arms. “you ever played guitar, kid?” 

you shook your head. daryl looked at you like he wanted something more. “always wanted to, i guess…” he shrugged. “...did you ever play guitar?”

he smirked. leading another story about merle and a guitar, smashed into pieces by the end of the sentence. everyone was in a good mood, you weren’t crying, or dead, or sick. you spoke. you spoke to daryl, the scariest of them all. by extension, now the coolest. desire sparked in you to ask him more- but he was talking with everyone else now. it wasn’t your turn to talk anymore, back you shuffled into the confines of the torn up hoodie you wore. 

a desire to be noticed only burned you during daylight. when the sun set, you wanted to be under the covers and hidden from the world to take 3 hours to fall asleep. you still found a way to take long your depression naps/sleeps/hibernations even during these times. during the day, you hung out with beth but looked across the way to what the men were doing, what michonne was sharpening or training for, lori and maggie caring for everyone. what daryl was doing. you wanted to speak your mind like he did, you wanted to have that masculine aggression that was allowed. most of the time at least; you fought with beth for a while over whether what happened with the barn was normal or justified. it didn’t matter in the end anyways, the living was the only thing important now. you weren’t a fighter, just accepted things as they were.

you squinted one eye to shield the sun as you looked over again to daryl. they were finishing up whatever conversation they were having, shuffling things around, heading back, were they looking for you?

beth’s voice suddenly cut through, pulling you to reality, looking back to her. “come on, help me wash these out. we gotta put em’ up to dry later too.” she was all teeth and smiles, fly aways flowing gently in the breeze. you crouched down and dunked some gut covered fabric into the little river, trying to match beth’s movements as best as possible.

your eyes caught a pair of dirtied up boots walking up, daryl. he wiped his hands off on a towel, then threw it in the growing pile. you peeked at him through a sliver between your hat and shoulder, trying to hide yourself with the rest of your body.

he pointed at you.

“ain’t no way a lil’ girl like you ever listened to pantera. thats conservative shit, girl.” even when daryl was trying (to be… nice?), he always came off aggressive. yet you grinned behind your sleeve.

“i’d listen to great southern trendkill every morning on the way to school.” yet you desired to prove yourself.

daryl actually looked taken back, another approving nod. this time more deeper, like he respected you a little more now. he stepped forward, slapping your shoulder lightly. his fingers were rough and gross, left a mark on your shirt, like he dug in the ground for a living… you’d guess that wasn’t too far off. 

“good shit, kid. see, you ain’t so bad when you ain’t whinin’ all the time.”

you tucked your head between your arms, looking at the wet leaves in the ground under you, hiding away before daryl could catch you grinning and hearing a giggle. before seeing the heat in your cheeks. another playful nudge and he walked away, reminding you both to hurry up. it was almost time to keep heading forward.

the whole trip through the forest was silent on your end. just idly staring at nature, the light peeking through gaps in the leaves, listening out for walkers. you watched rick guide carl and lori. maggie and glen were hand in hand. you, were strangely jealous. very jealous. you thought about daryl, thought back to the town you grew up in before moving to this part of georgia. everything about him reminded you of the hick, survivalist, beer drinking, hard working men men with their tired, cigarette smoking, dish washing wives. you could daryl was from somewhere like that, but that he ended up different. you wondered if he was different because everything changed, or if he was like that even before. thats how you saw yourself- a girl not like her own. maybe it was due to the neglectful nature of your old family, but maybe it didn’t matter anymore, no matter how much you constantly thought of it all.

soon enough, there was a clearing. a fence, a bigger fence, then a prison. safety. the ultimate security- if you guys got in. rick led the group forward, like he always has. tensions were high, but everyone just needed to rest, and soon. it took a lot of work to get through and get in, but all the walker-stabbing went by uninterrupted. you followed behind everyone, finally, in.

the group was soon met with a troubling choice- apparently rick and the others walked in on some old prisoners, and there might be trouble with who gets to stay. and soon enough, the prisoners were integrated into society again- your society. your people.

you sat back with beth and judith, learning how to properly hold her and feed her. you were worried about everything again; rick, carl, hershel, these prisoners. how the hell this baby will make it. why the hell this prisoner was talking to you and beth.

“you’re a real good mom. you two ladies sisters, or jus’ friends?” he flashed a smile, and you were disgusted. you hated guys like this. no wonder he was in jail before, why he’s still there now.

“hey man,” a voice shouted from above you, all three looking up at an instant. daryl leaned over the railing above you, staring directly at the convict. “shut the hell up an’ leave em’ alone man, get on, ‘fore i come down there.” 

the man raised his arms in defeat, muttering about him not doing nothing- just talking. you watched him shuffle away, tucking himself into his cell across the corridor. you looked back up at daryl, gripping tight to the rail and leaning further to also make sure he went away. 

“you two-” he looked down, but you already were meeting his gaze. “...don’t be talkin’ to strangers. ‘specially not him.” 

beth rolled her eyes, giggling with judith. you kept looking up. 

“guys like him should’ve got death penalty.” you said loudly, beth gasping and laughing some more. you shouldn’t say things like that so loud. daryl scoffed, eyes wide with shock.

“gotta tell rick you’re sum’ kinda badass kid. at least you’re smart.” 

daryl’s approval meant you were doing something right. you tried to bite back a wide smile. if you said that to someone else, they probably would’ve told you murder was bad, or to not worry about it, rick has it figured out. you could figure out that these guys were just as much a problem as any one else. they should take daryl’s advice: don’t talk to strangers. after all that’s happened since getting them involved, the possible threat from a neighboring group, the dead.

one day, glenn came back from a run, with bottles clinking in carriers. the room was silent, everyone staring at him. glenn’s smile dropped, looking around the room. 

“what? no one wants a drink right now, really?” glenn was stunned for a few seconds before he started unloading the boxes of beer to the tables, everyone now staring down at the bottles in front of them.

“i don’t know glenn-” rick sucked his teeth, talking about the unknown dangers outside. hershel stood himself up, shoulder on his hand.

“you guys cut yourself some slack. i’ll take watch with the girls, we’ll all take turns. why the hell not.” 

like he said the magic words, everyone else shrugged and got to popping caps. this also felt all too familiar. lori passed judith off to maggie and carol helped her walk over to the center table to join in. rick chuckled, bringing the bottle to his wife’s lips. you watched the room get brighter, over some drinks. your family wrecked hell over it. weird to see.

“c’mon girls, let’s head outside. might wanna get outta here before everyone gets too crazy.” maggie nudged her head towards the door, beth standing up and sighing.

“comin, y/n?” she held her hands on her hips. you nodded.

“i’ll be out in a little… might go check out the other side of the block too.” 

beth shrugged, taking judith’s small hand and waving bye to you as her and maggie made their way out. they could only ever ask things of you, but hershel couldn’t technically boss you around. not like you were actually their’s. sitting back on the bench, you watched everyone else for a little. touching bottles to each other, letting out long-awaited sighs of relief, letting loose. maybe they were all well aware it won’t- can’t- last too long. just a get down these drinks tonight, and by the morning get back to work securing the place. the group that michonne reported weighed on everyones mind. they had bigger walls and a working town, with people. even a governor. too good to be true, you could sense that much. not everyone was sold just yet, so until then, they drank.

you saw everyone laughing and faces red, acting unlike themselves. you wished you could join them, looking up at the stars in the sky from the doorway, wishing to be like everyone else. anyone else. you wished you had snuck out to that party with beth when you guys still had places to sneak off to. you wanted to have been at the mall with beth picking out skirts and dresses, getting ice cream and walking down trails, picking flowers as you passed by.

“aye, badass!”

you whipped your head around, seeing daryl waving you over. 

“why don’t you get another beer, bring it on over here.”

in any other world, any other day, any other man, you would’ve scoffed and rolled your eyes with disdain. a middle finger and maybe a curse word, reminding you of older male cousins and high school boys and your father. yet you already made your way towards the adults, setting another bottle down. quick and careful. daryl looked at you with a strange expression, like he was waiting for more from you. the others snorted and giggled.

“well, wanna sit down with us, y/n?” lori tapped the seat beside her. 

“ya think drunk people are funny?” rick never smiled like that, ever, you thought. it made you want to smile. if rick was happy, either something was very wrong, or you should just shut up and drink with the grown ups.

“sittin’ there and j-just starin’,” daryl chuckled, taking a swig. he popped open yours. “if you wanted sum’ could’ve asked. n-not like we got shit to do. you got sum shit to do tomorruh’, girl?”

“we got a lotta shit… to do…” rick slurred. 2 packs, gone down the drain. you could tell him and daryl did most of the damage. they were funny drunks, not raging ones, so that was good.

a small sip from your murky yellow beer and a sour expression got everyone laughing again. your bravery to keep sipping got you some claps. when the bottle was turned to the ceiling and filling your empty stomach, lori and carol put concerning hands on yours. when you slammed the counter and let out a sick burp, daryl gave you a standing ovation.

“fuckin’ hell. you chugged that s-shit lil lady!” he cheered, whooping and hollering and causing a ruckus. glenn pulled him back to his seat and tried sushing him, falling over in laughter. you kinda felt it, a pit in your stomach, head light. your mouth watered to speak, to make them all laugh again. it wasn’t changing you like it did them.

it was your turn to point at daryl, pursed lips and finally ready for your first drunken words. “dimebag… daryl.” 

he was the only one cracking up, clearly enjoying that one. when daryl realized no one was laughing because they got what you said but just because of his reaction, he sat down abruptly and kept scoffing to himself and drunkenly ranting about everyone being dumb. “‘cept you y/n. your in mah’ books, written down! just for that one, don’t matter bout them!” he made no sense anymore, tapping his pointer finger into the metal table a few times to further his ‘point’. then a few slaps, then some fist slams as he started yelling.

rick tried to calm him down, the sudden aggression surprising everyone. of course rick was the first one on top of that. you, drunkenly, dizzy, stared up at him. you frowned as the pit in your stomach deepened, made you sick. 

“what, ain’t no one laughin’ now..? don- don’t look at me that.” daryl tore his arm away from rick, eyes hooded yet staring fiercely down at you. he looked around the group, swinging his empty bottle around as he stepped out from the table, grumbling himself right out the door into the night air. 

everyone sighed, not relieved, not happy- disappointed. maybe you shouldn’t have went over, maybe you should’ve just went outside with beth. maybe, maybe, maybe…

the world spun out, your heart beating, throat closing up. it became hard to breathe, the feelings of not wanting to breathe anymore, to go back in time, to pick up pieces you didn’t break. if this is what drunk was, you never wanted it again.

you stumbled away from everyone despite them trying to get you to sit. “j-jus… need air…” you managed to force out, tripping over your feet right out the makeshift sheet of a door. the cold air hit you, nipping at your face and exposed arms. you felt just okay enough to not throw up, but anxious and terrified enough to be nauseous. you knew what you had to do.

you held onto the chipping brick wall, dried blood- walker or person? didn’t know- the smell of them from all the bodies everyone cleared out. it was still there, days later. you gagged, spitting on the ground. you needed to push through. you needed this- this feeling- out. now.

your finger found itself down your throat, and one time was all it took. vomit spewed out, not too much, not enough food in the world. foamy, fizzy beer floated at your feet. soaked into the earth beneath you. spitting the bile out your mouth, you gasped for air, gagging some more. tears fell down your cheeks. you hated throwing up. you hated you knew how to.

“fuck you doin’, dammit, tryna piss in peace.” 

you jumped out of your skin at daryl’s rough voice, turning around to see him pulling his pants up and buttoning up. there was a strange puddle by his feet, dripping down into the cracks of the concrete. your cheeks puffed up with another gag, turning away.

maggie and beth came through to your side, guess they must’ve heard the news. you already heard hershel rounding everyone up and back to their ‘rooms’. 

“y/n, what are you doing! drinking?!” maggie nagged you like you were hers. this wasn’t her family to be disappointed in. beth rubbed your back, glaring at her older sister. 

“w-who made you in charge of me, huh!?” you pushed her away, the words already pouring out. before, you couldn’t make a sound. now you felt like everything was coming apart. more tears. “j-just cawse- i didn’t- you’re not-” 

words and words with no meaning. you had no idea how to say what you felt, all of it was inside. it needed to get out, it hurt to stay in. 

daryl cringed, glass bottle dropping and crunching under his boot. “oh fuckin’- here goes the crying again. keep that shit in-inside, gonna ‘tract all the walkers again, fuckin little-”

both sisters shoved daryl back inside, calling for someone to get their dog. they returned their attention back to you, sniveling and confused. maggie wiped down your face with her bare hands, shaking her head softly.

“you’re not a good drunk, y/n.” beth’s attempt at comforting you as a friend fell on the wrong kind of ears. her words mean you’re not good enough, you don’t bring a good time. you, are a stupid, stupid girl. you messed everything up. they brought you back inside to clean you up and get you to bed. everyone at the table looked dumbfounded confused as you trudged by, you heard glenn whisper “i don’t even… know what just happened.”

[umtrem]

ALL-NEW VENOM #4 SPOILERS

ok, I actually had to read this issue because well... Flash Thompson is here and I'm just living up to my obsession. so, uh, here we go I guess

Let's start with the fact that Flash is doing his best to keep Toxin and Sleeper, who have been arrested, safe. Although he has made some deals, he doesn't seem to have kept any of them.

It's really cool to see that he's feeding them. And Toxin doesn't look too good and is worried about Bren, which is fair enough since they get along well as host/symbiote.

Okay, Flash, you could have been less of a jerk about that. I still can't believe they made him say something so insensitive. Well, be an idiot, but be a quiet idiot please.

I have nothing to say about this entire panel. I'm just very sad about this situation...They are being treated like prisoners ready to be deported or worse, and THIS IS CRUEL. Toxin just wants its host back.

I can't describe Flash's reaction to hearing this. It's hard to say. He's still very lucky, or almost. A little, at least.

And I wonder why he still keeps his friends at bay. I mean, ever since Venom War and that short interaction with Peter, they haven't spoken. And then... well, it seems complicated that he's in this situation now and trying his best not to screw it up.

Sleeper 'chilling' like a normal cat. Of course, he has a plan I imagine, after all, he is one of if not THE strongest symbiote on Earth and one of the most intelligent too. Well, that's for later.

This lady is a complete symbiote hater. and Flash is defending the symbiotes, as he should!!

and... oh I have so much to say about this...

This lady wants to exterminate the symbiotes and arrest their hosts, worse, she wants to ARREST THREE CHILDREN for having been hosts of symbiotes.

That's the deal! Flash is at least trying to keep the kids safe from getting arrested, I understand why he needed to send Dylan to MJ since she's a superhero now and it should be easier for her to deal with the situation, although it is not easy. (Paul is still the problem, we can't forget that)

and I want to add that... this lady is completely crazy. she is blackmailing Flash using Dylan's security... Well, when this run started, I imagined that he would go after Venom to find out where they were and who the new host was to help Dylan in some way. I just didn't imagine it would be under threat...

and then let's go a little further forward that, honestly, I don't care so much about Madame Mesque being evil and working for Modok.

so the cool part is that Sleeper is controlling Rick Jones. they are Sleeper Agent, now!

and it's adorable that they went to Venom's rescue. yeah that's adorable

but ok, overall this issue was short and didn't have much of Dylan, I missed him :((

it explained a few things. and no mention of Eddie and his side adventure which is curious to me.

Well, I don't know what to expect from the next issue, we'll have the reveal of the host who is (please, I hope everyone who said it was Paul is wrong). and I don't know, maybe a hunt?

I just know that all of this is terrible.

I hope Dylan shows up next time.

[sheriffgrimes-archerdixon]

Practice makes perfect

Request: please could you write one where Rick helps inexperienced reader shoot a gun and he also teaches her how to defend herself? Thank you!

A/N: hope this is okay!! Would you all like to see a daryl version of this??

Rick grimes x fem! Reader

You were new to the prison environment, you had stumbled upon the prison when you had lost your people to the dead. It was terrifying but thankfully Rick grimes and his people welcomed you in with open arms— or… well. Held at gunpoint. But that’s beside the point. You had been here for almost 18 days now and you were fitting in just right. You had found comfort within Hershel the kind man who seemed to be incredibly loyal and genuine. Not to mention his kindness towards everything was gratefully accepted during times like these. Beth too was a sweet girl but there were a few of the group who seemed a bit rough around the edges. Not that you minded of course, you were just glad you could say you had some kind of “friends.”

Here you were positioned near the gate where walkers were pressing themselves against, ruthlessly clawing at the metal structure desperate for the taste of flesh. You stood silently staring and listening to their groans and moans your hand numbly gripping onto the pistol that dangled by your side. It might’ve seemed stupid but you had never shot a gun in your life. And now that you were in this situation you wished you had accepted the many times family members offered to take you to the shooting range when the world was still normal. You exhaled shaking your head before you pointed your gun at one of the walkers heads, squinting your eyes slightly your finger resting upon the trigger as you tried to figure out how to do it, footsteps slowing just behind you— ricks scrutinising eyes examined you thoroughly before he cleared his throat. “The safety’s one” his thick accent touched your ears and you quickly glanced at him “what?” You murmured nervously “the safety’s on. That’s why you can’t pull the trigger.” He vaguely explained taking steps towards you before stopping beside you, slender fingers grasping onto the metal of the gun as he stood side by side with you his arm brushing lightly against yours “look,” he tilted the gun your way his thumb brushing against the metal before a click was heard “safety’s off now.” He spoke before slowly handing it back to you. “Try now.”

He took a step back giving you room to try but now under this much pressure you felt your nerves kick in. You were worried that because you didn’t know how to shoot a gun without looking like an idiot you’d be seen as someone lesser and be kicked out the group. But really that was just your over thinking. You hesitantly pointed the gun towards a specific walker Rick remaining silent as he observed you fingertips lightly brushing against the handle of his own gun it was just engraved into his mind to constantly do just in case he had to pull it on anyone or anything at any point. You couldn’t ever be too careful… you glanced back at him momentarily he was hard to read, you then looked forward again steadying your breath as you attempted it. And with one last deep breath you pulled the trigger the bullet flying through the air and zipping straight past the walkers a silent cuss leaving your lips as you shook your head embarrassed. “Not bad.” Rick spoke calmly, as if noting your anxious state and how you seemed to be slightly apprehensive about shooting the gun. He took a step towards you stopping beside you “have you ever shot a gun before?” He questioned and you glanced at him before shaking your head “no. I didn’t like using guns when the world was normal…” you murmur nervously and he only nods. “That’s understandable” he soon comments “I was a sheriff in Atlanta before all of this.” Rick began talking, your eyes snapping back towards him as you listened to him silently admiring him his jaw slightly clenching every now and then his baby blue eyes holding many memories within them. His eyes moved to look at you “so I was all involved in guns and protecting myself and my people.” He spoke as if trying to make you more comfortable. Opening up little by little…

“My wife…. She hated the thought of our son using guns. She refused to let him near them. Even when I offered to train him up for if anything ever happened she wouldn’t let him… even when the world went to shit… she wouldn’t let him touch a gun…” he analysed you as he spoke “until I convinced her enough… I wish I had held back slightly..” he swallowed thickly glancing down at the ground as he remembered the thought of Carl shooting his own mum. If Rick hadn’t of taught him how to shoot a gun then would Carl of shot Lori? It was a question left for speculation. No one truly knew. But Rick did feel guilt when he thought on it really hard… that’s why he tried to push it all down. Keeping it all at the back of his brain. “So I get where you’re coming from. But knowing how to shoot a gun now is… something we all need.” He spoke simply turning his back to you momentarily before he pulled his own gun out the sun reflecting off of the metal slightly making it glint every now and then “just copy my stance alright.” He spoke and you nodded watching as he put one foot forwards the other foot remaining in place almost as if he was bracing himself before he held the gun with two hands— one on the handle and trigger the other cupping it slightly as if to keep it stable. “Holding with both hands isn’t absolutely necessary but holding it with both hands keeps your focus and hands from shaking.” Rick explained and you nodded watching as he shot the gun the bullet immediately piercing the skull of the dead as it collapsed onto the ground. “Your turn.”

He spoke before backing away, and you exhaled shakily breathing in sharply as you attempted to copy his exact positioning slowly raising your gun until it was eye level with you both your hands steadying the gun “like this?” You murmured nervously Rick moving to your side his hands grabbing onto your elbow slightly ���tilt” he suggested calmly making you tilt your arm ever so slightly before he moved behind you resting your hands on your shoulders knowing the force of the gun was far too powerful sometimes. He kept his hands on your shoulders “focus…” he advised gently and you nodded focusing as hard as you could. You inhaled sharply lining up the gun more straight before pulling the trigger the bullet piercing through a walkers shoulder “good. You’re getting there.” Rick praised before he reached forwards grabbing onto your hands as he positioned your hands more correctly “just remember they’re dead. Okay?” He spoke almost as if reading your mind. Knowing that you were struggling with the fact that these were once human beings. Just like you and him. “But they…” you swallowed thickly not knowing how to describe it, Rick maintaining eye contact with you “look at it this way y/n…. They don’t feel anything. They only have one job and one job only. Successfully get the food they’re constantly searching for. It’s a cycle… a painful cycle. If you shoot them you’re putting them out of their misery right?” He was right and eventually you nodded. You still needed to detach the people from the actual walkers and whom they once were but that would be a learning curve. “Alright shoot.” He spoke and you took a deep breath before squinting your eyes and once steadying your hands you shot the gun the smell of gunpowder growing stronger but you didn’t mind. You watched as the bullet pierced into the dead’s skull as it collapsed to the ground,

“Good. Again.” He spoke. The sun was starting to set and Rick knew it wouldn’t be long before more walkers started arriving. You then lined up the gun again before shooting the bullet again successfully hitting the Walker square in the head. You continued doing this over and over again until the clouds had turned a deep orangey colour rain specs starting to fall upon you and him “you did great.” Rick spoke with a faint smile “you’re going to be a pro at this soon enough. Gonna put us to shame.” He murmured nudging you playfully and you couldn’t help but smile slightly “thank you… could we do this again tomorrow?” Rick nodded slightly “sure. I’ll get you up at 7 am sharp.” He spoke and you nodded smiling as you began walking back towards the main area of the prison with him. “After all practice makes perfect.” He chuckled out lightly you could tell that helping you practice had alleviated something off of his shoulders and mind… and the same was said for you.

You walked inside with him some people eating some food and others already sleeping “I’m going to go to my cell.” You murmured and Rick nodded “goodnight. Sleep well. If you need anything just shout.” He spoke and you nodded watching as he began walking away. “Rick..” you spoke, making him stop as he turned to look at you Judith being handed to him as he held onto her securely his free hand skilfully putting his gun back onto safety “thank you. Seriously. Uh… you saved a girls life.” You spoke, Rick looking slightly confused but appreciative. “I lost my people. To the walkers…. I was close to just waiting for another herd to come take me down… you and your people gave me a reason to live.” The look on ricks face was difficult to read but he looked grateful, happy and somewhat relieved all at once. “Glad you’re still with us, y/n.” He gave you a nod lips curling up into a small smile. “Go get some rest. I’ll see you in the morning.” He gave you another curt nod before turning around tending to his daughter and you silently watched him before retreating back to your bunk a small sad smile forming on your lips— grateful for him and his people who had given you a reason to survive. You got into your bunk laying down as you began getting comfortable until you heard a slight creek before the familiar teenage boy was hanging over the top bunk “hey y/n” Carl spoke cowboy hat barely staying on and you smiled tiredly at him “hey.” He then disappeared momentarily before coming back continuing to dangle off the bed “don’t fall…” you warned with a tired smile and he only smiled holding out a red packeted chocolate bar for you to take. “Just in case you were hungry.” He spoke not letting up until you had taken it from him before he laid back down on the top bunk “thanks carl.” You spoke hearing the sound of pages turning and you smiled knowing he was reading his comic… what a thoughtful boy… a thoughtful group whom you didn’t deserve in the slightest. But you knew they’d continue over and over again giving you a reason to live.

[thelaughtercafe]

Abandoned

Tea Type: Milk Tea

Potential Triggers: Struggling with eating in an anorexic manner as well as intentional sleep deprivation and self care in general.

Pairing: Daryl/F! Reader (Can be read platonic)

Length: 2.4k+

Summary: Daryl leaves, and by the time he comes home you've completely stopped taking care of yourself, much to his upset. He comforts and helps you get back on the right track.

A/N: Me? Writing more self-indulgent comfort about struggling with eating, sleep and self care? It’s more likely than you think! Also maybe I’ve binged nearly 3 whole seasons of The Walking Dead and fell in love with Daryl again. That probably didn’t help. This is just pure fluff and hurt/comfort!

When Rick and the others returned, your eyes scanned them all instinctively for injuries and when you didn’t see him, you swallowed hard.

“…Where is he?”

Your voice cracked as you looked to Carol and she gave you a watery smile of her own.

“He left. Found Merle and made his choice.”

Her voice was gentle and understanding but all you felt was abandoned and cold and angry. A rare emotion for you to feel at your family. When she went to move forward and put a hand on your shoulder you cringed and hugged yourself instead.

Your heart-broken gaze moved to Rick.

“No. You-you just let him leave?! How could you?”

“We didn’t have a choice. He was gonna bring Merle back-”

“So you just abandoned him?! Let him leave? After everything we’ve been through? Everything he’s done for us?!”

Tears streamed freely down both cheeks and you moved to storm out of the metal gates when Glenn stopped you with a hand on your upper arm.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

You roughly pulled away and leveled a glare his way.

“Get off me! You all might be fine with abandoning him to die with his brother, just the two of them out there, but I’m not. I’d rather take my chances with someone I know will be loyal.”

You whirled to look at the whole group, angrily wiping away your tears.

“Y'know what? Merle was a dick. He was rude, and crass and didn’t care about anyone but his brother. He could be monstrous and I’m not negating that. But don’t forget that Daryl was different too in the beginning, before we gave him the chance to change. And even if Merle didn’t- even if he was still a jerk who put himself before others- I trust Daryl enough to adapt and be loyal to us both. To try and help his brother change. I thought you all would too.”

When you moved to the gate you frowned as Carol blocked the way glare weakening to upset.

“…Please, move Carol. I have to do this.”

“Do what? Get yourself killed? Starve to death as you search for them like needles in a haystack? I may have lost him but I am not losing you too. And he’d never want you to go out there and put yourself at risk. He’d never forgive any of us if we let you leave. Deep down, I think you know that.”

You stared one another down before giving a bitter, watery laugh.

“Guess we’ll never know what he would think now, would we? Whatever. I’ll be in my cell if anyone needs me.”

—–

The following days were beyond painful. You found yourself constantly looking for him on instinct, used to his grounding presence just a ways in front or back of you, the way he’d mumble quips under his breath that made you smile, blush or laugh. You missed your late night talks. Remember as you’d warmed up to him. Told him “Ohana means family. Family means no-one gets left behind.” You recalled the way he’d smirked a little and nudged you with a mumbled. “What are you, 5?” You’d gone on to defend Lilo and Stitch and nudged him back with a playful smile. It had been cold that night and he’d wrapped his arms around you, made you feel safe.

And now, you’d never felt more vulnerable and isolated. You understood what he felt like at the start. Everyone looked at you like you were a wild animal, something to be pitied that could lash out at any time.

Luckily Beth and Glenn had finally given up, but Carol was persistent. You walked around the prison on patrol, her right at your back.

“Please, eat something at least, if you won’t sleep. It’s been days. Daryl wouldn’t want you to-”

“Would you stop saying that? I already told you. I’ll eat and sleep when he’s back, not a second sooner.”

“You’re acting like a child!”

Your eyes flared as you turned to her, though your expression remained cool.

“Well maybe I finally got tired being the mature one all the time. I’m still doing my part, helping everyone else. Just stop caring. Clearly it’s easy enough for everyone else to.”

Aaron joined you both as you were turning to leave when suddenly gunfire rang out, making you drop and pull Carol down with you instinctively. Aaron fell suddenly and you gasped as you saw he’d been shot in the head. Carol’s face grew steely as she positioned the body in front of you both, holding you to her tightly. Thankfully your tiny frame was easily covered.

“You stay still and you don’t move alright?”

Carol’s voice was shaky as you heard shouts ring out all around you. Are you being attacked? You hated that even now you still shook from adrenaline and fear. You heard Maggie cry out as she provided cover fire.

“Carol, take her and go!!”

You both jumped up and rushed over to where you could see Beth and Carl, grabbing guns.

A car could be heard speeding and you took the time to catch your breath as you watched in anxious horror as walkers came out of the back, hordes of them. Your mind raced, trying to figure out where everyone else was. You could all be together and deal with the threat.

You did not want to lose anyone else.

In the distance you saw Glenn and Michonne helping what looked like Hershel thank God and when they pulled up you hugged them all, quickly thinking of who else was left. Rick. Where the Hell was Rick?

You asked Hershel as much and he reassured you.

“Calm down. I saw him, he’s gonna be alright.”

He looked towards the others.

“…He’s not alone. Daryl and his brother are back. Look.”

He raised his chin behind you and you sighed in immeasurable relief at the sight. Thank God. Your core family was still together.

You all gathered and some slept while others spoke quietly in the night. You couldn’t even look at Daryl. Not yet. You didn’t want to break; not when the situation was so precarious.

Once morning came discussions began in earnest on what to do. Some wanted to leave, others wanting to stay. Rick went to leave again and Hershel finally snapped, understandably so.

When Rick returned he began allocating and you sighed as Glenn spoke up, mind racing as you tried to think of the best course of action.

“There’s barely any food or ammo.”

Daryl mumbled back.

“Been there before. We’ll be alright.”

“That was when it was just us. Before there was a snake in the nest.”

You frowned.

“Man we gonna go through this again? Look, Merle’s staying here. He’s with us now. Get used to it. All y'all.”

He stormed off as Rick tried to stop him, heading to the second floor.

You watched the group debate.

You understood both perspectives, you really did. But with a final glance around at the others, you knew where you stood, deciding to voice it when Glenn asked a dangerous question.

“Deliver Merle to the governor. Bargaining chip. Give him his traitor, maybe declare a truce.”

You moved to glare up at him, knowing he was hurting and trying to temper your instinct; protectiveness and annoyance.

“No-one’s saying you have to like the guy or forgive him, Glenn. But think about Daryl. For once. He’s done so much for us without asking for anything in return. The least we can do is offer his family a place here.”

You scoffed as you moved to go to your cell.

“At the very least, he certainly deserves better than you talking about killing his brother in cold blood behind his back."

"Like he wouldn’t throw you to the Walkers to get away the first chance he got.”

You paused at Glenn’s hiss, before looking behind your shoulder at him, ignoring the dizziness that was making you lightheaded.

“You’re probably right. But I also know Daryl would put his life on the line to protect me from that same Walker. That’s the difference. I know why you feel the way you do, and I am truly sorry for what you and Maggie both went through. But Daryl? He’s worth more to me than revenge you think will make you feel better. And deep down I think you feel that way too.”

You walked away before he could say anything more and headed up to see Daryl. You were safe for now, and you couldn’t wait any longer.

He was waiting on his bed, fiddling with his arrows. You took a shaky breath to try and steel yourself but when you opened your mouth his eyes abruptly cut to you.

“When was the last time you ate or slept?”

You winced and looked away, mouth closing as you’d gone quiet. You swallowed nervously.

“…haven’t since you left.”

“‘Scuse me?!”

You looked back at him when his voice rose and saw the anger in his eyes.

“The Hell you mean you ain’t ate or slept since I left? It’s been 4 days now.”

“It doesn’t matter, I’ll do it now okay so just-”

You turned to leave, cheeks burning in humiliation at your secret being out but looked back as rough calloused fingers curled around your arm.

“Like Hell it don’t matter! Look at me!”

You met his eyes and your tears finally fell as you did so. The aggressive tone was a bit triggering, but you and him both knew you wouldn’t have broken down like you needed to otherwise.

“I’m sorry okay!? I didn’t want you to know, I thought-I just…”

You used your free hand to cover your mouth as you sobbed.

“I didn’t want to live in a world you weren’t here with me! They wouldn’t let me go find you so I just- I just shut down. It was good anyway, Carl’s a growing kid and I’d rather my portion be used to help the others than go to waste. It was a good thing!”

Your voice cracked and you looked away to try and gather yourself when Daryl gently guided your face back to look him in the eye.

“You sacrificin’ yourself while spiraling ain't a good thing. I promise I won’t leave like that again. An’ if I ever did, I’d come back for ya. But that means ya gotta take care of yourself. Not worry the others. Beth told me, soon as I got in. Told me you was bein’ a damn fool and to get some sustenance and sleep in ya.”

You gave a watery laugh at that and moved to hug him, hiding your face in his neck and taking comfort in the warmth and solidness of him.

“Should’ve known she’d tell you. Between her and Carol it was getting pretty difficult. Pretty sure Carol was just gonna start force-feeding me soon.”

His husky chuckle made you melt further into him but he sighed and pulled back, raising his chin toward the 1rst floor.

“She must’ve got her stubborn streak from watchin’ you. Now, get some food first before you doze off, you can eat it here with me and then you’re going the Hell to bed. Y'know I’ll wake you soon as anything happens.”

You blushed at the embarrassing question you wanted to ask but he beat you to it, fingers running through your hair in the familiar way he did when you’d have a nightmare or insomnia before he left.

“Obviously I’ll be right by your side. You ain’t the only one who was strugglin’. Kept looking over my shoulder to make sure you were alright. I want you in my sight. 'Specially knowing what stupid shit you’ll do if separated from me again.”

You smiled at the fondness in his tone and pulled away to go get food. The dizziness was getting worse so you grabbed an apple and called it good as you trucked up the stairs again to his room.

He frowned a bit at the small portion but sighed in defeat after a moment from where he was back on the bottom bunk.

“Apple for now is fine, it’s probably best you get your stomach used to food again anyhow.”

You forced the apple down despite your lack of hunger since Daryl was back. That was what you’d promised Carol. You didn’t want anyone to worry about you anymore. You’d been selfish enough. Clearly you weren’t as slick as you thought if both Beth and Carol had caught on.

When you finished it down to the core he moved over to make a small space for you to cuddle into, eyes still locked on his arrow. You couldn’t stifle your smile and moved to make yourself comfortable. Wall at your back and Daryl at your right it felt like you could breathe again and you couldn’t help your yawn at the familiar position.

“Here. I doubt you’ll need if since you’re so tired but it never hurts.”

His voice was gruff but you saw the intimacy of the action as he tossed his familiar leather jacket over you, knowing you slept infinitely better with a blanket.

“You can use me as a pillow too, if ya need. I’m not goin’ anywhere.”

You relaxed completely and let yourself feel safe and contented as you snuggled into his shoulder and neck. The warmth emanating from him was already making you drift off and the dizziness was fading.

“Thanks for not leaving me. Sorry for being stupid and selfish and… like a child.”

He chuckled at that and moved one of his arms to circle you and pull you closer, ruffling your hair before continuing to play with it.

“S'fine. Everyone’s warranted a temper tantrum now and then. Just don’ make a habit of it or I’ll have to smack ya upside the head good.”

“Yeah, right. A big…softie like you?”

You stifled another yawn.

“Doubt it.”

He smiled and you blissfully passed into unconsciousness. He looked up as Carol leaned against the doorway, a wry smile on her face.

“Haven’t had a chance to say. I’m glad you came back.”

He scoffed a little.

“To what? All this?”

Carol came to sit down, voice quiet but clear.

“This is our home.”

He met her eyes meaningfully.

“This is a tomb.”

“That’s what T-Dog called it. Thought he was right…till you found me.”

Her voice was somber but gentle.

“He’s your brother, but he’s not good for you. Don’t let him bring you down. After all, look how far you’ve come.”

Her eyes moved to you sleeping soundly against him in meaning and he looked away a moment before looking back as they shared a chuckle.

[carlsdarling]

Autistic reader x carl headcannons please!

Carl x Autistic! Reader headcanons

Y/N is autistic, but Carl likes her anyway and gets used to it... Some headcanons. Everyone is 18 or over.

WARNINGS: lowkey smut

In the beginning, when you were new in Alexandria, Carl (like everyone else) wondered about your strange and distant behavior. And about the fact that you often hung out with Eugene and had very bizarre conversations with him. About aircraft. Or dead bodies. Or anything else that didn't interest anyone but autistic people. Eugene: "Most people are happy to be invited to a birthday party." You: "Really?"

Accordingly, Carl was offended when he invited you to his 18th birthday party a few weeks later and you said you didn't feel like having a party, that he should invite someone else. Ron, for example. "But he's already invited!" You: *shrugs your shoulders and walks away*.

But since Carl had a thing for you from the start, he doesn't give up and keeps trying to get closer to you and do stuff with you. "All right, let's read the book on autopsies together," you suggested. Carl stared at you. "Are you bullshitting me?"

But gradually Carl found out what your passions were, so he regularly got white flowers for you. And nougat chocolate, perfume and nail polish. You naturally find it hard to form attachments to other people, but you began to grow fond of Carl. He soon became the only person you sometimes wanted to have around for long periods of time.

Carl would spend hours watching you make drawings, one of your talents. You made drawings of all the inhabitants of Alexandria, and Carl observed you with complete fascination. But not when you drew his portrait, because you did that secretly; you wanted to surprise him with it. When it was finished, you went to him and held the picture out to him without saying a word. Carl: "What's that?" You: "I made it for you." Carl (smiling) "That's brilliant!" You: "Yes, it is. I'm good at drawing."

Carl defends you vehemently whenever someone makes fun of your behavior and the fact that you are autistic. "She's just different, not worse than anyone else!"

At some point, you kiss for the first time. You: "That feels kind of weird, your tongue in my mouth. But I think I like it." Carl rolled his eyes, and from then on you guys kissed a lot.

The first time Carl tried to seduce you, you didn't understand what he actually wanted because he didn't tell you explicitly. He asked if you wanted to go to the bedroom. You: "No." Irritated and miffed, Carl glared at the TV again. "Then fine." He had assumed you were ready for this. You were, but he should have asked differently. An awkward silence fell until you blurted out, "Carl, do you want to have sex with me? In my room?" Carl shaking his head, "Yes, damn it. I just asked you if you wanted us to go upstairs." You: "No, you didn't say anything about sex."

The first time you had sex, you analyzed everything and anything when Carl touched you here and there, how his dick looked and felt, how it smelled and tasted, until Carl just locked your lips with his and eventually you just moaned and didn't say anything anyway except "Carl... Carl... Carl..."

Always a challenge: dinner with Carl's family. Uncomplicated conversation is only with Judith, who can't talk much yet. Michonne and Rick are always perplexed by how your brain works and the strange course conversations with you took. Michonne has gotten used to it faster than Rick.

Publicly holding hands with Carl so that Eugene stared at you with his mouth open in amazement.

Tags: @loveforcarl @knochentrocken0808

[biscuitbox23]

Dead weight.

summary: you run into the woods to get away from the group, you were reaching the end of your life as you suffer from aplastic anemia, only to get stopped by Rick.

A/n: I’m not a medical expert, i have no familiarity with the field of medicine I am just an idiot who is a sucker for terribly made sad stories. This may be a very long opening to the actual climax so im sorry for that :( please do DM me for advice on how i can make my fanfictions better!

Warnings: inaccurate depictions of the illness, non-established relationship (rick and reader), mentions of death, angst, cursing. (Not much due to me being a minor.) somewhat bad grammar since English isn’t my second language.

words: 1.3K

It has been a while, well, a while since you had a good stock of medicine. You had been in an abandoned cabin a few months after the outbreak. During it, you got stuck in a pharmacy in Atlanta. The law was gone now, so you hoarded a ton of antibiotics, capsules, injections, and anything you could get your grubby hands on.

When Rick and Daryl saved you from a trio of men who were trying to take advantage of you, you joined them and did not stay inside forever, especially when blood stained the floors of your shelter. It was a mistake.

You wanted to stay with yourself, isolated from the horrors and sacrifices that the world has offered now. It was harder to find medication now that most stores were stripped clean. It was easier for you to catch minor fevers, and you tended to have more rest than the others in the group. The only reason you were there is because you knew how to survive.

In the woods, in the apocalypse, no problem. Whatever your dad knew your dad would teach you, he was an outdoor person and loved to forage different shrooms and plants. God knows what happened to him.

You grew closer to the group, helping them find food and clean water, scavenging what you can find in abandoned retail stores (even if it does not have much importance.)

Now you find yourself walking out of Alexandria by attempting to climb the steel borders to the outside of the wall, your head spinning as drowsiness has consumed you to your very core, yet you still have the urge to continue. Or else you are just dead weight. You had a few foot slips —you swear, Enid makes it look easy— but managed to get out. You can sense your muscles aching as if you did not even have the strength to pull yourself up despite climbing trees more than a million times when you were a teen. You needed to disappear 

from the people, the group. Rick.

Rick was a leader, for sure. He had all the correct morals and cunningness and looked up to him for it. You were no longer the person of any use to him and his group. You could not even defend yourself without stumbling down to the ground.

You were around when T-dog and Lori passed away. You 

remembered falling for Rick when you first saw him, only to discover he had a pregnant wife and a kid. It started like a rocky road. You were so used to the isolation that it took a lot of convincing to get you to come with them to the prison.

You took a liking to his daughter Judith. You loved babies. It was a surprise. You thought that you would never find a baby in this world again. Carl was the closest to you. You tell him stories about your life and would do the same, reminiscing about the world that used to be. He praised his father a lot and got a good idea of what Rick was like as a father. Hershel would check up on your health while Rick would stand beside the old sport as Hershel examines you.

Making your way into the woods, you stopped by a tree to take a breather. Your hands were on your knees as you stared down to the ground, crinkles of the leaves crushing on the bottom of your shoes. The night was cold and airy. The chill on the tip of your nose was evident as you took one more glance at the haven that shielded the real outside world from its inhabitants. The sour stench of rotting meat was not detectable and gave some fresh air — It is not like you cannot get fresh air in Alexandria. You want to be alone most of the time.

“thought I'd find you here." A voice called out, the voice echoing in your ears sounding familiar as the crunching of leaves has gotten closer and closer.

“fuck” you curse under your breath, “how did you find me?”

“Carl saw you tryin’ to climb the walls.”

“huh,” you playfully scoffed but was met with a chill and a cough, “thought I was being sneaky…”

“what're you doin’ out here?” Rick asks out of the blue, staring you up and down as you lean back into the tree.

“Rick," you sighed heavily, “go back.”

“I'm not goin’ back till you tell me what happened, y‘know that, don’t you?” Rick asked with a twinge of concern mixed with his southern drawl.

You paused.

“I'm leaving, Alexandria,” You rubbed your forehead as your stomach grumbled. Sliding down to sit as your back leaned onto the tree further.

“If this is about your illness we can make—“Before Rick could finish his sentence you interrupted.

“Make it work? Yeah, I don’t think so…” You retorted, “You don’t understand, Rick. I have a condition where my bone marrow doesn't produce enough blood cells, and I have no meds to help me, what are the chances of finding a pharmacy? A pharmacy where it has all the things I need to survive?” You spat, frustration filling your mind like hot liquid.

“Denise can help you, Y/n, you have seen her efforts in helping you,” You can sense Rick’s desperation to get you back to Alexandria’s infirmary. His voice remained gentle but firm.

“Why, Rick?” Your eyes stared into Rick's ocean blue orbs, frustration, and confusion, “I’m not strong, anymore. I can’t go on runs, anymore. I can’t protect anyone.”

“Because we still need you—“

“Maybe it’s you who still needs me, Rick…” You spat, leaning your head on the wood as you got the strength to finally stand up, with the support of the tree, of course.

“Y/n we can discuss this once we get back,” Rick sighed, coming closer to you as he held both your arms gently.

A rush of adrenaline painfully scours into your veins as you push him away with all the remaining strength you have.

“GODDAMNIT RICK, WHY CANT YOU JUST LET ME DIE OUT THERE!” You yelled at him. “YOU KNEW I WAS GOING TO BE A BURDEN AND YOU SAW HOW MANY PILLS I HAD ON THE TABLE!”

Rick scoffed, “You're giving up now? After all that has happened? The prison, terminus… and you decide to end it all here? Where we’re finally safe?” His tone wasn’t as gentle but it was now harsher, deeper.

“if you think more treatments, will change anything, it won’t. I'm done and I won't let you guilt me into continuing this charade.”

“then what’re you gon’ tell Carl, hm? That you’re sick of bein’ alive so now you’re gonna leave?”

“This isn’t about Carl, Rick it’s about you keeping me to fill in the gap of what Lori gave you,” you glare with poison in your very eyes. “Leaving you to care for a child that was never yours.”

Rick went quiet, as you realized what you had said, “i-I’m sorry… Rick…” you pleaded, holding his hands.

Rick sighed, “Maybe you're right."

You nodded, your breath becoming shorter as your legs finally give in. You feel your body starting to shut down. Rick helped you sit down comfortably on the ground. You were paler and had many bruises on your arms and legs. You were heating up again.

“I'm sorry, Rick,” you breathed heavily, clutching the hand he gave you.

“It’s okay, Y/n,” Rick comforted you, kissing her knuckles as her legs trembled. Rick’s voice was shaky, almost labored.

“I don’t wanna turn, you can ask Daryl to keep my gun, you’ll need it,” You softly chuckled. Rick looked at you, taking his revolver from his holster.

“Get back to Alexandria, to Judith…” you smiled as you felt bile in your throat, blocking your airway and your heartbeat becoming more abnormal.

Rick gives you a final kiss on the head as an act of kindness and comfort on the edge of a quick and painless death.

—————————————————————

a/n: Hello everyone! This is my very first Fanfic and I thought about it on the spot 😭 Reading it for me makes me kinda cringe but don’t we all? Anyways hope you guys enjoyed it (cuz I didn’t but I’m a sucker for tragic love)

[pastelwitchling]

Thoughts on Percy Jackson and the Olympians, episode 3:

(Disclaimer: I loved everything about the episode except, mostly, Annabeth herself. So if you're going to get offended because someone doesn't like the same fictional character, because that's what Annabeth is, and if you're going to try to turn the argument into something else, please don't bother reading.)

So. This is a bit difficult because I feel very conflicted/wary about what's to come, mostly because Disney has not been historically good at girl power or badass female characters. Let me just say this; while I used to love the CW's Flash, it quickly went downhill when the Flash took a backseat to his own show for the CW's half-assed "girl power" message. I fear the same might happen here.

Let me be very clear about something. It makes sense why Annabeth would seem like the more formidable opponent at the start of the story. She was more or less that in the first two books because, not only is she the daughter of the goddess of wisdom and battle strategy, but she'd spent a lot of her life training for quests, studying about the gods, and she just knew more than Percy did. I didn't like Movie Annabeth for most of the first film either for the same reasons I'm about to list below, please keep that in mind.

My issue will come here; if Percy starts to take a backseat to his own show just so we can highlight how great and awesome Annabeth is and girl power rules and whatever, I'm going to be very, very miffed. Again, it's fair for me to worry about this now because Disney is all tell and no show when it comes to women. Just like they did with Marvel, just like they did with the most recent Disney Princesses, it's more important to them to show how woke they are instead of caring about the actual stories they tell. And I'm Middle-Eastern, so don't even try any of that self-righteous white woman racial crap with me, okay?

I know I'm saying what a lot of people probably think but aren't allowed to say, but -- call me crazy -- I want the show based on the Percy Jackson books to focus on Percy Jackson. To be honest, I've never loved ANY of Rick Riordan's female characters, save for Ana from Daughter of the Deep, as well as the other female characters in that book, but that's not even in the Percy Jackson world, so it doesn't count. And I ONLY say this now because, again, Disney has SUCKED with their female characters. It's all pandering and nothing but pandering.

The first book especially always frustrated me with the way Grover never really seemed to defend Percy against Annabeth's snobby behavior, so this aligns fine. I'm not really saying anything against the character either (not yet), as this frustration with how unfair and snobby she is towards Percy very much aligns with the book. I guess I was just hoping that since I always hated Annabeth in the books and she was actually likable in the second episode, that maybe the show would be better about her portrayal. I was actually thinking how cute they would be as a couple in the second episode, but now? I'm kind of back where I was with the books, I don't see why she deserves him, not yet.

Much like Grover was in the episode, I was just looking at a lot of her behavior as Really? The guy had NO reason to invite you on this quest, you NEEDED him to pick you, and you still act like he's the idiot for caring about his mom and not knowing anything about this world that he's just found out about, and it's so freaking entitled, I --

I've been part of the Roswell, New Mexico fandom since season 1, and I know just how ridiculous people get when you DARE criticize a character who HAPPENS to be played by a black actress. I don't give a crap. I'm critiquing the CHARACTER here, and I'm disappointed, not with her, but the writing itself. It's too soon to tell, I know, but I do hope Disney is better about Annabeth's character than the books were, because I saw Book Annabeth as rude, selfish, and unfair, it bothered me that everyone in the story still idolized her despite how toxic her behavior was (save for Percy, but just in the beginning, and then he was fine with her hitting him and calling him stupid all the time), and I saw glimpses of that in episode 3, so I'm hoping for better.

Also, that whole, What are you afraid of? conversation felt so weird and forced. They JUST started the quest, Percy is throwing in suggestions, Annabeth treats him like he's stupid for it, and then demands to know why he's scared of who he is, and I'm like ?? What warranted that question? He hasn't used his powers yet, he hasn't refused to use his powers yet or talk about his father or anything, so why would he seem afraid of who he is? It just makes no sense.

Honestly? At this point, I just feel bad for Leah because Annabeth is a very difficult character to make likable in my eyes, and it's made worse when the writing won't allow her to be any better.

Aside from that, I really did love the episode a lot. I wish Grover had done more to defend Percy in the beginning, but he did the same thing in the book and he eventually did step in. Medusa was actually great. I hated the actress's character in the Flash, so I was wary, but she really knocked it out of the park. I love some of the extra details they put in, like Percy giving her a chance because of his mom and kindness (fatal flaw, if you know you know), I LOVED the consensus song, and YES! I was SO worried they wouldn't have Percy send Medusa's head to Olympus, but they did and he was perfect and it was AMAZING! When Annabeth said that what Medusa said isn't what happened, I would've liked an explanation of what actually did happen. Then again, it feels like there's a bit too much exposition already, to be honest. Like there were more creative ways to explain Thalia, there were more creative ways to explain Annabeth and Luke finding camp, and I don't know if it's because I've memorized the books at this point, but it feels like so much of the episode is just dedicated to explaining things that don't really need explanation or could be saved for later to show through flashbacks or something. I don't know, just more creative than standing and sitting there while someone explains everything.

It works great sometimes, like with Sally and Percy, but other moments just feel very... exposition-y.

I love this show. It's the highlight of my week. I maintain that we are getting the best possible adaptation. It's just because I love this story so much and it's so sacred to me that I can't help but critique. I don't think the books are flawless (i.e. the female characters), so it stands to reason that I won't find the show completely flawless either. Is it still sacred to me? Absolutely. Percy Jackson has always been too important not to nitpick, I think.

[hiro--aoki]

This Devil Doesn't Bargain

A/N: I'm trying to get the Rosita fic out but I don't know how to end it. @far-cry-from-finality do you have any specific fluff moments that you think Rosita and reader should have? Give me some options plz 🙏😭 While I struggle with my brainfarts, enjoy a short Carl fic, I wrote while camping a month or so back.

Tw: Reader and Carl arguing. a bit of angst :3. More for fem reader but can be male if you squint ig

------------------------------------------------------

You rummage around your shared room, throwing loose clothes and other random things you might need, into your duffel bag. You move quickly in hopes to leave before any of the Grimes come home, knowing they'll try and succeed in stopping you and your self appointed mission whether it be Rick, Michonne or especially Carl.

You toss the bag onto the bed and zip it up, before clipping your holster around your thigh and securing your revolver in it. You then sling the duffel bag over your shoulder and quickly go down the stairs. In your rush to the kitchen, halfway down the stairs, you trip, and are caught by none other than Carl Grimes.

"C-carl! I uh, I was just..."

You pull away from him, stumbling over your words as you try to come up with an excuse. You're silenced by Carl's hand.

"You're a terrible liar, y/n."

You look at the ground, in defeat, not even trying to hide the duffel bag.

"What were you doing and why were you doing it alone?" He said in a tone that basically says 'Don't even try to lie to me'.

You mumble something inaudible under your breath. Carl's hand lifts your chin to look at him as his ocean eye search yours for an answer but only finding guilt.

"Louder, y/n," He demands, not breaking eye contact.

"I was going to the Sanctuary," You say again, with more confidence, "And you can't convince me not to!"

"Are you crazy?! Why would you want to go there?!" Carl says, more confused than anything but the anger is still there.

"I'm going to negotiate with Negan. To leave us alone, or at least to take less stuff from us." You reply, trying to act casual about it, like you did this kind of stuff everyday. You did not.

"Negan?! You're sounding more insane by the second, y/n. Are you feeling okay? You can't go to the Sanctuary!" He pressed his hand against your forehead.

You swat away his hand, "I'm fine! Stop babying me! I can handle myself, Carl."

"Not against Negan! You saw what he did to Glenn and Abraham! And Daryl too!"

"It's worth a shot! If he keeps taking things at this rate, we'll be left with nothing! And violence won't solve this, so don't even offer that!" You counter.

"Well, he won't listen to reasoning!" He snaps back.

"We haven't tried! All we did was go and kill a whole bunch of Saviors and look what happened!"

"Why are you defending him?!"

"I'm not defending him! I'm just trying not to get anymore of us killed! I can't go through that again, neither can you and neither can anyone else here! You have to let me try, Carl, please."

"No! You'll get yourself killed, y/n, and no-one could go through losing you." He puts his hands on your shoulders.

"I have to try, Carl, because no-one else will!"You push past him and walk out of the house.

Carl's one eye follows you out of the house as he doesn't know what to do. He's never seen you so determined before, but he's certain about one thing: This devil doesn't bargain.

[glassfullofsass]

i have done...so much. this weekend. i am worn the fuck out and as a bonus my hands are torn up. all i want to do is lay on the couch and watch something but i'm caught up on everything i actually want to watch so lets Finally actually talk about 1.07 Root Systems (click here for notes on other episodes)

Krejjh is a little annoyed with Sana and it's interesting to get that dynamic, when Krejjh is famously chill af

Sana is still stressed :) this is fine

Shit, a coffin? gets me every time.

Violet does sound fucking horrible and may I AGAIN remind us that they are, at this point at least 3 weeks out from freeing the swarm, like. how is brian the only one with long term effects?

Sana self soothing again before calling Ricky Q. I am so normal.

I have to say there is a certain satisfaction in Rick Q being not just a privileged jackass, but a stupid privileged jackass that can't read the room. buddy. Sana is not playing. She hates your fucking guts.

The timing of the Agent voiceovers and report corrections and the IGR trying to get to the ship while it's on Hafiza is so weird. There has to be a delay in transmission, but then there's also time for the upper echelon to make corrections? IDK. it's handwavy storytelling necessity I suppose.

This is where Park decides that McCabe might be an annoying baby agent with a desperate need for approval, but they're his annoying baby agent with a desperate need for approval, damnit.

there is petty drama between Major General J. Fredrick and General Jahansooz and i need it to cause problems for the regime in season 3 please and thank you

the transcript notes are sending me re: Park affirming that the landing coordinates are unavailable "or if they simply decided on this occasion that incorporating a long string of numbers did not adhere to their sense of (God, does he hate his job) personal style."

"starting to lose his cool" bestie, Park is ready to take out someone's throat

queer flailing

high five for morale

some early practice for Arkady at stepping into Sana's role, love it

Sana finally talking about her stress, even if she is talking around it, love to see it

Arkady

krejjh truly is the shipper representation we need in the world

also i'm glad they get to know that Arkady took their "stupidest advice" after all

god ricky is such a fucking slime bag

I love annoyed McCabe they're so cute

Arkady

I assume Arkady is referencing Mojisola Adebayo. I don't know who Omar is a reference to, assuming it's an actual reference and not a "we said a bunch of real names and made one up since there's a huge jump from when you're listening to when the story is set" there is a Uruguayan playwright that it might be, but idk

god ricky q is so fucking full of himself

I genuinely can't tell what's going on with Park's attitude when he mentions Edict 1837, except that maybe he's not the one that has to do the research and whoever does have to do it has pissed him off

Pretty sure this is the moment that spawned Saint Sana; she says she has to do things she's not proud of, that it's how she keeps her crew alive, she puts all the pieces together, and she doxes Ricky in this very bittersweet but committed moment that's just...Who can do it like her?

if i start talking about the lenny speech i'm just going to type the whole thing word for word

no for real like i actually would need to write a separate post and maybe four more fics to even begin breaking down that speech.

i am ace. i am aro. but god damn that speech is hot.

the drama, the tension, the heartfelt aspirational space rebellion. alexa, play The Ballad of Serenity

how the FUCK is the regime now Real Time with the crew? I do not understand.

the time skips so fast i forgot they were down to 4 minutes? I thought Sana gave a much longer time limit than she actually needed

Park defending McCabe when he doesn't know it's him the Major General is there for anyways😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I thought it was interesting that they ID'd Fear for the Storm almost immediately, but not the song played earlier, but if it's an older song, then I guess that makes sense (the language difference really shouldn't matter)

[enid-rhees]

please can you write something for Tara? maybe an argument that ends in a love confession? 🩷 sorry I don’t have many good ideas but I love your writing

oh god i love Tara so much. tysm for requesting!! hope you enjoy <3 and this is an amazing request dont apologize! and tysm 🫶🏻

warnings: arguing, slightly suggestive.

a/n: hope you all enjoy! requests are currently closed but will be opened again very soon 🫶🏻! this is a bit short but i hope that is okay!

it had been two hours since you came back home just to discover that Tara wasn’t there. she never left the house without telling you. even if it was just a small run that would take an hour max, she always told you.

you asked Rosita, Glenn, Eugene, everyone, and no one had known where she had gone. your mind was racing a million miles a second with possibilities you didn’t even want to think about.

Tara meant everything to you. it had been around five months since you and your group made it to Alexandria. but before that, you and Tara met in the train cart at Terminus. you were with Rick, Carl, Michonne and Daryl.

the two of you got along quickly, mostly due to one thing: you both liked girls. you figured her out quickly, when you watched the way she watched Rosita. and with you, she just… knew.

you followed her when Eugene needed to get to Washington, well, before he lied about even being a scientist and knew a “cure”. the entire journey brought you guys closer. so when Aaron appeared and offered your group to live in Alexandria, you guys decided to live together.

as the months went by, you felt your feelings for Tara grow more and more. it was hard to keep it in, you wished you were able to tell her, and just spit it out finally.

you weren’t sure what was stopping you, because all you wanted was to finally call Tara yours, or be able to wake up in the morning and see her next to you, or just be able to finally kiss her. you’ve dreamt of it too much.

your leg shook under the coffee table as you sat with your head in your hands. this wasn’t like Tara, at all. she always, always told you where she was going. always.

this was killing you. not knowing if she was okay or not. not knowing if she’s gotten hurt, and is stranded somewhere where she’s defenseless, or if she’s gotten bit-

the front door opened.

Tara stepped inside, taking her shoes off and hanging her hoodie like it was nothing. you stood up and ran to her, “where the fuck did you go?!” you yelled.

her eyes widened as she took a step back. “i just went to the pharmacy a few miles down…”

“why the fuck didn’t you tell me? or anyone?! i was worried sick about you, Tara!” her face was full of confusion, not knowing why you were so upset at her.

“i-i didn’t think it was a big deal. i wasn’t gone that long, Y/N. i’m fine!” she defended. “but what if you weren’t?! i mean- what if you got hurt, Tara? you always tell me when you’re leaving. do you know how worried i was to come home and see that you’re gone? and when i asked everyone where you were, none of them knew. do you not know how scary that was?”

tears ran down your cheeks and you quickly wiped them away. you didn’t want to cry over this, but nothing had truly frightened you like this. losing Tara is something you try your hardest to avoid thinking about at all times.

“Y/N- i’m sorry, okay? i know i always tell you when i’m leaving, but all i needed was one thing. i don’t understand why you’re so mad-“

“because i’m in love with you!” you yelled, causing her to freeze. “i mean- fuck Tara! i’m so in love with you, and i can’t fucking hide that anymore. you’re everything to me. just the smallest thought of you getting hurt scares the shit out of me. i can’t imagine how i could ever live with myself if you’ve ever gotten hurt somehow. i can’t do this without-“

Tara lunged forward, smashing her lips onto yours. she held on tightly to your waist, pulling you impossibly closer to her as you kissed her back just as hard. your hands wrapped around her neck, not even leaving a millimeter of space between the two of you.

you pulled away briefly, but you immediately dove back into each other, unable to get enough of each other. one of your hands tangled itself into her hair, and she moaned into your mouth at the feeling.

Tara moved forward until you were pressed against the wall behind you. the deep kiss continued until you were both out of your breath. she leaned her head on yours as you caught your breath, still holding onto you tightly.

“i can’t lose you.” you whispered breathlessly. she nodded, “i know, i can’t lose you either. i’m sorry for leaving like that without saying anything.”

you shook your head, pulling her into another kiss. your head hit the wall when she suddenly brought her head down to your neck, bringing you nothing but complete bliss.