#and other people are out here doing things and here i am having a fucking breakdown over having a problem with a personal art project

[imjunebitch]

Hi. My name is Lili, I'm also a trans woman. I'm reaching out in good faith because I really really fear you might be heading down a dangerous ideological path by being a trans woman that gives credence to the term 'transandrophobia'

I'm not sure how I could truly convey that you are aligning yourself with terfs and other reactionaries, and these people will toss you in the trash the moment you stop being a useful dancing pony for them. These people will demand that you hate yourself for being a trans woman, they will demand that you agree with them when other trans women are harassed and unpersoned. They will demand that you make yourself small, and it may take years for the psychological toll to fully unravel for you.

Frankly, I was going to just block you, and move on, but you're Miku pfp demanded that I at least try to warn you. Miku is transfeminist, and it's a bit concerning to see someone sporting Her as a pfp and not realize that.

I'll quit rambling, and tbh, I hope I'm wrong. I hope that you are never subjected to the things I described. I would like to be proven wrong about all of them.

be careful though, maybe my message today will make more sense as time goes on.

hi! ill start with the single kind thing i think I can possibly say to u! I was kinda miffed by those condescending anonymous asks, and I'm incredibly grateful that this ask, while condescending, is not anonymous! and thanks for that! shows u have a little conviction, even tho u are wrong.

ill just address your "points" in order. probably easier to read.

yes, okay, im a trans girl. yes I think transandrophobia exists or I "lend credence" to the idea or whatever. this is ideology to u? that's interesting. my acknowledgement is less based in any specific theory or ideology, admittedly, and more in observing the world and the people around me. for example, I am close friends, both irl, and online, with quite a few transmascs and men. i can see, with my eyes, the way they are treated. and do you know what I've seen? its every single bit as fucking bad as the way trans women and fems are treated, jerk! and on top of that now they have to worry about attacks from within their own community? from assholes like you? Jesus Christ you people are insufferable!!! i fucking love transmascs! as friends, allies, found family, and a boyfriend now, somehow, im super lucky, and I can fucking see the way they are demonized inside and outside of the queer community. treated as men only when it can be a justification for hurting them and treated as stupid and misguided otherwise. it makes my blood boil knowing that they are subject to this mistreatment, and that people like u don't care. that u sit around and discuss your intersexist exclusionary theories and sneer at your closest allies. that u spend the time writing this ask out to warn me, a non-passing tgirl, of the dangers of the scaaary trans men as if u wouldn't see me as a man if u saw me on the street and didn't know anyway. knowing that u look down on my wonderful and sweet partners for the crime of not presenting the way u do, and not experiencing your exact experience. it DISGUSTS me. YOU disgust me.

i think we're doing good work here! point two!

oh it looks like the second point is just "Jesus Christ how fucking dare u." huh. genuinely tho, how dare u? how dare u act like trans men wanting a term to discuss their own oppression is in any way anything like a TERF? ur the fucking TRF my friend. toss me in the trash? dancing pony? tf are u on about? do u understand that I am not doing this for approval? im doing this bc I think it's right to stand up for people I love and just to be good to people in general! how fucking dare u act like ive been fucking brainwashed by transmascs into showing men the common courtesy u show human beings! the people i talk to now, which includes a fair amount of trans women actually, shithead, are incredibly accepting of me, bc, unlike u, they aren't prejudiced against a massive chunk of trans ppl for existing! they actually respect them! are there bad people on my side of "transandrophobia discourse?" sure! fine! but dawg, your side has fucking soup-mother. your side has plaidos. your side is fine with calling nonbinary people slurs that originated on four chan. your side quashes gnc and intersex transfems voices. your side uses a terminology that inherently acts like intersex people are acceptable collateral damage to ensure that ur oppression is the source of all other oppression in ur own mind. your side is, actually not only far less accepting of transmascs, but it is horrifyingly willing to mistreat transfems. the singular thing u pretend to care about.

and also my personal beliefs used to be closer to yours, back when I was far more stupid and self involved. i fucking got over myself. I had just figured out I was trans. i was lonely and scared and also seventeen, altho I'm only eighteen now. and it still took me less than a week to realize the horseshit ppl like u pedal is horseshit. the fuck's ur excuse?

PLEASE just block me Jesus Christ. i agree. Miku is a transfeminist. as am i. Miku loves trans people. i do as well. i don't think u do. i think u love urself, and the people ur willing to relate to. i think u won't extend compassion beyond that which u can relate to and I think that's a vile disturbing and bigoted way of looking at the world. block me. i hope someday that u become a better person so the person u are now fills u with shame and remorse. and I hope u stay the fuck away from trans men and mascs, altho they're used to being mistreated by other trans ppl now, thanks to shitheads like u. i certainly hope u stay the FUCK away from recently out trans women bc ur poison ideology is most likely to hurt them.

[darklucielle]

Breaking her

StayC Isa x Manager POV

Tags: Gangbang, Degradation, Violence, Drugs, Masturbation

I got a call from by the High Up's CEO at his office. He said that he wanted to talk about Isa's attitude problem.

"Sir. I tried my best. I told her that her attitude affects everything in STAYC. She still didn't listen."

"I know you did your best. Maybe solving this problem in just talks is not the best way. I need to think if terminating her contract will solve the problem."

"Kicking her out of the group, sir?"

"Yeah. we don't have a choice. don't we? Isa is valueable asset in the group. Pretty and talented but her attitude now is not helping the group at all. She isn't like that before. Fame got her."

"I have a plan, sir. But first, I need your approval."

"You do? Well... I'm listening."

I told the CEO about my plan. I planned to take this further. Through violence and sexual humilation, Just to teach her a lesson. The CEO stayed silent for a while then nods.

"Alright. Do what you want. I'll make sure there will be no evidences of this."

"Thank you, Sir."

NEXT DAY

Another rehearsal for their upcoming fanconcert. They're working hard.... except her.

Sieun scolded her for being late then intentionally messing things up. They took a break right after. Isa went to the corner of the practice room and starts doing whatever she does on her phone.

That's it. That's the cue.

I went towards to her then grabbed her phone away from her hands. Before she can even react, A slap strikes her cheek. It was so loud that the rest of the STAYC members froze. They're shocked that I slapped her.

"WHAT THE FUCK!? HOW COULD YOU..."

Another slap. It made her fell down to the floor. I gripped tight her hair then keeps slapping her face. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six times a row.

The members are still stucked on their place. They don't dare to come and rescue their crying member.

"Look at me, You bitch." I snarled. Yanking down her hair then my other hand grips her face roughly to look at my eyes.

"I had enough of your bitchy attitude. Everyone had enough. Your members, staffs and even CEO. If you wanted to stay as an idol and member of STAYC, Accept your consequences and learn your damn lesson."

Without waiting for her answer, I pulled her up. Making her stand then dragged her out of the practice room.

"Arghh! Manager-nim! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" She pleads. She keeps sobbing hard as I dragged her out.

It's hard to drag a sobbing mess along the way but after a while, I finally arrived at the men's bathroom. I kicked the door open then pushed her down to the tile floor.

Pulled out a tape from my pocket then forcefully tapes her wrists together. Does the same on her ankles.

I pulled out my phone and called someone. Isa heard me calling for some people here. "Manager-nim! I'm so sorry, Truly I am! I promise to be good person now! I will practice along with the members! Please have mercy!"

"It's too late now. No one will come and save you here. Your members are too scared. You're on your own."

Moments later, Someone knocked the door. I opened it and five High Up male staffs went inside.

"Are you sure about this?"

"Yeah. I got a green light from the CEO. Do whatever you all want to her. That will teach her a lesson." I said.

"No! No! Please! Have mercy! Don't do this please! I swear I'll behave!"

Nods at them to start Isa's punishment. The sight of Isa being tied-up and helpless, Surely it turns them on. They all removed their pants and let their raging cocks loose. They walked towards to her like a bunch of hungry hyenas.

"No!! Please!! Stop! Stop!" She cried but still can't do anything to defend herself. Two guys went to tore her shirt to expose Isa's bare breasts. Not big nor small, Just perfect size for her body. These two guys are busy pinching her nipples roughly as they gave her delicate skin some bite marks.

Other two went tore her pants apart to expose her thighs. I guess they're too hunrgy for her. Last one went to her feet and sucking her toes. Obviously loving it.

Isa doesn't have a choice but to scream for help. Her voice became ragged from shouting. The first pair are now suckling her nipples.

"No... stop... stop biting my nipples.." her voice became weaker and weaker.

They bit and trying to pull it out. They did it many times before they went to forcefully kissed her lips. Isa doesn't want to as she keeps her mouth shut but the two men are too eager to taste her mouth.

As they succeed invading her mouth. They took turns of violating her mouth. They even licked her whole face. Making Isa feel disgusted.

Second pair decided to feast at her holes. First one went to devour Isa's wet cunt while the other one is busy at her ass.

The last one took advantage of the situation by using her feet to jerk off his cock.

The first pair stopped kissing her lips and proceeds to make her suck their cocks. She still resisting but the two are too determined to break her defenses.

Finally, they're able to fuck Isa's mouth. They're facefucking her like there's no tomorrow. Harsh and messy. Her saliva leaking from her mouth and drips down to her breasts. Creating a slimy mess on her own body. They took turns of abusing her mouth and throat. They don't care about her at all. They don't care about her as an Idol. To them, Isa is their fleshlight. Their cum dumpster.

The sounds of skin slapping skin and lewd noises from her own mouth fills the whole room.

The fourth guy who's busy eating her ass, starts putting his cock between Isa's thighs and maniacally thrusting it. The third guy puts two fingers inside Isa's tight virgin pussy and fingering her roughly.

The first pair decided that they should put their cocks inside her mouth at the same time. Surprisingly, it fits. Together, they fucked her mouth in that way.

Seeing Isa surrenders and just let these horny men do whatever they want to her body, makes this mission successful.

She's now broken, mess and violated. Surely she learned her lesson now, isn't she?

The third guy keeps fingering her pussy until Isa squirts. Her whole body twitches a lot.

"Damn! She squirts like a fountain!"

"Please.... no... more...." her voice muffled because of the two cocks thrusting inside her mouth.

The last guy keeps using her feet as his fleshlight until he came a lot. The first pair simutaneously shoots cum in her mouth. The overwhelming amount and taste makes Isa gagged but she doesn't have a choice but to swallow it.

The second pair forced their cocks into her wet cunt and tight butthole. It made her scream out loud but still ragged. It took them a while before theit entire length pushed inside of her. They started to thrust hard and deep.

The sensation of two cocks tearing her inside apart, filling her up and simutaneously violating her surely it's too much for her to handle. All she can do is to cry and beg.

It didn't take long until they filled her insides. I looked at my watch and it took over an hour to finish.

"Gentlemen. This needs to be finished by a golden shower."

They nodded in unison. They proceed to piss Isa's face and body. Degrading her to the lowest point.

To these men, they're all spent but overly satisfied. The idol that they used to admire, now a weeping mess on the bathroom's floor. Clothes torned apart, Her face and body are forcefully used for sexual desires, Her dignity is broken, Her precious virginity is now lost. She's coated by a mixture of sweat, saliva, piss, blood and cum.

But my job is not done. I pulled out my phone and turns the phone camera to her. I pulled her up by her hair.

"Wake the fuck up, Bitch. Answer my questions. Understood?"

She weakly nodded. "Yes....."

"Tell me your name. Your full real name."

"Lee.... Chae-young..."

"Why are you here and suffering?"

"Because..... I was rude.. to everyone. It's all... my fault... I deserved... this..."

"What lesson did you earn from your punishment?"

"Not to be... rude to everyone... I'll be... behave and helping the... group more...."

"This won't be the last time, Isa. Get ready."

FEW DAYS LATER

After the successful fanconcert. They all went to their dorms except her. I told her to follow me to the vocal rooms where I pushed her to enter.

"Why are we here, manager-nim?"

"Strip off your clothes. Everything. Everyone is watching you." Points at the web camera of the PC.

It didn't take long until she's all bare naked. I pulled out a syringe and a small vial of the strongest aphrodisiac. Immediately shots at her forearm.

It didn't take long until she got the effect of the aphrodisiac. She felt hot and horny as she starts touching herself infront of the camera. I pulled out some sex toys for her to use.

Behind the web camera, The people watching her pleasuring herself is the CEO, Executives, Shareholders and even CEOs from the other companies.

They all watched how an seemingly innocent idol turned into a slut.

The members of STAYC swore that they will be quiet about Isa getting sexually abused. The Isa that they used to know is back and they're happy about it.

-End-

[j3lly-fish]

Hey everyone, I am only now seeing all this because I was at work, sorry about that.

Quite frankly, I don't have the energy to deal with this, nor do I honestly think I should be giving any of these people any attention. I am making one post and calling it a day.

My cc is made from scratch, I make this very clear in every post description. Please read them.

If at any point I've used a mesh that did not belong to me, I check the TOU and make sure its okay to post, and the person is credited.

If I get any sort of inspiration from something or someone, I tend to mention that in my description as well, notably the star jelly earrings that were from a shop called Tsuki Blade on etsy.

I make cc that I want to see or use in my game. That's my entire thought process. That is it. If for some reason, you believe I go out of my way to steal people's designs or meshes, let me remind you that my cc is free, and that I, in no way shape or form, would even benefit from that concept.

I started making meshes because I eventually wanted my skill to be good enough to mesh the ears of a character that is very dear to me. Then that got claimed as a mesh edit. I found a cute pair of earrings on etsy and found it sad to only post one pair, so I made a last minute set by playing around with the hoops and other assets that were already in that initial pair of earrings. That then got claimed as a stolen design/mesh.

I want it on the record. This kind of nitpicking bullshit is exactly what drives creators away from this community. You CONSTANTLY complain about how there's too much beigecore, too much y2k, but when you finally get a creator that has a bit more of the creative bone you look for, you make sure they lose every ounce of motivation and passion that goes into their FREE CONTENT, and then wonder why you're back to square one. I'm not even speaking on my behalf here, this is just a casual thing that happens on here way too fucking often. Creators give these things for you for free, and having the nerve to whine about two cakes is baffling to me.

To the person who made that post. I have never seen you or spoken to you in my 23 years of existence. So leave me the fuck alone, or so help me god.

If you guys do not like my content, block me. It is literally as simple as that.

Thanks.

[transgenderpussycat]

While it is true that there can be risks to black market testosterone, it is not as dangerous as you make it out to be.

There is a really big market for testosterone used in doping, therefore there is also a lot of competition. So the companies making illegal T are constantly competing to make the best product, and if a supplier fucks up their product they would quickly loose their customers since there are so many alternative suppliers. On top of that, testosterone (and estrogen too) are relativity cheap to produce so there really is no reason for suppliers to mix the hormone with any other potentially harmfull substance to save money, which sadly is a common practice with many other drugs like coke for example, but shouldnt be a concern here.

You are vastly exaggerating the dangers of testosterone. We all (schould)have both testosterone and estrogen in our bodies in varying amounts, they are part of what make our bodies function, so your body should already know how to respond to the hormone. yes you can technically have an allergic reaction to testosterone, but that is really unlikely, and in many cases the allergic reaction is to what the testosterone is mixed with, not the hormone itself (hormones like many other substances cant be taken in its raw form so you have to mix it with something to be able to inject it or use it as a gel).

Testosterone overdose sounds scary and it is not healthy, but HRT will not kill you, overdosing on testosterone is nothing like overdosing on narcotics.

A cis man taking testosterone and a trans man taking testosterone are also different things. If a cis man takes testosterone he is more likely to have too much testosterone in his body and experience negative side effects because his natural testosterone level is already at where i schould be (in most cases), so adding extra can quickly become to much. This is not the case for a trans man with naturally low levels of testosterone, who would need to take a much higher dose to risk negative side effects.

Please do your own reading about the negative effects of taking testosterone and taking too much of it instead of just listening to a random tumblr user saying that testosterone is dangerous and that you can od from it, and calling it extremely dangerous, withouth any evidence.

i cant speak for all countries, but in denmark if the police intercept a package of drugs being sent to you, you can just claim that you know nothing about it. technically anyone can mail drugs to a random stranger without their consent, so you can use that plausible deniability in your favor.

In my opinion the safest and most comfortable way to take diy hrt is to get involved in a trans community where you live(sadly this can be difficult if you dont live in a big city). often you can find many people who are diy'ing in local communities and then you can get advice and access to hormones via them. I find it to be very comforting that i am on estrogen from the same supplier as my friends and community members, so if anyone experiences any problems with the hormones i will hear about it.

Many places around the world trans people are also starting to produce, import, test and distribute their own HRT, in order to make it safer for their communities. these underground and above ground groups run by and for trans people to keep it safe are growing, so diy hrt is getting cheaper and safer.

I dont belive that diy hrt is a high risk endeavour. you need to be aware that the safety and risks involved with the treatment is your own responsibility, so you need to be smart about it. However i dont see a reason to be so scared about diy, just think twice and you should be good.

by the way, trans harm reduction are really great! check them out, especially if you're in Ireland.

In these trying times I have to tap the sign once again: (courtesy of Reddit user)

[dykeharris]

proof that andrew was not "a man that just had autogynephillia"

i am a sweet girl but i fucking hate transphobes!!! yall make me act like my dad!!!!

"i can't describe that desire to go. the desire to be a woman again, the desire to just get out of this body and out of this world.

clearly her describing that she feels like a woman and believes that she will be a woman again when she dies!!!! it is obvious she had gender dysphoria - pretty extreme gender dysphoria, honestly.

"why am i damned to spend too to three decades in this disgusting body?? i'm not a man. sorry mom and dad, but i'm not sorry, i'm a fucking woman."

oh but andrews just a man with a fetish right ?!?!? yall (andrew haters) sound so retarded

exhibit c: her ghost persona who is very obviously a woman!!

no this isnt mackenzie but i do understand the confusion! they both have purpleish eyes, purple accents in their clothes and purple outlines.. andrew designed them awfully similar. pro tip: andrew blaze has indigo eyes and a blue fire symbol on her shirt

heres a picture of andrew & mackenzie together for reference!

unfortunately there is a limit to one video per post on tumblr. utter bullshit, but alas...

quote from suicide tape #9 "the drive (02)" at 30:06 ... "but then it goes back to, y'know, i'm a female soul. i'm a girl. girls don't look like that."

here andrew discusses her weight and how women are usually thinner, (she'd be surprised to meet me-) which she compares to the fact that she is very underweight herself.

read andrew's journal here!

"i had no idea she was this depressed."

this is probably the most damning evidence i've seen regarding andrew's identity. when pretending to speak as her mother, she refers to herself with she pronouns. yeah "andrew was a man" antis i'd love to see you explain this one

"i want to chop my penis off so bad ... to have my pussy and breasts back."

a bit vulgar but who gaf shes a grown ass woman . just more proof that she saw herself as female and believed that when she would die she would take the form of a female. textbook signs of gender dysphoria

"i guess the proper term would be 'transgender' but i don't even fully agree on that ... i'm legit a girl trapped inside a boy's body. i'm a feminine soul."

the line that stupid bitch took out of context to tell me andrew wasn't actually trans. trump, please don't make us pay for education, people are retarded enough as it is.

she didn't like the label transgender. which makes sense, i don't think andrew would've liked labels.

"...yet here i am in a filthy man's body seen as a 'dude.' i'm one of you (female), not a male."

first of all i am unsure why anyone would call her a pedophile considering she just turned 18 in 2010 but that's besides the point

i really don't know how any more obvious she can get. how many times does she have to say "i am a woman" for you idiots to get it. this also proves she was a massive dyke but we already knew that. lesbians win again!

"i can't take my eyes off the slim teenaged girls... i see them and think "why wasn't i born that way?"... i was destined to exist in a female's body."

more proof except this one's really upsetting and made me cry when i first saw it. i, being a cisgender woman, will never understand the hardship trans women go through but please know that i'm trying to understand your pain as much as possible and i love every single one of you.

i sort of understand this, as an incredibly insecure teenager i do look at other girls and think "why don't i look like them?" but at the end of the day, i still have female anatomy, i still go to sleep blessed that i am a woman and my body reflects that.

i think i'll continue this thought in a separate post

"there are some things a girl's heart just can't let go of."

referring to herself as a girl when talking about her friend's death.

.

.

.

EEEKKK okay i wrote this post on JUNE 6, it is now JULY 11... yeah i'm so sorry . i totally forgot about it KDSAKJSDANSADKDSA

it isn't finished but i feel like this is more than enough evidence to prove that andrew was in fact trans

so if you believe andrew was a man even after reading all this , then please block me!! :3 you're not welcome here

[urfavnewgirl]

BLÜDHAVEN. EIGHT PM.

“I am going to murder him. Stick one of his own arrows up his ass so he gets a taste of what betrayal truly feels like.”

“Your vulgarity is off the charts today, sweetheart.” You throw a pillow at him. He catches it, neatly places it on top of the singular bed in your shared hotel room.

You were meant to finish this job with Roy. After all, the two of you had started working on it together months ago, and everything had led up to this very moment in time. The next two days or so were meant to be simple, really: find the precise location of the drug lord you had been tracking and were finally able to identify, get familiar with his habits, and strike.

Except, never the reliable one, your red-haired friend had a “thing to deal with”, one that was supposedly “much more urgent” and thus, forced you to play through the perfectly planned grand finale with Jason fucking Todd, of all people.

Admittedly, you always worked well together, even when he was purely the Red Hood to you, a man clad in maroon and several layers of deflection. And yes, maybe your dislike for him has dwindled into a rather small flame compared to the bonfire it was at the beginning. Maybe he was sweet sometimes, even. But that didn't mean you were comfortable with your current predicament.

“You're taking the couch.”

He scoffs, eyes widening in disbelief. “And what makes you think I'm gonna agree to that?”

Wordlessly, you meet his gaze, then plop down on the bed, nuzzling into the covers. You know it's unfair of you. Jason is big. Ridiculously so. And the couch is tiny. He'd have to curl up into a ball to even fit on it, and you bite back a grin at the mental image. Let him suffer a little. You don't want to give in to a man this easily.

He squints at you, shakes his head. Similarly to you, he lets the moment pass by in silence. His stare alone is enough for you to pull the comforters completely over your head, and because he doesn't retort, you allow yourself to relax in the safety of your hiding place, your body limp.

That's when you feel it. One hand, large and calloused, slides under your knees, the other finds your upper back. He had touched you before, of course. It came with the job. You knew he ran warm. Except, right now, it was not the vigilante pulling you into an alley, hiding away from bad guys - it's Jason's gloveless skin on yours, and he's a damn furnace. He pulls you out from under the covers in a torturously slow, careful motion, mumbles “you leave me no choice”, and places you atop the dull-looking two-seater.

You wait for the goosebumps to disappear, for your vocal chords to realign themselves before you reply. And even then, it's a weak sound, half the air in your lungs absent, stolen by him. “...Asshole.”

He grins down at you, walks over to mimic your previous position on the bed. “At least I'm a comfortable asshole.”

You know he's right, and you know you can't do anything about it, not when your fatigued state robs you of your usual strength. So you merely shoot him the finger, turn the nightlamp on, and face the backrest of your less than lovely frame of cushions.

TEN PM.

“So, what are you reading, anyways?”

“Not talking to you right now.”

“And here I thought our relationship was getting better.”

“Fuck you, Todd.”

He laughs at that. His voice is deep, gravelly. It's a harsh sound that slices through the air, and you frown at the way it makes you feel. 

You turn the page, purposefully dragging the movement into an unnecessary length before shooting him the briefest of looks, your tone seeped in annoyance. “The Haunting of Hill House.”

There's a scoff of disbelief as you hear him shift on the bed, a pair of eyes digging into your back. “You brought a horror novel to a creepy motel?”

“Yes. Problem?”

“Do you ever read any other genre?”

Placing your book on the nightstand, you turn around to face him, the street lamps allowing in just enough light for you to make out the contours of his face. With his eyebrows set into a frown, glossy, wide eyes and the rest of his body hidden under pink covers, he almost looks cute. Almost.

“I do. Do you ever read anything other than Austen?”

“I do.”

“Yeah? Like what?”

“Like Frankenstein. Dracula, too.”

“But those are-”

His eyebrows raise, “Your favorites, yeah.”

“...sap.”

You turn around to hide your blush. So he had taken your recommendations, at the end of the day. There's something fuzzy blossoming right where your heart is at the realization. You wait for it to somewhat sizzle out, and then, quietly, speak.

“I read Emma, too. And Pride and Prejudice.”

Jason Todd catches himself smiling at your words, and he's glad you can't see his face.

ONE AM.

No rest for the wicked, and for those forced to lay on rock-hard couches in inexplicably cold motel rooms.

You've spent the last few hours in a statuesque state, unmoving, because you don't want to wake him, desperately trying to get your body to give in and fall asleep. One look at the time, however, is enough for you to finally take action.

With a frustrated sigh, you stumble into a somewhat upright position, nearly crawling over to the radiator. Your fingers find the knob, and when you realize it's rusted right into a non-functional mess, you have the urge to cry out loud, head in your hands, but he breaks the silence before you do.

“What the hell are you doing?”

You nearly tear your hair out at the question. “What does it look like I'm doing, Red? This room is worse than Antarctica.”

“'s not that bad.” 

“Yeah, because your body temperature runs way above average. Plus, your ass is on the bed. I'm pretty sure that sofa was made of actual ice.”

He sighs. Speaks, quietly. “So get in.”

You turn towards him fully, head tilted in confusion. “What?”

“The bed.”

“But–”

“Get. in. the. damn. bed.”

Not wanting to risk a repeat of his earlier actions (his big, strong arms, hauling you up, leaving you a blushing mess), you comply, hesitantly get into the bed. You make sure to leave enough space between you, your bodies separated by at least a foot. Even at a distance, you feel his warmth, but it is not enough to eradicate your shivering completely. 

It's only around two minutes later when you feel his arms wrap around your waist, pull you into the safety of his own form, and your chattering teeth finally come to a rest. His nose meets your neck, nuzzles into your shoulder, your hands run across his. This is the most physical contact you've ever had with him, and yet, it's not awkward - it feels almost as natural as breathing. You relax into it. So does he.

“Too stubborn for your own good.” He says, and you drift off to sleep with a grin plastered to your face.

EIGHT AM.

Your eyes flutter open, adjust to the light, yet when you try to move, you're pulled right back.

Seven hours have passed, and you don't know if it is due to the early morning sleepiness still lingering in the air, or for reasons you don't let your mind wonder about, but he refuses to let you go.

He shifts slightly, forehead against you, a groggy mumble hitting your skin. “Missions at nine. We've time.”

So you let him hold you for a little while longer, leave your actually awake self to deal with the consequences of your actions some other time.

-

can be read as pt. two to this

[according2thelore]

would u elaborate on why jared x dean is the best ship of all time I am SO intrigued 0v0

(from this post right here)

OKAY HAHAHA i was mostly joking! but now that i have your attention, i might spit some nonsense here for a second.

i think dean and jared would get along better than dean and jensen. do not tell jensen ackles i said that. i'm begging you. he'll cry. please do not make jensen ackles cry.

jared is very open and gregarious, and i could absolutely see dean being drawn to him for a quick game of cards or pool to sucker him out of a couple bucks in a dark bar in the middle of nowhere, because he looks dumb and floppy and makes dean harder than a fucking rock because he's got sammy's eyes.

and as everyone on this planet knows, jared is very good at poker. i think he won? a poker tournament? i'm probably making that up? and once jared takes him for what he's worth, now dean is TWICE as hard.

idk. i think dean doesn't have a lot of people in his life that can make him laugh--genuinely laugh--and i think jared's humor is just stupid enough to do it. dean absolutely thinks he's a bit of a prissy-boy, but dean thinks anyone who doesn't know what drowner guts tastes like is a pussy, so what does he know?

i think dean would be fascinated by someone so tall and so big being so outwardly funny and personable and generous. dean comes from a very toxic masculine, knife-in-one-hand-while-you-shake-with-your-other kind of world, and height and weight are deadly.

jared also has this thing he does where he makes the men around him super secure and excited about their masculinity, and dean would absolutely get addicted to that feeling [see: jared interacting with any man, but i’m in particular thinking about him and keegan allen tangled up on that boat and taking each other’s shots/drinks]

we also know how dean feels about bigger, scruffy, masculine men, lmao. plus, jared played walker, a model of The American Cowboy…dean’s jokingly asking to see his cowboy hat and then ripping a hole in the crotch of his jeans with his teeth.

sam and jensen are both a little quieter, and i think jared and dean would get along like a house on fire.

i'm talking shots, i'm talking joyriding, i'm talking blowjobs in bathroom stalls, i'm talking manhandling, i'm talking wrestling because you're alive and there's the most beautiful boy in the world sitting next to you and you have to touch him.

they're both loud and take up space because they feel like they kind of have to? but they're also both painfully earnest, and incredibly smart, and very insightful.

dean is someone who hides a lot of his insecurity and depression behind jokes, sarcasm, and a comical verve for life...sound a little familiar?

idk--i feel like they have a lot in common!

jared is very pretty-boy fraternity brother, and the only thing keeping dean from pretty-boy frat-hood is a college admission, you get me?

dean is a hopeless romantic (argue w the wall), and jared sits on the ground and stares up at you with big eyes when you talk because he thinks you're beautiful and loves listening to you speak (actual thing he did with gen upon meeting her), so i think dean would be a sucker.

jared’s puppy-dog vulnerability would trigger dean’s Sam Mechanism and he’d be stuck to that man like GLUE.

they’re also both super flirty, and them awkwardly trading flirtations that get more and more overt as they get tipsy, jared sliding into dean’s space, feeling so comfortable because this man looks like his best friend, and dean getting a flirty, giggly version of his little brother in his lap??? they’re exchanging handies MINIMUM.

jared is this picture:

and i mean all of this in the most normal, least parasocial way possible. <3 hopefully <3

-lizzy

[slow-burn-sally]

If you have a child with medium or high support needs autism, and you deny the fact that you or the other parent could also possibly be on the spectrum without researching it thoroughly or going for an assessment yourselves, what you're actually doing is making sure your child feels isolated and alone with their disorder, while you get to dodge all the stigma they experience, and get to distance yourself from your child as their beleaguered, exhausted, self-sacrificing, sympathetic, neurotypical caregiver.

I told a coworker I had autism earlier this year and she said "Oh, my son has that. He touches walls to calm down." And she said it with this slight veneer of mockery in her voice as if she couldn't understand why her adult son would do such a kooky thing. Maybe it was a habit she'd developed to get out in front of other people making fun of him by gently doing it herself? Then, not thirty seconds later, she casually mentions that she has trouble recognizing faces. She has ADHD and was open about that with me, but ADHD is (somewhat) less stigmatized, and the well known symptoms involve being chatty, hyperactive, risk taking, spending too much money and being forgetful. Autism by comparison makes most people very uncomfortable every time you bring it up and involves issues with personal hygiene, extreme social problems, often violent or loud or messy meltdowns, trouble making direct eye contact and a whole host of misunderstandings (like that we can't feel empathy or don't lie) etc. etc.

Not saying ADHD doesn't carry its own stigma, but the difference is pretty obvious if you have both and experience telling people about one or the other (like I do and have done).

Two of my Facebook friends swear up and down that their child's autism is the "environmental kind" that "came out of nowhere", yet both are heavily into D&D, cosplay, science fiction/fantasy and come off as blunt and socially awkward. I think a lot of autism parents who swear up and down that autism is caused by vaccines or gluten or other shitty theories, just want to make it clear that though their child has this awful thing (being sardonic here) they have been thrown clear of also possibly having it.

Autism is something like 85% heritable (I postulate that it's likely 100% heritable because stigma means statistics will be heavily skewed) and co-occurs with ADHD at a similar level (if you discover the autism first). If you have an autistic child and claim that there's no way you could also be on the spectrum just because you like a wide variety of foods or have lots of friends or because you don't act exactly like your high support needs kid, you're being both willfully ignorant and ableist, where you could be standing in solidarity with your kid. I have 500 friends, dated polyamorously for 15 years, was a massage therapist for a decade and adore touch. I love sushi and vegetables and spicy food, and am autistic as fuck. Just my opinion.

[jedi-enthusiast]

Except Yoda and the Jedi didn't do any of that and you're just making shit up, which tracks with pretty much everything anti-jedis say about the Jedi.

Anakin quite literally only told Yoda that he was having NIGHTMARES- (aka bad dreams) about someone he loved being hurt, which again is something that is very likely to happen in the middle of a war---to be clear: NO ONE WAS HURT OR DYING at that point in time. Literally no one. It was a nightmare that turned into a self-fulfilling prophecy because Anakin literally strangled his wife and murdered a bunch of people, just to be clear on who you're trying to turn into a poor little meow meow here.

And Yoda wasn't "telling Anakin to suck it up," he WAS supporting him! He told him the truth: that everyone will die at some point, and it will cause him pain when that happens, but that there's no changing the fact that people die and so he should focus on enjoying them while they're here with him and celebrating their lives rather than spending all his time worrying about if/when they're going to die. It was in typical Yoda-speak, so it sounded all sagey and crap, but that's quite literally what he was telling Anakin.

I mean, what would you have rather had him say at that point? Did you want him to lie to Anakin? "Oh, don't worry Anakin! No one is gonna die ever and nothing will ever change!" -because that's what Palpatine did, except he tacked on a lovely- "everything will be fine if you kill a bunch of little kids" -on the end. Like seriously, they were in the middle of a fucking war, odds are people Anakin cared about would get injured or die, did you want Yoda to pretend that that wasn't something probable? Again, did you want him to lie?

And like I said before: everything Yoda said is quite literally taught in grief counseling. You're basically told that, yes, the death of a loved one hurts and it'll never fully go away, but that it's better to focus on the time you had with that loved one and the good stuff you did together rather than focusing on the fact that you didn't do xyz with them or that you didn't get enough time with them. Because that's unhealthy and it only makes you feel worse.

And you can go ahead and shut up about the- "I'm neurodivergent and so was Anakin, the Jedi were all neurotypical bigots who Don't Understand Us Neurodivergents" -because that's really just a bunch of crap.

I am also neurodivergent and have trouble with my emotions, and I think that 1. trying to paint Anakin as the Singular Neurodivergent Jedi is a bad thing and 2. the Jedi Order is absolutely NOT built around neurotypicals, are you fucking serious, have you ever actually watched the shows or movies?

On the first point: as someone who's neurodivergent, I don't think our one point of "representation" in SW should be the genocidal baby murderer who is repeatedly racist, misogynistic, and a literal fascist who strangled his wife the moment she didn't agree with him, went along with/assisted in several genocides, and assisted the Empire in enslaving several other races. Call me crazy, but I'd rather that guy not be singled out as "the only neurodivergent jedi ever because the jedi are all Evil Neurotypicals," thanks.

Secondly: I'm convinced you either never really paid attention to the shit you were watching or you haven't watched the Prequels or TCW in a while because exactly WHAT is giving you the impression that the Jedi are neurotypical? Please tell me.

Their culture is in complete opposition to literally everything neurotypical and heteronormative about our society: the Jedi don't have any pressure to get married or have children, the Jedi don't pressure anyone to be physically affectionate with each other (although there are moments of physical affection that we see from them and there's a lot of verbal affection), the Jedi's relationships with each other don't fit into the typical heteronormative family structure, the Jedi place value on constantly learning new things and changing whenever you need/want (no need to stay stagnant);

The Jedi aren't separated from each other as they all live together in a community of friends and teachers, the Jedi quite literally a job for every specialization (hyperfixations, you can literally be a jedi and specialize in your hyperfixation), the Jedi don't have to wear the same thing 24/7 but you also can wear the same thing 24/7 (no need to worry about wearing "the right outfit") + all their outfits are made to be comfortable and easy to move around in, everyone contributes something and everyone takes care of everyone, there's no pressure to be overly emotional or expressive either (although you can be, if you want to), and the Jedi's teachings are quite literally based around DBT---Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, which is meant to help people with mental illnesses, specifically people with BPD!

So this whole- "oh they're Evil and Neurotypical and Oppressing Us Neurodivergents with their terrible Buddhist teachings" -is complete crap, you are just pulling this stuff out of your ass.

The Jedi do have empathy and do succeed in supporting each other, we're literally shown evidence of that EVERYWHERE in the movies and shows---quite literally the first episode of TCW is Yoda protecting his squad of clone troopers, showing them empathy, and telling them that there's more to them than just their appearances, and the episodes after that literally have Plo Koon showing empathy to his troops and telling them that they're not expendable to him, and there's so much more evidence that I could add JUST IN THAT ONE SHOW!

Anakin is the outlier here because he wouldn't accept help, and you can't help someone if they won't help themselves. Obi-Wan, Ahsoka, Yoda, Luminara, Plo, Mace, Padme, EVERYONE gave Anakin every chance to change and do better and open up to them so they could give him more than just vague advice---but Anakin refused to change, refused to tell anyone anything, and refused to accept the help that was given.

And THAT is the point of the Prequels: that Anakin was selfish and refused help from everyone, which ultimately led him to Palpatine, the Empire, and the Dark Side.

He did that, no one else.

So why don't you stop making shit up to try and absolve Anakin of any responsibility for his actions.

If you like Anakin, go ahead and like him. If you think he's great neurodivergent representation, that's your opinion on that and no one can tell you otherwise. If you don't like the Jedi, okay that's fine.

But what we're not gonna do, especially on my page, is pretend that Anakin never did anything wrong and the choices he made were all the Jedi's fault. They weren't.

Anakin had options, many options, and he chose to do the terrible shit he did---and that is no one else's fault but HIS.

Ngl I think a lot of people, when they talk about Jedi and attachments and how "the Jedi should be allowed to have them," just plain ignore the single most important show of attachment in all of Star Wars.

Padme and Anakin.

Obviously people bring them up 24/7 when they want to bash the Jedi or pretend that Anidala is the epitome of a "healthy relationship" (lmao), but when it comes to the actual point of how their relationship is framed and how it highlights how attachment works/what it does---suddenly all the discussion around Anakin and Padme disappears!

Anakin's attachment to Padme and his unwillingness to let her go is LITERALLY what ends up killing her!!!

He has dreams of her dying, becomes convinced that those dreams are what's gonna happen (despite the unreliable nature of visions), and---instead of actually telling anyone anything in enough detail so they could actually help---he:

- Starts working with a Sith Lord

- Massacres a Temple full of children, the elderly, the injured, etc. and the people who were caring for them

- Helps commit a genocide

- Overthrows democracy

And then, once Padme won't support him vying for them to control the galaxy, he becomes convinced that she's betrayed him and attempts to kill her---then, later on, because of Anakin's actions Padme dies.

----------

THAT is what attachment is and what it does.

Attachment is being unable, unwilling, to let someone go, no matter what that might mean for you or them, because you don't want to go through life without them---and the people you try to hold onto so tight ultimately get crushed in your grip because of it.

Think of it like holding someone's hand.

Non-attachment would be, when the other person wants to stop, letting them slip away and being happy with what you had while you had it---being content whether they choose to stay by your side or run off to go do something else.

Attachment would be, when the other person tries to let go, tightening your grip or grabbing their wrist---hurting them because you don't want there to even be a chance that you would be without them.

----------

So no, the Jedi were not wrong to teach non-attachment and they should not have "changed their philosophies so they were allowed to have attachments" like some people have suggested, because attachment is unhealthy and selfish and all it does is end up hurting those around you.

[xdinari]

Who in XH would and wouldn't read / write fanfics

Jooyeon

reads (as a joke), writes (as a joke)

Has has jokingly written a fanfic about him and Jiseok just to drop it in the group chat and traumatize everyone and make them lose their time

Would read if it was good "WHAT ITS GOOD INSPO"

Gets offended when someone gets something wrong about him "WHY DO THEY KEEP SAYING I DONT BRUSH MY TEETH IN THE MORNING"

Has a very disorganized bookmark system, he doesn't remember what he read, didn't read, plans on reading, it's all a mess

His (joke) fanfics have a lot of spelling mistakes and he does NOT care like that one time he wrote "Jiseok kicked Jooyeon's lips" instead of "kissed" only to be yelled at by the other like "BRO I THOUGHT WE WERE GETTING IT ON?"

Loses sleep over a stupid fanfic he got too invested in

Would recreate cringe fanfic scenes with Jiseok for funnies and first one to laugh fails

One thing about this man is that he's CREATIVE, like what do you mean you wrote a fic where you were all Stuck in a Virtual Reality (that's how the XH lore started)

Junhan

kinda reads, sometimes writes angst about a movie he watched

Would read something once by mistake and now he's kinda addicted to little snippets but he's too embarrassed of it, he's a weird mixture of embarrassed of it, weirded out and intrigued

He can appreciate good writing regardless of the type of writing (novel, fanfic)

One time he saw a really cool fanfic name, those with long names and he stole it to use it as a name for one of their songs

Doesn't really read, but will open Jooyeon's fanfic just to go "hey guys why am I not here :(" and just for Jungsu, who's a delivery guy in the fic to go "WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO BE A PART OF THIS?"

The few times he writes, he's incredible at describing emotions and thoughts, even though he might think he's not

Seungmin

doesn't read, doesn't write, judges

He tried to read something once, came across a cringe badly written one and never again

He might read one if u show it to him just to judge if they did well with the characterization

"God this is making my head hurt why are there no comas..."

Kicks Jooyeon out of the group for sending his fanfic

Won't admit it but he likes it when people write him well and gets an ego boost from it

Jiseok

reads, writes, shares, DOES NOT CARE

"ITS ART"

He comes to gunil one day like "THIS FIC IS SO FUNNY THEY MADE YOU A DRUG DEALER"

Has been late to multiple practices because of being too immersed in a fic

Co-writes with Jooyeon just to piss Seungmin off when they make him bald in one of their works

"Ah...this is what real writing is..." (the fic wrote him as a super cool guy that gets everyone he sets his mind to, is muscular and talented)

Uses it as inspo for their more intense songs when he's out of ideas

Would dedicate you a fanfic as a birthday present if you asked him to

The absolute KING of dialogue, absolutely everything this man writes is COMEDY GOLD, PEARL CLUTCHING (Gunil has stolen his jokes from fics multiple times as a party trick) (Jiseok lets him)

Jungsu

reader to an extent but mostly writes (he canonically admitted to writing stories after he watches movies I know what you are)

He is epecially a WRITER he LOVES IT

It helps with song inspo, managing his emotions, expressing himself in a more rough way

If he reads about himself his ego gets BOOSTED especially when it's written as him being hot (he cried the first time he read smut out of happiness people find him hot)

"I write about....stuff..just yeah..."

Writes very descriptively, with a lot of emotion and carefully chosen words

Loves to write romance and is not ashamed of it

Shares his works with the members so he can get feedback and they all go along with it because they love him and his writing (even Seungmin)

"STOP MAKING ME SO BORING IN YOUR FICS, JOOYEON, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!!"

Gunil

reads if asked, doesn't write

He thinks t's funny and might read a bit if u give it to him saying "Whatever makes u happy I won't judge."

Always gives five star reviews when he's shown a piece of writing

He catches himself giggling at a fic of reader x gunil then immediately puts his phone down

Somehow everyone in the dorm got wrapped up in the fanfic deal and he threatens the members wifh exposing them whenever they're not behaving

"Guys I think it's time you uninstall google docs..."

Steals Jiseok's fanfic Jokes

They make it a whole thing, they have like 30 extra inside jokes because of the fanfic ordeal

thank you to my dearest coworker @chericherilvr for participating with ideas and supporting this 🫦

[many-gay-magpies]

i feel inclined to make a post about the time i was trying to write something in-depth about queerplatonic payneland/aromantic charles and how he and edwin would work out their feelings for each other in that scenario, and i DID end up writing a short queerplatonic payneland fic, but it was basically just me self-indulgently making them smooch aromantic style for 3000 words. the actual longer fic id planned to write exploring aromantic charles never came to fruition, because in the course of attempting to define the difference between romantic and platonic love for the purpose of writing about how CHARLES felt it differently, i realized i just. could not fucking tell the difference. at all. i made posts asking allo people what the difference was and their answers did not help me for shit.

i think, like, the conclusion i came to for my own purposes was that—charles's and edwin's feelings for each other were probably actually about the same? that is, edwin feels deep all-encompassing eternal love and affection for charles; he wants to stay with charles and keep him safe and make him smile and do cases and play board games with him forever; keep him as the most important person in his afterlife forever. then on top of that he wants to do stuff like kiss him and have sex with him and whatnot. and then charles feels all the same stuff, deep intense all-encompassing love and a desire to have edwin be His Person forever—AND he would really like to kiss edwin and probably also love having sex with him (alloaro charles, OR sex-favorable ace/demi charles who likes sex for the physical intimacy and connection more than anything). but edwin uses the societal definition of In Love to categorize/describe his feelings, naming them as explicitly romantic, while charles... has a very complicated relationship with the idea of romance, the idea of being In Love; he has never been IN LOVE with anyone, or ever thought he could be; he just knows edwin is His Person, and he wants that to be the case for as long as possible, and he also would really like to kiss him (and maybe do more than that). but there is some missing bridge between those two things labeled Romantic Love/Being In Love that he just does not have access to, with anyone. and because of that his feelings will forever be not enough.

and basically, i was swimming through all these thoughts and never felt like i found a way to write it that wouldn't feel like it was being dismissive of aromanticism by saying "youre all feeling the same thing actually and your labels dont matter". and also i kept wanting to bash my head in over romantic love as a societal construct. seriously even today im half convinced romantic love is a societal construct/intersection of other emotions human beings just slapped a label on for funsies and not an actual unique emotion. i feel a little bad for never writing that initial fic, and for the fact that most of my payneland fics these days categorize them explicitly as a reciprocal romantic relationship (where charles realizes/is fated to realize sooner or later Ah Yes I Am In Love With Edwin The Same Way Back Actually), but these thoughts and this interpretation still color pretty much everything i write/create about them: fundamentally, it does not matter whether their love is platonic, romantic, or fucking whatever in-between or on any other spot of the spectrum. what it is is huge, intense, fundamentally weird (affectionate) and codependent to a truly unhinged degree. edwin sat with charles and read to him, gave him a friend while he was dying and for every year after; charles went into literal hell to save edwin without a moment's hesitation. each of them could not possibly love the other any more than they already do. anything that changes from here on out is just a matter of perception.

anyway. it is currently five in the morning and i have not slept, and i feel like this is way more long-winded than it needs to be/not as concise or effectively-indicative of my point as it could be, but im releasing it out into the world anyway. i can come back tomorrow and add a more concise addendum if i need to. moral of the story is get aromantic about it 👍

(and also payneland are Best Friends first and foremost, always. everything else is secondary <3)

[explosionshark]

Yeah, people are mixing their punitive world view and caitvi's sexual dynamic together. "Carbon offsets" LMAO You are so real for that and because it's true, people are treating it like that!

Oh, you and hex put it into the words I couldn't! A lot of people play the D/s dynamic straight, but what I've really enjoyed about your fics is the underlying tension of "is this okay? is it okay if i like this? is it okay if i do this to/for you?" from both parties and then discovering the other person is 100% into it. It makes the smut feel so earned and cathartic. Character-driven smut, hell yeah, juicy indeed!

No, thank YOU for such a thorough response! I appreciate you taking the time to answer.

Oooo, I'd love to hear your thoughts on Cait's domme origins!

Anon, our psychic bond is so powerful. We are like this 🧠⚡⚡⚡🧠

Specifically after I got your first ask last night, I was talking it over with Hex again to get their permission to screenshot and we had this exchange (I blacked out a reference to some specific shit talking I did earlier that I don't want public lmao)

So y'know. You're getting a good grade @ sending in good analysis which is normal to want and possible to achieve

Oh, you and hex put it into the words I couldn't! A lot of people play the D/s dynamic straight, but what I've really enjoyed about your fics is the underlying tension of "is this okay? is it okay if i like this? is it okay if i do this to/for you?" from both parties and then discovering the other person is 100% into it. It makes the smut feel so earned and cathartic. Character-driven smut, hell yeah, juicy indeed!

Augh thank you so much for this. There's a thousand different ways to approach these guys but when I'm writing them and I'm playing into a D/s dynamic specifically I always really try to emphasize Vi's power and Caitlyn's vulnerability in relationship to those roles. Part of what's appealing about it at all is we're talking about a dynamic that really plays well with and emphasizes the themes already in the show and I think to get the most out of that there needs to be an acknowledgement of like. Willing and purposeful exchange of power. They need to both be getting something out of it.

I love Caitlyn being a little desperate and unhinged, I love her being really intense and maybe a little pushy but ultimately she's like. Standing there with her chest flayed open and her beating heart offered up and it's Vi who can really choose to tell her to fuck off at any moment. I think Caitlyn as a Domme (specifically with Vi, who she's in love with) works best as a machine that's fueled by a deep well of brittle neediness. I love Vi as being built up to give herself over and let go and be cherished and dominated in a cathartic and empowering way, but I need Caitlyn to be a porcelain horse of a woman who is perpetually two steps from shattering completely if Vi stops wanting her.

And finally! The people have spoken! Including you but also these people!

@droamiin I am actually pretty sure I DM'd you some of these HCs a while back but I love repeating myself for attention so

Caitlyn Domme Origins HC/analysis under the cut:

So first of all we have to acknowledge that we're dealing with a girl here who is at once the privileged scion of one of the most powerful houses in Piltover, inheritor of a huge legacy AND also a stifled only-child under immense pressure from parents who mean well but clearly have a vision for her life they want to impose on her and who are guilty of being controlling and disapproving of her choices

Given all this, I feel like she always would have been kind of a bossy kid. This probably did not earn her a ton of friends

But if there's one thing we know about Caitlyn it's that she LOVES RULES. She loves Rules so much she went against her parents wishes to pursue a career in enforcing them. If there's a second thing we know about Caitlyn it's that SHE HATES BAD RULES. If she thinks a rule sucks or is unfair, she will not just ignore it but actively work against it. So we have a powerful rich girl who is stifled by her parents and also loves rules but thinks her own judgement supercedes any established rule that she doesn't like. ARE YOU GETTING IT??? ARE YOU PUTTING IT TOGETHER???

Tbh I feel like she would have been head girl at school, y'know??? Like that's her vibe, seeing herself as someone who has a responsibility and an attitude to assume a leadership role. I think she would have had an interesting and sometimes hostile relationship to authority in that context- she's absolutely the kind of kid who would have been annoying and played up her privilege to stand up to faculty she thought was being unfair to other students. Even though again I don't think any of this is making her popular lmao

We know from word of God that Caitlyn has been sneaking girls into her room for ages. I love this. I support the Caitlyn Kiramman womanizer era. To me it makes perfect sense - she is SUCH an eligible bachelorette. Rich, hot, powerful family, pretty much guaranteed seat on the council.

Less of a Domme thing specifically and more of a general HC but I think it's here in her slut era that Caitlyn would make some formative mistakes. I imagine discovering her sexuality would be a BLAST for Caitlyn and she'd have a lot of fun playing the field and trying things out and figuring out what she likes, but I think her coming back to earth moment would probably be realizing the gap between her power as a Kiramman and the power of the girls that want her that don't have that level of status. I don't think she would be intentionally callous or break hearts for the ego boost, but I do think there's absolutely some encounters where girls feel lead on or used because they wanted more than what she was offering. I think Caitlyn would feel genuinely horrible about this and try to communicate very clearly going forward. I like this HC especially bc it plays into her hesitance/patience with Vi and also really emphasizes what a huge terrible backslide the Maddie thing is 🥰

Anyway yeah I think that's the basically the main point. Caitlyn has been groomed for leadership and command from a young age. She has nominally more power than 90% of people in the city and she's SO aware of it, but there's very little control she's actually able to assert on her life and her environment. I think part of how she deals with this is defying her parents to become an Enforcer and Solve Crime Forever and Make Things Right for the Undercity (Caitlyn's sense of morality is also so fuckin interesting to me but that's another different post). And I think getting really into dominating girls who get off on the idea of a rich bitch top ordering them around is another way she deals with this.

I DO think she should feel weird about it sometimes. Self-loathing adds a delightful frisson of angst to the whole deal and I like Caitlyn best when she's suffering and self doubting to some degree. Being with Vi and still wanting to dominate her despite their histories should probably inspire some weird guilt and shame to work through BUT I like to imagine that eventually as they settle into their relationship and move on from the events of the show that at some point in the future Caitlyn can embrace the joy of being an unhinged rich pervert with enough money and power to realize some truly absurd fantasies for the both of them.

There it is, that's basically my whole Domme Cait manifesto lmao

[dollypopup]

So, as one of our Certified Resident Queers (affectionate), it's been rubbing me the wrong way how some people have been using us queer folks for concern trolling about Luke being cast as Alexander McQueen in the play, and I need to lay some shit out for people real fast

1: Queer people are not and never have been a monolith. What one queer person feels about a role, an action, a situation etc. may not be what another feels. That being said, cishet people and those who do not identify with Queerness, or, as the Straights prefer, the LGBTQIA+ community, really should not be overstepping Queer voices. If you want to agree with or amplify what a queer person is saying, that is one thing. Making assumptions and using those assumptions to dunk on a casting decision just reeks of you using us to further your own agenda, instead of centering our experiences and beliefs

2: You do not know who is or isn't Queer unless they have explicitly told you. You don't actually know if Luke Newton is a straight man. You can make assumptions, you can presume, but unless it comes out of his mouth (and it doesn't HAVE to), you don't know. There has been a HUGE conversation about how to cast Queer roles and ultimately, it's ongoing. However, it remains that forcing people to disclose their sexuality in order to be hired is discrimination. And it's really fucking dangerous. Especially in the US, where it is scary as hell to be openly queer rn. And I should know. I'm living it.

3: Whether Luke is straight or not, he is not openly queer, and so if he takes heat from homophobes for taking on this role, in a way, it is protection. It means that as an ally he is normalizing queer roles and standing with queer people. This is not, in my opinion, 'taking the opportunity' from a queer actor. Queer actors play straight characters all the time and should not have to disclose their sexuality. So long as he is respectful, and it seems that he is, I see nothing wrong with a straight actor playing queer characters.

4: Fuck every single one of y'all who are weaponizing queerness in these fandoms. Lukolas demanding that Jake is gay to further their own agenda, fuck you. Luke haters pretend pearl clutching about Luke NOT being gay (and playing a queer role) to further their own agenda, fuck you. Queer people are not bullets in your fanwars or gotcha moments or pawns to move around this dumbass chessboard. Eat me.

5: Yes, as a queer person, I AM excited to see more openly queer roles being depicted, whether on stage or in various other forms of media. Homophobia and transphobia and queerphobia is rampant right now, and the existence of full dimensional, nuanced, humanized depictions is something to applaud and be excited for. That said, we have not seen his depiction. It COULD end up not being a well written or thoughtful role, it COULD end up that he does not do justice to it. But it COULD end up being fantastic, and I very much enjoy Luke's acting and how much he pours into every role, and I'm an optimist, so I have faith it'll be great. Regardless, let's hold off on judgements until we see it, yes?

6: If you are not queer, I respectfully ask that you shut the fuck up about this discussion. Your role as an ally is to uplift, support, and seek understanding. Stop talking over us. Stop putting words in our mouths. Stop making assumptions. Discussions like these are nuanced and complicated, queer people have been discussing this shit for generations. No offense here, but y'all don't have skin in this game like we do.

[sincerelyrf]

me: *seeing people yell about how they did Glintshore & Percy's death in the show*

also me: ..................anyway

[qoldenskies]

poverty au alternate names:

Empty Pockets

Sleep is for those with money

Fuck Coffee is expensive

giggles cause i got a name idea (thank you for the crane wives and thank you specifically that person who recommended mad dog to me. ive taken to calling it the kickback universe in my head so i guess that's what its called now) but that is definitely a vibe. i bet they splurged on that coffee machine soooo hard but they have like dollar store grounds and it tastes like shit and no creamer could save it. donnie drinks it black anyway which is a sin

its not like i could call it the "donnie is the only one with college opportunities because mikey is barely skirting by with Cs, leo had to drop out because unmedicated adhd, and raph skipped most opportunities for higher education especially with sports to focus on providing for the family, so donnie's doing running start while also working a job because his father's dercums progressed to a point where he cant even really go outside without being in immense pain because they dont have enough money or insurance to afford any real care (and no extended family to fall back on because splinter was cut off from them, other than a cousin across the country) and rely on april to drive them around, and then the landlord unexpectedly raises rent in an attempt to get them out and donnie because he's taken on the job of managing their finances decides to hide this from them and start working a SECOND job under the table that includes the fucking graveyard shift with a boss that barely pays him enough under the table and its partially because he's blasian AND trans, and this is also while he's going to running start college, while having a job to go to right after running start college, and also he has to worry about tutoring mikey and helping leo get a GED and groceries and like everything because he doesn't want to put more undue stress on raph who is the only line of support he would normally have here" au. although maybe it would be funny if i did?

i got carried away when making the joke. there's the premise i guess. i'll probably just write one big oneshot but because all of them have Prablems maybe i'll expand a little, right now im keeping the scope small so dont expect anything for a while since i have so much to do atm, i'll talk about if people want to hear more though! .... i did not expect to get as invested as i did. CANARY CONTINUITY FIRST

[cent-scratchnsniff]

here together