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Just watched Roanoke Gaming (on youtube) video’s on the Spartan’s of Halo and how, realistically, their augmentation could be done/what would need to be done for the ‘super serum’ to work. And just…the angst and hurt/comfort of that would be so good if, say…Desmond were to go through that and then be magically poof'ed to AC??
Each of the ancestor’s would surely see different uses and advantages of such strength and enhancement’s…but also the pain of them? Both physical and mental? Desmond would need a lot of loving and comfort.
Some notes taken from the video’s and lore, so everyone is on the same page without necessarily needing to watch the videos-(though you should, they are very good.)
Skeletal Augmentations:
At 14, the Spartans were already over 6 foot tall due to overhauling the pituitary gland to induce puberty immediately to ‘flash grow’ them, making them grow taller than normal at an accelerated rate, which had the side effect of weakening the bones as they grew too rapidly for proficient calcium to be placed applied to the growing bones.
This lead to a surgery to 'correct’ the fragility. Basically the bone is 'shaved’ before a carbide ceramic coating was manually fused to the bones, giving them support. This was described as feeling like the bones were made of glass and then shattering inside the body. No more than 3% of the bone could be replaced or the surgery would fail.
Surviving the initial surgery did not mean it was successful. While healing the body was under extreme stress, and could lead to shock, cardiac or respiratory arrest, leading to death. With the bone 'shaved’ it would encourage your body to begin rebuilding the bone, making the bone grow around the new ceramic coating.
The bones, after healing, are nearly unbreakable, withstanding hundreds of thousands of pounds of pressure before breaking.
If the surgery fails because more than 3% of the bone was lost and you don’t die, you will become paralyzed or debilitated because your white blood cells will necroes, leading to septic shock that will eventually lead to the rest of the body being infected with the sepsis.
This surgery makes Spartan’s very heavy and leaves a lot of scarring, as the surgery is highly invasive.
Muscle Augmentation:
More and denser muscle fibers, leading to faster stamina recovery as well as more overall strength, from some sort of injection.
A side effect of this injection could lead to an enlarged heart in 5% of subjects.
The injection feels as though the veins have been injected with napalm and are being torn out of the skin.
The muscle augmentation without the bone augmentation would allow the subject to contract their muscle with so much force they’d shatter their own bones.
Neurological Augmentation:
Quicker and more efficient communication between neurons, leading to faster reaction times.
Subjects can nearly see things in 'slow motion’.
Reaction time is 20 milliseconds, movements seeming nothing but a blur to other unenhanced individuals.
Running 38 mph is an easy feat.
Migraines can be a recurring issue.
TL:DR
Desmond is basically super human, but he got that way with a lot of invasive surgery and trauma against his will.
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teccup additions:
Roanoke Gaming has an entire playlist of Halo Lore and other videos if you’re curious.
For those not that familiar with Halo lore (which is understandable as Halo is a series that likes to put a lot of lore in the novels), the most famous of the Spartans, Master Chief, is a Spartan II. The games mostly focus on either Spartans from Spartan II (like Master Chief) or Spartan III (most members of Noble Team from Halo Reach are from SPARTAN III so if anyone wants to create a Halo x AC crossover that has Desmond be part of the Halo Universe first, you can put him as part of Spartan II or III training.
Either way, there are many ways to kick him to the AC verse but, on the top of my head, if you wish for Desmond to be part of the Halo verse before getting kicked into the AC verse:
The Isus could have been part of the Forerunners (an ancient species of extremely technologically advanced beings that had ruled over the milky way) and the Solar Flare hadn’t just hit the earth, it had hit EVERY part of the milky way by being the start of a chain reaction of every sun in the solar systems in the milky way.
Of course, we can keep the whole AC timeline intact with one caveat: the next Solar Flare would not happen in December 2012, it would happen in August of 2552 (if you want it to be a reference: August 12 would be Altaïr’s death day). This is an important month in Halo lore because this is the month when the Battle of Reach ended (which was one of the bloodiest campaigns during the Human-Covenant Wars (Covenants are the baddies who worship the Forerunners as gods so they’re kinda like alien-inclusive version of Juno’s Instruments of the First Bitch))
By setting it on the Battle of Reach, we will have the choice of letting Desmond be part of Master Chief’s storyline or of Noble Team’s storyline.
If we consider that the Calculations knew that Desmond would be in Reach during the time of the next Solar Flare, the device would be in Reach as well and the main point is to ensure Desmond gets to the Grand Temple there.
We can wave it off as there being Grand Temples all around the Milky Way, all connected to one another and Desmond has to activate one of them to activate all of them. Once all have been activated, the field will surround all planets with the Grand Temple (fertile planets filled with life) and will be spared from the chain reaction of Solar Flares.
Of course, this is not taking into consideration the possibility that the species in Halo lore haven’t noticed the incoming Solar Flare. To combat this and make Desmond have no choice, perhaps it’s something that only builds up towards the last few months (around maybe Feb or March?), not enough time to fully study it and combat it with confidence.
Anyway, the main point is that Desmond would come into contact with the Grand Temple in Reach and activate it.
From there, he will save the planets with a Grand Temple (but this does mean not all of the planets will be saved and any ships in space will not be saved as well) and he’ll be transported to whichever timeline you’d like him to be in AC.
Now, if you want a purely AC fic with the Spartan Augmentation added into the lore, we can go down this route:
The Great Purge happened when Desmond was 13 and the Farm will be hit
(Bonus drama: make Desmond have a fight with Bill who is trying to get them out and it ends with him running away but getting captured by Abstergo, hearing his mother screaming his name before the sounds of gunfire silenced her, replaced by screams all over the Farm)
Spartan II ‘subjects’ were 5 to 6 years old when they started their augmentation but Desmond was included in Abstergo’s own version of Spartan ‘training’ (either keep the name and make it something sort of an insult to Kassandra or make it a reference to Deimos who was technically Spartan or change the training name to something more ‘Templar-ish’) as an ‘experiment’.
He and the other Assassin children would be part of a special experiment to check if age is truly a factor in a subject’s surviving the augmentations.
Cross would have been a Spartan from an earlier iteration and he’s the first true success. He was augmented early (like around 5ish years old) and that’s how Abstergo decided they needed to experiment on different ages.
Assassin prisoners are free guinea pigs.
Of course, this means that Lucy is also part of the program as an innocent 12-year-old child. Perhaps even make her something like a sister to Desmond during their horrific augmentation, indoctrination, and training life together.
This would add more angst to the story if Lucy either dies during training or she is one of the successful Spartans who becomes loyal to Abstergo in the process, giving a more or less Cain and Abel setup between her and Desmond.
Either way, Desmond survives the training thanks to his higher-than-normal Isu genes and it’s because of his ‘abnormal’ gene makeup that Warren Vidic noticed him, taking him out of Spartan Training and making him become part of the Animus Project.
Same setup where Desmond relives his ancestors’ memories. AC1 plot ends with Bill being the one to rescue Desmond. From there, we go for the rest of Desmond Saga’s plotline which will end with Desmond using the device to save the world in 2012.
Lucy’s subplot, if we go for her living through the Spartan training, will end in Rome when she replaces Cross in the final showdown. Desmond will be the one to kill her and she dies in his arms. Whether they reconcile while she’s dying or she dies telling him that she hates him for leaving her will be up to you.
Either way, Desmond gets transported into his ancestor’s timeline after he uses the device.
Whichever setup you use, I believe that Desmond and his ancestors’ relationship would be similar in the sense that:
Altaïr would be the quickest to understand him because they have the most similar upbringing: children raised to be soldiers. Desmond would also recognize the Levantine Brotherhood’s rigid ranking system as familiar and would consider Altaïr as his team leader even if it’s only the two of them (Malik would be more or less his commanding officer)
Altaïr and Desmond’s relationship would be more akin to two puppets trying to be more than what their ‘masters’ expect them to be with Altaïr taking the lead as he’s more independent than Desmond who just accepts any orders given to him.
Ezio, on the other hand, would be the most awkward around him as he’s unsure of how to ‘handle’ Desmond. On the other hand, Desmond would totally be unsure of what to do when he’s around the Auditores and it would be easy for them to push him to stay and just… try to relax.
Ezio and Desmond’s relationship would be more akin to a ‘normal’ boy trying to befriend and understand a military kid. Ezio would most definitely spend his time trying to teach Desmond how to relax and have fun. (If this is an Ezio who knows who Desmond is thanks to Minerva’s recording, he’d also be the most protective)
Ratonhnhaké:ton would try to communicate to Desmond like he’s a wild animal at first because of how Desmond’s first solution to any problem they face is to kill the source but he’ll soon realize that Desmond isn’t acting like a wild animal but an abused one.
Ratonhnhaké:ton and Desmond’s relationship would be more akin to someone trying to help another person but not sure of how to do it. He also doesn’t have a similar support system as Ezio does and Achilles may do more harm than good thanks to his personality and how he handles his charges (ex: Ratonhnhaké:ton and Shay for different reason). Haytham is also a big red flag when it concerns Desmond as Haytham is a Templar.
#submission#assassin's creed#desmond miles#altaïr ibn la'ahad#ezio auditore#ratonhnhaké:ton#connor kenway#teecup writes/has a plot#fic idea: assassin's creed#fic idea: crossover#fic idea: halo#halo#should i even tag master chief or noble team?#probably not#this will definitely be angsty#such lovely angst#or you can make the solar flare august 28 which is my birthday hahahaha#and of course i will confess in the tags#i only played the first halo XD#since we only had an og xbox#my brother traded our dreamcast for it TTATT
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ive been thinking about the red string superstition recently and also sol bufo always and it makes me sick how uncannily caldwell tanner has made sol to perfectly target me personally
(+ cropped versions !)
#naddpod#ba2mia#ba2umia#solum bufo#swag daniels#calliope petrichor#calder kilde#alexandrite#posts by me dot com#okay..... SECRET TAGS RAMBLE!#so basically this superstition is like ... i think a chinese/buddhist/taoist superstition?#ive taken some creative liberties with it... but its mostly accurate to how its been told to me?#but of course theres lots of variations! some more abt bad luck; some say to tie it on the doorknob#etc etc ... lots a variations#i was also rlly interested in the .... weird illogic? of the thing?#like the red attracts and repels spirits at the same time#so thats something i was thinking about with too. red is assocuated with both swag and alexandrite. which to me was kinda reflecting like#i think what murph said . swags place in the wild is in a way. an extension of what he learned from the network#mothership s inextractivle from sol and swags lives. they will always be held doen by it. thats the spirit that will follow them forever#that they choose to hold on too! as much pain as it brought ... some of the experience was worth it#and anyway. theres somethingwrong w me that the minute someone brought up this superstition my brain went#'ohhh just like sol!' < needs to touch grass moment#but i CANT BELIEVE. CALDWELL DID THE RED STRING. AND ITS LITERALLY A MOURNING RITUAL#caldwell keeps accodentally makig that frog ASIAN. to MEEEE!!!!!!#but. anyway. idk. ive always hced sol kept the piece of yarn and it makes me kinda .... what if y let the malicious spirits follow you.#and haunt you. what if its the closest you can get to keeping the person still around#and sol and swag obviously have so much about homes .... so!#(ok. weve reached the pt where maybe nobodys reading? so confession is this is sort of a well. ive just been doodling this comic everyday#after a wake. and it was sort of inspired after realising i was even a bit sad about it maybe. so. idk its about sol but also?#i guess the projection doesnt end at him being asian. hehe. is what i mean. LOL. okay secret tags over . buried lore. dont look here folks)
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Would it be weird to say that I would want to breed with Bubba Sawyer? Like… No lie, would love to become the mama of his kids. He’s just so hot… and he’s a good dad type, too. The setup is perfect there. 😮💨🥰
#suggestive#confession#Bubba Sawyer#Leatherface#The Texas Chainsaw Massacre#Texas Chainsaw Massacre#tcm#tcm2#The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2#slashers#slasher fucker#I think Bubba is very protective of those he cares about and is obviously family oriented of course. It's just a matter of getting in 😊#Him as a father...? I certainly wonder how that would go 🤔#It's an interesting idea that I've actually considered but it's too much to write in tags lol. I'm curious other people's thoughts 💭
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Confession #137
"NGL, I thought SNW Charades was interesting and feel hurt when people hate on it. It’s an interesting take on a character with a mysterious/vague backstory. We don’t know if a species change would just be a physical, it could also affect someone psychologically or emotionally. Either way, it would be interesting to see and we got to see a take on how that would affect someone. I feel like if that episode was a fanfic it wouldn’t get as much hate."
#confession 137#star-trek-fandom-confessions#star trek#st strange new worlds#episode tag: Charades#snw spock#i'm sorry to say that i can't agree with anon but no hard feelings of course
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So was thinking, maybe the ship name could be like..
Millitz, feels like it rolls off the tongue better and it combines the two names moreso.
Also some other HCs…
Whenever they get into a fight/argument, they decide to wrestle for who is right. Though sometimes they forget what the argument is and it devolves into a heated make out/sex session between the two right on the floor.
Blitz loves Millie’s long hair, so much so that every chance he gets he likes to hold or brush it. In bed he likes to sleep with her hair on him.
I can really see the "relationship fights turning into physical fights turning into sex" thing
#confession#helluva boss#miltz#<<< still will be tagging these with my version sorry :b#I'm just imagining her letting Blitz do the clumsiest messiest braid on her big beautiful hair because he felt like it#“yeah of course I can braid. I had a sister too. you're gonna look so fucking beautiful babe”#Blitz your sister was bald and so are you#it ends up looking like something big hairy & horrid crawled on her head and died /ref#but she does not undo it right away bc her boyfriend made it and he did his best fuck you#I can also imagine (due to their height difference) him sometimes hugging her from behind and burying his face in her hair#“...Blitz are you sniffing” “your shampoo smells nice :}”#SORRY I can't resist brainstorming cute fluff headcanons you pulled me into the mood
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Transcript: people need to stop tagging undertale au stuff as undertale methinks. it gets a little irritating when you're actually looking for undertale posts
#utdrmv confession#confession#undertale au#// I have been trying my best to do this myself on my main art account but it is a hard habit to break…#of course you could always filter tags but I understand the frustration.
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wait, has anyone done eddie leaving hawkins after the events of season4, be it government pressure or just hightails it bc fuck hawkins, but like instead of going to the city(chicago or indianapolis) or out west to make it big, no he goes south, back to tennessee, he ends up making the right connections with producers and such and eventually makes it big as a musician/songwriter except the party never finds out because he's working under a pseudonym And in a totally different genre (im learning towards folk/bluegrass)
anyway this specific blorbo thought was brought to you by "who will sing for me" by the stanley brothers playing at work a lot recently
#and of course we have to have eventual steddie bc its my brain and i say so#and also im a sucker for steve reconnecting with eddie after being separated from the party#so like maybe a couple years down the line steve runs into a familiar man in the city that he maybe chases down bc theres no way#but it is eddie and they catch up and eddie confesses that he's been in the music bizz for afew years and steve asks how havent they notice#before? bc yeah the og party got into metal while in high school and maybe steve indulged dustins interest more after that spring bc part o#him was searching for eddie in the songs to get to know the man he gotten close to in a week then lost so suddenly#and maybe a small hopeful part of steve searched the metal scene bc he hoped that eddie had survived and been whisked away like hopper#so imagine his surprise to learn that not only was he right but also munson is now a country musician???#umm im sure this could be something but im not super into rockstar/fame aus so i dont plan on writing an actual fic#but this is definitely not inspired by having to listen to country/folk songs at work that spark blorbo thoughts#stranger things brainrot#steddie songs#<im tagging that bc i unforunately forsee myself posting more music based rambles#steddie ficlet#<in the tags at least
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AAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH WE GOT ARCANEEEEEEEEEE
#MY GOOOOOD JAYCE MAKING VIKTOR?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?! AND OG COURSE CAITS MOM OOOOOF#cant believe were getting angsty caitvi breakup music video second thing in the show aldjaksk they got PRIORITIES#CAIT AND MEL WHEN TWO QUEENS JOIN THEIR POWER TO MAXIMIZE THEIR JOINT SLAY#vi just at caits house all this time.... like probably a week at most but akdhsksnsl#cait hasnt shed a single tear its going down down#oh wow......... yes she didnt think but whats worse is that vi will end up accepting WHYYY#vi will change the enforcers from the inside.....no fucking way qkdhaksjska#YEEEEEEEEESSSS CAITLYYYYYYNNNNNNN#VIIIIIIIIIIIIII#did ambessa really orchestrate the attack with the underground??? no fucking way but that would make so much sense#damn what did caitlyn see in that computer bc she switched up quick!!! and vi too!!! she went from call off the attack to ill join them#well of course the attack changed theit minds but vi still said to call off the ttack after that....#ALSO vi wiping off caits tears.... caitlyn just crying on her chest like throwing herself on her.... no kiss even yet.... but i like this#i love the tension..... the courting you would call it#what will viktor think when he comes back wrong (FOR SURE) because of jayce when he was soooo accepting of his death... kind of#like he knew he was gonna die and he did what he could with the hextech but i think it was not out of desperation#it was just ambition bc thats what he can do... jayce became councilor bc of ambition and viktor kinda saved his own life#talking tag#watching arcane#watching arcane season 2#everybody going thru it in the intro credits and ekko just doing flips akdhaksnsla#jayce hiding from the spotlight.... NOW??? Also viktor is givning diavolo vibes in the jojo 5 intro too aldjaksjksnsl slay#sevika defending jinx.... never thought i would see the day#they did NOT orchestrate the attack look at this mess#OF COURSE SKY IS IN THE HEXTECH!!!! OOOOOOOOOOHHHHH THE VOICES VIKTOR!!! LISTEN TO THEM!!!#jayce promised to destroy it omggg of course....... the confession......#it was affection that held us together..... what are we..... christ why is he so serene and logical.... the hexcore yeah#viktor will bring a class war the likes weve never seen#jinx has claggors googles.... which vi has after the timeskip.....#they are here..... and that arm is gonna cost sevika dlahdksns viktor savior of the underground... i used to pray for times like these....
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Rereading game of thrones has made me like. Really dislike the popular perceptions of margaery tyrell of like. This master manipulator and femme fatale because theres actually very little in the books that suggest that she is? While we get a bit of her and olenna (the like. Actual schemer...) through sansas chapters most of what we see of margaery is through cerseis chapters. And of course cersei thinks shes scheming and fucking her way through the castle because cersei is cersei. Its an extremely biased perspective on margaery but the show just kind of. Decided margaery is actually what cersei thinks of her. And thats just not the case. Like i dont think margaery is just. Chilling and doing nothing but everything we see of her shes literally just. Doing what a queen should and trying to support tommens rule to support herself and her familys position like. Cersei is just cersei.
#And yeas i call the books game of thrones too sorry#And like okay sure shes getting moon tea from pycell thats pretty damning but like. We know so little about that it could be her getting it#Like shes surrounded by other women and girls and while you can say its riskier for her to grab it than others i feel like you can also mak#The argument that she has the most access to pycell as the queen#And of course theres never any evidence that she fucks anyone? Cersei and qyburn have to literally torture confessions from people which ar#Obviously fake because torture doesnt work and the scene is pretty fucking clear about that like#Like sorry maybe i forgot something that will be in cerseis chapters in book 5 but like maybe margaery is just really sweeties we have way#More evidence of that and that shes winning by being sweeties.....#Good morning sorry had got thoughts#Game of thrones#Actual tag for it at the end sywoakskahd
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hello internet aliens, presumably of earth
cyberspace freaks me out but im trying to lean into everything i imagine it could be, like a place to meet fellow zine lovers and introvert punks and wandering idiots.
ive been living in my apartment for approximately 1 year, which is longer than ive lived anywhere since i was a child. im getting that feeling again to get rid of everything i own and hitchhike into the middle of the country. its like a static at the base of my feet that stays there even on my most sleepless nights when i walk in circles over all the bridges in the city.
i just turned 25 & can only describe the experience as a dilated sense of time compression, the swelling of every moment gone by in a blink once it’s passed, the way i didnt realize i had written hundreds of pages this year that all attest to a vague and generalized insanity.
in this age of commodification i think that i shouldnt give zines away for free or that i should publish all my musings (tucked away in a corner of google drive in comic sans so i remember language is all invented), but i think this right here is all i have the strength to do. i cant post anything in the void without thinking of the parasitic nature of the corporations that profit off my free creative labor, but i like you freaks.
this whole ‘existing in material terms’ seems too large to do without screaming into some kind of underwater.
going to go to the library now and hope any eyes who see this can know that the burdens of mortality are shared, and i outstretch a hand to you, fellow traveller.
peace to the living, eternal rest to the dead
-z
#putting tags on things make me anxious too#writing#but of course at the end of the day i want to connect with you souls of cyberspace#writers on tumblr#i hope your day goes well#writeblr#i hope you see a tree you like#about me#i hope you let yourself grieve#journal#me#zine#confession#alchemy
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Queued posts that aged horribly:
Ahaha...
These guys are my Sandra...
#/kydra reference#never thought i'd be so distraught to hear people cheer for my band#this was the worst panic attack i've had in a while haha i actually fainted#i mean i frequently have trouble breathing and pass out it's just not JUST because of anxiety most of the time#i was scrambling to find a way to cancel to no avail and the bank messaged me about potential fraud#so i panicked and reported it as fraudulent in the hopes it would cancel the transaction#but of course they called me so i confessed it was actually me that did it just not on purpose#the employee was very sympathetic and patient bless her but unable to help me besides giving another number to call#so i spent the evening wallowing in shame and sending phone calls and emails (which i have a fear of so that's not dandy)#so that happened#ded memes#ded shenanigans#fuslie#valkyrae#tinakitten#kkatamina#side note i like yvonne's sweater#ludwig#ellum#yes i'm just tagging all of them until i run out of space i've come this far#sykkuno#brofain#yvonnie#tales of going into debt#still sweating#yukine
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A young Peter Wyngarde guests as journalist Andrea Bakolas (a fictionalised version of the real Gregorios Staktopoulos) in Overseas Press Club - Exclusive!: The George Polk Case (1.9, ABPC, 1957)
#fave spotting#peter wyngarde#overseas press club exclusive!#jason king#classic tv#1957#abpc#the george polk case#gregorios staktopoulos#george polk#for more on this strange little series see the tags on a prev alfred burke fave spotting post#i mentioned at that time my doubts that all of these stories were quite as 'torn from the headlines' as the narrator would have us believe#but this one is certainly true: george polk was a real american journalist and he was really murdered in Greece during the civil war there#that part is certainly delivered fairly accurately; it is‚ however‚ kind of background to this old tv dramatisation of events#which is more concerned with capturing the guilty party (SPOILERS ig for a near 70yr old show nobody will watch lol): it's Peter of course#but that's where we hit a weird snag; bc his character here is again very much (for once) based on a real person‚ Gregorios Staktopoulos#but Gregorios' confession was almost certainly obtained via torture‚ not the play of wits shown here; his conviction was also‚ to say the#least‚ unsafe. evidence brought in that trial has been shown to be false‚ and it's actually debated now that Polk was not killed by the#Communist forces (whom Gregorios worked with) at all‚ but by right wing elements affiliated with the Greek government... as recently as#2004 his widow was campaigning for a posthumous retrial to clear his name. so yes an unfortunate footnote in old tv: when you#actually DO try to tell a true story‚ just be aware that the facts you're taking as true may not always be what they appear#the real Gregorios was indeed sentenced to life in prison as in this ep‚ but some relief there in that his sentence was reduced and#(perhaps in recognition of the shady legalities surrounding his conviction) he was released in 1960 and returned to work as a journalist#the George Polk Awards for american journalism are still given today which is nice#imdb list this ep as The George Polk Story but the onscreen title is definitely Case
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The huntlow ship is blander than flour and has less chemistry than tap water from a white suburban neighborhood. But because it involves an angsty white boy, 70% of fans, who needed to have the words "representation" and "subtext" taken away until they knew how to use them properly, immediately started foaming at the mouth to beam their self insert into the brain of willow park to be hunters tradwife, neoliberal edition.
#not including main tags bc this is just me grumping#shut up pandora#<=i dont care if you copy most of my tags but if you copy that one im blocking you and i hope you get swarmed by bees#this is a huntlowphobic blog btw if huntlow shippers wanna be oppressed so bad ill do it#if you follow me and like huntlow good on you but im blocking the tag and anything to do with the tag#and if you try to say huntlow things at me unless youre one of very few mutuals i will assume you have bad taste and ignore it#basically i saw a poll today for a 'best tumblr couple' contest and huntlow was winning over fucking DESTIEL#destiel? the homophobic gay love confession? the 15 years of buildup? the breaking news template that weve been using for 2 years now?#i dont even know about supernatural and i know destiel it came free with being a tumblr user#and its being outvoted by a ship where they...stand next to each other?#and...had two conversations over the course of 10 episodes?#and...have random blushes where it doesnt fit?#sorry guys! your ship is bad and so is your taste!#there are a select few hardcore shippers ive come across who actually get their personalities right#but for most of you? this aint it chief
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.
#Went to Confession (again)#am still at my most miserable and confused#look I am aware I cannot ask of the priest to tell me <<oh that was only a venial sin you needn't mind>>#but it's also just really freaking hard when you just cannot tell a venial sin from a mortal one#and I know - I know - if you looked at it my attitude towards life is pretty dumb#to write a scathing report: i view life as a path of least resistance. I'm governed either by whims or by fear#which means I have no middle perspective. It's either what's easier now or being afraid of hell#I hardly pay any attention to matters like health or whatever. if I wasn't afraid of sin I wouldn't care about how things impact my mind#If I wasn't afraid of sin I'd have read Game of Thrones or whatever. and of course I would feel unimaginably dirty afterwards. but at least#I'd have read something interesting right? /s#oh and also I'm literally Emma Bovary minus the adultery but that's a different issue#mostly. some of it is probably more connected than obvious at first glance#I'm miserable and it's not even the sort of misery you can make poetry about.#only scathing character portraits. if i was a character from a novel you would hate me#(i would find the novel boring. mundane. there's nothing romantic in this)#(i wouldn't *prefer* to deal with wars - death of everyone you've known - unbreakable badly worded vows or whatever.#but it makes for better stories)#but again you would hate me in mine#//#therese rambles#therese is in an emotional hole#possibly more than emotional but that's the tag
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you're fucking Going Through It right now, heart hurts and there are so many questions and so few answers, but your best friend (who is a wolf) or group of best friends (who is your pack) is incredibly supportive. they want you to be happy. they lov you so fucking much. they are here for you. they have your back no matter what board
x x x x x x x x x
kindly credit if you repost the gifs I made-
#✨coping✨#stim stuff#wolves#take me here#mowgli: lgend of the jungle#bhoot#gray brother#comfort#in the first row they are greeting you or asking how you are#in the second row you are venting and they are listening to you#in the third row they are responding to you. each in a different way#one affirming or advising you#another just offering comfort company or solace. they're telling you they're here for you#just Being There y'know? a grounding presence#the third is being your number 1 cheerleader telling you they know you'll pull through because you're the best. or cheering you up perhaps#and their response styles in the third row align with how I've presented each over the course of the first two rows! C:#they each represent a sort of friend archetype. one optimist cheerleader one voice of reason one a quiet listener#i am just. very soft for 2 of these characters and. very soft for my crafty arrangement of the rows and. 🥺🥺🥺#..... I should probably just confess at this point. admit it to myself and like. I don't know y'know lmao#anyway well. going to t e n t a t i v e l y add the remaining tags.#*quietly following a sigh* okay. okay just type them. just.. type them like. put them there#wolfkin#wolf therian#wolf theriotype#canine kin#canine therian#except I ! I don't even know for sure what all of these are and I'm not NECESSARILY /any/ of them at all and#honestly I just feel like the crowds in these tags would like this !!#guiltyedits
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One last moment. One last touch.
#hm i should make an original art tag#destiel#destiversary#destiversary s15#spn fanart#dean winchester#castiel#non looping gif#full art that is static and will not go away hidden under the read more!#yes lamp. cas is the lamp.#and of course. confession scene#happy 12 years of destiel there's one day left <3
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