#and now i have to keep waiting? and do another phone call to prod your system/business into doing what they've advertised to do??

[vermillioncrown]

nothing more devastating than an errand that results in a giant quest chain...

[shotmrmiller]

when the video on your phone freezes for a heartbeat, just a fraction of a second, you're jolted back to reality.

and then it begins to vibrate in your hand. you stare at the screen, eyes squinting against the unforgiving glow that pierces the darkness you're enveloped in. (had been, anyway.)

in the corner of it says 2:03 am. witching hour. when the world holds its breath. everyone except for him. as always.

the same man who couldn't fit you into his meticulously curated world for longer than a night; a world where emotions were ruthlessly shoved into a cardboard box and labeled non-essential. (yet dogs you endlessly.)

the phone continues to ring, vibration buzzing like a mosquito in your ear. you run through your very limited options. ignore it and you'll have to suffer with him having nothing better to do than cause you to lose sleep because you need the alarm to go off in the morning or pick up and let him prod at old wounds with his gloved fingers.

(fingers you wish were curling inside you again, pad of his thumb rubbing on your aching-)

this isn't the first time he's disrupted your peace using an unknown number and it isn't the first time you answer despite knowing you shouldn't.

maybe in another life you'll have better self control.

(your masturbation session will have to wait.)

before you even get a word out, he's already cutting you off. "pet. didn't wake ya, did i?"

insufferable fucking man. "you know what time it is. what do you want, Simon? here i thought blocking both your number and johnny's would get the point across." you hope your tone conveys the weariness better on his end than it did on yours.

he merely hums, a disinterested noise that ripples through the phone. you're tempted to hang up but you know the script. he'll just call. again. and again. and again.

"were ya watchin' our video again?" heat spreads up from your neck to the soft of your cheeks. there's no way he knew what you were doing before picking up. pure mortifying happenstance.

"i was." a tight breath warms the inner side of your wrist. he's always been a straight shooter which on him is both a strength and a flaw, and right now, with the way his voice carries over the phone, it's your weakness. good thing he's not here to notice the way you squeeze your thighs together.

"'nd it got me to thinkin' on how sweet you'd been then, bleary eyed 'nd pliant beneath me," your lower stomach burns white-hot, knowing the exact type of filth he likes to talk when he's in this kind of mood, "how thin i had your pussy stretched 'round me."

your core pulses at the memory of him resting against the firm seal of your womb, his work-worn palm pressing your stomach, as if trying to feel himself from the outside. (maybe he could, maybe he couldn't, you wouldn't know. not when he had you sitting on his lap as his own personal cock sleeve for longer than you deemed necessary. you'd been incoherent then.)

with liquid heat flowing through your veins, prickling at your fingertips, burning behind your eyelids, doing what he says next had never been easier.

"take your shorts off 'touch tha' pretty pussy f'me."

(you'd disconnected all the cameras in your room except for the one you didn't know was there. he's gotta keep a sharp eye on what's his, yknow? of course not, how could you? as far as you're concerned, he's just coincidentally calling when your hand is weaving downward to rub the little bundle of nerves between your legs with a home video he'd recorded of him fucking you stupid one tipsy night playing on your phone.)

[wileys-russo]

the perfect tree II m.earps x reader

another little mearps christmas fic based around this request here

the perfect tree II m.earps x reader

"-yes mum i'll be there on the wednesday." you sighed, shuddering as a shiver ran down your spine as a singular icy drop of water slipped down your neck from one of the branches above you.

"-yes dad i'll be there on the tuesday. because i still have a few things to wrap up here!" mary groaned, catching herself as her footing slipped on the icy ground, the small trip worsening her already stressed mood.

"can we talk about this later? i'm trying to pick a tree mum." you requested withholding the urge to snap at her millions of questions, still trying to survey the trees around you for the 'one'.

"i'm a little busy right now, no please don't put mum on! i'm trying to pick a christmas tree up and she'll talk for-oh hi mum." mary paused and punched the air pulling a face as her mum began to ramble on.

"-no mum i will not be bringing someone with me." you sighed, exhausted at the never ending poking and prodding about your dating life. "that is none of your business!" you scoffed as your mum started to question if you were 'putting yourself out there enough'.

"yes i can get the turkey. mum its weeks away can we not talk about it a little closer to?" mary asked, eyes drawn to a tree a few up in the aisle as they widened happily, ignoring her mums ranting about how you can never be too prepared for christmas.

"-no mum i do not want to be set up with anyone, especially not one of your work friends daughters. please just leave me and my love life to be my own!" you moaned, kicking at a rock with a roll of your eyes, though they lit up seeing the perfect tree a few feet away.

you and mary both hummed at your parents words, half paying attention as unknowingly you both made a beeline for the same tree, on opposite sides of it you didn't even see one another coming, a barrage of trees keeping your intentions hidden.

"its perfect!" "thats just the one."

you jumped hearing another voice, peering around the tree and letting out a small yelp of shock as a girl who couldn't have been much older than you did the same, the two of you jolting in surprise.

"sorry, this ones taken." you smiled politely, one hand firmly holding onto one of the branches. "yeah it is, sorry." the girl gave you a smile of her own, hand holding onto a different branch as both of your eyes narrowed.

"mum i'll call you later." "mum i've gotta go."

with that your eyes narrowed even further, slipping your phone into your coat pockets. "i think you'll find i saw this one first." your tone was sweet but your eyes warned the girl off of arguing with you, though that did very little to derail her.

"i think you'll find that i touched it first, universal rule." she also smiled sweetly but her eyebrows remained furrowed together as your eyes locked in a stand off.

the girl seemed vaguely familiar but you couldn't quite pinpoint where from, she was head and shoulders taller than you and bundled up in layer on layer just like you were with the sudden bitter cold snap settling in.

feeling yet another few drops of icy water slip down the back of your neck you were snapped out of this strange stand off and reminded of your age, so with a shake of your head you removed your hand.

"you're right, you saw it first. merry christmas!" you gave her a much more sincere smile, internally hitting yourself for causing a fuss with a stranger over something so silly this time of year, you had a hundred other things to worry about.

"hey wait!" you frowned as she let go of the tree and instead grabbed your wrist, dropping it right away and mumbling an apology, cheeks flushed bright red though you weren't sure if it was embarrassment or from the cold.

"you take it. i don't know what came over me so be so immature over a tree, stressful time of year." the girl smiled apologetically, shoving her hands in her coat and rocking back and forth on her heels.

"tell me about it. but no you take it, really! season of giving right?" you assured her, and marys stomach did a flip at the way you continued to smile at her, a strange feeling settling over her which she assumed was the cause of her next move.

"help me decorate it then?"

you gave her a perplexed look at her statement. "sorry?" you weren't sure if you'd even heard her correctly. "god that came out so much creepier than i intended. i'm mary!" she beamed, holding out a gloved hand which you shook, giving her your own name in return.

"i meant to say would you like to help me decorate it then? it really is a perfect tree and since you've been so kind as to give it up i think the least i can do is give you the opportunity to make sure its treated and decorated as it deserves." mary smiled warmly, raising an eyebrow in your direction, waving over one of the workers over your shoulder.

"mm its a nice tree that definitely deserves to be treated right, but my parents raised me not to go home with strangers." you spared her a teasing grin, a little enamored at her response but also cautious around the fact you didn't know this girl from any other random on the street.

"smart parents. theres a little cafe just around the corner from here, how about we get a hot chocolate and some lunch and become not strangers?" mary gave you a wolfish grin, thanking the worker who cut down the tree and started to drag it away to be wrapped.

"are you asking me on a date?" you asked with an amused smile, never being one to shy away from asking somewhat blunt questions if it meant you got an honest answer.

"you know what yeah, yeah i am."

~

it would appear the two of you had a lot more in common than you thought as conversation flowed so much so that you were asked to leave the cafe since they were closing, both of you blushing bright red not having realised the time or that you'd been sitting here now for almost four and a half hours together.

exchanging numbers you'd agreed to meet up the following day, agreeing you now were no longer strangers you took up marys offer of helping her decorate the tree, the girl having helped you pick out your own shortly after hers was wrapped and ready to go.

which is how you found yourself now here in her home surrounded by boxes of decorations and ornaments, still a little in disbelief you'd only met her yesterday and here you were.

but mary seemed to have a knack for making you feel at ease in her company. the tall girl constantly cracking jokes and sprinkling in the occasional smooth compliment or awful pick up line to continue your laughter, a sound which was fast becoming like a drug for her.

"-oh now this is cute!" you laughed as you carefully pulled out the ornament from one of the many boxes littered around marys living room.

the ornament in question was clearly something of sentiment, a little frame made of popsicle sticks, glitter glue and tufts of tinsel with a photo of a gap toothed smiley young girl inside which you could only guess was mary herself.

"oh look you found the angel!" mary grinned taking it from you and pretending to put it on top of the tree as you nudged her with your shoulder. "you used to be adorable, what happened?" you frowned as mary gasped and instead held the frame up right by her face.

"scuse you. look at this! from cute to hot." she winked making you roll your eyes playfully as mary hung it on the tree, the two of you chattering away as christmas music softly played in the background.

"you have so many beautiful sentimental ornaments mary." you smiled softly, pulling out a red bauble that read marys first christmas, the gold lettering quite faded though still legible.

"what you mean your parents christmas trees growing up weren't shrines dedicated to you? what a crime." the girl tutted with a shake of her head.

"to my younger siblings maybe. i like to think i was the tester child, everything that went wrong with me they learned from and made sure not to repeat!" you sighed with a small chuckle, moving behind to the back of the tree, always stubborn in the fact that the entire tree should be decorated no matter if easily seen or not.

"but no shrines no. i used to make ornaments in school, but my mums always been very picky about the colour scheme of our entire house so anything that wasn't store bought and the right shade of coral or rose gold never made the cut." you shrugged, having grown up with christmas's done differently than most of your friends.

"oh i'm sorry! i didn't realise-" marys cheeks flushed bright pink and she started quickly to ramble out an apology which you were even faster to wave off.

"you don't need to be sorry, please! she's gotten less strict with it as we all grew up, though she still insists on throwing a huge christmas eve party for all of her friends where everyone seems to parades their kids and their accomplishments or careers all round like show ponies, as if they had anything to do with them!" you laughed with a shake of your head, marys face softening.

both of you were far to invested in one another to even hear the knocks at the front door. "oh look! mistletoe." mary grinned pulling out a small wad of plastic green and red and wiggling her eyebrows.

"sorry i don't kiss pretty not quite strangers until at least the second or third date!" you teased. "so you admit i'm pretty then!" mary beamed wiggling her body happily making you laugh again.

"mm and humble too." you squeezed her bicep and moved to hang something but not quite able to reach the branch as you felt mary move behind you, stretching out to help you as your heart admittedly hammered a little faster at the close proximity.

"mary! are ya deaf or what?" the two of you leapt away from one another as two younger girls came barreling into the living room, the taller of the two stepping right into an empty box and crashing to the floor.

"alessia!" mary groaned, rushing over to help her as the girl beside her doubled over with laughter and mary pulled the blonde up to her feet mumbling about how she was a walking safety hazard.

"oh sorry we didn't realise you had company." the blonde noticed you over marys shoulder and raised an eyebrow, the girl beside her ceasing her laughter as you shifted awkwardly under their narrowed eyes.

"whose this then?" the other girl questioned mary with a nod in your direction as if you weren't there. "what are you two doing here? what have i said about using my spare key to let yourselves in!" mary scolded, smacking the shorter of the two on the shoulder who whined and rubbed it with a scowl.

"we were going to watch the holiday and go look at lights, remember?" the blonde prompted as mary winced, having completely forgotten about the plans she'd made with her friends a few days ago, her mind lately being completely occupied by you.

"hey you don't need to go! you could stay?" mary noticed you grab your coat and spun around, staring at you hopefully as the two girls behind her continued to look you up and down as you shook your head.

"it's okay you have plans. i should get going anyway i've got a few things to do." you smiled sincerely, mary offering to walk you out and ignoring the unsubtle hushed questioning of who you were from the two girls who she ordered to sit down and wait for her.

"i'm really sorry about all this, i completely forgot about them coming over and-" "mary stop saying sorry, you apologize far too much for things you don't need to." you smiled with amusement, pulling your beanie on and stepping out of her front door, mary lingering in the doorway.

"can i see you again? soon?" she asked quickly, shoving her hands in the pockets of her hoodie as you nodded. "i'd like that. you've got my number, feel free to use it!" and with another dazzling smile sent her way, you were gone.

returning inside mary felt like she was floating, no one having had this sort of effect on her since she was a teenager, the keeper almost feeling juvenile for her apparent growing crush on you.

"mary you have some serious explaining to do!"

~

one year later.

"you ready for this?" you asked with a smile, the girl beside you nodding and leaning to sweetly peck your lips before shutting off the engine.

"god its fucking freezing." your teeth chattered as you stepped out of the car and opened the boot, grabbing out the bag of presents which the tall blonde was quick to take from you, silencing your protests with another kiss as you fixed her scarf and sent her a smile which still made her stomach do a flip.

"lets do this then."

hand in hand you made your way carefully up the perfectly shoveled driveway, pointing out to the girl beside you all the decorations and recounting their origins often with a roll of your eyes as she hung off your every word.

"no knocking?" "no point, they won't hear." you chuckled as you let yourself in, the door unlocked anyway as you felt the girl beside you grip your hand a little tighter and you lead her further inside the house and closer to the voices in the living room.

"darling! you made it. oh gosh and this must finally be-"

"merry christmas mum. and yes this is mary, my girlfriend."

[reevesdriver]

Mr. Dutton: Part 2 (NSFW)

Anon request: "John Dutton X reader have been dating for a while now and they’re sneaking around the house like teenagers, but they get caught by Beth. They could be caught making out in his office late and she barges in."

Word count: 996 (Bit short I know)

Reader: Female reader

Character(s): John Dutton

Warning(s): NSFW / 🔥🔥🔥 / Smut / Secret Relationship / Shower Sex / Dads Best Friend /

Support Me: Kofi

Part 1

Ever since that heated night where you took your best friends dad for the ride of his life John was unable to keep his hands off you. A few subtle glances here and some touching there drove the both of you mad. A few weeks had passed since that night and you hadn't had the chance to spend time with one another since the house was almost always full.

After a long morning of tending to the horses and doing housework around the Dutton ranch you opted for a hot shower to wash all the dirt and grime off of you. The house was empty, aside from John who was sat in his office on the phone to someone. Deciding not to disturb him whilst he was on a call you turned the shower on and waited for it to get warm before stripping your clothes and jumping in under the spray of water.

You looked down at the grime and first that was being rinsed down the plughole when you heard the bathroom door opening. "John?" You ask to the figure on the other side of the glass.

The sound of heavy fabric hitting the floor made your cheeks flush red and soon your question was answered when John pulled open the door to the shower and stepped inside, immediately embracing you. "You could've told me you were havin' a shower darlin', I would've joined you sooner."

"You were on the phone, didn't want to disturb you."

He hummed. "I'd rather be with you than dealing with bullshit." He says before kissing you softly. "Been a while since we've had anytime to ourselves."

His hands wander from around your body down to your waist and then over the curve of your ass where he grabs handfuls of the flesh pulling you against his body roughly. You feel his hardened cock prodding your soft belly, running a hand from his back you traced his sides before taking a hold of his cock in your palm.

"Quit teasing' me." John hissed as you gently squeezed his length. You laugh and in an instant he has your legs wrapped around him and your back pinned to the wall of the shower. His cock is sheathed inside of you and your arms instinctively wrap around the back of his neck as he manages to life you up and down on his length.

He may not look it but John was a strong man. Years working on the ranch had worked in his favour and you knew that you didn't have to worry about him dropping you as he fucked you harder. "C'mon baby." He says between pants and kisses. You clench around his cock as you cum and John follows soon after, his seed dripping out of you when he pulls his cock from your throbbing pussy.

The pair of you share more kisses in-between getting each other washed under the spray of water before eventually John drags you out of the bathroom to get dried and dressed. You slip into some comfy clothes and dump your dirtied ones into the laundry basket ready to be washed later on.

Later that day, when the house was clean and you'd finished putting your laundry away you found yourself walking to Johns office. With a gentle knock at the door you heard his gruff voice call from the other side telling you to enter, John sat at his desk with a cup of coffee in his hand. His cowboy hat had been taken off and placed beside a stack of papers that slowly piled up on his desk.

"Hey darlin'" He said with a smile as he sat back in his chair and watched as you closed the door and crossed the room. Picking his black hat up you dropped it on your head and sat perched on the edge of his desk in front of him. His hands immediately wrapped around your frame and you pulled him to your chest. "You're lookin' mighty stressed again John, anything I can do to help?" You say with a smirk.

"I'm sure there's a few things you could do for me." He laughs and you hum in content. Lifting his head from your chest John moves to capture your lips with his, he stands and pulls you off the desk and to your feet so he can hold you against his body easier. The height difference between the two of you barely affects the kiss since you stand on your tip-toes to reach him.

Your breathing deepens and as you press yourself to him the pair of you fail to hear the thudding of boots as Johns only daughter, and your best friend, storms her way to the office with a determined look on her face. “Daddy I can’t even tell you how mad I am.” She says entering the office. You jolt away from one another and turn to face the youngest Dutton who isn’t at all fazed with what was in front of her.

You stare at her, like a dear caught in the headlights and Beth laughs. "Don't look so worried, I already knew you two had a thing going on. You might wanna be quiet next time you're fucking."

Heat rises to your cheeks in embarrassment and you quickly return Johns hat to the spot on the desk that you took it from. Moving from your lover you hastily leave the room and head back to your own and shut the door behind you. Throwing yourself on your bed you stare at the wooden beams spreading across the ceiling when there's a knock at your door.

As you sit up the door opens and Beth takes a step into the room. "Beth, I-I'm sorry. I should've told you sooner." You stammer out an apology and she smiles.

"You've nothin' to apologise for, not seen my daddy so happy in a long while. Just don't break his heart."

"I won't."

[straykids-97]

Mirror, Mirror

Synopsis: You push Lee Know over the edge, and now you’re faced with your reflections…

Warnings: pet names, soft!dom Lee Know, slight choking, exhibitionism; if you squint, mirror sex, unprotected sex. (Lmk if I forgot anything)

W.C: 1.8k

Quote: ‘The face is a mirror of the mind, and the eyes without speaking confess the secrets of the heart.’ St. Jerome

You had been teasing Minho all day, knowing full well that if you continued, things wouldn’t end well. Part of that thrilled you, knowing Minho would be very upset later. A shiver ran down your spine when he glared at you, giving you your final warning. “If you keep this up pet,” he leaned in and pulled your face close to his, “there’s a bathroom counter with your name on it.” Excitement raced through your veins, you had successfully flustered him to the point of no return. You knew that if you continued to prod at him, he would keep his threat and you would indeed end up bent over the vanity in the dorm’s bathroom. You were deep in contemplation as Changbin sauntered up to you sleepily, “Lee Know hyung is mad.” He grumbled, running his hand through his fluffy hair. You scoff, smiling at him as he moved around you to the stairs, “I’m going to bed. Goodnight.” They all were tired from practice, and tonight, Changbin looked exceptionally exhausted. “Goodnight Binnie! Sleep well!” You call after him as he leaves you on the first floor. “Goodnight, y/n. See you in the morning.” He replies, shutting his door behind him. 

Lee Know had been in Chan’s room gathering some clothes that Chan had borrowed so that they could be washed; Chan’s room was next to Bin’s, so Lee Know had heard you use the playful nickname for Changbin that everyone used. Any other night, it wouldn’t have set Lee Know off, but tonight, because you had been annoying him all day, it was the straw that broke the camel’s back. 

You moved to the couch to watch TV as Lee Know descended the stairs to take the laundry to the wash. He dropped the basket beside the washer and silently moved over to where you were sitting, studying you before saying, “Gather your stuff so we can leave. I’m throwing the laundry in the wash and then we can go to yours.” You nod your head, eyes focused on the show in front of you. Lee Know decides to ignore the fact that you didn’t acknowledge him, knowing full well that you’ll be getting yours in a matter of 20 or so minutes. So, calmly, he goes to start his laundry. 

As you didn’t have much to bring home, it didn’t take you long to slip your shoes on along with your jacket. You didn’t bring your purse as you knew you wouldn’t need it, but you did have to find your phone. “Minho!” you call, searching around the sofas, “Do you know where my phone is?” 

“No, did you look in my room?” He asked from the opposite room. “I don’t remember having it in your room.” You murmur, walking up the stairs to search Lee Know’s room quickly. Since his room was clean, it didn’t take long for you to search for your missing phone. Much to your surprise, it was on his desk. You sigh, “Huh,” you say to yourself, “odd.” You shake your head and walk back down the stairs where Minho was waiting for you. “Did you find it?” He asked, his eyes landing on the phone in your hand, “Yeah. It was in your room… I just never remember bringing it in there…” you trail off, shaking your head as you follow behind him to the door. Being the gentleman that he was, he held the door open so that you could walk out, closing it quietly behind him. 

     Lee Know drove silently to your apartment, another odd occurrence. Typically, Lee Know wasn’t very quiet around you. Picking up on the strange happening sent electricity through your veins. Doing your best, you try to suppress the shutter that caused you to shiver. If Lee Know noticed, he didn’t say anything about it. 

He parked on the curb and climbed out, you followed suit and closed your door behind you. Lee Know came to your side, wrapping his hand around your wrist. You look up at him, startled; he normally held your hand when he walked you to your door. He practically drags you up the stairs and pushed the door open without saying a word. You take your jacket off and kick your shoes off beside his. Lee Know was already in your living room, his muscular back facing you. You gulp as he pulls the fabric over his head, slowly turning to you. “You’ve tried my patience, all day…” he trails off, wadding his shirt up and tossing it onto the couch. “I’ve been far more patient with you than you deserve…” his eyes slowly rake up your body and you try as hard as you can to not shift under his gaze. “But,” he cocks his head to the side, “a man can try so much before he’s reached his breaking point.” He undoes the snap of his watch band and sets it very carefully on the coffee table by his legs. 

He flicked his first two fingers at you, motioning you forward. You find it in yourself to finally move after a few moments, standing a foot away from him as he eyed you. Lee Know rose his hands to the hem of your baggy shirt, pulling it gently over your head. He was taking his time, knowing that every second he took leading up to the moment you had been waiting for, would be the best form of torture he could give you. You hadn’t when he dragged things out, teased you, brought you to the edge, and left you high and dry, only to do it again and again and again. He loved to see you frustrated, and whiny. He loved to see angry tears form in your eyes; as long as they were caused by him, he didn’t care. 

He especially loved when you whined his real name; that only happened when you wanted to get his attention. That’s when he knew you had had enough. It was like your safe word almost. 

You were drawn from your jumbled thoughts when his cool fingertips brushed up the small of your back to where your bra was, easily unsnapping it and allowing your breasts to fall free. He hummed to himself, before bowing his head and sucking your flesh between his teeth, biting softly. You let out a soft groan, holding onto his biceps for dear life as he took his turn in teasing you. “You’re going to regret earilier, kitten.” he hummed, looking down at his handy work in the form of purple flesh. He moved his hands further down your waist, pushing his hands through the fabric of your pants, and shoved them to your knees. You kicked them off, knowing he was going to make you do it in a few moments. 

He wasted no time and grabbed you by the wrist and guided you down your hallway, pausing in front of the bathroom. “I warned you,” he spoke, flipping the light on and tugging you inside. You gasp when he pushes you against the vanity, gripping your thighs as he hauled you on top of the cool marble surface. His hand was on your throat, squeezing slightly as he presses against you, “you would be bent over the counter, did I not?” he hummed, running his thumb across your bottom lip. You whimper softly, “Minho,” you watch as he closes his eyes and basks in your plea. “Oh no,” he chuckled darkly, “you’re not getting out of this so easily, kitten.” He leans into your face, his hot breath fanning across your cheeks as he speaks, “you teased me all day long, it’s my turn.” 

With that, he flips you around so that your face is nearly pressed against the mirror of your bathroom, faced with both of your reflections. His dark eyes shifted to your bare rear, your eyes followed his as he skimmed your body until his gaze found yours staring back at him. He grins like a fox, leaning in to kiss the space between your shoulder blades. You mewl, shifting as he presses his groin into yours, grinding his hips teasingly against yours. He nips the skin behind your ear as he rolls his hips against yours as you panted, “Minho, please.” your voice was higher pitched than normal because you had teased him all day; seeing him get frustrated with you made you turned on, it’s why you did it. He groaned, hearing his name fall from your lips was making him lose focus on the task at hand. You wanted to keep teasing him, but your submissive side was beginning to show and you wanted nothing more than to please Lee Know, to show him that his pretty brat could also be his sweet, little angel. 

His ragged breathing mixed with your whines filled the space until he pulled away. You gasp, turning around to look at him, startled by the sudden loss of friction. You were about to plead with him, but stopped when he pulled his sweats down enough to allow his painful erection to spring out. He lazily drags his hand up and down his length before putting his hand against your back, pressing you into the counter. You whimper, feeling him drag himself up and down your core before he gently pressed the tip inside of you. You both groan, the sensation of teasing each other finally becoming too much to bear. 

“Fuck,” He groans, pressing himself into you; he was going to tease you, but he was losing grip on reality. You gasp, feeling him fill you completely until his hips were pressed against yours. You mewl in pleasure as he shifts, rolling his hips perfectly each time. You lull your head against your arm, feeling drunk on his cock already. Judging by the lack of speech coming from your boyfriend, he too felt the same. You whine, holding his wrist as the tightening feeling in your groin began to worsen. You were close, and so was he. 

“Y/n,” Lee Know panted, his thrusts growing sloppy, “say my name, please.” He whimpered, making you moan in reply. “Please.” He repeated. “Minho- ah.” You gasp, the tip of his member rubbing your g-spot perfectly. He leans over you, his right hand pressing down on the counter beside your head. When Lee Know got close, he liked to be flush against you; something that he desired to feel closer to you in your intimate encounters, regardless of how kinky they were. “Minho!” Your head was swimming, blurred by the way Lee Know snapped his hips against yours. You held onto his wrist as he picked up the pace, the knot in your groin finally snapping. 

You let out a final loud whine and come undone around him. Lee Know wastes no time and quickly follows behind you, moaning into your neck. You shudder, feeling the warmth of him spread through your womb. You stay linked for a moment before Lee Know pulls out, tugging you up to face him. He runs a hand gently through your hair, “Fuck, y/n,” he gingerly presses a kiss to your lips. “As much as you teasing me angers me…” he trails off, pulling away to lick his lips, “it's always rewarding for the both of us.” 

I haven't seen many stories/drabbles of Lee Know lately so I'm showing the King some love <3 Anyway, please lmk if you wanna be tagged in a future post!

©️straykids-97

[aching-tummies]

"I think I ate too much..."

"Let me rub it, it'll help" proceeds to NOT help at all, being a little too rough on the tummy

Thank you so, so, so much for this! This one in particular has been a little gem that I've been revisiting since it showed up in my inbox. I'm a total sucker for sadistic tummy-kink and have been saving this one, wanting to do it justice before posting it.

I know I kind of left it on a cliffhanger. Honestly, I couldn't decide what to do at the point I cut it off here ^^ Either option sounded amazing. So...yeah...I'm going to leave an open invitation to send in a continuation response to this one if anyone wants to take me up on that ^^

I shift my bag on my shoulder, bringing the little messenger bag in front of me. We've got some time, this intersection is notorious for being ridiculously timed. I tug on my bag-strap, ensuring that my bag is in a good position, shielding my left hand from view. I've had it pressed to my stomach since we left the restaurant. My stomach churns painfully as the pedestrian light changes and we cross in a hurry. It's timed poorly, so we always have to sprint in order to make it to the other end or risk the embarrassment of being stranded on the little concrete island or whatever in the middle of all the lanes of traffic. The sudden jog is agony on my tummy, packed as full as it is. I feel like I'm lugging an unsecured watermelon strapped to my front. My stomach is jam-packed and bumping awkwardly (and painfully) around inside of my torso. I press my left hand harder against my stomach, desperately trying to quell the over-full ache without breaking pace. Nausea joins the party and I feel something hot and sour lapping it's way up my esophagus. As we reach the other sidewalk, I fight to keep my breathing under control and I bite my tongue harshly to prevent a moan from being audible. With that short sprint, my stomach went from "slightly uncomfortable" to "DAMN THIS HURTS!".

We make it across and go back to a walking pace--our goal being the bus stop on this block. Thank heaven for that--I don't think I could manage another intersection-sprint. My stomach aches so much right now that a sharp jab or another jostling may be enough to burst it or at least make me vomit. I'm so, so, so frickin' full that it hurts.

As we near the stop, I use my phone and look up the up-coming bus times.

"Ugh…next one's in forty." I call out to you as I settle on the rigid bench, dragging my bag onto my lap to hide my aching belly.

"Forty? Wanna duck into a shop?" You suggest. I quickly shake my head. Entering a shop means more walking and I don't want to be on my feet or moving with my stomach so full and achy.

"Nah. I'll wait here. You can go if you want to though."

I'm hoping you'll go and that I can tend to my stomach out of your view. We both have a thing for tummies in distress and we've shared that with each other. When we plan it, I'm totally on-board for a private tummy-kink session at home. I'm not so on-board with it all when it's in public or in front of company. I also know from experience that you're 100% the sadistic lover of my dreams. Your goal is always to push my stomach--literally--and get rough with it. We both love the sounds it makes when we get rough with it. The whiny grumbles and high-pitched whines as it is forcefully churned and prodded at. We're at a bus stop right now and I feel ridiculously full. Like…full to the point that I'm honestly terrified that I won't be able to hold it all down. I've got a small stomach capacity and I rarely ever indulge to the point of fullness, so my stomach is struggling under the weight of all that we put into it just now. We went to a noodle place in the area that's known for their large portions. It definitely lived up to it's name, with the bowl of noodles I got being about 2.5 times what I'd normally consume in a single sitting. The soup-base was delicious too so I definitely drank the broth…and am currently regretting it. My stomach was already packed-full with the sheer amount of noodles, veggies, and meat in the bowl. Chasing it all down with roughly a litre of hot broth filled my stomach beyond capacity, resulting in a very uncomfortable stretch. If there were any empty pockets in there, it all got flooded with the sheer volume of broth near the end of the meal. Based on what I felt inside of me while making that mad dash across the intersection, there really isn't any room inside of my stomach. The mass of noodles didn't tumble around inside the broth so much as jiggle and jostle like a sludgy mass inside of my over-burdened stomach.

I'm not used to eating so much in a single sitting and my stomach is at a loss for how to handle such a large glut of food. Digestion isn't happening normally and it feels like my stomach forgot how to release it's contents into my intestines. Or, who knows, maybe my intestines are just as stuffed as my aching stomach is.

To my surprise (and dread), you plop down on the bench right next to me.

"A-Aren't you gonna duck into a shop?" I ask.

"Hmm? Nah. I'll wait. Plus, there's something far more interesting here." If I could focus on anything other than how sickeningly full my tummy is, I'd have seen your sly grin. "Hmm…what do we have here?" You ask slyly, nudging my bag aside and poking at my left arm--currently pressed against my stomach.

"Ah…uhm…" I was really hoping it'd escape your notice. A wet burble crescendos, audible between the two of us. I swallow back against the warm liquid fighting its way up my esophagus. I fail to bite back a moan as my stomach cramps harshly, a wave of pure pain coursing through my stomach like a wave crashing onto the shore. I close my eyes, my moan tapering off into a whimper as I abandon being discreet and rub my stomach frantically with both of my hands. "Nnngh…i-it hurts…" I mumble, tears prickling my lashes as the pain in my stomach intensifies. "I think…ooooh….I-I think I--ah!--nnngh…t-too much…nnnnnnnngh…" I squeeze my stomach with both of my hands, regretting the action instantly as I feel something breech into my esophagus against the pressure. My stomach burbles angrily as the swallowed contents tumble back into the cramped space.

"Hmm? Come again?" You play coy, your fingers dancing along my arm.

"Nnngh…a-ate…t-too much…h-hurts…" I choke out. The wave of pain begins to ebb, but I know there will be another. I let out a breath and release my grip around my stomach, rubbing it gently with both of my thumbs.

"Awww…here, let me rub it. It'll help." You don't even wait for permission. Your hands join mine on my bloated stomach. Despite being so painfully distended, it really doesn't show all that much. I'm somewhere between 'skinny' and 'chubby' on the appearances scale, with my body's fat-distribution being pretty spread out so I'm not noticeably chunky in one area or another. Because of that, even though I feel ready to burst, you wouldn't be able to tell if your palm wasn't directly on my jam-packed belly. My abdomen has no give to it. It's firm under our palms, having about as much give as a recently-inflated bicycle tire. There's the usual fleshy give that stems from the fact that it's flesh and internal organs we're pressing into…but my stomach is so packed solid that you'd really have to commit to it to depress it in any way. My little groans and grunts every time you you, as well as the wet hiccup when you pushed right over my stomach-organ are proof enough that pushing into my tummy is a really, really bad idea right now. Not like that's going to stop you.

I slap at your hands, glaring at you.

"N-Not in public…nngh…p-please?" My eyes glisten with tears at the thought of being forced to puke in public. The bus stop has a trash bin, but we're in a commercial area. If the stop were in a more secluded area with some trees or shrubs around for cover…maybe…b-but we're in a commercial area and there are people and cars with people in them all around us.

[alj4890]

Day 1: Distraction

(Thomas Hunt x OC) in a Choices Red Carpet Diaries/ The Royal Heir crossover fic.

Masterlist

Rating: PG for some mentions of sexual situations. Mostly fluff all over.

@krsnlove @my-heart-beats-for-ya ​ @aworldoffandoms ​​ @flyawayboo ​​ @trappedinfanfiction ​​  @sophxwithers @twinkleallnight @hopelessromantic1352 @tessa-liam @choicesrcd2022 @promptnonny

Premiere Date

Two months earlier...

"Maxwell said the premiere for The Royal Romance will be December first." Amanda balanced her phone on her shoulder while finishing up reviewing the servants' wages. "Would you like to be my date for it?"

"Of course." Thomas jotted it down on his calendar. "I believe we made it official last month that I would be your date from now on."

Amanda couldn't help but smile when she looked at her engagement ring. "Yes, we did but I thought since it is a Tommy Phelps film, that might stretch your affection for me.

Thomas snorted in response. "There are not enough explosives in that man's mixed bag of mediocre cinematic tricks to ever stretch what I feel for you."

"I love how you're able to take an insult to someone else and turn it into something romantic for me." She replied with a giggle.

His lips curved. "As was my intention. I should be in the process of editing my film by then." He double checked the date. "Are you able to remain in Los Angeles after the premiere?"

"I believe so." Amanda flipped through her own calendar. "I don't have any court events I have to attend until after the holidays."

"Good." Thomas motioned for Holly to bring him his schedule for the day. "Then we can begin our plans."

Amanda smiled even more. "Our wedding plans?"

"Exactly." He quickly scanned the day's shots. "I don't intend to start any film projects until the end of next year so that we can enjoy the beginning of our marriage."

Thomas glared over at Holly and Addison making aww noises. He turned away from them in an attempt to keep his conversation private.

"Plus I want us to have a honeymoon away from everyone we know."

His frown eased when he heard Amanda laughing.

"Have you got your usual audience around you again?" She teased.

"I do." He grumbled.

"I see." Amanda smiled softly. "I suppose this means no, I love you, at the end of this call, hmm?

"Of course not." He replied. "I'm not going to let a few irritating individuals stop me from saying that."

"Then I will let you get your day started while I wind down for the evening." She replied. "I love you, Thomas."

"I love you, too." He sent another glare over his shoulder when he heard Addison and Holly's overly dramatic sighs. "Sleep well."

"I'll talk to you tomorrow, my love." Amanda promised.

"I look forward to it." Thomas ended the call with a dark frown towards his two assistants. "Don't you have something you should be working on?"

"Just waiting upon your usual demands, boss." Holly replied.

"Is Amanda coming to visit?" Addison asked.

"Unfortunately," he quickly counted the weeks, "not yet."

"You miss her a lot, don't you?" Holly prodded.

"I do." His frown reappeared at them involving themselves in his private life. "Well, don't just stand there! Make sure everyone is waiting on the set!"

Their grins let him know they weren't the least cowed by his bluster of anger. He knew he'd have to do something about that at some point. A soft smile formed as he realized he wasn't too worried about it.

In eight weeks, he'd be back with the one he loved.

*************

Seven weeks later, Taos, New Mexico...

This had to be one of the inner circles of hell Thomas was trapped in. There was no other explanation that could make sense better than that one. All his plans, his intentions, everything was one monstrous nightmare.

Nothing about filming his new take on the western genre was going like he'd envisioned.

He'd lost numerous supporting actors due to some type of food poisoning. Two of his stunt doubles were in the hospital due to accidents off set. The hotel they were originally at caught on fire and most of the costumes were damaged from the smoke and embers.

Holly fell while hiking and twisted her ankle all while dragging Addison with her and causing the costume designer to break her wrist and three fingers.

Matt Rodriguez had to leave for a few weeks, halting production since his character was the one the entire plot revolved around, when his father suffered a heart attack.

Jessica Clarke, Hollywood's favorite new actress since her starring role in Thomas's The Last Duchess, had to stop filming her own horseback riding scenes the moment she found out she was pregnant.

Thomas was certain that all of this was occurring at just the right moment to drive him completely insane.

There was no way he'd be able to up and leave to start over. They were halfway done with filming the needed scenes on location. Plus, the backdrop to this desert town was exactly what he needed to convey the sheer hopelessness of Matt's character finding peace and redemption.

He eyed his phone, knowing he'd have to make the dreaded phone call.

He wouldn't be able to be Amanda's date for the premiere.

He needed to stay and combat these problems.

He knew she would understand. It was one of the many things he adored about her. He simply hated the thought of letting her down. And to be honest, he wasn't looking forward to seeing her in pictures on the arm of anyone else.

Who else was more perfect to be her escort to a movie premiere than the one man many regarded as a cinematic genius?

Thomas rubbed his face, softly groaning at what must be done.

He visibly jumped when his phone vibrated loudly on the table with an incoming call.

"Hello?" He tried to not sound so disgusted.

"Oof." Amanda replied. "That might be the most depressing hello I've ever heard."

Thomas pinched the bridge of his nose. He didn't know how to begin letting her down.

"Production must be going rough." Amanda softly said. "I'm so sorry."

"What do you have to apologize for?" Thomas snorted. "Unless you have become some maniacal sorceress and placed a curse upon my film, you have nothing to be sorry about."

He realized how bitter his tone was when he was met with nothing but silence.

"Amanda, I apologize." Thomas began again. "I didn't mean to sound like--"

"I know you didn't." She quickly interrupted before he spiraled on with guilt. "I only meant how sorry I am that I can't do anything to make it better for you."

"You make everything better." He grumbled. "In fact, hearing your voice is the only thing keeping me from yanking my hair out right now."

The sound of her laughter bubbling up brought a softening to his frown.

"We can't have that." She sighed. "I hate I won't get to see you next week."

He blinked. "How did you know I wouldn't be able to take you to the premiere?"

Her chuckle held a touch of sadness.

"Because I know how hard this shoot has been for you and I know you need to be there to complete it."

Thomas shook his head, marveling at how she always knew what he needed before he even said a word.

"I'm going to miss you terribly." She continued. "If Maxwell hadn't made us all promise to stick by his side, I'd find a way to sneak over to Taos."

"I understand." He slumped in his chair. "I was looking forward to finally having a chance to be with you." He rubbed a hand down his face. "I'm sorry I can't be there as your date."

"Then you better make plans for when you are free for the two of us." She replied.

Thomas could imagine the smile she must have just by the sound of her voice.

"What kind of plans would you like me to make?" He asked.

"The usual kind, Mr. Hunt." Amanda replied. "Time where we can be alone without anyone or anything else bothering us. I want no distractions taking your attention away from me."

"My favorite kind of plan." His lips curved. "And you should know that every time I am with you, nothing can take my attention away from you."

"That's all I want to hear." Amanda softly sighed. "I probably should let you go so you can get some rest."

"I doubt I'll get any sleep." He grumbled. "I've got another rewrite to work on with Holly."

"Try for my sake." Amanda gently urged.

He groaned.

"I will for you."

"Good. I love you so much."

Thomas relaxed some in knowing she must truly not be upset with him for canceling their plans by hearing her say that.

"I love you, too."

After he ended the call, he sat there staring at nothing in particular while thinking of Amanda. His frown formed once more in knowing she'd be coming to America and he couldn't enjoy her visit.

He reached over for the script, picked up his pen, then paused.

He wondered if there was a chance she could come here after the premiere.

*************

December first...

"Earth calling Thomas, Come in, Thomas."

He looked up, blinking the world around him back into focus.

"Welcome back." Holly grumbled, handing him a new cup of coffee. "Are we going to change up the scene with the argument Jonah and Marlene have since Jessica can't chase him down during the stampede?"

"Hmm?" Thomas glanced at the script. "Yes, of course."

Holly waited for him to give her something to write down.

Thomas stared at the scene for a few silent seconds.

"Okay." Holly threw her pen down. "Talk to me, boss."

Thomas quirked an eyebrow at her.

"We've been moving at a snail's pace with this script. You've barely shot any new footage. Every time I come into your trailer, you're staring off into the distance." She folded her arms. "There's only two possibilities for you to lose focus."

His eyes narrowed.

"The first one," Holly continued, unfazed by his glare, "is that this desert town has now drained your heart of filmmaking."

He rolled his eyes in response.

"Or you are distracted with a serious issue." She concluded.

He averted his eyes from her.

"What's wrong?" Holly repeated. "Come on, Thomas. I've worked with you too many times to be ignored."

He cleared his throat. "I don't know. Each time I think about the scenes that need to be addressed, I find myself..."

He squirmed in his chair, glaring down at his cup of coffee.

"You find yourself, what?" Holly prompted.

"I find myself thinking of Amanda."

Holly sat back with her jaw dropped.

"It isn't that shocking." He grumbled. "She is my fiancée after all."

"I know that." Holly leaned forward. "But I've never known you to be so lost in thought over her that you weren't able to work!"

"I am working!" He snapped.

Thomas snatched his pen up and x'ed out the entire scene. "There!" He threw it down. "I just made a directorial decision!"

"Thomas!" She scolded.

He rubbed a hand down his face.

"Why don't you take the next couple of days off and go see her?" Holly asked.

"Because I have a job to do, here." He argued.

"Which you're sucking at." Holly mumbled

"That was unnecessary." Thomas bit out.

"No. It's pretty necessary." She took the script and set it back in her portfolio. "Take a break. Everyone else has needed one for various reasons. You need one to clear your head so we can finish this shoot strong."

Thomas groaned, shaking his head.

"You know I'm right. Go surprise Amanda. It will put you in a better mood." Holly swiped up her stuff on her way out. "And we certainly need a more pleasant director right now."

"I won't make it in time to take her to the premiere." He mumbled.

Holly paused at the door. "Then get there in time to take her home."

His eyebrows raised while he calculated the hours he'd need to do just that.

*************

"What'd you think?" Maxwell eagerly asked.

"It was amazing!" Riley exclaimed.

"I never said any of that." Drake snapped. "Why did you--"

"I loved it!" Hana interrupted before Drake could destroy Maxwell's excitement. "I wish I was as graceful as Cassandra Leigh."

"You are even more graceful." Liam told her while slipping his arm around Riley. His smile grew when his wife kissed his cheek. "And I am moved seeing our love story come to life."

Olivia rolled her eyes. "At least you made me true to form." She eyed Amanda. "You're awfully quiet."

"Hmm?" She looked up at her friends. "I'm sorry, did you ask me something?"

"The movie?" Maxwell took her by the shoulders to playful shake her. "Remember seeing it just a few minutes ago?"

Amanda laughed. "Yes. It was great."

"It's a shame you were out of the country during all that." Maxwell slung his arm around her shoulders as they followed everyone out to the lobby. "Then you could have been cast as someone awesome."

"I doubt anyone is more awesome than Ryan Summers." She teased. "You lucked out."

"I know!" Maxwell grinned at her. "Wasn't it like looking at my twin brother?"

"Sure."

Once they were out in the lobby, the group looked around at the crowd.

"Now what?" Drake asked.

"After party, baby!" Tommy Phelps joined them. "We are going to celebrate our success!"

"I've been waiting all my life for an after party." Maxwell exclaimed.

"My man!" Tommy fist bumped him. "I knew you would be down for one." He eyed the other Cordonians. "You're all coming too, right?"

"We are." Riley replied. "Right guys?"

Liam, Drake, and Hana answered in the affirmative.

Olivia rolled her eyes with the pleading looks from Maxwell and Riley.

"I suppose I could go for a drink or two." She responded. "Amanda?"

She nudged her when the duchess remained quiet.

"Hmm?" Amanda tried to focus on the conversation. "Oh! No. I'm not going."

"No!" Maxwell pouted. "How come?"

"Jet lag." Amanda latched on to the excuse. "I think I'll go back to the hotel and get some sleep."

After another firmer refusal, she was able to escape her friends.

All she wanted to do was to go back to her room and call Thomas. It felt so wrong being in Los Angeles without him. Her first premiere had been as his date for The Last Duchess. She'd assumed as quickly as their relationship developed that all premieres would be spent by his side.

She could just imagine his reactions to the overly dramatic scenes, the unneeded explosions, and the way the scenes were framed. Her lips curved into a sad smile as she also thought of how he would have remained by her side, his arm around her or holding her hand, whispering that he thought she looked lovely tonight.

She could almost feel the kisses he would have placed upon her knuckles and temple as they sat through the film. Her skin tingled with how he would have insisted they not go to the after party so that they could return to his home for an evening alone.

Her imagination was vivid enough to conjure all they would have gotten up to once within that peaceful, empty of all well meaning friends, and able to express their love. The kisses and caresses that would follow once the door was shut. The clothes slipping off.

Her cheeks colored as she walked outside of the theater. Her eyes scanned the now empty red carpet, searching further for a taxi or town car to take her back to her hotel. The number of limos lined up made her softly groan over the possibility of having to walk a few blocks in her uncomfortable heels.

As she dismissed each limo and waiting driver without a second glance, she doubled back on the sight of a tuxedo clad man leaning causally against a limo.

Thomas watched as recognition flashed in her expression. Unfolding his arms, he broke out into a smile as she rushed to greet him.

Chuckling, he caught her in a hug that lifted her off the ground. His lips sought hers as she slipped her arms around his neck.

"You came." She breathed against his lips.

"I did." He deepened the kiss, feeling at peace for the first time in weeks. "I've missed you."

"Nowhere near as much as I've missed you." She leaned back to look into his handsome face. "I can't believe you're here!"

He took her hands while motioning with his head toward the limo. "Shall we go home?" He eyed the people beginning to spill out. "Unless you have other plans."

Keeping his hand in hers, she got into the limo, tugging him in behind her.

"My plans only involved returning to the hotel and calling you." She snuggled against him once he settled his arm around her. "Now that you're here, I'm rethinking them."

"Oh?" He pressed his lips to the side of her neck. "I hope they align with my own."

She melted against him as his hands began to wander along her curves. Their lips met again and again in a more heated exchange than the last one.

"I feel very confident that our plans are going to align perfectly."

[serendipitouswasteland]

Sweater Weather

ship: buddie pov: third person written: April 10 - 12, 2023 first published: April 12, 2023 word count: 2,569 - summary: Buck wears a sweater almost too often. Eddie notices. - A/N: Pretty much, I have become obsessed with the sweater Buck is wearing at the end of 6x13 and have decided that it's his favorite sweater and he washes it as often as he can so he can wear it as often as he can because it's a comfort for him, because I have a sweater that I do that with so therefore...you get it. Enjoy. <3

Buck has a list. A checklist. After getting struck by lightning– after his coma dream– he felt like he needed to make sure he was still there– still alive. So, every morning when he wakes up the first thing he does is grab his phone and text Bobby. He doesn’t leave his messages until he receives a response. Then, if he has work, he waits until he gets there to ask Eddie and Chim about Christopher, Maddie, and Jee-Yun, respectively. On his off days, however, Buck’s mind scrambles for a bit. Texting Bobby every morning is fine. He texts him all the time anyways just to update him on his life, so him now asking for Bobby to do the same wasn’t too much different. Calling Maddie and Chimney and Eddie, though, is hard to do without someone becoming suspicious. This morning, Buck is lucky.

As Buck blinks open his eyes and stretches in his bed, a small smile appears on his face knowing that some of his checklist he doesn’t have to do. He crawls out of bed, sliding his feet into a pair of slippers as he yawns and stretches some more. He gets up from his bed, grabbing his phone and sending a text to Bobby as he trudges down the stairs. Buck puts his phone into the pocker of his sweats once he reaches the bottom step, looking over to his kitchen where Christopher is sitting at the table with a bowl of cereal already half eaten. Buck smiles, taking a seat next to him and making his own bowl.

“Goodmorning,” Buck says, his voice filled with slip.

“Goodmorning,” Chris says back, taking a bite of his food.

“How long have you been up?”

“Not very long.”

“That’s good,” Buck hums, nodding as he takes his first bite of his own cereal.

“Buck,” Christopher prods, and Buck hums while turning to face him, “isn’t that the same sweater you wore yesterday?”

“Uh…” Buck looks down at his chest, and, yes, it is the same sweater, but—

“How come you didn’t have to change but I did?” Chris asks, and Buck lets out a short laugh.

“Well, buddy, I did change. I changed my pants.”

“But you didn’t change your sweater.

“Yes, I didn’t change my sweater,” Buck says, sighing as he takes another bite. “You are right about that. Now, your dad will be here soon to pick you and your cookies up, so why don’t you go ahead and get ready, alright?”

“Yes, Buck,” Chris sighs, leaving the table and going to where his second bag is in the living room before going to the bathroom with his clothes after.

Buck gets up from the table shortly after, cleaning up both of their bowls then starting the coffee maker. There’s a knock at his door right as he gets it going, so he quickly shouts that he’ll be right there before finishing up. Buck skids over to the door, opening it up instantly to find Eddie standing on the other side, and Buck lets out a breathless smile, and—

(Look, it’s not like Eddie was keeping track. Well, he was, but it was easier to pretend that he wasn’t. So, no, Eddie wasn’t keeping track. He’s not. He just, maybe, kind of, sort of, is. It’s Buck’s fault. Or, if you were to ask Eddie, those would likely be the words out of his mouth and, well, he’s not wrong, but it also wasn’t Eddie’s job to notice…or is it? Buck is the one who came over to Eddie’s house when he wanted to escape his own loft. Buck is the one who went to Eddie as a place of comfort where he knew he would be looked after. So, maybe it is Eddie’s job—)

Eddie is staring at Buck. It’s been seventeen hours since he’d dropped Christopher off with him, and now Buck is wearing the same sweater as when he’d dropped Chris off the evening before. Eddie tilts his head at Buck as the door is opened for him further, stepping inside. He glances back at Buck who has his brows furrowed as his hands fall to rest on his hips. Eddie looks away, letting out a sigh as he steps towards the kitchen, hearing a door open a moment later and turning around to find Christopher dressed and ready coming out of the bathroom.

“Dad!” Christopher shouts, giving his dad a hug.

Buck shuts the door, going to the living room and grabbing both of Christopher’s bags, handing his school bag to Eddie before going to the bathroom. He picks up Chris’s pajamas and stuffs them in the bag before going back to the kitchen, handing that to Eddie, too. Buck then grabs the container of cookies sitting on his kitchen counter, handing them to Chris.

“Alright. Are you ready to go?” Eddie asks, Buck standing against the fridge.

“Ready!” Chris says, giving Buck a hug. “Will you come over later?”

“Of course, bud. I’ll see you later,” Buck says as Chris and Eddie begin to make their way toward the door.

“I love you, Buck! I’ll see you soon!” Chris shouts from the doorway, waving.

“Love you too, kid!” Buck calls after him and returns his wave, giving a big smile.

Buck glances at Eddie who’s staring right back at him, the same grin on his face that Buck has. Eddie gives Buck a nod, and then the door to Buck’s loft shuts and he’s left standing alone in his kitchen. The coffee maker goes off, so he goes and grabs a mug out of the cabinet before filling it. In truth, he’s exhausted. He’s always exhausted now. He’s been sleeping more on shift, but he’s pushing through. Eddie checks on him sometimes, but for the most part he leaves him alone unless necessary. Bobby does the same. If anyone is hovering, it’s Hen and Chim– something Buck will have to call Maddie about later.

After finishing his coffee, Buck goes upstairs to change before deciding to shower. He grabs a pair of jeans and goes to his bathroom, thoroughly ridding himself of any germs garnered from the day before. He spends a considerable amount of time on his hair, lately having taken a liking to his natural curl pattern and wanting to take care of it properly. Once finished, he slips into the jeans then pulls on his sweater, only he doesn’t think anything of it. It’s his sweater. His favorite sweater. A new sweater, sure, but still his favorite.

Buck moseys around his loft for a while, cleaning up random things that he finds. For the first time all week, he makes his bed, smiling at the neatly made comforter and sheets. Then he bounds downstairs, falling onto his couch as he turns on the TV to watch the Dodgers versus Giants game. After a while, though, his eyes start to flutter, and he yawns. He turns the TV down low, hoping that will allow him to fall asleep, but then his body focuses on the feeling of the couch beneath him instead of the game and it’s far from comfortable. Buck groans, rolling off the couch and dragging himself upstairs, falling flat onto his bed. He’s out within seconds.

It’s not until several hours later that Buck wakes up, his loft having become dim with the only light being emitted from his TV downstairs. Buck rubs his eyes, climbing out of bed and going downstairs, sighing once he’s realized he missed the rest of the game. He picks up his phone off the coffee table to check the score when he finds a message and two missed calls from Eddie, along with one voicemail. Buck furrows his brows, the voicemail being the first thing he checks.

“Hey, so I just got Chris from school and we’re on our way home. I figured I’d let you know so you could start making your way over, but…anyway, I’ll see you in a bit. Bye.”

It’s short, sweet, and to the point and– and it fills Buck’s heart. He smiles, pulling the phone away from his ear when a sudden rush of guilt hits him. It’s dark out, which means that he’s late and Chris is likely in bed already. Cursing at himself, Buck quickly slips on a pair of shoes, rushing out of his apartment. He gets in the car and dials Eddie’s phone immediately, but he doesn’t receive an answer. Halfway through his drive over, his phone starts ringing, and he tries grabbing it to answer but it falls to the floor. Buck hits his fist on the wheel, tapping nervously the rest of his way over.

The second Buck gets to Eddie’s house he doesn’t waste a second in getting out of his Jeep and jogging to the front door. He twists the knob and the door opens with ease, and Buck lets out a deep sigh. Eddie pops his head out from the hall, smiling when he sees who it is.

“Hey,” Eddie says, grinning and nodding to the kitchen. “Are you hungry?”

“Uh, no,” Buck says, shaking his head and sitting on the couch. “I take it you just made sure Chris is in bed?”

“Yup,” Eddie says, falling to sit next to Buck. “Sorry I missed your call. I tried calling you back, but you didn’t answer.”

“I was in the car. My phone fell, and I figured the risk of an accident wasn’t worth it.”

“That’s fair,” Eddie says, grabbing a beer off the coffee table and taking a swig. “Do you want one?”

“No, I’m good. I’m sorry for not coming over sooner.”

“It’s fine. After the second call, I figured you were asleep. I take it I was right?”

“I was watching the Dodgers game.”

“You turned your phone off for baseball?”

“What? No, I– I was watching the Dodgers game and I started falling asleep. I went upstairs, fell on my bed, and it was lights out instantly.”

“So I was right.”

“How’d you guess that in the first place?” Buck asks with a tilt of his head.

“You’re still wearing the same sweater as before,” Eddie says, pointing at Buck, and Buck, of course, looks down, sighing when he finds Eddie is right.

“Right,” Buck says, holding his hand out and a second later Eddie’s beer is in his hand.

“So, what’s going on?” Eddie asks, eyes never leaving Buck. He has a soft look on his face, and if this wasn’t such a serious conversation Buck just might smile in return.

“Nothing,” Buck says with a shrug, and Eddie’s eyes narrow on him. “The sweater is comforting for me.”

“Can you explain that?” Eddie asks, and it’s not mean or cruel, but effortlessly kind. It’s easy to see where Chris gets it from.

“Uh, well, it feels– it’s like a hug. Like one big, giant hug, constantly, and if I need a tighter hug I can just tug on it and I’ll feel better. It’s nice. It makes me feel safe.”

“Mmm,” Eddie hums, eyes finally trailing away from Buck and to his TV instead.

“What?” Buck asks, leaning over just a bit, and he can see a smile pull at the corner of Eddie’s mouth.

“Just thinking,” Eddie responds, smile growing more.

“About?” Buck asks, and now the front of Buck’s shoulder is pressing into the side of Eddie’s, the two impossibly close.

“How to make you feel safe no matter what you’re wearing,” Eddie admits as he finally looks at Buck again, and Buck can tell that it’s honest and true.

“Just being here helps,” Buck says, giving Eddie the sweetest smile he can muster.

“You know,” Eddie says, pulling at Buck’s sweater, “it doesn’t look bad on you. In fact, I think you should wear sweaters more often.”

“You think so?” Buck asks, and oh, are their faces close.

“Dad?” They hear from the hall, slowly breaking apart.

“Yeah, bud?” Eddie asks, getting up from the couch.

“You forgot my glass of water,” Chris says, and Buck smiles at the comfort it brings him.

“Want me to get it?” Buck asks, and Eddie turns to look at him, about to protest when Chris lights up with joy.

“Buck!”

“Buck—” Eddie cuts himself off, running a hand over his face.

“Sorry,” Buck says, giving Christopher a hug. “I’m getting you your water and then it’s off to bed, alright? Dad and I were having a very important conversation.”

“Yes, sir!” Chris says with a big grin, and Buck smiles and laughs, going right to the kitchen. He grabs a cup with a straw and a lid and fills it up with ice water, bringing it back to Chris in under a minute.

“There. I’m sorry I didn’t get here sooner, but I’ll see you in the morning, alright?”

“Goodnight, Buck,” Chris yawns, giving Buck another hug before going back down the hall.

“Goodnight, Christopher,” Buck whispers once he’s already halfway down the hall, lingering in the doorway a moment before falling back onto the couch, his head falling into Eddie’s lap.

Both of Eddie’s hands immediately come to comb through Buck’s hair, detangling any mess that there is. Yeah, Buck thinks, I feel safe here. It’s not a question at all, but a mere fact. Being at Eddie’s house, on Eddie’s couch, in Eddie’s arms– all of it feels safe. He feels like nothing can hurt him as long as he’s confined within the walls of Eddie’s home, and that’s something that he could really use as of late.

“So,” Eddie starts, one of his hands trailing away from Buck’s hair, resting on his chest instead, “you’re planning on staying the night?”

“If that’s alright,” Buck responds, his own hand coming to hold Eddie’s in its place.

That was new. Since getting struck by lightning– since dying– Eddie has constantly reached out for Buck, keeping him close, and when they’re alone placing his hand on his heart just to make sure that it’s still there and still beating. It’s when Eddie’s hand trails away, though, that things are weird, because it’s never the same. Tonight is no different, Eddie looking at Buck as he moves his hand away from Buck’s chest and rather to caress his cheek.

“You’re still here,” Eddie whispers, his voice barely audible.

“I’m still here,” Buck assures, hand still wrapped around Eddie’s. “We’re still here.”

“Yeah,” Eddie says, properly interlocking his and Buck’s hands, “we are.”

“You should get to bed,” Buck says, sitting up, but Eddie only pulls him closer, Buck’s back falling flush against Eddie’s chest.

“So should you,” Eddie says, wrapping his arms around Buck’s middle.

“Eddie…” Buck sighs, turning his head away, as if that would change their current positions.

“You said that just being here is a comfort,” Eddie whispers into Buck’s ear, clocking the reaction Buck has, “so why not see if I can comfort you more?”

“How?” Buck asks, and he already knows the answer, but– god, Eddie doesn’t know what he’s doing.

“Just let me hold you. You were tense until my fingers landed in your hair before, so I have to assume that means that me touching you helps, right? So let me hold you,” Eddie pleas, and Buck melts against him immediately, rolling around in his place to hug Eddie’s torso.

“Thank you,” Buck whispers, and Eddie doesn’t give a verbal response, simply holding Buck tighter. I love you so much.

[katebishopofearth]

I posted 8,106 times in 2022

260 posts created (3%)

7,846 posts reblogged (97%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@gaylittlepirates

@ursamajor17

@shakespeareanqueer

@peanutbutter-nutella

@super-weenie-hut-juniors

I tagged 4,762 of my posts in 2022

Only 41% of my posts had no tags

#ofmd - 1,447 posts

#edward teach - 613 posts

#marvel - 579 posts

#stede bonnet - 529 posts

#blackbonnet - 477 posts

#animals - 469 posts

#queue wear fine things well - 292 posts

#cats - 224 posts

#fire cannot queue a dragon - 192 posts

#natasha romanoff - 169 posts

Longest Tag: 134 characters

#ed and stede dont know what they mean to each other until its too late and they both get the wrong idea cuz they never told each other

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

“you can’t keep doing this. you can’t keep lying to yourself.” ironwidow! bonus points if it’s post cacw angst haha

Hey Liv <3 of course you would pick this one lolol, you know that post cacw is your area of expertise not mine, so here's my take on it. Hope it hits you in the feels.

more sacred romantic moments prompts here

--------

skirting a lie, dancing on the verge of a truth

Tony rubbed his eyes. This conversation was going in circles, and he wasn’t getting any younger. In fact, he felt like he’d aged half a decade since picking up the phone.

“Look, Secretary,” he said with a heavy sigh. “You can keep looking all you’d like, but you’re not gonna find her. Once Romanoff is gone, she’s gone.”

“If she does make contact.” Ross sounded aggravated. “You’ll get in touch straight away?”

“There’s no point in asking me that.” Tony tried to swallow his resentment. “I’m the last person she wants to see.”

“But if she does turn up,” Ross pushed.

Tony’s patience was worn down by the headache that throbbed in his temples. “Doesn’t the Secretary of State have better things to do than chasing down one rogue spy halfway across the world?”

“She’s an international fugitive!” Ross interjected, but Tony ignored him.

“That can’t be good for your heart.” Tony didn’t have the self restraint to stop himself from being snide. “Especially so soon after your triple bypass. Shouldn’t you be lying down or something? In fact I’m calling it – you take care now Secretary.” He didn’t wait for Ross to reply before he ended the call.

He heaved another sigh and got up from his seat. That phone call took years off his life. Talking with Ross was bad for his health. He needed coffee. Or alcohol.

He ambled through the now-empty corridors of the compound. Not too long ago they were filled with the sounds of his teammates, but now, an accusation was all that echoed in their silence. At the sight of the kitchen door, he was assaulted by the memory of that first conversation about the Accords. The moment it all went downhill.

He pushed open the door and was assaulted by a gun pushed in his face.

“Woah!” He sprang back from the young blonde woman who gripped it. Behind her – Natasha. Sitting at the table. In the adrenaline rush he forgot that he was mad at her.

“Who are you?” He demanded his assailant. To Natasha: “What are you doing here? What the hell is going on?”

“Yelena, put the gun down,” Natasha said in an impassive tone.

In a fluid motion the attacker lifted her hands in a “surrender” pose and flipped the gun to point straight up, her finger away from the trigger. Though Tony didn’t doubt she could find it with magnetic precision in a heartbeat.

She spoke with a Russian accent, but the indifferent way with which she spoke reminded him of Natasha. “I’m the sister, you’re the boyfriend.”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Natasha protested.

“I’m not her boyfriend,” Tony agreed. A pang of – something – prodded him uncomfortably.

“Sure he’s not.” Yelena shot Natasha a cheeky grin before she holstered the gun at her hip.

Tony sat down at the table at an angle from Natasha and repeated, “So what are you doing here?” He meant to sound angrier, but he couldn’t the note of relief creeping into his voice. He had missed her, more than he anticipated. Something flickered behind Natasha’s eyes before they shuttered into a neutral expression. He almost believed that she missed him, too.

[continue reading on AO3]

33 notes - Posted March 6, 2022

#4

Wave-tossed [a blackbonnet fanfic]

Fandom: Our Flag Means Death Pairing: Blackbonnet Characters: Stede | Ed Rating: G Other tags: nightmare | hurt/comfort | ed has abandonment issues

Wave-tossed

Ed woke in a cold sweat.

With each hammer of his heart the walls of the cabin squeezed in. Darkness pressed down on him like the depths of the ocean and he didn’t know which way was up, couldn’t break the surface, fought against instinct and gripping terror. Rough waves rocked the ship, a first taste of the winter storms that were to come, and the creak of the wood was a familiar echo to the ache of his heart, the only answer he’d ever had in lonely nights.

Fighting to open his mouth and throat and lungs against the watery darkness, he took a gasping breath. It grounded him – just long enough to register the soft, snoring body that lay against his. With a shudder Ed threw himself into Stede’s chest, clutching at him like a drowning man to a raft. Not caring that he would wake the man, only needing him – his touch, his scent, his arms around him –

“Ed?” Came the sleep-blurry voice. “What’s wrong, love?”

Hands on his back, holding him with hesitation. With a gentleness that shattered the last bit of his resolve. He sobbed brokenly into Stede’s shoulder, hot tears wetting the frills on the nightshirt. He didn’t care an ounce for his dignity, not in the suffocating darkness, not in the dead of the night, not between the wooden walls that haunted him with the destructive grief they had witnessed.

“Don’t ever leave me.”

A sharp inhale. “Oh, my darling.” Stede sighed, and Ed lifted his tearstained face to look at him. His features were illuminated by the faintest glow of a crescent moon on tossing waves, and wore a look of deep sadness and remorse and heartbreak, a faint mirror of the pain that ached in Ed’s bones. A warm palm cupped his face, keeping him from burying his face in his chest again. Keeping his eyes on his own. “I swear I won’t leave you ever again."

The words rang true, but they were battered to shreds by the turbulent fears that crashed through Ed’s veins. The phantoms that haunted his dreams seemed more real than the man who held him in his arms. He choked out, “I can’t – if you left me, I can’t – I don’t know how –”

“Hush.” Stede drew Ed even closer, fingers brushing through greying locks, a steady hand on the small of his back. Ed curled up into the safe cocoon of Stede’s body, breathing him in, faint florals and patchouli. The heady scent swam in his head, banishing the inky tendrils back into their shadowy corners. “Not even Mephistopheles and all the demons of hell could drag me away from you.”

Ed needed more of Stede. He splayed his hand against his ribs, feeling under his palm the solid torso that rose and fell in a steady rhythm. Stede took the cue, or maybe he just understood what he needed at the moment, because he said, “Count with me, darling.”

[continue on AO3]

34 notes - Posted April 24, 2022

#3

Me:

No one:

Absolutely not a single soul:

My head: izzy why don’t we have a birb guy

37 notes - Posted April 7, 2022

#2

LISTEN back in season 3 when robin was all “pffffft nancy wheeler little miss perfect” I know that’s not an exact quote but it’s late and I’m jetlagged I SAID she would end up liking nancy didn’t I like I jokingly said I ship them and I WAS RIGHT

43 notes - Posted June 13, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i really need to get off tumblr and edit this fucking story

160 notes - Posted May 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[outercrasis]

The Monster You Know

Pairing: Monster!Max Phillips x F!Reader

Word Count/Rating: 6.3k / EXPLICIT (18+ only, bye minors)

Warnings: Monsterfucking, some angst, oral (m!receiving), unprotected sex (wrap it up pls), cockwarming, some body worship, size kink and lil bit of praise kink

Summary: There's a surprise visit at your office. It doesn't go how you might think.

A/N: I said take monsterfucking and make it soft and emotional. Unbeta'd. Additional notes at the end. Again if you're tagged and this isn't your thing, no hard feelings in the slightest.

Direct Sequel to Low Tier Monsterf*ck + Series Masterlist

You’ve been ignoring the messages on your inter-office chat all morning. There was a kind fifteen minute reprieve before the first one chimed. You'd barely figured out just how deep of a hole you'd need to dig yourself out of with work.

Sami: The prodigal daughter has returned!!

Linsey: With details?

Curtis: 👀👀👀

They’ve been at it since then, a variety of messages and gifs all designed to poke and prod you into spilling info beyond the “I’m alive” text you sent to your group chat the past two mornings as you called out sick from work. As though you would type out the filthy details of your past 48 hours on a work computer. Did they not take the same sexual harassment course as you?

Beyond not wanting to get flagged by HR, you’re also left puzzling another very important question. It hadn’t come up between rounds of getting your back blown out (seriously, there’s a slight twinge in your lower back now) and you’re left wondering if telling other people that Max is literally a monster is something you’re even allowed to do.

Max doesn’t seem to have too many qualms, considering you’re a nearly random woman he revealed that fact to, but since the existence of honest-to-god monsters isn’t the headline of every major news source maybe it is a secret for you to keep. Either way, you’re not entirely sure how to discuss the life-altering sex you’ve been having without bringing it up. The horns and wings, and not to mention his tongue, were half of the fun.

You want to text Max and ask, but it seems like a strange thing to message out of the blue rather than having a one-on-one chat about it. Plus, if the government is tapped into your phone, it might be best to not discuss those details where someone could easily read it. No need to have Max getting kidnapped and tested on weighing heavy on your conscience.

When lunch finally rolls around they’re practically ravenous. Curtis hardly waits for the elevator to close before he asks, “So is he packing? He has to be packing, right?”

There’s a beat of silence before you all erupt into laughter. You pat Curtis on the arm and tell him, “Yeah, man. He’s big.”

“Maax,” you playfully whine. “You have to let me go.”

He has you caged in next to the doorway – his wings creating a little bubble for you both to stand in. It had been a struggle to make it this far. Max has tried every dirty tactic and now he’s busy assaulting the spot he already knows you like on your neck. Perceptive bastard.

He barely raises his lips off of you to reply. “I don’t think I have to do anything, lamb.”

You try to ignore the way he’s shifting his thigh into position between your legs. “Well if you don’t want me to be fired and then homeless, you do. Don’t you have a job you should be at too?”

You hope that turning the tables on him will help. Maybe the reminder of some of his own responsibility will be enough for him to let you go. It fails spectacularly.

“Yes,” Max replies, his large hand sliding under your shirt. “I’ve been working while you sleep.”

He doesn’t sleep. Or at least not much. You had guessed at that with Max being awake every time you reopened your eyes, but you hadn’t actually asked. There wasn’t much of a chance to discuss it anyway between the numerous sexual acts you’d taken part in, as well as the necessities of sleeping and eating. Thinking got a lot harder while your stomach growled during your fifth orgasm of the day.

“Do you work remote?” you ask. Your breath hitches when Max presses his firm thigh just a little harder into you, but you try to act otherwise unaffected. It’s a ridiculous game to be playing with him, but you need to make it out the door. Getting fired or even reprimanded by your boss is not on your preferred agenda for the day.

Max, to his credit, goes right along with your game. Of course he has the fun part while you’re forced to try and act like this isn’t exactly what you want. Not fair in the slightest. You’re already plotting ways to get him back for this. “Not all the time. Doesn’t matter when you’re the boss.”

You don’t have a good comeback for that. “Right, well. Not all of us are bosses and mine isn’t going to believe I’m still sick without going to a doctor. So unless you’re also one of those, you need to let me go.”

Max’s hand that had been slowly inching under your waistband stops. You wish that he could keep going, that you could spend another day wrapped in his big arms and wings, but it’s just not realistic. You’ve already pushed it and you really would like to keep your job. It’s not the greatest, but you have friends who work there and it pays well enough. Even grade A monster dick isn’t worth losing that. Barely.

He’s pouting when he pulls away from you. If it weren’t obvious from the look on his face, he’s even letting his wings droop, like a dog lowering its tail between its legs. One final ploy to get you to stay that very nearly works. If only you didn’t need money to live. Fucking capitalism.

“Sorry, Max. I have to go.”

You move towards the door, watching as Max transforms back into his human appearance. It’s jarring, only having seen glimpses of it over the past few days. You reach out, carding your fingers through his hair where his horns normally cover.

You open the door and leave with a wink. “Bye, handsome.”

You don’t tell them about him being a monster. Not explicitly anyway. When you first sat down at your favorite lunch place you’d had more than half a mind to, but you just couldn’t when it came down to it. Not before talking with Max. It didn’t feel right to divulge his secret, no matter how much you trusted the three people sitting with you.

You find workarounds, little hints to his true nature but nothing overtly saying, yes, he turned into a big monster man and then he fucked me silly for two days straight. The looks on their faces might have been worth that though. Oh well, you can still surprise them with that later.

“No way is that guy stronger than me,” Curtis challenges. You’d just finished telling them how long Max had held you up against the wall for and he’d called bullshit. Said there was no possible way a man could hold any woman up for that long, much less with his dick buried in her. Okay, he’d been less crass about it, but that was the gist.

You shrug. It’s not like you can say it is possible because Max isn’t just a man. “I don’t know what to tell you man, there is a reason I called out for two days,” you answer around a bite of your sandwich. That reason is currently classified, but the wall-fuck certainly factored in.

Linsey pats Curtis’ arm and you feel significantly better about the hit to your friend’s ego. If you know anything about Linsey, she’ll have him feeling like a big, tough man again in no time. Really, Curtis should be thanking you for the no-doubt wonderful evening you’ve just bestowed upon him.

You’re actively avoiding Sami’s narrowed eyes. You know he can tell there’s something more going on, but you’ve already decided against telling them just yet, and if he asks the right question you know you’ll spill.

Maybe Sami is a supernatural creature too with the way he seems to read your mind. The thought pops into your head and you just as soon dismiss it. It’s ridiculous. Just because you met one bona-fide vampire doesn’t mean everyone else around you is some sort of creature too. That’s just absurd.

“Are you going to see him again?” Linsey asks.

“God, I fucking hope so.”

God, it seems, has a funny sense of humor. You’ve spent the last hour and a half since lunch debating on whether or not you should text Max and see if he’s available this weekend when you hear his voice echoing through the office.

At first you think you’re going insane. That somehow your pussy has taken over full operation of your brain and is now making you hallucinate at work. You’re not sure if that’s something that can actually happen, but at this point you’re not willing to rule much of anything out.

You know you’re not going insane when his voice becomes louder, paired with the telling click of your boss’s stilettos and her shrill pitch.

“Oh Max, we are just so thrilled to have you here. I hope you like what you see," Rebecca chirps. You peek up from your desk just in time to see her place a hand on Max’s bicep and squeeze. To think you’d been ready to shame yourself for interpreting her turn of phrase incorrectly when it had very obviously been the way she meant it.

You’re not stupid. You don’t know what you and Max are and a couple days worth of sex does not a relationship make, but your blood boils watching his hand fall over hers, his eyes raking up her body before replying, “So far I’ve loved every inch. I can’t wait to see more, sugar.”

It’s appalling. In more ways than one. You’re not even sure which you’d like to address first – the clear lack of professional behavior, the gross smiles painted on both of their faces, or the fact that he’d been buried in you within the past twelve hours – but all of them have you seeing red.

You can feel Sami’s eyes on you. He’s already figured out what’s going on and is watching to see if his intervention will become required. You’re honestly not sure at this point.

Rebecca’s high pitched giggle is what sets you off. It’s grating to hear and if Max can honestly stand to listen to it that’s his prerogative, but that doesn’t mean the rest of you should be subjected to it. Sami stands up with you, clearly under the impression you’re about to do something stupid. It’s a fair assumption. You’ve been known to do a decent amount of dumb shit.

The moment you clear the cubicle wall, no longer just peeking over top of it, Max’s eyes find yours. He stops in his tracks and you imagine you must look akin to a raging bull – only you’re not the one with the horns in this scenario.

He looks completely human. Of course he does, he’s in a widely public setting, but for a moment you can see him like you did this morning. Shirtless, that teasing strip of hair leading from his belly button to carelessly thrown on pajama pants, his hair ruffled. A few stray longer pieces gently falling over his horns that you couldn’t help but reach out and reposition. He kept his wings out, letting one gently wrap around you, cradling your body closer to his. His eyes glimmered with the ever-shifting flecks of gold, like a star shower that was happening only in his irises. It was the moment you felt like it could be something more than a days long hook-up.

It takes your boss saying your name to make you snap out of the trance you’re in. “Do you know each other?” Rebecca asks. There’s a look on her face that’s more panicked than you’ve ever seen her. At least you know to keep your anger directed at one person and not the pair. You even feel a little bad now that she’s caught in this situation.

“I guess not,” you answer, walking past her and straight for the bathroom. You’re not sure what you’re going to do in there – you went to the bathroom just twelve minutes ago – but it seems better than remaining at your desk.

Your boss and Max continue their tour, considerably less touchy than before. When they head into her office, Curtis pops over the cubicle wall to look for you. He finds Sami and Linsey staring at him instead.

“Uh, wasn’t that-?”

Sami cuts him off. “Yep.”

Your friends are the best. That could be the alcohol talking, but you’re almost certain it’s true when you’re sober too. The role of designated driver is on a weekly rotation and it should be your turn but after the surprise office visit on Thursday, Linsey offered to take it instead. Since she’s a total angel, she didn’t even make you swap with her, just said she’d double up. You very nearly cried. You might now.

“I mean, does he have no sense of decency? He probably didn’t even wash his sheets before moving to his next conquest, it’s disgusting.” You’ve been at this for a while. It’s another credit to your friends that they have the patience to put up with you, but they get it. Your hurt feelings are well within your right.

“Don’t worry about him anymore,” Sami says. “At least you got some good sex out of him and found out he was a piece of shit early on.”

Sami has a point. Both yours and his last relationships had ended with your boyfriends revealing that they were huge tools. Yours after you discovered his texts to his buddies degrading you and being pissed about the amount of hours you were working when you were financially supporting him, and Sami when he gave his boyfriend a surprise visit only to find him balls deep in another guy. To find out early on could be a blessing. It still hurts though.

It’s nearing the end of the night, most of the Friday crowd already having called it quits. Linsey and Curtis are making doe-eyes at each other that’s making your stomach twist and you know it’s probably nearing time for you to call it too. At least they can have a nice night together. You really hope they spill the beans on their relationship soon – pretending to not know is starting to take years off your life.

Linsey and Curtis leave first. You and Sami assure them both that you’ll grab cabs or ubers and let them leave without commenting on the way Curtis’ hand dips into Linsey’s back pocket.

“Do they think we’re that dumb?” Sami asks you, watching the bar door close.

You snort over what remains of your beer. “I really don’t know, man. I’m happy for them though. Curtis has been into her since she started.”

Sami clasps a dramatic hand over his heart. “Our sweet little himbo, all grown up.”

A momentary silence stretches between the two of you. This is not the first time you’ve both ended up here, some of the last people remaining in the bar. The beauty of having a friend with the same shit luck in relationships and a matching coping mechanism.

“I am sorry. You seemed really excited about him at lunch yesterday,” Sami says.

Ah. So you’ve hit that point in the night. The emotional one instead of the bitch about your problems in the hopes they go away one.

“I was,” you admit. It sucks to say out loud but it’s true. To make it even worse, the whole kink fulfillment wasn’t even the reason why. You liked Max. He made terrible lewd jokes, had a far too cocky attitude for how soft he was, and had actually laughed at you when you requested an ice pack for your poor overworked vagina, but you liked him.

Of course he had to be an asshole.

"If it makes you feel any better, you did manage to make Rebecca look like she was going to shit herself," Sami offers.

You can't help but smile. The look on your typically unshakable boss's face had been a treat. "Who knew that even she respects girl code."

Sami, ever the saint, covers your bar tab. He tells you he expects the same the next time he has boy troubles and you hope for both your wallet and your friend's happiness that day never comes.

You're still fairly tipsy when you climb into your uber, waving bye to Sami as he continues to wait for his. Alone with your thoughts, you're helpless as they drift to Max.

You feel like an idiot for thinking there was something more between you. It was obvious now that Max had used you for his own pleasure and when you decided you actually needed to return to your own life, you became unimportant in his. Probably just another notch in a bedpost that's likely been whittled to a toothpick.

Your driver is unfortunately chatty. Some young college kid doing this job to try and make ends meet and doesn't know when to keep quiet. He probably still has the romantic idea in his head that he might be some soothsayer for a downtrodden rider. Somehow he doesn't know that role is only for old men with grizzled beards or weird hippie women.

"What has you so down?" The kid asks.

You want to roll your eyes, potentially tell him to fuck off. Emotions and alcohol get the best of you.

"Found out a guy I slept with didn't feel the same way," you answer.

"How do you know?"

You expected sympathy, not a question like that. It's a little intrusive, but you like his gumption. "He came into my office and was all over my boss."

"Yikes, dude! That blows." Yeah, certainly not a secret paragon of worldwise advice.

You huff. "Tell me about it."

"Man, if I were you I'd be over there chewing him out. Blowing you off is one thing but to go for your boss? Low blow," he says, making a shockingly slow right turn.

"To be fair he didn't know it was my boss," you pause. "That might be worse."

He lets out a low whistle. "Like I said, I'd be tearing that guy a new one."

You consider it for a moment. Realistically, you and Max owe each other nothing. You had a few days of mind-blowing sex with no set plans to see each other again and that was it. He could move on whenever and however he saw fit. Something still burns in your gut though. An anger you know you’ll carry unless you get some answers. Fuck it.

“Could you actually take me to this address?” you ask, holding out your phone for the kid to read.

“Oh hell yeah, lady! Let’s get you some justice!”

On the list of intelligent decisions you’ve made in your life, listening to a college aged uber driver is not high. It is certainly higher than the time you decided to eat an entire funnel cake and then ride the Twister (you were 22 at the time) and higher than the time you tried to work a twelve hour shift on two hours of sleep while sick and hopped up on flu medicine (look, 22 wasn’t a good age for you) – but still, on your list of smart choices, this is not going to be in the top ten any time soon.

You give your driver a 5-star rating and a high five when you get out of the car before marching up to the apartment building’s door. There’s an immediate roadblock. The buzzer.

You blame adrenaline and the remaining effects of booze for you failing to remember this key hurdle. It’s not like you could just buzz Max to let you up. He probably wouldn’t and it would completely ruin your surprise attack.

“Fuck,” you mutter, weighing your options. Your uber has already taken off and you’ve come this far. You need to see it through.

You press one of his neighbor’s buttons. They don’t respond. You try another. Again no reply. Third times the charm? Nope. You try the first one again. Nothing.

You take a deep breath in, trying to calm yourself before you lose it entirely. This always works in movies, why isn’t this working? You try the first one a third time.

This time, a very annoyed voice comes through the speaker. There is a god! “What do you want?”

“Um hi, yeah I need someone to buzz me in.”

“Why?”

Okay, time to think of a good lie. Something to get you inside. “I need to yell at one of your neighbors.”

No! Stupid! Why would you say that? Now they’ll never let you in!

“4C?” the voice from the speaker asks. It takes you aback and you double check Max's address on your phone. 4C.

“Yeah, actually.”

“Go ahead, dude’s a dick. If you kill him though please don’t tell the cops I let you in.”

“You got it.” You don't even remember what apartment button you pressed anyway.

The door lock unlatches, allowing you entry. The stairs look daunting in your current state and you slip off your heels, risking the dirty floors to a rolled ankle.

When you get to his door, you have the thought to message someone where you're at. He didn't kill you last time, but you never know. Things could change.

You send a message to Sami.

You: At Max's. If I don't message by morning assume I'm dead.

It's a little dramatic, sure, but the point comes across when Sami replies almost instantly.

Love of my life😻: What do you mean, at Max's

You: I mean I'm outside his apartment door rn and I'm gonna yell at him

Love of my life😻: If you die I'm telling everyone at your funeral about how you thought a blow job literally meant blowing air on a dick until you were seventeen

You: Fine

It's a risk you're willing to take. If Sami tells everyone that he'll have to include how the guy actually came from that too. It was the best part of the whole story.

You shove your phone back into your purse, taking a moment to collect yourself before pounding on the door. There's a muffled yell from the other side and the telltale sound of approaching footsteps. No turning back now.

The door swings open to reveal Max in a look you can only call Friday night in chic. He's wearing what looks to be silk pants and a large fluffy robe that you had eyed but left alone during your extended stay. You're guessing from the large strip of his chest you can spot that he's shirtless, probably to allow his wings to unfurl. His eyes are wide at your sudden appearance.

"I- you- lamb?"

You push past him, storming into the apartment. The ambiance of the room does not match your energy. It's lit in the soft yellow glow of incandescent bulbs and calming piano music you aren't refined enough to identify lilts through the air. There’s the soft scent of lavender in the air and if it weren't for the book and wine glass filled with what can only be blood, you would think he has company over. Is he wining and dining himself?

The peaceful atmosphere of the apartment throws you a bit, but you refuse to let it distract you from why you came here in the first place. You spin on your heel, turning to face Max. He still seems to be processing your presence and before he can get a word out you yell the question that’s been rattling around in your head since Thursday afternoon.

“What the fuck was that?”

The apparent randomness of your question is enough to jar him. “What was what?”

“Don’t pretend. You were all over her. Sugar? Is that your thing, do you come up with a little nickname for each new partner to make them feel special? That’s sick, you know.”

You hate the look on Max’s face. It’s one of surprise but also intrigue. As though he just had a eureka moment that he’s now going to use against you. His eyes flash gold. “Are you jealous?” he asks.

You scoff. “Jealous? You think I am jealous?”

Unbelievable. Truly. More so than his horns and wings, this turn of events is simply unbelievable. You came here to yell at him for his disgusting and perverse display in a place of business and he tries to turn it around on you.

You watch as some of Max’s features become more monstrous. His eyes shift color, ears becoming pointed once again, and those stupid, ridiculous horns make themselves known. The effect they have on you is infuriating. You’re rooted to the spot, staring at him with open disbelief, waiting for him to say something more.

Max walks towards you, and you can see his body grow larger with each step. Somewhere, in the back of your mind, you wonder why he doesn’t just keep his size at all times. He would certainly be marked as a large man, but nothing too out of the ordinary. As soon as you begin to ponder over it, you admonish yourself. You didn’t come here to wonder about his human disguise. You came here to yell and you aren’t done yet.

“You really have some nerve, you know that? And to think I had just told my friends about you too,” you shout.

Max’s smile only widens, his arm wrapping around your waist while his other hand comes up to cup your cheek. Your jaw is tiny in his palm, easily cradling it entirely while his thumb gently passes over your lips, effectively silencing you.

Your pulse is racing. You want to push him off, tell him that he can go fuck himself in a fit of righteous glory, and strut back out into the night. Instead your breath shudders, letting Max take his time looking at you before he speaks again.

“It’s okay to be jealous, little lamb. Did you think I would show her all of this?” he asks.

You know your eyes give you away. He managed to hit the nail on the head, a truth that you barely allowed yourself to fully process or consider. Max moving on so quickly had only been part of the pain.

What hurt even more was that you had thought yourself special, that for whatever reason, he had revealed himself to you and no one else, only for that idea to come crashing down in seconds. It was stupid and more than a little selfish, but it was true. To think there was even the smallest chance that he would easily reveal himself to Rebecca as he had to you was unbearable.

Max offers you a small pout. You want to bite his stupidly plush lower lip. "My sweet little lamb."

You don't want to give in. You want to hold your ground, yell a bit more, maybe even throw something and yet, you can't help but relax into his touch. His body pressing against yours still feels better than anyone else's ever has and you can feel your resolve slipping.

Max leans down and just before he kisses you he whispers, "There's only you."

You let your purse fall to the floor. Max's lips slot over yours like they're meant to be there, slow and careful. Your anger melts beneath him.

Max's tongue slips between your lips and the kiss grows more heated. Your hands fumble, finding the tie around his robe and pushing it from his shoulders. Once it falls Max picks you up, walking you to his bedroom while trailing gentle bites and kisses down your neck. The bruises he left earlier this week have begun to heal and he seems intent on refreshing them, leaving you marked as his.

He sets you down gently on the bedroom carpet, guiding your lips back to his. His hands slide over your body, pulling at your clothes as though he wants to take them off. For some unknown reason he’s stopping himself and you move back from the kiss. “You can take them off,” you tell him.

“Are you sure, lamb?” Max is looking deeply into your eyes, as though he’s searching for a different answer than the one you just gave.

“Yes.”

He takes his time – peppering kisses between each layer you have on. When you’re left in just your bra and panties, he lays you back against the bed, worshipping every exposed inch. He mumbles gentle words into your skin, ones that you barely catch until he’s lavishing attention along your collarbones.

“So perfect, too good for me, thought I lost you…” The last one makes you pause.

You wind your fingers into his hair, careful to avoid his horns, and gentle tug until you’re able to bring his face back up to yours. “What do you mean, thought you lost me?” you ask. You're gentle about it, trying not to seem judgemental or break the nearly reverent atmosphere.

Max looks embarrassed, like he got caught spilling a secret he didn’t mean to share. He can’t hold your eye when he answers. “I thought you were done with me. That after you left Thursday morning I’d never see you again.”

Your heart breaks a little at his tone, but even more so you’re confused. “Why would you think that?”

You sit up on the bed, cradling Max’s face in your hands. You give him time to answer, slowly tracing a finger over his defined facial features. There’s a knit in his brow, as though he’s trying to puzzle things out for himself.

“You didn’t stay and I never got to ask to see you again. You said bye.”

You’re still not sure you’re understanding. “I had to go to work, Max. You had my number, you could have called or texted.”

Max huffs, sitting up with you. The memory foam dips with his larger weight, tilting your body into his. “Most- most people don’t stick around after. I figured you’d had your fill and wanted to be done with me.”

You can see the hurt on his face. There’s no way for you to know how many people have rejected, rebuffed, or used Max over the years. Hell, you don’t even know how long Max has been alive for, but you don’t need numbers to understand pain. To know what it is to not be appreciated or even somewhat cherished.

You climb into Max’s lap, wrapping your arms around him as far as they will go and bury your head into his chest. The chill of his skin doesn’t bother you, even as his arms fall around your shoulders and wrap you in a frosty hug.

“I’m so sorry, Max.” You know your apology won’t suddenly make things right for him, but you hope that it can at least start to make it better. “I didn’t want to leave. I was already debating if it was weird to text and ask you out for tonight,” you tell him. The honesty feels strange but good, the need to build a wall between yourself and your feelings towards him gone.

You begin to press chaste kisses into his chest and push against him until he falls back against the mattress, your body draped across him. “Max, can I show you just how much I wanted to stay?”

Max nods, shifting his hips to help you as you slide his pants and boxers off. He’s only half-hard and you’re already wondering how you’re going to take him. In your days spent with him, oral was something he never pushed. You had asked at one point, wanting to reciprocate, and he’d redirected by fingering you instead. Well, we’ll figure it out as we go.

You lick a broad stripe up your palm, taking him in hand and start to slowly pump, feeling him harden under your steady ministrations. You keep your eyes on his face, watching as his head tips back into the pillows. He’s still holding onto parts of his human visage and you can’t help but wonder why. If it’s more comfortable that way, like not lying on his wings you understand, but holding the rest of it in can’t be truly relaxing.

“Max?” you say, running your free hand over his brow. “You can let go. I’ve got you.”

Max’s twitches in your hand and you watch as he appears in his full glory before you. He's breathtaking, laid out underneath you like this.

You move down his body, positioning yourself between his muscular legs. Max's eyes remain trained on you as you begin to kiss down his stomach, skipping down to his thighs. You murmur words of affection between each press of your lips.

It doesn't take long before Max is moaning beneath you, beads of precum starting to trail down his cock. When he speaks, Max's voice hits a deep pitch that travels right to your own pooling arousal. "Stop teasing me, lamb."

You move away from him, eliciting a whine that stops short when he realizes what you're doing. You take off your bra and panties, tossing them to the floor, and then swiftly turn back to Max and wrap your lips around his cock.

His hands jump to you in surprise – not forcing you further down, but instead moving your hair out of the way. You swirl your tongue around the fat head, moaning at the slightly salty taste of his precum. You're only able to take half of him before you can feel the edges of your gag reflex giving you warning.

Your hand covers what you can't otherwise fit, pumping him while bobbing your head. The noises coming from Max are sinful. He doesn't even need to breathe and yet his voice is catching, making you wonder when the last time anyone did this for him was.

You can't help yourself. Watching Max fall apart beneath you, knowing that you're the one making him feel this good is getting you worked up. You slip your hand down, gathering some of your own arousal before circling your clit.

Max's eyes widen when he realizes what you're doing and his hips buck, making you gag. You pull off to catch your breath, a line of spit still connecting your lips to his cock. When you go to wrap your lips around him again he stops you, a single finger under your chin.

"Won't be able to last, babe."

You can't help but smile at the compliment. Max's eyes are half lidded, a dopey look on his face that allows his fangs to peek through.

"Come here," he rumbles.

His hands are already inching down towards you as you climb over top of him but you bat them away. You're plenty aroused and you don't want to wait – feeling the stretch of him will be worth it.

You position him at your entrance, taking your time as you sink down onto him. You brace yourself on Max's chest, fingertips digging into his pecs. Max doesn't seem you care, his own hands firmly holding onto your waist.

Once you're finally able to take every inch you pause, taking a moment to feel him inside of you. You lean down, pressing more kisses and praise into him before starting to roll your hips.

"F-fuck, Max. You're so b-big. Handsome."

You push your hand behind Max's head, angling it so that your foreheads press together as you increase your speed. His irises are swirling, reminding you of when glitter is spun in a glass.

Max shifts slightly, somehow pushing deeper into you. You're certain you're leaving indents in his chest from how tightly your fingers flex, but Max only groans with pleasure beneath you.

"Close," you moan, your hips losing their rhythm.

Your vision flashes white, little stars appearing, your legs shaking as you clench down around Max. You can feel that he's close too, and in a haze you pull his head closer, placing soft kisses over every inch of his horns.

The combined sensations of you fluttering around his cock and lavishing attention on his horns is too much for Max to handle. He hardly warns you, not that you have the presence of mind to care, before cumming deep inside of you.

Neither one of you attempts to move. You flop your head down onto Max's chest, mindlessly stroking his bicep. Max's hand is running along your spine, making a chill run through you. He chuckles when your body twitches from it.

You look up towards him and smile. "Do you believe that I want you now?"

He kisses the top of your head. "I believe you, lamb. Give me a few minutes and I'll show you how much I want you."

There's a knock at the door. You're surprised, considering you hung up with the pizza place only 5 minutes ago, but you shrug and go to answer it anyway. You double check the knot on the robe – Max's fluffy one, now yours, before opening the door.

The knocks increase in urgency and you open the door just as the person's fist comes down again.

"Ow, shit!" you yell, holding your head where you were just inadvertently punched.

Max is next to you before you can even look up at your attacker. "Who the fuck are you?"

A familiar voice answers him. "I'm here to make sure my best friend isn't dead, asshole."

The pain is already subsiding and you look to see Sami standing in front of you, looking pissed. Right. The text you were supposed to send. Oops.

Additional note: I am blown away by the response monster Maxie got and honestly I'm having a ton of fun with him. Please feel free to send me asks and questions about him, I would love to add to this silly little series with more chapters, headcanons, whatever!! I want to answer whatever questions you've got

Everything Taglist: @janebby @spideysimpossiblegirl @roxypeanut @paperbag33 @danidrabbles @honestly-shite @sharkbait77 @stevie75 @tintinn16 @doin-stuff @hdghty @salome-c @greeneyedblondie44 @snow30285 @fic-appointment @kirsteng42 @athalien @missminkylove @niki_xie @tothejedi @readsalot73 @castleamc @nakhudanyx @quietpainter @spanishmossmagnolia @kirsteng42 @dihra-vesa @sergeantbannerbarnes @ezrasbirdie @liviiii98 @prostitute-robot-from-the-future @justanotherblonde23 @mummifymecaptain @gracie7209 @klara-luise18 @mswarriorbabe80 @just-here-for-the-moment @mimimi-stuff @dumb-npc @showbuckysomelove @c-a-v-a-l-r-y @captain_pikas_world @likes-good-reblogs-even-better @shadesofnerdlygrace @mylovelycomandante @starlightmornings @afootnoteinyourhappiness @girlwholoveswords @my-blink-romance

[wakaoujisenhime]

Hi Hi could I request Kuroko, Kagamai, Akashi, Midorima and Murasakibara reaction to their s/o who's into photography and loves to take photos of them because they think their the most beautiful muse. They say things like "the light is hitting you perfectly please don't move until I take this picture." something like that lol

A/N: anon…this, THIS is a masterpiece of an idea and I love you for it (๑♡⌓♡๑) please enjoy! ♥️

Tags: the boys [KKMMA] x reader ✅ SFW ✅ fluff ✅

━━━━☆ ━━━━☆ ━━━━☆

Kuroko:

ok so the first time you took a picture of him was during lunch break

since he usually likes to spend his free time in the classroom while eating his homemade bento, the moment you became a couple you’d always join him

one day you were a bit late because one of the teachers had held you up, so you quickly texted him an apology for your delay and told him you’d be there soon so he can start eating without you

when you finally arrived, you immediately proceeded to apologize but promptly shut your mouth as you saw the scenery before you

Kuroko was reading one of his many novels, his elbows propped on the very edges of his desk, bento box and chopsticks untouched before him, blue eyes fixated on the text before him

everything about this was perfect as is, but what really gripped you and made you unconsciously reach for your camera, that you always had dangling from your neck, was the way the morning sun hit his face casting an ever so small shadow that only further accentuated his beautiful and calm facial features

as if in trance you gently push the small button on top of your camera and the shutter goes off

surprised by the sudden sound he turned his head in your direction and wanted to greet you but you cut him off even before he uttered a single syllable: “Tetsu, don’t move! The way the sun hits the back of your head right now is perfect…I just need to take a picture so bear with me for a moment.”

the way you had your left arm outstretched to stop any of his movements while your eyes were hidden behind the small rectangular object didn’t stop your boyfriend’s light blush to spread across his cheeks

he wasn’t used to being the only one in a photo so that alone made him a little nervous and embarrassed, but your silent comments and compliments on how his hair looked even more remarkable under the sunlight or how his facial features managed to perfectly cast shadows on his face that made him look more mature made his heart race faster than any game

luckily for your lover, this situation showed him another side of you that he rarely got to see, and who was he to interrupt your adorable mumbling just because of his embarrassment?

.

since then you used any and every opportunity to take his photo, whether it was in Maji Burger as he drank his usual smoothie or when he waited for you in front of a fountain in the park where you scheduled your date

when he finally asked you about it you proudly announced: “I’m sorry, but I can’t help the fact that my lover is such an amazing model for basically any type of photo! I always thought that you were hiding your beauty beneath those bangs and turns out I was absolutely right!”

you continued showering him with compliments until he couldn’t take it anymore and shut you up with a gentle kiss

“If it weren’t for your keen eye, I could’ve continued hiding myself and avoid the other’s gazes”

“Do you hate being the center of attention that much?” you whispered out, your eyes directly peering into his own big ones

with a smile he gently caresses your cheek and answers: “Your attention is all I need.”

Kagami:

Kagami was aware of your fascination for photography, I mean how could he not be when every time the two of you were out together for different reasons, you’d always take your camera with you and snap a photo or two

what he wasn’t aware of though, was what or better said who the subject of your images was

every time you reached for your camera the lens was always aimed in his direction and it never bothered him, because he figured that you were taking a photo of the scenery behind him so he never bothered to pose, smile, or anything of that sort

one day though it made him wonder whether his presence might disturb whatever images you’d taken so the next time you aimed your camera he turned his head, looking directly into the object’s circular lens, and just as he was about to say something the familiar sound of the shutter shut him up

“Perfect…that might be the best one yet” you silently praised and smiled to yourself

W-Wait a second…

“(Y/N)?”

“Hm?”

“What did you just photograph?”

you looked at him with slightly wide eyes, confusion spreading across your face as you answered: “Why of you of course”

and that’s when it clicked

all this time you’d taken pictures of what he thought to be the nature and scenery but in actuality, it was him you’d focused on

“W-Wait! You mean to t-tell me that I wasn’t in the way of your photos a-and that you actually photographed–“

before he could finish his sentence he realized something else that made him blush even harder

Perfect…Absolutely breathtaking…I’m so glad that I took my camera with me…The lighting and wind make you even prettier…What tranquility and gentleness, I’m in love…You’re so beautiful

all these comments that he’d brushed off, thinking that they were some kind of weird quirk of yours that resembled his captain’s whenever he talked about his samurai series, now made perfect sense

when the reality of the situation hit him he couldn’t help but bury his face in his hands and grunt at his stupidness, meanwhile, you tried to wrap your head around what Kagami had been believing up until today

looking at him being that frustrated with himself made you chuckle, but it also made you feel bad since you never directly told him so you decided that now might be the best time

with a gentle smile, you once again raised the camera to your face, waited until his figure became the focus and blurred the background, and gently pressed down the shutter

the sound made the young man beside you flinch and ever so hesitantly glance up to you with a dreading expression on his face

after pushing some of the buttons you cozy up to your boyfriend until your shoulders touched and showed him the image you had just taken with a proud smile

“I’m sorry for not telling you about it, but if I shared the fact that you’re my muse with you, you probably would’ve never allowed me to take any” you reasoned as you looked into his eyes and observed the way his cheeks reddened the moment you called him your muse

“I’m your muse…?”

you nodded and showed him a few other photos that all showed him do average everyday things such as eating something, chatting on his phone, warming up, etc. and even though they weren’t that special, the way you managed to capture him, his expression, and even some of the background made them all look professional

“Taiga, you’re such a nice guy that you would’ve probably offered to be my model if I had asked you to, but I wanted to capture that raw beauty of yours, the one that you display on every basketball match and that was the only way to do it…or at least that’s what I thought”

you paused before returning to the most recent image

“Having you being aware might be better after all…just look here at the way your eyes sparkle and your posture, both tense and relaxed at the same time gives off the impression of confidence and a tinge of uncertainty, both summing up your profound character that I love so much”

listening to your explanation made his heart beat harder against his chest and to stop you from fawning even more he covered your camera with his big hand and murmured: ”I-It’s fine already…I get it”

after seeing yet another unexpected expression on your boyfriend’s face you tried to get another shot of him, but this time he tried his best to avoid you and the two of you ended up chasing each other around the park, attracting the attention of many fellow visitors, but to you, it was as if only Kagami and you existed

Midorima:

one afternoon during the end of basketball practice, you had joined your green-haired boyfriend with his supplementary exercises, observing him and the perfect way he shoots one three-pointer after the other

you’d asked him long ago whether it was alright with him to take his photo and despite the many protests he’d agreed under the condition that it happened during basketball practice

unfortunately, the way he played didn’t manage to ignite the spark you needed to snap that one photo you’ve always been hoping for, neither his skills nor his playstyle were to blame for that, there was just something missing that you couldn’t name

the way you sighed caught Midorima’s attention and made him stop mid-throw so that he could take a glance in your direction and when he saw the disappointed face you made it made his heart ache

“Is something the matter (Y/N)?” he suddenly asked as he sat beside you, towel in one hand and his drinking bottle in the other

you shook your head and tried to play it off, blaming your bad mood on one of your earlier classes and the complaisant boyfriend he was he let it go (also partially because he was afraid that if he prodded further you’d get mad)

out of the corner of your eyes, you could see how he took off his glasses and started cleaning them

and that’s when your heart throbbed

the way his long fingers carefully handled the fragile black frames, the skillful and cautious way he removed any speck of dust from the glass, mixed with the way some of his green hair’s strands stuck to his slightly sweaty forehead, and lastly his beautiful long eyelashes were what won you over

before you knew it, you had grabbed your camera and had taken a photo of his profile, the shutter’s sound startling both him and you

“D-Did you just take a ph–”

“Shush! Stay just like that!” you blurted out, your hand on his chest to restrict his movements and keep him in that exact pose he was right now

with a reluctant expression on his face, he avoided looking in your direction, hoping that you wouldn’t notice the light blush spreading across his cheeks, meanwhile you smiled to yourself at his futile attempt and once again snapped another picture…

.

thanks to that one coincidental photo you managed to take back then, you finally knew what you have been missing all this time, namely your boyfriend being himself and not the Midorima Shintaro from Shuutoku who never missed a shot

in order to achieve that “normality” you had to take as many sneaky shots as possible, but they unfortunately never stayed as secretive as you would’ve wanted them to be because he either caught you mid-photo or your own comments betrayed you

Just like that Shin, look more to the side!

Leave your glasses be, you’re even more beautiful without them!

Don’t touch your hair! The way it is right now compliments your face perfectly!

Even if you scowl at me, you still look good!

he’d always run up to you afterward, blushing at the entire situation and no matter how much he ended up protesting, scolding you, or trying to take the camera from you to delete the photos, he never truly was upset about it

the reason Midorima let it all slide was because he enjoyed the way you smiled when you looked at the images you’d taken

the way your eyes practically sparkled mixed with the slight flush of your cheeks made his heart race every single time

“Is something wrong Shin? You’ve been staring at my face for quite a while.”

embarrassed of being caught by you, he squeezed your nose and stuttered: “I-It’s nothing, k-keep looking at y-your photos!”

Murasakibara:

taking Murasakibara’s pictures wasn’t an issue, you simply asked him and he agreed with no resistance whatsoever

you were over the moon at first and even made sure to have your camera with you at all times so that when an opportunity presented itself you’d be ready

from a pedestrian’s point of view, you looked like a cute touristic couple which consisted of the somewhat bored boyfriend, who agreed to have his photos taken for your happiness, and you, who couldn’t hold the excitement of being together with this young man back while happily snapping one pic after the other

their thoughts weren’t that off from the truth, you truly were delighted to be able to practice your hobby, and even having the tall young man as your model made it even better

thanks to the amount of muscles he’d gained from his daily basketball training, his height, his beautifully long and purple hair, his constantly relaxed expression, and his surprisingly gentle facial features, your boyfriend was already photogenic as is so any photo you took was downright breathtaking

and yet, those fulfilling feelings were rather short-lived

as time went by and you shot one photo after the other you came to realize that you hadn’t managed to take a single photo where he genuinely smiled or grinned

getting him to do either was nearly impossible, even for you

all you ever managed to summon was a very loving and gentle smile that resembled that of an angel; it was so pure that you could read all of his emotions from it, but that smile was reserved for your cuddle sessions that always ended up with him almost crushing you with his embrace and his low giggles as the result to your mixed reactions

“(Y/N)-chin, let’s go over there and sit down…I can’t walk anymore”

you giggled and took his hand that he’d extended to you, following him to a bench that was protected by a couple of trees, which cast down a perfect shadow on the wooden surface

the young man plopped down as if he’d ran for hours without a single break and wrapped his big arms around your waist, burying his face in your tummy

his childish behavior made you giggle and you softly caressed his head

“Didn’t you want to eat your snacks?” you asked after a short while, only to receive a silent growl as an answer

“Let me stay like this for a while…please”

his cute way of pleading with you only broadened your smile, which turned it into a grin as soon as an idea popped into your mind

with one hand still on his head, you used the other to aim the camera lens at the young man’s head as you asked your lover to look up at you

it took him a short while to comply because he kinda had the feeling that you wanted to ask for yet another photo, but he ultimately gave in and cast his purple eyes up to you

still smiling you glanced at the small screen on your camera in order to make sure that everything was perfect when you subconsciously blurted out: “Everything about you is charming Atsushi, the way the wind caresses your hair, perfectly accentuating your gentle face’s features…I’m so glad to have you as my muse”

…

…

your eyes went wide as you noticed the change in his expression

his cheeks had taken on an unexpected shade of deep red, one that you’ve never seen on him before; his eyes were a bit glassy and maybe equally as wide as yours, and his mouth was slightly agape

“Wha-! What are you saying (Y/N)-chin?!” he screamed out and once again hid his face before you could manage to snap a picture of this rare expression

“Atsushi, wait don’t hide! Let me take a photo!”

your protests fell on deaf ears and no matter how much you struggled or tried to loosen his grip around your waist, his strength made sure to make all of your attempts futile

“I-If I let you see me like that…I won’t be cool in your eyes anymore a-and I don’t want that” he finally admitted in a low voice

it took you a short while to comprehend what exactly he was trying to say; and when you did you couldn’t hold your laughter in any longer, ruffled his hair, and kissed the top of his head, waiting until he had regained his composure and returned your affectionate gestures

Akashi:

having the famous Emperor as your lover was like a dream, but when it came to keeping things a secret you were at a clear disadvantage because this man read you like an open book

no matter how hard you tried to act innocent or clueless, he’d always be able to add two and two together and expose whatever you were hiding within a matter of minutes

same goes for your fondness of photography and the fact that you had your eyes set on him as your muse

one day when you visited his home the two of you were in the living room and he was playing a round of shogi against himself while you sorted your camera’s gallery

when you took a glance at the young man your heart throbbed

the soft light of the sun that managed to come forth between the many clouds of that day shone right at him; in order to block the light from disturbing his vision, he’d leaned his chin on his hand and let his fingers extend to the corner of his mesmerizing eyes; a soft smile adorned his lips as his left hand stretched out to move one of the many wooden pieces before him

you couldn’t help it and immediately proceeded to take a picture, successfully catching him off guard

“Did you take a picture of me?” he asked without shifting his line of sight from the board, a hint of amusement in his voice

“Mhm, I did…sorry” you apologized before sighing to yourself, “it’s just that you looked really beautiful and I thought it’d be a shame if I didn’t use the opportunity.”

being called beautiful was something he wasn’t used to, so as he heard that word pass your lips, he froze up and finally tore his attention away from the game, and now gazed at you with a warm smile

“You can take more if you’d like.”

“R-Really?”

and with that, he became your conspirator in your mission to take as many photos of him as your camera’s storage could handle

.

“Just like that Sei…look more to the lef- yes, perfect!”

you spat one command after the other as the young man before you held onto the reins of his gorgeous white horse and let his hand gently run along the animal’s head

after snapping a few more photos you looked at them in silence, an unusual scene for your boyfriend

“Is something the matter (Y/N)? Aren’t you satisfied with these?”

your head shot up and you violently shook your head, explaining that it was nothing and you were just lost in thought; even though he quickly realized that you weren’t telling the truth, he chose to keep silent until you were ready to tell him what truly bothered you

unexpectedly, your silence lasted longer than he’d hoped for and no matter how unique he tried to organize these little photo sessions you did, your mood never seemed to improve which frustrated him

when he saw you sitting on the couch all sad and unmotivated while you scrolled through your camera roll, he immediately turned around and went back outside to his garden to mull over ways in which he could help you out

so to distract himself, he picked up his basketball, started dribbling, and began perfecting his shooting

the sound of the ball hitting the wall caught your attention, causing you to get up and search for its source

when you opened the front door you were greeted by a similar sight as the one back when you’d first taken Akashi’s photo which made you smile

“Sei-chan, that’s what I was looking for” you whispered as you subconsciously took a photo of the exact moment where the young man jumped and gently threw the ball against the wall, simulating a layup shot

still unaware of your presence the young man wiped his sweat with his shirt’s collar and the moment he felt your arms wrap around his body he jumped ever so slightly

before he could ask you anything, let alone say something, you kissed his cheek and whispered: “I knew it…you’re always beautiful, but the moment you shine the brightest is when you’re being yourself”

moved by your words he turned around, returning your embrace and kissing your lips as he then proceeded to hide his blushing face and glassy eyes from you by pressing you closer to himself

[starlightxsvt]

3 dates | epilogue

pairing ➳ badboy!Seungcheol x female!reader

genre ➳ badboy au, romance, some fluff, angst, bad attempt at humour, gets spicy at the end.

word count ➳ 3.5k (total 15.6k)

warnings ➳ cursing, mentions of killing, mentions criminal activities, slight violence(non explicit), smoking, ma man Seungcheol ain't your typical badboy, blackmailing, reader does all sorts of risky things cuz she's a SIMP, blood(nothing explicit), kissing, marking, some breast worshipping, grinding, reader is horny lol. (Please lemme know if I forgot anything.)

a/n : here's the epilogue to 3 dates since tumb1r won't let me post the whole fic in one post :) Enjoy!

Part 1

As time progresses and days turn into weeks and then into months you are not left with the luxury to cry over Seungcheol. Instead you are bombarded with assignments and projects from your uni and you drown yourself completely in work to forget the scathing pain. Katelyn figured out something is wrong with you and even though talking about that man pains you too much, you told her that you are done with him and you won't be seeing him again in this lifetime. Katelyn did not ask any questions after that as you said you needed time to heal, time to forget even though you have serious doubts he'd ever leave your mind.

You have also applied for an internship to keep you even busier so that when you return home you are too tired to let the thoughts of him plague your mind as you drift off to sleep. And just like that, you have developed a routine, work, eat and sleep, trying your best to allow yourself to not think about him.

Despite that sometimes, some very few times, you think of him, wonder how he's doing, wonder if he's safe. You ponder if he thinks of you, if he regrets his decision but you don't have any answer. You simply hope he does.

-

After another day full of assignments and projects you almost doze off to sleep as soon as you hit your bed until you are intruded by the loud ringing of your phone. Annoyed, you reach for it, wondering who would be calling so late.

The caller ID has your heart doing a backflip, the name you were unable to delete from your heart and your phone flashing on the screen as you instantly sit up in your bed. It's Seungcheol.

Why is he calling so late?

You wait a few seconds, scared to pick up, scared that he might have called accidentally. But before you lose your chance, you inhale deeply and pick the call up. "Hello?" You speak, your voice tentative.The silence from the other end makes your heart fall and your suspicion come true. He called you accidentally and now he will realize it and hang up. You're about to speak again when his voice floats through.

"Hi."

The emotions you feel are overwhelming, undescribable. You're relieved, you're sad, you're excited, you want to cry and scream at the same time. That one word from him has you feeling tingles all over and makes you feel like you just did a hundred laps. Anyhow you manage to speak. "Hey." Your voice almost cracks and tears almost slip past your cheeks. You don't know why you are so emotional. "I just...I just wanted to hear your voice." He sounds so tired...so dejected and your heart breaks. Never in your life did you imagine him to call and say those words to you but instead of feeling happy, a current of melancholy hits you.

Why does he sound so broken?

"Seungcheol? Is...is everything alright?" Your voice is feather like, soft and careful. You hear him sigh loudly and you get your answer. Instead of replying to you, he asks, "How have you been?"

"I'm...fine," you lie. You have been nowhere near fine. He hums noncommittally and you're about to ask him the same question before you realize how dumb it would be. If his voice is any indication he is anything but fine. "____?" He calls your name softly. "Y-yes?" You whisper.

He stays silent, for so long that you think he hung up. "I- I just...can I see you?" He seems to have a hard time gathering his words.

What? You lurch out of bed pushing your covers aside in excitement, trying to prevent a gasp out of your lips. Did you even hear correctly? He wants to see you?

"Wha... what do you mean?" You mumble. You hear him sigh loudly, "I...I am in front of your apartment. Just come down for a minute." You don't need to hear any more words as you are dashing towards your front door in your pajamas, not disconnecting the call. You take the elevator and come out of the building as fast as possible, bumping into things in your way but not giving a care. You feet stops as you stand in front of the entrance to your building, eyes searching wildly for Seungcheol. "Stay there," his voice comes through the phone, just as you spot him standing on the opposite to your building, decently far but not far enough that you can't see.

A horrified gasp leaves your mouth as your eyes finally land on him.

He stands there, bruised, his beautiful face marred with scratches and wounds, his clothes having patches of dirt and if you are seeing correctly his left arm is bleeding as he holds the phone next to his ear with the other.

"Seungcheol-" you're about to rush towards him. "Don't move." He cuts you off, looking you in the eye. Even from afar you don't miss the dark, commanding gaze of him. "Just...just stay there. Just...let me look at you."

No- why is he doing this?

Tears slip down your cheeks, "Seungcheol-" You are interrupted once more, "Please. I- I missed you and...I needed to see you. Just let me hear your voice and look at you like this." His voice almost cracks and you can see the emotion in his eyes.

Your heart breaks.

Why does he keep doing this? Why does he keep pushing you away? Why does he torment himself like this?

You stand there, rooted to the ground, quiet sobs leaving your mouth. He comes here all bruised and wounded and expects you to stay away? How can you when you can clearly see him in pain?

You grip the phone tighter, watching him as he stands there, not moving an inch. His eyes never leaves you as he drinks you in, like this is the last time he's gonna look at you. You can't stand it anymore. Hanging up the phone you run towards him, as fast as your nimble legs can carry you. You can't stay away, you just can't. Not when he looks so hurt and lost and lonely.

Your body smashes against his as you wrap your arms tightly around his torso, your head buried in his chest. He stumbles back from the force and for a while he stays unmoved and you hold your breath, half expecting him to shove you away. But he doesn't. Instead he pulls you firmly against him resting your head on his chest while burying his face in your hair.

The tears come naturally. Loud, ungraceful sobs emerge from you as you cling to him like your life depends on it, your grip on him unyielding. Seungcheol softly pets your hair as your cries fill the silence of the cold night. You pull back just a little to look at his face and you want to once more. There's a cut above his brow and some bruises on his cheek and nose and another cut on his lower lip. But you can't bring yourself to care as you lean above to press your lips against his. You don't dare hold back, kissing him like the world is about to end. Seungcheol reciprocates, tilting your head for better access as his tongue prods into your mouth and you taste the metallic flavour of blood. The kiss is messy, all teeth and tongue, an outpour of the bottled up feelings of the last couple months.

You both take a lungful of air when you pull back and you're about to dive in for more when you realize his arm is injured. "Wha- how did this happen?" You hiccup, wiping away your tears as you gently reach for his bleeding arm. His clothes are torn at the part of the wound and from what you can see, it looks like a knife injury, a thin, slanted cut on his upper arm as if someone slashed him. "It's nothing," he says trying to push your hand away.

"It's not nothing, Seungcheol!" You're yelling before you know it. It's the exasperation, the accumulated frustration over the days that makes you snap.

Seungcheol seems to be shocked at your outburst as he blinks at you, an astonished look on his face. He's kind enough to reply honestly this time. "Got into a fight. I was outnumbered. It's okay, it's nothing serious, I've had worse," his voice is small, almost timid which is definitely unlike him.

Of course he has had worse.

You let out a tired breath. "Come on, you're bleeding. Let me help you." You wrap a hand around his uninjured arm, tugging him towards your apartment.

"No, you don't have to-" he protests but you pin him down with a look. "Please," you speak, your voice low. "I can't let you go like this. Just let me clean your wound." Seungcheol presses his lips into a thin line as if trying to prevent himself from speaking further. When no more words leave his mouth, you drag him into your building in silence.

Entering your unit you help Seungcheol sit down in your small living space as you quickly pad towards the bathroom for the first aid kit. When you return you find him looking around your place with a curious glow in his eyes similar to a child's. As your eyes meet, he sits up straighter and tries to remove his jacket. You aid him in the process, discarding the material on the floor as you take a seat next to him, the first aid kit in your lap.

Thankfully he's wearing a tank top as it gives you easy access to his biceps. You would have stopped to admire and ogle them if he wasn't hurt, which he is and you mentally smack yourself for having such thoughts right now. Seungcheol's eyes does not leave your face as he silently gazes at you and if you didn't know any better you would say he looked at you fondly.

Swallowing, you sanitize your hands before proceeding to clean his wound. Seungcheol tenses beside you, low, pained grunts leaving his lips a few times as you disinfect the cut. But he says nothing, letting you do the work and you don't speak either focused on the task at hand. You then do the same for his face and finish your work by wrapping a bandage around his bicep and sitting back, exhaling a satisfied sigh. Unintentionally your eyes connect to his and you find his scorching gaze on you, those mesmerising eyes almost piercing through your soul. Feeling self aware, you abruptly stand up, coughing to clear your throat. "You should take a shower. I have some extra clothes for my parents when they come over. My dad's clothes should fit you."

"No, it's alright. I should leave." He murmurs. "You're already here. Might as well take a shower. There's no rush," you say sternly, trying to make him agree.

Truth is you want him to stay, at least the night.

Seungcheol sits quietly for a while as if contemplating before surrendering with a sigh. "Okay." "Good. The bathroom's this way," you point towards the attached bath in your room and Seungcheol mutely follows. You offer him a towel and you dad's pajamas, hoping they'd do the job for tonight as he closes the door behind him.

As silence fill the apartment, you quietly return to your bed and sit, anxiously chewing on your lower lip. The digital clock beside your bed reads 2:50 am but your sleep is long gone.

Choi Seungcheol is here. In your house.

Will he spend the night? Or will he be his stubborn self and leave as soon as he is out? And if he does stay, will you see him in morning? Or will he be gone before the sun is up? The thoughts running rampant in your mind gives you a headache as you groan, rubbing your temples. You are sure Seungcheol feels something for you, he has to. Otherwise why would he come to you in the middle of the night? If only he told you his feelings, spilled his heart out to you rather than hiding and pushing you away. He just needs to bare himself to you, tell you what is in his heart. Why can't he do that? Why can't he just give the two of you a chance?

Your thoughts are interrupted as Seungcheol steps out the bathroom, half naked, the pajama pants hanging low on his hips as his muscled body is displayed in all its glory, making your throat dry. He looks at you before quickly looking away as an air awkwardness and tension fills the room. You hold your breath, watching him intently, not moving a single muscle as he tentatively takes a seat at the corner of your bed while wiping his wet hair with the towel hanging around his neck.

You want to tell him to stay the night, the words right on the tip of your tongue but you're terrified that it will just make him walk out here immediately. So instead you watch him with bated breath, waiting for his next move, waiting for him to say something, anything that will put an end to this deafening silence.

Seungcheol takes mercy on you.

"Thank you," he says, voice barely audible. You don't know what he's thanking you for you reply anyway. "Welcome. Though I don't know what you are thanking me for." Seungcheol remains silent for a few beats, his eyes focused on the floor before replying. "For everything. I have a lot to thank you for."

Okay.

You nod mutely, unable to figure out a reply. Another wave of silence settles in the atmosphere like a blanket. You take this time to appreciate his beautiful profile, engraving his features in your mind. The moonlight coming from your window falls on his face partially, illuminating his sculpted lineaments. You get to admire his beauty once more as he sits there but the look on his face tugs at your heartstrings. He looks troubled and in pain, the natural glow of his face somewhat dim. You wonder how the past couple of months have treated him. You wonder how life has been treating him, if he had someone to go to, someone to share his worries with all this time.

"Do you still like me?" His words make your eyes widen as it the last thing you expected to come from him. "You wouldn't be here if I didn't," your words come out harsher than you intended making you regret instantly. Perhaps the pain you have suffered for a while is coming out finally. However, seeing his silence, you reply once more, voice much softer this time, "Of course I still like you, Seungcheol. I have...I have never liked anyone or anything as much as you."

It's an understatement. What you feel for him is love but you would rather keep that to yourself.

"Why?" Seungcheol's voice comes out as a croak as his eyes connect to yours. For the first time, you see so much emotion in them and maybe, maybe even some unshed tears, though you can't be sure because the light is not sufficient right now. Your throat closes up for some reason as your eyes mirror the emotions in his and you desperately try to think, try to give him a reply that he deserves.

"You are very easy to like," you say lamely. Your reply is insufficient but that's all you can manage without starting to bawl like a child. A humourless laugh comes out of Seungcheol and echoes through the otherwise quiet room. "I doubt that," he says, his voice deep. "It's true Seungcheol," you repeat, voice firm.

A mirthless grin settles on his face and you know he isn't buying your words. Swallowing, you carefully, too carefully, scoot towards him and sit down, maintaining a little space between the the two of you. "I don't understand why you hold such negative thoughts about yourself but believe me Seungcheol, it's hard not to fall in love with you."

Your slip-up causes your eyes to widen, face drowning in embarrassment as you realize you just said the L word. Seungcheol, however, does not react to it but turns his head to study your face and the pain and sentiment in his eyes, his passionate gaze on you makes you forget human language. You've never seen nor imagined Seungcheol to be so full of ardor and pain and now that you have, you don't know what to do. You just want to cling to him and cry like a child.

"Can't you see how fucked up I am? What and awful person I am, ____? Someone like me deserves noth-" Unable to hold yourself back you interrupt him by cupping both of his cheeks and pressing your lips to his. You kiss him softly, carefully, trying to gauge his feelings while trying not to push him too hard. Seungcheol stays immobilised, letting you kiss him like that. When you pull back, his eyes are closed and he rests his forehead against yours. "You are just fine, Seungcheol. I like you just the way you are. Don't...beat yourself up like this, hmm?" Your voice is just above a whisper as you tilt his head to meet his eyes. Seungcheol stares quietly at you for a while before suddenly pushing you back and caging you underneath his large body. A squeak of surprise leaves your lips as Seungcheol wastes no time wrapping himself around you while attaching his lips to yours.

This time the kiss is not soft, it is full of passion and vigour and longing as Seungcheol takes the reign. Your lips mold perfectly against each other and Seungcheol does not hold back, kissing you like a starved man; all teeth and tongue. He pulls back for a while, supporting himself on his elbows as you looks at you while you try to catch your breath underneath him. His hand comes to stroke your hair gently, like a lover and your eyes burn at his tenderness.

"Seungcheol-"

"Is there still a place for me in your heart?" He asks, a hopeful note in his voice. His words leave you breathless as you gape at him in suprise, you mouth open slightly. Seungcheol looks at you look longingly as he waits for your answer, which comes easily, without a second thought.

"Of course, Seungcheol. I...I love you."

This time it is his turn to be surprised as his pupils dilate and a soft gasp of surprise escapes from him. Swallowing, you hold his gaze, waiting for his next words but they never come. Instead, the man attacks your lips with renewed fervour while slotting a muscular thigh between your legs. As his toned thigh brushes against your core a wanton moan leaves your mouth and you wrap your legs around his waist. You can feel Seungcheol smirk against your skin while he kisses a path down from jaw towards your neck, taking his sweet time to plant some love bites along the way while you gasp and writhe underneath him. Soon he reaches the valley of your breasts and with skilled fingers he does a quick work of the buttons of your night shirt. His heated gaze remains on your now bare breasts and you can feel your nipples harden in the chill air of the room before he leans down to plant soft kisses all over them. While he does so you continue to grind your core against his leg, desperate for some friction which he is denying you. His assault on your neck and breasts don't stop as he remains focused in marking you, blooming kisses of red and purple on your skin.

"I missed you," His voice comes out as throaty whisper while he keeps his lips attached to your heated skin. "Me too," you choke between moans as his ministrations on your body leaves you aching all over for him.

He pulls back to meet your gaze, "I want you. I... always have and I've been hiding it. But I can't anymore."

"Take me then, Seungcheol," It isn't the most romantic thing to say but that is all your lust clouded brain can manage as you keep grinding yourself against him. You feel his hard on poke your belly and unlike your lover, you really can't wait anymore. You need him now.

Seungcheol keeps looking at you, too busy studying your features rather than doing something about the wetness between your legs and you're about to tell him to do something when he speaks, "I love you, ____. I'm sorry for the hurt I've caused you. Let me make it up to you."

Great. Now you're horny and emotional.

His confession brings tears to your eyes but your neediness is growing so you pull his face down closer to yours and whisper, "You can start doing that by making me cum. And then you can stay. With me. Forever. How about that?" A mischievous grin kisses his face, "I'd love that sweetheart."

You grin in happiness not wasting anymore time as you reconnect your lips with his.

a/n 2: Whew~ a whopping 15k+! I can't believe I wrote something this huge. But it was well worth it! I just hate this damn app like I don't understand?? I've seen ppl post fics with 40k+ words yet tumb1r says I've reached 250 blocks like what?? Anyhow, I really really hope you enjoyed reading this baby cuz I've been working on it for soooo long! If you did please reblog and share as always your feedbacks are highly appreciated so please leave them in the comments or my ask box!

[lubdubsworld]

物の哀れ ( ‘the sadness of things’.)

Characters : Alpha! Jungkook x Omega ! OC.

ABO Dynamics.

Genre : Arranged Marriage / Temporary contractual Marriage.

Warnings : Non- Con/ Extremely Dubious Consent . High functioning alcoholism. Genre related consent issues. Implied suicidal thoughts. 

Summary : A recently widowed Jungkook agrees to a contract marriage to keep his company afloat. His grief overwhelms him and it is hard to look at his new wife as anything other than an intruder .

[  Author’s Note :  物の哀れ ~ Mono no aware can be translated as ‘the sadness of things’. It comes from the words 物 (mono – thing) and 哀れ (aware – poignancy or pathos). The ‘sadness’ in question comes from an awareness of the transience of things, as taught by Zen Buddhism. When we view something exceptionally beautiful, we might feel sad because we know it won’t stay so beautiful forever – but appreciation only heightens the pleasure we take in the beautiful thing in that moment. ]

Chapter 1

 Chapter 2

I wrapped the white wool shawl tighter around my shoulders. The night was still chilly and the and smelt faintly of impending rain. Why they would plan a party outside while it rained, was beyond me.

After my little skirmish with Jungkook, I had found Namjoon quickly only to be told that we couldn’t leave for another hour at least because there was a  certain investor who wanted to meet Namjoon . The guy was running late and he had to wait for him. So here I stood, shivering lightly, all while keeping an eye on my husband as he got progressively drunk.

Namjoon’s words made me sigh a little.

“You can’t decide what someone else’s normal is, Namjoon. Especially when it comes to grief.  But the drinking is an issue. And you’re right about the therapist. I know she’s doing her best but I’m not sure if she has the right answers for him. Or even the right tools to help him.”

“I’ve been searching up on therapists who specialize with alphas. There’s one in Itaewon , his name is Kim Taehyung. I really think he could help. He’s an alpha himself.”

“That sounds good. Betas may not fully understand alpha mating bonds or what it’s like when one of them dies. Taehyung may have a better understanding of what Jungkook’s going through.” I nodded, a little hopeful. 

Therapy with the beta lady the hospital had recommended wasn’t really helping Jungkook the way it ought to.

Namjoon hesitated.

“Would you be willing to go with him? Taehyung insists a family member stay in the waiting room just in case...” he asked gently. I turned back to look at my husband, leaning on the mahogany countertop of the bar, fingers curled around a glass of whiskey.

“And I’m the one you want to consider for that? That’s ridiculous. Jungkook hates me.” Did I really have remind him of this salient fact? 

“I’ve offered to, before.  He doesn’t want me there." I sighed as Jungkook threw the drink back with ease.

“That was three months ago though. Things have changed now right?” Namjoon prodded.

I laughed, shaking my head.

“Not between us they haven’t. He’s spending more time with Mina and he isn’t throwing stuff around but he still loathes me.”

“He loathes what you represent: his own shortcomings and failures. Your father wasn’t kind in his approach and you are a reminder of all the things he can’t control.”

How fucking unfair,  I thought playing with the tiny  ring on my finger ( or should i say handcuff really? ), my wedding ring , the platinum band engraved with my husband’s name, a drop of his blood embossed into the metal. 

An archaic tradition, that carried no meaning in modern Seoul but the idea of it was still alive and well. The idea that what we had was a blood bond, imbued in our veins now.  An alpha’s connection with a beta or an alpha mate was usually quite fragile. But an alpha and omega mate bond. That was supposed to be powerful. 

Unless the alpha was still phantom bonded to a dead wife , that is. It was odd thing. Mate bonds had to be mutual to work. So there was no bond between Jungkook and I . We didn’t have any feelings for each other of course. But wearing someone’s blood on yourself changed that . it forced a bond that wasn’t there. It was ancient magic and it worked on my kind. Not on his. 

How fucking unfair because it wasn’t like I could control any of this either? 

I grimaced. I had thought of taking the ring off 

“Ouch.” I said with a smile. Namjoon waved off my self pity with an eye roll. 

“You know what I mean. Even for an Alpha, Jungkook has always held on to his pride. Losing his wife and his company all in the same week probably left him feeling incredibly helpless and your father browbeat him into this whole thing. Of course he isn’t going to be eager to share heart to heart talks with you. ”

I held my hand up. 

“I know all that Namjoon. I was there, remember? And I’m not blaming him for any of that. Trauma makes you do shitty things and I understand that . I also understand that if he was in his right mind he wouldn’t behave the way he does now. But that doesn’t change the fact that I can’t change his mind for him. If he doesn’t want to get help, I’m kind of helpless myself, you know?”

Namjoon reached out and squeezed my hand.  

“I’m just asking you this because , he does listen to you at times. I’ve noticed it. He doesn’t outwardly agree with you but he takes your opinions into consideration. And, Heejin you live with him and you’re the one who managed to convince him to start scenting Mina. ”

And God, how exhausting that had been. I had kept at it because Mina was so young and she needed her father’s scent to grow. And while i could be persistent when necessary,  I couldn’t work miracles. 

“Namjoon oppa, “ I said softly, trying to explain myself without sounding like a horrible human, “  I don’t hate Jungkook. Far from it. I want him to get the help he needs and I’m here for him. If you can convince him to go see Taehyung and he’s okay with me coming along, I won’t say no. Mina needs him and there’s nothing I would like more than for him to get better. ” i smiled a little, “ But he’s still going to have to be the one to make that choice. i can’t make it for him.” 

Namjoon nodded.

“ Fair enough. Well,  I’ll talk to him about it. We’ll set something up. Thank you for not refusing Heejinah. I know it can’t be easy for you either. 

I opened my mouth to respond but out of the corner of my eyes I caught a glimpse of someone, staring intently right at me.

 I turned sharply, eyes locking with those of Kim Yugyeom and I stiffened, stepping closer to Namjoon on instinct.  Yugyeom smirked, winking at me. 

I shuddered in disgust. 

Creep.

Namjoon followed my line of vision and swore.

“This motherfucker.” He made to move towards him. and I grabbed his arm, fingers digging into his forearm. The last thing i wanted to witness was an alpha alpha showdown in the middle of a party with me in the middle. 

“Please, no. Don’t make a scene. It’s what he wants.”

“Jungkook has the shittiest friends on the planet.” Namjoon shook his head and I couldn’t agree more. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mina’s appointment with the doctor went about as expected. She was right on time with her milestones and I sat in the waiting office for a mere twenty minutes before being called in. The doctor, an alpha named Min Yoongi gave me a small smile of recognition before flipping through the pages of her file.

“ Jungkook didn’t come along?” He asked casually, grabbing a pen and making a note of her weight and length before plotting it on the small graph. She was a little on the smaller side but she was growing well. 

“He’s busy...” i said with a shrug, “ So I still keep giving her the polyvisol supplements?” 

Yoongi nodded, “ The nurse will fill in the prescription for you. Are you sure he’s busy? He called me last night and told me he wanted to come see me?” 

I blinked. 

“He did ? “ I couldn’t quite process this. 

“He wanted to talk about how she’s doing and I told him he could come in for her appointment today.”

I imagined a world where Jungkook actually spoke to me, instead of forcing  me to navigate stormy waters on rotten plywood. Nine more months, i told myself firmly, already digging for my phone. Nine more months and I would be out of this living hell I’d gotten trapped in. 

“Can I try calling him? He’s probably forgotten. I think he might regret missing out.” I begged and Yoongi gave me a small smile, waving me off. 

“Of course you can Heejin-ah and tell him that if he wants I can drop by at the office and talk to him as well.” 

I nodded quickly , moving out to the waiting area while the nurses held Mina, soothing her before getting her ready for her shots. I tried calling him and not surprisingly he didn’t pick up. I called his office next and Jungkook’s secretary picked up the phone .

The woman hated me. 

“He’s busy.” She said curtly.” He’s specifically asked me not to bother him with stuff that isn’t important.” 

Her whiny voice grated on my ears and i bit my lips to keep the irritation in. 

“Since when does his daughter make that list, Ms Lee?” I said calmly and she hesitated. 

“He’s in a meeting right now and-”

“I’m in the hospital with his daughter. I hope you’re willing to take the heat when he finds out that you wouldn’t let me get through to him. “ I said casually. 

It was a twisted version of the truth for sure. Meant to imply that Mina was hurt in some way. But I couldn’t bring myself to regret it much. I had enough on my plate without dealing with twenty year old secretaries who fancied themselves in love with their hot boss. 

 “I... just a moment, Mrs. Jeon.” 

I loathed the name. It wasn’t mine. It was hers and I felt like a thief every time someone addressed me that way.

After two minutes, Jungkook’s  familiarly low and perpetually exhausted voice came out ,

“Hello? Heejin?” He sounded listless and his voice just a little slurred and i groaned. 

“Please tell me you aren’t drunk.” I whispered. 

“I’m not. “ He said shortly. “ What’s wrong? What happened? Is Mina alright? ”

“Did you tell Yoongi that you were going to meet him today?” 

He was quiet for a second. 

“i’ll talk to him.”

He hung up and I stared at the phone. I realized that I shouldn’t have called him in the first place. Should have asked Yoongi to call him himself. What was wrong with me? Even a few syllables exchanged with Jungkook felt like staring into an abyss . 

I moved back to the clinic , just as Mina plaintive wail filled the room. The shots were done. It took us another thirty five minutes to finish filling her prescriptions and for Yoongi to finish examining her. She was already dozing off and I wasn’t supposed to feed her for another thirty minutes so perhaps the nap would do her good.  I had just finished settling her into her Bjorn carrier  when Jungkook’s voice came from the entryway. 

“Is this the way to Dr. Min’s office?” 

I glanced back to watch him . He looked ridiculously handsome in a three piece suit, jacket thrown over his arm and hair lightly damp from the misty drizzle outside. I saw the secretary’s mouth actually drop open and stay agape as she tried to process his questions. i could see the way his beauty had rendered her entirely witless and as someone who had experienced it first hand , i could sympathize, 

But Jungkook was beginning to look annoyed from the lack of response and i decided to give the poor girl a break. 

“He’s waiting for you.” I called out and Jungkook startled. He glanced up at me and for some reason he looked surprised. He always looked surprised when he saw me. As if i was just some monster out of his worst nightmares turning up in odd places . As if he couldn’t quite believe that i did exist in his life now. Unwelcome but impossible to avoid. 

“You’re here.” He said blankly. 

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. 

“Yes, i am. I’ve been here for three months now. “ i said shortly, before i could stop myself, “ Mina’s fine.  She just had her shots. I’m going to drive home and put her down for a nap. Do you want me to come with you ?” I pointed at the clinic. 

He hesitated before shaking his head. 

It was all according to script then. Jungkook would never include me in a single thing. Even if i was smack damn in the middle of the room with nowhere else to go. 

“Alright. i’ll see you after work.” 

“We’ll have guests for dinner today. ” He said suddenly. 

I stared at him, confused.

“For dinner??”

“ Sooah’s parents.” 

Oh, God. 

Wary of the extra nurses suddenly filling the room, the little whispers and the curious glances, i kept my smile even. 

“Of course. ” I bowed a little before turning on my heel and walking away. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sooah’s parents were, for lack of a better word, selfish . 

They had lost a daughter, so of course i could understand with their need to keep their daughter’s memory alive. But the way they chose to do it was unhealthy and borderline vindictive. 

" She’s growing well.” Mrs. Kim had the same statuesque figure as her model daughter and she held her grandchild with a slightly unsure grip and Mina felt the uncertainty in her grip, breaking out into cries at once. I stayed still, my throat dry from disuse. I hadn’t said a word since they came in. 

We were seated at the table, dinner was done. 

Jungkook sat next to me, staring straight ahead while his father in law tried to engage him in conversation. 

With Jungkook, the grief came in waves. Some days, the waves were small and gentle, like the ones that lapped at your feet on the shore of a tranquil lake. on those days e went about his day as usual, spoke to his friends and signed deals.  And somedays they were big, behemoths carrying guilt and accusation, crashing over his head with a vengeance. 

On those days , he looked like he’d been run over by a two ton truck. 

Today was just one of those days and i could sense it.

The man was going on an on about some charity that Sooah had been involved in as a young girl... Could Jungkook make a contribution in her name?. Could Jungkook pay for a concert of her favorite singer in her hometown..?  Could Jungkook possibly consider contributing to opening a foundation in her name? 

I could feel the urge to scream, grow by the minute.

 Each syllable that spilled out of her father’s mouth was aggravating, the sentences began and ended with her name, over and over over again and It felt terribly like she was standing right next to me, ice cold and dead but real and relentless at the same time. He spoke of her like she was still alive and i couldn’t fathom how that was healthy. How that was going to help Jungkook move on.

 If anything it made it harder for him to move on. 

And in a moment of chilling clarity, i realized  that this is what they wanted. 

They didn’t want Jungkook to move on from her. They wanted him to be consumed by her. In the wake of that realization , i felt anger surge. 

There was just enough hurt and heartbreak and pain and grief in this room without these idiots adding to it. 

“Jungkook is tired tonight, uncle.. Perhaps we can discuss this later.” I said finally, unable to bear it any more.

The man gave me a glare.

“I wasn’t talking to you girl.” He said sharply. I frowned. 

“We’re trying to help Jungkook. “ The woman said sharply. “ Unlike you and your father we do not prey on the weak. “ 

Jungkook shifted at the phrase and I glared at her.

“He isn’t weak. “ I snapped, resisting the urge to add on a you bitch , “He’s grieving . And what he needs is space to process his grief. Not you people trying to shove your daughter into his throat with every sentence. “

“Don’t you dare talk about our daughter!” Mrs. Kim snarled and i felt a headache come on.

“I thought that was why you were here? To talk about her? Or should I say use her as an excuse to get money out of him??  What you’re doing is unfair and awful!! . Jungkook isn’t ready to talk about this and one look at his face should tell you that, if you even bothered looking at anything except his wallet.” I shouted. 

“Heejin, that’s enough.” Jungkook said hoarsely and i bit my lips. 

Of course he wasn’t going to support me even if we were on the same side. Defending him, protecting him was exhausting and it was such a thankless job. i wanted it to end. 

“I think we should call this a night. please, just leave” I said sharply, standing up and reaching for Mina. She glared at me but handed the baby over. 

“You don’t get to make that decision. My son in law is who I’m here to see. You’re just the parasite that’s attached herself to him. You sit there in my daughter’s place and you dare disrespect me this way. ” The woman snapped.

“Its still my house. “ I gritted out. “ I’m married to Jungkook whether you like it or not and so i have the right to ask you to get out of my house.” 

“Heejin, stop.” Jungkook’s voice only made me angrier. He sounded drained and empty and still these leeches wanted to suck him dry. And he was too  blind to see it. 

“I’m done with this” I stood up moving to the small pack and play that sat in the corner of the living room. i placed Mina in and watcher her eyes flutter shut gently. 

i turned back to stare at Mrs. Kim.

“i want the pair of you to leave. Get out before I call security.” 

She gaped at me. 

“you had a wedding... that doesn’t make it a fucking marriage. “ she sneered. “ Its probably not even legal until you consummate it. So go ahead, call the cops right now. You think i wouldn’t take you to court. ??!! ” 

She was spouting absolute nonsense, probably driven by her own grief  but i wasn’t feeling particularly charitable tonight. 

“Why don’t you ask your son in law that? Ask him if the marriage was consummated or not...” I smirked. 

She faltered, eyes wide and disbelieving.

“No. You’re lying ...he wouldn’t.” She turned to Jungkook who looked at me with fury in his eyes. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” He said sharply and I scoffed.

“With me? What the fuck is wrong with me? What the fuck is wrong with these idiots that they think they can come here and ask you to sign a fucking cheque when you’re still out here grieving for their daughter?!”

“You don’t know shit about them or her...” 

“I don’t have to. I don’t have to and i don’t care to either. All I know is that i married you and you’re my husband and whether you meant those vows or not, i did. I swore in front of my God and my family and I’m going to keep those promises. I’m going to protect you because I love your daughter . I’m going to protect you because you need to fucking live to be able to care for her. “ 

i turned to stare at his in-laws. They were staring at me, some of the fire dying out and in the span of a few minutes they somehow looked older . 

“You don’t deserve to be here.” Mr. Kim said finally, voice cracking and i exhaled. 

“And yet, here I am. And I’m not leaving. you are.” I said calmly. 

They stared at me for one more second before standing up and moving out of the dining space and into the hallways leading out. 

“We’ll call you later Jungkook-ah...” The man said before walking out of the door and slamming it shut behind him. 

The silence between us grew heavier as the seconds ticked. 

“We can’t decide how people grieve.” Jungkook said softly. 

I stared at him in disbelief. 

“You’re telling  me  that , Jungkook? Or did you forget all the times I indulged you when the only way you could grieve was apparently  by forcing yourself on me.” i snapped. 

His eyes widened , just a fraction before going blank again. 

He took a deep breath and went on. 

“They lost their daughter and they’re hurting. We can’t tell them they aren’t allowed to honor her memory...They’re clearly in pain...”

“Not more than you!” i snapped. “ You’re the one in pain here Jungkook. Your pain is so much more than theirs ..... Or may be it isn’t i don’t know.. But i do know that I can’t sit here and watch them bleed all over you when you’re cut just as deep as them.” 

“You don’t know shit about e!” He roared. “ Don’t you fucking dare talk about my grief like you can understand it...like you actually know what its like to lose the woman who had your fucking heart, because if you did you wouldn’t have agreed to this fucking marriage...you wouldn’t be here in this room with me, intruding on my grief and my pain... “

The sound of his voice made my entire body freeze in fear. I stayed perfectly still, jumping when he crossed the distance between us and grabbed my face, fingers curling around my jaw. 

“ You want to know how i wanted to grieve? I wanted to grieve in solitude!!! I wanted to grieve without some fucking stranger hovering over my shoulder like a fucking plague!”

I exhaled shakily, fingers trembling as i reached up to hold his wrist, my entire jaw throbbing with how hard his grip was. 

“It’s the price you pay for getting your company back. Jeon Jungkook. “ I choked out.” Or did you forget that marrying me is the reason you aren’t homeless on the streets “

He laughed a little yanking me closer and wrapping an arm around my waist.

“You’ve learned to talk back these days...” He muttered , “ I think I preferred the girl who hid in the nursery for the first three weeks of our wedding.” 

“I wasn’t hiding . I was avoiding you. Because your misery was contagious and i didn’t want any of it on me.” I snapped and his hold on my waist tightened. 

“Are you trying to make me angry? ” He snapped, fingers curling on my waist and I swallowed the whimper of pain that threatened. 

“Maybe i am... Maybe anything is better than watching you walk around this house like a corpse. You’re alive so I don’t see why you act like you died with her.” 

He growled at that, eyes blazing as he stepped back enough to stare into my face. 

“You’re right... I didn’t die with her. Although i wanted to...Maybe if i wasn’t such a fucking coward, i would have gone through with it.  .” He laughed and I felt my heart go ice cold at the very thought of it. 

“You didn’t die... So why don’t you get some help. There’s no shame in getting help... Taehyung...”

“I don’t need help. i need to be alone.” He snarled. “ I need to be allowed to cry and mourn my wife the way I want to but you and your father made sure that i couldn’t.”

I sighed, looking away in defeat. 

“Fucking look at me!” He snarled, hands grabbing both my arms and yanking me forward. “ Why won’t you look at me huh?  is the guilt finally catching up?” 

“No. No guilt. Just loathing and resentment.” I snapped back and he laughed again.

“Well too bad. Because you know what? You’re right. I paid for my company with my right to grieve and you...you paid for my name with your right to say no . “ 

I swallowed as he yanked me away from the table, dragging me to the couch in the side. 

“ I never refused you a thing.” I choked out, breathing ragged as he shoved me into the soft leather surface, crawling on top of me at once. “ I only said no when you were drunk out of your mind. When you thought it was okay to fuck me and call me by her name.” 

He made swift work of the buttons of my blouse and I stayed still, arms lying by my side. 

“ Are you telling me you want this ? You expect me to believe you want my hands on your body?” He sneered, fingers moving up to grip my hair. “You don’t want this and you don’t want me....Just like i don’t want you either. i’ll never want you. ” 

“You don’t want me.??.. You have a funny way of showing it..”  I scoffed , staring right into his eyes rolling my hips up into his  , greeted by the hard press of his length against my thigh.   “ And to be honest i don’t give a damn if you’re still in love with her , all I want is my name on your lips if you want to get off with me. Because I’m not just a toy you can use to replace your dead wife. I have  a name and you should remember it.  "

He growled again, fingers squeezing hard against the back of my head till my scalp felt like it was on fire.

“I hate you. “ He said clearly. “ I hate you and everything you’ve done to me.” 

“Everything I’ve done to you? Oh you mean save your life? Taek care of your baby girl like she was my own? Give you the chance to rebuild your entire career.? Turn you into multi millionaire again?  Good. Hate me. The feelings mutual. “ I snapped. “Now if you hate me so much why are you still here? Get off me.” 

“I’m not going anywhere, wife.” He sneered. “ Because like you said, I’ve paid for this.” He drawled, reaching down and squeezing between my legs. “And I’d be a pretty bad businessman if i don’t collect from my investments.” 

Before I could retort, he pulled back, just enough to grab me by the waist and flip me over on my front. I flinched when he grabbed my arms, yanking them back and trapping my wrists together in his fist at the base of my spine. My cheeks pressed into the leather couch, sticky and uncomfortable. 

i heard the sound of his zipper, the clink of his belt buckle. 

Coward. 

I shivered when he pushed my skirt up.

“Don’t enjoy this too much, yeah?” I snapped, “ You hate me remember?” 

“Easy enough to forget its you when I don’t have to look at you.” he retorted. 

He slipped one arm under my waist, lifting me up just enough for him to yank my panties down. 

“Just remember , you don’t get to blame the alcohol for this .” I sneered. “ You’re sober and clear headed and you’re hard for me. “ 

Somehow that seemed to bother him.

He stopped . 

I could feel the hesitation in his limbs. 

It made me laugh. 

“You know Jungkook, i took you for lot of things but a coward wasn’t one of them.”

“What the fuck does that mean huh? I should put you in your fucking place for how insolent you are with me... ” he pressed down on me and i gasped when I felt his chest pressing into my back, his face inches from my own. I flinched when he sank his teeth into the mating mark on my neck. 

“it means that if you’re going to do this, if you’re going to talk big about putting me in my place like the big bad alpha that you are, at least own up to the fact that you’re attracted to me. ” 

“ You forget your fucking place, omega.”  he hissed, voice sharp and furious against my ear. “ Another word out of that mouth and i won’t be responsible for what i do.” I gritted my teeth when he curled his fingers around the inside of my thigh, parting my legs and settling in between. 

He pushed into me in one strong thrust and my eyes flew open in shock. 

“Fuck.... why are you so fucking tight...” He groaned and my shoulders began to throb as he fucked into me, setting a punishing speed that left both of us panting . We were too fucking would up for it to last any longer than a few minutes and yet, i could feel pleasure swell inside me, wetness seeping out of me and onto the leather couch beneath us. 

I wondered just how fucked up this whole thing was. Just how much damage were we doing to each other?? But it was hard to care too much about it, because even if though it was a terrible way to talk things out at least he had talked. It was nothing new....nothing earth shatteringly enlightening but he had said it all out loud and that made a difference. 

“You think you can come into my life and dictate how i fucking live.” He grunted against my ear, fingers tightening on my hair. “ it pisses me off.” 

“Everyone dies, Jungkook. People die and they leave loved ones behind but Life goes on. It has to go on. You can’t just pause life to grieve. Mina needs you.” I felt my eyes begin to sting with tears, the adrenaline from the argument fading and my body threatening to go limp as he drove into me at the same punishing pace. 

He didn’t respond, fingers closing around my throat and squeezing lightly instead.

“Save your platitudes before i decide that the warmth of your body isn’t worth the grate of your voice on my ear.” He snapped and I whimpered when he stilled, spilling into me. 

He stayed pressed up against me. breathing harshly against my ear and i waited till both our breaths evened out. 

“It’s not selfish to move on Jungkook. You aren’t insulting your wife’s memory by wanting to move on.  “ I said softly. ” Someday your heart and mind will agree with me. Whether you like it or not. That’s just how pain works, Jungkook. One day it’ll pack itself up and walk out of your heart in the middle of the night. You just have to hold on till then.” 

He didn’t reply, merely drawing himself up and off me. 

Once i heard the door to his bedroom slam shut i dragged myself up , thighs shaking and sticky. I grimaced at the mess on the couch. I stared at the packet of baby wipes on the table nearby and shuddered. That just felt wrong. 

I’d just have to go grab a washcloth from the bathroom. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On that weekend, we had another dinner to attend, this time with a few investors from out of the country or so Namjoon told me. 

Although we didn’t talk about what happened and he didn’t try to touch me again, things were subtly different. 

Something had changed in the way Jungkook behaved with me. There was a little less of the usual zombie like indifference and he actually seemed to be avoiding alcohol actively. It was a welcome change. But to make up for it, Mina went into a growth spurt. Which meant ten minute naps every hours or so with wailing sobs in between. 

i was exhausted. 

So much so that Jungkook told me that he didn’t want to pick Mina up from Seokjin’s place till the next day. 

It was a little past one in the morning when I finally trudged into the apartment. Jungkook wasn’t black out drunk but he was definitely a little loose limbed, eyes just a shade more glassy than usual.

“Tonight went well. I’m thinking the guy from Macau is definitely going to consider investing.” He muttered, gripping the door frame and taking off his shoes.

I toed my own heels off, feeling upset and bereft.

“Why would you tell Jin oppa that we’ll get Mina in the morning? She’s not used to being away the whole night.” I complained, feeling jittery and nervous because the house felt so empty and strange .

I didn’t like the idea of being alone with Jungkook without the buffer of his daughter between us. The house felt foreign, the walls seemingly closer together , the space to cramped.

Jungkook dropped his keys in the bowl and tugged on his tie, watching me carefully.

“It’s too late and Jin hyung said she was already asleep. He’ll drop her off in the morning. Just relax. Would you like a drink?”

I stared at him. 

What now? 

He looked nervous and a tad worried.

 Swallowing , I shook my head, turning on my heel.  

“I’m going to bed.” I was almost at the door to the nursery when he grabbed my arm, seemingly moving faster than I could breathe.

“Wait, Heejin… “ He stopped, worrying his lip between his teeth before sighing, “I… I need to say something..” He finished and I exhaled sharply.

I tugged on my arm but he wouldn’t let go.

“Jungkook , let me go.” I said sharply. “ I’m not in the mood tonight . You aren’t drunk now and I’m running out of reasons to excuse your actions.”

His hold on my arm relaxed but he didn’t let go.

“Namjoon hyung told me about that new therapist.... Kim Taehyung?? . I don’t think it’s a good idea.” He said roughly.  

I sighed, defeated. It was expected and yet it stung. I wondered if perhaps I was just beating a dead horse at this point. But Mina deserved to have a father who loved her with all his heart and Jungkook’s heart was so filled with grief it had no place for his daughter. If there was any chance I could help change that, I would take it.

I tugged my arm away again and this time he let go.

I tried to smile encouragingly. it was hard because i was all out of comfort, my own exhaustion too overwhelming at the moment.

So I took a deep breath and reached out to lightly touch his arm. 

“Listen, no one’s asking you to make a decision tonight, Jungkook.” I tried to smile a bit more widely but it probably came out as a grimace, “ Just sleep on it and think about why you think it isn’t a good idea. Taehyung’s an alpha and he may understand you better. Think about it and you can let Namjoon know later.”

He didn’t reply, merely staring at me till I began to feel a little hot around the collar.

“Well, Good night then.” I made to turn away but he grabbed me again, this time by my wrist.

“Wait.”

Patience wearing just a little thin, I stared at him, waiting as he requested.

“I’m sorry about what I said that night. At the party last week. About you not being her mother.   I shouldn’t have said that.”

It was the first time he had apologized for anything.

It took me a second to even remember what he was talking about. 

“Alright. I’m not mad. And I understand why you said it. Its fine. And you’re right. I’m not her mother and I should be more careful. ”

He nodded and then stepped back.

“ I’m sorry. For a lot of things. ”  He bowed awkwardly and I could only stare at him, shaking my head. The apologies were somehow both welcome and abhorrent to me. 

They were the kind of apology you would offer a stranger. And that made them insincere because I wasn’t a stranger. I’d been through too much these past few months, to be treated that way. 

For now I could only accept them at face value. 

“ Its alright. Just go to bed Jungkook. And listen to Namjoon oppa . I know you don’t trust me but you should trust him. He only wants what’s best for you. ”

I sounded twenty years older than I actually was and grimaced.

"There’s one more thing. Can I... I need... “ He stopped and stared at the floor. 

I felt a huge sense of foreboding rise up at that. 

“Are you going to pull the i paid for your body card? “ I said bitterly. “ You made it very clear that i can’t say no. I don’t see why you’re bothering to-”

“You can say no.” He said softly. “ You can say no.” 

And then he looked up at with limpid doe eyes, shining with all the stars in the galaxy and I wanted to sob at the unfairness of it all. 

“ And if I say no, where will you go? To a brothel? you’ll come back smelling like another beta or omega and you can’t come near your daughter till it fades. Which is what? A week? “ 

Jungkook didn’t say anything and I felt helpless. 

“Is that why you sent her away tonight?” I demanded and he looked genuinely surprised. 

“What? No. Of course not . i just...You looked exhausted. I thought you’d like a night off. And just... I don’t want to have sex. Can you just sleep with me. I just... I don’t want to be alone tonight.” 

“What’s so special about tonight?” i rolled my eyes already moving to his bedroom instead of the nursery. 

He stared at me for a few seconds, eyes empty in the dark of the hallway. 

I waited a whole minute before sighing. This was excruciating and my heels hurt from wearing heels all evening. i wanted to curl into the air mattress on the floor of the nursery , possibly lie sleepless till dawn and then drive down to pick Mina up from Jin’s place. 

“Jungkook , let’s just go to bed and forget-” 

“Its her birthday.” 

I barely heard him, his lips barely moved and his voice was so low. 

I stared at him. Not sure if I’d misheard. 

“What?”

“Its her birthday. “ He repeated. 

“You can say her name.” i said calmly. “ You’re not betraying her by saying her name out loud in front of me.” 

He went a little stiff at that and i wanted to kick myself for the remark. What a hypocrite I was. I’d reprimanded Namjoon for trying to dictate Jungkook’s grief and here I was , doing the exact same thing. 

“I’m sorry. God, Jungkook... I’m sorry. i shouldn’t have said that.  i didn’t know. Why didn’t you tell me.. I... of course you don’t have to be alone. Should i call Namjoon oppa? Or Jimin?” I asked gently. 

“It’s Sooah’s birthday.” He was still staring at the floor, apparently he hadn’t heard a word I’d said. 

I had a sudden flash of memory, remembering that Jungkook used to sing. He had sung at his wedding seven years ago. Serenaded his wife as she walked down the aisle. I had been young then but i remembered thinking how evident his love was in every syllable sung .

Something i could hear even now, in the way he said her name. 

“Okay. What would you like to do? I... I can make seaweed soup.” I said softly. “ We can go see her if you like?” 

He stared at me. 

“I want to go alone.” He said finally. 

I hesitated. 

“I’ll drive you. i’ll stay in the car. You can’t drive.” I reminded him. 

Jungkook’s driver’s license had been suspended after one too many traffic violations. I drove him around often . 

He didn’t reply, staring out of the huge bay windows and i sighed. 

“Alright... Why don’t you go change  into something more comfortable yeah? i’ll get the soup going and we, “ i bit my lips, “ , I’m sorry, And you can go see her.  “ I smiled, before moving to the kitchen and grabbing the dried seaweed. I soaked it in cold water, before getting the beef, garlic, soy sauce, salt and pepper and the sesame oil from the cupboards. 

Ten minutes later, the soup was boiling away and I peered out at the door leading to his bedroom. I was still wearing the cocktail gown and my head was beginning to throb. I oved to the nursery and stripped quickly, slipping on my white t shirt and a pair of pink corduroy shorts. 

I would be in the car anyway.  By the time i finished taking off all my make up, the soup was done and Jungkook was slumped over the counter. He looked drained, more so than usual . In fact he looked notably worse than how he was ten minutes ago. 

Torn between the urge to draw him into my arms and the helpless knowledge that he would absolutely hate me touching him , i merely hovered near the stove, pouring the stove into a small airtight container. 

On a whim I moved to the cupboard  in the corner that housed all the crockery and threw it open. 

“What was her favorite bowl?” I said casually, staring at him. 

He blinked, staring at me like i was speaking a foreign tongue. 

“Her favorite bowl , Jungkook The one she always drank or ate from?” 

He swallowed but leaned his palms down on the granite countertop, levering himself off the tall stool of the kitchen island and making his way over to me. I stepped back, giving him space to peer into the depths of the black marble shelves. 

He finally stuck a hand in and drew out a pale yellow and mauve bowl , a little worn but intact. 

He held it carefully, running his fingers gently over the bowl, savoring the surface his wife had once caressed with her own fingers. I watched as his lips curved, a pale pale imitation of a smile but a smile nonetheless and I felt my breath catch in my throat. 

This was probably the first time he’d smiled in the three months i’d known him. 

My heart began to pound, a steady staccato that began rising in volume and i willed myself to stay calm. 

“I..uh.. I can wash it for you.” I said softly .

The smile disappeared as quickly as it had come and he stared at my outstretched hand like it was a snake . 

Face almost eerily blank he cleared his throat. 

“I’ll do it.” 

i watched as he moved to wash the bowl under the spray from the faucet and finished clearing up the kitchen. i grabbed a small bag to keep the sea wood soup in and held the bag open when Jungkook finished washing the bowls. He grabbed a fresh kitchen towel and carefully wiped down the moisture before wrapping the bowl in the towel and keeping it inside the bag, carefully. 

I smiled and zipped the bag shut. 

“Lets go shall we?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

I sat waiting in the car, staring out into the darkness of the parking lot, while the rain poured torrents outside the glass windows of the car. I felt unaccountably alone, like I was the only human being left on the planet. 

It had been a little past an hour since Jungkook had disappeared into the building that held his wife’s ashes. I wasn’t sure if i should give him a call. Had he fallen asleep in there. 

I told myself I would wait another hour and if he didn’t come out, I would go check on him. 

I dozed lightly against the window, exhaustion beginning to creep in. I wanted to sob at how tired i was. I could have gotten a full nights sleep, something i hadn’t had since the day I took Mina into my arms. 

But then, i remembered the tiny smile that had sprung up on his face and i grinned despite myself. That was progress wasn’t it? It definitely was. I was sure that if only Jungkook could be convinced to go meet Taehyung , the alpha therapist, things could get so much better for him. I wanted to have him at least halfway to being ..... capable of handling his own daughter, before i left him. if not the worry alone would eat me alive. 

I was just getting ready to perhaps climb over the console and nap in the backseat when my phone rang. 

I glanced at the dashboard, frowning. it was two thirty in the morning. 

Who?

I grabbed my phone from the bag and my heart leapt to my throat. 

“Jin? What’s wrong? What happened to her?” I could feel my heart threatening to give out, any number of terrible possibilities running through my head in a vicious loop.

“nothing happened, Heejin , take a deep breath... She’s just running a fever. it was quite low earlier but its hitting 101  now and I’m getting a little worried. I’ve given her cold baths and kept a wet towel on her but it doesn’t seem to be coming down.” 

“We’ll be there in ten minutes! “ i said quickly.

“I’m sorry, Heejinah, i don’t have any experience with babies and-”

“it’s alright...thank you for calling me oppa!” i hung up , already fumbling with the door and stepping out into the rain. i was soaked through in three second flat. What a day to wear a white t shirt. 

I ran quickly, stumbling a little on the gravel pathway and hoping to God i was going the right way. I ran into the foyer, the poor security guard falling asleep over his desk glancing up at me in sympathy. 

“there was a man here earlier?”

“Second floor third room.” He said casually.

I nodded, already rushing for the steps. I climbed the four flights of stair in two minutes, my heart threatening to give out. I found Jungkook in the room , kneeling on the floor and he looked at me in shock that swiftly turned to anger.

“Jungkook-” i gasped because the run up had robbed me of my breath. 

“What the fuck are you doing here?” He moved so quickly I could barely blink before he was right up in front of me. 

“Jungkook, I... We need...” I tried to draw a breath in but before I could form the words he grabbed my arm, so hard that I whimpered in pain. 

“I told you i wanted to be alone, what the fuck is your fucking problem?!” He snarled.

“Jungkook-” Before i could finish, he yanked me just a bit closer to him before shoving me out of the room with his wife’s portraits and the small ornate vase that held her ashes. 

it wasn’t that hard. 

He didn’t push me in a very brutal way. 

In fact it was probably with lesser force than what anyone slamming a door would use. 

But,

Jungkook was six feet two. He weighed a 170 pounds. 

I was a hundred pounds wet and barely came up to his shoulders. 

And it was just my luck that the wall opposite to the door had a large concrete and granite horse figurine placed right in front of it.  

I crashed into the torso of the equine, my bones rattling inside me and I whimpered when my wrist made contact with the hard surface, bending a bit out of place. 

I slid to the floor in a wet lump, trying to catch my breath and process what had just happened.

Jungkook stood frozen by the door horrified as he stared at his hands, as thought he couldn’t quite fathom what he had just done. 

A sharp burning pain began in my sides and I gasped out.

“Oh, fuck.” I swore. 

Jungkook moved to help me up but i was already crawling away from him, scrambling to my feet, ignoring the ache in my side.

“I’m sorry.” I said softly, holding both my hands up. “ It’s Mina...she’s running a fever. We need to go get her.” 

“Heejin-ah, I’m...”

One more apology and i would officially lose it, i thought slightly hysterically. 

“its my fault.” I said sharply, “  I should have probably tried calling you from the car instead of barging in like this but Jin called and i got worried...I wasn’t thinking straight so I’m sorry about that... I think we should go get her as soon as we can.” 

“Did i hurt you?” He demanded , reaching out for me again and I nearly fell again trying to move away from his touch. 

“No.. No I’m fine.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Are you sure, we don’t have to go the doctor.?  “ He asked nervously, watching me carefully wipe down her body with the slightly damp wet cloth. I nodded, carefully squeezing the water out before dipping the towel in water again. 

“She’ll be fine. Her fever’s come down and with babies this young, its safer to care for them at home than to take them to a hospital.” I said casually, 

 “I wasn’t talking about her.” He said stiltedly. 

I blinked, staring up at him in surprise. 

“What?”

“I think we should go to the doctor. You fell hard. ”

“Jungkook what are you even on about?” I said crossly, steadfastly ignoring the pain in my sides. It was sharp and unbearable with every breath I took in but I was too terrified to go to the hospital and have them tell me I’d cracked my rib or something. 

Partly because that would be so inconvenient. 

Partly because Jungkook would probably go back to being a guilt ridden shadow of himself if that happened. 

“I’m going to call Yoongi hyung.” 

Before I could protests some more he was already on his feet, moving to the living room.

Yoongi arrived thirty minutes later , annoyed and sleepy, dressed in a soft white t shirt and stone wash jeans. 

“It’s four thirty in the morning , she better be dying Jungkook..” He rasped out near the front door and i flinched at the murderous tone to his voice. 

Suddenly , i hoped desperately that my ribs had cracked. 

Yoongi stepped in , staring at me . He took in the mess of quilts i sat on and sighed. 

“Come here and take your shirt off.” He said gruffly. 

I blinked, feeling blood rush to my face. Was he always this handsome? Hating the very unwelcome flutter of nerves, I moved to stand in front of him, grabbing the hem of my t shirt .

But the movement jolted my rib and pain sharp and lancing shot through my side. I yelped and dropped my hand again breathing harshly which only seemed to make things worse. 

I swallowed and Yoongi blinked, reaching out to gently grip my elbows. 

“Hey...relax ... “ He said gently. 

I felt the press of a warm chest at my back.

“Let me help hyung.” Jungkook’s voice rumbled through my body, his chin brushing the top of my head and he bent over me from the back, fingers gripping the hem of my shirt and carefully lifting it up to just above the curve of my breasts. 

Yoongi was staring at Jungkook over my shoulders expression unreadable. 

“So you do know how to act after all.” He commented drily and I heard Jungkook inhale sharply behind me. 

“Hyung...” He said sharply, and Yoongi merely rolled his eyes. 

“How did this happen?” He ran slender fingers all over my skin, feeling each dent and dip carefully. 

“I ..uh.. I sort of fell into a statue? It was made of concrete and quite heavy.” 

His face shifted into a frown. 

“Jungkook , tell me you didn’t push her.” He said sharply and I jumped a bit.

“No...he didn’t.” i said sharply and Yoongi ignored me , staring right at the alpha behind me. 

“I didn’t mean to.” He said finally.

“You broke her rib, kid.” 

I groaned in defeat. Behind me Jungkook stiffened.

“It was an accident.” I said sharply and Yoongi gave me an unimpressed look.

“If i had a won for every wife that told me that.” 

“It was my fault and-” I shut my mouth. I did sound like the poster child for abused wife in denial. 

“Relax... I’m not going to send your handsome husband to prison.” He chuckled. “ This time.” He added, giving Jungkook another glare. 

“It won’t happen again. ever. “ Jungkook’s voice shook a little. 

I sighed, already imagining the self flagellation that was probably going on inside the alpha’s head.

Yoongi’s voice drew me out of my head. 

 “Its not a break. It looks like a crack which is easier to heal. But i still want you to come in tomorrow. We’ll get it x rayed. Its going to take a couple of months to heal.” 

I gaped.

“Months?” 

“As long as you take it easy you’ll be fine. Now where’s the little one?” 

Yoongi dropped off a small bottle of pediatric paracetamol and told me to keep an eye on her temperature before bidding us goodbye. 

Once the door closed behind him, Jungkook turned to me , eyes wide and lips parted. 

“If you apologize , I’m going to throw this  at your face.” i said calmly, fingers closing over the neck of the ceramic vase on the table. 

Jungkook blinked. 

“I’m sorry. “ He said nonetheless and I sighed, pulling my hands away. 

How fitting. Neither of us could act out of character. 

Jungkook couldn’t stop blaming himself for everything under the sun. 

I just couldn’t bring myself to hurt him in any way. 

“Just go to bed , Jungkook. I’ll be fine.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Author’s Note : As always the pain is here and probably going to get worse. But Jungkook seems to be turning mildly human so let’s see if he can keep that up. Also handsome pediatric doctor Yoongi as second lead because i like to torture myself. 

If you want to be on the taglist please leave a comment!! 

@girlinthemikrokosmos  @xius-exos  @sugainfireslex  @yunkichiee

@kpopstudybee @ephyraaaa  @peachoney9795 @ggukkieland  

@veronawrites  @blr1004   @tinyhoagiepartylover @btsis7okay

@squishyjk  @itsdingdong @emmmui  @honeeybunneey  @yeonkiminnie

[plsimsuchasimp]

cheating.

part 2 here

Ft: Suna Rintarou x !gn reader, a little bit of atsumu miya x !gn reader

Genre/warnings: one (1) curse word, cheating, brief implied sex, angst, hurt/comfort, fighting

Wc: 1.8k

NOT PROOFREAD!

a/n: i’m so sorry for this angst but i had to do it for y’all... didn’t have it in me to write a happy ending, maybe later.

The rain was pouring down, clattering against the roof of the gym. You, sitting against the wall in a corner by the benches, watched Suna’s team play, smiling slightly at the way they seemed to seamlessly move together. Your boyfriend looked concentrated, green eyes flickering from one player to another. 

His phone buzzed beside you, and you picked it up, intending to set it to Do Not Disturb so you could do work, but the notification caught your eye. 

“Hey!” It read, “it was so good to meet you >;) you made me feel good <3″

Instantly, your heart drops into your stomach. Silently willing for the notification to disappear, your eyes cling to the screen as yet another popped up. “I miss you babe, we should do that again”

Your eyes begin to burn, trying to deny the obvious truth of what you saw in front of you. Suna Rintarou had cheated on you, and from the looks of it, with a stranger. You swallow, hard, as the lump in your throat grows and tears begin to form in your eyes. No wonder he’d been overly affectionate in the past week, he probably felt guilty.

What hurt most wasn’t that he didn’t tell you, pretended that everything was fine; no, it was the realization that you just weren’t enough for him. All the time you’d spent on him, everything you’d done, the words of confirmation and the countless amount of love and affection you’d given him, it all wasn’t good enough. 

You were bad enough for him to seek loving in a stranger’s arms.

Clicking the phone off, you put it down and stared into space for a moment, fighting the tears that threatened to spill onto your cheeks at any second. Practice was wrapping up, and you couldn’t face Suna right now. Luckily for you, he was on cleanup duty this week, so he had to stay late. 

Trying to shake the rigidity out of your limbs, you gathered your things and stuffed them into your bag, not taking the time to organize them so they all fit. Head down, you headed for the door, hoping that Suna wouldn’t look over. Opening the door, you were faced with another harsh realization: It was raining and Suna was supposed to drive you home. That wasn’t happening today, for sure. Glancing around, you spotted Atsumu pulling his umbrella out of his bag, and rushed over to him.

“Hey Atsumu,” you said, attempting to keep your voice steady, “Can I catch a ride with you?” He was going to ask why, when Suna had a perfectly good car, but then he caught a glimpse of the tear streaking silently down your face and decided it might be better to wait until later.

Unusually serious, he agreed and put a comforting hand on the small of your back as you two hurried out of the door under his umbrella. Opening his car door for you, he let you in and then went over to the driver’s side, sliding in and turning on the car so it would warm up. 

Stealing the occasional look at you, he noticed you were shaking and turned up the heat in the car although he was warm from volleyball practice. He started driving, sensing that you didn’t want to talk. Jaw clenched, he drove in silence for a couple minutes, then dared to speak.

“Hey, are you okay?” Hearing sniffles from your side of the car and seeing your shoulders shake, he pulled over to the side of the road and put the car in park. Gulping, he awkwardly reached out a hand to pat you on the back, but this only made you cry harder.

Looking up to face him, tear streaks staining your cheeks, you tried to stop shivering from shock. “S-Suna,” you mumbled, fighting to keep your voice from completely breaking, but another sob escaped before you could get anything more out.

“Wha’? Suna what?” he prodded, brow furrowing in concern. You rarely cried, so he knew this was something really serious.

“Suna c-cheated on me.” The last couple of words were whispered, your voice breaking, and Atsumu’s mouth dropped open. Of all the things he’d expected to hear, it wasn’t that. Your relationship with Suna had always seemed perfect. He’d seen the way Suna looked at you, his eyes soft, seen the way his behavior changed around you, seen his eyes light up whenever you smiled. This wasn’t possible.

He opened his mouth, shutting it again when words failed him. You were hunched in the passenger’s seat, shaking so hard he could hear your elbows accidentally hitting the car door. Without a second thought, he took his sweatshirt off and covered you with it, hoping that it would warm you up at least a little bit. 

“I- I’m so sorry,” he muttered, unsure how to comfort a clearly distraught you. As soon as your shudders subsided, his mind turned to Suna and what he would do next time he saw him. No doubt he deserved to be beat up for what he did to you, hurting you like that, but it just didn’t make sense. Suna was totally in love with you, and it was obvious to any outsider. 

He started the car again, one hand on the steering wheel and the other on your shoulder, trying to calm you down. “Y/N, I’m gonna drop ya off at home, okay?”

A quick nod from you reassured him, and you two drove with just the raindrops crashing down on the roof of the car. When you arrived at your house, you made a motion to give back his sweatshirt, but he just waved a hand and said “Don’t worry about it. Ya can return it to me when I next see ya.” Your lips trembled and you turned away from him, making the way to your door and letting yourself in. He didn’t leave until he saw that you were inside, then started driving back to the gym.

You shed your jacket and turned on the heater in your house, not bothering to turn on the lights or draw the curtains. Kicking your shoes off, you crawled into bed and under your blanket and let the tears come, hugging the pillow that smelled too much like Suna.

Meanwhile at the gym, Suna was just finishing up and wondering where you’d gone to. The guilt of his mistake still hung with him, and he was looking to take you out to dinner tonight and spend some more time with you. However, when he saw his phone laying faceup, the bold words in text still plainly on the screen, he knew that you’d found out, and his heart contracted. Sinking to his knees, he struggled to breathe through the upcoming panic. He was in love with you, and he had no idea what had possessed him to fall into someone else’s arms for the night.

The feeling surged when he remembered that one of your biggest fears/insecurities was not being good enough, and a short gasp fell out of his mouth as he realized just how much he’d messed up. The gym door swung open, banging against the wall with the sheer force of the push. There stood Miya Atsumu, a murderous expression on his face.

“Suna!” He barked, and the middle blocker glanced up briefly before returning his attention to the phone clutched in his hands, frantically pressing the call button as it once again went straight to voicemail. The sound of your voice was almost too much for him to bear, his breathing accelerating and his head pounding. 

y/n please pick up please i’m so sorry i swear i didn’t mean it they mean nothing to me i love you i love you so much please don’t leave me

His fingers speed across the keyboard, hoping against hope that you’ll talk to him. Any sort of contact. The phone is suddenly knocked from his hand by Atsumu, the look on his face nothing short of furious. 

“What the fuck were ya thinking?” He spits, rage evident in the bulging veins of his neck. “You hurt y/n so badly that they had to drive home with me rather than face another second of ya.”

His words stung Suna, because they both knew they were true. He doesn’t resist when Atsumu pulls him to his feet, glaring at him and shoving him towards the wall. 

“You’re pathetic. Y/N is the best person ya will ever meet, and ya ruined it all.” Once again, Suna doesn’t reciprocate, his eyes falling miserably to the ground. Atsumu’s fist comes up and hits Suna straight in the stomach, forcing the breath out of his lungs as he collapses to the floor. Atsumu looks at him with an expression of pure disgust, walking away to leave Suna where he is, slumped against the wall.

His eyes are dull, the life drained out of them, because he knows Atsumu is right. A notification causes his phone to buzz and he picks it up immediately, hoping to see anything from you, but it’s just another text from the fling. Hatred for himself and the person fills him, and he slams his phone down, allowing his head to sink into his knees. 

He needs to see you, so he grabs his stuff and rushes to his car, barely remembering to lock the gym on his way out. Going ten miles above the speed limit, he makes it to your house ten minutes after you had. 

Walking up to your front door, he knocks urgently, over and over again. He hears shuffling from behind, and the door opens to reveal you in an oversize sweatshirt that doesn’t belong to him and sweatpants, eyes red and puffy from crying. 

The instant you see him, time seems to stop. The hurt is written all over your face, and the regret all over his. He can’t seem to move, can’t do anything besides whisper your name.

“Y/N.” 

You shake your head, new tears forming in the corners of your eyes, and turn away. “I don’t want to talk to you, Suna.” 

With those words, his heart shatters a little bit more. He was your Rin, your Rinnie, never Suna. “Please-” the door slams in his face and he hears the lock turning, signaling the final goodbye. He screams, pounding on your door as the panic overtakes him. 

“Please! I love you! I’m so sorry, just please don’t leave me! I’ll go insane if you do!” Tears stream down his face and yours, mourning each other on opposite sides of the door. His words wrack you, tempt you to open the door and forgive him, but you can’t. He already showed you he didn’t care.

Half an hour passes, with the yells from the door fading into whimpers. Finally, you hear a car door slam, and you allow yourself to sob, held immobile on the floor. 

You’re broken, and it’s his fault. His head falls onto the steering wheel, not caring that it sets off the car horn.

Still, the rain patters on the roof, both of you less than three hundred feet apart, but forever separated.

He’ll never love anyone like he loved you.

[sky-berrie]

Stitch - Damian

Summary: Another favorite trope - reader patches up a wound. Warning: mentions of blood. 

The window opened behind you and you felt a cool summer night breeze brush against your neck. You didn’t bother to give the intruder any attention because you knew that Damian was the only person who could disarm the alarm and crack lock mechanism with ease. You thought the whole system was overkill but it pleased Damian to have it installed so you didn’t complain.

“Hey, Damian,” you greeted him robotically with your gaze still transfixed to your laptop screen and your back to the window. You were watching the events of the latest episode of your favorite show unfold.

You heard Damian land in your room with a grunt. He was usually quite graceful, however you guessed that his ribs and hip were still sore from the last sparing session he had with his brothers and sisters. That family took everything to a whole other level.

You heard Damian shut the window after himself. The sound of the latch being secured came next. Then you heard electronic beeps as he reactivated the alarm. “You –” he let out a sharp exhale. “You took home economics, right?”

“Yeah,” you replied, nonchalantly with a mouthful of popcorn. You didn’t take your eyes off the screen, but you heard the sound of his heavy boots carry him across your room.

“Good,” he said. A shaky breath infiltrated his normally self-assured voice. “And you remember most of it?” The bed springs creaked under his weight.

“Uh, yeah, I guess so.”

“Great,” he said. “What grade did you receive?” This wasn’t all that out of character for him. Damian was competitive in all aspects of his life. You wouldn’t be surprised if he wanted to compare home economics grades just so he could vaunt his skills.

“I don’t know, Damian,” you said honestly. You turned up the volume, hoping that Damian would get the hint that you wanted to watch your show in peace and quiet. “I think it was a good mark.”

Damian let out a heavy sigh of relief. “Excellent.” His voice sounded less troubled than before.

“Jon did most of my assignments,” you admitted unapologetically.

Damian was quiet for a moment. “Okay, but you attended the classes, correct?”

You didn’t answer right away. You were too focused on the climax of the episode. “Oh my goodness,” you muttered under your breath to yourself as the plot twist unveiled. “Um,” you said, remembering that Damian had asked you something. “Yeah, yeah, more or less.”

“Do you remember how to sew?”

“Sort of,” you told him. You had sewn on a button once. It didn’t look great, but it definitely wasn’t going anywhere.

“Well enough,” he said. “I need you to suture a laceration.”

“What?” you choked out. He said it so nonchalantly that you weren’t sure if he was serious or not, because a sane person would not be so stoic. You whipped around to find Damian lying on your bed in his Robin uniform. It was soiled with a layer of black, like he had been charred. It was so dark that it masked the staining of his blood and you wouldn’t have known he was bleeding if it weren’t for the pool of red soaking through your white comforter. He was holding his side with his hands at an awkward angle.

You had seen him with cuts and bruises and even broken bones, but never with the life bleeding out of him. “Oh my goodness!” you shrieked as panic filled your lungs. Your face contorted into a horrified grimace as you tried to stifle an expression of disgust. The strong stench of metal made your stomach churn and your head woozy.

You immediately felt horrible for not paying attention to him sooner. “Damian, why didn’t you say something? Holy crap! What the hell happened? You need an ambulance!” You turned around to reach for your phone.

“No,” Damian choked out. “Secret… identity,” he said with his eyes squeezed shut.

“What about your brothers and sisters? Your dad? Alfred?”

“On their way. No time to wait. First aid kit,” he implored weakly.

You ran for the bathroom and tore into the cabinet to find the massive first aid kit that Damian insisted you store. You had opened it once or twice to grab a bandage for a paper cut but you never touched the majority of the contents. You didn’t even know what half of the kit was for. You guessed that you might find out today.

When you returned to your room, Damian was moving slowly to unbutton his uniform. You helped him with the rest, trying to do it quickly without jostling anything. You tried to ignore the squishy wetness of the uniform, but your hands came away covered in a layer of crimson blood. Beneath the outer coat, his white undershirt was seeping with blood. There was a large tear in the fabric and a bit of the raw wound peeked through.  

You didn’t have a fear of blood, really. You had no qualms about donating blood or seeing it on TV. This, however, was completely different. You were more terrified than you had ever been in your entire life. You had no idea what to do - everything you knew about CPR and standard first aid had inexplicably disappeared from your brain. Silent tears began to spill from your eyes as your breaths tore in and out of your throat, ragged and shallow.

“Y/N,” said Damian, firmly. Through your blurry, wet vision, you could see him straining to make eye contact with you. “Breathe. Everything is going to be fine. Just follow my instructions.”

Normally you trusted Damian, but this time his reassuring words didn’t have any kind of soothing effect on you. Your whole body was shaking now. You couldn’t find your voice. Instead, you shook your head.

“Yes, Y/N. It is going to be fine, but you must listen to me. Do you understand?”

You tried to take a deep breath, but an uncontrollable sob cut it short. If Damian could lie there halfway to death and still be composed, then you could at least pretend to be calm for his sake. You nodded your head this time, trying your best to even out your breathing. It was no use though. You couldn’t remember how to breathe.

“Thank you. Cut it,” he said, motioning to his undershirt.

You did as he ordered and cut a line right down the centre of his shirt. It was warm and wet and clung to his skin, so you peeled it off to reveal the full extent of a nasty looking wound. Even through your distorted, teary vision, you saw enough to know it was not good.

You felt faint at the sight of his insides. Or maybe it was your hyperventilating making you dizzy.  

“Breathe, Y/N. Breathe and then get the sterile solution to irrigate it.”

You returned with freshly washed hands, a pair of gloves and a jug of irrigation solution. Following his instructions, you squeezed the syringe and expelled the liquid over his wound. It ran down his side and carried even more blood into your comforter.

“Okay,” he breathed out. “There should be a small white packet with a curved need and thread and a pair of suture holders. They look like scissors but without the blades.”

Your trembling hands had a difficult time picking out the items. Once you collected the materials, you looked at Damian for further directions.

“It’s a bit deep so you’ll need to close the layer under the skin first. Can you see it?”

You shook your head. His side was a giant red mess. You couldn’t make out anything except for blood and jagged skin. It was nothing like the clean and clear-cut diagrams you’d seen in class. “This is crazy! I can’t do this,” you cried. People spent years studying and training to do procedures like this. Stitching up a body was not something that a person should wing, and definitely not on their best friend, lying in an unsterile room.

“You can,” he assured you. “Pretend like you’re sewing some fabric. Start with this layer here.” Damian pulled at his skin and pointed to the inside with a pair of suture forceps. You couldn’t help but turn away and shut your eyes as he prodded himself. “Y/N,” he called your attention back. “Make sure the needle goes in like this and comes out like this,” said Damian as he demonstrated.

You were shaking your head. “You are absolutely insane! Sewing fabric is nothing like sewing a wound! Can’t we just wait for your dad or someone?”

“No time,” he said.

“Please, Damian,” you begged. “Let me call EMS.”

“No,” he asserted with what little strength he had.

“Please! I…”

“No,” he repeated. You could tell his patience was wearing thin.

“I understand you have to protect your secret identity, but Damian, come on. There won’t be an identity to protect if you die.”

“Batman…Nightwing…” he said weakly.

“They’ll understand!” you argued with desperation.

“No,” he mumbled. He shook his head.

Without any thought, your next words came flooding out straight from your heart. “Damian, I love you and I don’t want you to die!” Oh. That came as a shock to you. You’d never said anything like that before. In fact, you’d never even had a thought like that, but you knew it was the truth. Your hands almost flew to cover your mouth in regret, but the blood dripping from your hands stopped you.

Damian didn’t seem to notice your confession, or if he did, he didn’t acknowledge it. Had you not been utterly distracted by the emergency before you, you might have run away with embarrassment from your sudden proclamation.

“Please try for me, okay?” His eyes were starting to close, but you could see him struggle to keep them open.

You searched his eyes, to see that his once vibrant green eyes had a dull, hazy colour to them. Seeming to find what you were looking for, you conceded. You swallowed a lump in your throat. “Okay.”

It was the worst experience of your life. Damian walked you through the process, but nothing could prepare you for the nauseating feeling of piercing his skin and pulling the nylon thread through the thickness of the tissue. Seeing the inside of his body made you want to vomit but his life was at stake, and you had to be brave for him. Besides, he was the one who should be worried, not you. Your technique was obviously non-existent and you were certain that you were hurting him a hell of a lot more than he was letting on. He hissed and groaned and you apologized profusely but he insisted that you continue.

“Thank you,” said Damian after you tied the last knot. His eyes were heavy and lidded and you could tell he was barely hanging on to consciousness. “Knew you could do it.”

You had no response. Now that the worst part was over, the adrenaline had left your system and you were in shock. His hand lolled out in an attempt to offer you comfort, or maybe to seek comfort for himself. You weren’t certain which is was, but nevertheless, you instinctively clasped his hand in yours.

Then he said something that caught you off guard. His voice was so faint that you barely heard him. “For the record, I love you, as well.”

You weren’t sure if he really meant it. Maybe he was delirious. He did lose a lot of blood. You pondered it for a moment and wondered if you should feel mortally embarrassed when he was fully lucid, but just then, a gentle squeeze on your hand told you that you didn’t have to worry.

[ragingbookdragon]

And I Will Still Be Here Stargazing PT. 2

A Batsis x Batfamily Story!

Word Count: 1.4K Warnings: Explicit Language, Mentions of Past Assault

Author's Note: Gotta start it slow and get into it! Hope y'all are enjoying so far! -Thorne

**********************************************************************

You’ve been missing for an entire week.

That entire statement had her ushered into a side room of GCPD while Gordon called her family, and all she could to was let the officers poke and prod at her whilst asking her questions about what happened to her all week. Expect she had no idea how to respond. She hadn’t been missing for a week, at least that’s what she believed.

When the officer checking her out showed her their phone, she was flabbergasted at the fact that sure enough, an entire week had passed between that night and now. She couldn’t wrap her head around it and she could tell some of the officers were getting annoyed with her lack of explanation.

“Probably out getting bent in a high riser all week. We should test her for cocaine and ecstasy.”

Her head shot up and she glowered at the two officers snickering just outside the door. “I wasn’t doing drugs, you assholes.” They stopped laughing and gaped at her, and suddenly she realized that she’d heard their whispering from that far. Her cheeks warmed and she looked back down to avoid their stares.

“Miss (Y/N), we should get you to the hospital to do a rape kit.”

She glanced at the officer beside her. “I wasn’t assaulted, ma’am.”

“You never know,” she explained. “It’s always better to be safe than—”

(Y/N) reached out and put her hand on her arm. “I wasn’t assaulted. I don’t know what—” something flashed across her mind, a memory, or a nightmare rather, the same officer before her, drowsy and helpless, locked in a room with a coworker. She yanked her hand away, understanding why; swallowing thickly, she murmured, “I’m fine. I just need to talk to my family.”

“Are you sure?” the officer asked, concern evident all over her face. “There’s no shame in asking for help.”

“Yeah, I’m fi—”

“(Y/N)!”

She looked up, seeing her family running towards her; (Y/N) was on her feet in seconds, colliding with her dad, arms wrapping around his waist as he placed one on the back of her head, holding her close. Her brothers and sister crowded around her, all holding tight to their missing sister.

“Oh, sweetheart,” he whispered harshly, unshed tears in his voice. “We’ve been so worried about you.”

Tears gathered in her eyes at the fear in his voice and she swallowed thickly. “I don’t know what’s going on, dad. I’ve been missing for a week?”

“You don’t remember?” Dick questioned lowly in her ear so no one could hear, and she shook her head.

“No. All I remember is seeing the comet that night and then…I was waking up the next morning.” She turned her head so she could see her eldest brother’s face. “A week has apparently passed but I don’t know how.”

Bruce hummed, pulling away from her and he took her face in his hands, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “We’ll talk about it at home,” he assured and stood back, glancing at Gordon. “Thank you for finding her, Commissioner.”

Gordon huffed and ran a hand through his hair. “We didn’t. She found us.”

(Y/N) smiled awkwardly. “Am I free to go home, Commissioner Gordon?”

“You were never not allowed, Miss (Y/N).” He stepped close and rested a hand on her shoulder as he murmured, “But I do think you should go to the hospital.”

“But I’m not—”

“We’ll have Doctor Leslie come to the manor for a personal check up.” Bruce interrupted and she internally thanked her father.

“Of course, Mister Wayne.” Gordon said. “Drive safely.”

Bruce rested his hand on her shoulders and ushered her out of the building and into the car.

***

What was she missing? Obviously, the entire week between then and now, but God, what was it? What had happened between then and now? Had she slept through an entire week? It wasn’t possible. Her family would’ve found her and brought her back. So, what really happened to her? Maybe she had been abducted or something? But her dad would’ve known the second something had entered Gotham. He always did. So, what—

“(Y/N).”

The firm call of her name shook her from her thoughts and she jerked up, looking at the rear-view mirror and into her dad’s eyes. “Yes sir?”

“We’re home.”

(Y/N) took a moment to gaze at her surroundings, and sure enough, the car was parked in the garage. It was just her and him, so the others must’ve gone inside. “Oh…I guess we are.”

“Come up here a minute.” He said and she crawled into the front seat, resting back against the cushions, eyes directed to the wall before her. “Are you alright? And I mean really alright?”

She didn’t even know at that point; she was so stunned trying to process everything, and she gestured vaguely. “I don’t know, dad.” (Y/N) glanced at him. “I’m not lying to you when I say that I have no idea what happened.”

“What do you remember?” he asked, eyes narrowed in that way that told her he was calculating every word for every scenario possible; that it wasn’t her dad looking for answers, but Batman instead. When she opened her mouth, nothing came out and he reached over, placing a hand over hers, squeezing tightly. “Close your eyes. Start from the very beginning. From the last thing you remember to now.”

(Y/N) nodded and took a deep breath, shutting her eyes. “I remember Alfred dropping me off in the field around seven. The sun was still out, and I had enough time to set up the telescope on the tripod.”

“Keep going. You’re doing good. What did it smell and sound like around you?”

She made a face. “Like a farm. But fresher air. I could hear the cicadas and crickets around. The occasional tractor equipment.” (Y/N)’s eyes shifted beneath her eyelids. “I got bored waiting, so I got on my phone until the sun went down. When the stars came out, I went between looking at the sky through the scope and out of it.”

“Then I called you. Do you remember that?”

“I do,” she nodded. “I talked to you and then I saw the comet.” That’s when things started to fall apart, and she shook her head. “I remember pulling away from the lens but then…the next thing I remember is coming to in the field.” (Y/N) opened her eyes and gazed at her hands. “I must’ve fallen asleep, but I don’t remember getting into my sleeping bag. And I certainly don’t remember sleeping for a week straight.”

Bruce merely stared at her, sighing, “We’ll give it time. Maybe something will come to you the longer you’re awake.”

She shrugged and reached for the door-handle, but when she grabbed it, it curled under her grip, and she froze.

“What was that?” he questioned, and her eyes went wide as she hurriedly bent the handle back.

“Nothing!” (Y/N) clambered out of the car and didn’t even close the car door behind her, running up the steps and into the kitchen where she was met by her siblings who pulled her into another hug that she was helpless to escape from. And she was fairly sure that Dick was sobbing on her shoulder.

***

Leslie frowned at the young woman across the room, gesturing for Bruce to follow her into the kitchen. “You’re not going to like the news.”

“What happened?”

She shook her head. “Nothing. Blood and urinalysis are both clean. So is the assault kit.” Leslie stared at him. “It’s almost like she really slept for an entire week.”

“It’s not possible,” Bruce argued. “We scoured that field and all of Gotham with help from every superhero alive.” He sighed. “Something happened to her. She dropped completely off the grid and suddenly reappeared back on.”

Leslie shrugged. “I don’t know what to tell you, Bruce. I don’t have an explanation for this. She’s healthy as a horse.” She placed a hand on his arm. “But if anything changes, give me a call and I’ll come back.”

He nodded, seeing her out. “Thank you, Leslie.” Bruce closed the door and wandered back into the living room, and though he felt such an inner turmoil over his daughter, the sight of her asleep and sandwiched between all her siblings, being protected by them, made him smile.