#and now I need to reorganize and edit it because it didn’t play out very smoothly in class

[betterhomesandhozie]

in a hell of my own creation lol

[ladyazulina]

Azu is Talking - Quickly Passing By

I can’t believe how busy I have been this week.

After the first post that started all this, I found it easier for my mental health that, instead of sitting down on Sunday to write all this recap, having to go through my calendars to try to remember what I did, how, and when, I would just slip a little daily update if my schedule lets me. Not even religiously daily, every two days also have worked.

It didn’t this week.

I was finally able to sit down to do something of the like without feeling rushed or breathless for the first time on Thursday. Almost the whole week passed already. And that annoyed me and overwhelmed me in equal parts.

You may not understand. I’m not used to being busy. Having to cancel stuff or reschedule or just right away forgetting something that was on my mind but not on my task list yet is a new experience. Until really recently, I spent most of my time idling by, roleplaying, or waiting for my turn to roleplay. Even before my life drastically changed, I was just starting to feel the need for more time to do my stuff, but not in this way.

Thematically categorizing my days is really doing things…

There is something I don’t like about it though. If I miss one day for whatever reason, I will have to wait until the next week to continue. Yeah, that may help me to organize myself, locate what is priority, and how to plan the way to tackle it, but it slightly annoys me. When I have power outages, for example, which happened A LOT this week alone.

There’s nothing I can realistically do about that, I’m aware of it, but it doesn’t make it less bothersome.

Also, just until now I have been religiously tackling my thematic tasks first, even though I may have tasks outside of it that are more… priority, like my [REDACTED] adventure and the editing projects I’m into. So far I have been starting the day with one small part to edit those projects, passing then to the thematic tasks, but once the dynamic fell through one day, I just continued with my previous order by inertia. And the power outages are a great help to throw me out of my carefully crafted routine.

I started the week great, for once, still volunteering at Actual Plays and charity events because it feels good, hoping to be able to participate in future opportunities. I also took some space last week to reorganize stuff on my Tumblr; you can take a look if you’re interested, I’ll do my best to keep it up to date.

I’ve been making swift progress with the ARC I’m currently reading, for small times, which is unlike me, I used to read a minimum of an hour, but I’m trying to not turn that precious reading moment into a chore. It has been fun, even though I’m slightly sad I haven’t felt great enough to write down my thought process during the reading; it’s something I have been wanting to implement for my Patreon, but that is something that could turn reading into a chore pretty quickly…

So, on Creative Monday, it took me some time to settle back into my game, but I did not continue with what I’m missing to end it. I’m still half-stuck, and blank, and not completely sure about how I will go through it, but in the meantime, I’m creating the lore around the game (really important, at least to me). In the amount of time I didn’t have power during a power outage on Tuesday, I satisfied the urgent need to draw a map. It’s the very second I have made so far, so I’m not that good at it, but I’m interested in learning. After deciding all my stories will share the same universe (the Azuverse 💙✨), my subconscious has been hard at work. The map is from the game age (some way back in the past), so I still have to ponder what it looks like in the present time of my novels, but details of those appeared during the drawing session. I was heavily creative during a big part of Tuesday, which is an example of states not being closely tied to their thematic days. I mean, of course.

On Review Tuesday, after easing out of the creative state, I went right to work.

Read last week’s review, Upon a Waking Dream.

In between posting last week’s and this week’s reviews, I scheduled a Linney’s campaign post. I wanted to do this twice to be a full month ahead but, to start with, I ended pretty late and was growing pretty fed up and done with things.

There’s nothing like getting angsty to spice things up.

The power outage and the unplanned creative session threw me out of my flow, so everything else was a bit uncomfortable. I was glad and grateful enough that I got myself “up to date” with the reviews—not that there is someone else but me pressuring me this way. I could have kept it only one per week, real-life stuff will always happen and interrupt and not because of that I have to drag myself through the floor…

Read this week’s review, A Rival Most Vial.

But… I guess I wanted to show myself something, I don’t know. I have to learn to be flexible enough with myself as well. Nothing is set in stone. If there is something that can’t happen for any reason, I should be able to reschedule it, move it to another day, or just right away take it down until the next week, without the added weight of also having to accomplish that next week’s task.

I’m still learning. Every day is a new lesson.

Iron Valley, Linney's Campaign, is being live every Tuesday.

I’m about to finish scheduling everything I have on Linney’s campaign and soon will start putting into the schedule my personal campaign on Iron Valley. The first day with Linney is not finished yet, and I may or may not be up to continue playing there, it’s something to look at later on. I would love to just because of Chase—have you met him yet?

On Working Wednesday, I had an Outside World Adventure ✨ (I should get back to those…) I mean, I already let you know I’m trying to get my passport, so I had to go out in an attempt to convince my sister with food to go put the money in her bank account ‘cause I still don’t have one so I can pay for the passport procedure. And we did it! I’m still fighting to get the photos done, something I thought I had but they (the site’s staff) aren’t satisfied with the ones I had at ready, so I need new photos. This has brought me so much stress and anger, I barely recognize myself (a lot of family drama and issues as well with which I will probably bore you some other week).

I did work on my thematic task: translating the second workshop. That was everything I was able to do, tired and mentally exhausted, so I’m expecting to be able to upload the workshops for real this time next week. I will be opening Patreon tiers that will work as groups for one-on-one writing coaching, to accompany you during your writing process. It will be fun, but I’m still thinking if the slots should be fewer than I thought at first, so I can get accustomed to it without getting overwhelmed, and expect to increase them with time. More on this next week, hopefully 🤞🏼

Also, with my partner, we started taking ASL classes. I’ve been trying to learn for years, but without someone to practice with, it’s hard to keep the knowledge. Due to my hearing loss, and some other stuff, I’m really interested, to the point of turning ASL into my main language. A long way to go, but I have to start somewhere, and we just did! So exciting! (This one is a very widely known sign, do you know what it means? 🤟🏼)

On Backstage Thursday, I spent a lot of time going back and forth with the passport site’s staff, but I reached a compromise. After getting mad like three times in a row (just when I got to relax, something –or someone– threw me back into the anger fit again… there was no respite). If I don’t get the new photos on Monday, taking advantage I have to go out for college, I should be exclusively going to a studio on Tuesday—of course, all that if my partner doesn’t convince me to try his method today, he’s keener to finish with this than me. I would have tried it earlier if I hadn’t been that mad. I need to get out of that headspace without it backfiring each time I think about it to be able to progress on it. I needed to take it out of my mind for a few days.

The power outage that day was less felt because I needed to cool down, which was easier to do offline. However, when it was back, and after the fourth anger fit, I went to work on my task. I wanted to do more stuff (get into the [REDACTED] adventure for once, not much time left and still lots to do), but time hasn’t been on my side. The power neither. I believe that with a little bit of priority organization, my current routine will be a blast. I just need to reel myself in. Yeah, easy. Peachy.

Secret Friday, though, was… a weird day. For a great part of it, I felt like I was drowning without a clear reason as to why. I’m grateful I have people I can talk with about whatever, but the timing wasn’t right—they were all busy with something or in such a good mood for me to bring them down. I know my people would rather know than be kept in the dark while I’m suffering, but I couldn’t bring myself to talk about it, so I drowned for a while.

Working on the secret stuff was hard ‘cause it’s an emotional activity and I was definitely in the wrong mood. I didn’t want to ruin it because of it but, at the same time, I didn’t want to miss it. Not much time is left for both finishing that particular thing and the day in question, it wasn’t the time to skip it. But neither was the correct feeling.

I got to topple it over, fortunately. I finished this week’s section feeling somewhat satisfied (I can always –and I will– check it out next week to confirm it), and when people went back into my orbit, I wasn’t so mood-driven. (Things are still bothering me, though, but I can’t say what it was that upset me, as if I don’t know how to even phrase it to start with. So I don’t feel like I can even talk about it… yet? Anymore? I guess I will see.)

I hurt myself during the coffee break though, which wasn’t fun. I’m wearing a burnt mark in a sensible and uncomfortable place (my breast, don’t- don’t ask about it) and the only thing I can do is just deal with it. I swear I’m trying to be careful, but stuff just goes out of hand. I’m not a particularly lucky girl anyway. But, after spending a small amount of time with my partner, I got to progress something with the [REDACTED] adventure.

I still have a way to go, but the word count is looking good. I’m not confident I will reach it with everything I had before, but I still haven’t finished accommodating things to even throw an estimate. It’s sounding nice and smooth, which is the goal, so I’m content with the small progress.

(I’m more than content with the sweet time I shared with my partner right before going to sleep—the sort of stuff I want to follow more often, not only with my partner but also with everyone else I love.)

Playful Saturday was playful but not in the way I had expected. As the week went by with less time to juggle extra things, I couldn’t find a space to write to the solo game’s creator and let them know my (excited) thoughts. This day was the day for it, but it went by as the usual weekends used to go.

I didn’t even get to read in the morning, less so do a small edit. I spent time with my partner though, and my lovely friends. I went to sit next to my mom for a while, and occasionally do chores. I wrote something that sparked out of nowhere about one of my novel projects and spent some time musing and worldbuilding. Before I was able to notice, it was already getting dark and I hadn’t started any of the day’s tasks.

There is not much use in crying over spilled milk. I guess I needed the breaks more than I could comprehend. So I took them without fighting. I’m a firm believer that everything falls into place as time goes by and that if something doesn’t feel like fitting it’s because that is not its place yet. It’s hard to know where it goes then, but you shouldn’t have to fight that much for it. It just fits like a puzzle piece. So I’m not fighting. I still have the tasks in the schedule, getting to them it’s just a matter of time.

[writerfangirlbooks]

Bobby’s Daughter Part 2

Prompt: Imagine flirting with Dean Winchester before he finds out you're Bobby Singer's daughter Part II: Imagine flirting and taking things to the next level with Dean before finding out one another's identity at Bobby's birthday party 

A/N: Or something like that! Hahaha. I'm back in college now for the next few months. I've got this story plot lined up and ready for action so be prepared for mostly Dean and Bobby's daughter for a while, but I'm still open for requests. I have some that keep getting lost that I continue to search for. Hope you are doing well! Long live Supernatural!  Word Count: 2200ish

Credit to gif owner!

Not enough hours later, you woke up.

An arm draped over your stomach sent all of last night's memories flooding back, explaining a few new certain aches and pains. You felt the need to roll over and stretch though it seemed your body was snug where you lay and prevented any movement. That didn't stop the man next to you, however. Dean must have sensed you shift because his hand moved lower down. You watched him go through the phases of waking from a hookup. First is the unknown, a sense of calm before trying to decipher your surroundings. Next was replaying the night's events. Lastly could be one of two things. Either an additional hookup or try to find yourself a less than an awkward excuse to leave.

Another hour later, you were leaving the shower and heard Dean call out with regret twinging in his voice. "Hey, sweetheart, I got a call and have to head out. I left my number on the desk." His voice trailed off as you stepped into the bedroom, the towel stuck to your drying skin. His eyes trailed your body, a light blush on his cheeks as remnants from the late night and early morning. Dean's voice was noticeably more hoarse when he spoke again after clearing his throat. "Well, I sure would enjoy seeing you again..."

"As you said, I have your number. I've got plans for the next couple of days, but we'll see if fate brings us to the same place and time once more," you said. You gave him a reassuring smile and a wink before walking to the closet for some clothes. Dean chuckled and he moved to be next to you. He drew you in for a deep kiss. The two of you parted once a car horn honked from outside. The ghost of the kiss hovered at your lips as his warmth left.

That was probably the best and strangest one-night stand you've ever had. Whether or not the phone number was for another hookup or a real date, you were inclined to call. You peeked out the window and saw Dean getting in the passenger's side of the car you were introduced to last night. You smiled to yourself as you got dressed, focusing on the events for the next few days. You grabbed one of your favorite travel shirts and baseball caps, a look your dad favored. Doing busywork was sure to get your mindset back on track.

You drove to the grocery store and mindlessly strolled down the aisles, adding veggies and meats to your basket. You grabbed a couple of birthday pies, a card, and a couple of gifts. You saw the local sheriff, Jodi Mills, and felt a pang of empathy. She had recently lost her family. She was on the phone as she walked to the back of the store. You made sure to add some beer and margarita mix to the cart before heading to the checkout. Once you had it ready, you figured mid-afternoon would be the best time for the surprise and headed to his house, parking in the back near the garage. You grabbed the bags and keys to get inside the house.

Inside the house was quiet except an old western movie playing on the television. You set the bags down with a thud on the kitchen table and heard a holler. "What in-" Your dad's voice rang out. You laughed quietly before raising your voice, alerting him to your presence.

"It's me!" You yelled with a laugh. Bobby huffed and took his hat off before placing it back again, though he was smiling. He dropped his shotgun, setting it against the doorframe. The pair of you embraced quickly and happily. "How are you doing, old man?"

"Well, I'm still kicking, so there's that. Glad to see you," he said. "What are you going here? Not that I'm complaining." Bobby walked over and saw the beer box, eagerly grabbing it and setting it in the fridge. You began to take out the foods and place them along on the countertop, re-energized.

"Your birthday is coming up, so I figured I would hang around for a while, spend some time with you," you told him. You hiked the collar of your jacket up in order to hide the red spots on your shoulder and collarbone. Your dad began to help you, mostly focused on the desserts. You grabbed the bag that had his gift, patted him on the back, and skipped off to one of the rooms to hide it. When you returned, the veggies were already in a bowl and the stove was on.

"How nice of you to clear your very busy schedule to hang out with this ol' man," he remarked sarcastically. You heard a car pull up to the front yard and beep. You turned curiously towards your dad.

"You know I always have time for you. Funnily enough, I think there's a case nearby. Who's out front?" You asked, trying to see past the window curtains. Bobby glanced around but didn't seem surprised.

"Did you find somewhere to stay or are you wanting to stay here? You know I'm always happy to have you. And out there? It's just some kid hunters I help on cases, they spend lots of time here. Surprised you all haven't been here at the same time before. Would you go get the spatulas from upstairs and the oldest edition of the vampire encyclopedia from the bookshelf in your old room?" Bobby questioned.

You let out a scoff of a laugh. "Sure thing. Glad I bought extras!" You went to your room first and spent some time searching for the book. It appeared the room had been reorganized quite a few times over the past decade. You gazed around, noticing your first hunting knife, and even some of your report cards. You could tell you weren't the last one to sleep in this bed, however. You could hear footsteps enter the house and two voices call for Bobby, the deepness causing you to realize they weren't actually kid hunters, which were teens usually on the run looking for fights. Once you finally found the book, you headed upstairs in search of the spatulas. There were way too many random boxes and shelves to search through. You wondered why there weren't any in the kitchen already.

Surprisingly, you could smell the food cooking downstairs and it made you realize how much time you had spent searching. Another fifteen minutes later, you doubted the spatulas would be of much use if the food was nearly ready. You moved back to the top of the stairwell and could hear the conversation. At first, a voice you didn't recognize sped adamantly through their findings. Bobby interrupted, focusing on the subject of food, and asked the other to let find his daughter and let you know that dinner was almost ready. The lower voice obliged and you could hear him heading your way. Your hair fell down your face as you began to head down the stairs. Moving it behind your ears, you glanced up and stilled, not even halfway down.

Standing at the bottom was Dean.

His mouth was parted in surprise. Green eyes gazed up at you, wide with disbelief. You stared for a few more moments before quietly walking down and past with a smirk. He lightly pulled you back before you made it out of the hallway.

"Wait a second. You're Bobby Singer's daughter?" Dean asked, almost in awe. His arm was still touching yours.

"Looks like I should have called sooner," you responded. Searching his face for his thoughts did not work as expected. He was confused more than anything, but the light behind his eyes hadn't changed.

Dean ran a hand through his hair and let his arm fall to his side. He glanced around to see if Bobby or the person with him were coming. When it was clear they weren't, Dean turned back to you, unsure of what to do. Once again, another first for him, you were sure. His tongue ran involuntarily over his lower lip and you took that as your cue to wrap your hands around his neck and press your lips to his. His hands gripped your waist, pulling you close. All too soon, the two of you stepped away and headed into the kitchen where you saw a tall man with long hair setting plates on the dining table. Bobby glanced up from the sink.

"There you are, Y/N. I'm hoping Dean was at least half a gentleman and bothered to introduce himself. This is Sam, his brother. You might remember their dad, John Winchester. Now, let me see that book," your dad requested.

You took a small breath and smiled at your dad, passing him the book. "Yeah, uh, Dean introduced himself." You cast him a glance and he seemed to be looking anywhere but at you. You turned to the brother.

"Hi, Sam. Nice to meet you. I'm Y/N," you said. He gave you a polite smile and shook your hand.

"So what's the occasion?" Sam asked. He cleared his throat and gestured at the table.

You raised your eyebrows and turned to Bobby who gave a slight shake of his head. You frowned and faced the brothers, sharing with them that your dad's birthday was in a few days, so you were making a celebratory dinner. Bobby huffed and grumbled under his breath before grabbing the main course and setting it on the frequently unused table. The table technically could have seated six, but as there were four of you, the brothers sat together across from you and Bobby. Despite Dean's glances your way, he stayed relatively quiet as you ate, letting the others focus on the case. Dean's foot accidentally nudged yours, leading to a silent game of footsies. Sam and Bobby were distracted by trying to find the proper spell to undo whatever was going on. You weren't as interested in hunting at this very second. At one point, a sauce was spilled on the page the guys were reading. All at once, they began to apologize.

"No worries, I know how to clean it," you said, carefully grabbing it and heading to the bathroom for the cleaning supplies. Dean excused himself to help search and followed you into the bathroom.

"Pardon me, sweetheart, but what the hell is going on?" He asked softly, still bewildered by the discovery. The door was wide open and you two had a small view of the kitchen though they couldn't see in. You sighed and crouched below the sink to find the proper supplies. It seemed things were rearranged every time you were here.

"You're going to need to be more specific," you said into the drawers.

"How are you Bobby Singer's daughter? I knew he had a kid, but... And no disrespect to the old man, but you are much hotter than he is," Dean admitted. You found what you were looking for and which each object, handed it to Dean, who stared at each one uncertainly.

"Dean, both of these things are very simple. Cleaning this book is easier than changing a tire. Just pour a small bit of the white bottle onto the towel, mix it with the other one, then dab at it and wipe. For the other thing, a long time ago, Bobby and Karen got married and decided to cons-" Dean cut you off, trying to hide a smirk as he followed your instructions.

There was an outline of the liquid left on the page, but after a little more work it eventually disappeared, and the rest would dry soon, you decided. Dean said, "I know how people are created, Y/N, no need to be cute. I guess I'm just surprised that you're a hunter, more so after our talk last night, and especially after how Bobby always praised his kid's good work in school."

The two of you were standing very close in this small bathroom that now reeked of cleaning supply and you wanted to leave the room, but not the moment. Dean began to put the objects away once you confirmed the book was clean. "I'm always cute, Dean. And sure, I did well in school. Why make life harder than necessary? I use what I was taught to make money when I'm not hunting, but it's clearly in my blood, and I wouldn't have it any other way."

Dean appeared taken aback. "Whoa, I didn't mean to offend you. I'm sure you're a great hunter. And an honest living? Admirable, seriously."

He leaned over and gave you a quick peck on the cheek. "Let's get back before they get suspicious and Bobby tries shooting me."

You only laughed in response.

- 

Wattpad/Pinterest: writerfangirlbooks

Tags: @akshi8278​ 

[mittensmorgul]

When I talk about samwena, someone always says that their relationship is motherly, just like when I talk about destiel, someone always says that they are like brothers. Although I firmly believe that Sam and Rowena's relationship is not motherly, it bothers me that Rowena said "this is my boy" to Sam, because she also talked about Crowley, her son. Do you think this was an attempt by the writers to try to turn samwena into a mother-child relationship?

Aw, hi there! and I’m gonna start this by saying that I have written a lot on the subject, and none of it has seemed to change anyone’s mind, so I don’t know whether writing another long post on the subject will, either.

I’m putting this under a cut because it’s long-ish, and because I don’t need saileen shippers attacking me again... y’all have been warned if you don’t wanna read stuff that isn’t glowingly heart-eye’d about them... bearing in mind that I read all the positive saileen posts and just smile and nod politely at them and then move on with my life while shutting up about it...

(sorry about that... I edited this post for a typo and it seems to have messed up the read more cut...)

For years, we’ve watched the relationship between Sam and Rowena grow slowly, and it reached a point somewhere along the line where I couldn’t ignore the blatant romantic themes. The thing is, for me, their relationship can’t possibly work as her being “motherly” toward him. Because Sam has just as often been the provider of comfort/security to her as she has to him, you know?

I’ve seen a lot of people just flat out reject the read of their relationship as romantic, but I think that’s mostly because folks were clinging to the notion that Eileen was actually still alive. Granted, the fact that she had actually been dead all those years was only confirmed after Rowena’s death, but I think folks were dead set on them picking up their “romantic” relationship (which I don’t even think approached romantic in canon until Sam offered her that parting kiss, but again, that’s just me) and immediately were able to dismiss Rowena with that. Despite the fact that Sam (in canon, again) couldn’t just dismiss Rowena and strike up a relationship with Eileen (even after he verbally, repeatedly confirmed that he and Eileen were “not like that” after Dean’s prodding, a lot of people still only had heart-eyes for the two of them, and I get it, I really do, but I don’t see it, and can’t see it as ever having been romantic in canon before that point).

I personally do not think that Eileen will be back as Sam’s endgame love interest, and never have. I know that comment upsets a lot of people who cannot see a happy endgame for Sam without some sort of relationship with Eileen. But canon literally has not laid the groundwork for that. She could come back, he could call her at the end and suggest they give a relationship a try, but to me it would be just that-- not some Grand Romance that has been years in the making, but the very beginning of what could potentially be a happy life together. And I just find that... disappointing on so many levels. But again, that’s just me. If that’s what the show gives us, I’ll personally be incredibly meh about it.

In 15.03, as Rowena is attempting to convince Sam to kill her, to sacrifice her for the spell that was SUPPOSED to save the world, to finally free them from Chuck’s Final Punishment and heal the rift he opened into Hell, she sacrificed herself believing it would be to save Sam and the world. And the key thing to understand here is that her sacrifice did NOT end Chuck’s game of horrors for them. He was SUPPOSED to have left their world after that, and yet he didn’t. He just kept writing, destroying, and pushing them. Eileen was a pawn in his game. I can’t see her as anything more than that, as far as Sam goes anyway. In fact, her return prompted Sam to spend that entire episode thinking about Rowena, learning he was the only one able to enter Rowena’s home without being cursed by her security system. Had to bear the weight of the fact that he was the one who killed her, even if she basically had to force him to do so... Eileen being resurrected felt like cold comfort, especially when Sam still thought it had been Rowena’s one-time-use spell that had brought her back.

Learning that spell had been planted there by Chuck, after Sam had gone to Rowena’s in search of a crystal to trap Eileen’s soul for an eternity (better than going back to Hell or wandering the earth until she went vengeful), (which is admittedly not a very romantic start to any of this), and then learning that Rowena was first Queen in Hell and then had apparently lost control of the place by the next time Sam and Dean went to seek her help... I mean, the whole notion that Rowena was actually happy there is blown to shreds. 

Heck this is getting long, and I already wrote a dissertation on Rowena’s character (too long for tumblr, it’s on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21641770). Somehow every time I start talking about Sam and Rowena’s romantic potential it always devolves into a dissertation on why I can’t see Sam and Eileen as a romantic potential, but that long essay is almost entirely about Rowena herself and has very little to do with shipping at all. I’m not interested in ship wars here. If y’all are happy thinking about Sam and Eileen together, congrats! I’ve written them as a couple in fic! They are cute together! But in canon, there’s no there there...

But back to Rowena, and that final line from 15.03:

ROWENA Hell's closing. The walls are falling. SAM There has to be another way. ROWENA I wish there were... I do. I don't care about anything enough to take my own life. Not you, your brother... not even the world. But I believe in prophecy. I believe in magic. And I'm here, and you're here, and everything we need to end this right is in our hands. [She puts the dagger in Sam’s hands and tries to get him to stab her.] ROWENA I know this in my bones... it has to be this way. Do it! Kill me, Samuel! [Sam hesitates. Rowena puts a hand on his shoulder.] ROWENA I know we've gotten quite fond of each other, haven't we? But will you let the world die, let your brother die, just so I can live? [...] SAM No. [He stabs her, crying. Rowena touches his face.] ROWENA That's my boy. [She twists the dagger where Sam stabbed her. Then, she takes it out.]

(and for every reason why I believe that entire conversation is key to Rowena as a character, again, see that long essay)

Rowena doesn’t do “fond.” She wields flirtations as defensive weapons. She manipulates and shields herself with favors and sensuality. I mean, remember every man she’s had flirtations with-- from the men she’d attempted to con into relationships in order to take them for everything they were worth to flirting with the most powerful being in the room from Chuck right on down to Cas. We know her history, from Crowley’s birth story to how she’d survived for hundreds of years by ingratiating herself to those wealthier and more powerful. Remember those witches in 12.11 who’d basically used her up and dumped her out again. But with Sam? With Sam she’d never made a power play. She’d never aggressively come on to him, never felt the need to assert herself to control him or defend herself from him. He was the only person she’d ever been entirely honest with, about her fears and her concerns.

Sam was the only person, possibly in her entire life, that she trusted fully.

And in return, Sam literally held her life in his hands. Nobody else had the power to kill her, and that is a fuckton of trust to have in someone you will then refer to as “fond of each other.”

I mean, honestly

how is that not romantic?

And yet her final attempt to comfort him after he’s done what she asked of him and has tears streaming down his face is “that’s my boy...”

What was she supposed to do? Kiss him? Knowing she would die and condemn herself to Hell didn’t seem like the right time for anything else... And yet now she is trapped there after a futile sacrifice that failed to save the world.

The look of abject shock on Sam’s face in 15.08 when they find her in Hell is telling. She dismisses him to refill her drink, because I don’t think she could bear that look on his face, and then advises Dean and Cas to fix their own mess. And that, to me, only served to underscore the fact that her own mess remained unfixed, and possibly unfixable at that point, you know? She was still dead, still trapped in Hell because of her own choices. She hadn’t even earned redemption for that sacrifice.

Are we supposed to believe that she’s still condemned to that fate, and that’s just the end of her story in an “oh well, moving on” sort of way just so Sam can have a cute lil fledgling relationship with Eileen (who left, with no immediate intention to return) and forget all about all of that? Nah, no thank you.

There are seven more episodes to air, and one of the major things I personally feel needs to be resolved with Chuck’s imminent dismissal from his creation (because honestly do any of us believe that Chuck won’t be defeated in the end?) is the reorganization of the whole of Heaven and Hell. Something tells me that without Chuck manipulating creation, Heaven and Hell will not survive as they are, and then what would happen to Rowena? I think she’s still important to the story, or at least I hope she is.

It will be interesting to see how this all plays out, and I don’t have any definitive guesses about anything, but to me, this is the only way things can play out happily for Sam, saving Rowena the same way Cas once saved Dean (sorry Saileen shippers, I know Sam “saved” Eileen already, but uh... there’s about 50 asterisks on that where Chuck’s desired story just falls apart all over the place, especially the peek into the future Chuck gave Sam in 15.09).

[dundunny]

FFVIIR: Bitching About Minor Details

Here’s where me as a hardcore fan comes in to nitpick about stuff that doesn’t matter and weren’t a deal breaker, but I just wanna vent:

This was something the developers could not control, but I still miss: The shitty graphics allowed funnier situations. Because they literally only had eyes and no face, the characters needed to use exaggerated motions to convey body language. Remember how Sephiroth laughed, how he would put one hand on his mouth and raise the other hand? Who does that? Or how Cloud would raise his fist to his breast and swing it outward to show he’s making a declarative statement? Or how they fucking jumped? With their arms stretched to the heavens and their legs pointed downwards like they were preparing to drill into the earth? Or how they jumped literally everywhere? You’d be talking to someone and suddenly they’d leap twelve feet across the room instead of walking like a normal human being? Oh man, that was so much fun to watch.

Whoever designed the weapon upgrades menu deserves a special place in hell. When I saw that little animation that zooms you in on the “solar systems,” I knew that was gonna get old really fast, especially since this seems to be a place you return to often. I was right. You know what also would’ve been great? A list that shows me all the bonuses on the weapons. On paper one weapon may be shit--less attack or whatever--but it has other buffs like increased MP regeneration. How do I see that? Well, go through the zooming animation. Flick through all the “solar systems” to read all the buffs. Go through another animation to leave. Move to the next weapon. More zoom animation. Flick through. Oh wait, did the last weapon have increased wind attack? Gotta go through a zoom out animation. Go back to the previous weapon. Zoom in. Flick through. OK, it didn’t. Zoom out again. Back to the second weapon... That was fucking stupid. Just let me press square or something as I’m highlighting the weapon and see what I’ve done with it.

The new music was shitty and you spent the whole time waiting for Uematsu’s music to come back on.

Why is there daylight? That was part of the problem with Midgar; no one could see the sun anymore. NPCs would mention it, and even if you flew over it on the Highwind all the sun was snuffed out. As late as Crisis Core this was a thing, so why suddenly bring in the light? Having no sun shows how fucked up Shinra and Midgar was: so much pollution that everyone’s circadian rhythms are thrown off and you can never tell what time it is.

Still on the fence being privy to Shinra’s plans beforehand in Reactor 5. It was shocking to suddenly see President Shinra appear in the original, but it was interesting to see the steps the company took beforehand.

The Turks were mishandled. Let me say they look a lot better than in the original because their clothing actually fits instead of this zoot suit nonsense before. But the Turks were hard. The first fight was three vs. one on top of the pillar, and Reno ended it just because he ran out of time. We were insects compared to him. Allowing Cloud to beat the shit out of Reno at the very beginning takes away their badassery, but I’m thankful they’re not the comedy relief like in Advent Children.

Also on the fence about attaching Wutai and AVALANCHE. I can see how Shinra uses it to stir up fears, but Wutai was so thoroughly neutered that no one in Midgar talked about them.

If Don Cornello is personally involved in the coliseum fight, and he should’ve seen Aeris and Cloud beforehand and knew something was up. We’re supposed to be keeping this on the down low. Why did they also gas them and put them in the torture room? Why not just lead them to the room? it’s a weird and unnecessary step.

The pillar collapse scene was magnificent in the original. You could hear the screams of thousands of people as the plate started going down, and suddenly it was cut off as they all died simultaneously. Then you hear another voice and for a moment you think it’s more screaming until you realize it’s opera, and it’s fucking President Shinra in his office, watching the whole thing and listening to the goddamned opera as innocent lives were extinguished on his orders. Everything ends with a shot of the Shinra Building, and it really stuck it in your gut how fucked up the whole situation was and who was responsible. I can’t expect an exact replica, but damn, that was so nicely done.

The Shinra Building is in my top three favorite dungeons of all time, so there was no way they would be able to achieve my expectations, but what I loved about it is each floor had a unique puzzle you needed to solve to progress to the next one. That was for the most part removed. Also, why give the option to go up the stairs if I need to walk in the front door anyway?

Why the hell is the Shinra Building so fucking dark? Do you remember in the final Harry Potter movie when they’re in Malfoy Manor and the director exaggerated the black to signify their wickedness that became laughable because no one would live like that in real life? The Shinra Building reminded me of that. It was so bright before because it’s a goddamned electric company.

Seriously, I can’t play as Red XIII? Seriously? C’mon. This isn’t Final Fantasy XII. I was so looking forward to playing as him and then I got a punch right to the gut.

Also, you were allowed to reorganize your materia between the Rufus fight and elevator fight, and they took that out so fuck you, fuck you, fuck you.

Chocobo/Mog was so ridiculous back in 1997 I couldn’t stop laughing for a good minute when I first saw it, and this cute thing I got now isn’t gonna cut it.

EDIT: Sometimes when you saw Legolas in The Lord of the Rings, his shit got kinda ridiculous, right? Like when he took down an elephant by himself? Yeah, cool, he’s an elf, elves are cool, but it’s getting to be too much? Cloud on a motorcycle is like that. When did he manage to get those skills? He was never in SOLDIER. He was a fucking grunt. Unless Jenova has mad cycling skillz, I don’t know where he got this from.

Part 1 2 3 4 5 6

[thelightofthingshopedfor]

as usual, an unrealistic list of things I’d really like to get done over the three-day weekend, which is not super likely to go well considering I’m posting this at 5 fucking p.m. but whatever:

gaming-related

I have exactly a month left on my (so far unused, whoops) PC Game Pass subscription, so I need to go over my wish list again and identify

which games have achievements

each game’s average playtime so I can prioritize

which ones interest me the most (emphasis on spooky games because...it’s spooky season)

try Fallout 76 once it finally finishes downloading, because I played the free weekend on Steam before and this is Microsoft, and...I think my character should just be on their servers but I don’t actually know hahahaha yeah that super didn’t work, maybe in a week when our billing cycle restarts I’ll try redownloading and reinstalling it, and anyway I did download and test a couple other Game Pass games

cancel my current SWTOR subscription so I’m not still paying for that while focusing on Game Pass games

play one of a few Flash games on my to-play list, if there’s something short

misc/housekeeping

check out my current backup situation and see how hard it would be to modify, I mean at some point I have got to set up an actual system but for some reason that’s intimidating so if what I currently have is at all usable, I should add to it

and then verify my drivers. I don’t know what’s wrong with my PC and I’m really not sure how to figure that out but since Memtest86 ran for three fucking hours and came back clear, it seems like this is the next major step in the troubleshooting process okay I actually didn’t do this but I did try some other things that also didn’t work

finish claiming all the Black Panther comics

a tiny bit of room cleaning? maybe?? I actually already did a very tiny bit, and this is something (one of...many things) I could do while on a call with friends, which is also in my plans

open a couple packages from one of said friends, which keen-eyed readers might note was in a to-do list ages ago oops

check Tumblr drafts

work on modifying or fixing some masks that currently aren’t working well

send an email that’s been on my to-do list for...a while

actually another email would be a good one too

keep trying to get Hazy to learn that letting people handle her paws results in good treats, so we can make an appointment for a Petco nail trim (and ideally clip them ourselves, sometimes)

ah fuck I still need to finish my will

creative

mildly edit the short fic I posted a few days ago, give it a title, and toss it on AO3

as always, some typing would be really really good

so would...some writing...

make some more potion bottles with, uh, random stuff I’ve collected on recent walks around the neighborhood (other potion bottles with other random ideas I’ve had wouldn’t be a bad idea either...and I would like to try one of the Youtube tutorials I found for making tiny hourglasses, but I guess that’s probably not a priority)

do a little reorganizing in my giant to-do lists for a) 1/6-scale projects and b) lyrics for titles

doing more research on parts for a 1/6 female Loki is really not urgent but...I might want to...and some things are on sale right now...

repair Tiny Loki’s tiny mask

rewrite my paper list of prioritized projects, which I needed to do anyway, but now I’ve also lost the original and that’s very annoying (also make a pocket for it in my notebook so this is less likely to happen again)

make designs for a few new Pride Cap shields, maybe? it really would not take long to make just a few, and now is when I should be adding stuff to Etsy if I have any hope of like...holiday sales

for that matter, now would be an extremely good time to at least start planning what kinds of holiday-specific things (and/or other new listings) I might be able to make in time to list them on Etsy

mental health

write up a post for the ADHD Reddit and maybe other related places

experiment with Notion and Airtable as organizational options

research some bullet-journal layouts to see if anything seems like it would work for me

in general, spend some time just kind of...brainstorming the type of system that would be useful for me in keeping my shit together, so I have a better idea of what I’m looking for (also probably helpful to list like...the big problems I’m trying to fix)

see if Penzu seems like a good option for a keeping-my-shit-together strategy I have in mind from my latest therapy session, and if not, do a little research on other journal-type possibilities

shopping I probably shouldn’t be doing

make a Michaels order tomorrow when both coupons will be active, because...there are some Halloween things that are somehow already sold out at the nearest store but I still want them...and they’re available at the store all the way across town...so...

possibly go to an estate sale benefiting the rescue group where we got Scully and Hazy, which is also all the way over on the other side of town but if I’m going over there anyway, I might as well

some stuff in my Etsy cart that I don’t want to miss

ditto eBay, I think mostly in my cart but also check watch list

AliExpress is also having some sales and yes there are more tiny things I want to buy for Loki’s arcane workshop, shut up (but also if I’m going to buy another Hot Toys body, this time for Thor, I gotta...take some measurements)

politics

call legislators

I really don’t know why I bother but I’ve found a bunch more articles recently that I’d like to throw on Facebook

for that matter at some point I’m probably just going to do a Facebook post like “hey, if you care about me at all, please consider voting Biden,” which also probably won’t make a difference but like...there’s a tiny chance it might

actually write those Sierra Club letters to voters that I meant to do like...two weeks ago...and maybe also some postcards, idk

maybe go to a thing Monday afternoon

also maybe just like...look through my links and folders to see who’s doing textbanking? like I don’t necessarily have to do any of it this weekend, just figure out what’s available?

........hmm this is all a terrible idea, probably, in part because my brain is looking at this absurdly long list and still going “oh shit, oh fuck, we’re forgetting something major aren’t we!!!”

[comicteaparty]

February 15th-February 21st, 2020 Creator Babble Archive

The archive for the Creator Babble chat that occurred from February 15th, 2020 to February 21st, 2020.  The chat focused on the following question:

If a company wanted to publish your comic or adapt it for animation or games, how willing would you be to change the story if requested to do so?

FeatherNotes(Krispy)

That's such a tough question just because it's such a goal for so many creators, and yet a potential threat to their creativity in a sense. As always, it will depend on what exactly would be changed in order for such a project to be given approval. If it has to do with censoring LGBTQ+ content, changing race for 'marketability' purposes and the like, or erasing a specific topic integral to the plot with relation to politics- then it's a no go. There are plenty enough watered down media that doesn't stretch itself with diversity those companies can have and the subtext they pepper in to stay relevant, def something i find irksome with todays media (its 2020 guys !!) But if it's maybe cutting a chapter that acts like filler, or adding a character ( so long as it is plot relevant) i could take that into consideration! I actually take some time to imagine what Ghost Junk would be in a diff form of media and usually in those scenarios, things change to fit the way its being presented! A video game will differ more than an anime adaptation for sure, so long as the original intent and impact is kept, i would definitely consider some change!

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

If I ever had the opportunity to pass my work off to a whole other team for an adaptation, I think I would take great joy in leaving them completely to it - barring a few obvious issues like race changes, gender/sexuality changes, and... changing the entire story to the point where it's unrecognizable. I love seeing reinterpretations of my work, and I understand that every adaptation would need changes of some form. My words and art aren't gospel - I'm open to any change if it improves the whole product. Whatever it takes to translate the material in the best way, which keeps the original message intact, is all good by me.

Changes in the actual comic would be harder to make - and I'd be far less comfortable with them, to be honest - but I wouldn't fight them if they obviously made the story/characters stronger. I've already added in ideas and reorganized plot threads based on reader feedback - luckily the story still has some places where it can bend. So long as a publisher took my basic story seriously, and aimed to remold it rather than remake it - I'd be down for a discussion. Hopefully a reputable publisher would know how best to sell my work, and would aim to make it as good as possible while maintaining integrity - I would try to trust them

chalcara

Comic stays mine, won‘t be changed beyound perhaps some professional line edits and polish. There’s a reason I didn’t shop it around as a graphic novel. I’d actually like that eitherway, would love to get myself a professional editor when I have the money. Adaptions can go nuts, provided the main characters stay true to their comic versions and the woman-loves-woman storyline stays in.

Holmeaa - working on WAYFINDERS

For the story to be told in another medium I would be pretty game for it to change the story a bit. Already now we are changing the story from how we made as a campaign. Makeing it more streamlined and more precise. I wanted originally that our comic could be a TV show. I come from a background of a character animator so that would make sense for me. So seeing it animated would be awesome! There would be some designs that needed to change to fit animation better.

Like Andree has this texture in his skin that needed to go away. But seeing it animated would be awesooome

Deo101 [Millennium]

I think if my Characters stay in Character, then I'm fine with changing pretty much any of the plot or world things. But the Character dynamics and who they are as people is what matters most to me, and I'm not sure I would be willing to sacrifice that. With some of my stories I'd be willing to completely let go of the reins, and with others I definitely want a tighter grip, too.

sagaholmgaard

Agree with the thing about character dynamics. My stories always stem from the characters' relationships and how they evolve, so I'd like for the essence of that to stay. Otherwise I'm pretty loose about the plot itself. Because I have an education in game development, I would totally be down for my comic being adapted into a story driven game of some sort. I'd be okay with changing the story to favor the game mechanics, like putting certain magic abilities in the focus and turning certain scenes into gameplay (like when they're sneaking around or fighting). As long as my handful of core emotional moments come across, I'm pretty happy to change things.

Tuyetnhi

I agree with the character dynamics too. I don't feel comfortable if they change the character backgrounds along with it as well for er what Krispy said for "Markability". That stuff won't fly with me. Comic stuff stay the same but for adaptations, I want to make sure it has similar story beats even if there's a change on few details. Tbh I could totally see er....a visual novel game happening in my comic since that's what my original intention was going for. still at the end I really don't intend my comic to transend other mediums since i'm planning to self publish the story someday lol.

kayotics

I’d be pretty willing to change stuff, actually. I’d want to be pretty involved in whatever adaptation was being made in this hypothetical, but I know that more people can make for stronger work. On the other hand, too many cooks can make for some pretty watered down soup, which is why I’d want to have a large role in things so some of the core stuff doesn’t get changed. But as it is, I’m not married to any ideas that exist in my comic, and am pretty welcome to changes.

DanitheCarutor

If the changes were to benefit the story than I wouldn't mind, if they were going to change everything to make it appealing to the masses than no. Definitely not if they want to mess with the characters since how they are play a major role in the comic. I've got a really specific story I'm trying to tell, so I'm very stingy on changes. If anything I'd be more open to a company making a spin-off or something not totally related to the main story, as long as it's not a complete bastardization. Other than free advertising and the brand name, I don't really see how getting published would benefit me anyway? I'm already in the process of rescanning and re-editing the first four chapters of my comic for self-publishing, if I really wanted to adapt it into an animation I would just do it myself. Along with teaching myself whatever else I needed to get as little help as possible. Sure, I have no experience but it's not like I can't learn, there are classes and free tutorials all over the internet. I've always wanted to get into animating. I can't imagine my comic being adapted into game, what would it even be? An anti-dating sim? An interactive novel? An Apollo drinking simulator?

Capitania do Azar

I WANT A BEAT THEM UP JUST RUN IN ONE DIRECTION KICK EVERYONE

eli [a winged tale]

The dream is a studio ghibli adaption but that won’t be happening I would want to vet the studio/company proposing the adaption and ensure that we are a good fit. I echo what many of you have said about the integrity of the characters and heart of the story. There are a lot of secrets that will come to unravel as the comic progresses and I hope the publisher will be accepting of them. I will be happy to have a conversation on why these structural changes are there and why I think it’s important to allow them to reach a wider audience. That said, I am also eager to see how they would themselves interpret the story and I will give creative freedom to that. Again, it’s a dream and while I would love to direct my own film, I simply don’t have the resources to do it (at this time). https://www.instagram.com/s/aGlnaGxpZ2h0OjE3ODQ3MzIzMTM3NjY4MDA0?igshid=15bnlhamdu3tn&story_media_id=2149085305360952847

Capitania we should just have a super smash bros of all our comic characters

renieplayerone

I think like a lot of people here have already said, Im not changing anyones race, gender identity or sexuality. Otherwise? I'd be really curious what someone else's perspectives could bring to my work if it ever got adapted. I have ideas for comics that are written like they could be movies too, but idk. Its fun trying to write thinking of other mediums

mariah (rainy day dreams)

Im pretty much in the same camp of make changes as it makes sense, but stay true to the core. In the case of a live action thing being made of my story, I would actually be super ok with a POC actor filling the role of any of the white presenting characters. Or actors with different body shapes that what I'd originally draw. More diversity in film is always good

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

outside of censorship, I would be fine with most story changes? with that said, good luck lol. there are very few scenes I think can be cut out of the story without supremely messing up later scenes. every magic ability on-screen is important in some way, a bunch of random background characters end up coming back & getting way more focus later on, etc. add filler, sure, but there's really not much you can cut out without messing up the entire story down the line.

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

I'm pretty open to the idea of changing some details to fit a different medium better. The big thing that I wouldn't want changed in Whispers of the Past (https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/whispers-of-the-past/list?title_no=191366) is the characters' races. Since the story explores the idea of culture-shock and cultural identity, and the races/cultures are integral to world-building, it would be stupid the change the characters' appearances/races willy nilly. And besides, we don't want what happened to Eragon or Percy Jackson when they became movies. Congratulations on completely killing a franchise But yeah, as long as races and major plot details aren't changed too much, I'm really open to adjusting things. As an example, cutting out smexy times or making the language a bit friendlier to a wide audience, fine by me. But changing Kelan to a blacksmith instead of a farmer... Why???? I would need a good reason to do something like that. (I'M TALKING ABOUT YOU, ERAGON! WHY WAS RORAN JOINING THE ARMY RANDOMLY, INSTEAD OF BECOMING A MILLER? ISN'T THE ARMY WORKING FOR THE EVIL KING WHO TAXES THEM HEAVILY? EXPLAIN THIS TO ME.) I'm actually pretty scared about the whole race thing. I mean, Hollywood also ruined The ]

if the adaptation is Bad I can always just, like, disown it lmao

Deo101 [Millennium]

clearly im the one with the ideas here B) soo

LMAO yea

Cap’n Lee (Flowerlark Studios)

If it was being published as a comic, I don’t think I’d be willing to change too much- though that would depend a great deal in what kind of change. Cleaning up some wonky dialogue? That would probably be fine. Censorship? Absolutely not. Changing my LGBTQ+ characters’ gender / orientation to appeal to the mainstream? Really absolutely not. If being adapted to a different medium, I’d be much more willing to change things around, but would still insist my minority characters not change their identities. But I understand that as far as plot goes, different mediums call for different approaches. I’m planning on writing my comics as novels someday, and will be taking a much different approach to them. The plots will definitely be altered a great deal to better fit being written in prose.(edited)

AntiBunny

It honestly depends on what the changes were. There's a fair amount I'd change myself. A few core things I'd certainly not change though.

In AntiBunny http://AntiBunny.net/ for instance I could see some people missing the point of Penelope's character being a pacifist and wanting to make her some kind of badass, as if the only kind of strength there is comes from violence. I wouldn't remove the question of Pooky's gender, as in order to ask the question of "what is identity" I stripped Pooky of everything including even a mental construct of gender.

Some things I would change though. Likely I would cut the first two chapters and start at the 3rd when the plot actually gets moving. So demands for a faster flowing plot I could certainly meet. I'd probably cut few extra characters from the cast to streamline things a bit.

So yes for the purposes of streamlining things I'd make changes. I wouldn't make changes that would go against the entire point of the cahracters though.

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

Oh, a conversation in #general reminded me of something else regarding adapting Super Galaxy Knights Deluxe R - If the comic is to be adapted with no changes at all, it'd be a legal nightmare. Off the top of my head, these are properties that have been directly stated in dialogue - - Yahtzee - Risk - Mario Kart - Settlers of Catan - Pokemon - Disney's Frozen I don't think you could technically get in trouble for any of those? It's not like anything copyrighted was shown on screen, it's just characters talking about things they've seen before. But a publisher would probably want to play it safe and avoid that. Also... the NFL might get mad at the publisher if the gang names in Cunoze City aren't changed? Like I don't ever say the team location, so technically full team names are never used... but again, it's probably best to play it safe.

Desnik

I'd be pretty flexible with changes, but if I have to take out demons to appeal to the Evangelical Christian states of America then obvs that's not going to work out

(And you wouldn't think that'd be a Thing to this day, but apparently it's been sort of this unspoken rule in book publishing since the Satanic Panic of the 80's in the US)

Some changes I'd be okay with: Adjusting ages of characters to appeal to target demographics, removing scenes that are difficult to draw, tweaking characters to be either more or less horrible depending on their role in the story

FeatheryJustice

I will be flexible to a point and the limit of this point is pretty align to my morals. If the editor tells me to include some weird things like "You must have a scene where this guy licks the curtains" I would also be like "What is the point of this scene."(edited)

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

“Your protagonist must fight a giant spider in the third act.”

Deo101 [Millennium]

I mean, if you bring up giant spiders in the first act... well...

Q (Wayfinders: Off Course)

Turn it around: if your protag must fight spiders in the third act, well, time to bring in the spiders in the first..?

AntiBunny

The more I think of it, the more I realize that the most likely thing I'd be asked to change in AntiBunny is to either tone down the violence and grimdark for kids, or make it even raunchier to appeal to the "mature" (not mature at all) animation market (Seth McFarlane's audience).

My own comic keeps it rather PG-13, but there's not much market for animation in that field, at least in America. Seems like it's all either kid friendly stories where no one dies or if they do it's off screen (people get shot and stabbed in my comic) or there's the opposite with dropping F bombs every other line and filling it with sex jokes.

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

Hey, I mean, never say never. Off the top of my head, Futurama and the Samurai Jack revival were both western cartoons that I'd put solidly in PG-13 territory. Both shows were able to go adult when they needed to be, but they didn't take that as a blank check to go into "rated R" territory for the shock of it.

[theonyxpath]

So we end the year of 2018! So odd that Dec 31 is on a Monday Meeting day, so we’re really just squeaking the meeting in before everybody goes hither and yon to their New Year‘s celebrations.

Amazingly, almost everybody was there, and so I have a few points we discussed before ending this year’s worth of MMN blogs with our Onyx Path crew’s New Year’s Resolutions. Let’s get to it!

In the usual explosion of Kickstarter Updates we sent out last week, I started with a very special one to our Scarred Lands PG backers. The SL Kickstarter had an uphill climb to resolution having to recover from my good old friend Stewart Wieck’s death before the books were shipped.

So it was only fitting, and in my thinking positive, that I could announce to them that the next Scarred Lands project (and Kickstarter) would be the Scarred Lands Creature Collection for 5e and that Onyx Path would be working on the project with Handiwork Games – founded by another buddy, Jon Hodgson.

Jon and his team at Handiwork will be writing, art directing, and laying out the project, as well as running the Kickstarter, and we are thrilled to be able to bring their creative talents and energy honed after many years working for Cubicle7 to what is possibly the signature Scarred Lands book.

For those of you not aware of the history of the first Creature Collection book, it was published in an audacious move just as D&D 3rd Edition released the legendary d20 and OGL licenses. We heard that first they’d be publishing the 3e Players Guide and then later the 3e Monster Manual, and jumped in, wrote, illustrated, and published Creature Collection just before the 3e MM was released.

So, it’s a project near and dear to my heart, and I think that Jon’s crew are going to do amazing and beautiful things with it!

Changeling: The Lost 2e Jumpstart art by Tilen Javornik

Rather than boost more of our mentions in podcasts, or articles, or our Onyx Pathcast, or Kickstarters, I’m going to be pulling all those items down to The Blurbs! below, and for this next year I’ll be aiming at utilizing this space as a way to talk more directly to you about what’s up with Onyx Path.

That was how we got started with it just one day short of 7 years ago, so I’d like to get back there after this last year of reorganization.

And in The Blurbs! below you’ll already find information about our latest Kickstarter, They Came From Beneath the Sea!, which has done a lot better over the Christmas holiday than we expected, and now I’ve added a new section called Onyx Path Media for descriptions and links to the Onyx Pathcast, and other Onyx Path vids, as well as to Actual Plays, etc. from other folks enjoying our worlds.

Roll of Good Dogs and Excellent Cats art by Pat Loboyko

Herein lieth our Onyx Path crew’s New Year’s Resolutions for 2019:

From Mirthful Mike Chaney: “My big one for 2019 is to add more artists to the Ex3 pool and clear the log jam in that line’s production process so we can get 4 titles a year out for Ex3.”

From Monica Valentinelli: “I’m trying something new this year, because resolutions tend to fizzle before the first signs of Spring. For 2019, I’m changing my resolution to a one-word mantra: movement. From shipping manuscripts to rolling dice, there’s a lot of ways I can see this word applying to what we do at Onyx Path. Onwards to 2019!”

From Matthew “The Gentleman Gamer” Dawkins: “My new year’s resolution is to give a little more time to myself in 2019! My video game and reading time was way down in 2018, and I need to amend that in the coming year. Taking advantage of my leisure time rather than spending a lot of it on social media would go a long way toward making a more satisfied Matthew.”

From Dangerous Dixie Cochran: “In 2019, I want to, as Neil Gaiman said, “make good art.” More than that, I want to encourage others to make art, whether good or no. (Funny story, making bad art is the first step on the road to making good art.) I’ve always joked that I’m a support class in real life: I edit what others write, I help folks with problems, and I enjoy building people up and helping their voices be heard. I want to do more of that in the coming year. I want to work on helping people who are underrepresented into spotlights, and continue to showcase the current slate of amazing talent we have now. I want to work with amazing creators to figure out how to best polish their work, not just for them. I want to work on dozens of new and interesting and phenomenal books, and I want to see creatives in our field (and others) shine that maybe haven’t had the opportunity before.

I also want to meet more of you, the folks who keep us going. If you have live streams or events or podcasts, I want to hear about them! I also hope you come to the conventions we attend and say hello! Essentially, I want 2019 to be about community and coming together for the betterment of all parties involved. Happy New Year!”

From LisaT: “I’m going to try to establish a more permanent workspace in order to facilitate keeping better track of my broadening work responsibilities. And to establish some new skills in Excel and other programs to improve bookkeeping.”

From Jaunty James Bell, our Kickstarter Concierge: “2018 had a lot of transition for me – health challenges for my parents and new activities (and jobs!) for my children redefined my role as a son and father, keeping me busy. In 2019, I’m going to try to help family and friends as best I can, avoid the anger and despair from social media as much as possible, fall in love with each new kickstarter project, be organized, communicate clearly, and play more games!”

From Impish Ian Watson: “For 2019, I’d like to take more time to play games, and do some recreational reading. I enjoy both, but lately I’ve been spending my spare time on YouTube or whatever and not enough time with novels or game books.”

From Fast Eddy Webb: “In 2019, I resolve to make a second creator-owned property. It may not see the light of day in 2019, but I’d like to be in a place where I can start designing by the end of the year.”

From Mighty Matt McElroy: Well, Matt didn’t get me his resolution as he’s on a well-deserved and oft-postponed vacation (I hope!). So we won’t bother him, but I’ll give him an easy one based on past years’: “I’m going to drink all the coffee, and work crazy hours, and do seventeen person’s jobs.”

From RichT: “Gonna do more hands-on art and just be more hands-on with our projects this coming year. I participated in Inktober, and doing a piece of illustration a day was a marathon, but also was a joy that reconnected me to my art-creating roots.”

Happy New Year as we move into our eighth year as a company! Thanks to you all for your support in 2018 (and earlier) and talk to you next year all about our:

Many Worlds, One Path!

BLURBS!

KICKSTARTER:

They Came From Beneath the Sea! (TCFBtS!) funded on Kickstarter in less than 48 hours and we’ve passed through the first couple of Stretch Goals of getting Larry Blamire to illustrate a horizontal scene usable on a screen, the beginning of a book of additional Threats, and we are rising up on the next goal!

TCFBtS! has some very different additions to the Storypath mechanics we’ll be explaining during the KS that take an excellent 50’s action and investigation genre game and turn it to 11! You can see the actual play here:

Check out the teaser:https://youtu.be/kxLydk4t76s

Hope to see you there back in the 50’s, fighting watery menaces and cracking wise!

ONYX PATH MEDIA

Illustration by Michael Gaydos

This Friday’s Onyx Pathcast features an interview with SuperFan Jacob Burgess recorded at PAX Unplugged where he and Eddy ramble on hi-lariously, for quite some time I hear, all about his Bloodlines actual plays, his writing on Book of Oblivion, and maybe some hints about what he’ll be doing for us in 2019!

https://onyxpathcast.podbean.com/

And Here’s More Media About Our Worlds:

The Story Told RPG Podcast have recently provided coverage of Scion Origin and Scion Hero, both of which will help anyone looking for insight into those two games. The same podcast will be launching actual plays of Exalted and Scion in the coming weeks, so stay tuned to their channels!

Origin: http://thestorytold.libsyn.com/episode-16-scion-2nd-edition-origin-overview

Hero: http://thestorytold.libsyn.com/episode-17-scion-hero-overview 

The fine fellows at Caffeinated Conquests have started up the first streamed play of They Came from Beneath the Sea! Here’s the link to part one: https://youtu.be/pTpeQVIbv08And here’s the link to their Twitch channel so you can tune in to this game, and their other games, live: https://www.twitch.tv/caffeinatedconquests

The excellent team of Niveau Suivant are running a Scion actual play on YouTube and Twitch, and already have a log of videos should you wish to catch up on old episodes! You’ll need to be a French speaker for this one, or at least someone who enjoys the French accent: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLWC9p0HmTWK5C6FUpBQQSZnbakH5u1cTx And here’s their Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/niveausuivant

ELECTRONIC GAMING:

As we find ways to enable our community to more easily play our games, the Onyx Dice Rolling App is now live! Our dev team has been doing updates since we launched based on the excellent use-case comments by our community, and this thing is both rolling and rocking!

ON AMAZON AND BARNES & NOBLE:

You can now read our fiction from the comfort and convenience of your Kindle (from Amazon) and Nook (from Barnes & Noble).

If you enjoy these or any other of our books, please help us by writing reviews on the site of the sales venue you bought it from. Reviews really, really help us with getting folks interested in our amazing fiction!

Our selection includes these fiction books:

OUR SALES PARTNERS:

We’re working with Studio2 to get Pugmire out into stores, as well as to individuals through their online store. You can pick up the traditionally printed main book, the Screen, and the official Pugmire dice through our friends there! http://bit.ly/2w0aaEW

And we’ve added Prince’s Gambit to our Studio2 catalog: https://studio2publishing.com/products/prince-s-gambit-card-game

Looking for our Deluxe or Prestige Edition books? Try this link! http://www.indiepressrevolution.com/xcart/Onyx-Path-Publishing/

Here’s the link to the press release we put out about how Onyx Path is now selling through Indie Press Revolution: http://theonyxpath.com/press-release-onyx-path-limited-editions-now-available-through-indie-press-revolution/

And you can now order Pugmire: the book, the screen, and the dice! http://www.indiepressrevolution.com/xcart/manufacturers.php?manufacturerid=296

DRIVETHRURPG.COM:

This week, we’re offering PDF and PoD versions of the Promethean 2e book, Night Horrors: The Tormented on DTRPG!

CONVENTIONS

Start getting ready for our appearance at MidWinter NEXT WEEK in January in Milwaukee! So many demos, playtests, secret playtests, and Onyx Path Q&As you could plotz!

And now, the new project status updates!

DEVELOPMENT STATUS FROM FAST EDDY WEBB (projects in bold have changed status since last week):

First Draft (The first phase of a project that is about the work being done by writers, not dev prep)

20 The Technocracy Reloaded (Mage: the Ascension 20th Anniversary Edition)

M20 Victorian Mage (Mage: the Ascension 20th Anniversary Edition)

City of the Towered Tombs (Cavaliers of Mars)

Mummy: The Curse 2nd Edition core rulebook (Mummy: The Curse 2nd Edition)

Geist2e Fiction Anthology (Geist: The Sin-Eaters 2nd Edition)

Pirates of Pugmire (Realms of Pugmire)

Distant Worlds (Trinity Continuum: Aeon)

Dragon-Blooded Novella #1 (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Across the Eight Directions (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Exalted Essay Collection (Exalted)

Legendlore core book (Legendlore)

Creatures of the World Bestiary (Scion 2nd Edition)

Chicago Folio/Dossier (Vampire: The Masquerade 5th Edition)

Let The Streets Run Red (Vampire: The Masquerade 5th Edition)

Redlines

Deviant: The Renegades (Deviant: The Renegades)

Witch-Queen of the Shadowed Citadel (Cavaliers of Mars)

Scion Companion: Mysteries of the World (Scion 2nd Edition)

Memento Mori: the GtSE 2e Companion (Geist: The Sin-Eaters 2nd Edition)

C20 Novel (Jackie Cassada) (Changeling: the Dreaming 20th Anniversary Edition)

Second Draft

Tales of Good Dogs – Pugmire Fiction Anthology (Pugmire)

Heirs to the Shogunate (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Scion Ready Made Characters (Scion 2nd Edition)

Scion Jumpstart (Scion 2nd Edition)

Development

Hunter: the Vigil 2e core (Hunter: the Vigil 2nd Edition)

CofD Contagion Chronicle (Chronicles of Darkness)

Lunars: Fangs at the Gate (Exalted 3rd Edition)

WoD Ghost Hunters (World of Darkness)

Oak, Ash, and Thorn: Changeling: The Lost 2nd Companion (Changeling: The Lost 2nd)

CofD Dark Eras 2 (Chronicles of Darkness)

Night Horrors: Nameless and Accursed (Mage: the Awakening Second Edition)

Manuscript Approval:

Wr20 Book of Oblivion (Wraith: The Oblivion 20th Anniversary Edition)

Trinity Continuum: Aberrant core (Trinity Continuum: Aberrant)

Editing:

Aeon Aexpansion (Trinity Continuum: Aeon)

Dystopia Rising: Evolution (Dystopia Rising: Evolution)

M20 Book of the Fallen (Mage: the Ascension 20th Anniversary Edition)

Adventures for Curious Cats (Monarchies of Mau)

In Media Res (Trinity Continuum: Core)

Tales of Excellent Cats (Monarchies of Mau)

V5 Chicago By Night (Vampire: The Masquerade)

V5 Chicago By Night Screen (Vampire: The Masquerade)

Spilled Blood (Vampire: The Requiem 2nd Edition)

Night Horrors: Shunned by the Moon (Werewolf: The Forsaken 2nd Edition)

Post-Editing Development:

C20 Players’ Guide (Changeling: the Dreaming 20th Anniversary Edition)

Signs of Sorcery (Mage: the Awakening Second Edition)

Indexing:

Scion Origin (Scion Second Edition)

Scion Hero (Scion Second Edition)

ART DIRECTION FROM MIRTHFUL MIKE:

In Art Direction

Dystopia Rising: Evolution – Finals coming in.

The Realm 

Ex3 Monthly Stuff – more art going over to WW.

Chicago By Night – Contracting next bits.

C20 Player’s Guide – Finals coming in and going in for WW approval.

Aeon Aexpansion

They Came From Beneath the Sea! – KS ready.

EX3 Lunars – Some KS finals coming in.

Signs of Sorcery – Just need fulls to come in this week.

In Media Res – Contracted.

Hunter: The Vigil 2 – KS art in progress.

Shunned By the Moon – Awaiting notes.

Marketing Stuff

In Layout

Ex Novel 2 (Aaron Rosenberg) – With Meredith.

Geist 2e

Proofing

Scion Hero – Indexing.

Scion Origin –  Indexing.

CtL2 Jumpstart – Shutting down errata.

M20: Gods and Monsters

Pugmire Roll of Good Dogs and Cats – 2nd Proof sent out.

Trinity Core – Gathering errata.

Trinity Aeon – Gathering errata.

Ex3 Dragon Blooded – Gathering errata.

At Press

Wraith 20th – New cover proof approved. Everything else is printing.

Wraith 20 Screen – Printed.

Scion Dice – At Studio2.

Lost 2e Screen – Shipping to shipper.

Scion Screen – Shipping to shipper.

Changeling: The Lost 2e – Going out to backers. PoD proof ordered.

Fetch Quest – Manufacturing continuing.

PtC Tormented – ON SALE this Wednesday on DTRPG!

TODAY’S REASON TO CELEBRATE: 

Happy New Year! May 2019 be better than 2018 for all of you in every way!

[koalataeil]

Basketball Player!Jackson (High School)

Grade: Junior

Position: Starting Power Forward

Skills: Rebounding, aggressiveness

jackson is vvvv well known around school

like everyone knows who he is

they’re either friends with him or have friends that are friends with him

and everyone knows how much he loves basketball

it’s his sole focus mainly

he’s always working hard to become a better player or teammate

especially in the offseason

always forcing teammates to practice something with him

but all his hard work is paying off

he is likely to be the captain next year after yoongi graduates

he is looking to play basketball in a college that’ll take him

even if no colleges want him, he’ll train even harder and be a walk-on

he’s improved a lot since his freshman year

back when he wasn’t confident and made lots of mistakes

he HATES if anyone brings up games from freshman year or pulls up old film

like he’s so embarrassed by it all

but he remembers that’s why he works so hard now, to be the best player he can possibly be

he’s best known for his rebounding

like he holds the school’s record for most rebounds in a season

and he’s trying to beat his own record every year

which he totally does

until his aggression gets the best of him

bc he is also well known for his fouling

he has fouled out of SOOO many games

he also has gotten kicked out of like three games because he started yelling at refs or picked fights with other players

he usually scares the jv team and the audience when he gets that angry

but most of the time the refs just ignore him unless he really gets out of hand

he’s just very passionate about basketball

you actually know about Jackson bc you work on the yearbook and see TONS of pictures of him going up for a rebound or being on defense

like the other people with the yearbook love to take pictures of him, and you have to sort through them all

and you admit that he is pretty good looking and seems to be good at basketball

but you don’t focus much attention on him

one day, the person who was in charge of taking photographs for the game that night got really sick

and as the editor, you had to fill in for them

so you get to the game early and start taking pictures of the team warming up and shooting around

you try to get all the players included in some of the pictures,, even jeno

but for some reason you keep getting photos focused on Jackson

once the game starts, you move around to different places around the court to find good angles and photo opportunities

you get some really great pictures by the time half-time comes

so you decide to pack up your camera, and as you’re getting ready to leave, youngjae stops you and tells you to sit and watch the rest of the game

and he doesn’t take no for an answer

so you sit with youngjae and talk until the last half of the game starts

and the game is quite close and very intense

you’re surrounded with cheering students getting really into the game

which kind of surprises you a little but it’s great energy and you get into it a little as well

and during the last couple of minutes in the game

jackson gets his fifth and last foul over something he didn’t even do

he gets frustrated as he stomps his way to the end of the bench and dries himself off with a towel

he’s mumbling stuff to himself and eventually the coach has to try and calm him down a little but he gets more frustrated

he throws the towel down and yells something to jaehyun who’s sitting on the bench

everyone’s attention is on Jackson as people are wondering if he was going to get kicked out or not

but some of his teammates on the bench calm him down after a minute and the focus returns to the game

the team ended up winning by a single basket luckily

and the energy was still very high

you smiled and thanked youngjae for making you stay and watch the game

and then you left to go home and work on editing some of the photos

during the next yearbook meeting, someone suggested getting quotes or advice from players or members of certain teams or clubs to put into the yearbook

and everyone agreed

so you were put in charge of reorganizing some of the pages to make room for quotes within the spread while everyone else figured out who was going to get the quotes and stuff for each club/team

and you were given the boys basketball team with the strong suggestion to get it from Jackson, especially after that recent game he’d fouled out on

so you go along with it, finishing the spread for the boys basketball team with space to add more pictures and stats from upcoming games

and during your free period the next day, you go to the front office to find out where Jackson is

and he’s in his gym class

so you go to the gym to see him playing dodgeball with the rest of his class

trying your best to avoid getting hit by a ball, you make your way to the teacher to tell him you needed to talk to Jackson

the teacher blows his whistle and calls Jackson name

and he’s originally confused and trying to defend himself saying he didn’t throw that ball that hit hoseok’s face

but he totally did

but then he sees you and he’s even more confused

bc he’s seen you around and taking pictures at games and stuff

but he has no idea why you need him but he walks over to you anyway

you lead Jackson out of the gym and into a nearby hallway and sit on the ground, with your back to some lockers

jackson just looks down at you wanting some sort of explanation

so you explain it to him and ask him to sit down

and he gives you some super cheesy advice about not giving up and working harder

and it’s very jackson

you ask him which picture he wants to go next to his quote and show him a bunch of the pictures that came out the best of him

and he takes your laptop and looks through all the pictures carefully

“did you take all of these” he asks all of a sudden

and you’re like “ummm no why?”

“no reason”

and he settles on one from the game you went to of him focusing on getting a rebound

“you took this one right?”

you nod, confused on why that mattered

“I like this one. do you have other pictures that you took though?”

you look at him, trying to understand why he was asking about them and nod anyway

you take your laptop back and open up the file of unedited pictures taken from that last game

and he looks at all of them without saying anything but he’s smiling

“you’re a great photographer. and I see you like taking pictures of me” he winks at you

and you blush so quickly

and he just laughs “you wanna hang out sometime? maybe show me some other pictures you’ve taken?” 

you nod before the gym teacher yells from the gym that Jackson needed to come back before he failed for that day

he gets up and runs back to the gym leaving you just sitting there staring at a picture of Jackson and youjin both going up for a rebound

a couple days pass and you’re just sitting at lunch and sorting through some pictures another person from yearbook gave you from the girls basketball game the night before

and jackson pulls up a chair and sits right next to you and watches you work until you stop and ask if he’s enjoying himself but he doesn’t respond, just motions for you to finish

and once you’re done he smiles and asks when you wanted to hang out

you guys set up a time and it’s just a very chill time

he takes you out to eat and then you show him what you were currently working on with the yearbook because he’s so interested in it for whatever reason

and that’s how all of your dates continue until eventually you guys make it official

and the whole yearbook team finds out and forces you to take all the pictures for the boys basketball team bc you’ll already be at the games

so you go to every home game and close away game, camera in hand, and take pictures of the whole team

but you always take more pictures of Jackson

especially because when he’s on the bench, he’ll be doing stupid poses to get your attention 

until he gets caught by the coach who yells at him

and after each game Jackson comes up to you and gives you a big sweaty hug and begs you to let him look through the pictures

and you say no because you don’t want to be the last ones in the gym

so he comes with you to your house

and you hang out while he looks through your pictures with a smile on his face and the occasional laugh because a teammate had a weird face or he was laughing at himself

anyway your relationship is very lighthearted and chill

until you witness a time when Jackson gets ejected from a game

and you have to deal with his anger and try and calm him down

he just gets so frustrated but you calm him down pretty quickly by letting him talk it out

and he really appreciates you helping him even though he knows how irrational he can be sometimes especially when it comes to bad refs

you too are just very cute honestly

[thehudsonator]

MAKE A MOVE & MAKE IT NOW || Hudrose

TAGGING: @acupmarley @thehudsonator

DATE: Tuesday March 13th.  

PLACE:  A Cup

NOTES: Fiona and Marley find themselves stuck in the A Cup supply closet.   In the dim cramped space, Fiona finds the nerve to do something she’s wanted for a long time.  

MARLEY ROSE

At the request of an Acup patron for more sugar packets, Marley, of course, was determined to fulfill her job as runner and head into the supply closet. Once she was there, she left the door ajar behind her and began staring at the shelves. Goodness, she needed to make a promise to herself to reorganize these kinds of things during a slow period, or when she was on shift with someone else so that she could leave the counter. As she sat down on the floor, Marley blinked up as the lightbulb in the room suddenly dimmed, drenching the tiny closet in a dark haze. Any normal or sane person would have left, but how could Marley leave this customer without the Sugar in the Raw? Sighing, she began fumbling her way through the almost-pitch, feeling around for the box she needed.

FIONA HUDSON

Naturally the first face Fiona searched for once she walked through the doors of A Cup was Marley's.  Instead of jumping into line when she didn’t see the other girl she stepped aside to go into the bathroom, to make sure she looked okay.  Since when was that a thing she did?  Anyway, Fiona pulled her phone out of the pocket typing out a quick text to Kate as she pushed through the door she thought was the bathroom.  Nope, she overshot it and found herself in the supply closet.  “Oh hey,” she smiled when she saw Marley the door closing with a click behind her.  “What would you say if I told you I got lost going to the bathroom in the coffee shop I go to every day?”(edited)

MARLEY ROSE

Suddenly, a voice rang out in the door in front of them-- "Marley, how many times do I have to tell you to lock the door behind you?" -- and it was with a sudden jolt of adrenaline that Marley realized that she. In very, very tiny closet space. With Fiona. "Oh, hi!" Marley squeaked, her voice immediately jumping several octaves. "It's-- uh-- well-- I think we're... I think we're locked in here, actually..." Marley bit down on her lower lip as she realized that, as per Acup rules, she didn't have her phone on her. "You don't have your phone on you, do you? To text someone to get the door, or something?"

FIONA HUDSON

Fiona’s eyes widened as she pressed on the supply closet door while jiggling the handle.  Marley was right, they were now locked in the very confined space of the closet.  She swallowed thickly aware of the fact that if Marley got onto her feet there wouldn’t be much space between them at all.  She held up the phone still in her hand as if it were the key to solve their problem.  “I’ll send out an SOS to Kate,” she nodded, knowing she would be in need of a caffeine fix soon.  “I’ll try calling up front too,” she suggested as she rang the coffee shop’s direct line.  With every ring it felt like time was dragging forward, and ultimately she recieved no answer.  It made sense since the shop seemed to be picking up, but this was kinda an emergency right?  Unsure who would come to their rescue first, Fiona sat on the ground next to Marley, pulling her legs up to her chest.  “Sorry for getting us locked in here like this,” she apologized, with an embarrassed scrunch of her nose.  “I’ll keep calling.  Somebody’s gotta answer eventually right?”

MARLEY ROSE

“Yes! Yes definitely.” Marley nodded, as she turned to face as much of Fiona that she could see.  “I’m sure everything will be fine. I mean, someone eventually is going to need something from the supply closet, or be looking for me, right? I mean, I can’t stay off shift for too long...” She nibbled on her lower lip. “You’re not claustrophobic or anything, are you? I know the space is, uh, tiny... and you’re very tall.” With long legs like a model, but Marley wasn’t going to mention that. “I wish I could remember April’s cell number.”

FIONA HUDSON

Fiona’s phone buzzed and she quickly tapped open the message from Kate hoping she would be able to come to their rescue.  No such luck, the response from her sister was just three kissy face emojis.  “Uh, looks like Kate is off duty as a superhero today, she’s not gonna be able to get us out of here.  Our fate is in the hands of your fellow baristas,” she chuckled.  Here Fiona was the one to get them into this situation and Marley was still wanting to make sure she was okay, it was the little things like that which made the warmth she felt for the other girl swell.  “Don’t worry about me.  I’m good,” she nodded, signature lopsided grin included.  “Plus, there are worse people to be trapped in a supply closet with.  In terms of company this is pretty tops,” her hand fell to her side, and her fingers grazed Marley’s.  She didn’t make an immediate move to pull away, they were in a pretty confined space, so the options for her hands were either in her lap, or at her sides, and she much preferred the gentle contact.

MARLEY ROSE 

“Oh no!” Marley shook her head, but that wasn’t really what she meant. Part of her was secretly glad to be in a room with Fiona, even if she was slightly worried about an escape. “Well, I’m sure someone will be in here soon. I know I’m in the supply closet at least six times a shift.” She glanced down, unable to see Fiona’s fingers brush against her own. Marley reached over and gently took her hand, squeezing it. “I’m really sorry, do you still need to use the bathroom? I can see if I can pick the lock...”

FIONA HUDSON

Marley’s hand was in hers and it was enough to pull Fiona’s focus from the situation, she couldn’t help but notice how soft the girl’s hands were despite being a hardworking musician.   That would be a weird thing to mention though, right?  Yeah, probably.  As Marley mentioned the bathroom her brows furrowed in confusion until she remembered she was only headed there to make sure she looked semi decent.  “I actually didn’t need to… I just…” she trailed off as the second part of Marley’s statement really sunk in.  “Is lock picking a secret talent of yours?”  She teased with a chuckle.  “Tell me something else I don’t know about you,” she suggested trying to distract from the fact nobody had found them yet.

MARLEY ROSE

"Oh, good," Marley breathed a sigh of relief as she slumped against the shelves in the supply closet, slowly running her free hand through her hair. "That would be massively uncomfortable, probably." She hummed for a moment, softly under her breath. "Something you don't know about me?" Marley asked, pondering the question for a moment. She tried to live her life as an open book, or at the very least, she tried to always tell the truth and not keep secrets from the people she cared about. "Um... Well, when I was little, I really wanted to play the flute. It was right around the time that my dad left-- sorry, I don't mean for that to be like, a dramatic thing, but we couldn't afford to rent one. My dad played guitar for about two months and left it behind, so my mom just gave it to me. I still have it, but it's covered in stickers so I don't think of it as something that he's touched. If that makes any sense, which it probably doesn't."

FIONA HUDSON

Fiona was expecting a small fact, maybe she likes pancakes over waffles, or maybe she’d give up her desert island album picks, instead she got a crystal clear glimpse into her young life.  Fiona gave her hand another squeeze, wanting Marley to know she could speak freely.  Fiona doesn’t consider herself a musician, she loves playing the drums, but she never really considered that a career path past middle school.  Still, the fact Marley’s close relationship to music so closely mirrored her own, made it feel like her heard had grown three sizes.  “Makes total sense,” she nodded.  Fiona stretched her legs the best she could in the confined space.  “I only drum because I liked playing around with my dads old records,” she admitted.  “I remember making drum kits out of random junk around the house: pots, pans, buckets— then one day my mom brought one home from a garage sale, and I picked it up from there.  Well after many hours sitting between my dad’s old turntable and my drums,” she chuckled, at the memory realizing she didn’t hadn’t thought about it in a long time.  “Did you ever pick up the flute?”

MARLEY ROSE 

Marley briefly wondered if, perhaps, this was too much to reveal too soon, but she also figured out very quickly that Fiona was just as open, if not more so than she was. "Sorry, I know that was kind of heavy. I'm happy for it, though. It made me who I am! And no, I never got to pick up the flute, but from what my friends said about playing in band, I think I was better off in chorus anyway." Carefully, she listened to Fiona's own childhood memories. "I'm going to have to recruit you, yeah? I can get one of those box drums that you sit on, and you can play sets with me. We could be another Teagan and Sara, if you want." She was kidding, but only sort of. Marley wasn't so ashamed at how she was trying to hang out with Fiona. "Your turn. Tell me something nobody else knows about you."March 13, 2018

FIONA HUDSON

“It’s okay,” she assured as Marley apologized for the subject getting heavy.  “The A Cup storage closet is a safe space.  Did they not go over that in training?”  She joked wanting to assure Marley she hadn’t said too much.  Fiona nodded when she mentioned being in chorus that just made sense to her, “You do have an awesome singing voice— you know, just beautiful,” she fumbled.  Maybe it was the confined space making her nervous, maybe it was the fact that she had just admitted to herself she has feelings for the girl and now they were stuck behind closed doors.  The thought of playing music with Marley brought a smile to her face.  “Say the word and consider me recruited,” she nodded.  “I just brought my kit into the city, and right now it’s mostly just collecting dust in my room.”   Now it was her turn to share, but her mind had struggled moving onto anything that didn’t involve Marley.  Before she had a chance to weigh any potential consequence of what she was about to say the words were already tumbling from her mouth, “I’ve thought about kissing you since the first time you made me hot chocolate.”

MARLEY ROSE 

"Hmmmmm," Marley pretended to think about the question at hand, even though she was secretly pleased that she hadn't made Fiona uncomfortable with talking about her past. It wasn't too off the beaten track, as Marley wrote a lot about her own insecurities in her songs, but it was one thing to imply with beautiful wordplay and another to flat out tell another living soul about her issues. "I guess I must have daydreamed during that part of basic Acup training," She angled her body to face Fiona, or at least, as little of Fiona as she could see in the moonlight. "Hey, now there's a thought!" She beamed, trying to contain her excitement. "I've been working on this one song-- totally a cappella, yes, but I thought it would be cool to add in drums to a certain part to mimic a heartbeat. If you wanted to experiment on it with me, I would be totally in your debt. Like, please take my first born and my soul kind of debt." As Fiona revealed her own secret, Marley's eyes bugged open wide. "I'm sorry-- I definitely just hallucinated. Do you think there's some kind of cleaner bottle open in here? What did you say, again?"

FIONA HUDSON

Marley was now facing her and even in the dark supply closet, she could see her bright eyes reflected in the dull light.  Momentarily distracted it took her a moment to realize what Marley was suggesting.  “Are you kidding?  I’d be honored to drum for you.  When you make it big I can tell everybody I was there at the ground floor.  Keep your soul though, I’ll do this one for free,” she joked bumping her shoulder gently against the other girl’s.  Marley’s surprise was warranted and Fiona was caught between backtracking, and going for broke.  If she leaned in and Marley rejected her getting out of the supply closet would no longer be a problem since she’d melt into a puddle on the floor, so she went for it.  With Marley’s body angled towards hers it was easy to close some of the distance between them.  “I’ve thought about doing this,” she started, eyes flickering to Marley’s lips, “for a really long time.”  The rest of the distance was closed between them, Fiona’s hand found Marley’s cheek as their lips brushed together.

MARLEY ROSE 

"Oh, I don't know about making it big, silly," Marley tried to brush the compliment aside with a wave of her hand. "You know, it's really hard for me to even think about that while I'm still in school. I'm so focused on writing and getting everything done in time that I can never see the forest for the trees." She nodded eagerly at Fiona's acceptance to her request, and couldn't believe her good luck. First, Jessi was going to sing her soundtrack, now Fiona was going to play drums for her? Well, this day couldn't get much better. Or at least, Marley didn't think it could until she felt Fiona's lips brush softly against her own. Marley made one soft sound of surprise before her eyes immediately fluttered shut, and she froze in place. Could this really be happening? Was there such a thing as a kiss that warmed her from her head to her toes? In a moment of bravery, Marley wrapped her arms around Fiona's shoulders, pulling her in even closer.

FIONA HUDSON 

“That’s ‘cause you’re as smart as you are modest,” she nodded.  “I’d bet on you though.  Just shoot me a text when you need some drums, and I’m there.” As Fiona’s lips brushed against Marley’s she was momentarily frozen in fear that she made the wrong move, then Marley’s arms were wrapped around her shoulders drawing her closer, and Fiona’s only regret was not doing this sooner.  She broke the kiss but made no move to pull away, hoping for the courage to kiss her again.  “If you didn’t like that we can totally blame the open bottle of cleaner,” she chuckled.

MARLEY ROSE 

"I'm-- not that smart," Marley shook her head, biting down on her lower lip. Sure, she was wonderful at her major, but when it came to anything else? She was horribly naive and extremely gullible. When Fiona pulled away, Marley took a moment to catch her breath, but then immediately leaned her head on Fiona's shoulder, wrapping her arm around her waist. "I'm still going to need something that's telling me I'm not hallucinating. Although, please don't sucker punch me. Maybe a pinch?"

FIONA HUDSON

Fiona was still getting to know Marley beyond the context of just seeing her every morning for her daily dose of caffeine, but she knew one thing: the girl was smart.  Fiona had quickly learned there was no cut and dry way to show intelligence.  Just ‘cause Marley wasn’t studying to be an engineer or a scientist or whatever, it didn’t mean she wasn’t smart.  She was smart enough to remain kind in an unfair world, and that made her like almost nobody else Fiona had ever met.  Marley’s head was on her shoulder and an arm around her waist, and for a moment Fiona forgot how they wound up in the supply closet in the first place.  Fiona dipped two fingers beneath Marley’s chin tilting her head up, so she could connect their lips again.  This time less tentative, she wanted Marley to feel every time Fiona ever daydreamed about this moment in the kiss.  “Still feel like you’re hallucinating?  ‘Cause I can just keep doing this until you believe it,” she smirked.March 14, 2018

MARLEY ROSE 

"No, no, this is definitely real..." Marley's voice was breathless, and barely above a whisper. "I mean... um, yes I'm hallucinating, we should definitely keep--" and she was about to lean in before the door burst open, with April herself. Marley immediately shot up, and hit her head on one of the shelves. "Oh my god, ow," She rubbed the top of her head. "Miss Marley, I am not paying you for hanky panky," April placed a hand in the doorway, but she was smiling. "Back to the counter with you. I'm leaving this unlocked,  so run along now." Somewhat mortified, Marley emerged from the supply closet and dusted off her apron, hoping she hadn't just made a complete fool of herself. "Uh! So! I'll see you around? I guess? For coffee? I mean, not for coffee, but you usually get coffee here-- not that I'm saying you need to get coffee here, I just mean--" Marley stopped, took a deep breath, and nearly stamped her foot. "I'll see you the next time you come in!" And with that, she turned on her heel, and fled to the counter.

FIONA HUDSON

Fiona was leaning in to meet Marley in the middle and of course it was just then that April entered the supply closet.  She was sure the older woman could see the embarrassed flush that tinted her cheeks even in the dim lighting.  Fiona followed Marley out, not daring to make eye contact with anybody sitting at the surrounding tables.  Did anybody even notice Fiona entering the supply closet moments after Marley, and then them emerging together?  The rumor mill works in mysterious ways.  “I’ll see you tomorrow,” Fiona assured knowing she wouldn’t start her morning any other way.  Fiona mouthed an apology to April as she left the coffee shop, with a grin plastered on her face that would be there the whole way home.

[raisingsupergirl]

The Literal Literary Hermit

I often hear that "the world" says we can't do things. We can't follow our dreams. Or we can't be who we want to be. And on the surface, this sounds pretty profound. But I did something this last week that reminded me that the world is a pretty big freakin' place, and most of the time it's our own mind telling us that we can't do something. And you know what that is? It's an excuse. It's an excuse to avoid hard work, a little bit of planning, and the possibility of failure. But let's rewind. My revelation started in a hole in the ground.

In fact, I'm sitting here, right now, looking out the window of my 200-square-foot hermitage, watching ice chunks flow by in the Mississippi river. I've been here for five days, and other than calls home to my wife and daughters twice each day, I've had two conversations since I've been here. And both of them lasted less than two minutes. So, why am I here? What have I been doing? And what have I learned. Well, to answer those questions, I need to go back just a little bit farther.

First, you need to know that I'm thirty-two years old, I'm a full-time physical therapist, I have a lovely extroverted wife and two "lively" daughters (one and four years old), I'm the owner and editor-in-chief of a fiction magazine (shameless plug alert: GoHavok.com), and I've been writing fiction novels for almost a decade now. I'm also a Christian and a Freemason, and I, unlike my family, am not an extrovert. But the thing to take away from all of this is that I'm a writer. I've written seven novels (four independently and three collaboratively). And yet, I've never published anything over 1,000 words. Why?

Well, the short answer is that I haven't yet written anything that a big publisher has considered "sellable." Sure, I've had some hits from smaller publishers, and I could self-publish like your cousin's friend, but, for me, there's just something in my soul that needs that first book to be read by more than twelve people, and it’s worth the wait... mostly (and to be clear, I know plenty of writers who have done extremely well indie/self-publishing, and I know others who don’t have any desire to sell tens of thousands of copies as long as their family and friends can enjoy what they’ve written. I give both groups due credit and respect. But I’m not them). The problem is, statistically, most authors sell their first book in their early thirties (remember that I'm thirty-two). And I'm starting to realize this is because, by the time someone hits their thirties, they've pretty much settled into who they're going to be. And with each passing year, it gets harder for me to justify "wasting" time on stories that nobody's going to read. So, we finally come to the inciting event of the first act—the point of no return.

I wrote a book in November 2017. I thought it was great. Relatable characters, exciting plot, inspiring message, an out-of-this-world setting. But, apparently, it was a mess. Yes, it received positive feedback on a number of levels, but in the end, it needed a lot of work. And I was heartbroken because this was the novel to make or break me. If it didn't force the stars to align, I just couldn't make myself commit to another 200-hour paperweight. So what did I do? I sat it aside for a year and let it build into a source of anxiety and frustration. Every time I thought about it, it made me mad. Why? Because I knew it had huge potential. I knew I had the talent to make it shine. But I just. Didn’t. Have. The. Time. Until a friend of mine told me about a place called Visions of Peace Hermitages.

$40/night or $200/week. Forty minutes from my house. Seven hermitages (literally dug into the earth) overlooking the Mississippi river. No internet. No TV. No YouFaced TwitterSnapstagram. In short, no distractions. And suddenly, I knew my novel had a chance. Just one more hurdle to overcome—convince my wife to be a single parent for six days while I kicked back and followed my dream. Turns out, she's amazing. Not one single word of protest came out of her mouth. Apparently we'd been together long enough for her to finally understand my passion, even if she didn't understand my stories.

So, for a total of $300 ($200 for the hermitage and $100 for the food) and 40 hours of paid time off from work, I set out on a Sunday and made one last run at the thing that I'd literally dreamed about all of my adult life. I was going to re-tell the novel written on my heart. And here's what happened…

Day 1 (Sunday): Snow-covered highways and single-digit temperatures brought me to my fortress of solitude. I arrived optimistic and more than a little nervous. I spent the first few hours unpacking, organizing, reorganizing, and generally "settling in." I spent some time in prayer and some more time walking the grounds to take pictures and familiarize myself with my surroundings. And then, unable to contain my excitement, I sat down to the first chapter. I wrote and edited for four hours that first day, then made myself a simple dinner, read a little Walden, and turned in at 10:30, determined to get a good night's rest before my first full day. Unfortunately, I tossed and turned all stinking night. For a hole in the ground, that place had more noises than a haunted mansion. I really don't know how it sounded like people were walking around upstairs and playing music next door. There was literally no upstairs or next door. The bed was hard and small, three space heaters on full blast weren't enough to keep me from freezing, and my mind would not stop. And did I mention that there were train tracks 200 yards away from my front door, or that the barges on the Mississippi don't shut down at night? Yeah, not a great start. 

Day 2: I awoke at 6:30am, made a cup of coffee, a PB&J sandwich (team crunchy, hoorah), some strawberries, and a glass of OJ, and then watched the sun rise over the river. Well, I watched the sun rise through a veil of clouds over the river. But despite the overcast conditions, a fresh bed of snow had fallen, painting a breathtaking backdrop for me to write my Great American Novel. And I spent the next eleven-ish hours doing just that. Writing. Again, a small lunch and dinner, short calls home at 12:30pm and 7:30pm as scheduled, but no Walden. I was in it to win it. Another hour of writing before bed, and it was lights out again by 10:30. Then, another bad night of sleep. My skin was dry and itchy due to the space heaters.

Day 3: 6:30 wake-up. Yummy breakfast (PB/honey/banana sandwich, OJ, coffee), another cloudy sunrise, calls home at the same scheduled times, simple lunch and dinner, and another successful day of writing. I was getting in a serious groove, and all my romanticized notions of afternoon jogs and evening musings were now just distractions that I didn't have time for. Before bed, I boiled water on the stove, which seemed to help the dry air, and thus my itchiness. I slept a little better, but still not great.

Day 4 (Wednesday): THERE'S A REASON PEOPLE CALL IT HUMP DAY. 7:00 wake-up due to sleeping poorly the past few nights, cloudy sunrise, banana/OJ/coffee. No lunch (pistachios and strawberries at some point in the day) and a simple dinner. Calls home at 12:30 and 7:30 as always. I barely got through half the chapters I'd planned. Overall, very bogged down and feeling like this was a mistake even though the work I'd done so far was better than I'd hoped for. In bed by 10pm, and lo-and-behold, I slept BETTER! My brain shut off, I stayed warm, and I slept through most of the night. Hallelujah!

Day 5: What a day. A bright, clear sunrise over the mighty Mississippi. A quick banana/OJ/coffee breakfast while I started in on the day's writing. Another snack lunch and quick family call at 12:30 because I was on such a roll, and I made up for my lack of productivity the day before and then some. I called home at the scheduled 7:30 time to celebrate my news with the family and… nobody answered. I called literally six more times over the next ten minutes. Nothing. My wife knew the scheduled time and she didn't care. She didn't care about me. She didn't care that I was gone. She didn't care if I ever came back. And when she FINALLY called me back FIFTEEN minutes later, she said she didn't realize that it had gotten that late. And she didn't even feel bad that she'd made me wait FIFTEEN minutes! She didn't care! So, obviously, being confined away from one's family in a 200-square-foot hermitage does weird things to a person's mind, which resulted in a less than encouraging phone call. But hey, other than that, a great day.

Day 6: Did I mention that being secluded for prolonged periods does weird things to a person? Well, I rewarded my previous productivity by again sleeping in to seven, and another crystal clear sunrise pulled me from a deep, restful slumber. And then I saw my first sign of life for several days—a little ladybug crawling across the ceiling over my bed. "Hallooo, lady bug!" I said as I wiped the sleep from my eyes. "Or are ye a MANbug?" And I proceeded to have a five-minute conversation with the little guy in an Irish accent. I mean, the ladybug didn't have an Irish accent. Just me. And I resolved at that moment to watch Braveheart and Brave when I got home because the accent had so inspired me that morning. I could do it! Just a handful of chapters left. Let's go!

And then at 1:58 pm, I finished my novel. I could write another blog post on the supreme sense of victory that finishing a novel evokes, but let me just briefly say, "YAAAAHOOOOOOO!" and be done with it. I then spent the rest of the afternoon walking down by the river and FINALLY appreciating the quiet magic of that place devoted to God's majesty ("Be still and know that I am God."). Though, I will say that after a week of creating an alternate reality in my head, I found it impossible to turn off the narrative. I constantly found myself creating conversations, describing poetic scenes, and outlining plots based on everything I saw during my walk. Kind of annoying, really ("You never want to cross the Muddy in the shallow places. The undertow will pull you right under. No, find the deepest spot and paddle like your life depends on it, because it does.").

So here I am, on the evening of day six, writing this blog because when I go home tomorrow, there's NO WAY I'm going to be on my computer. I'm going to cuddle with my family until I squeeze their eyeballs out. But before I wrap things up, let me just share a few final thoughts that I jotted down during my stay here.

1) My location truly was amazing. I've never been somewhere simultaneously so secluded and connected. With trains and barges gliding by at regular intervals, I was constantly reminded of the outside world without being distracted by it. I was a silent observer. It was an introvert's dream.

2) The body isn't meant to be sedentary. I wrote for eleven to twelve hours per day for five days straight. That's around sixty hours, most of which was spent either sitting or lying down, usually in five-hour intervals without changing position. Even with brief sessions of stretching, pushups, etc. each day, my body was absolutely wrecked (anybody know a good physical therapist?). In case you didn't notice, my appetite dwindled, as did my waistline, but I also lost muscle mass, my digestive system was an absolute disaster, and when I went for a walk on that last day, I almost passed out from the sheer lack of cardiovascular health. There IS a reason professional writers only write four to five hours per day. Trust me.

3) What I did was NOT sustainable. Aside from my physical health, my mental health suffered as well. In case you didn't notice, I started having conversations with bugs and getting mad at my wife for being fifteen minutes late to a phone call. And in the latter half of the week, all I wanted to do was quit. I enjoyed the story I was living in, but nothing about it was "fun." It was a constant struggle to keep engaged, and at times, the only thing that kept me going was the promise of deer chili and a Bulleit old fashioned, with which I plan to reward myself right after I finish this blog.

4) I did a lot of counting. Maybe it had something to do with my mild OCD or my seclusion, or maybe it was a coping mechanism to keep myself on track, but I broke down everything possible into fractions and percentages. Half way through the braunschweiger on day two? I'd better slow down. Averaging 2,000 words/hour for the first two days? That means I should finish on time if I write ten hours per day for the next three days. I did more measuring and math in those five days than I'm comfortable admitting. 

5) I had everything I needed in those 200 square feet… I think. Like I said, I was only there for a week, but I totally see how those tiny house minimalists make it work. Less to clean. Less to keep track of. More appreciation for what you do have. Then again, I'm not sure I could have fit on that twin bed with my wife and two daughters.

6) I missed a lot of opportunities, but it's okay. As I said, this place is amazing. I could have spent a week just walking the grounds, enjoying the sunrise, and generally observing the VOP Hermitage's "rule" on the plaque that was hanging in the chapel—"Listen well and produce nothing." The problem was, I had come here to produce. And that's what I did. This place can be used for many things, and I plan to come back again.

7) I may not be an extrovert, but man, I miss my family. I really do. There's not a lot more to say about that. I appreciate them. I appreciate their energy. I appreciate the fact that they love me. I appreciate the fact that my wife allowed this whole life-changing retreat happen. And I can't wait to see them.

 8) My book is done. I'll send it off to beta-readers one more time. I'll make some adjustments based on their feedback. And then my agent will send it off to publishers. And I'll wait. I don't know what will happen, and that's okay. I edited 80,000 words and wrote 20,000 more over the last five days, and I also grew a lot through the experience. Even if this book doesn't work out, I'm not sure if I'll give up on the dream. Maybe I will, and maybe I won't. Or maybe that dream will just look different than it did before. I don't know. But as my main character says in the final lines of my novel (and I'm paraphrasing because copyright/first rights laws): "A lot of things make a person. And in some ways, nothing does. We are who we are, yesterday, today, and forever. It's simple, really. Live life and regret nothing."

[everyweekforayear]

BttF: SD Cont.

STATUS SO FAR:

Day 1: Since it's been a while, I gathered my latest script and notes and spent time reviewing the last direction and plans I was working on. Not time for much else with the busy family weekend. Creative Time: 20mins in the late evening.

Day 2: I tried to build on those plans from yesterday. I managed to work a little during a short lunch window.  My focus was going through the step by step outline for building a script that I created for myself. I finally check a few steps off. I finished the notes section and step 0, but I previously kept hitting a wall during the end of step 1. I got through that today, which I think will help me get through this wall I've been hitting.

Creative Time: 25mins, during lunch

Day 3: Now that I've finally found my go-to work spaces during lunch near my new day job, I feel like I can focus on script. I wrote a big chunk of notes and checked off the boxes for steps 2 and 3. I need to finish about 47 steps before I will be done the script draft but I'll keep noting where I am. The outline forces me to constantly reevaluate what the most important elements of the script and to test a few different avenues of outlines. Right now, I've divided the script into 8 sequences and then once I get through a few different iterations of that process, I will break those each into at least 8 new scenes. This will get me to roughly 64 scenes by the end of this project, with a speed draft done. By doing things like this, I realized that certain sequences didn't have enough conflict or I added conflict to areas where I hadn't thought of it. And overall, this script building outline is always through the lense of the original story. I also think that once I get to the point of having a speed draft, I'm pretty good at the editing and reorganizing part of the writing process.  

Creative Time: 50mins, during lunch

Day 4: I've been having fun diving into this script segments. I've spend so much time in the past writing out full sections and abandoning them, so I can appreciate the benefits of revisions in very short outline form before diving too far into any one thing. I know I will make changes later too but I think this helps me see which scenes make the most sense in advance. I once again recommend the coffee break screenwriter by Pilar Alessandro. I've taken her revision and reworking ideas and put most of them as well as some of my own goals to create the checklist I mentioned in the last post. Its been helpful. I completed steps 4, 5, and 6 today. Each early step is a a rewrite with a specific concept or purpose in mind. My favorite revelation(s) from these steps was a unforeseen conflict in which a plate of food because the enemy and the object of desire at the same time.

Creative Time: 45mins, during lunch break; 30mins, late at night

Day 5: I zoomed through step 7. Step 7 was the first step where you go through the story outline from the perspective of the antagonist or supporting character. I found it hard to focus on all those characters at once, so I broke out step 7 in a few parts, 71, 7b, 7c, etc. for the main antagonist as well as supporting characters and even season characters that may not have a huge presence now but will come into play later. My favorite revelation(s) from this step was that I found a physical moment in the story for Simo and his son Cal to have a conversation about Cals mother, who is not in the picture. I knew I wanted that seen but it felt out of place in many places I was trying to put it.  I realized that Simo and Cal have a scene in DC and that the car ride there would be a solid uninterrupted moment for a personal, if not a bit awkward, conversation

Creative Time: 20mins, before work; 50mins, during my lunch break, 20mins, after work

Day 6: Got through steps 8-11. I enjoyed most of these steps but realized that I had a hard time with the structural rewrite step. I feel like the genera order of events is pretty good the way I'm imagining and moving things around doesn't feel right. This is one of those steps that is hard to understand in outline form. I think its one of those steps that will be easier when I at least have the scene outlines, because I will have more material and it will be easier to mix things up and move them around.

Creative Time: 45mins, during lunch

Day 7: I made it to the scene outline. This is not the speed draft writing, but it is the outline of the 8 or more scenes I envision that need to happen in each sequence. This is where I am going back to my original notes as well as my rewrite notes and trying to find the right scenes for each sequence, starting with Act 1a. I found that while I thought I had an idea that was big enough to fill the first half of act 1, I'm struggling to fill in some gaps. I've been making this notes all over a printout and I may need to take the time to transfer them back to my computer because I have some things I need to see more cleanly and other formatting things that are easier to do on a computer.

Creative Time: 30mins, during nap time.

CONCEPT UPDATES/CHANGES: I feel good about where things are headed. Still not so sure about how long this will take but I'm pushing now. I haven't had a week at or above 7 hours, so I would really like to step that up and I think I need to if I want to actually finish this thing.

PICTURES/NOTES: Pics of script notes TBD.

THIS WEEK RUNNING TIME: 5.58 hours

TOTAL RUNNING TIME(SO FAR): 16.83 hours

[becausehiships]

No Mystical Design - Chapter 11

Note:  it's almost 6 months without her. it took me 5 months to read through our google chat. i'll start organizing everything we ever wrote and edit it out of typos and start posting. i'm sorry it's taken so long; grief is fucking awful.

this one is a stupid little one we wrote right when glee ended.  they get much better as time goes on... i promise to organize everything and get it posted.

the one that happens when Darren gets a case of nostalgia.

Masterpost | AO3

Darren has the biggest, baddest, most powerful iPhone money could buy.  So when a notification pops up to let him know that he’s nearly out of space, he scoffs loudly in his empty apartment and sets to start a reorganization project between his iCloud and the phone immediately, since there is absolutely no point to having a four thousand megapixel camera on a cell phone if he can’t use it to capture every special moment.  It’s sunny and warm in the city; he should probably be outside.  But then he’d want to take pictures of how beautiful everything around him is and he can’t do that until he cleans out what’s simply not needed.  He plugs in and gets started.

As he’s watching the photos and videos flash across the screen within the import to his hard drive, it’s as though he’s watching a chronological movie of his whole life.  Every single moment that he once thought to be important enough to document reflects for a split second, glaring back at his reflection he sees against the sunlight of the window behind him.

Every person in every picture is familiar and a complete stranger, and holy shit they’ve all come so far since Darren’s start on the show.  Baby faces and grins, the billions of photos from hanging out on tour, selfies that weren’t classified as such yet on duck boats and in front of royal living quarters and decked out in pointed black hats in Salem, and later at sushi restaurants and Disneyland and whoever’s house.  Pictures of a baby-young Chris taking his first shot somewhere in the midwest, pictures of Ashley and Dianna posing in second-hand prom dresses they found in a vintage shop in Brooklyn, the Zurich sky, the Eiffel Tower.  Dublin.  A group photo dressed as Cheerios, Darren blowing out birthday candles with Chris grinning at him in the background before they were totally good again.  A video of Chris doing Single Ladies on tour.  Warbler rehearsal.

Darren leans back in his chair and covers his wet eyes with one hand.  He feels flushed and dizzy and all alone.  Cooper appears and sits beneath Chris’ desk, staring at him through the glass top.

“Okay, Coop.  I’ll take you in a minute.”

He navigates to his iTunes shamelessly and scrolls to the exact four minutes and fifty-seven seconds that he needs to hear right now.  He crosses the room and turns on the bluetooth stereo system on the top of their dresser.  He comes back to his computer and hits play.  Lea’s voice floods the apartment, and he sits underneath the desk with Cooper, hugging the only thing that will let him right now.  The dog grins and bears it, wagging his tail softly.  Man’s best friend.

Glee has given him so much opportunity, a chance at fateful and unconditional love, friends and lovers that have since turned into family.   Even if no one has really reached out to Chris or Darren since they found each other again, they all have a special bond that only those on the inside looking out will ever understand.  It’s a connection that will remain for the rest of their lives.

He loses it at more than trophies on a shelf because God, that’s so fucking true.  He wrote the damn song and he doesn’t realize the thing that he took away from the experience is the new shape of his career, his life, his heart.

Darren sobs in the midst of pushing Cooper off of his lap, the dog glaring back at him before stalking away to spitefully pee on the rug near the laundry room and Darren can’t bring himself to care.  Not now.

He lets the song fade out as he climbs in bed and hugs a pillow, crying silent flowing tears that stream down the bridge of his nose as they fall to their death.  Nearly three years to the day and it finally hits him.  He feels like such a douchebag for not getting emotional at any point before right this second.<br /> Those days were sacred and irreplaceable but most of all, over.

Shaking his head, he attempts to snap himself out of it once and for all.  It’s not fair that he’s crying about it when it’s old news; it’s not fair that he’s sad about any of it because he would trade it all in a million times if he could still wind up with Chris in the end.

He hears the door’s lock hitch; he hears footsteps in the foyer and a distinct, “Oh Coop!  What’d you do?  Dare?”

He doesn’t trust his voice so he waits until Chris can figure out the fact that he’s right around the corner.  Eventually, he’s welcomed by a tilted head and a very confused expression.

“What happened?”

Darren turns his neck to look at Chris.  “Glee’s really over.”

Chris looks startled and laughs but cuts himself off when Darren continues to stare, wet eyelashes and puffy red cheeks to boot.

“Oh, honey.  Did it just hit you?”  Chris rushes around the back of the couch and gathers Darren in his arms.

“I owe my whole life to that stupid show, Chris.  My whole life.”

“You would have found your career without Ryan Murphy.”

“Would I have found you?”

Chris lets out a larger than life sigh and curls his lips into the childish smirk Darren loves.  “I would have still been in Clovis without Glee.  I imagine I’d be the assistant manager of a Best Buy.  So no, probably not.”

Darren nods and kisses him, a brush of lips hardly enough to enunciate his gratitude for this perfect moment between the two of them.  “I love you so much, Colfer.”

He’s faced with a genuinely concerned, nervous look on Chris’ beautiful face.  “Dare…”

“Shhhh, just hold me.”

“That, I can do.”  Chris rubs a palm up and down Darren’s forearm, ignoring the fur babies to take care of his boyfriend.  “I love you.  But honestly, why did it just hit you?  How?  It’s been...”

Darren shrugs.  “I dunno.  Just looking at pictures.  Hey, what did you take from set?”

Chris giggles.  “Oh.  I don’t remember.”

“Shut up.  Of course you remember.”  Darren smiles and pats the couch under them.

“Fine.”  Chris combs through Darren’s curls and looks out into space as he thinks.  “I took… the hippo broach, a pair of pants from the last episode, Pavarotti’s bedazzled pencil box casket, because I actually spent time and effort on that. Oh, and I got you.”

“Me?”

“I took miniscule little things that, in the grand scheme of things, meant nothing.  Because the prize I got was so much better than your couch or Cory’s jersey, or Santana’s Cheerio skirt.”  Chris nuzzles Darren’s neck.  “What was the line?  We didn’t need to win any stupid show choir competition singing a break up song.  Because we won so much more than that.  What’s the line!”

Darren grins and straightens his posture, slipping into Blaine one last time.  “We did win.  We got each other out of this.  That’s better than any trophy, don’t you think?”

“I ask you to walk the dog once while I’m gone, maybe pick up some milk while you’re on your way home, and nothing.  But you can remember one measly line from like, your fourth episode ever.”

“Certain important things stick.  When I was memorizing that script, I saw so many… I thought about you a lot back then.”

“And now?”

“And now.”  Darren shrugs his way into a smirky little kiss that turns quickly into so much more.

[ivyplays]

Here is my Atelier collection. I loved it very much. But I’m no longer buying Atelier games. I’m very, very disappointed. The developers/publishers of my favorite series made a marketing decision that forces me to drop the series and probably put my collection somewhere under the sofa. Here is why.

Long text under “Keep Reading” (about niche games, about prices, about console industry and Steam).

This collection was my pride and joy until a week ago. I was collecting box versions of Atelier games since 2009. I became a fan of them when I played Mana Khemia on PS2, but back then I didn’t actually own any disks myself. When the series hit PS3, I became a valid paying customer for Gust. This developer never really lived up to my expectations, but I’ve always found something special about Atelier games - a unique charm. They’ve never looked up to date, and it’s really visible how low budget they are, but the 2D art is extremely pretty, the music is unbelievably good, and the alchemy system - the main reason why I like the series - is always superb with a remarcable twist in every new installment.

Every one of the games shown in the pictures were my presents. My boyfriend bought them to me for my birthdays, on valentines’ or other special occasions. It was a tradition. Every time when a new Atelier game came out and there was some special day for me to celebrate, I knew I would get it. I don’t like surprises. The feeling of knowing I will get a thing that I want excites me more. I’m also an adult of an age when I usually don’t expect presents at all - we skip buying presents for a lot of Holidays, because we don’t really need anything, and a sweater or a purse is not a present, it’s an everyday thing (we’re not rich at all, we’re just not focused on general shopping). So we ended up with a tradition. I get Atelier games, and we pay for them way more than they deserve, because it’s really hard to find niche boxed games in my country, even in the capital, so they are usually overpriced. Ordering a game by post is also troublesome and you can easily end up with nothing. So finding a new Atelier game was always a hard mission. It also made it special.

Now this tradition is over. My collection is complete. Maybe, just maybe, some time in the future I’ll find a box version of Mana Khemia for PS2 and add it to the collection, but that’s it. I’m not buying new Atelier games anymore. This is the largest sum of money we ever put into a game series, and that's it. I’d like to add that all those games we bought new, not long after release, with no discounts, usually overpriced. Two of them are Collector’s Editions (we couldn’t find the other games like this). When buying those, I always thought I was expressing my gratitude to the developer in the only way that’s possible for me - giving them money. I’ve never bothered to buy a lot of other good games, I usually wait till they are discounted, or even free on PS Plus. But the Atelier series was special for me. Not anymore. Now I’m very, very disappointed. I’m feeling down for a week now.

Here’s what happened:

It’s an Atelier Sophie game on Steam. It’s available already. And it costs about 9 dollars in my country. Not even full 9, just 8 and a half. I payed 60 bucks more for a PS4 version, and it happened only 4 months ago. I haven’t even finished this game yet. The game itself was released about half a year ago, so I wouldn’t be finished with it even if I bought the game a little earlier – for I play them slow. I was ultimately cheated. I don’t think I can find enough words to describe how I actually feel.

What I’m sure of is that I’m not buying console Atelier games anymore. PS4 architecture is a PC architecture basically, so it’s easy to port games. It’s a known fact, yet you don’t expect a niche console exclusive with a 20-year history to suddenly go multiplatform. This release renders my Atelier collection worthless. This release renders my feeling towards the series worthless, too. My dedication meant nothing. I’m not getting my next present, and it feels so sad. I look at the Atelier Sophie PS4 box and I feel scammed.

The next game in the series - Atelier Firis - will be multiplatform on initial release. It will happen this year.  I will not buy it then. I want to stress, that I would definitely pay the full price if it was still a console exclusive, it’s not questionable. The Steam version will cost very little in my county - about $10 or so. It’s always like this, here, even for the new games if they are niche. I’m still not buying. I’ll wait for Steam sales next year, when it’s $3 or so, then maybe - just maybe - I’ll buy it. So here’s what Gust getting from me instead of a full price, wich I would’ve payed if they hadn’t gone multiplatform. And, like most games on Steam, I don't think I'll even play it. I spent months on other Atelier games, playing with purpose and a goal, but this game will probably just sit there, abandoned, never explored. I actually think it's a most tragic fate for any game – being cheep and never played by people.

I’m not the only person who is devastated by this. The series have a solid fan base. People do not randomly buy new Atelier games from the shelves. There’s a chance that a random person had bought Rorona (because there were not a lot games like this on PS3) or Escha&Logy (because this good game received much media praise), but that’s it. All the other games were bought by fans who didn’t want a discount and would continue buying every Atelier game no matter how bad it was (Shallie was bad, it still got sales). They don’t look for reviews, a new Atelier game is just a must-have. I mean, it was a must-have, but not anymore. It was collector’s stuff, now it’s something that will rot in Steam back shelves.

While I’m at it, I want to congratulate Valve on steadily winning the console war. But they couldn’t do it without the help of greedy corporations who lost the sense of the market, and clueless game developers who forgot who their audience is.

I already made a similar post about Zero Time Dilemma in my blog dedicated to Zero Escape series. Back then the sure console exclusive went multiplatform on its third and final installment at initial release. I was planning no buy the PS Vita version at the very start (because it was a conclusion of a story with a lot of plot twists and I had to know everything before I stumbled upon unforgivable spoilers). But a month before release I realized that the game 1) wouldn't be available in a box in my region for a long time after release, so I would have to buy a digital version; and 2) would also be on Steam, and very cheap in my country. I didn't want to play the hendheld oriented game on PC. I didn't need the price cut for a box. But it's just stupid to buy something digital at a regular price when you can get it 5-10 times cheaper, also digital. So I made a decision.

But that time it was at least fair: I was informed from the start that the game went multiplatform and that it can be bought cheap. I was disappointed (I still am), but I didn't feel scammed. Now this time I feel cheated - they took my money, and then made a huge price cut shortly after.

I had several strange answers to my previous post, and I had to block people who didn’t get the point and told me I was making a problem out of nothing. Well, it’s not nothing. It’s a pattern:

1) Developers decide (or publisher insist) on going multiplatform. As a result they lose profits and their dedicated fan base leaves them. => 2) Big games leave handhelds for the tabletop. As a result the handhelds have small games (or overpriced big ones, compared to PC) and have to compete against the mobile branch - the challenge they can't win. => 3) Players have to chose a PC instead of console or even instead of handheld. Who wouldn't chose a crazy price cut? As a result they have to play games uncomfortably sitting instead of lying down or taking it to transport, or reorganize their rooms to fit the new gaming reality. It's bothersome and can't fully grab the player's attention. => 4) Games lose value, they are bought on sales and never played. The old game fan base turns inactive, the new fan base is never created (you can't create a fan base if they don't play your cheap games). As a result there is no community for the games, no fan base, no fandoms. => 5) The industry changes. It's hard to attach the sense of value to a game. Low budget niche games tend to fall into the same category as indie and retro, even the ones that have a long history behind them. As a result the series get closed, the developers turn to something of the same budget level - the mobile.

So in the end it's just PC + Mobile. I'm not overreacting. Some can tell me that the book industry suffered huge changes several years ago. Few fiction books are printed in good quality, they cost a lot, and everybody just reads digital copies. Everything changes. But the game industry is not quite the same. A book author doesn't stop writing just because the format changed. The content of their books is still the same, they don't have to change their writing to adjust to the new platform. But the games change. A game takes a lot of effort and a team of several people to make. Game series often get closed even if all of their authors love them and want to make them. Publishers decide to close games if they are not profitable enough. Sometimes they have a rather unique view on what is profitable and what isn't. The game series can make stable profits - twice or more the development cost, but the publisher would look at most successful big PC games (AAA ones) and mobile games (often gacha-based) and think, “Why aren't we making this? It's clearly more profitable that way. Oh wait, we don't have enough money for a AAA game and its marketing, so we have only one choice.” So an old console series seizes to exist, and we have another mobile casino instead of it.

I don't like this kind of future. Everybody loses.

[brazenautomaton]

On an entirely different note, you have some strong opinions about New Vegas's story, especially with regards to its shortcomings. if you were tasked with assisting in tweaking the story/worldbuilding a New Vegas; Remastered edition, what changes would you make to improve the quality of the writing?

well A: the “quality of the writing” on a mechanical level is the best part of the game, in terms of, like, the sentences in the script are well-crafted sentences, perfectly suited to being screencapped and waved around by fans saying “See how good this sentence is? This sentence I screencapped from Fallout 4 isn’t as good!” The writing of New Vegas is like an ornately carved wooden table leg, with intricate designs that show off incredible craftsmanship, that doesn’t reach the fucking floor.

B: I don’t think a remaster can fix story issues of this magnitude. People already remember how things were in the original, these aren’t blatant plot holes that you can patch up by adding a scene, it’s trying to alter the entire portrayal of things. People say “Oh, it doesn’t count that the antagonist of New Vegas was bad, because they were going to put in more Legion content but then didn’t!” but in addition to this being nonsense as a defense, it wouldn’t have helped – what we see of the Legion already makes them an awful antagonist that doesn’t do what they need to, and “adding more detail” would, at most, make them self-contradictory in a way the game doesn’t acknowledge.

But assuming I was instead in charge of the game from the start…

There needed to be better communication between different people who were doing different things. We need to know what the game is about and then make a game that is about that. 

People say the game is about choosing an ideological path for the world after the war, but that has no weight or meaning when one of the options is Pure Chaotic Evil and the option opposing them has flaws that are entirely informed and never depicted. People say Caesar is a good villain because he’s just how warlords like him take power for evil ends, when… no he isn’t, not at all, that has never been how that worked.

If the conflict between the NCR and the Legion is to remain the underpinning of the entire game, it has to be about something relevant to the experiences of the people playing it. Not about philosophy they never heard vs faults they never see. 

The force coming in and burning everything shouldn’t be the ones representing absolute oppressive Order. That should be the NCR. The NCR’s flaws should be different than “not committing hard enough” and “not having the strength of will to win a war.” They should be oppressing the Mojave while leaving it to rot. There should be onerous checkpoints and security, an atmosphere of paranoia, and instead of “oh no we want to clean all the bad guys out of this hotel (or whatever) but we can’t because we don’t have the support” being the general story for why they don’t fix problems in the game world, it should be “We’re going to watch this happen but we’re not going to try and stop it until it directly threatens our interests, which don’t include protecting people’s lives.” We should see people being hassled by the NCR forces, and people in the NCR being hauled off on suspicion of spying while protesting their innocence. If we want to keep “the NCR are sending green recruits here” as an element, which is probably necessary to explain how they might lose to the Legion, make it because they are actually, factually expanding to a bunch of different places, and taking forces to pacify them, so they had to institute a draft and most of their recruits really don’t want to be there. And then, show that, by making low-level NCR patrols flee from combat. The attitude from home, expressed by NCR civilian officials we see, should be less “this war is unpopular because it wastes money and lives in ways the player can’t see and don’t make sense,” but “How in the FUCK have you people not finished this job yet? What is taking you so long?” 

Internal divisions in the NCR forces should be between “let’s perform our duties humanely and with honor” and “fuck it, these people don’t appreciate all the good we give them, they just keep trying to hurt us, let’s just do what needs to be done to get what we want and forget about caring for them.” The latter side should be able to say why they feel this way, have histories of Mojave people being shits to them, histories where every time they tried to show charity or humanity it was exploited and used against them. Talking to the NCR people, of which there are by necessity many, should give you an illustration of how a democracy becomes authoritarian and oppressive by a bunch of steps that seemed perfectly justified at the time and that no one person can be blamed for, and now we’re drafting people who don’t want to be here so they can protect people who don’t want to be protected.

The Legion needs a much more substantial rewrite. Fuck everything about Rome and everything about Hegel, all the hatred of women, all the talking about how they are for order and authority. The Legion (or whatever it is renamed) needs to be about something identifiable, the impulse to say “FUCK it! FUCK the system! Burn it all to the ground, that will teach them!” They should be people who are fucking FED UP and LOSING THEIR SHIT about it. (As this was written in 2010, you can’t say “take inspiration from Trumpism!” but you can get this same thing from the early Tea Party). They’re mad as hell, they’re not gonna take it any more, they’re not going to do anything the NCR tells them any more because FUCK AN NCR. Leave the brutality, an expression of their rage, but take out the order. They can burn down Nipton and kill everyone in it, but not because it was a place of drinking and gambling etc; because the place represented some harm to them they were lashing out about (even if that harm was just as symbolic). But spending time with them shouldn��t be scary, it should be fun. They should be honest, passionate people with the ability to get you caught up in their fervor, if only for a moment. The Legionary captured in Camp McCarran shouldn’t be talking about how much he hates women, he should be throwing off every signal that he’s a hero resisting torture by the Evil Army. The NCR should cast them as being purely evil and malicious, and you should have that impression until you meet them, but it should be shown to be untrue. This explains how the Legion can hide in a sympathetic populace, and how people can be turned to support their view, and how the populace might possibly support them.

Caesar could have tried to reorganize them like Rome, maybe we even keep his name as Caesar, but this was what he got instead, and he just rolled with it. He shouldn’t excuse the atrocities hey commit int he name of his order, he should say “Well, can you blame them for how upset they are? You’ve seen how terribly the NCR treats us. They may love me, but I can’t get them to completely forget all the wrongs they’ve suffered, it’s inevitable some of them would take it too far.” If you want, you can even keep the idea that he doesn’t believe what his faction believes and instead thinks it’s a necessary step to something greater, but instead of dialectics, it’s accelerationism. Yeah, we’re burning down a lot of shit, but have you seen how awful the NCR treats us? We’re going to have to totally tear out The System before we can get anything better, so the faster we tear it up the better.” He’s riding a tiger, and it’s moving very fast and eating his enemies, but he’s going to have a hell of a time trying to dismount it.

Framing the fundamental conflict between an organized national military force and a rampaging horde of barbarian rapist murderers as one where the army represents FREEDOM and the horde represents ORDER is nonsense. It’s totally muddled and self-defeating. The NCR are Order, doing a bunch of things that are harmful because they need to do them to prevent everything from going to hell. The Legion are Freedom, liberated from all this oppression and indulging in their basest instincts with nothing to stop them. Siding with the NCR should mean quieting the people saying “fuck being nice, kill all of them” and committing to doing things the right way, which limits their military options; if you side with the Legion, those people should have won out which makes them more of a threat.

Mr. House can stay mostly the same, though his perceived power should be lessened in order to make the NCR more powerful and oppressive; he should not appear to be the one calling the shots in that relationship. He doesn’t want to drive the NCR out, he just wants to manipulate things so he can call the shots and benefit himself and his allies. 

So then the fundamental conflict of the game, instead of being “Will you support this totally evil horde of monsters, or this liberal democracy who we tell you has some flaws you can’t see?”, is now “We got this big ole System that’s up in everybody’s business. Will you try to support it and fix it from within, exploit it to benefit those you care about, smash it to pieces, or walk away from it altogether?” That’s way more relevant to people and has a much better emotional basis. 

[ginnyzero]

Women in TV Pt 2

(I am continuing my discussion about females in television…)

I like a good procedural. There is something about them. They tend to be neat and tidy, the mystery gets solved. The bad guy gets caught. The good guys win out the day. Sort of like my favorite types of movies, action movies. Except procedurals can do this in under an hour, a feat that no action movie has yet captured. I’ve tried my fair share of them. Some are just too creepy (Criminal Minds) or too boring (Leverage) or I get several seasons in and something leaves a very bad taste in my mouth so I go look ahead on the wikis and realize that this is just spelling trouble. (This method hasn’t failed me when I got behind in Grimm and Castle.) In fact, the procedural that I’ve somehow managed to stick with despite its flaws is Bones. (I keep meaning to pick up Rizolli and Isles to watch, but keep being distracted by Project Runway.)

Both Bones and Castle revolve around the ‘job oriented’ female role that solve crime. Temperance “Bones” Brennan is a forensic anthropologist and Kate Beckett is a murder detective. These are both very strong, very intelligent women who had to work hard in fields dominated by men to get where they are. Regardless of the series being named Castle for the main male protagonist Richard Castle, the viewers know that the series really revolves around the women in Richard’s life, his muse, Kate, his mother, Martha and his daughter, Alexis. There is also Laney Parish, Kate’s best friend and the M.E. for the precinct and Victoria Gates, the tough as nails police captain. There are plenty of strong females to choose from.

The series Bones also revolves around Temperance, her friends, co-workers (often the same thing) and interns and primarily her working relationship with Seeley Booth. Bones has more strong female characters outside of Temperance. There is her best friend Angela who is there for emotional issues (I’ve learned things from Angie). There is Cam, her boss. There are the rotating interns, though there are more males than females among them. There is also the DA, Caroline.

Both series have strong female characters going for it. Ones that stand up for themselves. They have life goals and plans and the men in their life are nice, but not necessary. So, why did I stop watching Castle, but continue with Bones?

It really came down to how the showrunners handled their characters in crisis. At the end of Season four of Castle, Beckett was put at a rock bottom state by the showrunners. Instead of sticking to her ideals and being the woman that we had spent four seasons worth of show time with, Kate Beckett instead was written to go to Castle and say that Castle was completely right and she was completely wrong. This lead to the next half of a season of Kate questioning whether or not she and Castle should be together due to their financial and supposed social disparity. And whether or not Castle was truly right and Kate was truly wrong was quickly sidelined for this soap opera-ish, high school feeling plot line that didn’t end until Alexis was kidnapped and by then, I didn’t care anymore. I felt insulted that my intelligence and that a female character like Kate Beckett was reduced to this emotionally at high school level moron when she’d never exhibited such traits before.

Whereas, when Temperance faced a crisis and was close to rock bottom, while she sought Booth’s comfort, she didn’t give up the core of who she was to do so. And in the continuing seasons, when Temperance and Seeley sought to build a family together and decide on things like job versus home and house buying and where Christine should go to kindergarten, Temperance never abandoned the core of who she was as a character. They may have argued, but they also compromised based on each other’s values. If something is important to Seeley, Temperance would consider doing it because what is important to Seeley is also important to her. She didn’t question whether or not she and Seeley should be together in a high school angst ridden way. They worked together. They were forming a family together. She didn’t see how there was much difference. They got along at work. So why couldn’t they get along as a couple? (We know it doesn’t work like that, but logic!)

Now, there will be some who argue that Temperance having a baby was against her character and they liked the fact that she was an outspoken advocate for not having children, on the other hand, I also see Temperance feeling she has a duty to pass on her genetics in hopes of passing on her intellect. (Not that this really works, but you get the idea.) She is very logical in her thought processes, so once she was pregnant, I couldn’t see her terminating it. She never exhibited a great deal of maternal emotions after either.

Two words: Character consistency.

Procedurals don’t all have to revolve around solving crime. Some shows are more of “monster” or “crisis” of the week variety. The show The Librarians I think falls under “crisis” of the week. Despite the title, the Librarians really isn’t about the four librarians, but it is more about their guardian and protector, Eve. But the title The Guardian was already taken and the television show is continuing in the universe of some made for TV movies in the vein of Indiana Jones, “The Librarian and the…” The idea is there is a Library that is a holding vault for magical artifacts and original edition books and The Librarian is the keeper of it and goes out and collects artifacts for safekeeping so those with villainous intent can’t get their hands on them. And The Librarian, who is generally a genius of some sort, needs to have a Guardian since, geniuses can’t always be counted on to act rationally and save themselves when they are in the throes of intellect. The series starts off with The Library choosing a new Guardian in the form of Eve and they discover that the villains of the season are killing off those that have potential to become the next Librarian. So, plot happens and the new Guardian is left to train up four apprentice Librarians so to speak, while The Librarian goes off to do his own adventures. She, the Guardian, and the apprentice Librarians end up having their own adventures as she ‘trains’ them to survive.

(I find this whole concept refreshing, perhaps it is the appeal of Ghostbusters, where the nerds can also be action heroes and save the day. The Librarians doesn’t leave me with the slimy aftertaste of Ghostbusters however.)

What I liked about this show is the use of a female protector rather than a male as we normally see in shows such as this (or movies for that matter, the Terminator anyone) and that Eve is smart enough to bring more than just brawn to the table as she deals with a group of ‘geniuses.’ She has to be, at times, the social glue that keeps them all together and interface with those they come in contact with. What was really nice about this show that unlike with Killjoys, her love interest, the Librarian, wasn’t around so by force, Eve couldn’t be reduced to a love interest role. If she often played the role of the fool of the Tarot deck, it was to get the apprentice librarians who play the role of the Pope, the intellect card, to get their head out of theory and into the moment. Which if you have been around any artistic or intellectual types, one knows that sometimes getting them to do anything but talk is like herding cats.

Eve had her flaws. There were times she most certainly didn’t want to be there. She had a short temper and would rather use her gun to solve problems. The lack of clear planning often annoyed her. Along with the Library’s tendency to reorganize any space she tried to make for herself back to the way it was before she rearranged it. The story as the Librarian stands wouldn’t be the same without Eve, as they actually showed in one episode where Eve visited four different timelines where she died in her role as the Guardian protected the four apprentices and how things went horribly wrong in those universes.

I can only hope that the Librarians continues in this vein and in the second season doesn’t reduce Eve to the role of a love interest.

(Once again, to be continued…)