#and not lol

[mamayan]

Fat Gum (Toyomitsu Taishirō) Headcanons!

(I love some good yandere content, but I just can’t see this man ever becoming a yandere. He’d sooner never love again than force you into anything. If he really snapped and progressed as a yandere, he’d be the type to silently watch over you for the rest of your life if you didn’t reciprocate his love.)

SFW Headcanons:

• This man is a cinnamon roll in the streets and a cinnamon roll in the sheets.

• He’s the most likely to fall in love with you for your personality… and taste in food. Looks really aren’t all that important to him, but he enjoys if you compliment him! Tell him how nice it is to lay on him or snuggle, it makes his whole week.

• This man is literally the best date you could ask for, no need to worry about where you’re going or what your doing and especially what you’re going to eat. It’ll all be amazing.

• His hero work does take a lot of time away from your relationship, but he’s not one to ever neglect or ignore you. Dates can and will be done on video chat, sharing a meal and evening together even if you aren’t physically close.

• Buys you all the stuffed animals, books, video games, whatever hobby supplies you could ever want. His love languages are physical touch, gift giving, acts of service, and words of affirmation. He’s literally full of sugar I swear.

• Don’t think he’s a doormat though, he’s a classic Osaka man and has a temper (it usually only comes out when he sees or hears about something unjust or awful, but it can happen if someone cuts in line while he’s waiting for Takoyaki, or you telling him about a co-worker or customer being rude to you at work).

• Gives amazing foot rubs for such big hands, perfect pressure application.

• Traditional in dating. Likes the flowers, candies, dates, and all the mushiness of romance and love. Will likely take you on a multitude of dates before ever even kissing your cheek.

• He’s nearly 30, this man isn’t looking for a quick fling. He’s looking for his future, and if he’s dating you, it’s with serious intentions.

• If you nap on him, he’ll treat it the same way as one does when a cat sleeps on them. He’ll be careful even breathing to not wake you. Might snap a couple pictures too.

NSFW 🔥 MDNI ⛔️ :

• He’s 8’2, which means he’s not small even when he’s burned through all his fat. He’s an enormous man, and has an enormous cock, without a doubt. It’s not even the sexy big either, it’s the “Need 3-6 months of training and prep to take it” sort of vibe. He’s so cautious with sex it’s put many off in the past, but he cares more about your comfort and pleasure than his own. I love him seriously

• Once you have worked up comfortably to taking him, and he’s less afraid of harming you, it’s on. Cry all you want, Taishiro is a giver through and through, and give he will. He loves to overstimulate you, leave you begging for him to stop because it’s all too much only to throw you over the edge again. Rocking into you, keeping you absolutely stuffed, while he whispers praises in your ear. “So good, aren’t you sugar? Takin’ all of me, ngh, so well.”

• Say goodbye to normal aftercare, after this man destroys your insides (literally) you will be forced into his delicate care afterward. He’s got massage oil, pain meds, a doctor, the bubble bath and ALL the snacks.

• He loves the size difference but won’t say it out loud. You could be in the next lineup as a pro basketball player and look like a little kitten next to him. He adores it. It’s also cute holding you up by the hips and lifting you off the ground to rail into you, when he’s tired of laying down and you riding him. He’s scared to smush you, so this is a safe way to fuck you good and well. Just lift and impale

• He will snack on you like none other. Sit or lay on his face, he insists. His tongue alone could fuck you, it’s got insane girth and power.

• He doesn’t love blowjobs because he can’t see you over his belly. Maybe if he’s been forced to use his fat, he’ll happily accept if you offer. He just wants to see you struggle to take his big cock╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

• If you want him to cum quickly, go ahead and tell him how badly you want to get filled up. “Tai, please, I need your cum… wanna be full” or something pornographic like that, he’ll bust so fast-

• He’s big into lovin’ on you and making sure your calories get replenished after. Expect the BEST aftercare, whatever and anything you want. He’s internally moved by your willingness to take him, it’s an honor to him, really.

[catchymemes]

[frontmansdefender]

[cannibalchicken]

Woah , my garage dog has arrived ,

[mostly-funnytwittertweets]

[daily-spooky]

[only-cat-memes]

[ur-daily-inspiration]

[caats]

[letthehatersbark]

The funniest one star review of Wicked I've seen so far

[thinkspam]

[theknightlywolfe]

[catchymemes]

[frontmansdefender]

[beauty-funny-trippy]